Monday Nitro #199
Date: August 2, 1999
Location: Sioux Falls Arena, Sioux Falls, South Dakota
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Scott Hudson

I’m really starting to feel sorry for the wrestlers in this company. They have to work hard and try to carry this show to something resembling wrestling while the old guard just won’t shut up and get out of the way. There’s room for the older generation in a company because the young guys have no credibility without wins over established names, but there comes a point where it’s time to pass the torch. Unfortunately that was well over a year ago. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event stuff in case you’re having a hard time staying awake this week.

Recap of Hogan vs. Nash with Goldberg basically as a plot device.

We see Harlem Heat reuniting on Thunder.

Harlem Heat vs. Kanyon/Bam Bam Bigelow

Non-title with Page not in wrestling gear. Before the match he makes more your mama jokes about Benoit. He goes one step further though by saying David Flair is a better US Champion than Benoit could ever be. Oh you know it’s on now. Well at least Harlem Heat’s music is on, minus the pyro. Also in an amusing bit: Booker told Stevie to take off the black and white to reform the team. Naturally tonight, they’re in black and white.

Page leaves so Booker and Kanyon can have a Raise the Roof contest. Booker cranks on the arm and nails a dropkick before it’s off to his brother. Kanyon is mediocrekicked outside and Bigelow comes in for a power brawl. It’s Bigelow hammering him down until Stevie actually blocks a suplex and takes Bigelow over with one of his own. Booker and Kanyon come back in to try and make this a bit more interesting. Seriously if you have those two in a match, why would you ever let it be Stevie vs. Bigelow?

Anyway, Bigelow offers a distraction so Kanyon can poke Booker in the eye. Another suplex puts Booker down and Bigelow adds the top rope headbutt for two. It’s not quite Benoit, but then again maybe Bigelow’s mama was worse than Chris’. Booker fights up again and hammers away before nailing the flying forearm.

The hot tag brings in Stevie for big boots all around as the fans just not care. Everything breaks down and Stevie breaks up Greetings From Asbury Park. Not a Springsteen fan I guess. The Harlem Sidekick sends Kanyon to the floor and Booker goes up top, only to have Page come out and get on the apron. This brings out Benoit for a save, allowing Booker to dropkick Kanyon for the pin.

Rating: C+. This one is a mixed bag for me as the match was a nice change of pace from the stuff I’ve been sitting through lately, but at the same time I’m really not liking the idea that Booker T. is back in the same tag team he was stuck in for about four years. Harlem Heat used to be great, but I really don’t want to see the team again in late 1999.

Booker is the guy that should be the US Champion, but instead we’re sitting through an angle designed to make Ric look corrupt, even though he doesn’t have the power anymore. Is there a reason why Sting hasn’t done something about that yet? Does WCW even know that Sting has been in charge for like two weeks now? If they do, why hasn’t he like, done something yet?

Benoit wants a match later with Page.

Lenny and Lodi ask Ernest where he shops. Because they’re gay you see and gay men like to shop. HAVE THEY MADE IT CLEAR TO YOU THAT THEY’RE GAY YET??? I DON’T KNOW IF THEY’VE BEATEN IT OVER YOUR HEAD ENOUGH YET SO I THOUGHT I MIGHT SHOUT TO GET IT INTO YOUR HEAD SOME MORE! Did I mention this story is getting on my nerves?

Opening sequence.

Chad Brock will be performing next week. I don’t know who he is either.

Here’s President Sting with something to say. He wants Sid and Steiner out here tonight but needs a partner. The fans chant for Goldberg and Sting seems to think that’s quite a jolly idea. He’ll be back here at 9pm to get Goldberg’s answer.

Sonny and the Cat (sounds like a 1970s Saturday morning cartoon show) come out to rip on Buff’s bunny slippers deal last week. Tonight he’s going to whip someone without his red slippers, so he wants Lenny and Lodi out here right now. If they show up, he’ll tell them where he shops. Apparently this is a match.

The Cat vs. Lenny Lane/Lodi

They’re now wearing glitter and sucking on lollipops. Miller rams their heads together to start and throws Lodi to the floor before beating on Lenny. Lane goes outside as well and we have a chase involving Onoo. Back in and a pair of Feliners drop the brothers so Miller can pin Lane.

Ok, time to pause for a second. Let’s take a look at this. We have two men who are apparently gay, even though I don’t think it’s actually been said yet. On top of that, they follow almost every gay stereotype in the book, ranging from bright clothing to glitter to shopping. Then apparently they’re stupid enough that Miller can beat them both up in less than two minutes because they’re weak fighters. Oh and they’re brothers because why not make an incest joke too.

What in the world is the point of this storyline? If there’s any reason behind it other than to make fun of gay people, I certainly can’t see it. I tend to think that a lot of official statements and complaints from groups due to something they find offensive are stupid and a case where they need to just grow thicker skin, but this deserved every single lawsuit, complaint and raking over the coals that WCW got.

Compare them to the version that came three years later: Billy and Chuck. Now I’m not saying Billy and Chuck were some great leap forward for gay rights, but they were done roughly 19,000% better than Lenny and Lodi. To begin with, they won the Smackdown Tag Team Titles twice. In other words, they actually WON something. Have Lenny and Lodi won a single match between the two of them since this story started?

On top of that, and most importantly of all, they weren’t treated as something horrible and worthless. Yeah they were played for comedy, but the comedy felt much more lighthearted with them. Lenny and Lodi are seemingly getting beaten up because they’re easy targets. Billy and Chuck came off as stupid, but harmless for the most part. This story though comes off as offensive, low brow and really, really hateful. I could have gone with this story until they were suddenly brothers, because that changed this from something amusing to WCW trying to shock people and get a rise out of them.

Here’s Gene, who suddenly loves Hogan again. Okerlund always was a fickle guy. Anyway here’s Hogan in the black and white and a necklace made of paperclips (seriously) but minus the beard. Apparently the chicks have been all over him since he shaved. Sounding like Hulk instead of Hollywood, he talks about bleeding last week and how the cameras had to pan away before kids got scared. Oh come on that cut was so lame that even the Maryland State Athletic Commission wouldn’t have stopped the match. Anyway, Nash is a woman and Hogan is SHOOTING. Nash can have his title shot tonight if he wants one.

Sting comes out to get Goldberg’s answer. We see Goldberg looking at a clock and heading towards the ring, only to run into Rick Steiner before he gets through the curtain. Steiner lures him into a room where Sid is waiting with a snow shovel. Goldberg gets blasted in the head a few times but Sting runs into the back.

This goes as well as you would think it would as Sid and Steiner beat Sting down as well before dragging him back to the ring. Sting fights back but eats a chokeslam, only to have Goldberg run out for the save. You would think a SNOW SHOVEL TO THE BACK from a 6’10 300+lb monster would have more effect than it did in Home Alone but whatever. Goldberg wants to fight and I think we have our main event. This was actually a really well done segment and set up the match quite well. Unfortunately the match is going to be a disaster but the build was good.

Evan Karagias vs. Disco Inferno

Karagias speeds things up to start with some hiptosses and dropkicks. You can tell there’s something here as the announcers actually stop prattling on about the main event to hype Evan. Of course as they do that, Disco comes back with his usual barrage of clotheslines and atomic drops, followed by a middle rope forearm to the face for two. A second attempt misses though and Evan comes back with some right hands and a powerslam. Evan grabs a nice snap suplex but Disco actually uses his experience to hold the ropes to avoid a dropkick. The Last Dance is enough for the pin.

Rating: C. Hokey smoke that was actually entertaining while it lasted. It’s so rare for a match like this to have some thought put into it. Yeah it’s a basic story with Evan being full of fire but Disco using his experience to catch him trying for one too many moves, but the fact that there’s something to a match this short says a lot. I’ve said it time and time again: when you cut out all the nonsense and over thinking of a match and just let guys tell a story, it’s going to be entertaining because most wrestlers on this level are talented enough to make a match work.

Torrie thinks David should only have to defend the title when he feels like it because he’s already beaten everyone. Ok then.

Video on David Flair’s US Title reign.

KISS is here in three weeks.

Nitro Girls.

Sid says…..something in a whisper that I couldn’t understand other than the word Goldberg.

Hugh Morrus/Jerry Flynn vs. Dean Malenko/Shane Douglas

The youth movement is officially dubbed the Revolution. Dean tries a Cloverleaf in the first ten seconds but Morrus makes a fast save. The Revolution quickly clears the ring and stands tall. Well not really but you get the idea. Back in and it’s Morrus gorilla pressing Shane, which I’m sure is Ric Flair’s fault somehow. Shane escapes and dropkicks Hugh down, but that’s enough wrestling for Shane so it’s back to Malenko for a rollup.

Apparently Dean isn’t cool with Shane showing up and jumping into this group with people who have put up with WCW’s nonsense so he tags him right back in. Hugh nails a clothesline but takes too long loading up No Laughing Matter, allowing Shane to slam him down. A double tag brings in Malenko to hammer away on Flynn, only to take another clothesline. Jimmy Hart gets involved by tripping Malenko to the mat before Flynn starts kicking.

We run through the gauntlet of all the standard face in peril spots from the sunset flip broken up by a tag, the referee not seeing the tag and the heels taking turns with really basic moves. Flynn misses his 495^th kick of the match and Dean dives over to make the tag. Douglas cleans house with right hands and a powerslam on Flynn for two. Everything breaks down and the Pittsburgh Plunge is enough to pin Jerry.

Rating: D+. Sweet they have a really simple name now and they even beat a nothing tag team! Clearly they’re ready to move to the top of the company and take over the industry. This push seems to be too little too late as we had to sit through Bagwell’s push just dying and the Triad going over the Revolution time after time, save for I think a three day title reign for Benoit and Saturn. At the end of the day, these guys could light the world on fire but it’s never going to matter because WCW is too busy booking musical acts for the show instead of paying attention to guys working hard to entertain the people.

Malenko takes the Hardcore Trophy from Hart and says he’s bringing this back to Fit Finlay where it belongs.

Speaking of the musical acts, KISS is still coming in three weeks.

Goldberg Megadeath video.

Nitro Girls.

In a bizarre segment, Rick Steiner comes out, throws Scott Hudson into the ring for a belly to belly, and is taken out by security as we take a break.

We come back with Bischoff joining commentary as Hudson is taken into an ambulance. Great, now we get another hour and a half of Bischoff babbling about doing the right thing, which makes me think of Stephanie McMahon’s stupid interviews where she just goes on and on about whatever her latest endeavor is and how important it is while no one else in the world has any idea or cares what the heck she’s talking about.

Sturn comes out for his match and Bischoff immediately starts talking about how Saturn and the Revolution will be taking the company into the next generation. I’m sure that’s why you booked Bagwell vs. Piper in a freaking boxing match a few weeks back and are giving us Hogan vs. Nash at Road Wild while the Revolution doesn’t actually have a match announced.

As if that wasn’t enough, Hennig comes out before the match and rips on Chad Brock for not being a real country singer. So the Revolution can’t get a feud but the freaking country singer can get one? Again, you can see why this company is about to die from here. Maybe Benoit and company should put out a record and get on the radio if they want a spot in the main event. Or they should stop having good matches and turn 40.

Anyway Hennig sends Duncum in to fight and Saturn plants him with a Death Valley Driver immediately. Saturn wants Hennig in there right now because he isn’t a real cowboy. Time for a replacement match.

Saturn vs. Curt Hennig

Saturn is all over him like over the hill wrestlers on an episode of Nitro and quickly knocks him into the corner for some right hands to the face. Possibly too drunk to feel pain, Hennig knocks him out of the corner and nails a quick neck snap. Curt hits his knee lift as Bischoff talks about Hennig in the WWF for no apparent reason. A low blow puts Saturn back down (just make them legal. I don’t remember the last week that went by without one of those happening.) but he rips Curt’s shirt off. Back up and Saturn nails a quick spinwheel kick and the Death Valley Driver but the Windhams run in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This was just story development as I’m assuming we’re setting up the Rednecks vs. the Revolution at Road Wild. That being said, it really wasn’t the best match in the world but again, that’s due to the lack of time. I kind of which they could have taken out Kendall Windham instead of Duncum because Bobby actually has some potential rather than just a famous last name, but this went five minutes and didn’t manage to bury any talent or put the first 20 rows to sleep so they’re improving.

The Rednecks try to tie Saturn up but the rest of the Revolution comes in for the save.

Video of Benoit getting screwed out of the US Title last week.

Chris Benoit vs. Diamond Dallas Page

All this over a your mama joke. They spit at each other to start until Page nails him in the ribs and grabs a quick belly to back suplex. Benoit will not be outsuplexed by anyone so he slaps on the Crossface, sending Page scurrying to the floor. Back in and Page nails a quick neckbreaker but the Diamond Cutter is stopped and Benoit grabs the snap suplex.

Remember a year and a half back when these two and Raven were tearing up the midcard over the US Title? Well now Benoit is still the same guy he was before and Page has just been going through the motions for months now, basically wasting all of his time built up as a top guy. Anyway Page elbows him in the face and hits that very nice helicopter bomb (that should be a finisher. It worked in No Mercy so it works in real life) for two.

Another low blow keeps Benoit in trouble and a spinebuster gets yet another two. Page goes up top for the sole purpose of getting crotched and superplexed to put both guys down again. Benoit rolls some Germans but, say it with me, Page hits him low to escape. A Rock Bottom gets two for Page but Benoit plants him with a DDT. The Swan Dive connects as David Flair comes out, only to get knocked off the apron. The distraction lets Page grab a rollup but Benoit reverses into one of his own for the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty good, hard hitting match here as Benoit gets a pin over a former World Champion. Like I said it’s a far cry from their great US Title match on Thunder the previous year, but it’s always good to see Benoit get something like this. It wasn’t even that overbooked with just the Flair interference near the end. Now if only Benoit gets to keep this momentum going.

And of course it lasts all of 8 seconds as Benoit eats a two Diamond Cutters plus one off the top as the Triad comes in. David taunts Benoit with the belt, apparently continuing their…..I’m not sure what to call it because a three minute beating with a screwy ending doesn’t sound like much of a feud.

Here’s Savage on his own to talk to Okerlund. He’s suspended his campaign for President (oh darn the luck) because he has to hurt Hulk Hogan, Kevin Nash and Dennis Rodman. He wants Rodman out here right now but gets the former Miss Madness instead. Mona begs to be back on his team again so Savage shoves her down to her knees. Savage looks at her and says she’s still fired.

Cue Rodman with the No Limit Soldiers and oh dear goodness why are they mixing these stories? Rodman says George is his now, presumably because once you’ve gone black you never go back. Rodman: “Once you go black, you never go back.” Mona hits Savage low and Rodman comes in for the same offense he had back in 1997 and the fans love it as we go to a break.

Why are these two feuding? That’s a serious question. One night Savage just started talking trash about Rodman and now we’re watching this mess every week. As has been my issue for months, why isn’t this ANY ACTIVE WCW WRESTLER fighting Savage and getting this rub by association? It worked wonders for Page last year but now it’s all about Dennis Rodman for the short term celebrity moment. If nothing else, have some young guy fight with Rodman. Also, who am I supposed to cheer for here? The kidnapper or the woman beater?

Vampiro vs. Eddie Guerrero

Vampiro has Raven and the Clowns with him. It’s amusing hearing Heenan talk about the Insane Clown Posse when he clearly has no idea who they are and would love to rip on them if not for Bischoff sitting next to him. Eddie stomps him into the corner to start as Bischoff tries to apologize for the comments made in the previous segment. I’d prefer he just apologize for the previous segment but I’d rather not hear him talk about doing the right thing again.

A clothesline turns Vampiro inside out but Raven trips Eddie up to take over. Eddie is sent outside and knocks a cameraman over as the Clowns get in some cheap shots. They whip him into the steps before Vampiro and Eddie trade chops back inside. Vampiro gets armdragged off the top and dropkicked over the top, only Shaggy. Eddie hits a great looking dive to put them down again but Raven shoves him off the top, setting up the Nail in the Coffin for the pin.

Rating: C-. Good grief stop with the celebrities! We have Brock, Rodman and the Clowns all on the show plus KISS coming in to perform in a few weeks and getting two separate videos so far tonight. They have such a huge roster but insist on bringing in those people to keep taking spots and going further and further into the hole against Raw. But hey, Bischoff is saying how great the Revolution is so that has to mean something right?

The Clowns beat Eddie down post match but Mysterio comes out for the save.

Berlyn is coming. I actually liked that character.

Hogan comes out for commentary with Bischoff. Oh this is going to hurt.

Sid/Rick Steiner vs. Goldberg/Sting

Hogan’s first gem is about wanting to pass the torch to Sting. There’s a LONG rant about Starrcade 1997 in there but I want to get this over with. It’s a big brawl on the floor to start until Sting suplexes Sid over the top and back into the ring. That lasts all of four seconds before they head back outside and switch things up. I guess these old guys can’t handle having a match at this point. Steiner sends Sting into the buckles back inside before tagging Sid in as the match actually gets going.

Sting takes his second chokeslam of the night but Goldberg makes a fast save. That’s enough for Sting to start a comeback but a splash on the mat hits knees. Sid’s legdrop hits the mat though and Sting loads up the Scorpion, only to have Steiner break it up. Everything breaks down again with Goldberg being sent to the apron. Naturally it’s time to cheat but Hogan takes a chair from Rick and blasts him in the head with it, drawing a DQ.

Rating: D. Standard angle disguised as a wrestling match here with Goldberg never actually tagging in. It’s a shame that the main event is being hogged by these guys but that’s a broken record at this point. This is clearly setting up a big six man followed by three singles matches at the PPV. In other words, Goldberg went from World Champion to gone for months to the TV Title against Rick Steiner while Hogan and Nash have the main event title program because Nash felt like turning heel. This really shouldn’t surprise you.

Cue Nash to powerbomb Hogan through the announcers’ table to end the show. It’s a good thing there were no monitors on the table and that it was clearly gimmicked.

Overall Rating: C-. I hate to admit it but they’re getting a little better. Maybe I’m just numb to how bad WCW is at this point but I didn’t hate this episode. I hated things about it but the wrestling was mostly fine and the stories actually advanced. Granted the stories are mostly about the celebrities and old people but they are indeed advancing. At this point it’s more that you have to just accept what you’re given with WCW because the chances of them getting it right get weaker and weaker every week.

The Revolution stuff continues to frustrate me every week. You can see them chomping at the bit to take over, but they’re clearly running on a treadmill, perpetually stuck being the guys waiting to take over instead of ever actually taking over. Those spots are saved for the guys that were draws before and will be draws in the future because once you’re a draw, you’re ALWAYS a draw, but apparently you can’t become a draw for some reason. Even Goldberg, who was the hottest guy in the world not named Austin last year, is looking more like a catalyst to get to the real main event of Hogan vs. Nash. Better but still weak show here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

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Thunder
Date: July 29, 1999
Location: Mark of the Quad, Moline, Illinois
Attendance: 6,754
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

It’s another taped show, meaning we’re getting a lot of recaps from Monday’s trip back to the mid 80s. We’re closing in on Road Wild in a few weeks which looks like a more logical (well, more than the rest of the summer) show, albeit far more boring. Maybe they’ll let the wrestling dominate the show and it could be entertaining. And maybe I’ll grow wings and fly through a tree made of locusts and encounter the Great Potato. Let’s get to it.

Tenay and Larry do their usual intro that we can’t see.

We get a LONG video (same one from Monday), detailing the history between Nash and Hogan.

KISS is coming to Nitro on August 23.

The Cat vs. Barry Darsow

Miller says he can win this in less than five minutes. Darsow takes him down by the leg to start like a smart guy should. Back up and Miller goes to the eyes to take over, only to get slammed right back down. Barry slugs him down as the crowd looks at something off camera. More hammering ensues until Miller finally gets in a shot to the throat and chokes in the corner. Onoo gets in a few kicks of his own but Barry grabs a belly to back suplex for two. The referee argues with Darsow over something though, allowing Cat to superkick him with the red slipper for the pin.

Rating: D-. So it’s heel vs. heel with Barry Darsow being the hope for the wrestling world? We’re definitely in the dark days of a taped Thunder here and I can’t imagine things are going to get much better as things go on. Miller needs to do something different in his matches though as this is getting really repetitive.

Goldberg Crush Em video.

We see Rodman kidnapping Gorgeous George on Nitro.

Diamond Dallas Page was on Hollywood Squares.

Buff Bagwell vs. Erik Watts

They pose at each other to start as this really isn’t waking up the crowd. Erik takes him into the corner and chokes a lot until Buff grabs an armdrag. A clothesline puts Watts on the floor before slapping him in the jaw back inside. Buff fires off right hands in the corner but gets dropped down into a hot shot. Riveting stuff here people. Erik hammers away with knees to the ribs and forearms to the back as you can hear the crowd just dying. A bad looking but still acceptable standing moonsault gets two on Buff and we hit the chinlock. Back from a break with the hold still on and Buff’s arm dropping twice.

Watts knees him in the ribs for two and we’re back to the chinlock. Bagwell’s comeback consists of a clothesline and cross body for two before Erik clotheslines him down again. He misses a charge in the corner though, only to hold onto the ropes to avoid a Bagwell charge. A Vader Bomb hits feet though and Buff starts his real comeback. After another barrage of clotheslines and punches, he nails the Blockbuster and gets the pin, despite Cat running down to try to break it up.

Rating: D-. Oh no they’re not trying tonight. This is clearly one of those shows where it’s just thrown together with the hopes that not many people are watching. Considering that we’re over half an hour into this show and everything new so far has been about a bad midcard feud, you can tell what kind of a show we’re in for.

Bagwell nails Sonny after bailing from Miller.

Here’s the whole (albeit short) Goldberg vs. Hennig match from Nitro.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

Chad Brock will perform on Nitro, August 9.

Booker T. vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Before the match, Page actually makes Yo Mama jokes about Booker. You think I can make this stuff up? Bigelow misses an early splash but Booker charges into a boot in the corner. The big man hammers away, only to miss the falling headbutt. Booker hammers away but Bigelow swats a kick away and suplexes him down.

Page and Bigelow take turns choking until Booker rolls outside so Page can whip him into the barricade. Back in and Bigelow keeps hammering away until he misses a charge, allowing Booker to side suplex him as we take a break. Back with Booker hitting two kicks, drawing in the Triad for the DQ. The post break stuff wasn’t even 45 seconds, meaning not enough was shown to rate it. It was basically a Bigelow squash until the break though.

Post match the Triad triple teams Booker until Stevie Ray comes out with a chair. After some trash talk, Booker says he wants his brother back but not with that NWO shirt on. Stevie throws it into the crowd and Harlem Heat is back. My goodness we actually had some storyline development on this show.

Here’s everything related to Hogan/Sting/Sid/Nash from Nitro, including the FULL main event. This eats up about half an hour, not counting commercials.

Road Wild ad.

Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn/Dean Malenko vs. Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon/Ric Flair

This is the main event people and we have about fifteen minutes left in the show. Flair and Benoit get things going but Page gets in a cheap shot. Everything breaks down for and the good guys clear the ring (of course). We settle down to Saturn vs. Kanyon with Saturn getting knocked down and cradled for two. He comes right back with a low blow and middle rope forearm (nice one too) before snapping off a German.

Here’s Benoit for a backdrop and two before he drop toeholds Kanyon down, allowing his partners to drop an elbow apiece. Dean comes in for his leg lariat as the young guys take over. Page breaks up a belly to back suplex though and it’s a double tag to Saturn and Flair. It’s Saturn taking over and hammering away in the corner until Kanyon gets in a cheap shot, setting up a Russian leg sweep off the middle rope for a nice spot to take us to a break. Back with Page Rock Bottoming Saturn before it’s off to Kanyon for a reverse powerbomb out of the corner.

Page comes back in with a front facelock, setting up the required missed tag thanks to a Flair distraction. Page knocks Benoit and Malenko off the apron before stomping on Saturn, only to miss a splash. The hot tag brings in Benoit to face Kanyon as the Canadian starts cleaning house. Flair and Kanyon are rammed together and the dragon suplex puts Kanyon down again. The Swan Dive connects on Kanyon and everything breaks down. Bigelow’s top rope headbutt hits Kanyon by mistake but Asya gives Flair an object to knock Benoit out, giving Kanyon’s unconscious body the pin.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but it came at the end of a worthless show. However, it’s yet another loss for the youth movement which is more or less done at this point. This worked well enough for the most part and was a decent enough main event, but I was done with this show a long time ago.

Shane Douglas comes out post match and says they’re taking WCW back. Maybe winning a match would help.

Overall Rating: D-. You could also go with a rating of “Nitro” because that’s what this show is about. Thunder has become a two hour version of WWF Metal or Jakked with mostly recaps and matches that don’t mean a thing. Harlem Heat reuniting will be covered on Nitro and didn’t need to be here, especially on a show this worthless. Over a third of the content on this show was spent on recaps from Nitro and another third was dedicated to Bagwell vs. Cat. Let that sink in for a minute.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/

Monday Nitro #198
Date: July 26, 1999
Location: Mid-South Coliseum, Memphis, Tennessee
Attendance: 7,201
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Bobby Heenan

We’re less than three weeks away from Road Wild and the top of the card is starting to come into focus. Nash took a very sharp heel turn last week, seemingly for no reason other than Hogan vs. Nash needed to be face vs. heel. On top of that, Thunder actually set some stuff up for tonight, such as Nash/a mystery partner vs. Hogan/whomever he can find, plus Hennig vs. Goldberg. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of last week’s major events, including Sting winning control back and Rodman attacking Savage.

Recap of Hennig challenging Goldberg from Thunder.

Video on Goldberg.

Gene brings out Hogan for an opening chat and brings up Nash’s challenge for the tag match tonight. Hogan doesn’t have a partner, but he does have the title. Cue Nash, Steiner and Sid to beat Hogan down until Sting makes the save.

Back from a break with a recap of what we just saw.

Psychosis/Juventud Guerrera vs.Kendall Windham/Bobby Duncum Jr.

Juvy wants to start and springboards in, only to dive into Bobby’s boot. The Rednecks take over to start with their slow Texas pummeling until Duncum charges into a boot to the face. A missile dropkick sends Bobby into the corner for the tag off to Kendall, who knocks Guerrera into the corner. Juvy doesn’t tag for some reason, allowing the Rednecks to beat him down even more. Bobby misses an elbow to the jaw and Juvy finally tags out.

It’s Psychosis in with some fast kicks to the face followed by a springboard missile dropkick from Guerrera. Kendall comes back with a hot shot and BIG lariat to take Psychosis down as the Rednecks regain control. Duncum gets two off a shoulder breaker, setting up a Windham belly to back superplex for two on Psychosis. An attempted tag to Juvy goes nowhere and a double bulldog is enough for the pin.

Rating: C. The ending here was kind of awkward but the luchadors put on a decent effort. This is the weaker half of the Rednecks and it’s getting a bit annoying to see the team out there getting cheered when we’re supposed to be booing them because WCW doesn’t understand its own fans. Nice little match though and that’s a step up for WCW.

Country singer Chad Brock will be performing live in two weeks.

Madusa and Miss Madness will be having a match at Road Wild but they can still insult Gorgeous George. Ignore the phone ringing during this segment.

Vampiro vs. Rey Mysteiro Jr.

Non-title because the Cruiserweight Title means nothing anymore. The Insane Clown Posse is in Vampiro’s corner because they think they’re wrestlers. Vampiro easily shoves Rey down to start and nails him with a clothesline. Rey finally gets up and dropkicks the knee out before a regular dropkick puts Vampiro on the floor. The Clowns have a quick meeting with Vampiro outside before he heads inside for a Rock Bottom to plant Mysterio again.

Rey ducks a spinwheel kick though and nails a Fameasser in the ropes. The Clowns offer a distraction though and the Nail in the Coffin knocks Rey silly. Vampiro goes up though, only to get crotched. We’re not done with the Clowns though, as Jay holds Vampiro’s legs to prevent a super hurricanrana, allowing Vampiro to powerbomb Rey off the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C. Again the match was fine and it’s nice to see someone new getting a bit of a push, even though it has to be thanks to the Clowns. That being said, this was a nice change of pace as the underdog good guy was fighting big odds and lost to cheating heels. That’s wrestling 101 and it’s going to work every time. Granted it helps that these wrestlers aren’t my grandparents’ age.

Eddie runs out to save Rey from a beatdown.

Vincent vs. Stevie Ray

Well you knew the good stuff wasn’t going to last forever. Vincent, with Horace in his corner, rips on Stevie for having a heart about his brother before jumping Ray on the way into the ring. Ray shrugs him off and nails a hard elbow to the face, setting up a Flair Flop. A powerslam puts Vincent down again but he comes back with a low blow, which is totally legal anymore in WCW. Horace tries to interfere but Ray whips Vincent into him to knock Sergeant Nepotism (David Flair would be the Captain of course). Ray loads up the Slap Jack as Booker comes out to cut off Adams. The Slap Jack (move) is enough to end Vincent.

Rating: D. If this is what it takes to finally end the NWO, I guess I can survive it. It’s still not a good match or anything, but at least they kept this under four minutes. Unfortunately it means we have to see Booker T. get dropped back into the tag team scene instead of moving up the card like he should be. Granted, that’s probably a good thing at this point.

Sting goes into Hogan’s dressing room.

Post match here’s President Sting to say that he’s made his first decision as boss: he’s going to be Hogan’s partner tonight. Hogan comes out and says he’s not Hollywood anymore and promises not to stab Sting in the back. Sting says that’s fine, but if Hogan does screw him, Sting will “getcha”.

Jason freaking Hervey joins the broadcast booth to make up for the bad taste Arliss left on him last week.

Prince Iaukea vs. Lash Leroux

Iaukea grabs a quick armdrag to take Lash down but slaps him in the face. Not that it matters as Savage and George come out to beat up both guys for the no contest less than a minute in.

Savage babbles about running for President until Madusa and the former Miss Madness come out to insult George. Madusa is on Savage’s side in this, but George is the real problem. In the distraction, Dennis Rodman sneaks in and kidnaps George.

KISS is coming.

Savage is looking for George.

Goldberg comes out, says he’s going to hurt Hennig, and that’s about it.

The Cat vs. Evan Karagias

Miller makes his usual offer as Hervey plugs some movie he’s in with DDP. Of course he doesn’t mention the name of the movie or when/where we can see it but he does mention it. Cat takes Evan down with a clothesline to start and we appear to be in squash mode, which makes me think there’s a swerve coming. Kicks abound, broken up by a dancing elbow from Miller.

A sunset flip doesn’t get Evan anywhere so Ernest dances and kicks him in the face. Evan comes back with a forearm and a nice springboard cross body. Cue Onoo for a distraction so Miller can get the shoes, but he finds bunny slippers instead of the ruby slippers. Bagwell pops up on stage with the red shoes, allowing Evan to get a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D+. Somehow this was tolerable as Miller is starting to get the hang of being a heel. He’s still nothing to see in the ring but at least he’s starting to find something other than just kicking all the time. This is a waste of Bagwell, but at least he might get a win out of the thing.

Mikey Whipwreck vs. Steven Regal

The announcers explain that Finlay has injured his leg in a hardcore match last night and may never wrestle again. During Regal’s entrance, a fan jumps the barricade but is quickly taken down by security. As you would expect, Regal takes it to the mat to start and easily rides Whipwreck. Back up and Mikey tries to quicken the pace with some armdrags and a headscissors, sending Regal over to the warm cuddling arms of Dave Taylor.

Regal gets back in and takes Whipwreck down again before cranking on the arm. That goes nowhere though because Hart’s First Family (about as over as anyone all night) comes out to say the Brits can get the Hardcore Trophy back at Road Wild. We get an Andy Kaufman reference, allowing Hervey to try to sound intelligent, making him all the ore annoying.

The distraction lets Whipwreck grab a quick rollup for two and a nice pinfall reversal sequence doesn’t get anyone anywhere. Regal drops a leg for two but gets rolled up for the same. Now it’s Mikey taking him into the corner for the top rope hurricanrana, only to have Taylor blast him with the Union Jack, setting up the Regal Stretch for the submission.

Rating: C. They’re actually bringing some decent wrestling tonight, perhaps due to letting talented people get a few minutes in there. The match wasn’t anything great, but it was nice to see some wrestling going on. You know, in between the various interference that this match just had to have. I’m still not quite sure why Mikey was hired, unless it was so that he couldn’t work for ECW.

Mike gets covered by the Union Jack.

Here are David Flair and Torrie for a chat. David does all his dad’s catchphrases (including saying to be IN the man) and has Torrie say he looks good. Short version of this is David will be champion as long as he wants.

Savage swears a lot and storms into Rodman’s trailer with the censor missing an F bomb.

Shane Douglas is here to help his friends and cut out the cancer called Ric Flair. I really don’t like it when you hear wrestling angles called cancer.

Goldberg vs. Curt Hennig

Hervey brags about having access to WCW clips and how great a job Goldberg does. Hudson: “I don’t think Goldberg does jobs at all!” I chuckled a bit. Anyway Goldberg throws Hennig around with ease and slams him out to the floor. The Rednecks offer a distraction so Hennig can nail Goldberg with a cowbell for no cover. Goldberg pops back up and powerslams Hennig down, drawing in the Rednecks to be quickly dispatched. Curt grabs a chair but backs down instead, giving Goldberg a DQ win due to the interference. They couldn’t have Hennig get pinned by GOLDBERG?

Goldberg spits on Hennig post match to draw him back in, only to knock Curt right back to the floor.

Video on Hogan vs. Nash, featuring a big backstory on the NWO. I’ll give them points for making it feel like a big deal, but making it face Hogan vs. heel Nash has really hurt my interest in the match.

Patty Stone Grinder vs. Madusa

Stone Grinder is former WWF Women’s Champion Lelani Kai as a biker. Hervey spends the entrances bragging about being a network actor, making him better than Arliss. Patty jumps Madusa as she gets in the ring and chokes her with a chain. Some bad looking knees have Madusa in trouble as Hudson runs down upcoming Nitro dates. Patty drops her with a butterfly suplex but Madusa comes back with a clothesline to knock Grinder to the floor for a big dive. Back in and the German suplex ends Patty to end the Wrestlemania X rematch.

Rating: D. You know, I had a big rant set up about how this is the best WCW can do to compete with the WWF’s women’s division, but then I realized that Fabulous Moolah was about three months away from winning the title again. However, that at least had some nostalgia and charm to it. This was Madusa beating up whatever relic WCW could find who could work a passable match. It’s really all the proof you need that they didn’t care about this division and just put it together for the sake of saying they had one. To be fair though, that’s basically what WWF did with the light heavyweight division around this time.

Shane Douglas vs. Scott Putski

Scott actually gets the first blows in with some clotheslines and a snap suplex for two. A backdrop has Shane in even more trouble but he finally grabs a neckbreaker to take over. We actually get a reference to Shane’s WCW tenure back in 1992. Shane piledrives Putski for two and we hit a chinlock. Way to show WCW that fire you’re bringing with you Douglas. Putski fights up like a jobber should and walks into the Pittsburgh Plunge (fisherman’s buster) for the pin.

Rating: D+. So to recap, Shane Doulgas is back from ECW to cut out the cancer known as Ric Flair for holding Shane down in ways he never has the time to explain and he starts by having issues beating Scott Putski. I’ve never been a Douglas fan and this is yet another reason of why I feel justified in that thinking.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. David Flair

Little Naitch is refereeing and Benoit is challenging of course. Benoit easily takes him down to start and rips David’s chest off with chops to send the champ to the floor. David tries to leave but Robinson tells him to keep going. Back in and more chops have David screaming, followed by a backbreaker and Liontamer. The champ taps but Robinson just lets him suffer. The Swan Dive sets up the Crossface, only to have DDP come in with a belt shot to give David the pin.

Rating: D. Do I need to explain this one? Again, I actually like the idea behind Flair as they’re openly acknowledging that he’s horrible and only there because his dad was the boss but…..wait why can they still get away with this cheating with Sting in charge now? Shouldn’t that have stopped immediately?

Malenko, Saturn, Douglas and the rest of the Triad run in for a big brawl.

TV Title: Chase Tatum vs. Rick Steiner

Tatum, a No Limit Soldier, comes out to heavy metal. Steiner just mauls him in the corner with right hands and knees to the back. A shoulder drops Rick for a few seconds but another suplex sets up the Steiner Bulldog to retain.

Hollywood Hogan/Sting vs. Kevin Nash/Sid

Of course it’s Sid, because that’s the least logical option outside of Randy Savage. Somehow that means this could be worse if you can actually believe that. Hogan doesn’t bring the belt with him for no apparent reason. Speaking of no apparent reason, there is no reason for either of these teams to trust each other given their recent and distant histories. Again, Sid tried to MURDER Nash a few months back and it’s just forgotten here. By the way, average age of the people in this match: 43, with Sid as the young pup of the group at 38.

Sid tries to take Hogan into the corner to start but Hollywood takes him in instead with a series of right hands. An atomic drop puts Hogan down but Sid is nice enough to help him up. Hogan and Sting get Sid caught between them for a barrage of right hands but Sid blocks a slam. It’s Sid slamming Hogan though, only to miss an elbow drop. Everything breaks down and the good guys clean house.

Back in and Nash slows things down but misses the framed elbow. Sting tries to jump over Nash in the corner but gets caught in Snake Eyes. It’s back to Sid who rakes the eyes to stop Sting’s comeback and we hit the chinlock. Sting fights back again but his splash hits knees and it’s back to Nash. Another comeback is quickly stopped though as Nash knocks Hogan to the floor, leaving no one for Sting to tag.

Nash sends him into the corner and Sting tries another jump, only to have Nash stay in the middle, leaving Sting to just crash into him. Now we get the hot tag to Hogan as everything breaks down again. The referee takes the Stinger Splash by mistake so here’s Rick Steiner to blast Sting with a chair. Hogan cuts his forehead, starts bleeding, and then gets hit in the head to bust him open, giving Nash the easy pin.

Rating: D. Were you expecting anything else here? This was your standard main event tag but the things like Sting just crashing into Nash or Hogan clearly blading in the middle of the ring and bleeding before anyone hit him in the head took away any fun this match could have had. Also, anytime Rick Steiner gets closer to the main event, the match loses more of its value.

Goldberg comes out for the save but gets beaten down as well to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show wasn’t horrible actually as the wrestling and story advancement carried it to a decent enough performance. Things have actually settled down over the last few weeks and a lot of the insanity has gone away. Unfortunately a lot of the ability to remember plot points from week to week has gone away as well, making a lot of the story developments mean absolutely nothing. At least the wrestling helped things out here though, which is better than what you get most of the time anymore.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: July 22, 1999
Location: Mark of the Quad, Moline, Illinois
Attendance: 6,754
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

Thankfully (I think?) we’re back to a live show this week as we’re getting closer to Road Wild. The main story coming out of Monday is Kevin Nash turning on Hogan for no apparent reason other than the script suggests that we need a heel vs. face title match. Other than that we have Sting in control of the company now, which I barely remember whatsoever. Let’s get to it.

The announcers do their usual intro/hype.

Van Hammer vs. Kaz Hayashi

The Glacier gear is gone. Kaz’s headlock goes as well as you would expect it to and Hammer hits a nice looking gorilla press. Now Kaz tries to slug it out to similar results so he finally dropkicks the knee twice in a row for one, but the kickout sends him flying through the ropes. Hammer runs him over with a Vader clothesline before throwing him right back to the floor. Back in again and Kaz goes after the knee to take the big man down. An elbow drop gets two but Hammer trips his legs to get a breather.

A big old beal sends Hayashi flying and we hit a chinlock. That goes nowhere so Hammer suplexes him down for two but Kaz comes back with every strike he can throw. Kaz actually tries a powerbomb which works as badly as you would expect. Hammer comes back with Snake Eyes and a big boot for two more as frustration is setting in. Back up and Kaz hits a quick bulldog and missile dropkick, only to miss a quick backsplash. A spinebuster and the cobra clutch slam are enough to end Kaz after longer than you would expect.

Rating: C. WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT??? Kaz and Hammer just had a good match that I was actually liking. Granted it’s completely in spite of whatever WCW was trying to do with it as no one is watching this show and it’s in the opening match slot. This was actually entertaining and I had a good time watching it. It had to happen at some point.

Lenny and Lodi are upset about something they have to do later.

The announcers talk about the issues between Savage’s girls.

Brandi Alexander vs. Miss Madness

Alexander is officially “off the independent scene”. Madness is wrestling in a short version of the dress she wears to the ring as a valet. The fans are entirely behind Madness here as she takes Brandi down by the arm. Some dropkicks send Alexander out to the floor and claims a pull of the tights. Back in and Brandi hammers away before throwing Madness across the ring by the hair in a good looking spot. It looks so good that she does it again with Tenay spending way too much time talking about Madness’ long blonde hair.

A hard shot to the face keeps Brandi in control before a clothesline gets two. The fans aren’t pleased with Brandi choking on the ropes but they don’t mind a Boston crab nearly as much. That goes nowhere so Brandi goes up, only to get slammed off the top. A side slam gets two for Madness and a bad looking headscissors sends Brandi down again. Larry: “You gotta get vicious! Pretend there’s a sale!” Madness grabs a suplex but bridges up like a northern lights for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t bad and was a few light years ahead of what the WWF was doing with its girls at the moment, but it still wasn’t all that great. Miss Madness would get much better as Molly Holly whereas Alexander hasn’t done anything that I can find outside of this and two more matches with Miss Madness later in the year.

A Goldberg video to Crush Em brings out Curt Hennit, who says the Rednecks are much more popular than Goldberg. He’s willing to prove that tonight but thinks we should wait until Monday.

Curt Hennig vs. Chase Tatum

The muscular Chase shoves Curt off to start and knocks him to the corner with a hard shoulder. The Rednecks offer a distraction and Hennig gets in a cheap shot from behind to take over. There’s the Hennig Necksnap and Curt rips at Chase’s eyes for good measure. Curt nails his knee lift and puts on a sleeper but Chase powers out of it again.

Hennig cranks on the leg on the mat as the other Rednecks offer some assistance. Back up and a kind of pumphandle powerslam gets two on Curt but he sends Chase to the floor for a big beatdown. Swoll comes in with the heart “punch” but hits Chase by mistake, setting up the HennigPlex for the pin.

Rating: D. It takes a lot to make Curt Hennig look bad but that’s exactly what Chase just did. Tatum wasn’t anything of note and a generic power guy who probably got this job based on his look. With some more training and experience, he might have fit in with the Natural Born Thrillers in a year or so.

Sid comes up to Lenny and Lodi and wishes the luck in their match tonight. The brothers ask Jimmy Hart for help but he just suggests having a doctor at ringside.

We get a clip of Booker T. saving his brother from the Triad on Monday.

Eddie Guerrero/Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Psychosis/Juventud Guerrera

Rey and Juvy get things going but Guerrera quickly tags out. Mysterio tries to deck him as he leaves so Juvy gyrates a lot on the apron. Juvy comes back in without Psychosis doing anything and they trade wristlocks. It’s quickly off to Psychosis again who misses a charge and hits the post to give the good people an early advantage. Eddie comes in and takes Juvy down to the floor before backdropping Rey into a moonsault for an awesome spot. Back in and Eddie throws Guerrera outside again, only to have to bail out of a dive.

We take a break and come back with Rey in Psychosis’ abdominal stretch. That boring hold is upgraded by Psychosis loading him up for an Outsider’s Edge and Juvy coming in with a guillotine legdrop for two. Back to Psychosis who charges into Rey’s boots, allowing Eddie to come in and clean house. Everything breaks down and Rey nails Eddie by mistake, only to have Eddie throw him at Juvy for a headscissors. They’re not done yet though as Rey puts Psychosis on top and throws a charging Rey up for a super hurricanrana and the pin.

Rating: C+. Total spotfest here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Guerrero was basically just a guy there to throw Rey around for the high spots though, which is kind of a waste as the team got together because of Eddie having issues with the other luchadors. Still though, entertaining stuff with some great high spots.

We see Lex Luger, Savage and Gorgeous George on Arliss this coming Sunday.

Here are Savage, Miss Madness and Gorgeous George with something to say. Savage asks for our votes in the 2000 election but quickly moves on to Rodman, ripping on him for wearing women’s closing and hitting him with a purse. Miss Madness is fired for trying to upstage him, meaning Savage rips off her sash. She gets down on her knees and begs for her job but Savage fires her anyway. Savage hasn’t forgotten about Nash either.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Sick Boy

Rick is defending if that’s not clear. Before the match we get the usual catchphrases from the champ and he wants a piece of Goldberg. They circle around each other for a bit until Rick nails a hard Steiner Line. A release German suplex sends Sick Boy flying and Rick rips at his face on the mat. The Steiner Bulldog ends this quick.

We recap the Nash vs. Hogan stuff from Monday.

Nash calls in to the show and challenges Hogan to a tag match this Monday with partners of their choice. Kevin’s partner is a buddy of his that he’s known for nine years. Of course they’re hinting at Hall and I’d be stunned if it was actually him. Nash brings up his history with Hogan and says he only let him into the NWO so he could keep an eye on Hulk, because Hulk has a history of being a backstabbing jerk.

Video of Sting beating Flair with Bischoff counting the fall.

Sid Vicious vs. Lenny/Lodi

A chokeslam plants Lodi in ten seconds and Lenny takes a boot to the face. Sid hits a cobra clutch slam on Lenny, which is another way for Sid to do a chokeslam. Powerbombs for both guys set up a double pin. So the gay brothers are getting beaten up by a monster for no apparent reason. I’m sure this will be well received.

Dean Malenko vs. Ric Flair

They start faster than you would expect with Dean getting dropped by a shoulder, only to have him take Flair down with a quick drop toehold. An early Cloverleaf attempt doesn’t work so Dean hammers Ric out to the floor for a breather. Back in and Dean hammers away in the corner but gets suckered into a thumb to the eye. Ric snapmares him down, only to miss the knee drop. Dean channels his inner Flair and slaps on the Figure Four, only to crawl over to the ropes for a break.

Back up and Dean is sent to the floor as we take a break. We come back with Malenko in full control and sending Ric into the corner for a Flair Flip. Dean works him over on the floor until Asya offers a distraction, allowing Ric to take over with a cheap shot. A Figure Four attempt is countered into a small package but Asya has the referee. Flair counters everything Dean throws at him, including a belly to back suplex to break up a headlock.

Another Figure Four attempt is blocked and Malenko comes back with the leg lariat. Flair tries to bail but runs into Benoit and Saturn. This brings out Bigelow and Kanyon for a brawl but Dean puts on the Cloverleaf. Page comes in from behind to break it up but gets shoved into Asya, only to have Flair grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was fine due to the talent level in there and I liked the idea they were going for with Flair being more experienced and polished than Malenko, allowing him to counter everything Dean threw at him. The ending was overbooked but at least Dean didn’t lose entirely clean.

Overall Rating: C. At this point, Thunder can only really be judged on what happens in the ring. In this case, the wrestling was watchable enough to get through two hours but there’s almost no reason to care about anything. Considering that the matches are almost never referenced on Nitro and nothing here mattered, it basically boils down to whether or not you liked the wrestling. It was decent enough this week so we’ll go right in the middle.

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Monday Nitro #197
Date: July 19, 1999
Location: Metrocentre, Rockford, Illinois
Attendance: 7,558
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Bobby Heenan

We’re inching closer to Road Wild and we have a main event of World Champion Hollywood Hogan defending against Kevin Nash, who may or may not be a heel now. The main story for tonight though is Sting facing Ric Flair for control of the company, which is a more interesting match as I really don’t remember where these stories go. Let’s get to it.

Quick recap from last week and the opening sequence.

Here’s Sid for an intellectual chat. He can feel the same thing the fans feel in his blood and wants Hogan’s World Title. We get the usual catchphrases and I’m assuming that’s our main event.

Nitro Girls.

Jerry Flynn vs. Fit Finlay

Before the match Jimmy Hart pops up on screen to challenge Finlay for Road Wild, giving him a chance to get the trophy back. Finlay takes over to start and hammers on Jerry in the middle of the ring. Then he hammers him against the ropes and in the corner for good measure. A snapmare and elbow get two on Jerry but he pops up with his spinwheel kick to get a breather. The fans actually cheer for Jerry as he nails a top rope clothesline for two, only to walk into a jawbreaker.

They head outside for some shots into the barricade but the referee takes Finlay’s chair away. We hit the chinlock back inside as Jimmy pops up on screen to cheer for Jerry again. Flynn comes back with his usual jobber offense and chokes against the ropes. He avoids a charging Finlay but walks into the rolling fireman’s carry. Not that it matters though as Finlay leaves to go after Hart, only to get jumped by the First Family, including Flynn. I’m assuming it’s a no contest.

Rating: D-. This is the match that’s supposed to get people to stick with the show? Seriously? This is the best they can come up with? When you have Road Dogg, Bob Holly and Al Snow doing actually entertaining hardcore stuff, at least try to counter with actual hardcore stuff instead of two guys having a bad match. It might actually work. Ok not likely but it could.

JJ Dillon is in the back with Lenny and Lodi. Their contracts have been renewed by something went wrong. Apparently they’re really brothers and should have signed as such. This story just reached a new level of creepy and stupid, which I didn’t think was possible.

Hogan comes out, says he’s going back to his old ways of listening to the fans and accepts Sid’s challenge. Somehow this took five minutes.

Video on Flair vs. Sting.

Norman Smiley vs. Lodi

Lenny and Lodi hug before we get going. Lodi rakes the eyes to take over early on, only to get armdragged down. The spinning slam sends Lodi running to the floor though and it’s time for another embrace. Smiley sends him into the barricade to keep Lodi in trouble though and it’s time for the BIG WIGGLE.

Lenny seems to like the idea and does it too, allowing Lodi to get in a cheap shot to take over. Lodi rolls some suplexes for two with Smiley getting a foot on the ropes. Norman fights up but runs into an elbow to the jaw. We pause for a bit for a consultation between the brothers, only to have Lodi run into a boot in the corner. The Norman’s Conquest goes on and Norman rolls Lodi up for the fast pin.

Rating: D. So we have brothers who…..you know what? I can’t get through this sentence without feeling very wrong. It’s a shock value story and isn’t making me care about either guy any more than I did before. I can’t picture it ending well either as it’s going to get into some uncomfortable areas.

The brothers try the Big Wiggle post match.

DJ Ran.

Eric Bischoff jumps in on commentary. Yay.

Video hyping Sting vs. Flair. Basically Sting says Flair is corrupt (he is) and now Sting wants a match for control of the company.

Sting vs. Ric Flair

Bischoff goes on another rant about what he did wrong. I really don’t know what they’re trying to accomplish with these talks but it comes off like trying to make me care about Bischoff, which would work better if he actually DID something. Sting plants Robinson with a Scorpion Death Drop before the bell, meaning Mickie Jay will come out to referee. Flair looks terrified as reality begins to set in.

The gorilla press plants Flair to start and the chops have no effect. You would think ten years would have taught Flair a lesson already. Sting sends him into the corner but Ric nails a quick low blow to take over. He tries a suplex from the apron to the floor and I’m assuming you know how that turns out. Ric rolls outside and pulls Sting with him, only to eat a hard clothesline.

Back in and Sting nails a big superplex for two as Anderson makes the save. Sting nails Arn but here’s Sid to attack Sting and give us a mini Horsemen reunion. Flair slowly stomps away on Sting and puts on the Figure Four. The ropes are grabbed and Sting gets back up to no sell some more chops. He charges into an elbow though, allowing Flair to go up top. After the required slam off the top, Sting nails some clotheslines but Ric pulls the referee in front of the Stinger Splash. Anderson and Asya come in but are quickly dispatched, allowing Sting to put on the Scorpion. Bischoff comes in and accepts Flair’s submission.

Rating: C+. This was just the greatest hits from Sting vs. Flair, which is fine given that they almost always have a good match. That being said, this felt more about Bischoff’s redemption, even though no one was really interested in seeing him be redeemed anyway. The fact that these two have had what is likely to be the match of the night tells you all about the match selection on this show.

Post match Sid comes in and nails Sting before powerbombing Bischoff. Hogan runs in for the save.

TV Title: Horace vs. Rick Steiner

Let’s get this over with. Steiner hammers away on Horace to start with his usual array of brutally bad offense. Horace pulls him out to the floor but misses a splash on the barricade ala Sting. Back in and Steiner slugs Horace down again with hard shots to the face before putting on a chinlock. Horace fights up with a big boot to knock the champ outside. The referee doesn’t seem to mind the chair shots to Steiner’s back. Kevin Nash seems to mind though as he comes out to send Horace into the steps. The Steiner Bulldog retains the title.

Rating: D. Someone lock Steiner in a room so he can’t hurt any more matches. This was the usual dreadful mess with Rick in there beating up whomever he’s against and barely selling a thing. Horace isn’t much but he’s light years ahead of Rick, who somehow used to be a good hand in the ring.

Nash and Steiner touch fists post match, drawing out Hogan to ask what’s going on. Kevin says it’s personal and that’s that.

Nitro Girls.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Psychosis

We continue the search for Eddie’s wallet. Psychosis misses a charge to start and crashes into the corner, allowing Eddie to baseball slide him out to the floor. Back in and Eddie nails a quick slingshot hilo, only to eat a clothesline from Psychosis. A headscissors and tilt-a-whirl backbreaker get two Eddie and we head outside again.

Eddie is sent into the barricade to work on the ribs so Psychosis throws him back in for a waistlock. A top rope spinwheel kick drops Eddie for two and a top rope hurricanrana gets the same. Eddie blocks a tornado DDT though and grabs a quick neckbreaker, followed by the Frog Splash for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Psychosis doesn’t get the respect he deserves as he’s actually better than people remember. He may not have been as good as the elite members of the division but he’s still more than able to hold his own in the ring. Eddie continues to look sharp since his return, but this wallet thing needs to wrap up soon so he can go somewhere else.

Villano V and La Parka run in to beat down Eddie post match until Rey Mysterio comes out for the save. Naturally former issues are forgotten and they shake hands.

In the back, Stevie Ray asks Vincent and Brian Adams to watch his back against the Triad. Adams isn’t interested because Ray should be worried about NWO business. He has a point there. Squashing Prince Iaukea on weekend C shows is serious business.

Kanyon vs. Stevie Ray

The Triad does their usual stuff but throws in some Your Mama jokes about Stevie. Ray storms the ring and destroys Kanyon with a big shoulder followed by a gorilla press and big boot. He’s wrestling like a total face so far. Kanyon ducks a corner clothesline though and hammers away, only to be thrown to the floor with ease. Stevie continues to defend his mama’s honor by sending Kanyon into the barricade and then the steps as this has been almost one sided.

Back in and Kanyon grabs a quick slam, followed by a middle rope legdrop for two. A swan dive misses though and Stevie plants Kanyon with a powerslam. The rest of the Triad comes in but Stevie fights them off with relative ease. Stevie totally botches the Slapjack, nearly falling onto Kanyon instead of jumping. Not that it matters as Page comes in for the DQ. Actually scratch that as the referee says it was a pin, even though Page hit him before the three. Ok then.

Rating: D+. Stevie looked like a monster out there but at the end of the day, there’s only so much he can do in the ring. That Slapjack was just horrible, especially when it doesn’t fit Stevie’s style. He’s a power guy but it’s really not a power move. If the skinny version of HHH can hit it, how powerful can it be?

The Triad beats Stevie down until Booker makes the save. To be fair they made fun of his mama too.

Robert Wuhl of Arli$$ joins commentary. I’ve never seen the show so I’m assuming he’s in character and doesn’t really sound this annoying.

Randy Savage vs. Kidman

There’s no Madusa with Savage for some reason. Before the match, Savage says he wants his title back and that he’s running for President in 2000. Sure why not. They trade wristlocks to start with Savage looking a bit frustrated. Savage kicks him in the ribs as Arliss is already getting on my nerves, talking about how amazing Dennis Rodman is. A headscissors and dropkick send Savage to the floor where he grabs a chair and blasts the announcers’ table.

Back in and Savage hammers away, only to get backdropped out to the floor for a big crash. That’s fine with Savage as he pulls Kidman out to the floor and chokes on the table……WITH A SLIM JIM! Ok that made up for a lot of the problems in this show. Back in again and Kidman eats an elbow to the jaw as Arliss STILL won’t shut up about Rodman. Miss Madness accidentally dropkicks Savage (at least it wasn’t the Molly Go Round) to give Kidman two. Savage pops up and piledrives Kidman into next year, setting up the big elbow.

He pulls up at two though and decks the referee, only to drop another referee. Cue Rodman in semi-drag to hit Savage in the back with his hat, sending Savage to the floor and Arliss into the ring to celebrate. I’m assuming the match was thrown out but the fans eat Rodman up because this is Chicago Bulls country.

Rating: C-. This summed up a lot of WCW’s issues in a nutshell. We had a watchable match going on, but between Arliss on commentary, Rodman coming in and the girls brawling afterwards, it was almost impossible to care about the match. On top of that, this was all to set up Randy Savage vs. Dennis Rodman? That’s the best idea they can come up with for a pay per view? Decent match ruined by WCW being unable to stop messing with things.

Security (and Tony Schiavone for some reason) comes in to break it up as Arliss makes a challenge for Savage vs. Rodman at Road Wild. Madusa comes out and brawls with Miss Madness

Clip of Vampiro beating up Konnan last week.

Konnan vs. Vampiro

Konnan babbles about cheddar before the match and slaps Vampiro in the face before the bell. Vampiro quickly takes over and suplexes him down for two before stomping away on Konnan. A spinwheel kick drops Konnan as Heenan sounds bombed. The kick to the ribs and X Factor set up a clothesline to knock Vampiro outside. Back in and a horrible looking takedown called a bulldog sets up the rolling lariat, only to have the Insane Clown Posse come in to stomp on Konnan for the DQ.

Shaggy 2 Dope drops a terrible looking “legdrop” on Konnan which seems to hurt him way more than it should. Raven is out with the clowns too. Rey tries to come in but gets laid out for a moonsault from Violent J. Let’s see: NWO, Team Savage, Rednecks, Triad, No Limit Solders, First Family, Vampiro and company and you could argue Regal/Finlay/Taylor. When you’re reaching enough factions to hold a factions tournament, it’s time to cut things down a few dozen notches.

Nitro Girls with DJ Ran.

Clip of Hogan winning the title last week.

Here’s Buff Bagwell dressed as the Cat to continue this stupid feud. I’ll gloss over the small guy with him in an Asian face mask and the fact that Buff has brown makeup on. His impression is good at least and he rips on fans for being fat. Buff promises to whip all of the Jacksons and wants to click his red shoes together three times to get out of Rockford. Eh point for a funny line. This brings out Cat and Onoo for a red shoe to the head and a Moonwalk elbow. So long Buff. It was nice having you in credability land while it lasted.

Road Wild ad.

Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn vs. Curt Hennig/Barry Windham

This could be good. Hennig takes Benoit into the corner to start but has his whip reversed so Benoit can hammer away. A dropkick to the knee puts Curt down and it’s off to Saturn for a double suplex. Back to Benoit very quickly for a double clothesline before the Crippler goes back to the knee. Kendall finally trips Benoit up to give Hennig a breather, allowing Curt to nail a clothesline and tag in Barry.

Windham hits a clothesline of his own and we take a break. Back with Barry superplexing Benoit for two as Saturn makes the save. Off to Curt for his usual, only to miss a charge in the corner. The hot tag brings in Saturn but he has to fight off all four Rednecks. Hennig rakes the eyes to get out of the Death Valley Driver but gets caught in the Crossface, drawing in the Rednecks for the DQ.

Rating: C. The match was ok while it lasted but I’m getting tired of these heel groups that keep interfering to end matches. We had it for years with the NWO and now we have it with the Triad and the Rednecks. I’m glad that they’re giving so many people something to do, but come up with something fresh. Also, did a six and a half minute match really need a commercial?

Malenko tries to make the save but gets beaten down as well. Instead SHANE DOUGLAS makes his return and cleans house. He grabs the mic and says these guys are the backbone of the company and won’t be held down like he was for years. Where he comes from, if someone is trying to stop your career, you bash them in the head with a stop sign. He’s going to take the cancer out of WCW starting tonight. Hopefully this lights a fire in the old vs. new story even though it’s already dying of frostbite from being so cold. Also, when Shane Douglas is your best hope, you might want to just pack it in now.

Nitro Girls.

Clip of Hogan winning the title last week.

Road Wild ad.

WCW World Title: Sid Vicious vs. Hollywood Hogan

Hogan is defending of course. Heenan doesn’t think these two have ever had a match before. Even Hudson corrects him, saying they may have but not in a WCW ring. They circle each other for a bit before Sid drops outside. Back in and Sid shoves the champion down before Hogan does something similar, though Sid doesn’t go off his feet. A test of strength goes nowhere and Sid is sent outside again.

We’re almost four minutes into the match already and a LOUD boring chant starts up. Back in and Sid kicks at the recently injured knee but Hogan blocks a weak ram into the buckle. A bunch of right hands have Sid reeling and Hogan rains down ten punches in the corner. Hogan rakes the eyes but can’t slam him with the bad knee giving out. Sid grabs a chinlock before wrapping the knee around the post, but the TNT feed goes out for ten seconds for no apparent reason.

We come back without the announcers acknowledging the break so I can’t imagine it was intentional. Back in and Sid puts on a cobra clutch of all things but lets it go and boots Hogan down, only to miss a legdrop. Hulk Up time and he slams Vicious, only to have Nash come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. Here’s the current dilemma for WCW: their options range from trying something “new” with Nash vs. Savage and having the matches be disasters or trying something old with Hogan vs. a monster, which will be more tolerable due to Hogan being able to do that match in his sleep, but still nothing we haven’t seen a thousand times. Yes those are our only two options, because we’re not getting anyone new in the main event anytime soon.

Sting comes in for the save until Rick Steiner comes in to beat Sting down. Goldberg FINALLY returns and cleans house, sending the villains to the floor for a big staredown to end the show. Of course Nash is totally cool with Sid, who was involved in attempting to murder him about a month ago.

Overall Rating: D. I know I said they needed to get back to something more basic, but could they move past 1988? We’re really sitting through Hogan vs. tall monsters and Sting vs. Flair in 1999. That’s in addition to all the lame celebrity appearances and the ridiculous amount of factions. This wouldn’t be so bad if there wasn’t an army of young talented guys that are just spinning their wheels in nothing feuds while the old guys do whatever they feel like doing because no one is going to tell them no.

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Thunder
Date: July 14, 1999
Location: Jefferson County Civic Center, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

Oh joy. It’s a taped Thunder coming off a PPV. The good thing is we’re coming off the least boring show WCW had in awhile, though on the other hand it led us to ANOTHER Hogan title reign that only people with the last name Hogan actually wanted to see. That being said, I’ll take bad over dull, and anything that gets me away from Randy Savage in the main event is a good thing. Let’s get to it.

This is a Wednesday show.

Vampiro vs. Van Hammer

Hammer throws him around to start but gets armdragged down to space things out a bit. A full nelson doesn’t get Hammer anywhere but some kicks to the chest knock him out to the floor. Vampiro hits a nice dive but Hammer easily sends him into the barricade to take over. Back in and Hammer pounds away before kicking Vampiro square in the jaw. A big slam sends Vampiro off the top but walks around instead of covering.

Vampiro comes back with some strikes and a snapmare, followed by a kick to the back. This is going nowhere for the most part. Van takes him down again and stomps away because he really doesn’t have that strong of an offense. A chokeslam of all things puts Hammer down for two but Vampiro misses a top rope splash. That’s FINALLY enough to make the announcers stop talking about Hogan returning on Monday. Hammer slugs away in the corner and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Vampiro nails him low, only to walk into the cobra clutch slam for two. They slug it out again and Vampiro grabs a rollup for a fast pin.

Rating: D+. This goes back to the problem for Thunder: the wrestling is just ok, but there’s no reason to care about these guys. Yeah Vampiro is popular with the fans, but why should I care about him? He has one off matches that don’t go anywhere and has no story to speak of. On the other hand you have the worthless hunk of flesh known as Van Hammer, who isn’t going to make things any better.

Speaking of Van Hammer, he destroys Vampiro after the match. Really? THIS warrants a continuation?

Sick Boy vs. Rick Fuller

Oh come on now. Sick Boy now has blond hair and actually looks like a bigger Dolph Ziggler if he had a brown beard. Fuller drops him with a shoulder as Tenay says this is a proving ground match. A bad looking legdrop gets two on Boy and a bad looking sunset flip gets the same on Fuller.

We keep the dull going with Fuller’s generic power offense in the corner before he hammers Sick Boy down in the middle of the ring. Sick Boy scores with a lariat but gets choked on the middle rope. Another sunset flip attempt is blocked so Fuller puts him on the top and….very gently takes him back down. Sick Boy gets two off a spinwheel kick but Fuller puts him back on the top and hits a kind of powerbomb for the pin.

Rating: F. What a disaster. Again, it’s not even that the match was horrible, but they just had nothing going on here and I had no reason to care. The match is just SO dull and uninteresting that there’s nothing to keep my attention. If the idea here was to have Fuller look like a killer, it’s failed as much as….well almost anything else WCW tried around this point.

Steve Regal/Fit Finlay/Dave Taylor vs. No Limit Soldiers

This would be Chase Tatum, Swoll and B.A. Chase and Finlay slug it out to start and Chase is already about 847 times better than Swoll. The fact that he’s only a bit above average should tell you all you need to know. They trade some good forearms with Chase getting the better of it, only to miss a charge into the corner. Off to Taylor for some very quick shots before Regal comes in to get in some offense of his own.

Regal misses an elbow though and the hot tag brings in Swoll to clean house. We go to a commercial with the good news that Swoll hasn’t maimed anyone yet. Back and thank goodness it’s Regal vs. B.A. Regal works on the arm and drops some knees, only to have B.A. make a nice comeback with dropkicks and armdrags. The Europeans take him into the corner though and it’s European uppercuts a go-go with all three getting in a few.

Finlay misses a charge into the corner but Regal comes in to prevent B.A. from making the hot tag. Then for a change of pace, Taylor comes in to prevent B.A. from making the hot tag. It’s back to Finlay for the chinlock before it’s off to Taylor for yet another chinlock. Regal comes in for some brief hammering before it’s back to Dave, who misses the third tag of the match and finally allows the hot tag to Swoll. Thankfully it doesn’t last long with Swoll running everyone over and hitting his palm strike to the chest (called a Heart Punch by Tenay, who apparently doesn’t get the concept of a PUNCH) to pin Taylor.

Rating: D. The worst part about this is the majority of the guys out here are really talented and deserve much better than this. Chase wasn’t anything special but he was fine for what he was doing. Then however you have Swoll, who is basically the Erik Watts of his day. Also, it’s so depressing that guys like Regal, Taylor and Finlay, who could teach anyone a thing or twenty about wrestling, have to job for this guy because his uncle is famous.

West Texas Rednecks video.

We see the whole Sting/Flair argument from Nitro, plus most of Sting vs. David.

US Title: Bobby Eaton vs. David Flair

What is this, a theme show? Ric and Asya will be running interference. David actually takes Bobby down with a headlock before Bobby does the same to him, albeit much faster. A hiptoss drops Eaton and he looks somewhere between shocked and frustrated. Ric tries to give Eaton a wad of cash, only to have Eaton take the money and suplex David down. Asya comes in to block the Alabama Jam before taking his place. Eaton climbs down and yells at Ric, earning a low blow from Asya. The Figure Four retains the title.

Rating: F. I’m sure you get the idea.

Recap of Vampiro vs. Konnan, Miller and Bagwell’s non-match, Kidman vs. Regal and Stevie Ray saving Booker. Even Smackdown isn’t this bad.

Kidman vs. Mikey Whipwreck

This HAS to be better. Kidman scores with some headscissors and a dropkick to start, sending Mikey out to the floor for a breather. Kidman spends too much time walking around and not paying attention, allowing Mikey to pull him out to the floor. He drops Kidman across the barricade as Tenay prattles on about Hogan vs. Nash. Back in and Mikey works on the ribs and legs with all the usual submission attempts that won’t work.

Kidman fights back with a quick powerbomb but can’t follow up. Instead it’s Mikey getting two off a slam, followed by a slingshot legdrop. Back up and he tries a suplex, only to have Kidman shove him out to the floor. A big plancha takes Mikey out again, followed by a high cross body for two back inside. Mikey nails a nice springboard clothesline, but makes the eternally stupid mistake of trying to powerbomb Kidman. The faceplant sets up the Shooting Star for the pin.

Rating: C-. At this point I think I’d have given anything a better rating. Mikey continues to be about as obvious of a cheap shot signing as you can imagine as there’s just no reason for him to be in WCW. His work is average and most of the fans don’t care about him, but at least he’s not working for ECW right?

Video on Hogan vs. Savage.

Rap Is Crap.

Tag Team Titles: Jersey Triad vs. Curt Hennig/Barry Windham

Heel vs. heel here, but maybe they’re hoping the rednecks will be over as faces in the south? Kanyon starts out on the floor as Bigelow easily hammers Curt down. It’s off to Windham for a Starrcade 1988 rematch, with Barry doing just as badly as Hennig did. Page comes in which goes a bit better for Windham. A shoulder and lariat put Page down and it’s back to Hennig, who only stays in for a few seconds.

Off to Kanyon who eats a suplex from Windham before it’s quickly back to Hennig. Now, to really make this stupid, Kendall Windham and Bobby Duncum Jr. jump up on the apron as Barry drops to the floor. Curt tags out to Kendall and drops to the floor, meaning it’s now Kendall/Bobby vs. the Triad.

So to recap, we have two heel teams both using an upgraded version of the Freebird Rule, but the team of heels that might actually get some face sympathy in this town is now cheating even more, guaranteeing that the bigger heel team is going to be less heelish here, somehow making them the faces. I didn’t believe it was possible but this company is somehow coming up with new ways to screw stuff up.

Anyway we take a break and come back with Kanyon coming in to face Duncum with Barry on the apron. Bobby drops Kanyon with a right hand but Hennig interferes for no apparent reason, allowing for a double tag to Barry and Bigelow. The others start interfering, allowing Page to hit Barry low to really take over. The other three guys are fighting on the floor, leaving Kanyon to miss a moonsault on Barry. Hennig comes in off the hot tag but everyone gets in for the double DQ.

Rating: D. For DUMB. This match was one of the dumbest things I’ve ever seen in wrestling and I can’t believe I actually watched it. WCW managed to screw up one of the basic core ideas of wrestling (good vs. bad) and couldn’t even have champions win clean in doing so. I can’t believe it but this company is somehow getting worse.

Overall Rating: G. This show is behind a failure. This was one of the worst shows that I’ve ever had to sit through, with Kidman vs. Whipwreck having the ONLY thing that was watchable. However, when you have Rick Fuller vs. Sick Boy, a David Flair match with Ric Flair stuffing money down Bobby Eaton’s tights like he was a stripper to whatever the heck that main event was to SO MANY FREAKING RECAPS, something like Kidman vs. Whipwreck is pretty quickly forgotten. This was a disaster and made me change my standard line from “it can’t possibly get any worse” to “dear goodness please don’t let it get worse.”

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Monday Nitro #196
Date: July 12, 1999
Location: Jacksonville Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Attendance: 7,945
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re past Bash at the Beach and the woman beater is World Champion. In a match that totally ignored the whole “Sting can pin Nash” rule, Randy Savage pinned Nash with the help of Gorgeous George, who turned on Savage and Nash in the span of about ten minutes, to win the World Title. Bash at the Beach was one of the worst shows I’ve ever seen so things have to pick up here. Let’s get to it.

Video on Bret Hart’s speech last week and Goldberg returning. I wouldn’t show highlights from last night either.

Gene brings out the new champion to open the show. Savage actually comes out alone for once. He talks about how some people just can’t accept what’s right in front of them. Gene asks about Sid and the girls but Savage says he’s a self made man and had to do this himself. The fans want Goldberg as Savage issues an open challenge to anyone but Kevin Nash.

With the fans clearly making their choice clear, here’s Hollywood Hogan and you can see it coming from here. Hogan wants to take him up on the challenge but Savage says Hogan is in the same category as Nash. Somehow Hogan has already confirmed the match so Savage finally agrees.

Savage video.

Nitro Girls.

I Hate Rap video. Good grief we get it already.

Vampiro vs. Konnan

Konnan gets jumped during his catchphrases and Vampiro kicks him down with ease. Heenan actually gives us some backstory, explaining that these two hated each other down in Mexico. Granted he doesn’t say why but that’s more than you usually get. Vampiro stomps away as Tony keeps hyping up Hogan vs. Savage. Ok to be fair, that’s actually a big deal. Konnan avoids a top rope flip dive and hits the rolling lariat. A powerbomb gets two on Vampiro and a DDT gets the same. The X-Factor plants Vampiro and they head outside so Vampiro can pelt a chair at Vampiro for the DQ. Tony of course thinks it’s a double countout.

Rating: D+. I still don’t get the appeal of Vampiro but at this point pushing anyone new is a good thing. Konnan and his stupid catchphrases getting beaten up is always a good thing and the fact that his buddies weren’t with him was even better. Nothing match due to the time but it’s a sign that they’re trying someone new.

Vampiro plants him again with the Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) post match.

Stills of Flair vs. Malenko last night. Dean gets the better one later on.

Here’s Cat for some dancing and to insult Buff Bagwell. Are you kidding? Bagwell pins Flair, has to beat Piper in a boxing match because of whatever nonsense reason they couldn’t have a wrestling match, and now he gets ERNEST MILLER? Anyway, Cat makes fat jokes about Buff’s mom, drawing Bagwell out for a rather tame response. They fight, Bagwell beats him up, Miller kicks him with the red shoe and Sonny counts a pin, complete with a bell.

Nitro Girls.

Dean Malenko vs. Ric Flair

Bischoff comes out for commentary. So Ric was too injured to wrestle last night but can wrestle tonight? That’s rather convenient. Dean has Benoit and Saturn with him as Bischoff compares David Flair to Erik Watts. Ric orders Benoit and Saturn ejected and we’re ready to go with Dean erupting with right hands and clotheslines. Ric’s chop is no sold as Bischoff actually says Nash was ripped off last night. Malenko shoves Little Naitch away and whips Ric over the corner and out to the floor.

Ric backpedals just far enough for Anderson to run Dean over with a clothesline. Another volley of chops has no effect but Arn comes into the ring for a double team. Now the chops work as Ric hammers away in the corner. Robinson looks away so Flair can get two off a low blow. Dean fights back with right hands but Ric kicks him low again. A big vertical suplex gets two for Flair and an atomic drop stops Dean’s latest comeback attempt.

Malenko backslides Ric but Anderson distracts Robinson. Same thing happens off a small package so Dean clotheslines Flair into a Flop. A missile dropkick gets a delayed two and Dean clotheslines Arn for good measure. There’s a sleeper from Ric but Dean rams him into Robinson. Another referee comes in as Flair hooks the Figure Four. Malenko turns it over but Asya kicks the referee. Robinson gets up and gives it to Flair via submission, even though Dean’s music plays.

Rating: C. More angle than a match here as the disappointment in the old vs. new feu…..it’s not really a feud anymore so we’ll call it “the old guys beating up the new guys out of paranoia and short sighted thinking” continues. Flair is one of the few guys willing to put someone over but this nonsense continues. At least the action wasn’t bad.

Sting comes out to save Dean and says Flair has been holding people down for ten years, even though Space Mountain is on Viagra. Now Sting is going to take up the fight for WCW and wants a match with Flair for control of the company. Ric says Sting has to beat David to get the match he wants, which Sting is of course fine with. So to recap: everything in the last few weeks of Bagwell, Malenko, Benoit and Saturn have been used to set up Sting vs. Flair to continue a feud that has lasted twelve years. Such is life in WCW.

Stills from the junkyard match.

Steve Regal vs. Kidman

This could be really interesting if it had the chance to have a clean ending. Regal has Finlay and Taylor with him as the announcers list off a ton of injuries from the hardcore match last night. Regal cranks on the arm to start but has to roll away from a wristlock. A nice headscissors and dropkick set up a headlock on Regal as they stay on the mat for a bit. Kidman cranks on the headlock but has to kick out of some rollups.

Back up and Regal LAUNCHES Kidman over the top for a beating from his buddies. Regal suplexes him down and puts on a chinlock as we take a break. We come back with Regal putting on a surfboard before it’s off to a hard chinlock with a forearm over Kidman’s face. Kidman fights up and counters a powerbomb (which Regal uses SO often otherwise) before getting a few rollups for two each.

Some nice dropkicks have Regal in trouble but he launches Kidman into the referee by mistake. Cue the Europeans for the beatdown but Finlay accidentally hits Regal with a chair. Kidman cleans house and loads up the Shooting Star but hits the top rope by mistake. Bischoff gets in to check on him but Kidman is goldbricking and rolls Regal up for a fast pin with Bischoff counting the pin.

Rating: C+. I was digging this match until they had the screwy ending. Was this whole thing just about setting up Bischoff doing the right thing? If that’s the case….well ok I guess, even though I’m not sure why I’m supposed to be interested. The story keeps starting and stopping, even though it could be used for someone a bit more important.

Regal yells at Bischoff post match but nothing comes of it. Eric sits down and says Kidman was setting Regal up for the small package but a replay shuts him up. This was kind of odd all around.

Nitro Girls.

Sid Vicious vs. Kenny Kaos

Bischoff hypes up future appearances by the Insane Clown Posse, Dennis Rodman and KISS. You know, because Megadeth did so well. The match is exactly what you would expect: big strikes, no sold offense, a camel/cobra clutch, the chokeslam and powerbomb for the pin in less than two minutes.

Post match Sid wants Sting.

More Nitro Girls.

We see Sting and Flair’s talk from earlier.

Sting vs. David Flair

Non-title. The Stinger Splash hits in about four seconds and the Deathlock goes on but Robinson won’t even look at David. Sting doesn’t care and beats up everyone in sight with Ric’s shots having no effect whatsoever. Ric hides behind Asya in the corner but she takes a Splash of her own. No match for all intents and purposes.

Recap of Hogan and Savage.

Gene brings out Finlay for the presentation of the Hardcore Championship Trophy. Finlay puts over Northern Ireland and insults America until almost everyone from the junkyard match runs out for a big brawl and Jimmy Hart steals the trophy.

They screw up the stills package by showing the bad tag team match before showing the actually good one.

Booker T. vs. Diamond Dallas Page

After the Triad’s catchphrases, Page sends them to the back to make this a fair fight. That’s quite nice of him. Feeling out process to start with Booker nailing a dropkick before they head outside for a chase scene. Back in and Booker nails the flying forearm and a superkick to take over again. The big side kick misses though and Booker crotches himself on the ropes, allowing Page to grab a suplex as we take a break.

Back with Page hitting a quick clothesline followed by a sleeper, only to have Booker fight out with his usual stuff. The Diamond Cutter is blocked but the referee gets bumped, allowing the Triad to come back out for a beatdown. A Flatliner from Kanyon gets two so he tries powder, only to have it knocked back into his own face. Not that it matters as Bigelow comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C. Another match that was just ok and should have been better given who was in there. Booker REALLY needs something to do right now as he’s just been hanging around for months. That being said, I’d much rather have him here than in Bagwell’s spot where he has to get beaten up by James Brown meets Dorothy Gale.

Post match the Triad tapes Booker into the corner for a beating. We cut to the back to see the NWO making fun of Booker, causing Stevie Ray to grab a chair and run out for the save. As annoying as a Harlem Heat reunion would be, it’s better than nothing.

WCW World Title: Hollywood Hogan vs. Randy Savage

Savage is defending and Hogan comes out to the Wolfpack music. Savage rakes the eyes to start and man alive do these guys look old. Some lefts and rights in the corner have Hogan in trouble but he won’t be rammed into the buckle. The champ is sent to the floor so the girls come in, only to have Hogan ram Madusa and Miss Madness’ heads together. The girls get into it on the floor but get dragged away by security.

We keep going after a good bit of stalling with Hogan hammering away in the corner. There are the ten punches in the corner but Hogan ducks his head, allowing Savage to kick him in the face. Hogan of course pops up and takes it to the floor before this breaks down into a wrestling match. Savage goes into the barricade and steps before Hogan blasts him a few times with a chair.

Now it’s over to the announcers’ table as the brawling continues. Savage hides behind George and nails Hogan in the face to take over. They head back inside for a whipping and choke with the weightlifting belt. More slow punching and whipping follows before Savage slams him down to set up the elbow. Hogan isn’t interested in no selling and just rolls away before Hulking Up. Cue Sid to jump Hogan but that’s still not a DQ. George hands Savage a chain but Sting runs in to break up a powerbomb attempt. The chain knocks Hogan out but Nash breaks up the cover and Jackknifes Savage to give Hogan the title.

Rating: D. The match actually wasn’t the worst in the world but it was a lot of standing around waiting on something interesting to happen. These two know each other so well that they’re going to have something above a disaster, but that’s really not saying much. At the end of the day, Hogan may be the same thing we’ve seen a million times, but he’s more interesting than Nash or Savage.

Post match Hogan celebrates but Nash grabs the mic. He welcomes Hogan back and asks him for a title shot, presumably at Road Wild, since he’s handed Hogan the title twice now. Hogan says it’s on to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This could have been much worse and is such a huge upgrade over last night. It’s still certainly not a good show or anything like that, but it’s enough to keep me from wanting to jump off a building like I did at Bash at the Beach. Hogan vs. Nash may not be the most interesting match, but it’s something new that doesn’t involve Randy Savage again.

However, there’s another major problem to deal with in WCW: following up on new developments. Look at stuff like Bagwell again. He’s feuding with the top heels and even pins one of them, then is losing to the curtain jerking nitwith Ernest Miller? Seriously? Or Goldberg, who returned last week and now is nowhere to be seen? Same goes with people like Torrie, who sided with Nash willingly, then ran back to David like nothing ever happened. And where did Luger go after returning for like a day?

So many stories start and are just dropped with no reasoning given, making it hard to get into anything new. This company needs a big chart or something with a reminder of who has something going on at the moment. They’re just starting and stopping stuff on a whim and it’s making it harder and harder to keep track of what’s going on around here. Granted I barely care after all the nonsense they’ve put me through but it’s still not easy.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: July 8, 1999
Location: Jefferson County Civic Center, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

It’s the last show before Bash at the Beach and things have gone from boring to completely insane. Thankfully this is one of the live shows which are usually far better, especially than next week’s episode where it will have been taped before the PPV, meaning they can’t spoil anything. Let’s get to it.

The announcers recap Sunday’s main event tag match.

Clips of the main event stuff from Monday which is still disturbing.

Here’s Big Kev with something to say. He’s been looking at the video from Nitro and is now sure that Sting was in on it. Therefore, using his power as champ, he’s making Sunday’s tag match a title match, meaning anyone, including Sting, can pin him for the title. Why they don’t just make it a four way is beyond me but seeing how much they can screw this up should be interesting.

Dean Malenko comes into the Oval Office and yells at Flair for breaking up their PPV match due to a bad back. Flair says it’s from carrying this company for the last twelve years. Anderson and Malenko bicker for a bit before Flair says that Dean may be the Man of 1000 Holds, but he’s not Ric Flair. Point to the Nature Boy.

Clip from Nitro of Eddie’s hunt for a thief.

Lenny Lane vs. Eddie Guerrero

Lodi’s sign: “If you can read this, you ARE NOT from Alabama.” They lock up to start and Lenny bails to the corner for a hug. Back in and Eddie fires off punches and uppercuts followed by a pair of dropkicks. Eddie throws him into the corner but gets backdropped to the apron, kicking the referee down in the process. With the referee down, the luchadors Eddie forced to unmask on Monday come out to beat Eddie down, giving Lenny the fluke pin.

Rating: D+. Thank goodness this is for a story, but you can see that Guerrero isn’t going to get any higher up the card than being the big star who is stuck in the Cruiserweight division. The story is interesting and ties back into the LWO stuff (in a way), but Eddie should be higher up the card than he is and that’s just not happening.

Jimmy Hart is in the back and invites La Parka and Silver King to join the Hardcore Invitational on Sunday.

Disco is in the ring with Gene and talks about his match on Sunday with Ernest Miller. Why they’re fighting isn’t made clear but Disco makes Mr. Miyagi and Tae-Bo jokes before promising a Brooklyn, New York beating.

Van Hammer vs. Al Green

They fight into the corner to start until Green grabs a slap to take over. Hammer throws him across the ring in response and clotheslines him out to the floor. That goes nowhere so Hammer kicks him in the face for two. The Alabama Slam and cobra clutch slam is good for the pin on Green. This was nothing.

Rick Steiner runs in and beats Hammer down post match.

Jimmy Hart tries to get Horace into the junkyard as well.

We get the Bret video from Monday.

Most of Bret’s promo from Monday.

Brian Knobbs vs. Fit Finlay

Finlay jumps him to start but is quickly sent to the floor and into the steps. Jimmy Hart (he’s a busy guy tonight) gets in a few cheap shots of his own but Finlay is able to reverse a whip into the barricade. He sends Brian into the post and goes for a table, drawing in Hugh Morrus and Jerry Flynn for the DQ.

Regal, La Parka, Silver King, Horace and Dave Taylor all come out to brawl. Remember people, this is to preview a match in a junkyard. Like, a real junkyard.

Gene is in the ring with Flair and all of his associates. Piper talks about Peter McNeley (a guy Mike Tyson knocked out in 30 seconds) making Bagwell look good this coming Sunday. Buff asked for the match (no he didn’t) because Piper would kill him in a wrestling match. Flair talks about his match with Dean being canceled (despite it never being announced on the main shows) so instead, Dean gets a US Title shot. That’s quite the punishment. If Dean loses on Sunday, Gene gets a night with Asya. Ok then.

Rap Is Crap video.

This Week in WCW Motorsports, now with Ricky Rachman.

Disco Inferno vs. Kidman

Kidman scores with a quick dropkick and clothesline. His Fameasser is countered though and Disco nails a clothesline of his own. A wristlock goes nowhere so they head outside as we hear that Regal is now in the junkyard match. That match sounds like it could be so bad that it’s amazing.

Kidman scores with a dive but Disco grabs an atomic drop back inside, only to charge into a boot. You know you would think a match with these two would be a bit more entertaining. Kidman hits a high cross body and the Low Down for two. Cue Sonny and the Cat as Kidman gets two off a top rope bulldog. Not that it matters as Cat kicks Kidman with the red shoe for the disqualification.

Rating: D+. Every time they get close to giving me something to care about, we get something like Sonny Onoo to screw it up. What happened to Kidman anyway? Oh that’s right: this company is more about screaming HOOTY HOO than having Rey and Kidman tear the house down every night. Also, can we get a match to break five minutes tonight?

Disco lays out Cat post match.

The Triad comes out and says they’ll win on Sunday because Benoit and Saturn have never come close to beating them.

Chris Benoit vs. Kanyon

This HAS to be better. Kanyon goes after him in the corner but gets taken down with chops. Benoit runs him over again but Kanyon rakes him in the eyes. That’s fine with Benoit who snaps off a suplex to send Kanyon rolling out to the floor. We get a chase around the ring with Kanyon getting in first and stomping on the Canadian, only to eat more chops as a result.

They head outside again but WAIT A MINUTE. Jimmy Hart has gotten Mikey Whipwreck into the junkyard match. We’re still not done with anything but the match as Tenay talks about Team Madness going insane in the back because they can’t be on camera. Kanyon suplexes Benoit on the floor and takes him back inside, only for Benoit to fire off more chops.

Back up and Kanyon headbutts him down, setting up a middle rope Fameasser for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Benoit fights up, only to have his powerbomb countered into a sitout version from Kanyon for another near fall. Kanyon heads up top, only to get caught in a superplex to put both guys down. Back up and Benoit starts rolling Germans, only to get drilled in the face with an elbow.

Cue Bigelow with a title belt but Benoit whips Kanyon into the big guy to knock him off the apron. Chris loads up the Swan Dive but gets shoved off by Bam Bam. Now Saturn comes out to even things up but gets whipped into the barricade. Benoit hooks the Crossface but has to avoid Bigelow’s flying headbutt. A dropkick puts the big man outside again and the Crossface makes Kanyon tap.

Rating: B-. The interference was a bit much but they let two talented guys have a good match for about ten minutes. It’s not the best match in the world or anything but after the hour and a half that I had to sit through put this just a step below Steamboat vs. Flair. Kanyon hasn’t been busting out much new stuff lately but he’s still different enough to stand out in the sea of brawlers in WCW.

Page comes out and the Triad lays out Benoit and Saturn to make sure they don’t lose any heat.

Here’s Megadeth’s performance from Monday to waste about five minutes.

Curt Hennig vs. Konnan

Konnan has to chase Bobby off the apron to start before kicking Curt in the ribs to break up a test of strength. A bulldog and dropkick put Hennig down as well, meaning we at least get some great selling. The less famous Windham interferes to give Curt control with all of his usual. Konnan comes back with the rolling clothesline and X Factor, only to have Hennig throw him outside. A huge brawl breaks out on the floor as Konnan hooks the Tequila Sunrise, only to have Barry come in with the cowbell to give Hennig a cheap win.

Overall Rating: D-. Well let’s see. Eddie loses to Lenny Lane, one match broke five minutes, the show long story was Jimmy Hart adding people to the junkyard match, despite no affiliation with the guy running it, multiple matches for Sunday were either added or changed, and about a fourth of the show was spent on videos from Nitro. Someone remind me why this show exists.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro #195
Date: July 5, 1999
Location: Georgia Dome, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 25,338
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re back in WCW’s home town now for the go home show for Bash at the Beach. At the moment there are only a few matches announced for Sunday but that’s better than we’ve been getting lately. The main story continues to be Nash stealing Gorgeous George and Savage being a psycho. Well that and the youth movement being crushed like a bug. Let’s get to it.

Opening recap of last week’s events and Savage accidentally taking Torrie back instead of George on Thunder.

The announcers do their welcome.

Juventud Guerrera vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

There’s a raised logo, presumably for Megadeth later or some stupid WCW thing, on the ramp and Chavo falls down on his way to the ring. Nice job WCW. Juvy mocks Chavo’s history with Pepe to start and gets the fans fired up. A shoulder drops Chavo and Juvy gives us a pelvic thrust. Juvy hammers away in the corner but gets dropped throat first across the ropes. Chavo follows up but takes a Stunner to put him across the ropes as well.

An early Juvy Driver attempt sends Chavo bailing as the announcers hype up Megadeth and Bret’s appearance for the third time already. On the floor now with Chavo taking over off a dropkick. Back in and we get the Gory Stretch into a Gory Bomb but Chavo drops an elbow instead of covering.

Guerrero goes up for the “I’m going to jump straight down so I can land on your raised boots” spot before they go into a pinfall reversal sequence, capped off by Juvy scoring a German suplex for two. A slam looks to set up the 450 but Chavo pops up to crotch him. Something like a sitout brainbuster plants Juvy but Sid and Savage come in for the DQ.

Rating: C. The match was fun while it lasted but Sid and Savage are almost a guarantee to bust up matches like this on Nitro anymore. Chavo is still one of the best cruiserweights without being over the top with his high flying. Juvy is starting to be insane and it works well for him when he gets it right.

Sid, wearing the World Title belt, powerbombs Juvy to set up the big elbow. The big man grabs the mic and says they want George back and won’t be held responsible for their actions. Nash and Torrie (looking as good as she ever has in WCW, which covers a lot of ground) pop up on screen. Kevin wants his belt back and thinks he should just beat up Sid tonight, but he’s been worn out this week. They banter a bit until George comes in wearing a Nash shirt, asking if she just heard Randy.

DJ Ran.

Gene brings out Ric Flair who comes out with his son. The boss takes the mic and says that since Scott Steiner has been running around the world, it’s time we have a new US Champion. That new champion will be….David Flair, due to him beating Nash by countout last week. Little Naitch comes out with a bunch of women who are all over the new champ. This brings out Buff Bagwell as balloons fall from the ceiling. Short version: Bagwell vs. Flair for the title tonight.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Vampiro

Rick yells about beating Van Hammer this coming Sunday. The champ hammers on Vampiro like the mindless brawler he is before hitting a hard German suplex. Vampiro’s kicks go nowhere as he gets dropped with a Steiner Line. The Steiner Bulldog sets up that weird arm hold Rick has been using to end this quick.

Lenny and Lodi come through some doors with Lodi giving Lenny new tights. Lenny isn’t sure that they’ll fit but Lodi says he knows ever inch of him. The doors close to reveal the word “closet”. GET IT?

Video on Bret Hart leaving due to Owen passing away. The last shot is of an empty ring.

Here’s Bret for his first public comments in months. He’s been told he has all the time he wants so he’s going to try not to rush. Bret thanks the wrestling fans on behalf of the entire Hart Family for all the well wishes they received. WCW has given him a chance to collect himself and he appreciates that. Owen wasn’t your average wrestler and he was a great human being. Bret doesn’t think there’s anyone that can say a bad thing about him. They were the closest of all his brothers and never had a single argument.

Eric Bischoff has asked him what he wants to do but Bret isn’t sure where he wants to go with his life. The Hart Family has lived and died for wrestling and there really isn’t much left for him to accomplish. All these great athletes are retiring in 1999 and they all seem so happy. He’s afraid that his career will end in a tragedy but he just doesn’t know. Bret thanks all of his fans everywhere and all of the wrestlers he’s worked with over the years. He hopes he wasn’t too stiff and that’s about it.

Eddie Guerrero comes up to Doug Dillinger and shouts in Spanish. After switching to English, he says someone has stolen his wallet. It was a masked wrestler and Eddie wants them all lined up so he can pick out the culprit. I don’t see this ending well.

DJ Ran.

The Cat vs. Jerry Flynn

This is a kickboxing match because WCW is a stupid promotion. We have a round system with Round 1 consisting of a lot of circling and some light kicks. The fans boo this out of the building as the round ends with nothing to talk about. Round 2 starts with Cat going down to the mat and receiving a warning. Flynn tries a big kick and falls flat on his back because this is a joke. Back up and Cat hits some kicks to the ribs to knock Jerry down before a big shot to the head results in a DQ for hitting a downed opponent. Seriously, that’s the whole thing.

Flynn tackles Cat and they brawl some more. This was one of the dumbest things I’ve ever had to sit through.

Lodi vs. Van Hammer

Hammer jumps him from the start and knocks Lodi all over the place. Some jumping clotheslines and a big boot send Lodi out to the floor, where he steals Heenan’s water. Lodi is sent into the barricade but Lenny low bridges Hammer down to change things up a bit. Back in and Lodi actually busts out a hurricanrana, only to try again and get dropped onto the top rop. A superplex brings Lenny in and the cobra clutch slam ends Lodi. Total squash for the sake of unfunny comedy.

Dillinger tries to get all of the luchadors together for a show up but there are some communication barriers. Cops come in and clear things up as this is going to continue.

Gene brings out Roddy Piper because this show hasn’t gone low enough yet. Roddy agrees that rap is crap but wants to talk to Sting. Here’s a clearly fake Sting who is about an inch taller than Okerlund. Piper asks him about working with Savage but Fake Sting shakes his head no. Now Piper wants to see his real face but gets another no, earning Fake Sting a neckbreaker. Piper takes the mask off and we barely see the guy’s face.

Moving on to Sunday, Piper wants a boxing match against Buff Bagwell. Why a boxing match you ask? Well we really don’t get a reason for that but we’ve had bad kickboxing so why not bad regular boxing? If that’s not enough, JJ Dillon brings in Judge Mills Lane (a former TV judge and big time boxing referee) to referee Sunday’s fight “In California in Florida!” Lane’s words, not mine. I know this sounds stupid, but it’s not like Piper has wrestled a match in years anyway so why not just let him do nothing but punch?

Nitro Girls.

DJ Ran.

Rey Mysterio Jr./Konnan vs. Steven Regal/Fit Finlay

You know, for all the bad things that WCW did in 1999, they actually built up a nice tag division. Mysterio clarifies that HOOTY HOO is the call of the soldier. Apparently Regal and Finlay don’t approve of the soldiers and want to beat some peace into the rappers. Regal powerbombs Rey and catapults him into a clothesline from Finlay. There’s the rolling fireman’s carry as Rey is in early trouble.

The Europeans crank on a Mysterio leg each but the referee makes them break it up. Mysterio finally avoids a charge in the corner and makes the hot tag to Konnan to clean some house. Everything breaks down as Konnan does the usual, including throwing Rey into a Bronco Buster on Regal. Not that it matters as the West Texas Rednecks come in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Finlay and Regal continue to work very well as foreign villains and they just look like they enjoy hurting people. The match was a way to have the Rednecks jump the soldiers and set up a match on Sunday. Who will be in that match hasn’t been announced yet but there are some combinations that could make for an interesting match.

US Title: David Flair vs. Buff Bagwell

David is defending in an angle that actually kind of works. Yeah he’s in over his head, but WCW acknowledging that he’s in over his head makes this a lot easier to sit through. Back when Erik Watts was thrown in over his head, they had to pretend he was good and it made things feel so stupid. At least here it’s making Ric look evil and corrupt and being played as an angle instead of reality.

Bagwell hammers away to start as you would expect, including planting David with a suplex. The champ finally hits a quick low blow to take over, only to run into an elbow and take the Blockbuster. Buff covers but Charles Robinson’s arm gives out. There’s a Figure Four on David but Ric and Arn come in. Buff beats them up too and puts the hold back on while small packaging Ric at the same time. Dean Malenko and Asya come in as well as this whole thing is a mess. Roddy runs out and nails Buff with something to give David the pin. Total mess but you had to expect that.

Time for Eddie to interrogate the luchadors. We have La Parka, Ciclope, Psychosis, Villano IV, a guy I don’t recognize, and Blitzkrieg. Everyone has to take their mask off but La Parka and Ciclope’s faces scare Eddie. He thinks Psychosis is a good looking guy. The guy I didn’t recognize is Cheetah Kid and apparently is Prince Iaukea under the mask. Blitzkrieg isn’t Hispanic and no one is happy with him. I’m assuming we’ll get more on this later.

The TV feed messes up and we have Hak and Chastity on a ladder. Hak was born in 1963 and started choking his doctor. He’s had to fight all his life and it’s all he knows how to do. Now he’s in WCW to get paid to fight. Hak lists off all the men he’s hurt and thinks there should be a junkyard hardcore invitational on Sunday because we can’t have hardcore matches in the arena anymore.

The rednecks come out and asks how many people here are good old boys, rednecks and people that just hate rap. They plays the song and that’s it.

Video on Savage and company.

Jersey Triad vs. Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko/Perry Saturn

Benoit runs Kanyon over with a shoulder and snaps off the Rolling Germans before we go to an early break. Back with Saturn getting triple teamed but ducking a charging Page, sending Kanyon into his partner with a clothesline. Off to Benoit who cleans house with clotheslines and a dropkick for Bigelow. He heads up but Page crotches him down and stomps away in the corner before tagging out to Kanyon. A slingshot elbow gets two on Benoit and it’s back to Bigelow for a bearhug.

Benoit actually climbs up Bigelow into a sunset flip and avoids the big sitdown splash. A double tag brings in Saturn and Kanyon with Perry cleaning house as everything breaks down. Malenko tombstones Kanyon and avoids Bigelow’s top rope headbutt, setting up a top rope Saturn splash to Bigelow, followed by the Swan Dive for the pin.

Rating: C+. It didn’t have a ton of time but you knew these guys were going to have a good match if they were given more than eight seconds. They had to give the small guys a win to set up their Tag Team Title match on Sunday, even though I don’t think Malenko has anything for the pay per view.

And now, Megadeth performs Crush Em live. After five minutes of barely understandable lyrics, the band is booed out of the arena. The lights go out and Goldberg’s voice says I’M BACK! We see his silhouette and go to a commercial. I’ll give Megadeth’s performance this though: at least their drummer was making contact, unlike Barry Windham earlier.

WCW World Title: Sid vs. Kevin Nash

Nash is defending of course but Sid has the belt itself. Before the bell, Nash tells Savage to get rid of the girls if he ever wants to see Gorgeous George again. So it’s Nash vs. Sid for that In Your House main event the world was waiting for. They head into the corner for some elbows to the challenger’s jaw followed by a running clothesline. Sid bails to the floor but Savage runs in after about a minute. The referee doesn’t ring a bell though, leaving Nash to fight off both guys. Sid decks the referee to officially throw the thing out.

Nash fights them off until Fake Sting comes out to beat him down. Cue the real Sting for the real save but Nash powerbombs him, thinking it’s the Sting that attacked him. The champ goes up the aisle and says what’s left of George is in his dressing room. Savage runs to the back and finds Torrie with George.

He gets in George’s face, demanding to know if he touched her. Savage turns to Torrie and smacks her in the face. A screaming Torrie points out that George is wearing a Nash shirt so Savage rips it off her and throws her into a hallway (George: “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS???”) as the camera cuts off REALLY fast to end the show. I know I say a lot of stuff on these shows are horrible, but this was bordering on hard to sit through.

Overall Rating: D. Leaving out the disturbing ending, this was a horrible show. We’ve reached the point where WCW has gone from boring to stupid with stuff like Mills Lane refereeing a boxing match between Bagwell and Piper, two different music performances, Lenny and Lodi beating their story into your head and what felt like a comedy sketch about kickboxing. They’re on the verge of running scared at this point, but somehow this is easier to sit through than the shows from a month and a half ago.

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Thunder
Date: July 1, 1999
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

We’re into the second half of the year now and hopefully things are going to pick up. After Monday, we have Kevin Nash with Torrie and Gorgeous George and having beaten up eight or so men at once to close Nitro. However, Sting was seen behind the wheel of the Hummer to end the show, but Sting is a weird dude so it could mean a lot of things. Let’s get to it.

We open with the ending of Nitro.

Megadeath will be performing Crush Em live on Nitro.

Bret Hart will be on Nitro for his first comments in months.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Perry Saturn

Saturn jumps Kanyon on the floor before the bell as we hear about Savage and Sid leaving with the belt itself to close Nitro. Page tries to jump Saturn but gets caught in an overhead belly to belly. A Kanyon distraction sends everyone out to the floor and Saturn keeps his control. Back in and Saturn dropkicks knocks Kanyon off the apron, only to get knocked off the apron from behind. Kanyon gets in some cheap shots and things slow down again.

We take a break (and see part of the Crush Em video) and come back with absolutely nothing different. A powerslam plants Saturn but Page takes his sweet time following up. It’s off to an abdominal stretch with Kanyon helping in an old classic sequence. After a hiptoss breaks the hold, Saturn ducks the discus lariat and superkicks Page down for two.

Back up and a Batista Bomb gets the same on Saturn but he breaks up the Diamond Cutter, only to bump the referee at the same time. Kanyon comes in and wraps a title belt around the turnbuckle. Saturn goes after him but gets dropped onto the title, giving Page a very close two count. Cue Benoit for a Swan Dive on Page but Kanyon pulls the referee out at two for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Gah I was getting into that one before the ending. That’s pretty much the only thing they could do though as you want to keep both teams strong going into the title match at the PPV. It’s frustrating but I’d rather have them do this than have a challenger lose his momentum or a title made weak.

Benoit takes out Kanyon with a suicide dive but Bigelow comes out to make it 3-2. Benoit and Saturn get destroyed, which doesn’t bode well for their title match.

No Limit Solders vs. Disorderly Conduct

That would be B.A. (Brad Armstrong) and Swoll (picture an even bigger Ahmed Johnson with even less talent) vs. Mean Mike and Tough Tom. Swoll shoves Mike down with ease to start and we get some standard “I’m a big guy with huge muscles” offense including move shoves and slams for both Conducts. Off to Armstrong for a dropkick but Mike pokes him in the eye to take over.

That’s still not enough though as Armstrong dropkicks Tom and cranks on a headlock, only to be whipped into a knee from Mike to really change control. An ax handle to the back and a jawbreaker have Brad reeling and a neckbreaker is good for two. Disorderly Conduct starts some fast tags before Mike goes up and misses a knee drop. Swoll comes in off the hot tag and cleans more house as everything breaks down. Armstrong is whipped into Tom in the corner, setting up a palm strike to the chest to give Swoll the pin. Yeah the guy is about 6’6 and 340lbs and his finishing move is a palm strike.

Rating: D. Basic tag match here but I’m not sure how to feel for Armstrong. He was a talented guy but the only way he could get out there is to carry this guy due to the powers of nepotism (Swoll was Master P.’s cousin). On the other hand, it’s better than sitting at home and never getting on TV.

La Parka vs. Eddie Guerrero

The camera makes sure to get a shot of a guy in an LWO shirt. They’re actually trying for some continuity on this story and I’m digging it for a change. La Parka goes after him in the corner to start but Eddie is too quick for him. They send each other into the corner before Eddie tosses Parka out to the floor, following him out with a big dive. The announcers finally stop talking about Megadeath and Bret Hart for a second but the dive only has so much power.

La Parka is sent into various metal objects before going back inside. Eddie misses the slingshot hilo but nails La Parka in the back of the head before slingshotting onto him for two. We take a break and come back with La Parka firing off some hard kicks to Eddie’s back. He shouts into the camera that the LWO is dead, which I thought was a foregone conclusion. A chinlock goes nowhere so Eddie nails his tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to send La Parka rolling to the floor, where he picks up the chair.

Eddie follows him out and takes a chair shot to the ribs, which the referee doesn’t seem to mind. Back in and we hit a variety of chinlocks and chokes, followed by a belly to belly to put Guerrero down. He’s not down enough for La Parka’s corkscrew moonsault though and the crash lets Eddie run to the top for the Frog Splash and the pin.

Rating: C+. Eddie has been on a roll since he got back and this was no exception. This is what was always fun about the cruiserweight division: even the second and third string guys were capable of having a good match when they were given the chance. It’s a nice little TV match and that’s more than you usually get out of this show.

Savage is freaking out when his phone rings. We cut to Kevin Nash on the other end, getting a massage. Savage wants Gorgeous George back so Nash tells him to go to 16^th and Norfield in 14 minutes and wait by the pay phones. The look on Savage’s face is priceless as he’s just stunned that this is happening.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

I Hate Rap video.

Silver King/Villano V/El Dandy/Damien vs. West Texas Rednecks

Barry quickly sends Silver King into the corner to start but misses a charge and eats a missile dropkick followed by a superkick. The Undoubtable El Dandy and Kendall come in with the less famous Windham hammering away and getting two off a backslide. Villano comes in with a clothesline to Kendall, sending him over to tag in Bobby.

Duncum takes a quick beating but it’s off to Damien vs. Hennig as the fast tags continue. Curt chops away in the corner and nails the knee lift. Damien tags Dandy back in for a jam up right hand to Hennig to take over. The luchadors start quadruple teaming Hennig until everything breaks down and Kendall grabs a bulldog on Damien for a pin.

Rating: C-. Not as bad as I was expecting here as they kept this moving. I’m glad they went with this formula too as there was no real need to have the Rednecks beat up a luchador for awhile or waste a lot of time in trouble when the ending is totally obvious. Nothing match but it could have been much worse.

Savage gets to the payphones and tries to figure out which one is ringing until he realizes it’s his own cell phone. Nash gives him a bunch of directions to tell Savage where to find him (two blocks down from Quick Pick in whatever city this is taking place in). Savage trying to remember all this is amusing.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Blitzkrieg

It’s a rare defense for Mysterio. We get the usual catchphrases from the No Limit Soldiers, including Armstrong in a bizarre moment. Feeling out process to start until Blitzkrieg runs into two boots in the corner and gets backdropped out to the apron. He misses a springboard spinwheel kick but catches Rey in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a near fall. A headscissors puts Blitzkrieg on the floor for a baseball slide, only to have him catch a diving Mysterio in a powerbomb on the floor.

We head back inside for some moonsaults and chinlocks from the challenger before Rey catches him in another tilt-a-whirl backbreaker (far too popular a move in this company). Blitzkrieg comes back with a clothesline but misses a springboard knee. Rey hits a kind of Stinger Splash in the corner but runs into a second clothesline. A dropkick knocks Blitzkrieg out of the air and the top rope hurricanrana retains the title.

Rating: C. This was back to the old “I do a spot then you do a spot then we both do a spot” formula that dominated the division for so long. It also furthers the idea that Blitzkrieg really wasn’t anything special in the ring and was much more flash than substance. Mysterio needs to drop the title already though as he’s completely outgrown the thing and it could be used to elevate someone else.

Savage’s Hummer pulls up on a street corner and Nash’s limo arrives a few seconds later. Nash gets out and talks about how sweet George is. Sid and Savage jump Nash until a clearly fake Sting breaks a ball bat over Nash’s back. Sid takes the girl in the back seat (clearly Torrie) and puts her in the Hummer as Nash is left laying.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Buff Bagwell

We get the usual catchphrases from both until Steiner nails him in the back with a dog collar. They head outside with Rick piledriveing on the concrete and hot shotting him onto the barricade. Back in and Buff nails a dropkick and neckbreaker because being dropped head and throat first onto concrete and steel don’t have any real effect on him. Buff gets knocked to the floor as we take a break and get to see the rest of the Crush Em video. Yeah remember that from an hour and a half ago?

Back with the champ choking with his chain and then putting on a chinlock. Again, why do we even bother with referees in this company anymore? Rick punches him in the neck a few times and we’re right back to the chinlock. After a minute or so of that, we switch to a reverse chinlock to keep things fresh. Buff fights up after two arm drops but Rick stops the comeback after about eight seconds. He puts Bagwell on top but gets kicked away as Buff loads up the Blockbuster. Not that it matters though as David Flair comes out to tase Buff (again, WCW referees are WORTHLESS), giving Rick an easy pin.

Rating: D. Again, why in the world is Rick Steiner getting this kind of a push? He doesn’t do anything other than punches and hard rest holds but for some reason he’s spent months as the TV Champion. Speaking of Steiners as champions, has Scott been seen since he beat Buff at the PPV a few months back? Also, this drops Buff to 1-3 since he pinned Flair in the eight man tag, with the one win coming via DQ and being followed by a beatdown from Sid and Savage.

Savage opens the car door and finds Torrie because Nash is not only able to beat up eight guys at once and leave with the girls, but he’s SMART too!

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling, save for the main event which was barely wrestling, was tolerable here and it brings the show up a bit. The Nash and Savage stuff is straight out of a low budget movie, which could be a good or bad thing based on your taste. However, at the end of the day we’re looking at yet another horrible main event match at Bash at the Beach because no one EVER breaks into the main event around here. The old vs. new story looks to be dead at this point with the new generation shoved back down the card to where they have been forever now. At least Piper and Flair can draw though and that’s what matters.

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