Impact Wrestling
Date: July 26, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

After last week’s Aces and 8’s show, it should be interesting to see what the retaliation is tonight. We’ll have a ton of BFG Series matches I’m sure, plus some other stuff if they have time. That’s the one issue with the Series: it takes up SO much time on every show that there isn’t much room for anything else. The good thing is that the matches aren’t bad so it’s not like it’s torture. Let’s get to it.

We open with the usual recap from last week.

Tonight it’s Storm vs. Styles and Ray vs. Angle. Also Chavo debuts.

Here’s Sting to open things up. Dixie has named him the interim GM until Hogan is back, so his first act is to call out Aces and 8’s, even though he’s alone. Instead he gets Aries, who says if Aces and 8’s jumps anyone, he’ll jump on them. Here’s Angle who was beaten down last week by Aces and 8’s as well. He says they tried to cost him a world title shot so he wants them too.

Now cue Roode who says he isn’t here with them but he’s here announce that he knows who is behind Aces and 8’s. The mic goes out so Angle gives Roode his own mic. It’s someone who has been in the world title picture for a year and is jealous of both Roode and Angle: the Cowboy James Storm. Storm charges out and jumps Roode. Tehy brawl into the ring while the other three guys let it go. Angle finally breaks it up and Roode leaves. Roode says the truth hurts and we go to a break.

People talk about Chavo debuting tonight.

Post break Roode yells about it being Storm. He takes his bags and leaves as Jason Hervey is apparently the interviewer.

Madison Rayne/Gail Kim vs. Mickie James/Tara

It’s been too long since Mickie has been on my TV. Next week these four are in a fourway for the #1 contender shot. Tara and Gail start with a fight over arm control. Off to Mickie for a low dropkick that gets two. There’s the Thesz Press to Gail and it’s off to Madison who looks GREAT in that blue number.

Madison does little of note and it’s off to Tara to clean house. She hits the spinning side slam for two and it’s off to Mickie. The good chicks hit a cool double rolling mat slam into a double half crab. Gail tries a double dropkick and gets caught in the same hold. Madison is with Earl Hebner though and Mickie rolls Madison up for the pin at 3:51. But Madison gets the win instead. Yep this is the angle they’re giving the Knockouts now. They made a point to show that Mickie’s shoulder was off the mat.

Rating: D+. The ending makes me hate this division all over again. Why in the world would we want to see Earl Hebner get a storyline? BECAUSE IT’S WACKY!!! These four have a fourway next week and I’d bet the ending is going to be the same thing. For the life of me I don’t get who thinks this is a good idea.

Sting tells Aries to make some cuts to the X-Division. You know, right after they were introduced a few weeks ago.

Sam Shaw says he loves this business.

More people talk about Chavo. Ray: “Didn’t I tell you never to bother me when I’m on my Twitter machine?”

Gut Check: Sam Shaw vs. Douglas Williams

Shaw is a smaller guy and a high flier. There are people with signs that say 87, which means Joey Ryan. Shaw controls the early stuff here but there’s a camera on the crowd so you know something is coming. Shaw hits an Orton backbreaker and goes up top. Some people come out as Shaw is slammed off the top rope. Here’s Ryan who hits security and runs. Apparently he hit Snow. Williams kills Shaw with a clothesline and pounds away before hitting Rolling Chaos for the pin at 2:38. Ryan was the bigger focus here but Shaw looked better than any Gut Check guy so far as far as almost winning. The judging is tonight.

Aries is with the X guys and they all do the reality show stuff, saying they should get the X Title shot. Ion comes in and brags a bit before leaving. Aries cuts Rashad Cameron. I think this is just about who gets the title match and that these guys aren’t fired or anything like that. We have King, Darsow and Dutt left as contenders.

More Chavo stuff. This is some of the biggest hype I’ve seen in a long time.

Here’s Chavo in a suit. He says he’s humbled to be here because the Guerrero Family has conquered everything. They’ve been champions everywhere they’ve been except for here in TNA. He says timing is everything and people need to remember this time and date. It’s Guerrero Time. Good debut speech.

Chavo wraps it up but Kid Kash and Gunner come out. Kash lists off all of Chavo’s family members who have been wrestlers. He wants to know where Chavo’s uncle Hector is and suggests that Hector is too drunk. Chavo jumps them and gets beaten down until Hernandez makes the save.

Angle asks Storm if he’s involved with Aces and 8’s. Storm says he doesn’t because if he had a problem with someone, he’d take it up with them. Storm says he has their backs tonight if Aces and 8’s attack. Angle leaves and Storm has a look on his face that says…nothing of note actually.

The Gut Check judges talk in the back and Snow is ticked off about Ryan.

We get a recap of last week’s AJ/Clair/Daniels drama.

Bound For Glory Series Standings:

Samoa Joe 47

James Storm 43

Mr. Anderson 30

Jeff Hardy 28

Kurt Angle 27

Christopher Daniels 26

Rob Van Dam 21

Magnus 14

AJ Styles 14

D’Angel Dinero 7

Bully Ray 7

Robbie E 5

Bound For Glory Series: AJ Styles vs. James Storm

Feeling out process to start as Clair is watching from the crowd. Storm gets control with the form of a chinlock and a kind of mat slam for one. A backdrop sets up another chinlock but AJ pops up again. The drop down/kick gets two and AJ sends Storm face first into the buckle. A suplex puts Storm down and it’s back to the chinlock. Storm makes his comeback with some clotheslines and a forearm for two. Another suplex gets two for Storm.

AJ sends him into the corner but misses a splash/forearm. Storm puts him on the top rope with AJ’s back to the ring. Styles tries to escape but gets caught in the Eye of the Storm for two. Storm goes to the middle rope but his tornado DDT is countered into a release northern lights suplex into the corner for two. Springboard forearm gets two. Styles Clash is countered into an Alabama Slam for two. Storm rams Styles’ face into the apron for another two. AJ kicks him in the head out of nowhere and hits the Pele….and here are Aces and 8’s for the beatdown at about 11:00. They didn’t touch Storm.

Rating: B-. This was getting good at the end and I’m assuming it was a DQ win for Styles as he was the one that they hit first. At the end of the day, sometimes the best idea is just to have two guys that are talented go out there for awhile and do big moves and near falls to each other. This worked well as you were wondering who was going to get the win, and above all else: CLAIR DIDN’T DO ANYTHING.

Gut Check time. Shaw says he’s got what it takes, Snow says he didn’t get to see what Shaw did tonight but he wants to stick it to Ryan and say yes, but he has to say no due to a lack of evidence. Pritchard says yes. Shaw cuts a promo and sucks up to Taz because he wants to work with the best. Taz says yes, meaning we won’t be seeing Shaw for a few months if the pattern holds.

Back to Aries and the X guys. Aries: “Dutt: Himalayan American, King: African American. Darsow: Wasn’t your dad Russian?” Darsow: “Just a sympathizer.” Darsow says he’s flashy but Aries says he’s cut because Darsow isn’t ready. Aries: “Tell your dad hello and that his repo business is doing great.”

X-Division Title: Zema Ion vs. Kenny King

Dutt doesn’t get it because of his shoulder. Ion pauses for some hairspray and things speed up. King dropkicks him down and hits a flying shoulder attack in the corner. Springboard crossbody gets two and it’s time for some punches. Ion sends him to the floor and hits a flip dive to take over. A missile dropkick puts King down and hooks a crossface chickenwing. Ion has a busted lip or mouth. A sunset flip out of the corner gets two for King but he walks into a modified backbreaker for two for Ion.

King clotheslines him down again and hits an atomic drop followed by a spin kick to the head for two. Overhead high cradle suplex puts Ion down but he keeps coming for some reason. Ion kicks him to the floor and hits a corkscrew plancha to take Ion down again. King loads up a springboard…and Bobby Roode trips him up and posts him, allowing Ion to hit a moonsault for the pin to retain at 6:14.

Rating: C. This was a very strange ending but it’s certainly intriguing. King looked good here and if he’s going to be getting programmed with Roode (even though Roode has a world title match at the PPV) there’s nothing bad about that at all. Ion is going to hold the belt for awhile, but I’d be surprised if there isn’t at least one title change before Sorensen comes back.

My guess is that Roode did that because Aries picked King. Aries runs out and jumps Roode.

Ray says he respects Angle but he’s beating him tonight.

Ion/Roode vs. Aries/King next week.

Bound For Glory Series: Bully Ray vs. Kurt Angle

Feeling out process to start with the Angle Slam and Big Boot both missing. Ray tries to use power but gets caught in the ankle lock as a result. He makes the rope and it’s off to the arm for Kurt. Ray hits a SICK piledriver for two as we take a break. Back with Ray working on the neck some more, only for Angle to come back and hit a belly to belly for two. Ray hits the Bully Bomb for two of his own and it’s time for Rolling Germans.

There’s the ankle lock but Ray rolls through to escape. They slug it out and Ray hits a Rock Bottom for two. Ray misses a big boot and the Angle Slam gets two. Moonsault misses but Angle breaks up the Bubba Cutter. Big boot gets two and Ray is frustrated. Ray misses a charge and the Angle Slam gets the pin at 11:54.

Rating: B. I was digging this as it was Angle 101, which means it works very well. Good match here as you had two guys beating on each other for about twelve minutes and seeing who was going to be able to get the pin finally. Angle winning makes the most sense but it looked great to see Ray getting that close.

Post match here are Aces and 8’s on Angle but AJ, Aries, Sting and eventually Storm come out to clear the ring. Angle still thinks Storm was behind it. Next week: Angle vs. Storm.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this show better than I have the last few episodes. Aces and 8’s were a factor here but they didn’t dominate the show like they did last week. King being brought up a bit is also a good thing and it gives Roode and Aries something to do before the PPV. They had a good balance going tonight and that’s what the show has been lacking in recent weeks. Better show this week by far.

Results

Gail Kim/Madison Rayne b. Mickie James/Tara – Rollup to James

Douglas Williams b. Sam Shaw – Rolling Chaos Theory

AJ Styles vs. James Storm went to a no contest when Aces and 8’s interfered

Zema Ion b. Kenny King – Moonsault

Kurt Angle b. Bully Ray – Angle Slam

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

NXT
Date: July 25, 2012
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: William Regal, Byron Saxton

We’re back with the sixth week of NXT and it barely feels that long at all. We’ve got some stories coming together and tonight it’s Cesaro vs. Riley which should be a decent match. It really is remarkable how much better this show is with just some minor adjustments to it, like giving us stories and matches consisting of more than about ten people. Let’s get to it.

The new intro for WWE programming is shorter than the old one. It says WWE: Then, Now, Forever. I’m not sure I like it better than the old one but it’s fine.

Bo Dallas/Derrick Bateman vs. Johnny Curtis/Michael McGillicutty

Regal says Michael and Johnny could be one of the best tag teams ever. I don’t often say this, but I think Regal may be wrong. Also, why is WWE so obsessed with having Bateman vs. Curtis? Apparently Cena says that Bateman is the strongest pound for pound guy in the company. That’s not something I would have guessed. Fast paced start with Bateman/Dallas clearing the ring but Dallas gets caught on the floor.

Back inside and McGillicutty hooks a chinlock on Dallas but it doesn’t last long. Dallas grabs a sunset flip but Curtis had gotten a blind tag and breaks it up. Dallas escapes a hold from Curtis and there’s the tag to Bateman to no reaction. A flapjack puts Curtis down and a flip neckbreaker gets two. McGillicutty cheap shots Bateman, allowing Curtis to hit a Falcon’s Arrow for the pin at 4:06.

Rating: C. For a quick tag match which didn’t mean much of anything, this wasn’t bad at all. They were moving very fast here and even though the matchup that is being pushed here in the form of Bateman vs. Curtis is played out, the addition of two extra people helped a lot. McGillicutty could be something awesome, but his name is crippling him.

Antonio Cesaro vs. Alex Riley

JR has jumped in on commentary. Riley gets his usual good reaction, and since Cena isn’t here to be annoyed because of something we never would know about if not for dirt sheets, Riley can actually have a match. Cesaro takes him down with amateur stuff to start but Riley speeds things up and hits a dropkick for two. Cesaro hot shots him and Riley is in trouble again. The crowd got very quiet all of a sudden.

Regal gets very excited about an abdominal stretch but Riley counters into a rollup for two. Antonio muscles him down and hits a big boot in the corner for two. A delayed gutwrench suplex gets two. Back to the abdominal stretch but Cesaro hooks his leg over Riley’s head on top of it. It looks great but Riley counters in about 10 seconds. Riley pounds away with right hands and some clotheslines. A spinebuster puts Cesaro down but Aksana pops up on the apron. Cesaro hits a kind of spear/side slam and the Gotch Style Neutralizer (Regal called it that) gets the pin at 5:12. It’s a falling forward cradle piledriver.

Rating: C-. This was an extended squash and in that regard it worked well. If the recent reports about Riley are true, that’s another name on the list of guys that have a bunch of potential who are held down because of some stupid thing that happened backstage that only a handful of people think means anything. Cesaro looks good but for some reason he can’t get on TV at all. I’m sure it’s because he “doesn’t know how to work” or something like that.

Kassius Onoo says that he brings danger to the table because he can fly, he can use holds and he can hit you. He closes it out with this: “My name is Kassius. I hurt people.” I like that.

Drew McIntyre, who faces Seth Rollins tonight, says tonight the talking about Rollins ends.

Natalya vs. Sofia Cortez

Natalya quickly takes her to the mat but gets caught in a headscissors. They get back to their feet but Cortez armdrags her down again. Nattie comes back with a discus lariat and spanks Cortez a bit. Natalya hooks a suplex and a cool looking pinning combination for two. O’Connor Roll gets two for Natayla and Cortez kicks her out of the ring on the kickout. Natalya is fine but sits on the floor for the countout at 3:10. She shouted at the referee to count because she wasn’t getting back in.

Rating: C+. I know I bash the Divas a lot, but this was a decent little match. They were moving out there and they never looked like they were trying to follow a list of moves out there. What I mean by that is it looked natural out there, which is a big flaw in most Divas matches today. Good stuff here and I don’t remember the last time I said that about the Divas.

Natalya runs back into the ring and beats Cortez down, putting her in the Sharpshooter.

Video on Raw 1000. That really was a fun show.

The Ascension vs. Dante Dash/Garrett Dylan

Dash and O’Brien start but O’Brien charges through him and blasts Dylasn off the apron. Kameron comes in and Ascension drops rapid fire elbows on Dash. Down goes Dylan off the apron again and the Downcast (jawbreaker out of a flapjack) gets the pin on Dash at 1:46.

Big E. Langston is still coming and he debuts next week.

Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre

I miss the full Broken Dreams entrance. That thing was awesome. Rollins speeds things up to start and dropkicks Drew down. Another dropkick puts McIntyre on the floor and a dive takes Drew down again. Back with a double clothesline putting both guys down. Rollins nips up and hits an enziguri to take Drew down. They head to the corner but Rollins’ charge hits the middle buckle. The advantage doesn’t last long as Rollins rolls Drew up for two and clotheslines him down for the same. A Phoenix Splash (moonsault into a 450) misses and Drew kicks Seth’s head off. Futureshock gets the clean pin at 5:30 shown of 9:00.

Rating: C-. This was basically a squash with a surprise ending. Rollins looked good here with him flying all over the place and hitting almost everything he tried. The ending is a bit questionable but it gives McIntyre a bit of credibility when he loses on this show more often. That’s probably the right move and the match wasn’t awful or anything.

Overall Rating: B-. That seems to be the consistent grade for this show. There were some good matches here and at the end we had the promise of something major being announced next week. I have a feeling I know what that is and that’ll make things a lot more interesting around here. The main event wasn’t much but it did its job well enough. Another good show here.

Results

Michael McGillicutty/Johnny Curtis b. Derrick Bateman/Bo Dallas – Falcon’s Arrow to Bateman

Antonio Cesaro b. Alex Riley – Gotch Style Neutralizer

Sofia Cortez b. Natalya via countout

The Ascension b. Dante Dash/Garrett Dylan – Downcash to Dash

Drew McIntyre b. Seth Rollins – Futureshock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

There are approximately 85 new posts up but I’m all caught up with the stuff I did on the other version.  The All Reviews page is completely caught up.

KB

WWWF House Show
Date: August 28, 1978
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentator: Vince McMahon

So apparently this is a different show than I thought it was. The show is dated wrong and it’s about a year after it was supposed to be. We’re in the Backlund Era here and tonight he defends against former champion Ivan Koloff. Other than that we have Dusty Rhodes vs. Billy Graham and Andre in a six man tag. Let’s get to it.

Stan Stasiak vs. Dominic DeNucci

Stasiak looks old and flabby. They trade some basic holds and it’s a standoff. Stasiak hooks the arm but DeNucci makes the rope. Stan gets in a right hand to take over and it’s into a front facelock. DeNucci cranks on the arm and bends it over his shoulder which the crowd is pleased with. Stasiak tries his Heart Punch but DeNucci ducks and goes right back to the arm.

We get a technical error as a graphic for the next match pops up on screen during an armbar. Stasiak kicks out of the armbar and is put right back into it, this time on the mat. Now Stasiak hooks the arm and uses the tights to keep DeNucci down. Dominic comes back and it’s right back to an armbar to keep Stasiak in trouble. Stasiak finally bails to the floor to break up the monotony. Back in and Stan gets all fired up and pounds away but the Heart Punch is broken up again.

They fight over a full nelson and exchange control of it more than once each. DeNucci finally says screw this and forearms Stasiak in the face. This match has time limit draw written all over it. They slug it out with Stasiak being staggered. Stasiak hooks a hammerlock and they slug it out some more. DeNucci hooks an abdominal stretch which he drops very quickly.

Stasiak elbows him in the face and both guys are down. Stan hits a cross body of all things for two and DeNucci does the same. I don’t think he taught Foley to do that one. The third attempt at a Heart Punch is countered and DeNucci knocks him to the apron. DeNucci works on the hand which apparently was injured coming into this. Dominic hits him with a Heart Punch and then a second one which has Stasiak in trouble.

Stasiak finally hits the Heart Punch….and it has no effect after the hand wrap he had was taken off. Instead he punches Dominic in the face which only gets him tied up in the ropes. They trade punches again with DeNucci in far better shape than Stasiak is here. DeNucci punches him down again and covers but the time limit expires.

Rating: C-. The match was pretty boring but this was a match of the times. The arm work and the punching was pretty dull but the fans were into this which is the point of an opening match. Stasiak was pretty dull in the ring but to be fair it was like six years after he had lost the title in the first place. Not a very good match or anything but at the time it wouldn’t have been horrible.

Baron Mikel Scicluna vs. Haystacks Calhoun

Calhoun is a big fat country boy while Baron is a European jerk. Baron pounds away on him but gets caught in the corner by the power of fat. Scicluna hammers away but Calhoun pounds him into the corner again. Off to a bearhug but Baron breaks it with a headbutt. Calhoun knocks him into the ropes and shakes him very hard. That’s a new one.

Now Calhoun sits on the other rope so the referee can’t untie him. Now that’s just not nice at all. He pokes Scicluna in the eyes but Baron comes back with some punches. Calhoun goes down and Baron uses a wide variety of stomps. The fat man comes back with some kicks and a back elbow to set up the splash for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was more fast paced but it wasn’t anything more interesting. Calhoun was one of those fun characters that got the crowd going while Scicluna was one of those evil foreign heels that isn’t really all that interesting. For some reason he’s in the Hall of Fame though, which is one of the more questionable entries in there. The match wasn’t terrible but the first thirty minutes of this show haven’t done anything for me so far.

Special Delivery Jones vs. Victor Rivera

Rivera has Freddie Blassie with him so you know he’s evil. He stalls a lot but gets in a cane shot to take over. Blassie leaves which I think was a rule of some kind back then. Jones gets knocked to the floor and Rivera stomps on him from inside. That goes on for a few minutes until Jones finally gets in a shoulder through the ropes. Rivera pops him in the ribs again to take over. Jones gets knocked to the floor again and the stalling continues.

He finally gets back in and knocks Rivera to the floor so the stalling can be reversed. We’re over five minutes into this now and there might have been a minute of contact so far. Back in now and Rivera stomps away very slowly. Off to a nerve hold as this is going nowhere at all. Jones comes back with some elbows but gets pulled back to the mat. That works so well that they do it again. Jones comes back with a headbutt and dances a bit. A charge into the post misses though and Rivera wins with a suplex.

Rating: F. This was one of the most boring matches I have ever seen. When about nine minutes of a ten minute match are spent either in a nerve hold or stalling, there’s no way you can call this a success of any kind. If this match is any indication, I totally get why his match at WrestleMania went about 30 seconds. Horribly uninteresting match.

WWWF World Title: Bob Backlund vs. Ivan Koloff

Bob is defending and Ivan has Albano with him. Backlund has only been champion about six months at this point. It’s weird seeing Backlund being in his late 20s and looking even younger. The name graphic leaves the A out of Backlund’s name. Backlund backdrops him to start as the crowd goes very silent for some reason. A headscissors puts Ivan down and Backlund holds on with a leg vice around Ivan’s head. They go to the mat and Backlund bridges up in a nice power display.

Ivan puts him on the top rope but gets kicked away. Off to another standoff and it’s test of strength time. Backlund goes down but comes back with a top wristlock, only to get caught in a headscissors. This goes on for a few minutes until Bob does a reverse nipup to escape. He dropkicks Ivan down and hooks a headscissors of his own as this is getting repetitive. Then again this is the way a lot of these matches went back then so this would be considered a big deal back then.

Backlund takes him back down again but gets caught in headscissors #4 of the night so far. Backlund finally gets out of that one as well and works on the knee a bit. Somehow we’re over fifteen minutes into this despite almost nothing happening other than headscissors so far. Bob stays on the leg and hooks a hold on for a few minutes. That’s another sign of the times: holds stay on FOREVER. I mean this one has been on for nearly four minutes at this point.

It finally gets broken up and Ivan suplexes him down for two. The idea of selling an injury must not have been invented yet. Or maybe it just doesn’t translate into Russian. Ivan hooks a short arm scissors but you can’t use that move on Bob Backlund, as in the guy that invented the counter that British Bulldog made famous on Shawn Michaels back in 1992.

Bob puts him on the top rope to counter and hooks something like a spinning toehold. Thankfully this one lasts less than the usual two hours with Ivan kicking him in the ribs. Ivan sends him into the ropes but they ram heads, sending Bob to the floor. Koloff is smart and breaks up the count so he can still win the title. Backlund gets rammed into the post and a backbreaker gets two.

Ivan goes up top for the biggest pop (and possibly the only one so far) of the match but his top rope knee drop misses. Backlund sends him in but gets kicked down again, this time back to the floor again. Koloff breaks up the count again, this time by going up top and jumping down onto the apron, kicking Bob in the head on the way down. That would be considered a big spot back then.

Backlund is busted open and we have to have the doctor look at it. That doesn’t work so the fight continues. Backlund goes off as he is known to do and Ivan is in trouble. A backdrop puts the challenger down…and the match is stopped because of the cut. Trash fills the ring and I can’t quite say I blame them for that.

Rating: C-. The ending was stupid but it had more to do with the athletic commission rather than the booking or anything. That being said, it made no sense to say Backlund can’t continue when he was beating the tar out of Koloff but whatever. Also, this match was fairly boring as I was looking for things to talk about during those rest holds which went on forever. I know it’s a different era, but that doesn’t make it any less dull.

Backlund wants to keep going but Ivan walks away. The title doesn’t change hands for some reason even though Ivan wins.

Luck Graham vs. Peter Maivia

Peter would of course be more famous for his grandson than anything he ever accomplished. Graham’s nickname is either Crazy or Fabulous depending on who you listen to. Peter is pretty short but he looks tough. Some bodybuilder is on commentary now with Vince. Feeling out process to start with no one having an advantage so far. Graham hooks the wrist for the first advantage of the match.

Vince criticizes Luke’s physique but he doesn’t own the company yet so it doesn’t mean as much at the moment. The hold goes on for awhile as is the custom in the 70s. Maivia finally rakes the eyes to break the hold before firing off some right hands. I think Maivia is the face here but it’s really not clear. Samoans tend to be evil but it would be weird to have a big monster like Luke against a tiny villain.

Peter hooks a nerve hold on Graham before punching him in the face again. Off to a bearhug as it does appear that Maivia is the bad guy here. Luke pokes Maivia in the throat to escape and both guys are down. Graham drops some slow motion ax handles onto the back of Maivia and they slug it out a bit. Peter chokes away as this match needs to end pretty soon. Maivia charges into a punch and Graham hits him in the throat again….and that’s a DQ.

Rating: D. The match was boring already because someone decided to give this fourteen minutes, and then they gave us that lame ending. I still have no idea who I was supposed to like in there but I think it was Maivia. Either way this was a really uninteresting match and the fans didn’t seem to care at all either.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Billy Graham

This is a Texas Bullrope match and it’s pin or not being able to answer an 8 (yes 8) count. Jay Strongbow is referee for some reason. Graham doesn’t want to be tied up so Strongbow grabs him and ties him up anyway. Graham keeps running and Dusty keeps pulling him in. The elbow to the head puts Graham down and he tries to run again. Another elbow stuns Graham but he rakes the eyes to get a break.

Dusty gets choked by the rope but Billy misses an elbow drop. The Dream is busted open and Graham hooks his bearhug. That doesn’t last long for some reason so Billy goes up top. That’s REALLY FREAKING STUPID in a bullrope match as Dusty pulls him down to the mat. Billy is busted too and Dusty pounds away. Apparently this is the rubber match in a series. Graham comes back but Strongbow breaks it up for some reason. Dusty elbows him in the head and that’s enough for the 8 count and the win. That was a really abrupt ending.

Rating: C. This was fun while it lasted but unfortunately that wasn’t too long. There’s something cool about letting two guys beat the stuffing out of each other and that’s what happened here. I still don’t get what Strongbow had to do with this but maybe it was Graham’s next feud. Dusty never did much in the WWF but he did enough elsewhere to make up for it.

Women’s Title: Vicki Williams vs. Fabulous Moolah

Who do you think is defending? Moolah looks very different with black hair. Vicki whips her around by said hair to start and grabs an armbar. Moolah takes her down into a cross armbreaker but Vicki easily counters. That counter sequence goes on for awhile until Moolah says screw this wrestling nonsense and chokes away in the corner. Sunset flip gets two for Vicki. Moolah grabs a rollup out of nowhere for the pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here but that was common for the girls back then. Moolah held the title for about 20 years so it was pretty common to see her win here. Vicki was the challenger of the week for her so it’s not like this match meant anything. Vicki probably trained her too.

The main event is one I’ve done from Best of the WWF Volume 14 so I’ll just copy and paste it.

Spiros Arion/Yukon Lumberjacks vs. Andre the Giant/Tony Garea/Dino Bravo

This is from the late 70s. The Lumberjacks are the tag champions and named Eric and Pierre. We’re in MSG here and this is 2/3 falls. Very international match here with three Canadians, a Frenchman, a Greek and a New Zealander. Vince is the lone commentator here and actually calls Andre Andre Roussimoff. Eric is the Lumberjack with blonde hair. Got it. He starts with Garea.

Two quick armdrags send Eric running to bring in Arion. I think we’re clipped but I’m not sure. This is just punching. Off to Pierre, meaning Garea has fought all three guys now. Off to a top wristlock and I think the camera is just jumping around a lot. Either that or it’s the best clipping I’ve ever seen. Eric comes in again and gets slammed. The heels finally get Tony into the corner but Andre breaks that up, drawing a DQ for the first fall. I forgot it was 2/3 so that bell was really surprising. Oh wait the Lumberjacks got disqualified for the triple teaming. Ok then.

Garea and Eric start the second fall as well. Bravo comes in for the first time and I’ve never seen him move that fast. Arion comes in and we get a crisscross. Bravo beats Eric up for awhile but Pierre comes in to take over. A slam gets two. Off to Andre and the place erupts. See, this is something you don’t have in WWE anymore: an attraction. Andre was someone that was beloved and the people didn’t care what he did.

Andre here is in the last match of the night (more brilliant booking. Why have him in the middle and let everyone leave after he’s been in the ring? More beers and Cokes sold while people wait) and it’s a worthless six man tag, but the people want to see him. It’s not about some angle or the world title or whatever. It’s about Andre and whatever he’s doing. The people told the company what they wanted to see and that’s who got the big spot. Not the other way around. Very key difference. As for the match, a splash ends it about 10 seconds after Andre comes in.

Rating: C-. The match was boring, but it’s amazing to see something like Andre when he was still young(ish) and could move. The crowd reacts to him and that’s all it needs to be. He didn’t have to spend ten minutes sucking up to them. He was cool and the fans reacted to it. What more did you need than that?

Overall Rating: D+. The best thing I can say about this is that I’ve seen worse. The 70s are just such a different time that it’s hard for a modern fan to watch something like this and get into it. The wrestling wasn’t that great here but it wasn’t the worst ever. The ton of rest holds hurt things a lot and the crowd wasn’t all that excited about a lot of this stuff. It really is amazing how much Hogan changed everything just a few years after this.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

WWF Wrestling Challenge
Date: February 14, 1988
Location: Wicomico Youth and Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Happy Valentine’s Day and it’s time to talk about the Main Event. The gag order thing is gone now and we can talk about what happened nine days ago. I don’t remember if they did last week or not but they certainly are here. The world title is currently in question and it’s possible we’ll hear about the solution to that problem, which would take place at Wrestlemania IV. Let’s get to it.

Gene immediately screws up two things: he says he’s at ringside when he’s on the platform and says let’s go to our announcers but it’s the opening segment.

We look at a highlight package from The Main Event. By that I mean about seven minutes out of a nine minute match. We also get the post match reveal of the second Dave Hebner.

DiBiase is wearing the title and says he told us all this would happen but no one believed him. He looks like pure evil with that on him.

We also get Hogan’s ranting promo from that night, wanting to know how much money did it cost to pay off Hebner.

Jack Tunney says that neither Hogan nor Andre nor DiBiase is world champion. The title is vacant and there will be a tournament at Wrestlemania IV for the title. The brackets are shown and in a little interesting bit of trivia, they’re different than they would be at the PPV. The pairings are all the same but they’re in a different order. Hogan and Andre receive first round byes.

The show is almost half over already.

Don Muraco vs. Ken Johnson

Muraco is fired up for the tournament. The match is a lot of stalling until Muraco gets his hands on him. A suplex puts Johnson down and drives a knee into his face from the top rope. Tombstone and we’re done.

Jim Duggan is fired up for the tournament. He can’t worry about his second round opponent though.

We get some highlights of Warrior vs. Hercules last week where the chain was broken.

Islanders vs. Lanny Poffo/Eric Cooper

Tama and Poffo get us going with Lanny working on the arm. Cooper comes in and the beating begins. Gorilla talks about wrestling Sammartino for 94 minutes. Ok then. A suplex/cross body combination pins Cooper quick.

Slick says his men are ready for Mania. Reed and OMG seem confident too.

We get the end of Bigelow vs. Joe Mirto. Ok then.

Hogan still wants to know how much Dibiase paid the referee. He isn’t preaching the gospel of Hulkamania because he’s got a bye in the first round. This is one of his out there promos.

Honky Tonk Man plugs the WWF Magazine.

Bad News Brown vs. David Stoudemire

Total squash here so there isn’t much to say. Heenan and Gorilla argue about Hebner and the tournament until the Ghetto Blaster ends this.

Jose Estrada/Dusty Wolfe vs. British Bulldogs

The Bulldogs say Matilda is recovering. Smith and I think Wolfe start us off and there’s the delayed suplex. The powerslam/headbutt combo ends the massacre.

DiBiase and Andre say they’ll win the tournament.

Overall Rating: B. It’s hard to call this one as the majority of the show was a recap of the events on the fifth. That being said, those were some very interesting events and seeing them again is something that sets up the vast majority of Wrestlemania IV, which is a huge deal. Based on that alone, I’ll say this is a good show but your individual taste may vary.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Superstars of Wrestling
Date: November 22, 1986
Location: Broome County Arena, Binghamton, New York
Attendance: 6,400
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Bruno Sammartino

Wow I haven’t done one of these in awhile. We’re closing in on 1987 and the beginning of the build towards Wrestlemania. I’m hoping the source I get these from finishes out the year because I have about the first three months worth of Superstars from that year already done. It’s an awesome time period for the company and things are just about to explode. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence does its opening thing.

Vince runs down the card and HOKEY SMOKE there are two famous things on this show.

Steamboat talks about his match later on but I won’t spoil who it’s against. Never mind as it’s the opener.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Savage vs. Ricky Steamboat

Hebner and Danny Davis argue over who gets to be the referee here. Steamboat is all fired up but Hebner (who I guess won the argument) tears him off Savage. Ricky speeds things up again and slams the champ down for two before hitting the armdrag into the armbar as only he can. Savage gets up and runs Steamboat over a few times but gets caught in another perfect armdrag.

Savage counters by ramming Ricky into the buckle and drops a knee for two. The double ax off the top gets a somewhat delayed two but Savage thinks he won. Steamboat sends him into the corner but Savage comes out with a spinning crossbody. Ricky rolls through it and gets two for himself though. Now Randy gets whipped into the corner and Steamboat hits a top rope chop but doesn’t cover.

Steamboat pounds away and even Vince isn’t sure why he didn’t cover. When 1986 McMahon questions you, you must have REALLY done something stupid. Sunset flip doesn’t work for Steamboat but he skins the cat and gets an O’Connor Roll for two. The referee gets knocked down by Savage (accident) and Steamboat hits the cross body.

Hebner tries to count but Davis blocks the count for no apparent reason. Well that’s assuming you don’t count being EVIL as a reason. They go to the floor and Savage rams him into the barricade. He goes up top and drops the ax onto Steamboat, ramming the Dragon’s throat into the barricade. That gives Savage the countout win but the more important stuff is coming.

Rating: B-. Even though it ended with a countout, this was one of the best Superstars matches I can ever remember. Then again, look at the people in it. Would you expect anything else? This was much more about building an angle rather than the match though, so we should get back to what’s going on.

Savage gets the bell and drives it into Steamboat’s throat, further injuring Steamboat’s windpipe. This draws MOLTEN heat from the crowd and would set up their rematch and arguably the best match ever at Wrestlemania 3. Savage would go on to feud with Steele for a few months until on SNME when Steele said he had a surprise for Savage. I think you can fill in the blanks yourself, and it was AWESOME. Steamboat is taken out on a stretcher while Vince shouts about how he can’t breathe.

UPDATE!

Paul Orndorff is the #1 contender to Hulk Hogan and thinks anyone claiming otherwise is crazy. Orndorff says comparing him to Hogan is like comparing ice cream to horse manure.

Al Navaro vs. Junkyard Dog

Powerslam in maybe 35 seconds ends this. Next.

Bruno can’t believe what he just saw with Steamboat and Savage. Steamboat is getting looked at and can’t breathe still. An ambulance is coming.

Hogan says he’s ready for Kamala in the Boston Gardens. I’ve seen that match actually and it sucked.

Billy Graham is out in Phoenix and says he’s training in the desert.

Dino Bravo vs. Kurt Kauffman

This is another squash that runs almost twice as long as the previous one. Bravo wins it with a belly to back suplex before Fink can finish reading the house show ads.

The Islanders say they’re ready for the Dream Team in Boston. It’s weird hearing Haku talk.

Outback Jack is training with some natives in Australia. Ok then.

Jimmy Jack Funk vs. Dick Slater

Oh jeez the Rebel Dick Slater. This was one of those gimmicks that went NOWHERE and thankfully didn’t last long. Slater says that he’s from the south while Funk jumps him. He fights back but goes up and gets slammed off. Dick comes back with a neckbreaker and Funk begs off. An elbow to the head sets up the figure four but Funk escapes. Slater sends him into the buckle and hits a top rope elbow to the back followed by a regular one for the pin. Just a squash for the most part.

Time for Piper’s Pit. The guests are King Curtis, Kim Chee and Kamala. Curtis shouts a lot as he is known to do and talks about Piper needing friends in the future. Piper wants to know what the moon on Kamala’s stomach means. Kamala takes his mask off and that’s about it.

Billy Jack Haynes vs. Ray Vance

This is almost joined in progress for some reason. Haynes pounds him down with pure power and hooks the full nelson for the tap out. This lasted maybe a minute or so.

Now we get what is probably a one time only thing in wrestling history: Honky Tonk Man hears the results of a fan poll, asking for a vote of confidence. If the fans vote him down then they don’t approve of him. If they vote for him, they like him. This is basically voting for him to stay face or turn heel. With 674,000 votes in, over 600,000 are against Honky. He’s not happy and storms off.

Hillbilly Jim/Tito Santana/Pedro Morales vs. Dream Team/Johnny V

Jim and Valentine start things off but it’s off to Morales very quickly. Off to Beefcake who gets backdropped quickly and Tito gets the tag. Santana cleans house and it’s back to Jim. Beefcake takes the Hillbilly down and Johnny V comes in. That goes nowhere so Santana comes in for the Figure Four. Everything breaks down and Davis throws it out, but DQ’s Santana’s team for starting the whole thing. Too short to rate but it was about Davis so there you go.

More Boston show stuff with Heenan talking about how great Pedro Morales used to be. He’s facing Harley Race, but let’s talk about Orndorff instead. Heenan doesn’t like that Kamala is getting the title match against Hogan but it’s the JYD that is getting Orndorff in Boston. JYD is just a roadblock and he needs to get ready to get run over. Solid promo here.

Steamboat has been taken to the hospital. Savage wants an update and Sammartino isn’t happy. They get in a fight which led to a brief feud between the two of them.

Overall Rating: B. Considering my biggest complaint about this show is that nothing ever happens, how can I not give this a higher than average rating? Two BIG things happened here as well as we had what was probably the best match in the history of the show up to this point. Good show here and easily the best they’ve had so far.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Money in the Bank 2012
Date: July 15, 2012
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

It’s amazing how a year can change things. A year ago this was the hottest show in the world but now this is just another show. There’s nothing going on with this show that is going to overshadow what happens on the 1000th Raw. The main events tonight are the two ladder matches and the two world title matches. That’s the extent of the card so all four matches are main events. Let’s get to it.

Note that I’ll be watching this a few hours after it aired so I already know the endings. I had some issues avoiding spoilers, but the final three matches were all reviewed live.

Kofi Kingston/R-Truth vs. Hunico/Camacho

Pre-show match. This is non-title for no reason whatsoever that I can tell. I get that Hunico and Camacho aren’t the number one contenders, but MAYBE THEY SHOULDN’T BE IN THIS MATCH THEN. Truth and Hunico start with Hunico running off Little Jimmy. Hunico’s music starts playing for a few seconds after the bell for some reason. Truth does his dance and works on the arm before bringing in Kofi. Kofi snaps off a rana for two and brings back Truth for a backbreaker for two.

Off to Camacho who hits a butterfly suplex for two. Hunico comes back in with a slingshot hilo for two. Truth hits the spinning forearm to put both guys down and there’s the hot tag to Kofi. He flies around well enough to clean a few rooms but Hunico ducks the kick and takes out Kingston’s knee. Kofi goes for a springboard but Camacho kicks the ropes out to break it up and take over.

Camacho back in now and he pounds down the speedy one (Kofi) on the middle rope. Some headbutts from Camacho (he’s Tongan/Samoan so that has to be expected) puts Kofi into the corner and it’s back to Hunico. He hooks a chinlock followed by a lifting powerbomb for two. Kofi gets sent into the corner but he comes out with a gorgeous rana to send Hunico down. There’s the tag to Truth and he goes nuts. A DDT gets two on Camacho and everything breaks down. Little Jimmy (move, not person) hits Camacho for the pin at 8:22.

Rating: C-. This was a tag match and that’s about all I’ve got for it. That being said, it was a good choice for a pre-show match as it was good enough to get the crowd going thanks to Kofi’s jumping, but it wasn’t good enough that it took away from later matches. Again though, why in the world wasn’t this the tag title match? The belts don’t mean anything so why not put them here?

Time for the real show now.

No video for some reason.

Smackdown World Title Money In The Bank: Christian vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Tensai vs. Santino Marella vs. Tyson Kidd vs. Damien Sandow vs. Sin Cara

The ring nearly clears out to start and it’s Tensai in control. He cleans house and heads out to get the first ladder. Kidd is down in the corner so Tensai slingshots him into a ladder draped over the middle rope. Tensai goes after Christian so Christian and Kidd team up to squash him with some ladders. Christian decks Kidd and goes up but here’s Santino for the save. Kidd goes up as well but Sandow shoves all three over.

Cody and Ziggler come in now and Ziggler gets rammed into the ladder face first. Ziggler will have none of that and sends Cody into the ladder as well. If this was a year ago that would have gotten a much better reaction. It’s Cara’s turn to go crazy now and he snaps off a bunch of ranas. After the one to Cody, Rhodes is holding his knee. Cara goes up after Ziggler and they badly botch something with both guys falling to the mat.

Kidd vs. Cara now and Kidd gets sunset flipped down for a cover because Cara is confused. Cara slams him onto a ladder but Christian takes him down. Captain Charisma tries a frog splash but it only hits ladder. Cody pops up but gets taken down by a springboard dropkick from Kidd. With everyone down, Santino goes up but Tensai grabs him for a powerbomb. That doesn’t actually happen as Tensai falls backwards and Santino almost lands on the ladder. The botches are mounting up quickly.

Kidd sends Tensai to the floor and hits a dive to take out the Big Bald. Sandow goes up but Cara makes a save. That gets him nowhere as Cara is knocked down again and it’s Sandow going up again. Christian makes the save and gets his hand on the case, but Sandow takes him down again. Christian counters being rammed into the ladder in the corner and hits the reverse DDT to take Sandow down. He charges into a knee from Sandow, but hits the spear a few seconds later, sending Sandow into the ladder.

Christian goes up but Ziggler and Cody slams him into the ladder to make the save. They both go up and Ziggler gets rammed face first into the ladder. Tensai pulls Cody down and locks him in the Tree of Woe, only to have Kidd make the save. The Canadian is sent down and it’s Cara/Santino for the save. They get knocked down too so here’s Christian with some ladder shots to put Tensai back on the mat.

Ziggler sends Christian to the floor and it’s time for Santino to go insane. He hits his usual stuff on Ziggler and loads up the Cobra to take out Ziggler. Santino goes up but gets scared of heights. The Cobra makes him climb and takes out Sandow, but Cody dropkicks Santino, sending both him and the ladder down. Cody (whose leg appears to be fine now) throws a ladder at Santino and sets up another one in the middle of the ring.

Cody goes up and Vickie climbs the ladder to stop him. Ziggler makes a fast climb and hits the Zig Zag off the ladder to pull Cody down. Christian makes the last minute save and Sandow climbs another ladder. All three are up there so Kidd springboards in and takes Ziggler down in an awesome spot. Christian slams a ladder into Sandow’s face and they both go to the floor.

Tensai comes back and goes insane, setting up a ladder between the announce table and the ring. Cara gets powerbombed onto it ala last year, followed by Ziggler getting launched over the announce table in a cool looking power display by Tensai. Cody pops up from the middle of nowhere and hits a pair of Disaster Kicks to put Tensai down.

Kidd and Rhodes go up the ladder but Christian climbs another ladder. Cody drops Kidd but Christian spears Cody off the ladder. Christian and Santino go up but Marella is knocked down. Ziggler runs up from out of nowhere, sends Christian into another ladder and pulls down the case for the win at 18:23.

Rating: B-. There was only so much they could do here with eight people and that’s what really brought things down here. With eight people, there aren’t enough spots to go around and it catches up to them every year. Sandow wasn’t needed here and I don’t think Cara was either. Neither guy really did much in the match but they didn’t bring it down either. The botches hurt it too, making this a pretty good match but more of a mess than anything else.

Sheamus talks about how Alberto slammed a car hood on his back. Sheamus’ dad taught him that you can tell a lot about a man by the car he drives. He isn’t much to look at, but he has it under the hood. Oh and Ricardo is a spare tire.

The Miz is back. He has very slicked back hair and talks about being gone due to filming a movie. He’s tired of being overlooked, so tonight he’s adding himself into the Raw World title MITB match.

Mick Foley winning the world title on January 4, 1999 is a Raw moment.

We recap Del Rio vs. Sheamus. The idea here is that Del Rio is finally getting his one on one shot and it’s his destiny. Sheamus has a bad shoulder and some other injuries after being attacked by Del Rio over the last few months.

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio

After some big match intros (complete with an old school weapons check) we’re ready to go. Sheamus knocks him to the floor and it’s time to stall. Back in and Del Rio gets knocked to the corner but he grabs the arm to take over. Scratch the taking over part as Sheamus hits an elbow to the face for two. Del Rio charges into another boot and a knee to the head gets two. Sheamus lowers his head and gets kicked in the face followed by a dropkick.

The champ still won’t have anything like that as he rams Del Rio into the buckle and suplexes him into the ring. Top rope shoulder gets two. Ricardo earns his paycheck with a distraction, allowing Del Rio to hit an enziguri to put Sheamus on the floor. There’s a shot to the shoulder and Del Rio takes over. A top rope dropkick gets two on Sheamus and it’s off to an armbar. Alberto hits a DDT on the arm for two and he slaps Sheamus in the back of the head a bit.

Del Rio cranks on the arm some more and hits a high kick for two. After a little more time in the armbar, Sheamus hits a neckbreaker to give himself a breather. It’s followed up by some ax handles to the face but Sheamus charges into the post. After a headbutt it’s time for the cross armbreaker, but Sheamus escapes. The slingshot shoulder is countered into a Codebreaker to the arm for two. The champ comes back with a knee lift and powerslam for two out of nowhere.

Sheamus hits the ten forearms to the chest but Del Rio drapes the arm over the top. Alberto charges right into the Irish Curse for two. Regal Roll is broken up and Sheamus charges into a boot. Brogue Kick misses and Del Rio hits a Backstabber for two. The enziguri in the corner misses and there’s White Noise. Brogue Kick retains the title clean at 14:24.

Rating: C+. It’s no wonder this title is treated like a midcard title: there’s nothing here at all. There was almost no heat on this match and while it was ok, this felt like a TV main event instead of a PPV world title match. The feud feels thrown together and that’s not what you want for a match like this. Or maybe it’s that no one cares about Del Rio at all.

Post match Ricardo and Del Rio jump Sheamus, so here’s Ziggler with his case. After Del Rio is sent away, Sheamus kicks Dolph’s head off before the bell so there’s no match.

We get a promo from the pre-show from Bryan, who says he and AJ are soul mates.

Truth and Kofi come out to watch the next match.

Prime Time Players vs. Epico/Primo

Epico and Primo now have massive bibs with their names on them. AW is mic’d up again and it’s Primo vs. Titus to start. Titus takes over as Kofi calls Titus a horse. Off to Young as the crowd is DEAD. Primo hits a sweet headscissors out of the corner and it’s off to Epico. Primo launches himself at Young on the floor and Titus is sent out after him. Epico hits a huge dive to take out all of them.

Back in and Epico hits a slingshot hilo for two on Young. Back to Titus as AW continues to not have much to say. Oh scratch that as he wants a round of applause for his guys. Titus rams Epico into the post and works on the back in the ring. Young comes in again and dances a bit. He gets Epico on the apron and AW stops things to work on Young’s hair. Back to Titus for some backbreakers and a fallaway slam for two.

Titus stops to dance which causes Rosa to dance and get the crowd to make the first noise of this match. It also allows for the ice cold tag to Primo. He cleans house and hits a springboard chop and a springboard flip dive for two on Young. The hip attack to Young while Young is in 619 position sets up another springboard crossbody, but Primo dives into a gutbuster from Darren. Not that it matters as Primo rolls up Young for the pin at 9:30.

Rating: D+. I get that this is filler, but what in the world are they going for with these matches? The Players are the #1 contenders but now they’re losing to the former champions. I mean, it’s not like they’re getting their title shot anytime soon, but why would we want to see that anyway? There’s been almost no interaction between the teams and we barely ever see the champs anymore.

Post match the losers and the champs have a staredown and Truth throws water on AW. No physical contact is made. Again, why would you have the Players lose here, unless you want to make a three way feud?

We recap Punk vs. Bryan. This is all about AJ, as she’s gone nuts and is guest referee here. She seemingly loves both guys and there’s no real way to know who she’s going to side with tonight. Unless you’re on the writing/booking team for WWE but that’s a small group of people indeed.

AJ says both guys have hurt her.

Raw World Title: Daniel Bryan vs. CM Punk

This is now No DQ, Punk is defending and AJ is guest referee. Punk takes him to the mat and fires off some quick kicks. They head outside and Bryan gets rammed into the apron, only for Punk to get rammed into the barricade and kicked in the chest. Back in and Bryan fires off the YES kicks but gets rolled up for two. Bryan pounds away in the corner and they chop it out. That evolves into a strike off and the champion takes over.

A backbreaker looks to set up a middle rope legdrop but Bryan moves, followed by more YES kicks. They head to the floor again and Punk takes over, sending Bryan into the barricade again. Punk accidentally elbows AJ in the face, sending her out to the floor. The champ goes to check on her and Bryan uses the distraction to hit the running knee off the apron to take Punk down.

Punk gets draped over the steps on the floor and Bryan fires off more kicks. Punk comes back and sends Bryan into the timekeeper’s table. This is a back and forth match the entire time so far. The fans want tables because they’re greedy people. Punk pulls one out from under the ring but Bryan slams him down on the outside. Bryan finds a kendo stick and pounds away on the ribs of the champion. Punk rolls away and gets back inside while Bryan is still on the floor.

Back in and Punk gets the stick for a second, only for Bryan to go back to the ribs. Punk loads up a springboard but Bryan hits Punk in the ribs with the stick to take him down. Bryan fires away with stick shots to the ribs, complete with YES shouts. Those shots get two with the regular referee having taken over inside. Daniel goes up but the swan dive misses, putting both guys down.

They trade kicks and then forearms but it’s a leg lariat from Punk that takes Bryan down. Punk comes back with a running knee to the head and the snap powerslam for two. GTS and YES Lock are both countered and another GTS attempt is countered into a rana for two. Bryan kicks the champ’s head off and both guys are down. Bryan pops him in the back with a kendo stick and puts on a surfboard.

Punk manages to get to the kendo stick and beats the fire out of Bryan with it but can only get two. Punk goes up top but Bryan drills him with forearms to the head. Bryan pops up top and hits a superplex to put both guys down again. AJ is back and she sends the regular referee out to the floor. It’s time to skip! AJ pulls out a chair and Bryan crawls to her for it. Instead AJ throws the chair in the middle of the ring and it’s a scramble for it. Isn’t that how the XFL started its games?

Bryan gets in a kick to the ribs and pounds away on Punk with the chair for a close two. Bryan tries to talk to AJ calmly but it gets him rolled up for two by the champ. Daniel fires off more kicks to the chest of Punk and Punk can barely sit up in the corner. Bryan gets a running start but Punk comes out with a clothesline. Now Punk has the chair and blasts Bryan with it before wedging it between the top and middle ropes.

Punk goes to get Bryan to ram him into the chair, but AJ is standing in front of the chair. As Punk yells at her, Bryan comes up from behind and dropkicks Punk into the corner but not necessarily into the chair. Bryan goes to get the kendo stick but AJ is standing on it. She gives him a psycho stare and Bryan gives up. He walks into the high kick though and Punk slams Bryan onto the chair. The top rope elbow misses and the elbow hits the chair. Bryan throws on the YES Lock and grabs the stick at the same time to choke away.

Punk somehow bends back and blasts Bryan in the knee with the stick, followed by a GTS, but the champion can’t follow up. The GTS eventually gets two so Punk brings in a table. Punk loads up the elbow through the table but Bryan crotches Punk and hammers away. Punk slips down off the ropes and crotches Bryan at the same time. He pounds away with elbows and a belly to back superplex through the table FINALLY pins Bryan to retain the title.

Rating: A. This was GREAT at the end as I was hanging on every count of every near fall. That was a great match all the way through, but were you expecting anything else with these two having nearly half an hour? The major problem here though is the lack of AJ involvement. She basically did nothing other than blocking a weapon shot either way, and the ending was about the wrestling instead of her. That’s fine on paper, but we’ve spent two months building her up as the key to this whole thing. Still though, the match was more than enough to make up for that.

Ryback vs. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks

This was a pretty obvious pick. The “stars” have to tag here. Hawkins starts and pain follows. He gets sent to the floor and tags in Reks, who manages to take Ryback down for no count. Hawkins back in now and Ryback is actually in trouble. A double team actually gets one as Ryback is being beaten down. A gordbuster by Hawkins gets two. Reks comes in again and Ryback wakes up. The annoying fans chant Goldberg because Goldberg is the only wrestler to ever be pushed as a monster. The clothesline puts Hawkins down and Reks is Shell Shocked for the pin at 4:21.

Rating: D+. Nothing much here but they had to give Ryback more of a challenge eventually and that’s what happened here. Hawkins and Reks aren’t much, but they’re better than random jobbers. WWE has a huge roster, so there’s no reason to not use some of them against Ryback. At least it’s better than squash after squash.

Jericho debuting on Raw is a moment. That’s a good one for a change.

Layla/Kaitlyn/Tamina vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

When you have a seven match card and three are added the day of the show, you may be having some issues. Natayla and Tamina start us off as I guess Natalya is a heel again. Kaitlyn comes in with a cross body for two and it’s off to Beth. They trade slaps so here’s Eve, getting a slap of her own from Kaitlyn. Eve goes to the corner but comes out with a kick to the head for two. Beth comes in and chokes but it’s off to Layla. A sunset flip gets two for the champ (Layla) and everything breaks down. Tamina superkicks Beth into the Layout for the pin at 3:20.

Rating: D. Why do the Divas wrestle? Honestly, I’d like an answer to that question. There are so many people you could send out there that would have something better to offer in the future, but we have to sit through this stuff instead. The girls are hot but they can’t wrestle. Cut down the roster to a few good looking ones and stop having them wrestle. Make two divisions if nothing else: models and wrestlers. It can’t be that hard.

Raw World Title Money In The Bank: John Cena vs. Kane vs. The Miz vs. Big Show vs. Chris Jericho

Main event time. So the ideas here are that Cena has never been in one of these before, Show is “unstoppable”, Jericho is the originator of these matches, and that’s about it. Jericho, Miz and Kane go to the floor quickly and Cena clotheslines Show to the outside. Show sends Jericho into the ladder and Miz goes for the case, only to be stopped by Cena. Show clears the ring but here’s Kane to slow him down. That gets him nowhere and Miz goes down too.

Jericho comes in and grabs a quick Codebreaker to put Show down and Miz hits a DDT on him too. Kane boots Show to the floor and Cena is waiting. He hits a HUGE AA through the table and all four guys bury Show with ladders. All this has happened in the first four minutes of the match or so. Jericho is like screw this teamwork stuff and hits everyone with a ladder before going for a climb. Miz makes the save but gets put in the Walls for his efforts.

Kane breaks that up for some reason and Jericho has to fight him off. Miz goes up but Jericho makes the save after knocking Cena off the apron with a ladder shot. Jericho is going up but Cena makes the save. Now Miz goes up but Kane throws a ladder at his back to put him down. Jericho stops Kane but Miz and Jericho combine to suplex Kane onto a ladder. Cena lays both of them out with shoulders and it’s a double Shuffle.

Kane comes back in and tries a chokeslam, but Cena escapes and hits the AA onto Miz onto a ladder. Chris takes Cena down and lays out everyone else, but here comes Big Show again. Show literally snaps the braces off the middle of the ladder with his bare hands and crushes Jericho between the legs of the ladder. Kane gets a ladder thrown on him and Miz gets chopped in the chest through the ropes. Cena gets crushed behind a ladder and Show throws a second ladder over the top rope and down onto Miz. There’s a pile of about eight ladders at ringside.

Show goes to the floor and pulls out the jumbo ladder from last year. After taking forever to set it up, Show makes the slow climb up, but Kane goes up the other side. Apparently he uses his powers of mesmerizing because Show stops dead when Kane is looking at him. Kane gets chokeslammed down but here comes Cena. John gets sent down as well so here’s Jericho with a chair.

A trio of shots finally takes Show off the ladder and it’s Jericho vs. Cena on the ladder. They bat the case back and forth until Cena loads up an AA on top of the ladder. Jericho escapes and hooks a sleeper, causing Cena to climb down instead. Actually scratch that as Cena climbs back up with Jericho on his back, but he finally goes out. Miz tries to sneak up but Jericho knocks him back down. Cena gets a hand on the case but he goes down again. The hold is broken and Jericho goes up, but Miz runs up the ladder and they’re fighting for the case.

Jericho is higher up so Miz knocks him back and Jericho is dangling. Miz pulls him back to the ladder and loads up a superplex, but here’s Show again. Jericho looks terrified so Show drills him in the head. Miz takes a punch as well but Cena runs the ladder and blocks the punch with the case. He blasts Show in the head with it enough times to knock Show down and Cena wins at 20:07.

Rating: B. This was as good as you would expect with the talent in there. The ending with everyone not named Kane fighting on the ladder was very cool, with someone being on the ladder for the better part of five minutes. Blocking the punch with the case was a good idea too, and Cena is really the right choice for this as no one else would have made sense. Good stuff here and a good way to end the show.

Cena’s face when he wins is hilarious as he looks so happy.

Overall Rating: B+. The matches that needed to hit did so very well, but there were some dull parts here. When you have a seven match card and three of the matches are added the day of the show, you can tell that there’s something going wrong. That being said, the show was very entertaining and that’s what a show like this is supposed to be. It’s nowhere near what last year’s show was, but given the lower level Raw and Smackdown are at at the moment, I can’t complain here at all.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

No Way Out 2012
Date: June 17, 2012
Location: IZOD Center, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Jerry Lawler

The show is back after a few years’ absence with the main event in a cage. It’s Cena vs. Big Show with Cena and Ace’s respective jobs on the line. Other than that we have Sheamus defending against a fill in challenger in the form of Ziggler, as well as Bryan vs. Punk vs. Kane in what should be a solid match. This card has the potential to be entertaining which is more than I would have said about Over the Limit. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: David Otunga vs. Brodus Clay

Otunga attacked Clay’s knee on Friday to set this up. Chimmel says Otunga is from Larvard Hart School. Brodus’ knee is taped up but he pounds Otunga into the corner very easily. Striker says that Brodus has an MCL sprain. Otunga finally uses that Larvard Hart brain and goes after the knee. He hooks a DDT onto the leg and a chop block gets two. Otunga gets the knee tied up in the ropes and hits a neckbreaker for no cover. Off to a front facelock but Brodus powers out of it. Brodus hits the headbutt to the chest and the suplex to send Otunga to the floor where he takes the countout at 5:45.

Rating: D+. The match was ok despite the weak ending. I guess this is going to continue which at least means Brodus has something to do. It would seem like they’re setting up Big Show vs. Brodus, likely at MITB, so putting him against another Ace crony makes sense. This got the fans going though which is the point of a match like this so it accomplished its goal in that regard.

The opening video of the PPV is about Big Show vs. Cena and their whole backstory.

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Dolph Ziggler

They do big match intros which at least makes this seem like it’s important. To be fair though there’s no story here and Ziggler is filling in so I can’t complain that much about it opening. Vickie kisses Ziggler on the cheek and Sheamus tries the Brogue Kick ala Wrestlemania. Ziggler gets to the floor and looks terrified. Back in and Sheamus takes over with a headlock onto the mat. Dolph gets up and hits a sweet dropkick to take Sheamus down.

That gets Ziggler nowhere though as Sheamus runs him over. The sleeper is quickly broken up as Sheamus sits him on the top rope (not in the corner), so Ziggler slaps him in the face. They go to the floor as the champion is fired up. Sheamus grabs the arm for a bit but Ziggler escapes to the top. His cross body is easily caught and an elbow to the face puts Dolph back down again.

The ten forearms are broken up and we get the rare apron fighting. Ziggler pulls the weakened shoulder into the post and Sheamus is slowed down for the first time in five minutes. A DDT gets two back in the ring for the challenger. Ziggler takes it to the mat and hooks a chinlock including the handstand. Sheamus breaks the hold but his Regal Roll is countered into another DDT for two.

The fans are chanting for Ziggler now. Back to the chinlock which was running long earlier on. Sheamus counters out of it but gets caught in a rollup with a hand on the ropes for two. Off to a modified crossface chickenwing with a bodyscissors by Ziggler but Sheamus powers out of it again very quickly. Brogue Kick misses and Ziggler grabs the sleeper which is quickly broken.

Dolph goes up but Sheamus “catches” him. I think it was supposed to be a slam position into a fireman’s carry but Sheamus dropped him. Sheamus shows off his brain though as he shifts to an Irish Curse position instead. That was a good save by the champion. Ziggler escapes White Noise and hits the Zig Zag for two. Sheamus pulls himself to the top but Dolph hits an X-Factor off the top for two. ANOTHER sleeper attempt is countered into the Irish Curse and there are the ten forearms. The sleeper is easily countered into White Noise and the Brogue Kick keeps the title at 15:04.

Rating: C-. This was working at times but the constant chinlocks/sleepers hurt it a lot. They were on different pages in there at times and it really brought things down. This wasn’t a bad match or anything but the chemistry was off the level that it usually hits for these two. The fans popped big for the Brogue Kick though and that’s the right idea. Good stuff considering it was a replacement match.

Vince is here and finds Ace in a red suit. Ace thinks there’s no need for a man with a concussion to be here. Show is guaranteeing victory so there’s no need for Vince to be here. Vince doesn’t say anything and walks into his office, shutting the door in Ace’s face. Josh comes up to talk to Ace, sending Johnny into a rant about how he has work to do tonight and tomorrow, so leave him alone.

Santino Marella vs. Ricardo Rodriguez

This is a tuxedo match and the logical conclusion to the feud between these two. Ricardo has his own music now which is much faster and perkier than Alberto’s. Both guys present themselves to the crowd to start and Santino seems to be the favorite. Ricardo makes first contact by ripping the pocket off. Santino: “THIS IS MY ONLY TUXEDO!” He rips Ricardo’s sleeve off and we get a few atomic drops.

Ricardo loses his jacket and it’s time for some bullfighting. Santino’s jacket is ripped up too. A drop toehold lets Santino get the shoes off and we get a LOUD boring chant. There goes Ricardo’s shirt and jacket but he comes back with a jawbreaker. Santino loads up the Cobra but Ricardo throws the sock into the crowd. He takes Santino down and removes the pants….revealing a Cobra sock. Santino kicks him in the neck and removes the pants for the win at 4:25. Ricardo wears Del Rio underwear.

Rating: D+. This was a comedy match and while it was funny at times, I’m with the fans. This belonged on Raw or Smackdown rather than second on a PPV. Hopefully this ends the feud or lets Alberto get the US Title off of Santino. It would do both of them some good, as Del Rio needs to be seasoned some more before he bores us in the main event.

Punk says he has no relationship with AJ and that he’ll overcome the odds tonight. AJ comes up and kisses him for good luck, but he says luck is for losers and leaves. AJ glares at Josh for some reason.

Intercontinental Title: Christian vs. Cody Rhodes

Christian is defending in this Over the Limit rematch. Feeling out process to start with Cody taking him to the mat with some kicks to the ribs. Christian comes back and sends Cody into the corner for a stalemate. Cody goes to the apron and tries to suplex the champ to the floor but gets dropped onto the apron instead. A dropkick to the floor puts Cody down but he comes back by ramming Christian into the apron.

Back in and Cody starts in on the arm but Christian slides to the floor. He tries to crotch Cody on the post but gets pulled into the post face first. Front suplex gets two on Christian and Rhodes pounds away in the corner. Off to a short arm scissors, but wasn’t it Christian’s ankle that was hurt on Raw? Christian goes up but Cody knocks him down and the shoulder hits the apron on the way to the floor.

Cody follows him out but walks into a tornado DDT off the steps to put both guys down. Back in and a dropkick gets two for the Canadian. Cody gets put into 619 position but Christian’s uppercut misses. Christian’s top rope cross body is rolled through, getting two for Cody. Cody reverses a victory roll but takes FOREVER going up. Another tornado DDT gets two but Christian is hurting.

Cody hits the Alabama Slam for two but walks into the reverse DDT. The champ loads up the spear but Cody drops to the floor. Back inside the sunset flip out of the corner is countered but Christian hits the Killswitch….for two. Frog Splash hits knees but the Disaster Kick misses. Killswitch is countered into another missed Disaster Kick, letting Christian spear him down to retain at 11:30.

Rating: B-. As much as I can’t stand the spear as a finisher anymore, the ending sequence was pretty freaking good with both guys hitting everything they had until Christian got the pin. That was a great false finish on the Killswitch and the fans were totally buying into Cody as a real threat after that. This was better than I was expecting and hopefully it lets Cody move on to the main event.

Usos vs. Titus O’Neal/Darren Young vs. Epico/Primo vs. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd

#1 contenders match, even though Epico and Primo already were #1 contenders. The crack production staff cuts away from Rosa dancing to show us AW giving Epico and Primo a pep talk on the pre show. Young and O’Neal are officially the Prime Time Players. That used to be my fantasy football team name so I’m liking them more and more. Booker: “They’re a little bit fruit bootyish if you know what I mean.” I think this is one fall to a finish with tags.

Titus and Jey starts things off but it’s quickly off to Young. You don’t have to tag your partner here either. Jimmy comes in quickly with a double chop for two on Darren. The Usos tag again and Epico tags himself in off a staggered Young. Jimmy hits a Bubba Bomb on Epico who tags in Justin for some reason. Justin and Jimmy hit a stalemate, followed by a Gabriel headlock.

Jey comes in and it’s the double Samoan Drop for two. Rosa yells a lot as Titus tags himself in for two on Justin. Off to Darren as Gabriel is in trouble. Justin gets in a kick but Primo tags himself in to prevent the hot tag. Epico hits a dropkick for two and it’s off to a chinlock. Apparently automatic rematch clauses expire after 30 days. Ok then. Epico hits rolling belly to back suplexes for two and it’s back to Primo.

He misses an elbow and there’s the tag to Kidd. Tyson fires off kicks and hits a suplex on Primo. Things break down a bit and the springboard elbow drop hits knees. Things break down even more and the Usos dive onto Titus and I think Epico. Young tags himself in but Tyson knocks him off the apron. In a SWEET spot, Kidd ranas Primo onto the other pile of people on the floor. Young and Primo are legal and the fireman’s carry into the gutbuster give Young and O’Neal the pin at 9:33.

Rating: C. For a bonus match, this was fine. Titus and Young are as good as a set of challengers as you can ask for right now and since there are more face teams on the roster than heels, it would make sense to give them the belts so we can have some more challengers. Decent stuff here and it’s good to see something resembling a division existing.

AW jumps ship to the winners post match. That fits him WAY better.

MITB ad, which is about Del Rio having all kinds of money. These ads featuring the wrestlers are a nice change of pace.

We recap HHH vs. Lesnar/Heyman, which is Brock Lesnar, the biggest PPV draw in the company, being used in a legal angle. And people wonder why the ratings are dropping over the summer.

Here’s HHH to address the situation, minus anything visible on his arm. He talks about how he’s spent over half of his life in the ring because he loves it and has never wanted to get a real job. Now he has a real job and it’s a corporate one. He hates having to do all of this corporate and legal stuff because he’s a fighter. That gave him an idea: Lesnar is supposed to be a fighter too, and HHH’s arm is healing. It should be healed somewhere in the middle of the summer. So how about we get rid of the lawyers and Heyman and get down to Lesnar vs. HHH, say at Summerslam? HHH wants it there and that’s it.

Bryan is in the back when AJ comes up. She says they’ve been through a lot but he says this isn’t the time. There’s still a part of her that hasn’t gotten over him but she doesn’t expect him to do anything about it. She wishes him luck and kisses him on the cheek, drawing a smile from him as AJ leaves.

Divas Title: Layla vs. Beth Phoenix

Layla grabs Beth’s waist to start but Beth gets the rope. Beth shoves her down and basically shouts a promo at her, talking about how she’ll win the title tonight. Layla gets the headband off Beth and mocks her poses. Layla takes her down and dances as Beth gets in a fetal position. End this NOW, please. The champion goes to the apron and kicks Beth in the face, only to get sent to the floor. Back in the Glam Slam is escaped so Beth shoves her down. Beth hooks a backbreaker and bends her over the knee. Layla climbs the corner (botching at the same time) to counter the Glam Slam before hitting a cross body out of the corner for two. A powerslam gets two for Beth but her press slam is countered into a DDT for two. Layout out of nowhere gets the pin at 6:56.

Rating: D. This match was one of the worst I’ve seen in years at first and then upgraded to bad to end it. The division is rapidly reaching new levels of horrible as we had about two minutes to build this match in the course of a month. Terrible match and Layla is really lacking since she’s gotten back.

AJ goes up to Kane but doesn’t have much to say. Kane grabs her arm and kisses her which she doesn’t seem to mind.

Hunico vs. Sin Cara

These two just can’t get away from each other can they? They speed things up to start and Hunico dropkicks him down. Cara snapmares him to the floor but his suicide dive is countered by a kick to the face. Back in and Hunico chops him down in the corner followed by a slingshot dropkick. Off to a chinlock as Cara is being grounded here. The fans want Ryder as Hunico hits a powerbomb for two. Cara hits a pair of headscissors followed by some kicks and the spinning mat slam gets the pin at 5:47.

Rating: D+. This was your usual Smackdown match. Cara is getting the same treatment a lot of people get anymore with these random wins over people that don’t really matter. It keeps him on TV though which is more important than almost anything short of giving him a story. This wasn’t horrible but it couldn’t be more of a filler match if they tried.

We recap the Raw triple threat which revolves around AJ. Bryan almost beat Punk last month and demanded a rematch, so Punk said cool. Kane beat them both on Smackdown so it’s a triple threat. AJ is involved because she’s psycho and awesome and may be in love with all three of them. She’s the wildcard here.

Raw World Title: Kane vs. Daniel Bryan vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending of course. After the big match intros we’re ready to go. Kane goes after Punk so Bryan kicks Kane. Uh….ok? Double chokeslam is broken up and they both kick the monster down. Stereo dropkicks put Kane down but they get in a fight over the cover as is the tradition in triple threats. They slug it out with Punk taking over, backdropping Bryan to the floor. A suicide dive by Punk is broken up by a Kane clothesline which gets two.

Bryan knocks Kane to the floor so Punk dives on both guys to take over. Kane stays on the floor and pulls Punk outside. He sends the champion into the barricade and uppercuts Bryan to block the knee from the apron. Kane bends Punk around the post and kicks him in the head for good measure. He sends Punk into the corner and fires off some knees to the head followed by the low dropkick for two.

Off to a bodyscissors which Punk quickly elbows his way out of. Bryan is back in and hits a running dropkick into the corner on Punk, but he jumps into the claws of Kane. Kane shrugs off a clothesline but a drop toehold sends him into the buckle. A kick sends him to the floor and it’s the small guys one on one again. Bryan goes up but gets caught by Punk. The champion loads up a superplex but Kane breaks it up. He breaks up a second attempt at one and Punk’s trunks come down for a second.

Kane tries the superplex now but Punk breaks it up. Bryan gets tired of waiting and hits a dropkick to both guys for two each. Both guys are on their knees so Bryan fires off kicks to both guys. A big kick to Kane’s head puts him down but Punk grabs a rollup for two. Kane gets in the corner and both guys take running knees. Neckbreaker gets two on Kane as Bryan makes the save. Snap powerslam gets two for Punk and he goes up for the Macho Elbow. Bryan tries a superplex but gets caught on Kane’s shoulders. Punk plays Hawk in a Doomsday Device but only gets two on Bryan.

A horrible looking Macho Elbow hits Bryan but since this isn’t Raw, it only gets two. Kane comes in before we can get the GTS and sends Punk to the apron. The champion hits a high kick but the Macho Elbow misses Kane. Bryan hits a Swan Dive on Punk for two. He low bridges Kane and knocks him to the floor but Punk rolls him up for two. A big kick to the head knocks Punk down and there’s the YES Lock. Bryan CRANKS on it but he cranks too hard, giving Punk a rollup for two ala Over the Limit.

GTS hits out of nowhere but Kane breaks up the cover. Kane comes back in with the top rope clothesline to Punk but the chokeslam is countered into a DDT for two. This time the Macho Elbow hits Kane but Punk can’t hit the GTS. Chokeslam kills Punk but it only gets two. Dang I thought that was it. Kane yells at the referee and sets up a tombstone. Punk escapes and AJ is on the apron. Kane gets sent into her and the GTS hits for Punk to retain at 18:16.

Rating: B. I was really digging this one although AJ continues to be almost a red herring. She was only there for about five seconds and Bryan was gone for the last five minutes of this. Still though, it’s good to see Punk retain as he continues his very long run as the #2 guy on Raw. Good match here though as they used Kane perfectly.

By the way that officially gives Punk the longest reign since Cena’s year long run in 06/07.

Kane carries AJ off and she has a very evil smile. Punk smiles back at her and I think something is afoot. Punk celebrates long enough that his song restarts.

Ryback vs. Dan Delaney/Rob Grymes

The jobbers say they’ll win and be in the main event of…..and they sing the Wrestlemania X song, complete with old school Mania music. I like these guys already. Double Samoan Drop, 1:30. Ryback shouted to give him three while he was holding them up. I hope that’s not what we get stuck with for the next few weeks.

The theme for Summerslam is Be A Star. Oh good grief.

The cage is lowered.

We get a LONG recap of this feud, which is basically Cena feuding with Ace because he’s the boss and Ace being somewhat corrupt. Show was brought back to keep Ace’s job so now the job is on the line again after Vince wanted to fire Ace but didn’t for some reason. Vince got “punched” in the “head” on Monday and has a concussion. If Cena loses tonight he’s fired and if Show loses Ace is fired.

Big Show vs. John Cena

You can win by pin, submission or escape. Vince and Ace are at ringside. Show shoves him down to start and then into the cage. Cena goes into the cage again but the WMD hits the wall. There’s the big chop in the corner as this has been all Show so far. Cena gets in a dropkick and goes for the door but is almost immediately pulled back. Show clotheslines him down and runs his mouth a lot.

Cena gets rammed into the cage again as this is a total squash so far. Show fires a punch into Cena’s ribs and walks around a lot. He crushes Cena in the corner and stands on the neck in front of the door. Cena FINALLY gets his feet up in the corner to slow Show down and a bulldog gets one. Cena gets up on top of the cage but Show pulls him back in. They both get on the top rope but Show gets crotched.

Instead of charging out the door as fast as he can, Cena fires off a shoulder block to ram Show into the cage. Cena climbs the cage like an idiot and gets powerbombed into the cage wall. Well he deserved that. A regular powerbomb gets two as does a Vader Bomb. Show grabs him by the throat and climbs to the top rope while still holding Cena’s neck. He picks Cena up off the mat to the top and drops him down to the mat. Seems counter productive but whatever.

Show drops an elbow off the top but Cena rolls away to prevent a bad case of death. The ring literally shook as he landed. Show tries to crawl out the door and gets his hand on the floor but Cena pulls him back in. Cena goes for the door but gets pulled back in as well. Chokeslam is countered and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Cena goes for the door but Ace knocks the referee down. Vince stops it but Ace shoves Vince into the door which goes into Cena’s head. Chokeslam gets two.

Show loads up the WMD but it hits the referee of course. AA is avoided and Show hits the WMD on Cena. Show is the only one up and there’s no referee. He goes for the door but Brodus Clay is waiting with a chair. Doesn’t that mean he’s fired now? Instead Show starts to climb and Brodus rolls his eyes before stepping two feet to the left so he’s in front of Show again.

Show is frustrated so Brodus waves out Riley and Santino, guys that Show knocked out. They get knocked down so Brodus waves out Ryder. Kofi comes out and gets to the top of the cage and knocks Show to the mat. Cena crawls towards the door but Show grabs the leg. They go back into the ring and the AA puts Big Show down. There’s no referee as Cena covers so he climbs up instead. Brodus has the door covered but Ace blocks Cena’s way out. Brodus goes over and subdues Ace so Cena can escape and win at 19:48.

Rating: C-. This had about 10 minutes of action in a nearly 20 minute match. The ending made sense and was overdone, but it was probably better than the other alternative. Cena winning was the pretty obvious choice but I can’t imagine Ace is going to be gone for more than about two weeks or so. The match wasn’t what I would call good but it was ok I guess. The laying around got REALLY boring though.

Post match Vince fires Ace and Cena gives Ace an AA through the table, because that’s just the kind of guy he is.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t what I’d call a bad show but it was pretty underwhelming. Ace getting fired is good at the moment but I can’t imagine it’ll be a lasting decision. The triple threat was by far the best match of the night but it’s clear that the injuries and suspensions are crippling these guys at the moment. Clearly the solution is to have more squash matches because we COULDN’T just bring someone else up on the roster right? Passable show but it’s nothing great at all.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: August 22, 2006
Location: Wachovia Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re past Summerslam now and Big Show is still champion, having beaten Sabu at Summerslam. The main event tonight: Big Show vs. Sabu for the ECW Championship. We also have Matt Striker, who is making his ECW debut tonight after a long time on Raw. We also get a bikini contest between Kelly and Torrie, which I’m sure will be riveting. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.

We open with Torrie and Kelly in their bikini contest. Torrie is in FHM this month. She disrobes first and looks good but Mike Knox stops Kelly from disrobing. Test is with him for the sake of setting up a six man tag. Dreamer and Sandman come in and we’re ready to go.

Torrie Wilson/Tommy Dreamer/Sandman vs. Test/Mike Knox/Kelly Kelly

The girls go at it quickly and the fans freak out. Torrie is in a bikini so we get a Stinkface. So that’s where Kelly learned it. Test and Dreamer come in, thank goodness, with Test poking him in the eye to take over. A trio of backbreakers gets two. Knox comes in and stays on the back of Dreamer as the fans tell Knox that he can’t wrestle.

Test comes in and takes out Sandman before throwing Dreamer in a bearhug. Dreamer finally gets out and hooks a neckbreaker to give himself a breather. Off to Sandman and Knox but it’s Test who gets caught in the White Russian Legsweep. Sandman hits a Swanton (Rolling Rock) on Knox for two. After some interference from Test, Knox misses a middle rope legdrop. Dreamer DDT gets the pin on Knox.

Rating: D. This was a mess and the girls didn’t add anything to it, but they were only involved for about 30 seconds so it’s not that big of a deal. The match was boring though as it was just old school vs. new school which would be the story on this show for months on end. Sandman was a nostalgia act at this point but he got paid for a few months out of it so I can’t complain much there. Not a good match but it got the crowd a bit fired up so I can’t complain much.

Show tells Heyman not to worry tonight because it’s a one on one match with no weapons for Sabu to use.

Matt Striker is in the back and says he’s our teacher. The letters ECW bring about images of barbarism but those aren’t good. Therefore, he’s going to educate us in the future.

Kevin Thorn vs. Balls Mahoney

Extreme Rules. Thorn jumps Balls before he can use the chair and we’re off fast. Balls comes back with right hands and a HARD kick to the face. Out to the floor for a good beating of balls. Back in and Thorn beats Balls with a stick. These jokes write themselves. The stick gets rammed into Balls’ throat (there is such a thing as making this too easy you know) but Mahoney comes back with punches and the Nutcracker Sweet for two. Balls goes to get a chair but Ariel bites him on the way back in. A chair shot and the elevated Stunner get the pin for Thorn. Quick match with more unintentional comedy than anything else.

More Shannon Moore stuff. The system is oppressive I see.

CM Punk vs. Christopher W. Anderson

He’s doing the IT’S CLOBBERIN TIME already. Anderson is introduced as Christopher W. Anderson but screw that, he’s CW Anderson. Anderson takes him into the corner and we actually get a clean break. Joey and Tazz argue over how much coffee Anderson had in the original ECW. They go to the corner again and Anderson kills him with the left, resulting in a left/right joke series from our commentators. Anderson works on the arm in the corner but gets caught in the Vice around the ropes. The knee/bulldog combination conencts but Punk walks into a spinebuster for two. Never mind as it’s strike sequence, Rock Bottom, Vice, tap.

Sabu says he’ll win tonight.

Trailer for The Marine.

Heyman talks to someone and tells them to make an impact tonight. It’s Hardcore Holly and Heyman whispers a name to Holly which Hardcore isn’t thrilled with. Whoever he whispered has been making trouble for Holly in the locker room.

Danny Doring vs. Rob Van Dam

Doring tries to speed things up but gets his head kicked off instead. Danny drops some elbows on the back to take over but Van Dam has had enough of that. The monkey flip sets up the top rope kick and Doring is in trouble. Rolling Thunder hits and the Five Star finishes the squash.

Post match Hardcore Holly jumps Van Dam with a chair. He hits Doring for good measure before giving Van Dam the Alabama Slam.

Highlight video of Summerslam.

Rene Dupree says he’s the best athlete ECW has ever had.

ECW Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Sabu pounds away to start but gets beaten down almost as quickly. Some LOUD chops put Sabu down so Show picks him up and drops Sabu onto the top rope and out to the floor. We take a break and come back with Show choking away even more. During the break there’s been a table set up at ringside, apparently to taunt Sabu.

Sabu breaks up a bearhug with a poke to the eye. The referee goes down, as does Sabu to a fallaway slam. Sabu uses the referee being down to get some chair shots in, taking Big Show down. Triple Jump Moonsault hits but there’s no referee. Arabian Facebuster hits and a second referee counts two. Sabu gets the bell and clocks Show with it in front of the referee for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This didn’t really have time to do anything, but it wasn’t all that interesting watching Sabu get thrown around and then a ref bump followed by a stupid DQ. These two would feud for awhile while we waited to get something better going in the main event. This was fine for a filler feud though.

Post match Sabu hits him again with the bell, busting Show open. He knocks him through the table (great sound effect) and HOKEY SMOKE Show is busted bad. There’s a freaking pool of blood on the ground. It’s legit scary looking actually.

Overall Rating: D+. It wasn’t a great show, but there was a major shift this week as the main event only ran about five minutes (not counting commercial) as opposed to the usual 15 minutes or so it had been getting up to this point. That can be seen as either good or bad, in that it gives more time to other acts, but it also takes away the long match. In ECW’s case though, with just an hour a week, spending ¼ of the show on a single match wasn’t the best idea. The shift here is good and the show had a lot more to it as a result. The problem is the additional stuff here wasn’t that great.

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ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: August 22, 2006
Location: Verizon Center, Washington D.C.
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re back for another episode and it’s the last show before Summerslam. That being said, Big Show needs an opponent. We saw the return of Rob Van Dam last week to attack both Big Show and Sabu, so my guess is it’ll be Van Dam or Sabu challenging Show on Sunday. Is that a ladder I see over there? Let’s get to it.

We open with Heyman and Show in the back. Heyman says that Angle has been injured and is medically suspended for the time being. He was supposed to be in the ladder match later on, but now it’s just Van Dam vs. Sabu.

Here’s Foley in the arena. We get a clip of Melina and Foley beating up Flair last night. This was to set up their match at Summerslam which is pretty forgotten today. Foley talks about how last night he invited Flair to come here tonight but Naitch isn’t going to be here. This is because of a real life argument they had over Flair calling Foley a glorified stuntman and Foley saying Flair had the same match for years.

Foley goes into a big rant about what he went through against Undertaker in the Cell, which Flair says was just accidentally falling off the Cell. What Flair never gets is that Foley has always liked what he sees when he looks in the mirror, and that’s what he’ll do on Monday after the match with Ric. He talks about being a two time bestselling author and calls out…..Kelly Kelly?

Here she is and with a much slower version of her signature song. He also brings out Melina which is a big shock to Tazz for some reason. Foley says it’s time for a three way dance, so the girls grind on each other and Foley dances like Dude Love. This draws out Flair and the fight is on. A low blow stops Mick and Flair takes off his belt to whip Foley, followed by some choking. Flair shouts about how Foley is going to quit on Sunday and leaves. This was a, shall we say, interesting use of the first ten minutes of the show.

Shannon Moore says to question authority.

CM Punk vs. Justin Credible

Justin slaps him and gets kicked as a result. Into the corner and Punk does Joe’s Facewash for two. A top rope crossbody is countered into a gutbuster for two for Credible. Abdominal stretch goes on for a bit but Punk comes back with strikes. A bad kind of release tornado DDT gets two. Punk comes back with the knee in the corner, a high kick, a Rock Bottom and the Vice for the tap out. Short match but it did its job.

Video on RVD. This is followed by him sitting on a ladder, talking about being in MITB at Wrestlemania. He won that as well as the world title, and now he wants it back.

Rene Dupree is still coming.

Mike Knox/Test vs. Little Guido/Tony Marmaluke

Guido and Knox starts and the beating begins. Test comes in and the beating continues. The beating ends with a pair of big boots and a TKO to Mamaluke. Total squash.

Dreamer and Sandman chase off Knox and Test post match.

Sabu says he’ll win.

Heyman talks to Show and the security guards when Angle runs in. He beats up the security with ease and hammers on Big Show but finally gets taken down. Cops show up to handcuff Angle and take him out.

Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu

Ladder match and the winner gets Big Show on Sunday. Feeling out process to start and we get our first possible botch as Van Dam tries his springboard kick out of the corner but it hits Sabu in the leg as he was trying something else at the same time. Van Dam goes up but gets stopped by some shots to the face. Sabu tries Air Sabu but gets crotched in another botch. This REALLY isn’t starting out well.

Van Dam tries to jump from the top to get the contract which I’m surprised more people haven’t tried before. A Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor and Sabu goes for the first ladder. Van Dam makes the save and both guys head back in, sans ladder. A spike DDT puts Rob down and now we get the first ladder brought in. Scratch that as Van Dam hits a baseball slide into the ladder to keep it on the floor.

Van Dam hits a dive onto Sabu and the ladder as we take a break. Back with Sabu hitting the Arabian Facebuster onto the ladder. There’s the camel clutch, also on the ladder but it’s broken very quickly. Sabu sets the ladder up but Van Dam shoves it down before he can get anywhere. Sabu tries the triple jump moonsault using the ladder and falls flat on his back. Rob throws him into the ladder in the corner but misses a charge. In a GREAT counter, Van Dam monkey flips the ladder itself into Sabu. That was awesome.

Rolling Thunder hits onto Sabu onto the ladder, but it was minus Sabu and Van Dam’s back is hurt. Now the triple jump moonsault hits as Sabu used the chair instead of the ladder like a freaking idiot would. Van Dam gets in another shot and goes up the ladder but Sabu makes a quick save. Sabu goes to his old standard: throwing the ladder at Van Dam’s head.

Van Dam kicks him down again and hits the Five Star but it only does so much good here. His ribs are more messed up than they already were but he goes up anyway. Sabu is down on the floor, so there’s no reason for Van Dam to go slowly, other than Big Show missing his cue as he does here. Show FINALLY comes in and throws Van Dam off the ladder and through a table. Show calls for the contract to be lowered but Sabu dives at him and lands in a powerbomb position, but it’s enough to grab the lowered contract and get the title shot.

Rating: D. You know how I always talk about how Sabu needs someone to keep him calmed down or it can get ugly? This was what happens when it gets ugly. Some of these botches were just HORRIBLE and it ruined whatever they might have had going with the match. The monkey flip spot was great and the ending was creative, but the stuff getting up to that was just horrible.

Show chokeslams Sabu onto the contract (despite having a chair and a ladder in the ring) and chokeslams RVD as well. Sabu eats the contract to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show FLEW by and I’m not sure it worked for the most part. The main event was too sloppy to be worth much, the opening segment was about a Raw issue instead of an ECW issue, and the other two matches were squashes. It wasn’t a horrible show I guess, but it went by so fast with so little happening that it really didn’t have a chance to be good.

Here’s Summerslam if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/09/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2006-hogan-and-dx-are-in-charge-are-we-in-1998/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews