Smackdown
Date: May 12, 2016
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler

It’s kind of hard to say what to expect around here as the show has been bouncing back and forth between focusing on the Intercontinental Title feud and then the World Title situation. The former tends to be the more interesting and it should be a fun show tonight with all four people being thrown together in a tag match. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Dean Ambrose to get things going. Lawler thinks Jericho should press charges against Dean for destroying the jacket. Well, uh, YEAH probably but that’s the kind of thing that doesn’t happen in wrestling. Dean thinks they’re even now because Jericho smashed Mitch over the back of his head to try and take away everything he has. This ring is all that he’s got and as long as his heart is beating, no one is going to take it away. Now the question is what can Dean take away from Jericho and the first thing that comes to his mind is Jericho’s ego.

After Dean gets done with him, Jericho isn’t even going to be sure if wrestling is for him anymore. The lights go out and Jericho’s music comes on, only to have Jericho appear behind Dean and lay him out. That’s not it though as he pulls out a straitjacket to tie Dean down. Ambrose wakes up as Jericho shouts that Dean needs to get crazy while beating him in the head. A Codebreaker stops Dean’s comeback and a second one FINALLY has referees out here to break it up. Jericho does his Gift of Jericho pose on the announcers’ table.

Rusev vs. Sin Cara

Kalisto is on commentary and says helping Cara on Monday was just being a team. Rusev drops him with an early clothesline and stomps away as Kalisto stumbles over his battle plan for the pay per view. A kick to the chest puts Cara down again and we hear about Steph Curry for no good reason.

In your random insult of the week, Rusev has dubbed Kalisto the smelly boy who hides behind a mask. Cara starts kicking at the leg and scores with some right hands, followed by a top rope flip attack. As this is going on, Lana throws water on Kalisto for a distraction so Rusev can kick him in the head. Back in and the superkick sets up the Accolade to make Cara tap at 3:09.

Rating: D. SO WHAT WAS THE POINT OF MONDAY??? If you’re just going to have Rusev squash Cara like he always should, why have him lose in the first place? As usual it comes off like WWE has no idea what they’re doing from one show to another and just does stuff for the sake of doing it instead of with any kind of logical reasoning or planning behind it.

We look at Dana Brooke debuting and helping beat down Becky Lynch on Monday.

Emma introduces Dana, who is ready to destroy Becky tonight. People forget that Emma used to be on top of the NXT women’s division but Dana has never forgotten and knows what Emma can do. This needed more patting on the head.

Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

Lynch forearms her to start and pats Dana on the head, only to be pulled down by the hair. Dana stomps her on the mat and cranks on an arm and leg at the same time. Becky starts her comeback with a clothesline and a leg lariat but Dana sends her throat first into the ropes so Emma can poke her in the eye. Dana grabs a jackknife cover for the pin at 2:52. This was really awkward, which I’m sure has nothing to do with Dana debuting in September 2014 and being injured for months but still being called up to the main roster anyway.

Video on the end of Monday’s six man tag and the post match showdown between Reigns and Styles.

AJ gives Anderson and Gallows a pep talk for tonight but says he’s banned from ringside. They seem to be officially going with The Club.

Here’s New Day for their weekly chat. Big E. nearly swears about what happened on Monday, which Woods says was the Vaudevillians Kanye Westing them. By that he doesn’t mean marrying someone who has a big……I think you get the idea. Actually Woods means getting involved in something that was none of his business. They’re stuck in the 1830s and at Extreme Rules they’ll be knocked into the DeLorean and sent back to the future. Cue the Vaudevillians to sing about how they’ll win the titles a week from Sunday. Soon the sun will set on the New Day and the night belongs to the Vaudevillians.

Aiden English vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi dropkicks him at the bell and stomps the heck out of him in the corner. English gets sent outside but catches a sliding Kofi and sends him face first into the post to take over. Big E. holds up the cereal to bring Kofi back to life (needs more Lion King), which actually seems to work as Kofi kicks English in the face and gets two off a high cross body. A top rope splash to the back gets two but everyone else gets ejected. Things settle down and Kofi grabs a sunset flip, only to have English drop down and put his hand on the ropes for the big upset at 3:52.

Rating: C. English is better in the ring than he’s given credit for but it’s pretty difficult to have a bad match against someone like Kofi Kingston. I still don’t buy the Vaudevillians as taking the titles away from New Day as Anderson/Gallows should have that spot locked up but at least the build has been set up very well.

Reigns is also banned from ringside but he’s ready to come out and deal with Styles if necessary.

Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson vs. Usos

Reigns and Styles are banned from ringside. Karl and Jey get things going with Jey in control before it’s off to Jimmy for a running forearm. It’s Gallows pulling Jimmy down by the hair and coming in for a slam. Anderson pounds away in the corner even more as Ranallo mentions Karl teaming with Giant Bernard, who Lawler says he hasn’t heard from in a long time.

Anderson finally misses an elbow and it’s off to Jey as things speed up. There’s a powerslam to Karl but Gallows kicks Jey in the face and we take a break. Back with Anderson dropping a knee for two before it’s back to Gallows for a chinlock. With that going nowhere, Gallows opts to just punch Jey in the corner. A superkick gets Jey out of trouble and the diving tag brings in Jimmy for the real house cleaning. Another superkick drops Anderson and sets up the Superfly Splash, only to have Gallows pull Jimmy to the floor. Gallows throws him over the announcers’ table and that’s a DQ at 11:39.

Rating: C-. The match was fine (albeit a bit slow paced) but the problem here is I’m sick of seeing them fight. This is the sixth time in three weeks that they’ve been in the same match. They’re not bad or anything but it’s the same problem WWE has so often: eventually people get sick of them and it’s time for something fresh. Have the Hype Bros comes up from NXT get squashed by Anderson and Gotch or put the Social Outcasts against the Usos or something but stop just doing the same thing and then expecting us to care when you put this on pay per view (which you know they will).

The beating continues post match as Anderson kicks Jey in the face and the twins are beaten down with a chair. You know, the match is over so there’s nothing keeping Reigns from coming out for the save.

R-Truth waters his selfie stick and gets his phone wet.

Here’s our first Life Lesson With Coach Backlund. Bob asks Darren what time his watch says. Darren pulls out his phone to check the time but Backlund thinks he’s making a phone call. His advice is to not call the operator and waste her time about the time. Young says no one wears watches anymore and he has everything on his desktop on his smart phone. Backlund: “I don’t care if your phone is Einstein!” He wants the mail in a mailbox, a calendar on a wall and the desktop on top of a desk. Darren is told to do 200 squats and that’s just fine with him. Again they weren’t even in the same room, which makes this even better.

On a related sidenote: since when did wearing a watch become something so horrible? Yeah you can check your phone, or you can flick your eyes over to your wrist and see what time it is. You might even be able to do that without then needing to check 14 things on your phone and getting distracted by something. Since when did that become some arcane way of thinking?

Goldango vs. Gorgeous Truth

Breeze and Fandango open things up but it’s off to Goldust and Truth less than thirty seconds in. Neither of them want to fight though so Truth tags Breeze back in, only to have Tyler knock Truth off the apron. Fandango turns on Goldust as well and Breeze pins Goldust (off a single clothesline, the only move Goldust took all match) for the pin at 1:39.

The beatdown is on and Goldust tries to cover Truth. That’s a nice gesture but if I’m Truth, I’d try to find a partner who can survive a clothesline.

Greetings From Puerto Rico. Their new name is the Shining Stars.

We look at Ric Flair being escorted out of the building in the way too complicated segment on Monday.

Charlotte calls that a travesty because Ric Flair deserves better treatment than that. Ric guarantees that Charlotte will retain the title at Extreme Rules but Charlotte looks unsure. To recap, the idea here is that Charlotte is in trouble without Flair and Ric is the one who is confident. In other words: Flair looks good and Charlotte looks almost inept. As usual, advantage Flair.

Cesaro/Sami Zayn vs. The Miz/Kevin Owens

This should be good. During Miz’s entrance, Owens jumps on commentary to say he’s allowing Miz one last chance to be a good partner before he takes the title at Extreme Rules. Miz and Cesaro get things going with the latter grabbing a headlock. A backbreaker gets two on Miz so Owens shouts about how he can do better. That’s fine with Miz who brings Owens in, followed by Sami tagging himself in as well.

Zayn hammers away in the corner and Lawler correctly says the referee should be admonishing Sami for the punches. Miz comes in and bails to the floor but Owens won’t let him leave. The good guys hit some dives to take the villains down and we take a break. Back with Sami slamming Miz and low bridging him out to the floor. Owens gets in a cheap shot though and it’s time for Sami to be in trouble. A hard kick to the back sets up a camel clutch from Miz.

Owens to Byron: “YOU BETTER PRAISE ME!” The Reality Check gets two for Miz but Sami comes back with one of those clotheslines to drop the champ. There’s the Blue Thunder Bomb (whose name confuses Lawler) to finally allow the tag off to Cesaro. Owens gets to eat some uppercuts and Cesaro runs to the floor for the uppercut against the barricade on Miz. The high cross body gets two on Owens but Sami’s Helluva Kick hits Cesaro by mistake. Owens adds the frog splash for the pin on Cesaro at 12:45.

Rating: C+. Standard Smackdown main event tag with a nice bonus of having Sami and Cesaro screw up to add some tension there. They’re actually pulling off the four way feud here as everyone wants to beat everyone else but it’s all about the title (mostly) instead of personal feelings. Good match here though and the kind of thing you would expect on Smackdown.

Sami takes the Pop Up Powerbomb but Miz gives Owens the Skull Crushing Finale to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is what you come to know and expect from Smackdown with the watchable wrestling and meaningless storyline development as almost none of this will be brought up on Raw. You really have to take this show on a week to week basis as it really is just about whether or not the show happens to be good that particular week. Nothing much to see here though and that’s Smackdown in a nutshell.

Results

Rusev b. Sin Cara – Accolade

Dana Brooke b. Becky Lynch – Jackknife rollup

Aiden English b. Kofi Kingston – Rollup while grabbing the rope

Usos b. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows via DQ when Gallows threw Jimmy over the table

Gorgeous Truth b. Goldango – Breeze pinned Goldust after a clothesline from Fandango

Miz/Kevin Owens b. Cesaro/Sami Zayn – Frog splash to Cesaro

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: May 5, 2016
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

We’ve hit the ground running on the way to Extreme Rules with a fairly action packed Raw earlier this week. The big story continues to be AJ Styles vs. Roman Reigns but now we also have the Usos and Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows much more closely involved. It should be interesting to see what they can throw in here before the pay per view in two and a half weeks. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with the Highlight Reel but first we get a recap of the Ambrose Asylum being canceled and the ensuing brawl. Ranallo: “Payback is a Mitch!” Jericho brags about injuring Dean Ambrose and keeping him off the show tonight. That’s about it for Dean though as here’s Jericho’s guest: Sami Zayn.

Before anything is said, we look at a clip of Cesaro vs. Owens on Monday with Sami and Miz getting involved and likely setting up a fourway for the title. Jericho says Sami isn’t a decent human being for holding up the Intercontinental Title but Sami thinks the scarf makes Jericho look stupid. Sami certainly wasn’t trying to steal the title but here are Miz and Maryse to interrupt.

This is Miz’s Intercontinental Title so Sami better not lay a finger on her again, which is exactly what Sami does again. Jericho says he would freak out if anyone touched his $15,000 jacket like that. Sami: “You paid $15,000 to look like a walking Christmas tree?” That’s enough for Jericho who walks out so Miz threatens Zayn for trying to go after the biggest fish in WWE. Sami touches the title again and says he wants to go for a swim. Zayn wants to go right now but Miz bails to the floor.

Sami Zayn vs. The Miz

Non-title with the bell ringing after a break. Feeling out process to start as they fight over wristlocks and armbars. Sami grinds him down with a headlock. Back up and Sami gets in one of those kind of awkward looking clotheslines of his to send Miz to the floor. A moonsault off the barricade drops Miz again but here’s Kevin Owens for a distraction.

We take a break and come back with Owens on commentary and Miz dropping a top rope axhandle for no cover. Owens: “You should be very proud of yourself Miz. You jumped up to the top rope, jumped off the top and hit him with your fists. You’re an athlete!” Sami low bridges him to the floor for the big flip dive and a staredown with Owens. Kevin runs in for the DQ at 8:39.

Rating: C. Not much to this one but it was there for the angle instead of the wrestling. They’ve got something here with this four way feud with the title on the line and the match at Extreme Rules should be a lot of fun. There really isn’t a bad option for the title at this point and that’s a very rare situation to have.

Post match Sami gets double teamed until Cesaro runs down for the save, ripping his suit off on the way down the ramp. Cesaro cleans house but accidentally takes out Sami in the process. This time it’s Cesaro holding up the title.

We look back at the end of Raw with the big brawl between Styles/Gallows/Anderson and Reigns/Usos, capped off by Reigns powerbombing AJ through the table.

Anderson and Gallows are a bit disappointed in AJ for not blasting Reigns with the chair on Monday. AJ wanted to keep it clean though because he wants to win the title his own way. Anderson and Gallows respect that but Roman doesn’t respect AJ. Styles likes their suggestions of going extreme and thinks it’s time for a chat with Roman.

Greetings From Puerto Rico.

We look at Enzo Amore’s injury on Sunday.

Vaudevillains vs. Social Outcasts

Dallas/Axel here. Bo starts fast with a powerslam on English for two. Axel comes in to go after Gotch but gets backdropped out to the floor for the save. The Whirling Dervish ends Dallas at 1:51.

Post match Colin Cassady comes out to go after the Vaudevillains and cleans house before Axel gets in to call Gotch and English SAWFT. That earns him a much deserved East River Crossing and Cass shouts a lot.

We look back at Shane and Stephanie gaining power on Sunday and their first night of sharing power on Raw.

Natalya/Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte/Emma

Natalya headlocks Charlotte to the mat to start and it’s off to Becky with Lawler yelling about the cheating going on. This show has been so much easier to sit through with him as a heel like he always should be. It’s already back to Natalya who charges into a boot in the corner and Emma comes in for some stomping. Emma slams her face first into the mat and it’s Charlotte putting on a chinlock.

Natalya finally sends Charlotte into the corner and makes the hot tag to Becky for some armdrags and dropkicks. The comeback is shortlived though as Becky is sent to the floor for a crash, allowing Charlotte to do her headscissor faceplants. Back from a break with Becky getting two off a rollup until a big boot puts her down again.

We get the eternally painful standing on the hair before Charlotte drops a knee. An enziguri puts Emma down though and the hot tag brings in Natalya for the house cleaning. The stepover dropkick sets up the discus lariat (which Ranallo seems to dub Nattie By Nature) on Charlotte but Natalya gets sent into the corner for the Emma Sandwich. Emma takes too long though and it’s the Sharpshooter to make Emma tap at 13:48.

Rating: B. I had a really good time with this one as the division really has evolved to make the whole thing feel important. Perhaps above all else, one of the major reasons has been the ring time. Look at this mach. When is the last time you saw a women’s match get almost fifteen minutes on a random Smackdown? That being said, it also helps that things have been entertaining with a well done tag formula to make everything work. It also helps that the wrestlers are all skilled enough to make the match that much better. Everything is working at this point and that hasn’t been the case for years.

AJ comes in to see Roman Reigns and the Usos. He wants to know if Reigns will be at ringside tonight and Reigns says he’ll be wherever he wants because he’s the champ. In that case, AJ will be at ringside too.

Darren Young has asked Bob Backlund to be his life coach. That’s fine with Backlund, if Young will put everything he has into this.

Zack Ryder vs. Rusev

This has become WWE’s version of Goldberg vs. Jerry Flynn. Ryder gets in a few dropkicks before Rusev slams him down. The Accolade wraps it up at 1:15.

Rusev and Lana do the Kalisto dance until Kalisto runs in for a corkscrew cross body before running away.

Fandango teaches Goldust to dance when R-Truth and Tyler Breeze come in. Goldust is having some issues but Truth says Fandango is the one off beat. A danceoff ensues but Fandango would rather have a tag match next week.

Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows

AJ and Reigns are at ringside. Jey and Karl get things going with the former getting in an uppercut and crucifix for two. A dropkick puts Anderson down again but Karl knocks Jey out to the floor. Karl goes after Reigns though and it’s a DQ at 2:20.

They brawl to a break and I think you know what’s coming.

Roman Reigns/Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows/AJ Styles

Thankfully we don’t miss anything during a break. I’m so glad that’s becoming more of a trend. Styles and Reigns get things going with the champ getting in a quick shoulder and drawing quite a few boos. Reigns powers out of a sunset flip into a fireman’s carry, followed by a hard uppercut for two. Anderson comes in for some right hands as we get those phantom dueling chants. A big boot to the face drops Karl with Ranallo’s name drop of the mafia confusing Jerry. Jey comes in to face Gallows and a kick to Luke’s face allows the tag off to Jimmy as the twins start taking over.

Gallows kicks Jey in the face and we get that awkward staredown in front of the ring. They actually don’t take a break though as it’s AJ coming in and taking a quick enziguri. Reigns comes in off the cold tag and starts cleaning house with a running clothesline to Anderson. The corner clotheslines set up the Superman punch but it takes Gallows off the apron, followed by a suicide dive from Jimmy. The second Superman punch hits Karl in the jaw but AJ takes Reigns out before the spear. Anderson’s spinebuster gets two, only to have the spear put Karl away 7:30.

Rating: C+. Fine main event tag match here though I could have gone with some more time. It’s good to have Reigns get a win to reestablish himself and the World Champion getting the pin on Anderson isn’t going to hurt Karl in the slightest. I’m liking this feud so far and the rematch should be a lot of fun too.

AJ points at the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a much more efficient show with everything working like it should have. They’re not even hiding the fact that Smackdown is meaningless anymore as wrestlers make the matches and Shane/Stephanie never acknowledge that this show exists. All you can ask for is some good wrestling and storyline supplements which is exactly what we had tonight. Fun, easy show here with the women having a really nice match.

Results

Sami Zayn b. The Miz via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered

Vaudevillains b. Social Outcasts – Whirling Dervish to Dallas

Natalya/Becky Lynch b. Charlotte/Emma – Sharpshooter to Emma

Rusev b. Zack Ryder – Accolade

Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows b. Usos via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

Roman Reigns/Usos b. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows/AJ Styles – Spear to Anderson

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: April 28, 2016
Location: Verizon Wireless Arena, Manchester, New Hampshire
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

It’s the final show before Payback and for once in a very long time, WWE seems to be on a roll. The AJ Styles vs. Roman Reigns feud is actually quite entertaining and should serve very well as a first challenge for Reigns’ run as champion. Other than that we have Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens coming up which should add in some good personal violence. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Reigns attacking Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows, who may or may not be in league with AJ.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Reigns to kick things off. Before he gets in the ring, Lawler says it’s fun to boo Reigns. Roman talks about punching AJ in the face on Monday because he knows Styles is with Anderson and Gallows. This brings out the Miz and Maryse of all people with the former introducing his wife and comparing Reigns vs. Styles to the Shawshank Redemption. Apparently not a movie fan, Reigns sends him out to the floor (Lawler: “That man can’t handle the truth.”). On a more polite note though, he hands Maryse the Intercontinental Title.

Reigns vs. Miz is announced for later. Gee that doesn’t seem forced or convenient.

The League of Nations is with Renee Young, who says they seem stronger than ever after getting rid of Barrett. It takes high levels of adorableness to get away with that but she pulls it off. Rusev says they’re now the united nations.

League of Nations vs. Kalisto/Sami Zayn/Cesaro

This is an open challenge from the League. The three of them argue over who gets to start against Kalisto until Sheamus gets to elbow the masked one in the face. Rusev wants to come in and stomp on Kalisto instead but Sheamus doesn’t seem cool with it. We hit the bearhug with Kalisto bouncing up and down until he flips over for a tag off to Zayn. Sheamus offers a distraction to break up the high cross body though and we take a break.

Back with Sheamus kicking Sami in the face for two and Del Rio adding a Backstabber for no cover. You would think those results would be reversed but this team never made a ton of sense. The League gets in a three way argument over who gets to beat on Sami and there goes Del Rio. Sheamus goes up top but hits Rusev by mistake so the Bulgarian leaves as well, allowing Kalisto to come in for his corkscrew cross body. Cesaro does the uppercuts but can’t get in the Swing. That’s enough for Sheamus as he walks out too, earning the countout at 12:04.

Rating: C-. This was an angle instead of a match and that’s fine. I don’t care for having the whole angle rushed together like this but it’s not like the League really needs to have a big sendoff. Sami/Cesaro/Kalisto getting TV time and winning before Sunday’s matches is a good idea but it doesn’t matter unless the right people win at Payback.

After a break, Del Rio gets beaten down in the corner. Sheamus knocks Rusev down too and says the League is finished.

We get the Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens video from Monday.

Baron Corbin vs. Damien Sandow

Corbin sends him out to the floor to start and the beating is on early. Back in and a hard elbow to the back of the head sets up End of Days to pin Sandow at 2:10. Total squash.

AJ isn’t worried about what Reigns thinks.

It’s time for the Ambrose Asylum with guests Charlotte and Natalya but first of all Dean needs to talk about how Jericho never should have let go of the Walls on Monday because the fight will never end. This Sunday, he’s going to turn Bon Jovi into Meatloaf. For now though, please welcome Natalya.

We get some pleasantries with Natalya saying this looks like a dentist office and Dean introducing her to the plant. “I named him Mitch.” Dean remembers Charlotte tapping a few weeks back and it took Ric Flair to make the save. This Sunday is going to be different though because Natalya is going to have Bret Hart in her corner. Cue Charlotte and Ric with the daughter thinking it’s pathetic that Natalya has to parade her uncle around.

Natalya calls her out on her hypocrisy but Charlotte insists that it’s different. She lists off Ric’s accomplishments but Natalya calls him a creepy old man who has to help his daughter cheat to win. Ric laughs off the idea that Bret can stop him because he beat Bret here in the WWE and in WCW and would have beaten him on the moon if Vince had given them the chance. Natalya says this is the chance for the WWE Universe to have the Women’s Champion it deserves to wrap this up. Does anyone else find it kind of lame that the first Women’s Title feud is centered around two old men?

Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady vs. Social Outcasts

Dallas and Axel here. New Day is out on commentary and makes the other announcers stand aside. Makes sense. New Day seems to be fans of Enzo and Cass, with Big E. saying they’re kind of hot. Bo armdrags Enzo down to start and Byron is forced to sit on the floor. Cass throws Enzo at Dallas in the corner but Axel gets in a forearm to the back. Cue the Vaudevillains to watch and it’s a hot tag off to Cass for the house cleaning. Thankfully we get New Day’s over the top sports commentary for the whole match, which is capped off by the Rocket Launcher to put Axel away at 2:45. It’s strange seeing these two win a squash.

Cass promises to show the Vaudevillains how SAWFT they are.

Goldust comes up to R-Truth in the back and says he can feel the Golden Truth after they danced together last week. Tyler Breeze comes in because he’s Truth’s new partner. Goldust is dejected again but Fandango comes in to ask if he wants to dance. Fandango sits next to him and dances anyway.

Greetings From Puerto Rico.

Apollo Crews vs. Stardust

Crews throws him down to start and Stardust takes an early break on the floor. Apollo goes out after him but gets his leg twisted on the way back in. It’s time to crank on the leg a bit more as the gloves have been taken off. Crews pops up and hits a quick pumphandle slam, though he’s nice enough to hold the knee after he does the move perfectly. Two straight enziguris set up the lifting powerbomb to give Apollo the pin at 2:59.

Recap of Stephanie and Shane on Monday.

Roman Reigns vs. The Miz

Non-title and AJ Styles is watching from ringside. Miz actually gets the early advantage by sending Reigns face first into the middle buckle, only to be punched in the face to make things right. Roman kicks him on the floor but gets in a staredown with AJ, allowing Miz to get in a cheap shot as we take a break. Back with Miz holding a chinlock and pulling back on Reigns’ nose.

A top rope ax handle gets two as Byron says this could send a message to Cesaro on Sunday. Or it could make Miz the next #1 contender but that’s not happening so it’s not mentioned. Reigns gets in a Samoan drop and starts his comeback with the clotheslines. Miz bails to the floor to avoid a spear before sliding back inside for the short DDT. The Skull Crushing Finale is easily broken up though and Reigns gets in the spear for the pin at 10:42.

Rating: C+. For a match with no shock to the ending between two guys that a lot of fans don’t care for, this was quite the entertaining little match. I can live with Miz eating another pinfall when it’s to the World Champion, especially since there’s no reason to believe that Miz will be champion after Sunday.

Post match AJ gets in the ring but here are Anderson and Gallows to beat Reigns down. The Usos run out for the save, even though AJ never touched Reigns. AJ yells at Anderson but Karl takes the spear for Reigns. The Superman Punch misses AJ and it’s a big staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It’s a rare thing to see Raw as the better show of the week but that’s exactly what we had here. Smackdown was its normal self here with almost nothing worth seeing and little more than a build up to the pay per view. The wrestling was nothing special and the build was the standard stuff that you would expect. In other words, it was Smackdown.

Results

Sami Zayn/Cesaro/Kalisto b. League of Nations via countout

Baron Corbin b. Damien Sandow – End of Days

Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady b. Social Outcasts – Rocket Launcher to Axel

Apollo Crews b. Stardust – Lifting powerbomb

Roman Reigns b. Miz – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: April 21, 2016
Location: O2 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

It’s the last show on the UK tour and we’re in the same building we were in on Monday for Raw. These shows can range from nothing special to more interesting than usual but Smackdown tends to be just your run of the mill show. We’re getting closer to Payback though and the card is looking stacked. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of AJ vs. Roman on Monday, including Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson beating Reigns down.

It’s time for MizTV with Maryse handling the introduction before Miz brings out guest AJ Styles. Miz gets right to the point of asking about AJ being tight with Gallows and Anderson in New Japan, to the point that he knows them better than anyone else. Styles denies being behind the attack but he never told them NOT to attack Reigns. Miz continues being awesome at needling as AJ eventually gets annoyed at him for asking about Gallows and Anderson over and over again.

The fact of the matter is that AJ doesn’t need them to beat Reigns but Miz thinks that being a better “rassler” isn’t going to get it done because Roman Reigns is the guy. Miz says he can handle the truth from AJ but Maryse tells him to go Will Smith. This leads to a rather romantic moment which disgusts AJ so badly that he backfists Miz in the face.

AJ vs. Miz is set for later.

Ryback vs. Kalisto

Non-title for no apparent reason other than Kalisto loses here because the title is back to meaning nothing. Ryback runs him over in the corner and the GOLDBERG chants begin for reasons of general annoyance. Kalisto’s kicks have little effect as Ryback gorilla presses him down and sends him shoulder first into the post as we take a break. Back with Ryback doing his delayed superplex for a delayed two count.

Ryback puts him in the Tree of Woe for kicks to the ribs, only to miss a charge and go shoulder first into the post. Kalisto’s kicks to the chest and corkscrew cross body stagger Ryback and the hurricanrana driver gets two. Ryback hits a quick Meathook but the Shell Shock is countered into a DDT for two more. The Salida Del Sol is countered into the Shell Shock to give Ryback the pin at 9:42.

Rating: C-. It’s clear that WWE wants to put the title on Ryback and I have no idea why they just don’t do it at this point. Kalisto means nothing as champion at this point as he won the belt and then did nothing with it ever since (as is so often the case) so just give it to Ryback who could be a decent monster for someone to slay later on. First though, we get a rubber match because that’s how the midcard titles roll around here.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin

Never mind as Corbin jumps Ziggler during the entrance and beats him down on the floor as has become his custom.

The Miz vs. AJ Styles

Non-title again. Miz gets clotheslined down to start and AJ goes old school with a Muta Lock (bridging Indian deathlock with a chinlock) but Miz gets his head out and rolls to the floor. Back in and AJ gets caught with some knees to the back, only to hit a quick dropkick (Lawler: “That was a miso soup dropkick wasn’t it?”). A spinwheel kick drops Miz again so he hides behind Maryse, allowing him to get in a left hand to drop AJ.

Styles gets sent into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Miz stomping away in the corner and hitting that running clothesline. We hit the chinlock (because of course) but AJ jawbreaks his way to freedom. A big boot drops Styles again (Miz can throw a nice boot) but it’s a double cross body to put both of them down. AJ is up first though and gets in the running seated forearm for two. Miz starts going after the knee before a DDT gets two more.

The Skull Crushing Finale is countered into the fireman’s carry backbreaker onto the knee (which Lawler pronounces correctly for once) for another near fall but AJ dives into an atomic drop. We hit the Figure Four for a bit until AJ turns it over with Ranallo doing a great job of putting over AJ as someone who will never quit.

The Calf Crusher goes on out of nowhere but Miz is too close to the ropes. Styles hit the Pele and that’s enough for Miz who tries to walk, only to run into Gallows and Anderson. Miz makes the mistake of turning around and it’s a slingshot forearm to set up the Phenomenal version for the pin on Miz at 17:55.

Rating: B. I know I’m in the minority but I’ve been a big Miz fan for a long time now. No he’s not going to get back to the main event or anything but he’s more than capable of having a strong performance against someone who can walk him through a match. They’re doing a really good job of setting AJ up as someone who could shock the world at Payback. That’s an impressive feat, especially if they go somewhere else with this Bullet Club story after the pay per view. Oh and well done on having both midcard champions lose clean in less than an hour and a half.

We look at the end of Raw with Jericho and Owens taking out Zayn and Ambrose.

Ambrose and Zayn are ready for Owens and Jericho in tonight’s main event. Spotted dick is referenced but they can’t decide on a cool team name.

In what might be a dark segment that won’t air on the TV show, Miz and Maryse are still in the ring after the match. Miz says he knew Gallows and Anderson were with AJ but that just showed he was right. Tonight there was an injustice and he demands an investigation on this match right here and right now. Miz doesn’t care how long it takes because he wants someone to come out here.

Cue Shane McMahon to say what’s up London. That’s not cool with Miz because he should be a priority to everyone on any show. He pokes Shane a bit and that’s not cool with the red show boss. Miz pokes him a few more times so Shane punches him in the face and drops him with the back elbow to the jaw before clotheslining him out to the floor. Again, not likely to make the show but a cool thing for the crowd.

Post break, Gallows and Anderson say they’re here to make an impact and aren’t here with Styles. They’ll debut on Monday against the Usos.

Paige/Natalya vs. Naomi/Tamina

Tamina and Natalya get things going but it’s quickly off to Naomi for her stupid wiggling headscissors without any actual damage being done to Natalya. Seriously, the Divas era is done so stop that nonsense. Paige comes in to help with a double wishbone before it’s already back to Natalya because Paige being in the ring in front of her home crowd would be a waste of time.

Naomi drops Natalya again and shouts that Natalya wants to wrestle. Well kind of yeah. We hit the chinlock from Tamina for a bit before Natalya easily gets over for the tag off to Paige. Naomi gets sent into the buckle and the Rampaige gets one with Tamina making the save. Natalya comes back in and it’s a Sharpshooter to Tamina while Paige gets Naomi to tap to the PTO at 5:33.

Rating: D+. I like that double submission ending as you let Natalya look good while Paige gets to win in front of her home country. It’s really tiring to see her lose all the time but with the way the division has been realigned, maybe she has to be moved down to the lower levels. I’m still a fan of hers but she’s really not up to the top level at this point.

Fandango vs. R-Truth

Goldust is guest referee and this is fallout from Goldust teaming with Fandango instead of Truth last week. They trade knockdowns and trade hip swivels. More dancing ensues with Goldust joining in until Truth lays Fandango out with the Lie Detector for the pin at 1:53. I have no idea where they’re going with this but if they could get to the point already, it would be most appreciated.

Goldust and Truth dance post match with Goldust looking terrified at the thought of trying the splits.

Here are Enzo Amore and Colin Cassady for a chat about the tag team tournament final. Enzo gets through the opening spiel before the Vaudevillains cut him off. English thinks Enzo has mange so Enzo thinks the Vaudevillains are a couple of haters. Apparently the G stands for gentlemen so Enzo is going to be honest with him. That thing English said about him having rodent mange……well Enzo really doesn’t know what it means.

Gotch insults Enzo’s rhyming (hater) and English says that it’s going to take two real men to show what a real era should be like. After they win the tournament, Simon promises to use proper pronunciation and ask “how are you doing”. Cass thinks that’s SAWFT. This was a really good exchange and a much better introduction to the Vaudevillains than we’ve seen so far.

Greeting From Puerto Rico.

Dean Ambrose/Sami Zayn vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Jericho and Zayn get things going with Sami doing that reverse leapfrog and armdragging Chris down into an armbar. Dean comes in and has to spin out of a Walls attempt but can’t get Dirty Deeds as we head to a break. Back with Owens elbowing Ambrose in the head and slowly hammering away. Jericho can’t keep Dean in the corner though and it’s off to Sami for the high cross body and a near fall.

Sami loads up the corner climbing wristdrag but opts to dive onto Owens instead. Makes sense. That’s fine with Owens as he pulls Sami outside and pounds away as Dean has been down WAY longer than he should have after a beating. It’s back to Jericho for a chinlock followed by a Lionsault for a very calm near fall. The Blue Thunder Bomb doesn’t even warrant a cover here but it’s a double tag to Ambrose and Owens with the latter running into a boot in the corner.

Dean hits the suicide dive through the ropes but Owens gets in a superkick for two. The fans are having some issues getting into this one even though it’s certainly not bad. A quick Dirty Deeds and the Helluva kick have the heels in trouble but Dean goes up instead of covering, allowing Jericho to crotch him on the ropes, giving Owens a quick pin at 12:53.

Rating: C. Totally standard Smackdown main event tag match and while that’s fine, it’s certainly nothing you need to see. I like the idea of putting two feuds into one match but they’re out of combinations to do before the pay per view, which is a common problem WWE runs into. Ambrose getting pinned via cheating is a good idea as well.

Owens is very pleased with the win to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was stronger tonight but my goodness some of the booking decisions made my head hurt. As usual the midcard titles mean nothing because they’re just midcard titles and a way to make people look good by beating midcard champions. It’s so backwards compared to the way things used to go and went for years that it makes no sense but I’m sure WWE can explain it better to you than I could. They speak crazy like that you see.

Results

Ryback b. Kalisto – Shell Shock

AJ Styles b. The Miz – Phenomenal Forearm

Paige/Natalya b. Naomi/Tamina – PTO to Naomi

R-Truth b. Fandango – Lie Detector

Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho b. Sami Zayn/Dean Ambrose – Owens pinned Ambrose after Jericho crotched him

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: April 13, 2016
Location: Valley View Casino, San Diego, California
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

It’s going to be an interesting week as most of the roster is off on the international tour. However we have some fresh names tonight in the Vaudevillains who debuted last week and the even fresher team of Enzo and Big Cass, both of whom will be in the tag team tournament tonight. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Del Rio vs. Styles and Jericho vs. Zayn tonight, both for the first time ever.

Maryse introduces the Miz for MizTV. Miz calls her the love of his life and the only woman worthy of being his wife. It seems that Maryse is the guest this week as Miz asks what it’s like to be married to him. That would be perfection with Maryse calling Miz an a-lister and a role model for children around the world. Miz actually gets on his knee in front of her to promise holidays with Leo in St. Bart’s, which Maryse calls the real life People Magazine.

This leads to them making out, only to be interrupted by Zack Ryder because he doesn’t seem to get that it’s over. Ryder asks Maryse what it’s like to be married to someone who wears more makeup than her. Yeah the title might be gone but Ryder is looking forward to seeing Cesaro take the title from Miz at Payback. This sets up a challenge for a title match right now but apparently Ryder already has a match tonight. For some reason Miz knows this and Ryder doesn’t.

Zack Ryder vs. Baron Corbin

Corbin throws Ryder around like the jobber that he is to start before sending him out to the apron. Whatever springboard move Ryder was trying is knocked out of the air with a single punch as the announcers put Corbin’s battle royal win over very hard. We hit the chinlock on Ryder, followed by a northern lariat (correctly called by Ranallo). Zack gets in a middle rope dropkick for his hope spot but the Broski Boot doesn’t work. Instead the End of Days puts Ryder away at 3:12.

Rating: D+. Well it was nice while it lasted Zack but we’re back to reality now. This was the same squash that it would have been even if Ryder never won the title in the first place, which makes that whole thing feel even less important. Corbin has a good presence to him and the finish still looks good but he’ll need to go somewhere else before this gets tiresome.

Post match Corbin goes after Ryder again but Dolph Ziggler runs out for the save. I’m assuming that’s Corbin’s first major win.

Kevin Owens mocks Renee Young and threatens to get involved in Zayn vs. Jericho. His advice is to have Renee go ask Sami if there’s any insight as to what’s going to happen in the main event.

Emma vs. Paige

Paige gets a jobber entrance. The announcers make various unfunny jokes and puns as Paige takes Emma into the corner to start, only to get caught in a rollup to send her head first into the bottom buckle. Emma stomps away in the corner and we hit a seated full nelson as Ranallo actually brings up the Fabulous Kangaroos. Paige kicks away and gets two off a running knee to the chest. Some right hands in the corner are broken up with Emma dropping Paige face first onto the top turnbuckle…..for the pin at 3:16.

Rating: C. Well it was no NXT classic but they did enough to make Emma look more like a player on the main roster. It’s a shame how badly they screwed her up a few years back but it’s nice to see that things could turn around for her. There’s potential there and if they’re going to set up something with this division, they’ll need all the help they can get.

We recap the first two tournament matches and the debut of Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows.

We look back at Bray Wyatt teaming with Roman Reigns on Monday. I guess we can call that the first shovel of dirt out of Bray’s grave after Rock buried him eight days prior. You know, because he totally did and when you’re buried, it’s because your career is over. Like, totally over and there’s no recovery ever.

Tag Team Tournament First Round: Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady vs. Ascension

Enzo and Cass are WAY over here, as you would expect. Before the match, Enzo talks about how tough a neighborhood they grew up in. It was so tough that they almost got sent to live with their auntie and uncle in Bel-Air. He could think of a million bad things to say about the Ascension but the worst of all is that they’re the Ascension. Cass promises to win the titles and declares all of their opponents to be SAWFT.

Enzo and Konnor get things going with a hard shoulder dropping Amore. It’s off to Viktor who is quickly sent into the wrong corner, allowing the tag to Big Cass. Enzo gets slammed onto Viktor for two but Konnor knocks Amore off the apron and into the barricade to take over. Back in and Viktor slaps on a chinlock for a bit before avoiding a charge to send Konnor into the post. The hot tag brings in Cass for the house cleaning, including the Empire Elbow to Viktor. Everything breaks down and Konnor gets kicked in the face, followed by the East River Crossing and Rocket Launcher for the pin on Viktor at 4:33.

Rating: C. Nothing for the wrestling but the important thing here is how Enzo and Cass know how to work the formula. Cass is great at coming in and cleaning house after the smaller Enzo takes a big beating. There’s a great history of big guy/small guy teams and these two have more than enough charisma to go around, meaning they could have a nice future ahead of them.

AJ Styles talks about fighting everywhere to get to the top and now he has to fight Roman Reigns to get to the top of WWE. Alberto Del Rio comes in and says that Del Rio has been fighting for table scraps but tonight we’ll get to see if all that hype is real. Del Rio says AJ doesn’t belong here and AJ agrees. AJ: “I belong in the ring.”

AJ Styles vs. Alberto Del Rio

In a far too common theme tonight, Del Rio drives him into the corner to start as Ranallo compares AJ vs. Reigns to Muhammad Ali vs. Ken Norton. Well at least it’s not Scott Norton. The feeling out process sets up the dropdown into the dropkick, which you really should see coming if you’ve ever watched any AJ Styles match.

AJ fires off chops but gets kicked in the chest for two. A top rope ax handle gets two more before AJ sidesteps a charge to send Alberto’s shoulder into the post. The running enziguri knocks AJ off the apron and a big dropkicks ends AJ out to the floor again. Back from a break with AJ fighting out of a chinlock, as so often happens when we come back from a break.

The striking sequence drops Del Rio and AJ nips up, followed by the running clothesline in the corner. AJ loads up a pumphandle but gets countered into a Backstabber to leave his mouth hanging open. The low superkick misses though and AJ Pele’s him for two. Del Rio gets in a reverse superplex and thankfully doesn’t severely hurt AJ by dropping him on his head. Alberto misses the top rope double stomp but avoids the forearm. Instead it’s the armbreaker, which is quickly countered into a rollup for the pin on Alberto at 13:55.

Rating: B. They’re doing a good job of building AJ up as the guy who never gives up and fights until the end, especially against big names that are higher up on the food chain. It’s almost like they’re doing a good job of building up a challenger before a champion knocks him off in the title match. Good match here and the well booked story continues.

Goldust tells R-Truth that Golden Truth won’t be a thing tonight. Fandango comes in and announces himself as Goldust’s new partner, which means tandem gyrating. Truth doesn’t want to join them and looks flabbergasted.

Tag Team Tournament First Round: Vaudevillains vs. Goldust/Fandango

English stomps on Goldust to start and a double right hand puts him down. The snap powerslam gets Goldust out of trouble and it’s off to Fandango for a comeback that goes nowhere. Well other than into a Whirling Dervish to send the Vaudevillains to the semi-finals that is.

We look back at Dean Ambrose taking over the Highlight Reel and laying Jericho out.

Jericho says he’s been beating up amateurs since he got back because people like Styles and Ambrose have no respect for the veterans. He’s the greatest of all time and proved it right here in this dump (“Yeah it’s a dump!”) when he beat the Rock and Stone Cold in one night. Tonight he’ll make Zayn feel the pain because he’s the best in the world at what he does.

Greetings From Puerto Rico video.

Sami Zayn vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho poses to start so Sami rips the skin off his chest with a chop. That sends Jericho outside for a chair through….and here’s Kevin Owens. He doesn’t get very far down the ramp before Dean Ambrose comes out with fliers for the Ambrose Asylum before sitting in on commentary. Sami finally remembers that a match is going on and rolls Jericho up for two. Dean annoys Jericho with a flier and we take a break.

Back with Owens on commentary as well and actually complimenting Dean on the new show. Jericho knocks Zayn outside and poses a bit before a top rope back elbow gets two. We hit the ASK HIM chinlock as Dean and Owens get in a mini argument, resulting in Owens throwing away his flier. Sami gets a quick two off a high cross body and the climb up the corner tornado DDT gets the same. The Helluva Kick misses though and the Walls go on to put Sami in real trouble.

Ropes are of course reached but Sami’s springboard is broken up by a running forearm. Owens and Ambrose are now full on cheerleaders until Jericho runs Dean over and sends him into the barricade. Jericho dives at Sami but hits Owens by mistake before heading back inside. Chris yells at Sami a lot, earning himself an exploder suplex into the corner. The Helluva Kick is loaded up but Owens comes in for the DQ at 15:11.

Rating: B-. I liked AJ vs. Del Rio a little bit more but this also set up a few things down the road while also building up the two pay per view matches. Sami winning without getting the pin is a good idea as you can’t keep having him get pinned all the time. It’s not a great match or anything but at least it set some stuff up for the future.

Sami and Dean clean house to end the show and likely set up a tag match.

Overall Rating: B. Now that’s more like it. This was how you run a Smackdown as there was good wrestling to go along with some (basic) storyline advancement. It’s always nice to see them doing something interesting and important instead of just having matches for the sake of matches. The extra wrestling helped as well with the mostly empty roster helping more than it hurt, which was quite the surprise.

Results

Baron Corbin b. Zack Ryder – End of Days

Emma b. Paige – Emma pinned Paige after dropping her onto the top turnbuckle

Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady b. Ascension – Rocket Launcher to Viktor

AJ Styles b. Alberto Del Rio – Rollup

Vaudevillains b. Goldust/Fandango – Whirling Dervish to Fandango

Sami Zayn b. Chris Jericho via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: April 7, 2016
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler

Things have changed a bit since last time and WWE has hit the ground mostly running since this Sunday’s Wrestlemania. The big story coming out of Monday is AJ Styles being crowned as a surprising #1 contender to new champion Roman Reigns, which might get some buildup starting tonight. Also we have the Vaudevillains making their main roster debut so let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of Wrestlemania.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Roman Reigns to get things going, drawing a good deal of booing in the process. Reigns gets right to the point by saying he took on the Authority and won this title. When you have this title, everybody wants it so that means it’s one vs. all again. Reigns gets in the “I’m THE guy” line again and I’m still not sure how I feel on that. I get what they’re going for here but it’s still not the answer to their problems. Saying Reigns isn’t a good guy might take away some of the stigma around him but it’s not going to make people like him either. Maybe that’s what they’re going for and if so then cool, though it’s still not working great.

Anyway Reigns brings up being the new champion and getting ready to beat AJ Styles, which brings out AJ himself. Styles praises Reigns for having a great Wrestlemania, but he had a heck of a Monday Night Raw. That means it’s time for AJ to come for the World Title because he’s been all over the world and wants to win that prize. Reigns says AJ can want it all he wants but it means he has to beat THE GUY. Yeah AJ has beaten a lot of guys but he’s never beaten Reigns, and he never will.

This feud could go somewhere interesting but I’m still not sure how well it’s going to get there yet. Reigns beating AJ as a challenger of the month is a good idea because AJ will get a good match out of him, though that THE GUY idea needs some work. It’s certainly an interesting idea but they need to figure out how to put everything together.

We look back at Vince giving Shane control over Raw, completely negating the importance of the last six weeks or so of this story. That might be better for everyone involved actually.

Lucha Dragons vs. Vaudevillains

This is the Vaudevillains’ (Aiden English/Simon Gotch) main roster debut after a long time down in NXT. Cara and English get things going with Mauro telling us about some martial art that English practices. Cara backdrops him down and brings Kalisto in for the monkey flip 450. As Lawler seems to call him “Hayden English”, Simon breaks up Kalisto’s dive with a quick knee from the corner.

English puts on a chinlock as Mauro gives a quick history of some martial art that Gotch uses called Bartitsu. Cara armdrags Aiden down and makes the hot tag off to Kalisto as things speed way up. Everything breaks down with Cara being taken down on the floor, leaving Kalisto to take the Whirling Dervish for the pin at 4:03, because SIN CARA CAN’T TAKE A PIN FOR WHATEVER FREAKING REASON.

Rating: D+. The match was watchable and fine but had no spark to it. The Vaudevillains really aren’t that exciting of a team as you see their gimmick and realize there’s nothing more to it than what you see. Kalisto losing makes me shake my head and reenforces the fact that this team needs to split or Kalisto needs to drop the title. You can’t be in a low level team and hold a title at the same time as it leads to bad losses like this which mean nothing but still devalue the title.

Stills package of the ladder match and a video of Ryder losing the title the next night to Miz.

We see Lita presenting Charlotte with the new Women’s Title and everyone but Natalya leaving, probably setting up a title match soon down the line.

Natalya vs. Summer Rae

Charlotte is on commentary with Flair by her side. Natalya easily takes it to the mat to start and does her stepover into the basement dropkick. Summer sends her outside for a snap suplex as we actually get a Beautiful Fierce Females reference from the champ. That’s a faction I haven’t thought of in years. We hit the chinlock back inside, only to have Natalya pop up and grab the Sharpshooter for the tap out at 2:54. This was exactly what you would have expected.

We look back at Reigns winning the title and being challenged by Jericho, Styles, Owens and Zayn, followed by Styles winning the four way to become #1 contender.

Intercontinental Title: Zack Ryder vs. Miz

Miz is defending and has Maryse introduce him. Ryder gets a quick rollup for two and he’s already looking desperate. A forearm and slingshot splash get two for Ryder, followed by a dropkick through the ropes for the same. Back from a break with Miz kicking out of something we don’t see and getting in a quick shot to set up the Reality Check for two. A knee to the ribs keeps Ryder in trouble and Miz makes it even worse by calling him a loser. Now come on. Just because you’re a cocky heel with a gorgeous wife doesn’t mean you have to be impolite.

Ryder comes back with a dropkick but dives http://onhealthy.net/product-category/diabetes/ into a sitout powerbomb. That’s not something you see Miz use that often. The short DDT gets two on Ryder but he comes right back with a facebuster for two of his own. A Broski Boot on the floor sets up the Elbro (yes the Elbro) for two back inside. Not that it matters as Maryse offers a distraction, allowing Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale to retain at 12:36.

Rating: C-. Well so much for Ryder. I get that this was supposed to be Neville (it would have made much more sense) and that it was never going to last but it begs the question: why not put the title on Ziggler? I know the match has been overdone but Ziggler at least has some credibility. Ryder has won two Raw/Smackdown matches in about two years and we were supposed to buy him as Intercontinental Champion? That just doesn’t work, no matter how you spin it.

The Social Outcasts play Rock Paper Scissors to determine who gets to face Apollo Crews. Axel is the odd man out but says he wins because the ax beats all.

Curtis Axel vs. Apollo Crews

Axel gets in a quick shot but heads outside for the Bo Train. That’s not cool with Crews who goes outside and pops Axel in the jaw. A Rose distraction lets Axel get in another cheap shot to take over but Crews clotheslines him down and nips up. The standing moonsault gets two and the lifting sitout powerbomb puts Axel away at 2:35.

Video on the Andre battle royal, focusing on Shaquille O’Neal appearing and Baron Corbin getting the win. We also see Corbin beating up Ziggler, though the match wound up as a double countout.

Corbin says the end of days is here.

Stills of the Women’s Title triple threat from Sunday. Thankfully Ranallo says the Women’s Title is back instead of being introduced.

Becky Lynch says Sunday was a brutal match but she’ll never lose her passion. That’s what it’s all about and that’s why she walked out of Charlotte’s speech on Monday. Emma comes in to brag about getting to the WWE first, probably setting up a match for some point in the future.

Primo and Epico video about how awesome Puerto Rico is.

Dean Ambrose vs. Tyler Breeze

Dean is right on him with shots in the corner and avoids a charge to make things even worse. A big clothesline sets up Dirty Deeds for the pin on Breeze at 1:15.

Ambrose leaves as Chris Jericho is coming out for the main event, giving us a staredown.

Goldust is pitching Shattered Dreams Productions II when R-Truth comes in with a camera to be the director. Apparently there’s going to be a top Hollywood producer at Raw this Monday and Truth can get him an audition. For some reason Goldust goes along with this.

Cesaro/AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Cesaro still has that awesome tear away suit. Jericho and Styles get things going with Chris eating an early dropkick. Cesaro comes in and scares Jericho to the floor as we take a break. Back with Styles knocking Jericho into the wrong corner before it’s off to Cesaro vs. Owens for some hard shouts to the face. Both heels have to avoid the Cesaro Swing and Jericho is able to get in a shot to the back for his first advantage.

Owens teases the Cannonball but opts for a clothesline instead before tagging Jericho in (Owens: “High five!”). The already slow paced match slows down even more with Jericho cranking on Cesaro’s arms. Back up and Cesaro throws him to the floor, only to have Jericho pull AJ off the apron to break up the hot tag. Owens comes in and misses the Cannonball and NOW it’s the hot tag to AJ as everything breaks down.

AJ cleans house but Owens quickly takes over, only to eat a Pele. Jericho breaks up the Phenomenal Forearm and the package side slam gets two on AJ. Cesaro beats on Jericho outside as Sami Zayn comes out to go after Owens. The distraction lets AJ roll Owens up for the pin at 13:03.

Rating: C-. I really didn’t care for this one as they were just going through the motions for a bit until the ending. The wrestling was fine but I never felt like this match mattered. Unfortunately that’s most Smackdown main events in a nutshell: watchable but completely inconsequential more often than not.

Owens and Zayn (whose arm is heavily taped) brawl post match with security breaking it up but accidentally allowing Owens to get in a clean shot to the jaw. Zayn is sent into the steps to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Oh yeah Wrestlemania week has wrapped up and you can feel the energy going down. This was a slightly hotter than usual Smackdown though the quality really wasn’t there. It was a bunch of Wrestlemania fallout stuff but since this isn’t Raw, almost nothing happened and you could skip a lot of this without missing a single thing.

Results

Vaudevillains b. Lucha Dragons – Whirling Dervish to Kalisto

Natalya b. Summer Rae – Sharpshooter

Miz b. Zack Ryder – Skull Crushing Finale

Apollo Crews b. Curtis Axel – Lifting sitout powerbomb

Dean Ambrose b. Tyler Breeze – Dirty Deeds

AJ Styles/Cesaro b. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho – Rollup to Owens

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: March 31, 2016
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mauro Ranallo

This is one of the most unique shows of the year as it’s mostly going to be about building up Wrestlemania. The few matches that will be on here were taped on Monday at Raw so the crowd is going to be hotter than usual. Expect a lot of video packages here though as that’s the point of the show. Let’s get to it.

AJ Styles vs. Heath Slater

Before the match, the Outcasts talk about how the four of them are going to win the battle royal. Axel dubs the team the Phenomenal Four. Rose: “You really racked your brain to come up with that one didn’t you?” Slater gets in a boot to the head to knock AJ outside, sending him head first into the steps. I’ll go on a limb and say that’s the extent of his major offense in this match.

We hit a chinlock back inside followed by a jumping heel kick (Lawler: “That was fournomenal!”) for two on Styles. Slater misses a splash though and AJ makes his comeback with the speedy strikes, including a Pele to Rose. The Phenomenal Forearm puts Slater away at 4:45.

Rating: D. I really wasn’t feeling this one as Slater shouldn’t be beating AJ up for any given amount of time. I’m fine with him getting in a little offense here and there but this as about 80% Slater and that’s a really bad sign with Wrestlemania just a few days away. Bad match planning here and that’s not good.

Byron Saxton and Renee Young are at AT&T Stadium to introduce a lot of videos throughout the night. Yeah that’s going to be the big bulk of the show.

Long video on Shane vs. Undertaker, mostly stuff we’ve seen on Raw already.

Network shill.

Hall of Fame ad.

Video on Ambrose vs. Lesnar.

Pre-show preview.

Video on HHH using the Dudley Boyz to trap Reigns from Raw and the ensuing brawl.

Video on Snoop Dogg being inducted into the celebrity wing of the Hall of Fame.

Jey Uso vs. D-Von Dudley

Jey pounds in the corner to start and clotheslines D-Von out to the floor, earning himself a jawing session with Bubba. Back in and Jey’s charge goes into the post, allowing Bubba to get in a right hand to really change control. A top rope splash misses though and it’s time for the kicks, followed by a Samoan drop. The running Umaga attack causes Bubba to start a D-Von chant, which works far better than it should for the heel act. Bubba and Jimmy get into it on the floor, allowing D-Von to get in a spinebuster for the pin at 4:25.

Rating: C. Believe it or not this was fine. It’s kind of hard to screw up a match that only goes four minutes and has someone as capable as D-Von in there. The match is going to be fine but it’s just not a story that I really want to see. It’s also interesting that the Usos are the same in singles matches that they are in tags. You don’t often see two wrestlers who are so similar and really change nothing when they’re in the same match.

Video on the Divas Title triple threat.

Ad for Thank You Daniel on the WWE Network, which really is entertaining.

Clip of Del Rio vs. Kofi on Monday and Coach’s post match cameo.

Byron and Renee talk about the World Title match.

Video on Reigns vs. HHH.

Dean Ambrose vs. Erick Rowan

Bray and Strowman only come to the stage so Rowan is on his own here. They slug it out to start with Rowan getting the better of it off a back elbow. Dean sends him outside and knees him from the apron as we take a break. Back with Rowan getting two off a reverse powerslam (ala Lucha Underground’s Matanza) and slapping on the chinlock. Dean’s comeback is stopped by a boot to the face and it’s time for that head vice.

Erick mixes things up with a middle rope back elbow to the jaw (ala Bayley of all people) but takes too long going up and gets superplexed down. Dean gets in the suicide shove and the standing elbow drop gets two. A sitout Rock Bottom (Matt Hardy’s Side Effect) and a spinwheel kick give Rowan a pair of near falls but Dirty Deeds ends Rowan at 13:58.

Rating: D. Yeah this was nothing. It was a lot of rest holds before we got to the exact ending everyone knew we were getting. Then again, this isn’t exactly a show that is going to be held to a high standard. Rowan is nothing more than the guy you send out there to look big and intimidating and then lose every time. That’s going to keep him employed for a very long time though as it’s a role that has to be fulfilled.

A quick plug of the Austin Podcast with Mick Foley takes us out.

Overall Rating: D. Like I said in the main event, this wasn’t supposed to be a regular show. The wrestling was there for the sake of saying there was wrestling on the show in between the videos. That being said, the show accomplished its goal of being a big commercial for Wrestlemania, which means it’s good if you don’t watch regularly but a huge waste of time if you watch every week. I’d call it a necessary evil and that has to be expected with this meaningless episode every year.

Results

AJ Styles b. Heath Slater – Phenomenal Forearm

D-Von Dudley b. Jey Uso – Spinebuster

Dean Ambrose b. Erick Rowan – Dirty Deeds

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: March 24, 2016
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

Brock is here for a rare Smackdown appearance so you know we’re getting closer and closer to Wrestlemania. There are two shows left before the biggest show of the year and things are ranging from hot to lukewarm at best so it should be interesting to see which one we get here tonight. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Non-title and Becky Lynch is on commentary. We’re not quite ready to go though as Charlotte promises to lead the WOO Revolution over Sasha and Becky in front of a record setting crowd in Dallas. Simple speech but rather efficient. Like any good heel champion, Charlotte is on the floor before anything can happen to her. Back in and Sasha flips her over for two before slapping the champ in the face.

Charlotte comes back with a kick to the face and a neckbreaker, giving us a good old fashioned WOO. We hit the chinlock before a big chop puts Banks down again. A Thesz press gets two on the champ but the double knees in the corner miss. They head outside for a minute and it’s Sasha being whipped into Becky. Charlotte takes her back inside for the Figure Eight, only to be small packaged to give Sasha the surprise pin at 4:56.

Rating: C. Not a great match as they didn’t have time but hopefully the intensity shown here is a good indication of what we’re going to be seeing in Dallas. They’re doing a good job of setting this up as a match where anyone can win, even though I can’t imagine Becky having much of a chance. Good TV match here though and that’s how you build to the big stuff.

Post match Becky gets in the ring for a Bex Plex to both of them, followed by Sasha giving Charlotte a Backstabber.

Here’s New Day for their weekly chat. We’re just ten days away from Wrestlemania XXXII and they’ll be having a match against the League of Nations. The League is so boring that they’re like the going to the DMV of WWE. If they were a Star Wars character, they would be the Jar Jar Binks of WWE. Or if they were another sports star they would be the Michael Jordan of baseball. As usual, this was all about how strong New Day sells the material instead of whatever they’re actually saying.

Kofi Kingston vs. Sheamus

No Del Rio for some reason. Sheamus isn’t playing around here and throws Kofi into the corner for an early stomping. It’s not quite the Unicorn Stampede but Sheamus is hardly trained for such combat. Kofi gets back up for some stomping of his own to send Sheamus to the floor. A big standoff is teased but the power of Francesca II calms things down. Kofi gets tripped off the apron though and we take a break.

Back with Kofi still in trouble and Rusev shouting in some insults. We hit the chinlock with Sheamus clearly calling some spots, one of which seems to be missing a middle rope knee drop. Things get even worse for Sheamus as he misses a charge into the post to start Kofi’s comeback. There’s the Boom Drop and Kofi follows with a flip dive over the top to take out Sheamus again. Back in and Sheamus grabs a suplex slam for two before going for a turnbuckle pad. Rusev offers a distraction so New Day chases him off, only to have Barrett’s distraction set up the Brogue Kick for the pin on Kofi at 10:28.

Rating: C-. Kofi is getting better and better every week, to the point where I could easily see him going up to the main event after the New Day run is over. You have to give the League something before they get to the pay per view though and this was as fine as anything else, especially with them playing up the numbers advantage for the League.

Usos vs. Ascension

Viktor runs Jey over to start and it’s off to Konnor for a chinlock. That goes as far as a first minute chinlock is going to go as Jey fights up and sends Konnor into the corner. Everything breaks down and a double superkick puts Viktor away at 1:37.

Post match the Usos put Viktor through a table.

The Dudley Boyz don’t think much of the Usos as they’re only two time Tag Team Champions. They’ve beaten up Rikishi and they could beat up the Wild Samoans, but here’s Roman Reigns to interrupt. Reigns doesn’t like the way Bubba is disrespecting his family so let’s have a fight tonight.

Long video on Shane vs. Undertaker, the same one from Raw.

Dolph Ziggler/Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens/The Miz

Sami and Miz get things going as we have to hear about the other three guys being added to the Intercontinental Title match for the sake of making it way more of a mess than it needs to be. Sami works on the arm to start (there’s a safe idea) before it’s off to Ziggler for a rollup. Owens: “WE GET IT! YOU WENT TO COLLEGE!” Dolph’s headlock slows things down but Miz puts a knee into his ribs to take over.

Owens comes in and eats a dropkick, only to run away from Zayn. He teases leaving again but this time Miz will have nothing to do with that and grabs Kevin’s arm, allowing Zayn to get in a dive to take them out. Some elbows to the head have Owens in trouble and that’s about it for this dream match. I would say save it for Wrestlemania but apparently we wanted a seven way ladder match including a guy who has won one match in nearly two years. Ziggler comes in and gets stomped in the corner before a catapult puts him on the floor.

We take a break and come back with Ziggler blocking the backsplash with the only counter that people use for that move. The hot tag brings in Sami for his running clotheslines and a high cross body to Miz. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets two as everything breaks down. Owens breaks up the Helluva Kick and a victory roll gets two on Miz. Both guys are down but now it’s time for Owens to walk out, only to have Sin Cara, Zack Ryder and Stardust stop him. Back in and Miz gives Owens a Skull Crushing Finale, setting up a superkick and Helluva Kick for the pin on Miz at 13:57.

Rating: C+. That scene with Ryder, Cara and Stardust coming out to stop Owens from leaving sums up every problem this title match has. If for whatever reason we can’t have Zayn vs. Owens, the best solution is to just add Miz and Ziggler to the mix. I’m not wild on it but it’s as good of a story as we can get. The other three can’t even get into a match on Smackdown and really do come off as people just there for the sake of being there. As usual, if you can eliminate something entirely and tell the same story, they’re really not necessary.

Post match Stardust comes in with the Queen’s Crossbow to Zayn. Ryder and Cara come in for the big brawl and it’s Ryder of all people standing tall.

Recap of Roman Reigns vs. HHH/Stephanie on Raw.

Roman Reigns vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

Reigns comes through the entrance again. Bubba immediately hits the floor to yell at the fans which is why he’s such a great heel. Back in and a Superman Punch sends Ray right back out to the floor. The brawl heads outside and Ray is in even more trouble as Reigns slams him into the table over and over for a DQ at 1:52.

D-Von’s save attempt earns him a Superman Punch and some steps to the shoulder. Reigns spears Bubba for good measure.

Goldust is painting his face in the bathroom when R-Truth comes in to call him partner. They’re still not partners but Goldust denies coming down to help him on Monday. Somehow Truth knows that Goldust sleeps without clothes on so Goldust paints NO on Truth’s forehead. Truth looks in the mirror. “ON! IT’S ON!”

The Lucha Dragons are in the back to talk about how they can leave Wrestlemania with a title each. Cara leaves and Ryback comes in to talk about how much bigger and stronger he is than Kalisto. He can bench press Kalisto with one arm and ate that much weight for breakfast this morning. Ryback deserves the Wrestlemania spotlight and Kalisto can settle for a flashlight. Kalisto says he’ll win and leaves.

Tyler Breeze vs. AJ Styles

AJ starts with his striking sequence to send Breeze outside, setting up a springboard forearm. Breeze, who is announced for the Andre battle royal, knees AJ in the face but his superplex is broken up. Another Phenomenal Forearm is enough to pin Breeze at 2:03.

Here are Brock and Heyman to wrap things up. Heyman cuts off the speech by saying that his name is Paul Heyman and this is your main event of the evening. Brock is going to be your Wrestlemania moment, just like when he conquered the Streak. That still gets people to boo. That brings Heyman to the no holds barred street fight at Wrestlemania, which means Dean can use anything he can get his hands on against BROCK LESNAR.

It can be a chair, a table or a kendo stick but it won’t be enough. Now we have Mick Foley and Terry Funk handing Dean various weapons to use against Lesnar too. To shoot from the hip a bit, the only reason Funk and Foley are still alive is because Heyman’s prayers continue to go unanswered. What Ambrose doesn’t understand is that if Dean can get his hands on something, Brock can get his hands on as well. However, Brock can also get his hands on Dean and that’s just going to end badly.

Heyman invites Dean out to fight right now but he gets the Wyatt Family (minus Harper) instead. Brock seems to like the idea of being surrounded but here’s Dean to interrupt. Lesnar gets in a quick suplex to Rowan as Dean gets in, only to have Strowman take Brock’s head off with a clothesline. Dean’s distraction lets Brock suplex Strowman (first time for that I believe) before beating Lesnar down with the kendo stick. That’s fine with Brock who pops up and gives him an F5 to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t great here but this was all about helping to set the stage for Wrestlemania. Things are really starting to shape up for the big night and they’re doing a better job of setting it up than they did last year. There are still some major issues on the pay per view of course but they’re doing what they can to fix some of them as fast as they can. This was a good enough building show and that’s exactly what it needed to be.

Results

Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Small package

Sheamus b. Kofi Kingston – Brogue Kick

Usos b. Ascension – Double superkick to Viktor

Sami Zayn/Dolph Ziggler b. Kevin Owens/The Miz – Helluva Kick to Miz

Bubba Ray Dudley b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns sent him into the announcers’ table

AJ Styles b. Tyler Breeze – Phenomenal Forearm

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: March 17, 2016
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mauro Ranallo, Byron Saxton

This is one of the three final episodes before Wrestlemania XXXII in April and things are….interesting. This past Monday saw the return of Roman Reigns, who showed some of the fire that made him a success near the end of the year. The question now though is how much of that will stick around and how much will be a return to his not so successful form. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Reign returning to attack HHH, resulting in the champ needing six staples to close the gash in his head.

Here’s Reigns, again down the ramp which seems to be his new norm, to open things up. The fans aren’t sure what to think of him to start but says that footage shows what HHH gets for running his mouth. Reigns believes in the big fight, which is what knocked HHH into next week. It’s a good thing that HHH isn’t in the building tonight because Reigns would beat him again just as badly. Not because he wants to you see, but because he can. At Wrestlemania in Dallas, Reigns is going to hold the title over HHH’s body because he can and HHH needs to believe that.

This wasn’t a great promo but above all else it was short. That’s been Roman’s big downfall: they leave him out there for so long that Reigns gets lost because he’s just not that great of a talker. However, showing how strong of a fighter he is on Monday and then having him talk about it here in a three minute speech is the best path they can go with. If they can just avoid him being booed out of the building (remember that the next two Raw’s are in Philadelphia and New York) before Wrestlemania, things will be as good as they can be.

We look back at Chris Jericho splitting up the partnership with AJ Styles and then getting laid out by Styles on Monday (in what was apparently an improvised segment due to the Neville injury).

Styles says the fans can chant for whoever they want because this is WWE. This Monday felt so good….and here’s Kevin Owens. Kevin thinks AJ sounds just like Sami Zayn with all this whining. Maybe they can have their own show on the WWE Network where they hold each other and cry. AJ talks about how Owens is just like Jericho with their insecurity. Owens says the easiest answer would be they’re both from Canada but that’s not what matters. It’s the Intercontinental Title that really matters but AJ thinks it’s more important that they’re having a match tonight (BIG pop for that).

The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ranallo brings up the horribly tired Battle of Ohio idea for this match. Ziggler takes it to the mat for an early front facelock but Miz reverses into a small package. They fight over headlocks because there’s almost nothing left for these two to fight over these days. Ranallo keeps up the lame references by bringing up Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell. Of all the people Trump is associated with and feuding with these days, the best he’s got it Rosie O’Donnell?

Ziggler pulls Miz to the mat again and drops some elbows but gets sent chest first into the buckle as we take a break. Back with Miz getting two off a top rope ax handle and slapping on a body scissors. Ziggler fights up again with his running clotheslines and a neckbreaker, followed by a sunset flip for two. He takes too much time getting up though and it’s time for the Figure Four. Ziggler is quickly in the ropes though and a superkick puts Miz away at 10:40.

Rating: C. These guys are on that dreaded list of people I do not need to see fight ever again. If the Battle of Ohio is really the best thing they can come up with for a quick story then it’s clear that they need to move on with both guys. Hopefully the two of them are in the battle royal instead of squeezed into the Intercontinental Title match as has been rumored as neither is interesting enough for that spot at the moment.

We look at Ryback challenging Kalisto for a US Title match at Wrestlemania.

Kalisto accepted the challenge.

We look back at Mick Foley giving Dean Ambrose the barbed wire baseball bat.

Earlier today, Dean was here in his hometown of Cincinnati and loves every bit of it. Brock Lesnar may have been trained to fight in the UFC but on the streets of this city, every day is Wrestlemania because you fight every day and night. Pressure like that makes diamonds and Brock better be ready because nothing hurts like an education. I love these on location promos as they give things such a sense of importance and realism.

Jackie Moore Hall of Fame video.

Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Goldust

D-Von gets a table out just a few seconds after the bell, drawing a very nice reaction from the crowd. The distraction lets Bubba send Goldust into the buckle a few times, all while calling Goldust a freak. After Bubba shouts about Goldust having face paint just like the Usos, Goldust starts a comeback with right hands, only to run into an elbow to the jaw. Goldust hammers away in the corner and scores with the bulldog for two. A quick D-Von distraction pays off though and Bubba kicks Goldust in the face for the pin at 3:23.

Rating: D. What are you expecting from a match that seems designed to just set up the Usos vs. Dudley Boyz match? Goldust and Bubba Ray Dudley being around in 2016 is some combination of amazing and sad, though the fact that they certainly didn’t embarrass themselves out there is a good sign.

Post match R-Truth comes out for the save but gets beaten down as well. The Usos come out for the real save.

Here’s Charlotte (dressing more like Nikki Bella every day) for a face to face to face meeting with Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks. Charlotte gets right to the point by saying she’s known the two of them (not out here yet) for most of her adult life. They’ve done it all together but she wouldn’t be standing here today if not for the two of them. Becky comes out on her own and Charlotte isn’t sure what to think of it, so here’s Sasha a few seconds later. Well that was kind of pointless. Charlotte: “You finally showed up.” Sasha: “Child please, I am not on your schedule.”

Charlotte brings up their past in NXT and tells a story about calling her dad when she met the two of them. Ric thought they sounded like the Horsemen but Charlotte thought they were the Horsewomen. Over time she started to accept the idea but now she owes Ric an apology because these two could NEVER be the Horsewomen.

That’s enough for Becky, who goes on a rant about how you can call her whatever she wants but at Wrestlemania she’s going to be the one ripping Charlotte’s arm off and becoming Divas Champion. Sasha says sorry boo boos (yes boo boos) but she’s the one who took the NXT Women’s Title from Charlotte and the only one who hasn’t been beaten in WWE. Charlotte watches as Becky and Sasha argue over jewelry but they quickly go after the champ, sending her running off. Another good segment here as I want to see the match more than I did coming in.

Here’s New Day for Kofi Kingston’s match but they’re swinging trash bags. After looking at a video of their beatdown, Woods says they’re fine after that beatdown because they’ve been eating their Bootyo’s. Now some people might think that they couldn’t do anything after a beating like that, which sends Big E. into a perfect 1980s style over the top promo that you see when someone is pretending to be pretending to be a wrestler.

That brings them to the trash bags, which represent a member of the League of Nations each. Each one is punted out of the ring, accompanied by a good imitation of each member. The challenge for a three on two Tag Team Title match is accepted for Wrestlemania, which certainly should be interesting to see.

Kofi Kingston vs. King Barrett

Kofi takes him straight into the corner for a one man Unicorn Stampede, meaning it’s time for a seven man staredown as we take a way too early break. Back with Kofi firing off the kicks to the legs but getting distracted by the League, allowing Barrett to kick him in the face to take over.

We get some clubbing (yes clubbing I say) forearms to the back for two, only to have Kofi come back with a spinning cross body for the same. Winds of Change is countered with a backflip into a DDT (sweet move) but Woods and Del Rio get on the apron. Everything breaks down on the floor and it’s Kofi grabbing a rollup (and trunks) for the pin on Barrett at 7:51.

Rating: C. Another simple match here and it’s amazing to see how easily New Day is slipping into their face role. They haven’t officially turned yet but you know it’s going to come the night after Wrestlemania at the very latest. Kofi is so smooth in the ring and I’d love to see him get a strong singles run after New Day breaks up one day.

Dean is in a bar and talks how much you grow up here. You start thinking about the fights you’ve won and the fights you’ve lost, but above all else you start thinking about fighting for pride. At Wrestlemania, he’s bringing Cincinnati with him and Lesnar better be ready.

Long recap of Vince, Shane and Undertaker from Raw.

The Social Outcasts are sitting on the apron and promise to be the first team to win the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal together. That idea lasts all of three seconds (the amount of time between Dallas saying it and Slater starting to talk) before they argue over who will be winning.

Cue Dean with a kendo stick to hammer all four of them (drawing your required Cincinnati Reds reference), sending the Outcasts running. Dean has heard that Brock is going to be in Boston next week for Smackdown because everyone knew he wasn’t coming to Cincinnati. If Brock is going to be here next week, Dean will be right there with him for the fight that Brock walked away from on Raw. More good stuff here.

AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens

Non-title. We start fast with AJ’s drop down into the dropkick as Lawler makes fun of Ranallo calling everything AJ does phenomenal. The springboard forearm is countered into a gutbuster and the backsplash crushes Styles. We take a break and come back with fighting out of Chinlock City and blocking another backsplash with raised knees. Owens: “Ranallo shut up! I can hear you from here you idiot!”

AJ gets in the running forearm to a seated Owens and sends him outside for a slingshot forearm. Back in and Owens’ package piledriver slam (called a Blue Thunder Bomb by Ranallo, which isn’t exactly what I would call the move) gets two but AJ kicks him in the head. They slug it out with AJ getting the best of it until he misses a spinning backfist and eats a superkick.

The Pop Up Powerbomb is countered and AJ actually torture racks him into a spinning powerbomb for two. I always love seeing a surprise move like that as it keeps you from getting bored with the same stuff over and over. AJ heads up but has to knock Owens off the top, only to have Jericho come out to break up the Phenomenal Forearm. Styles takes WAY too long getting back inside and it’s the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin at 11:43.

Rating: B. This was getting really good until the ending but that worked well too. Styles losing is fine here as Jericho cost him the fall to make sure it wasn’t clean. They’ve done a very good job of making AJ look like a big deal and it’s even better when Owens gets a nice win as well. Really nice main event here and I’d love to see them get more time in a big match later.

Post match Jericho gives AJ a Codebreaker and mocks the AJ STYLES chants to end the show. Jericho continues to nail this heel run like he hasn’t in years.

Overall Rating: B-. YES. This is the kind of show that WWE has been needing for a long time now as it actually felt like they were setting up something special at Wrestlemania. You had nearly every match get a strong build (save for the Cell and they’re messing that enough up on Raw every single week) and now I want to see more of the matches than I did coming in. This might not have been the highest quality show but it was an important one given how horrible the build has been to this point.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. The Miz – Superkick

Bubba Ray Dudley b. Goldust – Big boot

Kofi Kingston b. King Barrett – Rollup with a handful of trunks
Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles – Pop Up Powerbomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: March 10, 2016
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mauro Ranallo, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Roadblock and the big story for this week seems to be the main roster debut (well full time debut at least) of Sami Zayn. Tonight we’ll get to see Zayn and his longtime rival Kevin Owens together on MizTV, possibly to set up something between the two (or three) of them at Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Tonight it’s Dean Ambrose/Dolph Ziggler/Usos vs. the Wyatt Family.

MizTV gets things going this week with Miz showing us a clip of Zayn running out to save Neville from an Owens apron bomb. Sami comes out first and thankfully it’s still to that rocking Worlds Apart theme. There’s just something about that Sami Zayn entrance that makes me smile and you know it’s going to be something fun. The OLE chants cut Miz off to start but he eventually asks who Sami Zayn is.

Sami talks about doing this for fourteen years and being in NXT for the last few years but Miz cuts him off by actually yelling CUT. Miz wants to hear about Sami’s relationship with Kevin Owens. The story goes back thirteen years with both of them starting in Montreal. They’ve been linked together as friends, tag partners, opponents and enemies over the years and now they’re here as pure enemies. Sami isn’t sure how we got here but Owens delayed his main roster arrival with that shoulder injury.

That means it’s time for Owens to come out and Sami looks sad. Kevin says what he did to Sami back in NXT was what was best for his career. Sami was signed two years before Owens but Owens was on Raw a year before Sami, so who was wrong? What happened at the Royal Rumble was personal though because Owens was the victim there. Zayn gets right to the point: he’s here to stay and wants that Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania.

The fans want to see them fight right now but Owens isn’t so keen on the idea. Kevin doesn’t think Sami belongs in the same ring and goes to walk, only to run right into Neville. Owens has someone else to worry about because Neville thinks that Intercontinental Title would look fine around his waist. That means it’s time for Miz to say it’s his show and that he deserves a title shot of his own. Sami and Miz start going at it and we’re ready for a tag match after the break.

Sami Zayn/Neville vs. Kevin Owens/The Miz

Miz takes Sami down by the arm to start but Zayn spins up and grabs the arm to take over. It’s off to Neville for an arm wringer of his own until Miz drives him into the corner for the tag to Owens. The champ gets hurricanranaed down and we get Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens for the first time in WWE. That lasts all of three seconds though as Owens bails to the corner and it’s back to Miz for another armbar. That fits Owens as a coward very well so all is right so far.

Neville splashes Miz but gets low bridged to the floor as we take a break. Back with Owens taking Neville back into the corner for the tag off to Miz and some stomping. We hit the chinlock for a good while before the Reality Check gets a near fall. Owens demands a tag but has to settle for watching Neville send Miz out to the floor. The hot tag brings in Zayn for the running clotheslines and a tornado DDT for Miz. Now we get the tag to Owens….or at least we would if he didn’t walk out on the match. Miz takes the exploder suplex into the corner and the Helluva Kick gives Sami the pin at 11:44.

Rating: C+. That was fine and it’s cool to see Owens and Zayn go from the indies and make it all the way here, likely followed by a title match at Wrestlemania. Unfortunately it seems like we’re going to see them fighting with a bunch of other people because the idea of a singles match for the title has been long forgotten for whatever reason. These four would be fine but you can almost guarantee Ziggler and a few others being added. Hopefully there aren’t any ladders involved but that seems to be a Wrestlemania tradition these days.

Rock Wrestlemania video.

R-Truth goes to see Goldust in the bathroom but Goldust doesn’t need a helping hand. Goldust isn’t interested so Truth hands him toilet paper. It’s still no though.

Long recap of HHH and Dean from Monday.

Brie Bella vs. Summer Rae

Rematch from Raw with Lana sitting on the announcers’ table for commentary. Lana tells Saxton to shut up because she’s watching the match as Brie is taken to the floor and sent into the barricade. Back in and we hit the cobra clutch while Lana is asked for her definition of a true woman. Lana: “Look at me.” Brie comes back with a middle rope dropkick and the YES Kicks, followed by the YES Lock for the submission at 2:14.

Post match Brie shouts at Lana but goes to knee Summer instead, allowing Lana to give her a second Bella Buster.

Video on Shane McMahon’s in ring career. It’s the same one from Raw.

Here’s Chris Jericho, carrying a Y2AJ shirt over his shoulder, to explain his actions on Monday. The shirt is sat in front of a trashcan as Jericho asks if this is what he gets. The fans are booing him and choosing to cheer AJ Styles. Jericho did what he did on Monday because of those chants. They made him feel like a piece of trash that belongs in this can because he’s still the best in the world at what he does. Jericho lists off his accomplishments, including perhaps the most impressive: he hasn’t been hurt in seventeen years.

After all that though, the fans still chant for AJ Styles. Even after last Monday’s classic, the fans were still chanting for AJ. Jericho has delivered classic after classic in seventeen years and he can’t get a cheer. He’s seen it time after time: someone comes in and could be the best in the world but then they leave after three months because they’re not the real thing. AJ has been here for six weeks (that doesn’t seem possible) and the steam is still coming off his WWE coffee.

Jericho has seen this before and he’s going to be standing around laughing because AJ is going to be just another bust. The fans chant for AJ so Jericho holds up the shirt. Y2AJ was something special but the fans ruined it by chant for AJ. It’s all their fault so the shirt is set on fire because it’s all over for AJ. Lawler: “See this is symbolism Byron.” Jericho mocks the AJ Styles chants as the flames keep coming up. Really, really good stuff here and I’m wanting to see the match now. Well done.

Of note here, the spoilers said that AJ came out here but Ascension of all people cut him off so Jericho could escape. I was wondering how that would make sense on TV but they didn’t bother showing it.

Big Boss Man Hall of Fame video. Godfather continues to be the most out of place name in a class in years.

Lucha Dragons vs. King Barrett/Sheamus

Sheamus and Kalisto get things going with the big man offering some very rude applause. A hurricanrana puts Sheamus down and it’s off to Cara as the dropkicks get going. Lawler thinks it’s a matter of time because bigger is always better. The monkey flip into the splash sends Sheamus out to the floor and the Lucha Dragons dance gets on Lawler’s nerves. We see Ryback watching from the back as Sheamus punches Kalisto in the ribs to take over. Kalisto gets sent outside and we take a break.

Back with Barrett pounding on Kalisto in the corner before it’s off to a chinlock. Sheamus comes in with a running knee to the ribs and a powerslam. Lawler calls Kalisto a gamer but only means he plays video games like WWE2K16. I figured that’s where he was going but it made me chuckle anyway.

Kalisto avoids a charge in the corner to send Sheamus into the post and it’s hot tag to Cara. Everything speeds up and a springboard back elbow drops Barrett. Cara’s standing Lionsault drops Sheamus and a dive takes him out again. The Swanton is loaded up but Rusev shoves him off the top, setting up the Bull Hammer to give Barrett the pin at 10:43.

Rating: C. Well at least the champion didn’t get pinned. This is such a strange dynamic as you have the Dragons as a worthless team but Kalisto was white hot there for a little bit. However, much like so many other things, Alberto Del Rio has crippled whatever momentum he might have had. The matches were fine but Del Rio is such a heat killer. It also didn’t help that Kalisto got pinned in so many meaningless tag matches while he was champion because that’s how WWE rolls. They wouldn’t want him to get hot or something. I mean, he’s just the US Champion after all.

Ryback still thinks that two little men can’t beat two big men. The Dragons tried but not all men are created equal.

Last year’s main event is a Wrestlemania moment.

Very long recap of Vince and Shane from Raw.

The Usos talk about watching the Dudley Boyz twenty years ago as children but now they’re grown men who don’t respect them. Dolph Ziggler comes in and says he isn’t worried about the repercussions from insulting Stephanie on Monday. Random but ok. Dean joins them to say they’re ready for the Wyatts.

Wyatt Family vs. Dolph Ziggler/Usos/Dean Ambrose

Harper and Ambrose get things going with Luke clotheslining him down and stopping to pose. The good guys take him into the corner but the Usos’ wristlocks don’t quite work on someone as strong as Harper. Back with Harper stomping on Jey in the corner but another wristlock is enough to bring in Ziggler. That’s something WWE really needs to work on: so many people use the same basic moves like that wristlock or a kick to the thigh or a superkick. Mix that stuff up as I’m sure there are enough moves to go around.

Ziggler misses a Stinger Splash in the corner and it’s off to Bray for the real beating. Strowman comes in for a big forearm to the chest, setting up a chinlock from Harper. The Fameasser is countered into a powerbomb but Dolph rolls through into a sunset flip for two. The hot tag brings in Jey as things speed up, which unfortunately isn’t getting the crowd into the match.

A good looking superkick puts Rowan in the corner and we get stereo Umaga attacks followed by the double dives over the top. Jey’s Superfly Splash hits knees though and it’s off to Ambrose for the real hot tag. The standing elbow drop gets two on Erick and we hit the parade of secondary finishers. Ziggler can’t superkick Strowman down but Dean sidesteps a charge and gives Rowan Dirty Deeds for the pin at 13:14.

Rating: C+. This started slowly but picked up a lot near the end to help things out a lot. I don’t often notice this but the crowd really didn’t care here. Can you blame them though, as apparently they had four matches on the entire show? I’m a sucker for parades of finishers though and Dean getting the pin over someone not named Bray was the right finish.

Overall Rating: B. Four good to watchable (with the Divas) matches and some storyline advancement with Sami vs. Owens gives me all I need to see on a Thursday night. The best thing Smackdown can do is give a focus to the midcard acts instead of the World Title and McMahon stories and that’s what we got here. I liked the show a lot more than Raw, though I wonder how much of that is due to being able to fast forward through the recaps. There really shouldn’t be that many on a given Smackdown but the McMahons drive business around here, no matter how absurd the story is.

Results

Sami Zayn/Neville b. Kevin Owens/The Miz – Helluva Kick to Miz

Brie Bella b. Summer Rae – YES Lock

King Barrett/Sheamus b. Lucha Dragons – Bull Hammer to Cara

Dean Ambrose/Usos/Dolph Ziggler b. Wyatt Family – Dirty Deeds to Rowan

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