Summerslam Count-Up – 2003 (2018 Redo): HHH. Again.

Summerslam 2003
Date: August 24, 2003
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s one of the biggest shows of the year and I can’t bring myself to get excited over it. This show really hasn’t been built up very well with only the Smackdown World Title match with Kurt Angle defending against Brock Lesnar offering much interest. The rest of the show feels very flat, especially the Raw World Title match which should have been Goldberg vs. HHH. Let’s get to it.

The United States Marine Corps Color Guard presents the flag and Lillian Garcia sings the National Anthem. As always, it’s an outstanding performance.

The opening video shows a beach but the sun goes behind a cloud and the shot shifts to the Elimination Chamber. The narration basically makes it sounds like the Chamber is poisoning everyone’s souls and turning them all evil, including Kane, who isn’t even in the thing. I’d bet money that Jim Ross wrote that, thinking it sounded even more dramatic than when he gives the Cell human characteristics.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

La Resistance is defending and Bubba brings out the American flag. The Dudleys jump them in the aisle and the beatdown is on with D-Von choking Dupree with the robe. An armdrag into an armbar (FEEL THE HATRED!) doesn’t go very well as Dupree takes D-Von into the corner so the champs can take over. D-Von is right back with the shots to the head, allowing the tag off to the very loud Bubba. It might be annoying, but I can always go for a partner making noise and being active on the apron instead of just standing there.

Grenier gets tied in the Tree of Woe so Bubba can stand between his legs for a loud scream. It’s not quite table time, allowing Grenier to get in a cheap shot so the champs can really take over. Dupree grabs a bearhug, which is quite the odd visual on someone as big as Bubba. A Bubba Bomb gets him out of trouble though and the not very hot tag brings in D-Von for the house cleaning.

Dupree gets powerslammed for two but the champs clear the ring again. The double spinebuster gets two on D-Von (there’s the crowd reaction, and all it took was kicking out of the champs’ finisher). Bubba comes back in for the Flip, Flop and Fly, followed by What’s Up on Grenier. 3D connects but Grenier pulls the referee out, allowing a cameraman to deck D-Von with his camera, giving Dupree the pin. It’s the serviceman from Raw of course.

Rating: C-. The match was ok, but not exactly the hottest choice in the world for an opener. Having the Americans lose to the EVIL Frenchmen doesn’t quite get the show off on the right foot and now we’re likely to see another rematch between these teams as this feud to show off THE POWERS OF AMERICA continues. La Resistance is fine to hold the titles, but they need something more than “we are French and therefore evil”.

Post match Spike Dudley comes in and gets beaten down as well. So after the big American military opening and carrying the flag, the Dudleys lose to the heatless champions again. The Dudleys would get the belts back a month later, but instead we need to see them lose here. Of course we also needed this match instead of the World’s Greatest Tag Team, Rey Mysterio, John Cena or Christian.

Coach tries to talk to the Dudleys but makes the mistake of praising La Resistance’s success. Bubba declares that people who hate America suck and promises to get the belts back.

Christian asks Eric Bischoff why he’s not on the show but Eric blames Steve Austin. Since he can’t wrestle, he offers to be Bischoff’s backup tonight. Bischoff has a plan though and promises to tell the world what happened with Linda on Monday.

We recap A-Train running Stephanie McMahon over last month and costing her a match against Sable. This turned into A-Train vs. Undertaker and WWE actually expects us to believe that this isn’t going to turn into Sable vs. Stephanie again.

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Sable is with A-Train in a rather nice outfit. Undertaker has bad ribs so he dodges a bit to start instead of going in full steam ahead. Instead of staying on the ribs, A-Train tries a headlock, allowing Undertaker to knee him in the ribs and take over. The running DDT gets two on A-Train and Old School connects early on. A shot to the ribs finally cuts Undertaker off (thanks for finally getting the idea Train) and some forearms to the ribs are good for two.

A-Train stays on the ribs with a vertical suplex, followed by a headbutt. Cole: “It’s like being hit in the head with a typewriter.” Normally I would question that, but Cole is the kind of dolt who would do that for fun. Undertaker manages Snake Eyes and a double clothesline puts both guys down for a quick rest.

A slugout goes to Undertaker (well duh) and a big legdrop gets two. For some reason Undertaker tries the Last Ride but a shove gives us a ref bump. The Derailer of course gets a delayed two and the referee gets bumped again. That is way, WAY too popular of a booking trope these days. A-Train hits the bicycle kick to take Undertaker down but gets a chair kicked into his face for two. The chokeslam gives Undertaker the pin.

Rating: D. Matches against power guys like this can be Undertaker’s bread and butter but there’s only so much you can do to make A-Train interesting. The match wasn’t terrible and they kept it slow enough, but this Undertaker stands up for Stephanie thing is about as forced as you can get. There’s only so much you can do as a surrogate for Vince vs. Stephanie, especially when the best villain available for the spot is A-Train.

Post match Undertaker loads up the Last Ride but Sable comes in and rubs his chest. Undertaker grabs her by the throat and STEPHANIE IS BACK!!! WE CAN LIVE HAPPY LIVES AGAIN!!! Stephanie gets to do some catfighting until A-Train pulls Sable out. I guess this is what passes for a big moment around here.

Some fans in the front row think Goldberg is going to win the Chamber. Uh, thanks for that.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff, which starts off looking a lot like Shane vs. Kane. Bischoff then decided that he hated Shane for stealing WCW from him back in 2001. You know, because that’s a story people were thinking about. Eric went after Shane, including having Kane attack him and cost him a match against Eric.

Then Eric went to Connecticut and may have forced himself on Linda McMahon. It came out of almost nowhere and really was more of a complicated way to get to Kane vs. Shane. It’s more of WWE thinking you could just toss a McMahon into a story and everything would be fine, which doesn’t work as well when you do it in two straight matches.

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Before the match, Bischoff addresses what happened with Linda, saying it happened again and again and again. Now he knows where Shane gets all of his energy, so here’s Shane in a….complete non hurry actually. Shane pounds him down in the corner with reckless abandon (Or is it still Ruthless Aggression?), followed by some forearms to the ear (called crossfaces by JR).

Eric can’t make it up the aisle as Christian might be coming off like a good idea right about now. A baseball slide sends Eric into the barricade as this has been one sided so far. Shane’s dancing punches take Bischoff down again but the Coach of all people comes in to chair Shane down. Let me make sure I’ve got this straight: Bischoff thought COACH was a better option than the Intercontinental Champion? I get that they want to protect Christian from having to get beaten up by Shane but that makes no sense from Bischoff’s perspective.

Eric says he’s restarting the match as falls count anywhere with no disqualifications so Coach sends Shane into the steps for two. They head inside where Bischoff tells the production staff to cut JR and King’s microphones so Coach can do live commentary in the ring. Bischoff throws kicks as Coach does the traditional job of mocking JR. Shane finally gets in a kick of his own and scores with a DDT, only to have Coach hit him low.

That’s enough to make the glass shatter, as everyone knew was coming. Coach does the “I’m not touching you” thing until Shane shoves him into Austin, meaning the beatdown can be on. The dispatching doesn’t take long and Austin orders JR and King’s mics be turned on again. Austin is about to leave but Shane grabs Bischoff’s hand and slaps Austin in the jaw, meaning a Stunner is perfectly acceptable. Shane pulls him up at two though, as the big elbow drives Bischoff through the announcers’ table for the pin.

Rating: F. What did this accomplish? There’s no reason this couldn’t have been the end of Monday Night Raw as the big deal was Coach turning heel. Use this valuable pay per view time (some of the biggest pay per view time of the year) on the people who matter, not for the sake of making Kane look good because he never gets to do that otherwise. This was really annoying, especially when you consider everything that was left off the show so this could get a lot of time.

Beer is consumed post match because this hasn’t eaten up enough time yet.

HHH and Ric Flair get very serious with Randy Orton, telling him that he needs to focus on keeping the title on HHH and nothing more. Orton: “What? I got it.”

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending under tornado rules and one fall to a finish. Tony Chimmel tells us that this is the four way for the US Title before telling us that this is the four way for the US Title. It’s a brawl to start with Eddie staying on the floor, which might not be the smartest move in the world here. With Tajiri sent outside, Benoit snaps the Crossface onto Rhyno, drawing Eddie in for the save. Rhyno clotheslines Tajiri for two and Eddie is there for the save again. Eddie gets triple teamed but Rhyno shifts over to Benoit for some reason.

A powerslam gives Rhyno two on Eddie as it’s still all over the place, albeit not at the fastest pace. Rhyno and Benoit are sent outside, leaving Tajiri to monkey flip Eddie for two. All four are back in with Rhyno superplexing Eddie for two with Tajiri making the save. Tajiri gets the same by kicking Benoit in the head but the champ saves this time. A headscissors puts Rhyno on the floor and Eddie’s rope walk hurricanrana gets two on Benoit.

Tajiri comes back in and gets caught in the Lasso From El Paso but Benoit quickly follows with a Crossface on Rhyno. Eddie isn’t sure what to do but Tajiri making the ropes makes his decision much easier. That earns Eddie a Crossface of his own until Rhyno and Tajiri break it up. Rhyno busts up Tajiri’s spine for two and it’s Benoit rolling some German suplexes to make Tajiri feel even worse.

Tajiri manages to get in one of his own though and bridges back for a close two, leaving everyone down at once. Back up and Tajiri gets Benoit in the Tarantula, leaving Rhyno to Gore Eddie. The problem is Eddie had the US Title in his hands to bust up Rhyno’s shoulder, leaving him down in pain. Benoit’s Swan Dive gets two as Tajiri dives in for a save, only to have both of them fall outside. Eddie sneaks in with a frog splash to pin Rhyno and retain the title.

Rating: B-. This was a good match that was trying hard to be great. There were a few too many dead spots in there though and they never hit a higher gear that they were capable of, but at least they did well with what they did. Eddie stealing the pin after cheating with the belt makes perfect sense for him and it’s the right idea to keep the title on him with the roll he’s currently on.

We look at Brock Lesnar destroying Zach Gowen, who will be out for a good while as a result.

Earlier tonight on Heat, Matt Hardy accepted a forfeit win over Gowen.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle. Brock beat Angle for the title at Wrestlemania and Angle went on the shelf. While he was out, Angle and Lesnar became friends, which lead them to Vengeance where Angle won the title back in a triple threat. A few weeks later, Lesnar turned on Angle to join forces with Vince in the name of being the REAL Brock Lesnar. Brock attacked Angle in a cage and left him laying, which has only ticked Angle off coming in to the title match.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Brock is challenging and we actually get an old school rules explanation from the referee. They hit the mat to start with Angle getting the better of it (not exactly shocking) and frustrating Lesnar early on. Another takedown looks to set up the ankle lock but Kurt goes to a headlock that Brock can break far more easily. Odd thinking there. Back up and Brock shoves him away without too much effort so Angle armdrags Lesnar outside, frustrating Brock all over again.

Kurt follows him outside and starts in on Brock’s knee before sending him into the barricade. Back in and the first suplex gets two on Brock, who responds by gorilla pressing him out to the floor in a big crash (great visual with Angle just falling to the floor). Now it’s Brock’s turn for a suplex as he’s starting to look all surly. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Kurt and we hit the rear naked choke before that meant much to a lot of fans. It’s off to a regular bodyscissors instead, followed by a chinlock.

Of course Angle fights up (after Brock let go of two better holds), this time being cut down by a hard knee to the ribs. A hard clothesline drops Angle again and the move that would become known as Shell Shock (complete with walking around the ring) gives Brock two. Some shoulders in the corner stay on Angle’s ribs so Kurt hits him in the face. You don’t do that to Lesnar though and Angle gets more shoulders to his ribs for his efforts.

Brock’s big running charge goes into the post though and Kurt’s running shoulder block staggers Lesnar. A dropkick to the knee has Brock in more trouble and it’s time to roll the German suplexes (with Lesnar holding the shoulder off each one). The Angle Slam doesn’t work and Brock goes back to the ribs with a spinebuster. Since one finisher is countered, the other has to be as well so Kurt reverses the F5 into a good looking DDT for two of his own. Now the Angle Slam is good for two and Angle is even more fired up.

In my favorite Angle spot, he puts the straps back up so he can take them down all over again. The ankle lock goes on but Brock rolls forward, sending Angle into the referee. Kurt charges at him for what looks like a sunset flip but stops halfway, wrapping his legs around Brock’s neck and arm (almost in an upside down triangle choke). Since that’s not the easiest hold to maintain, Angle switches over to the ankle lock for the tap but there’s no referee.

Cue Vince to chair Angle in the back, setting up the F5 for a delayed two. Another F5 is reversed into the ankle lock to put Brock in real trouble. He grabs all four bottom ropes but the hold isn’t broken for absolutely no apparent reasons, meaning Brock has to tap to retain Angle’s title.

Rating: B+. It’s not quite their Wrestlemania match but Angle getting his win back makes sense….in theory. They’ve been building Lesnar up as the unstoppable monster for the last few weeks so it would have made sense to have him win here (with Vince’s help) before losing the rematch down the line. That being said, I’m fine with Angle retaining here as it makes sense from the long term. In other words, this one depends on how you look at it, but it’s a rather strong match either way.

Vince gets an Angle Slam through a chair to wish him a happy birthday.

We recap Kane vs. Rob Van Dam. Kane lost his mask and despite Van Dam trying to calm him down and say that he didn’t need the mask, Kane went crazy and started destroying everything in his path. This included beating up Van Dam, Shane McMahon and Linda McMahon and setting Jim Ross on fire. This seems to be setting up Kane vs. Shane, but first Van Dam gets his shot tonight.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

No Holds Barred, which is added right before the match. JR refers to Kane as the “byproduct of an inbred mongrel dog”. As I so often wonder of both JR and Jim Cornette: WHERE DO THEY COME UP WITH THIS STUFF??? Van Dam tries to start fast but gets clotheslined down in short order. They head outside with Kane sending him into the barricade but charging into a boot, allowing Rob to follow up with another kick to the face.

Van Dam gets posted though and it’s time for a ladder. Rob is smart enough to kick it into his face, followed by a top rope kick to the chest. A crossbody puts them both on the floor and of course Kane takes over again. The announcers talk about what Kane did to Linda, which is both a good and bad idea. It’s good in that it shows you what Kane is capable of and how evil he is, but it also shows you how unimportant this match is because it’s all about Shane vs. Kane down the line.

Back in and another kick to Kane’s face knocks him into the corner (there’s certainly a pattern here) as JR deems Kane smelly. Kane shoves Rob off the top and down onto the barricade as the violence starts to go the monster’s way again. The ladder to the face drops Rob again and it’s time for some simple choking. Thankfully the referee doesn’t break it up because that comes off as barring a hold, which might get a lawyer involved with his life.

Rob gets kicked outside again and this time Kane follows by going to the top, only to dive into the barricade by mistake (that looked bad on replay as Kane seemed to slip, leaving him without enough distance and sending him head first into the barricade). Now it’s Rob getting in a ladder shot, which Kane of course shrugs off.

A DDT on the floor knocks Rob silly but he’s able to drop toehold Kane into the steps. The spinning kick from the apron drops Kane again, followed by Rolling Thunder onto the chair. Kane sits up so Rob dropkicks the chair into his face for good measure. The Van Terminator misses though and a Tombstone onto the steps is enough to end Rob.

Rating: B. Nice brawl here but I couldn’t shake the feeling that it didn’t mean anything given the story they’ve already told us is coming. Rob was trying here though and made the match fun, especially with the story of the wrestling going to Van Dam and the hardcore stuff going to Kane, but we’re heading for Kane vs. Shane and everyone knows it.

Bischoff is banged up and doesn’t want to talk about his loss but Linda McMahon comes in. Eric starts stammering and gets slapped in the face as the billionaire gets revenge. I can totally relate.

Flair gives HHH a final pep talk.

The Chamber is lowered.

Long recap on the main event, which also features a look at the Chamber. HHH was scheduled to defend against Goldberg one on one but a torn groin necessitated a multi-person match because Heaven forbid HHH take a spear and Jackhammer and lose in a short match with the excuse that he wasn’t ready or was wrestling hurt or any other idea they had. Somehow we get Kevin Nash in another main event though, because that’s what the world was waiting for. There have been some personal issues added after the match announcement but it still feels a little thrown together.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Goldberg vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Nash

The intervals are three minutes this year because we need to move this along. Goldberg slips during his entrance, which is edited out of the Network version (though he goes from standing in the middle of the stage to a few steps to the right off a camera cut). Shawn and Jericho start us off as the fans chant for Goldberg. They hit the mat to start for the Flair pinfall reversal sequence before trading slaps.

Shawn backdrops him but has to switch to a small package to escape the Walls attempt. Jericho can’t hit the Lionsault so instead we’ll listen to JR mess up history by saying this title has only changed hands once before in Arizona. That’s some nice sounding trivia, but remember that this title isn’t even a year old yet and has its own lineage. Sure that doesn’t mean much, but this is the way WWE has set things up and they can’t keep it straight. Anyway, Orton is in third with a high crossbody for two on Shawn, followed by the signature backbreaker gets the same on Jericho.

The RKO is broken up though and Jericho backdrops Orton onto the steel. Now the Walls work just fine on Shawn but it’s Kevin Nash in fourth. That’s enough for Jericho to break it up and go after Nash, who isn’t happy with his new haircut. I find it rather spiffy, even as Nash throws Jericho into the Chamber wall. Nash’s side slam gets two on Orton and Jericho is busted open. Nash goes over for a Jackknife, only to get superkicked down, allowing Jericho to roll him up for the pin, meaning Nash was in there for all of two minutes.

HHH is in fifth….and Shawn superkicks him right back into the pod. Nash isn’t done yet though and Jackknifes Jericho and Orton as a parting gift. Shawn, who is down off throwing a superkick, covers both villains for two each. Everyone punches it out until Goldberg is in to complete the field. Right hands and forearms abound and it’s the spear to get rid of Orton in short order. Jericho gets launched onto the cage floor again and another spear sends him through the Plexiglas.

As Goldberg gets back in, Shawn scores with a forearm followed by the top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music misses though and it’s a spear and Jackhammer to get us down to three. The same thing gets rid of Jericho and it’s HHH (who still hasn’t gotten out of the pod) vs. Goldberg for the title.

Flair shuts the pod again and holds it shut as well as he can, only to have Goldberg break the “unbreakable Plexiglas”. Some right hands keep HHH in trouble and Goldberg sends him into the Chamber walls a few times. A clothesline takes him down again and HHH is busted open. Goldberg loads up the spear but Flair slips HHH the sledgehammer to knock Goldberg cold and the title is retained.

Rating: D. This wasn’t even twenty minutes long. The best way to describe this match would be a middle finger to the fans who are nearly dying to see HHH lose that freaking title already but we need to make sure he’s ready to give Goldberg the rub or something. I’m not sure how WWE can validate keeping the title on HHH when they have Goldberg right there and HHH can barely move, but I’m sure it’s just the right thing to do, at least according to HHH. That’s 2003 in a nutshell: cheer for whomever you want, but you get HHH.

The rest of the match was of course nothing because Goldberg was the only person who could conceivably win the thing. Instead of something competitive and compelling, it was fifteen minutes of waiting around on Goldberg, then Goldberg crushing people for a few minutes, and then HAHA IT’S THE SLEDGEHAMMER AGAIN! The ending was so deflating that there’s not

Evolution beats Goldberg down and handcuffs him to the Chamber because WWE needs to demonstrate how to book Goldberg.

Overall Rating: D. The show isn’t even that bad, but rather almost completely flat. There are a few good matches with Brock vs. Angle being a highlight but that just made me want to watch the Wrestlemania match again. The TV coming into this show has been really dull due to a lot of McMahons and while they were used more sparingly here, you could still feel them throughout the whole show. That main event really took the life out of the whole thing though and there was nothing else that was going to fix things. Not a good show, but it could have been worse.

Ratings Comparison

La Resistance vs. Dudley Boys

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: C-

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D

Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

2013 Redo: N/A

2018 Redo: F

Rhyno vs. Tajiri vs. Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B+

2018 Redo: B-

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

2018 Redo: B+

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: B

HHH vs. Goldberg vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Nash vs. Randy Orton

Original: D

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: D

That’s one of the hardest swings I’ve ever had on a show but you can see a little consistency in there somewhere.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/06/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2003-brock-vs-angle-ii/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/08/summerslam-count-up-2003-meet-the-old-hhh-same-as-the-new-hhh/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Summerslam Count-Up – 2002 (2017 Redo): He’s Still Got It

Summerslam 2002
Date: August 25, 2002
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 14,797
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Jim Ross

It’s very rare that a Summerslam is the biggest show of the year but that might be the case in 2002. Wrestlemania XVIII was in a much bigger venue and had a much bigger top match but as far as a whole card goes from top to bottom, this might have it beaten. The big matches here are Brock Lesnar challenging the Rock for the Undisputed Title and HHH vs. Shawn Michaels in a grudge match with Shawn making his first in-ring appearance since 1998. Let’s get to it.

Not much of an opening video other than the theme song over shots of the crowd.

Opening sequence.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey showed Angle up recently and Kurt wants to prove that it’s just a fluke. Angle’s singlet looks like a barber pole and Rey sneaks in from behind with a springboard ankle scissors. The ankle lock goes on in less than thirty seconds but Rey sends him into the ropes with Kurt having to duck the 619.

A hard wheelbarrow suplex sends Rey hard onto the mat and one heck of a clothesline gives Angle two. Rey’s back is bent around the middle rope and Angle is getting a bit too cocky. A one legged Liontamer has Mysterio in even more trouble but a rollup gives him a fast two. Rey is certainly sticking around well enough so far.

That just ticks Angle off though and he throws Rey with a belly to belly. Kurt misses a charge though and goes sailing over the top but the referee won’t let Mysterio fly. That’s fine with Rey who flips OVER THE REFEREE to take Kurt down. The fans are losing their mind and Rey Dropping the Dime (springboard legdrop) for two makes them even worse. Now the 619 connects and the West Coast Pop is good for a VERY near fall. Rey puts him on top for a super hurricanrana but Angle slips out and grabs the ankle lock for the submission at 9:20.

Rating: A-. What a match. This is one of the best opening matches in company history as they just do not stop for the better part of ten minutes. It’s an outstanding performance with Rey getting his big breakout performance and Angle showing that he’s still one of the best in the world.

Stephanie McMahon brags about that match and tells a production guy to tell Eric Bischoff about it. She goes into her office and….there’s Eric, who seems to be sharing the office with her. I’m sure comedy and drama will ensue.

Ric Flair vs. Chris Jericho

Standard “you’re old and it’s my time so get out” feud with the required broken guitars to ruin a mid-show concert segment as well. This is actually Flair’s in-ring debut at Summerslam. Feeling out process to start and we hear about Jericho becoming the first ever Undisputed Champion. JR: “Not too many people can claim that.” Yeah Jim. I think it’s like, one or so.

Jericho misses an elbow drop and the chops start flying. They head outside with Jericho sending him into the barricade, followed by a middle rope dropkick for two back inside. Some suplexes stay on Flair’s back so you certainly can’t fault Jericho’s psychology. This time it’s Jericho taking too much time going up though and Flair slams him right back down.

The Walls are countered into a small package for two but Jericho goes extra evil by grabbing the Figure Four (I said evil, not original). In a creative save, Flair grabs the rope and then taps out, which means the hold is broken and the submission doesn’t count. The referee gets bumped and it’s a low blow into the Figure Four to make Jericho tap at 10:23.

Rating: C+. This was fine and while I’m not wild on having Flair go over Jericho, at least he lost in a good match to a dirty finish. If nothing else it could mean a whiny Jericho and that’s nothing but entertainment. Oh and Flair low blows are always worth checking out, just for how hard he hits those things.

Ad for a Hogan DVD.

Paul Heyman loves the idea of the Hogan DVD because it looks like they’re trying to squeeze out the final few dollars from his body after Lesnar destroyed him. Tonight, Lesnar destroys the Rock.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Apparently Eddie is mad that Edge fancies himself a sex symbol. I don’t really remember that being brought up on TV leading up to this match but maybe it was subtext. Eddie snaps the back of Edge’s neck across the top rope and takes over, only to get thrown across the ring.

Edge ties him up in the ropes and hits a spear but a second attempt misses to send the Canadian outside. That might mean a bad shoulder so Eddie sends him into the steps. Back to back DDT’s on the arm including one from the top get two on Edge and we hit a Kimura of all things.

It’s off to a crossface chickenwing and then a top wristlock which is a very good idea. I get so bored watching matches where we get the same hold over and over. There are so many holds that can be used on the same body part so mixing it up like this helps so much. Edge fights back with a one armed slam and a faceplant to send Eddie outside.

It doesn’t take two good arms to dive out to the floor so Edge takes Eddie out all over again. Back in and a super sitout gordbuster gives Edge two more, followed by the Edgecution for the same. Eddie goes right back to the shoulder but walks into the spear (more on that in a second) at 11:47.

Rating: B-. This was going to be much higher until that completely ridiculous ending. Eddie spent eleven minutes working on the arm and then Edge just uses the shoulder for the spear to end the match with nothing more than a flinch? There’s no excuse for that and Edge should know better.

The Un-Americans are ready to give the greedy Americans more. More of the Un-Americans that is.

Tag Team Titles: Goldust/Booker T. vs. Un-Americans

Lance Storm and Christian are defending. Goldust cleans house to start before it’s off to Booker, who JR describes as being “as Americana as Americana can be.” The Canadians are still reeling so Storm throws Goldust over the corner to take over, setting up some of those weird hopping stomps.

Christian gets two on a backbreaker, which JR says works on the back. Something like a Boss Man Slam gets Goldust out of trouble but Christian grabs a front facelock. As you might expect, that means a missed tag so Goldust has to catapult the champions into each other.

That’s STILL not enough for the tag though as the champs knock Booker off the apron, only to miss a Conchairto. The USA chant starts up and there’s the hot tag to Booker who scores with a missile dropkick on Christian. Storm hits the referee by mistake and both champions take the same ax kick. Cue Test to kick Booker’s head off, giving Christian the pin at 9:35.

Rating: C. The match was fine but the ending brought it down a good bit with the standard WWE style finish hurting things a lot. At least we had a good match to get there and the Un-Americans are still fine for heel champions. The Test stuff gets annoying but you had to know it was coming as soon as the ref went down.

There’s a Make Out with Nidia Contest at the World. We’re moving on before that sinks in.

Stephanie and Bischoff debate women’s place in wrestling. McMahon: “It’s like mine: ON TOP!” This turns into a discussion of the Intercontinental Title match and GOOD GRIEF Stephanie’s acting is somehow worse here.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

This is Raw vs. Smackdown and Benoit is defending. A kick to the leg sends Benoit outside but he comes back in and easily takes Van Dam down until Rob starts spinning around to escape. The release German suplex drops him again though and Benoit starts in on the neck to set up for the Crossface later on.

A Dynamite Kid snap suplex gets two on Van Dam but he avoids the Swan Dive. Chris does the same to the Five Star though and it’s time for the Crossface. The long legs get Van Dam over to the ropes so Benoit shoves him off the top and down onto the barricade for a crash. Benoit cranks on the arms for a bit and slams him head first into the mat to keep Van Dam in trouble.

It’s right back to the Crossface with Van Dam quickly breaking free, only to be sent shoulder first into the post. Some suplexes onto the arm make me realize that Eddie probably should have worked something other than the arm if Benoit, whose finisher is an arm hold, was going to do this.

Another Crossface is about to be broken so Benoit switches into a dragon sleeper of all things. That’s escaped as well and Van Dam’s hair is down in a very rare sight. Rolling Thunder gets two on Benoit but he’s able to crotch Rob on top. You don’t try a belly to back superplex on a high flier though as Rob crossbodies his way out, setting up the Five Star for the pin and the title at 16:22.

Rating: B. Sometimes you just need to have two talented guys go out there and have a match. The shoulder didn’t quite play into the finish but at least Van Dam’s finisher isn’t done with his arm. I liked this more than I was expecting to and that’s always a positive, especially on a show this stacked.

Bischoff gloats so Stephanie laughs at him. WELL OF COURSE SHE DOES! How dare we suggest that Stephanie not have some kind of ace up her sleeve? That’s why people get tired of Stephanie: she almost NEVER has to give up anything and it gets old in a hurry. I’m sure she’s stolen some other talent and Bischoff will be crushed while Stephanie gets to dance around and talk about how great Smackdown and its fans really are.

Video on the Un-Americans to set up Test vs. Undertaker.

Undertaker vs. Test

JR says Undertaker has a big home field advantage. I get what he’s going for but we’re MUCH closer to Canada and Toronto in general than we are to Houston. But then again, never underestimate how hard an American announcer is going to push his countryman in a feud like this. Undertaker starts with a hiptoss of all things but a knee to the ribs cuts off some driving shoulders.

Test shoves the referee into the ropes to break up Old School and since this isn’t Raw, that’s not a DQ. After a quick trip to the floor, Test very slowly hammers away in the corner and drops a knee on the ribs. It’s off to an armbar of all things until Undertaker fights up and suplexes his way to freedom. AMERICAN freedom that is.

The pumphandle slam doesn’t work so Undertaker plants him with a chokeslam for a delayed two. Cue Storm and Christian for a distraction so Test can get in the big boot for two of his own. Test grabs a chair and shoves the referee down, allowing Undertaker to kick the chair straight back into his face. The Tombstone ends Test at 8:20.

Rating: D. This was fine for a long Raw match but on a show with this much talent around, it’s only going to go so far. Undertaker winning is fine enough as it’s really hard to buy Test beating someone who was in the main event of last month’s pay per view going toe to toe to toe with Rock and Kurt Angle.

Undertaker goes into the crowd and grabs an American flag for some posing.

We get a long and very good recap of HHH vs. Shawn Michaels. They used to be friends and Shawn came back as part of the NWO. After the team was disbanded, Shawn came back again and was made into HHH’s manager. That wasn’t cool with Shawn and his Texas pride so HHH beat him up twice in a row, including putting Shawn through a car window. Shawn is willing to have one more fight (not match, but fight) here tonight.

HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Anything goes and unsanctioned with Shawn in jeans. Shawn hammers away to start and spears HHH down for more right hands. They’re quickly on the floor with Shawn ramming him head first into the post. It’s time for some toys, including a trashcan to HHH’s head and a top rope right hand for the same.

Sweet Chin Music misses less than three minutes in and Shawn walks into a spinebuster for the first real shot to his bad back. Like a smart villain, HHH starts in on the back but Shawn says bring it, earning himself a kick to the chest. One heck of a chair shot to the back has Shawn’s face in agony, which is where so much of this match’s strength comes from. Michaels could tell such a story with his face and it really does bring you deeper into the story they’re trying to tell.

Shawn gets in a desperation rollup for two but walks into the facebuster to cut him off again. A DDT on the chair gets two and we’ve got some blood. HHH steals Shawn’s belt for a good old fashioned whipping followed by a few buckle shots to the cut head. With Shawn pulling himself to his feet, it’s sledgehammer time. As is his custom though, Shawn cuts HHH off at the exactly right time, earning himself an abdominal stretch.

HHH goes for the hammer again but Earl Hebner calls him off and yells a lot. A superplex is broken up so HHH blasts him in the back with the chair again. There’s a side slam through an open chair and Shawn looks dead. You can feel the fans getting more and more into this and JR wants the referee to do a fast count. Shawn kicks out and now HHH is getting frustrated because Michaels won’t stay down.

Another side slam onto a closed chair gets the same and HHH covers three times in a row. The Pedigree is broken up by a low blow and you can feel the crowd coming back to life. HHH grabs the chair but a desperation superkick knocks it into HHH’s face to draw blood as well. Shawn hits the forearm into the nipup and the fans actually come to their feet as it’s the old Shawn one more time. A great chair shot to the head drops HHH and Shawn picks up the belt to even things up a bit from earlier.

Shawn bulldogs the very bloody HHH onto the steps to knock him even sillier. Since that’s not enough, let’s bring in a ladder too. Said ladder is thrown inside but HHH baseball slides it into Shawn’s ribs for a breather. HHH goes up top for some reason and it’s a superplex to bring him back down for two. Now the steps are brought in but Shawn drop toeholds HHH into them before knocking him outside again.

With nothing else left, here’s a table too with Shawn splashing HHH off the top through the wood. HHH very slowly rolls back in and Shawn brings the ladder inside again. The big elbow off the ladder crushes HHH and Shawn pops right back up. It’s superkick time but HHH counters into the Pedigree which is countered into a jackknife rollup for the pin at 27:19.

Rating: A+. My goodness what a performance. That’s the only way to put it as Shawn basically started all over again and had this kind of an amazing match. This was some outstanding storytelling with Michaels taking us to the very brink but fighting back until there was an actual way to believe he could pull it off. HHH was at his most dastardly here and that makes for one heck of a match. This is one of the best matches of both of their careers and the circumstances make it even more amazing. Shawn timed that comeback as well as anything I’ve ever seen and I got swept up in the match all over again. Just excellent.

Post match, HHH hits a celebrating Shawn in the back with a sledgehammer to go biggest heel ever. Shawn does a stretcher job, seemingly putting him out of action for a long time. Oh and one more thing: for some reason HHH has tried to claim that this match was forty five minutes long. Even if you count the entrances and the post match stuff, it’s less than thirty six minutes total. That’s a big stretch even in wrestling, which is covering a lot of ground.

Here’s Howard Finkel of all people to talk about how he hasn’t been here since Wrestlemania II but you’ll always have him because of loyalty. Cue Trish Stratus (who has been feuding with a sexist Finkel) but the Fink doesn’t want to hear from someone who thinks she’s hot stuff because of her looks. Trish hits on him and Finkel makes sex jokes until Lillian Garcia (who is having the real issues with him) to slap Howard in the face and kick him low. This was just a way to calm things down after the previous match but it was still stupid.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. The Rock. Lesnar won the King of the Ring tournament to earn this show and Rock won the title at Vengeance. Brock has run through the company but this is by far his biggest test to date.

Undisputed Title: Brock Lesnar vs. The Rock

Lesnar is challenging and has Paul Heyman in his corner. The fans are ALL OVER Rock as he charges right into a belly to belly, further banging up his already injured ribs. Some backbreakers have the fans cheering for Rock though and Brock takes him outside for a beating in the crowd.

Back in and another belly to belly sends Rock flying for two. Heyman even gets in a little choking as Rock’s right hands are cut off by a powerslam. Brock charges into the post and three straight clotheslines finally put him down for two. It’s off to a bad Sharpshooter with Rock nowhere near sitting on Brock’s back.

Heyman finally gets on the apron for a distraction but Lesnar saves his agent from a Rock Bottom. The distraction lets a chair go into Rock’s ribs, setting up a bearhug into a waistlock on the mat. This stays on WAY too long but to be fair, Lesnar isn’t really capable of having a long match on his own just yet.

Rock punches his way out but takes one heck of a running shoulder to the ribs in the corner. Lesnar gets punched (you might notice a pattern emerging here) outside again and it’s announcers’ table time. Instead though Brock gets catapulted into the table and Heyman takes a very slow motion Rock Bottom through the table.

Back in and the Rock Bottom only gets two but Lesnar grabs one of his own (JR: “Brock Bottom?”) for another near fall. The spinebuster looks to set up the People’s Elbow but Brock jumps up for a BIG clothesline. Brock can’t hit the F5 but reverses the Rock Bottom into the F5 for the pin and the title at 16:02.

Rating: B. It’s not a classic but the key thing here is that Brock reversed Rock’s finisher into his own for the completely clean pin. Heyman hadn’t been a factor for about five minutes so the pinfall is WAY more important. Lesnar won because he was better here (ignoring the rib injuries but that was hardly cheating). This was a good match but it’s important and well done which is all that matters.

Overall Rating: A. This is one of the best pay per views the company has ever put on and pretty easily the best Summerslam ever. The worst match of the night was Undertaker vs. Test and even that was watchable. Throw in a masterpiece like HHH vs. Michaels and this is an instant classic, which isn’t often the case at Summerslam.

Ratings Comparison

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A-

2017 Redo: A-

Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair

Original: B

2013 Redo: C

2017 Redo: C+

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: B-

Un-Americans vs. Booker T/Goldust

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C

Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Test

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

The Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A

Still a masterpiece.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/05/history-of-summerslam-count-up-summerslam-2002-best-summerslam-ever/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/07/summerslam-count-up-2002-the-performance-of-a-lifetime/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Money In The Bank 2022: Been There

Money In The Bank 2022
Date: July 2, 2022
Location: MGM Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith, Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s the ladder show as we focus on becoming something close to the #1 contender. That means the show is going to be built around the two ladder matches, so there aren’t going to be many options for the rest of the card. There are enough title matches around to fill things out, but this is all about the ladder matches. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at a bunch of the people on the show and how they could make it big tonight.

Becky Lynch vs. Liv Morgan vs. Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Shotzi vs. Raquel Rodriguez vs. Lacey Evans

Women’s Money In The Bank ladder match. It’s a brawl to start of course with Asuka being left in the ring to strike at Becky. A sliding kick to the face drops Becky and Asuka takes a ladder that Shotzi tries to bring in. Becky kicks Asuka down but can’t drop a ladder onto her. Rodriguez comes back in and powers away with the ladder, including suplexing Liv and Becky onto it at the same time. Everyone gets together and drives Rodriguez into the corner, with Liv being laid on the ladder in the same corner.

Evans hits the slingshot Bronco Buster onto Liv onto the ladder. A bunch of people are piled onto Liv, setting up Becky’s middle rope legdrop. Bliss hits a Molly Go Round onto Liv/Becky/Asuka and is the only one left standing. It’s way too early for that to work though as Rodriguez makes the save, only to get struck down by Bliss. Asuka is back in with a German suplex on Bliss but it’s Evans cutting off the climb.

Shotzi and Lacey take turns pulling each other off the ladder until Rodriguez goes up. Morgan joins them and it’s a sunset bomb to plant Evans in a landing that almost went badly. Becky is back in and goes up but the ladder is off center (and seems to be broken), allowing Shotzi to pull her down. Asuka makes another save and goes up but Rodriguez pulls her down. Their fight knocks the ladder onto the ropes until Rodriguez goes outside to get a fresh ladder.

Instead of climbing, she bridges the ladder between the ring and the announcers’ table and brawls with Asuka. That’s countered into a cross armbreaker but Becky comes in and lays Asuka on the ladder. The legdrop from a ladder onto Asuka drops both of them and everyone is down again. A bunch of ladders are brought in (as tends to be the case) and everyone goes up, with only Lynch being left. Liv goes up but her ladder is knocked over, only to have her kick the rope on the way down and bounce back up, allowing her to knock Becky over. Liv gets the briefcase at 16:29.

Rating: B-. There were some big crashes and falls in there and that is the main thing you want in these matches. As usual it was all about the carnage and insanity but they did something smart by going with someone who has been needing the big win. Now do it right with Liv and you might be going somewhere, though the Nikki Ash result is always a possibility.

We see Cody Rhodes’ preview of the men’s ladder match from Raw.

We recap Theory vs. Bobby Lashley for Theory’s US Title. Lashley wants the title, while Theory keeps bragging about how great he is and seems to think he is built better. It is kind of a weird setup but the match could work.

US Title: Theory vs. Bobby Lashley

Theory is defending and gets spinebustered early. The threat of a spear sends Theory outside so Lashley picks him up but Theory blocks the posting. Lashley gets posted instead but is right back up with a posting of his own. Back in and Theory manages a hard shot to the face for two and we hit the chinlock. Lashley finally powers out and starts striking away, including the running clothesline in the corner.

The delayed vertical suplex is countered so Lashley pulls him out of the air for a gorilla press powerslam instead. Back up and Theory sends him into the middle buckle, setting up the rolling dropkick for two. A Town Down is countered into a rollup for two more but Theory goes to the eyes. Theory hits his own spear but Lashley reverses A Town Down into the Hurt Lock for the tap and the title at 11:00.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what to think about this, but if there is no Raw World Champion, making Lashley the top singles champions makes as much sense as anything else. Theory losing clean is a little weird, but Raw is in a weird place at the moment so this might be the best thing they can do. Not much of a match, though at least they didn’t stick around too long.

Liv Morgan doesn’t know who she is cashing in on but for now, she is celebrating.

We recap Carmella challenging Bianca Belair for the Raw Women’s Title. Rhea Ripley is injured and can’t get the title shot, so Carmella won a multi-woman match to earn it instead. They have argued a good bit since then.

Raw Women’s Title: Carmella vs. Bianca Belair

Carmella is challenging and we get the Big Match Intros. Belair sends her to the apron to start and Carmella needs a breather. Back in and Belair does the kiss it spot in the corner, setting up the moonsault over her out of the corner. A backbreaker sets up a backbreaker to put Carmella down but the handspring moonsault misses. Carmella finally manages to snap the throat across the top rope and starts cranking on the arm.

That’s broken up so Carmella pulls her down by the hair. There’s a delayed vertical suplex on Carmella and Belair takes her into the corner to pound the turnbuckle in the vicinity of Carmella’s head. Carmella is back with the low superkick for two but she talks too much trash, meaning it’s the KOD to retain the title at 7:11.

Rating: C-. Yeah what else were you expecting here? Carmella had no chance of winning and was nothing more than a fill in challenger, so Belair running her over to keep the title made perfect sense. This was there as a way to get the title on the show and that’s all it needed to be. Don’t go further than that and things will be fine.

Post match Carmella jumps Belair again and forearms her down a bit. That is the most WWE thing I can think of at the moment: the match was just a step above a squash and had a clean finish but we need to keep it going because WWE doesn’t know how to just end a feud already.

We look at Logan Paul signing with WWE and he wants Miz at Summerslam.

Alexa Bliss and Lily plug the WWE credit card.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Street Profits

The Usos are defending and say you should bet on the Bloodline. The Profits come through the crowd for an old school feel. Dawkins takes over on Jimmy to start but it’s way too early for the frog splash. The Usos take a breather on the floor and we pause a bit until Jey comes in for a change. A running forearm drops Ford, who is right back with a crotch chop to Jimmy on the apron.

Dawkins drops Jey for two but a double spinebuster plants Dawkins for a change. Jimmy hits a dive to drop Dawkins on the floor and a right hand cuts off his comeback attempt back inside. Another shot to the face staggers Dawkins but he drops Jimmy, allowing the diving tag to Ford. Jey is fine enough to superkick a diving Ford out of the air for two and it’s time co choke on the ropes.

This isn’t exactly burning up the mat and Jimmy hits an apron kick to the face rocks Ford again. Something close to a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two on Ford and some more slow shots to the face keep him down. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Jey superkicks Dawkins off the apron. Ford manages to get in a shot of his own but a springboard is cut off with another right hand.

With the beating continuing, Ford finally manages to knock Jimmy to the floor and brings Dawkins back in to clean house. The big running flip dive drops the Usos and the lifting swinging neckbreaker gets two on Jimmy. Everything breaks down and a tackle into a German suplex drops Jimmy for two. A Doomsday Blockbuster gives Ford two more and the Profits are shocked.

Dawkins gets to clean house again but it’s back to Ford, who gets double superkicked for two more. Cole: “We’re going to have an hour Broadway tonight here in Vegas.” No Cole, we aren’t. Ford hits the big running flip dive onto the Usos, setting up the frog splash for two back inside with Jimmy making the save. We get the big staredown and then the slugout until Dawkins is sent into the barricade. The 1D finishes Ford at 23:01.

Rating: B. This felt like the tag team version of Edge vs. Randy Orton at Vengeance 2004: it was long and the second half was good, but the first ten minutes were going in slow motion and seemed to be there to pad the runtime. The Profits weren’t completely nothing challengers and a title change wasn’t totally out of the question, but this could have have about eight minutes cut out and been a much tighter match.

Post match replays show that Ford’s shoulder was off the mat so the Profits aren’t happy.

We get a vignette of someone walking in the dark, featuring a bunch of candles, a cross, a medal hanging and someone walking in the dark. Not sure what that was.

We recap Natalya vs. Ronda Rousey for Rousey’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Rousey is defending, Natalya attacked her one night and ALMOST made her tap to the Sharpshooter, personal insults were thrown, time for a title match.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Natalya

Rousey is defending. Feeling out process to star with Natalya taking her down into an armbar. The early ankle lock is broken up but Natalya counters the basement dropkick into another ankle lock. That sends Natalya straight to the rope so she hits the discus lariat for two. Natalya works on the arm and even pulls Rousey out of the corner, setting up something like a seated abdominal stretch.

With that not working, the frustration starts setting in but another discus clothesline is countered into a throw. Piper’s Pit is countered into a rollup, which is countered into a rollup to give Rousey two. Another armbar is countered into the Sharpshooter from Rousey, who throws in a Shawn Michaels pose at the same time.

Natalya breaks out and sends her outside to bang up Rousey’s knee, setting up the Sharpshooter on the apron. With that broken up via gravity, Natalya gets thrown down and has to beat the count back in. They trade more submissions until Rousey counters a Sharpshooter into a cross armbreaker to retain at 12:33.

Rating: C. This wasn’t great but again, there was no drama on who was going to win here. Natalya is fine as a hand in the ring and the submission stuff was good, but it felt like a lot of waiting around until Rousey caught her. Rousey needs someone to give her a challenge or at least get a shake up of some kind, because this isn’t working very well.

Post match Rousey can barely stand but here is Liv Morgan with the briefcase.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Liv Morgan

Rousey is defending and picks the ankle to start. Morgan kicks the bad leg though and a rollup gives her the pin and the title at 27 seconds.

Post match Rousey congratulates Morgan and leaves so Morgan can soak in the YOU DESERVE IT chants. What a great way to make Rousey look pathetic, as she more or less said “oh well, lost the title, time to leave.”

Video on Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar at Summerslam.

Riddle vs. Seth Rollins vs. Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Sami Zayn vs. Madcap Moss vs. Omos

Men’s Money In The Bank ladder match….and hang on because here is Adam Pearce to add someone to the match.

Riddle vs. Seth Rollins vs. Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Sami Zayn vs. Madcap Moss vs. Omos vs. Theory

Still the Men’s Money In The Bank ladder match. A bunch of people go after Omos to start but he shrugs them off and hits people with the ladder. Sami hides behind the post as Sheamus comes in for some failed slugging attempts on Omos. The swarming slows Omos down again until a Claymore puts him on the floor. That leaves Sheamus and McIntyre to slug it out so Theory tries to go up the ladder, earning himself an exchange of forearms to the chest from Sheamus and McIntyre.

Rollins comes in to send them outside and tosses a ladder onto them for a bonus. Riddle jumps Rollins and backdrops him onto the ladder but Sami sends Riddle outside. Back in and Riddle goes up, with Moss being right there to meet him. Omos makes the save and pulls both of them off, including a powerslam to Riddle. Everyone goes after Omos, this time using ladders to put him down again. With Omos buried under a bunch of ladders, most of the remaining people go up some ladders with Theory being the last man standing.

Moss pulls him down for a fall away slam so Sami goes up, with Moss powerbombing him into a ladder bridged in the corner. McIntyre and Moss slug it out on top of the ladder until Moss goes down. Sheamus breaks it up and hits White Noise but Riddle avoids the Brogue. The hanging DDT out of a ladder plants Sheamus and the Floating Bro off the top of the ladder hits a pile of people. Omos is back in and gets to wreck some people until Riddle slows him down.

Theory tries to go up but gets chokebombed back down. A Brogue Kick into a Helluva kick into a triangle choke has Omos in trouble and Moss helps toss Omos over the top. More group beatings slow Omos down again and it’s a team powerbomb through the announcers’ table. Everyone else brawls on the floor until Sami goes up, only to have McIntyre make the save. Sheamus takes both of them down but Futureshock drops Sheamus as well.

That lets McIntyre go up but Butch comes in to make the save with a choke on the ladder. McIntyre is brought back down and Brogue Kick takes him down again. Sheamus puts the ladder onto McIntyre and goes up, only to have McIntyre shove him off for a huge crash. The Claymore drops Butch but Sheamus makes another save. Sami shoves both of them into a ladder in the corner though and goes up, only to have Moss make the save.

Moss almost gets the case (they had me for a second there) until Rollins pulls him down for a Stomp. Riddle is back in with a ladder that is less than a foot away from the briefcase and goes up, with Rollins on a shorter ladder next to him. They slug it out with Riddle being knocked down but coming back up for a super RKO to leave everyone down. Riddle makes the slow climb until Theory makes a faster climb, knocks Riddle down, and wins at 25:26.

Rating: B. The match was good, but this is the ceiling for most Money in the Bank matches. It felt like we have seen every single thing they were doing in here before and adding Theory at the last minute just made it feel all the more obvious that he was winning. These matches are build on the car crash formula and that is only going to get you so far when you have so many people involved and are trying to get in so many things. I haven’t been a fan of these things for awhile and this was a good example of why.

Theory poses a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. As a show, as a match and as a concept, Money In The Bank is feeling more played out every year. The ladder matches didn’t do much and I have little reason to believe that Morgan is now going to join the upper echelon of the women’s division. Theory will hold the briefcase for awhile, but it’s hard to imagine him taking the title anytime soon. I do like pushing some fresh people with the ladder matches, but Liv more or less using a cheat code to get the title doesn’t give me much hope.

Other than that, there was the usual good and bad from WWE, though nothing you really need to watch. Overall, I did like the show enough, but it wasn’t a show that interested me on paper and that is how Money In The Bank tends to be. Even WWE seems to be more interested in Summerslam and based on the fact that this wasn’t in a stadium, the fans might be agreeing.

Results
Liv Morgan won the Women’s Money In The Bank ladder match
Bobby Lashley b. Theory – Hurt Lock
Bianca Belair b. Carmella – KOB
Usos b. Street Profits – 1D to Ford
Ronda Rousey b. Natalya – Cross armbreaker
Liv Morgan b. Ronda Rousey – Rollup
Theory won the Men’s Money In The Bank ladder match

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Hell In A Cell 2022: That Hurts Just Looking At It

Hell In A Cell 2022
Date: June 5, 2022
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole

It’s time for one of the big gimmick shows and I think you know what is headlining. However, things have changed a bit at the last minute, as Cody Rhodes has suffered a torn pectoral muscle, meaning his match against Seth Rollins will be more than a bit different. The match is still on and inside the Cell, but I’m not sure how much Rhodes can do. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at some of the history of the Cell before moving on to talk about almost every match on the card.

We recap Bianca Belair defending the Raw Women’s Title against Asuka and Becky Lynch. Belair won the title from Lynch at Wrestlemania but Asuka then returned and wanted into the title picture. Now Lynch has jumped back in as well, meaning the triple threat is the only option.

Raw Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch

Belair is defending and it’s Becky dropping to the floor to start. Belair tells Asuka to bring it so it’s a clothesline to take her down early on. Lynch takes Asuka’s place so Belair slams her off the top and looks rather pleased. Asuka comes back in to clean house though and Becky is down again. That lets Asuka go up but Becky Iconoclasms her down onto Belair for two each in a smart move.

A Hennig necksnap gets two on Belair and Lynch kicks away at Asuka. The middle rope Fameasser knocks Belair out of the ropes for two and the top rope legdrop gets the same, with Asuka making the save this time. Asuka wins a strike off with Lynch and snaps off a German suplex for a bonus. There’s the running hip attack for two but the Asuka Lock is countered into a rollup for two.

The Disarm-Her is broken up but so is Belair’s KOD. Belair hammers away at both of them in the corner at the same time and the handspring moonsault gets a double two. With that not working, Belair puts Asuka on top but has to kick Asuka away. Belair moonsaults over Asuka but gets caught in a Codebreaker, with Becky taking one of her own. The double hip attack gets two each so Asuka ankle locks both of them at once.

That’s broken up as well so it’s Belair putting Asuka down on the floor, only to walk into the Manhandle Slam from Lynch. Asuka makes a diving save and everyone is down. Back up and Asuka misses the hip attack, allowing Belair to grab the Disarm-Her in the ropes. Belair breaks that up with the KOD attempt but gets knocked out to the floor. The Asuka Lock has Lynch in trouble but Belair comes in off the top with…..something that doesn’t seem to have been timed right. The hold is broken up anyway and Belair is sent into the buckle. Lynch Manhandle Slams Asuka so Belair is right there to steal the pin and retain at 18:16.

Rating: B. This was the action packed match that you would have expected and it worked out rather well. The ending doesn’t surprise me at all as Asuka seemed to be there to take the fall so Lynch and Belair can continue to look strong on the way to whenever their next showdown may be. It might not have been a classic, but this was the best choice for a hot opener that they had.

Cedric Alexander tries to talk his way onto MVP’s good side but MVP insists that the Hurt Business is done.

We recap MVP/Omos vs. Bobby Lashley, which is all about Lashley wanting to get his hands on MVP for good. This has involved three Omos vs. Lashley matches and adding MVP is the st they can do for some fresh blood.

MVP/Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

MVP starts but immediately hands it off to Omos for the big staredown. Lashley slugs away but isn’t willing to go for a test of strength. Instead, Lashley kicks him down again but Omos drops him with a few shots. Now MVP will come in to kick away but MVP goes after the eyes. Omos comes back in but Lashley knocks MVP to the floor and kicks Omos down. A suplex attempt is countered into a gordbuster though and Omos drops him face first onto the turnbuckle.

There’s a running boot to Lashley and they head outside, with Omos awkwardly driving him through the barricade. Back in and MVP gets one before pounding away at the downed Lashley. A quick spear hits MVP but Omos makes the save. Cue Cedric Alexander for a failed interference attempt on Omos, who shoves him to the floor. Another spear cuts Omos down and the Hurt Lock finishes MVP at 8:17.

Rating: C. This could have been on any given edition of Raw and I don’t think that is much of a surprise. Lashley has now run through both of them and there is little more to do, unless you want to have Lashley crush MVP as well. I would hope not as it is time to move on, but at least they have made Lashley look like a giant slayer.

Post match Lashley is fired up and holds up a fan’s WWE Title. Lashley vs. Reigns would be a fine title match, assuming Reigns ever bothers to show up.

Commentary confirms Cody Rhodes’ torn pectoral muscle but he will be in the Cell against Seth Rollins anyway.

Kevin Owens vs. Ezekiel

Owens has been going nuts in an attempt to prove that Ezekiel is really Elias. How this match will help him accomplish that isn’t entirely clear. Owens yells to start so Ezekiel hits a jumping knee and a top rope elbow for a very early two. That sends Owens outside so Ezekiel beats him up and then sends him into the announcers’ table. A posting cuts Ezekiel of though and it’s a backsplash for two back inside. The middle rope moonsault gives Owens the same and frustration is setting in. Owens: “THAT’S ELIAS!!!”

The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by some choking, with more screaming, on the ropes. Back up and Ezekiel slugs away, only to get caught in a tornado DDT for two. The Swanton hits knees though and Ezekiel gets a needed breather. Ezekiel unloads in the corner and hits some running splashes, followed by a spinebuster for two. The pop up sitout powerbomb gives Owens two of his own and now he wants Ezekiel to admit it. That earns Owens another knee but this time Owens catches him on top. A superkick into the Cannonball sets up the Stunner to give Owens the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C. Ezekiel has been having some better matches and this was his best yet, but I’m not sure why you would have Owens win clean here. It doesn’t help Owens prove Ezekiel’s identity but it takes away a lot of Ezekiel’s momentum. This doesn’t seem to be the most logical way to go, but maybe they have some kind of twist coming in the whole thing.

Quick recap of Judgment Day vs. AJ Styles/Finn Balor/Liv Morgan. The team wants Styles to join but he keeps saying no, so destruction has been promised.

Judgment Day vs. Liv Morgan/AJ Styles/Finn Balor

It’s a big showdown and brawl to start with Morgan hurricanranaing Ripley into the corner. Back up and Ripley hits a headbutt, setting up a delayed vertical suplex. Morgan is back up with a middle rope dropkick and it’s off to Styles vs. Priest for a change. A Pele kick rocks Priest so Balor comes in to start on the arm. Priest manages to get in a cheap shot though and Balor is sent outside, with Edge sending him into various objects.

Back in and a hard whip into the corner rocks Balor again. A flapjack cuts off the hot tag attempt and it’s Priest grabbing the chinlock. That’s broken up and Balor hits a Pele, allowing the hot tag to Styles. House is cleaned and the Phenomenal Forearm drops Edge but Priest breaks up the pin. Morgan and Ripley come back in with the former grabbing another hurricanrana. A crucifix bomb gives Morgan two but she has to escape Riptide and hands it back to Balor.

Everything breaks down again and Balor/Styles hit stereo slingshot dives. Back in and Ripley breaks up the Coup de Grace but Styles is back in with the Phenomenal Forearm to Priest. Edge posts Styles but Balor is back up with the Sling Blade. There’s the shotgun dropkick in the corner as a trainer can be seen checking on Styles. Ripley’s distraction breaks up the Coup de Grace so Morgan cuts her off, only to have Edge spear Balor down for the pin at 16:04.

Rating: B-. Good enough match here, though this feud needs to end as Judgment Day needs to move on to someone else. I’m not sure who that is, but they have soundly beaten Styles and company and need to go do something else. Maybe someone jumps onto the team tomorrow, but it isn’t exactly an interesting story this time around as Judgment Day has dominated everything they do against Styles.

Bobby Lashley comes up to Cedric Alexander in the back and asks what that was. Alexander says that was him doing something for himself, which Lashley can understand. Just don’t do that again.

We recap Madcap Moss vs. Happy Corbin. The team split up after Wrestlemania and Corbin put Moss on the shelf. Moss then came back a lot more serious and tonight it’s about revenge.

Happy Corbin vs. Madcap Moss

No Holds Barred. Moss doesn’t waste time in clotheslining Corbin outside and they’re quickly up by the entrance. That doesn’t last long as they’re right back in the ring, with Moss hitting another clothesline to send Corbin back to the floor. Moss grabs a chair but Corbin knocks him down, only to have Moss throw another chair at him. Corbin knocks him down again and loads up a chair back inside, only to be drop toeholded face first into said chair.

The Punch Line is broken up though and Corbin gets two off of Deep Six. Corbin puts a chair in the corner and of course is sent face first into it, allowing Moss to start chairing him down for a change. Moss knocks him outside but a charge is cut off with a chop block. The chair is wrapped around Moss’ neck and sent into the announcers’ table to knock him even sillier. Back in and the steps are placed in the corner, with Corbin fall away slammed into them. The Punch Line connects and Moss Pillmanizes Corbin’s neck with the steps for the pin at 12:04.

Rating: C. Moss’ new look and attitude make all the difference in the world for him as I could take him somewhat seriously. I don’t know how high of a ceiling he might have but this is a lot better than whatever he was doing before. Either way, this feud needs to be done, as there is no reason for Moss to beat Corbin again. That ending should write Corbin off for the time being, but it probably won’t.

Corbin is stretchered out.

US Title: Theory vs. Mustafa Ali

Theory is defending and hometown boy Ali gets a big special entrance. An armdrag sends Theory outside and there’s the big high crossbody to take him down again. Ali gets posted to put him in trouble but he manages a drop toehold to send Theory into the buckle. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Ali is back up with a spinwheel kick.

Ali’s rolling neckbreaker drops Theory again but he’s fine enough to hit a springboard Spanish Fly for two of his own. Ali is able to knock him down again and heads up top, only to get crotched. A Town Down is countered into an STF but Theory makes the rope. The tornado DDT plants Theory again but the 450 misses, allowing Theory to chop block the already banged up knee. A Town Down retains the title at 10:19.

Rating: C+. I knew Ali was losing his big hometown title shot, you knew Ali was losing his big hometown title shot and the world knew Ali was losing his big hometown title shot. WWE isn’t going to give the fans that kind of feel good moment, especially when Ali has more punishment to receive. This was the biggest layup on the show and that is one of the things WWE might want to work on.

We recap Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins inside the Cell.

Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins

Inside the Cell and Cody has a torn pectoral muscle. Rollins cranks up the evil by coming out in Dusty Rhodes polka dots but Cody’s chest steals the show, because it looks AWFUL, making him seem all the nuttier for being out there. Cody starts firing off the left hands and manages a Disaster Kick, setting up a not so great Cody Cutter. The Figure Four goes on but Rollins manages to reach underneath the ring and grab a tool box. That doesn’t work so it’s a kendo stick to the bad arm to break things up.

Rollins stabs him in the chest with the stick and then knocks Cody into the Cell. Cody manages a whip of his own but can barely follow up. The steps off the shoulder rocks Cody again so Rollins puts on Cody’s jacket. He also grabs the weightlifting belt to beat on Rhodes before setting up the table. The fans chant THANK YOU ROLLINS as he steps on the bad arm in the corner. Cody can’t powerbomb him through the table but he can avoid the frog splash through the table, leaving Rollins down.

With nothing else working, Rhodes pulls out a bullrope with a cowbell so Rollins is confused. Rhodes ties one end around his wrist and Rollins does the same, giving us an impromptu bullrope match. Cody takes him down and hits a superkick, setting up the cowbell to the head for two. Rollins gets in another shot and unhooks the rope, allowing him to set up a table. A one armed Cross Rhodes gives Cody a quick two but the arm gives out on a powerbomb attempt.

Rollins cranks on the arm and toss powerbombs Cody through the table for two. It’s sledgehammer time but Cody kicks it away and hits a Pedigree for two of his own. Cody grabs the hammer but gets caught with the Stomp for two more. Another Stomp is countered into Cross Rhodes from Rollins but Cody pops up and hits one of his own for the double knockdown. They both go for the hammer but Cody switches to back to back Cross Rhodes. Now Rhodes picks up the hammer and hits a running shot for the pin at 24:18.

Rating: B+. That’s on a heck of a sliding scale as Cody was almost literally fighting with one arm. Having him win, especially before he goes off for surgery that might have him missing all the way through the Rumble, is quite the choice. It might be a feel good moment, but Rollins is going to need some time to recover from that kind of a loss. Cody looked like an absolute star and points for an amazing effort, but that arm was about as gruesome as you could get and it was hard to watch at times.

Overall Rating: B. Like many WWE pay per views, you don’t need to see much on the show, but it could have been worse. WWE continues to be a lot easier to watch when they don’t have the storyline nonsense eating away at your sanity and that was the case here. Most of the matches are ok to good, with the opener and main event being worth a look. This was the definition of a C level pay per view that did pretty well, but it had such a lame build on the way here that it was really hard to get excited for anything. Hopefully they can move on now, because these feuds are WAY past their expiration dates.

Results
Bianca Belair b. Asuka and Becky Lynch – Manhandle Slam to Asuka
Bobby Lashley b. Omos/MVP – Hurt Lock to MVP
Kevin Owens b. Ezekiel – Stunner
Judgment Day b. Finn Balor/AJ Styles/Liv Morgan – Spear to Balor
Madcap Moss b. Happy Corbin – Moss Pillmanized Corbin’s neck
Theory b. Mustafa Ali – A Town Down
Cody Rhodes b. Seth Rollins – Sledgehammer to the face

 

 

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Wrestlemania Backlash 2022: The Low Rent Canadian Stampede

Wrestlemania Backlash 2022
Date: May 8, 2022
Location: Dunkin Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

it’s time for a pay per view that feels like it has been little more than an obligation as the show is six matches long with a number of title matches. Granted in this case that number is one but take what you can get. The main event is a six man tag for reasons that I’m still not clear on but maybe the in-ring work can make up for it. Let’s get to it.

The opening sequence looks at Wrestlemania and how we got here.

We get a long recap video on Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins. Rhodes returned at Wrestlemania as a surprise opponent and beat Rollins, who isn’t happy about it. Now they are having a rematch with Rollins knowing what he is getting and both guys wanting to prove that they are better.

Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins

Cody starts fast by flipping out of a belly to back but the pop up uppercut is blocked. They take turns taking each other into the corner and Rollins rolls him up for two for a standoff. Cody is sent out to the apron for a knee out to the floor, where Rollins cuts him off with a clothesline. Back in and Cody fights out of a chinlock, setting up the Disaster Kick for two. Rollins knocks him out to the floor again and the crash puts Cody right back in trouble.

The chinlock goes on again but Cody fights up, only to get rolled up for two. Rollins heads up top, where Cody catches him with a delayed superplex for another big crash. They chop it out until the Cody Cutter gives Rhodes two but Rollins kicks him out of the air. They fight over a Pedigree attempt (that gets the fans’ attention) until Rollins grabs a Falcon Arrow for two. The Buckle Bomb into the frog splash gets two on Cody but he rolls away from the Phoenix splash.

A superkick (good one too) rocks Rollins, who is right there to catch him with the superplex but the Falcon Arrow is countered into Cross Rhodes, with Rollins’ foot landing in the rope on the cover. The moonsault misses and Rollins hits the Pedigree for two, leaving them both down. Rollins starts snapping off the Flip Flip And Fly, which Cody reverses into Cross Rhodes. Another is loaded up but Rollins snapmares out, only to have to flip out of a Vertebreaker. Rollins’ rollup with tights is reversed into a rollup with tights to give Cody the pin at 20:47.

Rating: B+. The Cody push continues as he gets another win over a former World Champion and proves that he belongs in the main event scene. These two have some very good chemistry together and I liked what we got here, even if the rest of the show might have some issues living up to this one. Heck of a match here, and Cody getting the title shot at Summerslam feels like a legitimate possibility.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

We recap Bobby Lashley vs. Omos. Lashley beat him at Wrestlemania, but now Omos has MVP in his corner as a guide to make him extra dangerous.

Bobby Lashley vs. Omos

MVP is here with Omos. Lashley slugs away to start and knocks Omos up against the ropes but an MVP distraction lets Omos get in a cheap shot. The slow beating continues as Lashley is knocked into the corner, allowing Omos the chance to make various noises. Lashley is knocked down again, allowing MVP to ask if Lashley is regretting his life choices yet.

A choke slows Omos down though and it’s Lashley tying him in the ropes and hammering away. With Omos tied up, Lashley goes after MVP but has to stop for the Downward Spiral on Omos. The Hurt Lock goes on but Lashley gets driven into the corner for the fast break. Lashley manages a spinebuster and loads up the spear, which is cut off with a knee. MVP gets in a cane shot and the chokebomb gives Omos the pin at 8:52.

Rating: C-. Unfortunately, this is about as good as it’s going to get between these two. You’re just not going to be able to get much out of Omos, who shouldn’t be doing much as far as moving around. This was the way it should have been and they made the match work about as well as expected. Omos had to win here and they even got the MVP interference in there too. Not a good match, but how it should have gone.

We recap Edge vs. AJ Styles. Edge beat him at Wrestlemania with help from Damian Priest, but Priest is barred from ringside. Styles also has a bad arm coming in.

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Styles starts fast and knocks him to the floor for some rams into a few things. A dropkick through the ropes doesn’t seem to connect but a camera cut saves them. AJ hits a moonsault to the floor but the Phenomenal Forearm is cut off with a big boot. Edge sends him into the post and steps a few times as the arm starts getting banged up again. Styles gets pulled down by the arm to set up an armbar to keep Edge in control.

Back up and AJ scores with a Pele but stereo crossbodies give us another double knockdown. A belly to back faceplant gives AJ two but Edge goes up, only to get hurricanranaed back down. The fireman’s carry backbreaker onto the knee gets two and the Calf Crusher goes on. Edge breaks that up with a ram into the mat, but AJ is smart enough to put it right back on. This time Edge goes to the rope for the actual break and loads up the spear, which hits a buckle that got exposed somewhere in there.

The second spear attempt connects but Styles is back up with the Styles Clash for two. The Phenomenal Forearm is loaded up so here is Damian Priest, who comes to the aisle but not to ringside, meaning he’s fine (even commentary calls that out as a lame technicality). Finn Balor comes in to take out Priest so Styles goes up….and we’ve got someone in a mask to pull him off the ropes. Edge grabs a crossface sleeper for the knockout win at 15:28.

Rating: B-. I don’t think there was any doubt that this was going to be pretty good, but it’s basically the exact same finish they had at Wrestlemania. Edge wins off some mysterious interference, likely setting up another match between these two in the Cell, as WWE manages to get a third match out of one idea. At least the mask reveal should be interesting, as they tend to be.

Post match the masked person gets in the ring, kneels to Edge, and unmasks as….Rhea Ripley. That’s not surprising and that isn’t a bad thing.

Video on Bianca Belair, who isn’t on the show but we need something to fill in the Peacock commercial time.

We recap Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey for Charlotte’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Charlotte beat her via some shenanigans at Wrestlemania so now it’s an I Quit match. Rousey continues to look rather bored with everything she does, but that has been the case since she got back.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey

Charlotte is defending in an I Quit match. Rousey knees her down to start and goes with the judo throws to stay on the arm. A clothesline gets Charlotte out of trouble but she has to escape Piper’s Pit. Charlotte hits a rather nasty German suplex (with the referee checking on Rousey) before they head outside. The trash talk lets Rousey get in a posting and she whips Charlotte into the timekeeper’s area. Charlotte is back out with a big boot and it’s kendo stick time, because OF COURSE WE HAVE A KENDO STICK.

Rousey takes it away so Charlotte runs off and comes back with two sticks. That’s fine with Rousey, who monkey flips her away and grabs both sticks in the process. The sticks are broken over Charlotte so she grabs a camera and throws it at Rousey’s head. With that missing because it would have wrecked Rousey, they fight into the crowd with Rousey being whipped into the hockey boards.

Charlotte ties her into a hand rail and puts on something like a camel clutch (how Sasha Banks beat Charlotte years ago). A chair shot is blocked through and they head back to ringside with Rousey taking over again. Another Piper’s Pit is broken up with a rake to the eyes and Rousey gets posted hard. Rousey manages to get in an armbar in the corner but they fall out to the floor to break it up.

After McAfee asks if that’s the Fiend in the front row (noticing some good cosplay), Charlotte comes back in with Natural Selection onto a chair for a No. The chair is set up with Charlotte saying this is her last chance and Happy Mother’s Day. The armbar in the chair goes on but Charlotte won’t quit. Rousey: “I was hoping you would say that b****.” The arm is cranked even harder and Charlotte quits at 16:23.

Rating: B. What mattered the most here was that this felt like a fight. It came off like two women who wanted to hurt each other and had a brawl (kendo sticks aside). The ending was about Rousey going into full gear to put Charlotte away because she was so angry. I’m not sure what is next for Rousey, but she absolutely had to win this one.

Money in the Bank is coming, complete with Cody Rhodes in the empty Allegiant Stadium, talking about the show. They’re making him one of the faces of the show.

We recap Madcap Moss vs. Happy Corbin. After losing to Drew McIntyre at Wrestlemania, Corbin blamed Moss, which split up the team. Then Corbin stole Moss’ Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal trophy and the match was set to prove themselves.

Madcap Moss vs. Happy Corbin

They start fast with Moss hammering away and yelling about jokes. A hiptoss drops Corbin again but he sends Moss out to the apron. Back in and Corbin hits a chokeslam before they head outside with Moss being rammed into the barricade. The chinlock goes on back inside before Corbin hits a flipping slam. A backsplash of all things (commentary is surprised at that one) gets two but Moss is back up for a nice looking fall away slam.

The Punchline is broken up and countered into a belly to back slam for two. Deep Six gets two more so Corbin does the slide underneath the ropes for the clothesline. Moss ducks and grabs a sunset flip for the pin at 9:42. I don’t remember the last time I saw someone win clean with such a basic move out of nowhere like that.

Rating: C-. This was the match that they put out there for the sake of filling in time between the big matches and it felt like it. Moss vs. Corbin isn’t an interesting feud and it wasn’t going to be well received as a pay per view match. What we got was a passable brawl but the fans weren’t having it. I did like the sudden finish though as that is something you do not see nearly often enough these days.

Video on Drew McIntyre.

Charlotte has a broken radius and is out of action for the time being.

We recap RKBro/Drew McIntyre vs. the Bloodline. The original match was RKBro vs. Usos to unify the Tag Team Titles but then McIntyre and Roman Reigns got involved to make it a six man tag, which is far more interesting. Allegedly.

RKBro/Drew McIntyre vs. Bloodline

Paul Heyman is here with the Bloodline and Orton starts with Jimmy. Riddle comes in for the assisted Floating Bro but Jimmy sends him into the corner to take over. McIntyre comes in and tosses Jimmy into the corner, allowing him to do the dramatic point at Reigns. After thinking about it for a bit, Reigns accepts the tag and then hands it off to Jey (sending McAfee into a fit of laughter).

It’s back to Riddle, who gets taken into the corner as the Usos start the beating. With Riddle down, NOW Reigns is willing to come in and the slow beating is on before it’s back to Jimmy. Orton gets superkicked off the apron so Riddle is a bit more alone. Riddle finally gets in a shot to the face though and the Usos are knocked down, allowing the double tag to McIntyre and Reigns, the latter of whom realizes he screwed up by having no one to tag.

McIntyre wins the slugout and hits a belly to belly, setting up the jumping neckbreaker. The Usos come in for a distraction though and it’s Reigns knocking McIntyre down. Reigns stops to pose with the titles and it’s McIntyre coming in with a Claymore. The hot tag brings in Orton to clean house with RKO’s, meaning Jey needs to save Jimmy. Jey superkicks McIntyre to cut off the Claymore and drags Jimmy over to the corner in a smart move. The double tag brings in Jey and Riddle, with the ladder striking away to put Jey in trouble.

The Floating Bro gets two on Jey, who is right back with a pop up neckbreaker for the same. Everything breaks down and McIntyre loads up the announcers’ table, only to get release Rock Bottomed through it by Reigns. Riddle takes out Jimmy and Reigns but Jey is there with a suicide dive. Back in and Jey and Riddle kick each other down, earning a nice bit of applause. Jey goes up top but gets pulled down with a super RKO, only to have Reigns spear Riddle for the pin at 22:25.

Rating: B+. That would have been a hot fire house show main event and it was a very entertaining match. Then you get to the problem: there is a grand total of nothing to get out of it once the bell rings. Reigns has no challenger set up, the Bloodline wins, there is no Tag Team Title match scheduled for either team, and nothing was set up going forward. That being said, I’ll take a very good main event like this any time, as you had all six of them working hard and the fans were all the way in.

Overall Rating: B+. This was actually a heck of a show, assuming you don’t want it to mean anything going forward (save for Rousey winning the title). It was a bunch of good matches, with the two weakest being watchable, and a hot main event. There was nothing horrible on the card and the fans were into a lot of things on here, so we’ll call this a low rent version of Canadian Stampede (no, it isn’t that good) in what shouldn’t be a surprise. As usual, when WWE gets away from the goofy, the in-ring product is strong and they had another solid three hour show here. Just don’t expect it to mean anything and you’ll be fine.

Results
Cody Rhodes b. Seth Rollins – Rollup with tights
Omos b. Bobby Lashley – Chokebomb
Edge b. AJ Styles – Crossface sleeper
Ronda Rousey b. Charlotte – Armbar
Madcap Moss b. Happy Corbin – Sunset flip
Bloodline b. RKBro/Drew McIntyre – Spear to Riddle

 

 

 

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Cyber Sunday 2007: The Very Gimmick Show

Cyber Sunday 2007
Date: October 28, 2007
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Attendance: 10,094
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Joey Styles

This show can’t come fast enough, as the build hasn’t exactly been great. The good thing is there are enough interesting matches on the show and some of the stipulations could work out. The voting is enough of a hook to make the show, which includes Randy Orton defending the Raw World Title against someone and Batista vs. Undertaker with a referee to be determined, work. Let’s get to it.

The opening video has an election theme, as the wrestlers have been trying to gain the fans’ votes. Giving the fans a direct say is always a good idea.

Rey Mysterio vs. Finlay

Stretcher Match – 40%
No Disqualification Match – 36%
Shillelagh On A Pole Match – 24%

There is a stretcher at ringside and you have to put your opponent on it and move over a line. Finlay starts fast by getting Rey into the corner and sending him shoulder first into the post. A toss sends Rey under the ropes and onto the stretcher before Finlay drops him ribs first onto it again. It’s way too early to send Rey over the line though so he heads back inside for a change.

A headscissors takes Finlay down and a basement dropkick staggers him again, meaning it’s time to go outside again. Finlay fights off of the stretcher though and kicks Rey in the chest…before going up the pole that has the Shillelagh in case the other stipulation was picked. Rey powerbombs him out of the corner and grabs the Shillelagh himself but Finlay takes it away and starts going after Rey’s knee.

Finlay rams the stretcher into Rey, who manages a 619 on the apron to send Finlay onto the stretcher. A splash is almost enough to get him over the line but the stretcher gets caught on a TV cord. With that out of the way, a flapjack onto the stretcher is enough to give Rey the win.

Rating: C+. The stretcher was a bit of a weird way to go but it was a unique enough of a way to go. These two have had a nice feud over the last few weeks and Mysterio gets a win to keep him in the thing. Finlay continues to be a perfectly solid midcard villain and he should be able to keep things going for a pretty long while to come.

Matt Hardy vs. MVP is off the card because Matt busted his head WAY open on Smackdown. He looks like he was in a car crash as MVP comes in to offer condolences. Matt says that MVP gets to face someone the fans pick for the US Title, with the options being Mark Henry, Great Khali or Kane. MVP’s panicked face is great as he’s off to talk to Vickie Guerrero about this.

JBL begs fans to vote for him to referee the main event.

We see the Divas in their Halloween costumes, including

Maria (cat)
Victoria (sumo wrestler, with Kenny Dykstra as Mr. Fuji, setting up the Ron Simmons cameo)

More on this later I’m assuming.

ECW World Title: CM Punk vs. ???

The Miz – 39%
John Morrison – 33%
Big Daddy V – 28%

That’s about as expected, as ECW had been pushing Miz as the challenger and he’s a fresh match. Punk takes him down with a front facelock to start before taking him down into a headlock. Miz reverses into a headscissors and they get up to their feet for a slugout. There’s a slingshot suplex to give Punk two but Miz gets in a few shots of his own. Punk catches him on top, only to get pulled down for a crash.

The running corner clothesline gets two and Miz grabs a cravate. The fans tell Miz that he can’t wrestle and Punk comes back with a suplex for two. Miz is right back with a neck snap across the top and we hit the chinlock. With that not working, Miz goes up but Punk runs the corner for a super armdrag. The springboard clothesline gives Punk two and, after avoiding a running knee, he hits the GTS to retain the title.

Rating: C. I like Miz getting the shot but this was a TV match and nothing more. Miz isn’t ready to take the title but it is a nice way for him to get his feet wet on a higher stage. He has done well so far and getting a pay per view title match of his own shows you what he might be capable of doing. Punk needs some bigger challengers soon though, and this was another stop gap.

More costumes!

Mickie James (Native American)
Torrie Wilson (Washington football player)

We recap the Raw World Title situation. Randy Orton is the champion but needs a challenger. The options include Jeff Hardy, Mr. Kennedy and Shawn Michaels and here are the results:

Shawn Michaels – 59%
Jeff Hardy – 31%
Mr. Kennedy – 10%

Therefore, we need a bonus match.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with Kennedy driving him into the corner but Hardy walks the corner with a headlock takeover. That’s reversed into one from Kennedy but Hardy sends him outside and hits the big dive off the top. Back in and Hardy rains down right hands in the corner but Kennedy knocks him outside. A running boot to the head gets two on Hardy on the way back in and we hit the neck crank.

There’s a DDT for two on Hardy and we hit the chinlock. With that let go, Kennedy goes up top but gets super hurricanranaed back down. Jeff hits a heck of a clothesline into the Sling Blade for two. The Whisper in the Wind gets the same but the slingshot kick in the corner misses and Kennedy steals the pin.

Rating: C+. That was a rather weird ending as Kennedy pinned him clean off the miss and Hardy wasn’t even close to kickout out. If they were working a fake injury there, Hardy sold it very well as he looked a bit stunned when he hit the mat. The match felt like it could have been on any given Raw, though it worked out pretty well as a bonus match, odd ending aside.

Michael Cole votes for Kane to face MVP.

More Halloween costumes, with Michelle McCool as Eve from the Garden of Eden and Melina as a Las Vegas showgirl.

Mick Foley is in the back to talk about possibly being the guest referee tonight but JBL cuts him off. JBL goes on a rant about how Foley is just here to sell some book so we see a very pro-JBL/anti-Austin/Foley campaign style video. After the video, Foley says it’s interesting that he is between Fatheads (big wall decorations) of Batista and Undertaker when JBL is the biggest fathead around. Foley has been a referee before and he can do it again.

US Title: MVP vs. ???

Kane – 67%
Great Khali – 24%
Mark Henry – 9%

Kane is challenging and that is a pretty definitive pick. MVP bails to the floor to start and asks for an early time out. Back in and MVP slugs away but gets dropped with a single shot to the face. A big boot into the side slam gives Kane two but MVP goes after Kane’s bad ribs to take over.

Some stomping to the ribs set up the running boot in the corner for two and we hit the abdominal stretch on the mat. Kane fights up and goes after MVP’s ribs for a change, including standing on them in the corner. A backbreaker sets up a quickly released abdominal stretch on MVP before Kane bends the ribs around the post. That’s enough for MVP who takes the countout to retain.

Rating: C-. Speaking of TV matches, they didn’t even have a good one here, as Kane mauled him for the most part and then won via countout, likely setting up a rematch. This was also rather short, with the two of them not having time to get very far. MVP escapes to continue holding both titles though and that is the right way to go in the long term.

SAVE US!

Back to the Halloween costumes, with Layla as a cop and Kelly Kelly as a gangsta (her term).

Randy Orton says be careful what you wish for. He sends us to a recap video of the bad things he has done to Shawn Michaels, including putting him on the shelf.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Orton is defending and we get started after some fairly lengthy referee’s directions. Shawn starts fast with a knee to the ribs and some chops to send Orton to the floor. That means a slingshot flip dive to drop Orton again and they head back inside to slug it out. Orton takes him down and grabs a front facelock but gets sent shoulder first into the post to break that up.

That means it’s time to start going after Orton’s arm, including a short armscissors. With that broken up, Shawn goes to the headlock with the arm trapped but Orton fights up and drops him onto the barricade. Back in and Orton hits the dropkick, setting up the rear naked choke.

With that broken up, Michaels reverses a belly to back suplex into a crossbody for two. The backbreaker gives Orton two more though and Shawn is down again. The superplex is broken up with some right hands and Shawn…misses the top rope elbow. Since it’s Shawn, he chops his way out of trouble and hits the running forearm into the nip up. Now the top rope elbow can connect but Shawn’s superkick is cut off by a low blow for the DQ

Rating: B-. While a better match, this was rather similar to MVP vs. Kane, as it felt designed to set up something else down the line. Orton wasn’t about to lose the title so soon but they also didn’t want to have Shawn lost on his first pay per view match back. That left this as about the only choice and it came off well, as the two of them are talented enough to make anything work in any situation.

Post match Orton loads up the Punk but Shawn is back up with the superkick to leave Orton laying (after a great sell as he staggers a bit and then collapses).

Back to the costumes, with Brooke as a jungle girl and Jillian Hall as Brittney Spears.

We recap HHH vs. Umaga, with Umaga serving as HHH has been mocking Vince McMahon over being Hornswoggle’s father. Therefore it is time for some violence, with the fans getting to pick the stipulation. This time though, there are three viable options and it could go any way.

HHH vs. Umaga

Street Fight – 57%
Steel Cage – 26%
First Blood – 17%

I’m a bit surprised it’s that one sided. HHH goes straight for him in the aisle and they fight on the keyboard set. The Samoan drop is escaped so HHH spears him through part of the set. They fight into the crowd with HHH being knocked down the steps but being able to backdrop Umaga over the barricade.

Some right hands inside stagger Umaga and a trashcan shot to the head gives HHH two. Now the Samoan drop can connect and Umaga starts in on the ribs. It’s back to the floor with HHH being sent into the steps, setting up the bearhug back inside. With that not working, Umaga hits the running hip attack in the corner for two so the referee gets scared out to the floor.

Umaga grabs a chair but HHH uses it to hit him low. A DDT onto the chair gives HHH two but Umaga plants him with the swinging Rock Bottom. Umaga starts loading up a bunch of announcers’ tables but HHH knocks him over them to get the brawling going again. That means HHH is laid out on the table for a running splash from one table and through another. The top rope splash misses back inside though and HHH grabs the sledgehammer. After ducking the Samoan Spike, the sledgehammer to the head sets up the Pedigree to finish Umaga.

Rating: B. Match of the night here so far, as HHH got to slay the dragon, albeit after the dragon put up a heck of a fight. That is where Umaga plays a rather important role, as he is able to do this against almost anyone. The fact that he is in there against HHH makes it better, as he certainly knows how to do this kind of thing. Odds are they probably did this at a few dozen house shows so they had the practice down too. Good fight.

Halloween costume results! JR: “Let’s just cancel the whole thing.”

Mickie James – 21%
Kelly Kelly – 17%
Torrie Wilson – 15%
Melina – 12%
Maria – 12%
Layla – 7%
Jillian Hall – 5%
Victoria – 4%
Brooke – 4%
Michelle McCool – 3%

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker, which is one of the bigger and better feuds in recent years. They have gone back and forth over a good chunk of the year (without Batista actually being able to beat him) and now it is time for their latest round. That means it’s time for a special guest referee….but first we need to hear about 13 million people voting. We also need to hear from JBL, who knows everyone has voted for him. Cue Mick Foley for the results:

Steve Austin – 79%
Mick Foley – 11%
John Bradshaw Layfield – 10%

JBL and Foley get in a brawl but here’s Austin too. JBL beats Austin down in the corner but the Clothesline From JBL is cut off with the Stunner and does his posing so we can get it out of the fans’ systems.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging and Steve Austin is guest referee. Batista misses the spear at the bell so he tries a headlock, which is broken up in a hurry. Another headlock is countered into a big boot to give Undertaker two and he sends Batista’s arm into the buckle. Batista fights back and hits a few shoulders to the ribs in the corner. That’s broken up and Undertaker grabs a triangle choke before taking him to the apron for the big boot to the side of the head.

The arm is wrapped around the top rope again but Undertaker misses a running big boot to put him down again. They head outside with Undertaker being sent into various hard objects, only to come back with his jumping clothesline. Old School is broken up and Undertaker misses another running boot in the corner, sending him crashing to the floor. Back in and Undertaker drops onto Undertaker’s back a few times for two and they’re already on the outside again.

The apron legdrop has Batista in more trouble and Snake Eyes makes it worse. The big boot is cut off with Batista’s big clothesline for two as this is all high impact so far. Undertaker drives him into the corner to break up the Batista Bomb though and the bad arm is sent into the post. Batista manages a spinebuster for a delayed two but Undertaker pulls him into the triangle choke.

In a smart move, Batista stacks him up for two and Undertaker has to let go. The chokeslam gives Undertaker two but the Tombstone is escaped, allowing Batista to hit a spear for two of his own. Batista hammers away but gets caught in the Last Ride for another close two. Another spinebuster gives Batista another two..,and Undertaker sits up, scaring the heck out of Batista. The Batista Bomb is only good for two and Batista is shocked all over again. One more Batista Bomb finally puts Undertaker away to retain the title.

Rating: B. This is another one of those pairings that is going to work no matter what. Batista finally gets to beat Undertaker and that is what he needed to do at some point, especially if they are going to fight again someday. They followed their standard formula here of letting both guys beat each other up for a long time and it still works. Austin was a complete non-factor here, which was rather nice for a change.

Overall Rating: B+. Despite a not great build with the campaigning stuff, this was a pretty sweet show with one good match after another. There might not be a classic on the card but having a string of pay per view quality stuff mixed in with some solid TV level matches made for a good three hours. They got this right, though it is something that could only work once a year or so.

 

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night Two: Leftovers Aren’t Very Good

Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night Two
Date: April 3, 2022
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 78,453
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith
America The Beautiful: Jesse James Decker

We’re back for night two and that means the other half of the card gets their chance (plus one match from the original night because of timing issues). The main event is the latest biggest match ever as Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar have their unification match to make one World Title for all of…eh maybe they make it to Summerslam. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

Note that I was in attendance for this show, sitting in the third level off the floor in the end zone corner with the stage on my right.

Jesse Jane Decker sings America the Beautiful.

We get a recap from last night.

Mark Wahlberg narrates the opening video, but unlike last year it’s a fresh one for the second night. Wahlberg talks about how it is tough to do it again so we’re running Wrestlemania back. He hypes up the main event to wrap it up. Again, just having a star do this makes it feel more important.

Here is HHH for a surprise appearance to get things going. After taking a long time to soak it all in (fair) and hugging his daughters in the front row (also fair), he puts his boots in the middle of the ring to confirm his. He does have one thing for us though: WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA! More daughter hugging ensues.

Gable Steveson is presented to the crowd. Again.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits

RKBro is defending and these teams have been fighting back and forth for weeks. The champs also have what sounds like a mash up of their themes and that isn’t the best idea. Ford, Riddle and Gable start things off, with the latter giving us some SHUSHING. That doesn’t go well for Riddle, who knocks Gable outside and rolls Ford up for an early two. Ford is back with a running clothesline to drop Riddle but Gable is back in to go after Ford as well.

Everything breaks down and Otis clears the ring without much trouble. The six way staredown leads to three brawls at once but quickly settles down to Ford vs. Gable. That works for Ford, who hits a HUGE running flip dive over the top onto the pile. Gable adds a moonsault onto the same pile and everyone is down on the floor. Back in and Otis runs Riddle over before hitting a splash for no cover, which doesn’t seem to be the best idea. Instead Otis knocks Riddle into the corner and brings Gable back in for two off a northern lights suplex.

Ford comes in with a dropkick to Gable, who monkey flips him over and onto Ford’s own face for two. It’s off to Dawkins to clean house and cover Riddle for two, with Otis hitting a splash to break it up. Riddle knees his way out of an ankle lock and gives Dawkins a Bro To Sleep (that’ll get some reactions), allowing the hot tag off to Orton. Everything breaks down and Orton drops Gable and Dawkins onto the announcers’ table.

Back in and RKBro hits stereo hanging DDTs onto the Profits but the Academy makes stereo saves. The Academy hits a Steiner Bulldog for two on Ford but Otis’ Vader Bomb is broken up. The Profits get Gable up for a Doomsday Blockbuster and another near fall as the fans declare this awesome. Orton can’t RKO Dawkins, who gives him the Sky High. Ford goes up for the frog splash but Riddle springboards in with the RKO to pull him back down. Orton pulls Gable out of the air with another RKO for the pin to retain the titles at 11:30.

Rating: B-. This was a great choice for an opener as the fans love RKBro and the action made it a very entertaining match. It also didn’t overstay its welcome and got out after getting its stuff in. RKBro retaining works here, but that split is coming and it is going to be a heck of a hot feud if they do it right.

Post match the Profits offer RKBro some yum yum juice, but hold on as Gable Steveson is invited in too. Chad doesn’t like that and cuts them off, slapping the cup from Steveson’s hand. That’s too far for everyone else, so Chad is left alone with Steveson. The belly to belly suplex sends Chad flying and drinking ensues. Steveson had to start somewhere.

Remember last night? It happened.

Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

Omos issued a challenge and Lashley accepted it. Lashley’s kick to the ribs is easily blocked and Omos forearms him down without much trouble. Lashley fights back and tries a suplex, which doesn’t work either. A head vice is broken up so Omos forearms Lashley down again. Some running splashes in the corner connect but Omos misses another one, allowing Lashley to try a failed Hurt Lock attempt.

Omos gives him a gorilla press drop and tells Lashley to get up so the bearhug can go on. A drive into the corner sets up another bearhug but Lashley slugs his way out. More slugging sets up a suplex to drop Omos and a spear to the back does it again. The regular spear finishes for Lashley at 6:32.

Rating: D+. I’m sorry what now? You build Omos up as this unstoppable force and then just have him lose clean in a six and a half minute match? Lashley getting a big win is nice to see and he’s probably in the title picture already, but Omos losing is going to take away just about everything he had. He’ll be around, probably as a bodyguard again, but if they want him as a singles guy (which they might not), this was bizarre. It wasn’t a very good match either, as Omos did a bunch of basic power guy stuff which is hardly interesting.

WWE does charity stuff.

We recap Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn. Knoxville decided he wanted to wrestle but Zayn didn’t like it. This set off a way of pranks/general annoyances, including Zayn eliminating Knoxville from the Royal Rumble and Knoxville putting Zayn’s phone number on a banner in Los Angeles. A match must ensue.

Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn

Anything goes and some of Knoxville’s Jackass friends are in the front row (popular place to be tonight). Zayn wastes no time in hitting the Helluva Kick and knocking Knoxville to the floor where more stomping can ensue. That isn’t enough as Zayn goes after the Jackass crew, allowing Knoxville to spray him with a fire extinguisher. Knoxville busts out some of the weapons but Zayn hits him in the back with the cookie sheet.

A crutch shot does it again and Zayn throws a trashcan at him for two, allowing commentary to get in some Sanford And Sons references. It’s table time…but this one has mousetraps all over it, because of course it does. That takes too long though and Knoxville is back with some trashcan lids to the head. A regular table is loaded up in the corner but Zayn suplexes him through it for two.

The Helluva Kick is cut off by a blast from an air horn, allowing….some other Jackass guy (Party Boy Pawnius?) to come in and take his clothes off. Zayn knocks him outside and kicks him underneath the ring, only to have Wee Man (he’s small) come out and beat Zayn up. Wee Man kicks away at Zayn and hits a slam, setting up a tornado DDT from Knoxville for two. It’s time to bring out something that appears to be a way to launch a boot for automatic low blows, meaning Zayn fights out to break it up.

Zayn goes up but Knoxville pulls out a remote to make pyro go out, causing Zayn to crotch himself. Knoxville grabs a bowling ball to crush Zayn low in the corner and now its taser time. Zayn runs…right into a giant hand which slaps him down. That’s too much for Zayn as he drops Knoxville and goes up, only to get crotched and thrown through the mousetrap table. Back in and Knoxville busts out….a giant mousetrap. Zayn is tased onto it and, after some effort, Knoxville gets it to go off and crush Zayn for the pin at 14:25 (ignore Zayn’s shoulders being on the trap rather than the mat).

Rating: C+. This is going to be a weird one. You know what this felt like? Home Alone as a wrestling match. Zayn was trying to do something but Knoxville busted out so many elaborate traps and pranks (read as violence) to stop him at every turn. Of course Knoxville’s friends were here as they should have been in a situation like this, but it’s much more a big stunt show than a match.

It’s also a good case of something not being for me but having an impact. The stadium was ROCKING during this match and the energy was very high. I don’t watch Jackass and the concept is REALLY not something I care for but the reaction was there and that is why these guys were brought in. Whether it made business sense is hard to tell, but a lot of the fans loved this and that is enough to carry it beyond….whatever it was.

Remember Drew McIntyre beating Happy Corbin and cutting the ropes up with his sword? It happened last night.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Naomi/Sasha Banks vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina

Carmella/Zelina are defending and Naomi/Banks come out in a VERY expensive looking car. Ripley/Morgan have a Batman or Catwoman theme going to at least have something in common. Corey wastes no time in praising Carmella, who is in part of a wedding dress for her entrance gear.

Carmella masks up so Ripley wants to face her. That brings Carmella in but she hands it off to Banks, who actually tries a test of strength with Ripley. With that not working, Banks tries a Backstabber, which falls apart too. Everything breaks down and some dives leave us with Banks vs. Morgan. A Codebreaker staggers Banks and Oblivion drops her but Natalya tags herself in for a save. Baszler comes in to stomp on Morgan’s ankle until an enziguri breaks it up.

Carmella tags herself in as well and everything breaks down and it’s time for the parade of finishers. Ripley’s superbomb is countered into a hurricanrana from Carmella and we get stereo Towers of Doom out of the corners, leaving everyone down again. Back up and Morgan knocks Naomi into Riptide for two with a save being made.

Baszler’s running knee to Naomi’s face gets two with Morgan making the save this time. Carmella superkicks Baszler and Naomi for two each, meaning screaming ensues. Back up and Naomi kicks Carmella in the face, setting up Banks’ frog splash for two. Banks hits a Meteora to drop Zelina on the floor and Naomi elevates Carmella for a Codebreaker from Banks for the pin and the titles at 10:48.

Rating: D+. This was all over the place and as usual, there is no reason to care about these teams. They were thrown together and given next to no story other than “we want the titles too”. I was having trouble remembering who was on what team as they might as well have drawn names from a hat. In other words, it’s a WWE Women’s Tag Team Title match.

Remember Miz and Logan Paul beating the Mysterios and then splitting up after? It happened last night.

Some Dallas Cowboys are here to a mixed reaction.

We recap Edge vs. AJ Styles. Edge wanted someone to step up so Styles did, with Edge saying he wanted the bulldog version of Styles. Then Edge went nuts and beat down Styles with a Conchairto, putting Styles out of action for a few weeks. Now Styles is back for revenge.

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Styles comes to the ring with a pretty nasty cut on the side of his face that has commentary (and me) confused. Edge appears on an elevated throne sitting on a slightly burning platform, which is at least a cool visual (though I thought it was a statue in the stadium). Styles backs him into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. The drop down into the dropkick sets up some armdrags to put Edge in trouble and some kicks to the leg make it worse.

We settle down a bit with some staring before Edge gets sent to the floor. That lets Styles hit a sliding knee but the springboard 450 only hits knees back inside. Edge starts going after the ribs as the pace slows down a lot. The abdominal stretch is broken up but Edge takes him down with a shoulder breaker to change up the pace. Styles hits a right hand but seems to have to stop and pop his shoulder back in. A suplex sends Edge hard into the corner and they’re both down again.

Edge grabs a double arm crank but has to avoid the Styles Clash. That works out well enough for him though as it’s off to an STF to put Styles in more trouble, though he’s straight over to the rope. A slingshot DDT plants Edge for two, though he’s fine enough to catch Styles on top. Styles slips out and gets a torture rack, which he swings over into a powerbomb for two more. Back up and Styles snaps off a German suplex and they’re both down again.

Styles wins the slugout and adds a Pele kick, setting up the Calf Crusher. Edge reverses that into the Crossface so Styles gets to the ropes again. A slingshot Batista Bomb gives Edge two so they both go up top. This time Styles superplexes him down onto the apron, because WE MUST HAVE AN APRON SPOT.

Now the springboard 450 connects on Edge’s back for a delayed two and they need a breather. Back up and Edge misses the spear, setting up the Styles Clash for two more. With nothing else working, the Phenomenal Forearm is loaded up….and here is Damian Priest for a distraction. Styles tries the Forearm but gets speared out of the air to give Edge the pin at 24:32.

Rating: B-. The action was good, but there were so many delays between that action that it was hard to build anything up. It felt like a main event level match and Styles was hardly crushed, but the Saturday version was much better with Seth Rollins and Cody Rhodes doing a similar match. This was by no means bad, but it needed to be about eight minutes shorter to cut out a lot of the down time between moves.

Post match Edge and Priest stare at each other, pose and then leave together.

Tonight’s attendance is 78,453, though the announcer says 77,453. Get it together people.

Sheamus/Ridge Holland vs. New Day

Butch is here with the villains. We see the Big E. injury during the entrances, which isn’t something that should be aired that often (by which I mean ever). In a great touch, New Day wears Big E. style singlets, even in the colors Big E. was wearing when he won the WWE Title. Sheamus and Holland jump them during the entrances and rip off the coats, leaving Butch to throw them around.

Trouble in Paradise hits Holland for two at the bell but Sheamus makes the save. Sheamus has to keep Butch from going nuts though, leaving Woods to drop Holland. The Brogue Kick drops Kingston and Butch distracts the referee so Sheamus can Brogue Woods as well. Holland’s Northern Grit finishes woods at 1:39. So Holland (unintentionally) injures Big E. and then gets the pin here, as Butch is now some near feral boy? Right.

Post match Butch has to be pulled off of Woods again, because Pete Dunne is now a crazy man who needs supervision.

Remember when Cody Rhodes returned and beat Seth Rollins? It happened last night.

We honor the Hall of Fame inductees again…including the Undertaker coming out to wave to the crowd. This is the same thing he did last night and here it is again. On a show that is going to be about eight hours combined over two nights, this gets five minutes.

You can bet on the main event!

You can buy Undertaker gear!

You can watch Yellowstone on Peacock!

Long recap of Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory, which was set up when Vince McMahon told McAfee he could have a match. Then Theory started messing with McAfee, who got serious. For some reason, this required Theory to beat both the United States and Intercontinental Champion but show no interest in winning either title. We do get some very cool clips of McAfee training before he came to WWE, just because he wanted to. That’s some serious dedication, and a Rip Rogers cameo always helps.

Austin Theory vs. Pat McAfee

Vince McMahon comes out to introduce Theory, his new….protege? I guess? McAfee on the other hand gets an introduction from the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders and even punts a football into the crowd during his entrance. McAfee punches him down to start but Theory comes out of the corner with a shot to the throat. A jumping elbow out of the corner and a hurricanrana get McAfee out of trouble as Vince isn’t pleased at ringside.

Theory is back with a snap suplex and then he does it again for a bonus. The third attempt is blocked though and McAfee hits one of his own. They go outside where McAfee does the Rock’s commentary on his own match bit, including a mention of his parents. Back in and McAfee takes WAY too long setting up a Swanton and crashes down hard.

Theory goes up top but McAfee cuts him off and tries a superplex. That’s broken up so McAfee backflips off the top and lands on his feet, only to jump back to the top for the superplex (dang) and a near fall as Cole is WAY behind McAfee here. The Punt misses though and Theory knocks him down again. Theory loads up the ATL…and gets reversed into a rollup to give McAfee the pin at 9:37.

Rating: C+. That’s on quite the sliding scale as McAfee is in his third WWE match and hasn’t been in the ring in well over a year. I know Theory is going to be fine and it’s a special situation, but this doesn’t exactly make him pinning Finn Balor and Ricochet look very worthwhile. Again though, the fans were WAY into this and that’s all that matters in this case. Not a great match, but McAfee has put in the work and looked competent out there.

Post match Vince glares at Theory and looks up at McAfee….who challenges McMahon for a fight right now. Vince takes off the jacket and shirt, revealing his signature wrestling look (which matches McAfee). Cole is panicking as Vince gets in the ring but then gets even worse when a referee shows up.

Vince McMahon vs. Pat McAfee

Austin Theory jumps McAfee from behind to start so McMahon hits some clotheslines. McAfee gets fired up though and stares at Vince…until Austin pulls him down and crotches him against the post. Theory isn’t done though as he throws Vince a football. Vince teases punting it into the crowd before punting it into McAfee’s ribs (that didn’t really work, though I don’t think it was supposed to be anything more than a final insult) for the pin at 3:42.

Rating: D+. This was barely a match (Vince wasn’t touched) and I thought about not even rating it. McAfee gets cheated out of the win but much like last night in the main event, the point of this is having him in the same ring as a legend like McMahon. This is probably going to be (and should be) Vince’s last match ever so there is definitely some awesome historical significance, but it was just Vince hitting some clotheslines and taunting. That being said, WHY DID THEY NOT ANNOUNCE THIS IN ADVANCE??? At least Austin made it clear that a fight was coming, but Vince wasn’t even listed in Theory’s corner.

Post match Theory gets to pose and we have the big hug. Theory’s music starts and Vince panics, which is a warmup for CUE GLASS SHATTER as Steve Austin is here (as you might have guessed). Theory goes after him and gets punched into the corner to set up the Stunner. That leaves Austin alone with Vince, meaning it’s time to get scared. Beer is offered though and Vince accepts, despite looking terrified.

They drink together until Austin tries the Stunner, which goes horribly, horribly wrong. Vince basically falls down and then into the ropes, bounces back, and then goes down first, leaving Austin to land on Vince’s legs. Look this up, as it was so bad that I was unable to speak from laughter. Austin has some beers with McAfee, who gets Stunned as well. The big beer bash is on, with McAfee being shown sneaking in a drink while down on the floor. This was one more farewell for Austin, though it’s a good thing the timekeeper had that much beer around.

Remember when Bianca Belair beat Becky Lynch to win the Raw Women’s Title in a pretty great match? It happened last night.

Wrestlemania XXXIX is in Los Angeles.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar in the World Title unification match. They have been fighting for months (this time, as it’s really more like years) and now it is decided that there can only be one World Champion. Reigns and the Usos laid Lesnar out in Madison Square Garden to make this even more serious/personal. What better place than right here?

Universal Title/WWE Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Winner take all and Reigns has Paul Heyman with him for a very long entrance. Reigns also gets to tell Wrestlemania to acknowledge him so we can get in another catchphrase before we actually start. Hold on again as we need Big Match intros, with Heyman and Lesnar taking care of the work.

Lesnar hammers away to start and drives Reigns into the corner for some shoulders to ribs. Three overhead belly to belly suplexes have Reigns in more trouble and they head outside. That means Heyman has to panic (Heyman: “I love you! It was all Reigns’ idea!”), which is enough of a distraction for Reigns to sear Lent through the barricade (as tends to happen a lot). Back in and Reigns hits the spear for two, followed by the Superman Punch.

That’s too far for Lesnar, who starts rolling the released German suplexes. Lesnar is holding his ribs, but keeps coming back because this is serious. Another German suplex is countered into another Superman Punch and Lesnar is rocked again. Reigns tries another spear but gets reversed into the F5 for two more.

Another F5 is countered with a rake to the eyes and Reigns knocks Lesnar into the referee. A low blow and belt shot cut Lesnar down for two and frustration is setting in. The spear hits Lesnar in the back so Reigns tries it again, only to get pulled into the Kimura. The rope (which is shoved forward by Heyman) is grabbed for the break but they’re both down. Reigns says it’s out, meaning his shoulder, but comes back with a spear for the pin and the unified titles at 12:14.

Rating: C+. This was a slightly extended version of the stereotypical match that these guys have. You had an exchange of finishers and then someone won, which might be a bit exciting but has been done to death in recent years. Reigns winning was hardly a surprise, but it would have been nicer to see it come in a match with some more drama or intrigue instead of the same formula Lesnar has used for so long.

Reigns poses with Heyman and the titles as Lesnar glares at them to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It wasn’t a disaster like last year’s night two, but this was just ok for the most part. The biggest flaw should be obvious: the amount of time that this show spends on recaps or ANYTHING but getting to the matches advertised. I don’t need to see the matches from last night in fairly long recaps, as I was there to see the show live. Contrary to what WWE thinks, it might be a good idea to cut some things out, but that might not let them fill in so much time that they can brag about later.

As for the wrestling itself, nothing really stands out. There are some good matches, but nothing that is really worth going out of your way to see (your individual mousetrap enjoyment may vary). The show felt like such a rehash of last night, with Austin and Undertaker getting that much time each. It isn’t terrible, but I had fun with the first night and this felt like a followup that you didn’t need to watch.

Overall Overall Rating: B-. Overall, the lesson here continues to be simple: Wrestlemania does not need to be a two night event as WWE does not have the amount of content necessary to make it work. There is SO MUCH FILLER on here that it feels like it could have been trimmed down by about four hours. They hit about eight hours combined, and that isn’t even counting in the four hours of Kickoff Shows.

Now that being said, there is more than enough good in here to make it a show worth seeing (or at least flipping through). This year was all about Austin, Undertaker and McMahon, with Reigns vs. Lesnar feeling almost secondary to what Austin was doing. That won’t sit well with some, but the atmosphere for Austin makes up for so much. Trim it down and it’s great, but as it is, it’s just good.

Results
RKBro b. Street Profits and Alpha Academy – RKO to Gable
Bobby Lashley b. Omos – Spear
Johnny Knoxville b. Sami Zayn – Knoxville pinned Zayn while he was trapped in a giant mousetrap
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley, Natalya/Shayna Baszler and Carmella/Queen Zelina – Elevated Codebreaker to Carmella
Edge b. AJ Styles – Spear
Ridge Holland/Sheamus b. New Day – Northern Grit to Woods
Pat McAfee b. Austin Theory – Rollup
Vince McMahon b. Pat McAfee – Football to the ribs
Roman Reigns b. Brock Lesnar – Spear

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXVIII (Night One): They’re Back

Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night One
Date: April 2, 2022
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 77,899
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, Pat McAfee
America the Beautiful: Brantley Gilbert

We have arrived at the biggest weekend in wrestling and this time it is back in the full capacity stadium. Again, this year’s show is split in two and again it feels like there is a good one night in between the two shows. That was the case last year though and the first night went well so maybe history can repeat itself. Let’s get to it.

Note that I was in attendance for this show, sitting in the third level off the floor in the end zone corner with the stage on my right.

Brantley Gilbert sings America the Beautiful.

Mark Wahlberg stars in the opening video and talks about how these people have a chance for a Texas sized helping of greatness. That is easier said than done though, as it is not easy to reach that level. Everyone has a chance though, so go catch greatness on the Wrestlemania stage. Nothing exactly profound here but having a star do the video is nice.

A lot of fireworks go off.

Here are the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders for an unannounced dance routine. I’m a Cowboys fan and I get the idea here, but does this add anything other than Texas flavor? It isn’t like anyone comes out or gets hyped up here.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Rick Boogs/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Usos

The Usos are defending here but first, Pat McAfee has to lose his freaking mind dancing to Boogs’ guitar intro. You could see him on the announcers’ table from the seats and my goodness his voice makes it all the more over the top/better. We get a quick recap of Boogs faking an injury to help win a #1 contenders match so there is a bit of a backstory here. The Big Match Intros make this all the sweeter in something you don’t often see outside of the main event.

Nakamura starts fast by kicking Jimmy down and it’s already Good Vibrations in the corner. The running knee to the ribs gets two on Jimmy but Jey gets in a cheap shot to take over. A shot from the apron keeps Nakamura down and an enziguri gives Jimmy two. We hit the chinlock for a bit, only to have Nakamura fight up and hit the spinning kick to the head. The double tag brings in Boogs and Jey, with Boogs grabbing him in a bearhug.

That doesn’t last long as Boogs switches to the kneeling vertical suplex for two. A double Samoan drop….goes very badly for Boogs, as his knee buckles under the weight (apparently legitimately, putting him on the shelf for a LONG time). That leaves Nakamura to get the tag and dive onto both champs before striking away at Jey inside. The sliding German suplex looks to set up Kinshasa but Jey hits a superkick. Jimmy adds the Superfly Splash for two and it’s another superkick into the 1D to retain the titles at 6:55.

Rating: C. It’s kind of hard to grade something like this as the injury changed everything. The last two minutes or so were a handicap match and there is a strong chance that they had to come up with something on the fly, so we’ll go with right in the middle to play it safe. The match wasn’t great, but what are you expecting given the circumstances?

Video on Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn in an anything goes match tomorrow.

We recap Happy Corbin vs. Drew McIntyre. Corbin lost everything in one of the most entertaining stories in a long time, but then gambled his way back to financial security. Then he and Madcap Moss injured McIntyre, setting up a FAR too long feud to get us here. For some reason, Corbin and Moss stole McIntyre’s sword, named after his mother. Corbin: “What do McIntyre’s mother and sword have in common? Drew lost both of them.” Of course you know this means war, which started with McIntyre getting the sword back on Smackdown.

Drew McIntyre vs. Happy Corbin

Madcap Moss is here with Corbin, who is billed as UNDEFEATED, because we now keep track of wins and losses since a name change. McIntyre is wearing some dark gray trunks here for a change of pace. Corbin starts fast but gets clotheslined over the top for his efforts. A posting cuts McIntyre off and Smackdown rol….wrong show, never mind.

Back in and a whip into the corner gives Corbin two as McAfee recaps the Corbin saga. A belly to back suplex drops McIntyre for one but Moss gets on the apron for an inadvertent distraction, allowing McIntyre to grab a spinebuster. The overhead belly to belly into the neckbreaker lets McIntyre nip up as things get a bit more intense.

Corbin is right back with a quick Deep Six for two more but McIntyre knocks him down again. The threat of the Claymore sends Corbin outside so McIntyre hits the big flip dive to the floor (that’s not normal for his size). Back in and Corbin hits End of Days out of nowhere for two, with Cole trying to make that a lot bigger than it really is. The Futureshock gives McIntyre two but the Claymore gives him the pin at 8:42.

Rating: C. This could have been on any given of Smackdown and absolutely should have, as this feud was barely good enough for one pay per view match, let alone a months long feud. McIntyre should be ready to move back to the World Title scene and he needed to run these two over to do so. Maybe this leads to the team splitting, but I don’t know what Moss can do with this gimmick going forward.

Post match McIntyre loads up Angela and swings at Moss, hitting the ropes instead. The ropes are sliced in two, but I wonder why it caused an explosion. The Gordian Knot wasn’t that in your face.

We recap the Mysterios vs. Miz/Logan Paul. Miz has been feuding with the two of them and got Paul to help him out, because that’s the best Miz can do. Then Rey had his mask stolen, setting up a feud over respect that feels like it was chosen at random for Paul’s involvement.

Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio vs. Miz/Logan Paul

The bottom rope is out of sync with the others after the replacements were put in. Paul has a Pokemon card in a lanyard around his neck, which I’m assuming is something expensive. Miz takes Rey into the corner to start so Paul comes in pretty early. Some leapfrogs let Paul start well but he drops into the splits, allowing Rey to kick him in the head. That’s enough for Paul so it’s off to Dominik vs. Miz, with the former hitting a Lionsault for two. A dive to the floor takes Miz out but Paul gets in a cheap shot from behind to put Dominik down.

Back in and a pretty nice running powerslam gets two on Dominik, setting up some alternating YES Kicks. Dominik fights out of a chinlock and gets two off a backslide. That’s not enough for a tag though as Paul comes back in with a Blockbuster for two more. Dominik finally manages a tornado DDT to drop Miz and there’s the hot tag to bring in Rey. The big kick to the face gets two on Miz but Paul comes back in to load up a double superplex.

Dominik makes the save so Rey rolls Miz up for two, followed by another spinning DDT for two more. Rey hits some Amigos but gets sent into the post, allowing Paul to hit Three Amigos of his own to some serious booing as that is too far. To make it worse, Paul goes up, does something close to the Eddie dance, and hits the frog splash for a very near fall. Dominik is back in and it’s a double 619 to set up back to back frog splashes but Miz makes the save. The Skull Crushing Finale finishes Rey at 11:16.

Rating: C. The match was ok enough and Paul had clearly put in the effort to make this work out. He did very well with the limited spots he did and the athleticism is there. I’m not sure how well he would work long term, but there have been some far worse celebrity appearances at Wrestlemania (or anywhere for that matter).

Post match Miz and Paul pose…and Miz lays him out with a Skull Crushing Finale. Miz laughs at him and blows a kiss, making me wonder why I’d want to see Miz vs. Paul and what the green thing on Miz’s forehead is.

Video on Edge vs. AJ Styles as we get more and more filler.

Here is Stephanie McMahon to talk about what Wrestlemania means to her. She brings out Gable Steveson and….that’s the segment.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Bianca Belair for the Raw Women’s Title. Belair won the Smackdown Women’s Title last year but then Lynch returned from a year plus away to win the title (completely fairly) at Summerslam. Lynch has since gone full villain and Belair wants the title back. They have traded throat injuries and Belair cut off a bunch of Lynch’s hair to make this even more personal.

Raw Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is defending and gets a special intro (similar to the WWE TV intro as we look at moments from her career)….but Belair one ups her with the Texas Southern University marching band playing her to the ring. They both have special gear, with Lynch coming out in a kind of skirt/jacket combination and Belair in black and red with her top made to look like her lips logo. They both look like they’re on the big stage and it’s an awesome addition.

They both take the time to soak it in a bit but Lynch would rather punch than shake hands. The very early Manhandle Slam gets two and Lynch can’t believe the Summerslam plan didn’t work. Belair goes to the ropes to avoid the Disarm-Her so some covers give Lynch two. They trade rollups for two each and Lynch reverses a suplex into a DDT for two more. Belair tries….something but can’t get Lynch onto her shoulders so she switches to a rollup instead.

They head outside with Lynch slipping off the shoulders to send Belair into the steps to take over. Some Bexploders connect back inside and we hit the chinlock to slow things down a bit. With that broken up, Lynch switches to a cross armbreaker but Belair powers up and dumps her outside for the double crash. Back in and Belair drives some shoulders into the ribs in the corner, setting up a gutbuster for two. The handspring moonsault gets two more but Lynch catches her on top.

Belair gets creative with a Chicago Skyline of all things and a middle rope 450 gets another near fall. Lynch is back up with a Molly Go Round, with her feet hitting Belair in the face (OUCH) for two of her own. Belair is back with a spinebuster and a cradle but the kickout sends her into the corner.

The KOD is broken up but Belair KOD’s her to the floor. That doesn’t work for Belair so she tries to come back inside, only to have Lynch hit the Manhandle Slam onto the steps. Belair dives back in at nine and then kicks out at two, sending Lynch even further into hysteria. Another Bexploder is loaded up but Belair gets to the middle rope, moonsaults over Lynch, and hits the KOD for the pin and the title at 19:09.

Rating: B+. The action was good to great, but what mattered here was the feeling. This felt like the rise of a new champion, with Belair surviving what Lynch threw at her and then winning in the end, showing that she was the better woman when things were even. It came off like the Wrestlemania showdown with the special entrances and gear and I had a great time with the whole deal. Best thing on the show by a mile so far.

Post match Lynch falls out to the floor and collapses as Belair celebrates, giving us a great visual of the fallen former champion and the new queen.

Video on Sasha Banks to fill in more time.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. a mystery opponent. Rollins kept missing opportunities to get to Wrestlemania, which apparently is more important than what you actually do on the show. Finally the solution was “ask Vince McMahon”, who gave him a match against an opponent of Vince’s choosing, making about a month of stupid stories all the more pointless.

Seth Rollins vs. ???

Rollins comes out with a weirdly dressed choir singing his music for a rather Rollins style entrance. We get the big wait until……it’s Cody Rhodes, which was expected but MY GOODNESS the reaction. Rhodes rises up through the stage and comes to the ring as this is where they got me. Your feelings on Cody aside, that wait where I wanted to see who was coming out was the Wrestlemania Moment and it was outstanding.

They stare each other down for a bit and the energy is all back, even with some CODY chants. Feeling out process to start with Rollins grabbing a headlock and shouldering him down. Cody is fine enough to hit the drop down uppercut but neither can hit a finisher. A suplex over the top sends them both crashing to the floor (that’s always a scary one) and Cody pulls him into the post. Back in and Cody grabs the armbar, setting up a short armscissors.

That’s broken up so Rollins hits an enziguri and dropkicks Cody out of the air. There’s a gutbuster to stay on the ribs (Rollins: “Welcome back to the big leagues b****.”) Rollins grabs a bearhug, which looks as out of place as you might expect it to. Cody breaks that up like it’s a bearhug from a guy who isn’t known for his strength and hits the powerslam. With Rollins down on the floor, Cody hits a suicide dive but the Disaster Kick off the steps is countered into a powerbomb into the barricade.

Back in and the Falcon Arrow gives Rollins two but the Stomp is countered into Cross Rhodes for two (because a returning star’s finisher should always only get a near fall). Cody goes up but gets caught in a reverse superplex into D-Von’s lifting reverse DDT for two of his own. The Phoenix Splash misses so they both tease Pedigrees before Rhodes hits a tiger bomb for two.

The Cody Cutter gets the same as the fans are WAY into this. Rollins’ Pedigree gets its own near fall and some Kawada Kicks set up the forearm to the back of the head. Cody isn’t having that so he hits back to back Cross Rhodes…for no cover. Instead it’s the Bionic Elbow into a fourth Cross Rhodes for the pin at 21:34.

Rating: B+. Yeah this was WAY better here than it was watching it live as they had a more modern style match of trading big moves. Cody winning was the only way to go, if nothing else for the sake of not scaring off other AEW stars who might want to come over. I’m not sure what Cody’s ceiling is in WWE, but they absolutely stuck the landing with his return. Great match, after an even better reveal.

Cody gets to soak in some well deserved cheers and kisses the mat because he’s back.

We look at last night’s Hall of Fame ceremony, which featured a cool idea of walking through the wrestlers on the way to the ring. The wrestlers looking scared at the idea of Scott Steiner on a live mic is great, but not as great as Shad Gaspard’s wife telling her son how great Shad was. Vince McMahon introducing Undertaker as Mark Calaway is….just wrong to hear.

Here is the class in person:

Steiner Brothers (they were up there with Demolition for most overdue tag team)
Shad Gaspard (that was a hard one to sit through)
Queen Sharmell (harmless enough)
Vader (how was he not in before)
Undertaker (I’ve seen that Wrestlemania entrance a few times and it will never be anything less than awe inspiring, even with Undertaker in a suit and looking emotional as he thanks the fans)

Video on Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory. The fact that I went to the restroom after it started and it was still going when I got back says this went on too long.

Rick Boogs has wrecked his knee and had to be carried out of the stadium. Apparently he has torn his quadricep patella and will need surgery.

The attendance is 77,899. Assuming reports were correct, that means they sold about 20,000 tickets in three days. I’m sure.

Long video on Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte for the Smackdown Women’s Title. The video compares their successes in their main sports before showing the two of them being ready to clash here.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey

Rousey is challenging and strikes her way out of the corner to put Charlotte in the ropes. A cheap shot has Rousey in trouble but she grabs a rollup for two. That means it’s time for Rousey to adjust her shorts before she sends Charlotte into the corner. Charlotte lands on the apron so Rousey knees her in the face and chokes a bit. The ankle lock goes on with Charlotte still on the apron so she pulls Rousey outside for the break. A posting gives Charlotte two and we hit the front facelock.

Charlotte hits a forearm/clothesline (the replay looked nasty) for two more and the neck crank goes on. That’s broken up so Rousey hits a knee for two of her own, followed by…something mistimed out of the corner. Rousey’s middle rope bulldog gets two but Charlotte is back with a spear for the same. A belly to back suplex gives us a double knockdown but it’s Charlotte up first. The double moonsault kind of connects for two so Charlotte ties her in the Tree of Woe.

That means a Boston crab in the ropes of all things but Rousey escapes and judo throws her down. Piper’s Pit can’t connect so they trade some shots to the face for another breather. Another Piper’s Pit is countered but Rousey grabs the ankle lock. That’s reversed into one from Charlotte, who gets rolled into the corner for the escape. The armbar is countered into a powerbomb for two on Rousey but she’s right back with the ankle lock, complete with the grapevine.

Charlotte escapes that as well and we hit the Figure Eight, which is turned over for the escape before they both roll into the ropes. They go outside so Charlotte can hit a fall away slam into the barricade and it’s time for a slugout back inside. Piper’s Pit gives Rousey three but the referee waves it off because of the foot on the ropes. Natural Selection gives Charlotte a very close two but her spear hits the referee. The armbar goes on and Charlotte taps to no referee. Naturally the referee pops up as Rousey yells at him, allowing Charlotte to hit a big boot for the pin at 18:32.

Rating: B-. That was longer than it needed to be and are you surprised that Charlotte was the one to get the first singles win over Rousey? I’m not sure what this means for Rousey but I could go for seeing her turn heel. The smiling stuff just feels fake so let her bring back the Death Stare and be the Rousey that got her here in the first place. The match was a good, back and forth fight but there were some botches in there and Charlotte getting this latest honor made me roll my eyes pretty hard.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

We run down Night Two.

Video on Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns.

Wrestlemania XXXIX will be in Los Angeles on April 1 and 2, 2023. This is the new normal isn’t it?

We recap Kevin Owens vs. Steve Austin, which isn’t a match but that’s more or less what we’re seeing here. Owens spent weeks insulting Texas before realizing he needed a path to Wrestlemania. Therefore he invited Austin onto the KO Show, with Austin accepting and promising a fight.

Here is Kevin Owens for the KO Show and yeah the fans don’t seem too happy with him. Owens wastes no time in insulting Texas again, saying that if America was a person, Texas would be the a**. However, he does apologize…for speaking the honest truth about Texas. Owens knows the fans are wanting him to bring Austin out there but it’s going to be on his time. Austin is the worst role model and Owens knows this because he used to look up to him. When Austin comes out here, Owens is going to insult him and if Austin doesn’t like it, it’ll be a Stunner and beer poured over him.

Cue Glass Shatter and WOW that is a reaction. Austin is as over as free beer in a frat house and takes some extra time to soak all of this in, as he should. Hold on though as Austin goes to the back and brings out his ATV to ride to the ring, as he tends to do. The set is promptly destroyed, leaving the two of them and two chairs. Owens says cut the music, leaving Austin to fix his knee brace. This is Owens’ show, so take a seat.

Austin doesn’t like Owens talking trash about Texas, but Owens asks what is so great about this place. Owens rants on Texas clothes and says if he lived here, he would have moved to Mexico (Owens: “It’s right there.”). Austin: “In five seconds, you’re going to have 70,000 people calling you an a******.” That’s fine with Owens, who says he lied to get Austin here. Instead, he doesn’t want to talk, but because he is looking for a fight. Really, Owens is here to challenge Austin to a match. Yeah it has been 19 years and Austin’s knees, back and neck were shot back then and must be even worse here.

Owens is challenging him to a No Holds Barred match right now, which has Austin thinking about it. Austin’s facials here are outstanding as you can see him thinking about going to that place one more time. Owens says either get ready or get on the golf cart and ride out again. Austin says his first match was here in Dallas, and now his last match might be too. He leaves it to the fans and says bring him a referee out here, because this is actually happening.

Steve Austin vs. Kevin Owens

No Holds Barred and my goodness I can’t believe I’m seeing this. They talk trash and the slugout is on, with Austin naturally getting the better of things. A bunch of stomps in the corner have something mudhole related going on and Austin does it again for good measure. They head outside where Austin has a beer, followed by a clothesline and a drop onto the barricade. Owens is back with a posting though and he beats on Austin with a tripod.

It’s table time (that feels so wrong in an Austin match….because Austin is actually having a match) but Owens is sent through it instead. They fight into the crowd, where Owens actually hits a suplex onto the concrete (egads). Back to ringside and Austin is able to slam him off the barricade and onto (not through) the announcers’ table. More beer is consumed and Austin hammers away on the table, followed by more beer.

Owens manages a neck snap across the top but makes the mistake of going over to Austin’s ATV. Austin isn’t having that and jumps him before driving the ATV (with Owens on it) up the ramp. A pair of suplexes on the stage (one per side) have Owens in trouble and Austin throws him back down the ramp. Back in and Austin has some more beer but Owens grabs a Stunner for two. Owens gets a chair but the swing hits the rope and bounces back onto his own head, setting up the real Stunner to give Austin the pin at 13:52.

Rating: B. This is a weird situation as Austin could have come out there and juggled kittens to the biggest reaction of the night. What made this work was the fact that Austin wound up looking good, all things considered. He didn’t have the same explosiveness but that is to be expected after so long away. This was an actual match, albeit a garbage one, but it let Austin have one more moment and that is not something that is easy to pull off whatsoever. Above all else, this was a special moment and I still can’t believe it actually happened.

Post match Austin drinks even more beer and gives Owens another Stunner, leaving Owens to be taken out by some cops. Austin throws a beer to a guy in the crowd, who fumbles it for a funny moment. Austin is glad to be back in Texas…and for some reason Byron Saxton gets in the ring to celebrate with him. Corey Graves is downright giddy, knowing that Saxton is about to get Stunned, which is of course what happens (that was funny). Austin’s brother gets in the ring for a beer with him and Austin celebrates some more to end the show.

After the show was over, Austin celebrated some more and took some laps on his ATV before finally leaving.

Overall Rating: B+. This show took its time getting started but then got on a roll in a hurry by the second half. The last four matches are all good to great and they nailed the three important moments, with Cody’s return, Belair’s win (the whole match really) and then Austin to cap it all off. As usual, WWE knows how to make things work when they’re trying and that was the case here, though the first half was just ok. That being said, this was a pretty solid smash and night two has its work cut out.

Results
Usos b. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs – 1D to Nakamura
Drew McIntyre b. Happy Corbin – Claymore
Miz/Logan Paul b. Mysterios – Skull Crushing Finale to Rey
Bianca Belair b. Becky Lynch – KOD
Cody Rhodes b. Seth Rollins – Cross Rhodes
Charlotte b. Ronda Rousey – Big boot
Steve Austin b. Kevin Owens – Stunner

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Quick Live Thoughts From Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night One

I took in the first night of Wrestlemania XXXVIII and it was about as Wrestlemania as you can get. Your mileage may vary as you can imagine.

After parking in the adjacent Walmart parking lot for free and walking through the absolute maze that is the stadium to get to my seat, one thing became obvious: WWE has forgotten how to warm up a crowd. I got there about an hour into the Kickoff Show and for the most part was treated to a steady shot of the DJ playing music on the huge video screen. No package, no Kickoff Show, no hype videos, no MATCHES IN THE RING.

It’s the same way it went at the Royal Rumble but now I have to listen to bad music. WWE can’t find any two people and throw them out there for ten minutes on the biggest stage of their career? You can’t put Drew Gulak and R-Truth out there for a comedy match? Just ANYTHING but looking around for the better part of two hours? Titus O’Neil coming out for a charity deal was a breath of air and it was something that belonged on a bumper for Peacock. I don’t get this new philosophy but, again, WWE doesn’t think much of entertaining the people once they get in the building.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs

It’s really hard to comment on this one as Boogs blew out his knee and there is only so much that can be done as a result. Odds are that changed the finish as Nakamura and Bogs winning the titles seemed like a foregone conclusion. It wasn’t a great match in the first place, but my goodness it is sad to see someone as charismatic as Boogs put on the shelf when he is getting this much out of Nakamura.

Drew McIntyre vs. Happy Corbin

McIntyre won, as he should have, and then sliced up the top rope with his sword. The biggest question I have is why an explosion went off when he cut the ropes. Secondary question: why did he cut the rope? What did that rope do to him? He’ll cut that but not cut himself out of the feud with Corbin and Moss? Come on already, by which I mean come on and give McIntyre ANYTHING else to do.

Miz/Logan Paul vs. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio

So I was sitting with these two guys (father and son) watching the show and one of them had no idea who Paul was. I can’t imagine he was alone, which makes Paul quite the odd celebrity to bring in as he isn’t exactly a household name. Anyway, the villains win because this is Celebrity Mania, but then Miz turns on Paul because…..stop me before I go any further. Throw in a bunch of required Eddie Guerrero tributes because he must be tributed and we move on.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Bianca Belair

First things first: they both looked great. I don’t mean attractive (not that they weren’t) but they both had on special gear and looked like they were coming in for the big fight. That is what I want out of Wrestlemania and the two of them delivered. The match itself was also a showdown with both of them working hard, but what I loved was the ending. After Belair won, Lynch fell out of the ring and hit the ground, because she had nothing left and had been defeated. There is something about the visual of Belair celebrating over the fallen champion that makes it feel like what we’re seeing is special and it worked. Great stuff.

Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins

The match itself was immaterial here because of one reason: I got the Wrestlemania feeling. This was my fifth Wrestlemania and it is rare to get that feeling that you are in a moment. From the time the lights went out to the time the opening bell rang, it was goosebumps as Rhodes returning was important. I wasn’t crazy about the match as it went on too long, but they nailed every bit of the atmosphere with this and that is what is going to be remembered. I have no idea what Rhodes is going to do, but the debut was excellent and that is what matters.

Undertaker’s entrance live is still a sight to behold and always will be.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte(c) vs. Ronda Rousey

Oh where to begin. Well first of all, is ANYONE surprised that Charlotte is the first person to pin Rousey in a singles match? If you are, pay more attention, because Charlotte must have the accolades. The match itself wasn’t great, but Rousey’s comebacks got the fans into it more and more. That being said, I’m a Rousey fan but it’s not there in this run and that is becoming more and more obvious. I don’t know where this is going, though if she doesn’t crank up the intensity (a heel turn could be fascinating), this isn’t going to work.

And then the moment we’ve all been waiting for (Including New Day, Sheamus and Ridge Holland who actually didn’t make it onto this 4+ hour show. If WWE can’t put them on the Kickoff Show and give the DJ a break for five minutes, I’ll lose a good bit of the respect I have left for the company. Get them on there somehow, even if it’s a two minute match.): the return of Steve Austin. After some talking with Kevin Owens, we got this, and I was a bit shocked.

Steve Austin vs. Kevin Owens

Yes, this really happened and while it was No Holds Barred, it was an actual match, as Austin did his usual stuff, took bumps (including a suplex on the floor) and then pinned Owens with the Stunner. Austin didn’t have the explosiveness, but he’ll be sixty in three years and hasn’t wrestled in nearly twenty years so give him a break. What mattered is Austin could have gone out there and juggled kittens to a positive reaction but this was an actual match.

In a word (which has already been used more than once) though, this was special. It was a moment to hear that glass shatter again and know what was coming. I’m not an Austin fan (though I completely respect what he did in wrestling) but I knew what I was seeing live and it made me smile. Oddly enough, at least to date, Austin and the Rock’s final matches have both been impromptu matches taking place in the same building. That’s kind of fascinating.

Overall Thoughts

While I still want Wrestlemania to be one night again (and shortened), I had a pretty good time overall. It needed to be shorter, but the Belair vs. Lynch match, Cody’s return and Austin made the whole thing worthwhile. Now if they can make the second show work as well, we’ll be in a better place, but this was a solid success for the first night.

Full review hopefully going up Sunday, but I can’t promise anything.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two (2021 Redo): Five Minutes To History

Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two
Date: April 5, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the second half of one of the weirdest shows ever and I’m not sure what that is going to mean. Even a year later, this show is mostly forgotten outside of the main event and I’m curious to see how the rest of it holds up. I was actually surprised by some of what’s on the card as it has completely escaped me over the last year. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Natalya vs. Liv Morgan

You know, you don’t have to have a Kickoff Show match if this is as good as you can get. Natalya headlocks her down to start but lets it go for an early standoff. A rollup gives Morgan two and she gets some sarcastic applause for a bonus. Morgan ducks a clothesline with the Matrix and rolls her up for two more, allowing her to get in her own sarcastic applause.

Natalya is right back with her belly to back drop into the step over basement dropkick for two more. The surfboard goes on and Morgan screams a lot but she avoids a charge in the corner to grab another rollup. A Codebreaker gives Morgan two and Natalya’s sitout wheelbarrow faceplant gets the same. The Sharpshooter attempt is countered into a step up enziguri and Morgan grabs another rollup for the pin at 6:22.

Rating: C-. This was as interesting as it was going to get with Morgan trying one rollup after another to little avail until the ending. Morgan always seems like someone they want to push to the moon but can’t figure out how to get there. This win isn’t going to be some game changer, but at least they gave her something, even if this was nearly depressing as a way to start the night.

Stephanie McMahon gives us a quick welcome.

We get the same still pretty great pirate parody opening video.

Rob Gronkowski talks about knowing a thing or two about dropping the hammer on a championship Sunday.

NXT Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is defending and it’s a shame that she didn’t get the big moment after the pretty cool video of her walking into the empty Raymond James Stadium. We get the recap video after Charlotte’s entrance, as Charlotte won the Royal Rumble and Ripley threw her hat in the ring, meaning it was time for Charlotte to go after the NXT Women’s Title again. Ripley looks a bit weird in blue tights but Wrestlemania has had some strange choices over the year.

Charlotte takes her down to start and we hit the trash talk in a hurry. Ripley seems to be favoring her knee as they lock up and Charlotte drives her into the corner. The chops, with more trash talk, have Ripley in more trouble but she comes out with the Riptide for a quick two. That’s enough to send Charlotte outside for a breather so Ripley follows her out with an elbow to the face.

A flip dive off the steps takes Charlotte down again and Ripley sends her face first into the mat back inside. Ripley gets two more off a snap suplex and it’s time to kick Charlotte in the back. The bodyscissors stays on the ribs but Charlotte gets in a shot to the leg for a breather. Another kick to the knee has Ripley in trouble and Charlotte twists it around to make things even worse.

The leg is wrapped around the post but Ripley comes back with a belly to back faceplant. Ripley is back up with some good knees to the face, setting up a dropkick to a kneeling Charlotte. A lot of shouting at the knee drives Ripley on but Charlotte sends her to the apron for another kick to the knee. Ripley catches her on top for an electric chair faceplant but Charlotte hits her in the face. The knee to the knee in the corner misses though and Ripley scores with a missile dropkick, which bangs up the knee even more.

Charlotte is back up with a chop block but Ripley grabs the legs for the Prism Trap (such a cool name). That’s reversed into a Boston crab but Ripley powers out into a pinfall reversal sequence. Back up and Ripley scores with a big boot for two and frustration is setting in. Ripley takes her up top but gets shoved down, only to get the boots up to block the moonsault. Charlotte hits a spear for two so it’s time for the Figure Eight for the tap and the title at 20:27.

Rating: B+. This felt like a battle and a struggle, which is exactly how it should have felt. They made it feel important, but I really can’t get behind the idea of Charlotte winning here. It’s like she came in and showed NXT how little they mean compared to the main roster. Charlotte has won everything there is to win in WWE, so why did she need to win this too? Ripley needed this win a lot more than Charlotte, but that has never stopped WWE before.

Long video on night one.

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley

Lana is here with Lashley and this might be the greatest example of “what a difference a year makes” in recent memory. Black has horns on his shoulders because of course he does. Lashley powers him around to start and then does it again to make his point clear. A leg dive doesn’t work for Black as Lashley supelxes him down and hammers away.

Lashley misses a charge and falls out to the floor but Black misses the middle rope moonsault, earning himself a suplex. There’s a running shoulder to the ribs in the corner, setting up a neckbreaker to drop Black again. Black knees his way out of the delayed vertical suplex but Lashley snaps off a powerslam for two more.

Now the suplex can connect for two but Black is back with kicks to the legs. Another kick puts Lashley on the floor and now the middle rope moonsault connects. Back in and Lashley hits a crossbody of all things for two but Lana gets on the steps for no logical reason. The Dominator is loaded up but Lana demands a spear….which charges into Black Mass to give Black the pin at 7:16.

Rating: C. Not a bad back and forth match here but the ending didn’t do it many favors. Lana and Lashley was an idea that went on too long and pretty much never worked but WWE didn’t seem to get the idea for a good while. Then there’s Black and egads what happened with him? He had a nice push in the spring and summer but then it just all fell apart later on, because WWE. I don’t get it either, because he just pinned a big star clean here and then WWE just gave up.

Bayley and Sasha Banks aren’t worried about the five way tonight. They are united to keep Bayley’s Smackdown Women’s Title because they are best friends. Bayley leaves but when asked if she wants to win the title, Banks says we’ll see.

We look at Mojo Rawley winning the 24/7 Title last night.

Rob Gronkowski wants the 24/7 Title.

We recap Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler. Otis and Mandy Rose seem to have a thing for each other but Ziggler doesn’t get it. Then he and Sonya Deville got together to split them up before they could get together, with Mandy getting together with Ziggler instead. The Smackdown hacker intervened and shows the plot, meaning Mandy and Otis can be on the same page once Otis deals with Ziggler. Yeah this was kind of nuts but it was funny and oddly charming.

Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler

Sonya Deville is here with Ziggler, who is chased outside before the bell. Otis splashes him in the corner to start but Ziggler is right back with a superkick to the floor. A posting gives Ziggler two back inside and we hit the choke. There’s a dropkick for two more and the choking moves to the ropes this time. The jumping elbow sets up something like a rear naked choke, which Otis breaks up in a hurry. Otis starts the jiggling and hammers away, including the running clotheslines.

A slam lets Otis step on Ziggler’s back and a whip into the corner puts Ziggler down again. Otis sends him outside for a whip into the barricade, followed by a posting for a bonus. Back in and a pop up World’s Strongest Slam has Ziggler in trouble and Sonya demanding that he get up. A Sonya distraction lets Ziggler get in a low blow and they’re both down for a bit. Cue Mandy Rose (you knew this was coming) to slap Sonya and hit Ziggler low, setting up the Caterpillar to give Otis the pin at 8:09.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing beyond a Smackdown level match but I was stunned by the result. I really would never have bet that Otis would have beaten Ziggler so well done on the surprise ending and going the right way. There was no logical reason for Ziggler to win here, which was exactly why I would have expected it. Otis and Mandy were never going to be a long term angle, but for a one off moment, this was very well done.

Post match Otis picks Mandy up and they have their first kiss, which would have been a great moment with a crowd.

We recap Edge vs. Randy Orton. Edge returned in the Royal Rumble for the huge surprise, where he eliminated Orton. This made Orton ask if Edge wanted to reunited Rated RKO one more time, only to surprise Edge with a big beatdown. With Edge gone, Orton gave his wife Beth Phoenix an RKO, which was treated like the worst thing ever, because Beth went from a Hall of Famer to a damsel in distress. Orton explained that he was doing this to save Edge from turning into what Orton had become, even if it meant ending his career all over again. Makes wrestling sense and it set up a Last Man Standing match, so who am I to complain?

Edge vs. Randy Orton

Last Man Standing and dang it must be awful for Edge to put in all that work and his Wrestlemania entrance is in front of an empty building. Orton runs in from behind (thanks to the classic cameraman disguise) with the RKO and the referee has to ask Edge if he wants to do this. That’s an of course so Orton hits another RKO for an early nine. They head outside with Orton hitting him in the face with the camera for seven so let’s go backstage.

It’s off to the gym first with Orton using a strap from a gym machine (in a moment whose accidental significance went completely over my head live) to choke him but Edge gets back up and hits him with a chain. Edge hammers him onto a table and then into a chair to pound away even more. We go aerial as Edge grabs a machine and uses it to pull himself up and land on Orton in the chair. Edge shouts about nine years but gets whipped into a wall to put him down.

Orton can’t quite crush him with a sled so Edge sends him into some equipment. They fight into a rather narrow hallway where Orton goes face first into a garage door. That’s only good for six though as Edge wants to beat him up some more. It’s back into the arena now with Orton throwing Edge into the barricade. Edge uses said barricade to pull himself up at nine so it’s time to go backstage again, this time to the office area. They take turns ramming each other into a board room table until Edge sends him face first into a wall.

Orton is thrown onto the table and Edge pulls himself up on the….whatever the chain link stuff is above the table to drop an elbow. We lose a cameraman so another has to run in to catch them in a storage room. Orton staggers away with his left arm pretty banged up, but he is able to knock Edge onto an anvil case. They go through more stuff with Edge finding some chairs, which Orton throws away in a hurry. A whip into a bunch of stuff gives Orton nine and they wind up in what loos like an interview area.

Edge gets in a few more shots of his own, including a kick to the ribs, and they’re both down for a breather. With Orton knocked onto a table, Edge climbs a ladder onto a scaffold and drops a huge elbow through Orton through said table for a double eight. It’s time to stagger around some more, this time with Orton’s shoulder bleeding. Orton sends him into more equipment for another eight and then takes him onto the back of a covered pick up truck.

The hanging DDT onto said cover gives us another double eight and they climb onto the top of a big production truck. Edge cuts off a Punt with the spear for nine but another spear charges into an RKO. With Edge getting up again, Orton drops down and grabs some chairs to take back to the top of the truck. Orton sounds like he mentions Edge’s daughters but the Conchairto is countered into a standing choke. That’s enough to knock Orton out but Edge says stop counting. The Conchairto crushes him for good and Edge wins at 36:40.

Rating: B-. I liked this one way more the first time around as this really did feel long here. They had some good violence and beat each other up but you easily could have cut out ten plus minutes and done the same thing. You also get into the same problem that so many Last Man Standing matches have, in that you spend so much time waiting on the counts that the match loses a lot of steam. I still like it, but cut this stuff down.

Back in the arena, Mojo Rawley runs from the menagerie of numskulls but Rob Gronkowski dives off a balcony onto the pile to win the title. Apparently this took HOURS to film as Gronkowski wouldn’t do it, even after Vince McMahon himself demonstrated the dive (the video released of Vince doing it is kind of awesome).

Raw Tag Team Titles: Austin Theory/Angel Garza vs. Street Profits

The Profits are defending and Theory is a last minute replacement for an injured Andrade, just to hammer home how messy this show is. Zelina Vega is here with the challengers too. Dawkins headlocks Theory to start and then runs him over with a shoulder. The champs start taking turns on the shoulder but Theory sends Dawkins outside. That means Garza can hit a superkick, allowing him to come inside and TAKE OFF HIS PANTS.

Some kicks to Dawkins’ ribs set up a seated abdominal stretch but Dawkins flips out without much trouble. Ford comes in to clean house and there’s the big flip dive onto Theory (and Dawkins by mistake). Back in and Garza kicks Ford down, setting up a Lionsault for two. The Wing Clipper is countered with an enziguri though and the hot tag brings in Dawkins. Theory catches him with a quick TKO but Ford comes in with the frog splash to give Dawkins the retaining pin at 6:23.

Rating: D+. There was a very firm limit to what they could do here with no real feud between one of the teams hadn’t even been together for a week and they didn’t even have seven minutes to do their thing. It felt like a Raw match and in this case, that is about as good as you could have expected. The Profits were brand new champions here and as usual, there weren’t exactly a ton of teams for them to challenge them. Take away one of the only ones around and how good could this have been?

Post match the beatdown is on but Bianca Belair runs in for her debut and takes out Vega.

Titus O’Neil has taken over hosting duties, meaning he says he’s hosting.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Lacey Evans vs. Tamina vs. Naomi

Bayley is defending under elimination rules and Naomi’s entrance is still cool even in an empty arena. Everyone goes after Tamina to start because it is Wrestlemania season and therefore she matters again. With Tamina knocked to the floor, the other four pair off until Bayley and Banks double team Evans for two. The mini tag match breaks out with Lacey and Naomi hitting stereo dropkicks for stereo near falls.

Tamina (sorry, the POWERFUL Tamina) gets back in to wreck everyone and gets a few near falls. Bayley and Lacey are kicked to the floor, leaving us with a Team BAD reunion, assuming more than about 4% of the audience actually remembers that weird trios period at the start of the Women’s Revolution. Tamina gets double teamed down and it’s a parade of finishers to get rid of her at 6:26 (because Tamina is Andre the Giant at Wrestlemania).

With the unstoppable monster stopped, Bayley starts beating on everyone else with the trash talk thrown in for a bonus. Naomi comes back in to beat up Bayley and Banks at the same time, including a Rear View to Banks and a middle rope kick to both. That’s about it for the Offense though as the Bank Statement makes Naomi tap at 10:15. Bayley: “DANCE TO THE BACK!”

Bayley and Banks double team Lacey, including something like a double powerbomb for two. A running knee (Bayley: “THIS IS FOR SUMMER”!, meaning Lacey’s daughter) hits Banks by mistake and the cracks seem ready to form. The distraction lets Lacey hit the Woman’s Right to finish Banks at 13:26 (with Cole’s call being heard on the replay, because the building is that quiet).

So it’s one on one with Evans hammering away and grabbing a neckbreaker for two. Bayley sends her shoulder first into the post though and the stomping ensues. More shouting and right hands in the corner have Lacey in trouble but she gets up a boot to cut Bayley off. The slingshot Bronco Buster connects and the double springboard moonsault gets two. Cue Sasha with a Backstabber to Lacey though, allowing Bayley to hit the bulldog driver to retain at 19:18.

Rating: C. It worked well, even after the awesome force that is Tamina was gone. At least these four have some backstories and characters so it is a little bit better than having five random people in there doing all of their spots as fast as they can. Bayley retaining is fine enough, as she has a tendency to do well at Wrestlemania, though Lacey winning the title would have been a nice feel good moment.

Wrestlemania 37 is in Los Angeles. I’m sure.

We recap John Cena vs. the Fiend in the Firefly Funhouse Match. Cena returned a few weeks ago and didn’t a Wrestlemania match but the Fiend showed up to point at the sign (because THE FIEND has to point at the sign) and the challenge was on. Bray Wyatt then explained that this is fallout from Cena beating him at Wrestlemania XXX, which is what send Wyatt completely over the edge and led to the creation of the Fiend. It makes enough sense and that’s all it needs to do for the most part.

John Cena vs. The Fiend

Cena does his full entrance and we cut to the Funhouse, where Wyatt says Cena will be fighting himself. Cena follows him through the door and I guess we’ll say the match starts there. With Cena standing in the dark, Puppet Vince pops up to ask if Cena has the ruthless aggression to be a star. If not, he’s fired. Bray appears in the ring and calls out someone for a fight and here’s Cena in his 2002 gear to say RUTHLESS AGGRESSION (ala his debut against Kurt Angle) but he can’t hit the slap on Bray. Wyatt: “You can look but you can’t touch!”

Bray disappears and we hit the Saturday Night’s Main Event intro (yeah don’t bother to try and make sense out of some of the pieces of this). Bray does a Hulk Hogan impression (behind a piece of the big blue cage of course) and talks about how his partner Johnny Largemeat is all about the muscles. Cena, lifting weights, comes in and does a Hogan/Randy Savage hybrid impression. He lifts so much his arms won’t come up anymore and now it’s off to the Dr. of Thuganomics Cena.

Wyatt and Cena are in the ring again with Cena realizing that he can only speak in rhyme. We get a Husky Harris joke and Cena talks about taking chances. That’s too much for Wyatt, who calls Cena a bully to takes others’ weaknesses and turns them into jokes. Cena throws the nuts at Wyatt, who knocks him out with a chain. Now it’s cult leader Wyatt and we go to the Wrestlemania XXX match, which Wyatt calls his grandest failure. Back in the ring now, with Wyatt saying it is time to rewrite his own story.

Bray hands Cena a chair (again ala Wrestlemania) and tells Cena to fix his mistake. This time Cena swings….and now we’re on Nitro, with Bray as Eric Bischoff to introduce the Hollywood Hogan version of Cena. Puppet Vince: “IT’S SUCH GOOD S***!” Cena freaks out and realizes he is beating up Huskus the Pig. The Fiend pops up behind him for the Mandible Claw and, after hearing Cena calls Bray overhyped and privileged, Sister Abigail finishes at about 13:30.

Rating: A+. This is one of those things that was amazing live and then it gets even better when you have a chance to think about the thing. This was a huge deconstruction of the entire John Cena legacy, down to what would have happened if he had finally turned heel like so many people wanted him to.

It turns into a What If/Road Not Taken idea and that is amazing to see, as Cena really does have a detailed and incredible rise to the top. Wyatt sees him as a fraud who has done everything he can to hold others, including Wyatt himself, down and he needed to avenge his Wrestlemania XXX loss. This was outstanding and one of the most well thought out and incredible ideas that I’ve seen WWE ever present, and I’m probably missing big parts of the whole thing.

Titus O’Neil isn’t sure what he just saw.

We recap Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar. McIntyre was the Chosen One but screwed up and got fired, so he reinvented himself and came back to WWE as a man. Then McIntyre won the Royal Rumble, eliminating Brock Lesnar in the process. Cue the title match, as McIntyre is finally ready to achieve his destiny.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and for once, Paul Heyman doesn’t’ handle his introduction. Drew hits the first Claymore for the first two count at 17 seconds. Another Claymore is countered into the German suplex, followed by a second for a bonus. There’s the third and McIntyre is in trouble. The F5 gets one (that’s Drew’s thing) and another gets two. There’s a third F5 for another near fall (Heyman: “He’s really good. Hit him again! He can’t keep kicking out all night!”) but McIntyre escapes the fourth. Three straight Claymores make Drew champion at 4:32.

Rating: C+. It was fun and energetic but I’m completely over watching this style. It has been done to death and I could go for something fresh. Is it asking too much for a ten minute match instead of ten finishers in four minutes? McIntyre winning was the only way you could go here as Lesnar has been champion for so long recently that it no longer has any impact. This went as it should have, but egads find a better way to do them.

McIntyre celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked this one better than the first night by a good stretch as the matches certainly felt bigger. The main event and some other things came off like they belonged on Wrestlemania, but there are still things that make this show feel like absolutely nothing. Again though, you can only put so much of that on WWE as they were up against the wall and had to do a lot of things at the last minute. It was good if you give them a lot of breaks and really, how can you not with a show like this?

Overall Overall Rating: C+. Of course this didn’t feel like Wrestlemania and that is because it barely was Wrestlemania. The problem is that with so much build and setup for the whole thing, WWE absolutely had to do something, especially if television was going to continue as usual. No it isn’t good by comparison to other Wrestlemanias but nothing was the same around this time. Things would get better going forward but this was still the dark ages of the pandemic. They did what they could here and in that regard, this show worked out as well as it could have.

Ratings Comparison

Liv Morgan vs. Natalya

Original: D+

2021 Redo: C-

Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Original: C+

2021 Redo: B+

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: D+

2021 Redo: C

Dolph Ziggler vs. Otis

Original: D+

2021 Redo: C-

Randy Orton vs. Edge

Original: B

2021 Redo: B-

Street Profits vs. Angel Garza/Austin Theory

Original: D+

2021 Redo: D+

Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Naomi vs. Tamina vs. Lacey Evans

Original: D

2021 Redo: C

John Cena vs. The Fiend

Original: N/A

2021 Redo: A+

Brock Lesnar vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: D

2021 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C-

2021 Redo: B-

Overall Overall Rating

Original: C

2021 Redo: C+

That’s one of the biggest changes I can remember having as the matches almost all went up and then the overall rating barely goes up. This was hardly a normal show though so the drastic swing a year later isn’t surprising.

Here is the original review if you are interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2020/04/05/wrestlemania-xxxvi-night-two-the-wwe-psyche/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.