Royal Rumble 2016
Date: January 24, 2016
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s time to start the Road to Wrestlemania and it’s never started on this hot of a note. This year it’s all about the World Title as Roman Reigns is defending the title in the Royal Rumble itself for the first time ever. That leaves a lot of possible options open and with Reigns starting at #1, there could be a lot of drama by the end. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Darren Young/Damien Sandow vs. Ascension vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Mark Henry/Jack Swagger

One fall to a finish and the winning team gets spots in the Rumble. Swagger and Young get things going but it’s quickly off to Henry as the fans want Sandow. That changes into a “HEY! WE WANT SOME SANDOW!” chants and that’s exactly what they get, including the Wind-Up Elbow for two on Jack. Konnor tags himself in and it’s a big four way standoff as we take a break.

Back with Swagger holding Konnor in a chinlock but D-Von tags himself in, only to get stomped down in the corner. Konnor puts D-Von in a chinlock as the fans want Sexual Chocolate. D-Von avoids a charge and it’s a double tag to Bubba and Viktor with the former cleaning house. A Rock Bottom gets two on Viktor and Young takes What’s Up, meaning it’s table time. Actually scratch that as a 3D gets two on Viktor with Swagger making a fast save. Henry splashes D-Von and covers Viktor for the pin and the Rumble spots at 7:58.

Rating: D+. This was fine and the right team won. There’s no point in putting a thrown together team or either regular team in there so go with the two former World Champions. Neither of them have a chance of winning but at least they add a bit more prestige to the lineup. The match was just there but that’s all it was supposed to be.

Vince and Stephanie arrive before the opening video with Vince saying (while stooping down to be on JoJo’s height) they’re going to give Reigns an opportunity to do something unheard of tonight. Vince loves this night, almost as much as he loves himself. Pretty pointless scene but good night Vince is a ball of energy.

The opening video focuses on the statues before going into a regular video all about Reigns being up against the entire roster tonight.

Intercontinental Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging in his rematch from TLC and this is last man standing. It’s a brawl to start with Owens taking an early bulldog to send him outside. Dean sends him over the announcers’ table with a suicide dive with Cole being wiped out by Kevin. Owens hits the champ in the ribs with an iPad so Dean whips him into the steps for four. It’s already kendo stick time and Cole is suddenly a huge Ambrose fan.

Owens comes back with a Cannonball to drive Ambrose through the barricade for a nine. They head inside and the fans sound like they’re mainly on Owens’ side. The backsplash keeps Dean in trouble and it’s time to throw in a bunch of chairs. A chair to the back drops Ambrose again but Owens has a seat instead of following up. The Rebound Lariat puts Owens down but Dean has to counter the Pop Up Powerbomb with a backdrop through the chairs.

Kevin bails to the floor but suckers Dean in for some hard whips into the steps and a seven count. It’s table time (fan: “I feel like you’re wasting your time right now!”) as Dean is laying on the apron, which should earn him a count. Owens stacks up two tables on top of each other in front of a post but gets a chair pelted at his face. It hangs around his neck so Dean starts punching the chair until it falls off. That’s not the brightest thing in the world champ.

The Pop Up Powerbomb is countered with a hurricanrana and Dean grabs Dirty Deeds for eight. Dirty Deeds onto the chair has Owens in trouble but he rolls outside and onto his feet to break the count before collapsing. Dean loads up another table at ringside (“HEY! WE WANT SOME TABLES!”) and drops the top rope elbow for a double eight count. We get yet another table in the ring and they trade shouts of I HATE YOU.

Ambrose loads up a superplex through the table but Owens reverses into the fisherman’s superplex for the big crash. They’re both back up again so Owens grabs a hard Pop Up Powerbomb for nine and a half, only to have Dean collapse at 9.6. Frustration sets in for Owens as he loads up all the chairs and goes up, allowing Dean to shove him off the top and through the double tables at ringside for the win to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B. Good but certainly not great last man standing match. The double tables were clearly going to be the ending and it was just a matter of time instead of a big surprise at the end. It was good enough though and all it needed to be, though I was hoping Owens would get the title back. However, it leaves the door open for a big match at Wrestlemania which is the important thing.

We recap the destruction of Francesca the Trombone. That’s a really odd statement if you’re reading this a long time from now. In other words it’s time for the Tag Team Titles.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Usos

New Day (Kofi/Big E.) is defending and Kofi asks for a moment of silence, allowing Woods to debut Francesca II. Yes Xavier will miss Francesca but he has, ahem, needs. As for tonight, one of them will also win the Rumble because 2016 will be the year of all gold everything. Thankfully the Usos have the different color boots on again.

Kofi and Jimmy get things going with Kofi missing his reverse leapfrog, allowing Jimmy to throw him down. It’s off to Jey as we have a discussion of Byron’s street cred. Big E. comes in and sends Jey shoulder first into the post to take over. It’s back to Kofi to pummel away in the corner as Woods rants about being in the match as well. The fans want Woods to play Francesca but Woods says not so fast.

Both guys try superkicks (shocking I know) but Kofi pulls Jey down by the leg so Big E. can get in a splash. A slingshot stomp crushes Jey again but he enziguris Kofi off the apron and out to the floor for a nice crash. Jimmy gets the tag and starts cleaning house with a Samoan Drop and Whisper in the Wind getting two on Big E. Everything breaks down and Big E. knocks Jimmy off the top, setting up a belly to belly for two of his own.

Jey dives off the apron (out of the WWE Universe according to Cole) to take Kofi out, followed by Big E. spearing Jimmy through the apron in an always cool looking spot. Back in and the Midnight Hour is broken up, allowing Jimmy to superkick Kofi into a very quiet Superfly Splash. Woods makes the save though, earning himself a suicide dive from Jey. Back in and Jey superkicks Kofi down but misses a blind tag to Big E., allowing the Big Ending to pull Jey out of the air for the Big Ending to retain the titles at 10:54.

Rating: C+. This picked up a bit at the end but the tag division is at such a weak point right now that it’s hard to get excited about a match we’ve seen a few times already. I don’t know if they think the Usos getting the titles back is going to be a big deal but this never felt important or really anything more than just a regular title defense.

We recap the Highlight Reel from Monday and the ensuing chaos.

The Wyatts talk about slaughtering the Beast and the Chosen One. Tonight they slaughter them all on their way to the title. Then he really will have the whole world in his hands. Run.

US Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Kalisto

Del Rio is defending and this is the rubber match because WWE can’t count to four. They’ve traded the title in recent weeks with Del Rio’s League of Nations teammates beating Kalisto down three days earlier on Smackdown. Kalisto hammers away in the corner to start but gets kicked in the chest for two. Del Rio rains down some right hands in the corner but gets kicked in the back to knock him out to the floor.

We get another suicide dive to take the champ out but he knocks Kalisto off the top with an enziguri. A chinlock gives both guys a breather before the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker drops Kalisto again. They head outside again so Kalisto can snap off a hurricanrana. Byron: “Kalisto looked up to guys like Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero.” JBL: “He looks up to everybody Byron. He’s short!”

Del Rio whips him into the barricade and it’s time to go for the mask, which you know is enough to start a comeback. That’s quickly cut off by the low superkick for two but Del Rio misses another running enziguri. A very nice tornado DDT gets two for Kalisto and there’s the corkscrew crossbody. The hurricanrana driver gets two more but Kalisto takes too long going up, allowing Del Rio to reverse superplex to connect for two.

They botch a sunset bomb but Kalisto turns into a quick rollup for two more anyway in a close enough save. The top rope double stomp misses and a springboard Salida Del Sol gets two more with Alberto grabbing the bottom rope. Kalisto tries a springboard but lands on two knees for a unique counter. Del Rio would rather take the turnbuckle pad off though, only to be sent face first into the steel. A quick Salida Del Sol gives Kalisto the title back at 11:30.

Rating: C. This didn’t have nearly the surprise and shock factor that the first title change did but at least they got it back on Kalisto for a good moment. He’s more interesting as champion by default after Del Rio’s boring time with the belt so why not do something here to give us a nice moment? Another good match as this show is on a roll so far.

Kickoff recap.

Paul Heyman comes in to see Stephanie and the disgust is quickly on. Heyman talks about Brock winning the title tonight with just ten weeks before we go to Wrestlemania. He promises that Brock will eliminate the entire Wyatt Family tonight but all Stephanie cares about is Reigns being eliminated. If Brock gets rid of him, Stephanie will gradually renegotiate Lesnar’s deal, which is all Heyman wanted.

Ad for Edge and Christian’s Network show.

Fastlane ad.

We recap Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch. They were friends but Charlotte freaked out after losing to Becky, triggering a heel turn as Charlotte wanted to be more like her dad. Becky tricked Ric Flair into setting this up by implying that Charlotte was a coward.

Divas Title: Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending. Becky takes her to the mat to start but can’t get the arm this early. An armdrag sends Charlotte into the corner as they’re sprinkling in some Steamboat vs. Flair. The Figure Four doesn’t work so Charlotte cranks on an armbar of her own. The fans are entirely behind Becky here but Charlotte takes over with some good old cheating from her dad, who kisses Becky to distract her.

Back in and a suplex gets two for the champ and we hit the figure four neck lock with Charlotte slamming her face first into the mat. The hold stays on for a long time until Becky fights up with some running clotheslines. Becky forearms out of the Figure Eight and grabs a t-bone suplex for two. The running legdrops set up another t-bone but Charlotte hits a quick spear to take over again.

Becky is sat on top but grabs Charlotte’s arm and rolls into an armbreaker. That’s countered into a pretty impressive powerbomb for two more as Flair’s cheerleading gets louder and louder. Back up and Charlotte baseball slides her dad by mistake, allowing Becky to grab the Disarm-Her. Ric throws his coat onto Becky’s face though to break up the hold (and somehow not draw a DQ). Another spear retains Charlotte’s title at 12:37.

Rating: C-. As usual, the Divas are hurt by too many rest holds and WAY too much Ric Flair. This is getting into the Evolution format from thirteen years ago when it was already old. Not a great match here, which is a shame considering what these two are capable of doing. Just stop with the rest holds and the Ric and things will get better overnight.

Post match Charlotte beats Becky down even more until Sasha Banks comes out (on her own thank goodness)…..and kicks Becky to the floor. Sasha says she wants the title but waits until Ric leaves before putting on the Bank Statement. Somehow Flair doesn’t notice this for a bit, despite the fans going NUTS for it.

Some fans won a tour of the Performance Center from Chex Mix.

Rumble by the Numbers video. Good night they’re stretching the heck out of this.

WWE World Title: Royal Rumble

Roman Reigns is defending and is coming in at #1 with ninety second intervals. The fans instantly boo Reigns to continue their tradition. It’s Rusev in at #2 as we get the final two from last year starting this year. They slug it out to start and Rusev elbows out of a Samoan Drop. There’s a spinwheel kick to stagger the champ and Rusev throws him through the ropes to the floor. That sets up the Apron Boot and a spear to get rid of Rusev quick.

It’s…..AJ STYLES in at #3 and the fans lose their minds at the reveal. Roman looks as stunned as anyone as the announcers acknowledge the internet rumors, which to be fair were on WWE.com. An early Styles Clash attempt doesn’t work so AJ Pele Kicks him, only to have another Clash countered into the Samoan Drop. Tyler Breeze is in at #4 with kicks to both guys as the fans chant for AJ. Breeze can’t get Reigns out so AJ picks him up, only to have Roman punch AJ in the ribs, sending Breeze out to the floor.

Curtis Axel is in at #5 and actually gets in the ring. Axel actually gets the best of it to start but the Outcasts’ interference doesn’t work, allowing AJ to clothesline Axel to the floor. Chris Jericho is in at #6 and goes after Reigns before elbowing AJ down. Reigns is sent shoulder first into the post, leaving AJ to try another Clash on Jericho. That’s countered into a Walls of Jericho attempt but Reigns makes the save. Kane is in at #7 and Cole actually calls him arguably the greatest Rumble performer of all time. You know, minus the whole WINNING THE MATCH thing.

Kane kicks AJ in the face before going after the other two as things settle down. Goldust is in at #8 and Kane is the only person on his feet. Everyone gets into the same corner as the fans are still chanting for AJ. Ryback is in at #9 and WOW the fans are not happy. Kane and Jericho form an unlikely team (time heals all hot coffee wounds) to put Ryback on the apron but not to the floor. Kofi Kingston is in at #10 and goes after Jericho. AJ hits the springboard forearm on Jericho but gets dropped to the mat for his efforts.

Titus O’Neil is in at #11 and does the usual cleaning house spot, including eliminating Goldust. We’ve got Reigns, Styles, Ryback, Jericho, O’Neil, Kane and Kingston in at the moment and it’s R-Truth in at #12. That means it’s time for a ladder but there’s no briefcase to grab. Kane gets rid of him in a few seconds and throws Kofi out as well, only to have him land on Big E.’s shoulders for the save of the year. Kofi stops to have a Coke and it’s Luke Harper in at #13.

Cue the League of Nations and Vince to pulls Reigns to the floor for a beating, which is likely the way to keep him out of the match until much later. The camera ignores everything going on in the ring as the beating goes on, continuing a long stretch of bad camera work tonight. Stardust is in at #14 as Rusev splashes Reigns through the French announce table. We’ve been away from the ring for the better part of two minutes at this point.

The camera FINALLY goes back to the ring as the League walks off with a monitor for some reason. Kofi was eliminated off camera and it’s Big Show in at #15, giving us Show, Reigns (down on the floor), Styles, Jericho, Harper, Stardust, O’Neil, Ryback and Kane. Titus and Ryback are dumped by Big Show as a stretcher comes out for Reigns. Neville is in at #16 and Reigns gets off the stretcher but goes to the back anyway. We finally see that it was Jericho who eliminated Kofi earlier in the match.

Braun Strowman is in at #17 and runs people over before breaking Kane’s chokeslam attempt. Strowman dumps Kane with ease and it’s time for the showdown with Big Show. Another chokeslam attempt is broken up and Strowman chokes him out for another easy elimination. So the old giants are already out and we’re not even to #20 yet. That’s quite the surprise. Kevin Owens is in at #18, limping to the ring to sell the injuries from earlier.

We’ve got Jericho, Strowman, Harper, Stardust, Styles, Owens and Neville in the ring at the moment with Reigns in the back. Kevin goes right for AJ for the slugout but Neville breaks it up. The Clash is broken up again as Owens superkicks Styles and throws him out for a bit of a surprise. Dean Ambrose is in at #19 and goes right for Owens as you would expect. The fans start cheering for AJ as he leaves and we recap the League beating Reigns down earlier. Sami Zayn is in at #20 for a big surprise and goes right for Owens, tossing him in pretty short order.

Erick Rowan is in at #21 to give us three Wyatts with Bray still to come. The Wyatts get together to dump Stardust and Neville before Strowman starts choking Jericho. Mark Henry is in at #22 and Strowman slams him with ease. The three Wyatts dump Mark about ten seconds after he got in and get rid of Sami as well. Strowman chokes Jericho some more and it’s Lesnar in at #23. Brock goes right for Jericho and Strowman before suplexing anyone he can find.

We get Brock vs. Braun and a BIG forearm puts Strowman on his back. Lesnar clotheslines Rowan out and German suplexes Harper. Strowman elbows out of one but misses a charge into the post. Another clothesline drops Strowman and Brock is looking winded. Jack Swagger is in at #24 and charges right into an F5 for an elimination in fifteen seconds. We’ve got Lesnar, Strowman, Harper Ambrose and Jericho in the ring.

Miz is in at #25 and goes to commentary where he promises to turn Suplex City into Mizney World. Lesnar gets rid of Harper and it’s Alberto Del Rio in at #26. Brock throws him down with ease before clotheslining Braun a few times for the elimination. Del Rio, Jericho and Ambrose gang up on Lesnar and it’s Bray Wyatt (Cole makes it sound like a random Uso) in at #27. The rest of the Wyatts come back for the gang attack but Brock shrugs them off like the nothings they are.

It’s time for Bray vs. Brock and Wyatt is quickly suplexed. Harper saves Bray from the F5 though and we get a big gang beatdown. Sister Abigail allows the rest of the Family to dump Lesnar and set up a Wrestlemania match. Dolph Ziggler is in at #28 and starts cleaning house with his usual stuff. Miz finally gets in the ring and plants Dolph with the Skull Crushing Finale. It’s not enough for an elimination though as Jericho goes after Miz until Sheamus is in at #29. Reigns decks him in the aisle and gets back in to eliminate Miz and Del Rio.

Bray is up to go after Roman as Sheamus hasn’t gotten in the ring yet. The Superman Punch decks Wyatt and the booing is all over the place again. Reigns is the only man standing and indeed it’s HHH in at #30 to give us HHH, Reigns, Sheamus (on the floor) Jericho, Wyatt, Ambrose and Ziggler as the final group.

HHH and Reigns have their big staredown but Ziggler has to be Pedigreed. Bray gets speared and it’s back to the staredown with all seven still in. They slug it out with Reigns countering the Pedigree. Sheamus gets in and throws Reigns to the ropes before it’s time for the parade of finishers. Bray gets a Codebreaker and Lionsault but Jericho can’t put Reigns out. HHH sidesteps a charging Dolph for an elimination and we’re down to six.

Bray and HHH have a bizarre staredown but HHH points to Reigns. That’s not cool with Bray who punches the boss in the jaw, only to have Sister Abigail broken up with a Brogue Kick. HHH and Sheamus put Bray out but are both sent to the apron by Reigns. Ambrose takes Sheamus down with a neckbreaker but Jericho drops Dean with a high cross body. A Codebreaker drops HHH but Dean throws Chris out to give us Ambrose, HHH, Reigns and Sheamus (he’s always there near the end) for the final four.

Sheamus misses a Brogue Kick and gets Superman Punched to the floor, only to have HHH throw Reigns out for a big ovation. We’re down to Ambrose vs. HHH which is a really surprising final pairing. The fans are all behind Ambrose (duh) and there’s an early Rebound Lariat (which Cole actually calls, I kid you not, the Wacky Line). The Pedigree is broken up and Dean sends him to the apron but charges into a knee. HHH backdrops him out and wins the title at 1:02:45.

Rating: A-. That was exhausting. You kind of knew HHH was going to win but it’s still the right call as it sets up Reigns vs. HHH at some point, hopefully next month instead of in Dallas. I really liked the fact that they didn’t have HHH vs. Reigns as the final two as it would have been way too easy. Ambrose wasn’t going to win of course but it was nice to have the false hope instead of just going with the obvious.

The rest of the match was awesome though I have no idea what they’re thinking if they want to do Brock vs. Braun. It was almost painful watching them same spots over and over as Brock can only clothesline and knee him in the back so many times. Lesnar was kind of all over the place in this as he really doesn’t fit the wrecking machine mold like you would expect him to.

It was a good enough night for surprises with AJ (I had forgotten he was in by the end though that’s not a criticism) and Sami, who hopefully is main roster bound soon, as the main names. It’s probably best that they didn’t do the legends and such in a match for the title so well done all around. Really good Rumble and easily the best in years, at least partially because of the options near the end. I know I say that a lot but they’re so important in a match like this.

A very quick celebration takes us out as it’s 11pm.

Overall Rating: A. Oh yeah this was great. The Rumble is a tricky show as it’s all about the one big match and it more than delivered this year. On top of that though we had four good to really good matches for a strong undercard. I had a great time with this show, though I’m really curious to see what they have planned for Wrestlemania at this point. HHH vs. Reigns really isn’t a strong enough headliner though I’m not sure what else they have with so many injuries. Still though, great stuff here and an awesome show.

Results

Dean Ambrose b. Kevin Owens – Ambrose shoved Owens through two tables

New Day b. Usos – Big Ending to Jey

Kalisto b. Alberto Del Rio – Salida Del Sol

Charlotte b. Becky Lynch – Spear

HHH won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Dean Ambrose

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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205 Live
Date: January 22, 2021
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

It’s another special show this week with two more Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic matches. That’s a very good idea as the tournaments are going to consist of twenty two matches and after tonight, nearly than a fifth of them will have taken place here. That’s going to relieve some pressure on NXT, which is a good service that 205 Live can provide. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long tournament recap, including the stories that lead into tonight’s matches. This is more detail than a 205 Live preview usually gets.

Women’s Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: The Way vs. Gigi Dolin/Cora Jade

It’s Indi Hartwell/Candice LeRae for the Way and that would be Priscilla Kelly/Elayna Black, both of whom are making their debuts. This is also the first ever women’s match in 205 Live history. Jade gets in a shot to Hartwell’s arm to start and hands it off to Dolin in a hurry for some shots to the face. LeRae comes in but misses a legdrop, allowing Dolin to drive her back into the corner.

It’s back to Jade, who gets caught in an early neck crank to put her in trouble. Hartwell adds a running shot in the corner before slapping on the cravate. A side slam gets two on Jade and it’s back to LeRae for her own chinlock. Jade kicks her away without much effort and hands it back to Dolin to kick away at Hartwell. Hartwell powers her way out of a double suplex and hands it back to LeRae. That means Jade can grab a few rollups for two each but a belly to back slam lets Hartwell pin Jade at 5:57.

Rating: C. This wasn’t much of a showcase for Dolin and Jade but more a way to get their feet wet in a WWE ring. In that regard, it worked out fine, especially in a match they had next to no chance of winning. The Way very well could be favorites to win the whole tournaments and they’re already in the final four, so at least they’re off to a good start.

Men’s Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese vs. Tommaso Ciampa/Timothy Thatcher

Ciampa and Thatcher have taken the spot of the injured Ashante Adonis/Desmond Troy. They just happened to beat the heck out of each other in the Fight Pit earlier this week but the word “respect” was dropped so all was forgiven. Thatcher grabs Daivari by the face to start and headlocks him to the mat. A hammerlock takes Daivari down again and the surfboard makes it even worse. Daivari gets up and manages to push Thatcher over for the tag to Nese, though I’m more interested in the Nintendo 64 shirt in the crowd.

That’s fine with Thatcher, as Ciampa takes over on Nese’s arm and hands it off to Ciampa. Nese takes him down by the leg but is quickly caught in a front facelock as this is a very grappling heavy match so far. Daivari comes in but Nese gets in a cheap shot, allowing Daivari to wrap Ciampa’s knee around the post. Back in and the Figure Four keeps Ciampa’s knee in trouble, with Nese offering a distraction so he can pull Daivari into the corner.

Ciampa gets out and scores with an enziguri, allowing the hot tag off to Thatcher. Uppercuts abound with Nese having to break up an ankle lock. Daivari’s Persian Splash gets two and the next hot tag brings Ciampa back in to clean house. Thatcher and Ciampa knock them both to the floor and it’s Willow’s Bell for the pin on Nese at 8:15.

Rating: C-. This was another match that wasn’t exactly in doubt but it was a little more competitive than the first. Ciampa and Thatcher could well be dark horses to pull off the whole thing and that could make for something interesting. The men’s brackets are looking good so far and we could be in for some cool matches as we move forward. Ciampa and Thatcher didn’t seem to quite trust each other but that’s the case for most thrown together teams.

Here are the second round brackets:

Undisputed Era

Tommaso Ciampa/Timothy Thatcher

Kushida/Leon Ruff

Grizzled Young Veterans

MSK

Drake Maverick/Killian Dain

Lucha House Party

Legado Del Fantasma

Overall Rating: C. Again, this was a show designed to take pressure off of NXT and there is nothing wrong with that. 205 Live is hardly the most important show in the world on its own so switching things over for a few weeks isn’t going to hurt anything. The Dusty Classics are big tournaments so letting 205 Live host some matches is a good way to keep things moving. Nothing must see here, but it did what it was supposed to do.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Main Event
Date: January 21, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe

We’re well on the way to the Royal Rumble and that means things should be picking up around here. Unfortunately that has a tendency not to be the case on this show, but at least we are only going to have to deal with a few moments from last week’s Raw, which isn’t something that should be highlighted. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Akira Tozawa vs. Angel Garza

Rematch from last week when Garza won because yay for continuity. Tozawa shouts a lot and kicks him in the ribs only to have Garza kick him in the face. That means GARZA TAKES OFF HIS PANTS, setting up a penalty kick for two. Garza bends the leg around the rope in the corner and fires off some more kicks (he has a theme tonight), followed by the leglock. The leg gets tied up even more for something like the STF’s weird cousin (I think he’s named Marvin) until Garza picks him up for a reverse slingshot suplex. Tozawa fights up and tries the Octopus but gets superkicked down. The Wing Clipper finishes for Garza at 5:15.

Rating: D+. Total squash here and that’s how it probably should have gone. I continue to be confused with the lack of anything for Garza to do on Raw as he really is good enough for something on that show. I’ve liked Tozawa for a long time but he was in over his head here as Garza was looking sharp.

Video on Adam Pearce winning the gauntlet match to become #1 contender, with a bit of help from Roman Reigns.

From Smackdown.

Here are Roman Reigns and company for the contract signing with Adam Pearce. In a nice touch, Pearce comes out with no music, because he really doesn’t have a personality. Pearce sits but Reigns wants his chair. Jey gets Pearce out of the chair to give it to Reigns, because he is sitting at the head of the table. They both sign, with Reigns smirking a lot. Pearce says he has been waiting all night for Reigns to do that, picks up the contract, and leaves.

Pearce starts limping on his way up the ramp, saying it’s an old injury that flare up every now and then. However, all WWE contracts say “card subject to change”, an as a WWE official, Pearce will find a suitable replacement for Reigns. That’s just what he has in mind, so cue Kevin Owens to sign the contract to face Reigns at the Rumble in the Last Man Standing match. Just like Raw has done a few times in recent weeks, the show cuts off during commentary’s closing line. Fair enough on the switch, and it worked well enough as a way to get Owens another match.

From Raw.

And now, the Dirt Sheet, because we need another talk show. Miz and John Morrison talk about how great things could be for Goldberg if he wins the title one more time. That brings us to their guest tonight: Goldberg! Uh….make that Gillberg! As cliched as that might be, it’s nice to see Gillberg after his recent health issues. Anyway, Gillberg talks about everything he does in his entrance, but here’s…..a mini Drew McIntyre to interrupt.

After putting in the mini sword (Joe: “That’s the Clayless.”), mini Drew (with his kilt a bit too low and having to adjust his hair) says he is here to address his Royal Rumble opponent face to face. Drew promises to kick Goldberg back to 1998 and then go home and eat some hagis. Morrison mocks Drew’s accent and Drew breaks character, asking if we can do it again. Miz snaps on Morrison for getting an actor from New Jersey instead of New York, LA or Cleveland. Morrison: “CLEVELAND???”

Gillberg interrupts with his goofy face and gets a double shut up. They decide to wrap it up with Miz saying Drew and Goldberg will both lose at the Rumble because Miz is cashing in, because he’s the Miz and he is……next. Miz and Morrison bickering was funny but after everything else on this show, this was a really bad idea. Except for Gillberg, because Gillberg is awesome.

We get a special report, featuring HHH (Henry E. Panki) and Stephanie McMahon (Anita Reelman) as news reporters. Weatherman Sunny McCloud (Roman Reigns) and Paul Heyman announce that Wrestlemania XXXVII will be in Tampa. Hailey Mary (Sasha Banks) is in Dallas, where Wrestlemania XXXVIII will be held in 2022. Then Hugh Kantseeme (John Cena) is in Los Angeles, where Wrestlemania XXXIX will be held in 2023. Then they’re off the air and HHH and Stephanie take off their costumes to say they were both awesome. This is….uh….well it’s different. We’ll go with different.

Humberto Carrillo vs. Drew Gulak

Feeling out process to start with Carrillo armdragging him into an armbar as commentary actually remembers that Carrillo had a US Title shot on last year’s Royal Rumble Kickoff Show. I watched that show yesterday and didn’t remember it so well done. Gulak fights up but it’s the springboard headbutt to put him back down for the first two. Another springboard is countered with a shove out to the floor in a crash though and we take a break.

Back with Carrillo fighting out of an armbar and nailing an enziguri for a breather. There’s a backbreaker for two on Gulak and something like a Spanish Fly into a small package gets the same. Carrillo’s high angle springboard armdrag is blocked and Gulak goes for the cross armbreaker. A foot in the rope breaks it up so Gulak plants him down for two more. Carrillo is right back up with a springboard kick to the face though and the moonsault finishes Gulak at 10:41.

Rating: C. Not a bad match at all here as both guys are good at what they do in the ring. The big problem for both continues to be a lack of a reason to care about them, but Gulak has shown some spots of charisma when he is given the rare chance to showcase himself. I can get why he isn’t given that chance very often, but at least he shines when he can.

From Raw.

From the shadows, Randy Orton talks about people who fight fire with fire usually wind up with ashes. We see a mask over his face as he says the voices in his head have never been louder. He talks about needing to redirect his pure hatred and we see Alexa Bliss throwing the fireball last week. The fire that melted the skin off his face will never go away. He is wearing his mask to protect himself but to shield everyone else from the horror.

The burns could have been much worse or could have disfigured him forever. Orton doesn’t blame her though because he blames the Fiend. Orton blames the Fiend for this because he knows what the Fiend wants. The Fiend wants to stop Orton from achieving the inevitable. We see clips of Orton’s two Royal Rumble wins as Orton talks about how he would be a threat to win the Rumble even if you chopped off all of his limbs.

He enjoys the pain and you can blame the Fiend when he burns everyone’s Wrestlemania dreams to ashes. Orton lights and the blows out a match. That was certainly different, though would it have been too much to wait more than a week after he was burned to appear again? That’s not enough to be gone for another show?

From Raw.

Here is Alexa Bliss for Alexa’s Playground. She wants to address the viper in the room. Things got a little heated with Randy Orton last week but she knows someone if he is interested in some sunblock. As for tonight though, her guest is Asuka, who looks scared of where to sit. Bliss says that isn’t your seat, but she wasn’t talking to Asuka. For now though, Bliss has some special news.

After asking the invisible person in the swing if she should tell them, she announces her entry into the Royal Rumble. That means she could go on to Wrestlemania to face Asuka, who says she is a big fan of Bliss. Asuka, sounding rather nervous, says yowie wowie. Bliss apologizes to whoever is next to her and Asuka starts dancing. Bliss shouts to stop it and talks to the swing. Asuka tries to calm Bliss down by saying he is still here, but Bliss says not to say his name. A scared Asuka leaves.

From Raw.

Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss

Non-title. Asuka starts fast and doesn’t seem so scared this time around. An early Shining Wizard connects and Bliss is rocked, but the lights go out Fiend style. Bliss smiles a lot as we take a break. Back with Bliss seemingly transformed (and maybe with different lipstick) into the serious version and Asuka not being sure what to do.

Bliss blocks and dodges a bunch of strikes before shouldering Asuka down without much trouble. Back in and the Mandible Claw is loaded up but Asuka manages to block it. The rapid fire kicks rock Bliss but she grabs Sister Abigail and, with a blank stare, finishes Asuka at 11:36.

Rating: D+. And so we have another example of WWE doing their storytelling thing. I get the idea they’re going for here and it does make Bliss out to be a monster, but Asuka being scared or whatever is not like her whatsoever. She can go with the silly and such, but having her be scared feels out of character. Also, can anyone give me a logical reason why she and Charlotte are Tag Team Champions at the moment other than Charlotte getting another title reign?

Post match the lights flash and Bliss’ makeup changes because she’s the happy version again. Fiend’s LET ME IN ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. All this show did was remind me of the gap between Raw and Smackdown, which grows larger by the week. Raw really has become one of the most dreadful shows in a long time while Smackdown, which still isn’t exactly a masterpiece, continues its steady progression and that’s all it needs to do. The gap continues to expand and I’m almost scared to see how much worse things get in the next few weeks and months.

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This is one of the bigger ones as the angles are the things that carry the audience’s interest. There were some good ones throughout the year and it might be nice to look back at them after so many things went badly this year. Wrestling had a hard time making things work and yet there were more than a few good options to pick from. Hopefully my memory is working this time so let’s get to it.

As usual, in no particular order until the winner at the end.

Who Is Returning To Impact Wrestling?

I’m not sure what else to call this or even if it counts as an angle, but I had a great time watching this over the summer. Someone who had been released from WWE was going to be returning to the company at Slammiversary and it became a huge Whoisit story. That’s one of the best angles that can be done and the big reveals at the end were….well just ok at best, but at least the build up was great.

Golden Role Models Explode

It’s a story that was built up for a very long time and then they finally paid the whole thing off. I’m not sure if it was worth all of the time and effort put in, but everything they set up felt like it was building to a moment and then we actually got there. These two have a very detailed history together and then they kept building on it even more, with the two of them owning all of the women’s titles. It felt like a big deal when they got to the ending and the match in the Cell, with Bayley finally losing the title, was rather good. This was long form storytelling and you don’t get that very often in WWE.

The Rise And Fall Of Hangman Page

Now this one is interesting as I could see it seems like we have only seen part of the story so far. Page started the year hot by winning the Tag Team Titles with Kenny Omega but seemed to like booze more than anything else, including his partner. He continues to seem to be trying to find himself but has no way of knowing where to look. The idea of Page ultimately discovering his inner….whatever it is and dethroning Omega to win the World Title is incredibly intriguing, but for now, I’ll settle for him becoming a lost soul and slowly starting to work his way back to the real world, because the details in this have been very good so far.

Randy Orton vs. The Legends

I’m a sucker for Orton. Even though he has done something similar more than once before, it is something he does rather well and it was nice to see various other legends other than Ric Flair (though of course we had Flair in there too because we have to) involved for a change. The sequence of legends in the ambulance match worked too and Orton even wound up winning the World Title to have the story mean something in the end. Not bad for something that has been done probably half a dozen times before.

Those were all good, but there wasn’t much doubt on this one.

Roman Reigns Is The Head Of The Table

Reigns came back at Summerslam and seemed to have an edge to him but it didn’t exactly feel like some big game changer. Then one night the camera panned out to show Paul Heyman next to him and it was clear that we were in for something new. With the big change taking place, it became very obvious that Reigns wasn’t just a heel but rather THE heel, as he was the monster that everyone had been wanting to see him as for years. This went rolling for a few months and showed no signs of slowing down at the end of the year. Throw in Reigns getting great matches out of Jey Uso and this was the head of the list with no question about it.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 25, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and the big draw this week is the double return of Drew McIntyre and Goldberg. I’m not sure how much of an appeal that is supposed to have but WWE certainly sees something in it. Also we get a rematch from last week with Asuka defending the Women’s Title against Alexa Bliss, because WWE doesn’t like waiting on much. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Drew McIntyre to get things going. Drew is rather emotional to be back here and thanks everyone who sent him well wishes. The virus is a horrible thing but we are going to get through it together. Speaking of things we will get through, this Sunday it is going to be Drew McIntyre vs. Bill Goldberg for the WWE Title. Goldberg was 173-0 in WCW and ran through the Rock like he was nothing….and then he disappeared.

The last thing to go in a heavyweight fighter is his power but Goldberg has started a new streak. Every champion he has challenged since returning to WWE has gone down but on Sunday, Drew is ending the streak. Cue Miz and John Morrison to mock the idea of King Kong vs. Godzilla on Sunday because one of them could wind up injured after the match. That opens a door for a Money in the Bank cash-in because whoever wins is going to be a sitting duck.

Miz promises to win the title but here’s Goldberg to cut them off. Goldberg: “You, me, Sunday, you’re next.” The staredown is on so Miz and Morrison make some jokes from the apron, earning themselves a double beatdown, with Miz taking the spear and Morrison getting Claymored. Another staredown ensues as I beg of WWE to end the Miz thing on Sunday because it is managing to hurt a story that had almost nothing going for it in the first place.

Charlotte says she knows how to perform well under pressure. Tonight she wants Shayna Baszler to bring her invisible crown because it’s one thing to pretend to be a queen and another to actually be one. On Sunday, she is entering the Royal Rumble and defending the Tag Team Titles. As for Lacey Evans and Ric Flair, she has seen her father in some dark places before but this might be the darkest. She’ll be ready though, because she is Ms. Wrestlemania.

Charlotte vs. Shayna Baszler

Nia Jax is here with Shayna Baszler but Asuka isn’t here because she and Charlotte are the most worthless Tag Team Champions in the history of the title. Charlotte starts fast by kicking Baszler down and hitting a baseball slide on Jax. The Figure Eight goes on in a hurry but Jax comes in for the DQ at 56 seconds. Good, as there is no reason to burn off Charlotte vs. Baszler in a real match here.

Post match the beatdown is on with Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke coming in for the failed save. Lacey Evans is in as well and the six woman is ready for after the break.

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke/Charlotte vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax/Lacey Evans

Mandy and Lacey exchange wristlocks to start before it’s off to Dana to knock Lacey down again. Shayna and Charlotte come in with Shayna kicking away at the leg. That’s enough to send Charlotte over for another tag to Mandy, who takes Baszler into the corner. The alternating beatdown is on with Charlotte kneeing Baszler outside. Charlotte stops to glare at Nia and Lacey but gets rammed into the apron. Shayna throws her back inside….and doesn’t beat the count at 4:44. Everyone seems confused and I can’t imagine that was the planned finish because it just ended out of nowhere.

And never mind as we come back from a break with the match continuing thanks to a decision made by Adam Pearce during the break. Jax runs Brooke over with a clothesline and taking her into the corner. Shayna does the stomp down onto Dana’s arm but Dana gets over for the tag to Mandy anyway. Everything breaks down and Charlotte chases Lacey over the barricade as Dana gets the tag again. Nia misses a charge into the post and Dana gets two off a running flip neckbreaker. A powerbomb into a chokeslam plants Dana again and the legdrop finishes for Nia at 14:05 (counting the break).

Rating: D+. Again. They did it again. One more time, Nia and Shayna beat Dana and Mandy because that’s all these four know how to do. The law of diminishing returns has been in effect for months with these teams but here we are again. Speaking of again, Charlotte and Asuka still might as well not be a team, so hopefully they lose the titles on Sunday and end this worthless idea.

We look at Mace beating Xavier Woods last week.

Mustafa Ali loved what he saw and is ready to destroy Kofi Kingston.

Earlier today, Ali talked about coming after Kofi because he had the greatest moment in his life after Ali had the worst moment of his life.

Xavier Woods vs. Slapjack

Woods charges at him to start but gets kneed down for his efforts. Slapjack bangs up his knee on a missed double stomp though and Woods strikes away. Woods nails a running knee to finish Slapjack for the pin at 2:49.

Post match Retribution beats Woods down, with Ali grabbing a chair. Instead he sits down in it though and says for someone who acts like a king, Woods looks like a peasant right now. Ali has heard that Kofi won’t be competing in the Royal Rumble, but don’t worry because he’ll take Kofi’s place.

Riddle is on his way to the ring when he runs into R-Truth, who has heard about a birthday party. Truth thinks it is for him because it was his birthday last week and they might have 24 karat gold carrots for him. Goat noises are shared.

It’s time for the talk show before a match involving the people in the talk show, this time featuring the Hurt Business in the VIP Lounge. MVP is ready to own the Royal Rumble and tells Cedric Alexander to focus on the task at hand tonight. Bobby Lashley talks about how the team is draped in gold (and silver) and they are just beginning. They have a present for MVP in the form of a THB chain. MVP is rather impressed but Cedric and Shelton argue over the design.

Cue R-Truth to ask about the surprise party, because THB must mean Truth Happy Birthday. Shelton: “Truth, now is not the time.” Truth: “Is it a dance break?” Lashley apologizes for forgetting his birthday last week but he has a gift inside the ring. Here comes the Menagerie of Numskulls to go after the title, with the Hurt Business getting involved. MVP isn’t impressed, but here’s Riddle with the Final Flash to knock him silly. It takes talent to squeeze in two stupid ideas into one segment so well done.

Edge is back tonight. Works for me.

R-Truth asks Adam Pearce if he can enter the Money in the Bank match. AJ Styles and Omos come up with AJ offering his services in a qualifying match. Styles says he’s benevolent, so Truth says he’s a Capricorn. Pearce says if Truth can beat AJ, he’ll consider a Rumble spot. Truth things Omos is a Taurus, like the one he had that broke down one time. Confused Truth is still one of my favorite things in WWE.

We look back at the opening segment.

Sheamus vs. John Morrison

Both are officially in the Rumble and Miz is in Morrison’s corner. Morrison takes him down with a headlock to start but Sheamus is back up with a hammerlock. The chinlock keeps Morrison down until he fights up, only to get backdropped right back down. Morrison gets in a shot to the throat and break dances over for a kick to the back. Sheamus pops up and grabs the Irish Curse for two before heading to the top.

The top rope clothesline is dropkicked out of the air with a shot to the knee, setting up a running knee to put Sheamus on the apron. Back in and Morrison works on the leg with a leg crank and an elbow to the knee. Sheamus uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom, setting up a release Rock Bottom for two more. The Cloverleaf is blocked and it’s a knee to the face to set up White Noise to finish Morrison at 9:33.

Rating: C. As usual, this worked out well and I’m not surprised by this. They’re always good together and that was on display again. It’s a little weird to have the heel as the speed and the face as the power, but they kept Miz to a minimum and let the guys do their thing, which is exactly the right idea.

Post match Miz wants a handicap match so that’s on as well, as we now have a third Miz and Morrison segment in the first two hours.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Sheamus

No tags here as Morrison takes out Sheamus’ knee to start so Miz can get a DDT for two. An enziguri into a clothesline puts Sheamus on the floor, with Morrison nailing a nice dive. Sheamus gets sent hard into the barricade for some running shots to the head. Back in and Miz stomps Sheamus down in the corner but Sheamus manages to send Morrison outside.

A running clothesline drops Miz and there’s a powerslam to the returning Morrison. Sheamus Regal Rolls Miz onto Morrison and then sends them outside for the double top rope clothesline. Morrison breaks up the Brogue Kick back inside but Sheamus shrugs off the Skull Crushing Finale. The Brogue Kick drops Morrison but it’s the Skull Crushing Finale to finish Sheamus at 6:49.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I thought I would have, and as much as I want to put Miz into that briefcase and send him to the planet Flaflooga, Sheamus got into the zone that he rarely reaches anymore and that’s a good thing. He really can do the power thing well and Miz and Morrison work well together in spots like this. Sheamus and Morrison have some very good chemistry together as well so I’m not sure why I’m surprised I had a good time here.

Ric Flair and Lacey Evans grapple a bit when Charlotte comes in. Lacey leaves and Flair says he’s doing what he wants to do. Charlotte says he spent his money on everyone but his family but this isn’t cute anymore. Flair is going from legend to old man and she isn’t the bad guy. Ric glares at her as Lacey comes back in and hits her with the Woman’s Right. Lacey asks Flair to explain the WOO as they leave Charlotte laying.

AJ Styles vs. R-Truth

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with Truth sending him over the top but getting caught in a staredown with Styles. Back in and AJ misses the Phenomenal Forearm, allowing Truth to start up the John Cena finishing sequence. There’s the Shuffle but the AA is countered into the Calf Crusher for the tap at 2:35.

We look back at Randy Orton being all masked and creepy. I think this is just airing the same segment from last week.

And now, Alexa’s Playground with Bliss reciting Mary Mary Quite Contrary. She loves what she and Fiend did to Randy Orton two weeks ago and looks at a video of last week’s promo (which we just saw). Bliss thinks he looks better now and says that she just wanted to have some fun with Asuka in her playground. Now we look at Bliss watching herself and Asuka from last week (after watching her talk on the big screens in the Thunderdome). Bliss throws in some Ring Around The Rosey and her face turns into the Fiend for the LET ME IN. Total time spent on watching recaps: seven minutes.

Riddle vs. Hurt Business

Gauntlet match and if Riddle wins, he gets a title shot at Lashley. Shelton Benjamin starts things off and counters a kick into a spinebuster for two. The chinlock goes on and Shelton adds a knee but gets pulled into a guillotine. Shelton tries to muscle him into a suplex so Riddle knees him in the head. A rollup should have Riddle pinned but Cedric Alexander gets on the apron. Shelton yells at Alexander and gets rolled up for the pin at 4:48. MVP is in next and, as he yells at Shelton and Alexander for arguing, gets pulled into a kneebar for the tap at 5:24. Cedric is in last and we take a break.

Back with Cedric putting a knee in Riddle’s back and cranking on the arm. Riddle fights up so Cedric hits a heck of a dropkick for two. The abdominal stretch goes on but Riddle reverses into a suplex, which is countered into a DDT. Back up and Riddle kicks him in the head to start the real comeback.

A t-bone suplex sends Alexander flying but he gets the knees up to block the Broton. Riddle grabs a German suplex to put Alexander down again, only to get pulled into a brainbuster for two more. A quick triangle choke is countered into a powerbomb but Riddle hangs onto the choke. Back up and Riddle grabs a rollup for the pin at 12:24.

Rating: C. Riddle vs. Shelton and MVP were about as nothing as you could get but Alexander had a good match. That being said, the whole Hurt Business in-fighting stuff is still one of the worst things going on around here as of late. It isn’t that surprising though, as the team is good, polished and feel like a threat so they must be stamped out.

Post match Lashley comes out to give Riddle the Hurt Lock to leave him laying.

The WWE Network is moving to Peacock. If it doesn’t increase the price and you get the same things, I’m good with it.

We look at the opening sequence again.

Edge joins us for the first time in several months to talk about how you aren’t guaranteed tomorrow. Ten years ago, he went to Wrestlemania XXVII and left as champion. Then he lost everything because of his neck and took nine years to get back. He remembers telling his mom that he wanted to be a wrestler and she told him you have to go do it.

With that in mind, he is entering the Royal Rumble. He doesn’t have much time left so he is going to fight with everything he has to make this far fetched dream come true. If you have been with him on this ride until now, you have to try. A world without dreamers and fighters is a much less magical place. He quotes Henry Ford, who said if you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right. Edge thinks he can, and he’ll see us at the Royal Rumble.

Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss

Bliss is challenging in a rematch from last week. Asuka takes her down into an armbar to start but misses the hip attack. Bliss kicks her to the floor….and then gets on the rocking horse that appears in the ring. Back from a break with Bliss fighting out of a chinlock and getting kicked in the face. Asuka hits another kick in the corner but Bliss’ old music starts playing and now she has her regular gear on (and longer hair).

Bliss sends Asuka face first into the corner and then the lights go out, with Bliss going into the other corner. She does Bray Wyatt’s lean backwards and becomes Fiend Bliss. Asuka’s knee to the face just annoys Bliss and the Asuka Lock but Bliss powers out of it. The Mandible Claw goes on but here’s Randy Orton with red makeup because this company doesn’t know how burns work either for an RKO to Bliss and the no contest at 12:33.

Rating: F. I like Randy Orton, I like Alexa Bliss and I like Asuka. If you put all three of those people into a match and angle, I should like the product. Instead, this was like an eight year old on a sugar rush saying “And then this happens and then this happens but it doesn’t count and then this happens and then the show is over.” They had part of a match and then it was something about a horse and a goddess walking into an RKO. I would say I probably got some of the details wrong in there, but I don’t think there were any details involved in the first place.

Overall Rating: D. And yet, somehow it’s better than last week’s show. This show was going along somewhat nicely and then went FLYING off the rails in the end, with one dumb idea after another. Maybe it’s all the time that they have to fill, but the more I think about it, the more worried I am that this is really what they think is the best use of Raw every week. Between the wrestlers working multiple times, the people watching promos from last week and people doing completely stupid things just because the script calls for it, this was another shining example of how bad Raw can be and that’s a scary thought going forward.

Results

Charlotte b. Shayna Baszler via DQ when Nia Jax interfered

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler/Lacey Evans b. Charlotte/Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke – Legdrop to Brooke

Xavier Woods b. Slapjack – Knee to the face

Sheamus b. John Morrison – White Noise

Miz/John Morrison b. Sheamus – Skull Crushing Finale

AJ Styles b. R-Truth – Calf Crusher

Riddle b. Hurt Business – Rollup to Alexander

Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss went to a no contest

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Royal Rumble 2015
Date: January 25, 2015
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,164
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Now this is one I’ve been looking forward to and dreading at the same time. I actually didn’t mind the main event the first time around but ever since then I haven’t been able to think of a single good thing that match did. It should be interesting (hopefully) to see how far this thing has fallen in just a year. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. New Day

Talk about a year making a big difference. Cesaro and Kidd looked to be the hottest team in years and now they’re both out while New Day, who looked to be a horrible disaster, actually IS the hottest team in years. As usual, time can change so much in wrestling. As usual, Woods is the odd man out here. Adam Rose is here with Kidd/Cesaro for no adequately explained reason but the fans would rather cheer for Cesaro anyway.

Kidd and Big E. get things going as the announcers talk about the Rumble instead. Ok to be fair, it’s a pre-show tag match with nothing on the line so I can live with it here. Big E. grabs a few backbreakers to start before it’s off to Kofi for two off a dropkick. Cesaro comes in for a BIG reaction and you can tell who the star of this match is going to be.

It’s quickly back to Big E. who takes over with a shoulder in the corner, followed by a middle rope cross body from Kofi. Lawler: “I like New Day but I’m excited to see what they’re going to evolve into.” Cesaro and Kidd take Kofi into the corner and I still don’t get why Rose is on the floor. Like, I don’t remember that in the slightest and it’s bizarre to see a year later. The Cesaro Swing into the dropkick (still awesome) gets two and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro holding Kofi in a chinlock but Kingston comes back with a dropkick to Kidd. Big E. starts cleaning house with clotheslines and the fans are REALLY not pleased. Cesaro charges into a Rock Bottom (well close enough to one) out of the corner for two. Kidd is sent to the floor for a flip dive from Kofi, followed by Big E. spearing Cesaro through the ropes for a big crash.

It’s Cesaro on his own against both guys but Big E. is sent outside and Kofi gets kicked in the head, setting up a superplex into a springboard elbow from Kidd for a VERY close two. A sunset flip gets two on Kofi with Cesaro holding Kidd in place for a smart move. Trouble in Paradise is countered into the Sharpshooter but Big E. makes the save with a belly to belly. Rose gets on the apron and gets kicked in the head, only to have Kidd grab a fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin on Kofi at 11:03.

Rating: B-. Well that worked. This is why having a hot tag division is so important: you can wake up the crowd in a match that really doesn’t matter either way because both teams looked great. New Day could clearly go in the ring but it would still be a few months before they really figured it out. Well that and until they were allowed to have some personality, which was the cure all along.

The opening video is about finding the moment that cements what you are. However, there can only be one. Tonight, someone’s moment becomes a reality. The triple threat gets a little attention as well.

New Age Outlaws vs. Ascension

This is fallout from the Outlaws, the NWO and Acolytes beating down the Ascension for not respecting the veterans enough or something. Yeah it ruined another act that was built up for over a year in NXT but HHH’s buddies got a pay per view appearance out of it. Gunn and Viktor get things going and all it takes is a hiptoss to draw the YOU STILL GOT IT chant. Fans get easier to impress every year. Dogg comes in for the shaky knee drop on Konnor but the young guys take over with a chinlock.

As the match slows down (likely so the Outlaws can breathe), JBL regales us with tales of Bullet Bob Armstrong vs. Buddy Colt. Konnor puts on a chinlock and Dogg taps, likely because tapping out wasn’t a thing when he started. The match keeps going anyway with Dogg avoiding an elbow drop, only to be chinlocked down by Viktor. That goes nowhere and the hot tag brings in Billy to clean house, only to miss the Fameasser and walk into the Fall of Man for the pin at 5:26.

Rating: D. And of course this launched the Ascension up the card and into the Tag Team Title scene forevermore. Yeah of course they never recovered after getting beaten down by a bunch of old retired guys and then winning a meaningless match against a long past retired team because…..yeah I think you know why this didn’t work, or at least you should.

We look at Sting saving Cena from Big Show/Kane/Seth Rollins on Raw. Sting isn’t on the show or anything but he had a cameo there of course. Cena winning however did get Dolph Ziggler, Ryback and Erick Rowan their jobs back but Rowan didn’t qualify for the Rumble. At least the match meant something.

The Authority isn’t pleased with Sting doing that WCW nonsense around here. Cue Paul Heyman who says Brock can help with their problems, whatever those are.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Damien Mizdow/Miz

The Usos are defending but Mizdow is the most over guy in the match. Speaking of things that have changed a lot in a year. The Usos took the titles from Miz/Mizdow to close out 2014 so this is the rematch. Jey and Miz get things going and the fans already want Mizdow. Something like a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two on Miz as Cole recap Miz trying to get Naomi on their side with promises of Hollywood fame.

Miz gets crotched on top so Mizdow (gently) does the same, continuing the one idea act that somehow had fans cheering for him. Miz’s top rope ax handle is punched out of the air so Mizdow goes up and dives into a punch from no one. The fans think Mizdow is awesome, meaning it’s time for a chinlock from Miz himself. The Reality Check gets two but Miz won’t tag Mizdow in. Again, this doesn’t make a ton of sense as Miz is making himself wrestle the whole match by himself.

Anyway, Jimmy gets away and tags in Jey to take over with the running Umaga Attack in the corner but Miz grabs a DDT for two. Everything breaks down and both Usos hit a dive to take out both challengers, though Jey almost misses Miz, drawing a rather rude chant from the fans.

Back in and Jey misses the Superfly Splash, allowing Miz to get two off the Skull Crushing Finale. The second attempt at the Splash connects but Mizdow breaks it up, drawing the loudest pop you will EVER hear for a heel breaking up a cover. Mizdow’s Skull Crushing Finale gets two on Jimmy, who superkicks Miz into a powerbomb from Jey. Jimmy’s Superfly Splash retains the titles at 9:20.

Rating: C-. Nothing special here as Miz/Mizdow’s one joke is long past its point of interest and we’re just waiting on Mizdow to turn, which would of course take too long to mean anything as WWE would screw it up again. It really is amazing how far the tag division has fallen in just a year as all the injuries and screwiness have turned the division on its head. The Usos are still the Usos though and that’s all that matters.

The pre-show panel chats a bit and we look at the pre-show match.

J&J Security play the new WWE mobile game until Seth Rollins comes in to yell at them for not being serious enough. Rollins says he’s been called the future but he’s the right now.

Wrestlemania ad. I had forgotten how much I hated that theme song.

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

No idea what the story here is but I’m sure it’s Total Divas related. Nikki and Paige get things going with Paige not being able to Irish whip her. It’s off to Natalya who gets two off a kick to the back of the head. Brie comes in to work on the arm as the announcers joke about which twin is older. I’m not sure why this is supposed to be funny but they certainly think it is. A double suplex puts Brie down and Paige does her slow, crawling cover for two.

Natalya comes in and covers as well but for some reason she isn’t legal. Even Paige is confused as she grabs Brie again and now tags Natalya in all legal like. Brie gets two off a quick slam and it’s back to Nikki for a Hennig neck snap. Lawler: “Name two countries and then a state.” Cole: “It was a joke.” It’s as random as it sounds. Now it’s off to Lawler approving of the Bellas’ looks as they take turns on Natalya for some near falls.

Brie puts on a chinlock for a bit before both Bellas grab a leg and roll forward to flip Natalya onto the back of her head. Nikki puts on a headscissors and does push-ups to drive Natalya’s face mere inches away from the mat. Natalya powers up and drops Nikki on her back for the break and avoids a clothesline, only to have Brie pull Paige off the apron. Nikki’s big forearm puts Natalya away at 8:02.

Rating: D. We don’t even have time for a hot tag? This wasn’t much to see but again, it’s all about the Bellas because they’re the stars on Total Divas and know how to act like the Kardashians or whatever. Nikki would get a lot better after another six months on top of the division or so, but that would be a very long six months.

Roman Reigns says he’ll beat his performance from last year.

Stardust does his usual and Goldust says he’s right.

Rusev says he’ll win and promises to crush whoever wins.

Miz says this is his year and Mizdow repeats everything. Again: that’s not what a stunt double does.

Big Show says he’s not mortal because he’s a giant.

Fandango says no one understands the power of the tango.

YES, Daniel Bryan thinks he can get back to the main event of Wrestlemania.

We recap the triple threat for the World Title. Rollins tried to cash in Money in the Bank on Lesnar at Night of Champions while Cena was challenging, triggering a feud between Rollins and Cena. Tonight they both get their shot in what should be awesome.

WWE World Title: John Cena vs. Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and this is one fall to a finish. The fans just explode on Cena with the JOHN CENA SUCKS song making its return. I was there when it debuted and that’s a pure thing of brilliance. Lesnar on the other hand is treated…..well about how you would expect Philadelphia to react to him. Rollins bails to start and there’s the first German suplex to Cena. Another one drops Cena again so J&J come in, only to get a German of their own.

Rollins kicks Cena in the head but gets pulled inside to face Brock all alone. It’s time for more German suplexes and the fans loudly applaud. There’s a regular suplex to Rollins and we get an ECW chant. Brock grabs a Kimura on Cena but John lifts him up, allowing Seth to springboard in with a knee to the champ. Cena and Rollins get smart and double team Lesnar, only to have Seth throw John to the floor for one off an AA.

Brock pops up like a daisy and sends both of them outside, only to have Rollins knock him into the steps. As J&J are in a heap next to the barricade, Cena starts his usual finishing sequence on Rollins but Lesnar breaks up the Shuffle with another German suplex. Seth breaks up the rolling Germans though as he needs Cena to help fight against Brock. Makes sense. A knee to the back puts Brock on the floor but the champ is right back in for the save as Seth covers Cena.

Back up and Cena throws Rollins to the floor and actually drops Brock with some clotheslines. Seth pulls Cena outside and tries a springboard, only to get caught in a big F5. That is some terrifying strength. Brock loads up a table for some reason so Cena gives him three straight AA’s for two with Rollins making a last second save. There’s a Curb Stomp from Seth and this time Cena has to dive in and break up the cover. The fans think this is awesome (indeed) as everyone heads outside, where Cena spears Lesnar through the barricade.

Brock keeps getting up so Cena throws him into the steps and blasts him in the face for good measure, knocking the champ onto the announcers’ table. Rollins feels left out so he drives Brock through with a HUGE top rope elbow and Cena is the only one standing. The non-Lesnars head back inside and Seth hits a quick low superkick for two. The AA doesn’t work so Cena Batista Bombs him for a VERY near fall.

Not to be outdone, Rollins reverses a superplex attempt into a running Buckle Bomb for two more. Both guys are spent so Rollins tries a Curb Stomp, only to get caught in the STF. Cue J&J from their comas for the save as a stretcher comes out for Brock. There’s a TripleBomb for two on Cena but he ducks a briefcase shot and AA’s both J’s at the same time. He should not be able to do that twenty minutes into a match this physical. Or any match for that matter.

Another AA gets two on Rollins and the Curb Stomp gets the same on Cena as the fans are freaking out on these kickouts. We’re told Brock has at least a broken rib as Rollins busts out the Phoenix Splash on Cena. Not that it matters as a TICKED OFF Brock gets back in for some German suplexes, only to have Seth hit him in the face with the briefcase. Rollins loads up a Curb Stomp onto the case but you don’t try that on Lesnar, as he counters with a HUGE F5 to retain at 22:42.

Rating: A. Good grief what a battle. This was the night where Rollins became a star and people knew that he was going to be champion soon. Cena put in his normal amazing performance here as well, but good night Brock looked like a monster. This is the beast that WWE wanted to build up for someone to take down and it worked perfectly here. Just outstanding action here with all three looking like they had been through a war. This was the instant match of the year leader and it would take something special to knock it off.

Brock walks off as the medics are stunned.

Rumble By The Numbers video.

Royal Rumble

Good luck following that. Miz is #1 and R-Truth is #2 with 90 second intervals. They start slowly (smart here) until Truth gets in a few pelvic thrusts. Truth is sent to the apron a few times and gets crotched on the top until Bubba Ray Dudley makes a big surprise return at #3. You think that might wake the Philadelphia fans up a bit? Bubba is fired up to start and gives Miz the Dusty punches before R-Truth plays D-Von (I’m not touching that one) on What’s Up.

Now it’s table time but Miz gets up, only to be put back down with a 3D. There go Miz and Truth as Luke Harper is in at #4 for a hoss fight. They slug it out boo/yay style but Harper elbows out of a Bubba Bomb. A big clothesline drops Harper but Bray Wyatt is in at #5. Bubba isn’t sure what to make of him and Bray does his big freaky smile. The fans want D-Von (fair enough idea) but Bray sends Bubba into a clothesline and dumps him a few seconds later.

Harper and Wyatt stare at each other and Curtis Axel is in at #6, only to have Erick Rowan jump him from behind and destroy him, kicking off Axelmania because Axel was never officially eliminated. Rowan (not part of the Family at this point) gets in and teases a reunion against Bray, only to be quickly double teamed. Erick almost gets Harper out but Bray dumps them both and points to the sign. In another surprise return, the Boogeyman is in at #7. Cole: “It’s the eater of worlds against the eater of worms!” His entrance takes forever and Bray dumps him like the jobber that he is.

Sin Cara is in at #8 and gets in a few shots, only to get punched out of the air. Sister Abigail sets up another elimination and Bray is on a roll. With no one to fight, Bray grabs a mic and issues an open challenge to everyone in the back because this is his year. It’s time to sing until Zack Ryder is in at #9 (apparently returning from shoulder surgery), only to be eliminated even faster than Cara.

NOW things get interesting as Daniel Bryan is in at #10 to one of the loudest reactions you’ll hear since…..well since the last time Bryan was in a big match probably. Daniel speeds things up a lot with some running dropkicks in the corner as JBL tells Bryan not to go so hard because he needs to pace himself. Preach it JBL. A middle rope hurricanrana puts Bray down and it’s Fandango in at #11. Well that’s quite the drop in star power. He goes after Bryan but stops to dance, allowing Bryan to flip out of a belly to back suplex.

We go old school (way old school actually) with an airplane spin until Tyson Kidd (with his sweet theme song) is in at #12. A springboard missile dropkick drops Bryan and Fandango is quickly dropped into the corner, leaving Kidd and Bryan to slug it out in what could rock with about fifteen minutes. Stardust is in at #13, with Cole saying it’s his Rumble debut. No Cole, no it’s not. I get what he’s going for and no Cole, no it’s not.

Fandango and Stardust take turns skinning the cat before Stardust takes out the knee to get Fandango in trouble. Bryan eliminates Kidd but Bray is back up, only to be knocked through the ropes and out to the floor. You know that means a suicide dive from Daniel, followed by Diamond Dallas Page in at #14 for another surprise. Stardust is right on him but there’s the first Diamond Cutter. JBL: “Do they teach that in yoga class?”

Fandango takes Page down but gets crotched on top, setting up a super Diamond Cutter for a very nice pop. Bray pounds on Page but takes a Diamond Cutter of his own, which is one step too far. The guy is a monster and shouldn’t get dropped by a retired legend. Rusev comes in at #15 and superkicks Page before eliminating him. Side note: put Page in the Hall of Fame already. He has the resume and he’s worthy of canonization after what he accomplished with Roberts and Hall.

Rusev dumps Fandango and puts Bryan on the apron, allowing Bray to knock Daniel out. That right there is pretty much it for this Rumble meaning anything as we now know it’s all about Reigns, even though the fans aren’t going to be interested no matter what. I know you can’t have Bryan win here, but you could at least give him a run near the end. This was a bad idea and the DANIEL BRYAN chants starting up a minute after he’s gone don’t bode well for the rest of the show.

Goldust is in at #16, giving us Goldust, Stardust, Rusev and Wyatt. The brothers go after each other for a bit until Kofi Kingston is in at #17. Kofi goes after Bray as the fans are booing everything presented to them no matter how watchable it is. All five wind up in one corner for some reason with no eliminations until Adam Rose is in at #18. The Rosebuds do the full entrance and catch Kofi as he’s launched over the top for his annual save. Rusev dumps Rose with ease and kicks Kofi out a few seconds later to get us back to four. Roman Reigns is in at #19 and oh man this is going to be good.

The fans go nuts on Reigns as he fires off the running corner clotheslines and gets rid of Goldust and Stardust in rapid succession. Big E. is in at #20 and only gets kind of booed. Rusev is right on him and that gets booed loudly out of pure spite. Rusev hits a quick Cannonball on Big E. and it’s Damien Mizdow in at #21 for a bit of relief from the fans. Miz cuts him off and wants the spot but Reigns shoves him down and Damien, egged on by the crowd, goes in as well.

Mizdow cleans some house but is thrown out by Rusev in less than twenty seconds. Dang they really don’t want the fans to cheer anything tonight do they? Well other than Reigns of course. Jack Swagger is in at #22 and gets in a few nice shots until Bray cuts him off. We’ve got Wyatt, Swagger, Reigns, Big E. and Rusev at the moment until Ryback is in at #23. That means more power brawling with Meat Hooks and suplexes all around. Bray and Rusev continue their loose alliance to to get Ryback in trouble and there’s a CM Punk chant for the latest false hope.

Kane is in at #24 and you know the people aren’t happy with that. The match slows down a bit with Kane putting Ryback on the apron and Big E. doing the same thing to Swagger. Those attempts go as far as you would expect and it’s Dean Ambrose in at #25 to give the fans something to actually cheer for. Dean goes for Rusev to start but has to stop a charging Kane. The fans are WAY into Ambrose as he’s the first guy they’ve wanted to cheer for in about fifteen minutes.

Titus O’Neil is in at #26 and put out in four seconds by Ambrose and Reigns. So much for that one. The ring is getting too full and Intercontinental Champion Bad News Barrett makes it even worse at lucky #27. Everyone brawls against the ropes until it’s Cesaro in at #28. Cesaro fires off a bunch of European uppercuts but he can only get Ambrose to the apron. Rusev dropkicks Big E. out to clear a little room but Big Show takes his place at #29.

Everyone goes after him but Show throws them away before starting a chokeslam contest with Kane. There goes Ryback thanks to both giants and Show dumps Swagger. A chokeslam sends Rusev rolling out under the ropes and it’s Dolph Ziggler in at #30 (Remember when “who is #30” was the big question every year? Now it’s just another entrant. It’s kind of sad really.), giving us a final grouping of Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Kane, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro, Big Show and Ziggler.

Here’s the thing: that’s actually a stacked final set of people. Wyatt, Rusev, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro and Ziggler are crowd favorites, Big Show and Kane are at least good monsters to conquer and Reigns is…..well that other group is really popular. The problem here is NO ONE but Reigns has a chance and the entire audience knows it, making this inevitable rather than anything interesting.

Ziggler superkicks the giants and takes them both down with the running DDT. Barrett is sent to the apron and superkicked out but Ziggler gets caught in the Cesaro Swing. Cesaro sends him to the apron but Dolph gets him to the apron for a superkick and an elimination, only to have Big Show and Kane put Ziggler out. That also gives Kane the all time record for Rumble eliminations.

The giants throw Bray out like he’s no one (thanks for the 47 minutes Bray) and the fans are getting even angrier than they already were. So it’s Ambrose/Reigns vs. Big Show/Kane with Rusev forgotten on the floor. Roman is bleeding from the mouth as he clotheslines Show down but he and Dean can’t get rid of the bigger giant. Kane boots Roman in the face and the KO Punch knocks Dean silly, giving the giants an easy elimination. Reigns is suddenly even less popular as the inevitability gets that much closer. Even Cole acknowledges that the fans hate this.

Reigns fights back and the booing gets even louder until Kane and Show start fighting, because the last SIXTEEN YEARS of these two fighting isn’t enough. They fight next to the ropes and Reigns gets up for a double elimination, actually sending the fans into silence for the win.

Kane and Big Show get back in and beat Roman down even more, complete with a double chokeslam. The fans remember that Rusev is still in but here’s the Rock to help save his cousin. He cleans house and drops both giants to a nice reaction until Reigns Superman Punches Show into a Rock Bottom. Rock leaves and Rusev gets back in, only to get speared and eliminated to really give Roman the win at 59:31.

Rating: D-. WOW. This is somehow so much worse than I remember it as WWE was clearly going out of its way to clear the path for Roman but the fans were having none of it. The problem here is a simple one: there was never any drama. Look back at 2012 for a second. The final two were Chris Jericho and Sheamus, neither of whom were interesting choices to win. However, the final three minutes of that match are AWESOME as you really didn’t know who was going to win and both guys had a real chance. That’s the easiest way to get fans to like the Rumble, or really most matches.

This Rumble is really more like 1993 than anything else. That was the year of Yokozuna and everyone knew it, though there was the slightest chance of the Undertaker winning it. However, Undertaker went out in the middle of the match and the rest was just a waiting game to see who was on Yokozuna’s victim list.

That’s exactly what happened here. Everyone knew Reigns was the heavy favorite no matter who they wanted to win and the ONLY person with a real chance of beating him was Bryan. This year Bryan was the twelfth man eliminated, leaving about thirty five minutes left in the match. That’s a long time for the fans to sit around with little to no hope as things get worse and worse. The best false hope they had for the rest of the match was Ambrose and that just wasn’t going to happen.

On top of that, you have Big Show and Kane as the big bads for Reigns to conquer. That’s fine on paper, until you look at all the papers labeled “Raw Results” where you see how many times he and everyone else has beaten both of them. Instead of some group of the popular guys at the end, it was Kane and Big Show for the first ending. Then there’s Rusev for the false hope spot but Reigns destroyed him too before winning.

So yeah, this was one big mess all designed for Reigns to look like a hero and it failed miserably. It boils down to a simple concept that actually takes me back to the Russo days to a degree: you have to earn it. The problem here is Reigns hasn’t really accomplished anything to earn this spot and the fans are rejecting him. Austin dominating the 1998 Rumble worked because the fans had seen Austin go through a lot of wars to earn the right to be the top dog. Reigns’ big moment was a win over Randy Orton at Summerslam 2014. That’s not exactly huge and the fans hadn’t forgotten.

Ignoring the Reigns part for a minute, this was a really dull match. Bubba was a cool surprise and Page was good for a Diamond Cutter, but Boogeyman? Other than that and Bray’s dominance (which went nowhere), this was really dull stuff. Kofi being caught by the Rosebuds was a good quick chuckle but really low on his list of saves. Just a horrible Rumble from start to finish with only a few bright spots throughout.

Rock poses with Reigns and the fans STILL boo. The Authority comes out to glare a lot as Reigns celebrates and points at the sign to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Oh yeah this was bad. The triple threat is the only thing keeping this from being a disaster as the rest of the card is a bunch of nothing tags and then a disaster of a Rumble for the last third. The Rumble itself really is that bad and drags an already bad show down even lower. It’s balanced out a bit by the triple threat but twenty two minutes of awesome can’t make up for an hour of horrible. Terrible show here and thankfully WWE finally figured out that Reigns wasn’t ready yet, because he just wasn’t here.

Ratings Comparison

Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. New Day

Original: B

Redo: B-

Ascension vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Usos

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

Original: D-

Redo: D

Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Original: A

Redo: A

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: D

How in the world did I add that one up last year?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/01/25/royal-rumble-2015-more-teasing-than-a-15-year-old-on-prom-night/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Royal Rumble 2015
Date: January 25, 2015
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the start of the Road to Wrestlemania and the top two contenders to challenge for the title at the biggest show of the year are Roman Reigns and Daniel Bryan. Both are in the Royal Rumble match tonight and there really isn’t another major favorite to win. Other than that we have John Cena and Seth Rollins challenging Brock Lesnar for the WWE World Title in a triple threat. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: New Day vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

This was originally a six man elimination tag with Adam Rose and Xavier Woods added. They may have been dropped due to Woods’ ankle injury. The fans are entirely behind Cesaro to start as Big E. throws Kidd around. Some backbreakers get two on Kidd before Big E. launches Kidd into the air for a dropkick from Kofi. Off to Cesaro and the fans are thrilled. Big E. comes back in and hammers away on Cesaro, much to the crowd’s chagrin. Oh yeah they’re white hot tonight.

Kofi is dragged into the wrong corner for a double stomp with Kidd going much faster than his partner. Cesaro won’t let Kofi tag but he does roll the Swiss man up for two. The Cesaro Swing into the dropkick gets two and we take a break. Back with Cesaro holding Kofi in a chinlock as the fans think New Day sucks. Big E. gets all fired up and wipes the sweat from his brow before slamming Cesaro down for two. Kidd is sent outside and Big E. launches Kofi onto him to almost no reaction. Big E. spears Cesaro through the ropes and off the apron to the floor. I miss that spot. Or any Big E. spot actually.

The referee doesn’t see a tag to Kofi at first but Cesaro backdrops Big E. over the top for a big crash. Cesaro superplexes Kofi for a springboard elbow from Kidd for a very close two. Kofi kicks Kidd to the floor to break up a Sharpshooter attempt but Cesaro gets caught cheating on a sunset flip attempt. Trouble in Paradise is countered into the Sharpshooter on Kofi but Big E. makes the save with a belly to belly. Cesaro knocks the big man to the floor and pops Kofi in the face with a European uppercut, setting up a swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin on Kofi at 11:00.

Rating: B. This got a lot better near the end but the match and commentary really tells you everything you need to know about the tag division at this point. With that one win, after about five losses, JBL thinks Cesaro and Kidd are in line for a title shot. Have we really sunk that low again? Win two matches and you should be the Tag Team Champions? Yet people still don’t want Ascension around? The near falls here were good and I wasn’t sure who was winning until the end, but that’s the first loss for New Day? Really?

The opening video talks about wanting to have your moment and being the one. We transition into a video on the triple threat and how everyone is fighting for the title.

New Age Outlaws vs. Ascension

Ascension needs some steps to come down during their entrance. Cole points out that this isn’t for the Tag Team Titles. That could be because neither team is champions. The fans think Billy still has it as he armdrags Viktor down. Off to Dogg vs. Konnor with the big man driving Dogg into the corner. Viktor’s chinlock doesn’t have much effect so it’s off to Konnor for one of his own. Dogg finally gets up and dives over for the tag to Billy as everything speeds up. The Fameasser misses though and Fall of Man ends Gunn at 5:23.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what it was supposed to be as they’re setting up Ascension against various legendary teams, meaning we’re likely to see Too Cool and maybe the APA laying down for them in the future, setting up the title showdown against Ascension. Granted it’s not like beating the New Age Outlaws means much at this point.

We recap Sting debuting on Raw and staring down the Authority, allowing Cena to pin Rollins to save his spot in the title match tonight and get Dolph Ziggler, Erick Rowan and Ryback their jobs back.

HHH and Stephanie are annoyed that they weren’t told about Sting debuting. If he walks in here again, HHH is going to destroy him. Heyman comes in and the ECW chants begin. His solution to the Sting problem: Brock Lesnar.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

The Usos are defending and these teams have been trading the titles for the last few months. Mizdow is just ridiculously over. Miz shoves Jimmy into the corner but eats a shot to the face. The corner clothesline puts Jey down but he’s able to crotch Miz on the top. Mizdow does the same but in slow motion for a funny bit. He one ups it by diving into an invisible punch to the ribs before Miz throws Jimmy throat first into the ropes. The Reality Check gets two but Miz still won’t tag out.

The not very hot tag brings in Jey but Miz takes him down for the figure four as everything breaks down. Miz and Mizdow head outside and Jimmy dives on Mizdown with Jey taking out Miz a few seconds later. Back in and Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale for two on Jimmy. Jey comes back in for a double superkick and the Superfly Splash but Mizdow makes the save. He follows it up with the Skull Crushing Finale to give Miz two on Jey. Miz’s superplex attempt is broken up for a sunset bomb from Jey, followed by the Superfly Splash from Jimmy to retain at 8:22. Mizdow didn’t seem interested in making the save.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here as these teams have run out of things to do to each other. Miz and Mizdow’s split seems imminent and I can’t imagine they make it out of the Rumble without a major showdown. It wasn’t a great match though and they would have been better off with this on the pre-show and the New Day vs. Kidd/Cesaro on the main show.

The expert panel (Booker T., Corey Graves and Alex Riley) talk about the show so far.

We look at the pre-show match.

The Stooges are playing the new WWE Immortals game when Seth Rollins comes in to ask why they’re not helping him get ready. He’s tired of being called the future and wants to be the present.

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

This is the Total Divas match over who are the real stars of the show. Paige throws Nikki down to start as JBL says the Bellas have been twins their whole life. Off to Brie who walks into a double suplex, allowing the slow crawling cover from Paige. Natalya comes back in and slams Brie down before the Bellas start choking to take over.

The Brie Mode running knee to the chest gets two but Natalya fights out of a headscissors by lifting Nikki into an electric chair. Nikki misses a clothesline in the corner but Brie breaks up the hot tag to Paige. A big forearm to Natalya’s jaw is enough for the pin at 8:06 to end this far too long match.

Rating: D-. Oh come on now. A FOREARM??? They can’t even have Nikki hit her finisher for the pin? If you’re going to have Nikki pin Natalya, at least make this a title match. Oh wait that would be stupid because we’ve seen that match like 19 times now. Again, stop running through matches and save them for shows like this.

Roman Reigns says last year’s elimination record was cool but it’s nothing compared to this.

Stardust talks about the Cosmic Key and Goldust breathes a lot.

Rusev will crush everyone at Wrestlemania.

Miz says he’ll win and Mizdow agrees, but accidentally says he’ll win instead.

Big Show says he’s an angry and motivated giant. Roman Reigns and everyone else in the match will find that out for real.

Fandango says everyone underestimates the power of the tango.

Daniel Bryan thinks he can make it back to the main event of Wrestlemania this year. YES he does.

We recap Lesnar vs. Cena vs. Rollins. Cena had defeated Orton to earn a title shot against Lesnar but the Authority added Rollins to the match to thank him for bringing them back. Rollins has started to stand up to Lesnar and even Curb Stomped him, meaning Lesnar wants to kill him too.

WWE World Heavyweight Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Lesnar is defending and we get big match intros. Rollins immediately bails to the floor and Lesnar hits the first German suplex on Cena. There’s the second German as Rollins comes in, only to get caught on Brock’s shoulders. The Stooges make the save so Brock suplexes them at the same time. Brock launches Seth back into the ring and Germans Cena again. All Lesnar so far.

Both challengers are easily suplexed again and there’s the Kimura to Cena. Brock even climbs onto Cena but Seth makes the save with the springboard knee to the head and Lesnar is in trouble. A double suplex puts Lesnar down and there’s an AA but Rollins throws Cena to the floor and only gets one on the champ. Both challengers are thrown to the floor and you can see everyone laying as Brock walks around the ring. Seth knocks Brock into the steps for a breather, leaving Cena to beat Rollins up inside.

The fans absolutely hate Cena, only to have Brock break up the Shuffle with rolling Germans. Rollins breaks it up for some reason though and knees Lesnar out to the floor. Now it’s Cena getting all fired up and cleaning house, only to have Rollins knock him outside. Seth tries a springboard onto Lesnar, only to get caught on Brock’s shoulders for an F5. John has to make a save so Brock feels the need to throw him down with another German suplex.

That’s not enough for Brock though as he loads up the announcers’ table (and destroys a monitor), only to walk into the AA. Brock doesn’t even stay down so Cena hits another, only to have Lesnar pop up again. A third AA gets two as Rollins makes the save, followed by the Curb Stomp for two with Cena making a save. Now the fans are impressed. Lesnar throws them both down again and goes outside, only to have Cena follow him out and spear the champ through the barricade.

Cena slams him hard into the steps and blasts him in the face with the same steps, knocking the champ onto the announcers’ table. Seth kicks Cena down and goes up for a top rope elbow through the table to put everyone down. That was one heck of a crash as the war continues. Back in and Rollins hits the low superkick for two on Cena but John grabs a popup sitout powerbomb for the same. Lesnar is receiving medical attention as Rollins counters a superplex attempt into the running buckle bomb for two.

Everyone is down again but Cena grabs the STF, only to have the Stooges come in for the save. Rollins plays Reigns in a Triple Bomb as a stretcher comes out for Lesnar. Cena kicks out at two so Rollins grabs the briefcase, only to miss the charge and fly out to the floor. The Stooges take a double AA and Rollins gets the single version but kicks out at two. We cut back to Lesnar who says he wants to stay out here. Cole says Lesnar has at least a broken rib. Rollins enziguris Cena down and the Curb Stomp connects for another near fall.

Rollins busts out a Phoenix Splash but Lesnar CHARGES back in for some German suplexes as Beast Mode is on. Seth flips out of a German though and knocks Lesnar silly with the briefcase, only to have Lesnar pop up with an F5 to counter the Curb Stomp onto the briefcase to retain the title at 22:45.

Rating: A. If there’s one thing WWE can do like no one else, it’s organized carnage. These guys DESTROYED each other for twenty two minutes and I would have believed anyone could have won at any time. Lesnar going into that other level is absolutely terrifying and you believe he could beat anyone at that point. Great stuff here and well worth going out of your way to see. They’re making Lesnar out to be unstoppable, meaning whoever gets to take the title off of him will be a huge star. You might even say they’ll be Reign(s)ing. And yes that was as stupid as it sounded.

Rumble by the numbers.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and it’s Miz at #1 and R-Truth at #2. The fans immediately want Mizdow but get a headlock from R-Truth instead. Feeling out process to start until Truth gets crotched on top. In at #3 is BUBBA RAY DUDLEY, complete with taped up glasses. It’s Miz getting the big beating and the wind-up elbow has Miz reeling. Truth (appropriately) helps with What’s Up and is even told to get the tables. You know the Philadelphia crowd is up for that. Miz gets back up and eats 3D, allowing Bubba to easily eliminate him.

Luke Harper is in at #4 as Bubba throws out Truth. They immediately start hammering on each other and Harper fights out of the Bubba Bomb before kicking Bubba in the jaw. A big lariat puts Harper down though and the ECW chants revive Dudley. Bray Wyatt is in at #5, complete with lantern. Bubba stares him down but Harper gives us a Wyatt Family reunion as the fans want D-Von. Harper throws Bubba out and it’s time for the big staredown.

They stand in place until Curtis Axel is in at #6 but Erick Rowan (who didn’t qualify for the Rumble) jumps him from behind though and whips him into the barricade, apparently stealing Axel’s spot. Harper looks at Rowan and wants a team up, much to Bray’s excitement. Bray and Harper join forces though and Rowan gets double teamed, only to have Bray dump both of them out to clear the ring.

The Boogeyman returns at #7 and Cole informs us that the guy coming out to I’M THE BOOGEYMAN is in fact named the Boogeyman. Bray smiles at him and stops a charge with a big clothesline, setting up the easy elimination. Sin Cara is in at #8 and Cole sounds bored out of his mind. Cara gets in a kick from the apron but Bray just decks him with a right hand. Sister Abigail connects and Bray is all alone again a few seconds later.

Bray grabs the mic and issues an open invitation because he has the whole world in his hands. Zack Ryder returns at #9, hits the Broski Boot, and is quickly Bray’s fifth elimination. Daniel Bryan is in at #10 to really pick things up. He immediately starts the kicks and has Bray in trouble in the corner. Even more kicks put him down as Fandango is in at #11. Bryan busts out even more kicks and an old school airplane spin but doesn’t throw Fandango out.

Tyson Kidd (complete with his addictive theme song) is in at #12 to slug it out with Bryan before a double cross body puts both guys down. Stardust is in at #13 as we’re firmly in the midcard portion. Cole says this is Stardust’s first Rumble to split a few hairs. We currently have Wyatt, Bryan, Stardust, Fandango and Kidd in the ring. Stardust and Fandango trade skinning the cat saves before Bryan belly to back suplexes Kidd out.

Bray gets knocked through the middle rope and Bryan follows with the Flying Goat, meaning both guys are still in as Diamond Dallas Page is in at #14. Stardust jumps him upon entry but eats a Diamond Cutter. Fandango takes the middle rope version, followed by Wyatt missing a charge and taking one of his own. Rusev is in at #15 and it’s time to clear out some space. He blocks a Diamond Cutter and dumps Page and Fandango, setting up a showdown between Rusev and Wyatt.

Daniel breaks it up with a top rope dropkick and unleashes more kicks, only to have Bray pop up and dump him out far earlier than I was expecting. Goldust is in at #16 as the crowd is just dead. Stardust tries to throw out Goldust (with Cole mentioning that Goldust was eliminated by his brother last year, despite saying Stardust was in his first Rumble. Like I said, splitting hairs) but Goldust saves himself. The fans start chanting for Bryan and them switch to booing.

Kofi Kingston is in at #17, giving us Kingston, Goldust, Stardust, Rusev and Wyatt. Bray catapults him over the top but Kofi skins the cat and comes back in with a springboard shot to the head. Everyone gets into one corner until Adam Rose is in at #18. You can hear every word of the songs now as the crowd just does not care at the moment. Kofi is thrown out but the Rosebuds catch him and walk him back to the apron. Rusev dumps Rose and Kofi a few seconds later and Roman Reigns is in at #19 to a lot less booing than I was expecting.

Roman starts cleaning house and dumps both Dust Brothers, only to get double teamed by Rusev and Wyatt. Big E. is in at #20 to clean house and give us a very powerful foursome of Big E., Rusev, Wyatt and Reigns. Mizdow is in at #21 but Miz runs out to say it’s his spot. Damien finally stands up to Miz and goes in to a good reaction, only to be dumped by Rusev. Jack Swagger is in at #22 and everyone keeps brawling until Ryback is in at #23.

Ryback busts out everyone with spinebusters as JBL incorrectly says Lex Luger is the only man to win the Rumble but never win the WWE Title (Duggan). The fans chant for CM Punk but get Kane at #24, giving us Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Big E., Swagger, Ryback and Kane. Dean Ambrose wakes the crowd up again at #25 and goes right for Wyatt. We get more brawling around the ropes until Titus O’Neil is in at #26 and is dumped in about thirty seconds (counting intro) by Reigns and Rusev.

Ambrose dropkicks Wyatt up against the ropes and Bad News Barrett gets lucky #27. The ring is getting full but no one is in any real danger of being eliminated. Cesaro is in at #28 and joins the fray. Rusev sends Big E. to the apron and then kicks him out to clear the ring a bit. Big Show is in at #29 and everyone stops to stare him down. They all gang up on him but Show shoves everyone down as Kane chokeslams Ambrose. Show does the same to Reigns before the monsters dump Ryback with ease.

Swagger is dumped by the power team as well, tying Kane for the all time record at 39 eliminations. Dolph Ziggler is in at #30, giving us a final group of Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Kane, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro, Big Show and Ziggler. Dolph has to fight out of the chokeslam from Big Show and dumps Barrett. Cesaro swings Dolph around and gets him to the apron, only to be pulled out for the elimination. Ziggler goes up top and dives right into the KO Punch, allowing Kane and Show to easily dump him, giving Kane the all time eliminations record.

Big Show KO’s Wyatt and dumps him as well, leaving us with Ambrose, Reigns, Big Show and Kane as the final four. Reigns is bleeding from the side of the mouth as the brawl is on. The Shield fights out of a double chokeslam but Ambrose’s rebound clothesline has almost no effect on Show. Reigns knocks Show down and the fans just are not happy. Big Show and Kane double team Roman though before a chokeslam is enough to get rid of Ambrose.

So it’s Kane and Big Show vs. Reigns and the fans are LIVID. Reigns gets sent to the apron but Show tries to dump Kane, triggering a fight that has been going on for over fifteen years now. Reigns sneaks up from behind them and eliminates both guys to go to Wrestlemania at 57:23.

Rating: D+. I’m surprised by this but I really shouldn’t be. They actually went with Reigns vs. the giants to end the Royal Rumble? This match felt like a big tease from the company as they were setting up Wyatt, Cesaro, Rusev, Ambrose and Ziggler for this big showdown but then snatched it away to go with Kane and Big Show as the big monsters. That’s really what they think is the smart idea? And you know we’re getting Reigns vs. Big Show at Fast Lane, probably without Big Show doing a job for him because he doesn’t get pinned you see.

As for the rest of the match…..yeah I liked it, but man alive it was obvious where they were going with about twenty minutes to go. Bryan going out that early is a waste, though I’m fine with him not winning it. He had his big moment last year and it would be foolish to try and recreate it. Bryan can get the title later on in his other big moment and that’s all he needs to do.

The returns were fine but there was no big surprise at the end (that’s fine), and Reigns was just so obvious as a winner. Also, the commentary was getting REALLY annoying with all their stats, some of which just didn’t make sense. I didn’t hate this match, but Reigns is getting wedged into a spot he’s just not ready for whatsoever. Wrestlemania better have an amazing undercard, because Reigns vs. Lesnar is not going to cut it on top.

Post match Kane and Big Show destroy Reigns until The Rock makes a surprise run in for the save. House is cleaned but Rusev is back in! He was never officially elimianted…..so Reigns throws him out to officially win about three minutes after he won in the first place. Again, more teasing.

The Authority comes out as Rock poses with Reigns before letting Reigns point at the sign to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This could have been far worse and the Rumble isn’t even very bad, but good grief it felt like they looked at all the cool possibilities they had here and ran away from them as fast as they could to go with the status quo. The World Title match more than saves the show and the Rumble has its moments (some of them at least), but that last ten minutes or so just crippled anything they possibly had out of this match. I actually liked last year’s Rumble better if you can believe that. Just……stop deciding your outcome before you think for two seconds WWE. It would make your fans so much happier.

I’m not even mad at this ending. It’s just…there. WWE decided months ago that Reigns was going to be the guy because of whatever reasons they have and that’s what we’re getting, no matter what else is out there. It’s very dull when you know what’s coming and there’s nothing you can do about it. I can live with that when there’s no better option, but there are indeed better, or at least far more interesting and prepared options, than Reigns here.

Results

Ascension b. New Age Outlaws – Fall of Man to Gunn

Usos b. Miz/Damien Mizdow – Superfly Splash to Miz

Bella Twins b. Paige/Natalya – Forearm to the face

Brock Lesnar b. Seth Rollins and John Cena – F5 to Rollins

Roman Reigns won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Big Show and Kane

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Fusion #118
Date: January 20, 2021
Location: Gilt Nightclub, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Rich Bocchini, Jared St. Laurent

We’re back to normal this week after Salina de la Renta was in charge last week, but the interesting note came at the end of last week’s show. De la Renta’s Promociones Dorado seems to have been bought out by some group called Azteca Underground, which seems to be some continuation of Lucha Underground. That certainly gets my interest so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

ACH is challenging for the World Title tonight but has been attacked outside of the gym. The match is still on.

Opening sequence.

Zenshi vs. Daivari

Daivari is the newest Contra soldier and is in outstanding shape. Feeling out process to start until Daivari nails a running clothesline for an early two. There’s a backdrop out of the corner for the same and the armbar has Zenshi in more trouble. A hammerlock slam gets two more and the armbar goes on. Zenshi is sent outside but comes back in with some rams into the buckles. A slingshot neckbreaker gets two (with one arm) but a bottom rope 450 hits knees. Daivari grabs a hammerlock lariat for the pin at 6:11.

Rating: C-. This was designed to make Daivari look good and it did that well enough. Taking apart the arm was a bit of a twist on the normal setup but it went as well as could have been expected. I haven’t been much of a Daivari fan over the years but he looked crisp here and the physique is a marked changed from his WWE days, so well done on putting in a lot of work.

Myron Reed isn’t scared of Contra and wants some of Daivari.

Savio Vega looks at a picture of himself and promises to get the Caribbean belt back from Richard Holliday in a strap match. Vega will even provide the strap, which is the same one he used on Steve Austin. The contract is in the mail.

Jordan Oliver vs. Simon Gotch

Gotch wins an early slugout without too much trouble but Oliver is right back with more forearms of his own. That earns him a Saito suplex so Oliver grabs a waistlock into a snap suplex. They head outside with Contra hitting a kick to the back and adds an elbow drop from the apron.

Back in and some chops in the corner put Oliver on the floor, followed by an enziguri for two back inside. An armbar sends Oliver straight to the rope as Gotch seems to be toying with him. Oliver finally gets in a running knee to the chest for two and a big boot gets the same. That’s about it for Oliver though as his springboard is pulled into a sleeper to give Gotch the win at 7:28.

Rating: C. This wasn’t much of a competitive match but it told a story. The big appeal here was that Oliver was angry at Gotch for what he did to his friend and Gotch, being the more trained and experienced fighter, knew how to keep his cool and reel the overzealous Oliver in. That’s a simple story but it was all you needed here and Gotch played it as well as could be asked.

Post match Gotch lays him out with a piledriver for a bonus. Myron Reed runs in for the save.

We look back at Los Parks winning the Tag Team Titles last week.

Tom Lawlor and Team Filthy denies all allegations against them from last week’s title change. They don’t have any idea who attacked ACH this morning either, though pronouncing his name like a sound instead of the letters is funny.

Video on ACH.

Salina de la Renta isn’t having any of these questions about Promociones Dorado so Alicia Atout goes on a mini rant about how ridiculous Salina is for never answering anything. Alicia is going to find out what’s going on.

Mads Krugger knows that he will end Alex Hammerstone when they meet again in two week.

ACH has said that Team Filthy’s Dominic Garrini attacked him this morning.

Richard Holliday joins us from Martha’s Vineyard and says he has signed the contract to face Savio Vega against his lawyer/father’s advice because he is 12 steps ahead of Vega.

MLW World Title: ACH vs. Jacob Fatu

ACH is challenging and is rather banged up coming in. Daivari is here with Fatu to keep things unfair. ACH charges at him to start and gets knocked into the corner with ease. Some backflips allow ACH to dropkick the champ outside but the dive is knocked out of the air. There’s a ribs first drop onto the apron and Fatu sits down on the ribs back inside. Another drop misses though and ACH strikes away, only to get pulled into a Samoan drop.

Fatu drops down onto the ribs again as the game plan isn’t exactly complicated here (as it shouldn’t be). The running hip attack misses but ACH’s rather dumb slam attempt comes crashing down. Fatu grabs a neck crank and there’s a headbutt to put ACH back down. A missed charge into the corner puts Fatu down for a bit though and ACH gets to strike away.

ACH dropkicks the knee out and hits a basement dropkick to the side of the head (which shouldn’t work on a Samoan). There’s a slingshot cutter (which Fatu sells like a DDT) for two and a hurricanrana sets up an enziguri. For some reason ACH tries the slam again, this time earning himself a pop up Samoan drop. The moonsault finishes ACH at 9:52.

Rating: C+. They didn’t bother making Fatu sweat here and they shouldn’t have. ACH is a bigger star outside of MLW but it isn’t like he has done much of anything around here in the first place. Fatu is an absolute monster and doesn’t need to be in anything resembling danger outside of a major challenger. ACH is good, but he isn’t that good, at least around here.

Post match Fatu and Daivari proclaim Contra’s dominance but the flag bearers jump them, revealing themselves to be Injustice to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The main event was the best part of the show but the main thing about this week continues to be how much they can do with so little. There were very few people on this show who feel like stars but they managed to make a decent show out of an episode featuring Simon Gotch, Daivari and ACH. As usual, it’s all about the presentation and now they are making it work.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs

https://wrestlingrumors.net/derekstoughton/breaking-news-wwe-network-moving-exclusively-nbcs-peacock/

For a billion dollars.  Basically the Network itself will be shut down and everything is going over to Peacock in March.  From what I can tell, you’ll be getting the same thing plus Peacock for the same price, or the Network with ads plus Peacock for half the regular price.  It doesn’t change outside of the US.

In other words: WWE continues to find a way to make a fortune without doing anything but signing away rights.  That’s why they’re #1 and have been for a really long time: their wrestling content itself may be bad, but they know how to make a whole lot of money.

These are the ones you remember. There are so many angles and stories that take place over the course of the year that it is natural to have something stand out as worse than others. WWE tends to have a corner on the market for these things but there are always a few others that sneak through. That may be the case again this year, but you never can tell. Let’s get to it.

As usual, in no particular order until the winner at the end.

Raw Underground

I’m not sure how terrible this was, but it was so random and came and went so suddenly that I think it warrants an inclusion. Above all else, it was barely used and didn’t really advance anything, so I’d call it more lame than bad. That being said, I’m rarely a fan of something along the lines of “this is the REAL fighting” on a wrestling show and while it was far from the Brawl For All, it wasn’t exactly great.

Retribution

It bothers me to have to put this one on here but it was such a pathetic story for so long that it’s hard not to. I like most of the people involved and I was really glad to see Ali get something to do, but egads how worthless did this team seem for so long? They’re getting better now, albeit at such a low level that it’s hard to make myself care. T-Bar had some amazing moments in NXT and Ali is one of the easiest people to cheer for in WWE today. Why is this the best they can do for them?

Viking Profits

Now I know this one was popular with some fans and that’s fine enough. I did like pieces of it but the whole thing went on for SO long without actually having a match that it felt more like a badly scripted reality series (The Raiders can play basketball but get confused by various common modern references?) than anything else. The cinematic deal with the ninjas and various Marvel/Star Wars references was entertaining, but (and yes this is the old school traditionalist in me), when you advertise a match after weeks/months of buildup, I’d kind of like to see it happen rather than another wacky skit.

Goldberg Returns, Wins Universal Title

So this one was the most infuriating at the time, especially when it was designed to set up the Battle Of The Spears at Wrestlemania, but Goldberg was in the ring less than ten minutes. We’re long past the point where WWE is going to care about how annoyed fans get at Goldberg, so you just kind of learn to live with it. Annoying yes, but at least Goldberg was gone at Wrestlemania, never to be seen…..never mind.

Then there is this, which is worse for one reason.

Braun Strowman vs. Bray Wyatt

As I saw pointed out on SCF, this went on for THREE MONTHS with three pay per view matches, including Money in the Bank and whatever the Swamp Fight was. WWE seemed to think that Strowman was interesting enough to carry half of this feud and oh sweet goodness no. This clinched the worst as soon as you realized that they were going to a third pay per view no matter what. Strowman isn’t very good in the first place (at least not in situations like this) and then he feuded with Wyatt for three pay per views because he was an enforcer for the Wyatt Family (one of three). This just kept going and that’s enough to be the worst.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs