Is the instant rematch clause.  Here’s why.It’s pure laziness.  After a title change, the bookers get to take a month off from booking and give the champion the same opponent he just faced.  This causes lazy booking, bad promos, uninteresting matches, and a loss of momentum because the new champion hardly ever loses, and if they do there’s ANOTHER match in a month.  Have the challenger earn the match.  Yeah, have them WRESTLE to get the show.  Imagine that: wrestling might draw on a wrestling show.

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: October 24, 2006
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

More ECW goodness here as we inch closer to Cyber Sunday and the Champion of Champions match which means we’re inching closer to December to Dismember and the night ECW was thrown off a cliff. The main event tonight is a ladder match between Van Dam and Big Show, which may or may not be for a shot at Show’s title. The only other thing I have to say is this is being written six years to the day of the show which isn’t interesting but it fills in some lines. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap from last week with Van Dam pinning Big Show. During that match, Hardcore Holly saved Van Dam from an attack by Test.

Theme song.

Here’s RVD to open things up. He brags about being the first guy to beat the Big Show and says he wants the world title shot now. Here’s Heyman with his security who praises RVD and has a contract for a title match for RVD. But that contract is going to be held above the ring and must be retrieved using a ladder. Why would Heyman agree to give Van Dam his specialty match to get a title shot? Why not make it like a body slam challenge or something like that? Either way, the security jumps Van Dam but gets beaten up just as quickly.

CM Punk vs. Matt Striker

Punk immediately hits a kind of spinebuster to take Striker down and Striker is in trouble on the mat. We get some chain wrestling before Punk sends him down to escape a cravate. They trade a series of hammerlocks but Striker finally grabs the rope to escape. Punk fires off knees to the head but gets sent shoulder first into the post. Striker works on the arm for a bit but Punk kicks him in the head to escape. The knee in the corner and the bulldog sets up Punk’s finishing sequence but Mike Knox runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This was a squash until we got to Punk getting beaten up for the DQ. Striker was a fine character as the whole teacher thing worked really well, but at the end of the day the guy was not any good in the ring at all. There are only so many ways you can get around that and Striker never found one. Punk vs. Knox hopefully will end soon.

We get a quick recap of Holly going after Heyman a few weeks ago which also sets up Holly vs. Test tonight.

Test vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly pounds away to start and Test is all BRING IT ON. Test drops to the floor and Holly is fine with taking it out there. He isn’t however fine with being sent into the post and being sent back in for more pounding from Test. Holly comes back with a kick and a legdrop as the fans aren’t thrilled with this match.

Test gets tied up in the ropes and Holly pounds away even more. That’s what this whole match has been for about three minutes or so now: punching and occasional kicking. Holly suplexes Test over the top and out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Test with a body grip on the mat. During the break Test rammed Holly’s back into the post three times. How nice of them to put that during the break and let us see this rest hold instead.

Test sends Holly into the corner for two and puts on a bearhug. Holly escapes and kicks a bent over Test in the face to put both guys down. A big back elbow puts test down as does a clothesline. Holly hits a top rope clothesline for two but Test elbows him down and goes up, only to get crotched. Holly gets two off a middle rope legdrop before escaping the pumphandle slam. The Alabama Slam is countered too so Holly kicks Test in the very low abdomen. Test pokes him in the eye and sends him shoulder first into the post. That and a rollup with a handful of tights gets the pin.

Rating: D. There are multiple problems here. Problem #1: the match sucked. It was mainly punching and kicking and boring back work which didn’t go anywhere. Second, at the end of the day this is Test vs. Hardcore Holly, the latter of which wrestling as a face. Holly, in this character at least, is one of the least likable guys in ECW. The other problem is the same one I’ve said many times: these guys are career midcarders in the WWE and it’s really hard to care about the two of them fighting. They’re on ECW because they’re not good enough to make it on Raw or Smackdown, and the match is evidence of that.

Post match Test hits Holly in the back with a chair a few times.

More Marine nonsense.

We run down a few matches for Cyber Sunday, including picking Umaga’s opponent. Sandman is an option, and Sandman says he thinks he’s the best option because it’ll be violent and bloody. Well Sandman never was much of a talker.

Rob Vam Dam vs. Big Show

It’s a ladder match and if Van Dam wins, he gets a title shot at Show at some point in the future. The bell rings after a break which is nice as we don’t have to waste part of the match later. Van Dam immediately gets a ladder which is a smart move….I think. Show throws the ladder out so Van Dam starts firing off kicks. He hits a slingshot legdrop to the back of the head to take over and brings the ladder back in. Show comes back with a headbutt and chop to take over.

Rob gets whipped into the ladder in the corner, sending him to the floor. Show tries a different approach, lifting the ladder in the air and swatting at the contract. Rob gets in a shot and brings in another ladder to blast Show in the head. Show is cut open and Van Dam leans a ladder against the corner. He shoves the ladder at Show and kicks said ladder against Show’s head. Nice move.

Rolling Thunder hits the ladder which is on top of Show but Rob’s back is hurt too. Rob goes up but Show shoves him onto the ropes to slow things down again. A ladder to the back keeps Show down and man is the champion bleeding badly. Show stands on a ladder on top of Van Dam and Rob is in trouble. Show spears Rob down to stop a comeback attempt and hits a simple punch to the head to take Rob down again.

Van Dam gets slammed down onto the ladder but Show’s Vader Bomb misses….as always. Are heels that confident that they keep trying the same moves over and over again even though it’s NEVER worked? There are big welts on Rob’s sides. The left side of Show’s face is COVERED in blood. He can see well enough to chokeslam Rob down but he’s slow and fat so it takes him forever go climb the ladder. Rob climbs up even faster and hits a seated senton into a rana over the top. Rob gets up and sprints up the ladder to get the contract for the win and the title shot. Apparently Van Dam gets to pick the time and place.

Rating: C+. The idea for a Big Show ladder match is to have the other guy use the ladder while Show uses his size and power with the ladder as the occasional prop. That worked here as it was Van Dam bouncing off Show the entire match and a high risk/leverage move that got the win for Van Dam. Good match here, especially for an ECW main event.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event was good, but the rest of the stuff here wasn’t working. Guys like Test and Holly are not interesting, especially when they’re the same guys they’ve been for years but on Tuesdays instead of Mondays. The main event stuff is fine, but the heels on this show other than Big Show are horrible at this point. Good main event, but a weak show overall.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

NXT
Date: October 24, 2012
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tony Luftman, William Regal

Back to NXT again and it’s still the same feuds we’ve had for the last few weeks if not months. They need to add in some new ones soon because this is starting to wear a bit thin. The feuds aren’t to the point yet where they’re stale or anything, but they’re inching towards that being the case. Hopefully things can be adjusted tonight. Let’s get to it.

Earlier today Heath Slater came in to see Dusty Rhodes. Slater wants a title shot against Rollins but Big Dust says you have to earn the shot. Vickie comes in to interrupt. Oh sweet goodness she’s on THIS SHOW TOO??? She wants to recruit Slater but Dusty says that Slater can have a title shot if he wins tonight. I have no idea why Vickie was here at all.

Theme song.

Brodus Clay vs. Camacho

Brodus gets the full entrance here and has his old hat because his burial hasn’t happened in NXT time yet. There’s a new commentator with Regal now and he’s got a good voice. The ring announcer sounds like Matt Striker. Brodus shoves him down and dances a bit before suplexing Camacho down.

Brodus punches away a few times in the corner but gets his knee taken out. A dropkick puts Clay down and it’s off to a nerve hold. Clay fights up but gets caught in a Samoan Drop. Camacho heads to the floor and glares at the Funkadactyls which gets him nowhere. Back in and Camacho jumps into the headbutt followed by the suplex and splash for the pin at 3:53.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here but for the life of me I don’t get the idea of depushing a guy like Brodus. He’s a guaranteed pop to open a show but he gets to lose to a guy like Slater on Smackdown? Oh well, the guy only got over on a stupid gimmick and the company did nothing with him so it must be Brodus’ fault right?

Kassius Ohno vs. Trent Barreta

Trent takes him down and cranks on the arm as things speed up. A fast rollup gets two on Ohno and things stay fast. Ohno throws him to the mat and hits an elbow in the corner, only to have Trent clothesline him out to the floor. A BIG dive takes Ohno out but as they get back up Kassius sends him into the apron to take over again. A knee to the back of the head gets two and it’s off to the cravate.

After the hold is cranked on for a bit, Ohno kicks him in the head and puts the hold right back on. Riveting stuff. We actually hear the name Misawa on WWE TV as Regal talks about Ohno revering Misawa in Japan. Trent comes back with a slap to the face for two and sends Kassius to the corner.

Barreta charges at the ropes and jumps onto the middle one, launching himself sideways into an elbow in the corner. I’m not sure what was supposed to happen as the elbow looked like it hit but Ohno was fine and Trent went down. Maybe Trent hit his head? Anyway, Ohno pounds away some more but here’s Richie Steamboat with a towel. He throws it into Ohno’s face, allowing Trent to hit his running knee to the face for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: C. As usual, Trent is fun to watch and I fail to see what the appeal is of Ohno, especially in this character. I guess he likes to be violent and physical but that’s not really much of a character, especially given what Ohno is capable of. Also his name being Kassius Ohno doesn’t help him much either. This was a nice job of furthering the Steamboat Ohno feud I guess, but it needs to wrap up or have them fight soon.

Layla/Alicia Fox vs. Audrey Marie/Paige

Alicia vs. Paige gets us going and Paige hits a quick dropkick. Alicia hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two and a double tag brings in Layla vs. Audrey, who is looking quite good in white here. After Layla dances a bit, she takes Audrey down with a rollup for two. Layla hits a quick kick to the face for two and a kick to the head gets two as well. Regal points out how rare it is to see two British women wrestling in WWE.

Back to Alicia who hits a northern lights suplex for two but Audrey grabs a quick rollup. The kickout sends her into the corner for the tag to Paige in a nice spot. Paige comes charging at the freshly tagged in Layla who clotheslines her down for no cover. Paige picks Layla up for that fisherman’s DDT of hers but Audrey tags herself in. Paige and Audrey get in an argument and Layla rolls Audrey up for the pin at 5:03.

Rating: C. It’s amazing what happens when they treat the Divas like something serious instead of a joke. The match wasn’t great or anything like that but it was more entertaining than most of what you get on Raw anymore. Layla is still pretty annoying, but Paige and Audrey are a breath of fresh air in the division. This isn’t as good as the match from I think last week with the girls, but it was still solid.

Video on the tour of Egypt.

Bronson vs. Lincoln Brodrick

Bronson is a guy in a hoodie who resembles Boris Zhukov and/or Ivan Koloff. Brodrick (that’s how it’s spelled in the graphic) is a musclehead who looks familiar but I can’t place him. Ah apparently he wrestled under the name Marcus Anthony (his real name and a great wrestling name) in OVW for awhile.

Bronson immediately puts on a front facelock and takes Lincoln to the mat. A hard clothesline takes Lincoln down and a leg trip does the same before it’s off to a freaky looking leg lock to make Lincoln tap at 1:08. The best way I can describe the hold is like a Figure Four but with Bronson’s legs sticking up instead of going down under Lincoln. Bronson looked awesome here.

Ohno throws a fit in the back.

Here’s Antonio Cesaro with something to say. He says that he’s the champion of everyone here because he’s the champion of all America. Cesaro asks us to stand for the national anthem but most people don’t seem interested. Instead here’s Tyson Kidd to interrupt him. Tyson makes fun of Cesaro’s man purse (Cesaro: “IT’S NOT A PURSE!!!”) and says he wants a title shot right here. Cesaro goes off in some other language, but Kidd says he’s got something universal. He slaps Cesaro and the champion bails to the floor.

Heath Slater vs. Seth Rollins

Non-title here and Vickie is managing Slater, presumably as a tryout. I’m assume this is from before the 3MB. JR has replaced that Tony guy on commentary. Slater shoulderblocks him down to start and a headlock takeover does the same. Rollins comes back with a chop and Slater bails to the ropes. Rollins works over the arm and while holding a wristlock, plays air guitar with it in a funny bit.

Slater heads to the floor and slows things down a bit. A baseball slide puts Slater on his back in the aisle and Vickie yells at Heath to win. We take a break and come back with both guys hitting cross bodies at the same time back in the ring. They slug it out for some boo/yay time from the audience before Rollins takes over with a dropkick.

An enziguri from the apron staggers Slater and Heath is backdropped to the floor. There’s a suicide dive to take Slater out and Heath is reeling. Back in a springboard I think knee to Slater’s head gets two but Rollins walks into that falling Cutter for two for Heath. Rollins kicks Heath in the head and hits a standing Sliced Bread #2 for the pin at 6:46 shown of 7:16.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but it never got to the level that you would expect from Rollins. The problem here is that Rollins is a bigger deal than Slater, who is arguably the king of jobbers in the WWE. For Rollins, this wasn’t much of a challenge and the match wasn’t really much to get excited about.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked this show a lot with the main event being the weakest part. Bronson is a guy that I’m interested in as he looks tough and dominated in his first match. On top of that the more Trent Barreta I see the happier I am. This episode was a nice surprise as things were starting to get a bit stale with the long running stories.

Bringing in a new character helps, as does bringing in the main roster people to put the NXT guys over. Oh and the new announcer isn’t bad. He sounds like someone with a lot of announcing experience but not necessarily in wrestling. Regal had to tell him of a lot of names of moves and the new guy didn’t sound entirely sure who the wrestlers were. For a debut though, he sounded fine and didn’t make any mistakes that I heard.

Results

Brodus Clay b. Camacho – Splash

Trent Barreta b. Kassius Ohno – Running Knee to the Face

Layla/Alicia Fox b. Paige/Audrey Marie – Rollup to Marie

Bronson b. Lincoln Brodrick – Inverted Figure Four

Seth Rollins b. Heath Slater – Standing Sliced Bread #2

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Survivor Series 1988
Date: November 24, 1988
Location: Richfield Coliseum, Richfield, Ohio
Attendance: 13,500
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

It’s year number two of the series and there’s a new champion in the form of the Macho Man. He and Hogan have formed the Mega Powers and are in the main event tonight against the Twin Towers who are neither twins nor towers, but they’re two monsters in the forms of Big Boss Man and Akeem, formerly the One Man Gang. There are only four matches again here but it’s a long show as well. Let’s get to it.

Gorilla and Jesse go over the rules (elimination rules, pin/submission/countout/DQ for an elimination) and we’re ready to go.

Team Ultimate Warrior vs. Team Honky Tonk Man

Ultimate Warrior, Brutus Beefcake, Sam Houston, Jim Brunzell, Blue Blazer

Honky Tonk Man, Bad News Brown, Danny Davis, Ron Bass, Greg Valentine

This is fallout from Warrior winning the title at Summerslam. Brunzell is subbing for Don Muraco who has left the company at this point. That’ll be a recurring theme tonight. Valentine and Beefcake starts us off, making it the second year in a row that Beefcake has opened for his team. It’s quickly off to Davis and the sleeper puts him out in less than a minute and a half. Well to be fair there’s no reason for him to be around anyway. Valentine charges right back in to continue the war of the original Dream Team, which I doubt most people would remember at this point.

Greg goes after the legs as is his custom, but since we’re only about three minutes into the match, the Figure Four is broken up. Well to be fair everyone says that Valentine doesn’t get warmed up for about ten or fifteen minutes so he’s still looking for his keys at this point. Off to the Blazer (played by then mostly unknown Owen Hart) who drops an ax handle onto Valentine, giving us the trademark slow fall.

Valentine goes for the arm (not a hammer lock which takes away the irony of it) but Blazer easily takes him down with a headscissors and brings in Brunzell. The Killer Bees were gone at this point so he’s just a guy in trunks. He’s a guy in trunks with a good leapfrog though as he clears Valentine with a lot of room to spare, only to get slammed down. Brunzell pops up and hits the dropkick but it’s off to Bad News. Sweet goodness was this guy born in the wrong generation. Imagine him after the rise of MMA, remembering that he’s a legitimate Olympic bronze medalist in judo.

Brown comes in like the headhunter he’s known as and kills Brunzell with a clothesline. Brunzell tries some basic stuff so Brown kicks him in the chest and beats on him in the corner. Brunzell misses a charge in the corner and the Ghetto Blaster (enziguri) gets the easy pin to tie things up. Brutus comes in and grabs Brown so Houston, one of the least intimidating guys ever, can come off the top with a double ax.

Houston misses a charge in the corner and Brown pounds on him like a stupid looking dancing white boy. A clothesline takes Houston’s head off and here’s Valentine. Make that Brown again and Valentine accidentally hits Brown. That ticks off Bad News and he walks off. That’s not a face turn. He just didn’t like anybody. Houston tries to steal a pin on Valentine but Greg is like boy please.

Off to Bass in a match that I think happened before in the NWA. A rollup gets two for Houston but he charges into another boot in the corner. That’s a popular move in this match. A middle rope cross body gets two for Sam and a forearm from Bass takes his head off for two. Houston’s monkey flip is countered into a powerslam and he’s gone, thank goodness. The guy is just not interesting or good at all.

Warrior comes in to fire the crowd up and attacks everyone left on the other team (Valentine, Bass and Honky vs. Warrior, Beefcake and Blazer at the moment). Honky comes in because he’s not that bright and there he goes, flying through the air off a shoulder tackle. Off to Bass who gets slammed down and hit with a Rocket Launcher from Blazer. Honky comes in and is cross bodied down immediately. A monkey flip and dropkick have Honky in even more trouble so it’s off to Valentine.

Owen gets crotched on the head of Valentine during a leapfrog but apparently Blazer has balls of steel because he suplexes Valentine down and drops a knee for two. Blazer goes up but Honky shoves him off, sending Owen down onto his knee. The Figure Four means a quick elimination by Valentine and we’re down to 3-2. Off to Beefcake vs. Valentine and Jesse mentions that these guys were not only a team but tag champions. Why is that such an afterthought?

Off to Bass who also has history with Beefcake but that isn’t mentioned here, despite it happening like three months before this. A headbutt keeps Beefcake down and it’s back to Elvis Man. His contribution is ramming Beefcake’s head into Bass’ boot and tagging in Valentine. Well no one ever accused him of being a ring general. After Warrior charges in like an idiot, it’s back to Honky for Shake Rattle and Roll, but Brutus backdrops out of it to start his comeback.

Back to Bass who hits a top rope clothesline to keep the advantage and brings in Honky who goes up. Beefcake punches him in the ribs because Honky is about as fast as Arn Anderson at going to the top. Beefcake wins a slugout and we get the eternally funny selling of an atomic drop by Honky. There’s the sleeper but Man dumps them to the floor and they fight to a countout.

This leaves us with Valentine and Bass vs. Ultimate Warrior. Gee I wonder what’s going to happen. A double clothesline puts Warrior down but Valentine can only get two. More double teaming works for a bit but Warrior gets to the ropes and starts shaking. Another double clothesline doesn’t work and an ax handle each gets the two pins to make Warrior the sole survivor.

Rating: C. Not the best match in the world but for a midcard match it was fine. Warrior was insanely over here (as well as insane in general but that’s another talk for later on) and the fans erupted for his comeback at the end. The rest of it is just ok and there’s nothing wrong with that. This was the right choice for an opener though.

Team Demolition vs. Team Powers of Pain

Powers of Pain, Rockers, British Bulldogs, Hart Foundation, Young Stallions

Demolition, Brain Busters, Bolsheviks, Fabulous Rougeaus, Conquistadors

Now here’s a famous match. Demolition won the titles at Wrestlemania and are rapidly becoming faces based purely on fan reactions. They’re with Mr. Fuji here. These are the same rules as last year, meaning if a member of a team is beaten, he and his partner are both gone. Los Conquistadores are masked guys and would probably be played by different guys every night. My guess here would be Jose Estrada and Jose Luis Rivera here.

British Bulldog starts with let’s say Conquistador Uno. It’s quickly off to Jacques who was having legit backstage issues with the Bulldogs at this point. Off to Zhukov vs. Shawn and Michaels moonsaults out of the corner ala Daniel Bryan. Marty comes in and I’m not likely going to mention every tag here given how fast they’re happening. Ax comes in to pound on Jannetty and it’s off to Arn Anderson of the Brainbusters. Tully comes in and gets beaten up in the face corner for his efforts.

Jacques is tagged to be the fourth heel in about a minute and a half. Dynamite pounds on Jacques which is probably the most interesting pairing in the match given their real issues. Jim Powers comes in for about a second before it’s back to Dynamite to face Raymond Rougeau. A sunset flip gets two for Dynamite and it’s back to Powers to face Zhukov. Smash comes in and Powers is in trouble. Jacques dropkicks Powers into the corner and here’s Bret to a BIG pop. Bret quickly small packages Raymond to get things down to 5-4. There are still a ton of people on the apron though.

Off to Roma vs. Volkoff with Roma being in trouble quickly. Roma comes out of the corner and in an impressive spot, he jumps from the mat to the top rope and hits a spinning crossbody for two. Volkoff comes back with a dropkick of his own and it’s off to Smash vs. Neidhart. Jim quickly tags out to Barbarian for the real feud of the match: Powers vs. Demolition. Smash, still a cowardly heel, brings in Conquistador Dos.

Warlord comes in to pound on Dos as does Bret. Ax comes in and kicks Bret down before it’s off to Tully. Bret clotheslines Tully down and from the mat they tag in Shawn (he and Bret have to interact at Survivor Series. It’s like law or something) and Smash respectively. Volkoff and Smash double team Shawn with Nikolai hitting the gorilla press backbreaker. Back to Tully who immediately tags in Arn for the wicked spinebuster for two.

Uno comes in again and slams Shawn down but it’s off to Marty even faster. Back to Volkoff who tosses Marty around with ease. Davey comes in and the power advantage is negated. Nikolai brings in Tully who drops a lot of elbows on Davey before it’s off to Dos vs. Warlord. Warlord no sells everything and gorilla presses Dos into a tag to Ax. They slug it out with Ax taking over and handing it off to Smash.

Smash doesn’t do as well and it’s a double team from the Powers to take over on him. Tully comes in with a middle rope elbow to the head of Barbarian but Barbie clotheslines Blanchard’s head off. Barbarian tags Neidhart for a powerslam on Tully and then it’s off to Dynamite. Arn slows him down and brings in Uno who brings in Zhukov. Powers gets the tag and backdrops Boris, but Zhukov rolls through a crossbody for the pin out of nowhere to eliminate Powers and the Stallions.

It’s 4-4 now and Shawn comes in with a fist drop for two on Boris. Barbarian comes in and Tully gets tagged in. Tully realizes who he’s facing so he immediately tags in Nikolai without making a single bit of contact. Ax pounds away on Barbarian with current champion taking over. Off to Nikolai again with nothing of note going on. Shawn comes in to face Zhukov and makes a blind tag to Marty, who sunset flips Boris out of nowhere for the elimination.

Marty rolls up Dos for dos and it’s off to Uno for a BIG backdrop. Ax vs. Marty now as Ax takes over and brings in Arn. Davey gets the tag as does Tully and Blanchard is scared to come in again. I’m not sure why as he whips Marty into the corner and Jannetty is turned upside down. Smash comes in and puts on a front facelock but he tags off to Dos. It’s downhill for Demolition’s team now as the Harts pick apart both Conquistadores, including hitting something similar to the Demolition Decapitator on Uno. Amazingly enough that only gets two.

Shawn dropkicks Uno down and it’s off to Marty with another dropkick for two. Dynamite comes in and there’s the snap suplex. A middle rope kneedrop gets two and Jesse is impressed by Uno’s toughness. Back to Barbarian with a powerslam and a fist drop but he headbutts Uno into the wrong corner and it’s off to Tully. On Bobby’s advice, Tully goes right for the eyes and takes over.

Demolition double teams Barbarian and it’s off to a chinlock from Smash. Uno comes back in and is carried to the corner by Barbarian, but Ax makes the save and puts the chinlock on again. The Brainbusters come in for some offense but Arn puts his head down and gets kicked in the face. Off to Jannetty with a jumping back elbow and it’s time for Anvil. Neidhart immediately does the same thing Anderson did and gets kicked in the face as well.

Blanchard can’t suplex Neidhart and it’s off to Bret. Can we watch these two for 20 minutes or so? Bret pounds away in the corner and the Canadian tries a German on the American, but Blanchard gets his shoulder up and Bret is pinned. It’s now Demolition, Los Conquistadores and the Brainbusters vs. the Powers of Pain, the British Bulldogs and the Rockers. The Bulldogs beat up Tully and it’s off to Shawn. The Busters double team Shawn, drawing in Marty for a four man brawl. Both referees come in and both teams are disqualified and eliminated. It’s down to two teams apiece.

The four eliminated guys brawl to the back as Smash puts a chinlock on Dynamite. Off to Dos with a knee to the ribs, followed by Uno with a top rope forearm. Uno misses a kind of Swanton and it’s off to Warlord with a gutwrench slam. Barbarian comes in with the Kick of Fear followed by the delayed vertical suplex from Davey. Ax comes in for a power showdown with Davey.

Dynamite comes in and clotheslines Ax down before bringing in Davey to hit the gorilla press and powerslam on Dos. Barbarian hits a backbreaker to knock Dos into the corner for another tag, this time to Ax again. The Conquistadores take over on Barbie which isn’t something you say all that often. Dynamite gets a tag because Barbarian only has to fight off Uno.

Warlord gets a quick tag in and drops a leg but doesn’t cover, much to Jesse and Gorilla’s dismay. Dynamite comes in and ducks his head, allowing Uno to tag out AGAIN. Smash charges into a boot and there’s the snap suplex. The Swan Dive misses and a basic clothesline pins Dynamite, getting us down to three teams. That would be it for the Bulldogs as a team in America, mainly due to the medical issues of Dynamite and those fights with the Rougeaus I mentioned. Smash and both masked dudes work over Barbarian in the corner but he easily powers over to Warlord.

Warlord misses a charge and hits the post shoulder first and it’s time for Ax to pound away. Off to Smash who stays on the arm as Fuji gets on the apron. Off to Dos and then Uno with a top rope shot to the shoulder. Fuji is back on the floor now and Ax is in, cranking on the arm some more.

Fuji gets back on the apron and Warlord makes a comeback, only to be clotheslined down again by Smash. Fuji pulls down the top rope as Smash hits the ropes, sending him out to the floor. Remember that Fuji is Demolition’s manager. Demolition gets counted out and we’re down to one team apiece. Ax goes off on Fuji and Fuji hits him with the cane, only to get laid out with a slam.

Demolition leaves Fuji laying as we’ve got the Powers of Pain vs. Los Conquistadores left. They have a standoff until the Powers go out and help Fuji to his feet. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the ultra rare double turn. Back in the ring, Dos comes in to pound on Barbarian and it’s off to Uno. Fuji trips Uno and a headbutt from Barbarian gets the pin to win the match.

Rating: A. What a great match this was. It had EVERY tag team you could want to see in one match as well as a major move at the end with Demolition turning face. You had mini-stories in the match itself which is always a nice touch, with teams having short matches against each other. Also this was about five minutes shorter than the one last year which helped it tremendously. Great match and the 42 minutes that it runs flew by.

The Powers put Fuji on their shoulders post match. Demolition runs in and cleans house.

Bad News says he’s a loner no matter what and that he wants the world title.

Warrior says he can’t breathe properly because of the power stuffed down his throat.

Fuji says he made Demolition and now he’s going to break them.

Heenan says his team will win.

The Mega Powers are ready and Hogan wants Bossman.

Team Jake Roberts vs. Team Andre the Giant

Jake Roberts, Ken Patera, Jim Duggan, Scott Casey, Tito Santana

Andre the Giant, Rick Rude, Dino Bravo, Mr. Perfect, Harley Race

Casey is a jobber who is here because B. Brian Blair left the company. Blair was on the team because JYD left, so Casey is the third string guy. Rude and Patera start things off. This would be around the time when Gorilla suggested that Patera retire because he wasn’t any good anymore, so you can tell what kind of stuff we’re about to get. Rude gets thrown around a bit and it’s off to Bravo, as Gorilla implies Patera made him retire. Now there’s a trivia answer for….somebody I guess.

Bravo bangs on Patera a bit before it’s off to Perfect (called Curt Hennig as well here) with a double ax off the top. Patera shrugs it off and drags Hennig over to hand him off to Roberts. Jake works on the arm as he was known to do before bringing in Santana. Tito and Hennig have as good of a match as you would expect them to have with Tito getting the better of it, only to miss a charge in the corner. Hennig elbows him down and it’s off to Bravo again. Talk about bringing the talent level down.

Off to Roberts who hits Bravo once and then brings in Casey to really cripple the level. A monkey flip doesn’t work for him and now he gets his first real opponent on PPV: Harley Race. Race beats up Casey like he’s a grizzled veteran who is here because his investment went south and he’s working for the guy who caused him to lose all his money and is now beating up some jobber who got a spot on a major show because there was no one else available.

Rude comes in again and it’s time for everyone to get their shots in on Casey. This has to be some kind of initiation or something. Hennig headbutts him and hurts himself in the process. Back to Tito as the match gets a lot better all of a sudden. Did I mention I really like Santana? Patera helps with a double elbow to Perfect and it’s off to Duggan to fire up the crowd again. Hennig tries various things to Duggan’s head which don’t work at all. See, when Duggan does it he follows up. When Casey does it, he doesn’t do anything. One is a legend, the other is never heard of again.

Off to Casey again for some contractually obligated reason more than likely and he’s immediately drilled by Rude which makes my day better. Casey misses a charge and it’s off to Tito with a cross body. Duggan beats up Hennig as well but he misses an elbow. Duggan and Henig hit heads and it’s off to Rude vs. Patera. Patera throws Rude around but misses a charge and gets Awakened for the first elimination.

Casey tries to come in and jump Rude, only to be sent into the heel corner and beaten up even worse than before. Off to Race who hits a good old man dropkick before bringing Bravo back in. Side slam hits and it’s 5-3. See you later Casey, have fun training that Booker T guy. It’s back to the bread and butter of this match with Perfect vs. Tito…the latter of whom immediately tags out and brings Duggan back in. Ok then.

Hennig kicks Duggan in the face which he sells for some reason, but the punches that follow aren’t sold and Duggan gets all fired up. Duggan, ever the lunkhead though, gets fired up near Andre who chokes him down immediately. Back to Hennig for a second and then Rude comes in for his offensive contribution. Duggan finally clotheslines Rick down and it’s a double tag for Tito and Race.

Since Race is a genius, he moves aside of a charging Tito and slams Tito’s head into Andre’s. Well that’s one thing he’s good for. Dino comes in again but misses a charge into the corner and gets sunset flipped for two. Back to Race for the piledriver for two and he whips Tito in, only to get forearmed out of nowhere for the quick elimination, making it 4-3. Andre climbs in, grabs Tito, chokes him a bit and sits on his chest. For reasons that no one could figure out, Tito tries a freaking sunset flip. Pain immediately comes to his chest and Andre makes it 4-2 (Andre, Dino, Rude, Hennig vs. Duggan and Roberts).

Duggan comes in and clotheslines Andre into the ropes, where he and Jake both get in some open shots on the Giant. Jake chokes away but Andre gets his arms free. Andre, being a smart giant, tags out after getting beaten up that badly and brings in Rude. Rude whips Jake into the buckle a few times as we hear about the Cheryl Roberts story. Off to Hennig with some chops and Andre kicks a bit from the apron because that’s what evil giants do.

Hennig slingshots Duggan throat first into the bottom rope so Andre can choke a bit more. Off to Bravo who gets beaten on by a suddenly fired up Roberts. The short clothesline looks to set up the DDT but Rude leans in to break it up. Rick comes in legally now and stomps away like he’s still in Memphis, which means very slowly with a lot of playing to the crowd in between.

Dino piledrives Jake for two but an elbow drop misses and here’s Hacksaw again. Duggan sends him into the corner and literally throws him out before clotheslining him down. The Three Point Clothesline is loaded up but Frenchy Martin, Bravo’s manager, hooks Duggan’s foot. Bravo slams Duggan on the floor so Duggan hits Bravo with the 2×4 for the DQ, leaving Roberts alone 3-1. Bravo manages to get a tag to Hennig before Jake can pin him so Roberts punches Perfect instead.

The DDT is loaded up but Perfect makes the corner and it’s off to Dino again. Jake, likely drunk, tries a test of strength with a guy billed as the world’s strongest man. When that doesn’t work Jake tries another DDT but is backdropped this time instead. Back to Rude and Jake heads to the floor to think. Well he is considered a master of psychology so thinking is what he does. That and cocaine.

Back in and Rude takes over again, hitting a gutbuster on the Snake. Would that even hurt a snake? Off to a bearhug but Jake quickly thumbs him in the eye. Rude hits a top rope punch and swivels the hips a bit, only to have his tights pulled down and DDTed for the elimination. Andre comes in and hammers Jake before choking him in the corner….for a DQ. It’s two on one which means nothing as Hennig immediately covers Jake for the pin and the final elimination.

Rating: C-. The lower half of this match being pretty weak really hurts it. Other than Jake, Andre and Duggan, at this point most of these guys didn’t mean much. Rude was on his way up but he was still a glorified midcard guy here. Just not a very interesting match and it definitely didn’t need to go half an hour.

Jake puts the snake in post match but Andre is gone before it can get to him.

Andre says he said he would win and he did. He is NOT afraid of snakes though.

Jake says that he’ll take care of business with Damien. Next year, he’ll get his revenge.

The Twin Towers’ team is all ready.

Team Mega Powers vs. Team Twin Towers

Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Koko B. Ware, Hillbilly Jim, Hercules

Big Bossman, Akeem, Ted DiBiase, Red Rooster, Haku

Savage is world champion and this is based on a tag team feud which would be blown off in a huge live match on February 3. Hogan comes out to his own theme music after his partners all used Savage’s. This is actually a plot point as the Mega Powers would explode because Savage thought Hogan was taking his spotlight. It’s a Wrestlemania rematch with Savage vs. DiBiase to start things off.

They knock each other down with DiBaise taking over in the corner. The champ comes back with right hands and a clothesline. Off to Hercules who is feuding with DiBiase as Ted had called Hercules a slave, prompting a face turn. Instead Herc gets the Red Rooster who doesn’t do well at all, which is the idea. Heenan said he could take anyone, even Rooster, to the top. Off to Koko who gets in a shot to Ware and it’s off to Akeem (One Man Gang).

Haku comes in with a chop but misses a legdrop and it’s back to Herc. I’m not sure why when you have Hogan and Savage on the apron but whatever. Now it’s off to Hogan and the place erupts. He takes Haku down and drops some elbows before bringing Hillbilly in for a quick main event opportunity. Akeem comes in and runs Jim over before bringing Rooster in. Even Gorilla found that stupid. Jim doesn’t do much to Rooster so here’s Koko instead.

Rooster rams Koko’s head into the buckle, but see, Koko is black so it doesn’t hurt. A missile dropkick gets two on Red and it’s off to Hogan. The big boot sets up Savage’s elbow and it’s 5-4. Hogan’s team has a massive in ring celebration while Bossman’s team hits the floor. Heenan rips into Rooster as we get Savage vs. Haku. Haku chokes on the ropes but Hogan makes a blind tag and, brace yourselves, actually loses a slugout!

Haku hits a nice dropkick but gets slammed down and it’s off to Herc. A suplex puts Hercules down and it’s off to Akeem. A splash misses and it’s off to Hillbilly who fires away with all he’s got. Jim’s big boot doesn’t take Akeem down and a clothesline floors Jim. The 747 (big splash) gets the pin and we’re tied up. Koko comes in and dropkicks Akeem in the back before wisely bringing in Hogan to do the heavy lifting.

Back to the world champ with a double ax to the head but they can’t knock Akeem down. Hercules pounds away a bit as does Koko with a dropkick only sending Akeem into the corner. Akeem shrugs it off and hits Koko once to take over. Off to Boss Man who hits his namesake slam to make it 4-3. It’s Hogan in now and this is the match everyone has been wanting to see.

Hogan pounds him into the corner and everyone left on Hogan’s team (Hogan, Savage, Hercules vs. Bossman, Akeem, DiBiase, Haku) gets in a shot. Hogan easily slams the then bigger Boss Man but he charges into a spinebuster. That looked really good too. Back to Akeem and the big men hit a double elbow to take Hulk down. Off to Haku who gets in some shots to the neck before tagging in Boss Man. I wonder why they’ve gone so long since having DiBiase in there.

Naturally as I say that he comes in and clotheslines Hogan down. A falling punch gets two but Hogan Hulks Up. Off to Hercules for some revenge and some hard clotheslines and punches. Virgil trips him up though and a school boy eliminates Hercules. It’s now 4-2 but Savage charges in and rolls up DiBiase to pin him within about ten seconds.

Haku comes in again but misses a headbutt, allowing Hogan to get the tag. Something like a superkick takes Hulk down and it’s back to Boss Man for some headbutts tot he back. Akeem comes in for his usual shots before it’s back to Haku again, who suplexes Hulk for two. It’s nerve hold time followed by the Boss Man Slam for no cover. Instead Boss Man goes up and misses a splash.

The hot tag brings in Savage who cleans house. Slick trips Randy up and things slow down again. Boss Man puts on a bearhug as Slick goes after Liz, grabbing her by the arm. Hulk makes the save and DRILLS Slick with a right hand. The Towers go to handcuff Hogan to the rope but Boss Man gets counted out in the process. Boss Man beats on Hogan with the nightstick and then goes to beat on Savage. Akeem helps with that, drawing a DQ for himself and getting us down to Hogan and Savage vs. Haku.

Hogan is still cuffed to the rope though so it’s basically a one on one match. Haku beats on Savage as the camera is on the Towers leaving. Slick has the keys and is taunting Hogan with them. Savage holds the rope and avoids a kick but there’s no Hogan to tag. Haku accidentally superkicks Slick and Liz raids his pocket to get the key. Hogan is freed and Haku hits a top rope splash for two. Hot tag to Hogan and since it’s 1988, you can fill in the ending for yourself.

Rating: C+. While not great, this was better than the previous match to be sure. This would be part of the Mega Powers Exploding, as Savage would be jealous of Hogan for getting the glory and not being there for him earlier in the match. It’s no classic or anything, but 80s Hogan is always fun.

Liz hugs Hogan post match and you can see Savage getting madder and madder. See, the key to the old feuds is you see the things happen and THEN you get the turn, rather than getting the turn and then the explanation. In other words, it wasn’t all about shock.

Overall Rating: B. It’s definitely not as good as last year’s, but in this case you should check out the full version instead of the clipped one, because the clipped one shaves off like an hour of it and the interviews are different as well. The matches are much more hit and miss here, but thankfully they’ll tweak things a bit next year by going with four man teams and shorter matches, which does a lot of good for the pacing of the show. Also, did we really need guys like Koko B. Ware and Red Rooster in the main event? Really? Anyway, not a terrible show (the clipped version is a terrible tape) but certainly not as good as last year’s.

Ratings Comparison

Team Ultimate Warrior vs. Team Honky Tonk Man

Original: D

Redo: C

Team Demolition vs. Team Powers of Pain

Original: A

Redo: A

Team Jake Roberts vs. Team Andre the Giant

Original: F

Redo: C-

Team Mega Powers vs. Team Twin Towers

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: B

I’ve heard of getting better with age but this is a big change. I guess I’ve really grown to appreciate late 80s WWF more than I thought.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/07/history-of-surivor-series-count-up-1988-more-clips-than-my-last-haircut/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Watching Survivor Series 2001’s battle royal and this came to me:In the NWA/WCW, if you threw someone over the top rope it was an automatic DQ.  In a battle royal, you had to throw someone over the top and out to the floor to eliminate them.  What would happen in a battle royal where you could only be eliminated by throwing someone over the top rope for a DQ?

It could never happen you say?  Well Russo came up with a battle royal where the idea was to get into the ring instead of staying out.  Is this that much of a stretch?

It’s one of my thoughts, so you know it’s going to be based in old school stuff.Anymore WWE seems to be afraid to change anything about a character.  Look at Del Rio, Brodus, Ryder, Mahal and a large group of others.  They’re pretty much the exact same character that they were a year ago, if not even less developed.  Let’s take a look at the three biggest stars ever:

Hulk Hogan – Brought in as a generic big heel.  he had Freddie Blassie as a manager, was at the semi-main event level, and probably would have won the world title one day.  Then he went to the AWA, made Rocky III, left the AWA because Gagne wouldn’t wake up and realize what he had, came back to the WWF as the REAL AMERICAN and became the biggest good guy of all time, completely revolutionizing wrestling.

Steve Austin – Originally Stunning Steve who wore flowery tights, then a Hollywood Blonde who made camera motions, then a tradition hating guy who cursed a lot, then Superstar Steve in ECW, then the Ringmaster…..whatever that was supposed to be, then himself because Ted DiBiase left and they had no idea what to do but let him drink beer, flip people off, curse a lot and be a rebel, relaunching WWF to the top of the business and winning the Monday Night Wars.

The Rock – Brought in as a plucky young guy who was just so happy to be there, gets told to die by most of the fans, comes back as a cocky black power guy in the Nation of Domination, becomes a cocky jock heel, becomes a cocky jock face, becomes the greatest promo man of all time with at least a dozen catchphrases.

Of the three biggest guys, none of these guys were anywhere close to being the guy that they were brought in to be.  Rocky at least was supposed to be a guy who was going to be a big deal.  Hogan was never going to be the number one guy in the company in his original form.  Austin….not as the Ringmaster he wasn’t going to be.  Rocky got over huge, but as the polar opposite of what he was brought in as.

Sometimes you have to try a bunch of stuff until you find something that worked.  Look at Undertaker and Kane: Undertaker was  a natural, Kane took a bunch of tries to get what worked.  Try some effort WWE.  It’ll do you good.

WWA: The Inception
Date: January 6, 2002 (Taped October 26, 2001)
Location: Sydney SuperDome, Sydney, Australia
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Jerry Lawler

Now here’s one you may have heard of but probably have never seen. Once WCW and ECW went out of business, there were a lot of wrestlers that didn’t go to WWF. Well a lot of them got together and went on an international tour. This was before TNA so this was likely the most recognized talent pool outside of WWF. I have no idea what to expect here but it could be fun. The WWA stands for World Wrestling All-Stars in case you’re curious. Let’s get to it.

Jeremy Borash, one of the people behind this show, welcomes us to the first ever show and an Australian girl band sings the Australian national anthem.

A pretty standard opening video airs. Since this was taped months before it aired, we get clips of the show we’re about to watch.

There are BIG sections of empty seats visible.

JB is about to introduce the first match but more pyro and music cuts him off. It’s Bret Hart, the WWA Commissioner, with presumably the world title belt. Bret has never been in a ring in Australia before and he apologizes to the fans for taking so long to get here. It was about a year ago that he got released from WCW and he hasn’t watched any wrestling since then.

A few weeks ago he came down here to do some promotional work. After doing a TV show, he heard about 9/11 and he couldn’t get out of the country. He praises the people of Australia for making him feel welcome during that time, but now it’s back to wrestling. Bret isn’t going to be a token commissioner. Whoever wins the title is going to have to work very hard. Now we get to the WWF, which Bret isn’t thrilled with.

Hart talks about being world champion in the WWF and how no one in that company ever beat him. Then he was in WCW and the last thing he remembers is no one beating him for that title either. He runs down Goldberg, Rock, Austin and especially Vince because none of them ever beat him. Bret says tonight whoever wins this title is going to be get the torch handed to them. He says the WWA has integrity and it’s time to let the fun begin.

JB and Jerry talk about how the title will be awarded. It’s called the Seven Deadly Sins Tournament, meaning seven matches with seven different gimmicks. The title match will be in a cage.

We hear about some of the non-tournament matches which seem pretty weak. Luna Vachon vs. Gangrel in a Black Wedding match (whatever that means) and Norman Smiley vs. Crowbar in a hardcore match. Ok then. We also get the first round tournament matches, two of which are hardcore matches, one of which is a battle royal, and one of which that isn’t listed.

International Cruiserweight Title/Seven Deadly Sins Tournament First Round: Psychosis vs. Juventud Guerrera

So not only is this for the company’s Cruiserweight Title, it’s also in the world title tournament and is a ladder match. Don’t overbook anything there guys. Also since this isn’t the first event for the company, Psychosis already won the title at a house show before this event, but the title was stripped so that the “first” champion could be crowned here. Psychosis won the first one in case you were wondering. Juvy gets on the mic before the match and does his Rock imitation which never was all that funny to me.

Something very different about this show is that the commentary comes through the PA system, meaning the fans can hear it. They head into the corner to start with Psychosis taking over. Juvy comes back with a spinwheel kick and a tornado DDT as things speed up. They head to the floor with Juvy shoving the ladder down so that the top of it slams into Psychosis’ head. FREAKING OW MAN!

Back inside and Psychosis dropkicks the ladder into Juvy’s face, only to get it sling shotted into his own face. Psychosis is busted open bad. Back inside and the fans aren’t all that thrilled with this. Juvy hits a loud chop in the corner and the ladder is laid across the top rope. Juvy tries a sunset flip which means nothing in this so it’s back to the ladder. Jerry suggests going for the belt. Gee thanks King. Juvy gets draped across the top rope and Psychosis hits a guillotine legdrop across the back of his head.

We get the first attempt at going up the ladder but Juvy hits a springboard missile dropkick to take the ladder out and send Psychosis into the top rope. Juvy gets another ladder for some reason but just like earlier, Psychosis dropkicks the ladder into Juvy to knock him down.

Back in and Juvy rams Psychosis into the ladder before climbing up and hitting some kind of a dive which doesn’t really keep going once he hits Psychosis. The ladder falls down and hits the referee but he’s fine because it wasn’t a planned bump. They both go up the ladder with Juvy hitting a sunset bomb to kill Psychosis. He adds a 450 for good measure and climbs up to win the title.

Rating: C+. This was a fun spot fest and that’s about all you need for it to be. I’m not a big fan of the idea of just throwing two guys out there and saying the winner of this is champion, but at least it was fun in the process. The high spots in this were pretty good too and for what it was, this was a solid opener.

Some chicks called the Starettes dance. By dance I mean pose while moving a little bit.

Nathan Jones arrives with some celebrity. Lenny and Lodi, the gay tag team, greets him but he has nothing to say.

Disco Inferno needs security.

Seven Deadly Sins Tournament First Round: Konnan vs. Jesse James

This is one of the matches listed as a hardcore match earlier but here’s it’s announced as a dog collar (four corners variety) match. James of course is the Road Dogg who was released from WWF soon before this. He’s billed as Road Dogg Jesse James which is kind of surprising. Oh wait make that Road Dog. Big difference there. Konnan jumps Dogg during his intro and does his own version of it while holding up the Mexican Heavyweight Title.

Konnan rips into Road Dogg for being the only member of DX to get fired which fires up Roadie, but a belt shot puts him right back down. They’re attached by the chain now, but it’s a long enough chain that Dogg can be choked over the top rope while Konnan is on the floor on the other side of the ring. Back in and Konnan hits the Rolling Thunder clothesline and stomps away a bit. Konnan gets three corners but Roadie hits him low with the chain.

Road Dogg gets two corners but Konnan chokes away some more. Apparently you can win by pinfall here too. Thanks for letting us know halfway through the match. Road Dogg gets put in the Tree of Woe and Konnan hits a quick dropkick for no cover. Konnan hits ten punches in the corner but Dogg hits him low to break it up.

Dogg gets two corners but just like earlier, the chain goes between the legs to break it up. After three more buckles for Dogg, Konnan rips his own collar off and pulls out a metal pole of some kind to hit Dogg in the head. He takes the collar off again and goes up with the pole, only to jump into a boot to the face. Dogg hogties him, simulates anal rape, and slaps all four corners for the win.

Rating: D. This was a mess for the most part with the pinfalls being an option meaning nothing at all. Both guys were all over the place and it never got going as a brutal match. Again, that’s the problem with gimmick matches for the sake of having gimmick matches: there’s no reason to have the gimmicks and the match doesn’t have any extra heat as a result.

We see some models getting ready for a Skin to Win match. Jerry freaks of course. One of them happens to be a man. Literally. Lawler, who liked the view before the guy turned around, ERUPTS when he sees the crotch bulge.

Devon Storm vs. Norman Smiley

Storm is more famous as Crowbar. This isn’t a tournament match. Norman comes out dressed like a basketball player as is his custom. A quick cross body gets two for Storm but he gets sent to the floor. We get the first garbage can but the lid gets slammed on Storm’s head. The can of weapons is thrown into the ring and Storm guillotines Smiley on the rope and hits a slingshot splash for no cover.

Storm hits a moonsault onto a chair onto Norman to hurt both guys. Norman starts dancing but gets a stick to his head for his efforts. Storm’s suicide dive runs into a chair and it’s table time. After the Big Wiggle (arguably more simulated anal sex. There’s at least male on male spanking), Norman can’t suplex Storm through the table. Devon is busted but he dropkicks a trashcan into Smiley.

A slingshot plancha puts Smiley through the table but despite Storm staying on top of Norman, there’s no count. Smiley comes back and whips Storm into the barricade before putting a trashcan over him. Norman pounds away with a chair before they head up the ramp. A low blow breaks up another Big Wiggle and the brawl goes to the back. Norman is put in a cart and rammed into Disco Inferno who of course overreacts.

They come back into the arena with Norman getting wheelbarrow slammed onto a piece of barricade laid on its side. Storm pulls out another table but cracks Norman in the head with a trashcan lid first. Another table is stacked on top of the first table and Norman starts screaming. Norman escapes a powrbomb and slams Storm onto a trashcan. After some dancing by Norman, he gets slammed into the can just as easily.

Storm puts him on the top table and after climbing up the set, dives through Norman and the two tables with a big splash. It’s one of those spots that looks a lot better than it actually was. Norman reaches over and covers the dead Storm for the pin. After the big spot of the match, Storm doesn’t even get to win? Lame.

Rating: D. This went on WAY too long. It’s the longest match of the night so far, running about ten minutes. The problem with these matches is that once you see them beat on each other for about five minutes, the next four and a half before the big spot aren’t very interesting as it’s the same stuff we’ve seen already. Not awful, but WAY too long and Norman getting the win is kind of stupid.

Disco runs into two fruits in the back. Literally, they’re guys dressed as bananas. That’s not a euphemism or anything. They’re men dressed like a yellow fruit that you peel and eat that has a lot of potassium in it. Disco: “I SAID I WANTED TWO SUITS! NOT TWO FRUITS!” Comedy ladies and gentlemen!

We get some brackets but they don’t make a lot of sense.

???

Road Dogg

Battle Royal

Jeff Jarrett

Front Row

Juvy won and his match is listed in the first column of the brackets, but he’s not in the second round. I have no idea what Front Row is either. Ah apparently Juvy has broken ribs and can’t go on so he’ll be replaced instead of Dogg getting a bye. Nathan Jones is Front Row. One, what kind of a nickname is Front Row? Second, why put that instead of his name?

Stevie Ray is with Bret and I have no idea what Ray asked Bret. The battle royal is now an open invitational to anyone who works for the WWA. Stevie asks if he can get in on this and Bret says go for it.

Seven Deadly Sins Tournament First Round: Battle Royal

Buff Bagwell, Stevie Ray, Devon Storm, Norman Smiley, Disco Inferno, Jerry Lawler

That’s it. Six guys is all they could find and apparently before this, there were only four. That’s not much of a battle royal. Disco and Bagwell are the first two out and brawl before the match starts. Ray comes in as well, as do Smiley and Storm. Yeah I spoiled the people in it. Get over it. King throws Borash into the match as well so I guess there are seven people in it now? Ray puts Borash out almost immediately as referees and a cameraman get in. Disco throws out Storm so Storm jumps in on commentary. Borash was eliminated somewhere in there.

Some chick in a gold dress gets in as JB gets back on commentary. Jerry slams the girl down and the girl eliminates herself. Both referees are thrown out so we’re down to Bagwell, Ray, Smiley, Disco and Lawler. All four agree to jump Ray but only Disco winds up charging. They do it again and this time it’s Disco and Smiley that charge him. The Fruits in Suits (they’re in pajamas, so I guess they’re the Bananas in Pajamas which is a kids TV show from this era) come down as well because I guess there’s no time limit for getting in. Ray gets dumped and Lawler does the Big Wiggle on Smiley.

Norman hits Lawler low and tries to eliminate him but Buff puts them both out. The Fruits never got in the ring and we’ve got Disco vs. Buff. Buff hits a cross between a double arm DDT and a Pedigree as Disco is reeling. Disco comes back with a swinging neckbreaker before we get, I kid you not, the Village People’s Elbow. Ok that was kind of funny. The Fruits get in and eliminate Disco but Buff throws them both out to go on to the semi-finals.

Rating: C. Yeah it was a comedy match, but it wasn’t bad at being funny. When you reach the point where it’s so insane that it’s funny, a match like this can work. At the end of the day, the (arguably) biggest name in the match won and it didn’t last long. This was fine for what it was and I can’t actually complain that much about it.

Lawler goes after the Fruits to get an interview.

The girl in the gold dress is apparently an interviewer. The celebrity and Nathan Jones make sex jokes and aren’t worried about Jarrett tonight.

Seven Deadly Sins Tournament First Round: Jeff Jarrett vs. Nathan Jones

This is another one that was listed as a hardcore match but here it’s a guitar on a pole. Jarrett is in his old WCW shirt so I’d bet on a lawsuit soon. Jeff says he’s the chosen one with all the stroke and that he’ll win the title. Basically the same thing he said in every promo in his last WCW run. He says he’s in charge of things now instead of Bret and he calls out Jones to fight. You know, like Bret said we should do.

You might remember Jones from a cup of coffee he had in the WWE in 2003 but he never went anywhere. The guy is 7’0 tall and a ripped martial artist (who looks a lot like bald Kane actually), but he makes Khali looked like a ring general. Jones is also Australian so the place goes nuts for him. Jeff gets in some right hands but Jones big boots him down and loads up a chokeslam. Not only does he look like Kane but he wrestles like him too.

The chokeslam is broken up but a side slam puts Jeff down. I think you win by pin here. They head to the floor with Jarrett running from Jones. Back in and Jones hits a top rope clothesline to take Jeff down but as he goes for the guitar he gets hit low and crotched. Jeff gets the guitar, kills the celebrity (apparently a talk show host) with it, and hits the Stroke on Jones to advance.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere. The problem at the end of the day for Jones was that he just wasn’t that good. He looked like an absolute monster but he just didn’t have what it took to work in the ring. The WWE pulled him from Wrestlemania because they didn’t think he could survive on a live broadcast. Think about that for a minute.

The Starettes waste more time.

Here’s Lawler again to interview the Fruits. He calls them to the ring….but they can’t talk. Because they’re bananas you see. Now Lenny and Lodi come out (Lawler: “Now we’ve got four fruits in the ring.” You knew someone would say it.) and gay jokes abound. Bret finally shows up and puts Lenny and Lodi in the semi-finals instead of Juvy. Oh and the bananas are out.

Seven Deadly Sins Tournament Semi-Finals: Lenny vs. Lodi vs. Road Dogg

Gee I wonder who is winning here. Lenny and Lodi get to do their land in homosexual position spots but they argue over who gets to cover Dogg. Since it worked so well, they do the same sequence over again. Jerry makes gay jokes as Lenny crawls onto Dogg for the cover. Lenny and Lodi do the same thing over again as they argue over who should get the pin. Lenny misses a top rope dropkick and hits Lodi, but Lodi breaks up Dogg’s shaky kneedrop. A botched double flapjack puts Dogg down and Lodi rolls up Lenny for two. Lenny’s moonsault lands on top of Lodi and Dogg drops a knee to advance.

Rating: D-. This was stupid but you can tell Lenny and Lodi are having a lot of fun out there. Alan Funk (Kwee Wee from WCW) would replace I think Lodi in TNA and do the exact same gimmick with mixed results. Again, there was never any question who would win here but it was kind of funny I guess. Also, it was short.

Stevie puts his hat on to talk to Buff (Stevie: “I don’t like looking like no fruit booty”), who cuts a very generic promo about his match with Jeff.

Seven Deadly Sins Tournament Semi-Finals: Jeff Jarrett vs. Buff Bagwell

This is a, and I quote, T*** Whips and Buff match, which means the Starretts as lumberjacks holding whips. Buff’s graphic says Road Dogg but to be fair it’s their first show. Apparently Buff got to pick the stipulations. Ok then. Basic stuff to start and Jeff has to avoid a whipping. A clothesline puts Jeff on the floor and the girls chase him around some more. Buff gets sent to the floor and the girls help him up and rub his shoulders.

Jeff gets one of the whips and beats on Buff a bit and it’s off to a token reverse chinlock. Buff escapes with an electric chair and hammers away before sending Jeff to the floor for a whipping. Buff whips him a bit too and the referee says that’s not allowed so the referee takes a few shots too. In the ring the Blockbuster hits but there’s no referee. One of the girls counts and Buff (who wasn’t looking) celebrates, allowing Jeff to hit the Stroke to advance to the finals.

Rating: D-. Another comedy match here and it’s starting to wear thin. These matches aren’t funny and at about four minutes long, they aren’t coming off as important or anything like that. These are supposed to world title tournament matches but there’s almost no wrestling involved at all. That gets old in a hurry.

Luna and Vampire Warrior (Gangrel) have come to Australia to renew their wedding vows but they wound up fighting and have a match tonight.

Luna Vachon vs. Vampire Warrior

This is a Black Wedding Match, which I think means hardcore but I have no idea for sure. Luna slaps him and Gangrel won’t fight back because it’s his wife. Gangrel finally kind of slams her down and we head outside. There’s wedding themed stuff on the floor and Gangrel takes a cake to the face. Luna gets tongs and grabs Gangrel’s balls with them. We get a pumpkin shot in and you can connect the dots on this one yourself I think. Luna throws down her wedding ring and spits at him, earning her an inverted DDT for the pin. Nothing here at all but ANOTHER comedy match.

Stevie is with the guy in women’s clothing but his identity stays a secret.

Queen B vs. Violet vs. Sharon A. Wad vs. Adera James

I have no idea which is which. Wad is the guy. You can figure out what happens here: the man dominates the models (Queen is a Penthouse Pet) until they team up on him and hit three straight Shattered Dreams on him. It’s Danny Dominion in drag apparently. Who is Danny Dominion? I have no idea, nor do I care. Dominion comes back and pounds away as this goes nowhere. Two girls lose their tops and THIS KEEPS GOING. This isn’t wrestling at all and FINALLY James wins. Screw this nonsense.

We hear about some upcoming shows as the cage is lowered. Lawler and JB suck up to the crowd to fill in time.

The Starettes dance AGAIN but Disco interrupts them. He says this is about him instead of dancing girls and comes to the ring. Disco says he should be in this match and he’s not because of the Fruits. They come out and beat Disco up, sending Inferno up the cage in retreat. Disco SHOVES ONE OF THEM OFF THE CAGE in a big bump. The Fruit is pretty much dead so he gets dragged off. This is your time being wasted people, not mine.

WWA World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Road Dogg

Bret comes out to do commentary and they fill even more time with long entrances. Jeff takes Dogg down to start and pounds away in the corner. There’s a cameraman in the ring which is kind of distracting. It also doesn’t help that the closeups show that a lot of the shots aren’t hitting. Dogg hits the shaky punches and knee drop for two. I think you can win by escape too but it’s not really clear.

Dogg gets sent into the cage but he comes back and sends Jeff into it as well. This is as basic as you can get so far but it’s nothing bad. Jeff gets sent into the cage again as Dogg takes over. Both guys go to the top and Jeff climbs down….but that doesn’t count here, making the whole cage pretty worthless. A bell shot busts Jeff open and they head back in for a sleeper from Jarrett. There is literally blood dripping down onto the mat from Jeff’s head. That’s sick stuff man.

Road Dogg gets up at two arm drops and rams Jeff into the cage to escape the hold. Dogg puts on a sleeper of his own but Jeff suplexes him down for two. A forearm from Roadie takes out the referee and Jeff walks out the door to pick up his guitar. The guitar kills Dogg and Jeff puts him in the Sharpshooter but Bret won’t let the bell ring. It’s a cage match so why is this illegal? A second referee comes in and gets bumped and Dogg low blows Jarrett. Now Dogg puts Jeff in the Sharpshooter but Bret STILL won’t ring the bell. Roadie steals the belt from Bret, misses a shot with it and takes the Stroke to give Jeff the title.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work for me. After the night of overdone matches, they overdo it even more to end the show? Even in 2001 the Montreal stuff was old and no one was interested in it anymore. The match was getting good at the end but I don’t think many people bought Dogg as a legit threat.

Post match Bret gets in the cage and Jeff backs down from him. Bret takes the legs out and puts Jeff in the Sharpshooter to end the show. Nice job of making the CHAMPION look good on the first show guys.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade. First and foremost, it’s their first PPV. They had four more and a bunch of house shows to get their ideas right and hopefully ditch some of the comedy matches. The good thing here is they have a champion and it’s probably their best option. This show cost $20 when it aired and I can’t say I’d hate myself for paying that at the time, but I’d be skeptical about paying that again. If nothing else, these guys are WAY better than a lot of indy geeks you’ll see, so it’s not a total loss. Bigger names would come in soon enough though which would help a lot. Not great but not awful.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Back in the 80s, PPV didn’t mean nearly as much as it did today. Until November of 1987, there was only one WWF PPV a year and that was Wrestlemania. Wrestlemania 3 was a huge success and it was clear that Wrestlemania 4 would be big too. Finally it dawned on them: why not do more of these things? Combine that with the idea of getting to air the show at the same time as Jim Crockett’s (basically the NWA owner at that point) Starrcade to screw them over (Vince told the cable companies either carry Survivor Series or you don’t get to carry Wrestlemania), there was no reason to not go with it.

That being said, they needed an idea. Earlier in the year, the WWF had run a few house shows with elimination tag matches as the main event. These shows were huge successes, so why not run a full card of them? Headlined by Team Hogan vs. Team Andre in Andre’s first match since Wrestlemania when he lost to Hogan, plus three other matches headlined by big feuds, you had a solid card all set. Let’s get to it.

Survivor Series 1987

Date: November 26, 1987
Location: Richfield Coliseum, Richfield, Ohio
Attendance: 21,300
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

So we’re here in Richfield, just outside of Cleveland, where the first two of these shows would take place. There are four matches on the card tonight but none of them compare to the main event which has Andre vs. Hogan. The idea is that it gives Andre a chance for revenge and a chance for Hogan to prove that his initial win wasn’t a fluke. This was still the money match in the company so it’s a huge deal. Let’s get to it.

The Fink introduces Jesse and Gorilla which is something you don’t often see anymore.

After a highlight package we’re ready to go.

Gorilla and Jess talk about the whole card, all four matches on it. They also explain the rules, which I’m sure most of you are familiar with. We have ten man (or woman or team) tag team matches and it’s standard elimination rules, meaning you can be out via pin, submission, countout or DQ. Also you can be put out via a referee’s discretion due to injury but that never actually happens as far as I remember.

Team Honky (there’s a name you could never get away with today) is ready for Team Savage and Honky says he’ll shake rattle and roll Elizabeth. He’s already shoved her down which is a big deal as Liz was like the ultimate untouchable woman.

Team Honky Tonk Man vs. Team Randy Savage

Honky Tonk Man, Harley Race, Ron Bass, Danny Davis, Hercules

Randy Savage, Jim Duggan, Ricky Steamboat, Jake Roberts, Brutus Beefcake

Honky doesn’t have Cool Cocky bad as his theme music yet which is a shame. It’s amazing how great the music got in the late 80s. After the heel entrances, Team Savage says they’re here to settle scores. This was a different time as almost all of the faces were friends by default as were the heels just because they were faces and heels. The feuds going into this are Honky vs. Savage and Race vs. Duggan. Other than that the guys are just random midcarders who are faces or heels on a team, which is a pretty cool idea.

The place erupts for Savage’s entrance. Even Jesse couldn’t deny how great Randy was and was a huge fan in his own right. It was clear they had to do something with him soon, and they certainly did soon enough. In the answer to a trivia question, it’s Beefcake vs. Hercules starting the first Survivor Series match ever. Beefcake struts a bit and not much goes on for the first 20 seconds or so.

Hercules (guess what he’s known for) runs Beefcake over but walks into Barber’s sleeper but he falls into his corner to tag in Davis, one of the lowest lever guys you’ll ever find who somehow wasn’t a jobber. He’s a wrestling referee. Seriously, that’s the extent of his gimmick. He’s a referee who cheated a lot and got fired. Savage and Steamboat (who are apparently fine after wanting to kill each other about eight months ago) take turns on Davis but Steamboat misses a charge and it’s off to Race, the current King of the WWF.

Steamboat chops Race in the head and man alive how amazing would those two be able to be in a long old school program? Steamboat skins the cat (I’ve asked this many times, but is that really the best name they could come up with for that? I mean, skinning a cat?) and sends Race to the floor before bringing in Duggan to pound away on Race, knocking him to the floor. Hacksaw heads out with him and they brawl to a double countout, making it 4-4.

Bass (a standard old school cowboy) comes in to face Roberts but it’s quickly off to Savage. A knee sends Bass into the corner and Savage is starting to roll very fast. Savage immediately goes after Honky due to the really bad blood between the two of them and it’s lets Bass get in a shot. Off to the IC Champion (Honky) who gets in some cheap shots but like any good heel, he tags out when Savage starts coming back.

Bass comes in again but a blind tag brings in Barber (Beefcake for you younguns) who hits a high knee for the elimination. Hercules comes in and the bad guys start working over Beefcake’s arm. Off to Honky with an armbar and then right back to Herc. Wisely they’re keeping that schmuck Danny Davis out of there. I guess he’s there because he works for Jimmy Hart but other than that there’s no logical reason for him to be there.

Beefcake tries to punch his way out of trouble but Honky stays on the arm. To say Honky wasn’t much on offense is an understatement as he barely looks to be cranking on the hold at all. Beefcake fights out of the hold but won’t tag because he’s kind of dumb. Davis adds the only thing he’s going to add the whole match and knees Beefcake in the back so that Honky can hit the Shake Rattle and Roll (swinging neckbreaker) for the pin on Beefcake to tie us up at three.

Off to Savage vs. Hercules with the power guy taking over. Davis comes in and things suddenly go downhill for Honky’s team. Yeah, a referee beating on Randy Savage doesn’t work. Who would have guessed? Honky comes in and gets elbowed in the head which lets Savage tag in Jake to pound away. The comeback doesn’t last long though as Jake charges into a boot in the corner and it’s off to Herc. That goes nowhere so here’s Davis and since his offense sucks (BECAUSE HE’S A REFEREE) Jake shrugs it all off and DDTs him to death, making it 3-2 (Savage/Steamboat/Roberts vs. Hercules/Honky).

Herc comes in and takes Jake down and Savage tries to come in for a save, which just allows the heels to double team Jake. Savage isn’t thinking here because of his anger, almost like…..a savage. Oh you’re very clever WWF. Honky hooks a chinlock and Hercules comes in to do the same. Jake hits a jawbreaker to escape and there’s the hot tag to Steamboat who cleans house with chops.

A top rope chop has Herc reeling and it’s off to Savage for the elbow. It’s just Honky left and Savage explodes on him, only to miss another charge (third one for Savage’s team) and let Honky get in some offense. That lasts all of six seconds as the beating continues. Jake comes in and pounds away on him, followed by Savage dropping a double ax. An atomic drop sends Honky to the floor and he’s like screw this and takes the countout. Can you blame him?

Rating: B. This was a really fun match with a good story to it. The fans HATED Honky and the idea of getting him caught at the end with no one to defend him had the fans going nuts. Honky vs. Savage was a great feud but it never had a blowoff due to a bunch of backstage stuff. Honky would somehow hold the title nine more months before perhaps the greatest end to a title run ever at Summerslam. This was a great choice for a first match ever for the concept too as it showed how the idea worked and gave the fans something to cheer about too. Really good stuff.

Heenan and Team Andre can’t wait to get their hands on Hogan. We get a clip from the controversial cover at Wrestlemania 3, which when you look at it, Heenan has a point: the referee wouldn’t have been able to see Hogan’s shoulder get up. The point of this is Hogan is going to be caught against all these monsters and then it’s going to be Andre vs. Hogan and Andre will kill him.

Team Fabulous Moolah vs. Team Sensational Sherri

Fabulous Moolah, Jumping Bomb Angels, Velvet McIntyre, Rockin Robin

Sensational Sherri, Glamour Girls, Dawn Marie, Donna Christianello

Sherri recently took the Women’s Title from Moolah who is certainly on the decline in her career. To be fair she’s 64 years old here and had been champion earlier in the year. The Angels are the kind of a team that would blow have blown up the internet if it had existed back then. They were awesome high fliers and I’ve never seen women like them since. Sherri and Velvet start us off as Jesse talks about being in The Running Man.

Sherri beats on Velvet but a cross body puts her down and it’s off to Moolah. Moolah literally pulls in Christianello and it’s off to a Bomb Angel who comes in with a slingshot kick. Back to Velvet as these girls are tagging in and out fast. Velvet gets a quick victory roll on Donna to eliminate her. She was just filling in a spot so that’s a good elimination to get out of the way. Judy Martin of the Glamour Girls (the Women’s Tag Champions. The titles didn’t last long) comes in followed quickly by Dawn Marie (this one is old. The more famous one would be in high school still at this point) who does nothing of note.

Martin is back in vs. Robin, the half sister of Jake Roberts, but it’s quickly back to Marie who is another filler on the team. Robin quick cross bodies her for the pin and it’s 5-3. It’s Kai vs. Izuki now with Izuki flying all over the place before Matrixing out of a cover. Jesse sounds amazed by her and rightfully so given what women’s wrestling was like at this time. A Sin Cara style armdrag takes Kai down and it’s off to Sherri who gets beaten up as well before it’s off to Robin again.

Robin tries a monkey flip out of the corner but the now legal Martin lands on her. The champ (Sherri in this case) comes in with a quick suplex to put Robin out and get us down to 4-3. Izuki comes in and things speed up again. Martin back in and she spins Izuki around by the hair. FREAKING OW MAN! Off to Moolah who hits a better monkey flip than Robin before getting elbowed down by Martin for two.

Off to the Angel that isn’t Izuki vs. Kai but Non-Izuki misses a dropkick. Moolah literally gets dragged into the ring and starts her very old school slow paced offense. Sherri cheats with Martin on a double clothesline to eliminate Moolah and it’s tied at 3-3. Off to Izuki vs. Martin before it’s quickly back to Non-Izuki. Jesse is thrilled with the idea of all the cheating you could do in this match. Velvet puts on a Boston Crab before shifting to a surfboard. McIntyre pulls Sherri in and Sensational hits a kind of gutwrench suplex which drives Velvet’s neck into the mat and I think somewhat legit hurting her back.

Izuki comes in for a few seconds before it’s back to Velvet and Sherri with Velvet hooking a giant swing. Velvet grabs a victory roll for a quick pin and she looks like she’s in agony. She could barely cradle Sherri’s legs. Off to Izuki as Velvet can’t even stand on the apron. Izuki tries to suplex Martin but she’s just too fat. The third attempt finally works but it only gets two. Izuki hooks a body scissors but gets countered into a slingshot. It’s right into her corner and Velvet comes in, only to get caught in an electric chair drop for the pin.

It’s down to the Glamour Girls vs. the Jumping Bomb Angels and the Angels take over very quickly, with Izuki slingshotting Martin onto Kai. Kai kicks Non-Izuki in the back but misses a splash. Izuki hits a top rope crossbody and it’s down to 2-1. Martin comes in and hits something like Wasteland on Izuki for two. Non-Izuki comes in with a top rope knee and things speed up. Jimmy Hart gets dropkicked and a top rope clothesline by Non-Izuki gets the final pin.

Rating: C+. While it wasn’t as good as the opener, this was still pretty solid stuff. The Angels were AWESOME for their time and were still good by today’s standards. This would set up a title match at the first Royal Rumble with the Angels taking the titles. One important difference between today’s women and this generations: these girls were wrestlers who happened to be female. Today the Divas come off as female wrestlers if that makes sense.

Most of Team Hart Foundation says they’re not worried about Team Strike Force. Jimmy Hart pops in and is all messed up after getting dropped.

The Bolsheviks do the Russian National Anthem deal.

Strike Force and company are ready as well.

Team Hart Foundation vs. Team Strike Force

Hart Foundation, Bolsheviks, Demolition, Dream Team, Islanders

Strike Force, British Bulldogs, Killer Bees, Young Stallions, Fabulous Rougeaus

The rules here are that if one member of a team is eliminated, both members are out so it’s still just five eliminations needed. Strike Force recently stunned the Harts for the titles. I think you should know every team here. The Dream Team is Greg Valentine and Dino Bravo and the Stallions are Jim Powers and Paul Roma. I’m a big Strike Force fan so it’s good to see the fans pop loudly for them.

I’ve seen this show many times as it was one of my favorite tapes but I’ve never figured something out: for this and the main event, the lights are turned down. Why would that be the case? It’s clearly darker in the arena now and it’s not a dome with sunlight coming in or anything. I’ve never gotten that. Volkoff and Martel start things off. There are so many people on the apron that you can’t see most of the ring from a standard camera shot.

Volkoff powers him down to start before bringing in Zhukov. Since Zhukov is pretty much worthless, Martel beats him up and brings in Santana for the forearm out of nowhere for the quick pin. Santana’s reward for the pin: he gets to fight Ax. Ax does his pounding but knocks Tito into the corner and it’s off to Jacques Rougeau who speeds things up with a jumping back elbow to take over.

Dino Bravo comes in and the good guys start speeding up their tags. I’m sorry for all of the play by play in this but when you have 18 guys in a match there isn’t much room for analysis or anything else. After Bravo gets beaten up by about five different guys we wind up with Smash vs. Dynamite and the Bulldog (Dynamite) gets caught in the heel corner. Well actually it would be the heel side of the ring because they don’t all fit in one corner but corner sounds better.

Off to Haku and they chop it out before Dynamite tags in a Killer Bee who tags in the other Killer Bee. Neidhart comes in and gets his legs stretched by Brunzell and Roma. Back to Smash and then Ax who beat on the (somehow) future Horseman. I’m not listing a lot of the tags as there are probably five of them a minute and there’s no point in listing off stuff like “Ax comes in and hits Roma once before tagging back out.”

Roma tags in Powers who gets beaten down just as fast as Roma did, so it’s off to Jacques again. Not that it matters much as Jacques misses a cross body and Smash gets a quick pin. That’s good as we’re now down to sixteen guys left in the match. Off to Dynamite vs. Tama but Powers comes in, only to hesitate and gets his head taken off by a clothesline. Neidhart comes in and puts him in an over the shoulder powerbomb position as Haku drops a double ax (is there a single ax?) to the chest.

Off to Roman who gets beaten up by Ax and then Valentine. The Stallions are jobbers for all intents and purposes but they were great at selling so there was a point to having them around. Bravo comes in and hits a gutwrench suplex for two. Roma crawls over and brings in a Killer Bee who tags out to Dynamite almost immediately to face Smash. Smash fires off something similar to Sheamus’ ten forearms but shoves the referee, drawing the DQ to knock out Demolition. Notice that they kept Demolition VERY strong here and didn’t let them get pinned.

Bret immediately comes in and piledrives Dynamite for only two. Jesse immediately starts singing Bret’s praises as he was known to do. Bret misses a charge and hits the post shoulder first and it’s off to Powers again to face Tama. Tama misses a Vader Bomb and there’s the tag to Martel. Rick cleans house but when he puts the Boston Crab on he’s too close to the ropes and Neidhart gets a tag.

Rick gets away enough to bring in Santana who hits the forearm almost immediately for two. The saving shot to the back of Santana’s head by Bret is enough for Neidhart to get a pin and eliminate the champions. To recap, we have the Harts, the Dream Team and the Islanders vs. the Bulldogs, the Stallions and the Bees. At least now things can slow down a lot. Haku hits a HIGH dropkick on Powers as Jesse talks about his great great grandfather coming over on the Mayflower.

Valentine comes in and does Arn Anderson’s jump in the air and get crotched spot. Anvil (Neidhart for you schmucks out there) comes in and hot shots Powers followed by a superkick from Haku. Off to Valentine who has his suplex countered but still blocks the tag by bringing in Hitman. Bret suplexes Powers but Roma is still able to get the tag somehow. Back to Valentine who comes off the middle rope with a shot to the back for two.

In something you rarely see, Bret whips Roma into the ropes and knocks Valentine off the apron. Bret misses a dropkick and there’s the tag to Dynamite. A belly to back gets two for the Kid and it’s off to Roma which is a pretty questionable move given the beating he’s taken. Off to Haku vs. Blair as Roma was only in for a few seconds. Davey comes in and it’s power vs. power. Make that power vs. Powers but Jim misses a corner charge and Haku tags Anvil.

Powers dives away from Bret and it’s time for Davey Boy vs. Bret in a Summerslam 92 preview. Davey uses a perfect gorilla press on Hart and hits the powerslam for two on Haku. Dynamite tries a middle rope headbutt (notice all the similarities between Dynamite and Benoit. Benoit basically cloned himself after Dynamite) on Haku but knocks himself silly, allowing Haku to superkick him for the elimination.

It’s 3-2 now and Roma immediately charges in with a dropkick for two. Off to Bravo who misses an elbow and it’s off to Powers. Why won’t they tag the Bees already? Valentine Hammers away on Powers as do both Harts. Valentine comes in for a second before handing it off to Bravo again. Dino hits his side suplex but tags off to Valentine for the Figure Four, which is countered by a kick to the back. Off to Roma who sunset flips Valentine off the top to make it 2-2 (Stallions/Bees vs. Islanders/Harts).

The Bees double team Anvil in a match that by their own words probably happened 300 times over the years. Brunzell hits a high knee to the face for two and it’s off to Bret who does about as well. Tama comes in and takes out Roma and it’s off to Haku. Haku misses a legdrop and it’s back to Brunzell. Brunzell hiptosses him into the heel corner for some reason and Bret comes back in. Roma gets two off a middle rope fist but Hart comes right back with a belly to back suplex.

The Islanders hit a double headbutt and this referee counts SLOW. Haku pounds on Roma and hits a dropkick which is rather impressive for a guy his size. It’s not quite as impressive as Anvil doing a dropkick of his own (literally 2 seconds after Monsoon says he’d like to see Neidhart try one) though. Bret comes back in and Roma slides between Bret’s legs and tags in Brunzell.

Brunzell tries to slam Hart but Tama dropkicks Bret’s back. Brunzell rolls through and gets a fast pin to eliminate the Harts and get us down to 2-1. Tama hooks a nerve hold on Brunzell followed by a shoulderbreaker from Haku. That gets two so Haku puts on a nerve hold of his own. Now Tama puts on ANOTHER nerve hold. To be fair we’re over half an hour into this so the guys are likely getting tired.

Brunzell tries a sunset flip but there’s no strength in it at all and he only gets two. He FINALLY gets a tag off to Powers who tags in Roma for a powerslam for two. Things start to break down a bit and the Bees being in the ring allow the Islanders to double team Roma a bit. Roma escapes enough to tag Blair but Tama kicks him before Blair can even get in. Tama misses an elbow and it’s off to Brunzell again for some reason. He can barely get Tama over for a backdrop but the signature dropkick gets two. Everything breaks down and Blair puts on his mask (it was a thing the Bees did to cheat) and sunset flips Tama for the pin.

Rating: C-. This match just kept going on and on and it was kind of exhausting to sit through. It runs nearly forty minutes and by the end there were no combinations we hadn’t seen already. You could easily cut out fifteen minutes of this match and it would have improved greatly. If you like tag wrestling, find a copy of this NOW but otherwise be ready to fast forward a lot. It’s not a bad match or anything but man alive is it long.

We get a clip of Ted Dibiase in his limo, bragging about how he’s going to spend Thanksgiving planning his next move. It takes money to survive, not toughness. We get some highlights of DiBiase humiliating some fans for money, including making a woman get on all four’s and bark like a dog. One of the fans shown here would one day become WWE Champion and is more famously known as Rob Van Dam. We also see DiBiase buying out a pool for the day so he can use it for himself. Alberto Del Rio wishes he could do this a quarter as well as DiBiase can.

Here’s Honky Tonk who now has Cool Cocky Bad. Odd. He says he wasn’t beaten and everyone saw it. He’ll take a challenge from anyone, and that includes Hogan. We’re clearly on intermission here.

Team Andre the Giant vs. Team Hulk Hogan

Andre the Giant, King Kong Bundy, One Man Gang, Butch Reed, Rick Rude

Hulk Hogan, Bam Bam Bigelow, Don Muraco, Ken Patera, Paul Orndorff

After Andre’s team comes out, we go to the back for a great late 80s Hogan insane promo. He talks about how hungry all of his team is and apparently he trusts Orndorff again. Muraco is subbing for an injured Billy Graham who would never wrestle again if I remember correctly. To say the place erupts for Hogan is an understatement. Muraco and Rude get things going here. Again there aren’t many feuds going on here other than Hogan vs. Andre. Rude and Orndorff are feuding but other than that I don’t think there were any established programs already.

Rude gets knocked into the corner and quintuple teamed before it’s off to Orndorff for the tag. Paul knocks him around a bit and here’s Hogan to blow the roof off the place again. He drops a bunch of elbows on Rude and here’s Bigelow with a splash for no cover. Bigelow gorilla presses Rude and here’s Patera who never got back to where he was before his jail stint.

Off to Reed who has about as much luck as Rude had earlier. Muraco comes in and dropkicks Reed down as does Orndorff. Paul beats on him for a bit and it’s a double clothesline from Hogan and Orndorff, leading to the big leg and a 5-4 lead for Hogan and company. Andre comes in while Hogan is celebrating, but Joey Marella (Gorilla’s adopted son) says a high five to Patera counted as a tag so the teasing of the crowd continues.

Andre, the Frenchman that he is, thinks Patera is beneath him and tags out to Bundy. Patera clotheslines Bundy down but King tags in Gang to beat on Orndorff. Paul is all like BRING IT ON and punches Gang in the head, only to charge into a knee in the corner to bring him right back down. Off to Rude who gets his own head taken off by a clothesline. It’s been ALL Hulk N Pals so far.

Rude pokes Muraco in the eye and it’s off to Gang, but OMG misses a splash in the corner. Patera gets in and pounds away on Gang even more with right hands and a knee in the corner. Gang goes to the eyes which of course makes Jesse happy. Patera tries to fight back but they clothesline each other and Gang falls on top of him for the pin, making it 4-4. Hogan comes in immediately to take over but quickly brings in Bam Bam for a double big boot.

Bigelow is probably the second most popular guy in the company at this point or third at worst behind only Hogan and Savage. They hit head to head and it’s a double tag to Rude and Orndorff. Paul goes nuts on him but as he loads up the piledriver, Bundy jumps him from behind, giving Rude a quick rollup pin. That would be it for Orndorff in the WWF, at least in major spots.

Bigelow comes in and suplexes Rude down before tagging out to Hogan for a high knee (!). A powerslam from Muraco to take Rude out and it’s Gang, Bundy and Andre vs. Bigelow, Hogan and Muraco. Muraco goes after Bundy’s leg which is pretty good strategy. Granted it doesn’t work but at least it was a good idea. Gang comes in and Muraco can’t slam him because he’s really fat. The splash eliminates Muraco and it’s 3-2.

Gang vs. Bigelow now with Bigelow trying a sunset flip, only to get crushed by the power of fat. Bundy clotheslines Bigelow inside out and Jesse says Hogan is going to run if Bigelow gets eliminated. Gorilla RUNS to Hogan’s defense and Jesse freaks. Gang and Bigelow collide and Hogan looks like he’s about to cry. Andre finally comes in and Bigelow looks TINY compared to him.

Bigelow slides between Andre’s legs and FINALLY it’s Hogan vs. Andre. Hogan pounds away and blocks a headbutt and Andre is in trouble. Hogan decks Bundy and Gang before elbowing Andre in the head. Bundy pulls Hogan to the floor and Hulk has to beat up both of the other monsters. He slams both guys, but he’s outside too long and Hogan is counted out. Hogan, the great sportsman that he is, gets back in anyway and is STUNNED, yes STUNNED I SAY about getting counted out. It takes the referees saying that if Hogan doesn’t leave, his whole team is disqualified.

So it’s Bigelow vs. Andre, Bundy and Gang. Bigelow starts with Bundy and clotheslines him down for two. A shoulder block puts Bundy down again and a headbutt gets two. A dropkick staggers Bundy and the King misses a splash. Bigelow hits his slingshot splash to eliminate Bundy and make it 2-1.

Gang comes in immediately and starts pounding away, hooking something like a front facelock. Bigelow gets rammed into Andre’s boot and Gang goes up. Oh this can’t end well. Gang misses a “splash” and Bigelow pins him to get us down to one on one. Let the pain begin. Andre pounds him down, avoids a charge, fires off a bunch of shoulders to the back, and a kind of single arm butterfly suplex gets the final pin for Andre.

Rating: B-. For a main event, this was perfectly fine. More than anything else, it continues Hogan vs. Andre. They had their first match about eight months ago and something like this needed to happen to extend the feud. That’s the reason for the amount of PPVs going up: you need another place to have major feuds. Andre has now won something in direct competition over Hogan and there’s a reason for a rematch. Maybe on February 5^th live on NBC?

Hogan IMMEDIATELY runs out and decks Andre with the belt. Hogan clears the ring and says bring it on, but Heenan motions that Hogan has to sign a contract first. Jesse freaks out as Hogan poses. This is a total jerk move by Hulk as he lost completely fairly and is out here because he can’t accept it. I was a Hulkamaniac as a kid, but Hogan was a horrible sport a lot of the time.

Heenan and Andre say they want Hogan and all Hulk has to do is sign on the dotted line.

Overall Rating: B+. This is a pretty excellent show and a GREAT first entry in the series. However I would certainly suggest going with the home video version instead of the full version as it clips some of the repetitive stuff from the tag match which helps it a lot. It also cuts some promos like the DiBiase thing and makes the show a lot easier to sit through. Still though, good show here and well worth seeing.

In something that I’ll be doing with all of these redos, here are the original ratings and the new ratings. I haven’t looked at these until the end of the redo. In order of airing (just captains listed for the sake of less typing):

Ratings Comparison

Team Randy Savage vs. Team Honky Tonk Man

Original: B+

Redo: B

Team Sherri Martel vs. Team Fabulous Moolah

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Team Hart Foundation vs. Team Strike Force

Original: B

Redo: C-

Team Hogan vs. Team Andre the Giant

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Apparently I liked most of the matches less and the show a bit less overall but still good marks all around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/06/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1987-it-all-begins-in-ohio/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

No Way Out 2000
Date: February 27, 2000
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 12,551
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is more or less about one thing: Hell in a Cell. If Cactus Jack loses, he retires. Other than that there isn’t a lot to talk about. Oh actually there is. At the Rumble, Big Show had been thrown out but claimed that Rock was out first. Tonight there’s a match where the winner goes to Mania. The Radicals are here now also so we have a fully fleshed out roster for this era. This is a direct request from X and others so let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about Foley vs. HHH as Foley’s dream is to go to Mania. This was a very emotional time actually as honestly no one was sure what was going to happen since more or less no one believed they would retire Foley without letting him main event Mania. On the other hand though, there was little belief they would do a title change. Also there was no way of knowing what the main event at Mania would be. This was a very interesting time indeed.

Intercontinental Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Jericho

Angle is European Champion here but it’s not on the line. Jericho is IC Champion and has Chyna with him. She has that giant phallic gun with her. I wonder if she was trying to say that yes, I am indeed a man with that. Jericho gets a GREAT pop. Please Vince, give us a Jericho title run with him as a face.

Angle is apparently an idiot, an ignoramus, and an imbecile. Jericho has an I of his own: the Intercontinental Title. That’s simple but the delivery is what makes it. Naturally this starts off fast paced as the Attitude Era was still around for the most part. Meaning of course, we go to the floor.

These two plus Benoit always had mad chemistry together and it was clear they were the future. Well kind of I guess. Jericho was. Benoit….maybe. Angle is hard to place in a pantheon of greatness. Crowd starts an ANGLE SUCKS chant. That’s ahead of its time as Edge hasn’t started the more famous chants yet.

I know I haven’t given much commentary here, but dude, it’s Angle vs. Jericho. Do I need to tell you that this match is awesome? Jericho hits that spinning heel kick that he does quite well at. In a lucky botch, Jericho messes up the follow through on the forearm but he landed on Angle so it looked intentional.

As Ventura said, sometimes it’s better to be lucky that good. They go into some swank submission vs. pinfall stuff and it’s sweet stuff. Angle gets the Slam out of nowhere when it was A, still a legit finisher (ankle lock was still about 5 months away) and B, MUCH faster and harder, gets two. We get a Liontamer which shifts into the Walls. Angle goes to get a belt and swings at Chyna. She gets rammed into the steps.

I’m no doctor but it seems to be a bad case of dramatic convenience. My diagnosis would be a short apology to Jericho. Possible side effects include a brief bit of jobbing. Take a Lionsault and call me in the morning. Back in the ring, Angle gets the belt up to block the Lionsault for the pin and the title to make him the 2nd Eurocontinental Champion. Another referee comes down to do nothing of note.

Rating: B+. This is another pairing that gets a higher than normal starting grade. Just based on who they are, they get an automatic B. This was a very nice opener as you have two guys that you know can go and it worked out fine. Again though like I’ve said before, it’s Angle vs. Jericho. Did you expect anything worse than a good match?

The Dudleys say there will be another title change tonight. This was when the Dudleys were still insanely awesome.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. New Age Outlaws

So the Outlaws are more or less the biggest team ever at this point and this is just another title defense against the Dudleys who took the company by storm. Think Sheamus vs. Cena from TLC. Lawler randomly barking at Road Dogg is rather funny for some reason. After the normal intros we start with a big brawl of course.

The crowd is pretty hot but you can tell they’re saving themselves for the main event. Billy beat Bubba on Thursday and put him through a table. Road Dogg does his dancing punch and Bubba does what someone with intelligence would do (the irony of that stuns me) and DUCKS.

We get a What’s Up but it’s not named yet. This match is very short, as in like 5 minutes long. The Dudleys dominate for the most part until the required big brawl at the end. On the floor, Bubba blasts Gunn in the arm with a pipe. That legitimately injured him, putting him out of action for about 8 months.

When he got back Road Dogg was with K-Kwik (R-Truth) and Gunn got a singles push. Therefore unless there was some random reunion, this is the last New Age Outlaws match. Bubba realizes something is wrong and runs into the ring for 3D and the tag titles. This was a legit shock as more or less NO ONE thought the Dudleys had a chance.

Rating: D+. Way too short to be much of anything which I’m pretty sure was because of the injury. That happens so you do what you have to do. This would set up the triple ladder match at Mania and the first TLC match at Summerslam as wrestling started the HOLY CRAP period of gimmick matches. Yes I know ECW did them first but theirs were far sloppier and became clichéd. Ok to revise it so I don’t get yelled at: the holy crap period started in the mainstream. There.

Apparently Billy was hurt coming in and got hurt worse during the match. Got it.

We get a short package on Mark Henry vs. Viscera. Oh dang it they’re fighting over Mae being pregnant and Viscera hurting her. For those of you that don’t know about this angle, consider yourselves VERY lucky. If you ever hear a joke about a hand, this is what we’re talking about. We’ll leave it at that.

Mark Henry vs. Viscera

Be quick I beg of you. They flat out say this isn’t going to be a pretty match with JR mentioning the star system. They destroy the steps with Henry taking a beating. Yeah I don’t care either. We get references to babies and I change the subject immediately. Basically Henry is getting destroyed. And here’s Mae Young for the save. After she gets shoved down, Henry hits a shoulder block which Viscera gets up from first, and a slam, yes a slam I say, gets the pin. What were they freaking thinking here?????

Rating: F-. Oh do I really need to explain this?

Jericho says he’s mad at Angle, not Chyna. Dang I want to see that sweet triple threat from Mania now.

Gunn’s shoulder is still hurt.

Hardy Boys vs. Edge/Christian

Again, do I need to tell you that this is going to be good? Terri bought the APA to protect her from the Dudleys earlier. I guess the tag team she has already, the Hardys, aren’t good enough? Both teams are faces here. I love Edge and Christian’s music. Edge jumps Jeff to start.

At least you can tell the Hardys apart now as they’re wearing different colors shirts. Has anyone ever adjusted their set before? Is there a need to tell fans not to do that? The shirts go off and the fans cheer. They need Lita badly, they really do. She’ll hook up with them in about 3 months.

The Hardys are seeming a bit heelish here but they’re wildly popular so there we are. These four were in an 8 man tag on Smackdown which apparently makes them familiar with each other. Yeah that’s stupid. In a nice spot, Christian does a drop toe hold on Edge into Matt’s groin.

Lawler asks where Edge was aiming. JR: THE GROIN! It’s funnier than it sounds. Edge gets a nice piledriver on Jeff but it’s not Memphis so it just gets two. It’s a more solid match than I’m making it out to be. It’s nothing great but all four guys are hustling and it’s coming off good. You have to remember this is a fresh match at this point so it’s far more interesting.

It’s so weird to think that Edge and Hardy would be having world title matches in like 9 years. We get the double tag to Christian and Matt Hardy as this match is getting some solid time. In a slick spot, Edge is on Matt’s shoulders with Christian behind them. Jeff jumps over Edge as he hooks a victory roll and lands on Christian in a cross body for a double cover. SWEET. Poetry in Motion is countered into a spear. This is awesome stuff.

Terri turns on Jeff and shoves him off the top rope for no apparent reason. She slaps Matt and the move that will become known as the Unprettier gets the pin. It’s weird seeing all these moves with no names. Apparently Terri wants to join Edge and Christian. They leave her. That made them number one contenders I guess. Yeah the APA did absolutely nothing here. Matt goes after Terri and NOW the APA do something.

Rating: B+. Just like the opener, this was solid stuff. This was over fifteen minutes of awesome though so I was very happy. Solid stuff all around with four guys that were taking the tag division to new levels that hadn’t been seen in about 15 years. Great match.

Edge and Christian show some signs of issues but they’re happy they’re going to Mania for the title shot.

Show is will Lillian. She BARELY comes up to his chest. He says he should be going to Mania and we see Rock’s feet hitting first again. That’s really impressive when you think about it.

Big Bossman vs. Tazz

Yeah remember when Bossman was fighting for the world title two months ago? Neither do I. Bossman and Albert jumped him on Heat for no apparent reason. Taz is still over at this point and was supposed to get Benoit’s push but Hardcore Holly screwed up a spot at Mania and put Taz on the shelf. They start in the aisle of course. Taz hooks an armbar on the floor. He’s a submission master at this point also.

MAYBE a minute in Taz gets the Tazmission and Bossman is more or less done so Albert makes the save. A nightstick attack follows. Was there a point anywhere near this? Tazz keeps fighting back. If you want to make him look tough, have Tazz destroy both guys in a minute or so. Seriously, I have NO CLUE what the point of this was. Boss Man breaks the nightstick over Tazz’s head. This went nowhere that I remember. Tazz gets up AGAIN as this isn’t making him look awesome or anything. It’s freaking stupid at this point.

Rating: W. For WTF was that???

Angle is in the cheap seats celebrating with a bullhorn.

We recap Kane vs. X-Pac because the massacre at Armageddon wasn’t enough to blow off the feud I guess. This was one of the feuds that made X-Pac so hated. It just kept going on this theory that Pac could fight a monster. I mean this angle went on for about 6 months.

For those that haven’t read my Armageddon review, Kane DESTROYED Pac in a cage match. If that had ended the feud, it would have been ok. They kept it going though with Tori, Kane’s girlfriend, left him for X-Pac. It’s a great example of an angle that went on too long. Oh and Paul Bearer is back.

Kane vs. X–Pac

It’s No Holds Barred. We get a clip of Kane being hit with a flamethrower. You know Kane, maybe when you see a guy that hates you holding A BIG METAL GUN, you shouldn’t stand in front of him. Kane is in the reversed color outfit here, making him look awesome again. Yes I’m a big Kane mark so there you go.

They fight up by the entrance where there’s a random metal garbage can. Does anyone actually have those? We have big green plastic ones. It’s a total brawl so far which at least makes sense with the stipulation. We get Bearer vs. Tori. Ok then. Pac is wrestling in a t-shirt which is gone by the time that line is typed.

Bronco Buster hits. I hate that move. That’ll end that. X Factor barely keeps Kane down. That could have something to do with the fact that it ABSOLUTELY SUCKS. Top rope clothesline looks awesome. Chokeslam hits and you can feel Tori coming. Yep there it is. She gets a tombstone and Kane picks up the stairs for no adequately explored reason. They’re kicked into his face for the pin. The blowoff for this was of all things Rikishi and Kane vs. Pac and Road Dogg. Yeah it was an odd pick, but so was all of Mania 2000.

Rating: C+. Not bad for a brawl, but still there was no point to this after Armageddon. I mean Kane beating up Pac is always fun, but the angle just makes limited sense to me. Bearer was worthless here so at least some things never change. It’s not bad, but at the same time you scratch your head over it.

The Radicalz are ready for their PPV debut. Eddie is hurt here after shattering his arm in his WWF debut. They all say something. This is rather worthless.

Too Cool/Rikishi vs. Radicalz

It’s Benoit, Saturn and Malenko in case you weren’t around at this point. Rikishi hadn’t quite gotten to his mega push yet but it was coming. It sucked beyond belief, but it was coming. Guerrero has a lead pipe for no apparent reason and gets beaten up before the match starts. Saturn and Grandmaster start us off. Why do I get the idea that these three guys are just not good enough to be in there with Benoit and Malenko?

Rikishi has a bad leg here so the Radicalz show intelligence by GOING AFTER IT. Seriously, why do wrestlers have such issues with figuring that out? There’s a nice dichotomy here with three well schooled and master technicians vs. three more or less comedy characters that are ok in the ring. That’s rather interesting when you think of it.

Rikishi is rather over if nothing else. That Rikishi Driver of his is just awesome. It looks freaking devastating if nothing else. It connects on Saturn and we get the Worm. We hit the messy stage which was destined to happen here so there we are. Saturn takes ANOTHER finisher, this time the guillotine leg drop from Grandmaster. Benoit hits the headbutt for the save and everyone goes to the floor. The Driver hits on Malenko and the visual of him just stopping is great. A Banzai Drop ends it. Naturally we dance for a bit.

Rating: B-. This match worked for one reason: Too Cool and Rikishi just wrestled for the most part. It wasn’t about comedy or a stupid gimmick or anything like that. It was a six man tag match and it came off pretty well. At the end of the day, good old fashioned wrestling is going to work better than anything else. This match right here is pretty much proof of that. It’s not great, but given who was on the face side, this was great.

Angle is STILL celebrating. The early months of his career were just freaking epic.

We recap Rock vs. Big Show which is very simple: Rock was out at the Rumble but got the win anyway. The match is for the title shot. Simple yet effective, and brilliantly done.

Big Show vs. The Rock

This is around the time when Show was still pretty good. If you’ve never seen it, go check out his 95/96 stuff. He’s a totally different guy than he is now and the difference is staggering. Rock gets a great pop as the super-push continues. Here’s something you likely wouldn’t guess: Show is just three months older than Rock. I NEVER would have guessed that.

Show has been around forever but he’s only 37. That’s hard to believe. He debuted when he was 23. That’s amazing. He really was a big deal when he jumped I guess as while he was a former WCW Champion, his reigns never were very big deals.

Granted they weren’t in WWF either. We’re on the floor now which is fine for a match this big. Show gets a press slam and drops Rock on the railing. That would HURT. After standard stuff between these two, another referee comes down, followed by Shane. Rock Bottom hits but Shane knocks Rock out with the chair, turning heel and siding with Show. That’s enough for the pin and the Mania title shot. That kind of happened, but not quite as you likely know.

Rating: B-. Not bad but really more advancing a story than about the match. Rock was about as hot as anyone on the planet at this point though so this was just continuing that hot streak as it wasn’t bad at all. Show winning was a real surprise though so I have to give them credit for that one.

We recap HHH vs. Cactus. You know the story, but more or less they’re feuding and it’s Title vs. Career. HHH said Foley could have any match he wanted, but if Foley lost he was done. When Foley said Hell in a Cell, the arena lit up. After the street fight classic they had, everyone knew this was going to be epic.

Angle, singing We Are the Champions, is thrown into a car trunk by Jericho and Chyna. That’s just awesome. The song not the beating.

WWF Title: Cactus Jack vs. HHH

In case you’re a freaking idiot, remember that this is Hell in a Cell. Seriously, why does Fink have to announce that? Here’s a hint: BIG FREAKING CAGE! The cage coming down over them is just epic. Oh there’s a subplot here: Cactus swore he would jump off the top of the cage but the Cell is HEAVILY locked. Here we go. Jack starts off in control here and hits a running jumping forearm. Yeah I was shocked too.

It should be noted that the crowd is kind of into this but not really at all. In his book, Foley mentions this and thought it was a sign that no one cared about him possibly being gone forever. Foley’s shirt is really torn already. On the floor, HHH gets the steps ready for the running step spot. However, he doesn’t hit it. HE FREAKING THROWS THEM AT FOLEY! That was just AWESOME looking.

The fans think Stephanie is a sl**, but still are relatively quiet. Chair time. In a funny moment, HHH takes a shot to the balls with a chair and Lawler says STEPHANIE! Double Arm DDT on a chair for a long two and….NO REACTION. Spinebuster on the chair and HHH gets two.

Foley said he was panicking here as he thought they were just failing in the eyes of the fans. They’re not dead silent but one of Jack’s finishers on a chair got a whimper. On the floor Foley gets a nice slingshot to send HHH into the cage. And now it’s Foley cranking it up. It’s been a very back and forth match and HHH is busted.

Foley does the chair dive off the middle rope to the floor and the fans are waking up. Seriously we’re about ten minutes in and they’re just NOW waking up. Foley picks up the steps and throws them at HHH (nice bit of continuity there) and HHH ducks (nice psychology there). He misses though and it hits the cage, breaking it. The roof is officially blown off. In his book, Foley said it hit him all at once: the fans were smart.

They knew the match wasn’t ending in the cage. They knew Foley and HHH were going to fight all over ringside including likely going to the top of the Cell. That makes a ton of sense. If you know the match isn’t going to end in the ring, why really care that much? In short, they didn’t. They were just waiting for Foley to find a way out of the cage and he just did.

We hit the floor and Cactus hits a piledriver on the table. A huge Foley chant starts up and Cactus starts climbing with HHH still on the table. Fans are WAY into it now. Stephanie makes the save just before Foley finds the 2×4 in barbed wire. Oh yes. A quick shot to the head and Foley is dominating. And HHH is climbing the cage out of fear of Foley. The crowd is losing it. Oh and the 2×4 is up there too.

Foley has his hands on top but HHH slams Foley’s head into the 2×4, and we get AIR FOLEY as he falls through the, say it with me, SPANISH ANNOUNCE TABLE! He gets up before HHH can get down the cage. HHH is STUNNED. Foley tries to throw a chair up top but he can’t get it up. That’s an odd segment but for some reason it’s interesting. He gets to the top but walks into a barbed wire shot. Everyone is just waiting for the big spot here. Everything up there is terrifying as you never know what’s going to happen.

The corner of the cage breaks and HHH nearly falls through. We get a suplex on the top of the cage. Foley gets the 2×4 again, and in the words of Bubba Dudley from Rise and Fall of ECW, “Why don’t we just light it on fire?” The fans have NO idea what to think of this but they love it. He lays it on the Cell and gives a sign for a piledriver. It’s reversed and Foley goes through the Cell and THROUGH THE RING.

Remember, that’s from a good 12-15 feet up. HHH gets down and CACTUS GETS UP. HHH loses his mind over that and beats him down again. Pedigree hits and that’s finally it. DANG . Back in the day, especially after Show won, there was NO predicting who would win this. Epic match. Foley gets the big sendoff, and while he would get a reward of being in the main event of Mania, not even he knew that at the time. If I remember right he found out a week before the PPV, so it was a legit shock.

Rating: A+. It never ceases to amaze me how they find new ways to use the Cell. First it was Taker stalking Shawn, then it was a total eruption, and now a hybrid where Foley is this unstoppable monster in there with HHH afraid to fight but it’s a massacre anyway. Either way, this was a great match with Foley going out in a classic, jobbing like he did better than anyone else. Excellent match with a great ending and some GREAT spots. The pops were off the charts and the whole thing is just great.

Overall Rating: A. I was about to push the – key but I couldn’t do it. This is a VERY good show all around. There are some bad spots like the Taz beating and the battle of the fat boys but they’re a combined 8 minutes max so how much can I complain? Some very good matches, but this is one of those shows where you get more than the matches add up to.

There’s a feeling here that it’s hard to describe, but you’ll know it if you see the show. Of the matches with meaning, there aren’t any bad ones. Easily worth seeing and a very good show that I enjoyed a lot.

 Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

This is something I’ve said for years but it was very true last night:Sometimes the solution to all of the problems with your stories and your angles and everything else that is going wrong is to just have a good wrestling match.  Last night everything was going bad, the stories weren’t clicking and I was just not caring at all about the show.  Then Bryan vs. Ziggler happened and I had a new spirit for the show.  Granted after that it was quickly crushed again, but it helped a lot for awhile and it can help almost every time.

When all else fails, have a good wrestling match.  It’ll help.