Monday Night Raw
Date: December 26, 2016
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s the city that keeps giving even after the holidays. We’re closing out the Monday Night Raw year in Chicago and unfortunately that doesn’t mean the Slammy Awards. With just under five weeks to go until the Royal Rumble, the big story is Braun Strowman invading the main event. That could result in some very interesting reactions from the Chicago crowd. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Strowman’s destruction last week.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Stephanie McMahon to open things up. She wishes us all happy holidays and says Mick Foley is off tonight due to his extreme work schedule as of late (possibly due to hip surgery). The fans cut her off with a CM Punk chant and she actually acknowledges it by saying if the fans could last two minutes and fifteen seconds, they would last a minute longer than Punk.

Cue Seth Rollins to say he wants HHH tonight but Stephanie says she isn’t her husband’s keeper. Rollins begs HHH to come down but says he’ll settle for Strowman. This brings out Roman Reigns to say he wants Strowman too. Since both guys are wanting to fight Strowman, Reigns thinks they should go back there and drag him out here for a Shield style beating.

Stephanie is really fired up by the idea and even suggests that Dean Ambrose could be here. She’s just kidding though because the Chicago fans are that easily manipulated. Instead, tonight we’ll have Seth vs. Strowman and Reigns vs. an opponent of Stephanie’s choosing.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

New Day is challenging with Big E. on the floor. Cesaro gets beaten down in a hurry with double middle rope elbows and a legdrop for two each. Woods is thrown out to the floor and comes up grabbing his knee as we take a break. Back with Woods diving through the ropes into a tornado DDT to plant Cesaro on the floor.

The hot tag brings Kofi in for the flip dive and a slightly botched counter into the SOS for two on Sheamus. Everything breaks down and Woods’ top rope elbow gets two on Sheamus with Cesaro making the save. The Swing goes on but Big E. gets on the apron for a distraction. That earns Kofi a gorilla press down onto the big man and a blind tag sets up the Brogue Kick to retain the titles at 10:11.

Rating: C+. This was the required rematch so Cesaro and Sheamus can move on to someone else. New Day is in the Edge and Christian position of having long since outgrown the tag division so it’s time to move on to a new endeavor. Unfortunately I’m not sure what that’s going to be but a strong Kofi singles run could be interesting.

Video on Brock Lesnar. Goldberg is back next week.

Strowman runs into Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens, who seem to have been looking for him. Owens thinks that Strowman is up next for the title after Reigns is dispatched so Strowman should focus on the Seth and Roman. Apparently Rollins and Reigns have been talking smack about Strowman and said his punches are like being hit with a pillow. Strowman doesn’t buy the rumors and seems to want to demolish the two of them.

Golden Truth is in the back talking about Scrooge when Bayley comes up to give Goldust a Bayley Bear dressed like Dusty Rhodes. Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows come in and RIP THE BEAR’S HEAD OFF.

Nia Jax vs. Scarlet

Scarlet is a jobber wearing a Sasha shirt so the destruction is over in 53 seconds off a Samoan drop.

Nia tells Scarlet to choose a better role model and drops the big leg.

Charlotte shakes Stephanie’s hand when Owens and Jericho come in to lodge an official complaint. Jericho doesn’t being spiders or being in shark cages. Is Foley going to put the spiders in the cage? It might give Jericho acne-arachna-phobia! They want to be face Reigns for the US Title tonight as punishment for Foley. Stephanie says she hates bosses who use their authority to advance some personal agenda (HAHA STEPHANIE IS SO IRONIC AND FUNNY!) so she gives Owens the title shot. Jericho doesn’t seem pleased but goes along with it.

Here’s Bayley for a chat. She’s so happy to be in Chicago because she’s the new #1 contender. This brings out Charlotte to show us the clip from last week where her shoulder was up at two. Since there was a problem, Stephanie has agreed to expunge the match from the record books. However, since Charlotte is feeling charitable, she’ll let Bayley have another chance to win right now. Oh and there’s going to be a guest referee: Dana Brooke.

Charlotte vs. Bayley

Dana won’t let Bayley go into the corner so Charlotte starts in with the chops. Bayley takes over and gets dragged off so Dana gets suplexed. Another referee runs in as Charlotte takes over in the corner with more chops. Bayley shrugs it off and grabs the Bayley to Belly but Dana pulls the referee out. Back in and Charlotte grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes, allowing Dana to count the pin at 3:39.

Rating: D. Just an angle here instead of a match and that’s fine. I’m not sure how we get to Bayley’s title match without Foley around, though of course there’s a chance that Stephanie will be all nice and happy and give Bayley the match anyway. Bayley is going to get over huge when she wins the title, if she isn’t there already.

Stephanie yells at Braun, who wants Sami Zayn in a last man standing match next week. The boss agrees, as long as Seth gets the same beating Sami will get.

We look back at Neville’s speech from last week, which is one of my favorite moments in a long time. He’s nailing the heel character at the moment and I’m hoping he annihilates Swann to take the title.

TJ Perkins vs. Neville

Austin Aries replaces Saxton on commentary. Neville won’t shake hands (as he shouldn’t) so Perkins knees Neville in the chest for two early on. A spinning kick sends Neville outside and a high crossbody gets two back inside. An AUSTIN ARIES chant starts up as Neville kicks TJ in the head to send him to the floor. Back in and we hit the chinlock for a bit before a double chickenwing into double knees to the chest gives TJ two. The Detonation Kick looks to set up the kneebar but Neville reverses into a rollup and grabs the tights for the pin at 4:58.

Rating: C-. Well that didn’t work quite as well as it had before. Neville really shouldn’t be giving up that much offense and it’s really annoying to see them possibly screwing up a great character this fast. I loved watching Neville in that tag match last week because he was eight steps ahead of everyone else but here he was just slightly better, which isn’t how to make the character work that well.

Neville yells about people making fun of his accent and face not being appropriate for Monday Night Raw. It’s American ignorance and arrogance that prevents them from appreciating him. Tomorrow night, Neville wants Rich Swann.

We look back at Enzo Amore getting destroyed by Jinder Mahal and Rusev at sensitivity training.

Here are Enzo and Cass with the former in a wheelchair (and of course it’s leopard skin). Enzo says the sensitivity class isn’t for him because he’s already gotten a degree in being a certified G (which means you can teach that). We get a long rant from Enzo about how his cup runeth over and he’s spilled his Haterade. Since he’s done that, the big man is hitting cleanup. Cass calls out Rusev but gets someone a bonus with Jinder Mahal. Enzo pops out of the chair and pulls Mahal off the apron, leaving Cass to clear the ring. The injured Enzo is thrown into Mahal and Cass stands very tall.

Shining Stars vs. Bo Dallas/Darren Young

This is over an incident on Facebook Live earlier today. And never mind as it’s Strowman time….and he’s got a Christmas tree. The beatdown is on and it’s officially a no contest at 1:04 (though it should be a DQ as he hit Dallas first).

Strowman destroys everyone, including Bob Backlund (though just by proxy).

Seth Rollins vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman throws him into the corner to start but Seth gets in a suicide dive on the floor. Back in and the enziguri and springboard knee to the head stagger the monster. A second knee has him even more wobbled but he pulls Seth out of the air on the third attempt. Seth actually drops him with a Blockbuster but the Pedigree is countered with a backdrop over the top. Braun runs him over again….and here’s Sami through the crowd to jump Strowman for the DQ at 3:34.

Rating: C. I would have had Strowman go over clean here but I can live with what they did. Rollins shouldn’t be squashed but he sold quite a bit for the monster, which is the best thing they could have done without having him get destroyed. Strowman didn’t lose though and that helps so much.

Post match Braun chases Sami to the back, leaving Rollins to take the Codebreaker from an invading Jericho.

Owens praises his best friend for getting rid of Rollins, leaving it one on one tonight.

Emmalina says the wait will be worth it but she’s still premiering soon.

Golden Truth vs. Anderson and Gallows

Goldust takes Anderson down in the corner to start but Gallows comes in to start the beating. Truth fights up and brings Goldust back in as everything breaks down. We actually get some fire from Goldust, who throws Anderson into the barricade. They head inside though and it’s Karl getting in a rollup for the pin at 3:34.

Rating: D-. Goldust can’t even get revenge for someone ripping his dad’s head off a teddy bear? I mean, they could have NOT BOOKED IT THAT WAY but how else would we get the third rollup finish of the night without it? Anderson and Gallows going after the belts is a good idea, albeit one we’ve seen for months now.

Rich Swann vs. Ariya Daivari

Non-title. Daivari takes him down to start but misses the early frog splash attempt. That means a double stomp to the back and the spinning kick to Daivari’s head for the pin at 1:22.

Post match Swann agrees to face Neville, who jumps the champ from behind.

Daivari calls Jack Gallagher a scoundrel so of course Gallagher is next to him. Jack challenges Daivari to a duel, SLAPS HIM WITH A GLOVE, and corrects Daviari’s American history by saying this makes Gallagher more like Aaron Burr.

Video on Lesnar vs. Goldberg from Survivor Series. I still don’t know why I would want to see them fight a third time.

US Title: Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is defending. Owens hides in the corner to start and gets knocked to the floor with a right hand. Back in and Owens starts to slowly hammer away but Reigns clotheslines him down. Cue Jericho for a distraction so Owens can score with a DDT. The backsplash gets two and we take an early break.

Back with Owens getting two off the Cannonball and we hit the chinlock. Owens: “ASK HIM!” Reigns fights up and gets in the apron kick, only to get caught with a Backstabber for two. It’s too early for the Pop Up Powerbomb though so Reigns grabs the sitout powerbomb for two.

The Superman Punch misses but the second attempt connects for two on Owens. Jericho offers a distraction though and Owens gets in a Codebreaker for two. This brings out Rollins to Pedigree Jericho on the floor but Owens superkicks Seth down. Back in and the spear ends Owens at 16:21.

Rating: C-. I’m actually starting to get a kick out of WWE trolling the fans so hard. They just had the World Champion get pinned as close to clean as a World Champion is going to get pinned by Reigns again and they did it in Chicago no less. As much as I can’t stand the booking, there’s something amazing about how much WWE is willing to screw the fans over for their own ambitions.

Post match Owens gets Pedigreed and Jericho gets speared to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t a horrible show but you could tell they weren’t putting in much of an effort on the tail end of a holiday weekend. The ending was rather annoying but it’s balanced out by Strowman being this unstoppable monster. I’m not sure where he’s going next but he’s already an entertaining part of the show. That being said, there’s really nothing that has me interested at the moment, though maybe that’s due to the end of the year and the rather awful main event scene.

Results

Cesaro/Sheamus b. New Day – Brogue Kick to Kingston

Nia Jax b. Scarlet – Samoan drop

Charlotte b. Bayley – Rollup with feet on the ropes

Neville b. TJ Perkins – Rollup with a handful of tights

Shining Stars vs. Bo Dallas/Darren Young went to a no contest when Braun Strowman interfered

Braun Strowman b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Sami Zayn interfered

Anderson and Gallows b. Golden Truth – Rollup to Goldust

Rich Swann b. Ariya Daivari – Kick to the head

Roman Reigns b. Kevin Owens – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 22, 2002
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re just over a month away from Summerslam but more importantly, HHH is now officially on Raw. I know it’s not the best sounding thing in the world but at this point, Raw is absolutely dying for star power and HHH gives them a top name. Booker T., Rob Van Dam and Ric Flair are big names but they’re not top level stars at this point, making HHH a necessary evil. Let’s get to it.

The intro sequence now ends with a closeup of Eric Bischoff’s face. There’s my nightmare fuel for the week.

Opening sequence.

Speaking of nightmares, here’s Bischoff to open things up, which likely means a very long speech. Bischoff actually gets right to the point by announcing the Rock for tonight. In what Eric seems to feel is a bigger announcement, here’s HHH to loud music that might be hiding a fairly uninterested pop.

Thankfully (I think?) HHH takes the mic away and introduces Shawn for the big, official reunion. We get a very audible DX chant as Bischoff officially names Shawn as HHH’s manager. Eric makes it very clear that Shawn is a step beneath HHH and that doesn’t seem cool with Michaels. He isn’t one to take ultimatums so he’s taking the highway out of here.

Bischoff says HHH needs to go talk some sense into his buddy because he doesn’t have many other options. HHH looks very annoyed as he goes after Shawn. We’re still not done though as Eric says right here tonight, we’re unifying the Intercontinental and European Titles in a ladder match. It’s about time that belt was taken behind the barn and shot.

In the back, Shawn is storming out when HHH catches up with him. Shawn has been here for fifteen years and he doesn’t like being told what to do. HHH basically begs him to drop the whole pride thing and not be like Steve Austin. Worry not of course, because HHH has an idea.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

Ladder match and technically the titles are already unified so Jeff is challenging coming in. They hit the mat to start with Van Dam scoring off a dropkick and going for a cover out of instinct. Jeff gets knocked out to the floor for a moonsault off the apron, allowing him to bring in the first ladder.

Both guys go up and both guys are knocked right back down, meaning they both need a ladder for a duel. The champ gets the better of it and hits the cartwheel moonsault onto Jeff onto the ladder. Something like a Russian legsweep off the ladder brings Van Dam back down, though I’m not sure why Jeff isn’t down as well.

A Swanton onto the ladder onto the champ keeps Hardy down a bit longer but he climbs up in another hurry. Van Dam runs the rungs as well though and hits a huge sunset powerbomb for a big crash (and a matching pop). It’s another climb on their own ladders with Rob kicking Jeff down and dropping a huge splash for a bonus. Van Dam easily pulls the belt down to retain with the ladder falling on Jeff’s head.

Rating: C+. This was as good of a ladder match as you were going to have with less than seven minutes for a ladder match. Above all else though, it’s a really good idea to get rid of the European Title. It hasn’t meant a thing in months (if not years) and it was just taking up space while devaluing the other titles. It was nice for a very short time but it was WAY past its expiration date.

Here’s Christopher Nowinski for a chat. After calling himself a Harvard graduate over and over, Nowinski is shut up by Undertaker. That means a huge beatdown from the former champion, who is officially a face it seems.

Eric Bischoff gives Rhyno a sales pitch and things seem intriguing. D’Lo Brown and Shawn Stasiak come up to ask for a match. Bischoff has a three minute hole in the show and he wants to be entertained. If they don’t do it, Bischoff will take care of the entertainment himself.

Trish Stratus/Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Molly Holly/William Regal

The genders don’t have to match here. Bubba is really banged up after his match last night but starts with Regal anyway. Molly comes in and shoves Bubba, who changes his mind about tagging Trish. That means the test of strength dance and a quick spank, followed by the tag off to Stratus. It’s off to Regal for some gentlemanly British violence until he tries to go after Bubba. That’s enough for the hot tag to Dudley and everything breaks down. Trish plays D-Von on What’s Up but Bubba won’t slap her chest for GET THE TABLES. While Bubba is on the floor, Regal puts Trish in the STF for the win.

Rating: D. Are they planning on going anywhere with this Bubba/Trish stuff? They’ve been teasing it for a good while now but it’s probably better that nothing actually comes of it. Regal and Molly are a bit better fit as their characters fit, especially with the natural heel chemistry they seem to have.

Bischoff tells someone that after three minutes (of Stasiak vs. Brown), they’re on. He turns the corner and runs into Chris Benoit, who will face Booker T. tonight. The winner gets Van Dam for the Intercontinental Title next week.

Here’s the Rock for his first address as champion. After thanking Undertaker and Angle for the match last night, Rock talks about telling Bischoff he would be here tonight with this title. Cue Eddie Guerrero of all people to interrupt and this should be good. Eddie isn’t cool with what Rock has been doing lately. See, the other night, Eddie was going to tuck his kids in and saw ROCK posters on their wall next to pictures of their dad. That earned them a lesson, so Eddie RIPPED THE POSTER UP AND BURNED IT!

Rock is aghast and thinks he’s no movie star. Eddie is though, but Rock isn’t sure if Eddie is Cheech or Chong. This sends Eddie into a rant about his haircut, which should be called the People’s Mullet. Rock: “You look like Billy Ray Cyrus had sex with a dumb hyena.” This sets up a match for later tonight and if Eddie wins, he gets a title shot. Rock accepts in song form and still wants to know if it’s Cheech or Chong. Outstanding stuff here with Eddie hanging with Rock step for step. As Rock is leaving, Brock Lesnar comes out for his match and it’s a Summerslam preview. Brock keeps walking and doesn’t even give Rock a glance.

Brock Lesnar vs. Tommy Dreamer

Singapore Cane match. Brock isn’t in a mood to play tonight as he suplexes Dreamer on the floor to start and whips him into the steps. They head inside for the first time with Brock hitting the triple backbreakers but getting kicked low, which shouldn’t be legal here. A DDT gives Tommy two but the cane is knocked away and the F5 finishes Tommy in a hurry. Total squash with Lesnar never using the cane.

Undertaker comes out and knocks Lesnar around with the cane.

Big Show tells Shawn that there’s no NWO to back him up anymore. You can hear a match going on in the background in a rare production error.

Shawn Stasiak vs. D’Lo Brown

Three minute time limit with Bischoff watching from the stage. Brown goes for some early near falls but walks into a powerslam as Bischoff says thirty seconds. Bischoff finally gets bored and counts down the clock after about a minute and a half. Cue two unnamed Samoans to maul both guys for the no contest. That would of course be Jamal and Rosey, soon to be known as 3 Minute Warning.

So to recap, this match had nothing to do with competition and was all about entertaining Bischoff. Well done indeed.

HHH gives Shawn a bag containing something to wear. Shawn seems intrigued.

Goldust congratulates Booker for beating Big Show last night and gives him a Don King wig for being King of the Giant Killers. Booker actually gets into the impression to talk about his match with Benoit.

Booker T. vs. Chris Benoit

Winner gets a match with Van Dam next week and Booker has bad ribs coming in. Benoit works on the arm to start and gets knocked into the corner for his efforts. Some chops and a backbreaker have Booker in trouble and Benoit whips him hard into the buckle. Now that’s the kind of intelligence you expect from Chris.

Booker’s sleeper is quickly broken up with a belly to back suplex and Benoit unhooks a middle turnbuckle pad. A spinebuster plants the Canadian and a missile dropkick gets two as they’re certainly moving out there. Benoit has had enough of this and starts rolling the German suplexes to damage Booker’s ribs even more. Booker is finally sent into the buckle (which Nick Patrick can see) and the Crossface sends Benoit to the title match.

Rating: B. Bad refereeing at the end aside, this was a heck of a match with Benoit taking Booker apart thanks to the injury and destroying him like only Chris can. Booker looked fine in defeat as he came in injured and Benoit cheated to win on top of that. If nothing else, this makes up for Benoit jobbing to the Dudleyz last night. Well done all around.

Big Show vs. Spike Dudley

Bischoff is on commentary now. Chokeslam wraps Spike up in about a minute.

Show loads up a table and puts the invading Bubba through it along with his brother. Bischoff is very pleased with these results.

And now, D-Generation X. Shawn talks about being rebels before being a rebel was cool and HHH loads up the ARE YOU READY. As soon as he’s about to tell us to suck it though, HHH Pedigrees Shawn to turn full heel, which would be the case for several years to come.

After a break, HHH drives away. As he leaves, Stephanie arrives to continue this stupid “steal the talent” story.

The Rock vs. Eddie Guerrero

Non-title. Rock snaps off some armdrags to start and grabs an armbar but gets suplexed down to give Eddie a breather. A one footed dropkick keeps Rock in trouble and it’s off to a chinlock. Eddie switches it up to a figure four headscissors with a handful of ropes for extra leverage. How that gives him more leverage has never been clear to me but it’s standard heel action so I’ll just go with it.

Rock fights up with those open handed punches of his and the DDT gets two. The Rock Bottom is actually countered out of the air into a rollup for two (leave it to Eddie to pull that one off) but the Frog Splash misses. Back up and it’s the spinebuster into the People’s Elbow for the pin.

Rating: C+. Part of that is for that counter to the Rock Bottom alone. My first reaction is why not just make this a successful title defense but Eddie hasn’t exactly been lighting it up in recent weeks. He was Intercontinental Champion back in May but I’m not sure if that’s enough to warrant a title shot. It actually makes sense and while I doubt it’s intentional, it’s good booking.

Post match Brock comes down and grabs the belt, which he throws at Rock’s feet. No violence but Lesnar still seems WAY over his head here.

Bischoff goes out to a see a very smug looking Stephanie. She gets out of the car and smiles as Brock and Paul Heyman gets into the car. Stephanie asks how it feels to be kicked in the testicles, which she says about four times in a minute. Apparently Brock has been signed to Smackdown. Good to know.

Overall Rating: C. This show was all over the place with big angles and some good matches but a lot of bad stuff like bringing 3 Minute Warning to the show where there are no Tag Team Titles. You have like two teams to go after the belts so you put a fresh team on Raw? The Shawn vs. HHH thing should be fun and will be a much bigger deal as we keep going. I know the idea here is shaking up a lot of things up but they seem to be doing that almost every few weeks. It’s a good show but they’re walking a rather thin line at this point.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 19, 2016
Location: Schottenstein Center, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s the night after Roadblock and we’re less than six weeks away from the Royal Rumble. That means it’s still the lull period as WWE knows the audiences will be smaller over the holidays, meaning there’s a good chance this is going to be a burn off show. If nothing else we can get more from Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho vs. Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins in that fresh main event story. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Owens and Jericho are in the ring to start things off with the champ welcoming us to the Chris and Kevin Show. Kevin says he’ll do whatever it takes to retain the title, including taking a Codebreaker from his best friend. “MONKEYS! SHOW US THE PICTURES!” They talk about the devastating Codebreaker, which was only so huge to make everyone believe.

Jericho thinks they’re so close now that Owens can have the Hug of Jericho as a special gift. Chris isn’t happy though because someone else named Chris has stolen his gimmick. Yeah, that Kris Kringle makes lists and gives people gifts so HE JUST MADE THE LIST. That brings Mick Foley (so much for the hip surgery at the moment), who reveals a Christmas shirt with a leather vest over the top.

Mick sets up a tag match for later but gets the city wrong, completely destroying the aura of the cheap pop. Going forward though, Owens is going to defend the title against Reigns at the Royal Rumble, with Jericho locked in a shark cage above the ring. Owens: “It’s not even safe!”

Due to general stupidity, Jericho gets inside the cage and demands that Foley prove it safe. Owens: “Uh Chris, get out first.” Foley locks him in and can’t find the key (though he does find a New Day shirt, a Dude Love wallet and a key that doesn’t fit). Mick says it’s fine because the cage doesn’t go up until he does this signal…..so Jericho goes up, presumably for a good while.

Back from a break and Jericho is down, though he’s dizzy and sick.

Big Cass vs. Rusev

Cass pounds away in the corner and that’s a DQ at 1:01.

Here’s Sasha Banks with her leg wrapped up and walking on a crutch. Last night she was defeated by the better woman and she’s not feeling much like a boss right now. Sasha wants Charlotte to come out here so she can congratulate her to her face. Instead it’s Nia Jax, who says Sasha will never be a boss because she’s just a little girl. The crutch is kicked out and Sasha is thrown around like she’s not even there.

Foley congratulates Sheamus and Cesaro for winning the Tag Team Titles because he feels like a proud papa. He even has a present for them: new title belts, with an identical design to the Smackdown belts but with red straps. A referee comes in and tells Foley there’s an emergency.

We cut to the hallway where Braun Strowman is destroying things. Foley comes up and Strowman demands Sami Zayn tonight. Mick says Sami is about a hundred miles away so Braun has to wait a bit.

Cedric Alexander vs. Noam Dar

This is over Dar hitting on Cedric’s girlfriend Alicia Fox with Austin Aries on commentary. A forearm puts Dar on the floor and it’s off to a break thirty seconds in. Back with Dar missing a dive off the top and possibly twisting his ankle. Cedric comes in with a springboard clothesline of his own, followed by the Lumbar Check for the pin at 5:10.

Post match Dar says they’re not even because Alexander still has Alicia.

Here’s New Day to address their title loss. They’re cool with losing the titles because Ric Flair couldn’t become a sixteen time champion without losing fifteen times. Big E.: “And that’s Charlotte in a month.” After declaring that they still rock, here are the new champions to interrupt. Sheamus and Cesaro are already bickering over who won last night so New Day insults Sheamus a bit more.

Cesaro on the other hand has catlike reflexes and is strong like a……someone help Big E. out. Cesaro: “Like an ox?” Kofi was thinking more like a carpenter ant who can lift seven times his own weight. They bicker a lot with Woods talking about how much merchandise they have at the moment. Cue Anderson and Gallows to talk about how sick they are of the New Day nerds, only to be cut off by the Shining Stars. A brawl breaks out and you can book the eight man tag from here.

Shining Stars/Anderson and Gallows vs. Cesaro/Sheamus/New Day

This is joined in progress with Epico hitting a nice double underhook gutbuster on Kofi. Gallows and Anderson take turns on Kingston as Saxton thinks Cesaro and Sheamus had one of the greatest accomplishments in the history of the division last night. This is why people make fun of you Byron. Anderson spikes Kofi and we take a break.

Back with the Shining Stars diving onto the champs and the Boot of Doom getting two on Kofi. Big E. comes in to clean house but Sheamus tags himself in, setting up an assisted White Noise for two on Epico. Cesaro comes in and swings Primo into the Sharpshooter for the submission at 10:46.

Rating: C. That’s your tag division people: the bickering champs, the bald guys who put “ski” at the end of random words, the jobbers and the team that is better than all of them put together. New Day is in a weird place now as they need something new to do but I’m not sure how they’re going to go fight outside of the division.

We recap the opening segment.

Enzo and Cass are talking about what they’re doing tonight when Enzo gets a letter. Due to exposing himself in the workplace on November 21, Enzo has to undergo sensitivity training.

Here’s Neville to brag about beating down TJ Perkins and Rich Swann last night. What he can’t understand is why people cheered him. Normally they only cheer for him because they feel sorry for him but he doesn’t need their pity. Neville will obliterate the division and can show up on 205 Live anytime.

Cue Swann to ask what was up with last night. Neville cuts him off and talks about mentoring Swann in Japan and getting no gratitude. This brings out Brian Kendrick to say he respects Neville. The double beatdown is on with TJ Perkins making a failed save attempt. Neville was GREAT here and maybe the best thing about the show so far.

It’s time for sensitivity training with Darren Young, Bob Backlund, Bo Dallas and Jinder Mahal joining Amore. Enzo gets to go first and starts in with his usual promo. He blames his partner for being here, which the therapist interprets as Enzo and Cass being married. Mahal goes next and the therapist asks how to spell his name. Enzo stands up and says exactly what you would expect him to say.

Titus O’Neil vs. Sin Cara

Strowman comes in for the no contest at 40 seconds.

Braun drags Cara to the stage and throws him through a Christmas tree and a bunch of presents as Foley looks on helpless.

Jericho is annoyed at being stuck in the cage because he’s arachnophobic. Owens: “That means scared of spiders.” Jericho: “I’m scared of them too!” After asking if Owens knows what it’s like to hang above the ring like a sexy pinata, they agree to work together tonight because Reigns and Rollins need to get……IT!

Here’s Charlotte to address winning the title back last night. She goes into a big speech about how no one is on her level because she’s a guaranteed win on pay per view. This brings out Bayley and Charlotte isn’t pleased. Bayley knows Sasha vs. Charlotte was the greatest rivalry of all time but now it’s time for the Bayley vs. Charlotte rivalry to begin.

Last night was all about the scoreboard and Bayley is 2-0 against Charlotte, including at Survivor Series earlier this year. Charlotte put up four fingers last night for the Four Horsewomen but Bayley didn’t come up with the rest of them because she just wasn’t good enough. The challenge is issued and Charlotte actually agrees to fight right now.

Bayley vs. Charlotte

Non-title. Charlotte works the arm to start and puts Bayley in trouble with the figure four headscissors. A headlock gets Bayley out of trouble and she rides Charlotte on the mat. We even get a little strut before Charlotte is sent outside. Back from a break with Charlotte ramming Bayley face first into the mat over and over.

A chinlock keeps Bayley in trouble but she fights out of the corner and gets in her sliding clothesline. Charlotte sends her into the corner again but the moonsault only gets two. Bayley reverses a chop into a backslide (with Charlotte’s shoulder clearly up) to put Charlotte away at 14:45. Graves points out the shoulder being up and replays confirm it.

Rating: D+. This was actually one of the sloppier matches I’ve seen in a good while. Maybe it was nerves or Charlotte being a bit tired after last night but this really didn’t work as well as I was expecting. I don’t think Bayley gets the title at the Royal Rumble but the big match at Wrestlemania has a lot of potential.

More from sensitivity training with Enzo making fun of Mahal but not hitting him, which shows progress.

Emmalina is sick of hearing about the Four Horsewomen and will be here when she feels like it.

The sensitivity class graduates. Enzo unsuccessfully hits on the teacher until Rusev comes in. Mahal blocks the other way out and the double beatdown is on. Lana comes in for a slap to Enzo’s face.

Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho

Rollins gets caught in the wrong corner to start and the Canadians take turns stomping him down. A quick Sling Blade puts Jericho down for two and the bad guys try to leave, only to get caught from behind. Back from a break with Reigns hitting his running clothesline on Owens, only to get decked so Jericho can take over.

The slow beating continues and we even get one of the suddenly favorite crowd reactions shots, showing a very bored looking girl. Owens puts on a chinlock of his own until Reigns gets free off a Samoan drop. Rollins comes in with a DDT/neckbreaker combo, earning himself two more crowd reaction shots. Jericho blocks a Pedigree and the frog splash to set up the Walls, sending Seth over to the ropes. Reigns gets in a Superman Punch and reaches for the hot tag, only to have Strowman run out to go after Roman for the DQ at 15:04.

Rating: D. Strowman getting involved is at least a little more interesting but DANG I’m bored with the main event scene right now. People were ready to cheer for Jericho, only to have the carpet pulled out from underneath them because SURPRISE, we’re right back where we were when these matches were announced.

A powerslam plants Reigns as Jericho and Owens watch from the ramp.

Overall Rating: D+. There was some effort this week but you could tell they weren’t putting forth their best try. Stuff like the sensitivity training felt like the old, bad comedy bits and the main event, save for Strowman, was just horrible. My guess is this is due to the holidays but they didn’t do themselves any favors this week. Not a good show but not a complete waste of time.

Results

Rusev b. Big Cass via DQ when Cass wouldn’t stop attacking in the corner

Cedric Alexander b. Noam Dar – Lumbar Check

Cesaro/Sheamus/New Day b. Shining Stars/Anderson and Gallows – Sharpshooter to Primo

Titus O’Neil vs. Sin Cara went to a no contest when Braun Strowman interfered

Bayley b. Charlotte – Backslide

Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins b. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho via DQ when Braun Strowman interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 15, 2002
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a big one. Last week it was clear that something had to change around here after one of the most dreadful nights in the history of this show. It’s not so much that the wrestling was bad (save for the mixed tag) but there was almost nothing worth watching and one boring match after another. Things really do need to change and change they will. Let’s get to it.

Undertaker is in his locker room with…..Paul Heyman? Maybe a Mean Mark reunion? Heyman takes credit for tonight’s main event (Undertaker/Brock Lesnar vs. Ric Flair/Rob Van Dam) because he’s looking forward to Undertaker vs. Brock at Summerslam. Undertaker is ready to make Brock famous and Heyman gets out as fast as he can.

Opening sequence.

Here’s the NWO to open things up. Actually it’s just their music as Vince McMahon comes out instead. Why did he do that you ask? It’s because the NWO is gone for good, no matter what. That’s certainly an improvement and it’s not like those that story was doing anything for anyone other than Shawn and the now injured Nash.

Vince goes over some of the World Champions in the company’s history (omitting some big names and getting some major reactions to some others) but says it’s time for a new era. The shake up of both shows begins right here because both show will have a General Manager. Vince says “General Manager” about ten times and kind of threatens the audience with what’s going to happen. The roster is sitting in the back watching the announcement because that’s what wrestlers do.

Flair thinks the new boss will be a McMahon.

Jeff Hardy/Dudley Boyz vs. William Regal/Eddie Guerrero/Chris Benoit

Elimination rules so this has a lot of potential. It’s a big brawl to start with Spike forearming Eddie for a way too early two count. Spike tries a sunset flip but gets small packaged to get us down to 3-2. Bubba gives Eddie a Bubba Bomb but Regal breaks up the cover and drags his partner into the corner for the tag off to Benoit.

The beating goes on for a bit until some Dudleyville right hands take Benoit down. Jeff comes in off the hot tag so house can be cleaned, only to have Eddie pull him down from the floor. The fast pace continues with Eddie taking Jeff’s head off with a clothesline and Regal hitting his weird jumping knees. A butterfly suplex gets two and the fans are staying right there with Hardy (Odd pink/white shirt aside. It looks like he poured paint over his head.).

Bubba makes a save and everything breaks down into the huge brawl. Eddie throws in the European Title with Bubba nailing Regal in the head for the DQ. A Swanton Bomb gets rid of Regal and we take a break with Benoit/Guerrero vs. Hardy to go. Back with Jeff grabbing his double legdrop rollup to get rid of Guerrero. Benoit snaps off a German suplex but gets caught by the Whisper in the Wind. Cue Eddie for another distraction so Regal can get in a brass knuckles shot to knock Jeff silly. The Crossface on the unconscious Hardy gives Benoit the win.

Rating: B. Now this is more like it. They were beating the heck out of each other at a frantic pace which is the kind of opening match you never get around here. To top it off they even managed to keep a champion strong as it took three people and a brass knuckles shot to put Hardy down. Well done all around here and a really good opener.

Bubba and Spike save Jeff from going through a table.

Coach speculates that the new GM could be Mick Foley or Vince’s brother (there’s a name you almost never hear about) but Heyman thinks it’s him. Paul goes up to see Vince but a woman comes in to tell Vince that the new GM just arrived. After a break the new GM comes in and it’s…..Shane McMahon, who isn’t the GM. Well so much for that. Shane is here to make sure Vince doesn’t screw things up. Vince: “You tried to put me out of business and now you have this concern?” Remember that line when we get to Smackdown. Shane knows who it is and thinks the new GM is a parasite.

Tommy Dreamer and Van Dam don’t know who the GM is but Rob had fun beating Heyman up last week. Rob leaves and Steven Richards comes in to set up a Singapore Cane match for later. Stevie canes Dreamer for a little preview.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Steven Richards

Canes are legal. The brawl heads outside early on with Dreamer picking up the steps (dude follow the rules) and getting caned in the jaw for his efforts. It’s a strong enough shot to draw some blood and Stevie suplexes him onto the ramp. Back in and Richards hits him a few more times as there’s only so much you can do with Singapore canes. Dreamer says bring it on and unloads on him with the cane. The DDT gets two but Richards’ superkick gets the same. Dreamer grabs the damaged stick and SHATTERS IT over Steven’s head for the pin.

Rating: D. The match was an excuse to do violent stuff to each other and that’s fine enough for something this short. It wasn’t the worst match in the world or anything and this was just over a year since ECW went under, meaning it doesn’t feel as pitiful as some of the nostalgia pushes like we’ve seen over the years.

Booker T. says that even though the NWO is dead, he still has issues with the Big Show. He wants to see a Coacharooni because Rock isn’t the only one who can mess with the Coach. The dancing isn’t that impressive and Lawler wants to know if Coach is Caucasian. Booker is all fired up….and here’s Eric Bischoff. Yes seriously, THIS is where they decided to debut him.

Here’s Vince in the arena to introduce the new General Manager: ERIC BISCHOFF! It doesn’t have quite the impact since we just saw him before the commercial. I’ve never understood that thinking and it really does hurt what should have been a huge moment. Bischoff talks about running the real WCW, meaning not the watered down version that invaded this company.

We hear about all the signings he made to show off his ruthless aggression. Next up are the Raw spoilers as the crowd is just dying listening to this speech which has NOTHING to do with what’s going on here. Nitro changed the face of sports entertainment forever and Bischoff made Vince keep up with him.

Bischoff was THIS CLOSE to putting the WWF out of business (not quite) and now it’s time to turn this show around. Eric says we’ll start things on Vengeance when he’ll sign the one piece of talent he never could get his hands on: HHH. So we’re just supposed to forget the Jean-Paul Levesque days? Bischoff promises to put the E back in WWE to FINALLY wrap this up.

Post break Bischoff sucks up to Undertaker despite him never coming to WCW (“I guess loyalty meant more to you than money.”) but Bradshaw scares the new boss off.

Women’s Title: Molly Holly vs. Trish Stratus

Molly is defending and I have no idea why this isn’t on Sunday’s pay per view. Lawler’s monitor goes out and the thought of not being able to see Trish terrifies him. Why he can’t just LOOK UP isn’t clear but I guess it’s a Bischoff rule. A running flip neckbreaker gets two for the champ and Trish trips trying a clothesline. Molly gets two more off a backbreaker and easily counters Stratusfaction into a rollup with feet on the ropes to retain.

Ric Flair isn’t interested in Bischoff.

Big Show vs. Booker T.

Show easily takes over to start and gets in an impressive looking suplex. A whip sends Booker into the corner and Show casually leans into a raised boot. Booker Cactus Clotheslines him to the floor but misses a chair shot. Show grabs the chair instead, shoves the referee and chairs Booker for the DQ.

Rating: D. So wait. They split up the NWO and NOW they make Show tough again? As usual Booker gets to look like nothing for the sake of another Big Show push because the real money is in Big Show and his bad fitting singlet. I really don’t get this but if Booker wins the rematch via pin, it makes up for a lot.

Show chokeslams Booker through the announcers’ table.

Heyman talks about Bischoff while Brock Lesnar lifts a piece of the set. You know, as monsters do. Paul has a plan for the tag match and Lesnar is pleased.

The announcers pay tribute to Jimmy Miranda, the head of the merchandise stands. I’ve heard Austin and Jericho speak very highly of him.

Hardcore Title: Christopher Nowinski vs. Bradshaw

The title now has a Texas flag design and I actually kind of like it. Nowinski is challenging of course and tries to get out of the match. Chris offers to lay down so Bradshaw can get the pin but IT’S A SWERVE! I mean, the SWERVE doesn’t work but at least he tried. The beating takes Chris into the back where Johnny the Bull jumps Bradshaw and wins the title.

Show comes in to see Bischoff and gets a match with Booker on Sunday.

Johnny the Bull thanks Eric for the chance and gets clotheslined so Bradshaw can get the title back.

Undertaker and Lesnar have a showdown.

Undertaker/Brock Lesnar vs. Rob Van Dam/Ric Flair

Flair and Undertaker start things off with some early chops actually setting up a WAY too early Figure Four. Undertaker will have none of that so Flair hits him low, only to have the champ get in a chokeslam for two. It’s off to Lesnar who throws Ric all over the place and gives him the triple backbreaker. Undertaker gets a thumb to the eye but you don’t need to be able to see to superplex Flair into a big crash.

A great looking powerslam plants Ric again but Flair is able to get over for the hot tag. Van Dam kicks Brock down and gets two off Rolling Thunder to Undertaker. Everything breaks down and Brock gives Flair the F5. A kick to the chest sets up the Five Star hits on Lesnar, only to have Undertaker plant Rob with the Last Ride for the pin.

Rating: C. This started off slow but a hot ending really helped pick it up. I’m really not sure why they didn’t just have Flair lose here as you would think he was the perfect option to do the job. But hey, that’s the point of the Intercontinental Champion right? Lesnar continues to not look great but putting him in there with people like Flair and Van Dam should do him some good.

Bischoff calls Rock and says he’ll be at Smackdown to sign him.

Overall Rating: C+. The show worked well enough but the Bischoff speech in the middle just crippled the whole thing. I liked the wrestling better this time around but there are still a lot of things in their way. We’re now pretty much back to where we were with the two owners (or at least we will be after Smackdown) and that’s…..not the most interesting idea in the world. Raw can be good if it can get out of its own way but given the way things have been going in recent weeks, I don’t see that happening anytime soon.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 12, 2016
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s the go home show for Roadblock: End of the Line (because there were NO OTHER NAMES FOR A PAY PER VIEW BESIDES ROADBLOCK so they had to use the name twice) but we’ve got two big deals to get through before the pay per view. Tonight we have the long awaited debut of the made over Emmalina as well as New Day trying to extend their Tag Team Title reign one more day in the hopes of matching Demolition’s all time record. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

New Day is defending and if they keep the titles, they tie the record for the longest Tag Team Title reign in WWE history. Woods talks about how this is their chance to elevate every New Day fan ever, along with Woods’ grandma. However, Xavier doesn’t get the idea of one more triple threat. Kofi says New Day IS the triple threat with Woods as the brain, Kofi as the handsome finesse and Big E. as the big, thick, meaty third leg.

Kofi and Cesaro start things off and the spinning high crossbody gives Kingston an early two. A dropkick sends Sheamus into the corner so the champs can run him over for two. Anderson and Gallows get to take over on Kofi and it’s off to a break. Back with Big E. down and Anderson and Gallows hitting something like a running Demolition Decapitator (nice touch) for two on Kofi. Sheamus tags himself in and starts cleaning house with the Philadelphia fans getting way into the ten forearms to the chest.

Big E. dives in to save the cover but gets an Irish Curse for his efforts. The Boot of Doom gets two on Sheamus with Cesaro making the save this time. That’s enough for the hot tag to Cesaro, who busts out all of his favorites, capped off with a high crossbody for two on Karl. Anderson gets caught in the Swing into the Sharpshooter but Big E. makes the save, only to have Cesaro hurricanrana his way out of a powerbomb. A Hart Atack with a Brogue Kick drops Anderson but Kofi runs in with Trouble in Paradise to pin Sheamus at 11:57.

Rating: B. I find it interesting that New Day won this clean instead of doing a heel turn, or really anything heelish for that matter. Of course there’s always the chance that something is done later in the night to screw this up but for now, that’s one of the unbreakable record that I never would have expected to be broken coming down.

The place goes NUTS for the record as New Day celebrates.

Back from a break with New Day arriving at their celebration party. After we stop to hug Stephanie, champagne is poured and goes right into Stephanie’s eyes. She throws the big bowl of BootyO’s everywhere and storms off because we haven’t had enough Stephanie moments lately. We just saw (what should have been) one of the longest, most untouchable records in WWE history matched and broken but no, because WE NEED A STEPHANIE STORY!

We look back at Sami Zayn/Braun Strowman/Mick Foley’s issues over the last few weeks. Sami has said he wants a match with Strowman “or else”.

Back with Stephanie all covered in champagne (because we’re supposed to believe that the smartest, most amazing woman that ever lived didn’t realize that she might get covered with champagne in a celebration INVOLVING CHAMPAGNE BEING SPRAYED EVERYWHERE) when Owens comes in to ask for a yet to be determined favor.

Braun Strowman vs. Curtis Axel

Splash, torture rack, wheelbarrow slam, Braun wins at 1:14.

Braun says Foley is protecting Sami because Sami can’t last two minutes against him. Foley is watching from the back when Sami comes in to demand the match on Sunday. No one saved Foley and Mick wouldn’t be where he is now if someone did. Mick says he’ll put Sami up against anyone on the roster but Strowman. That’s interpreted as Foley believing Sami can’t do it so Sami says if Mick won’t give him the opportunity, then maybe he doesn’t need to be on Raw anymore. Foley says he’ll call Daniel Bryan and work out a trade.

Ariya Daivari vs. Lince Dorado

Daivari knocks him to the floor to start but here’s Jack Gallagher to interfere. Gallagher has a mic though and actually announces his intentions to interfere in this match (because it would be ungentlemanly to not announce it in advance) because Daivari is a right scoundrel who deserves a proper thrashing. Jack officially comes in for the DQ at 2:37.

It’s time for Seth Rollins with the Rollins Report. After saying he wants HHH again, Rollins wants to know if Kevin Owens will be in Chris Jericho’s corner this Sunday so he brings out Owens as his guest. Owens comes to the stage….and sits on his own stool. Seth asks about the friendship with Jericho so Owens says they’ll have each others backs. As for tonight though, Owens will be teaming with Jericho against New Day for the Tag Team Titles.

Cue Jericho to say he thinks Owens is nuts. Owens loves the idea of stopping New Day’s bid for the record but Rollins suggests that Owens is trying to order Jericho around. Rollins calls Jericho sparkle crotch and that means HE……is going to make Jericho drop his pen. He’s going to put Rollins on the disabled list instead. The Canadians head to the ring and beat Seth down. Reigns comes out for the WAY too late save and the Canadians bail.

Rich Swann recaps the incident on 205 Live that set up Sunday’s Cruiserweight Title triple threat. Brian Kendrick comes in and threatens to stab Swann in the back. TJ Perkins comes in to laugh at Kendrick and it’s time for a match.

TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick

An early wristlock doesn’t get Kendrick very far and he has to bail from the kneebar. The Wrecking Ball dropkick knocks Brian outside and we take a break. Back with Perkins hitting a jumping spin kick to the head and a springboard missile dropkick for two. The Captain’s Hook is countered into the kneebar so Kendrick dives over to the ropes. Back up and Sliced Bread #2 gives Kendrick the pin at 8:24.

Rating: C-. So flash back to any time these two have fought in the last few months and update the details as necessary. This wasn’t interesting because neither of the wrestlers are interesting. The triple threat has some potential but for the life of me I never need to see these two fight again.

Foley adds Rollins/Reigns to the Tag Team Title match because it’s Philadelphia and we need another three way dance.

Charlotte and Sasha Banks will have no rematch after Sunday.

Video on Sasha vs. Charlotte.

Bayley vs. Alicia Fox

This is over a destroyed Bayley Bear. Bayley rides her to the mat to start and rides Fox for a bit, earning some HEY WE WANT SOME BAYLEY chants. The ax kick gets two for Fox but she spends too much time talking trash and walks into the Bayley to Belly for the pin at 2:45.

Here are Lana and Rusev to make fun of Enzo Amore. They’ve got some footage of what happened after the doors closed last week and of course we don’t get to see it. They make some more fun of Enzo until Big Cass comes out to brawl. Rusev and Lana bail, likely setting up a match on Sunday.

Jericho suggests that winning the Tag Team Titles might help his friendship with Owens.

Emmalina’s debut is postponed.

Sami Zayn vs. Jinder Mahal

Sami dropkicks him to start but gets kneed in the face to give Jinder what is likely a short term advantage. The chinlock keeps Sami down until the exploder and Helluva Kick give him the pin at 3:20.

Rating: D+. This was just a way to possibly write Sami off Raw, assuming they send Sami over to Smackdown like he should have been in the first place. Mahal is fine for a spot like this, though I find it hard to believe that this match was already set up coming into tonight’s show. Granted I can live with this though because IT’S NOT MAHAL VS. DARREN YOUNG!!!

Post match Mick comes out to say that Sami will be traded to Smackdown for a talent to be named. All he has to do is sign the deal, but first Mick offers to tell him who the talent will be. The official offer will be Sami for……Eva Marie. Sami goes nuts because he’s worth 100 Eva Marie’s and he’s tired of making up for Foley’s mistakes. He actually grabs Mick’s shirt and shoves him away because he wants Strowman so badly.

Foley agrees to make the match for Roadblock but says Sami better have the anger ready. There was never any trade proposed (the paper was blank) because Foley wouldn’t trade him. The only catch is there’s a ten minute time limit (earlier tonight Braun said Sami couldn’t last two minutes) because that’s all Mick is willing to risk Sami’s health.

Video on John Cena hosting Saturday Night Live.

Recap of New Day’s night.

Tag Team Titles: Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. New Day

New Day is defending and has the chance to surpass Demolition’s record reign. Again. Woods and Rollins start things off with a Sling Blade dropping Xavier. It’s off to Reigns vs. Big E. with E.’s spear being blocked by a raised knee. Jericho gets smart by tagging himself in to take over on Big E., including a top rope back elbow to the jaw. Owens and Big E. are both dropped by a double clothesline so it’s back to Woods.

Xavier is taken to the top and it’s almost a double Canadian superplex, only to have everyone else get involved for the super Tower of Doom to send us to a break. Back with Owens holding Woods in a chinlock until he misses the backsplash. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house with the belly to belly suplexes. We hit the hip swivel and the Warrior splash crushes Jericho, only to have Seth tag himself in. Everything breaks down again and Seth suicide dives onto Chris.

Another one takes out Big E., followed by a third to get rid of Kofi and Big E. at the same time. Jericho’s Codebreaker to Reigns is countered into a sitout powerbomb for a hot two. The Superman Punch nails Owens and Jericho rolls Reigns up for an even hotter near fall. Woods makes a blind tag and hits his really long top rope elbow for two on Roman. A knee to the face drops Woods but Rollins superkicks Owens to the floor.

Jericho crotches Rollins on top and Owens adds a Cannonball. The Lionsault gets two on Woods (I bought it for a second) and it’s off to the Walls to put Xavier in even more trouble. Woods turns it over and small packages him for two but he walks into a Pop Up Codebreaker. Rollins dives in for the save by shoving Owens into Jericho to break up the pin (smart). That means CANADIAN ARGUING, leaving Rollins to Pedigree Jericho. Big E. pulls Seth to the floor and Woods covers to retain at 20:23.

Rating: B+. This whole match is summed up with one line: New Day retained. That’s the only logical way to end this and it’s all that matters in the grand scheme of things. Now what makes it even better is they had some outstanding near falls and false finishes. New Day breaking the record makes the most sense and that’s what matters, no matter how you look at it.

Post match Owens and Jericho yell at each other with Chris saying they’re done. Jericho leaves and tells Owens to turn around, allowing Reigns to spear him to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. It really is amazing how well something can work when you tease a bad ending and then do the smart thing to send the fans home happy. I really liked the show this week as Raw has found a bit better balance. New Day retaining in two very good matches is the right way to go about things and the show was a lot of fun as a result. I don’t really care about Roadblock but at least we had a great go home show.

Results

New Day b. Cesaro/Sheamus and Anderson and Gallows – Trouble in Paradise to Sheamus

Braun Strowman b. Curtis Axel – Wheelbarrow slam

Ariya Daivari b. Lince Dorado via DQ when Jack Gallagher interfered

Brian Kendrick b. TJ Perkins – Sliced Bread #2

Bayley b. Alicia Fox – Bayley to Belly

Sami Zayn b. Jinder Mahal – Helluva Kick

New Day b. Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins and Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens – Pedigree to Jericho

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 8, 2002
Location: First Union Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Raw is actually picking up a bit at the moment as they’re making some efforts to push the younger talent. Brock Lesnar is moving up the card and it’s clear that Eddie Guerrero and Chris Benoit are becoming the top heels. Unfortunately that leaves the NWO, who are promising that HHH will be joining tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle from Smackdown with the double finish.

Vince announces Undertaker vs. Rock vs. Angle for Vengeance. Undertaker is off tonight though and the fans are NOT pleased.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Booker T. for an opening chat. He’s used to fighting the NWO and wants X-Pac in particular because X-Pac looks like a rat. Booker quotes his dad, who apparently spoke to him in promos about challenging people to wrestling matches. Instead of X-Pac, here’s Eddie Guerrero to answer. Eddie wants to fight someone so here we go.

Booker T. vs. Eddie Guerrero

Please give them some time. Eddie stomps him down in the corner to start and puts his feet on the ropes for two. A belly to back suplex sets up a running seated Blockbuster for two but Booker grabs his spinning sunset flip out of the corner for the pin. For some reason the bell doesn’t ring and Booker’s music takes a second to come on so there isn’t much of a reaction.

Rating: D+. So much for giving them time. I’m sure these two are capable of having a good match if you give them more than three minutes but then we wouldn’t have time for all of the NWO promos tonight. At least Booker didn’t have to do another unnecessary job here though and that’s a good thing.

Post match Benoit comes in for the beatdown but Goldust makes the save. The Dudleyz come in and clean house with chairs.

Rey Mysterio video.

Goldust grabs Booker’s hand for a celebratory dance. Booker isn’t happy with that because the NWO is coming for them. This turns into a discussion of Jon Bon Jovi until Booker superkicks a pretzel vendor who looks like X-Pac. That probably does deserve a beating.

Jackie Gayda isn’t happy about Trish Stratus interfering last week. Apparently Trish is jealous of the attention Jackie has been getting and can’t handle it. Christopher Nowinski comes in to rip on Trish for wearing a cowboy hat and looking like Yosemite Sam. The result is a mixed tag with Bradshaw as Trish’s partner. Of note here, Jackie had some of the worst acting skills I’ve ever seen here. She has almost no presence and is just reading her lines. Trish isn’t great but at least she sounds natural.

Video of Rock asking if Lillian would like some strudel. Lillian: “More than anything in the world Rock.”

Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Chris Benoit

Before the match, Goldust, dressed as Ben Franklin and talking like Santa Claus, suggests a partnership with the Dudleyz to fight the NWO. This turns into a discussion of wanting to punch Thomas Jefferson in the gonads. Benoit takes him down to start but gets suplexed. Eddie offers a distraction though and the middle rope backsplash misses. That’s enough for Benoit to snap off a German suplex but Bubba grabs one of his own. Eddie goes after Spike as the Bubba Bomb gets two. The Spike factor allows Benoit to grab the Crossface for the submission.

Rating: C. This is a good role for Bubba but I’m not clear on why Benoit and Guerrero aren’t higher up the card. I mean, save for Undertaker STILL being champion for reasons that aren’t clear. The match wasn’t much to see but at least Benoit won, albeit after making sure Bubba stayed strong.

Guerrero and Benoit beat on the Dudleyz until Booker and Goldust make the save.

Video on Nowinski at Harvard. Ok then.

Recap of last week’s ladder match.

Ric Flair praised Jeff Hardy’s performance last week when, I kid you not, STEVEN RICHARDS interrupted and set up a match with Flair for later tonight. You bring Flair back to the ring, turn him face, and then give him a match with Richards? I mean, if Richards goes over (which he won’t) it’s one thing but a quick Flair win doesn’t help anyone.

Jackie Gayda/Christopher Nowinski vs. Trish Stratus/Bradshaw

This is an infamous one. The guys start things off and Chris wants a little football, only to tag in Jackie when Bradshaw gets down in the three point stance. Trish gets two off a dropkick and shoulder, which pretty much ends the competent part of the match. Stratus charges at Jackie in what I think was supposed to be a toss over the top but Jackie completely misses her so Trish just bounced chest first off the ropes.

I think Trish calls for a drop toehold or maybe a small package but Jackie kind of lays on her instead. I’ve seen over 50,000 wrestling matches in my life and I honestly do not know what they were trying to do there. That’s not good, nor is it acceptable. Jackie chokes on the mat and then the ropes before thankfully bringing Nowinski back in for some missed elbows.

Trish tags out, which brings up another issue. JR keeps talking about how the women have to face the women and the men have to face the men, so why did Trish have to tag? Shouldn’t Bradshaw be allowed to come in without the tag taking place to satisfy the match rules? A fall away slam sends Nowinski over for another tag and the men leave, because that’s clearly the best idea.

Trish tries what looks to be Stratusfaction but Jackie goes to the mat, leaving Trish to force her over with a snapmare. Some chops in the corner allow Trish to desperately call spots as JR tries to say Jackie just needs ring time. Trish shoves her off the middle rope, waits for Jackie to turn around like she’s supposed to, kicks her back into the middle of the ring, and hits something like a middle rope fist to the back of the head (supposed to be a bulldog and didn’t make contact anyway).

The fist comes close to Jackie’s head, Trish lands and turns around, and THEN Jackie goes down, allowing Trish to get the pin after the longest three minutes and fifteen seconds that I’ve ever seen in wrestling. Ignore Jackie kicking out at two and a half as the referee count anyway because they can’t let this keep going.

Rating: U. For unacceptable. This is a perfect example of what happens when someone has no reason to be in the ring but is out there because they won some competition. Nowinski was nothing great at this point but he could wrestle an acceptable match. Jackie looked like she was in her first week or two of training, let alone being ready for a live match.

There’s a difference between not being able to do much (see someone like Maven in his Raw debut) but being able to do that little amount at a watchable level. This was the polar opposite as Jackie couldn’t even do basic stuff right and you could see Trish getting mad out there. Completely unacceptable here and one of the worst matches in history.

Benoit and Eddie are annoyed when the NWO comes in to say there’s strength in numbers.

Montage of Rock impersonating various people.

Here’s the NWO for a chat. We see the NWO offering their assistance to HHH at King of the Ring, which apparently means HHH is joining the team. Shawn recaps the Kliq and then runs down HHH for sucking up to the fans too much. Just like the NWO, the Kliq is for life. That’s why HHH has until Vengeance to make the biggest decision of his life. Nash has his own bombshell because he’s coming off the injured list tonight. His idea for tonight: a ten man tag with Booker T./Goldust/Dudleyz/??? vs. the NWO/Benoit/Guerrero.

Ric Flair vs. Steven Richards

So is this really just taking place so a Philadelphia guy can wrestle? Flair stomps him down in the corner, followed by the standard chops and punches. A toss sends Steven outside, followed by a belly to back into the Figure Four for the submission.

Rating: D. What the heck was the point of that? This was an NWA style squash with Flair giving up nothing, hitting his usual stuff, and winning the match with his finisher. If this is the best they can do with Flair at this point, they’d be better off making him the boss again or just leaving him as a heel because this was a waste of time.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar for a chat. Lesnar vs. Rob Van Dam is now for the Intercontinental Title (Wasn’t it already?) but Heyman would rather talk about making and exploiting everyone in ECW. Now Heyman wants to feed one of those people to the most dominant wrestler for the next ten years.

Tommy Dreamer comes out and threatens to innovate some violence and actually knocks Lesnar outside with a kendo stick. He makes the mistake of going after Heyman though and gets hit with the F5 on the floor. With Lesnar busy looking at Dreamer, Van Dam comes in and kicks Brock down. A Van Terminator knocks Paul silly. This was ALL for the live crowd, which is almost never a good idea for a TV show.

European Title: Jeff Hardy vs. William Regal

Regal is defending and gets punched in the face to start. The Whisper in the Wind barely makes contact but gets two anyway. A few knees to the face put Jeff down and the Regal Cutter gets two for the champ. Something like a Tazmission has Jeff in more trouble but Regal goes to unhook a turnbuckle pad. This villainy goes badly for him though as Jeff dropkicks him into the corner and hits the Swanton for the pin and the title.

Rating: D. Well that happened. Regal was similar to British Bulldog as he only held the title because he was from Europe, meaning Jeff isn’t likely the saving grace that the title needs. Hardy is basically getting the title as a consolation prize after last week, which doesn’t mean anything because the title hasn’t meant anything in years.

Video of This Is Your Life Rock.

Regal breaks down in tears over losing. Nowinski has to come in and help him up.

Bubba gives a rousing speech to get Van Dam to be the mystery partner.

Dudley Boyz/Rob Van Dam/Goldust/Booker T. vs. NWO/Chris Benoit/Eddie Guerrero

Remember earlier tonight when the Dudleyz didn’t want to team with Goldust and Booker T? Well forget about that because Nash has decided they’re partners here. There was no mention of Vince saying deal with it and team together and no scene of them agreeing to put issues aside and deal with a common enemy. Either of those things would have been fine and taken all of thirty seconds to do but instead we get neither, leaving it as a plot hole.

X-Pac and Van Dam start things off with Shawn shouting something from ringside. After the kicking exchange, it’s off to Goldust for an atomic drop and a tag to Bubba. Even Spike gets to snap off a headscissors but Benoit comes in to turn things around. The beating doesn’t last long as Van Dam is back in to monkey flip Eddie but the Canadian is back in to take over on Rob.

A superkick puts X-Pac down as the fans are trying so hard to care here. Unfortunately it’s all for naught though as the NWO is just sucking the life out of this show. The hot tag brings in Bubba to clean house but Van Dam goes after Shawn and walks into the F5 onto the stage from an invading Lesnar.

Back in and Benoit keeps working over Bubba as this keeps going. The tag brings in Nash to give Booker the big boot but he goes over to the other corner and OW MY QUAD! That would be a torn muscle and Nash wouldn’t wrestle again until April. Everything breaks down with Bubba checking on Nash and Shawn superkicking Booker. Show adds the chokeslam to put Booker away. JR: “IT’S AN NWO VICTORY!” Well to be fair, Benoit and Guerrero were just there anyway so it’s truer than it sounds.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen worse but you can feel the tape and paperclips coming off in a hurry. Nash getting injured is one of those things that only happens when nothing else can go wrong, but to suggest that he was going to save the whole show was ridiculous in the first place. Oh and well done by having Booker take the fall and not, I don’t know, SPIKE FREAKING DUDLEY. That’s so great.

Shawn says that’s what HHH is in for if he doesn’t join the team.

Overall Rating: F. This is a show where the wrestling was bad but the bigger problem is how it felt like the final straw. Yes the angles are horrible and yes the matches are hit or miss at best but tonight we had one of the worst matches of all time and one of the big stars coming back into the ring and then being put on the shelf for several more months, meaning the NWO continues to be worthless. Raw just does not have the credibility to survive something like this and it’s clear that they’re in need of a major shakeup.

On top of that, this was half Raw and half ECW reunion show with people like Dreamer and Richards being put on the card for the sake of appealing to the live crowd. Like I said, that’s fine for a show that has a lot of momentum but Raw had two decent shows in a row and that’s about it. Something needs to be fixed around here and it needs to happen in a hurry.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 5, 2016
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

We’ve less than two weeks away from Roadblock and the top of the card seems to be set. The big story continues to be Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens but the big question is how to keep Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte going even longer. They’ve only had five title changes in about four months and that’s just not enough. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho, including everything last week that set up the Roadblock main event.

Here’s Seth to get things going and he gets right to the point: he wants HHH. Life is about choices and one of the choices he made cost him a lot of his career. That was trusting HHH, but now he wants to get his hands on Chris Jericho. This brings out Owens, who doesn’t want to talk about his best friend’s health. Owens and Rollins don’t like each other very much but Kevin wants to talk about his Christmas presents. First up is a US Title match when Jericho will challenge Reigns for the title. Other than that we have Jericho vs. Rollins at Roadblock and a third match taking place right now.

So wait. NOW we’re going back to the HHH feud? I’m glad we’re getting somewhere with it but this feels like your standard Raw storytelling: we don’t have any reason to do it now but it has to be done so let’s just do it now and hope for the best because the details will work themselves out. Is it that hard to do ANYTHING to make this feel a little more natural?

Big Show vs. Seth Rollins

Show has REALLY slimmed down and is billed at 395lbs. Show tosses him around to start but Seth dropkicks the knee. More kicks to the legs set up the springboard knee to the head but Show doesn’t go down. A top rope version works a bit better but Show just shrugs it off again. Owens tries to yell at Show and gets chokeslammed for his efforts, leaving Show to walk out in what seems to be a mid-match face turn. Rollins wins by countout at 5:15.

Rating: C-. This was fine and another good use of Big Show. He and Kane both have been around for a LONG time but they’re still good for something like this. The match was more over an angle (though I’m not entirely sure what that angle is) and that’s fine for a five minute match.

Rollins superkicks and Pedigrees Owens.

Video on Jack Gallagher. He debuts tonight and we’re all better because of it.

Jack Gallagher vs. Ariya Daivari

Gallagher does the spinning wristlock to start and makes sure to smooth out his hair for good measure. The handstand walk gets him out of a headlock as we hear about Gallagher’s influences: Mankind, X-Pac and Steve Austin. Well he has good taste. The headbutt to the chest sets up the running corner dropkick and Daivari is done at 2:43. Gallagher is going to be a STAR if they give him the chance.

Daivari shakes his hand but takes out Jack’s knee like a villain should.

Owens yells at Mick Foley and says this wouldn’t happen if Stephanie was here. Foley really doesn’t care and walks away. Owens goes up to see Jericho, who just got here. He runs the matches by Jericho but Chris says the two of them aren’t good.

Enzo and Big Cass are in the back when Rusev and Lana are arguing a full fifteen feet away. Enzo goes over to defend Lana’s honor so she takes her ring off and throws it away. The certified G looks stunned and sends Cass away so he can pick up the ring. He asks Lana how she is doing and Lana looks sad. I’m enjoying this idea WAY too much.

Post break Enzo and Lana are still talking and she doesn’t think her husband understands her. She thinks Rusev needs to be taught a lesson. Maybe he wouldn’t take her for granted if another man appreciated her. This leads to an invitation to Lana’s hotel room. Wouldn’t that be Rusev’s room too? Lana leaves and Enzo dances.

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

Non-title as this feud just won’t go away. They slug it out to start with Owens bailing to the floor. Sami follows and gets sent into the barricade, followed by a big flip dive to the outside. That’s fine with Zayn as he hits one of his own, sending us to a break. Back with Sami fighting out of a chinlock and grabbing a tornado DDT onto the apron.

The dive into another DDT knocks Owens silly but he’s fine enough to hit his swinging superplex for two. Back to back Cannonballs have Sami reeling so he does a third tornado DDT. The half and half suplex sends Owens flying, followed by the Blue Thunder Bomb for two. A quick Pop Up Powerbomb finishes Sami in a hurry at 10:30.

Rating: C+. That’s the standard rating for these two and the question is how much higher can they take it. However, three tornado DDTs in a ten minute match isn’t a good sign. You don’t expect these two to seem like they’re phoning it in but this was nothing out of the ordinary. Not bad of course but I wasn’t feeling it.

Reigns comes in to see Jericho and the words STUPID IDIOT are uttered. Basically Reigns says don’t get cocky.

Video on Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte from last week.

Sasha challenges Charlotte to an Iron Man match for Roadblock. As for Ric Flair, Charlotte doesn’t deserve to live in his legacy.

We look at Charlotte yelling at her dad back in May.

Rich Swann vs. TJ Perkins

Non-title. They shake hands to start and Swann gets taken down off a shoulder. Back up and Swann scores with a dropkick and does a little dabbing. We hit a waistlock on Perkins for a bit until he dropkicks Swann’s knee out. There’s a running dropkick to knock Swann out of the Tree of Woe for two. Perkins goes to the top and dives almost into the spinning kick to the face to give Swann the pin at 5:51.

Rating: C-. I don’t know how to get into Perkins no matter how many times I try. He really comes off more as a heel than anything else but for some reason they’re pushing him as the gamer geek. Then again I never was a fan of him all the way back in the Cruiserweight Classic but he’s still one of the top stars in the division due to a lack of star power in the first place.

Bayley vs. Alicia Fox

This is over Bayley giving Cedric Alexander a Bayley Bear (yes that’s a real thing) even though Fox has a thing for Alexander. Fox gets knocked into the corner to start but grabs the northern lights suplex for two. We’re already in the chinlock but Bayley pops up with the Bayley to Belly for the pin at 2:20.

Enzo: “My mind is telling me no but my body is telling me bada boom go to the hotel room.” Cass isn’t sure but Lana texts Enzo with a picture included. Cass seems to change his mind as Enzo runs off. Rusev comes up to ask Cass where Lana is. A match is made for later.

Emmalina is here next week.

Mark Henry vs. Titus O’Neil

Titus is marketing this as the Tussle in Texas. World’s Strongest Slam ends Titus in 25 seconds.

Enzo is waiting on his Uber but gets a limo containing Ric Flair instead. Ric gives him the limo upon hearing about the foreign blonde.

Jericho wants Owens to stay in the back.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Roman Reigns

Roman is defending and is actually driven into the corner to start. The Superman Punch is countered with a dropkick and a clothesline puts the champ on the floor. A big dive to the floor takes Reigns out again and we take a break. Back with Reigns caught in a chinlock for a bit before being tossed out to the floor.

The Lionsault only gets two and the fans are getting WAY into Jericho all over again. A Samoan drop and Superman Punch get two on Jericho and the Codebreaker is countered into a sitout powerbomb. Roman goes shoulder first into the post though and we hit the Walls. As Reigns grabs the rope, cue Owens for a superkick. The Codebreaker gets two on Reigns but the Canadian argument sets up the spear to retain the title at 13:43.

Rating: B. Is there a reason why Reigns needs the US Title? Someone answer that for me. His feud is over the World Title and he doesn’t have a long term challenger but he’s still US Champion with no real prospects for a title feud anytime soon. Jericho vs. Rollins over the US Title could elevate the belt but Reigns is keeping it anyway. I don’t think I need to explain this one being good as Jericho is still on fire.

We look at Flair and Charlotte’s split again.

Rusev vs. Big Cass

And there’s no Rusev because, as anyone paying attention could tell you, it was a trap. Cass mouths the word “oh crap” and commandeers someone’s phone.

We IMMEDIATELY cut to Enzo at the hotel but he won’t answer the phone because it’s listed as unknown. Enzo knocks on the door and Lana opens up in a very short robe. Legs are shown and Enzo takes off the jacket despite being nervous. They both down some champagne and Lana rips off his shirt. Enzo eventually agrees to take off his pants and of course Lana reveals that Rusev is here. The beatdown is quickly on and Enzo is massacred. A vase to the head knocks him out and Rusev throws him out in the hall.

Anderson and Gallows vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

The winners get New Day, at ringside here, next week for the titles. Anderson and Gallows go outside and get in New Day’s face to start but the Europeans run them over, sending the cereal flying. Back from a break with Cesaro fighting out of Anderson’s chinlock and escaping the Magic Killer with some help from Sheamus. The hot tag brings Sheamus in for the ten forearms to the chest but everyone winds up on the floor for the brawl with New Day and that’s a no contest at 9:58.

Rating: C. This was fine though the triple threat for next week was obvious. I’m really not sure who wins the thing but it’s a cool feeling to have a match where I don’t know the ending. The match should be fun and I really could see it going either way. This match was just a means to an end and that’s fine.

It’s time for the big ending with Charlotte (who has accepted the Iron Man challenge) apologizing to her dad. We see her yelling at Flair (that makes three times tonight) but it was even harder to see Flair raise Sasha’s hand last week. Charlotte says no one can imagine how hard it is to be Ric’s daughter because of how big his legacy really is.

Then last week she saw her dad raise Sasha’s hand and she knew she had failed as his daughter. Flair comes out and hugs her but, of course (that’s a trend tonight) she slaps him in the face. Cue Sasha but Charlotte Alley Oops her face first into the post. Charlotte mocks Flair crying and walks away to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Raw is on something resembling a roll lately and a lot of that is due to them changing the way they’re doing some stories. Consider Enzo vs. Rusev. It’s a stupid story but it’s not something we’ve seen done in awhile. In other words, it’s something fresh, which doesn’t happen nearly enough. I liked the show and I’m wanting to see the triple threat, which is more than I can say about the main event scene.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Big Show via countout

Jack Gallagher b. Ariya Daivari – Running corner dropkick

Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb

Rich Swann b. TJ Perkins – Spinning kick to the head

Bayley b. Alicia Fox – Bayley to Belly

Mark Henry b. Titus O’Neil – World’s Strongest Slam

Roman Reigns b. Chris Jericho – Spear

Anderson and Gallows vs. Cesaro/Sheamus went to a no contest when all four brawled with New Day

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 1, 2002
Location: Verizon Wireless Arena, Manchester, New Hampshire
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re starting the second half of the year as things aren’t exactly the most thrilling at the moment. The big story here though is Jeff Hardy challenging Undertaker for the Undisputed Title in a ladder match. Now this match is really, really fondly remembered but I wasn’t blown away when I saw it a few months back. Maybe another viewing will change that so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Vince’s Ruthless Aggression speech from last week which transitions into Lesnar destroying Van Dam.

Here are Heyman and Lesnar with the former talking about how this is the summer of Brock Lesnar. See, Brock has the intelligence to be inspired by people like Kurt Angle. Over on Smackdown, Angle issued an open challenge to any rookie (actually it was to anyone Angle had never wrestled but whatever). Tonight, Lesnar has issued an open challenge to any veteran willing to be put into retirement.

Brock Lesnar vs. Ric Flair

Flair calls himself a legend but Brock says it’s the wrong year against the wrong guy. As usual, Lesnar is just not a good talker. Lesnar shows off the power to start but gets slowed down by a chop. A powerslam plants Ric and it’s time for Heyman to dance a bit. Some backbreakers send Flair outside because he has no idea what to do with a monster like this.

Back in and Brock goes shoulder first into the post but grabs the bearhug anyway. A not great looking spinebuster has Flair begging off but also sets up a low blow on Brock. The Figure Four is quickly broken up but Flair goes after Heyman, setting up the F5 to give Brock the pin.

Rating: D+. Lesnar beating a legend is a good thing but it didn’t exactly show us anything new. We’ve seen Brock do the exact same stuff time after time and that’s not exactly thrilling. He really is just a monster who is rising up the ranks but the lack of charisma and presence is hurting him.

Jackie Gayda says she didn’t lose the Golden Thong Award because she just didn’t win. Also, Molly Holly cost them the tag match last week. Cue Molly so they can brawl into the arena with Jackie missing a swing with a pipe. The fight heads into the ring but here’s Trish to pants Molly. Humiliation ensues.

Christopher Nowinski doesn’t want the Hardcore Title because it’s not worth the constant looking over your shoulder. Fair point actually.

Bradshaw vs. Christopher Nowinski

Non-title. Bradshaw beats him up and goes for weapons, only to be told that it’s a regular match. Chris gets in a bell shot for the cheap pin.

Rob Van Dam arrives and is annoyed that Lesnar has already had a match. He’ll settle for William Regal instead.

Jeff Hardy runs around backstage and climbs onto various things because tonight is a ladder match.

And now, Goldust is Darth Vader. Booker says he’s never seen Star Wars and he never will but he does seem to like the Lightsaber. “OBI-BOOK KENOBI!!!”

Vince and Eddie have a chat about ruthless aggression. The Spanish translation for ruthless aggression: EDDIE GUERRERO. Chris Benoit comes in and is ready for his Raw debut tonight. “The Smackdown guys” will have to be compensated somehow, even though Vince owns both shows now and should be able to dictate all roster moves.

Rob Van Dam vs. William Regal

Neither title is on the line. Regal starts with the half nelson suplex and those evil forearms to the face. The jumping double knees to the face have Van Dam in even more trouble and we hit a chinlock. A monkey flip gives Van Dam a breather and a spinning crossbody is good for two. Regal’s tiger bomb is countered with a backdrop and the Five Star gives Rob the pin.

Rating: C. Completely acceptable match here, assuming you’re ok with a champion losing clean. I get the idea of building towards Van Dam vs. Lesnar again and it gives Brock an actual feud but the lack of any serious drama doesn’t help much. This was fine though and that’s an improvement for Raw.

Post match Van Dam calls out Lesnar but Heyman comes out and says they’ll do it at Vengeance, presumably for the Intercontinental Title.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley vs. Chris Benoit/Eddie Guerrero

This is Benoit’s first match in over a year. Guerrero and Spike start things off with a dropkick and neckbreaker actually putting Eddie down. Bubba comes in and scores with a running splash in the corner as this is more one sided than you would expect. Benoit gets the tag and actually earns a nice round of applause for his first appearance in so long. It’s nice to see the fans show appreciation like that.

The first German suplex rocks Bubba but he partially lands on Benoit’s head for a somewhat scary visual. It’s back to Spike so we can get to the real beatdown. Bubba has to break up the Crossface but the save only allows some double stomping. Eddie dropkicks Benoit by mistake though and the Dudley Dawg sets up the hot tag to Bubba. One heck of a powerbomb gets two on Eddie as everything breaks down. What’s Up hits Eddie but he’s fine enough to climb the corner for a hurricanrana on Bubba. Not that it matters as Bubba gets in the Bubba Bomb to put Eddie away.

Rating: B. Who knew Bubba and Spike worked so well together? This was way better than I was expecting with Bubba doing everything he could and Spike taking a beating like few others could pull off. Benoit is back and while him losing doesn’t make a ton of sense, he looked great out there, especially with the suplexes.

Post match Spike gets thrown through a table and Bubba takes the Crossface, which turns into a choke.

Rey Mysterio is coming.

Big Show yells at Goldust, who says he’s Show’s father. Goldust hits him in the head with a plastic sword but here’s Kevin Nash, who says he’s Goldust’s daddy. You know, Nash and Dusty do have some similarities. Goldust gets beaten down.

Jeff Hardy ladder match highlight reel.

Undertaker isn’t worried about being in a ladder match and walks out when asked if he’s nervous. JR interprets this as being scared.

X-Pac is out too.

Booker T. vs. Big Show

This was supposed to be a tag match but Goldust and X-Pac are taking their naps. They take turns hitting each other in the corner and Show gets the better of it with a vertical suplex. It’s off to the bearhug for a bit, followed by a hard clothesline to drop Booker. Speaking of dropping, Show gets low bridged and dropped out to the floor. Show picks up the steps but gets them kicked back into his face for the very lame countout.

Rating: D-. Oh come on with that ending. You can’t have BIG SHOW do a job against Booker T., who could easily be in the main event scene at the drop of a hat. Big Show on the other hand looks like he’s wearing a one piece women’s swimsuit and has almost no business anywhere near above the midcard. But the NWO was a big thing years ago so let’s go with that.

Booker leaves through the crowd to avoid the NWO.

Post break here’s the NWO with Nash punching Show in the face. Shawn plays peacemaker and everything is cool because HHH is about to join the team. Ignore the fact that the NWO is on Raw and HHH is on Smackdown of course. For reasons of “it’s the NWO”, this takes WAY too long to accomplish. Shawn superkicks Show to wrap it up.

Vince makes Undertaker vs. Rock at Vengeance.

Matt Hardy wishes his brother luck and Lita makes a cameo to say the same.

WWE World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending and it’s a ladder match. JR warns us that this could be the biggest trainwreck in history. Before the match, Jeff jumps onto Undertaker’s motorcycle to start the mind games. The champ goes outside and has a ladder dropkicked into him, followed by a chair shot to the head.

That goes nowhere though as Undertaker clotheslines Jeff’s head off, only to have Jeff send him into the ladder up against the apron. Another ladder shot to the head knocks Jeff into the announcers’ table but Undertaker opts to climb back down and do some more beating. They both wind up inside for I believe the first time with the very slow beating continuing. Jeff slugs away for a bit but is punched right back down to kill the crowd again.

Undertaker puts Jeff inside the ladder for the apron legdrop and the destruction continues. A Whisper in the Wind gets Jeff out of trouble and he uses the ladder as a springboard to take Undertaker down again. It’s time for the big ladder and a horrible looking hurricanrana sends Undertaker outside. Jeff gets a hand on the belt but a chair to the back brings him right back down.

Undertaker loads up the Last Ride but Jeff gets in a weak chair shot to the head. Thankfully Undertaker almost pops back up so Jeff BLASTS him with a much better shot. That’s not really sold either as more chair shots slow Jeff down. A chokeslam off the ladder (chokeshove really) allows Undertaker to pull the title down.

Rating: C-. This is one of those matches that just hasn’t aged well. I remember losing my mind when Jeff hit Undertaker with the chair on the original viewing but this really doesn’t hold up later on. The last few minutes help this but it was a long squash until the ending. We’ve sat through a few weeks of Undertaker destroying the Hardys and now he does it again in Jeff’s signature match before moving on to the Angle match. Not great but watchable enough.

Undertaker leaves as Jeff pulls himself up. That’s not cool with the champ so he comes back and gives Jeff a Last Ride. Undertaker tries to leave again but Jeff says he’s still standing. Well with some help from the ropes that is. That brings Undertaker back to the ring again but he raises Jeff’s hand in a sign of respect.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is running with an anchor but they’re getting a few steps further this week. The main event made an attempt at elevating new stars and the tag match in the middle of the show was strong. Unfortunately this show’s biggest problem is that it’s compared to Smackdown. The blue show is doing almost everything right and making almost none of Raw’s mistakes. They’re trying a bit harder but there’s still a long way to go.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 28, 2016
Location: Spectrum Center, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s another big week for Monday Night Raw as there are two title matches announced coming into the show. This week we have New Day coming down the home stretch to the Tag Team Title record with a defense against Anderson and Gallows, plus Charlotte defending the Women’s Title against Sasha Banks (again). Let’s get to it.

We open with a look at last week’s main event.

Here’s Chris Jericho to open us up with the Highlight Reel. This week’s guest is Kevin Owens, who is setting a record with his second consecutive appearance on the show. Owens rips on America in general for their actions on Thanksgiving and Black Friday, which you would never see from Canadians like them.

They’re thankful for each other but Jericho is also thankful for Seth Rollins, who blew another title shot last week. People have been accusing Jericho of interfering last week but that was clearly Sin Cara wearing a Chris Jericho match. “He got the Mast of Jericho and he put it on maaaaan.” Apparently Rollins isn’t medically cleared to be here tonight so here’s Roman Reigns instead. Jericho calls Reigns a joke but Roman thinks Owens being Universal Champion is the real joke.

Owens stumbles over the name of his title so Reigns says Owens would have lost that title in any of his recent defenses. That’s enough for Jericho who asks if Reigns knows what that means but Owens tells Jericho to shut up because he’s got this (smart move as YOU JUST MADE THE LIST would have gotten a face pop). Owens threatens to powerbomb on the apron just like Rollins, which sounds fine to Reigns. Roman thinks if he wins tonight, he should get a title shot at Roadblock. The match is made.

Post break, Kevin and Chris get in an argument over whether or not Owens needs him. They split up until Mick Foley comes in to say Jericho won’t interfere in the match tonight. Jericho is more than willing to walk away on his own.

R-Truth vs. Braun Strowman

Truth gets in a few shots but the powerslam puts him away in 38 seconds.

Post match Goldust goes after Strowman until Sami Zayn runs in for some revenge after last week. This goes as badly as you would expect it to with Sami being put in the Tree of Woe again. Foley comes out to help break it up as we take a break. Back with Foley saying Sami is never going to quit, meaning he needs to be saved from himself.

That sets Sami off on a rant about Foley being bossed around by Stephanie. Foley says he saved Sami’s job by making Zayn vs. Strowman because Stephanie was going to fire him for not winning the Intercontinental Title (GOOD GRIEF PICK A SIDE WITH STEPHANIE ALREADY!). Sami wants Foley to be himself because he’s a hero to these people. All Sami sees when he looks at Foley is a hypocrite.  All I saw was Foley’s teeth falling out as he talked for a very weird visual.

Charlotte is ready for her championship celebration and sends Dana off to get things ready.

Cedric Alexander vs. Tony Nese

Cedric is the hometown boy and starts fast with a monkey flip. We see Alicia Fox watching in the back and smiling rather heartily at Cedric. Drew Gulak trips Alexander up so Nese can get two off a moonsault. We hit a bodyscissors for a bit until Cedric knees him in the face. Gulak offers another distraction though and a pumphandle driver ends Alexander at 3:24.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here but they’re setting up people as the cruiserweights get their own show tomorrow night. If Rich Swann gets the title tomorrow, Nese could be a potential first challenger for the title, which would be an upgrade over Brian Kendrick’s nothing character.

Enzo and Big Cass shill merchandise for Cyber Monday.

We recap the Jericho/Owens issues.

Jericho is offended at being asked if this argument is real. He goes to his care and the limo driver knocks the List out of his hands, only to have Rollins appear and beat Jericho down, including a big Pedigree on top of a car.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and we get Big Match Intros. Sasha gets in the Banks Statement about thirty seconds in but Charlotte is no Lesnar and makes the ropes. They’re quickly on the floor with Sasha being sent into the barricade to set up some chops. It’s actually a double countout at 3:09.

Rating: D+. What am I even supposed to say about this? I know WWE loves to keep these two fighting forever but I’m getting a little tired of it, especially when this is almost a guaranteed way to set up something else between them down the line. Of course this didn’t have time to go anywhere but what we got was the usual goodness between them.

Hang on a second as here’s Foley to say they’re restarting this match later tonight with no countouts, no disqualifications and falls count anywhere.

Rusev vs. Enzo Amore

Enzo says Rusev had the luckiest day of his life last week and it came on the luckiest day of his wife’s life because she got to see why Enzo is the realest guy in the room. We hear what Rusev and Lana might have had for Thanksgiving dinner but Enzo thinks she was thinking about him stuffing her turkey. A low blow DQ’s Rusev at 30 seconds.

Mark Henry is in a new movie and shoves Titus O’Neil down for saying it should have been his part.

Rich Swann vs. Noam Dar

Brian Kendrick is on commentary to yell about how he’s the champ and won’t be going anywhere because he needs to take care of his family. Swann starts fast as is his custom but Dar sends him throat first into the bottom rope to take over. A neck crank goes nowhere and it’s Swann’s spinning kick to the head ending Dar at 3:29.

Rating: C-. Words cannot express how much anything associated with Kendrick sucks the life out of a show. The guy is one of the least interesting heels in a long time and is really just there. You know what he reminds me of? Chavo Guerrero as ECW Champion. Yeah he can have watchable matches but there’s no energy to him at all and no one is looking forward to his matches.

Post match Swann calls Kendrick out and promises to win the title.

Sheamus and Cesaro are in a bar and talk about being the best team in WWE, even though they can’t stand each other. Various drunk guys come up and make fun of them, triggering a bar fight with the wrestlers cleaning house. They celebrate with a drink and seem to be on the same page.

Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens

Non-title. Owens jumps him before the bell but Reigns says ring the bell anyway (WAY too common anymore). The beating is on in a hurry with Owens knocking him to the floor before a backsplash gets two inside. Back with Reigns hitting a clothesline but having to put the brakes on to avoid hitting the referee.

That means a chinlock and Cannonball, followed by a long chinlock to keep Reigns down. Another backsplash hits knees though and they trade big forearms. A superkick gets two for Owens but he takes so long going up that Reigns nails a Superman Punch. Another one off the steps knocks Kevin silly and the spear finishes clean at 14:33.

Rating: C. Of course that’s the only way they can set up the pay per view rematch. It’s not like they could have had Owens get counted out or something (because we just HAD TO DO THAT FINISH earlier) because the solution was to just pin one of the weakest booked champions in recent years.

Owens is annoyed at being asked about the match. He blames Foley for the loss because he should have been at Jericho’s side. They’re still best friends you see.

We get a sitdown interview with Paul Heyman, who says he and Brock Lesnar screwed up by underestimating Goldberg. After twelve years on the sidelines, Goldberg stepped into the ring and cracked Lesnar’s ribs with a spear. This is now part of Lesnar’s legacy and it’s an embarrassment. The loss makes Lesnar think he has something to prove, which really scares Heyman, who doesn’t know what it’s going to turn Lesnar into. If Goldberg is in the Royal Rumble, so is Brock, which means there will be one conqueror, 28 losers, and one victim.

Emmalina video.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Andeson and Gallows

New Day is defending of course. An early powerbomb gets two on Woods and a fireman’s carry flapjack gets the same. With Big E. down on the floor, Gallows kicks Woods in the head as we go to a break. Back with Big E. coming in off the hot tag to clean house. A belly to belly suplex drops Anderson but a Gallows distraction lets Karl get in a kick to the chest.

That earns Anderson the spear through the ropes but the Midnight Hour is broken up with a boot to the head. The Magic Killer doesn’t work either so Woods blasts Anderson with forearms to the face. Karl tries a rollup with a handful of trunks but Woods reverses into one of his own to retain at 9:58.

Rating: C. The match was fine but there was no way the titles were changing with two weeks to go before the record. If they’re going to do that (and I’m not sure who it would be against unless we get Cesaro and Sheamus again), it’s not going to be until two days before the record is broken. New Day still cheated again but it felt more like the fun cheating instead of the evil version last week.

Bayley gives Sasha a pep talk and it turns into a speech about the greatness of Ric Flair.

Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks

Charlotte is defending and this is anything goes with falls counting anywhere. Sasha starts fast by knocking the champ outside and scoring with a suicide dive. A double clothesline puts both women down as we take a break. Back with Sasha fighting out of a bodyscissors and kneeing Charlotte in the face.

The double knees in the corner miss though and a big boot knocks Sasha off the apron for two on the floor. Natural Selection on the floor gets the same and the champ is annoyed. The annoyance takes so long that Sasha pulls out a kendo stick and swings away, drawing the ECW chants. Charlotte knocks her down again and grabs the Figure Eight, only to have a stick shot break it up.

They fight towards the announcers’ table where Charlotte moonsaults onto Sasha….or at least a few feet to Sasha’s right, for a near fall. Sasha gets in a Thesz press off the barricade for two more and both of them are down. They head into the crowd and Sasha ties her up in a handrail, setting up the Bank Statement to make Charlotte tap at 16:28.

Rating: B. I’m not sure how many more times I can put this the same way: the match was good, Charlotte missed the big spot, and Sasha gets the title back. She’s held the title twice before with both reigns lasting twenty seven days. It’s really hard to care again when we’ve seen this multiple times and it’s ended in less than a month both times. Still though, good stuff.

Ric Flair comes out, raises Sasha’s hand, and is gone in less than thirty seconds. Banks celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was an awkward show as it had good wrestling but the stories felt slapped together. It’s really amazing how fast Smackdown turned around to be ready for Tables, Ladders and Chairs but Raw seems to be scrambling with twice as much time before Roadblock. I liked the show but they need to tighten things up a bit, which doesn’t mean threatening us with more Stephanie anger.

Results

Braun Strowman b. R-Truth – Running powerslam

Tony Nese b. Cedric Alexander – Pumphandle driver

Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks went to a double countout

Enzo Amore b. Rusev via DQ when Rusev hit him low

Rich Swann b. Noam Dar – Spinning kick to the head

Roman Reigns b. Kevin Owens – Spear

New Day b. Anderson and Gallows – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Bank Statement

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 29, 1999
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 13,222
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This was a special request for one specific reason: Test and Stephanie McMahon are getting married. Oh how I remember this and how I remember how you could feel the Russo effect, even though he’s already left the promotion. Test was one of Russo’s big projects and this is pretty much the high point of his career, which should tell you everything you need to know about him. Let’s get to it.

Big Show/Kane vs. Viscera/Big Boss Man

This is during Big Show’s original WWF World Title reign and it’s still odd to see this version of him with the title. Kane has Tori in his corner. Big Show and Boss Man immediately fight to the floor so we’re down to Kane vs. Viscera inside. The masked man takes over but here’s X-Pac to hit Kane in the back with a chair. An X-Factor onto the chair sets up a Viscera splash for the pin in less than two minutes.

X-Pac spits at Tori and kicks her in the head.

We recap Test proposing to Stephanie and Vince making Test’s life a nightmare as a result. This includes Stephanie taking a bump on the head and getting amnesia. She’s marrying Test anyway.

Here’s D-Generation X (heels here) for a chat. After some random music cuts off, HHH wants to talk to Vince. It’s Vince’s fault that this has escalated so much, leaving DX no choice but to get a temporary order of protection (I’m really not a fan of that idea but it keeps coming up in wrestling). We see a clip of Vince ramming DX’s limo with his own car and HHH says there will be NO wedding here tonight.

Cue Vince to laugh at the idea that DX needs protection from him. As for tonight, Vince is giving Test a special wedding present: a one on one match with HHH. The rest of DX gets a six man tag against Rock/Mankind/a partner of their choosing just because the boss is feeling generous. Finally, if anyone interferes in the wedding tonight, they’ll be fired.

Al Snow talks to Head, guaranteeing that he’ll be Rock and Mankind’s mystery partner in the six man.

Edge vs. Matt Hardy

Matt has Terri in his corner. Edge charges into an elbow in the corner to start and a bad looking tornado DDT puts the Canadian down. Since this match is going to be lucky to get two and a half minutes, Edge picks up the pace by grabbing an atomic drop. A German suplex gets two on Matt but he comes right back with a superplex for the same. The cameraman gets decked and the partners get involved, leading to a spear ending Matt.

Rating: C. These guys always have chemistry together but, as usual, you need more time than just a few minutes to get anywhere. The interference didn’t need to exist but you can see another big match coming because that’s all these guys were allowed to be. Things would get a bit better once Lita would replace Terri as well.

We go to Stephanie’s bachelorette party last night, complete with Fabulous Moolah, Mae Young and Truth or Dare. This goes nowhere, yet.

Here’s Intercontinental Champion Chyna with her bad thumb for a chat. Her thumb has been feeling better since hitting Chris Jericho in the head with a hammer (this is WAY too causal of a line) so he needs to get out here so she can finish the job. Cue Jericho to show us a clip of the hammer shot(s), which COMPLETELY ruined his Thanksgiving. He’ll be ready for their match at the pay per view but here’s Miss Kitty (Chyna’s semi-lesbian servant) to blast him with a fire extinguisher.

Back to the party where more drinking ensues.

Godfather vs. Steve Blackman

They trade kicks to start and Godfather’s spinning legdrop gets two. A bicycle kick ends Godfather in a minute.

The Acolytes and the freshly debuted Dudley Boyz play cards and insults are exchanged.

Dance time at the party.

Snow tries to get Mankind to accept him as his partner, even though Al hates Rock.

Too Cool vs. Hollys

Before the match, Hardcore makes unoriginal fat jokes about Rikishi. Crash starts, gets caught with the Worm and is finished by the Trash Compactor in less than a minute.

Rikishi gives Hardcore a Banzai Drop, followed by the required dancing.

It’s striptease time!

HHH vs. Test

Someone in a Vince McMahon mask comes out to referee. Ok then. Anyway Test slugs away to start as the announcers immediately start talking about the angle instead of the match because that’s what matters around here. The Stooges are in the back, shouting to Vince that he needs to see this. HHH comes back with right hands and his kneedrop for no cover.

Instead HHH starts pounding in right hands to the face before choking away. A sleeper slow things down even more but the referee pulls HHH off. That always good looking gutwrench powerbomb plants HHH but he escapes the pumphandle powerslam. The referee won’t count a cover off a facebuster so HHH goes for the mask. Cue Shane McMahon with a chair to HHH’s head, setting up Test’s top rope elbow for the pin.

Rating: D. I was waiting on Vince to come out and reveal Shane as the referee so well done on not going with the obvious. This is the high point of Test’s in ring career and it means a grand total of nothing because it’s a match in 1999. As usual it was all about the angle, which is only going to have something resembling a payoff because there’s so much other stuff to cover.

Someone sends Stephanie a shot, which she downs like a pro.

HHH orders the cops to arrest Vince.

We look at last week’s gravy bowl match with Miss Kitty needing the Heimlick Manuever to remove a mushroom from her throat. The EMT who saved her was attacked by Ivory and Michael Cole (looking even more like a goon than he does today) brings her out for a chat. The EMT, named B.B., was humiliated by Ivory ripping her shirt off….and wants an evening gown match. Ivory comes out with some insults before clothing is removed. This was some of the most awkward exchanges I’ve ever seen, even by WWF standards.

Patterson and Briscoe say Vince was with them the entire time.

Val Venis vs. Kurt Angle

After Val does his regular schtick (something about scoring like Shaq), Angle rips on this town for having no values. Venis jumps him from behind but is sent outside to turn this into a bit of a brawl. Back in and Angle’s sleeper is countered into a Blue Thunder Bomb for two (of course). Cue the British Bulldog (feuding with Val) to break up the Money Shot, allowing Angle to get two of his own off a superplex. Bulldog hits Val in the back with a chair to set up the Olympic Slam for the pin.

Rating: D. More of the same problems here as we’re actually setting up British Bulldog vs. Val Venis for reasons that aren’t important enough to explain. At the same time, KURT ANGLE, who debuted less than a month ago, can’t even get any attention because we’re setting up some low level midcard match? Really? That’s the best they can do?

Snow is STILL trying to get on the team and keeps insulting Rock. Cue Rock of course, who can’t believe he’s talking about someone named Al. Rock’s advice is for Snow to dress up like a Los Angeles King and do a certain something with the hockey stick. Rock leaves but Snow and Foley are still on for Disneyland tomorrow. The fans were eating Rock up here.

D-Generation X vs. The Rock/Mankind/???

The mystery partner is…..Kane. Makes sense. Kane and Gunn start things off with Billy’s arm being twisted around. Everything breaks down in a hurry with Foley taking a beating while the announcers rip on literary critics for not reading his book. Back in and Gunn spits at Rock so the triple teaming can continue. Someone needs to teach DX how to do the Unicorn Stampede. A low blow gets Mankind out of trouble and everything breaks down off the hot tag to Rock. The Rock Bottom looks to finish Gunn but it’s Snow running in with a Head shot to Dogg, drawing the DQ.

Rating: D+. Slightly better here due to the charisma involved but the lack of time or really anything all that interesting brings it right back down. The Rock N Sock Connection was a funny team but they were another good example of the titles being turned into a prop instead of being used as something important.

Rock beats Snow up.

Back to the poker game where the Acolytes cheat. Bubba: “You sure ain’t the Public Enemy.”

Linda sees Stephanie in the wedding dress and nearly loses it.

Test is nervous.

Bubba bets all of his money because he has six aces in five card draw. The fight is on with the Dudleyz getting the better of things until it’s broken up.

DX is very happy about something.

It’s time for the wedding with the bridesmaids and groomsmen (various wrestlers). After Shane escorts Linda out, here’s Test to his theme music. Eh I like the song so it’s cool. Stupid but cool. Thankfully Stephanie doesn’t have music yet so she comes out to Here Comes the Bride. It’s better than that stupid rap song she has now. The minister says a blessing and two people sing a song.

The main issue here is Stephanie’s face as she doesn’t know how to convey more than about two emotions. Therefore, while it’s supposed to be the happiest day of her life, she looks like she’s about to slap everyone in the ring. We get to the all important “speak now or forever hold their peace”…..and here’s HHH.

Test puts on his mad face as HHH shows us a video. With the camera in the backseat, HHH drives his car into the Little White Chapel and of course picks the cheapest option. HHH talks to….I guess the minister and reveals the unconscious Stephanie in the front seat (Audience: “GASP!”).

HHH does a falsetto voice because THIS WEDDING PERSON IS A FREAKING MORON WHO DOESN’T REALIZE STEPHANIE IS OUT COLD and somehow they’re married. The guy who brought Stephanie the shot earlier is revealed as the cameraman as the couple drives away. Back in the arena, HHH says he’s now a member of the immediate family. That leaves one question for DAD: “How many times did we consummate the marriage?” The McMahons are in tears to end the show.

DANG. I haven’t seen this in full in a long time but my goodness this was amazing. Everyone knew HHH was going to do something big but I don’t think anyone had any idea that it could actually be this big. This is the moment that turned HHH from a top heel to THE heel and Stephanie turning on her dad the next month would make it even better. Couple that with the Rock rising up the card to fight HHH and there’s no wonder why the next year would be some of the best stuff the company has ever done.

It should also be noted that this was NOT Russo’s story. This was one of the first big stories of a guy named Chris Kreski, who had this boneheaded idea of planning stories out and slowly building towards the big payoffs instead of the tried and true method of making this nonsense up as he went with 34 different twists in a two hour show. Clearly that’s how wrestling works and not this “storytelling” thing.

Overall Rating: D. The transition between Russo and sanity wasn’t kind as there were still all the bad matches with no time (two matches lasted less than Goldberg vs. Lesnar II) and the angles all over the place didn’t help things. However, as bad as those were, the star power on the show was more than enough to carry a lot of the dead weight and that’s why 2000 was so great.

With Rock as the undisputed #1 face in the world, Mankind as the perfect comedy buffoon sidekick and HHH as the biggest heel since Vince, the sky was the limit going into the new year. Unfortunately we weren’t there yet and needed a Radical change in the midcard to really make things work. It’s still a work in progress but also the start of a great lesson of what you can do when the effort is put in. Check out the wedding in full if you’ve never seen it though as it’s some of HHH’s best work ever.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6