Summerslam 1992
Date: August 31, 1992
Location: Wembley Stadium, London, England
Attendance: 80,355
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

This is probably the most famous of all the Summerslams even to this day as we’re not only outside but for the first and only time ever, a regular PPV is being held in England. It’s another double main event tonight with Savage vs. Warrior for Savage’s world title, along with Davey Boy Smith challenging Bret for the Intercontinental Title. This show was originally going to be held in Washington D.C. with Shawn winning the title from Bret in the first ladder match but the change was made very close to the date of the show. Let’s get to it.

Also note that this is on a two day tape delay, which you would NEVER see for a PPV today.

For reasons I’m not quite clear on, nearly every version of this show you can find online has the dark matches included, so you’re getting some bonus stuff tonight.

We open with kids arguing over whether Warrior or Savage sold out to Perfect and Flair. Another kid says British Bulldog is going to win whether he likes it or not.

Heenan puts on a crown and declares himself Sir Bobby, King of England.

Dark Match: Nasty Boys/Moutnie vs. Jim Duggan/Bushwhackers

The aisle to the ring is REALLY long so the entrances take extra time this year. Duggan is so beloved that he can get a USA chant going in London. Both teams take turns playing to the crowd before we get going. It’s a big brawl to start with the heels being rammed together in the middle of the ring before rolling to the outside. We finally start with Knobbs vs. Luke but everything breaks down almost immediately with the heels running away.

Things finally settle down with Sags clotheslining Butch down….and everything breaks down a third time in less than five minutes. Duggan sends the Bushwhackers into the corner with the battering ram to all three heels at once to fire up the crowd even more. The Nasties and Mountie are whipped into clotheslines from Duggan but a Jimmy Hart distraction finally lets the heels jump Luke from behind to take over.

The fans chant USA as Mountie hits a jumping back elbow to take down the New Zealander Luke. The Nasties choke away in the corner as Vince is freaking out over the rules being broken this badly. Sags and Mountie both hook reverse chinlocks as the classic six man tag formula is in full effect. Knobbs comes in for a hard whip into the corner but a middle rope splash hits boot. The hot tag brings in Duggan to clean house with clothesline after clothesline. Everything breaks down again and it’s a Battering Ram, the three point clothesline and a missed top rope elbow from Sags to Mountie for the pin by Duggan.

Rating: C+. This was an extended but nicely done tag match. The fans were WAY into Duggan and the pop for the win was a nice response for a dark match. I was surprised by how well this match worked. Most dark matches just drag along and are nothing but rest holds and punching/kicking but this went nearly thirteen minutes and never got dull.

Dark Match: Tito Santana vs. Papa Shango

Shango used to scare me to death. Tito is El Matador so he has the awesome gold jacket. Papa jumps him from behind to take over and hits a splash in the corner to have the bullfighter in trouble. Tito comes back with some clotheslines and a dropkick to send Shango out to the floor. They head back inside where Tito gets two each off a middle rope clothesline and a cross body before hooking a sleeper.

Shango sends him into the buckle to escape as Heenan makes bull jokes about Tito. The voodoo guy keeps up the generic power offense by headbutting Santana down and walking around the ring. Santana avoids a middle rope elbow and makes his comeback but the flying forearm only gets two. Shango pops up and hits a shoulder breaker for the pin.

Rating: D. Shango was all character and no substance in the ring. This is a good example of what most dark matches are like: short, dull and nothing that I’ll remember in about five minutes. Santana was good in this kind of role as he makes everyone look good, although there was only so much he could do with a guy like Shango. Who knew the answer was to make the voodoo guy a pimp?

Dark Match: Tatanka vs. Berzerker

This is the final dark match and is held right before the main event but I’m putting it here for the sake of simplicity. Berzerker wants a test of strength to start and easily takes the smaller Tatanka down. The Native American comes back by easily shoving Berzerker to the floor before they slug it out back inside. They collide after a crisscross but Berzerker misses a dropkick, allowing Tatanka to fire away on the leg.

A World’s Strongest Slam gets two on Tatanka before a regular slam puts him down outside the ring. Back in and Heenan makes Indian jokes as Berzerker kicks Tatanka in the ribs. A backdrop puts Berzerker on the floor before Tatanka starts his war dance back inside. The Papoose to Go is enough for the pin on the viking.

Rating: D. To give you an idea what this match was, think of nothing. Now take away any possible interest that nothing has and you’ll have this match. It was very dull and uninteresting and the fans clearly wanted to see the main event instead of more worthless wrestling. Tatanka would become a pretty big deal against Yokozuna in about a year.

Money Inc. vs. Legion of Doom

This is on the main card with no real fanfare at all. The LOD comes to the ring on motorcycles along with manager Paul Ellering and……dang it…….Rocco the Dummy. There’s nothing more to it than that: it’s a ventriloquist dummy named Rocco who was the team’s “inspiration.” DiBiase is in his white trunks which I couldn’t stand when I first did this show but for some reason they work for me now. Vince gets in one of my favorite lines ever: “The Legion of Doom is well known for their psychology in the ring.” I’ll pause for a minute to let that one sink in.

Hawk starts with DiBiase and it’s Ted sliding to the floor to avoid a right hand. Animal jumps DiBiase on the floor and sends him back inside, only for Hawk to clothesline him right back to the floor. The fans are WAY into the LOD here. Off to Animal vs. IRS with Animal whipping him into the corner and standing on the tie like a smart man would. A gorilla press gets two for Animal before it’s back to Hawk for some arm work.

Irwin comes back with a sleeper but it’s only good for two arm drops before Hawk rams him into the buckle. The top rope clothesline misses IRS though and Hawk falls out to the floor. IRS drops some elbows as for two the fans won’t stop chanting for LOD. Back to DiBiase for some knee drops followed by a chinlock. Jimmy Hart, one of the greatest managers of all time, is yelling at Rocco the dummy. Money Inc. changes off without tagging to send Vince into his usual hysteria.

Hawk finally fights up and rams Ted into the buckle but the hot tag is broken up. The place is going to go nuts when Animal gets in. Ted drops some knees on Hawk and puts on a front facelock but the bird man carries him over towards Animal. IRS breaks up ANOTHER hot tag attempt but gets caught in a double clothesline with Hawk. Animal FINALLY gets the hot tag and cleans house but IRS breaks up the Doomsday Device. Not that it matters much as Animal powerslams DiBiase down for the pin about three seconds later.

Rating: C-. The crowd was HOT for this but it wasn’t much of note. This was part of the three way tag team feud with the Natural Disasters over the fall which ultimately saw Money Inc. coming out with the titles. This was the last appearance for this incarnation of the LOD for years in the WWF because of Rocco. Seriously, Hawk snapped over the idea and didn’t go back to America (to be fair though everyone knew the snap was coming sooner or later).

Ric Flair, in ring gear despite not being in action tonight, is happy to be in London. Gene asks him whose dressing room Mr. Perfect is in. “He’s in the dressing room of the winner of course. WOO!” Touche.

Virgil is ready for Nailz tonight.

Virgil vs. Nailz

There isn’t much to Nailz. He was an escaped convict who wanted revenge on Big Boss Man for abusing him in prison and that’s about it. He attacked Boss Man with the nightstick and Virgil is standing up for his injured friend. Nailz immediately chokes Virgil into the corner but Virgil comes back with some jobber offense. A rollup gets no count on Nailz and it’s back to choking from the convict. We head to the floor and Virgil is rammed into the apron, sending him into a bad acting session. Back in and Nailz hooks a standing chinlock/choke for the win.

Rating: F. There isn’t much to say here. Neither guy was interesting and the match was little more than a way to set up the blowoff match against Boss Man. The problem with that is no one cared about Virgil so all we had was a Nailz squash. Nailz just wasn’t any good and after the Boss Man feud he didn’t have much, other than a horrible sounding feud with Undertaker. Then he went nuts and choked Vince in his office and said he wanted McMahon dead during the steroids trial, basically saving Vince from prison. That’s Nailz’s entire WWF career for all intents and purposes.

Nailz lays Virgil out with the nightstick post match.

Alfred Hayes can’t find Mr. Perfect, nor can he get into Macho Man’s dressing room.

We recap Shawn vs. Rick Martel. Shawn cost Martel an IC Title shot, so Martel started hitting on Shawn’s manager Sherri. Sherri then started coming out to support Martel, setting up the showdown tonight. However since Sherri thought both guys were handsome, she made the rule that there was to be no hitting in the face.

Shawn Michaels vs. Rick Martel

This is the rare heel vs. heel match. Rick is dressed for tennis for some reason I don’t quite grasp. The back of Sherri’s dress is missing, sending Vince into a frenzy over the sight of a thong. Martel grabs a headlock to start and avoids a right hand before doing some jumping jacks. Shawn slides between Martel’s legs and takes over with a dropkick. Apparently dropkicks to the face are legal.

Martel misses a cross body and Shawn cranks on the arm to take over. They trade nip ups but neither guy can bring themselves to throw a punch. Instead Martel, playing the face in the match, sends Shawn over the top to Sherri’s feet. Rick heads to the floor and hugs Sherri who seems very pleased with both men. Back in and they trade rollups with handful of tights each, resulting in Shawn’s tights barely staying on.

Sweet Chin Music to the chest gets two for Shawn and a knee to Martel’s face gets two. Martel rolls him up as well and now they’re ready to fight. They trade slaps to draw Sherri up to the apron…..and she faints. The guys get in a fight over who gets to give her CPR with the fisticuffs breaking out, resulting in a double countout. Sherri pokes her head up to reveal she’s playing possum.

Rating: D+. This didn’t do much for me but it was more of an angle than a match. Sherri would be gone soon after this which kept the story from going anywhere but the match here wasn’t terrible. Shawn would be launching through the roof soon after this by dominating the midcard for the next few years while Martel wouldn’t do much else in the company.

They fight up the aisle until suits break them up. Shawn carries Sherri out but Martel knocks him down, dropping Sherri to the floor in the process. Martel picks her up and carries her a few feet but Shawn decks Martel, knocking Sherri to the floor yet again. Martel finally runs out with a bucket of water to wake Sherri up.

The Nasty Boys talk about the world title match for some reason. They ask Jimmy about a title shot but Jimmy Hart, also the manager of Money Inc. is notably anxious, which is hinting at his face turn.

Tag Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Beverly Brothers

The Brothers are managed by the Genius and are challenging here. Genius messes up his poem by getting some dates wrong but the fans are already cheering for the fat champions anyway. The challengers try to jump the big guys early on but the champions take their heads off with clotheslines. Both Brothers (Beau and Blake) are crushed in a fat man sandwich, leaving us with Typhoon to start against Blake.

Typhoon pounds away on the smaller man but Blake manages to lift him up for a slam. He can’t turn it over but it was a nice try at least. Everything breaks down for a few seconds until we’re back to more Disaster dominance. Quake accidentally splashes Typhoon in the corner and the ocean themed guy is down. The Brothers double team Typhoon with a splash but he launches Beau to the floor on the kickout.

Hang on a second: Shawn Michaels has left Wembley Stadium!

Back to the match with Blake hitting a middle rope headbutt for a delayed two. Beau holds Typhoon on the ropes so Blake can jump on his back in a move later used by Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin. The Brothers take turns pounding on Typhoon and draw Earthquake in, allowing them to double team Typhoon even more. A headbutt gets two for Blake and it’s off to a front facelock.

Typhoon finally makes a tag but the referee doesn’t see it, likely due to being bored by the match so far. Beau drops an ax handle onto Typhoon’s back but the big man FINALLY clotheslines both Beverlies down but stops to slam Beau instead of tagging out. Blake dropkicks his brother into a cross body on Typhoon for two and Quake has had enough. His save attempt is broken up by Genius’ metal scroll to Typhoon’s back as this match just keeps going. Quake breaks up he cover and gets the hot tag to clean house. A powerslam and the Earthquake are enough to retain the titles.

Rating: D. This just wouldn’t stop as the Brothers got WAY too much offense in here. The problem is the same as it was last year: there was no doubt as to who was walking out with the belts and that makes for a rather boring match. Also, the Beverlies are pretty average size guys so there’s only so much they can do against people like the Disasters.

The Bushwhackers speculate on whose corner Perfect will be in. Gene Okerlund makes some very bad British jokes.

Hayes can’t get into the Warrior’s dressing room either. He tries to barge in and calls Warrior rude for locking the door. Even HEENAN points this out to him.

Repo Man vs. Crush

Repo tries to jump Crush but has no effect and earns himself a gorilla press slam. We head to the floor for a clothesline from Crush before heading back inside for some kicks to Repo’s ribs. Crush pounds on the ribs even more and hits a backbreaker, only to be poked in the eye to break the momentum. Repo hits a belly to back suplex but Crush no sells it and snaps off a belly to belly. A top rope knee drop misses and Repo goes after the knee with some very basic stuff. An elbow drop gets two and Crush easily fights up, catches Repo coming off the top in a powerslam and hooks the Head Vice for the submission.

Rating: D. This was a glorified squash to make Crush look good. They were this close to making Crush the next big thing in 1993 so seeing him look good here isn’t surprising at all. Repo Man is really impressive as he went from Smash to the new gimmick so smoothly that I didn’t realize it was the same guy until years later.

We recap the world title match which is summed up in one question: who sold out? This was THE story of the summer as everyone was wondering if Savage would sell out to be able to beat the man that ended his career a year earlier or if Warrior sold out to guarantee his second WWF Title. Why both guys would want a manager who wasn’t even managing the world champion is anyone’s guess. Savage’s line of “I’m the WWF Champion and you’re not!” is great stuff.

WWF World Title: Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior

There’s no sign of Perfect or Flair with Warrior. Warrior is also in a singlet here instead of in his usual trunks. There’s no one with Savage either though, meaning we have to wait even longer to find out who sold out. Savage offers a handshake to start but Warrior accuses him of selling out and won’t shake. Scratch that as he does shake but they pull each other together and it’s on.

It’s a feeling out process to start with Savage shoving him away and hitting a knee to the ribs. A clothesline to the back of Warrior’s head puts him down as the fans are booing. Savage goes up top but Warrior punches him in the ribs to break up a double ax handle. A pair of atomic drops puts Randy down and some shoulder blocks do the same. Savage pounds away and hooks a chinlock, only for Warrior to break it up with a jawbreaker.

A bit right hand staggers the champion in the corner and Warrior stomps away for good measure. Warrior hits a clothesline but Savage ducks away, sending Warrior chest first into the buckle. The champion clotheslines him out to the floor for a bit before hitting the top rope ax handle back inside. It has no effect at all though as Warrior starts marching around the ring. Savage elbows him in the face to put him back down though and goes up again, only to dive into a backbreaker for two.

Warrior whips the champion hard into a corner a few times before putting on a bearhug. Instead of hanging onto it though he lets Savage go almost immediately and gets a two count. Another backbreaker gets two but Savage comes back with a small package for two of his own. A neckbreaker puts the challenger down but a delayed cover only gets two for Randy. Warrior comes back with a hard clothesline and starts pounding away on Savage’s weak back.

A suplex puts Savage down for a close two as the fans are getting into these near falls. Warrior charges at Savage but falls out to the floor by mistake. Randy goes up and drops yet another double ax onto Warrior’s back before sending him into the steps for good measure. Back in and a sunset flip gets two for Savage but Warrior slams him down. Here are Flair and Perfect to ringside as Warrior’s splash hits knees.

Savage and Warrior clothesline each other down which gets two each for both guys. Randy is up first but Perfect trips him down, signaling that Warrior is the sellout. Back up and Warrior punches him down before choking Savage into the corner. Warrior throws Savage into the corner again but the referee is bumped in the process. A slam puts Savage down and Warrior goes up top for a right hand to the head, although there’s no referee.

The referee finally comes over to count the two and Warrior is visibly frustrated. Back up and Savage hits a knee to send Warrior into the referee again before hitting a piledriver on the Ultimate one. There’s no referee again though so Savage goes to check on him. As Randy is out on the floor, Flair and Perfect take out Warrior behind Savage’s back. Randy drops the big elbow but the referee isn’t there in time for a count. Flair and Perfect are huddling on the floor.

Warrior starts his comeback with Savage pounding away on his back but to no effect. He runs over Savage with clotheslines and the flying shoulder block before loading up the gorilla press. Savage is in big trouble but as Warrior sets up the splash, Flair hits him in the back with a chair. Note that Savage didn’t see what Flair did.

Savage doesn’t know what to do now but he realizes Flair and Perfect did something. The champion goes up top but he isn’t sure. Instead of dropping the elbow though he dives at Flair, but gets knocked out of the air by a chair shot, injuring Savage’s knee in the process. Savage is counted out but retains the title.

Rating: B+. This was another really good match between the two and a great rematch from their first classic a year and a half earlier at Wrestlemania 7. The idea of having someone turn was a great incentive to watch the show, and having neither guy do the turn was the right move. The ending of the match is important soon after this.

Post match Flair puts Savage in the Figure Four with Perfect adding in more shots to the leg. Warrior finally saves Savage with a chair and helps him to his feet.

The official attendance is announced.

Undertaker vs. Kamala

Kamala was Undertaker’s Monster of the Month at this point and is managed by Harvey Whippelman. Undertaker rides to the ring on the back of a hearse to kill even more time. Taker fires off uppercuts to start and chokes away in the corner before avoiding a charging Ugandan. Harvey breaks up Old School but Kamala can’t hurt Taker at all. He clotheslines the dead man to the floor but Taker no sells everything Kamala throws at him. Back inside and Taker easily chokeslams him down and hits the Tombstone but Kamala’s other manager Kim Chee comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as it was setting up the coffin match at Survivor Series. This was during the bad period for Undertaker as he fought a bunch of monsters with no particular rhyme or reason. Kamala was nothing special and spent most of his career trying to be intimidating but getting destroyed every time.

Post match Kim Chee helps Kamala lay Undertaker out and the big man hits a top rope splash to Undertaker, but the Dead Man pops up a few seconds later.

Tatanka vs. Berzerker happened here.

British Bulldog talks about fighting hard for two years to reach this point. Yes Bret is the Champion and his brother in law but when they get in the ring together, Bret is a stranger to him. He hopes the families reunite after the match but he’ll be the champion.

Bret says that Davey might not know him but he can look Bret in the eye and see the man that got Smith his start in the company. This is a total heel promo from Bret, which is the right move given where they are tonight. Tonight, Smith’s dream becomes a nightmare.

Here are some Highlanders playing the bagpipes. Their featured performer: Roddy Piper of course.

Diana Hart-Smith, Bret’s sister and Davey’s wife, will be neutral tonight. She just wants them to get along after the match.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Davey Boy Smith

Bulldog has British Commonwealth boxing champion Lennox Lewis leading him to the ring and carrying the Union Jack. The place comes unglued for Davey but Bret isn’t booed at all, as his style is perfect for a crowd like this. Bulldog shoves him into the corner to start before hitting a hard shoulder to send the champion to the floor. Back in and they head to the mat with Bret grabbing a headlock to take over. Bret gets a few near falls off some rollups and it’s right back to the headlock.

Back up again and Davey grabs a hammerlock but Bret hits a HARD elbow to the face to escape, drawing the ire of the fans. Davey takes him down with basic technique and cranks on the armbar. The hold stays on for a good while with the fans getting louder and louder the longer Smith has control. Bret finally sends him into the ropes to escape and drives a knee into Smith’s ribs. The fans boo Hart out of the stadium for a basic move like a knee and boo even louder for a chinlock.

An atomic drop (called a reverse piledriver by Vince) puts Smith down and Bret blocks a crucifix (which worked earlier) in a Samoan Drop for two. Another chinlock is quickly broken but Davey charges into a boot in the corner to put him down again. A bulldog puts Bulldog down but he slams Bret off the top a second later. Davey misses a top rope splash and is sent to the outside, drawing a ton of heat for Bret.

The champion tries a dive to the floor but lands on Davey’s back, nearly breaking several bones in the process. Bret sends him into the post before heading back inside pounding away with European uppercuts. Hart hooks a chinlock for a good while before loading up the Five Moves of Doom. He pulls Bulldog up by the hair to show how evil he is and it’s off to a sleeper. This stays on for a LONG time as well but Smith rams him into the corner to escape again.

They slug it out but Davey drops him out of a gorilla press into the ropes. Three straight clotheslines get two for Smith and a gorilla press gets the same. The delayed vertical and the chest first bump into the buckle get the same. Bulldog hits his powerslam finisher but Bret gets out at two, with far less of a reaction from the crowd than you would expect. Bret rolls through a suplex for two of his own, only to get superplexed down for a near fall.

Back up again and a double clothesline puts both guys down, giving the fans a needed breather. While laying on his back Bret hooks the Sharpshooter ala last year against Mr. Perfect, terrifying the fans. Smith gets the rope so Bret tries a suplex, but Davey drops to his knees and hooks both legs for the pin and the title. The place ERUPTS on the three count.

Rating: A+. This took awhile to get going but once those near falls started it turns into an instant classic. Davey had to win here and it was a perfectly clean pin in the middle of the ring. Bret, ever the critic, doesn’t like this match and basically blames the whole thing on Smith for being spent five minutes in. Those of us in the real world see it for what it is: a masterpiece.

Bret, Davey and Diana embrace to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This is a show where the matches don’t add up to the whole rating. The thing to remember is this show is less than three hours (not counting dark matches which I don’t count towards the show’s rating) and nearly an hour of that is spent on two great matches. The rest of the bad stuff is pretty short and the two main events more than make up for it. This is easily the best Summerslam so far and one of the best ever. Check this out if you’ve somehow never seen it.

Ratings Comparison

Jim Duggan/Bushwhackers vs. Mountie/Nasty Boys

Original: B

Redo: C+

Papa Shango vs. Tito Santana

Original: D+

Redo: D

Tatanka vs. Berzerker

Original: C

Redo: D

Legion of Doom vs. Money Inc.

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Nailz vs. Virgil

Original: C

Redo: F

Shawn Michaels vs. Rick Martel

Original: B

Redo: D+

Beverly Brothers vs. Natural Disasters

Original: D+

Redo: D

Repo Man vs. Crush

Original: C+

Redo: D

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A

Redo: B+

Kamala vs. Undertaker

Original: C

Redo: D

British Bulldog vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A+

Redo: B+

I was WAY too nice to this show the first time. It’s great but it’s not THAT great.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/26/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1992-a-tape-delayed-ppv-yes-really/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Thunder
Date: March 8, 2000
Location: Lawrence Joel Coliseum, Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Attendance: 5,109
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan

Can we please get to Uncensored already? I can’t take much more of Jarrett vs. Sid. It’s not that the match will be bad (even though it will be) but much more than it’s such an uninteresting feud. Jarrett is the US Champion when it could be used on almost anyone else who could use the belt, but instead he’s fighting for the World Title because someone saw a good run from him in the WWF and doesn’t get the idea of “this guy is a career midcarder”. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video on Jeff Jarrett running through WCW. Why must they torment me so?

Opening sequence.

The ramp is off to the side instead of straight down the aisle this time.

Cruiserweight Title: The Artist Formerly Known As Prince Iaukea vs. Psychosis

Prince is defending. Juvy does his Rock stuff and joins commentary, but here’s Rey Mysterio of all people to do the same. Psychosis gets in a few shots from behind to start (isn’t Prince the heel here?) and dropkicks the champ into the corner. Iaukea bails to the floor but Psychosis lands a big dive, followed by some cheap shots from Juvy. You would think Rey would intervene here but I doubt he cares about Iaukea either.

Back in and Prince’s shots to the face have little effect so Psychosis dropkicks him again. The champ pulls the referee into Psychosis, leaving no one to count Prince’s shoulders down on a rollup. Due to his love of law and order, Juvy comes in and counts the pin but amazingly enough that doesn’t count and Prince loses by DQ. Too short to rate but Psychosis was trying to make the most of his time.

The announcers run down the card.

Bam Bam Bigelow apologizes to David Flair/Crowbar/Daffney (the guys are in neck braces) for what Wall did to them recently. There’s a story of Wall being an out of control monster, but you know they’ll screw it up in the end.

Lex Luger tells Ric Flair that Arn Anderson needs to be gone because he’s worthless. Flair says he’ll bring Anderson to Luger tonight.

The Demon vs. Idol

Demon’s casket takes forever to open. Even the production crew doesn’t want to see him. Demon kicks away to start and gets his foot caught in the corner on a boot. Just….dang man. Cue Miss Hancock but Lane won’t let her get on the announcers’ table. Idol comes back with a suplex and powerslam for two, followed by a DDT when Demon ducks his head. Hancock gets on the apron and kisses Idol, allowing Demon to hit a quick cobra clutch slam for the pin. How much longer is he going to be around?

Lane and Idol beat Demon down until Norman Smiley comes out for a failed save attempt.

Curt Hennig can’t wrestle tonight but he’s coming for Luger on Nitro because Luger is a lame bodybuilder.

Jarrett and the Harris Twins plan for later.

Here’s Bam Bam Bigelow who says he’s a laid back guy (huh?) but lately there have been some things going on that he can’t tolerate. He asks David Flair and Crowbar to come out here, even though they can barely walk. Both guys come out and have a seat in the ring so Bigelow can recap their recent attacks by Wall. Ok so he calls the chokeslam a bodyslam but close enough. Kind of.

This is all Bigelow’s fault because he broke the Wall into wrestling. Bigelow thought Wall was a friend, to the point that he made Wall the godfather of his youngest daughter. He apologizes but here’s Wall to interrupt. They say some things we can’t hear and Wall decks him before kicking down the guys with bad necks. It’s table time and Bigelow is thrown (called a chokeslam) through the wood, leaving Wall to beat up David and Crowbar a bit more. Crowbar gets chokeslammed and David gets shoved off the apron and onto Bigelow. Wall walks away with the carnage behind him.

I liked this way more than I should have as it’s a basic story but they’re using the veterans to build up some young guys. David and Crowbar get sympathy while Wall looks like an out of control monster. It puts the focus on the young guys and Bigelow looks like Dr. Frankenstein for introducing this horror to the world. Nice job.

Hogan has a bunch of straps for Flair. Does this require a joke? I didn’t think so either.

The Maestro vs. The Cat

This is the result of Maestro calling Cat out. As you might expect, Cat is a bit faster than Maestro and fires off kicks in the corner, only to miss an elbow drop. That’s enough wrestling as Cat goes for Maestro’s boom box, kicks him low and bashes him in the head with the box for the pin. How inept are WCW referees? I mean…..dang man.

Maestro is thrown to the floor and seems to blame Symphony.

Vampiro is annoyed. Again? Doesn’t he do anything but whine?

After a break, Vampiro is ready for Jarrett and the US Title tonight.

Lash Leroux says he’ll be seeing great things soon. Dustin Rhodes lays Lash out and punches him to ringside so let’s have a match.

Lash Leroux vs. Dustin Rhodes

Dustin punches, Lash punches, low blow, Dustin bulldogs him for the pin in barely a minute.

Post match here’s Terry Funk and he’s got the freaking chicken. I never thought I’d have to say this, but they trade shots with the chicken and fight into the crowd. Somehow, these two would still be at least somewhat active almost fifteen years after this.

Here are Luger and Flair with something to say. After telling a fat boy to sit down (that never gets old), Ric says he needs to apologize to Luger and asks Arn Anderson to come down here, apologize for making Flair look bad and serve Team Package. Arn does come out and Luger actually gives him the Horsemen sign. I keep forgetting he was part of the team at one point so it’s not heresy.

Anderson says he’s been subservient to Ric for so long that he’s forgotten how to stand up for himself. Flair tells him to go shake Lex’s hand but Arn brings up David’s 21^st birthday on Monday. Over the years, he and Ric haven’t been good fathers or husbands due to their schedules but there’s still a chance for Ric to be good to David. Ric’s career is going to be ending soon (again, Flair is still occasionally active at least twelve years after this show. That’s kind of amazing and sad at the same time) and it’s time for him to be a good father to David.

Arn is out here because David can’t be and asks why Luger is always out for himself. Like, why is this Team Package and not Team Flair? Ric says he’s done being a father and is ready for the team to ride again, if Anderson is willing to be Double A again. Anderson comes back by saying he’s got a fight or two left in them, but the real Double A would walk over Luger to get to the good fight. That’s such an awesome line and I have a feeling Luger has no idea what Anderson meant. Lex calls this all gibberish and tells Flair that he already has two strikes. If Flair lets him lose to Hennig on Monday, Ric is out.

As usual, when they let Luger stay in the background and not say much, Anderson and Flair can talk as well as any pair that I can think of. There’s a natural chemistry there that works so well and you can’t teach it. However, I’m hoping this leads somewhere with David, because otherwise it’s being wasted on Flair and Luger, who don’t need a story and Arn who is retired. Great segment, but I’m not sure I like where it’s leading.

Vampiro beats Finlay up in the back. This is a weird story as Vampiro is feuding with Jeff Jarrett in the main event scene and has this mini-side feud with Finlay.

Luger and Liz leave.

Meng vs. Fit Finlay

They slug it out and here’s Tank Abbott about thirty seconds in for the DQ.

Security breaks it up in a few seconds, making this totally worthless.

The Mamalukes are ready for their four corner elimination match tonight. Wait that’s just thrown on a Thunder? Well of course it is.

Tag Team Titles: Mamalukes vs. Harris Brothers vs. Harlem Heat vs. Kidman/Booker T.

Mamalukes are defending, anyone can tag anyone, one elimination per team. I guess the Twins made bail. The champs and the Twins brawl to start and we get the bell before the other teams get here. Harlem Heat slowly comes out to join in with Booker coming out alone a few seconds later. Everyone hits everyone and Vito clotheslines Booker to break up a Spinarooni. What an uncultured swine.

Kidman and Torrie make their own entrance and all eight guys are in the ring at once so there’s almost no way to call this. We finally settle down to Stevie kneeing Booker in the chest until Booker kicks both of them in the ribs and pins Big T. off a side Russian legsweep of all things. Booker T. was the cure to the Armstrong Curse all along? Booker tags in Kidman to face Johnny and we take a break.

Back with with Kidman and Booker eliminated after Booker accidentally kicked Kidman in a reversal of Monday’s mistake. So it’s the Tag Team Title match at the pay per view on Thunder because WCW is stupid enough to not think this stuff through. Vito drops a top rope elbow for two on Don but Ron cleans house for the save. The H Bomb gets two more on Johnny with Disco coming in with a title belt for the cheap shot, allowing Johnny to get the retaining pin.

Rating: D+. So let’s recap: a Russian legsweep, a misfire that aired during a commercial and a pin off a belt shot from a manager, with the final two teams being the title match at the pay per view. How in the world did anyone think this was a good idea? Why not do a three way tag without the champs in there and then do a post match brawl? You get the challengers looking strong and don’t have the champions pin them. That felt so strange to type out because it’s such a stupid idea in the first place. The match was too full of action to be coherent but at least it wasn’t dull.

Disco takes an H Bomb post match but Vito clears the ring.

Stevie Ray says that was a two count and wants to fight Kidman and Booker on Nitro.

Diamond Dallas Page was on the Late Late Show. When is he going to be on the Bad Wrestling Show?

Long Sid vs. Jarrett video.

The Dog slobbers as Brian Knobbs talks about being hardcore. Yes, his entire character is that he’s basically a humanoid dog.

US Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Vampiro

Jarrett is defending but first he asks if the girls want to flash Vampiro to distract him. He even asks the fans but then says no chance because the girls are going to the back where they belong. Vampiro starts fast and clotheslines Jarrett outside for some rams into the announcers’ table. Cue the Harris Twins to get in some cheap shots, allowing Jarrett to take over with a clothesline. So not only is Jarrett boring but he has boring help.

Jeff kicks him back outside so the Twins can get in some more shots, only to have the Mamalukes out to even things up. Vampiro and the Mamalukes sounds like a pretty sweet detective agency comedy. Back in and Vampiro plants Jarrett with a Rock Bottom but the referee is yelling at the tag teams.

Jarrett’s chair is taken away so he has to settle for two off a DDT. Nick Patrick gets bumped because WCW doesn’t know how to do anything else. Vampiro catapults Jeff into the corner and nails him with the belt as another referee comes out, only to have Patrick pull him to the floor at two. As they argue, Jarrett Strokes Vampiro onto the title to retain.

Rating: D. They’re doing a decent job of making Vampiro look like something interesting but it doesn’t help that he’s constantly jobbing every time he’s in there. Would it hurt to let him beat a Harris Brother? Or to beat someone not in the NWO so that he can actually get a win? Jarrett and the twins continue to suck the life out of anything they’re associated with and it’s already old.

Vampiro takes an H Bomb and gets spray painted to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. It says a lot that the second best segment of the show was Bam Bam Bigelow talking to the Wall. The wrestling was really lacking to barely there and somehow that might be the best option here. WCW’s wrestling really isn’t worth watching most of the time due to the people in there and how little time they have but their talking is usually good. Anderson and Flair continue to be masters, but they need to do something with someone young, because the former Horsemen don’t need a rub.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Ring of Honor
Date: July 29, 2015
Location: Terminal 5, New York City, New York
Commentators: King Corino, Kevin Kelly

We’re now past Death Before Dishonor but TV has yet to catch up with the results. Last week was a special historical show as Ring of Honor hit two hundred episodes, leaving only an eight person tag for new wrestling. It should be interesting to see where things go tonight as we get closer to All Star Extravaganza. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Matt Taven/Michael Bennett vs. Corey Hollis/Jonathan Gresham

Taven and Bennett’s IWGP Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. The jobbers (as named by the fans) get superkicked to start and Maria jumps in on commentary. Taven and Bennett destroy the guys on the floor with Bennett getting in a fan’s face as he chants LET’S GO JOBBERS. They settle down in the ring with Gresham getting in a few shots until Taven kicks him in the ribs, with Maria’s “see, I told you so” attitude being so perfect.

Gresham dives through the legs for a tag to Hollis, who comes in off a double missile dropkick. It doesn’t last long though as a superkick sends Hollis into a spear from Taven for two with Gresham making the save. Bennett is thrown into the ropes for a snap German suplex, only to have Taven springboard in with a kick to the face. They’re doing a good job here at the false hope spots. Hail Mary (Maria’s real name and a spike piledriver) ends Hollis at 4:27.

Rating: C-. Maria gets better every time she’s out there. The attitude of knowing she looks incredible and talking down to everyone with the bonus of believing she’s right while not sounding insulting is what Stephanie fails to be more often than not. It was also nice to let this have a few minutes instead of just having the champs crush them. Good little squash here.

Caprice Coleman vs. Bob Evans vs. Silas Young vs. Cheeseburger vs. Moose vs. Dalton Castle

Heel manager Prince Nana comes out for commentary to watch Moose, his protege, which hasn’t been mentioned since they debuted on Destination America. This is one fall to a finish and going to the floor is as good as a tag. The fans favor Castle before things get going. Castle and Moose start but Evans and Cheeseburger tag in before anything can happen.

Evans tags out to Silas out of the fear of Cheeseburger (a manly vegetarian perhaps?) as we’re still waiting on contact. Silas easily wins a test of strength on the tiny Cheeseburger but he rolls away and elbows Silas in the ribs to take over. As Kelly explains the Cheeseburger name (he needed to put on weight so he was told to eat cheeseburgers. That’s not a very good story), Silas throws Cheeseburger to the floor, meaning Coleman can come in legally and take a shoulder block.

We take a break and come back with Moose splashing Young in the corner. Coleman hurricanranas Young off the top but Evans shoves him out to the floor. More people are shoved out until it’s Castle and Silas left alone, only to have Castle take too much time strutting and get nailed in the back of the head (there’s no way I can say nailed from behind and not get a bunch of jokes).

Castle slaps on a chinlock (that’s a rare sight in ROH) but Dalton’s boys wave him back to his feet. A quick suplex puts Young down but Evans tags himself in, only to walk into a backdrop from Dalton. Off to Moose to clean house, including throwing Cheeseburger onto Evans, allowing Coleman to hit a flip dive onto both of them. Young breaks up a Moose dive (that could be awesome to see) but we do get Moose dropkicking Young off the top.

Now we get a flip dive from Moose (not a bad one either) and I’m really seeing the potential this guy has. Dalton breaks up a spear to Cheeseburger and it’s time for the parade of secondary finishers. Castle muscles Moose over in a delayed German suplex to freak out Prince Nana. Evans rolls up Moose and puts his feet on the ropes until Cheeseburger makes the save, leaving Moose to spear Evans down for the pin at 13:10.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t really feeling this one as it was just kind of a big mess with everyone fighting everyone for the sake of fighting everyone. Moose winning is the right idea as he could be a good monster down the line but the fans wanted to see Castle here. Unfortunately there was too much going on to really make sense of the match and it was too much at once. At least one of the right guys won though.

Here’s the Decade with something to say. BJ Whitmer talks about Colby Corino becoming a man right in front of the fans’ eyes, which means he has more heart than anyone in the locker room or even at ringside (with a sneer at King Corino). Whitmer praises Colby for how close he came to beating Moose and War Machine (he was squashed both times) and now sees him as his own son. BJ hopes that Colby sees him like the father he never had and tonight, Colby is getting a gift. Tonight, Colby gets to have a gauntlet match against four guys from the last tryout camp.

Colby’s four opponents combine to weigh over 1,800 pounds and that’s too much for King Corino. King gets in the ring and takes off his tie but Whitmer says this isn’t going to make up for abandoning his son. He abandoned Colby, so how long will it be before he abandons his wife and baby son? Nigel McGuinness has to come out and break up the fight as we go to another break.

I’m digging this feud as it’s built up very well, even though ROH hasn’t felt the need to say why Whitmer and Corino hate each other in the first place. Again: stop assuming we watch all of your shows and give us a thirty second recap. You know you’ve been on this new channel for like two months now, so a quick recap won’t kill you.

Back from a break with Nigel McGuinness on commentary in Corino’s place.

ACH vs. Bobby Fish

The fans are split here and Fish takes ACH down to the mat to start. ACH isn’t exactly on top of his game on the ground so he grabs a headlock to try to get back to his feet. An unnecessary cartwheel into a moonsault sets up a dropkick to put Fish down in the corner as we’re definitely seeing a contrast of styles. Bad News Barrett’s jump from the middle rope and swing around into a suplex gets two and Fish is sent to the floor where he avoids a dive as we take a break.

Back with ACH firing off some chops (for some lame WOOs) and it’s time to hit the kickoff, because what would ROH be without kicking at each other like it’s a kickboxing fight. ACH can’t follow up because of the work Fish did to his ribs during the break (nothing wrong with some basic psychology) and Fish drops him with a fall away slam. Kelly: “We invite you to order the replay of Death Before Dishonor on ROHwrestling.com! Well, order it after this match!” That was good for a chuckle.

Fish goes back to the ribs but ACH Matrixes back to avoid a cross body. That’s always a cool looking counter. Fish bails to the floor, allowing ACH to hit a sweet looking shooting star plancha. ACH hurts his knee coming back in off the top but is still able to kick Fish with the good leg for two. The 450 hits knees to bang up the ribs again and Fish goes to the two injured body parts. The Fish Hook knee bar has ACH in trouble but he bridges back into a rollup to make Fish break the hold. ACH gets kicked down on top though and a top rope falcon’s arrow gives Fish the pin at 12:55.

Rating: C+. I liked the match but it went on a bit too long. Also I would have liked the Fish Hook to make Fish tap as they spent the whole match building up the leg injury and then the submission hold is just another spot. ACH is good in the Kofi Kingston’s role of the high flier with almost no personality to speak of but you kind of knew he was going to lose here.

Overall Rating: C-. This could have been a lot worse but it’s one of those shows that ROH has to deal with: they’re after a pay per view but can’t spoil anything so we get these matches which could take place on any given night. It’s not bad, but it’s a total stand alone show with no long term consequences. Watchable enough, but nothing great.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Due to cardiac arrest.  This is starting to make the rounds from TMZ and then Meltzer (http://www.f4wonline.com/more/more-top-stories/96-wwe-news/43860-roddy-piper-passes-away).  If so, this is a huge shock as Piper had plans to be on a podcast today and was giving interviews over the recent Hogan issues.

This is a huge shock and it’s going to take a bit for me to process it.  More on this later of course but I’m stunned at the moment.  Piper was a huge star when I was growing up and one of the first big stars I remember.

Lucha Underground
Date: July 29, 2015
Location: Lucha Underground Arena, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Matt Striker, Vampiro

We have arrived. Tonight is a rare idea in wrestling as we’re at a season finale, in this case called Ultima Lucha. This is the first of two shows as there was too much to contain in one show. One of the major matches tonight is going to be for the Trios Titles with Angelico/Son of Havoc/Ivelisse defending against the Disciples of Death, who I don’t remember having an actual match yet. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on Cage vs. The Mack, Drago vs. Hernandez and the Trios Title match so I’m guessing that’s what we get tonight.

Black Lotus is working out in her cage when Dario Cueto comes in wearing a tuxedo and sipping champagne. Dario talks about pitbulls becoming monsters because their masters make them hurt people. That’s what happened to Dario’s brother, but he didn’t kill Lotus’ parents. It was El Drago Azteca, Lotus’ master, who killed them and blamed Cueto’s brother. Dario leaves Lotus to think about that because he has a show to run. Lotus is so angry that she starts pounding the wall, which seems to start giving way.

The announcers run down tonight’s card, with the three matches from the opening recap.

The Mack vs. Cage

Falls count anywhere. Mack beat Cage twice in a row and then brawled around the arena with him to set this up. Cage jumps Mack during his entrance and they’re fighting early. A slam onto the roof of Cueto’s office has Mack in trouble as this is one sided so far. As I type that of course, Mack suplexes him onto the bleachers for two.

Cage is whipped through the door to a storage closet but he finds a fire extinguisher and a stop sign. Why a stop sign is in a storage room of a wrestling arena isn’t clear but Cage’s DDT onto the sign is good for two. Mack comes back with a cooler of beer and blasts Cage in the head before opening the cooler, popping some beers and hitting a Stunner for two on the floor! Striker: “THAT COOLER HAD A FAMILY!” I usually can’t stand Striker but he has just won the entire night. The beers into a Stunner were awesome too.

Cage tries to head towards the ring (they haven’t actually been inside yet) but gets powerbombed off the top and through a table at the floor for two. That was quite the crash and quite the kickout too. They head into the balcony and Mack spinebusts Cage through it for a near fall. Vampiro: “I NEED TO TAKE A SHOWER OR SOMETHING!”

Cage superplexes Mack from one side of the balcony to the other for two, which gets a bigger reaction than it probably should have, which is the sign of a white hot (or well paid) crowd. There are some cinder blocks on the balcony for no logically explained reason and Cage, just because he’s all violent, curb stomps Mack’s face through one for the pin in quite a violent finish.

Rating: B. Oh yeah this is going to be fun. The Stunner spot had me loving this and the violence was a great choice to open the show and fire up an already hot crowd. Cage continues to be one of the bright spots here and I saw some of the potential in Mack that I haven’t quite seen before. Really, really fun opener that didn’t actually get inside the ring, which makes perfect sense here: if they can fight anywhere and want to hurt each other, why would you go inside a ring?

We run down next week’s two hour card. I’m really glad about that as I was wondering how they could fit that many big matches in just an hour.

Trios Tag Team Titles: Disciples of Death vs. Angelico/Son of Havoc/Ivelisse

The Disciples (Barrio Negro, El Siniestro de la Muerte, Terce) are challenging and have Catrina in their corner. This is under tornado rules so no tagging. Ivelisse still has a broken leg and comes in on crutches to make this even more of an uphill climb for the champions who can’t get along. At least the Disciples have different color masks so it’s not another Crew situation.

The champs get jumped to start as this is already looking one sided due to Ivelisse’s injuries. Havoc and Angelico fight back and hit a dive each and the standing shooting start gets two on Barrio. Ivelisse gets dragged in though and the champs are in trouble again as she gets caught in a Brock Lock. Havoc finally makes a save as the Disciples were staring at her and laughing in a creepy moment.

Siniestro and Angelico go up towards the balcony and this can’t end well. A backdrop puts Angelico down on the bleachers, leaving Havoc to fight off two guys at once. Angelico is up though and goes even bigger this time, diving onto the two Disciples at ringside instead of in the ring for a VERY scary landing.

With everyone down at ringside, Catrina gets in the ring and holds up the stone to wake up the Disciples. Ivelisse gets in on her crutches but throws them away and takes Catrina down for a beating. The stone goes flying and the Disciples are in trouble, only to have Catrina get the stone back and blast Ivelisse in the face to give Negro the pin and the titles. That’s the first title change in company history.

Rating: C. Total insanity which loses a bit of its strength after the previous brawl but at least this was fun. Catrina having all the gold is an interesting idea and I kind of like the fact that we still only kind of know what her deal is. They told a good story here too as Ivelisse was too weak of a link this time and even the big dive from Angelico wasn’t enough to survive yet again. It makes sense that they lose and you could easily do a rematch once Ivelisse is healthy.

The announcers drink a “so refreshing, so good” beer in a totally spontaneous and not at all compensated moment.

Drago vs. Hernandez

This is Believer’s Backlash, meaning the fans at ringside have straps. Drago came back and took the #1 contendership, causing Hernandez to beat him with a strap. Then things got serious when Hernandez said dragons weren’t real. Hernandez jumps Drago to start, then easily jumps to the top rope to dropkick Drago to the floor. We get the obvious reaction as the fans don’t attack Drago but beat the tar out of Hernandez as soon as he goes to the floor.

Back in and Drago kicks Hernandez in the face to take over as Hernandez realizes he can’t go outside. Drago is fine with knocking Hernandez outside for a whipping with a good sized guy getting in a big shot. Hernandez finally figures out that he needs to stay inside and keep Drago down so he scores with an Alpha Bomb but the top rope splash hits knees. Drago tries a slam for some reason but opts for the Dragon’s tail (or whatever that rollup is called) instead.

Hernandez is all ticked off and strong and such so he Border Tosses Drago onto the fans for a huge crash. When all else fails, throw people at other people. Hernandez loads up a dive but we’ve got mist to knock him out of the air. The big blind guy crawls under the ring, leaving Drago to pull out a table. Cue Hernandez from under the ring but the fans are waiting on him with a beating. Hernandez finally has enough and takes a strap from one of the fans……so Drago pulls out nunchucks to beat the tar out of him instead. A frog splash puts Hernandez through the table and another splash in the ring gives Drago the pin.

Rating: C+. Fun main event here with Drago (who is somehow 40) getting a definitive win over Hernandez, who is one of the bigger heels in the promotion. There’s a future for Dragon as a top name in a second season but this was more about the fans than anything else. This worked, but the Trios Titles probably should have wrapped things up.

El Dragon Azteca (I think) is walking in front of the temple when someone in a white hoodie comes out. They spar for a bit before Dragon says he has to save her. The hoodie guy (apparently the one that Dragon saved at the beginning of the season) says that Puma can help and Dragon doesn’t have to go in and save Lotus because of a prophecy that says Dragon dies if he enters the temple. Dragon goes in anyway to end the show. I really have no idea what is going on with this Dragon Azteca/Black Lotus story but DANG if it’s not awesome.

Overall Rating: B+. Oh yeah Lucha Underground is awesome. They’ve set up this show all year and this was really just a glorified pre-show before we get to the major matches. The Black Lotus stuff has me really intrigued and I’m wondering how big of a story it’s going to become as it seems perfect for a cliffhanger to end the season. The wrestling here worked more than well enough and I was getting way into it after about two minutes, which is how a major show should feel. I’m hoping this doesn’t end because it’s such an entertaining show and it had a great start to Ultima Lucha.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 1991
Date: August 26, 1991
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Roddy Piper, Gorilla Monsoon

This is a show that almost no one remembers other than one match. The main event is Hogan/Warrior vs. Slaughter/Adnan/Mustafa, which would have been a much better match a few months ago when Slaughter was still a threat. Other than that we have the wedding of Savage and Miss Elizabeth who reunited at Wrestlemania VII in one of the best moments in company history. Let’s get to it.

We open with Savage in the back getting ready while Alfred Hayes asks him questions. Savage says that he’s ready and in the danger zone, but HAYES’ TIE IS CROOKED. “NOW YOU’RE OK AND IT’S TIME TO GO CHECK MY BABY BLUE EYES!”

We get the regular intro with the theme of a match made in Heaven and a match made in Hell.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Off to Tornado and the fans go nuts as he rams Herc’s head into the buckle. Ten right hands to the head in the corner have Hercules in even more trouble but it’s off to Warlord vs. Bulldog which was a decent power feud. Bulldog hits the suplex for two and it’s off to Steamboat for a top rope chop to the head. Warlord blocks a monkey flip though and it’s back to Roma with a suplex of his own for two. Three straight backbreakers have Steamboat in even more trouble before it’s back to Hercules for a gorilla press.

Steamboat starts fighting back but gets caught in a big hotshot to put him down. Here’s Warlord again but he dives into two feet from Steamboat, allowing for the tag off to Tornado. The Texan cleans house but makes a blind tag to Bulldog who hits a cross body. That plus the Tornado Punch to Warlord is good for two as everything breaks down. Bulldog powerslams Roma down and Ssteamboat adds the high cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

Sean Mooney says to call some hotline to hear prerecorded comments from Liz and Savage!

Mr. Perfect says he’s an awesome champion.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Bret Hart

Perfect has been champion since last November so he’s a pretty big deal. He also has his Coach (former wrestler John Tolos) with him. Stu and Helen Hart are in the audience to watch their son. Feeling out process to start with Bret scoring first by hip tossing Perfect to the floor. Back in and Bret grabs a headlock followed by a crucifix for two. Bret puts the headlock on again as Heenan and Piper are going to war on commentary. Gorilla: “WILL YOU STOP???”

Perfect grabs at the hair to escape and chops Bret’s chest off. A slam puts Bret down but he kicks Perfect away and slams him down, only to have Perfect kick him right back. Bret is all like screw this wrestling stuff and clotheslines Perfect to the floor. The champ tries to run but Bret throws him back in and the dude in pink is mad. Perfect gets in a HARD kick to the ribs and Bret is sent to the floor where Coach whistles at him.

Bret tries to get up but is knocked off the apron and right on top of a production guy who has a very confused look on his face. Back in and Bret jumps over Perfect in the corner and gets two off a rollup. The fans are WAY into this so far. Perfect sends Bret chest first into the buckle to take over again as Heenan is starting to lose his marbles. Another hard whip into the buckle gets two for the champion followed by the Hennig neck snap for two more.

Hart is sent to the floor for a bit and they both come back in on the top. It’s Bret crashing down to the mat to give Perfect two as Heenan is thinking Perfect should get himself disqualified. The champ hooks a sleeper but Bret fights up into a crucifix, only to be dropped down into a Samoan drop for two. The PerfectPlex looks to finish Bret but it only gets two, sending MSG into delirium.

Back up and Bret fights back, sending Perfect across the ring and crotch first into the post. A suplex and small package get two each for Bret and it’s Five Moves of Doom time. Bret yells at the referee and gets rolled up for two before Bret starts going after the knee. He loads up the Sharpshooter but he has to knock Coach to the floor. The distraction lets Perfect get in a shot to take over. Perfect drops a leg between Bret’s legs but as he tries it again, Bret grabs the leg and puts the Sharpshooter on from his back. He turns the hold over and Perfect submits really fast but it’s good for Bret’s first singles title.

Rating: A. Oh come on it’s Bret vs. Perfect from Summerslam 91. Do I really need to explain this one? It’s one of the best matches of all time and holds up over twenty years later. The counter by Bret is a great way to show how solid of a mat wrestler he was. Kicking out of the PerfectPlex was the perfect idea as Bret took the champ’s best shots and still won. It’s still excellent and required viewing for wrestling fans.

Bret celebrates with his parents.

The Bushwhackers are ready for the Natural Disasters and Andre is ready for Earthquake, the man who broke his leg a few weeks back.

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Andre looks terrible here and would be dead in less than 18 months. The Whackers sneak up on the big men on the floor and poke them in the eyes. We finally start with Butch vs. Typhoon and the big man being bitten on the trunks. Earthquake tries to come in but splashes his own partner by mistake. A double clothesline puts Quake down and the Bushwhackers are in full control.

Earthquake finally realizes he weighs more than both Bushwhackers put together and pounds Butch down with a few shots to the back. Heenan makes an obscure Newhart reference as Quake slams Butch into the corner but misses an elbow drop to the back. The second attempt connects though and it’s off to Typhoon for more fat man offense.

Off to an over the shoulder backbreaker on Butch which transitions into a bearhug by Earthquake. Heenan leaves to go find Hogan and embarrass him which we’ll get to later. Quake finally hits Typhoon with a clothesline by mistake as everything breaks down. The Bushwhackers hit Battering Rams on both Disasters but it’s finally the big men crushing Luke and the Earthquake for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was a waste of time and everyone knew it was going to be from the moment the bell rang. The Bushwhackers were the epitome of comedy bumpkins and there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m not sure why they picked them of all teams for Andre to back and the match was horrible.

Post match the Disasters go after Andre but the LOD comes out for the save. This was Andre’s last appearance for the company.

Heenan goes to Hogan’s dressing room with the NWA World Title to issue a challenge. “Hogan” (you never see him) opens the door and slams it in Heenan’s face. For the life of me I can’t get over seeing that belt in the WWF.

Virgil recaps his feud with DiBiase. You’re probably familiar with this one: Virgil was his bodyguard for years but at the Rumble, DiBiase pushed him just once too often and Virgil snapped. DiBiase lost to Virgil via countout at Wrestlemania and tonight it’s a rematch with the Million Dollar Title on the line.

Million Dollar Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Virgil

This is one of the very rare defenses of this title. DiBiase has Sensational Sherri with him. Piper is Virgil’s mentor so the commentary is going to be rather slanted. Virgil starts fast and hits three straight clotheslines to send DiBiase out to the floor. Heenan is back on commentary but doesn’t want to talk about Hogan. Virgil misses a dive to the floor and DiBiase sends him into the steps to keep him down. Back inside and Ted is in full control but he brags too much and gets caught in the Million Dollar Dream. The fans go nuts but Sherri comes in and blasts Virgil with her loaded purse for the DQ.

Rating: D. Actually hang on a minute.

The referee says the match MUST continue, sending Sherri to the back and Roddy into delirium. Virgil pounds on DiBiase in the corner but since he doesn’t have much experience he can’t do anything. He tries to whip DiBiase across the ring but gets countered into a ref bump to put both guys down. Ted yells at Piper like the true heel that he is before suplexing Virgil down. A piledriver lays Virgil out but sicne there’s no referee, DiBiase rips the turnbuckle off instead. Ted yells at Piper once too often though, allowing Virgil to ram him into the buckle twice for the pin and the title. Piper goes NUTS.

Rating: D+. This is a good example of a match where the crowd and announcing make it much better than it would have been otherwise. Virgil just wasn’t that good and this was his one and only storyline with the company due to there being nothing else to his character. How the guy kept a job for so many years with both WWF and WCW is beyond me.

The Mountie is ready for his Jailhouse Match with Boss Man. We get a clip of him shocking a handcuffed Boss Man from a few weeks ago. Moutnie insults the New York cops who take the loser to jail later tonight.

Boss Man says Mountie is going to jail tonight.

Mountie vs. Big Boss Man

Mountie talks trash to start so Boss Man punches him in the mouth to take over. They slug it out with Boss Man hitting a back elbow and a splash for two. Boss Man hits his running crotch attack to the back of Mountie’s neck followed by the sliding uppercut. Mountie dives into a good looking spinebuster for two but Boss Man chases Jimmy Hart instead of following up, earning him a trip into the steps.

Back in and Boss Man misses a splash in the corner as Heenan says it’s not Mayberry for the Boss Man tonight. Mountie gets two each off some elbows and a dropkick but the kickout sends him to the floor. He pulls Boss Man to the floor as Gorilla calls Jimmy a walking advertisement for birth control. Back in and they slug it out with Mountie hitting a piledriver for no cover. Instead Mountie gets his shock stick but only hits the mat. A hard uppercut sets up the Boss Man Slam for two (I don’t remember anyone not named Hogan kicking out of that) before another piledriver attempt is countered into an Alabama Slam to end Mountie.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen far worse and Boss Man’s high impact offense is always worth a look. This is the perfect blowoff to the feud which is something you rarely see anymore. Today feuds just keep going with some random gimmick match which may or may not fit the feud. This was the logical ending to it and it was tailor made for the blowoff. Why thy don’t do this anymore is beyond me.

Mountie is dragged away by cops.

DiBiase goes on a huge rant about the title, saying that Virgil stole it and he’ll get it back.

Bret says this is the best day of his career and he waited a long time to prove how great he is. I’m pretty sure we’re in intermission.

The Natural Disasters are going to eat the Legion of Doom for dinner.

Boss Man asks Sean Mooney what kind of bird can’t fly. A jailbird of course. He brags about winning a bit more.

Savage is nervous for the wedding.

Speaking of the wedding, here’s the phone number again, complete with a countdown clock for a five minute intermission. Seriously they just count down five minutes of dead air time. AND THIS WAS ON THE HOME VIDEO.

Mountie arrives at the jail and shouts that the cops can’t do this to him because HE’S THE MOUNTIE! He tries to read the cops their rights and gets thrown in a cell.

Jimmy Hart is panicking while his Nasty Boys are read for the LOD. It’s a street fight later tonight.

Mountie is tricked into having his picture taken.

The Legion of Doom wants the tag titles. Hawk says once they win the belts they’re going to chew up the Natural Disasters and spit them out “like the tartar that sticks to your teeth.”

Mountie yells about having being fingerprinted. These bits are so overblown that they’re hilarious.

Sgt. Slaughter and his cronies are excited about having a 3-2 advantage. Slaughter says he might have a surprise for later.

Sid Justice, the referee for the main event tonight, says that he’ll call it down the middle. Gene shows us a video of Slaughter and company offering Sid a spot on the team but Sid says they stopped him but he turned them down.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Legion of Doom

The Nasties are defending and this is No Countout/No DQ, making it a street fight in modern terms. The champions are sent to the floor and the fight is on early. Back in the ring Animal hits a quick powerbomb on Knobbs for two followed by Hawk enziguring Sags down. We get down to the stupid tagging part of the street fight with Sags sending Hawk to the floor and hitting him with a bucket of water.

Back in and Knobbs works over Hawk in the corner before Sags sends him into the steps. A back elbow gets two for Knobbs and a top rope version gets the same for Sags. Brian goes up top again but jumps into Hawk’s boot, finally allowing for the hot tag off to Animal. Everything breaks down and Sags hits Animal in the back with Jimmy’s helmet for two. Hawk steals the helmet and lays out both Nasties, setting up the Doomsday Device on Sags for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This SUCKED as the street fight rule was barely used at all. It was little more than a few shots with the helmet when the referee wasn’t looking anyway. Hawk and Animal barely broke a sweat out there as they were already talking about the Natural Disasters earlier tonight instead of worrying about winning the belts. This win was a long time coming though.

The Mountie is put in a cell by some VERY sweaty policemen.

I.R.S. vs. Greg Valentine

Uh…..sure. Feeling out process to start so Gorilla recaps the show so far. Valentine takes over with a quick shoulder block and a clothesline. Somehow we’re nearly two minutes into the match with this much action. IRS rolls to the floor as Gorilla says Undertaker and Jake Roberts might be here. Back in and Valentine slams him down, sending IRS right back to the floor.

The tax guy heads in again and puts on an abdominal stretch followed by a jumping clothesline for no cover. Off to a chinlock before IRS misses a knee into the corner, giving Greg the opening on the leg. The Figure Four is quickly broken by a grab of the ropes and a second attempt at the hold is countered into a small package for the pin by IRS.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t even that bad but it had no business being on a pay per view. This would be the equivalent of the Divas match on a modern show to give the fans a breather between the big matches. Valentine was long past his point of being a star but he could still put people over like he did here.

Buy Hulk Hogan’s PPV, which is a Best of Hogan show. I’ve heard of worse ideas.

Hogan and Warrior talk about their victims in the main event.

Ultimate Warrior/Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Sid Justice is guest referee and Hogan is WWF Champion. Hogan and Slaughter get things going but the Sarge wants to stall. Slaughter pounds on him in the corner but gets caught between the right hands of both superheroes. Off to Warrior for a clothesline followed by a double big boot to put Slaughter down again. A clothesline gets two for Hogan and it’s back to Warrior. This is completely one sided so far. Hogan comes back in with a middle rope ax handle for two.

Sid breaks up some choking in the corner and the distraction lets Slaughter get in some shots on Hogan. Adnan, an old manager, comes in to rake Hogan’s back and slowly pound away in the corner. Off to Mustafa (Iron Sheik) for the gutwrench suplex and the camel clutch but Warrior makes the save. Slaughter comes back in to choke away in the corner and send Hogan into Sid for a staredown. Sarge jumps the distracted Hogan and stomps away on the back.

Warrior breaks up a top rope something by Slaughter, allowing for the hot tag to the painted one. Warrior cleans house on Slaughter but runs into Sid for another staredown. Back to Mustafa who gets caught in a suplex but Slaughter blocks a tag. Slaughter puts Warrior in a chinlock, only to have the Ultimate One fight up and clothesline Sarge down. There’s the hot tag to Hogan as Hogan chases the lackeys to the back with a chair. More on that later as Hogan throws powder in Slaughter’s face and drops the leg to win.

Rating: D+. I’m not a fan of this one as the match was never in doubt at all, but above that the Iraq War had been over for six months so the interest in the feud was done long ago. Nothing to see here but the fans reacted pretty well to it. This would have been better as a house show main event instead of the main event of Summerslam. If nothing else there was a match around this time on a Coliseum Video with Slaughter/Mustafa/Undertaker against the superheroes. Wouldn’t that make a much better main event here?

Hogan and Sid pose for a long time post match.

Mountie is in jail and a fat biker hits on him.

Hogan and Sid are STILL posing.

We get the video of Savage proposing to Liz and her responding with an OH YEAH. We also get a four minute music video highlighting their entire history together to a sappy love song.

The ring is set up like a chapel for the wedding. Savage comes out in a shiny tux with a big feather on his hat. Heenan: “Why is the second most important guy called the best man?” From what I’ve read this is a legit renewal of vows as the two were already married in real life. There isn’t much to say here other than it’s a wedding and no one interrupts it. This takes like ten minutes.

With the show in the arena done we go to the reception with Savage telling Heenan to beat it. Gene Okerlund does the ceremonial toast. They have the first dance and everything seems to be fine. Now we eat cake before heading over to the gift table where things get interesting.

First off, “WE GOT A BLENDER!!!” Savage freaks out as only he can as you would think he just got the WWF Title instead of a blender. Liz goes to open a present…..and there’s a cobra inside. She freaks out and Savage tries to pull her back, but Undertaker comes in and bashes him in the head with the urn. Jake Roberts comes in and holds the cobra in front of Liz’s face until Sid makes the save with a chair to end the show. This would set up Roberts vs. Savage in the feud of the year which resulted in Undertaker’s face turn.

Overall Rating: C-. This is an interesting show in that the first half is a much higher quality than the second half. The second half has all predictable matches where the winners were never in doubt, but that doesn’t exactly make it terrible. The show is definitely entertaining and set up a lot of stuff down the road while launching Bret Hart up to the next level. It’s worth a watch if you can find it in full but I wouldn’t expect to be blown away.

Ratings Comparison

British Bulldog/Ricky Steamboat/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Original: D

Redo: C+

Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: A+

Redo: A

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

Redo: D+

Big Bossman vs. The Mountie

Original: D

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. Nasty Boys

Original: D

Redo: D

Irwin R. Schyster vs. Greg Valentine

Original: D+

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan/Ultimate Warrior vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: C-

Dang this show ticked me off the first time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/25/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1991-a-wedding-that-goes-badly-what-a-new-concept/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

I knocked this out tonight instead of Thursday so we’ll see how this goes early instead of waiting for showtime.

Smackdown
Date: July 30, 2015
Location: BOK Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Jimmy Uso, Jerry Lawler, Tom Phillips

Smackdown has the potential to be interesting this week as we could get some more midcard build for Summerslam, which could be some of the more interesting stuff going on in WWE at the moment. The big story is likely to be Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens, which could be the match of the night at the pay per view. I don’t like that many could’s. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Seth Rollins to open things up. Seth: “SO WHAT?” Those are the words he’s heard so many times over the year. He heard them when he was the first person to cash in Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania and the man who stood toe to toe with Brock Lesnar at Battleground and came out with the title. This past Monday he reached his breaking point and the victim of his rage was John Cena, who went to the emergency room with a broken nose.

We see a clip of the knee that broke Cena’s nose and Rollins calls himself an artist, but here’s Cesaro to interrupt. Cesaro really doesn’t want to hear Rollins go on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about how great he thinks he is like he does every single week. See, Rollins is leaving out the part where Cena made him tap out. Rollins calls it a strategic move that he made because he has bigger things to worry about than the US Title. Cesaro says he’ll see Rollins later tonight, unless they both want to have their match right now.

Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

Non-title. Cesaro goes after the leg with some dragon screw leg whips to start but the threat of a Sharpshooter sends the champ bailing to the floor. Cue Kevin Owens to watch as we take a break. Back with Rollins holding a headlock and Owens’ head holding a headset for commentary. Cesaro double stomps Seth for two and catches a diving Rollins in midair. That’s not enough of a power display for Cesaro though so he throws Rollins up for a suplex. As I say every week, that man is scary strong.

Rollins is able to send him into the buckle with the release Downward Spiral and now it’s Seth with the European uppercuts for a change of pace. A chinlock doesn’t get Rollins very far as Cesaro powers out (I’m as shocked as you are) with a belly to back suplex. Cesaro loads up the Swing but Owens comes in for the DQ at 8:35.

Rating: C. This was fun while it lasted but it didn’t have enough time to go anywhere, especially with a good chunk of this match taking place in the commercial. Cesaro vs. Owens could be one heck of a brawl, especially if they let them have fifteen minutes or so. I mean, it’s a four hour show so there’s no reason every match shouldn’t have a lot of time right? Assuming there’s no lame musical guest so……yeah Cesaro vs. Owens is going to be lucky to get eight minutes right?

Owens lays out Cesaro and Rollins gets in a few shots of his own.

Los Matadores/Lucha Dragons vs. New Day/Ascension

Weren’t the two masked teams fighting on Monday? Before the match, New Day says the Lucha Dragons and Los Matadores could be #1 contenders, so if New Day wins tonight, they should be the #1 contenders! After some WAY over the top introductions, it’s Woods on the floor as Diego leg sweeps Viktor to start. A slingshot elbow from Diego sets up a slingshot hilo from Sin Cara, who starts working on the arm.

It’s off to Konnor for some hard kicks to the ribs before New Day breaks up a dive and sends Cara out to the floor. Well that sucks. Back from a break with Woods calling Cara stupid as the villains take turns stomping away in the corner. Viktor’s chinlock doesn’t work very well as the Players say they’d love to face the Usos. Big E. holds Cara for a running knee to the face (well mask) from Kofi as Woods is still going on.

Darren passes the time by wearing glasses and taking notes. That’s not something you often see but it makes sense. Viktor runs Cara over for two more as hear about Big E. making Young sick for some reason that Young doesn’t want to get into. A Crossface keeps Cara in trouble but he finally avoids a charge, allowing for the Kalisto. Everything breaks down and Kalisto kicks Big E. down, leaving Torito to hit a kind of 619 to knock Woods silly. Big E. loads up the Midnight Hour but Viktor takes Kofi’s tag, only to get rolled up by Kalisto for the pin at 10:10.

Rating: C+. Standard face in peril tag match here but I liked Woods on the floor and the Players on commentary. They’re setting up some decent stuff here with the division, but it says a lot that the NXT tag team division has equal depth with half the roster. I could see a big multi-team match at Summerslam, even though I’m really not a fan of them. Just give me a feud with a story.

Owens is told that the Authority has made Owens/Rollins vs. Cesaro/whomever he can find. Kevin isn’t pleased and is going to take it out on Cesaro’s partner.

Video on Becky Lynch, complete with some old school pictures of her in Japan with Natalya.

Luke Harper says Bray Wyatt saved him by showing him the truth so now Harper has everything he needs. Wyatt talks about Harper liking where he is now and deciding to stay. Anyone but you Roman.

Rusev comes out for his match but first up he and Summer have something to say…..about the fish thing from Raw. Lana ruined the hot Summer because she’s jealous and now Rusev would never fall for her again. After winning tonight, Rusev is going to take Summer and Dog Ziggler for a walk anywhere but Oklahoma. Maybe they’ll lay on a blanket, stare into each other’s eyes and….oh geez here we go again.

Rusev vs. Jack Swagger

SERIOUSLY??? Well to be fair we’re in Oklahoma and Swagger hasn’t lost to Rusev recently. Swagger starts with some AMERICAN armdrags to send Rusev outside as Tom makes the mistake of talking about their rivalry last year, because that’s so thrilling to hear about. Back in and Swagger wrestles him to the mat but Rusev just throws him into the corner and drives a knee into the face.

Rusev starts in on the back but since Swagger used to be something years ago, Rusev can’t just beat him in three minutes and shorten our agony. The slow stomping continues as the fans try to believe. So Oklahoma is the new center of delusion? Swagger comes back with some clotheslines and punches in the corner, only to have Rusev blast him in the face as we go to a break, because this feud just has to keep going. Back with Rusev holding a front facelock as the fans are already dying.

Swagger fights up and kicks Rusev’s ducked face but the Vader Bomb misses. Instead Jack plants him with a belly to belly and is promptly nailed with a spinwheel kick. The back and forth continues as Swagger goes after the leg to set up the Vader Bomb. Tom: “What is it going to take to put away Rusev?” A different opponent Tom. The superkick sets up the Accolade so Swagger can tap to Rusev at 14:40, because that’s the entirety of Swagger’s job description.

Rating: D. I know I wanted the old Rusev back but did we really need to see ANOTHER destruction of Jack Swagger? I know he isn’t ever going anywhere but good grief we get the point already. Find ANYONE else, even if it’s some rookie jobber, for Rusev to beat up every time you want to do Rusev vs. Swagger because it’s dead.

Post match Swagger pulls himself up and avoids a charge, followed by the Patriot Lock to Rusev for Oklahoma’s consolation prize.

Cesaro isn’t going to hunt for a partner because no one here owes him anything. He’s gotten here on his own (I’d try to forget the Heyman era too) and if he has to, he’ll fight on his own. I liked this but Cesaro can’t connect to me so maybe it’s a desire for nachos that I’m interpreting as caring about a wrestler.

We recap Neville vs. Stardust. It might not lead anywhere, but it’s certainly different.

Stardust vs. R-Truth

R-Truth has been using that theme song for over 12 years. When is it time that he gets started? He’s really bad about procrastinating. They run the ropes to start and we get a bit of an awkward pause as Truth has to hit a running fist to take over. Stardust gets in some shots, R-Truth gets in his kicks, Stardust sends him into the buckle and the Queen’s Crossbow (Cross Rhodes) is good for the pin at 2:01.

Stardust says Neville has failed this city (a line from Arrow) so here’s Neville to save Truth from further beating. Again, nothing great, but I’m kind of liking this.

Sheamus says he kicked Orton in the face on Monday for Orton showing him up at Battleground. He did it because he’s a real man, unlike Orton who just thinks he’s a real man. How many REAL MAN characters are there going these days? The idea of WWE without Orton is like Oklahoma without Tulsa: a dream come true. Hey, did you know that Vince hates Oklahoma?

Video on Undertaker vs. Lesnar. Brock is back on Monday.

Cesaro/??? vs. Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins

Cesaro is here alone until Dean Ambrose comes down as a surprise. It’s a big brawl before the bell with the good guys cleaning house twice in a row as we wait for the opening bell. We take a break and come back with the bell (THANK YOU!), meaning it’s Dean vs. Seth before Cesaro quickly comes in to keep the champ on the mat. Owens gets punched off the apron but the distraction lets Rollins gets in a shot to take over.

The bad guys take over with Owens firing off knees in the corner and it’s back to Rollins for a chinlock. Back to Owens for some right hands for two (seriously?) and a chinlock of his own. Rollins comes back in and misses the top rope knee to the head, allowing the hot tag to Dean. He backdrops Seth to the floor for a suicide dive. Dean’s superplex doesn’t work as well as Rollins counters into a buckle bomb for two. You wouldn’t expect a power move like that to work for someone like Rollins but he makes it look good.

The top rope knee to the head and low superkick get two more but Owens takes too much time going up and gets crotched for his efforts. You don’t try to superplex Kevin Owens though as he counters into the swinging superplex for another near fall as Cesaro dives in with a double stomp for the save. The backsplash misses too and it’s the real hot tag to Cesaro.

That kind of reverse Angle Slam sets up the Crossface on Owens but Rollins’ attempt at a save earns him a Swing. Cesaro clotheslines Owens outside, leaving Dean to stop Rollins from diving on the two of them. Instead Dean superplexes Rollins down, only to have Owens try the Pop Up Powerbomb. Dean is ready though and slips out, setting up a rollup from Cesaro for the pin on Kevin at 14:03.

Rating: B-. I had a better time with this than I was expecting as it felt like an old Coliseum Video exclusive where they took two random pairings and gave them time to have a fun match. It’s nice to see Cesaro getting a big win for a change, but I’m not sure where Owens goes if he loses at Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C. The main event and Rusev vs. Swagger mess cancel each other out so we’ll say the show was in the middle. I can easily live with Smackdown as a wrestling heavy show focusing on the midcard instead of the lame show it’s been for so long, though I have almost no faith in WWE to keep this up. Maybe they’ll start fixing things when Smackdown moves to USA in January, but I don’t have a reason to get my hopes up. Fun enough show this week if you ignore the really dull Rusev vs. Swagger mess.

Results

Cesaro b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered

Los Matadores/Lucha Dragons b. New Day/Ascension – Rollup to Viktor

Rusev b. Jack Swagger – Accolade

Stardust b. R-Truth – Queen’s Crossbow

Cesaro/Dean Ambrose b. Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins – Rollup to Owens

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 29, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

The big story coming out of last week is Matt Hardy earning the #1 contendership in a tables match over Bobby Roode. This was the result of the night’s main story being thrown out due to the Hernandez issue, which is likely going to cause even more problems tonight. Other than changing things up though, we do get Jeff Jarrett’s Hall of Fame induction. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s major events, including Jeff Jarrett being announced as the next Hall of Fame inductee, Serena being announced as James Storm’s partner and Matt Hardy becoming #1 contender.

Here’s Austin Aries with something to say. Aries may not have a title right now, but politics and backstage issues aside, there is no one on the face of this planet who is better than he is. Therefore, why wasn’t he involved in the #1 contenders match last week? Bully Ray may be in charge but he’s already off to a bad start with mistakes like that.

Cue Bully Ray, who says his opinion is the only one that matters. Sure Aries is great. He’s so great that he even beat Bully himself at one point. Aries is going to get another shot at what he deserves. Austin interprets that as a World Title shot but Ray says Aries already lost that chance. In that case, Aries will settle for a Tag Team Title shot with Bobby Roode. That’s a no as well, so Aries can challenge for the X-Division Title later tonight.

Aries isn’t happy because that title is beneath him. The X-Division Title is for people like Rockstar Spud, who comes out in objection. Spud is a big Aries fan, but a statement like he just made hurts. Option C gave people like Spud a chance to be World Heavyweight Champion because it gave them a reason to believe in themselves. Austin laughs this off because Option C was made for people like himself, not Rockstar Spud.

Yeah Angle beat him once, but that would only happen one out of ten times. Spud on the other hand would lost to him every time. Since Aries has nothing to do tonight, why doesn’t he beat Spud up instead? Spud thinks he can beat Aries instead of just hanging with him, which makes Aries say he’ll leave if he loses tonight. Ray accepts that as a contract and the match is on for later tonight. Aries agrees, but wants the Rockstar moniker if he wins.

The Jarretts are here.

Chris Melendez tells Kurt Angle that he has to beat Eric Young to move forward in his career.

Sgt. Chris Melendez vs. Eric Young

Angle is out with Chris. Before the match, Melendez says he’ll keep fighting no matter what, just like he did overseas. Young comes out and says Melendez doesn’t want him coming in there because it will end badly for him. The bell rings and Eric slaps him in the back of the head a few times as we’re suddenly told Aries vs. Spud is next week at No Surrender. Is there even a point to having specials when they’re the same shows we get every week? Young stays on him and drives some elbows into the back of the head before a quick piledriver is good for the pin 3:12. Well that was a waste of time.

Rating: D. TNA, I know Melendez is a cool story, but there is nothing interesting about him. He’s nothing special in the ring, he’s nothing special on the mic and his one legged gimmick is long past its expiration date. What is there about him that is supposed to interest me? Nothing to see here and I have a feeling it’s going to keep going.

Sting Hall of Fame video.

Matt Hardy doesn’t know what stipulation he’s picking for his title match against Ethan Carter III. “We will announce the stipulation later.” JB wants to know who the other half of we is, even though it was already announced next week.

Knockouts Title: Brooke vs. Marti Bell

Brooke is defending yeah this is just the token title defense against the former champion’s lackey. The champ cleans house to start but goes after Taryn (in a tutu), allowing Marti to get in a cheap shot to take over. Brooke comes back with a quick shot to the face for two, only to have a kick to the jaw change control back to Marti. A superplex is broken up though and Brooke nails a middle rope clothesline. Brooke gets two off a Russian legsweep but the Dollhouse tries to interfere, only to have Gail Kim…..play her entrance video for a distraction, allowing Brooke to hit the Butterface Maker on Marti to retain at 4:40.

Rating: D. I’m so sick of this division. They had something interesting in the Dollhouse but they take the title off Taryn for the sake of pushing Brooke, who is there for one thing and one thing only. Oh and we get Gail Kim being all serious because what else is she supposed to do? Lame match too.

Kurt Angle Hall of Fame video.

More from Tigre Uno in Tijuana, this time talking about what TNA has done for his family. He loves lucha libre and thinks it’s better than anything in the world. These aren’t exactly thrilling statements.

Tigre Uno calls Donald Trump a coward.

Ethan Carter III isn’t worried about what stipulation Matt picks.

Here are Carter and Tyrus for Matt’s announcement. Remember when World Title matches were just wrestling matches? After saying Bully sucks eggs, Carter rips on the Hardys for being a couple of North Carolina hillbillies. If this was against Jeff Hardy then maybe Ethan would be worried but Jeff broke his leg on a motocross bike. Ethan says Matt isn’t a World Title contender so here’s Jeff to object.

Jeff admits that he cried from the pain of his broken leg but he conquers fears. Before Carter knows it he’ll be dropping titanium shins on Ethan’s face. Before Carter knows it, Jeff will be the next World Champion. It’s nice to see Jeff admitting that his brother has no chance. This brings out Matt who draws a NEXT WORLD CHAMP chant.

Matt talks about the Hardys being told they can’t do it and always proving people wrong. It’s not a competition between the brothers to see who is best, which is why Jeff is supporting him this week. Jeff gets to make the announcement but instead of saying anything, he asks Matt to pull some stuff out from under the ring. Matt pulls out a table, a chair and a ladder because WHAT ELSE WOULD THE HARDYS PICK??? In case it’s not clear, next week is Full Metal Mayhem. On top of that, no one is allowed at ringside during the match. This took WAY too much time for the only possible conclusion.

Team 3D Hall of Fame video.

Magnus and Mickie James are ready for James Storm and Serena.

James Storm/Serena vs. Mickie James/Magnus

This is a result of Storm being a psycho who tried to get Mickie in the ring for one last match as a way to get inside her head and make her join the Revolution. The guys officially get things going with Magnus in control until Storm gets in a knee from the apron. Storm slaps on a chinlock and we take a break.

Back with Mickie chasing Serena around, only to allow Storm to plant Magnus with a Backstabber. Storm throws his sweat on Mickie and puts Magnus in a quickly broken chinlock. Magnus can’t get anything going though as he charges into Closing Time (Codebreaker) to keep him in trouble. Josh thinks it’s a gutbuster for reasons not entirely clear.

Both guys try cross bodies and it’s off to the girls with Mickie cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Storm goes after Mickie, only to get speared down for his efforts. Serena calls out Khoya, who hits Storm with the stick by mistake. Magnus adds a powerslam to Storm and the MickieDT ends Serena at 12:15.

Rating: D+. I don’t know if it’s been the boring show that led up to it but MY GOODNESS I did not care about this match. Serena could have been any warm body out there and she didn’t add much to the match. It doesn’t help that this feud basically ended a few weeks back but they dragged them out there one more time for the “blowoff”, which really didn’t do anything. Boring match which was mainly about the men while trying to be about the women.

Storm gets a MickieDT for good measure.

Mr. Anderson is worried about facing Bram because of the depths he’ll have to sink to.

Bram suggests Anderson kiss his kids goodnight and tell them goodbye because he isn’t going home.

We run down the No Surrender card.

Video on Jeff Jarrett’s career. I do get a good chuckle of TNA trying to make Jarrett seem like someone on Rock and Austin’s level, especially after they spent so much time ripping on him over the years.

Here’s Dixie Carter to induct Jarrett into the Hall of Fame. She tells a story of meeting Jeff when she lived in Tennessee and compares him to George Bailey from It’s A Wonderful Life. Dixie welcomes the Jarretts to the ring and after a break, it’s time to hear from Jeff. Jeff thanks everyone who has ever bought something from TNA and everyone who has ever worked for TNA. He leaves off people who have done work for them but haven’t actually gotten paid but I’m sure they’re included too.

Jeff lists off a bunch of production guys and office workers in what felt like something special. Mike Tenay gets thanked for holding things in place when they fell apart at times. “Don West not so much.” Then you have the X-Division, Knockouts and tag teams who all work so hard and prove that it can be more than just heavyweights main eventing. The heavyweights get a thank you as well, including AJ Styles.

Jarrett talks about a falling out with his dad (a legendary promoter in his own right) over this company but thanks him so much for getting him here. His children are the reason he’s here and even though they drive him crazy, they keep him going. Last but not least in family is Jeff’s wife Karen, who has been Jeff’s rock. A quick thank you to the fans leads to a THANK YOU JEFF chant and the roster (like 15 people) come out to applaud as the show ends. This was a nice ceremony and speech, but it felt really rushed because of the lack of time.

Overall Rating: F+. This was awful. With under twenty minutes combined of actual wrestling (if you count the commercial in the tag as ring time they crack it by less than ten seconds) and a bunch of last second building to a “special” that was announced tonight, what was the point of this show? To show that Jarrett is still a big deal? They did that already with all the packages and Slammiversary main event.

This show felt like it went on forever and built up nothing interesting. No Surrender feels like a show that is there to pop a rating, which TNA has kind of almost sort of done what, once or twice ever? I really didn’t care for this show and I didn’t want to sit through the rest of it, but that’s all we get these days in TNA. The wheels are falling off and the TV is getting worse and worse every single week. GFW getting here is supposed to be their saving grace, but TNA is barely worth saving at this point.

Results

Eric Young b. Sgt. Chris Melendez – Piledriver

Brooke b. Marti Belle – Butterface Maker

Mickie James/Magnus b. James Storm/Serena – MickieDT to Serena

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

NXT
Date: July 29, 2015
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We have a clear path towards Takeover: Brooklyn now with a main event of Finn Balor defending against Kevin Owens in a rematch from their Beast in the East showdown. Other than that it seems that we’re going to get Bayley challenging for the Women’s Title, but first she wants to get through Charlotte. However, Charlotte first wants to go through Dana Brooke, who she faces tonight. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady vs. Scott Dawson/Dash Wilder

Cass keeps it simple here, just saying that you’re S-A-W-F-T if you’re not a certified G. Enzo and Scott get things going with Enzo taking it to the mat and walking over Dawson’s back so he can do some dancing. Everything is about to break down when Dawson and Wilder realize that Cass is a foot taller than everyone else in the ring. Off to Cass, who seems to be a bit more over with the fans.

Back to Enzo for two on Wilder from a high cross body, only to charge shoulder first into the post. Wilder and Dawson start alternating as we get some NXT house show ads. The heels crank on the arm and Wilder stops Enzo from diving through the legs for a hot tag. A slingshot suplex (that’s so appropriate for a team like these two) gets two on Enzo but the bad guys collide, allowing for the hot tag to Big Cass. Everything breaks down and Enzo chases Wilder around the ring, only to be caught in a 3D into a Codebreaker (Shatter Machine) to give Wilder the pin at 6:39.

Rating: C. Well ok then. Unless they’re going to do a quick turn around and put Enzo and Cass in the title match in Brooklyn, I can’t imagine these two are going to be around NXT much longer. There’s not much left for them to do in NXT if they’re not going to win the titles, so let them go replace Santino on Raw.

Chad Gable and Jason Jordan say they’re not your common team but they get things done when they need to. They’re not as loud as the Hype Bros or Enzo/Cass, but they find a way to win. Jason doesn’t want to say they’re ready, willing and Gable.

We recap Charlotte vs. Dana Brooke, which is over Charlotte being in the Tap Out commercial, because Dana says Charlotte has been given all of her chances because of her last name. Dana wants a match to show her abilities and gets her chance tonight.

Baron Corbin vs. Jesse Sorensen

Yes that’s TNA’s Jesse Sorensen and he gets taken out by End of Days in 22 seconds.

Tyler Breeze comes in to Regal’s office and yells about Regal not answering his Twitter, Facebook or Instagram messages. Regal: “I sent a carrier pigeon.” Breeze will fight anyone from around the world but Regal says be careful what you wish for.

Jason Jordan/Chad Gable vs. Elias Samson/Levis Valenzuela Jr.

Jordan rides Levis down to start so it’s off to Samson (who looks like Damien Sandow and Wade Barrett’s lovechild) who wants Gable. Chad comes in and casually spins out of a wristlock before taking Samson down to the mat and cranking on the legs. Chad’s smile as he does this is great stuff. Back up and Levis gets in a knee to Gable’s back to take over before a slam gets two. Chad shrugs it off (because it’s just a slam) and makes the hot tag to Jason, who quickly puts on the double belly to back suplex (now called the Grand Amplitude) for the pin on Levis at 4:23.

Rating: D+. They’ve got something special here with Gable. The guy has that grin that is so cocky that you want to cheer him and see him get his face kicked in at the same time but can also get on the mat with anyone NXT has to offer. The finisher is great too and the pair have great chemistry together. Well done NXT as they develop more teams in a year than WWE has developed in the last ten years.

Dana Brooke is ready to conquer Charlotte, just like she’s conquered everything else she’s ever done. So she’s the female Brock Lesnar?

We recap Bull Dempsey’s struggles to stay in shape before seeing him trying to work out at the Performance Center. This goes badly, though some of it might have to do with his workout gear looking like it’s made of trash bags. The tagline is “It’s time to get Bull-Fit”, which is kind of catchy. There’s comedy potential here at least.

Charlotte vs. Dana Brooke

Charlotte shoves her down to start but has to go after Emma. The distraction doesn’t work for once but Dana is able to pound Charlotte down in the corner for two. It’s off to a bodyscissors on Charlotte until she lifts Dana up, only to have Brooke fall on top for two. Brooke cranks on an arm and a leg on the mat while shouting about Charlotte wanting to pose for Tap Out. A catapult sends Charlotte throat first into the bottom rope but she pops up with a neckbreaker and spear, followed by Natural Selection for the pin at 4:23.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match here as Charlotte shrugged off everything thrown at her and just beat Brooke up for the pin. Still though, that’s kind of the point as Charlotte is on to something bigger and better while Brooke is just kind of there at this point. Emma could still do something entertaining though and that’s all she needs to do, especially with so many of the NXT girls moving up to the main roster.

Samoa Joe is targeting Rhyno because they’re both predators. Joe is going to choke Rhyno out.

Last week, Regal was upset that Kevin Owens ran him over, but Owens comes up and apologizes for going into fight or flight mode. Regal can’t wait to see him take a beating.

Eva Marie says last week was just the beginning and she’s coming for Sasha Banks and the title. They really can’t be serious can right?

Kevin Owens vs. Martin Stone

Stone is a British wrestler who looks like a shorter Luke Gallows. Owens nails a clothesline to start and the backsplash. Stone runs into a release German suplex, followed by the Cannonball, a swanton bomb and the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin at 1:48. Total squash.

Owens gives Stone an apron powerbomb post match.

Video on Rhyno’s time in NXT.

Tag Team Titles: Blake/Murphy vs. Vaudevillains

Blake and Murphy are defending. Fans: “DOWN WITH DUBSTEP!” Blake and Gotch fight over a top wristlock to start until Simon grabs a monkey flip into a cross armbreaker, followed by a dropkick for two. English comes in and stays right on Blake with a top wristlock of his own. Murphy comes in but both champions take Japanese armdrags as this is all Vaudevillains so far.

Back from a break with the Vaudevillains working on Murphy’s arm some more. English throws both champs to the floor but Blake is able to kick him in the side of the head to finally take over. Running forearms in the corner set up a chinlock on Aiden but he fights up and dives over for a tag to Simon. Fans: “OH MY GOTCH!” Gotch cleans house and the Whirling Dervish is loaded up, only to have Bliss grad English’s leg, allowing Blake to roll him up and grab the tights to retain at 10:18.

Rating: C. This was a squash until the ending which seems to be there to set up a rematch in Brooklyn. The Vaudevillains are ready to take the titles as Blake and Murphy feel like a glorified transitional team and have since they won the belts. Bliss is the star of the team but they’re far from bad.

The Vaudevillains clean house until they’re alone with Bliss. Fans: “CHIVALRY! CHIVALRY!” They hold the ropes open for her but Bliss slaps both of them and leaves with the champs to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is one of the areas where NXT shines: they had a show here with almost no main event or top level story advancement, but they showcased their tag division with five regular teams, all of whom could be considered contenders for the titles (in addition to mentioning a sixth in the Hype Bros). On a one hour show, NXT has managed to build up a full tag division and made the title match feel like a big deal. It’s a great illustration of what you can do when you treat things like they matter. Well done here on a show that got to brag about the hard work they’ve put in to get here.

Results

Scott Dawson/Dash Wilder b. Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady – Shatter Machine to Amore

Baron Corbin b. Jesse Sorensen – End of Days

Jason Jordan/Chad Gable b. Levis Valenzuela Jr./Elias Samson – Grand Amplitude to Valenzuela

Charlotte b. Dana Brooke – Natural Selection

Kevin Owens b. Martin Stone – Pop Up Powerbomb

Blake/Murphy b. Vaudevillains – Rollup to English with a handful of tights

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

http://www.wwe.com/inside/layla-retires-from-wwe-27726062

 

Does it count as news when you haven’t done anything in months if not years?  She’s from that model era of wrestling where the Divas were mostly worthless in the ring and Layla was really just the bubbly one who looked good in small outfits.  There were FAR worse Divas out there and Layla reached a point where she wasn’t too bad.  I’ll give her this too: I saw her at a house show in person and my goodness the cameras don’t do her justice.  She was stunning.