Monday Night Raw
Date: October 21, 2013
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before the Cell pay per view this Sunday and almost everything is set. Actually everything has pretty much been set since Battlefield, hence why this show isn’t likely to be very interesting. Tonight we have Big Show losing his name to HHH (whatever that might mean) and the contract signing for Orton vs. Bryan. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the tag titles changing hands last week.

Here are HHH and Stephanie to get us going. Stephanie runs down the card for Sunday’s show and HHH talks about Shawn guaranteeing a new champion. HHH mentions the word respect and Big Show hacks into the satellite feed and rants about respect. For some reason his eyes are looking just to the left of the camera. Stephanie isn’t sure how he’s on the screen but HHH and Big Show yell at each other about money and lawsuits. Big Show says HHH must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed, but any side of Stephanie is a bad side to wake up on. Stephanie cuts the feed and HHH says on with the show.

Daniel Bryan vs. Shield

Dean cranks on the arm to start but Daniel armdrags out of it and puts on an armbar of his own. A running clothesline gets two for Bryan and it’s back to the arm again for some psychology. Bryan fires off a kick to the arm and cranks on it even more. Dean blocks the running dropkick in the corner and drops an elbow to take over. A suplex gets two for Dean but Bryan comes right back with a knee to the chest and a suplex of his own. Ambrose rolls to the floor to avoid the headbutt and we take a break.

Back with Bryan fighting out of an Ambrose chinlock, only to be caught by a knee to the ribs to put him down. A running dropkick against the ropes drops Bryan again and it’s off to a quick armbar. Dean drops him with a back elbow and it’s off to a triangle choke. Bryan rolls out and counters into the full surfboard hold before pulling Dean’s neck back for an added choke. Dean goes to the eyes to send Bryan to the apron, only to have Daniel pound away with right hands.

Bryan goes up top but gets pulled down with a superplex for two. We hit the chinlock again but Bryan counters into a backslide for two of his own. A double cross body puts both guys down but it’s Bryan up first with right hands. He backflips over Dean in the corner and takes him down with the running clothesline. The running dropkick in the corner connects and Bryan snaps off a top rope hurricanrana for two. A tornado DDT of all things is countered by Dean into a spinebuster for two.

Daniel backdrops him to the floor and there’s the FLYING GOAT for good measure. Back in and a missile dropkick takes Dean down yet again. Bryan nips up and fires off the YES kicks to the vested chest. The big kick to the head is countered into a rollup but Bryan counters into the YES Lock for the submission at 16:20.

Rating: B. Good match here and a good way to put Bryan over before he goes into the title match on Sunday. However, the usual complaint about a single champion losing holds true here. Rollins or Reigns could have done the job here and the result would have been exactly the same. Really good stuff though and a good way to start Raw.

Here’s Punk for the hard sell for the match on Sunday. He talks about the Cell defining legacies and how his legacy will be defined by what he does to Heyman inside the Cell. Heyman thinks Ryback can help him, but there is nothing Punk won’t do to win. The point isn’t to make Paul submit or pin him, but rather to put Ryback to sleep and then torture Heyman with every single inch of the Cell that he can. The winner of the match will be the best in the world.

HHH and Stephanie give Vickie some directions before going into their office to find Shawn Michaeles. Shawn and HHH hug like old friends and Shawn cracks some jokes about HHH being a powerful businessman. HHH says Bryan can be the champion but not the face of the company. Shawn says people said that about both he and HHH back in the day but Stephanie cuts them off and rants about Big Show. Shawn points out that Stephanie used to think it was funny when DX hacked the feed but Stephanie doesn’t think it’s funny now. Luckily Shawn didn’t have to grow up so he’s going to go have some fun.

Santino Marella vs. Heath Slater

Santino, Khali and Horny are all dressed as Elvis. We start off with some Marella Martial Arts as the announcers make music jokes, including a Gentrys reference by JBL (Jimmy Hart’s band). Slater takes him down and puts on a quick body vice before sending Santino into the corner for some shoulders. Heath misses a charge into the post and Santino comes back with the usual. The Cobra has an Elvis wig on too but Slater kicks him in the ribs. Slater goes to the middle rope but Santino nips up and Slater jumps into the Cobra for the pin at 3:27.

Rating: D+. Do I really need to explain this one?

Post match Santino says there’s just one King in Memphis and has Jerry get up on the announce table for some Elvis dancing.

The fans want to see Punk vs. Undertaker from Wrestlemania simulated in WWE 14 instead of Shawn vs. Razor, Rock vs. Austin (WM 15) or Savage vs. DiBiase.

We recap the opening segment.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler throws Orton to the floor to start but Dolph makes the mistake of following, allowing Orton to send him into the barricade and clothesline him down. Back inside we go but Orton takes it right back to the floor. Ziggler escapes the Elevated DDT and drives Orton into the barricade to stomp him down. Orton kicks Dolph away and heads back inside to keep up the fast opening pace.

Ziggler pounds on Orton in the corner and a clothesline is good for two. Orton takes Ziggler down again and grabs an armbar which transitions into a chinlock to give us a breather. Back up and Ziggler scores with a neckbreaker and the Fameasser gets two. Ziggler’s Stinger Splash is caught in a t-bone suplex and the Elevated DDT lays him out again. Orton takes forever to load up the RKO and Ziggler comes back with a dropkick for two, only to charge into the RKO for the pin at 7:48.

Rating: C+. I was liking this match for the most part with the pace being very fast throughout the match. Ziggler didn’t have much of a chance but at least he was showing some fire out there instead of just going through the motions. The false ending with the dropkick before the RKO was a nice touch as well.

Video on Cena’s rehab.

Bella Twins vs. Tamina Snuka/AJ Lee

Brie takes Tamina down to start but the Twin is knocked to the floor with ease. Back in and a snap suplex gets two on Brie before we hit the cravate. Off to Nikki who is easily slammed down before it’s off to AJ, who gets the biggest reaction of the match. Nikki fights out of a chinlock and makes the hot tag off to Brie, sending the fans back into their coma. Brie speeds things up and dropkicks Brie down, only to get caught in a half crab. Brie hits a bad looking knee to the ribs before accidentally kneeing Tamina in the head. Not that it matters though as the Bella Buster pins AJ at 5:27.

Rating: D. The Bellas look good in their outfits but man alive this face turn isn’t working. The problem is the double turn by the Bellas and AJ depends on if you like Total Divas. If you like the show, you buy the double turn. If you don’t like Total Divas, you side with AJ, even though there aren’t any shades of gray in the story. AJ is meant to be the heel and Brie as the girl who is fighting for what she wants, even though no one seems to care.

We look at Big E. Langston’s face turn on Sunday before Paul Heyman and Guys run into Renee Young in the back. Heyman goes into a full blown over the top sales pitch about why you would want to see an execution live on Sunday. He doesn’t stop for air for about 45 seconds, ranting and raving about Punk fantasizing about killing him and then going into a story about being a volcano erupting and villagers running while worshipping CM Punk.

Heyman then stops and says he’s totally in control of his monster Ryback, meaning Punk can’t get his hands on Heyman. He won’t be locked in a Cell with Punk, but rather Punk is locked in a Cell with him. Langston comes up and asks who is a marginal talent now. The Heyman guys step up to him and Langston vs. Axel is made for later tonight. Find this Heyman promo if you can as it’s very entertaining stuff.

We get a video from 2007/2011 of Shawn talking about training Daniel Bryan. We even get really rare clips of Daniel Bryan in the Texas Wrestling Alliance, which was Shawn’s indy company.

Wyatt Family vs. The Miz/Kofi Kingston

Rowan runs over Miz to start and takes him down with a quick backbreaker. Harper comes in and puts on a front facelock while rolling around on the mat. Off to a traditional headlock for a bit before Miz pops up, only to charge into a Michinoku Driver for two. Harper is kicked away and it’s finally off to Kofi to speed things up. Kofi jumps up into the corner for a nice hurricanrana followed by jumping back to the top for a cross body for two. Rowan misses a big boot and is knocked to the floor before Trouble in Paradise takes him out again. Not that it matters as Harper takes Kofi’s head off with the clothesline for the pin at 4:48.

Rating: C. This was another fast paced match and that’s what Raw needs to do this week. They had a very dull offering last week so fast paced stuff with characters like the Wyatts is a good idea. Miz vs. Bray will be a good squash for Wyatt and it’s kind of nice to see a build like this for a change.

Post match the Wyatts take out Miz and tie him in the ropes so Bray can talk about the afterlife being real.

Big E. Langston vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel

The Heyman Guys jump Langston before the bell and they fight out to the floor with Langston being caught in the numbers game. Langston manages to fight back and clothesline Axel down, only to have Heyman blast him with a kendo stick as a distraction. Ryback runs Langston over with a shot to the back but here’s Punk with the stick for the save. Vickie pops up to make it a tag match.

Big E. Langston/CM Punk vs. Curtis Axel/Ryback

Joined in progress with Punk in control of Axel before bringing in Langston for a double hiptoss. Quickly back to Punk who is taken down by Ryback as JBL talks about what a great agent Heyman is. Off to Axel for a chinlock but Punk fights up and hits a spinning cross body for two. Ryback comes in again and powers Punk down, only to be caught by the high kick to the head. The hot tag brings in Langston to clean house and hit the Warrior Splash. There goes the strap and Punk hits the springboard clothesline to Ryback. The Big Ending finishes Axel at 6:35 shown.

Rating: D+. The expiration date on this feud was a few weeks ago, but it looks like it’s finally done this Sunday. There was just nothing to see here from Punk vs. the Heyman Guys, but Langston gave things a breath of fresh air. He’s SO much better as a face and giving him a feud with Axel at least gives him something to do. Match was there at best.

Punk chases Heyman into the crowd post match.

R-Truth shills WWE merchandise. He’s energetic if nothing else. You can get 20% off tonight only if you use the promo code “Truth”.

Tons of Funk vs. Real Americans

The Real Americans charge the ring and throw in black flags before posing with them up on the ropes. Colter is on commentary again here. Tensai chops Swagger into the corner but Cesaro comes in off a blind tag to take over. A jumping seated senton gets two and it’s back to Swagger as Colter rants about Los Matadores. The Vader Bomb/double stomp combo gets two on Tensai and it’s off to a Cesaro chinlock. Tensai fights up and tags in to Brodus, only to have him get caught by an uppercut, setting up the Cesaro Swing to Clay. Swagger comes in for the Patriot Lock and the submission on Brodus at 3:34.

Rating: D. The match was nothing of note and was just there for a way to do post match stuff with Colter. The shine that the Swing had given Cesaro is already gone and WWE has no problem with just letting it go by because we need to use the Americans to put over Los Matadores. Nothing match.

Post match Colter pulls out a bull whip to use on Torito. When he wrestled as Dutch Mantell, Colter’s trademark was a bull whip.

We get a retrospective on Cena’s career. Think they’re pushing his return hard enough?

Here are Cody and Goldust for commentary, complete with a remixed version of their combined themes.

Usos vs. Shield

Despite the Usos winning the #1 contendership fairly, this is for the title shot on Sunday. Jey starts with Rollins and gets a quick pair of near falls off some rollups. They slug it out with Jey sending Rollins to the floor and nailing a great looking dive. Back in and it’s off to Reigns vs. Jimmy with the twin cranking on Roman’s arm. The announcers talk about JBL being the new GM of NXT as Jimmy has to fight out of the Shield corner. Rollins speeds things up and drops Jimmy throat first on the top rope for two before dropkicking him out to the floor.

Cody: “If you built a liar from the ground up he would loo just like John Bradshaw Layfield.” Goldust: “OH SNAP!” Back in and Reigns puts on a front facelock but Jimmy fights out and gets to the apron. Roman can’t suplex him into the ring but some Ambrose interference brings Jimmy to the floor as we take a break. Back with Reigns getting two off a suplex and getting frustrated at Jimmy kicking out again. We hit another chinlock before Jimmy fights up and DDTs Roman down. Rollins comes in but gets backdropped to the floor, only to have Roman make a blind tag as Seth goes over.

Jimmy catches Reigns with an enziguri and there’s the hot tag. Things speed up with Jey cleaning house but Reigns takes his head off with a clothesline out of the corner for two. Reigns breaks up a pin off the toss in the air Samoan Drop and a powerslam puts Jimmy down. Jey comes back with the superkick to Reigns but the Superfly Splash hits knees. Ambrose gets in a fight with the tag champions, drawing in Rollins and the Usos for the no contest at 14:15.

Rating: C+. Match was your usual good stuff with Shield but the ending was pretty clearly going to a three way at the PPV. Shield winning unfairly screws over the Usos and there’s no way they were doing face vs. face for the titles. Hopefully the Usos FINALLY get their title reign out of this though.

Post match the four good guys clear the ring of the Shield.

HHH and Stephanie are in the ring for the contract signing and are soon joined by Orton, Bryan and Shawn. There isn’t much special to see here: Orton talks about how he’ll be the face of the WWE after Sunday, Bryan says he’ll prove how great he really is and both guys sign. HHH says that Bryan is just like Edge, Jericho or RVD: popular and talented but not the one. “If any of those guys had been the face of the company back in the day, we’d all be working for Ted Turner right now.” Oh good grief.

Bryan tells HHH to put on some ring gear and he’ll show him how great he can be. HHH says when he gets back in the ring, he’ll be doing it against a star like Undertaker or Rock or Lesnar. Bryan isn’t even worth his time because Bryan is a B+ player. Shawn shouldn’t have wasted his time training Bryan and that’s enough to get Shawn into this chat. He vouches for Bryan and says he’s very good before asking HHH what happened to him.

What happened to the guy that raged against the machine with him? What happened to HHH over the years? Randy is worried, but HHH says Shawn will do what’s right at the end of the day. Shawn says he’ll do what’s right for the business he loves and asks why HHH hates Bryan. Is it because of the beard, or because HHH has been proven wrong?

Orton says Bryan can’t beat him and they get in each others’ faces, but a semi truck is shown on the screen driving into the arena. Big Show is driving and running over various objects in his path. He gets in the arena and does the Bryan finger point while telling Orton to turn around. Bryan lays out Orton with the running knee to end the show. That’s quite the bizarre ending.

Overall Rating: C+. Tonight’s show was a nice change of pace from last wee. They kept things moving tonight and that’s exactly what Raw lacked last week. Nothing really came off as great but they did a decent enough job of setting up what they’ve got for us on Sunday. It still doesn’t feel like an important PPV, but at least they built it up somewhat tonight. So much better than last week.

Results

Daniel Bryan b. Dean Ambrose – YES Lock

Santino Marella b. Heath Slater – Cobra

Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

Bella Twins b. Tamina Snuka/AJ Lee – Bella Buster to Lee

Wyatt Family b. Kofi Kingston/The Miz – Clothesline to Kingston

CM Punk/Big E. Langston b. Curtis Axel/Ryback – Big Ending to Axel

Real Americans b. Tons of Funk – Patriot Lock to Clay

Usos vs. Shield went to a no contest when Cody Rhodes and Goldust interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

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According to WWE you can get 20% off if you use the promo code…..Truth.

Bound For Glory 2013
Date: October 20, 2013
Location: Viejas Arena, San Diego, California
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’ve finally reached the biggest show of the year and while it hasn’t been the greatest build in the world, the night should have some solid wrestling to make up for it. The main event tonight is the winner of the Bound For Glory Series AJ Styles challenging Bully Ray for the world title. Other than that we have a five way Ultimate X match and potentially the return of Hulk Hogan, who may or may not have signed a new contract. Let’s get to it.

Tag Team Gauntlet

It’s a four team gauntlet match with the winning team getting the tag title shot on the PPV. We start with Bad Influence vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero. The Bro Mans will be fourth due to Robbie E. winning a four way on Impact. Eric Young and Joseph Park will be third due to winning a drawing earlier tonight. Hernandez cleans house to start and Bad Influence bails to the floor. We finally get down to Daniels running into a big boot from Hernandez in the corner and take a quick break.

Back with Hernandez hitting an over the shoulder face plant to stop Kazarian’s momentum, allowing for a double tag to Chavo vs. Daniels. Chavo gets two off a headscissors and everything breaks down. Hernandez runs over Bad Influence and hits the big shoulder to run over Kazarian. Daniels low bridges SuperMex to the floor but walks into Three Amigos from Chavo. Not that it matters though as Kaz comes back in to distract Chavo, giving Daniels a rollup with a handful of trunks for the pin at 7:30.

Young and Park are in next but get jumped on the way in. Park runs over Kazarian and slams him down, only to have Daniels chop block him down to give Kazarian control. Bad Influence double teams the big man as the fans chant for Young. Kazarian can’t quite get a sunset flip but avoids a seated senton from the big guy.

We take another break and come back with Eric getting the hot tag and pounding away on Daniels in the corner. Young flips over the corner and does Daniels’ strut down the apron before coming back for a belly to belly and a near fall. Kazarian makes the save and gets sent to the floor, allowing Daniels to hit a release Rock Bottom but miss the BME. Park hits a Samoan Drop on Daniels to give Young the pin at 16:50.

Bad Influence jumps Park and Young post match and sends Park into the Ultimate X structure. The referee calls for help as Park is injured and Young is out cold in the ring. Here come the Bro Mans with special guest Mr. Olympia Phil Heath. It’s basically a handicap match here with Young getting double teamed for a big, only to make a comeback with right hands and forearms. A slam puts Robbie down and Eric drops a top rope elbow for two. The numbers finally catch up with Eric though and a double flapjack sets up a Hart Attack for the pin and the title shot at 22:00.

Rating: C-. Nothing special here but I liked the length of the match. Far too often in these things the falls last about 2 minutes each and are completely unrealistic when you compare them to normal wrestling matches. Having the shortest be seven and a half minutes made this far better. Also anything that keeps Chavo and Hernandez off my screen is a good thing.

The opening video for the PPV is the usual thing you would expect: talking about how this is the culmination of the entire year and everything leads to this night.

X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. Manik vs. Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries vs. Jeff Hardy

This is Ultimate X, meaning there are four towers around the ring with ropes connecting them in an X shape. You have to climb up and crawl across the ropes and pull down the belt to win. Manik is defending coming in but Sabin has been in 16 of these matches. Chris bails to the floor to start, only to have Aries follow him out and send Sabin into the structure. Hardy and Manik head outside as well until Sabin goes in, only to be pounded down by the Samoan. Aries comes back in and sends Joe to the floor to take over.

Jeff starts to climb the structure but hops down to the apron, only to pull Aries down a few seconds later. Manik takes Hardy down and slaps a Sharpshooter kind of move on Sabin, only to have Aries make the save. Austin goes up again but Jeff pulls him down and hits a falling powerbomb facebuster (think a powerbomb but falling backwards instead of forward) before pulling out a ladder. Joe dives through the ropes to knock the ladder into Joe, only to be taken down by Sabin.

Manik drops Sabin but here’s Aries with a huge dive of his own to take everyone out. Aries goes for the belt but the champion comes back in for a save. Manik sends Aries to the floor but here’s Sabin almost immediately. Joe sends Aries back in and pounds away on him in the corner but Austin comes right back with a kick to the head. Hardy and Joe take dropkicks in the corner from Aries but Joe escapes the brainbuster. Aries gets caught in a quick spinning joke but Manik is going for the title, only to be pulled down into a low blow from the Samoan.

Sabin dropkicks Joe into the ropes but Jeff comes in with the Whisper in the Wind to put Chris down. Now the ladder is set up in the middle of the ring but Joe slams Jeff’s head into the top to knock him down. Aries dropkicks Joe down but Manik springboards up to the ropes and then the ladder, only to have Sabin shove the ladder and both of them over. Hardy hits the Twist of Fate to take Sabin down but can’t follow up. Sabin sends his girlfriend Velvet Sky in to make the save but it’s just a distraction for Sabin to go up and win the belt at 12:00.

Rating: C+. The match was fun but that’s a pretty lame ending. I know it’s a heel move from Sabin, but it was Hardy that brought the ladder in to start. The ending was really lackluster and the match lacked a lot of the drama that these matches had. I don’t think there was even one near finish which made it feel like it came out of nowhere.

We’re going to be seeing great AJ Styles moments tonight with the fist being Styles winning the first X-Division Title in 2002.

Here’s Bad Influence to fill in some time because there are only six matches tonight. Kazarian says that it’s a shame they’re not on the card tonight. Daniels says they’re the stepchildren of this company despite the fact that they ARE TNA. They beat Chavo and Hernandez earlier, Young and Park are a fisherman and a lawyer so they shouldn’t count, and since this company is obsessed with multiple people in matches, let’s make the tag title match a threeway.

This brings out Eric Young who says he isn’t looking for a fight because he already beat them tonight. He says he’s a scientist and the two of them did something earlier tonight which created a monster. They should run but instead Young gets double teamed. Cue the returning Abyss to clean house. Bad Influence is taken out and Abyss helps Eric up. Remember when Park and Young beat Bad Influence on the preshow? Well they just did it again here, just not in an actual match.

James Storm and Gunner say they’re ready to defend the titles against the jokes that are the Bro Mans.

Tag Titles: Bro Mans vs. James Storm/Gunner

Robbie E. and Jesse Godderz still have Mr. Olympia Phil Heath with them. The champions run the goofs over to start and send them out to the floor so Gunner can backdrop Storm over the top onto the Bro Mans. We officially start with Storm throwing Jesse around with a hiptoss before it’s off to Gunner. An elbow to the face and a slingshot suplex get two each on Jesse before Robbie gets in a shot from the apron to take over. Robbie comes in and pounds away on Gunner before getting two off a dropkick.

Gunner comes back with a jumping knee to the face but Jesse runs in to knock James off the apron. Robbie drags Gunner back into the challengers’ corner before bringing Jesse back in. Gunner comes right back with a quick fallaway slam and the hot tag brings in Storm. James cleans house and gets two on Robbie off a running neckbreaker. The Bro Mans get their act together and load up a double superplex on James, only to have Gunner pull James off into an electric chair.

Robbie is taken down by a front suplex, allowing James to drop a top rope elbow for two. Storm has a nasty cut on the side of his leg and Robbie scores with a quick Edgecution for two. Gunner loads up Robbie in the Gun Rack but Robbie makes the save, only to get caught in a powerbomb. Storm adds a Backstabber but Jesse makes the save at the last second. James hits the Last Call on Jesse but Robbie throws in a title belt for a distraction, allowing the Bro Mans to hit the Hart Attack for the pin and the titles at 11:48.

Rating: C. This was better than I was expecting but it’s not like it means anything long term. The tag division means nothing at all and if time has proven one thing, it’s that one team can hardly ever breathe life back into belts that a company isn’t interested in pushing. The near fall off the superkick was really good but other than that it was your basic tag match.

Video from the Hall of Fame induction last night including Sting with a bare face in a rare sight.

Here’s Sting to induct Angle into the Hall of Fame. Sting talks about how so many people respect Kurt because of what he does in and out of the ring. Kurt comes out and thanks everyone before pausing for a THANK YOU ANGLE chant. Sting says it’s time to induct him, but Angle says that he has to decline. He’s setting a new standard for the industry because what’s he’s accomplished before will be nothing compared to what he has in the future. He’ll join Sting one day though. The fans are stunned and Sting doesn’t look pleased.

AJ Styles won the world title at No Surrender 2009.

Dixie gets a phone call and says she wants all of AJ’s merchandise on sale. Ethan Carter, Dixie’s nephew, comes up behind her for his debut. Apparently Dixie has a match for him tonight and they have a family motto: “The world needs us. We’re the Carters.”

Knockouts Title: ODB vs. Brooke vs. Gail Kim

ODB is defending. Brooke looks GREAT in a leather version of her usual attire. Gail is knocked to the floor to start with Brooke taking over on ODB in the corner. Brooke gives her a Stink Face but ODB pops up and sends her into the corner for a Bronco Buster. Gail comes back in, only to be knocked back to the floor a few seconds later. Brooke works on ODB’s back and gets two off a quick neckbreaker.

Gail pops back up and grabs the figure four around the post, only to have ODB make the save with her chest. ODB chops Brooke but gets rolled up for a quick two. Off to a half crab on Brooke but Gail makes another save. The challengers both go up but have to shove off a double superplex attempt, followed by Gail hitting a missile dropkick on ODB. Brooke adds a top rope elbow (WAY too popular of a move tonight) for no cover.

Back up and ODB gets two on Gail via a delayed vertical suplex. The referee gets taken out as ODB somehow gets both girls up in a fireman’s carry at the same time. Brooke falls off but ODB slams Gail onto her….and here’s Tapa. She runs over ODB and takes her out, only to powerbomb Gail on top of ODB for the pin and the title at 10:33.

Rating: D+. This could have been on any given Impact and that’s the problem with this show: nothing feels special at all so far. Gail is champion again. So? She’s been champion before, just like everyone else in the division. Nothing to see here other than Brooke looking great.

Gail hugs Tapa to reveal a ruse.

The Bro Mans celebrate.

Bobby is shocked at Angle turning the induction down and is going to prove why he’s the better man tonight.

We recap Angle vs. Roode, which is all over Roode being inducted into the EGO Hall of Fame, ticking off now non-Hall of Famer Kurt. This is Angle’s first match back from rehab.

Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode

Angle has a bad shoulder coming in. Feeling out process to start with Angle taking it to the mat but having to bail to the floor to avoid the Crossface. Back in and Angle tries the ankle lock but Bobby rolls through to send Angle back to the floor. Bobby takes over on the floor but Angle takes him down with a suplex. Back in and Roode scores with a quick hotshot to put Kurt back on the floor before going after the neck even more.

Roode takes him back inside and works the neck with clotheslines and shots to the back of the head. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Kurt fights his way up and rolls the Germans for the first time in several months. A belly to belly gets two but Roode armdrags out of the Angle Slam. Roode scores with the spinebuster for two but Angle slips out of a fireman’s carry and grabs the ankle lock.

Bobby slips out of the hold again and sends Kurt shoulder first into the post before loading up the Crossface. Kurt fights up and gets a quick ankle lock, only to have Roode roll over into the Crossface again. Angle almost tape but turns it over into traded rollups for two each. Back up again and Angle tries a clothesline, only to get caught in the Crossface for the third time.

Angle fights up again and gets an Angle Slam for a VERY close two. Both guys are down now with Angle holding his arm. They slap it out from their knees with Angle getting the better of it before grabbing more Rolling Germans. Roode shoves the referee away so he can kick Kurt low to take over again.

Roode busts out an Attitude Adjustment of all things (I’m shocked no one has stolen that move yet) for two but Kurt is able to slap on the ankle lock yet again. Roode tries to kick Kurt away like he did earlier but Angle holds on and hooks the grapevine. Bobby is no Brock Lesnar and can’t make the rope so he passes out, but as the referee lifts the arm it falls onto the rope for the break. Kurt is ticked off so he loads up Roode into a SUPER ANGLE SLAM but he can’t follow up. Roode gets to his feet at nine and falls into a cover for the surprise pin at 21:00.

Rating: B+. This is the kind of match the show needed. Roode winning is the right call and the stuff at the end was really solid. The opening part of the match was dull but at least the right guy won to avenge the loss he had two years ago. Angle didn’t need the win at all so Roode winning is definitely the right call.

Post match Angle still isn’t moving so medics come out to check on him. Angle won’t let them put a neck brace on and gets off a stretcher to walk out on his own.

AJ beat Sting at Bound For Glory 2009.

Bully says tonight is about the Aces and 8’s being reborn. There are a bunch of guys whose faces we can’t see with Ray implying it’s all the old members coming back tonight.

Ethan Carter III vs. Norv Fernum

Carter is former WWE talent Derrick Bateman. Fervum is apparently a local guy and looks to weigh about 150lbs. Carter runs him over to start and forearms his way out of a wristlock. A t-bone suplex takes Fervum down and it’s off to a one arm camel clutch. Norv fights up and hits some shoulder blocks and a pair of dropkicks followed by a top rope cross body for two. Ethan hits a quick Bulldog Driver to end Fervum at 3:28.

Rating: D-. Carter has a good look but this wasn’t needed on a PPV at all. That’s the problem with this whole show as I mentioned earlier: this doesn’t feel like anything special. We’ve had a promo with a return earlier and now an added squash match just to pad in the time. That’s not a good sign at all.

Magnus says this is the new biggest night of his life and he’s not going to leave without until he knocks the door down. He has everything to lose tonight and it makes him feel more dangerous.

We recap Sting vs. Magnus. Magnus blew the BFG Series finals and thinks he can’t do it, so Sting is going to give him a chance tonight.

Sting vs. Magnus

Feeling out process to start with Sting sending Magnus out to the floor in frustration. Back in and Magnus sends him into the corner for some shoulder blocks. We hit a body scissors as Magnus is being rather aggressive here. Back up and Magnus drives in shoulders to the ribs but gets caught in a backdrop so Sting can pound away. There’s a quick Stinger Splash and we’re already in the Scorpion Deathlock less than five minutes in.

Magnus kicks away and a double clothesline puts both guys down. The Brit hits a quick Stinger Splash of his own and gets two off the falcon’s arrow. Sting kicks away from the Cloverleaf and hits another Stinger Splash before putting on the Deathlock again. As usual Sting doesn’t sit down on it at all so Magnus is able to crawl over to the ropes. Stinger Splash number three lands on an uppercut and Magnus hits a Scorpion Death Drop on his own to set up the top rope elbow.

Sting kicks out at two and is able to avoid the second top rope elbow, putting both guys down again. Magnus fires off some hard forearms but Sting says bring it. Sting gets taken down into the Cloverleaf with Magnus actually cranking on the hold….for the submission at 11:02. I NEVER remember Sting tapping before.

Rating: C. Not a great match but the ending couldn’t have been better for Magnus. Sting gave up in the center of the ring without a bit of cheating at all. Good match here and the ending was the perfectly right call, but the match didn’t feel like it had a middle part which hurt it a bit.

Magnus leaves without shaking Sting’s hand.

AJ won the BFG Series this year.

Bully quotes Guns N Roses by saying welcome to his jungle. He doesn’t want AJ to die though. Instead he wants AJ to have to go back to Georgia and tell his family why he lost tonight. More greatness from the champion here.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray, which is almost all about AJ vs. Dixie. AJ won the title shot in the BFG Series but the main story is about Dixie Carter not wanting a hick like AJ as the world champion. She’s promised tonight is his last night in the company.

TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray

This is No DQ and No Countout. AJ’s music is the full dark theme this time and doesn’t break into Get Ready To Fly. After the big match intros we’re ready to go. Ray talks a lot of trash to start and slams AJ down with ease. AJ is thrown around again and his wristlock is broken up by a HARD clothesline. Ray shouts about smelling fear on AJ for years now, which motivates AJ into a dropkick.

Styles hooks the Calf Killer out of nowhere, drawing out Garrett Bischoff for a distraction for the break. It’s going to be one of those matches isn’t it. Garrett slides Ray the hammer but AJ kicks it away and grabs the hammer for himself. Ray blocks it with a chop and hits an even harder one for good measure. AJ says hit me again and Ray is stunned, allowing Styles to fire off some right hands. Ray chops him again but AJ says bring it. AJ goes after the leg but as he goes up, here’s Knux for another distraction. Styles dives at him but gets caught in a chokeslam to give Ray two.

Ray yells at Earl Hebner for the near fall so Earl yells back, only to have Ray miss a shot and take out Knux by mistake. Ray punches AJ down and then kicks him to the floor with the hammer going out too. The champion gets the hammer but AJ kicks him in the head, knocking Ray to the table. AJ grabs the hammer but throws it down and rams Ray into the table instead. Styles loads up a springboard 450 but Ray moves, sending AJ crashing through the table in a SCARY landing.

With Earl seeing if AJ can remember what planet he’s on, Taz hands Ray a box cutter so he can cut up the ring like he did at Slammiversary. The wood under the mat is revealed as AJ is trying to crawl back into the ring. Ray calls for someone to come out to the ring and here comes Dixie. She looks scared but Ray tells her to get a chair. Dixie demands one from security but AJ springboards in with the forearm to drive the chair into Bully’s head.

There’s the springboard 450 but Dixie tells Earl to count slowly. After about 20 seconds Earl gets to two and Ray kicks out. Ray backdrops out of the Styles Clash to send AJ back first into the wood but doesn’t cover. Ray’s middle rope backsplash actually connects but AJ is up at two. The fans aren’t really caring that much about these near falls. Bully blasts him twice in the back with the chair but AJ rolls out of a powerbomb and Peles Ray down. AJ blasts Ray in the head with the chair and there’s the Spiral Tap for the pin and the title at 20:34.

Rating: C. This wasn’t so much about would AJ win but how would he win. I do however have one question: can we PLEASE have a main event not be overbooked? These two have shown they can have a good match together without all the nonsense, but apparently that’s not allowed anymore. It doesn’t work when we saw this at Slammiversary and the luster was kind of gone here. Also, where were the extra Aces that Ray had? Where did Garrett go? At this point though, I’d take anything decent as a main event and that’s what this was: decent but not great.

A long highlight package of the main event and AJ celebrating in the crowd ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. That’s being really generous too. The main events were decent to good, but this show can be summed up in four words: not bad, seen better. That’s the problem with everything tonight: everything on this show has been done better before. TNA is just such a mess at this point and nothing on here made me want to see what’s happening going forward. AJ vs. Dixie does nothing for me and the reaction to Dixie as the top heel has been bad to say the least.

The build coming into this show was pretty dreadful with almost none of the matches feeling like they meant anything. The X Title and Knockouts Title matches were thrown together, the Tag Title match was literally made tonight and the World Title was secondary to AJ vs. Dixie. The wrestling was passable for the most part but the biggest show of the year should blow the doors off instead of just being passable. This show just didn’t work tonight and I really don’t like where TNA looks to be going in the near or far future.

Also, this sums up TNA right now.  This is during Sting vs. Magnus (thank KJ):

Results

Chris Sabin b. Manik, Samoa Joe, Jeff Hardy and Austin Aries – Sabin pulled down the title

Bro Mans b. James Storm/Gunner – Hart Attack to Storm

Gail Kim b. Brooke and ODB – Kim pinned Brooke after a powerbomb from Lei’D Tapa

Bobby Roode b. Kurt Angle – Roode pinned Angle after Angle hit a top rope Angle Slam

Ethan Carter III b. Norv Fernum – Bulldog driver

Magnus b. Sting – Cloverleaf

AJ Styles b. Bully Ray – Spiral Tap

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No Mercy 2002
Date: October 20, 2002
Location: Alltel Arena, North Little Rock, Arkansas
Attendance: 9,074
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This was requested by someone and I can’t remember who. In name only this seems like a weak card but it’s actually pretty stacked. We have HHH vs. Kane in a title unification match, the match of the year with Edge/Mysterio vs. Benoit/Angle for the first Smackdown tag titles and Hell in a Cell with Lesnar vs. Taker. Let’s get to it.

Nothing special in the opening video. THERE WILL BE NO MERCY! Yeah that’s all they’ve got.

Raw Tag Titles: Chris Jericho/Christian vs. Booker T/Goldust

The Canadians have the titles. Four separate entrances here which is kind of odd. Christian and Jericho just won the belts this past week on Raw. Booker vs. Christian starts us off. Christian is a glorified lower card guy at this point having been more or less completely left in the dust by Edge despite him having a title and Edge not at the moment. It sounds odd but it’s completely true.

Flying hips to the face of the Canadians keep Goldust in control. Jericho gets a middle rope dropkick as that first little bit was kind of quickly done and not in a good way. The fans are way behind Booker T. Goldust avoids a Christian dropkick and gets a rollup for two followed by a powerslam. No tag though as I guess he’s playing the face in peril here. Before I finished that sentence Booker comes in.

Apparently Booker and Jericho are feuding at this point so there’s your reasoning for the match I guess. You knew it wasn’t just because they’re both good tag teams right? Booker dominates for the most part here as he’s the hottest thing in the match and would get a title shot at Mania.

Back over to Goldust who hits Shattered Dreams on Christian and continues to abuse the balls of Christian by getting a drop toehold onto Jericho to send him into his partner’s crotch. Axe kick to Jericho gets two as Christian saves. Booker gets the missile dropkick and it’s Spinarooni time. Jericho goes for his running springboard dropkick but the ropes break. Well doesn’t that suck. Jericho bulldogs Goldust onto a title belt and hits a moonsault off the top to retain.

Rating: C-. You can’t hold the ropes breaking against them here but this match wasn’t very entertaining. It’s ok but it really is a Raw match with a bit more time on PPV. It wasn’t much at all with Goldust and Booker being a glorified comedy team as this is a backdrop for the Booker vs. Jericho feud which I’m never a fan of. Not terrible though.

Funaki, Smackdown NUMBER ONE announcer, is with Al Wilson. This was during the Dawn Marie marries Al Wilson to tick off Torrie. This resulted in Al “dying” and Dawn making out with Torrie in a lesbian/semi-incest angle that was insanely hot but irritating at the same time. This is WAY too long as they show a bunch of clips but they have to fix the ring so we have hot women to look at I guess. It results in a Bill Clinton joke of all things.

Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie

They’re not even called Divas all the time yet. Sweet GOODNESS Cole looks toolish here. The girls look great though. Torrie drills her to start and it’s on early. This is when the girls were just AWFUL in the ring. It’s this era and the next 2-3 years where the bad stereotypes come from. Torrie kept getting ring time and looked like a rookie in her first match for the better part of three years.

Dawn drops a head into the crotch of Torrie and Tazz wonders if that actually hurts. This is just freaking terrible. Rolling catfight spot as this is going nowhere at all. They can’t even do clotheslines right. YOU STICK YOUR ARM OUT. Why is this getting extended time??? Finally Torrie wins with a swinging neckbreaker.

Rating: D-. Girls looking this hot can’t be a failure. That’s all it’s got going for it though and I want to get away from it as fast as I can.

RVD says Flair is awesome and lists off some catchphrases of Naitch. He even struts and woos and does his own version of the limousine riding bit. It’s MUCH funnier than it sounds and it helps that Flair is a walking cartoon character.

In the same shot we see Brock and Heyman showing up and they have no comment. There’s also a decent looking woman named Tracy that is accusing Taker of being a cheater in his marriage. Actually that’s true but who cares about reality?

Ric Flair vs. Rob Van Dam

Flair is heel here and Evolution isn’t quite formed yet but would show up on February 3 of the following year (no I’m not that big of a geek. That’s my birthday). At Unforgiven (JR says Vengeance) Flair turned heel and hit RVD in the stomach with a sledgehammer to save HHH’s title. They go at it on the floor for a bit and Flair’s shoulder goes into the post before the bell rings.

Or has the match started already? Top rope dropkick hits Flair as the bell rings. Ok so it hadn’t started yet. Flair is only 53 here so he’s still a young dude in theory I guess. Flair takes out the knee and we’re officially in the Flair Formula. The main talking point is that Van Dam said he flies coach in the prematch promo. Lawler will not shut up about it and it’s kind of annoying. Yes Lawler is getting annoying. I’m stunned too.

The standard Flair beating goes on for a LONG time. And now we’re talking about the Tracy girl. Well sure why not. We get to the Figure Four after maybe three minutes and naturally it doesn’t end the thing since Flair is a heel and he loses the ability to win with a submission. Van Dam makes his comeback as this is borderline predictable.

Ross slips in his more time on the canvas than Rembrandt line as Flair is slammed off the top. Rolling Thunder gets two as Flair gets a foot on the ropes. And then there’s the Five Star to actually end it. It’s kind of weird to see Flair just jobbing cleanly like that. Most odd indeed.

Rating: D+. You’ve seen it once and you’ve seen it 1000 times. And yes I know how ironic that is given the last thing I said about the ending. This again belonged on Raw and not here but that’s typical for the most part. This went nowhere for the most part as Flair at least is almost good for putting someone over. Pretty weak match though.

Show is talking to Stephanie and Bischoff comes up to complain about it. Show wanted to leave Raw but Eric wouldn’t let him. He would be there by Survivor Series and a heel under Heyman’s leadership.

Since the IC Title dies tonight we get a video package on the history of the title. Cool stuff.

Cruiserweight Title: Tajiri vs. Jamie Noble

Noble is champion here. Tajiri was the referee in a Noble/Nidia match on Smackdown for no apparent reason so Noble beat him up afterwards. Tajiri gets a baseball slide before the bell rings as that’s a running theme lately. Asai Moonsault hits and that’s about the extent of Tajiri’s offense for awhile.

Nice electric chair by Noble gets two. Pretty much domination by the champion so far. Tazz and Cole imply these three are in a three way relationship or something but that never went anywhere. The commentary is far more sexual in nature than what you would be used to in WWE today.

Jamie gets knocked off the top rope as he tries a suplex so Tajiri gets to miss a moonsault now. He does get a tornado DDT but doesn’t cover for no apparent reason. Both guys down now. Both guys up now. Tajiri unleashes that martial arts rush which is always awesome. Handspring elbow has Jamie in big trouble. German suplex gets two.

There’s the Tarantula and Jamie is reeling. Big kick misses and the Tiger Bomb is countered. There’s the kick and Nidia kisses the referee so he can’t make the count. And there’s the Tiger Bomb for two which is surprising. Tajiri goes for a victory roll but Nidia trips him so Jamie can dive into it for the Owen Hart at Mania X pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here and at least they allowed Tajiri to get in more offense than it looked like he was going to get. It’s nothing great or anything like that but this was definitely watchable and the whole thing worked pretty well. It’s a shame no one cared about this or it might have been interesting.

Tajiri kisses her post match. Noble kisses her too. Tajiri kicks the living heck out of him while he does though.

Benoit is looking for Eddie and says that Angle is kicking Chavo’s teeth in at the moment. Eddie goes off to find him and Benoit follows. Eddie finds the door they’re behind and makes noises with his mouth. Eddie thinks Benoit is faking so that Angle can take him down.

It’s clearly Chavo yelling but Eddie says that sounds like a little girl. And then Angle throws Chavo through the door. This was…..uh yeah. Apparently they did the same thing on Smackdown and Angle was suckering Eddie in. Out of context this is nuts but that makes sense.

We recap the monster Kane face push that resulted him in being the IC Champion and getting the shot at HHH here because it’s winner take all since WWE decided there was going to be one title per show for no apparent reason at all. Kane talked about being all happy for the first time in his life. And then, HHH asked Kane about Katie Vick.

Yes it’s THAT Katie Vick. The idea was that there was some chick that Kane knew (despite allegedly being burned horribly and never knowing anyone but Paul Bearer). He drove her home one night and they wrecked, killing her. Then HHH went to a funeral home and simulated sex with a mannequin while wearing a Kane mask, implying that Kane raped her corpse. This might be the lowest the company ever got.

Raw World Title/Intercontinental Title: HHH vs. Kane

Since Lesnar had gone to Smackdown as the Undisputed Champion the World Heavyweight Championship had been made for HHH as the Raw title. That was last month so the ending is pretty clear here. We hear the stupid line of that title dating back to 1904 (it was 1905 until they decided it was 04 when HHH got it) which is complete nonsense.

In short, the NWA Title was unified with a title that dated back to 1905. That title LOOKS like the NWA Title so it has the same lineage. That’s the extent of the WWE’s logic. Lawler says Kane needs Liquid Courage to face HHH. Well it would certainly help him with his covers. And now onto the match.

Kane pushes him around to start and then drills HHH. An amusing thing here is that Lawler keeps calling Kane the Animal. Batista was either already on Smackdown or would be debuting any week now. I think he’s already there though. All Kane so far. He beats on HHH for about the first three minutes more or less non stop. HHH gets a bad reverse neckbreaker to take Kane down. Naturally he sits up to take care of that.

Facebuster buys HHH some time and he sends Kane to the floor. Back in the ring and HHH hits another neckbreaker. Make that three. Dang he sticks to stuff he likes doesn’t he? Ross says if Kane wins he’ll be the first masked World’s Heavyweight Champion. I guess they’re pushing that whole separate titles thing. Spinebuster puts Kane down again.

HHH keeps up the offense on the neck and throat with a slingshot up into the middle rope to keep Kane down even longer. Off to a sleeper now and Kane is reeling. Down he goes as Lawler makes death jokes. Those are pretty creepy actually. This match is pretty plodding and not much is going on here at all. Sidewalk Slam by Kane gets no cover as he’s broken the sleeper and is in control again.

Top rope clothesline hits and here’s Ric Flair because a title match can’t be clean right? Down goes the referee and Flair won’t leave. What a shocker. Belt to Kane’s face gets a two without much drama at all. Hurricane, Kane’s partner, comes out and beats up Flair but walks into a Pedigree. Kane sits up and it’s on again.

HHH comes off the middle and top rope and neither of them work. Chokeslam is blocked and down goes the referee again. To the floor now and HHH takes a chokeslam through the Spanish Announce Table. Flair comes in with the sledgehammer but Kane stops it. HHH gets a low blow and a hammer shot but walks into a chokeslam. Flair (again) breaks up the pin and takes a chokeslam as a result. Back in and HHH hits the Pedigree to retain and retire the IC Title.

Rating: D. This more or less is what would happen in Raw World Title matches for the vast majority of the next year and a half. HHH would get dominated by a big guy but then Flair and the sledgehammer would come into play and HHH would of course retain. Kane more or less was done for a good while after this as he didn’t get to do anything because it was world title or nothing. That was the stupid part of the whole thing but it took about 9 months for them to realize it. The match sucked due to all of the garbage in it though.

Stephanie talks to the Tracy girl about the Undertaker thing and she admits Heyman made the whole thing up and she’s just going along with it. They had a relationship before he married Taker. This is “confidentially between the two of them.” I guess the camera means nothing.

We recap the tag team tournament and basically the two teams have been flying through the whole thing and are unstoppable. If Benoit and Angle fight they’re both suspended for a year.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Rey Mysterio/Edge vs. Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle

This was the undisputed match of the year so this more or less has to be awesome. Edge is about as hot as possible here and Rey is pretty new here. Yeah he had been around only three months or so here. Edge is just straight up awesome here and the whole thing is just greatness. Angle vs. Rey to start us off. We have what, about 25 world titles in there? Angle takes him to the mat and slaps him in the back of the head to be a jerk.

Kurt is really the only heel in this match. He literally throws Rey into his own corner because he wants a grownup apparently. Rey won’t tag out though because he wants Angle. They had a great opener at Summerslam so this works for me. Rey can’t get out of much of anything so he steps on Kurt’s foot and hits him with what can only be called an FU.

He busts out the speed and slaps Angle in the back of the head just like Kurt did earlier. The announce table being in pieces is funny for some reason. Here’s Edge to a big old pop. This is before Edge hurt his neck so he’s a totally different worker here. Off to Benoit now. Expect a LOT of play by play here as if the reviews I’ve heard are any indication there isn’t going to be much to make fun of.

The Canadians do a much more technical sequence and it’s a lot more entertaining than you would think a side headlock should be. Edge gets a knee to Benoit’s ribs and focuses on them for a while. Flapjack and a rollup get two. And there’s a knee from Kurt as Edge hits the ropes to give Benoit an advantage. They try the same thing again but Edge spears him this time.

Benoit and Angle double team Edge in a very nice sequence. Back to Angle now. The fans are all over him which is always good to hear. Better for them to be making noise at all than to be bored. Rear naked choke to Edge and Rey is getting antsy. Tazz adds in something by saying Angle is making sure Edge is facing his partner to mess with his head. Nicely done Mr. suplex machine.

Edge gets a big boot but walks into a belly to belly for two and here’s Chris again. Here are the rolling Germans as Edge is getting the tar beaten out of him. Benoit goes a little heel by drilling Rey to keep him from making the save. Benoit goes up for the headbutt and down he comes off a big old superplex.

There’s the big tag to Rey and he cranks things WAY up. The good thing is that he’s in there against two guys that can do the same thing. He sets Benoit for a Bronco Buster but goes with a running dropkick instead. HUH-FREAKING-ZAH! Rey and Benoit crank things up ever more but Benoit gets a counter and hooks up the Crossface until Edge finally saves.

Edge vs. Angle on the floor along with Benoit and Rey in the ring. 619 is blocked by Benoit but Edge hits a missile dropkick to drive Rey onto Benoit for a long two. This is all happening at a very fast pace. Rey goes up but Angle JUMPS from the mat to the top for the HUGE belly to belly off the top for another long two. Benoit’s face is like WHAT at that.

Angle in now vs. Rey as things slow down a bit. Rey starts a bit of a comeback but gets caught in a quick suplex and crashes for two. Back to the short and crazy Canadian now. After more of a beating Rey gets a headscissors to send Benoit into the post and we get double tags to bring in Edge vs. Kurt. Edge-O-Matic gets two and everyone is back in again.

Spear in the corner to Benoit and there’s the Bronco Buster. I withdraw my former HUZZAH! Spear in the corner again to Angle and Edge sits him on the middle rope. Rey runs at Edge who throws him into the air for a big old rana. Benoit looks to save with the diving headbutt but it crushes Angle and only gets two. Angle busts out a German from nowhere for two. He shouts at Edge to go to the middle which Edge does.

In a VERY nice spot, Rey runs at Edge who belly to bellies him into Angle to take down the bald one. That’s what he gets for calling spots that loudly. Benoit saves the spear and grabs the Crossface and Edge is in trouble but he gets a rope. He won’t let go so Rey hits a 619 out of somewhere. Angle Slam takes out Rey and Angle locks on the ankle lock.

Edge kicks off and grabs a small package for two. Spear gets two as Benoit saves and Rey takes out Benoit. Rey gets a running start at Edge again and Edge catches him and gives him a very nice launch into a moonsault to take out Benoit. SICK counter out of the Edgecution by Angle into the ankle lock. Edge counters that into an ankle lock of his own but Angle is all like OH NO YOU DIDN’T and counters into an ankle lock for the tap out and the titles. Sweet goodness as Cole says he’s going to applaud them for it.

Rating: A+. OH YES. Now this is what you get when you have two teams out there that are young and moving as fast as they can to make something look awesome. Smackdown was supposed to be the wrestling show back then and it certainly was.

These four plus Brock and Eddie were known as the Smackdown Six and were more or less there to have great matches every week. This is another fine example of it and it worked like a charm. Great match with some INSANE counters and saves and double teaming. Go watch it. Like now.

A doctor tells Taker that he shouldn’t give Taker a shot in the broken hand/wrist that he has. Nice to see him getting this maybe 15 minutes before the match starts.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Sweet merciful goodness Trish looks amazingly good tonight. She’s in her standard stuff but the blue with the long blonde hair and the big smile is WORKING. Victoria is currently known as Tara in TNA. Total bring the crowd down match after the awesome match they just had. Victoria is a bit more hardcore than the rest of the Divas. Trish was pretty good in the ring by this point and can more than carry herself.

You can tell that Trish has talent as she’s not afraid to go after Victoria here and clearly looks comfortable out there doing what she’s doing. When you watch the Divas today for the most part they clearly have to stop and make sure they’re doing everything right. With Trish like most of the male wrestlers, you can see she’s mostly going on instinct which is the better way of doing things.

Victoria in control here as she hits a front flip slingshot legdrop and then botches the living heck out of a monkey flip to the extent that Trish landed on Victoria rather than hitting the mat. Victoria throws on an old school backbreaker which is the kind where they throw the other girl over her shoulder and pulls down. A big spinning sideslam gets no cover so Trish gets an electric chair drop for two. Chick Kick gets two before a neckbreaker and rollup end it.

Rating: D. This was just there but the sloppiness of it hurt things. Trish was getting a lot better but still wasn’t as great as she would get. Victoria wasn’t a character yet and was just a bit nuts and said that Trish slept her way to the top of the fitness modeling world. She would get the title the next month in a hardcore match. This was pretty much nothing.

Post match Victoria kicks the blonde’s head off.

We get a clip of Rikishi being thrown off the top of the Cell in 2000. Rikishi is at the World (WWE nightclub/restaurant) and says the match is no joke. He predicts Taker wins it.

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Taker vs. Lesnar. They had a match at Unforgiven where Taker lost by DQ when he threw Brock through the set. In short he just didn’t want to put Lesnar over so they gave them two matches in a row. Lesnar has been champion for two months here so this is his second major title defense. Brock broke Taker’s hand and we threw in that Tracy chick who meant nothing apparently. This gets the music video treatment.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. The Undertaker

In the Cell remember. Taker keeps lunging at Brock and gets taken to the mat for his trouble. Big powerslam gets two for the champion and there’s the cast to Lesnar’s ribs after he misses a charge in the corner. Brock tries to escape but can’t get out so he hammers on the arm instead. He goes with an armbar which isn’t something you often see in a Cell match.

Taker blasts him in the head with it which is a double edged sword. Actually it’s a hard cast but you get the metaphor. Brock is busted BAD. Heyman is all freaked out. Brock is bleeding but there’s been worse in ECW so I guess he’s mellowed. They hit the floor and Taker beats the tar out of him and covers on the floor for two. You can do that? I don’t remember that before.

More cast shots which all of a sudden don’t hurt him. I guess he’s lucky that the shot he got kicked in sometime between the first big shot with it and this set of them. Lesnar gets put in place for the apron legdrop but Taker goes up and drops a knee (I think) from the top instead for two on the floor again. Heyman shouts at Brock to get away from Taker. Taker kicks Heyman through the cage in a nice shot.

He follows that up by grabbing Paul’s tie and pulling on it to slam him into the cage. Taker gets out of the way of a charging Brock who crashes into Heyman too. Dang he’s taken a beating tonight. Brock gets a good shot in though and sends him into the cage. Heyman is busted open too. He slips his belt in and ties Taker up with it so Lesnar can annihilate him a bit. Heyman shouting YOU’RE GONNA DIE is great stuff.

Lesnar, a 300lb beast, swings a chair about ten times to drill Taker’s hand each time. So in other words, Taker is probably in need of major surgery now on it. Let’s see if it hurts at all. Brock gets the cast off or at least tries to. Heyman sounds demonic out there. There goes the cast completely as they’re actually in the ring now.

In a cool spot, Brock sits him on the top rope and uses the top of the cage to lift himself up and throw kicks at Taker. Taker blocks a superplex despite being more or less dead. He knocks Lesnar to the mat and manages to drop an elbow off the top with the right hand and seems to be just fine. Shocking isn’t it? I’m not used to seeing Taker’s bare hand. Taker kicks Brock into the cage and has momentum again.

Taker dives through the ropes and more or less completely misses but Brock sells it anyway. Cole thinks Taker’s broken right hand could be a weakness for him. Wow indeed. Steps to the head take Taker down again and busts him open. More steps to the head and Taker is more or less done. His face is COVERED in blood.

Back in the ring Brock gets a big spinebuster for two. ZERO pop for the kickout. And naturally Taker is able to throw big right hands and is “running on adrenaline” apparently. Oh give me a break. The blood on the camera is always a nice touch. Old School is blocked and Brock takes over again. Tazz: Undertaker has never been pinned or submitted. What the heck is this guy on?

F5 is reversed into a chokeslam for two which gets a bigger pop than the kickout did a minute ago. Brock goes for a Last Ride and is reversed. DDT gets two. Sweet GOODNESS Taker is bleeding badly. Brock does the punches in the corner which Taker counters with the Last Ride for two as Brock’s bloody hand grabs the rope.

In something SICK on the cover, Taker’s blood drips onto Brock’s face. That’s not good at all and really isn’t safe in the slightest. That’s a big reason as to why the blood policy is a good thing. Taker goes for the Tombstone and Brock is like screw this let’s end it and counters it before literally throwing Taker onto his shoulders for the F5 to retain. We then get what is supposed to be an iconic scene as he grabs the title and climbs to the top of the Cell where he holds it over his head to end the show.

Rating: C. Hard one to call here as the match itself is more or less crap. It’s about 27 minutes long and at least 15 of that is spent on the floor. Taker’s hand thing was eye rolling levels of stupid as all of a sudden a shot is able to heal 5 chair shots from Brock Lesnar to a broken hand. Brock looked great here, but the main reason this is a decent grade is the blood.

If you like bloody matches, RUN out and find a copy of this show. Taker’s blood is absolutely insane as you can’t see his face and it looks like there’s a hole in his forehead. It’s a big brawl but Taker was really looking bad out there, both from how his face looked to how he was working. I didn’t like the match, but the blood was insane.

Overall Rating: D+. This isn’t quite a one match show but it’s very close. The tag match is required viewing, but other than that there isn’t anything absolutely worth seeing. The Cell match is a very case by case basis of whether or not you should watch it. Other than that though everything here is very hit or miss and nothing you couldn’t find anywhere with relative ease. This show isn’t terrible, but it’s not very good. Tag title match is absolutely worth seeing though. Other than that, not really worth it.

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NXT
Date: October 19, 2011
Location: Mexican Sports Palace, Mexico City, Mexico
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

Obviously we’re in Mexico now and we only have two people left. The Young suspension may be a blessing in disguise as it might give them an opening to round out this season after the thirty two weeks they’ve had so far. After last week there aren’t any major loose ends that need to be tied up so maybe there’s a means to an end now. Let’s get to it.

We start in the ring….WITH A CHALLENGE??? Striker has a rope and there are flags around the ring ropes (not the one Striker is holding). It’s a capture the flag challenge. There are only O’Neil and Bateman left. This is worth 15 points to really make sure we make the rest of the challenges before this worthless by comparison. They both have on weightlifting belts and there’s a rope attached on their backs. Whoever can get the most flags wins. And after about 15 seconds Bateman jumps Titus and leaves him laying. Titus wins and the main event tonight is Titus/Percy vs. Bateman and whoever Bateman picks.

Tyler Reks vs. Yoshi Tatsu

Hawkins is limping to the rings with Reks. Reks and Hawkins complain about the injury and Reks sounds nothing like his looks would make you expect. Reks overpowers him to start so Tatsu chops away. Yoshi snaps off a spinwheel kick to take over so Reks, being a modern WWE heel, hides. Reks takes over again and the fans don’t seem all that impressed by him.

An O’Connor Roll doesn’t work for Tatsu and Reks works on the back a bit. Tatsu responds by hitting a big kick to the head…and never mind as Reks beats him down all over again. Yoshi dodges a charge and Reks’ shoulder hits the post. That allows Tatsu to go up top for the spinwheel kick and the pin at 4:33.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match here but it was fine. This was very basic as they were keeping things simple, primarily due to there only being about 4 and a half minutes to work with. Tatsu’s new look hasn’t meant much of anything, but at least he’s not talking about an action figure anymore.

Post match Reks and Hawkins beat down Tatsu but the Usos make the save. I smell a 6 man.

AJ has a note in the back when Kaitlyn comes in. It’s from Horny and he says leaving is the best decision he ever made. Kaitlyn says it’s from Maxine. Kaitlyn, who looks a lot worse with light blonde hair, fights Maxine next.

Kaitlyn vs. Maxine

Both of them look good but Kaitlyn looks better with darker hair. She has great legs though. Maxine is in essence in a swimsuit. Here’s your Maxine fact: her aunt is a careless maiden from Guadalajara who is engaged to a one legged Elvis impersonator who does a great version of Blue Suede Shoes. The match is your usual basic stuff here that isn’t very good.

Maxine hooks something like a dragon sleeper but Kaitlyn falls into the ropes. The fans here do not care at all. All Maxine so far but I’d rather look at Kaitlyn in gold so I’m not paying attention to the match here. Kaitlyn takes over with her horrible looking offense. She hits a Bubba Bomb and then a full nelson with her legs to make Maxine tap (with her foot) out at 4:48.

Rating: D. It’s your usual bad Divas match and more proof that AJ was the best choice for the 3rd season winner. Kaitlyn looks great in tight gold shorts and other than that, she’s about as worthless as anyone else you’re going to find on the roster. Not much here overall and the girls just aren’t that good. Granted this is on NXT so it’s not like anyone is watching them.

Video on how insane Raw has been lately and how its been in chaos, even dating back to Punk winning the title at MITB. This eats up like five minutes.

Kidd turns down Bateman to be his partner. Maxine comes up to yell at him for not being here. She leaves and JTG comes up to agree to be his partner. Oh my.

Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. JTG/Derrick Bateman

Bateman vs. Watson gets us going and Watson shows off a bit. We go to the mat with a headlock as Regal explains exactly where the arm is supposed to be for it to hurt the most. Leave it to an old villain to know that. There’s a double tag and JTG gets his head kicked off. That was a nice touch because I don’t like JTG. O’Neil has black and pink on for breast cancer awareness. That’s always cool.

The good guys double team JTG for awhile and rule the ring as we take a break. Back with Bateman hammering away on Watson which doesn’t work all that well for him. They head to the floor and Bateman hits a missile dropkick off the apron which gets two back in the ring. Off to JTG again who hammers away a bit more. A spinning neckbreaker gets two. Watson tries to fight back and the fans react to it.

This match has somehow been going on for ten minutes. It’s one of those matches where nothing has been going on at all but it’s been happening if that makes sense. Titus finally gets the hot tag that we know has been coming for awhile now. Bateman breaks up the pin but misses a top rope cross body. Clash of the Titus ends this at 10:41.

Rating: D+. The match was pretty boring but the problem with it is that it summarizes the main problem that these guys are having anymore: there is no reason at all for these matches to take place. If we’re just waiting around for the end of the show and the matches don’t really count towards records or standings or anything, what’s the point? I mean, how many times can O’Neil pin Bateman before it stops meaning anything? I think that’s the question they’re trying to answer.

Overall Rating: C-. Not a horrible show but at the same time it reiterates the same issue I just went into: this show is chasing its own tail. We’re no closer to finding a winner of this competition than we were two months ago and the only thing that has really changed is that Young is gone and that’s not even because of the show but rather him being Wellnessed. Young will be able to return in about two and a half weeks and he’ll probably be brought back and we’ll be right back where we were two weeks ago. Such is the life of NXT I guess.

Results
Yoshi Tatsu b. Tyler Reks – Top Rope Spinwheel Kick
Kaitlyn b. Maxine – Full Nelson Leglock
Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson b. JTG/Derrick Bateman – Clash of the Titus to Bateman

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ECW on TNN
Date: March 24, 2000
Location: Ice House, Salem, New Hampshire
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

Things have changed a bit after the last PPV but it still isn’t anything worth seeing yet. Hopefully things can pick up a bit now that we have a new main story with Awesome and Raven teaming up as the new big bads. As long as I don’t have to sit through the hardcore nonsense even more, things should be ok. Let’s get to it.

Joey and Joel do the intros with Gertner ripping into Cyrus with nothing special.

Opening sequence.

Joey brings out TV Champion Super Crazy and we get the same video from last week on how he won the title at Living Dangerously. Crazy says something in Spanish and here’s his first opponent: Tajiri. Before the match can start here’s Cyrus to say he’s the boss so this is a Japanese death match, which I think means anything goes. Joel goes after Cyrus but is threatened with being arrested and fired. Cyrus shoves Joey as well so Styles takes off his jacket, only to be met with the same threats. If Joey hits him, the show is off the network and will go back to the stone age. Joey backs down and Cyrus gets to stand tall.

TV Title: Super Crazy vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

The match starts after a break with Crazy being whipped into the barricade. Back inside and Tajiri hits a hard kick to the head and the handspring elbow but Crazy dropkicks him back to the floor. An Asai Moonsault into the crowd takes Tajiri down again before getting two off a moonsault press back in the ring. Crazy pounds away with right hands in the corner but Tajiri comes back with a quick victory roll for two and a HARD kick to the head puts Crazy down.

That’s too much wrestling though so here’s a chair, only to have Crazy dropkick it back into Tajiri’s face. Tajiri comes back with a chair to the Crazy’s head and an even bigger one puts the champion down again as we take a quick break. Back with Tajiri tossing in a table as Crazy is busted wide open. A top rope double stomp puts Crazy through the table for two so Tajiri brings in another table. Crazy comes back with a powerslam through the table and slides in a third because why have two when you can have three. A moonsault doesn’t put Tajiri through the table so Crazy powerbombs him through it for the pin.

Rating: D+. How exactly was this different from any run of the mill ECW match? The Japanese death part of the match was just a bunch of table spots which you can see anytime around here, which is the problem with having a hardcore company: it takes away from the shock value of it when the match is supposed to be something special.

Post match Corino, Victory and Rhyno come in to destroy Crazy until Sandman makes a three minute entrance for the save. As is always the case, the heels just stand there while Sandman drinks in the crowd. Tajiri hits the mist on Sandman, allowing Rhyno to Gore him down. Sandman and Rhyno both get piledrivers.

Back from a break and the Network is still in the ring with Cyrus saying no one can stop them. If anyone wants to fight them, come out here right now and do it. This brings out Balls Mahoney with his chair and the goons bail on Cyrus for some reason. He realizes he’s on his own but Corino saves him from death. The segment FINALLY ends after taking up literally over half of the show.

Earlier today Da Baldies beat up Tommy Dreamer in front of a Coke machine. Apparently Raven has put a bounty on Dreamer’s head.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Vic Grimes

Dreamer jumps Grimes on the floor and sends him into the post to draw early blood. They head into the aisle where a spotlight staring straight into the camera blinds us for a bit. The brawl goes into the crowd and I don’t think there was ever a bell. They fight into a penalty box as you can barely see a thing in this mess. Back to ringside and Dreamer hits him in the back with a chair but Grimes hits a powerslam on the floor to take over.

Now they head to the back of the arena for more walking around with the occasional punching called brawling. Grimes gets on top of a scaffolding and drops an elbow onto Dreamer on the concrete. Da Baldies carry Dreamer back to ringside and crotch him on the barricade. Back inside and a top rope splash is only good for two because the people in ECW won’t get pinned if they get their heads cut off while wild horses attached to their limbs run off in all four directions.

Back to the floor with Dreamer sat in a chair so all of Da Baldies can pound on him. Grimes tries a running flip dive but lands on the apron before falling on the empty chair. Dreamer pulls out a ladder for no apparent reason before tying Angel (another Baldie) up in the Tree of Woe. Dreamer catapults the ladder into the Baldies’ faces and drops them with a double DDT. Grimes is dragged back into the crowd and placed on a table so Dreamer can drop an elbow of his own. Back in the ring and Grimes blocks a DDT but misses a Swanton onto the ladder, giving Dreamer the pin.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling of any sort at all. It was a bunch of messy spots with a few wrestling moves thrown in for fun. This is the kind of nonsense that just keeps going and going while eating up the limited television time they have. The Raven vs. Dreamer stuff was played out three years ago but it’s all the GENIUS Heyman can come up with.

The yet to be named Sinister Minister is in the ring and says that he came up with the idea to pair up Raven and Awesome. Oh yeah that’s a thing. I had forgotten they were a pairing until now. Francine is in the ring with him but he berates her for a bit before handing her the mic. She brags about all the success she’s had in ECW and doesn’t like him taking credit for her success. Francine claims she’s behind Awesome and Raven, so here are the Impact Players to stare down Awesome and Raven as the show ends.

Overall Rating: D. That’s on the ECW sliding scale. This was a tricky episode to grade because they did have stories going on, but the stories either aren’t interesting or are just being teased instead of actually going anywhere. The wrestling was bogged down by more hardcore nonsense, which is going to cost them in the long run. It’s fine to have once in awhile but when that’s all you have, the effect is gone in a hurry.

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Bound For Glory 2012
Date: October 14, 2012
Location: Grand Canyon University Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s the biggest show of the year for TNA and honestly I’m not all that excited about it. The main event tonight is Aries vs. Hardy for the title, but the REAL main event is Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray. The question is much more about who is going to be the leader of the gang, or if that’s even going to be revealed. I’d look for a fun quality show tonight but nothing that jumps off the page. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about what you would expect: it talks about the history of the company and how big the show is. Most of this has been shown on Impact in the Memories Are Waiting promos.

There’s a ramp to get to the ring which is always cool.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion

Ion is defending. Rob came out on Impact when Ion was running his mouth and Van Dam said Hogan said he could have any match he wanted at this show. Zema has been injuring a lot of people lately. Rob takes over to start and knocks Ion to the floor but Ion moves before Rob can dive. Back in and Ion takes out Rob’s leg followed by a corkscrew kick out of the corner for two.

The champ goes up again and gets crotched, followed by a kick to take him down again. Out of nowhere Ion hits a jumping tornado DDT for two and then two more. Rob goes up but gets shoved into the barricade like he’s had done to him a few dozen times over the years. Ion hits a flip dive to keep Van Dam down while also barely avoiding breaking a rib on the barricade.

Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Ion. As usual with Ion, his in ring stuff isn’t bad but the promos and persona getting there don’t do him much good. Off to an abdominal stretch which is pretty quickly broken. Van Dam makes a very fast comeback, takes Ion down, hits Rolling Thunder and the Five Star and wins the title at 8:00.

Rating: C. I can’t complain about Van Dam winning the title at all as this gives the title some credibility that it hasn’t had in a new champion in awhile. Also this gives the fans something to pop for early on which is the right idea. The match itself was nothing you wouldn’t see on Impact, but the right ending helps.

Magnuis says it’s his time to shine and therefore take the title.

TV Title: Samoa Joe vs. Magnus

They used to be partners and then split. Feeling out process to start with Joe taking him into the corner for the enziguri to take over. The champ pounds away and Magnus has to hide for mercy. Magnus comes back with punches of his own as we have a strike heavy match so far. A big old clothesline takes Joe down and Magnus takes over for the first time so far. Magnus takes him down with a knee and stomps away, followed by a jumping elbow for two. This is pretty decent stuff so far.

Joe fires back with some right hands but charges into something like a Michinoku Driver (sitout slam) for two. Magnus runs into an atomic drop and Joe starts speeding things up, firing up the fans in the process. They’re in Phoenix so you wouldn’t think that would be too hard. The backsplash and snap powerslam get two for Joe. Joe gets all crafty now and counters a leapfrog into a powerbomb to kill Magnus.

In a sequence that is always cool, Joe hooks an STF but once Magnus is getting too close to the ropes, he shifts it into Rings of Saturn. After Magnus gets a foot on the ropes, Joe loads up the MuscleBuster but Magnus goes to the eyes. A kick to the face takes Joe down and Magnus hits a top rope elbow for two and Joe is all fired up. He throws on the choke but Magnus escapes by climbing the corner. A jawbreaker escapes the hold again and Magnus goes for the knee. You don’t try holds on Joe though, and the choke retains the title for Joe at 8:57.

Rating: C+. They’re going with the fast matches tonight and that’s probably a good idea with these less interesting matches. This was a better match than the first one but when you have two talented guys in there instead of one, you’re often going to have a better match. There was no reason for Joe to lose the title yet anyway so no complaints there.

Roode says it ends tonight with Storm.

Video on Roode vs. Storm. Last year Roode lost in the main event of BFG, then Storm won the world title the next week on Impact. Roode used a beer bottle to beat Storm for the title and turn heel, which led to Storm wanting both revenge and the title back. Roode lucked out at Lockdown and then cost Storm the BFG Series, leading to a street fight tonight.

James Storm vs. Bobby Roode

MMA fighter King Mo is guest outside referee for no apparent reason. Storm takes over to start and hits a fast backdrop. We head to the floor with Storm in control. He hits Roode in the back with a chair but Roode sends him into the barricade to counter. Storm leg sweeps him into the barricade as well and Roode is in trouble early. Bobby comes back and sends Storm into the post, busting him open. Well at least they’re not waiting on bringing the violence here.

We get the weapons thrown into the ring and the fans want tables, because what would a street fight be without tables? Oh man Storm’s cut is a gusher. Roode puts a chair between the top and middle ropes, allowing James to come back with some kendo stick shots to the ribs. Storm hits a trashcan into Bobby’s balls using a kendo stick like a golf club to make Roode vibrate on the mat.

They head to the ramp with Storm hitting a DDT on the I guess wood. Storm jabs Roode in the ribs with a fan’s crutch and DESTROYS him with a trashcan. Mo hasn’t been a factor yet. Roode snaps off a spinebuster onto the ramp out of nowhere to give himself a breather. Storm grabs a fan’s beer for a quick refreshment. They head to the announce table and Roode kind of spears Storm through the other table to take over. There is blood EVERYWHERE. That gets two back in the ring and Roode yells at Hebner, which gets him in trouble with Mo.

The distraction lets Storm hit the Codebreaker and Last Call….for two. I’m glad that was only two as it would have been a pretty weak ending. Another superkick is caught and Storm is sent face first into the chair Roode set up in the corner a long time ago. That gets two so Roode puts Storm on the top rope. He gets a chair for a hard shot to the head and busts out the bag of thumbtacks. See, now that it’s been awhile since we’ve done this, it means something again. Roode tries a superplex onto the tacks but gets shoved down into them in a painful looking spot.

Storm drops a top rope elbow for two but Roode hits him low to stop Storm’s comeback. Roode goes to the floor and gets a beer bottle which is what started this whole thing. Storm hits Bobby low, takes a drink of the beer, and cracks the bottle over Roode’s head. Storm stands him up, and with Roode out on his feet, a second Last Call sends Roode into the tacks for the pin at 17:27. King Mo was barely a factor here and didn’t need to be around at all.

Rating: B+. In short, the cage match was better. That’s all this boils down to: the match at Lockdown was one of the best built up matches I can remember in a long time but they extended the feud because that’s what seemed like the right idea. Now don’t get me wrong: this was a great brawl and a good bloodbath and it had the perfect ending to the feud, but the feud didn’t need to be here, or at least not with Storm losing the second match. This is like Rock beating Austin at Wrestlemania 19 with nothing on the line. It’s a very good match, but it doesn’t mean as much.

Joey Ryan talks about says he should be on the roster already. He and Snow are polar opposites and tonight, they’re on the west coast where he has the advantage. He’s bringing sleazy back tonight.

We recap Ryan vs. Snow. Ryan was on Gut Check and got a big percentage of the votes, but the judges said no. Ryan terrorized Gut Check, becoming the only interesting thing about the segment for months, and tonight he faces Snow for a contract.

Al Snow vs. Joey Ryan

Ryan hides in the corner to start and the fans want Head. Snow is in workout clothes instead of wrestling gear. Snow gets down on all fours and lets Ryan get in a free chance to start. That goes about as well as you would expect for Ryan and he hides in the corner again. This is a good choice for putting on after the big street fight that just happened. It’s a way for the fans to calm down a bit.

Ryan keeps trying basic offense and Snow stops him at every turn. A delayed slam puts Joey down and Snow takes him to the mat with a headlock. Ryan gets in a shot to the ribs and a suplex for two. Snow comes back with the trapping headbutts and grabs Joey’s chest hair. Snow takes him down again for two and the fans want Head. And that’s what they get from under the ring. Ryan shoves the referee down and steals the Head for a makeout scene. Snow ties Joey up in the ring skirt….and here’s Matt Morgaon to Carbon Footprint Snow into next week. Ryan gets the easy pin at 8:28.

Rating: D+. This was about what you would expect from Al Snow in 2012. The Morgan twist was fine and a pairing between him and Ryan could be interesting, as if nothing else Ryan could use a bodyguard. This was the ending they had to go with and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially with faces being undefeated in the first hour.

Ryan and Morgan shake hands.

Kaz and Daniels don’t care about Twitter questions and brag about how awesome they are. These two feel totally greasy and evil and they’re GREAT at it.

We recap the tag title match. Basically both challenging teams should be able to maul the champions but they can’t quite get there. AJ and Angle keep arguing and Hernandez and Chavo don’t have the experience yet.

Tag Titles: Kazarian/Christopher Daniels vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle

Angle and AJ come out separately. Wes Brisco is in the front row and I’d bet we’ll see him later. Daniels and Kaz are in orange and black to start jokes from Taz. Chavo and AJ start things off and in a strange visual, Angle and Hernandez are standing on the same side of the apron. Daniels and Kaz are chilling on the floor. This starts with the usual technical goodness you would expect from these two.

Off to Angle who stomps Chavo down in the corner and Chavo has some tape on his shoulder. Angle slams Chavo down on said shoulder and Daniels blind tags Kurt to come in and….scratch that as Angle stays in. Off to AJ vs. Hernandez with the big guy throwing AJ around and getting two off a splash. Kaz tags himself in to stomp on AJ but there’s the drop down/kick and it’s back to Kurt.

Chavo comes in to face Kaz and some good basic wrestling takes Kazarian down. Hernandez drops Kaz with a backbreaker and it’s back to Chavo to dropkick the freshly tagged in Daniels. AJ comes back in because we can’t have a PPV without Daniels vs. AJ right? A clothesline puts AJ down and it’s time for some pelvic thrusting. The champs hit a double team move with Daniels hiptossing Kaz into AJ for two.

Kaz puts on a full nelson of all things on Styles but a quick Pele takes Kaz right back down. There’s the hot tag to Kurt who beats up everyone in sight. He snaps off some suplexes and counters a sunset flip into an ankle lock on Daniels. There go the straps but Angle misses a charge in the corner and hits the post. Angle shrugs that off and suplexes Kaz onto Daniels for two.

Kaz comes back in with the slingshot DDT on Angle but Hernandez comes back in and takes out Kaz. Daniels smacks AJ in the face and there’s no one in the ring. Daniels dives onto Angle from the apron and there’s the REAL big dive from Hernandez to take everyone out. Kaz tries a rana off the top to Hernandez off the apron but Hernandez goes the wrong way and Kaz basically crashes on his shoulder in a SICK looking landing.

AJ gets the attention off Kazarian by hitting a BIG dive on the champs and Hernandez. Kaz is at least sitting up now. Chavo suplexes Angle over the top and back in as he rolls some suplexes. Angle Slam out of nowhere puts Chavo down and a double suplex takes SuperMex down as well. Kaz is back in with a clothesline to take Daniels down and the BME gets a VERY close two on AJ.

Chavo sends Kaz to the floor and hits another big dive to take him out. Angel’s Wings are broken up by Styles and the moonsault into the reverse DDT takes Daniels down. Hernandez actually tags in and hits a slingshot shoulder block followed by the Border Toss. Chavo hits a Frog Splash to give Hernandez (the legal man) the pin on Daniels and the titles.

Rating: B. This was a good match from these six as you would expect, but it didn’t really get close to the other matches that the teams have had before. That has to be expected though and this was certainly entertaining. All the dives were great, but man alive someone is going to get hurt badly from one of them one day. Daniels and Kaz losing makes sense as they’ve done almost all they can with the belts at this point.

Chavo says that was for the fans and for Eddie.

We recap Tessmacher vs. Tara. Tara is the teacher, Tessmacher is the student, Tara snapped, you fill in the rest. Oh and Tara has some Hollywood boyfriend who is likely some reality TV schmuck.

Knockouts Title: Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

Tess is defending. Tessmacher’s robe/jacket is on the ropes as we start. A quick crucifix gets no count for the champ. Teryn Terrell is referee again because…because…I have no idea why she’s still around actually. Tara gets sent to the floor and we get a chase scene. Tara hides behind the referee and we head right back to the floor where Tess gets dropped on the apron to give Tara the advantage.

Back in and the champ gets one on a sunset flip and it’s off to a chinlock by Tara. Tara whips her into the corner but charges into a boot followed by a DDT from Tessmacher to put both girls down. Tessmacher takes Tara down and nips right back up, followed by a top rope rana (decent one too) but Tara blocks the Tesshocker. Widow’s Peak and Tara gets the completely clean pin at 6:18.

Rating: D. The rana looked good and the girls looked good in their outfits, but thank goodness Tara won here. Tessmacher is just worthless as champion and hasn’t changed a bit since she won the belt the first time. Tara has had the belt before but at least she’s better than Tess, but most people would be.

Tara introduces the boyfriend: Jesse Godderz from Big Brother. To the shock of no one, there is zero reaction. He’s been training in OVW for like a year and has won five tag titles there. Tara and Jesse make out in the ring. Crowd: “WHO ARE YOU?”

We get a video from the Hall of Fame ceremony last night. Lex Luger inducted him, which is way better than Christian. Hogan dressed up in a t-shirt while everyone else was in suits. Sting talked about owning a gym in California and having Hulk Hogan working out there.

Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Ray is No DQ.

We recap said tag match. Aces and 8’s is a motorcycle gang who has been terrorizing TNA for about four months now and tonight, there’s a match between Sting/Ray vs. two members of the team. If the masked men win, they get full access to the Impact Zone. If they lose, the whole group leaves forever. The whole mystery here is about who their leader is, but in theory we’re going to find out tonight. Anderson was going to be the partner of Sting but Aces and 8’s beat him up, resulting in Ray getting the spot instead.

Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray

Sting and Ray both have facepaint. Aces and 8’s have theme music now. They bring out Joseph Park who looks a bit near death. There are two members here, one in a plaid t-shirt and another in a black one. We’ll call plaid shirt #1 and black shirt #2. This is No DQ and a brawl starts on the floor. Sting fights #1 and Ray has some issues with #2. #2 seems to be the taller of the two.

Sting gets sent into the announce table as the fans chant for Bully. Sting and Ray double team #1 and the fans want tables. The Stinger Splash hits the barricade as it has all but one time that I can ever remember. #2 and Sting start in the ring with Sting in trouble. Off to #1 who hits a clothesline for two. Park is chained to the barricade at ringside. #2 hits another clothesline for another two on Sting.

A bit boot gets another two and Ray is starting to play cheerleader. Sting makes a fast comeback and tries the Scorpion but #1 breaks it up. A suplex is countered by Sting into the Death Drop but Sting doesn’t cover for some reason. Double tag brings in #2 and Ray with Ray cleaning house. A middle rope shoulder takes #2 down and the fans are way behind Ray. Ray double clotheslines them down and a splash gets two on #1.

#1 brings in a chair but Ray hits a big boot to stop the shot. A third Aces and 8’s guy, pretty clearly Wes Brisco, comes in and hits Ray low. Park gets spat on and breaks the chain off the barricade. He comes in and destroys the third guy before beating him up the ramp. The match breaks down and #2 gets caught in a Doomsday Device. Double splashes crush #2 in the corner again and it’s Table Time with Sting playing Bubba’s role. Ray gets the table but #1 pulls Sting to the floor. Another member of Aces and 8’s comes in and spinebusts Ray through the table to give #2 the pin at 10:51.

Rating: C. Not much of a match here but the point is that Aces and 8’s won. How this makes anything any different is beyond me but this story hasn’t made much sense in the entire time it’s been running. Hopefully we’ll get some more to this tonight because if this is it, then it’s going to feel flat. The match was pretty much fine.

The rest of the group comes in and beats down Sting/Ray until Hogan comes in for the save and marches through them all until only the guy that jumped Ray is left. Hogan cleans house and Sting is back up. They go for the mask….and it’s D-Von. Yes, D-VON. Fans: “This is awkward!”

Aries says Hardy needs to win this to complete his comeback. Tonight, Aries is coming in angry and that’s not good for Jeff.

We recap the world title match. Aries is jealous of Hardy, Hardy wants the title to complete his redemption.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries

The fans are pretty much split which isn’t what they were hoping for I don’t think. We start with a long feeling out process and we have roughly half an hour for this. They head to the mat and Hardy actually keeps up with the champ (Aries is defending if I didn’t mention that) until they head to the corner for the slingshot dropkick. Aries comes back and puts Hardy on the apron for a slingshot ax handle. He takes a victory lap and then one in reverse.

Back in and Hardy gets two off a suplex. They’re still in first gear here and that’s fine. Jeff knocks Aries to the floor and mocks Aries. The fans don’t seem pleased with Jeff so he jumps off the apron with an ax handle of his own. Jeff charges at Aries but Hardy crashes into the barricade and hits Aries at the same time. Back in and Aries gets two off a top rope splash. Aries charges into a boot in the corner and the crowd is probably 80% pro Aries.

A backbreaker gets two for the champ and it’s off to an abdominal stretch on the mat. Aries takes him down again and hits a corkscrew plancha for two. Hardy blocks the Last Chancery and hits something Big Show used to call the Alley Oop. He sets for a powerbomb but throws Aries backwards instead of forwards. Show’s was a bit slower but it’s the same move. Hardy makes his comeback and hits the low dropkick for two.

Whisper in the Wind gets two and the fans have quieted down a bit. Twist of Fate is countered and Aries is knocked to the floor. Hardy misses a slingshot and there’s the suicide dive to drive Jeff into the barricade. Another dive takes Hardy out again with this one getting two in the ring. Aries is busted but nowhere near what Storm was earlier. There’s the Last Chancery but Jeff escapes quickly.

They head to the ramp and Jeff can’t hit the Twist, but rather gets clotheslined into the ropes. Aries drops him on his head, sending the back of Jeff’s head into the edge of the ramp. And people wonder why he’s a drug addict. A missile dropkick sends Jeff into the corner but he comes out with the Twist for two. Jeff loads up the Swanton but gets crotched and super ranaed down from a double standing position. That looked awesome. Corner dropkick sets up the Brainbuster for two and Aries is STUNNED. Aries puts Jeff on top but gets knocked off and the Swanton gives Jeff the title at 23:04.

Rating: B+. This was a good main event but after the Aces and 8’s stuff, this came off a bit flat. Also, TNA REALLY needs to mix up their main event styles. The kicking out of finishers and then the pin soon thereafter can only take you so far and they’ve done it for years now. Watch a few TNA PPV main events and the formulas are almost always the same. Hardy winning is the right choice but it doesn’t feel like a huge moment at all for the most part. Still though, a quite good match.

Hardy celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Was this a great show? No. Was it their best show of the year? No. Was it good enough to be their biggest show of the year? Not really. What it was however was a quite enjoyable show, other than the big surprise which my jaw is still having issues closing over. The ending was the right call as Hardy had to win the title to send the fans home happy. There are a lot of ways they can go now, but unfortunately Impact is going to be ALL about D-Von and that pretty much freaking sucks.

I can’t get over that and if they thought the angle was going nowhere already, they’re in for a big surprise now. I don’t think he’s the leader, but man alive this is BOUND FOR GLORY, not Impact. It’s a good show overall though and it sets up a bunch of stuff for the future, but man alive I don’t know who went with D-Von as the surprise. Even as a regular member, which is what he likely is, who thought that was a good idea for BFG?

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Zema Ion – Frog Splash

Samoa Joe b. Magnus – Koquina Clutch

James Storm b. Bobby Roode – Last Call

Joey Ryan b. Al Snow – Pin after a Carbon Footprint from Matt Morgan

Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr. b. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle and Christopher Daniels/Kazarian – Hernandez pinned Daniels after a Frog Splash from Guerrero

Tara b. Miss Tessmacher – Widow’s Peak

Aces and 8’s b. Sting/Bully Ray – Ray was pinned after a spinebuster through a table

Jeff Hardy b. Austin Aries – Swanton Bomb

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Somehow there are only six matches for this thing so either each match is getting twenty minutes or some stuff is being added in.  Let’s get to it.We’ll start with the main event which was made No DQ via Twitter after Impact, because saying it’s No DQ ON THE FREAKING TV SHOW would have been a waste of time.  I’ll go with what should be obvious and have AJ get the title here, but I have a bad feeling we’ll see some screwjob that sees AJ lose when he’s supposed to win.  Yes it would be stupid, but that’s how TNA rolls anymore.

Jeff Hardy to win the X Title.  Hardy doesn’t lose at BFG.
Bobby Roode better beat Angle, or the lesson apparently is work hard to help the company and you get to lose to a guy who can’t stop drinking at work and gets arrested once a year or so.  This feud is going to continue though.

I’ll go with Hernandez and Chavo to win the title shot because these two are the charmed team in TNA for whatever ridiculous reason TNA has.  I have no idea what they see in the pairing because they bore everyone to death.  They’ll win the gauntlet but lose the title match.

Magnus over Sting with him turning heel because if there’s one thing TNA is lacking, it’s a 58th heel in the upper midcard.

Gail wins the Knockouts Title because she has to have it once every few months or the Knockouts Gods will destroy the earth.

Overall, Bound For Glory feels like a very flat show.  There’s nothing on here that sounds like a big match and the entire thing feels like a launching pad into the TNA vs. Dixie story.  I’m convinced Hogan appears at the end to screw over Dixie after she screws over AJ and get the title on Styles, because that’s what the promotion clearly needs: more HOGAN.  I’m not looking forward to this show and it feels like it’s the biggest show of the year because TNA calls it the biggest show of the year.  I was WAY more excited for Slammiversary with its lame main event.  The wrestling should be good but the build has been awful.

Thoughts/predictions?

Thunder
Date: May 28, 1998
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Lee Marshall, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

The main story coming into tonight is, say it with me: what side is Sting on? After Luger joined the Wolfpack on Monday, Sting was offered a spot but the show ended before we got his response. We’re heading into the Great American Bash and we only know a few matches so far. Whatever we’re getting though isn’t the most thrilling stuff in the world. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Nitro with Sting holding up the Wolfpack shirt but not putting it on.

Opening sequence.

The announcers talk about the Sting situation for the first of about 95 times tonight.

Here’s Bret Hart to open things up. He wants peace and quiet while he talks because the fans sound disappointed in him. That’s fine though as he’s disappointed in the fans as well. No one knows what it’s like to be in a tough situation better than he does. Every time he steps in the ring he gives everything he has and he’s the best there is, was and ever will be. However there’s one guy going through a tug of war with his conscience and that would be Sting.

Bret knows exactly what Sting is going through with everyone pulling him in various directions. The red and black don’t suit Sting at all but later tonight, Bret is going to offer Sting the keys to his wrestling future. He won’t need the people anymore and he’ll be more successful than ever before.

Jim Powers vs. Barbarian

Barbarian grabs a headlock to start but Powers comes back with some weak kicks to the ribs. Choking puts Jim down again, Powers makes a comeback, Jimmy Hart interferes, big boot gets the pin for Barbarian. This would have been boring even as a dark match.

Here’s Chris Jericho in a Rey Mysterio shirt for an interview. Chris feels bad because he and JJ got in an argument on Monday but that will never EVER happen again. He’d be perfectly happy if JJ just brought him his Cruiserweight Title right now, but JJ isn’t here tonight. Jericho makes Tony hold up the Conspiracy Victim sign and swears that this isn’t over. On Monday, Jericho is going to Washington D.C. and find the best legal sources he can find to prove that he should be Cruiserweight Champion.

The announcers talk about Sting some more and show us a video of Giant calling out Nash, resulting in Luger joining the Wolfpack. We also get the ending of the show again.

High Voltage vs. Jim Neidhart/British Bulldog

The non-WWF refugees jump start the match but get sent into each other and out to the floor. We start with Neidhart vs. Kaos and Jim cranks on the arm for a bit. Kaos takes him down by the head and it’s off to Rage for a slingshot legdrop for two. Rage misses an elbow and it’s off to the Bulldog with the fans not caring at all. The delayed vertical suplex gets two and everything breaks down. Bulldog powerslams Kaos for a fast pin. Another worthless match.

Here’s the Wolfpack, debuting their signature rap song. There’s no Hennig or Rude with them which is probably the best option. Savage says Luger is the man. Luger says there are times in life where you have to go with your gut instinct and that’s why he’s here right now. The Wolfpack is the place to go if you want to win titles and it felt right to make the jump. He still respects WCW and didn’t turn his back on them. Sometimes in life you’re either a player or you’re not, so he’s a player in the Wolfpack right now.

This brings Luger to Sting. They’ve known each other for years and while they haven’t always seen eye to eye, there will always be friends. Luger felt something on Nitro and Sting told Luger he felt it too. Sting needs to take the same step that Luger took and don’t listen to someone like Bret Hart who knows nothing about him. Luger does the too sweet line and we’re out. This explanation took less than five minutes and made perfect sense. Why couldn’t we get something like this from Bret?

Glacier vs. Van Hammer

Are they just trying to torture me this week? Feeling out process to start with Glacier casually kicking Hammer down. Hammer comes back with a cobra clutch slam and does the Crane Kick pose from Karate Kid. Back up and Hammer shoulders Glacier down for two and the ice man rolls to the floor. They head back inside with Glacier kicking away in the corner, only to be punched in the side of the head for his efforts. A big kick to the face puts Hammer down and Glacier puts on the Rings of Saturn but he lets go early, allowing Saturn to run in and beat on Glacier for the pin.

Rating: D. The fact that this is the match of the night so far should tell you everything you need to know about this show. Glacier isn’t interesting as a character and it’s a downgrade for Saturn to have to feud with him. This match was as bland as the rest of them have been tonight but this was longer, which could be a benefit or a detriment depending on how you enjoy torture.

Post match Raven and Saturn lay out Hammer and Glacier. Raven gets on his knees and begs Saturn to be his partner again but they think they see Mortis, only to beat up a popcorn vendor instead. Mortis sneaks up behind them dressed as I think a construction worker to blast Raven with a cookie sheet and leave. Saturn carries Raven to the back.

Chris Benoit vs. Booker T

This is match #2 in the best of seven series for the TV Title shot at the Bash. Benoit won the first match on Monday with the Crossface and I’m sure this is going to be the best match of the night. Booker grabs a headlock to start but Benoit takes him down with a drop toehold. A powerslam puts Chris down and an elbow drop gets two. Off to an armbar on Benoit for a few seconds before they trade standing switches and a spinning kick drops Benoit to the floor.

Back in and Benoit gets two each off a snap suplex and a clothesline. A hard whip into the corner puts Booker down for two more and we hit the chinlock. Benoit shifts into a double arm crank before hitting a hard chop to put Booker down again. Booker comes back with a clothesline to put both guys down as we take a breather. It’s Benoit up first with a backbreaker to set up the Swan Dive for a very close two.

Back to the chinlock on Booker but he fights up with a flapjack to get a rest. Benoit avoids the side kick and crotches himself on the top rope and a German suplex is good for two. A big mudhole is stomped in Booker but he comes back with a suplex of his own. Benoit ducks the side kick but the second attempt connects, setting up the missile dropkick to tie the series.

Rating: C+. This was more of a back and forth match than what they did on Sunday but the action was still very solid. These matches are very helpful for WCW as they give the show some meat instead of the quick and dull matches that dominate the shows most of the time. Good match here.

Benoit praises Booker but questions his heart. We’ll find out what Booker is made of but he’ll find out why Benoit is the Crippler.

TV Title: Brad Armstrong vs. Fit Finlay

Feeling out process to start until Finlay grabs a headlock. That goes nowhere so they run the ropes a bit and Armstrong gets two off a hiptoss. Finlay comes back with a shot to the side of the head and a slam. A clothesline puts Armstrong down as the announcers talk about which NWO Sting will join. The idea of him staying with WCW isn’t even considered. We hit the chinlock and the boring chants begin. Finlay drives some elbows into the chest but Armstrong comes back with a belly to back suplex for two. Not that it matters as Finlay tombstones him down to retain.

Rating: D-. END THIS SHOW ALREADY! I can’t take many more of these matches. There has been one decent match in an hour and a half of this show. The best part so far was a Lex Luger promo which lasted about two minutes. Those are your highlights so far. Is there no one else Finlay can fight for that belt?

This week in WCW Motorsports. Next.

The announcers talk about the Savage/Piper segment from Nitro and of course we see the whole thing.

Barry Darsow vs. Saturn

They hit the mat to start with Saturn grabbing a headlock. Darsow misses a right hand and gets suplexed down before Saturn fires off kicks in the corner. Darsow gets two off a clothesline before sending Saturn’s shoulder into the post. A spinwheel kick puts Barry down but he comes back with a quick shoulder breaker. His Barely Legal arm hold can’t get locked on so Saturn superkicks him down and ends Barry with the Death Valley Driver.

Rating: D+. Oddly enough Darsow’s psychology worked here. It’s really basic stuff (he has an arm hold finisher so wok on the arm) but that’s often enough to carry a short match like this. Nothing special to see here but somehow this is in the upper half of the matches on this show. Let that sink in for a minute.

To cap off this horribly boring show, we have technical issues and get a graphic of the arena. Well of some arena, as when the feed comes back we see a wide shot of a very different building.

US Title: Barry Horowitz vs. Goldberg

Seriously, this is the main event. Match lasts 45 seconds and you can fill in the blanks yourself.

Here’s Bret for the big recruitment speech to Sting despite Bret not even being an official NWO member as far as I know. Giant and Bischoff come out with him so at least there’s some kind of association. Bret says he’s the only man that can trust Sting and he was there to prove it at Starrcade. If he had anything to do with it, Sting would still be world champion. He lists off some similarities before calling Nash and Savage old and washed up. Sting can’t trust those guys but here’s the Wolfpack to disagree. Bret calls them all scum and the brawl is on to end the show. No Sting.

Overall Rating: F+. This is the worst kind of show you can have. It wasn’t really terrible, but it was SO boring. What happened on this show? We got a bunch of low level acts in squashes, no development in any storyline (unless you really stretch and call Booker tying up the series significant) and no Sting. Oh wow the NWO factions are fighting again. Such an interesting story. Absolutely retched show tonight and it really makes it clear how WWF was taking over.

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Smackdown
Date: October 18, 2013
Location: Spring Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re practically at a standstill here with the Cell PPV a little over a week away. Orton is still feuding with Bryan, Big Show is still a vigilante and no one cares about the Bellas as the new saviors of the Divas. However Goldust and Cody Rhodes are the new tag team champions after a great match on Monday night. We need to get to the PPV already to get us on to anything new. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main event from Raw with Big Show costing Shield the titles.

Theme song.

After the theme song we open with Brad Maddox and Vickie Guerrero in the ring. Vickie screeches about running a tight ship here on Smackdown and guarantees that Big Show will not be causing havoc here tonight. There will be order and discipline and Brad is here to assist her in achieving those goals. Brad says he’ll be keeping Big Show out of here tonight and Vickie praises the regime for their guidance. Cue Daniel Bryan who says he’s glad these two are doing what’s best for business.

What’s best for business though is Bryan beating Randy Orton inside the Cell with guest referee Shawn Michaels. As for tonight however, there’s a rumor that a 7’0 monster has gotten through security and here he is. Actually it’s just Big Show’s music and there is no giant. Bryan says he’s just messing with the two of them, drawing a laugh from the crowd. Big Show isn’t here yet but Cody Rhodes and Goldust are. Vickie yells about wanting discipline and makes Bryan/Cody/Goldust vs. Shield for tonight before cackling a lot.

Wyatt Family vs. The Miz/Kofi Kingston

Miz jumps Rowan to start and hits a quick corner clothesline to knock him into the corner. Off to Kofi to attack the arm before Harper comes in and sends Kingston into the corner. A quick cross body gets two on Luke but he dives into a big boot for two. Back to Rowan for a slam before Harper comes in for a chinlock. Kofi avoids a charge in the corner and goes to tag Miz, only to have Erick pull him off the apron. Harper sneaks in and takes Kofi’s head off with the discus lariat for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: D+. No time to go anywhere here but it furthers the Miz vs. Wyatt feud. With Bray on the shelf we’re going to have to build it up on promos but luckily that’s where Bray shines more than anything else. Kofi was his usual jobbing self here but he never loses any popularity. It’s also good to see the Wyatts get a win to make up for their loss last week.

Post match the Wyatts circle Kofi but Bray calls them off. It’s ok that Miz is afraid because Bray is the hammer that everyone fears. Miz should enjoy his world as long as he can because the Wyatts are going to take it all away.

Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee

Brie has a banged up shoulder. AJ immediately bails to the floor a few times but Tamina blocks Brie from going after her. Tamina finally moves and Brie gets in a right hand before sending it back inside. AJ absorbs everything Brie throws at her and snaps the bad arm over the top rope to take over. Off to an armbar as Brie screams a lot. Brie’s arm is wrapped around the middle rope and it’s already back to another armbar. The twin comes back with an elbow in the corner and a middle rope missile dropkick for two. Nikki throws Tamina into the steps, allowing Brie to grab a TERRIBLE looking Bella Buster for the pin at 3:55.

Rating: D. If this is supposed to make me sympathize with or care about the Bellas, it’s not quite working. I have a hard time caring about two beautiful women on a reality show who happen to be sleeping with two of the three top guys in the company. The whole feud started because AJ said she was a wrestler and Brie is a reality TV personality but we’re supposed to like the reality TV star on the wrestling show. Yet WWE is surprised it’s not working.

Lillian is introducing a match when Big Show comes through the crowd. He gets in the ring and holds up a ticket given to him by Daniel Bryan. Big Show thanks the fans for all the support he’s given to him through social media and it seems the fans want Big Show to get his job back. He holds up his fist but here are the GM’s (Hanzel and Gretel according to Show) to try to throw him out. Brad says Show has nothing to lose which Show says is the worst thing you can say. There’s the KO punch and Show leaves through the crowd.

CM Punk vs. Big E. Langston

Langston easily breaks Punk’s grip and pounds him down before running Punk over with a shoulder block. A big knee lift puts Punk down again but CM fights up and slugs away at Langston before low bridging him out to the floor. Punk’s slingshot plancha is caught in midair and Punk is rammed back first into the post as we go to a break. Back with Langston caught in a half crab but powering out, only to have his hurricanrana caught in another half crab.

Langston lets him go but a Warrior splash only hits knees. Punk comes back with the leg lariat to the face but the swinging neckbreaker is countered. Langston misses a charge into the post and falls out to the floor, setting up a nice suicide dive from Punk. Back in and a high cross body gets a close two. The fans are liking this. The top rope elbow gets another two count but Langston escapes the GTS and runs Punk over. Warrior Splash gets two but Punk slips out of the Big Ending and it’s high kick/GTS for the pin at 7:38 shown of 11:08.

Rating: B-. Fun match here with Punk playing a good David to Langston’s Goliath. I’m a fan of Big E. and it’s annoying to see him fall through the cracks like he has in the last few months. He’s more than capable of talking and his look is enough to keep him around for years. Good match here.

Post match here are Heyman and company to congratulate Punk on his win over a marginally talented rookie. However Punk has to face a professional inside the Cell and he wants no part of that man. Punk says that makes Heyman an idiot rather than the best in the world. There are two words that Heyman needs to focus on.

The first is Cell, as in what they’re going to be locked inside of. The second word is Hell, which is what Heyman and Ryback are going to go through. Heyman quotes AC/DC and threatens to come explain what he means personally. The Heyman guys head to the ring to beat down Punk but Langston makes the save. Looks like a face turn which could be intriguing.

After a break Del Rio is in the ring waving a Mexican flag. Josh introduces us to the Cena video from Raw. Alberto says that he was waving that flag because he’s the champion of Mexico. Unlike himself, the people here have no passion or soul at all. John Cena is the ultimate gringo representing these people and Del Rio can’t stand him.

Who does Cena think he is by coming back and being handed a world title shot? Cena has only been gone two months but his ego keeps growing day by day. After he loses to Del Rio, he’ll be just like all these people: a nobody. Josh gets put in the armbreaker as an example of what’s happening at the PPV.

We recap Big Show knocking out Maddox. Brad sold the heck out of that punch.

Real Americans vs. Usos

Colter is on commentary. Cesaro gets elbowed down by Jimmy to start as Colter rants about Los Matadores. Off to Swagger to run over Jimmy in the corner and Colter is blaming the government shutdown for the arrival of Los Matadores. Cesaro does a remarkable 27 rotation giant swing to Jimmy to one of the biggest reactions of the night.

Back to Swagger for some stomping and a double chickenwing. Colter wants to know what kind of people kidnap a little person and make them dress like a bull. Maybe they owe child support and have been passing bad checks. Cue Los Matadores so Torito can gore Colter a few times. Jey comes back with a NASTY looking superkick to set up the Superfly Splash on Swagger for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: D. This was a squash with a screwy ending. It’s very annoying to see Cesaro get more and more over because of a great display of physical strength, only to be used to put over a worthless tag team like Los Matadores. The Usos need to get the tag titles eventually and there’s a chance they can take them from the Rhodes Brothers, perhaps in a three way match.

Swagger gets beaten up post match.

Raw ReBound shows Shawn and Orton’s showdown.

Shield vs. Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Goldust

Orton comes out after Bryan and says that Bryan can’t beat him and that he’s in way over his head. Goldust and Reigns get things going with the power man taking Goldie into the corner and the fast Shield tags start. Rollins stomps Goldust down and it’s quickly back to Roman who gets caught in a Russian legsweep. A kick to the side of Roman’s head is good for two and it’s off to Cody for a springboard missile dropkick.

Rhodes gets caught in the wrong corner as well with Roman sending him into the post as we go to a break. Back with Ambrose raking Cody’s eyes on the top rope before it’s back to Rollins for a modified chinlock. Reigns comes back in for a splash and a chinlock of his own before elbowing Cody down for two. Back to Rollins for some kicks to the back before Roman comes in again for a standing chinlock. There’s a distinct lack of Ambrose int his match so far.

Cody sidesteps a charging Roman and sends him out to the floor. Back in and a dropkick puts Roman down again but Rollins dropkicks Goldust off the apron. Seth gets kneed in the face for his troubles and it’s a double tag off to Ambrose vs. Bryan. Daniel responds to the YES chants and hits all his favorites including the moonsault out of the corner, the corner dropkick and the kick to the head. Everything breaks down and a Disaster Kick drops Rollins.

Ambrose and Bryan hit double clotheslines but Reigns’ spear hits the steps instead of Goldust. A running knee to Dean’s ribs puts him down but Bryan can’t launch the headbutt. Dean gets two off a butterfly superplex as Cody makes a save. Cody loads up a sunset flip from the apron but Rollins counters into a powerbomb throw onto Goldust onto the announce table. Back in and Bryan almost gets the YES Lock but has to go after Rollins. The FLYING GOAT takes out Seth and Dean and the running knee is enough to pin Ambrose at 9:48 shown of 13:18.

Rating: B. This took time to get going but the last five minutes or so were such complete insanity that it’s hard not to love. They kind of booked themselves into a corner here though as you can’t have the tag champions lose four days after getting the belts and you can’t have Bryan lose this close to a world title match so Shield had to go down. Still though, fun stuff.

Overall Rating: B-. This is what Smackdown needs to be: focused more on action than the storytelling. The main event as well as Punk vs. Langston were good matches and the rest of the matches other than the Divas weren’t terrible. I liked this so much better than Raw as we didn’t waste time on recapping everything and actually did stuff. Nice show tonight.

Results

Wyatt Family b. Kofi Kingston/The Miz – Discus lariat to Kingston

Brie Bella b. AJ Lee – Bella Buster

CM Punk b. Big E. Langston – GTS

Usos b. Real Americans – Superfly Splash to Swagger

Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Shield – Running knee to Ambrose

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