A bit of a surprise.

Team 3D. I can live with this, though the real life stuff keeping AJ and Jarrett out continue to keep this from having the required members.

I wish I was clever enough to think of this.

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One of the biggest shows of the year is tomorrow and I don’t think a lot of people care.

Since MVP is injured and can’t wrestle, the main event has been changed to a three way in the cage, because wrestling NEEDS triple threats. Eric Young will still be defending, but his opponents will be determined. Instead of selecting a challenger, the winners of two previously announced matches will be entered in to face Young.

The first qualifying match is Samoa Joe vs. Bobby Lashley. This is the more interesting one of the two and I think they’ll keep Lashley strong, even though Joe presents a more interesting case to be champion. Unfortunately this is TNA, so Joe has to look strong one week and then get beaten a few days later.

The other qualifier is Austin Aries vs. Kenny King. I’ll take Aries here, even though it looks like they’re setting up Young to overcome the odds again and keep the title over the other two members of the Trio.

In case it’s not clear, I’ll take Young to keep the title. Odds are they’ll put the title on someone else at Destination X anyway.

Two of the Von Erich children are having a tag match. This hasn’t been advertised on TV much if at all, but if they did we might have to cut out one of 19 segments a given act got o a show. Their opponents are to be announced, but could it possibly be anyone other than the Bro Mans? Von Erichs win.

Ethan wins the Texas Death Match due to Dixie causing trouble. She has to go through a table in New York. I mean…..she HAS TO.

Magnus beats Willow, setting up a tag match with Abyss joining Hardy to face the Brits in the future.

Storm beats Anderson but they’ll have 97 gimmick matches in the future to keep the feud going way past its expiration date.

Love beats Kim and I don’t care enough to go into why.

The other match that hasn’t been announced on Impact: Sanada vs. Manik vs. Tigre Uno vs. Crazy Steve vs. Eddie Edwards vs. Davey Richards for the X-Division Title. We’re less than two weeks away from Destination X and the X Division Title match can’t even get a backstage promo. Is it any wonder why this company is in such horrible shape?

Overall Slammiversary looks like the most thrown together PPV in a long time. The main event isn’t their fault, but too much of the card is either tacked on or a match that hasn’t been given enough time for people to care about it. The show should set up some interesting stuff in the future with Destination X so soon but instead it feels like they’re just filling time until we can get back to the multi way war for control of the company. Then again, Slammiversary has been a very solid show for a few years running now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Survivor Series at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: January 21, 1999
Location: Market Square Arena, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re on the way towards SuperBrawl and the latest Hogan vs. Flair showdown. Nitro saw a few stories being set up for the pay per view with the second biggest one being Luger/Nash vs. Konnan/Mysterio. The Wolfpack has decided they want Mysterio’s mask to prove how big and tough they are. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the David Flair story up to this point, including him knocking Bischoff out to shave his head on Monday.

The announcers show us clips from Souled Out with David Flair getting a beatdown.

Stevie Ray and the NWO B Team nearly get into an argument over being worthless. The Red and Black have sent them a note saying their private jet is stuck in Tampa due to bad weather. Horace and Brian Adams say they flew coach out of Tampa and never heard about a private jet.

Jerry Flynn vs. Disco Inferno

A clothesline puts Flynn down to start but he comes back with a series of kicks in the corner. More kicks have Disco in trouble but he snaps Jerry’s throat across the top rope. The dancing middle rope elbow and a swinging neckbreaker set up a chinlock. Tony wants to know where Hall is, despite the letter covering that in the previous segment. Jerry’s cross armbreaker is quickly broken and it’s time for more dancing. A spinning kick to the head puts Disco down again and a belly to belly gets two. Flynn misses another spinkick though and it’s the Chartbuster for the pin. The fans are into Disco a little bit.

Rating: D. It’s a Jerry Flynn match so I don’t know what else you would expect. Disco is starting to get over again with his goofy antics despite cheating to win all the time. That actually makes sense though, as it’s hard to boo a comedy character, even if he’s doing something heelish.

Back to the B Team locker room where Horace and Norton are playing with walkie talkies. That’s the whole segment.

After a break and the B Team is still arguing. Vincent calls Hogan but only gets voicemail. That’s a step above Orndorff in 1986 at least. Vincent tries Nash but an argument ensues with Stevie over who leads the team.

A limo has arrived so Horace goes to greet them. The Horsemen are inside instead and beat Horace down while Flair walks into the building. Mongo beats him up with what appears to be a vacuum.

Flair is in the ring for a chat with Gene. First up, Ric starts the tournament for the Tag Team Titles, even though they should be two weeks in. The finals are at SuperBrawl. Now the jacket comes off so it’s time to get serious. Flair rants about Hollywood keeping great talent in his shadow for twenty years. When Flair was in Kansas wrestling Rufus Jones in Kansas, Hogan was wrestling fourth on the card in Madison Square Garden. While Flair was with Harley Race and Ricky Steamboat, Hogan was in Hollywood making movies.

He brings up Hogan beating up David and promises to prove that he’s the real world champion next month. Guys like Jericho and Chavo Guerrero grew up wanting to be like Flair. That’s why it’s Flair’s reputation against Hogan’s fame. Flair may only have power for ninety days (even though it’s been nearly a month already) but at SuperBrawl, he’ll get what’s his.

This promo was the usual passionate speech from Flair, but it shows part of the problem with the feud and a lot of what Flair talked about in general. As a fan, why should I care about Flair having a match in Kansas twenty years ago against a guy that I’ve only heard of either in his promos or from a tape that’s ten years old if I’m under twenty years old? Odds are I’ve never seen the matches other than maybe some of his stuff with Steamboat.

I’m sure there are some fans at the time who had seen a bunch of those matches and care for them, but it’s not exactly the best way to get the masses to care. Granted that might be because Flair led with Rufus Jones instead of Steamboat or Race, who far more people would care about.

Instead, Flair is the grandfather that says rambles on and on about how much better things were back in his day while his grandkids roll their eyes and tune him out. He may be right, but the way he talks doesn’t help anything and makes me feel like he’s talking down to me more than making a good point about Hogan. What he said about his own career makes sense, but it doesn’t make Hogan look bad because he was in New York for a lot of his career.

Thankfully the feud is much more about Hogan beating up Flair’s son because that’s a much better reason to hate Hogan. The rest works in theory but it’s mainly giving me flashbacks to all the fun matches that Hogan had and putting Eye of the Tiger in my head, which isn’t going to make me boo Hogan.

The B Team is in the back and Horace’s knee is in bad shape. He’s also lost his shirt and Vincent is more concerned about getting him a new one.

We look at Jericho making sure Saturn wears a dress at all times he’s in the arena.

Al Green vs. Perry Saturn

The dress is red this week. Saturn: “Life’s a drag.” They lock up to start but Saturn trips up on the dress and falls to the mat. An elbow drop gets two for Al and that’s about the extent of his offense. Saturn comes back with a superkick and a throw before stomping away in the corner. A guillotine legdrop sets up the Death Valley Driver to complete the glorified squash.

We see some old clips of Raven at home and getting annoyed at his family.

Glacier vs. Kenny Kaos

Kaos gets kicked in the ribs to start but takes Glacier down into an ankle lock. A rope is quickly grabbed and Glacier comes back with more kicks and punches in the corner. Kaos knocks him out of the air and hits a clothesline to stagger the ice dude. A springboard clothesline is enough to give Kaos the pin.

Rating: D. I’m still trying to get my head around Kaos being half of the World Tag Team Champions. It’s just such a random choice and doesn’t seem to have served much of a purpose. He still comes off like a jobber and isn’t any more interesting than he was when he got the belt. The feud with Rage seems to be forgotten as well.

Back to the B Team for a big surprise: Vincent reveals a Red and Black shirt after the rest of the group goes to find the Horsemen. This is supposed to be a big deal.

Here’s the B Team in the ring because we’re supposed to care about them due to the shirts they’re wearing. Horace, despite having a bad knee earlier, walks to the ring fine but is holding his ribs. Vincent comes out last and gets a mic. Oh dear this could be bad. Vincent says that Horace and Adams will be in the tournament. Tonight, it’s Norton/Stevie/Vincent vs. the Horsemen if they have the guts. The other members aren’t cool with this for some reason.

Booker T. vs. Norman Smiley

Smiley goes to the ropes for an early break but is quickly sent to the floor. Back in and Norman takes over with some shots to the face but walks into Booker’s flying forearm. The Horsemen have accepted the NWO’s challenge. Norman kicks him down again and loads up the Big Wiggle but isn’t ready to dance yet. The spinning slam gets a mini dance and we hit the chinlock.

They head outside with Norman chopping away before taking it back inside for a belly to back suplex. Smiley stays down too until he backflips to his feet for the Big Wiggle. He slaps Booker in the face but walks into a powerslam. The Harlem Side Kick and 110th Street Slam get two for Booker and Norman rolls to the floor again. Norman is sent into the barricade and then back inside for the ax kick. Booker goes up for the missile dropkick but Norman rolls outside and takes the countout.

Rating: C. The match was ok but the ending brings it down. However, the important thing to this match is how we arrived here. Both guys have been on hot streaks and then they were put against each other in a match that wasn’t easy to predict. That’s old school booking and can set up some interesting matches. Unfortunately it’s nothing that’s done very often anymore.

We look at Scott Steiner harassing the Nitro Girls.

This Week in WCW Motorsports! Again, the car didn’t do badly but didn’t win.

After a break, here’s the EXACT SAME SCOTT STEINER CLIP.

World Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Brian Adams/Horace vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr./Kidman

Horace, now totally fine, stomps away on Kidman in the corner to start before bealing him across the ring. Kidman comes back with right hands in the corner and a dropkick before it’s off to Chavo, who is almost immediately low bridged down to the floor. Adams throws him up over the top rope and back inside. Chavo’s cross body is caught in mid air but Kidman dropkicks Guerrero’s back to put Adams down.

The small guys do some nice double teaming to get two more on Adams but Kidman walks into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to change control again. We take a break and come back with Kidman walking the corner to bulldog Horace and make the tag to Chavo. Some dropkicks stagger the NWO members but Horace kicks him in the face to take over again. Another tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Guerrero and it’s back to Horace.

Kidman and Vincent get in a fight on the floor as the announcers mention that this is a double elimination tournament. That’s quite the information to leave out for most of a match. Then again I can’t imagine the tournament has been mapped out at all at this point. Kidman gets the hot tag and everything breaks down, allowing Vincent to hit Kidman with the slap jack to give Adams the pin.

Rating: C-. Good match messed up by another bad finish. The NWO B Team isn’t exactly something that makes me care as even their teammates treat them like they’re nothing. It doesn’t help that neither of these teams have any real chance to win the titles. You have to have filler like this, but it would be nice to have it be anyone but the Black and White.

MORE B Team stuff with Vincent congratulating the winners but getting yelled at for stealing the slap jack. Then they yell at him for the shirt he’s wearing.

La Parka vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Rey dropkicks La Parka down to start and avoids a charge in the corner to keep things going. La Parka backdrops him to the apron and stops to dance but is still able to catch Rey in mid air. He puts Rey on the top rope but gets caught by a hurricanrana, followed by a second one from the top to the floor.

Back in and La Parka slams him face first down for two and a kick to the chest gets the same. La Parka goes up but dives into Rey’s boots. He misses a charge into the post as well but is still able to crotch Rey on top. Mysterio gets launched face first into the buckle and La Parka goes up again. This time he’s the one getting crotched and Rey hits something like La Mistica for the pin.

Rating: C. This was better and had a surprising finish as Rey usually uses a huricanrana or some kind of rollup. La Parka didn’t look bad either, which is the case for almost all of the luchadores: if you give them time to show off in the ring, they can give you a pretty good match. It helps that he was in there against Mysterio of course.

Here’s an upset DDP with something to say. He isn’t cool with what Scott Steiner did to his wife on Monday. Page is used to men hitting on Kimberly but he didn’t like the things he was seeing. Kimberly wants to handle Steiner herself, but Page isn’t letting that happen. If Steiner wants a freak, Page will be his hook up.

The B Team is STILL arguing because Stevie is on the phone. The rest of the team goes to the ring for their match and Vincent tries to drink raw eggs ala Rocky. He spits it out but finds a hidden security camera. The Red and Black is shown watching from what looks like a limo. Hogan says they know what time it is. So if they were never at the building, who put in the camera?

Ric Flair/Chris Benoit/Steve McMichael vs. Vince/Stevie Ray/Scott Norton

It’s now Vince, despite being Vincent all night long. Steve and Stevie get things going for a power match but it’s quickly off to Vince. Mongo sticks out his chin so Vince can have a free shot, and that’s exactly what he does, taking over with kicks to the ribs. Vince gets taken into the corner for chops by Benoit and a big one takes him down. Norton comes in and gets chopped as well before it’s back to Mongo. McMichael gets powerslammed down but Vince misses a middle rope elbow. The hot tag brings in Flair who goes after the leg and everything breaks down. The Horsemen clean house and the Figure Four makes Vince give up.

Rating: D+. This was almost a squash with nothing at all happening. Thankfully Mongo would be gone soon as he’s somehow regressing despite barely having any skill at all in the first place. The guy just wasn’t that good and it showed really badly over the years. At least this was short.

Benoit crossfaces Vince to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade as there’s good enough wrestling and some passable stories, but the stakes are so low with the B Team being the focus of everything. Other than that, the wrestling was watchable but it’s really hard to care when you know this is going to mean nothing in the long run.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Survivor Series at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown
Date: June 13, 2014
Location: Resch Center Arena, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the day of bad luck but things haven’t been that bad in WWE as of late. The big story coming out of Monday is Daniel Bryan being stripped of the WWE Title due to his neck injury, meaning the ladder match at Money in the Bank is now for the title. Allegedly there’s going to be a second ladder match announced for the traditional briefcase, but if they don’t announce something by Monday I can’t picture it happening. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of HHH and Stephanie stripping Bryan of the title before announcing the ladder match for the title.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Shield to open things up. Ambrose says it’s clear that the Authority is trying to stack the deck against them. Well listen up kiddo: they’re flipping the table over and coming for HHH’s throat. As for his former business partner Seth Rollins, his business will be shut down for good. Reigns says Orton better enjoy his vacation because after Roman gets his hands on him, Orton will be on a permanent vacation. Maybe one of them will be the next WWE Champion.

HHH pops up on screen and says there are only a handful of spots in the ladder match and he’s only got one slot available. Therefore, he flips a coin and it’s Ambrose getting a qualifying match later tonight. His opponent: Bray Wyatt. Also, the Wyatts and Reigns will be banned from ringside, and Ambrose is banned from ringside for the next match.

Roman Reigns vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title. Roman takes him into the corner to start and gets two off a floatover suplex. Barrett fights back with some forearms but gets sent to the floor with a big clothesline as we take a break. Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock but missing a charge into the corner, allowing Barrett to hammer away even more. Reigns fights out of another chinlock and hits a Samoan drop to get a breather. Some clotheslines set up the running apron dropkick and Barrett is in trouble. The Superman Punch connects but 3MB breaks up the spear for the DQ at 8:25.

Rating: C. The match was pretty much exactly what it was supposed to be and the ending makes perfect sense. It’s also going to lead to a fitting final night for Mahal and McIntyre as they’re about to be destroyed by Reigns. Also, see how easy it is to protect a champion and avoid an unnecessary loss? Why can’t they do that more often?

Mahal is thrown over the table, McIntyre is speared and Slater is speared out of the air so Reigns can stand tall.

Erick Rowan vs. Jey Uso

This is the second round of singles matches after Jimmy beat Harper on Main Event. Rowan charges to start but is quickly sent to the floor for the big dive. Back in and Jey avoids a splash and hammers away but is easily thrown off the middle rope. A modified side slam (basically a Rock Bottom with the arm around Jey’s waist) gets the pin for Rowan out of nowhere at 1:40.

Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth

Bo dances to Truth’s music for a funny visual. Truth does the pelvic thrust to start and Bo isn’t sure what to make of it. Bo gets thrown down again and is a bit flustered for the first time. He nails a right hand and defends it by saying Truth attacked him. Some knees to the face get two for Bo and it’s off to a cravate. Truth makes a quick comeback with the gordbuster for two but Bo avoids the ax kick. The Bodog makes Bo 7-0 at 2:57, which the announcers treat as something that matters.

Cesaro and Heyman say that Cesaro will be fighting tonight and win by technical knockout when the referee has to stop the match.

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Non-title. Cesaro takes him into the corner to start but Sheamus fights back with right hands of his own. A kick to the face staggers Sheamus and Cesaro keeps pounding away in the corner. Sheamus blocks a suplex into one of his own though and the Irishman takes over. More big right hands have Sheamus in trouble but he gets belly to backed to change momentum again. Sheamus nails a Cactus Clothesline and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro nailing another knee to the head, only to be sent to the apron for the ten forearms. He’s able to fight out though, so Sheamus just hits him in the face to send it back to the floor. That’s fine with Cesaro as he pulls Sheamus off the apron and down onto the floor. Back in again and Cesaro hits some double stomps for two before bending Sheamus’ back around the ropes. More right hands have Sheamus in trouble but he says bring it on. Cesoar keeps hammering but gets sent back out to the floor.

Back in again and Sheamus hits his running knee lift to set up the ten forearms and the Irish Curse for two. White Noise is countered into Swiss Death for two but Sheamus still says bring it on. Cesaro hits him with every strike he can, only to get ax handled to the face and caught by the rolling fireman’s carry. Cesaro grabs the ropes to avoid the powerslam and counters into a small package with the tights for the pin at 14:40. That’s the same finish (minus the tights) from Payback.

Rating: B-. This was the usual good match between these two but I’m getting a bit tired of seeing them together. I do like the finish carrying over from the last match for the sake of continuity and the lack of a last second Brogue Kick is always a plus. It was entertaining too so it’s hard to really complain about this one.

After look back at the opening segment, Bray Wyatt talks about dreaming of glory as a child. He dreamed of a nice house on a hill with a white picket fence. He dreamed of happiness. Then he woke up and realized he was still stuck in this rotten world just like the rest of it. Abigail heard and told him that he would achieve everything he dreamed of and more. They will chant his name and bow down to him, and that’s the predicament he’s in now. Above that ladder lies his happy anding and his power. Unfortunately for Dean Ambrose, he stands in Bray’s way and will burn. Follow the buzzards.

On Main Event, Layla poured kitty litter and milk on Summer Rae to even the score from Monday.

Adam Rose vs. Fandango

Rose avoids a jump in the corner and gives Fandango a spank. The dancer takes him down and gets two off a suplex, only to have Rose roll away before Fandango can try the guillotine legdrop. Party Foul gets the pin at 1:45.

Post match Rose’s chicken gets in the ring and removes it’s beak to reveal Summer Rae. The catfight is on until Fandango saves his chick. Summer is actually working in this role.

Jack Swagger vs. Big E.

Swagger quickly sends Big E. out to the floor and takes his head off with a clothesline. Back in and Swagger pounds away but gets backdropped over the top and out to the floor. Big E. hits his clotheslines and the belly to belly followed by the Warrior Splash. Lana comes out for a distraction before the Big Ending, allowing Swagger to boot Big E.’s head off. Colter yells at Lana to get rid of her, but the Vader Bomb is countered with the Big Ending for the pin at 2:57. Colter yelling at Lana could lead to something, but so much for the ANGRY Swagger push.

Aksana vs. Alicia Fox

Aksana slaps her and nails some clotheslines to start before a snap suplex gets two. The release spinebuster gets two more but Fox comes back with her northern lights suplex. We hit the chinlock on Aksana followed by something like a snap Fameasser to a kneeling Aksana for the pin at 2:25.

The Raw ReBound looks at Rollins’ explanation.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Bray Wyatt vs. Dean Ambrose

It’s a brawl to start until Dean hits a cross body for two. He rakes Bray’s eyes across the ropes and hits his dropkick against the ropes to knock Bray outside. Ambrose dives over the top rope but gets caught in a release Rock Bottom against the apron. Back from a break with Bray working over the arm.

Ambrose escapes the suplex slam though and hits a DDT to get a breather. The bad arm is sent into the post though and Bray gets two off some headbutts. Off to a nerve hold but Bray misses the running backsplash. Dean goes to the apron but sends Bray into the buckle with one good arm. After fighting off a superplex attempt, Dean jumps into the release Rock Bottom but elbows his way out again.

Bray knocks him into the ropes but Dean bounces off the ropes with a clothesline for two. Ambrose says bring it on and charges at Wyatt in the corner. Bray goes outside but gets taken down by a running suicide dive. Back in and Dean hits his missile dropkick for two but the bulldog driver is easily broken up. Wyatt hits his running cross body but the suplex slam is countered into a small package. Now the bulldog driver connects but Seth Rollins is on the announcers’ table. Dean goes after him but Seth goes into the ring, sending Dean into Sister Abigail for the pin at 14:22.

Rating: B. This was getting good but it never hit that top level. I’m not wild on Bray wanting to be World Champion as he comes off more like a 1992 Cactus Jack, where he should only care about causing chaos rather than being champion. It’s an interesting idea though and Bray being champion wouldn’t be a stretch at this point.

Overall Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill Smackdown: the long matches were good enough, nothing was too terrible and there’s absolutely nothing that you need to see here at all. If you have nothing else to do, Smackdown isn’t the worst way to spend two hours, but you’d be better off throwing on an old show on the Network. That could be the same reaction to the show every week anymore.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Bad News Barrett via DQ when 3MB interfered
Erick Rowan b. Jey Uso – Side slam
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Bodog
Cesaro b. Sheamus – Small package
Adam Rose b. Fandango – Party Foul
Big E. b. Jack Swagger – Big Ending
Alicia Fox b. Aksana – Fameasser
Bray Wyatt b. Dean Ambrose – Sister Abigail

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Survivor Series at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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This was expected for awhile.  They don’t have a ton of options, but maybe they swap in Lashley and bring Bobby Roode back in to fill in a spot.  It’s the danger of the taping schedule but there’s not much else they can do.  Unfortunately this probably means more Eric Young as champion.

Today is someone who isn’t really a wrestler but has had enough matches to make an entry. It’s Easy E himself, Eric Bischoff.

I’ll be jumping over quite a bit as Bischoff doesn’t have a ton of matches to pick from.

There will actually be more stories here than usual as Bischoff didn’t wrestle often but it was a big deal when he did. We’ll start at Starrcade 1997, in a battle for control of Nitro.

Eric Bischoff vs. Larry Zbyszko

With Bret Hart as guest referee. This should have been Hall vs. Larry, as those two had been talking trash to each other for months. However, Larry only gets Hall if he beats Eric here tonight. If Eric wins, the NWO controls Nitro. Larry is in good shape here considering he’s 46 and hasn’t wrestled regularly in about five years. Bret checks them for weapons and we’re ready to go. Bischoff has the body of a 15 year old girl. He is however a black belt in karate so you can expect a lot of striking.

Bischoff hits a quick shot to Larry’s head and immediately celebrates. More strikes follow and Eric heads out to the floor for consultation with Hall. Back in and Larry hits some shots of his own and Eric is scared. Larry goes after him again and Eric hits a spin kick to the side of the head that knocks Larry down. That’s enough for Zbyszko and he charges at Eric and takes him down to the mat. Bret admonishes him for pulling Eric’s hair, so Larry puts on a sleeper and a headscissors, both of which are broken up for being chokes.

Off to a standing figure four but Eric quickly makes a rope. The damage is done though and Larry goes after the leg. Makes sense against a karate guy. Bret keeps Larry away from Eric and the announcers PANIC. Imagine that: a referee following the rules. Eric is sent into the steps and takes a brief walk around the ring. Back in and Bret blocks a right hand from Larry, allowing Eric to get in a kick to the head. Bischoff fires more kicks with Larry on the ropes, although Bret is fine with them.

Eric is starting to kick himself out though as the kicks are getting weaker and weaker each time. Now he fires rights and lefts in the corner as Larry is just covering up. Eric can barely move now and Larry shakes everything off. A suplex puts Bischoff down and Larry ties him in the Tree of Woe. Hall pulls something out of his pocket and loads it into Eric’s shoe, WITH BRET LOOKING RIGHT AT THEM. I mean, he knows what’s going on so why not LOOK THE OTHER WAY???

Anyway, Eric kicks him in the head with the loaded foot and the piece of metal goes flying. Bret isn’t supposed to see it, despite watching it fly through the air. Eric celebrates, so Bret hits both Bischoff and Hall before putting Hall in the Sharpshooter, which is Bret’s version of the Scorpion Deathlock. Larry chokes Eric for a bit and is declared the winner, presumably by DQ.

Rating: F. This was in the second to last spot on the biggest show of the year and featured the boss of the company who has no skill whatsoever in the ring. Larry did fine all things considered, but to waste this spot on this match and to waste BRET HART’s in ring debut on this match is absolutely ridiculous in every sense of the word.

Then in the summer of 1998, Bischof and Hollywood Hogan took over the Tonight Show, setting up a showdown tag match at Road Wild 1998.

Jay Leno/Diamond Dallas Page vs. Eric Bischoff/Hollywood Hogan

Thank goodness they don’t have another video package to set this up. The one good thing about this: Liz ROCKING some jeans and chaps. Leno is apparently here to defend his title as King of Late Night. Kevin Eubanks is at ringside. Leno throws water at Hogan and Bischoff on the floor to show how serious he is. Hogan and Page start (thank goodness) and we get the usual non-action headlined by a wristlock.

Page drives in the shoulders and hits a big right hand, knocking Hogan into a left hand from Leno. Hogan is sent to the floor and the ripped Kevin Eubanks sends him into the post. Leno leads a chant against Hogan and is at least into the match. Bischoff comes in and Jay tries to go after him but gets held back. Page shrugs off some kicks to the chest and it’s off to Leno. Bischoff runs away to Hogan and Jay stays in. He points at his chin and makes fun of Hogan’s baldness which is about what you would expect. Leno avoids a pair of right hands and tags in Page.

Hogan clotheslines Page down and it’s back to the driving shoulders. Leno comes back in to grab the wrist and in one of the most painful things I can remember seeing as a wrestling fan, Hogan sells it. He wouldn’t sell for Sting at Starrcade but he’s selling for Jay Leno. Hogan shoves him into the corner and drives in a knee but Leno grabs the wrist again. A double clothesline puts Hogan down and Leno gets two before nearly collapsing into a tag to Page. Ok to be fair to Leno, he did his job and was actually trying. Points for that.

The wrestlers head to the floor and Eubanks steals a chair from Hogan to keep Page in control. Back in and Bischoff gets in a kick to the back of Page’s head to change momentum. Bischoff gets in his shots to make himself feel important before Hogan gets in a shot with a foreign object to give Eric a two count. There’s the big boot but Page gets up before the legdrop and takes Hogan down with the discus lariat.

Leno gets the hot tag and we get the showdown with Bischoff…..who drops Leno with a poke to the eye. Jay comes back with a low blow and some right hands before sending Bischoff into some buckles. Leno is totally gassed and everything breaks down. Hogan hits Bischoff by mistake and Eubanks hits a very good looking Diamond Cutter on Bischoff to give Leno the pin.

Rating: D. Of course that’s on an adjusted scale. This match wasn’t horrible but it was incredibly stupid. Again I’d like to reiterate that Leno did his job to the best of his ability. He did his comedy stuff, took a few shots from Hogan and got the pin on Bischoff. He was bad, but you knew that was going to happen as soon as this was announced. As for the booking, there were a bunch of other ideas they could have gone with here and this was probably the worst possible outcome.

You could have gone with the Battle of the Billionaires idea with Leno backing Page against Hogan in a singles match and done the showdown with Bischoff that way. You could have swapped in Goldberg for Page and done Goldberg vs. Hogan II with the same Leno vs. Bischoff outside stuff. Do that and put Page in the battle royal to get Goldberg’s next challenger. You could have done any of those things and gotten a better result, but it wouldn’t be WCW if they had gone that way.

Here’s one of Bischoff’s most famous moments. Back in 1998, Bischoff suspended Ric Flair for missing a Thunder taping and the fans were LIVID. After about four months of chanting WE WANT FLAIR, Bischoff allowed him to come back for possibly the best moment on Nitro. They argued for awhile and this is the result. From Starrcade 1998.

Ric Flair vs. Eric Bischoff

Bischoff immediately heads to the floor but Flair gets his hands on him against the barricade. The beating is on quickly and they head inside for some choking in the corner. There’s the knee drop to the head and a right hand, which Flair says is for his wife. Ric goes after the knee in the corner but Bischoff gets in a kick to the head that knocks Flair all the way to the floor. He sends Flair into the barricade as Tony gets in the semi-infamous line about how anyone that follows tournament karate knows that Bischoff is a force in that sport.

Flair is busted open as Eric hammers away in the corner. Ric Hulks Up but another kick to the head puts him right back down. It’s nothing that a low blow won’t stop though as Flair takes over. Two more low blows put Eric in the corner and Ric chops away before shoving the referee down. Shattered Dreams has Bischoff screaming and a pair of suplexes make it even worse. The Figure Four goes on but here’s Curt Hennig to nail Flair with an object, giving Bischoff the pin, thereby killing the audience deader than dead. I mean they go SILENT.

Rating: F. For failure. That’s what this match was: a complete failure. This match went against the basic idea of wrestling: the villain runs his mouth and then gets beaten down by the hero at the end of the day. How does this help anyone other than Eric Bischoff? It ticks the fans off, doesn’t make the villain look right, and makes Flair look stupid. That’s fine once in awhile, but it’s the problem for WCW: the hero almost never got his day. It was always a screwjob of some form and the hero was supposed to fight another day. Eventually the fans got tired of waiting though and these moments stopped meaning anything.

As for the match itself, there’s really no logic to it either. Bischoff had WAY too much offense here as a single kick was enough to knock Flair all the way out to the floor. Last year Larry Zbyszko was staggered by some of his kicks but didn’t go out to the floor as a result. The heart attack angle was mentioned in passing by Tony and nothing more, making that almost entirely pointless. But hey, people think Eric Bischoff is a tough guy so everybody is happy right?

And from the next night on Nitro.

Ric Flair vs. Eric Bischoff

Flair being in power for 90 days vs. all of Flair’s possessions. There’s no Bischoff though as we see him in the back saying no way. Eric comes into the arena to get to an exit but the Horsemen are waiting in his limo to carry him to the arena. Nice move. The bell rings and Flair hits Bischoff low before chopping away in the corner. There’s another low blow and some choking as the referee counts especially slow. Not that it matters as Flair throws Charles Robinson down anyway.

The NWO tries to run in but the Horsemen are waiting for them in the aisle. Flair drops some elbows as the Horsemen cut off another group of NWO guys. The Giant finally comes out as the Horsemen are busy fighting and a big headbutt drops Flair. Anderson, Booker T., Konnan and Page come out as a JACKED Randy Savage and a good looking blonde come out in Black and White gear. It’s a swerve of course as Savage hits Giant low and clotheslines him to the floor. Flair suplexes Bischoff down and slaps on the Figure Four to become the boss for three months.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t a match but the angle worked very well. This felt like a big moment and a game changer for WCW. That being said, the question should be obvious: why in the world did Bischoff need to get the win at Starrcade? Either have this match last night or have it be a no contest of some sort. This moment taking place is fine, but how many people remember this compared to Bischoff getting the win at Starrcade? This felt like running back to fix an error and it worked to a degree. However, a lot of the damage was already done due to the fans feeling like they had been punched in the stomach the night before.

We’ll jump ahead over a year for a story that was used to promote the movie Ready to Rumble. From Thunder on April 26, 2000 and the match that ended WCW for good.

WCW World Title: David Arquette/Diamond Dallas Page vs. Eric Bischoff/Jeff Jarrett

Page is champion coming in and the winner of the fall gets the title. Bischoff brings out his wife Kimberly as the referee, even though she hates Page at the moment. The brawl is on with the expected pairings and Bischoff beats up Arquette. Back in the ring and Page puts Jarrett down with something off camera but Kimberly breaks a nail instead of counting.

A sitout powerbomb gets the same result, but Kimberly counts very fast on a Jarrett rollup. Bischoff comes back with a smile on his face and the heels take over. Arquette comes back as everything breaks down. Page kisses Kimberly in the corner to freak her out as David spears Bischoff down for the pin and the title via a second referee. I’m getting out of this one as fast as I can.

Rating: F. Nothing more to say.

Since WCW was dying, why not give Bischoff a Hardcore Title shot? From June 5, 2000.

Hardcore Title: Terry Funk vs. Eric Bischoff

Ernest Miller comes out to kick a chair into Funk’s face for two. Bischoff plays with knunchucks but Funk comes back with a trashcan to the wrestler. He uses it as a shield from the knunchucks before blasting Bischoff in the head. Miller and Eric try to leave but Funk chases after them.

At this point a five minute segment between Kimberly and Miss Hancock took place so we’ll skip over that until the match continues.

Funk wheels Bischoff out in a wheelbarrow as Russo and the Mamalukes are watching in the back. Russo sends them to the ring as Funk is threatening to take his tights down. Thankfully the Mamalukes hit the ring to destroy Terry and put Bischoff on top for the pin and the title. No rating of course but Hancock looked good in between at least.

Then WCW died because of stuff like Arquette as champion so Bischoff went to the WWE. His first match there was on Raw, February 17, 2003 against an old rival.

Eric Bischoff vs. Jim Ross

Bischoff breaks some boards and a watermelon before the match to show how awesome he is. JR comes to the ring in his announcing clothes and Eric makes it no holds barred because he can. He looks at Morely as he says this to really hammer in the idea. Lawler is really worried but of course he stays seated.

Bischoff does some karate poses but gets punched in the face. Morely comes in to beat JR down and puts a cinder block against Ross’ head so Bischoff can kick it in half. This finally brings Lawler down to take Morely down, but a Bischoff distraction lets Morely take the King down. JR is busted open. More kicks put Ross down and Bischoff covers him with a half nelson for the pin.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling. I’m not sure what it was, but it wasn’t wrestling. I’d like to point out that we’re spending the last segment of a show showing how Eric Bischoff could be a threat to STEVE AUSTIN. At least with Vince he would have some major backup, but Eric is going to have who? Morely? That’s supposed to be intriguing?

And now, the match that was setting up, from No Way Out 2003.

Steve Austin vs. Eric Bischoff

Ross comes out for this and is WAY too happy about this match. Eric tries to say that we don’t need to have this match but gets drowned out by glass shattering. The pop isn’t the same but it’s still there. This is his first appearance in like 8 months or so, meaning this is indeed a big deal.

Eric is on his own here. He tries to talk more but Austin beats the tar out of him. We hit on the Austin couldn’t draw argument that Bischoff made in 94. What a shock that young and talented guys like him and Foley were run off and replaced by Beefcake and Duggan when Hogan showed up. The Raw roster is enjoying this it seems.

Austin is borderline ripped here. Mudhole is stomped and it’s of course all Rattlesnake. Eric goes to the eyes and gets his kick to the chest no sold. To the floor for some more pounding as this is exactly what you would expect it to be. Stunner for Bischoff but Austin pulls him up twice. Another Stunner and again Austin pulls him up. The third Stunner does it. Austin does his usual schtick afterwards.

Rating: N/A. Not really a match but short enough to not really be that bad. The idea was to have Austin look like he’s awesome again which is fine but considering his last match would be at the next PPV it’s not like it meant much.

In August 2003, Bischoff got on Vince’s nerves and earned this punishment on August 11, 2003’s Raw.

Eric Bischoff vs. Kane

Eric lays down, gets lifted up for a chokeslam, dropped down with ease, and Kane walks out for the countout at about 30 seconds.

Here’s a slightly better match from Summerslam 2003.

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Before the match, Eric implies that he screwed Linda several times over that night. This brings out Shane to send Eric into the corner for a beating. Crossface punches send Bischoff to the floor but Shane clotheslines him in the back of the head. Back to ringside and Shane breaks the referee’s count (sidebar: why doesn’t that happen when both guys are on the floor and one guy slides back in at the last second?) before kicking away at Shane even more.

Bischoff is sent into the announce table and stomped down, only to have Coach come in with a chair and turning heel by helping Bischoff. The referee says ring the bell but Bischoff makes it No DQ and falls count anywhere. Shane is sent into the steps for two as Coach is playing the enforcer here. He holds Shane as Bischoff tells the production truck to turn off JR and King’s microphones so Coach can do commentary.

Bischoff starts firing off kicks as Coach does the eternally annoying JR impersonation. This keeps going for awhile until Shane gets in a right hand, only to be dropped by a low blow from Coach. Cue Steve Austin who can’t fight unless physically provoked. Shane shoves Coach into Austin which is enough for the beating to begin. Austin and Shane stomp Coach down in the corner and clear the ring. Austin has the mics turned back on as Shane grabs Eric’s hand and uses it to slap Austin’s face, meaning Austin can Stun Bischoff. That’s not good enough or Shane so he puts Eric on the table for the big elbow for the pin.

Rating: N/A. This was a long segment instead of a match. Also to recap how stupid things were at this point, we’re supposed to be interested in Austin/Shane vs. Coach/Bischoff when Austin has equal power to Eric. We also have Stephanie vs. Sable, because EVERYONE wants to see the McMahons dominating the show. This is in addition to Evolution dragging Raw down the drain with the Kevin Nash and Goldberg feuds. See why 2003 is considered so bad?

Here’s a match that would have made a million dollars in 1998 but we got it on Raw, February 24, 2004.

Vince McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Austin is guest referee just to make it more awesome. Bischoff is in his karate gear and offers a handshake. Vince shakes his hand and proceeds to beat the tar out of him with knees to the ribs. Eric fires off some kicks to little avail but Austin breaks up a Vince choke in the corner. The boss slaps Austin and earns a right hand, allowing Bischoff to tee off with kicks. The fight heads to the floor and we get the real point of the match: Brock Lesnar sneaks in and F5’s Austin for the no contest.

It turned out Bischoff had a nephew that was, shall we say, special. Eric verbally abused him for a long time and a match was made at Taboo Tuesday 2004.

Eric Bischoff vs. Eugene

The stipulation will be announced after the match. Bischoff is Eugene’s uncle for your explanation. Eric uses the power of martial arts to start which makes sense to anyone who follows tournament karate, according to Tony Schiavone. He feigns injury and kicks Eugene in the head. It’s Hulk Up time and there’s an airplane spin. The big boot and legdrop ends this.

Rating: N/A. Dang Eugene was over at this point. Even I loved him.

Loser Wears a Dress 21%
Loser is the Winner’s Servant 20%
Loser is Shaved Bald 59%

Oh dear. This would be the end of Bischoff’s black hair. Coach tries to talk Eugene into accepting the servant thing for five minutes. And here’s Vince, apparently interested about something. Dang Nick Dinsmore played that character to perfection. Vince says that the crowd has spoken so the shaving is happening.

Eugene does the cutting and Bischoff’s face is great. Coach gets put in the dress for no apparent reason. Vince tells him to take his shirt and pants off. I honestly wonder how many other men he’s said that too over the years. The mannequin the dress was on has balls. Vince: “Button that dress up! Don’t be a sl**!” Vince sees the gray roots of the hair and has a field day with it. He totally steals the show here and it’s great.

Bischoff would be Raw GM for the better part of ever. John Cena came to Raw in 2005 and since it’s WWE, they tried to make it Vince vs. Austin. Here’s Bischoff’s required title shot on Raw, October 3, 2005.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Eric Bischoff

Angle is here with Bischoff. This was at a period where Batista was the biggest star in the company but Cena was on the rise. At this point, Cena was still pretty much a guy just barely not in over his head. He would grow up a lot over the next six to eight months and become the John Cena that we all know today.

Eric’s kick is countered and remember that it’s No DQ. Cena never takes his eyes off Angle. Angle tries to interfere and Eric gets in some kicks. There’s the Shuffle but Kurt comes in. The Slam is countered but the FU is broken up by a low blow. Angle misses a chair shot and hits himself by mistake. FU ends this clean. This was like two minutes long.

What Bischoff collection is complete without this disaster from Survivor Series 2005?

Eric Bischoff vs. Teddy Long

Yes this is real, yes it’s happening on PPV, yes we’re supposed to ignore Bischoff being a martial arts expert from WCW and thing Teddy might have a chance in a straight fight, and yes this is going to SUCK. Teddy has some network consultant with him named Palmer Cannon who never lasted long. They’re both GM’s if that wasn’t clear. Teddy poses a lot on the corner and we haven’t had any contact after a minute. Teddy dances a bit and Eric misses a kick. There’s more dancing and no contact still.

We do the exact same thing AGAIN before Eric chokes Teddy with his sash. There are two referees in there for no apparent reason. Eric chokes away but Teddy takes off his shoe and whacks Eric in the head. Bischoff goes to the throat to stop Teddy again…..and here’s the Boogeyman. If you’ve never seen him, picture Darth Maul from the first Star Wars prequel if he ate worms. He sneaks up on Eric and lays him out with a pumphandle slam, giving Teddy the pin.

Rating: S. Six minutes. This match took SIX MINUTES. The WWE owes me six minutes of my life back. John Cena vs. Kurt Angle for the WWE Championship can only get thirteen minutes but this gets SIX? Who in the world thought this was a good idea? At least it went by….no actually it didn’t go by fast. This won worst match of the year and I can’t argue at all.

We jump WAY ahead to TNA now for a pair of matches from the Immortal days, which really need no introductions. We’ll start with Impact on May 19, 2011.

Generation Me vs. Matt Hardy/Eric Bischoff

No entrance for Gen Me.  Matt vs. Jeremy to start us off and Matt uses his size advantage to take over.  Gen Me speeds things up as is their custom and work on Matt’s arm.  Matt takes over for a bit but since it’s more or less a handicap match, Gen Me takes over again with double teaming.  Poetry in Motion to Matt and Jeremy takes him down with a spear.

Matt fights back but both guys do down.  Matt wants a tag and Bischoff freaks, allowing Jeremy to hit a frog splash to Matt’s back for two.  450 attempt eats knees as we’re told that Foley and Hogan will be here next week.  Ice Pick, that double underhook chokeout by Matt has Max out cold so Bischoff comes in for a kick and the academic pin at 6:07.

Rating: D. The match sucked and the burial/elimination of the X Division continues.  I’m not complaining, but at the same time is there a reason that on a show about the rebirth of wrestling to have Eric Bischoff get a pin?  The match itself was bad on top of that but I’ve seen worse.  The Bucks using high spots is always a plus.

From Lockdown 2012.

Lethal Lockdown

Team Eric: Eric Bischoff, Gunner, Bully Ray, Kazarian, Christopher Daniels
Team Garrett: Garrett Bischoff, AJ Styles, Mr. Anderson, Rob Van Dam, Austin Aries

I was worried this would close the show so this is a nice surprise. This is TNA’s WarGames match and if Garrett’s team loses, he’s out of TNA. If Eric’s team loses, he’s out and can’t use his name in wrestling again. Three minute opening period then two minutes for each one after that and Team Eric has the advantage. Gunner and Garrett start of course and it’s power vs. speed.

Garrett tries to avoid the power but after a missile dropkick, Gunner takes over by running him down. Into the corner and Gunner hits a running knee to the head. No pins or submissions until all ten are in remember. He rams Garrett into the steel and Bully Ray is out next for a two minute advantage. Gunner holds him for a running boot to the chest. This is pure dominance for about 90 seconds until Austin Aries is in fourth. The fans were cheering his name so they’re giving the people what they want.

Aries EXPLODES on Ray in the corner and gets in some shots on Gunner as well. At about a minute in he runs into a boot and Ray takes over. Garrett stays in the corner where he belongs as Aries, the actually good wrestler, does the work. A missile dropkick puts Ray down and Kazarian, with a nearly shaved head, is in next. The fans chant that he looks stupid and it’s a three on one beatdown of Garrett. Gunner chokes Aries as Kaz fires off kicks to the ribs of Garrett.

AJ evens things up as this is in classic WarGames formula already. Kaz tries to meet him coming in but AJ slams the door on his head. Pele takes Gunner down but Ray runs him over. Sweet dropkick takes Ray down and everyone pairs off. Here’s Daniels for another advantage. It’s 4-3 at the moment and Daniels gives Team Eric the big advantage. Ray pulls off his belt and Garrett takes a whipping.

Anderson is the fourth guy for his team so there’s just Eric and RVD to go. It’s the heel beatdown again but AJ manages a nice suplex on Ray. Now back to your regularly scheduled beatdown with thirty seconds to go before Eric comes in. Here’s Eric in business casual attire. He holds Garrett for a big chop from Ray and Gunner gets in one as well. Eric and Daniels talk trash as the clock counts down.

Here’s Van Dam and he cleans house. There hasn’t been a lot of that in this match so far. There hasn’t been much to commentate on because it’s been 17 minutes of punching and kicking so far. That’s what these matches usually are so it’s not a shock, but it’s still not that interesting. Eric hides in the corner and here come the weapons. The match basically resets here as everyone gets a weapon and Team Garrett takes over.

Daniels takes a bunch of weapon shots and Aries stomps away on Ray. Eric gets dragged in by AJ and Austin and the beating commences. Van Dam loads up the Five Star but Gunner crotches him. Ray lawn darts Aries into the cage but Anderson comes back with a swinging neckbreaker to Daniels. Kaz gets the spotlight now as he beats up everyone before focusing on AJ.

Kaz monkey bars across the top of the cage but AJ follows him and kicks him down. He drops an elbow down on Kazarian and RVD hits the Five Star. Ray takes Van Dam down but picks up a chair. YOU DON’T PICK UP A CHAIR IN A ROB VAN DAM MATCH! Van Daminator puts him down but Daniels pops up to take Van Dam out. Daniels goes after Garrett but Garrett hits his falling Diamond Cutter.

He covers Daniels but Eric grabs a kendo stick to pound away on him. Eric insults his own wife by calling Garrett an SOB and beats Garrett half to death. The fans want blood. Eric is the only one up at the moment. Garrett pops up and guitars Eric for the pin at 26:04 to get rid of Eric for I’d say three months or so. That was completely out of nowhere.

Rating: C-. This was probably the worst Lethal Lockdown I can ever remember. There was A LOT of punching and kicking and no big spot at all. Also the whole thing here was supposed to be about Garrett’s big comeback but really all he did was pop up after a bunch of kendo stick shots, hit Eric once and pin him. Naturally that probably means more TV time for Garrett because that’s what the fans are screaming for in Eric’s ears, but that’s life in TNA. Getting this out of the way first was a good idea though.

It was this or Barry O. What do you expect me to do? Bischoff isn’t a wrestler, but somehow he’s had multiple World Title shots, a title reign, and several wins over Hall of Fame caliber wrestlers. Funny how that works isn’t it?

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Impact Wrestling
Date: June 12, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Slammiversary and the big story is of course a war between Dixie Carter and MVP because where would we be without the focus being on Dixie? The problem with Impact’s taping schedule rears its head again tonight and this weekend though as MVP is injured and may not be able to go on Sunday, so everything tonight may mean nothing at all. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video narrated by MVP, talking about how he’s risen to power.

Here’s Eric Young in gear to open the show. Young says this Sunday is the biggest match of his career but he wants to say something to the trio in person. MVP comes out and explains that he and Dixie don’t see things the same so Eric has MVP’s undivided attention. Eric is ready for Sunday but MVP says he’s still half man and half amazing, so after he takes the title on Sunday, Eric can go back to fishing.

After the plug for Young’s fishing show, Eric asks that Sunday be a fair fight. MVP likes the idea but he can’t guarantee that Lashley and King can control themselves. Young says he has no problem with losing a fair fight, but getting beaten down three on one isn’t wrestling. He’s willing to do anything to make sure it’s even on Sunday and MVP likes the sound of that.

Young can pick the stipulation on Sunday, if Eric can beat all three of them in one night. King says Eric couldn’t beat two of them but Eric is ready to try. MVP is willing to give Eric a break and says Eric can pick the stipulations if he wins 2/3. The deal is made and it’s Lashley up first.

Eric Young vs. Bobby Lashley

Eric hammers away to start but gets drilled with forearms in the corner. A backdrop puts Bobby down but Eric comes back with a running forearm that appeared to mostly miss. Young avoids a charge in the corner but does a Flair Flip into the sliding sunset flip. Lashley will have none of that though and launches Eric to the floor.

Eric is sent into the steps and comes up holding his back. Lashley is no idiot and puts on a torture rack followed by an over the shoulder backbreaker. Young punches his way out and nails a nice dropkick before stopping a charging Bobby with two boots in the corner. He jumps off the corner into the Dominator powerslam though and Lashley gets the pin at 5:11.

Rating: D+. Basic match here and I already don’t like the booking here. Young went from fresh to pinned clean in less than six minutes three days before a PPV title defense. You have Young beat King before this match and then have him lose to Lashley to protect him and get the same result. Why is that so hard?

Lashley goes after Young again but Samoa Joe makes the save.

Willow says he’s bruised but not broken. He’ll turn the tide tonight because patience is on vacation.

Eric Young can’t stand up but says he has to go back out there.

Samoa Joe says this is the latest sign of a problem with MVP.

Here are Bram and Magnus in street clothes with something to say. Bram talks about how Magnus was treated so badly and turned into someone Bram didn’t know. Magnus says he and Bram are unstoppable and they’ve made Jeff Hardy so scared that he’s gotten a new identity. Willow comes out and says he’s from Jeff Hardy’s Imagin-I-Nation and says he goes where Jeff can’t.

Willow vs. Magnus is set for Sunday and Willow says they’ll (as in himself and someone else) will celebrate. Bram: “You and Jeff Hardy? YOU’RE THE SAME BLOODY PERSON!” Willow admits that he’s Hardy and says someone will be in his corner on Sunday. Bram asks who and it’s Abyss, who comes out to clean house.

Ethan Carter III says his aunt isn’t here tonight but he’ll take care of the family business. They’re the Carters after all.

Robbie E. vs. Knux

The comedy story continues as Robbie is terrified of clowns, including Crazy Steve at ringside. Robbie hits on Rebel but The Freak easily chases him off. Robbie’s right hands are stopped by a Steve distraction, allowing Knux to hit a nice running cross body. E. comes back with a nice middle rope clothesline but DJZ and Steve get in a horn off. Knux splashes Robbie in the corner as the Freak takes care of the other Bro Mans. Back in and a nice Sky High pins Robbie at 3:09.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here but that Sky High was really nice, as was Rebel. At the end of the day, the division needs challengers for the Wolves but one of the few teams is being wasted in this comedy feud. To be fair though, the Bro Mans are comedy characters so what else do you expect?

Post match Steve attaches balloons to Robbie’s back to freak him out.

EC3 and Spud are talking in the back when Brooke returns. She doesn’t say anything but she returns.

Ethan and Spud are in the ring with three chairs set up. Ethan brings out Brooke as he plans on exposing the past sins of Bully Ray. He asks Brooke if she was in a relationship with Ray and asks why it’s over. Carter accuses Ray of being an alcoholic and trying to put Brooke through a table but Brooke denies it. Spud says he can’t deal with this anymore because he has the results. Apparently Ray IS the father, even though Brooke hasn’t had a baby. Spud produces pictures of Ray next to an angry looking kid but Ethan is annoyed. He threatens Brooke until Ray comes out and runs them off.

Before he deals with Carter and Spud, Ray wants to apologize to Brooke. He treated her horribly despite her being an amazing girlfriend. Now Ray is in a better place in his life and wants to wish Brooke the best. They hug and Ethan sounds like he’s gagging. Ethan and Ray argue for a bit until Ethan challenges Ray to a tables match on Sunday, because Ray is putting Dixie through a table over Ethan’s dead body. Ray loves the idea of a dead body and starts a chant about it, but he’ll decline the tables match. Instead, since we’ll be in Carter Country in Dallas, let’s make it a Texas death match. Ethan says it’s on.

MVP tells Kenny King to keep focused out there tonight.

Kenny King vs. Eric Young

Second match in Young’s 2/3 challenge tonight. Young gets armdragged down to start and his back is already bothering him. They head to the floor with the champion in even more trouble. Back in and Young shoves him off the top, only to get slammed down for his troubles. Young avoids a springboard Swanton Bomb and nails the piledriver out of nowhere for the pin at 5:12.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and the outcome was already completely clear. I still don’t get why this wasn’t in another order, but it’s TNA so this isn’t the biggest problem that they have to deal with. It also doesn’t help that the fans are already sick of seeing the same people over and over again and now they get to see the same guy three times in one night.

Eric says he’ll keep fighting.

Brittany vs. Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim

Winner gets Angelina on Sunday. Brittany and Madison double team Gail to start but Madison won’t high five her. Gail dropkicks both of them to the floor and does it again through the ropes. Cue the Beautiful People as we take a break. Back with the Beautiful People on commentary and Madison hitting a headsicssors on Gail, followed by a slow motion victory roll for two. Gail puts a leg choke on Brittany but gets caught in a cross armbreaker by Madison.

That makes Gail let go of her hold but she rolls Madison up for two. Kim goes up top but gets caught in a double superplex (with her thankfully kicking off the post to make it easier for them) to put all three down. Madison nails Brittany but gets sent to the floor as a result. Gail puts Brittany in the figure four around the post as the Beautiful People come out to ringside. Kim runs Brittany over as Angelina distracts the referee. Velvet sprays Brittany in the eyes by mistake, allowing Gail to hit Eat Defeat for the pin at 10:09.

Rating: D+. This gives us I believe the 284th title match between Angelina and Gail. That’s the problem with the entire Knockouts division as a whole: it’s the same core group of about five girls having the same feuds and the same matches over and over and over with only occasionally someone jumping into the division, getting a title run, then leaving it back to the core group. Just please find a new direction for the next 8 years so I don’t have to watch the Beautiful People vs. Gail/Madison again.

MVP is talking to Brian Hebner and says it’s going to be a fair main event.

We run down the PPV card. The only added match is King vs. Aries.

MVP vs. Eric Young

If Young wins he gets to pick the stipulation. Lashley and King jump Young in the aisle before the bell and we take a break about five seconds after the match starts. Back with MVP staying on Young’ sback and putting him in a camel clutch before just letting it go so he can get two off an uppercut. A wicked powerbomb gets two and a buckle bomb sets up the running boot to the face in the corner for a close two on the champion. MVP grabs a chair to sit in and talk some trash but Young is starting to get up. Instead MVP picks up the chair to blast Eric in the back for the DQ at 10:14.

Rating: C. The match made sense and at least they didn’t give it a clean finish. MVP being the cocky heel makes sense and going after the back as much as he did makes even more sense, but I’ve over this feud already. MVP almost has to win the title on Sunday, if nothing else to end this over done Eric Young title reign.

MVP says pick whatever stipulation you want and poses with the belt. The trio leaves and Young makes it a cage match to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was significantly better than most of their previous shows but it still had its issues. First and foremost, WAY too much Eric Young, which is another incarnation of the same issue they’ve been having time after time now: too much of the same idea, meaning that if you don’t like that one idea, there’s no need for you to watch the show. The stuff they had wasn’t terible and it set up the payoff at the end well enough, but I don’t really want to see Young for a fourth time in three days.

Other than that, the show wasn’t that bad and they did a good job of setting up the show on Sunday. That’s TNA in a nutshell: the payoff is usually decent, but man alive is it hard to get through the buildup. The wrestling was pretty standard tonight, but a lot of angles were advanced and you can see the logical matches coming on Sunday.

However, a five match card with a comedy match, a Knockouts three way and then three Eric Young matches (including the World Title match three days before the pay per view) doesn’t do it for me, especially when there were so many people (Aries, Anderson and Storm to be exact) that didn’t get any time tonight. Also the X-Division is having a multi man ladder match on Sunday and wasn’t mentioned at all here. That’s TNA for you: they do some ok stuff, but it’s at a bad expense of other stuff.

Results
Bobby Lashley b. Eric Young – Dominator
Knux b. Robbie E. – Sky High
Eric Young b. Kenny King – Piledriver
Gail Kim b. Brittany and Madison Rayne – Eat Defeat to Brittany
Eric Young b. MVP via DQ when MVP used a chair

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NXT
Date: June 12, 2014
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Alex Riley, Renee Young

The main story coming out of last week is we’re going to get Kidd vs. Neville II after Adrian successfully defended the title at Takeover. Other than that last week was pretty much just a placeholder show until we get to the next big show around here. Even last week’s relatively meaningless show was fine though and that’s a nice thing to say about a promotion. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of Tyson Kidd failing to win the NXT Title and thinking of himself as Natalya’s husband rather than a superstar. Then he lost and wouldn’t shake Adrian’s hand, only to request and receive a rematch last week.

Opening sequence.

Bayley/Paige/Emma vs. BFF’s

Charlotte takes Emma into the corner to start but gets shouldered in the ribs and caught in a sunset flip for two. Back up and Emma slaps the champion in the face so Charlotte drags her back into the corner for a tag off to Banks. Summer looks annoyed at not getting the tag. Charlotte is back in less than fifteen seconds later but Sasha trips up Emma to slam her face first into the apron. Emma is in trouble and we take an early break.

Back with Summer holding Emma in a chinlock before mocking the Emma Dance. Charlotte comes in again with a figure four neck lock to keep Emma in trouble. Another tag brings in Sasha who gets rolled up for two but Emma still can’t make the tag. The BFF’s make some switches in the corner sans tags as Renee seems to like Summer’s legs. All three keep taking their shots on Emma as this has been totally one sided so far.

Sasha hooks a chinlock but Emma is quickly up and avoiding a charge into the corner. The hot tag finally brings in Bayley to clean house, including a belly to belly for two on Charlotte. Everything breaks down and Charlotte gets two off a bridging rollup on Bayley. Summer accidentally distracts Charlotte though, allowing Bayley to grab a rollup for the pin at 8:50.

Rating: C. This was fine but I’m surprised Paige didn’t get in there to clean house a bit. Bayley getting the pin sets her up as the next challenger while also advancing the feud between the BFF’s. I love it when booking is able to cover that many things at the same time and it’s hard to do for some reason anymore.

A masked man was signed to a contract earlier in the week. He Bolieves he’ll make a great impression. JBL seems to know something is up.

The BFF’s are freaking out in the back when Alexa Bliss comes up and asks for a match with Charlotte. The champ tells her to go away which Bliss interprets as a yes.

Colin Cassady vs. Sylvester LeFort

Cassady throws him around to start but LeFort goes after the knee to take over. The fans chant USA and Colin comes back with some loud shots to the ribs. Cassady nails Sylvester again and hits the S-A-W-F-T boot and the East River Crossing gets the pin at 2:26.

Natalya says she can be out there with Tyson tonight but Kidd thinks it’s about him instead of her. The wife isn’t pleased.

Aiden English is singing about how no one knows the trouble he’s seen when a guy with a mustache comes up and offers to shake his hand. The guy won’t talk, walks off screen, does something that amazes Aiden, and comes back with a piece of the set over his shoulder. Ok then.

Sami Zayn vs. Mr. NXT

He’s the masked man from earlier and it’s clearly Bo Dallas, down to the entrance and running around the ring. Apparently he’s a Mexican gold medalist in wrestling. Sami rolls his eyes at this but gets caught in a headlock. Mr. NXT celebrates and draws a dueling YOU CAN’T FOOL US/YES HE CAN chant. Some armdrags drop the masked man and now Sami celebrates a bit. Mr. NXT comes back with elbows and says he is NOT Bo Dallas. The Bodog is countered and Sami rips the mask off to reveal Bo. Fans: BO LEAVE! The Helluva Kick gets the pin for Sami at 4:06.

Rating: C. Comedy match and there’s nothing wrong with that. Bo is great at wanting back in NXT because it’s his life and it’s totally different from his run on Raw and Smackdown. It’s also nice to see Sami get a win over a big name instead of coming so close and then losing at the last minute.

Sami brings out security to eject Dallas but he tries to run away, only to finally get caught. Bo grabs a mic and says he’s being kidnapped. They get outside and Bo runs away again, threatening to call the real police. Bo is finally taken out after a break.

NXT Title: Tyson Kidd vs. Adrian Neville

Tyson is challenging and we get big match intros. Feeling out process to start with both guys gaining and losing quick control. Tyson grabs a top wristlock before taking him down to the mat for a hammerlock. Neville speeds things up and backdrops Tyson to the floor for a big crash. There’s the flip dive from the champion for two back inside and now it’s Neville cranking on an armbar.

We take a break and come back with Tyson holding a chinlock and drawing a NATTIE’S HUSBAND chant. Neville fights up but is quickly backdropped for two and it’s back to the chinlock. Back up again with Neville getting kicked in the ribs, only to come back with an enziguri. Adrian goes to the apron but gets kicked in the head as well, allowing Tyson to hit a top rope flip legdrop with Adrian in the ropes for three, but Adrian’s foot is in the ropes, as pointed out by Natalya (looking stunning all dolled up here).

Kidd ties him up in the Tree of Woe for some knees to the ribs and a running dropkick to the face. The Sharpshooter goes on but Neville crawls to the ropes. Kidd gets kicked in the head but still manages to break up the Red Arrow. The Blockbuster gets two so Kidd drops a top rope elbow for another near fall. Kidd is very frustrated so he goes outside and gets a chair. Natalya takes it away, allowing Neville to kick his head off and hit the Red Arrow to retain at 14:35.

Rating: B. This was a totally different kind of match than they had at Takeover and it still worked very well. This was much more about Kidd going to further and further extremes to win the title and getting caught when he went too far. Very good match here and it told a totally different story.

Natalya consoles her husband to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Set up stories one week, pay them off the next week. That’s wrestling storytelling at its finest and that’s all you need to do a lot of the time. The fact that the wrestling was good on top of all that makes things even better. The Bo Dallas stuff was funny as usual and the whole show just worked. Totally fun hour of wrestling TV.

Results
Bayley/Paige/Emma b. BFF’s – Rollup to Charlotte
Colin Cassady b. Sylvester LeFort – East River Crossing
Sami Zayn b. Mr. NXT – Helluva Kick
Adrian Neville b. Tyson Kidd – Red Arrow

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