Monday Nitro – April 26, 1999: I Guess They Could Be This Crazy

Monday Nitro #186
Date: April 26, 1999
Location: Fargodome, Fargo, North Dakota
Attendance: 11,482
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone

Things are shaking up with less than two weeks to go before Slamboree. The two people in the upcoming World Title match have flipped sides and allegedly Flair has flipped his lid, even though he really hasn’t done much to back that up. I have a bad feeling about some of the stuff we’re going to have to sit through tonight. Let’s get to it.

In Memory of Rick Rude, which they actually spell using his real name.

We open with a recap of the major points of last week’s show with a focus on the Piper/Flair stuff and the ending with what I guess you would call a double turn.

Now we’re at the mental hospital and this can’t end well. A doctor and nurse have the most painfully scripted conversation you can imagine, talking about how Flair is treating this place like a hotel. The nurse tells the patients that there will be no Nitro tonight when Flair’s music comes on. He struts in wearing his robe and University of Florida boxers, talking about how this is his hotel. Flair watches the TV, meaning he’s watching himself in theory. He dances with the nurse who eventually walks away disgusted. I can’t say I disagree.

Opening sequence.

JJ Dillon is with Charles Robinson and says that Robinson is Vice President of WCW. Since Flair is out of action, Robinson is in charge and above the Commissioner. This is going to be a LONG night.

Nitro Girls.

Tenay is filling in for a sick Heenan. He and Tony are fine after weeks of bickering before the announce teams were split.

Here’s Piper to get things going in the arena. Piper thinks he’s in charge now with Flair gone so Randy Savage is reinstated and getting a US Title shot tonight. He mentions Page which brings out the champion to a loud chorus of boos. Piper wants Page to defend against Sting tonight but Page doesn’t seem to thrilled with the idea. Roddy goes to leave and then makes the match for 9pm sharp.

DJ Ran.

Konnan vs. Brian Adams

This is fallout from the Black and White attacking Konnan last week. After some catchphrases, Konnan quickly takes Adams into the corner for ten punches, only to get caught by an atomic drop and clothesline. An elbow to the back of the head has Konnan in trouble and a gorilla press gutbuster gets two. We hit a bad looking reverse chinlock on Konnan. Dude at least crank on it or flex a bit. Adams crotches himself while trying to jump on Konnan’s back but stops the comeback with a powerslam. Konnan comes right back with the usual and hooks the Sunrise but the NWO runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D-. What else were you expecting from something like this? Neither guy was exactly a ring general and the moves they were using ranged from sloppy to just bad looking. I guess the Black and White was trying to prove a point but this was a rather dull way to go about it.

Video on Sting.

The announcers talk about Page vs. Sting.

The Horsemen have attacked Kidman and Saturn, making the next match a handicap match.

Scott Armstrong/Steve Armstrong vs. Raven

After ranting about fat women in operas, Raven quickly escapes a double team attempt in the corner and bulldogs the brothers down. It’s already chair time with both Armstrongs taking the drop toehold onto the steel. Steve finally gets in a shot on Raven but winds up hitting his brother a few seconds later. Both guys take ten right hands in the corner but Scott finally nails a superkick to get a breather. The breather is short lived though as his second superkick hits his brother, allowing Raven to DDT Scott for two. Scott pops up and nails Raven with the chair though and actually gets the upset pin.

Rating: D+. This was short and energetic, but was there any real need to have Raven lose here? The Armstrongs are about as low level of a tag team as you can have in this company but they get a pin over a guy getting a title shot in a few weeks? This is more of the odd booking this company has been using lately.

Raven beats up the Armstrongs again post match, making the booking even more head scratching.

Flair calls Robinson to yell about Piper having power. He wants the National Guard called in to deal with this and yells at other patients to stop touching his robe. Flair hangs up and walks off with a very muscular nurse.

We look at the same package that opened the show.

Gene brings out Charles Robinson for a chat. He says that Piper has no authority here but we’ll still get Sting vs. Page tonight. This brings out Piper to call him a leprechaun, causing Robinson to slap him in the face. Security comes down to arrest Piper and Robinson fires him for good measure. The match with Flair is still on at Slamboree of course.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sting

Page is defending. Sting is wearing white wraps on his feet and a necklace of all things. The champion is quickly shoved down to start but he comes back with a big right hand. Sting easily wins a slugout and knocks Page back to the floor for a breather. Back in and Page drives in the shoulders but Sting sends him outside again. This time Sting goes after him and rams Page face first into the announcers’ table.

Back in and the Stinger Splash connects but Page makes the ropes to avoid the Scorpion. Page bails again and gets some water before heading back inside where Sting hammers away. The champ slows things down with a hammerlock and a big clothesline. They head outside and up the aisle with Sting dropping him throat first across the barricade. A slam in the aisle has Page in trouble but the referee reminds Sting that he can only win the title in the ring.

Sting takes him back inside for some right hands in the corner but a low blow and hot shot stops Sting cold. A belly to back suplex drops Sting again but he comes back with the shoulder block and falling low blow. Page is up first though and rakes the paint off Sting’s face. Some slaps fire Sting up again but Page grabs a swinging neckbreaker for two. The champ hits a low blow of his own and chokes away in the corner.

Page wraps the knee around the post but Sting kicks him into the barricade. Now things speed up with Sting’s shots to the face and bulldog followed by the top rope splash for two. They head outside again with Sting being sent into the barricade. Page grabs something like a Diamond Cutter across the top rope but Sting comes back with ten face rams into the buckle and the last one onto the mat.

A sitout powerbomb gets two for the champion and a big lariat drops Sting again. Back up and Sting grabs a piledriver but kneels down like a tombstone for two. Now he tries a regular tombstone and finally plants him for a VERY close two. The fans are totally behind Sting here. Page comes back with a jumping floatover DDT for two more but Sting blocks the Diamond Cutter out of the corner and grabs the Death Drop for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. This took awhile to get going but the last few minutes of this were awesome. As is almost always the case, there’s no substitute for a long, good match and that’s what we got here. This is actually a bit ahead of the Goldberg match for Page which is quite the accomplishment. Really good stuff here and the best main event style match WCW has had in forever. Also, how nice was it to not have any commercials in this?

More Flair yelling at Robinson with Ric telling him to make Sting vs. Goldberg for Slamboree. One of the inmates is now called AAA.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Psychosis

Psychosis is defending for a change. The champ grabs a headlock to start and takes Rey down to the mat, only to miss a Stinger Splash in the corner. Psychosis counters a headscissors by dropping Rey throat first across the top rope. He lifts Rey up for a powerbomb and drops his face onto the top turnbuckle in a vicious looking crash. A reversal suplex drops Rey over the top rope again and a dropkick sends him to the apron.

Psychosis charges at him but they both fall to the floor with Rey taking over for the first time. Rey’s superplex is countered into something like a falcon’s arrow. The Horsemen come out to grab the Tag Team Titles but Rey dives on both of them. Psychosis gets in a cheap shot to take over but Rey comes back with a tornado DDT out of nowhere for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. What in the world was the point of this? Rey is now a five time Cruiserweight Champion and Psychosis’ seven days as champion is the only break from Mysterio, Kidman and Guerrera as champion since August. It’s ok to let someone else in there for a change and I don’t see why Psychosis had to lose the belt this fast. Let him beat a few low level guys to give the division a chance to breathe a bit.

The Horsemen destroy Rey post match.

Nash comes out and says he’s been told his title shot at Slamboree has been turned into Goldberg vs. Sting. That’s not cool with him but he’d like a four way tonight with Page, Goldberg and Sting, winner takes all.

Flair calls Robinson and says make the four way. He hits on the nurse a bit more and they try some amateur wrestling stuff until the nurse from earlier comes up to glare at them.

Erik Watts vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Please make it quick. Thankfully there aren’t any weapons in sight for this one. Bigelow misses a charge in the corner and gets caught in a springboard bulldog. Erik tries a hurricanrana but winds up backdropping Bigelow instead. It’s somehow worse than it sounds. Bigelow pops up with a big clothesline followed by the Swan Dive and Greetings From Asbury Park for the pin. At least it was short.

Sting comes out sans belt but with fresh paint. He’s up for a four way tonight.

TV Title: Booker T. vs. Meng

Booker is defending. A hard shoulder puts the champ down but he comes back with a forearm and dropkick. Booker shrugs off some forearms and slams Meng a few times, only to walk into a powerslam for two. That gets Meng nowhere as Booker nails his pair of kicks but the side kick sends Meng into the referee. This brings out Stevie Ray as the ax kick takes out Meng. Booker crotches himself on the ropes after missing another kick. There’s the Tongan Death Grip but Stevie nails Meng with the slap jack, giving Booker the pin.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have enough time to go anywhere but Meng was just there to give Booker someone to beat up to retain the title. The Stevie Ray and Booker T stuff needs to go away. The team is done and Booker is on his way to becoming something big in the singles division. Stevie is just kind of dragging Booker down at this point and that’s not good.

Post match Rick Steiner of all people comes out and beats on Stevie until Booker pulls him off. Booker and Steiner yell at each other, likely setting up Booker’s next challenger.

Video on Nash.

We get a special look at Hogan’s knee surgery. Bischoff had to talk him into getting it done because Hogan wants to beat up Page.

Video on Goldberg.

Back to the hospital where Flair tells Robinson to make Steiner vs. Booker T. for Slamboree and make the main event tonight No DQ. Flair teaches some patient to dance….and here’s Scott Hall in patient clothes to throw a toothpick at Ric. Naturally, no one talks about this or ever brings it up again.

Brian Knobbs vs. Hardcore Hak vs. Horace vs. Mikey Whipwreck

This is hardcore and the winner of this gets Bigelow at the PPV. Everyone has a kendo stick and Hak stays on the floor to start. He finally gets in and all three guys beat him down with the sticks. Knobbs brings in a ladder to splash onto Hak for two. We actually take a break in this match and come back to see Horace hitting Knobbs with a Surge barrel.

Brian nails Hak with a ladder but Hak knocks him to the floor. A table is set up on the floor but Knobbs uses the weapons cart on Hak. Back in the ring and Horace kicks Mikey in the face as Knobbs chairs Hak. Mikey drops a leg onto a chair onto Brian’s head as the table has been bridged between the apron and barricade.

The Surge container comes back in and Hak slides in another table. Horace beats on Hak with the weightlifting belt on the floor as Chastity sprays someone with the fire extinguisher. Hak dives over the top but only hits table but pops right up to nail Knobbs with a stick. Not that it matters as Knobbs sends Hak to the floor and drops the ladder on Mikey for the pin.

Rating: F. When half of the people in your match have jobs because of Hulk Hogan, you can tell it’s not going to be much to see. This was the usual hardcore mess with nothing interesting save for some product placement from Surge. These are getting less and less interesting and it’s going to get even worse in the future.

US Title: Randy Savage vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is defending and has something to say before the match. He doesn’t like a lot of what Piper does but he does like this match with Savage. Randy comes out with an unnamed woman in a gown wearing a sash like a beauty pageant contestant. Steiner wants one more stipulation though: if he wins, he gets to spend some time with George. Robinson is refereeing in most of a suit. They circle each other and do a lot of pointing for a minute or so before finally locking up. Steiner shoves him into Robinson….and that’s a DQ.

Post match the three girls strip Robinson down to his University of Florida boxers, just like Flair.

Video on George training. This is exactly what you would expect.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Diamond Dallas Page vs. Goldberg vs. Kevin Nash

Sting is defending after having won the title earlier tonight. The match begins after a break with Page off in the crowd, leaving Goldberg and Sting to beat on Nash in the corner. Now it’s Goldberg getting double teamed before the champion has to fight off both monsters. Goldberg suplexes Nash but Sting breaks up the cover. Page is back at ringside as Goldberg has knocked both guys down. A powerslam drops Sting for two as Page still hasn’t come in.

Goldberg loads up the spear but Page breaks it up from the apron and comes in with a neckbreaker for two. Nash DIVES to break up the pin and thankfully there isn’t a quad laying on the mat as a result. Sting gets jumped from behind by Nash but comes back with right hands to the jaw. Goldberg and Page are both down until Page goes to the corner, earning himself a Stinger Splash. The other two get Splashes of their own and Sting is the only man standing.

Nash pops back to his feet and cleans house by booting them all in the face. Goldberg breaks up a Jackknife on Page before choking Page on the mat. He sends Page to the floor but gets taken down by Sting. The champ hammers away on Nash in the corner until Page comes back in with a low blow for the save. Now it’s Goldberg slamming Page but taking a Stinger Splash. Nash keeps trying to steal pins in a smart move.

There’s a side slam to Sting for two and Goldberg superkicks Page down to give Nash the same. Goldberg dives at Page but rams his head into Page’s knee to scramble his brains. Nash chokes Sting in the corner but misses a big boot. He gets caught in the Scorpion but Sting lets go, only to get speared down by Goldberg. The Jackhammer plants Sting but Savage breaks it up for no apparent reason. Savage throws Page some knuckles to knock Nash out before a Diamond Cutter (Nash turned to the side so it was half Cutter and half neckbreaker) gives Page the belt back.

Rating: C+. Dang it’s a good thing Savage joined up with Page. We almost had more than two top good guys in the whole company (I don’t think Piper counts when seemingly no one can stand him). This was energetic with Nash doing more work than I’ve seen him do in years. Page winning the title back is odd but it’s pretty tame given some of the stuff WCW has done in recent weeks.

Page runs through the crowd to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Much like last week, the wrestling is more than good enough to make this a watchable show. However, the stories are so out there that they drags things back down. Basically we’re right back where we were when Nitro came on the air last week, other than Flair being in a mental hospital with Scott Hall. Mysterio has the title back, Page is still champion, and we’re still looking at Page vs. Nash for the title at Slamboree.

That’s why these title changes make me shake my head at WCW. They had an idea that could have drawn a good rating with Page vs. Sting and it makes sense to put it on right when Raw starts. What doesn’t make sense is giving that match about fifty minutes of build. That could have easily headlined a big PPV but instead they decided to give it less than an hour?

If that’s not enough, we have a big gimmick match for the title which also could have headlined a PPV, so it gets about ninety minutes of build and most people probably didn’t hear about it. This impatience is maddening when you could build this stuff up for weeks instead of minutes. They’re pouring away what could be millions of dollars in PPV money for the sake of maybe beating Raw for one night. The fact that this show had a bigger gap than the week before or the week after should have been a hint but WCW never seemed to learn.

Let’s go back to something mentioned earlier: Ric Flair is currently in a mental hospital and happened to run into Scott Hall. Nothing is mentioned of this again, Scott didn’t say a word, and I highly doubt we’ll see Scott again for several months. That’s not something you should be able to just see and walk past, but WCW apparently doesn’t feel the need to address this and thinks we’ll just kind of go along with it. It comes off like a joke and that’s not the kind of thing you should be seeing on national TV in a segment that is stupid already.

Overall this was a good show, but the stupid stuff is REALLY stupid and drags down the rest of the show. This also needs to be an hour less which is standard for almost all wrestling shows. They just do not need to be three hours and the extra hour always hurts things. You make this two hours and have Flair at the arena in a suit instead of being in a hospital and the show is about twice as good.

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Wrestler of the Day – September 14: Maven

Today we have Eyebrows Huffman himself: Maven.

Maven of course won the first Tough Enough competition and entered the 2002 Royal Rumble where he eliminated the Undertaker in a shocker. Undertaker wanted revenge and would put his Hardcore Title on the line on Smackdown, February 7, 2002.

Hardcore Title: Maven vs. Undertaker

Al Snow is in Maven’s corner and looks like he’s heading to a funeral. He slides Maven a trashcan lid for some shots but they just tick Undertaker off even more. The beating begins but Undertaker misses an elbow drop. Not that it matters as he punches a trashcan into Maven’s face. Snow pulls Maven to the floor but Undertaker is fine with hurting him out there as well.

A huge trashcan shot to the head crushes Maven back inside and Snow is thrown over the barricade. Maven is busted open but Snow comes back in with the ring bell. This goes as well as you would expect it to as a big boot drops Snow and Maven gets chokeslammed for two as Undertaker picks him up. There’s a dragon sleeper on Maven but the Rock runs in with a chair. A hard shot to the head and a Rock Bottom give Maven the title in a huge upset.

Rating: D+. This was more of an angle than a match and there’s nothing wrong with that. They had to get the Hardcore Title off Undertaker somehow and using it to further Undertaker vs. Rock is as good a way as any. Maven getting another one over on Undertaker is a good thing too as he gets a huge rub and looks like a much bigger deal than he would have otherwise.

Maven would defend the title at Wrestlemania X8.

Hardcore Title: Goldust vs. Maven

Maven is defending and this is another match with no real story to it. Goldie jumps him during the entrance to take over quickly. A forearm off the railing keeps Maven down and it’s cookie sheet time. We head inside with Maven avoiding a catapult and hitting a kind of Van Daminator with a trashcan and dropkick for two. Goldie neckbreakers him down for two and busts out a shovel. Instead of using it though he whips Maven into the trashcan for two. Goldust puts Maven down with a shot to the head….and here’s Spike Dudley running in for the pin and the title. We’ve got a running joke tonight and I’m not rating this nonsense.

Maven would get a Tag Team Title shot at Backlash 2002.

Tag Titles: Billy/Chuck vs. Maven/Al Snow

Snow and Maven clear the ring to start and Snow puts on a headband. Maven and Chuck officially get us going but it’s off to Billy very fast. Billy and Chuck are champions in case you’re really new at this. Maven comes back with a DDT but can’t make the tag. Snow is like screw it and runs in to beat on Billy. Off to Snow who cleans a house which wasn’t that dirty in the first place.

Snow gets taken down by Chuck and the beating begins. Swinging neckbreaker gets two for Billy. The fans tell Rico that he’s gay. Billy misses a corner splash and it’s hot tag to Maven. He hits the one move he was good at, the dropkick, to send Billy to the floor. Snow gets caught by a superkick but Rico accidentally kicks Chuck’s head off. Top rope cross body gets two for Maven. Snow has to chase Rico so Chuck kicks Maven’s head off to retain.

Rating: D. Not much here but it was happening to bridge the two main events which was fine. Billy and Chuck would crank up the overtones soon enough while Maven and Snow wouldn’t go anywhere as a team, or alone for that matter. There isn’t much to say about this match because it was only there to fill in time, which is understandable. More Rico would have helped.

Things would settle down after this and Maven would get back to singles action on Smackdown, May 30, 2002.

Christian vs. Maven

Christian stomps away during Maven’s entrance but Maven throws him to the floor for a plancha. Back in and Christian hits the reverse DDT backbreaker. His superplex is blocked though and a middle rope bulldog gets two. Maven goes up top but gets kicked in the head by an interfering Tajiri (Maven had been hitting on Tajiri’s girlfriend Torrie), setting up the Unprettier for the pin.

Maven would miss most of the rest of the year but returned in early 2003, including this match on Raw, January 13, 2003.

Maven/Test vs. D’Lo Brown/Christopher Nowitski

Test gets double teamed to start until Chris gets to pound on him a bit. Again Test gets double teamed but has a bit better success this time and brings in Maven who winds up getting caught in a spinebuster by Nowitski. Brown gets two off a flapjack and it’s back to Nowitski. Maven gets beaten down even more as this is going NOWHERE. Cold tag brings in Test and house is cleaned but Chris saves Brown from a pumphandle powerslam. The big boot misses Brown and sends Test to the floor before Maven walks into the Sky High. He isn’t legal though so Test comes in and kicks Brown’s head off for the pin.

Rating: F+. Stacy looked great in the dress and that’s the extent of anything positive about this match. Other than that, there was NOTHING going on here at all with four guys that no one cared about having a boring match. That basically sums up Raw in a single sentence: a bunch of boring matches that no one cares about.

Another Raw match on February 3, 2003.

Maven vs. D’Lo Brown

They trade hiptoss attempts until Maven armdrags him down. We hit the mat with Maven holding a headlock as the fans are bored already. Brown comes back with a kneelift and sends Maven into the buckle as the booing continues. Maven hits what looked to be a spin kick and a backslide for two and a middle rope bulldog gets the same. Maven misses a missile dropkick and the Sky High powerbomb is good for the pin.

Rating: D-. This match exists. Next.

We’ll jump ahead to Sunday Night Heat at some point in June 2003.

Maven vs. Mike Knox

Knox shoves him into the corner to start but gets caught in an armbar. Off to a hammerlock as commentator Al Snow is very proud of his student. A dropkick stops Mike’s comeback and we hit another armbar. Knox sends him into the buckle and gets two off a neckbreaker, only to miss a middle rope elbow. A nice spinwheel kick gets two for Maven and he nails a middle rope bulldog. Maven heads up top for a missile dropkick and the pin.

Rating: D. Maven gets less impressive every time I watch him. There’s just nothing to him and he never has anything worth watching. To be fair though he was a glorified rookie at this point who didn’t have enough experience to do anything significant in the ring. Nothing to see here and Knox was just a jobber.

Time for comedy on Raw, June 30, 2003.

Maven vs. Rico

This is when Rico was as over the top as ever. Rico rubs the back of Maven’s trunks to start before rolling around in a circle. He reaches down his own tights and pulls out a hotel key as this is getting old already. Maven tries a sunset flip but Rico sits on his face for two. A side headlock has Maven in trouble and Rico kisses him on the cheek. Rico dances a bit and his chick Miss Jackie trips Maven up, allowing Rico to fire off some kicks for two. Maven comes back with a series of clotheslines and the required atomic drop. Jackie saves Rico after a middle rope bulldog, allowing Rico to hit a spinwheel kick for the pin.

Rating: D-. I really don’t like comedy matches like this as it’s as over the top as you can get and clearly there for the lowest common denominator. This felt like filler as this isn’t leading anywhere and was designed to make fans feel uncomfortable with Rico being so over the top.

Here’s a match that might surprise you. From Heat on July 13, 2003.

HHH vs. Maven

Non-title and HHH is in the rare blue trunks. HHH grabs a cross face chickenwing of all things to get started, sending Maven running for the ropes. A snapmare puts Maven down and HHH pats his jaw a bit. Maven comes back with some dropkicks to knock HHH out to the floor and the Game is annoyed. Back in and HHH throws him hard to the floor but Maven sends him face first into the steps.

We take a break and come back with Maven grabbing a swinging neckbreaker to put both guys down. Trips stomps away in the corner and a spinebuster gets two. There’s the knee drop for the same but Maven comes back with a forearm to the face. Maven nails a spinwheel kick for two more but HHH sends him out to the floor.

Like the real hero he is, Maven nails him in the face with the title belt for two, only to walk into a sleeper. Maven counters into one of his own and the arm goes down three times but HHH gets a boot on the ropes. Trips sends the referee into the ropes to crotch Maven but Eyebrows comes back with a middle rope bulldog for a close near fall. Not that it matters as HHH grabs a quick Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: D+. The problem here was there was no reason to buy into Maven’s near falls. At the end of the day, it’s Maven against the World Champion on the C show. This is like the old days where Flair would have one off matches against no names and try to make them feel like something important but it didn’t quite work here. Maven was trying though and the match could have been much worse.

More Evolution on Raw, August 25, 2003.

Maven vs. Randy Orton

Shawn Michaels comes out with Maven to counteract Flair. Feeling out process to start with Maven taking him to the mat but getting caught in the backbreaker for two. Some right hands have Maven in trouble and the old guys get on the apron to do nothing. The referee only goes after Shawn of course and Flair gets in a cheap shot. Shawn superkicks Ric down but Orton stays on Maven like the rookie he is. The RKO is countered and Maven nails a spinwheel kick followed by a high cross body for two. Orton sidesteps a charge and hits the RKO but pulls Maven up at two. Instead Orton hits Sweet Chin Music for the pin.

Rating: D. The Maven issues continue as he just isn’t hitting the next level. He’s certainly not bad and most of his stuff works, but it’s just so many notches below the people he’s in there with. Granted that’s far more the WWE’s fault as he’s been wrestling for about two years, which is nowhere near long enough to be on national TV.

Maven wouldn’t do much of anything for over a year, so let’s put him in the main event of the 2004 Survivor Series.

Team HHH vs. Team Orton

HHH, Edge, Batista, Gene Snitsky

Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Maven

HHH is world champion. Maven isn’t here due to the earlier attack. It’s interesting to think that it would be Batista rather than Orton that would rise up out of this match as the real star. Not that Orton isn’t a star, but Batista was without a doubt the biggest star in the company in 2005 and part of 2006. For some reason Edge comes out last. Benoit vs. Edge to start which is fine with me. Benoit destroys Edge and knocks him to the floor to start but it’s off to Orton vs. Snitsky.

Orton pounds him down with ease before it’s Jericho in off the tag. HHH comes in but Jericho immediately elbows him down and brings in Orton to no response. Orton can’t challenge for the world title because of some stipulation due to losing to Flair. Great way to make sure the fans get behind him there right? Make it clear that no matter how awesome he is, he’s not getting the title shot.

Batista comes in and has some better luck with Randy, firing off shoulders into the corner. Edge is in now and he mocks Orton’s pose in an often done bit. Edge draws in Jericho for no apparent reason, but it allows Orton to clothesline Edge back down. Off to Benoit as the fans are dead for this match for some reason. Benoit cleans house and suplexes everyone in sight. Edge prevents a Swan Dive onto HHH, so HHH suplexes Edge onto HHH and Swan Dives both of them for two.

Everything breaks down even more and HHH gets caught in the Sharpshooter by Benoit. Snitsky makes the save and Edge gets put in the Crossface. This time Batista saves, allowing HHH to Pedigree Benoit and give Edge the pin for the elimination. Jericho comes in to pound away on Edge but HHH and Snitsky get in an argument. Batista comes to HHH’s defense but has to break up the Walls on HHH instead.

Flair trips up Jericho and gets ejected for his efforts. Flair walks up the aisle but comes back a second later to allow Batista to kill Orton and Jericho. There’s the spinebuster to Jericho but Orton hits Big Dave with the belt, allowing Jericho to hit the enziguri on Batista for the pin. Jericho hits the springboard dropkick to knock Snitsky onto HHH on the floor but Batista kills Jericho with the clothesline before leaving.

It’s Snitsky vs. Jericho at the moment with Snitsky choking away. Edge comes in and pounds on his fellow Canadian but gets caught in the sleeper drop to put both guys down. Orton gets shoved to the floor and Edge and HHH double team him for a bit. Jericho DDTs Snitsky down….and here comes Maven. He goes right after Snitsky and takes him down with a forearm as things seem to go into slow motion.

Maven bulldogs HHH down and is all fired up, but Snitsky kills him with a chair shot for a DQ. HHH covers the dead Maven for the easy elimination. Edge keeps covering Jericho but can’t get more than a bunch of two’s. It’s Orton/Jericho vs. HHH/Edge if you’re keeping score. A spear puts Jericho out and it’s 2-1 with Orton in trouble. Orton says bring it on and is promptly beaten down in the corner.

Edge suplexes Orton down and holds him while HHH pounds away. Orton punches away at HHH but gets DDT’d down for two. Edge comes back in and gets slammed down before getting dropkicked into HHH on the apron. That gets two off a rollup from Orton but he walks into a HHH spinebuster. We get the required heel miscommunication as Edge spears HHH down and walks into an RKO for the pin. It’s down to Orton vs. HHH with the Game hitting Orton low as Edge leaves. The Pedigree is countered into the RKO for the final pin.

Rating: B. The match was good stuff but as I said earlier, Orton pinning HHH doesn’t mean anything. Somehow Orton would get a title match at the Rumble through means I don’t remember where HHH would destroy Orton once and for all. I think I’m the only person on the planet that liked Orton’s first main event face run so when I watched this I was digging it at the time. It turned out they got lucky with Batista, but the Orton face run could have been more if HHH hadn’t hacked the legs out from under it.

As a result, Maven got to be GM of Raw the next night and of course gave himself a World Title shot.

Raw World Title: Maven vs. HHH

HHH offers the bandaged Maven a way out of this but Eyebrows wants the match. Benoit and Jericho come out to offer some support and counteract Flair and Batista. Maven hammers away to start and gets two off a dropkick before grabbing a headlock. A Flair distraction lets Batista get in a cheap shot but the referee tosses him out. Flair protests and is gone as well, leaving us one on one, assuming you don’t count the Canadians at ringside.

HHH nails the running knee and the spinning spinebuster for two before hooking an abdominal stretch. Benoit yells at HHH and gets Maven a breather but HHH stays on the glorified jobber. Now Jericho offers a distraction, allowing Benoit to send HHH into the steps. Jericho gets in a cheap shot as well and Maven has an advantage….only to get caught in the facebuster.

Benoit trips Trips and Maven nails a spinwheel kick for two. A high cross body misses but Jericho comes in with the bulldog and Lionsault. That’s only good for two because Maven is just that pathetic. The Pedigree connects but Jericho puts Maven’s foot on the ropes. The referee finally ejects him but the distraction lets Benoit hit a release German suplex and the Swan Dive to give Maven another two.

Edge comes in and spears the referee by mistake so Jericho and Benoit come in to beat him down. Now Batista comes in and cleans out the Canadians but Orton runs in to nail HHH with the belt. Flair pulls the referee out at two so Randy beats on Ric. Now Snitsky comes out to beat up Orton and kick Maven’s head off, setting up the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C. This worked for a totally different reason than it should have. I was cracking up watching three former World Champions trying to make Maven a threat to HHH but it just wasn’t going to happen. It turned into a cartoon at the end and believe it or not I was having a great time with it, even though Maven had as much chance of winning the title here as the bottle of water next to me.

Reality would set in and Maven would turn heel to no reaction. Here he is at New Year’s Revolution 2005.


Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Maven

No backstory here at all as it’s more or less just a random title match. This was more or less the last ditch effort to make Maven mean a thing. Amazingly enough it didn’t work at all. Shelton is WAY over here as this was right before the hottest period of his career and four months before the match with Shawn that made him the hottest thing on the planet and is still his career highlight.

The heat on Maven is excellent. He cuts a promo in the middle of the match, saying that he doesn’t know how many people here speak English. He’s getting some very decent heat here. I’m almost impressed. He throws in a little Spanish, telling the fans to shut their mouths. This is a fine idea but this has gone on five minutes.

And now he’s leaving. He changes his mind at 9 and turns back to the ring. Literally 5 seconds after he gets in he gets rolled up for a pin. He gets on the mic and says he wants another match because that didn’t count. Shelton comes in, the bell rings, he hits the Exploder Suplex and it’s over in 5 seconds.

Rating: N/A. WHAT WAS THE FREAKING POINT OF THIS??? Literally this was ten minutes that just made no sense at all and there were two “matches”. What in the world was going on here? I flat out do not get this, but if it was an actual match it would fail and fail hard.

One more Evolution match. From Raw on February 7, 2005.

Maven vs. Batista

Maven is a cocky heel at this point and doesn’t get an entrance. What do you think is going to happen here? He’s mad he wasn’t in the Rumble and calls conspiracy. Cue Big Dave and this is exactly what you would expect. The run time is 32 seconds if you’re curious. These fans are losing their minds over a total squash. He really needs I Walk Alone which he would get soon after winning the title.

We’ll wrap it up with Maven as Simon Dean’s protege on Heat, April 17, 2005.

Maven/Simon Dean vs. Russell Simpson/CM Punk

Lillian doesn’t know Simpson’s name. Simpson armdrags Maven down to start and gets caught in an armbar. It’s quickly off to Punk for some kicks to the arm as Coach thinks the team is called CM Punk. Maven takes him to the ropes and chokes a bit before it’s off to Dean for a floatover suplex and two. Back to Maven who misses a dropkick, allowing the tag off to Simpson. A double spinebuster is enough for the pin on Russell.

Rating: D+. It’s always fun to see someone like this before they became a big deal, even though no one seemed to know his name. The match wasn’t anything of note but what else are you expecting from a three minute match on Heat? Simpson never went anywhere as far as I can tell.

At the end of the day, Maven just didn’t have it. He tried and could have been far worse, but no one ever bought him as someone that mattered. Trying to put him in the main event scene in late 2004 didn’t work, but at least they were trying something new. Maven tried but you can only get so far on winning a contest.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw – September 15, 2014: The New Battle Plan

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 15, 2014
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Night of Champions and the World Champion is in the building. Last week a fired up John Cena called out Lesnar to appear here tonight, threatening Paul Heyman with violence if Brock didn’t show up. It should be interesting to see Cena get his hands on Lesnar to put a seed of doubt in Brock for Sunday. Let’s get to it.

We open with Heyman in the ring for his weekly address. He talks about Cena coming to the ring (complete with singing Cena’s music) and waving to the fans before Brock comes out to kill. Cena cuts Paul off before he can get much further and has the black shorts on so you know he’s serious. John asks where Brock is and Heyman starts panicking. If Brock isn’t here then Heyman is taking Lesnar’s beating.

Heyman gets some cheap pops from the crowd and talks a lot, seemingly stalling for time. He points to the entrance and Cena is ready but Heyman starts laughing. Brock flies on a private plane because he doesn’t like anyone and the plane is delayed. He’ll be here tonight but not until later. Heyman thinks Cena knew Brock was late though because he knows what’s coming when Lesnar arrives.

Paul applauds Cena for being a hero and tries to leave but John grabs him by the neck. Cena doesn’t buy what Heyman said and give Heyman until the show is half done to produce Lesnar. Heyman goes to leave but Cena cuts him off because he doesn’t trust Paul. He’s guaranteed these people a fight and grabs Heyman in a headlock to drag him to the back.

We look back at the Authority beating down Reigns to end last week’s show.

After a break we see Cena taking Heyman into his dressing room and having Great Khali guard the door.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho quickly low bridges Kane to the floor and nails a big dive. Kane pops up and uppercuts Jericho down before sending him into the steps. Back in and Jericho gets two off an enziguri and slaps on a cravate. That’s fine with Kane who sends him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Jericho hitting a middle rope missile dropkick but not being able to follow up. Kane knocks him right back down and puts on another chinlock. The sideslam gets two on Jericho but he dropkicks Kane out of midair on the clothesline attempt.

There’s a top rope ax handle to put the big man in trouble. Jericho hammers away in the corner and gets two off a high cross body. A turnbuckle pad was pulled off somewhere in there. The Walls are easily countered but Jericho bulldogs him down. Kane blocks the Lionsault with a chokeslam attempt but Jericho sends him face first into the exposed buckle for the pin at 13:20.

Rating: D+. Kane is just slow at this point and it’s getting to be a major problem. He isn’t terrible yet but that seems to be the way its trending. There’s only so much you can do when age catches up with you and unfortunately Kane’s in ring abilities aren’t going to be enough to make up for the change.

Heyman tries to call Lesnar.

We look back at Rusev attacking Henry on Smackdown. Some Olympians wish Henry luck in rallying America tonight.

Roman Reigns looks at Rollins turning on him a few months back and says this ends tonight.

Jack Swagger vs. Bo Dallas

Jack drives him into the corner to start but Bo fights back with right hands. Dallas takes him down and puts on a chinlock as the fans aren’t sure what they want to chant. Jack fights up and is put right back in the chinlock. Another attempt at a comeback with a belly to back suplex works but Bo gets two more off a neckbreaker. Dallas misses a middle rope knee drop and Jack makes his real comeback with shoulders in the corner. The Vader Bomb doesn’t get to launch as Dallas rolls to the apron and snaps Jack’s neck across the top rope. Jack rolls through a sunset flip and puts on the Patriot Lock for the submission at 6:00.

Rating: C-. This was an interesting match and I’m surprised Swagger won clean. Bo tapping out is a questionable choice but his gimmick should be fine as he just has to ignore what happened and keep coming back with the same stuff over and over again. It looks like his major push is over though.

The announcers hype up the Network’s schedule for the week.

We look back at the Springer segment from last week.

Nikki Bella/Paige vs. Brie Bella/AJ Lee

Brie’s new music starts off with the words Brie Mode. So she’s going to be drunk and dance a lot? Nikki starts with her sister but tags out before there’s any contact like a heel should. Paige drives knees into Brie’s ribs to take over and mocks AJ for not being able to make a tag. Brie gets in a quick rollup for two so Paige headbutts her down. A jawbreaker almost allows the hot tag but Nikki takes AJ down. The Rampaige pins Brie at 2:58.

Post match Nikki lays her sister out while the other girls have a skip off.

We look at Big Show stopping Bray Wyatt from making it to the ring on Smackdown.

Bray talks about David slaying Goliath but the giant still lives today in the form of misery and sorrow. Bray has been left with the burden of having to fix everything. He’ll fix the Big Show. Follow the Buzzards.

Heyman tries to leave because he can’t get cell reception. Khali takes the phone and breaks it before throwing Heyman back inside. He picks up the phone and tries to call someone to no avail. This was a waste of time.

Bray Wyatt vs. Big Show

Wyatt hammers away to start but Show shoves him into the corner. The chop is loaded up but Bray shoves him off, only to make Show chop him even harder. Bray hits some corner splashes and stops himself before charging into Show’s boot. A kind of jawbreaker to the ankle and a clothesline have Big Show in trouble. Bray DDTs him for two and we hit the chinlock to slow things down. Show suplexes him way out and nails some clotheslines but Bray hits his cross body for two. Rowan gets on the apron but Bray is whipped into his minion. Big Show nails the Final Cut on Bray but Harper runs in for the DQ at 4:49.

Rating: D+. That could have been far worse. Bray losing by DQ is far better than him losing via pinfall for the sake of the annual “build up Big Show for a match he has no chance of winning” title shot and there was a legitimate chance he could have kicked out anyway. In theory this could be a match on Sunday as I don’t think either guy has anything to do at the moment.

Show chokeslams Harper and Rowan post match, making Bray laugh.

Cesaro/Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos/Sheamus

That’s quite the odd heel partnership. Sheamus and Goldust get things going with the threat of a Brogue Kick sending Goldust out to the floor. Stardust goes to check on him and meows for…..luck I guess? Back in and Jey comes off the top to go after the arm but Goldust drives him into the corner for a tag to Stardust. Cesaro grabs Jey from the apron for ten forearms to the chest.

Jey shrugs it off and tags in Jimmy to clean house with a Samoan drop to Goldust. Off to Stardust with a shot to the head for two before throwing Jimmy to the floor. Back from a break with Cesaro dancing a jig and getting two off a double stomp to Jimmy. A gutwrench suplex puts Jimmy down and it’s off to Stardust for some shots in the corner. Back to Cesaro who poses a lot and puts on a front facelock.

Jimmy powers out and makes the hot tag to Sheamus who immediately cleans house. Cesaro gets caught in a series of forearms to the chest but Stardust makes the save with a rollup. Sheamus knocks both of them to the floor and hits the battering ram off the top. Back in and Sheamus Brogue Kicks Stardust but walks into the Neutralizer. Jimmy makes a last second save and superkicks Cesaro down, setting up the Superfly Splash from Jey for the pin at 13:10.

Rating: C. Nice six man here and there’s nothing wrong with putting two feuds together into a single match. I’m not wild on Cesaro taking a fall but they back themselves into a corner with the booking here. There wasn’t a good way to end the match with a pin but at least the action before the pin was good.

We look at Ambrose being put out of action last month.

Orton says he had to attack Jericho last week because Jericho said Orton has been handed everything in WWE. This Sunday, Jericho gets the beating of his life.

Cena thanks Khali and drags Heyman to the ring. He says produce the beast or be ready to lose your teeth. Heyman starts talking and says this is the beast that he’s been trying to drag out of Cena but he knows Cena won’t be ready on Sunday. Paul has been trying to get Cena to become the beast that can stop the beast of Brock but Cena just can’t do it because of his inner code. Heyman says Cena can’t be a bully because Cena can’t even punch him in the face when Heyman deserves it. That means Cena will never be champion again because he can’t beat Brock Lesnar.

John takes the mic from him and says if there was a human being that deserves to have his face rearranged, it’s Heyman. Paul says do it and become a Paul Heyman Guy but Cena still won’t do it. Cena is about to leave but Paul plays his ace and says Cena’s mother raised a son with some testicular fortitude. That’s enough for Cena as he shoves Heyman to the floor…..and here’s Brock.

Cena is all fired up and wants a piece but Lesnar calmly walks around the ring. He takes the belt off but just puts it over his shoulder. They start walking off but Brock hands the title to Heyman. Cena says let’s go and Brock walks to the ring and gets on the apron. He actually gets in and the fight is on. Brock puts Cena down with a release German suplex and kicks him to the floor with ease. John gets up and knocks Brock to the floor. Brock is sent into the apron and barricade before they fight on the ground. Lesnar covers up until security drags them apart. The champion leaves and might have a busted up nose.

Cameron vs. Naomi

This is based on something that happened on Total Divas last night, which still happened at least two months ago as Daniel Bryan’s neck surgery was announced on the same episode. Naomi gets tired of waiting on Cameron to look in her mirror and goes after her, only to be sent to the floor when trying her stupid hip shake headscissors. Cameron gets two (after trying to cover Naomi with her face down) off a snap suplex before cranking on Naomi’s arms. Back up and Naomi grabs a sunset flip before putting on a freaky looking leg choke for the submission at 4:32.

Rating: D. The bad is almost all on Naomi here as she can’t eve cover someone right. Do you have any idea how hard it is to not be able to cover someone the right way? Kamala used to do that with the gimmick of being a savage that didn’t know what he was doing. The problem is Cameron is supposed to be a competent wrestler and looks that dumb in the process.

Yeah it might be character, but when her development is on Total Divas and consists of dancing, looking at a camera and talking about “chingle chingle” (the scene where Bryan tries to have a conversation with her is hysterical), it’s hard to buy it as being put on. Naomi was trying here and has something with that choke though.

Dolph Ziggler/R-Ziggler vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

They did this on Smackdown already as R-Truth is playing Dolph’s stunt double, down to the same gear and moveset. The joke though is no one can tell them apart (JBL: “Like the Beverly Brothers!” Old school fans will get why that’s funny) and the announcers play it seriously. Ziggler works on Sandow to start before it’s off to Truth for stereo elbows.

Truth gets taken down by Miz and it’s off to Mizdow as the announcers can’t tell them apart either. Truth finally escapes Miz and makes the diving tag to Ziggler. Miz gets two off a quick rollup but gets caught in the Fameasser for two. Everything breaks down and Miz hits his partner, allowing Dolph to hit the Zig Zag for the pin at 5:08. Oddly enough Lawler was cheering for Miz and Mizdow.

Rating: D. This is another reason why I regret watching Smackdown. Not only did they do this EXACT SAME JOKE over there, but the idea was fresher and better because it was the first time. It also helped that Sandow took the pin instead of Miz, meaning it didn’t affect the title match on Sunday. I’m hoping Miz wins the title as I’m liking this Hollywood star character.

Rollins won’t take anything away from Reigns but Roman is nothing without him. He calls Reigns a neanderthal and imitates Roman walking on his knuckles like a gorilla. Reigns is part gorilla, part Samoan and part rhinoceros. A rhinoceros is one of the most powerful animals in the world but they’re not that smart. Tonight Rollins is going to show Reigns why he led the Shield.

Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Don’t these two already have a match at Night of Champions? Seth speeds things up to start and snaps Roman’s throat across the top rope. A hard clothesline sends Rollins running to the floor but Roman catches him trying to come back in and sends him face first onto the concrete. Back in and another shot puts Rollins on the floor as Reigns is dominating. Rollins is thrown over the announcers’ table and we take a break. Back with Reigns missing the Apron Kick and getting caught by a suicide dive into the barricade.

Reigns quickly fights back and nails him in the face before hitting the Apron Kick. The Superman Punch looks to set up the spear but Seth leapfrogs him and nails a low superkick for two. Back up and Seth tries what looks like a Pedigree off the top but gets countered into a slow motion backdrop, only to have Rollins catch him in an impressive running buckle bomb across the ring for two more. Reigns gets back up, ducks a charge and hits the spear for the pin at 11:23.

Rating: B-. The match was good but why in the world do you have this match in full with a clean ending before they have the same match six days later? That’s some very odd booking and a sign that they don’t have enough people to fill in a three hour show every week. This is even worse when you consider how many people they have on the roster but how few they put any effort into.

We recap Cena vs. Lesnar as 11pm passes.

It’s time for Henry to rally America before his match on Sunday. He talks about having a second chance to represent the United States after he was injured at the Olympics. For all the fans waving the American flag, he can’t let you down. Henry says Lana couldn’t make all her statements without living in America, so here are Lana and Rusev to cut him off. Lana says American intelligence is dropping faster than President Obama’s approval ratings.

She brings up Henry competing in the 1992 Olympic Games but Russia actually won that year. We get a picture of that year’s winner and Lana goes on about how Henry fakes his injury in 1996 to avoid being defeated again. Henry tries the Pledge of Allegiance but Rusev comes in for the brawl. Rusev kicks him down but Henry powers out of the Accolade and chokebombs the Russian. Old Glory is waved to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Very strange choices in the last twenty minutes aside, this was an interesting episode. It seemed like they were trying to book around Monday Night Football as Cena kept using the word halftime when talking about Heyman. I wasn’t looking at the clock, but I would bet that the segment took place during halftime of the football game. If that’s true, it’s one of the smartest things WWE has done in a long time.

WWE cannot contend with the NFL, so don’t try to. Don’t put some big moment at the beginning of the show, because fans are going to pick the football every time due to lesser interest, the ton of recaps and the bunch of other shows you can see the segment on again during the week. By putting it on when there’s no choice to be made, you ensure the far bigger audience is available. That’s actually thinking for a change instead of just ramming your head into a wall and being surprised when the wall doesn’t move.

The ending segment was a very odd choice, but I’d assume it’s the same mentality: why try to fight the NFL with a big segment when it’s going to be wasted? As I’m writing this, the game is a tie in the fourth quarter so it looks like WWE is playing it smart. The show was good overall and I’m liking some of the stuff I’m seeing anymore. I’m still leaning towards Lesnar on Sunday, but there’s actual doubt there now and that was the goal of this show. Good stuff tonight with a lot of the dumb being cut out and replaced with entertainment.

Results

Chris Jericho b. Kane – Rollup

Jack Swagger b. Bo Dallas – Patriot Lock

Nikki Bella/Paige b. Brie Bella/AJ Lee – Rampaige to Brie

Big Show b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when Luke Harper interfered

Sheamus/Usos b. Stardust/Goldust/Cesaro – Superfly Splash to Cesaro

Naomi b. Cameron – Leg choke

Roman Reigns b. Seth Rollins – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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Wrestler of the Day – September 13: Brian Lee

Today we’ve got a big power wrestler that used to be undead: Brian Lee.

Like so many others, Lee got his start in Memphis. We’ll pick things up in his rookie year on March 5, 1989.

Jim McPherson/Brian Lee vs. Dutch Mantel/Master of Pain

Mantel is better known today as Zeb Colter and Master of Pain is better known as, ahem, the Undertaker. Lee locks up with Dutch to start and it’s quickly off to the Master. A right hand has no effect on Master so it’s off to Jim for some meaningless kicks to the ribs. Master kicks Lee in the face and brings Dutch back in for a thumb to the eye. Back to the Master who no sells a dropkick and hammers away in the corner. A powerslam doesn’t get a cover as it’s back to Dutch for some choking with a tag rope. We’re running out of time so Master plants Jim with a Boss Man Slam for the pin.

Rating: D. This was a squash that was running against the clock. As usual it’s always cool to see people who are going to become big deals in the future when they’re just starting out. Everyone has to learn at some point and Undertaker had a lot of the traits going for him that would make him famous later.

Brian would get a tryout match for WCW at Clash of the Champions XIII.

Brian Lee vs. Z-Man

Lee is a tall but not very thick guy who would become a bigger deal later in his career in ECW under the same name and then the WWF as Chainz. This is his tryout match here as the Clash of the Champions continues to be a place to put a bunch of new guys on TV. He runs Z-Man over with a hard shoulder block but walks into a hiptoss to speed things up for a few seconds. It’s only a few seconds though as Z-Man misses a cross body and crashes to the mat. We hit the chinlock on Z-Man but he easily fights up, slams Lee and gets the pin off a missile dropkick.

Rating: D. This was another short match in a series of them tonight and the formula didn’t work all that well here. Z-Man’s comeback and pin came within a span of fifteen seconds so there wasn’t any time to get into it. It’s not a terrible match but it didn’t have the time to go anywhere and what we got wasn’t much to see.

Time for a cup of coffee in Puerto Rico. From WWC in 1991.

California Studs vs. Invader #4/Jerry Mercado

The Studs are Lee and the Dirty White Boy Tony Anthony before he was dirty, though he has the white part down. Lee and the much smaller Invader get things going before it’s off to Mercado. Brian shrugs off a wristlock and nails a clothesline followed by a double back elbow from the Studs. It’s quickly back to Lee for a big boot before Anthony plants Mercado with a powerslam. Brian’s top rope knee gets the fast pin.

Rating: D. Another dull match here and the Dirty White Boy didn’t help anything out. I would have thought one of the 984 Invaders would have been a bit bigger deal than a jobber to a team like the Dirty White Boy and the eventual fake Undertaker. Nothing to see here, but Brian needs to stop using so many basic holds. He’s 6’9 and wrestles like he’s about a foot shorter.

It was off to Smoky Mountain where Lee would have some of his greatest success. We’ll start on June 6, 1992.

Brian Lee vs. Barry Horowitz

Brian is SMW Champion but this is non-title. Barry hides in the corner to start but a big hiptoss and dropkick put Horowitz down. We hit the headlock for a bit on Horowitz but he fights up with some right hands and a side slam. Barry gets crotched on top and powerslammed down for two. In a kind of lame finish, Lee picks him up for a Razor’s Edge but drops to his knees for a backbreaker and the pin.

Rating: D+. That finish is the kind of stuff I’m talking about with Lee. Instead of launching him across the ring or straight down, the backbreaker didn’t look all that devastating. Lifting Barry up like that was a nice power display, but the actual move didn’t look all that great. Still though, at least it’s a power move.

Still in SMW at some point in 1993.

Brian Lee vs. Kevin Sullivan

This is part of along feud where Sullivan has sent a series of men to try and take Lee out before finally just doing the job himself. This is a Singapore Spike match where there is a box on each corner and only one holds a spike to use as a weapon. Brian’s partner Tim Horner and Sullivan’s minion the Nightstalker are handcuffed to posts. Lee hammers away to start and the fight is quickly on the floor. Sullivan sends him face first into a table and nails him with a chair but can’t get into a box.

Lee is thrown to the floor but comes back in with a chair to the back. Two boxes are checked and empty so they head back outside to brawl some more. Sullivan hits him in the ribs with a hammer to almost no effect. Back in and Sullivan stabs him with pliers before checking the other two boxes. There’s no spike so Lee makes his comeback with right hands and a cross body which takes out the referee. Nightstalker gets on the apron with the spike in his hand but hits Sullivan by mistake, allowing Brian to roll him up for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was a decent brawl and the story helped things a bit. It’s always a plus when you give me a reason to care why the face is in trouble but wants to fight anyway as it makes him seem like a hero and the villain look like a coward for resorting to cheating. Lee is getting better as he’s starting to find himself in the ring.

Brian would make a one off appearance in the WWF at Summerslam 1994 as the Fake Undertaker.

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

We’ll call them real and fake to tell them apart. The fake one is played by ECW’s Primetime Brian Lee who wrestled in the WWF as Chainz. For the real entrance, we have druids, a casket containing the Urn and then the real guy. The entrances alone take about 10 minutes. Real is a few inches taller and blocks a right hand before pounding on Fake a bit. A big boot and uppercut send Fake to the floor, allowing Real to suplex him back in for no cover.

Fake is thrown to the floor again but Real follows him out this time. Back in and Fake hits a Stunner across the top rope to take over. This is VERY slow so far and the idea isn’t interesting at all. Real blocks Fake’s Old School but Fake sits up. The Real’s Old School connects but Fake clotheslines Real down. The crowd is SILENT for this nonsense which Vince writes off as being in shock.

Real misses a charge and falls to the floor where Fake sends him into the steps. Back in and Real wins a slugout but walks into a good chokeslam for no cover. Fake Tombstones him down but takes too long to cover, allowing for the sit up. A second Tombstone is countered into the Real one, followed by two more for the pin.

Rating: F. Well that happened. Seriously, what else do you want me to say about this? It went on for ten minutes, they were aspiring to hit a snail’s pace and the Chicago crowd, as in one of the most insane groups of fans you’ll ever see, was quieter than a cemetery watching this mess. Taker would literally spend the next year feuding with DiBiase and company.

Brian would head back to Memphis and the USWA for a short stretch, including this match in July 1995.

Brian Lee vs. Sid Vicious

The winner gets a title shot at some point in the future. Sid takes him into the corner and actually offers a clean break. A slam sends Brian to the floor and we get an inset interview from Sid, talking about how easy a road he has to the title. Back in and Brian’s lacket sends in a foreign object to knock Sid down to the mat. Some big shots in the corner don’t have much effect as Sid nails a clothesline, only to get knocked back down for two. A big boot and weak looking chokeslam put Sid down for no cover. Instead Sid pops up and chokeslams Lee followed by the powerbomb, but Billy Jack Haynes comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D. That big boot and chokeslam combination looked pretty bad but there’s only so much you can do in there against a guy like Sid. These giant vs. giant matches rarely work and this wasn’t much better than the majority of them. The bad looking moves bring it down a further notch though.

Lee would go to ECW and be part of the Tommy Dreamer vs. Raven feud. Here he is facing Dreamer in a pretty famous scaffold match at High Incident 1996.

Brian Lee vs. Tommy Dreamer

There’s a scaffold above the ring and a three stacks of three tables each in the ring. You win by knocking someone off the scaffold and through said tables. Instead of going near that they head to the back of the building and casually walk around without trying to hurt each other. Dreamer finally rams him into a wall a few times before nailing Brian in the head with a trashcan. A hard chair shot to Tommy’s back has Lee in control and he rams Dreamer face first into some kind of block. Dreamer is busted open. Now they’re in the crowd with Tommy fighting back, only to get hit in the head with a cooler.

Dreamer gets crotched on the barricade as they finally make it to ringside. A powerslam drives Tommy onto the concrete but he comes back with a pie to the head. Both guys climb the scaffolding, finding that much safer than a tasty dessert. Lee slams him face first into the scaffold but Dreamer hits him low. We get a very scary DDT on the scaffold has Lee in trouble but Tommy can’t throw him through the tables. Lee fights back with right hands and kicks Dreamer low to almost knock him off. Tommy gets in a low blow of his own and punches away until Lee goes through the tables.

Rating: D-. I didn’t completely hate it but this was barely wrestling. I will give them this though: at least the scaffolding had enough room to let them get their footing. The Living Dangerously mess with New Jack and Grimes had them basically standing on a bar with nothing to help them out. I almost didn’t rate it but it’s almost too famous not to.

One more ECW match at Cyberslam 1997.

Raven/Brian Lee vs. Terry Funk/Tommy Dreamer

Raven is world champion. If Funk beats Raven, he gets a shot at the title at Barely Legal. Lee is a hired gun here. This is during the Dreamer can’t beat Raven angle which I would have ended at Barely Legal, but instead they went with Funk who is the guy that was from the NWA and therefore what they were against, but hey who cares about that right? Beulah, who is dating Tommy at this point, is here being her sexy self.

We get big match intros because we need to have them for what is I guess the main event. Raven comes in and lays down to let Dreamer beat him for the first time in his life so that Funk can’t get the pin to get the title shot. Dreamer, ever the moron, hits him instead. Raven pops up and says “Hey Dreamer why didn’t you pin me?” That was funny for some reason.

Off to Funk so Raven runs and hides. Dreamer comes in again as this is stupid so far. Powerslam by Lee and he brings in Raven. Dreamer gets a DDT and tags in Funk immediately to let him try to get a win. Back off to Lee as this has been pretty basic so far. Raven won’t fight Funk so the fans chant bull. Raven and Dreamer go to the floor and the others join them. An ECW match turning into a brawl? NO WAY!!!

They’re in the crowd already and I have a feeling I’ll be able to read a novel or so while this is going on. Funk and Raven wind up back in the ring and Raven hits him low. Dreamer and Lee are on the floor having the real fight since Funk is old and Raven is probably stoned. He grabs the mic and yells at Funk for awhile while everyone looks at Dreamer and Lee who are off camera.

This creates an obvious problem of Raven vs. Funk is more or less the occasional punch and Raven yelling while the fans are all looking away at the violence on the floor. Funk grabs the mic and I’d suggest a censor button on standby. He kicks Raven’s leg out a few times and it’s the spinning toe hold. Raven screams that he quits but there’s no referee. The referee finally comes in and Lee hits Funk with a trashcan.

Lee hammers on everyone with the trashcan. Dreamer tries to protect Funk so Funk keeps getting up. Funk can’t stand up and is bleeding from the ear. Oh I have a bad feeling where this might be going. Yep the doctors are here to check on Terry and he still wants to fight. Is this supposed to be impressive or something? Terry is put on a stretcher after a few attempts and is taken to the back.

And now it’s time to make this the big angle of the show as here’s Stevie Richards who is all ticked off at Raven which I guess explains him being in the triple threat at Barely Legal. Raven wants to be kicked but Lee picks Richards off and chokeslams him. Lori Fullington, Sandman’s ex-wife comes out and is mad at Raven also. Take a DDT boy. Down she goes also.

Dreamer, ever the genius, comes out with Sandman’s son Tyler who was brainwashed by Raven at one point. Here’s a beatdown for Dreamer as well. Sandman comes out with his son on his shoulders and it’s some big emotional moment or whatever. Sandman fights both guys off and pins Raven just because. Now there’s your triple threat and Dreamer is left out in the cold. Yep that’s how they set up their first PPV people.

Rating: F+. Dude, seriously? Another big brawl, an injury angle to an old man, an ex-wife and son being brought out and a guy that hasn’t been seen the entire night is now #1 contender. Stevie is in the same spot now for getting chokeslammed and I guess beating Balls Mahoney earlier. And people wonder why non-ECW fans complain aboutnot being able to understand this company. I had no idea why they were in that match until I saw this show. Not like that’s important information to say at Barely Legal or anything right?

It was off to the WWF after this where Lee was named Chainz and put in charge of the biker group known as the Disciples of Apocalypse. We’ll start at Summerslam 1997.

Los Boricuas vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

This is the Puerto Rican gang vs. the bikers as GANG WARZ continue. Vince calls this an eight man tag because he doesn’t care enough about any of these guys. These guys feuded FOREVER and I don’t remember the bikers ever winning a match in the feud. Savio Vega and Crush are the respective leaders and the rest are pretty interchangeable other than Chainz being the only other biker with hair.

It’s a brawl to start of course and the bikers clear the ring. Skull starts with Jose and the big man throws him around with ease. Off to 8 Ball who hits a spinning sidewalk slam before bringing in Crush. Miguel comes in but walks into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for no cover. Back to Skull and 8 Ball (identical twins) to crush Miguel in the corner until Savio cheats to take over. All four Boricuas pound on Skull in the corner until the Nation of Domination (now with Ahmed Johnson) comes down to ringside, basically stopping the match cold.

Jesus hits a Fameasser on Skull to set up another four on one beatdown. We hit a chinlock but 8 Ball breaks it up to prevent further boredom. Skull finally gets over for the tag and everything breaks down. Chainz is sent to the floor and punches Ahmed who responds with a sitout powerbomb on the concrete, giving Miguel an easy pin in the ring.

Rating: D-. Oh man this was dull to sit through. Los Boricuas just weren’t interesting at all and other than Savio they easily could have been interchanged with one another. The bikers weren’t much better but at least you could remember which was which. I guess the idea here was to appeal to a wider fanbase but it didn’t do anything for me.

And the rematch from In Your House XVIII.

Los Boricuas vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

Los Boricuas are Miguel Perez, Jose Estrada, Jesus Castillo and Savio Vega while the Disciples are Crush, Chainz, Skull and 8-Ball. Skull starts with Jose with the much bigger Disciple taking over to start. 8-Ball and Skull (identical twins) hit a double big boot to take Jose down and it’s off to Miguel who walks into a powerslam for two.

Chainz and Savio come in with the biker scoring with a quick belly to belly for two before it’s off to Jesus who is slammed down just as easily. Everything nearly breaks down on the floor before Jesus takes over on Crush back inside. All four of the Boricuas come in for three running clotheslines and a spinwheel kick from Savio to Crush before Miguel hooks a chinlock.

The referee goes to the floor to stop another brawl, allowing the remaining Boricuas to triple team Crush again. A missile dropkick gets two for Jesus and we hit ANOTHER chinlock. Crush finally fights up and everything breaks down with Crush hitting a quick big boot but there’s no referee. Jesus gets a close two off a DDT but Chainz pins Miguel off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.

Rating: F+. This show is really getting bad about having dull matches. As has been the case since the beginning of this feud, no one cares about these teams or anyone on them. None of the guys on the team save for arguably their leaders do anything that sets them apart. I was having trouble remembering which Boricua was which. That’s a bad sign in an eight minute match.

Here’s a tag match from Raw on February 8, 1998.

Farrooq/Rocky Maivia vs. Chainz/Ken Shamrock

Each team has three people with them which was to set up the War of Attrition match on Sunday which was rather stupid for a name since it was one fall to a finish. Lawler is on commentary here. Rocky is IC Champion and the fans think he sucks. Rock grabs a mic and says the fans want to know his opinion on human genetic cloning.

This was a thing he was doing around this time: giving his opinion on major issues. For instance, he doesn’t care about global hunger as long as his yard is mowed. Funny as all goodness of course. Here he’s in favor, but only with people that deserve to be cloned. In other words, just him.

Farrooq vs. Chainz to start us off here but it’s off to Shamrock very quickly. Rock wants in surprisingly enough and Shamrock kicks his hips with ease. Back to Farrooq again as they’re tagging very quickly here. Rocky and Farrooq switch AGAIN before I finish typing that sentence. Chainz comes in and gets his head handed to him by the majority of the Nation. Powerslam by Farrooq gets two.

Rock hammers Chainz down and hits what would become the People’s Elbow. He didn’t have the whole thing down yet. Back to the former Ron Simmons who works on the back for awhile. Shamrock and Rock come in and it’s all the Sham version here. Somehow we get Farrooq in the ankle lock but Rock pops Ken in the head with a chair to end this pretty quickly.

Rating: D+. Pretty fast match here which wasn’t bad but I’ve seen worse. The problem here was that they went WAY too fast with the tagging and it kept them from getting anything going. The war match was just ok if I remember. Rock vs. Shamrock would happen at Mania which was a Dusty Finish. Not bad here but just filler to get us to the PPV with this angle.

And a singles match from Raw on June 8, 1998.

Darren Drozdov vs. Chainz

We get a video of how Droz got the name Puke. I’ll let you visualize that yourselves. Droz is NOT a member of the LOD. He just hangs out with them and feuds with the people they’re feuding and is in their tag matches. Ok then. Chainz takes over and it’s official: Mankind vs. Taker is Hell in a Cell. Chainz misses a middle rope elbow and Droz does the same with a corner splash, allowing Chainz to win with a Death Valley Driver. Too short to rate but it was nothing of note at all.

Lee would hit the indies for awhile after this but would return in TNA in 2002. Here he as at Weekly PPV #12 where Lee was one of two men remaining in a battle royal, earning him a Tag Team Title shot.

Tag Titles: James Storm/Chris Harris vs. Brian Lee/Ron Haris

Ron chokeslams James on the stage to start things off as a handicap match. Also here’s Jeff Jarrett to beat up BG James and take the focus off the title match. Lee kicks Chris in the face as AMW (are they even called that yet?) is in big trouble. Chris comes back for a bit but gets clotheslined down for two. West points out the problem here: too many people named James and Harris.

Storm finally gets back in and cleans house, only to get caught in a chokeslam/belly to back suplex combo for no cover. Ron pulls out a table for no apparent reason and lays Storm out on top of it. Lee loads up Chris in a chokeslam but gets rolled up (and into the ropes) to give AMW the pin and the titles.


Rating: D. This was barely even a match with Chris getting beaten down for a few minutes and Storm being on the floor most of the time. The table thing was stupid and the ending was even worse as both guys were in the ropes for the fall and the referee counted it anyway. Nothing to see here, but at least the right team won.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00LWSOTGK

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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WrestleZone Forums Tag Team Tournament

This is something we’re starting up again and I’ll be at the helm.

 

Basically we’ve taken 64 of the best tag teams of all time and put them in a seeded bracket.  There will be 8 matches set up a day (the first batch will be released later today) for four days for the first round.  We run a singles version every spring to coincide with Wrestlemania and now we’re trying the tag version again.

 

You all should join in on this as it’s going to be fun and a good way to learn about some teams you might not have heard much about before.  If you’ve never been to WrestleZone’s Forums (which are completely different from the nitwits on their main page), you should check them out and join to participate in the tournament.  The regular version is one of our biggest events of the year and this one will be fun too.  Check it out and look for the first matches tonight.

 

http://forums.wrestlezone.com/forumdisplay.php?f=491




Required Viewing #12: I Want Violence

WarGames.

Because I have a taste for some blood. For those of you young people that haven’t gotten to see this, it’s the ultimate team violence match. There are two rings side by side and they’re both surrounded by cage, save for the space between the rings. There are two teams of five men (later four) each and one man will start from both teams. They fight for five minutes and then there’s a coin toss. The winning team (the heels literally always won) would get to send in a second man for a 2-1 advantage, lasting two minutes. After those two minutes are up, the team that lost the toss sends in its second man to tie it up for two minutes. You alternate until all ten men are in and then it’s first submission wins.

This match almost always had a ton of blood and are easily the most violent matches you would find this side of Hell in a Cell. WCW started these in 1987 and ran them through 1997 (screw that mess in 1998. That wasn’t WarGames). We’re going to be looking at the two best, though almost all of them are worth checking out.

First up is the inaugural edition, held on July 4, 1987 on the Great American Bash tour.  This is the mother of all wars as we have Dusty Rhodes/Magnum TA/Road Warriors/Paul Ellering vs. the Four Horsemen/JJ Dillon.  I really don’t think this needs a huge explanation.

 

Dusty Rhodes/Road Warriors/Nikita Koloff/Paul Ellering vs. Four Horsemen/JJ Dillon

The Horsemen in this case are Flair, Anderson, Blanchard, Luger and JJ Dillon. Flair’s music is epic as they crank the music WAY up. This is the Atlanta main event and it’s the debut of WarGames. For those of you uninitiated, WarGames is the mother of all gimmick matches. You have two teams of five and each team sends in a member. Those two fight for five minutes and there’s a coin toss.

The winning team gets to send in the third man to have a 2-1 advantage. That lasts two minutes and then the team that lost the toss gets to send in its second man to tie it at 2-2. That lasts two minutes then the team that won the toss sends in its third man. You alternate like that every two minutes until it’s 5-5 and then it’s first submission. No pins allowed.

Arn and Dusty start us off and remember this can’t end until all ten are in. There are two rings side by side with one huge cage over them if I didn’t mention that. They feel each other out a lot as they’re not entirely sure what to do here. Dusty walks on the second rope and then swings across the top of the cage to kick him in the ribs. Now they’re going and Dusty pounds away including a low blow which is perfectly legal.

There’s a DDT by Dusty and the crowd is red hot. Arn is cut open about two and a half minutes in so Dusty rakes it across the cage wall. Everyone hates everyone on the other team so this is a huge blood feud all around. Dusty sends him into the cage and has dominated the entire time. After a quick comeback by Arn Dusty gets his bad Figure Four on and then lets go of it because….well just because I guess.

The Horsemen win the toss (the faces literally never won the thing) and it’s Tully in next. The Horsemen beat him down but Dusty is booking so he knocks them both down with elbows. And scratch that as Tully gets in a knee shot and the double teaming begins. Tully puts on a Figure Four as they work over the knee. The clock seems to skip ahead a bit (no sign of clipping though) and Animal comes in to tie it up.

He starts launching Horsemen everywhere and sets Tully up for a slingshot which he rams three straight times. Shoulder block takes Tully down and Dusty destroys Anderson. I think Blanchard is busted and he gets double teamed a bit. Anderson looks dead. Animal is like screw that and rams him into the cage a few times. Flair is in to make it 3-2 and chops at Animal which doesn’t work. The number catch up with him as Anderson is back up quickly.

Sorry for a lot of play by play here but it’s the only thing you can do in matches like this one. Animal is busted. Dusty tries to fight back but he’s almost on his own. The fans are so loud that you can’t hear Tony and Jim. Dusty is bleeding and here comes Nikita. Flair grabs him as he comes in but the power of RUSSIA breaks up the Horsemen. The double ring thing here is very nice as they have room to move around. Animal sends Flair into the cage and he’s bleeding now. Dusty is gushing blood.

Nikita and Dusty work on the knee of Anderson but Nikita goes to get Tully stuck between the two rings and hits him between the ropes in a slingshot thing. Flair begs off Nikita and that doesn’t end well for the champ. A double dropkick puts Anderson down and here’s Lex. This is literally non-stop. Powerslam plants Koloff and Lex is dominating. There’s a spike piledriver to Nikita and then a second one just to kill him deader than dead. The Horsemen are in control but they’re starting to fall from exhaustion and blood loss.

Here’s Hawk and the fans erupt all over again. He destroys everything in sight and if you’re not bleeding already you will be now. Nikita’s neck is messed up and he can barely stand. JR is in Heaven with this much carnage. Flair gets a Figure Four on Dusty but it doesn’t count yet. The Horsemen only have JJ Dillon left and he’s a manger. He goes after Hawk and that’s just dumb.

Flair saves JJ’s life and they’re getting tired. Flair is bleeding a ton as if you expected anything else. JJ is taking a beating but Animal is getting triple teamed. Here’s Ellering to get us all tied up and now the match can end. Ellering has an LOD spiked pad on his arm. Dillon is bleeding BAD so Ellering JAMS THE SPIKE INTO HIS EYE. The LOD circles in on Dillon as the rest of the team runs interference. The Warriors spear his head into the cage and load up the Doomsday Device. JJ lands on his shoulder, legitimately hurting it. With Animal running interference, Hawk beats him half to death until he gives up to finally end this.

Rating: A+. This runs 26 minutes and there is literally no stopping in the whole thing. There isn’t some period where they chill because they’ve done enough. This is about brutality and violence and it works very well. There’s a ton of blood and JJ looks like he fell out of a building (for some reason in wrestling attire) at the end of it. It’s well worth seeing and still works today. Great match.

 

Next up might be the greatest WCW match of all time.  This is the blowoff to the awesome Dangerous Alliance story as Sting and his buddies are finally getting to go against the Alliance in one huge, bloody match with an all-star lineup.  From WrestleWar 1992.

 

War Games: Sting’s Squadron vs. Dangerous Alliance

Sting, Ricky Steamboat, Dustin Rhodes, Barry Windham, Nikita Koloff
Rick Rude, Steve Austin, Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Eaton, Arn Anderson

Sweet goodness there is some talent in this match.

Ok so there isn’t much of a backstory here. Back in 1992 the storyline pretty much went like this: Sting fights everybody. He feuded with about 5 people at once, most of which are in this match. At Halloween Havoc and the Clash of the Champions that came just after it, Rude showed up and stole the US Title from Sting, forming this team. Sting won the world title at SuperBrawl and the Alliance wanted it off of him, no matter who did it (it would be Vader eventually but we’ll get to that later).

Larry and Arn were a tag team and feuded with Barry and Dustin over the tag titles. Barry had also just gotten the TV Title off Austin. Ricky wanted to be US Champion, which was Rude at the moment. Anderson and Eaton had taken them from Rhodes and Windham before losing them to the Steiners two weeks before this. In short, everyone hates everyone and they don’t care who they’re fighting. Koloff is there….just because Sting needed a fifth guy more or less. He would go after Rude after this PPV.

For those of you new to War Games, the rules are pretty basic. You start with a man each and they fight for five minutes. After that five minutes we flip a coin and the winning team gets to send in their second man for a 2-1 advantage that lasts two minutes. After two minutes, the team that lost gets to even it up at 2-2 for two minutes. After that two minutes the team that won the toss sends in it’s third man for two minutes. You alternate like that until it’s 5-5, then first submission wins. No pinfalls at all. It’s a double cage over both rings and there is nothing separating the two rings, so both cages only have three walls in essence, but it’s really just one big cage.

This is the first time I’ve seen this match since I got into the IWC and since I started reviewing, so this is going to be a fresh look at it. Let’s get to it.

Everyone is at ringside for this, so I’d expect a fight out there too. There are tops on the cages too. Crowd is just insane for Sting. Good grief that face team is STACKED. In a Dangerous Alliance huddle, we hear that Austin is starting for his team. He starts against Windham and it is ON immediately. Heyman keeps running strategy and it’s cool because what he’s saying is actual strategy and makes sense.

Both guys are really stiff in there and are just pounding on each other. Austin DIVES over both ropes and hits a clothesline. For those of you that haven’t seen him before he hurt his neck and his knees became made of jelly, go find some of his stuff. He’s a totally different but still very good worker. Windham rubs Austin’s face into the cage to bust him open. There’s a minute left before the next guy comes in. Windham bites the cut to open it up more. If you can’t tell, this is a very violent match.

The Alliance wins the coin toss (check the coin) and they send their big man, Rick Rude, in to make it 2-1. Also, that’s three world champions (Rude won the Big Gold Belt which is kind of a world title) in there I believe? The heels take over and Windham is in trouble. Rude’s tights look like the Comi-Con logo. Steamboat ties it up and goes straight for Austin. Ticked off Steamboat is AWESOME. Dang  it’s nice to hear this without Tony Schiavone making bad war puns.

Windham is busted open. Steamboat and Windham are dominating here but Anderson, the best wrestler to never win a world title (arguably) comes in and cleans house. Rude and Anderson both hook a crab on Steamboat. This has been non-stop the whole time which is a major perk of it. For some reason they’re all staying in the same ring. Well with five guys it’s ok. And there goes Steamboat and Rude so scratch that theory.

Dustin Rhodes comes in to balance it out. If my math is right, he’s the least successful guy in here? That’s saying a lot. Steamboat gets Rude in a figure four, more or less making it 2-2. Zbyszko, another former world champion, is in to make it 4-3. He’s been in trouble lately for being a screw-up and Rhodes beats the tar out of him as soon as he comes in. Madusa goes up the cage and slips Arn the phone but she and Sting have a standoff on the roof.

There is blood EVERYWHERE. The mat looks like an abstract painting. Sting, who has bad ribs thanks to Vader, evens things up and press slams Rude up into the air so that his back slams into the cage five times. Sting is just whipping it here and we have two more guys left to come in. Arn gets the cage rake again and is bleeding too. Everyone is in one ring which is kind of cluttering but there they go. At least it didn’t last long.

Eaton comes in as the last man for the Dangerous Alliance. Rhodes is bleeding a ton. Windham looks quite dead. Larry is messing with the turnbuckle. Keep that in mind as it’ll come into play later. The ropes are clearly loose thanks to Larry and Rude doing whatever they were doing. Koloff comes in to FINALLY start the match beyond. No submissions could have counted until now.

Koloff is a wild card because a year or so earlier he had nailed Sting but claimed it had been meant for Luger so no one is sure if you can trust him. He pushes Sting out of the way to let Austin and Anderson hit him in a GREAT bit of continuity since Sting pushed Luger out of the way to start their whole issue. This is just pure insanity and never stopping at all.

Sting gets the Scorpion on Anderson but Eaton makes the save. They completely get the turnbuckle unhooked so there is no top rope and the buckle is just laying in the ring. Austin is bleeding like crazy. Rhodes’ tights are polka dot now from blood on them. Larry tells Bobby to hold up Sting so he can hit him with the steel bar that came off the buckle. Sting ducks and Eaton takes it to the arm. Steamboat takes Larry out and Sting throws on an armbar for the submission and to blow the roof off the place. Heyman LOSES IT and everyone gets mad at Larry as the show ends. This broke up the Dangerous Alliance because they lost this and it kind of wound up turning Larry face but more or less he just retired.

Rating: A+. This right here is the best gimmick match blowoff to a feud ever. This match was about VIOLENCE and it worked incredibly well. The ending was great, the violence was great, most people bled, there is not a single dead spot in the nearly 25 minutes that this match ran, the crowd was white hot, and the feud ended here. This was it and everyone knew it so they left everything they had in the ring. Perfection for what it was supposed to be.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00LWSOTGK

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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WWE Trivia Game Site

You might have heard me talk about Sporcle before.  Sporcle is a really fun and addictive trivia site with quizzes about everything, ranging from word games to Harry Potter to countries of the world.  Well now they have a WWE section which I use to kill time on a daily basis.  I can highly recommend the random button, though it’s incredibly addictive.  There’s also TNA stuff in there but it’s limited as you would expect.  Check it out.

 

http://www.sporcle.com/games/subcategory/wwe




Wrestler of the Day – September 12: Tom Zenk

Here’s an 80s pretty boy: Tom Zenk.

Zenk got his start in 1984 and we’ll pick things up in his rookie year against Jimmy Garvin in the AWA.

Jimmy Garvin vs. Tom Zenk

After a good while spent on getting Garvin’s clothes off, we’re ready to go. Jimmy grabs a headlock to take him down to the mat but Zenk fights up with a slam. Garvin starts cranking on the leg to slow things down until Tom counters into a chinlock. That goes nowhere as Garvin hammers away on him in the corner. Off to a chinlock on Zenk for a bit before Jimmy throws him out to the floor. Garvin chokes on the rope but Tom comes back in with a hiptoss, only to miss a dropkick. Back up and Tom runs into a boot in the corner, setting up Garvin’s brainbuster for the pin.

Rating: D+. Garvin was better than his most famous period would suggest but this wasn’t the most interesting match in the world. Zenk was pretty generic here but that’s what you have to expect from a rookie like this. It was your standard chinlock/choke match which can only go so far.

Still in the AWA on January 10, 1985 in Winnipeg.

Nick Bockwinkel vs. Tom Zenk

Feeling out process to start with Nick quickly taking him down off a headlock. Back up and the slow start continues until Nick throws him out to the floor. Zenk comes back in and gets sent face first into the buckle, only to nail a dropkick and hiptoss for two. Bockwinkel sidesteps the other dropkick though and nails the piledriver for the pin. Short and almost a squash here.

Off to 1986, still in the AWA.

Masked Superstar vs. Tom Zenk

In theory that’s Ax of Demolition. Superstar has one of the top heel managers, Sheik Adnan Al-Kaissie, in his corner. The masked man hammers away against the ropes and plants Zenk with a hard slam. A stiff right hand to the face has Zenk reeling and Superstar throws him out to the floor. Back in and a running clothesline sets up a swinging neckbreaker to pin Zenk.

Zenk would get hired by the WWF to be part of the next young, fast paced tag team. He and Rick Martel would hook up as the Can-Am Connection with one of their earlier matches taking place on Superstars, January 24, 1987.

Don Muraco/Bob Orton vs. Can-Am Connection

This would eventually open Mania III. I’ve always liked that one so this should be at least good too. They start immediately which is fun. Danny Davis is the referee here. Fink does his third voiceover of the night. Dang he’s getting paid tonight. We have Martel vs. Orton here. The Connection was good but I’ll take Strike Force any day. Fuji calls out the Connection in an inset interview. Speed vs. what you could call power I guess is always fun.

Zenk was good but his attitude was absurd. This isn’t as good as Mania would be but it’s ok for what it is. Also that’s what a show like this is for: polishing for the major show which I’d certainly say Mania was. You know, just the biggest card of all time. It’s a big brawl and they throw it out. Solid until then I guess.

Rating: C-. Not bad for what it was. It’s rare enough to see four big names in a match here but this worked fine. The Connection was a good team and the heels were always good for a quick one. Decent enough for a power vs. speed match, even though Muraco and Orton weren’t the strongest team in the world.

Something WWF would do a lot of back in the day was one night tag team tournament for a title shot later in the night. One of these took place in Toronto on March 15, 1987. Here are the Connection’s two matches.

First Round: Jerry Allen/Dan Spivey vs. Can-Am Connection

This is a very odd choice for a team here. Mike Rotunda had left and Spivey had no partner. Allen on the other hand….was a jobber. He’s kind of like the Carlito of his day, minus the credibility. Yeah think of him like that. Allen and Spivey get no reaction. Can-Ams are the young pretty boys who get big girl pops. Jimmy talks about his clients’ three matches at Mania, including saying that Alice Cooper couldn’t carry a tune if it had handles on it.

That line would be in Honky Tonk Man’s future song, so I wonder who wrote that one. Valiant is REALLY annoying. Allen and Zenk start us off. Wow I’d be so riveted to this match. They botch a leap frog. That’s hard to do. Jimmy lists off some songs his band had. For those of you that don’t know, Hart was in a mainstream band called the Gents and they actually weren’t that bad. They toured with the Beach Boys in the 60s.

We hit the formula stuff so that’s fine. They mention Allen isn’t Spivey’s full time partner. At this time, Valiant is Demolition’s manager. This isn’t very interesting at all. To be fair that could be due to a lack of heel talent. There’s a lot of that going around tonight apparently. This match has been 80% rest holds. Everyone comes in at once and in a pretty weak looking spot, Martel hits Allen with a cross body for the pin.

Rating: D. Just boring as all all goodness here. It was mainly due to the terrible heel team though so I can’t complain much there. The Connection was pretty solid though so I have to give them the benefit of the doubt here. Just a bad match overall though as Allen and Spivey seeming to be a thrown together team.


Semi-Finals: Can-Am Connection vs. Demolition

Demolition is kind of popular here, foreshadowing their face turn…a year and a half from now. Ok so it’s not foreshadowing at all. This is apparently a main event in any arena in the entire world. When anyone says that, the first thing that comes to my mind: WHY IS IT NOT MAIN EVENTING THIS SHOW THEN??? Demolition is dominating for the most part here as you would expect them to. What follows is more or less as basic of a match as you could possibly ask for.

This simply isn’t much to talk about but it’s not bad. Demolition dominates for a good while until Martel gets the hot tag. Everyone comes in, the legal guys go to the floor, Zenk hits the post, and there’s your countout to put Demolition in the finals.

Rating: C-. Not as bad, but still not very good whatsoever. The screwy endings continue here which is rapidly getting on my nerves. It’s another formula match here which is fine but it’s getting very repetitive. Demolition was clearly going to be a big deal in the division but it was still a little ways away.

Here’s Zenk’s most famous match in the opener of Wrestlemania III.

Can-Am Connection vs. Don Muraco/Bob Orton

No story here as they’re just two teams having a match. The Can-Am Connection is Rick Martel (Can) and Tom Zenk (Am) which would kind of evolve into Strike Force. Martel and Muraco start things off with Rick hitting a quick shoulder to take Don down. A hip block and a kind of monkey flip put Muraco down again and it’s a standoff. Zenk comes in for a double monkey flip and it’s off to Orton who gets armdragged down as well.

Bob gets hit from one corner to the other until Zenk takes him down with an armbar. All Connection so far. They trade full nelsons and Muraco hits Orton by mistake for two. Bob gets his arm cranked on a bit until FINALLY making the tag out to Muraco. The bad luck continues for the heels as Don is slammed down and has his arm worked on as well.

Orton and Muraco finally start cheating with a knee to Zenk’s back and a shot from the middle rope. Zenk and Bob ram heads and it’s a double tag as everything breaks down. The heels are sent into each other and a double dropkick takes Orton down. Muraco gets double teamed and a cross body with a trip from Zenk is enough for Martel to get the pin.

Rating: B-. I’ve called this the best opening match in Wrestlemania history and I don’t think it’s that far off from the truth. There are definitely matches of higher quality, but think about what an opening match is supposed to do. It’s designed to set the tone for a show and this one did that. It’s about five and a half minutes long and the good guys beat the bad guys with some nice continuity. It’s nothing flashy but it wasn’t supposed to be. This is a very nice, basic tag match and the crowd was into it, which is all it was supposed to accomplish. Good stuff here.

One more WWF match at SNME XI.

Can-Am Connection vs. Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff

He tries to sing and gets hit in the head with a 2×4. Isn’t that called massive assault? Zenk and the Sheik start us off. Duggan, after BASHING VOLKOFF IN THE HEAD WITH A BOARD just sits right back in the front row. Sheik gets a good abdominal stretch on Sheik. This show needs to end. Duggan runs in AGAIN and Martel rolls up Sheik for the pin.

Rating: D-. I have no idea how you can get away with the whole Duggan thing but the 80s were a very strange time for good guys. I mean, look at Hogan cheating like there was no tomorrow if nothing else. The Connection would be gone soon but they weren’t terrible at this point.

The Connection would split due to Zenk leaving over a contract issue. Martel would wind up teaming with Tito Santana as Strike Force and it’s hard to believe their push wasn’t originally planned for the Can-Am Connection. Anyway, it was off to WCW for Zenk where he would have a good bit more success. We’ll start things off at Clash of the Champions VIII.

Cuban Assassin vs. Z-Man

Z-Man is Tom Zenk, a young guy in great shape freshly over from the AWA and the WWF before that. Assassin gets hiptossed over and a dropkick sends him to the floor as Z-Man is starting fast. Back in and we hit the top wristlock on the Cuban followed by an armbar. Assassin fights up and headbutts Z-Man to take over, only to miss a middle rope headbutt. Z-Man grabs a sleeper and gets the quick win.

Rating: C-. Z-Man looked good and that’s exactly what you need out of a debut match like this. The Assassin was nothing special and therefore a good choice for a jobber here. Z-Man would stick around for a few years and thankfully switch away from the sleeper, which really didn’t work for a high flier like him.

Z-Man would be paired with Brian Pillman in another young fast team. They would actually pick up the US Tag Team Titles from the Freebirds in early 1990. Here’s the rematch at Wrestlewar 1990.

US Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Brian Pillman/Z-Man

The Birds are challenging here. They get sent to the floor immediately and the champs steal their clothes and dance around as Badstreet plays in the background. Funny moment. The crowd is all over the Birds. They weren’t much in the ring but they were heat machines. Today is Flair’s birthday according to JR. We finally get going with Brian vs. Hayes. Brian knocks him around with a clothesline and Garvin fluffs his hair.

Speaking of Garvin here he is and he gets Z-Man. Z takes him down with a headlock but misses a dropkick. Garvin, ever the Rhodes Scholar, ducks his head and gets kicked in the face. Back to Brian for another headlock. Hayes comes back in and things are going slowly to start, implying that they have a lot of time to work with. Sunset flip with a great jump gets two for Pillman.

Z-Man works on the arm and goes into a Fujiwar Armbar to Hayes. Back to Garvin who loses any advantage that Hayes had gotten on Z-Man. Pillman comes in as the fans seem a bit distracted. Hayes comes in and hooks a sleeper (sleep hold according to Ross) as JR talks about Paul Boesch, the promoter of Houston Wrestling for decades, demonstrating this hold in the second World War.

Brian escapes and sends him into the corner but charges into a great left hand to put him down. Brian rolls through a cross body for two. Back to Garvin as this is going a lot longer than I was expecting it to go. Since Garvin can’t manage to keep Brian in one place he makes the tag to Z-Man. Z-Man puts the Z Lock (sleeper) on Hayes but Garvin comes off the top for the save.

Garvin hooks a chinlock as this match has gone well over fifteen minutes so far. Now they mix things up with a Hayes chinlock. After 18 minutes, we’re told this is a rematch from the finals of the tournament where Z-Man and Pillman won the titles in the first place. Z-Man gets a small package for two. Hayes is like enough of that and goes back to the chinlock. JR thinks Hayes looks like Alice Cooper. Terry wants to know if Hayes knows who Buffalo Bill is.

Hayes goes up and kind of steps off with no significant contact being made. Back to Garvin as this needs to end really soon. Who decided to give the Birds over twenty minutes? Top rope fist gets two for Hayes after a non-tag. Bulldog gets two as Pillman breaks it up. Back to the chinlock #4 but Zenk drops him with a DDT of his own. There’s the tag to Pillman and the fans care more than I expected them to. Pillman cleans house but Hayes brings in a title but Pillman comes off the top with a cross body as the title is being taken out to retain the titles.

Rating: D. Technically the match was fine but MY GOODNESS this ran long. It clocks in at almost twenty four minutes which is just far too long. Pillman and Zenk can easily go that long but the Birds were already through their whole set of stuff at about 10 minutes in. The solution of course? Go 14 minutes past that. WAY too long and if you cut this to like 12 minutes it’s probably an okish match.

Same idea but with the TV Title at Clash XIV.

TV Title: Z-Man vs. Bobby Eaton

Z-Man is defending and Eaton comes out to LOUD canned BOBBY chants instead of theme music. Feeling out process to start with both guys trading holds on the mat. Z-Man can’t hiptoss him down and we have another standoff. Eaton takes him down with an armbar to take over but goes up top and gets dropkicked out to the floor.

Back in and Z-Man cranks on the arm so Eaton pops him in the jaw and sends the champion into the buckle. Eaton goes up again but gets dropkicked out of the air to change momentum. Z-Man tries to speed things up but charges into an elbow in the corner. Eaton’s top rope knee drop gets two but Z-Man is too close to the ropes. A pair of rollups get two each for Z-Man before he backslides Eaton to retain the title. Replays show Eaton’s shoulder was up just before the pin but it doesn’t change anything.

Rating: C-. Z-Man wasn’t great in the ring but he was a good fast paced act that could make for an entertaining match. Eaton was still trying to find himself as a singles guy after the Midnights broke up but it would take a few more months. Z-Man had already lost the title to Arn Anderson but the title change hadn’t aired on television yet.

Z-Man’s biggest feud in WCW was against Steve Austin who had recently taken the TV Title from him. Here’s a rematch from Clash XVI.

TV Title: Z-Man vs. Steve Austin

Austin is defending and has the evil Lady Blossom with him. They fight up against the ropes to start and then take it into the corner for a little variety. Z-Man grabs a hammerlock and takes it to the mat but Austin is in the ropes pretty quickly. A shoulder puts the champion down but Z-Man doesn’t follow up for some reason. Another shoulder drops Austin again but they fight up against the ropes instead of anyone trying a pin.

Austin takes him down with a headlock but Z-Man counters into an armbar. Back up and Z-Man hits a superkick but Austin bails to the floor. Z-Man dives onto the ramp to take Austin down but misses a top rope cross body. We hit the chinlock on the challenger for a few moments before Z-Man fights up and charges into the Stun Gun. Austin doesn’t cover and gets small packaged for two before getting caught in the sleeper. Steve is quickly in the ropes where Lady Blossom gives him a foreign object to knock out Z-Man and retain the title.

Rating: D+. Much like some of the other matches tonight, this was pretty dull stuff. It was a lot of laying around and Austin bailing to the floor before getting in a single shot to cheat. It makes sense for Austin to run like that, but Z-Man not following up just stopped any momentum that he had going.

Z-Man would go after the Light Heavyweight Title against former partner Brian Pillman at Wrestlewar 1992.

Light Heavyweight Title: Flying Brian vs. Z-Man

This should be awesome. These two used to be the US Tag Champions. Jesse wants the cheating to start before the match even begins. I love heel announcers when they’re good at what they do and he’s one of the best of them. They keep doing the same stuff because they know each other so well. That’s an old tactic but it works very well no matter what so I can’t complain.

Crowd is oddly dead here, but I think it’s because there hasn’t been much to cheer for in about an hour. Jesse does some play by play here which is very different. Him basically drooling over the idea of a punch being thrown is great. This starts off pretty slowly but it’s going with the slow build as you can tell the ending is going to be awesome. Z-Man misses a Vader Bomb so Pillman can take over again.

And now it’s half crab time for no apparent reason. Pillman would soon join up with Austin to make the Hollywood Blondes who were as awesome as you can be in a 6 month reign as a team. A figure four goes on and Z-Man has a bad knee. They’re going with a more mat based and psychology heavy match here and it’s working rather well. The crowd is hot for it which is a good thing.

Z-Man can sell the knee work very well too. Crucifix, one of Pillman’s signature moves, gets two. Jesse is BEGGING for them to cheat. Z-Man gets a cross body but goes too high with it and nearly breaks Pillman’s neck (which more or less happened at last year’s Wrestle War which we’ll get to later) but it only gets two.

Both guys are down and more or less out. In a nice bit of psychology, Z-Man fakes a knee injury and kicks Pillman as he’s coming down in a cross body. Nice move out of Bret Hart’s book….although that might not have been written yet. Z-Man misses a missile dropkick and Pillman gets a rollup to retain. Nice ending.

Rating: B+. Another very good match here. Pillman was just awesome at this point and this was no exception. Excellent match here with two guys just going out there and having a blast. Z-Man was insane for the most part and it’s a shame because he was very good in the ring when he wasn’t ticked off. This was a great match with a mixture of a lot of styles. I can’t quite get it into the A range, but it’s well worth watching if you’re bored.

Without much success, Z-Man would be put into another pretty boy tag team with Johnny Gunn. Here they are in a six man at Halloween Havoc 1992.

Z-Man/Johnny Gunn/Shane Douglas vs. Arn Anderson/Michael Hayes/Bobby Eaton

This should be good. Gunn is more famous as Tom Brandi. So we have three guys who are young and muscular vs. a heat machine and two wrestling masters. We’re in Philadelphia. You can fill in the blanks yourselves. Gunn and Anderson start things off with Anderson pounding him into the corner. Gunn comes back with a bad dropkick and Z-Man hits one of his own. The good guys clear the ring and get booed out of the building.

Z-Man comes in legally and cranks on Arn’s arm until Bobby comes in to take over. Eaton pops him with a right hand and the place ERUPTS. Off to Hayes who gets cheered too because he’s the king of playing to a crowd. Shane comes in to work on Michael’s arm and is booed in the process, which isn’t something you would ever expect to see in Philly. Back to Eaton who is armdragged down immediately.

Eaton takes Shane into the corner and pops him with a right hand too, but he gets promptly taken down by a flying headscissors. Back to Z-Man who these people just hate. He hooks a leg bar as Jesse rants about Shane probably being a right wing Republican. Z-Man hooks a sleeper on Anderson but it’s quickly countered. Back to Hayes who pounds away and hooks a chinlock on Zenk. Eaton comes in but leaves quickly with a blind tag to Arn.

Anderson KILLS Z-Man with a clothesline and the place erupts again. Even Jesse is stunned by this and he doesn’t stun easily. Hayes hooks a rear chinlock but Zenk slams him into the mat to escape. Double tag brings in Shane vs. Anderson but Eaton cheap shots Douglas in the knee to stop the comeback, again getting a pop from the audience. Eaton drops a top rope knee drop onto the knee and hooks a Figure Four (with help from Hayes of course). Shane turns it over and atomic drops Anderson, but they hit heads. Hot tag to Gunn and everything breaks down with Gunn hitting a Thesz Press to pin Hayes. The booing is great.

Rating: C+. If this has been ANYWHERE other than Philadelphia, this would have been an excellent opener. I can’t say the fans turned on the good guys because they were never on their side in the first place. You had to know this was coming if you knew anything about the city, but the match itself was fine. Jesse’s reactions to the crowd were entertaining too as he sounded genuinely surprised.

We’ll wrap it up with Z-Man’s last big match in WCW at Slamboree 1993. This one needs a lot of explanation.


Tag Titles: Hollywood Blondes vs. Dos Hombres

This is in a cage. This is one of those angles that is so full of backstory it’s unreal. Ok so who in the world are Dos Hombres. Well they’re “luchadores” in masks. However, they’re introduced as Ricky Steamboat and Shane Douglas. Now one of them is Steamboat. The other however, isn’t Shane Douglas. It’s actually Tom Zenk. So in other words, we have a guy portraying Shane Douglas portraying a luchador who everyone “knows” is Shane wearing a mask.

Now that probably requires an explanation too. Steamboat and Douglas had been tag team champions and feuded with Brian Pillman/Barry Windham. Windham had to leave for some reason so they substituted in Steve Austin and made the team the Hollywood Blondes. They eventually won the titles and held them for like six months. Oh and these are UNIFIED tag titles, because the NWA thinks people still care about them because the NWA is stupid.

Anyway, the new champs beat the former champs time after time. They were scheduled to face Dos Hombres, some new team from Mexico, in what was supposed to be a squash. However, Dos Hombres started fighting like Douglas and Steamboat to the point that everyone said yeah that’s Steamboat and Douglas. They were even introduced by those names. Anyway, the thing is that Douglas had been fired and in the non-title match it was Brad Armstrong under the mask. In this match which is for the titles, it’s Tom Zenk. Got all that?

Despite this being in a cage they have to tag which gets annoying fast. Steamboat and Austin start but it’s off to Pillman very quickly. Yeah that’s Steamboat. You can tell those chops anywhere. Pillman can’t put him into the cage and there’s an armdrag. Off to “Shane” who is way too skinny to be who he’s portraying. There are two guys in suits that keep getting shown and I don’t know who they are.

Both “Shane” and Austin block head shots to the cage but Austin goes in back first just a bit. Both guys hit the ropes and Austin gets backdropped. Not much of a cage match here but a pretty good wrestling match up to this point. Austin eats cage in the first good shot into it. Back to Steamboat (I think) against Pillman who takes over. Yeah there’s an armdrag so it’s “Shane” who got tagged in.

Gorilla press puts Pillman’s back into the cage. Off to Austin who can’t do much because his back hurts from going into the cage. He gets caught in the Tree of Woe but from the top of the cage instead of the corner. The challengers do the camera thing that the Blondes are known for in a funny bit. Austin gets down and takes over again. I have no idea which Hombre is in there.

Middle rope elbow gets two for the future rattlesnake that has hair here. The Blondes have to hide the use of a towel. In a cage match? Pillman comes in and jumps into a boot to put both guys down. I think that’s “Shane” in there but I’m really not sure. They’re full body suits so you can’t tell them apart at all other than mannerisms. Austin cuts off the tag at the last second and we keep at it.

“Shane” gets a dropkick to send Austin into the cage. Oh yeah that’s a Steamboat shot from the apron. Austin blocks another tag with something like a spinebuster. Larry says that Austin can be a legend if his body holds up. Holy prognostication Larry! Rocket Launcher sends Brian into “Shane’s” ribs and they both down again. There’s the tag to Steamboat who cleans house. Austin tries to hide and there’s the Flair shot from him. You figure out what I mean by that and why the audience laughed at it.

Everything breaks down and Steamboat takes the mask off. He climbs the cage and takes out BOTH Blondes for two with a huge cross body! AWESOME! Even the bell goes off inadvertently and I can’t blame them. Steamboat DDTs Austin for two and does the same to Pillman. Stereo dropkicks get two. In a rushed but kind of sweet ending, the Hombres get the champs in opposite corners and whip them together but Pillman reverses and sends Steamboat into Austin who hits a Stun Gun to retain.

Rating: B. Good match, although I’m really not sure why it was inside a cage. Anyway, the point is that this was solid stuff as the Blondes were totally awesome throughout their entire run so this was pretty much an automatic good match. Zenk is good in the ring but he was in over his head with these guys. The backstory is a mess but it was still a breath of incredibly fresh air after watching the legends go at it for an hour.

Zenk is a guy that wasn’t the best worker in the world but he had a great look and could pass on his decent skills. However, to say he screwed up by running his mouth is an understatement. I can’t do them justice, but the rants he went on about backstage politics in WCW are some of the funniest things you’ll ever hear and I highly recommend looking them up.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Main Event – April 8, 2014: How The Mighty Have Fallen

Main Event
Date: April 8, 2014
Location: CajunDome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

This is a show I’ve wanted to do since I heard the main event announced at the Raw after Wrestlemania. The company was on fire at this point and they were smart enough to put a huge match on the Network to get people to watch. The main event of….well of Main Event is Shield vs. Wyatt Family III. Not bad for the C show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap from Raw where Shield turned face to save Bryan from the Authority. Everyone in the building knew that was coming and they went nuts for it anyway.

Opening sequence.

Shield vs. Wyatt Family

Now this is how you open a show. The fireflies aren’t a thing for Wyatt yet and it really does take something away from the entrance. Ambrose and Rowan get things going and Dean slaps the mask off his face. Rowan shoves him down but gets caught by a jumping back elbow to the jaw. Rollins comes in to help with a double suplex for two before hammering away on the big man. He even grabs Erick’s beard to take him into the corner. Why has no one ever thought of that before?

Rollins tries a crucifix but swings around and drags Erick down into a Koji Clutch. The other Wyatts come in for a save and we have a staredown. Back from a break with Bray hitting a gutbuster on Seth for two. Rowan comes in again and steps on Seth’s head before getting two off a belly to back suplex. Off to Harper who pulls Seth out of the corner, only to have him backflip to his feet and send Luke face first into the middle buckle.

The hot tag brings in Reigns to start cleaning house. It’s quickly off to Ambrose for a reverse 3D but Harper is up at two. A big boot takes Dean’s head off for two more and the Wyatts take over again. Dean tries biting Rowan’s finger but gets caught in a side slam for his efforts. Harper comes in and drives Ambrose back into the corner so the Family can keep hammering away.

Dean is sent to the ropes and tries to skin the cat but Rowan kicks him to the floor and we take another break. One of the commercials is for the Warrior DVD which still makes me shake my head given the news that would break about three hours later. Back with Harper Gator Rollins Ambrose but getting caught in a jawbreaker. Harper pops back up though and slams Dean down to stop a hot tag attempt.

Wyatt comes in to stay on the bad back before it’s off to Rowan for a bearhug. Dean fights out and grabs a sleeper, only to have Harper make a save. Some stiff uppercuts put Ambrose on the ropes but he finally comes back with the Rebound Clothesline. Bray stops another hot tag attempt but charges into a pair of boots in the corner. Dean goes up top, only to have Wyatt load up a superplex. That’s countered as well though and Dean tries a top rope ax handle but gets caught in a release Rock Bottom.

Rollins and Reigns come in for the save and everything breaks down again. Harper throws Reigns over the announcers’ table as Dean counters Sister Abigail into a rollup for a very close two. Ambrose scores with a DDT and makes the hot tag to Rollins. He dropkicks both minions to the floor and hits huge flip dives to knock them both down.

Back in and Seth is backdropped to the apron where he kicks Bray in the face and hits a standing Sliced Bread #2 for a near fall on Rowan. Ambrose breaks up a Harper powerbomb attempt but Bray knocks him outside. The Superman Punch drops Bray and Rollins kicks both monsters in the head. The Apron Kick drills Harper and Rollins hits the springboard knee to Rowan’s head, setting up the Dirty Deeds for the pin on Erick at 19:33.

Rating: A-. Great six man tag here as they went for the hot wrestling match instead of the war to give it a nice change of pace from the Elimination Chamber classic. These teams could have fought for years and it would have stayed awesome with the matches being this good. It’s awesome to see the Shield get a win, especially when they were coming off the huge turn the night before.

Ambrose faints after the match in a Flair Flip. Renee Young comes in for an interview and Rollins says no one can stop the team when they’re united. Ambrose starts coughing and says the others have to do the promo. Young asks about them saving Bryan and Ambrose says the Authority found out what happens when you test the Shield.

The Authority called them anonymous but Rollins insists they’re anything but that. Reigns hits on Renee a bit and asks the crowd if he has a name. He was the guy that speared HHH on Raw and he’s standing right here. Rollins talks about being prepared for war and calls the Authority the greatest injustice in WWE. They’ll fire the final shot and win this war. Believe that. DANG these guys were awesome.

Adam Rose is coming. He was always destined for comedy relief and there’s nothing wrong with that.

We see some of the mainstream coverage of the Streak ending.

Video on the history of Wrestlemania set to Celebrate by Kid Rock. This turns into a montage of WWE clips with maybe half of them being from Wrestlemania.

Thank You video for the fans. That’s still awesome.

Jack Swagger vs. Dolph Ziggler

Zeb rants about Cesaro turning on them last night, thus confirming his thoughts about immigrants. Ziggler nails a great dropkick to start but Jack takes him down and hits a quick Vader Bomb for two. Dolph comes back with a running cross body and some right hands in the corner, only to have Swagger chop block him down. Another Vader Bomb attempt hits boots but Jack grabs the Patriot Lock. That goes nowhere and Ziggler gets two off the Fameasser. The running DDT gets the same but Ziggler tries to get a bit too fast and is thrown into the Patriot Lock for the submission at 4:07.

Rating: C-. This was fast paced while it lasted but it didn’t have the time to go anywhere. I was expecting this to go on until the end of the show but I kind of like them having a third match instead. Swagger works a lot better as a face, even though he’s doing a lot of the same stuff.

Clip of Rusev debuting (again) last night.

Sin Cara vs. Alexander Rusev

Kick, slam, Accolade, 47 seconds. He would lose the Alexander in a few months.

Overall Rating: B+. Man it’s amazing how far WWE has fallen in the five months since Wrestlemania season. This was a hot show with a great opening match and some awesome videos that made me miss being at Wrestlemania. The six man is awesome and worth seeing, though it’s not quite as good as the Elimination Chamber match. Shield really could have gone on for a long time, but I can see why the were split. Imagine what happens when one of them needs help in a few years and you hear that music hit. Really good show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder – April 22, 1999: Let Them Be Awesome

Thunder
Date: April 22, 1999
Location: Orlando Arena, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 9,429
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

Welcome to the bottom of the cliff for WCW. On Nitro earlier this week we saw DDP turn heel for no apparent reason, Nash turn face after being one forever but then save Goldberg for no apparent reason and then Flair committed to a mental hospital for reasons of WCW being stupid. Hopefully a taped Thunder picks things up a bit. Let’s get to it.

The announcers run down the card, which actually doesn’t sound too bad. A six man between Benoit/Malenko/Kidman vs. Mysterio/Raven/Saturn sounds very appealing.

Hardcore Hak vs. Hugh Morrus

Morrus takes the kendo stick away and nails Hak to start as Larry is already ripping on the hardcore stuff. Now it’s trashcan lid time followed by a mop to Hak’s head. Hak comes back with a trashcan shot as Chastity starts handing in even more weapons. They head outside where Morrus reverses a whip into the barricade and nails Hak with another stick. Back in and Hak sends him face first into a chair because he doesn’t know how to do many regular wrestling moves. He draps Morrus over the top rope and drops a leg over his back before bringing in a table.

That’s not enough so he brings in a ladder but Morrus grabs a powerslam. No Laughing Matter connects for no cover. Hart comes in to set up two tables but Chastity sprays him with a fire extinguisher. The guys actually in the match climb the ladder with Morrus being shoved through the tables. Hak’s White Russian legsweep through the pieces of the table is enough for the pin.

Rating: N/A. That’s going to be my standard grade for this stuff going forward for the simple reason of this isn’t wrestling. Hak got over because of his entrance in ECW and that’s about the extent of his usefulness. This was a disaster and I believe Morrus was injured and out for a few weeks as a result of this. It doesn’t even have the stupid charm that ECW has half the time.

Video on Nash vs. Page.

We look at the Black and White attacking Konnan on Nitro.

Konnan vs. Scotty Riggs

Konnan hammers away at Riggs, sending him looking for his mirror. The bulldog and low dropkick have Riggs in even more trouble and Konnan fires off more punches in the corner. Back in and Scotty fires off punches of his own followed by an actually awesome dropkick. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Riggs elbows Konnan down to stop his comeback bid. After a Rick Rude hip swivel, Riggs suplexes him down but misses a top rope ax handle. Konnan kicks him in the ribs, hits the X Factor and hooks the Tequila Sunrise for the win.

Rating: D. Riggs’ continued employment astounds me but I’m assuming that dropkick has something to do with it. Konnan was his usual self here, even though he’s fallen through the floor ever since getting thrown out of the NWO. He’s just there anymore and doesn’t do anything but get on my nerves with his odd language.

Video on Flair vs. Piper.

Video on the awesome fourway from Monday.

Vampiro vs. Al Greene

They trade armbars to start until Vampiro grabs a full nelson. That goes nowhere either so Greene shoves him off and nails a shoulder. Greene takes him down but Vampiro rides him on the mat to send Al out to the floor. Vampiro hits a plancha and takes him back inside for some chops. This is already going nowhere. A suplex puts Vampiro down but he comes back up with a superkick and a high cross body. Instead of covering off that, Vampiro grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D+. The high spots helped a bit but this was only a step or two above the previous match. Vampiro really doesn’t hold up but at least he’s somewhat better as a face. On the other hand, it’s hard to hate someone named Big Al. Seriously, try it sometime. Anyway this was about what you would expect from this kind of match.

Hotline shill.

TV Title: Booker T. vs. Bobby Duncum Jr.

Booker is defending. Tenay offers condolences to Rick Rude’s family as Rick passed away two days earlier. They trade some headlocks and Booker gets taken into the corner for some kicks to the ribs. Booker fights back with some kicks and a clothesline to send Bobby out to the floor. Duncum pulls him to the floor though and ties Booker’s feet with his bullrope. Because he’s a cowboy you see, because WCW loves cowboys.

We take a break and come back with Bobby holding a chinlock. A big boot and belly to belly get two on Booker and we’re in the chinlock all over again. They head outside with Bobby having a pair of chairs taken away from him. Serves the cheater right. Back in and a top rope clothesline gets two for Duncum and we’re back to the chinlock. A clothesline puts Booker down for two more and it’s time for the bullrope again. Booker ducks a big swing and hits the ax kick and missile dropkick to retain.

Rating: C-. Duncum had a good look but being a cowboy is only going to take him so far. It gets dull watching a guy just carrying a rope and wearing a hat as the entirety of his gimmick. Booker is still doing well but he’s back in the same rut he’s been in for years with just having random matches that don’t lead anywhere.

Video on Bagwell calling out Steiner.

Buff Bagwell vs. Fit Finlay

After starting a USA chant, Buff takes him down with a quick armdrag to send Finlay out to the floor. Back in and Finlay nails him in the face with a European uppercut and slams Buff face first onto the apron. He tries to bring in a chair ala Duncum and has it taken away just like Bobby. Back in and Finlay pulls on Buff’s nose (seriously) but Buff fights up with a jawbreaker. They trade slams and Buff nails a headbutt but walks into a knee to the ribs. Another European uppercut staggers Buff and the rolling fireman’s carry gets two. Buff stops a charging Finlay in the corner with a boot and nails the Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: D+. They’re firmly in the “here’s wrestling” mode tonight with no real emotion or energy to anything. Buff’s face run continues to work well enough, but he’s only a little bit ahead of Scotty Riggs as far as in ring abilities. Finlay was his usual good self but he didn’t have much to work with here.

This Week in WCW Motorsports.

We look at Flair being committed on Monday.

Disco Inferno vs. Rick Steiner

After a commercial for some reason, Rick quickly kicks Disco out to the floor before choking him down in the corner. More punching and choking ensues as this is all Steiner so far. Some kicks send Disco running out to the floor out of fear for this boring match. Back in and Disco nails the swinging neckbreaker and a middle rope elbow. He goes up again but dives into a belly to belly suplex. A regular suplex sets up the Steiner Bulldog followed by a kind of STF to make Disco tap.

Rating: D-. Total squash here and the rise of Rick Steiner begins. This is another one of those things in 1999 that really makes me shake my head as Rick would get worse and worse in the ring and get higher and higher on the card as a result. Disco got in almost nothing here and might as well have been from In The Corner To My Left.

We look at Page embracing the dark side to end Nitro.

Goldberg vs. Ernest Miller

Miller offers him the five count but kicks Goldberg at two. Some kicks have Goldberg staggered but he just punches Miller in the face. Sonny Onoo tries to interfere but Goldberg gorilla presses him at Miller and immediately spears both of them down in a cool looking spot. Jackhammer ends this quick.

Kidman/Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko vs. Rey Mysterio Jr./Raven/Saturn

Main event time and Kidman doesn’t look thrilled with his partners. The three teams are scheduled for a triangle match at Slamboree which sounds awesome. Robinson is guest referee of course. Mysterio and Malenko get things going with Rey hammering away in the corner. An armdrag takes Malenko down and we get a standoff. Off to Raven vs. Kidman with the bird enthusiast driving shoulders in the corner.

Raven crotches him on the top rope and Saturn nails a missile dropkick to put Kidman on the floor. A plancha nails Kidman on the floor as Mysterio protests. The argument allows Kidman to tag in Malenko for a dropkick to Saturn’s knee. Dean chokes away and Kidman is hesitant to come in under such circumstances. Saturn’s powerbomb attempt is countered but Raven breaks up a Shooting Star attempt.

That’s fine with Saturn as he belly to belly superplexes the crotched Kidman across the ring. Off to Raven for an atomic drop but Kidman sends him into the corner and tags out to Dean. Raven and Saturn take over on Malenko just as easily before tagging in Mysterio for a dropkick. Malenko suplexes Rey down and we take a break.

Back with everyone in the same spot due to the wonders of taped shows. Saturn has a red headdress for no apparent reason. Benoit goes after Rey’s knee, drawing in Saturn for an attempted save. That’s exactly what the Horsemen want as they switch behind the referee’s back to keep control. Dean gets two off a suplex and brings in Kidman who tries to help Rey up.

Benoit will have none of this compassion stuff and tags himself so he can throw Kidman to the floor. A superplex drops Rey again as the Horsemen keep control. Dean throws Mysterio outside and everything breaks down. That goes nowhere as Malenko takes Rey back inside and bends Mysterio’s back over his knee.

Rey finally takes Malenko down with the sitout bulldog and makes the tag to Saturn. Everything breaks down again with Rey tagging himself back in after a few seconds. Kidman clotheslines Malenko “by mistake” but Anderson crotches Rey on the top. The spinebuster plants Rey and Kidman protests, but Dean dropkicks Kidman onto Mysterio for a fast count pin.

Rating: B-. Take six guys and give them about fifteen minutes to be awesome. It wasn’t a classic but it blew away everything else on this show. This likely sets up some tension between the Tag Team Champions as we head into Slamboree. That match is going to rock given the talent in the ring. Good main event here.

Overall Rating: D+. The main event brings this up a good bit as everything else was basic, boring stuff that didn’t need to exist. At the end of the day though, I’ll take dull, generic wrestling over stuff that insults my intelligence, making this show a bit more tolerable than the worst of Nitro. It’s also a step up over some of the worst Thunders they’ve had over the last few months.

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