10 Reunion
Date: August 2, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s a non-PPV month which means it’s time for another One Night Only. The theme this time is a celebration of the first ten years of the company, presumably because 10 Reunion sounds better than 11 Reunion. In other words, it’s more of the same idea but with regular matches instead of anything themed. Let’s get to it.

The opening video shows a few clips from the early days then jumps ahead four years to Angle debuting. Now it’s 2010 with Hogan debuting and the Band walking out. We get Angle headbutting Joe and various things happening to Abyss, plus the XXX vs. AMW cage match (Elix Skipper continues to amaze me) and various other moments.

We get a music video, set to a song about taking it higher and higher, of highlights from the X-Division with a focus on the old weekly PPV days. Nice stuff here.

Kenny King vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Petey Williams

It’s not enough that I have to watch these things on Impact but now I have to be bored by them on the PPVs too. Oh joy. It would seem more appropriate to have Dutt vs. Williams here as King wasn’t around for much of the first ten years, if any at all. Also spare telling me that he was around in 2006. Anyway Petey seems to be the crowd favorite here but both guys send him down in the corner. Sonjay sends King to the floor but Petey grabs him in a wristlock.

Off to some Rings of Saturn into a rollup for two on Dutt but now King is back in. Both Dutt and Kenny are put in 619 position but King gets up before taking a dropkick to the back. Sonjay hits a running forearm to Sonjay in the corner and bulldogs him down onto King for two. Kenny takes both guys down and sends Dutt to the floor. A legdrop crushes Williams for two and Dutt is dropkicked back to the floor. Off to a crossface chickenwing on Petey but King is no Bob Backlund so Petey fires off some elbows to escape.

Petey comes back with some chops but Sonjay has to come back in to break up the Royal Flush. Sonjay shoves Williams down to avoid a superplex but King crotches Dutt on the top. King is clotheslined to the floor and Williams snaps off a slingshot hurricanrana. Back in and Dutt hits a quick hurricanrana on Williams but King comes in to put Dutt down with snake eyes. We hit the chinlock on Sonjay followed by a running knee to the ribs for two. Williams comes back in to drop both guys but gets caught in a Sonjay small package for another near fall.

King and Williams are sent to the floor and Sonjay hits a big dive to take both of them out. Dutt seems to be the only one the fans like but King whips him into the barricade to take over again. Petey and Kenny get back in with Williams hitting the slingshot Codebreaker for two. Taz says Petey looks like Peter Boyle (“Not that Peter Boyle!” Thank goodness Taz is back….I guess.) as Dutt breaks up the Canadian Destroyer on King.

A slingshot legdrop to the back of Petey’s head gets two for Sonjay but Kenny kicks Dutt in the back of the head. Sonjay breaks up another Destroyer attempt and dropkicks both guys down but misses the moonsault double stomp. The Destroyer connects on Sonjay but King comes in with the Royal Flush on Petey for the pin.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t bad but MAN this went too long. It was obvious that King was winning as he’s the only guy currently on the active roster and Heaven forbid we don’t want the reunion show to be about the past right? This match wasn’t bad but it didn’t need to run over twelve minutes like it did here. That’s too long for a spot fest with no story.

We’re going to be counting down the Top Ten moments in TNA history from Slammiversary in 2012.

10 is Jarrett vs. Raven with Sabu debuting to prevent Jarrett from winning the title. That doesn’t sound like a top ten moment to me.

9. Hulk Hogan debuts and won’t rejoin the Band.

Video on Gail Kim, including her beating Awesome Kong for the first Knockouts title in a good match. We also get a video on Velvet Sky, talking about her being bullied as teenager. I still have a BIG problem believing that an athletic chick who looks like that was bullied a lot in high school. These two traded the title a few times and tonight it’s a grudge match.

Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky

Tenay can’t convince Taz to say let the pigeons loose again. They get into a hip shaking contest to start until Velvet dropkicks her out to the floor. Back in and another dropkick puts Gail down for two and a bulldog gets the same. Velvet pounds away in the corner but is dropped face first on the buckle to change momentum. A clothesline gets two for Kim as Taz accuses the referee of cheating.

Velvet comes back with forearms of her own and Gail waves at Taz for no apparent reason. Gail takes Velvet down as Taz compares Velvet to the Berzerker John Nord. Velvet’s knee is bent around Gail’s neck as Taz makes jokes about the referee selling illegal DVDs. Velvet makes her comeback with some clotheslines and a headscissors followed by a bad spear for two. Eat Defeat is countered into In Yo Face to give Velvet the pin.

Rating: D+. The match was ok and it’s nice to see two girls who were actually important to TNA over the years, but you expect more from a ten year reunion show match. The same is true of the opener. That’s the best we’re going to get to celebrate the signature divisions of the company? The match wasn’t bad but it’s nothing memorable at all.

8. Kurt Angle moonsaults Mr. Anderson at Lockdown, mostly missing.

7. Joe vs. Daniels vs. AJ in the Unbreakable three way. That should be higher up. Like WAY higher up.

We’re also getting the intro on each individual moment which is a waste of time. Gee I wonder why they’re doing that.

Joseph Park says his time here has been unbelievable. He’s reached the bar he set for himself and is proud to have beaten Joey Ryan. He’s only been here for a year but his brother Chris (You know, Abyss?) was here for over seven years. Tonight, Joseph will take his place in the gauntlet match and who knows what’s going to happen. Maybe at TNA 20 Park can be the star.

Gauntlet Battle Royal

Man TNA LOVES them some gauntlet matches. Basically this is a catch all mini Royal Rumble. Johnny Devine is #1 and Shark Boy is #2. Devine takes him down and pounds away with stomps to the ribs. After that, Devine stomps away even more before trying a double jump moonsault and TOTALLY botching it, falling off the middle rope onto the back of his head a good two feet from Shark Boy. Sharky throws him out to end Devine’s embarrassment.

Chase Stevens of the Naturals is #3 and is still as generic as ever. He pounds on Sharky for awhile until Shark Boy comes back with a Thesz Press. He’s a Stone Cold ripoff remember. Cassidy Riley, a former Raven tribute character, is #4. Seriously, these are the best guys you could find? Riley mostly misses a Lionsault on Shark Boy and covers like the nitwit that he is. Stevens and Riley are both guys in trunks with nothing distinguishing about them, making this match feel even more dull. They double team Shark Boy down and yell at the crowd, who likely doesn’t know who they are.

Here’s Robbie E at #5 because we don’t have enough heels in there already. Stevens and Riley double team him as well before pairing off with the comedy guys. Sharky hits a Dead Sea Drop on Stevens but Robbie knocks them all down and stomps around in a circle. Jesse Godderz is #5 and I groan out loud.

At this point it’s very clear that these themes mean absolutely nothing and that these matches are taking place to fill in time on a PPV they know people aren’t going to buy. TNA may not be the biggest promotion of all time, but there’s an actual history to them that they could present a good show from. To throw out a few no names like Riley and Stevens along with some comedy jobbers isn’t a tribute. It’s a way to con TNA fans out of a few bucks and fill in time on a show so you can’t be accused of flat out lying.

Anyway, Jesse and Robbie yell at each other long enough to have Riley and Stevens jump them from behind. Taz talks about the Heavenly Bodies for no apparent reason as Bromance eliminates Riley. Here’s Matt Morgan at #7 in perhaps his last TNA appearance. He immediately puts out Stevens but Bromance tries to double team him. Shark Boy bites Jesse and Morgan eliminates both Jesse and Robbie to get us down to two. Shark Boy can’t hurt Matt and gets lifted in the air in a choke as Mr. Anderson is #8.

Morgan knocks Shark Boy into the corner as Anderson offers a truce with the big man. Shark Boy hangs on in an elimination attempt but Anderson stomps him down onto the apron. Morgan finally turns on Anderson and chokes him in the corner until Johnny Swinger is #9. He fires away at the stars until Anderson takes over on him and the match slows down AGAIN.

Joseph Park is #10 to give us a final group of Park, Morgan, Sharky, Swinger and Anderson. Joseph fires away on everyone not named Shark Boy until Anderson pokes him in the eye. Swinger and Anderson team up to try to eliminate Park but Anderson dumps Swinger. Morgan kicks Sharky out and we’re down to the three biggest names. Park is double teamed but Morgan doesn’t want Anderson helping him.

Anderson charges at Park but gets low bridged to the floor. As usual Park is shocked that it worked and walks into a discus lariat from Morgan. Matt tries to throw him out in the corner but Park punches his way out. The Carbon Footprint misses and Morgan crotches himself on the ropes. Park pounds away and runs Morgan over with a shoulder block. There’s the middle rope splash and apparently you win by pinfall in the final two. Morgan kicks out and hits the Carbon Footprint for the pin.

Rating: D-. This match felt like it was about three days long and the ending was nothing of note. Again, there were ten people in this match and most of them were either jobbers or comedy guys plus Anderson and Morgan. This is probably going to be the longest match of the night and it was ridiculously boring. This show has been terribly uninteresting so far and we’re just over an hour into it.

6. Hogan loses to Sting at Bound For Glory 2011 and turns face. It was so nice of him to put over that young Sting kid.

Bad Influence is ready for Team 3D and LAX. Kaz says Team 3D was a great team and LAX is an airport. Team 3D split up and clearly aren’t best friends like Bad Influence so they clearly won’t win. Daniels says they’re the present of tag team wrestling and west coast boogeymen. Good stuff here as always.

Video on the tag team division over the years.

Team 3D vs. LAX vs. Bad Influence

Now THIS is more like it. Team 3D and LAX at least are famous tag teams and Bad Influence has been around for a long time in the company. We start with Homicide vs. Bully, who won the world title about a week before this was filmed. Bully pounds him down with ease but Homicide comes back with right hands to the jaw. Kaz tags himself in to work on Homicide and it’s a feeling out process.

Homicide takes him down but Kaz nips up, only to be taken into the LAX corner. It’s off to Hernandez for a front suplex before it’s right back to Homicide who gets popped in the jaw by Daniels. Hernandez gets the tag and helps Homicide with some double teaming followed by an overhead choke throw from SuperMex. Kaz finally starts cheating by tripping up Hernandez to give Daniels a breather. It’s off to Kazarian who gets two via an elbow drop to Hernandez before bringing Daniels back for a countered double suplex on SuperMex.

Bully punches the now legal Homicide from the apron but we stick with LAX vs. Bad Influence. Daniels drives Homicide down with two feet to the chest for two before offering either Dudley a tag. Homicide gets in a shot to Chris’ ribs and D-Von tags himself in. A headbutt gets two on Homicide and it’s off to Bully for a big elbow. D-Von comes back in for a nerve hold and a clothesline followed by a Spinarooni of all things.

A release Rock Bottom gets two on Homicide and it’s off to Kaz. Homicide ducks a clothesline and it’s FINALLY off to Hernandez to clean house. In an impressive power display, Hernandez puts Kaz and Daniels on his shoulders at the same time for a kneeling backbreaker. That guy is scary strong. Everything breaks down and Hernandez dives over the top rope to take out Kaz and D-Von. Homicide hits the Gringo Cutter to Daniels from the top but a blind tag brings in D-Von for the 3D on Homicide and the pin.

Rating: C+. This was MUCH better than the rest of the show so far as it actually had some interesting teams in there. The earlier matches have been ok but the people in them haven’t sparked any interest. You had to have Team 3D win here given their current status so I have few issues here. The show needed a match like this to save it from the spiral it was caught in.

5. Christian comes to TNA.

4. Kurt Angle comes to TNA and gets in a fight with TNA’s top guy Samoa Joe. That should be MUCH higher.

Austin Aries can’t believe he has to face Jeff Hardy. He was hoping to fight someone more exciting as he’s already fought Jeff Hardy over and over. The problem is he’s never beaten Jeff Hardy. The stakes aren’t all that high here though as it’s just a regular match with no ladders. We’re in the dump of an Impact Zone with all of Hardy’s Creatures of the Night, so of course Hardy is the favorite.

We get a hype video for Bound For Glory 2012 with Hardy vs. Aries to set this up. This doesn’t really work as the video is about Aries saying Hardy isn’t great until he beats Aries, which he did at BFG. We also get clips of Aries winning the title, losing it to Hardy and losing the rematch at Turning Point.

Austin Aries vs. Jeff Hardy

They throw a t-shirt around to start and the fans are completely behind Hardy. Aries scores first with an armdrag and lays out on the turnbuckle. Hardy jumps over him in the corner and drop toeholds Aries into the corner. Austin wants a DQ for some reason but has to settle for jumping over Hardy in the corner, only to be caught in another drop toehold. Hardy drop toeholds him down for a third time and Aries takes a breather on the floor. Make that he’s walking out before charging back in, only to be sent right back to the floor.

Hardy follows up with a running clothesline off the apron but Aries grabs the referee to block a Swanton Bomb. Jeff is crotched on top for two and Aries finally gets to go on offense. We hit an armbar because that’s little more than a rest hold anymore. A jumping elbow gets two for Aries and another from the middle rope gets two more. Aries pounds away in the corner but Jeff fires off right hands of his own, only to miss a charge in the corner.

Aries goes to the middle rope and does Jeff’s dance but a splash only hits knees. Hardy wins another quite slugout and clotheslines Aries down. A basement dropkick puts Aries down for two but he backdrops out of a piledriver. Now Hardy’s middle rope splash hits for two of his own but Aries counters a headscissors to crotch him on the top rope. The brainbuster gets two and Aries is shocked. He heads up top but Hardy rolls away from the 450 and grabs a small package for the quick pin on Aries.

Rating: B. Now THIS is more like it. This was a very good match with both guys working hard to fire up the crowd. Hardy is a big deal in TNA’s history and Aries is…..kind of I guess. Then again I stopped caring about the whole ten year thing an hour ago. Good match here as this show is suddenly on the right track.

3. AJ Styles beats Jerry Lynn twice in a row to become the first X-Division Champion.

2. Hulk Hogan signs with TNA.

Video on James Storm vs. Bobby Roode over the years. I think this is borrowed from the build to Lockdown. This even gets a music video, complete with video from Bound For Glory with the King Mo nonsense.

Bobby Roode vs. James Storm

Feeling out process to start with Storm taking him into the corner for a clean break. They trade hammerlocks before Storm runs Roode over with a shoulder. Storm takes him down with a backdrop but Roode bails to the floor to avoid the Last Call. Back in and Roode sends him over the top but Storm skins the cat and throws Roode to the floor. James hits Roode in the head with a water bottle but gets his throat snapped across the top rope to change control.

Bobby stomps away back in the ring and drops a knee for two before hooking a chinlock. A middle rope blockbuster gets two for Roode and he’s getting frustrated. Roode suplexes Storm down and puts on another chinlock. Storm fights up but gets caught in a sleeper to put him right back down. The arm only falls twice and the comeback is on with Storm suplexing his way out of the hold.

Storm wins a slugout and hits some clotheslines to take over. The corner enziguri and a running neckbreaker gets two for Storm and a top rope hurricanrana gets the same. Back up and Roode hits the big spinebuster for two but the fisherman’s suplex is countered into Closing Time. Roode grabs the rope and blocks a Codebreaker, allowing for a rollup with feet on the ropes to pin Storm.

Rating: B-. This was good stuff for the most part but of course Storm loses again. That’s really all he knows how to do in a big match situation, especially against Roode. It’s a solid match with a solid backstory but it’s not the best match in the world. The problem here is the hatred is gone so it’s almost a nostalgia match at this point.

1. Sting returns in 2006. Just….no. It’s a moment but Angle jumping should have been #1, especially considering that this wasn’t even Sting’s first time in TNA.

Speaking of nostalgia, Samoa Joe is ready to beat Kurt Angle and he wants to do it by knockout.

We recap Angle vs. Joe. Angle debuted in 2006 and challenged the undefeated Samoa Joe to his first match. Joe lost at Genesis, setting up another two matches with Angle winning 2-1. Joe would beat Angle at Lockdown 2008 for the world title so tonight is kind of a rubber match. There was another match at Hard Justice 07 but no one remembers that so we won’t count it.

Samoa Joe vs. Kurt Angle

We even get big match intros for this one. Joe grabs a wristlock to start but Angle counters into a hammerlock. We keep going with the basic feeling out stuff until a shoulder block sends Angle out to the floor. Back in and another shoulder puts Angle on the outside again. Kurt is sent face first into the steps but gets in an elbow to the back as Joe comes back in. This is pretty slow paced stuff so far.

Joe hits a running kick to the chest to put Angle down and there’s the enziguri in the corner for two. A hard kick to Angle’s chest and a knee drop get two more but Angle snaps off the belly to belly to take over. Off to the chinlock for a LONG time until Joe fights up, only to be taken right back down into the chinlock. Joe fights up again and hits a running boot to the chest to put Angle down.

The running backsplash gets two on Angle but he pops up and rolls the Germans. Joe escapes the third with another enziguri but a missed charge in the corner sets up the Angle Slam for two. There’s the ankle lock but Joe rolls through to send Angle face first into the buckle. Angle escapes the MuscleBuster into the ankle lock but Joe pulls him forward into the Koquina Clutch. Angle grabs the leg and puts the ankle lock on for the third time but Joe kicks away and tries the choke but Angle gets underneath the fat man for the Slam and the pin.

Rating: C+. The match was entertaining enough but the spark wasn’t here for this match. Much like the Roode vs. Storm match there’s no real reason for these two to be fighting other than they did before. The submission stuff at the end was good but the rest of the match really didn’t do much of note at all.

A LONG highlight video (as in like 5 minutes) ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The show isn’t bad but the first hour SUCKED. It had me wanting to turn this off and forget about it for a few hours but then the three way tag team match started up and things got WAY better in a hurry. At the same time though, this whole show depends on how you look at it.

If you’re looking for a reunion and the return of a lot of former stars then this is a complete failure. How many people returned here? Homicide, Shark Boy, Swinger, Devine, Stevens, Riley, and arguably Dutt and Williams? So if you stretch, eight people? The biggest name being…..Homicide? Or is it Shark Boy? This felt more like a two year reunion as we repeated some matches from a few years ago and little more. The show (first hour aside) is entertaining but it misses the point it was shooting for by miles.

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Victory Road 2008
Date: July 13, 2008
Location: Reliant Arena, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Don West, Mike Tenay

So this is just another PPV despite what TNA would want you to think. The main event is Joe vs. Booker as we’re in Booker’s home town and Joe has had issues with Booker for awhile. I’m starting to remember these feuds more concretely now so I might actually have some insight. This is also the final round of the World X Cup which is kind of like an Olympics thing TNA did that I never really thought was all that special although there are a lot that do. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about NASA and doing things never before done. Kind of weak but I can live with that. Just what is a Victory Road though?

The set looks like an old Nitro set. I think I like that. Ultimate X is back tonight and there’s a Fan’s Choice match tonight.

JB is outside and we’re asked what we want in the 6 man: falls count anywhere, tables, or full metal mayhem (TNA’s TLC). Polls are open until 11 tonight, which is after the show ends. Brilliance.

Lauren (GORGEOUS) is with BG James who says absolutely nothing of note.

Team Mexico vs. Team Japan vs. Team TNA vs. Team International

Team Mexico – Ultimo Guerrero/Rey Bucanero/Averno
Team Japan – Milano Collection A.T./Masato Yoshima/Puma
Team International – Alex Kozlov/Doug Williams/Tyson Dux
Team TNA – Curry Man/Alex Shelley/Chris Sabin

This is a 12 man four corners elimination match. Coming into this the standings are Team Mexico and Team TNA with three points and the other two with two points. This is for three points. I’ll do what I can to tell the people apart but don’t expect much. Apparently it’s EVERY MEMBER has to be eliminated. I miss Curry Man.

 

Daniels can shake his hips when he has to which is odd to type if nothing else. The Guns are starting to come into their own here and it’s working to an extent. Pretty soon they would be jobbing to big teams rather than just bad ones. Curry and Yoshino start us off.

 

And here are the Guns to beat the tar out of him. West points out how it’s smart to stay on the apron because it’s easier to stay in the match by being out of it, which actually makes sense. All of Team Mexico beats up Williams as this is a total mess at this point due to so many people being in it.

 

Dux goes for a victory roll but Bucanero drops into it kind of like a piledriver (think Owen vs. Bret at Mania X but more like a spike than a rollup if that makes sense) to get us down to eleven which is still too many. Team Japan beats the tar out of Bucanero in some painful looking stuff.

 

We crank the speed up a lot here and Puma is gone. There are two referees here thank goodness. What kind of a name is Milano Collection AT? It sounds like a cookie company or something. Cradle Shock takes him out anyway. That leaves just Yoshima for Team Japan.

 

West points that out and Tenay of course repeats it like 8 seconds later. Shelley hits a SWEET baseball slide on him while he’s in the Tree of Woe. He catches Shelley in an Octopus hold which is one of the most painful holds ever but of course just lets it go since it’s not that important I guess.

Shelley is just beating the heck out of Yoshino. Averno and Yoshino have a very nice high speed sequence as Yoshino is just trying to hang on. Averno gets pinned off a rollup though so we have one down for International and Mexico, two down for Japan, and TNA is intact. Chaos Theory on Sabin is broken up at two.

 

Team Mexico hit a pair of springboard cross bodies which looked great. Williams’ face is great when he gets nailed with a high spot. Guerrero hits a middle rope powerbomb on Curry Man to get us down to seven people left. That’s bearable at least. A crazy double team gets rid of Williams. I know I’m saying a lot really fast here but there’s no transition between a lot of these pins.

 

It’s the Motor City Machine Guns vs. Yoshino vs. Kozlov vs. Guerrero and Bucanero. Guerrero hits a gordbuster off the top for two on Kozlov. Kozlov gets a SWEET Russian Leg Sweep into a Cobra Stretch a la Delirious for the tap from Guerrero. This is FAST. Sabin hits a GREAT hurricanrana into a double super kick on Bucanero to get rid of Team Mexico. That clears things up a lot.

 

Since it’s a multiman match, it’s…actually not a Tower of Doom even though they were in position for one. All four are in the ring for a long time as they’re not even trying to have a coherent match at this point and I can’t really blame them. Sabin does the same run after the other guy thing that DiBiase does but hooks a Diamond Cutter instead of a clothesline. This is rather good stuff.

 

Kozlov goes heel and pulls the referee in front of him before rolling Sabin up and using the ropes to get rid of him. We’re down to Yoshino, Shelley and Kozlov here. Kozlov hits a great enziguri to counter a dive that missed for two on Yoshino. Sick looking move. Kozlov taps to Yoshino and we’re down to one on one.

 

Shelley kicks his head off and Sliced Bread gets two only. I would have bet on that being the end. A PAINFUL looking Tiger Suplex gets two. Shelley just goes OFF and hits something like a reverse Emerald Flowsion for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a hard one to grade as it’s very different from anything most people will be used to. It’s definitely a great match as far as athleticism and showing off, but at the same time nearly half an hour is a bit much. This was definitely good though and a GREAT way to get the crowd fired up.

 

The problem though is what Don West says immediately after the final pin: I’m exhausted from watching that. I think that could be a problem as that’s likely to be the most exciting thing all night long. Hopefully not though.

Updated Standings:

TNA – 6
Japan – 4
International – 3
Mexico – 3

We run down the rest of the card which we’ve already paid for at this point.

We see Booker’s “Homecoming” which is just a tour of his house and how much stuff he has. It’s a nice house if nothing else, but this is nothing but a waste of time.

We recap Angelina vs. Gail which is over Love interfering which allegedly is about her being jealous. I didn’t realize that Beautiful People were two and a half years old.

Angelina Love vs. Gail Kim

Just Love and Sky at this point and a bit more conservative. We hear about how proud Kim is to be a Knockout. Yep, proud enough that she bailed on the company for more money. Velvet interferes early to give Love the advantage. The BP weren’t that good in the ring yet at this point so they had to cheat.

 

Kim gets a Figure Four around the post but doesn’t lean back with it so it just looks weird. This is a pretty basic match but it’s working fairly well I think. Kim busts out a Codebreaker and a neckbreaker for the pin. Kind of anti-climactic ending but what do you expect? Post match Gail avoids a double beatdown.

Rating: D. Just not that good. I know Love is pretty bad in the ring but still this just wasn’t a very good match at all. Love was still getting used to wrestling and while Kim is good, she’s not good enough to carry something like this. Good to see her get the win though which is the right thing.

Lauren and BG James are with the 12 “fans” armed with leather straps for the Fan’s Revenge match tonight.

We recap Lethal vs. Dutt which was supposed to be an homage to the Mega Powers or something like that but it didn’t work at all. So Cal Val being around a lot was nice though.

Jay Lethal vs. Sonjay Dutt

So Lethal is Randy Savage and Dutt is an Indian peace man or something. Dutt gives Val a rose and a card and the fight is on. It’s ALL Lethal to start us off here. Lethal misses a dropkick by about two feet but it’s sold anyway. That makes my head hurt. Tenay says Guru like Gru so it’s very annoying.

 

Dutt goes for a slingshot move. I assume he did at least as that’s what Tenay said. Not like we got to see it or anything. This is fast paced but no one really cares it seems. I mean really, an homage to a 20 year old angle with these two? Seriously? This is mostly Dutt in control but we’re at about look #38 at Val. We get it: she’s hot and concerned.

 

Lethal takes over but Val gets nervous and Dutt nails him. Dutt says he loves Val, and the camera work is KILLING this match. Val gets involved AGAIN and this time it lets Dutt roll Lethal up for the pin. Dutt kisses her hand before leaving. Of course Val would turn on Lethal later as EVERYONE expected.

Rating: D. Like I said, the cameras killed this as they were constantly looking at Val and missing spots because of it. A lot of the time it’s better to just keep the camera on the ring and don’t worry about the hot chick.

 

Either way, this wasn’t going to be that good anyway as they kept doing the same thing (fight a bit, look at Val, lose control because of it) and that was how the match ended. Just an overly long and not that good of a match.

Recap of Beer Money vs. LAX who are feuding because…well because LAX have the belts and Beer Money are challengers. No reasons for the Fans’ Revenge stuff but whatever.

Beer Money and Jackie talk about being mad. Seriously, can someone shoot Jackie?

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. LAX

Jackie stays in the back thank goodness. Ah ok Beer Money beat on LAX in an Impact match where afterwards they tied them up and hit them with belts. I found that on Wikipedia so there you go. That’s the crack TNA recapping staff for you. The fans with the straps are all wearing LAX shirts so you can figure out what’s going to happen here.

 

Hector Guerrero is with them and has a massive sombrero. He looks IDENTICAL to Eddie. So Beer Money are challengers, have no fans on the floor, and don’t have their manager. This is perfectly logical. Roode gets slapped by the straps a lot and runs to Storm. This is SO riveting. Homicide doesn’t get whipped and steals some of Storm’s beer. Why are girls so often called gals? Is one more letter so hard to say?

 

I’ve never seen the genius that Homicide allegedly is in the ring. Storm runs under the ring in kind of a funny bit. Homicide hits Three Amigos to get an Eddie chant going. Beer Money hit a Hart Attack in a nice move. Storm doesn’t let go of the legs and puts on a Boston Crab in a nice move. That was my issue with the Hart Attack: Anvil never really did much. We get a hot tag to Hernandez who cleans house.

 

This just isn’t interesting at all for some reason. It’s just happening and I’m not really caring about it at all. Hernandez’s power is insane at times. He hits a top rope splash on Roode where the referee counts three since Storm misses his cue. They just say it’s two anyway but whatever. A Doomsday Device ending with a Diamond Cutter ends it for LAX.

Rating: D+. So? That’s the only thing I can think of to say. The faces win a match they were supposed to win and there’s no point to this feud anymore. This just wasn’t worth much at all as the straps were all to beat up Beer Money and the whole match just made LAX look even stronger. What’s the point of that? And why didn’t Roode even try to buy some of them off?

More of Booker, this time at the PWA training center where we see some of his guys wrestling. That’s actually kind of cool, but it’s making him look like a face when he’s the heel. Oh right it’s TNA.

We recap Taylor Wilde vs. Awesome Kong, which can be summed up as Wilde was a fan from the crowd that was given a title match and won it. Yeah that’s really all there is to it.

Knockouts Title: Awesome Kong vs. Taylor Wilde

No intro for Kong here either. Makes perfect sense doesn’t it? Yep Wilde is hot. Not sure why I was ever unsure on that one at all. Kong dominates early on as you would expect as the camera work stays bad. Kong hooks a camel clutch of all things which is a move that works for her actually.

 

Wilde is more or less just fighting for all she can but when she grabs Kong by the hair, Kong flicks her into the corner BY THE HAIR. FREAKING OW! Kong takes her head off with a clothesline because she can. Wilde hits an armdrag off the top and is STUNNED yes STUNNED I say when she only gets two. I love idiotic wrestlers.

 

Wilde reverses the Implant Buster into a victory roll to get ANOTHER pin on Kong. Kong and Saed beat her up afterwards….and Abyss makes the save. Uh, reason? Black Hole Slam to Saed and we’re done here.

Rating: C-. At least they kept it short. Wilde was at least something new, but she more or less killed Kong’s character. She was hot though so she worked fine. She’s a good worker though so we need Rosie Lotta Love instead. Anyway, this wasn’t terrible but it’s far from good either.

Booker and Sharmell have dinner at Booker’s restaurant but Booker insists on making sure the portions are small and the drinks are watered down. Booker more or less says he’s the biggest businessman in Houston. Well they’re trying at least.

We get a 10 second look at NASA stuff. WOW.

Here’s a video package on Ultimate X. No commentary needed apparently.

Ultimate X: Kaz vs. Volador Jr. vs. Naruki Doi vs. Daivari

This is for four points apparently, so more or less the winner wins everything, making the entire previous three rounds totally pointless. Daivari is allegedly predictable in this. Ok then. West thinks Kaz is the favorite because of his experience letting him know that he’ll know how to win earlier. YOU CLIMB UP AND GRAB THE FREAKING X! How hard is this? Daivari wisely goes after Kaz’s arm.

 

That makes the most sense here if nothing else. Oh and only Kaz is a face here. We can’t have nice foreigners! West says Kaz is close to being a world champion. Oh the comedy! For about the 1000th time tonight we’re told about being allowed to vote for the stipulation tonight. WE GET IT!

 

Oh and also, great idea on telling us to stop watching your show so we can go get our computers to vote on something on the show later on. In other words, a stipulation for later on in the night is more important than the match you’re watching at the moment. Volador is pretty fun to watch. Kaz manages to get above the X and almost unhooks it but Daivari makes the save.

 

It worked as it’s not like Kaz had a long time up there like in a ladder match so it didn’t look completely ridiculous which is a very nice difference. Also he used his legs to get there so he kept selling the arm from earlier.

 

In a MIND BLOWING spot, Daivari is going across a cable with his back facing the ring so he’s looking up at the ceiling. Kaz climbs up to the metal thing that holds up the cables and JUMPS off of it, crashing down with a clothesline onto Daivari and killing himself in the process. That was INCREDIBLE. It also lets Volador go up and get the X for the win and the Cup.

Rating: B. This was another great high impact battle that worked perfectly for what it was supposed to do. I wasn’t sure who was going to win and I was thinking it would have been Team TNA but a surprise is always good. This was your usual crazy spotfest but it worked quite well.

Team Mexico accepts the trophy.

Booker T has a golf course and apparently is very good, even as good as Tiger Woods.

Frank Trigg is here and is doing commentary.

We recap Angle and the Dudleys vs. Christian, Rhyno and AJ. AJ accidentally married Karen. I know, I know. Just go with it. Kurt is ticked about it as Angle’s wife is sleeping with her husband AJ. See what I have to deal with here?

Kurt Angle/Team 3D vs. AJ Styles/Rhyno/Christian Cage

Team 3D beat up Christian and Rhyno to explain why they’re here. More or less it’s two feuds in one here to fill time. Eh I tend to hate that but I can live with it I guess. Dang AJ needs to be a face again. Angle hides at the broadcast table to jump AJ and it’s Full Metal Mayhem, which more or less is a TLC match where you win by pin.

 

Sweet goodness people is it THAT hard to keep a coherent camera shot? Trigg isn’t that great on commentary and I continue to wonder why he’s here. Angle goes off with a chair as this is just a total mess. AJ hits a sweet move as he jumps up to the top of a ladder with a springboard then off of it onto Bubba with a forearm. I LOVE that move. Christian goes up to the top of the Ultimate X structure and dives off.

 

You know that would have looked way better if we could have seen how far down he came if the camera hadn’t been above him. THAT is the stuff I have to deal with here. Rhyno gores everyone and of course can’t get a pin on anyone. So of course he takes a Doomsday Device through a table. What? You can’t see the clear transition there?

 

We’re just going from spot to spot here with no flow at all and it’s really very annoying. Christian blocks the running belly to belly and then gets 3D’d through a table. This match is making my head hurt. BUBBA HITS A SUPERKICK! AND NOT A  BAD ONE AT THAT! AJ has been 3-1 for like 4 minutes now.

 

He needs better partners. He puts both Dudleys through tables and hits the Styles Clash for two on Angle. And here’s Johnny Devine. WHERE ARE CHRISTIAN AND RHYNO??? Angle Slam gets two. Angle shoves Hebner and of course he hurts his ankle.

 

Can we get a strong referee? AJ sets up a table and a ladder but Trigg hits AJ with a kendo stick and Angle gets the Slam through a table for the pin. Literally, Christian and Rhyno were nowhere to be seen for at least 5 minutes straight at the end and the whole thing was 15 minutes.

Rating: D. This was the biggest mess I’ve seen in a long time. There was no flow anywhere near this as it was just spot after spot. Also, Christian and Rhyno being gone for that long is ridiculous. If they wanted to do AJ vs. Angle then they should have done AJ vs. Angle. Just a total mess but there were some good spots in there. Plus, Bubba doing a superkick is hilarious stuff.

Joe says he’s not afraid and tells Nash to stay in the back. He’s the mentor that of course is going to turn on him later on.

TNA World Title: Samoa Joe vs. Booker T

They’re trying to make this an epic match but I’m not getting the Austin/Rock vibes here. And now let’s have another video package. Now let’s watch both of them walk from the back. Why can’t Joe be this much of a monster now? We hear the beginning of his music and go to ANOTHER video about Joe. Seriously, is this necessary? Also why did he put the belt on his other shoulder during the video?

 

We get the IF JOE WINS WE RIOT sign. No, you won’t. See, in ECW it’s effective because they would have actually rioted. These people won’t and they know it. To kill more time we do big match intros. They chop it out and we’re just in the feeling out stages of course.

 

The fans are about 80% behind Booker here which is exactly what you would expect of him. We hit the floor and Booker takes over and busts Joe open. We’re at shot of Sharmell #8 after less than ten minutes. This is far from epic but it’s not bad I guess. Joe goes aerial a bit which wasn’t bad. There’s a lot of striking in the middle of the ring here and there goes the referee.

 

That’s so clichéd it’s not even funny anymore. We head to the floor for more chops and strikes that aren’t anything special. Joe does get a nice Ole Kick on the floor (Youtube it). Ok, we know what Sharmell looks like. We don’t need to see her every 18 seconds. Joe gets slapped by her and beats up her body guards. Oh and the referee is still down and hasn’t moved and therefore could be dead but no one checks on him. Great guys in TNA.

 

Booker is busted too. Ah there’s a second referee. Joe beats both of the other referees up. They were kind of going for an Austin/Taker insanity thing here and it’s not working really. The idea is he can’t beat Booker and he’s snapping and just beating the tar out of him for it.

 

Security hits the ring and down they go. Sharmell is in the ring as I know where this is going. He puts Booker in a choke and Sharmell screams for help. And cue Sting. There’s Bound for Glory’s main event. Sting gets him to leave and then he goes back to the ring to beat on Booker more.

 

Joe flips him off and says F you which earns him some bat shots. West asking why Sting is doing this cracks me up. Sharmell counts a three and Booker takes the belt. That would set up a cage match between Booker and Joe next month. The announcers being in SHOCK, yes SHOCK I say, ends it.

Rating: C-. While I’ve seen far worse, this wasn’t much at all. The whole insane brawling was a bit much and Joe snapping like that sucked. It set up next month and Bound For Glory even better but at the same time it was just boring. Joe was still decent here and the crowd was white hot though so points for that. Like I said, I’ve seen worse.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t much, although it was better than the previous year’s show by far. The key thing here is that something actually happened. We ended the World X Cup, we move forward in the Joe/Booker feud as well as the Sting feud.

Angle vs. AJ is more or less set for Hard Justice and we had some new angles open up. Now don’t get me wrong: the show mostly sucked, but there’s a point to it which is the most important thing here. Not terrible, but the X Cup stuff is worth seeing if you’re bored and want something a bit different. The rest, not so much.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

 

Victory Road 2010
Date: July 11, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Well I’m not wild on the card but they’ve done a great job of building up to this if nothing else. The main event just does nothing at all for me, but then again neither does the rest of the card. This isn’t going to be much, but the build has been good so maybe there’s some hope. I’ll be watching it out of order but there’s nothing I can do about that. Let’s get to it.

Intro video is just about the road to victory. Seriously is that all they can do for this show?

X Division Title: Brian Kendrick vs. Douglas Williams

This is Ultimate X/Submission which is about as odd of a combination as you could ask for. Williams almost immediately takes him to the mat as he’s afraid of heights. Well at least they’re giving Kendrick every possible out they can. Now let’s see how they manage to mess it up. Kendrick only goes for the Cobra Clutch and neither guy tries to climb yet.

In essence this is just a submission match with the Ultimate X aspect on the side. Naturally they couldn’t just do a submission match because they can advertise Ultimate X to boost buyrates. Who cares that it’s hardly used? They both go up the trellis thing and then Kendrick falls off. Yep he’s out cold. Williams gets some gloves to help him climb as he kills time.

He comes back up though and follows Williams across the ropes. Like an idiot he goes for the Cobra Clutch while hanging on to the ropes and falls backwards, smashing his head into the mat. He was legitimately injured or out cold. Williams throws a hold on him and the referee stops it. Something tells me that wasn’t the planned ending. They have to bring out smelling salts to wake him up.

Rating: D+. This was just pointless overkill again. There was one or at most two big spots as opposed to just doing the freaking submission match that they wanted to. The fear of heights thing was just forgotten, making the whole thing just completely pointless. This was overkill that didn’t work, but then again that’s TNA for you.

Christy is with Ray who says that just like Christy’s issue of Playboy, Jesse Neal is a failure. He gets in her face and makes her cry. We see the same recap video we saw on Impact which gives us nothing about why Bubba is mad but whatever.

Brother Ray vs. Brother D–Von vs. Jesse Neal

Let’s get this over with. Ray comes out first and hides behind the set. He jumps Neal and there’s no D-Von. We cut to the back where D-Von is locked in his dressing room, presumably by Bubba. Clearly the cameraman has no arms because he doesn’t let him out which would involve moving a board. Oh look: more kind of false advertising as it’s the same match from last month.

Again we hear about how much Neal’s life has sucked. We get it already guys, let it go. No one cares about Neal and that’s all there is to it. This is nothing but basic stuff as we’re all just waiting for D-Von to come running out for the big save or beatdown or whatever. Ray of course uses the big boot because that’s all anyone uses for a big strike anymore. The ECW guys are here.

They distract Bubba a bit and Neal gets a spear for two. Shannon Moore comes down for a save which lets Ray hit Neal with a chair. D-Von finally comes out and there’s a staredown. They both look at Jesse and then slug it out. Neal accidentally spears D-Von and a Bubba Bomb ends it. D-Von was in the ring for maybe a minute total.

Rating: F. This was false advertising if nothing else. This was a one on one match with two run-ins. What was the point to this? Just do 3D vs. Ink Inc like you want to do. No one cares about this feud and no one wants to see Bubba vs. D-Von, so of course that’s what we’re going to get.

We recap Love vs. Rayne which shows why the division completely sucks anymore. The BP and Love are the only ones in the division worth anything anymore and that’s not saying much.

Knockouts Title: Madison Rayne vs. Angelina Love

If Rayne wins then Love retires and she can lose the belt by DQ. We start with a big slugout. Rayne is in skin colored clothes. And remember people: these chicks are WAY better than the Divas and don’t you forget it. I really can’t stand this division anymore as it’s somehow more of a joke than WWE.

Rayne wraps her legs around Love’s head and slams it face first into the mat. Her finisher doesn’t work and Love makes her comeback. Rayne brings in a chair and gets it kicked into her face. Can we get on with this? And here’s a chick on a motorcycle. She jumps Love and the referee determines that since she’s either Velvet or Lacey (she’s in a helmet) Rayne is disqualified and Love is champion. Rayne leaves with the chick that just cost her the belt of course. Allegedly it’s Tara, because she retired recently and therefore has to come back immediate.

Rating: D-. This was somehow less interesting than the previous match. This is the third straight title change that hasn’t involved the champion being pinned. Is there a point to this title anymore? Same with the girl tag titles. This is even more of a joke than I could have imagined. Whatever man.

We go back to Anderson who makes pot jokes and says nothing of note other than the signature line.

AJ Styles/Kazarian vs. ???/???

AJ and Kaz can’t get along so of course they’re going to win. The surprises are Terry and Joe. Sure, why not have a guy that is a champion be brought in as a surprise? We can’t have him fight for the title on PPV when we have Ray vs. Neal II!!! AJ vs. Terry start us off and AJ tags out in seconds. The surprise team completely dominates for the early few minutes as you would expect.

AJ and Kaz are getting along quite well. Oh and remember: this isn’t about the wrestlers. This is about impressing Flair. AJ isn’t here for titles. He’s here to make sure Flair is happy. TNA makes my head hurt at times. Instead of going with AJ as the top guy, he’s running around imitating Flair and trying to make him happy. It’s more of TNA wasting what they have for angles that they think people actually want to see.

Instead of talking about the match, we talk about the ranking system. This is ALL Terry/Joe. Ah wait we can talk about Flair a bit now. Wolfe of all people comes down for interference (he jobbed in a dark match of course) and Kaz takes over. AJ hits the springboard 450 on Terry for the pin. They didn’t argue ONCE. Joe beats up Wolfe post match.

Rating: D+. Oh how I hate TNA at times. This could have been a decent match but instead it made no sense from the storyline perspective. The heels have been about to explode for weeks and now they’re all fine and best friends? Also, this is once again about Flair. That’s who the majority of the commentary is about and all that jazz. Just a waste of talent and an angle.

Abyss likes his nail board.

Recap of Morgan vs. Hernandez. Morgan got all cocky and injured Hernandez. Hernandez wants revenge. I love simple angles.

Matt Morgan vs. Hernandez

This is a cage match with escape only rules. I like the look of the cage. Hernandez is freaky in all definitions of the word. Has steel ever been forgiving? In a match based around revenge, Morgan is dominating. I really can’t stand TNA at times. The crowd has been oddly dead for the majority of the match. Hernandez gets on the top and Morgan hits the Carbon Footprint.

This is ALL Morgan. He gets a foot out the door and then just comes back in. To be fair he’s a great heel, but this goes completely against the whole Morgan runs from Supermex and Hernandez wanting revenge that has been built up for months. Hernandez is busted open. We FINALLY get the comeback and his eyes look like he’s coked out of his mind. Hernandez can’t do the Border Toss so he tries it and of course botches it again. At least it came off looking like a power bomb.

He goes up top, as in top of the cage, and misses a splash on Morgan. Blueprint has handcuffs and Hernandez is caught. What is up with Russo’s obsession with handcuffs? Ok that’s not fair as they’ve been used for years. He just breaks them off as Morgan is climbing down and rams his head through the door to get out. So after all that, Hernandez just escapes with no real revenge. Sure why not?

Rating: D+. The psychology didn’t exist, Hernandez doesn’t gain anything, the ending is illogical, Hernandez looks weak and nothing is really solved. This was completely backwards and didn’t go anywhere at all. Not a horrible match, but just something that should have been far different and far better.

Flair talks about how great he is.

Tenay and Taz say exactly what Flair just said.

We get a video saying what Tenay and Taz just said.

Ric Flair vs. Jay Lethal

Come see a senior citizen get pounded! Lethal wears red and yellow as a tribute to Hogan. Seriously, can ANYTHING not be about Hogan or Flair in some way? Taz says Flair is Mr. Credibility. Taz now is fail. Sting can wear a shirt but Flair can’t? Once again the crowd is relatively dead. Flair only does simple stuff like thumbs to the eyes. Could it have anything to do with being 61?

Lethal hits a top rope superplex. Flair is just fine and goes after the knee. The fans chant for Flair, thereby showing how horrible they are at this. Flair of course switches knees halfway through, thereby making him look like an idiot. Figure Four of course doesn’t work and we go back and forth for a bit which borders on entertaining. And there’s Flair’s trunks going down to ruin it.

Ric gets a sleeper. I guess due to his age he needs a nap during matches now. Now Lethal goes for the knees. He gets the weakest chop block ever and puts on the Figure Four. Yep, Flair taps. Jay Lethal has just put a 61 year old man in a leg submission and made him give up. He cries of course because we have to make Flair look good in the end. I hate this company. I truly don’t.

Rating: D+. People want to say this is a huge deal for Lethal. I’m sorry, but no it isn’t. Lethal is what, 24? He beat a guy 37 years older than he is and it’s supposed to be impressive? If this was say 10 years ago it would mean something, but this is just worthless. Flair is a name, but that’s it. What does this prove? Lethal can beat up a guy who could have great grandchildren? Why am I supposed to be impressed? Flair hasn’t meant anything in years so this win is relatively worthless.

Hardy says he’ll win.

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. Motor City Machine Guns

Ok so the Guns more or less have to win here. I like the Guns’ music. Storm and Shelley start us off. They’re doing a slow build to start us off as Taz says the Guns are the best team from their city, including the Tigers. Uh, deep? We get a Mel Torme reference of all things as we’re talking about tap dancing. Beer Money takes over and after a double vertical suplex they do their thing.

Shelley is getting beaten on. This is a good match so far so it’s hard to make jokes. Well other than Taz and Tenay who are always jokes. Ah there’s Sabin. I like him better than Shelley I think. We crank it up a bit and Sabin hits a running punt on Storm while he’s on the apron and Storm is on the floor. The crowd is getting back into it a bit too. Eye of the Storm gets two on Sabin.

I’m sorry for the excessive play by play here but that’s the main thing going on here. That made less than no sense but just go with it. We’ve lost any resemblance of a tag match here as it’s just all insanity. Maybe Heyman is booking the company. Everything just goes insane and this is awesome for once. The Guns dominate as Storm has a beer bottle. The referee gets beer spit in his face as the Guns hit a combination splash/neckbreaker on Roode for two.

There’s another referee here now and I have a bad feeling about this. It’s ALL Guns here as we’re going fast paced here. They hit their kick combination and cover Roode as Storm rolls Sabin up. The referees count a double pin and it’s Dusty Finish time. Earl, not the original referee, says restart it. The Guns win in like a minute with the same thing they did earlier, making the restart TOTALLY POINTLESS. Very good match though so I can’t complain much.

Rating: A-. This was a VERY good match. The main thing holding it back is the restart which was the walking definition of overbooking. What in the world is that supposed to help? Whatever it was I certainly don’t get it. The Guns are the champions, albeit nearly three years later. Still though, if they’re going to win them, at least win them in a classic I guess. Very good match all the way through. Loved it.

We recap Angle’s hunt through TNA’s top ten, which more or less is he beats up everyone to get to the top guy. Pope just happens to be the next guy. There’s no real heat between them. Pope just has the right number.

Kurt Angle vs. D’Angelo Dinero

Angle is listed as #10, yet he’s beaten two guys and Pope is 8th. I love the TNA thinking. We start on the ground. I’m watching this out of order since I got home late so this is the first match I watched. They’re doing the red, white and blue ropes which is cool looking. They booked themselves into a corner here as Angle can’t really lose but Pope is returning and hasn’t won a big match in months. Angle hits a buckle bomb which is always great looking.

This is a solid match to start but they’re not going to have a ton of time unless this goes up until eleven. Kurt is winning but not dominating which is a good thing. Pope steals the Rolling Germans which doesn’t work. Only a handful of people can suplex Angle and he isn’t one of them. Angle’s all like boy I’ll show you Rolling Germans. Pope hits a Codebreaker and the fans are all behind Angle.

Angle Slam hits from nowhere for two. Why are announcers still surprised by that? I don’t get it. Ankle Lock goes on but Pope gets a rollup for two. Ankle Lock again on the mat and it’s over. This needed a bit more time but was entertaining.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all here. The match was never in doubt though which is what hurt it. Angle is in a groove at the moment and this was no exception. This doesn’t hurt Pope that much though as he’ll likely move on to Anderson now. Decent enough match though and certainly passable.

RVD isn’t worried about Abyss and says he’ll stick the nail board up Abyss.

No recap here. Good as it’s not needed.

TNA World Title: Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Damvs. Abyss

Everybody goes for Abyss to start and it doesn’t work. The crowd is odd here for some reason. This goes nowhere as Abyss just gets up. Hardy and Anderson get him down for like a second and we’re into the usual formula here to an extent. Yep we’re in the formula. That’s fine though as it’s really the only way to do this.

We’re mostly just killing time thus far. The crowd seems a bit dead for some reason but maybe it’s just been a long show. Van Dam hits a split legged moonsault on Anderson for two as Hardy saves. Abyss is gone for the moment so I’m waiting on his return to break up a pin. Instead we get a Tower of Doom with RVD taking the big bump from it. The fans chant TNA for a heel doing a big move. That sums things up pretty well.

Everyone is in the ring now and RVD is in control. I have no idea why everyone is trying to beat Abyss. He’s supposed to be unhurtable but they keep going for him. The fans chant for Anderson. This is really just a bunch of near falls with moves on the side. It’s not bad, but it’s the hazard of multiple man matches. Mic Check on Abyss gets two. Black Hole to Hardy gets two. Abyss looks stupid counting the pin.

Anderson and Hardy finally go at it and it gets NOTHING. This crowd is just out of it. Remember who these fans are too. Abyss is on Hardy who is on Anderson so RVD hits the Five Star for the pin. Wow that was anticlimactic.

Post match Abyss beats up RVD and gets the nail board which misses everything. The show ends with Abyss holding the board and RVD looking at him. Yeah that was stupid.

Rating: D. This just didn’t do it for me. It could have been worse, but at the same time there just wasn’t anything at all special here. The ending to both the match and the show just completely sucked, but what did you really expect? I see no reason at all for RVD to retain there, so of course he did. Whatever.

Overall Rating: D. I’m sorry but this show just was not very good. Actually screw that. I’m not sorry as the psychology was gone, very little made sense from the TV shows building it up and there was one truly good match. Everything else was either boring, confusing, or predictable.

 

RVD retains, likely setting up RVD vs. Abyss at Hard Justice in a match that should have been here. The Dudleys aren’t done yet so that solved nothing. Angle wins as you would expect him to and Lethal beat up a 60+ year old man. Someone tell me what good came from this other than the Guns’ win. Just a totally lackluster show. See the tag match though.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

 

Hardcore Justice 2
Date: July 5, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Jeremy Borash

It’s the third One Night Only show with an odd title. There were three regular PPVs called Hardcore Justice, so how can this be the second one? Anyway the theme of the night is obvious, but the bonus attraction is bringing back people who haven’t performed for the company in a long time, such as Generation Me and Homicide. There are a ton of gimmick matches tonight so let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how the company goes hardcore one night of the year. We get clips of the matches we’re about to watch.

Every match tonight will be some form of a hardcore match.

We get a highlight reel of hardcore moments in TNA’s history.

Disciples of the New Church vs. LAX

This is a street fight. The Disciples are a team from the early days of the company and are comprised of Sinn (Kizarny from about five years ago in WWE) and Slash (member of PG-13, a Memphis tag team). Sinn is in a tie and pink pants and Slash is in something resembling shoulder pads. Homicide starts with Slash (thankfully minus the pads) and the later howls a bit. A jumping back elbow gets two for Homicide as we’re still in the tagging portion of the match. Homicide gets two more off a tornado DDT out of the corner and it’s off to SuperMex.

Off to Slash who is immediately taken down by an over the shoulder backbreaker before being catapulted into a Homicide lariat for two. The Disciples take over on Homicide but Hernandez comes in to clean house as things break down. Hernandez puts on a hard hat for some reason as Homicide bulldogs Slash on the apron. Sinn gets beaten up with a stop sign before being sent back inside by Homicide.

All four guys are back in now and this is a pretty lame street fight. Slash misses a Swanton Bomb and gets choked by Homicide as we get back to the tagging. Homicide gets caught in a reverse FU from Slash but things break down again. Slash is sent to the floor and Homicide lays out Sinn with a Gringo Cutter, setting up a top rope splash from Hernandez for the pin.

Rating: D-. What in the world was this? The street fight portion of this lasted maybe two minutes and the rest was nothing more than a regular tag team match. The Disciples were a bad choice for this as almost no one remembers them and they were pretty terrible in the ring. LAX was a good team in their time but in a bubble like this they were just kind of there.

ODB is ready to get hardcore with Jack……DANG IT JACKIE MOORE IS HERE AGAIN.

Video on Jackie and ODB being hardcore.

Jackie Moore vs. ODB

This is a regular hardcore match. ODB takes her to the floor for some HARDCORE spanking but Jackie chops her back. Jackie brings in a broom and what appears to be Vaseline. ODB comes back with hair mousse down Jackie’s pants. Seriously just go with it. She finds some lipstick and a leather boot under the ring as my head is starting to hurt.

Jackie knocks her down with the boot before choking away with a veil. More broom stick shots to the back keep ODB down but she comes back with some forearms to the face followed by a Bronco Buster. Jackie throws powder in ODB’s face but ODB spits beer (from the flask) in Jackie’s face and the Bam (TKO) gets the pin.

Rating: F. If you need an explanation for this, you fail as a wrestling fan.

Bad Influence says they’re ready for Generation Me in their ladder match for $20,000. Daniels says he’s more of a softcore guy (“That Cinemax style.”) and rhymes a bit about Generation Me.

Bad Influence vs. Generation Me

Ladder match as mentioned and Generation Me are Max and Jeremy Buck. They all shake hands to start but but everyone turns on everyone like true heels should. Generation Me takes over with some quick neckbreakers but Bad Influence takes them down with strikes. We get the first ladders brought in as this is moving very fast so far. Jeremy starts climbing but Kaz pelts another ladder at him for the save. The fans seem to be behind the Bucks as Kaz hits a TKO on Max from the top of the ladder.

Daniels gets backdropped onto a ladder and Kaz gets the same via a monkey flip. A ladder is bridged between the ring and the ladder so Max can spear Kaz down under said ladder. Daniels is dropkicked off the apron onto the ladder but Kaz saves his partner from being splashed through the ladder. Jeremy suplexes Kaz from the apron onto the ladder in a very painful looking landing.

Daniels is stuck in the ring with both Bucks but manages to shove Max off the ladder onto the top rope but Max lands on his feet on the rope and springboards down to take out Kaz. AWESOME bit of balance there. Jeremy goes up but Kaz pops back in with a springboard dropkick to make the save. All of the ladders are down now and a sliding dropkick from Kaz sends Max to the floor. Jeremy makes another save on Daniels by slamming him face first into the mat to put him down. Kaz and Max go up but Daniels throws the Appletini into Buck’s face, allowing Kaz to pull the check down for the win.

Rating: B-. This was the kind of pickup the show needed. Sometimes a good spotfest is the solution to your problems and that’s what we got here. This was also a good example of what happens when you put something on the line in a match like this. The $20,000 isn’t a great prize, but it’s worth more than bragging rights or whatever else you want to say the first two matches were worth. Allegedly Kaz is undefeated in ladder matches in TNA. If so that’s rather impressive.

Preview for the Ten Anniversary next month, which is a celebration of the first ten years of the company.

Joseph Park doesn’t have a match tonight but is glad to be here. He talks about some hardcore matches Abyss had over the years. James Mitchel and Judas Mesias come in and say they’re looking for Abyss for revenge. If Abyss doesn’t show up, Park has to take his place in the monster’s ball match.

We recap the first three matches. Do we really need to do that after less than an hour on the air?

Bad Influence is taking the world over, one Appletini at a time.

Hardcore Gauntlet Battle Royal

Everyone gets to bring a weapon with them and it’s a new entrant every two minutes. Usually in TNA gauntlet matches it’s over the top rope eliminations until the final two when it’s pin/submission but there’s no mention of the rules changing for the final two here. We start with Devon Storm who brings a golf club and Little Guido who brings in a dust bin. They fight over the golf club until Storm suplexes Guido down to take over.

Some golf club shots to the back have Guido in trouble but he comes back with a basement dropkick to take over. Guido puts on a Crossface with the club used to choke Storm until Crimson with his umbrella is #3 (out of nine). Crimson cleans house with the umbrella and a big book to Guido. Storm gets double teamed for a bit until Sam Shaw is #4 with a cane. Shaw spins out of a backdrop from Crimson before taking him down with a dropkick. There’s nothing of note going on at all here.

Johnny Swinger is #5 with a crutch but he’s gone in about 40 seconds at Guido’s hands. Crimson hits Guido with the umbrella and leaves some impressive marks on his back as a result. Funaki of all people is #6 with a guardrail. We get the Terry Funk/Sandman/Tommy Dreamer spinning metal object spot from Funaki and the rail until Funaki superkicks Guido out. Gunner is #7 with a nightstick and the fans chant welcome back, showing the issues with a taped PPV.

Gunner tosses Storm out and hits Shaw in the face with a golf club. It’s 2 Cold Scorpio at #8 with a broom to pop the crowd a bit. Shaw trades forearms with Scorpio but gets monkey flipped out. JB: “Unbelievable!” No, not really. Shark Boy is #9 with a bag ala Jake Roberts. It’s Crimson/Gunner vs. Scorpio/Funaki/Sharky with Scorpio hitting a sunset bomb on Gunner to put him down. A middle rope Harlem Hangover hits Crimson and Funaki goes up as well, only to be tossed by Scorpio and Sharky.

Crimson clotheslines Scorpio out and hit a double chokeslam on Sharky. They start throwing weapons out but they’re afraid of the bag. Both of them look in the bag and freak out, allowing Shark Boy to hit Chummers (Stunner) to both guys. Shark Boy pulls…..a fish out of the bag. The fish “bites” Gunner and a fish shot eliminates Crimson. Sharky backdrops Gunner out for the win.

Rating: D-. Not only was the match boring, but it’s a match that would have fit in the stupid comedy era of the WWF hardcore division. The weapons were all stupid and the fish at the end made it even worse. The “comedy” here was in the vein of beat people over the head and yell IT’S COMEDY in their face, which is my least favorite kind.

Aces and 8’s are ready for their six man tag tonight and don’t care who Storm/Magnus’ mystery partner is.

We recap Bully Ray’s master plan with Aces and 8’s. The amount of time (this runs like 5 minutes) they’re spending on recaps here tells me they were running out of ideas for these marathon PPV tapings.

Aces and 8’s vs. James Storm/Magnus/???

It’s Brisco/Knux/Doc here and this is under hardcore elimination rules. Storm’s surprise partner: Bob “Hardcore” Holly. Holly has a big chest/shoulder tattoo now which screams mid life crisis. He’s in jeans and sneakers here as he starts with Knux and stomps him down in the corner. Off to Brisco who gets kicked between the legs before it’s off to Storm. The fans are more fired up for this match than they’ve been for almost anything tonight.

Storm hits a quick running enziguri in the corner but gets caught in the back by Doc who comes in off a tag. James knocks him down by like a superstar knocking down a big enforcer before bringing in Magnus. They go to the floor for a bit until Magnus gets caught in the wrong corner. Brisco drives shoulders into the Brit’s ribs before it’s off to Doc for right hands. Magnus is crushed by a corner clothesline and it’s back to Knux who gets two off a side slam.

Brisco hooks a cravate followed by a chinlock before it’s back to Doc for a snap suplex. Magnus escapes a chokeslam and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Hot tag brings in Storm to face Brisco as things break down. It’s off to Holly with what looks like a pipe to clean house, only to have Knux hit a big boot to slow him down.

A powerbomb is countered into the Alabama Slam to eliminate Knux but Brisco rolls Holly up for a quick elimination. Magnus blasts Brisco in the head with a trashcan lid and gets a pin off a falcon’s arrow, only to walk into a chokeslam from Doc to get it down to one on one. Doc blasts Storm with the trashcan lid for two but spends too much time boasting, allowing Storm to hit the Closing Time and Last Call for the final pin.

Rating: C. This was nothing of note and I don’t think anyone bought Storm as being in any danger at all. Hardcore Holly as a surprise makes sense on a show like this but he’s a fifty year old man who never meant much of anything in the first place. This was by far and away the second best match of the night so far.

We recap Abyss vs. James Mitchell which is a feud that went on for YEARS. Mitchell is Abyss’ father (no word on if he’s Park’s dad) and brought in Judas Mesias (Abyss’ stepbrother) to attack Abyss with barbed wire. A long blood feud followed.

Joseph Park is in the back and is panicking since no one has seen Abyss.

We get a video on the history of Monster’s Ball, which is TNA’s signature hardcore match.

Mesias vs. Joseph Park

There’s no Abyss so Park has to take his place in this monster’s ball match. Park shoves the much smaller Mesias around and avoids a charge in the corner, only to get jumped from behind and pounded against the ropes. Park misses a charge in the corner and gets taken down by a spear, allowing for the first weapons to come in. Park gets a trashcan lid but gets hit in the stomach with a hockey stick before he can swing it.

They head to the outside with Park’s comeback being stopped cold by a whip into the steps. Back in and Mesias stays on offense with a faceplant, only to miss a top rope splash. Park comes back with some shoulder blocks and puts the trashcan over Mesias’ crotch for a shot with a steel pipe. A chair is wedged between the ropes but Mesias comes back with a trashcan shot to Park’s back for two.

Park hits him low with a cheese grater and gets in some shots with a kendo stick for two. He tries a seated senton onto a chair onto Mesias but gets crotched just in time. Park sends him head first into the wedged chair but the middle rope splash only gets two. A hockey stick shot busts Park’s nose, Abyss mode, Black Hole Slam and pin.

Rating: D. This is another example of how the gimmick can’t save a boring match. There’s no reason for these two to be fighting and the match wasn’t interesting as a result. It was a bunch of weapon shots and an ending gag we’ve seen for months now. Nothing to see here but Park’s act wasn’t getting old when this was filmed.

Post match Park goes after Mitchell but comes back to reality just in time.

Team 3D says they’re reuniting in a tables match tonight against Brother Runt and some mystery partner. It won’t be Dreamer, Sandman or Sabu because they’re either fat, drunk or in a hospital. D-Von does the Dudley Commandments for the first time in years.

Video on people going through tables.

Team 3D vs. Brother Runt/???

Tables match of course. It’s surprising to see Bully as an Ace when that turn wasn’t until months after this was taped. D-Von corners So Cal Val in the corner but doesn’t shove his crotch in her face at least. Bully Ray cuts a long and dull promo before the match about the awesomeness of Tea 3D while insulting a bunch of fans. Ray takes some jabs at Holly for no apparent reason before talking about using Runt as a pawn during the wedding to Brooke. He makes the same jokes about Dreamer and Sandman while saying Runt has no partner. Runt comes out and has a partner: Jeff Hardy.

The Dudleys send Jeff to the floor before Bubba drives Runt’s glasses into his forehead. D-Von beats on Runt with basic power stuff but Runt blocks a suplex, only to be taken down by a clothesline. Off to Ray for a wishbone split before yelling at Earl Hebner in the corner. Ray blocks the Dudley Dog and breaks up a sunset flip attempt but D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt, allowing Runt to make the hot tag.

Jeff cleans house with a low dropkick on D-Von as things break down. Bully kicks Jeff down but the Dudleys can’t hit What’s Up. Instead it’s Runt hitting one on D-Von before calling for the tables. Jeff brings in a table but Team 3D takes over again. A double suplex to Runt misses the table and Jeff hits a Twisting Stunner on D-Von. Runt adds the Dog to put D-Von on the table but Ray makes the save. Jeff and Runt take over again and Hardy splashes D-Von through a table (barely) for the win. It’s as lame of a build as it sounds.

Rating: D. This was nothing to see again with and felt like a bad house show main event. I get the idea of Brother Runt having history with the Dudleys, but we’ve seen this match so many times that it’s almost impossible to care about anymore. Jeff getting the win to end the show is the right idea to send the fans home happy but man it was dull getting there.

Overall Rating: D. This was by far the worst of these shows so far. The only good match was the ladder match with the elimination match being just ok in second place. This came off more like a tribute to the WWF Hardcore Title instead of a tribute to the hardcore division as most of the matches were either lame or comedy matches, with people like Park or ODB not being funny. Nothing to see here at all, but the ladder match isn’t terrible.

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TNA Weekly PPV #1
Date: June 19, 2002
Location: Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West, Ed Ferrara

So since last night was the 3 hour Impact, I thought it was a good time to go back to the beginning and take a look at the origins of TNA. This was the Wednesday night series when once a week for 9.95 you could watch the NWA. It’s still the old school show at this point and this is literally their first show ever. No one knew it would one day become as big as it is now, but it amazingly is.

This is from about the time that Hogan is world champion in the WWF. Actually no he’s not as Taker would have it at this point, but Hogan is still around. Anyway, let’s take a look back at almost 8 years ago and see how TNA got its start.

The intro is of course about the old days of the NWA because everyone wants to see that right? Don West brings out Ed Ferrara, who looks almost exactly like Road Dogg. I saw him and thought it was him. He even sounds like him. Tenay welcomes us to the show as apparently we have to start with a legends ceremony. There will be a new world champion tonight in the first ever Gauntlet for the Gold. It’s a Royal Rumble but the last two have a singles match.

Oh I’m going to get sick of Ferrara.

JB, in a four sided ring of all things, introduces some legends. Harley Race, Dory Funk Jr., Jackie Fargo, Bullet Bob Armstrong, Corisca Joe and Sara Lee (who ARE these people?), Bill Behrens, who wants you to know he likes the NWA and if you don’t know, he’ll make sure to tell you, Ricky Steamboat (NOW we’re getting somewhere! He has the world title with him and they say it must be like old times for him to have it.

That would be the case if he held that one and not the big gold belt which he actually had). Steamboat addresses the crowd. There actually was a reason for this starting the show: something about a no show or something and they had to reschedule things. Steamboat says he’s the referee for the main event tonight.

Jeff Jarrett interrupts and says the main event is going to suck. Well ok then. He says it’s going to be stupid and then Mike Tenay just sounds like a freaking moron by shouting answers at the questions that Jarrett asks. Jackie Fargo is annoying. He’s a legend, but he’s old. That’s the problem with the NWA: they believe that the fans care about these old guys that most of them have never heard of.

Apparently Fargo has matchmaking power and puts Jarrett in at number one. Ken Shamrock comes out and agrees it’s going to suck. Here’s Scott Hall. This feels like last night. Oh let’s reference the NWO again, because that’s SUCH a fresh idea. HALL says the battle royal will suck, but they have to do it so shut up. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? They had the three biggest stars in the company say that the show is going to suck. You can’t script this kind of stuff.

Some chick named Goldilocks talks to a midget. Take that Hornswoggle bashers.

AJ Styles/Low Ki/Jerry Lynn vs. The Flying Elvises

You read that name right. They’re Jorge Estrada, Jimmy (Wang) Yang and Sonny Siaki. It’s original if nothing else. AJ looks YOUNG here. He’s just a regular guy. The legends in the back aren’t sure what to say. They point out that this isn’t about weight limits, even though other than Joe, no one with any weight has ever held the belt and he was about 5 years away. Ok so the Elvises are heels. Got it.

The faces hit dropkicks and ranas to start. It’s your standard spotfest to start and that’s fine. It’s a tried and true method to get the crowd going so there we are. Next week we have the X-Division Title tournament in a round robin tournament. Cool. I might do more or these but we’ll see. More or less everyone just shows off for awhile which is what they’re supposed to do.

The X Division has never been about stories but just insanity and that’s perfectly fine. We start the Elvis puns and I shake my head. For the life of me I’ll never get how the Honky Tonk Man got over as much as he did. We get an MMA reference before MMA was cool. Here’s AJ who looks about 17 here. Estrada kicks his head off so there we go. Lynn hits the Cradle Piledriver and it’s all breaking down. We get our first Pele kick. Yang hits a rotating moonsault to pin AJ which means nothing at this point.

Rating: B-. This was fine. There was no story and there wasn’t supposed to be. This was to get the crowd going and it did just that and more. It’s really short but that’s fine. No problems here, but DANG AJ looked like he was in high school or something.

Hollywood vs. Teo

Yes, it’s a midget match. The irony here is STUNNING. Oh Teo is an EXTREME midget. Apparently Rey Mysterio was originally asked to be a midget wrestler in Mexico. That has nothing to do with the mask but they talk about it anyway as they need to get references to WWE in there to give them credibility.

I have no idea what the point to this match is. Teo hits a splash from the top that wasn’t bad. Naturally the biggest spot in the match gets two. A top rope leg drops gives Teo the win. His name stands for Totally E. Outstanding. Oh dear goodness.

Rating: N/A. It’s like two minutes long and I’ll spare the it was too short jokes. I’ve never gotten the appeal of these matches but whatever.

Girls dance.

Ferrara and West get in the ring to announce a lingerie battle royal for next week. They bring out some of the women for next week, including Francine, Joanie (no clue who that is), Daffney (they say she used to be Daffney but now she’s Shannon), Alexis Laree (Mickie James, pre implants), Sasha (no clue but she’s ugly), a Ravens cheerleader named Erin, Elektra from ECW, Taylor Vaughn (who is apparently familiar but I don’t know her) and some chick named Tarita.

This is just an eye candy segment but not a very good one. Mickie looks WAY different, to the point where I had trouble picking her out of a line. Francine and Elektra argue and it’s apparent why they never talked. They actually blame Francine for ECW going bankrupt. A guy would wind up winning the battle royal.

There’s a guy named Mortimer Plumtree. I can’t make this up. He’s a teacher apparently, just not a very good one. He would actually wind up managing AJ for awhile. He has a tag team that we don’t see. Oh wait it’s the Johnsons.

Johnsons vs. Psicosis/James Storm

Yes, it’s the tag team that wear masks and full body suits colored like human flesh. This team actually exists. Storm looks completely different too and it’s not a good thing either. Storm fires off some cap guns. Good for him. OH MAN he looks young. Apparently their names are Richard and Rod, or Dick and Rod. I hate this already. Ryan Shamrock comes out looking hot to watch them.

And now it devolves into nothing but jokes. They say Psicosis’ real name for absolutely no apparent reason. Ryan Shamrock, called Alicia, still is there. Storm hits a rana and a good one at that. They say Storm could be great. Not really but he’s not bad. And then he gets pinned off a bad TKO.

Rating: D+. This was just pointless. It’s like they have nothing but the main event and they know it. This was just freaking awful. The jokes were completely pointless and annoying. I have no clue what they were going for here but whatever.

The referee gives Ryan Shamrock money.

The Dupps, a hillbilly team, torment Goldilocks. They and some chick try to drink beer but some random as guy says not to. Ok then.

Two NASCAR guys are here for the sake of being NASCAR guys. Ron Killings (R-Truth) show up to interrupt them. Of course he’s a heel because he hates NASCAR and says it’s not a sport. Brian Christopher of all people shows up and beats up R-Truth. Naturally a match is set up for next week. Oh and his name is K-Krush here. Dang they got that one right eventually.

Jeff Jarrett harasses a 71 year old man. Thanks for killing another 15 seconds.

Christian York/Joey Matthews vs. The Dupps

The Dupps are named Stan and Bo. Stan Dupp. Oh dear. Their cousin is both of their girlfriends. I hate this gimmick already. The faces are your standard face cruiserweight tag team. They have a ton of charisma if nothing else, but they’re just generic. Ferrara needs to fall in a hole. After the faces dominate for about two minutes the girl interferes to crotch York for the pin.

Rating: F-. This was a waste of 4 minutes of my life. The heels had NO offense but they win on a fluke anyway. That’s just crap but of course it’s what they went with here. I hated this and they could have used it for ANYTHING else.

Toby Keith has one of his music videos played and then sings live. That’s completely pointless again but it’s considered an epic moment. Jarrett interrupts him and we start the battle royal now.

NWA World Title: Gauntlet for the Gold

Royal Rumble with 90 second clocks and then a singles match at the end. Jarrett is first and second is Buff Bagwell. Bagwell hits the Blockbuster and then is thrown out. Before the 90 seconds are up they have the next guy come in to avoid the clock just ticking away. I like that. Lash Leroux of all people is second. Just end this now. He’s out in about 45 seconds and Norman Smiley is 4th of 20.

There goes Norman after about a minute. This is just pointless. Apollo, a Puerto Rican wrestler with a great look is 5th. K-Krush is 6th and he saves Jarrett. Actually he doesn’t but the announcers say he does. This is just mindless stuff as nothing of note is happening and it’s just random stuff to fill in time, which is how you could describe the whole show to be fair. Oh hey let’s make fun of Toby Keith even more.

Tenay is TICKED that the heels are working together for no apparent reason. Slash, with James Mitchell who has a stable that we haven’t heard from until now, is 7th. He’s one half of PG-13 who was a big deal in Memphis and nowhere else. Jarrett saves him for no apparent reason. Must be a Tennessee thing. Del Rios who is another big guy is next. He’s a former USWA (Memphis) champion. He’s a Scott Steiner lookalike and they even point that out.

He’s better known as Phantasio, which is a guy that Monkey is a mark for. He was a wrestling magician of all things which somehow evolved into Papa Shango but was given to the guy that played him instead. Oh come on he’s even got the Superman S on his trunks. Some guy from NWA Wildside, a former WCW farm territory, is 9th. The clock is off the screen now and the times are getting longer. Konnan is 10th.

Every guy has their resume read with as many WCW, WWF and ECW references as we can get in there. He beats up everyone and the crowd loves him. We really need some eliminations. Joel Gertner who has lost about 100lbs brings out Bruce from a team called the Rainbow Express. Yes it’s a gay tag team and Billy and Chuck are a big deal at the moment. No coincidence there at all.

He’s Kwee Wee from WCW if you’re wondering. He’s the guy that wins the battle royal next week. MAYBE 15 seconds later, Rick Steiner comes out. Slash is out. There goes Justice who looks like a combination of Rhyno and one of the Pitbulls and now Rick goes after Jarrett. Malice (The Wall from WCW) is 13th. He chokeslams everyone in sight. Ok with Konnan it’s more like a chokeshove.

Truth makes up for it though by going WAY into the air. There goes Bruce, Truth, Del Rios, Konnan and Steiner are gone, leaving us with Malice, Apollo and Jarrett. Scott Hall is 14th to a huge pop and they actually give him a resume too, like he needs it. He’s the Outlaw now for no apparent reason. Hall hits a Razor’s Edge on Jarrett and here’s Toby Keith to suplex Jarrett and throw him out.

Oh how I hate singers trying to be wrestlers and failing so badly at getting people to care. Hall actually throws Jarrett out to make it count for the ridiculous NWA. Chris Harris is 15th and no one cares as no one knows who he is. Vampire Warrior (Gangrel) runs out early and beats up Harris. Ferrara will not shut up about Jarrett and I’m sick of him in ways I didn’t think were humanly possible.

Devon Storm, more commonly known as Crowbar from WCW, is next. The second biggest star in this match is Gangrel. That says the whole thing. Steve Cornio is 18th as I can’t believe this made it 5 weeks. Ken Shamrock is the penultimate entrant and he suplexes a lot of people. Brian Christopher, who should give his father 20% of every dollar he ever makes in wrestling because he never would have made a dime otherwise. A ton of people go out in succession and all by Christopher. Yes, they had him be a force.

The final five are Shamrock who is almost unrecognizable, Christopher (out before I finish his name), Malice, Apollo and Hall. Malice puts out everyone not named Shamrock, so it’s Ken Shamrock vs. the Wall for the world title. You read that right. This is just garbage as he survives the ankle lock for about 40 seconds before walking around just fine. A belly to belly ends a five minute nightmare.

Rating: F+. This was just a trainwreck. We had Brian Christopher, Gangrel, Lash Leroux and Norman Smiley in the main event. Let that sink in for a bit. Also, Shamrock beats the Wall for the title. Why not Hall, who people at least know? This was just a mess, much like the whole show. I have no idea what the point here was but it was bad. This was ¼ of the show, and that’s just unacceptable. The booking was off the wall as SHAMROCK, who hadn’t been seen in about two years and looked awful, gets the belt.

Jackie Fargo, who looks and sounds older than his 71, wants to fight Jarrett who wants to fight Toby Keith but Scott Hall fights Jarrett next week. They brawl to end this mess.

Overall Rating: D-. And that’s being generous. This was awful on all levels as nothing of note happens with the main event was just a trainwreck. When the three biggest names you have all say the main event is stupid, it hurts things badly. There is zero flow to this and if I didn’t know better, I would have bet on this not making it three months.

They changed things up a lot and it got a ton better, namely when Russo and a ton of other guys showed up to replace guys like the Dupps and the jokes in the main event. Definitely stay away from this one as it’s awful.

 

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Slammiversary 2007
Date: June 17, 2007
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

Back to TNA again and in this case it’s the anniversary show. Since Eric and Hulk aren’t around yet, we have the then signature TNA match in the form of the King of the Mountain. This is for the vacant title because the NWA left and therefore we’re needing a first official TNA World Champion. Chris Harris is in the main event because…..I don’t think anyone knows the answer to that actually. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a of some shots of old wrestling and then the original TNA logo. We cut to some country/bluegrass style music set to clips of the old TNA stuff. Jarrett beating up Hogan is in there. Hogan never came to TNA until 2010, officially at least. Now we’re looking at someone that looks like Tiger Woods putting a golf ball as West and Tenay do commentary. Jeff Jarrett hits him with a guitar and keeps the ball from going in. Ok then.

Some band performs the theme song for the PPV. Fast forward time.

LAX vs. Rhyno/Senshi

LAX had dominated the company in 07 and this is Senshi (Kaval) and Rhyno’s first time teaming together. The camera seems a bit lower than usual. Maybe it’s a venue thing. Hector Guerrero is with Senshi/Rhyno because Konnan has been blaming him for LAX losing the tag belts. Rhyno and Homicide start us off and a powerbomb is messed up, sending Homicide to the floor I think by mistake.

Off to Senshi who steps onto the bottom rope to get in. Hernandez comes in and Senshi manages to get out of the way to preserve his life. He goes after SuperMex’s leg which doesn’t really do much at all. LAX can’t get anything going here and never mind that as Hernandez picks Senshi up and LAUNCHES him across the ring. I mean that man was airborne. It looked incredible.

Back to Homicide as LAX takes over and beats on Senshi. Rhyno hasn’t really done much so far but I guess they’re saving him for the big hot tag at the end. To be fair he’s good at the big explosive comebacks so I can live with that one. Hernandez throws Senshi around again but a powerbomb is countered and Senshi manages to hit the double stomp to set up the aforementioned hot tag. Rhyno throws everyone around and Hernandez goes to the floor. Senshi hits a HUGE dive to take him out but Homicide hits a cutter on Rhyno. Konnan and Hector get involved, allowing Rhyno to gore Homicide for the pin.

Rating: B-. Fun opener here and the high spots were VERY high. That’s how you open a show as the crowd is now really fired up and it’s due to the proper pacing of a tag match. On top of that, they kept it relatively short (8 minutes or so) which is the idea for an opener. Good stuff here and I liked it quite a bit.

Scott Steiner is legit injured and had to legit have his life saved in Puerto Rico so he might not be here.

We run down the card because that’s what TNA does on its PPVs.

There’s a mystery person in King of the Mountain, which I’ve already spoiled.

Video explaining King of the Mountain. We even recap the qualifying matches to fill in even more time.

Eric Young is all paranoid about getting fired. Traci Brooks, Roode’s associate, comes up to try and seduce him which would eventually work, making him sign with Roode. Gail Kim comes in and snaps him out of it by kissing him.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal

Sabin has been champion for like five months at this point. Nash comes out for commentary because he’s molded Lethal into Black Machismo recently. Nash’s headset goes out almost immediately after the bell rings and the fans are split. Lethal gets a pretty sweet headscissors to send him to the floor, followed by an ok suicide dive. Sabin spits in Lethal’s face and hits a jumping knee to the face to take over.

Sabin fires off something like a Garvin Stomp but does it fast enough that I don’t have to think of Garvin. The announcers are talking about Nash beating Backlund in MSG. How exactly can you analyze a match that lasted 8 seconds? We go into a standard match formula with Sabin beating Lethal down until we get to the Lethal comeback and then go to the finish.

I’m not sure what it means when you can more or less call the formula for a match about halfway through it, but I don’t think it’s anything good. Lethal makes that comeback with a few hip tosses and a spinning cross body for two. Nash: “This place used to be called Jonesville. Then I got here.” Lethal hits a unique move which can only be described as a reverse fisherman’s suplex into a reverse powerbomb. Looked good but too complicated at the same time.

Sabin takes over with some rapid fire kicks which is what he would get more famous as soon enough in the Motor City Machine Guns. Lethal grabs a full nelson but can’t hit the Lethal Combination. The second time works a bit better and the big elbow gives Lethal his first of I believe six X-Titles.

Rating: C. Just ok here and nothing all that great. Lethal wasn’t exactly over yet and he wouldn’t be for a long time. At this point he was just a goofy 22 year old who did nothing but imitated a much better guy. Nothing to see here but for a big show they needed a title change so that’s all fine and good.

At the Slammiversary press conference, we set up the football players match. Yeah there are former Tennessee Titans wrestling tonight. Oh joy.

Storm is with Lauren (GORGEOUS) and rants about Wycheck some more.

Frank Wycheck/Jerry Lynn vs. James Storm/Ron Killings

Why is this happening? Oh because Wycheck was at the first shows. Ok then. Truth and Lynn start us off which is probably the best thing they can do. Off to Wycheck for the showdown with Storm….and Storm knocks him down on the first shot. Storm puts on a Titans helmet and dances around a bit and then knocks Wycheck down again.

Frank takes over and throws Lynn over the top onto the heels and the fans think this is good stuff. I guess the TNA stupidity follows them around. Wycheck misses a shot and is in trouble again. He had to retire due to concussions so the heels go for his head. A chair is brought in but the distraction is enough to get the tag to Lynn. Eye of the Storm takes care of him and Storm spits beer in the face of the other football player at ringside.

Truth comes in and doesn’t do as well so it’s a double tag again. Wycheck beats up both heels with celebrity stuff but Storm kicks his head off to cheers. The other football player makes the save and gets in a fight with Jackie. Everything breaks down and Storm has to take the cradle piledriver from Wycheck. Dang I hope he got a nice big bonus for that one.

Rating: D. I hate celebrity matches. I have no connection to Frank Wycheck and the only reason he’s there was he was a big football player in Tennessee. I love the NFL, but this doesn’t mean anything to me and we have to get a bad match that looks like Storm isn’t talented enough to beat a guy with zero experience. I hate these things.

We recap Backlund vs. Shelley. Shelley was one of Nash’s students and Backlund was crazy about Nash beating him back in 94. Shelley said that he could beat Backlund in 9 seconds and there was something about a book being stolen or something like that.

Bob Backlund vs. Alex Shelley

Backlund is one of those cases where I have no idea what they were thinking when they brought him in. We hear the stories of Backlund not signing autographs unless you can recite all of the presidents in order. Backlund takes him down with ease and the fans are mostly on Shelley’s side. They slug it out a bit and Backlund takes him into a short armed scissors. Backlund uses the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels counter (which should be called the Backlund counter but whatever).

Backlund hits a gorgeous butterfly suplex and then an atomic drop which used to be Backlund’s finisher. Sabin runs in to trip him up but gets crotched on the top. Shelley gets dropped into Sabin’s balls and a bridging O’Connor Roll beats Shelley clean. Yes, Bob Backlund just destroyed the Motor City Machineguns by himself in less than four minutes.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but this is a great example of “what were they thinking”. I mean don’t get me wrong, Backlund is a legend, but this is the year 2007. Who are they really appealing to with him? This one isn’t about me being mad about him being there, but more of genuine confusion. I don’t get this one at all.

The Guns try to double team him but they both get put in the Crossface Chickenwing. Nash comes out to break it up and Jerry Lynn comes out to even the odds. Nash kicks Lynn down and the Guns beat up Backlund. Now Jay Lethal comes down and beats up the Guns as well. I have NO IDEA what just happened.

Christopher Daniels starts calling out Sting and the lights go out. He’s the Fallen Angel at the moment and is facing Sting tonight. Daniels talks about being here to do the Father’s work and how he’s an angel. Again, I have no idea what they’re talking about here and I don’t think they know either.

We recap Christy Hemme vs. the Voodoo Kin Mafia (New Age Outlaws). They basically said you have to sleep your way to the top so she brought in a bunch of teams to face them and I think this is the final one with her bringing in the Bashams. There was a big brawl backstage and Road Dogg gave a big angry promo about it.

Voodoo Kin Mafia vs. Damaja/Basham

At least we can look at Christy’s hottness. Big brawl to start and no one is really all that interested. Christy is chased into the ring and oh hey there’s the bell. Basham (Danny) vs. Road Dogg to start us off. Roadie gets beaten down and it’s off to Kip. He gets double teamed as well as the Bashams set for a double suplex. Roadie spears one of them and Billy gets a small package to Basham for the pin. This was NOTHING, not even lasting three minutes.

Billy chases Christy up the ramp but VKM associate Lance Hoyt picks her off. And then Hoyt beats up the VKM. Jimmy Rave would be added to form the Rock N Rave Infection which would only result in more tiny outfits for Christy and nothing else to note. This should have been on Impact. Oh and Christy kisses Hoyt after the Bashams help for a 3-2 beatdown.

Rick Steiner is mad about not having a match tonight but he has a partner. He whispers it in Cornette’s ear and Jim is very happy, saying the match is on.

LAX beats up Hector Guerrero.

We recap Roode vs. Young which is STILL going on. Jeff Jarrett made a one off return to help Eric and won Young’s freedom which didn’t count. The match is for Eric’s freedom of course but if Eric loses he’s fired, which was what Eric was terrified of at this point.

Robert Roode vs. Eric Young

Roode slaps Young in the head a bit and it fires Young up, making him shout HIT ME AGAIN. Young sends him to the floor and hits a huge dive off the top to take Roode out. Roode takes over quickly and we make Brooks jokes. There’s the Hennig neck snap and Roode is in total control. Time for a chinlock and I remember why I hated this heel run by Roode.

Eric counters into an electric chair drop and both guys are down. Discus lariat gets two for Eric. Young is sent to the floor so he pulls Brooks’ pants down after dancing with her. Top rope elbow gets two for Eric. Brooks comes in and there’s a double Death Valley Driver which gets two on Roode. You know, because a big and impressive spot like that shouldn’t end a match. And then Roode whacks Eric in the head with a chair for the pin. Seriously that’s it.

Rating: C-. The ending KILLS that match. Young was rather popular at this point and having him lose after a big spot like that is really pretty stupid. Roode was SO freaking boring as a heel and he never really changed anything about his character, which somehow made him even more boring. Decent match until the ending, but that kills it.

It’s a Dusty Finish though. Roode fires Eric but here’s Cornette to say hang on a second. The match is restarted and Roode hits him in the head multiple times. Gail runs out and beats down Brooks. The distraction leads to a rollup pin for Eric.

Team 3D doesn’t care who Steiner’s partner is. They think Scott’s throat problem is because he talked about the Dudleys too much and he’s hiding. D-Von’s head looks like it’s made of old shoe leather.

Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. Rick Steiner/???

And the mystery partner is….Road Warrior Animal. Yeah that’s it. The fans chanting it before he came out kind of hurt the shock a bit. Rick puts on his head gear post bell and it makes a huge difference. Rick vs. D-Von to start us off. I don’t think Scott is in the hospital. I think it’s more like he and Animal cooked him and had him for a late night snack. It would explain those guts on them.

Animal offers to come in and Rick waves him off. Nice partner dude. Oh ok there he is and Ray gets in his face. A piledriver is no sold and we have gimmick infringement from Hawk. I guess since he’s dead it’s ok. Back to Rick and they mistime something, as I think Ray was supposed to hit Rick as he hit the ropes but Rick stopped with zero contact at all. Off to Bubba legally and a neckbreaker gets two.

D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt and there’s the tag to Animal. Something I never get: why can a team that has never teamed together before like Steiner and Animal get a tag title match? There isn’t another team that can challenge the Dudleys? Animal cleans house and it’s back to Rick as everything breaks down. The challengers try to load up the Doomsday Device but Animal gets caught in the double neckbreaker and the 3D ends Rick.

Rating: D. These “dream” matches usually suck because by the time you get teams big enough to have a dream match, they’re old. To be fair though, there was almost no way Animal, who barely wrestled anymore, was going to be able to come out there and have a decent match. Scott may be old and slow but he’s active at least. Bad match, but understandably bad.

We recap Daniels vs. Sting. Sting mentored him which I don’t even remember and Daniels snapped because of it. I remember being excited for this match but thinking the match sucked. I wonder if it’ll still be the case. Wait….that might have been Sting vs. Storm. I think it was actually.

Christopher Daniels vs. Sting

Sting repels from the ceiling for no apparent reason. It looked cool though. Sting takes over to start and speeds things up, which you would think would favor Daniels. He hooks the Deathlock very quickly but Daniels grabs a fast rope. Daniels takes over and has a stupid Mike Tyson style tattoo (paint) around his eye. Sting fights back but neither guy can get a hip toss.

We go old school with an abdominal stretch which doesn’t count for some reason. Daniels and Hebner get into it a bit and then he snaps off a Stinger Splash. This of course fires up the Stinger and Daniels is in trouble. Faceplant gets two. Two Stinger Splashes are broken up and the Last Rites (Cross Rhodes) is countered into the Death Drop for the pin.

Rating: D+. Yeah it was this match that I found boring and lackluster. There was nothing here at all and Sting just beat him up like he was any other guy. Daniels had been built up as the guy that could take down Sting and Sting destroyed him here. I don’t get the point of this one and it didn’t work at all.

We recap Abyss vs. Tomko. This was another part of Abyss vs. Christian’s Coalition. Abyss had taken a huge beatdown from the whole team and Tomko is the first victim for him.

Christian’s Coalition says Christian will win the title tonight. AJ protests because he’s in there too. Christian says AJ will sacrifice himself so Christian can win the title and Styles isn’t sure what to think of that but he goes along with it because he’s an idiot at this point.

Tomko vs. Abyss

This is No DQ. Slugout to start is won by Abyss and they head to the floor. Tomko takes over with the violent tendencies, ramming Abyss into the steps to take over. Back in a bit boot puts Tomko down and TOTALLY misses an Umaga charge in the corner. Tomko sold it anyway because he’s not that talented. Chokeslam gets two. Here are the tacks but Tomko reverses and powerbombs Abyss onto them for two.

Abyss’ arm is busted open so he fires a shot to Tomko and hits the floor to get another bag. This time it’s glass but again he takes too long and Tomko gets a big jagged piece and drives it into Abyss’ head. In a SICK spot, Abyss is kneeling over the glass so Tomko practically curb stomps him into it. FREAKING OW MAN!!! They head to the floor again and Tomko finds a barbed wire ball bat which goes into the ribs and back of Abyss.

They go to the entrance and begin to climb. This isn’t going to end well. Tomko is up top with the bat but Abyss grabs the bat and pulls Tomko down to a big box sort of thing which falls apart. Tomko being up a few seconds later completely ruins the spot. I mean he’s up maybe 8 seconds later. Abyss is down even longer than Tomko was after that flip. Are you kidding me? Back in the ring, Tomko tries to pick Abyss up but walks into the Black Hole Slam onto the glass for the pin. That was pretty anti-climactic.

Rating: B-. This was about violence and on that note it worked, but the big spot of the match completely bombed. Like I said, having him pop up so fast just killed it. Not a great match or anything here but it was fun for the most part and that’s really all they could have hoped for out of this one.

Angle and Joe stare it down in the back. Angle says let’s go have a great match and beat each other up badly. Joe shakes his hand but says tonight it’s real.

Mike Tenay is in the ring for some reason. He shows us an interview with Jeff Jarrett. His wife Jill had legitimately died recently and he wasn’t sure if he was going to keep wrestling. He talks about the history of the company, including stuff like Toby Keith and beating up Hulk Hogan. He talks about founding the company and his wife agreeing that it was ok. Then he gets to the heavy stuff, talking about his wife passing away less than a month ago. Jarrett is in tears almost the entire time while he’s saying this. Being in the ring is the worst place he can be right now though, so his future is unknown.

The fans aren’t sure if they should chant for Jill or Jeff.

Cornette announces the last guy in the match will be Chris Harris.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage vs. Chris Harris

This is King of the Mountain and the title is vacant. Ok so King of the Mountain is TNA’s signature match, or at least it was before Hogan and Bischoff took over. There are five guys and there is a place to hang the belt above the ring. In essence, it’s a reverse ladder match because you have to hang the belt above the ring. Before you’re allowed to do that though, you have to qualify by pinning someone else. When someone is pinned that person has to go to the penalty box for two minutes. Got all that?

Joe goes right after Angle. Cornette is holding the belt. This is kind of a mess at first which makes it really hard to call. Cage and Styles beat up Harris and then Styles lays down for Cage. Angle makes the save but Joe wants to hurt him some more. Styles takes Harris down again and wants Christian to lay down. Christian says no so Styles rolls him up for two. The camera is all over the place, making it really hard to keep up with.

Joe and Christian are in the ring now and down goes the Canadian. Off to Harris but the Cataonic and Unprettier both miss. A full nelson slam puts Christian down but Styles breaks it up. He gets caught in the Catatonic for a fast pin by Harris, making him eligible. The clock for AJ is at 1:30 by the time he gets in the cage. Harris and Cage fight on the floor so Joe throws a ladder at them.

Back to Angle vs. Joe with the fat boy taking over. Angle grabs a boot though and here are the Rolling Germans. Christian comes in and is in an ankle lock/Koquina Clutch combo. Styles gets out just in time for the save. Cage puts a ladder between the ring and barricade like a bridge. Christian falls down onto it due to a right hand by Harris to crotch him. On top of that he’s stuck there.

In the ring, AJ hits the Pele and springboard forearm to put Joe outside. Styles Clash to Angle is countered into the ankle lock but AJ breaks it, sending Kurt to the floor. AJ gets launched onto Christian onto the ladder. Harris goes up another ladder but Angle Slams him off for a pin to become eligible. Joe THINKS and throws the ladder to the floor. He beats up everyone in sight, hitting a MuscleBuster on AJ for two.

We get a ref bump in a gimmick match. Angle gets put in the choke and he taps, but there’s no referee. Christian hits Joe with a ladder and steals the pin on Kurt. Man there are some smart people in this company. The referee can’t let Harris out even though his time is up. Oh there’s another referee so it doesn’t matter. Joe stops Christian from hanging the belt and hits a huge cutter off the ladder onto the belt.

Harris goes up with the belt and people start booing. A belt shot stops Joe and he hiptosses Christian off, but Styles hits a springboard dropkick to break it up. Angle is out of the box. AJ and Joe climb on top of the box for no apparent reason. AJ kicks Joe low but Joe launches AJ off the top and through the announce table. Harris knocks Joe off the top and Christian is tossed back into the ring after climbing up as well. Harris hits a huge clothesline to kill Angle.

Everyone is down so Harris goes Terry Funk and spins around with the ladder over his head. He goes up AGAIN but Christian knocks him over and into the buckle. Christian goes up but Kurt grabs the ankle lock while the Canadian is still up there. No tap though and they fight on the ladder. Harris spears Christian off and Angle hangs the belt to become champion. How bad is it that I don’t remember him pinning anyone? I had to go back and find where he pinned Harris.

Rating: B. Good match here as the King of the Mountain was its usual insane but fun self. This is TNA’s signature match and almost as usual it gets to be a fun match. Angle winning the title and becoming the first champion is probably the right move. They waited WAY too long on pulling the trigger on Joe, but that’s TNA for you. Good main event though.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a really hard one to grade. There’s some good stuff on there for sure and the last two matches are both fun, but MY GOODNESS is this a chore to sit through. The core of this show is just exhausting and it feels like it’s never going to end. Not a horrible show at all but I’d have a remote in hand to fast forward about 60% of it, which isn’t a good thing at all.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

Slammiversary 2008
Date: June 8, 2008
Location: DeSoto Civic Center, Southaven, Mississippi
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

 

We’re actually in Mississippi but it’s called Memphis since it’s so close. Either way, this is the anniversary show and the main event is Joe defending the title in King of the Mountain, which no champion has ever retained in before. There’s also another 20 minute AJ vs. Angle match so I can’t complain much about that. These TNA shows are pretty easy to sit through actually. Let’s get to it.

 

The opening video is about how awesome Memphis is and has a guy that is supposed to sound like he’s a blues rocker. Lots of Elvis lyrics are used and we have a wedding tonight.

 

X-Division Title: Petey Williams vs. Kaz

 

Williams is champion and has Scott Steiner/Rhaka Khan with him. Petey also has a broken orbital bone so he’s in a mask. In a nice move, Kaz has on a wristlock and Petey tries to roll through it. Kaz grabs him into a rollup as he tries to for two. That looked good. They hit the mat into some pinfall reversals and Kan escapes the Destroyer attempt. Kaz gets a slingshot dropkick in the corner for no cover as Petey hits the floor.

 

Kaz fires off some kicks and the fans are split. They go to the floor and Khan distracts Kaz enough to let Petey get a tornado DDT off the apron to take over. Petey takes over but Kaz gets a sunset flip out of the corner for two. O’Connor Roll gets two and the kickout puts Kaz on the floor. Petey hits that SWEET slingshot rana to take over again. The fans are split again and it fires Kaz up a bit.

 

Petey works the arm as that comeback was pretty short lived. Kaz gets in a big kick and both guys are down. He fires off a bunch of strikes and hits a release spinebuster for two. Slingshot DDT gets the same. The fans say this is awesome and I’m not entirely sure I’d go that far. It’s good but not awesome. Williams speeds things up and the Canadian hits a Russian on the American.

 

He loads up the Destroyer but Kaz escapes. Petey hits a cool move that looks like a fisherman’s suplex but he slings backwards into a DDT instead. Kaz fights back and tries the Flux Capacitor (C4) off the top but Petey escapes that also. There’s very little selling in these matches at all. Another Destroyer attempt is countered into the Fade to Black for two.

 

Khan comes in so there’s an enziguri for you. The distraction lets Scott slide in the pipe (that’s what she said?) and Petey kills him with it. Kaz is busted but he kicks out. Destroyer attempt #8 is countered into a rollup which is countered into the Sharpshooter but Kaz counters into the Wave of the Future (spinning downward spiral) for two. The referee JUMPED over them to get there and got to three before Williams kicked out but who cares about that? Steiner distracts Kaz and it’s enough for Petey to hook the Destroyer and we’re done.

 

Rating: B-. Good opener here with both guys looking good. Kaz was getting a world title shot on Thursday so this was a bit worthless by comparison. Obviously he would lose there but that’s another story. This was fast paced but the lack of selling started to show in the middle as nothing could keep someone down for more than ten seconds.

 

Scott Steiner rants about not being on the show tonight or not getting (another) title shot. Steiner says he’s going to screw Kaz tonight. Uh………….oh there’s Abyss to keep this only rated PG-13. Steiner throws Petey at Abyss who takes the biggest Black Hole Slam EVER. There’s one for Steiner and one for Khan too.

 

We run down the card which is how we roll around here.

 

Eric Young pops up with a microphone and says Elvis is here. Oh geez.

 

Video on Nash who is guest enforcer tonight in the main event.

 

Nash is with JB and says this is all about money and Joe is more of an investment than a friend. If Joe wins tonight, Nash wins. If Joe loses tonight, Nash loses.

 

Video on how the Knockouts are better than the Divas. That’s true around this time.

 

Here are some shots of Memphis including Graceland.

 

ODB/Roxie/Gail Kim vs. Beautiful People/Moose

 

Moose is a chick that is almost as tough as Kong and is the mascot of the Beautiful People. She broke her leg in a hardcore match in an indy company and hasn’t been seen in TNA since. The Beautiful People leave Moose in the ring and she gets triple teamed. Roxie has the really short haircut here due to losing a match at Sacrifice. Gail and Moose officially start us off.

 

And make that Roxie as everything breaks down quickly. The Beautiful People try to leave but Gail and ODB don’t let them. Moose gets a flapjack for two. Off to Velvet who likes being on top of Roxie. The heels take over on Roxie and Moose hits a bad looking TKO for two. Velvet puts on an Octopus Hold and bites the hand at the same time. Hot tag to Gail who cleans house, putting all three chicks down and hitting a top rope cross body on Velvet for two.

 

Angelina takes out Kim’s bad knee and the heels take over again. They must have some time to work with here. Love works over the knee and my goodness we have psychology in a match involving breasts. Edit: breasts that don’t belong to Joe. They really are better than the Divas. Half crab goes on for a bit to work on the leg more. Moose comes in for a bridging Indian deathlock as Gail is in trouble.

 

There’s a Brock Lock (over the shoulder leg bar) but Gail gets the rope again. The referee is in a bowtie and shorts. That’s quite a look. Gail finally breaks free and there’s ODB off a tag. Thesz Press gets two on Moose and it breaks down again. ODB picks Moose up and hits a British Bulldog style powerslam for the pin.

 

Rating: C+. I liked this and the knee work was a nice touch. Gail has a bad knee coming in and the announcers pointed it out so it’s not like it was hard to miss. Little things like that one can add up a lot of points in a match and this is a good example of it. That made sense for the heels to go after and they did, showing some thinking which is a big part of psychology.

 

Video on Rhyno who says he’ll win King of the Mountain and the title.

 

Rhyno says he’s made peace with Christian (that wouldn’t last) and his second chance starts tonight.

 

We talk about LAX vs. Team 3D which is streets vs. hardcore. They’re only 20 time tag champions at this point. LAX won some way too complicated tournament final last month to get the titles and this is the rematch.

 

Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. LAX

 

3D are the heels. Knowing them though they’ll turn twice on the way to the ring though. D-Von vs. Hernandez to get us started. Ray has a chain to start but it gets taken away. I hope the referee at least said please. The fans want tables almost immediately. Good sign in the crowd: “D-Von! Get the table dancers!” The champs dominate to start but it’s off to Ray pretty quickly.

 

Ray tries to get technical with Homicide for some reason. The fans still want tables. Homicide is like cool man and grabs some armdrags to get control. Ray puts him on the top and pats his head so Homicide dropkicks him down. Hernandez clears the ring (no tag. Cheaters) and both of them dive through the ropes to take out the Dudleys. Homicide tries to go up again but D-Von shoves him down, sending his head into the railing.

 

Ray punches Hector Guerrero and knocks Salinas down. Ray holds up a title belt for some reason while D-Von works on Homicide in the ring. A back elbow puts Homicide down and the Dudleys act all innocent and nice. I miss heel teams doing things like that. Big side slam by Bubba gets no cover. Back to D-Von and the fans say 3-D sucks. I agree. It just makes some of the background clearer and the glasses make the movie darker.

 

The referee misses the hot tag and the half brothers beat Homicide even more. By trying to stop homicide, does that make them vigilantes/crime fighters? They go up top and Homicide bites the ear and hits a jawbreaker to take D-Von down. There’s the double tag and the fans do not care at all. Hernandez gets a back drop to Ray, prompting him to shout DIOS MIO!!! The delayed vertical hits D-Von for two.

 

Homicide comes back in with a top rope cross body for two. What’s Up is set up for Hernandez but Homicide makes the save. Salinas and Hernandez do What’s Up on Ray with Ray saying come on. Johnny Devine comes in and is taken out by Hector. Ok then. D-Von takes Homicide up top but Hernandez makes the save, resulting in a Gringo (Diamond) Cutter off of Hernandez’s shoulders for two. Everything breaks down again and Ray hits SuperMex low. They set for 3D but Homicide rolls up Ray while D-Von is waiting on Hernandez to turn around for the pin. I like that.

 

Rating: C. Not a great match or anything but the ending was good. The problem here I think is that we saw the same match the previous month at Sacrifice so it’s not like this is some great new idea here. Salinas’ looks are the best thing about it with the ending coming a close second. Not great but it was fine for what it was I suppose.

 

Video on Roode who says he’ll win KOTM. He got in first so he’s been able to study all of his opponents the longest. That makes sense.

 

Roode says he’s wanted to prove he’s main event material for his entire run in TNA. He looks around the locker room and sees guys that have done it rather than just talking about it. The talking stops tonight. Pretty good promo here and it was kept simple.

 

Video on Kong being awesome. Hey that was funny. She has a $25,000 challenge thing going on at the moment which would eventually be claimed by Taylor Wilde (I think). Kong is Knockout Champion here too.

 

The idea is she fights “fans” who are of course plants. JB issues the challenge and hey look it’s Serena of the Straightedge Society and Sojourner Bolt. Serena is hot with hair. Bolt goes by Josie Robinson.

 

Awesome Kong vs. Serena Deeb

 

Deeb is in street clothes. She said she had been training in MMA and tries some not MMA stuff and Kong takes over quickly. We’re out to the floor quickly and Kong swings her into the railing like a giant swing. Kong goes after Bolt too and back in we go. Implant Buster and we’re done. This was a total squash.

 

Post match Kong shoves Bolt and we’re getting a second one.

 

Awesome Kong vs. Josie Robinson

 

Josie (Bolt) jumps Kong and gets in some shots which actually work. Kong punches the post by mistake and we’re in the ring now. Never mind as the spinning back fist kills Bolt dead. There’s a clothesline and the Awesome Bomb ends this. This was a squashier squash than the first one.

 

Post mauling….Eric Young comes out. Kong is still in the ring at this point. Young brings out “Elvis” who is booed off the stage. Everyone is just waiting on Kong to eat him. The fans just do not care and it’s obvious. Young has already left and Kong is like dude….what am I doing here? There’s an Awesome Bomb and the fans couldn’t be happier. They couldn’t get Honky Tonk Man for this? I ask because of the next segment which will make that make more sense.

 

Video on Christian who says he’s getting the title back.

 

Christian says he wants to get the title back because he still loves being the best. His win/loss record is better than anyone else over the last year and he wants to be considered among the best ever after tonight.

 

We recap the wedding with Jay Lethal and So Cal Val. Sonjay Dutt has a crush on Val and is trying to steal her away. Lethal had a bachelor party with Christy in a cake which was better than most bachelor parties if nothing else.

 

First though, a picture of Beale Street which is where the blues were born.

 

There’s a minister in the ring that looks like Ian McKellen. First of all here are the groomsmen: Ace Young of American Idol, Kamala (IN A TUX!!!), Jake Roberts (see what I was getting at with the Honky Tonk….oh man Jake is bombed), Koko B. Ware (with green hair and Frankie) and George the Animal Steele…who isn’t here. Oh ok he just didn’t come down the entrance. If there’s ever been a man that lives a gimmick like him, I want to see it.

 

The maid of honor is some chick I’ve never heard of and Dutt is the best man. Yeah because THIS couldn’t go badly right? Lethal comes out to Pomp and Circumstance which is almost appropriate here. Val is indeed stunning in her dress. We get to the speak now part and nothing is said. Jay (in sunglasses) says I do. Val is about to and heeeeeeeere’s Sonjay!

 

Jay says it’s cool and Sonjay says he’s talking to Val. He asks her to marry him instead. Lethal gets in his face and a brawl breaks out. The American Idol guy comes in and gets cracked in the head for the pop of the night so far. Koko lays Dutt out for a bit so here’s Kamala. He and Koko beat on Dutt and Steele wants in too. Jake pulls out the snake (the animal one, not his) and Kamala runs in a nice bit of continuity. Dutt gets some snake and Steele has a turnbuckle. This feud would go on for about 5 months before Val FINALLY turned on Lethal for Dutt who was released soon after and it was never mentioned again.

 

Video on Booker just like the rest of the people from earlier in the night.

 

Booker talks about signing with TNA and being given nothing after he arrived. He’s coming to take the title because it’s what this is all about. We get a WWE reference and he kind of morphs into King Booker as the promo goes along.

 

We recap Kurt vs. AJ. This is about Karen and AJ allegedly having an affair. I think this is around when they were legitimately separating so this is pretty weird stuff. Kurt thought there was cheating so Kurt had his friends destroy AJ and then beat him with a chair. AJ is out for revenge.

 

Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles

 

Think this will be good? Tomko is with Angle. The fans like AJ more than Kurt. They hit the mat and guess who wins that part. AJ speeds things up and sends Angle to the floor with an armdrag. Back in and Angle tries to speed it up so AJ hits that dropkick of his to take over. Tomko talks some trash to let Angle get the fingers to the eye. Jesse Ventura is smiling somewhere off that.

 

Angle tries to speed it up again and he hits the post shoulder first. Springboard forearm puts Kurt down but he knocks AJ to the floor. Hebner stops Tomko from interfering and the bald man is gone. Kurt protests so AJ fires off a huge flip dive that Angle was too far back for so only AJ’s legs hit Kurt. It looked scary for awhile. Back in now as it’s time to get to the meat of the match.

 

AJ gets some two counts off basic moves. It’s kind of weird seeing AJ in control like this. Angle takes over and works over the back a bit as some annoying fans have those sticks with 2 on them. He fires off some forearms and AJ might be bleeding from the nose/mouth. Kurt snaps off a belly to belly and a vertical one gets two. Another backbreaker gets two. Kurt pounds away in the corner and puts him in a superplex position but AJ counters in midair almost into a gordbuster.

 

They slug it out and AJ grabs a pumphandle gutbuster for two. AJ starts in on the neck. This is Kurt’s first match back from a month off due to a neck issue. Angle busts out the rolling Germans but AJ reverses the last one and hits a release German on the American hero. A discus punch is ducked and Angle gets a release German on the American non-hero of his own.

 

Angle stalks him for the Slam and AJ is gone. Somehow he counters into a DDT as Tenay isn’t sure what Angle was going for. How did he used to be called the Professor? He sounds like Mary Ann at times. Angle rolls through a Clash into the ankle lock but AJ rolls through that. There’s the moonsault into the reverse DDT for two. AJ goes up and Angle climbs the corner and hits the belly to belly for two. Ankle lock is countered and Styles hits the Pele for two as Kurt grabs a rope.

 

Another Clash attempt is countered into the ankle lock again and it’s in the middle of the ring. These two tend to have matches based around the idea of who can hit their finisher first. The good thing: the finishers actually FINISH the matches. Well there goes the referee as AJ kicks the hold off. Angle is sent to the floor and here’s Karen with a chair. She gets Kurt’s attention but won’t let go of the chair. AJ gets up and uses the distraction to hook the Clash and gets the pin.

 

Rating: B+. Another good match here from these two but it wasn’t as good as their last man standing match from a few months later. AJ hadn’t hit his best period yet but it was coming. Their best ever was probably at Hogan’s debut show but that’s a different story. Either way this was another good match and was great for the second main event.

 

Angle pops him with the chair post match and Tomko runs interference to keep security out. The ankle lock goes on and Angle pounds away a bit.

 

Joe says he’ll keep the title. He talks about wanting it to be about wrestling and not the politics or the opportunists etc.

 

Video on the King of the Mountain match through the years. It’s kind of a mess but it’s TNA’s mess. The idea is there are five people and the referee holds the belt. You have to pin an opponent to qualify to win. The person pinned goes to the penalty box at ringside for two minutes. Once you get a pin, you’re allowed to attempt to hang the belt. As in there’s a hook above the ring like a belt would hang from in a ladder match. Now you have to take the belt and put it over the ring, hanging it up there. Make sense?

 

TNA World Title: Samoa Joe vs. Robert Roode vs. Booker T vs. Christian Cage vs. Rhyno

 

No one in history has come in as champion and left as champion. Nash is guest enforcer. Everyone gets a video on their way to the ring so this takes a LONG time. Now let’s have big match intros. The entrances for this match have been going over ten minutes already. Nash is the referee holding the belt and we’re FINALLY ready to go. It’s a big brawl all around to start with Rhyno and Christian working on Roode and Booker fighting Joe in the ring.

 

Scratch the in the ring part as they’ve switched places. Rhyno and Christian destroy Roode with a lot of double teaming but here’s Booker. Booker shoves Christian off the top to the floor and he’s holding his knee. The axe kick and Gore both miss and here’s Joe again to fight Rhyno. Joe gets a running boot and a backsplash for two as Roode makes the save. Roode tries a flying clothesline but Joe just steps to the side. I still love that.

 

Christian is back in now and the knee looks ok. He hits an inverted DDT on Roode but gets struck down by Joe. Scoop powerslam gets two for Joe. He ties the Canadian in the Tree of Woe and hammers away and is in total control here. Booker trips him up and pulls him to the floor, pounding away out there. Booker comes back in and meets Rhyno with a Book End for a pin. Booker is now eligible to hang the belt and Rhyno is in the box for two minutes.

 

He’s got the belt now and Nash isn’t happy. The ladder is brought in and Christian hits a baseball slide to send it into the faces of Booker and Joe. Christian sends Roode over the top and here’s Rhyno out of the box. He and Christian go at it even though they’re friends. Rhyno loads up the Gore but Joe trips him up and crotches him against the post. Joe is like screw it and hits a spinning dive to take out Rhyno, Booker and Roode all at once.

 

Christian is like I can top that and goes on top of the box and dives off to take out all four of those guys. Christian channels his inner Dudley and sets up a table on the floor. Back in the ring Captain Charisma has the ladder but Roode gets a chair from somewhere and pops it against the ladder into Christian’s head for the pin. Roode and Booker are now eligible. Less than thirty seconds later, Rhyno rolls up Roode to become eligible too.

 

Nash beats up Roode to make sure that he gets in the box along with Cage. Rhyno goes up with the belt but Booker makes the save. Joe hooks a cobra clutch on Booker and Cage is freed from his namesake. He goes on top of the penalty box and hits a frog splash onto Booker to become eligible and send Booker to the box. Roode is out as well. Quick recap: Everyone but Joe is eligible and Booker is in the box.

 

Roode goes up but Joe suplexes him off the ladder. Now Christian goes up and is taken right down with a big cutter off the ladder. Gore hits Joe and everyone is down. Booker is out of the box and can’t even stand up. Ok maybe he can as he grabs the belt and blasts Nash and Rhyno and Joe and Roode. Down goes Christian too, leaving Booker as the only person conscious. Since he’s mostly a heel though, he stops for a Spinarooni.

 

Nash comes into the ring and powerbombs Booker off the ladder. That makes sense given that he was provoked. Joe tries a MuscleBuster on Christian but he escapes. Joe knocks Christian through the table from earlier as Roode sets up the ladder. Roode goes up but Joe takes him down with a MuscleBuster. Joe immediately goes up and hangs the belt to retain. That was a fast ending but it was effective and smart.

 

Rating: B-. This wasn’t a classic or anything but it was a pretty solid King of the Mountain match. I don’t think many people were thinking Joe would lose here, namely due to a lack of an A-List challenger outside of maybe Booker or Christian. The idea here was how does Joe win it and he did a good job of that here. Pretty fun match despite the traditional insane rules this match has.

 

Overall Rating: B. Can’t complain much on this one as it’s a solid show all around. They didn’t try for something epic and in exchange the show worked. The big matches are good and the majority of the matches are good so there aren’t many complaints. The company was doing well in 08 and the mixture of young and old is a big reason why. Then they focused on just the old and things went downhill but that’s TNA for you. Good stuff here.

 

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Slammiversary 2013
Date: June 2, 2013
Location: Agganis Arena, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Todd Keneley, Tazz, Mike Tenay

The Aces and 8’s saga reaches the end of its first year tonight as TNA is eleven years old tonight. The main event is Sting vs. Ray in a no holds barred match for Ray’s world title with the stipulation that if Sting loses, he can never challenge for the world title again. Other than that we have a four way for the tag titles, Angle vs. Styles, and the second inductee into the TNA Hall of Fame. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about Bully Ray and Aces and 8’s, recapping the last few months of the stories and talking about the bikers taking out TNA’s heroes such as Hardy, Hogan and Sting tonight.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Kenny King vs. Suicide

King is defending and this is an Ultimate X match, meaning there’s an X made of cable above the ring. You have to climb across the cables and pull the belt down to win, making this a combination of monkey bars and a ladder match. Sabin has only been back from a knee injury for a few months and the knee really hasn’t been tested all that well. King immediately bails to the floor but both challengers follow.

Everyone quickly gets back in but Suicide is the only one to stay inside long. He teases a dive to the floor but climbs up instead, only to be pulled right back down by Sabin. King suplexes Chris down and stomps away on both guys but the numbers quickly catch up with him. Suicide suplexes both guys down but it’s Sabin up first to take over on both guys with a suplex of his own. Sabin hits yet another suplex on Suicide to drop him onto King before going for a climb.

Suicide makes a quick save as King goes for a half crab on Sabin, only to have Suicide put a modified abdominal stretch on King at the same time. Dropkicks put King and Sabin down but King is able to stop a quick Suicide climb. Sabin hits a fisherman’s buster on King out of the corner but Suicide stops Sabin from climbing. King goes up but is pulled down by Suicide as well, followed by a series of rapid fire kicks all around, leading to a springboard Blockbuster from King to Sabin to put everyone down.

Sabin and King head to the floor where Suicide takes them both down with a springboard dropkick to take both guys down. All three head back inside with Suicide shoving the other two together and try a climb with King quickly breaking it up. They load up a Tower of Doom but instead it’s a double superplex to put Suicide down. King and Suicide both go for the belt but King knocks Suicide off with a rake of the mask. Sabin goes across as well and takes King down before pulling the belt down to win at 14:08.

Rating: B-. Nothing wrong with a good old fashioned spot fest to start. This is the same idea that got WCW PPVs off to a good start and it worked here too. I still don’t think Suicide should have been here at all, but at least the right guy won and there was no major swerve at all. Good match here and a solid win for Sabin. Also thank goodness the title is off of King, but who is Sabin supposed to fight now?

Before Sabin leaves the arena, here’s Hulk of all people. He shakes hands with Sabin and tells the fans to cheer for Sabin like they cheered when he beat Andre in Boston for the first time. Just like last year, Sabin can cash in the title for a shot at Destination X. Does that show exist anymore?

Hogan stays in the ring after Sabin leaves and says we have something else to talk about, “Macho Man.” Before he can get anywhere, here are Anderson, Garrett Bischoff and Wes Brisco. Anderson tells Hogan that tonight Aces and 8’s take over. Hogan says that Boston isn’t afraid of ghosts, terrorists, or pussies wearing leather BROTHER. Hogan brags about how TNA will dominate tonight in all their matches before introducing Joe, Magnus and Hardy.

Jeff Hardy/Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. Aces and 8’s

The bikers jump Hardy as he comes in and it’s Anderson starting against him for the Aces. Jeff comes back with a clothesline and a low dropkick for two before it’s off to Brisco. He walks into a right hand of his own and here’s Garrett to take a beating of his own. Off to Joe to a big pop to beat the tar out of Garrett in the corner with a rapid flurry of chops, punches and stomps.

Back to Anderson to face Magnus with the Brit hitting a big boot but getting clotheslined down. Anderson goes to an armbar before Brisco comes in with a suplex for no cover. Back to the armbar for a bit before Anderson comes in to drop some knees on said arm. Brisco comes in again but gives up the advantage, allowing Magnus to make the hot tag to Jeff.

After some dancing (I think?) from Jeff he cleans house on the bikers and gets two off the Whisper in the Wind. Everything breaks down and a bad looking Twist of Fate puts Brisco down, but it’s Garrett in to break up the Swanton. Magnus and Joe come in for the snapmare/middle rope elbow combo on Garrett, but Brisco hits Magnus low. He rolls the Brit up but Hardy comes off the top with the Swanton for the pin on Wes at 10:11.

Rating: B-. The match wasn’t bad up until the VERY hot ending which brought it up a lot. That low blow actually had me thinking Aces would win here, so well done on making me believe that the ending was up in the air. The match was better than I was expecting on top of that, so good stuff here again.

Quick video on Sting putting his career on the line to win the world title from several years ago.

Joseph Park talks about being here for his first anniversary in TNA and sucks up to the Boston crowd before D-Von and Knux jump him from behind.

Gut Check Tournament Final: Sam Shaw vs. Jay Bradley

The winner of this gets into the Bound For Glory Series. Shaw speeds things up to start and tries for a quick pin, only to be shoved down by the much more powerful Bradley. Sam hooks a headlock on the mat but Jay pops up and pounds him down with elbows to the head. A hard whip into the corner has Shaw down again and the pace slows down a lot. Off to a chinlock for a bit before Shaw hits a standing Thesz Press to pound Jay in the head. The fans don’t seem all that impressed here as Bradley pokes him in the eye to break up a neckbreaker. The Boom Stick Lariat ends Shaw for the pin at 4:58.

Rating: D. This was pretty unpleasant as the fans didn’t care about either guy whatsoever and it showed badly. Bradley definitely was the better choice here as Shaw looks like any other indy guy. The fans had no reasons to care about either guy here and it really brought things to a halt. Thankfully it was kept short and now the show can pick up again.

Christy asks Bradley how it feels to be in the BFG Series. “How do you think it feels? GOOD!” Bradley says he’ll win the world title.

Aries and Roode praise each other and Roode says that Gunner is no Bobby Roode.

We recap Joseph Park going crazy and morphing into Abyss mode to earn a TV Title shot.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Joseph Park

Park doesn’t show up due to the beatdown from earlier tonight so D-Von talks some trash about the Boston Celtics. D-Von demands a ten count for Park to get out here….and there’s still no Park so D-Von retains.

D-Von of course makes the eternal mistake of running his mouth, saying that if Abyss was here, he’d take a beating like Park would have. You all know what’s coming next.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Abyss

Abyss cleans house of Knux and kicks D-Von in the face as the bell rings. Knux interferes from the floor to let D-Von get in a forearm to the face and take over with some very basic offense. Knee drops and right hands abound but a middle rope splash misses the monster. Abyss hits a splash in the corner followed by a chokeslam and the Black Hole Slam for the pin and the title at 3:49.

Rating: D. The match was barely there but it was the right result. D-Von has done nothing at all with the title in the six months he’s held it so maybe Abyss will actually defend the thing. If nothing else the split personalities deal is interesting when you add in a title. Nothing to see here, but that wasn’t the point of the match.

We look at Sting beating Angle for the title in the main event of Bound For Glory.

Here’s Dixie to announce the second Hall of Fame inductee. After thanking all of the fans, Dixie calls the roster to the stage for the announcement. The inductee is……..Kurt Angle.

We get a nice video package on Angle’s TNA career, complete with a miniature shot of Angle watching the video in the ring. Dixie congratulates Kurt and gives a brief history of his career before handing the mic off to Kurt. Angle thanks his family and everyone else you would expect him to thank. He also thanks the TNA originals which is the right thing to do.

We look at Sting winning the world title at BFG 08.

Bad Influence says that they’ll win the tag titles tonight because they’re just that awesome.

Tag Titles: James Storm/Gunner vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero vs. Bad Influence vs. Bobby Roode/Austin Aries

Chavo and Hernandez are defending, this is under elimination rules and Storm has a badly hurt leg. Chavo and Daniels get things going with Daniels getting caught between right hands from both champions. Off to SuperMex to face Aries, with the latter jumping into a fall away slam. Back to Chavo who immediately pulls the now legal Roode into a headlock. Off to Storm vs. Roode and James can actually move. He throws a few right hands to take Roode down and it’s off to Gunner.

Bobby tags in Gunner as everything breaks down. Hernandez puts Roode on his shoulder for the backbreaker but Chavo suplexes Aries onto Hernandez’s other shoulder for a double backbreaker. That’s SCARY power. Storm and Gunner whip Roode and Aries into each other before Bad Influence comes in to stomp both guys down. Hernandez gets a running start to jump over the top rope and clothesline both guys down for two on Daniels. Kaz breaks up the delayed suplex on Daniels with a kick to Hernandez’s back before coming in legally.

After some more kicks to the legs of Hernandez it’s off to Roode for a stomping in the corner. Aries comes in with the slingshot hilo for two before putting on a front facelock. The fans chant for Aries but Hernandez suplexes both Aries and Roode down at the same time. Kaz gets the tag but Chavo comes in as well to clean house. There are Three Amigos to Kaz but Daniels sneaks in for Angel’s Wings on Chavo. Hernandez runs over Aries and Border Tosses Kaz, allowing the frog splash from Chavo to connect. Daniels breaks it up with a title belt for a DQ elimination at 10:52.

Aries immediately rolls up Chavo for the elimination at 11:10, leaving us with Aries/Roode and Storm/Gunner. Aries and Roode double team Gunner in the corner but he comes back with some running clotheslines. There’s the tag to Storm who pounds away on Roode and DDTs Aries down. Back to Gunner who catapults Aries into a Storm DDT for two. There’s the Gun Rack (Torture Rack) to Roode but Aries kicks Gunner in the ribs to break it up. The spinebuster from Roode sets up the 450 from Aries but it’s only good for two. Roode throws in a title belt but it’s the Last Call and Gun Rack to Aries for the submission and the titles at 16:28.

Rating: B. Another good match as this show is on a roll so far. I’m glad Storm is healthy enough to do the limited stuff he could do out there and Gunner looked solid as well. Hopefully we never have to see the other three teams fight again as the feud has been done to death already as the tag titles just need fresh blood now.

Brooke Hogan is proud of the Knockouts but won’t say if she still loves Bully or not.

We recap Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell. Basically Gail went nuts and hurt a lot of Knockout’s knees with Taryn being a favorite target of hers. Tonight it’s a Last Knockout Standing match.

Taryn Terrell vs. Gail Kim

Gail attacks in the corner to start but Taryn comes back with clotheslines to take over. Gail puts on an octopus hold but lets it go early and only gets a six count. Kim goes to the floor for a chair but has it kicked out of her hands. Some hair drags keep Gail down for a few moments but she manages to get the chair up to block a high cross body. Gail is up first and goes after the knee for a bit before wedging the chair between the ropes. Taryn blocks a ram into the chair but gets caught in the Figure Four around the post.

Terrell is up at 8 and dodges Gail’s charge into the corner, sending her head first into the chair in a SICK looking crash. That only gets eight so Taryn puts her in the Figure Four around the post for eight more. Taryn misses a charge and lands on the ramp for nine, only to be caught in a legsweep onto the ramp for nine more. Gail tries a piledriver but gets reversed into a bulldog off the ramp to put both girls down. Taryn beats the count for the win at 9:18.

Rating: B-. This was the best Knockouts match in YEARS. The bulldog off the stage was a bigger spot but the missed charge into the chair should have been the finish. It looked MUCH more painful and I thought Gail was out cold. Still though, very entertaining match and I was really impressed with Taryn here. I’d bet on her vs. Mickie at BFG for the title in a veteran vs. underdog title match.

Sting beat Anderson for the title in 2010 as well.

We recap AJ Styles becoming a whiny man and getting in a brawl with an overly aggressive Kurt, setting up their match tonight.

AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle

AJ has some new very slow music about changing his ways. Kurt is coming in with a taped up leg. Styles tries a leg takedown on Kurt which goes as well as you would expect it to go. Instead they head to the floor with AJ sliding back in for a baseball slide to send Angle into the barricade. Back in and Angle stomps away but AJ kicks at the bad knee to take him down. AJ connects with a springboard dropkick into the knee before hitting a regular one to Angle’s face.

Styles tries for a half crab but gets reversed into an ankle lock for a few moments. A big clothesline puts AJ down but Kurt can’t follow up. They slug it out until Angle hits a t-bone suplex for two. AJ comes back with a spinebuster and a Lionsault for two. Angle comes back with rolling Germans including a release on the last one. AJ rolls to the apron and Stuns Angle over the top rope, followed by a slingshot splash for two.

Styles goes up to but but Kurt runs up the corner into a belly to back superplex, only to have AJ land on his feet. AJ charges at Angle but runs right into an overhead belly to belly to send Aj into the buckles. Styles pops up with a spinning backfist and a clothesline to put Angle down again. AJ tries a springboard dropkick but gets caught with a low blow and an Angle Slam for two.

Angle tries the ankle lock but AJ counters into his Calf Killer leg lock. Angle reverses into the ankle lock and grapevines the leg but Styles turns it over and kicks out of the hold. Angle misses a charge into the post and gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a dropkick to the ribs from Styles. The springboard 450 misses but the Angle Slam is countered into a rollup which is countered into a double leg takedown into a cover by Angle for the pin at 15:48.

Rating: B. Good match here but I don’t see why Angle needed to win. The guy is already in the Hall of Fame, so don’t you think he could go without winning a major match like this? AJ still looks good and the Calf Killer is a good finisher….if it had actually finished a guy with a bad leg that is. Good match with bad thinking here.

Ray talks about how a no holds barred match is his kind of match. He talks about various moves being banned, with one in particular being the piledriver. That’s what Ray plans to beat Sting with tonight because it’ll break Sting’s neck.

There isn’t much of a story here. Sting is TNA’s white knight and is trying to take the power back from Aces and 8’s.

TNA World Title: Sting vs. Bully Ray

This is no holds barred and if Sting loses, he can never challenge for the title again. Sting hits a Stinger Splash in the corner to start and pounds on Ray with the title belt on the floor. Back in and they slug it out with Sting clotheslining Ray down. A chop puts Ray down again and Sting beats him in the back with the belt again. They head back to the floor with Sting missing a Stinger Splash into the barricade. Ray whips Sting into the steps and the champion is in full control.

Ray fires off some clotheslines but misses a chair shot against the post. Sting whacks Ray in the spine with the chair a few times and the champ is down on the ramp. Cue Brooke Hogan in terror but Sting tells her to go to the back. Ray comes back with a low blow and more chair shots to Sting’s back, followed by a big boot to send the chair into Sting’s face. The piledriver connects for two so it’s table time. Did you expect anything else from a Dudley? A big old powerbomb through the table kills Sting dead but it’s only good for two here.

In something new, Ray gets a knife and cuts the ring apart, exposing the wood under the canvas. A piledriver onto said wood only gets two and Ray is shocked. Sting hits a quick backdrop to get himself a breather but is quickly taken down by Ray. The senton backsplash misses though and Sting hits the Death Drop onto the wood but here are the rest of the Aces for the save. Sting fights them off as they’re just the Aces and 8’s and hits Ray in the face with the chain but D-Von makes the save. Anderson throws Ray the hammer and a shot with that to the head is enough for Ray to retain at 14:27.

Rating: C+. Yeah it was a garbage brawl but that’s what Sting does best anymore. It continues to amuse me that Hogan preaches coming together to fight off Aces and 8’s but has no issue with letting Sting fight off like six guys at once. I don’t think anyone expected Sting to win here so it’s hard to complain much here. Cutting up the ring was a nice touch too.

Aces and 8’s celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This was TNA’s best show in a very long time. The only bad matches are less than five minutes each and we had three new champions tonight. The ending was what was expected and while I would have liked something different, it is what it is. I had a good feeling about this show as the card looked good despite the lame build up on television. The problem now is that we have four and a half months before Bound For Glory, which means a lot of slow paced television as TNA will likely take three months off before really getting going on things.

Results

Chris Sabin b. Kenny King and Suicide – Sabin pulled down the belt

Jeff Hardy/Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Aces and 8’s – Swanton Bomb to Brisco

Jay Bradley b. Sam Shaw – Boom Stick Lariat

Abyss b. D-Von – Black Hole Slam

James Storm/Gunner b. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez, Bad Influence and Bobby Roode/Austin Aries – Gun Rack to Aries

Kurt Angle b. AJ Styles – Rollup

Bully Ray b. Sting – Hammer to the head

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon at:

 

Hard Justice 2005
Date: May 15, 2005
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 775
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

Final PPV in this three show set as we have AJ in the main event as he should have been most of this year. We also have a celebrity guest referee for that main event in the form of MMA legend Tito Ortiz. I can live with celebrities if they’re, you know, actual celebrities. Also on this card we have a twenty man Gauntlet For The Gold for the #1 contendership which should be dull. Let’s get to it.

We open the show with a ten bell salute to Chris Candido who died following a freak accent at the previous PPV. He broke his leg and somehow it messed up the blood flow. I don’t remember it exactly.

The opening video is about how war is human nature.

Team Canada vs. Apollo/Sonny Siaki

Apollo is a Puerto Rican guy I think. This is Williams/Young instead of Roode/Young. Siaki is a Samoan but not related to the famous Samoan family. The Canadians jump them to start but get knocked to the floor just as fast. We officially start with Apollo vs. Williams. Off to Siaki quickly who speeds things up. Neckbreaker gets two on Young. The non-Canadians hit one of the biggest backdrops I’ve ever seen on Young.

D’Amore screams at the announcers about something. That distracts Apollo and the Canadians take over. Elbow gets two for Young. Apollo manages to get in a knee lift which is enough to bring in both Siaki and Williams. Powerslam gets two on Williams. D’Amore hooks the foot of Siaki on a suplex attempt but it only gets two. Apollo spears Young down but he gets caught in a pretty awful looking top rope rana by Williams. With everything falling apart, A-1 (another Canadian) runs in and Jackhammers Siaki so Williams can steal the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener but the match itself was nothing of note. Apollo and Siaki both looked great but they didn’t have much going for them other than that. Apollo went back to Puerto Rico soon and was a much bigger deal. Siaki wasn’t around much longer, at least not in anything important.

Ortiz, AJ and Jarrett all arrived earlier today.

Matt Bentley/Trinity vs. Chris Sabin/Traci

Tenay calls a mixed tag a very unique match in professional wrestling. Has he never watched Wrestlemania 6? These are two rivalries that were joined into one match. Michael Shane has changed his name back to Matt Bentley again too. The genders can mix here but we start with the girls. Trinity slaps her and it’s time for a chase scene. I think Traci is on the good guys’ team but I really don’t know.

They exchange small packages for about 15 seconds until Traci gets the advantage. Monkey flip puts Trinity down for two. Off to the guys even though I don’t think Sabin was tagged in. Cradle Shock is countered as is Bentley’s superkick. Trinity interferes and Shane suplexes him off the top. Trinity trips Sabin again as we’re waiting on the hot tag to Traci. This might not be the best formulated plan.

Sabin fires off some elbows but Bentley pulls him back down by the hair. After a chinlock by Bentley, Sabin comes back with an elbow and tries a tornado DDT. Bentley escapes that but a BIG enziguri puts Bentley down. Double tags bring in the girls and Traci cleans house. She tries something off the top but Trinity shoves her to the floor. They fight up the ramp and Trinity slams her. The guys have been forgotten it appears. Oh here’s Sabin to clothesline Bentley. Trinity hits a top rope rana on Sabin, drawing a Lita chant. Traci low blows Sabin and Bentley superkicks Trinity. Another one to Sabin gets the pin.

Rating: C-. Not great here and while the ending was surprising, that doesn’t mean I really care about it. Traci and trinity feuded for the better part of eternity and it never really had a definitive conclusion that I remember. This wasn’t bad but it pretty much came and went with whatever the new development was in the story.

Ad for Slammiversary.

Team Canada says they’re back. D’Amore gets in a great jab at the Orlando fans: “You’ve got a Samoan and a Puerto Rican in there against two Canadians and the idiots chant USA.” They plug their chances in the Gauntlet for the Gold tonight. Roode is the first entrant. They see the name of the second entrant and say it’s like sending a one legged man into a butt kicking contest.

Dusty meets with Tito Ortiz and tells him to call things down the line but if he needs to take matters into his own hands, don’t hesitate.

Jeff Hardy isn’t here (legit no show, he was suspended soon after) so Raven says he doesn’t care who his replacement is. He wants to maim someone. Raven knows his opponent but they keep censoring his name.

Raven vs. ???

This is a Clockwork Orange House of Fun match, which means there are a bunch of weapons and one side of a cage. West says the opponent is Sean Waltman before the entrances. So why censor it a few seconds ago? Waltman comes from the other side of the arena to jump Raven from behind. He pulls down a trashcan and knocks Raven to the outside with it. Raven is busted open early.

Waltman uses Raven’s drop toehold into the trashcan but the can is used to break up the Bronco Buster. Out to the floor and Raven digs into the forehead in an attempt to cut Waltman open. He rakes the head across the steel and Waltman is indeed busted. Raven gets a pair of trashcan lids and alternates with shots from both arms. Raven is cut bad. Waltman sends Raven into a can out of desperation.

Raven grabs the ankle (which is a recurring move for him it seems) but Sean escapes and hits the Bronco Buster this time. Out to the floor and it’s table time. Waltman puts him on the table and climbs up onto the post (squeezing between two of the things holding up weapons) and hits a flip dive through Raven through the table. Back in Raven hits a DDT out of nowhere for two. You know for a finisher, that move doesn’t finish all that often.

Raven runs him up the ramp and throws Waltman off of it, sending him through a table. It’s falls count anywhere apparently and Raven gets two. Back at ringside and Raven finds handcuffs, another recurring thing in this company’s early PPV days. He cuffs Waltman to the post and beats him with a kendo stick.

He wants a submission but Waltman says to hit him harder. Dusty comes back and frees Waltman and he can kick the chair that Raven had back into his face. Now he hits the alternating lid shots and beats Raven with the stick. Waltman staple guns Raven’s head but Raven manages to throw him through the cage wall and fall on top for the pin.

Rating: B-. Better brawling match than you would expect here but the big problem was the lack of a feud for this to go off of. That’s not their fault of course as Waltman was a substitute so I’m certainly not going to hold that one against them. Much better match than I was expecting as Waltman proves again that he can go with the smaller guys much better than the large one.

Tito gives AJ some instructions, as in basic rules of the match. They shake hands.

We recap the 3 Live Kru vs. Outlaw feud. Outlaw is Billy Gunn who is apparently trying to break up the Kru. Monty Brown recently turned on DDP so let’s have a tag match. This resulted in a bunch of problems in the Kru, mainly over the possibility that BG is going to bail on the Kru and reform the New Age Outlaws.

Page has a message from BG James, saying he’s not here. Truth pops up and says he’ll be Page’s partner.

Ron Killings/Diamond Dallas Page vs. Monty Brown/Kip James

Page starts with Brown and there’s not much going on in the first minute. Rollup gets one for Page. Nothing has happened in the first minute or so. Well nothing of note that is. Off to Outlaw who wants Killings. Wait is his name Outlaw or Kip James? We’ll go with Kip James. Killings knocks him around and hits a headscissors to send James to the corner. Kip comes back with a tilt-a-whirl slam and I think we have our face in peril.

Brown hits a running knee to his back and Killings is in trouble. Back to James who gets two off a running forearm. We hit the chinlock so Page plays cheerleader. Truth hits a leg lariat out of nowhere and makes a diving tag. Discus lariat takes Brown down and another does the same to James. Helicopter Bomb gets two on Brown as James makes the save. DDP and truth keep up the offense until Phi Delta Slam (big fat guys) run in for the beating on Page. DDP Diamond Cuts one and crotches the other before Cutting him off the top. Cutter for James but Brown Pounces him for the pin.

Rating: D+. HOW WAS THAT NOT A DQ??? Two more guys came in and beat up Page but there’s not a DQ in there? I’d love to be a referee just to see how messed up my mind becomes. It must be better than any other drug you could ever have. Not a great match but that’s par for the course with these filler tag matches.

The Naturals say they were shocked by Candido’s death and they owe their titles to him. They don’t want to go into specifics about their feelings though. He taught them how to be a great team and how to be winners.

Tag Titles: The Naturals vs. America’s Most Wanted

The Naturals are one of the most generic looking teams you’ll ever find so I’ll do my best to tell them apart. They’re defending here and have never lost to AMW with the titles on the line. The champs come out with Candido’s signature yellow towel. The fans chant for Candido to start. If the ending wasn’t obvious already, it better be now. Storm starts with I think Chase Stevens (the other is Andy Douglas).

La Majistral gets two for Stevens. Storm controls on the mat with an armbar and it’s off to Harris. Ok so Stevens is the blonde. Got it. Stevens gets two off a facejam on Storm. Middle rope sunset flip gets two for Storm as does a hard kick to the chest. Bulldog gets two for Harris. Harris clotheslines Douglas to the floor and everything breaks down out there. AMW seems to have the advantage.

Never mind as Storm misses a dive and lands on the railing. He manages to counter a whip to send Stevens upside own into the railing. A suplex on the ramp puts Stevens down again. Douglas takes a slingshot into the post and it’s one advantage per team at the moment. Douglas goes shoulder first into the post as does Storm. Now Harris’ shoulder goes into the post. Hopefully they get a cut of the shoulder surgery fees.

A fan holds up a chair for Storm to whip Stevens into. Did I warp back to ECW? Douglas hits Harris in the ribs with a chair but it’s still not a DQ. They haven’t been in the ring for almost five minutes. The Naturals are both in control and Harris is sent back in with Douglas. They’re not legal but who cares? Harris comes out of nowhere with a right hand and a clothesline in the corner.

The Naturals have a two on one advantage now but Storm comes back in for the Eye of the Storm on Stevens. Everyone gets up and we go to the corner for a pretty low level Tower of Doom. The idea of tagging has been completely forgotten here. Catatonic is countered into an FU by Stevens for two. Storm breaks up Natural Disaster and superkicks Stevens. They load up the Death Sentence but Harris gets shoved off the top, allowing Stevens to roll up Storm and put his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C+. The match was fun but the lack of tagging so early got kind of old. I’ve seen worst though and AMW was always worth looking at. They were starting to slip at this point though and would turn heel soon if my memory serves me right. This was nothing great though and I don’t think anyone cared about the Naturals.

Tito Ortiz beats up an annoying security guard and talks to Jeff. Everything is cool apparently.

We recap the X Title match. Shocker won an Xscape match at Lockdown and then had to win another one to get the shot against Daniels tonight. He says he’ll win the title for Mexico.

X-Division Title: Shocker vs. Christopher Daniels

Feeling out process to start with Daniels having a slight advantage. They head to the apron and Shocker hits a headscissors to take Daniels to the floor, followed by a suicide dive. Back in Daniels takes over and hooks a very quick Koji Clutch. Shocker comes back with a lot of chops and some clotheslines. Frog splash gets two.

Daniels plays possum and hits a Downward Spiral to get momentum back again. BME is overshot so he settles for a split legged moonsault which gets two. Shocker hits a low dropkick to the face of Daniels and the champ is in trouble again. Shocker goes up but Daniels nails him and tries a superplex.

That gets countered into a SICK looking gordbuster with Daniels landing straight on his head. Off to an STF but Daniels bites the hand to escape. Now Shocker tries a superplex but Daniels counters into Angel’s Wings off the top to retain. Cool ending and thankfully he didn’t kick out like the announcers implied he might.

Rating: C+. I wasn’t wild on this, again mainly due to a lack of story. This was something that WCW did a lot back in the day: bring in a foreign guy and say he’s one of the best in whatever country then have the champion beat him. It’s cool to bring in international talent but at the same time, those names are just names to people who aren’t familiar with wrestling in that country. Decent match with a cool ending though.

Video on the Gauntlet For The Gold, which is a Royal Rumble style match but in the end the final two have a singles match for the win. Abyss won the final spot (#20) on Impact.

Gauntlet For The Gold

Roode is #1 and the surprise entrant Zach Gowen is #2. Get the joke from earlier now? Roode steals the prosthetic leg. West: “Put it back!” but Gowen comes back with one footed dropkicks and a reverse DDT. Eric Young comes in at #3. The intervals are only a minute long which includes their time coming to the ring. Remember at this point it’s over the top to eliminate people.

Roode gets a pretty evil one legged giant swing on Gowen. Cassidy Riley is #4. Ok now the clock doesn’t start until he gets to the ring. He helps against the Canadians and Gowen hits a leg lariat on Roode. Here’s Skipper at #5 and the clock is under Young rules again. Skipper takes a lariat from Roode but hits a nice moonsault to take him down. The ring is getting a little full now so everyone has something to do.

Shark Boy comes in at #6 to a nice reaction. Thank goodness he’s not Stone Cold yet. He won a match on the preshow to get in. Sharky hits a neckbreaker on Young but Gowen takes him down. Shark Boy bites Gowen hard enough that Gowen goes out. So we have our first elimination. #7 is another Canadian in the form of A-1, the big power guy. He cleans house with clotheslines and stomps on Riley.

#8 is Chris Sabin. In a Matrix style move, he sets for a tornado DDT on Young but with his feet in the air, he kicks EVERYONE ELSE in the chest in a big circle before hitting the DDT. That was cool. Petey Williams is #9 to put the Canadians at full strength. He tries a Destroyer on Sharky but gets backdropped to the apron. Shark Boy goes after him and is eliminated by A-1. Eric puts out Riley to get some people out of the ring.

Sonny Siaki is #10 and he goes after the Canadians. Skipper gets REALLY stupid and tries to walk the ropes. Roode is like boy you’re stupid and clotheslines him out. Lance Hoyt is #11 and he has his own cheering section. Young is easily tossed out by Hoyt and Team Canada is down to three. Sabin can’t get Williams out and Bentley is #12. He superkicks Hoyt but is taken out by Sabin who goes out at the same time. They fight on the floor as the Canadians put out Siaki.

Here’s Jerelle Clark at #13. He’s just an X-Division guy. There are five people in at the moment: Roode, A-1, Williams, Clark and Hoyt. The Canadians help Williams on a Destroyer to put Clark out. Mikey Batts is #14 and he fires off some kicks to take down the Canadians. He’s another X-Division guy. He and Hoyt team up on Canada as The Outlaw Kip James is #15.

A HUGE cobra clutch slam kills Batts and the fans want to see it again. #16 is Trytan but Hoyt hits a big boot before Trytan even gets in. Batts is gone. Trytan is chokeslamming everyone in sight and hits a spinebuster on Hoyt. Ron Killings is #17 and gets powerslammed very quickly. As Trytan poses, all three Canadians team up to throw him out.

Apollo is #18 and he cleans house. He and Kip chop it out but Apollo charges and is low bridged out. BG James is #19 but the Canadians break up the staredown between the Outlaws. Hoyt kicks Roode out but Roode helps A-1 to get rid of Hoyt. The Outlaws team up on Petey and A-1, tossing them both out. Abyss comes in at #20 and knocks both Outlaws out to get us down to the final two.

So it’s Truth vs. Abyss for the shot and it’s a regular one on one match, meaning over the top doesn’t mean anything anymore. Abyss throws him to the floor anyway and tries to hit him with a chair but it’s taken away by the referee. Back inside now and Abyss pounds on Killings in the corner. Truth speeds things up and hits a leg lariat and a headbutt for two. Abyss gets a big boot and brings in the chain but that gets taken away.

Instead he’ll use a chair because the referee takes forever to put the chain in the corner. Truth gets the chair and hits Abyss twice in the head for two. We actually get a ref bump in this match. Is this really needed? Truth checks on him and walks into a chokeslam onto the chair for a very delayed two. Abyss tries to Earthquake down onto the chair onto Killings but Truth crotches him on the chair instead. Not that it matters though as Killings jumps into the Black Hole Slam and it’s over.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t a horrible battle royal and the one minute intervals keep things moving fast enough. I’m not sure how much I like the one on one match at the end but it’s not a terrible idea I guess. Still though, like most non-Rumbles, this wasn’t a very interesting battle royal. Not awful though.

We recap the main event which is based around the idea of AJ being a once in a generation athlete while Jarrett is the old guard. AJ beat Abyss to get this shot. Tito Ortiz is the referee.

NWA World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. AJ Styles

Tito Ortiz is guest referee. Jarrett has been champion almost a year at this point. As is customary in wrestling, the previous title reigns of the challenger are only brushed over. They fight over a lockup to start and Tito breaks things up when they get to the ropes. Feeling out process to start as they’re treating this like a huge match. AJ speeds things up which of course gives him the advantage.

Jarrett slides to the floor which is a good idea for him as it slows the match down a lot. Back in and Jeff throws right hands. Jeff tells Tito that they were forearms. That’s so Memphis and it’s a great way to get heat on you. AJ kicks him down and hits a knee drop for two. Jarrett goes for the knee but can’t do a lot of damage on it as Styles fights back. Jeff kicks the knee out again and hooks the Figure Four.

Tenay talks about how Jeff’s strategy is to go after the leg early. He doesn’t think there will be a submission here but it’s going to slow AJ down for later on. And THAT IS WHAT A COMMENTATOR SHOULD BE DOING!!! Not talking about pigeons, but giving us some insight. That’s not something a lot of people would pick up on so Tenay gave some analysis. Why is that never done anymore?

AJ turns it over but is skeptical about coming off the top due to the bad knee. Instead of a dive he hits a tornado DDT and hits a discus clothesline (that’s a popular move in TNA) to send Jarrett to the floor. AJ jumps to the apron but Jeff takes the knee out again. Ortiz counts but Jeff keeps breaking it up. Tito grabs Jeff by the throat and shoves him to the corner.

They head to the floor again and Jeff gets the guitar. Tito says yeah try it and AJ steals the guitar. Tito won’t let AJ use it either so Styles slams it on the ground to break it. AJ pounds away on Jeff and we go back in. There’s the springboard forearm and a spin kick, followed by the moonsault into the reverse DDT for two. AJ tries a rana but gets caught in a powerbomb for two.

They trade some counters until AJ gets two off a backslide and small package. AJ tries the Pele but can’t quite get it so it’s more like a knee to Jeff’s face. Stroke is countered so Jeff hits a Styles Clash to Styles for two. AJ fights back and tries one of his own but here’s Monty Brown. He accidentally Pounces Jeff but Tito is throwing Brown out. A second referee comes out but Tito won’t let him count. Jeff hits AJ low and loads up a superplex but Tito pulls him down for the low blow. Jeff shoves Tito and gets knocked out so that the Spiral Tap can give Styles the title.

Rating: B-. It was good but certainly not great. It’s hard not to look at this with hindsight but you kind of have to. AJ would lose the title at the next PPV and wouldn’t win it back for over four years. Jarrett would get the world title back in a few months until Christian debuted and took the title to end the year.

A big celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a pretty solid show with a big moment to end it. There’s nothing bad on here and it would have seemed like it set up AJ’s next challenger (that wouldn’t be Abyss) and there was nothing really bad. It’s no classic or anything, but if you’re looking for an ok TNA PPV to watch, this isn’t a bad choice.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Sacrifice 2007
Date: May 13, 2007
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 900
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

This is a very interesting show and it’s a pretty important show in company history. The NWA has basically thrown TNA out because the NWA is really stupid and thinks those three letters are enough to carry them. Therefore, the titles aren’t officially the NWA world/tag titles anymore and I don’t think there are physical belts. The NWA bailed because they’re stupid, so the main event is for the world title with Christian vs. Sting vs. Angle. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how we praise wrestlers like gods even though they’re just humans. They have drive though which is why they’re better than us.

All of the title matches are in triple threat matches tonight. Just what I wanted.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Jay Lethal

Sabin is champion. Sonjay is jealous because Lethal has been getting the attention when they’re both around Nash. The fans like Lethal. Sabin immediately gets psychological on them, dropping to the mat. Dutt goes for the cover and Lethal says not so fast my friend, channeling his inner Corso. They argue for a bit and then the double teaming begins. That doesn’t last long as they keep arguing. The story here is obvious: they both want the title so they can’t work together.

The times they do work together are pretty solid though, including one instance where they throw him over the top rope to the floor, where he bounces off the concrete and into the railing. The two good guys fly around a bit without making any violent contact. Translation: it’s more like a dance recital than a match. Dutt grabs a one armed camel clutch but Sabin runs back in for a seated dropkick to Lethal’s face.

Sabin and Dutt seem to form a bond so they do the same thing that just happened, but Dutt dropkicks Sabin this time. Cute spot. Sabin takes over and makes the faces miss before hitting a headscissors/tornado DDT combo with Lethal taking the storm-themed move. Dutt is sent to the floor and Sabin hammers on Lethal a bit. Dutt breaks that up with a sweet looking reverse 619 to the leg kind of move.

Lethal goes up and hits a top rope double axe to the floor on Sabin. Dutt tops that with a big old Asai Moonsault to the floor. Back in, Sabin can’t get a top rope rana and Dutt half kills Lethal with a middle rope missile dropkick. There’s a new TNA mascot named Stomper, who I think is a crab. I wonder if he’s Mongolian. Dutt tries to take over but Lethal takes him down, only to have Lethal get knocked down by Sabin. Why am I so chatty in this review? I haven’t written this much in less than 15 minutes of a show in I don’t know how long.

Everyone is down now, presumably due to needing a chance to breathe. Dutt speeds things way up and hits a springboard seated senton (called a Thesz Press by Tenay) to Lethal for two. Sabin takes over again and puts them both in the corner with Dutt looking like he’s in a Styles Clash position from Lethal. Lethal’s hair has kind of exploded and you can see where going to the braided hair was the best thing he could have done.

The fans are split between Lethal and Sabin. What’s with the anti-Indian stance of the fans? Sue them for racism!!! Standing enziguri to Sabin, making him look like he’s having a seizure, or that he’s Elvis. Not sure which but either way a superkick puts him down. A release dragon suplex puts Dutt on the floor and the top rope elbow gets two as Dutt makes a late save (he hit Lethal in the ankle. How does that break up a pin?).

Lethal Combination gets two as Dutt dives off the top with the 450 for the save. He can’t pin either guy but he made up for the weak save a minute ago at least. This match is pretty freaking awesome if you couldn’t tell based on what I’m saying. The good guys get in another argument, allowing Sabin to roll up Dutt (I think with tights) for the pin to retain. Lethal would get the belt next month.

Rating: B. Very fun opener here. This wasn’t about being technically sound, but rather about being all over the place and incredibly entertaining, which is exactly what they did here. Dutt vs. Lethal went on for like a year and it never was all that good. Fun match here, although I have a feeling the rest of the show isn’t going to be able to top it, which isn’t good.

Lethal and Dutt brawl post match until Nash comes out for the save. Dutt kicks Nash in the leg and runs.

Roodes doesn’t want to talk about Eric Young. Instead he says Jeff Jarrett is nothing compared to him. Jarrett is going to make Roode tonight.

Nash comes up to the announce table and says he’ll take care of Sonjay on Thursday.

We run down the card to fill some time.

VKM was at a meet and greet earlier today with fans when Basham/Damaja attacked them. Roadie was injured due to getting his head slammed into the floor so tonight it’s a handicap match.

We recap Jarrett vs. Roode. Jarrett hadn’t been around since losing to Sting at Bound For Glory, which was mainly due to his wife being sick, resulting in her death ten days after this show. Jarrett had come back at Lockdown and then was revealed as Eric Young’s friend who was helping Young after he was signed by Roode.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Robert Roode

Brooks is in a neck brace due to something not important enough to be explained to us. Big ovation for Jarrett. Roode runs up the aisle as the pyro is still going and jumps Jeff before the bell. A piledriver on the floor is of course countered because it would, you know, cripple Jarrett. We get the opening bell and Jeff hammers away and struts. Brooks trips Jarrett up and we head to the floor again.

Jeff is sent into the steps and we hear about how Jeff might be a bit off tonight because this is his first singles match in over six months. Backslide gets two for Jarrett but Roode stops his momentum with a lariat. Roode goes up and jumps into a boot which was an annoying trend he had during this heel run. We look at the mascot again (instead of Brooks who is, you know, not an animal) and Jeff hits a powerslam for two. Off to a sleeper which doesn’t last long.

Roode hooks a bad figure four (doesn’t even deserve to be capitalized) and Jarrett doesn’t really sell it for awhile. Roode tries it again with a Jarrett mimic in there but Jeff rolls him up for two. A double clothesline puts both guys down. Traci jumps up and down and I lose my train of thought. Jarrett wins a brief slugout and takes over with a low blow which isn’t a DQ for no apparent reason. Roode gets slammed off the top and now Jarrett hooks the Figure Four in what I guess you can call a Flair Double Shot.

Traci grabs the referee (lucky) while Roode taps. Jarrett is a good guy in this match so he lets go of the hold because he’s an idiot. Roode rips a buckle pad off but both guys block shots into the steel. Now Roode is going for the knee for some reason. Oh yeah that alleged figure four earlier. He wraps Jarrett’s leg around the post and brings in a chair. The referee tries to grab it which the referee releases to send it into Roode’s head in a HORRIBLE looking shot. Stroke gets two as Brooks saves, only to get her sent to the back.

The referee takes her to the back for some reason, allowing Roode to hit a handcuff shot to the head for a very delayed two. Roode brings in a guitar but the referee steals it. Stroke is attempted but Roode counters into a fisherman’s suplex attempt which is countered into a Figure Four attempt which is countered into a kick into the steel exposed earlier. That’s enough for the Payoff (fisherman’s) to end it.

Rating: B+. This show is DRILLING it tonight as we get our second awesome match of the night. The ending was full of some awesome back and forth counters and the ending actually played off something earlier in the match. That’s all you can ask for at times and we got a great match out of it. Good stuff again.

Roode sets for a guitar shot but gets caught in the Figure Four again. Traci bounces out to hit Jarrett with the guitar but Young comes in for the save, putting Traci in a Figure Four of his own.

Christian is having a victory party despite not wrestling for about two hours. He still has the NWA Title here. He says all of Team Cage is going to win tonight. Tomko isn’t here yet and Steiner, his partner later, isn’t happy. AJ says he’ll take care of Joe later.

Christopher Daniels vs. Rhyno

There’s no backstory here that I know of. Daniels was channeling Sting or something, complete with mask, and Rhyno is the next victim I believe. All Rhyno to start as he runs over Daniels with power move after power move. Daniels gets up top but jumps into a belly to belly but he avoids the Gore. The fans aren’t sure who they like best here. Daniels misses a baseball slide but Rhyno misses a pescado. Not often you see a horned man fly. Then again it’s not often that you see a horned man.

Daniels sends him into the post to take over even more as we enter the heel dominance portion of our selection this evening. It appears to be the shoulder that’s hurt, so Daniels sends it into the barricade. Daniels works on the arm a lot, which is so evil and satanic of him isn’t it? Rhyno grabs a backbreaker to finally get some relief for his shoulder. Powerslam gets two.

STO gets two for Daniels. Spinebuster gets the same for Rhyno. This isn’t quite as good as the rest of the matches on the show tonight if you couldn’t tell. Daniels grabs a Koji Clutch which is shifted into the smarter cross armbreaker. Rhyno manages to get to a rope before he started thinking of Del Rio and fell asleep. BME misses and Rhyno hits something like a TKO for two. Daniels hammers away on him but Rhyno snaps off a Gore, which the announcers call a shoulder for no apparent reason. It gets two due to a boot on the ropes. Daniels goes to the floor where he picks up a ball bat and whacks Rhyno with it for the pin.

Rating: C. Yeah not as good as the other stuff but still, pretty decent stuff here that could have been a solid TV match which is ok on a PPV I think. The arm work made sense because that was his Gore arm, but I’d have liked the ball bat shot to have been to the arm instead of the head, which looked ridiculous and sounded even worse. Still though, this was fine.

Just to further the eye rolling aspect of the ending, Rhyno is up about 100 seconds after being hit over the head with a baseball bat by a professional athlete. He says he’s going to take Daniels out and goes after him. After a brief chat with the announcers we see Daniels coming back down the ramp with blood covering his face. Rhyno follows a few seconds later with a chair and my goodness he must have hit him hard. There couldn’t be any other possibility like a razor blade or makeup right?

Rhyno sets for a Rhyno Driver onto two chairs but security finally comes in to break it up. Shame too because it would have been awesome looking. West wanted to see the Driver.

We recap VKM vs. Basham/Danaja. VKM wanted Christy Hemme to sleep with them to get ahead and she said no, which set off a fairly long feud, resulting in her bringing in a bunch of teams to face them. It would wind up being the Rock N Rave Infection but until them we’re stuck with the Bashams.

Kip says he’s on his own tonight and that’s cool.

Kip James vs. Basham/Damaja

Damaja starts and Kip fires away quickly, as is common in handicap matches. Fameasser misses and it’s off to Basham. The heels (I think) take over and beat Kip down as Basham hooks a cravate. Kip fights back but walks into a chokebomb (Brain Damage) and a top rope headbutt from Basham ends this.

Rating: D. I guess every show has to have one bad match. This was pretty much nothing as Road Dogg couldn’t be there. To be fair though, it’s not like the match they had the next month was any better at all. This was just a bad match and the walking definition of a popcorn break match. The best match on the show (allegedly) is up next though so I’m cool with that.

Kip gets beaten down again post match until Lance Hoyt finally gets there to make the save.

We recap Storm vs. Harris, which is due to Storm turning heel on Harris and breaking a beer bottle over his eye. The result is a Texas Death Match between a guy from Tennessee and a guy from Kentucky being held in Florida.

Harris says Storm only had to say he wanted to end the team but instead he tried to end Harris’ career with a beer bottle. This has been about revenge and payback. It’s been about revenge before but now it’s about payback.

Chris Harris vs. James Storm

This is a Texas Death Match, which is last man standing but you have to get a pin or submission before the ten count begins. Both guys are in street clothes. In a cool visual, Harris rips up an AMW shirt on his way to the ring. This feels like it’s going to be awesome which is a very good sign. They slug it out in the aisle and Harris has the trademark handcuffs.

They go into the crowd almost immediately and Storm is running away. They’re in the back row of the arena and Storm is almost thrown over the wall in the back. I wonder what’s back there. Maybe it’s where they keep Shark Boy? All Harris so far as they head to the ring. Storm throws a drink in Harris’ face to shift momentum but Storm gets thrown into a wall to changes things right back again.

Harris is in the ring alone and has a beer and a chair. Storm is still over the railing so Harris hits a HUGE dive over the railing to kill Storm dead and gets a pin. Storm is up at 8 though. Harris goes up again but Storm knocks him off and gets his leg tied up in the ropes so that he’s in a Tree of Woe but hanging outside the ropes. Storm cracks him with a chair to the head and Harris is busted.

It’s Table Time as Harris is placed on the top rope. He avoids a hurricanrana and counters a sunset flip (???) into a Sharpshooter of all things. Well it takes out the legs so that makes sense. He can’t get it on so he kicks Storm in the balls. He catapults Storm face first into the bottom of the table, cutting him open on the metal part. FREAKING OW MAN!!! Harris can’t suplex him through the table so Storm kicks him low to balance things out.

Storm hits the Eye of the Storm to put Harris through the table. That looked awesome and it gets an academic pin but only gets nine. Here’s another table brought in by the Cowboy. He falls down trying to get it in though, probably due to blood loss. The table is on the outside but Storm can’t hit another Eye over the top. Harris goes to the apron and gets caught in an Elevated DDT for no cover.

Storm brings in various basic hardcore weapons but as he’s getting in himself, Harris spears him through the ropes to put him through the table. Not exactly Foley vs. Edge but not bad. Back in, Harris picks up a chair and Storm superkicks it into his face for two. Storm is STUNNED. You can’t see Storm’s face. It’s literally a crimson mask. They trade HARD trashcan lid shots and Harris hits the Catatonic (spinning Rock Bottom) onto a trashcan for two.

Now the match gets taken down a peg because Jackie Freaking Moore has to get involved. WHY DOES SHE ALWAYS HAVE A JOB??? She isn’t attractive, she’s nothing special in the ring, she’s always getting in the way, and NO ONE FREAKING CARES ABOUT HER. And if you say you do, you’re lying. Gail Kim comes out and cuffs her so she can drag her out of here. Both guys have beer bottles and Harris gets a shot to the head of Storm for the pin and the ten count. Perfect way to end it.

Rating: A. GREAT brawl and war here which is exactly what they needed to do. Tenay and West freak out and say how great it is and for once this year, they’re right. This was a blood war and Storm’s face is absolutely scary given how much blood there was on it. Great match and absolutely worth seeing based on the level of violence here.

Sting yells at Daniels about how he doesn’t have this right. Daniels says he has it absolutely right and leaves. Sting yells about Angle and says he’ll win the title tonight.

We get a highlight package of the Death Match.

Jerry Lynn vs. Alex Shelly vs. Senshi vs. Tiger Mask IV

He’s just called Tiger Mask here so we’ll go with that. Two in the ring at a time and we start with Senshi vs. Lynn. It’s one fall to a finish also. Lynn tries a crucifix but Senshi rolls down the back and misses a foot stomp. Lynn hooks an inverted spinning Gory Special and then they hit the mat. Jerry grabs an armbar but Senshi gets into a cross armbreaker on the ropes.

Shelly tags himself in and works on Lynn’s arm to a big reaction. Lynn speeds things up again and takes over on Shelley’s arm. Here’s Tiger Mask and Shelly bails almost immediately. Senshi gets him instead and Tiger Mask takes over. Everybody keeps tagging themselves in so there’s almost no way to keep track of who is legal and what is going on. A standing moonsault gets two for Mask on Shelley.

Everything breaks down and I’m really not even going to try to keep track of it. Lynn’s cradle piledriver is broken up as is the Tiger suplex to Senshi. Lynn hits a sunset flip to something like a Tower of Doom minus the Tower aspect and most of the Doom aspect. Still though, it looked cool and got two. A TKO gets two on Mask and Shelly puts Lynn on the top rope. Senshi dives onto the corner and tries….something that looks like a brainbuster off the top Shelly makes a save. Shelly tries a top rope rana but gets countered into a sunset flip by Lynn for the three count.

Rating: C. It’s fun and flashy but it’s nothing I’m going to want to see again. This is far from what the first one earlier in the night was but they were trying. Also this is a great match to throw out there to give the fans a breather after the big bloodbath we saw with the AMW explosion. It’s not bad but it’s really not my style.

The Guns beat down Lynn post match until Backlund makes the save.

We recap the tag title match. Team 3D beat LAX for the belts and giving them more or less every tag title ever and their 20th title overall.

Tomko says he can’t go over strategy with Steiner because Steiner is nuts and Steiner has right to call him out because he has stuff to do.

Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. Scott Steiner/Tomko vs. LAX

So Tomko and Steiner don’t get along and are here….because I guess, and LAX are the guys Team 3D beat to get the titles. After almost a minute of arguing we get Homicide vs. Steiner to start us off. Power vs. speed obviously and Homicide can only run so long before he gets caught. Ray tags himself in and sneaks up on Steiner for a pretty awesome German release.

Homicide comes back in and hits half a dropkick to both Immortal members. He and Steiner team up to beat on Ray which is about as odd of a pairing as you’ll find this side of Alex Shelly and Abyss. Ray kicks Homicide’s head off and it’s off to D-Von vs. Tomko. D-Von powerslams him down and SuperMex comes in via the slingshot shoulder. A Thesz Press by D-Von gets the fans behind the champions.

And never mind as LAX double teams him right back down to take over again. Steiner comes in and drops the elbow and the push-ups. Ray breaks up the cover and does push-ups of his own in a funny bit. He and Homicide get into it as D-Von keeps getting beaten down, in this case by Hernandez. Henandez does that always cool backflip to the top rope and seemingly botches a top rope splash to D-Von for two. His leg kind of landed on D-Von’s head which has to freaking hurt.

In a smart move, Tomko breaks up the pin and pulls Hernandez, not D-Von, back to his corner so that Tomko can tag himself in and get a piece of the weakened D-Von. Man, when did Tomko get so smart? It doesn’t really work though as D-Von hits a tornado DDT to break the momentum. I see why Tomko rarely used logic. LAX comes in to stop the tag but D-Von rolls under then and tags Bubba in a nice move.

Ray throws Hernandez out and brings Homicide in. Go after the smaller guys I guess. That’s very bullyish of him. Everything breaks down as is customary in these matches. Steiner suplexes D-Von so Hernandez destroys Steiner with a backbreaker. Ray cleans house and What’s Up Homicide? The fans want tables but Hernandez dives over the top to take out D-Von. Steiner and Tomko beat up Homicide but Homicide rolls through a Doomsday Device for two. Tomko and Steiner get into it but beat up Bubba a bit. Double teaming fails though and a 3D from 3D beats Tomko.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic triple threat here but it worked well enough. The Dudleys needed a win to establish themselves (for some reason) so this did that well enough. The Steiner/Tomko issue will be made clear in a bit. Tomko I think would go on to team with AJ and hold the tag titles for about six months after this so he did well enough. Also they would be the TNA Tag Titles here before to long.

Tomko attacks Steiner post match until Rick Steiner comes out for the save. They would team together for like three PPVs in a row against the Dudleys.

Angle is in Sting’s freaky area. He says Sting goes to Wal-Mart before all of his matches to buy facepaint so he can look like Ronald McDonald. What kind of creepy McDonald’s does Angle frequent? Angle says kill the effects, because once you do that, it’s just like Sting: nothing special. He’s a wrestler but Sting is nothing but a cartoon character. When Kurt Angle is calling you a cartoon character, you must be pretty messed up.

We recap AJ vs. Joe. This is another byproduct of Angle vs. Cage, as if they needed a reason to run this match.

AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

They’re treating this like a brand new match for some reason. I mean they’re not saying they’ve never met before, but they’re acting like this is an unheard of pairing. They exchange early control and Joe hits an enziguri in the corner to rattle Styles. Both guys try to speed things up but AJ misses a charge and goes to the floor where Joe hits the suicide elbow to send AJ into the crowd.

AJ gets knocked into the barricade and complains of a bad arm/elbow. Since AJ is a heel here he’s playing possum and pokes Joe in the eye. Why did they think this guy needed Flair again? Out to the floor again and Joe tries the Ole Kick but AJ gets out of the way. Back inside and AJ hits his drop down into the dropkick spot. That always looks so smooth, probably due to his using it in every match.

Joe grabs an atomic drop but a boot misses and AJ spin kicks him down for two. A release German buys some time for the fat Samoan. They slug it out and speed it up but Joe hits an overhead belly to belly and senton backsplash for two. AJ pulls the front of Joe’s trunks down to ram him into the corner and OH MY GOODNESS MY EYES!!!! I….I think I saw thong. What did I do to AJ to deserve that? I rate his matches well enough!

Springboard forearm looks to give AJ the advantage but the backflip into the reverse DDT fails also. The second attempt works better but it’s only good for two. He can’t hit the Clash and walks into a Death Valley Driver for two. Joe gets sent to the floor and may have messed the knee up. Back inside Joe kicks him in the face but can’t charge at Styles in the corner. AJ loads up the Spiral Tap but Joe was playing some serious possum, which AJ had been doing lately. Styles looks terrified so Joe locks in the Clutch and suplexes him over with it for the pin.

Rating: B-. Definitely one of their weaker matches but still very decent stuff. AJ just doesn’t work as a heel. It’s like trying to fight the Easter Bunny: you can try all you want, but it’s not there at the end of the day. This was very back and forth but was more like Joe getting revenge than being in any danger, which isn’t really all that great. Still though, Joe vs. AJ is always worth taking a look at.

We recap the world title match. This really spun off from Team Cage vs. Team Angle at Lockdown where Christian is kind of ducking Angle but he’s finally getting a shot tonight. Sting is here because….well because he’s Sting and he’s always in the title picture. I think he had lost it to Abyss and Christian won it from him so this is officially Sting’s rematch. Oh ok Jarrett got the fall in Lethal Lockdown and gave the title shot he won to Sting. Christian is playing them against each other.

NWA World Title; Sting vs. Christian Cage vs. Kurt Angle

Christian comes in as champion as we’ve already covered. Angle has only been here for awhile so he hasn’t been champion yet, making this a potentially huge night. The fans aren’t sure who they like but Sting seems to be solidly in third place. Christian is sent to the floor for the big showdown. I think the Canadian is the only heel in this. Angle takes over on Sting but goes to the floor. Sting beats on Christian outside and the fans seem more behind Christian than anyone else.

Angle vs. Christian in the ring now. Kurt is sent shoulder first into the post and it’s back to Sting vs. the Canadian. Sting actually hits the big elbow drop after a gorilla press. I don’t think I ever remember seeing that. A Vader Bomb of all things gets two. Angle pops back up and pulls Sting to the floor for an Angle Slam (called a suplex by Tenay) on the ramp. So now it’s Christian vs. Angle as the revolving door style of this match continues.

Sting starts getting back up so Christian hammers him right back down. That’s not very nice and I think he should send him a polite handwritten note of apology. Christian slaps Angle resulting in the American hitting a bunch of Germans on the Canadian. He’s at eight so far. Somehow that only gets two for Angle. As if that wasn’t enough for the champion, Sting puts Christian on the top and Angle runs up for a German to make a Tower of Doom, sending Christian flying.

Angle Slam and Unprettier are both countered so Christian goes up. Sting throws Angle into the ropes to crotch the champ. Christian falls forward and Angle is put in front of him for a Stinger Splash. The Death Drop gets two on Angle as Christian pulls the referee out. Scorpion is countered into the ankle lock but Christian saves.

Scratch the saving part as they’re both put in an ankle lock at the same time. They counter out and Sting hits a Rock Bottom on Christian (that’s a new one) but there’s no referee. Another referee comes out and Sting rolls Christian up. Angle grabs Sting’s ankle though and it’s a pin/tap at the same time.

Rating: B-. Good main event but it ran less than eleven minutes which really hurts it. The ending of course got thrown out for a Dusty Finish because Angle winning the world title had to be done twice right? It set up the King of the Mountain match next month which was better than this but not by much. This desperately needed about five more minutes and it would have been far better.

Overall Rating: A-. I REALLY liked this show and it’s easily one of the best that TNA has ever done. There’s a great match in the Death Match and the only really bad match is the handicap which is understandable. Good stuff although a longer main event and the show not ending in a Dusty Finish would have raised it up even higher. I liked it a lot and it’s probably the top TNA show I can think of. Great show.

 

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