Night of Champions 2009
Date: July 26, 2009
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,774
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

So what we have here is Night of Champions where everything on the roster is for a title. Literally, every match is a title match. I think I like that actually. Sure it’s a gimmick show, but at the same time that’s all you need at times. We’ve got a Mania 24 rematch and Punk vs. Hardy for the respective titles. This has been recently dubbed the 5th big one of the year, so let’s get to it.

The opening video is about as basic as you could imagine as almost everything is about being a champion. Why mess with something that simple? It focuses on the two main matches as you would also expect. Norcal was at this show so expect a few lines about him here and there.

Unified Tag Titles: Legacy vs. Chris Jericho/???

So Edge snapped his ankle and has no partner, meaning anyone that’s paid attention for the past few months knows who this is going to be. We get the video of Edge’s injury saying he’ll come back and take care of Jericho. That’s going to be an awesome feud. And it’s the Big Show. No one got this and the rumor was they picked him seconds before with the video being shown to buy them some more time.

There are cool banners with pictures of the belts hanging from them. It looks sweet. Rhodes and Show start us off. Show just beats the heck out of both guys as you would expect. You could bet on Jerishow retaining here even from the perspective of watching it live. In a nice move, Legacy hits a tandem chop block and clothesline. Not bad at all. Rhodes whispers something into the ear of Jericho but he does it just subtly enough that unless you knew to look for it you wouldn’t notice it. Well done.

Rhodes busts out a nice moonsault to Jericho. He’s underrated in the ring as his offense keeps changing up. The problem with this match becomes apparent quickly: Jericho and Show are the default faces even though they’re supposed to be the heels. We hit insane mode and Show puts down both guys and after a Codebreaker, the Colossal Clutch ends it.

Rating: C+. It was fine. That’s the only thing I can think of to say for this one. It was designed to be a pure squash for the new champions to get them over and that’s exactly what it did. Rather boring match but it served its purpose very well.

We go to the back to CM Punk, and it’s promo time. This is the promo that made CM Punk to a lot of people and I remember wanting to jump up and cheer at it. He talks about how the parents letting their children support Jeff Hardy and his drug addicted lifestyle and how eventually they start doing as Jeff does: smoking, drinking, drugs etc., and it all started because the parents wouldn’t take responsibility for their kids. The fans cheering for everything that he lists off is great as this was the perfect crowd to do this in front of.

ECW Title: Tommy Dreamer vs. Christian

Dreamer in ECW wearing the ECW Title is perfect to say the least. And WWE can’t have that, so they have him come out second and have the king of the smarks Christian come out second so that he gets a much bigger pop than Dreamer who has earned 30 seconds of glory. As you know, Christian wins here, which is also ridiculous as it wouldn’t have killed them to do this at TV.

Seriously, let Dreamer have his moment in ECW in Philly. Striker points out that the ECW Title has changed hands a lot in Philly. Thanks for that. I never would have guessed on that one. I love that running rolling flip that Dreamer does. You can see there’s a fairly big lack of psychology here as they’re just kind of walking through spots with little flow to it at all. We hit a sleeper already which isn’t a good sign.

More or less Dreamer is using nothing but jobber offense and signature spots. To be fair though you could argue that those are one in the same. Dreamer hooks a Texas Cloverleaf of all things. We hit an always fun pinfall reversal sequence. They trade finishing holds that are countered until Christian hits the Killswitch for the pin and the championship.

Rating: D+. While I hate Dreamer losing the belt in Philly, he got about two months with it so I can’t argue much on that. Christian has held the belt since this match. That being said, this just wasn’t that good. Dreamer simply isn’t that good in the ring but if nothing else this was just a nostalgic reign for Dreamer so that’s all well and good.

Ad for Summerslam.

Jerishow say they’re going to dominate. Cookie cutter promo if there has ever been one.

US Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger vs. Carlito vs. The Miz vs. Primo vs. MVP

Swagger does a little dance on the way to the ring. More or less it was a given that someone was going to take the title from Kofi here. I think Carlito’s mustache has its own population. Miz gets a NICE pop. Primo is replacing Big Show who was supposed to be in here. And there are no tags here. That rarely makes things any better or easier to call at all. Hey, did you know Kofi doesn’t have to be pinned to lose his title?

I didn’t know if it was made clear that Kofi doesn’t have to be pinned to lose his title. I want to make it clear that Kofi doesn’t have to be pinned to lose his title. It’s just a massive mess as everyone is trying to get a spot in there where they can. Also there are a lot of guys randomly staying on the floor for long periods of time. They mess up a save spot as Swagger hits Primo for the save about 5 seconds after Miz kicked out.

The Puerto Ricans are exploding here as they don’t like each other even though no one cares at all. Swagger and MVP are having the same angle that MVP and Miz are having now. No one is in the ring at the moment. Kofi’s movement is amazing to say the least and there’s the incredibly named Boom Drop. They do a Tower of Doom spot with Miz taking the most damage.

The crowd is dead here in case you were wondering. Miz is unceremoniously dumped to the floor. Is there a ceremonious way to do that? Everyone gets a quick rollup or pin and it gets some applause if nothing else. In a cool and actual believable spot, Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale at the same time on MVP as he hits the Playmaker on Swagger. Kofi hits Trouble In Paradise on Carlito for the pin and the very surprising retain.

Rating: C-. I hate matches like these, I truly do. They’re just disasters to have one guy get a fluke pin and overcome a bunch of odds when in reality all it does is disguise the fact that there is no story or effort being put in here and it’s just a massive mess. Kofi winning was a nice surprise though.

Randy Orton says he’ll prove himself tonight. He reminds me of Lex Luthor from Smallville.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Michelle McCool vs. Melina

This is a rematch from The Bash which was brought on by some bad acting. Michelle’s bra is sticking WAY out here. Melina gyrates like no one I’ve ever seen. Michelle is the first person to use her freaking brain and kicks Melina on her splits intro. And there’s your first botch as they mess up an arm drag. We get some kicks that don’t actually connect as I have a bad feeling about this match.

We hit the floor and are told that a slam of the face into the barricade is a DDT. Riiiiiiiight. Melina is laying on the apron and in a coole counter she pulls up onto the bottom rope to avoid a baseball slide. They’re hitting hard but at the same time, they’re botching the heck out of so many things. Michelle reverses a rollup into a rollup for the pin. At least it was short.

Rating: D. They were trying but this was just a mess and a half. They were botching stuff left and right with there being little flow or psychology at all. Michelle has gotten better which to be fair she couldn’t have gotten much worse. This was really bad.

What in the heck is the point of McCool’s song? You’re not enough for me? That makes no sense.

Cena is here.

There was a tournament where the winner got Orton at NOC. More or less it was a way to have HHH vs. Cena on free TV and I won’t even go into how stupid that is. Legacy ran in for the double DQ so they made it a triple threat, which had been done before but no one cared. The video was as simple as you could ask for.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. HHH vs. Randy Orton

Cena of course gets a mixed reaction. HHH gets a very face reaction and of course Orton gets a very heel reaction. Vince must already be coming over just the entrances. We’re at 5 minutes for intros and Orton hasn’t come out yet. This could be an all night thing. And now we sit and wait on Orton. I guess Vince wanted a show. They say this was a great Wrestlemania main event.

Not only was it not a main event, but it was far from great. Orton doesn’t have to be pinned or tap out to lose the title. The ridiculousness of triple threats is never lost on me. Big match intros mean that it’s been 13 and a half minutes since the last match ended and the beginning of this. Good to see they’re keeping this thing moving. The faces double up on Orton to keep things moving quickly I guess.

Orton of course winds up in trouble as you would expect. The other thing I hate about these are how formula based they are. Why does one guy always wind up down on the floor only to show up just in time to make a save? I don’t get it at all. Cena does that top rope leg drop to both guys and it more or less completely misses. Philly really doesn’t like Cena at all.

Orton gets put to the floor with another completely ridiculous spot and it’s HHH and Cena again. Hmm I believe I called this coming no? It’s boo/yay time as they oversell punches to no end. Why would anyone duck their head against HHH? How stupid do you really have to be? Cena takes the Pedigree and in a STUNNING, yes STUNNING I say, turn of events, Orton makes the last second save. We’re in the crowd now. Oh never mind only Orton is.

The STFU is on HHH on the table, making it completely pointless. Cena gets the STFU on HHH again but in the ring this time. There’s zero drama at all here as it’s clear the match won’t end here. Cena dodges the punt (even though the kicking motion is more like a place kick) and rolls up Orton for two. That could have been a believable ending actually. Somehow Orton makes the Garvin Stomp more boring. How in the world is that possible?

And now the fans are chanting for Orton. It’s a very interesting sign that Orton is so hated that the fans would rather have Cena as champion again. HHH hooks a Sharpshooter because he’s HHH and can do whatever he wants to I guess. Cena adds a Crossface at the same time and Orton taps.

Let the nonsense begin. Legacy runs in for the beatdown as I wonder why Rhodes can’t wear sleeves. And Orton hits the RKO on Cena for the pin to retain. Yep, after tapping like that he keeps the belt. That’s not stupid at all.

Rating: D+. I hated this. Even Cole has disgust in his voice and I can’t blame him. No one wanted to watch Orton other than Vince so he can stare at his glistening body. Even Philly was cheering for Cena. What does that tell you? This was idiotic to say the least and the match sucked on top of that. Actually let me revise that. The match was ok, but the formula was idiotic. Cena and Orton began their ridiculous feud the next month at Summerslam.

Maryse is stretching for obvious reasons. That and her mustache must equal talent right? Miz hits on her and it fails.

Shaq is guest host tomorrow.

Chilli from TLC is here. No one cares.

Raw Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Maryse

Make it quick please. Yeah as looks go, Mickie is way ahead of Maryse. The fans want puppies. And people wonder why this division is never taken seriously. The match is your standard slapfest of course. Maryse tries to use her perfume or whatever but gets stopped.

We’re in our second rest hold six minutes into the match. This just isn’t interesting at all. Cole almost says the name of the wrong title. There is simply no need to have two belts. If you had just one it could potentially work. Mickie hits her jumping DDT to get the title to next to no reaction.

Rating: D. People don’t care about women’s wrestling and that’s really all there is to it. It’s not nice but it’s true. This just wasn’t interesting at all. The buildup was Mickie has beaten the jobbers this month so she gets the title shot because she’s on a roll. That’s it. I’m looking forward to Michelle vs. Mickie as there’s an actual story to it. This didn’t and it was painfully obvious.

Legacy says they’re cementing their legacy.

We recap Mysterio vs. Ziggler which more or less is Ziggler has been winning a lot but doesn’t get the belt. This is his chance.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

People kept talking about the potential that Dolph had but I’ve just never seen it. These fans seem to think that everything is boring and it’s getting on my nerves very quickly. This is seemingly going to be a rather long match with Ziggler getting to show off. That’s a good sign if nothing else. He’s showing some solid offense and he looks completely calm doing it. Also getting in some little plays to the crowd which is always a nice perk.

This was what the title needed: big names defending it and guys having longer solid matches for it. For years it was the wrestlers’ title and that’s what they tried to make it again which I would say was a success. As expected, Dolph dominates for most of the match but makes one minor mistake, in this case going for one too many moves and here comes the masked man. And then of course the 619 and the springboard splash ends it.

Rating: B. This was very fine indeed. They got to beat on each other for awhile and it did a few things. First of all it let Ziggler look good. He got to show off against a huge star in Mysterio. Second they had a great match that made the belt look good. Both guys came out of this looking great and that’s all you can ask for.

Ad for the tag team DVD which I’m about halfway though and need to finish up.

We recap Punk vs. Hardy, which started at Extreme Rules where Punk used the MITB case to get the belt then slowly turned heel. That led us here.

Smackdown World Title: CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

They really push the whole lifestyle thing here which is the smartest thing that they can do. They’re starting with a fast paced match that’s working rather well. These two had some great matches over the year and this was certainly one of them. Punk is so perfect as a heel and it’s working like a charm here. They’re going with high spots here which is something that Punk can do very well.

This wasn’t going to get a lot of time as it started at about 10:40, so the max was about 20 minutes. Oy it’s that referee with the hitch in his counts. This match felt like it didn’t have a beginning and we’re already at the end which isn’t good really, although the match is fine. We get a Dragon Sleeper of all things. Punk goes into that striking sequence he uses and Hardy ducks before hitting an RKO which is called a Twist of Fate here. Yeah that was dumb.

GTS hits and if the referee wasn’t incompetent, Punk would have won. Punk tries to leave and our hero doesn’t like that. In a rather anti-climactic moment he hits his usual finishing pair of moves and he gets his third world title. The celebration ends the show.

Rating: B-. I do not agree with the booking here at all. I was skeptical about the grade here but Ross saying let the Hardy Party begin sealed it. I don’t get Punk losing at all after the promo from earlier, but that’s life I guess as we can’t send kids home sad or they might only get three t-shirts this year instead of four. Either way this was pretty good although like I said it felt rushed which is because the show was running a bit low on time. I get why they cut it short. Still good though.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a pretty good show but not great. I really didn’t like the triple threat but I’d chalk that one up to a personal bias more than anything else. Other than that, the non-Diva matches were more or less all good which is all you can ask for. There’s nothing that jumps off the page as awesome, but at times you don’t need there to be. This was good enough for a watch but it’s not something you’ll want to see again. Check it out if you’re bored.

It’s Sunday and we have three major matches.

Here are my picks:

HHH vs. Punk

I guess I’ll go with Punk here, likely to set up a rematch inside HIAC which it’s WAY too early in the feud for but the calendar says that it’s time for a Cell match to take place.

Cena vs. Del Rio

I’m going to make this quick since it’s about 2am and thinking about this match puts me to sleep.  Cena because it’s a shorter word to type.  Has there been  a world title match with a worse build in recent memory not in TNA?  I can’t think of one.

Orton vs. Henry

Now THIS is an interesting one.  My money is on Orton to set up one last match in the Cell with Christian which is almost built up properly as a HIAC match.  I don’t have a ton of confidence in that pick though as Henry has been on a roll lately and I could easily see him taking the title.  When the booking points one way (Orton wins) but it could go either way, you have a well set up match which I can’t believe I’m saying about a Henry match but it’s true.

Thoughts on these and/or any other matches?

Smackdown
Date: September 16, 2011
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross, Booker T

It’s the final show before Night of Champions and other than the IC Title I think we’re all set for Sunday. I haven’t heard anything announced for tonight but it almost has to be better than Raw was. Orton vs. Henry will get pushed even more and to their credit I’m kind of interested in seeing how that match plays out, which is something I never would have bet on when it was announced. Let’s get to it.

We open with the return of Edge who gets the monster hometown boy pop. He’s here tonight to host the Cutting Edge with Henry and Orton. Edge talks about missing coming through the curtain and it feels good to be back. It feels better to be back here in his hometown of Smackdown. He misses being in the ring and competing and being in the back with his friends however more than anything he misses the fans.

Edge talks about having the Cutting Edge tonight and he won’t pull any punches. That’s later though. Right now….and here’s Cody to cut him off. Cody says Edge is probably here to talk about Haven which airs tonight on SyFy after Smackdown (Cody’s plug, not mine) but since Edge didn’t do that, it sounds like he’s sucking up to the people. He suggests the fans all need paper bags.

Edge says maybe it’s Cody that needs a bag instead of the people. Maybe it’s Cody that is ugly and disfigured. Cody says the last time he saw Edge he was walking out of Mania as world champion but Cody has become IC Champion since then and has gotten rid of DiBiase. Also he beat Orton on Monday. Cody pulls out a bag for Edge and says to take it home and put it in his office because it’s a reminder that Cody is the new face of Smackdown. Edge hands it back, saying Cody needs it more.

Cody says that makes no sense. Edge says no it doesn’t and neither does the idea that Dusty fathered him. That’s rather true. Edge goes to leave but Cody screams to have the music cut off. Cody FREAKS, shouting about how he’s better than the crowd and he’s going to give the crowd paper bags. “You need a bag. You need a bag. You need two bags.” Then a fan with a bag punches him and takes his bag off to reveal Ted DiBiase. Ted beats him up and beats down the baggers as well. Ted’s music plays as Cody leaves. I guess that’s the IC Title match. Good intensity from Ted.

Sin Cara vs. Daniel Bryan

This is the rematch from a few weeks ago where Cara beat down Bryan post match. Bryan says Cara can be all aggressive tonight and he’ll be fine with it. Bryan charges straight at him with a flying knee and Cara is in trouble early. He tries another charge though and Cara gets a shot in to block the suicide dive. Cara sends him to the floor and Bryan is holding a lot of parts in pain.

After a break we have Cara holding a leg lock on Bryan. A flying headbutt to a standing Bryan gets two. Booker: “You can see the anger in Cara’s eyes.” Cole: “HE’S IN A MASK!” Cole 1, Booker 0. Cara tries another dive but jumps into a knee and here comes Danny. Big kick gets two. They go to the corner and Cara gets him in the tree of woe where he stomps away. I mean he stomps a lot. He stomps so much that it’s a DQ at 5:00 shown of 8:30.

Rating: C. Not their best but this was still pretty good. The idea was that Cara was out to injure him instead of being a competitor which is a good change in his heel turn. Bryan at least has something to do but I’d like him to move on to a feud with someone a bit higher up on the card. Maybe that’s coming though.

Cara keeps up the beating until….Sin Cara comes down for the save. There are two Sin Caras and one leaves, I think the imposter.

Ryder doesn’t think Henry can stand next to Orton without attacking him. Teddy implements another no contact order for the Cutting Edge. Ryder has to go tell them. He leaves and Aksana comes in. She gives Teddy a massage, involving him bending over and saying how good it feels. Trish comes in and says she’s been there before. And that’s it.

AJ vs. Beth Phoenix

Total squash, Glam Slam ends it in 1:15. There’s nothing else to say here. Beth says the time is ticking on Kelly.

Video on Sheamus who is Irish and awesome. This is set to a song which says Too Many Lies but in a slower/more rock style.

Edge and Trish are having a chat about MMA/yoga gloves or something like that. Christian comes up to make it a more Canadian party. Christian has been calling him a lot and Captain Charisma says Edge might have cost him the title. They hug and everything seems cool. He asks Edge to put in a good word with Teddy to get one more match for the title and Edge is like dude, seriously? Edge says Christian is whining again and Christian storms off. Ryder pops up and tells Edge to pass along the messages to Orton and Henry.

Wade Barrett/Christian vs. Justin Gabriel/Sheamus

Barrett has the coat again. Sheamus has new music which is a rockier song. Wait maybe he doesn’t. It sounds different at the beginning but maybe I’m crazy. Sheamus runs them both down pre match with his now usual Irish folk stuff. The former Nexus guys get us going. We talk about Gabriel going bungee jumping as he speeds things up. He tries a springboard move but jumps into a Bossman Slam (Booker: “Big Bubba Rogers!”).

Off to Christian who pounds away on Gabriel and gets a small package and clothesline for two each. Back to Barrett while Cole makes fun of Booker for being a boxing fan. Booker is going to be getting his own WWE.com show soon. Gabriel fires off the kicks but Barreett powers him down again. Sheamus hasn’t been in yet. Christian whips Gabriel back into the heel corner as we take a break.

Back with Gabriel getting beaten down again but grabs an STO on Christian. A double tag brings in Barrett and Sheamus to a big reaction. The Great White (again their terms and not mine) goes up but Christian grabs his foot. That doesn’t work long either as Barrett takes the big shoulder. Christian escapes the Celtic Cross and a Brogue Kick takes Barrett down so that the 450 can end him at 7:05 shown of 10:35.

Rating: C+. This was fine and a nice way to make Sheamus look dominant while not having him really get his hands on Christian yet. That seems like a smaller version of when HHH kept trying to Pedigree Stephanie or when 911 kept wanting to chokeslam Fonzie for you ECW fans out there. Granted it’ll be a much smaller scale.

Sheamus calls Christian into the ring but he bails. Sheamus’ music is the same here so I guess I was hearing things earlier.

Great Khali vs. Heath Slater

I’m really not seeing the One Man Southern Rock Band going anywhere. Much like the Divas earlier, what are you expecting here? Mahal comes out partway through it and speaks whatever language that is and then comes in for the DQ at 1:12.

Khali fights them off but can’t hit the Plunge on Mahal. He beats up Slater instead.

Raw recap eats up about 4-5 minutes.

Evan Bourne vs. R-Truth

Miz and Truth freestyle on the way to the ring. Ok Truth does and Miz shouts YOU SUCK at the right times. They start fast with Truth beating Bourne down pretty easily. Kofi and Miz are on commentary here. Miz makes fun of Kofi wearing a t-shirt and jeans. Kofi gets a good comeback with “You see this championship title right here? Because of this, this is how a champion dresses.” That’s something that needs to be done more often: talk about how the title means you’re the best.

Bourne fires off some kicks and a low hurricanrana which drives Truth’s head into the mat. He sets for Air Bourne but lands on his feet. Truth kicks the leg and hits that jumping downward spiral for the pin at 1:54. That’s a pretty definitive loss for a champion two days before a title match but it makes the challengers look like a real threat. I’ve heard that move is called What’s Up so we’ll go with that.

Time for the Cutting Edge and Edge doesn’t even get a full entrance? Whatsupwitdat? Edge talks about how important Toronto is to him and how he was at Mania 6 and how he won his first title in WWE here in Toronto also. The guests are Henry and Orton so here they are. Remember that while the Cutting Edge is on, there’s no contact allowed or the match is off.

Edge says that’s probably a good thing for Orton to be honest because Henry has been running through people. He asks Orton if Orton believes he can beat Orton. Orton brings up a good point in that Henry has never attacked him when he’s fresh and maybe that’s because Henry knows his best isn’t good enough. Randy doesn’t think he can beat Henry. He knows he can.

Edge says that’s the truth and brings up that Henry has never won a world title and doesn’t know how that’s possible. Getting to a world title means reaching a new level and Edge isn’t sure if Mark can reach that level. Henry says the only reason he’s letting Edge walk out is because Edge is right. He’s seen smaller guys, such as Edge, win countless titles. I thought 30 was a very countable number but that’s just me.

Henry is done smiling and showing personality and is here to take what Orton has. Orton says the match Sunday will sum up Henry’s career: he’ll look good but he’ll be the world’s strongest failure. They stare it down but Edge says to remember the no contact rule. He leaves and Edge says the Cutting Edge is now over.

Orton jumps Henry and gets him down to one knee but Teddy sends out the locker room to break it up. Henry gets in some shots and both guys break free of the others at one point. Orton fights them off (they’re holding him, not attacking him) but runs into the World’s Strongest Slam. Henry adds a splash and make it a pair. He stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This grade is going to fluctuate considering how you look at the show. If you looked at it as a regular show, it was pretty weak. If you looked at it as a go home show, this was pretty solid stuff. I really want to see Orton vs. Henry now because while I have a hunch who will win, I’m really not sure and it could go either way.

On the Raw side, I flat out do not care about Cena vs. Del Rio because they haven’t given me a reason to care. Beth looked dominant, the tag champions are in trouble and I think it’s pretty safe to assume Ted gets the IC Title shot. That’s a pretty good use of two hours so I’ll call this a solid go home show.

Results
Daniel Bryan b. Sin Cara via DQ when Cara wouldn’t let Bryan out of the corner
Beth Phoenix b. AJ – Glam Slam
Sheamus/Justin Gabriel b. Christian/Wade Barrett – 450 to Barrett
Great Khali b. Heath Slater via DQ when Jinder Mahal interfered
R-Truth b. Evan Bourne – What’s Up

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 15, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re back home in Florida now and we’re on the way to Bound For Glory. The BFG Series is over as well and we’re in the Robert Roode Era as the main event (in name only) of BFG is him challenging Angle for the title. The main part of the show tonight though is Sting vs. Flair with Sting’s career being on the line and Flair trying to prevent Sting vs. Hogan from happening. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the BFG Series matches resulting in Roode winning the tournament. Also Hogan helping Angle keep the title.

Here’s Flair to open the show in robe and presumably ring gear underneath it. He wants to talk to Sting and here’s the crazy man. Flair says tonight it’s Icon vs. God. Sting has an old school colorful robe on. The only way Sting can get to Hogan is over Flair’s dead body. Sting says Flair is going to die tonight then. He’s the Stinger and he’s going to do a lot of evil things to Flair. He’s right in Flair’s face and Sting wants it right now. Security comes in to break it up and Flair says Sting got lucky.

Jeff Hardy is here again.

Jeff says he’s taking another step tonight as far as his recovery goes.

Mexican America vs. D-Von/D’Angelo Dinero/Tara/Miss Tessmacher

It’s an 8 person mixed tag. Hernandez vs. D-Von gets us going with Hernandez asking D-Von to come at him. He does just that and down goes SuperMex. Off to Anarquia who gets beaten up by Pope a little bit. Despite having black hair, being a black man, being about 20 years younger and sounding nothing like him, Pope winds up playing Ricky Morton. Maybe he’s a method actor or something.

That doesn’t last long as he takes Hernandez down with a clothesline and a double tag brings in the other guys. The girls haven’t been in legally at all yet. Clothesline/shoulder puts Anarquia down and a neckbreaker gets two. The fans chant USA as the good guys avoid stereo low blows. The chicks chase each other on the floor and the Mexican chicks hit on D-Von’s kids. Instead of cheering them on like a normal dad would, D-Von and Pope aren’t happy. The girls get in a big catfight and the male champs are sent to the floor. Despite being illegal, Tara and Tessmacher hit stereo moves (couldn’t see Tessmacher but Tara hit a chokebomb on Rosita) for the pins at 5:04.

Rating: D+. What a mess this was. The girls never were legal and the second half of the match was a big mess with everyone running around in a big brawl. That’s Russo 101: when all else fails, throw the wrestling out the window and have people do so much at once that you can’t tell what’s really going on. It works on occasion but it didn’t here, not with that many people at once.

Karen yells at Traci about being late and says to cover up her chest. Traci’s jobs tonight is to bring the Knockouts to Karen’s office.

Karen is yelling at the Knockouts and tells Mickie she gets no rematch. I don’t see Winter. There will be three matches over the next three weeks to determine who qualifies for a fatal fourway at BFG for the title. Mickie fights Tessmacher, Tara vs. Madison and tonight Velvet vs. Angelina. They’re called Queen’s Qualifiers because if there’s one thing you know about Russo, it’s that he has a name for EVERYTHING.

Fourtune is in the ring and AJ brings out Roode for his big entrance. AJ sings his praises and Daniels does as well. Him beating AJ on a fluke a few weeks ago is mentioned a few times as Daniels brings it up at every possible chance. He brings it up a third time and everyone laughs it off. Kaz says they’re a family and they’ll have each others’ backs. They all have goals and Kaz is lucky to be able to call Roode his brother and his friend. Time for the big one in Storm. After all the time he’s missed with his family and everything he’s sacrificed, this is the payoff. Storm sounds legit here.

Storm says he’s sorry about Kurt’s luck and here’s the champ. He tries to convince the rest of Fourtune that they’re jealous but no one seems to buy it. Angle calls the title the Impact World Heavyweight Championship. Angle has the ability to make matches now (what is he the fourth person in this company that can do that?) and Roode has to fight the members of Fourtune and tonight it’s Kaz.

Back and Eric is proud of Kurt’s decision.

Velvet Sky vs. Angelina Love

Angelina jumps her during the entrance (the camera was on the wrong end anyway) but Velvet gets something resembling a bulldog to send Angelina to the floor. Back with Angelina getting two off something we don’t see. Sky’s tights now say Let the Pigeons Loose. Oh great. Just what Tazz needs: a thought that it’s catching on. Sunset flip out of the corner gets two for Velvet. Velvet starts her comeback and tells Winter to get up on the apron. Winter clocks Angelina on the head with the belt (Hebner is cool with it) and a DDT (called a BeauDT but screw that) gives Velvet the win at 9:05 counting commercial.

Rating: D. Your usual Knockout mess here and the ending was really stupid. Why wasn’t that a DQ? Because the script didn’t call for it I suppose. Also, why would Angelina want to go fight Winter? Don’t they love each other or something? Also, seriously, the Beau-DT? I hated the Mick-DT but this is even worse.

Hardy comes up to AJ in the back and AJ doesn’t want to hear it. He calls Jeff selfish and says he almost brought down the whole company. Jeff is selfish and people talk bad about TNA because of him. He’s not out there drinking and doing drugs. AJ says there’s never going to be a time or a place for Jeff to be around AJ. Good stuff from Styles here.

Hogan talks to Flair about the match and says he has a Plan B. Sting pops up and wants to hear Plan A.

Crimson is via satellite and talks about how he’s going to make Joe pay. He’s back in two weeks.

Samoa Joe vs. Matt Morgan

This is a submission match because…..because we needed a gimmick match. Joe jumps him in the corner which gives him an advantage for what must have been a good three seconds. Morgan beats him down but has no idea what to do as far as submissions go. He puts on a triangle armbar but Joe escapes. He gets up and pounds Morgan down then throws on kind of an inverted figure four for the tap at 4:30. I know that’s a short recap but there’s nothing else to say at all.

Rating: D. Again, WHAT IS THE POINT OF IT BEING A SUBMISSION MATCH??? Joe can beat Morgan at something that is Joe’s specially. Is this a stunning revelation and a great achievement for him? I don’t get it but Russo is obsessed with throwing gimmick matches out there so we’ll chalk it up to one of his quirks.

Kurt comes in to talk to Kaz again, offering him the next title shot after Roode. Kaz throws him out.

D-Von talks to Hardy and the truth is that Jeff is a Little Jimmy. Oh wait wrong show. The truth is that Jeff is trying to throw everything away. D-Von says get it through his head and be the Jeff Hardy he can be. At the end if Jeff fails again it’s over. Jeff turns to leave and D-Von says he’ll have Jeff’s back if he needs it.

Kazarian vs. Robert Roode

Roode has some new tights which is a good thing as he needs something to set him apart as a singles guy now. They still have the dollar signs on them which doesn’t make much sense as the money hasn’t meant anything in a long time. They start technically and Roode grabs a front facelock. Kaz breaks out of it and tries his spinning legdrop but Roode moves.

Tornado DDT is countered into a northern lights suplex for two by Rob. Roode goes a bit harder now and Kaz is sent to the floor. Back inside he grabs a front facelock of his own but they speed it up a bit moer and Kaz tries the Fade to Black. Roode counters into the Crossface and Kaz hangs on for a bit but has to tap at 6:07.

Rating: C+. Fun little match here and Roode getting clean wins over his stable mates is a good idea to give him some main event credential. A clean win like that over AJ, especially one where he catches him in the crossface in a counter, would do very well for his career. Good stuff here and a nice surprise.

Angle is watching in the back.

During the replay Taz calls the Fade to Black the Kryptonite Krunch. There’s already a move called that and it’s nowhere near the reverse piledriver.

Video about the premiere of Angle’s new movie Warrior which has gotten really good reviews.

Roode and Kaz had a small argument during the break because Kaz wants to be in that position but he says Roode proved he was the right man for the spot and they shake hands. Roode says he wasn’t expecting this match but they respect each other.

Austin Aries says he backs up his talk. It’s now the A Double Division because he’s a level above the A Level. Next week he makes his first defense.

Roode vs. Daniels next week and Mickie vs. Tessmacher.

Also Ray/Lynn vs. Anderson/RVD. Lynn says RVD is gullible and if RVD hadn’t been high he would have caught on. Ray says he’s been beating up RVD for 15 years but now he’s tired of Anderson sticking his nose in other people’s business.

Sting vs. Ric Flair

They start off with their usual Sting vs. Flair stuff with Flair getting frustrated because Sting keeps escaping his stuff. It’s not exactly crisp but they’re an average age of 57. We take a break and come back with Sting hitting a clothesline to send Flair to the floor. Back in Flair gets a low blow and after about two shots to the leg it’s Figure Four time. Sting gets out of it and Flair works on the knee ever more.

Sting makes the superhero comeback and hits a superplex for two. It looked more like 3 but Immortal ran in late so the referee had to stop. Hogan and Abyss come out but Anderson runs out for the save. Hogan slips something to Flair and he KOs Sting for two. Flair throws a weak chop and Sting Hulks Up. Stinger Splash sets up the Scorpion and Flair taps at 15:06. Yes, fifteen minutes.

Rating: D. Well it was bad but the initial reports of this being unwatchable are a stretch to put it mildly. They were out there WAY too long and I’d love to see the raw footage of this to see how bad it was minus editing and the commercial. Flair shouldn’t be taking those kind of bumps, but who said he made sense?

Hogan and Sting stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Sting vs. Flair was pretty bad as most of it was chop/punch/no sell for fifteen minutes but the rest of the show wasn’t horrible. The first hour was pretty weak but the rest of it worked well enough I guess. We have most of the pieces set for BFG and I hope we get more of a concrete card set before the show unlike No Surrender. Not a great show but it’s better than most of their recent stuff.

Results
D-Von/D’Angelo Dinero/Tara/Miss Tessmacher b. Mexican America – Chokebomb to Rosita
Velvet Sky b. Angelina Love – DDT
Samoa Joe b. Matt Morgan – Inverted Figure Four
Robert Roode b. Kazarian – Crossface
Sting b. Ric Flair – Scorpion Deathlock

This isn’t a show I’ll be reviewing because it’s more like a reality show, but the idea is that Hogan is coming to save a midget wrestling company.  It airs Wednesdays on TruTV and has it’s debut tonight.  I’ve watched 15 minutes of it and it’s one of the funniest, worst written shows I’ve ever seen.  It’s firmly in the category of so over the top and so bad that it’s great.  Check this show out as you’ll die laughing if you think about it for about 10 seconds.

Rebellion 2001
Date: November 3, 2001
Location: M.E.N. Arena, Manchester, England
Attendance: 15,612
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

I continue my war on Europe here with the next to last European PPV, Rebellion 2001. This is at the very tail end of the Alliance era so the main event is Austin vs. Rock for the title. Well you can’t say they’re giving us a weak main event. This card actually looks great on paper, but I’ve been fooled by stuff like that before. That being said, let’s get to it.

The opening video is of course about Austin vs. Rock. Could it be about anything else? A lot of the audio clips are from the Mania buildup also which is fine. Ross doesn’t exactly seem huge on being here tonight. There’s a WCW Title match tonight with Angle, who just joined the Alliance, challenging Jericho.

Intercontinental Title: Christian vs. Edge

This is in a cage. Well you can’t say they’re starting slowly here. Christian is European Champion here and Edge is IC Champion. Christian won his title the Tuesday before this in America. In other words, the Canadian won the European Title in America but isn’t defending the European Title in Europe against a Canadian but will when he gets back to America. Well it was the WORLD Wrestling Federation.

They’re still brothers at this point. Christian tries to run early on which gets him nowhere. Why couldn’t this be on that Inside the Steel Cage thing I watched recently? Edge misses a spear and his shoulder hits the post. It’s pin, submission or escape here. Back breaker gets two for Christian. It’s weird seeing him in the shirt and with long hair still.

Ross says Edge has spent more time on the canvas than Rembrandt. The match has been going on less than five minutes and he’s already busting out the metaphors. Christian almost gets out but Edge makes the DIVING, yes DIVING I say, save. Almost all Christian here. And of course as I say that Edge gets a release Gordbuster from the middle rope and a cross body for two.

And we hit the chinlock for awhile now. Ross: we would never be argumentative. Paul: I disagree with that. Funny stuff. Another good one: Ross: you never praised Christian this much before he joined the Alliance. Paul: we weren’t paying him then. These two are awesome together. Edge gets a spear out of NOWHERE to put Christian down but he can’t capitalize.

Edgecution gets two. I still like that better as a finisher than the Spear. Edge-O-Matic gets less than three as well. They slug it out and Christian eats cage. Christian gets one leg over the top and that’s about it. In a very fun ending, Christian gets most of the way out as in he needs to drop to get out.

Edge grabs his boots and crotches him against the cage. He takes the tape off his wrists and ties Christian’s boots together and climbs out to win it. That was a nice little ending and it worked much better than most of the other generic endings you usually get. Also nice to see an escape rather than a stupid pin or something.

Rating: C. Pretty basic stuff here but the crowd was into it and things went pretty well here, especially considering it’s not like this is anything special outside of a big house show. The ending really helped it out a lot. A good ending like that can work wonders for something like this and it certainly did here.

We recap Angle joining the Alliance which wound up being a ploy by Vince to make the WWF Team win at Survivor Series.

Chavo is interviewing the Divas tonight. Bill DeMott comes up and says that HE is doing that tonight. These two were fired from the Alliance and were doing some weird fired angle that went nowhere. They’ll do the interviews tonight apparently. Trish has no shirt on and they get all nervous. She suggests they talk to Lita. More on this later I guess. Great.

Scotty 2 Hotty vs. The Hurricane

Heyman’s intro for Hurricane is great stuff. Basic stuff to start so far with nothing really going on early on. Hurricane (Gregory/Shane Helms) is in the Alliance here. This is just going nowhere at all. The bulldog to set up the Worm is blocked. Crowd is more or less dead here. Helms gets a Blockbuster for two.

We get what’s called a Ne-Han in No Mercy from the Hurricane. You cross the other guy’s arms in an X shape and pull back on them like a camel clutch. And then Hurricane lets it go to put on his cape. And so much for that as Scotty gets a DDT and both guys are down. and both guys are down. Kick by Scotty gets two.

Hurricane does a Worm of his own which doesn’t work. Chokeslam gets two. A rollup with ropes gets two. Eye of the Hurricane is blocked into the bulldog and there’s the Worm. I hate that move. Since it’s a chop to the neck after the other guy has forever to get better, it gets the in.

Rating: D. This match sucked. It was just boring on all accounts and the fans could tell. This should have been a dark match so of course they let it go on the actual show. Scotty was over for absolutely no apparent reason. This went nowhere at all and was boring beyond belief. Also, the freaking Worm got the pin. Get on to something else.

Trish tries to get the fired dudes the interview with Lita. She’s in her underwear and looks VERY good in her yellow thong. She throws them out.

DDP is the way too happy guy at this point. He thinks England is way too depressed. Sweet goodness Vince never got this guy at all.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Big Show

Make this quick. The only good thing about their match at Starrcade was the ending. It has to be better here right? Also get Page his Nirvana knockoff song. Show is in the one piece swimsuit here. Show goes straight at him and Page is in trouble. Heyman wants to know why Show doesn’t pick on someone his own size. That would be because there is no one his own size according to JR.

Ross talks about Show’s weight in stones. Heyman says at least as much as Richards and Jagger combined. The commentary has been awesome tonight. DDP goes for the leg to take him down for a change. He gets kind of a jumping fist off the top which is supposed to be a clothesline. Figure four is blocked by Show. Chokeslam is blocked into the Diamond Cutter for no cover because Page is down but eventually gets two. Chokeslam ends it soon thereafter.

Rating: N/A. Boring match that was more or less a squash. When the Diamond Cutter gets two, you know DDP is dead. This went nowhere at all for the most part and at least it was short.

Post match Page says that wasn’t a bad thing but rather a good thing because now he gets to leave England.

The fired dudes go in and Molly has no mask but is in her superhero outfit. She’s mad that they saw her without her cape. These segments suck and hard.

Shane is talking to Austin, Angle and Debra. They shouldn’t be worried about Survivor Series bur rather tonight. The table they’re at is round and you know the lines Angle is going to use. Shane is Merlin. When Angle got way into stuff he was hilarious.

WCW Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boyz vs. APA

The Dudleyz have the belts here. And remember, D-Von is the weak one. This is under elimination rules. No Stacy here with the Dudleys which is a shame as she looked awesome in those camo shorts. The Hardys were on the verge of having some problems. Bubba vs. Matt starts us off. Ok so there is more or less ZERO reason for the APA to tag in to start right?

Bubba looks odd for some reason. I think it’s the lack of wrist tape. Bradshaw in now vs. Matt. The fans boo which they claim is due to Matt getting beaten down but I’m not so sure on that one. Are you sure it’s not due to the show kind of sucking? The APA beats up Jeff as the fans want tables. It should be noted that one of the six guys here ever wrestled in WCW and he’s also the one that has most recently appeared on WWE Television.

They’re just killing time here to get one of the teams, likely the APA, out. Fallaway Slam to D-Von from the middle rope gets no cover. The Hardys go to the floor for a bit leaving Farooq in trouble. They run in just in time to hit a Twist of Fate on Farrooq to end him and get us down to the predictable tag match.

D-Von gets out some tables to a huge face pop. Jeff gets a nice baseball slide to take him out as the table is driven into his face. It turns into the basic match between these two which while ok isn’t anything special. They talk about Lennox Lewis fighting D-Von or something like that. Heyman really likes talking about the Dudleys and their resume.

Now we’ll talk about Angle vs. Jericho as there is nothing that hasn’t been said about these teams already I suppose. Jeff crotches Bubba on the top and gets a rana for two. D-Von and Matt both come in with Matt naturally taking control. Poetry in Motion to Bubba and then to D-Von. The Swanton misses D-Von though and Matt walks into a bad 3D to retain.

Rating: D+. And so what? I mean seriously, who cares at this point? These teams feuded for so long and so many times that it got boring beyond belief to watch them fight again and again. I think the Dudleys beat them in a cage match at Survivor Series which was the final match between them. APA had no business being there so they were there anyway. Nothing special here at all.

Don’t try this at home. Try it away from home though.

Heyman is in Dudley glasses.

We see some stuff of Jericho accidentally hitting Rock which cost them a tag match. It’s not like this match is happening anytime soon or that they’re fighting tonight. We’re just trying to waste some time.

Vince is talking to Jericho and Rock is apparently on the other side of him. He wants them to bury the hatchet so they can beat the Alliance. They need to get along tonight. Why do they need to get along tonight? Who cares I guess, but Vince orders it so be it. They shake hands and Jericho says try not to lose another big one. Rock says he has something Jericho can take to the ring with him and drills him before a bunch of suits break it up.

Tajiri vs. William Regal

Before we get started Regal says he’s their role model. He makes fun of David Beckham and Man U. Tajiri is Cruiserweight Champion at this point. DANG Tajiri could throw some kicks. Regal gets into a grappling match where of course he’s going to dominate. This isn’t much more than a midcard match but at least they had been feuding recently so this makes sense. Regal gets a modified Tazmission more or less on Tajiri who comes back anyway.

Something tells me this isn’t going to last long. Tajiri gets crotched on the top rope as Regal keeps control. He chops the living heck  out of Regal as the fans aren’t exactly thrilled by this. Missile dropkick gets two. Handspring elbow hits to pop the crowd a bit. Tarantula hooks Regal and Tajiri goes up for the moonsault and crashes. Regal Stretch ends it immediately afterwards.

Rating: D+. Nothing special at all here with Tajiri having maybe a minute of offense total. This was more filler which they’ve been spacing apart pretty badly so far tonight. This went nowhere as did the feud due to the whole Alliance thing dying off soon after this. They were better as a comedy tag team.

Tajiri spits mist in his face post match.

Angle runs down British fans and makes fun of the name Y2J. This involves singing the Mickey Mouse Club song.

WCW World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kurt Angle

Well this should be awesome. That big old WCW belt looks great on Jericho. Angle is the US Champion apparently. It’s still the old belt design which I actually like less than the current one which isn’t typical for me. They hit the mat almost immediately with Jericho throwing punches and forearms, making this almost like an MMA fight, at least in spirit.

Spinwheel kick takes down Angle for no cover. Three Amigos hit before they have a name. Walls can’t hook on so Jericho hits the springboard dropkick to send Angle to the floor. Jericho follows and chops the heck out of Angle. Back in the ring and Angle almost gets the ankle lock. Angle’s shoulder eats post. Well not really as there’s no opening there or anything but you get the concept.

Angle gets the momentum and starts busting out the suplexes. He goes for the Walls as we begin the countdown to Jericho hooking the ankle lock on him. Angle can’t get it anyway so it’s not like it really matters. We hit the chinlock as the fans are WAY behind Jericho here. How un-American they are indeed. Jericho gets a rolling cradle for two.

And then back to the chinlock as they’re kind of wasting time here. Enziguri counters the ankle lock and everyone other than the referee is down. Jericho cranks it up a bit and gets a rana for two. Yep I was right. Jericho rolls through a victory roll and grabs the ankle lock. A rope is grabbed shortly thereafter anyway so it’s not like it meant anything. Rolling Germans have Jericho in trouble.

There’s the real ankle lock but Jericho counters into the Walls. Lionsault eats knees though and it’s Angle Slam time. So much for that though as Angle gets rolled up for the pin and Jericho retains. How often do you see a clean finish between these two? I can’t think of one with about as limited thinking as possible.

Rating: B-. Nothing that special here but it was ok for the most part. These two always work well together for the most part and they had a decent match here. I still don’t like the way it sounds when they say this was for the WCW Title as that always sounded really odd. Decent match but they’ve had better.

Angle beats up Jericho after the match.

Cole asks how Rock can focus on Jericho. Rock calls him a great journalists. Thank goodness he doesn’t remember that line. And so much for that as Rock implies that Cole is gay. To be fair he says it doesn’t matter. Solid Rock promo here as always and dare I say, vintage?

Mighty Molly/Stacy Keibler vs. Lita/Torrie Wilson

Trish is referee here due to reasons of hotness. It says a lot when Molly is the least attractive person in a match. Stacy in camo top and leather skirt works to put it mildly. Heyman says he and Lita wear the same style of underwear. Oh dear. Stacy and Torrie start us off. This is more or less about what you would expect. Trish can’t do much in the ring yet so Lita and Molly are going to be carrying this one.

Apparently over 50,000 tickets were sold in an hour for Mania 18. Molly comes in as we’re waiting for Lita to come in and clean house. Stacy does the leg choke to a pop. Lita gets knocked down and the heels double team for a bit. Make your own orgy jokes. Molly does what she can but Torrie is kind of uncarryable. There’s Lita and it’s over in less than a minute with the Twist of Fate to Molly.

Rating: D. The match sucked but the girls looked good. That’s all there is to this and that’s all there was ever going to be on this.

Post match Trish hits Stacy with a horrible bulldog.

We recap Rock vs. Austin which is more or less billed as a Mania rematch which isn’t true but whatever. It’s more Alliance vs. WWF stuff in short. One thing I never got: Austin says he’s leaving the WWF to find better competition. If he’s fighting WWF guys isn’t he fighting the same competition he’s always been fighting? They clip a good portion of this from the Mania package.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Not a bad main event I wouldn’t think. Austin jumps Rock as he’s posing on the ropes. You don’t interrupt the Rock’s posing! Rock chops away and hits a swinging neckbreaker before the vest comes off the champion. Rock Bottom doesn’t hit as Austin goes over the top. On the floor now and water is spit into Austin’s face.

They fight up the ramp and you can’t see a freaking thing. Ah there’s a spotlight. Much better. Rock reverses a suplex on the stage and Austin bounces off the steel. Austin wants a Piledriver but he winds up bouncing off the stage again. Back towards the ring now and it’s still mostly Rock. That is until he takes a slingshot and bounces head first off the post.

Austin flips off the crowd and almost gets caught in a rollup. It only gets two though and right back onto offense for Austin. They head to the floor even more and onto the announce table. Rock blocks another Piledriver and gets off. WHAT IS THE FREAKING DEAL WITH THE AIRHORNS? Do you British people think those are cool or something? Knock it off!

They’ve been in the ring about two minutes out of maybe ten. Austin chokes him with the cables and then they chop it out. He drops Rock on the table again and might have hurt his knee. Back in the ring for a change and Austin lands the Thesz Press. The screw you elbow gets two as there’s a good deal of time left in this. Austin wastes time by yelling at the crowd and Rock comes back with some of Austin’s stuff, including the elbow for two.

We get a sleeper by the bald one. Doesn’t it amaze you that the rear naked choke takes like a few seconds to get a submission but a sleeper can last like a minute and the guy is fine? Naturally Rock’s arm goes up at the third drop like the hero that he is. Naturally Rock gets a sleeper on Austin because that’s just how things work. Also just how things work, his lasts like four seconds.

Austin gets a Boston Crab for no apparent reason. It’s more like a Liontamer than anything else which makes it more awesome. The look on Austin’s face is downright creepy looking. Rock gets about his 9th wind and takes over again with a belly to belly for two. And there goes the referee of course. Stunner is blocked and Austin walks into a spinebuster and the Sharpshooter which doesn’t make Austin tap but there’s no referee.

Austin puts Rock in the Sharpshooter on Rock and it’s somehow better than Rock’s. Ok scratch that it sucks. And now Rock has it on Austin until Angle runs down and pops Rock with the chair. Cue Jericho who I’ll bet is going to hit Rock with the chair. Jericho gets Angle out and Rock sees him with the chair, thinking it was him that popped him with it. And there they go.

Rock Bottom hits Austin and there’s still no referee. Angle is back in now and takes care of Rock again. DANG that referee can stay down through a lot. That didn’t last long as another spinebuster takes Austin down again. Angle breaks up the elbow with a belt shot though and a Stunner keeps the title on Austin.

Rating: B. These two have great matches time after time and this wasn’t their best but still was solid. This felt like a major match like it was supposed to be and that’s really all you can ask for at a show like this. Pretty good match and long with over twenty minutes. This was solid enough stuff but the ton of run-ins and the long ref bump kind of hurt it. Solid main event.

Overall Rating: C+. This was better than most of these shows but still nothing great. There is some solid stuff here but the problem is that it’s all been done before and been done far better than it was here. I’m not a fan of these shows at all as they never are much of anything but this was better than the majority of them. Nothing really worth seeing specifically but I’ve seen far worse shows. This was ok.

It can be anything from a match to a segment to a line to a sketch.  There’s no real limit here.  Just your favorite moment.

My pick:

Foley wins the WWF Title over Rock.  This was an incredibly uplifting moment as Foley, the guy who had worked his entire life to get to this moment FINALLY (see what I did there?) after 12 years of hard work.  He paid his dues and worked his way up and was rewarded with the world title of the top company.  That’s such a cool moment and the line of “Mick Foley has achieved his dream and the dream of everyone else who has been told you can’t do it” is the perfect line by Cole.  It still makes me smile.

As the title says I put in the link to the site’s FB page.  I only have it to advertise a bit and you can’t comment on there anyway as it makes it easier for me to see comments if they’re posted here.  Please take a second to like my page so I can get my name out there a bit more.  I’d appreciate it.  You can like individual reviews if you want also.  I’d appreciate it if you would.

KB

NXT
Date: September 13, 2011
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: William Regal, Jack Korpela

With this episode, we’re officially as long as seasons one and two combined and longer than three and four combined. I mean dude, really? Do we really need 28 weeks of this show? I know I say this a lot but I’m still waiting on any reason for this thing to keep going on. The stories aren’t bad but they’re pretty low level issues. I’d bet on Striker/Regal vs. JTG/Young either tonight or next week. Let’s get to it.

Regal and Striker open the show talking about hockey in Canada and here are Young and JTG to break it up. “Hockey isn’t even a real sport.” Striker: “I will cross check you in the head.” The audio is a bit messed up and it sounds like they’re in a tunnel. Striker says Regal is better than both of them and Regal wants a translation of what JTG just said. They talk about respect and just get to the tag match already. After about four minutes, there it is. Regal says he is STRAIGHT UP GANGSTA TRIPPIN! He puts on JTG’s hat and we have our price of admission right there.

Bateman and Kidd vs. O’Neil and a mystery partner up next. Gee, could it be the guy Kidd has been feuding with for two months?

Derrick Bateman/Tyson Kidd vs. Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson

….oh joy. They’re bringing back SOMEONE ELSE now. Also Titus has his own music now. I don’t get the Watson idea though. I mean….why? He has no connection to this match or this feud but here he is on NXT. I’m trying to come up with people they haven’t brought back yet and no one is coming to me. Korpela says Watson used to play in the NFL. He hits an enziguri to Kidd for two. Bateman distracts Percy and the heels take over.

Bateman, called a big man, hits a dropkick off the apron to put Watson down again. They work him over in the ring with Kidd working a front facelock. Jack wants to know where Horny is. He’d be the last Pro to leave so it would fit perfectly. Off to Bateman with a one armed camel clutch. I guess that’s the one hump version. Tag to Kidd who hits a dropkick to Percy while he’s in the double hump version.

Percy snaps off a really high dropkick to put Kidd down. Regal forgets his name but the hot tag to Titus makes it a moot point anyway. He cleans house and runs over Bateman a few times. A slam gets two as Tyson comes off the top with an elbow to the back of the head. Bateman gets two off that but walks into the Clash of the Titus for the pin at 7:06. I’ve said it time after time but just put Titus on the main roster already, because remember that if/when he wins this, he has to go through Season 6 and compete against guys like Tyler Black which puts him at an unfair disadvantage.

Rating: C-. Pretty basic match here but it’s getting hard to keep coming up with reasons for these matches to take place. Again, what is Watson’s connection to this? Why would Titus pick him as a partner? I know he’s been on Superstars a bit but if he can just call up anyone, why not someone like Tatsu who has been against Kidd and has experience with him? I don’t get this show most of the time. The match was just ok.

AJ can’t get ahold of Horny and is tired of talking to his voicemail. She’s worried about him. Maxine comes up and she asks where is he. Maxine suggests he went to Palm Springs with the Bellas. If that winds up being true, I might die of happiness. She has a picture on her phone and AJ doesn’t believe it. This is kind of awesome actually. AJ leaves and Maxine says Photoshop is great.

AJ vs. Maxine

Maxine does look better as a blonde. Regal tells us that Maxine’s father is a master cobbler and an amateur ventriloquist. That’s either a completely true story or Regal is a genius. Now he’s telling a story about a pair of conjoined twins he dated that drove to England on vacation from America. I’m cracking up at his delivery. Maxine works on a chinlock/choke and Regal wants her to be ex-wife #17 but she’s too good looking for him.

All Maxine so far as Regal asks if the beautiful Divas worry about getting kicked in the face. It doesn’t matter to him because he looked pretty with a broken nose. AJ is very flexible and I can’t say I’m complaining. A spinning middle rope cross body gets two. She catches a kick from Maxine and hits a spinewheel kick for two. Maxine puts her in a fireman’s carry and drops her across the top rope before hitting a jawbreaker kind of move for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: D+. The match sucked but the commentary makes up for some of it here. Regal is absolutely priceless on a show like this where he isn’t being listened to or yelled at and can say whatever he wants and get away with it. The commentators are a lot funnier than they’re given credit for. Listen to shows like this or the old PPVs from England and you’ll hear totally different people than you’re used to.

William Regal/Matt Striker vs. Darren Young/JTG

It’s about 10:35 when this starts so they have a lot of time. Oh my goodness Michael Cole is coming out for commentary. Regal vs. JTG to start. The fans are behind Regal and we get an old school criss-cross. Like any good face, Regal stops and cheers JTG on then throws him over the top. Young is put in Shattered Dreams position and Regal/Striker pick JTG up and battering ram him into the balls of Young. That takes us to a break.

Back with Cole calling Korpela Jim instead of Jack. He bashes the main event and Regal gets an awesome bridge to get out of a top wristlock. Cole is blasting both teams other than Regal so at least he’s not playing complete favorites. He has literally not shut up since we came back from the break. You have to give him this: the guy has energy and doesn’t phone it in.

Striker gets beaten down by JTG as Cole runs down WWE for paying for Striker and Korpela to fly from show to show. He does however slip up and mention that McMahon is still in charge. Cole has still not shut up and is now talking about breakfast expenses run up by Korpela and Striker. I’m dying listening to this. Korpela tries to talk about the match and the story behind it but Cole is on a roll.

Cole says people on the street are talking about Darren Young. If they’re on the street how do they get internet access to watch the show? It’s been all JTG/Young beating on Striker since the break if you care about the match. If you do I’d recommend a head examination but have it your way. Cole is going on about hockey and how much the Maple Leafs suck now and it’s hot tag to Regal. Everything breaks down as Regal and JTG head to the floor. This isn’t good for Striker as he can’t beat Young. Now Cole is going off about Striker’s tan and Young rolls up Striker into that fireman’s carry gutbuster for the pin at 11:05.

Rating: C. Again, the match was totally unimportant but I was dying of laughter listening to Cole. He had such passion out there and went on so many rants that he won me over. The match itself was just there like any other NXT main event. If you have the chance and are bored, check this out for Cole’s commentary. I really found it funny and it’s not like this is a title match on Raw where it actually matters, so I don’t have as much of an issue with it.

Post match the Usos of all people come out to beat down JTG and Young. No reason, no explanation, they’re just there. That ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. I don’t know if it’s because I’m tired and a bit sore, but I had a great time with this show. If you forget the NXT competition and the fact that this has been going on for about six and a half months now, this is one of the most enjoyable shows you can find.

It’s a combination of people not caring because they know no one is watching and basic stories that are working (to as much of a degree as they can on this show) and it’s starting to work. It’s kind of like a lower level territorial indy company like an old OVW that is working week to week with whatever talent they can get their hands on and it’s actually starting to work. God help me it’s starting to work.

Results
Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson b. Tyson Kidd/Derrick Bateman – Clash of the Titus to Bateman
Maxine b. AJ – Jawbreaker
JTG/Darren Young b. William Regal/Matt Striker – Fireman’s carry into a gutbuster to Striker

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 12, 2011
Location: Scotiabank Place, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

It’s the go home show for Night of Champions and we still have no midcard title matches. The show should be interesting but I’m not wild on them giving us HHH vs. Punk already. Anyway tonight we’re in Canada or Bizarro Land as WWE likes to call it. According to Del Rio on a radio show Bret will be there and there’s nothing wrong with bringing him in for a Canada show. Let’s get to it.

Alberto is in the ring to open the show and he talks about not getting respect. He lists off some accomplishments such as retiring Edge, injuring Rey and beating Punk at Summerslam. He wants respect and here’s Bret. He talks about how you get respect and how Del Rio is all flash and talk. Bret is stumbling over lines and misspeaking. He’s got his glasses on so he might be a bit drunk. Del Rio says Breth is old and looks like an illegal Canadian that cleans his house.

Del Rio threatens him with violence and here’s Cena. Cena says he sees a Hall of Famer. He talks about how Del Rio has run from Cena for weeks now and says he should drive back to Mexico. Cena gets in a good line, listing off features of the cars (Cena being a known car guy) and saying Del Rio has no idea what he’s talking about. He says let’s fight right now and Del Rio agrees. Cena is STUNNED, but Del Rio means Cena vs. Ricardo Cena says the crowd noise makes him have ideas and the crowd actually cheers him. He suggests Alberto vs. Bret for the title tonight. Bret takes off the jacket and glasses and the fans erupt.

And never mind as Johnny Ace comes out and makes a tag match instead.

Alex Riley/John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

Only Morrison gets the tail end of an entrance here. That’s a good way to save some time. Morrison and Ziggy start us off with Morrison taking over, hitting a huge Beautiful Disaster (yes I know that’s what Cody calls it but it’s the same move) and Ziggler sells it perfectly. Morrison misses a charge into the corner and his arm hits the post. Big elbow drop gets two for Dolph.

A double tag brings in Riley and Swagger with Riley hitting a worse than usual spinebuster. He clears house and hits an STO on Swagger for two. He needs to stick with the DDT and tries one on Swagger but is countered into the ankle lock. Riley rolls through it to send Swagger into Ziggler. A TKO ends Swagger at 2:50 with Ziggler not breaking up the pin despite there being no one to stop him. Ziggler yells at Vickie post match, calling Swagger a loser.

Miz and Truth take a walk with a mic and says just getting a tag match isn’t enough to calm them down. Miz does the talking and runs down the talking segment with HH and Punk later. Truth says he thinks HHH has made a good decision. Miz: “Really?” Truth: “Ninja please!” Miz: “What did you just say?” Truth: “I said Ninja WAZZAH please”. That was one of the funniest lines I’ve heard in a long time.

They come into the arena minus music (nice touch of realism) and Truth says HHH is COO. If you say that twice you get Cuckoo, and that’s what HHH is. The two of them should be in the main event of every PPV and they’ll prove it right now.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

This is after a break. Kofi does his thing and speeds it up to start. They exchange leapfrogs and go to the floor in a heap. Bourne and Truth glare at each other as we take a break. Back with Miz holding a chinlock until he shifts to ram Kofi’s head into the mat for what looked like three but was called two. They seem off for some reason. Kofi hits a jumping double stomp and both guys are down.

This match is a mess and I can’t get into it at all. Kofi starts his comeback and misses the kick but Truth gets involved anyway. He trips Kofi a bit and Miz is able to hit the Finale (screw writing out the whole title even though it would have been shorter than this part I’m writing here) for the pin at 8:39 total.

Rating: D. I know this is probably low and I won’t defend it that much but dang man I couldn’t get into this. There was nothing here that made me want to watch the match and I was terribly bored by it. They were a step off the whole way through and it didn’t work for me. I could see some people liking it though.

Teddy tells Vickie that the tag match earlier will be a fatal fourway for the US Title Sunday and Vickie freaks. Kelly is allegedly looking at them so Vickie yells at her. Vickie says she could beat Kelly. You know the rest.

We get a clip of Lawler/Ryder beating Otunga/McGillicutty last week. Tonight it’s a rematch and Lawler has a mystery partner. They’re in the ring and run their mouths a bit about how awesome they are. Lawler says McGillicutty has nothing on his daddy and Otunga failed his charisma classes at Harvard. Here’s the partner.

Jerry Lawler/Sheamus vs. David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty

Gee Lawler got over Sheamus kicking his head off in MSG a few years back. Lawler starts with Otunga but off to McMynameshouldbeJoeHennig quickly. If you can’t figure out what’s happening in this, too bad because I’m not feeling the review for it. Sheamus, Brogue Kick, Celtic Cross, McGillicutty, 2:30. The former champs were on offense about 20 seconds and I think you can fill in the blanks yourselves.

Ricardo is doing push-ups when Del Rio comes in to yell at him. He drinks….an aphrodisiac….and goes back to push-ups. Weird.

Bret Hart/John Cena vs. Alberto Del Rio/Ricardo Rodriguez

Cena and Ricardo start us off and John plays matador with his shirt. I prefer Tito. The match is exactly what you would expect: Del Rio runs away while Cena destroys Ricardo. Del Rio comes in for a bit and doesn’t stay in long. Alberto finally leaves and after Cena leaves him laying, Bret hooks a Sharpshooter for the submission at 3:15. Total comedy match.

Rating: C. What were you expecting here? I won’t call this a failure because the point of this was to let the fans see their hero and see him put the Sharpshooter on someone for an easy submission. There’s not a thing wrong with that at all and that worked fine. However the lack of anything resembling a build for Cena vs. Del Rio has me not caring even more. Fine for what it was.

Video on 9/11 and Smackdown airing two days later. That was indeed cool. Cena is narrating this.

Kelly Kelly vs. Vickie Guerrero

Kelly embarrasses her for a bit and then Jack comes down after Dolph. They get into an argument and Kelly rolls up a distracted Vickie at 1:20.

This show has been….what’s the right word…..REALLY BORING.

Video on HHH. He’s back in the ring on Sunday. I never would have gotten that guys.

Mark Henry says he’ll be champion Sunday and he wants to be.

Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes

Cody pounds Randy down into the corner and that doesn’t go all that well for him. Henry comes out so Orton grabs a chair and starts walking up the ramp, making Henry leave. Rhodes tries to jump him and that doesn’t go well at all. Orton stomps him down in the corner and beats up Rhodes a bit. Henry comes back with a chair of his own and sits down on the stage.

Orton goes up after him but is unarmed as the chair he had was dropped between the ring and stage. He goes back to Rhodes instead and walks into a Beautiful Disaster off the apron as we take a break. Back with Rhodes holding a crossface chicken wing and working on the arm. There’s a fan in the crowd with an old school IC Belt. Henry moves the chair closer to the ring. Rhodes escapes the elevated DDT but Orton escapes CrossRhodes and hits the DDT anyway. It’s RKO time and Henry gets up and onto the steps, distracting Orton enough for a mask shot. CrossRhodes ends this at 10:24. Expect a rubber match Friday.

Rating: C. Not as good as Friday but not bad. Henry distracting Orton was good as he’s getting into his head and making him lose. Rhodes getting exposure like this is a good thing and the pin not being clean means nothing for the most part, at least to me. Not much here but for the main event this was ok, especially on a throwaway show like this one.

Henry hits him with a chair post match and yells a lot.

We get a quick recap of last week with HHH and Nash imploding.

Here are HHH and Punk for the final encounter. They talk about how Punk is held down because of the bodybuilder fetish and HHH retorts with Shawn Michaels, Mick Foley and someone else that I don’t remember. Punk says the company doesn’t listen to the fans which HHH disagrees with. Punk talks about the fans cheering for him at MSG and then nothing happened.

HHH runs down Punk’s resume and says those sound like opportunities to him. He’s got a great point there. HHH references the Cena story Punk told a few weeks ago and talks about Cena being the biggest star in this business by winning the fans over. He’s absolutely right. HHH talks about how it’s all about the fans and Punk cuts him off, saying they’re cheering for me. HHH gets in the reality though: where have those fans been the last six years?

HHH goes on a huge rant about how Punk has a different philosophy and he’s wrong. He goes on a better rant about how this is personal and not business because Punk made it personal. Punk says this is about change and this isn’t Punk talking to HHH. It’s Phil Brooks talking to Paul Levesque. The mic cuts out on Punk but then it comes on for HHH. It goes off again for Punk and Punk freaks.

HHH doesn’t get what’s going on and gets another mic. HHH hands it to Punk and it goes upside his head. Punk leaves him laying to end the show. The intensity from HHH was great here and he leaves Punk saying something like “well yeah I haven’t drawn ever and I was given a bunch of chances and I never really got them to work except this one but I’m still the best because I say so.”

Overall Rating: D. This was one of the least interesting Raws I’ve seen in years. There were long stretches where I was barely paying attention to the show. Point blank, that NEVER happens with me. I get that Monday Night Football is back but could they have something resembling effort? I have no idea who Cody is facing, I have zero desire to see Cena vs. Del Rio and Punk vs. HHH didn’t need more of a build. Bad show this week and in a boring way.

Results
Alex Riley/John Morrison b. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger – TKO to Swagger
The Miz b. Kofi Kingston – Skull Crushing Finale
Sheamus/Jerry Lawler b. David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty – Celtic Cross to McGillicutty
John Cena/Bret Hart b. Ricardo Rodriguez/Alberto Del Rio – Sharpshooter to Rodriguez
Kelly Kelly b. Vickie Guerrero – Rollup
Cody Rhodes b. Randy Orton – CrossRhodes