EOTY Awards – News Story of the Year

This one should be a bit arguable.I’m going to go with the downward spirals of the Hardy Boys.  Jeff went from being a heel (seriously, WHO THOUGHT THAT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA???) to Victory Road and Matt made him look like a pillar of stability by comparison.  These two were at one point considered the future and now they’re running jokes.  And Jeff will be world champion by Mania.

 

Your picks/thoughts?




Coming Soon: Table of Contents

Sometime soon, hopefully before the end of the year, I’ll be trying to consolidate a list of links to all shows I’ve done and putting them on the top of the main page. I’ll keep it updated with each review I post for easier navigation for both you all and myself.

KB




Monday Night Raw – December 17, 2011 – Nuns, Groceries and Bingo

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 17, 2001
Location: CajunDome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a request from someone. Either way it’s a Raw from 2001 post Alliance which makes it automatically better than the previous show. Tonight the main event is RVD vs. Jericho for the Undisputed Title. Other than that I don’t know much about this show at all and I’m not sure why it was requested that this was reviewed. It’s post Armageddon so Jericho is world champion.  Let’s get to it.

Matt Hardy is in WWF New York drinking. Make your own jokes.

Hardcore Title: Undertaker vs. Jeff Hardy

Taker is champion and has short hair here. He’s recently heel but is still Rollin. He’s booed out of the building….I think. Taker decks him before the bell rings and demands respect. Jeff hammers away and manages to dropkick Taker to the floor. A big dive to the floor hits railing though and Taker takes over again. Matt and Lita have broken up for some reason. This is total dominance by Taker. There’s the Last Ride and it gets a face pop. Lita goes up and Taker just glares at her. That gets rid of her and Jeff is done quick.

Rating: D. No idea what was up with the squashification here. I know Taker was far bigger than Jeff as Jeff was still a Hardy Boy here but maybe I’m just looking at it with almost 2012 eyes. Not much here but it made Taker look awesome….which goes against the idea of his heel turn but this was a bad year as far as common sense for WWF.

Taker carries Jeff to the back for no apparent reason. Oh wait he stops on the stage and lays Jeff down, then powerbombs him off the stage. Here’s one for Lita as well but she kicks him low. It doesn’t work but nice try. She gets tossed as well and Matt panics in WWF New York. Gee maybe you should have been here. Matt would get hurt on Smackdown and I don’t think they were back until the Rumble.

Matt calls to the arena and tries to find out about Lita.

Here’s Vince to talk about Austin. They don’t like each other anymore and the WHAT chants have recently debuted. We get a clip from Smackdown where Vince started a small fire and one of the fireman was Austin who beat up Booker T and Vince. This led to the AWESOME grocery store fight which was one of the first things I looked for upon discovering the wonders of Youtube. I may need to go back to that for pure nostalgia.

He demands Austin come out here and here’s Austin with the WHAT shirt. Vince yells at the fans that he hates the WHAT stuff and yeah heels are idiots in wrestling. Vince wants an apology and Austin is incensed. He says he took Booker on a shopping spree and lists off things that he gave Booker, saying it was a favor. He was calm, cool and collected. Austin lists off things he ate today and the chants just get louder and louder. He also had 9 beers and a Bloody Mary. This was one of Austin’s lasts gasps of charisma and it still works. Austin untucks his shirt but Booker saves Vince.

He pops up on the Tron and is next to Austin’s truck. Booker already took it for a joy ride and talks about the beating in the grocery store. The truck gets destroyed with some metal object and Austin goes after him.

During the break, Booker bailed as Austin got to the back. Austin chased after him in the beaten up truck.

Tag Titles: Albert/Scott 2 Hotty vs. Dudley Boys

Two guesses as to who has the titles here. Good night I could look at Dudleyville Stacy all day. D-Von vs. Scotty gets us going. Bubba distracts him and the champions take over. Double flapjack looks to kill Scotty and this is totally one sided. Off to Bubba who takes a superkick and it’s off to Albert. He’s the Hip Hop Hippo here and after a dance it’s a Giant Swing to D-Von. Missile dropkick from Scotty takes down Bubba and the Worm gets two. Stacy takes her boot off but Albert kisses her down. 3D ends Scotty.

Rating: D. Total squash here as I don’t think even Scotty’s grandmother thought he had a chance here. Any match with Stacy in that outfit can be called a failure but other than that there was nothing here at all. They had nothing else to do with the titles at this point as the great three way feud was long since done by this point.

Booker is on the phone with Austin and is hiding in a church. Vince: “Say what?” How nice of Vince to leave the speakerphone on for us. Booker is about to play Bingo. I remember this show.

Russ Haas, Charlie’s brother and a WWF developmental guy, passed away.

European Title: Christian vs. Tazz

Christian chokes Tazz with Tazz’s towel and punches in the corner. Tazz hooks two suplexes but the Tazmission is countered into the Unprettier for the quick pin. There was a low blow in there somewhere. Total squash. Tazz would get a quick tag title run in January and then retired in like April. He hooks a Tazmission after the match but no one cares.

Gregory Helms talks to Ric Flair about Tazz but Lance Storm pops up to beg for a job. Flair freaks out on him like only Ric Flair can do. If Storm wins tonight Flair will ruin Storm’s life. His match is against the Rock. Flair was a boss at this point.

Vote for the match of the year that will air on New Year’s Eve!

RVD is getting ready and Vince tries to suck up to him and get RVD to work for him if he wins the title. RVD isn’t pleased with the idea but never stops smiling. Vince wants Jericho to win now. He’ll be doing commentary.

Booker plays Bingo. He doesn’t win so he starts a small ruckus. Then he switches cards with some old woman in an attempt to cheat. Now Austin is calling the numbers and Booker runs. Booker’s card would have won.

After a break Booker is still in the church and this is like something out of a WWE Pictures movie. He hides in a pew then behind the pulpit. You know, if he wouldn’t pop his head out every 8 seconds, the hiding spaces might work. Now he pretends to be a statue. None of this is funny in case you’re wondering. Booker hides in a closet and oh man I think I know where this is going.

The Rock vs. Lance Storm

If Storm wins, he gets his job back. They fight over a hammerlock and then Rock kills him with a clothesline. Out to the floor and Rock jumps in on commentary. He says Lance is trying to get his job back but reads a paper which is a list of possible jobs. The best one though is to go back to getting beaten all over Cajun Country. See how that works? He did something out of the norm which happened to be funny and it worked.

Back in, Storm accidentally kicks the referee. Sharpshooter by Rock gets a tap but here’s Test to break it up. A big boot gets two for Storm. Rock hits the spinebuster but goes after Test and gets counted out. Well they had to do something with Storm and it’s not like they were going to have him pin Rock.

Rating: D. This was nothing and is there really any point in it being Rock in the first place? I mean, there was NO ONE but Rock that could do this? I mean….HE’S THE ROCK. They couldn’t have it be like a handicap against the APA or something stupid like that? Kane maybe? I don’t get it.

Rock gets in Rock Bottom position post match but doesn’t attack. Instead he shakes his hand, and THEN Rock Bottoms him. Kind of a jerk no? Rock was the one that lost his focus and got beat.

Back at the church and a woman walks into the same closet. And yes it’s a confessional. The girl admits she’s cheated on her husband with her husband’s brother and his best friend. Booker wants details and apparently there was alcohol and a video camera involved. She’s instructed to do 18 Hail Marys and send him the tape. This is going to end badly isn’t it?

Here’s Jericho to talk. He talks about beating Rock and Austin in one night. To be fair, that was less than three weeks before this so it was brand new. There’s no reason for RVD to get a title shot tonight says he. RVD cheated to beat him on Thursday and he has footage to prove it. Van Dam used a chair so he shouldn’t get a title shot. He demands Flair reverse the decision from Thursday and cancel the match tonight.

Cue Flair who says no. Jericho brought the chair into the ring and RVD used it. All Flair saw was Van Dam get the pin so he’s #1 contender. Jericho gets in Flair’s face and says Flair wishes he was someone else for once. Flair doesn’t deserve to be in the same ring with him, WOO! He accuses Flair of having a midlife crisis. Flair: “I HAD THAT TEN YEARS AGO!” Somehow this turns into Flair refereeing the main event tonight. See, something like this is perfect for Flair: being the boss, talking about how great things can be, and maybe refereeing a match or something like that. He’d be perfect for something like that today.

Edge/Rikishi vs. Kurt Angle/Test

Edge and Angle are on the verge of a mega feud and Edge is on the verge of a mega push. He’s IC Champion here. This was supposed to be Regal instead of Test but Edge hurt him. Angle had a really bad rock remix of his song here. It sounds like a half breed between his music and the late 90s Big Bossman song. Angle vs. Rikishi starts us off. Kurt avoids a quick Stinkface and spins Rikishi inside out with a clothesline. Edge comes in with a top rope clothesline and everything breaks down. Spear to Test but the Angle Slam pins Edge. This was nothing.

Rikishi starts to clean house but gets beaten down. Rock makes the save and Test gets a Stinkface.

HHH returns January 7. The song playing over his video: Beautiful Day by U2. That’s an…odd choice.

Test is in the back and Cole annoys him so Canada gets its revenge on Cole. By that I mean a really awkward shove.

Big Show/Tajiri vs. Billy/Chuck

Torrie is with Tajiri here and is Cruiserweight Champion. Billy and Chuck aren’t gay yet. Chuck pounds on Tajiri to start but Tajiri gets a BIG kick in the corner for two. Jerry: “Did you tell Torrie I had a mirror over my bed?” JR: “HOW WOULD I KNOW YOU HAVE A MIRROR OVER YOUR BED???” Well I thought it was funny. LAUGH MONKEYS! Billy beats on Tajiri a bit and the heels double team. Tajiri hits a big kick and it’s off to Show. Tarantula to Billy but Show kind of gets kicked by Chuck. The handspring elbow hits Torrie and Billy hits a flapjack for the pin. This was again, nothing.

A guy confesses to Booker that he ate too much dessert. Booker isn’t pleased and throws him out. Here’s Austin to confess and Booker runs some more.

After a break, Booker and Austin run in front of some nuns. They need a ride to an orphanage and Booker uses the chance to escape. Austin runs into a priest who wants to hear Austin’s confession. Ok then. And yes, that’s it.

Flair offers to teach Van Dam the Figure Four.

WWF World Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Jericho

Vince does Jericho’s intro. Van Dam isn’t One of a Kind yet. Jericho grabs the arm to start. Van Dam sends him to the floor and hits a dive as America takes over on Canada. The Canadian hits a German on the American for two. Jericho hooks a chinlock as Vince is in full heel mode here. Lionsault misses but a quick clothesline gets two for the champion. Van Dam gets a rolling sunset flip out of the corner for what might have been a faster two.

Vince praises Jericho the whole match and talks about how awesome he is. This has been almost all Jericho, and to be fair he’s world champion so it probably should be. A spin kick takes Chris down and a flip attack off the top gets two. A standing rana is countered into the Walls which of course isn’t the finish. Flair and Jericho get in a fight and Rolling Thunder sets up the Five Star but Vince pulls Flair out and a it’s thrown out I guess.

Rating: C. Just an ok match here because the focus was on Flair and Vince. The ending was stupid but this was a pretty stupid Raw overall. The ending had the fans buying something might be up but it was pretty clear what Vince was going to do. Not much here but I’ve seen far worse.

The good guys put the bad guys in Figure Fours to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I wasn’t all that pleased with this one. Van Dam’s push went nowhere other than right back into the midcard while Vince vs. Flair resulted in the return of the NWO for no apparent reason. Not much here and the Booker vs. Austin stuff wasn’t funny, which I’m sure they didn’t care about so what difference does it make? Not a very good show.

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Spring Stampede 1999 – Such A Breath Of Air And A Great Tag Match

Spring Stampede 1999
Date: April 11, 1999
Location: Tacoma Dome, Tacoma, Washington
Attendance: 17,690
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

This is the final part of the WCW stretch thank goodness. These past two shows have just killed me as they’ve been completely awful. This show HAS to be better than those. I mean the law of averages has to catch up with WCW eventually right? The main event tonight is a fatal fourway for the title with Hogan vs. Nash for Flair’s title. Oh and Goldberg vs. Nash. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is just a clip reel of the four guys in the main event.

The set is an old style one almost like Nitro but with a Spring Stampede logo and set to it. I like it.

Blitzkrieg vs. Juventud Guerrera

I’ve heard a ton of great things about Blitzkrieg but I don’t remember him that well. Apparently he’s one of the more insane high fliers ever. I’ve heard his music before somewhere but I can’t place it. The winner faces the Cruiserweight Champion tomorrow night. They shake hands pre match and the crowd is hot. They go to the mat quickly and Juvy might have pulled his mask a bit. Well if you wear one it might get pulled you lunkhead.

They speed things up and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Blitzkrieg. Blitzkrieg pounds away in the corner but Juvy comes back with a springboard dropkick to take over. Blitzkrieg goes outside so Juvy hits a great dive to the floor. Brainbuster gets two. Here’s a surfboard which always amazes me. Blitzkrieg speeds things up and hits a spin kick. A dropkick puts Juvy outside and Blitzkrieg sets for a dive but Juvy sees it coming and dropkicks him out of the air.

Back in and Juvy is sent out again. HUGE spinning moonsault by Blitzkrieg kills him and they go back in. Things speed up and they bust out some slick counters. A move we would call Yang Time misses for Blitzkrieg and the Juvy Driver is countered as well. Blitzkrieg tries what I guess you would call a spinning hurricanrana into a victory roll driver out of the corner for two. They go up again and Juvy counters the same move into a Juvy Driver off the middle rope for the pin.

Rating: B. Again, the old school WCW formula works: a big fast paced match to open the show with two guys just going insane out there. Blitzkrieg would only be around a few months and never really had a big match with Mysterio that I remember, which is a shame because it would have been awesome. Good stuff and better than most of the usual stuff from this division.

After a quick recap of Hak vs. Bigelow, here’s your generic hardcore match for the night.

Hak vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Hak comes out carrying a table and wrapped in barbed wire. He is, not the table. The brawl begins on the floor and they go to the wagon. Hak has hidden a table under there. Well of course he has. He hits a HUGE swanton off the wagon through the table. Chastity, Hak’s chick, gets the gimmicks (Tony’s term for weapons) out and Bigelow shrugs the dive off.

Back to ringside and they hit each other with various metal objects. Tony flat out says that trashcans don’t hurt that badly. What’s with him tonight? Bigelow whacks Hak with said painless can then a kendo stick shot. There’s a plastic salad bowl to the head. They botch what I think was a suplex and Bigelow falls on Hak’s knees. Out to the floor and here comes a ladder.

Hak dropkicks it into Bigelow and then hits another Swanton onto the ladder onto Bigelow. Now he busts out a piece of a barricade and the table falls to the floor. The ladder is up in the ring and the table is like a bridge between the ring and barricade. Hak climbs up for no apparent reason and goes crashing down through it. Back in the ring there’s a barricade in one corner and a ladder in the other.

Hak gets crotched on the barricade which Bigelow picks up. He stands there with it forever because Chastity is late with the extinguisher. The distraction lets the White Russian Leg Sweep put Bam Bam down. And then he hits what’s supposed to be the Greetings From Asbury Park (single shoulder sitout Tombstone) off the middle rope through the table but it was more like a powerslam. Either way it ends things.

Rating: D+. Not bad but this was just another hardcore match in WCW. Neither guy was worth anything other than this but it filled in a little over ten minutes. The ending bump was pretty solid but the match was nothing memorable at all, which is the major problem with this division as a whole. In WWF, they were bad but they were funny. These just aren’t that good.

Mikey Whipwreck vs. Scotty Riggs

Riggs is a narcissist style character here. I have no idea why this match is happening but that’s WCW for you. Riggs dances around like Rick Rude and tries to show Mikey up. There’s been practically no contact in the first minute. Mikey slaps him in the face and it’s the Cody Rhodes idea where he’s freaked because his face was touched. Riggs is knocked to the floor and this is nothing to see.

Mikey puts his throat over the bottom rope and hits a slingshot legdrop. A rana off the apron drives the top of Riggs’ head into the floor. Get this over with already. Another attempt at the legdrop misses and Mikey goes into the railing. Dropkick takes him down and I put on a Jimmy Stewart movie from the 30s. A quick chinlock gets a big BORING chant. Mikey hits a middle rope dropkick for two. And then Riggs hits a forearm for the pin.

Rating: F. If Scotty Riggs getting a featured match on PPV in 1999 wasn’t enough, the match was terribly boring. The problem here was that no one had any reason to care about these guys and Riggs was in a nothing gimmick that we had seen a million times before. I mean how many times have you seen a character that is obsessed with his looks and talks about how pretty he is?

We recap Disco Inferno vs. Konnan. Konnan had a music video which Disco made a parody of. There’s your match.

Konnan vs. Disco Inferno

Oh and Disco is in the Wolfpack here….kind of. Konnan makes what I presume are gay jokes about Disco’s looks to start. Disco imitates Konnan and hits his rolling lariat. He goes up but Konnan shakes his crotch at him so Disco hops down. Ok then. Konnan takes over and hits his seated dropkick. Konnan has a big bandage on his head which I missed before. They’re both in camo pants. K-Dawg climbs the corner with a running armdrag. Not bad.

Off to the chinlock section of the match. Can we vote to get that removed? It happens in almost every match and it’s really dull. Disco hits a middle rope elbow for two. Konnan gets sent to the floor and this has been almost all Disco. I think he finally realizes he’s fighting Disco Inferno and comes back with the 187 (fisherman’s DDT) for two. Disco gets the same off a neckbreaker. After a bunch of clotheslines miss, Konnan hits Disco’s own finisher the Last Dance (Stunner) for the pin.

Rating: C-. Oddly enough this was better because of Disco. Had he had a workable gimmick and maybe a name change, he could have been a decent midcard guy. The problem is he’s most famous for the idiotic character and he never could escape it. Still though, he wasn’t half bad here.

We recap Kidman vs. Mysterio for the Cruiserweight Title. Rey took the title from Kidman, and they’re also tag team champions. This is the rematch.

Cruiserweight Title: Billy Kidman vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Winner gets Juvy tomorrow night. They do some nice flips to start without much damage being done. Rey gets a headscissors and has a small advantage. Kidman hits one of his own and the first two minutes or so are a stalemate. Rey gets backdropped to the floor and there’s a dive which gets very little reaction. Kidman takes over and Rey goes into the barricade. That’s a surprising amount of violence from two face champions that are smaller guys.

Now Rey sends him back to the floor. Kidman shows off some impressive strength and catches the Asai Moonsault attempt. Rey goes into the steps and both guys are getting mad. Lionsault gets two for the champ. Another rana attempt is countered into a running powerbomb. The crowd is pretty silent for this and to their credit it’s a pretty slow match so far. BK Bomb gets two. They go to the floor and Kidman hits a Shooting Star off the apron.

Back in the World’s Strongest Slam puts Rey down but Kidman jumps into a dropkick. The fans sound like they’re at a golf tournament that doesn’t have Tiger Woods in it. They both go to the top and Rey hits a top rope bulldog for two. I really don’t understand this crowd. The match isn’t a classic or anything but they’re hitting some BIG spots in this. Kidman hits the chinlock and the fans don’t react at all.

After a quick trip to the floor, Rey takes over again. He dives into a clothesline though which is a nice little nod to earlier in the match. The crowd again does not care. Heenan talks about Rey’s fatigue pants and how there are a bunch of pockets in them. “Wouldn’t it be fun to load those up with illegal objects?” Tony and Mike of course use that to talk about Hak and Bigelow, because they don’t get the idea of a heel commentator. Bobby might as well be running with an anchor.

Rey gets a facejam for two. He looks like he’s about to cry. Mysterio gets taken down into position for a Shooting Star but he’s playing possum. Kidman counters his whatever into a sunset bomb off the top for two. AND THE CROWD STILL DOESN’T CARE. Rey counters a wheelbarrow suplex off the top into a sitout bulldog for two. That’s what he won the title with in the first place. A top rope Fameasser and standing moonsault get two for Rey. Kidman blocks a powerbomb and tries another shooting star but Rey breaks it up again. There’s a top rope rana into a rollup for the pin for Rey.

Rating: B-. I really want to understand the issues with the crowd here. This wasn’t a classic or anything but it was really a pretty good match. The near falls until the end were really hot and the crowd just sat there. I don’t know if they were burned out by a weak stretch of matches or what but I was really confused by it.

We recap Raven/Saturn vs. Malenko/Benoit. The Horsemen were tag champs and were fighting Raven 2-1 for some reason. Saturn came in to help and got a submission but it didn’t count for some reason. Raven and Saturn cost the Horsemen the titles so this is a grudge match. See how easy it can be to set up a non-title feud?

Raven/Perry Saturn vs. Dean Malenko/Chris Benoit

Anderson is with the Horsemen here. Raven and Saturn bring out a table. Oh and if you don’t believe WCW went on talent raids in ECW, I present you with this match. Saturn is in a leather skirt because of some big thing with Jericho. The fans are all over the Horsemen already. Dean stalls to start and MAN the fans are on him. Oh ok he’s stalling on the apron so much because Benoit is starting.

The Canadian sends him to the floor and Saturn sends the Horsemen into each other. Off to Raven as Benoit gets beaten down. Benoit dropkicks Raven to the floor so Anderson/Malenko can double team him. Something like a double spinebuster puts Raven down and they work on his legs/hamstrings. The crowd pops more for a Raven kickout than anything in the previous match.

Lil Naitch is refereeing so he just happens to miss Raven’s small package on Benoit. Clothesline gets two for Benoit and Robinson seems to be counting faster than usual. He stops Saturn from coming in and gets great heat. Saturn comes in and cleans house but Malenko takes him down with a right hand. A modified Doomsday Device by the non-Horsemen gets two as Benoit grabs Rolling Germans on Raven.

Malenko hooks the Cloverleaf on Saturn but he makes the rope. Great drama so far in this. Death Valley Driver hits Malenko but Benoit comes in PERFECTLY to break it up with a Swan Dive which also gets two for Malenko. Things settle down again and Benoit works on Saturn’s leg. Malenko comes in with a sleeper and body scissors. Raven breaks it up and things break down a little again.

After a northern lights suplex we go to the floor where Dean kicks Saturn in the ribs a few times. Back inside and he comes in legally for a change. Chinlock goes on now but I can live with this one as they’re probably getting tired. Raven finally comes in and is on fire. He had a tendency to not be in the ring that often but when he was he was incredibly energetic.

Someone throws in a chair and Raven hits the drop toehold onto it with Benoit’s head going in. Anderson pulls Dean off a table on the floor so Saturn goes through instead. Even Flow takes Dean down but Anderson interferes, allowing the chair to be put on Raven’s head so Benoit can hit a Swan Dive to the chair to Raven’s head and Malenko gets the pin. Great match.

Rating: B+. That’s probably high but I was really getting into this one. The ending is good too as the Horsemen cheat to win and the heat on them was great. Excellent match as they gave four very talented guys time and a story and you got a very good match out of it. If WCW could get that that was the idea of exciting wrestling, they might still be in business today.

We recap the US Title match. Hall had been US Champion but got legit hurt so we had to have a new champion. A tournament started and after some Jericho shenanigans, he didn’t make the finals. Instead it’ll be Booker, the TV Champion, against Scott Steiner. Stevie Ray might be in his brother’s corner here but it’s not entirely clear.

US Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

Scott gets in an argument with a fan as the fan’s girlfriend keeps rubbing his chest. Funnier than it sounds. This goes on for a good while as Steiner keeps yelling at fans. Steiner finally gets in the ring and then goes to the ropes to avoid fighting. Back to the floor and now Steiner jumps into the crowd. Steiner finally comes in and taker Booker down with ease.

Booker speeds things up and hits AJ Styles’ drop down into a dropkick to send Scott to the floor. Steiner pounds him down some more and this is looking like it’s not going to be particularly interesting. A clothesline off the apron puts Scott down again as this has been back and forth. Steiner tastes the steel but manages to crotch Booker out of the corner. Out to the floor for some chair shots and we head back inside.

Now we get the push-ups. He shoves the referee and this is going nowhere. There’s a Steroids chant. Belly to belly gets two. Now Steiner just openly chokes the referee and kicks Booker low which isn’t a DQ due to the referee being scared. Steiner has to stop to pose because we need a break or something. Off to a bearhug which is probably the last thing this match needs.

Booker starts to escape but gets caught in a belly to belly drop on the head. It was supposed to be a suplex but it just wasn’t. A DDT puts Scott down and HE ACTUALLY SELLS IT!!! Take a lesson Rick. Booker comes back with some strikes and he goes up top. And there goes the referee. The fans immediately look at the entrance ramp, which shows how jaded they are.

Booker makes his real comeback and hits the axe kick but there’s no referee. Down goes the referee for a second time and Booker gets crotched. Steiner busts out the “Frankensteiner” for two. He pulls out a foreign object and clocks Booker with it for the title. The fans are NOT pleased with that ending.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen worse but the middle part of this was just dreadful. Scott was at least selling here but it wasn’t anything great. This would be the beginning of the mega push that the Steiners got this summer for absolutely no apparent reason other than they were old which is how you get pushed in this company. Still though, not much although Booker would get a lot better push in about a year. Also in a little trivia for you: Scott would win the US Title in a tournament final the next year at Spring Stampede as well.

Recap of Nash vs. Goldberg, although they’re just clips with no actual talking to them.

Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg

Apparently this is the rematch from Starrcade or something. Liz and Luger are here with Nash. Nash says something on the mic but the mic doesn’t seem to work because I didn’t hear a thing. He drives Goldberg to the corner and pounds away knees in the corner. The fans are looking at something to the right of the ring and Nash continues to go as slowly as he can while still being considered alive.

The fans almost immediately chant for Sting as Nash gets a two count. He hits the side slam for another two as this has been completely one sided. The running hip attack to the back of Goldberg while he’s in the 619 position keeps the bald one down. Goldberg snaps off a shoulder block though and something like a hooking superkick to load up the spear. NASH JUMPS OVER GOLDBERG!!! The spear hits the referee so Luger pops Goldberg with the chair. Goldberg blocks the powerbomb with a handful of balls. Spear and Jackhammer end this.

Rating: D+. What in the world was the point of this? Goldberg hit like 5 moves and dominated so he’s back to the point where he used to be, minus the title that is. Still though, was there a point to having this be like seven minutes long? It wasn’t horrible, but I’m sitting here asking if that’s it. Also, was there a point to Luger and Liz being out there? I don’t see it if there was.

Video on the main event. Flair turned heel to win the title last month off Hogan and Page and Sting are there so there can be four guys in it. Savage is guest referee for no apparent reason.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sting vs. Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan

No Michael Buffer for the intros. No tags here and it’s one fall to a finish. This is one of the final matches under the People’s Champion era for Page. Flair is champion and comes out first for some reason. He and Sting pair off as Page fights Hogan. Those two never had a big PPV title match that I remember. Sting almost gets the Deathlock on Page inside a minute but DDP makes the rope.

Hogan and Flair fight up the ramp as Page tries a Diamond Cutter. Everyone back in now and it’s getting hard to call all of this. Sting slams Flair off the top which makes things feel right. Hogan takes the weight belt off and whips at the champ as STING ACTUALLY HITS THE STINGER SPLASH AGAINST THE RAILING!!! I’ve been watching him over twenty years and I’ve never seen him hit that.

The weight belt goes back on as it’s just Hogan vs. Flair in the ring at the moment. Hulk no sells the chops and hits the boot and leg. Sting hooked the Scorpion just before that and has to let it go to break up the pin. Flair gets in a shot at Hogan’s knee, because that’s gone so well before right? The Figure Four goes on and Sting misses his second attempt at a splash.

Hogan turns the hold over and Page has to break it up. Page knocks Flair to the floor and we get the Figure Four around the post on Hogan. The trainer runs out to check on Hogan and he has to leave. Even Bischoff comes out to check on him. So it’s a triple threat now and they’re all in the ring. Sting beats up Flair while Page just chills. Flair, after eleven years, still doesn’t get that chops don’t work on Sting. Flair Flip in the corner and he gets clotheslined to the floor.

Page works on Sting’s ribs but Flair is back in now. Discus lariat gets two. Savage is counting slow and hasn’t meant a thing yet. Stinger Splash hits Page and he slams DDP’s face into the mat. Page tombstones Sting for two as Flair breaks it up. Sting superplexes Flair for two. Page puts a sleeper on Flair who has a sleeper on Sting. Sting hits a jawbreaker on both and they’re all up at 9.

Sting gets double teamed and THAT STILL DOESN’T WORK ON HIM. He hits a double clothesline and beats them both down. Splashes for both guys but Page breaks up the Deathlock on Flair. Death Drop takes Page down but Sting can’t cover. Flair puts the Figure Four on Sting and Sting makes the ropes. Flair won’t break it so Savage drags them to the middle of the ring and drops the elbow (Sky Elbow according to Tony) to break it up. A Diamond Cutter to Flair gives Page his first world title.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match ever but I really don’t get what Savage was needed in there for other than a single move. A lot of this dragged really badly but they at least did something. It may not have been interesting but they were doing something. Page turned heel soon after this and it bombed HORRIBLY because people had gotten behind him for being the scrappy underdog that kept pushing until he reached the top. As in like Hardy whose heel turn also bombed. Funny how that works isn’t it?

Overall Rating: C+. WOW this was so much better than the previous two shows. I mean man this was a breath of fresh air and a lot of that is because they had some relatively clean endings. You couple that with longer matches and only one match that had no business being on PPV (arguably) and you get a decent show. It’s nothing great but it’s certainly better than the two that follow this one.

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What Do You Want To See From Me?

Simple question: what kind of content do you want on here?  I’m not at all saying I’ll change the style I’ve been using, but what would you like to see as far as content?The style of the reviews isn’t going to change and I’m going to be doing the regular TV shows no matter what.  Aside from that, what would you like to see?




EOTY Awards – Show of the Year

And I mean PPV, not Raw/Impact etc.It’s hard to go against Money in the Bank.  I mean, you had two great matches and one classic with a great moment to end it.  Just an all around great show and nothing all year comes close to it.

 

Your picks/thoughts?




Slamboree 1999 – I’ve Got Nothing Left

Slamboree 1999
Date: May 9, 1999
Location: TWA Dome, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 20,516
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

Another WCW PPV for you here. This one looks a little less boring than the Bash, but that’s not really saying much. The main event here is Page, the world champion, defending against Nash. We also get the first bout in the EPIC Flair vs. Piper feud, and I’m sure you’re all dying to see that. Let’s get to it.

We open with your standard video talking about a big match tonight, which here is Goldberg vs. Sting. Also Flair vs. Piper plus a few others but it’s mainly those two.

Tony is in a leather jacket for some reason. The announcers run down the card.

Tag Titles: Raven/Perry Saturn vs. Billy Kidman/Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko

Raven and Saturn are back together again for some reason. The Horsemen (Benoit and Malenko) are heels. Raven and Saturn are rather popular. I really like WCW’s style in these matches as three are three men in the ring at once. Oh and Rey/Kidman are the champions. Kidman, Dean and Saturn start us off. Saturn is in a skirt due to a long story with Jericho.

Malenko gets beaten down and Saturn beats up Benoit who I guess got a tag. Saturn throws Kidman over the top in a release belly to belly. That landing looked SICK. You can’t tag someone from another team in this match. BIG Horsemen Suck chant. Raven covers Benoit and avoids a slingshot leg from Rey. Benoit and Kidman drape Raven over the top and then Benoit smashes Billy.

This is a very fast paced match so it’s hard to keep up with everything. A top rope splash by Kidman misses Benoit as Raven is on the floor. He manages to break up the Crossface though and double teams Benoit with Saturn. Frog splash to Benoit gets two. In a move that literally made my jaw drop, Dean launches Rey over his shoulder and Rey LANDS ON THE BUCKLE ON HIS FEET and hits a moonsault press for two. THAT WAS AWESOME.

Saturn dives on everyone not named Benoit and Raven. Benoit hits the Swan Dive to Raven for two but Saturn saves. The Horsemen double team Rey and now they beat up Saturn. The tagging aspect has been dropped for the time being. And of course just as I say that it’s officially Benoit vs. Kidman vs. Saturn. Kidman fights back and the fans cheer. BIG superkick from Saturn takes him down though. The crowd is really into this.

Benoit hits a springboard forearm over the top (think Jericho and his dropkick to the apron) to take out Saturn. The two of them are in the ring and a northern lights suplex gets two for the Canadian. Here are the Rolling Germans but Kidman makes the save. Dean gets a tag and gets rolled up by Saturn in a reversal to the Cloverleaf. Saturn is knocked to the floor and things slow down a bit.

Dean is like screw slow and KILLS Kidman with a powerbomb for two. Dragon Suplex to Kidman gets a delayed two. Dean tries to throw Billy into the air but Kidman hits a dropkick in mid air to break it up. Russian legsweep takes Benoit down and there’s the tag to Raven for a big reaction. He hits what we would call Three Amigos to Benoit for two. Back to Saturn who is a bit spent.

Rey vs. Saturn vs. Benoit at this point. Saturn saves a pin on Rey as Malenko and Kidman come in. Saturn and Benoit are down and Kidman isn’t sure who to jump on. Dean tries another powerbomb on him but Kidman rolls into a sunset flip. Everything breaks down and the champs hit a SWEET alley-oop rana to Benoit in the corner. They try it on Saturn but he hits a top rope sitout powerbomb to Rey for two. Arn comes in and hits a spinebuster on Saturn to HUGE heel heat. Someone in a Sting mask breaks up the Shooting Star by crotching Kidman. An elevated Even Flow gives Raven/Saturn the belts. Kanyon was in the mask.

Rating: B. This is better than probably any other match I’ve seen in all of WCW so far in 1999. They were all over the place in here and beating the living tar out of each other, which is the best thing you can ask for. Also the popular team wins off a big ending with the DDT. Very good match, but now things are going to fall through the floor, which is WCW in a nutshell.

Video on DDP.

Konnan vs. Stevie Ray

Horace and Vincent of the NWO Black and White are with Ray. The fans here in St. Louis are awesome as they’ll cheer for any face and boo any heel. Why is that so complex? Ray pounds him down in the corner but Konnan pounds him on the middle rope while making oral sex gestures. Vincent gets on the apron to break up a pin attempt. He cheats a bit more on the floor and the fans aren’t all that thrilled here.

Off to a chinlock as Ray thinks of something new he can do other than kicks and forearms. He chokes away which is at least new. Back to the chinlock for more time in the think tank. Suplex gets two and there’s the jump off the ropes into a boot spot. Konnan speeds things up and messes up a leapfrog. X Factor puts Ray down but Horace trips K-Dawg up. Here’s Rey to distract the goons and Konnan wins with a rollup (with a pretty fast count).

Rating: D-. Really dull match here but at least it was kind of logical: once Rey is there to counteract Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber, Konnan can get the pin on his own. Stevie is just so freaking boring without Booker there to help him out that there’s no need to have him out here, especially on a PPV. Boring match and not any good at all.

Video on Kevin Nash.

Video on Sting.

Page talks to Bigelow in the back but we can’t hear what’s being said.

Brian Knobbs vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

This is for the moniker King of Hardcore, which isn’t an official title. This of course is a hardcore match if you didn’t get the idea there. There isn’t going to be much to talk about in this. It’s your standard hardcore match with both guys being hit in the head with generic pieces of metal. There’s an RVD sign in the crowd. Heenan tells the announcers to be quiet so he can hear the weapon shots.

Bigelow hits a top rope headbutt for two. Out to the floor and there’s still nothing to talk about. It’s pretty much the same as every hardcore match you’ll ever see. Knobbs’ trashcan shot is blocked by a waiter’s tray which winds up going on top of Brian’s head. Bigelow is in control here. The fans want a table. There are long stretches here where there’s nothing to talk about. It’s just random weapon shots and the announcers laughing.

They fight up the aisle with Knobbs using a trashcan to keep control. There’s the internet location getting its required cameo. They go old school here with the fake souvenir stand that no fan would be able to get to because it’s on the arena floor. We go behind a curtain (revealing about 1/5 of the arena being tarped off) and there’s a ladder shot. An elbow off the stands onto a table misses for Knobbs (I think, you can’t see anything) and Bigelow suplexes him through the table for the pin.

Rating: F. Heenan’s final line of “and they do this for a living” sums things up well. Why in the world did Knobbs of all people have a job here? The match sucked due to there being nothing interesting here at all. There was no comedy spot, there was nothing other than the most basic weapons available, and nothing interesting happened at all. Bad match and really boring. Also it ran almost 12 minutes. Inexcusable.

We recap Rick Steiner vs. Booker. Booker won a match against Steiner with help from Stevie, who is in the NWO (Booker never was). Ray saved him again but Rick came in to beat him up. Rick vs. Booker started up again so let’s have a TV Title match again.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Booker T

Booker is champion here if I didn’t make that clear. Rick starts out with a belly to belly release and a couple of Steiner Lines. I think he’s the heel here but I’m not sure. More control by Steiner until Booker kicks him in the face to put him down. Steiner pops up of course because he isn’t going to sell anything. Off to a chinlock by Booker. I think he’s either heel here or borderline heel.

Steiner takes over on the floor and things slow way down. Time for a chinlock again. The crowd is very quiet. Steiner punches a lot and the fans don’t care. A bunch of punches gets two and here’s that chinlock again. Booker fights back and hits the axe kick, a spinebuster and the missile dropkick but STEINER WON’T SELL THEM. Here’s what happens after every move: Steiner lays there about 2-4 seconds then gets up like nothing happened. Scott finally runs out for the distraction and a Steiner Line gets two. Scott trips Booker and the Bulldog off the ropes gives Rick the title.

Rating: D. Just a horribly boring match here as Rick is beyond worthless in the ring at this point. Naturally the answer to that is to give him a title for four months. He wouldn’t sell ANYTHING Booker did here and Booker looks like a joke as a result. Bad match but as usual, most of it is due to Rick being lazy and not selling anything.

Time to recap the stupid match of the show. Randy Savage is out of wrestling at this point so he’s putting one of his chicks (the hot one) in there against Lil Naitch in the form of referee Charles Robinson. Yes this match is happening.

Rick rambles to Buff in the back and wishes him luck against Scott later. Gee, that must be totally genuine right?

Gorgeous George vs. Charles Robinson

Ok to be fair, Robinson’s Flair costume is AWESOME. He has the robe, he has the hair, he looks exactly like a small Nature Boy. Even his face looks like him. Flair and Savage are seconds here. Asya and the other chicks are here too. To be fair, George was indeed hot. Flair, the President of WCW at the time, says he’d like to have Madusa ride Space Mountain. Miss Maddness can come too, but George is being saved for Robinson. Robinson rips George a bit and he sounds EXACTLY like Flair. This is the best imitation I’ve seen in years. Savage (POP) says George will win.

Robinson struts a lot as they stall for a few minutes. George goes after the arm and Robinson reverses. Off to a full nelson and snapmare as George is dominant. Flair and Robinson get rammed together so Savage has to come in and protect George. Robinson goes for a chair but Miss Madness steals it. She gets slammed outside and Savage FREAKS. I mean freaks by his standards.

Back in Robinson takes over with a choke and then does more of that. George comes back with a few chops and Robinson does the flip in the corner and runs the apron, only to get slammed off the top. Heenan says this is great and I can’t say I disagree. There’s a Flair Flop and they’re getting tired. The heels cheat a bit and work over George’s knee but Madusa makes the save.

Robinson works on the knee and if the match continues like it has, that means we’re heading for the Figure Four. He hooks the knee a bit and cranks on it for awhile. Here’s the Figure Four and while it looks good, it’s on the wrong knee. She reverses it and Flair comes in for the save. Savage chases him off and beats up Robinson so George can drop a half decent looking middle rope elbow for the pin. Savage is reinstated.

Rating: D. Yes it was bad, but at the end of the day we have a referee and a manager in there. Robinson’s Flair impression is absolutely excellent and one of the best I’ve ever seen. George really is gorgeous and it’s a shame she wasn’t around in wrestling more than she was. That being said, this was decent enough all things considered. Ten and a half minutes was too long, but it wasn’t boring and they were trying which is more important than anything else.

We recap Scott Steiner vs. Buff Bagwell. Bagwell was a face and made fun of him so Steiner said he had a big ego. Bagwell imitated him and it wasn’t really funny.

US Title: Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Since Bagwell never won a singles title, I think you know who is champion coming in. Buff jumps him before the bell and Steiner still has the belt on. Swinging neckbreaker gets two. Scott hits him low and there’s the Push-Up elbow. Buff gets thrown to the floor and Steiner yells at some fans. Things slow WAY down with Steiner on offense. It was a running theme with the Steiners at this point.

Scott chokes away and yells at another fan. Much like in the Rick match, you may be noticing a pattern emerging here. They go to the mat and Steiner elbows him a lot. He runs to the floor and brings in a chair. If that shot had hit Steiner would have been facing 10-15 years. Bagwell fights back but there goes the referee. Buff gets the chair and here’s Rick to turn heel on Buff and whack him with the chair. The Recliner keeps the title on Scott.

Rating: D-. I can’t take many more of these bad matches. I mean the people in them are just SO lazy with them laying around and doing nothing of note. Scott and Rick are back together as the Steiners and both have singles titles. You know, because that’s what the people wanted to see and would light the world on fire. Benoit and Jericho and Malenko? Who are they?

Video on Goldberg. These videos are just their music playing over clips of them. They only last about 15-20 seconds each.

Now to really crank it up, here’s a video on all four people in the main events. There aren’t any words to this so the feuds still aren’t explained.

The third straight video (at least they’re short) is on Flair being president and being insane. He’s signing contracts without reading them and one of them is for a match with Piper for the Presidency. Flair thinks he’s President of the United States. I kid you not, this was the second biggest wrestling company in the world at this point. Oh and he went to a mental hospital and thought he was in a hotel. Again, this is what we mean when we say insulting to our intelligence.

Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair

The winner is the president. Before things get going, referee Johnny Boone is fired and Charles Robinson replaces him. Flair runs his mouth and gets slapped to get us going. Piper knocks him to the floor and let’s take a break after that. He boxes Flair, seemingly hitting him in the chest and neck, but Flair falls anyway. He hits a low blow to take over and Robinson yells at Piper for choking.

Flair yells at Anderson to beat on Piper when he throws him outside. Flair throws Piper outside and Anderson beats on him. Asya comes in for a low blow and this is about as far from serious as you could want it to be. Flair chops away in the corner and Piper chops back. Robinson cheats on a cover and says Flair keeps getting his shoulder up. There’s the Flair Flip in the corner and they go to the outside.

Piper rams Flair’s head into Flair’s arm but we’ll say it was the post anyway. Back in the ring they ram heads and both guys are down. After about 2 seconds of leg softening here’s the Figure Four. Piper tries a sunset flip and there go the trunks. He hooks Flair in the Figure Four and Flair screams that he gives up but Robinson ignores it. Anderson breaks it up but gets thrown in a sleeper. Now Flair in the sleeper. Asya runs in and gets kissed and put in a sleeper as well. The referee gets decked and Flair hits Piper with an illegal object for the pin.

Rating: The chipmunk has pneumonia. I better take him to the embassy before he deletes the remote control of reality and I run out of apple juice. If he does that, there will be a great and mighty feast in the great archway of the flippyflook.

And that was more logical than putting this match on PPV. But wait: there’s more.

Here’s Eric Bischoff who hasn’t been seen in awhile and has no authority whatsoever in this company. He says Piper is the winner and that Flair can bite him. Somehow this stands. Eric and Piper hug to a face pop (intentional I’d assume but who knows with this company?) and Piper fires Flair. Just….yeah.

Recap of Sting vs. Goldberg. This is for who the franchise is or something.

Sting vs. Goldberg

Tony is either trying to explain what we just saw or is questioning it himself. I’m really not sure. I’m also not sure why this match is happening but who cares? Sting has white boots with black toes. It makes as much sense as anything else here. Goldberg takes him down and snaps off a powerslam for no cover. Sting stalls on the floor and then takes Goldberg to the floor with a clothesline.

Goldberg hooks a cross armbreaker but it isn’t on correctly. Sting fights out of it and we go to a test of strength. He takes out Goldberg’s braced knee (oh sweet psychology, how I missed you) and puts on a Boston Crab which is quickly broken. Goldberg fights back with power moves and things slow WAY down. Top rope clothesline by Sting sets up some Stinger Splashes but Goldberg catches him in a spinebuster which is called a spear. And here’s Bret Hart with a chair and it’s a no contest.

Rating: D. Another bad match. I mean seriously, this show SUCKS. There’s been nothing but boring matches (aside from the opener) and stuff that is basically around to set up matches on Nitro rather than HERE ON THE FREAKING PPV. Nothing to see here as they basically kept it as slow gear as possible.

And then the Steiners run out and beat up Goldberg and Sting. WHY ARE THEY THE FOCAL POINT OF A SHOW IN 1999????

Another wordless video on Page vs. Nash. No word on why they’re fighting but there’s clearly no thinking anywhere else in this show so who cares?

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash

And Buffer’s mic doesn’t work right. Seriously, fold already. You can hear him in the arena but not over the PPV feed. Page is champion. Early Cutter attempt is blocked and Page hits the floor. We actually get a reference to the Vegas Connection. Page hammers away but runs his mouth to get himself sent to the floor. Back inside and Nash hammers away. Page charges at Nash and finally kicks him low to take over.

Page rips a buckle off and hits him with the mic for two. He gets sent into the exposed steel though and both guys are down. Page takes over and sends him to the floor. A baseball slide puts Nash down and there’s a Diamond Cutter to kill Nash out there. It only gets two in the ring but at least there was a delay. Now Page goes for the knee for no apparent reason.

He wraps it around the post a few times and pounds on Nash again. There’s something going on in the crowd so they change the camera angle, which is pretty smart. Nash makes his comeback and hits Snake Eyes onto the buckle. Back to the regular angle. Nash….at least limp. Big boot and Jackknife….but here’s Savage to break it up for the LAME DQ. So is he a heel now too?

I would rate it here, but Eric comes out AGAIN and restarts the match. Russian legsweep gets two for the champ. Discus lariat gets the same. And here’s a sleeper, which looks awful because Nash is so tall. Now Nash hooks an even WORSE sleeper but Page jawbreaks his way out of it for two. A chair shot hits the rope and Page takes it in the face for two. Low blow gets two for Page. And then Nash kicks the chair into Page’s face, takes the straps down and wins the title via the Jackknife.

Rating: D. The fans popped for the ending, but I’m just spent at this point. There’s nothing interesting here and the run in and restart made no sense, which is what the name of the show should be. Nash would hold the title for a few months before dropping it to Savage before Hogan took it the next night. This was nothing interesting at all and the knee selling coming and going hurt things.

Overall Rating: F-. This is usually were I’d make some witty statement about how this show was so bad it goes beyond bad ratings or something, but there’s nothing left in me after watching this mess. The illogical stories, the stupid booking, the overdoing it with the Steiners, the worthless world title change, and the bad matches just made me completely uninterested by the end of this show. I haven’t felt like that about a PPV in a very long time, but this just drained me completely.

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Monday Night Raw – December 26, 2011 – GET THAT MASKED MAN A HUG!

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 26, 2011
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

After last week’s solid show, we close out the year with this one. There are still five weeks before the Rumble so they could easily burn another show here and things would still be fine. It should be interesting to see where they go here because there really aren’t any matches set up for the PPV, other than maybe Ziggler vs. Ryder II. Other than that there isn’t anything really clear. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Punk….and never mind as it’s Ace coming out to his music and in a Punk shirt. He says it’s a microcosm of the unpredictability that you’ve gotten under his leadership. The future begins tonight and here’s Punk. After a loud chant for him, he says that if he didn’t know any better, Ace is trying to antagonize him. Why shouldn’t Punk just kick him in the face right now? Ace says he can’t because he’ll get fired.

Tonight, Punk has the night off. Oh and he’s kidding again. Tonight Punk is wrestling up to three times in a gauntlet match. If any of them beats him, that person gets a title shot next week. Punk wants to know what happens if he wins all three matches. Ace doesn’t know, so Punk suggests he gets a shot at Ace if he does. Ace eventually agrees. Punk’s posing is cut off by the latest video. It says he is coming and that he’ll reclaim what is his. The words this time are The End Begins Next Monday.

Booker T vs. Cody Rhodes

Non-title here. Cole and Jerry has an actual lighthearted argument over who sang Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Hiptoss gives Booker an early advantage and a slam gets two. Snap suplex gets one. Axe kick misses though and Rhodes takes over with a neckbreaker. Out to the floor goes Booker and we take a break. Back with Booker taking over. He spins into the corner though and an elbow takes him down. Off to a crossface chickenwing

Clothesline gets two for Cody. The fans of course chant for Booker and Cody is getting frustrated. Booker fights back and it’s boo/yay tonight. Cody dropkicks him down and works the arm. Camel clutch goes on and Booker gets sent into the corner. He gets his feet up though and looks like he needs oxygen. Side slam gets two. The Jack Brisco sunset flip doesn’t look that good as it gets two. Rollup gets two for Cody. The Beautiful Disaster looks to have been short and it gets two. Cross Rhodes is countered but the side kick misses. The axe kick hits though and it gets the clean pin at 12:06.

Rating: C. The sloppiness hurt it and I’m not sure I like the idea of Cody losing clean. Booker looked kind of old here, but it’s what, his fourth match this year? Not bad and I guess the rematch is coming at the Rumble? Also the booking isn’t bad as he lost when he got beaten down before the match but wins when it’s even. That’s not as bad.

Ryder tells Cena that he owes Cena for everything. Cena says no, you don’t. Everything was Ryder getting here on his own. Cena is going a-Kane hunting though.

Jerry got a note saying that we’ll learn the three opponents for Ace soon. Oh ok he’s going to announce them. The three opponents are Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler and Mark Henry.

Kelly has some weird flirting moment with Show when a referee says he’s needed elsewhere.

Ace says Brodus is debuting next week on Raw. Show comes in and Ace talks about Otunga jumping him last week. Otunga says that’s a lawsuit and Show says he can beat Otunga with an arm behind his back.

Swagger and Ziggler trade insults when Vickie comes in and says it doesn’t matter who gets the show. Henry comes in and says excuse me. Ok then.

Eve Torres/Zack Ryder vs. Tyson Kidd/Natalya

….seriously? This is kind of a step down for Ryder isn’t it? Eh well he was getting over and he wasn’t in the original WWE plans so you know they’re not going to be happy with it. Cole says that July 23rd will be the 1000th episode of Raw. Oh my that could be BAD. The guys start and nothing happens so it’s off to the chicks. Eve does her dancing moonsault and it’s back to the guys. We get stereo Broski Boots and the Rough Ryder ends this at 3:00. No idea why Ryder was in this.

Here’s Cena who isn’t well received by the fans. He acknowledges that the fans aren’t happy with him and there’s a Cena Sucks chant. Cena talks about how there’s magic in this building in the form of three Wrestlemanias. Chicago inducted Eddie Guerrero into the Hall of Fame, which draws an Eddie chant. Also, right here in this building, CM Punk beat him for the WWE Championship.

New York is considered the capital of the WWE, but after seeing another show like this here in Chicago, he’s not sure about that. Cena has somehow gotten the Chicago crowd on his side. Right now though, he’s going to call out Kane. Cue Miz instead. Miz wants to face him right now because the win at Mania was tainted. Miz wants Rock to beat Cena and tonight he wants the last image of 2011 to be him standing tall over Cena. Cena wants Miz to shut up and wash the tan off his body. Get a referee out here right now and let’s do it.

John Cena vs. The Miz

The fan that catches Cena’s shirt won’t throw it back. Good, he’d be stupid to do so. Cena controls early with a headlock and the fans are split on him. That’s a step up for him in Chicago. Miz heads to the floor and grabs a mic. The fans are chanting for the wrong person so he’s out of here. It’s a countout at 2:30, most of which happened during Miz ranting against Chicago.

Miz sets for his catchphrase and here’s R-Truth for the on the floor brawl. So I guess Truth is face again. He destroys Miz and says he could finish Miz right now, but there’s no fun in that. It’s like Christmas: once you open the presents, it’s all over. Every Monday Night should be like Christmas, so he’s going to take his time getting to Miz, because Little Jimmy says it’s ok. Truth hits him with a water bottle to end this.

Kane is officially here.

Big Show vs. David Otunga

Show must have an arm tied behind his back. It’s the right arm too so there’s no knockout punch or chokeslam. He’ll be at the relentless mercy of the offense of DAVID OTUNGA. Otunga gets sent to the floor and here’s Mark Henry. The match is officially thrown out at 2:00 despite Henry not touching him.

Henry clotheslines him down and here’s Bryan to distract show. He runs and Henry gets the arm loose. Otunga breaks up a chokeslam and takes it himself. Show officially wins by DQ. HENRY NEVER TOUCHED HIM!!!!

Here’s Del Rio but in a wheelchair. Ricardo, in a neckbrace, does the intro anyway. Jerry makes me laugh by giving us the information of the wheelchair, which is valued at about $200! Del Rio confirms the true rumor that he tore his groin last week. He says he’ll be back and here are the Bellas to berate the crowd. One of them says they’ll throw a party in his honor. It’s Nikki apparently. They get in an argument over who gets to throw the party so Alberto yells at them. He throws them out and blast it as they were looking good tonight. His New Year’s Resolution is that he’ll be champion again.

CM Punk vs. Jack Swagger/Dolph Ziggler/Mark Henry

It’s a gauntlet match and if someone beats Punk, they get a title shot next week. If Punk sweeps it, he gets a match with Ace, presumably tonight. The opponents are in the order listed so Swagger is up first. Swagger hooks a test of strength but Punk stays on his head to keep from going down. Here come the kicks but Jack comes back with a gutbuster to take over.

Punk tries a cross body off the top but Swagger (almost) catches him in another gutbuster for two. At least he has a strategy. He sets for the Vader Bomb but Punk jumps up and catches him in the GTS position. That doesn’t work so Punk kicks him in the head for the pin at 3:27. Here’s Ziggler next but Swagger takes out the knee almost immediately before the bell.

Punk says he can go and we take a break. Back with Ziggler working on the knee. Sweet dropkick gets two for Dolph. Punk fights back with a slingshot and tries a neckbreaker but Dolph goes back to the leg. Off to a half crab which lasts awhile. Punk fights back and the knee isn’t hurting so much now.

Using the good leg he fires off some kicks to the back and a big kick to the head for two. Fameasser is blocked and there’s the running knee in the corner. Vickie breaks up the GTS and the Fameasser hits this time for two. Cue Johnny Ace who ejects Vickie and Swagger. This is happening while Punk has Ziggler covered. The distraction lets the Zig Zag end Punk at 13:27.

Rating: C+. This was the ending I expected actually. It seemed too easy to go the way it was looking. Ziggler vs. Punk could be awesome if they give it enough time, which they probably won’t. Decent stuff here though and it’s good to see Dolph getting a chance to headline a Raw as he’s earned so far.

Here’s Kane to end the show. He talks about how the mask is his real face and everyone else is hiding. Cue Cena but Kane throws up a wall of fire to stop him. Kane says Cena is his target because Cena preaches to rise above hate. This world is a dark place and people should hate. Everyone hates, so why rise above it? He says that there’s hatred in Cena but he’s hiding from it. There’s a Cena chant. In Chicago. Man that’s scary.

Kane talks about how Cena will be free once he embraces the hate. Now the chant is dueling so the world is more correct. The people are going to help Cena embrace his hate. The last thing Cena will hear is them chanting Cena sucks. Kane needs some lessons from the Spirit Squad because they don’t go along with Kane’s idea. There’s a mild dueling chant and Cena has to overact and make it seem like it was deafining. He hangs his head to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I wasn’t so huge on this show. There’s some ok stuff in here but the show felt like other than the beginning, there was a lot of stuff just thrown in there with no real thinking behind it. I liked the ending as we got a reasonable (by Kane’s standards) explanation of why he’s going after Cena. Dolph vs. Punk should be good and that’s what they’re shooting for here, which is ok. Not a terrible show but kind of weak.

Results
Booker T b. Cody Rhodes – Axe Kick
Zack Ryder/Eve Torres b. Tyson Kidd/Natalya – Rough Ryder to Kidd
John Cena b. The Miz via countout
Big Show b. David Otunga via DQ when Mark Henry interfered
Dolph Ziggler b. CM Punk – Zig Zag

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EOTY Awards – Worst Angle of the Year

There are a bunch of options for this.But it’s pretty easily Cole in general.  If I had to specify something, it’s the overuse of Twitter.  If you look at the Survivor Series buyrate, it came in low.  Do you think that if maybe Rock had gotten something other than Cena’s Lady Parts trending it might have been better?  Like maybe, Survivor Series This Sunday?  That’s the problem with this Twitter obsession: they’re using it for the wrong things.  Who cares if Alicia Fox is trending?  She’s on TV for a minute a week.  Get something where it’s advertising a PPV or better yet, ADVERTISE THE FREAKING PPV.  I’ll stop there because I could go on for a week about this.

 

Your thoughts/picks?




Great American Bash 1999 – One Of The Worst Shows I’ve Ever Seen

Great American Bash 1999
Date: June 13, 1999
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 11,672
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

This isn’t intentionally after the other GAB reviews I was doing. It just turned out that way. This is one of the last shows under Nash’s time with the book and therefore, it’s technically ok but it’s not interesting at all for the most part. The main event is Nash vs. Savage for Nash’s title. Other than that it’s your run of the mill show of the last year WCW had any prayer of ever making a comeback to at least respectable. Let’s get to it.

Master P. and his group of guys, the No Limit Soldiers, arrive. Curt Hennig pops up and praises him, saying P is the king of rap. He asks for an autograph and P says sure, signing a CD for him. Hennig destroys it and the rap vs. country feud is on. You know, for a southern based company. Yeah, let’s make a rap group faces here and pay P over 200 grand per appearance, yes I said PER APPEARANCE, and expect him to be popular.

The opening video is about Nash vs. Savage, who have been terrorizing each other while Savage wears a big pink fur coat. Savage: “You’re a stupid person.” A lot of mud was slung, and I mean that literally. This was the thick of the Hummer Driver angle, where someone was driving a big white Hummer and trying to run people over with it. The driver was never officially revealed, but it was heavily implied to be one of about 5 people. You know, I spent a long time trying to figure out why WCW died, and the best answer I can give you is to watch the show and you’ll get it yourself.

The announcers actually recap the Hennig vs. Master P showdown. IT WAS THREE MINUTES AGO!!! They talk about Nash vs. Savage a bit.

Here’s a video on….well on almost every match on the card. Is there a reason they’re filling in time like this?

Now here’s a video just on Knobbs vs. Hak (Sandman) which is the opener. Knobbs has joined the First Family, which is Jimmy Hart’s lower card stable.

Brian Knobbs vs. Hardcore Hak

WCW tried a Hardcore Division but this is a kendo stick match, whatever that means. Is that…..is that……is that a cover of My Sharona that Knobbs is coming out to? Why in the world is he coming out to a cover of My Sharona? Brian says it’s Mrs. Nasty’s birthday today. I wonder if he’s going to take her to the Baltimore Science Museum and do science experiments with her. He wants this to be just a hardcore match. Hak comes out to what used to be Mongo’s music. He walks around the ring for awhile and wastes even more time.

Knobbs wants a hardcore match and the way to do that is to throw the weapons out. The opening bell is at 12:42 into the show. Knobbs hits Hak with a trashcan and then hits him with the lid of it. At least he’s complete with his assault. There’s a Pit Stop and Hak gets hit in the head again. He gets his feet up to kick a chair back into Knobbs’ face and momentum shifts. I would say the pendulum has swung but I’m not bringing Gorilla into this.

Here comes a ladder and it gets thrown at Knobbs from the floor. A slingshot legdrop hits the ladder but Knobbs sells it anyway. The leg gets put around Knobbs’ leg and hit with a chair. Knobbs sends him into the ladder. There isn’t going to be much more than this people. Then again, that’s all there needs to be here. Knobbs beats him down again and the fans chant for Hak.

Hak makes a comeback and tries a Swanton onto the ladder but Knobbs moves. Tony suggests a table and the fans want one as well. We don’t get one though as Hak throws him into a chair, which isn’t something you see every day. That and a shot from a kendo stick is enough for the pin.

Rating: D. Yes it was bad, but the whole point of this was to get the crowd into things and these matches usually did that. Besides, it’s not like either of these guys are good for anything else but Knobbs is a Hoganite so they have to have something for him right? Nothing match but it was fine for what it was.

Hugh Morrus and Knobbs destroy Hak post match.

Buff Bagwell thanks Piper for giving him a big match (it’s against Disco Inferno) and says he’ll have Piper’s back in the match with Flair tonight for the presidency.

Van Hammer vs. Mikey Whipwreck

So Whipwreck was a crowd favorite in ECW so he came to WCW and did nothing. This resulted in him being mentioned in a booking meeting and Kevin Nash, the booker, not knowing who he was. Hammer was in the middle of a moderate push so he’ll be killing Mikey here. The announcers talk about who’s driving the Hummer to kill time because this match is going to be very boring.

Hammer beats on Mikey whose speed moves aren’t working at all. He tries a monkey flip but Hammer grabs him by the head and slams him off the top. The fans chant boring and I can’t exactly disagree. A delayed vertical suplex gets NO pop. You can tell that a match is dull when a move which is an incredible power display like that just quiets the crowd.

Time for an abdominal stretch. This was the only match not advertised in the opening montage. If that surprises you, it shouldn’t. Out to the floor and Mikey gets dropped onto the barricade. A dive to the floor keeps Mikey down. Back in Whipwreck comes off the top for two. And then he jumps into a release spinebuster and a cobra clutch slam for the pin.

Rating: D-. Why in the world was this on PPV? Van Hammer got a push around this time but it went nowhere because Rick Steiner destroyed him at Bash at the Beach. Whipwreck would be back in ECW later in the year along with Sandman, which they probably never should have left in the first place. However, how can you turn down the huge money?

Buff Bagwell vs. Disco Inferno

….why? What did I ever do to WCW? I watched Nitro through 2000. Why are they doing this to me? Disco starts off with a neckbreaker so Bagwell hits the floor. Basic stuff to start here as Disco dances after every move he hits. Disco is the evil one here. Buff loads up the Blockbuster but Disco hits the floor. This is a rematch from Nitro which Bagwell won. Then why is it happening again?

They stall even more and work on the arm until Disco speeds things up and hits a clothesline to take over. Surprising amount of offense here from him. Disco goes up top and dances before hitting a middle rope elbow for two. He tries it again but Buff moves and takes over. Bagwell loads up the Blockbuster but Disco knocks him to the floor. Stunner (Last Dance, Disco’s finisher) hits on the floor but he doesn’t throw Buff back in. The Macarena Piledriver (exactly what it sounds like) is countered and Buff hammers him down. Blockbuster ends this clean.

Rating: D. Technically this was fine, but why in the world was this on PPV? It has to do with Piper giving the young guys a chance, but it’s not like that means anything for reasons you’ll see later on. Also, Bagwell is FAR better as a face than as a heel. He has some solid natural charisma, but they turned him heel so many times that it stopped meaning anything at all.

Recap of the Rednecks vs. the Rap Guys. It’s your standard culture clash feud and since it’s WCW, they missed the point of being a southern company and country being popular because they’re not that smart.

DJ Ran, a DJ who would shout and ask where the loudest section of the arena was, shouts and asks where the loudest section of the arena is. He brings out Master P and his No Limit Soldiers.

Konnan/Rey Mysterio vs. Curt Hennig/Bobby Duncum Jr.

Here’s another brilliant WCW moment for you: the Rednecks (officially named the West Texas Rednecks) had a song they performed themselves called Rap Is Crap. Being a southern company, it actually got on a few radio stations in Dixie and was requested a few times. Cool, free publicity right?

Now a smart company would release it as a single, maybe make a few dollars and possibly turn the Rednecks face right? Well since it’s WCW, they sent the radio stations cease and desist letters for using their material without permission. Vince may be crazy and not get it a lot of the time, but you know he’s know how to capitalize on something like that.

Anyway, Rey is Cruiserweight Champion and he and Konnan come out in gas masks. Konnan and Rey clear the ring quickly and Master P slaps Hennig in the back of the head. Konnan and Duncum start us off and it’s off to Rey quickly. He speeds things up but jumps into a backbreaker. Powerbomb brings in Hennig. Rey gets beaten down and I think we’re already into the middle of the match.

Konnan tries to come in but it allows for double teaming on the outside. Rey goes into the barricade and is in trouble. We keep looking at Master P to try desperately to validate paying him. SWEET standing dropkick takes Rey down. After a long beating, Konnan comes in but the referee missed the tag. The beating continues and Rey tries an Asai moonsault which doesn’t work.

Rey finally takes the leg out and there’s the tag to Konnan. Things break down and Hennig messes something up in the corner. I think it was miscommunication or something but it wasn’t all that bad. Bronco Buster hits him (called the Rough Rider here) and Konnan is down on the floor. Barry Windham runs out but one of the No Limit Soldiers runs in and hits Duncum for the pin for Rey.

Rating: C-. Again technically fine, but it would set up more of this feud later. Again though, they had no idea what the face/heel dynamic was supposed to be here and it didn’t really work at all. The match itself was ok, but I’m still not sure why this was on PPV. I’ve watched a little over an hour of this show and nothing at all has jumped out as being anything beyond a Nitro match.

Big pullapart brawl follows and security (one of them being future Natural Born Thriller Reno) breaks it up. Rey gets hogtied in the ring.

Ernest Miller vs. Scott Norton

This isn’t even good enough for Nitro. Apparently it is as this is the fourth or fifth match in a feud. Norton won a bunch to start and then Miller hit him with a crowbar to get the win. And never mind as for some reason, Horace Freaking Hogan comes out and says that since Cat (Miller) hit him on Monday also, Horace, who is in the NWO, gets the shot.

Ernest Miller vs. Horace Hogan

Yes, this match is actually happening. Horace is Hogan’s nephew and a decent looking power guy. He takes over to start but Miller gets in a kick to the face to take over. Now he stands around. Horace gets sent to the floor and Sonny Onoo kicks him a few times. The crowd is DEAD. Horace takes him down with a big boot and a splash gets two. Miller gets dumped to the floor where Onoo loads up the red shoe out of a briefcase. A superkick with it ends this.

Rating: F. Horace Hogan was on a PPV. I don’t think I need to explain why this is a failure.

We’re an hour and twenty minutes into this show and the best match has been the tag match which wasn’t even good enough to be a midcard match on a house show.

We recap Flair vs. Piper which is for the Presidency of the Company. Flair ran the company but the power went to his head so somehow Piper got a match for control of the company. They had this match last month and in some big mess, Piper got control. Even the Horsemen turned on Flair during this.

Ric Flair vs. Roddy Piper

Flair has Anderson and Asya with him. She’s a big bodybuilder and freakish looking and spells her name with a Y instead of an A. Get the joke? They trade chops in the corner and Flair is in trouble early. Piper pounds him down in the corner using his old man punches. Flair Flop and here are more chops. Randy Anderson (referee) blocks a punch and Flair still can’t take over.

Flair bails to the floor and this is going nowhere. Piper punches him down again but a low blow stops him. Arn cheats on the floor and there’s another low blow. Flair’s trunks get pulled down which Tony calls memorable. I call it old hat. Flair gets slammed off the top and Arn gets decked on the floor. A pretty bad looking sunset flip gets two. Off to a sleeper but Flair shoves him off. He pulls out a foreign object and down goes Piper. It gets two and here’s the Figure Four with Arn helping. Cue Bagwell for the save and Flair wins by DQ to become president again.

Rating: D-. Awful match as you would expect from two guys who are combined about 9,000 years old. No idea why they thought these two were the right idea instead of, I don’t know, having Bagwell and someone else as a surrogate for both guys to put the focus on them. That would make sense though and might get someone new up the card and we can’t have that.

Bagwell beats up Flair until Piper turns on him and sides with Flair and Anderson. Piper would become Vice President out of all this.

DJ Ran yells some more. Seriously, why does this guy exist?

We recap Rick Steiner vs. Sting. Tank Abbott is involved in this somehow. They had a cage match and Sting got beaten down by both guys.

Rick Steiner vs. Sting

Steiner is TV Champion and I have no idea if this is for the title or not. Nope it’s non-title. Also it’s No DQ and Falls Count Anywhere. This is new apparently. The interesting thing to do in Steiner matches here are to see how long he’ll actually sell a move for. If it’s over two seconds, he’s feeling generous. Steiner pounds him down but Sting comes back with a dropkick as they go to the floor.

Steiner hammers him some more, this time with a chair. They throw drinks at each other and Sting misses the Splash against the railing as is his custom. Piledriver on the floor gets two. Release German gets two back in the ring. Sting fights back and hits a Vader Bomb. The crowd is DEAD. Big top rope splash gets almost no reaction for two. And since Steiner has done enough, here’s a rest hold. Sting escapes and hits the Splash in the corner. There’s another and Sting hooks the Deathlock but Steiner goes to the ropes.

They head to the floor and it’s all about to fall apart. They fight up to the web location and into the back. The booing commences and Tank Abbott pops up with a towel to choke Sting. And here’s Scott Steiner RELEASING DOEBERMANS AND A ROTTEWEILER ON STING. The camera goes all weird like it’s in a bad horror movie. The dogs jump Sting and this is clearly edited because Scott Steiner is in a different place than he was about two seconds earlier.

Rating: Agoobwa. Yeah, I had to bust that out again. We just saw badly edited footage of dogs attacking Sting. My goodness. This company DESERVED to die. By the way, if you’ve ever been curious as to what I mean when I say something insults my intelligence as a wrestling fan, this is a fine example.

The Steiners come out and demand the referee declare Rick the winner. Whatever man. Oh and they’re both NWO. Great.

We recap the tag title situation. Bigelow/Page beat up Saturn/Raven, the tag champions. Kanyon had to replace Raven but got beaten down also. Page and Bigelow won the belts with ease. Flair, crooked and insane, offered to hook up with Benoit to win the titles. Flair walked out on him and Saturn came out to replace him and they won the titles in a rematch on Thursday. Kanyon joined Page/Bigelow and tonight the Triad gets their rematch.

That’s such backwards booking it makes my head hurt. I’m going to spoil this for you: the Triad gets the titles back here. This takes away the surprise of the match tonight. Now it’s 3-2 against the champions so they’re already against big odds. Instead of having Kanyon join them here where they win the titles, we blow the surprise early and make things less surprising an entertaining as a result. Nice job WCW.

Tag Titles: Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn vs. Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon

Perry and Chris come out to Malenko’s music for some reason. We’re told Sting is fine from the BIG DOG ATTACK. Benoit vs. Kanyon gets us going. Chris clears the ring and the partners both get tags. The champs clear the ring again but go after Bigelow to let Team Jersey take over. The champs hit almost stereo belly to belly overheads to get control back and it’s officially Page vs. Benoit now.

Page beats him down and it’s off to Kanyon who goes to the middle rope, puts his leg on Benoit’s head, and drives him down with a Fameasser for two. Back to Page and Benoit gets a single suplex for two. Page tries the Helicopter Bomb but it’s more like a regular one instead. A Kanyon moonsault misses and here’s Saturn. He cleans house and hits a frog splash on Kanyon for two.

Saturn gets beaten down again by some good old fashioned double teaming. He tries a sunset flip but Kanyon makes a blind tag and grabs the head of Saturn, exposing Saturn’s back. Page comes in and decks him to take over. Kanyon was freaking smart in the ring man. The beating continues for awhile but Page misses a dive and crotches himself on the top buckle.

That allows for a double tag to bring in Kanyon and Benoit with the crazy Canadian going cracy on the challengers. Kanyon REALLY loudly calls for a suplex where he lands behind Benoit and he does just that. He gets rammed into Bigelow though and Rolling Germans get two. A dragon suplex gets a VERY close two. Benoit hits the Swan Dive as Saturn kind of falls off the top into a Diamond Cutter. Cue Malenko who pulls Saturn out for some reason. Crossface to Kanyon but here’s Bigelow to help with an elevated Cutter and the Triad wins the titles.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but the rematch where the Triad could trade in and out next month at the Bash at the Beach was a much better match. Still though, this was so far and away a better match than anything else all night that I’d rather watch it a dozen times than anything else here. Not bad, but they’ve had better matches.

We recap Nash vs. Savage. Savage snapped and painted Nash’s face with lipstick and makeup. Then there was the Hummer Driver ordeal and a bunch of mud. The Hummer Driver is here with Savage tonight.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Randy Savage

Savage has three blondes with him: real life girlfriend Gorgeous George, Madusa and Miss Madness (Molly Holly). The big elbow has been unbanned. Well that’s good to know. Nash’s ribs are messed up. The champ (Nash) hammers him down and hooks the side slam but can’t follow up. Savage goes after the ribs and things slow WAY down. Savage was just a name at this point and wasn’t anywhere near his usual self in the ring.

If you weren’t paying attention, this is very dull stuff. It’s just Savage hitting him in the ribs to soften them up for an elbow attempt later. The girls keep cheating, including a missile dropkick from Molly. The elbow hits but it only gets two, mainly because we’re like 3 minutes into the match. Nash comes back with Snake Eyes and the big boot. Jackknife hits and the girls run in but it isn’t a DQ somehow. Then SID FREAKING VICIOUS returns from not being seen in mainstream wrestling in almost two years (he was in ECW for like 2 sips of coffee but I wouldn’t call that mainstream) to beat up Nash for the DQ.

Rating: F. If this was the main event of a show, I’d ask for my money back even if I didn’t pay a dime to get in, which was a common occurrence for a lot of the fans at this time. The Sid run-in was a legit shocker, but getting to that point was just dreadful. I have no idea who thought this was a good idea, but what do I know?

Overall Rating: -F. As in we’ve gone so low that we’ve went past Z into negative letters. This was HORRIBLE and easily one of the worst PPVs I’ve ever seen. Not only did the main event suck, the best match is just ok and ran longer than it needed to. Plus, the dogs man. That ranks right up there with the dumbest things I’ve ever seen in wrestling. Combining that with guys like Van Hammer and Brian Knobbs being on PPV and how in the world could this be anything but horrible?a

 

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