Monday Night Raw
Date: October 27, 2014
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

We’re past the Cell and the main story is Bray Wyatt interfering in the main event and costing Ambrose what seemed to be a sure win. This would seem to set up Ambrose vs. Wyatt, which isn’t exactly Undertaker vs. Kane but at least it’s something new. We’re on the way to Survivor Series now and have four solid weeks to get there. Let’s get to it.

We open with a package of stills from Rollins vs. Ambrose, including what looked like a ghost popping up in the middle of the ring when Wyatt appeared. Cena vs. Orton gets a package of its own.

The Authority (bosses and Kane) are in the ring to open the show. Stephanie is her smug self and brags about having two Cell matches last night. HHH says Orton fought hard in a great match but plays up Rollins as the much bigger deal. This brings out a limping Rollins (flanked by the Stooges) to brag about winning the feud and being done with Ambrose once and for all. He sets down the briefcase and says he’ll be seeing Cena later tonight.

The music plays and Rollins poses but here’s a ticked off Orton to interrupt. Randy rips into Rollins and the Authority for bringing up Cena beating him twice in ten minutes. He blames Rollins and the Curb Stomp for the loss last week. Now he’s back in anger management and it’s time to deal with Rollins so the fight is on. HHH and Kane break it up with the boss saying we’re not doing this tonight. He wants Orton to take the night off and go get on his bus. They can deal with this later but tonight isn’t the right time. HHH mentions the Cell one more time and that earns Rollins an RKO. Orton leaves and Seth staggers out.

Tag Team Titles: Big Show/Mark Henry vs. Stardust/Goldust

Earlier today Show was upset that Henry came down to the ring last night but Henry says he was just there to celebrate. Show isn’t sure but Henry suggests they win the Tag Team Titles. Show shoves Goldust around to start ebfore it’s off to Henry for a Vader clothesline to keep control. Stardust comes in and tries some shots of his own, only to be dragged into the corner for a tag off to Big Show.

We get the SHH chops before it’s back to Henry for a Sexual Chocolate chant. Henry actually gets into it this time and does a hip swivel in the corner. Show makes a blind tag and Henry isn’t cool with it as we take a break. Back with Show fighting out of a Goldust headlock and putting on a kind of Haas of Pain until Stardust makes the save. Off to Henry again with Stardust hammering him right back down.

Stardust cranks on a front facelock before hitting a springboard missile dropkick, only to send Henry into the corner for another tag to Show. Big Show cleans house and spears Stardust down before the KO Punch knocks him silly. Henry comes in and World’s Strongest Slams Show before putting Stardust on top to retain at 11:10.

Rating: D+. This was another obvious ending but Henry was floundering after losing to Rusev. I’m not looking forward to the battle of the fat guys but they’ve surprised me with the Rusev matches. It’s the logical turn after things have happened but the blowoff match needs to not bomb.

Henry gives him two more Slams and a splash after the match.

Post break Henry says that’s what he does.

Video on Roman Reigns.

Reigns is live via satellite and says he’d love to be in San Antonio tonight. The Cell match last night was carnage and he knew Dean would bring the fight. Rollins is a coward though and Reigns is coming for him.

AJ Lee vs. Alicia Fox

Non-title. Paige is on commentary because the feud just won’t die. Fox nails AJ to start and dropkicks her out to the floor. Back in and the northern lights suplex gets two and an elbow to the jaw puts AJ down. We hit the chinlock for a bit before AJ counters a slam with a spinning DDT. Fox comes right back with a backbreaker for two, prompting Paige to scream at Fox. AJ uses the distraction for the rollup pin at 3:37.

Rating: D+. This could have been worse but anything that gets us away from Paige vs. AJ is a good thing. I could go with Paige trying to find her new best friend, as long as we don’t get back to AJ vs. Paige in like a month. Let there be a division instead of just two girls fighting each other over and over.

Paige apologizes post match but destroys Fox with a kick to the chest and a catapult into the barricade.

Here’s Cena as the new #1 contender. He talks about the Spurs raising a championship banner tomorrow night before moving on to what happened last night. It may not have been the final chapter of his rivalry with Orton, but it was one of the biggest. The win brings Cena up to face Brock Lesnar, who is going to come back to WWE as a loser. From now on, everything Cena does is a statement to Lesnar, starting with beating Orton last night and moving on to Rollins tonight.

Tonight the new poster boy gets a wakeup call but here’s Stephanie to interrupt. She mentions the traditional Survivor Series match in a few weeks but for tonight, she has a business proposition. Cena has to play up to the crowd all the time and he has to be getting tired of it. John cuts her off and says he’s listening to the people but Stephanie says the people don’t matter.

They keep booing Cena, of course causing a Cena chant. That doesn’t count because all they want to see is violence and Cena on the mat and he never stops fighting. Why not come join the Authority where he can have the support he needs? Lesnar has beaten him twice and the people have cheered for Cena’s pain, but the Authority could offer some insurance. She ups the offer a bit: if Cena wins tonight, he can captain the Authority’s team at Survivor Series.

Cena says the only thing he deserves is a chance to come to the ring every night and work hard. The fans show up because they’re all a part of this no matter who they cheer for. Stephanie plays up the legacy card but Cena goes with the standard “I don’t sell out” promo, but here’s HHH to cut off his exit. HHH talks about being here for twenty years and how Cena is getting more and more banged up.

One day Cena is going to be the old man hobbling out here for one more hurrah and that isn’t going to work for him. Cena can try to fight the future but the Authority is going to make an example of him at the Survivor Series. At the end of the day, the Authority wins and there’s nothing Cena can do to stop it, so go try to find some men to join his team.

Usos vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

Mizdow is already mimicking Miz even on the apron. Jimmy blocks some hiptoss attempts and gets two off a Bubba Bomb. Miz comes back with a clothesline and points to Mizdow but chokes Jimmy instead of tagging. A clothesline puts Miz on the floor and Mizdow runs outside to lay next to him. The double Uso dive takes the heels down and we go to a break. Back with Miz driving Jey into the apron for two.

We hit the chinlock on Jey before it’s back to Mizdown for a snap suplex. He hooks a chinlock of his own before the short DDT gets two. Mizdow tries the running clothesline in the corner but Jey grabs the arm and nails him in the jaw. Jimmy gets the hot tag and cross bodies Miz for two. Everything breaks down and the Usos bust out some twin magic so Jey can roll up Miz for the pin at 10:48.

Rating: C-. See, this is how you bring back an old idea. Yeah the Usos have done this before, but they haven’t used it in a very long time so it feels fresh again. This would be different than just doing the same thing week after week and wondering why it gets a weaker and weaker reaction every week.

Cena and Ziggler shake hands in the back so maybe John has his first recruit.

Here’s Hulk Hogan to reenforce his stance on the anti-cancer side of things. The cancer survivors get in the ring with him and that’s about it.

Bo Dallas comes out for an open challenge.

Bo Dallas vs. Ryback

Ryback appears to be a face again and the fans are WAY behind him. A release gorilla press and spinebuster set up the Meat Hook and Shell Shock for the pin at 1:11. I can totally dig Ryback as the machine again.

We recap the opening segment.

Cesaro vs. Dean Ambrose

Before the match, Ambrose gets on the announcers’ table and says he loved what he went through last night. He beat Seth within an inch of his life but found Bray Wyatt waiting on him. The law of the jungle are you don’t mess with someone with sharper claws than you have and you don’t screw with Dean Ambrose. Dean charges into the ring and hammers on Cesaro with the mic. They go up the ramp with Dean destroying Cesaro so no bell and no match.

Ambrose gets in the ring and calls out Bray Wyatt for the beating he deserves. Bray pops up on screen and says that he can’t help but see the deranged affliction on Dean’s face. They’re both victims of a system that makes people cringe at the sight of people like them. But what happens now? They’re not brothers or friends but they’re both a bit odd and that’s a warning to Ambrose.

Nikki Bella vs. Naomi

Naomi quickly takes her down to start but gets caught in an Alabama Slam out of the corner. They head outside for a few seconds so Nikki can ram her into the apron before throwing on a chinlock back inside. Naomi makes her comeback and sends Nikki to the floor but Brie reluctantly cheats to give her sister the advantage, setting up the Rack Attack for the pin at 4:20.

Rating: D. So this whole thing is going to wind up being about either a Bellas reunion or another match at Survivor Series? They can only go so far with Brie being a servant for four weeks, but I’m sure it’s going to be DEVASTATING and a test of her inner character or whatever sounds good for a plot on Total Divas.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kane

Non-title. Ziggler hammers away to start and gets run over by a clothesline for his efforts. Kane drapes him ribs first over the top rope and we’re already in the chinlock. Ziggler fights up and dropkicks Kane out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Ziggler planting Kane with a DDT but getting nailed by a hard right hand for two.

We’re back to the chinlock for a bit before Ziggler fights up and starts his comeback. The big elbow drop gets two but Dolph charges into the side slam for two. Back up and Kane fights out of the DDT, only to eat a superkick. The Zig Zag is countered and a big boot gets two for Kane. He loads up the chokeslam but gets countered into a sunset flip for the pin at 13:25.

Rating: C. Not bad here as it’s a good power guy vs. a good speed guy. Kane is a shell of his former self but he can still do his basic power stuff well enough when you give him a pinball like Ziggler to bounce all over the place. Nice match though and I like seeing a champion get a win. This is the kind of thing Kane should be doing.

Rollins comes out for the beatdown until Cena makes the save.

John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Seth went to the back for no apparent reason. Before the match, we have to simulate Lesnar vs. Cena in WWE2K15. After that goes nowhere, we’re ready to go with Rollins still sporting heavily taped ribs. Cena quickly takes him down to start and messes with the bad ribs. The sequence works so well that they do it again before Cena nails a single shot to the ribs to put Rollins on the floor.

This time Cena goes after him and sends him into the barricade before hammering away even more. Seth drives him ribs first into the apron to take over. They head back inside where Mercury gets in a cheap shot before Cena is thrown right back outside. After the Stooges get in their cheap shots, Seth takes Cena back inside and actually stays in for awhile this time. Rollins gets two off a Blockbuster and we take a break.

Back with the fight on the floor and Cena getting all fired up, only to be thrown into the steps. Seth takes him inside again for a chinlock but Cena fights back with his usual. That doesn’t last long either though as Cena is sidestepped to the floor. Rollins’ dive mostly hits but he collisdes with the announcers’ table to bang up the ribs again. Cena breaks up a superplex attempt and gets two off a high cross body, only to get DDT’ed down for the same.

We head outside for about the ninth time so far for some more shots to Cena’s head. Back in and Rollins gets two off the top rope knee to the head before it’s back to the chinlock. Cena rolls out but can’t put on the STF. Instead it’s a dropkick to John’s face but Rollins can’t follow up. Mercury gets in another shot on the floor and Cena has to dive back in to beat the count.

Cena fights back again and throws Rollins onto the Stooges, only to get nailed in the face again for another two count. There’s a tornado DDT for two on Rollins but he flips out of the AA. An enziguri misses Cena but Seth comes back with the standing Sliced Bread #2 for another near fall. Cena’s superplex is countered and Seth charges across the ring for a buckle bomb and an even closer two. The Curb Stomp is countered into the STF but Kane comes in for the DQ at 22:15.

Rating: B. Really solid effort here from both guys but you might as well have advertised it as a DQ in the first place. Rollins continues to be protected and that’s a good thing for his future. The match wasn’t a classic but it did everything it needed to and had the only ending they could go with.

Ziggler comes out for the save and the entire locker room joins him to clean house. Cena AA’s Slater and Dallas before staring down the Authority to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Not the best show in the world but they’ve got some interesting stuff coming. Cena recruiting help in the next few weeks should give us some intriguing developments, even though Orton as the last guy is fairly clear. The wrestling tonight wasn’t bad but more importantly they made some necessary changes to freshen things up a bit. It’s not a good show but it gives me hope and the fresh start they’ve needed for a long time now.

Results

Stardust/Goldust b. Big Show/Mark Henry – Stardust pinned Big Show after a World’s Strongest Slam from Henry

AJ Lee b. Alicia Fox – Rollup

Usos b. Miz/Damien Mizdown – Small package to Miz

Ryback b. Bo Dallas – Shell Shock

Nikki Bella b. Naomi – Rack Attack

Dolph Ziggler b. Kane – Sunset flip

John Cena b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Kane interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 20, 2014
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for the Cell and we have our double main event all set with Rollins vs. Ambrose in what should be the main event and the first ever rematch inside the Cell with Orton vs. Cena. Other than that there’s some well built but not very interesting stuff, but I’m not sure how well it’s going to hold up on Sunday. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s events setting up the pay per view.

The Cell is lowered to open the show and here’s the Authority minus Stephanie. With the Cell hanging above the ring, HHH welcomes us to the show and promises us a special episode tonight. For our main event, we’re seeing Kane/Orton/Rollins vs. Ambrose/Cena in a handicap street fight. Well at least there’s a twist now. HHH goes into the traditional speech about how the Cell changes you, even though the violence being toned down makes those lines sound so stupid.

Rollins takes the mic and talks about how much he likes the Mr. Money in the Bank moniker, but a YOU SOLD OUT chant cuts him off. He emphasizes that he’ll be beating Ambrose in the main event on Sunday, but Orton says the real main event will have people involved longer than a cup of coffee.

Orton promises to end the rivalry once and for all (didn’t he already do that?), but HHH cuts him off as well, saying that it’s a double main event. We’re going to one up the Orton vs. Cena match because the winner is getting a World Title shot at some point in the future. Orton gets some cheap heat on the Kansas City Royals and we get Kane’s corner pyro to end the speeches.

We recap Mizdown imitating Sheamus on Main Event and getting a Brogue Kick for his efforts.

Sheamus/Usos vs. Miz/Goldust/Stardust

Why do I bother watching Smackdown again? Miz vs. Sheamus for the title is official for Sunday. Miz swaps out for Mizdow to start so at least it’s something different.

Sheamus/Usos vs. Damien Mizdow/Goldust/Stardust

Miz jumps in on commentary as the Usos start in on Stardust. Jimmy nails a hard kick to the face for two and it’s already off to Goldust. The heels take over on Jimmy in the corner and get him down to the mat with Stardust kicking him to the floor. We take a break and come back with Goldust slamming Jimmy down for two. Mizdow comes in and tries the running corner clothesline but runs into a boot to the face.

Stardust still won’t let the hot tag and we look at Miz several times. Jimmy scores with a kick to the head and the double tag brings in Sheamus and Mizdow. The champ cleans house but Mizdow snaps his throat across the top to break up the ten forearms. Sheamus powerslams Mizdow but walks into the same from Goldust as everything breaks down. The Usos dive on Goldust, only to have Stardust dive on all of them. Sheamus throws Mizdow onto the pile and Brogue Kicks Stardust, allowing Mizdow to roll him up for the pin (with trunks) at 9:40. Miz: “I WON!”

Rating: D+. Well at least it was something different. The match wasn’t any good though and it’s mainly because we’ve seen this same idea so many times. It drives me crazy that the only way to get to a title match is the same combination over and over again in multi-man matches. Have the Usos or the Dusts fight other teams and do a run-in or something. There are so many ways to get to a match but it’s just the same stuff over and over again. It’s rather tiring. Also: you couldn’t have an Uso take this pin? It just had to be the US Champion?

Orton comes in and thanks HHH for the chance to face Lesnar so he can headline Wrestlemania again. HHH likes the idea but says Seth came up with making Orton vs. Cena for a title shot. Orton is confused but says he’ll go thank Rollins.

Long Wyatt video talking about the Family being free and then Bray saying he’ll never be free but She told him he’ll never be alone. It’s coming.

AJ Lee vs. Alicia Fox

Non-title but AJ is defending against Paige on Sunday. Again. That will be their fifth singles match since the day after Wrestlemania. To put this in context, Lita and Trish fought each other twelve times in over six years. Fox runs her over to start but walks into a sunset flip for two. A big boot puts AJ down for two and the perfect northern lights suplex gets the same.

Fox plants her with a nice tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two more but she spends too much time posing, allowing AJ to start her comeback. AJ is now the One Girl Revolution because even she has to have a slogan. Alicia gets knocked to the floor….and rammed into the barricade by Paige. The champ yells at Paige, allowing Fox to roll her up for the pin at 4:16, because all titles other than the WWE Title mean absolutely nothing.

Rating: D. This match just made me mad. Let’s see: another champion loses via rollup, we’re setting up the fifth match between Paige and AJ in six months, Paige’s “mind games” stopped being interesting months ago, and Alicia’s win probably won’t take her anywhere. What good came from this match?

Orton comes in to see Rollins and Seth says don’t worry about what he did, but Randy is still confused. Apparently it was just being a team player, but Orton tells him to mind his ownbusiness. Rollins talks about how Orton can beat Cena, win the title and then the future just takes care of itself. Did I mention he’s holding the briefcase?

Here’s Orton to the ring for a chat. He talks about being in the Cell (which has been hanging over the ring all night for a nice visual) with Cena before and how they’ve been rivals for twelve years now. Cena was the punk kid from Boston but Orton was third generation wrestling royalty. The fans cheer for Orton so he goes after the Royals again for an easy save. I know people are going to say it’s cheap heat (even I did earlier), but that was a smart move as the fans are always going to boo someone going after their hometown team and it got them off the Orton train for a bit.

Orton talks about the great rivals of the years, such as Piper vs. Hogan, Hart vs. Michaels, Rock vs. Austin and now Orton vs. Cena. He beats John at the Rumble earlier this year and now he’s going to do it again. Orton has never cared about hustle, loyalty and respect and he’ll never fight for what is good.

This brings out Cena to tell Orton to shut up and call Orton a gifted moron. He rips on Orton for talking about the old times and sucks up to Kansas City (again, smart) as we start a baseball discussion. Being in the World Series and winning are two different things, just like Orton being in the match on Sunday. Cena wants to fight the Beast and he’ll see him on Orton’s face this Sunday.

Cue Heyman to call this rewritten history laughable. The class of 2002 featured Randy Orton, John Cena, and the Next Big Thing Brock Lesnar. Brock won the title from the Rock at Summerslam 2002 and is still champion in 2014. Heyman looks up at the Cell and says these two will have the chance to define their legacies (what does that even mean anymore?), but his client has no equal.

The winner of the match on Sunday is the ultimate loser, because he has to face a beast. Heyman has always respected Orton and he may want the title back, but he wants no part of Lesnar. Cena on the other hand wants both the title and the Beast, which makes him a crazy man. John loads Heyman up for the AA but puts him down and takes the RKO. Heyman is pleased but takes the RKO as well to a mixed reaction.

We recap Rusev vs. Big Show from last week, resulting in Henry and Big Show surrounding the Russian for the KO Punch.

Rusev vs. Big E.

Remember when this was a big deal? They do the power lockup to start until Rusev takes him into the corner for some kicks to the ribs. E. comes back with the Vader body attack to send Rusev to the floor, followed by the barricade. Back in and Rusev puts on a front facelock but Big E. powers up. We get an awkward looking sequence where Big E. didn’t seem to be in the right place, capped off by a spinwheel kick to send us to a commercial. Back with E. charging into the kick to the face and the Accolade for the submission at 7:49. The part after the break was about 30 seconds long.

Rating: D. Total squash here to make me sad because I like Big E. He’s the latest victim of the writers and Vince playing with a toy for a few months and then throwing him away for the latest thing. That being said, he can do a good job of making guys like Rusev look good. Nothing to see here other than Lana of course.

Lana calls Big Show a circus freak and loads up the Russian flag but it doesn’t come down. Show pops up on screen and the American flag comes down instead. Rusev goes to pull it down but a “fan” wearing military gear comes in and gets kicked in the face.

Post break Big Show is in the ring with the flag still hanging and an angry look on his face. He finally says you never disrespect an American soldier. Rusev has his attention now because Big Show is an American giant and on Sunday, his fifteen minutes are up. He doesn’t want to wait for Sunday though so Rusev can come out here right now. The Russians don’t come so Show goes to find them. Good promo here that didn’t get overly hammy.

Show goes to the back and asks a backstage worker where Rusev’s room is. Apparently it’s the door marked Rusev so Show kicks it in and finds a suit jacket and bags. Nothing to see here, literally.

Ambrose is eating popcorn and watching a movie when Cena comes in. John wants to know what’s going on. “Just watching See No Evil 2 starring Kane.” They’re going to be a team tonight even though they don’t like each other. Ambrose compares it to Batman and Superman because Cena has a great American jaw. Now Dean may be undefeated in contract on a pole matches, but handicap street fights are his specialty. He’s going to hit everything he can and take down as many as he can. Cena is cool with that but thinks Ambrose is more Joker than Batman. Dean: “Why so serious?”

Stephanie has won some award about Dwight Eisenhower.

Brie Bella vs. Summer Rae

We’re getting serious here: pale pink vs. hot pink. Brie sends her into the corner to start as Nikki is watching in the back. Summer gets two off a clothesline and we hit the chinlock. Bella finally breaks it up with an armdrag after wasting a minute of our time. We get the basic face comeback and BRIE MODE! Summer avoids a middle rope dropkick, gets caught in a second attempt and the Bella Buster is good for the pin at 3:42, meaning we get to hear the most obnoxious song opening in years.

Rating: F. A minute long chinlock in a four minute match. The Divas are just a disaster at this point with Paige vs. AJ having a ridiculously overhyped feud (it started good and now it’s just the same stuff for months on end) and Brie Bella as the only thing resembling a face in the division. How bad can this actu…..I’m not finishing that question because it can somehow get worse.

Here’s Ambrose with a big bag over his shoulders. He sets a chair in the ring and looks up at the Cell, saying he’s been dreaming about getting his hands on Rollins. This Sunday he gets the half hair dyed Power Rangers suit wearing sellout inside the Cell. Dean goes to the bag and pulls out….a Seth Rollins mannequin. He sits it in the chair and says that Rollins never liked getting his hands dirty, so the first thing he’ll do in the Cell is rip off Seth’s arms. That’s exactly what he does to the mannequin before screwing it over just like Seth did to him, although Dean uses a screwdriver.

Then he hammers (using a hammer as you should be getting the idea by now) the point home and talks about what he saw (hand saw in this case) in a dream last night: him cutting Seth’s testicles off inside the Cell. “Oh wait. You already sold those to the Authority.” He tongs Seth’s crotch (“You don’t need to have kids anyway.”) and DDTs it for good measure.

This brings out Seth and the new Stooges for a rebuttal. Seth calls the dummy an opponent that Dean can connect with on an intellectual level. Dean can never beat Ambrose, but maybe he can have a comedy career opening for Gallagher. Dean says let’s give Seth a hand (which is exactly what he does) but Rollins stops to address the YOU SOLD OUT chants. He’s a midwestern guy just like them but that’s where the similarities end. None of the losers here will ever know what it’s like to be Seth Rollins. Yeah he sold out the Shield but so what.

Dean busts out a power drill and wants to fight right now. Seth seems interested….and here’s Mick Foley. He’s here to visit an old friend and congratulate both guys on their success. His kids raved about seeing the Shield in action and he had to see them raise the bar. Foley isn’t around much but he always watches Raw and Smackdown. He even subscribes to the WWE Network for an undisclosed monthly amount. Foley has pictured the match on Sunday and sees almost no way Ambrose can win.

Seth insults Foley’s Santa Claus beard but Foley says he said Ambrose doesn’t win in most ordinary scenarios. However, that Cell isn’t an ordinary scenario. Yeah he’s wearing a Santa Claus shirt and he has for 300 consecutive days now. It’s one of the few things that he hasn’t had ripped away from him and he still can hold it in his heart. The scars from the Cell are the ones inside you and he’s lost so much because of it. He invites Rollins to look at his missing tooth and the fans offer Foley their thanks.

Dean says no one gets him but Mick Foley might come close. Ambrose is ready for the Cell but he doesn’t think Rollins is quite there. Seth says both guys are out of their minds but winning has nothing to do with being crazy. He knows Ambrose better than everyone and Dean is out of his mind. He’ll win on Sunday because he’s just better than Dean could ever hope to be.

Foley quotes Nietzsche by saying what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. “With all due respect though, Frederick Nietzsche was never thrown off a Cell!” Foley doesn’t think either guy is ready for life after the Cell, but just like everyone here in Kansas City, they’re getting what they’ve wanted all their lives. Have a nice day. Rollins bails and gets hit with a mannequin. Good and long segment here with Ambrose being just different enough to keep things from getting boring.

Cesaro says he’ll be a better Intercontinental Champion than Ziggler could ever be. “Cesaro out.” I kind of like that one.

Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title here before the title match on Sunday. Cesaro easily takes him down to start and gets two off a shoulder. We hit the chinlock as Cole talks about these two fighting on Twitter. JBL: “Back in my day we fought over beer and chicks.” Ziggler comes back with a dropkick and a clothesline to put Cesaro on the floor. A big uppercut drops Dolph and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro countering a sunset flip into a gorilla press gutbuster for two. A middle rope ax handle and splash (from the middle of the ropes instead of the corner) get two more and we hit the chinlock. Dolph makes his comeback and counters a tiger bomb into a faceplant for two. Back up and Cesaro throws him into the air for Swiss Death and the pin at 9:28.

Rating: D+. Three matches, three champions get pinned. That would be Dolph’s fourth straight pinfall loss and I’d bet he wins on Sunday to make it all better because we’re just supposed to forget these losses. One thing I really liked here: Cole identified both guys for people who might be first time watchers. All he had to say was “Ziggler with the blond hair on your right, Cesaro on your left.” It took three seconds and might have cleared up some unsure viewers. I love little things like that.

Cesaro Neutralizes him post match for good measure.

The Authority is arguing in the back until HHH comes in to yell at them. Kane is officially the captain for the street fight so he takes over the yelling at his partners.

MizdowTV is the pre-show special this month. Remember when it was a wrestling match?

Hell in a Cell by the numbers:

20 feet high

5 tons

½ mile of steel

10/5/1997 – The first match

6 men in one match in 2000

6 victories by Undertaker and HHH

6 times Orton has been in the Cell

47:26 is the longest Cell match (HHH vs. HBK at Bad Blood 2003)

11 men who have won in the Cell

12 times Undertaker has been in the Cell

78,363 people who watched at Wrestlemania XXVIII

29 men who have entered

18 who have only done it once

2 matches this year

Same Wyatt video from earlier.

Dean Ambrose/John Cena vs. Authority

Handicap street fight. Cena has the serious black shorts on tonight. Huge brawl to start and we get the required “let’s follow the rules before realizing there are no rules” period. Dean stomps on Seth’s ribs and pulls at his hair before knocking Kane to the floor. They head outside and fight at the table with Cena cleaning house. Dean dives on the pile and makes things interesting with a chair. A few shots to the back put Seth down and it’s already table time. Everything breaks down on the floor and we take a break.

Back with Rollins putting Dean in a chinlock before Randy draped him across the top rope. It’s already back to Rollins as things settle down and get very unstreet fightish. Orton teases Dean by letting him crawl halfway across the ring before starting the Garvin Stomp. Dean fights back with right hands and a missile dropkick to put both guys down. There’s the hot tag to Cena and Kane takes the AA.

Here’s another table since the first one disappeared during the break. Rollins escapes the AA through the table and sends Cena head first into a chair in the corner. Kane and Orton send Dean into the steps as this is finally feeling like a street fight. Now the table is set up in the corner but Seth opts for a standing Sliced Bread #2 on Cena for two. Back to the floor with Cena going into the steps and then the post. Kane takes him back inside and sends him through the table in the corner.

The Cell comes down and Dean dives under just in time. The hot tag brings in Dean to dive on all three again. A dropkick puts Rollins into the cage and the Rebound Clothesline drops Orton. Dean finds a kendo stick to wear out Orton before throwing in another chair. A Cactus Jack elbow with the chair nails Orton again but Dean has to hit Kane with the chair. Orton and Rollins are sent to the floor and Randy looks frustrated. The suicide dive nails Rollins and everyone heads back inside for finishers, with Orton RKOing Dean for the pin at 18:28.

Rating: D+. The action was decCent but there was zero need for this to be a street fight. I kept waiting for the violence to kick in but it was almost all about the Cell being brought down at the end. This is a constant thing WWE does and it never stops getting on my nerves: if you want to have a handicap tag then have a handicap tag. I’m ok with Ambrose getting pinned as it wasn’t a fair match and at least it wasn’t by Kane. Side note: Cena has the worst attention span in wrestling history. He forgot Lesnar like a day after getting screwed out of the title win and now has forgotten Rollins after losing a single match.

Rollins Curb Stomps Orton for a surprise before posing on the Cell to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This show was all over the place. Above all, they had most of the midcard champions lose and not much new added for Sunday. The one thing they did add though can tie us back to the World Title scene, which hasn’t gotten a lot of attention yet. I like that they’re having the Orton vs. Cena match mean something because it’s almost impossible to care about it again.

The match will likely be ok but dear goodness I don’t want to see it. There’s a lot of stuff going on and thankfully they’re starting to tie it together. Rollins vs. Ambrose better main event the show though as Orton and Cena just do not need the spot. Bad show but at least it was trying.

Results

Damien Mizdow/Goldust/Stardust b. Usos/Sheamus – Rollup with a handful of trunks to Sheamus

Alicia Fox b. AJ Lee – Rollup

Rusev b. Big E. – Accolade

Brie Bella b. Summer Rae – Bella Buster

Cesaro b. Dolph Ziggler – Swiss Death

Authority b. John Cena/Dean Ambrose – RKO to Ambrose

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Coming off of last week, I really wasn’t looking forward to this week’s show. Things have been so boring in WWE lately and they almost have to turn around for the sake of my sanity. On the other hand, the theme this week seemed to be reality TV with Todd Chrisley of Chrisley Knows Best and some Real Housewife on the show. I’m sure this is going to go well. Let’s get to it.

We open with the now usual Ambrose and Cena showdown. This time it was Ambrose starting things off and wanting to deal with Cena so he could get to the showdown with Rollins. Cena came down and told Dean to shut up before he ran his mouth off and blew the biggest match of his life. Authority, tag match, it’s next.

The tag match was actually a three way this time with the unlikely duo fighting the Usos and the Dusts. This was a nice, long fifteen minute match that took its sweet time to get going but finally found its groove. The idea was the Authority kept waiting for the makeshift team to implode but Cena wound up AAing Goldust for the pin. This was the first in a long series of matches that got time and surprised me by how good it was. Cena and Ambrose vs. the Usos on their own for about seventeen minutes sounds good.

The Authority came out post match and made the Cena vs. Ambrose contract on a pole match for later tonight. I like this better, though I would have put it next week instead of next week. There’s no need to waste the fifteen minutes of PPV time to set the match up when you can do it here just fine. It also makes it easier to build a PPV when you have established main events.

Layla walked out on AJ Lee in a tag match but AJ pinned Alicia (partner of Paige) with a Shining Wizard. This was more of the same stuff we’ve seen for months from them.

Orton was granted his request of facing the loser of the contract match. They never said loser and called it “the other guy” but it’s a nice way making it sound better.

Orton beat Ziggler in another long match with a really good ending of Orton throwing Ziggler out of a powerbomb and into an RKO. That being said, there were other people that could have jobbed for Orton instead of Ziggler. I mean, it’s not like Kofi is doing anything is he? No it just had to be the Intercontinental Champion right? This is where WWE misusing its huge roster gets on my nerves.

Rollins came in after the match and gave Ziggler a Curb Stomp. The idea was that Rollins was trying to one up Orton, which carried into the next match where Rollins beat Jack Swagger in an easier match. Orton gave Jack an RKO for good measure. You can see Orton is about to turn face and it’s working really well.

Rusev and Big Show had their big showdown but Mark Henry ran in and caused a DQ. This is pretty clearly setting up another match at the PPV where Rusev gets his big win clean. Show knocked Rusev out cold after the match because he’s a sore loser.

The Chrisley Knows Best family was in the front row and their appearance was little more than a plug for the show. I have no interest in watching it but Chrisley came off as a nice guy who wanted to raise his kids well. I can’t make jokes about that.

Sheamus beat up Miz but lost by countout. See, now why couldn’t Orton have done that to Ziggler? Losing by countout is fine as Sheamus got carried away and distracted rather than getting pinned, even by a fluke.

The Total Divas met up with the housewife chick and Cameron had a stuck up chick off with her. Six Divas tag, you know the drill. Standard guest star appearance.

The new Wyatt video showed him alone and talking about Abigail as he kept saying it’s coming. Creepy stuff indeed but it worked.

Ambrose won the contract when Cena had to fight off the Authority in a dull match. This was what I expected it to be and didn’t really go anywhere new. Ambrose had to win it though.

Raw was FAR better this week as they cut out the stupid stuff and had a wrestling show. I know you can’t do this every week, but it’s nice to see something fresh for a change. When WWE cuts out all the goofiness and just lets the stories tell themselves, they make things way easier to sit through. It’s a good show this week and exactly what was needed after last week’s mess.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 13, 2014
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

We had cancer week last week, so this time it’s REALITY WEEK! Tonight there are two reality stars appearing on the show with Nene Leakes of the Real Housewives of Atlanta and Todd Chrisley of Chrisley Knows Best. Why I’m supposed to care about either of these people is beyond me, but you and I both know they can’t top HODA’S CRAZY DANCE! Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Authority making Ambrose vs. Cena for the right to face Rollins inside the Cell.

Here’s Ambrose to get things going. Dean says there’s nothing he’d like more than being locked inside the Cell with Seth Rollins. To be locked inside there with all that metal and steel so he can hurt Seth Rollins so bad that he wishes he never met Ambrose. But first there’s a certain fifteen time WWE Champion to deal with and here’s Cena to respond.

Cena says Ambrose needs to relax because the match is made and it’s in two weeks in Dallas. The people want to see it though because they know both guys have a chance to get their hands on Rollins. Cena offers a little advice: shut up until the pay per view and use the two weeks to get ready for the biggest match of his career when Cena breaks him.

Dean says thanks bit brother but he was born ready. Ambrose wants to drop Cena right now but John tells him to drop it because Ambrose is in way over his head. Dean drops the mic and cracks his knuckles but here’s the Authority. Short version: the match is on the Network in two weeks, it costs $9.99, they’re in a tag match against the Usos and the Dusts. The Authority even make a bet on if they’ll fight each other or not.

Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos vs. Dean Ambrose/John Cena

Dean and Jimmy get things going with Ambrose cranking on the arm. Off to Cena to stay on the armbar as the fans aren’t pleased with John. Jimmy slips over and tags in his brother who eats a clothesline for two. Cena and Ambrose keep working well together and don’t seem to have many issues with each other.

Jey slips out of the AA and grabs a top wristlock, only to get dropkicked back down. The slow arm work continues as the fans want Stardust. Ambrose finally gets in off the tag and hammers on Jimmy with right hands and the ReBound Clothesline to send him outside. Stardust gets in a shot of his own and we take a break.

Back with Stardust raking Jimmy’s back and tagging off to his corner for a double stomp in the corner. Stardust quickly comes back in and cranks on Jimmy’s arms. Jimmy finally sends the Dusts into each other but Goldust pulls Jey off the apron just in time. Ambrose goes after Goldust but Jey is able to tag in Cena.

John cleans house but Stardust flips out of the AA. Goldust comes in with a powerslam but Goldust eats a superkick. The double dive takes out the Dusts and Cena dives on all four of them. Ambrose won’t be left out and dives on all five for an even bigger crash. He throws Cena and Goldust inside where the makeshift team hits stereo finishers for the pin at 14:50.

Rating: C+. As usual with long tag matches like this, the match got way better after the break but the first part wasn’t any good. It was a bunch of boring arm work until we got to the second half where things sped up. Cena and Ambrose diving were nice visuals as it’s not something they bust out all that often. Good match but the first half is hard to sit through.

Post match the Authority comes out so HHH can pay off the bet ($1) to Stephanie. HHH thinks Ambrose and Cena really want to get at each other, so why not just do the contract match tonight? Cena and Ambrose stare each other down and the match is official.

We look at Big Show knocking Rusev out last month.

AJ Lee/Layla vs. Paige/Alicia Fox

AJ says she doesn’t like any of the Divas but she dislikes Layla the least. They can get along for one night at least. Alicia nails AJ with a quick tilt-a-whirl backbreaker before it’s off to Paige for some skipping. AJ chases her around but it’s quickly off to Alicia to miss a boot in the corner. Layla walks out on a tag attempt so AJ hits a quick Shining Wizard to pin Alicia at 1:51.

Layla gets beaten up for good measure.

We see Big Show ripping down the Russian flag.

Orton comes in to see the Authority and says he wants the loser of Ambrose and Cena. The bosses approve.

Rowan is free video.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton

Non-title and Cesaro is on commentary. Ziggler knocks him out to the floor to start and sends Orton face first into the steps. Back in and Orton gets two off a slam but walks into a dropkick. Orton knocks him back to the apron but gets pulled outside and sent into the barricade. They head back in again but Orton takes too long to gloat and gets dropkicked off the apron. Rollins comes out to the ramp with the briefcase for some reason and we take a break.

Back with Ziggler in a headlock and actually not fighting out immediately. A catapult sends Ziggler into the buckle for two and Orton puts him on the top rope for some headbutts. Dolph fights out of a superplex attempt but gets crotched before he can follow up. Now the superplex connects for two but Orton can barely follow up. Dolph makes his comeback with right hands and a running neckbreaker followed by an elbow drop for two.

Randy blocks a superkick and gets another two count off the snap powerslam. Ziggler counters the RKO (which was set up to a face pop), can’t hit the Fameasser and counters another RKO into the superkick for two. The Zig Zag is countered so Dolph tries the Fameasser, only to get countered into a powerbomb position. Orton throws him into the air and pulls him down into the RKO for the pin at 19:25. Rollins never was a factor.

Rating: B. That ending was awesome as Orton keeps coming up with creative ways to hit the RKO. It really seems like they’re setting up a face turn for him as he spent half the match playing to the crowd and may have been trying to outshine Rollins. It’s good stuff and I’ve always found Orton more interesting as a face than a heel. On the other hand, that’s Ziggler’s second clean loss in four days.

Post match Rollins gives Ziggler a Curb Stomp, likely setting up Ziggler’s third straight loss on Smackdown.

Seth Rollins vs. Jack Swagger

Rollins flips over Swagger’s shoulder to start and we’re already at a standoff. He misses a clothesline though and bails to the floor as we’ve barely had any contact yet. Swagger goes after Seth and gets his neck snapped across the top rope to finally get things going. Seth starts working on the arm and cranks on it a bit until Jack fights up with a clothesline. They head outside for another clothesline to Rollins but he gets in a shot of his own. Orton comes out to watch as Seth goes inside for a suicide dive to drop Swagger.

Back from a break with Rollins hitting a great looking enziguri for two and dropping some knees to the ribs. A kick to the back has Swagger in trouble but Rollins stops to yell at Orton. Seth cranks on the arm again but gets caught in a wheelbarrow suplex out of the corner for two. Swagger gets two more off the Vader Bomb before catching Rollins in the powerslam for another two count.

Jack takes out the knee and puts on the Patriot Lock, only to get rolled into the corner. Another Patriot Lock attempt is countered and the low superkick puts Jack down. The Curb Stomp is countered into another Patriot Lock but Seth makes the ropes. Seth is sent into the post but he counters a suplex into a rollup with a handful of tights for the pin at 15:05.

Rating: C+. Not a great match here but there’s only so much they can do with this concept. Rollins looked good and that’s all he was supposed to do so the match worked well enough. Swagger is the same guy he was before, which gets annoying at times but at least he has a fresh battery to absorb so many of his losses.

Orton RKOs Swagger post match and gets in Rollins face. They talk trash but no violence comes.

Ambrose says don’t expect him to be a nice guy tonight because that’s not his style. He’s bringing it to Cena and going off to get Rollins.

Big Show talks about how he’s going to fight for America tonight and how the weight of America is on his shoulders. That’s fine, because he has the biggest shoulders around.

Rusev vs. Big Show

Before the match Lana rips on America for celebrating Columbus Day and gets cheap heat off the Atlanta Braves. Rusev promises to crush Big Show and we’re ready to go. Show kicks him in the face to start and the USA chants begin. They head outside with Rusev being whipped into the barricade as it’s one sided so far. Some chops send Rusev back to the floor and Show steps on his head.

More chops (complete with the Braves’ Tomhawk Chop) start a USA chant until Rusev busts out a dropkick to stop Big Show cold. He nailed him right in the jaw too. Rusev stomps on the back and clotheslines Big Show out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Big Show slowly fighting out of a side choke but missing a middle rope elbow. Rusev puts on another choke but gets dropped by a slam. The KO Punch misses and Rusev kicks him in the ribs. The Accolade goes on and here’s Mark Henry. Mark gets knocked off the apron to break the hold but Rusev puts it right back on, drawing in Henry for the DQ at 14:09.

Rating: D+. This was slightly better than I was expecting and a minor miracle given how long it went. Big Show getting upset over this is going to be dull and it’s going to lead to Show vs. Henry yet again. Rusev hopefully gets to move on to someone other than a super heavyweight for awhile because there’s only so much more he can do against them.

Show seems to forgive Henry for what he did as the Russian flag comes down. Henry and Show surround the Russians so Rusev comes out swinging against Henry, only to get dropped by the KO Punch.

Sheamus hasn’t been feeling good since last week. The solution: two Brogue Kicks.

Ad for Chrisley Knows Best. The family is in the front row tonight and say how awesome it is to be here. They hype the new season and that’s about it. Simple and inoffensive plug for a show and nowhere near as bad as I was expecting.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

Non-title. Miz’s entrance now has the lights go out for a much better effect. Miz runs to start but decks Sheamus as they get back inside. Sheamus easily fights back and throws Miz onto Mizdow, who mimics everything Miz does, even throwing punches (albeit with the wrong arm). Miz cranks on a chinlock as the fans want Mizdow.

The pale one makes a comeback and hammers away in the corner but misses a knee in the corner. Miz kicks the knee out an dhits the short DDT for two. Sheamus knocks him out to the floor and Mizdow runs over and falls down and hold his knee right along with Miz. Both guys go under the ring and Sheamus pulls out the wrong one, giving Miz a countout win at 5:16.

Rating: D+. Mizdown is going to be another big face turn sa the fans are getting into him for how hard he’s working on this stunt double thing. Best of all, it’s something new that he’s done to revitalize his career after falling through the floor over the last year. I’m assuming Miz gets his title shot at the PPV.

The Total Divas go up to see the Real Housewife of Atlanta when the evil Total Divas show up. Cameron and the reality chick have a Diva off and that’s about it. I’m sure we’ll see more.

Nikki Bella/Cameron/Summer Rae vs. Brie Bella/Natalya/Naomi

Rosa is in the latter team’s corner and Nene Leakes comes out to join her. Natalya shoves Cameron into the corner to start as Cole recaps Total Divas from last night. The heels take over on Natalya with Nikki cranking on a front facelock. Summer misses a legdrop and Brie comes in off the ice cold tag. Everything breaks down and Brie flips out of the Rack and gets the pin off the Bella 3:41.

Rating: D. Figure this one out for yourselves. Next.

Cena gives his usual fired up promo talking about how the showdown with Ambrose is going to be violent and against the Authority’s wishes.

New Wyatt video with the Family disappearing and Bray talking about how she told him he’d never be alone. He’s going to leave a path of smoke and destruction throughout the world. He says it’s coming and smoke fills the barn as he sits in his rocking chair.

The Authority comes out to watch.

John Cena vs. Dean Ambrose

Contract on a pole and the Authority, Rollins, Orton and Kane are all at ringside. Ambrose stomps away in the corner to start but Cena easily stops his climb. Four straight suplexes drop Ambrose but he blocks Cena’s bulldog. Dean has a chance at the contract but goes outside to slug it out with Cena. He suplexes Cena on the stage but messes up his own back, allowing Cena to get down to the ring for an electric chair save.

Both finishers are countered and Cena puts on the STF. Ambrose finally figures out to bite the hand to escape and dropkicks Cena to the floor. He still doesn’t climb and launches a suicide dive instead but goes over to nail Kane for some reason. The Authority is about to fight Ambrose but Cena nails Dean and throws him into the Authority. Orton comes in and goes after Cena (no DQ remember) as everyone gets inside. Ambrose sends Rollins outside and Kane eats an AA, allowing Dan to grab the contract for the win at 6:27.

Rating: C-. This was a mess but they had to protect both guys. It’s not a terrible match or anything but it wasn’t meant to be anything more than a way to set up the two Cell matches. And yes, one of those matches is going to be Cena vs. Orton XXXIV or so. Seriously I don’t think that’s much of an exaggeration.

The two matches stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was the opposite of last week with a HEAVY focus on wrestling and very little stupid stuff. Yeah there’s the Divas stuff with the reality chick but that was about five minutes combined. I was dreading the reality stuff all night and the show actually won me over with some long matches and good seeds being planted for future stories. Really solid show this week and a huge relief after last week’s disaster.

Results

John Cena/Dean Ambrose b. Usos and Goldust/Stardust – AA to Goldust

AJ Lee/Layla b. Alicia Fox/Paige – Shining Wizard to Fox

Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

Seth Rollins b. Jack Swagger – Rollup with a handful of tights

Rusev b. Big Show via DQ when Mark Henry interfered

Miz b. Sheamus via DQ when Mark Henry interfered

Brie Bella/Naomi/Natalya b. Nikki Bella/Cameron/Summer Rae – Bella Buster to Nikki Bella

Dean Ambrose b. John Cena – Ambrose pulled down the contract

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

This week’s show was a very strange mix of comedy, cancer, hot dogs and HODA’S CRAZY DANCE. You don’t know what HODA’S CRAZY DANCE is? Well you’re in for a treat because HODA’S CRAZY DANCE involves middle aged women drinking wine, dancing, and Hoda being CRAZY. Oh yeah and there’s some other stuff. Let’s get to it.

Rollins opened the show to talk about what Cena and Ambrose did to him last week. He knows he’s a marked man and wants Ambrose to come out here right now. This brings out a charging Cena for a fight and Rollins runs into the crowd. Since this is wrestling, Ambrose is right there in the crowd waiting for him. They brawled back to ringside where Cena got his hands on Rollins again until Ambrose dove on both of them, allowing Seth to escape. The Authority came in and made Cena/Ambrose vs. Orton/Kane/Rollins. Decent but I’m getting tired of these handicaps.

We recap Big Show and Rusev. Big Show had to undergo sensitivity training, which thankfully we only heard about.

Ziggler and the Usos beat the Dusts and Cesaro. My goodness how many times do we have to sit through combinations of these matches before we get to the Cell?

John Cena was on the Today Show to talk about the breast cancer stuff.

AND NOW IT IS TIME! Kathy Lee and Hoda from the Today Show came out as Rosebuds to sit at a table and drink wine (apparently it’s a thing they do on their show). They talk about how much fun they like to have and how crazy they can get. Kathy is happy because they can be crazy here unlike on the Today Show, so Hoda does HER CRAZY DANCE! It’s just her lifting her arms in the air and dancing in a circle and the fans react as well as you would expect. They do the Adam Rose apron fall and that’s it. No breast cancer awareness talk, no interaction with anyone from Rose, nothing.

This is the kind of stupid pandering that wrestling fans get tired of. The entire segment felt like a waste of time and little more than trying to get middle aged women to watch Raw. Here’s the problem with that: yeah you might get eighteen bored housewives to watch your show for five minutes, but how many of your regular viewers do you think changed over to Monday Night Football or ANYTHING else to not have to watch this? It wasn’t funny, it wasn’t interesting, and it feels so totally out of place that it’s not worth bringing these two in.

Same Luke Harper video from last week.

Mark Henry destroyed Bo Dallas again but got counted out. Nothing to see here.

Cena and Ambrose had their big talking segment and said they didn’t want to hate each other but would go after the other if they had a reason. Cena wanted to bury the hatchet for one night but Ambrose said he was hungry and was going to Coney Island for a hot dog. These two aren’t going to have a big emotional fight, but the match should rock either way.

Ambrose got on a subway and left the arena. HHH caught up with Cena and said Rollins would have to start the match so Cena could get his hands on him at least once. HHH’s “Man, kids these days” line made me laugh.

Brie Bella beat Summer Rae with an arm tied behind her back. Again, nothing to see here.

Miz and Mizdow sucked up to Kane with a fruit basket and got a match with Sheamus as a result.

Jack Swagger beat Tyson Kidd with the Patriot Lock because Natalya wouldn’t help Kidd near the end. I have no idea where this story is going and I really don’t care.

Edge and Christian have a special after Raw on the Network but don’t have much to say about it. I need to watch that.

Roman Reigns was live via satellite to say he’ll be back soon. Again, nothing to see here.

Now we get to the bad part of the show. Like, the REALLY bad part of the show: El Torito vs. Mini Gator. This wasn’t funny, it wasn’t interesting, it didn’t have the Bunny (yeah it’s stupid, but are you telling me he’s not about a thousand times more interesting than these two?) and even the announcers ripped on it.

Rusev came out and got cut off by the Rock. I already wrote about this in detail so go here to read why this wasn’t a bad thing:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/10/09/new-column-ode-to-a-shovel/

AJ walked out on Emma, causing her to lose to Paige and Alicia Fox. Why that makes AJ more of a face isn’t really clear but I’m sure it involves MIND GAMES. They should just air parts of Michaels vs. Mankind from Mind Games whenever these segments are on.

Erick Rowan has been set free as well. The interesting part of this was a shot of a pregnant woman with the words IT’S COMING written on her stomach. I’ve heard rumors about this and I like where it could be going.

Miz beat Sheamus with a rollup, likely setting up their next feud. There were several pro-Sandow chants here which could lead to something.

Joan Lunden, another cancer fighting journalist, came out to praise cancer survivors in the audience. Yeah it’s cool, but good night do these things bring the show down.

A Real Housewife of Atlanta is going to guest star next week. Dear goodness this is going to suck.

Cena beat the Authority via DQ when they triple teamed him. Ambrose made the save with a Coney Island hot dog cart and condiments were spilled. The good guys cleaned house until HHH came out and made Cena vs. Ambrose at the PPV with the winner getting Rollins inside the Cell. I like the idea and it gives us a way around a stupid triple threat. Ambrose laid out Cena to a huge reaction to end the show.

This show was all over the place. The main event storyline is interesting but these handicap matches are getting old in a hurry. We’ve seen every possible combination of these matches and almost all of them end up in a DQ. We get the idea already and there’s nothing new that they can say with them. Thankfully there’s a match for the PPV now, but there’s still more work to do with it. Ambrose almost has to go over Cena and then Rollins if they want him to have legs though.

Then you have Rock and Rusev, which likely isn’t setting anything up but how many people has Rock ever complimented in a promo? That’s some rare air and Rock gave him a great rub. “BUT RUSEV DIDN’T CRUSH HIM!” No, he didn’t, and people thinking he should have make me shake my head.

Above all else though, we have the celebrity stuff which is what drove this show off the rails. Look, I get why WWE is doing all their cancer charity stuff and, while it’s heavy handed, at least it’s designed to raise money for a good cause (and for WWE to go “LOOK AT US! WE’RE DOING SOMETHING GOOD!”).

That being said, these speeches just bring the show to a grinding halt. They make anything after feel awkward because you have these thoughts in your head about people dying of a horrible disease and how serious it is. That makes it kind of hard to care about a 6’5 pale guy shouting FELLA you know? I get why WWE does these things and yeah they’re important, but they’re so out of place on a WWE show. The fact that they’re all over the show doesn’t help things either.

Overall Raw this week had way more bad than good, but the good stuff has me excited. Things will get better once we get to November and can drop the cancer stuff. Hopefully the celebrities go with them because having a Real Housewife and that Chrisley Knows Best guy don’t make me want to keep watching. They make me want to go write about how much I hate reality TV and miss interesting wrestling. That’s a bad thing to have your fans saying but WWE seems to like the idea. Or maybe USA does but it’s the same result.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 6, 2014
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re in the big city tonight and there are some potential big names in the house. I mean I’m talking KATHY LEE GIFFORD to tell us that breast cancer is bad here people. That’s WWE’s big deal at the moment: “Look at us! We’re doing charity work!” If you didn’t know that going in, don’t worry because WWE is going to tell you once every five minutes. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Dean Ambrose giving away a bunch of shirts and sliming Seth Rollins with the Money in the Bank briefcase.

Here’s Rollins to take over the show to start. He rants about how what Ambrose did last week wasn’t funny and demands to show the real clip from last week: Ambrose being curb stomped onto the briefcase. Rollins wants Ambrose to fight right now but he gets the new Stooges instead, telling him he needs to leave. Seth knows he’s a marked man and that’s just what he wants. Instead Cena charges out and chases Rollins into the crowd.

Seth stands there shouting at Cena and of course Ambrose is right behind him. Dean chases him into the ring and Cena gets in a few shots of his own, only to have Ambrose dive on both of them, allowing Rollins to escape. HHH and Stephanie come out and say this isn’t going to happen tonight. They ask the fans if they want to see Ambrose and Cena get their hands on Rollins. The fans of course agree so it’s Ambrose/Cena vs. Rollins/Kane/Orton tonight.

We recap Big Show’s apology on Smackdown for ripping down the Russian flag. Show has been undergoing sensitivity training and will be forced to listen to the Russians’ response tonight.

Cesaro/Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos/Dolph Ziggler

Before the match we get an inset promo from the Usos, imitating the Dusts’ weird stuff. Their tag line: bros before weirdos. Before the bell, the Dusts send Jey’s shoulder into the steps, giving us roughly the 4958^th shoulder injury of the year. Stardust hammers away on Jey and the bad shoulder to start before it’s off to Goldust and then Cesaro to stay on the injury. The fans want Ziggler as Cole reads off a cryptic message from Goldust. Off to Jimmy who chops Cesaro down in the corner and hits the Running Umaga Attack. Everything breaks down and Cesaro throws Dolph into the steps as we take a break.

Back with Stardust holding Jey in an abdominal stretch before it’s off to Cesaro for Ziggler’s elbow. Jey finally escapes and makes the hot tag to Ziggler to fire up the fans. Dolph speeds things up and spins around Cesaro to grab a sleeper. Cesaro is in trouble but escapes, only to get caught by a Fameasser. Everything breaks down again and the Usos dive onto the Dusts. Back inside Cesaro nails Ziggler with an uppercut for two as Jimmy makes the save. Stardust comes in off a blind tag and gets two off a reverse DDT. A triple superkick knockd Stardust silly and the Superfly Splash from Jimmy gets the pin at 12:15.

Rating: C+. Good match here but I’m sick of seeing these combinations fight. It’s a solid choice for an opener and the triple superkick looked good. We’re getting the two title matches at Hell in a Cell, but could we have another way to build them up, or some different opponents for a change?

John Cena was on the Today Show earlier today to talk about breast cancer. Two of the hosts will be here next.

Here are Hoda and Kathy Lee (the fourth hour hosts of the Today Show) with as Rosebuds. The girls come out in Ric Flair style robes and get in the ring to sit in chairs and drink Kathy Lee champagne. They suck up to the fans a bit and Hoda does her “crazy dance”. They break bottles over each other and this is just dying. The girls fall onto the Rosebuds off the apron….very slowly. If there was ANY point to this, it went right over my head.

Luke Harper video. I believe it’s the same one from last week.

Mark Henry vs. Bo Dallas

Henry lost to Dallas twice last week and has suffered an emotional breakdown after what happened with Rusev. Mark destroys him to start as you would expect and sends him into the announcers’ table. He tosses Bo into the barricade and loads up the table, only to have Dallas escape the World’s Strongest Slam and beat the count back in for the win at 1:50.

We recap the opening segment.

Here’s Ambrose to talk about not being thrilled with having Cena as his partner again tonight. We see a clip of Cena leaving him on Smackdown and Dean says he told Cena to not give him a reason to hate him. Ambrose wants Cena out here right now to talk about this and that’s exactly what he gets.

Cena takes a few mild jabs at the Brooklyn crowd’s response before talking about Ambrose diving on him earlier in the night. He says Ambrose understands his actions and leaves, but Dean says they don’t care about each other. If there’s one thing about each other, it’s that they don’t care what others think of them.

Maybe they can get along for one night, but Dean has no problem dropping Cena right now and fighting the Authority by himself. Cena gets back in and says Ambrose tried that already and got his head driven into cinder blocks. He likes that Ambrose does what he wants, but there are consequences for that. Cena says he can drop Ambrose right here and warns Dean not to give him a reason to not like him. Ambrose responds by saying he’s hungry and is going to Coney Island to grab a hot dog before leaving.

During the break, Ambrose left and got on a subway.

HHH comes up to Cena in the back. “Man, kids these days.” He basically laughs at Cena but John says he’s ready to go and will take out the Authority tonight. HHH likes his moxie and says Rollins will have to start the match tonight.

Brie Bella vs. Summer Rae

Brie is fighting with one arm tied behind her back like Nikki had to because this feud is still going. Summer kicks her a lot to start but a Layla distraction goes bad, allowing Brie to hit a running knee to the chest for the pin at 1:55.

Miz and Mizdow give Kane a fruit basket to apologize for their harsh words last week. Mizdow mouths every word Miz says a few seconds later. Kane doesn’t buy it and makes Miz vs. Sheamus for tonight. Mizdow takes the basket back.

Jack Swagger vs. Tyson Kidd

Kidd is taken into the corner to start but flips out to escape. He heads outside and hides behind Natalya so he can kick Swagger in the face but Natalya isn’t pleased. Back in and a neckbreaker gets two on Jack before we hit the chinlock. Swagger shoves him down and hits a quick Vader Bomb before slapping on the Patriot Lock. Kidd rolls away and kicks him from the apron before telling Nattie to get out of his way. He goes up top but Swagger runs the corner and pulls Tyson down into the Patriot Lock for the submission at 3:09.

Rating: C-. This was around to set up Kidd and Nattie’s issues on Total Divas because that’s what Raw exists to do half the time anymore. At least Swagger got a clean win, despite it being in a near squash. Natalya was there more as a plot device than anything else and that’s all she needed to be here.

Edge and Christian’s Smackdown 15^th Anniversary Special That Totally Reeks of Awesomeness airs on the Network after the show. The Canadians are in the studio to say the name and the Network price and that’s about it.

Roman Reigns is live via satellite and says he’ll be back sooner rather than later. This lasted about thirty seconds.

We recap Rollins costing Cena the title at Night of Champions.

El Torito vs. Mini Gator

Gator gets down on all fours and crawls after Torito, who mounts Horny (who else did you think it was?) and wraps him up with the cape. Fans: “THIS IS STUPID!” Heath gets in to try and help but gets Gator Rolled. Torito gores Titus off the apron and hits a top rope moonsault for the pin at 2:18.

We see Big Show apologizing again.

Ziggler is defending the Intercontinental Title tomorrow night on Main Event against Bo Dallas. Raw is for Hoda’s CRAZY DANCE though.

Here are Lana and Rusev for their usual bragging about Rusev and Putin. Rusev calls Big Show down but the big man is banned from wrestling tonight. Instead…..IT’S THE ROCK! Well that woke the fans up. Fans: “Holy ****!” Rock tells the Russians to know their role and shut their mouths.

This morning he woke up and went to the gym, but he doesn’t have his shorts up to his nipples like Rusev. Then he got on a jet and went to Queens, took a cab to Miami, went to Lana’s favorite place: the meat packing district, swam across the river to Staten Island and took the train to the Bronx so he could pay respect to the Captain Derek Jeter. That left him with one more borough to go to, so he crossed a certain bridge, went down Atlantic Avenue and came up to the Barclays Center and climbed into this ring in front of the millions and millions so he can say FINALLY the Rock has come back to Brooklyn.

Lana asks who Rock thinks he is and tells him to shut up. Rock: “And you need to stop dressing like a Soviet street walker.” Rusev warns Rock to leave or face getting crushed. Rock makes fun of his breath and tells Lana she’s beautiful in person, but she looks like someone shoved a Smirnoff bottle up her Putin.

As for Rusev, it doesn’t matter what he thinks. There’s a reason no one has been able to beat Rusev: he’s bigger, stronger and faster than most people in the back. However, the fans boo the Russians because they’re jerks to everyone else. Rusev takes off his medal and the fight is on with Rock easily dispatching Rusev.

Cole tries to talk about what’s going on tonight as Rock walks around ringside celebrating. He even goes into the crowd to hug some girls who can’t seem to stand up. Thankfully they keep the camera on him instead of going to recaps.

AJ Lee/Emma vs. Paige/Alicia Fox

I haven’t heard the fans go from a roar for one half of a tag team to dead silence like they did with AJ and Emma in years. AJ shoves Alicia around to start befor eit’s off to Emma for her marching. Fox sends her through the ropes but Emma hangs on and flips forward to kick Fox in the face. A dancing cradle gets two and AJ looks very confused. The Tarantula has Fox in trouble and the Emma Sandwich crushes her. Emma dances even more and AJ has had enough and walks out. The distraction lets Paige superkick Emma and nail the Rampaige for the pin at 2:48.

Video on Erick Rowan being set free just like Harper. Bray says they shall feel the smoke of his burning. We see what looks to be a pregnant woman’s stomach with the words “It’s coming” written on it.

Happy Birthday Bruno Sammartino.

Miz vs. Sheamus

Non-title. Miz takes him into the corner to start and snaps Sheamus’ throat over the top rope as the fans chant for Mizdow. Sheamus gets in a right hand to the ribs to stop Miz coming off the top but charges into a boot in the corner. He shakes off a Skull Crushing Finale attempt though and we take a break.

Back with Miz holding a chinlock before hammering away in the corner again. Miz puts on a kind of abdominal stretch on the mat as the fans think Mizdow is better. Sheamus fights out of the hold and loads up the Brogue Kick but Mizdow pulls Miz to safety. The Brogue Kick knocks Mizdow off the apron but Miz grabs a rollup for the pin at 10:12.

Rating: C-. Miz was more aggressive here and I like that he’s getting to do stuff, but did we need to pin ANOTHER champion, especially when he isn’t doing anything in the first place? Miz would probably be a better choice for the title right now but I’d like them to have a better way to get there.

Recap of Hogan’s speech last week. He hates breast cancer too you know.

Lawler introduces Joan Lunden (from the Today Show. Not that WWE says that), who is going through breast cancer. The fans are silent but at least applaud when she says she’s not giving up. There are a bunch of cancer survivors at ringside and each one gets an individual introduction. Cena comes out to hug her and that’s that.

One of the Real Housewives of Atlanta is going to be on Raw next week.

Edge and Christian still don’t have much to say.

John Cena vs. Randy Orton/Seth Rollins/Kane

Cena conducts the fans singing JOHN CENA SUCKS. I kind of like that he embraces it so much. Rollins has to start and the bell rings after 11pm because we needed to talk about cancer. Seth tags out to Kane less than thirty seconds in. Cena goes after Kane but keeps lunging at Rollins. The Authority beats him down and Rollins finally comes in, only to get punched in the face a few times. A Blockbuster puts Cena down for two but he lifts Seth up for the AA. Kane kicks Cena in the face to break it up and that’s the quick DQ at 4:33.

Rating: D. Yeah whatever. I’m so glad we had this match cut short for middle aged women dancing and a journalist from something not important enough to mention. That’s what Raw is all about anymore unfortunately, along with Authority vs. Cena/Ambrose ending in a DQ finish.

Post match Ambrose comes out carrying a Coney Island food cart. He pulls back his jacket to reveal ketchup and mustard holsters to spray on Kane and Orton. Cena AA’s Orton but he and Kane clothesline each other down. Ambrose beats Rollins up with various food iteams and tongs his crotch. Kane gets back up but takes an AA of his own. Cena and Ambrose are left in the ring and here are HHH and Stephanie with something to make the rumored matches for HIAC. It’s Cena vs. Ambrose with the winner facing Rollins in the Cell later that night. Ambrose DDTs Cena to the loudest non-Rock pop of the night to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was running with an anchor. There was a lot of good stuff here with the Rock’s appearance and the three way feud being gold, but dear goodness they tried their best to bring it down. Between HODA’S CRAZY DANCE to talking about cancer to the stupid bull vs. gator stuff, it’s like they were making an active attempt to get the fans ticked off. There’s so much good in WWE right now and so many bright spots on the horizon that I want to love it but the bad stuff is just SO bad that it’s crippling a lot of the good.

Results

Usos/Dolph Ziggler b. Stardust/Goldust/Cesaro – Superfly Splash to Stardust

Bo Dallas b. Mark Henry via countout

Jack Swagger b. Tyson Kidd – Patriot Lock

El Torito b. Mini Gator – Moonsault

Paige/Alicia Fox b. AJ Lee/Emma – Rampaige to Emma

Miz b. Sheamus – Rollup

John Cena b. Randy Orton/Kane/Seth Rollins via DQ when Kane and Rollins attacked Cena

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

At this point it’s pretty clear that Lesnar isn’t going to be defending the title at Hell in a Cell and at the end of the day, that’s probably the best thing they could do right now. Lesnar vs. Cena is a good feud but they need to give it a chance to breathe instead of just doing it over and over again to diminishing results. Instead we have Cena and Ambrose vs. the Authority which is a very nice option and far better than what we were sitting through at this point last year. Let’s get to it.

We opened with the Authority in the ring and Stephanie actually acknowledging the CM Punk chants in Chicago. They had to do something like that as the fans just want attention more than anything else. Heyman can out and had a chat with Rollins but not a lot was said. This felt like a way to distract the fans, because Heaven forbid we have a hot match to catch their attention because we need to have the twenty minute talking segment to open things up.

After all that was over, Rollins said he wanted the briefcase back because it has some personal items inside. Remember that as it’s going to be brought up later. Ambrose popped up on screen and said if Rollins wanted the briefcase, all he had to do was come and get it. This wasn’t the best opening segment in the world and it had the same problem most of them have: they spent twenty minutes to accomplish what could have been done in ten.

WWE doesn’t like breast cancer. This is the first of at least three times they would explain this.

HHH sent agents Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble to get the briefcase back. Those two as the new Patterson and Brisco is a fine idea. They wouldn’t find Ambrose until he came to the ring but apparently Jamie ate a hotdog at the concession stand. I can go with this going forward.

Ziggler retained the Intercontinental Title in a fast paced triple threat along with Cesaro and Miz. This was a good match with everyone moving around and Ziggler superkicking Cesaro to steal a pin on Miz. They can keep up the idea that Cesaro hasn’t gotten pinned clean yet and has a rematch coming to him. It’s like they’re building an actual division with progressing stories. That’s a VERY welcome change and something that could help the product quite a bit.

We get a Wyatt Family video which said Harper was free. This sounds like a way to split up the team and I’d prefer it over a fight. Bray could use some freshening up anyway.

Layla beat Rosa Mendes while Tyson Kidd messed with his phone. This is your Total Divas match and the first of three Divas matches tonight.

The big segment of the show was Ambrose coming to the ring with a bag and the briefcase. He offered to give away all the shirts because he didn’t like the prices on them. After throwing them into the crowd, the agents came in and tried to get the case back. This gave Ambrose the great line of “they’re sending the cruiserweight division after me?” Security came out (“weren’t you Rosebuds last week?”) and Ambrose left the case. Rollins opened it up and got covered with green slime. The look on Dean’s face was outstanding and sold the whole thing.

I’ve heard people calling this the segment that made Ambrose a star but that’s going a bit too far. This was very entertaining for one reason above all others: it was different. Those fourth wall jokes were funny and it made Ambrose feel like an outsider instead of the same old comedy guys. I remember JR talking about how bad comedy in wrestling can be if it’s not natural. With Dean, it felt natural and not like the script said “comedy segment here”. It’s definitely good though and the showdown in the Cell is going to be great.

Bo Dallas interrupted Mark Henry’s latest apology and beat him in about a minute. Henry destroyed Dallas in the back after a break.

Goldust and Stardust confirmed the Tag Team Titles were the Cosmic Key. Nothing else to see here.

Nikki and Brie did their usual argument and Brie had to face Cameron and Eva Marie in a handicap match. Amazingly enough, a former Divas Champion was able to beat a girl with maybe an hour combined ring time and a girl who doesn’t know how to make a proper cover. Nikki whining about having to be in a handful of handicap matches is really wearing thin and isn’t going to sell a big match between the Bellas.

Time for COMEDY with Heath Slater and Titus O’Neil beating Los Matadores. There was a bull, a gator and a Bunny involved. I can live with the Bunny because it’s showing off but the rest of the stuff was stupid. Again though, to people calling this the worst segment ever, I’d point out that the match wasn’t even three minutes long.

Rusev and Lana came out to yell at Big Show. The giant came out and ripped down the Russian flag. Naturally WWE issued an official apology about this because HEAVEN FORBID anyone get offended over something that is going to be forgotten after about thirty seconds. I’m complaining about this apology offending me. Where’s my official apology from WWE? I’m offended by how pathetic it is that people get offended by everything anymore. I WANT AN APOLOGY AND OFFICIAL STATEMENT! I MIGHT TELL PEOPLE TO PROTEST THE SHOW AND THAT MEANS THE STOCKHOLDERS MIGHT GET TICKED OFF!!!! LISTEN TO ME!!!!

Yeah I think some political correctness is stupid. Why do you ask?

Cena and Ambrose had a brief staredown in the back and tension was teased. They both want to beat up Rollins though.

Alicia Fox is Paige’s new best friend and beat AJ Lee in a nothing match. It’s better than repeating the same matches over and over again.

Sheamus beat Damien Sandow in another nothing match that doesn’t seem to set up anything.

Hulk Hogan doesn’t like cancer.

Stephanie told Kane and Orton that she doesn’t care about their complaints. Tension is being teased here.

Cena and Ambrose beat Orton and Kane when Rollins interfered. There was nothing to the match and it was your standard main event tag. Rollins gave both heroes curb stomps onto the briefcase to end the show.

This show was the standard Raw Special: it would have been great if it only lasted two hours, but the extra hour drags it down. The cancer stuff is going to get old in a hurry and comes off like more of a publicity stunt than anything else. Thank goodness we have another month of WWE saying CANCER SUCKS because they might come off as pro-cancer otherwise.

The wrestling wasn’t anything special but as usual they have a lot of good stuff coming up in the future. The problem though is them screwing up all of the upcoming stuff instead of it actually paying off. Or if nothing else they might have to worry about offending someone and apologizing for logical storylines. Again, either step on some toes or be perfect schoolchildren that don’t offend anyone and listen to the complaints that come with it. Pick something and stick with it though. Not a great show this week but it had its moments.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 29, 2014
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

CM PUNK! CM PUNK! CM….sorry just getting ready for the crowd later in the show. The main story at the moment seems to be the new Super Best Friends of John Cena and Dean Ambrose facing off with the Authority as Roman Reigns is out injured. There’s no sign of Brock Lesnar and it doesn’t look like he’s going to be at Hell in a Cell. That opens up some doors for interesting pay per view matches. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Authority vs. Cena and Ambrose last week.

Here are Stephanie and HHH as the announcers hype up the annual pink theme for breast cancer. The fans chant for CM Punk and Stephanie asks why the fans chant for quitters. It’s because they’re quitters themselves and would love to just quit their jobs when things get serious. Stephanie quickly switches over to Ambrose stealing the briefcase on Friday, which means nothing because the contract inside belongs to Rollins. This defiance of the Authority will not be tolerated.

This brings out Paul Heyman for his usual catchphrases and to talk about how close Cena got to becoming champion. Rollins got close as well, but how dare he try to cash in on Brock Lesnar with a curb stomp. Stephanie gets in his face but here’s Seth Rollins to interrupt. He doesn’t really apologize for what he did, but says everyone in the ring is glad Cena isn’t champion again.

Rollins wants to become champion by beating the best, which is clearly Brock Lesnar. Heyman isn’t cool with this so Rollins says Brock should see it as a compliment because it shows Brock is the best. Paul goes to leave but HHH stops him. They stare each other down but HHH just shakes his hand and says thanks for the talk.

This brings Rollins to Ambrose, who better return the briefcase and the personal property inside. If he doesn’t return it, the cinder blocks will look like nothing. Dean pops up on screen and holds up the case in the back, saying if Rollins wants it back he should just come and get it. The three head up the ramp but Cena runs out and jumps Rollins. Seth bails into the crowd, leaving Cena in the ring.

WWE doesn’t like breast cancer.

After a break, the Authority is in the back with some agents. HHH sends Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury to get the briefcase.

Intercontinental Title: Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Miz

Ziggler is defending after beating Miz for the title last week. Cesaro had a title shot on Smackdown and got pinned with his hands in the ropes. The challengers go after Dolph in the corner to start but get in a quick argument over who gets to try for the pin. Cesaro suplexes Miz down for two but Miz clotheslines the power guy down, sending Dolph into the corner. Miz gets gorilla pressed but Ziggler dropkicks Cesaro down, leaving Miz to crash onto the mat as we take a break.

Back with Miz sliding through Cesaro’s legs but Ziggler grabs a rollup instead. Everyone rolls up everyone for two until Ziggler DDTs both guys down at the same time. Another DDT to Miz and a neckbreaker to Cesaro get two on the Hollywood guy and send Cesaro out to the floor. Mizdow trips the champion and earns a baseball slide for his efforts. A sunset flip gets two on Miz but he comes back with a Figure Four attempt.

Cesaro nails Miz with an uppercut and tries a sunset flip of his own but Ziggler pulls on Cesaro’s legs, sending him head first into Miz’s crotch. Dolph throws Miz in the Figure Four but Cesaro makes the save with a double stomp. Miz goes up top but dives into the uppercut, only to have Ziggler superkick Cesaro and pin Miz to retain at 11:48.

Rating: C+. They did some different stuff in there and the match worked better than I was expecting it to. I’m digging this whole “having a division” thing as there are a lot of people who can feud over the title and have good matches like this instead of just doing aimless stuff. As usual I don’t expect it to last but it’s nice to see.

Mizdow is holding his knee just like Miz in a nice touch.

Mercury and Noble go Ambrose hunting but find the Rosebuds, Big E. and Great Khali instead.

WWE still hates breast cancer.

We get a freaky video from the Wyatts which keeps jumping all over the place and talking about finding someone after everyone was told he was gone. Bray asks what you give someone who has lost everything. He fixed someone and now he’s being sent out on his own. It seems like they’re talking about Harper. Luke says he’s piecing himself back together with pieces of you. Bray says Harper is set free. Harper gets close to the camera and says you’re doomed.

The Authority yells at Mercury and Noble for not being able to find Ambrose and possibly stopping for a hamburger. If they don’t find him, they’re fired. The new Stooges leave and Miz and Mizdow come in instead. Mizdow talks for Miz and complains about the rematch for the Intercontinental Title being a triple threat. HHH cuts them off and gives Mizdow a match with Sheamus and threatens to fire Miz.

Layla vs. Rosa Mendes

Tyson Kidd is at ringside messing with his phone because he and Natalya (also at ringside) are having marital problems. Layla takes Rosa down and grabs a chinlock until Rosa fires back with forearms. Rosa’s hair extensions fall out and Layla knocks her to the floor, triggering a brawl between Summer and Natalya. Kidd has no idea any of this is going on. Back in and the Layout beats Rosa at 2:58.

Natalya takes Tyson’s phone post match.

Ambrose is in the back with the briefcase and a bag.

Here’s Ambrose with the bag and briefcase in the arena. He throws in a table and sets the briefcase on top, saying he’s been at the concession stand. The agents came in but they were busy eating and didn’t see him wave. However, that’s not what he’s talking about here. Dean doesn’t like the way the Authority runs their merchandise stands so tonight we’re having a Dean Ambrose sale, but the briefcase isn’t for sale tonight.

Dean throws a bag of t-shirts on the table and says he’ll sell it for a dollar. First up is a Cena shirt for a dollar and a Sheamus shirt for a quarter. This brings out Mercury and Noble (Dean: “They sent the cruiserweight division after me?”) to ask for the briefcase. Ambrose says that’s fine but they have to come in and get it. The guys back away so Ambrose starts throwing the shirts into the crowd for free.

The agents come back with Rollins and security as Dean runs out of shirts. Dean: “Are you real security? I could have sworn you were Rosebuds last week.” Ambrose backs away into the crowd as Rollins finally gets up on the apron. Rollins opens the briefcase and green slime sprays on him. Dean’s “look what I did!” face is great stuff. He swears he had nothing to do with it and Seth freaks out.

After a break, Seth is complaining to the Authority that he could be blinded. Rollins is sent to the trainer and HHH makes Kane and Orton vs. Ambrose and Cena. Orton doesn’t like having to fight Rollins’ battles again. A phone ring and they’re not sure whose it is. It turns out that it’s in the briefcase and Rollins runs back in to say it’s an electric razor. Was that a vibrator joke?

Here’s Mark Henry with something to say. He starts apologizing to the fans for last week when Bo Dallas interrupts. Bo says Henry should apologize to himself instead of the people. It’s time to close the Hall of Pain and join the Hall of Bolievers. Being a Boliever means never having to say you’re sorry.

Bo Dallas vs. Mark Henry

Henry hammers away to start and pounds Bo into the corner, only to miss the Vader Bomb. A Bodog gives Dallas the pin at 1:45. JBL treats this like a huge upset.

In the back after a break, Bo says he won because he Bolieved. Henry attacks him from behind and crushes him with an anvil case a few times. Dallas is out cold. Henry says that’s what he does. That came off like a heel turn.

Network hype.

The Dusts are in the back looking at a crystal ball with electric lights going through it. Stardust looks at a chalkboard and babbles about various things. Stardust comes in and says the titles are the Cosmic Key and they determine their fates. Everything else is science fiction and Stardust shoves the ball away. The belts are science fact.

Brie Bella is here for a match when Nikki comes in to remind Brie that she quit in this building. Nikki yells at her for quitting for Bryan, starting a quick YES chant. That went so well for Brie because Bryan is still sitting at home. Nikki says Brie did it for the cheers and brings up all the handicap matches she was in for about the 1000^th time. Tonight Brie gets her own handicap match.

Brie Bella vs. Cameron/Eva Marie

Brie takes Eva down with ease because she’s a former Divas Champion and Eva has had about an hour of career ring time. Cameron gets kicked off the apron but Eva gets in a few shots of her own. Off to Cameron for two off a snap suplex and the fans start chanting for JBL. Brie fights out of the corner and now the fans are chanting for Cole. Cameron is sent into Eva and Brie gets a rollup for the pin at 2:57. Thank goodness they got out of there as fast as they did.

WWE still hates breast cancer.

Heath Slater/Titus O’Neil vs. Los Matadores

The Rosebuds are at ringside and Rose is on commentary with the Bunny at his side. Slater and Titus bring out Hornswoggle in an alligator outfit. Reverend Jesse Jackson is n the front row. O’Neil slams Diego down to start as JBL asks if Rose and the bunny listen to hip hop. Slater allows Diego to tag out to Fernando who cleans house until Hornswoggle comes in for a distraction, allowing Slater to grab a rollup for the pin at 2:42.

Torito and Hornswoggle have their showdown but Rose makes a save. Titus is low bridged to the floor and Los Matadores drop Slater, allowing the Bunny to hit a splash.

Here are Rusev and Lana to brag about beating up Big Show on Friday, only to have Big Show attack him with a right hand. This brings out Big Show who says everything said about Putin is a bunch of garbage. He brings up A Few Good Men for some reason by saying Lana can’t handle the truth.

We get the an unedited package on Big Show standing up for Henry and Rusev attacking Show with the Russian flag on Friday. Rusev says he wants to pull out Big Show’s guts and kick him in the groin. He’ll break every bone in Big Show’s body but Big Show says we don’t speak Russian. Big Show hits the ring and the Russians bail. He slowly goes over to the Russian flag and rips it down to a big reaction. Rusev finally gets back in and is thrown right back to the floor.

We recap Ambrose, Rollins and the briefcase from earlier tonight.

Cena says this is his kind of town and is glad he doesn’t have to face Dean Ambrose. They both want Seth Rollins and Dean pops up behind Cena and Renee. Cena asks if Dean would like to add something. Dean: “Not really.” They get in an argument over who gets to beat up Rollins and Dean says not even Cena can take food off his plate.

Alicia Fox vs. AJ Lee

Paige introduces Alicia as her new best friend. In a throwaway line before the match, Cole says the WWE Network will launch in the UK on November 1, not October 1 as they announced for months. AJ sends Fox to the floor to start before hitting a plancha to take both evil girls down. Back in and Paige offers a distraction so Alicia can get in a quick ax kick for the pin at 1:35.

Paige gives AJ the Rampaige post match and Alicia drops soda on her. She doesn’t open the cans or anything but just drops them.

Harper video again.

Sheamus vs. Damien Mizdow

Non-title and Miz is on commentary. Sheamus takes Mizdow down with a headlock to start but the stunt double escapes the ten forearms to the chest. Back in and Sheamus gets annoyed when Mizdow punches him so the beating is on in the corner. Mizdow comes back with Miz’s short DDT and drives some forearms to the pale head. Sheamus shrugs it off and hits the ten forearms before sending Mizdow out to the floor. The champ follows and sends Mizdow into Miz before taking him back inside for the Brogue Kick and the pin at 5:30.

Rating: D+. This was just a step above a squash and the step helped a lot actually. Mizdow isn’t going to be anything more than a comedy guy but at least he was able to get in a little offense of his own. They’re getting somewhere with the characters but a third person added to the mix might help.

Here’s a pink Hulk Hogan with something to say. He talks about breast cancer awareness month and says he’s turned in the red and yellow to go pink. There are a bunch of breast cancer survivors here and they’re the real heroes. We can buy gear at WWEshop.com to help fight breast cancer and it’s time for catchphrases.

Kane and Orton complain about having to take care of Rollins’ problems when Stephanie comes in and tells them to get over it. The people have been saying Orton and Kane have gone soft and lost their killer instinct. Kane asks if the people are saying that or if it’s just Stephanie. She wants to know if it really matters and that’s that.

Preview of the new episode of Monday Night War debuting after Raw. We saw this earlier.

Reigns will be here for an interview next week. Big Show vs. Rusev as well.

John Cena/Dean Ambrose vs. Kane/Randy Orton

Cena vs. Orton to start of course and the fans are already dueling. John takes over with a quick bulldog but Kane gets in a shot from the apron to take over as we go to our last break. Back with Orton getting two on Cena off what looked like the powerslam but having the RKO countered. He has to settle for the backbreaker instead but Cena is up at two. Kane comes in for a nerve hold and we actually look at Rollins being slimed twice during the hold.

Back to Orton for a chinlock as the dueling Cena chants begin. A big backdrop puts Orton on the floor and Cena does the big dramatic crawl to Ambrose before diving over for the tag. Ambrose speeds up with a pair of dives to the Authority before throwing Orton back in. Randy kicks him into the Rebound Clothesline and Dirty Deeds gets two on as Rollins runs in for the DQ at 11:47.

Rating: C-. The match was the usual boring stuff and you knew Rollins was going to interfere. I’ll give them this though: they’ve done a good job at putting Ambrose straight into Reigns’ spot and making it work. You can picture Reigns having the same promos and matches as Ambrose (well maybe not the sarcastic stuff) and it still works. Reigns will be fine when he gets back but maybe Ambrose can get a rocket strapped to his back in Reigns’ absence.

Dean fights Rollins off and dives at Kane, only to leave it short. Thankfully he pops back up and helps Cena corner Rollins in the ring. The heroes get in a fight over who gets to beat up Rollins though and Dean sends Cena out to the floor. Orton nails an RKO on Ambrose and Kane adds a chokeslam. Rollins plants Dean with a curb stomp onto the briefcase. Cena comes in for a save but eats an RKO and chokeslam of his own. A curb stomp sends Cena into the briefcase (Fans: “THANK YOU ROLLINS!”) and a bunch of replays end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This is what I’ve dubbed the Raw Special: a show that would have been awesome if they cut an hour, but as all the extra stuff thrown in there really drags it down. Between the THREE Divas matches and countless backstage segments with the Authority saying the same thing over and over to WWE REALLY HATES BREAST CANCER AND YOU SHOULD BUY OUR SHIRTS SO WE CAN GIVE THEM LIKE A PENNY EACH, the show felt way longer than it should have.

That being said, there were good things going on here. First of all, most of the bad matches were kept short and there was some good energy to a lot of the stuff. The Ambrose segment was really entertaining and felt like something different, which is what they need more than anything in the main event. We might even be heading towards Cena vs. Ambrose in the Cell, which could lead to Ambrose vs. Rollins. Maybe in the same night inside the Cell with Ambrose getting his big win?

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Miz and Cesaro – Ziggler pinned Miz after an uppercut from Cesaro

Layla b. Rosa Mendes – Layout

Bo Dallas b. Mark Henry – Bodog

Brie Bella b. Cameron/Eva Marie – Rollup to Cameron

Heath Slater/Titus O’Neil b. Los Matadores – Rollup to Fernando

Alicia Fox b. AJ Lee – Ax kick

Sheamus b. Damien Mizdow – Brogue Kick

John Cena/Dean Ambrose b. Kane/Randy Orton via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

It’s my favorite moment ever in wrestling and the loudest pop you’ll ever hear.On January 4, 1999, WCW had Kevin Nash lose the WCW World Title to Hulk Hogan via the Fingerpoke of Doom.  Over on Raw, the WWF Title was changing hands as well, which WCW decided to tell their audience.  Here’s what the hundreds of thousands of fans that changed the channel saw.

WWF Title: Mankind vs. The Rock

This is No DQ remember. This is the match that Tony Schiavone gave the ending away to on their show, shifting the ratings for the night because of it. DX comes out to back up Foley, because they couldn’t go to the hospital with Shawn or help defend him right? Rock of course has the Corporation with him.

Rock jumps him immediately and knocks him to the floor. He won’t let the Corporation beat them up because he wants to do it himself. How noble of our heel champion. Foley does his first sick bump of the match as he goes knee first into the steps and flies over them in a painful looking shot. These two always had mad chemistry together, which is something that could be said about most guys with Rock actually.

Rock does commentary during the match, which always cracked me up. He talks a bit too much though so Foley takes over. Foley does a promo of his own and we cut to a shot of Vince and Shane, but we hear a bell ring. Foley is down and Rock has the bell. Subtle. Rock Bottom through a table and Foley is in trouble. This has all taken less than three minutes so I’m not leaving much out at all.

To play up the spontaneous nature here Rock is in street clothes, as in the kind you would work out in. Corporate Elbow (debuted 5 minutes from my house) hits for two as this is ALL Rock. Foley with a spinning neckbreaker out of nowhere to get both guys down. Bossman throws the belt in and a shot to the head (sounded SICK) gets two as well. Double arm DDT onto the belt and Rock is in big trouble.

There’s Mr. Socko as the crowd has lost it. Mandible Claw goes on but Shamrock pops Foley with a chair. Billy Gunn takes him down and the brawl begins. Everything goes crazy and CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin comes out and everyone loses it. He caves Rock’s head in with a chair and pulls Mick on top for the pin and the world title as the roof is blown off the arena.

Rating: A+. This was about a shocking moment and excitement and a feel good story and they NAILED it. This is very personal bias heavy, but they’re my reviews so who cares?

DX puts Foley on their shoulders as the Corporation carries Rock out. Cole gets in the famous line of “Mick Foley has achieved his dream and the dream of everyone else who has been told you can’t do it!” This is one of the best feel good moment in WWF history as Foley was considered one of the best to never be world champion as he worked as hard as anyone else but was never given a serious shot at it.

He got the shot tonight and he won the title. Road Dogg does the big announcement of Mankind being the new champion to a HUGE ovation. Foley dedicates the win to his kids and takes a lap around the ring with the belt to end the show. This is my favorite moment in wrestling history, bar none.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

We’re coming off Night of Champions and things have to be shaken a bit due to Roman Reigns’ injury. There’s a big hole at the top of the card at the moment and thankfully Dean Ambrose seems to be there to fill it. The other interesting thing is going to be what happens to the title now as we should be heading towards Cena vs. Lesnar III inside the Cell, but that match is a bit played at this point. It should be interesting to see what happens in the next five weeks. Let’s get to it.

Ambrose came out to open the show and said he wasn’t dead. He promised to stay in the ring all night until he got his hands on Rollins. Instead he got John Cena who teased a brawl because he wanted to beat up Rollins as well. The Authority came out and thankfully Cena and Ambrose just went after them instead of hiding behind the big invisible wall. Rollins got chased to the back and stole a car to avoid a beating from Cena and Ambrose. Dean as the new half of the Super Best Friends could be interesting, though he seems more like a loner than team player. Granted he was part of the best team in years so maybe it does work.

Ziggler got the Intercontinental Title back with the same rollup with a handful of trunks that Miz won it with the night before. I have no idea what the need was to change the title again, but at least it’s being defended. Can we get some new challengers now though?

Video on Reigns being taken out. That could change a lot of things going forward. Someone with a lot of time on their hands should write a column about that.

Jack Swagger beat Bo Dallas again. I’m not sure what the point of having these three trade wins for 8 days is.

Natalya beat Summer Rae in the Total Divas match. Rosa and Layla brawled and still no one cares. Just let them be hot and shake their hips a lot. It’s the only thing people are going to be interested in.

Ambrose beat Kane via DQ when Rollins ran in. Kane wasn’t as useless as he usually was here but it was only a six minute match. Dean fought them off with a chair but was eventually locked in a room by the Authority. Stephanie got in a great line: “Have we ever thrown someone out that didn’t come back?” I love it when they actually pay attention to continuity with little things like that.

Sheamus and the Usos pinned Cesaro and the Dusts in your usual “take two feuds and throw them together” match. This was longer than it needed to be but entertaining enough at the same time. Cesaro and Sheamus hitting each other very hard is all they need to do and it worked here. Usos vs. Dusts is fine, but I’d like to see a few more teams added to the mix. You know, like a division.

Rollins confronted Orton about Randy saying the Authority had to put on Rollins’ fires from earlier in the night. Nothing much came of this but it could be a seed for later.

The Next Generation thing they were hyping was video game stuff. Like it is EVERY FREAKING TIME.

Mark Henry came out to apologize for tapping out last night. The Russians came out to laugh and challenged him to another match. Henry made up for tapping out to the Accolade by only passing out to it this time. To be fair I don’ thtink anyone really believed he was going to knock off Rusev.

Adam Rose and the Bunny beat Slater and O’Neil. I can’t help but like this as it’s so goofy but they’re making it so goofy. All the heat is going to go away when the Bunny is unmasked though.

The Bellas are now arguing over the name Bella. Seriously. This might trump Booker T. and Ahmed Johnson fighting over the letter T. in WCW.

AJ beat Nikki Bella because Nikki is awful in the ring.

Cena beat Orton via DQ when the Authority interfered. There was a box at ringside and, as everyone who has ever watched a wrestling show knew, Ambrose was inside it and helped Cena clean house to end the show.

It’s very obvious that Ambrose is substituting for Reigns but that actually works so much better. Ambrose is the natural rebel whereas Reigns is a wrecking ball and doesn’t really fit in a war against the Authority. In other words, Ambrose is more like Austin while Reigns is more like Batista. That’s a VERY good career to have and Reigns is going to be a big star, but there are a lot more places to go with Ambrose’s character. It might be a better idea to have him as the top guy, assuming the fans buy into them, which they seem to be.

The show was a nice change of pace from the stuff we’ve been having for the last few weeks. Lesnar not being around is good in this case as they need to have some more stuff other than just Lesnar vs. the hero of the month. Cena can get his rematch later but it’s nice to give that feud some time to chill instead of just beating it into the ground. Rebuild Cena and let others fight Lesnar for awhile. Good show this week but it’s more about setting stuff up for later than anything on Monday.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6