Wrestlemania XII
Date: March 31, 1996
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 18,853
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

This is all about Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart. The main event is an hour long Iron Man Match with Bret defending against the absolutely on fire Shawn Michaels. Since returning last May, Shawn has hit a stride where he is without a doubt the best in the world. There’s almost nothing else on the entire card other than Undertaker vs. Diesel as the Streak finally has a big match included. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the dream of the champion (to stay on top) and the challenger (to rise to the top of the mountain). They make the match feel like a very big deal which is the right idea. Good stuff.

Camp Cornette vs. Yokozuna/Jake Roberts/Ahmed Johnson

Camp Cornette is Vader/Owen Hart/British Bulldog and if they lose, Yoko gets five minutes alone with Cornette. Of all the music for the faces to come out to, they pick Yoko’s? The monsters brawl to start and Yoko takes him down with a clothesline. Another one sends Vader to the floor and Ahmed hits a big dive over the top to take Vader down again. Back in and they slug it out some more before it’s off to Owen. Yoko is so fat here it’s amazing that he can move.

After Owen gets beaten up a bit it’s back to Vader for more hard shots to the head. Vader pounds him down to the mat but Yoko is able to get over to Ahmed for a not hot tag. Johnston starts cleaning house on everyone until Vader gets in a shot from behind to take him down. A jumping senton misses Ahmed though and a flying clothesline puts Vader down.

We settle down to Johnsn vs. Bulldog with Ahmed loading up the Pearl River Plunge (Tiger Bomb), only to have Hart hit a missile dropkick to break it up. Owen drags him back to the corner and here’s more Vader. A splash crushes Johnson but there’s still no cover. Back to Owen who is clotheslined down almost immediately and there’s the real hot tag to Jake. Oh and Mr. Fuji is in the face corner with an American flag.

Owen avoids the DDT and Jake charges into a knee in the corner. Bulldog puts on the front facelock so the fans chant USA. At least most of the face team is made in America this time. Back to Vader for the hard clothesline and a slam, followed by a top rope elbow from Owen. That gets two so Owen cranks back on both of Jake’s arms for a bit. Bulldog comes in but the powerslam only gets two as well. It was a clean kickout too which is pretty odd to see.

Vader comes in for a splash but THAT only gets two as well. The fans don’t seem all that interested in this though. Bulldog tries a splash of his own but Roberts rolls away to buy himself some time. The other hot tag brings in Yoko to face Vader with the latter being punched down in the corner. Yoko cleans house on all three villains and crushes Bulldog with a belly to belly. The DDT hits Owen but Jake has to take out an interfering Cornette. Jake loads up the DDT on Cornette but Vader runs him over and the Vader Bomb is finally enough to pin Roberts.

Rating: C. Nice tag match here but the crowd doesn’t seem interested in the show so far. Hopefully they’re just saving it up for the main event which is the only match that matters on the entire show. Johnson looked good and would get pushed to the Intercontinental Title soon after this. The other guys all looked like themselves.

We recap Piper vs. Goldust which was supposed to be Razor vs. Goldust but Razor got in trouble for drugs. The idea is that Goldust is in lust with Piper but the REAL MAN Piper will have none of this gay stuff. The result is a Hollywood Backlot Brawl which is exactly what it sounds like: stupid.

Goldust vs. Roddy Piper

This was taped earlier in the day. Goldust shows up in a gold Cadillac while Piper has a ball bat in hands. Naturally he puts that down and sprays the car with a fire hose. When the power of WATER doesn’t stop a large car, Roddy breaks through the windows with the bat. Piper beats up Goldust with the bat and some stiff looking shots with fists and various metal objects.

Goldust gets sprayed with the hose and rammed into the hood of the car. There’s a knee drop from Piper which mainly hits car followed by a LOUD punch. A low blow stops Piper so Goldie gets in the car and runs over a stuntman in a Piper costume. Goldust drives away so Piper steals a white Ford Bronco and we get a car chase which we’ll return to later. I’ll save the rating for the end of part two later on.

Steve Austin vs. Savio Vega

Austin debuted late last year and is the Million Dollar Champion at this point. Savio was Austin’s first feud in the WWF, which says a lot about how far Stone Cold would jump up the card in just a year. Savio says he’s ready. Vega pounds away to start and they brawl to the floor. Back in and Austin gets in a shot to the face before sending Savio’s shoulder into the post. This is back when Austin could MOVE as he didn’t have a bad neck so the offense is very different. He’s also ripped with well defined abs.

Austin cranks on the arm but Savio backflips out and hits a superkick for two. Roddy calls in and says he’s not letting it end this way. Savio goes shoulder first into the post again and we lose Piper. What a shame. We hit the armbar as Austin is in full control. There’s a hammerlock slam as Piper is back on the phone and talking about beating Goldust up in Tijuana. Vega comes back with a fast cross body for two but Austin comes back with the Thesz Press which doesn’t mean anything for him yet.

We go split screen to show “Piper” chasing Goldust in the Cadillac. This is from the air because clearly a helicopter is available in 10 minutes’ notice. This is supposed to be a parody of the O.J. Simpson car chase, which was only two years earlier. Austin goes up top (I told you he was different) but jumps into a boot. There’s a clothesline to put Austin down but a spinwheel kick hits the referee by mistake. DiBiase slides in the Million Dollar Belt and Vega is KO’d. Another shot to the back of the head and a chinlock of all things are enough for Austin to get the win.

Rating: C+. Bad Piper references aside, this was pretty solid stuff. Austin was AWESOME back in the day before he had to basically invent the brawling style that he made famous. Vega wasn’t much out there, but at least he was good enough to make Austin look solid. This was a fun match, but again no one cared because the main event and one other match are all that matter.

More car chase stuff. Vince: “This footage looks awfully familiar.”

We recap the Undertaker’s mind games with Diesel lately that set up the other big match tonight. Diesel says Undertaker is a big obstacle but he doesn’t sweat the big things.

More car chase stuff.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Ultimate Warrior

HHH debuts Sable as his latest good looking valet. This is Warrior’s latest return and the story was he might weigh 400lbs and be bald. Warrior of course is fine and the fans go nuts for him. Warrior’s entrance is far longer than the match. HHH jumps Warrior before he takes his coat off and and actually hits the Pedigree. That goes nowhere though as Warrior is on his feet at the same time HHH is. Clotheslines, shoulder blocks, press slam and splash mean we’re done. The match didn’t even last two minutes.

We go to the back and meet the debuting Marc Mero. He talks about being glad to be here when HHH comes up (with Mero’s real life wife Sable) and a brawl erupts.

Piper is on his way back to the arena.

Diesel vs. Undetaker

So Diesel cost Undertaker a title match so Undertaker pulled Diesel through the ring during a cage match for the title against Bret. Then Taker did his usual mind games against Diesel, setting up this battle of the titans. Diesel jumps him to start and the brawl is on fast. Taker clotheslines him down but misses an elbow drop. They fight to the floor with Diesel going face first into the steps. This is fast paced stuff so far.

Back in and Diesel avoids Old School, only to get stunned on the top rope. We head back to the floor where Undertaker’s chair shot hits the post instead of Diesel. Diesel rams him back first into the post and then does it again for good measure. Back in again and Diesel slows things up by punching Taker in the face a few times. Snake Eyes (actually called that by Vince) hits and there’s the running crotch attack in 619 position to Undertaker.

The Dead Man starts slugging back and they both hit big boots to put each other down. Taker sits up first but Diesel hits him in the back to get control again. Off to the bear hug that you knew was coming sooner or later. Taker finally fights out of it and things slow down again. Notice that the fans are into this one, unlike anything in the first hour of the show. Taker hits a clothesline off the top for a somewhat delayed two count.

Out of nowhere Diesel hits the Jackknife but he can’t follow up. Actually he can but he would rather stand around and brag for awhile. Taker sits up so there’s another Jackknife for good measure. Diesel takes forever to cover though and Taker grabs him by the throat. They get to their feet and it looks to be chokeslam time, only for Diesel to break it up with a belly to back suplex. Taker sits up again and there’s the running clothesline. A pretty bad chokeslam puts Diesel down and the Tombstone makes Undertaker 5-0.

Rating: B-. For what it was, this was pretty solid stuff. Undertaker looked better than he usually does and it was really in doubt if he could hang with someone that had just come off a year long world title reign. This was probably the turning point for the Dead Man from monster of the week slayer to big time threat to anyone. He would soon be tested by a debuting Mankind, which would change his career forever.

Goldie and Piper get back to the arena so let’s get this over with. Goldust is back first and is exhausted from the driving. He and Piper stumble into the arena so I guess the “match” has been going on for an hour now.

Roddy Piper vs. Goldust

Note that the Hollywood Backlot Brawl is now a wrestling match in a ring in Anaheim. There’s no referee or anything so they’re just going to fight until it ends. Goldust pounds away and hits some shots to Piper’s leg followed by a low blow. There goes Piper’s shirt as you would expect it to. Goldust mounds him and starts pounding away but an attempt at kissing Piper makes the Hot Scot fire back.

Goldie goes up top but gets crotched down again. From his seat on the top rope though, he grabs Piper and kisses him, sending Piper into a frenzy. The fight is on and Piper, the apparent homophobe, grabs Goldust by the crotch. Goldust gets his own clothes ripped off and Piper kisses him. Well sure why not. Anyway Goldust is wearing either women’s lingerie or some kind of S&M stuff so he bails, giving this to Piper.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling so no rating, but I think you can figure out what I thought of it. Goldust, who was Intercontinental Champion at this point, would feud with various midcarders before getting beaten up by Ahmed Johnson for awhile. Piper would be gone like the next day and in WCW in six months.

We recap Michaels vs. Hart which is about two different paths to get to the top of the world. The question is about who is the best, so we’re going to find out in the hour long Iron Man Match.

Shawn says this is about getting to the top of the mountain.

Bret says everything has come to this point and he wants to wake up the next day with the belt.

Gorilla Monsoon is officially in charge again, taking over from Piper.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

In the famous opening, Shawn’s manager/trainer Jose Lothario comes to the ring alone. He gets on the bottom rope and points to the rafters where a spotlight shines. It’s Shawn, dancing atop the rafters and ziplining down into the crowd. The shot from behind him with the flashbulbs going off was one of the most shown visuals in company history for a long time. Bret just walks to the ring because he’s a bit more laid back. Of course this is an Iron Man Match lasting one hour, most falls in that amount of time wins.

Earl Hebner is the referee because there’s no one else that it could be. He reads the full rules to both guys which is pretty cool to hear actually. Vince says that whoever wins the first decision will win the match. It likely helps that he picked the winner. Feeling out process to start with both guys being tentative to get into anything of note. Granted they’re also likely conserving energy.

Shawn easily escapes a pair of headlocks and they trade some more technical stuff. First bit of psychology: Bret blocks a third try at the same headlock counter that Shawn used both times earlier. We head to the mat with the champion in control via a headlock. Shawn fights up and we get a nice technical sequence resulting in Bret being right back in control with a headlock. Off to a front facelock as the announcers debate which man is stronger. That’s a good question actually.

Back to the headlock which is smart this early in a match like this. Shawn gets up again and fires off some armdrags before hooking an armbar. Freddie Blassie and Stu Hart are in the front row. They run the ropes a few times until Bret takes it back to the mat, only to be caught in a kind of abdominal stretch on the mat. They go into the corner and Shawn fires off some right hands, only to be sent into the other corner. Shawn is cool with that as he sends Bret to the floor with a headscissors. Fifty minutes left.

Back in and Shawn puts on an armbar but Bret throws him over the top. It’s Shawn though so he skins the cat and hooks the armbar again to put Bret down. Bret comes back with a shot to the ribs and a headbutt to the abdomen to take over. Off to a chinlock for a bit but Michaels escapes with a jawbreaker. There’s a Fujiwara Armbar on the champ but Bret nips up and catches Shawn in a kind of spinebuster.

The Sharpshooter doesn’t work though so he clotheslines Shawn to the floor. The fans aren’t sure what to think of that. Bret heads to the floor and gets sent into the post which makes him stagger into the timekeeper. We’ve got 45 minutes left as Shawn misses Sweet Chin Music on Bret, hitting the timekeeper by mistake and knocking him out cold. Back in and Bret hooks another chinlock as the timekeeper gets stretchered out.

As the chinlock goes on for almost three minutes we see the problem with this match: it doesn’t need to be an Iron Man Match. Yeah it’s kind of cool that it did went an hour but it would have been fine as a regular match that went like 45 minutes or something like that. The drama would have been better too and we wouldn’t have long rest holds like this. I can’t blame the wrestlers for resting like that as it’s not fair to ask them to go nuts for an hour, but it doesn’t make for the most interesting TV in the world.

Shawn finally gets up but can’t get an O’Connor Roll. Instead he hits a dropkick and grabs another armbar to take Bret down. Shawn cranks on the arm even harder with 40 minutes to go. Now we hit the hammerlock as the crowd is pretty silent. Back up and Shawn sends Bret’s shoulder into the post to give him the biggest advantage yet. There’s a shoulderbreaker to the champion followed by a double ax from the middle rope to the shoulder.

Bret starts firing off punches but Shawn comes back with a DDT on the arm. There’s a cross armbreaker but Shawn breaks it after one pull. Now it goes on full but Bret fights up and rakes his boot across Shawn’s face to break the hold. That’s rather heelish no? Back to the armbar but Hart counters into a kind of middle rope hot shot. Shawn fights back but misses a Stinger Splash in the corner, giving Bret his first advantage in a long time.

The bulldog puts Shawn down so Bret goes up top. That’s an odd sight for him and Shawn tries to slam him down, only to get pulled down to the mat by his hair. Bret hit the referee on the way down and we’re at halftime. Shawn comes back with a powerslam for two but a backdrop attempt is countered into a piledriver which gets two for the champion. Bret goes up again but gets slammed down.

Michaels starts speeding things up with a standing hurricanrana but Bret hangs onto the ropes to avoid the superkick. A backbreaker gets two for Shawn but Hart bails to the floor to avoid the kick again. Instead Shawn goes up and hits a HUGE dive to the floor to take the champ down. Back in and Shawn skins the cat, only to get caught in a small package for two. A Perfectplex gets two for Shawn and he hooks a sleeper. Hart gets his arm up on the second drop so Shawn rams him into the corner again.

Michaels charges at Bret but gets backdropped up and over the post and out to the floor in a great looking crash. Bret goes out to get him though which isn’t the brightest idea in the world. Back in and Bret works over Shawn’s injured back before dropping a leg for no cover. We’ve got twenty minutes left and Bret stomps away on the back. Shawn is flipped upside down in the corner and there’s a belly to back superplex for a close two.

We hit the camel clutch for a few minutes before Shawn fights up again. Hart tries a superplex but has to settle for punching a jumping Shawn in the ribs. Michaels gets whipped into the corner and it’s a Flair Flip to the floor where Shawn accidentally kicks Jose in the head. Out to the floor and Bret whips Shawn into the steps, knocking Jose down again. We head back inside with fifteen minutes to go.

A belly to belly suplex gets two for Bret so it’s time for a slugout. An O’Connor roll doesn’t work for Shawn as Bret kicks him out to the floor on the kickout. A suicide dive takes Shawn down again and we’ve got twelve minutes left. Back in again and Bret hits a German suplex for two. They slug it out but Shawn can’t hang with Bret at this point. Hart is too exhausted to follow up though so it’s back to the camel clutch.

Ten minutes to go now and the camel clutch eats up about two of that. It’s off to a regular chinlock with eight minutes to go and Shawn fights up. They clothesline each other down and more time is being burned up. A superplex puts Shawn down again but he STILL manages to block the Sharpshooter. Hart settles for a half crab as the punishment on the back continues. Shawn makes a rope but gets taken down by a backbreaker with five minutes to go.

Bret loads up his middle rope elbow but jumps into a boot to put both guys down again. A dropkick puts Bret in the corner as Shawn gets his nineteenth win according to Shawn. Four minutes to go now. There’s the flying forearm and the nip up (the camera misses it) as Shawn picks up the speed. A jumping back elbow puts Hart down and a top rope spinning ax handle gets two. The top rope elbow hits with two and a half minutes left. A good looking gutwrench powerbomb gets no cover with two minutes to go.

Shawn busts out a moonsault press for two as Bret is trying to hang on. Ninety seconds left and Shawn hits a middle rope rana for two more. Shawn slams him down and goes up top but he can’t follow up with a minute left. Shawn tries another rana but jumps into the Sharpshooter with thirty three seconds left in the match. The place is going NUTS but Shawn amazingly holds out until the time limit expires.

BUT WAIT!

As Bret leaves, Gorilla Monsoon orders the match to continue under sudden death rules. As Bret puts it: why? This was never agreed to and Bret is indeed getting screwed here. The bell rings and Bret is TICKED. He goes after Shawn’s back and hits a big backdrop. Bret whips Shawn into the corner, and in one of two moments that made me jump to my feet when I was watching it live, Shawn jumps over Bret out of the corner and hits Sweet Chin Music to put both guys down. Michaels gets up, tunes up the band, and kicks Bret’s head off for the pin and his first world title.

Rating: B. After an hour and five minutes of this match, there’s one word that can sum it up: LONG. That’s the problem here: it did not need to be an hour long and would have been much better suited as a regular one on one match. Either that or have a few falls in between, as having it be one very long glorified one on one match makes the stipulation seem pretty lame. The psychology is good though and it’s not a bad match by any means. It just could have had over 20 minutes cut out and you could have had the same match, and that’s not a good sign. Oh and what happened to Bret’s shoulder injury?

Bret, ever the mature one, storms off like a baby with the ability to walk as Shawn is awarded the title. Shawn has a very touching moment when he realizes he finally won the title and is very somber. Then he turns into Shawn and goes nuts celebrating which he deserves the right to do.

Overall Rating: C+. The show isn’t terrible but the main problem is that it’s almost a one match show. Now to be fair there’s a five match card (not counting the brawl) and two of the matches are quite good, but the problem is that this was basically a four man show. It’s certainly not terrible, but it feels incomplete due to one match being about half the show. Bret vs. Shawn is worth seeing, but make sure you have a remote in your hand.

Ratings Comparison

Camp Cornette vs. Yokozuna/Jake Roberts/Ahmed Johnson

Original: D+

Redo: C

Steve Austin vs. Savio Vega

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Diesel

Original: B

Redo: B-

Roddy Piper vs. Goldust

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: C+

I guess it gets better over time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/19/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-12-one-really-long-match-and-not-much-else/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

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Wrestlemania XI
Date: April 2, 1995
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,305
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

This is one of the dark Wrestlemanias in that it was a very bad time for the company. That being said, the show was very well received and wound up being kind of a saving grace for the WWF. The main events are Diesel defending the title against Shawn (shocking I know) and Bam Bam Bigelow vs. NFL Hall of Famer (not at this point though) Lawrence Taylor. Let’s get to it.

We open with clips from every Wrestlemania. That’s a nice idea, especially for back then when you can do this in 90 seconds. Today it would take way too long. Apparently Pamela Anderson, Jenny McCarthy and others are starring in this show. Good to know indeed.

A special Olympian sings America the Beautiful. Nothing wrong with that.

Allied Powers vs. Blu Brothers

I don’t remember if Allied Powers was their official name but it’s Luger/British Bulldog. The Brothers are whatever name you best know the Harris Brothers by, which is most likely the DOA. The timing of this redo is perfect, as their manager is Uncle Zebekiah, who is currently Zeb Colter, manager of Jack Swagger. It’s a big brawl to start and the good guys hit stereo powerslams to take over. Bulldog and we’ll say Jacob (partner of Eli) start and there’s the delayed vertical after only a few seconds.

Off to a headlock by the Brit as Vince sounds like he’s in an auditorium for some reason. The Brothers take over with heel power moves and it’s off to Eli for a side slam. A double big boot from the twins puts Bulldog right back down but Bulldog starts firing off right hands. With the referee holding the Bulldog back, the Brothers pull a switch but they switch back just a few seconds later. That’s some high quality leadership there Zeb.

We’ll say Jacob takes too much time on a middle rope elbow so the British guy moves. Hot tag brings in Luger and house is cleaned. There’s a powerslam and the steel forearm smash gets two. Zebekiah interferes and the twins switch again, allowing Eli to kick out of the forearm which didn’t hit him. Not that it matters as British hits a sunset flip for the pin out of nowhere. Not that he was legal or anything but who cares?

Rating: C-. This match uh…..exists I guess. Seriously that’s all I’ve got here. It wasn’t a good match or anything but I’ve seen worse. That’s the problem here: it’s so average that it’s barely worth talking about. Luger would be gone in a few months back to WCW, which was the best move as he was doing stuff like this for the next six months or so. Nothing to see here at all and a really odd choice for a match and especially the opener.

Apparently that win deserves fireworks. If that’s the high point of the show, we’re in BIG trouble.

Zebekiah demands justice because the wrong Blu got pinned.

Nicholas Turturro is supposed to interview Pamela Anderson but we have audio difficulties.

Lawler explains football: it’s just like the post office. “Eleven guys spend an hour trying to move a small object 100 yards.” Andy Griffith he is not.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Jarrett, the champion, has a manager here named The Roadie who would become Jesse James, making this the ultimate battle of the double initials. This is a rematch from the Rumble where Ramon got counted out but agreed to come back in where he lost the title when his knee gave out. The 1-2-3 Kid is with Razor to counteract the Roadie. Razor decks Jeff to start and the champion immediately heads to the floor. That’s nice of him as it allows Razor’s pyro to go off.

A big right hand takes Jarrett down and Razor clotheslines him out to the floor for good measure. Back in and a sunset flip out of the corner by the champion is blocked by a right hand. Ramon keeps up his barrage of punches by faking Jarrett out and punching him even more. Roadie bails Jarrett out of the Razor’s Edge and the champion regroups a bit on the floor.

Back inside and Roadie cheats a bit with some choking, only to have Jeff miss a charge and land on him. All Razor so far. Back in again and Jarrett hits a swinging neckbreaker and some dropkicks to take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit before things speed up with both guys getting near falls. Jarrett hooks a sleeper that lasts even less time than the chinlock so Jeff punches him down and hooks another chinlock.

Razor escapes again via a suplex but both guys are down. They get up at the same time and collide to put them down again. That’s a bit of overkill but whatever. Again they get up and a double punch puts them down for a third time. Ramon comes back with more punches and they actually stay up for once. A fallaway slam gets two and there’s the discus punch to put Jarrett down again. The Kid tries to interfere but gets kicked into the barricade.

Razor loads up his middle rope bulldog but misses and lands on his bad knee. The Figure Four goes on and Razor is in trouble. After some interference from Roadie, Ramon turns the hold over but Jeff quickly lets it go. Ramon hits a quick belly to back superplex to put Jarret down and it’s time for the Edge, which draws in Roadie for the DQ.

Rating: C. This match was mainly punches but Razor was so insanely over the he carried the crowd. Jarrett was pretty dull at this point but he would reach all new levels of dull later on in WCW. Razor would finally get the title back in a ladder match on a house show in May, but it would only last for two days. The match here was ok but nothing worth seeing. It was better than the first match though.

Post match Jarrett puts the Kid in the Figure Four.

Jarrett says that was perfectly good conduct for a champion.

Turturro is with Jenny McCarthy and nothing of note is said. Pamela Anderson is nowhere to be seen but Shawn pops in to say nothing is wrong. Team DiBiase is behind them planning for later. Sid says Diesel is going down tonight.

King Kong Bundy vs. Undertaker

This is part of the never ending Undertaker vs. Million Dollar Corporation feud. The Corporation stole the Urn at the Rumble and tonight is about revenge and getting the Urn back. Before Taker comes out, Todd Pettingil talks to some football player. The referee is a Major League umpire who is moonlighting because MLB is on strike. Undertaker stares at DiBiase before the bell and Ted drops the Urn.

Taker pounds away to start and hits Young School but he can’t drop Bundy. The jumping clothesline finally puts him down but Bundy knocks him over the top to the floor in retaliation. Taker lands on his feet right in front of DiBiase and takes the Urn back from him. Paul Bearer gets the Urn back but Kama Mustafa (Godfather) comes out to steal the Urn back. This is like a bad comedy.

Taker tries to stop the theft but Bundy jumps the Dead Man, allowing Kama to get it. He says he’s going to melt it down and make it a necklace. Bundy pounds on Taker a bit and slams him down before getting two off a knee drop. We hit the fat man chinlock fot a bit before Taker fights up, only to get caught by the Avalanche in the corner. No selling is done today, and it’s a slam and the jumping clothesline to make Taker 4-0.

Rating: D. This was nothing but a formality for Undertaker as we continue the Urn stealing story for even longer. Bundy was worthless here, other than some long forgotten star power. This feud kept going and never got interesting at all since DiBiase’s team was all lame power guys. Nothing to see here and probably Undertaker’s least interesting Mania match ever.

Turturro still can’t find Pamela Anderson. Instead he finds Lawrence Taylor’s All-Pro team of football players who are here to counter the Million Dollar Team. One of these guys is Mongo, future US Champion. Turturro moves on to find Bob Backlund playing chess with Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Backlund goes nuts when he hears Anderson is missing because he has no idea who she is.

Thomas (a 12 year old actor from Home Improvement at the time) checkmates him so Backlund accuses him of taking advantage of his elders. Backlund asks him three questions (who was the 34^th President, what is the capital of Honduras, and who is Chief Justice of the Supreme Court) which Thomas answers correctly. Backlund: “THAT’S THE TROUBLE WITH YOUTH TODAY!!! THEY THINK THEY KNOW EVERTHING!!!” Crazy Backlund was GOLD.

Tag Titles: Owen Hart/??? vs. Smoking Gunns

Owen introduces Yokozuna as his mystery partner. The Gunns are defending here and say they’ll win. Owen and Billy start things off with Hart trying to speed things up. That goes badly for him as Billy slaps him in the face and brings in Bart to work on the arm. Owen fights back though and brings in Yoko who misses an elbow drop. Back to Owen as we’re firmly in the Colossal Connection formula (Owen does the wrestling, Yoko comes in for a few seconds to destroy whoever he’s fighting).

The Gunns hit a double legsweep on Hart and a double flapjack gets two. Owen finally escapes a backdrop attempt and brings in Yoko. Billy gets taken down and sat on, giving the foreigners control. Off to a nerve hold which hopefully doesn’t last as long as the ones last year did. After we kill a minute or so in the hold, Owen loads up a missile dropkick but hits his partner by mistake. There’s the hot tag to Bart and house is cleaned, but Billy walks into a belly to belly suplex. The Banzai Drop hits but Bart breaks up the pin. Not that it really matters though as Owen covers Billy for the pin and the title, Owen’s first in the company.

Rating: C-. Another decent but lackluster match here which is the theme of this show. The Gunns losing was definitely the right call as Owen and Yoko made for dominant champions for several months. Other than that though, the match was boring stuff overall. Owen finally getting a title was a good moment though.

Bam Bam Bigelow is in the back and we look at the history between him and Taylor. At the Rumble, Bigelow lost in the finals of a tag title tournament and Taylor laughed at him. Bigelow shoved him and Wrestlemania was made. Bigelow doesn’t have anything significant to say here. For some reason Todd Pettingil has headphones on here, presumably because of the audio difficulties. Apparently Lawler accidentally kicked some cords out and the commentary had to be re-recorded later. Maybe that’s what’s going on.

Bret Hart vs. Bob Backlund

This is an I Quit match with Roddy Piper as guest referee. They had a previous I Quit match at Survivor Series which wound up being pretty awesome as an old school style match that ran about thirty five minutes. Thanks to Owen cheating, Backlund won the title and shocked the world, so tonight is about revenge for Hart. Piper is here for no apparent reason whatsoever.

Bret pounds away to start and sends Backlund hard into the corner. An early Sharpshooter attempt is blocked so Bret drops an elbow. Bret keeps pounding on him and Piper asks if Backlund quits way too often. Another Sharpshooter attempt doesn’t work so here’s a Figure Four by Bret instead. Backlund turns it over but Bret lets go before it goes badly for him.

Off to a leg lock by Hart as the match slows down a bit. We hear about Bret hating Japanese people which was an angle that didn’t go anywhere. Backlund grabs at Bret’s face to escape before finally just kicking Hart in the face. Bob starts going after the arm but Bret avoids the chickenwing. Instead it’s a Fujiwara Armbar and the fans are getting restless. Bob pounds on the arm even more with an armbar as Piper asks Bret if he gives up for about the dozenth time.

Bret finally fights back and hits the backbreaker and middle rope elbow. The Sharpshooter doesn’t work but Bret misses a charge into the corner, going shoulder first into the post. Bob hooks the chickenwing but Bret reverses into one of his own. Backlund yells incoherently which apparently counts as a submission, giving Bret the win.

Rating: D+. I love the original version of this but the rematch didn’t work at all. For one thing, a match about making someone quit with guys of this caliber should probably be longer than ten minutes. On top of that, it was really dull stuff. This didn’t work at all and even Bret has said it’s one of his least favorite matches ever.

Backlund says he saw the light and looks crazier than usual.

Pamela Anderson is nowhere to be found so changes have been made. Ok then.

Diesel says something that I can’t understand because the audio keeps messing up. This is getting REALLY annoying. The audio is fixed long enough for Diesel to say nothing of note.

Jonathan Taylor Thomas comes out to be timekeeper for the title match. Turturro is ring announcer because we haven’t seen him enough tonight. At least he seems excited to be here though.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel

Diesel is defending and Jenny McCarthy comes out with Shawn. Pam Anderson comes out with Diesel to tick Shawn off, even though I thought McCarthy looked better. Shawn tries to jump Diesel but gets backdropped to the floor so Anderson can come in and pose. We actually get going and Shawn is dropped by a right hand. Diesel beals him out of the corner and Shawn is in trouble early.

A big backdrop puts Shawn down and Diesel throws him out to the floor. It’s time to stall until Sid distracts Diesel. That doesn’t work either as Diesel blasts Shawn coming in. Shawn pounds away in the corner but gets shoved away like he’s not even there. A suplex puts Shawn down and Diesel easily throws him out to the floor. Sid’s latest attempt at a distraction lets Shawn get in a few punches and gain brief control.

Diesel is thrown to the floor but Shawn skins the cat to stay alive. A BIG dive off the top takes Diesel down and a baseball slide keeps him down. Shawn tries another baseball slide but Diesel steps to the side, only to accidentally ram himself ribs first into the post. A Sid chant breaks out as Shawn hits a running splash off the apron. They get back in as Sid and Hebner get in an argument which goes nowhere.

Shawn stays on the ribs before getting two off a middle rope bulldog. Back to the injured back/ribs of Diesel we go as the fans are behind Shawn now. A top rope elbow hits the back for two. The champ counters a front facelock into a backdrop and there’s a second one. Shawn sends him into the buckle to slow Diesel down again and there’s a sleeper. The champ escapes and hits a corner clothesline followed by Snake Eyes.

We head to the floor for a second time and Diesel wins a quick slugout. Sid tries to interfere and does nothing at all so we head back inside for a superkick. The referee has hurt his ankle (has there ever been a more prone to injury referee than Earl Hebner? He’s ALWAYS getting hurt) so the kick only gets two. Sid rips a buckle pad off but Diesel suplexes Shawn down before he can do anything about it.

They’re both down now as Hebner’s ankle is strong enough for him to stand up now. Shawn goes to the middle rope for something resembling a dropkick but jumps into a side slam. That was a cool looking catch. Diesel still can’t follow up because of the ribs but he manages to scoop Shawn’s legs out and launch him into (the buckle below) the exposed buckle. A big boot and the Jackknife retain the title as Anderson asks someone if she’s supposed to be clapping now.

Rating: B. It’s good but somehow this won Match of the Year in PWI. For the life of me I have no idea how as it’s not even Shawn’s best match of the year. The rematch would be MUCH better with a typical David vs. Goliath formula. The lack of such a formula here was weird as Diesel, the 7’0 monster, was the underdog. Shawn would turn face very soon after this.

Diesel celebrates with all the celebrities.

Shawn goes on a rant (calling the superkick Chin Music, perhaps for the first time but I’m not sure) about how the referee being hurt cost him the title.

The Million Dollar Team is introduced for the main event: Bundy, Tatanka, Nikolai Volkoff, Kama, I.R.S. and DiBiase himself. We also get the NFL All-Pro Team: Ken Norton, Chris Speilman, Rickey Jackson, Carl Banks, Steve McMichael and Reggie White.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Lawrence Taylor

R&B group Salt N Peppa sings What A Man live for Taylor’s entrance. Pat Patterson is guest referee to make sure things go as smoothly as possible. Taylor is a legit NFL superstar so this is an actual big deal as far as celebrities go. There are a TON of reporters and photographers at ringside plus the two teams so it looks like a lumberjack match. Before the bell, Taylor SMACKS Bigelow in the face and we’re ready to go. Oh and Diesel has been training with Taylor. Remember that.

A big forearm immediately puts Bigelow down and a clothesline puts him on the floor. The crowd is losing it over this stuff as Taylor looks GREAT. Back in and a bulldog (decent one too) gets two for Taylor. There’s a hip toss and Bigelow needs a breather. In two minutes, Taylor has already showed more skill and fire than McMichael showed in two and a half years in WCW. Lawrence follows him to the floor and a big brawl almost starts between the teams.

Back in and Bigelow gets in some shots to take over including a headbutt. A falling headbutt misses so Taylor fires off a big forearm to take Bigelow down. Bam Bam pounds him right back down and puts on a Boston crab which almost immediately shifts into a half crab. It breaks down even further into Bigelow just pulling on one leg. Now he just leans on it instead of cranking on it.

Taylor fights up again and hits a suplex of all things to give himself a breather. It’s a quick breather though as Bigelow pounds away even more. There’s Bigelow’s moonsault but he “hurts” his knee in the process. Lawrence kicks out at two (ZERO reaction for the crowd for some reason) and it’s time for a comeback. Bigelow ducks his head so Taylor tries something resembling a suplex that was supposed to be a Jackknife.

Bigelow misses an enziguri but Taylor falls down anyway. The top rope headbutt gets another two and the crowd reacts a bit. Taylor gets his last gasp of energy though and pounds Bigelow in the corner before hitting a pair of big forearms. A third from the middle rope is enough for the shocking upset.

Rating: B. All things considered, this was nothing short of a miracle. Keeping in mind that Taylor had zero experience coming in there, he looked amazing. They didn’t have most of the problems that most celebrity matches have as Taylor looked like he had actual talent instead of looking like he needed someone to walk him through everything. As a regular match this wasn’t much, but all things considered this was great.

Taylor can barely stand up post match and the team has to help him back. DiBiase goes on a rant to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. You often hear how terrible this show is but it really isn’t that bad. It’s terribly boring and uninteresting for the most part, but there are FAR worse shows out there. The other major problem this show has is that it’s a Wrestlemania. If this show was something like In Your House or even Summerslam it wouldn’t have nearly the bad reputation it does. It’s certainly not good or even decent but it’s FAR better than it’s given credit for.

Ratings Comparison

Allied Powers vs. Blu Brothers

Original: D

Redo: C-

Razor Ramon vs. Jeff Jarrett

Original: D+

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. King Kong Bundy

Original: F+

Redo: D

Owen Hart/Yokozuna vs. Smoking Gunns

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Original: F+

Redo: D+

Diesel vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B

Redo: B

Lawrence Taylor vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: D+

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: F+

Redo: D+

Man alive what was bugging me when I watched it the first time? It’s not THAT bad.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/18/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-11-just-get-it-over-with/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania X
Date: March 20, 1994
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,065
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

Anyone that has read my stuff over the years knows that I believe Wrestlemania X7 to be the undisputed best show ever. This is one of the small handful of shows that I actually think about for awhile before saying X7 is better. On this show are two of the best matches of all time and two world title matches, all without Hogan. This show feels like a major show and it more than lives up to the hype. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from the first Wrestlemania. That still holds up to this day.

Little Richard and a choir sing America the Beautiful. The first version is just Richard but the choir kicks in on the second one, making for an awesome performance.

We recap Bret vs. Owen. Expect to hear the words “we recap” a lot tonight, because there is A LOT of backstory to this show. Back in mid to late 1993, Owen was getting annoyed at Bret getting all of the spotlight, but he went along with Bret and two more brothers on a Survivor Series team against Shawn Michaels and the Knights. The Knights were easily dispatched, but late in the match Owen was knocked into Bret, sending the elder brother (Bret) into the barricade. As his family went to check on him, Owen was rolled up and pinned, making him the only Hart to be eliminated.

This sent Owen into a tirade about how Bret was always hogging the spotlight. Owen challenged Bret to a match but Bret said no way. Instead, Bret offered to team up with Owen to win the tag titles, which was enough to appease Owen. At the Royal Rumble during the title shot, Bret injured his knee and refused to tag late in the match, causing the referee to stop the match due to the injury. Owen finally snapped and kicked Bret’s bad leg out from under him, fully turning heel in an awesome and totally justified moment.

Later in the night, Bret was in the Royal Rumble. He and Lex Luger were the last two men in the match and they both went out at the same time. No one could tell who hit the ground first, so they were declared co-winners. Therefore, both guys get title matches tonight. A coin toss was determined who would get the first shot at champion Yokozuna, which was won by Lex. Therefore, Lex gets a title shot first tonight, but Bret has to face suitable competition so he doesn’t get an unfair advantage in the later match. His opponent is his brother Owen (Luger would have faced Crush is Bret had won the toss). Got all that?

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

For reasons I’m not clear on, the Fink isn’t the announcer tonight. They lock up to start and Owen shoves Bret away, earning himself some celebrating. Bret takes him down to the mat but Owen escapes and celebrates again. Back to the mat for some amateur stuff but Owen grabs the rope. Owen tries to take it to the mat but Bret easily counters to send him out to the floor. Back in and Owen slaps him in the face to fire up his older brother.

More amateur stuff ensues and Owen gets to do his spinning counter to a wristlock, only to pull Bret down by the hair. Bret channels his inner Shawn and nips up before getting two off a rollup. Bret takes over with an armbar and a clothesline to send Owen out to the floor. Back in again and Bret slaps the blonde Hart before rolling him up for two. Bret hooks the armbar again before getting two off a crucifix. We’re about five minutes into this now and there is absolutely nothing to complain about. They get up again and Owen hits a sweet spinwheel kick to take over before stomping Bret to the floor.

Owen rams Bret back first into the post as the anger is starting to seep out. A backbreaker sets up a camel clutch back inside as Lawler is loving this. Owen yells at his brother in a great touch to the evilness. Bret breaks it pretty quickly but walks into a belly to belly suplex for two. A cross body by Owen is rolled through by Bret for two but Owen goes straight to the back again. Owen hits a German suplex for two and drops a leg on the back of Bret’s head for two more.

Bret tries to spin out of a suplex but gets caught in a tombstone. Owen goes up top but misses a swan dive, giving Bret the breather that he’s been needing. Bret starts firing back and gets two each off a clothesline and a Russian legsweep. There’s the backbreaker followed by the middle rope elbow for two more. It’s Sharpshooter time but Owen pops up and hits the enziguri to put Bret down.

Another Sharpshooter attempt is countered by Owen and a rollup gets two on Bret. This is very fast paced stuff. Owen heads to the floor and we get LUCHA BRET as he takes out his brother. He hurts his knee in the process though and Owen is very happy. Back inside and Owen goes for the leg, wrapping it around the post a few times because that’s what villains do. Off to an inverted Indian Deathlock by Owen but he lets it go before too long.

There’s a yet to be named dragon screw leg whip followed by a Figure Four (wrong leg of course) as Bret is in big trouble. Bret reverses and rolls into the ropes to break the hold but his knee is gone. An enziguri finally puts Owen down and buys big brother a breather. A headbutt puts Owen down again and there’s the chest first into the buckle bump for Owen. A bulldog gets two on Owen as does a sweet piledriver.

There’s a superplex for a delayed two as Jerry Lawler is freaking out. A sleeper is quickly broken up by a hidden low blow from Owen and it’s time for the Sharpshooter on Bret. The older Hart slaps the mat but it doesn’t mean anything yet. Bret reverses into a Sharpshooter of his own but Owen is right in front of the ropes. Owen charges into a boot in the corner so Bret loads up a rollup, but Owen counters into a cradle for the 100% clean pin.

Rating: A+. If there’s a better opening match anywhere, I’d love to see it. This was Owen’s coming out party and he looked excellent in doing it. Bret has no shame in losing here as he didn’t so much get beat as much as he got caught. This set up a great feud over the summer for the title between these two, but it never reached this level again. There was some DEEP psychology going on out there with Bret being hesitant to fight his brother and Owen using the advantage to catch Bret in a wrestling move, all on top of the leg injury. Excellent match and one of the best ever.

Owen says he told us all he could do it and he’s absolutely right.

We look at the Wrestlemania II battle royal.

Sy Sperling of the Hair Club for Men debuts a hairpiece for Fink. I’m thinking no on this one Howard.

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Bigelow runs over Doink to start with a clothesline and a dropkick to silence the crowd. A headbutt misses though and the Clown pounds away a bit. Bigelow misses an elbow drop and it’s off to Dink, meaning Luna has to come in as well. This is your usual “comedy” but Luna does hit a running hip attack in 619 position but Dink starts running around in circles. The small clown goes up top but misses a dive.

Vachon goes up but misses a BIG splash, allowing the big boys to come back in. Doink pounds away but is clotheslined to the floor with one shot. Dink annoys both heels but Doink comes back in, only to be sat on in a sunset flip attempt. A charges misses the big clown though and a jumping DDT puts Bigelow down. The Whoopee Cushion (top rope seated senton) completely misses and Dink is knocked to the floor. Doink tries a suplex but Bigelow falls on him for two. The top rope headbutt is enough to finish off the clowns.

Rating: D. This was bad but not completely terrible. Doink wasn’t doing his stupid comedy and thankfully Bigelow didn’t have to look all that stupid, which is the worst thing they could have done. The match wasn’t much but to be fair they needed something to give the crowd a breather after the awesome opener. This wasn’t horrible.

Bigelow tries to crush Dink but Doink makes the save.

A Bill Clinton impersonator is here. Somehow I.R.S. gets a spot in the presidential box.

Wrestlemania III was awesome!

Randy Savage vs. Crush

This is the result of a big heel turn by Crush where he cost Savage his broadcasting job. The idea was Yokozuna injured Crush but Savage didn’t come visit him, so Crush turned on him. This is a twist on the falls count anywhere match, but the deal is you have to pin someone out of the ring and the pinned guy has 60 seconds to make it back to the ring, making it more like a last man standing match actually. It’s also no holds barred.

Savage charges at Crush in the aisle but gets dropped on the barricade for a pin in about 40 seconds. Of course Savage makes it back in (despite some Fuji interference) but that’s a nice quick introduction to the concept. Savage is put in the Tree of Woe where Crush stomps away. Fuji hands Crush some salt but Randy knocks it into the evil one’s face. A top rope double ax has Crush in trouble and there’s the big elbow, but Savage has to send Crush to the floor before pinning him. Smart indeed. Crush beats the count after Fuji pours some water on his face.

Crush comes back with a kind of hot shot to send Savage to the floor, but Randy immediately comes back by sending Crush into the post. They fight into the crowd where Crush superkicks Savage’s head off. A piledriver doesn’t work on Savage so they fight into the back. Savage rams Crush into various metal objects and gets a pin, but instead of leaving he ties Crush’s feet up with a rope and hangs him upside down. It doesn’t quite work as Crush falls just after Savage leaves, but the clock was running the whole time and Savage wins.

Rating: C. Keeping in mind that this was 1994, this was pretty good. Sixty seconds was too long of an interval as it was too long before the guy was in danger. If they cut it doewn to about thirty, this would have been much better. Either way, not bad here and more proof that Savage was still a very valuable asset to Vince, but for whatever reason (not Stephanie), he was let go.

Fake Clinton says he’s a fan. I.R.S. congratulates him on raising taxes.

We see videos from Fan Fest, which was the forerunner to Axxess.

Savage celebrates with the fans. He also won a tournament for the world title at Wrestlemania IV.

Women’s Title: Lelani Kai vs. Alundra Blayze

Kai was at the first Wrestlemania if that tells you anything. Blayze is the new champion after the belt was resurrected for no apparent reason. Kai, a Hawaiian/something else hybrid, runs Blayze over but gets caught in a sunset flip a few seconds later for two. Lelani comes back with a chokebomb for no cover but a bad splash gets two.

The champ comes back with a hurricanrana before there was a name for such a thing in America. Either way it gets two and we head to the floor. That goes nowhere so Kai hits a butterfly suplex for two. Blayze comes back with some basic strikes and some hair drags for two each. Alundra hits her bridging German suplex to retain a few seconds later.

Rating: D. Was there a point to this? I didn’t think so either so let’s see what was stupid about it. First of all, the “division” had two regulars in it: Blayze and a Japanese monster named Bull Nakano. Based on that, it’s pretty clear why the division was done in just a few months, not to be mentioned again for about four years.

Roddy Piper sprayed a non-celebrity with a fire extinguisher at Mania V.

Tag Titles: Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

The Quebecers are defending and have Johnny Polo with them. About a year later, Polo would become Raven. The Men on a Mission are Mabel (Viscera) and perhaps the most worthless wrestler that I can think of at the moment, Mo. They were purple and gold and rap with their manager Oscar. That’s about it. Before the match, here’s some big chested blonde talk show host for Shawn to hit on. Burt Reynolds, pretty clearly bombed, shows up to steal her. From what I’ve heard, Reynolds was the biggest jerk on the planet backstage at this show.

The Quebecers are the Mountie and another Canadian who dress like Mounties. True story: the Royal Canadian Mounted Police yelled at the WWF and said they had to have their song (it might have been just the Mountie actually. Not that it matters) changed to say “We’re NOT the Mounties” because the RCMP was worried about people believing they were real corrupt Mounties. Wait why am I spending this much space on this match?

Anyway the champions jump the Men before the bell but 500lb+ Mabel runs them oveand brings in Mo. Since Mo is the most worthless wrestler I can think of at this moment, he’s easily beaten down and not many people care. Mo is sent to the floor and Pierre backdrops Jacques over the top and onto the worthless one. Back in and a double hot shot gets two on Mo. This is going nowhere.

Mo comes back with a forward roll attack but the tag isn’t seen. Wait yes it is and Mabel cleans house. The champions try a double suplex on the fat man but hurt their backs in the process. They try it again and actually get it to work as Polo celebrates. Pierre hits the Cannonball (assisted Swanton Bomb) for two and Mabel starts firing back. The Men hit their double splash but there’s no referee. END THIS NONSENSE ALREADY! Mabel splashes Pierre on the floor….and it’s a countout.

Rating: F+. There was no structure, there was no flow, Mo is worthless, Mabel is fat and worthless, the ending sucked, and there was entirely too little Johnny Polo. Was there ANYTHING good about this match? Oh wait the suplex was good. To give you an idea of how bad Men on a Mission were, they accidentally won the titles at a house show around this time as Mabel was too fat to get up on a cover and Jacques couldn’t kick out.

Wrestlemania VI had the Ultimate Challenge.

We do the “celebrities” for the first title match. Basically it’s the aforementioned talk show host and a member of New Kids on the Block. Seriously, that’s it. There’s a guest referee though: Mr. Perfect. Now remember last year when Luger knocked out Mr. Perfect? Well there was never any retribution for that…..but I’m sure it won’t mean anything here right?

WWF World Title: Lex Luger vs. Yokozuna

Yoko is defending of course and there’s also backstory to this. The idea here is that last 4^th of July, Yokozuna held a bodyslam challenge on board the U.S.S. Intrepid. No one could slam him and the contest was closed, but a helicopter landed on the ship and out stepped Lex Luger. He hit a running forearm and slammed Yokozuna to get the biggest face turn in years. He then went around the country on a bus, begging for a title shot because he was MADE IN THE USA.

Anyway, he got the shot at Summerslam with the catch that it was his ONLY shot. Luger did indeed beat Yoko….by countout. Therefore he was frozen out of the title picture, unless he could win the Royal Rumble. We’ve already covered that though so here’s the first title match. Luger gets a bit intro with fireworks, but do you really think New York City is going to cheer him? Especially with BRET HART in the wings? You should know better than that.

Luger pounds away like any AMERICAN hero worth his (certainly not Japanese) salt. A big right hand sends Yoko out to the floor and there’s an ax handle to the back of the head. Luger busts out a freaking TOP ROPE CROSS BODY for two and a jumping elbow for the same. Since it’s early in the match, a slam completely fails and Yoko falls on top for two. Yoko rips a buckle pad off but we hit the nerve hold for a bit instead. Luger fights out of it but Yoko rams into him to stop any comeback.

Back to el nerve hold which has been running for about five minutes total now. Luger fights up but Fuji pulls the rope down to send him to the outside. Back in and BACK TO THE NERVE HOLD. After about 87 years Luger fights up and makes his comeback….only to be knocked down by a chop. Yoko tries to send Luger into Chekov’s buckle but gets sent into it himself of course.

Luger makes his REAL comeback and hits a clothesline to put Yoko down and there’s the “slam” (more like he picked up Yoko and dropped him). The forearm knocks Yoko out but Luger has to beat up Fuji and Cornette. Perfect won’t count so Luger shoves him…AND THAT’S A DQ! Holy screwjob! That’s clearly what the fans are chanting: screwjob, not some other word that starts with s and often comes after holy.

Rating: D+. It’s rare to see Luger as the star of a match but that’s certainly the case here. That nerve hold was RIDICULOUS as it was about 80% of the champion’s “offense”, although a case can be made that he was saving strength for later tonight which is understandable. This was a callback to something that most people didn’t remember, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t fair game. Unfortunately Perfect would injure his back again after this and not be able to payoff this feud. Either way, Luger is officially a choker in the WWF and was done as a world title contender after this.

Luger and Perfect yell at each in the back.

At Wrestlemania VII, Savage and Liz reunited. The moment given here is the Blindfold match but screw that.

Here’s Harvey Wippleman to yell at Fink for having a stupid hairpiece. They get in a shoving match but Adam Bomb comes out to scare Fink. This brings out….EARTHQUAKE?

Adam Bomb vs. Earthquake

This is barely a match as Quake hits his powerslam and the Earthquake gets the pin in less than 40 seconds. This is what you call “being way over time and needing to hurry up.” I’m shocked Earthquake had a job at this point.

Cornette goes on a rant against Lex Luger and cats while also calling Todd Pettingill “Petting Zoo” before yelling about Bret Hart. Then he talks about fish and Bret starting a feeding frenzy of sharks. I could listen to Cornette ramble while still staying on point for HOURS.

The Wrestlemania VIII moment is the Undertaker. Seriously, that’s it. No mention of his match, whether he won or lost, his opponent, or anything shown other than a closeup of him walking to the ring. Just the Undertaker.

Ready for some more backstory? Back in 1993, Shawn Michaels was Intercontinental Champion but failed a drug test. To this day Shawn says he didn’t do it but that’s beside the point. We needed a new champion so Ramon won a battle royal and then a match to win the title. Shawn came back with the original belt and said he never lost, so he was still the champion. The solution? Put both belts on a ladder and let them climb up to pull them down in a classic match that might be the match of the decade.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

Shawn has Diesel with him here. Diesel is told to leave but just doesn’t because that’s the kind of guy he is. Basic stuff to start with Shawn blocking a hip toss but getting chokeslammed instead. They hit the ropes to build some speed and Shawn hits a neckbreaker. Razor gets sent to the floor and there’s a clothesline from Diesel, earning him another ejection which actually works this time.

Anyway Shawn gets punched in the jaw and Razor takes over again. Shawn is knocked into the corner before a BIG clothesline puts him on the floor. Razor exposes the concrete but we head back inside before he can use it. The Razor’s Edge is loaded up but Shawn backdrops Ramon over the top and onto the concrete, possibly injuring an elbow. Shawn gets the ladder but Razor jacks his jaw to stop it. The ladder is slid inside but Shawn hits a baseball slide to knock it into Ramon’s ribs.

Back inside again and the ladder is rammed into Razor’s ribs both in the corner and on the mat. Shawn throws the ladder onto Razor’s back which looks SICK. He tosses it at Razor against the ropes and goes for a climb, only to have Razor pull Shawn’s tights down and give us a rather unpleasant (or pleasant depending on your preferences) view. Not that it matters as Shawn knocks him down and climbs again, this time hitting a pretty famous splash to crush Razor again.

Razor saves another climb by shoving the ladder over, sending Shawn onto the top rope. We get a camera shot from above the ring, showing both guys laid out on the mat. Cool shot. Back up and Michaels is whipped into the ladder in the corner, knocking him out to the floor. Razor rams the ladder into Shawn’s chest with his back against the post. If that’s not enough, Razor launches Shawn into the ladder against the apron to keep Michaels in agony.

Back in and Ramon BLASTS Shawn with the ladder to knock him to the outside again. Razor climbs up but Shawn dives off the top rope to knock him down. The ladder falls onto Shawn in the process to keep both guys on the mat. They both start to climb but the ladder is bent. Shawn is higher up but can’t hang in a slugout with Razor. Michaels gets punched down but the ladder gives way under Razor, sending him down.

Ramon climbs again but Shawn dropkicks the ladder which doesn’t topple over this time. In a smart move, Shawn pushes the ladder over onto Razor’s back to take control again. A big piledriver puts Razor down so Shawn goes to the corner. In another famous visual, Shawn rides the ladder down onto Razor, crushing him yet again. Since he’s a jerk though, Shawn puts the ladder over top of Razor, but Ramon gets up and knocks Shawn off the ladder. Michaels gets tangled in the ropes, allowing Razor to climb up to unify the titles.

Rating: A+. This is one of the matches that reignited the midcard scene after things had died down for a bit. It also paved the way for the insane style that would start to dominate about five years later. That being said, it’s still a freaking AWESOME match with some iconic spots such as the splash. It also started Shawn on the roll of a lifetime, as the next year he would be in the world title match at Wrestlemania then win the title the following year. This match is required viewing for fans.

I.R.S. and company argue in the back, so let’s just cancel a ten man tag. In other words, we’re running long and don’t have time. It happened on Raw the next night and no one remembers it.

Ted DiBiase tries to bribe Mr. President.

Wrestlemania IX’s moment is Fuji throwing salt in Bret’s eyes. We don’t see the pin for some reason though.

Videos on Bret and Yoko set up the main event.

Burt Reynolds is guest ring announcer and my goodness he makes Scott Hall look like a poster boy for AA. Oh and Jennie Garth from Beverly Hills 90210 is timekeeper. The guest referee: Roddy Piper (pause for the huge ovation) who may or may not hate Bret because of what happened at Mania 8. Nice touch.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Yoko is defending if you can’t tell. Burt is barely able to read lines off a card. Hart is STILL selling the leg from earlier, because that’s how awesome he is. Yoko jumps Bret to start and the fans are already fired up for this. Bret tries to fire back with some punches but Yoko stomps him down. Piper and Cornette get in an argument as Yoko blasts Hart. The splash misses though and Bret pounds away, only to hurt his head on a headbutt.

Hart actually manages to punch Yoko down and gets two off an ax handle to the back. The champion comes back with fat man offense and drops the big leg for two. A headbutt puts Bret on the floor but he gets back in at eight. Yoko misses a charge in the corner and there’s a bulldog out of the corner to put the big man down. That only gets two though, as does the middle rope elbow. Bret keeps limping and hits the Hart Attack clothesline for a delayed two.

The belly to belly puts Bret down but Yoko won’t cover for no apparent reason. Instead he loads up the Banzai Drop, only to fall victim to the powers of gravity. It knocks the wind out of the monster, allowing Hart to hook the leg for the pin and the title as the roof is blown off of Madison Square Garden for about the fifth time tonight.

Rating: B-. While it isn’t a classic, the fans were WAY into this and it’s a feel good moment to end the show. Bret was fighting a very different kind of match here rather than he did the previous year, as here he was taking it straight to Yoko instead of sticking and moving. Very solid match here all things considered and a great way to get the giant out of the title scene.

The locker room empties out to celebrate with Bret but Owen stands in the aisle and stares down his brother to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is one of those shows where the bad stuff is bad, but on the other hand the good stuff is absolutely outstanding. With two of the best matches of all time on one show it’s easily one of if not the strongest Wrestlemanias from an in ring perspective. On top of that, the show had long lasting impact as the company focus shifted to the smaller sized guys and longer matches. This was an excellent show but some of the bad stuff can be fast forwarded.

Ratings Comparison

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Original: F

Redo: D

Randy Savage vs. Crush

Original: C+

Redo: C

Alundra Blayze vs. Lelani Kai

Original: D-

Redo: D

Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

Original: F

Redo: F+

Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger

Original: F

Redo: D+

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A-

I was a bit too nice to the middle part of the show last time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/17/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-10-maybe-the-best-mania-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania IX
Date: April 4, 1993
Location: Caesar’s Palace, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 16,981
Commentators: Jim Ross, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

We’re into the Monday Night Raw era as things are definitely shifting to a new generation. The main event tonight is Bret Hart defending the title against the new monster known as Yokozuna. Other than that we’ve got Beefcake/Hogan challenging Money Inc. for the tag titles in a match that sounds odd when I type it for some reason. Let’s get to it.

Gorilla Monsoon is host this year, which means we need a new commentator. We’ll get to that in a bit, but first of all let’s acknowledge the theme of the show: the World’s Largest Toga Party. Yeah that’s not going to get stupid at all.

Jim Ross debuts on WWF TV for the first time ever in a surprise jump from the other company. Granted it was about a year or so since JR was last seen but it was still surprising.

Cesar and Cleopatra are introduced to the crowd.

Randy Savage comes out on a sedan with the vestal virgins. Bobby Heenan is brought out riding a camel backwards, which he claims was supposed to be the sedan. Funny bit here.

Intercontinental Title: Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is defending of course and has the debuting Luna Vachon behind him. Tatanka is still undefeated here and would be so until much later in the year. Shawn’s former manager, Sensational Sherri, comes down the aisle to stare at Shawn and presumably be in Tatanka’s corner. Tatanka takes Shawn down a few times to start and they fight over arm control. Shawn comes back with a headlock and climbs the ropes to roll Tatanka down with it for two.

The champion tries it again but gets caught in a belly to back suplex for two this time instead. Shawn goes up again but dives into an armdrag as things pick up a bit. There’s a Flair Flip in the corner and a big chop puts Shawn on the floor. Sherri and Luna get in a staredown and Luna licks the ring post. More chops keep Michaels on the floor as the fans are getting into this.

Back in again and Shawn comes off the top with a semi-botched sunset flip for two but Tatanka comes right back with an atomic drop. A DDT puts Shawn down again and Tatanka works on Shawn’s apparently bad shoulder. Shawn tries a clothesline like an idiot and hurts his own arm again. We hit another armbar but Michaels fights up, only to charge shoulder first into the post.

Back to the armbar followed by a shoulder breaker for no cover by the challenger. A top rope chop to the shoulder has Shawn in even more trouble but a second attempt jumps into the superkick. Since it’s 1993 though that doesn’t end anything so Shawn sends Tatanka out to the floor. The girls get in another staredown but Shawn hits a running clothesline off the apron to take Tatanka out again.

Instead of following up, Shawn yells at Sherri. Since he’s Shawn Michaels though, he still maintains control with a neckbreaker for two. A standing dropkick gets two for Shawn and it’s off to a chinlock. That goes nowhere so Shawn hits a modified victory roll out of the corner for two. The shoulder seems to be fine now. Tatanka counters another victory roll attempt into an electric chair to put both guys down. A very delayed cover gets two for the challenger and it’s time to go on the warpath.

Shawn gets caught in a cross body for two and a slingshot sends him face first into the post for two. The crowd is WAY into this match now. Tatanka’s Papoose To Go (Samoan Drop) is countered into a rollup for two for Shawn but he walks into a powerslam for two. Shawn sends him out to the floor and the fans chant for Sherri. Michaels dives off the apron but slams his head into the steps, knocking himself silly and causing a countout win for the racial stereotype.

Rating: B. If Tatanks wins clean here, it’s a near classic. This was a VERY solid opener with the fans getting completely into the near falls. The shoulder injury being forgotten ten minutes into it hurt things though as I can’t stand a plot point being introduced and then left completely alone. Also Tatanka should have won but it still makes for a fine opener.

Luna lays out Sherri while Tatanka celebrates not winning the title.

The Steiners are ready for the Headshrinkers.

Steiner Brothers vs. Headshrinkers

This should be solid stuff. The Shrinkers are Samu and Fatu (Rikishi) here. Historic moment: JR calls this match a slobberknocker, unleashing the term on the wrestling world. The Headshrinkers have Afa as their manager, which will be mentioned later. Scott and Fatu start things off and after being shoved by the Samoan, Scott easily takes him down by the legs. A big old Steiner Line flips Fatu inside out but the Headshrinkers take Scott into the corner to work him over.

The Steiners are sent to the floor so they both climb to the top and hit a double Steiner Line to take both Samoans out to the floor. We settle down to Scott vs. Fatu again but it’s quickly off to Rick. Apparently Luna has attacked Sherri at the first aid station. Samu pounds on Rick in the corner and hits a running clothesline, only to be taken down by a running forearm/clothesline. Samu goes face first into the post to absolutely no effect, because he’s Samoan you see.

Back to Scott but Afa gets on the apron for a distraction. Scott charges into a hot shot to send him out to the floor in a NASTY looking bump. Afa cracks his staff over Scott’s back which looked great and sounded even greater. Things settle down a bit and Fatu hits a backbreaker and middle rope headbutt for two on Scott. A spinning kick to the face takes Scott down again but Samu charges into a boot in the corner.

Fatu blocks the hot tag by knocking Scott to the floor where he gets sent face first into the post. In a sweet sequence, Scott tries to ram Fatu’s head into the mat but Fatu pops up and superkicks Scott right back down. A modified Demolition Decapitatior gets two on Scott and let’s hit that nerve hold. Scott fights up and they collide as is common in tag matches. Heenan keeps ripping on JR and Oklahoma as Ross has almost no idea what to make of this kind of sarcasm. That says a lot when he used to work with Jim Cornette.

Back to Samu who goes up top, only to miss a top rope splash. The hot tag brings in Rick but a double headbutt immediately puts him back down. Here’s your awesome spot of the match: Rick gets loaded up in a Doomsday Device position but when Samu dives at him with a cross body, Rick catches him in mid air and powerslams/belly to belly suplexes him off Fatu’s shoulders and down. AWESOME looking move and they hit it perfectly. Scott hits a belly to belly on Fatu but Samu hits a superkick to take him right back down. Out of NOWHERE Scott hits the Frankensteiner for the pin. Nice bump from a guy that big.

Rating: B. I liked this one as much as I liked the opener which is saying a lot. This probably should have kicked the show off as the spots were hitting better and the fans were popping a lot louder, but I can get why they went with a title match. I’m a Headshrinkers fan so seeing them hold their own against one of the best teams ever is a very fun sight. Good match here and that powerslam was great.

Strap yourselves in now people, because it’s ALL downhill from here.

We cut to the back where Doink has desecrated a statue of Julius Caesar. This is when Doink is still the evil clown which had a ton of potential, but they of course had to make him kid friendly because that’s how wrestling works. The idea here is that Doink has been using evil pranks on Crush, including beating him with a prosthetic arm.

Crush vs. Doink the Clown

This is during Crush-A-Mania when he was on the verge of getting the mega push to the stars which would never happen. Crush chases him around the ring to start and slams Doink on the floor before pounding Doink in the face a bit. Doink tries to punch back but Crush no sells everything. Back inside and Crush hits a neckbreaker for no cover. A neck snap over the top keeps Doink down as does a backbreaker. We’re three minutes in and it’s all Crush so far.

As Crush is hitting some Sheamus forearms on the apron, Doink hits a kind of Stunner on the top rope to take over. A few top rope forearms to the back of Crush’s head keeps us in clown control and a lame piledriver gets no cover. Doink actually slams him but goes up top and jumps into a boot to the jaw. A cross body attempt by the Clown doesn’t work as Crush hits a powerslam before clotheslining Doink to the floor.

Doink tries to crawl under the ring but gets hit with a gorilla press back in the ring. Crush puts on the head vice (finisher) but as Doink gets to the ropes, the referee is bumped. The vice goes on again but another Doink comes out from under the ring with the cast. He blasts Crush in the head with it and the original Doink gets the pin.

Rating: D+. This was basically a squash until Doink got in some not terrible offense. Again though, this was when Crush was about to get pushed to the moon, so he loses to Doink? The Clown character had a ton of potential, but instead of going with something interesting like the Joker, we got FUN Doink soon after this, because that’s interesting stuff right?

Japanese tourist jokes aren’t funny so here are a bunch of them.

Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund

This is right before Razor turned face and it’s clear why given how big the pop he gets here is. Backlund offers a handshake and gets a toothpick in the face instead. A LOUD Razor chant opens things up as Backlund is shoved into the corner. Ramon slams him down and stomps away as Savage brings up Lex Luger knocking Bret Hart out cold earlier today.

It comes up out of nowhere in the middle of this match because there’s no reason for this match to take place. Leave it to JR to bring it back to the match as Backlund makes his comeback. A butterfly suplex puts Razor down and there’s Backlund’s atomic drop. That gets no cover though, as Razor grabs a small package to pin the wrestler with a wrestling move.

Rating: D. This was a squash at a Wrestlemania in 1993. Razor would be turning face soon after this while Backlund did nothing at all for a LONG time until he went nuts and actually won the world title. Nothing to see here though and it was clear that the announcers didn’t care about the match at all.

We recap Money Inc. attacking Brutus Beefcake and injuring his face (again) on Raw. Hulk Hogan was watching and came back to save his little buddy. The champions (Money Inc.) says they’ll bankrupt Hogan and Beefcake. Oh and we hear about a black eye that Hogan has from working in the gym the previous night. I’ve heard a bunch of stories over that before, but the most common one I hear is Savage decking him in the eye because he thought Liz had cheated on him with Hogan. The other version (and possibly the real one) is that Hogan had an accident on a Jet-Ski.

Tag Titles: Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs

Jimmy Hart is with the challengers because of how the champions hurt Beefcake. Hogan and Beefcake clear the ring while the music is still playing as the match begins. The champions stall on the floor for awhile until we get down to Beefcake (in a red/yellow mask) vs. I.R.S. The tax dude immediately goes for the face and it’s off to DiBiase for more of the same. DiBiase hits a middle rope ax handle to the mask and injures himself in the process. Ted continues to act way dumber than he is by ramming the mask into the buckle. So why did the punches work earlier?

Beefcake rams DiBiase’s head into the buckle instead and in the match we should have gotten five years ago, it’s Hogan vs. DiBiase. Ten punches in the corner put Ted down so Hogan pounds on the mat a bit. Off to Beefcake for a slam before it’s back to hogan for more punching. DiBiase ducks low and is immediately punched in the face again. I.R.S. comes in again and is punched by both Maniacs. All challengers so far.

The champions try to walk out but Finkus Maximus (remember the Roman theme) says that if they leave, they lose the titles. They get back in and the fans are chanting for Hogan. Ted goes for the throat to finally take over and I.R.S. chokes away a bit from the floor. More choking by DiBiase ensues before he cranks it up with the Million Dollar Dream. Savage: “They’re hanging from the rafter! Well they would if they had rafters. They have columns here and they’re hanging from them!”

I.R.S. tries to interfere for some reason but it allows Beefcake to come in with his own sleeper and put DiBiase out to break the hold and buy Hogan a breather. Hogan pops up and the double tag brings in Schyster to face Beefcake. An atomic drop puts Ted on the floor but the tax dude gets in a shot to Beefcake’s back to take over. Dibiase comes back in and rips the mask off of Brutus’ face so the champions can work over the face.

Beefcake comes back with a double clothesline out of nowhere but instead of tagging he puts I.R.S. in the sleeper. Ted breaks it up but the referee is bumped in the process. Hogan comes in like a hero and hits both guys with the steel mask but there’s no referee. What else do you do in this situation? You have Jimmy Hart turn his jacket inside out so it has white and black stripes and have him count then CELEBRATE LIKE YOU WON THE FREAKING BELTS. Another referee comes out to explain to Hogan how stupid he is and give Money Inc. the win by DQ.

Rating: D+. The match was ok at best but the ending is so dumb that I can barely comprehend it. I mean…..HOW STUPID CAN HOGAN POSSIBLY BE??? The guy has been around for nearly ten years and he thinks that would actually work? The match was just ok as it was mainly choking and punching for the first half, which is decent but nothing mind blowing. Then the ending sucked the life out of my brain which is normal for Hogan a lot of the time.

Lots of posing ensues but then the Maniacs open Money Inc.’s briefcase. They find tax forms, cash, and a brick. Heenan: “Well you never know when you’re gonna need a brick.” Hogan gives the money away and Heenan is suddenly a huge fan.

Todd Petingill finds Natalie Cole (singer I think) and the owner of Caesar’s Palace who are as riveting as you would expect.

Mr. Perfect says he’s going to solve the Lex Luger puzzle.

Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect

That sounds pretty awesome on paper. Anyway, Luger is the Narcissist at this point and comes out with some women in bikinis with thongs, sending Heenan through the roof. Well over the top of the columns at least. Perfect gets a very solid pop here but he would be used sparingly until he left in the fall. They trade headlocks to start and Luger bails to the corner. Now they trade hammerlocks and Luger bails to the ropes again.

Perfect hits a dropkick to send Luger to the outside as the crowd is staying hot. Back in and Luger starts using the power but Perfect blocks a big boot attempt. There’s the Robinsdale Crunch on Luger’s knee and Perfect cranks on it a bit for fun. We head to the corner for some LOUD chops but Lex whips him into the corner a few times to take over. We head to the floor with Luger ramming the injured back into the apron, followed by a backbreaker in the ring for two.

Perfect fights out of the corner with right hands but Luger scoops his legs and puts his own feet on the ropes for two. Mr. comes back with a nice sunset flip for two but a quick sleeper attempt is broken up. Back up and they slug it out a bit more with Perfect hitting a backdrop to take over. A slingshot sends Luger into the buckle and a forearm to the head gets two. Perfect hits a clothesline and neckbreaker for two each, as does a kind of missile dropkick. Luger wins the fight over a backslide and even though Perfect gets his feet in the ropes, Luger gets the pin anyway.

Rating: C. Decent match here but it never hit the level they were capable of. That ending was actually designed to set up something at the NEXT Wrestlemania which was unheard of at this point in time. Anyway, decent match here but it’s a disappointment due to how good this could and should have been.

Luger knocks him out post match and leaves. Perfect finally staggers after him and the fight starts again, until Shawn Michaels helps beat up Perfect.

Savage yells at Heenan for supporting Luger too much.

Gorilla Monsoon talks about the remaining matches.

Giant Gonzalez vs. Undertaker

Gonzalez is a legit 7’7 and is working for Harvey Wippleman for revenge on Undertaker after Undertaker got rid of Kamala. Taker comes out in a chariot and carrying a vulture. Undertaker literally only comes up to Gonzalez’s chest. Some uppercuts stagger the Giant but he grabs Taker by the throat to stop him cold. Taker climbs to the second rope and grabs Gonzalez by the throat, only to get hit low to stop him again.

Old School staggers the Giant a bit but he comes back with a clothesline to take over. Taker is thrown across the ring and we get a standing chinlock by the monster. The famous one fights up but gets thrown to the outside with ease. Taker is sent into the steps and we head back inside. Gonzalez pounds away a bit more but Taker slugs away, knocking Gonzalez down to one knee. Wippleman throws in a rag, which apparently the announcers can smell a chemical on from twenty feet away in an outdoor arena with over 15,000 people in it. Apparently it’s ether or something, earning Taker a DQ win.

Rating: D-. Gonzalez was AWFUL which really hurt things a lot. The main issue Undertaker had at this point was no one had any idea what to do with him. They just had him fight monsters for years on end which you can only watch for so long. This story would be reused about 12 years later with Undertaker playing Undertaker, Daivari playing Wippleman and Great Khali playing Gonzalez.

Referees check on the unconscious Undertaker as Gonzalez chokeslams a referee. The fans chant for Hogan but a gong goes off and Taker staggers out to beat up the monster.

We recap Jim Duggan being destroyed by Yokozuna. The fat man did the same to Bret Hart as well, setting up this match. In the back, Hogan says he wants the first title shot against either Hart of the Jap. His words, not mine.

Todd Pettingill continues to annoy fans.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Bret is defending against Yoko who won the Royal Rumble. It wasn’t an automatic title shot yet but starting the following year it would be. Bret hits a quick dropkick and pounds away but a single shot knocks the champion away. A big tackle runs Bret over and sends him to the outside but he trips Yoko up to take him down. Bret pounds away but it doesn’t do a lot of damage. Yoko wins a battle of the clotheslines and a big old legdrop crushes the champ’s face.

Off to a nerve hold for a bit but Bret gets his feet up in the corner to block a charge. A middle rope bulldog puts the monster down for two which is a victory in and of itself. Yoko superkicks Bret down and it’s right back to the nerve hold. Bret fights up and makes his comeback, finally knocking Yoko down with a middle rope clothesline. A buckle pad is ripped off somewhere in there and Bret rams him face first into it. Yoko falls on his stomach and Bret gets the Sharpshooter, only to have Fuji throw salt in the champ’s face. That’s actually enough for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. Bret did what he could but there’s a limit to what you can get out of a big fat guy like this. The ending is pretty lame and the match lasted less than nine minutes. That just doesn’t fit for a Wrestlemania main event but thankfully the rematch the next year would get more time and would be MUCH better.

Hogan runs out to check out Hart, so Mr. Fuji issues a challenge to Hogan for a title match RIGHT NOW. Bret tells Hogan to go get him and the fight is on.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna

Fuji misses a salt through, clothesline, legdrop, new champion.

Hogan poses a lot to end the show. Yeah that’s how Wrestlemania ends: in 22 seconds.

Overall Rating: D. The opening matches are as good as you’ll find for two straight openers at Mania in a long time, but after that it’s ALL downhill. The ending here was just stupid. First off, pride or whatever, WHY WOULD YOU GIVE A FRESH HULK HOGAN A WORLD TITLE SHOT AFTER YOU JUST WON THE BELT??? On top of that, we had some stupid endings with the tag title match and the Undertaker match, making this even worse. The problem with this show is other than the openers, it isn’t entertaining. I’ve never liked this show and most people don’t either, which is easy to understand.

Ratings Comparison

Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B+

Redo: B

Steiner Brothers vs. Headshrinkers

Original: B+

Redo: B

Doink the Clown vs. Crush

Original: D

Redo: D+

Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund

Original: C-

Redo: D

Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez

Original: F+

Redo: D-

Yokozuna vs. Bret Hart

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Yokozuna vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: F+

Redo: D

I actually liked it better this time. Man alive I must have been in a bad mood for the first one.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/16/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-9-wrestlemania-goes-outside/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania VIII
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re into another huge stadium here and the interesting thing is that Hogan, while in the final match, isn’t in the title scene at all. We’ve got a double main event here of Hogan vs. Sid in Hogan’s “retirement” match and the still pretty new Flair defending the world title against Randy Savage in a match built not only around the title but also Liz, which we’ll get into later. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how it’s a double main event. They’re not really going for the epic feeling here it seems.

Reba McIntyre sings the national anthem.

Tito Santana vs. Shawn Michaels

Tito is El Matador now and Shawn is freshly heel. Bobby says Reba is Tito’s sister: Arriba McIntyre. Say it out loud and you’ll get the joke. After taking forever to get Sherri to the floor, Tito gets a fast two off a cross body. They head to the mat for a headlock on Shawn which doesn’t last long. Michaels avoids a punch to the face but gets clotheslined out to the floor instead.

Back to the chinlock which doesn’t go anywhere this time either, so Shawn takes over in the corner. That also goes nowhere so Santana punches him in the face and takes it right back to the mat. Shawn finally comes back and pounds away even more, this time sending Tito out to the floor. A backbreaker gets two for Shawn and we hit the chinlock again, this time by the future world champion. Santana fights up but walks into the superkick for no cover.

The Backdrop Suplex (Shawn’s old finisher) is countered and there’s the flying forearm to send Shawn to the floor. Back in and a slingshot forearm puts Shawn down again as does a big atomic drop. Tito’s forearm to the back of the head sends Shawn to the outside again, only to have Sherri trip Tito up on a suplex attempt to give Michaels the pin.

Rating: C. This was ok but it was a lot of kicking and chinlocks for an opening match. Tito was good for giving you a guaranteed decent performance out there, so putting him against Shawn was a good move for the most part. The match wasn’t great or anything but it did a decent job at what it was supposed to do.

Gene is on the old school interview platform and calls out the Legion of Doom. With them however is their former manager Paul Ellering complete with the rolled up Wall Street Journal. Ellering talks about bringing the LOD together before talking about how this is the beginning of the end. They want the tag titles back but would never get them again. Hawk says they were a runaway train, but now look who’s driving it. They don’t care who the champions are, because they’re coming for the gold.

Jake Roberts says there’s no truth to the rumor of him bringing a snake to the ring. We get a clip of Jake slamming Taker’s hand in a coffin and laying out a helpless Paul Bearer.

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

A right hand to the face has no effect on Taker so Jake pounds away so more. Heenan is already freaking out about how Taker can’t be hurt as is his custom. Jake knocks him to the floor but Undertaker lands on his feet. Roberts is pulled to the floor as well and rammed into the post to give the dead man control. Heenan cracks jokes and says he thinks he has two brilliant minds. Gorilla: “I’m in big trouble.”

As Heenan talks about Bearer earning the Urn, Taker chokes away in the corner and pounds on Jake for a bit. An elbow drop keeps Jake down and there’s the jumping clothesline for good measure. Out of NOWHERE, Jake hits the DDT to put Taker down but he sits up a few seconds later and grabs Jake by the throat. A second DDT puts Taker down again but Jake goes after Bearer instead. There’s the sit up and Undertaker follows Jake outside, hitting a tombstone on the FLOOR to end Jake and make Undertaker 2-0.

Rating: C-. The problem with these early Wrestlemania matches for Undertaker is that they didn’t have a ton of story or drama to them. Jake was in his last match for the company here before he went to WCW for a cup of coffee, so he didn’t seem to be giving it his all out there. The kicking out of the DDTs was impressive as was the Tombstone, but that’s about it.

Piper and Bret are facing each other later tonight and Piper talks about growing up near the Hart Family. Some jokes are cracked and Bret doesn’t take too kindly to it. Things get testy when Bret wants the IC Title back. This is much more of a match of respect than hatred.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. Bret Hart

Piper is defending. There’s a story here actually: Bret was “sick” and lost the title to Mountie, only to have Piper win it about a day and a half later. This is Bret’s rematch. Heenan: “How would you handle Piper if you were Bret?” Gorilla: “I would use my speed advantage. You?” Heenan: “Waffle him with a tire iron.” Bret takes him down to start and Piper spits in his face, basically becoming the heel of the match early on.

They trade arm holds to start but Piper can’t escape Bret’s non-evil clutches. Once he finally frees himself, it’s a dropkick to put Roddy down instead. Bret might have hurt his shoulder in the process, but of course he’s goldbricking, which gives him a two count via a small package. Piper slaps him in the face so Bret cross bodies both guys to the outside. Back in and Piper gets in a cheap shot which apparently busts Bret open. This was a big deal actually as Bret claimed it was a legit cut but in reality he bladed and lied to prevent punishment and still make it look good. Smart guy that Hitman.

Roddy pounds away for awhile and is reverting to his old style far more than he has in years. Bret comes back with a sunset flip for two and the mat is getting bloody in a hurry. Piper punches him down for two but Bret comes back with a forearm to send the champion to the outside. Back in and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Piper’s head lands on Bret’s ribs which should be a count but the referee sits up instead. Roddy goes up but Bret is goldbricking again, allowing him to slam Piper face first into the mat.

A suplex gets two for Hart and it’s time for the FIVE MOVES OF DOOM. Piper blocks the Sharpshooter though, so Bret settles for the middle rope elbow. Roddy blocks that too though with a boot to the face and they slug it out again. There goes the referee and Piper clotheslines Bret to the outside. As they come back in, Roddy grabs the ring bell to complete the heel turn. He lifts it up to crush Bret, only to stop himself and put on a sleeper instead. That proves to be his downfall though as Bret climbs up the corner and falls back on Piper for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. This might be Piper’s best matches ever but even rarer is seeing him pinned in the WWF. Piper was VERY protective of his character, meaning that he was very rarely pinned. The match was great here and wound up being Piper’s last match in the company for several years. Really good stuff here as Bret is on the verge of shooting up the card to the world title in the fall.

Piper puts the title on Hart after thinking about clocking him with the belt.

We hear from WBF Bodybuilding Pro Lex Luger. He wouldn’t have a major appearance again until January of 1993. Again, who thought bodybuilding on PPV was a good idea? That would be Mr. XFL, Vince McMahon.

The Mountie, the Nasty Boys and the Repo Man laugh evily.

Duggan, Slaughter, Virgil and Boss Man respond with nothing of note to say.

Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter/Virgil/Big Boss Man vs. Nasty Boys/Moutnie/Repo Man

Just a collection of lower midcard guys getting a Wrestlemania payday here. Neither team gets an entrance. Instead, Ray Combs of Family Feud is guest ring announcer for this and cracks a few jokes about the heels pre-match. The good guys clean house to start and hit a quadruple clothesline to clear the ring. Heenan announces that Shawn Michaels has left the building. Gorilla sums up our responses: “WHO CARES???”

Anyway Duggan and Sags start things off and it’s Jim hitting a few clotheslines to take over. Off to Slaughter who gets poked in the eye, allowing for the tag to Knobs. Slaughter pounds away to take over before it’s off to Boss Man for a boot to the face. Brian avoids a charge into the corner and Boss Man’s splash misses Repo Man as well, giving the heels control for a bit. Repo crotches himself and Boss Man slugs him down for good measure.

Off to Virgil who seems to mess up almost anything where he jumps into the air. Duggan tries to come in to save his partner but it’s back to Sags to beat on Virgil even more. A pumphandle slam gets two on Virgil and it’s back to Mountie. Everything breaks down and in the melee the Nastys are rammed together, allowing Virgil to steal the pin.

Rating: D. As I said, this was nothing more than a way to throw a bunch of guys onto the show at the same time. This was a much better idea than having four matches eat up a few minutes each as it accomplishes the same goal here. They were out there as filler before the world title match and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.

Flair and Perfect smile over having a large centerfold of Miss Elizabeth. I can’t imagine how teasing this angle was for thirteen year old boys. They say Savage is losing tonight and that Liz is leaving with Flair.

Savage won’t give any interviews.

To recap the world title match, Flair claims that he had a relationship with Liz before she was married to Savage, so tonight Savage is out for revenge and the title. Flair had some doctored photos and that’s about it, so it was more about humiliation than anything else. It’s a great angle and would still work perfectly to this day if done right.

WWF World Title: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

There’s no Liz in sight to start and Savage comes to the ring last. Oh and Mr. Perfect is in Flair’s corner which will come into play later. Flair tries to walk up the aisle so Savage decks him from behind. Perfect makes a save by throwing Randy down as things are looking chaotic already. They get into the ring and Savage starts fast with some shots into the corner and punches down onto Flair’s head.

Heenan is at his most biased ever and his voice is almost cracking already. A clothesline puts Flair down and a back elbow gets two. Flair comes back with a big backdrop to put Savage out on the floor as the champion takes over. Flair rams Savage’s back into the apron and takes over with a few suplexes including a belly to back for two. Heenan wants to see the pictures and I can’t say I blame him.

A big chop puts Savage down for two and we head to the floor. Savage has his back rammed into the apron again and Flair suplexes him back into the ring for two more. Randy comes back with a single right hand and the place ERUPTS. A swinging neckbreaker puts Flair down but he pokes Savage in the eye to take him down. The champ goes up top, only to jump into a clothesline from Savage. Savage whips him into the corner and we get a Flair Flip to the apron where Ric runs up top, only to jump into another clothesline for two.

Savage hits his third clothesline in a roll to send Flair out to the floor. A top rope ax handle sends Flair into the barricade followed by a shot into the post. Flair is busted open and there’s the Flair Flop on the floor. A suplex puts Flair down on the floor again as Heenan is begging for the match to be stopped. Back in and Savage pounds away before hitting a top rope ax handle for two.

The top rope elbow hits but Perfect breaks up the pin. Thankfully the referee doesn’t call for the bell as Perfect throws something to Ric. The referee is bumped but it’s not that bad. A shot to the face with the object puts Randy down but it only gets two. The fans are losing their minds on these kickouts. Flair pounds away and is pulled away by the referee, allowing Perfect to blast him in the knee with a chair.

This brings out Liz who marches through some suits (one of which being worn by Shane McMahon) as Flair works over the leg. The knee crusher sets up the Figure Four (complete with interference from Perfect). Heenan: “SHOW ME THE PICTURES!” Randy turns the hold over but Flair breaks it quickly. Savage’s leg is done but he grabs a two count off a small package. Flair says this is for Liz as he stomps on the knee even more. He grabs Savage’s leg but Savage gets in a quick right hand and rolls Flair up (with a handful of trunks) for the pin and the title.

Rating: A. If you ever want a match based on the good guy overcoming insurmountable odds, this is pretty high up on the list. Savage came back from EVERYTHING and while Liz was there, she wasn’t a major factor at all. The match is a masterpiece with both guys looking great. Savage was in a career resurgence, despite being world champion only three years earlier. Anyway, great match here and it still holds up very well today.

Post match Flair tries to kiss Liz, triggering another brawl. Perfect helps take Savage down and lets Flair pound away for a bit. Referees finally break it up and Savage is announced as the new champion to a big roar.

Flair, Perfect and Heenan go on a huge rant against Savage with Flair saying that Savage is going to be lying about being champion and lying about having the love of Liz. They tell Savage to do it again and claim that Savage was a cheater which won’t work again.

Savage gives a rebuttal, saying that he’s going to go after Flair no matter where or when it is. He hands Liz the title and says that it’s hers. As for Flair, Savage is for him and it’s going to continue. I love these two promos and they still work very well.

We recap the Wrestlemania VII press conference where Hogan was announced as the #1 contender. Sid wasn’t happy but joined Hogan in a tag match on SNME. However he turned on Hogan and left him alone against Undertaker and Flair. Sid then destroyed Beefcake’s Barber Shop set and wound up with a bunch of shampoo on his face in an unintentionally hilarious scene. We also get a montage of Sid beating up jobbers and Virgil.

Rick Martel makes a stupid joke about Tatanka scalping tickets.

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

There are Indians at ringside chanting for Tatanka. This is about two months after Tatanka debuted on TV so you should be able to figure out what’s going to happen pretty quickly here. Tatanka start off hot as Heenan explaining that Flair did nothing wrong. Gorilla shouts that Heenan is a liar, so Heenan challenges him to a fight. Martel makes a quick comeback and sends Tatanka out to the floor. Back in and Bobby makes Indian jokes as Martel stomps away a bit more. Rick goes up and gets crotched, allowing Tatanka to pound away even more. Out of nowhere a cross body pins Martel.

Rating: D+. The match was ok but it was nothing more than a way to give the fans a breather. Like I said, no one knew Tatanka at this point due to how little time he had been on TV. Martel was in total jobber to the stars territory by this point and would be gone pretty soon. Nothing to remember here at all.

Money Inc. isn’t worried about the Natural Disasters because they’ve stolen the Disasters’ manager in the form of Jimmy Hart.

The Disasters say they’re ready and are after the titles and Jimmy Hart.

Tag Titles: Money Inc. vs. Natural Disasters

Money Inc. is defending and is comprised of Ted DiBiase and I.R.S. DiBiase and Earthquake start things off with the heels (Money Inc.) getting beaten down and the rich man being knocked to the floor. Off to Typhoon vs. I.R.S. For osme arm work by the big guy. Typhoon misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to DiBiase….who is immediately beaten down as well. Typhoon misses a splash against the ropes and falls over the top and out to the floor.

I.R.S. cranks on a front facelock for a bit as Ted hits an ax handle off the middle rope for two. A double clothesline puts both guys down as this match is DRAGGING. Everything breaks down and the challengers take over. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and there’s the big splash from Typhoon. Jimmy Hart pulls Irwin out to break up the Earthquake splash and the champions walk out to retain the titles.

Rating: D-. I have no idea what the point of this was. The match wasn’t entertaining, it wasn’t good, and the match didn’t accomplish anything. I’m guessing this was supposed to be filler between the other matches, but we already had one of those and that’s what we’re about to get next. Nothing to see here at all.

Brutus Beefcake supports Hogan.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Skinner catches him with the tobacco juice to the face to start and hits a shoulder breaker for no cover. Skinner’s reverse DDT gets two but Owen gets tired of selling and rolls him up for the pin. This was about a minute long.

Gene is with Sid and the tall man calls him a fat bald headed oaf. Sid guarantees this is Hogan’s last match, which triggers an interview with Hogan where he says he isn’t sure if he’s retiring or not. Sid doesn’t care.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

With the music still playing, Sid jumps Hogan but Hulk pounds back and knocks Sid to the apron. The music is still playing and Hogan hits a forearm to the chest and a clothesline to put Sid on the floor. AWESOME opening sequence here and it still works really well. Back in and they stare each other down but Hogan knocks Sid right back out to the floor. Back in again and Sid wants a test of strength.

Sid puts Hogan down but Hulk makes the big comeback to the delight of the crowd. Justice gets knocked into the corner but Sid’s manager Harvey Wippleman (totally unneeded here) distracts Hulk, allowing a chokeslam to put him down. Hulk gets knocked to the floor and hit with Wippleman’s bag, setting up a nerve hold by Sid.

Hogan fights up, only to get put right back down in a side slam. The powerbomb gets two and it’s Hulk Up time. Sid eats a few buckles and it’s big boot, slam, legdrop….TWO? This is assumed to be a screwjob by Sid but in reality, the scheduled run-in by someone we’ll name in a second was late so Sid had to kick out. Anyway there’s the DQ by Wippleman to end things.

Rating: D. Well that sucked. It’s about twelve minutes long and went nowhere at all due to the majority of the match being spent in a nerve hold. Well maybe not the majority but far longer than it should have been. Anyway, this was nothing of note and saving Sid was stupid due to him being gone in a few weeks due to failing a drug test. Nothing to see here, until after the match.

Post match, Papa Shango of all people (the guy who missed his cue) runs out and beats down Hogan along with Sid until the Ultimate Warrior makes a legitimately shocking return for the save. A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. You have two classics, a huge shocking return, and some other decent stuff in there. What else do you want from a Wrestlemania, especially in 1992. Good stuff here as the Hogan era is definitely coming to a close. He would somehow get another world title the next year and the main event here sucked, but things were moving beyond him and it was clear that things would survive. Good stuff here.

Ratings Comparison

Shawn Michaels vs. Tito Santana

Original: B-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Jake Roberts

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Original: A

Redo: B+

Big Boss Man/Virgil/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Repo Man/Nasty Boys/Mountie

Original: F

Redo: D

Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair

Original: A+

Redo: A

Tatanka vs. Rick Martel

Original: D

Redo: D+

Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

Original: D-

Redo: D-

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: D

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

It’s the same overall despite some of the main stuff being different. That’s interesting.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/15/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-8-hogan-who-needs-the-bald-man/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania VII
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Memorial Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Gorilla Monsoon

Oh boy has a lot of stuff changed here. First of all, Jesse is gone from the company and is being replaced by a revolving door of replacements. Other than that we’ve got Sgt. Slaughter as an anti-American world champion who needs a REAL AMERICAN to save the title for the country. There’s also a retirement match here between Randy Savage and Ultimate Warrior, which might actually be better than Warrior’s title win last year. Oh and there’s this big guy in black that is making his Wrestlemania debut tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Hogan saving AMERICA, which is what the entire show is about. I believe the subtitle of this show is Stars and Stripes Forever, so if you can’t figure out what the ending is going to be, I can’t help you. Keep in mind that this was inspired by the Gulf War….which was already over but who cares about technicalities like that?

Willie Nelson sings America the Beautiful.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan is dressed like a drunk Uncle Sam and comes out for commentary for the opening match since Heenan is managing. He gives his thoughts on the main matches too.

The Rockers say they’ll beat the Heenan Family.

Haku/Barbarian vs. Rockers

Shawn and Haku get us going with Michaels trying to speed things up, only to be slammed into the corner. The second attempt at flying around works a bit better as a dropkick puts Haku down. The Rockers do some of their double teaming stuff but Barbie takes them down with a big double clothesline. Shawn and Marty double superkick him down though and the Heenan Family has to regroup a bit.

We get down to Marty vs. Barbarian again and speed takes over one more time. A sunset flip doesn’t work for Jannetty but Barbarian punches the mat. A rana takes Barbarian down and Marty pounds away for two. Off to Haku and a double headbutt puts Marty down again. Jannetty loads up another rana but the foreigners hit a double hot shot onto the top rope to really take over this time.

A gorilla press plants Jannetty and it’s time for more heel double teaming. Marty comes back with something like a cross body for two but the speed continues to get beaten down. By speed I mean the drug of the day for Jannetty of course. Back to Barbarian for a bearhug followed by a powerslam so wicked that the fans pop for it. The falling headbutt misses though and it’s hot tag time to Shawn. Things really do speed up now but Shawn gets kicked in the face to slow him down. That goes nowhere for the villains though and it’s a Michaels cross body off the top for the pin on Haku.

Rating: B. Just a fast paced tag team match here with power vs. speed. This is one of those formulas that works no matter how many times you do it as long as you have talented guys in there. The future Faces of Fear were fine as monsters for the Rockers to conquer and it set a good pace for the show here. Solid opening match.

Gene is with Marla Maples (not really famous), Alex Trebek and Regis Philbin, our celebrities for tonight. Regis is scared of Earthquake, Trebek tries to make Jeopardy jokes, and Marla is still not famous. Apparently she was married to Donald Trump. Ok then.

Dino Bravo vs. Texas Tornado

Von Erich popped into the company around Summerslam, won the IC Title from Perfect, lost it and was immediately a jobber to the stars until he went back to Texas. It’s a fast brawl to start but Bravo avoids the claw. Heenan is on commentary now. Von Erich runs into a boot in the corner and Dino takes over for a bit. The side suplex puts Tornado down for two and that’s about it for Bravo. A few seconds later it’s Claw and Tornado Punch for the pin on Bravo.

Rating: D. Nothing at all to see here and it’s a match that easily could have been cut. This was Bravo’s last televised match before he left the company for good a year or so later. Afterwords he would soon be murdered in an illegal cigarette smuggling operation in Canada. Now there’s a story that you can’t make up.

Warlord and Slick are ready for Davey Boy.

Bulldog talks to Winston (his new dog) and says there’s no bull in this bulldog.

Davey Boy Smith vs. Warlord

This is about whether or not Davey can break the full nelson. We start with our standard power stuff as they ram into each other a few times, only to have Bulldog knock Warlord out to the floor. A crucifix doesn’t work for Bulldog so Warlord drops some elbows for no cover. We hit the bearhug but Bulldog punches out, only to get caught in a hot shot to keep him on the mat.

A BIG belly to belly (kind of) puts Bulldog down but again Warlord won’t cover. We hit the chinlock until Bulldog fights up and hits a dropkick to send Warlord into the corner. Punches in said corner can’t drop Warlord but a cross body is finally enough to get him off his feet. Warlord counters a piledriver but Bulldog counters the counter into a sunset flip for two. Bulldog misses a charge into the corner and Warlord hooks the full nelson. It looks like all hope is lost but the fingers aren’t locked. Bulldog finally flips out of it and hooks the powerslam out of nowhere for the win.

Rating: C+. This would be filed under the category of “shocking the world” as it was actually a pretty solid match. Bulldog would get a lot better all of a sudden while Warlord would fall further down the card than he already was. This was way better than I was expecting and it turned into a pretty decent power match.

Jimmy Hart and hits Nasty Boys are ready to take the tag titles from the Harts.

The Harts say good luck cracking the Foundation.

Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

The Nastys got got hot in WCW in 1990, weren’t signed to contracts, and debuted in the WWF in late 1990/early 1991. They won a tag team battle royal for this shot they’re getting here. Jerry and Bret start things off and it’s a quick Thesz Press to take Sags down. Brian gets knocked off the apron by the Hitman and Sags gets tripped down to the mat. No Sharpshooter yet though as Bret stomps the midsection instead.

Off to Anvil who starts powering Knobs around and pounds away in the corner. After being knocked to the floor, Brian comes right back in and is immediately caught in an armbar. The Nastys double team Neidhart in their corner to FINALLY take over, but a mat slam is enough to let Neidhart tag Bret back in. Hart tries to fight off both of the Boys, only to get decked from behind by Knobs.

Bret is sent out to the floor where he may have hurt his knee. Back inside Jerry whips him into the corner as we hit the heat section of the match. Sags hooks a reverse chinlock before Knobs comes in to do exactly the same. Back to Jerry for a neckbreaker for two and Brian breaks up a hot tag attempt. Hart breaks up a reverse chinlock by Knobs and now it’s Jerry to break up another hot tag.

Brian misses a splash in the corner and Bret makes the tag but, say it with me, the referee doesn’t see it. We get heel miscommunication and NOW we get a tag to Anvil. Jim cleans house and hits a quick powerslam for two on Knobs as everything breaks down. Jimmy Hart gets decked by Bret and there’s a Hart Attack for Knobs. The referee tries to get Bret out and Sags decks Bret with Jimmy’s helmet, giving the Nastys the titles.

Rating: B-. Another solid tag match here as the division was getting very hot all of a sudden. The Harts would quietly split up after this with Bret moving into the IC Title picture soon thereafter. The Nastys would hold the titles over the summer before dropping them to the monsters known as the LOD at Summerslam.

Jimmy Hart’s near panic attack over winning the belts is hilarious stuff.

We recap Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel. Back in October, Roberts and Martel were on the Brother Love Show where Martel tried to spray his cologne on Damien’s bag, only to hit Jake’s eyes by mistake. Jake was basically blind for a few months, leading to the following blindfold match. These have never been good in the history of wrestling and I don’t expect it to be here.

Jake says snakes always do it better in the dark.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

In short, they’re both in hoods and neither guy can see. So the match starts and both guys point across the ring while trying to find where the other is. Martel gets down on the mat and crawls around, only to give us some stupid comedy spots with both guys tripping over the other. Rick tries a backdrop but Jake runs off to the side, showing that he can clearly see if you’re thinking about this.

They miss each other in the corner a few times until Martel finally grabs him for a slam, only to miss an elbow drop. Martel gets the referee in the corner, only to realize he’s grabbing a shirt. Jake uses the crowd for help by pointing and listening to the crowd cheer as he points at Martel. This continues on for awhile until Martel nearly grabs the snake bag.

The announcers continue a running joke where they can’t hear each other which isn’t funny. Jake gets knocked to the floor so Martel follows. He grabs a chair and pokes around with it but only hits the post. Back in and Martel takes Jake down and hooks the Boston Crab, only to have it broken quickly. Roberts grabs the DDT a second later for the pin.

Rating: F. This wasn’t wrestling. It was a stupid idea with both guys wandering around and making no contact for about seven and a half minutes before both guys hit their finishers. Thankfully this feud was done after this as I don’t think the fans could stand any more of it. Oh and on top of that, Martel didn’t cheat once by looking under the mask. Nice heel work there.

The Nasty Boys celebrate in the back and disgust Marla Maples.

Jimmy Snuka vs. The Undertaker

For those of you reading this now, we’re currently at 20-0 and it all begins here. Taker slugs him around and rams Snuka head first into the corner a few times. The big jumping clothesline takes Snuka down and there’s a quick smother by Taker. Jimmy charges into a knee in the corner and gets slammed down, only for an elbow drop to miss. Snuka chops away but misses a dive and falls to the floor. The Tombstone ends this a few seconds later.

Rating: D+. The match is just a squash but it’s far more historic than anything else. Undertaker would go on to become the true Mr. Wrestlemania, never losing a single match in the entirety of his career there up to the point this is being written (2013). Snuka would fade from view soon after this.

We recap Savage vs. Warrior. Savage attacked then WWF Champion Ultimate Warrior on Saturday Night’s Main Event because he wanted a title match. Queen Sherri then got on her knees in front of Warrior at the Rumble, only to be turned down again. Savage cost Warrior the title later in the night, setting up a career ending match here tonight.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Before the match, Heenan spots Miss Elizabeth sitting in the crowd. Warrior only walks to the ring with a coat on instead of his usual sprint to the ring. His trunks have the WWF Title belt on the back with the words “Means much more than this”. The fans HATE Savage here while Warrior gets some great pops. They lock up to start with Warrior easily shoving Randy down a few times. A shoulder does nothing for Savage so he heads to the outside.

Back in and a clothesline puts Savage down and there’s an overhand choke. An atomic drop has Savage in trouble again and there’s a big atomic drop for good measure. Sherri tries to interfere and is immediately knocked to the outside again. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Warrior pounds away as this is completely one sided so far. Savage finally comes back with a clothesline but he dives off the top into a slam position, but Warrior puts him down on his feet with no slam. Now THAT is a mind game.

Macho King goes to the floor and grabs a chair which is nothing more than a distraction so that he can jump Warrior. That goes as well as anything else has for him so far with Warrior pounding away at Savage’s head. Warrior stomps away in the corner as Heenan says you couldn’t sneak a midget into the building. Savage falls out of the corner to avoid a charge, sending Warrior out to the floor. Sherri adds a slap to the face and there’s the top rope ax handle.

Warrior gets posted and Sherri gets in a few more shots for good measure. We’re told that this is the largest PPV audience in the history of pay per view. Since there’s no way to know that for months, I don’t think this is the case. Warrior absorbs some slams and pops up to stare Savage down. A Sherri distraction doesn’t work at all and Warrior runs the ropes, only to be slammed face first down into the mat for two.

We hit the chinlock/sleeper for a bit before a double clothesline puts both guys down. Sherri tries to interfere again but the referee is taken down in the process. AGAIN the Queen interferes but accidentally takes Savage out by mistake. Warrior goes after her but gets caught in a rollup for two. Heenan is panicking over this stuff. Savage clotheslines him down and hits the flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, which gets a two count in total. To say Savage is in shock is the understatement of the year.

Warrior starts shaking the ropes and hits the war path around the ring before clotheslining Savage half to death. The gorilla press and splash only get two and Warrior talks to his hands, asking if it’s time for him to step aside. With Warrior on the apron, Savage decks him down to the floor as the crowd continues to be on the edges of their seats.

Savage loads up the ax handle to the barricade but Warrior hits him coming down, sending Randy crashing into the barricade. Back in and Savage can barely stand so Warrior hits two tackles to send Savage out to the floor both times. A third hits and Savage is DONE. Warrior puts his foot on the chest to end Savage’s career.

Rating: A. After watching both this and Wrestlemania 6 in about three days, there is zero question as to which is the better match. This was a pair of titans colliding and one man clearly was better. That’s one of the formulas that never fails if worked even mostly right and they NAILED IT here. This is by far and away Warrior’s best match ever, but the best part is yet to come.

Post match Sherri gets in the ring and beats the tar out of Savage who is defenseless and can’t see who it is. Elizabeth shocks everyone by jumping the guardrail and throwing Sherri to the floor in the only time I can ever remember her getting physical. Savage gets up and is SHOCKED to see Liz, who hadn’t been seen in about a year. Liz says it was Sherri attacking Savage who has no idea what to do.

Liz holds out her arms and after a few moments, Savage hugs her to one of the biggest ovations you will ever hear. Savage puts Liz on his shoulder before the go to leave. As is their custom, Liz holds the ropes for him but Savage says not this time, and holds the ropes open for her. Savage gets to take a bow in the middle of the ring and the fans are thrilled. This is the only, repeat ONLY, moment in wrestling that legitimately brings a tear to my eye every time I watch it. I think that’s the case for a lot of fans.

Regis Philbin is measured for a coffin by Undertaker. Regis: “We’re dying out here.”

Demolition is with Alex Trebek who annoys them with stupid Jeopardy talk. It’s Smash and Crush at this point, managed by Mr. Fuji again.

Regis talks to Tenryu and Kitao who are here for one night only. They don’t speak English so we get some racially insensitive attempts at communication.

Jake Roberts and Damien torment Trebek a bit. This is why intermission getting cut out was a good idea.

Demolition vs. Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao

Now this is one of those out of nowhere matches. Demolition is on their very last toes of their very last legs here as they’ve even got Mr. Fuji again. Tenryu is a Japanese legend and Kitao is a big time sumo guy who became a pro and didn’t do much. Kitao and Crush start things off but everything breaks down quickly. Fuji whacks Kitao in the back and Demolition takes over again. Gorilla asks what it takes to become a grand champion of sumo. Brain: “Being able to eat 1100 bowls of rice in an hour with a single chopstick.”

Crush slams Kitao down and it’s off to Smash. Kitao finally comes out of the corner with a clothesline and it’s off to Tenryu. He speeds things up in a hurry but misses a top rope back elbow. Crush hits a backbreaker to put Tenryu down but Kitao breaks up the Decapitator. He breaks it up again and Tenryu hits a fast enziguri and powerbomb for the pin on Smash.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here and I have no idea what the point of this match was. It’s the final match for Demolition and on top of that, THIS is how you use Tenryu, a legitimate Japanese legend? The match was less than five minutes long and this is the only time I know of that Tenryu appeared for the company in a regular match for nearly two years. My guess would be this is part of the working agreement with Tenryu’s SWS.

Boss Man says Heenan and his Family has nowhere else to hide tonight.

Mr. Perfect and Heenan say about what you would expect them to say about Big Boss Man.

Intercontinental Title: Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Perfect is defending. This is an interesting yet simple idea for a story: Heenan had insulted Boss Man’s mama so Boss Man swore revenge. He went after the Heenan Family and beat every single one of them until there was only Perfect left. Tonight is the final showdown. They spit at each other to start and Perfect slaps Boss Man like a schmuck. Boss Man hits him once to knock Perfect out to the floor and there’s a spin around BY THE HAIR. FREAKING OW MAN!

Boss Man speeds around the corner and hits a big clothesline to take Hennig down. Perfect gets tossed out to the floor and Boss Man is standing tall. Back in and Boss Man hits the running crotch attack to Perfect’s back and whips him with a belt for good measure. Perfect finally avoids a shot and takes Boss Man down with some kicks to the ribs. Off to a chinlock with a knee in the back followed by an abdominal stretch. There’s the Hennig neck snap for two and Mr. goes up, only to jump into a boot.

Perfect gets to do his reverse crotching into the post but as they go to the floor, Boss Man is whipped into the steps to take him down again. Since it was a Heenan distraction that caused the whip into the steps, here’s Andre the Giant to counter the weasel. Andre picks up the belt and takes way too long to get to his position, from which he whacks Perfect in the head to knock him out cold. Boss Man covers but Haku and Barbarian run in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This wasn’t great and I have no idea why they didn’t change the title. The story set it up to be a title change, but I guess they were hoping for something else besides this. What that was I have no idea as Boss Man would never come close to the title again. The match was decent enough all things considered though.

Boss Man and Andre clean house post match.

Donald Trump, Chuck Norris, Lou Ferrigno and Henry Winkler are here. Yep, the Fonz showed up at Wrestlemania.

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Valentine turned face a few months ago and this is his big match for the forces of good. We’re 20 seconds in and Valentine is getting powerslammed down for two. A splash misses in the corner and Valentine gets him down to one knee. Quake breaks the Figure Four twice, hits a big elbow and drops the Earthquake for the pin.

Rating: F+. Earthquake was pretty much done as a singles guy at this point but I’m assuming he got some shots at Hogan on house shows over the summer. Other than that though this was a filler match that didn’t need to be on the card at all. Nothing to see here but at least Quake looked dominant.

The LOD says Power and Glory will be sour and gory after the match.

Power and Glory vs. Legion of Doom

Hercules is sent to the floor and it’s a Doomsday Device to end Roma in less than a minute. They were clearly coming for the belts very soon.

We recap Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase. Basically Virgil spent years serving DiBiase and FINALLY snapped on him at the Royal Rumble, setting up this match tonight. Roddy Piper is Virgil’s mentor here too.

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Virgil gets one of the three big pops of his entire career here, with the first being when he finally hit DiBiase with the belt. The other will be in less than ten minutes. Virgil pounds away to start and sends Ted out to the floor. Back in and Ted hits a clothesline but an elbow misses a second later. DiBiase, the wrestler, easily takes Virgil down and hits a suplex for two. Things are REALLY slow now compared to just a few moments before. We head to the floor for a bit with DiBiase shoving down Piper, who was on crutches at this point. DiBiase talks some trash so Piper pulls the top rope down but the distraction is enough for a countout.

Rating: D. This was all story but it really should have been Virgil pinning DiBiase, even on a rollup. These two would continue to feud with Virgil actually taking the Million Dollar Title at Summerslam 1991. The problem with Virgil was that after the DiBiase feud, there was nothing for him to do at all. The match was really dull and didn’t have the payoff it needed at the end.

DiBiase puts Virgil in the Million Dollar Dream post match but Piper hits him with the crutch to break it up. Queen Sherri comes out to help with a beatdown of Piper, as she is now managing DiBiase. Referees come out to break it up until Virgil makes the save. Virgil tells Piper to get up, as Piper had told him over the last few months.

We get a clip of Slaughter and General Adnan burning a Hogan t-shirt.

Slaughter threatens to get himself disqualified to keep the title. We get a clip of Slaughter beating up Hogan and Duggan as Slaughter laughs evily.

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Tito chases him around to start and beats him up a bit, only to get caught in the ribs with Mountie’s shock stick, ending this in less than 90 seconds.

Hogan gives his prematch interview, talking about how much he loves AMERICA and how he’s got new weapons. We get a clip of Slaughter and Adnan beating Hogan down but he promises to do it for his country.

Here are the celebrities: Regis is on commentary, Marla Maples is the timekeeper and Alex Trebek is ring announcer.

WWF World Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan immediately chases Slaughter around the ring until Adnan is put on the floor. Feeling out process to start with both guys going into the corner. Hulk hooks a headlock to no avail but sends Slaughter backwards with a shoulder block. The champ hits one of the weakest chair shots you’ll ever see to Hogan’s back and pokes Hulk in the eye to finally take over. Hogan comes back with a clothesline and decks Adnan for fun too. A backdrop puts Slaughter down and Hulk sends him into the post.

Hogan hits a jumping knee to the back to send Slaughter into the corner and a slingshot sends Slaughter into the buckle again. Hogan gets in his ten punches in the corner for two but goes to the middle rope of all places, but Adnan breaks it up. Slaughter gets slammed down and Hulk drops a bunch of elbows. Now Hogan goes up top (!) but gets slammed to the mat and clotheslined to the floor. A better but still lame chair shot puts Hogan down again and it’s time to work on the back.

A backbreaker gets two for the champion and he stomps away on Hulk’s back. There’s a Boston Crab but Hulk is right next to the rope, making this pretty worthless. Another backbreaker gets two and it’s a third chair shot, this time to the head, gets two more. Hulk is cut over the eye. There’s Slaughter’s Camel Clutch but Hulk fights up, only to be rammed into the corner to send him right back down. Slaughter puts an Iraqi flag on Hogan and you know what’s coming now. A Hulk Up, big boot and leg drop later and AMERICA REIGNS AGAIN!

Rating: C. At the end of the day, if you didn’t know what was going to happen here then you’re either very young or have no idea how wrestling works. On top of the story, it’s Hogan in a match against a big man. What else could you possibly expect? Hogan winning is the 100% right decision and the match certainly isn’t bad. Slaughter was clearly a short term champion and there’s nothing wrong with that either. Decent stuff here and a feel good moment to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Oddly enough, this wasn’t too bad. There’s some lame stuff but for the most part it’s very short with only Jake vs. Martel being both bad and longer than five minutes. Other than that you get a very fun opener, a masterpiece in the retirement match, a feel good main event and some other solid stuff. If you shave off about half an hour of this, which could easily be done by dropping about three matches, this show goes WAY up in value. Still though, it’s worth checking out if you haven’t seen it in a long time.

Ratings Comparison

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Original: B

Redo: B

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Original: F

Redo: D

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Original: F

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+

Redo: A

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

Original: W (For What were they thinking)

Redo: D+

Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-

Redo: C

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Original: N/A

Redo: F+

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: C-

Redo: D

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Original: C+

Redo: C

Overall Rating

Original: C

Redo: B-

These things need to be different already.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/14/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-7-wrestlemania-goes-patriotic/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania VI
Date: April 1, 1990
Location: SkyDome, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 67,678
Commentators: Jesse Ventura, Gorilla Monsoon

Time for another historic main event and in this case it’s probably Hogan’s best match ever. After Hogan basically beat every heel in the company, the only thing left to do was to have someone new come into the main event. At the Royal Rumble, only Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior were left in the ring at one point. The fans erupted and we had Wrestlemania 6. That’s the only match of note on the card so let’s get to it.

The opening video is set in space with a bunch of constellations. Vince does a voiceover and talks about how the two strongest beings in the universe are Hogan and Warrior. That’s different if nothing else.

Robert Goulet sings O Canada.

Rick Martel vs. Koko B. Ware

Martel is now a model and THE RING CARTS ARE BACK!!! Rick jumps Koko to start things off and the beating is on fast. Koko comes out of the corner with a cross body for two and a dropkick to stagger Martel even more. Martel heads to the floor, only to be dragged right back in. He sends Koko to the floor though and things slow down a bit. Rick pounds away on the back and hits a middle rope shot to the back. A backbreaker looks to set up the Boston Crab but Koko makes the rope. Some rams into the corner don’t work because Koko is black you see. A middle rope cross body misses and this time the Crab ends Ware.

Rating: D+. Not much of an opener here but it was decent enough I guess. This would have been a dark match today I would guess. The interesting thing here is what you got on the clipped version. On that edition, the first Boston Crab was clipped to the ending of the second one. See how dangerous that stuff can be?

Gene is with the tag team champions Haku and Andre (the Colossal Connection), calling the Colostomy Connection. Heenan: “Well if you want to talk evacuation….” They say they’ll beat Demolition. Gene: “The Colossal Connection: they’re anything but regular guys.”

Demolition says they’re going to take out the Connection and take the titles. Ax wants to chop them down like trees while Smash wants to put them in a tractor trailer and push them over a cliff. Our heroes ladies and gentlemen!

Tag Titles: Colossal Connection vs. Demolition

Only the challengers get an entrance. Andre is old and banged up here but they gave him a token title at the end of his career. The champions, the Connection, takes over to start as it’s Haku vs. Smash to get us going. Off to Ax to pound away but Andre comes in to break it up. Smash will have none of that and the beating continues on Haku with the challengers taking turns on him.

Haku and Smash fight over a backslide for awhile until Andre breaks it up. Demolition keeps control though and Haku gets beaten on even more. Andre finally cheats enough to let the give the champions the advantage. The giant headbutts Ax from the apron for a very delayed two before Haku rams Ax’s head into Andre’s head for two more. This was during the time when Andre would be officially in for about 15 seconds which was all he was capable of anymore.

Off to the Tongan nerve hold by Haku for a bit before Andre chokes in the corner. Andre hasn’t actually been in the match yet. A shoulder breaker gets two for Haku but he misses a charge into the corner. Hot tag brings in Smash to clean house and a flying forearm gets two. Everything breaks down and Andre is taken down by a double clothesline. Haku accidentally superkicks Andre into the ropes and the Decapitator gives Demolition their third tag titles.

Rating: C-. This was decent stuff but it was basically a handicap match. Andre was just too old to do much else after this and I don’t think he ever had another match in the WWF. Demolition would go on to have a summer long reign before turning heel and losing the titles to the now face Hart Foundation. Decent stuff here and the fans loved it.

Heenan, ever the brilliant man, yells at Andre and SLAPS HIM IN THE FACE! Andre grabs him by the face and smacks him around, blocks Haku’s superkick like it’s a baby’s hand, knocks Haku into the ring cart, changes his mind and kicks Haku out of the cart and leaves to a huge ovation. This was a good way to go out for Andre as he showed he could still beat up a lot of people with ease. Good stuff.

Jimmy Hart thinks there’s going to be an earthquake in Toronto. Earthquake is ready for Hercules.

Hercules vs. Earthquake

Earthquake misses a charge into the corner to start and Hercules pounds away on him. The big man heads to the floor before coming back in for a test of strength. Hercules goes down almost immediately and Earthquake is in control. The non-disaster comes back with some clotheslines but for reasons of general stupidity, Hercules tries a torture rack which goes as well as you would expect on someone who weighs 468. Two Earthquakes end Hercules.

Rating: D. Quick and easy here as Earthquake was clearly being built up as a huge monster for either Hogan or Warrior. He could certainly move very quickly for a guy his size and he had the talking ability to back it up. Earthquake is often forgotten as a quality monster which is a shame because the guy was pretty awesome.

Some celebrity interviewer is with Liz who says she’ll be around more often in the future from now on. Not really but whatever.

Brutus Beefcake thinks Mr. Perfect’s record looks pretty good. Tonight, he’s going to make it imperfect.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

This is one of the biggest matches on the card. Beefcake starts fast and punches Perfect to the floor with a single right hand. Back in and another punch sends Perfect flying over the top rope again. Brutus pounds away some more and Perfect gets to do his over the top bumping. A running clothesline puts Perfect down and Beefcake calls for the sleeper as Mary Tyler Moore of all people is here.

Perfect’s manager the Genius (the original Damien Sandow. They both even did cartwheels) slides in his metal scroll to Perfect and a shot to the head gives Mr. control. Perfect pounds away with some slow shots to the chest but the fans are staying into this. Beefcake comes back with the required slingshot into the required head first into the post bump by Perfect which is enough for the win out of nowhere.

Rating: C-. The crowd carried this one as Beefcake wasn’t a great worker but he had more charisma than he knew what to do with. Perfect was a leading candidate to face Hogan here so he was certainly a top heel. The match wasn’t great but it was more than enough to fire the crowd up again here. Granted the crowd is already white hot so no complaints here.

Post match Brutus goes to cut Perfect’s hair but Genius steals the clippers. Beefcake chases down the worthless Genius for a sleeper and a haircut. Brutus’ SWEET music is playing the whole time on top of that.

Now it’s time for one of the weirdest matches you’ll ever see. We recap Bad News Brown vs. Roddy Piper which started with a double elimination and a brawl at the Rumble. That’s all well and good. We go to Piper in the back where Piper says some people call him Hot Rod but then he turns around to show that half of his body is painted black. That side is called Hot Scot and you can hear the racial issues building from here. Apparently it was something about Michael Jackson.

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

An interesting point here is that both guys are legit black belts in judo with Brown being an Olympic bronze medalist in the sport. They immediately take it to the mat in a fist fight until Piper gets two off a cross body of all things. The referee (former heel wrestler Danny Davis) keeps separating them so Brown takes over by sending Piper’s head into the buckle. He yells at Piper for trying to be black and it’s off to a nerve hold.

Brown slugs him down a few times and drops an elbow for two. Somewhere in there a buckle pad is ripped off and it’s Brown going chest first into said buckle. Piper pulls out a single white glove (Brown wore a single black one) and a bunch of punches send Brown to the floor. Piper swings a chair but hits the post and it’s a double countout.

Rating: D. Instead of a brawl or something entertaining, this was much more of a bizarre spectacle than anything else. Brown would be gone soon after this while Piper would shift into the broadcast booth to take over for Jesse. The fight was a lot weaker because of how much stuff there was to distract from the action which is never a good thing.

Steve Allen, former host of the Tonight Show, is playing a piano in the bathroom as the Bolsheviks rehearse the Russian national anthem. Jokes are made and they’re not that funny.

Hart Foundation vs. Bolsheviks

National anthem, Canadian assault, Hart Attack to Boris, pin in about 20 seconds.

Go to Mania 7 in Los Angeles where there will be over 100,000 fans! Or not because of “terrorism threats” so we’re going to a smaller place! Pay no attention to the fact that it was reported that Vince couldn’t sell the place out so they moved the event!

Tito is ready for Barbarian and Heenan.

The Barbarian vs. Tito Santana

This is Bobby Heenan’s debut as Barbarian’s manager. Barbarian takes him into the corner to start but Tito comes back with punches to send Barbie to the floor. Back in and a big hip toss puts Tito down but Santana comes back with right hands to the head for two. They run the ropes and Barbarian kicks Santana’s head off to take over. When all else fails, kick the other guy in the face.

Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow but Tito can’t take him down with a dropkick. The flying forearm takes Barbarian down but Heenan puts his foot on the rope. Barbarian slugs him down and goes up top for a BIG clothesline off the top (and a SWEET bump from Tito) for the pin.

Rating: C-. The shot at the end makes up for most of the match sucking. Tito looked like he was dead out there and the flip backwards made it look even better. This was just a way to set up Barbarian as a singles guy which went absolutely nowhere. The guy stayed employed over the years if nothing else though so he’s got something up on a lot of people. Tito was officially a jobber to the stars at this point.

We recap Dusty/Sapphire vs. Macho/Sherri. This started at the Rumble where Brother Love insulted Sapphire and a brawl broke out with Savage and Rhodes. Sherri started attacking Rhodes on TV and a fourway brawl broke out there too.

Rhodes and Sapphire are ready for the mixed tag and say they have the crown jewel, whatever that is.

Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Queen Sherri/Randy Savage

Savage is the King at this point. This is the first mixed tag in company history according to Fink. I don’t know if that’s true but I don’t know of another preceding it. Dusty and Sapphire are introduced at 465lbs. Jesse: “Are you telling me Dusty only weighs 200?” Dusty says cut the music because he’s got the crown jewel: Elizabeth. Savage FREAKS (I think. It’s kind of hard to tell with him) and Jesse is on one of his famous rants.

The genders have to match here so the guys start things off. Sherri tries to interfere but Sapphire makes the save. Dusty throws Sherri into Savage and we’re off to the women. Sapphire shakes her hips into Sherri and hooks an airplane spin for bad measure. Sherri tries a slam which goes as well as you would expect it to. Off to the men again with Sapphire getting in a few slaps from the apron.

The guys go to the floor but Savage runs back in for a top rope ax handle to the floor. He hits it again for good measure but Sapphire gets in the way of the third jump. Back in and Randy hits a suplex for two and drops Rhodes with a shot to the head with the scepter. Sherri hits a top rope splash for two on Dusty because the rules don’t matter I guess. Everything breaks down with Sapphire taking over on Sherri. Liz sends Sherri back inside and it’s a schoolgirl win for Sapphire on the Queen.

Rating: D. Another mess here that was there more for the spectacle than anything else. Most of this show isn’t that good all around and this was another good example. Sapphire continues to be pretty much there as a sight gag but thankfully she would be gone later on in the summer. Not much to see here for the most part.

Liz, Sapphire and Dusty dance.

Another Mania 7 ad.

Bobby Heenan is nearly speechless over Andre beating him up.

Rona Barrett is your usual celebrity that is out of place on a wrestling show.

Savage and Sherri freak out a lot.

Demolition celebrates their title win. This must be intermission. They’re ready for the Hart Foundation.

Now we get one of those famous interviews that is still talked about today. Hogan talks about getting energy from all of the Hulkamaniacs and says that THIS is where the power lies. He’s going to get Warrior down on his knees and ask him if he wants to live forever. Apparently he and the Hulkamaniacs can bring all of the Little Warriors into the light. Hogan: “It doesn’t matter whether you win or whether you lose.” He’s already setting the stage for the loss.

Warrior throws Sean Mooney away, saying Sean doesn’t deserve to breathe his air. He goes on one of his usual rants about how no one can live forever but Hogan’s beliefs can live through him. He talks about darkness and beliefs that come with any and all challenges. Tonight is about merging the Hulkamaniacs and the Warriors together. Warrior may be insane, but he’s really not that much worse than Hogan when you think about it.

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Jannetty and Tanaka start things off and the Rockers take over with their usual speed stuff. Double teaming sends the Express out to the floor before things settle down a bit. Mr. Fuji hooks the top rope, sending Marty out to the floor. Back in again and Jannetty escapes a backdrop and makes the tag off to Shawn. A double superkick puts Tanaka down so it’s off to Sato. Tanaka kicks Shawn in the back and the Rockers are in trouble again.

A gutbuster gets two for Tanaka and a big kick to the face puts Shawn down again. Sato hits a top rope knee drop and it’s off to a nerve hold. Shawn comes back with a big old clothesline and a diving tag to Marty. Things speed up and we get some heel miscommunication. A big backdrop puts Tanaka down but Fuji breaks up the double fist. Marty goes after him and gets salt in the eyes for his efforts. He stumbles into the barricade and that’s a countout.

Rating: C+. Decent tag match here which would be topped by about a mile at the Rumble. These guys needed more time than this and a better finish to be awesome so this one was just ok. The Rockers would start getting awesome in a hurry after this with nearly two years before their famous split. The Express would only have a handful of PPV matches ever and this is the most recent that I’ve seen.

Rhythm and Blues are in the back with Steve Allen cracking jokes at their expense. Greg Valentine as a guitar playing rocker is just wrong.

Dino Bravo vs. Jim Duggan

These two feuded for a long time. Earthquake is here with Dino, sending Gorilla into a rant about how you can’t be a wrestler and a manager. Kazarian would disagree. Jesse brings up how stupid it is to bring an American flag to Canada (against a Canadian at that). This is power vs. power and AMERICAN power takes over early on, sending Bravo out to the floor.

Back in and Duggan misses a charge into the buckle and Dino slugs him down. Jesse: “I don’t like Hacksaw.” Gorilla: “Why not?” Jesse: “He’s so ugly.” Jim comes back with three clotheslines but has to fight off Earthquake. In the distraction he hits Bravo with the board for the pin.

Rating: D. Another filler match, another match that sucked. Duggan was there to get crushed by Earthquake post match. Bravo was a decent lackey and midcard heel for people to beat up, but as usual he was going to lose no matter what he did out there. Except to Ronnie Garvin last year because Garvin sucks.

Duggan gets crushed by Earthquake post match.

We recap DiBiase vs. Roberts. Ted choked him out in MAY and then six months later Jake came after him. I’ve heard of slow builds but this is ridiculous. Roberts held up the belt and that’s about it.

Roberts says he’s going to make Ted beg for mercy.

Million Dollar Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Jake Roberts

DiBiase is quickly sent to the floor as Jesse criticizes Gorilla’s hot dog consumption. The DDT is escaped twice and Ted takes a breather on the floor. Back in and Jake grabs a hammerlock before driving some knees into the arm. Off to another hammerlock as Gorilla starts talking anatomy. Jake has to chase off Virgil though and Ted gets in a shot as Roberts comes back in. Roberts misses a running knee lift and Ted takes over.

Off to a front facelock by DiBiase as the fans are doing The Wave. It goes on for a good while as Ted sends Roberts’ arm into the post. A piledriver puts Jake down but DiBiase doesn’t cover. Off to the Million Dollar Dream for a bit but Jake gets his foot on the ropes. Jake comes back with an atomic drop and a clothesline followed by a backdrop for no cover. The DDT is loaded up but Virgil makes a save, pulling Jake to the floor when the referee isn’t looking. They head to the floor where the Million Dollar Dream is put on again. Jake sends DiBiase into the post but Ted gets back inside anyway to retain.

Rating: C-. This match took a long time to get going but the crowd was into this match for the most part. Apparently DiBiase wins the title even on a countout because this is a non-sanctioned belt. Gorilla thinks DiBiase doesn’t deserve the title because he didn’t earn it, but Jesse says Ted does because Ted paid for it. Point to Jesse.

Jake beats up Virgil and DiBiase because he can with Ted taking a DDT. Roberts shoves some money in Ted’s mouth for fun.

Slick says life is all about money so he’s happy that DiBiase has paid off Akeem to take out Big Boss Man. DiBiase had asked Boss Man to get the belt back from Roberts but since there was no crime, Boss Man turned face for being offered a bribe.

Boss Man doesn’t have much to say.

Big Boss Man vs. Akeem

Boss Man’s face as he rides to the ring is almost scary. DiBiase is waiting at ringside and jumps Boss Man before the bell. Wait apparently it did ring but the referee didn’t care. Good to know. Anyway Akeem pounds away on Boss Man but gets caught in an atomic drop out of the corner. The Boss Man Slam ends this in less than two minutes.

The fans don’t care about Rhythm and Blues.

Mary Tyler Moore likes Wrestlemania.

Here’s Rhythm and Blues to perform Hunka Hunka Hunka Honky Love. The only thing of note here is future WCW World Champion Diamond Dallas Page as the man driving the pink Cadillac into the arena. The Bushwhackers pop up in vendor costumes to beat up the band and break guitars.

The attendance record is announced: 67,678.

Rick Rude vs. Jimmy Snuka

Rude now has straight hair and is all tough instead of being a comedy guy. Steve Allen comes in to do commentary for no apparent reason. Snuka takes over to start with some shots to the head, only to have Rude suplex him down with ease to take over. Jimmy comes back by ramming Rude’s face into the mat, only to get poked in the eye for his efforts. Snuka misses something off the top and jumps into a punch to the ribs. The Rude Awakening ends this quick.

Rating: D. This was there to set up Rude as a threat to the new champion after the main event tonight. That would lead to Summerslam and a main event title match, but that would be about it for Rude in the WWF. Snuka wouldn’t do much here at all and was a total jobber to the stars after this one.

We recap Hogan vs. Warrior. They wound up being the only two guys in the ring at one point in the Rumble and the reaction to their fight was great. They then had some run-ins on SNME and the Main Event and that’s about it. This is much more about a battle of respect and they certainly don’t hate each other.

WWF World Title/Intercontinental Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior

This is title for title. It’s one of those matches where both guys are built up to the point that neither can lose and the fans are completely split on who they want to win. That’s REALLY hard to pull off and I don’t remember a better execution of something like this ever before. The shot of Warrior on the ropes doing his pose as Hogan comes to the ring still sends chills up my back.

They stare each other down and both guys shove the other into the corner. We get the famous test of strength with Warrior taking over to start. Jesse is STUNNED but Hogan fights back up and takes Warrior down to his knees, giving us one of the most popular .gif’s in the history of the internet (implied oral sex if you’re not familiar). Hogan trips Warrior down and drops an elbow for one but Warrior pops up and no sells a slam. Warrior slams Hogan down and clotheslines him to the floor where Hogan might have hurt his knee.

Back in and the brawl is on with Hogan’s knee being fine and not ever mentioned again. Hulk takes over and pounds away at Warrior’s head before getting two off a pair of elbow drops. Off to a front facelock and a small package for two. Hogan hooks a chinlock and pounds away on Ultimate’s head. After a brief break we’re right back to the chinlock followed by a belly to back suplex for two for Hulk.

There’s chinlock #3 and you’re not likely to ever hear the fans freak out as much from someone fighting out of a chinlock as you get here for Warrior. A double clothesline puts both guys down and Hebner counts VERY slowly, which is the right idea here. Warrior grabs the ropes and starts Warrioring Up before hitting some clotheslines. A suplex gets two for Warrior and it’s off to a bearhug on Hulk.

Hogan fights out of the hold with some solid rights to the head but on the breakup, the referee is taken down. Warrior hits a pair of ax handles off the top and starts to get fired up. The shoulder block misses though and Hulk drives him head first into the mat, but there’s no referee. Warrior suplexes Hogan down but there’s still no count. A rollup gets a VERY close two for Hogan and it’s time for the punches.

An elbow sends Warrior out to the floor and Hogan gets posted. Back in and Warrior snaps off some clotheslines followed by the gorilla press into the splash. That gets two and it’s time to Hulk Up. Hogan pounds away and hits the big boot, but the legdrop misses. Warrior hits a fast splash for the surprise pin to win the title and shock the world.

Rating: A. That’s likely high but the crowd here REALLY helps this one. This is a match that just works and there’s almost no other way to put it. I don’t think there’s much of an argument over this not being Hogan’s best match ever and it’s easily Warrior’s first or second best ever depending on your taste about next year’s entry. Either way, this is a great match and one of those matches you have to see at some point as part of being a fan.

Hogan hands Warrior the belt and leaves in the cart, partially stealing the spotlight but it’s not as bad as I remember.

Overall Rating: C+. This is one of those shows that is completely dependent on the main event. Other than that there’s almost nothing here at all, although there’s nothing that horrible. It’s mainly a big group of random(ish) matches with stories to most of them, but almost none of them are anything of note. Still though, it’s pretty fun stuff overall and the main event is must see. It’s not a great show or anything but it’s worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Rick Martel vs. Koko B. Ware

Original: D

Redo: D+

Demolition vs. Colossal Connection

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Earthquake vs. Hercules

Original: D-

Redo: D

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C

Redo: C-

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

Original: A

Redo: D

Hart Foundation vs. Bolsheviks

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Barbarian vs. Tito Santana

Original: D

Redo: C-

Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Randy Savage/Sensational Sherri

Original: D-

Redo: D

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Original: C

Redo: C+

Jim Duggan vs. Dino Bravo

Original: D+

Redo: D

Ted Dibiase vs. Jake Roberts

Original: C

Redo: C-

Big Boss Man vs. Akeem

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Rick Rude vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: C-

Redo: D

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: A+

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: C+

I’m surprised by that Bad News/Piper match more than anything else.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/13/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-6-epitome-of-a-one-match-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

King of the Ring 1993
Date: June 13, 1993
Location; Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bobby Heenan, Randy Savage

Back when I was starting doing reviews, one of the first series I checked out was King of the Ring. Looking back at them, much like most of my original reviews, these things are HORRIBLE so it’s time I do them again and make them a bit more polished. We’ll start back in 1993, with of course the tournament itself and the rematch from Wrestlemania IX with Hulk Hogan defending the World Title against Yokozuna in an actually announced match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a rundown of the brackets:

Bret Hart

Razor Ramon

Mr. Perfect

Mr. Hughes

Jim Duggan

Bam Bam Bigelow

Tatanka

Lex Luger

If you can’t figure out the winner from here, you’re not paying close enough attention.

The announcers make a huge deal out of this being the Heartland of America. This was almost the tagline for the show.

All first round matches have fifteen minute time limits.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Bret Hart vs. Razor Ramon

Bret had a first round bye and Ramon beat Tito Santana. This is just after Ramon lost to the 1-2-3 Kid so you know what the fans are chanting. JR sounds extra excited tonight. Bret is announced as the #1 seed, which (in theory though never actually stated) means Ramon should be the #8 seed, putting him beneath guys like Mr. Hughes and Jim Duggan. Really? I don’t think a single loss would drop him that far down.

JR mentions that Bret is a two time Tag Team and Intercontinental Champion and would like to make it a triple double. That’s a very rare reference to the other King of the Ring tournaments that took place before the show aired on PPV or any TV whatsoever as far as I know. This is also somewhat connected to the King’s Crown title, held by people such as Jim Duggan and Harley Race. That was introduced when Race won the second King of the Ring tournament in 1986, but the King’s Crown winners had nothing to do with the King of the Ring. Bret is actually the defending King here, having won the last tournament in 1991.

Hart cranks on a headlock to start and they have a bit of miscommunication off an Irish whip but it doesn’t screw up much. They hit the mat with Bret cranking on the arm as you can hear the energy in JR here. He’s snapping off Hart Family facts and the brackets as only Ross can in these situations. Ramon scores with a hard clothesline but Bret goes right back to the arm to keep control. Nice power vs. technical story here so far.

Razor fights up again but gets caught in yet another armbar. Well he’s consistent if nothing else. Bret charges into a boot and gets thrown shoulder first into the post to finally change control. Back in and Razor stomps in the hands and slaps Bret in the back of the head. Fall away slam gets two as the crowd is staying uninterested so far. A powerslam gets two for Razor, which doesn’t make the most sense given that he had Bret in perfect position for a shoulder breaker to stay on the bad arm.

The Canadian avoids some elbows and starts up the Five Moves of Doom but gets sent chest first into the buckle. The Razor’s Edge is countered as Bret kicks off the ropes into a small package for a VERY close two and the fans wake up to boo the referee. Razor loads up a belly to back superplex but Bret turns onto him for the pin to advance.

Rating: B-. This was fine but I would have liked the arm stuff to actually go somewhere. It’s still a good match though as you had Bret working hard out there. However, you can see the major problems with tournament shows: it’s kind of hard to get into the flow of a match when your matches have to be crammed into a pretty short time limit. You also can’t let the guys do everything they need to do in one match because you might need to save stuff for later.

We recap Mr. Hughes and Giant Gonzalez teaming up to take Undertaker’s urn. This would be one of the earlier instances of the 19,284 times this story took place. It did however include a great looking urn shot to Paul Bearer’s head.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Mr. Hughes vs. Mr. Perfect

Hughes, a career bodyguard (almost literally. Once he switched to that gimmick, he didn’t change a thing for the rest of his career, which last I heard is still going on in the indies), beat Kamala while Mr. Perfect took three times to beat Doink the Clown. Perfect is in a short lived face run here and takes Hughes down with an armdrag as we can see some empty seats pretty close to the ring. Heenan talks about all the things he did for Perfect to make him great and takes credit for the success he’s had. Ross in that deadpan voice of his: “Wrong.”

The big Hughes takes him down and cranks on the neck before just kicking Perfect in the jaw. Simple yet effective move for a simple yet effective character. Back to the neck crank and we get a quick word from Bret where he says he’d rather face Perfect for the wrestling abilities. It’s very rare that someone actually has a preference for their opponent but it makes sense for Bret. That’s not something you get in today’s wrestling and I’d love to see it more. Hughes crotches himself on the ropes and gets backdropped down, setting up the neck snap. That’s enough for Hughes though as he blasts Perfect with the urn for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Again, there’s only so much you can do when the winner is obvious and your opponent is Mr. Hughes. There’s nothing wrong with him as an enforcer, but did anyone buy him as a potential winner here? The ending makes sense too as you had to keep him strong for Undertaker, but that didn’t do this match any favors. Perfect looked great here though and there was some serious money in a face run with him as the awesome athlete who could wrestle a great match with almost anyone.

Mr. Fuji says Hogan cheated at Wrestlemania by taking advantage of Yokozuna after a twenty minute match. Apparently being an evil Japanese man takes away your ability to tell time. Yokozuna promises BANZAI.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Jim Duggan

Duggan beat Papa Shango and Bigelow defeated Typhoon. This is in Duggan’s weird looking singlet phase. They slug it out to start as Heenan calls Duggan’s career with the Atlanta Falcons an amateur run. Bigelow gets knocked to the floor but comes back in to use the power of fat to avoid being slammed. Duggan’s ribs are hurt so we hit the bearhug. That goes nowhere, so Duggan hurts his ribs trying to slam Bigelow and gets caught in a bearhug.

Heenan tries to pepper things up by talking about Duggan being a quitter in Glenn’s Falls, New York but it’s not quite as good as hearing about the Duggan family history of fighting in taped fist matches in WCW. Seriously. The third attempt at a slam works but Duggan misses a charge into the corner, setting up the flying headbutt to give Bigelow the pin.

Rating: D-. This was horrible as Duggan was WAY past his expiration date, but to be fair this was his next to last match in the WWF, save for a one off Superstars squash. Bigelow wasn’t the guy he used to be but he was still good enough as a monster to put people over. Thankfully they kept this short and did what they were supposed to do, even though the match sucked.

The Smoking Gunns and the Steiner Brothers are ready for their eight man tag later. That match is just there to give the fans a breather after the World Title match and there’s nothing wrong with that.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

Luger beat Bob Backlund and Tatanka beat Giant Gonzalez (by DQ of course) and both guys are undefeated coming in. Luger is forced to put a pad on his forearm with a metal plate inside. Tatanka tries to break up the posing but gets sent over the top like a schmuck. That’s fine with him as he just turns the mirror over and starts chopping. A big chop sends Luger to the floor before hitting every stereotypical face move you can think of. Makes sense for a stereotypical character.

We hit the armbar as JR and Heenan argue over names. JR: “I never figured out why they call you Brain.” Heenan: “Well why do they call you Jim Ross?” Tatanka stays on the arm so Savage puts over the tournament by saying the winner is equal to the WWF Champion. Yeah it’s a stretch, but you have to say things like that to make people think they’re watching something very important. Bigelow pops in to say he wants to face Tantaka.

The hammerlock stays on until Luger uses the free arm for an elbow to the jaw. Luger starts in on the ribs with a backbreaker and some slow motion elbows for two. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Tatanka’s back and Luger brags to Heenan. They trade some rollups for two each with Heenan stopping to look at the crowd time after time. It’s almost like he’s trying to kill the clock. We hit four minutes to go and Tatanka goes on the warpath. Rating

A bunch of chops get two on Luger and a powerslam gets the same. Tatanka hits a top rope chop to the head for the closest near fall yet as the fans wake up a bit. He misses a high cross body though and we’re at two minutes left. Luger hits a powerslam of his own for two but really doesn’t seem interested in picking up the pace. There’s a suplex for a delayed two and Luger is frustrated. Luger backbreakers him for two more and time runs out in an anti-climactic ending.

Rating: D. When Luger isn’t trying, it’s one of the most painful things you can see. Tatanka is a fine midcard gimmick but he went about as far as he could have ever gone. This is how you keep two guys strong though and get the required bye. That’s one thing I’ve never understood though: if you want to save time, why let one match go the time limit? Just do two faster matches with a fluke ending. Doesn’t that balance things out? This would also be Luger’s last major appearance before turning face as the new Mr. USA, so it might be better that he didn’t have a great performance here.

Luger wants five more minutes but uses the distraction to knock Tatanka out with the forearm.

Here are the updated brackets:

Bret Hart

Mr. Perfect

Bam Bam Bigelow

BYE

Okerlund is with Hart and Perfect and of course Gene starts making trouble. He thinks Hart wants to face Perfect because it’s an easier opponent. Perfect owes him one for Summerslam 1991 and it turns into an argument over whose father would win in a match. Stu’s in ring career really isn’t talked about that much due to his success as a trainer so that’s kind of an odd thing to think about.

King of the Ring Semifinals: Mr. Perfect vs. Bret Hart

So this is a pretty well known match. Thirty minute time limit here and Bret has a taped up hand from Razor stomping on the fingers earlier. They go to the ropes to start and you can see fans leaving to get food. You horrible people. An early hiptoss sends Perfect flying and they hit the mat for some counters. Perfect gets back up and rips Bret’s skin off with a chop in the corner.

Bret kicks him away and we hit the mat for a hard headlock from the Hitman. Perfect fights up for a crucifix but gets pulled right back into the headlock. After several moments, Perfect gets to his feet and drives a knee into the ribs to send Bret outside. He’s nice enough to hold the ropes open but kicks Bret as he comes back in. Some hard kicks to the head have Bret in more trouble and Perfect is clearly wrestling as the heel here.

Hart rolls outside and Perfect whips him hard into the barricade, right next to a cooler full of water and Diet Pepsi. Bret might have hurt his knee but you never can tell with him. Back in and a suplex and missile dropkick get two for Perfect and frustration starts to set in. That means bad things for Bret as Perfect gets more aggressive with the chops in the corner. Mr. goes up again but gets superplexed down for a close two as the fans are into this one.

Bret’s knee is ok (to be fair it wasn’t too hurt in the first place and Perfect didn’t follow up on it) and he goes after Perfect’s leg, setting up a figure four in the middle of the ring. A long crawl gets him over to the ropes but Bret takes him back into the middle again and cranks on the knee. Perfect escapes that as well and just throws Bret down by the hair. We hit the sleeper on Bret but again he’s too close to the ropes. Perfect makes sure to hold until four like a villain is supposed to do.

Unlike a villain though, he puts the hold back on, wisely turning Bret away from the ropes. Perfect even throws his own foot on the ropes to channel his inner Flair. Hart gets up and sends Perfect face first into the top turnbuckle before just blasting him with a European uppercut. Now it’s Bret throwing him down by the hair, sending Perfect into the post for that signature bump of his. Russian legsweep gets two for Hart and we hit the Five Moves of Doom.

Perfect smartens up again and grabs the injured hand to block the Sharpshooter with Heenan saying he taught Perfect to do that. Bret blocks a PerfectPlex attempt and suplexes Perfect over the top, sending them into a huge crash on the floor. Both guys get back in but Perfect goldbricks a knee injury and tries a small package, only to have Bret show him how it’s done and reverse into a small package of him own for the pin, despite Perfect’s shoulder clearly being up.

Rating: A. I think I like Bret’s chemistry with Perfect better than his stuff with Shawn. These two just compliment each other so well and their styles mesh, shall I say, perfectly. This is outstanding stuff with Perfect going old school and trying to cheat to win, only to get caught using one of Bret’s tactics and getting pinned as a result. Trading knee injuries here was good stuff and the whole match is just great. Check it out and watch Summerslam 1991 while you’re at it.

Perfect is livid with the referee but shakes Bret’s hand post match.

So it’s Bret vs. Bigelow for the crown.

Hulk Hogan is ready for Yokozuna and cuts the same promo you’ve heard him use for about ten years now. Manager Jimmy Hart doesn’t like Fuji and Yokozuna putting down America though. Hart as Hogan’s manager never fit for me and they never really gave a good explanation for why they were suddenly best friends. Of note here though, a lot of Jimmy’s lines would be in the American Made song that he performed for Hogan in WCW.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna

Hogan is defending in the Wrestlemania IX rematch. Ross, doing his job as a commentator, points out all of the Japanese photographers at ringside for this match. Keep that in mind. Heenan mentions Hogan trimming down, which is code for steroid trial. That’s an understatement too as Hogan is probably 40lbs lighter than usual. Yokozuna stalls a lot as Hogan starts talking about Hogan being a coward as only he can. Hogan shoves him back a foot or two and Yokozuna shoves him into the corner with ease.

Some martial arts chops have Hogan in early trouble as we hear about a methodical pace. I’d rather do that than have Yokozuna blow up three minutes into the match. A whip into the corner sets up Hogan grabbing the foot, as is his custom. Yokozuna misses a charge in the corner and Hogan starts hammering away. Savage says the fans would pop if Hogan slammed him. That’s quite the rare term.

The slam doesn’t work though and Savage is in shock. Instead he tries some All American right hands (trademark Jim Ross) but more slam attempts go just as badly as the first. Even more right hands have Yokozuna staggered but he puts Hogan down with a clothesline. The big fat splash misses though and both guys are in trouble. Hogan gets up and bounces off Yokozuna before we hit the bearhug. After nearly two minutes in the hold, Hogan punches his way to freedom (like an AMERICAN) but he runs into an elbow to the jaw.

A BIG belly to belly suplex gets two (and an even bigger kickout) and it’s Hulk Up time. Several right hands and three big boots finally put Yokozuna down. The legdrop connects and Yokozuna THROWS Hogan off of him, sending the fans from a frenzy to stunned silence faster than anything I’ve ever seen. In an ending that almost made me cry back in the day, a Japanese photographer (rumored to be Harvey Wippleman) gets up on the apron. His camera explodes in Hogan’s face, setting up a shot to the throat and the Hulkbuster legdrop to give Yokozuna the title back, shocking the crowd all over again.

Rating: D. And that’s it for Hulk Hogan in the WWF for nearly nine years. Other than a few house show matches in Europe that were barely ever mentioned, Hogan would be off to retirement for nearly a year until he went over to WCW. This was the first monster to destroy Hulkamania, meaning that whoever beat him would be the next big thing. In theory that should have been Luger (or Crush) but for some reason they didn’t pull the trigger on him at Summerslam like common sense would have said. Pretty big moment here and a big way to crush Hogan before he left the company.

Yokozuna Banzai Drops him post match and fans are stunned. Hogan may have been a relic in 1993, but this is similar to the Streak being broken: you would never believe it happened until you saw it.

Hogan is helped out and the remaining Japanese photographers take a lot of pictures. One more thing: after all the managers Hogan beat up over the years, it’s FUJI that takes him out?

Mr. Perfect promises to prove what perfect is all about in the future. Not exactly.

Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels and brand new (as in like a week ago) bodyguard Diesel (named for the first time here), who helped him win the title back from Marty Jannetty at a house show, say maybe lightning can strike twice, even though Michaels is a far bigger star than Hogan.

Steiner Brothers/Smoking Gunns vs. Money Inc./Headshrinkers

Total cool down match here and no one believes anything else. Money Inc. has the belts at this point. Scott Steiner and DiBiase get things going. How can Rikishi (Fatu here) be in the Hall of Fame but the Steiners aren’t? DiBiase armdrags him down to start but Steiner is fine with going amateur.

A dropkick puts Ted down and a clothesline puts him on the floor. Rick throws him back in and another clothesline sends Ted right back to the floor for a nice spot. He finally stays inside for a tag to Fatu but Bart dropkicks the Samoan down, setting up an armbar. Fatu no sells a faceplant and superkicks Bart right in the face. Heenan has a blast when JR mentions Billy going to college on a rodeo scholarship. You can’t give Heenan prime material like that.

The Headshrinkers double backdrop Bart for two but he gets the same off a sunset flip to IRS. A double clothesline allows for the hot tag to Billy as the crowd really doesn’t care. DiBiase catches Billy with a hot shot though and slaps on the Million Dollar Dream, sending Heenan into a chorus of Happy Trails. Ted lets go of the hold for some reason and gets small packaged out of nowhere for the pin.

Rating: D+. What a random ending with the Steiners not doing anything in the second half of the match. It sounded like they had to run out of there because of time or something and it made for a sudden ending. It could have been a lot worse, but this match was just there to give the fans something to see as they came out of their comas.

Mr. Fuji says America is finished but doesn’t like Okerlund bringing up anything about cameras.

Intercontinental Title: Crush vs. Shawn Michaels

Crush is challenging while on the role of a lifetime, which just kind of ended soon after this with Crush being knocked off TV for several months before returning as a heel. A big shoulder sends Shawn to the floor and we hit the headlock. With wrestling not working, Shawn just punches him in the jaw. Well that’s another way of going about it.

The champ grabs an armbar but misses the superkick and gets dropkicked out to the floor. Back in and Crush throws him around again before gorilla pressing him over his head with more than a few reps. Savage: “HE CAN SLAM YOKOZUNA!” A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker plants Michaels again but Diesel pulls him away from the head vice. Crush shows that all faces have to be stupid (though snappily dressed in orange, yellow and purple) by going after Diesel, allowing Shawn to knee him from the apron.

In a really painful looking spot, Shawn rams him head first into the post five straight times. Back in and Shawn fires off right hands to the head before putting on a front facelock. Crush eventually just throws him off to break the hold with some incredible looking power. Shawn’s top rope ax handle doesn’t work and a backbreaker gets two. A big boot and legdrop (brother) get the same for Crush and he clotheslines Shawn to the floor. Cue the cigar smoking Doinks for a distraction, allowing Shawn to superkick him in the back of the head to retain.

Rating: C. I liked this match more than I should have but I was a Crush fan back in the day. He was similar to Ryback’s push when he got to the top of the company: he was insanely strong, had a good look, and never actually won anything. Allegedly Vince was going back and forth on giving either Crush or Luger the Hogan push and went with Luger, which didn’t go all that well. Crush getting that run would have been very interesting to see, but I’m not sure if it would have worked in the end.

Bigelow says he’ll win.

King of the Ring: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Bret Hart

One hour time limit. Bret has a band hand and is still selling the knee from the Perfect match. JR says they’re out of satellite time in 25 minutes, which would put the show at 2:44 max. Bret tries to speed things up to start but has to counter a gorilla press attempt to put Bigelow on the mat. An armbar doesn’t get Bret anywhere as Bigelow just throws him out to the floor for a big crash.

Back in and Bigelow sends him back first into the buckle. I was expecting the chest bump there. Given that it’s Hart, that’s likely setting up something for later. That’s quickly proven correct as Bigelow goes for the back with some headbutts and forearms. More hard Irish whips have Bret reeling and we hit the bearhug. That goes nowhere so Bigelow just drops him with a belly to back. Bret’s selling is incredible here as he’s making every single move look like a bullet to the back.

They head outside again with Bret sending him into the barricade a few times, only to have Bigelow shrug it off and slam him on the concrete. Cue Bigelow chick Luna Vachon with a chair to Bret’s back, which is too much for Bret to survive. Bigelow throws him back inside for the top rope headbutt (clearly didn’t connect) and……that’s it as another referee comes in to explain the chair shot.

The match continues and you can almost hear Bret kill the referee for making him continue. Heenan is livid but Savage correctly points out that it should have been a DQ so Bigelow should be grateful. Bigelow hammers on the back and puts on a bearhug to keep up the psychology. Bret finally pulls him down into a DDT but Bigelow shrugs it off. A running backsplash misses but he whips Bret hard into the corner and Hart just falls down. There are FAR too many empty seats opposite the camera for the main event.

Bret counters an over the shoulder backbreaker into a sleeper but opts to dropkick him to the floor instead. A plancha sets up a bunch of right hands to the face cause Savage to spell pride p-r-y-d-e. Back in and Bret gets two off a middle rope clothesline and the middle rope elbow gets the same. Bam Bam just kicks off the Sharpshooter and we hit another bearhug, so Bret just bites out of it. Not liking being treated like a bowl of macaroni, Bigelow plants him with a powerslam for two. With frustration setting in, Bigelow puts him on the top rope but gets victory rolled for the pin and the crown.

Rating: B. It’s not a classic but this was a great performance from Hart as he went over forty five minutes tonight and didn’t have a really bad match in the whole bunch. Bigelow was really just a dragon to be slain but he had enough power that it sent Bret into some of his better selling.

The interesting thing here though is how this ending came back later. Think about it: the match is restarted, a guy gets his already weakened back worked on even more but gets caught by a sudden move for the pin. If that doesn’t ring a bell, think back to Wrestlemania XII and the overtime in the Iron Man match. It’s almost the exact same thing but with a victory roll instead of a superkick. Oddly enough, the ending to the regulation of that match is even more move for move to the end of their Survivor Series 1992 match. I wonder if that’s a Bret thing or just a REALLY big coincidence.

Anyway, Bret is rushed over for the coronation but Jerry Lawler shows up, trade some insults, gets annoyed by a Burger King chant and BLASTS him in the back with a scepter (actually injuring Bret’s back) and kicking off a feud that lasted over two years. Of note here: Bret looks really, REALLY stupid with a big golden crown on his head.

Overall Rating: C. This show is more memorable than good, but the question is which part is more memorable. Hogan losing is far more important historically, but Bret winning is the part people remember more than anything else. That being said, the show itself is just ok. Hart vs. Perfect is well worth checking out but the rest of the show is really nothing all that great. Check it out for historical purposes but that’s about it. Other than the classic of course.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania V
Date: April 2, 1989
Location: Trump Plaza, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 18,946
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

Given how this year’s (2013) Wrestlemania is more or less a sequel to last year’s, this is an appropriate show to get to. This is more or less the followup to Wrestlemania IV as Savage has snapped on Hogan, claiming that Hulk is jealous of the title and all that jazz. That’s really all you need to know about this show as it’s the only match that means anything at all. Let’s get to it.

Rockin Robin, the reigning Women’s Champion, sings America the Beautiful.

Hercules vs. King Haku

The crown isn’t on the line here. Haku jumps him from behind to start but Herc comes back with a hip toss and a slam followed by a release flapjack. A clothesline puts Haku on the floor but Hercules suplexes him right back in. Some elbow drops keep Haku down but Hercules goes after Heenan like an idiot. Haku jumps him from behind and we head back inside for a pair of backbreakers for a pair of counts.

Since this is a power match we hit the bearhug as even Jesse says this isn’t going to get a submission. Gorilla criticizes Haku’s technique, prompting Jesse to ask what a gorilla would know about bearhugging. Herc breaks the hold and the King yells at the referee, only to get caught by a cross body. Hercules pounds away and hits a running knee lift followed by some clotheslines. A powerslam gets two but Hercules jumps off the top into most of a superkick. Haku misses a top rope headbutt and Hercules wins with the belly to back suplex with a last second shoulder raise.

Rating: C-. Nothing special here but it was a basic enough match to get things going. Hercules was a generic power guy so there wasn’t much to get interested in with him. Haku would join up with Andre to win the tag titles by the end of the year. I’m not sure if there was much of a feud here other than Hercules vs. Heenan which was only touched on.

The Rockers say they can handle the Twin Towers.

Rockers vs. Twin Towers

That would be Big Boss Man/Akeem. Shawn makes his Wrestlemania debut by starting against Big Boss Man and the little guy takes over quickly. He also decks Akeem in the corner and gets to face the bigger man (Akeem, the former One Man Gang). The Rockers start flying in and out of the ring as they work over Akeem’s arm. The arm cranking continues but Akeem makes a blind tag. Marty gets tossed into Boss Man’s arms and crushed by both big men. This is back when Boss Man weighed about 400lbs so it’s a big more painful than it sounds.

The Towers take their turns with fat man offense as Marty is in big trouble in a hurry. Akeem avalanches him in the corner and it’s back to Boss Man. We get heel miscommunication though and Boss Man is knocked to the floor by his own partner. Off to Shawn who pounds away in the corner before both Rockers hit a series of whips into the corner. A double middle rope shoulder finally takes Akeem down for two and it’s back to Shawn on his own.

Akeem KILLS HIM with a clothesline (Jesse: “I think he irritated Akeem!”) but Boss Man misses a top rope splash. The Rockers hit some double dropkicks (one of which sees Shawn completely missing Bossman) but a top rope rana is countered into a wicked powerbomb by Boss Man. Akeem crushes Shawn with a splash for the pin.

Rating: C. Considering how hungover the Rockers were in this match (as confirmed by Shawn), this came off pretty well. The Rockers sold the power offense like few others could, which made for some awesome visuals. They would get a lot better over the coming years but this wasn’t their best performance.

Ted DiBiase talks about hanging out with Donald Trump and having them here to see him beat up Beefcake.

Ted DiBiase vs. Brutus Beefcake

This isn’t for the Million Dollar Title which ticks Gorilla off. Brutus has his AWESOME music at this point. Beefcake jumps DiBiase to start to tick off Jesse as well. Ted bails to the floor and comes back in for some chops, only to be knocked right back to the floor by a right hand. Back in again and Brutus wins a slugout but Vigril trips him up to give DiBiase his first control.

DiBiase pounds away (there’s a lot of punching in this match) and hits the falling punch for two. I love that move. A middle rope ax handle puts Brutus down again but Beefcake reverses a suplex to put DiBiase down right next to him. A double clothesline does the exact same thing but Ted is up first. He tries another suplex which actually works this time, followed by the Million Dollar Dream.

Brutus gets to the rope so they slug it out some more with the barber taking over. Now Beefcake throws on his own sleeper but gets sent out to the floor in a counter. Virgil interferes a bit to distract Beefcake but DiBiase stupidly goes out to the floor as well. They brawl to a double countout to a big boo from the crowd.

Rating: C-. This was mainly a punching match as well as a pretty big fall for DiBiase. To go from the main event to the third match on the card in a year is a pretty big fall, which is saying a lot as DiBiase was still a very evil heel. Brutus was getting very popular very fast and would be paired with Hogan soon after this for a BIG rub.

Brutus beats up Virgil post match and chases them off with the hedge clippers. You know, assault with a deadly weapon as Jesse calls it.

We go to the Wrestlemania brunch with the Bushwhackers eating a lot and trying to talk about their match with the Rougeaus.

Bushwhackers vs. Fabulous Rougeau Brothers

ALL AMERICAN BOYS BABY! That would be the Rougeau’s theme song and one of the most awesome entrances in company history. Seriously, go Youtube that thing. Jimmy Hart loses his jacket somehow but the Rougeaus save it in a humane act. Not that it matters as the Bushwhackers clear the ring a second later. Luke and Ray start things off and Ray quickly takes him down. I turn my head for a minute and come back to hearing Jesse say “So as far as you’re concerned, tear down the Statue of Liberty?” Like I said, commentary was a bit different back then.

Luke and Butch clear the ring of Rougeaus again before it’s down to Luke and Jacques. Butch tries to interfere for no apparent reason and Luke gets caught in a Boston Crab. In a sequence that has haunted me for years, Ray loads up Luke for a slam and while Luke is upside down, he rubs Ray’s crotch. There’s nothing more to it than that and to this day I don’t know why he did that.

Anyway Ray puts on an abdominal stretch as a fan or two chants USA. In theory that would be for the Rougeaus here who are the All American Boys facing the guys from New Zealand. The Rougeaus prematurely hug and get caught by the Battering Ram and a double gutbuster is good for the pin on Ray out of nowhere.

Rating: D. It’s a comedy match and not a very fun one. This is called a big upset but I don’t really see how you can call it that. It’s not like either team is great or even good here and the Bushwhackers were still brand new here, so presumably they had won most of their matches up to this point. I don’t get it but whatever.

Sean Mooney is licked by the Bushwhackers and says words can’t describe it. As someone who has been licked by one as well, that’s very true.

Mr. Perfect vs. Blue Blazer

That would be Owen Hart in a kind of superhero gimmick that eventually led to his death. Perfect is pretty new here too and I believe is debuting his singlet look. Hennig hits a quick hiptoss that doesn’t do much at all. Blazer blocks a slap and takes Perfect down to stagger Hennig a bit.

They slightly botch a flip out of a hiptoss and Blazer dropkicks Perfect to the floor. Blazer hits a quick hiptoss (why is that so popular here?) of his own and a dropkick for no cover. A modified northern lights suplex gets two for Blue but a top rope splash hits knees. Off to a reverse chinlock for a few moments by Perfect but Blazer fights up and hits a standing powerslam and a belly to belly for two each. A crucifix gets two more but Blazer spends too long arguing with the referee and the PerfectPlex ends this clean.

Rating: C+. This match is popular for some reason but it’s only pretty good. Owen would get to show off a lot better later on and the Blazer gimmick didn’t stick around that long. The ending here was clean too which is what Perfect would get quite often around this time. He wouldn’t really do anything of note for about a year though until having a house show feud with Hogan.

Jesse is presented to the crowd again like last year.

Mr. Fuji allegedly runs a 5K run in a tuxedo.

To really make this show feel bloated, here’s Run DMC with the Wrestlemania Rap.

We recap the double tag team turn at Survivor Series 1988 with Fuji leaving Demolition to hook up with the Powers of Pain.

Demolition says they’re ready for Fuj the Stooge.

Tag Titles: Demolition vs. Powers of Pain/Mr. Fuji

Demolition is defending and this is a handicap match. Warlord and Ax get things going with Ax pounding him down quickly. Smash comes in for a double beatdown and it’s off to a neck crank. Back to Ax for the same move and he yells at Fuji a bit. The Demolition beatdown ensues but Warlord powers Ax over to the corner for a tag to Barbarian. He shoves Smash into the corner and is immediately clotheslined down by a fresh Ax. The crowd is dead here.

Barbie gets double teamed by the champions and Ax hooks a neck crank. Back to Smash who gets chopped down before it’s back to Warlord. The advantage lasts for all of three seconds before the Powers finally get some successful cheating going on. Off to Fuji for the first time for some old man offense that is far better than Heenan or Hart at least. Barbarian comes in again and the yet to be named Kick of Fear puts Ax down again for no cover.

The match continues to stay in second gear at best with both teams barely moving at all. Fuji tries the flashiest move of the match by going up top, only to miss Ax. Gorilla: “He hasn’t wrestled in years, just like us.” Jesse: “Us? For Fuji and I it’s been years. For you many years.” Barbarian gets clotheslined down again and it’s off to Smash as everything breaks down. Fuji loads up his salt but hits Warlord by mistake. The Demolition Decapitator is enough to end Fuji and retain the titles.

Rating: D. I’m a fan of Demolition but this was a REALLY weak performance by both teams. The Powers would split soon after this which was the best idea for both guys as they were never going to break through the ceiling with Demolition on top. The title reign would continue to go on for another two months or so, reaching at nearly a year and a half.

Randy Savage has nothing to say other than he’s ready for Hogan.

Ronnie Garvin vs. Dino Bravo

For absolutely no apparent reason, Jimmy Snuka is brought out after the wrestlers’ intros. Bravo jumps him from behind to open the match before it’s off to a bearhug. That goes about three seconds do Dino loads up a powerbomb instead. Garvin escapes and starts a flurry of offense and gets two off a jackknife cover. A sleeper is easily broken up by Bravo and he breaks up a piledriver as well. Garvin tries to pound away in the corner but gets caught in an atomic drop and the side suplex for the pin by Bravo.

Rating: D. This didn’t do anything to get the crowd going which is a big problem with this show: the crowd doesn’t care about most of this stuff and why in the world would they? This is a random match between two guys that have no reason to fight and have no future as a main talent. Nothing to see here at all.

Frenchy Martin, Dino’s manager, gets beaten down by Garvin post match just because.

Brain Busters vs. Strike Force

This is the return of Strike Force after Martel had a bad injury. Blanchard and Martel start things off and Rick almost immediately has to punch out of the wrong corner. Off to Anderson who gets rammed face first into the mat before being put in his own test of strength on the mat. Arn catches Martel in a body scissors but Rick turns it over into his signature Boston Crab.

Blanchard makes the save but Tito immediately comes in to put him in the Figure Four. Martel puts one on Anderson as well as things break down. We get some near falls by Tito but he accidentally hits the forearm on Martel to take him out. Rick gets ticked off as Tito is basically in a handicap match. The Busters get to take over on Tito but you know Santana can hang with either guy.

Arn goes up but gets slammed down, allowing Tito to set up a hot tag to….no one. Martel drops down to the floor and walks out on his partner, officially making it a handicap match. The yet to be named spinebuster from Anderson plants Tito and it’s back to Blanchard. Tully blocks a monkey flip and the spike piledriver kills Tito dead for the pin.

Rating: B-. Best match of the night so far as all four guys were moving out there. Tito could go with the best of them and he had some of the best of them to do that with in this one. Martel and Santana would feud on and off for about a year until they just stopped fighting out of nowhere.

Martel says he’s tired of carrying Tito and that’s that.

It’s time for the return of Roddy Piper in Piper’s Pit, but after a long introduction by Fink, we get Brother Love in a kilt instead. You younguns might know him as Bruce Prichard from Gut Check. Love interviews “himself” and does one heck of a Roddy Piper impression in the process. Morton Downey Jr., a kind of forefather to Jerry Springer, is the actual guest. He runs to the ring and immediately lights up a cigarette and gay jokes abound about Love.

Now the real Piper comes out to make fun of Love for being feminine. Roddy won’t let Love answer any questions by saying he doesn’t really want to know that badly. Morton is on his fifth cigarette or so at this point. This goes on FOREVER until Love says he’s a bit Scotch. You know, as in from Scotland. Piper rips off Love’s kilt and the Brother sprints off. Finally we get to Downey who implies he slept with Piper’s mom.

Morton keeps blowing smoke in Piper’s face as Piper makes fun of Downey for having warts on his face. Piper gets annoyed with the smoke and Downey calls him a transvestite. Roddy asks for a smoke of his own and sprays Downey with a fire extinguisher. This took FIFTEEN MINUTES, as in longer than all but the main event tonight.

We get an ad for No Holds Barred, Hogan’s acting debut.

Donald Trump likes hosting Wrestlemania.

Ventura goes into a hilarious rant against Hogan for invading Hollywood because Hogan needs a job after Savage beats him tonight. Jesse shouts that Hulk can drive his limo and storms off.

We recap the Megapowers feud as intermission continues. Basically Savage won the title at Mania 4 then teamed up with Hogan. Hogan kept getting the pins and finally at Main Event II, Savage accidentally wiped out Elizabeth. Hogan took Liz to the back to get attention but it left Savage alone. Finally Savage slapped Hogan and turned heel again, leading to the heel promo of a lifetime as he ERUPTED on Hogan, letting out every bit of his pent up rage and jealousy before blasting Hogan with the title in the medical room.

Hogan says it was Savage eaten alive by the jealousy and the title is coming home tonight. This somehow turns into a talk about destroying the Trump Plaza, which I think he touched on last year too.

Andre the Giant vs. Jake Roberts

Big John Studd is referee and comes out to what would become Jim Duggan’s music. This was supposed to set up Andre vs. Studd but Studd left before it went anywhere. Sometime before the match, Andre and Heenan get the turnbuckle pad off and Jake goes face first into the steel. Ventura and Gorilla talk about David vs. Goliath (Jesse: “He used a foreign object.”) as Jake reaches for the snake bag. That goes nowhere so Studd crushes him in the corner.

Andre looks so different than he did two years ago. In Detroit he looked like a killing machine but here he looks like a lumbering oaf. Giant steps on Jake a few times but Roberts comes back with some strikes. He knocks Andre into the ropes and chokes away, only to see Andre get his arm loose and choke Jake right back.

In a moment that I’ve never seen explained, Andre fires some shoulders into Jake in the corner, only to stagger backwards. I’m guessing Jake was supposed to knee him (the announcers suggested he did) but Jake’s legs never moved. Either way, Roberts pounds away a bit before being knocked to the floor. Studd and Andre get in a shoving match as Ted DiBiase runs out to steal the snake. Andre chokes Studd until Jake chases DiBiase down and gets the snake back. He slides Damien in and the giant runs from the smaller referee giant, giving Jake the DQ win.

Rating: D. ANOTHER match that didn’t go anywhere here as it was hard to buy Jake as being a threat to Andre while at the same time it was hard to be intimidated by the Giant due to how old and banged up he was. Nothing match here which was supposed to set up Andre vs. Studd, but instead Studd retired so Andre got a tag title reign instead.

Sensational Sherri wants to fight Rockin Robin and hopes Liz gets hurt today.

Greg Valentine/Honky Tonk Man vs. Hart Foundation

Valentine and Honky aren’t Rhythm and Blues yet. Bret and Honky start and it’s atomic drops all around. Honky sells his hilariously but Greg plays it a bit more serious. Off to Anvil for some power but Bret misses the middle rope elbow. The beating begins and you know Hart is going to sell things very well. Valentine gets to pound away as Gorilla says Greg isn’t warmed up yet.

Honky hits the Shake Rattle and Roll but tags in Valentine for the Figure Four instead. Greg gets rolled up for two instead as Gorilla goes NUTS complaining about Honky not covering. The hot tag brings in Anvil again to clean house on both heels. A great clothesline gets two on the Hammer before it’s back to Bret for the middle rope elbow. Everything breaks down and Bret gets Jimmy Hart’s megaphon to drill Honky for the pin.

Rating: D+. Enough filler matches already! This is probably the fourth match out of ten so far that have been there with no particular reason for it to happen. The show is already well over two and a half hours now and there are still four matches to go. That’s one of the problems with the late 80s: they made the shows long for the sake of having them be long.

We recap Rude vs. Warrior which is basically just because Rude attacked Warrior at the Rumble Super Posedown and the champion wants revenge.

Intercontinental Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Rick Rude

Warrior is defending but Rude has the belt imprinted on his tights. Rude tries a knee to the ribs but hits the belt by mistake. Warrior immediately takes over with the power game and LAUNCHES Rude into the corner. The champ throws on a bearhug for a bit until Rude finally pokes him in the eyes to escape. Rude busts out a MISSILE DROPKICK for two but gets launched off Warrion on the kickout.

Back to the hearhug but Rude gets out the same way as he did the first time. Warrior responds by biting Rude in the face but the splash hits knees. A piledriver puts Warrior down but Rick can’t immediately cover. It only gets two but the kickout is much weaker than earlier. Rude tries to swivel his hips but his back is too messed up. He cranks back on Warrior’s arms but the champion gets to the ropes and starts shaking away.

Here come the shoulders from Warrior and he plants Rude face first into the mat a few times. Warrior tries a slam or something but drops Rude and almost puts him on the floor. Rude gets a boot up in the corner to stop a charging Warrior but the Rude Awakening is broken through pure power. Rick is clotheslined to the floor and Warrior suplexes him back in, only to have Heenan trip Warrior up and hold down his foot for the shocking upset and the title to Rude. This might have been Warrior’s first televised loss but I don’t think it was.

Rating: B. This is one of those pairings that just worked no matter what you had them do. You often hear about people having chemistry and that’s what you had here: these two could just work well together for no apparent reason and this is a fine example. Warrior would get the title back later in the year before moving to the world title scene a few months later. Good match here.

Warrior beats up Heenan post match. Remember that for later.

Bad News Brown vs. Jim Duggan

This show MUST continue! Again no reason to this match and they’re just fighting to fill in another five minutes on this already WAY too long card. They punch each other a lot and Duggan knocks him to the floor. Brown comes back in with his judo stuff but misses the Ghetto Blaster (running enziguri). Bad News gets annoyed and goes to the floor for a chair but Duggan hits it with the board for the double DQ.

Rating: D-. This is the twelfth match on this show and we’re over three hours and three minutes into it already. There is no reason at all for this to be continuing but it is anyway just because. Duggan would go on to feud with whoever he could find as would Brown, showing why this match didn’t need to happen at all.

Red Rooster says he’ll beat Heenan and it’ll be a great day in the barnyard.

Red Rooster vs. Bobby Heenan

There’s actually a backstory: Heenan managed Rooster but said he was limited so Rooster dumped Heenan. Bobby is hurt so he brings the Brooklyn Brawler with him. Those sentences take as long to type as the match lasts as Rooster hits him once, Heenan misses a charge into the post, gets whipped into the buckle and the match is over in 30 seconds. To recap, Rooster beat him with an Irish whip.

Just to drag this out EVEN LONGER, the Brawler beats the Rooster up, because WE HAVE TO PUSH BROOKLN FREAKING BRAWLER.

Liz says she’ll be in a neutral corner tonight and won’t cheer for either guy in the main event.

Tony Schiavone and Sean Mooney fill in even MORE time.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

This is huge and Savage is on fire here. As I said Liz is in a neutral corner despite never being Hogan’s manager as a singles guy ever. Savage comes out first for no apparent reason. Savage immediately heads to the floor to stall as you would expect him to do. The fans HATE him at this point after loving him like crazy a year earlier. Hogan finally shoves Savage down and it’s time to stall some more.

Back up and Hogan shoulders him down again for the third trip to the floor for Savage. As Jesse and Gorilla get in an argument over the value of managers, Savage grabs a headlock. Hulk shoves him off and Randy heads outside, only to hide behind Liz in a truly evil move. Back in again and Hogan actually uses a nice amateur move and hooks a front facelock. That wasn’t bad at all. Savage powers out of it (surprising as well) and pokes Hogan in the eye to take over.

A top rope ax handle gets one on Hogan and it’s off to an armbar. In something you don’t often see, Hogan is pulled down to the mat by his hair. It feels weird even typing that. Hulk uses a handful of trunks to launch Randy out to the floor and Jesse freaks out. Back in and a clothesline puts Randy down, followed by a series of elbow drops. Hulk is bleeding above the eye.

Randy gets in a shot to the face and puts on a fast sleeper which is transitioned into a chinlock. Hulk comes back with an atomic drop but an elbow drop misses. A shot into the buckle sets up a rollup with trunks for two on Hulk. Savage stomps on his fingers which ticks Hogan off. Hogan slams Savage to the floor where the champion doesn’t want Liz’s help. Hulk follows him out and rams Randy’s face into the barricade.

Savage escapes being posted and sends Hogan in by mistake. After sending Hulk back in, Randy yells at Liz a bit more and shoves her up the aisle. The referee ejects Liz, making the only interesting factor a nonfactor. Back to the floor and Savage drops the ax handle off the top to send Hogan throat first into the barricade. Savage goes after the throat with various evil measures but the elbow only gets two. Hulk Up, big boot, leg drop, new champion.

Rating: B-. It’s Hogan vs. Savage so these two are always going to have at least a watchable match, but at the end of the day this was pretty much designed to be a Hogan win and that’s what it wound up being. The smart move would be to have Savage keep the title by DQ or something, causing Hulk to chase the title until Summerslam for the title change. But instead we go with the easy (and not horrible) ending. It’s a good match here but not great.

Hogan celebrates forever to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was pretty terrible. The main words you probably heard me say in here were things like “it keeps going” or “filler”. That’s the problem with this show: there’s WAY too much stuff going on with 14 matches, that stupid rap, and the fifteen minute Piper segment. This show runs nearly three hours and forty minutes which is WAY too much for a single show given what they had going on at this point. Probably five matches at minimum could be called filler here. That’s WAY too much and I can see why this is considered such a lame show.

Ratings Comparison

Hercules vs. King Haku

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Twin Towers vs. Rockers

Original: C

Redo: C

Brutus Beefcake vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Bushwhackers vs. Fabulous Rougeau Brothers

Original: D-

Redo: D

Mr. Perfect vs. Blue Blazer

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Demolition vs. Powers of Pain/Mr. Fuji

Original: C-

Redo: D

Dino Bravo vs. Ronnie Garvin

Original: F

Redo: D

Brain Busters vs. Strike Force

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Jake Roberts vs. Andre the Giant

Original: D

Redo: D

Hart Foundation vs. Honky Tonk Man/Greg Valentine

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Rick Rude vs. Ultimate Warrior

Original: B

Redo: B

Jim Duggan vs. Bad News Brown

Original: F

Redo: D-

Red Rooster vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: D

Wow that was a rather boring redo.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/12/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-5-hogan-vs-savage-and-thats-about-it/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Wrestlemania IV
Date: March 27, 1988
Location: Trump Plaza Hotel and Casino, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 18,165
Commentators: Jesse Ventura, Gorilla Monsoon

Well the crowd is only about 1/5 the size of the one we had last year but there are even more matches this year. This is a one idea show: we’ve got a tournament. The WWF Title is vacant due to the ending of Hogan vs. Andre II at The Main Event (for you ratings people, this show earned a 15 rating on NBC live on a Friday night. Wrestling used to be HUGE.) when there was a twin referee brought in to cost Hogan the title. The title is now vacant and will be decided tonight. Let’s get to it.

Before I forget, it should be noted that as this aired, the NWA (WCW) was airing the first live Clash of the Champions for free on TBS. That show would have one of the best matches the company ever produced with Sting challenging Flair for the world title for the first time.

Here are the tournament brackets.

Hogan

BYE

Andre

BYE

Jim Duggan

Ted DiBiase

Don Muraco

Dino Bravo

Ricky Steamboat

Greg Valentine

Randy Savage

Butch Reed

Bam Bam Bigelow

One Man Gang

Rick Rude

Jake Roberts

Gene welcomes us to the show and presents Gladys Knight to sing America the Beautiful.

Battle Royal

Bret Hart, Jim Neidhart, Jim Powers, Paul Roma, Sika, Danny Davis, B. Brian Blair, Jim Brunzell, Bad News Brown, Sam Houston, Jacques Rougeau, Ray Rougeau, Ken Patera, Ron Bass, Junkyard Dog, Nikolai Volkoff, Boris Zhukov, Hillbilly Jim, Harley Race, George Steele

Just for a big trophy here. Steele chills on the floor and Bob Uecker is in on commentary here. Sam Houston is put out quick as is Sika. Brunzell is sent to the apron by Nikolai but he makes the save. Both Bee’s are sent to the apron but Steele pulls Neidhart out to the floor. Both of the Bees are put out as is Ray Rougeau as the ring is thinning out a bit. Dog puts Bass out but has to fight off the Bolsheviks.

Hillbilly Jim is put out and Roma puts Davis out as well. We’re down to nine and Powers is out too. We’ve got Volkoff, Zhukov, Hart, Roma, Jacques Rougeau, Race, Brown, Patera and Dog. Race and Dog headbutt each other with the canine man winning. Nikolai is dumped by Patera and Zukov gets the same treatment.

Patera is pulled to the floor by Volkoff as Race and Rougeau go out. So it’s JYD, Hart and Brown to go. Dog gets on all fours to headbutt both heels but they finally catch up on him with some double teaming. He gets dumped out and Hart and Brown seem to be willing to split the win. Brown of course turns on Hart and dumps him out to win the trophy.

Rating: D+. This was nothing of note other than the potential beginning of Bret’s first aborted singles push. The problem with battle royals is the same most of the time: there’s no reason for most of them to happen and with no story, there’s not much interest in the match. Sometimes you’ll get a good one, but this wasn’t it.

Brown stands next to the trophy (which stands about 6’0) but Bret jumps him and destroys the trophy.

Fink explains the tournament structure (mainly time limits and saying it’s winners only advancing) and introduces Robin Leech (hosted a show called Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous) to read a proclomation.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Ted DiBiase vs. Jim Duggan

DiBiase is one of the favorites here as he tried to buy the title which started the whole mess. Andre and Virgil are with him here. Ted immediately hides in the corner as the Battle of Mid-South begins. Duggan wins a slugout and an atomic drop puts DiBiase on the floor. I could watch DiBiase fall over the top all day. He was always great at falling over and made it look like a science.

Back in and Jim clotheslines him down before pounding away a bit more. DiBiase charges into a boot in the corner and hits a middle rope ax handle for two. Duggan comes back with a sunset flip of all things for two and to give Jesse a shock. A suplex puts DiBiase down and he jumps into a punch in the ribs to slow him down even more. Duggan slams him down but Andre trips him before the three point clothesline can be launched. Jim looks at Andre but gets caught in the back by a knee, sending DiBiase to the quarterfinals.

Rating: C-. DiBiase’s flipping was a good touch and they got to do some decent stuff in less than five minutes. That’s one of the problems with tonight’s show: since there are so many matches they have to keep things short. Duggan would eventually feud with Andre in some surprisingly decent matches.

Gene is with Brutus and while looking him up and down says “Brutus this is incredible what a package.” After that unintentional comedy, Gene asks Brutus if he’s worried about Jimmy Hart interfering in the IC Title match tonight. Brutus says Hart will get a haircut if he intereferes.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Dino Bravo vs. Don Muraco

Bravo shoves him back into the corner to start to win the first power battle of the match. Muraco hammers him down and tries something like a Vader Bomb but basically just lands next to Bravo instead. Dino comes back with an elbow to the face and a gutwrench suplex for no cover. A knee in the corner misses Muraco so he starts hammering on the knee.

A spinning toehold has Bravo in trouble but Don gets kicked away and gets his head caught in the ropes. Dino uses Muraco’s own piledriver to get two but a second attempt is countered with a backdrop. They clothesline each other but it’s Muraco up first. He hits a flying forearm which works so well that he tries it again, but Bravo pulls the referee into Muraco for the DQ.

Rating: D+. this was slow and plodding but it wasn’t horrible. Muraco was far better when he was less muscular and evil and this part of his career never quite worked that well. One very nice thing here is Jesse freaking out when Bravo got disqualified but then saying it was correct when seeing Bravo pull the referee on the replay. It’s very refreshing to see something like that.

Bob Uecker warns Honky Tonk Man about getting beaten up by Brutus. Honky makes fun of Uecker’s batting average and threatens to backstroke up the Mississippi River. Uecker: “You guys ain’t never coming to my house!”

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Greg Valentine vs. Ricky Steamboat

Should be good. Steamboat brings the future Richie Steamboat to the ring with him in matching outfits. Feeling out process to start with Steamboat taking him down via an armdrag. Gorilla says Ricky has excellence of execution to coin a phrase. A few shoulders get two on Valentine so he throws Steamboat over the top. That of course doesn’t work on the Dragon so he comes back with a dropkick and a crucifix for two.

Valentine comes back with his usual elbows and forearms to put Steamboat down. He pulls Steamboat off the ropes so Ricky drops onto the back of his head. This allows Gorilla to bust out the term “external occipital protuberance”, to which Jesse replies “THE WHAT?” The voice Ventura says that in is hilarious. Apparently it’s that little bump on the back of your head. Steamboat reverses a suplex into one of his own and hooks an armbar. Jimmy Hart goes a rant of instructions to the Hammer which is such a lost art in wrestling.

Steamboat gets dropped on the back of his head, allowing for another discussion of whatever that thing is called. Gorilla: “External occipital protuberance.” Jesse: “Oh ok. Back of the head for all you normal people back there.” Valentine pounds away with elbows as Gorilla says they’re “right in the kisser, right between the eyes.” His biology knowledge is all over the place. Donald Trump is in the front row. Steamboat comes back with some chops for two but Greg puts him right back down with a gutbuster.

Valentine goes after the leg but the Figure Four is broken up. They chop it out with Steamboat taking over, only to charge into a boot in the corner. Valentine hits a top rope forearm but still can’t put the Figure Four on. Steamboat hits an elbow to the face and a top rope chop for two. He rams Valentine into the corner ten times and shoves the referee away when he tries to break it up. Ricky goes up and hits the cross body but Valentine rolls through to eliminate Steamboat.

Rating: C+. Like I said, decent stuff here although Steamboat would be gone pretty much immediately over wanting to take some time off. Vince said no so Ricky left wrestling for about nine months. Anyway, good stuff here from two guys that know how to work whatever kind of a match you ask them to. Valentine was great in a role like this where he wasn’t going to win anything but he could fill in a spot and do just fine.

Steamboat waves goodbye to the crowd so yeah this was it for him.

The British Bulldogs with their recently returned dog Matilda declare her a weasel dog for their six man against the Islanders and Heenan. Oh and Koko is here too.

Bobby Heenan gets a package and actually tips the delivery guy. Ok then.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Randy Savage vs. Butch Reed

Macho and Liz come out in matching blue and Liz really is beautiful. She’s also one of the few females in wrestling that stayed classy (until Russo got ahold of her) for almost her entire run. This is power vs. speed with Reed getting Savage in the corner early on. Jesse asks Gorilla if he would buy a car from Slick (Reed’s manager). Gorilla says no. Jesse: “Not even a bright blue Caddy?” These two are just freaking fun together. They knew how to work off each other so well and it made the late 80s a ton of fun.

Reed pounds away on Savage and guillotines him on the top rope and out to the floor. Back in and Butch stomps on Randy a bit before elbowing him right back down. Savage gets in a kick to the face and fires off some punches, only to get clotheslined down again. Reed goes up top but takes WAY too long to jaw at Liz, allowing Savage to slam him down and drop the elbow for the pin. The pop when Savage hits the elbow is HUGE. You could hear it starting lasts year in Detroit and now it’s full fledged here.

Rating: C-. This was basically a squash until the very end. Savage was great at building up sympathy from the crowd which is why the pops were so huge when he won here. Reed would also head to the NWA soon after this to do nothing for a year before joining Doom. Not much to see here but again, the time crunch hurts things a lot.

Uecker talks about trying to get with Vanna White tonight when Heenan and the Islanders come in. Heenan: “You talk about writing letters. You had 700,000 votes for the Hall of Fame. You would have had more but you ran out of stamps. Heenan isn’t worried about the six man later.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. One Man Gang

Gang pounds away in the corner to start and Bigelow is in trouble. This is one of those big guys that pound away on each other with basic stuff but it looks better because they’re huge matches. Bigelow comes back with a forearm and a low splash for two. Bam Bam pounds away and hits a headbutt and then about four more to take over. He hits the ropes and Slick pulls the rope down though and Gang pounds on him on the apron enough to cause a countout. Too short to rate but this was lame. I think Bigelow had a bad knee here too.

Hogan goes into one of his most bizarre and over the top promos here. He talks about slamming Andre and breaking the United States in half, sending Andre and his next two opponents into the ocean. The rest if going to be nearly verbatim because a description won’t do it justice. Talking about them falling into the ocean:

“And so will Donald Trump and all the Hulkamaniacs, but as Donald Trump hangs on to the top of the Trump Plaza with his family under his other arm, and as they sink to the bottom of the sea, THANK GOD Donald Trump is a Hulkamaniac. He’ll know enough to let go of his materialistic possessions, hang onto the wife and kids and dog paddle all the way to safety. But Donald, if somehow you run out of gas, and all the Hulkamaniacs happen to run out of gas, just hang onto the largest back in the world and I’ll dog paddle and backstroke (wouldn’t the people on his back drown?) all of us to safety.”

So Hogan has just declared himself Jesus. You knew it was coming eventually.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts

This is part of a BIG feud over Rude trying to get with Jake’s wife. Jake immediately goes for the part of Rude’s body that would mess with Rude the most: his face. Rude comes back with a slam and some right hands so Jake comes back with some slams of his own. Rude winds up in the corner with the snake and bails right into an arm wringer by Jake. Try as he might, Rude can’t fight out of the wristlock as it’s pretty clear this is going to last for awhile.

The hold is finally broken by Rude putting him on the top rope but Jake comes off the middle rope with a jumping knee lift to send Rick to the outside. Rude gets slammed again but this time the knee lift misses and Rick stomps away. Rick drops a knee and gets a VERY slow two count. We hit the chinlock and I open a book because we’re going to be here for a long time.

After about two minutes, Rude hits a token clothesline before hooking the chinlock all over again. Jake tries to fight back but gets launched into the head and dropped on his face. A top rope fist to a downed Jake gets two and it’s back to the chinlock. You can hear the fans booing now. Roberts tries a belly to back suplex but Rude still doesn’t break the hold.

Now the boring chants begin so Jake FINALLY hits a jawbreaker to get out of the hold and get the crowd going a bit. The short clothesline looks to set up the DDT but Rude rams him into the corner. Jake is suplexed out of a headlock for two and both guys are down. Rude tries a pin with his feet on the ropes and the time runs out. The fans are NOT happy with that one.

Rating: D-. What in this is supposed to be appealing? We don’t get a DDT, we don’t get any comeuppance for Rude, we don’t get a winner, and we don’t even get a beating for Heenan. This was long and very dull with at least five minutes out of fifteen being spent in a chinlock. If you need to have two guys get eliminated to prevent another match later, wouldn’t it make sense to have this one go fast instead of going the time limit?

Gene and Vanna White look at the brackets so we’ll do that too.

Hogan

Andre

DiBiase

Muraco

Savage

Valentine

One Man Gang

BYE

Vanna has no idea who Bob Uecker is but she wants Hogan to win.

Hercules vs. Ultimate Warrior

They collide to start as the announcers recap the tournament. Hercules hits three straight clotheslines to put Warrior down to Jesse’s amazement. Warrior fires off some chops but gets backdropped out to the floor. They brawl on the floor for a bit as Heenan is reaching in his pockets. Both guys head back inside and pound on each other a little bit more with Warrior hitting the ten punches in the corner. Hercules comes out of the corner with an atomic drop and sends Warrior into the corner chest first. He puts on the full nelson but Warior climbs the corner and falls back ala Bret and Austin at Survivor Series 96 for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. Warrior was rapidly becoming a force but it wouldn’t be another six months before he finally hit something special. Hercules would be around for a few more years but would never do anything of note. This was just a filler match to bridge the gap between the first and second rounds of the tournament.

We recap Hogan vs. Andre, which I’m sure you know the story of, at least up to Mania III. After that, Andre disappeared for the summer until leading his team to victory over Hogan’s team at the first Survivor Series (Hogan was counted out). So anyway DiBiase debuted and wanted to buy the world title but Hogan of course said no. DiBiase instead bought Andre from Heenan and said go get me the belt.

This led us to Indianapolis and the first Main Event, which completely destroyed every ratings record ever for wrestling, drawing a mind blowing 15 rating and 33 million viewers live on NBC on a Friday night. Today, 5 million people watching Raw is reasons for a celebration for Raw. Anyway, there was a screwjob finish with Dave Hebner’s twin brother Earl debuting as an imposter and counting a pin while Hogan’s shoulder was clearly up. Andre gave the title to DiBiase which didn’t fly with President Jack Tunney, so the title was held up and we got the tournament to settle things.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Andre the Giant vs. Hulk Hogan

Hulk charges into the ring but gets stomped down. DiBiase and Virgil are here in Andre’s corner. Hogan gets rammed into the corner and punched down by the giant but Hogan comes back with some forearms. He has to stop to beat up DiBiase and ram Ted and Andre’s heads together. Hogan chops Andre into the ropes and gets him tied up. DiBiase frees the arms but Hogan punches Andre down and drops some elbows, but the giant grabs him by the throat from the mat and takes over again.

Some standing choking ensues and Hogan goes down to his knees. That gets shifted into a nerve hold but Hogan fights up and fires away on Andre even more but can’t drop him. Hogan goes for a slam but DiBiase hits him in the back as Virgil distracts the referee. Hulk gets the chair away and hits Andre with the chair. Andre gets the chair away and hits Hulk with it, somehow drawing a double DQ despite Hogan clearly hitting Andre first.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t much from a quality standpoint but they were at a far faster pace than they were last year. That’s probably the right idea given how messed up Andre’s body was at this point though. Anyway, this is all part of the Master Plan which we’ll hear more about later on. Not a terrible match but it’s really just there to say it happened.

Hogan chases Virgil and DiBiase down with the former getting suplexed in the aisle. Hulk goes back in and slams Andre before posing for a few minutes despite not winning the match. It’s still going. He didn’t pose this much at last year’s show.

Savage and Liz (now in pink) say that Hogan was cheated and that he’s never been defeated. Oh and Macho is going to win.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Don Muraco vs. Ted DiBiase

The winner goes to the finals because of the double DQ. Ted comes out alone here for the first time tonight. Muraco pulls him into the ring by the hair and we’re ready to go. A quick powerslam gets two and Ted is reeling. There’s a clothesline for another two and Ted tries to bail. DiBiase finally gets to the floor and Billy Graham (Muraco’s manager) tries to hit him with his cane. Back in and Don tries to pull him out of the corner but gets pulled into the corner himself instead. DiBiase finally has some control but misses a falling reverse elbow off the middle rope. Muraco makes a quick comeback but walks into a hotshot for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but yet again the time hurts them a lot. There’s only so much you can do in about five minutes, although it was good to show that DiBiase could get a win on his own which he did here. Muraco would be gone pretty soon if I remember correctly. Not much of a match here but it wasn’t bad.

Demolition talks about hitting people over the head with ball bats and say they’ll win the titles.

One Man Gang’s bye is announced.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Randy Savage vs. Greg Valentine

Savage takes over quickly with a slam and a knee drop for two but Valentine comes back with a pair of forearms, the second from the top rope. A shoulderbreaker gets two for Valentine and it’s time for some more elbows. Greg throws him to the floor and rams Randy into the barricade a few times. More elbows to the head and chest follow as Savage is in a lot of trouble.

Back in and Valentine starts in on the leg but Savage quickly grabs a rope. A suplex gets two for Valentine and Randy is in trouble. All of a sudden Savage goes NUTS (he’s fine then) and pounds away on Hammer with the top rope ax handle. He loads up another one but they kind of collide instead. Savage misses a charge at the ropes and Valentine tries the Figure Four again, only to get rolled up for the pin to advance Savage.

Rating: B-. It’s the best match of the tournament so far but that’s not saying much. Also it’s one of the longer matches of the tournament at just over six minutes so that probably has something to do with it. Savage took a beating in this but managed to sneak out with a win which is always cool to see. The fans continue to pop huge for him too which is a great sign.

Vanna White has no idea who Bob Uecker is. We look at the updated brackets:

Ted DiBiase

BYE

Randy Savage

One Man Gang

Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Brutus Beefcake

Sherri Martel is with Honky as Peggy Sue here which is a pretty amazing character change for her. This is during Honky’s insanely long run that drew a ton of money and is pretty awesome all around. Brutus hits a quick atomic drop and messes with Honky’s hair to play with his mind a bit. Honky bails to the floor as Jesse and Gorilla debate crooked referees. Back in and Beefcake rams Honky’s head into the buckle a few times as this is one sided so far.

A high knee sends the champion back to the floor but once back in, Beefcake gets caught by a shot to the stomach. Honky takes over and stomps away which is about the extent of his offense. He loads up the Shake Rattle and Roll but drops it and goes back to stomping. Honky tries it again but Brutus grabs the rope to block it. Beefcake pounds away a bit and grabs his sleeper but Jimmy knocks out the referee. Honky gets knocked but but there’s no referee so Brutus celebrates like an idiot. Brutus cuts Jimmy Hart’s hair for fun and Honky walks out. It’s a DQ I think.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as this show is just going WAY too long at this point. We’re only about two and a half hours into it and we’ve got four matches left. Brutus was just another guy in there to not get the title off Honky, which adds him to a list of about 10 guys who couldn’t do it. Honky would get his soon enough though.

In a semi-famous bit, Andre talks about DiBiase paying him to eliminate Hogan (not really a surprise) and then chokes Bob Uecker.

Islanders/Bobby Heenan vs. British Bulldogs/Koko B. Ware

There’s actually a story here. Heenan comes to the ring in a dog handlers’ outfit (remember the package from earlier?) because Matilda, the dog mascot of the Bulldogs, is back from being dognapped, presumably by the Islanders. Koko is there because when you need a filler, you call Koko B. Ware. We start with Dynamite vs. Tama but it’s quickly off to Haku vs. Davey Boy for a nice power match.

Davey slams him down a few times and it’s off to a quickly broken chinlock. Back to Tama who is gorilla pressed up and down and it’s back to Haku. Jesse: “Heenan seems to be saving himself.” Gorilla: “Yeah for the senior prom.” Did Gorilla just make a sex joke? I can feel my childhood crumbling as I type this. Koko comes in for some quick shots but it’s back to Dynamite for the clothesline that Benoit copied from him.

The Kid charges into a kick in the corner and here’s Heenan for the first time. He stomps on Dynamite, gets hit once in his padded suit, and runs away. That’s about what I expected. Tama tries a Vader Bomb but hits knees, allowing for another tag to Koko. He pounds on both Islanders but Haku takes him right back down. Tama comes in with a top rope chop and Heenan gets his second tag. Heenan chokes a bit but misses a charge into the post. Everything breaks down and the Islanders drop Heenan onto Koko for the pin.

Rating: C. I told you Koko was worthless in this. The stuff with the tag teams was pretty solid but the rest of it was as dull as you would expect. These six man tags with the Bulldogs in there don’t go that well for them but this was their last try at it. This was basically a comedy match and it was only kind of funny.

Jesse Ventura is introduced to the crowd for some posing.

Ted DiBiase’s bye is announced.

WWF World Title Tournament Semifinals: One Man Gang vs. Randy Savage

Savage and Liz are in black for this one. Randy tries to lock up with him to start which isn’t his best play here. Gang shoves him into the corner and pounds him down then does it again for a few more minutes. A pair of splashes miss and an elbow sends Gang into the ropes and out to the floor. Savage tries a slam but gets choked down instead. Liz gets on the apron for no apparent reason as Slick throws in the cane, but Gang gets caught swinging it for the DQ.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here and Savage on defense can’t save most of a match. This is the second win over a Slick client of the night and he would spend the summer feuding with more of them. Gang was a decent big man but at the end of the day he was just another monster for a hero to vanquish. Not that there’s anything wrong with that as people can make a great living like that, especially in the 80s.

Savage gets hit with the cane anyway but he still comes back and sends Gang into Slick.

The finals are DiBiase vs. Savage.

Bob Uecker can’t catch up with Vanna.

Tag Titles: Demolition vs. Strike Force

Strike Force is one of my favorite teams ever and is comprised of Rick Martel and Tito Santana. They had been champions for something like five months and are still considered transitional champions. Smash and Martel start things off and the former lives up to his namesake by beating Rick down. Everything breaks down quickly for a bit and the result is the champions in control. Tito comes in to work over the arm of Ax before it’s off to Smash for more arm cranking.

Demolition comes back with a standing Hart Attack before it’s back to Ax for a powerslam. Smash suplexes Tito down for two but an elbow drop misses. Ax comes back in and gets caught out of nowhere by the flying forearm (Jesse: “He learned that in the Mexican Football League.”). There’s the hot tag to Martel and it’s dropkicks a go-go. The Boston Crab goes on Smash but Tito goes after Ax. The forearm takes him down but Fuji slides in the cane. Rick gets blasted in the back of the head, giving Demolition their first titles. They would hold those belts for over a year and a half.

Rating: C+. Power vs. speed is always a good combination and that’s what you got here. Demolition was a pair of guys who beat the tar out of everyone they fought and that’s what they did here. It took a pair of Horsemen to get the belts off of them if that tells you anything about how awesome they were.

Robin Leech brings out the WWF Title belt.

Bob Uecker is guest ring announcer. Vanna White is guest timekeeper and she gives Bob a kiss.

WWF World Title: Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase

Savage and Liz are now in white and Andre is with DiBiase. Macho blocks some punches in the corner but Andre trips him up like a jerk. Andre does it again and Savage is catching on that he’s got a problem. They trad some cranking on the arm and DiBiase’s sunset flip doesn’t work. A clothesline gets two for Randy and he sends DiBiase to the floor where Andre says go ahead and jump.

Realizing he’s in trouble, Savage sends Liz to the back the obvious reason (hint: the fans are chanting HOGAN). DiBiase hooks a chinlock and heeeeeeeeeeeere’s Hulk. The look on Hogan’s face and his jaws going all over the place make him look high as a kite. Ted pounds away in the corner and Andre pulls Savage to the outside. Hogan jumps the giant but Savage is in big trouble.

A gutwrench suplex gets two for Ted but he goes up top for reasons of general stupidity, earning that slam off the top by Savage. Randy tries a quick elbow but only hits the mat. DiBiase puts on the Million Dollar Dream but Hogan, ever the hero, comes in and whacks DiBiase in the bak with a chair. Savage runs to the top and the big elbow gives him his first world title.

Rating: B-. This was a decent match and the place went NUTS for the win, but they were both really tired and it slowed them down a lot. The Hogan cheating wasn’t really necessary and it made Savage look a bit weak, but at the end of the day it didn’t make that big of a difference. Still though, huge moment here.

Hogan insists on being in the ring for the celebration which really takes something away from it. The three celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. The moment at the end is huge, but the time it took getting there isn’t worth it. The problem with this show is that it’s WAY too long and there aren’t that many good matches on it. Sixteen matches are WAY too many to have on a single show and the fans were really burned out by the end. This should have been an eight man tournament with some slightly longer matches. Also this show is almost four hours long and the talent pool just wasn’t deep enough to support that back then. Nostalgia is really all that helps this show for most modern fans, but that’s not a terrible thing.

Ratings Comparison

Battle Royal

Original: C

Redo: D+

Ted DiBiase vs. Jim Duggan

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Don Muraco vs. Dino Bravo

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Greg Valentine vs. Ricky Steamboat

Original: C

Redo: C+

Randy Savage vs. Butch Reed

Original: D

Redo: C-

One Man Gang vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts

Original: D

Redo: D-

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules

Original: D

Redo: D+

Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant

Original: C

Redo: C-

Ted DiBiase vs. Don Muraco

Original: C+

Redo: C

Randy Savage vs. Greg Valentine

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Brutus Beefcake vs. Honky Tonk Man

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Islanders/Bobby Heenan vs. British Bulldogs/Koko B. Ware

Original: D+

Redo: C

Randy Savage vs. One Man Gang

Original: D

Redo: D

Demolition vs. Strike Force

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: D

About the same more or less.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/11/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-4-one-big-tournament-and-thats-it/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

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