In Your House 23: Fully Loaded
Date: July 26, 1998
Location: Selland Arena, Fresno, California
Attendance: 9,855
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

So King of the Ring has come and gone and as I’ve gone over, we know what the double main event was and I’m sure you all know what happened in those matches so I’ll spare you the details. Ken Shamrock is your new king and that went absolutely nowhere. Not a lot really happened other than the main events but the Raws were the big deal for your buildup here. The main thing going on at the time was Austin feuding with just about everyone with Taker slowly becoming a tweener.

Your main event is Austin and Taker trying to get the tag titles from the new champions Kane and mankind. It was all leading up to the big feud with Taker and Kane against Austin, eventually being revealed as being masterminded by Vince himself. In reality, this show was more of a catalyst than a big show, but that doesn’t mean it’s bad. Let’s see if it is or not.

Oh I almost forgot: a guy that walked the streets and subways, screaming because he was bordering on being completely psychotic and beating up random people had debuted about a month before this. His name was a strange one: Edge.

The intro more or less just talks about how Austin has been facing everyone and somehow still has the title. Nothing special here at all but it gets the job done I suppose.

Val Venis vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett now has the Godwinns, now known as Southern Justice, as his bodyguards. Venis was controversial to say the least as he is likely the most envelope pushing character in company history as he jumped WAY over the line many times. However, he was a very  good wrestler that is often overlooked. Kaientai of all people come to the ring with their boss doing commentary and clearly doing an impression of a Japanese accent.

Their feud was over his wife sleeping with Val and appearing in one of his “videos.” This would end up with Val allegedly being castrated on Raw which was freaking creepy at the time and actually ended the show which was odd indeed. It also involved Taka turning heel and completely killing the division. Jarrett hits a DDT and the comments are great from both guys.

Ross says that anyone would go limp from that, which Lawler says he planted him like a geranium. What kind of a comparison is that? Venis really was underrated in the ring. He’s got a nice variety of offense which is a rare thing to see and he rarely made any noticeable mistakes. Apparently Austin thinks Taker is going to turn on him and that it’ll be 3-1 in the main event.

Val eventually wins it with a roll up as Yamaguchi continues to say that he’ll never be the same after Raw tomorrow. He’s really short so he gets a lot of jokes for that. Val gets on the mic and says that Yamaguchi is small and his wife says so.

Rating: B. This was a very decent match as both guys can really go in the ring when they’re given the chance. Val was the hot shot rookie and he showed why he was here. He had a nice variety of offense, a very unique gimmick a good look, size, strength and agility. Put him in there with a good technician like Jarrett and how could this be bad?

We see a shot of the Hart Family Dungeon where there will be a match tonight.

D’lo Brown vs. X-Pac

This is just a continuation of the DX/NOD feud but the real match would have been later tonight between Rock and HHH in an Iron Man match. Brown beat HHH for the European Title on Monday for no apparent reason as the Iron Man was supposed to be title vs. title. I was at a house show the Friday before that Raw so 10 days before this where D’lo was already billed as champion despite not winning the title until three days later.

Kama is now the Godfather of the Nation and is dressing like a pimp. This is non title for no good reason. There’s a bikini contest tonight with Sable and Jackie so King simply will not shut up about it. Other than that, this match is painfully boring. I can’t stand X-Pac but this is just bad no matter who is in it. The crowd is completely dead and in a ten minute match you should not need three rest holds. Godfather interferes and D’Lo hits the Sky High for the pin.

Rating: D. This was a very boring match. It wasn’t any good at all and while I can’t put the blame on either guy more than the other, I’m going to blame X-Pac because I hate that little bastard. This really was just a bad match and the non-title didn’t help it. It just gave us even less of a reason to care here so why should this be any good at all?

Apparently the Undertaker isn’t here yet.

Farrooq/Scorpio vs. Terry Funk/Bradshaw

Anyone that can find the point to this match will receive a free ham sandwich. As the other team heads to the ring, Funk says that this will be his last match in the WWF for at least six months, thereby ticking off Bradshaw. From what I can find, this wasn’t actually told to Bradshaw until just then so his reaction was legit. It pretty much left him without anything to do but he and Farrooq would join up around November.

The amazing part is that Funk actually did leave after this and wasn’t seen on a mainstream show until he showed up in WCW about two years later. The main thing here is all about Taker not showing up yet and Funk leaving soon. Other than that, this match is bad. The fans agree apparently as they start the boring chant which is actually acknowledged.

It’s just nothing of note at all here with a powerslam by Farrooq when Bradshaw jumps from the ropes being the only thing decent at all. Funk won’t tag out and in the big brawl Scorpio pins him after a 450. Bradshaw then beats all three of them up as he turns heel.

Rating: D. This was just bland as heck and no one was interested at all. It would have been fine on Raw I guess, but this had no business being on a PPV. The wrestling wasn’t that good, there was no story or build and no one really seemed to care that a 54 year old man was leaving. Can you blame them really?

Vader vs. Mark Henry

Apparently they had a tug of war or something on Shotgun Saturday Night which is a show I should review in a lot more detail someday. I just do not get what Vince’s problem is. Mark Henry is described by JR as still being raw and a rookie when he’s been in the company and a professional for over two years at this point. Vader has been a three time world champion in WCW.

The crowd is chanting VADER for the majority of the match. So how does the booking go of course? Henry gets his head handed to him for the majority of the match and hits two moves to win it. He kicks out of a move that more or less is the Vader Bomb, hits a bad powerslam and a splash to win it. WHAT THE HECK IS YOUR PROBLEM VINCE MCMAHON???

Why in the world would you not push a guy like Vader but have Mark freaking Henry still be a big deal? It’s been 13 years and he’s the same worker he was back then. Why in the world was he kept around when he gets hurt every five minutes while Vader is getting cheers but can’t keep a job?

Vader is clearly getting in better shape too as he’s visibly not as fat but more muscular and maybe a hair faster, while Henry’s chest looks rather horrible. Seriously, Vince needs to get his head some fresh air.

Rating: C. Vader of course does all the work and makes Henry’s level of suck reach only that of a vacuum and not a tornado. Henry botched a slam at the beginning of this match. Do you realize how difficult it is to botch a slam? It’s the most basic move there is after a punch. The sad thing is he could still botch it today and likely has. This just had me shaking my head and making me a bit angry. There was no sense at all to do this to Vader.

The Outlaws say they’ll be watching this next match closely.

LOD vs. DOA

Dang was there a spelling bee coming up with all of these abbreviations or something? Anyway, this is the convergence of two storylines in one as Paul Ellering, LOD’s mentor and the only person that’s ever been able to control them left them for the DOA a few weeks ago.

This was combined with the beginning of Hawk’s alcoholism storyline which evolved into a drug problem which evolved into him falling off of the top of the big screen one night which evolved into a storyline that a lot of people got a bad taste in their mouths because of. It just never felt right. Once again, Vince runs down another very over team in exchange for a copy of them, in this case the DOA. Anyway, this one is short and we don’t really see any effect of Hawk’s “condition.”

It’s fast for the most part with a standard tag team formula of faces dominate, heels take over, hot tag, finish. There’s nothing wrong with that and it works pretty well here. Animal even uses a dropkick and a pretty good one at that. He always was the more polished of the two. Anyway, the finish here is fairly simple: switch after the Doomsday Device leads to the pin. The main thing here was DOA’s manager being crazy according to Ross, but he really just acts like a normal heel manager. There’s nothing really all that crazy about him when you watch this match, so I guess there was a promo or something like that where his craziness was more explained. Either way, this was what you would expect from two teams like this.

Rating: B. Not bad but given the four guys out there, this was as good as it was going to get. Hawk gets beat up, tags Animal who cleans house, and then since the LOD was dominant in the 80s, Vince says screw you to the fans and pushes another team to the moon who never did anything in the company.

Dungeon Match: Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

This is in the famous Hart Family Dungeon for absolutely no reason at all. In something else that there’s no point to, Dan Severn, Shamrock’s UFC rival is the referee. He wrestled as the NWA Champion forever and has a four year reign to his credit, but it was during the time when the company was completely dead. He was at an MMA tournament in Japan when he was called on to defend the title at a PPV called TNA.

He had to forfeit and Shamrock became the first TNA Champion. Anyway, Owen and Shamrock are apparently feuding so we’re having a match in Owen’s basement. This seriously looks like a homemade wrestling project that would be thrown on YouTube or something. Severn just leaning against the window when Shamrock makes his entrance amuses me for some reason. Anyway, this is submission only.

This looks dangerously close to a shoot with how hard they’re hitting each other in there. You get some very stiff shots into the wooden walls and they use the water pipe to get in the air. I’m really not sure if this is terrible or awesome. Anyway, they beat on each other for a bit until Owen, and I wish I was making this up, lifts Shamrock into the air and his head goes through the ceiling.

Anyone else thing that just sounds funny? Anyway, they brawl a bit more but Shamrock kicks Severn in the head, allowing Owen to grab a dumbbell and smash Shamrock in the head. He locks on a crossface and then taps Shamrock for him as Severn is waking up to declare Owen the winner. Owen goes through the dungeon (which is one room) and into the garage to leave. This didn’t last five minutes.

Rating: C. I gave it a C because I have no idea what to say about this. It was a cross between wrestling, UFC and backyard fighting. The whole thing was meant I think as just a way to have a novelty but it was somewhere in between sweet and terrible. Really just a weird thing.

In the back, Vince says that he has a replacement partner in case Taker doesn’t show up: Brooklyn Brawler.

Recap of HHH vs. Rock, which was supposed to be title for title as previously mentioned.

IC Title: HHH vs. Rock

This is two out of three falls. One thing I’ve never liked about 2/3 falls: pretty much whoever wins the first fall should be the champion shouldn’t they, at least if it’s by pin or submission? I mean, they beat the champion in a title match in a way by which the title can change hands. Also, for some reason I love HHH’s tights here.

This is yet again a match where DX and the Nation are there and have no real point of being there other than to act as a bunch of seconds. After the 37 other people clear out of the ring it’s time to get going. Slaughter sends off a bunch of people and only lets Chyna stay out there because she has a legit manager’s license. I’d love to take that test.

Crotch chop by HHH and it’s on. We have a thirty minute time limit which is likely going to come into play here. Chyna drills Rock behind the referee’s back as you can tell they’re in for a long one here. We brawl up the aisle a bit and HHH controls. Jerry asks an interesting question: if they’re both counted out is that one fall apiece or just the first fall?

Game gets sent into the steps and Rock starts dominating. The fans think Rocky Sucks. Back in the ring the momentum changes again. These two are far better at emitting emotion in a match than most guys are today. You get the feeling that this could end at anytime rather than just killing time until the finish.

With Rock distracting the referee Mark Henry comes down and splashes HHH. Billy Gunn comes out for the save and Henry heads to the back. Rock gets a belt shot for two. We hit a chinlock as Rock gets to run some time off. All Rock at this point. Dang Rock looks like he’s roided up something huge here. I mean he’s always been a big guy but he looks muscular here.

Back to that chinlock as we’re probably about 15 minutes into this. HHH gets some comeback offense in and hits the knee to the face. Rock grabs him and throws him at the top rope for a hot shot. Here comes Godfather but the Outlaws run out before he can even make it to the mats at ringside.

Rock keeps shoving the referee but it’s a distraction so that D’Lo can come in with the European Title but HHH stops him. He walks into a Rock Bottom to make it 1-0 Rock though. We have a one minute rest period now. Rock beats him up for awhile but gets sent into the railing. He pops off of that and KILLS Rock with a clothesline.

People’s Elbow hits as Brown is getting back up for two. HHH gets a big clothesline and both guys are down. We’re under 10 minutes to go here and Brown is getting back up. Chyna takes him out and while she’s being reprimanded, X-Pac runs down for an X Factor for two. Rock brings in a chair but accidentally pops the referee with it.

With no referee Chyna runs in for a low blow and a DDT on a chair. You might notice the high level of the term RUN-IN here. That evens us at one fall with about 5 minutes to go. After the rest period other referees have come out to help their fallen official so there’s no referee there. We only have two minutes left.

HHH gets all fired up as Hebner is here now. Facebuster sets up the 6th crotch chop and a big clothesline for two at a minute left. Samoan Drop puts HHH down for two as they were moving there for a bit.

They slug it out and Rock sets for the Rock Bottom but HHH counters into a SWEET Pedigree as the time is up. Oh man the fans are not happy. The Nation and DX come out for the big beatdown. HHH would get one last shot at the title in August at Summerslam and to say it blows this away is an understatement.

Rating: C+. I HATE the ending here. Who in the world books a 2/3 falls match to end in a time limit? That makes absolutely no sense at all to me. They’re getting close to the big blowoff to this match next month which is light years ahead of this, so this was fine I guess. It kept us from having a definitive end to the feud and it makes HHH’s win next month all the sweeter because we now know he can beat the Rock.

The main issue here is the amount of run-ins. Everybody comes in and the announcement of the time limit at the start more or less gave it away. This feud was the one that made both of these guys stars but it is NOTHING compared to what they would do two years later. I can’t wait to get to that iron man match.

Bikini Contest: Sable vs. Jackie

See, I told you Sable would be back. Before this starts, Dustin Rhodes comes out and leads us in a prayer, asking for forgiveness for those that watch what’s coming. This was a really weird period in his career that he was more or less a preacher. He would eventually start saying He is coming back, inferring Jesus but of course meaning Goldust.

Lawler is your moderator of this. Jackie is the annoying woman that allegedly is hot but no one else has ever seemed to see that in her. She’s with Mero now and no one could care less. She’s in a robe, Sable is in a t-shirt. Jackie goes first and has a red one piece on that’s more or less a pair of suspenders. Definite nip slip here as it’s easily visible and she covers it up after she’s done dancing badly.

Sable takes hers off and has on a half shirt and a thong. She says that Vince, who apparently is the way she got back into the company, said she should wear something more conservative. I think that was supposed to be a kind of sleeping with the boss story or at least an implied one but nothing ever came of it.

Anyway, she says it’s live TV and there’s nothing Vince can do so she pulls her half shirt off to reveal painted handprints with pasties over the nipples. Of course she wins and of course Vince comes and covers her up with his coat. The next night they reversed it, saying that wasn’t a bikini because we have to waste some time on all Raws.

Rating: F. This was freaking stupid and not even a decent contest. This was just bad.

Recap of the main event feud that is complicated to say the least. It was Russo’s magnum opus as it was a year long storyline that culminated with the swerve to end all swerves as Vince goes so far as to terrorize his own family due to his obsession with making Austin’s life a nightmare.

That would come later though as at the moment the main story was that Vince, Taker and Kane were part of a conspiracy against Austin. This started because Austin hit Taker with a chair by mistake when Taker was trying to help Austin against Kane and Mankind. After that Taker was seen going into his own locker room with Kane standing in it. That led to the theory that Taker was in on it.

Tag Titles: Taker/Austin vs. Mankind/Kane

The heels won the titles from the Outlaws on Raw a few weeks ago. Taker comes out to new music after getting there twenty minutes ago apparently. This is exactly what you would expect from a main event tag match with these four, but it’s given nearly half an hour. All four guys beat on each other and the tension between Austin and Taker is clear. They brawl on the floor, in the ring and all over the place.

It’s very hard to comment on a match like this because the first 15-20 minutes or so are just what you would expect in a match like this with very little of note. Austin keeps hitting stunners but there are kickouts every time or someone interferes. It’s a good match, but I really don’t get why the titles had to be involved.

Putting two guys that are big singles stars as tag champions rarely if ever works and it didn’t here, as the faces win but lost them back I think either the next night or 8 days later. Taker wins it with a tombstone on Kane.

Rating: B+. This was fine, but it made no sense to change the titles back so fast. It was Russo 101 to make them just a prop, which I’ve always hated deeply. Seriously, what’s the point in just making the belts a thing to advance a storyline? They should be on the top tag team, which they did about two weeks later when the Outlaws got them back. The wrestling was top quality with four great workers in there at the top of their game. Great match, but I’m not wild on the storyline.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is bad. There are two matches on it worth anything and one is a horrible ending. The main event is solid but it certainly can’t save the show. Aside from that and the opening match, the show is just a waste. Nothing of note happens and the two good matches certainly can’t save it.

The rest of the card is just random filler that few cared about. It would get a lot better soon though as the real glory days of the Attitude Era were on the horizon. Skip this for sure though and go grab Summerslam which is light years better and a very solid show.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 13, 1998
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,569
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Shawn Michaels

Well we have two Raws to go before Fully Loaded which is just a big preview for Summerslam anyway, which the company more or less admitted to. That strategy wound up working as Summerslam was huge that year. The main event tonight is the tag title match with Kane/Mankind challenging the Outlaws. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from the end of last week’s show where Undertaker impersonated Kane and became #1 contender.

Raw opens up….and my goodness Shawn Michaels is here. He hasn’t been seen since Wrestlemania. He sits in on commentary and even kisses Lawler on the cheek. Shawn is going to be here for the rest of the night too. That’s something he’d be perfect for today actually.

Vader vs. Undertaker

Imagine this match if they were both in their primes. My goodness. Austin vs. Taker is officially announced for Summerslam. Kane comes out as well after the guys in the match do. He shoots the fire out of the corners and Taker jumps Vader. Vader slugs Taker down and pounds him down in the corner. I kid you not: Taker hits a Fameasser for two. That sounds like something out of a video game. Out to the floor with Bearer and Mankind out with Kane. Back in Vader powerslams him (minus most of the power) and a splash gets two. A middle rope splash gets two on Taker. He pops up, chokeslam, tombstone, pin.

Rating: C. This is exactly what guys who are over the hill like Vader should be doing. Vader was still a big enough guy that he could be considered a threat so having him lose to big names is a good way to keep the big names looking strong while not wasting big matches. Guys like Vader at this stage of his career don’t exist nearly as much anymore and that’s a real shame.

Mankind goes to hit Taker with a chair but Kane stops it for unknown reasons. Another reason JR is awesome: he points out the two possibilities of Kane either wanting to do it himself or saving his brother. That’s what a commentator can be great at: being a guide.

Brawl For All First Round: Bart Gunn vs. Bob Holly

The New Midnight Express collides! Cornette has resigned as their manager because of this. The announcers spend the intros absolutely burying WCW for their horrible Bash at the Beach PPV the night before with Karl Malone and Dennis Rodman in the main event. I gave it a rating of not acceptable if that tells you anything. Bart Gunn was the surprise in this tournament but it doesn’t make this interesting. Bart wins by decision. They get in a fight post match.

We get some clips from the DX Nation parody last week.

The guy that played Owen does some of him impressions on commentary. His Shawn is GREAT. So is his Austin. The Nation pops up on screen and says they’re looking for DX. Jason (impression guy) does some more Owen until the real one comes out and puts him in the Sharpshooter. DX comes out for the save as does the Nation.

Rock/Owen Hart vs. HHH/X-Pac

It’s a brawl to start with HHH and Owen staying in the ring. Rock vs. HHH in a 2/3 falls title for title match is announced for Fully Loaded. Rocky and Pac start us off and a Samoan Drop gets two. Owen hits a top rope elbow for two. Pac tries to speed things up but Owen can go step for step with him. Back to Rock and X-Pac can’t do anything with him either. A slam sets up the People’s Elbow for two. Owen distracts the referee so Rock can hit X-Pac low, but it lets HHH get a belt shot to put him down. Rock breaks up a tag but walks into an X-Factor for the surprise pin. HHH was never in the match.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but the ending was kind of surprising. I like that it came out of nowhere because it’s not something that you see coming. Most matches today are structured and go on the same formula so it’s very nice to be able to have a match that is nowhere near the formula but still works.

Marc Mero vs. Steve Blackman

Sable comes out for commentary. She still can’t comment on her relationship with Vince. Shawn calls Jacqueline Sexual Chocolate. Blackman takes over to start with slams and strikes. He keeps control and the girls get into it. Mero low blows Blackman and a Samoan Drop, but Jackie and Sable distract him and a bicycle kick gets the pin for Blackman.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Kane/Mankind

Undertaker comes out as well. Mankind and Billy start but it’s quickly off to Road Dogg. Billy hammers on Mankind as the champs have tagged twice in just a few seconds. Chyna hits Mankind in his bad shoulder with a belt to give the Outlaws the advantage. Billy jumps off the middle rope into the Claw but Roadie saves him. Here’s Kane and Billy’s punches have no effect at all.

Kane shoves Gunn down and the beating begins. Billy is sent outside and Mankind throws him knees first into the steps. Taker has done nothing at all in this so far other than watch. Owen and Rock come out as Mankind comes back in. Mankind charges into Billy and they ram heads. Road Dogg and Kane come in but Roadie can’t hurt him either. Piledriver takes Mankind down as DX comes out to fight the Nation. Fameasser puts Kane down as does a Russian legsweep, but D’Lo comes off the top with the Lo Down to Road Dogg. A tombstone gives the monsters the titles.

Rating: D+. This was Attitude Era 101: total insanity ending with a run-in to change a title. The monsters would only hold them for a few weeks but would then get them back. It would lead up to Summerslam and the rematch where someone turns on someone else. It’s not a great match but if you’re watching for the wrestling in this one, you really don’t get the point.

HHH complains to Vince about what just happened.

Kai En Tai vs. Too Much/Taka Michinoku

Too Much starts fast and hits a Hart Attack on Funaki. Off to Togo who gets suplexed by Scotty. Taka comes in to speed things up and calls for the Michinoku Driver. Kai En Tai continues their speed stuff to stop Taka but he makes the tag to Brian. A powerbomb puts Togo down and Too Much uses some double teaming to get two. Scotty uses the Worm’s grandfather but Togo moves. A moonsault gets two for Dick. Taka and Scott get in an argument, resulting in Scotty taking a senton backsplash to end this. Not enough to grade but it was mostly a mess.

Too Much throws Taka to the floor….and here’s Val. He didn’t like being slapped by Yamaguchi-San but it made him realize he was wrong about something. No man should ever mess with another man’s wife. Val apologizes and offers a gift: a special viewing of his latest video entitled Land of the Rising Venis. Val is in bed and stuff is censored. And it’s with Yamaguchi’s wife. Val says sayonara and cuts the camera. He says that once they taste Valbowski, they never come back.

Here’s Vince to address a few things. He says we’ll discuss the tag title situation in a minute and calls out Undertaker. Vince talks about King of the Ring and how Taker fooled him last week. What Vince wants to know though is did Taker have help or was he acting along last week. He demands an answer and Taker refuses. Vince starts to back off and here comes Austin.

Austin tells Vince to get out. As for Taker, he and Austin are on the road to Summerslam. Austin respects Taker for challenging him face to face. However before they get there, they have to go through Fully Loaded. Austin wants to know if Taker will be his partner or another opponent at the PPV. Taker won’t answer him either…..and here’s DX?

HHH says he wants answers too and says that tonight, the Outlaws get their rematch. Somehow that means we’ll find out if Taker and Kane are in cahoots. There are going to be three referees: one on the inside, and Taker and Austin as guest enforcers on the outside. Vince says ok so HHH tells him to suck it.

Brawl For All First Round: Godfather vs. Dan Severn

So this is the reason Severn left the tournament. He easily takes Godfather down over and over but for some reason that no one but the people running this crap gets, they don’t count. The fans HATE this and Severn wins. He bailed on it because he had nothing to prove (true) and it made no sense (double true).

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Kane/Mankind

Austin and Undertaker are referees on the floor. It’s a brawl to start and I don’t think it’s going to change from that very much. Road Dogg and Kane fight in the ring as Gunn hits Foley in the face with the steps. The Outlaws double team every chance they get but it doesn’t really work. We actually get to a tag format with Mankind vs. Roadie. We’re just waiting on the big brawl with the main event guys to start here. Road Dogg has been being beaten down the entire time here.

Billy comes in and there goes the referee. Roadie low blows Kane and hooks a small package. Austin comes in for the count but Kane pulls Austin out. DUN DUN DUN!!! Kane chokeslams Road Dogg but Austin stops Taker’s count. The brawl begins and here’s the Nation and DX. Stunners and chokeslams all around (Shawn said those exact words a second after I thought of them) end the show.

Rating: D. I can barely rate this so I’ll keep it brief: if you’re looking for wrestling here, go read a book instead, because you have no idea what you’re talking about.

Overall Rating: C-. This show is one where your taste will vary depending on what you’re looking for. The wrestling here is nothing of note at all, but it did a lot of the heavy lifting that had to get done to get us to Fully Loaded. Most of the card is set now so we don’t have that to worry about. That being said, the Fully Loaded stuff wasn’t really all that interesting because it’s just a buildup PPV to Summerslam. Not a terrible show tonight, but this would be a great show to read about instead of watching. Make your own jokes about that in the comments.

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Clash of the Champions 15: Knocksville USA
Date: June 12, 1991
Location: Civic Auditorium, Knoxville, Tennessee
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

Let’s get the most important thing out of the way first: that is a very dumb pun for a title. This is a weird show for WCW as Flair was on his way out due to WCW being really stupid. The main event is Flair defending the title against Bobby Eaton in a 2/3 falls match which should be awesome. This is a very old school style show in that there are a lot of matches but most of them are short. Let’s get to it.

Missy Hyatt opens the show but Paul E. Dangerously (Heyman) comes out to wonder why he wasn’t told they were going live.

Young Pistols/Z-Man vs. Freebirds

The Pistols are Steve Armstrong/Tracy Smothers and the Birds are Hayes/Garvin/Badstreet, who is Brad Armstrong, Steve’s real life brother, under a mask. The Freebirds are US Tag Champions here and have two managers: Big Daddy Dink who is more famous as Oliver Humperdink and Diamond Dallas Page who is more famous as Diamond Dallas Page. Garvin vs. Z-Man to start us off.

Bill Alfonso, as in Fonzie from ECW, is the referee. Everything breaks down quickly and the good guys clear the ring. Smothers vs. Hayes now and Smothers takes over. The Birds beat the Pistols at SuperBrawl for the titles so there’s a history there. The ring gets cleared out again and it’s off to Garvin again. Badstreet comes in and Smothers evades all of them for awhile until Badstreet sends him to the floor. Smothers takes a hot shot onto the railing and Z-Man is down too for some reason. Everything breaks down again and the three good guys are thrown out twice. They come back in and hit three stereo sunset flips for the pin.

Rating: C. We’ll ignore that the ending was totally illegal because it was kind of a cool looking thing. The match wasn’t bad and was there to get the crowd into the show which is the whole point. The Pistols never did much of anything and Z-Man either had just lost the TV Title or was about to get it. After that he didn’t do much either. These guys had nothing else to do so throw them in a tag match. That’s old school booking 103.

Enter the Great American Bash Ric Flair Sweepstakes for a chance to meet Ric Flair who was in the WWF by that time! That’s the final WCW PPV I’m going to review also as it’s possibly the worst show ever.

Oz vs. Johnny Rich

Oz is just what he sounds like: a character based on the Wizard of Oz. He comes out of a castle that is so real you can see it shake from the smoke machines. He has the Great Wizard (Kevin Sullivan) with him and Oz himself is more famous as Kevin Nash. You might ask why this character exists. That would be because Ted Turner’s TBS station had acquired the rights to the film Wizard of Oz. Seriously, that’s it. After the big slow entrance, Nash wrestles a faster version of what he usually does, totally missing the point. He finishes with an Eye of the Storm (James Storm’s move) which is called the Emerald City Slam. Just a squash here.

PN News is coming. Oh dear. He’s a guy the size of Mark Henry and a very white rapper.

Dan Spivey vs. Big Josh

Josh is a lumberjack that danced with bear cubs. Are you starting to get why this period was AWFUL for WCW? Spivey is really tall so this is power vs. power. Neither guy is very good and this is almost all punching. Spivery gets a big boot but walks into a suplex. They miscommunicate on something and Josh gets a German for no cover. Here’s Kevin Sullivan still in his Wizard stuff to break a crutch over Josh’s back and a German suplex pins him. This was nothing.

The WCW Top Ten:
1. Lex Luger
2. Great Muta
3. El Gigante
4. Bobby Eaton
5. Nikita Koloff
6. Sting
7. Arn Anderson
8. Barry Windham
9. One Man Gang
10. Steve Austin

All are under Flair of course.

Here’s the Danger Zone which is Dangerously’s talk segment. He brings out Jason Hervey because that little fungus has to be on every WCW show EVER. Heyman won’t let him say anything other than like one word. They talk about the Wonder Years and Dangerously says Hervey is dating Missy Hyatt who Dangerously feuded with forever. Hervey gets mad and gets hit with the phone so Missy comes out for the save.

Terrance Taylor vs. Dustin Rhodes

Rhodes is REALLY young here and not that good. Taylor is the Computerized Man of the 90s and part of the York Foundation. He has Alexandra York with him who is more famous as Terri Runnels plus Mr. Hughes. Rhodes is undefeated which I’m sure has nothing to do with his fat daddy booking things. There’s going to be a new member of the Foundation tonight.

Dustin beats the tar out of him to start but misses a charge in the corner and hits the post. Isn’t that always the way for overly perky faces. Taylor gets a bottom rope suplex of all things back in for two. Gutwrench powerbomb gets the same. Dustin fights back and hits the Flip Flop and Fly to take over. He hits the bulldog but Hughes gets up on the apron. Ricky Morton is here for some reason and the match is thrown out. Morton beats Dustin down and he’s the new member of the Foundation.

Rating: D. This was nothing other than a way for Morton to come in for the turn at the end. Rhodes and the Foundation feuded for a long time as Robert Gibson was recovering from a knee injury. This wasn’t a very good match as Dustin was the boss’ son and that’s about it. No one was interested in it but the turn at the end was a nice touch.

Big Josh makes the save.

Johnny B. Badd is coming. His character is gay but we’re not going to say that because it’s 1991.

We recap Nikita Koloff jumping Sting by mistake at the first SuperBrawl to end the classic tag match. This set up a huge feud which is being blown off here.

Sting vs. Nikita Koloff

I remember these two having a chain match later so maybe this isn’t the blowoff. Sting runs to the ring and is pounded down quickly. No one ever accused Sting of being the brightest guy in the world. Koloff hits a flying tackle and Sting is in big trouble. Out to the floor and Sting goes into the railing. Out of nowhere Sting hits a piledriver but Koloff is up first.

Koloff drops him on his head with a tombstone for two. He kicks at the ribs and blocks a sunset flip. The second attempt works and Sting gets two. Koloff hammers on the ribs again and the extended squash continues. Nikita even throws in an evil laugh because he’s foreign and foreign people are bad. Out to the floor and Sting manages to reverse Koloff into the barricade. Back inside Sting hits a tombstone of his own and makes his comeback. He fires away with that unique style of offense of his but the Splash misses and Koloff loads up the Sickle but Sting ducks and grabs a rollup for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: C. The crowd was WAY into this but the match was pretty dull. Koloff just didn’t care anymore at this point as his wife had passed away a few years before and he wanted out of wrestling to run his gym. He would be gone pretty soon after the Bash and would come back for a summer run in WCW before retiring for good. The crowd carried this a lot and it helped keep the match from being worse than it should have been.

PN News and the chicks from Salt N Peppa are here to rap. This is……well let’s go with William Regal will win a grammy for best rapping before this guy. Johnny B. Badd and Teddy Long appear and talk about how they’re tired of being held down or something. Badd leaves and this is worthless.

Diamond Studd is coming. In a year or so he would imitate Al Pacino from Scarface and call himself Razor Ramon.

Barry Windham/Arn Anderson vs. El Gigante/Brian Pillman

Whoever takes the fall is out of WCW. Brian vs. Arn to get us going in a future battle of the Horsemen. Off to Windham who pounds him down but a spin kick gets two for Pillman. Back to Arn and I guess we’re waiting on the hot tag to Gigante, kind of like when Giant and Sullivan beat up Anderson and Benoit in 96. They can’t beat Gigante so avoid him at all costs. He gets his hand in on Anderson but Windham makes the save.

They do the Andre/Snuka spot for a cross body for two on Windham. Gigante and Anderson go to the floor as Pillman is shoved off the top and Windham kicks him in the face for the pin. Not long enough to rate but Pillman was back in a mask by the PPV which was one of those things where everyone knew who he was but it was a joke or something.

Great American Bash report, which was a tour but there was a PPV for one night of the show.

We get a clip from the ending of Bash 90 with Sting taking the title off Flair. Also stuff from the Steiners beating the Freebirds.

Clip from the WCW/New Japan Supershow where the Steiners won the IWGP Tag Titles.

IWGP Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Hiroshi Hase/Masahiro Chono

Hase vs. Scott to start and Hase hits an enziguri (called a karate kick) to send Steiner to the floor. Steiner takes a beating so it’s off to Rick who is more popular here. Chono comes in and hits the Mafia Kick and then a second one. A third one can’t put Rick down so he hits a Steiner Line instead. Off to Scott and the Steiners hit a move that would have been a cool finisher for another team but for the Steiners it’s just another move. Scott sets for an Outsider’s Edge and Rick drops a top rope elbow at the same time to drive Chono down.

Off to Hase and the American hits a German on the Japanese dude. Rick’s headset is coming off. But how will he know when to breathe without the voice telling him when to inhale? (Why else would he wear that thing?) It’s off to the rookie Chono which is weird to say. He recently had a match with Lou Thesz of all people and hooks in an STF to prove it. Scott and Hase fight on the floor as Rick has been in the hold about 30 seconds. Scott gets to the apron and comes off the top, missing completely to the point where he has to break it up again.

Scott comes back in and runs over Hase so he can hit a butterfly bomb for two. There’s a belly to belly off the top for two and Hase is about dead. Chono saves and a dragon suplex gets two. This is getting a lot better as it goes on. The Japanese try an Irish on the American but Rick pulls Chono out so Scott can hit a Frankensteiner on Hase for the pin. JR’s American spirit pops out as he FREAKS about the Steiners retaining.

Rating: B. Very good match here as the Japanese team was all over the place with cool suplexes and the Steiners were more than capable of hanging with them, which gave us something that you almost never saw in America at this point. Hase would team with Muta to take the titles from the Steiners later in the year.

Post match, the Hardliners, Dick Slater and Dick Murdoch, come out and beat up both teams. During the beatdown they legit injured Scott’s arm. He had to have surgery and wasn’t ever really the same. Keep in mind that this was when WCW basically had the world title on standby for him whenever he was ready to break up the Steiners, so this was a pretty big deal.

Diamond Studd vs. Tommy Rich

Total squash and Rich’s only offense is some basic stuff after getting his knees up on a Vader Bomb. Razor’s Edge ends it. This lasted about 90 seconds.

A kid won a Sting look-a-like contest. He gets to meet Sting. The kid freaks out so this is kind of cool. Koloff jumps him, setting up the rematch at the Bash. That’s where the chain match was. I knew it happened somewhere.

US Title: Great Muta vs. Lex Luger

Luger is champion and the winner gets the title and the world title shot at the Bash. Muta spits out some mist before the match begins. There’s nothing really going on as far as flow to it but it’s big star vs. big star. Luger uses his power stuff but misses an elbow so Muta can stomp away. A gorilla press puts Muta down but Lex misses a charge and takes a big kick. The handspring elbow misses and Muta crashes to the floor. At least that looked cool. Back in Muta loads up the mist but Luger comes up with a counter that somehow no one else ever thought of: he covers his eyes. A powerslam ends this five seconds later.

Rating: D. Match sucked but I’m more impressed by that block. I mean, of all people, LEX LUGER is the clever one??? Even with all these reviews I can still be surprised. Anyway Lex would go on to main event the Bash in a match I can’t wait to get to for how stupid it is. Muta would go back to Japan and would only appear on occasion.

There’s a guy coming to WCW. His name is Steve Austin. Wait….he’d be TV Champion at this point. I’m going to give up trying to figure out WCW. It’ll add years on to my life.

Steve Austin vs. Joey Maggs

Oh ok he had won the title but the episode hadn’t aired yet. Austin’s manager is a chick named Lady Blossom who has a chest that is probably bigger than Trish’s and still works. Austin hits the Stun Gun and we’re done in about 40 seconds.

We continue the Coming Attractions thing which is what they’ve been using to talk about new people all night. This is for Black Blood, which is Billy Jack Haynes as an executioner.

Richard Morton is introduced as the newest member of the York Foundation. He’s in a suit with the rocker hair. He talks about not having to sign autographs anymore. Gibson comes out and is medically cleared now. Morton beats him up and piledrives him. Dustin Rhodes comes out for the save. This might have lasted a minute.

WCW World Title: Bobby Eaton vs. Ric Flair

2/3 falls. Feeling out process to start and Eaton gets in a slap to tick Flair off. A clothesline puts Flair outside and they’re going slow to start but they have enough time for it. Back in Flair gets him in the corner and Eaton isn’t a big enough face to shrug those off. Eaton fires away on him and there’s a Flair Flop. Bobby grabs a shortarm scissors and I’m not sure if that would hurt or not.

There’s a little old lady in the front row that is having a blast. Flair keeps getting a little rush of offense but Eaton counters it every time. Flair sends him into the corner and Eaton’s head might have hit the post. That’s enough for Flair as he goes in with his usual stuff. After working over the arm for a bit they get back up and slug it out with Eaton taking over again. Flair goes up and Ross makes a joke about how that never works.

Flair Flip in the corner and a right hand takes him down. Something like a Boss Man Slam into a backbreaker puts Flair down and a big swinging neckbreaker looks to set up the Alabama Jam. It’s a top rope legdrop and it puts Eaton up 1-0. There’s a thirty second rest period between falls. They slug it out again and Flair can’t keep up with him.

Backslide gets two. Eaton hits another neckbreaker and goes up again but Flair pops up this time and in a smart move, Eaton comes back in instead of going up. Flair is put down again but as Eaton goes up he gets shoved off and hits his knee on the floor, causing a count-out to tie things up.

Back in Eaton hits a superplex but can’t capitalize because of the knee. Eventually the cover gets two and Flair sets for the knee crusher. For absolutely no apparent reason he picks Eaton up for it….and suplexes him instead. He has the knee held back too so it was clearly that move. Anyway Flair goes after the knee and gets the Figure Four after two failed attempts. After a few moments in there, Flair grabs the ropes and Eaton blacks out from the pain for the pin and Flair retains.

Rating: B. It’s a good match and the first fall is by far the best. Eaton was a very good hand for WCW and you could throw him in for a quick TV title shot like this and get a good result like this. Flair working on the knee makes sense and after sitting through a show this long and boring, this was probably a bit high but I don’t care at this point. The show is over and that’s all that matters.

JR and Tony wrap it up.

Overall Rating: D+. The main event is good and the tag match was good, but MAN the rest of this show is dull. These new guys that were being brought in had no real stories to them or anything like that and as a result, no one was all that interested in them. This all led up to the Bash which is absolutely dreadful. Anyway this was another weak show but 91 wasn’t a kind year to WCW. Sting vs. Koloff was a huge feud but this match was nothing worth seeing. Bad show but it has its moments.

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Against All Odds 2012
Date: February 12, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Jeremy Borash

We’re back stateside again and I’m genuinely excited for the main event. With Russo officially out of creative now, things are looking up in TNA and it only took them ten years to get this far. The main event is Roode defending against Ray, Hardy and Storm in a four way which could actually go to any of them. That’s not something I’m used to in multi-man matches as you can almost always write off someone. Let’s get to it.

Hardy arrives to open the show.

We get a video of Hogan talking about how awesome TNA is. It’s followed by a video about the fourway.

Borash is in Tazz’s place. I can’t complain there.

Zema Ion vs. Jesse Sorensen

This is a #1 contenders match for the X-Title. Tazz has had a death in his family apparently. I’m sorry to hear that. Ion walks into a northern lights suplex and gets clotheslined outside. Sorensen ranas him to the floor to start and Ion steals the football that Jesse gave a fan. What a villain! Sorensen misses a baseball slide and Ion puts the football by the steps. Back in and a missile dropkick puts Jesse down.

Ion fires off a moonsault to the floor and his knees hit Sorensen right in the head. That gets a nine count but Ion breaks up the count for no apparent reason. The referee throws up an X and the match is over at 3:36. I’m not going to rate it because they only just got going when the injury occurred and I don’t think it’s fair to grade part of the opening to a match. It was ok though.

There’s a different ring announcer here also.

Christy is in the back with Roode who says that he always get things done and is still the champion. Hardy has had a bunch of chances but has always failed. Roode has beaten Storm time after time. He doesn’t get what Ray’s problem is. Roode can’t wait to laugh at Sting after he wins.

Here’s Robbie E who issued an open challenge earlier today. He has Big Rob with him and talks about the challenge. Anyone that wants a shot (not mentioned if the title is on the line or not) can come get it.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. Shannon Moore

…..REALLY? They have all these people on their roster that can’t get on TV at all and they pick Shannon Moore? Well at least it’s not Eric Young. Shannon armdrags Robbie around and Rob tries to take a walk. Robbie uses his usual basic offense as Moore tries to speed things up. JB talks about going clubbing with Robbie in Topeka, Kansas. Robbie knocks him through the ropes and into the barricade to take over. Back inside we hit the chinlock which is quickly broken.

Shannon keeps trying to go up but Robbie stays on him. Moore makes his comeback and a bulldog gets two. Out to the floor and an Asai Moonsault puts the champion down. Back in and I think Moore spits at Big Rob. Moonsault press misses and a clothesline gets two for the champ. Robbie goes up but gets crotched and a top rope rana gets a near fall. O’Connor Roll gets two but Robbie kicks out, sending Shannon into a right hand from Big Rob. An inverted DDT keeps the title on Robbie at 9:25.

Rating: C. This got a lot better as things sped up, but I could pop in a Best of Robbie E DVD if I ever need help sleeping. He’s so boring on offense and I have no idea why this was given ten minutes. I’d assume it has something to do with the time being short, but if not then they need help. This did improve as it went along though.

We recap the Knockouts Title feud. Tara won a triple threat and that’s about it.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Tara

Tara takes over quickly to start with some snapmares by the hair. Gail gets sent to the apron but she pulls Tara down by the hair to take over. Big boot gets two. Gail hits a missile dropkick and Madison walks out on her. They’ve been having problems lately. Kim works on the knee which has been bothering Tara lately according to JB. There’s an Octopus Hold by Gail but Tara stumbles into the ropes.

Top rope rana puts Tara down but Gail doesn’t cover. That allows Tara to snap off a powerslam and both girls are down. Gail gets up first and tries another top rope rana but Tara backdrops her off and a moonsault off the top hits Gail. The landing hurt Tara’s knee again though. She loads up Widow’s Peak anyway but the knee gives out and Gail hits a knee crusher and Eat Defeat for the pin at approximately 7:00.

Rating: C. This was a decent match with a story being told in the knee injury of Tara. That’s far better than what I’m used to in women’s wrestling anymore so I’ll give this the benefit of the doubt. Also it had an Octopus Hold in it and that makes any match instantly better.

James Storm says he’s ready for Roode and it’ll be a big party when he wins the title.

Recap of the tag title match. Crimson/Morgan beat Magnus/Joe after the latter won the Wild Card tournament. The challengers won a kind of handicap match in England and then got beaten up in England, meaning the only time they’ve had success against the champions is in a two on one situation.

Tag Titles: Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

Morgan and Joe start things off. Morgan shrugs off some shoulders to start and hits a shoulder of his own for two. Off to Crimson and Magnus with the power guy taking over. Back to Morgan and the champs double team a bit. Suplex gets two for Morgan and it’s Red Boy again. Magnus hits a clothesline to bring Joe back in as the challengers take over. A big boot to the shoulder by Magnus sets up a Joe backsplash for two.

There’s a chinlock by Magnus to Crimson as things slow down and we enter into a traditional formula. Crimson misses a right hand and Magnus suplexes him for two. Back to Joe who peppers Crimson in the corner with right hands. A big boot out of desperation put Joe down and there’s the double tag to give us Morgan vs. Magnus. The big man cleans house with knee lifts and a double clothesline.

He charges into a Magnus boot though, but it doesn’t seem to matter as a spinning slam into a Rock Bottom (I think Chris Harris called it the Catatonic) gets two. Magnus and Joe can’t hit their double team finisher but Crimson accidentally spears Morgan. Crimson is sent to the outside and the snapmare and elbow combination gives us new champions at 10:00.

Rating: C+. Pretty good tag match here and I’ll overlook the questionable booking for the sake of giving me something to like on this show. Nothing has been bad but this first hour has come and gone with nothing significantly above average at all. Joe getting a title is a nice sight though.

Bully Ray tells the feeble woman called Christy to go home. He has the number of all three guys and is in the best shape of his career.

X-Division Title: Austin Aries vs. Alex Shelley

Feeling out process to start as things begin quickly. Shelley pounds away with chops and strikes. The fans are split here as Shelley’s Sliced Bread attempt is countered with a shove. A clothesline puts Aries outside and he hides under the ring. He comes out from the other side and shoves Alex to the floor so he can hit the suicide dive. Back in now and the champ is in control.

Aries works on the shoulder of Alex. A kick to the shoulder gets two and we go to a neck crank. Pendulum Elbow misses and Shelley comes back with a clothesline. Sliced Bread is blocked again but Aries is rammed head first into the buckle. Aries heads to the floor to hide under the ring again but as he comes out, Shelley is waiting on him with a suicide dive. Back in Finlay’s Celtic Cross hits for two for the challenger.

Aries takes out the knee and hits the Pendulum Elbow. Not playing to the crowd and wasting time makes your offense more efficient. Who knew? He loads up the Brainbuster but Alex knees his way out of it. They fight to the apron and a Death Valley Driver to the apron nearly kills Shelley. That and a double ax from the apron gets two. 450 misses and Shelley hits Sliced Bread #2 for a VERY close two.

Aries fires off a bunch of knees to the face and hits the Brainbuster for another close two. Shelley fires off some kicks but can’t hit Sliced Bread again. The fans think this is awesome and I can’t really argue with them. Aries counters and hits another Brainbuster which sets up the Last Chancery to finally gets him the win via tap out at 15:11.

Rating: B. This is what the opener should have been a shorter version of. Having this match in the middle of the card is a good idea because the crowd was getting bored and needed something to fire them up. When all else fails, have two small guys go out there and fly everywhere with near falls. It’s tried and true and almost always works.

Hardy says his back is still hurt but he’ll be fine. Creatures, mount up.

We recap AJ vs. Kaz and the Daniels factor in a video that I think was used on Impact.

AJ Styles vs. Kazarian

Kaz is in a shirt which he tries to remove but Daniels says no. AJ controls with a headlock and rips the shirt off himself. They fight over the arm as the fans are all over Daniels. Kaz gets sent to the floor and AJ is in control. Backbreaker puts Kaz down as Styles is working on the back. A flying forearm puts Kaz on the floor for a minute but AJ gets it back inside to avoid Daniels.

A bridging Indian Deathlock with a facelock cranks on Kaz’s back even more. Kaz comes back and slams AJ down so that the spinning springboard legdrop (Wave of the Future maybe?) can get two. Spinwheel kick gets two. Now Kaz works on AJ’s back with a hard whip in and a jumping Russian Legsweep for two. Leg lariat gets the same. Kazarian hooks a double chicken wing on the mat but AJ fights up to his feet.

They slug it out and AJ takes over with a pair of clotheslines and an enziguri. Styles sets for an atomic drop but slams Kaz face first instead, getting two. Styles Clash and Fade to Black are both countered and Kaz hits a dropkick to regain control. AJ grabs a jawbreaker but can’t hit the Clash. Kaz kicks him to the apron and hits a slingshot DDT onto said apron as we hit the floor. Slingshot cutter gets two back in. This is getting good.

AJ is sat up on the top and Kaz hits a running superkick to almost send him to the floor. Kaz goes up for the Flux Capacitor (C4) but AJ knocks him down with a headbutt. Moonsault into the reverse DDT gets a very close two. AJ tries a suplex into a neckbreaker but Kaz reverses into a hard Downward Spiral to put everyone down. They go into a pinfall reversal sequence which gets two for both guys and ends with a Pele to put Kaz down. AJ is sent to the apron and loads up a springboard forearm but instead hits a gorgeous Asai Moonsault to take out Daniels. He tries to springboard at Kaz but jumps into Fade To Black for the pin at 18:37.

Rating: B. Can’t argue with this one either. AJ is always awesome to see when he has time and the ability to be himself. Kaz can do great stuff too, but I could do without Daniels ever being near AJ Styles again. At the end of the day, AJ is going to win the feud with him again, just as he has every time they’ve feuded.

Gunner and Bischoff are in the back and they have a towel for Hogan to throw in to save Garrett.

We recap Garrett vs. Gunner. Gunner was a killer for awhile until Garrett Bischoff beat him with the Nepotism Driver. Garrett got DDTed on the floor but came back with a new trainer: Hulk Hogan. Tonight it’s basically Hogan vs. Eric with Gunner and Garrett as their surrogates.

Gunner vs. Garrett Bischoff

Garrett comes out to Hulk’s music. Garrett controls to start with his usual stuff. He’s in the workout pants still. Gunner takes over for a few moments until Garrett hooks a backslide and front facelock. At this point he has less of a moveset than Andy from Tough Enough. Gunner pulls him into the middle buckle and takes over again.

The beating goes on for several minutes and there’s nothing to say. It’s a guy with experience and some ring skills beating on a guy who knows a total of about 5 moves. This is getting ten minutes on PPV in the second to last match on the card, making it longer than the tag team title match. Gunner works over the neck for the most part.

Eric gets in Garrett’s face so Hogan decks him. Gunner hits probably his fourth neckbreaker but on the next attempt Garrett grabs the rope. Hogan picks up the towel but Garrett says no. And then Gunner DDTs him for the pin at 11:57. Yes, it actually got that much time. Why does this surprise me?

Rating: F. There is no justification for this match to get this much time on a PPV. None. I can’t stand this story because it’s not about Garrett or Gunner. It’s about Hogan, just like it always is. Hogan isn’t putting anyone over, because that would make him look weak and Impact Wrestling is all about him and Bischoff. I know I sound like some whiny fan boy here but this has been old since it started and it’s just going to keep going. How many people can’t get time on a PPV so that Eric’s son can be out there and bore everyone to death?

Sting, in blue and white facepaint, says he’s the enforcer so that everyone is on their best behavior. It’s SHOWTIME!

Video on the main event. The idea is that Roode will do whatever it takes to keep the title and tonight he’s up against huge odds. Everyone talks about how much winning means to them.

TNA World Title: Bobby Roode vs. James Storm vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Bully Ray

Sting is the guest enforcer. This is the match I’ve really wanted to see and I don’t think there’s a wrong answer for a winner here. The match will be judged on how well it goes to get to the ending, which is a very rare situation. There’s a ton of time here too. Even after spending ten minutes on the intros, we have almost half an hour if needed. Ray cuts off Christy and does his own intro. Somehow he’s lost an inch from when he talked about himself earlier in the night. Hardy gets a CRAZY pop. I’m pretty sure this is one fall to a finish.

Roode wants to work with Ray but Ray just glares at him. Yeah it’s one fall. Roode keeps pitching his tag team idea but Ray walks to the floor and folds his arms. Hardy and Storm team up and play ping pong with Roode’s jaw. Sitout front suplex by Hardy sets up a neckbreaker by Storm for no cover. They invite Ray into the ring but he’s cool to chill on the floor. We get word that Sorensen has a neck injury and will undergo further tests.

Storm tries to steal a pin on Hardy but only gets two. Beer Money reunites for a bit for a double suplex on Hardy but there’s no union there. Ray comes in and beats on Hardy as Roode and Storm are on the floor. The fans chant D-Von’s Better at Ray. Superplex gets two on Hardy. Storm rams Roode into the steps but Ray kicks James through the ropes. Ray talks to Roode, saying he wants a spike piledriver. Hardy counters though and Storm is back in.

Hardy and Storm try a double superplex but Ray comes back and adds a powerbomb to make it a Tower of Doom with Roode taking the brunt of it. Ray tries to pin everyone and gets a bunch of twos. Bubba Bomb to Hardy is countered into the Twist to send Ray to the outside. Roode plants Hardy but Ray breaks up a spear attempt for some reason. Ray fires off a corner splash at Jeff but takes the referee out instead.

Bubba Bomb hits Hardy but there’s no referee. Sting tries to wake up Hebner as Ray FREAKS. Ray walks into the Twist but there’s still no referee. Roode spears Hardy down because main event guys have to use a minimum of two spears a year. The referee is back and the Last Call (perfect one) kills Roode. Ray makes the save by pulling the referee out. Storm dives to the floor and hits the poor referee again. Hardy hits the Twist on Roode in the ring and loads up the Swanton but Roode rolls away.

Roode brings the belt in but Sting pulls it away. They get in each others’ faces and Roode shoves him. Roode says hit me but Sting won’t do it. He spits at the Stinger and Sting accidentally hits Hardy with the belt. It’s Summerslam 97 all over again! Roode insists that Sting count but Sting takes forever…and he counts three for the pin at 15:14.

Rating: B-. Good match but it came off as a little underwhelming. The Against All Odds theme was a good idea, but Storm and Ray stayed down forever off moves that weren’t really anything of note. This also illustrates the main problem in the main event: it’s been focused on Sting vs. Roode rather than Roode vs. anyone else. That’s ok at times, but it’s going to have to end in a match between them and hopefully not in another Sting title reign.

Roode laughs a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. There was more good than bad here, but the bad parts were pretty bad. The second half minus Garrett vs. Gunner is a very solid effort and a good sign of what this company is capable of. The first hour looks like a total mess but I have to wonder how much their timing was thrown off by the injury. It’s a good show, but with some pretty decent sized adjustments it could have been very good.

Results
Zema Ion b. Jesse Sorensen via countout
Robbie E b. Shannon Moore – Inverted DDT
Gail Kim b. Tara – Eat Defeat
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Matt Morgan/Crimson – Middle Rope Elbow To Morgan
Austin Aries b. Alex Shelley – Last Chancery
Kazarian b. AJ Styles – Fade To Black
Gunner b. Garrett Bischoff – DDT
Bobby Roode b. Bully Ray, Jeff Hardy and James Storm – Roode pinned Hardy after a belt shot from Sting

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WCW Saturday Night
Date: January 8, 1994
Location: Center State Theater, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jesse Ventura

Back with another week here as we move towards SuperBrawl. The main event tonight is the match announced last week: Sting/Pillman vs. Rude/Austin. In a word, that should be REALLY FREAKING GOOD. This was a good time for WCW before Hogan got there and changed everything they had built up over the last few months. Let’s get to it.

Thunder and Lightning vs. Bob Cook/Bob Starr

Thunder and Lightning is the name of a team from Puerto Rico but I have no idea if they’re the same team. Cook and Thunder start us off. Thunder works over the arm as does Lightning who appears to be the speed of the team. Starr comes in and does about as well as Cook did. Lightning puts Starr over his shoulder and Thunder comes off the top with a forearm to the chest for the pin.

Rating: D. Total squash and pretty boring. Thunder and Lightning are almost identical so I have no idea who is who, nor do I think I should really care. I don’t remember them at all and I think there’s a reason for that. They didn’t do anything special here and their double team finisher was nothing that hasn’t been done a dozen times before.

Sting and Pillman are ready for the main event.

Join the Legion of Doom fan club! Wow that actually existed?

The announcers talk about nothing of note.

Dustin Rhodes vs. Bill Payne

Dustin dominates to start and it’s squashville for the next few minutes. Bulldog ends this quick.

Pretty Wonderful vs. 2 Cold Scorpio/Marcus Bagwell

This is a rematch from Starrcade and was taped the week before this taping, which also happened before Starrcade. Brawl to start and the Pauls stall a lot. Scorpio and Roma start us off. 2 Cold takes him down with clotheslines then rams his face into the buckle, which freaks Roma out. Orndorff and Bagwell come in and the arm work commences. Back to Roma and the beating continues.

This is one of those matches where stuff happens but nothing is really going on if that makes sense. They’re having a match and it’s not bad, but there’s nothing interesting enough to write down or take note of. Pretty Wonderful takes over on Scorpio and their manager the Assassin gets in a few shots. Scorpio tries to speed things up but Orndorff knees him in the ribs to stop that cold. Scorpio finally gets in a knee and Bagwell comes in to clean house. A top rope shoulder puts Orndorff down and everything breaks down. Assassin loads up his mask again like at Starrcade and headbutts Bagwell for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match from a technical standpoint or anything like that but it’s nothing to see at all. Pretty Wonderful was such a dull tag team that they put me to sleep almost every time. Scorpio was at least fun to watch and Bagwell was learning in the ring so he was getting better. The problem was that he never moved past that role for almost three years.

Shockmaster vs. Otis Apollo

I love that jobber’s name. What in the world are you expecting here? Spinebuster ends this in about 90 seconds.

Shockmaster says his best friend is coming here. His name is the Super Shockmaster. We get a promo from Super Shockmaster, which is Shockmaster in a mask calling himself (kind of) Uncle Fred. Thank goodness he went back to WWF by May.

Ice Train vs. Johnny Stevens

Train pounds him down and no sells all of Stevens’ offense. Powerslam ends this quick.

We go to the Starrcade Control Center for a COTC preview.

Harlem Heat vs. Bobby Walker/Jason Johnson

This is when the Heat were still called Kane and Kole. Booker and let’s say Walker start us off. Booker is Kole. Good to know. Walker comes back with a dropkick and armdrag to take over for a bit. Harlem Heat takes over again and use their double team stuff and power advantage to get control. Booker spins up and they use the EXACT same finisher that Thunder and Lightning used earlier tonight.

Rating: D. Boring match and exactly like the opening match which isn’t good in a 90 minute show. Nothing to see here as until their names changed to the traditional ones, there’s not much to see with these guys. This went too long too. I don’t think I remember seeing Johnson at all.

Harlem Heat says the road to the titles goes through them.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Larry Santo

Santo actually gets a fast two off a cross body. A dropkick sends Regal outside for a breather. Back in and Regal takes over with his evil tactics and a cravate. Santo comes back with a shoulder and some punches but runs into a butterfly suplex. A rolling cradle keeps the title on Regal.

Rating: C-. Not a great match or anything but it was nice to see someone get in some offense rather than just getting run over by the big star. Santo never had a chance of course but it was fun to see the crowd react to someone coming closer to taking the title off of Regal, who was just loathed at this point.

Pretty Wonderful says they’ll beat Scorpio and Bagwell as many times as they need to. Assassin talks about the rematch and how they’ll win it. You know, the rematch that happened earlier in the show. Assassin implies a big plan or something.

Rick Rude/Steve Austin vs. Sting/Brian Pillman

This is one of those instances where they’re combining feuds and that’s always awesome. Ok maybe not awesome but it’s a smart idea. The match is joined in progress after a break. It’s Austin and Sting and apparently we only missed about 4 seconds. Off to Pillman quickly and Austin runs. After a quick fight on the floor they head back in. Pillman gets a great head fake on a cross body to set up a middle rope clothesline for two.

Rude comes in and uses his clubbing offense to take over. Crucifix gets two for Pillman but he gets beaten down again. It’s amazing how different Rude was in WCW and how much more believable he was here. Middle rope cross body gets two for Brian. Sting gets the tag and pounds away on the International Champion but gets two as Austin saves a pin. Sting fights out of the corner and goes into a top wristlock battle with Austin.

The two of them trade attempted punches until Sting connects and knocks Austin to the floor. Rude won’t tag in so Austin elbows Sting down on his own. Once Austin gets him down, Rude is happy to come in. That’s an awesome heel tactic and you don’t see it enough. Rude hooks a bearhug for a few moments until Sting rings his ears to escape. He makes the tag to Brian but the referee missed it.

Sting manages to fight both of them off at once after some miscues by the heels. There’s the seen tag to Pillman and Brian dropkicks everyone down. Missile dropkick hits and Parker is in the ring. He kicks Pillman in the back of the head and somehow that’s enough for Austin to pin him without doing anything else.

Rating: B-. Fun tag match but I didn’t like the ending at all. To beat Pillman all you have to do is have a manager kick him once? That’s it? After he was on fire and had Austin pinned? It was probably a time thing but still. Anyway, good match and it continues the story from the previous week. That’s not something you see enough of anymore and it could help to freshen things up a bit.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a boring show for the most part but it did have its moments. The lack of Flair is a strange thing since he’s constantly referred to as world champion. Actually it isn’t so strange as I’d assume it’s so they don’t spoil Starrcade for everyone else. See what happens when I actually think these things through? Anyway, boring show but not exactly bad.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 23, 2009
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
Guest Host: Jesse Ventura

This is another request and it looks like a show with a lot of wrestling on it. Maybe this is a three hour show? Oh ok this is the show with the Breakthrough battle royal, as in the battle royal where the people in it haven’t been world champion in awhile or something like that. Orton is in it so that kind of throws things out the window. Let’s get to it.

I didn’t realize they were using Burn It To The Ground this early.

Yeah it’s a three hour show.

Ventura is introduced but we get Orton instead. This is the night after Survivor Series where Orton’s team lost to Kofi’s team. Orton talks about how Jesse is a radical and someone not afraid to break the rules. He’s not supposed to face Cena for the title anymore but since the guest host can do whatever he wants, Jesse can lift Orton’s ban so he can have his title shot. He requests Jesse’s presence and here’s the Body.

Tonight Jesse’s a wrestler and not the governor. He’s the boss tonight so what he says goes. Orton reminds Jesse of himself when he was younger. Jesse is the revolution, not a part of one party or another. Therefore he’s bringing something new to the WWE tonight. Orton isn’t getting a shot, because it’s the same people getting a shot time after time.

Orton runs through a bunch of the main event guys who he thinks are getting the shot but Jesse says no to each. Tonight there will be a series of matches and they’ll be between people who have never been world champion. The winners will be in a battle royal and the winner is the new #1 contender. Also tonight, we’re getting some firsts, like John Cena vs. CM Punk, as well as DX vs. Hart Dynasty.

Breakthrough Battle Royal Qualifying Match: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

Before the match we get a clip of Kofi saving Piper from being punted and hitting the big dive in MSG. Ziggler is more or less just a comedy character at this point. Kofi knocks him into the corner to start but his jump at Ziggler misses and Dolph takes over. Elbow gets two. He has a lot of the show off character in him already and it’s working for him. There’s a chinlock but Kofi pops up and hits the Boom Drop and Trouble in Paradise to qualify for the battle royal later.

Rating: C-. Too short to mean anything but these two have solid chemistry together. Kofi was a bigger star here though so the ending wasn’t really ever in doubt, especially with Kofi being in the middle of his big feud with Orton. He was probably the favorite in the battle royal going into it.

Miz, the US Champion, is thankful for nothing because he expects greatness. The people should be thankful that they get to watch him.

Breakthrough Battle Royal Qualifying Match: Sheamus vs. Finlay

Sheamus eliminated Finlay from the Survivor Series match last night so there’s a backstory here. Finlay takes it to the floor quickly and knocks him over the table. Sheamus takes over back inside and sends Finlay into the post shoulder first. High Cross ends this quick.

Sheamus destroys Finlay post match.

Teddy Long is thankful for….something but Vickie cuts him off. She’s the consultant and brags about it a lot. Eric Escobar is here to waste some time. Teddy tries to hit Vickie in the face with the mashed potatoes but Escobar intercepts them.

Promo for Jesse’s new show Conspiracy Theories.

Orton comes in to talk to Jesse and says he wants in the battle royal and there’s a conspiracy against him. Jesse thinks there might be something to that because of the boss of the company.

Here’s Punk to talk before his match with Cena. Punk is heel now and will be starting the Straight Edge Society pretty soon after this. Punk says he’s thankful for being straightedge. He wouldn’t want to be any of these people and explains what straightedge means. Punk condemns everyone that commits gluttony on Thanksgiving and talks about how they’re all going to use a crutch afterwards. Through his sober eyes, he can see John Cena.

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Feeling out process to start, resulting in Cena ramming into Punk which hurts Punk’s shoulder. Cena takes over by ramming Punk into buckles but the STF can’t be hooked yet. We take a break and come back with Punk holding a headscissors on the mat. Apparently Punk hit a springboard clothesline to take over during the break. Cena stands up into an electric chair as Punk panics.

Cena can’t really get anything going after that though. Punk whips him into the corner and Cena is in trouble. Neckbreaker gets two. Cena comes back with the shoulders and ProtoBomb. Shuffle looks to set up the FU but Punk flips over the top. Punk tries the GTS but Cena lands on his feet and leg drags Punk into the STF. Punk makes the rope though and things slow down.

High kick puts Cena down for a very long two. This is starting to get good which means that it’s probably over. There’s the running knee in the corner but John counters the bulldog. Top rope Fameasser hits for two. Another AA attempt is countered by a dropkick for two. Punk tries another running knee in the corner but Cena ducks and hits a middle rope AA for the pin.

Rating: B. It’s not quite MITB 2011 but once the commercial was over this got a lot better in a hurry. These two have chemistry together and every time you see them in the ring together you’re going to get a treat. The kickouts at the end were getting very good very quickly and it’s cool to see Cena have to do something bigger than his usual finishers, which is what made this work so well.

Vince comes up to see Jesse in the back and says he won’t accept a challenge for a match. Jesse says that’s not why he’s here. He wants Vince to be hurt mentally. Jesse gets in a great line as he talks about how the state of Minnesota’s budget was over 30 billion dollars a year, so this company is tiny by comparison. Tonight, Vince is going to be an announcer like when he first started. Jesse hands him a tuxedo and says go get ready. We even get the return of the bowtie!

Breakthrough Battle Royal Qualifying Match: Chavo Guerrero/Jack Swagger/Chris Masters vs. Mark Henry/MVP/R-Truth

All three winners advance. Swagger vs. MVP to get us going. MVP takes over quickly and knocks Swagger down with a right hand for two. We get a weird sequence as Chavo tries to come in off the top onto MVP but MVP kind of catches him in a suplex. It looked really awkward. Off to Masters and MVP is in trouble. Truth comes in for some bad punches and it’s off to Henry to clean house. Lie Detector by Truth pins Masters. This was nothing again.

DX is in the back and HHH wants to know why Shawn kicked him last night in the triple threat. Shawn says it was for the championship and he thought HHH would Pedigree him first. HHH says Shawn kicked him three times. Shawn says he was aiming for Cena….and they’re interrupted by a midget lawyer who serves them with papers. Oh dear.

Breakthrough Battle Royal Qualifying Match: Evan Bourne vs. Primo

And never mind as Orton jumps Primo during his entrance and throws him off the stage.

Orton comes to the ring and says he’s taking Primo’s spot. Jesse pops up on the Tron and says he likes Orton’s style so he gets the qualifying spot instead of Primo. He says he always broke rules so it’s ok here. That somehow makes sense.

Breakthrough Battle Royal Qualifying Match: Evan Bourne vs. Randy Orton

Orton sends Bourne into the post for two almost immediately. Bourne comes back with some high flying stuff and the double knees from the top get two. RKO hits about a second later for the pin.

We get some clips of Vince and Jesse on commentary.

Trailer for The Marine 2.

Kelly Kelly/Mickie James/Melina vs. Michelle McCool/Layla/Jillian

It’s Pilgrims vs. Indians with the bad girls being the Pilgrims. Cole and Jerry crack up during the entrances. There’s a special guest timekeeper: The Gobbledy Gooker. I’ve got NOTHING. The Indians come out to Tatanka’s music. Melina vs. Jillian starts us off. Jillian takes over to start and the fans are silent. Laycool walks out and Melina pins Jillian. So freaking stupid but Kelly’s legs looked great.

Jerry goes in to talk to the winners post match and the Gooker jumps Melina. It’s the returning Maryse. Maryse takes forever to get out of the costume. Well she certainly looks great.

D-Generation X vs. Hart Dynasty

Shawn vs. Kidd to start us off. I’d love to see them have a 4 minute match or so. Shawn knocks him down and nips up but it’s off to Smith. The Harts take over on Shawn via the power of Smith. Back to Kidd who hooks a chinlock. Smith loads up a powerslam but Shawn slips off his back and they ram heads. There’s the double tag and HHH comes in to face Kidd. Spinebusters all around but Smith breaks up the Pedigree. Shawn breaks up something from Smith with Chin Music and the Pedigree takes out Kidd for the pin.

Rating: C. Quick match but nothing to see here. It’s nice to see guys like the Harts get to rub elbows with DX and there’s no point to seeing them win here. The idea here was that DX needed to prove they were still together and a cohesive unit, especially given what’s happening after the match.

Post match Jericho comes out and says that DX gets the title shot against Jeri-Show for the titles at TLC. HHH makes fat jokes about Big Show and Shawn says that it’ll be a TLC match. Jericho cuts off the catchphrase and goes on a rant about how DX may be great but they’ve never been tag team champions. You know, because those are so valuable.

Here’s Batista to Rey’s music. Last night Batista turned heel and destroyed Rey. Batista talks about how Rey had a chance to be a tough guy but last night he had to explain things to Rey. He talks about destroying Rey last night with three Batista Bombs and here’s Kane. He wants to know what Batista is going to do about Kane interrupting him. Kane asks Dave to make an example out of him. Batista drops the mic and walks out.

Breakthrough Battle Royal Qualifying Match: Cryme Tyme vs. Legacy

Both winners advance. Cody and JTG get us going but Cody makes a blind tag to give Legacy the advantage. Cody hits a release suplex and a dropkick gets two. Off to Shad who does a bit better with the power stuff. Monty Brown’s Alpha Bomb gets two on Ted. Everything breaks down and Dream Street pins Shad. Too short to grade but it was your run of the mill tag team squash.

Kane vs. Batista on Friday.

The Divas have a pie fight, resulting in Santino taking one in the face. He takes more and more as he keeps bashing women but winds up knocking one into Vickie’s face.

Breakthrough Battle Royal

Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, MVP, Mark Henry, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, Sheamus, Randy Orton

Vince and Jesse are on commentary for this one. Vince comes out to the theme from SNME which is just awesome. It’s great to hear Vince on commentary as he clearly loves what his product is and is a promoter at heart. Legacy stays in one corner and immediately go after Kofi. It’s a big brawl but Sheamus stays in a corner to himself. Orton is on the floor but he went through the ropes.

Things slow down before they ever got going. I don’t think Sheamus has had any contact with anyone yet. He was biding his time though and picks off R-Truth, throwing him out after a clothesline. Legacy works over Kofi in the corner and Orton is back in. Sheamus Brogue Kicks MVP and tosses him to get us down to six. Henry goes after Sheamus but Legacy makes the save for some reason. Sheamus is on the apron but gets back in.

Henry double clotheslines Legacy to the floor but Sheamus drills him in the back and dumps Henry. We’re down to Orton, Kofi and Sheamus. Orton and Kofi hammer away on each other and Sheamus gets knocked down. Jesse goes on a small anti-Chaney rant as Kofi is sent to the floor. He skins the cat though and headscissors Randy out. Sheamus takes Kofi’s head off with a double ax, knocking him to the floor to become #1 contender.

Rating: D. Very boring match but it was a great thing to see them really trying to push someone else as a main event guy. That was something that was badly missing at this point and pushing Sheamus was as good a move as they could have made. It gave them some fresh blood in the main event and if 2009 taught us anything, it was that Raw was dying for fresh main event blood.

Verne Troyer is hosting next week. Oh geez.

We’re having the contract signing for Cena vs. Sheamus right now to close the show. Jesse demands that Cena get out here right now and here’s the champ to his traditional mixed reaction. They sit down and Sheamus says he’s the #1 contender. Cena says that usually, the guy saying that is a future Hall of Famer. Cena wants to know why he should take Sheamus seriously after all he’s done is beat up Lawler and Noble. John says he’s been here for 8 years and gone against the best and is champion today because he’s earned it.

Cena goes into serious mode and says this is all he’s got. He’s gone up against everyone and every single one of them has been taken down. When Sheamus signs that contract, he better be ready to go to war. Both guys sign and Ventura thinks there’s a conspiracy to keep Cena champion. Cena is the perfect looking champion that everyone wants. Jesse didn’t get a title shot because he was a rebel. Cena gets in Jesse’s face, allowing Sheamus to kick his head off. Sheamus rams him into the post and then powerslams him through the table. Jesse says it’s a table match for the title. Sheamus holds up the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It’s not a terrible showbut the three hours weren’t needed. Pushing someone new to the main event is a fine idea but getting there was a problem. Some of these matches could have been clipped and the show would have been fine. It’s not bad but it takes so long to get to the good ending that you’re not going to care once you get there. Jesse is always worth seeing though.

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Clash of the Champions 14: Dixie Dynamite
Date: January 31, 1991
Location: Georgia Mountains Center, Gainsville, Georgia
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Dusty Rhodes

Another one of these and it’s from a pretty bad era for the company. Unlike the one later this year, this show looks atrocious on paper. This is the first one in WCW rather than the NWA so I would expect a few changes. Also Dusty is the booker again so expect the Dusty Finish to abound. The main event is Scott Steiner vs. Ric Flair for the title. I’m not exactly riveted either. Let’s get to it.

After a quick look at the top two matches we get a very 80s opening. You can tell the arena is tiny. I wonder if AJ was there.

National Anthem.

Dusty talks a lot and won’t shut up.

Sting/Lex Luger vs. Doom

Luger is of course US Champion here as he more or less always was. I love that old Sting music. And then again the same can be said of Doom’s music. They’re the tag team champions here in the longest reign in the history of the belts. Ron Simmons and Butch Reed if you weren’t familiar with that. This isn’t announced as a title match but the referee holds up the belts. I guess it is one then.

Reed vs. Sting to start us off. Sting overpowers Reed which is rather impressive. Even in an armbar he shouts to the crowd. Notice what he’s doing there: he doesn’t let the crowd get taken out of it, even in a rest hold. That’s a very nice thing to do. Luger in now as Dusty talks a lot. Ross says in about 5 seconds what it took Dusty 30 to say. We hear about Wrestlewar a little bit where Luger is defending the title.

Simmons vs. Luger now and Ron can’t take him down with shoulders. You can see Simmons wanting to shout his catchphrase. Luger dominates him with power. How often do you see Doom losing to power stuff? Luger walks into a hot shot though and the champions take over. After a break it’s still Doom in control.

Simmons puts his head down though and Luger manages to get a knee/kick in to put Ron down. Simmons gets the tag though to bring in Reed who hits a dropkick of all things to take down Luger. Dusty talks about football to waste even more time. Luger finally takes down Simmons but Reed drills him with a top rope shoulder block to take him right back down. The problem is that it took him right down into his corner. Well isn’t that always the way?

Sting comes in to clean house but Dan Spivey runs out of the crowd to take down Luger. Spivey was Luger’s upcoming opponent at the PPV if I didn’t mention that. Sting doesn’t seem to care and beats up Doom on his own. Reed hits a shoulder to Simmons by mistake and he stumbles into the referee. The referee gets up in time to see Sting get thrown over the top for the CHEAP DQ.

Rating: C. Well it was fun while it lasted but I’ve never been able to stand that over the top rule. This was kind of a backdrop for the Spivey vs. Luger match but that didn’t exactly work. It was ok I guess but the match didn’t really go anywhere and the titles never felt like they were in danger at all.

We unveil the winner of the WCW’s Sexiest Wrestler award. It’s Z-Man. Next.

TV Title: Z-Man vs. Bobby Eaton

Z-Man is champion here. They REALLY crank in chants for Bobby here. Either that or 2000 people can chant louder for Bobby Eaton than they can for Goldberg. Dusty talks about how great both guys are. I can see why Z-Man won the sexiest wrestler thing. Apparently Zenk had already lost the title at a TV Taping so this shouldn’t really mean much at all. This is live mind you so imagine his mindset.

Dusty’s voice gets REALLY old when he’s comfortable which he definitely is here. The problem is that he talks A LOT. Eaton works the arm a bit but goes up and Z-Man hits a sweet dropkick to send him to the floor. And then Dusty talks about how great Brian Pillman is for no apparent reason. He also can’t wait to remind us that he’s a former TV Champion either.

They start slugging it out as Dusty is getting harder and harder to ignore. We hit a test of strength as Ross says Terry Taylor is a tough guy. Oh dear. If this is the show I think it is we get another stupid moment in WCW history coming up very soon. As Dusty talks about getting hit in the head with a stick, Eaton goes up again and gets caught one more time.

Superkick puts Eaton down. Big backdrop and Eaton is in trouble. Who covers someone off a backdrop? Who does he think he is, Moolah? Eaton gets him down and manages to get the top rope knee drop but Z-Man gets to the ropes. Cradle gets two for the champion but he walks into a neckbreaker that gets two for Eaton.

You can see fans leaving for the concession stand. Nice to see a title match has them so enthralled. Z-Man gets a freaking back slide of all things to get the pin to retain. Eaton’s shoulder might have been up though so expect another match before the airing of Arn winning the title.

Rating: C+. This started out slow but it got a lot better once they picked up the pace a bit. Eaton is a guy that is straight up underrated in wrestling as he consistently put on great match after great match. This was fine for what it was, even though it would have been understandable for Z-Man to do next to nothing out there.

The replay shows that it wasn’t even close with Eaton completely kicking out before three. That was pretty bad.

Alexandra York (Terri) says that she has selected the newest member of the York Foundation (computer assisted heel group that more or less sucked) and we’ll see him tonight.

Fabulous Freebirds vs. Allen Iron Eagle/Tommy Rich

I don’t know who Eagle is either. This is Garvin and Hayes. The Birds are heels here but good luck getting a team called the Freebirds booed in Georgia. Dang it now I’m going to have Badstreet USA stuck in my head all day. Hayes and Rich start as we actually get a reference to the world title reign of Rich. Eagle is another Indian character.

The Indian character of course chops a lot. I’m stunned too. Garvin does….something and down goes Eagle. Eagle ducked his head like he was going for a backdrop and Garvin ran up to him to set for a DDT (finisher) but Eagle just fell backwards. Weird as heck  but whatever. We hit the chinlock as this isn’t much at all. Hayes punches him and it sounds great. Eagle forgets to sell and just stands there, making him one of the worst guys I’ve seen in a long time.

Dusty and Jim try desperately to say that Eagle was stunned from the move and it’s just funny as can be. Anyway, Hayes is ticked and beats the tar out of him on the floor with some hard stuff. When Michael Hayes is the ring general, you know you’re in real trouble. Dusty of course talks about being able to go down Badstreet and be ok because he’s tough.

Amazingly enough they manage to screw up something else with Eagle not realizing that Garvin is supposed to be doing a blind charge so Garvin has to throw up a knee to save the spot. Everyone comes in and we get an awkward looking kick to the guy before an awkward looking sunset flip sets up the tag to Rich that isn’t seen. The Birds DDT the heck out of Eagle to end it, thankfully.

Rating: D-. This is a horrible match, but it’s one of those matches where you can laugh at it very hard. The match is bad, don’t get me wrong, but Eagle was so bad that he was hilarious. There were at least 5 botched spots in a seven minute match. Let that sink in for a bit. It really was that bad.

Dusty talks to Paul E. Dangerously about the arm wrestling match tonight with Missy Hyatt and implies that Paul is gay. Dusty of course has more to talk about which is what he’s there for. Dusty’s comments here are flat out sexist but it’s Georgia so he can get away with it I guess. Somehow Heyman gets into I Have A Dream. Moving on.

Joey Maggs vs. Sid Vicious

What do you think is going to happen here? Sid brings his own paramedics with him if that tells you anything. Sid’s hometown of Anywhere He Darn Well Pleases is still great stuff. He’s a Horseman here too. A clothesline and powerbomb end this in maybe a minute. Sid was a bit of a nut but that powerbomb was sweet every time. The paramedics come out and we take a break. Back with Sid beating up Maggs some more on the stretcher. That’s kind of awesome.

Tony talks to Sid who says everyone fears him.

Ricky Morton vs. Terry Taylor

Here’s another one of WCW’s famous goofs. Terry Taylor is introduced as the Computerized Man of the 90s. That would be all fine and good except for one thing: That was his name once he turned heel. The problem is that the heel turn was that the heel turn hadn’t happened yet, completely giving away the ending of the match. Why did Capetta (ring announcer) even have that on his card? What sense does that even begin to make? Early 90s WCW is made fun of a lot, but it’s not really a secret as to why is it?

Taylor wants respect or something, also giving a good indication of the already spoiled heel turn. Robert Gibson is injured here which would eventually lead to Morton joining the York Foundation as well. Technical/feeling out process to start with no one being able to get a distinct advantage. Nice arm drags by Morton. They speed things up a bit but still no one can get an advantage.

We take a break as Taylor hits the floor to break the momentum. Back with Terry holding an armbar. Nice jawbreaker by Morton has Taylor in trouble though as they’re going back and forth rather nicely here. Dusty of course can’t stop talking long enough for Ross to talk about the match but it’s Dusty’s show so who cares? Alexandra York comes down now as we’re not sure who she’s here for. Apparently no one was listening to the intros either.

For no apparent reason we get an inset promo from York, saying that Taylor is indeed the newest member of the York Foundation and that her computer has told her how he’s going to win this. That was the gimmick of the Foundation: the computer would predict the outcome of the match, such as here where it says the time of the fall and what Taylor will win with. It’s as dumb as it sounds.

Morton gets a small package for two as Taylor turns heel and wrestles all evil and such. A bad bulldog gets two for Taylor. It amazes me that they had wireless so early in the 90s. Morton hammers away in the corner and gets a suplex for two. Dropkick puts Taylor down but a second misses and Morton hits the mat rather hard, allowing Taylor to steal the pin.

Rating: C. It’s ok and the early part is good but other than that this was kind of flat. Morton’s singles time was kind of awkward as he was definitely the better half of the team but he wasn’t someone people wanted to see without his partner. This was ok but nothing really all that special.

We get a preview of the Japanese women’s wrestling at WrestleWar. And 8 seconds is all we get of that.

We see Sting getting the Wrestler of the Year award which allegedly was totally rigged or something.

Dusty talks (naturally) about the Gulf War and praises the troops. The war had just ended or was about to end which messed up the Wrestlemania plans Vince had. How dare international politics and wars get in the way of Wrestlemania??? Didn’t Sadaam watch Superstars?

Ranger Ross vs. El Cubano

Ross is a military dude that would be gone soon after this and in prison for robbery, domestic violence, embezzlement and attempted arson by 1996. Somehow an evil masked Communist is looking like a good guy all of a sudden. Cubano is just a masked guy that is apparently Cuban. In an inset interview Ross praises the troops as well.

Apparently if you can see a guy’s face you can read their mind. This is of course according to Dusty. JR says that Ross (the wrestler that is) is a great role model for anyone of any color. Really? The color line was needed there? Cubano misses a top rope splash and Ross sends him to the floor. Ross runs to the ropes and dives over feet first in a plancha type dive. It wasn’t to hit Cubano or anything. That’s just how he left the ring. A rollup ends it maybe 8 seconds later.

Rating: N/A. The odd comments here were more interesting than the match. This went nowhere of course as it was a generic evil guy against Ross who was gone probably before the next PPV. Just a squash.

Ad for WrestleWar and Wargames.

Arn Anderson/Barry Windham vs. Renegade Warriors

The Renegade Warriors are the Youngblood brothers minus Jay who was dead by now. There are massive portraits of the Horsemen behind the ring on the wall. Yeah this isn’t going to be dominance at all. The Warriors jump the Horsemen to start and it’s a big brawl. Sweet merciful crap they look stupid though with their tights being more or less bright plaid.

Windham and one of the Warriors start this off. Arn’s eyes are flat out hilarious. When he gets freaked out you would think he was in a Three Stooges sketch with how freaked out he is. Dusty really likes to remind us that this is in color. Ok Chris is in the singlet. Arn takes him to the mat and works the knee but gets rolled up for two and Arn wants time out.

Off to Barry now and the Horsemen can’t get anything going at all here. Mark beats up Arn a bit. Oh I forgot: the Warriors are Mark and Chris. That might help a bit. Arn gets a spinebuster out of nowhere and the writing is on the wall now. Off to Barry who gets a kind of jumping DDT for two. Dusty rambles about putting your wife in a front facelock and something about a shotgun as Arn and Chris ram heads.

Atomic drop takes care of Chris but they botch Arn’s pump splash out of the corner as he never hits it but he more or less did here since Chris didn’t roll out of the way and barely got a knee up. Mark back in and it’s a big brawl all over again. He gets sent to the floor though and the Horsemen just destroy Chris with a lariat and the superplex for the easy pin.

Rating: D+. Just a long match that wasn’t interesting or anything as we needed seven and a half minutes somehow to show that the Horsemen are awesome over a glorified jobbing tag team. Nothing that terrible but it still wasn’t all that good at all. Too long as it should have been about half this long.

We get a clip of Vader vs. Stan Hansen from Japan which was a freaking war. They’ve having another match at WrestleWar. Hansen, tobacco flowing everywhere, says that it’ll be a real war between real men at the PPV.

Buddy Lee Parker vs. Brian Pillman

Parker is the guy that trained Goldberg and is widely considered to be one of the biggest jerks in the history of wrestling. In short, he was very short and according to Batista had a bad case of Napoleon Syndrome, meaning he hated being small so he tried to use his authority as head of the Power Plant to compensate for it, including telling Batista he had no future in wrestling for some reason. He was a jobber that thought he had meant something in other words.

This is really just a way to talk about WarGames which Pillman is in. He would be the ending of the match as Sid would more or less kill him with a powerbomb and they had to stop the match due to it. Crucifix gets two for Pillman. Even Parker’s basic offense looks bad. Dusty says he has a daughter named Cody. I’ll leave that one alone. Pillman gets a great plancha over the top to take down Parker on the ramp. Top rope cross body ends this squash (notice a theme going on here?) with barely a bit of sweat from Pillman.

Rating: D+. This was a squash but it was a bit longer than the other ones tonight outside of the tag match. Pillman looked great but since he’s in the main event of a PPV shouldn’t we expect that? A squash is fine but what’s the point of having a bunch of them on one show, especially a major one like this? This wasn’t much at all but Pillman’s flying was awesome stuff.

Join the WCW Fan Club!

It’s time to arm wrestle! This was part of the never ending until it ended feud between Paul E. Dangerously and various men as he was feuding with Missy here. Some country DJ is the ring announcer for this. Oh and let’s talk about the troops because that’s just what southern people do. Dangerously being billed as the Psycho Yuppie continues to crack me up.

This is one of the funniest moments in company history as Missy comes out in this big workout jacket but as she is warming up and Paul isn’t looking, Missy takes the jacket off to reveal a low cut top. Heyman’s jaw drops and Hyatt gets the easy win in like two seconds. Funny stuff.

Lawrence Taylor is chilling with the Horsemen at some bar in New Jersey, even though Flair is defending the title tonight in Georgia. This was odd and rather pointless indeed.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Ric Flair

From what I can find, both Flair and Dusty (booking here) came to Scott and flat out said the title is yours, just say the word. Steiner was absolutely awesome at this point and he really was on the verge of shattering the glass ceiling and becoming the top guy in the world. However, he turned them down because it was pretty clear that as soon as his singles push went into effect, Rick was gone. He wouldn’t win the world title for nearly ten years.

Hiro Matsuda is here from NJPW because the first Superbrawl with Fujinami vs. Flair is coming up. El Gigante is here too. Flair won’t shake his hand which resulted in a brief feud between them. Flair has been champion less than three weeks here, getting it back from Sting earlier this month. This has TV time remaining which I’d almost bet anything on that playing into the finish.

Flair shows off his biceps and Steiner is like boy please. Feeling out process to start as you would expect there to be. Steiner counters a top wristlock and Rick gets in Ric’s face as he grabs the ropes. Dusty thinks Scott would like to go into WrestleWar as World Champion. You can’t buy analysis like this people.

Flair hits the floor a bit to buy some time as Scott has been on fire so far. A little more feeling out stuff results in Scott grabbing another armbar. This is some nice technical stuff so far. Flair goes for the knee and Steiner is like oh no you didn’t and clotheslines the tar out of him so Flair hides again. Surprisingly an atomic drop breaks up Steiner’s momentum. I’m surprised his balls can feel anything with all those steroids in him.

Rick shoves Ric’s feet off the ropes when Flair tries to cheat. Is there a reason for those portraits of Anderson and Windham to still be there? Steiner powers out of a cover as we take a break. Back with Steiner throwing the Figure Four on Flair. He’s no Jay Lethal though so he can’t get the tap out. How often do you see a face in control when you come back from a break?

In an awkward looking spot, Flair charges at Steiner but Steiner falls backwards and Flair goes over the ropes. In the awkward part Steiner is supposed to go over also but didn’t have the momentum so after he was stopped he jumped into the air and went over the top. We have ten minutes of TV time left. Flair goes in for the kill on the knee and yells at Rick a lot.

Figure Four goes on and Steiner is in trouble. As we wait for the inevitable reversal, I wonder why the ring ropes were blue, black and yellow. What kind of a weird combination is that? The hold is broken via rope so Flair puts it on again in the middle of the ring. Steiner easily turns is over and we’re back on now.

Flair goes to the floor and Steiner takes him down with a Steiner Line. Down to five minutes remaining. Steiner pounds away in the corner as his leg is ok now. Nick Patrick stops Steiner from punching and Flair a shot in to take over a bit. Ross takes a breath so Dusty talks for a minute or so about how much experience he has in the ring. Under four minutes and Steiner gets a bad sleeper.

Steiner clotheslines Flair over so they alter the rules again so that’s not a DQ with three minutes left. Knee drop by Flair as Steiner is in trouble. Two minutes left and Flair is in the stall mode. Steiner gets a sweet bridge up into a Tiger Bomb but doesn’t cover for no apparent reason.

Ric is on the floor with a minute left. Steiner Line has Flair reeling with 30 seconds left. Flair Flip out of the corner and there’s not enough time. Belly to belly gets two as the bell rings for the time. The whole TV time thing is bogus as we go off the air a minute and a half after TV time expires. Ah ok we needed to show the credits. That explains it. Heaven forbid we don’t know that Ted Turner is responsible for this.

Rating: B. This was good for what it was but with more time it could have been great. Like I said this could have been a title change if Steiner had given it the ok but he decided a tag team was more important. Anyway this was good stuff and it worked rather well considering Steiner didn’t have much big match experience at all. Fun match and interesting for the most part but the ending might as well have been announced at the beginning given how obvious it was.

Overall Rating: D+. Well they tried but at the end of the day there was too much weak stuff here to make this a really good show. The main event is solid but other than that there wasn’t much here at all. Far too many squashes and uninteresting matches for the first hour and a half setting up a good main event doesn’t make a good show though. 91 was really bad for WCW down the line and this was probably the best time for them in the year until the very end of the year. Pretty bad show but the main event is solid. That’s about it.

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USWA Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 2, 1989
Location: Sportatorium, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Marc Lowrance, Frank Duschek

This is the final show in this time period that I have for the moment. After this we have to jump ahead to December unless I get my hands on some more episodes. The main event tonight is a grudge match between P.Y. Chu-Hi and Chris Adams over Chu-Hi and Tojo Yamamoto attacking Adams’ wife. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of last week’s show with Cactus losing to Embry in 9 seconds.

Jarrett and Borne, the tag champions, talk about getting ready mentally to face whomever is challenging them that week.

Billy Joe Travis vs. Dog of War

No idea who Dog of War is. Travis is a smaller guy and Dog is a big monster that looks about as smart as a mailbox. Travis dominates for the most part and we hear that Dog is one of the new recruits to Devastation Inc. WELL OF COURSE HE IS! There isn’t a heel in the company that isn’t! Young and Akbar come out to distract Travis and Dog takes over again. Eric Embry comes out to leads cheers for Travis, as does Pringle. Travis comes back and wins with a Vader Bomb.

Rating: D+. Not much of a match here but the crowd coming alive for Embry was a cool tihng to see. He was on fire at this point and could get anything over. The match was nothing of note but it was only supposed to be a backdrop for the cheering battle between Devastation Inc and Eric, which is fine.

The Punisher, a masked guy who is ripped, says that there’s $100,000 from Akbar to whomever takes out Embry. He says he’ll be coming to take out all of the pretty boys in the USWA. In about a year he would be in the WWF out of a mask and called The Undertaker.

Akbar says Devastation Inc just needs some time to regroup. Young is with him and I keep forgetting to mention this: Young is as much of a Rick Rude ripoff as you can get without getting slapped with a copyright lawsuit. Young basicaly threatens all of the faces in the company and says Devastation will be coming for them.

Jerry Lawler says the caliber of talent has gone way downhill since the USWA has replaced WCCW. Namely Eric Embry, who isn’t championship material.

P.Y. Chu-Hi vs. Chris Adams

The Japanese guys do their ceremonial stuff including the salt. Adams goes straight at him and drills the referee about 10 seconds in. He gets the kendo stick and everyone gets blasted. Gary Young runs in for the save. Adams gets beaten down 3-1 until Borne and Embry make the save.

Percy Pringle says Lawler has defended everywhere except in Dallas. For some reason he’s shunning Eric Embry so Eric will come looking for Lawler.

We get a video of coming attractions, as in people coming to the USWA. They had an open door policy, meaning people would come in for however long they wanted and then leave. Some of the people are the Rock N Roll Express, Master of Pain (Undertaker), Ronnie P. Gossett IV (fat guy), Bill Dundee, The Wildside (tag team), Dustin Rhodes (20 at this point), Black Bart/Dirty White Boy (WHY DOES THIS GUY FOLLOW ME THIS MUCH???), Dutch Mantel and The Blackbirds (tag team).

Akbar says Devastation Inc is on top of the company.

Kerry Von Eric vs. Taurus Bulba

Nothing really going on to start. They circle each other some more until Kerry gets in the first offense, punching Bulba down. They go to the floor and apparently this is falls count anywhere. Bulba hits his signature headbutt for two because the referee wasn’t in position. They brawl out the door but come back in before a camera goes to follow them. Back in the ring and Bulba takes over with chops and headbutts.

We take a break and come back with them on the floor and Kerry hitting him with a chair. Von Erich loads up the Claw but Bulba pokes him in the eye. Bulba headbutts the post by mistake but he doesn’t go down. Another Claw attempt is countered and Bulba grabs one of his own. Kerry goes down but the fans chant him back up. Bulba takes him right back down….AND GETS THE PIN WITH THE CLAW ON KERRY VON ERICH!!! IN DALLAS!!!

Rating: B. This was a pretty awesome brawl and my eyes actually popped open at the ending. This just did not happen in the Sportatorium which is a big part of why this was so shocking. The people were stunned as were the announcers and myself. The ending was pretty much clean on top of that, which makes this even better. Great brawl too.

Kerry stops struggling until some friends make the save. He has to be taped up. Kerry is taken out on a stretcher. After a break we see him being taken to the back again, as in they replay it including the commentary.

Overall Rating: B-. I can’t complain much about this show as it worked a lot better than the previous two. The lack of the main event that was announced was annoying but the Von Erich stuff was really interesting and I was legitimately surprised. That doesn’t happen often so it’s a nice thing to see. Best show so far but unfortunately I have to jump to December now.

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It’s that time again.This is an interesting show on paper.  I’m genuinely stumped as to who is winning the world title, but I think I’ll take Roode to retain.  I know the fun pick is Bully Ray, but even with his awesome heel run, it’s a dagger to the common fans.  Storm I just don’t see getting it back yet and I think they’ll save Hardy to win it at Lockdown.

Give me AJ over Kaz but not without shenanigans.

New tag/X Champs.

Gunner vs. Garrett…..someone check on me during that one to make sure I didn’t hang myself.

Picks/thoughts?

I’ve been getting a ton of requests for shows from this series lately so just to clarify: once I get done with the No Mercy reviews, I’ll be doing the Backlash reviews in order as I always do. Those are the only two series I have left in WWE and I’ll be doing Backlash 2006 as the final WWE PPV review.