Monday Night Raw
Date: December 12, 2011
Location: Norfolk Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the Slammys! I used to love these things when I was a kid and they were so campy and entertaining. Now they’re just kind of here and they’re usually a way to have some minor stories set up for the next few weeks/months. The main event tonight is Cena vs. Henry, which somehow is a pretty big showdown. It’s also the go home show for TLC, which is kind of a minor aspect given the three hour nature of this. Let’s get to it.

We open with a Slammy presentation. This is for the Tell Me I Did Not Just See That Moment of the Year. Booker presents it…along with Horny. Horny has an afro wig and keeps doing chest bumps with Booker.

The nominees are:

JR dancing
Santino almost winning the Royal Rumble
A fan throws water at R-Truth
Miz impersonates Rock

It’s JR dancing. I can live with that as that was pretty awesome. JR comes out…and here’s Cole to cut him off because that’s what Cole does. Cole says JR is fat and Booker calls him a loser. Strap in people: Cole vs. Booker can go on for HOURS. Booker says JR can beat Cole in a rap off. Cole’s is awful and I think everyone expected that. JR says he doesn’t need music. His actually has something resembling a rhythm to it and there’s music to it anyway. And then he stops rhyming all together. Guess who the fans say win. This very well may have been the worst opening in the history of professional wrestling.

Oh and JR does a Spinarooni. Ok more like he looks like he has a heart attack and convulses on the mat for a bit.

Here are Foley and Ted DiBiase Senior to present the Holy Censored Moment of the Year. This pairing is about as awesome as anything in the history of, ahem, Mankind. They try to figure out why they’re paired together. DiBiase says that he is an ordained minister. Foley: “So if that makes you the holy, then I guess that makes me the…..” DiBise: *EVIL LAUGH*

The nominees are:

Sheamus powerbombs Sin Cara through a ladder
The RKO to a leaping Christian onto the steps
The ring breaking
Evan Bourne’s shooting star off the ladder

Gee I wonder what’s going to win. If you can’t figure this out, you fail. Show comes out to accept and thanks the Sports Entertainment Academy of Arts and Sports. He thinks the World Heavyweight Championship would look good next to the Slammy. Nice little promo for the match on Sunday and for his match which is next.

Big Show vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett says what he’ll do to Orton at TLC will earn him that award Big Show just won. Then again that award is for something unexpected and everyone knows what he’s going to do to Orton. After a break we’re joined in progress with Barrett on the floor trying to get up. There’s a table set up at ringside now. There’s also a chair and a ladder. Barrett avoids going through the table and hits a big boot to put Show’s head on the table.

Show gets up as Barrett is ready to jump and then the bald man breaks the table. With Barrett on the apron on the outside, Show chops him in the chest and knocks him into the ring. Barrett goes to the floor and brings in a chair. Show knocks it out of his hands….and wins by DQ at 1:38? It’s going to be one of those nights isn’t it?

Of all people, the Road Dogg is doing this one. Yes, that Road Dogg. He’s in a DX shirt and is doing the Pipe Bomb of the year, which I think is the weird moment of the year.

There aren’t any real nominees but more along the lines of a bunch of R-Truth moments plus a hand full of others. This is just a big comedy montage for all intents and purposes, which is a great reminder of some stuff, namely Punk and Truth. The winner is…..CM Punk. Ok I can live with that.

Punk comes out with….a mannequin? It’s got a blonde wig and a t-shirt that says…..OH MY GOODNESS IT’S A DYNAMIC DUDES SHIRT!!!!! Punk says that he wants to talk about something tonight that is a special cause. This person works behind the scenes and is incredibly boring, just like this mannequin. Naturally it’s Johnny Ace and Punk has a tribute video. It’s set to a song that I’ve heard before but can’t place. We get Dynamic Dudes clips in there too which makes this worth a smile. After the video Punk is trying not to crack up. He accepts the award on Punk’s behalf and does a decent impression of him.

Lita is here to present the Divalicious Moment of the Year. Yep she’s still hot. I don’t think half the people know who she is.

The nominees are:

natalya putting the Sharpshooter on Eve and I think Alicia.
Kelly winning the Divas Title.
Kharma destroying Michelle.
Beth’s top rope Glam Slam to Eve.

Of course it goes to Kelly because she’s supposed to be some kind of female hero or something. Beth comes out to take the award from her and gets slapped.

Santino presents the OMG Moment of the Year. The Bellas are with him and they look good in those red dresses. After an argument over whether it’s o-m-g or OMG (pronounced like a word), here are the nominees.

HHH tombstones the Undertaker.
Rock Bottom to Cena at Mania.
The Walk Out.
Punk Leaves With The Title.

HHH wins. Are you freaking kidding me? He makes his big return with the hammer…and walks to the ring without his award. HHH says the real OMG moment was having Taker carried out for the first time in his career. He says the Undertaker is no more. HHH takes credit for ending the Streak. Are you kidding me? We get the video of Nash hitting him with the hammer a few months ago.

He says that maybe their 16 year relationship was based on lies and this Sunday all the lies and deceptions end. On Sunday he’ll show the world that he’s right and that Nash is simply done. Well he was done 13 years ago. Do we really need a match for that? HHH leaves and implies he’ll hit Santino with the hammer but lets him run instead.

Otunga and Tony Atlas are here for the Trending Superstar of the Year. Tony does the laugh as Otunga tries to be serious. The award goes to whichever superstar listed is trending on Twitter the fastest. Get this over with. They’ll be in a fatal fourway with the winner of the match meaning nothing but the first to be trending winning the Slammy.

Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder

Or is the winner of the match the winner of the award? Do they have any idea what’s going on here? Ryder and Bryan send the champs to the floor and hit stereo dives as we take a break. Back with Ryder and Bryan squaring off and they change the rules AGAIN, saying that it’s whoever trends first. THEN WHY HAVE THE MATCH??? Bryan and Ryder have a decent back and forth segment with them hitting cross bodies to put them both down.

Rhodes and Ziggler tease a staredown but think better of it so they can stomp the good guys. They get in a shoving match and Bryan tries to steal a pin. Rhodes and Bryan have a LONG pinfall reversal sequence but Bryan is sent to the floor. Ryder follows him and Ziggler tries to roll up Rhodes. Alabama Slam to Dolph gets two. They take a second break with Cody standing tall.

Back with Rhodes having Ryder in a Figure Four which doesn’t last long. Rhodes charges into some knees in the corner but Dolph breaks up the Broski Boot. Everyone is in the ring and everyone goes down. Beautiful Disaster hits Ziggler for two and Bryan goes off with the rapid fire kicks to Cody. Bryan goes up but gets crotched. Ziggler gets drilled by Ryder but stops Ryder as he goes up. Both heels hit superplexes and everyone is down again. Rough Ryder to Ziggler, Cross Rhodes to Ryder, LeBell Lock to Rhodes, Sleeper to Bryan, Zig Zag to Bryan and that gets the pin at 15:22.

Rating: B-. Fun match but as Lawler said, the match wasn’t important. What was important was trending on Twitter. That right there sums up almost everything that is wrong with Raw anymore. They’re so obsessed with getting people to notice them and accept them because they’re trending on Twitter 50 times a night and they have to tell us they’re trending on Twitter 50 times a night and it drives people crazy. And they wonder why no one buys their PPVs and why no one is watching their shows.

Ryder wins the award, because the match was pointless. He gets a Zig Zag for his efforts.

Christian returns to present Game Changer of the Year. He gives himself courageous moment of the year first of all. This is for one moment that changes everything. Here are the nominees.

HHH telling Vince and the pink jacket that he’s relieved of his duties.
Edge’s retirement speech.
Kevin Nash returns.
Rock and Cena making the main event of Mania a year early.

Cena and Rock win, as they probably should. Cena says he should only get half of the credit for this and introduces Rock. Oh wait this is a live show so he’s not here. “But he said he’d never leave!” We do have a satellite clip though. Oh wait no we don’t because he didn’t have time for that either. “This is worse than JR’s rap.” He apologizes for Team Bring It for not bringing it. However, this makes the award mean more because Rock is going to see this soon and hopefully it fires him up even more. This award is for changing the game for a year, but at Mania they change the game forever.

Alberto Del Rio/The Miz vs. CM Punk/Randy Orton

Punk vs. Miz starts us off. Off to Del Rio vs. Orton quickly and the Viper gets beaten down by both heels. We’re in standard tag formula mode quickly tonight. Punk gets a hot tag quickly and cleans house but the GTS is broken up, allowing Miz to guillotine Punk on the ropes as we take a break. Back with Punk backsliding Miz for two. Del Rio comes in and works over the arm a lot.

This is your usual main event style tag match: it’s the same formula with one guy getting beaten down for a long time until the other big face comes in off a hot tag and cleans house to set up the ending. The Finale and the GTS are countered but Punk’s kick to the head of Miz can’t get the tag. Barrett runs in through the crowd to take out Orton. Miz can’t hit the corner clothesline but he counters the GTS into the Finale for the clean pin on Punk at 12:42. Forget what I said about the formula I guess.

Rating: C-. The ending was a VERY nice surprise and it gives some heat to the main event on Sunday, which is certainly a good thing. Not a horrible match but Del Rio and Miz are pretty weak in the ring. Del Rio is boring all around but that goes without saying. It helped to push the title match though so that made it a lot better.

Miz and Del Rio beat up Punk post match and he gets put in the armbreaker using the ladder.

Vickie presents A-Lister of the Year. And here’s Goldust to present with her. He says she wears more makeup than she does.

The nominees are:

The Muppets
Hugh Jackman
Snooki
Cee-Lo Green

And it goes to Snooki because the WWE is stupid. She gives a pre-recorded message.

Mark Henry says he’ll do more to Big Show Sunday than he has already.

Here’s Sheamus but he’s interrupted by Jinder Mahal. Ok then. He rambles for awhile and gets his head kicked off. That’s it. There’s a referee there but there was no bell and no cover or anything.

Rey Mysterio comes out to present Superstar of the Year. The nominees are:

Orton
Miz
Henry
Punk
Del Rio
Cena

Ace comes out and accepts for him because he’s banged up.

Second Coming video. The word control flashes on the screen to end this.

We hear a story about a soldier in Afghanistan that hugged Vince when she saw him and opened her phone to show him her son with a WWE Title belt. Her son and husband are in the front row. That’s cool.

Mark Henry vs. John Cena

This is due to Cena costing Henry a win last week over Ryder. The bell rang at 1055 so this isn’t going to last long. We go to a break less than a minute in. Back with Henry in control,. Cena tries a slam but falls backwards. Off to a neck vice but Cena suplexes his way out of it. He hits the Shuffle but collapses on an AA attempt which gets two for Mark. Henry calls Cena Mr. USA I think.

Cena avoids a powerslam and hammers away but the shoulders don’t put Henry down. Instead Cena jumps into a bearhug and he’s in trouble. He escapes for a few seconds and hits the Slam but falls down afterwards. Then some fire goes off and KANE is back. He has a modified version of the old music and looks like he’s wearing a metal mask. He chokeslams Cena and I guess it’s thrown out at we’ll say 9 minutes. The mask looks ridiculous, but he takes it off post chokeslam to reveal a more traditional one. There’s Cena’s match for Sunday I guess.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but the end was the whole point of it. Kane was someone that needed to return, if nothing else to give Cena something to do on Sunday. The mask being back….why? His video has the shot of him not in a mask, but he’s wearing one here. I don’t get it, but that sums up most of WWE at this point for me.

Overall Rating: D+. This show didn’t do it for me. I mean it really didn’t do it for me. The awards were pretty weak and while there were a few nice surprises, they didn’t really help get the show going, at least not for me. It wasn’t bad and I’ve definitely seen worse stuff, but this didn’t do much. The crowd didn’t care but I think that’s due to the nature of the show more than anything else. Too much talking too and not a good show overall, but it had its spots. Nice surprise at the end too.

Results
Big Show b. Wade Barrett via DQ when Barrett used a chair
Dolph Ziggler b. Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes and Zach Ryder – Zig Zag to Bryan
The Miz/Alberto Del Rio b. Randy Orton/CM Punk – Skull Crushing Finale to Punk
John Cena vs. Mark Henry went to a no contest when Kane interfered

Here’s TLC if you’re interested:

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 25, 1998
Location: UTC Arena, Chattanooga, Tennessee
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s FINALLY the go home show for Over the Edge so I think you know what the focus of tonight is going to be. Expect a lot of Nation vs. DX and a lot of Austin vs. McMahon/Love. The match at the PPV is a classic so I hope the show leading up to it can be as good. This isn’t a live show which means very little for the sake of this but I need to fill in more space. Let’s get to it.

Here are Vince, the Stooges, and cops to open the show. We recap last week with the Stooges and Vince (dressed in a costume) beat down Austin to let Foley get the real beating in. However that’s going to pale in comparison to what happens on Sunday. He says that he got away with assault last Monday. Vince runs down the stipulations of the match and what everyone is going to be doing. Cue Austin and the eruption that comes with him.

Austin curses a lot and tells the cops that he heard an admission of assault so cuff him. Somehow it actually works and Vince is taken away by the cops. The Stooges try to keep it from happening and Austin says that looks like obstruction of justice. That gets the Stooges cuffed as well and I can’t help but think that Patterson is a little aroused by this. Austin pulls out a beer and pours it over Vince as he’s taken away.

Legion of Doom vs. Disciples of Apocolypse

It’s a six man here with the debut of Droz. His name is Puke here but screw that. He gets beaten down by Chainz on the floor. Well so much for that. Animal vs. let’s say Skull starts us off. Off to Droz who hits a clothesline and then gets beaten down again. He can throw a decent dropkick though. That’s enough for him I guess as he goes out quickly. Still better than Garrett Bischoff.

Hawk (who still doesn’t look right with hair) is beaten down in the corner after being in control for about 4 seconds. Well to be fair he was supposed to be drunk or high so it’s kind of excusable. Chainz and Hawk collide which lets Chainz get two. Can we have Hawk shoot up in the ring? It would be more entertaining than this. Off to Droz and everything breaks down. Droz hits a three point clothesline and a Batista Bomb on Chainz for the pin.

Rating: D. This feud was so boring and thankfully I think it ended very soon after this. I don’t think it was so much about the feud being over as much as Vince falling asleep from it. There’s no chemistry at all and the Warriors are just old here. Droz didn’t help things and his pill pusher character never went anywhere. Granted that could be because he was crippled.

Vince and the Stooges are led away in handcuffs. Austin talks more trash to them.

Dan Severn vs. Owen Hart

We get a video of Owen turning on Shamrock before this starts. Gee, I wonder what the ending of this is going to be. Severn is the NWA World Champion and that belt on Raw is still a bizarre sight to see. He takes Owen down very quickly and tries a cross armbreaker but Owen manages to avoid it. Severn chokes away and Owen starts throwing punches. The crowd really doesn’t care here. And then Owen kicks him low for….not a DQ? They go to the mat for a bit and Severn gets an armbar to draw in the Nation for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was nothing, partially because Severn really wasn’t an interesting wrestler at all. And people wonder why ROH gets eye rolls when they bring him in as a big deal. The match was just for the postmatch beatdown, but I really don’t get the point of this for the most part. It was pretty worthless for the most part though.

The Nation destroys Severn but they can’t quite Pillmanize his leg due to referee interference.

Austin was on Celebrity Deathmatch last week and will be again this week.

Vince is still in the squad car.

Edge is still coming.

Here’s the Jackyl who has with him Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf and Crackhead Bob from the Howard Stern Show. Hank had recently been voted the World’s Most Beautiful Person by People Matazine’s website so he curses about that a lot. Bob yells a lot. This is stupid if you couldn’t tell. Jackyl says we’re not done yet and brings out Luna, Golga (Earthquake) and Giant Silva.

Golga vs. Thrasher

If you don’t know what’s coming here, you’re beyond my help. Bob sits in on commentary while the dominance commences. Total squash of course that takes longer than it should. It ended with a powerslam if you’re interested. Silva beats up Most for fun. The referee too.

Vince is still in the car as Austin talks trash to him.

Vader vs. Jeff Jarrett

Austin has agreed to let Vince and company go if certain conditions are met. No word on what those are yet. Vader pounds Jarrett down and hits a splash but there’s no referee due to Tennessee Lee. Then he does it again. Jarrett goes after the knee as Vader goes after Lee. The fans cheer for Vader but they don’t know what they want to see right Vince? Jarrett works over the knee until Vader runs over him. I’ve always liked that. Vader hits a middle rope splash but Kane runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Better than the opener as the fans were into it, but still pretty dull. Jarrett was so freaking boring as the country singer guy and it was no exception here. He wuldn’t change characters until like July and it couldn’t have come soon enough. Vader still had it but they were already burying him, saying he wasn’t in top shape on commentary. The second run-in finish of the night isn’t helping things either.

Kane destroys Vader post match.

Vince is out of the car. Austin makes him apologize but Vince calls him the former champion. That’s not good enough so Vince has to do it again. Austin says Vince is a good kid and they all get unhancuffed.

Here are Vince and the Stooges after the second hour begins. No commercial though which makes this seem more realistic. Vince looking all messed up is a nice visual. He freaks out on Austin for treating him so badly and insists he DID NOT mean his apology. Austin made a condition that there had to be a WWF guy at the match Sunday to keep Vince in line. Vince is cool with that because no one on the roster can intimidate him. He makes Austin vs. Taker tonight.

DX was at an airport earlier. This is another of their “secret missions”. HHH had a speech but says Raw is too full of hot angles so they have to cut it short. HHH is going to be flying the plane and says it’s a very dangerous mission so he may never see them again. He gets in the wrong plane and that’s it. Ok then.

Al Snow jumps the guardrail and gets in the ring. Then he gets out of the ring and grabs Jerry, demanding his meeting with Vince. Security pulls him off.

Taka Michinoku vs. Dick Togo

Taka is Light Heavyweight Champion but this isn’t a title match because he’s not allowed to defend the title I guess. Also, Togo still has the best name EVER. There’s a spin wheel kick by Taka to send Togo to the floor and there’s his signature dive to the floor. Back in and another dive runs into a dropkick. Taka gets knocked into the railing and there’s a flip dive from the apron. Togo grabs a nerve hold for about a second and then hits a powerslam for two. Taka fights back but his tornado DDT is countered. A standing rana gets the pin for him though.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it was pretty uninteresting. This feud went on for awhile until they pulled the plug on Taka as champion and had him join Kai En Tai, putting the Light Heavyweight Title on this new guy named Christian who had a little bit better career I’d certainly think. Fun match, but it had nothing on what WCW was doing at the time and this division never did.

Post match the other Kai En Tai members come in and beat up Taka.

Back to the airport for more DX hijinks. Apparently HHH has flown off and they have no idea where he went. They all suggest they can fly after him but no one does. Rockabilly is mentioned.

Marc Mero vs. Farrooq

Sable forcibly rips the rope off Mero and he’s not happy about it. Mero starts off fast but gets caught in a powerslam. We go to the floor where Mero hides behind Sable. Mero stomps away again and Sable pops up on the apron. Mero tells her to get down and walks into a clothesline for the pin. This was just for the Sable/Mero stuff.

Mero freaks out on her post match and says that on Sunday, Sable can bring anyone she wants to meet him in a match. If they do, she’s free. If he wins, she’s gone forever. It would wind up being her vs. Mero with Sable losing. She’d be back in a few months.

Video on Pat Patterson and how awesome he is.

HHH is flying around (“I’m in the COCKpit!”) and says he’s flying around Nitro, writing messages in smoke for the WCW fans, such as DX Rules, WCW Sucks! Stupid but I’ve seen worse.

HHH vs. The Rock

This works. Non-title here. Before we get started though, Rock says the fans want to know how he feels about Viagara. However, since he doesn’t need it, he has no comment on it. He’ll also beat Farrooq on Sunday. As for HHH, DX is obsessed with their anatomies. Rock has something hard waiting for him: the Rock Bottom. After a break, here’s HHH and we’re ready to go.

Feeling out process to start and they’re more or less playing chess with each other. They trade headlocks and both guys go to the floor. Chyna interferes but is counteracted by Mark Henry. Back in the Rock takes over. Henry interferes, drawing Chyna up to the apron. The distraction allows a belt shot to HHH but Chyna makes the save and we take a break. Back with the People’s Elbow getting two.

HHH fights back with a clothesline and a crotch chop to Henry. Henry gets on the apron so Chyna pops Rock with a title as well. That was nice. HHH drops the knee (missed by four inches) for two. He stomps away but Rock hits a swinging neckbreaker to get two. Pedigree is countered into a backdrop to the floor. Henry stomps on HHH but Chyna pops him with a chair. HHH saves her and they fight on the floor to a double countout.

Rating: C-. Rock vs. HHH is one of those matches you always have to take a look at. This was nothing special but they would really heat things up over the summer, culminating in one of my all time favorites at Summerslam in their ladder match for the IC Title. The ending had to be that way because they were both champions, but you could see the chemistry out there.

HHH says bring it and Rock leaves. Farrooq pops up behind the future Great One and piledrives him on the stage.

Vince is going to be the guest referee for the main event.

Steve Austin vs. The Undertaker

Before Austin arrives, Taker chokeslams Vince. He loads up the Tombstone but here’s Kane. They slug it out and fight into the crowd. With Vince down here comes Austin. Stunner to both Stooges and he ties Vince up in the ropes. Austin grabs a chair and Vince is panicking. Here’s Dude Love with a chair of his own but Austin is ready for him and smacks his chair into Dude’s into Dude’s head. It’s so refreshing to see smart faces.

Overall Rating: C+. If there’s one thing Raw never did wrong at this point, it was the go home show. This set up the PPV perfectly with I believe everything outside of Jarrett vs. Blackman getting some time and I think we’re all thankful for that. Not much as far as wrestling goes but it’s 1998 so I don’t think anyone is surprised by that. Good stuff though and we got a classic main event out of Austin vs. Foley.

Here’s Over the Edge if you’re interested.

http://forums.wrestlezone.com/showthread.php?p=1111563#post1111563

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

Who do you think it is?  We’ve seen videos for it time after time, but who do you think it is?

My guess:Unfortunately I think it’ll be Jericho or Undertaker.  It’s a shame but I think those are the only realistic options.  Jericho is a guy I wouldn’t mind coming back, but i want him as a face.  HIs heel stuff is entertaining enough, but he comes off like a second class level guy as a heel most of the time.  Losing to Cena like 5000 times didn’t help this.  Taker I’m just over at this point.  Get to 20-0 already so he can retire.

Your thoughts?

The ratings are down again this week and so I’ll throw the title question out to you: how would you make Raw more exciting/better?

My theory:Make the show more cliffhanger based.  There’s almost no reason to watch from one week to another unless you already watch the show.  When you think about it, when is the last time you saw a Raw end where you had to tune in the next week to see the next part of a story?  Everything is self-contained anymore and it’s like they’re starting from scratch every week.  I’m not saying have it turn into Nitro with everything being a cliffhanger where you have to TUNE INTO NEXT WEEK’S NITRO TO FIND OUT, but make it more than so and so stands tall to end the show.  That gets really boring really fast.

Oh and stop talking about Twitter and promote your shows.

Your thoughts?

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 5, 2011
Location: St. Pete Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

There are two shows left before TLC and one of them is the Slammies so this is going to be a normal show by comparison. Last week’s show rocked so let’s hope this one can do the same. For some reason they’re trying to push the idea that all of a sudden Cena is having so many issues with the fans after saying for years that its their right. As usual, WWE doesn’t get that some people have no idea what they’re talking about. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Cena to kick things off. He talks about last week with Piper and how the fans have a mixed reaction to him. He says that he knows the fans aren’t all in love with him, but without them, there’s no show. Without the fans, there’s no work. Therefore, every fan has earned the right to think whatever they want about him.

However, the thing that mattered last week was the slap to the face of Cena. He kind of drops that though and starts talking about CM Punk. He says that the only thing bigger than Rock vs. Cena at Wrestlemania is Rock vs. Cena for the WWE Title at Wrestlemania. That brings out Del Rio. Oh geez not a #1 contender match between these two. Del Rio brings up the “If Punk gets disqualified he loses the title” thing from last week and shows the clip of the GTS to the exposed buckle last week.

That brings out Vickie with Ziggler. She says it should be Dolph that should get the title shot. I can’t really argue with that one. Dolph says he’ll be a dual champion and blah blah blah. Cena says Dolph is the Show Off now (because he heard Cole say it 25 times last week) but it should be Jerk Off. Ziggler says if the two of you want to have a #1 contender match for the US Title, go ahead. Cena says that the US Title shot belongs to Zack Ryder.

After Ziggler talks about how that’s a dead horse, here’s Miz because we don’t have enough people out there yet. We get some clips of Miz beating up Morrison and Truth, along with an announcement that Morrison has been released. Miz says that the Slammies are next week and he’ll be superstar of the year.

As he’s talking, here’s Johnny Ace who says he’s not boring. I had to rewind things because I dozed off there. Tonight there are going to be four matches, each pitting one of these guys against a Smackdown guy. The winners will ALL go to the WWE Title match at TLC. Oh wait not Cena because he’s in a special match called a “social experiment” which Ace will tell him about later. Miz’s match is right now against this man.

The Miz vs. Randy Orton

Basic start with neither guy really being able to take over. Orton tries to speed things up but Miz takes over with a Garvin Stomp and a running shot for two. Time for the chinlock and now we’re off to Twitterville. Orton makes his comeback and hits the powerslam. They head to the floor and Orton slams him again. Cue Barrett for the distraction at a count of eight and Orton goes after him. Miz wins via countout at 4:32.

Rating: D. Nothing match here which was only around to get Miz into the title match and have more development with Barrett vs. Orton. Once that match finally happens they have to have Barrett win to keep up his momentum. The match SUCKED though and was painfully boring overall. Nothing to see here.

Video on WWE Network. It’s coming in 2012.

Ryder wants to talk to Ryder about the petition and says it doesn’t matter. Cue Cena in Ryder gear who goes on a rant about the match that Ace has planned for him. He even makes a Back to the Future reference for some reason. The Social Experiment is a match with Ryder. Uh….ok? If Ryder wins, he gets a US Title match. If Cena wins, he’s in the title match at TLC.

Otunga says that it’s Nash vs. HHH in a ladder match. Why? Apparently there’s going to be a sledgehammer above the ring and whoever gets it first gets to use it. Nash is cool with that. Nash starts to leave and Otunga says Nash has a match. He doesn’t care who it is.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is all taped up from the cage match on Tuesday. Del Rio works over the ribs to start (psychology as always), even draping him over the top rope. And then the cross armbreaker ends this at 1:48. That’s pretty much a squash, but at least Bryan was injured coming in.

Tribute to the Troops is next week.

Eve Torres/Kelly Kelly vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix

If I didn’t write reviews for these shows, I’d be off to find a hot pretzel. We get a message from the heels but we get interrupted by a second coming video. He arrives on January 2, 2012. Ok then. And then announcers ignore it. Beth starts with Kelly and Kelly gets beaten down….and then Kelly hooks a small package for the pin at 1:10.

John Cena vs. Zack Ryder

This feels like a big match. Think about that for a second. Both guys are tentative to start. They fight over a long headlock and the fans are split as usual. Hip toss gets two for Cena. Notice something here: Cena is respecting Ryder and that’s the biggest rub Ryder can get. Ryder grabs a spinning neckbreaker for two. This is very slow.

A tornado DDT gets two for Ryder and he loads up the Rough Ryder. Cena ducks and initiates his finishing sequence. The AA is countered and Ryder puts him in the corner. Broski Boot looks to set up another Rough Ryder but Cena catches him in mid air and the AA is enough for the pin at 6:47.

Rating: C. The match was boring, but the important part is that they made Ryder look solid here. They needed to make sure that he saved face here and that’s what they did. Cena had to win here because Ryder would have been way over his head. Still though, dull match and i’m not sure why they did it.

Ryder is mad post match and Cena says hang on a second before running to the back.

Cena comes up to Ace and Otunag in the back. He shouts Otunga out and tells Ace to listen to the people and make Ryder #1 contender to Ziggler. Ace says no because Ryder blew it. Cena gets in his face and says be creative. Ace says Cena has to give up his title match at TLC. Cena isn’t sure of course but says he’s a ten time champion because he got opportunities along the way. Cena drops out and Ryder has to face….someone still. Ok then.

Kane is still coming again. That’s different than the Jan 2 thing. This video shows pictures of big named stars and Kane punching through a piece of glass. He puts the mask back on and opens his eye…then drops the mask which is on fire. It says his name this time. No date is given.

Otunga tells Robers to make this in essence a street fight.

Zack Ryder vs. Mark Henry

I think I smell interference. Henry has a bad ankle/leg here. Ryder gets beaten down like a chump to start which to be fair, he’s in over his head. Ryder gets him down for a second and rams the leg into the post. Cue Cena who hits the AA on Henry and throws Ryder on top for the pin at 2:20.

Vickie says she can’t get the decision reversed. Oh and Ziggler has to fight Sheamus later.

Kevin Nash vs. Santino Marella

Nash hits a side slam to start. Cole: “One, two, kick out by Santino…for some reason.” Powerbomb ends this at 1:03.

Post match Nash picks up the hammer but doesn’t hit Marella with it.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus

Feeling out process to start until Ziggler hits a GREAT dropkick for two. Sheamus is like “Irish story!” and hammers away with the forearms to the chest. Ziggler hooks a chinlock and a Fameasser gets two. Ziggler chokes again but Sheamus fights back, hitting a forearm in the corner. He loads up the High Cross but Ziggler escapes and Sheamus hits the post. Here’s Ryder for the distraction so that the Brogue Kick can keep Ziggler out of the world title match at 4:32.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was nothing all that great. Still though, they didn’t really have a ton of time to work with out there. Ryder interfering was fine because it gives Ziggler a reason to want to beat him up at the PPV. This was more about a storyline than a match and that’s fine.

Rough Ryder to Ziggler post match.

Del Rio and Miz are in the ring and here’s Ace as well. He mentions Clay debuting but it hasn’t happened yet. Henry vs. Cena next week. Here’s Punk for the contract signing. Punk pulls the table back to him and says this is the biggest WWE staple cliché there is. They always end in a brawl (which he’d love to have trending on Twitter) and since there’s no such thing as creativity by Ace, he figured we’d have the first peaceful one of these since Mania III.

Punk tells Ace to play Jack Tunney so we can sign this and get to brawling. Ace makes it a TLC match at the PPV and Punk is cool with that. Punk runs both guys down and Miz says that he took Truth and Morrison out. Punk: “Like on a date? I bet it was to that new Twilight movie. NOT THAT THERE’S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT!” Funnier in delivery. Ace looks right at the camera and wishes Morrison the best in his future endeavors.

Miz says he’s a must see start, Punk says he doesn’t care. He’s not about TMZ but about being the best wrestler in the world. Alberto jumps in and says they’re crying too much. He says his usual stuff and Punk cuts him off, saying if Del Rio talks about destiny again then he’ll start drinking. Del Rio says just sign it and Punk wants to know if they can fight after that. Punk signs and I must have missed the heels signing.

Ace wishes them all luck and asks a WWE.com photographer in for a photo op. Punk: “EVEN YOUR CONTRACT SIGNINGS ARE BORING!” With that he blasts Miz and the brawl finally gets going. Ricardo is loaded into the GTS so Del Rio hits Punk low. Del Rio stops to move furniture around but Miz runs in and tries the Finale on Del Rio. Punk breaks that up and hits the bulldog out of the corner to Del Rio through the table. A GTS to Miz and Punk stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked the show tonight as it advanced the two title matches for the PPV. That really needed to happen and they got it done which is really all you can ask for from a show. The wrestling was kind of weak but they certainly pushed stuff tonight and the storylines are a bit more interesting now. Good stuff for the second week in a row from Raw. When’s the last time you heard that?

Results
The Miz b. Randy Orton via countout
Alberto Del Rio b. Daniel Bryan – Cross Armbreaker
Kelly Kelly/Eve Torres b. Natalya/Beth Phoenix
John Cena b. Zack Ryder – AA
Zack Ryder b. Mark Henry – Pin after an AA from John Cena
Kevin Nash b. Santino Marella – Jackknife Powerbomb
Sheamus b. Dolph Ziggler – Brogue Kick

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 28, 2011
Location: Colonial Life Arena, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Things are a little bit different tonight and I’m not sure where they’re going to go tonight. Truth has been wellnessed away for the next month so I’m not sure what Miz is going to do. The main event tonight is Alberto vs. CM II so maybe we’re going to get Miz vs. Punk next? It’ll be nice to get through Del Rio’s title push though as he’s not interesting at all as the champion, given how much they’ve crippled him over the last five months. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.

We open things up with Piper’s Pit. He talks about how the fans have made him what he is today with their energy and all that jazz. Piper was never the biggest, the strongest, the best etc, but the fans made him what he was with their energy. Tonight his guest is someone who doesn’t care as much about the fans’ energy: John Cena.

Cena isn’t sure what he means about the fans not mattering to him. The Hot Scot plays a word association game with the fans where he says a legend’s name and the fans cheer for him. Then he says Cena….and the fans cheer for him. Cena says that’s the fans’ choice and that’s fine. Piper keeps trying to force this because Cena has to tell the fans what he thinks of them instead of just taking it because if he doesn’t, he’ll lose at Mania.

Cena says you’re going overboard with this. He talks about all of the big shows and matches he’s been on where he was booed out of the building, like Mania 22 and MITB and the TLC match in Toronto and One Night Stand (no opponent listed) which made MITB look like a bunch of schoolgirls. Cena says MSG was just New Yorkers being New Yorkers. Piper keeps pushing it and Cena points to some kids in the front row in his gear, saying that they’re having the time of their lives. He had three Make-A-Wish meetings today and they’re all here.

He tells Piper to read his shirt (Rise Above Hate) and says that’s why he’s going to be ok at Mania because he’s going to be himself as he’s always been, even with the fans booing. Piper talks about how his generation gave the torch to Cena’s generation and Cena’s generation raised it. However, that isn’t going to be enough because Piper says Cena is going to be in denial and hands him the Hall of Fame ring. Cena says he’s in a good place so Piper slaps him. Cena walks off and is mad. That came off as forced for the most part, because Cena was rational about the whole thing.

John Morrison vs. The Miz

This is falls count anywhere. Miz comes out with a ball bat or a pipe or something and jumps Morrison with it during Morrison’s entrance. He hits Morrison’s leg with it about 15 times and Morrison is down. I guess this is how Morrison leaves us. Morrison is being carried out but says he’s going back. He hobbles to the ring and they ring the bell. Morrison takes him down but Miz gets a shot in to the knee and wraps it around the post. R-Truth will be out a few weeks according to Cole.

Miz pulls out a kendo stick for a shot to the knee but somehow Morrison fires off a clothesline. Morrison picks up the stick and wears Miz out with it as they head to the floor. Miz tries to crawl up the ramp and Morrison uses the cane for a cane. That’s smart. Miz sends him face first into the big WWE logo though and Morrison is down. There’s the Skull Crushing Finale on the stage and the referee calls the match off at 3:24 with Morrison out cold.

Rating: C+. I enjoyed this one as Miz looked like a killer out there. His in ring stuff has always been the weakest part of his game so keeping him like a killer like this on his own is the right thing to do. I liked the match too as the history and emotion in it carried it to a better match than it should have been. Also this is a better and more definitive way to send Morrison off as it lets Miz get a push too. Good stuff.

Morrison goes out on a stretcher as Miz has a mic in the ring. He says this week it was John Morrison, last week it was R-Truth and next week, who knows? He’s the only superstar that can make this kind of impact. His face is completely stoic as he says this. Miz says he can do this because he’s awesome. I’m digging this.

Alicia Fox/Kelly Kelly vs. Bella Twins

They do the whole second coming thing on the Twitter graphic here. Beth and Nattie come out to th ringside and job around the ring. Then they leave. Ok then. Everything breaks down and Alicia gets a legdrop on a Bella for the pin at 1:45.

Video on Sheamus being all awesome.

Johnny Ace is on the phone and you guessed it: Brodus debuts NEXT week. Otunga comes in and wants to know why Ace is holding off Brodus’ debut for so long because he’s going to be mad. Ace says it’s to make Brodus mad. Alberto comes in and says he’s ready. Ace is worried about sponsors with Punk as champion. Speaking of the champion, he comes in and calls Ace spineless, Del Rio boring, and Otunga something about Jennifer Hudson. Punk leaves and it’s announced that if Punk gets intentionally disqualified, he loses the title.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

Barrett is on commentary. An inset Ziggler interview says he’ll win and show off. These two almost always have good chemistry so the match should be good. Ziggler grabs a quick rollup for two but Randy drills him with a clothesline to send him outside. Orton stomps away and Cole says vintage. He’s a lot less annoying tonight. Ziggler pounds him down and takes over as we head to the floor.

We get our first (I think) Twitter Trending line of the night and King talks about the WWE Social thing. Ziggler goes up but gets caught in a superplex from the top. That gets two and we take a break. Back with Orton hammering away and there’s the elevated DDT. He loads up the RKO so Ziggler RUNS, like an intelligent guy. Barrett gets up on the apron and Orton dropkicks him down, allowing Ziggler to run in with the Zig Zag AND HE GETS THE PIN AT 11:43!!! It’s about time!

Rating: B. Fun match but most important of all: ORTON JOBBED (ALMOST) CLEAN!!! Guys like him and Cena don’t need to win every time and having Orton put over Ziggler is great. It makes Ziggler look legit and it furthers Orton vs. Barrett. Good stuff here as was expected with this match. Ziggler could be HUGE is pushed right.

Ziggler does a handstand post match which is hilarious.

Here’s Daniel Bryan in the ring with Cole. Bryan says he earned the spot in the title match tomorrow while Cole calls Bryan a hypocrite. Bryan calls Cole the worst announcer in WWE. Cole brings up Bryan promising to cash in at Mania and then trying to do it early. We look at the video from Smackdown where Bryan tried to cash in and laughed in Cole’s face about it. Cole says he would have suspended Bryan for conduct unbecoming of a WWE Superstar. Bryan says the case guarantees him nothing so he took the opportunity he had. Tomorrow he has another opportunity in a cage with Henry.

Here’s the champ, limping but off crutches. Henry says he’s injured and isn’t completely ready to compete, which is Teddy Long’s fault. Bryan comes up the ramp with the case and says he can beat him. Bryan kicks him in the leg and says we’ll see tomorrow night. Henry is limping it off.

Zack Ryder vs. Jack Swagger

Ryder needs a clean win so that’s fine. Ryder tries to speed things up but walks into a belly to belly for two. Swagger beates him down for awhile but Ryder grabs a neckbreaker for two. Powerbomb is blocked and Ryder goes up. He jumps into a backbreaker and there’s the Vader Bomb but Swagger trips on Ryder’s body. The second attempt hits feet and the Rough Ryder ends this clean at 3:23.

Rating: C. This is the kind of win he needs: he got a clean win over a guy who isn’t going to be hurt by a loss at all. Ryder needs to win the US Title soon though, hopefully at the PPV. Still though, not much of a match, but I can’t complain as it gets the popular guy on TV and gets him a win. What more can you ask for?

Kane is still coming back with the mask.

We go back to earlier in the night and Piper’s Pit.

Here’s Santa Foley to plug Smackdown tomorrow. He gives us a poem and gets a cheap pop.

Punk swears a bit.

Raw World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Del Rio goes for the arm immediately so Punk fires off a monkey flip. Alberto takes him down again and fish hooks the mouth a bit because he’s that evil. Out to the floor where Punk hits a suicide dive to take over and we take a break. Back with Del Rio working on the arm again as you would expect him to do. Alberto goes up and hits kind of a shoulder block off the top to the arm for two.

Punk tries a top rope cross body but lands on the arm again. This is a pretty uninteresting match so far. Even Lawler points out how dead the crowd is. Backbreaker gets two for Alberto and he works on the arm again. A top rope double axe gets two. The fans want ice cream because they’re annoying. A big boot puts Punk down but the third attempt at coming off the top fails for Del Rio as he jumps into a kick for two.

The trade strikes and Punk starts his comeback with a neckbreaker for two. Punk sells the arm and hits the knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered into a Codebreaker to the arm for two. The Mexican hits a German to the American for two. GTS is countered into a DDT for two. Del Rio goes for the turnbuckle and the distraction lets Ricardo throw in a chair. Del Rio throws it to him and starts to fall but Punk throws it back first and falls himself. FREAKING BRILLIANT!!! The referee goes to DQ Del Rio but Punk rolls him up for a VERY close two. They actually take the buckle off this time and a GTS onto it ends this at 15:26.

Rating: C+. The match itself was pretty boring, but the ending to it was absolutely brilliant. There was some solid psychology here and everything worked well I think. Also, thank goodness Del Rio loses and we can hopefully move on to something else now instead of his stupid destiny nonsense. Boring match, very hot ending.

Ricardo takes a GTS post match.

Overall Rating: A-. I was DIGGING this show almost all night. Cole toned it way down tonight and it made the show a lot more bearable. They kept things fast paced tonight and instead of focusing on a single story all night, they fired a bunch of stuff at us but most of it was solid stuff. When you have a lot of stuff going on and almost all of it is good, there isn’t much complaining to be found. Great show.

Results
The Miz b. John Morrison via referee stoppage
Alicia Fox/Kelly Kelly b. Bella Twins – Legdrop to Brie Bella
Dolph Ziggler b. Randy Orton – Zig Zag
Zack Ryder b. Jack Swagger – Rough Ryder
CM Punk b. Alberto Del Rio – GTS onto the turnbuckle

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 21, 2011
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T
Guest Host: Jonah Hill

We’re past Survivor Series and it’s officially the road to Mania. The next PPV is TLC and I think that’s 4 weeks away. Rock/Cena won, which means absolutely nothing but Rock did look awesome in the ring so I guess there’s that. Also we have the title on Punk which should at least be more entertaining. There’s a guest host here tonight I think. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up. It sounds like they’re saying Woo Woo Woo during the transtional parts.

Punk opens the arena part of the show and he gets a nice pop. Good to see that he can get those when he’s not with Cena. He talks about being in first grade and having his teacher asking him what they wanted to do. Various people said stuff like a police officer, fireman, etc. He of course wanted to be a professional wrestler, and here he is: the guy that won the WWE Title in Madison Square Garden last night.

He did this on his own terms and this is all he ever wanted to do. Now he wants to be the bringer of change. Punk sits down in the ring and talks about the ice cream bars. Now he wants to get rid of Johnny Ace, which draws out the skateboard man himself. Ace says nothing of note so let’s get back to Punk talking. Punk talks about how greedy Vince is while Ace is the stereotypical middle man, like the guy from Office Space.

Punk criticizes the term WWE Universe. They’re FANS. PREACH IT BROTHER MAN!!!! Next week it’s Del Rio vs. Punk for the title. Punk makes fun of him for that so it’s Ziggler vs. Punk tonight. Punk: “That’s not a good idea or innovative. That’s stupid.” The fans want to see Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder. Ryder is busy tonight vs. Del Rio. Punk starts walking up the ramp towards Ace and some day he’s coming for Ace himself.

Last night after the PPV went off the air, the fans chanted for Ryder while Rock was in the ring. Think about that: the Rock is in the ring in MADISON SQUARE GARDEN and the fans want Zack Ryder. Rock said he was a fan. Sweet goodness man. PUSH THE GUY ALREADY!

Alberto Del Rio vs. Zack Ryder

Ryder breaks up the intro by Ricardo. I don’t get the point of the booking here. Think about it: Del Rio is #1 contender and Ryder is over like free beer. Why do we need to have this match? One has to lose and Ryder needs to get a win here but Del Rio is already on a losing streak. Why not someone like Morrison here? Instead they’ve come up with the booking already and screw the fans and what they want. And they wonder why their numbers are falling through the floor. Ryder starts his comeback but is sent into the buckle and the armbreaks officially squashes him at 2:26. I hate this company at times. I do.

Sheamus vs. Jack Swagger

Jack tries amateur stuff but Sheamus easily powers him to the floor where Swagger is frustrated. From what I’ve been told, the Twitter thing flashed static and the words “It Begins” was in there instead. Interesting. Swagger takes over with the Vader Bomb and we go to the back for a double armbar. Sheamus starts his comeback but the shoulder off the top misses. Brogue Kick is countered into the ankle lock which is kicked off and the kick ends this at 4:35.

Rating: C. Not a terrible match but it was a nice win for old pasty. Swagger is the walking definition of jobber to the stars at this point and that’s a good role for him since they’re not going to give the guy a new gimmick and the All American thing is done as done can be, so having guys beat him like this is fine.

Nash is up next.

Nash comes out and talks about MSG and how important it is here. He talks about the Curtain Call (look it up) and how HHH should have come back and it should have been them in the main event. But instead the Cerebral Assassin is gone at the hands of Nash. He says he’s the survivor of the group.

Here’s Cody, who says he’s unbeatable and he’s unrepentent. This brings out….oh give me a break it brings out Santino.

Santino Marella vs. Cody Rhodes

The Canaditalian avoids the Russian from the American but there’s the Cross Rhodes for the pin at 1:03.

Post match Cody goes after Booker, yelling about various stuff. I’ve heard this was the feud for the next few weeks so here we are. Booker gets water thrown thrown in his face and Cody walks out.

Ziggy is in the back and says he won two matches (he was eliminated but he was still on the winning team) and was the only one that did so. He’s the new face of WWE and will prove it to Punk next.

Dolph Ziggler vs. CM Punk

They head to the mat to start and there isn’t much to say so far. Ziggler beats him down for a good while and this is getting a solid amount of time given how slow they’re going. Punk tries a sleeper but Dolph takes over again. Booker calls him the Zig Zag man to get on my nerves. Ziggler keeps the advantage as we go to a break.

Back with Ziggy still in control but Punk fights back. Into the GTS attempt but it’s countered into the sleeper. Again it’s the Zig Zag Man line from Booker to get on my nerves again. That doesn’t work since Punk is a face and here’s comeback #2. He sets for the Macho elbow but Ziggy grows a brain and MOVES OUT OF THE WAY BEFORE PUNK JUMPS. Why is that so complex?

Dolph kicks his freaking head off with a slick dropkick and they go up. Punk knocks him down and there’s the elbow. It only gets two because it’s a middle of the match move. There needs to be more pins off non-finishers. GTS is countered into another throwing kind of move for a close two. Zig Zag is countered into the GTS for the pin at 16:30.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but I didn’t get into it like I did with Cena and Ziggler or Orton and Ziggler. Punk gets a good win here but he’s right: this wasn’t interesting or innovative, but it’s all we’re getting tonight because this could be interesting and not involve Rock, and since we want Punk to not have much to work with, we’re stuck with this. Decent match though.

Here’s Show to talk about Henry. Henry is coming back, Show still wants to fight him, same old same Show.

The Divas do the same stuff but it’s about WWE 12 this time. Next.

Kane return promo. The mask is included for no apparent reason.

Wade Barrett vs. Kofi Kingston

Barrett says the next thing in his sights is the world title. Barrett beats him down for awhile but as he loads up Wasteland, here’s Orton for the distraction. Wade freaks and drops Kofi. He manages to bail before the Trouble in Paradise as we go to a break. Back with Kofi in a chinlock as Randy is sitting at ringside. I like how they’re actually setting up Orton as a natural progression of a story instead of just rushing it.

Boss Man Slam (BIG one too) puts Kofi down down for two. Barrett pounds him down and hooks his bow and arrow hold. This is a pretty uninteresting match. Oh and I forgot to mention: Lawler has a bad voice due to last night so he can barely talk. Out to the floor and Kofi hits a huge dive to take over. Boom Drop hits but a corner splash misses. Kofi loads up the springboard cross body but Wade kicks the rope and Wasteland ends this clean at 11:34.

Rating: C+. Better match than I expected here and it’s awesome to see Barrett getting such a strong push. Also having Orton set up as Barrett’s next feud is a good thing and hopefully we see Barrett get the pin at the PPV, which is a feud win that he needs. Good stuff here but Kofi having a chance would have helped. Not their fault though.

Barrett announces himself as the winner to rub it in on Orton, who teases an attack but declines.

Here’s Cena for the ending segment. The people boo as you would expect. He talks about how a lot has changed in the last 24 hours (Ryder Twitter plug), including us having proof that he and Rock can team up. The fans chant Fruity Pebbles after they get a mention here. Also last night Rock proved that he’s still got it, which means Mania will be exactly what it should be.

This brings out Awesome Truth with Miz talking about how the fans didn’t want to see Cena last night. Truth says Cena is in his own world and Mania will be awful for him. Cena cuts them off and says we learned that Rock still has it and that no one cares about Awesome Truth at all. Cena tries to put some tension between Awesome Truth and neither of them are too happy with it.

Cena leaves and says they should be booing themselves. They get in each others’ faces and argue, resulting in a shove by Miz and a punch by Truth. Miz begs off and says let’s go get Cena, then jumps Truth as they head up the ramp. A Finale on the ramp (head didn’t hit) ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. I wasn’t feeling this show for the most part. The wrestling wasn’t bad but other than the main stuff, the rest was just there. It felt far more like a commercial for WWE 12 but that’s just a one night thing I believe since it comes out tomorrow. It wasn’t a bad show, but I have no idea what’s coming next and I don’t really see myself caring, which is a bad thing.

Results
Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder – Cross Armbreaker
Sheamus b. Jack Swagger – Brogue Kick
Cody Rhodes b. Santino Marella – Cross Rhodes
CM Punk b. Dolph Ziggler – GTS
Wade Barrett b. Kofi Kingston – Wasteland

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 21, 2001
Location: Compaq Center, San Jose, California
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

We have arrived. This is the show with probably the most famous and best TV tag match in company history if not wrestling history. It’s Austin/HHH vs. Benoit/Jericho in a tag title match. The rest of the show doesn’t matter but last night was Judgment Day and HHH lost the IC Title while Austin is still world champion. Let’s get to it.

Austin is here immediately to open the show. He says he’s still the champion no matter how much the people hate him. Austin represents all of them and even though he’s a fighting champion, Undertaker doesn’t get a rematch. There’s no one in the WWF that can beat him, and here’s Jericho. He asks if Austin would shut up and asks him why he sold his soul to Vince. He sold his soul and is as big a sl** as Stephanie. The challenge for later on is made (Benoit/Jericho won a match last night to determine the #1 contenders) and it’s a big brawl with the partners coming in as well.

After a break the Two Man Power Trip (which has three people in it) rant a lot with HHH being the main hot head.

Angle gets here with his medals again. He shows them off to various people because there’s a ceremony later. Oh it’s this show. Nice.

Hardcore Title: Big Show vs. Rhyno

This is a more even match than it sounds. Rhyno gets weapons out but gets beaten down quickly. The size difference here is massive. Show suplexes him on the ramp but misses a charge into the post. Here are the weapon shots as Rhyno works over the arm. Getting rid of the chokeslam makes sense. Rhyno sets for the Gore but it hits a chair. Show hits something like a Van Daminator (minus the jump) and a chokeslam onto said can gives Show the title.

Rating: C-. This could only be so good. The match lasted about 4 minutes so it’s not like this was supposed to be a classic or anything. Show shrugged off the arm work which was kind of stupid and made Rhyno look weak, but the reign wound up being pointless as Jericho would win it the next week but lose it back to Rhyno the same night. Go figure.

Angle shows the medals to someone else.

Terri comes in to hit on the APA and pours beer on her top to mess with them. They’re facing the Radicalz next. The Radicalz jump the alcoholics.

Austin can’t find Debra.

Spike and Molly talk about their families fighting. Are they Romeo and Juliet? He gives her some Dudley Glasses as a good luck gift.

Perry Saturn/Dean Malenko vs. APA

Farrooq beats on Dean to start us off. The beating they took doesn’t seem to really be hurting them that much so far. The double neckbreaker gets two on Malenko as this has been one sided so far. Suplex gets two for the future JBL. The heels have to cheat and a superkick puts Bradshaw down for two. Off to Farrooq who can’t get the Dominator on Saturn so Perry hooks a suplex.

Farrooq takes a quick beating but snaps off a powerslam to set up the double tag. Bradshaw cleans house so Terri flashes him….to no effect at all. Saturn takes a big beating with a ton of power moves, getting pinned by a pair of double powerbombs. This would be the start of the Saturn is loopy angle.

Rating: D+. This was pretty stupid. The pre-match beatdown didn’t mean anything and neither did the flashing. Saturn was getting too popular or something so they decided to give him the upcoming gimmick where he was nuts and wanted to date a mop. I can’t stand the idiocy of this company at times.

Regal is talking to someone when Austin comes up looking for Debra. Regal says she might have been attacked by Taker.

The soon to be face Edge and Christian decline to be in on Kurt’s gold medal ceremony.

European Title: Matt Hardy vs. X-Pac

Fast paced feeling out process to start with no one being able to take over so far. The fans all chant for Lita as this is still fast paced. Justin Credible distracts Matt so Pac can take over and let the cheating begin. JR and Paul argue over who “they” are (as in they call Justin the one man crime spree) as Pac/Credible crotch Matt on the post. Bronco Buster is still annoying. They slug it out and Matt blocks the X-Factor into a slingshot.

Pac grabs a backslide for two with the feet on the ropes. Other than a chinlock they’ve been going strong for like 5 minutes. Out to the floor where Jeff interferes and it turns into a big brawl. Lita tries to jump Pac which results in her getting flipped. Here’s Eddie for the save and he throws Pac into the Twist of Fate for the pin as Matt retains.

Rating: B-. For a six minute match, this was pretty awesome. They didn’t stop moving the entire time and it made the match a lot better. Pac can go when he’s in there with a smaller guy like Hardy and this is what you get out of it. As long as he’s not around big guys and overcoming the odds and making said big guy look like an idiot, this was fine.

Saturn is still out of it.

Angle is very happy looking as he comes to the ring. After a break here’s the medal celebration, complete with an Olympic style three place podium. Kurt reads from a scroll about what a hero is because San Jose is stupid. It’s pretty epic with fireworks and Heyman saying John Wayne wishes he could be the American that Angle is. Imagine how JR takes that.

This brings out Shane McMahon to I believe new music which is still awesome. I know he didn’t have it at Mania. He talks about WCW which is starting soon. Shane goes through the letters WCW, starting with W, which stands for World. We live in the world on the planet Earth. There are other planets like Mars, Jupiter, Pluto, and they all have moons. Kurt: “What are you talking about?”

Shane goes on to talk about the letter C, which stands for championship, which Kurt currently doesn’t have. It can also stand for crayon, coyote and for cookie, which is good enough for me. Kurt: “WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?” (According to Eric Bischoff, it stood for commitment but continuity didn’t mean anything in WCW). The final W is for wrestling which he says as he walks up the podium. Angle runs up and hits a big old Angle Slam and the ankle lock to leave Shane laying. This was odd as Shane had no real reason to come out here. It set up a great brawl at KOTR though so no complaints there.

Debra is in the back and is fine. Austin comes in and she says she was just gone getting coffee. She apologizes and Austin says he was worried about her. He talks about Regal thinking it might have been Taker and here is that Taker, getting right in Debra’s face. Taker says it’s not over, which it more or less was. He says it’s personal and to keep his family out of it. Austin isn’t that much shorter than Taker. Taker leaves and Austin says he didn’t fight because Debra was there. Austin came off looking like a face here while Taker looked like a heel.

Shane is escorted out. And I’m sure we won’t see him all night long right?

Dudley Boys vs. Hollies

Molly isn’t tall enough to be the Long Cool Woman in a Black Dress and I don’t know of any Bus Stops in Dudleyville. That’s all the Hollies songs I know so no more references. Big brawl to start and Hardcore is sent outside so double teaming ensues. Bubba vs. Crash officially gets us going. Off to Bob vs. D-Von as the fans want tables. Spike and Molly are near each other on the floor which distracts D-Von, giving the Hollies the advantage.

Heyman is making Jewish references which are probably pushing the limits a bit too far. Suplex gets two. Hardcore’s dropkick is still sweet to watch. Crash gets a DDT for two. Bubba gets the hot tag and there’s What’s Up to Bob. It’s Table Time and JR asks why it’s always D-Von that has to get the tables. Spike tries to convince Bubba not to use it but Crash hits a baseball slide to send it into their faces. Crash tries to use the bell but Molly breaks that up. The bell winds up in the ring and upside D-Von’s head for the pin.

Rating: C-. The Hollies were an interesting team that were actually former tag champions, having a totally forgotten two week reign back in 1999. That being said, they were interesting in that they were rarely put into storylines other than hardcore matches or against each other but they were a fairly decent tag team. Fun little match here with a nice surprise at the end, which is usually the best part of a match.

Vince gives Kurt an IC Title shot against Kane. Kurt isn’t sure if that’s a reward. Vince wanted Kurt to hurt Shane even worse.

The more famous Dudleys yell at Spike about Molly. They declare that Molly is going through a table.

Eddie comes in to check on Matt before he and Jeff team up against Edge and Christian.

HHH reminds Austin that they’re a team.

Steven Richards is at WWF New York and announces that…..well I’m not sure as Heyman yells that NO ONE CARES and to go tell someone who cares. I don’t know if it was his voice or what but that cracked me up.

Eddie Guerrero/Jeff Hardy vs. Edge/Christian

Eddie vs. Edge starts us off and this is a pretty stacked tag match. Jeff speeds things up but Christian cheats like a good heel. He comes in legally now and gets a powerslam for two. Heyman shows what an analyst is supposed to do by asking the question of who would make a better partner for Eddie: Jeff or Matt.

See, that simple question is pertinent to the match and angle at hand, gets JR into the conversation, and isn’t something that there’s a clear cut answer to. Today you would hear about how one isn’t in the Fave Five and something about how Cole is going to do this or that and how something is trending on Twitter or talking about the main event. In about 4 seconds, Heyman has probably played more attention to a match than Cole has in a year.

Anyway, Jeff comes in with a jawbreaker to put Edge down and we get a double tag. Eddie snaps off a gorgeous headscissors and the non-Canadians beat Christian down in the corner. There’s Poetry in Motion but Eddie takes a spear and everything breaks down. Eddie might have pushed Jeff out of the way for it. Lita crotches Edge on the post and Eddie gets a sunset bomb on Christian for the pin.

Rating: C. Pretty nice fast paced tag match here. Unfortunately the Eddie and Hardys angle never got any resolution as Eddie would be sent to rehab later this month and would be released in November. After next week, he wouldn’t wrestle on Raw until April of 2002. Shame too because the angle was pretty intriguing.

Intercontinental Title: Kane vs. Kurt Angle

Kane still has a bad wing. He takes over anyway with a powerslam early on. Kurt avoids a chokeslam and goes after the arm. A cross armbreaker doesn’t work that well so Kane gets Kurt on the mat and pounds away. The arm work continues for awhile until Kane fires back with a side slam and the clothesline. A big boot and another clothesline put Angle on the floor and here’s Shane for the return attack. He throws Kurt back in for a chokeslam to keep the title on Kane.

Rating: D. Pretty meh match here but it wasn’t terrible I guess. These two didn’t have a particularly good match when they wrestled at Mania either so maybe they just don’t click well. They had six minutes or so and it went by fast, but everyone was waiting on Shane to return and attack, so it was a pretty moot point anyway.

The Chrises say remember where we came from to get here.

Tag Titles: Steve Austin/HHH vs. Chris Benoit/Chris Jericho

Here we go. Austin vs. Jericho gets us going and one of the belts is laying in the ring. Austin takes over with pounding boots but Jericho snaps off a cross body for two. A top rope elbow to the head scores for Jericho and he works on Austin’s arm. HHH comes in and the Canadians take over. Benoit chops Austin HARD and then hits a snap suplex for no cover. There’s a superplex for two as HHH saves.

Jericho comes in to even things out but it lets the champions take over. Benoit is like screw that and pounds them back, hooking the Crossface on Austin. HHH comes in with a big chair shot to break it up but Benoit kicks out to a big pop. Benoit goes into the steps for no count as he kicks out before the one. Austin pounds away on him and it’s off to HHH who hooks a cheating abdominal stretch.

Make that a sleeper as Benoit is in big trouble. Benoit manages to fire off a suplex to put both guys down and an enziguri is good enough for the hot tag to Jericho….but the referee doesn’t see it. The fans don’t like that at all. Jericho goes off with Austin on the floor as HHH hits the Pedigree. There’s no referee though so Jericho goes up and takes HHH’s head off with a missile dropkick.

There’s your hot tag to Jericho and he takes on the now legal Austin and HHH at the same time. Thesz Press is countered into a spinebuster and then the Walls but HHH makes the save. That right there, that save, resulted in HHH tearing his quad off the bone and would put him out of action until January of 2002. You could see HHH’s leg just stop moving. His leg is dead weight now.

HHH is like screw this potentially career ending injury and goes to set up the announce table. HHH loads up the Pedigree but Jericho counters into the Walls on the table, and remember that HHH has a torn muscle. FREAKING OW MAN!!! Benoit hits the swan dive on Austin but there’s no referee. Stunner to Benoit gets two as Jericho pulls the referee out. Lionsault gets knees and HHH finds the sledgehammer from somewhere. The second Lionsault hits but the hammer hits Austin and Jericho gets the pin and the titles as the place erupts!

Rating: A+. WOW this match holds up really well. After Jericho gets that hot tag, this is full speed ahead the rest of the way. The energy in this is great as they did everything they could to keep the Canadians down but in the end, HHH messes up to end it. Notice one very important thing here: Jericho had Austin (presumably) beat with the Lionsault, so it’s not like they got dominated the entire time and won on a mistake by the other team. That’s huge and it makes Benoit/Jericho look far stronger as the new champions.

Overall Rating: A. This is a great show overall with some very fun stuff throughout the night. Everything clicks and for a TV show, that’s almost unheard of. When you get a classic main event, you’re guaranteed a good show but a great show surrounding it makes this one of the best Raws I can remember in a very long time. Check this show out as it’s awesome stuff.

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 18, 1998
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 11,528
Commentators: Jim Ross, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re getting closer to Over the Edge which is on the 31st of May. Until then, it’s more Austin vs. Vince craziness. Tonight it’s going to be the Rattlesnake vs. the Stooges in what I’m sure will be an athletically based contest. Val Venis finally debuts tonight and we’ll probably build up a lot more for the PPV as well. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week where Vince stacked the deck against Austin which sets up the awesome match at the PPV.

Vince and the Stooges open us up. According to Vince, Austin has a concussion which JR disputes. If Austin tries anything, he’ll get hurt even worse. For Austin’s protection, he’s barred from the arena tonight. We see a video of Austin arriving and a guy stopping him. The guy sounds scared to death. Austin says he’s going to have some beers and the guy has five minutes to decide about the easy way or the hard way.

Here’s Dude who says that as Austin’s title reign is dying, the Dude is becoming stronger. Insert your own Lebowski joke here. That movie had already come out so I wonder if that’s why Vince picked the name Dude. I can’t imagine Vince has seen that movie to this day so we’ll go with no there. Dude says all of their dreams will come true on the 31st.

Vince calls out Dustin Runnels, (Goldust) and yells at him for blaming Vince for all of his problems. Vince says he gave Dustin Goldust and Dustin threw it away. Dude vs. Dustin (who recently had knee surgery) is made and the #1 contender spot is up for grabs. If Dustin loses, he has to work for free for thirty days. Dustin says ok and clocks Dude, getting him a 3-1 beating.

Jerry Lawler gets here with someone under a sheet. He tells whoever it is to mingle but the person can’t see. Jerry says it’s a security precaution and the security guard from earlier says it’s ok.

Scorpio vs. Val Venis

This is Val’s debut. The first thing said about Venis is from Cole: “Here he comes!” These jokes write themselves. Nothing special to start us off as they trade wristlocks. Val takes over with some clotheslines and a powerslam. Scorpio comes back with a sunset flip and what we would call Trouble in Paradise. Val goes up for a middle rope splash but jumps (mostly) into a boot. Trouble in Paradise hits again and the Tumbleweed gets two. The Canadian (Val) gets a German on the American for two. Scorpio slams him but the moonsault misses, setting up the Money Shot to end this.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t that good as it ran too long for a debut. Venis shows he’s resilient but he needed more than that in his debut match. The top rope splash was always cool to see, but Val was in too much trouble here for his debut. Also he looked a little out of sync in there and the match dragged about two minutes too long. Not horrible, but it’s a debut so you have to cut him some slack.

Austin goes up to the security guard again and says the guy has picked the hard way. Pain ensues. Then we get the kind of thing that makes characters great. Austin grabs the guy’s walkie talkie and says that we have a situation here and that he’s coming for Vince. Little things like those made Austin unique because we get a bit of comedy in there with it, just to add his own signature to it. Little things like that add up and helped make Austin the legend that he is.

Here’s Austin in the arena and he says he’s getting a little madder about all of the strings Vince is pulling every day. He calls out Vince and the Stooges to settle this right now. Either get out here or he’ll start breaking expensive stuff. Austin wants to fight them all and Vince panics. Austin wants a street fight and Patterson says sure because Austin said he sucks, which he absolutely does not! Oh there are a million jokes there. Briscoe wants in on this too. Vince says Austin will get two of the three, but he won’t say which two. Is this supposed to be a secret?

Edge is coming.

The make-up lady is trying to help the person under King’s sheet. I think I know who it is.

Here’s Sable who asks Marc Mero to come out here. She offers him an amicable split and Mero chuckles. He has a contract that she signed and says she’s his property.

Marc Mero vs. Terry Funk

Mero jumps him coming in and they start in a brawl on the floor. Yeah brawl with Terry Funk. This COULDN’T go bad. Back in and Terry takes over with a piledriver for two. Mero pounds away as JR makes some not very veiled references to WCW and their Seniors’ Tour. Funk shoves the referee and suplexes Mero but with the referee down Marc hits him low for two. TKO puts Funk down but Sable is on the apron. Terry no sells the TKO and hits a DDT for the pin.

Rating: C. Eh not bad but the point here was advancing Sable vs. Mero which they did here. This is what wrestling doesn’t have today: basic storylines like this with a match being thrown out there where this isn’t a shocking upset. Both of these guys have their own thing going on and we didn’t have to have a big video about it. We were just told about it and I find that it works better that way.

Cops are here for Austin.

Legion of Doom vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

Gah I hate this feud. No Sunny here who I think was gone for good now. It’s Chainz/Skull here so I don’t have to play guess which twin. Skull vs. Hawk to start. I don’t like Hawk having hair as it gets confusing. The DOA controls early on but Hawk hits a facejam on Skull to take over and he follows it with….my goodness an enziguri. Well not really as that means head kick and this was in the back but still, points for trying.

Off to Animal and everything breaks down. Animal powerbombs Skull for one as this is falling apart quickly. Hawk hits a middle rope splash for two as the tagging is being forgotten. 8-Ball comes in through the crowd and rolls Animal up for the surprise pin. They would have a regular tag at the PPV. This was short and not very good, which I think was intentional to show that the LOD were getting up there in years and couldn’t hang with these younger guys.

LOD demands a 6-man next week. That would be Droz’s debut.

Steve Austin will be on Celebrity Deathmatch.

Paul Bearer and Kane were at a medical facility earlier for a DNA test. Kane in street clothes with a hood over his head is a different look for him.

Here’s King with his bodyguard. And it’s Al Snow. I was right earlier.

Dude Love vs. Dustin Rhodes

30 days pay vs. #1 contendership here. Dustin hammers away and this is just Dustin Rhodes. He has a big FU painted on his shirt while Love was in a sportscoat. Out to the floor and Dustin goes into the steps. Austin is watching in the back. Dustin hits the bulldog to booing but walks into the Mandible Claw to end this. This was nothing.

The cops arrest Austin. After a break Vince comes in to run his mouth and provoke Austin some more.

Headbangers vs. Kai En Tai

This is supposed to be 2-2 but it’s a 3-2 attack in the aisle. The team is Dick Togo and Men’s Teioh. We get down to a regular match as Snow is in the audience now, demanding his meeting with Vince. The heels cheat a lot because that’s what heels do. Back in the ring Teioh hits Thrasher low and Togo hits what we would call a Whisper in the Wind to put Thrasher down again.

Thrasher finally blocks a superplex or a super rana to take over. And never mind that as Teioh interferes to knock him off the top. The heels cheat even more as Funaki comes in to beat on Mosh. Bradshaw and Taka come in for the save from the big beatdown and the match is thrown out.

Rating: D+. Eh whatever here. Kai En Tai wouldn’t go anywhere until Taka turned heel and joined them but it’s not like this ever amounted to anything. Pretty weak match overall and the ending didn’t help as that’s how the vast majority of these matches ended: in a relatively predictable DQ.

Austin is put into the police car.

More of Bearer and Kane getting their DNA test.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Owen Hart/Rocky Maivia

DX does their schtick before the match. It’s a big brawl once the Nation gets here with no one in the ring at all. After a break we’re finally ready to go with Rock vs. Road Dogg. Billy protests something and Rock kicks Roadie low. There’s the People’s Elbow which has a name now. We hear about how great Owen is and now it’s time for Billy to get beaten up. Back to Roadie after about 2 seconds as Rock hits a Samoan Drop and Owen adds a top rope elbow for no cover.

Instead of trying for the pin, he wants to bite Dogg’s ear. Well sure why not. Rock Bottom gets two and everything breaks down. Rock is yelling at Chyna when Faarooq runs down and plants him with a piledriver. Road Dogg reaches over to steal a pin and get what would be the biggest fall of his career if he knew what was coming.

Rating: C-. Eh it set up the PPV match with Farrooq vs. Rock and continued the summer long feud between the two groups. The match wasn’t the point here and there’s nothing wrong with that in this case. It was going to set up Rock vs. HHH at the end of the summer and this is one of those side steps to get us there.

The cops haven’t taken Austin away yet. After a break the cops let Austin go after he apologizes to the guard.

Kevin Kelly is in the ring with a doctor who says Paul is Kane’s father. There go the lights and here’s Kane. Bearer calls Taker’s mother a two bit w**** and Taker is there in about 4 seconds. Kane takes a chokeslam but Taker goes after Bearer too much and Kane beats him down. Vader, Kane’s opponent on Sunday, comes down to beat on Kane as Taker chases Bearer off. Vader stands tall as Kane bails.

Gerald Brisco/Pat Patterson vs. Steve Austin

Commissioner Slaughter is guest referee. He pops Austin on the way in and it’s a beatdown. This is a street fight also. Patterson hits him with a foreign object of some kind for two and Austin is all fired up. Stunners for the Stooges as well as Slaughter so I think we’ll say this is thrown out. Dude runs out and gets a beating also. A “fan” jumps the railing and pops Austin with a chair but it’s Vince in an Austin mask. Austin is left on the floor to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The show was energetic enough and the one major angle was well pushed, but it was the main focus of the show which gets a little tiring. This is more of a miss than a hit which is rare in these days. We need to get to the PPV soon because the story and scenario is all set up. Not a terrible show but it was kind of hard to get through.

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 14, 2011
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s another three hour show tonight as Rock returns again. For a guy that vowed to never leave he sure has a lot of welcome back shows. Anyway, other than that it’s the go home show for Survivor Series so expect a lot of Rock/Cena stuff tonight. Also we should finally get the Cole Challenge for JR. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.

Jerry does the talking to start which is different. Here’s Cole in the ring for the Michael Cole Challenge. There are two things in the ring covered by black covers. Cole calls out JR and here he comes. There are three challenges and if JR wins all three, Cole quits and JR gets the job back as the Voice of Raw. The first blanket is removed and it’s an arm wrestling contest. We get a referee out here and JR won’t even take off his jacket. Cole does his warmups to waste time and JR beats him in all of half a second. I mean it’s go then we’re done. Cole says he gave up due to JR’s barbecue breath.

The crowd gets to vote on the winner of the next competition: a dance off. Cole dances while holding a red scarf and looks like he’s having a seizure. JR actually says it’s on and asks the fans to chlap for him. JR dances and there’s a meme in there somewhere. JR REALLY loves this business to go through this. The fans of course vote for JR and it’s 2-0.

Up third is who weighs less. The fans go quiet save for a few yells. After turning the scales on wrong, Cole weighs about 200lbs. JR about 240 and Cole wins. He declares himself the winner and that brings out….Punk? Good reaction for him too. The arm wrestling table and the scale are gone and Punk says this is a colossal waste of time because there was no way JR could win. “Except for JR dancing. That was awesome.”

Punk says that Cole’s fifteen minutes of fame are up because Punk wants him gone. Between Johnny Funkman Ace and Alberto and Cole, this show is awful. With three hours, it already feels like Cole has been out here for six. CM wants this to be fun and he’ll do that when he’s champion. It doesn’t matter what it takes to make the show as good as it can be. This brings out Ace. Punk: “Speaking of untalented.”

Ace says that the fans on his Twitter wanted to see the competition. Punk: “Oh yeah? Well screw you and your 38,000 Twitter followers.” Ace makes Punk/Show vs. Henry/Del Rio. Cole is all smug and demands an apology. Punk does say he’s sorry, but Cole is screaming due to being in the Anaconda Vice.

Striker is in the back and a huge limo pulls up. MICK FOLEY IS BACK!

Sin Cara/Kofi Kingston vs. Cody Rhodes/Hunico

Christian is still listed in the graphic for the Survivor Series match. JR has taken over on commentary and Cody has new music. He also has no mask and is smiling now. It’s the same song but a new version of it. Cody says in a quick interview that Cody liberated him. Hunico vs. Cara starts us off and Hunico takes some kicks. Cara speeds thins up and it’s off to Kofi.

A dropkick puts Cody on the floor and the faces hit a pair of dives (the camera misses Cara’s, a rare mistake in WWE production values) and we take a break. Back with Cody holding a chinlock on Cara and then a release suplex. Off to Hunico who hits a slingshot tope and then a camel clutch.

Cara tries a rana but can’t quite get it over. He does manage a head scissors to send Cody down. There’s the tag to Kofi who gets a nice reaction. The springboard cross body gets two, broken up by Hunico. A big spinning dive takes out Hunico but Trouble in Paradises misses, allowing the maskless Cody to take out Kofi with Cross Rhodes for the pin at 8:05.

Rating: C. This was just ok. It was a TV tag match and that’s really all it needed to be. Kofi is in a total holding pattern until Bourne gets back and putting him in a match like this is the right idea since it allows Kofi to do nothing of note until Bourne gets back without them having to drop the titles. Not much of a match and no one is hurt by it one way or another.

Rock is here.

Santino is playing WWE 12 in the back when Ryder comes up (PoP. Not good enough for three capitals), asking him to sign Ryder’s petition. They get in a Rock vs. Cena argument and they agree Awesome Truth will lose Sunday. This appears to be more of a commercial for all things Ryder and WWE 12.

Here’s Vickie to yell a lot. She cuts JR off on his product plugs too. Vickie has bad news: earlier today, WWE.com reported that Christian is out of the Survivor Series match which is legit due to an ankle injury. She blames Teddy for the injury and Dolph is replacing him. Actually Dolph comes out and cuts her off, saying he’s the replacement on Team Barrett. It should be Team Ziggler though because he’s the one with the talent. He has Mason Ryan tonight.

Mason Ryan vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ace comes out and throws Ross off commentary as Cole is ok again. Otunga plans to sue Punk. Cole of course is incapable of shutting up so the match isn’t going to get much attention. Ryan uses a bunch of power stuff and Vickie slaps Ryan for the DQ at 1:08. Next.

Morrison runs out and throws Ziggler back in for a full nelson slam.

Foley runs into Ryder in the back and Ryder asks for a signature on the petition. Foley does a fist pump and Woo Woo Woo. Awesome.

Here’s Foley for the first time in like three years. He says he’s back here where he belongs and it’s to talk about serious business. This Sunday there will be a team that will be together once and then never again. Foley hopes it’ll be again in the form of the Rock and Cena Connection. He talks about how the fans boo Cena and while that’s their right, he wishes the fans would view Cena as one of the greatest ever.

Foley brings out Cena in his hometown. Cena says he appreciates Mick’s efforts, but he and Rock aren’t going to be friends. Cena requested him to be his partner because Rock is electrifying, not because they’re friends. Foley says they know each other a bit and their relationship is based on mutual respect. Foley talks about writing Cena a hand written letter as he respects Cena for treating everyone equally.

However when it comes to Twitter, Foley got in some trouble because he said everyone should respect Cena a bit more for all of his great matches. Preach it Foley. Foley has a hybrid Cena/Rock shirt and he’s going to bring them together, because John Cena…..THIS IS YOUR LIFE!

Cena isn’t sure what to do here but Foley says roll the emotional video tribute! We get a video on baby Cena with some sappy song to it. We also see teenage Cena and his rise through WWE. This is bizarre and once it’s done, Cena isn’t sure what to think again. He asks about the song which sounded like a theme song from a Care Bears movie. The first person Foley brings out is his former little league coach.

The coach tells a story about a game Cena was in where he was the last hitter up and he struck out looking to end the game. The coach said that it was a learning experience but Cena cried his eyes out that day. Foley: “Everybody strikes out once in awhile.” Cena: “You’re striking out with this right now.” Up next is Bull freaking Buchanan. They really brought him out of mothballs for this?

We get a video of Cena rapping from 2003. Cena is either not expecting this stuff or he’s a better actor than he’s credited for. Buchanan talks about how great Cena’s career has been. His life after the team split hasn’t gone so well. He was fired, his wife left him, he lost his money, and his dog bit him and gave him rabies to end his career. Buchanan blames Cena for ruining his life and storms off. Cena: “Finally something worse than the Shockmaster.”

Foley has one more person left: Cena’s dad. This can’t go bad can it? Cena’s dad goes off on the fans for chanting Cena sucks. Cena Jr. looks like he wants to go jump in front of a bus. Dad says the fans suck, not Cena. Children love him. So what? The son begs his dad to stop and says this is awful. Cena’s dad leaves and Cena says that wasn’t his life. This is his life here in the ring. He thanks Foley for trying but this was up there with the Gobbledygooker. Foley says he has one thing left. It’s some chick but instead here’s Rocky.

Rock hits the ring, Rock Bottoms Foley and leaves. That was GREAT. I love Foley but that was hilarious.

Sheamus vs. Jack Swagger

Sheamus is now introduced as the Great White. They’re going to get that over as a nickname by force if need be. Power match to start and Swagger takes him to the mat pretty easily. Sheamus clotheslines him to the floor and we take a break. Back with Sheamus hammering the forearms into the chest but Swagger takes out the knee to take over. Suplex gets two. Sheamus comes back and pounds away on him, hitting a powerslam for two. High Cross is countered and the Vader Bomb hits the back of Sheamus. Ankle lock goes on but Sheamus kicks him to the floor. Irish Curse and Brogue Kick end this at 8:55.

Rating: C. Not a horrible power brawl here as Sheamus beats someone he should beat. Swagger is dying for a new gimmick of some sort but they’ll never give him one because that’s the gimmick they’ve given him and it’s his fault that it isn’t working anymore. Not bad, but nothing to see overall here.

Ryder tries to get signatures from the Bellas who reluctantly sign. They go to see Alberto and he’s having a party when he wins. Ryder barges in and says the girls should party with him on Long Island. Everyone leaves Ryder there.

Kelly Kelly vs. Natalya

After a look behind the scenes of Kelly’s Maxim photoshoot, Kelly is in a Patriots jersey and there’s a Stinkface very quickly. Sharpshooter is countered into a small package for the pin at 52 seconds.

Ace talks on the phone with someone and says they’ll do it next week. It’s Brodus Clay who will be debuting next week. Great, more bait and switch. Alberto and Ricardo come in and Ace says Punk could be trouble if he wins the title.

We run down the Survivor Series card.

Awesome Truth says nothing as Striker asks them questions about the PPV on Sunday.

Punk is headed to the ring for the tag match but Alberto jumps him and beats him down.

Alberto Del Rio/Mark Henry vs. Big Show/CM Punk

Punk is holding his arm and chases Del Rio around a bit pre match. Del Rio vs. Big Show starts us off and Show has his t-shirt on still. After Show destroys him for a bit it’s off to Punk who is out after about 15 seconds. Time for the big showdown with the ring breakers. Henry shoves him away and Show shoves Henry away. Show goes for a slam but Henry falls on him instead for two.

Back to Del Rio who stomps away and then it’s Henry again. Del Rio and Punk are barely in this at all. Show fights up from his knees and Henry is staggered. Henry runs from the right hand and Del Rio isn’t happy. They argue as we go to a break. Back with Mark standing on Punk’s chest. We hear a tweet from Ace who praises Cole for toughing it out. Back to Alberto who works on the arm as Cole runs down the Anaconda Vice.

Punk fights back with a neckbreaker and Henry takes a kick to the head. Show comes in for a superkick to Henry but Punk springboards into the Slam. Show runs Henry down but is sent into the post. Del Rio steals the pin on Punk at 12:08 total. He needed to get a pin over him to give him some momentum.

Rating: D+. I couldn’t get into this at all. I like the whole two matches being advanced in the span of one match but the match dragged a lot. I think part of it is no one cares about Del Rio because there’s zero development to his character. He’s the same guy he was when he debuted over a year ago and nothing has changed in him. That’s not good.

Del Rio puts on the armbreaker post match. He remembers that Punk’s left arm was hurt so he switches sides. Well at least he’s thinking. Big Show makes the save.

Here’s Santino who talks about Del Rio winning the Rumble by last eliminating him. He talks about Boston a bit and sucks up to the fans. Santino is going to put his career back on track now, and that brings out Kevin Nash. Nash says he’s a big fan of Santino and asks to see the Trombone. If you can’t see what comes next, stop reading this and go watch some old matches.

With Santino out cold, he talks about the Rumble where he got the biggest ovation of the night. He talks about HHH not hiring him after that reaction and points out that he’s here and HHH isn’t. There’s a Jackknife to Marella and Nash leaves.

Jonah Hill is the guest host next week.

Here’s a video on WWE 12.

Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton

Barrett’s SS team comes out with him. This is a rematch from Smackdown where Barrett got a huge upset via a thumb to the eye. Barrett says he’s the future and all that jazz. Randy has his team with him as well. Gee think there’s going to be a brawl? The bell is after a break. Orton takes Barrett down quickly and hits a suplex and knee drop for one. Boss Man Slam gets two and control for Wade. Barrett’s hair is all messed up again like it was on Friday. A long chinlock eats up some time until Orton gets out and hits the elevated DDT. And everything breaks down for the DQ at 3:40.

Rating: D+. It’s not like this meant anything but it was long enough to rate. The ending was as obvious as you could ask for as the guys down there ensured the double DQ for the brawl. Also they had to keep Barrett looking strong as if he beats Barrett here, the only real option for beating Orton goes away. Weak match, but it had to be.

Hunico gets destroyed post match.

It’s 10:45 so here’s Rock to close the show. He says at 3:15 AM this morning he woke up and by 3:30 he was eating breakfast (“Not a Fruity Pebble in sight!”). He goes through his daily schedule and says he was in New Orleans filming G.I. Joe 2 earlier today. At 6:45 he landed in Boston and had a security guard talking about….something. Rock talks about wanting to have dinner on the North End but instead he came here because he wanted to say that FINALLY, the Rock has come back to Boston.

In six days he’s wrestling again, but that’s not right now. That’s why he Rock Bottomed Foley: the segment earlier was hot garbage and he had to do something about it. Rock plugs Twitter and says that if he says something, it’ll knock off the Kardashians, Bigfoot and anything else. He wants Awesome Truth right NOW.

Here they come and they imply Rock isn’t going to do anything to them tonight. The truth is that whenever they’re on the show, Raw gets……..AWESOME. They threaten Rock and it’s a staredown. Scratch that as they’re leaving and here’s Cena. He says that Rock is Team Bring It, but the only thing he’s brought for seven years are messages via satellite. The crowd is right: ooooooh!

Rock says you’ll have to excuse Cena because he’s not used to having an adult support him. Rock makes more juvenile jokes and Cena talks about Survivor Series. If Rock’s ego gets in the way of the team, Cena slaps Rocky will be trending.

Miz says he’s tired of this because he’s tired of Awesome Truth being an afterthought. Last time that happened, Miz won in the main event of Wrestlemania. This Sunday will never be forgotten because of the beating Rock and Cena will get. Little Johnny and Little Rocky can talk all they want and the Little Jimmys can enjoy it. The fight is on and Rock punches Truth out. He loads up the Rock Bottom and Truth gets got. AA looks to put Miz down but Rock pulls him off and into a Rock Bottom. Rock leaves and Cena isn’t happy at all.

Overall Rating: B-. The first half is great but once Ace gets there, this goes downhill fast. Alberto is just so freaking uninteresting because there’s nothing to his character at all. He’s rich and he speaks Spanish. What else do we have to go on with him? Oh he has a lackey. That’s it. That right there is Alberto Del Rio. Punk needs to take the title from him so we can have an interesting champion for a change. Anyway, the rest of the show was good but the Ace/Del Rio stuff is just horrible.

Results
Hunico/Cody Rhodes b. Kofi Kingston/Sin Cara – Cross Rhodes to Kingston
Mason Ryan b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Vickie Guerero interfered
Sheamus b. Jack Swagger – Brogue Kick
Kelly Kelly b. Natalya – Small Package
Mark Henry/Alberto Del Rio b. CM Punk/Big Show – Del Rio pinned Punk after a World’s Strongest Slam
Randy Orton b. Wade Barrett via DQ when Cody Rhodes interfered

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall