On This Day: December 1, 2011 – Impact Wrestling 2011: Come Home Bobby Roode

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 1, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’ve got two more shows before Final Resolution and the card is starting to come together. It feels like a filler PPV until we get to something a lot bigger. The interesting thing will be if Storm is allowed to wrestle again as he’s really getting hurt by being injured as the mini-feud with Roode he had made him the real star out of the whole thing. But it’s a concussion so it’s hard to say when he’ll be better. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of Roode’s family talking about how he’s pretty much abandoned them and it’s all about him anymore. Cool idea given how he was pushed as this family man when he was going for the title.

Sting opens the show and says everyone is trying to run this place. Right now, he’s going to deal with Bobby Roode, so get on out here. Roode says let’s get this over with. Sting talks about how Roode has done all this stuff and jumped Styles and Hardy to end the show. Roode calls it great TV and says Sting is welcome for what he’s done recently. Sting says he runs the place and it’s run his way. For every bad thing Roode does, there’s a consequence, which starts right now.

Cue AJ and Roode says Sting is fighting AJ’s battles now. Sting also brings out Hardy who asks why Roode doesn’t respect Sting’s authority. Sting says screw you Bobby and makes it a three way match for the main event tonight.

The Knockouts are in robes while Karen yells. She gets in Velvet’s face and yells about disrespect and all that jazz. Tonight they’re going to wash six cars and then the rest of them. Oh and they’ll be in swimsuits. Madison gladly disrobes and looks pretty good underneath it.

Jeff Hardy says he and AJ are about to go talk strategy. Jarrett comes up and takes his jacket off. He wants to know why Hardy thinks he belongs here. Hardy says this is his last shot. Jarrett throws his jacket in Hardy’s face and beats him down. Here’s your backstage brawl of the week.

Bischoff meets with Ray in the back because they don’t have an office anymore. Eric wants Ray to wait before killing his kid. Yeah brilliant there dude. Instead, let’s get rid of Abyss. Ray put him through a table and it did nothing so Eric suggests talking to him. Ray thinks he’s nuts (both Eric and Abyss) so he’ll get Scott Steiner to help talk. Oh geez.

The Knockouts are in bikinis and washing cars and Tara is forced to disrobe. ODB gets a street fight with Mickie James for some reason. If she hurts Mickie she’s the new #1 contender.

Mexican America vs. Ink Inc vs. D-Von/D’Angelo Dinero

Winners are #1 contenders. D-Von and Pope clear the ring until we get down to Pope vs. Anarquia with the street preacher taking over. The Mexicans finally take over until it’s a hot tag to D-Von. There’s nothing interesting going on here. I still want to know why they think pushing D-Von is a good thing. Neal tags himself in, spears Hernandez but walks into a spinebuster from D-Von for the pin at 5:06.

Rating: D+. Whatever man. The tag division is such a joke anymore without any solid teams in there. It’s like the tag champions and the #1 contenders are just slapped together with no real rhyme or reason. This isn’t going to be much of a match and does anyone buy that these guys are going to get the titles?

Here’s Austin Aries to talk a bit. He says he has a problem as the greatest man that ever lived. His plan was to revitalize the division and bring in some greatness, but his greatness is so far ahead of everyone else. It’s time to call this the A Double division. No one can hold a candle to him so….oh dang it here’s Kid Kash.

He talks about Turning Point and how Aries screwed him over after Kash took out Sorensen for him. It’s an old vs. new argument and Aries says he’s champion. Kash says he held it before. Aries says shake my hand and you have a shot. They shake hands and punch each other at the same time. I think that’s supposed to be a face turn for Kash.

Gunner goes to find Garrett Bischoff at a gym.

AJ says he’ll win tonight.

Gunner tries to find Garrett Bischoff but finds someone else who he beats up. No one else seems to care. He keeps looking and annoys someone else. Gunner beats up two more people and then the original guy comes back. There’s a clothesline for him and then he chokes the guy down. He hurts a guy’s arm and tried to be menacing, saying he’s coming for Garrett.

Sting yells at Jarrett, telling him to stay out of the main event tonight. Jarrett says Sting has no room to talk because he was in the match with Hardy at Victory Road. Sting says there will be consequences if Jarrett interferes. Jarrett says he might be willing to pay that consequence.

More parenting stuff from Roode’s “wife”.

The Knockouts are still washing cars. Taz’s car is in line for later and a bus or something like that comes up.

Steiner is lifting weights when Ray comes up to talk about Abyss. CAN WE HAVE A WRESTLING MATCH ALREADY??? Steiner suggests offering a freak to Abyss to get him to join their team again.

Mickie James vs. ODB

Street fight. It’s a brawl on the ramp to start and they roll towards the ring. Street fights mean falls count anywhere here I guess. Mickie’s rana is countered into a powerbomb. They go into the crowd and Mickie fights back in front of a handicap ramp. ODB hits her with a lot of metal stuff and Mickie looks a bit dead. We do the odd hardcore match thing where people insist on walking around.

She walks around even more until Mickie gets in a chop. Gee, I wonder if the minute long walk had anything to do with her getting a second wind. Back to the ring and Mickie starts her comeback. ODB breaks up the jumping DDT and gets a chair. Like any idiot, she holds it in front of her face to allow Mickie to kick the chair into her face for the pin at 7:00.

Rating: D+. Well that was pretty dull. I have no idea why they went walking around like that but I never get that in any wrestling match with hardcore rules. ODB continues to look like an idiot and the girls are still better than the Divas, but they’re still nothing to blow my skirt up. The weak show continues.

Storm (at home) says he’s still out with a concussion. Angle interrupts and asks Storm how it felt to have his head bashed in and how his daughter reacted to it. Angle blames Storm for losing the title so Angle says be here next week to confirm a match at Final Resolution. Storm says it’ll be a beating, not a match.

Some chicks are in the back and looking for Abyss.

We see the long version of Roode’s family complaining. Roode says he got them a bunch of stuff with the money so if he’s a user, so are they.

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Robbie E

Why do I have a feeling the obvious ending isn’t the one that is going to happen? RVD dominates to start and sends Robbie to the floor quickly. Big Rob gets in a shot to take over and Robbie pounds away a bit. Back to the floor and here’s Eric Young in underwear with a fire extinguisher. RVD gets a kick to the face and hits the Five Star but Eric has the referee. Daniels runs in and hits Angel’s Wings on RVD so Robbie can get the pin at 4:02.

Rating: Rob. What else do you want me to call it? This was about as predictable as you could want it to be, which isn’t saying much. The match wasn’t the point here obviously and the idea was to have Daniels run in and Young to be all wacky because that’s all he knows how to do.

Steiner’s girls are all messed up after meeting Abyss.

The Knockouts get in a fight with the water and soap. Karen comes in with garden hoses and sprays them all down.

Robert Roode vs. AJ Styles vs. Jeff Hardy

This has over twenty minutes to go so maybe it’ll be good. This is non-title of course. Roode immediately hits the floor and we get our first contact about a minute in with both guys beating on Roode. He gets ping-ponged between the two of them and then clotheslined to the floor. Time for the face showdown….or not. Instead they get in a mini argument over who gets to dive to the floor. Hardy hits a baseball slide as we take a break.

Back with Roode hitting a belly to back suplex for one as Hardy makes the save. AJ gets his eyes raked and accidentally hits Hardy, giving us the showdown we’ve been waiting for. AJ hits his drop down into a dropkick sequence but Hardy takes over and gets two of his own. Roode comes back in and beats both guys down before focusing on Hardy. Spinebuster gets two.

AJ pops back up with the springboard forearm and backflip into the reverse DDT on Roode. Roode takes over again and hits a fisherman’s suplex on AJ which Hardy breaks up. Twist of Fate to Roode and he loads up the Swanton, but here’s Jarrett to crotch him. Roode covers Hardy for the easy pin at 14:30.

Rating: C. Pretty ok match here but at the end of the day, so what? This is more about pushing Jeff vs. Jeff again and that’s not exactly something interesting. Not a bad match at all but I’ve never been a fan of three ways, which isn’t helping things here. At least it sets up a match at Final Resolution, which we’ll get to now.

Sting comes out and makes Jeff vs. Jeff in a cage at the PPV. If Jarrett escapes first, Hardy is gone. If Hardy escapes first, he gets the title shot at Genesis. Karen comes out to yell so she’ll be handcuffed to Sting during the match.

Overall Rating: D+. The biggest problem with this show is that the pacing problems were back. There were five minutes of wrestling in the first hour and for what? So we could have segments about Gunner, Garrett Bischoff, and the Knockouts in swimsuits? That’s what we’re focusing on now? This was a backstage heavy show and that’s really not all that interesting. Also, you don’t need to have Roode’s family pop in all through the show if you’re going to show a full version of it later on. Not a bad show, but pretty boring overall.

Results
D-Von/D’Angelo Dinero b. Mexican America and Ink Inc – Spinebuster to Neal
Mickie James b. ODB – Spinning kick to the face
Robbie E b. Rob Van Dam – Pin after Angel’s Wings
Bobby Roode b. AJ Styles and Jeff Hardy – Pinned Hardy after Jeff Jarrett interfered

 

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Impact Wrestling – November 27, 2013: A Funeral Is The Happiest Moment

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 28, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the Thanksgiving episode tonight and the main story is an eight man elimination tag with Team Roode vs. Team Angle. No word on who will actually be on each team, but it shouldn’t be that hard to figure out. We should also get some buildup for the remaining tournament matches. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Dixie to open things up. With the southern accent rolling she talks about how things have gotten so crazy around here lately that she needs some help. Therefore, here’s hew new Chief of Staff: Rockstar Spud. He’s from British Boot Camp and OVW in case that name means nothing to you. Spud immediately sucks up to Dixie and says Impact would be nothing without her. The roster is put on notice that he’s watching them and that Carter is the queen.

This brings us to the tournament matches. First up we’ve got Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode and the Wheel of Dixie has made that a tables match. Angle vs. Magnus on the other hand is a last man standing match. That’s all on that front as Dixie talks about the winners of the matches tonight getting a feast while the losers get nothing. You can see the food fight from here. Finally here’s Ethan Carter III to suck up to his aunt a bit before his match.

Ethan Carter III vs. Curry Man

The camera is lower than usual here. Curry Man is Christopher Daniels as the mascot of a Japanese curry company. He rants in Japanese a lot and is slammed down a lot as the bell rings. Carter slams the masked head into the mat a few times while telling him how rich he is. We hit a camel clutch and a YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chant breaks out.

A clothesline and a suplex get two for Carter but Curry Man comes back with some forearms and dodges a splash. The jobber comeback is short lived though as he goes to the top and gets punched in the jaw, allowing Carter to slam him down. The One Percenter is good for the pin on Curry Man at 3:37.

Rating: D. I like Carter and it’s a good idea to bring in some slightly bigger names for him to beat up. Curry Man is going to be a one off or two off character at most and there’s nothing wrong with that. Carter is actually nailing this character and that could mean good things for him down the line.

Carter does his catchphrase post match.

We look back at Gunner costing Storm the match last week by throwing in the towel.

Gunner is in the back and will be part of Team Angle tonight. Storm comes in and will be on the team too because whatever problems he has with Gunner can be dealt with on off hours. Gunner says he did what he thought was best last week but Storm doesn’t want to hear it. More on this later I’m sure.

The Bro Mans are with their new DJ Zema Ion when ODB and Eric Young come up. The tag champions aren’t interested in being in the Turkey Bowl tonight, but they’ll take the match upon hearing their opponents: Norv Fernum and Dewey Barnes.

Velvet Sky vs. Lei’D Tapa

Tapa sends her into the corner to start and runs her over, only to have Velvet avoid a charge and get in a few forearms. Gail trips her up though, only to be ejected from the arena. Tapa runs her over again and chokes a lot before kicking Velvet in the face to put her down again. The fireman’s carry into a Stunner ends Velvet at 3:35.

Rating: D. Total squash here which doesn’t really do much for the division right now. There just isn’t anything going on other than Gail, so why have the bodyguard destroy a former star of the division? My guess is they’re setting up Tapa as the big challenger for Gail, but does anyone want to see that?

Video on the Turkey Bowl, a match where the loser wears a turkey suit.

Dewey Barnes/Norv Fernum vs. Bro Mans

This is the Turkey Bowl match with Turkey Bowl bosses ODB and Eric Young at ringside. The Bro Mans now have DJ Zema Ion introducing them which is as good of a job for him as anything else. Robbie rants about how amazing the champions are as Zema does sound effects. The bell rings and the jobbers get rollups for two each, but a Hart Attack ends Barnes at 18 seconds.

Post match the losers are put in the turkey suits while Robbie makes turkey sounds and forces them to dance. The goons seem to enjoy it.

We get another video of AJ in Mexico, talking about what an honor it is to defend the title.


Dixie freaks out and gives AJ one week to give the title back or the legal options begin. What would wrestling be without a legal threat every week?

Roode with with his team: Chris Sabin and Bad Influence. Jokes are made but Roode wants them serious.

Spud hassles the caterer about the Thanksgiving feast tonight.

Angle and Magnus agree to team up tonight but beat each other up for a shot at the title next week.

We get a video on Anderson beating ray last week to end Aces and 8’s.

It’s time for a funeral for Aces and 8’s, held in a funeral home with some Main Event Mafia members, Mike Tenay (in orange subglasses) and Eric Young as the only people there. Joe eats cookies while Young cries. No one has anything to say but Anderson pops out of the casket. He says he was trapped in the team for a year, meaning he rode motorcycles a lot and was part of many many many many many many many many segments on the show. He also thanks Hulk (not named) for sending over a delicious deli plate.

Angle wishes D’Lo the best and throws a bobble head into the casket in his memory. Joe swallows whatever he’s eating and talks about the Aces hiding behind masks which they should have kept on. He has a six pack which symbolizes the only way to look at the bikers without masks on. Joe hands them out instead of throwing them in the casket (making sure not to give one to Kurt in a nice touch). “To the Aces and 8’s: may they ride their mopeds to the shores of Valhalla.”

Tenay talks about Tazz being at the broadcast table with him but buries Tazz’s cut and Brooke’s shorts. The shorts wind up in Tenay’s pocket of course. Eric is up next and buries one of the turkey suits, sending him into a fit of crying. Anderson goes last and thinks about putting in Ray’s hammer but says he’ll keep it since it’s a perfectly good hammer. Ray comes I and tells Anderson to sleep with one eye open in the best interest of his pregnant wife. Ray calls death the final awakening and leaves. Really fun segment here, though it was better in 2005 when they held one for Team 3D and really cranked up the jokes.

Video on Angle being part of One Direction Day, a charity event. Angle had a quick match against a masked man which can be seen on the One Direction Day website if you’re interested.

Spud yells about food some more.

Team Angle vs. Team Roode

Bobby Roode, Chris Sabin, Bad Influence

Kurt Angle, Magnus, James Storm, Gunner

Elimination rules. The captains get things going with both submissions quickly being escaped, giving us a standoff. Bad Influence comes in at the same time so Angle clotheslines them down, sending Daniels to the floor. Off to Magnus for some forearms before he cranks on the arm for a bit. Storm comes in to pound on the legal Daniels before bringing Gunner in for a clothesline/Russian legsweep combo for two. Gunner is sent out to the floor where Kaz and Sabin get in some cheap shots and the heels take over.

Back in and Sabin works over Gunner for a bit, only to quickly tag in Bad Influence. Gunner runs them over and slams Daniels down, allowing for the hot tag to Storm. The corner enziguri puts Daniels down and it’s a Backstabber for Christopher and a Closing Time to Sabin. Last Call drops Kaz but Sabin grabs a rollup to eliminate Storm.

Magnus comes in for the first time and clotheslines Sabin down before bringing in Daniels for some chops to the chest. Magnus charges into a boot in the corner though, allowing for the tag back to Kaz. Bad Influence double teams Magnus down for two but Magnus coms back with a quick slam. A double tag brings in Kaz and Gunner with the tattooed one catching Kaz in an Irish Curse backbreaker. There’s the Gun Rack but Daniels breaks it up. The High/Low is enough to get rid of Gunner and get us down to 4-2.

It’s Magnus in for the good guys but Daniels easily takes him down and works him over. Magnus fights up from his knees before hiptossing Daniels out to the floor. A clothesline off the apron takes Daniels down but Magnus hurts his knee. The medical staff comes out to check on him as we take a break. Back with Magnus gone, meaning it’s 4-1.

The heels hit a series of legdrops on Angle with Sabin getting a two count. Angle grabs a quick cradle but Daniels has the referee to prevent a count. Kurt fights up and takes out as many bad guys as he can with clotheslines before suplexing Roode and Sabin out of their shoes. In a very impressive power and stamina display, Angle hits ELEVEN Rolling Germans on everyone not named Sabin, including one to Bad Influence at the same time.

An Angle Slam puts Sabin down and there’s the ankle lock to Kaz. Daniels tries to break it up so there’s a double ankle lock to Daniels and Kaz at the same time. Roode brings in a chair but gets caught in an Angle Slam. Kurt blasts Roode with the chair for the DQ at 18:18.

Rating: C. This was more about the story than the match, but man alive did Angle look awesome out there. Those German suplexed were impressive and the one to Bad Influence looked awesome. The opening stuff was there to fill in time but that’s fine for something like this. Fun match.

Team Roode celebrates in the back with Roode saying Angle can’t beat him.

Storm wants to know why Gunner didn’t save him in the tag match. Gunner wants to know if they have plans as a team and walks off. Storm says no one dictates the futures of Storm and Gunner.

Video on the final four in the tournament.

The Carters aren’t thrilled with the idea of eating Spud’s feast so they’ll be heading to Texas for their Thanksgiving.

Here are all of the winners of the matches tonight plus Velvet who is with Sabin. Roode points this out and Sabin throws Velvet out. Bobby asks everyone what they’re thankful for. Bad Influence is thankful for their intelligence and large endowment. Kaz is thankful that Park isn’t here to drink the gravy or fornicate with the pumpkin pie. Gail is thankful for being the prettiest and most dominant Knockout in the history of the company. Oh and her family too.

Sabin is thankful for his hair, being the best X-Division Champion ever and Velvet Sky. The Bro Mans are thankful for Mr. O Phil Heath, Zema Ion (officially part of the team) and for being the best team ever. Bad Influence: “I’m not sure about that.” Roode says the real Thanksgiving was last month in Canada and the fans will be thankful when he becomes the next champion.

It’s time to eat but here’s Angle to interrupt. He sees a ring full of turkeys, which are fighting words for the people in there. Roode challenges him to a fight which Angle accepts, and here’s his backup. Fernum and Barnes are still in the turkey suits. You can fill in the blanks yourself here: bad guys are destroyed, food is everywhere, Spud panics, turkeys fly. The good guys, Velvet and ODB celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a go home show for next week’s regular Impact and there’s nothing wrong with that. No one was going to be watching tonight, so why waste anything important on this show? It’s a Thanksgiving special so why not just do some fun stuff and have a big comedy moment to end the show? We can get to the important stuff later on and that’s the right move all around.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. Curry Man – One Percenter

Lei’D Tapa b. Velvet Sky – Fireman’s carry into a Stunner

Bro Mans b. Dewey Barnes/Norv Fernum – Hart Attack to Barnes

Team Roode b. Team Angle, last eliminating Angle via DQ when Angle used a chair

 

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Impact Wrestling – November 21, 2013: What Are They Turning Towards?

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 21, 2013
Location: Impact zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

Usually I start each NXT review by saying Welcome Home but it’s more appropriate in this case. Tonight is the Turning Point special as we return to the Impact Zone in Orlando. The focus tonight is on the tournament with two tournament matches, but we also get Bully Ray vs. Anderson, with the future of aces and 8’s on the line. Let’s get to it.

We open with an Impact365 video of Roode attacking Storm at a bar last night.

We get an opening video recapping both the tournament matches as well as Anderson vs. Ray.

Dixie comes up to Joe in the back and says she’s been watching last week’s show and threatens to fire Joe if he ever takes the same tone that he did last week.

Here’s Dixie to open the show. She plugs an article about her in Sports Illustrated before talking about the disdain she feels for AJ Styles. He’s taken her intellectual property and misrepresented it around the world. There are lawyers around the world ready to shut him down but here’s James Storm for an interruption. Storm says he wants some revenge on Roode but doesn’t think the bullrope he has is going to do enough damage.

He wants to use chairs (Dixie: “No.”), tables (“No!”) and the old woman’s dentures if he can get them out of his mouth. Storm wants it to be a Florida death match but Dixie says the Wheel has spoken. James says that’s cool, because he can call the police and change his minds about filing charges and drop out of the tournament. Dixie still says no, so Storm asks all politely and gets what he wants.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Magnus vs. Samoa Joe

Falls count anywhere. Joe pops upon the screen and says he wants to start the fight in the back. Magnus heads backstage and we take a break. This is joined in progress in the back with Joe throwing Magnus through various objects. Apparently that was a replay and we cut back to the stage with Magnus getting two off an elbow drop. They head to ringside with Joe taking over via some right hands before taking Magnus down with a running boot to the face.

Magnus avoids the backsplash though and peppers Joe with forearms and uppercuts. Joe snaps off the powerslam for two but walks into the Michinoku Driver. Magnus loads up the top rope elbow but Joe stops him with a chop. A superplex is blocked and Magnus knees him in the chest to put Joe on the mat. Now the top rope elbow connects for two but Joe kicks away from the Kingsley Cloverleaf. The Rock Bottom out of the corner puts Magnus down on the floor and the suicide elbow takes Magnus out again for two.

The Brit sends Joe into the barricade and pulls out a chair which he wedges between the bottom and middle rope. Joe reverses a whip into the chair and hooks the Koquina Clutch but Magnus rams him back first into the apron. Magnus ducks a charging Samoan to send Joe head first into the chair for the pin at 7:11.

Rating: D+. There were some decent moments in this but for the most part the stipulation meant nothing at all. That ending could have happened just as easily in the ring and the backstage brawl part was nothing special. This would have been much better as a regular match or a No DQ match but it wasn’t horrible.

Here’s Bad Influence to watch the Joseph Park vs. Abyss match.

Joseph Park vs. Abyss

Park says he’s here to face his brother for the first time only, meaning that this is his turning point. Naturally there’s no Abyss, so Bad Influence says Park isn’t a good story of someone coming up from the bottom. He’s a jar of mayonnaise with a law degree and a cheap track suit.

The reason Park’s mom Bernice, his dad Alfredo and his great great grandfather Jurassic aren’t here tonight is because he’s such an embarrassment. Daniels asks if Park wants to fight but thinks we need blood first. Kazarian pours a bucket of red liquid over Park and Daniels asks where Abyss is. Daniels demands that a loser like Park get out of the ring right now and Park walks away very sad.

Gail Kim vs. Candice Larea

Candice is another newcomer and is a good looking blonde. Gail runs her over to start and gets two off a running dropkick in the corner. Larea comes back with a headscissors and a sunset flip before awkwardly running into the corner. Kim forearms her a lot and catches a hurricanrana in a sitout powerbomb for two. Eat Defeat is enough for the pin on Candice at 1:52.

AJ Styles video from his time in Japan.

Anderson promises that Aces and 8’s are done tonight.

Gunner gives Storm a pep talk before his match.

We recap Storm vs. Roode. They were partners for years until Roode turned heel on Storm to win the title. A long running feud and series of matches followed.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: James Storm vs. Bobby Roode

Florida death match, meaning last man standing. Storm doesn’t want to wait and charge sup the ramp to pound on Bobby with a Singapore cane. Roode makes a quick comeback but gets sent into the steps to stop it cold. They head inside with Storm throwing in a garbage can fill of weapons. Storm hits the corner enziguri but his running neckbreaker is countered with a piece of steel to the head.

Storm comes back by driving the trash can between Roode’s legs and trying a middle rope sunset flip, only to have Roode roll through and kick him in the chest. A catapult into the corner is blocked though and Storm hits a trashcan to Roode’s head twice in a row. Roode is up at 9 but is immediately lifted into the Eye of the Storm which Roode counters into a spinebuster onto the trashcan.

They pound on each other with trashcan lids and both guys go down for a seven count. Roode has a crutch but walks into the Last Call and rolls to the floor. He finds a beer bottle on the floor and smashes Storm in the head but James gets up at nine. Roode clotheslines him down again and hits an Attitude Adjustment through two chairs but Storm is up at nine. Bobby is ticked so he goes under the ring and finds a barbed wire board, which I guess is there just in case a Florida death match broke out. Roode loads up another AA but Gunner comes out to throw in the towel and end the match at 12:00.

Rating: C+. The match was better than a bullrope match would have been but the ending was much more about setting up a future program than the match itself. On top of that, Storm loses in ANOTHER big match which does nothing to help his reputation as a choker. Still though, fun brawl.

Post break Gunner pleads his case but Storm is still furious.

Here are the updated brackets:

Hardy

Roode

Angle

Magnus

Your time wasting segment of the week is a look at Samuel Shaw’s apartment and his artwork. The segment finishes filming and Shaw asks Christy out. She says yes and gives her his number before leaving. Shaw makes sure to straighten the notepad and pens she moved. Apparently he’s OCD.

Ethan Carter III has brought his personal jobbers here again but isn’t facing them again because there’s no challenge. Instead he’s facing a TNA legend.

Ray talks about taking care of Anderson tonight. TNA turned their backs on Anderson a year ago, but after Ray ends his career, he’ll make sure to take care of Anderson’s pregnant wife.

Angle is cutting a promo on Magnus when Dixie Carter summons him to her office.

Ethan Carter III vs. Shark Boy

Shark Boy had announced he was coming back tonight on Impact365 earlier this week. Carter bails to the floor for a chase but still avoids an elbow as they get back inside. The Chummer is countered with ease and the One Percenter is good for the pin at 2:06.

We recap Anderson vs. Ray which stemmed from Ray using the club as a way to get himself over and Anderson not being cool with it. Anderson cost Ray a match against Sting and the Bound For Glory rematch against AJ Styles.

Dixie tells Roode and Angle that they’er going to captain teams in an eight man elimination tag match next week.

Mr. Anderson vs. Bully Ray

No DQ and it’s career vs. Aces and 8’s. Anderson is in long tights for the first time I can ever remember. The roster comes out to watch the match from the stage. Anderson jumps Ray during big match intros and hits him low while shouting his name a lot. They head to the floor with Ray ramming him into the steps but stopping to breathe a bit. Ray pulls out a table and we take our last break. Back with Anderson being suplexed into the ring and chopped loudly in the corner. There’s a table set up in the corner as well.

Ray takes off the chain to whip Anderson even more but Anderson takes the chain away and gets in a few whips of his own. Anderson loads up a big chained fist but gets sent to the floor instead. Ray pulls back the mats but Anderson backdrops Ray onto the concrete instead.

Knux saves Ray from being piledriven on the concrete but gets piledriven down onto the mats for his efforts. Back inside and Anderson hits the rolling senton but Ray fights out of the Mic Check. A spear puts Anderson through the table in the corner but it’s only good for two. Tazz hands Brooke the hammer but Anderson intercepts it and blasts Ray in the head. The Mic Check ends Aces and 8’s at 13:00.

Rating: C+. Not a bad brawl here but Aces and 8’s hasn’t meant anything in months so this isn’t the biggest deal in the world. I’m glad they’re gone for good and it’s a good feather in the cap for Anderson, but this is hardly some huge moment that changes wrestling forever. Fun match though.

Anderson gets Ray and Tazz’s cuts to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Most of the matches were good but this didn’t feel like anything major at all. The ending was so far overdue that it doesn’t even feel like a big deal anymore, but at least it finally happened. As for everything else…..nothing significant really happened. Two first round tournament matches don’t feel like anything major to me but at least the wrestling was good for the most part. Not a horrible or even bad show, but it’s nothing you need to see at all.

Results

Magnus b. Samoa Joe – Joe rammed his head into a chair

Gail Kim b. Candice Larea – Eat Defeat

Bobby Roode b. James Storm – Gunner threw in the towel

Ethan Carter III b. Shark Boy – One Percenter

Mr. Anderson b. Bully Ray – Mic Check

 

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Impact Wrestling – November 14, 2013: They’re Alive But In Name Only

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 14, 2013
Location: Cincinnati Gardens, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the final show on the road before they head back to Orlando which seems to be the best idea they could have at the moment. We’re also a week away from the next Clash of the Champions style show called Turning Point which will likely be a lot of tournament matches and a few other things thrown in on the side. Tonight’s main event is Angle vs. Aries in a submission match which isn’t the most interesting match in the world. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Dixie announcing the tournament and Hardy vs. Sabin in the first match last week.

Here are Aces and 8’s to open the show with Brooke shaking her hips and Ray laughing at Tenay for falling for the ruse last week. Ray asks if the fans know who he is and says this club is about quality. He doesn’t need to be world champion to be the most talked about guy in TNA because everyone knows he’s the be all and end all. Ray accepts the challenge for a match with Anderson at Turning Point but promises to piledrive him through the stage next week.

This brings out Anderson who says that everyone here in Cincinnati is sick and tired of the Aces and 8’s. Therefore, how about if he beats Ray next week, Aces and 8’s are done in TNA, never to ride again? Ray doesn’t see the appeal so he turns it down, so Anderson sweetens the pot: if he loses, he’s gone for good. That’s cool with him too, because his wife is pregnant with twins.

Ray is all cool with that but thinks Anderson is crazy for agreeing to this match. Anderson says that’s right and goes after Ray, only to be beaten down by Knux and Bischoff. Ray gets a chair but Anderson kicks him away and cleans house. Anderson says he’s feeling frisky and wants one of the bikers right now. It looks like it’ll be Knux after the break.

Mr. Anderson vs. Knux

Anderson, in street clothes, pounds away in the corner to start and scores with some right hands. Knux comes back with a cross body for two and they head outside. Anderson is whipped into the steps and apron before Knux suplexes him back inside. Anderson can’t slam him down and gets splashed in the corner. A side slam gets two for Knux but after more slow pounding, Anderson grabs the Mic Check out of nowhere for the pin at 4:50.

Rating: D+. Just a basic warmup match before next week and there’s nothing wrong with that. The match showed how basic Knux is though and that’s the problem with Aces and 8’s. Other than Bully, there hasn’t been anyone not named Anderson worth anything at all. The team has needed to go away for months now and hopefully that happens next week.

We get an Impact365 video from Joseph Park, challenging Daniels to a singles match tonight.

Daniels accepts the challenge in another video where he talks about the medical benefits of appletinis with Kazarian. Daniels runs into Roode walking down the hall and t-shirts are schilled.

Video on Aries vs. Angle for later tonight, focusing on Aries’ submission skills.

Christopher Daniels vs. Joseph Park

Park scores with a quick hiptoss and a right hand to put Daniels down. He doesn’t fall for a Daniels’ handshake and pulls him into a clothesline before Christopher scores with some right hands and a half nelson rollup for two. Park misses an Earthquake splash and Daniels hooks a chinlock. Joseph fights up with a Samoan drop and a side slam for two more. Daniels rolls away before Park can try a middle rope splash but a running splash in the corner connects instead. The referee yells so Daniels kicks Park low for the pin at 5:24.

Rating: D. Well, this happened. There really isn’t much else to say about it either and that’s not a good sign. It’s also very indicative of a major TNA problem: so much of their stuff feels like filler, but we never get to the shows that we’re supposed to be filling time until. In theory it’s Turning Point or Genesis, but Turning Point is mainly tournament matches which is just filler until we get to the winner of the tournament vs. AJ. That’s not good when it feels like everything is just filler until BFG time. In case you couldn’t tell, there wasn’t much to this match.

Ray promises to beat Anderson next week.

Norv Fernum/Dewey Barnes vs. Ethan Carter III

Carter is now 7-0 after winning on some house shows this weekend. The jobbers work on the arm to start until Carter takes Barnes’ head off with a clothesline out of the corner. A snap suplex sets up a belly to back suplex on Dewey before the tag is off to Fernum for some top rope dropkicks. Norv gets two off a tornado DDT but Carter hits 1 Percenters on both guys for the double pin at 3:29.

Rating: D+. Carter is still working for me as a character but they need to do more for him soon before he gets boring. I still think he winds up in the title scene sooner rather than later and shockingly enough, that doesn’t sound too bad. He’s definitely playing the character well but he needs a few decent wins for credibility.

We see another AJ in Mexico video, with Styles saying he’s an awesome wrestler.

Dixie freaks out on the production team for letting that video air.

Jeff Hardy talks about his injuries in the match last week but saying it’s just step one to winning the title.

Here’s Dixie to proclaim how great she is. Sometimes it feels great to say how amazing you are, such as when she kicked AJ off the show and raised the quality of the show. It also proves her point that no one is irreplaceable. AJ left in her car with her title but in a few weeks we’ll have a new champion to replace Styles. Dixie talks about the tournament being all gimmicky and calls out the four people in the matches next week: Bobby Roode, James Storm, Magnus and Samoa Joe.

She spun the Wheel of Dixie earlier and it’s Roode vs. Storm in a bullrope match, with Dixie picking Roode to win. Dixie talks about Storm not doing anything for her lately, so Storm talks about being a cowboy and says his catchphrase. On the other hand, Joe vs. Magnus is going to be falls count anywhere. Joe says the only reason this tournament is going on is to cover for her inability to sign AJ to a new deal. Once he runs through the tournament, AJ gets the first title shot whether it’s here or anywhere else in the world. Magnus cuts Joe off and says he’ll win, but Dixie says this is all about finding her one true champion. Nice segment.

Anderson beats up Bischoff in the back and handcuffs him to a metal cart.

Video on Angle’s submission skills.

Gail Kim vs. Hannah Blossom

This is the Gail Kim open challenge to anyone from outside of the company. If Hannah wins, she gets a title shot down the line. Gail kicks her in the head to start and rams Hannah into a buckle. More kicks put Blossom down and there’s the Figure Four around the post for good measure. Hannah makes the jobber comeback but misses a charge and Eats Defeat for the pin at 3:28.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as usual with Kim. She’s decent in the ring but I just do not care about her at all and haven’t in years. It’s another case of something we’ve seen so many times that there’s no reason to get interested in it at all. At least we’re getting some fresh Knockouts for the time being though.

Joseph Park comes out again and talks about how he doesn’t know where Abyss is. All he knows is that Abyss is a future TNA Hall of Famer and issues an open challenge to Abyss for next week. That should be interesting.

Anderson carries Bischoff away on his shoulders.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Kurt Angle vs. Austin Aries

Submission match. Feeling out process to start with Angle taking it to the mat and putting on a headscissors. Aries rolls out of the ankle lock but Kurt bails to the floor to avoid the Last Chancery. Back in and Aries grabs a quick STF but Angle is in the ropes even faster. Angle comes back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker but Roode comes out with a chair to watch from the stage. Kurt gets distracted, allowing Aries to dive off the top, only to be caught in a belly to belly. Aries dropkicks him to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Aries in control and going after the neck, only to wake Angle up in the process. Angle rolls some Germans but Aries armdrags Angle out to the floor. A big top rope ax handle to the floor puts Kurt down again but Aries hurts his ankle in the process. Aries comes back in with a missile dropkick but Angle grabs the ankle lock in midair to take over.

Aries counters by rolling Angle into the corner but Angle catches the running dropkick in another ankle lock. Austin rolls through again to send Angle outside but it’s quickly back inside so Aries can hit the missile dropkick. The corner dropkick sets up the brainbuster and the Last Chancery but of course Angle doesn’t tap.

Aries lets go of the hold and Angle snaps off another suplex, only to have Aries get up top. He throws Angle off to block a running suplex but Aries’ 450 only hits mat and hurts the ankle again. The Angle Slam is countered twice but Aries misses a charge into the post and Angle Crossfaces him for the win at 16:45.

Rating: B-. I liked the match but it felt like it was just waiting until we got to the inevitable. That’s a major problem for so much of TNA’s stuff anymore as you can call most of what they’re going to do anymore. Aries was trying but it was a lot of the same stuff we always see from him. Still way better than anything else tonight though.

Anderson drags Bischoff out to piledrive him on the stage to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The show wasn’t bad tonight but it’s clear that they’ve only got two stories at the moment. Luckily for them the stories aren’t bad, but that’s going to catch up to them in the long run, as it always does. The matches were rather bad for the most part though with mainly a night of squashes to set up the big show next week. The main event helped but Angle winning was somewhat obvious. Again, the show has no soul though and it’s showing more and more every week.

Results

Mr. Anderson b. Knux – Mic Check

Christopher Daniels b. Joseph Park – Low blow

Ethan Carter III b. Norv Fernum/Dewey Barnes – Double pin after 1 Perfecters to both men

Gail Kim b. Hannah Blossom – Eat Defeat

Kurt Angle b. Austin Aries – Crossface

 

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On This Day: November 8, 2012 – Impact Wrestling: Back When Aces and 8’s Were Just Getting Old

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 8, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz, Todd Keneley, Jeremy Borash

Last week’s big moment was the unmasking of Luke Gallows who doesn’t actually have a name at this point. Other than that we had Gut Check and the announcement of a three way for the #1 contendership. Odds are tonight is mostly about Aces and 8’s, but that’s pretty much all you can expect to get on Impact anymore. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the announcement of the triple threat. The guy who takes the fall can’t get a title shot until BFG next year, which is a nice idea actually. We also hear about Aries vs. Hardy being a ladder match. Aries: “IT WAS JUST A METAPHOR JEFF!” Those things are just about the world title match though, so now let’s focus on the important thing: ACES AND 8’s! And that guy who we don’t have a name for yet but is more famous as Luke Gallows!

Aces and 8’s are yelling at Gallows, who is now named Doc (Director of Chaos), because he lost his mask before he was even made a full fledged member of the team. Tonight it’s Doc/D-Von vs. Angle/Sting. This sums up the major problem with the reveals so far: how in the world am I supposed to buy D-Von and Luke Gallows as a legitimate threat to beat Sting and Angle, two of the best of all time?

AJ Styles vs. Bobby Roode

Storm is on commentary. They fight for control of a wristlock to start before heading to the mat. Roode appears to have gotten a haircut. He blocks AJ’s drop down/kick sequence but AJ sends him to the floor with ease. Styles sends him into the steps and drops a knee back inside as Storm says he would pin Roode if he had to pick. There are ads on the mat now too, which is fine as it brings in some extra cash.

A big backdrop puts Roode down but Bobby gets in a shot to the back to take over. We take a break and come back with Roode hot shotting AJ on the top rope. A Blockbuster gets two for Roode as does an elbow drop. Storm says he’d work with Roode to beat AJ if necessary. I can see the “BEER MONEY REUNION???” posts already. Roode hooks a chinlock for a bit but AJ fights up and hits an enziguri to put both guys down.

We head to the corner with AJ pounding away but getting guillotined on the top rope to slow him down. The disadvantage lasts about eight seconds as AJ comes back with a top rope rana for two. The Clash is escaped and there’s the spinebuster from Roode for no cover. The spear misses though and AJ rolls him up into a Styles Clash position, but Roode kicks him in the head to escape. Pele misses and the fisherman’s suplex gets two for Bobby. Really good sequence there.

Bobby goes to the floor for a chair but Storm comes down to take it away from him. Styles hits a BIG springboard dive to take Roode out but stops to yell at Storm. Back in, AJ loads up another springboard but Roode knocks him off the ropes and gets a fast pin at 10:50 shown of 14:20.

Rating: B. Solid match here and for a TV match, this was great stuff. AJ and Roode have good chemistry together and when you can beat AJ Styles clean on TV, you’ve got something going for you. As for the PPV, you have to think Roode wins, but PLEASE don’t let Storm get pinned. There’s no reason to keep him out of the title scene for ANOTHER year as he never got a real run with the belt anyway which he’s more than capable of doing.

Aries runs into Hogan in the back. Aries complains about the ladder stipulation so Hulk says that if Aries doesn’t give the belt back by the end of the show, Aries loses his title shot.

We run down the remaining card for the show when the feed starts messing up. The screen says “An Ancient Evil Awakes”. Abyss maybe?

Angle is talking to Wes Brisco about timing when Sting comes up. Sting wants Brisco watching their back in the main event tonight. Are we really supposed to not get that Brisco is a member of the team? It’s obviously him given the hair, but are we supposed to not notice it?

Joseph Park is in the ring and after asking if it’s ok for him to talk, he says his body isn’t meant to go through tables and he loved the feeling of taking off Doc’s mask. His legal partners don’t want him to have a match with Aces and 8’s but he has to be a man. First though we have to make the pilgrimage to Mt. Hogan to beg for the match though, because if Hogan’s ego doesn’t get stroked every other segment, that’s just not cool brother.

Here’s Hogan who says that Park is a great guy but he got lucky last week instead of being good. Before Hogan can say no though, here’s Ray with an interruption. Ray says Park isn’t a fighter but he has a lot of guts and a lot to prove. The Bully believes in Joseph Park and so do the fans. Bully to Hulk: “Why say no when it feels so good to say yes?” It’s that mentality that led to the sex tape issue brother. Hogan says just this one time and shakes Park’s hand.

Tara hits on Jesse, who says that he used shooting star presses and a super double tiger driver last week. ODB comes in to yell at the two of them and wants a handicap match next. Jesse: “We’re going to need A LOT of hand sanitizer.”

AJ rants about Storm when the Cowboy comes in.

ODB vs. Tara/Jesse Godderz

Tara and Jesse actually skip down to the floor. They don’t have to tag here so ODB beats up both of them at once. Jesse gets rammed into ODB’s cleavage and there’s a double noggin knocker. A double elbow puts ODB down before Tara raves over the bicep a bit. ODB slams them both down and avoids a charging Jesse. Tara gets sent into his crotch and it’s a double bronco buster. ODB spears Tara down for the pin at 2:40. I smell a tag match Sunday.

ODB gets beaten down with a flask shot post match. Jesse pours the contents on her body.

Post break, ODB is on the phone with Eric’s voicemail and says the tag match is on.

Apparently on Thanksgiving, all of the Gut Check winners will be there. Oh joy.

The Gut Check judges have a chat. Taz thinks it’s a no brainer but doesn’t say which side he’s on. This goes on for awhile and Snow’s jacket gets made fun of.

Sting/Kurt Angle vs. Doc/D-Von

Before you ask, no I don’t be calling him DOC in all caps. Seriously, it makes zero difference so spare me the arguments that I’m saying it wrong. Tenay and Taz take over on commentary. The brawl starts on the floor with Angle destroying D-Von and Sting doing the same to Doc. Sting and Doc start in the corner and Sting hits a quick DDT for two. A D-Von distraction lets Doc hit a clothesline to take over as things get down to normal.

Off to D-Von who drops an elbow for two before bringing Doc back in. A suplex gets two and it’s off to the chinlock. That goes nowhere so D-Von drops a leg for two. Angle gets punched in the face to break up a tag and D-Von pounds Sting down in the corner. A Doc splash gets two as Angle makes the save. Back to D-Von for the spinning elbow for two as Aces and 8’s are using REALLY basic stuff so far.

Doc and Sting clothesline each other down and there’s the hot tag to Angle. House is cleaned and it’s a German for Doc and the Slam for D-Von. Everything breaks down but as Sting puts Doc in the Deathlock, D-Von hits Sting and Angle with the ball bat for the DQ at 5:41.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as the match existed to get to the end. Like I said earlier, it’s really hard to buy these guys as threats to a team like Sting and Kurt Angle. The match wasn’t horrible or anything it was was absolutely nothing to get excited or interested about at all. If nothing else, Doc has a good look to him with the size and bald head.

Post match here’s Bully for the save and he loads up a table. D-Von runs as soon as he sees it so Sting comes back to beat up Doc. More members come in with a hammer to save Doc and Sting gets put through the table. Angle gets knocked to the floor and Doc “hits” Sting with the hammer, clearly missing his hand by a good space. Joe, Chavo and Hernandez make the save. You know, because you should be afraid when you have the high ground AND A HAMMER. Sting gets taken out by medics.

This has nothing to do with what just happened, but apparently that Ancient Evil Awakes is a Halo 4 ad. Silly me for thinking an ad during a wrestling show was about wrestling.

Time for Gut Check, because that transition is fine. Taz says yes without a doubt and Prichard says yes as well, giving York the contract. I can’t argue with that one.

Aries is in the back on the phone when he sees Brooke and Ray arguing over something. They see him coming and stop immediately because they don’t want him to hear. We’ve got intrigue!

We recap Hardy vs. Aries.

We run down the Turning Point card. Unless I’m missing it, does Ray not have a match?

Hogan is on the phone asking for updates on Sting when he runs into Joey Ryan. Ryan says Hulk can congratulate him on winning the X Title which he hasn’t gotten a shot at yet. Hogan tells Morgan that Matt isn’t allowed at ringside on Sunday. Morgan says Hulk has no idea who he’s messing with but he’ll find out. I still want Morgan as the Aces and 8’s boss. Morgan and Ryan leave and Hogan says he does know.

Samoa Joe/Chavo Guerrero Jr./Hernandez vs. Christopher Daniels/Kazarian/Magnus

It’s a big brawl to start with Chavo vs. Daniels finally getting things going. Daniels gets beaten around like a pinball before Chavo suplexes him down for two. Daiels hits a knee and tags Kaz but the beating continues very quickly. SuperMex comes in with a splash for two and it’s time for Magnus vs. Joe. The British guy who used to be a gladiator for some reason runs to the floor and upon reentry, the heels gets in a shot to Joe’s back to take over.

Everything breaks down again until it’s Joe hammering away on Daniels in the corner. Daniels drops a knee and brings in Chavo with a slingshot hilo for two. Hernandez hooks a bearhug into an overhead belly to belly before it’s back to Chavo who gets two off a dropkick. Some double teaming FINALLY slows Chavo down and the beatdown begins. A running jumping swinging neckbreaker gets two for Kaz and it’s off to Magnus again.

Daniels acts like he’s riding a horse for some reason before it’s off to Kaz for a bow and arrow hold. Chavo fights up and hooks a headscissors to take Kaz down and make the tag off to Hernandez. House is cleaned and Daniels gets launched with a shoulder block. The Border Toss is broken up but Daniels/Kaz’s double suplex is countered into a suplex on both of them by Hernandez. Off to Joe vs. Magnus with the Samoan taking over. Magnus charges into the Rock Bottom out of the corner.

The two of them head to the floor as does Daniels, so here’s a big dive by Hernandez to take them out. Chavo loads up the Frog Splash on Magnus but Kaz breaks it up. Joe loads up the MuscleBuster on Magnus but Daniels makes the save. There’s the Clutch on Daniels but it’s broken up by a jawbreaker. Daniels and Kaz go High/Low on Joe and a top rope elbow from Magnus gets the pin at 11:00.

Rating: B-. Solid six man tag here with the exactly right ending. This gives you a reason to believe Magnus can in fact win the title from Joe which wasn’t really something that was easy to buy into earlier. That’s basic booking and that’s all you need to do most of the time, yet most companies don’t get it.

Roode says his plan is coming together with AJ fighting Storm.

We recap the attack on Sting.

Here’s Aries to return the belt. There’s a ladder at ringside and another one in the ring. Aries says that Hardy says he’s the best wrestler on the planet. Well Aries is the best wrestler in the universe. Either this universe, or any universe. They’re going hard with the WWE jabs lately. Austin talks about how Hardy has lived and died by the ladder match. Hardy has fallen a lot, but on Sunday the fall is going to be worse than any he’s ever had. The fans keep chanting WHAT so Aries goes off on them a bit.

Aries says he’s going to use Hardy’s belt as a belt buckle, meaning Hardy’s face will be down by his crotch (his words, not mine). If Hardy wants this belt back, come and get it. Here’s Hardy who knocks Aries to the floor and takes the title before climbing up the ladder. He hangs both belts and poses but Aries shoves him off the ladder and stomps him down to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Good show overall here and pretty good hype for the PPV, but again, we’ve got a lawyer fighting a career enforcer and Kurt Angle vs. D-Von which we’re supposed to pay for. They need to reveal someone big soon or the interest they’ve got left in this story is going to die soon. That’s a problem because it’s ALL OVER the TV shows. The other stuff with the world title related matches is really good though and I’m looking forward to the show. Still though, where is Bully Ray?

Results

Bobby Roode b. AJ Styles – Pin after knocking Styles off the top rope

ODB b. Tara/Jesse Godderz – Spear to Tara

Sting/Kurt Angle b. D-Von/Doc via DQ when D-Von hit Angle with a baseball bat

Magnus/Kazarian/Christopher Daniels b. Samoa Joe/Chavo Guerrero Jr./Hernandez – Top Rope Elbow To Joe

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Impact Wrestling – November 7, 2013: Just Let Them Fold Already TNA

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 7, 2013
Location: Cincinnati Gardens, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Taz, Mike Tenay

It’s a big show this week for TNA as this is the start of their world title tournament, perhaps the final Impact outside of Orlando for a good while and it’s the 500th episode. However, what has TNA been focused on with their new Impact 365 dead? The fact that Pacman Jones is back in TNA for a show or two.

For those of you that aren’t familiar with him, he’s the guy that was suspended from the NFL for a year and thought he’d make a quick buck “wrestling” (read as standing on the apron and making a cover here or there) in the mean time. Now he’s famous for being a decent football player that hasn’t gotten arrested in a few years. He’s been the focus for TNA in their internet videos late. Let’s get to it.

We open with Dixie in the back with Pacman when Mr. Anderson comes up. He doesn’t want any trouble but just a match with Bully. Dixie says she can make that happen.

We get a recap of AJ leaving and the announcement of the world title tournament via a voiceover similar to a movie trailer.

Pacman Jones and another Cincinnati Bengal are in the front row.

Here’s the Main Event Mafia, which is actually still a thing. Sting says the Mafia has accomplished its goals of keeping Aces and 8’s at bay and taking the world title away from Bully Ray. Today he can say mission accomplished, even though there has been a lot of trials and tribulation along the way. As of today, the Mafia is being put back up on the shelf. All of them have something they’re doing at the moment, such as Sting coming up short in the gauntlet match and the other three all being in the world title tournament.

Sting is going to be dealing with this thing called entitlement. He’s going to be dealing with those people that are trying to come in on top without ever having to pay any dues. Sting has respect for this business and hugs all three members of the team. He says he loves Joe and Angle but only hugs Magnus before walking away. Joe takes the mic and says he’s been denied a world title for far too long. The road to the title starts with Magnus and it’s going to go through Angle. They’re all friends, but Joe is going to remind them why they make far better enemies.

Magnus says that Angle is on a road to redemption but it’s also Magnus’ road to destiny. He loves Angle like a brother, but after he goes through Joe, he’ll mow Angle down if he has to. His goal is to become world champion but the fans don’t seem to have the same vision that Magnus has.

Angle is left alone in the ring and says Sting is right. They all have their own goals and his is to become world champion once again. He also wants to prove he’s Hall of Fame worthy, but last week he suffered a setback. Last week he was told he wasn’t cleared to compete, but since then he’s talked to his personal doctor….but here’s Roode with an interruption.

Roode says he’s embarrassed for Kurt because he keeps having to make excuses. Angle needs to be a man and admit that he’s lost twice in a row to the It Factor. Roode’s goal is the world title as well, and if he has to face Angle in the finals, he has no problem destroying him for a third time. Angle is cool with that but doesn’t want to wait for the finals so the fight is on now.

Angle is still in the ring after the break and says he’ll wait in the ring until he gets Bobby Roode even if it’s until next week. Roode comes right back out at him but security tries to break it up. The guys are finally split up after a few moments but Angle sprints up the ramp to get another piece. Joe, Magnus and Bad Influence come out to try to split them up and both guys are finally taken to the back.

The opening segment somehow keeps going with Bad Influence getting in the Bengals’ faces, only to have them come into the ring and slam Kaz and Daniels down.

Garrett and Knux say the condition of the club is none of the people’s business. Anderson comes up behind them and says that he just wants to talk. He says what they did to him was the best thing they’ve ever done to him. They need to get out of the club though because this isn’t what they started.

Velvet Sky vs. ODB vs. Brooke

Winner gets a title shot at some point in the future. Brooke and Velvet shake it a bit to start so ODB chests them down. A double Bronco Buster has Brooke and Sky in trouble but Brooke rolls ODB up for two. ODB gets knocked to the floor so Velvet can get a neckbreaker for two on Brooke. Velvet gets powerslammed down but Brooke takes her down and drops a top rope elbow to ODB. Everyone is down so here are Gail and Lei’D Tapa to watch as we take a break.

Back with a three way slugout with ODB taking over. Both girls put a half crab on Brooke at the same time. The alliance doesn’t last long as Velvet starts chopping away at ODB, only to be ran over again. ODB slams Brooke onto Velvet but goes to the floor to yell at Tapa and Kim. Brooke hits a dropkick through the ropes before clotheslining Velvet down. Everyone is back inside now and Brooke hits a cross body to take out both girls at once. Gail and Tapa get up on the apron and Gail comes in to break up In Yo Face to Brooke for a DQ at 9:45.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match in the world but the ending sucked. Since when are there DQ’s in a triple threat match? Velvet and ODB were their usual selves but Brooke looked a bit better than her typical performance here. The downside here is how obvious it was that the division is dying for some fresh blood though.

Post match Gail and Tapa destroy everyone (save for some forearms from ODB that staggered Tapa). Gail says it’s clear she has no competition so she’s issuing an open challenge to anyone from outside the company and if anyone beats her, they can have a title shot.

We get a video from AJ Styles of a title defense in AAA in Mexico.

Bully goes up to Knux and Garrett in the back and says he’s tired of being ignored. Knux goes on a rant about how this isn’t their club anymore but all about Bully. Ray says it’s because he’s president but Knux demands a vote tonight from all three of them and Taz. Knux storms off but Ray grabs Garrett and glares at him.

Dixie is on the phone, yelling at someone to fix the person who is humiliating her (presumably AJ). She hangs up when Ethan Carter III comes in. Dixie says he’s done a great job but they need to change their plan a bit. Tonight he gets to pick his opponent which he thinks will mean the end of the streak. Dixie says keep the intensity up.

It’s time for the Aces and 8’s vote. Ray comes out last and says his catchphrase but Garrett cuts him off by saying yes, they do know who he is. Before the vote can be taken, Anderson comes out to watch. Garrett votes that he’s finished and takes off his cut. Ray appeals to Knux but Knux says he doesn’t need Ray or the club. He takes off the cut as well, leaving just Tazz and Ray in the club.

Ray assumes that Tazz is going to vote with him, which Ray says we’re going to a tie, which goes to a president. Ray sucks up to Taz a bit before saying Tazz knows how to do what his president tells him to do. Tazz takes the mic and tells Ray to hit the brakes a little bit. They’ve been friends for a long time but have always done the right thing. The club has been about Bully’s agenda alone for way too long, so Tazz is done too. Ray says put those colors back on but Tazz says make him.

Ray yells at Anderson for ruining everything so Anderson throws out a challenge for a No DQ fight at Turning Point. Bully talks about Anderson looking up to Steve Austin, but Anderson has forgotten the first rule. Garrett and Knux jump Anderson so Ray can whip him with the chain while shouting DON’T TRUST ANYBODY. Ray says the Aces catchphrase and the team is still together. Yes, SERIOUSLY.

Back from a break with Bobby Roode coming up to the announce desk and promising to take Angle out tonight.

Ethan Carter III vs. Dewey Barnes

This is another rematch for Carter. Ethan runs him over to start and slams him face first into the mat out of a belly to back suplex. There’s a kick to the ribs but Dewey comes back with a dropkick in the corner and a neckbreaker but his missile dropkick misses. The Bulldog Driver (the 1 Percenter) ends Barnes at 2:25.

Joseph Park is eating candy corn in the back when Bad Influence shows up. Park says they’re bullying him while they suggest he’s Abyss. Richie Incognito and Jonathan Martin (NFL players currently involved in a bullying scandal) references are made until Eric Young comes in to make science jokes and set up a tag team match.

Bad Influence vs. Eric Young/Joseph Park

Eric gets double teamed to start but sends Bad Influence into each other. Park comes in for some work on the arm but it’s back to Young for an Ultimo Dragon headstand in the corner. Kaz is sent to the floor for a suicide dive from Eric and a cross body back inside gets two. Young is sent to the corner for a Flair Flip plus some strutting on the apron, only to have Kaz knock him out to the floor. Back inside and Bad Influence lays him out with Daniels getting two off a clothesline to the back of the head.

A Kaz distraction prevents the referee from seeing the hot tag to Park but Young ducks a clothesline, sending Bad Influence into each other again. Now the hot tag brings in Park and there’s a Boston Crab on Kaz. Daniels makes the save but everything breaks down. Daniels whips Young knees first into the steps before picking up the bell ringer’s hammer. That goes nowhere so he picks up the Appletini to blind Park, allowing Kaz to crucifix him for the pin at 4:38.

Rating: D. Just a match here for the most part with nothing significant happening at all. We’ve seen these teams fight several times now and nothing has really been accomplished as a result. The only interesting thing here is the difference in comedy. Young and Park have hammered their jokes so far into the ground that they haven’t been funny for months. Bad Influence on the other hand at least keeps their comedy moving, which keeps them feeling much fresher. It’s a nice breather.

Post break here’s Angle again, saying he’ll be out here if Roode wants a piece. Instead he gets Austin Aries who says he respects everything Angle has done, but if Angle doesn’t bring his best, he has no chance. Dixie pops up on screen and spins the Wheel of Dixie to make it a submission match next week. Aries says good luck and walks away but Roode comes in from behind to jump Angle and beat him down against the steps. Aries makes the save so Angle will be at 100% next week. That’s nice of him. Angle throws Aries to the side to get at Roode but so Aries goes after Kurt until security breaks it up.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Sabin

This is Full Metal Mayhem, which is TNA’s version of TLC but you win by pin or submission. Sabin is sent into a chair in the corner to knock him to the floor, allowing Hardy to hit a clothesline off the apron to take Chris down again. Sabin comes back with a ladder to the ribs as we head back inside for a rolling cutter onto the ladder for two on Hardy. Jeff comes back with a backdrop to send Sabin onto the ladder in the corner and blasts Sabin with a garbage can.

Jeff sets up a table in the corner but Sabin hurricanranas out of whatever Hardy was setting up. Hardy gets crotched on the top and is caught in the Tree of Woe so Sabin can rip at his EARS. That’s just painful looking. A baseball slide dropkick sends a chair into Hardy’s face and Sabin stands on his groin in the corner. Hardy is able to blast Sabin in the back with a chair despite hanging upside down in a nice counter.

Poetry in Motion connects in the corner and a clothesline sends Sabin out to the floor. Hardy lays him on a table and goes up top but misses a dive, crashing through the table as a result. Back in and Sabin puts Hardy on a table but his splash hits knees. It still drives Jeff through the table though so I’m not sure how much good it did him. Jeff scores with a quick Twist of Fate and sets up the ladder for a Swanton off the top to send him to the next round at 10:45.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what it was supposed to be. It wasn’t anything that set the bar any higher, but it was what they advertised it as: complete mayhem with both guys destroying each other and a huge spot to end it. I fear for Jeff’s ability to move when he’s 54 years old, but the entertainment is good while it lasts.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a much better show than what TNA has been throwing at us lately but it was far from perfect. I really liked the Angle vs. Roode stuff which made me feel like they wanted to kill each other. It would be better if they were meeting in the tournament, but there’s always the chance that they could cost one another their matches to set up a showdown somewhere in the future.

On the other hand, we have Aces and 8’s. That’s my problem with them: they’re still around. This group has been around nearly 18 months at this point and shouldn’t have made it half that long. I have no idea why this team is still around and I have no idea what TNA sees in them anymore. It’s Ray and two goons who have never accomplished anything on their own but we’re still supposed to care about them?

Overall the show was decent tonight but there was too much stuff that went nowhere, such as pretty much everything other than the main event and Angle vs. Roode. I liked tonight’s episode, but I have zero faith in TNA to make this last at all. Maybe it’ll be good for a few weeks, but long term planning is TNA’s Kryptonite. Actually scratch that as it would imply TNA is Superman. We’ll say it’s their……whatever the weakness is of Carrotman.

Results

Gail Kim vs. ODB vs. Brooke went to a no contest when Gail Kim interfered

Ethan Carter III b. Dewey Barnes – 1 Percenter

Bad Influence b. Joseph Park/Eric Young – Crucifix to Park

Jeff Hardy b. Chris Sabin – Swanton Bomb off the top of the ladder

 

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Impact Wrestling – October 31, 2013: Bound For Glory In An Impact Costume

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 31, 2013
Location: Maverik Center, Salt Lake City, Utah
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay

It’s Halloween night and the main story is the TNA World Champion left in a nice car last week, apparently not wanting to sign a contract and taking the title with him. Since this is TNA, you can see the brackets for the tournament being filled out as we speak. I’d assume we’re heading for a champion vs. champion match because that’s what WWE did a few years ago and if WWE can do it, TNA can as well, albeit with more mistakes and stupidity. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of AJ literally driving away from TNA and Dixie with the title in hand to end last week’s show.

Here’s Dixie to open the show, talking about how she served AJ the world up on a plate but he just walked away with his nose in the air. From here on out, AJ is no longer world champion and is just like everyone else that buys replica belts. The title is officially stripped and the car is a present to AJ for all his work.

Therefore, we need a new world champion so we’ll be holding an eight man tournament over the next few weeks for the vacant title. Seven of the entrants are former world champions, so here are James Storm, Samoa Joe, Kurt Angle, Jeff Hardy, Austin Aries, Bobby Roode and Chris Sabin. Everyone gets a video bio of their accomplishments. There’s a spot left so here’s Bully Ray to interrupt.

Before he can say anything though, Dixie announces a gauntlet match for the final tournament spot. Ray gets in the ring and says he’s been forgotten but the fans tell him he tapped out. He blames Earl Hebner and Ken Anderson for the losses, but the lights go out and here comes Anderson. Ken slowly stomps on Ray in the corner as we take a break.

During the break Anderson was taken away by security where Brooke yelled at her. Bully jumps him from behind and whips Anderson with the chain. He yells that Anderson is nothing without the club so stay out of club business.

Garrett Bischoff is asked what he thinks of this and says it’s club business. Knux comes up and says he needs Bischoff’s help in his match tonight.

Tag Titles: Bro Mans vs. James Storm/Gunner

The challengers jump the Bro Mans in the aisle before Gunner sends Robbie into the corner to start the official beating. A splash crushes Robbie and a slingshot suplex gets two. Off to Storm for a double back elbow and a knee drop to give James a two count. Jesse comes in and takes a big chop in the corner to mess with his blood vessels.

Back to Storm who gets two off a back elbow to the jaw followed by Storm getting the same via the Eye of the Storm. Things break down a bit with Gunner being sent out to the floor and Storm backdropping Jesse onto the back of his head. Robbie pulls his partner to the floor to avoid the Last Call before tripping up Storm on a suplex attempt and holding the foot down to give Jesse the pin at 4:15.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here but it’s good to have the Bro Mans get a win like this. They’re the kind of team that is going to have to cheat all the time to keep the belts and it’s just going to make the reaction even bigger when they lose the titles. I’m not wild on Storm and Gunner but they’re good enough for stuff like this.

Sting goes in to see Dixie who is willing to lift the ban on Sting getting a world title shot for tonight only. He can be in the gauntlet but has to start first. Sting leaves without saying yes or no.

We get a recap of Abyss returning last week, leading to Bad Influence dressed up as Sherlock Holmes and Watson. They promise to solve the Abyss mystery and unveil the monster tonight.

Norv Fernum vs. Ethan Carter III

Bernum is the guy Carter squashed at BFG and weighs about 104lbs. Carter tosses him around to start before putting on a standing chinlock. Fernum comes back with some flying shoulder blocks but can’t knock Carter down. Norv scores with a missile dropkick but walks into the bulldog driver (which might be called the 1%) for the pin at 3:10.

Rating: D. Yeah it was a squash, but I’m digging Carter’s character. The turnaround from his character in WWE is reminding me of Rick Rude when he jumped to WCW. In the WWF he was a glorified comedy guy but in WCW he was nothing short of a killer. Carter has gone from Derrick Bateman who was nothing to Carter who looks solid in the ring and has a great look. Well done TNA.

Bobby Roode asks the doctor how Angle can be cleared in just a week. He wants Angle checked again.

Bad Influence run into ODB and Eric, with the latter promising a surprise for them later.

Gauntlet Battle Royal

Sting starts out with Kazarian as this is over the top only with two minute time intervals. They start with a WOO off until Sting rams him into some top turnbuckles. A backdrop puts Kaz down and a suplex does the same. Kaz comes back with some shots to the ribs but can’t put him out in the corner. Knux is in at #3 and we take an early break. Back with Eric Young coming out and no eliminations so far. It’s been way more than two minutes since the break so screw the clock I guess.

Eric cleans house on the heels and pounds away in the corner as Sting gets back up. Kaz pulls at the beard to slow Eric down as Taz rips into Utah and all the wives the people around here have (his words not mine). Knux tries to put Eric out but he “pulls some of the pubic hair out” (again Tazz’s words) to escape. Christopher Daniels is #5 and saves Kaz before he even gets to the ring. Daniels comes in and pounds away on Eric as Bad Influence takes over. Sting suplexes both of them down and we take our second break in than eleven minutes since the opening bell.

Back with Manik in at #6. They’re clearly not doing anything during the break as the guys are in virtually the same positions as when the cameras went off. Manik cleans house and saves himself by headscissoring Kaz down. No eliminations so far and the ring fills up even more with Magnus at #7, the last entrant. Magnus cleans house but gets taken down by a cross body from Knux of all people. Manik escapes a pumphandle slam and catches Knux in a hurricanrana for the elimination.

Kaz hits a springboard elbow to eliminate Manik a few seconds later. Tazz says Aces and 8’s suck. Eric goes up but gets crotched down and kicked in the head by Kaz for an elimination. We’re down to Mafia vs. Bad Influence with Sting clotheslining Kaz down before Magnus hits a Snow Plow on Daniels. Sting gets his eyes raked so the double teaming of Magnus can begin, only to have the Mafia come right back with a clothesline to eliminate Kaz. Magnus sneaks up on Kaz and Sting with a double elimination for the win at 19:40. I’m pretty sure there was no extra action during the commercial though.

Rating: C-. This was pretty lame with just seven people and no real need for the match to go this long. Magnus winning the way he did extends his heel turn a bit more which is the right idea, but I can’t picture him winning the tournament to set up an eventual champion vs. champion match.

Angle has been advised to take the night off but will wrestle anyway.

Dixie has a surprise for us later: the Wheel of Dixie.

Knockouts Title: ODB vs. Gail Kim

ODB spears her down to start and pounds away on the champion in the corner. A splash sets up a Bronco Buster attempt but Gail bails to the floor. Gail loads up Eat Defeat on the floor but gets caught in a fallaway slam instead. ODB looks to go after Gail’s enforcer Lei’D Tapa but gets dropkicked into the announce table instead. There’s the Figure Four around the post as Tenay announces Turning Point for free on November 21.

Back in and Gail puts on a headscissor choke, only to have ODB counter into a half crab. Gail gets to the rope but a Thesz Press gets two for ODB. A front suplex out of the corner puts Gail down but Tapa distracts the referee. Gail grabs a rollup and a rope for the retaining pin at 6:25.

Rating: D+. I am so over the Knockouts as a whole. It’s the same five or so girls having the same feuds with the same dull stories (calling them stories is a stretch. It’s more like Knockout A is champion and Knockout B wins a contenders’ match) resolved in the same dull matches. Nothing to see here and ODB continues to get on my nerves.

Bad Influence has solved the mystery of Abyss.

Back from a break with Daniels and Kaz in the ring to explain their findings. With British accents, Daniels and Kaz say they’ve figured out the on again off again monster Abyss. Apparently it’s under the ring, which is certainly not a ripoff of when Santino dressed up like Sherlock Holmes and was told to solve the mystery of the Raw GM and it wound up being under the ring.

It’s a pumpkin under the ring though, which apparently has more brains than the entire Knockouts roster put together. This brings out Eric Young dressed as Joseph Park in a decent imitation. He has no proof that Halloween is a real holiday but it’s the big guy’s favorite holiday. Eric has a message for bad Influence so he punches them both, earning himself a beatdown. Abyss comes out for the save and crushes Bad Influence before helping Young up in the corner.

Here are the world title tournament brackets.

Hardy

Sabin

Roode

Storm

Angle

Aries

Magnus

Joe

As simple as this sounds, the wheel of Dixie will determine what the gimmick is for Sabin vs. Hardy. It’s Full Metal Mayhem, which is basically TLC.

Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode

This would be the third Bound For Glory rematch of the night. Roode was inducted into the EGO Hall of Fame to mock Angle, but since Angle declined the induction into the TNA Hall of Fame, the whole thing is kind of worthless now. Angle takes him into the corner to start but Roode bails to the floor to escape the ankle lock. Back in and Roode chops away but gets caught in a belly to belly. Roode bails to the floor again and has to rake Angle’s eyes to break up another suplex.

Back from a break with Roode working on the ribs with an abdominal stretch. Angle escapes and puts on Rolling Germans, getting up to about five of them this time. Roode fights up but has to escape the ankle lock. There’s the Crossface but Kurt tries to grab the ankle lock to counter. Roode rolls back and puts the hold on again, only to have to let go to escape a cradle and get it on for a third time. Angle rolls backwards again and puts on the Angle Slam for two but his shoulder is almost gone.

There’s the ankle lock but Roode rolls through into a cradle for tow. Roode comes back with an AA into a neckbreaker for a close two as this starts getting better. Angle gets the ankle lock again with the grapevine but Roode is too close to the ropes. Roode goes up but Angle runs up the ropes for the big Angle Slam for two. Angle stops moving and the match is stopped at 16:23.

Rating: B. Good match for the most part here until the storyline finish, which was again, THE SAME THING WE SAW AT BFG. Is this company really that creatively bankrupt that they can’t come up with something else? Like Roode dropping him in the fisherman’s suplex and Angle being knocked out that way? ANYTHING else? Good match until the ending though.

Angle is shaking badly to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The show wasn’t bad tonight but it was yet another rehash of Bound For Glory with over half the matches being rematches from the PPV. The tournament will help things out but they need something new to light a fire under this company. Maybe the changes behind the scenes will help out but they rarely have before. Not a bad show this week but nothing that set the world on fire.

Results

Bro Mans b. Gunner/James Storm – Suplex reversal to Storm

Ethan Carter III b. Norv Fernum – Bulldog driver

Magnus won a gauntlet battle royal last elimination Sting and Kazarian

Gail Kim b. ODB – Rollup

Bobby Roode b. Kurt Angle via referee stoppage

 

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On This Day: October 25, 2012 – Impact Wrestling: Even This Is Better Than Today’s Impact

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 25, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Todd Kenely, Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s Championship Night or whatever the latest gimmick show these guys have going on is called. I’m not a big fan of having I think three title matches less than two weeks after BFG, but since the shows themselves aren’t worth watching, they need a gimmick to draw in fans. There’s a world title match tonight with an opponent for Hardy to be announced. Let’s get to it.

We open with Hogan and Hardy in the back. Hogan is picking Hardy’s first challenger tonight and Hardy is ready for anyone. Hardy leaves and we get a really stupid voiceover from Hardy, talking about all of his potential opponents. He doesn’t care who he faces here.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion

We’ve got split announcers tonight, with Kenely (not sure who he is) and JB doing the first hour and the usual boys doing the second. Ion tries a quick rollup for two but it’s a standoff. Rob gets a gorilla press of all thigns and a pair of moonsaults for two. Ion heads to the floor and Rob is sent into the barricade when he follows. Ion charges into a kick in the ring but Rob misses a dive to the floor. Zema hits a flip dive over the top to take the champ out. Back in and Ion misses a majorly flippy dive so Rob kicks him in the face and hits Rolling Thunder for no cover. The Five Star retains the title at 4:33.

Rating: C-. Van Dam is a good pick for the title because you’re going to get at least a watchable match out of him and a win over him will mean something. Thankfully this should get him past Ion who was champion because….I’m not sure why he was champion, but it might be because he’s still around when everyone else from the X-Division revival

As Van Dam celebrates, Matt Morgan takes his head off with the Carbon Footprint. Joey Ryan has the X Title and poses with it. Morgan says this is what Hogan wanted.

Austin Aries is listening to the people trying to get the title match. The options are Angle, Anderson, Storm and Ray. Aries gets a shot anyway so he doesn’t care. We get some good jabs at Hogan’s “acting” and Aries says he’s going to use these guys for his personal amusement once they’re eliminated.

Here are Daniels and Kaz who don’t like the lack of tricks they’ve been getting for all the tricks they’ve been through. Daniels was left alone last week because Hogan screwed with Kaz’s travel. Kaz thinks the new champions are here in this country illegally. Daniels takes the mic from him and says that it’s not really Championship Thursday is it Suburban Commando? It’s a crime that everyone else is getting a shot but not them.

Daniels accuses Dixie of pandering to a Latino audience and says they should wear sombreros and drink tequila. Maybe they should call themselves Dos Stereotipicos. Daniels has a petition to get another title match. Well that’s better than the auto rematch clause. Cue the champions who say they’ll help with the petition. Hernandez has his title wrapped a chain around his neck. The brawl is on and the champs clear the ring in about a second. I think we have a rematch made. Kaz: “GIVE ME THAT CLIPBOARD BACK! THAT’S AN EXPENSIVE PEN!”

Hogan eliminates Anderson for nothing having enough fire. Aries tries to interview him. “Was it not taking enough vitamins? Not saying enough BROTHERS?” Aries says Anderson would be an easy opponent than him and throws a drink in Anderson’s face. The fight is on and Aries is down off a WICKED PAPER POSTER SHOT TO THE HEAD! A match is made and Anderson laughs. Then, to further the stupidity, we hear the director yell CUT. I mean…..really?

D-Von is with Aces and 8’s. The President has said no masks can come off. There are some women here to entertain them apparently, but first they have to take someone out. A member throws a dart at a bunch of pictures of wrestlers but we don’t see who it hit.

TV Title: Robbie T vs. Samoa Joe

Geez enough with the Robs getting title shots! Joe pounds away in the corner to start but T comes back with a spin kick to take him down. Joe puts on the Clutch and after a meaningless Robbie E distraction, Joe puts the hold on again while jumping on T’s back. Terry falls back on him but in an AWESOME moment, Joe sits up and with an INSANE look on his face, puts the hold back on and gets the tap at 2:28. Look up that ending. It looked great.

We recap Tara taking the title from Tessmacher along with Jesse from Big Brother. Did I mention I can’t stand reality TV?

Back to Hogan’s office and Ray apparently isn’t focused enough. He’s going to find D-Von and take care of him, basically eliminating himself.

Anderson yells at a guy in a headset and apparently it’s Anderson vs. Aries next. I know this because the announcer said it’s Anderson vs. Aries next.

Mr. Anderson vs. Austin Aries

They start immediately and Anderson yells mean things at Austin. Anderson takes his shirt off as Aries chills on the floor. A fireman’s carry goes nowhere and things slow down. Aries puts brass knuckles in Anderson’s tights but the referee takes them away. That was kind of odd. The fans chant cheater and Anderson pounds him into the corner again. Anderson gets sent to the floor and there’s the suicide dive as we take a break.

Back with Aries still in control but the fans are cheering for the cheater now. Anderson tries to fight back with some elbows and a clothesline that spins Aries inside out. Anderson’s spinning neckbreaker takes Aries down but the Regal Roll is countered again. The double rotation kick sends Aries to the floor and Anderson adds a plancha.

The fireman’s carry is loaded up again but Aries takes out the referee. Aries steals the knuckles from Aries and Anderson gets them. The referee takes them away and Aries knocks him cold with another pair. Aries pulls Anderson on top of him to feign a pin attempt before putting on the Last Chancery for the pin at 11:49.

Rating: C-. This was an awkward match, likely because Anderson is so unorthodox in the ring. Not a horrible match but it was missing by a half beat. Aries is doing some cool stuff and I like him way better as a heel. I like Anderson way better off my TV, but I guess he’s better in this role than another, but it’s not like it’s a great improvement.

Brooke and Tara/Jesse do their usual stuff. Brooke tells Jesse that ODB has an eye on him. Isn’t ODB married?

Tenay and Taz take over in what is supposed to be a big deal I think. We recap the show up to this point.

Knockouts Title: Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

Tara is defending and gets jumped before she can get in the ring. After more of a beating, a Jesse distraction lets Tara take over with some cheap shots. Tara slams Tessmacher’s face into the mat a few times but stops for a kiss. From Jesse unfortunately. More kissing occurs and Tara misses her slingshot somersault legdrop. Tessmacher comes back and hits her Stinkface before hitting an X Factor out of the corner. Tara grabs Terrell and Jesse lowbridges Tessmacher. Widow’s Peak retains the title at 3:57.

Rating: D+. Annoying non-celebrity aside, Tessmacher contines to do nothing at all for me. She’s just there and is exactly the same character she was a year ago. Also she’s just not that good in the ring, period. Her looks are great but mix up the outfits a bit already. Tara continues to be annoying with Jesse so it’s a success on that front. Hopefully this feud is done now.

Post match more making out occurs until Brooke comes out to shake her head. Apparently ODB is calling out Jesse next week on Open Fight Night.

Joseph Park goes in to talk to Hogan about fighting Aces and 8’s. Hogan says Park has had one match (he’s had two) and also he’s worried about Park’s liability. Park has a piece of paper. Hogan: “What’s that?” Park: “It’s a piece of paper.” He goes on to say it’s a letter of indemnification which means if he gets hurt fighting Aces and 8’s, it’s no one’s fault but Park’s and there’s no legal responsibility for anyone else.

Here’s Ray who again thanks Sting for letting him be his partner. Not much shocks Ray anymore, but the D-Von reveal did. Ray wants an explanation from D-Von but gets the whole group instead. They get in the ring and D-Von says they’re not friends or a team or anything anymore. D-Von says this has nothing to do with Ray anymore and it’s all about Hogan. Apparently this is because Hogan said that he wanted D-Von re-signed to the company, but Hogan and Dixie never called. In other words, if you don’t follow TNA online and follow Hogan on Twitter, this whole story makes VERY little sense.

D-Von says it’s over but Ray says it’s over when he says it’s over. Ray says D-Von is lying and he talks about the Guns coming back from 3D like two years ago and how they should have retired as champions. Years ago D-Von said they’re rich so screw the fans. D-Von says yeah he said it, so Ray wants to fight one on one right now. D-Von says it’s on his time but Ray says he’ll call him out next week on Open Fight Night.

Ryan says he wants the X Title and Morgan says Hogan started this.

It’s also Gut Check next week. The wrestler is Christian York. He wrestled on the first TNA show and in ECW.

Hogan says he’s got something big planned for Storm in the future but tonight Angle has the title shot.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Hardy

Jeff has two belts here: the vanity belt around his waist and the real one over his shoulder. We get some big match intros and we’re ready to go. Jeff takes him down with an armbar followed by the slingshot dropkick in the corner. Jeff goes to the corner but gets shoved out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Hardy escaping a chinlock and they clothesline each other.

Hardy starts speeding things up and kicks Angle to the floor. There’s a big clothesline off the apron and back inside for Whisper in the Wind for two. Angle comes back with Rolling Germans for two. The Slam is countered into the Twisting Stunner for no cover. Hardy goes up for the Swanton but Angle throws him off the top for two. Angle busts out a powerbomb for two and puts on a quick ankle lock, but Jeff kicks him off. The same kick puts Angle down but the Swanton misses.

The Angle Slam gets two so Jeff hits two straight Twists and the Swanton for just two. Jeff charges at Kurt and gets backdropped to the floor. Angle is spitting up blood. There go the straps as Hardy is thrown back in. Another Slam is countered into a rollup for the pin at 14:29 to keep the belt on Hardy.

Rating: B. When you need a solid match, call Kurt Angle. He’s great in spots like this where you need a main event and have no one else to throw in there. His resume is good enough to buy as a challenger no matter what he’s been doing lately. Either way, good stuff here and a very solid TV main event.

Post match Aries jumps Hardy and says the rematch is at Turning Point. Aries is so confident he’ll win that he takes the belt with him. The original, not the stupid one.

We cut to the back to see Angle getting destroyed by Aces and 8’s to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I liked the show, but man alive was it exhausting. There’s WAY too much stuff going on here between all of the title matches and the backstage stuff and the reality show stuff with Hogan and it’s all just too much. TNA is the opposite of WWE in that respect as while WWE has too much time on their hands, TNA doesn’t have enough and you get shows like this where there’s so much stuff going on that you can’t get a chance to breathe.

Still though, this was WAY better than last week and I feel better about where they’re going now. One more note: slow down on the gimmick shows. We’re going from Championship Thursday to Open Fight Night next week. Space them out or cut one. Back to back is too much, and there’s likely another gimmick that I can’t think of.

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Zema Ion – Five Star Frog Splash

Samoa Joe b. Robbie T – Koquina Clutch

Austin Aries b. Mr. Anderson – Last Chancery

Tara b. Miss Tessmacher – Widow’s Peak

Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle – Swanton Bomb

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Impact Wrestling – October 24, 2013: The 17 People That Liked Bound For Glory Will Be Thrilled

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 24, 2013
Location: Maverik Center, Salt Lake City, Utah
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Bound For Glory has come and gone, boring the hundreds and hundreds of people who bought it and the dozens who actually attended. The main development is AJ Styles defeated Bully Ray to win the world title. Actually every title changed hands at the show, with the Bro Mans, Gail Kim and Chris Sabin all taking home gold. This is kind of the beginning of a new year for TNA so hopefully they can come up with something better than what we’ve been seeing lately. Let’s get to it.

The opening video recaps the events of Bound For Glory, including all the title changes and Kurt Angle declining the induction into the Hall of Fame.

AJ vs. Ray II for the title tonight.

Here’s a very happy Dixie Carter to open things up. There’s a big set in the ring with AJ shirts and merchandise and a big WELCOME BACK AJ STYLES banner. Dixie gets Vickie Guerrero style heat as she says that she made a mistake recently and this is her apology. She always looks to the future and sucks up to Styles for a few minutes, talking about how he’s a legend and her world champion. Dixie introduces AJ and here’s the new champion.

Dixie keeps sucking up to AJ and talks about the slump he’s been in for several months now. She’s ready to pay though so it’s all good. Tonight AJ gets a fancy private dressing room which is almost as nice as Dixie’s. It comes complete with fillet mignon, caviar and champagne. Dixie shows off a watch for AJ which is apparently off of Craigslist. There’s one thing left though: a black sports car which AJ can drive with his new long hair flowing in the wind.

AJ talks about all the stuff Dixie has but still won’t join Team Dixie. First of all he’s a truck guy so the car doesn’t do much for him. He won’t separate himself from the boys that built this company. This mess could have been settled months ago when Dixie bet against him and lost. Dixie offers to cancel the rematch tonight with she and AJ going on a trip on her private jet instead. This brings out Bully and Brooke to protest after a break.

Bully doesn’t like the idea of the title match being canceled but AJ cuts him off. He definitely isn’t taking that trip to Dixieland and doesn’t think the whole rematch idea applies to wrestlers with no contract. However, he’s here in Salt Lake City to defend the title so it’s on. Bully calls AJ’s title win lucky because there was no way AJ can beat him clean.

Ray says that he kicked out of the Spiral Tap but Earl Hebner didn’t call it for some reason. Apparently God is a bully too and if he’s a bully, he’s Bully Ray. AJ says Aces and 8’s, all three of them, won’t be able to beat him tonight and he’ll be celebrating in the crowd with his fans tonight. He says they’ll know what his name is, so Ray drops him with one punch and beats on AJ with part of the set. Ray loads up a powerbomb through the table but here’s the returning Anderson for the save. Anderson beats on Bully in the corner and sends him running away.

After another break Anderson is still in the ring and says he really missed all the fans. They didn’t seem to miss him but he wants to know if Ray missed him as well. The fans don’t quite think so but Anderson spins his head around to show how good his neck feels. Anderson talks about being gone for so long and how tired he’s getting of everything, much like the agents in the back and the fans here tonight. It’s really gotten that bad in the five weeks he’s been gone?

The fans chant YES and here’s Dixie with a bunch of security to arrest Anderson. Anderson: “You’re into handcuffs?” He talks about getting arrested several times but thinks we should have some fun with it this time. Anderson punches two security guards (who are nice enough to sell for him) until voluntarily being taken away in the cuffs.

Video on the Knockouts Title match from BFG which saw Lei’D Tapa reveal an alliance with Gail Kim to win her the title.

Brooke/Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky/ODB

ODB pulls Brooke in to start and hits a quick Bronco Buster, sending Brooke out to the floor. She pulls ODB to the floor and stomps away a bit before sending ODB back in for more of the same from Gail. The champ quickly leaves and it’s back to Brooke for more forearms and stomping. ODB shoves Brooke off the middle rope and it’s hot tag to Velvet. She cleans a few rooms of the house with a flying headscissors and a running neckbreaker as everything breaks down. Everyone heads to the floor and it’s Tapa sneaking in to kick Velvet in the face to give Gail the pin at 3:35.

Rating: D-. And most of that is because of how good Brooke looks in her new outfit. Tapa can’t even do a big boot properly as she hit more of the shoulder instead of Velvet’s head. Gail as Knockouts Champion is nothing new, which is the continued problem with the entire division: it needs some fresh faces. Tapa simply isn’t going to work in that regard based on what we’ve seen so far.

The Bro Mans celebrate their tag title win by spraying their hair.

Ethan Carter III vs. Dewey Barnes

Dewey is another jobber, this time from Muscle Shoals, Alabama, home of Cody Deaner if I remember correctly. Carter takes him to the mat with ease and pounds away in the corner. Dewey comes back with a few shots to the face and a missile dropkick, only to be caught in the bulldog driver for the pin at 2:38. Same match he had at Bound For Glory.

Post match Ethan says he’s a Carter so the world needs him.

We recap Magnus beating Sting on Sunday.

Magnus is with Sting in the back and says he didn’t show Sting the right amount of respect. Sting is wondering if he passed the torch or lit a new fire under Magnus. They shake hands and everything seems cool.

We get a video from the Hall of Fame induction dinner, Angle declining the Hall of Fame induction and Angle vs. Roode.

Here’s Angle with something to say. He talks about how great it was to hear people praise him at the dinner, but he couldn’t accept the induction at BFG. One day though, he’ll have proven himself worthy of the spot which he’ll then accept. As for the match, it took a toll on his body and yes he knocked himself out on the last move, but here’s Roode to interrupt before Kurt can go any further.

Roode talks about evening the score from two years ago when Angle beat him in the main event of Bound For Glory 2011. He’s lived with that feeling of failure for two years but now it’s Kurt’s turn to feel the exact same thing. On Sunday, the It Factor beat the Olympic gold medalist. Angle says Roode is a bad man but he’s not better than Kurt. Angle wants a rematch RIGHT NOW but Roode hands him a paper instead. Apparently Kurt has torn knee cartilage and isn’t cleared to wrestle, but Kurt says he’s cleared to fight. The brawl only lasts for a few seconds before security breaks it up.

Bully tells Bischoff and Knux to make sure Anderson doesn’t make bail.

Dixie is on the phone in her office and says she needed something done yesterday.

It’s time for the Bro Mans’ celebration of being the new tag champions. They have punch, shrimp, confetti and a DJ. Robbie thinks this is a great party and declares Sunday the biggest night in Bro Man history. The fans think the new champions can’t wrestle but here are Storm and Gunner before the party goes on too long. Storm says this is a party and starts drinking the champagne while gunner eats the protein bars.

The fight is about to start but here’s Bad Influence to object. Kaz says they need to become three time tag team champions but Daniels wants to talk about the kind of beverages at this party. Beer is the drink of the lower class, champagne is for posers and the drink of a man is an appletini. Storm steals the drink and Gunner throws it in Daniels’ face, triggering the brawl. Cue Part and Young to join the brawl, but Daniels makes the mistake of shattering a bottle over Park’s head, drawing blood. Park chases off the bad guys and the good guys get to stand tall.

Angle vs. Roode next week. How TNA can be sure Angle can be cleared that fast isn’t really clear but at least they’ve got the right idea.

TNA World Title: Bully Ray vs. AJ Styles

They have a ton of time here with nearly half an hour left in the show. AJ has heavily taped up ribs. Bully interrupts the big match intros so AJ punches him in the face to get things going. The champion scores with his drop down into the dropkick sequence and gets two off a kick to the head. Bully starts thinking and lifts Styles into the air to drop him ribs first down onto the mat as we take a break.

Back with Ray mocking Hogan and easily stopping an AJ comeback by going to the ribs. A big backdrop puts AJ down again but he comes back with some shots to the head. Ray sends him to the apron but Styles scores with the springboard forearm for two. AJ foolishly tries a fireman’s carry and gets caught in a Samoan drop for two. Ray misses the middle rope backsplash but AJ misses the springboard 450 to hurt the ribs even worse.

AJ is loaded up onto the ropes but he shoves Ray back, right into the referee. Styles grabs the Calf Killer for the tap out but there’s no referee. Ray hits a chain shot to the throat and the Bully Cutter is good for two. Ray gets the chain again but the referee is starting to get back into it. Cue Anderson to snap Ray’s throat across the ropes, allowing AJ to get a crucifix for the pin at 13:28.

Rating: C+. I liked this better than Bound For Glory because it wasn’t so insane and told a better story, but did anyone not know Anderson was coming back? It’s good to give Ray a new feud and as long as it gets him away from the Aces and 8’s schtick he’ll be in much better shape. Not a great match here but it worked well enough.

Post match Anderson and Ray get pulled apart. Dixie pops up on screen with a contract for Styles, telling him not to go anywhere. After the break here’s Carter with the contract and a speech ready of course. She offers AJ the contract and reminds AJ how sweet she is. The car is a signing bonus for Styles for date nights with his wife.

AJ says it’s a great contract from a horrible human being who uses wrestlers like him to pad their bank account and buy themselves fancy cars. Styles rips up the contract and says it wasn’t about the money but rather about the respect. Dixie is going to pay by having AJ take the title and leaving with it. He’s taking the title with him to the people who deserve a champion. Oh and he’s taking the car too. Styles walks to the back and heads to the car which is already running despite him having the key. He drives off to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. TNA needed to hit a home run tonight to make up for Bound For Glory but instead we got a decent single. This more or less did nothing new as everything seems focused on Bound For Glory rematches in the coming weeks. That’s a major problem when almost everything you had for BFG wasn’t well received. This show was a lot of nothing with WAY too many recaps and nowhere near enough action. Where was the X-Division? You know, that thing that sucked up most of the midcard talent for the PPV? TNA needs something fresh and they need it in a hurry. This wasn’t a horrible show, but it didn’t help things.

Results

Brooke/Gail Kim b. Velvet Sky/ODB – Kim pinned Sky after a big boot from Lei’D Tapa

Ethan Carter III b. Dewey Barnes – Bulldog driver

AJ Styles b. Bully Ray – Crucifix

 

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Impact Wrestling – October 17, 2013: Sunday Is Coming If Anyone Cares

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 17, 2013
Location: Cox Business Arena, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s the go home show for Bound for Glory and the card is almost entirely set. The focus of the show will likely be just polishing everything up and giving us the hard push to Sunday. Odds are we’ll also get some development on the Dixie Is Evil story which seems to be where we’re headed after the big show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s events with Angle returning and Sting angering Magnus by getting the pin in their tag match.

Here’s Dixie to open the show, flanked by two goons with one carrying a briefcase. She talks about being an artist like Michelangelo but she has to deal with a redneck like AJ Styles slinging paint everywhere. This coming Sunday is going to be her masterpiece but she what if AJ doesn’t make it there? The fans chant WE WANT HOGAN as Dixie offers a $50,000 bounty to anyone that can keep AJ out of the main event of Bound For Glory.

This brings out Bully and Brooke with Bully saying that he took out AJ last week so he’d be glad to do it again for the $50,000 (clearly fake money in the briefcase). Cue Magnus to say that 12 men over 3 months fought for a chance to be the #1 contender, but now the title shot might go to whomever takes out AJ Styles tonight.

Magnus starts a Dixie Sucks chant and says that $50,000 is a lot of money to him, but he’ll fight Bully Ray right here tonight for free. Ray praises Magnus and says that Sting believes in him, but Magnus hasn’t proven himself yet. He’s a disappointment, just like everyone else in Oklahoma. Magnus drops him with one punch and Ray bails to the floor. The match is on for later tonight.

Ray gives Bischoff and Knux a pep talk. Things seem to be ok and if Knux needs Ray’s help in his match with Gunner tonight, just throw up the signal.

Christopher Daniels vs. Robbie E. vs. Hernandez vs. Eric Young

The winner of this gets the final spot for his team in the gauntlet match on the preshow with the winning team getting a title shot at the PPV. Robbie and Young get us going but Young tags in Hernandez for the slingshot shoulder to E. Robbie brings in Daniels who has to escape the over the shoulder backbreaker but gets caught in the choke suplex for two. A cheap shot from Robbie takes Hernandez to the floor before he comes in legally and gets two off a middle rope elbow.

SuperMex comes back with a double clothesline to take down Daniels and Robbie, allowing for the tag off to Eric. Daniels and Robbie get in an argument (despite not being a team), allowing Hernandez to do the running clothesline from the ramp. Hernandez misses a splash in the corner and falls out to the floor before Eric suplexes Daniels down. Robbie makes a blind tag in and pins Daniels off the top rope elbow from Young at 5:18.

Rating: D+. This might as well have been a tag match until the ending which is about all you can expect out of something like this. Odds are we’re getting Chavo and Hernandez vs. Gunner/Storm because that’s the least interesting match out of the options available. Nothing match but it wasn’t too bad.

AJ fights off Jesse Godderz.

Here’s AJ to the ring with something to say. He talks about Dixie being desperate by sending everyone after him because she knows he’s winning at Bound For Glory. She’ll pay after the PPV but tonight, he isn’t running and hiding so come get paid. This brings out Knux and Bischoff but AJ jumps them as they come in. This brings out James Storm and Gunner to clear the ring with Storm staring AJ down but letting him go.

Gunner vs. Knux

Bischoff immediately grabs Gunner’s leg to give Knux the early advantage. Gunner comes back with a hard clothesline and pounds away, only to be sent into the middle buckle to stop him cold. Another clothesline puts Gunner down before Knux drives him into the corner. Gunner finally slams him into the corner before a double clothesline puts both guys down. Storm spits beer in Bischoff’s face as Gunner makes his comeback and hits a decent fallaway slam on the big Knux. He can’t hook the Gun Rack so Knux gets two off a cross body of all things. Knux calls for Bully, allowing Gunner to spear him down for the pin at 5:03.

Rating: C-. Knux looked decent here, but why aren’t Knux and Bischoff at least in the gauntlet match on Sunday? It would at least give them something to do and add to the match a bit. A four team gauntlet isn’t much to see but it could be worse I guess. As long as Gunner doesn’t become the 194th wrestler to use the spear I’ll be ok with him.

Chris Sabin is going for the bounty.

Knux and Bischoff want to know where Bully was. It’s going to be interesting the next time he wants their help.

We recap Lei’D Tapa’s attacks on the Knockouts.

Gail Kim suggests an alliance with Brooke to take care of Tapa but she’s not interested.

Video on the Ultimate X match.

Sabin asks a security guard if he’s seen the not-so-Phenomenal AJ Styles but finds Joe instead. Joe threatens him with violence both tonight and Sunday so Sabin backs away.

Chris Sabin vs. Samoa Joe

Joe takes him into the corner to start but gets poked in the eye to slow him down. A flurry of punches take Sabin down in turn and there’s a running elbow into the standing enziguri. Sabin bails to the floor to avoid the running boot in the corner before firing off chops and punches with Joe selling nothing at all.

Sabin tries to bail but Joe grabs him on the ramp, only to have Chris slam him onto the steel. Joe dives back in to beat the count at nine and catches a charging Sabin in a release Rock Bottom out of the corner. A boot to the chest and the backsplash gets two for Joe but Sabin comes back with a springboard tornado DDT for two. Not that it matters as Joe grabs a quick Koquina Clutch for the win at 5:17.

Rating: C. Nice match here to preview the big title match on Sunday but a bit more high flying would have helped. Granted these aren’t the best choices for flying given that Sabin is a heel and that Joe is fat, but it wasn’t a bad match at all. Sabin is rocking the heel character so at least his world title reign was only mostly worthless.

Post match Aries, Hardy and Manik come in for a big brawl. Hardy pulls in a ladder, allowing Manik to dive onto Aries and Sabin.

Bad Influence goes after AJ but he holds them off with a fire extinguisher.

Ethan Carter III debuts at Bound For Glory.

Bully Ray vs. Magnus

Non-title of course. Feeling out process to start with Magnus grabbing a headlock for early control. Ray shoves him away but gets clotheslined, allowing Magnus to go up top and get crotched as we take a break. Back with Ray throwing Magnus down and posing a lot before missing a big elbow drop. They’re going very lightly here so far.

Magnus wins a quick slugout and clotheslines Bully down to speed things up a bit. A big boot puts Ray down and the top rope elbow gets two. Magnus charges into the referee by mistake so Ray gets the chain, drawing out Sting for the save. The referee throws Sting out, allowing Ray to low blow Magnus for the pin at 10:42.

Rating: D. This was really boring stuff and the ending was never in doubt. Obviously you can’t put anyone over the world champion three days before the biggest show of the year but it did advance the Sting vs. Magnus story a bit more. I’m guessing they were going slowly to avoid any injuries for Sunday, which is a constant problem with go home shows.

Magnus isn’t pleased with Sting but they don’t come to blows.

Post break Magnus yells at Sting for getting in his business. Sting says he’ll be alone on Sunday.

We run down the BFG card.

Here’s Angle with his first comments since being back. Kurt says it’s good to be home before talking about Bobby Roode being great. He even reminds Angle of himself about five years ago. However, Roode is just one of the great ones at the moment rather than being one of the best of all time. When Roode starts messing with Angle’s legacy, that makes it personal. This brings out Roode to says he’s ok with not being Kurt Angle. Roode says he wanted to be Kurt Angle years ago but now, Angle hasn’t done anything at all.

The only thing Roode remembers Angle doing recently was beating Roode two years ago at Bound For Glory. That was Roode’s wakeup call and the reason he won the world title which he held longer than anyone, including Angle. Roode says he’ll win on Sunday but Angle says he’ll make Roode tap. Roode sucker punches Kurt and here’s the rest of EGO to send Angle shoulder first into the post. Angle gets put in the Crossface to damage his shoulder even worse.

Here are Dixie, AJ and Ray for the contract signing. Ray signs and says he’ll keep it simple: AJ can’t beat him no matter what he does on Sunday. He talks about Flair vs. Rhodes from 1985 and the Hard Times that Dusty talked about Flair putting wrestling through. Ray has put wrestling through hard times over the last year by getting rid of Sting, Sabin and Hogan. Ray is going to put AJ on hard times and send him back to the trailer park in Georgia, where AJ’s family probably won’t be waiting. He’s the Darth Vader of professional wrestling and AJ isn’t Luke Skywalker.

AJ says he appreciates Ray’s story but he’s no Ric Flair and AJ is no Dusty Rhodes. This is the future instead of the past and Ray doesn’t deserve to compare himself to Bully Ray. AJ has to win on Sunday because he has nothing to lose. He has to win to make Dixie beg and take everything away from Bully Ray. AJ signs but Ray says he takes it back. He’s not putting the title on the line but he will take the $50,000 right now. Ray swings the chain but gets hit with the briefcase. AJ throws the money at Dixie and her security so a staredown can end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The show did a good job of selling what Bound For Glory has to offer, but the show really doesn’t have a flare to it. This Sunday’s show feels like any other show but it happens to be the biggest show of the year. Nothing on it feels really special and the big moment is going to be what? Hogan returning? After nearly four years of sitting through him, two weeks of no Hogan doesn’t make a return mean anything. Decent show tonight but it doesn’t change how I feel about Sunday at all.

Results

Robbie E. b. Eric Young, Hernandez and Christopher Daniels – Robbie pinned Daniels after a top rope elbow from Young

Gunner b. Knux – Spear

Samoa Joe b. Chris Sabin – Koquina Clutch

Bully Ray b. Magnus – Low blow

 

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