IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2008
Date: November 23, 2008
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 12,498
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Jim Ross, Tazz

The other major story on the show is Team Orton vs. Team Batista. Randy Orton vs. Batista had always been a match WWE wanted to push on a big stage but this is about as high as they ever got. They would face each other at various other pay per views in singles matches, but none as high profile as this one. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is the exact same thing it’s been for two years. Literally, they’re the same clips before we get to the stuff about the main events.

JR and Taz talk about the Hardy issue and say that ABC and TMZ picked up the story. I seem to remember that being a lie.

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

Shawn Michaels, Rey Mysterio, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali

John Bradshaw Layfield, The Miz, John Morrison, Kane, MVP

Shawn and JBL are feuding over Shawn being broke and needing money form JBL, Cryme Tyme (Shad Gaspard and JTG, two thug characters) are feuding with Miz and Morrison, Kane has been hunting Mysterio and Khali and MVP (in the middle of a massive losing streak that would result in a face turn and the US Title) are there to fill out the lineups. MVP and Mysterio get things going as all of the commentators are talking at once.

Rey hits a quick hurricanrana and a clothesline for two before it’s off to JTG for a double dropkick. JTG hits a HARD right hand but MVP gets in a shot to the ribs and hits the Drive-By (running kick to the side of the head) for the elimination. Khali immediately comes in and chops MVP in the head for the elimination to tie things up.

Kane comes in for the staredown of the giants and Khali clotheslines him down with ease. Khali slugs him down and easily breaks up a chokeslam attempt. There’s the chop to the head and Rey climbs on Khali’s shoulders for the splash and another elimination. Off to Morrison who speeds things up. Mysterio hits a quick kick to the head and it’s time for Shad.

Now Cryme Tyme vs. Miz/Morrison was a feud ahead of its time: their internet shows got in an argument and a wrestling feud followed. Shad misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Miz. Since Miz isn’t quite the worker he is at this point, it’s back to Morrison very quickly. Shad runs over both members of the tag team and powerslams Miz down before hitting another overhyped elbow. Miz pops back up and hits the Reality Check (backbreaker/neckbreaker combo) to eliminate Shad.

It’s off to Shawn who comes in via a slow, dramatic step. He gets to face the Miz, meaning that entrance was wasted. To the shock of almost everyone, Miz takes over and double teams with Morrison to work over Shawn’s back. JBL, the slimmed down version, comes in to pound away and drop an elbow for two. Back to Miz who pounds away at Shawn’s bad eye, busting it open again.

Morrison comes in again to crank on a headlock and send Shawn over the top. Naturally Shawn skins the cat to come back in, as he has for years. At least Morrison jumps him when Shawn gets back inside. A forearm puts Shawn down and Morrison nips up in a little jab at HBK. Morrison misses the top rope elbow and it’s a double tag to bring in Miz vs. Mysterio. Rey hits a springboard hurricanrana into the 619 and the top rope splash puts Miz out.

JBL comes in and hits a hard shoulder to take Mysterio down. The crowd is WAY into Rey here. The fans think JBL can’t wrestle. Off to Morrison with a European uppercut followed by a backbreaker. Rey gets in a kick to the face but it’s off to JBL to hook an abdominal stretch with the leg being cranked on at the same time. Once Rey escapes, JBL uses something you don’t often see: a big boot to the back of the head. Rey blocks a belly to back superplex and hits a moonsault press to put JBL down and bust open his lip. There’s the tag to Shawn who hits the forearm and nip up of his own to send Bradshaw to the floor.

Shawn dives out to take Bradshaw out and loads up the superkick to send JBL running away. With JBL running away from the kick, Shawn slides back in and beats the count by one second, meaning JBL is gone via a countout. Morrison tries to superkick Shawn but Shawn is like boy these boots are older than you and kicks Morrison’s head off for the final pin and 3-0 victory.

Rating: C. This was fine but the ending was kind of anti-climatic. They were trying to save the Shawn pin over JBL which was a good idea as they would have a solid feud in the next few months which resulted in Shawn being JBL’s lackey because Shawn was poor. The guys other than the captains in this didn’t do much of note but that’s kind of the idea behind a match like this. Not bad but nothing great either.

HHH doesn’t think he needs to give his opinion on the Jeff Hardy situation. Either way, Hardy will be back. Tonight it’s going to be him vs. Kozlov and HHH promises to give the Russian his first defeat.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, Candice Michelle, Jillian Hall

Smackdown: Michelle McCool, Victoria, Maria, Maryse, Natalya

Candice is a model who wasn’t horrible in the ring, Maryse is a French Canadian bombshell and Natalya is a member of the Hart Family. Beth is the captain of Team Raw (and is dating Santino Marella) and McCool is captain of Team Smackdown. They’re also Women’s and Divas Champions respectively. For the sake of simplicity, only Michelle McCool will be referred to as Michelle. Beth and Michelle start things off with Beth controlling via a top wristlock. Michelle uses some decent chain wrestling to set up a dropkick to send Beth backwards a bit.

Maryse tags herself in and gets in a brawl with her own partner Michelle. Team Raw: “LET THEM FIGHT!” Good thinking. After the brawl is broken up, it’s Beth vs. Maria with Maria avoiding a charge and hitting a slow motion headscissors. Off to Kelly vs. Maria and hopefully this doesn’t last long. Victoria tags herself in and gets caught in a hurricanrana by Kelly for the pin. Kelly tries the same thing on Maryse for two so Maryse hits a backbreaker and gets the pin as well.

It’s 4-4 now and Mickie comes in while swearing a bit. A Thesz Press puts Maryse down and it’s off to Michelle again. They try to bridge into a backslide, fail miserably, and try again to a standoff. McCool hits a Russian legsweep for two and Mickie hits a clothesline for the same. Maria’s save hits McCool by mistake, allowing Mickie to hit the jumping DDT and pin Michelle. Mickie gets in an argument with Beth and gets rolled up by Maryse to tie it right back up.

Off to Candice vs. Natalya and they trade some rollups for two. Natalya busts out a Sharpshooter (it is the Survivor Series after all) but Jillian makes the save. Candice hits a spear for a quick pin on Natalya and it’s 3-2 with Jillian, Beth and Candice vs. Maria and Maryse.

It’s Jillian vs. Maria with Jillian getting two off a Samoan Drop. Maria grabs a quick victory roll to eliminate Jillian and ten seconds later, Candice hits a northern lights suplex to put Maria out. Maryse hooks an inverted figure four on Candice and we’re down to one on one. Maryse gets in a few shots and a rollup but the Glam Slam (double chickenwing slam) gives Beth the final pin very quickly.

Rating: D. As decent as last year’s was, this felt like your traditional Divas match. You had some decent workers but most of the girls are models who are there because of how they look in swimsuits. I’ve seen worse matches and the right choice was the survivor, but this just didn’t work for the most part.

Matt Hardy says that Jeff was hit in the back of the head with a blunt object, ending any drug speculation.

We recap Undertaker vs. Big Show. Show isn’t scared of Undertaker so he’ll win the casket match tonight.

Undertaker vs. Big Show

Casket match and the casket gets the full druid entrance. I wonder if those guys hang out at catering after this. They have a nice casket this year too instead of the normally generic ones. Show took all of 2007 off and lost a ton of weight so he’s still kind of slim here. Well slim for him that is. I don’t think the bell rang but Show starts throwing punches anyway. One misses though and Undertaker tries to dump him into the casket to no avail.

They head to the floor and Undertaker’s headbutt has no effect. Show pounds away at the ribs and rams Undertaker face first into the announce table to daze the smaller giant. The announce table gets loaded up but Show headbutts him instead of putting Undertaker on the table. Undertaker grabs one of those big monitors WWE uses and bashes Show’s head in a few times with it. A BIG leg to put Show through the table in the huge spot of the match.

They slowly start heading back to the casket but take a detour into the ring instead. Old School is countered and things slow down again. There’s a side slam from Show as the crowd is a lot less interested than they were when Undertaker was on offense. The casket it opened and Undertaker is put inside but Show has to close the casket himself.

Since Show won’t close the lid, Undertaker comes back with a bunch of punches and the jumping clothesline. Show hits a big elbow in the corner to slow down Undertaker (and the crowd) again. For some reason Show loads up a Vader Bomb when Undertaker is half up and gets chokeslammed down.

The casket is opened again and a big boot to the side of Show’s head knocks him inside, but Show blocks the lid from being shut again. Back in and Show hits the chokeslam….then destroys the casket. Show starts walking away and there’s a wall of fire to stop him from leaving. Well of course there is. Undertaker goes after him and gets punched down again, but here are more druids with another casket.

Show punches Undertaker a bit more and stands the casket up so he can ram Undertaker into it and knock both of them down. The casket is stood up again but it’s open this time. Undertaker punches Show to the edge of the stage before whipping Show into the casket, causing it to fall and shut to give Undertaker the win.

Rating: D. This is considered a horrible casket match by some people but it’s really not that bad. It’s certainly a bad match but the ending was kind of creative and what are you expecting from Undertaker vs. Big Show? They’re going to hit each other a lot and it’s going to be slow, so why do people act surprised when any match with either of these two or Kane is the same formula? Not a good match but it’s definitely not terrible.

Carlito and Primo (cousins) hit on the Bellas but can’t tell them apart. In something I never thought I’d have to say again, the Gobbledygooker pops up and the Colons think it’s Charlie Haas, but of course he pops up in the room and the Gooker is played by the Boogeyman. This would be another pointless segment.

Randy Orton doesn’t want to be team captain but his team will win anyway. He implies Cody is the weak link of the team. Cody says that if Randy is eliminated first, it’s addition by subtraction. The team has to hold them apart.

Team Orton vs. Team Batista

Randy Orton, Mark Henry, William Regal, Cody Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin

Batista, Kofi Kingston, CM Punk, R-Truth, Matt Hardy

Cody is being mentored by Orton in a group called Legacy, Shelton is US Champion, Matt is ECW Champion and Punk/Kofi are Raw Tag Team Champions. Orton cost Punk the Raw World Title back in October, Hardy and Henry are feuding over the ECW Title, Truth is chasing Shelton’s Title and Regal has been helping Orton against Batista. This is quite the intricate match for a change.

Punk immediately charges at Regal and hits the GTS for the elimination in about ten seconds. Shelton gets a very fast two on Punk before pounding away on his back. Off to Kofi who grabs a front facelock. Kofi is even more over here than usual as he went to college in Boston. Kofi tries a monkey flip but Shelton lands on his feet and brings in Henry to pound away slowly.

Henry apparently gets tired after a few seconds so here’s Cody. Matt comes in, does nothing of note, and tags in Truth who pounds away. Striker talks about what a killing Truth is making as we can hear a lot of spots being called here tonight. I don’t know if the ring is mic’d loudly or what but you can hear all kinds of stuff here. Batista comes in and everybody runs until it’s only Cody left to face him. Rhodes quickly tags out to Shelton but Batista takes him down with ease and gets two via a powerslam. Off to Matt vs. Randy as things speed up. A bulldog gets two for Matt but a moonsault misses.

It’s off to Henry who lost the ECW Title to Hardy a few months ago. Cody comes in and chokes a bit but there’s the double tag to Truth vs. Shelton. A victory roll gets two for Truth and he does his backflip into the splits spot. The spinning forearm misses completely and Paydirt (a jumping downward spiral) gets the pin for Shelton. Kofi immediately comes in with a springboard cross body for two and a dropkick to put Shelton down.

The Boom Drop gets another two for Kofi but Henry blasts Kofi in the back of the head. Henry comes in legally now for more quick pounding and it’s finally off to Orton. Orton does his really slow stomp but the knee drop misses. Randy drapes him over the top rope and hits the hanging DDT for the elimination. Punk is immediately waiting on Orton, who gets beaten up for a few moments but gets in a rake to the eyes and tags out to Cody.

Rhodes works on the arm for a bit but gets caught by the knee and bulldog combo for two. Punk goes up but Manu (the other member of Legacy who didn’t last long) distracts him long enough for Cody to shove him off the top. A DDT eliminates Punk quickly and we’re down to 4-2 with Batista/Matt vs. Orton/Cody/Henry/Benjamin. Matt comes in and hits a quick Side Effect for two on Rhodes but it’s quickly back to Henry. Matt hits an elbow to the back of Henry’s head and manages to pull off the Side Effect for two. That’s about it for Hardy as the World’s Strongest Slam takes him out, leaving Batista all alone.

Batista immediately spears down Henry to make it 3-1 as Shelton comes in. Benjamin gets caught in a spinebuster almost immediately and the Batista Bomb gets is down to 2-1. Cody comes in and peppers Batista with some right hands before charging into a boot. Batista powerslams Rhodes down and says Orton is next. Batista hits the Bomb on Rhodes but Randy made a blind tag while Cody was in the air. The RKO gets the elimination and win for Rhodes and Orton.

Rating: B. This was a kind of throwback to the old school Survivor Series matches where the numbers finally caught up with the big face and he got beat. Orton vs. Batista was one of the big matches that WWE never really got to do on the scale I think they were hoping for. They would have a long match next month at Armageddon but that’s hardly the second main event at Wrestlemania which they were capable of having. Still though, good stuff here and the best match of the night by far.

Kozlov says he’ll win.

Hardy is officially out of the title match tonight.

The recap video is pretty pointless now because the video is mostly about Jeff. Kozlov is here because HHH wanted to have some big epic match with him that no one but him was interested in. Jeff is here because he keeps getting so close to winning the title so EVIL Vickie wouldn’t let him in the match. Jeff invaded the contract signing and beat up a lot of people until he was put in the match.

Smackdown World Title: Vladimir Kozlov vs. HHH

HHH is defending. After the big match intros we’re ready to go. The fans chant USA of course and for once it’s actually appropriate. Kozlov, the amateur wrestler/combat sports expert, takes it to the mat with amateur stuff. Now remember that, because it’ll become important later. HHH gets on the mat with him and hooks a headlock. The fans now chant boring as we hit a standoff. Now they want Hardy.

They trade arm holds on the mat and then trade even more arm holds on the same mat. Back up and HHH hits the high knee and a facebuster followed by the DDT for no cover. The fans chant for TNA before HHH hits the spinebuster. Kozlov counters the Pedigree and hits the headbutt to the chest to take HHH down. Vladimir sends HHH into the corner and out to the floor where very little happens.

Back in and a fall away slam gets two for the challenger and he fires some shoulders to the ribs. A powerslam gets another two and it’s off to a body grip to slow things down even more. Kozlov hits a pair of backbreakers for two and it’s back to that grip. HHH comes back with some right hands but gets powerslammed down for another two. A comeback by HHH is countered into a belly to belly as Taz says Kozlov is going to win, further dooming him to lose. HHH hits a Pedigree out of nowhere and here’s Smackdown GM Vickie Guerrero.

She says he’s here and makes it a triple threat, with the third man being the returning Edge. Edge does the psycho eyes on the way to the ring and I think a cameraman fell off the ramp as he was filming. Edge spears down HHH and here’s Jeff Hardy to destroy the Canadian. His chair shot hits HHH though, allowing Edge to steal the pin and the title.

Rating: D. There’s a lot to say here. First and foremost, as usual I disagree with anyone who said this was the worst match of the year. It’s arguably not even the worst match of the show, but think about this for a minute: are you telling me there isn’t some terrible Divas match somewhere in the year worse than this? Or that Honky Tonk Man vs. Santino Marella at Cyber Sunday was indeed better?

This match was indeed bad, but let’s think about this for a minute. Kozlov is supposed to be a combat sports expert and an amateur wrestler. So what did he do? He wrestled like his character was supposed to. Now was it boring? Absolutely. Was it a REALLY stupid move to put him in a World Title match? Absolutely. Were the fans interested? Not at all. If you want proof, back at Cyber Sunday the options for the title match were HHH vs. either guy, or a triple threat. The results were as follows:

Hardy – 57%

Triple Threat – 38%

Kozlov – 5%

Based on that alone, it’s clear that almost no one wanted to see HHH vs. Kozlov one on one. The interest just wasn’t there, so they booked a triple threat instead which there was interest in. Then they screw the fans out of their money by taking Jeff out of the match because of whatever their reasoning was. Then they flip the fans off AGAIN by having Hardy run in at the end. Hardy would pin Edge in another triple threat the next month to win the title in a shocker. Why this match didn’t happen here is beyond me, but again it’s screwing the fans out of what was advertised until the night before the show.

At the end of the day though, no one bought Kozlov as a real threat to the title. The guy just wasn’t going to be WWE Champion with the response he got, which is why Hardy was the interesting factor in this match. Without him, you have twelve minutes of your time being wasted until the ending, which should have been Hardy. Anyway, nothing to see here but it’s not the worst match of the year.

We recap Jericho vs. Cena. Jericho snuck into the Championship Scramble match last month at Unforgiven and stole the World Title while Cena was on the shelf. Tonight, Cena returns from a neck injury to try and get his title back. In his hometown. Against a guy that has literally only beaten him once. And we’re supposed to expect Jericho to have a chance because we’re supposed to ignore all that stuff.

Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. John Cena

Jericho is defending of course. Cena almost immediately tries the FU but Jericho bails to the apron. Jericho comes back with a headlock which works on the neck followed by a shoulder block to take Cena to the floor. John holds his neck a lot and looks shaken. Back in and Cena pounds away in the corner as they’re hitting hard but the pace of the match is pretty slow if that makes sense. Jericho takes over and things continue to go slowly.

Cena comes back with the Throwback and goes up for the Fameasser, only to come down because that’s the move that hurt his neck in the first place. Jericho takes over again and things go slowly. A kick to the side of Cena’s head puts him on the floor for a nine count. Back in and Cena slugs away but gets sent right back to the floor. Jericho throws him into the steps and heads back in for a neck crank.

After the hold is broken, it’s time for more choking followed by a full nelson. The hold lasts almost a minute and a half but Cena blocks the bulldog. A shoulder puts Jericho down but the second shoulder connects. Jericho misses the Lionsault but the Shuffle is countered into the Liontamer (kneeling Walls of Jericho)! He hasn’t used that in years but it looks awesome. Cena escapes the hold so Jericho puts on the regular Boston Crab instead. Cena, after being in the hold over a minute straight, grabs the rope to escape. Back up and Cena hits an FU out of nowhere but can’t follow up.

Both guys head up to the top with Cena slamming him to the mat, followed up by the top rope Fameasser. Cena is all fired up now but Jericho breaks up the FU and hits a Codebreaker for a delayed two. Jericho takes over and hits a clothesline followed by an EVIL smirk. He smirks a bit too much though and Cena grabs the STFU. Cena has to try to pull the hold back to the middle of the ring and Jericho kicks him away. The champ tries a small package but Cena pulls him up into the FU for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. The match itself was fine but there was less drama in this than in a Donald Duck cartoon. At the end of the day, Cena does not lose to Jericho and he does not tap out no matter what. The wrestling was fine and it told a story and all that jazz, but I’d rather have a main event where I wasn’t sure what was going to happen than a match being designed for Cena to have everything come together and win and then everything coming together to win.

Cena celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been doing so many of these lately, but this wasn’t the most interesting show in the world. It was dull at times and almost felt like a chore to sit through. The first hour or so is WAY worse than the rest of the show, but even the last two thirds aren’t all that great. This didn’t work that well and it’s not something I want to see again.

Ratings Comparison

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

Original: B+

Redo: C

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Original: D-

Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Big Show

Original: D+

Redo: D

Team Orton vs. Team Batista

Original: C-

Redo: B

Edge vs. HHH vs. Vladimir Kozlov

Original: D+

Redo: D

John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D+

I’ve flipped on the two male Survivor Series matches but other than that it’s about the same.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/17/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2008-let-jericho-beat-cena-once-just-one-time/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2008
Date: November 23, 2008
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Matt Striker, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

So here we are at the most recent Survivor Series. This show is built around one thing and one thing only: the return of John Cena. He was coming back from being hurt by Batista, so therefore he’s the #1 contender to Chris Jericho’s title. Considering this is in his hometown, the ending is pretty clear. On the Smackdown side we have the triple threat between HHH, Kozlov and allegedly Hardy, but this was the infamous stairwell angle that I’ve never gotten why it had such a huge backlash.

More on that later though. Anyway, Hardy isn’t there so we have a one on one match allegedly. There’s also three Survivor Series matches so that should be good. They’re going with longer matches this year, which I’m fine with. Let’s get to it and end this review series as even I’m fed up with this show at this point.

The intro is all about Cena and survival. No other matches are mentioned at all. Good to know that the company thinks so much of its other wrestlers. The theme song is by AC/DC though so I can’t really complain. We immediately start talking about the Hardy incident where they claim that ABC, CNN and TMZ have all talked about this.

That would surprise me, but I’d be more surprised if they would flat out lie like that on a live PPV. That’s something that’s a bit hard to cover up, so maybe those outlets did. TMZ I could certainly see doing it. Anyway, Ross’ voice sounds a bit off. Maybe he’s sick or something. Let’s get to it.

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

HBK, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali, Rey Mysterio
JBL, Miz, Morrison, MVP, Kane

The feuds here are pretty simple. HBK vs. JBL, the tag teams, Kane vs. Rey and MVP and Great Khali aren’t really feuding but they just didn’t have anything else to do. My goodness Lillian is gorgeous. How can you have multiple sole survivors? The money aspect of JBL vs. HBK hasn’t kicked off yet but they’re fighting a bit. These entrances are taking WAY too long. To say Rey is over is the understatement of the year.

MVP is in the middle of his big losing streak here that would ultimately make him a face. Miz and Morrison are just awesome, plain and simple. We start with MVP vs. Rey which should be a decent little match. If his partner didn’t suck so much, JTG would be a decent wrestler. He’s certainly the more talented member of his team, but dang he’s small. He’s also eliminated by a Drive By from MVP. He literally turns around and is hit by a Khali chop and pinned.

Well that’s a decent way to get rid of two guys I guess. It’s big on big now with Kane vs. Khali. The camera shot they use of looking up at them is really a cool looking thing. With an assist from Khali, Rey takes out Kane with a very high splash. We move on to Rey vs. Morrison here which should definitely be good.

The commentators are getting a lot of little verbal jabs in at each other which are at least being taken well. Good grief Shad is scary strong. Someone finally points out that Shad wears weird boots when he wrestles.

The commentators get into a long and weird debate/joke fest about 80s bands which makes no sense. They’re interrupted by Miz taking out Shad with a Reality Check. It’s 3-3 here as it’s HBK, Rey and Khali against Miz, Morrison and JBL. We get HBK vs. Miz which is a pretty cool match that I’d like to see more of. After JBL and Miz punch the heck out of HBK’s face, his eye is busted open a bit.

I would love to see Shawn vs. Morrison in a 20 minute match once. It would be awesome. Morrison starts using Shawn’s old moves, after having beaten him with a superkick on Raw this past week. That’s a cool angle when you think about it. After a long time of being in trouble, HBK makes the tag and Rey comes in. He goes completely human highlight reel and takes out Miz like he’s a jobber.

The you can’t wrestle chants kick off for JBL, which I’ve always thought was unfair. He’s a big power brawler. It wouldn’t make sense to have him do flips and technical stuff. It’s not in his nature. Rey has been held down his entire career? Really Grisham? He’s a former world champion, the greatest cruiserweight of all time and a surefire hall of fame guy. He’s really been held down. Morrison gets a nice counter to the bulldog move that Rey does.

I like it when people use counters to signature moves. It’s nice to see as it can’t be as hard as it’s implied. I don’t think it’s fair to say that JBL can’t wrestle, but dang his offense was pretty limited. Almost all he’s used are punches, clubbing blows and shoulder blocks. Throw out a powerbomb or a suplex or something buddy. Shawn comes in and after the nip up throws out a crotch chop to Morrison, foreshadowing the inevitable DX reunion number 18,000.

HBK and JBL go to the floor and fight it out resulting in JBL getting counted out but in a way that reminds me of a video game for some reason. Shawn almost walks into what would have been a SICK Sweet Chin Music from Morrison but naturally he ducks and kicks John’s head off for the pin and the victory.

Rating: B+. This was about as good of an opener as we were going to get. All of the eliminations made sense which is a lot more than I can say for some past matches. The feuds were kept alive which is the biggest thing you can ask for also. Everyone but JBL looked on their game out there and the result was solid. This is the epitome of a good Survivor Series match.

We go to the back where Eve, who is about to fall out of her top, is with HHH. HHH says that Jeff will be back, but tonight it’s HHH vs. Kozlov, which is what it should have been all along. HHH says that tonight is Kozlov’s first Survivor Series, his first title match, and his first loss. That’s a very short but good promo that hit exactly what it was supposed to do. There was a real chance that the Russian got the belt tonight, despite everyone on here knowing how much of a disaster that would have been.

Raw Divas vs. Smackdown Divas

Raw: Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Kelly, Candice Michelle, Jillian
Smackdown: Michelle, Victoria, Maria, Maryse, Natalya

This is Survivor Series rules. Santino is with Beth here. The Divas are wearing their respective brands shirts which they all pull off. Yep, this is all about wrestling ability. Oh yeah Michelle and Beth are the respective champions here. Ok so more or less this is how the first few eliminations go: rollup, move, rollup, rollup, move. That’s the issue with the modern Divas.

So many of them win matches with nothing but rollups, which I can’t accept is due to anything other than a lack of knowing how to do anything else. That’s just sad. To be fair they’re not just school boys, but they’re all leverage moves or jackknife pins or something like that. That’s fine once in awhile but it eventually gets really old really fast. The Smackdown Divas keep arguing over who the captain is since Michelle is eliminated.

After that big rant, Jillian is taken out by a rollup. Within seconds a Northern Lights suplex takes out Maria. That’s another thing: the eliminations are coming WAY too fast. Seconds later, Maryse takes out Candice with an inverted figure four which in essence is a Sharpshooter where you sit on the leg instead of pulling on it. The final two are Beth and Maryse. Beth wins it with a big power move. This was just boring. Santino of course celebrates because he needs to validate his existence.

Rating: D-. This was just a waste of time. The eliminations were like 45 seconds apart, the moves were just repetitive, this accomplished nothing, and no one cared. That’s the main problems I can think of right now and I’m sure there were more in there. I don’t get why these matches happen. I guess to keep pests off of Vince’s back for doing swimsuit contests.

Matt Hardy says he doesn’t know what happened to Jeff. He knows that Jeff got hit in the head but that’s it.

We recap Taker vs. Big Show’s 10,387th feud which was exactly the same as it always had been. This time it’s a casket match. Big Show says Taker has no power over him. That more or less seals the ending of this match.

Big Show vs. Undertaker

Taker comes out first here to his mega entrance, which comes off as odd to me. Not the big entrance but that he comes out first. That’s just odd. Oh apparently that was just a group of random druids bringing the casket down. Yeah that’s just odd. I always love thinking about the druids getting lunch or something. It’s just amusing. Naturally the gong gets a bit pop.

This starts in the ring for about 12 seconds with most of that being Taker having the casket raised up. Immediately after that we’re on the floor with Show in control. I really don’t like these kinds of matches as they’re just so basic and simple that they’re not very interesting for the most part. Thankfully the ECW guys were allowed to leave.

I’ve always felt sorry for them having to sit out there all night long for a single match and then do nothing for the other two and a half hours but watch the show. Dang the announcers have nice chairs. A legdrop puts Show through the table because we’ve never seen that before. Hey we’re in the ring for a change! This is the big problem with feuds like this: we know Taker is going to win and that Show is just there to give Taker something to do until he’s back in the title hunt.

It gets old after awhile, but it’s kept Taker very fresh over the years so I can’t really complain. Show gets Taker down and has him in the casket but wants the referees to shut it, allegedly due to fear. Of course Taker pops up and starts his comeback. Ross calls Show a mastodon and before the word is out of his mouth he goes up for a Vader Bomb. It didn’t work but whatever.

Show gets out of the casket as apparently we need to do even more of the same stuff. The crowd is kind of into it but not really. They react to spots and that’s about all. With Taker down in the ring, Show tips the casket over and starts to leave. A wall of fire stops him and heeeeeeeere’s Taker. A bunch of druids bring out another casket as Taker is back up. They’re really making Show look strong here which is a good thing.

In something unique they stand the casket up. That’s new if nothing else. After the next ridiculous comeback from Taker, he beats on Show a bit and then Irish whips him into the standing casket which falls over and closes to end it. That was actually a cool ending but it got ZERO reaction. I mean no one did anything at all when it happened.

Rating: D+. This was a waste of time. No one cared, mainly due to who was in it. There was no reason at all to watch this and it was just boring. These two have fought so many times and had so many boring matches that there’s just no reason to watch it. The ending was cool if nothing else, which is why it passes.

Buy Armageddon! We promise it won’t suck!

The Colons hit on the Bellas, who are indeed hot despite what some would like you to believe. Of all things, the Gobbledygooker comes in. I wish I was making that up. They think it’s Charlie Haas, but he walks up. It’s the Boogeyman.

Team Orton is in the back. Orton says he’d rather be fighting Jericho, leading to him and Cody arguing. Legacy hadn’t started yet but it was coming very soon.

Team Batista vs. Team Orton

Batista, Matt Hardy, CM Punk, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth
Orton, Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin, Regal, Mark Henry

No recap here, which more or less is the case because there’s very little story. The main thing here is about Orton and Batista. Orton put Batista out with a punt a few months earlier and is ticked off about it, leading to this. Punk and Kofi are tag champions here in the middle of their completely forgotten title reign that would end at the hands of Miz and Morrison soon after this. Matt is the ECW Champion here, in the middle of a pretty good feud with Mark Henry.

As for the other guys, there’s really nothing here. The Draft would change a lot around in 5-6 months, but until then there was just not a lot going on in the midcard. This match really was just kind of thrown together and there wasn’t a lot there for it. Rhodes has Manu with him here. The two of them and DiBiase had been trying to get Orton to join them but that wouldn’t happen for about two more months, forming Legacy.

Oh and Regal is IC Champion here, but he would lose it to Punk very soon. Speaking of Punk, he hits the GTS on Regal inside of 15 seconds to take him out. I’m assuming an injury or something like that there, but whatever. Kofi and Shelton get in there and just tear the place up for a few seconds. Truth really does have a cool look to him. Striker says that he’s making a killing here, which is amusing. The crowd is more or less dead here.

The announcers make sure to let us know that Orton vs. Batista is about Evolution. How can the feuds that came from a stable last longer than the stable itself did? I’ve never gotten that. Oh I think Shelton and R-Truth are having a mini feud here but no one really cared about it.

Like I said the feuds here were more or less thrown together and meant nothing at all. Oh I do remember R-Truth and Shelton. I watched them at a house show for the US Title. It more or less sucked. Shelton is US Champion here in case I forgot to mention that.

Truth is just sloppy. He walks into Paydirt though and it’s tied at 4. Kofi comes in off the top and Striker says the Jamaican is getting high. That’s just amusing. MVP would soon turn face and take the belt from Shelton, although not until just before Mania. Orton comes in and the match just slows down so much it’s insane. The second rope DDT takes out Kofi.

I would have thought the hair would absorb a lot of the impact there. Punk and Orton never got the match or angle that they should have after Orton cost him the world title at Unforgiven. That’s a shame as they would have had a great feud I think, or at least a great match or two. Naturally Punk was given a big thing of nothing like the tag titles. Granted he won the IC Title very soon, breathing some life back into it.

He would also get the MITB and world title again, so maybe I have no idea what I’m talking about. In what can only be called a shocker, Rhodes hits a DDT on Punk for the clean pin which has to be the biggest win of his career. I get the potential in him, but eventually he has to actually do something with it, and the same is true of DiBiase. We’re on to Henry vs. Hardy with the former slamming the heck out of Hardy to take him out.

Less than ten seconds later Henry is speared out by Batista. It’s 3-1 now in case you were wondering. We have Batista against Shelton, Rhodes and Orton. The Batista Bomb on Shelton makes is what would become Legacy vs. Batista. Dave runs through Rhodes but a quick tag from Orton saves him.

Despite Orton gyrating and jumping up and down waiting on Batista to turn around, the Animal doesn’t hear him. The RKO ends this, setting up the complete throw away match between Batista and Orton at Armageddon. Remember that match? I didn’t think so.

Rating: C-. I didn’t really like it. I liked Orton winning the way he did, but the whole thing went too fast. It wasn’t bad for sure, but it certainly wasn’t anything great. The complete lack of feuds hurt things a lot here too. Having so many people that had nothing to do with the main feud or anything like it hurt things. It was ok, but not great.

Kozlov says something that was supposed to be English I think. Never mind it’s Russian.

We recap the three way feud, despite Hardy not being here tonight. I would recap it, but it means nothing since Jeff isn’t wrestling and he’s the focus of the package.

WWE Title: Vladamir Kozlov vs. HHH

We get a bell for the introductions and a bell for the actual match, so technically the match was paused for the majority of the action. That joke has long since passed being funny. Naturally the USA chants start up. Within seconds the fans are chanting boring. More on that later. They’re doing a very mat based technical style here with some submission stuff. The we want Hardy chant is going strong for about 12 seconds.

A TNA chant starts up as they speed up the pace a bit. It’s not bad, but it’s a different style that I don’t think a lot of the people are into at all. It’s really not that bad. HHH is fighting a guy that’s never lost so he’s afraid to use his best stuff. He’s feeling out Kozlov at first to avoid making mistakes. What’s so weird about that? It’s a thinking man style from the Cerebral Assassin.

Why is that bad? I really don’t like the way Scott Armstrong counts. He’s the blonde referee that has that hitch in his count. It’s so annoying. This goes on for awhile, and while it’s kind of boring, it’s certainly not bad. From out of nowhere, HHH gets a Pedigree. He gets ready to cover him, but Vickie appears on the stage, saying that it will be a triple threat and that he’s here!

Naturally it’s not Jeff but rather the returning Edge. He hits a spear on HHH but Jeff runs out and beats up Edge. Ok wait, hang on a second. Jeff was ok to do the run in (this if from kayfabe mind you) but couldn’t wrestle? I thought he was supposed to be extreme or whatever. That makes little sense. Anyway, Jeff hits HHH and Kozlov with a chair but gets speared. Edge covers HHH and wins the freaking title again.

Rating: D+. This is going to be a long rating. Ok, so the match was pretty boring. Was it bad though? Not really. There was indeed a story there though as I outlined earlier on. Kozlov is supposed to be this master fighter and grappler, so what did he do you ask? He used a bunch of grapples and submission holds to wear down HHH. In other words, he did what his gimmick called for him to do.

HHH was wrestling smart, so he did what his gimmick called for him to do. The Edge twist felt cheap, but it’s nothing that he hasn’t done a dozen times or so already. However, Dave Meltzer of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter called this the worst match of the year. That my friends, is nonsense. The Divas match earlier was light years worse than this.

I would say that’s Meltzer simply continuing his quest to make WWE and Vince seem like the scum of the earth because for some reason he hates them both. He also called the Hardy angle the most tasteless of the year. This is one that I just do not get. Ok, let’s see. The reason the angle was considered in poor taste was Jeff’s past drug issues.

Tell me two things: when was it ever mentioned on WWE television that Jeff had drug issues, and when was it ever mentioned that this incident was drug related? Dang on the freaking broadcast they said he was hit on the head and attacked. It was an angle, nothing more. The drug thing was never mentioned once other than by people on the internet, but of course this is just so tasteless.

We’ll have Vickie Guerrero live off of Eddie’s name and make out with every guy under the freaking sun, but an angle that for all of 16 hours came close to hinting that Jeff might have had a relapse without ever saying it and clearing it up later that night was tasteless? Give me a break. It can be implied that Vince has slept with everything on the face of the earth and has a bastard midget son, but that’s not tasteless.

Women are flat out sex objects and nothing more, but that’s not tasteless. So it’s ok to do all that stuff, but having Jeff Hardy be found unconscious without ever saying what might have happened until on the show where they say he was attacked by a person and not an illegal substance is reprehensible? That’s the most hypocritical thing I’ve ever heard. If Jeff had another relapse, they wouldn’t have mentioned him being found out cold. Vince isn’t that stupid.

This reeked of angle the minute it broke at like 2:30 am the night before a PPV, but of course, it was tasteless right? Give me a freaking break. This is what gives the IWC a bad name: people making a huge deal about absolutely nothing at all when it was so clearly an angle. I said that the night it happened. I said it because it was obvious, but apparently Dave “he is risen again” Meltzer thinks otherwise, so it must be true right?

It doesn’t matter though as he’s barely a wrestling reporter anymore. Sorry I really can’t stand that guy. He does what all of us do and makes a fortune off of it. I’m sure someone will yell at me and tell me how brilliant he is, but no, not really. He’s good, but overrated. Ok, rant over for now at least.

Oh and it was revealed that Matt, Jeff’s brother, was behind everything. Jeff would win the title the next month in a freaking shocker anyway.

We jump from that to a recap of Jericho and Cena, which wasn’t really a feud but WWE kept trying to convince us of that anyway. Jericho had stolen the title at Unforgiven but as soon as Cena was announced as returning, the inevitable was clear. Oh and Batista got the world title for a week for no apparent reason in between. That’s about it.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

The ending here is about as obvious as you could imagine. Cena’s pop is massive here. They try to make it sound like Cena has been out for a year when it’s been about three months or less. Jericho works on the neck, which here at least makes sense. I get it three months after an injury, but when they reference it a year and a half later, it loses its effect quite a bit. This is really formula based stuff but it’s working ok.

Cena has an early flurry and then Jericho takes over for the majority of the match, working the neck as much as he can. There’s nothing wrong with that as it’s the same thing that worked for Hogan for years if not decades. Jericho’s three finishers all hit and of course none of them work. This is the longest match of the night but it’s likely going to have the least amount said about it. There’s little drama here and after that initial pop, the crowd has been ok at best.

This crowd has completely sucked all night long. Naturally, Cena survives everything and hits the massive FU to get the title back despite Jericho hitting everything he could on him. That closes the show, which is exactly what it should have been.

Rating: B. This was good enough. There was zero drama, but they didn’t bury Jericho. Cena certainly should have won as Jericho was just keeping the title warm for him for awhile anyway. There’s nothing wrong with that. Jericho was a horrible champion anyway and always has been, so this wasn’t a big deal at all. Cena was clearly going to win, and sometimes that’s how shows should end.

Overall Rating: C-. This had its moments, but overall it’s just not that great. With six matches you run the risk of messing up on one or two of them and screwing the whole show up which I think is what this show did. Having Hardy be pulled probably wasn’t the smartest thing in the world as I guess they didn’t want to take the spotlight away from Cena. I get that, but it’s still a good bit of a bait and switch which is the most annoying thing that a promoter can do.

It’s not as bad as Randy vs. Jake in 91, but it’s far from good. Anyway, this wasn’t a great show at all and it pales in comparison to 07. Still, it’s not awful, but it’s certainly not worth going out of your way to see. Not really recommended.

So that’s the Survivor Series. It’s certainly changed a lot over the years. It started out as the other PPV and slowly evolved into the Hulk Hogan Happy Hour as I don’t remember him losing at all until 91. The whole Survivor Series match thing has become an afterthought, which makes me sad as it certainly had the potential to be something big. It would have worked a lot better had they kept the initial formula of letting the heel get the win to tie up the series.

To be fair to Vince though, the ratings for the all SS matches shows were some of the worst of all time so he made the change that had to happen. I am glad though that they’ve at least kept the original matches around, but man they could do so much more with them. There have been some classics and there have been some awful shows, but that’s the case with all PPVs that have gone on for a long time.

It’s probably not my favorite of the Big Four, but it’s certainly a fun show, or at least it can be. Come to think of it, like I said in a thread I made, I don’t know if you can call this one of the Big Four anymore as it’s really more of the Big Three. Either way, this was fun to do, but just like at Summerslam I got annoyed with it near the end.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles

The company has finally settled down to the point where major changes are mostly done. The three rosters are working well enough and talent is moving from show to show fast enough to keep things interesting. There has however been one change, though it’s more the end of an experiment: all pay per views are now done by all brands, meaning there are no more Raw or Smackdown pay per views. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how this started twenty years ago, as you would expect it to. It also talks about the main event matches tonight, as you would expect it to as well.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz

Punk is defending and Miz (a reality TV star turned wrestler) and Morrison (formerly Johnny Nitro) are Smackdown Tag Team Champions. The team of course jumps CM at the same time because one on one, neither have a chance to beat Punk. Punk kicks the tar out of Miz’s head and gets a quick two on Morrison. Both challengers are sent to the floor where Punk takes both of them out with a suicide dive. Back in and Punk gets caught in a double suplex after the springboard clothesline fails.

Miz and Morrison double team Punk but Miz is the first of the heels to go extra heel, dumping Morrison out to the floor. He hooks a chinlock on Punk but has to let go to knock Morrison back to the outside. Punk kicks Miz in the head but Morrison comes back in with a backbreaker to CM followed by a cobra clutch (called a Japanese sleeper by Joey Styles).

Miz pulls Punk to the floor and rams him into the concrete to get us down to the challengers fighting. Morrison sends him into the corner chest first and hits the yet to be named Starship Pain for two. Punk comes back in and hurricanranas Morrison off the top into a powerbomb from Miz in a SWEET looking move. That only gets two but it got a BIG reaction from the crowd.

With Morrison pretty much dead, Punk kicks Miz in the face for two and hits the knee/bulldog combo for the same. Punk hits a backbreaker on Miz but Morrison grabs a rollup and trunks on the champ for two. Morrison escapes the GTS but gets knocked to the floor, allowing Punk to hit the GTS on Miz for the pin to retain.

Rating: C. Other than that hurricanrana/powerbomb spot, this was only ok. Punk had to carry the whole thing but you could see something special in Miz. It’s a little easier to see it now, but some people thought Miz would be the bigger deal because of this match. I’m not sure if I’d agree based on this match, but Miz did indeed look better than Morrison here. This was a pretty good choice for an opener, but the execution wasn’t great because Punk didn’t have enough to work with.

We recap MVP turning on Matt Hardy and taking out his knee. They had been partners for a long while before this but everyone thought MVP was evil the whole time, and this was the not very shocking turn.

MVP says that Matt won’t be competing tonight because he needs crutches to get by. That doesn’t surprise MVP, because Matt has always needed a crutch, be it either Jeff or MVP. Oh and he’s better than Matt.

Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Victoria/Layla

One fall to a finish here and Beth is Women’s Champion. Maria is a gorgeous ditzy redhead, Torrie is a bombshell, McCool is a pretty blonde, Phoenix is a very strong woman, Jillian is ditzy as well and Layla is a British woman who dances a lot. The Divas Title doesn’t exist yet which is how things should have stayed. Melina falls off the apron during her splits entrance which is worth a chuckle. The second attempt works and thankfully she’s smiling after screwing it up.

Victoria and Michelle start things off with Michelle taking over with a headlock. A big boot puts Victoria (later Tara in TNA) down and it’s off to Torrie who isn’t very good in the ring. Victoria kills her mostly dead with a side slam and it’s off to Layla who is so bad here that she can’t even beat up Torrie. Kelly and Jillian come in and Jillian tries to scream a bit, only to get rolled up for two.

Thankfully Beth comes in to flatten Maria before handing it right back to Layla. Actually make that Melina, who misses a charge at Maria and crotches herself, allowing for the hot tag to Mickie. James beats up everyone in sight, has her partners take out Beth, and hits the Long Kiss Goodnight (spinning kick to the face after a kiss) on Melina for the pin.

Rating: D. Yes, the match sucked. Yes, most of the women in this are horrible wrestlers. Yes, if you’re complaining about these things, you’re missing the point. This was pure fan service as you had ten girls in either tight or barely there outfits and one hot woman kicking another hot woman in the head. If you’re looking for a wrestling match here, you’re in the wrong place.

Coach and Regal are in the back looking smug. Hornswoggle, who is Vince’s son at this point, is pacing very nervously. Remember that he faces Khali tonight.

Orton says history isn’t going to be made tonight. He’s going to beat Shawn because if Shawn uses the superkick, Shawn loses the match.

Shawn is here for revenge tonight because Orton has tried to hurt him and take his livelihood. Therefore tonight, Shawn is going to take the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Cade and Murdoch (two rednecks) are defending. Rhodes (Dusty’s son) is brand new at this point and spent weeks getting beaten up by Holly before Holly respected him enough to team with him. Cody and Cade start things off with the rookie getting hiptossed down. The crowd pretty much died as soon as the bell rang, which should tell you about the tag team situation at the time as these are the best Raw had for their belts.

Off to the very redneck Murdoch who chops away but gets caught in a headlock. Yeah Cody didn’t quite get anywhere as a worker for a long time. Holly comes in and is immediately beaten down by Cade. The crowd is reacting a bit so it’s not totally dead but it’s nothing special. The heels are sent into each other and fall out to the floor as Holly takes over. We actually get a HOLLY chant for the only time I can ever remember.

A rollup gets two for Hardcore and it’s off to Murdoch via a blind tag. Holly gets his head kicked off and things slow back down again. The champs tag in and out a lot before Cade picks up Murdoch to drop him down with a legdrop for two. We hit the chinlock on Holly which goes nowhere so Holly suplexes Trevor down. Cade misses an elbow drop but Holly still can’t tag out.

Cade tries that dropping Murdoch into a legdrop move again but as almost always is the case, it doesn’t work this time. Warm tag brings in Cody who hits a missile dropkick on Lance for two. Holly and Cade fall to the floor and Murdoch hits something resembling a Canadian Destroyer (flip piledriver, though this was much more like a sunset flip than a piledriver) to retain.

Rating: C-. Another so-so match here but at the end of the day, it’s Hardcore Holly and a rookie Cody Rhodes vs. Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch. That’s only going to take you so far as the fans aren’t going to care about it for the most part. I don’t get why they didn’t change the titles here as Holly and Rhodes would get the belts in a month (and hold them for SIX MONTHS) anyway.

The announcers explain the concept of a Survivor Series match to the uninitiated. That’s something you hardly ever see anymore: a basic explanation of WHAT IS GOING ON. Sometimes you need to slow things down a bit and tell people how things work. If you’re flipping through the channels and see something flashy like wrestling, you’re likely to stop but if you have no idea what’s going on, you’re not likely to stay. Gorilla Monsoon was a master at doing this.

Team HHH isn’t worried about being down 5-4 coming into the match (Matt Hardy was hurt) but Kane says he isn’t an underdog. We recap the Katie Vick angle (HHH: “Uh…..yeah sorry about that.” If you don’t know what this is, be glad and keep it that way.) and Jeff reminds HHH that he put him in the hospital. HHH is sorry about that too and says tonight they can unite in the idea of doing something terrible to someone else.

Team HHH vs. Team Umaga

HHH, Kane, Jeff Hardy, Rey Mysterio

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, MVP, Finlay, Big Daddy V

Big Daddy V is a much fatter Mabel. Kennedy’s mic doesn’t work for the live intro at first so we can only hear the ending. Jeff is Intercontinental Champion and MVP is US Champion. Remember that we’re starting at 5-4 because Matt is gone. Rey and Kennedy get things going with Kennedy using a rare power advantage to take over. Kennedy pounds in the corner but gets caught in a sunset bomb before it’s off to Jeff for a BIG pop. Rey and Jeff combine for some Poetry in Motion and Kennedy is in trouble.

Scratch that trouble as Jeff runs into an elbow (JBL: “That’ll knock the purple out of your hair!”) and it’s off to MVP. MVP limps a bit which apparently is a fake injury. Or maybe he’s making fun of Matt Hardy. Off to the 550lb Big Daddy V who uses his big fat man offense on Jeff, before stupidly throwing Jeff to the corner for a tag to Kane.

V almost immediately belly to belly suplexes Kane down for two but Kane comes back with some clotheslines in the corner. A top rope clothesline puts V down again but Kane has to chokeslam Finlay. V hits a Samoan Drop and a big elbow on Kane for the upset elimination. HHH comes in and hits the facebuster on the monster but gets caught by a clothesline to shift the momentum right back.

We get the match that everyone is looking forward to in HHH vs. Umaga and the fans don’t react at all. Umaga takes him down with a belly to belly of his own and a headbutt has HHH in trouble. Umaga misses a middle rope headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Rey. Rey pounds away but almost immediately gets knocked down by the other monster. Mysterio goes after the leg but a hurricanrana is just a bad idea. Actually it isn’t as he swings Umaga into the 619, followed by a springboard seated senton for two. Umaga unleashes a BIG SAMOAN SCREAM and hits a spinning release Rock Bottom and the Spike to eliminate Rey.

So it’s all five villains vs. Jeff and HHH, and it’s not that the two superheroes are likely to run through all five and win or anything like that of course. Jeff vs. Kennedy starts things off and Hardy is in trouble quickly. I don’t think Jeff really gets going until he looks like he’s been thrown out of a building though. Jeff comes back with a dropkick but the slingshot dropkick in the corner misses due to an MVP assist. Cole talks about how that’s the second time MVP has caused that move to miss in three days. JBL: “Maybe MVP is just smarter than the Hardys.”

Off to MVP who hooks a chinlock on Jeff which goes on for a while. Jeff fights up but gets gets caught in a fireman’s carry drop. MVP starts talking trash to the fans and walks into a Twist of Fate to make it 4-2. Kennedy is in next and walks into an enziguri, which allows for the tag off to HHH. A high knee sets up a clothesline for two for HHH followed by a spinebuster. HHH sees the human whale known as Big Daddy V coming and avoids an elbow which crushes Kennedy and allows HHH to make it 3-2.

V gets both superheroes on the floor and crushes Hardy against the post to put him down for awhile. Back in the ring HHH and Hardy avoid a charge in the corner and hit a double DDT on V for the elimination. I’ve always wondered how basic moves when a monster is fresh is enough to eliminate them. These guys have no stamina at all.

It’s HHH/Jeff vs. Finlay/Umaga if you’re keeping track. Finlay comes in and pounds away on HHH while JBL talks about how great Finlay is. Finlay goes to the middle rope and jumps into HHH’s boot to put both guys down. Hot tag brings in Jeff for a hard Irish whip into the corner and the slingshot dropkick for two. Jeff goes to the apron and is immediately drilled by Umaga to give the evil foreigners control again. Finlay whips Jeff into the corner but gets caught by a Whisper in the Wind. A mule kick staggers Umaga and there’s the hot tag to HHH to meet Finlay. The high knee puts Finlay down and there’s a spinebuster to follow it up.

The Pedigree is loaded up but Umaga kicks HHH’s head off to break it up. The Celtic Cross (White Noise) is escaped and there’s the Pedigree to make it 2-1. Umaga DESTROYS HHH in the corner but the running attack misses by a mile. The Pedigree and Swanton Bomb connect and we’re done.

Rating: B-. The match was pretty fun stuff but once we got down to 5-2, it was a matter of guessing what order the five were going out in rather than who was going to win. That being said, it’s probably the right move as HHH would move on from Umaga after this and take to feud with Orton. That feud would follow Hardy vs. Orton at the Rumble, so this was definitely a launching pad for the two survivors back to the main event.

Shaquille O’Neal is here.

Hornswoggle is still nervous in the back. Tonight’s match is another of those tough love things from Vince. Speaking of the boss, he comes in and Hornswoggle immediately hugs his leg. This is one of those things that I think WWE missed about Hornswoggle: he acts like a child.

Allow me to lose control for a second. HE HAS A FULL BEARD! THE GUY IS IN HIS TWENTIES! HORNSWOGGLE IS NOT A CHIL……why am I annoyed by this? It’s Hornswoggle. Vince says he made this match because Hornswoggle is a McMahon and therefore has to rise to the occasion. He compares this to his battles with Turner and the US government. Vince gives him a pep talk and Hornswoggle is ready.

Here’s Shane McMahon to the arena, rocking a suit. Shane introduces Vince and apparently they’ll be in the corner of Hornswoggle tonight. Well that’s nice of them. JBL says this is going to be Biblical. Cole: “This isn’t the Bible.”

Hornswoggle vs. Great Khali

Runjin Singh, Khali’s manager, says we should have the wrestlers get together for the reading of the rules. This results in Singh talking over the referee as he translates. The fans want Shaq (Shaquille O’Neal) but they get the bell instead. The fans realize Shaq is here and Vince tells him to sit down. Vince tells the fans he doesn’t care what they want.

Hornswoggle takes off his jacket and hat and kicks Singh in the face. He kicks at the legs of Khali…and wisely runs away. Singh runs his mouth some more and gets GREEN MIST IN THE FACE! Hornswoggle dives on Singh and pounds away before hiding from Khali under the ring. The small guy finds that Irish club and calls Khali in but the stick is of course caught. Khali kicks him down but before the Vice Grip can go on, Finlay runs in for the save and face turn.

Rating: D-. Well, there was at least a purpose so it’s not a total failure. It should have been on Raw though and the whole story really wasn’t the most entertaining. At the end of the day, this is a big comedy angle designed to get……actually I’m not sure who this is designed to get over. Not that it worked anyway but some clarification would be nice.

Finlay beats up Singh and Khali with the club. It would eventually be revealed that Finlay was Hornswoggle’s father, but I’m not quite sure why Vince agreed to the whole thing in storyline.

Alfonso Soriano, a baseball player, is here.

We recap Shawn vs. Orton. Shawn had the title won in a previous match but Orton intentionally got himself disqualified and then punted Shawn to the shelf for a few months. Shawn admitted he wanted revenge but Vince banned the superkick for no apparent reason other than being evil.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending, if Orton gets DQ’ed the title changes, Shawn can get no more shots if he loses, and if Shawn attempts to use the Superkick, he loses the match. Shawn almost immediately goes to the cravate and Orton spends nearly two minutes trying to fight out of it. Now that’s a (European) headlock. Orton escapes in the corner and Shawn raises his leg for the kick but the referee says that wasn’t an attempt. It’s going to be one of those referees I guess.

Orton drops down as Shawn runs the ropes so Shawn gets on Randy’s back and chokes away. The hold switches to a front facelock as they’re spending a lot of time in holds so far. Randy finally gets to the floor where Shawn fakes diving over the top so he can dropkick him through the ropes before faking ANOTHER dive and hitting an Asai moonsault in a good sequence. Back in and Orton rolls through a crossbody for two before hitting an uppercut to take over.

Shawn fights up and throws on the required Sharpshooter until Orton finally makes the rope. Orton comes back with a thumb to the eye and snaps Shawn across the top rope to take over. The Elevated DDT hits for two. It’s off to a chinlock by Orton as the hold marathon continues. It’s not boring or bad but it’s a very different way of going about a match.

Shawn fights back but walks into a dropkick for two. He catches another dropkick in mid air and slams Randy down a few times before hitting the top rope elbow for two. By instinct, Shawn tunes up the band but he fakes Orton out by making him duck and grabs a rollup for two. Brilliant psychology there.

In a move I was shocked to see at the time, Shawn puts on a Crossface. Remember that this is just five months after Benoit so that’s not a move you would have expected to see here. Orton finally gets a leg over the rope and Shawn looks spent from that not working. He tries the hold again but Randy clotheslines his head off for two. Orton hits the backbreaker and loads up the same Punt which kept Shawn out for five months.

Randy gets a running start but Shawn grabs an ankle lock with a grapevine to make Orton scream. Orton uses the good leg to kick Shawn away and break the hold. Why don’t more people do that to Angle? Michaels tries the Figure Four but Orton kicks him into the post. Shawn pulls up the foot for the kick but since he has to stop, Orton hits the RKO for the pin to retain the title.

Rating: B. I was digging the psychology here as Shawn had to come up with all kinds of ways to beat Orton instead of the superkick. It says a lot about Shawn that the only way they could have Orton be able to hang in a fight with him was to take away Shawn’s big move. Orton would hold the title for another five months or so until HHH (of course) took it away from him.

Orton demands that Shawn say Orton is the future but Shawn is pretty out of it. Not out of it enough though as there’s the superkick we were waiting on.

Cole is talking about the main event and SAVE US. For those of you unfamiliar, this was a series of videos that popped up at random on shows with what looked like the Matrix announcing that someone was coming to SAVE US. It would be revealed the next night that it was the return of Chris Jericho.

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker. Batista lost the belt to Undertaker at Wrestlemania and they feuded for the title on a few PPVs. After a cage match on Smackdown, Edge cashed in the MITB contract and won the title from Undertaker. Later, Edge was hurt and had to vacate the belt, which was won by Khali. Batista eventually beat Khali for the belt and Undertaker came back to challenge him for it.

They fought at Cyber Sunday with Batista winning, which made them 1-1 with a few draws. Undertaker wanted one more match and Batista was perfectly cool with that, but Undertaker wanted it in the Cell. See how that worked? It was a natural progression with the Cell being the FINAL match between them (one on one at least). That’s a logical progression that you rarely get anymore.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Batista is defending. Undertaker charges to start and is caught in a headlock before getting run over by Big Dave. Undertaker shrugs it off and tries an early chokeslam but Batista fights out of it. This is one of those feuds where you don’t bother with the basic stuff and go with the big power moves because that’s all that’s going to have any effect. Undertaker clotheslines him down and pounds away in the corner. We’re still in the early going here so this doesn’t mean a lot yet.

The Snake Eyes and big boot get two for Undertaker and it’s already chair time. Batista hits a BIG spear to take Undertaker down and gets the chair. That goes badly for the champ as Undertaker kicks the chair back into his face and gets two off a clothesline. They head outside and Undertaker keeps control with a solid shot into the steps. Batista gets raked against the Cell and there’s the legdrop on the apron.

To stay on the throat, Undertaker puts the chair over Batista’s throat and slams the bottom of the chair into the steps. The champ is bleeding from the mouth now. Back in and Undertaker covers by driving a forearm into the throat. Undertaker is kind of the heel in this match, which says A LOT about how over Batista was here. Back in, Undertaker loads up Old School but Batista catches him in the spinebuster in a cool counter.

They slug it out and Batista takes over with a clothesline that gets two. Batista hits a powerslam and takes it back to the floor. They’ve done a solid job here of having both guys dominate for a long stretch which usually works well for a big time match. Undertaker whips Batista into the Cell to take over again so maybe what I just said is nonsense. Batista gets rammed head first into the steel and things are starting to pick up.

A chair shot keeps Batista down and the champ is cut open on the forehead. Batista blocks Old School again and hits a superplex to put both guys down. As Batista is crawling over to him, the Dead Man tries the Hell’s Gate (triangle choke) but it’s not on full. Batista makes the rope and heads to the floor for a breather, setting up the Undertaker Dive over the top rope.

Undertaker picks up the steps and tries to ram Batista with them, but the champ pulls himself up using the cage and kicks them back into Undertaker’s face. Batista picks up the steps and just rams Undertaker in the head with them four or five times to draw blood. Back in and Batista does the stupid thing of punching Undertaker in the corner and gets a Last Ride for his efforts. That only gets two and the pop isn’t huge from the crowd. They know we’re getting A LOT of finishers before a pin here.

There’s a chokeslam but it only gets two. The Tombstone is countered into a spinebuster for two and there’s another spinebuster for good measure. It’s table time and Batista easily powerbombs him through it….for two. There’s the pop from the crowd on the kickout that we were looking for. Now the Animal loads up the steps but Undertaker backdrops him onto said steps for two. The Tombstone hits….for two again, making Batista one of a handful of people to survive the Last Ride, Tombstone and a chokeslam.

Undertaker KILLS Batista with a Tombstone on the steps but someone pulls the referee out of the ring at two. It’s the returning Edge, who I presume was hiding under the ring the whole time. He steals a camera and clocks Undertaker with it before hitting a Conchairto on the steps. Batista has no idea this is going on after the Tombstone. Edge pulls the champ on top and the pin is pretty much academic.

Rating: B+. This was very good but it never quite got to that level that they were hoping for it to I don’t think. The problem is this was match was based on respect instead of hatred which takes a lot out of a match like this. Edge would win the title in a triple threat next month and eventually lose it to Undertaker at Wrestlemania.

After the Cell is raised, Edge beats on Undertaker some more to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a nice surprise. The Tag Team Title match is some uninspired stuff but other than that (ignoring the non-match between Khali and Hornswoggle) there’s nothing bad on here at all. The Divas match is what it is and if the worst thing I have to do is look at Kelly Kelly and Maria in barely there shorts for five minutes, I’ve got a good show on my hands. The big matches delivered and the other matches aren’t bad so this is a solid show all around and worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz

Original: B-

Redo: C

Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Victoria/Layla

Original: D

Redo: D

Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Original: D

Redo: C-

Team HHH vs. Team Umaga

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: D+

Redo: B

Batista vs. Undertaker

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

The main thing I’ve learned about myself from these redos is that I was a lot looser with my grades back then. The redo grades here are a lot more toned down and it’s a bit harder to please me now.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/16/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2007-batista-vs-undertaker-in-the-cell/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Tazz, JBL, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Joey Styles

With another year comes not a lot of change. Orton is world champion here having taken out HHH for the belt at No Mercy in their first last man standing match. Tonight he takes on HBK in another of his random filler feuds before Cena gets back from injury. The Game is the other major player on Raw (shocking isn’t it?) as he’s feuding with Umaga for your Survivor Series match of the night.

Over on Smackdown, we only have one big match, but it’s a major one as Taker is challenging Batista for the world title in a Hell in a Cell match. If nothing else they’re keeping it big. Oh and one other thing: Hornswoggle is Vince’s son now.

Yes, that painfully stupid and bad storyline has finally begun as he’s already dropped the Cruiserweight Title because Vince doesn’t like small wrestlers. Finally, we have my boy Punk defending his ECW Title against the newly crowned tag team champions of Miz and Morrison. That should be good. Let’s get it started.

Hey, take a wild guess as to what the opening video is about. If you guessed Survival, you’re of about average intelligence as the show is called Survivor Series. If you guessed that it sucked, then you’ve been paying attention to my reviews. Yep, this is nothing of note. We’re starting with the ECW Title match, so the first two voices that we hear are Joey and Tazz. Surprisingly we don’t hear their colleagues yet, which is odd indeed.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz

Punk took the belt off of Morrison and Miz said he wanted it. That’s about all I’ve got for you here as far as a backstory since ECW back then was even less developed than it is now if you can believe that. Oh yeah. And they were thrown together on Smackdown (literally) and given a tag title shot because two guys that are thrown together that hate each other are light years ahead of all the other great tag teams on Smackdown right?

See what kind of shape the division was in around this time? Somehow this wasn’t even the worst it would be. However, these two would be pretty much the best team in a good long while and will likely be that for a good long while. Also, around this time there was a big thing about how Miz couldn’t wrestle. A buddy of mine and I said just give him time. I’m writing this in mid-October, two days after being completely blown away by a segment these two did at a Smackdown taping I was at.

Now as of this writing, it hasn’t made air in America yet. I’ll be most interested in seeing how many people are saying how awesome he is after that. Styles goes through all of the combinations that could result in Punk losing his title which is somewhere between interesting and filler. You might think that this is a handicap match, but it really isn’t. These two don’t get along yet and while they’ll double team for awhile, it’s usually very short indeed.

I’ve always loved that suicide dive that Punk does. He does the WHAT’S MY NAME thing that worked so well in ROH but never caught on in WWE. To be fair though, the crowd starts a big CM Punk chant. My goodness this guy was over. After beating on Punk as a team for awhile, Miz and Morrison break up again, maybe over one of them not doing the dishes or something. Good night Morrison does some amazing stuff out there.

He still does the same kind of stuff today but dang this was impressive stuff back then too. We get a glimpse of Miz vs. Morrison her but it’s nothing really that special. Punk hits a backbreaker that used to be called Welcome to Chicago M’Fer which has been changed for obvious reasons. Following some miscommunication from the new tag team, Punk hits the GTS on Miz for the pin.

Rating: B-. It got the crowd going a bit, but at the same time there was never any real drama in this at all. That’s fine though, as I don’t think there was really supposed to be. Sometimes you need to just have a match to get some ring time for the champion and have a decent match out of it. It makes the champion look stronger and saves the showdown for later on. This was just fine.

We get a recap of MVP hurting Matt’s leg and putting him out of the Survivor Series match later tonight. MVP had a big C on his outfit back then. He was CMVP. Oh that’s just awesome. Anyway, now we go to the back where some interviewer that I don’t recognize is talking to him. He’s REALLY bad on promos at this point.

Face Divas vs. Heel Divas

Faces: Mickie, Maria, Torrie, Michelle, Kelly
Heels: Beth, Jillian, Melina, Layla, Victoria

This is your token Diva match of the night. Torrie has what is now Tiffany’s music. Basically, around this time the only face Diva that can wrestle at all is Mickie. There’s no story here at all as this could just as easily have been on Raw. Thankfully this isn’t elimination style. We start with the almost too hot Victoria against Michelle. Ok, the Divas yelling at each other is REALLY annoying. Kelly is in essence in a swimsuit with sleeves.

To show the brilliance on display here, Torrie has Victoria down and leaves her there to run across the ring and get a tag. That’s tag wrestling 101 there and she can’t get that right. Even trying to pull Victoria back to Torrie’s corner would have worked. Whatever let’s just get this over with. Jillian is in now and for some reason rubs Kelly’s face in her chest. Wow. Anyway, we get the obligatory handspring elbow, which is the most impressive athletic maneuver there is.

It’s so impressive that nearly every Diva does it. Dang will you STOP WITH THE FREAKING SCREAMS? CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW FREAKING ANNOYING IT WOULD BE TO HAVE SOMEONE THAT SCREAMED EVERY TIME THEY OPENED THEIR FREAKING MOUTH? IT WOULD BE SO FREAKING….never mind. JR actually makes a bit of a comparison of Kelly and the Great Muta. I’m at a lost for keystrokes. All of the heels are wearing some form of red. Is that some messed up team unity thing?

Mickie comes in and attempts to save this match. Mickie hits the sexiest move in wrestling history, The Long Kiss Goodnight, to get the win. It was a move where she grabbed the other girl’s hair and actually bent her back and kissed her before kicking her in the face. Why do I have a feeling that’s Norcal’s dream date? Oh and Michelle fell out during the match. Nothing special.

Rating: D. That’s half of what this match was all about. The other letter is also D. Yep, this was all about looks here. If you don’t believe me, look at Kelly and Maria’s outfits. They’re just there for looks and nothing more. This was just bad and showed how awful the majority of the women were at the time. At least it was short and the girls looked good.

Orton says he’ll win.

Shawn says he’ll win. Well I’m glad they’re in agreement that he’ll win. Shawn looks stoned here and actually swears. That’s surprising.

Raw Tag Titles: Cade and Murdoch vs. Holly and Rhodes

Please…make it short. This was the token title feud of the month as the faces were thrown together over respect or something and instantly were number one contenders. The problem with the tag title picture was simple: Miz and Morrison were thrown together and won the tag belts. Holly and Rhodes were thrown together and won the tag belts. Do I need to explain why this was such a complete and utter failure for so long?

The reunification has helped a good bit lately, but they’re still in desperate need of help. With a roster as big as they have, it really wouldn’t be hard to get a few teams together and put some stories out there. Think of all the guys on the roster that never do anything but could have decent matches. The stuff is there, trust me.

Could Cade be any more generic? Hey! Buy Armageddon so we can validate our completely stupid PPV schedule. Holly and Rhodes won a triple threat vs. Londrick and the Highlanders to get here on Heat of all places. DAng it’s weird to see Rhodes as such a rookie like this. Rhodes and Cade start us off. Rhodes has bulked up a bit since this.

Rhodes literally slaps Murdoch on the back. That sounded sick too. Holly in now who takes down Murdoch. Holly does his low kick that isn’t really low but really looks like it is while the other guy is on the ropes. The champions are in trouble here. Double teaming gets the advantage back to the rednecks.

Cade takes Holly down to prevent he tag as this is just DRAGGING. There’s no reason for this to be on PPV but it is anyway because that’s how tag wrestling in this company works. There’s your heel miscommunication so that Rhodes can come in. And then that doesn’t work as he hits a missile dropkick for two and walks into Melina’s finisher (the sunset bomb thing) from Murdoch to retain.

Rating: D. This was just bad. Just like the match before it, there was no need to have it on PPV. Neither team stands out at all and there’s just nothing special about it. It’s not any good at all so there’s no way to say it’s anything but bad by default. Horrible match and everything that’s wrong with tag wrestling in this era. Holly and Rhodes would get the titles a few weeks later.

Team HHH says that they’re going to do some terrible things to the other team. In a very funny bit, Kane and Jeff mention all the things that HHH has done to them over the years. That’s just amusing. Jeff is taller than I thought he was.

After a too short to tell what’s going on recap of the Survivor Series match, we’re ready to go.

Team HHH vs. Team Umaga

HHH, Kane, Jeff Hardy, Rey Mysterio
Umaga, Big Daddy V, Kennedy, Finlay, MVP

Matt is injured remember, so it’s starting as a handicap match.

I love the way Justin Roberts talks. In what cracked me up, Kennedy comes out to do his standard intro and the mic doesn’t work. About halfway through it kicks on mid word. That’s just hilarious. Big Daddy V is in desperate need of a shirt. MVP needs to bring back the counting part of his music. It’s so much better that way. Let’s see: the most successful heel here is….MVP I guess? Maybe Umaga?

On the other side, we have four former/future world champions. Oh yeah this is going to be a great contest here. Kane’s pyro is some of the loudest stuff you will ever hear in your life. It’s insanely loud. Rey’s song really is catchy when it’s all you’re hearing in the arena. Jeff has his old music here. The start of his singles run would be in less than two months as he would fight Orton for the title at the Rumble. He’s IC Champion here.

Oh yeah the feuds. HHH vs. Umaga, Kane vs. BDV, Jeff vs. no one in particular, Rey vs. Finlay, Matt vs. MVP so I guess Jeff gets Kennedy and MVP by default. We’re now at ten minutes of entrances. We start off with Kennedy and Rey, so an overrated guy that’s good but nowhere near as good as he is made out to be vs. Kennedy. This is pretty decent stuff here as Kennedy for once gets to show what he can do, which isn’t bad.

He’s not the next Austin but he’s not bad at all. Rey does in essence the same move that Murdoch won with earlier, using that pesky thing known as the right way. JR says that Hardy has D. Wade like hang time. That just doesn’t sound right at all. BDV comes in to beat on Hardy for awhile since we need jobbers out there for awhile.

We move on to Kane vs. BDV which was a feud at the moment, so look for a big pinfall here. Kane hits the big clothesline from the top to put him down for a bit as this is really just no sell theater.

Following a little interference from Finlay the Samoan Drop ends the Big Red Machine to make it 5-3. Again, Kane jobs. Some things never change. The facebuster from HHH simply couldn’t miss more than it does here. We get HHH vs. Umaga here, which I guess was supposed to be a big deal? It’s just coming off as weak to me, but whatever.

After HHH (which I accidentally spelled as HGH for a bit there in a funny moment) gets beaten down, Rey comes in and after making Umaga look ridiculously bad, goes out to the Spike, leaving us with 5-2. I can smell the comeback coming from a mile away. We start this part with Jeff vs. Kennedy, which would have been an interesting feud had various things not happened. After a missed Drive By, Jeff gets a quick Twist of Fate to make it 4-2.

Kennedy is taken out after something that looks like it came out of a Three Stooges short with all of the blunders by the heels. HHH gets the pin. We move on to Viscera vs. HHH since I guess the fat man had to get something done that night. A double DDT takes him out to get us to 2-2 and you can see the ending coming from here. In probably the biggest thing of his career, Finlay beats on HHH for awhile before the tag to Hardy brings the crowd back a bit.

Once the terrible twosome were all that was left, this match started going downhill fast. This needs to end, like now. After a lot of token offense from Finlay, HHH comes in and takes care of Finlay. Cole tries to build Finlay as an equal to HHH. That’s just amusing. About 44 seconds later, the Pedigree leads to the Swanton which leads to the end of this way too long match. The face team of the gods celebrate for awhile before we’re done.

Rating: C-. This is a tale of two grades here. Before we got down to the final two faces, this was pretty good. After that, the whole thing just fell apart because there was zero chance that the faces weren’t both going to survive. Kane and Rey were just filler out there and everyone knew it. The first part is good, the second part is just bland. It got Jeff over though, which was the main goal of the whole thing.

Vince tells Horny not to die. That’s just funny.

Hornswoggle vs. Great Khali

You know the story so let’s get this over with. Vince and Shane are with Horny here. When I grow up, I want to be one of Runjin Singh’s sideburns. They do the rule thing just to add more hijinks to this. The fans chant We Want Shaq. Ok then. Oh yeah this is Miami when Shaq was on the Heat. That makes sense now. Oh and Shaq is in the front row. See what happens when I pay attention? Vince grabs a mic and says he doesn’t care what the fans want.

At least he’s honest. Horny runs once Khali screams at him. For some reason he spits mist at Singh who doesn’t do anything but stand there with a what the heck look on his face. Well thanks for that buddy. The club that Horny grabs is knocked away and then Khali smacks him. This needs to end like now.

The joke is over and has been for a long time. Just as I say that, Finlay runs out and hits Khali with the club to make the save for the DQ. The fact that Finlay would be revealed as the real father was about as obvious as possible at this point.

Rating: N/A. It was a joke, not a match.

We hit the recap button on HBK vs. Orton. This is pretty simple. Orton was on a punting spree and one of his first targets was Michaels. The night after Orton beat HHH at No Mercy there was this big ceremony for him which ended in Shawn returning in what was a cool moment. They had a match at Cyber Sunday where Orton got himself disqualified. That led to this, where Shawn can’t use the superkick and Orton can lose the belt via DQ. That’s about it.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Lillian looks great with her hair pulled back. Ross takes a small shot at FOX News, so at least some things never change. Orton hasn’t started hearing voices yet. Oh and the belt still spins. This is Shawn’s second PPV in 5 months. Shocking isn’t it that he more or less took the summer off after Mania. He would never do anything like that again would he? Dang that spinning belt looks like crap. It’s scary that today the belt looks about 100x better.

We get the old school ceremony of the referee checking the boots and pads etc. I love the little things like that because they can enhance a match so much. Shawn starts off with a lockup known as a Crevate. Now most of you have likely never heard of that. It’s a European style headlock but not quite. More or less you look like you’re setting for a snapmare but you grip like it’s a headlock. It’s really a cool idea and there’s a lot of stuff you can go with from that position.

Chris Hero is well known for using a ton of varieties of things like it. They go to a LONG headlock/front chancery sequence that has the crowd on the edge of unconsciousness. Finally we hit the floor for a bit where Shawn hits a picture perfect Asai Moonsault to knock Orton down. The commentators try to argue that Shawn is using a different style here because he’s not allowed to use the kick. That makes ZERO sense.

Think about it. Shawn’s finishing move is a kick to the head. What kind of setup does that require? All it takes is one second and some accuracy and he’ll knock you out. It’s not a wear down move like a figure four where going for it immediately makes no sense. It’s a move that can be hit from nowhere. Think of the Iron Man match.

He hit back to back kicks from nowhere to win his first world title. Here’s your “it’s Survivor Series so Shawn has to reference Montreal with a Sharpshooter” Sharpshooter. This has been all Shawn so far. Say it with me: as I type that Orton takes over.

Orton is very boring. That’s all there is to it. However, since he looks like a statue and can cut decent promos, Vince decides to keep putting him in big matches with this ridiculous Viper gimmick which more or less consists of him sliding around the ring before the RKO. It’s an excuse for not having to come up with something creative. Orton vs. Cena and HHH is about as boring of a pair of feuds as you’re ever going to find.

JR then has the nerve to say that this is a pure wrestling match. No Jim, it’s really not. This is a match that has an extra gimmick added to it because no one in their right mind believed that HBK would lose to Orton without it. Orton is just flat out awful in this gimmick of his and something needs to be changed, fast. Naturally, that means that Orton will be the same guy going into Mania 30. Oh look it’s a chinlock. What is the appeal of this?

To be fair, Orton is a bit better now, but around this time he was just flat out boring. Now he’s just mostly boring. Ok, for the love of goodness, WE GET THAT ORTON’S DAD IS IN THE HALL OF FAME! He was a horrible character and did nothing of note, ever. He’s another great example of the Hall of Fame being a complete joke. Anyway, Shawn initiates the ending sequence but gets dropkicked with one of three moves Orton can actually do really well.

In what’s a pretty cool move, Shawn sets for the superkick and fakes Orton out to get him to drop down so Shawn can hook a small package. That was really smart and makes perfect sense. In something that really surprises me, Shawn uses a crossface. This is a mere four months after Benoit and in the middle of the investigation into his death. I guess that this was before the whole thing came out. Michaels goes even crazier by putting on an ankle lock. Man he’s going nuts here.

He gets the heel hook but Orton gets out. DAng , Orton is better with submission than Lesnar is. Something occurs to me. If Orton gets disqualified, HBK gets the belt right? Why doesn’t Shawn get one of his buddies to come out and blast him with a chair or something? Man this face thing getting in the way of something that makes sense.

As he goes for a figure four, Shawn is kicked into the post. After a very brief counter, the RKO ends it. Afterwards Orton yells at Shawn and picks him up, naturally getting kicked in the head before Shawn leaves. Well that was a pretty basic ending.

Rating: D+. I get that some people would like this match, but I just could not get into it at all. There’s no drama, there’s one decent looking spot with the moonsault, there are tons of dead spots, and the whole thing just falls short. There just was no reason at all to watch this, plain and simple. They weren’t going to put the belt on Shawn so quick. Earlier tonight in the Punk match you had a good match that was a token defense.

This is the same, but this was far more boring. It’s a great example of a good match like this and a bad one. Jericho would come back in less than a month to save Raw and have more bland matches with Orton. Vince, get it through your head: two surefire hall of fame wrestlers in Jericho and Shawn can only pull ok matches out of Orton. That simply can’t be a coincidence.

Recap of Batista vs. Taker: they’ve fought a bunch of times and split most of them, but they just think the other is a swell guy. Yep, that’s about it.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Remember this is Hell in a Cell. Taker is the challenger here. JBL actually does some good analysis of what both guys need to do to win. He then ruins that by saying “oh that’s a clothesline!” Well thanks for that great brilliance there Johnny boy. Naturally Batista isn’t afraid of Taker. Less than three minutes in we have a chair brought in from under the ring. Or would it be out from under the ring? Whatever. Taker controls the majority of the opening part of the match.

Batista takes a chair shot to the throat and has some faint blood from his mouth. I know there’s not much being said here but the opening to this is solid which makes it difficult to make fun of. They’re trying to play up the experience/skill of Taker vs. pure power of Batista. That’s not a bad idea at all. As usual the rules of where you can pin someone here change per match, but I’d assume that it’s only in the ring. Cole implies it’s falls count anywhere.

They’re focusing a lot more on wrestling here than violence, which is fine. There’s certainly more than one way to have a good cell match and this is one of those options. Taker gets the Triangle Choke and Batista starts waving his arm and slapping the mat which looks a lot like tapping to me. He gets the ropes which apparently is a rope break. Even the announcers say that’s not correct. Batista is bleeding horribly.

After Batista gets some weapons shots in to take control, he gets caught in the Last Ride for two. This is a good match. The chokeslam gets two. He goes for the Tombstone but Batista does the leg wiggle of doom to get out and hit a spinebuster to take over again. A table is brought in as I begin to think: do those really help? I mean think about it. They kind of break your fall.

When you’re in a move like a powerbomb or something, the impact of the move is based on the amount of momentum built up when you’re coming down right? Well if there’s a table there blocking your way, doesn’t it stop a lot of the momentum? The impact of going through the table would hurt, but since you keep going anyway, it’s not going to hurt that much. Think of it like this: what hurts worse, taking a short ride and falling through a table, or taking a long ride and landing on something solid?

It doesn’t make a lot of sense to me, but I guess it can look good or something like that. Now we get to something else that’s kind of stupid. Batista sets up the table and hits a regular powerbomb through it (they call it the Batista Bomb but I can let that one go). If he had Taker that weakened, why not just hit the regular Batista Bomb and not give Taker the extra recovery time? Batista kicks out of the Tombstone, which makes him the second guy ever (Shawn at Mania 25) to kick out of all three finishers.

Shawn took it a step further though as he got out of Hell’s Gate as well. A Tombstone of the stairs should do it but the cameraman pulls the referee out and of course it’s Edge, returning from whatever injury he was out with. A camera shot to the head of Taker followed by a conchairto and Batista keeps the belt. Seriously, that’s the ending? Edge posing takes us out.

Rating: A-. This was a very good match until the ending. These guys have some solid chemistry together and showed it off tonight. Most Cell matches have zero story to them but this one did, which goes to show that you can have good wrestling and storytelling in a match like this and include weapons and blood.

That’s a big flaw in a lot of gimmick matches today: they forget they’re wrestling and just have high spots. Edge interfering really brings this down though as I wanted a clean win for someone. This was very good though and easily the best match at Survivor Series in a good while.

Overall Rating: B-. This is another example of a show where the grades don’t give an accurate representation of the whole show. I know I graded a lot of them low, but at the same time the whole show turned out to be pretty good I thought. The main event helped a lot as it was an excellent match. It goes to show you what a main event is capable of.

I know some people are going to think I’m an idiot for my Shawn vs. Orton grade, but the issue I have is simple: it was overbooked. Seriously, does a guy like Shawn need gimmicks in order to get over? You tell him how long he has and the finish and let him take care of the rest. The show certainly isn’t bad, but it’s hardly a classic. Batista and Taker is worth going out of your way to see, but while the rest is certainly good, it’s not must see. Recommended though.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 9, 2020
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe

We are less than two weeks away from Survivor Series and that means it is time to find something to talk about for the show. So much of the build is spent on the Raw vs. Smackdown elimination match and there is almost nothing else going on. That doesn’t make for the most thrilling shows and unfortunately I don’t know if WWE is going to do much to fix it. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Randy Orton attacking Drew McIntyre last week with the Fiend being somewhere on the outside looking in.

Opening sequence.

Here are Miz and John Morrison for MizTV. Miz is excited about tonight’s six man main event when the two of them team with Randy Orton against Drew McIntyre and New Day. Big things are happening, and Morrison thinks that might mean cashing in the briefcase. That’s a possibility, but also that Miz and Mrs. debuts this week. Miz wants to bring out the guests but here’s Orton to interrupt.

Orton isn’t happy because he wants to get his hands on McIntyre but now Miz is teasing cashing in the briefcase. He remembers the time when he threw Miz out of the locker room and then Miz went down to wrestle in the minor leagues. Orton turns his back on them and says try it but Miz says Orton needs to stop making it about himself.

It could go big for all three of them, because Miz and Morrison could get a Tag Team Title shot after tonight’s main event. Cue New Day to laugh off the idea and get in, where Orton hits a RKO on Kofi and Woods is sent outside. McIntyre runs in but gets hit with the briefcase and an RKO. Total mentions of the Hurt Business, who pinned New Day last week, or Orton’s match with Roman Reigns at Survivor Series for that matter: zero.

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Riddle vs. Elias vs. Jeff Hardy

For the final spot on the team. Before the match, Elias talks about how he had a vision of becoming the final member of the team. For now though, he is going to sing a song and looks towards the entrance for the interruption. He does it a few more times and then starts, which finally draws out Jeff’s entrance. I chuckled a bit, which is destroyed as soon as I see that it’s actually Riddle instead of Matt Riddle.

They trade rollups to start until Riddle is sent to the apron. Elias knocks him outside and posts Riddle before running Jeff over. We take a break and come back with Elias hammering on both of them until Hardy hits back to back atomic drops. A quick Drift Away gets two on Hardy with Riddle diving in to make the save. Riddle kicks Elias down for two but can’t get Bro Derek on Jeff. Instead Elias knocks Jeff to the floor and it’s the Bro Derek to finish Elias at 8:49.

Rating: C-. Riddle (erg) is the best choice of the ones they had available here but it’s not like the Survivor Series match has any heat on it. I know this kind of thing happens every year but there is just nothing going on with this year’s version. I’m not sure how much better they can make it with just a few shows to go, but Riddle getting on the team helps a bit.

AJ Styles is in the back and says of course he’s happy with Riddle being on the team. Sheamus comes in to say he doesn’t like this. Styles is NOT his captain, and here’s Braun Strowman to say the same.

Retribution talks about how they respect Ricochet but the team has been forgotten. They were never given the chance and they will not stop until they shut you down. Noted. Now go lose again.

We look at the Hurt Business beating New Day last week.

Drew Gulak comes up to the Hurt Business and offers his services because the 24/7 Title could make the team that much better. MVP: “Are you serious?” They find out that Drew is wearing a clip on tie, which is due to needing to be ready to run to protect the title. The beating is on in a hurry….and here’s R-Truth to get the title back.

Veterans Day video.

Lana vs. Shayna Baszler

Lana looks scared to come to the ring and we see a montage of her being put through the announcers’ table time after time. Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke are on commentary. Lana jumps on Shayna’s back to start and gets kneed in the corner for her efforts. Shayna throws her around again but misses another knee in the corner. That means a kick to the face and the stomp to the arm connects. Another knee into the Kirifuda Clutch makes Lana tap at 1:50. As expected.

Post match Nia Jax loads up the announcers’ table but Mandy and Dana scare Shayna and Nia off. I’m having a bit of trouble buying that as realistic.

Post break Lana thanks Mandy and Dana, who tell her to stay out of their way.

Here’s AJ Styles for a Survivor Series team meeting. AJ, with his large friend, brings out the rest of the team (Keith Lee, Riddle Braun Strowman and Sheamus) and the arguments are on in a hurry. Strowman threatens to let Sheamus have these hands so Sheamus says bring it. Riddle says that AJ is the skipper, Lee (Riddle: “Happy birthday Keith!”) is Bro Lee and Sheamus is Fire Face, because his face gets rid. Sheamus: “So what’s your code name? Dopey?” Riddle: “Yeah!”

AJ cuts this off and says what they’re up against on Smackdown. Sheamus should be worried about Jey Uso and if Strowman isn’t paying attention, he’ll bow down to King Corbin. This gets their attention but they don’t like AJ saying he’s captain. AJ says he’s talked to Adam Pearce and tonight it’s Sheamus/Strowman vs. Riddle/Lee with himself as guest referee. Saxton: “This is going to be a catastrophe. This is never going to work.”

Keith Lee/Riddle vs. Sheamus/Braun Strowman

AJ Styles is guest referee and Sheamus bounces off of Lee to start. Riddle comes in to strike away in the corner but Sheamus drives him into the other corner to take over. Strowman comes in to step on Riddle’s hair and it’s already back to Sheamus to hammer away. AJ yells at Sheamus for getting too violent and Riddle accidentally knocks him down. Back up and Riddle does it again, meaning it’s time for Lee and Strowman to get in a fight of their own.

The large friend gets in the ring and we take a break. Back with Strowman chinlocking Riddle before hitting him with a toss suplex. Strowman’s charge hits post though (he never learns) and it’s Lee coming in for running splashes in the corner. Sheamus is thrown into Strowman and it’s a Spirit Bomb to put Riddle onto Sheamus in a crash. A heck of a clothesline drops Strowman for two but Sheamus is back with a jumping knee to Lee.

The Brogue Kick puts Lee on the floor but Riddle grabs a German suplex for two on Sheamus. Riddle goes after Strowman on the apron though and it’s Sheamus running him over again. The Brogue Kick is loaded up but Strowman tags himself in and throws Riddle around some more. The running powerslam is loaded up, though this time it’s Sheamus tagging himself in. A Brogue Kick knocks Sheamus off the apron and it’s a rollup to give Riddle the pin on Sheamus at 12:24.

Rating: C. This is rapidly approaching the levels of Money in the Bank for most pointless wastes of time in all of the WWE calendar. The matches aren’t bad but we’re sitting here watching these people argue over who is captain in a match where they can’t get physical with their opponents in a match over brand supremacy. If this is the best they can come up with for Survivor Series, maybe it’s time to come up with a very new concept for the pay per view.

Post match Lee and Riddle show some respect.

Alexa Bliss is playing with some flowers in the back when Nikki Cross comes up. She apologizes for not being there when Bliss needed her but Bliss says she’ll get Cross an invitation to the Fun House for a play date. Cross says Fiend is evil and it’s time to pick either her or the Fiend. Bliss blows flowers in her face and picks Fiend before walking away smiling. If Nikki didn’t get the hint before this, that’s not going to change her mind.

Next week: Hurt Business gets a Tag Team Title shot against New Day. Well at least they addressed it.

Here are MVP and Bobby Lashley to, believe it or not, talk about Survivor Series. MVP talks about the champion vs. champion match, where Lashley is going to show that the United States Title is superior to the Intercontinental Title. Lashley didn’t hear Sami talking on Smackdown because Sami knows what is going to happen at Survivor Series.

Cue Titus O’Neil of all people to interrupt, because he isn’t happy that his offer to join the Hurt Business was turned down. MVP says he respects O’Neil for his charity work and as a result he has a chance to walk away right now. Titus says he isn’t leaving and gets fired up to ask where the pride is in being US Champion if he won’t defend the title. Lashley says Titus can have a shot, but it’s going to be his first and last.

US Title: Titus O’Neil vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending and MVP says this is taking place above the ring rather than beneath it. Titus unloads on Lashley in the corner but Lashley runs him over. The Hurt Lock goes on and Titus taps at 1:08.

Sheamus rants about what happened in the tag match to Drew McIntyre. He can’t stand anyone on his team almost as much as he despises New Day. Drew does the clap and Sheamus calls him a lunatic. They talk about the old days when they teamed together and agree to have some pints together later.

Asuka vs. Nia Jax

Non-title. Before the match, we got to the back where Nia and Shayna Baszler argue over who the team leader is (AGAIN) with Nia saying she’ll dominate Survivor Series and then beat Asuka to become Raw Women’s Champion. The rest of the Raw women’s team is at ringside. Asuka starts fast with an Octopus hold into an armbar but Nia takes her to the floor. That means a swing into the barricade to drop Asuka hard and we take a break. Back with Asuka grabbing a guillotine choke but getting reversed into a suplex.

The running splash in the corner gets two on Asuka, who has to bridge out of the near fall. Asuka’s hurricanrana gives her two of her own and there’s the running hip attack for one. Nia is right back with a powerbomb but gets a little too cocky with the cover, allowing Asuka to grab a cross armbreaker. Lana and Baszler get on the apron with Baszler grabbing the Clutch so Asuka hip attacks both of them. The Samoan drop is loaded up but Asuka reverses into the Asuka Lock, drawing in Baszler for the DQ at 7:26.

Rating: C. This was every Nia match you’ve seen with someone trying to slay the giant. That has been the case for months now and it is probably going to be the case with every match Jax will be doing for months, because it’s all she does. I like Asuka a lot, but I feel like I’ve seen this same match from Nia since she was down in NXT. Find something new, because the impact is gone.

Post match Nia and Shayna clean house and it’s another Samoan drop to put Lana through the announcers’ table (eight). Nia says Lana should quit because she’s dragging the team down.

We look back at the opening segment.

R-Truth is defending the 24/7 Title in a seven way match, which he calls a 24/7 Title Seven Camera DQ Photo Shoot. After a quick correction, he wants to know what he’s supposed to do with the clip on tie.

Andrade says he is going to fight for every woman when he gets in the ring. This one woman though should get everything that he wants though and has a rose for her.

24/7 Title: R-Truth vs. Drew Gulak vs. Tucker vs. Erik vs. Lince Dorado vs. Gran Metalik vs. Akira Tozawa

Truth is defending and gets jumped to start. Everyone else brawls and Tozawa rolls Truth up to win the title at 28 seconds.

Post match Erik wins the title.

Gulak wins the title.

Tucker wins the title.

Gulak wins the title.

Tucker wins the title.

Gulak and Truth go after the title and the brawl breaks out until Metalik hits a top rope elbow to win the title.

Dorado turns on Metalik to win the title.

Truth wins the title and runs off.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ricochet

They go right at it to start with an exchange of early strikes. Ricochet starts flipping around and gets knocked down, meaning it’s off to an early chinlock. Back up and Ricochet scores with a backdrop but gets sent out to the apron. Ricochet pulls Ali out there with him and hits a headscissors to the floor. The rest of Retribution glares at Ricochet and Ali grabs a running….well we’re not sure as they couldn’t wait one more second before going to a break.

Back with Ricochet fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught with a running neckbreaker for two. Ricochet fights out of another chinlock and rolls some northern lights suplexes. He keeps spinning into a brainbuster for two and takes Ali up top, only to get caught in a super Backstabber (geez) for two more. Ricochet is back up with a reverse hurricanrana but goes up top for a very corkcrewy give onto Retribution. The Phoenix splash misses though and Ali grabs a Koji Clutch to knock Ricochet out at 13:57.

Rating: B-. Hokey freaking smoke Retribution won a match. I mean it only took five people to beat one and it was because Ricochet went after the team instead of going for the win but they did manage to win. That’s as good as you can get for Retribution here and somehow it’s a step in the right direction.

Adam Pearce tells Randy Orton that he is defending the title against Drew McIntyre next week on Raw. Orton shoves him up against the wall and says since Pearce is just a messenger, he can tell the staff to go to h***.

Randy Orton/Miz/John Morrison vs. Drew McIntyre/New Day

Morrison and Woods start things off with a quick double team putting Morrison down. Miz comes in and gets taken down as well, sending him over to Orton for a tag, though Orton is not exactly interested. Instead it’s back to Morrison, who gets taken down with a standing stomp. Everything breaks down and Miz and Morrison are sent to the floor. The big double dive takes them down again (though Woods seemed to get caught in the ropes and might not have made contact whatsoever).

Back from a break with Morrison hitting an Alberto double stomp to drive Woods into the apron. Morrison hits something like a Samoan drop on Woods so Miz comes back in, only to still not get a tag from Orton. The delay lets Woods fight up and bring in McIntyre to clean house. A double overhead belly to belly suplex sends Miz and Morrison flying, followed by the Future Shock to Morrison.

McIntyre stares down at Orton and begs him to make his day. Orton teases tagging in but walks away instead. Morrison hits a crazy flip dive onto Woods but the Flying Chuck is knocked out of the air with the Glasgow Kiss. The Claymore pins Morrison at 13:26, with McIntyre glaring at Orton during the cover.

Rating: C-. This was the latest match in a series tonight with very low stakes, if there were any there whatsoever. I know they’re teasing tensions between Miz and Orton, but unless that cash-in is taking place really soon (and to be fair it may be), I’m not sure how much interest there was in having these people fight. Orton vs. McIntyre has been set up for months now, while New Day and Hurt Business, who have a title match next week, didn’t even look at each other tonight. That should be an easy one, but I guess teasing a cash-in which might not come for months is more important.

Overall Rating: D. I know Raw is bad a lot more often than not, but this was a rare example where I really felt like I wasted my time. The wrestling was acceptable all night long and none of the matches were terrible (Ricochet vs. Ali was good) but I have no idea what almost any of this did to make me want to watch next week’s show or Survivor Series.

The Raw team is fighting over who is the real leader, and in case you haven’t heard that story enough, Shayna Baszler and Nia Jax are having the exact same argument. Riddle is now on the team, though is there any actual interest in that match? Lashley talked a bit of trash about Sami Zayn and then squashed Titus O’Neil. Lana has now been put through eight tables by Jax, but I’m sure that big moment where she does it once will be worth it. The main event was just there, as they desperately try to make me care about Money in the Bank and fail more miserably every time.

Survivor Series was mentioned in passing a few times and Fiend was nowhere in sight. It’s like Survivor Series is this weird pit stop they have to make on the way to their next show, and that is the case with far too many pay per views this year. Either find a better way to present Survivor Series or just make it whatever other generic pay per view your team of 38 writers come up with in ten seconds, because this is approaching Money in the Bank levels of wasting my time.

Results

Riddle b. Elias and Jeff Hardy – Bro Derek to Elias

Shayna Baszler b. Lana – Kirifuda Clutch

Riddle/Keith Lee b. Sheamus/Braun Strowman – Rollup to Sheamus

Bobby Lashley b. Titus O’Neil – Hurt Lock

Asuka b. Nia Jax via DQ when Shayna Baszler interfered

Akira Tozawa b. R-Truth, Tucker, Drew Gulak, Erik, Lince Dorado and Gran Metalik – Rollup to R-Truth

Mustafa Ali b. Ricochet – Koji Clutch

Drew McIntyre/New Day b. Miz/John Morrison/Randy Orton – Claymore to Morrison

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

205 Live
Date: November 6, 2020
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

This show has been getting a little bit better as a result and that is a good thing to see. Things have started taking a familiar but still somewhat new direction and hopefully we get to see a good show this week again. I’m not sure what that is going to entail, but the former Evolve guys are at least something new. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Ashante Adonis vs. Mansoor

They lock up to start with Mansoor taking him to the ropes for a shove. An armbar works a bit better on Adonis but he gets caught in a front facelock. Adonis grabs a flapjack but gets knocked off the top for the crash to the floor. Mansoor’s dropkick through the ropes connects for two back inside as the pace has picked up.

Back in and Mansoor grabs a front facelock of his own and they even tease a knockout for a change. That’s broken up with a faceplant and Adonis hits a heck of a dropkick. A high crossbody into a kick to the head sets up a small package for two on Mansoor but he catches Adonis on top. The electric chair Death Valley Driver finishes Adonis at 8:06.

Rating: C+. Again, Mansoor continues to be one of the best and most consistently solid wrestlers around here so hopefully he gets an upgrade in the near future. Adonis has been doing fine as well and it s a good example of taking one of the dozens of people you have on the roster and turning them into something. If WWE could do that more often, it’s almost scary to imagine how fast they could restock the shelves.

Post match, respect is shown.

Curt Stallion and August Grey are ready to take care of Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese later tonight.

Santos Escobar says next week is the 205^th episode of 205 Live so we’ll be seeing a five way match for a future Cruiserweight Title shot. I’ve heard worse ideas.

Tony Nese/Ariya Daivari vs. Curt Stallion/August Grey

Nese drives Grey into the corner to start and it’s Daivari coming in for some loud chops. Stallion comes in off a blind tag though and it’s time to work on Daivari’s taped up elbow. A double stomp to the chest gets two on Daivari but Nese gets in a cheap shot from the apron to take over. Daivari’s neckbreaker gets two and Nese blasts Stallion in the face for two more.

Stallion grabs a small package for two though and rolls straight over for the hot tag to Grey. House doesn’t get a chance to be cleaned though as Nese gets in a shot from the apron and the Lionsault connects for two. Daivari suplexes Grey but pulls him up at two, which can’t be a good idea. Nese’s chinlock keeps Grey down and Daivari’s follows, though it doesn’t work so well.

Nese splashes Grey on the back and puts on a bodyscissors Grey, who elbows his way to freedom. The hot tag brings in Stallion to clean house and everything breaks down. Stallion gets sent outside so Grey has to fight both of them at once, which actually works for a change. Back up and Stallion hits a heck of a suicide dive to drive Daivari into the announcers’ table. Nese sends Stallion hard into the steps though and he heads back inside, only to get rolled up for two. The kickout sends Grey into the ropes, where Daivari gets in a cheap shot with a foreign object to give Nese the pin at 12:57.

Rating: B-. This was one of the better matches in recent 205 Live time as they had time, a formula and some cheating to make the veterans look like they couldn’t keep up with the younger team. The rookies need something like this and even though they didn’t win, the fact that they are having actual competitive matches serves as a good sign for their future.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s a good show with a pair of solid matches that is still off the air in just over half an hour. They are doing some nice things around here and you have a few interesting stories. I’m not sure what to expect from the show going forward, but at least we have some potential going forward. That hasn’t been the case in a long time, though I’m not sure if I have any reason to believe it’s sticking around. I’ll take what I can get though and that includes a good show here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: November 5, 2020
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

We’re back to normal around here, as we are over a week removed from Hell In A Cell, meaning that Smackdown can exist around here again. I’m not sure what we are going to see from the show, but odds are we are going to get some of the build to Survivor Series, which needs some help at this point. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Titus O’Neil vs. Erik

Titus continues to wrestle in pants instead of gear, which might be the most interesting thing to happen to him in years. They power each other around to start until Erik hits a running knee to the chest. Some shots to the back put Titus into the ropes until Titus throws him into the corner. Titus’ slam is no sold and Erik hits some crossface shots to the jaw. The chinlock goes on but Titus backdrops his way to freedom. Back up and Erik charges into the Clash of the Titus for the pin at 5:08 (it’s as sudden as it sounds).

Rating: D. Questionable (Maybe?) ending aside, there was only so much that you can get out of a five minute match between two guys who aren’t great at the singles thing. This is on the bad end of Main Event and I really hope that isn’t the norm again, because these matches can be moderately entertaining. That’s not what we got here though and it’s not a good sign.

Long video on Roman Reigns beating Jey Uso inside the Cell.

From Smackdown.

Here are Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman to open things up with Jey Uso waiting in the ring. After a look back at Reigns beating Uso in the Cell match, Jey takes the mic from Heyman to say that he didn’t quit. Reigns says he told him so and that he made Jey quit like he promised. Jey can’t believe what Reigns did and says Reigns isn’t tougher than him. Reigns calls this the kind of thing that this is what you have to do to become champion.

The entire family, from the oldest to the youngest, is behind him and if Jey doesn’t do as he promises, he’s out of the family. He knows Jey wants to bash his skull in right now but what can he do. Jey looks near tears and shouts that he hates Reigns. Why does Reigns have to do this? Reigns knows Jey hates him right now but by the end of the night, Jey will fall in line. Reigns was outstanding here, with his voice really low and threatening while knowing he was completely in control.

From Smackdown.

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Jey Uso vs. Daniel Bryan

Jey doesn’t look happy, even as he shoulders Bryan down to start. Bryan is back with a wristlock but Jey knocks him into the corner. That just earns him the moonsault over Jey into Bryan’s running clothesline, followed by the YES Kicks. Jey gets knocked outside and here are Reigns and Heyman, sending Jey into quite a bit of anger as we take a break.

Back with Bryan hitting a running dropkick into the Tree of Woe. Jey slips out and starts kicking away but the Superfly Splash hits knees. The LeBell Lock goes on until Jey gets to the rope to save himself before too long. The running dropkick connects in the corner but Jey is right back with a superkick. Now the Superfly Splash can connect for the clean pin at 9:42.

Rating: C+. I was surprised when Jey pinned AJ Styles a few weeks back but this was almost shocking, as Bryan is one of the top stars on Smackdown and Jey pinned him completely clean in a pretty decent match. That’s a good way to make a star, though it makes Reigns look even bigger after he destroyed Jey in back to back matches. I’m curious to see what this means for Jimmy, as it’s hard to imagine this all being forgotten as soon as Jimmy is back.

Post match Reigns comes to the ring, where Jey says he’s with him. Jey acknowledges Reigns a the head of the table and superkicks Bryan, setting up another Superfly Splash. Jey shouts about understanding now and says he loves Reigns too. Reigns points to Bryan and says make him understand. Jey takes Bryan outside and puts him onto the announcers’ table for another Superfly Splash. Reigns looks happy as Jey hammers away to end the show. Points for doing this after a win. It’s so annoying to have someone lose clean and THEN make them look awesome. This worked well and that had something to do with it.

We get a very quick look at Braun Strowman qualifying for the Raw Survivor Series team and the following brawl.

Humberto Carrillo vs. Lince Dorado

Gran Metalik is here with Dorado. They go after each others’ legs to start until Dorado slaps on a headlock. A flying mare takes Carrillo down but he’s back up with an armdrag into an armbar. Carrillo’s springboard is dropped out of the air though and we take a break. Back with Carrillo caught in a chinlock before Dorado puts a boot in his back and pulls on the arms.

Dorado sends him into the corner but misses a top rope splash, allowing Carrillo to hit a jumping enziguri. A springboard missile dropkick gets two but Dorado counters a powerbomb into a faceplant. Now the top rope splash connects for two on Carrillo, who is back up with a high crossbody for the same. The torture rack faceplant finishes Dorado at 12:42.

Rating: C. Perfectly watchable luchador match here and they worked well together. That being said, Carrillo continues to have the charisma of a steering wheel and Dorado isn’t exactly thrilling either. There isn’t much to get out of a match like this but they did as well as they could with what they had.

From Smackdown.

Here are Murphy and Aalyah, arm in arm, for a chat. Murphy says that as a man, he needs to apologize to Rey and Dominick face to face. Neither of them come out but here’s Seth Rollins instead. He knows that the Mysterios will never accept him but Rollins will always forgive him. Rollins can always accept Murphy, and he’ll accept Aalyah as well, no matter what her last name is. Cue Dominick to jump Rollins but Murphy pulls him off and goes after Rollins.

Dominick goes after Murphy as Rollins bails up the ramp. Rey comes in to help, but Aalyah gets in the way of the 619. She says she loves Murphy and Rey is distraught. He’s so upset that he speaks Spanish but Aalyah won’t go with them. Rey asks one more time for her to come with them but Aalyah kisses Murphy, which makes Rollins smile from the stage.

From Raw.

Drew McIntyre vs. Miz/John Morrison

Miz tries to hammer on McIntyre in the corner to start but is toss into the same corner. McIntyre shows him how to really beat someone up and then punches Morrison down for a bonus. Now it’s Morrison being pulled in but Miz sneaks in with a chop block. A double backbreaker has McIntyre in more trouble but he sends them outside anyway. The reverse Alabama Slam sends Morrison face first into the ramp and we take a break.

Back with Miz and Morrison managing to take it outside again and sending McIntyre hard into the barricade. Morrison’s springboard corkscrew splash gets one on McIntyre and we hit the chinlock. McIntyre fights up again and puts Morrison on the top rope. The elbows knock McIntyre into the Tree of Woe but McIntyre muscles himself up for a release German superplex.

McIntyre is right back up with the spinebuster, meaning Morrison has to shooting star press the cover for the break. Morrison is knocked outside again so Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale for two instead. McIntyre knocks Morrison down again and hits the Future Shock on Miz. The Claymore is loaded up but Morrison pulls Miz outside. The big flip dive means it doesn’t matter and it’s the Claymore to finish Miz at 15:35.

Rating: D+. I like everyone in the match but it felt like they didn’t have much to do during the middle section, leaving them to do stuff more than once to fill in the time. This was more of an exercise in patience until McIntyre got the win, as there was no way he was losing again here, especially to Miz and Morrison. Even WWE isn’t screwing that up (so far).

Post match here’s Orton with the RKO to McIntyre. Orton poses but Fiend’s laugh ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. And Main Event is back to everything that makes the show feel worthless: nothing matches that don’t mean a thing either before, during or after the bell and recaps of how bad things have been around the company as of late. I can’t say I’m overly surprised as Main Event has never shown any consistency, but it’s a bit disappointing after what we had been seeing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 3, 2020
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Madison Rayne

You don’t get to say this very often but it’s time to find out who shot John E. Bravo last week. Wrestlers are rarely shot or possibly even killed off, but now it is time to play detective, and I have a bad feeling that is going to mean a lot of Tommy Dreamer. But hey, maybe we can get some Eric Young thrown in there too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a sepia tone recap of the build to the wedding and Bravo being awful to his wedding party. That’s a really good idea as I hadn’t been thinking of all those details and it gives it more of an “anyone could have done it” vibe.

Scott D’Amore gets an update on Bravo, who is in critical but stable condition. Tommy Dreamer comes up, dressed as an old school detective, and it’s time to find out whodunit. D’Amore thinks being shot doesn’t sound too bad.

Opening sequence.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Su Yung

Purrazzo is challenging in her Bound For Glory rematch and Kimber Lee is with her. It’s a brawl to start and neither can hit their finisher in the very early going. Yung sends her flying and it’s already time for the bloody glove. That takes too long though as it’s time for Purrazzo to start in on the arm.

The arm is wrapped around the bottom rope but Yung is back up with an anklescissors into the corner. They trade running shots to the face with Purrazzo getting the better of things but a double clothesline puts both of them down. Back up and Purrazzo’s cradle piledriver is blocked, setting up the Mandible Claw. Lee slides in a chair, which Yung picks up and uses on Purrazzo for the DQ at 4:30.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but unlike Rich Swann vs. Eric Young’s quick rematch last week, I could go for a rematch here. The creepy monster vs. the technical master is an interesting way to go and their match at Bound For Glory was pretty good. They were smart not to waste anything here and keeping it quick was simple. This could be a big showdown/main event later, so save the real match for that.

Post match Yung uses the chair to drop both of them and clear the ring.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

It’s time for Rhino and Heath to sign Heath’s contract with Scott D’Amore. One thing though: Heath is still hurt, so until that’s cleared up, he isn’t getting to sign. The two of them leave so here’s Barrister RD Reynolds to say that shouldn’t be Deonna Purrazzo’s rematch. D’Amore says she can have another rematch at Turning Point, where anything goes. Wrestling has an interesting understanding of how negotiations work.

Rich Swann comes in to see Eddie Edwards and even sings Eddie’s theme song. They have Sami Callihan and Eric Young tonight.

Chris Bey vs. Trey Miguel

They fight over arm control to start with Trey taking him down into an armbar. Bey flips out of a springboard wristdrag though and they trade armdrags. Both of them try one at the same time and go down to the mat for a….I guess it’s a layoff actually. Back up and a dropkick puts Bey on the floor but he trips Miguel down to take over.

A rake to the eyes and a running forearm to the back have Miguel in more trouble and it’s time to stand on his back for some posing. Back up and Trey dropkicks the leg out and hits a reverse 619. Bey crotches him on top but gets tied in the ropes for the Cheeky Nandos kick (which may have been blocked). Trey tries a charge but gets kicked away, setting up a diving cutter to give Bey the pin at 6:25.

Rating: C. I like both guys and it was nice to see them getting a little time to showcase themselves. They’re both young and talented and it’s great to see them in the ring. This is the kind of thing that can do something positive for their future and they had a nice enough match here when they got the chance.

It’s time for Locker Room Talk with Madison Rayne and Johnny Swinger talking about John E. Bravo being shot (you might think ATTEMPTED MURDER would get more attention on this show). Anyway it’s time to talk about the Women’s Tag Team Title tournament, with Madison having to tell Swinger to cool it with the tag team jokes.

Jordynne Grace and Tenille Dashwood (with Kaleb With A K) are the guests this week and Madison gets right to the point: they should be partners in the tournament. Grace is interested but Dashwood wants the titles for herself….so she asks Madison. That’s a deal, but Grace tosses away Kaleb With A K’s camera and leaves. Not that it matters as Swinger won’t get out of the shot.

Dreamer, in a deerstalker hat, accuses one of the referees of being the shooter. Johnny Swinger and Cody Deaner argue over who should be the next witness because they have a match tonight. Dreamer: “MATCH TI….” Cody: “Wrong show.” They’re both still suspects though so go have their match and then come back.

Here’s Rohit Raju with another Defeat Rohit challenge but he wants fresh meat. Cue TJP in street clothes but Rohit says no because TJP already had his shot. He does have an opportunity tonight though: an opportunity to get out of the ring. Rohit rants at TJP for taking up his time after he spent so much time scratching and clawing. TJP doesn’t think much of that and lists off all of his accomplishments so far. Now why should he be worried about Rohit? Well that’s because Rohit is the current X-Division Champion and TJP is a has been. TJP gets in his face and throws his tea in his face as the brawl is on. Sounds Turning Pointish.

Chris Sabin says Alex Shelley is fine but he finds it interesting that teams are having to divide and conquer the Motor City Machine Guns. He wants either member of XXXL one on one.

Rohit Raju and TJP rant to Scott D’Amore, who makes another match between them, but it’s TJP’s last shot as long as Rohit is champion.

Doc Gallows vs. Ethan Page

Karl Anderson and Josh Alexander are here too. Gallows shoves him down without much trouble to start and a shoulder puts Page on the floor. Back in and Gallows unloads on him in the corner, sending Page outside again. Page gets in again so Gallows mocks Page’s martial arts and knocks him outside a third time.

That’s not cool with Page, who comes back in and takes Gallows down to hammer away. A DDT gives Page two and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long so Page goes with a dropkick for two and it’s back to the chinlockery. That’s broken up in a hurry with Gallows fighting up and hitting a charge in the corner. Alexander posts Anderson for a distraction though and then comes in for the DQ at 6:22.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but it’s better than the wrestlers getting to trade one win after another back and forth. The North vs. the Good Brothers could be a heck of a showdown on a major stage and that might wind up being Hard To Kill. I’m not sure if it can be dragged out that long, but hopefully things get a little bit better if they are going that long.

Post match the Good Brothers clean house.

Swoggle says it’s time to be a star in wrestling but here’s Brian Myers to say this place is serious. That sends Swoggle into a rant about how Myers has been disrespecting Tommy Dreamer, because insert your own Dreamer is around too often joke. Myers throws down Swoggle’s book and shoves him over for a bonus.

Cody Deaner vs. Johnny Swinger

Cody runs him over to start and hits a hard clothesline for a bonus. Hold on though as Cody needs beer, allowing Swinger to choke him o the ropes. Some atomic drops have Swinger in trouble but a rake of the eyes breaks up the Dreamer DDT. Swinger goes outside and grabs his fanny pack to knock Deaner out at 3:01.

Rating: D. Nothing to this one of course, though Swinger selling the atomic drops was good stuff. Swinger continues to be someone who has no business being this entertaining and yet he keeps pulling it off. I could go for more of him like this and if it means loaded fanny packs, even more than that.

Here’s Moose to say that no one has taken the TNA World Title serious in six months. Some people say he took the title out of a trashcan but Moose lists off his resume, including his recent(ish) big wins. Granted they’re mainly ECW guys so I’m not sure how seriously I should be taking this. Now he has Rich Swann running around with the second most important title in this company. Come find him though and Moose will teach Swann what pain is. We see a clip of Moose attacking Willie Mack last week so Swann has been warned. Cue Mack for the brawl with Moose easily getting the better of things. Mack vs. Moose works.

In the back, Chris Bey comes up to Rich Swann and asks for a title shot. Swann seems interested but here’s Eddie Edwards to say it’s main event time.

Tommy Dreamer has narrowed his list down to ten suspects, most of whom were on Wrestle House. James Mitchell tries to say he couldn’t do it because he’s an angel but cracks up laughing. Taya says she is an angel, which is what Dreamer thinks makes her a perfect suspect. A bunch of mug shots take us out, making me think we’re in for another reality/competition show.

Here’s what’s coming next week and at Turning Point.

Rich Swann/Eddie Edwards vs. Sami Callihan/Eric Young

Swann and Callihan start things off with Sami knocking him into the corner. Everything breaks down in a hurry with Eddie and Swann hitting some dives to send us to an early break. Back with Eddie putting Callihan in a Boston crab for a flipping legdrop from Swann. Sami pops right back up and decks Sami, allowing the fast tag off to Young. Stomping and a neckbreaker give Young two and it’s back to Sami for a chinlock.

Young elbows Eddie in the face for two but Eddie gets in a Blue Thunder Bomb on Callihan. The partners are knocked off the apron, leaving Eddie to catch Swann with a running boot in the corner. The hot tag brings in Swann as everything breaks down. Swann gets to clean house and he hurricanranas Young off the ropes onto Callihan for two. A double Lethal Injection drops the villains and the real hot tag brings in Eddie to take over.

Eddie grabs a half crab on Young and Swann gets the Sharpshooter on Callihan. They tease tapping out but grab the arms to break it up. Young gets out and breaks it up so Eddie catapults him out to the floor. There’s the Backpack Stunner for two on Sami and the half crab goes back on. Cue Ken Shamrock to jump Swann (and possibly Young) for a distraction though, allowing Sami to hit the Cactus Special and pin Eddie at 10:57.

Rating: C+. Totally fine big name main event which is likely going to set up a bunch of stuff in the future. The main event scene is doing well at the moment and while Swann is still growing into a main event, points for trying someone new in the role, which has been a problem for a long time now. The evil trio will be fine enough for the short term, but they need a top villain.

Overall Rating: C-. It wasn’t their best show but there is enough going on to make me want to see where some of these things go. They seem to be in a bit of a holding pattern with some of the bigger stuff though and the Who Shot Bravo feels more like a vehicle for Dreamer than anything else. It should be fun though and if that’s the case, we should be in for a nice enough winter. Not a show you need to see here, but it was an acceptable two hours.

Results

Deonna Purrazzo b. Su Yung via DQ when Yung used a chair

Chris Bey b. Trey Miguel – Middle rope cutter

Doc Gallows b. Ethan Page via DQ when Josh Alexander interfered

Johnny Swinger b. Cody Deaner – Fanny pack to the head

Sami Callihan/Eric Young b. Eddie Edwards/Rich Swann – Cactus Special to Edwards

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2006
Date: November 26, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,400
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Another match of note on the show is Mickie James challenging Lita for the Women’s Championship in what would be Lita’s final match. Combining this with Trish Stratus leaving just a few months earlier, the Divas division was in a huge state of flux with the two biggest stars it ever had leaving in the span of a few months. Let’s get to it.

This is the 20^th show so we talk about tradition and all that jazz. Then it turns into a regular video about a PPV, but a good one.

Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad

Legends: Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, Ron Simmons, Dusty Rhodes

Spirit Squad: Kenny, Johnny, Nicky, Mikey

Slaughter is replacing a cancer ridden Roddy Piper. Actually he got very lucky as he got a concussion because of a Conchairto from Edge, and on the tests the cancer was found. Arn Anderson is here with the Legends and we get the awesome Horsemen music. The only member of the Squad (a group of male cheerleaders) still around is Nicky, more famous as Dolph Ziggler, so I’ll spare you from an explanation. Kenny is the only other one that stuck around after the team split up anyway.

Simmons and Mikey start things off and guess who wins the slugout. Ron beats up all of them but Mitch, the fifth member of the squad not in the match, interferes and gets Ron on the floor. Mitch’s distraction leads to Simmons getting counted out. Mitch (the other cheerleader) gets ejected but Simmons beats him up first. Anderson gets ejected as well for no apparent reason. The Philly fans are TICKED. Nicky comes in to face Sarge and he mocks the salute. Fan: “PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE!”

Sarge beats him up with ease and it’s off to Dusty for some gyrating and elbows to the arm. It’s Flair time and you know the Philly fans are all for that one. A chop later and it’s right back to Slaughter who hooks the Cobra Clutch, but Dusty and Kenny come in to fight, allowing Johnny to kick Sarge in the head to give Nicky a pin. Off to Dusty who hits the bionic elbow on Nicky for the immediate elimination, making it 3-2. Dusty gets caught in the corner but he gyrates it off.

The Flip Flop and Fly takes Kenny down but another elbow misses, giving Kenny a rollup (with a handful of jeans) pin. It’s Kenny/Johnny/Mikey vs. Flair now with Mikey starting first. Flair chops him into the corner but Mikey starts punching away. Ric hits a quick atomic drop and gets a rollup with feet on the ropes (now THAT is vintage Flair) for the elimination. Kenny gets in some shots but ducks his head and gets cradled for the pin, leaving Flair vs. Johnny. Less than a minute later it’s a Figure Four to give Flair the win.

Rating: C-. This was exactly what it was expected to be and that’s all it should have been. The legends were there to have a feel good nostalgia moment and get eliminated so Flair, the only one who had been active in the last three years or so, could knock out all of the Squad and give the fans a feel good moment. Also it’s only about ten minutes long so it’s not like this was anything major. It’s not a good technical match, but if that’s what you’re expecting here, you missed the point entirely. Besides, the Squad was gone literally the next night.

Post match the Squad beats down Flair and the Legends….are nowhere in sight. Kind of a downer.

We recap Benoit vs. Chavo. Benoit came back from an injury and won the US Title but Vickie and Chavo, his former friends, wanted nothing to do with him. Chavo and Vickie didn’t like Rey making his name off Eddie’s legacy, which is true but I don’t blame Rey for it. Chavo injured Rey’s knee (Mysterio needed time off for surgery) but when Benoit tried to make the save, the Guerreros weren’t happy. There was also some nonsense about Eddie’s estate which didn’t going anywhere.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero

Benoit, the champion, pounds away to start and hits a quick backbreaker for one. Some knees to the ribs set up a snap suplex for another two. Chavo comes back with a bunch of forearms and stomps in the corner, only to get caught in the Crossface. Vickie makes the save by putting Chavo’s boot on the rope. Chavo hits a pair of suplexes for two and it’s off to a chinlock.

Benoit comes out of it with a Samoan drop of all things but gets dropkicked right back down for two. Another suplex is countered and Benoit rolls some Germans to set up the swan dive. Vickie grabs Benoit’s foot and the distraction makes the dive miss, sending Chris’ head crashing into the mat again. Chavo suplexes him down (again) but the frog splash only gets two. Benoit loads up the Sharpshooter but gets kicked off into Vickie who is on the apron. There’s the Crossface and Chavo taps out.

Rating: D+. That’s likely a bit low but this was a dull match. Chavo came off as more of an annoyance than a challenge here and that never makes for an entertaining match. I still shudder whenever I see Benoit take a head shot like he did off the swan dive as I always wonder which shot was the point of no return for him.

Lita says that she’s done after tonight’s match (that’s actually true) and she’s glad it’s in front of these horrible fans in Philadelphia. Edge makes some Donovan McNabb jokes and says his team is going to take out Team DX. After he leaves, Cryme Tyme leaves Lita’s locker room with a box of her stuff.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Mickie James

Lita is defending and slaps Mickie in the face to start, causing Mickie to choke away in the corner. The champ comes back by literally throwing Mickie around which is a bit less than what you would expect from someone as talented as Lita. Mickie goes up and gets slammed off the top as this is one sided so far. The fans think Lita is a crack w****. Their words, not mine.

A quick snap suplex gets two for Lita as this continues to be slow. Off to a sleeper from Lita which is the last thing this match needed. Mickie gets in the ropes and avoids a charge in the corner. She goes up and is immediately suplexed down for two. Now the fans think Lita has herpes. Again, their words not mine. Mickie hits a SWEET spinning kick to take Lita’s head off followed by a fisherman’s suplex for two. Moonsault gets two for Lita but the Edgecution is countered, giving Mickie two. They trade rollups and Mickie hits the jumping DDT to retire Lita and win the title.

Rating: D. Most of that is for the ending with Lita’s head bouncing off the mat. Other than that, this was some pretty uninspired stuff. Lita left when she should have as she had nothing left to accomplish and no one like Trish to work with. Pretty terrible match here but it passed the torch to Mickie who was indeed the future of the division.

Lita asks for a microphone and makes Lillian tell the crowd to cheer for her. She doesn’t like being booed and is glad to get to leave in front of Philly because its fans suck. Here’s Cryme Tyme with the box of Lita’s stuff they stole earlier. They’re having a HO Sale and it’s cash only. The first item sold: Lita’s yeast infection medicine for one dollar.

Cryme Tyme realizes JBL is at the announce table and offer the goods to him. He says he’s the only person in America who doesn’t have some of Lita’s underwear so he gives them $100. The next item: Lita’s massager. That goes for 25 bucks and there’s only one thing left. It’s cheap, it’s wide, you can put your head in it: it’s Lita’s box. That goes for 20 bucks to end a hilarious segment.

Batista has nothing to say about the title match tonight. Booker attacked Batista at the contract signing and hit him in the throat with a scepter. After seeing a clip of it, Batista says he’s leaving tonight with the title.

Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO

Team DX: Shawn Michaels, HHH, Hardy Boys, CM Punk

Team Rated-RKO: Edge, Randy Orton, Johnny Nitro, Mike Knox, Gregory Helms

This is Punk’s first major match and Jeff is Intercontinental Champion. DX plays to the crowd for a LONG time before the heel entrances. The fans of course LOVE Punk, so he gets to ask if the fans are ready. Helms, the current Cruiserweight Champion, is feuding with Matt Hardy at this point. Knox, a big power guy with a beard, has a chick named Kelly Kelly with him at the moment and she’s an exhibitionist. Rated-RKO are the Raw Tag Team Champions too so most of the gold in the company is in this match.

HHH asks Kelly to flash him and has Shawn cover his eyes. Knox comes in to stop it but Shawn kicks him in the face to eliminate him. Shawn to HHH: “Who was that guy?” Points for a funny bit if nothing else. Nitro comes in to speed things up but Shawn slides to the floor and puts his arm around Melina. We’ve got a comedy match here people. Off to Jeff who works on Nitro’s arm to continue their recent feud.

Off to Matt so the Hardys can hit some nice double team stuff. Nitro finally gets in a shot to the face and it’s off to Helms. Matt is slammed off the top and it’s off to Edge to stomp on Matt. Well that’s appropriate. Back to Helms for a suplex and it’s immediately off to Orton. After some very basic stuff, here’s Nitro again so Melina can SCREECH. Matt hooks the Side Effect and there’s the tag to Punk. Punk immediately starts his strikes and hits the knee/bulldog in the corner.

Nitro blocks the Rock Bottom but the second attempt (with an assist from Matt) sets up the Vice for the tap out. Edge comes in to face Punk and the fans are very pleased. Punk pounds on him in the corner but Orton guillotines Punk on the top rope to give the heels their first advantage. Randy comes in and hits a dropkick for two before it’s back to Helms. After some knees to the face, Helms hits a one knee Codebreaker to put Punk down.

Back to Orton for a slugout with Punk, resulting in the RKO taking Punk down. Why Randy can’t cover immediately isn’t quite clear but Shawn makes the save anyway. Edge gets the tag but spears the buckle. JR: “That middle turnbuckle isn’t in the match!” Hot tag brings in HHH to face Helms and the beating is on fast. A facebuster puts Helms down but the Edge-O-Matic breaks up the Pedigree. Everything breaks down and Jeff and Shawn dive on Rated-RKO.

Matt comes in with the Twist on Helms followed by a Swanton to make it 5-2. The heels take their belts and walk but the Hardys will have none of that. Team DX take turns beating up both members and it’s Sweet Chin Music to eliminate Edge. So it’s Orton vs. five guys now and Randy tries to run, but the Hardys and Punk stop him. Back in and it’s Chin Music and the Pedigree to complete the sweep.

Rating: C-. This was entertaining but it’s kind of a questionable ending when you consider the captains were in a pretty big feud. The guy that gets the big rub here is Punk, as he goes from a guy on the C show to rubbing elbows with two of the biggest stars ever and one of the best tag teams ever. Fun match here but it didn’t really accomplish much.

We recap Kennedy vs. Undertaker. Kennedy is a very loud guy that likes to challenge legends and would become Mr. Anderson in TNA. Basically Kennedy wants to break the legend of Undertaker, or about the same thing as about half the feuds Undertaker has had in years. It’s a first blood match tonight because Kennedy busted Undertaker open on Smackdown recently. Kennedy got a blood bath from Undertaker’s magic powers.

Kennedy isn’t worried but MVP (think Deion Sanders) comes up and notices the Vaseline on Kennedy’s forehead. I guess the referee isn’t watching the interview.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker

Kennedy immediately drops to the floor to try to get an early advantage, but Undertaker punches him down as soon as they get back inside. We head back to the floor and Kennedy gets punched over the announcers’ table with Undertaker in total control. We head to the crowd and Undertaker hits a pair of headbutts. Back to ringside and Kennedy gets in his first big move by sending Undertaker into the steps.

Kennedy tries to dive off the apron but gets caught and rammed into the post. This has been almost all Undertaker so far. We head back in and Undertaker busts out a superplex to put Kennedy down. The offense looks good but shouldn’t Undertaker be going for the head? I don’t know if internal bleeding counts but it hasn’t been mentioned in any first blood match I’ve ever seen. Kennedy hits Undertaker low but Undertaker immediately comes back with a kick to the face.

A buckle was taken off somewhere in there by Kennedy but Undertaker sends him into it twice in a row. Kennedy kicks Undertaker low again and Kennedy is bleeding from the mouth. He rolls to the floor before the referee can see it and here’s MVP with a towel to clean up the blood. They start to walk away, but MVP throws Kennedy back in the ring which is payback for Kennedy doing the same thing to MVP on Smackdown.

Undertaker pounds away in the corner but Kennedy drops him face first on the exposed buckle. Kennedy starts pounding away but MVP brings in a chair to hit….someone. It winds up hitting Undertaker and busts him open to give Kennedy the upset win. The fans boo that out of the building because Undertaker is such a legend at this point.

Rating: C. This was a decent brawl but the ending, which was to advance Undertaker/Kane vs. MVP/Kennedy, kind of sucks. The feud just never worked because at the end of the day, it’s two guys who are career midcarders at this point against two former World Champions who can beat up anyone. Kennedy never got to the point where they wanted him to be due to various reasons, but this is the fifth former World Champion he had beaten.

Kennedy beats up Undertaker post match but Undertaker snaps up and pounds him down as well. Undertaker WHACKS him with the chair to get a gasp from the crowd. JBL LOSES IT as Kennedy gets beaten up even more and tombstoned.

Sharmell tells Booker to be excited because tonight is Batista’s last chance.

Team Cena vs. Team Big Show

John Cena, Kane, Bobby Lashley, Sabu, Rob Van Dam

Big Show, Test, MVP, Finlay, Umaga

It’s Philadelphia and we’ve got Sabu and RVD on one team so I think you can guess the crowd reactions. Cena is Raw World Champion and Big Show is ECW Champion. Umaga, a Samoan and formerly Jamal of 3 Minute Warning is still undefeated and a monster. Finlay is an Irish brawler.

Naturally Cena is booed out of the building by the hardcore crowd. Cena and Umaga start things off with Cena getting knocked to the floor. Everything breaks down and Umaga gets a monitor to knock out RVD for a DQ. Umaga also destroys the rest of Team Cena because that’s what savages do.

We finally get down to Finlay vs. RVD but it’s quickly off to Test for some bland big man power stuff. Back to Irishman for some stomping and then to really mix things up, MVP comes in and stomps as well. Van Dam is bleeding from the mouth as MVP puts on a chinlock. Rob comes back with a cradle for two and a spin kick to take MVP down. Van Dam kicks all of the heels including a LOUD one to Finlay. Test tries to ram RVD into the post but since he’s big and dumb, Test’s head goes into it instead. Kane chokeslams MVP and the Five Star gets the pin for Rob.

While Van Dam is getting up, Test immediately comes in and kicks his head off to make it 4-3. Test gets sent to the floor and Lashley spears him down, followed by a tornado DDT from Sabu back inside for the pin. Show immediately chokeslams Sabu to make it 3-2 and it’s time for the giants to fight. They both grabs chokeslam grips but here’s Hornswoggle (the Little Bastard at the moment) for a distraction. Finlay clocks Kane with his club so Show can pin Kane after a chokeslam. Starting with MVP’s pin, those five eliminations all came within less than two minutes. I didn’t skip anything in between.

To recap, it’s Show/Finlay vs. Cena/Lashley. Cena comes in to face the monster but is immediately taken down. Off to Finlay for a clothesline and some good old fashioned cheating. Show sends Cena flying off a headbutt and it’s back to the heel corner. After more of a beating, Cena fights them both off and makes the hot tag to Lashley. Powerslam is escaped but a spear puts Finlay down for two.

A double clothesline from Show puts Cena and Lashley down and here’s Hornswoggle again. Cena loads him up in the FU and in the distraction, Lashley spears Finlay down to make it 2-1. Both good guys take their turns on Show including stuff like double DDTs and double suplexes. JR calls Cena cock strong and I don’t want to know what that one means. Lashley breaks up the chokeslam with a spear and the FU gets the final pin.

Rating: D. As I was writing that, it felt like I was just saying what was happening and nothing special was going on. The reason it felt like nothing was going on was because nothing was going on. This match was as paint by numbers as you could ever ask for and that makes for a VERY dull match. Cena hitting the FU on Show is always worth seeing, but this didn’t work at all.

JR says that Lashley is debuting at Survivor Series tonight which is flat out wrong. To be a bit fair though, JR wasn’t on commentary for that match last year.

The Extreme Elimination Chamber is coming.

We recap Booker T vs. Batista. Booker won the King of the Ring and became a king with a bad British accent before winning the title off Rey Mysterio. He kept cheating to beat Batista and tonight is Batista’s last shot at the title unless he wins. Batista never lost the title in the first place and had to drop it due to injury, so tonight is his last chance to regain what he believes is still his.

Before the match, Teddy comes out and says that if Booker gets counted out or DQ’ed, he loses the title.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Booker T

Booker is defending of course. Batista jumps him in the aisle and the referee says you have to get it in the ring. Why? Batista can win the title via DQ so no he doesn’t need to get it in the ring. Also the ruling said Booker loses if he gets counted out. It said nothing about him losing by countout so would a draw give Batista the title? Booker fires off some chops in the corner and is immediately punched in the face for his efforts. A suplex puts Booker down but he escapes an early Batista Bomb attempt.

After Booker gets back in, Batista hits a clothesline for two. This isn’t really working so far. Booker finally comes back with a hot shot to take over before sling shotting Batista’s throat into the bottom rope. Batista comes back with some right hands but Booker pokes him in the eye. We’re about five minutes into this and it’s not clicking at all. Big Dave comes out of nowhere with a side slam for two followed by a Jackhammer.

A Boss Man Slam gets two for Batista and they head to the apron to slug it out. Cole brings up a good question: what happens if there’s a double countout or double DQ? Egads now I’m thinking like Michael Cole. Presumably it would be a draw and Booker keeps the title but it’s not clear. A Sharmell distraction lets Booker take over as JBL goes on a tirade about Teddy Long being racist. Side kick puts Batista down for two. We hit a chinlock to fill in some time which is probably the last thing they should do right now. Batista comes back with some right hands and a belly to belly suplex for two.

Batista cranks things up and knocks Booker to the floor before sending him into the steps. Back in and a top rope shoulder gets two. The spinebuster gets the same but Booker grabs the Bookend for two. Batista comes back with the Batista Bomb but the champ grabs the rope. Sharmell gives Booker the title, Batista takes it from him and clocks Booker with it, new champion. That’s how the show ends: not with a Batista Bomb, but with Batista cheating.

Rating: D-. A horrible match to end a horrible show is always appropriate. Batista getting the title back was probably the right move as he was insanely over and hadn’t been champion since January. This match didn’t work at all though and it was the last time Booker would be near the World Title, which is probably a good thing if he’s as bad as he looked here.

Overall Rating: D-. When the second best match of your show is a group of guys in their late fifties or early sixties beating up male cheerleaders for ten minutes, your show is in trouble. There’s NOTHING worth seeing here at all and this show sucked. The other odd thing here is where the time went.

This show runs about two hours and forty minutes and the longest match (main event) doesn’t break fourteen minutes. There’s no big segment on it either so I have no idea where the time went. Other than the main event nothing is awful but there’s nothing worth watching. Either way, this is an awful show and probably the worst since the 90s.

Ratings Comparison

Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: B

Redo: D+

Mickie James vs. Lita

Original: B

Redo: D

Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO

Original: B

Redo: C-

Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker

Original: C+

Redo: C

Team Cena vs. Team Big Show

Original: D+

Redo: D

Batista vs. Booker T

Original: D-

Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D-

WHAT WAS I THINKING ON THOSE EARLIER MATCHES???

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/15/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2006-who-thought-batista-vs-booker-was-a-good-idea/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2006
Date: November 26, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,400
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, JBL, Michael Cole

It’s the 20th show in case you were wondering for some bizarre reason that I can’t comprehend. With the 2006 show, the only real difference is the induction of ECW into the company. It brings the third brand and at this point is still complete with the Originals and Heyman etc. Also there are some new faces such as Johnny Nitro (Morrison), Punk, MVP and Kennedy.

There are three Survivor Series matches here and the main event is Booker vs. Batista which had been done about a million times already but they figured what the heck we might as well do it again. Other than that, there’s not a lot here that jumps off the page at me.

Oh DX is here again as they’re feuding with Rated RKO, having just finished fighting Vince and Shane. Other than that, there’s just not a lot here. It looks kind of generic but sometimes cards like that are best. Here we go again as we’re very close to wrapping this series up.

The intro video is about as bland as you can get, but in this case it’s actually working. They talk very briefly about how this is the 20th Survivor Series and a new generation is here, followed by a quick build up for all seven matches. There’s not a lot here but it’s a nice change of pace from all of the stupid videos about Survival that we’ve heard for the last two or three years. After the four (ECW is left out) commentators talk about their show’s big matches, we’re ready to go.

Spirit Squad vs. Legends

The Spirit Squad is comprised of Kenny Dykstra, Johnny Jeter who was pretty awesome in OVW, a short guy named Mikey, and a guy named Nick, who would eventually be known as Dolph Ziggler. Spellcheck has never heard the name Dolph? Has it never seen Rocky 4? That’s just sad. Anyway, there’s also a 5th guy on the outside that never did anything. On the other side we have Arn Anderson on the floor with Dusty Rhodes, Sgt. Slaughter, Ron Simmons (really?) and Ric Flair in the ring.

Apparently Simmons was supposed to be Roddy Piper but he had been diagnosed with cancer so naturally he couldn’t wrestle. Ok in that case it’s a bit better. Naturally this is over the respect for the old timers thing which is about as basic of a storyline that will almost always work as you could ask for. Dusty comes out to his American Dream music so I’m happy. Simmons is rocking the catchphrase shirt and the APA music.

Anderson comes out to the Horsemen theme, so this is officially a cool show. Dang that music is awesome. I really love kayfabe as Flair and Anderson have tried to cripple Dusty at least half a dozen times over the years yet now they’re his partners. That could only work in wrestling. The Spirit Squad were a bunch of male cheerleaders. Yep, that’s about all that needs to be said. It amuses me greatly to see Ziggler in there looking like that.

We start out with Simmons against Mikey, because that’s a great way to open up a PPV. Ross says there’s an unlimited amount of combinations that could occur. Actually there are sixteen combinations that could happen while the match is still going on, but who am I to question the great mathematician known as Jim Ross? Ron beats down the whole heel team but gets tripped and goes after Kenny.

After he and Arn beat up Mikey, he’s counted out despite the referee never actually saying ten. Well I guess that’s as good of a way to get rid of him as any other, but I would have liked it to have lasted longer than two minutes. Mitch the manager gets thrown out too so there we go. Arn gets the same and I want to massacre that referee. This is kind of overkill here and even the fans are chanting bull.

When you can get a Philly crowd to cheer for you, you have officially won. On a replay we see that Anderson beat up Mitch. So wait, he can get thrown out for beating on someone not even in the match? What sense does that even begin to make? If your answer is none at all, YOU’RE RIGHT! Think about it: he’s getting in trouble for beating someone up that isn’t officially involved in the match. So could he be thrown out of the match for getting into a bar fight? See, it makes no sense.

Anyway, we’re up to Slaughter against Mikey now. Dusty gets a solid pop when he comes in, thankfully wearing a shirt. Flair gets less of a pop, but the chops make up for it. The heels are getting destroyed here which is just what shouldn’t have happened. I get that they’re legends, but isn’t the job of guys like these to put over young talent? I guess not as Sarge has the Cobra Clutch on Nicky. Man these guys are hard to tell apart other than Kenny.

I love how in today’s company, this would be so one sided the other way that it’s not even funny. With the referee distracted, Johnny comes in and kicks Slaughter in the back of the head and Nicky gets the easy pin to make it 4-2. In one of the stupidest looking things I’ve ever seen, with Nicky still down from the cover, Dusty casually walks in, measures him, and drops a very slow elbow on him to get the pin.

Seriously? That’s all it takes? A single elbow drop to beat someone? I get that Dusty was limited at best in the ring but he couldn’t pick him up and throw some punches and slam him or something? A freaking elbow drop gets the pin? Come on now. For the life of me I don’t get what the big deal about Kenny was. He was ok at best and that’s about all. After the really stupid (and insanely slow) Flip Flop and Fly, Dusty gets rolled up and Kenny pins him.

So now we have Flair vs. Kenny, Mikey and Johnny. Which of the jobbers is Flair going to take out first? It’s Mikey who gets taken out by a roll up with Flair’s feet on the ropes for a nice old school cheating pin. Flair truly was a master at taking something as simple as that and making it look cool and so completely evil when he was a heel. Sometimes less is more and Flair was the best there ever was in that area.

Ross points out that the Legends team had 21 world title reigns between them, but Flair has 16 of those. That’s just amusing. Flair hooks a quick inside cradle to make this Johnny vs. Ric Flair. Hmm, I’m not sure how this is going to go. I have to go with the guy in green. No way some old guy beats him is there? Oh never mind.

Even I can’t make this sound funny. The figure four gets the old guys the win about 45 seconds later. The Squad beats up Flair afterwards and surprisingly no help comes out for Flair.

Rating: C+. Eh this was what it was. They only had about ten minutes which is what it should have been. Other than Simmons, who wasn’t supposed to be in there anyway, all of the eliminations kind of made sense. Having Flair be the winner is ok I guess as he was at least an active wrestler at the time. His picking apart of the team at the end was great stuff as nothing he did was flashy or anything like that as he beat all three guys using very basic stuff.

That’s something that a lot of guys now could learn actually. The Figure Four was appropriate as he shouldn’t have gone for that with others around and he didn’t. When he was outnumbered he used fast stuff but once things were even he used his best. That’s terrific thinking there and it worked quite well. This wasn’t really about anything but nostalgia, but sometimes there’s nothing wrong with that, and this is a great example of one of those times.

Cole says that Philly is one of three cities to host all of the Big Four, with the others being New York City and Boston. That’s actually pretty cool.

Recap of Benoit vs. Chavo, which goes like this. Chavo and Vickie had allegedly been doing jack with Eddie’s estate or something like that which was never elaborated on. Benoit comes back from a hiatus and wins the US Title. Chavo also says that Rey is trying to steal the Guerrero name because that would be something evil.

We’ll of course ignore that Chavo and Vickie have been doing that for their whole careers but whatever. Anyway, Chavo injured Rey’s knee and put him out, so Benoit came to his rescue. That brings us here.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chave Guerrero

Vickie actually has some pretty awesome cleavage. Since this is Benoit, it’s naturally an intense match. There’s not a lot to say here. It’s really just a lot of strikes from both guys mixed with the occasional attempt at the Crossface. I know that’s not a lot to go on but I really have nothing to say here. It’s insane to think that Benoit would be gone in less than a year. This is where Chavo is at his best: in there with another guy of about his size and just letting it go.

Both guys can wrestle as well as anyone else and Chavo, or Shavo as JBL refers to him as because he can’t pronounce his name for some reason, really is better than he’s given credit for. Vickie interferes about a dozen times here and it’s rather annoying. JBL compares it to cheating on your wife with some hot chick on the road. Dang what must his wife have thought of that line? Benoit misses the headbutt because of Vickie leading to Guerrero hitting the Frog Splash for two.

A massive Eddie chant breaks out because of that. Benoit goes for the Sharpshooter and gets shoved off, slamming into Vickie THANK GOODNESS. Chavo goes to check on her and the Crossface ends this. It was short but quite intense which was where Benoit shined.

Rating: B. Like I said, this was short but intense. Benoit could fight with the best of them but he could also wrestle better than the best of them which is what made him so successful. Chavo certainly can go too and it’s a shame that he’s a comedy jobber to this day. I really do feel bad for him, but he’s getting on TV so you can’t blame him for that. Solid match that was just long enough to not feel short.

The Elimination Chamber is coming back at December 2 Dismember. Oh dear this was awful in every sense of the word. Also, it’s A WEEK LATER. There’s a rant coming one day on that show as it’s about as much of a debacle as humanly possible, but I’ll save that for later.

Edge and Lita are with Todd Grisham. Tonight is Lita’s last match despite the fact that she’s the Women’s Champion. Edge offers some weak Philly jokes before doing the smarter thing and kissing Lita. He rants a bit more while Cryme Tyme is behind them sneaking into her locker room and stealing her stuff.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Lita

Like I said, this is Lita’s last night with the company. Mickie is at this point the queen of the short skirts which gave us some AWESOME visuals for a long time. For the life of me I don’t get how people don’t think she’s hot. Mickie is flat out gorgeous on so many levels. Granted Lita is somehow hotter which defies logic. Lita’s music truly does rock. This likely is going to go quick as it’s about as obvious as possible that Mickie walks out with the belt here.

Allegedly Lita is leaving due to the fans hating her, which is actually pretty creative. The fans boo people all the time yet this time the fans are actually getting rid of someone they can’t stand. Trish had left two months prior to this, so this is more or less the ending of the Women’s Division’s best years. More or less they’re just going through the motions here and it’s not that interesting.

To be fair, at least Lita isn’t being a witch like Goldberg and Lesnar were when they left and having a horrible match more or less on purpose. She’s not exactly lighting the world on fire or anything, but she’s certainly out there trying and that’s all I can ask of her. Mickie surprisingly kicks out of both the Litarana and the moonsault to a decent pop. My goodness Mickie has a nice figure.

After some back and forth reversals, Mickie hits the jumping DDT to get the pin and the division is officially in big trouble. That’s not a knock on Mickie by any means, but other than her around this time there was absolutely no one that could carry a decent match. She and Melina traded the belt a bit before Candice arrived and took the division over despite a rather severe lack of talent at the time.

Lita wants a mic as the fans are singing to her a familiar song. Actually she’s demanding that Lillian calls her the best Women’s Champion ever, which of course gets her booed again. It’s a shame she left because she was awesome as a heel. Anyway, after she whines a lot, Cryme Tyme, who was the hottest team on the planet around this time, comes out with the box, and it’s time for a HO SALE! Everything must go so have your money ready.

This really is hilarious as JTG has charisma to burn. He’s actually a lot better on the mic than he’s given credit for. They sell mainly underwear and bras with JBL offering $100 for some panties. They take the money and toss them into the crowd of course. Lita is freaking out over this as they pull out her vibrator. I love how the cops aren’t here as it’s clearly Lita’s stuff and she’s upset about this. The last item: it’s big, it’s wide, it’s cheap and you can fit your head in it.

It’s Lita’s box. As Cryme Tyme is leaving, you can hear some very profane in their song. That’s most interesting. You kind of have to feel bad for Lita that on her last night this is her sendoff, but dang that was great. It’s a shame that they never win jack in the ring, but geez they need to go back to doing stuff like this as it was hilarious.

Rating: B. Well, they made Mickie look strong and Lita looked fine on her way out so those two missions were certainly accomplished. Considering there was absolutely zero suspense about the ending, I’d say this was fine. There’s little drama but the match itself was fine.

Mickie was the future of the division so having her beat Lita clean after kicking out of her signature moves was the exact right thing to do. This was fine for what it was and the girls both looked hot. Couple that with a great comedy segment and this was sweet.

We go to an interview with Cole and Batista from earlier in the day. Cole asks a bunch of questions and Batista says nothing at all to anything. He just sits and stares straight ahead. After a clip of Booker attacking him on Smackdown, Batista still says nothing. Cole asks if he has anything at all to say and Batista takes off his glasses, looks at Cole and simply says “Tonight, I’m leaving as World Heavyweight Champion”. End of interview.

I LOVE that. How many times have you seen people do the exact same promo that absolutely nothing gets said in at all and it’s just the same stuff that we hear every month? This was directly to the point and made Batista look crazy, which is exactly the point. I loved this and it did its job to perfection.

Team DX vs. Team Rated RKO

DX, Hardys, Punk
Randy Orton, Edge, Mike Knox, Johnny Nitro, Gregory Helms

The feuds are pretty self explanatory here with Punk against Knox, Nitro against Jeff and Matt against Helms. We don’t get any stupid things like stories or anything like that. Why waste time there. Let’s just get theme music playing and get to it! Jeff is Intercontinental Champion here. For some reason Lillian calls Matt and Jeff Team Xtreme while Ross calls them their traditional names.

Punk gets a solid pop. He’s a rookie here and is still undefeated. Naturally since he’s young, over and good with a different gimmick, Vince decided that Hardcore Holly should outlast him in the Elimination Chamber. Heyman had wanted to put Punk over Big Show but Vince decided that Holly had more potential. For those of you keeping score, that’s Heyman – 1, Vince – 0. DX gets a big pop despite their entrance taking forever.

Who would have thought that at this time three years later Matt would be by far and away the least successful? After a longer version of the standard intro in which all of the faces try to get different sections of the crowd to cheer the loudest, we’re on to the heels. First of all though, we get a HUGE CM Punk chant. He gets to ask are you ready? That’s saying a lot. That really is a freaking stacked face team in there with what, 25 world titles between four guys?

Melina and Nitro come out first with her looking ridiculously hot. For some reason that no one gets, Kevin Federline was a character around this time and an A-list guy along with Nitro and Melina. Vince’s desperation to be in every facet of entertainment will never cease to amaze me. Helms, the Cruiserweight Champion and coming out to the most generic rock music of all time is next. Knox, sans awesome beard is somehow dating Kelly at this point. Her skirt might be 4 inches wide. That’s awesome.

Edge and Orton are the tag champions here and their mix of music is completely awesome. After about ten minutes of intros and another Punk chant we start off with Knox and HHH. HHH, being a selfish bastard as always, hits on Kelly. At the time Kelly was an exhibitionist character so she gets up to flash HHH but Knox cuts him off. He turns into Sweet Chin Music and it’s 5-4 after about 45 seconds. The fans are WAY into Punk here.

Naturally Hardcore Holly would get 10x the pops though. Shawn scares the heck out of Melina in a funny spot. Morrison is in now and the faces take their time beating the living tar out of him. Edge beats on Matt for a bit which is dripping with history. I’m glad the captains aren’t staying on the apron until the end. Matt is bleeding from the mouth. I guess that’s better than being From The South. Punk comes in and gets cheered louder than anyone in the match.

After a few seconds, Nitro is tapping fast. He needs to bring that back, even as a secondary move. I’m talking about the Anaconda Vice in case there was any confusion. Helms and Edge beat down Punk, but he still gets massive chants. They’ll be silent when Holly shows up though. You know he’s a real star. He won a tag title. Helms busts out a one leg version of what will become known as the Codebreaker. The RKO puts Punk more or less out cold but Shawn breaks up the pin.

Punk finally gets the tag to HHH who comes in for the first time. Naturally he cleans house for awhile but it’s time for the big brawl, leading to the Hardys taking everyone out. The Twist of Fate and Swanton takes out Helms to make it 5 vs. Rated RKO. The heels grab their belts and try to leave but the Hardys cut them off. They all beat on Edge for awhile and then he gets kicked in the face for the pin. Ross calls him a Canadian Piñata which is kind of funny.

Randy tries to run through the crowd but every face not named DX catches him and the DX Double Team Finishing Combination, which is a long way to say Sweet Chin Music and a Pedigree take him out for the clean sweep. Massive posing and celebrating follows.

Rating: B. This was very fun. It was fast paced and it got the point over perfectly. Also it doesn’t bury Edge and Orton because not even two A-list guys like them could overcome an obstacle like this. This was a great example of perfect booking and a great Survivor Series match. Punk’s pops are the most surprising part here though as they were by far and away the biggest thing of the match.

Vince is a freaking idiot to not let Punk get pushed because he wasn’t a big enough name yet or whatever. That’s a great example of his ego taking control of his senses. Punk would get pushed, but they freaking pushed Holly over him, and for what? The idea of paying dues? Come on now Vince, listen to the people and grow up for a change.

Time to recap the only real push that Kennedy ever got. This was around the time where he kept beating world champions and he’s challenged Taker at his show. Oddly that’s not Mania but whatever. They did manage to make this a First Blood match which helps a lot as it allows Kennedy to potentially beat Taker but Taker doesn’t have to actually get pinned. As for the story here, Kennedy says that he’s young so he has to take out the old man that is Taker.

How many people have used this same story? That’s just a painful lack of creativity. Also I would be willing to bet that at some point in the promos leading up to this, Kennedy has said he’s not afraid of the dark because no one ever has been. In the highlight package, Kennedy says that at Survivor KENNEDY! Sorry I had to get that joke in at least once.

He says that at Survivor Series the decade and a half of destruction will end. Well that’s all well and good for a threat but the decade and a half ended the year before. We’re closing in on two decades now. Is Kennedy planning on bringing a time traveling Delorean to the match or something? That would be cooler than he is, so maybe it should happen.

Undertaker vs. Mr. Kennedy

Before the match, Kennedy is talking to Krystal about how this is the biggest match of his career when MVP comes up. I almost forgot: they were teaming a bit at the time and actually had a very short feud with the Brothers of Destruction. I’ll give you two guesses as to which team got their heads handed to them. Kennedy has Vaseline on his forehead which keeps fists from making full contact and thereby opening up his head. That’s actually pretty smart.

Kennedy is wearing the Norcal shirt so I’m making a good bit here. Why does the blood have to come from the head? I’d love to see someone come out with a needle and poke their opponent’s finger to get the win. I’d half die of laughter. Kennedy desperately needs his new music at this point as the one he’s using here is painfully generic. He takes off two of the turnbuckle pads as JBL calls him the future of Smackdown. Again, that’s something that when you hear it now it’s just incredibly funny.

Holy crap Cole made a Back to the Future reference! I swear that wasn’t foreshadowing or anything like that when I made the Delorean joke earlier. Wow that actually made my review. I’m stunned. As Taker comes out Kennedy pulls off another buckle covering. Taker really does look awesome here. After over ten minutes since we started talking about this match, the bell finally rings. Ok, that’s just WAY too long.

I have no interest in watching it after that long, but at least this looks cool so let’s get to it. They keep pointing out that this is anything goes. We get it guys, chill a bit. This is really just a brawl/Taker beating up Kennedy to start us off, which I guess makes the most sense. I’m liking this actually. It’s a lot better than I expected, and I think that’s because they’re going on a rather slow style which allows them to set up to a big finish.

That’s fine, although I’m not sure why Taker is working on Kennedy’s ribs. I guess it’s because he wants to slow him down? Does that makes sense? I guess in some way it does, but it just doesn’t feel right. I’ve rarely seen anyone bleed from the stomach, at least in a wrestling match. Taker is completely dominant here. Cole asks about the logic of attacking the ribs as well, which has JBL saying Taker wants Kennedy to bleed from the mouth.

That’s…..kind of stupid but it works I suppose. A low blow does little to slow down Taker, which I kind of like I think. It keeps the whole painless man thing working. Another low blow actually works though so the first was completely pointless. Kennedy goes to the floor and is bleeding from the mouth but MVP comes out with a towel to clean it up. I’m surprised it can clot that fast but whatever.

With Taker back in control, MVP comes in with a chair for no apparent reason and cracks Taker with it to bust him open. That was just odd. Post match, Kennedy beats on him a bit more and gets in his face with the mic for his catchphrase. Taker of course grabs him by the throat and it’s beatdown time.

Taker KILLS him with the chair which gets a holy crap chant from a Philly crowd. That says a lot. A tombstone ends this beating as Taker poses to close the segment with JBL talking about how awesome and scary Taker is.

Rating: C+. This started off solid but it felt like the ending came from absolutely nowhere. MVP coming down wasn’t needed as he was swinging for Kennedy and it was just a big mess. I get why they had Kennedy win here as it makes the most sense, but dang this was just a mess near the end.

For the life of me I don’t get why they booked it like that. This is a great example of a match that just needed more time to flesh itself out. Another five minutes or so would have made this much better.

Booker isn’t worried about Batista tonight.

Again with no transition, we’re at our penultimate match.

Team Cena vs. Team Big Show

Cena, RVD, Kane, Lashley, Sabu
Big Show, MVP, Test, Finlay, Umaga

Dang those are some pretty motley crews of tag teams. Lashley is just becoming a bit deal, Kane is Kane, RVD is pretty worthless and Sabu just sucks. Test is the worst excuse for a big man ever and Finlay never really did anything other than have a midget for a son. This just doesn’t look good at all on paper. Let’s get this over with. Cena is between feuds with Show and Umaga here. We start with Umaga and Cena which would become the title feud very soon after this.

The Champ puts Umaga on the floor with a clothesline and the savage reacts savagely. He rips up the table of course and gets out a monitor which he blasts RVD, Sabu and Cena with for the fast DQ. Well that was abrupt. I get that they want to keep him hot but that’s a bit, shall we say extreme? I get what they’re trying to do here but it is a bit much. Granted it puts the faces at an early disadvantage so that’s mission accomplished if nothing else.

After that insanity we’re back with Finlay vs. RVD. Test comes in to beat on RVD a bit as Test continues to just be a failure on many levels. Vince to his credit though kept trying to push him despite him completely sucking at it. After about a minute in there Finlay comes back in just in case you missed him. Since he’s had his face kicked in for a good long while now Van Dam is bleeding from the mouth.

This is just not interesting at all for some reason despite there being a lot of names in there that are certainly A-list guys. I guess it’s that there’s no way Cena’s team is losing here but whatever. Van Dam hits one heck of a kick on Finlay which I think wasn’t supposed to be that solid. He caught him great though and it looked awesome. After a rather weak brawl, Kane interferes and hits a chokeslam on MVP to set up the Five Star and make it 5-3.

As RVD gets up though, Test hits the SICKEST big boot I’ve ever seen to take him out. Even Kane on the apron was knocked back by just looking at it. I mean Kane is just watching this and he looks like he got hit by a right hand and he’s only wincing because of how solid a kick that was. That was completely sick and no one would kick out of that. Based on that kick alone, I’d buy Test as a main event guy.

Go find a video of this match to see how sick that was. I’m impressed. Sabu immediately runs in and rolls Test up but since that’s a wrestling move it doesn’t work. On the floor Lashley hits a spear on Test to allow Sabu to hit a Tornado DDT to get the win on him, yet again crushing any semblance of a push that Test could have gotten. Show walks in and a simple chokeslam ends purple pants.

I know this is just listing stuff but there’s maybe 30 seconds between falls, which is counting people coming in, the moves and the counts. That leaves little time for anything else. Kane comes in. Oh in case you lost track, it’s Kane, Cena and Lashley against Finlay and Show. To follow up on that kick, RVD is just now leaving. That’s insane. Kane is 200lbs lighter than Show. That’s even scarier.

During a double choke from the big men, the man known as Little Bastard who will eventually be named Hornswoggle comes in and distracts the referee long enough for Kane to get smacked with the club and then chokeslammed to make this 2-2. This feels like they ran out of time in the middle of the match. Now we get Show against Cena with John being booed badly. After too long of a beating on Cena Lashley gets the hot tag and cleans house.

Show takes both guys down though to set up a pretty bad elimination for Finlay. The Irishman rolls Horny into the ring and is going to use him as a battering ram but Lashley hits a running punch to the ribs which is called a spear. Cena tries to FU Horny but Show stops him. Cena is just flat out hated in this town. Who would have seen that coming?

Once it’s 2-1, I don’t think Show got in any offense at all. Well, that’s a great way to make your champion look just before the first ECW PPV isn’t it guys? After the third Lashley spear of the match (learn some new moves for goodness’s sake) the 500lb FU ends this. Massive celebrations follow.

Rating: D+. What was the point of this? Cena was in the middle of his feuds here and the rest was just kind of a big preview of the awful Chamber match next week. Most of these guys were seemingly thrown together and told to go have a twelve minute Survivor Series match.

WAY too much of this was rapid fire eliminations which rarely if ever work. I really wasn’t too big on this but some cool spots make it ok. Also it’s short, which is a big problem but in another way it’s also the best thing about it. Try having that make sense.

Hey! There’s another PPV in a week and even though Vince is going to announce only two matches and go completely against what the fans are cheering for because he knows better. I mean really think about it. The fans are chanting for Punk despite HHH and HBK and one of the most popular tag teams of all time being in there, but he naturally didn’t get to last as long as that master of the ring, Hardcore Holly. Vince, grow up. You really need to.

We get what I guess you would call a recap of Booker vs. Batista. The idea is simple: Batista has tried twice or so already and hasn’t gotten the belt, so this is his last chance which gives the ending away already. This led to the ridiculously annoying Sharmell shouting ALL HAIL KING BOOKER!, about once every three seconds. It was a decent idea for a drinking game. Batista had been forced to relinquish the title nearly a year ago due to injury and hasn’t gotten it back yet. Yep, that’s about it.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Batista

Teddy Long comes out and says exactly the same thing I just did, but adds that if Booker is counted out or disqualified Batista gets the belt, again making sure that the ending of the Batista Bomb is set in stone. I’ve always shaken my head over the little spin move that Batista would do when he was jumping up and down. Of course it’s up and down as I don’t think you can jump any other way.

Actually according to AJ Styles’ old music you can jump to the left which you can also do in the Time Warp so there we are. That was a rather pointless rant but whatever. This is a long entrance and I’m not that interested in the match itself. King Booker was either brilliant or a complete failure and I’m still not sure which. If nothing else it gave him an actual gimmick. Before this he was just Booker T.

Cole says the following great line: “There’s the Animal, pacing like a caged animal.” Does that just sound stupid to anyone else? Good grief Booker is slower than Taker when it comes to entrances. Thankfully Batista jumps him so we get to this faster. Wow…this is very boring. There’s just nothing at all out of the ordinary here as it’s just Batista beats on Booker but as he goes for the Bomb Booker hits the floor. Wow how exciting.

This was around the time where Smackdown was almost universally looked down on for being awful and I can certainly see how that’s the conception. It’s been all Batista so far meaning that the Booker comeback is coming very soon. Yep there it is. This is just predictable. JBL tries to make us believe that this is the big match of the show.

There’s a big difference between going on last and being the main event, although there really wasn’t a main event on this card anyway so maybe that’s a fair statement to make. There’s a very limited reaction from the crowd here as for one thing this is in Philadelphia or as it’s more commonly known Smark city #1 or #2 based on your thoughts on New York City.

Batista hits a Jackhammer to even less of a reaction. Sharmell interferes and thereby gives Booker the advantage. After some more generic back and forth stuff we discuss the idea that Teddy Long is trying to get the belt off Booker because he’s racist. Sadly, that’s by far the most entertaining aspect of this match. They keep changing the story about the rules of the title.

At one point it’s he doesn’t get a shot at Booker again, then it’s at the title ever. Make up your minds on the pointless stipulations guys. I’m about to fall asleep from this match as it’s really that bad. Actually it’s not bad, but just boring on so many levels. Batista is treating him like a jobber in ever sense of the word. To up the drama/excitement, which is to say actually have some, Batista hits a shoulder block from the top.

JBL says it’s anyone’s ball game, which explains why Booker has been getting his face kicked in for about five minutes. Booker hits a random Book End so he can use the Spinerooni. Batista pops up and hits the Batista Bomb but Booker grabs the bottom rope. Sharmell interferes (for some reason that word was hard to spell) and Booker misses a belt shot, and Batista nails him with the belt for the title. Wait what? That’s how they’re ending this?

He has Booker more or less dead and he doesn’t even use the freaking Batista Bomb? To even further the stupidity of this, he kicked Booker in the ribs to make him drop the title, so he was in perfect position for the Bomb. That was a stupid ending because it makes Batista look both heelish and weak. That was awful.

Rating: D-. This was AWFUL. It was boring, the ending was never in doubt, and yet they somehow managed to botch that too. Batista breathed life back into the title though as he and Taker would soon start their mega feud over the belt, but seriously, this was the best they could do? It was like a main event for the sake of saying they had a main event which is just stupid. I want my fifteen minutes back! Awful way to end the show, plain and simple.

Overall Rating: C-. Again that’s being generous. The first half of this show is great but after that the whole thing just falls apart at the seams. The second half of this show just doesn’t work at all for me. The two main Survivor Series matches were just not good, plain and simple.

The main event was garbage of the highest degree and the whole show just falls flat for me. There’s some ok stuff here but it really just isn’t working at all for me. The first few matches, mainly the Benoit/Chavo match were actually pretty good. The show just doesn’t feel big at all and it just doesn’t work. I’d avoid it if I were you.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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