Smackdown
Date: March 1, 2013
Location: Chesapeake Energy Arena, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Josh Matthews, Michael Cole

This is another special edition of the show called Social Media Smackdown. In other words, the show is heavily themed around things like Twitter, Tout and whatever else is popular in that area of technology. I’m not entirely sure how we’re supposed to hear live from fans during a taped show, but I’m sure WWE has some “clever” idea in mind to solve this dilemma. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about Orton and Sheamus attacking the Shield on Monday in a surprise attack.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Damien Sandow

Non-title. On the way to the ring, Sandow complains about the poor sentence structure that the champion and Ricardo both use. He also doesn’t like the spit bucket that Ricardo carries for some reason. Sandow is only accomplished by his good looks and jealous gazes of the unwashed masses. Alberto makes fun of Damien’s breath and we’re ready to go. They fight over a lockup to start until Sandow gets a quick shoulder to knock Del Rio down.

The champion comes back with one of his own and Damien heads to the apron. Back in and Sandow hooks a headlock before stomping away in the corner. We get some tweets on the bottom of the screen to meet the social media requirement of the match. Some of the commentary is indeed new though as we hear Cole talk about some news stories from Friday.

Alberto comes back with a slam and a middle rope moonsault for two. Sandow hooks a chinlock to no avail as Del Rio comes back with la majistral (rolling cradle) for two. Damien is right back with a clothesline for a near fall of his own though as the fast pace continues. Sandow jumps into a kick to the ribs and gets backdropped out to the apron. An enziguri puts him on the floor and we take a break.

Back with Damien slamming Del Rio down and dropping the Wind-Up Elbow for two. Sandow drops some knees into the champion’s ribs and hooks a chinlock with his knee in the back. Del Rio fights up and hooks a German suplex to escape, putting both guys down. Back up and they slug it out until the Del Rio comes back with some clotheslines and a backbreaker. A low superkick gets two on Sandow as Swagger and Colter are watching in the back.

The cross armbreaker is countered into an Edge-O-Matic (reverse X-Factor) for two. Del Rio sends Sandow into the ropes and spins him around, allowing for some forearms to the back and a Backstabber for another near fall. Alberto loads up something in the corner but charges into a boot, followed by a running flip neckbreaker for two more for Sandow. He loads Del Rio into the Terminus but Alberto counters into the cross armbreaker for the submission at 9:42 shown of 13:12.

Rating: B. This was much better than I was expecting with both guys moving very quickly. The idea here was great with both guys getting to show off and look good in a match where they both benefit. Del Rio gets a win over someone who isn’t bad and Sandow gets to look good against the world champion. Above all else though: this is a fresh match. We haven’t seen these two fight, or at least not in awhile.

We get some clips from the masterpiece of Cena vs. Punk on Raw.

HELL NO is in the back and they talk about facing the Prime Time Players again tonight but with the handicaps from Raw reversed: tonight Kane is blindfolded and Bryan has an arm behind his back. Kane says fine but Bryan yells because Kane doesn’t know what it’s like to be blinded in a match. Kane is happy because he doesn’t have to look at Bryan’s ugly goat face during the match. Bryan says no a lot.

US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz

This is 2/3 falls and Miz is challenging. No jacket of flag for Cesaro this time. Miz grabs a fast rollup for two but Cesaro takes him to the mat with ease. He puts a headlock on Miz before running him over with a shoulder for two. Miz hits a back elbow of his own for one and kicks Cesaro in the face for two more. The champion heads to the floor for a breather but back inside Miz goes after the knee. Antonio heads to the floor again, only to get caught by a sunset flip back inside.

A knee to the ribs puts Miz down for two and it’s off to a chinlock. Miz fights up and hits a clothesline, only to charge into a kind of torture rack slam for two. Cool looking move by Cesaro there. A rollup gets two for Miz but Cesaro Neutralizes him for the first fall at 4:02. We take a break and come back with the score tied up. Apparently Miz won a fall with the Figure Four during a break. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that before. Miz charges into the gutwrench suplex for two and it’s back to the chinlock.

The challenger fights up and stars raining down left hands on Cesaro but the champion calls Miz a stupid American, earning himself a slap. The Reality Check (backbreaker into a neckbreaker) is countered and Cesaro throws Miz into the air for the European Uppercut for a very close two. Cesaro taunts Miz, only to have the weak knee taken out for two.

They slug it out from their knees with Miz taking over and pounding away on Cesaro in the corner. The running clothesline in the corner sets up the top rope double ax handle for no cover. Back to the knee and there’s the Figure Four but Antonio makes the rope. Miz tries the hold again but Cesaro kicks him off. A rollup out of the corner gets two for Miz but Cesaro reverses into one of his own, pulling the trunks for the pin at 10:04 shown of 13:34.

Rating: C+. Another decent match getting some length here and both guys got to look pretty good. It was annoying having the second fall on the WWE App but I guess we need to make sure we get it if we want to see the full match. Also they just didn’t have time for the wrestling stuff tonight because we need to TOUT STUFF later on in the show or something. Decent match here and hopefully this ends this feud, although odds are it won’t given the finish.

Orton and Sheamus are in the back and Shemaus wants Randy to worry about the Shield. Orton says he has to worry about Big Show tonight so Sheamus offers to watch his back. Randy actually takes him up on the offer.

Video on Fandango who debuts tonight.

Here’s good old JR to interview Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter. JR talks about how he recruited Swagger to wrestle when he was playing football at the University of Oklahoma. Swagger insults the Sooners and Colter says they gave JR this interview because he’s a real American. We get a clip from September when Swagger walked out on Raw. Colter answers for him, saying that he taught Swagger the truth about what happens in America everyday.

JR doesn’t understand so Colter talks about how WWE is a microcosm of what America is like. Colter thinks it’s interesting that Swagger could go on a losing streak and leave at the same time someone like Alberto Del Rio comes in and takes what should belong to Jack. Colter goes into his usual schtick about illegal immigrants taking jobs from Americans. Remarkably in one of the most conservative states in the country, no one seems to disagree. Colter says that Del Rio doesn’t share the same values that he and Swagger do, so Del Rio needs to leave the country. Zeb compares Del Rio to rotten fruit that should be trashed.

Colter talks about Swagger winning the title at Wrestlemania but JR suggests that Colter is brainwashing Swagger. Apparently whatever talking Swagger and JR had done in the past means nothing anymore and JR needs to be quiet before something bad happens to him. Swagger gets in JR’s face and shoves him into the corner while calling JR a sympathizer. This brings out Del Rio who stands between JR and Swagger before saying that Swagger and Colter are the problems before saying he’s the solution. That’s a very good line and it ends the segment.

Your choices to face Del Rio next week are Ziggler, Barrett and Cesaro. The winner will be announced later tonight.

HELL NO vs. Prime Time Players

Non-title, Kane is blindfolded and Bryan has an arm tied behind his back. After a break, Kane puts a hood on over his mask but it has a goat face on it. Funny stuff. Bryan has Kane start with Young so Darren has some fun. He tries to trip Kane up in a school boy but the masked man catches on. Darren: “IT DIDN’T WORK TITUS!” Kane catches up to Darren and slams him down before Bryan tags himself in. After some kicks to the chest, a one arm crucifix gets two on Young. It’s off to Titus and we take a break.

Back with Daniel escaping from Titus and bringing in Kane. The fans help Kane find Titus in the corner and there’s a hip toss by Kane, but he can’t find Titus again. Young comes in off a tag and walks into a chokeslam but Young rolls away from the cover. Bryan tags himself in but Kane grabs the referee by the throat. Bryan tries to call him off so Kane grabs Bryan with the other hand. Kane eventually feels the beard and lets Bryan go, but the distraction lets Titus roll Daniel up for the pin at 3:55 shown of 7:25.

Rating: D. I have no idea what the point of this was. Is it that Bryan and Kane fight a lot? That’s fine I guess, but they did this same idea on Raw on Monday. It certainly wasn’t to push the Players as the division has already died off again. It wasn’t for comedy because other than the goat face hood, nothing on here was funny.

Post match Kane sees the goat face on the hood and is ticked off. Of all the costumes he’s worn over the years, that’s the one that offends him? Bryan wants a hug but Kane puts the hood on him and smacks Bryan in the face.

Big Show says he’ll chokeslam Orton tonight.

Here’s Chris Jericho live via Skype where it’s the afternoon. He’s on tour with Fozzie and bands like Metallica and Anthrax and plugs the replay of Robot Combat League after Smackdown. That’s that apparently.

We meet Fandango in the back where he rubs his chest and criticizes Striker for his pronunciation of the name. We get some lessons in how to say Fandango before Striker asks him about his fighting style. Fandango says that he’s accomplished everything in the ballroom so now it’s time to take his rhythm and grace to the ring. Striker says Fandango’s debut is up next against what sounds like Zack Ryder, but Fandango says the debut isn’t happening until Striker gets his name right before walking off. Oh dear indeed.

We recap Lesnar returning to attack Vince and HHH returning to fight off Lesnar, busting him open in the process.

Del Rio faces Ziggler next week with over 50% of the vote.

Big Show vs. Randy Orton

During Orton’s entrance we get a clip from Raw of Orton and Sheamus distracting the Shield, allowing Orton to hit an RKO on Rollins. Orton avoids the chop in the corner to start and pounds away on the giant. Show knocks him back down and fires off a headbutt to stagger Orton. The big mane takes over and things slow down as he pounds away at Orton’s midsection. Show crushes him in the corner but gets dropkicked out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Big Show slamming elbows into Orton’s shoulder to keep him in trouble. Show hooks a short arm scissors but Randy fights up with some right hands. That gets him nowhere though as Big Show takes him right back down with the Final Cut for two. Show goes to the middle rope but his elbow from there hits the mat, allowing Orton to keep living.

Orton pounds away at the head and counters the chokeslam into a DDT for two. They head to the floor where Orton sends Big Show head first into the post to slow him down even more. Back in and Orton kicks Big Show in the jaw, allowing him to hit the Elevated DDT. Before he can follow up though, here comes the Shield. Big Show is still down so Orton is caught 3-1. Here’s Sheamus before Shield can get in the ring and it’s 3-2. The fans chant FEED ME MORE as the match is thrown out I’m guessing. For the time, we’ll say it was 7:00 shown of about 10:30.

Rating: C-. The match was pretty slow paced but it was jut there for the post match stuff. There’s nothing wrong with that at all and it allowed for Big Show to prove he hasn’t fallen far off the radar after losing the title. The Shield stuff is the important stuff though so let’s get to that already.

Orton and Sheamus get caught in the numbers game but Big Show gets back up and knocks Reigns out cold. Rollins and Ambrose don’t know what to think so they run away. This didn’t come off as a turn for Big Show but rather him fighting someone he perceived as an imminent threat. Big Show knocks Orton out with a punch so Sheamus Brogue Kicks him down.

Overall Rating: C+. The first 45 minute or so were really solid but then things started to taper off in a hurry. The social media stuff wound up meaning nothing although the version I watched which aired before it aired in America had slightly different commentary and didn’t include the JBL or Jericho interviews, the Call trailer or the Del Rio poll stuff. Still though, the social media stuff meant nothing at all for the most part. The show tonight was ok though and it looks like it set up a six man tag for Wrestlemania.

Results

Alberto Del Rio b. Damien Sandow – Cross armbreaker

Antonio Cesaro b. The Miz – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Prime Time Players b. HELL NO – Rollup to Bryan

Randy Orton vs. Big Show went to a no contest when Shield interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Living Dangerously 1998
Date: March 1, 1998
Location: Asbury Park Convention Center, Asbury Park, New Jersey
Attendance: 3,700
Commentator: Joey Styles

It’s been about four to five months since our last outing and only one thing has really changed: Al Snow. He’s risen to prominence now with the Head gimmick and he is having a match tonight with Kronus to showcase himself. Also Storm is feuding with Candido because Storm got thrown out of his spot as a Triple Threat prospect.

Also we have Taz vs. Bigelow for the TV Title in Bigelow’s home town. That could be good. The company has lost its pass now for being a young company since their last two PPVs have looked good and been decent, so it’s now a regular grade and not an ECW adjusted one. Let’s get to a show that I’d guess is named after Heyman’s alter ego. Let’s get to it.

We open with a shot from last night apparently of Taz walking into the empty arena and saying he’s ready. Isn’t that called breaking and entering? I think this is supposed to be based on Rocky but I’m not sure. Oh wait it’s from Philadelphia. Of course it’s a Rocky reference.

Joey opens the actual show and the arena looks really good. It’s well lit and looks very full, which makes me think there were like 8 people on the camera side. We get the intro video and song and we’re ready to go.

Jerry Lynn/Chris Chetti vs. F.B.I.

Chetti was the first graduate of the House of Hardcore, the ECW wrestling school, which I know because Joey says that Chris Chetti was the first graduate of the House of Hardcore, the ECW wrestling school. The F.B.I. are all dancing for some reason. This is Guido and Smothers in case you were wondering.

Lynn had little credibility at this point but he was getting more popular. Chetti is introduced as the first graduate of the House of Hardcore, the ECW wrestling school. The fans don’t like Smothers, like at all. Maybe Lynn has more credibility at this point than I thought. Ok the WOO for chops is getting annoying.

Lynn takes out both guys with a nice looking dive from the top. Rich accidentally nails Chetti. Wait what? That’s what Joey said but it makes no sense. That’s not something I usually have to say about him. He annoys me but to be fair he doesn’t make many huge mistakes. Also to be fair, another guy up there might catch his errors, which are understandable.

Chetti hooks a small package but Lynn messes up and has the referee. Again Chris gets the cover on a rollup but there’s no referee. Chetti gets a nice spot where he runs up the corner and comes back with a reverse leg lariat. That was pretty sweet. He finally gets the hot tag to Lynn who cleans house including a jumping back elbow which makes him awesome. Rick comes in with an Italian flag but the shot misses and hits Guido, giving Lynn a rollup for the win.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all. It was pretty fast paced and formula based so everything went fine there. It got the crowd into the show which is never a problem that this place has so that kind of makes these matches redundant. Even still, this was fine.

Joey says Wing Kanemura isn’t here so of course we get a video package anyway on him. He’s not here. Ok then.

Lance Wright, some jerk in a bad suit that says he works for Vince, says that tonight it’s Doug Furnas vs. Tanaka. This guy is really annoying.

Masato Tanaka vs. Doug Furnas

So I watched the whole match before I started writing about it and the only word to describe it is sloppy beyond all belief. I mean they botch a ton of stuff here and it’s not like they’re little spots. They botch BIG spots. Tanaka tries for a tornado DDT but it turns into them just falling all over each other.

I guess you can chalk some of this up to them having limited time to prepare, but at the same time these are pros and shouldn’t have to deal with things like this. The fans are booing the heck out of this match and I can’t say for a second that I blame them. It’s just amateurish looking to say the least.

A botch here and there is one thing but this is awful. Tanaka ends this nightmare with a roaring elbow. Ok so it wasn’t all botches but still there were FAR too many in here to be acceptable. Post match Wright talks about WWF higher ups and Furnas nails him before putting on an ECW shirt, and I’m assuming defecting or something like that.

Rating: D. The botches just killed it and in a match that doesn’t even go for six minutes that just sucked the life out of this one for me. This just wasn’t worth a PPV time slot but again to be fair they didn’t know that this would be the match. They at least realized the match sucked and ended it before it got out of hand.

Ad for the Hardcore Hotline. Also, you can get a FREE merchandise catalogue. That’s actually smart. Wrestlepalooza, which might be the best name ever, is in two months which is the shortest layoff yet so that’s a good sign.

We can’t air Sandman vs. Sabu because it’s graphic. Keep that in mind.

Nicole Bass, an annoying chick that thought she was a hot Chyna and Jason, an annoying guy, show up and demand that we see a tape. It’s of Dreamer showing up without Beaulah. Yeah that’s it. Tommy has his dog with him. That’s just cool for some reason.

Rob Van Dam vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

Van Dam is still a huge heel here but it’s lightening up a lot. Scorpio is over as free beer in a frat house. He’s Flash Funk at this point but here he’s just the simple 2 Cold Scorpio and therefore much better than he was in WWF. The more I hear the more I think Van Dam is already a face. They start with a long feeling out process which is fine as they do some decent technical stuff.

However, we of course get a botch because it’s ECW. Those things just suck the life out of a lot of matches. I understand that they are going to happen and at least here they covered it up a bit. In the previous match they just assumed no one noticed and thought it would be fine. That’s just freaking dumb. We get a very nice reversal sequence with a lot of monkey flips that ends with a standoff.

Very nice indeed. We hit the floor and Van Dam is in the crowd. Well you knew it was going to happen sooner or later I guess. I think they’re going for the big epic match here but the fans aren’t all happy with it which can’t be a good sign. To be fair though, most of the time not all fans are going to love the thing. The fans want Sandman apparently. That sums up ECW crowds pretty well.

We’re given a high flying technically mostly sound match, and the fans want weapons and blood and tables. So many times these fans were just ridiculous and stupid and this is one of them. Scorpio hits a SWEET moonsault. The Five Star which isn’t called that yet gets knees or what are called knees I suppose as it looked like it hit pretty well to me. We hit the ramp for awhile and the Van Daminator is more or less no sold. Hint for how to counter: HIT HIM WITH THE CHAIR. Seriously dude, use some freaking intelligence.

A piledriver on the ramp and Van Dam is hurt. And there goes the referee because in a no DQ match we need a referee for…? Van Dam tries to steal the 450 and would have missed completely anyway. Scorpio mostly hits the 450 and here’s Sabu to up the workrate. An Arabian Facebuster gets two. Sandman comes out to chase off Sabu. Van Dam gets a SWEET jumping rollup for the pin. Post match Van Dam acts very cocky and offers a handshake but Scorpio nails him to a big pop.

Sabu comes back with a table so they try to put Scorpio through it. Naturally this doesn’t work as Sandman makes the save. In a stupid moment, as Scorpio is laying on it and Sandman makes the save, he pops up as soon as Sandman is here. Yeah that didn’t look dumb at all. Sandman tries a hurricanrana from the top through the table on Sabu. Guess what happens. Go ahead and guess. Anyway, the two faces share a beer after the match. Sandman dances. This is disturbing.

Rating: B-. This was good, but it suffers from the same problem that it always does: Paul Heyman overbooking it. Can ANYONE explain to me why Sabu and Sandman had to come in there? I know RVD and Sabu are partners, but he had no business coming to ringside at all.

The match was rather good until they went to the floor and it became just another brawl. Why is wrestling so hard to do when you have two guys that are really good at it? I get that it’s a hardcore company, but at the end of the day it’s a wrestling company and should be about wrestling.

Ok so see if you can follow this one. That’s not me talking, that’s how Heyman starts the next video package. Are you freaking kidding me? The idea is that Storm was a Triple Threat (top heel stable) prospect and won the tag titles with Candido who was in Triple Threat.

Sunny showed up and got Candido to go insane and beat up Storm so they’re still champions but hate each other. I didn’t know Russo worked for ECW. Tonight there’s a tag match where they’re on other sides and both get to pick partners. The winners get nothing at all. They would hold the titles another THREE MONTHS before losing them. You think that’s long enough?

Dudley Boys vs. New Jack/Spike Dudley vs. Hardcore Chair Swingin Freaks

It’s elimination rules of course. Gertner’s intro is hilarious for Big Dick Dudley: “The man who last night took such liberties with YOUR mother that he is now legally your father in 17 states.” That is just awesome. About himself: “More tongue in cheek than a lesbian orgy” and “Joel, your girlfriend has me on speed dial because she loves the way I star 69 her, Gertner.” This guy is awesome.

He follows that up with “Currently getting jiggy with it to my left,” seriously, sign this guy now. The intro takes like 8 minutes but it’s hilarious. Balls and Axl come out and the brawl is on early. And after some ok stuff here’s New Jack with his weapons to screw the whole thing up. Oh dang it we have to listen to the freaking song again don’t we. Yep we do.

The music really throws things off as it keeps making me think that something important is happening or that the team who came out to it are winning. And yep it’s all weapons now. Spike keeps jumping all over the place because that’s the only thing he can do to make sense here. And now all six go into the crowd. Ok then. We’re at the merchandise stand now and Spike and New Jack dive like 15 feet to the floor through tables through the Dudleys.

Ok, when Mankind did it, it was cool. This was just mindless violence being substituted for wrestling. Keep in mind that ten minutes into this match the sang song is still playing. An Acid Drop through a table gets two for Spike as Bubba saves it since they want to eliminate Balls and Axl. And a 3D does just that. Twin guitar shots and an Acid Drop and a chair from the top ends this mess.

Rating: D. I hate these things. They’re just complete garbage and more than anything else, I hate that song. Why is this considered interesting or good or anything like that? Anyway, this was just like every other one of these that they did as in it was completely pointless and mindless crap.

We get a big long package about Justin Credible who was pushed to the freaking moon for years. The problem: the fans didn’t care or buy it. Why didn’t they? Simply put: he wasn’t any good. He was average as can be and that’s it.

Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

Jenna Jameson is the new reporter. Justin Credible comes out and says he has Beaulah so who needs Jenna. I would agree actually. Nicole Bass and Jason are with him and I honestly thought Bass was a man at first. Jenna tries to act tough and it just fails. Dreamer comes out and I have to hear her consistently say Tommy I love you (for those of you that don’t know, that’s my first name).

He kisses her and Joey says Dreamer goes where every man has gone before which made me laugh. Dreamer actually hits a plancha as we have a priest in the front row and we keep hearing about how Justin crossed a line. That amuses me to no end. And hey, what a shock, it’s a brawl. AGAIN Joey talks about the Sandman vs. Sabu match that we can’t show. Let it be made clear: WE CANNOT SHOW IT.

Yeah just remember that. Dreamer hits a running dropkick to the chair while Justin is in the Tree of Woe. We get kind of a Raven spot as Dreamer gets hit with a drop toehold into a chair. Ok, Justin doesn’t deserve to be WOOED on chops. Neither does Tommy to be fair. They use a chair for about ten spots in a row because that just makes things better or whatever. Dreamer hits a DEATH VALLEY Driver (screw that Spicolli nonsense. He was a drug addict and died after taking too many drugs.

He’s not some saint that deserves to be canonized. Let it go already.) which Justin no sells. The spinning, which adds nothing to it that I can see, tombstone hits and here’s Beaulah. She hits Justin low and does the same to Jason before DDTing him. Nicole puts her in a bearhug which she manages to botch.

Bass falls out of her top as Mikey Whipwreck, who feuded with Justin but has no bearing here comes in for the save. He has a bad leg and Justin breaks a crutch over his cast before Dreamer hits a DDT for the pin.

Rating: D+. What was the point of this again? I forgot with all the chair shots and nonsense going on. This was just more mindless fighting that nothing actually came from. I’m not huge on that as it just was stupid. And I like Tommy.

We get the same ad from earlier for the catalogue and PPV which apparently wasn’t supposed to air then.

Now we get what was supposed to air: Bigelow vs. Taz which was because Bigelow was getting beaten up by Triple Threat so he asked Taz to be his partner to fight them. Taz gets a great line: “I’m not gonna be your partner. I’m gonna be your savior.”

Keep in mind that was in his shouting voice. After Taz beats up Shane and says he wants to be world champion (the match didn’t happen for almost another year) Bigelow jumps him and reveals it was all a setup to stop Taz. That makes sense I guess.

TV Title: Taz vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Remember that Bigelow is the hometown boy. I love how they announce Bigelow’s weight and Joey says a different one during the match. That always amuses me for some reason. Bigelow hits a great powerbomb. He was always great at that move. Shame Diesel was using it in WWF so Bigelow couldn’t do it. This is a long brawl but there’s some wrestling in there to balance it out I guess.

They hit the crowd for awhile and actually Taz gets some solid cheers. And then Bigelow gets suplexed off the ramp and to the floor and both nearly die. Because that’s clearly the big ratings draw here right? We go back to the ring and Bigelow uses power stuff which Taz gets to suplex his way out of. See, THAT is how Taz looks good: when it’s Shane or some small guy that he’s throwing around it just gets repetitive.

The suplexes are leverage moves and now he’s getting to show what he can do with that leverage, making it seem far more important. The tables are brought in as we just have to have those because the wrestling here clearly isn’t good enough. We brawl on the floor AGAIN as I grow to hate Heyman even more. It’s ok to just wrestle in the ring guys. The fans are really restless here as they were popping like cherries for the wrestling stuff.

Case in point: Taz takes a sign to the head, fans are dead/booing. They trade punches, crowd cheers. See? It’s not hard to just have wrestling. Tazmission is locked in and Bigelow drops him through the ring. They climb out and Bigelow pulls Taz up for the easy pin. It looked cool and the fans all freaked out over it, but Bigelow couldn’t win with his shoulder piledriver to give us a standard ending? I hate that.

Rating: D+. The brawling was just too much here. This match wanted so badly to be good but the brawling and the tables and the over the top nature of it just killed the thing. Paul just refused to accept the idea of two good wrestlers just getting out there and wrestling and that’s what wound up killing him off in the end. Sometimes the fans just want wrestling and while Paul tried to do that, he went too far most of the time and it killed things.

Heyman runs up and says the Kronus vs. Snow is cancelled and we’re going to see Sandman vs. Sabu from before the PPV, the PPV that the censors said WE CANNOT SEE. Ok, a few questions here. Number one, there was more adult stuff on PPV yet this is inappropriate? Number two, if this is such a hot feud, which it was I guess, why not have this on the PPV?

If they were upset that it couldn’t be shown, why would you film it and not air it? Everything else is live, so why wasn’t this? I get in something like UFC where they have the prelim fights taped in case something goes like 10 seconds. That makes sense as it’s a legit concern and if something like that does happen, they have something that they can plug in and give the fans a legit PPV.

However, you wouldn’t put St. Pierre in a prelim match that MIGHT make air. This whole thing with Joey constantly saying we can’t air it but there just happens to be full commentary for it anyway makes me shake my head. I guess if you think about it enough it could make sense, but you shouldn’t have to think that hard about it which is the point.

Sabu vs. Sandman

This is dueling canes. Sabu hits the ring second and gives him some fairly weak cane shots. And as Sandman takes over…Sabu runs in for the save? The first guy is RVD in disguise. That’s actually brilliant. Alfonso sends Van Dam to the back despite them destroying Sandman. That makes sense right? Anyway, this is your standard weapons/garbage match because neither can work more than two minutes without them.

Wait, where are the canes? I see no canes. Oh that’s right. It’s freaking ECW, meaning there’s no logic at all. It’s just Sabu beating up Sandman for about 10 minutes before Van Dam comes out to help him. There’s just nothing to talk about here at all as it’s terrible. Sabu beats up Sandman some more and the crooked ref of the week comes out to count the pin. This was awful.

Rating: F. What was the point of the canes match or whatever? What was the point of any of this actually? I just don’t get the point here at all as it wasn’t any good and it was just more mindless brawling which seems to be the theme for the show.

Back in the arena, everyone has Styrofoam Heads. Styles yells at Heyman for showing the match that the censors wanted to keep off the air. Apparently they didn’t fix the ring but the main event is happening anyway. Styles says he quits if this happens again with Paul. It’s convincing if you don’t think about it I guess.

Chris Candido/Shane Douglas vs. Lance Storm/???

Two guesses as to who Storm’s partner is given the heads out there. And the partner is Sunny, and you can see the screwjob from here. Storm and Candido do their usual thing which means its cool. Sunny comes in and we don’t have the catfight with Francine. OF COURSE Sunny makes the swerve that no one bought. The fans chant that they want Head.

For some reason they give Storm a mic while he’s in a camel clutch and as Candido asks what he’s going to give him, Storm says he’s going to give him head. And yep, Snow comes out. However, for no reason at all, they keep spinning the camera upside down at random intervals. It’s REALLY confusing and annoying. So after about a three minute brawl with Snow’s music playing and Shane falling through the hole in the ring, Snow gets the pin with a Snow Plow. The celebration ends the show.

Rating: N/A. This was way too short and way too over the top to grade. With the camera spinning and the lights going out I couldn’t really keep track of it. Seriously though, this was the main event: a four minute brawl that ends with a quick pin. That sums up everything to me.

Overall Rating: D. There was one title match and a 4 minute main event. How in the world does this validate a PPV show? This show had the skeleton of a good show there, but it just failed to deliver one. To be fair though, I think it’s because of Heyman more than anything else.

He just can’t let things stay the way they should be and it’s killing him. There just doesn’t need to be a chair or a big angle all the time and it weakened the show badly here. I wanted to like this show but I just couldn’t do it. They tried but they were running with an anchor. Only for ECW fans.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

NXT
Date: February 29, 2012
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Commentators: Josh Matthews, William Regal

It’s the one year anniversary show, despite the season not being on the air for a year yet but again, counting is probably too complicated for WWE. Striker has promised us a major announcement tonight which probably won’t wind up meaning much of anything because this is NXT, the land of crushed and broken dreams. Let’s get to it.

Alex Riley/Percy Watson vs. Darren Young/Titus O’Neil

Titus starts with Riley and the beating begins. Riley gets in a dropkick and it’s off to Young. Alex takes him down but goes up and is kicked down to give Young the advantage. Things slow down a lot with Titus taking over and saying that he has five. Riley tries to dive for a tag but Titus carries him back to the corner to bring in Young again.

Atomic drop gets two and it’s off to a chinlock with a body scissors. Riley manages to get a kick into the face of a bent over Young and tags in Watson. Watson speeds things up and hits the Heisman Splash for two. Watson goes after Titus though and walks into the double knee gutbuster from Young for the pin at 5:46.

Rating: D+. Technically this was fine but this feud has been going on forever. While they’ve done a good job of having it evolve over the months with logical step after logical step, it’s still not an interesting feud. Again, this would be so much better if they had something to fight for other than just pride.

Titus says Percy gets his rematch next week.

Back from a break and we have Alicia, Kaitlyn and Justin Gabriel in the ring in chairs. It’s supposed to be Bateman vs. Slater at this point. Apparently this is an intervention. Oh dear. They’re intervening about 5’5 of pure evil. Bateman: “You mean Trent Barretta?” They talk about how crazy Maxine is and how she beats up random rew members and makes everyone miserable. Kaitlyn set this up. This is being booed out of the building.

We get a highlight package of Maxine and Bateman’s relationship, including the whole engagement and the Johnny Curtis stuff. Bateman says she’s a lot better at home and he doesn’t want to die alone. Kaitlyn says that constantly getting slapped in the face is weird, not love. He asks Kaitlyn what love is then, so she bends him back and kisses him. Maxine runs out and gets in a fight with Kaitlyn which is quickly broken up. Maxine beats on Bateman and the girls are in the main event tonight.

Tyson and Natalya run into each other in the back. McGillicutty comes up and says something smells around here but it’s not Natalya. They’re up next.

Michael McGillicutty vs. Tyson Kidd

They go tot he mat and Michael controls with a quick headlock. Regal talks about Tiger Mask as Tyson hooks a hammerlock. Michael works on the wrist but Kidd reverses into a cradle for two. McGillicutty sends him into the corner and out to the floor for the first big advantage. Off to a chinlock with McGillicutty having a way too excited look on his face. Back up and Kidd gets up a boot in the corner and they clothesline each other.

Kidd starts firing off some hard strikes and a jumping spin kick gets two. Rolling cradle gets two. Kidd goes up but gets crotched. He knocks McGillicutty off and hits a moonsault press for two. Kidd loads up the Sharpshooter but McGillicutty kicks him away and the McGillicutter gets the pin at 6:22. McGillicutty’s face looks like it belongs in a Will Ferrell movie.

Rating: C. Why did that just happen? They’ve been pushing Kidd very strong the last few weeks and now he loses clean to Michael McGillicutty? For what? Was Kidd getting too over or something? I really don’t get this, especially after the last few weeks where they’ve had Kidd being Bret-esque with the Sharpshooter combinations. Then again it’s NXT so it’s not like anyone is paying attention.

Raw ReBound is about Rock and Cena of course.

Maxine is freaking out in the back and runs into Aksana. Maxine says everyone is plotting against her and she thinks even Aksana is in on it. Anyone that crosses Maxine will regret it.

Striker is in the ring for his major announcement, drawing a Regal chant. He talks about all the ring announcers and commentators and the thirty new superstars they’ve added. He does know that NXT has been around two years and that this season has been a year right? However there’s only been one host. He’s got this job because he loves this stuff. NXT was supposed to be about exposing the unseen because the guys in that locker room are carrying the business into the future. Yep the business is dead.

Anyway, lately NXT has been missing its point and that’s because of Striker. Tonight that changes….and here are Hawkins and Reks to interrupt. They have a surprise for Striker and they pull out chairs and drinks because they want to see this. Striker finally yells at Curt to shut up. He tells Hawkins to come try him if he wants to. Someone with veteran experience needs to take over. Someone that has worked his entire career so that Curt Hawkins and Tyler Reks can be called wrestlers. Striker will still be host but the matchmaker is now Sir William Regal.

Regal gets in the ring and says that there are going to be some new people coming to NXT to face Hawkins and Reks. As for them, why are they wearing sunglasses inside? This is the beginning of the new NXT and their first surprise is next week.

Kaitlyn vs. Maxine

Bateman and Curtis are on commentary for this. Curtis rubs lotion on his chest. He says that Maxine is in his back pocket for whenever he wants to pull her out. Brawl to start and Regal says he’s very open to bribes. Kaitlyn books a body scissors for a bit but Maxine takes over with basic stuff. A running double ax gets two. Maxine beats on her a little more until Kaitlyn hits a Bubba Bomb and a rollup for the pin at 3:21.

Rating: D. As usual this was boring. These girls hate each other but always have coherent wrestling matches instead of wild brawls. That’s one of those wrestling things I’ve never quite gotten. Anyway, dull match and the ending came out of nowhere. It is nice to see something other than a mat slam of some sort for a new finisher though.

Maxine gets in Regal’s face and says she looks forward to working closely with him.

Overall Rating: C-. I wasn’t all that thrilled with this show but it wasn’t terrible. Regal taking over could be a good thing but if he just does the same things Striker did, this isn’t going anywhere. I’ve been saying it for months but this show is desperately in need of some fresh blood or at least some fresh faces. Also, end the whole Bateman/Curtis/Maxine stuff. It’s been going on for months now and it’s still going around in circles. Not a bad show tonight but this glimmer of hope needs to go somewhere.

Results
Darren Young/Titus O’Neil b. Alex Riley/Percy Watson – Double Knee Gutbuster To Watson
Michael McGillicutty b. Tyson Kidd – McGillicutter
Kaitlyn b. Maxine – Bubba Bomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 28, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz, Todd Keneley

We’re back in Orlando for a few weeks before we head to Chicago and start the full time on the road schedule. The main story here is once again the Hogans, as they were attacked by Aces and 8’s last week. This happens quite often on Impact and presumably will lead to a big swerve at Lockdown. Other than that we’re inching closer to the Alamodome and Lockdown so the card will start being fleshed out soon. Also Jeff Hardy is back tonight. Let’s get to it.

After the usual recap intro, Brooke and Bully say there’s no update on Hulk other than he’s healing.

Here’s Bully top open the show. He talks about how Aces and 8’s have been going crazy all over TNA for over a year (it’s been about 8 months) but last week they hurt Hulk Hogan. That was going too far, and now Ray want’s D-Von. First though, he brings out Jeff Hardy, his opponent ant Lockdown. Hardy is back and still has both belts.

Ray talks about their history together but says he doesn’t feel right about this. He doesn’t want a shot at Jeff because he’s Hulk’s son in law. There are a lot of guys who are better choices like the people in those matches Hulk set up. Jeff says he’s glad Hulk chose Bully because of all the history they have with tables, ladders and chairs. Now they’re taking it to the cage for the world title.

This brings out Daniels and Kazarian. They understand why Ray is getting the shot. It’s the same reason Ray got Brooke: someone has to rub lotion on Brooke’s back and tweet photos of her (both things Hulk has done). Daniels blames an allergic reaction for his loss last week and tells the two of them to get out of his ring. Ray steals the appletini and spits it back into the glass before throwing it in Daniels’ face. The brawl is on and Bad Influence is thrown to the floor. A tag match is made for later tonight.

Tonight Gut Check is back and we find out the members of the teams for Lethal Lockdown.

Sting is with Magnus in the back with the Brit saying he should be on the Lethal Lockdown team because of all the times Sting has been there for him.

Knockouts Title: Velvet Sky vs. Tara

Gail Kim is on commentary and Velvet is defending. Tara jumps her to start as Gail talks about a conspiracy to keep the belt on Sky because she’s a blonde. Velvet comes back with some clotheslines and a spinning headscissors but Jesse trips her up. A spear gets two on Velvet but Jesse interferes again. Referee Taryn Terrell throws him out and it’s In Yo Face for the pin on Tara at 2:05.

Aries is on the phone with Roode and talks about how there’s a three way tag match at Lockdown with the two of them defending against Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez and Bad Influence. Chavo and Hernandez pop in and it’s Aries vs. Hernandez later.

Kenny King is in the back and says he knows where he’s going from here. He walks into RVD’s locker room and says he’s better than champion Van Dam. Rob asks how many times he has to beat King and offers him one last shot, but if King loses he’s out of the X-Division.

Austin Aries vs. Hernandez

It’s power vs. speed here with the power taking over, as Aries is thrown around and knocked up and over the top rope to the floor. SuperMex loads up a big dive but charges into a shoulder to the ribs. A sunset flip doesn’t work but Aries manages to send him to the floor for the suicide dive. There’s a big ax handle off the top to the floor but as they head back inside, Hernandez powers Aries down again.

A slingshot shoulder puts him down again but Austin escapes the Border Toss. Aries hits a discus forearm, only to be knocked out to the floor with another shoulder. He tries to leave but Hernandez pulls him back in. They fight over a title belt but as it’s being taken away by the referee, Aries pulls out a chain and blasts Hernandez in the head for the pin at 4:30.

Rating: C. Not a terrible match here actually despite Hernandez being just another agile power guy. The match didn’t go anywhere due to how short it was, but at least Hernandez didn’t maim anyone in the process. I have almost zero interest in the tag title match at Lockdown, but that’s par for the course anymore.

Joseph Park tries to get on Team TNA but Sting sees Matt Morgan and asks him to be on the team. Morgan says no because Hogan should have asked him earlier.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Kenny King

Van Dam is defending and this is King’s last chance to win the title. King takes him down with a quick headlock but Rob comes back with a sick German suplex for two. They quickly head to the floor with Van Dam hitting the spinning kick to King’s back against the railing. We take a break and come back with King hitting a suplex in the ring before pounding away at Van Dam for two.

Van Dam takes King down by the legs but King rolls through a monkey flip out of the corner. Rob kicks him in the face and adds Rolling Thunder but the champion tries the 450 instead of the Frog Splash. The pin is all messed up as the pin hits but it’s not clear if the shoulder was up or not. I’m guessing it was a botch because King tries the Royal Flush (reverse F5, which he can barely get Rob up for) for the pin and the title at 9:10.

Rating: D. So not only was the finish badly botched and the redone finished botched as well, but it’s the same stupid idea of a guy loses four or five times but wins the final match and that’s supposed to make up for it. Wrestling doesn’t work that way, especially when King wins because Van Dam screwed up, not because of something King did well. Bad match and stupid booking, again.

We see the end of last week’s show with Hulk having been attacked by Aces and 8’s, allowing them to beat Ray and Sting. We get a picture of Hogan’s recently operated on knee.

Speaking of the bikers, here they are with something to say. D-Von talks about how Sting is drinking the Kool-Aid from Hogan, because Aces and 8’s gets to dominate in 2013. All Sting is responsible for is a bunch of shattered dreams. This brings out Sting who announces his first teammate as Samoa Joe. No shock there. Sting is sorry for the next teammate, but the teammate is sorry about D-Von’s luck, because it’s James Storm. Number four is Magnus and the final member is……Eric Young. The brawl is on and the bikers are cleared out.

We get a look at Ivelise Valez who is in Gut Check tonight. I believe she was on Tough Enough as well. She talks about training in MMA and having to sacrifice her relationship with her mother to be in wrestling.

Back from a break and Angle is happy.

We look at Lei’d Tapa who is the nephew of the Barbarian of wrestling fame. Tapa cries because her uncle is proud of her. She wants to get people to care about her.

Gut Check: Ivelise Valez vs. Lei’d Tapa

Tapa shoves her around to start but Valez graps a quick guillotine choke, only to get shoved off by the far bigger girl. Valez counters something out of a fireman’s carry into a choke. Some kicks to Tapa’s legs slow her down but Valez walks into a superkick to put her down. Tapa headbutts her down and doesn’t seem to know what to do from here. Valez nicely avoids a charge in the corner and hits a quick DDT to put Tapa down. A very nice hurricanrana puts Tapa down but the far bigger Tapa comes back with a Samoan Drop for two. Valez puts on another guillotine and gets the submission at 4:15.

Rating: C. In short, Ivelise good, Tapa not that good. Tapa looked like she didn’t know what to do half the time while Valez was looking crisp more often than not out there. This was a solid little match and it would be nice to have some fresh blood in the division, which is what Valez would bring. Good stuff.

Austin Aries tells Hardy he’s pulling for him at Lockdown.

We get a video on where AJ Styles has been for the last few months. AJ’s wife talks about how they met in high school and how great Styles has been over the years. They say he’s changed a lot over the years and how he’s been a different kind of dad in the last year. The wife walks out on the interview. AJ pops up, sporting a beard and says the cameramen don’t get it. He walks out and rides away on his motorcycle.

We recap the problems between the Rob’s over the last few weeks.

Here’s Robbie E in the ring and he has to admit that there’s a bigger and better bro and his name is Rob Terry. E asks Big Rob to come to the ring and opens the ropes for him like Terry usually does. Robbie says last week when he slapped Terry in the face, he crossed a line. He offers one last Bro Off for old times’ sake. E goes first and goes a bit nuts with the dancing but says he’ll step aside for the Bro Off champion to do his thing. As Big Rob starts dancing, Robbie E comes in and breaks a poster of some kind over his head. Big Rob stands up and gets very mad, causing E to run away.

Kurt Angle is looking for Aces and 8’s.

Bad Influence vs. Jeff Hardy/Bully Ray

Daniels and Ray start with Ray taking Daniels down with a clothesline. Ray hits a VERY loud chop and a second that isn’t as loud. Kaz comes in and talks into a backdrop but it allows Daniels to forearm Ray down. Back to Kaz for a double suplex onto Ray but the evil team dances Gangnam Style, allowing Ray to clothesline them both down. Ray dances a bit in a disturbing sight, allowing Hardy to come in for the reverse 3D as we take a break.

Back with Ray and Hardy double teaming Kaz with a corner splash and Poetry in Motion in the corner. Daniels misses a charge and his his partner, allowing for Ray to splash him as well, but Kaz breaks up Poetry in Motion. Daniels vs. Hardy now with Daniels sending the champion into the corner and then into the boot of Kazarian. Jeff gets beaten down for a few moments but comes back with a Whisper in the Wind to put Daniels down.

Hot tag brings in Ray who cleans house on Daniels. A Rock Bottom gets two on Daniels and he launches Kaz off the top. Ray suplexes Daniels down but Kaz breaks up the Swanton. An STO gets two on Jeff and everything breaks down. The thrown together team comes back though and it’s an electric chair from Bully into a Swanton from Jeff for the pin on Daniels at 11:10.

Rating: C. Just a main event tag match here which wasn’t all that great. I’m not wild on sacrificing a team getting a title shot in ten days to a thrown together team for the sake of building another match but it’s par for the course in wrestling anymore. Not much to see here but it was fine for what it was supposed to be.

Post match Angle goes into the Aces and 8’s clubhouse to beat down Brisco.  He finds the last masked man and takes him out before unmasking him.  Angle sees who it is and freaks out, shouting HOW COULD YOU.  Aces and 8’s come in and beat Angle down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a decent show overall, primarily because the Hogans were kept in check. It gets really boring seeing and hearing them every five minutes, so seeing and hearing Sting every five minutes was a nice change of pace. Having Young and Magnus on the Lockdown team makes sense as they have history with the bikers and now they get their chance at revenge. I’m still not thrilled by the story, but it’s nice to see a logical match that could go either way. It’s also nice to get some AJ progression. Not a bad show at all this week.

Results

Velvet Sky b. Tara – In Yo Face

Austin Aries b. Hernandez – Pin after a chain shot to the head

Kenny King b. Rob Van Dam – Royal Flush

Ivelise Valez b. Lei’d Tapa – Guillotine Choke

Jeff Hardy/Bully Ray b. Bad Influence – Swanton to Daniels.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

NXT
Date: February 27, 2013
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: William Regal, Tony Dawson

Back for another week here and we now have a new challenger for Langston in the form of Corey Graves. This is a good idea as Graves never got to have his title match due to the Shield interfering the first time. Other than that the main focus has actually been on the Divas division which works far better here than it does in WWE. Let’s get to it.

We open with Bo Dallas in the back with Dusty Rhodes, the NXT GM. Corey Graves comes in, carrying the NXT Title belt that he stole last week. Dusty talks about earning things, like Bo earned his spot in the Royal Rumble by winning a tournament. Tonight it’s Graves vs. Dallas vs. Conor O’Brian for the #1 contender’s spot.

Opening sequence.

Justin Gabriel vs. Leo Kruger

Justin has Tyson Kidd with him and this is fallout from last week where Kruger tried to attack the injured Kidd, only to have Gabriel make the save. We hear a brief history of the two guys as they were both trained in South Africa. Gabriel avoids a shot in the corner and chops away at Kruger’s chest before they circle each other some more. Another chop staggers Leo and we head to the mat with Justin holding a headlock.

This hold stays on for a good while as two minutes later it’s finally broken up. Gabriel comes right back with an arm trap headscissors for a bit before it’s right back to the headlock. Now it’s Kruger with his own headlock but Justin comes back with a headscissors to send Leo to the outside. We take a break and come back with Leo running over Justin with a shoulder block. A spinebuster puts Justin down for two before Kruger sends him shoulder first into the post for two.

Leo cranks on the arm for a bit before Justin fights back via kicks to the chest. A DDT on the arm puts Justin right back down for two and it’s back to the arm. Back to the armbar for a few minutes until Gabriel escapes via a snapmare. A nice series of kicks takes Kruger down as does a discus forearm. Gabriel hits a splash in the corner followed by a springboard cross body for two.

Justin goes up again, only to have Kruger knock him off the top and snap the bad arm down over the top rope. A BIG running clothesline takes Justin’s head off but somehow only gets two. Leo tries a superplex, only to be countered into a sunset bomb off the top. The 450 finally hits (with Gabriel selling the arm even while covering) for the pin on Kruger at 11:03 shown of 13:33.

Rating: B-. This was a very entertaining match that came out of almost nowhere. They were going back and forth the entire time and the arm stuff was a nice touch. It loses some significant points because of how long they spent in that headlock, but other than that I have very few complaints here. This was one of the better matches I’ve seen in a long time on NXT.

Post match Kruger hits Gabriel with Kidd’s crutch.

Aksana vs. Emma

Emma dances (badly) to the ring and tries to skin the cat to get into the ring but can’t quite get over the ropes. Aksana whips her into the corner to start and crawls over to Emma, only to have the Aussie (Emma) head to the apron. She kicks the ropes and seems to trip down to the floor. So is she a klutz?

Back in and a hair drag puts Aksana down so Emma can mock the crawling thing that Aksana does. Aksana comes back with a slam and drops an elbow for two. Emma pulls her down by the hair again and puts on a cravate for good measure. Aksana counters what appears to be a dancing suplex and hits a spinebuster for the pin at 4:39.

Rating: D+. What does it say for your career when you’re jobbing to Aksana? This was a step up for Aksana but she’s still not very good. Emma has only been around a few times on NXT and the dancing bit is only going to carry her so far, especially given how many other dancing characters there are in WWE at this time.

We cut to the back where Bo Dallas is unconscious.

Corey Graves vs. Conor O’Brian

There’s no Dallas in sight at the moment so I guess this is one on one now. The winner gets a shot at Langston. Graves goes for a leg to start and is easily shoved away. Another attempt gets the same result before O’Brian runs him over a few times with some hard shoulders. Off to a headlock on the mat by Conor which shifts into a nerve hold. We take a break and come back with Graves being backdropped over the top and out to the floor.

Back in and O’Brian keeps up the punishment as he stops a comeback attempt cold. Graves is sent to the floor and gets a breather, allowing him to wrap Conor’s leg around the post a few times. Back inside and Corey cranks on the leg with a leg lock before cannonballing down onto it. Off to another leg lock which transitions into a kind of modified Texas Cloverleaf, only with Graves laying on his side and cranking back on the legs instead of sitting on the back.

We take another break and come back with both guys on the floor again. Graves punches away at the limping O’Brian before getting two back inside. Back to another leg lock but O’Brian rips at his face to break the hold. They slug it out with O’Brian taking over and hitting a flapjack….and there go the lights. The lights come back on and the Shield is here for a no contest at approximately 9:30 shown of 14:30.

Rating: C+. While still good, this wasn’t as good as the first match. Graves going for the knee was the right move as his finish is a leg lock. Why is that such a complicated idea for so many people to grasp anymore? The finish probably ties into the Dallas attack which is fine, and it’s nice to see Shield still around here. If nothing else they have unfinished business around the NXT Title.

Graves takes the TripleBomb as the fans chant for Shield. Ambrose says Shield isn’t done with NXT. Rollins promises that things will get better, but first they have to get worse.

Overall Rating: B. This show is the most continuously entertaining hour of wrestling every single week. We had two solid matches here, a not terrible Divas match, and a run-in by the top heel group of the main roster. Oh and Dallas was attacked, which may or may not be because of the Shield. This was a solid show and very entertaining for an hour of wrestling. Good stuff.

Results

Justin Gabriel b. Leo Kruger – 450 Splash

Aksana b. Emma – Spinebuster

Corey Graves vs. Conor O’Brian went to a no contest when Shield interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

I’m no financial genius but these numbers look like they’re going up in the right places.

• Revenues totaled 5.1 million as compared to 2.9 million in the prior-year quarter.
• Operating income was $2.6 million as compared to a loss of $13.1 million in the prior-year quarter.
• Net income was $0.6 million, or $0.01 per share, as compared to a loss of $8.6 million, or $(0.12) per share, in the prior-year quarter.
• Operating income was $5.4 million as compared to $3.1 million in the prior-year quarter, and Adjusted Net income was $1.3 million, or $0.02 per share, as compared to $1.8 million, or $0.02 per share, in the prior-year quarter.
• Vince McMahon had the following comments..

  “In the fourth quarter, we continued to make important progress on our key strategic initiatives, expanding the production and licensing of new programs and enhancing our brands. Although we did not announce the launch of a domestic television network during the year, we believe, now more than ever, that we can realize the full value of our intellectual property using a variety of approaches in our global markets. Our confidence is based on the rising value of content and the tremendous global appeal of our brands.”

Here’s a preview from the Wrestlemania 15 redo which sums up the Attitude Era:

We recap HHH vs. Kane. Chyna had turned on DX and joined the Corporation I believe late last year. A few weeks before this she was holding HHH for a fireball shot from Kane, only to take it herself. HHH standing up for the honor of his friend who isn’t his friend anymore because she turned on him. As an act of friendship, HHH painted himself gold and wore a flowery robe while imitating a crossdresser and launched a flamethrower at Kane, burning him again.  Later in the show, Chyna would turn on Kane and reunite with HHH, only to have BOTH of them turn HALF AN HOUR LATER to join the Corporation.

This of course is REAL entertainment, unlike what we got on Monday night right?  Oh wait Cena sometimes makes jokes aimed at ten year olds so he isn’t entertaining right?  Clearly it’s time to turn him heel, like everyone else in the Attitude Era did, sometimes more than once an hour!

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 28, 2000
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 12,256
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

I don’t know if I just got confused or what but I had a full intro ready for the show from February 28, 2005. Eh this show is probably more entertaining anyway. It’s the night after No Way Out which means that HHH has retired Mick Foley and is still world champion. Other than that Big Show is officially #1 contender for Wrestlemania, which defies any and all predictions going into last night. Methinks something will change tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are HHH and the smoking hot Stephanie to open the show. The Game is all bandaged up but he says he can’t celebrate. He should be excited after last night but instead he’s depressed because of how much he respects Foley. Just a month ago in this arena, the two of them beat the tar out of each other and HHH is sad to see him go. The fans chant for Foley and HHH says he respects him. Stephanie isn’t pleased but he says it’s a guy thing.

HHH has a highlight reel of Mick’s career which starts off very nice but turns into a DX video of the beatings HHH has given Mick over the years. After the video HHH cracks up laughing and talks about how much better the company will be with Foley gone. Stephanie says Foley can now be a fat disgusting retired loser instead of an active one. This brings out Shane and Big Show for McMahon Time.

He talks to Stephanie about how managing the world champion will determine who controls the company because that’s what the main event scene of the WWF is about right now. Shane wants Big Show as champion instead of HHH or The Rock because Show is awesome apparently. They stare at each other a bit and here’s Rock to pick things up a bit.

Rock talks about how proud he is of someone out there. It isn’t Shane for returning last night in Rock’s match. It isn’t Stephanie being a tramp. It isn’t Big Show for going to Wrestlemania. It isn’t to HHH for still being world champion. It’s to all four of them at once for being the biggest bunch of orifices on the face of the earth. That’s not what Rock wants to talk about though. He guarantees he’s going to Wrestlemania and that he’s going to be WWF Champion. HHH actually uses the “this is an A B conversation” line on Rock. Dear goodness I can’t believe I heard that.

HHH thinks Rock blew his chance and says that Rock goes back to the bottom of the ladder. That means that tonight, he gets to face the Brooklyn Brawler. HHH was teasing that it would be Foley before saying it’s the Brawler. Funny stuff there. HHH gets in his own If You Smell line and Shane says there’s no chance that Rock is going to Wrestlemania as the #1 contender.

The Hardys yell at the APA for doing something last night at No Way Out. A brawl is teased but the Hardys want a match. They turn over the poker table to make sure they get what they want.

Hardy Boys vs. Acolytes

We get a clip of the Acolytes jumping the Hardys after their match last night. See how easy that was? Fifteen seconds, angle explained, problem solved. Apparently Terri turned on the Hardys last night and might have hired the Acolytes to destroy Matt and Jeff. The Hardys dive on the APA in the aisle and there go the shirts. Obviously it’s a brawl to start but the APA gets the better of it, double teaming Matt in the ring. Matt and Bradshaw get us going as we hear about Bradshaw’s stock portfolio. He kicks Matt in the face for two before pounding away in the corner.

Matt comes back with a tornado DDT and makes the tag off to Jeff. There’s a flying forearm to Bradshaw but Jeff is caught in the fallaway slam to put him down. Off to Faarooq who is immediately rolled up for two but pops back up and takes Jeff’s head off with a clothesline. Back to Bradshaw for more of the same power brawling but Faarooq comes back in to punch a bit more. Jeff escapes the Dominator and hits a jawbreaker to get himself some space. Everything breaks down and Matt makes a blind tag and sneaks in for a Twist of Fate on Bradshaw to end things.

Rating: C-. This was fine if a little short. As is almost always the case, power vs. speed works as well as anything else does. The Hardys were on the rise at this point while the APA was on its way out as a team that meant anything. At the end of the day though, they’re strong guys that beat people up so it took awhile for them to outlive their usefulness.

Angle tells a security guard which of his two title belts weigh more. He thinks the IC Title weighs more because it represents more countries.

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Angle has made an open challenge to anyone for a European Title match. Before the match he puts his foot in the mouth about New York City before talking about the open challenge a bit. Anyone that wants to come out can, so here’s the opponent.

European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Rikishi Phatu

That’s surprising as Jericho got screwed out of the IC Title last night so you would expect him to come out for revenge here. Yeah it’s still Phatu here but that name would be gone soon. Rikishi has a bad ankle but takes Kurt down quickly and drops a leg. Angle avoids the Stinkface with a chop block before pounding away. He walks into a Samoan Drop though and a charge in the corner. Now the Stinkface works and Kurt loses his mind. He staggers to the floor and walks out.

Angle yells about how this was supposed to be wrestling, not whatever that was. NOW Jericho comes out along with Chyna and Angle is trapped. Jericho chases Angle back into the ring for the Rikishi Driver and a Banzai Drop for good measure. Cue the Radicalz to beat up everyone in sight until Too Cool makes the save. Of course now it’s time to dance, including Chyna and Jericho. This was a big deal back in 2000 so the place goes NUTS.

Post break Jericho is about to talk when the Radicalz force their way up to them. Saturn challenges Jericho to a match for later.

Edge and Christian vs. Head Cheese

The Canadians are #1 contenders due to beating the Hardys last night and now have Terri with them. Many of you might not be familiar with Head Cheese but it’s actually a clever idea. The idea is Al Snow and Steve Blackman teamed up for no apparent reason, but Blackman is REALLY boring. Snow of course takes it upon himself to make him interesting, so he tries everything from team names (Snow has head and head cheese is a thing so there you go. Also suggested was the Snow Bunnies) to cheesy entrance music which he tries tonight. Blackman keeps his stone face the entire time and it’s hilarious.

Edge and Snow start with the Canadian hitting a middle rope shoulder. Off to Christian for some modified Poetry in Motion. Terri is on commentary and complains about the Hardys not visiting her enough. Head Cheese (drawing a chant) stomps on Christian before it’s off to Blackman for a one on one beating of Christian.

A backbreaker sets up a middle rope elbow to the back for two. Snow hits a German suplex for two but an Edge distraction breaks up a moonsault attempt. Edge comes in legally now and cleans house but a DDT only gets two on Al. Terri gets up and pulls a big cheese head hat out of a bag to distract Blackman, allowing Edge to spear him down for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here but man alive I never cared for Terri. She wasn’t that attractive and she was annoying almost every time she was seen. I didn’t like the match that much either as it made the Canadians look kind of lame in that they needed Terri to beat a team like Snow and Blackman.

The Rock vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Brawler gets in some shots in the corner but it’s the Rock Bottom to end it in about 40 seconds.

Post match Rock grabs the mic and says he doesn’t want to leave New York yet. He wants HHH out here right now for a fight. Cue HHH with Stephanie trying to hold him back. Before they get to the ring here’s Shane to stop it from happening. Wrestlemania is going to be HHH vs. Big show you see. “Well the Rock says if that’s Wrestlemania, then Wrestlemania is going to ABSOLUTELY SUCK!” For no apparent reason whatsoever, Stephanie gives Rock a handicap match tonight against HHH and Big Show for a shot at the title at Wrestlemania. Rock says it doesn’t matter if it’s his last chance and that’s that.

Chris Jericho vs. Perry Saturn

It’s a slugout to start with Jericho taking control. Saturn immediately comes back with a pumphandle throw followed by a mostly missed Vader Bomb legdrop. A big clothesline stops a Jericho comeback bid but Chris hits the bulldog to put Saturn down. The double powerbomb looks to set up the Lionsault but Dean low bridges Jericho, sending him to the floor. Chyna gets thrown into the ring for no apparent reason and there’s a suplex for her troubles. Saturn loads up a suplex but Chyna comes back in and hits him low, allowing Jericho to hit the Lionsault for the pin.

Rating: C. The match was fine but there’s something else I want to talk about here. Notice how great it is to be able to throw the Radicalz into the mix like this. They’re known names already but they’re fresh to the WWF, giving their new audience matches they might not have seen before. The Radicalz were an excellent boost to the roster and gave it several new ways to go with feuds. That’s a big reason why WCW was crushed even further.

Road Dogg tells Billy that he (as in Billy) is too hurt to fight the Dudleys tonight so X-Pac will go for the titles with Roadie. Billy doesn’t like this decision and says that with one arm he’s twice as good as HHH would ever be. A beatdown ensues as the Outlaws are done for good.

Hardcore Title: Mark Henry vs. Crash Holly

Mark is challenging and has a pregnant Mae Young with him here. The fans continue their running joke by calling Crash Elroy. Crash gets beaten up and almost immediately bails up the ramp. Mark pulls him back to the ring but Crash sends him into the post and hits him with a 2×4. Henry throws Crash around and loads up a splash, but Mae wants to splash him instead. She lands on Crash but hurts her stomach and the match is stopped.

During the break we found out that Mae is in labor. Oh dear goodness it’s THIS SHOW???

Tazz vs. Chris Benoit

Tazz is almost brand new at this point, yet he’s been around the company longer than Benoit. See what I meant about what bringing in new talent could do for you? They go straight at each other to start but Benoit gets the first big move with a snap suplex for two. Benoit charges into a Tazzplex though, only to have Eddie Guerrero distract the referee. Another throw puts Benoit down but Eddie does it again. That earns Guerrero an ejection Benoit pounds Tazz down and rolls some Germans as Boss Man and Albert come out here to beat on Tazz for the DQ. They had a mini feud going at this point.

Benoit leaves and Tazz is finally put down by a choke bomb from Albert.

Mae won’t have the baby without having a cigar. Apparently she hasn’t had any monthly issues since 1957. Brisco looks between her legs and retches. This is airing on live television people.

Post break Mae Young gives birth to a hand, marking the official lowest point in the history of the wrestling industry.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Road Dogg/X-Pac

The Dudleys won the titles from the Outlaws the night before and this is kind of a rematch. It’s a brawl to start with the champions clearing the ring. Bubba and Roadie officially get things going and Dogg takes the reverse 3D for no cover. Bubba hits Road Dogg a little bit low and it’s off to D-Von. There’s a neck crank to the Dogg for a few moments followed by a clothesline. Bubba comes in and drops a few elbows for two.

Dogg fights back out of the corner and snaps off the shaky jabs, only to have D-Von break up the last punch. Dogg clotheslines Bubba down and there’s the tag to X-Pac. He kicks both Dudleys and avoids a charge in the corner before hitting the Bronco Buster on Bubba. Cue Kane to chase Pac off and chokeslam Road Dogg, throwing the match out.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as the match was just filling time until Kane came out. Kane vs. X-Pac went on for a VERY long time and got pretty dull after awhile. Somehow Rikishi would be brought into it at Wrestlemania but that’s another story. The Dudleys were still new here and hadn’t really established themselves yet. They would come around soon enough though.

Everyone not named X-Pac gets chokeslammed.

Big Show and HHH talk strategy.

Here’s the actual tribute to Mick Foley which is pretty solid.

Big Show/HHH vs. The Rock

The team has to tag here and HHH gets us going. They slug it out and HHH actually takes over but walks into a back elbow to put the Game down. Rock and HHH fight up the ramp but here’s Big Show to uneven the odds again. Back in and HHH brings Show in legally for some large man offense. A backbreaker puts Rock down and a legdrop gets no cover. Trips comes back in for some choking in the corner before bringing Show in for an elbow drop. Still no cover though as HHH gets another tag.

HHH sidesteps a charging Rock and sends him out to the floor to keep Rocky in trouble. Rock comes back with a quick neckbreaker but the facebuster puts Rock down again. Both heels double team Rocky but he sends Big Show into HHH before DDTing the big man. A clothesline puts Show on the floor and it’s a Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow to HHH but Shane comes in for the DQ, meaning Rock didn’t pin either guy and loses his shot.

Rating: C. For a quick Raw handicap main event this wasn’t that bad. The drama was the important part here and that worked out pretty well overall. The point of this match was to make it seem like Rock was going to miss out on Wrestlemania and when I was twelve years old, they did a great job of making me believe it. Not bad here.

Rock gets triple teamed to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was pretty decent overall, stupidest moment in wrestling history aside. They’re clearly starting to set up Wrestlemania now and it was a good move not to have Foley show up here. The idea was for him to be completely gone and until about a week before Wrestlemania, that was actually the case. Rock would get his shot back in two weeks so all was right with the world.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Elimination Chamber 2010
Date: February 21, 2010
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 17,628
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

Well it’s the day after the show and thanks to me being an idiot my regular laptop is in the shop so this is my second try at this. The card looks pretty weak on paper as there are only four announced matches, including one that no one wants to see. However with two chambers it’s hard to assume this is going to be bad, although I’ve seen others that were far better looking that sucked so we’ll find out. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of course all about the Chamber which is rather annoying but that’s how things go. Why is it annoying? Because it’s exactly what you would expect it to be, which says to me that it’s boring as all goodness. WOW that’s a lot of pyro. And the Chamber is lowered for this.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Ted DiBiase vs. HHH vs. John Cena vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Cena gets a VERY mixed reaction but I think it’s leaning towards more cheers than boos which is a good sign I guess. I’m digging those white ropes. DiBiase gets an ok at best reaction. I do like them giving the young guys a chance if nothing else. They get main event experience even if there’s no chance any of them win it. Ok Striker needs to drop the metaphors already.

Orton gets a POP. Just turn him already Vince. He needs it. HHH gets a pop but nothing compared to Orton or even Cena for that matter. No one has ever won more than one Chamber match. Except HHH. He’s won four. Nothing wrong with that is there? Apparently Sheamus has to get all the eliminations. Kofi and he will be starting us out. Kofi looking over his shoulder just in case is rather amusing. Kofi is rocking red tonight which is working for him.

Can someone get Armstrong a weight in his arm? EPIC RKO chant. They touch on the Orton/Kingston feud. Sweet goodness that was awesome. This three man commentary team is working really well for me. The clock runs down and it’s HHH. There’s not a ton to talk about at this point as everything here means very little. Sheamus needs a name for his Razor’s Edge as Cole just calls it that finishing maneuver.

That high knee always works for some reason. They clarify that you have to get the pin in the ring. Good to know as that’s always a question I think about in these matches. Kofi sits on the outside here and lets them fight which is very smart. Scratch that as he hits a cross body on Sheamus.

Kofi hits a sweet Boom Drop over the top rope onto HHH. That looked great. Clock starts up again and it’s Orton to a nice pop. He’s beating the heck out of everyone. This guy is dying to be a face already Vince. Can you not see that? He’s beating the tar out of Sheamus and HHH which is awesome. SHUT UP STRIKER. It’s not a metal thing with fangs. It’s a cage blast it.

The fans want blood. Kofi takes everyone out with a huge dive. He’s getting a lot of big spots in this. He goes for another but Orton catches him with a dropkick. Nice indeed. Everyone goes for their finisher and no one gets it. Orton’s head slams into the post. That looked SICK. In at 5 is DiBiase.

I love that falling punch. Orton and DiBiase team up and beat down just about everyone. They shove Kofi’s head through the Chamber wall and DiBiase puts a Boston Crab on him. Orton gives HHH the elevated DDT onto the cage. That would hurt indeed. He and DiBiase wait on Cena outside his pod so of course he plows through them. He cleans house and hits an FU over the top rope on DiBiase.

DiBiase is in the STF and his leg isn’t supposed to bend like that! Rhodes is here with a pipe. DiBiase hits Orton with it as he’s in the FU and then takes Cena down with it. Ted pins Orton so we’re at five. Kofi puts him out with Trouble in Paradise and Sheamus hits his two move combination to take Kofi out so it’s Sheamus, HHH and Cena left. The pale one takes over and for NO apparent reason, HHH saves Cena.

And of course HHH gets to pin Sheamus first. So at the moment is the title vacant or is Sheamus technically champion as the match he’s defending in isn’t over yet? I’m not sure. A few seconds later Cena gets the STF and HHH taps. I’ve read some posts saying HHH might not have been tapping. What show were you watching? Yeah he was tapping.

Rating: B+. Solid stuff here. It’s missing that little something extra to make it a classic but this is certainly more than good stuff. The timing here was solid as we had enough to keep it from being too short but not enough to get boring. Half an hour is just about perfect I think. Also there was the fact that all of the guys in here were given a chance to showcase themselves, especially Kofi. He stole the show out there and it worked very well. Very good stuff here.

Cena is celebrating and Vince’s music hits. Yep, there’s another match and it’s with Batista. Not going to bother with giving it a formal introduction. It’s 30 seconds long and Batista hits the spear and Batista Bomb for the title. This is what people complain about when they say the amount of title reigns mean nothing anymore. The angle is awesome though.

Mania video.

We recap the Bret/Vince feud. Good video but it has zero to do with what’s going on at the moment.

Intercontinental Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Kane

Never seen Drew’s intro before. That was indeed as sweet as it’s made out to be. Can we give Kane something though? The guy has jobbed more than anyone in history and what does he have to show for it? Very little that I can see. He deserves to have something at some point. I love that uppercut that Kane uses. It’s just sweet.

His in ring stuff is very good overall. We get a great stat: 20% of IC Champions go on to be world champions. That’s something most people wouldn’t pick up on. And yes I’m a Kane mark so get over it. I didn’t realize Drew was that big. And let’s talk about the Raw world title again. Drew goes for the knee. And then the arm. Make that the ribs. PICK SOMETHING BLAST IT. Ok it’s the arm. Better than nothing I guess.

Both guys hit big boots which there’s just something cool about. I mean how awesome is it to just kick someone in the face? Kane hits the clothesline from the top and shakes his arm to sell the injury even more. The chokeslam is countered and it’s still Kane in control. The ramp seems exceedingly short for some reason.

And after Kane dominates 80% of the match a thumb to the eye and the double arm DDT ends it. Never been a fan of that, at least not a setup like a thumb to the eye. I like Drew’s look with the belt if nothing else.

Rating: B-. Not bad but nothing that jumps off the page here. The ending was just bad to me. Kane DOMINATED for about 80% of the match and a thumb to the eye is enough to stop him dead? That doesn’t do it for me. Even a knee or something small like that would have made it a lot better. Still though, the purpose here was to give Drew more credibility and that was certainly accomplished so big points for that.

We get the EPIC, yes EPIC I say, reveal of Gail being able to speak French and knows Maryse has being insulting her. Gail CANNOT ACT. I said in the LD that this is getting to Stephanie levels. Oh and the Smackdown Divas aren’t sexy apparently.

Raw Women’s Title: Gail Kimvs. Maryse

So this is the final of the tournament that has gone on forever to replace Melina who is injured now. No one cares about this anyway. And Vickie has something to say. Apparently the Smackdown Divas don’t like being left off the show so we’re getting a tag match with Raw vs. Smackdown. For the love of cheese and crackers, no one cares. Whatever. Oh and Striker has something close to a racist joke as he says once you watch a Gail Kim match you want to see another 20 minutes later.

GailKim/Marysevs. MichelleMcCool/Layla

Oy seriously? For the life of me I do not get this. Maryse would beat Gail clean the next night anyway, so what the heck is the point to this? I just do not get it. To be fair I don’t care enough to figure it out anyway so there we go. Yep the Smackdown girls are way hotter. Gail and Layla start us off and it’s not very good at all. Basically Maryse refuses to tag in and it’s a handicap match. Yep she won’t tag and Michelle kicks the tar out of Gail and the Styles Clash ends it. Maryse beats her up afterwards.

Rating: N/A. I have no idea what the point of this was unless they’re setting up to unify the titles at Mania or something like that. This was a waste of time and the only perk were the looks of Michelle and Layla.

Ad for NXT.

Miz talks about Daniel Bryan and makes fun of St. Louis. MVP interrupts him and of course he’s got another title shot tonight.

Regal comes out to talk about his rookie for NXT. Edge interrupts Regal’s standard great heel promo to talk about how he’s going to make his pick tomorrow on Raw. It’s Jericho in case you didn’t know by now. Regal gets speared for no reason at all.

Another ad for Mania. I really hate the theme song they’re playing the entire time.

US Title: Miz vs. MVP

I love Miz’s theme music I think. Both guys have their fat tag partners with them. He really does look awesome with all that gold. And the Kool Aid Man is still fat. Naturally the talking is mostly about Daniel Brian and NXT. Why in the world should I care about MVP? I have zero idea what the appeal of him is. Oh and apparently he’s a power guy now? We get Tiger Woods jokes. Oh dear. They try to compare the last few years in their two careers.

Both have come miles. Yes but Miz has gone forward and MVP has gone backwards. This has been fairly entertaining. It’s nothing epic but it’s certainly doing ok. I just can’t stand MVP at all anymore so that has something to do with it. Show’s shouting is funny to me. I hate that Ballin Elbow. It’s just stupid on so many levels. On the floor Henry goes after Show and hits the railing which more or less explodes. Miz is busted open a bit and Show punches MVP to let Miz retain.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all here. It was a great way to get some time on the card filled in which this show needed badly. Also, Miz gets another win to further establish him as a big deal. This is a win he should have gotten and he did. That’s all you can ask of him. Decent little match here indeed.

We recap the Raw Elimination Chamber. REALLY? We need to recap a moment that happened an hour and a half ago? On a PPV? Is this for people that bought the show halfway through or were late getting home? Seriously, who is this for? They show the whole Batista thing. Seriously, is this for people that are stuck with their fathers at a car dealership because their fathers are pathetic liars that just HAD to buy a new truck on the night their son was paying for their first PPV? It could happen.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Undertaker vs. CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. R–Truth vs. Chris Jericho

Rey is out first and thankfully he’s only been world champion once. Morrison is out second and gets a solid pop. Remember he has a bad ankle allegedly. Jericho gets a solid pop of his own. Taker is fourth and this is the interesting thing. In case you didn’t hear, he was set on fire by the pyro.

Let’s see if I can see it unlike anyone else watching the show. Ok the fire is going on and he’s not there yet. Ok there he is and everything seems ok. The flames keep going up but you can’t see where they are in relation to him. Everything seems fine at the moment though.

RIGHT THERE! The flames go up in the middle of everything where he would have been standing so I’d bet that’s where it happened. It’s right as Chimmel is saying his name. Oh yeah when they go down he’s nearly running out of there. Oh man he is TICKED.

There’s a moment where the camera locks on Rey which is when I’m guessing Taker has water poured on him. Now let’s think about this for a minute. Taker, other than running to the ring, which is fairly understandable I’d say, completely stayed in character there.

Think about that: he was just involved in what could have been a life threatening situation or if nothing else something that could have caused severe injury to him. He stayed in character. You can complain about him all you want, but that my friends is discipline. I don’t think the announcers have a clue what was going on but they play it up as the Chamber changing him. Punk cuts a promo on his way to the ring which of course is epic.

Seriously, this gimmick could carry him for ten years easily. Truth cuts him off. As I’ve said before, wrestlers that get the crowd involved or play to them are ALWAYS going to be bigger deals. Think about this match for example: Truth, Jericho, Rey and Punk got the biggest reactions. Taker here is an exception but look at Morrison. He doesn’t play to the crowd much and he got a far weaker reaction.

Truth talks to the fans, Rey does the mask thing, Jericho and Punk’s promos are insulting to the crowd. They get bigger reactions and they’re the four here with world titles. Morrison doesn’t have one yet does he? And the length of time in the company argument doesn’t hold up as Morrison has been in WWE longer or as long as Punk.

Morrison and Punk start us off. Apparently Serena is Punk’s concubine. Ok then. Truth is dominating here. They’re using the Chamber really well here. That’s a big thing that puts this WAY ahead of its I guess you would say counterpart, Hell in a Cell. They messed that show up so badly I can’t comprehend it.

After a missed elbow, GTS puts Truth out. And now we wait for the rest of the clock and Punk gets to talk even more. That’s a great mini gimmick. He mentions making Taker tap. Love that. It’s Rey in next so we’re getting what’s likely a Mania preview here. They fight outside on the cage area with Rey getting slammed into the cage. Cool spot.

Rey is getting destroyed with a capital destr here. Punk tries a GTS from the top rope and Cole makes me laugh. Striker: you can tear a tendon up there. Cole: how about falling on your head? And Rey gets the rana and a splash from the top for the pin to get us down to four. Ok then.

Next in is Jericho to a nice reaction. He hits this 619 but Jericho gets outside to avoid the really weak pin off a really bad move. Rey hits the Spiderman spot which is always cool. These two can’t have a bad match I don’t think. Rey hooks a form of a dragon sleeper and the IWC rejoices. Solid stuff here.

Rey is in the Walls as the clock ticks down and it’s Morrison. For ZERO apparent reason, he goes for Jericho who lets go of the hold. Yep that makes no sense at all. In a cool spot Morrison goes up top and Rey shoves him into the pod. That would hurt like the Dickens. Morrison hits the standing shooting star on Rey. Solid stuff but they’re just milling around waiting on Taker to come in here. Jericho hits a SWEET backbreaker on Rey to stop the 619 for no apparent reason.

Morrison gets that springboard spinkick that I freaking love. Rey is the only one with something close to control here. And Starship Pain puts Mysterio out to get us down to three. Morrison is getting to showcase himself here which is a big deal. Jericho gets the Walls on John and there’s the clock. And he hits Jericho which makes NO SENSE but whatever. Taker is getting NO reaction here.

The two living guys go after Taker which makes sense. Apparently half of Taker’s offense is his defense. What grade did you teach Striker? Jericho does something great as he hides in a pod. That’s very smart. Shame they’re clear so he’s easy to see.

With Jericho down Taker goes after Morrison who hits the kick again to put him down. Starship Pain is blocked and there goes Morrison’s chances. Jericho is hiding again which is brilliant. In a great looking visual, Morrison is hanging onto the cage while Jericho and Taker fight underneath him.

Taker is SLAMMED into the pod which would hurt like being crushed by 837lbs of macaroni. Taker getting a chant now. Morrison gets chokeslammed onto the cage and he’s gone. How have Jericho and Taker never had a long feud? There go the straps. Jericho is in control here but both guys are banged up. Taker goes for the chokeslam with FREAKY looking eyes.

After a bunch of counters, Jericho gets the Walls. Cole points out that he’s in the middle of the ring, even though in a bit he points out that ropes mean nothing in this match. Make up your freaking mind Cole. Jericho hits the Codebreaker which Taker jumps in to, making it look all the better. Last Ride hits and Taker kind of throws him with it. That looked great. We get the Tombstone sign and there’s Shawn. You know the rest.

Rating: A-. I loved this but I would have liked seeing Jericho get the clean pin and for the first two guys getting more time. Either way they pushed a lot of Mania here which is the best thing they could do. The wrestling here was great and they had Morrison do what he had to do out there. This was great stuff though and it worked very well. Great match.

Overall Rating: A-. Sweet show, period. This was great all around with good action, bloodshed, Mania being set up and some shockers. Excellent show and while there are parts that are annoying, there’s nothing here that’s that terrible. Great show, well worth checking out.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Nitro #110
Date: October 20, 1997
Location: Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Attendance: 5,950
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re finally at the go home show for Halloween Havoc and the show is on the hottest streak it’s been on since it first started. We’ve had three weeks straight of good to excellent show and hopefully things continue in that direction from here. After last week it’s very clear that Sting vs. Hogan is coming in the very near future but tonight it’s the final push towards Hogan vs. Piper in the cage. Let’s get to it.

We open with the NWO b-team laid out in the back. We see the letters DDP spray painted on various things along with Piper t-shirts and ball bats on the ground.

In the arena Hogan and Bischoff storm the ring, yelling about improper leadership from Piper and various other things in general. Hogan calls it a bunch of crap and Savage joins in for more yelling. The announcers of course laugh.

There’s a cage above the ring.

Cruiserweight Title: Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie is defending in match #4857 of about 58379 between these two. Eddie shoves him to start so Benoit runs him over with a shoulder block. They chop it out before Benoit launches him into the air in a release flapjack. Benoit stomps away in the corner but Eddie comes back with strikes of his own. Very fast paced stuff so far. A dropkick puts Benoit back into the corner but Eddie misses a charge and is launched face first into the buckle. The Canadian chops away in the corner and knocks Eddie out to the floor.

Back in and Guerrero snap mares Benoit down before taking some skin off with a chop. Benoit will have none of that though and puts Eddie on the apron before chopping him into the barricade. A suicide dive takes Guerrero out and we take a break back with the champion holding an abdominal stretch but Benoit arm drags out of it.

Eddie comes back with a headscissors and more chops in the corner. We’re told that Hennig is still US Champion after last week’s messy ending which is the wrong call but whatever. Benoit tries a tornado DDT out of the corner but gets sent into the middle buckle for his efforts. The Frog Splash retains the title clean.

Rating: B-. Really solid opening match here with both guys chopping the tar out of each other every time they were in the corner. Benoit knocked himself silly by hitting that buckle so the Frog Splash was academic. Good match here but that goes without saying when it’s these two. Their chemistry is some of the best of all time and this was no exception. Somehow, this was Eddie’s worst match of the week by miles and miles.

We get the ending of the US Title match last week which somehow keeps the title on Hennig. That was a pretty bad screwup.

Bill Goldberg vs. Wrath

Wrath’s entrance takes about two minutes to get through. The match: spear, Jackhammer, pin in 20 seconds. Wrath didn’t even get his helmet and coat off. We also get an error from Tenay who calls the Jackhammer a combination suplex and powerbomb instead of a powerslam. This would be back in the day when Tenay was the smartest guy in wrestling and might have made one error a month if he was having a bad night.

Goldberg shouts WHO’S NEXT in the aisle before getting in a staredown with Mongo who is coming out for his match. Sounds like Goldie has a feud coming.

Steve McMichael vs. Mortis

Mongo jumps Mortis to start and Vandenberg is freaking out on the floor over possibly losing two matches in a row that fast. Mongo pounds away in the corner but Vandenberg protects his investment by tripping up Mongo, allowing Mortis to hit a quick Flatliner (Samoan Drop off the middle rope) to get control. A Death Valley drier gets the same and McMichael is thrown to the floor. The suplex from the middle rope (just the rope, not in the corner) brings Mongo back in for two but Mongo shrugs it off. He hits a few three point shoulders and the tombstone for the pin on Mortis out of almost nowhere.

Rating: D+. This was on the higher end for Mongo although I’m not sure this was the best way in the world to set him up for a match against a machine like Goldberg. Somehow Mongo would be around until 1999 and would still get to hang out with Ric Flair until the very end. I’m not sure what the appeal was of the guy other than his football stuff, because it certainly wasn’t anything of note between the ropes. This wasn’t awful though.

Raven is at a playground and talks about his bad childhood. He sits on a slide as he talks about this, which prompts a quick sidebar: why do we not get promos on location anymore? Taking people outside of the arena can add a lot to the promos, if nothing else just for a change of scenery. Look at HELL NO having their segments in a meeting room. It worked far better than it would have in the back and got funnier results when we put these guys in the real world. Why don’t we see more of that?

Time for Lucha Libre and the Mexican Luchadores. This time we focus on Rey Mysterio who talks about how he used wrestling to get out of a barrio in Mexico City. He got his name from his uncle but has surpassed his uncle’s success. Rey talks about how important the mask is to him but isn’t sure what would happen without being able to wear it. Nice way to tie this into the match on Sunday.

Juventud Guerrera vs. Yuji Nagata

Nagata pounds away to start and the kicks start ripping into Juvy seconds after the bell. A big boot to the face misses though as Raven and the Flock arrives. Juvy charges into a powerbomb but elbows out of a German suplex grip. A quick rana puts Nagata down for two and Juvy chops away. Nagata misses a charge in the corner and gets caught in the back with a missile dropkick. I might as well watch this match on mute as the announcers are talking about the NWO non-stop. Onoo crotches Juvy as Dragon comes out to take care of Sonny. The Nagata Lock ends Juvy in a short match.

Dragon goes after Onoo but runs into Nagata for some double teaming by the evil ones.

Los Villano vs. Damian/???

We don’t find out the partner as Giant comes out and destroys everyone in sight. Giant talks about Kevin Nash lying about being the true giant of wrestling. The luchadores try to fight the Giant and get powerbombed for their efforts. The build for one of Starrcade’s big matches begins.

Savage talks about Page and the PPV. Short and nothing out of the ordinary here.

TV Title: Disco Inferno vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio speeds things up to start and gets a fast rana for two. Rey charges in again but gets caught in a powerbomb for no cover by the champion. Disco heads to the floor for no apparent reason and allows Rey to hit a baseball slide. Back inside and a sunset flip gets two on Disco so Rey goes to the apron. He hits a kind of messed up cross body and loads up the West Coast Pop but Eddie comes out for the DQ.

Eddie goes for the mask, but who cares about that because IT’S JACKIE TIME!!! She comes out to beat up Disco and the champion runs. Please get to Sunday so we can move on to ANYONE but Jackie.

Hour #2 begins.

Here’s the NWO again with Hogan going on a RANT about how Page, Piper and Sting are cowards for what they did earlier tonight. Bischoff says no one is leaving the arena tonight until those three get out here. Trash is thrown and Eric says that Vince is afraid of him. I have no idea what that has to do with anything but it’s the end of a short appearance from the bad guys.

US Title: Curt Hennig vs. Dean Malenko

Hennig is still champion coming into this. Curt is a big banged up from being attacked earlier so he’s in slow motion tonight. They both grab a fast hammerlock but Dean is in better condition so he rolls the champ up for two. Hennig bails to the floor for a bit to clear his head before getting droppkicked down back inside. After that gets two we take a quick break.

Back with Hennig suplexing Dean down for a quick two. Dean fights up and hooks a chinlock which isn’t exactly something you would expect from a good guy. Back up and Hennig tries to fight back, only to get caught in a belly to back suplex. Thankfully the NWO is involved in this match so the announcers actually give it some attention. Dean goes up top and hits a cross body for a VERY close two, only to walk into the HennigPlex for the pin a few seconds later. Oddly abrupt ending.

Rating: C. Not either guy’s best work here as the match never really got going. They were going through the motions pretty bad here which is really surprising given how awesome Malenko was back in 1997. Hennig would be facing Flair in the future to get him back to matches that actually mattered. At least Dean got to hang in here with someone on a higher level.

Nitro Girl time.

Scott Norton vs. Ray Traylor

Oh come on. Did THIS match really need a rematch? Seriously? As the match starts, Traylor has to scare off Vincent, allowing Norton to his a fast (kind of?) powerslam for two. We get the slow offense that you would expect from Norton: knees in the corner, clothesline, clubs to the back, all in slow motion. Ray comes back with a splash in the corner and a spinebuster, followed by a fat man enziguri of all things. He hits his sliding uppercut before going up (?) and hitting a fat man cross body, only to get painted in the eyes by Vincent. A clothesline ends Traylor.

Rating: D. Again, did ANYONE think we needed to see this match? Also, Traylor gets to lose again, making sure that he gets no momentum behind him and making sure that the NWO D team is made to look strong, because we certainly can’t have Scott freaking Norton do a job on Nitro right?

Traylor gets beaten down by Hall, Konnan, Norton and Vincent post match.

We get an ad for Assault on Devil’s Island. Oh that’s going to be bad.

Booker T. vs. Lex Luger

We’re still months if not years away from Booker meaning anything. Lex throws Booker around to start and poses a lot to start things off. T. comes back with a forearm to surprise Luger but Luger comes back with a powerslam. The jumping elbow misses Booker of course (did that thing EVER hit?) but Booker’s elbow misses too. He Spinaroonis up though and kicks Lex down before hooking a chinlock.

That goes about as far as a chinlock can go as Lex fights up and ducks a side kick, sending Booker into the ropes. The forearm puts Booker down but he manages to block the Torture Rack. A spin kick puts Luger down but the Harlem Hangover (top rope flipping legdrop) only hits mat. The Torture Rack is enough for the tap out a few seconds later.

Rating: C. Much better than I was expecting here as Booker showed some of the skills that he would get to really put on display months later. Luger continues to have very little to do going into the PPV as we’re getting closer to the match with Hall. No Larry or Hall here which is kind of surprising.

Luger has nothing of note to say post match but Larry comes out and says he’ll be an impartial referee on Sunday.

Here’s Hall for the Survey. You know the drill I’m sure.

Scott Hall vs. Scott Steiner

Hall is Hall and Scott is Steiner here for the sake of simplicity. This is a return match from last week with the Steiners winning the titles. Hall hits the driving shoulders to start things off but Steiner runs him over. Hall comes back with a kind of suplex/backdrop to set up an armbar. Steiner won’t have any of this being suplexed stuff so he throws Hall down as well before clotheslining him out to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Steiner messing with Hall’s hair. There’s a full nelson and Hall looks drunk. Odds are he is so I’m guessing the hold is working fine. Hall breaks it up by ramming Scott into the corner and clotheslining him down. The fallaway slam gets two on Scott and he makes fun of Giant with a chokeslam. Hall walks around like Frankenstein’s Monster before hooking an abdominal stretch. After over a minute of the hold, Hall gets caught holding the rope and the referee breaks things up.

Steiner grabs an abdominal stretch of his own but instead uses it for a pumphandle slam. There’s an overhead belly to belly to put Hall down again and a Steiner Line does the same. Hall ducks a second Steiner Line and punches the referee, wanting a DQ. Instead there’s a Tiger Bomb from Scott but there’s no one to count. Hall comes back though and hits the Outsider’s Edge as a hooded black referee comes in to count the pin. It’s Vincent if you couldn’t tell.

Rating: C-. Not bad here with Steiner getting to show off some skills here. He’s about to turn heel and become Big Papa Pump though and end one of the best tag teams ever. Hall was in two feuds at once here which left him kind of in the middle of nowhere, as he didn’t get to focus on one or the other. He’s spent two weeks fighting the Steiners and now he gets to fight Luger on Sunday. Why they didn’t do the tag title change later (or at Road Wild when it would have made sense) is anyone’s guess but it would have made things easier.

Here’s the NWO for the third or fourth time tonight to close the show. They want the attackers here right now and they prove it by having Bischoff rip on McMahon some more. Hogan gets to plug his movie but here’s Sting. By Sting I of course mean “Sting.” As he’s coming down the aisle, two more Stings come through the crowd and jump the NWO. It’s Piper and Page of course. The cage lowers and Sting repels from the ceiling to beat up the NWO to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Well you knew the hot streak wasn’t going to last forever. We’re limping into the show on Sunday and the cage match is going to reach levels of bad that you didn’t think were possible before this match. As for tonight though, the show was slow and long which aren’t two things you want to mix together. There’s some good stuff in this but it’s definitely an episode you could skip.

Here’s Halloween Havoc if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/02/23/halloween-havoc-1997-age-in-the-cage-and-one-of-wcws-best-matches-ever/

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