Monday Night Raw
Date: July 2, 2012
Location: Laredo Energy Arena, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re in the second half of the year now with Raw again. We have four MITB contestants so far and there’s a rumor of a fifth showing up. I believe it’ll be a former champion but it’s hard to say given how this company keeps its stipulations straight. Lesnar is supposed to be here tonight too so we’ll get more of him vs. HHH. This is one of those shows that is going to be used to build towards the PPV. Let’s get to it.

After more technical difficulties, here’s Cena to open things up. He talks about how last week was his crash course in MITB because you never know when someone is going to come and break things up. He’ll win the case and the title and all the stuff you would expect him to say. Cue Bryan chanting YES. Cena: “See? Even Bryan agrees with me.” Bryan says he’ll win the title at MITB so Cena won’t be the next champion.

Cue Punk who says he disagrees with Bryan’s claim that he’ll win. He asks people if they disagree with Bryan, getting a lot of YES chants. For some reason only Cena has had theme music so far. Punk says that Bryan’s ex-girlfriend will be counting the shoulders down, and then it’s Punk vs. Cena all over again. Cue Jericho (with music) who says he’s tired of people stealing his catchphrases. Bryan cuts him off and is told to shut up as only Jericho can say it.

Jericho welcomes us to Raw Is Jericho and says that after tonight no one will evvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvver be the same again. He says he’ll win MITB and dares anyone to come out and say otherwise, and of course he’s Kane. Kane says otherwise in something that made me chuckle. Cue Big Show and it’s a big brawl. Kane beats on Jericho and Cena goes after Big Show while Bryan and Punk are both going to the floor. Kane goes after Big Show but Show knocks everyone down.

David Otunga/Cody Rhodes/Prime Time Players vs. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth/Christian/Santino Marella

Christiana nd Young start things off and a middle rope missile dropkick gets two for the Canadian. Off to Truth for his first action in months after a broken foot. Young tries a right hand but gets gyrated at instead. Off to Kofi who hits a middle rope shoulder for two. Boom Drop is broken up by Titus who pulls Darren to the floor. Kofi dives onto Titus but gets clotheslined down by Young as everything breaks down.

We take a break and come back with Cody holding Kofi in a surfboard. AW is mic’d up now for some reason. Titus comes in and slams Kofi for two. Kofi gets in a shot and it’s off to Santino vs. Otunga. Santino hits that quick suplex and a Stunner for two. Everything breaks down again and the Prime Time Players walk off. Santino hits his usual and Cody walks out on Otunga. Cue Brodus Clay of all people as Santino loads up the Cobra. Otunga keeps trying to run but gets thrown into the Cobra for the pin at 6:24. Too short to rate given what we saw but this was organized chaos at its best.

Otunga takes a bunch of finishers post match and we get a big dance party.

Teddy (in charge tonight) is dancing in the back when Alberto and Ricardo come in. Alberto earned his one on one title match and he wants it by Jorge. The Board has said that Alberto gets his title match at MITB but tonight, Alberto has a surprise opponent.

Stephanie talks about her dad getting ready for the 99 Rumble. It was basically a Rocky parody mixed with a way to show off that Vince was in great shape.

Alberto Del Rio vs. ???

Cole talks about how the car was driven here from Alberto’s home near Mexico City. That makes me wonder: how does he get these cars everywhere? Does he have a big fleet of people driving/transporting them all over the country? If so….that’s kind of awesome. The fans GO OFF on Alberto with some Spanish swearing. Here’s the opponent.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara

Think Cara is popular in south Texas? Cole calls Mexican wrestlers lucha libres. Mike Tenay he is not. Del Rio jumps Cara as he comes into the ring and goes insane on him. The bell hasn’t rung yet. Del Rio destroys Cara on the floor and puts him in the armbreaker so Cara taps. There was no match.

Bryan is in the back and steals a flower from a random bouquet. He comes up to AJ and apologizes, even though AJ has Punk X’s on his hands. She says that’s sweet and of course has nothing to do with the title match at the PPV. Tonight she’s going to win and run into the arms of her soul mate. She destroys the flower and leaves.

Heyman is live via satellite instead of Lesnar being here.

There’s a 20 man battle royal tomorrow on Smackdown. The winner is next week’s GM of Smackdown. Ok then.

After a recap of the Heyman/HHH challenge to Lesnar, we’re told by Heyman that Brock will deliver his answer to HHH in person at the 1000th Raw. Lesnar wants to face HHH at Summerslam but not for the reasons people thing. HHH will do it because he needs money for the lawsuit. Also, it’s his exit strategy for his career, because after this HHH will never be able to wrestle again. After Summerslam, he can be the executive that everyone says went down in a blaze of glory.

Kane vs. Big Show later on in a No DQ match. Heaven help me.

Vickie Guerrero/Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus/AJ

This looks odd on paper but when you think about it all of the connections are there. The guys start us off after Sheamus puts AJ on the apron. Dolph dropkicks him down but gets launched into the air soon thereafter. A running ax handle gets two for the champ but Dolph takes him down into a chinlock. Sheamus breaks that up and hits White Noise. He loads up the Brogue Kick but Dolph tags Vickie before it can hit. Sheamus kicks his head off to send him to the floor and AJ comes in. Shining Wizard kills Vickie at 3:27.

Rating: C-. This was VERY short but DANG that Shining Wizard was awesome. AJ continues to be insane but it looks like we’re heading up to the payoff at MITB which is the right play. This was barely long enough to grade and I’m not sure what the point was in basically destroying Ziggler like that. Still though, that Shining Wizard was awesome.

AJ does the YES chant and heads to the back. She finds Punk who is on the phone with his sister. He missed the match and AJ is crushed.

We get a video of Slater’s destruction at the hands of old people, leading to this.

Heath Slater vs. Doink The Clown

This is basically a squash with Slater hitting his spinning sleeper mat slam (didn’t that have a name?) for the pin at 1:20.

Post match, here’s DDP to a BIG reaction and a Diamond Cutter.

Video on John Cena and Alicia Fox visiting sick/injured troops.

Kane vs. Big Show

This is No DQ. Show controls to start and sends Kane to the floor. He pulls Kane up from the floor BY HIS HEAD, onlyt o knocks Kane back to the floor again. Show misses a charge into the barricade but he throws Kane into the steps to take over. They fight over a chokeslam onto the announce table but Show superkicks him down instead. Show brings a chair in but walks into a DDT for two. The top rope clothesline misses but Kane grabs the chair. Show spears him down and chokeslams Kane onto the chair for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: D+. This was probably the best possible idea for them: keep things short. This wasn’t horrible but I’m not sure what the point of the stipulation was. It came out of nowhere, but to be fair it probably made the match as watchable as it was. These two have never had good chemistry together so keeping it short was probably their best option.

Teddy runs into Eve in the back and she sucks up to him. Teddy gives her a nametag in a funny bit. She rips it up and runs into AJ, telling her to leave the mind games to the big girls and telling AJ to go sit in the corner and cry. AJ wants to know who Eve is going to brown nose next. Eve will do anything to get attention, so AJ says she’ll show everyone how to do just that.

DX invading WCW was a big deal as well. This one actually was.

Tyson Kidd vs. Tensai

Tensai takes him into the corner and fires off the headbutts but misses a charge. Kidd rolls him up……AND GETS THE PIN AT 20 SECONDS???? WOW.

Tensai beats up Sakamoto post match.

Jericho and Bryan debate jackets and a catchphrase duel breaks out. YES vs. EVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVER is hilarious.

Punk tells Cena to follow his lead out there.

Tensai destroys Kidd in the locker room.

Chris Jericho/Daniel Bryan vs. CM Punk/John Cena

Punk and Bryan start things off. They speed things up of course and Punk takes control. He sends Bryan into the corner and it’s a double tag. Cena dominates Jericho as he is known to do, knocking him off the apron as we take a break. Back with Jericho getting two on Cena and taunting him for not being able to tag Punk. The Lionsault misses but Bryan breaks up the tag again.

The corner dropkick gets two for Bryan and it’s off to Jericho again. The dueling chants begin but Jericho blocks the fisherman’s suplex. The AA is countered into a DDT but Cena fires Jericho into the corner to put both guys down. There’s the diving tag to Punk, who comes in with a springboard clothesline to take over on the fresh Bryan. Powerslam gets two and Bryan gets put in the Vice. Jericho FINALLY makes a save but Cena fights him up the aisle and into the back.

Punk and Bryan are the legal guys left, as well as the only two still in the ring. Bryan moonsaults out of the corner but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. Bryan starts firing off the kicks and a big one to the head gets two. Bryan goes up but gets superplexed down for another two. And here’s AJ to skip around the ring. No one looks at her so she gets on the apron as Bryan fires off kicks to Punk.

No one looks at her still so she gets down as the guys hit cross bodies at the same time. AJ goes under the ring and pulls out….a table? She sets it up at ringside and very slowly climbs the steps. AJ goes up top but Bryan gets in front of the table. Punk gets up on the ropes to stop her as well, so she kisses him. Then she shoves him through Bryan through the table and starts a YES chant. The match ends at we’ll say 17:30.

Rating: B. The match was great and while the ending was confusing, it’s certainly intriguing. This certainly keeps things interesting as she still hasn’t picked anyone. She’s the most interesting character in the company right now by far, because in short you don’t know what she (AJ for you idiots out there) is going to do next. Good ending to a good match.

Overall Rating: C. The first hour was similar to having a blind monk with Parkinson’s Disease brand me with an iron while Chinese torture masters ripped out my fingernails. The second hour was better, to the point where I was really getting into things before the show ended. Kidd pulling off that upset was the perfect move as it gives him even more momentum going into the PPV. In short, very good second hour, pretty bad first hour.

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Impact
Date: July 1, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
Episode Title: The Voices in My Head

We get a recap of Hogan vs. Abyss which is mainly about THEY are coming.

We open in the arena with Abyss going crazy and throwing chairs into the ring. Hogan comes out and we’re told he needs back surgery. Bicshoff comes out before anything happens and Hogan tells him to step aside. TWO security guards come in to stop things. BISCHOFF SLAPS ABYSS.

Hogan pops him with a chair which does nothing and Hardy comes out for the save. A Twist of Fate puts Abyss down but a Hogan chair shot doesn’t? He adds a Swanton for the heck of it.

AJ vs. Joe later. That should work. Abyss comes up to the announce table and points at Taz, doing the YOU thing. It’s really going to be the ECW thing isn’t it?

Abyss vs. Hardy tonight.

InkIncvs. MotorCityMachineGuns

First match for the #1 contenders in….4 weeks? Shelley and Shannon to start which makes me think this is a Divas match for a second. This is a decently fast paced match which tells me we’re going to be done with Ink Inc soon. D-Von comes down to keep an eye on this and does commentary, saying he’s making sure Bubba doesn’t screw this up.

Neal hits Shelley with a spear for two and here’s Bubba just like the obvious would suggest. Neal gets distracted, setting up a SWEET double team move as Shelley hits Sliced Bread #2 while Sabin hits a sitout powerbomb on Neal for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was decent enough and the ending was AWESOME but seriously, the Neal/Bubba thing needs to die. It just does. No one is interested in either Dudley as a singles guy so don’t try to make them interesting. Just do Ink Inc vs. 3D like you should. We’ve tried the Dudleys as singles guys twice and it’s bombed both times. Don’t waste time on it a third time.

Pope is back tonight.

Bischoff makes Abyss vs. Hardy for the main event.

Dixie is just getting here. WHY IS IT SO HARD TO GET TO A TV SHOW ON TIME?

AJStylesvs. SamoaJoe

Ok, these two are usually AWESOME. Let’s see if they can manage to mess this up. Flair and Kaz come out behind AJ. That chant Joe gets every time has to be intimidating. Joe allegedly has the home field advantage….in the house that AJ built. Got it. AJ slams Joe and looks for approval from Flair. Eh that’s fine I guess. There is no one in Fourtune yet.

This is a decent back and forth match but I wish they could have it be more like their old ones without AJ constantly looking for approval. AJ goes for the figure four and gets caught in the clutch for the tap out. Post match AJ gets yelled at AGAIN by Flair. Kaz gets all smirky and I wonder what the point in making AJ into this is. AJ gets a mic and calls out Kaz for a match next week and it’s on.

Rating: B-. For only six minutes, this was solid. It’s obviously light years away from their epic wars, but this was far from bad. The post match thing showed promise for AJ which is a huge thing. Joe still looks completely directionless which is normal for him anymore but this was fine for what it was.

Dixie is with Hogan and Bischoff and in one of the funniest segments ever, Hogan calls Sting cancer, says Sting can’t handle success and says that Sting wants to destroy everything that’s successful and always has. I almost had to pause the show to clear the tears from my eyes from laughing so hard. Oh and Nash had a cameo.

BrianKendrickvs. DesmondWolfe

This is a submission match and Williams is on commentary. Wolfe dominates early so you know that Wolfe is jobbing here again. Williams vs. Jeremy Buck next week in a ladder match. Uh….WHY? He’s having an Ultimate X match at the PPV so shouldn’t he be doing that instead? Chelsea walks off and Kendrick gets the cobra clutch on Wolfe for the eventual tap. Yep that was predictable and pay no attention to the hold looking HORRIBLE.

Rating: N/A. This was maybe two minutes long and therefore the shortest submission match I can ever think of other than against a jobber. Ah never mind as this would fall into such a category. Again, is there a point to having Wolfe job so much? I’m certainly not seeing it.

Tommy Dreamer won’t comment on attending Impact.

Pope gets a video package.

And here he is. The fans chant hallelujah. He starts crying and says he’s glad to be back and thanks everyone. He says he wants Anderson and he’ll get back to him later. He wants the title back and talks for awhile. And cue Angle. He gets far more cheers and takes the entire segment which is expected I guess. Pope is the future of TNA apparently. The match is made for Victory Road, which makes me wonder who isn’t allowed to make matches.

We recap Flair vs. Lethal and continue to see how irritating Flair is now.

JayLethalvs. MattMorgan

Lethal calls out Flair and AJ but gets his opponent instead. Morgan has been asked to join Fourtune apparently. Morgan jumps him and goes for the elbows in the corner, most of which miss but whatever. After Morgan kind of dominates, Hernandez comes out and causes the distraction so that a missile dropkick can end Morgan.

Rating: C-. This was too short to mean anything but it was just about setting up the angle at the end with Hernandez. It’s kind of a head scratcher but for a few minutes long, this was fine for what it did. Lethal got to yell at Flair and Hernandez cost Morgan a match so that all adds up.

Abyss makes a 2×4 with nails in it.

MadisonRaynevs. TaylorWilde

WOW the champions is actually wrestling! I don’t believe it. This is of course not very good. It’s nice to see some fresh blood in there though so I’ll give them that. We lay around a lot as the ECW guys, this time plus Rhyno, show up to completely take away the spotlight from the match at hand as everyone cheers for ECW.

In a funny line Taz points out that none of these guys liked him in ECW anyway. Rayne hits that knee to the back of the head on Wilde to win it. Love comes out and beats her up with a chair.

Rating: N/A. This was bad but what do you expect really? The crowd only cared about the ECW guys and the match was awful. Love more or less has to win at the PPV but where does the division go from there? I have no clue at all but I doubt they do either.

Sarita beats the crap out of Wilde for no apparent reason other than a heel turn. She looks good in black too.

We run down the Victory Road card to waste some time.

Dixie finds Sting and he asks if she gets it now. She blames Sting for everything and she suspends him for 30 days without pay. Sting says she’s been conned but won’t explain. Dixie isn’t listening apparently. He’s about to explain and here’s Bischoff with security to get rid of Sting. He says let’s just make it indefinite instead of 30 days.

Abyssvs. JeffHardy

Van Dam is referee here. We get rid of the 2×4 board almost immediately. The ECW guys are gone too. Abyss takes over and that lasts only a bit as Abyss loses focus. This is fairly back and forth and is getting some time. Jeff “hits” a “Twist of Fate” but doesn’t get the Swanton.

And then the Swanton does hit and gets the completely clean pin. Oh sure…why not. Anderson comes in for the save with a chair but accidentally hits Hardy and takes Shock Treatment to end the show with Abyss standing tall.

Rating: C-. Eh nothing great here but nothing horrible either. The booking makes next to no sense here but it’s TNA so what do you expect? Abyss standing tall to end the show would be a lot better if he hadn’t gotten pinned in about seven minutes more or less clean but whatever. This did its job….I think.

Overall Rating: C. This was a different kind of show but it had one thing going very well for it: there was a point to just about everything here. The angles were almost all advanced or at least addressed which is good. The wrestling mostly sucked, but the main thing here was that they had a coherent story.

There was some unintentional comedy which you have to expect here, mainly in the form of the Hogan/Bischoff/Dixie segment which was just great. The rest of the show was solid and Sting STILL not explaining is like a running joke now. This was a good show I guess, but they really need to upgrade the wrestling.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 3, 2003
Location: MCI Center, Washington D.C.
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re three weeks away from No Way Out and most of the card is pretty clear on the Raw side. The main event will be determined tonight as we have Jericho vs. Steiner for a shot at HHH’s title. Yeah I don’t know who’s going to win either. Other than that we have the official start of something pretty famous tonight which we’ll get to soon enough. Let’s get to it.

Also on a personal note, this was my 15^th birthday.

We open with Bischoff on the phone with Chief Morely and talking about signing Austin back to Raw. This is in Spanish due to WWE screwing things up. Morely can’t hear him at the arena. Bischoff is in San Antonio, Texas to find Austin.

Theme song.

We’re in English so King and JR can intro the show.

Here are Stacy Keibler and Test to open things up with Stacy returning after being hit in the face by a Jericho chair shot two weeks ago. Stacy says she’s trying to put the incident behind her because she needed to be more careful. However, she does want Jericho to apologize so Test calls Chris out to do so. Jericho comes out and says he has more important things to worry about, like going to Wrestlemania as the world champion.

He’s gotten over hitting Stacy in the face and suggests that Test be a big boy and get over it. Test says Jericho has five seconds to apologize and gets ready to go after him, but Christian jumps Test from behind, knocking Stacy down in the process. Test gets up and beats Christian down….and is booed for hugging Stacy. Yeah he’s a jerk but he did the exactly right thing here. Why boo him?

Kane goes into Chief Morely’s office and finds….RVD? Apparently Morely asked both of them to be here and Van Dam plans on asking for a rematch with Batista/HHH. First though, he wants to know why Kane bailed last week. It was because the mask was taken off but that’s not good enough for Rob. “What are you, Spider-Man?” They’re about to brawl when Morely arrives and makes a one on one match between the two of them later tonight.

Test sends Stacy back to the hotel and promises that this isn’t over yet.

Dudley Boyz vs. 3 Minute Warning

Chief Morely (in charge tonight if that wasn’t clear) assigns Rico as guest referee tonight. It’s a big brawl to start with the Samoans taking over but the 400lb Rosey misses a split legged moonsault. Jamal gets caught in a Doomsday Device but Rico counts very slowly. The Dudleys load up a 3D on Rosey but Jamal rolls up Bubba for a fast counted pin.

Spike Dudley comes out and sets up a table, allowing Bubba to powerbomb Rico through the wood.

Bischoff is lost in San Antonio. That’s better than being Lost in Cleveland.

Tommy Dreamer vs. ???

No opponent as HHH, Batista, Orton and Flair hit the ring instead of presumably Hennigan or Cappotelli. HHH has a bad leg due to the Steiner attack last week so Orton and Batista take Dreamer down with ease. After a horrible beating to Dreamer, HHH says this is the greatest evolution of talent you’ll ever see. Flair is the greatest of all time, HHH is the greatest today, and Orton and Batista will be the greatest one day. HHH says that he’s everything Ric Flair is (more like Harley Race) and every woman wants to be with him. On top of that you take his mind and you have the best in the world.

HHH says he’s the only diamond in this business but you have to look to the future. That brings him to Batista who is a monster of unbridled destruction. Then you have Randy Orton who has the business in his blood. HHH says Orton will be a diamond one day which is a nice metaphor. He also drops the name Evolution about five times as the official new name of the team, starting a path of destruction for the next year and a half.

Scott Steiner looks at some footage of the then unnamed Evolution attacking Steiner and then being beaten down again last week. As for tonight, he’s taking care of business with his biceps.

Evolution is in a sky box.

Bischoff goes to Austin’s house but is told Austin is at a bar by a man named Buford.

Clip from last week of Jazz returning and destroying Trish.

Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Non-title. There’s a large clock in the corner counting down to Bischoff’s time to fix Raw being up. Molly takes it to the mat for a quick one count before cranking on the arm a bit. Molly spins out of a snapmare before armdragging Victoria down a few times. A spinning side slam gets two on Molly before Victoria spins her down to the mat by the hair. Victoria gets two off a suplex before avoiding the handspring elbow in the corner. Widow’s Peak is enough to pin Molly in a quick match.

Post match Jazz comes out and hits the Jazz Stinger on Molly. Jazz shoves Victoria down as well before laying out Molly with a DDT.

Booker is fired up for his tag title shot but Goldust wants a deal first. If they win, great but if not then they split up.

Evolution has champagne.

Raw Tag Titles: William Regal/Lance Storm vs. Booker T/Goldust

Storm and Goldie start things off with Goldust cranking on the arm. A quick uppercut drops Storm and it’s off to the very popular Booker T for some chops to the chest. Lance comes back with a leg trip before it’s off to Regal who is taken down by Booker. Back to Goldust as the match is still slow paced. Regal comes back in and charges into an armdrag from Goldust.

Regal does some cheating via a knee to the back (he is a villain after all) and the champions take over. Willy comes in for a chinlock before it’s back to Storm for a cravate. Back up and a Boss Man Slam puts Storm down but Regal pulls Booker off the apron to block the hot tag. Everything breaks down and a powerslam gets two on Storm. The challengers are sent into each other and a quick dropkick from Storm is good for the pin on Goldie.

Rating: C-. This was tag team 101 but not a very good example of it. Booker and Goldust were a solid act for a long time and I don’t get the point of splitting them up when the division is such a wasteland at this point. Storm and Regal were solid in the ring but they weren’t the most charismatic team in the world.

Booker says they have nothing to be ashamed of and it’s not Goldust’s fault. He’s enjoyed their time together and they hug it out.

Bischoff goes to the saloon and tries to order a martini. This goes about as well as you would expect and Austin is in another bar elsewhere.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

Kane punches him during the finger point which is an idea more people should have used over the years. Van Dam comes back with some kicks and we have a standoff. Rob tries a monkey flip but gets caught in a powerslam for two. Kane can’t gorilla press him and Van Dam goes after the leg like almost everyone else does. Kane is kicked to the floor and taken down by a dive from Rob to fire up the crowd.

Van Dam is sent into the post and a side slam gets two back inside. A kick to the chest sets up Rolling Thunder for two but a big boot puts Rob down. The top rope clothesline connects and Van Dam is down with a hurt neck. He’s channeling his inner Bret Hart by goldbricking though….but here’s Jeff Hardy for the DQ. Huh?

Rating: D+. The match was ok but the amusing part was hearing King and JR talk about Kane being such a bad partner. You could swap the name RVD for Daniel Bryan and this commentary could be used ten years later. This wasn’t much to see but with just over four minutes to work with and a run-in ending what else could they do?

Jeff takes a chokeslam and the Five Star for good measure.

Booker is trying to find Goldust but he’s gone to his hotel.

Post break and Jeff is still down in the ring. Cue Shawn Michaels who was going to talk to Chris Jericho but this will have to do. Jeff is mad at the world right now and Shawn has been there before. Shawn sees wasted potential for Jeff and now it’s time for a decision. Shawn talks about throwing Marty through the glass 15 years ago (more like eleven or so at this point), and even though no one liked the decision at the time, it made him who he is today. Jeff gets annoyed so Shawn superkicks him. There’s something great about just kicking a guy in the face when he gets on your nerves. Shawn shines his shoe afterwards.

Sean O’Haire talks about democracy. This devil’s advocate character still makes me salivate, but we got Rikishi vs. Roddy Piper out of it so it’s all good right?

Maven vs. D’Lo Brown

They trade hiptoss attempts until Maven armdrags him down. We hit the mat with Maven holding a headlock as the fans are bored already. Brown comes back with a kneelift and sends Maven into the buckle as the booing continues. Maven hits what looked to be a spin kick and a backslide for two and a middle rope bulldog gets the same. Maven misses a missile dropkick and the Sky High powerbomb is good for the pin.

Rating: D-. This match exists. Next.

D’Lo’s manager Theodore Long teaches us about black power post match.

Bischoff arrives at the other bar (thankfully there were already cameras waiting for him) and after the break still doesn’t find Austin. Some guy makes fun of Bischoff and has beer poured on his head.

Evolution comes up to Goldust in the back and throws him into an electrical grid which shoots sparks everywhere. Great, it’s this angle.

Goldust is taken away by EMTs during the break.

Scott Steiner vs. Chris Jericho

The winner gets the world title shot at No Way Out. Steiner shoves him down to start but Jericho rolls him up and poses. Scott takes over and pounds away in the corner before hitting a gorilla press drop. There’s the elbow drop into the push-ups but Jericho grabs the referee to block a belly to belly suplex. A knee to the back sends Steiner to the floor so Jericho can send him into the steps. Steiner: “OW!” They head back inside for a surfboard submission from the Canadian.

Back in and Steiner hits something resembling a belly to belly suplex followed by a backdrop to take over. There’s the belly to belly but Jericho counters a powerbomb into a failed Walls attempt. Now the powerbomb hits for two but Steiner charges into a boot in the corner for two by Chris. Jericho hooks the Walls but Steiner quickly makes the rope for the break. Chris snaps Scott’s neck across the top rope but gets crotched on the top rope, setting up an Angle Slam off the top to send Steiner to the PPV.

Rating: D. Jericho was trying but Steiner was just horrible out there. Thankfully they kept this at about seven minutes instead of having it run 20:00 like the Rumble disaster became. Also did anyone believe Jericho had a chance here? Anyone? I didn’t think so, but then again we have to try to have disbelief right?

Vince comes in to see Morely and laughs about Bischoff running out of time. If Vince isn’t impressed next week, he’s fired.

Overall Rating: D-. Evolution got its name, Bischoff couldn’t find Austin, and we got the match that we knew we were going to get two weeks ago. Someone tell me what the fourth thing of note on this show was. This was two hours of nothing and a good sign of the problems this show would have for the rest of the year. The wrestling was bad, the promos were bad, the fans were baited and switched again on the Austin deal. Another horrible show this week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @Kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 1, 2013
Location: Gateway Arena, Sioux City, Iowa
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re getting closer to Money in the Bank and we have the participants in the ladder matches already set. Other than that the world title scenes are ready with Ziggler challenging Del Rio and Cena defending against Henry. The card is looking good for the PPV and the TV leading up to it has been solid. Hopefully that keeps up tonight so let’s get to it.

Vickie opens us up, saying that we’ve got Cena vs. Del Rio later tonight. She sucks up to the McMahons a bit just to be safe.

Theme song.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to open things up but the crowd seems pretty stoic for him. There’s a ladder and the red briefcase over the ring. Bryan says last week the answer was clear: NO he is not the weak link. The new question is can Daniel Bryan ride the wave of momentum and win the MITB match at the PPV? The answer is of course YES. He wants to follow in the footsteps of Sammartino, Hogan, Austin and The Rock. Bryan says he won MITB two years ago and he’ll do it again this year.

This brings out Sheamus to remind Bryan that he lost the world title at Wrestlemania in just 18 seconds. Sheamus says it’s been too long since he’s had a title around his waist so he’ll win one after getting the briefcase. Bryan wants to know if Sheamus will kick himself in the face if Bryan calls 1-800-Fella. This brings out Orton (no music) to say he’s starving for a title so he’ll be taking the WWE Title.

This brings out Kane who says he’ll do anything to be WWE Champion, including going after one of his friends. Bryan makes fun of Kane for not being able to beat Orton but Kane seems to blame Daniel for the loss. Bryan and Kane get in their usual argument but Christian comes out to break it up. He says he’s had more experience than anyone in ladder matches and he wants one more match. Christian isn’t the biggest, strongest, scariest or hairiest guy in this match, but he’s the best.

Cue CM Punk to almost no reaction whatsoever. He said he wasn’t going to do what everyone else was doing but then he heard the word best. Punk respects Christian but says he’s going to win his third MITB ladder match in two weeks. He doesn’t care if no one likes him because everyone in this match is a jerk. RVD must be watching somewhere and Punk can beat him too. Bryan yells at Punk but Orton gets in Bryan’s face, only to be cut off by Kane. Daniel gets on Kane for fighting his battles, allowing Orton to RKO Kane.

Tonight we’re going to look back at some great champions in wrestling history, starting with Buddy Rogers, the original WWWF Champion. We also look at Lou Thesz as the former World Heavyweight Champion. For those of you unfamiliar, the current World Heavyweight Title has nothing to do with the titles Thesz held as its history starts in 2002.

The Wyatt Family is still coming.

Shield vs. Christian/Usos

This is a rematch from Friday where Shield lost their second ever six man tag. Rollins starts with Jimmy before it’s off to Jey for two off a back elbow. Rollins comes back with some forearms to the back and brings in Ambrose. Jey takes him into the corner for a tag off to Christian who sends Dean to the floor. The Usos dive on the tag champions and Christian takes out the US Champion as we take a break.

Back with Jey in trouble in the corner as we get a clip from the WWE App. Rollins steps on Jey before it’s back to Dean for a quick suplex. Reigns powers Jey down for two before it’s back to Ambrose for some mocking of Captain Charisma. Jey comes back with a superkick to knock Dean down but Rollins breaks up the hot tag. A clothesline puts Seth down and now it’s off to Christian who cleans house.

A middle rope dropkick gets two on Rollins but an Ambrose distraction lets Seth hit a quick enziguri. Dean comes in but walks into the reverse DDT for two. Everything breaks down until it’s only Christian vs. Ambrose. The Killswitch is broken up but Rollins breaks up the sunset flip out of the corner, giving Dean a rollup pin at 9:36.

Rating: C. This was the only logical way to end the match as you need to give Shield their momentum back before the PPV title defenses. They’re pretty much past the six man tag phase of their run now so the loss didn’t hurt them all that much. This was fine stuff here but it was nothing special.

Kane is mad at Bryan but Daniel makes up for it by getting Kane a rematch with Orton. Bryan will be guest referee.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Jinder Mahal

Ziggler easily takes him down to start but misses a dropkick, allowing Mahal to get a running knee to the head for two. Ziggler avoids a charge in the corner as the fans chant for JBL. A dropkick gets two for Dolph as the fans chant for Jerry. The Zig Zag is good for the pin at 2:23.

Post match the Band goes after Ziggler but he takes them down with ease.

More great champion clips: Bruno Sammartino and Harley Race.

Vickie is complaining about things in the back when HHH comes in. HHH praises her for doing what the fans want but she’s stressed because the other McMahons are telling her what to do. The solution? Listen to them and then ignore it.

We get a career retrospective on Mark Henry.

Randy Orton vs. Kane

Bryan is guest referee. This is also a rematch from Smackdownw here Bryan threw Kane into the RKO to give Orton the win. Orton pounds away in the corner to start but walks into an uppercut to put him down. Kane fires off some knees in the corner and the low dropkick gets two. Off to a nerve hold by the masked man but Orton fights up and takes Kane down with the Thesz Press. A knee drop gets two for Randy but Kane comes back with a quick suplex. After a quick break on the floor, Kane misses a charge into the corner and Orton pounds away again. Bryan pulls Orton off but Randy shoves him away for the DQ at 4:47.

Actually scratch that as Kane demands and receives a restart. Orton hits a dropkick to knock him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Kane holding Orton in a neck crank before hitting some clotheslines in the corners. A side slam sets up the top rope clothesline but Orton dropkicks Kane out of the air. The snap powerslam puts Kane down but he breaks up the Elevated DDT. The chokeslam is countered into the backbreaker from Orton and THAT sets up the DDT. Orton loads up the RKO but Bryan breaks it up, allowing Kane to hit a big boot for the pin via a fast count at 12:20 total.

Rating: D+. This didn’t do much for me at all and it was a far cry from their match on Friday. The Bryan stuff is story development but when the blowoff match is going to be in a seven man match it’s kind of hard to care about it here. Kane getting a win here is fine as it doesn’t make Orton look bad and gives him some momentum heading into the PPV.

Kane grabs Bryan by the throat but lets him go and leaves. Bryan eats an RKO.

Punk says he’s beating the Primetime Players alone tonight. He trusts Heyman but not Axel. Heyman says Punk trusts him so trust his judgment.

Bob Backlund and Dusty Rhodes were great champions.

Fandango vs. Sheamus

Fandango dances aaround a lot to start so Sheamus does a little jig of his own. A quick clothesline puts Fandango down and Sheamus takes it to the floor with ease. Fandango is whipped into the steps but comes back with an enziguri in the ring for two. Off to a chinlock on Sheamus before he sends Fandango into the corner for some shoulder blocks. The ten forearms send Fandango to the aisle and he walks out for the countout at 6:16.

Rating: D. Well this sucked. The crowd is sucking the life out of this show and it’s very difficult to get into things at all. Fandango needed a win here to make himself look good after being gone for about a month but instead he loses while looking like any other given heel. Nothing to see here, as has been the case with a lot of stuff tonight.

Ryback vs. The Miz

Jericho is on commentary. Ryback pounds Miz down to start as Jericho talks about how Ryback is a whining complainer. The fans think this is boring as Ryback drops knees on Miz’s back. Some left hands have no effect on Ryback but even more have a bit of impact. Miz goes after Ryback’s bad leg and hits a big boot to take Ryback down. The corner clothesline hits and there’s a jawbreaker to the bad leg. Miz looks for the Figure Four but Ryback gets the ropes, so instead Miz pounds on the knee in the corner…..and Ryback says stop the match at 5:14.

Rating: D. Are the writers REALLY this stupid? I mean, do they want us to be interested in Ryback or do they just tear characters down like this for their own amusement? A year ago Ryback was a rising star and now he’s just this. This is the same Ryback who had a war with Cena a few weeks ago and now he can’t even survive five minutes against THE MIZ?

Post match Jericho hits a Codebreaker on Ryback.

Hogan and Flair were great champions as well.

Here’s Mark Henry with something to say. He didn’t get the name the World’s Strongest Man out of a Crackerjack box but rather he earned it. Henry was in the Olympics in 1992 and 1996 before entering the WWE 17 years ago. Since then he’s found out that there’s jealous, politics and accidental injuries in the WWE. In all those years, he’s never been given a legitimate shot at the WWE Championship. After all those years of pretending he liked the boys and doing the right things for the business he’s no further than where he started.

He deserves to be WWE Champion after all the time he’s given to this organization and all the fans. Henry has earned the right to be WWE Champion because the people hang on every word he says like a bunch of puppets. No one is going to keep him down at Money in the Bank and he’s going to do the right thing for himself. After he beats Cena, everyone is going to say he earned the title because he’s going to beat Cena up.

Vince comes in to see Vickie and Brad because he’s not happy with Daniel Bryan being out there. He does however like the main event of champion vs. champion. The other family members like it but Vince doesn’t like the money being thrown away. A match like that should be on PPV. It’s not good business, and the two of them need to remember there’s a long list of people who were fired for not listening to Vince.

Curtis Axel/CM Punk vs. Prime Time Players

Axel starts with Young as Heyman is already bragging. An armdrag puts Young down but Curtis won’t tag Punk. Off to Titus but Axel still won’t tag. The first decent chant of the night is for CM Punk but Axel silences them cold with a dropkick to take Titus down. The fans still want Punk but Curtis just looks at him and gets clotheslined down by O’Neil.

Titus suplexes Young onto Axel for two before putting Axel in an abdominal stretch. Axel finally gets up a boot in the corner and the double tag brings in Punk to face Young. The springboard cross body puts Darren down and the running knee in the corner sets up the Macho Elbow. There’s the GTS to Young but Axel tags himself in and steals the pin at 6:13.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t bad but it was storytelling instead of a match. We’re slowly building to Punk turning his back on Heyman once and for all to set up the showdown with Lesnar at Summerslam and putting Axel over at the same time is a fine way of going about accomplishing that goal. Not terrible here but it was all about the story instead of the wrestling.

Punk walks out on Axel and Heyman post match.

Austin and Sting are great champions.

Alicia Fox vs. Kaitlyn

Both girls get quick rollups for two before Fox pounds on Kaitlyn for a bit. Kaitlyn fights up and spears Alicia down for the pin at 1:52. Nothing to see here.

Post match AJ comes out and has some pictures exposing what kind of trash Kaitlyn used to be. The shot is of a 400lb woman with Kaitlyn’s face superimposed on her body.

Stephanie yells at Vickie but Vickie snaps a bit and says she’s being overloaded. Stephanie sympathizes until Vickie says HHH and Vince are a bit crazy. Next week Vickie gets a job evaluation in the ring.

Cody Rhodes vs. Antonio Cesaro

Before the match Colter talks about how sad it is that the government and Surprise Court is giving the country away. He brings Swagger back and says that we need to pick a side in the company revolution. Cesaro takes over with a quick gutwrench suplex but Cody comes back with a string of rollups. Rhodes is sent to the floor and JBL gets in a good line with “Cesaro knows five languages and now that he’s with Colter he’s learning Dutch.” Cody tries a backslide but gets countered into the Neutralizer for the pin at 2:20.

HHH and Booker T were great champions.

Eva Marie and JoJo, the new Divas for the reality show, are mocked by the Bellas. The Funkadactyls and Natalya come up to protest as this commercial continues.

The Wyatt Family arrives next week.

Alberto Del Rio vs. John Cena

Ricardo is missing due to an injury suffered going through a table on Smackdown. They trade headlocks to start until Del Rio shoots Cena off for a standoff. Del Rio escapes an AA attempt and takes a breather on the floor, only to walk into a snap suplex for two. Cena bulldogs Del Rio down but misses a charge into the post. Del Rio misses a charge at Cena and falls to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Alberto holding a chinlock before going up top, only to dive into a dropkick from Cena. The shoulder block misses though and Cena falls out to the floor again. Back in again and Cena initiates his finishing sequence, only to have the AA countered into a German suplex for two. Del Rio’s low superkick is countered into a belly to belly for two but he comes back with the enziguri to knock Cena off the top. Del Rio puts him in the Tree of Woe but misses a charge of his own, going shoulder first into the post.

Cena gets two off a top rope cross body as the fans are FINALLY into this show, over three hours after it started. The AA is countered into the armbreaker which is countered into the STF but here’s Henry to distract Cena. He circles the ring, allowing Del Rio to roll up Cena for two. The low superkick gets two for Alberto but here’s Ziggler on the top rope, allowing Cena to hit the AA for the pin at 15:56.

Rating: C+. This was good but you knew the double distractions were coming from the moment we went to a break. At the end of the day, these matches just don’t mean a thing no matter how clever the writers think they are. Also, Del Rio isn’t going to be a good opponent for Cena due to one simple reason: Cena isn’t going to tap out, so the armbreaker is worthless.

Post match Henry picks up the WWE Title and gets in the ring before throwing the belt down. Cena goes to pick it up but has to back away from Henry. Mark walks away to end the show.

One more Wyatt Faimly promo for the road.

Overall Rating: D+. This show was the opposite of the awesome that was the last two weeks of Raw. This was a bunch of far too long and far too repetitive segments with the McMahons and Vickie, setting up a segment that most people don’t care about in the slightest. On top of that we had the worst crowd I can remember in years dragging things down even further. Finally we had the focus on the title tonight which is fine, but these champion vs. champion matches don’t mean a thing given how often we see them anymore.

Results

Shield b. Usos/Christian – Rollup to Christian

Dolph Ziggler b. Jinder Mahal – Zig Zag

Kane b. Randy Orton – Big Boot

Sheamus b. Fandango via countout

The Miz b. Ryback via surrender

CM Punk/Curtis Axel b. Prime Time Players – GTS to Young

Kaitlyn b. Alicia Fox – Spear

Antonio Cesaro b. Cody Rhodes – Neutralizer

John Cena b. Alberto Del Rio – Attitude Adjustment

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

Tonight on Raw we’re hearing about great champions of the past who have held the World Heavyweight Championship.  The title that Alberto Del Rio holds has NOTHING to do with the WCW or NWA World Titles other than having the same design.  The history and lineage of the belts aren’t connected and the WHC started in 2002.  Totally different titles.

I got to thinking about the amount of title reigns in various companies today and did some checking.Ring of Honor has been around for over 11 years now and Jay Briscoe is the 18th world champion.  There has been one two time champion (Austin Aries) in the history of the title.  Here’s the interesting part: the WWF Title had its first two time champion after ten years, it’s second two time champion after 26 years, and it’s first three time champion after 28 years.

Think about that for a minute when you hear Cole talking about Orton and Cena and HHH having like 40 world title reigns between them.  They’ve done that in less than 15 years combined.  The 40th WWF Title reign took 35 years to reach in 1998.  See why old fans get annoyed at how fast the title changes hands in modern times?

Monday Nitro #94
Date: June 30, 1997
Location: MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko

This is probably a bigger show than the PPV from earlier in the month, or at least it’s being treated as such. There are two major debuts tonight and apparently Hogan is going to be here too. Other than that, the card is pretty much stacked with a lot of big names in action. This arena would host a bunch of PPVs so it has a big show feeling to it. Let’s get to it.

Tony does a quick intro and it’s off to Gene who brings out Naitch. Before Flair can talk we hear Piper’s music but instead it’s two women carrying a Piper mannequin. Flair starts to talk but the girls drop the mannequin. Apparently this is all that’s left of Piper after the girls had him all night long. One girl isn’t sure why Piper is called Hot Rod, because he isn’t hot. Oh these are Flair chicks for sure.

Flair says Piper crossed the line last week when Piper tried to tell Flair how to wrestle. That’s what he said? Thanks for clearing it up. Gene asks the girls if Flair is really the sixty minute man. Girl: “More like 30 seconds.” Flair immediately picks up the kilt and pretends he didn’t hear that line. He holds a funeral for Piper and the girls take Gene’s clothes off. He says his mother in law is watching so Flair struts a bit. This heel turn by Flair was way out there and it didn’t work on most levels.

The announcers tell us about Jericho winning the Cruiserweight Title two nights ago and then it’s right back to talking about Flair, who faces Piper at the PPV.

Cruiserweight Title: Juventud Guerrera vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending his newly won title. That’s probably the biggest win WCW has had over the NWO to date. They trade wristlocks to start but no one can get control. Jericho hooks a bow and arrow hold on the mat followed by a headlock. Juvy tries a moonsault but misses Jericho, who hits a belly to back suplex for two. A regular suplex gets two as well and Guerrera is put in the Tree of Woe followed by a baseball slide.

Jericho walks into an elbow but Juvy misses a springboard dropkick to put him right back down. Jericho misses a charge and hits the floor, where Juvy hits a HUGE dive to take him out. A release German suplex by Jericho sets up a double powerbomb but it only gets two. Instead it’s the super Frankensteiner by Jericho into the Liontamer for the submission win to retain the title.

Rating: C. This was basically a squash with Juvy being a jobber out there. Jericho winning the title was a big shock but to their credit it felt like a big deal. Guerrera was good at what he did and would become one of the best in the division for years to come. I was kind of surprised by how one sided this was but it wasn’t bad at all.

Post match Gene comes in to talk to Jericho and Chris puts the title on Gene’s shoulder. There’s an image for you. Jericho says this is a WCW belt and it’s back where it belongs. Syxx comes out and says the NWO still recognizes him as champion. He says Jericho can have another match for the title right now, and a brawl breaks out. Post break security pulls them apart and Alex Wright is in the aisle. He’s tired of not getting interviews and not getting title shots. Wright says he has a better body than Luger and that’s it.

Dean Malenko vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie jumps Dean as he’s coming through the entrance and rams him into the steps. They head into the ring as we hear about Los Gringos Locos, Eddie’s team with Art Barr in Mexico. Dean is in trouble as the bell rings and Eddie suplexes him down. A back elbow puts Dean down but the slingshot hilo misses and Eddie is sent to the apron. Guerrero goes up and gets crotched followed by having his tornado DDT countered.

Eddie gets launched face first into the buckle and a backbreaker gets two for Dean. A WICKED powerbomb puts Eddie down but Dean wants to beat on him more instead of pin him. Here’s Chavo to ringside and then to the apron as Malenko is loading up the Cloverleaf. Eddie shoves Dean into Chavo, followed by the brainbuster and Frog Splash for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was more about storytelling than the match, but the match wasn’t half bad. These two have been going after each other for weeks and it’s a good idea to have the first match end with some questionable means. It continues the story and was good at the same time. What more could you possibly want?

Mysterio is with Gene and says that he’s tired of being pushed around by Nash and the Wolfpac. It started when he was launched like a dart into a trailer and then powerbombed during his match with Syxx. Rey wants a match with Nash and the big man comes out to laugh and accept the challenge.

Here are Bischoff and Hogan with something to say. Eric is on a motorcycle because he enjoys being on them. Hogan talks about beating down all of their enemies and partying with Rodman (not here) later tonight. The party is the highlight of the interview. Pretty much Hogan had nothing to say here.

TV Title: Hector Garza vs. Steven Regal

Regal is defending, in case someone actually needs clarification. Regal, now in a singlet, tries to take Garza down with a Boston Crab to start. When that doesn’t work, Regal pounds away in the corner to take over. Garza comes back with a forearm but Regal takes him back down and struts a bit.

They head to the floor for a second which goes nowhere so Garza low bridges him back to the floor. Garza loads up the Corkscrew Plancha and we go wide to get a better look at it. This is a bad idea as Garza COMPLETELY misses Regal, barely grazing the champ’s shins. Back in and a moonsault hits Regal’s knees and the Regal Stretch retains the title.

Rating: C-. This was a fine enough way to kill off six minutes I guess but there’s nothing to it beyond that. Garza was about as much of a one move guy as you could possibly have and when that one move looked bad in a match, there wasn’t much else he could do. One thing you did get almost every week was a random pairing like this. There’s nothing wrong with that because you can throw something out there and see what works. If it doesn’t, you lose six minutes and that’s it. WWE seems to be trying this with Cesaro lately and it’s a good idea.

The Steiners want their match with the Outsiders accepted tonight. Didn’t they already win the #1 contendership? Why would they need a match to be accepted? This brings out the NWO en masse. Hall says he has a contract right now and the Steiners sign it without reading it. The contract says that the Steiners have to beat Chono and Muta before they get their shot. I’m sure THAT will be the last match before the title match right?

Super Calo vs. Psychosis

Calo knocks him to the floor and Psychosis stalls a bit. Sonny Onoo, Psychosis’ manager, distracts Calo and Psychosis takes over. Back in and Calo powerslams him down but gets enziguried to the floor. Psychosis goes up but missed a double ax handle, landing face first on the barricade. FREAKING OW MAN! Calo suplexes him back in as they try to do the Warrior/Rude finish from Mania 5, but Sonny misses the foot, making Calo look completely inept. Too short to rate but it was pretty pedestrian stuff.

Post match Calo beats down Psychosis but La Parka comes out and breaks a wooden chair over Calo’s back for the second time. Juventud Guerrera comes out for the save.

Hour #2 starts.

Steve McMichael/Ric Flair/Chris Benoit vs. Buff Bagwell/Masahiro Chono/Scott Norton

Bagwell and Flair start things off and we get a strutting competition. Buff pounds on Flair in the corner and it’s off to Mongo who has a dumb look on his face. Mongo gets caught in the wrong corner but he comes back with right hands to Chono. Back to Flair who pounds away for about five seconds before Benoit comes in to a nice reaction. Chono kicks him down but stops to argue with Flair, allowing Benoit to clothesline Chono down and hit the Swan Dive. Everything breaks down and Vincent comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as the whole match wasn’t even four minutes long and had the NWO DQ as required by WCW law. Also I’m not sure what was accomplished here at all, but on a shot this big I can understand the matches being this short. It isn’t fun to sit through but it’s understandable.

High Voltage vs. Mortis/Wrath

Wrath pounds on Kaos in the corner and things break down in about twenty seconds. A top rope clothesline puts Kaos down and the squash is on. Glacier and Miller come to ringside and the distraction draws Wrath to the floor, allowing Cat (Miller) to kick Mortis in the face and give High Voltage the big upset.

A limo is in the back. Presumably this is the impact player. The door opens, the camera zooms in on it, and the door closes.

Road Report.

Raven is in the front row and the announcers all know who he is. He’s mentioned as a champion from elsewhere but ECW isn’t mentioned by name of course. Tenay thinks he might be the Impact Player or Page’s mystery partner.

US Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Konnan

I think this is for the title but I’m not sure. Jeff pounds him down to start but misses an enziguri, allowing Konnan to hit a low dropkick to take over. Jarrett comes back with a DDT but Konnan takes it to the mat and hooks a kind of abdominal stretch on the mat. Konnan loads up a Figure Four but a rake to the eyes breaks it up. Here come the Horsemen who distract Konnan and allow Jeff to take the knee out and put on the Figure Four….which is almost immediately turned over. Jeff turns it back over and Flair helps Jeff with some extra leverage for the tap out.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here again with another match feeling like pure filler. I just hope this doesn’t lead to more problems for the Horsemen as that story has been going on for about a year now. Jarrett never clicked at all in WCW and he felt forced in there as a Horseman. How many US Title shots is Konnan going to get anyway?

Post match Jeff brags about everyone he’s beaten but Flair says Jarrett is off the team. Halle-freaking-lujah. Jarrett says you can’t do that. Flair is like dude, I’m Ric Flair. Debra runs her mouth for a bit and Jarrett says he’s going to put Flair out. Benoit talks about how Jarrett blew his chance. This didn’t make a ton of sense, but anything that gets Jarrett out of the Horsemen is cool with me.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Kevin Nash

Rey goes right at him and takes Nash down, but a sunset flip goes about as badly as you would expect it to for Mysterio. Nash LAUNCHES Mysterio across the ring and the Jackknife ends this quick. So Mysterio stands up to the NWO and is promptly destroyed. Thanks for wasting our time on that guys.

Nash drops Mysterio again and hits the referee too. Konnan comes out as Nash powerbombs Rey a third time. Nash leaves and Konnan puts on the Tequila Sunrise, apparently joining the NWO. Mysterio is taken out on a stretcher.

Tenay goes to talk to Raven but Raven won’t say anything.

Diamond Dallas Page/Lex Luger/The Giant vs. Randy Savage/Outsiders

Main event time. We take a break before the match starts and come back to see the NWO still not letting WCW in, just like what we saw before the break. Luger and Giant finally get in and the match gets going. Page goes right for Savage and WCW rules the ring to start. Hall gets in a shot on Luger, and according to wrestling law, the rest of the NWO takes over at the exact same time. All six guys are still in the ring and I don’t think we’ve had a bell yet.

Savage and Page fight to the floor before getting right back into the ring. We still haven’t had two people alone in the ring yet. Luger goes down so Giant headbutts both Outsiders down at the same time. Giant charges at them both but gets backdropped to the floor. Here comes Hogan and Page Diamond Cuts Savage. Hogan blasts Luger with the belt on the floor and apparently he took Giant out with it earlier. Page gets beaten down and I think the match is thrown out. It never started I don’t think so I won’t rate it, but it was just a big brawl anyway.

The NWO destroys Page as Hogan walks around on the floor. Savage hits a second elbow and Sting is in the crowd. Savage hits a third elbow and another Sting drops in from the rafters. Hogan bails and Sting clears the ring. Curt Hennig walks down the aisle and the show ends with him doing nothing at all. Raven jumps the guardrail, which is some of the only main event interaction I ever remember him having in WCW.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a back and forth show. It feels like a big show for sure, given all of the matches they had on here and some of the stuff they had going on, but nothing on here is anything more than ok from a quality standpoint. That being said, we had a lot of stuff on here and it certainly feels like a big show, which is what they were shooting for. The ending looks really interesting, but the important question is how will they follow up on it.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

On Impact this last week, Hogan came out with TJ Perkins and said Perkins had always been Suicide.  Why is this such a topic of discussion?It’s well documented that Perkins hasn’t always been the guy playing the character.  TJ joined the roster earlier this year and Suicide was around like four or five years ago.  However, nearly every post I’ve seen about this has said how stupid it is for Hogan to lie about it.  THis is where smarks crack me up.  They claim to be so smart and knowledgeable that they miss the entire point of wrestling at times: it’s all one big lie.

So often these are the same people that whine and complain about how bored they are with modern wrestling, yet when a character on a wrestling show does something different or old school like this, the “fans’ freak out about how stupid it is.  Is Hogan telling the truth?  No, but then again neither is almost anyone on the show when they say anything at all.

Here’s a little something for you all to chew on: isn’t it interesting that the two peaks of wrestling, the Golden Era of the 80s and the Attitude Era, were all about being as unrealistic as possible?  It’s almost like the formula that made wrestling work in the first place (this is all fake and the fans are just along for the ride) never needed to be tweaked at all and when it does, the results are nowhere near as successful.

Then again that would mean that internet fans and smarks are mostly schnooks that have no idea what they’re talking about and are nowhere near as smart as they think they are and are actually bad for the business.  That just couldn’t be true, could it?

Superbrawl Revenge
Date: February 18, 2001
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 4,395
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson

It’s the final show in this trilogy that I’m doing as we wrap up Superbrawl thankfully with them cutting the numbers out. The main event here is Steiner vs. Nash in a 2/3 falls retirement vs. title match so take a guess who’s losing. Other than that the matches are at least different than the other matches we’ve seen in the previous two months. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of what would probably be a criminal or a psycho cutting out letters to make the word revenge. Yeah let’s get on with this.

Tony isn’t sure if Nash is here or not.

We get a clip from earlier in the day as Animal jumped Kidman to take him out of the opening match.

??? vs. Shannon Moore vs. Kaz Hayashi vs. Yun Yang vs. Evan Karagis vs. Jamie Knoble

This is a 4 corner 6 man elimination match. In other words you have two in the ring and one in every corner and it’s tagging in and out in an elimination match. We get a clip of Knoble and Karagis qualifying beating a team called Air Raid. That team was comprised of Air Paris and Air Styles. Styles started going by his initials: A.J. You may have heard of him and yes, he was in WCW for awhile. The entrances take forever and the replacement is Shane Helms, making it ANOTHER combination of these six.

This isn’t for a title or anything other than bragging rights as far as I can tell. For some reason Shane being the partner is SHOCKING even though there are two other teams in there. Knoble and Moore start us off. Oh apparently the winner gets a title shot at Greed. Knoble can’t get a tombstone so they slug it out instead. Belly to back gets two for Knoble. Shane tags himself in to face Jamie and 3 Count gets some double teaming to take Jamie down but not out.

Everything breaks down and Moore is sent crashing to the floor. The Dragons take out 3 Count with stereo Asai Moonsaults. The Dragons beat on Knoble a bit now but Karagis takes Yang out with a springboard cross body. Yang and Knoble speed things WAY up and Knoble gets a neckbreaker for two. Knoble brings in Karagis and it turns into a brawl. Full nelson slam puts Yang down and Evan hammers away a bit but hurts himself on a back splash.

Shane comes in and beats the tar out of both Karagis and Yang. Yang grabs a rollup for two but Shannon makes a blind tag and some double teaming takes down Yang. Scott forgets that this is elimination because he’s not that intelligent. Everything breaks down and Kaz pops Helms only to get jumped by Evan. Shane gets a superplex to Kaz and everyone misses dives off the top in a cool looking sequence.

The tagging stuff has been thrown completely out at this point. 3 Count gets a sweet double teaming move to Kaz as Shane dives all over the place. Now Kaz gets a huge spinning dive as does everyone else. Karagis gets a big spinning spinebuster to Yang and then does his driving the Cadillac and talking on the cell phone taunt. Knoble and Karagis argue over who should pin Yang because they’re not very intelligent.

Yang botches what looked like a Lionsault and slips off the ropes. He settles for a neckbreaker to put out Karagis. Tombstone to Yang by Knoble gets rid of the future Resident Redneck seconds later. Knoble sends Moore flying to the floor and it’s Helms vs. Knoble at the moment. Moore gets a Fameasser off the top on Knoble and we have Moore, Helms and Kaz yet.

3 Count double teams Kaz as you would expect them to do. Moore gets a backslide and Helms adds a leg drop to Kaz’s exposed neck. That’s INSANE when you think about it. Samoan drop/neckbreaker combination kills Kaz but they don’t go for a cover. Moore grabs a Fameasser on Helms to be a jerk for two but Kaz kicks him for no apparent reason and hits the referee at the same time. Do they not realize this is ELIMINATION???

Helms beats on Moore but takes a low blow to put him down. Kaz and Moore beat on Helms before fighting each other. Kaz sets for a moonsault but Moore pushes Helms out of the way so that Kaz crashes. Nightmare on Helm Street takes Moore out and we’re down to Kaz vs. Helms. They fight over suplexes with Kaz getting a German for two (make your own international jokes). Top rope sunset flip by Helms is reversed into a BIG swinging kick by Kaz for two. They grapple a bit more and Helms gets a Vertebreaker to end this finally.

Rating: B-. The match ran nearly 20 minutes which made it feel long. Also the people not seeming to grasp the rules at various points hurt it a lot also. Good match and fun but the ending was never really in danger. And of course these people would keep feuding until WCW went out of business because having the best matches in the company wasn’t worth being advanced right?

We see security camera footage of Flair and Animal talking when Chavo comes up to them which would imply that Chavo put a hit out on Kidman.

General Rection says he brought the Wall into MIA and made him awesome. The Wall has joined Chavo now and attacked the remaining Misfits. This is Hugh Morrus though, not General Rection. Ok then.

Flair comes in to talk to Steiner who says this is about the future and hands him an envelope which he says contains Nash’s future.

Kronik talks to Lance Storm who is now Commissioner. Clark is hurt apparently but has been cleared. If he isn’t cleared by the company doctor he can wrestle. Adams can’t go with him.

Hugh Morrus vs. The Wall

Wall turned on Morrus and beat him up at various times so now it’s the big fight. Morrus tries to shove the referee out of the way and gets beaten down with ease instead. We hear about new ownership which is a real thing that was supposed to be done by Bischoff and his investment group, but that fell through due to Nitro and Thunder being canceled.

We head to the floor quickly and Wall is sent into the barricade. Wall is rammed into the steps and the steps are rammed into Wall. Well at least it’s even. Morrus picks up the steps and drops them on Wall as it’s ALL Morrus here. The fans want tables as we head back into the ring. Top rope elbow gets no cover. Morrus runs into a big boot and they’re both down.

Wall gets a hand on Morrus for two and then chops away in the corner. He gets on the ropes and tries a sleeper that would be like a hangman’s noose but Morrus gets a jawbreaker, despite the jaw and shoulder not colliding at all. Top rope legdrop by Wall misses and both are down again. Spinebuster by Morrus puts both guys down again. Am I watching a reenactment of Taker vs. HHH from Mania 26?

Low blow by Morrus and he fails at a hot shot so he chokes away a bit. They do the hot shot again which is stupid but that’s a lecture for a different time. This one connects for two though so it’s not like it matters. And they’re down again. I’m really starting to think Taker and HHH studied this before their match in 2011. Pancake hits and they’re both down AGAIN. The opening was good but dang man. Did they forget their naps earlier?

Hudson talks about them leaving everything in the ring and that’s why this is called Revenge. What in the world does that have to do with Revenge? Shouldn’t that be called Superbrawl: Never Quit or something like that? Piledriver can’t connect for Wall so Morrus gets a backdrop to put them both…..you know what I’m going to say so I’ll save you the time here. They slug it out from their knees as Hudson says this isn’t wrestling. Wow they were ahead of their time in WCW. German suplex to the Wall. Shouldn’t it be a Berlin suplex? No Laughing Matter (moonsault) ends this.

Rating: D. Good opening part but after that it went too long and got sloppy. Also, WAY too much laying around out there which hurt the match a lot. This should have been cut down by about 3-4 minutes and it would have gotten a lot better. Morrus was better than given credit for but he wasn’t a miracle worker.

Konnan tries to go see Flair but brawls with Animal instead.

We recap the tag title match which is between two teams of Natural Born Thrillers. They’ve broken up recently over one pair trying to help the other and failing. There was talk of jealousy and all that jazz. Oh and one carried the other. You can fill in the details yourself I think.

Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo vs. Mark Jindrak/Shawn Stasiak

Stasiak makes fun of the Titans, the NFL team in town, to establish his team as the heels. Palumbo and O’Haire have the title here. Big brawl to start and it’s hard to keep track of. Stasiak and O’Haire are your starters. Stasiak is all fired up here and hammers away with clotheslines for two. Konnan has been thrown out of the building by Flair. Off to Jindrak who is caught in a hot shot which mostly hits.

Palumbo comes in with that awesome right hand of his. They’re tagging in and out very fast here. The champions do the Haas/Benjamin jump over the guy and land on the opponent’s back move to Jindrak. Jindrak was probably the weakest of these four. Well maybe not as long as Stasiak was in there. Palumbo gets a weird move to Jindrak. Think of a hiptoss but when he lifts Jindrak in the air he falls backwards on him. That was kind of cool actually.

The challengers get O’Haire down for some Horsemen stomping. Arn and Tully they’re not though as Palumbo hammers them both but can’t get a DDT. Double kip up by the challengers and stereo elbows as Palumbo plays Ricky Morton. Bulldog by Stasiak gets two and it’s off to Jindrak again who also gets two. O’Haire is all fired up on the apron as he has to watch his partner get double teamed.

Stasiak gets a clothesline for two and it’s off to Jindrak again. Off to the chinlock now as Jindrak continues to be incredibly dull in the ring. Sean finally pops in without a tag to drill Jindrak which gets him nowhere. Stasiak comes back in and throws on an armbar. Small package by Palumbo for two. Tilt-a-whirl gets two for Jindrak and it’s back to Stasiak.

He goes up top and misses a splash by a mile. The tips of his feet would have missed Palumbo by about a foot anyway. Jawbreaker by Palumbo and it’s off to O’Haire for a big pop. He clotheslines everyone and after a brief beatdown, a pair of superkicks from the champions sets up a Sean-ton Bomb to end it. His is better than Hardy’s as he hits more with his shoulders than his back and it looks awesome.

Rating: C+. They worked the formula here and had a good match, but it felt rushed for some reason. The problem here is that they all look similar and they all have a very similar style and it got a bit dull after awhile. O’Haire was clearly the top guy out there and of course in WWE he was probably featured the least. Typical.

Dustin Rhodes says his family doesn’t like Flair’s Family. Tonight it’s him vs. Rick Steiner because WCW isn’t that intelligent.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey comes out in a boxer’s robe throwing shadow punches. I give up. Animal has been helping Chavo for no adequately explored reason. Rey has horns on his head, overalls and a big cross around his neck. Oh and no mask. How did they manage to screw up Rey Mysterio? Dropkick puts Chavo on the floor but he can’t get a dive. Chavo gets back in and tries a sunset bomb but takes a rana to send him to the concrete.

Rey gets draped over the top rope for two as Chavo takes over. Superplex is blocked by Rey but he gets crotched on the top rope and lands in the Tree of Woe. After some dropkicks to the ribs, Chavo tries what can be called a spear but Rey gets out of the way, sending Chavo’s arm into the post. Rey can’t capitalize and winds up in the Gory Special. That’s always a cool move to see Chavo bust out.

Rey escapes quickly as Chavo tries to get it back on but shifts over to a Gory Bomb which is like a flapjack but with Rey being on Chavo’s back to start. Out to the floor now with Chavo in full control. Back in the ring and Rey tries a springboard moonsault press but Chavo catches him. Rey sends him into the corner but gets caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to end that flurry.

STF by Chavo. Odd though as I can still see him. Rey escapes, only to be sent out to the floor one more time. Sorry for the lack of jokes here but Chavo was so good at this point that he more or less didn’t have bad matches. Chavo sends him knee first into the steps and the challenger is in trouble. Before he throws Rey back in, Chavo steals a fan’s Rey mask and puts it on Rey, which would more or less get him shot in Mexico.

Chavo goes up, only to get crotched which brings him right back down. Rey puts the mask on Chavo and “hits” an awful rana for two. The champion gets sent to the floor and grabs the title, apparently to leave. Rey counters with a slingshot seated senton to take over even further. In the ring he tries what appears to be a Lionsault but falls flat on his back off the ropes. Lot of botching by Rey tonight.

Chavo goes to the floor again and grabs a chair. The knee gets smacked and Chavo gets a hot shot out of an electric chair. Rey gets back up and takes over but doesn’t look right still. He tries a big springboard move but falls AGAIN. Who does he think he is, Sin Cara? Rey sends him into the ring and gets a falling headbutt for two. DDT sets up the Bronco Buster. Rey picks up the chair from earlier which is taken away by the referee. Chavo grabs another chair and pops him with it. Brainbuster ends it with Chavo retaining.

Rating: B. And that’s mainly due to Chavo. Rey was WAY off here and it’s probably the worst performance I’ve ever seen out of him. Chavo was incredible at this point though so it was no big deal for him to carry the match. Good stuff overall and I liked the heel ending from the heel champion. Good match here with a great old school flavor to it.

Storm, the Commissioner for the month, changes the order of the matches and Brian Adams isn’t happy with it.

We recap Dustin Rhodes vs. Rick Steiner. Dustin came back and Flair wanted him in the Magnificent Seven but he turned it down. Nash kidnapped Flair’s son and said give Rhodes a match with Steiner or else. Dustin beat Steiner and got reinstated plus a US Title shot here.

US Title: Rick Steiner vs. Dustin Rhodes

Just let it sink in that this is the midcard title match in 2001. We hear about Goldberg but he’s gone at the moment. Dustin jumps Steiner as he comes in and we’re ready to go. Rick is absolutely worthless at this point and wouldn’t sell at all but he used to be a big star so here he is. Steiner ducks a cross body and Dustin goes flying out to the floor to give Rick his first advantage.

Steiner Line gets two and is followed by knees to the head. Belly to belly gets two and we hit an awful chinlock. Dustin does the standard escape out of it but misses an elbow. Half crab goes on and this is horribly boring. Apparently Steiner is taking Dustin’s soul here. Off to another chinlock because the fans were starting to care a bit.

Dustin fights up again and Dustin hammers away with various stuff including a clothesline for two. Bulldog hits and Rick hits the floor. Into the announce table and Dustin grabs a chair. The referee tells him not to as he takes the role of babysitter. Steiner takes the turnbuckle pad off and a hot shot puts Dustin into it. Steiner covers him and puts his feet on the ropes to end it.

Rating: D-. Rick Steiner gets a singles push in 2001. This is what people talk about when they say stupid booking with old guys getting pushed too much. I mean let’s see. Who do you have to be US Champion here? Any of the Thrillers, Storm, Awesome, Kidman, Mysterio, Chavo, you get the point. Match was awful too.

Dustin gives him Shattered Dreams post match.

Flair comes up to Storm and says he wants Dustin and everyone else not on their team out of the building after their matches. Also Kronik vs. Totally Buff is now a #1 contenders match.

Miller and Page are getting ready for Storm.

Totally Buff vs. Kronik

Wow that sounds like a pair of indy teams if I’ve ever heard one. The fans chant for Goldberg and Totally Buff says he was fired. They run their mouths for awhile longer and we’re told that Brian Clark hasn’t been released to wrestle yet. So it’s a handicap match now with Adams fighting both of them. Oh never mind there he is. The lights are still out for the entrance though and we can’t see Clark. Yeah we know what’s coming so just get to it.

Clark is put down by a chair shot so it’s a handicap match anyway. Adams gets a terrible double DDT but can’t get a full nelson slam on Luger due to a low blow. Off to Bagwell and we begin the standard double teaming and tagging in and out by the heels. Other than that double DDT it’s been all heels here. Camel clutch by Luger and he poses a bit. Luger jumps up and down on his back a few times but gets caught in a double knee to the Package’s package.

Bagwell goes down also and it’s off to Adams in control. He fires away with basic stuff that doesn’t really get him anywhere. Totally Buff sets for a double team Blockbuster but Adams fights off Luger’s shoulders and gets a belly to back suplex to take him down. You know, if Bagwell had actually, I don’t know, DONE SOMETHING OTHER THAN STAND ON THE ROPES AND WATCHED, Adams might not have been able to take over like that.

Anyway we get an attempted full nelson slam to Bagwell but Clark apparently turns on Adams and drills him. Ah but it’s a ruse and it’s Mike Awesome in Clark attire with a wig. Why is that the case you ask? No one knows, but my guess would be because it makes no sense and makes Awesome even more worthless than he was before. Rack and the Blockbuster ends Adams quickly.

Rating: D. Hey what do you know? It’s a pointless match that isn’t any good with a screwy ending that makes no sense. Who in the world would have seen that coming? Awesome continues to be completely wasted (no match tonight) and again, NO ONE CARES ABOUT LUGER AND BAGWELL!!! Terrible match….again.

Adams and the real Clark are thrown out of the building, but they beat up security first anyway.

Lance Storm vs. The Cat

Winner is the Commissioner because we need two authority figures right? Cat comes out to interrupt the national anthem and they compete for cheers. Just get to the boring match. They trade wristlocks to start with Storm taking over and getting booed. The announcers talk about how Cat is the only person standing in the way of Flair having total power in WCW. If that’s the case, why would Flair allow him to have this match?

Cat gets a kick and sends Storm to the floor where he walks around for awhile. We hear that Nash isn’t here tonight again to try to build up even more drama. Storm pulls Cat to the floor and takes over as this isn’t much at all. Tony gets on Storm for being a heel saying “that’s our commissioner?” Yes, we clearly need the guy in the tiger print jumpsuit that says SOMEBODY CALL MY MAMA on the back of it.

Storm works on the knee as we’ve been on the floor for about a minute now. Cat tries to make his comeback but Storm keeps working on the knee as we’re finally back in the ring. Storm proves that he works for Flair as he goes up, only to get slammed off the top. Back to the floor again and Storm wraps the knee around the post some more.

Miller blocks a sunset flip and does that stupid crotch chop of his before his dancing elbow drop. Storm catches the Feliner and puts on the Maple Leaf for a few seconds. Miller makes his comeback with what else? Kicks of course. Here comes Mike Sanders, only to get taken out by Ms. Jones. Feliner and Miller is Commissioner again.

Rating: D+. This would be between D+ and D but Jones looks good so we’ll give it the benefit of the doubt. The stips were stupid and the match was boring but you can’t ask Storm to be a miracle worker in there. I think this would be the last Commissioner changing of the guard but does anyone really care?

We recap Jarrett vs. Page which involves Kanyon somehow. They don’t like each other and that’s about it.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Miller has been thrown out of the building also. His powers don’t kick in until midnight. Good thing he’s not a superhero as that would be problematic at times. Jarrett comes out second and says there’s something to get done before the match starts. We get a clip from last week with Page saying anywhere anytime to Kanyon, so here we go.

Kanyon vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Kanyon comes out (not of the closet yet) from under the ring to jump DDP which fails completely. We hit the floor and it’s all Page so far. Kanyon gets draped over the railing and Page spanks him. Oh dear. Ten punches in the corner are reversd by a low blow which the referee is all cool with. Back to the floor again and Page goes back first into the railing. Jarrett is nowhere to be found.

From the apron, Kanyon hits a Fameasser to the steps in a cool looking spot, busting Page open a bit. Kanyon continues his unorthodox offense by standing on the middle rope while on the inside and suplexing Page into the ring from the apron for two. Page tries to fight back but walks into a Northern Lights Suplex for two. After a modified facejam we’re off to the chinlock.

Page takes a swinging neckbreaker for two. Samoan Drop (I think. You never know with Kanyon) is reversed into a sunset flip for two. Discus lariat puts both guys down. Page gets up and another discus lariat puts Kanyon down. Spinning Rock Bottom gets two. Sitout Alabama Slam gets two for Kanyon. Sitout powerbomb gets two for DDP. They like these sitout moves. Diamond Cutter is reversed into the Kanyon Cutter (same move) and here’s Jarrett. Down goes the referee and of course Jarrett comes in with a Stroke for Page. Flatliner (Downward Spiral) ends Page.

Rating: C. Not a terrible match here but it was just there to set up the next match which is ok I guess. We got a decent match out of it also so that helps. Page is a good worker and you never would believe he was in his mid 40s. This worked fine and makes Page look weaker going into the main match, which is fine as long as he wins it.

Kanyon does the introductions for this.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Jarrett does his full intro again. We head into the crowd almost immediately as Page is more or less nothing. Also remember that he has the cut next to his eye so he’s losing blood rapidly. Page grabs some stuff to drill Jarrett with. Looks like a trashcan. For no apparent reason we go to a wide shot for a bit so you have to kind of guess where they are.

Back to ringside and we head to the announce table. DDT on the table to Jarrett but it doesn’t break. Cutter is blocked and DDP lands on Tony. Chair to the ribs of DDP and the evil one takes over again. After some stomping, Page gets a discus lariat (third in about 4 minutes) to take Jarrett down but DDP is taken down again very quickly. We hit a sleeper and here it makes a lot of sense as Page is spent.

The crowd reacts really well to Page holding the arm up on the sleeper. Page throws the sleeper on Jarrett but it only lasts a few seconds. DDT out of nowhere puts Jarrett down and it’s a double knockout at the moment. Both back up and Page hammers away. Ten buckles to Jarrett’s head set up a belly to back suplex for two. Belly to belly gets the same.

Page gets a Pancake (picture a Piledriver but Page jumps forward to slam Jarrett’s face into the mat). It gets two as Kanyon pulls Page out. With Page chasing after Kanyon, Jarrett pops Page in the back with a chair which somehow only gets two. Guitar misses Page and Kanyon is done. Diamond Cutter (BIG pop for that too. LISTEN WCW!!!) and Jarrett is done in a great moment for Page.

Rating: C+. Better match here than the previous one but dude, it’s Jarrett vs. Page. The problem in WCW is very apparent here though: Page just had two solid matches against a guy that means nothing and one of the “old” guys. Why not do this with two of the Thrillers or Storm for example? The company died for reasons like those.

We recap Nash vs. Steiner. Steiner was the monster heel and the crown jewel of the Magnificent Seven with Nash being the current great white hope (Booker was still injured at this point). Nash’s knee was destroyed six days before this.

Here’s Flair as the announcers talk about the envelope that Flair had earlier (scroll way up if you don’t remember it). Flair does commentary for the title match.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner

And once again, two old guys are in the main event. Better than four old guys I guess. Steiner does his whole entrance and there’s no Nash. Steiner runs off Michael Buffer which is funny for some reason. We see the clip from Sin where Sid broke his leg and it literally makes me shake and cringe. Flair gets in the ring and makes it a retirement match. This would be probably Nash’s 3rd retirement match of the year or so. He’s 0-2 at the moment.

If Steiner loses he loses the title and his career and it’s against only Nash’s career. Not really fair. Nash’s music kicks on as the referee is counting. And he’s in a wheelchair with a cast on his leg. Nash stands up and gets in the ring. He grabs the belt and blasts Steiner in the head with it, getting the pin in 10 seconds. Flair makes it 2/3 falls. I think I know where this is going. It’s No DQ also.

In the back, Totally Buff beats up DDP and locks him in an anvil case. Holy random moment Batman! Nash beats up Steiner a bit because he can and doesn’t go for the Jackknife for no apparent reason. The beating goes on for a few minutes as everyone knows we’re just waiting to get to more shenanigans. Out to the floor and it’s all Nash. Midajah tries to interfere and it works, allowing Steiner to bash Nash in the head with a pipe. Nash is out cold on the floor so Steiner shouts to Flair to make it falls count anywhere. Flair says cool and it’s tied up.

Flair says on headset that the first fall didn’t count for no apparent reason. Brass knuckle shots from Steiner should mean Nash is dead but he gets back in a few seconds later. Both guys are busted a bit. Spinning belly to belly gets two and Steiner does his basic stuff. T-Bone gets two. It’s about 3am while I’m reviewing this and it’s ending my insomnia quickly.

Steiner gets the knucks again but can’t do anything with them. Sidewalk slam puts both guys down. Nash hit it if you were curious. Flair has Midajah take the knuckles out of Nash’s reach and hands Steiner a chair. Big shot to the head of Nash and the Recliner goes on. Nash just moves his arms and turns it into a regular chinlock which he escapes pretty easily, sending Scott to the floor.

They slug it out in the middle of the ring and Nash gets a chokeslam for two. Midajah tries to jump the referee which gets her nowhere. Snake eyes and a big boot set up the Jackknife and I wonder what they’re going to do to break the pin up. It would be Midajah again and she gets a side slam for her trouble. Another cover but Flair pulls the referee out and drills him. Low blow and a chair shot by Steiner sets up the Recliner to end this finally.

Rating: D. It’s another mess of a main event with very limited wrestling plus a ton of shenanigans here. Match was more or less nothing of course as there’s no need to have Nash vs. Steiner and various other old people in the main event but hey, that’s just common sense so who cares? Goldberg was (I’m assuming) healthy but this is what we get instead. Bad match but I think that’s the point here.

Nash is called the heart and soul of WCW. I give up.

Overall Rating: D+. Hard one to grade here as there’s some good stuff but they knew the new owners were coming in so they were more or less just holding down the fort. It’s definitely not the worst show they’ve ever done as the cruiserweight stuff was good and Page’s stuff was good, but the middle part of this show is just dreadfully boring on all accounts. Not terrible, but they knew they were in trouble and it was flat out too late.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

Night of Champions 2008
Date: June 29, 2008
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 16,151
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mike Adamle, Jim Ross, Joey Styles, Tazz, Mick Foley

So after the whole Benoit thing, they guys decided that calling it VENGEANCE was a bad idea so Night of Champions was born. This is kind of a finale to Vengeance but kind of not but that doesn’t really matter. As you likely know, everything here is a title match so there’s that fun aspect at least. The card is ok at best with Cena vs. HHH as the main event. This was a really bad time for the company as the cards just sucked. Also, HHH and Edge are the champions and both are on Smackdown. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about being a champion. Well at least they kept it simple. Batista is after Edge and La Familia. It’s his last title shot too. Cena wants HHH and HHH wants Cena. Good to see that they care about each other.

Shinedown is doing the theme song. Things are looking up.

Smackdown Tag Titles: John Morrison/Miz vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle

Please make it short. They already did that didn’t they? Do I need to explain to you why this is a dumb match? And the fans pop for the challengers because that’s what Satan told them to do. The tall guy and the Monday Night Delight start us off. Ross and Foley are a weird pairing on commentary. Horny is listed at 4’4. Why did Vince wonder why we didn’t like the company in 08?

We do get a spot that I haven’t seen before as Morrison jumps over the rope and gets crotched on the ring skirt. I’ve never seen that before. Finlay starts throwing Horny into Miz and Morrison as a projectile. This is a comedy match that forgot the comedy. How weird is it to think that two years later Miz could be a potential MITB winner? I wouldn’t be surprised if he won it. Miz and Morrison were really starting to get good here but wouldn’t hit their stride for a few more months.

Horny comes in and beats up Miz, hitting a Stunner and a bulldog. None of these do anything of course since HE IS TINY. The problem becomes clear here very soon: the heels have to either beat up Horny or have him get the hot tag. Finlay beats up everyone after such a tag and the fans care for some reason. Horny goes up for the splash and Morrison finally realizes how stupid this is and more or less chokeslams him to the mat, ending this annoyance.

Rating: D. I mean seriously, it’s a freaking midget and an old man against a good and young team. Was this really the best option they had? They wanted this to make this a serious match and it just completely failed. It was a hybrid comedy match and mess and just didn’t work. They wanted Horny to be something serious and it just didn’t work so of course they kept going with it forever.

We get a quick thing on Mania 22 where HHH tapped to Cena to end the show. There’s a text thing as to who wins tonight: Cena, Batista, both or none. I’d answer but I know it already. I’ll do it anyway: Both.

US Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Matt Hardy

La Familia gets their first match here and you can feel the idea of the stable dying every moment. Chavo has Bam Neeley with him here and is challenging. Ross says Hardy is popular and talented. Make your own jokes. That’s not really fair as Matt tries to an extent but when he’s most commonly associated with Edge, Christian and Jeff, he looks pretty weak by comparison.

The crowd is very behind Hardy here. I’ve never gotten why he’s so incredibly popular. He’s nowhere near as bad as he’s made out to be but he’s no second coming of Austin or anything. They’ve been fighting for about five minutes so far and nothing of note has happened really. Chavo works on his knee for some psychology. Did you expect a Guerrero to not have something in there?

Side Effect gets two and a solid pop. Chavo gets a half crab as this match just isn’t doing anything for me. It’s ok, but there’s just nothing here of substance at all. Matt does some stuff and then Chavo does some stuff, then they repeat it. Chavo goes Three Amigos which gets booed in Texas. That’s just odd. And Matt counters out of nowhere into a Twist of Fate to retain. Well that was abrupt.

Rating: D. This just wasn’t very good at all. It wasn’t horrible I guess but at the same time this just had nothing special about it at all. The match was like 9 minutes long and it just came and went. It’s a match that felt like a match for the sake of having a title match which isn’t something you want to see.

Tony Dorsett is here. OH YES!

We recap the Vince gets crushed thing which went nowhere.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

Oh it’s Mike Adamle again. He would be Raw GM soon enough and things went bad to an extent. Tazz has to anchor the commentary here and that just is not going to work. Show won a match at One Night Stand to get here and Henry is here because Vince wants him to be. Kane comes in as champion. Seriously, give him a world title reign. The guy has to job to people like Henry and people wonder why he doesn’t stay over. By the way Kane is on Raw after the Draft six days before this and the US Title is on ECW. God bless WWE logic.

We get big match intros for the first time tonight which is kind of weird. Adamle is trying here and I can always give him credit for something like that. Oh seriously what are you expecting here? Kane is the smallest guy in this match. What do you think they’re doing? Of course: tapdancing. Yeah that joke sucked. Anyway they’re just doing power stuff that is supposed to impress us and it would if we hadn’t seen these guys fight like 100 times each before.

Kane comes back up and gets a solid pop. They had the white ropes even back in 08? I never noticed that before. The bald guys hit a double chokeslam on Henry and then they fight. Stop me if this sounds like every other triple threat match ever. Show hits Kane with one as well and since Henry is a big fat tub of goo, Kane has to kick out on his own. You know,

Adamle really isn’t that bad. He truly isn’t. He just gets such a bad reputation for what he would do later on. He didn’t have a background for this and got thrown on the top company in the world and did his best. Kane puts Show down and then Henry splashes him in the corner for the pin. This would result in him getting his huge belt soon afterwards.

Rating: D+. Not bad again but still just a big mess as these three had nothing of note as far as working together went. Kane was the most agile guy out there and he was down for a good chunk of this. Matches like these rarely work and this was no exception. Henry got pushed for no reason at all and his reign bombed. Matt Hardy would take it like 3 months later. Kane would turn heel like the next night.

Batista is with Eve who is still an interviewer here. He says that he’s not going back to Raw empty handed. He says he’s going to be the man on Raw and Cena is right there in front of him. Cena says Dave might not be the only champion by the end of the night. And here’s Punk, saying he hopes they both win because the briefcase is getting heavy.

Raw Tag Titles: Ted DiBiase/??? Vs. Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly

Holly and Rhodes have held the titles since December and everyone is sick of them. Also, everyone and their mother knows that Cody is the one jumping here. DiBiase has been around like two weeks at this point so he’s the hottest thing on the planet. His first catchphrase, “Everybody’s got a price, but I’m priceless” more or less blew the Raw LD to pieces. Lillian should wear red forever. She just should.

Rhodes and Holly are both in lime green tights. This is Ted’s debut. Lillian says here is his partner but Ted grabs the mic and says his partner is on his way and he needs ten minutes. Threatened with forfeiting, Ted says start it and the partner will get here. Cody starts but Ted wants Holly. He’s the only one I’d bet. And immediately there it is: Cody kicks Holly in the ribs and hits a DDT, forming what would become Legacy. Cody also becomes the first person to ever lose and win a tag title in the same match. Well kind of I guess. No rating, but a cool moment considering what these guys would become.

HHH has a new DVD.

JBL is in a private box and is mad that he’s not on the Night of Champions PPV. Todd says because he isn’t a champion and JBL’s slow turn is great. His promos really were awesome but his matches just flat out sucked for the most part. He runs down Dallas for not winning anything. This really is a great promo.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. ???

Jericho is still a face here but that wouldn’t last long. Ah he’s in the middle of his turn here. That makes sense. The mystery opponent is not HBK according to Jericho due to him injuring Shawn more than once already. Jericho in long tights just doesn’t look right for some reason. I was at a house show about a week later and his eye seemed fine to me. Jericho says he’s an honest man. Oh dang it’s he’s Alberto Del Rio now. Some Jamaican music cuts Jericho off and the opponent is Kofi.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi has been on Raw for six days at this point, having come over from ECW in the Draft. People knew he had something but the universal response was that this was too soon for him. This is more or less his big debut. Kofi starts busting out stuff that is normal for him now but back in the day was brand new stuff. Kofi hits that Frog Splash cross body for two.

The problem is that since not a lot of people watch ECW, not a lot of people know much about Kofi. You get a feeling here that they’re just kind of meandering along waiting on the big finish, which should be pretty clear if you’re paying attention. The fans chant boring for no apparent reason. The match is slow but not boring. Kofi starts busting out the insane dropkicks to kill the chants and hits the Boom Drop which has no name yet.

The Walls are blocked and another Boom Drop gets a long two. Jericho busts out the Liontamer and Shawn finally makes the required run in to distract Jericho so Kofi can kick him right in the forearm for the pin and his first title. This was what the IC Title was supposed to be about: a young guy that needs some credibility getting a title to give him some. Post match Shawn is helped out and Jericho punches him in his bad eye.

Rating: C+. Kofi wasn’t anywhere near what he would become but he was still pretty good. Jericho put him over here and the ending was solid. Kingston wasn’t ready to beat Jericho yet and he didn’t. Has Jericho ever beaten Kofi clean? I think he has but I’m not sure. Anyway, this was more about furthering the Shawn/Jericho feud without making Shawn go for the IC Title and on that front it did very well.

Edge complains to his cronies (including wedding planner Alicia Fox and the Edgeheads: Curt Hawkins and Zach Ryder) that he doesn’t need any help tonight.

We see the debut of the Vince/Cena razor commercial. Thank you for wasting that 30 seconds of my life.

Raw Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Katie Lea

Katie won some tags to get here. Yeah whatever. Katie goes after the arm and this is just going nowhere. The fans are totally dead and there is just no point to this. Mickie uses a bunch of kicks because of her arm and this is just bad. Katie locks in an armbar but forgets to bend it the right way so it looks completely awful. And then Mickie uses the bad arm for the DDT and wins it. That somehow went on for seven minutes.

Rating: F. Oh this just failed. That’s all there is to it. Mickie’s selling was bad, the offense was bad, the ending was bad, the crowd was bad, are you getting that this was bad? Yeah moving on.

We get the results of the poll and it’s more or less a three way tie between Batista, Cena and both with neither getting 7% of the vote.

Recap of Edge vs. Batista. Edge won the title and got rid of Taker so Batista challenged him because Big Dave liked being in title matches. Batista goes to Raw after this so it’s his last shot.

World Heavyweight Championship: Edge vs. Batista

I have to use the proper names since both belts are on Smackdown at the moment. The champion comes out first again for some reason. That’s happened most of the night for some reason. JR tries to figure out what the R stands for in the Rated-R Superstar. Well no one ever accused JR of being up with the times. Batista gets a very solid pop. His pyro has to be heard to be believed.

Batista of course dominates to start us off as Edge is more or less trying to survive the opening part of the match. He busts out a Jackhammer and gets a small Goldberg chant. He’ll be fine as long as he doesn’t throw chops I guess. He then goes through the table to give Edge a chance. All of the papers sticking to his back is funny for some reason to me.

Edge keeps trying to make Batista miss including sending him into the middle turnbuckle. Ross informs us that the buckle isn’t covered in barbecue sauce. I hope he donates his brain to science. That would be interesting beyond belief to look at. The crowd pops like mad for a single punch from Batista. Edge busts out a neckbreaker which Batista gets caught with. Yeah I know: Edge using a wrestling move. In a cool looking move, Edge goes for Edge-O-Matic but Batista just throws his head forward and sends Edge flying. That was pure power and looked great.

Batista hits a clothesline that would have knocked Edge out cold back in 04. A Boss Man Slam gets two. I love that move. He follows it up with a GREAT spear. Instead of jumping on him his shoulder just popped into Edge’s ribs which makes it look and sound completely awesome. Batista Bomb is blocked into the Edgecution for two as this is getting good. How many times has Edge gotten kicked in the face when he goes for the spear?

Batista goes up and gets kicked in the face for his troubles. And here’s La Familia of course, Hawkins, Ryder and Vickie in this case. Batista leap frogs over a spear and hits the spinebuster but Vickie grabs the referee to tick off the crowd. Edge pulls the referee to the floor and pops him to try to get disqualified. Vickie wants another referee so here’s Chavo.

They’re going for Vickie as Vince here and it’s just not working. Batista throws her over the ropes onto La Familia and by that I mean LAUNCHES her in a great looking visual. There’s your reason to see this show: you get to see a pig fly. Well it was funny to me. A belt shot and a Chavo count ends it.

Rating: B-. Pretty decent match here but really nothing all that great. If you chop about five minutes off this then it’s a much better match. There was too much just killing time at the beginning and in the middle to make the ending work. The last five minutes were quite good but the first ten to twelve were just ok which holds this back. Still a good match though.

Batista takes forever to leave as they want this to be some big farewell match. That would work a lot better if this wasn’t a Raw and Smackdown show, meaning you’ll see him the next night.

Ad for the Great American Bash which is apparently about blowing up cars.

HHH says he’s going to do what he should have done at Mania. He’s going to put Cena over again?

We get the big match deal as this is apparently supposed to be as big as Foley winning the title, Hogan vs. Rock or Hogan vs. Andre. Well first of all Foley isn’t nearly as big as either of those. We see a ton of other moments like Eddie beating Brock, Shawn winning, Flair winning, Austin winning and then Cena vs. HHH II. I mean….really?

WWE Championship: HHH vs. John Cena

Cena gets mostly a face pop. Cole says if you aren’t excited about this then you should go home. Wouldn’t people hearing his voice be at home for the most of the time? Is he saying go back to live with your parents because it’ll make the world better? I hate when these shows get all preachy. We get big match intros and Cena is booed LOUDLY. Yeah HHH is the face here. Lillian sounds like she’s sneezing when she says H.

They even check the boots and tights. This really is a big match so they’re treating it like one. They feel each other out a lot to start and HHH hits a hip toss and throws in a crotch chop because DX is AWESOME right? They both show each other up and then are like screw this and start throwing bombs. Cena hits move #4 and gets two. He goes for the flying tackles and HHH uses that incredible mind and ducks to send Cena flying. I love basic counters like that.

The crowd seems a bit confused but they’re certainly interested in this. Cena takes FOREVER to set up You Can’t See Me and gets kicked in the chest for his efforts or lack thereof in this case. The standing around here is getting pretty stupid as they’re just waiting on moves to be done to them. The top rope Fameasser is more or less just a boot to the back of the head since HHH messed it up pretty badly.

STFU doesn’t hook but you know it’s coming. He takes too long AGAIN on You Can’t See Me and gets kneed in the face for his troubles. Pedigree doesn’t work and HHH is thrown to the floor where he hurts his knee. At least it’s not his quad. Cena acts a little heelish and goes for the knee. It’s smart strategy but because of the circumstances it’s making him the heel in this match. That my friends, is basic heel/face psychology.

He wraps HHH’s leg around the post as this is pretty solid stuff. They fight over the STFU which looks sloppy but cool at the same time. Pedigree hits out of nowhere but his knee is hurt so it’s only two. BIG pop for the kickout. FU hits for two also. HHH is selling the heck out of that knee. They slug it out with nothing but right hands and Cole has completely stopped talking for some reason. Ah there he is.

Cena hits the Protoplex and finally hits You Can’t See Me (yes I know that isn’t the proper name). It gets two of course, probably because it’s a stupud fist drop. STFU is locked WAY in as I’m pretty sure the knee isn’t supposed to go like that. HHH counters into a Crossface that looks like crap. In a cool counter, Cena stands up into the FU but it doesn’t hit. A Pedigree ends it.

Rating: B+. Solid match here but by no means as great a match as they would want us to believe. It felt like two guys trying to have a great match rather than a great match. That’s not the best wording but that’s how it came off. HHH should have won to even up the rivalry but they’re REALLY overhyping this. It’s good but it’s not that good.

One last thing: as HHH is posing, Lawler says he doesn’t want to be crass but they beat the heck out of each other. After everything else he’s said he’s worried about THAT?

Overall Rating: C+. Well this was in a way built around two matches and those were both good. Other than that though the show just didn’t do it for me. Too many of the matches were just there for the sake of having title matches and that’s never a good thing. The show is ok, but just ok. It got better the next year but the company as a whole was better than too. Check out the main event and that’s about it.

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