We started with the traditional long interview with a backdrop of the Highlight Reel. Jericho’s guest was supposed to be Randy Orton but he got every male member of the Authority instead. HHH talked about how he was considering changing Brock’s opponent for Night of Champions. Everyone suggested they should get the shot in Cena’s place.

This of course drew out Cena to say he’s going to be ready and he actually threatened a lawsuit if HHH changed things. We can file this in the category of STUPID IDEAS THAT WWE USES EVERY FREAKING MONTH AND FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND HOLY CUT IT OUT ALREADY! Anyway, Cena talks about how he’ll be COO and will fire HHH if he changes the match. HHH laughs this off and says he knows Cena has changed. Orton took the mic and insulted Reigns, which of course brought him down. The obvious six man was made as a way for HHH to determine who wants it the most.

We got a good midcard tag match with the champions Dolph Ziggler/Sheamus vs. their respective challengers in The Miz/Cesaro. The wrestling wasn’t bad but the ending was creative. Miz (who had a makeup lady and director’s chair) tagged in his stunt double Damien Mizdow to take the Zig Zag with him. Ziggler got caught up in the heat of the moment and got caught by the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin.

There’s an actual story here and it’s getting interesting for the most part. That’s a rare thing for the midcard scene and it’s very refreshing. Miz continues to nail this character. He won’t be World Champion but it’s a great midcard character for him to rebuild his career. I’ve always been a fan of the guy and it’s good to see him getting another chance like this.

Now we get to the part of the show that everyone hated. Well one of them at least. We got the first of the Growing Up Bella segments, which consisted of Nikki telling stories about how horrible Brie was growing up. These ranged from Brie stealing her prom date, costing Nikki her driver’s license and wrecking their car to Nikki taking Brie’s high school exams for her.

These were treated like the most dramatic moments in history and as you would expect, Nikki Bella ruined any drama they could have had. This is the problem with the whole Bella storys (among other things): the Bellas can’t act and the stories are so over the top that they can’t be taken seriously. I have no idea why I’m supposed to care about whatever nonsense they had like fifteen years ago or however long it was. I understand that this is to make people watch Total Divas, but for the love of all things good and holy, if this is what is popular on reality TV, I shudder at the future of the human race.

In case you didn’t get it the first time, we had a horrible eight Divas tag to promote the show even more. It lasted a minute and ended in a big brawl. Again, I understand that it’s cross promotion, but this is making the whole division look like an even bigger joke than it ever has, and that’s covering a lot of ground.

Mark Henry and Big Show beat the Wyatts via DQ when Rusev interfered. This is the third time these teams have fought in a few weeks and these matches are getting weaker every time. It’s not that they’re bad, but they’ve pretty much done everything they could to each other at this point so why would I want to see them fight even more?

Michael Sam was invited to Raw next week. Even though he hadn’t accepted yet and there was a very solid chance he could get signed to an NFL practice squad, WWE put him on a graphic saying next week. This screams of desperation and a way to make people care about them when Monday Night Football debuts next week. Instead of having good action, they’re resorting to gimmicks because they’ve wasted so much stuff over the last few months.

Oh and Sam signed with the Dallas Cowboys so he’s not going to be on Raw, making the whole thing a waste of time.

Recap of last week with Cena, Lesnar and Heyman’s promos.

Heyman talked about how hard Cena is working but insists it won’t matter. Short and sweet here.

Jack Swagger beat Curtis Axel in a short match with the Patriot Lock. After the match, Bo Dallas had three people talk about how Swagger ruined their lives by losing to Rusev. This was a hilarious bit and makes me like Dallas even more. Just like the tag match earlier, it’s nice to see the midcard getting some attention. Above all else though, they’re actually using some fresh stories instead of the same nonsense over and over.

Adam Rose beat Titus O’Neil in a nothing match that was more focused on Heath Slater vs. the bunny. Again, instead of doing something interesting or important, this is what we get on Raw.

Rusev squashed Ryder and got chased off by Mark Henry. More filler but at least it helped build a story and made sense given what happened earlier.

Stephanie brought out Nikki Bella and gave her a Divas Title shot. Brie came out and they did their usual schtick with Nikki ranting about Bryan leaving Brie one day and Nikki will be the Bella everyone is talking about. AJ Lee came out and talked about how she’s the #1 contender and how she’s getting the shot. Paige came out and said she’s the Divas Champion but Nikki and Brie took over the segment again with Nikki shouting that she’ll forgive Brie if she quits again and doesn’t come back. Brie shoved Nikki down and left, AJ picked up the title but handed it back to Stephanie, and Paige just kind of looked around.

Somehow that segment took the better part of fifteen minutes. Again, this is designed to make people care about Total Divas and give the show drama, but now it’s looking like it’s taking over the Divas Title as well. Everything Paige and AJ have done is being sacrificed for the sake of giving the producers of the most overly scripted reality show I’ve ever seen extra drama. We now get to listen to the Bellas talk about betrayal and all their drama and dear goodness is it going to be bad.

At the end of the day, the biggest problem is this leads to Nikki vs. Brie, likely in a major match. If I stretch, I might be able to think of three Bella matches that are worth watching. They’re just not good workers but it’s going to be a big focus of the shows going forward because we need more drama for Total Divas. The match is going to be a disaster because it’s going to be treated like the most important thing ever and the overacting is going to cripple it. It’s not exactly Once In A Lifetime or the Mega Powers Exploding and the build is horrible. But hey, the ratings for Total Divas might be up because there’s a huge crossover there right?

Jericho vs. Wyatt in a cage next week so Bray talked about a rat running from a snake.

Goldust beat Jimmy Uso in another nothing match. Goldust crushed Jey’s already injured knee after the match to cement the heel turn.

Big Show told Henry he’d have his back against Rusev but Henry wants to do it himself. This seems to set up Show’s latest heel turn.

The six man main event was fine and built on the story of Cena finally getting in and cleaning house. However, after he got the tag and destroyed everyone, Cena tagged out to Reigns for the spear and the pin. There really wasn’t much great here but the match was long and the first good wrestling we had all night.

Raw this week was a borderline disaster and a lot of it was due to the Bellas. I’ve said it a few dozen times now, but the Bellas are not good actresses and the story isn’t working. It’s just so overdone and overexposed and the rest of the company is suffering as a result. This is the same problem that TNA often has: if you don’t like this story, don’t bother watching the show because it’s what you’re getting. Raw was basically three stories: Cena vs. Authority, Henry vs. Rusev and the Bellas with the other stuff just being there to fill in time. That doesn’t make a good three hour show and it’s really causing a lot of problems week to week.

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It’s Labor Day and we’ve got less than three weeks before Night of Champions. The main stories for tonight are the return of some needed big names like Jericho and Orton. Last week made it clear that they didn’t have the talent pool to fill a three hour show so those two should help things out a little bit. Also tonight we get Cena’s response to Lesnar and Heyman’s promo last week. Let’s get to it.

We open with Chris Jericho in the ring for the Highlight Reel. JBL is already over him, talking over Jericho’s lines about how bored he is. Jericho is glad to be in Des Moines. “I love those cheap pops!” His guest tonight is someone who has been given everything he’s ever had in WWE: Randy Orton. Instead he gets HHH, Kane, Rollins and Orton, all in suits. Jericho calls Kane Jaws (James Bond reference) but HHH says Jericho is the man who never grew up. “Figuratively and literally.”

Jericho references Stephanie getting arrested and wants to know why HHH is wearing a pink tie. HHH insists it’s violet and talks about watching Lesnar vs. Cena from Summerslam over and over. After seeing how brutal it was on Cena, he was thinking of giving someone else a title shot at Night of Champions. Orton says it’s him, and reminds Chris that he’s earned everything in WWE. Kane and Rollins both suggest themselves, with Rollins getting a very nice reaction as the hometown boy. Jericho thinks he should get the shot, but here’s serious Cena to interrupt.

Cena isn’t cool with people saying he can’t win just because some Hall of Famers thought he can’t beat Lesnar. People didn’t think he could beat HHH at Wrestlemania XXII but he made him tap out. Cena invoked his rematch clause and HHH approved it, so now if HHH changes things, he’s facing a lawsuit. If that happens, Cena will be the COO and fire HHH as a result. HHH is amazed to hear Cena threatening lawsuits and says he’s trying to prevent Cena from going over the edge.

He knows his job and knows what being COO means. HHH can’t let Cena get hurt again, but Rollins and Orton both imply they can beat Lesnar. Jericho brings up Reigns beating Orton at Summerslam but Randy says he could lay out Reigns right now. Cue Reigns of course to tell Orton to drop him right now. Roman says he belongs in the title hunt so HHH makes a six man tag for a chance to prove themselves, whatever that means. Rollins tries to nail Reigns and gets punched in the jaw.

Miz/Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler/Sheamus

The villains have Sandow and some chick at ringside with them. Cesaro uppercuts Ziggler in the face and drops ten elbows of his own for no cover. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick but goes after Miz, sending him running to the floor. Miz sits in a chair while Sandow gives him water and the girl checks on Miz’s makeup. The movie star comes in but gets caught in a Thesz Press, sending him running away from the right hands.

Sheamus chases him to the floor and tries some right hands, sending Miz running back into the ring. Miz actually fights back with some left hands, but you know Sheamus is fine with a brawl. He ties Miz up in the ropes for the forearms but Cesaro sneaks in with a cheap shot as we take a break.

Back with Miz on the floor getting cleaned up and Sheamus fighting out of a chinlock but getting slapped in the face. He gets all fired up but has to get rid of Miz, allowing Cesaro to take him down with a fall away slam. Sheamus comes back with the middle rope shoulder and a double tag brings in Ziggler and Miz.

Dolph cleans house but the Fameasser is countered into a powerbomb. Ziggler counters that into a sunset flip and hits a running DDT for two. The power guys fall outside again but Miz runs from a Zig Zag attempt. He “tags” Sandow who goes in and takes the Zig Zag, allowing Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin on Dolph at 10:53.

Rating: C. The wrestling was fine but I’m digging Miz’s character more and more every week. They’re actually thinking with it and allowing him to use some of the stuff involved to make it even better. Having a makeup girl and stunt double are great ideas and something that a guy like him would have. The pin here wasn’t clean so it takes away some of the sting. Good stuff.

In case you somehow forgot it, here’s the Bellas’ segment from last week.

Now we get a segment called Growing Up Bella with Nikki talking about going to the prom with a guy she had liked for years. She saved up for months to buy the dress but Brie stole her date. Nikki has never told this to anyone so it must be very painful for her.

Rosa Mendes/Cameron/Eva Marie vs. Layla/Summer Rae/Naomi

The fans start a Randy Savage chant as the announcers tell us about 18 times that Total Divas season 3 debuts this Sunday. Layla and Rosa have a slow motion match to start but Cameron makes the save. A brawl breaks out and it’s a double DQ at 1:00.

We look at Rollins and Kane taking out Ambrose but not being able to do the same to Reigns last week.

Mark Henry/Big Show vs. Wyatt Family

They keep pushing the combined weight in this match, even though it’s the same weight as the other two times we’ve seen these teams fight. Henry runs Rowan over to start and sends him hard into the corner. Mark actually gets on the bottom rope to hammer away before splashing Erick in the other corner. The fans chant Sexual Chocolate as the slow beating continues. Harper breaks up a Vader Bomb attempt, allowing Rowan to knock him off the middle rope. A big boot gets two for Harper and we take a break.

Back with Henry and Rowan both trying big boots at the same time before it’s back to Harper for some choking. Lana and Rusev come out for a distraction as Henry gets up an elbow in the corner. The lukewarm tag brings in Big Show to clean house but he goes outside and gets tripped into the barricade. Show barely beats the count back in but Harper kicks him down for two.

Rowan does his head vice for a bit before it’s back to Harper for some shots to the face. A superkick gets two and Rowan slams Big Show with ease. Show gets in a shot of his own and makes the tag to Henry. House is cleaned again and everything breaks down. Big Show and Rowan fight to the announcers’ table but Rusev comes in for the DQ at 11:21.

Rating: D+. WAY too long here, especially when you consider we’ve seen this match two times in the last few weeks, not counting the six man from last week. That’s one of WWE’s biggest problems: they keep airing matches over and over again and don’t understand why interest goes down every time.

Big Show clears the ring with a chair.

More Growing Up Bella, this time with Nikki talking about getting her driver’s license and having to drive Brie everywhere in the used car they were given by their grandmother. Then Brie stole the car and Nikki’s license and got in a wreck. Nikki got the blame because it was her license. Again, she’s never told anyone about this.

Michael Sam, the first openly gay NFL draft pick, has been given an invitation to Raw next week.

We look back at Lesnar vs. Cena, Lesnar and Heyman’s promo from last week, and Cena going nuts last week.

Here’s Heyman to talk about Cena overreacting since his loss. We get stills from Summerslam with Heyman talking about how Cena has stopped listening to reason. Cena can fight as hard as he wants, but you can take the entire locker room and multiply them by infinity and it won’t be as brutal as Lesnar at Night of Champions.

Jack Swagger vs. Curtis Axel

Colter is back. Swagger runs Axel over to start and WE THE PEOPLE, only to get hit in the ribs. Bo Dallas pops up on the stage with three chairs behind him. Axel hits a clothesline to the back of Swagger’s head as Dallas has two men and a woman from the crowd come sit in the chairs. Curtis dropkicks Swagger to the floor but Jack comes right back with the Patriot Lock for the submission at 2:30.

Post match Dallas introduces the three people who are all crushed by Swagger losing at Summerslam. One of the men is a farmer who bet $1000 on Swagger and then bet double or nothing on the rematch. Now the government is taking his farm. Next up is an immigrant that failed his citizenship test and is being deported back to Italy. Colter looks thrilled at that one. Next up is a woman whose son has been crushed by the loss. After the loss, her son wants to be like Vladimir Putin. All three agree to Bolieve.

Adam Rose vs. Titus O’Neil

Adam rolls around on the mat to start but Titus picks him up for a hard backbreaker. The bunny hops over to Slater and gets shoved down. Titus isn’t sure what to think but the bunny double legs Slater and beats the carrots out of him. Rose wins with a rollup at 1:51.

More Growing Up Bella. This time it’s about Brie barely graduating high school until Nikki took her exams for her.

The announcers hype up Attitude Week on the WWE Network.

Rusev vs. Zack Ryder

Lana makes fun of Labor Day before we get going. Ryder hammers away but the Rough Ryder is caught in a fall away slam. The jumping superkick sets up the Accolade for the submission at 0:54.

Post match Henry chases Rusev off. Henry says he’s scared of what he’d do if he got his hands on Rusev. Mark has opened an international wing of the Hall of Pain and Rusev is going to be the first inductee.

Stephanie says she can relate to the Growing Up Bella stories and says her door is always open for employees with problems. HHH is amused by this and says Stephanie is always helping people. Apparently they have an announcement for Nikki.

Here’s Stephanie to bring out Nikki for a chat. The fans are already calling this boring. Stephanie says the people know what it’s like to be in the shadow of those greater than them. Nikki has been through so much so Stephanie is making her #1 contender for the Divas Title.

This brings out Brie but Stephanie cuts the music, saying it now belongs to Nikki alone. Brie wants to know if this is what Nikki has wanted all along. Nikki says that it’s about her for once and that she sees right through everything Brie is doing. She can’t wait for Bryan to see it too. Nikki is going to be the next Divas Champions and the Bella that everyone is talking about.

This brings out AJ Lee to try to save this thing. AJ points out that there is only one contender and she never got a rematch. This brings out Paige who says there’s one thing missing from this talk about the Divas Title: the bloody Divas Champion. Nikki has a solution to this whole thing: she’ll forgive Brie if Brie will quit.

Brie looks annoyed so Nikki tells her to go back to the hole she and Bryan share in Washington to have troll babies. She screams at Brie that if she loves Nikki she’ll leave, but Brie pushes Nikki down, right into Paige. Brie leaves and the fans chant YES. AJ picks up the title but Stephanie tells her to hand it over….and AJ does just that.

Jericho vs. Wyatt in a cage is made for next week.

Bray wants to know how far a rat will go to outrun a serpent. Inside the cage, Jericho won’t be able to run.

Jimmy Uso vs. Goldust

The Dusts try to apologize for their actions but the Usos will have none of it. Jimmy takes Goldust down to start and hits a quick Samoan drop. The running Umaga attack connects and there’s the superkick but Stardust puts his brother’s foot on the ropes. The injured Jey goes after Stardust but gets kicked in the leg. Jimmy dives on Stardust, allowing Goldust to kick Jimmy in the head. The Final Cut gets the pin on Jimmy at 2:14.

Stardust crushes Jey’s bad leg against the post with a chair.

We look at Ambrose getting hurt again. Cole makes sure to point out that Kane and Rollins planned to have the blocks there. We also see Reigns fighting off both Authority members.

Preview of the new season of Total Divas, focusing on the Bellas of course.

Big Show congratulates Henry on chasing Rusev off but wants him to remember the team. Henry says he won’t, but he has to get Rusev. Show offers to be in his corner but Henry needs to do this by himself.

Chris Jericho/John Cena/Roman Reigns vs. Kane/Randy Orton/Seth Rollins

HHH and Stephanie are at ringside. Reigns and Orton get things going with Roman quickly winning a slugout. A big clothesline drops Randy but Reigns pulls Rollins into the ring instead. Seth bails outside and we take a break. Back with Reigns hitting a Samoan drop for two on Orton. Rollins comes in with a shot to Reigns’ head for two and we hit the chinlock. Off to Kane for a chinlock of his own as the fans are getting restless.

Back to Randy who stomps Reigns’ head for two and kicks him down to the mat. Reigns finally gets in a clothesline but the hot tag brings in Jericho to face Rollins. The Lionsault has Rollins in trouble and there are the Walls, only to have Orton make a save. There’s a Superman Punch for Randy but Kane comes in with a chokeslam. Cena AA’s Kane, only to take the springboard knee from Seth. Jericho rolls up Rollins for two but gets kicked in the head. A Codebreaker puts Rollins down and we take a break.

We come back to Jericho fighting out of a chinlock but Rollins sends him into the corner. Rollins hits a running forearm to put the Canadian down and goes up top. Jericho pops up though and dropkicks Seth out of the air in a nice counter. Kane breaks up a hot tag attempt and puts on a chinlock of his own.

Jericho fights to his feet but dives into an uppercut for two. Orton can’t superplex Chris and gets knocked off the top, setting up a high cross body for two. Kane breaks up yet another tag attempt but Jericho nails him with a forearm and makes the real hot tag to Cena (BIG reaction for that). John cleans house and hits an AA on Kane before tagging out to Reigns for the spear and the pin at 22:54.

Rating: C+. This was the standard long match to end a bad show. Cena not getting to come in until the very end was a nice idea and let him explode all at once. Kane taking the fall was pretty clear and there’s nothing wrong with that. This was nothing special though and felt like a house show main event more than anything else.

Cena gets in HHH’s face and AA’s Rollins through the table.

Ads for Michael Sam, Jericho vs. Wyatt in a cage and Orton vs. Reigns close the show. Did I mention Monday Night Football is back next week?

Overall Rating: D. And that’s being generous. Ignoring how horrible the Bellas’ story and acting has been, there was WAY too much focus on that one story all night. This show basically had three stories on it: the Bellas, the World Title and Henry vs. Rusev. The rest was almost all window dressing and that makes for a very long three hours. The show is just so uninteresting right now and the Bellas are a huge part of it. Inviting Michael Sam and then showing his picture on a graphic that says NEXT WEEK is there to deceive people rather than entertain them. It makes the company look lost and that’s not good. Horrible show.

Results
Miz/Cesaro b. Sheamus/Dolph Ziggler – Skull Crushing Finale to Ziggler
Rosa Mendes/Cameron/Eva Marie vs. Layla/Summer Rae/Naomi went to a double DQ when all six started brawling
Mark Henry/Big Show b. Wyatt Family via DQ when Rusev interfered
Jack Swagger b. Curtis Axel – Patriot Lock
Adam Rose b. Titus O’Neil – Rollup
Rusev b. Zack Ryder – Accolade
Goldust b. Jimmy Uso – Final Cut
John Cena/Roman Reigns/Chris Jericho b. Kane/Seth Rollins/Randy Orton – Spear to Kane

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We opened with the Hall of Fame forum and this was a mess. It came off like three old guys just chattering and didn’t really get any point across. Basically only Hogan thinks Cena has a chance in the rematch but they all love him. The best thing that can be said about this is Flair didn’t embarrass himself, which is a rare sight (though he’s been on better behavior as of late).

Cena came out near the end and did his serious voice about how he’s ready for the rematch, though it’s about the norm for him. I’m not sure what they can do for Night of Champions that they didn’t do for Summerslam, but the question of how Cena can make this one closer might be enough to work. I’ll give them this: they’re making me have more sympathy for Cena, which seems to be the goal.

Nitro is coming to the Network. All this does is make me mad that it wasn’t available when I was reviewing the old episodes.

Rusev beat Swagger via referee stoppage in another entertaining match. I like what I’m seeing with Swagger, but someone is going to have to explain the idea behind pushing him by having him lose every match. At least he isn’t tapping anymore. Bo Dallas mocked Swagger after the break to get us to the real point of the thing.

Cesaro beat RVD in a quick match to become #1 contender for the US Title. Why this wasn’t the Summerslam match is beyond me. Cesaro vs. Sheamus should be good. I know this because I’ve seen them fight 384 times.

Paige finally beat Natalya, thereby making the previous losses look worthless. Post match Paige came out and did the semi-lesbian stuff which won’t go anywhere but will spawn a million fanfics.

Kane and Rollins eulogized Dean Ambrose. There wasn’t much to this but it served as a way to get Roman Reigns vs. Rollins started. Reigns broke things up to defend Dean’s honor and got a handicap match as a result, because that’s what the Authority does in WWE.

The Usos lost to the Dusts via countout due to Jimmy banging up his knee. The Dusts turned heel in a post match beatdown on the injured Uso. Those two as heels actually works and will make the promos sound a lot less comical. Also it gives the twins a team to feud with other than the Wyatts, which they’ve been lacking for a good while. How have the Usos been champions for six months? It seems like they just got them.

Lesnar and Heyman did a pretaped promo on Cena. The pretapes are a good idea to keep Lesnar on TV without paying a fortune.

Dolph Ziggler beat Damien Mizdow in a short match. Just story advancement for the next match with Miz.

Now we get to the big segment of the night as the Bellas had a sitdown interview. Brie tried to make up but Nikki (in a skin tight black dress) said every stupid thing she could think of about Brie, ranging from Brie stealing her boyfriends to Brie has an ugly husband to wishing Brie died in the womb. Nikki then shoves Brie down as Brie cried and slapped Jerry Lawler off camera.

The segment, as you can imagine, was cringe worthy. The Bellas can’t act and the things Nikki was saying were more laughable than emotional. Who cares that Brie did something when they were like 15? Stay on the point about Brie abandoning Nikki because there’s an actual story there. Have Brie explain it and then Nikki can be all irrational. In other words, TELL A DECENT STORY. The fans still won’t care, but there would be less to complain about. The blowoff match is going to be horrible.

Roman Reigns beat up Kane and Rollins until Seth brought in the briefcase for the DQ. They tried a Curb Stomp on more cinder blocks but Reigns beat then up again, sending Rollins running scared.

Los Matadores beat Slater and O’Neil. The losers had issues after the match and there’s a slight hint of Slater turning face. Again, I’ve heard worse ideas.

Bo Dallas beat Kofi and then got beaten up by Swagger. More story advancement.

Then we get to the part of the show that got on my nerves worst. Cena basically squashed Bray Wyatt before the Wyatts saved their leader. Then Cena squashed the whole Wyatt Family while Big Show and Mark Henry were in the same general area. Of all the people they have on the roster, Cena had to beat up Bray like that? You can’t put him in there with Harper or Rowan in the first place and have one of them get beaten up that badly? It’s the point of having lackeys: you can keep the big name from taking that big of a beating.

This goes to show you how thin the top of the roster is right now. The heels are all with the Authority and there really isn’t anyone outside of the Wyatts that you can put in this spot. Del Rio would have been perfect, but with him goen, there really was just Bray and company. WWE might have to, gulp, elevate someone before this becomes a bigger problem. Odds are that won’t happen though because WWE.

Raw wasn’t very good on Monday and a lot of that is due to how thin the roster is. With the Authority, Jericho, Ambrose and Orton all gone for the week, the wrestling was a lot thinner than it should have been. They really need some fresh blood at this point and the people are there to elevate if they would ever freaking do it. Unfortunately they seem terrified of that concept and the show gets stale in a hurry.

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We’re getting away from Summerslam now and the main story is Cena vs. Lesnar III has been announced for Night of Champions. Cena is back tonight and gets to address the situation for the first time on TV after Summerslam. We also have a Hall of Fame forum with people like Hogan, Flair and HBK talking about the upcoming match. Let’s get to it.

We’re opening with the Hall of Fame forum so here are Flair, Hogan and Shawn to get things going. Cole recaps the Summerslam match with Lesnar vs. Cena and asks Shawn first about the rematch. Shawn thinks Cena doesn’t have a chance and thinks it might be time for Cena to give it up. Hogan disagrees and thinks Cena can still go. Flair sides with Shawn and thinks Cena is the franchise, but doesn’t want to see John vs. Lesnar again.

Hogan says Hustle, Loyalty and Respect is the real Cena and hopes Cena wins. Flair agrees and Shawn says that they all like Cena but no one thinks he has a chance. Hogan brings up the match at Extreme Rules and says you can never rule Cena out, but Shawn says no one can take a beating like that. Flair doesn’t think Hogan believes that and here’s Cena for a rebuttal.

Cena says everyone in the WWE Universe thinks he has no chance and now a group of WWE Hall of Famers think the same thing. John talks about the respect he has for all three men in the ring with him, including saying there would be no Cena without Hulk Hogan. Cena was at Summerslam and felt every one of those suplexes. There is no way around this: Summerslam was a beating and a 100% beatdown. He addresses Shawn saying this can’t happen again and Cena says he won’t do it again. Instead he’ll take the fight to Lesnar and is ready for Night of Champions.

The first 100 hours of Nitro is coming to the Network next week. That would be about 1995/1996 or so.

Rusev vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger takes it right to him to start and grabs an early Patriot Lock, sending Rusev out to the floor. Back in and Swagger takes Rusev down before heading outside again. Rusev goes face first into the announcer’s table but he sends Swagger ribs first into the ropes back inside. We take a break and come back with Swagger fighting out of a bearhug but walking into a spinwheel kick. Swagger nails a belly to belly suplex to get a breather and follows up with a Vader Bomb. Rusev gets his foot up but gets caught in the Patriot Lock. He bites his hand to fight the pin but crawls over to the ropes.

Back to the floor with Rusev ramming him back first into the apron a few times. The Accolade is countered into the Patriot Lock again but Jack has to settle for a jackknife cover for two. The jumping kick to the ribs puts Swagger down and Rusev pounds away in the corner. Rusev shouts a lot but Swagger comes back with WE THE PEOPLE! The beating on the ropes continues and Swagger is in big trouble. The referee checks on swagger but Rusev keeps stomping. A hard standing kick to the chest drops Jack again and the referee stops it at 11:35.

Rating: C+. Well that happened. It’s basically the same thing we saw at Summerslam. The match was entertaining but they can’t have Rusev lose so Swagger continues to get beaten over and over. In theory we’re setting up Cena vs. Rusev as the ultimate American vs. foreigner showdown but we don’t need Swagger to lose over and over again to get there. It’s the same issue he’s had for months now: he loses over and over again despite getting close. Eventually you don’t buy the close matches and they’re just waiting for the ending.

After a break, Swagger is getting his ribs looked at when Bo Dallas comes in. He says Swagger let his country down again, but all he needs to do is Bo-lieve.

Cesaro vs. Rob Van Dam

The winner gets Sheamus (on commentary) for the US Title, presumably at Night of Champions. Good to see that Van Dam is fine after getting DDT on concrete on Smackdown. Rob spins around to start and superkicks Cesaro into Rolling Thunder for two. Cesaro comes back with a right hand in the corner and we hit the cravate on Rob for a bit. A kick to the face drops Cesaro and sets up the split legged moonsault for two. The springboard kick to the face looks to set up the Five Star but Cesaro rolls to the floor. Back in and Cesaro picks up Rob for the Neutralizer and the pin at 3:38. It’s as abrupt as it sounds.

Rating: D+. The ending really hurt this as Cesaro just got back into the ring, kicked Rob in the ribs and Neutralized him for the title shot. Also, I have some issues with Rob beating Cesaro clean at Summerslam but then losing a match here to give Cesaro a title shot that easily. Why not have this match at Summerslam? The time and ending dragged this down a lot.

Post match Cesaro picks up the US Title and throws it back at Sheamus after a few seconds.

Network hype.

Natalya vs. Paige

Non-title again. Natalya gets a quick rollup for two but Paige nails her with a clothesline. They trade abdominal stretches before Natalya hooks a release German suplex. There’s the Sharpshooter but Paige crawls over to the ropes. Paige can’t hook the PTO and Natalya tries another Sharpshooter, only to get kicked in the face. The Paige Turner is good for the pin at 2:56.

AJ comes skipping out for a distraction and Natalya nails a discus lariat. The fans don’t react because that’s a very heelish thing to do after she got beat. AJ gets in the ring and helps Paige up, saying she’s sincere. She hugs Paige, freaking the champion out a bit. Now it’s a handshake offer but AJ has to lean over to grab her hand. She even kisses Paige’s hand and skips around a bit before leaving.

Kane introduces Seth Rollins to deliver Dean Ambrose’s eulogy. Rollins says he was the leader of the Shield. On to Dean, fear was never a factor for him. We get a clip of the match from last week with the Curb Stomp onto the conveniently placed cinder blocks. Rollins is curious about what went through Dean’s head as it was going down onto those blocks. How did Ambrose feel when he knew he was outmatched?

The blocks were there on purpose but Rollins wants to know what would have happened if Ambrose had known his place. As far as Rollins is concerned, he doesn’t think we’ll be seeing Ambrose again. He says he created the Shield….so here’s Roman Reigns. Kane goes after him and is easily sent into the steps. Reigns goes after Rollins but Kane makes the save and bails.

We look at the Hall of Fame forum again.

Goldust and Stardust want the Tag Team Titles and get their shot tonight.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust

The Usos are defending and we get some big match intros. Stardust rolls Jimmy up for two to start but Jimmy does the same to him. It’s off to the arm work for a bit to give Stardust another two count. The champions are sent to the floor with the Dusts nailing big dives to take them down again. Back from a break with Jimmy fighting out of a chinlock from Stardust. Off to Goldust and both guys try cross bodies, setting up a double hot tag. Jey hammers on Stardust and knocks him out to the floor. A huge dive takes Stardust down but Jey hurts his knee and can’t get back in, drawing a countout at 7:40.

Rating: C-. This was starting to get good at the end but the countout stopped that cold. That’s two straight losses for the Usos against this team but they keep the titles against. That sounds like the start of a heel turn but it’s not how it’s coming off. Instead it’s more like they’re just kind of inept.

Post match Goldust says the Usos got counted out on purpose. They want to keep going and the Dusts turn evil by attacking the injured Uso. I’ve heard worse ideas.

Rollins is annoyed at Reigns so Kane uses the old standard handicap match.

We get a sitdown interview with Lesnar and Heyman. Brock says he came back to conquer the world and that’s what he did. He gave Cena an F5 right off the bat, allowing Cena to have the chance to quit. Instead Cena kept going and took a horrible beating. Heyman calls Cena challenging Brock to a rematch a horrible decision. Brock imitates Cena’s dad and talks about how he’ll have the chance to be a man….and then Brock Lesnar appeared. The idea of what’s coming to Cena at Night of Champions almost brings a tear to Brock’s eye.

Dolph Ziggler vs. The Miz

Non-title. Miz comes out in street clothes and talks about not having to wait in line at Disneyland this morning. As for his match tonight, he’ll be stepping out for his stunt double.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Mizdow

Sandow is of course dressed as Miz. An early dropkick gets two for Ziggler but Sandow, now in all black, comes back with a clothesline and dropkick to the knee. He puts on the Figure Four (on the proper leg) but Ziggler turns over pretty quickly. Back up and the Zig Zag is good for the pin at 2:25.

It’s time for the third big in ring segment of the night as Lawler is hosting a Bella Twins reconciliation. We get a clip of Nikki saying Brie has cost them all their success and the big slap. Nikki comes out first in a tight black dress and moves her chair across the ring. Here’s Brie as well, again in her Brie Mode shirt. Brie gets all serious and asks Nikki to forgive her because this is bigger than WWE or Total Divas. Nikki doesn’t buy it and says she knows the real Brie.

She accuses Brie of holding her back and is sick of the family treating Brie better. Nikki insults Brie’s hair and her save the Earth lifestyle. This brings Nikki to the troll faced husband and how sick she is of supporting a sister that never cared about her. Nikki says Brie stole all her boyfriends when they were younger and the fans are really not interested.

We FINALLY get to the point of this: Brie quit and left Nikki alone to get beaten up week after week because she cared about getting herself over more than her sister. Brie starts crying and Lawler tries to intervene so Nikki tells the old man to get out. She wishes Brie died in the womb and throws her out of the chair. The beating is on until Lawler breaks it up. Nikki slaps him off camera and the referees finally make the save.

Hall of Fame forum again.

Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins/Kane

Kane is knocked over the top almost immediately and Reigns goes after Seth. The monster gets back up and helps his partner to take over but Rollins is backdropped to the floor. Reigns hammers on Kane in the corner and nails the apron kick for good measure. The Superman Punch is countered but Reigns hits the spear, only to get nailed with the briefcase for the DQ at 2:40.

The beating continues post match and Kane has more cinder blocks ready at ringside. Reigns is able to fight out of it though and Superman Punches Rollins instead. Kane is sent “into” the post (clearly missing by a good six inches) and Roman picks up a cinder block. It hits the post instead of Rollins’ head but the Superman Punch lays out Kane. Rollins bails and looks terrified.

Bray Wyatt thinks Cena’s shell is cracked after his fight with Brock Lesnar. He’ll put Cena out of his misery tonight. It’s nicer on the other side.

Los Matadores vs. Heath Slater/Titus O’Neal

Before the match, Slater and Titus argue over which superhero they both are. Diego hits a quick spinning cross body for two on Slater, allowing Fernando to come in with a slingshot hilo for two more. Back up and a hurricanrana sends Slater down, setting up an armbar. Slater finally gets in a shot to the face and makes the taag off to Titus for some backbreakers. Heath reluctantly comes back in for a chinlock and a clothesline before tagging out. The makeshift team keeps hammering away until Diego grabs a crucifix for the pin on Slater out of nowhere at 4:00.

Rating: D. Another dull match here but it’s kind of nice to have a match instead of a long talking segment in the ring. Slater and O’Neil are fine for a thrown together tag team, though I wouldn’t mind them winning a match. Or a better name than Slater Gator. I’m also shocked that Los Matadores lasted this long.

Hall of Fame forum x4.

Kofi Kingston vs. Bo Dallas

Kofi fires off kicks and a rollup to start. Bo comes back with a running knee to the ribs but Kofi does his mounted punches in the corner. Dallas avoids a charge in the corner and hits the Bodog for the pin at 1:40.

Bo says his usual post match but Swagger comes in and slams him.

John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray just appears in the ring instead of doing an entrance. We don’t even get the lantern shot. Cena takes him right into the corner to start and nails him with a hard running clothesline. A German suplex puts Bray down again and Wyatt looks shocked. Another German suplex does the same and Bray is in trouble. John hammers on Bray in the corner and hits a hard running knee to the head as this is totally one sided. There’s another German suplex but Bray elbows out of a fourth. There’s a running splash in the corner but Cena takes him down and hammers away, drawing in Harper and Rowan for the DQ at 4:28.

Rating: D+. I get the idea here but I REALLY don’t like them doing this to Wyatt when he’s coming off a big win at Summerslam. I mean….do this to Rowan or Harper but leave Wyatt himself out of something like that. The match could have been worse and the story makes sense, but it should have been against someone who could absorb a loss like this. Del Rio would have been perfect had he not bailed.

Big Show and Mark Henry run out and I smell a six man after the break.

Big Show/Mark Henry/John Cena vs. Wyatt Family

Joined in progress after a break with Big Show dropping an elbow on Rowan. Henry comes in off the top for more big man offense but gets nailed by Harper. We hit the chinlock for a bit before it’s back to Wyatt for some big right hands. Rowan slams Henry in an impressive power display but charges into a boot in the corner.

The hot tag brings in Big Show to clean house, only to have Harper dropkick him down. Rowan comes in and kicks Big Show as well before it’s back to Wyatt for the backsplash and two. Another kick to the face gets two for Harper but Bray gets another tag and walks into a chokeslam. The tag brings in Cena for German suplexes all around and the STF to make Harper tap at 6:55.

Rating: D+. There were some nice moments here from Cena with the power displays, but this might as well have been Cena in a handicap match. I get the idea and I’m MUCH happier with Harper taking a fall that isn’t going to hurt him as opposed to Bray, who has potential in the future. Not much to see here though as Cena getting the win was obvious.

All three Wyatts get AA’s post match.

Overall Rating: C-. It’s very clear that WWE cannot handle doing a three hour show every week with the talent roster they have right now. Between the CONSTANT replays and rematches, it’s clear that they just don’t have the depth to pull this off. The matches were mostly short too and stretching them out would have helped a lot. I’m not asking for Thesz vs. Funk here, but take those three minute matches and make them six minutes. It takes away the need for so many recaps to fill in time and gives you a better show. This wasn’t the worst episode ever, but it felt like it was dragging itself to a conclusion.

Results
Rusev b. Jack Swagger via referee stoppage
Cesaro b. Rob Van Dam – Neutralizer
Paige b. Natalya – Paige Turner
Goldust/Stardust b. Usos via countout
Dolph Ziggler b. Damien Mizdow – Zig Zag
Roman Reigns b. Seth Rollins and Kane via DQ when Rollins hit Reigns with the briefcase
Los Matadores b. Heath Slater/Titus O’Neil – Crucifix to Slater
Bo Dallas b. Kofi Kingston – Bodog
John Cena b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when the Wyatt Family interfered
John Cena/Big Show/Mark Henry b. Wyatt Family – STF to Harper

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In what almost has to be a rib, Stephanie (again looking gorgeous in jeans and a tight t-shirt) started the show to talk about Brie Bella. This led to Stephanie bringing out Nikki Bella to explain why she turned on her sister. It’s exactly what you would expect: she was angry at Brie for making everything about herself and abandoning her. Brie came out and did the big heartfelt plea to her sister and got slapped in the face for her efforts. In case you didn’t get this, don’t worry as this would air FOUR TIMES on Monday.

Here’s the thing and I’ve said it several times before: the majority of the fans do not care about the Bellas fighting over whatever their issue is. The match is going to be a disaster and the promos are going to be even worse, but the worst part is that this opened the show. With everything else that happened at Summerslam, this is what opened Monday Night Raw. Is it any shock that the ratings were down this week?

Big Show/Mark Henry beat the Wyatt Family in a pretty good power match. Erick Rowan slammed Big Show in a very impressive power display. Other than that this was the usual back and forth match that you would expect with Henry World’s Strongest Slamming Rowan for the pin. In theory this sets up the giants vs. the Usos and eventually Henry vs. Big Show because that’s how tag team wrestling works.

Ric Flair had a cameo with Dolph Ziggler. As long as that’s the extent of their association, I’m fine.

Seth Rollins was bragging about winning the lumberjack match but Dean Ambrose poured a bucket of ice water over his head. Ambrose: “It’s for charity!” A brawl ensued but didn’t go anywhere. After the break, the Authority made Rollins vs. Ambrose again for tonight with the fans picking the stipulations.

AJ cost Paige a win over Natalya (now wearing shorts) because that’s the only thing the writers know how to do.

The big segment of the show was HHH bringing out Lesnar and Heyman to present Brock with the new WWE World Title belt. Heyman’s promo was the usual awesome performance where he talked about Cena being a tough guy and THE guy for the last ten years, only to have him lose to Brock on Sunday. Lesnar conquered Brock Lesnar just like he should have done. Nothing much to say here but it was as good as you would expect it to be.

The Miz beat Dolph Ziggler via countout in a rematch for the Intercontinental Title. This seems to set up another match between them, but it’s nothing I want to see again.

Cesaro beat Jack Swagger in a short but intense match. The idea here is that Swagger is disappointing himself after his loss on Sunday. Bo Dallas came out post match and told Swagger to Bo-Lieve. I can dig Swagger vs. Dallas.

Jericho is still talking about Wyatt. A third match with a gimmick wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world.

RVD/Reigns/Sheamus beat Ryback/Axel/Orton. Again it seems like we’re setting up Orton vs. Reigns II with a gimmick and that’s not the worst idea in the world. Reigns didn’t get the pin for some reason, which you would think would be the right idea on a match like this. The only interesting thing in the match was Ryback getting a big hometown pop. I’d still love to see him get a nice push as a face again.

Orton threatened Flair after a break. Please, no more Flair.

Bray Wyatt declared himself the face of salvation.

Goldust/Stardust beat the Usos in a non-title match. Methinks we’re getting a multi-team match in the future.

Lana and Rusev talked and Mark Henry made the save. It’s not a good sign that they have Henry in two stories at the same time.

The main event was Ambrose vs. Rollins II in a falls count anywhere match. This was a great brawl with both guys beating the tar out of each other and a bunch of near falls. There was an insane spot with Rollins powerbombing Ambrose onto a pile of chairs for two. Kane interfered because that’s what he does anymore and cost Ambrose the match. It ended with Rollins hitting a Curb Stomp onto a conveniently placed stack of cinder blocks. The story after the show ended has Ambrose running away from medics and disappearing. It’s a way to let him make a movie because that’s more important than a hot feud on WWE TV.

Raw was a good but not great show as they set up some stuff for the next rematch PPV with gimmicks attached. Lesnar and Heyman were as awesome as ever and Heyman can more than carry the act in Lesnar’s absence. The return of Cena next week should be interesting and we get to hear some great promos along the way. This wasn’t the best followup show in the world but the fall looks so much better than last years.

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Last night, evil won. Brock Lesnar is the new WWE World Heavyweight Champion and squashed John Cena in the process. That’s the only word to descirbe it. Lesnar massacred Cena with John getting in as much offense as the Brooklyn Brawler would have. The questions now are where in the world do we go from here and who could possibly stop Brock Lesnar? Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the entire show last night.

Here’s Stephanie to Daniel Bryan’s music coming down the aisle, because there’s nothing else to open the show right? There are new microphone cubes with the new logo. She talks about how important last night was before promising a new title belt for Brock Lesnar tonight. The Authority wishes Cena a speedy recovery, but there are other people who have injuries to heal from. There’s also Chris Jericho and Dean Ambrose, but the biggest loser of them all is Brie Bella.

However, she can’t take all of the credit because she has to thank HHH. Stephanie thanks him for what he did last night but also has to thank Brie’s sister Nikki. This brings out Nikki who hugs Stephanie, basically erasing all of the beatings that Stephanie has caused. Nikki talks about the Bellas coming to the WWE and saying it was them against the world. However, it’s always been about Brie, even back to when they were kids.

She’s sick of hearing Brie tell her she’s never going to have a husband (storyline from Total Divas), even though she didn’t have to marry Daniel Bryan. Nikki feels free now that she’s standing on her own two feet, but here’s Brie with a rebuttal. Brie talks about sisterly love and how Nikki has destroyed their family. Nikki says Brie destroyed it and slaps her, sending Brie crying to the back.

Back from a break and we look at the slap again.

Wyatt Family vs. Big Show/Mark Henry

Henry hammers on Rowan to start but runs into an elbow. It’s quickly off to Harper who gets yelled at and headbutted into the corner. More headbutts stagger Harper and it’s off to Big Show for the loud chop. Some shots the ribs have Harper in even more trouble and his shots have almost no effect. Big Show cleans house and sends Harper outside as we take a break.

Back with Luke snapping Big Show’s throat across the top rope to take over. Rowan tries to help but gets caught trying a low bridge. The distraction works though as Harper kicks Big Show out to the floor. Off to Rowan who kicks Big Show in the face on the floor as the evil monsters take over. Back in and Harper wins a minor slugout before Rowan throws Big Show into a superkick for two.

Harper actually Gator Rolls Big Show before putting on a chinlock. Rowan comes back in and clotheslines Big Show before slamming him with ease. I mean he turned Show upside down and had time to move his arm around Big Show’s head. Big Show pops up (to be fair it was just a slam) and catches Rowan with a DDT. The hot tag brings in Mark Henry and everything breaks down. Luke breaks up the World’s Strongest Slam with a big boot to Rowan’s back but Big Show comes in and KO Punches both guys. A World’s Strongest Slam to Rowan is enough for the pin at 11:46.

Rating: C+. Good match here with both teams working hard and showing off some very good power stuff. That slam from Rowan made my eyes go big though as he doesn’t get to show off that much. I’m not wild on the Wyatts doing another job like this but it’s something you have to expect from time to time.

Ric Flair congratulates Ziggler for winning the Intercontinental Title. Miz comes in and says he’s going to take the title back tonight.

We recap the lumberjack match before going to Rollins in the back. Rollins talks about how he knew he could beat Ambrose and that’s exactly what he did. He says he’s the future WWE World Heavyweight Champion as well as the future of the entire WWE. Ambrose comes up behind him with a bucket of ice water. Ambrose: “IT’S FOR CHARITY!” My goodness it’s a modern reference in WWE. A brawl breaks out and is quickly broken up.

After a break Rollins rants to the Authority and is given a rematch against Ambrose tonight. The WWE Universe will get to pick the stipulations.

Paige vs. Natalya

Non-title and Natalya is now in shorts. Paige talks about how much she respects and loves AJ, even dedicating the match to her. Feeling out process to start and they quickly trade backslides. Paige escapes hers though and kicks Natalya in the back of the head to take over. She crawls on top of Natalya for the pop of the night before headbutting her without seeming to make much contact. Cue AJ skipping down to the ring, allowing Natalya to get a rollup win at 1:46.

AJ says that despite everything, she still respects and loves Paige. She offers to come in and shake Paige’s hand, sending Paige running to the floor.

The options for Ambrose vs. Rollins are:

No Holds Barred
Falls Count Anywhere
No DQ

HHH and Stephanie, now in a very low cut black dress after being in a t-shirt and jeans earlier, are out to unveil the new title. It’s the same design that Rock introduced a few years back but with the new logo and a bit shinier. The side plates are Brock’s skull tattoo. He brings out Brock Lesnar for the presentation and shakes his hand before posing for a photo op. A loud LESNAR chant starts up as HHH raises Brock’s arm.

Heyman slowly does his intro and says Cena isn’t here this evening. That basically gets a standing ovation. Heyman says Cena can’t be here because he can’t physically appear, thanks to Brock Lesnar. Brock is sitting on a stool with the biggest grin on his face, knowing no one can touch him.

Paul goes on a rant about how important Brock’s accomplishments last night were. Rock was on top for three years. Steve Austin (POP) was on top for three years. John Cena has been on top for TEN YEARS and was tough enough to stick around longer than thirty seconds last night. Heyman saw a look on Cena’s face last night and that was when he got it.

Cena’s speeches get on Heyman’s nerves but he kept coming back for more and more because he never gives up. Cena earned Heyman’s respect to the point where he would love to make John a Paul Heyman Guy. If the history of WWE was written right before Brock pinned him last night, Heyman would be the hardest fighting champion in WWE history.

However, Brock doesn’t agree with these views. In Lesnar’s universe, street cred doesn’t matter. In Brock’s universe, he who dies with the most street cred still dies. The Undertaker’s career and Streak died at Lesnar’s hands and the concept of hustle, loyalty and respect and the Cenation died at Lesnar’s hands.

The same thing is happening to anyone who comes to take the WWE Title from Brock Lesnar. Heyman sums up the match last night: Suplex, repeat, suplex, repeat, suplex, repeat, suplex, repeat, suplex, repeat. Lesnar lives by the motto of Eat, Sleep, Conquer Repeat, but now it’s Eat, Sleep, Conquer John Cena. Another awesome promo here from Lesnar and they were right to not have anyone come out here.

Here’s Nikki slapping Brie again.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Dolph is defending after beating Miz for the title last night. This actually gets big match intros. A hiptoss puts Miz down for two and Dolph puts on a headlock. Miz goes after the knee and stomps away in the corner. He wraps the leg around the post and Ziggler is in trouble as we take a break.

Back with Ziggler getting two off a sunset flip and hitting the running DDT for the same. Miz comes right back with a shot to the knee and puts on the Figure Four. Dolph dives to the ropes and rolls outside for a breather. Miz reaches out for Dolph but gets rammed into the apron. Dolph gets kicked away though and that’s a countout at 7:20.

Rating: D+. Last night I said that Dolph was going to start losing a lot more because he was the Intercontinental Champion, and apparently I was absolutely right. It wasn’t a pin, but man alive does this feud really need to continue? The match wasn’t the worst in the world but these two have fought enough already.

Post match Dolph lays him out with the Zig Zag.

Jack Swagger is disappointed in his loss last night and failed his country last night. However, We The People is about coming together when times get tough. He’s going to do what any Real American should do and get back up.

Jack Swagger vs. Cesaro

Swagger is here alone. Cesaro starts with a gutwrench suplex on the bad ribs and it’s quickly off to the abdominal stretch. He switches off to an armbar and Swagger comes back with a big boot and the Vader Bomb. Cesaro drapes the bad ribs over the ropes but his running big boot is caught in the Patriot Lock while Swagger is still on the apron. Back in and Cesaro pokes the eye, setting up the Neutralizer for the pin at 4:40.

Rating: D+. Well at least Cesaro won. I’m not sure where they’re going with this character with Swagger, but it’s nice to see him getting a push instead of just stagnating like he was. Cesaro getting the pin is another good thing to see, even if it’s in a pretty meaningless match. At least it was short.

Post match Cesaro laughs at Swagger until Bo Dallas comes out. He talks about the 318 million Americans that Jack let down. Swagger has lost everything, but he just has to Bo-Lieve to get it all back.

Chris Jericho says he’s never seen anyone like Bray Wyatt. The Spider Walk is one of the most disturbing things he’s ever seen. There’s nothing behind Bray’s eyes though and when he told Jericho that he was already dead, Jericho knew it was a lie. He has three things Bray will never have: a fire burning inside him, a fighting spirit and the best fans in WWE history.

Randy Orton/Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. Rob Van Dam/Roman Reigns/Sheamus

Sheamus runs over Axel to start but Axel nails him in the ribs before bringing in Orton. Off to Van Dam who kicks Randy down and hits a quick Rolling Thunder to send Orton to the floor and us to a break. Back with Sheamus hitting the ten forearms to Axel’s chest before doing the same to Ryback. Orton low bridges Sheamus to the floor and the heels take over again. Sheamus is sent over the timekeeper’s table as the fans chant FEED MORE ME and RYBACK RULES for the hometown guy.

Randy makes a big deal out of tagging Ryback in and the Big Guy is ready for the task for once. Ryback drives shoulders into the ribs in the corner before putting Sheamus in a front facelock. There’s a delayed vertical suplex for two and it’s back to Orton. Sheamus backdrops out of the Elevated DDT and it’s hot tag to Reigns so house can be cleaned. The apron kick nails Axel and it’s Superman Punches for the tag team.

Orton breaks up the spear with a backbreaker but Reigns tags in Van Dam who cross bodies Axel for two. The split legged moonsault gets the same and everything brekas down. A Brogue Kick drops Ryback but an RKO puts Sheamus down. Reigns is sent into the post but RVD kicks Axel down and the Five Star gets the pin at 11:10.

Rating: C. Not bad here but I’m not sure why you would have Van Dam get the pin instead of Reigns. I get not having Reigns pin Orton again but he can’t get a win over someone like Curtis Axel? The match was fine and the ending was better than most of the rest of the match. It was fine and about the right length too.

We recap the ice bucket thing from earlier.

Orton is walking in the back when Ric Flair comes up. Randy threatens to beat him up and Flair stares at him.

Bray Wyatt says he was riding on a pale horse to come after Chris Jericho last night. He warned Jericho that this was coming and he certainly is a man of his word. Jericho claims that he looked in Bray’s eyes last night and saw nothing. Maybe Chris is right. Maybe Bray doesn’t have a soul and the only purpose he has on this earth is to collect. Jericho may never be able to comprehend what he is. Bray declares himself the new face of salvation. Follow the buzzards.

We see the slap for the fourth time.

Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust

Non-title. Goldust and Jey start things off with Jey grabbing a quick rollup for two. Jimmy comes in and dances a bit before starting on the arm. It’s off to Stardust who gets forearmed in the face in the corner as this is one sided so far. Jey cranks on a chinlock for a good while until Stardust escapes into a sunset flip for the pin out of nowhere at 5:52.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work all that well and I really don’t like a second champion losing in a single night. I’m also not sure where we’re going with the Usos as they haven’t appeared in awhile but now we have the Dusts and Big Show/Mark Henry ready for a title match. Oh wait: triple threat it is I guess.

Lana and Rusev come out to brag but Mark Henry interrupts. Henry talks about representing the United States twice in the Olympic Games, and this is the only time he’s ever had a problem with anyone representing their flag. Last night what he saw got under his skin so he’s going to do something about it. Henry offers to give Rusev a guided tour of the Hall of Pain. The brawl is on with Henry laying Rusev out and Mark celebrating with everyone at ringside.

Preview of a documentary of the Shield coming to Summerslam.

We look back at Brock and Heyman from earlier.

Falls count anywhere wins the poll with 41% of the vote.

Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose

Falls count anywhere. Rollins wins an early slugout and they quickly fight into the crowd with Dean getting a two count. They go up by the stage and fight over various dangerous moves. Ambrose suplexes him down for two and takes it back to the ring. Dean throws in a bunch of chairs and slams both one of them and Rollins down at the same time. A middle rope elbow with the chair gets two but Rollins sends him face first into a chair in the corner for two.

Back with Rollins holding a Singapore cane around Dean’s face. He picks Ambrose up and knocks him into the ropes before ducking the Rebound Clothesline. An enziguri gets two on Dean and a tornado DDT gets the same on Seth. They slug it out from their knees and a catapult sends Rollins into the buckle. Dean hammers away with the Singapore Cane and uses it for a Russian legsweep for two. Ambrose throws in a pile of chairs and loads up a superplex, only to have Rollins counter into a running sitout powerbomb onto the chairs for TWO. Kane is at ringside and Rollins throws in a table.

Seth loads up a top rope Curb Stomp through the table but Dean pops up for a superplex to drive Rollins through instead. He has to go after Kane though and sends Rollins out to the floor. There’s the suicide dive to take both guys out and Kane is down. Back in and the Rebound Clothesline sets up Dirty Deeds but Kane interferes AGAIN.

Ambrose sends Kane into the steps and backdrops Seth into the crowd. Kane is sent over the announcers’ table, allowing Dean to get a running start to dive over the barricade at Rollins. Dean loads up the announcers’ table but Kane breaks up Dirty Deeds and chokeslams Dean onto the table instead. A Curb Stomp onto the table (still didn’t break) knocks Dean silly but Kane lists up another table to reveal a bunch of cinder blocks. Seth Curb Stomps Dean’s head THROUGH THE BLOCKS and Dean is done. The referee calls the match at 20:26.

Rating: A-. Now THAT was a brawl. It took awhile to get going but the stuff after the break was the war that it was supposed to be. This is the match that they should have had last night, though the injury angle keeps things going in a few months. That ending spot was insane though and will likely write Dean off TV long enough to make a movie that no one is going to see because WWE is about entertainment and not wrestling.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked the show but as usual, it needed to be an hour (and two slap replays) shorter. Brock not having a challenger yet is fine as Cena will return next week to probably set up their rematch. The rest of the show set up a few new things while also bringing up some rematches for Night of Champions. It’s a good show though and a nice followup to last night’s really good pay per view. The wrestling wasn’t great but the stories were, and that’s what people have been concerned about lately.

Results
Mark Henry/Big Show b. Wyatt Family – World’s Strongest Slam to Rowan
Natalya b. Paige – Rollup
The Miz b. Dolph Ziggler via countout
Cesaro b. Jack Swagger – Neutralizer
Sheamus/Rob Van Dam/Roman Reigns b. Curtis Axel/Ryback/Roman Reigns – Five Star Frog Splash to Axel
Goldust/Stardust b. Usos – Sunset flip to Jey
Seth Rollins b. Dean Ambrose via referee’s stoppage

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Heyman and Lesnar opened things up and talked about how Brock conquered the Streak and will conquer John Cena at Summerslam. People said he couldn’t beat the Undertaker and now they’re saying the same about Cena. Heyman acknowledged the loss at Extreme Rules 2012 and blamed it on Brock’s illness. That’s not the worst excuse but I don’t think it needed to be brought up. It’s not a bad thing but it didn’t need to happen either. The best part about this though was Heyman’s rhyming, which print doesn’t do justice. Find it on Youtube as it’s worth watching for how serious he plays it. Solid opening promo here but did you expect anything else?

Corporate Kane gave Roman Reigns a handicap match against Ryback/Axel with Reigns winning via DQ. I get the idea of it being a hit from the Authority, but since Reigns fought them off and laid both guys out after the match, what was the point of the DQ?

Orton taunted Kane, and apparently grew about four inches in the process. Seriously he was at Kane’s forehead.

Seth Rollins beat RVD in a nice match that you expect from Van Dam anymore. Post match Ambrose popped out of one of Hogan’s presents and chased off Rollins in a cool moment.

Now we get to the stupid part of the show: rehashing the Clair Lynch story from TNA. Short version: Bryan is sleeping with his physical therapist and Stephanie taunted Brie about it. Brie slapped the therapist and beat up Stephanie, earning her an arrest later in the show. Here’s the thing: Bryan isn’t advertised for Summerslam, despite this being the way to bring him into the story.

There’s a very simple way to get Bryan involved in this and it’s called have him stand in the corner and clap. Let me repeat that in case it went over people’s heads. Daniel Bryan can best be utilized in this story by having him stand in Brie Bella’s corner and clap. For the life of me I do not understand why this REALLY basic match and angle have been turned into some huge story involving infidelity and Brie trying to do something historic (still waiting to find out what that is). Have Bryan stand in the corner while Stephanie beats up Brie until Bella puts her in the YES Lock and makes her tap out. It should take twelve minutes counting entrances and celebration. Oh and it should NEVER CLOSE RAW OR BRING UP CLAIR LYNCH EVER!

Jack Swagger beat Cesaro in a good match. How in the world did Jack Swagger wind up being the Shawn Michaels of the team? The Russians came out and did nothing.

Wyatt and Jericho had a sitdown meeting where they said about what you would expect them to say. I’m not sure why this was recorded in a room and not done in the ring.

Paige cost AJ a match against Eva Marie and read a bad poem about beating AJ after the match. What I don’t understand was why Eva was fine to roll AJ up but then was down like she had gotten beaten up. I know she sucks in the ring, but DEAR GOODNESS does she look good in those outfits.

Cena gave a long response to Lesnar with a focus on Lesnar not deserving the title because Brock is in this just for the money and thinks he deserves to be champion because he’s Brock Lesnar. As usual, Cena nails the hard sell like few others can. Fortunately for us, Heyman is one of the few that can hang with and even best Cena at this stuff. The match is going to be amazing too.

Miz got Dolph Ziggler counted out against Heath Slater. In other words, Paige got AJ pinned by Eva Marie. Same story twice in an hour.

Orton beat Sheamus in a good match. There weren’t any big storyline developments here. Just two high level guys having a thirteen minute match and making it entertaining. You can’t ask for much more than that.

Hogan’s birthday celebration was the big ending with a bunch of legends coming out. Lesnar came back but Cena saved the legends and posed with Hogan to end the show. This was fine, though I wouldn’t have minded it going longer.

Overall Raw was the usual good go home show for a big pay per view and I want to see the show more than I did before. Hogan’s stuff was exactly what it should have been and likely would have been bigger had it not been the Monday before Summerslam. It was a good night though and the best Raw in a few weeks. That’s good going into Summerslam, which has potential to be a very awesome event.

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Tonight is both the go home show for Summerslam as well as a special birthday celebration for the one and only Hulk Hogan. We’re scheduled to see some special guests and I’m assuming a bunch of retrospectives on Hogan’s career, which could make for some interesting moments. Other than that, Cena and Lesnar are both back so we should get some solid build for Sunday. Let’s get to it.

We open with a bunch of red and yellow presents on the stage for later.

Here are Heyman and Lesnar to get things going. Lesnar’s shirt now has REPEAT covered by a John Cena sticker. Heyman says Lesnar will be the next World Heavyweight Champion and says he’s going to give us a taste of his selling abilities. If he has to come out here and explain the beating that Cena is going to suffer on Sunday, then you’re missing the point. Lesnar is here to address Cena fans, because bad things happen to good people when they step into the ring with Brock.

We see stills from Wrestlemania of Lesnar breaking the Streak and the audience’s shock. Heyman brings up Brock getting rid of Rock for six months back in 2002 and sending Hogan out of the WWE as a rookie. That leaves Brock with John Cena. If you’re a fan of Cena, don’t miss Summerslam because it’s going to be the end of John Cena.

We get stills from Extreme Rules 2012 and Heyman blames the loss on Lesnar’s real life illness. That was Brock at 50% and Cena still got the beating of his life. This coming beating will be that of a Shakespearean tragedy. Heyman actually rhymes about Cena (“We can’t rap like you. I’m just Brock’s advocating Jew.”) and the loss on Sunday. Heyman is going to take the big man out to dinner now and they’ll be back home tonight.

Flo Rida and Werid Al Yankovic say Happy Birthday Hulk.

Here’s Reigns for his match but Kane interrupts. Kane is back to being corporate with the suit and says he’s Director of Wrestling Operations again. He says Reigns won his match against Kane (speaking in third person for some reason) last week and it was almost like beating two men. Therefore, let’s see him face two men tonight.

Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. Roman Reigns

Axel starts for the team and gets caught in a headlock before being shoved down to the mat. Reigns shoves him into the corner and it’s off to Ryback. It’s almost sad to see how far Ryback has fallen in the last two years. They slug it out a bit with Reigns getting the better of it, only to have Axel offer a distraction, allowing Ryback to powerbomb Roman down. We take a break and come back with Reigns fighting out of a Ryback chinlock before they head outside. Reigns gets posted a few times and that’s a DQ at 9:09.

Rating: D+. SERIOUSLY? You can’t have Ryback and Axel take a pin? Everyone else pins them but the next top star has to beat them by DQ? The match was boring on top of that as you were waiting on the big Reigns comeback but instead he wins by DQ. This one boggles my mind.

Post match Reigns beats both guys up because he’s Roman Reigns and they’re Ryback/Curtis Axel. Reigns says he’s never stolen anything from Orton but he’s taking everything on Sunday. When you knock a viper’s fangs down its shirt, it’s just a worthless little worm. Believe that.

Orton gets on Kane for losing last week and promises to get the job done on Sunday. Kane makes Orton vs. Sheamus tonight. Something odd here: Kane is supposed to be 6’10, meaning Orton has suddenly hit 6’8.

Rob Van Dam vs. Seth Rollins

The match that was supposed to happen last week. They fight into the corner to start with Seth in control, only to be countered on a whip. A clothesline puts Seth down and Rob nails a standing moonsault for two. They slug it out some more with Seth avoiding a charge in the corner before taking him down to the mat in a headlock. Back up and the rolling leg scissors gets two for Rob and the springboard kick to the face gets the same. Rollins rolls to the floor, only to get nailed by a baseball slide. The spinning kick to the apron misses though and we take a break.

Back with Rollins holding a headlock before sending Van Dam into the corner. Rob fights back with a BIG kick to send Rollins staggering. A quick slam sets up Rolling Thunder for another near fall, followed by a superkick for two. Seth jumps over Rob and kicks him in the ribs. The monkey flip is countered into the Curb Stomp for a fast pin on Van Dam at approximately 7:58.

Rating: C. The match was fast and not all that great. Van Dam is there to do one thing and it’s getting a bit boring to watch him do the same stuff over and over again. This was a shorter version of his usual stuff though and that makes for a more entertaining match than the fifteen minute versions.

Post match Rollins looks through Hogan’s presents and thinks Ambrose is in one of them. He realizes he’s being crazy and leaves but Dean pops out of the big box and beats Seth into the crowd. Dean says that the show costs $9.99 on Sunday and he’s going to get his money’s worth.

Here’s Stephanie who talks about how important her match with Brie is on Sunday. We see a picture of Daniel with his physical therapist, who happens to be in the crowd tonight. Stephanie has her come into the ring and the therapist (Megan) is crying. She says that she’s a victim in this and that she’s doing her best to get Bryan back into the ring because that’s what Daniel loves to do.

Megan cries even more and eventually says that she and Bryan have been having an affair. This brings out Brie to yell as Stephanie says that Megan was shouting YES after every physical therapy session. Brie slaps Megan and takes Stephanie down. She’s so mad that she puts on a horrible YES Lock and Stephanie makes a match between the two of them tonight.

Drew Brees, AJ Hawk and Aaron Rodgers (NFL superstars) wish Hogan a Happy Birthday.

Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger has taped up ribs. Cesaro takes him down with a quickly shoulder block but gets caught in the Rick Steiner powerslam/belly to belly for two. The bald guy comes back with a gutwrench suplex and an abdominal stretch. A middle rope ax handle has Swagger in trouble but he blocks another into a belly to belly. The fans are really not interested in what they’re seeing here.

Cesaro comes back by dropping Swagger’s ribs over the top rope and knocking him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with another abdominal stretch on Swagger, only for him to escape and nail a bad looking big boot. A Vader Bomb gets two but Cesaro kicks him in the face for two of his own. Cesaro gets two more off a middle rope backsplash before loading up the apron superplex.

Swagger picks him up and pulls him to the apron but Cesaro gets back inside. He loads up Swiss Death but drops Swagger down onto his knee instead. A low uppercut gets two but a double stomp is countered into a Patriot Lock attempt. Cesaro quickly makes the ropes and kicks Swagger in the ribs, only to get pulled off the top into the Patriot Lock for the tap out at 12:00.

Rating: C. This was….long. Cesaro has fallen through the floor over the summer and it’s really sad to see. I can live with Swagger getting the face push that he’s needed for years, but it’s sad to see it coming at the expense of someone with so much potential. The match was entertaining but didn’t need to last this long.

Post match Zeb says they’re calling this Sunday’s show Deportslam when they get rid of Rusev and Lana. They load up WE THE PEOPLE but the Ruassian flag comes down and we get the Russians.

Earlier today, Bray Wyatt and Chris Jericho sat down for an interview with Michael Cole. Bray immediately sends Cole out of the room and asks Jericho if he remembers his dreams as a child. Wyatt remembers the scared little boy who wanted to live up to his daddy. Can Jericho still see the disappointment in his dad’s eyes? Now Jericho can’t even save himself.

Bray knows a lot about Jericho but Jericho knows nothing about him. Everytime Bray tries to sleep, he hears the screams in his recurring nightmares. Never once did he claim to be a savior though, because he isn’t. The only thing he lives for is to help people that can’t help themselves. You can’t just whisper words anymore because you have to scream it until their ears bleed.

The only way to help someone is to hurt them. Bray has been around a long time and has hurt a lot of people. He isn’t sorry for it either because he has no conscience and doesn’t believe in Heaven or Hell. Bray hates everything this world has created because he’s a monster and the eater of worlds. The human race is lost and the pale horse is coming for Jericho at Summerslam. Bray’s smile will be the last thing he’ll ever see.

Jericho says he isn’t a savior, but after being here for fifteen years, he’s become a survivor. There are a lot of different faces of Chris Jericho, but he’s going to shove the buzzards right down Bray’s throat and leave him speechless. Jericho leaves and Bray laughs to end this rather creepy segment. Bray’s voice sounded higher here.

AJ Lee vs. Eva Marie

Non-title. AJ easily takes her down to the mat but here’s Paige to skip around the ring. As is always the case, the distraction lets Eva get a rollup pin at 1:07.

Post match Paige reads a poem about throwing AJ off the stage but wanting to punch her face. She’ll skip out of Summerslam with the title. What’s with all the rhyming tonight? AJ goes after Eva, who is down on the floor despite only being in a headlock for about twenty seconds.

Opening segment recap.

Here’s Cena for his response to Lesnar. He says his name is John Cena and he’s going to get mauled in six days, assuming you believe Paul Heyman. Lesnar is going to do a lot of things on Sunday but he will not win. He’s going to have to make Cena lose and John isn’t laying down for Brock Lesnar. Cena isn’t laying down because Lesnar doesn’t deserve this title. One day Cena is going to lose, but it won’t be on Sunday and we all know why.

Cena doesn’t like Brock because he’s an arrogant bully that cares about no one but himself. There has never been a more selfish man to ever set foot in the WWE locker room. This is a business, but Brock being arrogant doesn’t make him deserve this title. Cena talks about how he’s heard the fans cheer and he’s heard the fans boo. He’s been told he can’t wrestle and he’s heard dueling fan chants but he keeps coming out here with a smile on his face.

That brings up the question of when is it enough. When does he stop caring about the t-shirts, the hats and the wristbands and go nuts? This Sunday he’s facing a beast and that’s what he’ll become to keep this title out of the hands of Brock Lesnar. Paul Heyman told the fans earlier tonight that this is his house and the fans belong to him. That’s not what the title stands for and any idiot knows that this house belongs to the fans.

However, Cena will play along tonight. If this is Brock’s house, then there’s a stranger in his living room, so come try and kick him out. There’s no Lesnar so Cena makes fun of the disease Brock had a few years back. He says he has too many fingers so he’s giving Brock the middle one. After more waiting, Cena gives up and says he’ll conquer the conqueror. This Sunday the champ is here. Good promo from Cena here, but he has no chance.

Larry King wishes he was as tanned as Hulk and the country music band Florida Georgia Line wishes him Happy Birthday.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Brie Bella

Brie almost trips on the way to the ring but seems remarkably calm an hour after being told her husband is cheating on her. Stephanie comes out in her regular outfit from earlier and says we’re waiting for Summerslam. She shows us the slap to Megan and that’s grounds for pressing charges. Brie is arrested and Stephanie laughs a lot.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Heath Slater

Miz is standing on the announcers’ table and runs his mouth until JBL unplugs his microphone. That goes nowhere as Ziggler dropkicks Slater down. The big elbow drop gets two but Slater grabs a small package and nails a side kick for two. Miz brings up Cole being a former Miz fan and Cole has nothing to say. Ziggler nails some clotheslines but misses a charge, only to hit the Zig Zag. Miz comes in for a distraction but Ziggler catches him at ringside and sends him into the barricade. Somehow this isn’t a DQ and Slater wins by countout at 4:21.

Rating: D. This was more of an angle than a match and my goodness what is up with Slater getting this push? The match was barely there and another challenger loses going into his title shot at the big show. You know, because he just has to. Thankfully he’s the only one tonight but it’s such a common trend in WWE.

Another Zig Zag puts Slater down post match. To be fair Slater went after Dolph first.

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

It’s been awhile since we’ve seen the pale one and of course this is non-title. Sheamus sends him into the corner to start but Orton pounds him down to take over. Back up and Orton charges into a boot, followed by a not very hard slam. A middle rope knee drop gets two for Sheamus but Orton fights out of the ten forearms to the chest and we take a break.

Back with Orton holding a chinlock after backdropping Sheamus over the barricade during the break. Sheamus fights back and takes it to the floor, only to get dropped back first onto the announcers’ table. Back in and Sheamus nails a side slam to start his comeback. Orton fights back again and takes it outside but gets caught in the ten forearms on the way back in. The rolling fireman’s carry gets two but Orton counters the Irish Curse into the backbreaker for two.

There’s the Elevated DDT but Orton walks around instead of covering. Sheamus wisely rolls to the floor to avoid the RKO and comes back in with the slingshot shoulder. There’s the powerslam for two on Randy but Sheamus misses a charge and hits the buckle. Orton charges into boots and Sheamus goes up for the shoulder, only to dive into the RKO for the pin at 13:10.

Rating: B-. I always thought these two could have a good match and that’s what you saw here. I like the ending more than I thought I would have as it was something that Sheamus could have been trying instead of just giving him a stupid reason to go up. I don’t like a champion losing, but at least it’s to a bigger star. Good match.

Clip of a Cena vs. Lesnar special airing on the Network after Raw.

The roster is on the stage for Hogan’s birthday celebration. Your emcees for this event: Jimmy Hart and Gene Okerlund. And really, could it be anyone else? Gene brings out Hulk for a video on his career set to a song called Forever Young. There’s some cool old school stuff in there, including his original heel run with Blassie.

Back in the arena and the fans are going nuts for Hulk. Hogan says he’s speechless for the first time in his career but musters up a few words. Everyone has been giving Hogan presents today, and even Vince gave him a card with $9.99 in it. The fans are now chanting $9.99 whenever it’s said. Hulk talks about Hulkamania being a two way street and hopes that he’s been able to touch the fans’ lives almost as much as he’s touched their lives. Hogan loves the Hulkamaniacs and the WWE Universe…and here’s Flair.

Nothing happens but here’s Paul Orndorff, complete with his HORRIBLE 1995 theme songs, which is basically women shouting HE’S WONDERFUL in high pitched, opera style voices. We get the required appearance from the hometown boy Roddy Piper. No one is saying anything between these appearances, making it very much like Flair’s retirement ceremony from a few years back. Hall and Nash come out as well with Hall taking a survey (no one seems to remember that), saying that the fans want Hogan in Black and White. Hogan rips off the red and yellow to reveal an NWO shirt. Nash leads Happy Birthday….and here’s Lesnar.

Heyman asks Hogan what he’s going to do and calls him grandpa. Cena runs out and is ready to fight but Brock and Heyman bail. No contact or anything and we’re told that the Hogan birthday celebration will continue after the show on the Network…..for just $9.99! Ok they didn’t say that but it’s implied. Cena and Lesnar shout at each other to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was another show that would have been much better if they cut it down by an hour. That being said, I do want to see Summerslam more than I did earlier today. The Hogan stuff was decent enough, but it really would have been nice to see something earlier than 10:58. I was entertained, though it took awhile to wake me up at some points.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Ryback/Curtis Axel via DQ when Reigns was sent into the post
Seth Rollins b. Rob Van Dam – Curb Stomp
Jack Swagger b. Cesaro – Patriot Lock
Eva Marie b. AJ Lee – Rollup
Heath Slater b. Dolph Ziggler via countout
Randy Orton b. Sheamus – RKO

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The Authority opened the show and let’s get this out of the way: they plugged the Network and it’s $9.99 price ALL NIGHT LONG. Yeah it gets annoying, but at the same time, what are you expecting them to do? The company’s future depends a lot on that thing succeeding and the international release is going to help them out a lot. I don’t care for it either, but it’s something I can live with for the sake of the future.

The point of the promo was to set up the night’s festivities: Ambrose vs. Del Rio and Rollins vs. Van Dam in a Beat the Clock Challenge with the winner getting to pick the stipulation at Summerslam, Stephanie and Brie having a contract signing, and Orton being ticked off at Reigns for various reasons. Reigns came out and wanted to fight, but got a match with Kane instead.

Reigns beat Kane in a pretty weak Last Man Standing match. I don’t care for putting these matches together on the fly like this, especially when this would have been a better option for Battleground. Reigns beating another World Champion is a good thing, but Kane has really started to hit rock bottom on these things. He’s just there anymore and it’s getting hard to sit through.

We got the first of two videos on Brock vs. Cena. These were really well done and made Brock sound like a person instead of just a killing machine. That’s a good thing as it adds another level of character to him.

Mark Henry returned and destroyed Damien Sandow, who was playing an Oklahoma Sooner football player this week. I’m guessing this was a shot at JR and I really don’t mind it that much. It’s not like it was that insulting. It was just cheap heat.

Ambrose beat Del Rio in a long and not very good match. Del Rio beat on Ambrose’s bad arm for his usual good psychology but Ambrose hit Dirty Deeds with the other arm (his right arm) for the pin. That didn’t do much for me as it wouldn’t seem to matter which arm he used. This would be Del Rio’s last televised match in WWE and I can’t say I’m going to miss him that much.

Rusev beat Sin Cara on the App in his usual style. I have no idea why I’m supposed to care about that. Colter came out and did the usual back and forth with Lana before Rusev beat up Swagger.

Dolph Ziggler pinned Cesaro in a quick match while Miz talked trash. Nothing to see here.

Paige hopes AJ gets better soon. These segments are all so short that there isn’t much to talk about.

Goldust and Stardust beat Ryback and Curtis Axel because that’s what these teams do.

Kane took off his mask and gave it to the Authority. I really don’t care about this anymore given how many times it’s happened now.

Bray Wyatt got Luke Harper disqualified against Chris Jericho, meaning Harper is barred from ringside at Summerslam. Why this match got five minutes with all the other nonsense we had to sit through is beyond me, as these two seem capable of having a great fifteen or so minute match.

Diego beat Fandango again, but this time Hornswoggle got to dance with Torito and the girls. This is time that could have gone to Harper vs. Jericho.

Orton had very little to say about Roman Reigns.

Bo Dallas beat R-Truth with a quick rollup, making the loss last week seem meaningless.

Bray Wyatt said his usual schtick.

Another Lesnar vs. Cena video with a lot of the same clips from earlier.

Heath Slater replaced RVD (injured) in the match with Rollins. Ambrose came out for a great series of distractions, allowing Slater to get a rollup pin. Dean is so perfect for this role and it works like a charm.

Stephanie and Brie had their contract signing with Stephanie beating up both Bellas. We need the big names back, if nothing else so we don’t have to put up with this closing the shows anymore.

The show was far longer than interesting. There’s about a two hour stretch in there that drags on for so long because everything is so quick and dull that it’s hard to care about it one way or another. Summerslam really needs to get here so we can have something new to watch though. It’s really not working right now and a lot of that is due to the focus on Brie vs. Stephanie. I’m still waiting on an explanation for how this match is historic, but it might be because it’s the least interesting match to close back to back Raws in years.

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This is a very dull time for WWE as so much of the Summerslam build is already done and there are still four weeks to go before the show. They’re already running out of things to put on the shows so you can expect a lot of filler instead of interesting ideas. Also you can see the Network plugs coming from here. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Orton attacking Reigns last week.

Here’s the Authority in full force to open things up. HHH talks about how we can watch Summerslam in two weeks on the WWE Network for just $9.99. He lists off a few more matches and mentions the Network price three or four more times. As for tonight, there’s going to be a Beat the Clock Challenge between Rollins (vs. Van Dam) and Ambrose (vs. Del Rio) with the winner picking the stipulation for the match at Summerslam (“Available on the WWE Network for just $9.99!”).

Stephanie talks about signing the contract with Brie tonight and how that’s going to be on the Network for….well you know the idea by now. So does the crowd as they’re finishing HHH’s lines for him. Lawler is cracking jokes about it as well, even though HHH is clearly hammering it home to play up the heel heat.

Orton says that what he did last week was nothing compared to what he’s going to do to him at Summerslam. This brings out Reigns who says that he wants to fight tonight, but HHH has another idea. They’ll fight at Summerslam (“On the WWE Network for just $9.99!”) but tonight, it’s Reigns vs. Kane in a last man standing match.

Kane vs. Roman Reigns

Last man standing. Reigns hammers away to start as the announcers talk about the Network even more. They head outside with Reigns being hammered up against the barricade and then sent into the steps for a five count. Reigns is sent into the post a few more times as the announcers continue to hammer the $9.99 joke into the ground to the point where I’m laughing at it.

We take an early break and come back with Reigns reversing Kane into a chair wedged into the corner. Some charges into the corner have Kane in even more trouble and Roman hammers away with right hands. There’s the apron boot but Kane blocks a spear. A table is brought in and Kane counters a Superman Punch into a quick chokeslam to put Reigns through the wood for nine.

Kane is frustrated and sets up a chair in the middle of the ring. The tombstone is countered and Reigns hits a DDT onto the chair. Reigns hits the Superman Punch but charges into another chokeslam. Reigns slips out again and nails a bad spear to keep Kane down for the ten count at 15:16.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. I have no idea why but it happened. This idea of throwing gimmick matches onto the card is a really bad idea. It wasn’t a very good last man standing match either as there was no way Kane was going to win. Reigns beating Kane is a good thing, but not in an unnecessary gimmick match.

We get a LONG (as in about five minutes) video on Brock vs. Cena, with sitdown promos from both guys, talking about how awesome they are and saying this is going to be the fight of their lives, even though Brock knows he’s going to win. This is a really solid video with clips of the Extreme Rules match and the Streak being broken. We even get stills from some UFC fights. Brock says if he had stayed in the WWE, Cena would be sitting at home eating Fruity Pebbles instead of getting paid to eat them on TV. Lesnar promises to leave Cena in a pool of his own blood.

Network plug.

Here’s Damien Sandow as an Oklahoma Sooner football player. He rips on the Texas Longhorns before his opponent is announced as a former Longhorn.

Mark Henry vs. Damien Sandow

World’s Strongest Slam, Henry walks around, pin in 40 seconds. Not quite the battle to save Christmas.

Adam Rose is in the back and looks at the Oculus Mirror. He says it shows your nightmare, so we see him in a suit as a businessman. Rose and the Rosebuds leave after this STUPID segment.

Beat the Clock: Dean Ambrose vs. Alberto Del Rio

Jerry: “I hope this match goes 10:39.” Cole: “Why?” Jerry: “Then it would be 9.99!” Del Rio takes over with some kicks including a dropkick to the back of the head for two. Some choking in the corner has Dean in trouble but he comes back with some right hands of his own. They head outside with Del Rio sending Ambrose hard into the barricade. Back in and Del Rio hammers away on the bad arm and sends it into the post.

An armbar goes nowhere and Del Rio jumps into a boot. Dean makes his comeback but gets caught by the low superkick for two. Alberto sends him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Deal fighting out of another armbar but getting taken right back down. Del Rio accidentally kicks the post instead of Dean’s shoulder and gets caught in a DDT.

Del Rio counters the Dirty Deeds and hits a VERY low reverse superplex for two. The Rebound Clothesline gets two on Alberto but he counters Dirty Deeds into a Codebreaker on the arm. The armbreaker over the ropes has the arm in even more trouble but Dean nails Dirty Deeds for the pin at 15:42.

Rating: D+. WAY too long here as they could have done this in about half the time. The arm stuff is fine but it gets annoying to see it week after week after week. Del Rio being down in the midcard is a good thing for him as he just does not fit in the main event. Ambrose vs. Rollins should rock, as long as they keep the energy up.

Long recap of Stephanie and Brie last week.

Rusev vs. Sin Cara

This match took place during the break on the WWE App with Rusev winning a squash in about 45 seconds via the Accolade. Uh….sweet?

Post match we get pictures of Obama holding a dog and Putin holding what looks like a cheetah. Lana sings Happy Birthday to Obama in Russian until Colter and Swagger interrupt. Colter goes on a rant about how everyone is sick of Lana’s Russian ramblings and shows some photos of American men and women Swagger is fighting for. He cranks it up by showing stills of American soldiers and the USA chant begins. Rusev and Lana pretend to back off but Rusev nails Swagger with the Russian flag. Colter is left alone but Lana calls Rusev off.

The big Network announcement: it’s going international on August 12 and to England on October 1.

Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler

Miz is on commentary drinking tea because he has a hoarse voice. Cesaro throws Ziggler around with ease but has a suplex reversed into the Zig Zag for the pin at 2:58. Nothing match but Cesaro gets to job AGAIN.

Post match Miz gets in the ring but runs from a superkick.

After a clip of Paige knocking AJ off the stage last week, Paige says she admires AJ and that she can’t wait for their match at Summerslam.

Stardust/Goldust vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel

Goldust hammers on Ryback to start but gets taken into the wrong corner for some quick double teaming. A suplex gets two on Goldust and it’s off to Axel, who quickly allows Goldust to roll over for the tag to Stardust. Everything breaks down and Dark Matter (Downward Spiral) to Axel gets the pin at 2:50.

Kane comes in to see the Authority and takes off his mask, hands it to Stephanie, and leaves.

Chris Jericho vs. Luke Harper

If Jericho wins, Harper is barred from ringside at Summerslam. Jericho gets taken down into the corner but comes back with chops, only to get run over with a forearm. Off to the Gator Roll but Jericho fights up again with chops. An enziguri gets two on Luke but he comes back with a Michinoku Driver for the same.

There’s a big sitout powerbomb for the same and Harper calmly smiles. Back up and Jericho grabs the Walls but Bray comes out for a distraction. Harper is down so Jericho has to hit the Codebreaker on Harper. The distraction….doesn’t work as a Codebreaker puts Harper on the floor, only to have Bray come in for the DQ at 5:20.

Rating: C. This was fine and sets up Jericho vs. Bray one on one at Summerslam, but I really would have liked to see Harper vs. Jericho get about fifteen minutes instead of five. The ending was kind of surprising, but at least Bray’s distraction wasn’t the cause of a pin. It seems like they’re almost mocking that now, so maybe its time is almost over.

Sister Abigail lays out Jericho post match.

AJ Lee returns tomorrow night on Main Event. In other words, she missed Raw and has been gone for three days?

Diego vs. Fandango

Because THIS needed a trilogy. This time, Fandango has Hornswoggle as his new dance partner. Diego easily takes Fandango down but gets distracted by Hornswoggle. It backfires on the dancer though and another Backstabber gets the pin on Fandango at 48 seconds.

Hornswoggle joins Diego, Torito, and the girls but Fandango gets annoyed. That goes nowhere and Fandango is dispatched again, because this story needed to be done three times.

Orton looks at a video of his attack on Reigns last week and says that he’s going to do even worse at Summerslam.

Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth

Now how did I know it would be R-Truth again? Truth shoves him around to start but misses the ax kick. Dallas rolls him up with a handful of tights for the pin at 1:05.

JBL now has a $9.99 sign.

Bray comes up on screen and asks why the man does what he does. Why does the man say what he says and why don’t the sheep run from the hungry wolf? At Summerslam, he enters battle without his brothers. He won’t be alone though because her hand guides him and the world leaves him behind. How can Jericho save what is already dead? What is Bray? He’s the nightmare at the end of Jericho’s dreams and he stands beyond time. Time to sing.

The announcers plug Brock vs. Cena from Extreme Rules airing immediately after Raw on the Network.

More from the Lesnar and Cena interviews in another solid video. This is a nice way to cover Brock and Cena not being there tonight. This time Brock says he’s back to be WWE Champion and is coming off the biggest win of his career. Why shouldn’t he have been able to beat Undertaker? The Undertaker wasn’t a god and Brock Lesnar is a beast. Now why can’t he beat Cena? John talks about how he knows what kind of a beating he’s in for but he knows what it takes to beat Brock. If Lesnar wants some, come get some. We get some of the same clips from the first video as well.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Rob Van Dam vs. Seth Rollins

I forgot this was happening. Seth has to beat 15:42. JBL actually picks Van Dam to win here because Seth is going to be thinking about the clock. Actually scratch this as the Authority has a replacement for Van Dam.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Heath Slater vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins allows Slater to leave but Heath fires off some right hands. Ambrose comes out for a distraction, allowing Slater to get a VERY close two off a running neckbreaker. Now Dean takes the briefcase and starts looking through it, even ripping up Seth’s contract. This distraction lets Slater hit a side kick for an even closer two. Dean starts drinking a fan’s soda and pours it into the briefcase. He follows it up with popcorn and JBL’s hat as Rollins keeps shouting at him. Dean gets up on the table, and you know that’s enough for Slater to get a rollup pin at 4:56.

Rating: D+. I’m skeptical to rate this as a wrestling match but it was really solid as an angle. Dean playing the mind games before the showdown is nothing but gold and the showdown is going to be awesome. The stipulations could make or break the match though as they need to have an all out brawl.

One more Network ad, this time for the Cena vs. Lesnar match from 2012 airing after the show.

Time for the main event segment: Brie and Stephanie’s contract signing. HHH comes out to back up his wife and Brie of course has Nikki. HHH says that he’s the COO and would usually be in charge of this, but since he has a conflict of interest, it’s Michael Cole in charge. The bosses kiss a bit so Brie says let’s get to it. Stephanie finally brings up Daniel Bryan, who is still recovering.

Brie shows us Stephanie being arrested two weeks ago to drag this out even more. She makes some bizarre references to Stephanie being with some woman during her time in jail before saying she’ll humiliate Stephanie in front of the universe at Summerslam. This is going to be for Daniel Bryan, Vickie Guerrero, the Rhodes Family, and every other person on the roster that Stephanie has tortured. A quick Punk chant starts up as Brie talks about karma coming around onto Stephanie.

Now it’s Stephanie’s turn as she calls Brie a wannabe reality star who stole the spotlight from her sister and abandoned her husband. Stephanie is already embarrassed to be in the same ring as Brie and isn’t going to let her make history at Summerslam. She slaps Nikki and shoves the table into Brie’s stomach, sending her into the corner. A Pedigree from Stephanie lays out Nikki but Brie slaps HHH. Stephanie nails Brie and lays her out with a Pedigree as well. The Authority kisses some more to end the show.

Time for the main event segment: Brie and Stephanie’s contract signing. HHH comes out to back up his wife and Brie of course has Nikki. HHH says that he’s the COO and would usually be in charge of this, but since he has a conflict of interest, it’s Michael Cole in charge. The bosses kiss a bit so Brie says let’s get to it. Stephanie finally brings up Daniel Bryan, who is still recovering.

Brie shows us Stephanie being arrested two weeks ago to drag this out even more. She makes some bizarre references to Stephanie being with some woman during her time in jail before saying she’ll humiliate Stephanie in front of the universe at Summerslam. This is going to be for Daniel Bryan, Vickie Guerrero, the Rhodes Family, and every other person on the roster that Stephanie has tortured. A quick Punk chant starts up as Brie talks about karma coming around onto Stephanie.

Now it’s Stephanie’s turn as she calls Brie a wannabe reality star who stole the spotlight from her sister and abandoned her husband. Stephanie is already embarrassed to be in the same ring as Brie and isn’t going to let her make history at Summerslam. She slaps Nikki and shoves the table into Brie’s stomach, sending her into the corner. A Pedigree from Stephanie lays out Nikki but Brie slaps HHH. Stephanie nails Brie and lays her out with a Pedigree as well. The Authority kisses some more to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show felt REALLY long and had far too much stuff that ate up a lot of time. When you have your third meetings between Fandango and Diego and then Bo Dallas and R-Truth, you can tell they’re just filling in time. It’s also proof that Cena really picks up a show as there was almost no energy to so much of this stuff. Is Kane unmasking for like the third time supposed to get my attention? That’s the best they’ve got?

Of course I have to mention all the $9.99 stuff. I get what they were going for with the evil boss plugging stuff like a businessman would, but later on when the announcers were doing it seemingly of their own free will, it takes away the evil and comes off like a lame commercial. This is WWE in a nutshell though: if something doesn’t work, keep doing it until someone buys it out of pity.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Kane – Kane couldn’t answer the ten count
Mark Henry b. Damien Sandow – World’s Strongest Slam
Dean Ambrose b. Alberto Del Rio – Dirty Deeds
Rusev b. Sin Cara – Accolade
Dolph Ziggler b. Cesaro – Zig Zag
Goldust/Stardust b. Curtis Axel/Ryback – Dark Matter to Axel
Diego b. Fernando – Backstabber
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Rollup with a handful of tights
Heath Slater b. Seth Rollins – Rollup

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