As much as people are going to remember the best matches, these are the ones that are going to get people talking more than anything else. The wretched, terrible matches are the kind that stick in your head because you wonder how bad things can possibly get. Sometimes it’s the whole match and sometimes it’s one thing, but these are the matches that you’ll remember for all the wrong reasons.

Honorable Mention

Sting vs. Jeff Hardy – Victory Road 2011 – I’m not putting this as an official one as I don’t consider it a “real” match. Instead, we have another mess where TNA managed to make it even worse, because that’s what they did back then. There’s a reason this keeps getting brought up and it’s not getting topped for a long time.

Kaitlyn vs. Maxine – NXT – October 19, 2010 – Just watch it and try not to cringe.

Royal Rumble 2015

It takes something special to have the fans booing the Rock out of the building. This is one of those horrible ideas that could not have been much worse and it’s a big part of why Roman Reigns never reached the point they were wanting him to achieve. They missed every single point of this whole thing and it could not have gone much worse.

The entire idea of this match was to make Roman Reigns look like a star. They managed to turn it into the biggest disaster imaginable with one mistake after the other. Reigns looked like he had no business being in the ring and was little more than a big WWE logo. His big opponents were Big Show and Kane, plus a surprise Rusev at the end. That’s their big idea to get him to face Lesnar? No wonder he was a failure for so long.

Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole – Wrestlemania XXVII

I named this worst feud of the decade and I’d say that gives it a fast pass on to this list. The match itself wasn’t any good in the first place, including Cole being way too dominant and having Steve Austin and Jack Swagger there to try and make it interesting. Lawler can have a watchable match with a bag of wet mice but for some reason this is the best thing that they had for him to do.

And then he lost, because WWE felt the need to keep the story going on and on. Why should Wrestlemania be the blowoff for some big feud? This was a complete misfire and the crowd just dying as a result shows you how bad it really was. The show never recovered from this because WWE set it up for one possible ending and then we got the complete opposite, presumably just for the sake of messing with us. How lucky we are.

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton – Wrestlemania XXXIII

I was in the stadium for this one and I’m still not sure what I watched. After a pretty decent build with Orton infiltrating the Wyatt Family to take them down from within and possibly destroying Sister Abigail, we wound up with some bizarre mind game where Wyatt put gross images on the mat to get in Orton’s head. Orton’s response? RKO for the pin and the title….which he lost to Jinder Mahal.

What were they thinking with this mess? It was a bunch of bad wrestling in between their weird ideas. If you want to do Wyatt vs. Orton at Wrestlemania then just do the match. Instead we got something that I’m sure WWE found to be very clever and it wound up being a disaster of other level proportions. How Wyatt survived this is beyond me, but he managed to make it work despite this disaster.

Randy Orton vs. Jinder Mahal – Battleground 2017

This is the Punjabi Prison match and MY GOODNESS it still manages to get on my nerves. Mahal got to go out there for nearly half an hour before Great Khali came in to save him. The only highlight of this was seeing Orton torture the Singh Brothers, who deserved a big raise after everything they went through with the whole Mahal story.

The problem with this match is the length (in addition to Mahal just being there, because there is little reason for him to be anywhere near the top of the card), as the match just went on and on for WAY too long. It was Orton getting close to winning and then the Singhs interfering and then Orton getting close to winning and then the Singhs interfering over and over and it just never stopped. I hated this match and it was the last straw after Mahal would not go away no matter how much people rejected him.

Those made me mad. This one was mad and sad.

Seth Rollins vs. The Fiend – Hell In A Cell

Over the years, there are very few matches that I’ve seen that actually made me mad. It takes something special to misfire on every point while damaging your hot new character and wrecking your big gimmick match. WWE managed to do this while also getting fans to chant for the competition at the end of the show. Rollins was in a bad place already and this shoved him to the point of no return.

I still can’t fathom how bad this really was. Fiend was the unstoppable monster and while Rollins didn’t completely destroy him, it was one of those nights where you had to wonder how bad things were when they were setting it up. This was the best thing they could do with their monster? In the Cell? I’ve used a lot of words to talk about this one in the last few months and I could continue doing so for a long time to come. The match was another level of awful and I don’t see it being topped anytime soon.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

You know a great one of these when you see it as they have all of the awesome parts and very few in the way of weakness. Now I know that this is going to include a lot of Takeovers and….well how could it not? Those shows are critically acclaimed and it’s almost impossible to not have have them very high on the list. I’ll try to limit it, but that’s not exactly easy.

Honorable Mention

Summerslam 2013 – This is one of those shows where people remember the one two punch of a double main event but there is so much other great stuff on there. I watched it again last year and sweet goodness it might be the best Summerslam of all time.

Wrestle Kingdom XIII – You have to have some Wrestle Kingdom on here as the shows are often incredible and this one might have been the best one I’ve ever seen. Great matches, great action and how GREAT was it to have this be less than four hours? That’s such an important key as they get out before it loses its welcome.

Takeover: Brooklyn I – This might have my favorite NXT Match ever and that is some pretty high praise. NXT was on the top of the world and got to show what they could do. The fact that it would somehow get even better is almost scary, but that’s just what they do down there.

Takeover: Brooklyn IV – I had almost forgotten about this one and that’s saying a lot. It’s the one with the Last Man Standing match between Johnny Gargano and Tommaso Ciampa, with Gargano taking the injured Aleister Black’s place. On top of that there’s Moustache Mountain vs. Undisputed Era and Ricochet vs. Adam Cole. Isn’t NXT fun?

Wrestlemania XXX

Somehow this was almost added in for the sake of filling in some space on the main list. Wrestlemania XXX is always going to be special to me as it’s the first Wrestlemania I ever attended live. I remember walking into the stadium and seeing some lights flickering through the black curtains. All I could think was “Wrestlemania is behind there.” Then there was the show itself and….my goodness.

Between Hogan, Austin and Rock in the same ring, Bryan vs. HHH, the Streak being broken and Bryan’s incredible celebration, what more could you want? WWE knows how to do these big anniversary shows and that was on full display here, with one great moment after another, all capped off by the feel good moment to end it. This is one of those shows that always makes me smile and that is never going to change.

Takeover: Dallas

This show feels like a lifetime ago and yet it still holds up today. The problem here is how many shows have surpassed it, which is downright scary. For a long time this was the benchmark for what Takeover could be and my goodness it was something special. You had something that showed just how good it could be and it had fans, including myself, who was in the crowd that night, desperate for more.

That night saw everything that you needed, with the incredible Revival vs. American Alpha opener, the perfectly fine Baron Corbin vs. Austin Aries, Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Sami Zayn’s nice to meet you/we’ll miss you special, Asuka crushing Bayley and FINN BALOR HAS A CHAINSAW. This is something that blew the roof off the place and it’s still one of the best Takeovers ever, which is some pretty high praise.

Money In The Bank 2011

Sometimes you see a show that doesn’t bother with any pretense and just hits you in the face with one great match after another. That’s what you had here with the two Money In The Bank matches, the underrated Randy Orton vs. Christian feud and the instant masterpiece between John Cena and CM Punk (the reason Orton vs. Christian didn’t get the recognition that it deserved).

It’s a show where everyone is going to remember the incredible main event but there is a lot more to the show than that. With so many great things going on at the same show, it’s hard not to give this show some serious praise. The main event is what matters more than anything else though, and that’s one of the best match ever, which is the kind of thing that moves this all the way to the top of the list.

Takeover: New York

My goodness what a show. This is the kind of event that gives Takeover the reputation that it deserves. The first three matches on here are all instant classics and the main event is the big emotional moment that the fans had been waiting for. It’s one of the best and most entertaining shows that I’ve ever seen and that is hardly shocking given what NXT does on the big stage.

The big deal here is Johnny Gargano winning the NXT Title by defeating Adam Cole. Gargano had been chasing the title from Tommaso Ciampa for months and then he FINALLY got the win that he had been looking for. If this had been Gargano defeating Ciampa for the title to end their amazing feud, it might be the greatest show of all time. As it is, it’s just one of the best ever and that’s saying something given its competition.

Yeah I’m splitting hairs here, and me being in the building might have had something to do with it.

Takeover: New Orleans

What brings this over is the emotion. The big main event here was the first Gargano vs. Ciampa showdown, which was as awesome of a fight/brawl that I’ve ever seen. NXT made the right call by making this the main event. There was nothing else topping it and NXT turned in one of the incredible shows that you knew they were capable of and then some.

On top of that, you have what might have been the best multi-man ladder match since TLC II, which covers quite a bit of ground. These six people fought the heck out of each other for half an hour and everyone looked like a star. Then you have everything else on the show, including the awesome NXT Title match with Aleister Black kicking Andrade’s head off to win the title. This is a special show and I don’t know of anything better in the last decade.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2020
Date: January 26, 2020
Location: Minute Maid Park, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Vic Joseph, Jerry Lawler, Tom Phillips

It’s time to get started on the Road to Wrestlemania and while you could say the Rumbles are predictable, you could also say that they’re wide open. This is a very strange situation and I’m rather pleased with that. I’m not sure who is going to win either but they’re going to mean a lot. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Shorty G. vs. Sheamus

Tale as old as time: monster vs. guy with a stupid name. Sheamus shrugs off a wristlock to start and hits a crossface shot to the face. Gable is back up with a running crossbody over the top so Sheamus hits him a few more time. Gable’s ear is bleeding and Sheamus grabs an armbar as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus working on the arm and then hitting the ten forearms to the chest. More forearms to the chest on the floor make it worse but Gable is back with a dropkick to the knee to stagger him. Some Liger kicks in the corner put Sheamus down and Gable stomps away at the leg. The moonsault connects for two and it’s Rolling Chaos Theory for the same. Gable grabs the ankle lock but Sheamus rolls out, only to have it go on again. That’s broken up again and Gables gets two off a crucifix. Back up the Brogue Kick gives Sheamus the pin at 12:31.

Rating: C. Just a match here and they were smart to put this on the Kickoff Show instead of doing it on the regular card. This is the kind of match that wasn’t exactly hard to predict as it was all about Sheamus being the monster and running over Gable, which isn’t quite a story that gets people excited but at least WWE can make more short jokes.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Andrade vs. Humberto Carrillo

Andrade is defending and they go with the dodging to start. Carrillo sends him outside for the slingshot dropkick through the ropes but the dive off the top only hits barricade. Back from a break with Andrade hitting a running kick to the side of the head and countering the high angle armdrag. Carrillo elbows him in the head though and now the springboard crossbody can drop the champ.

The rolling moonsault hits raised knees though and Andrade tries a baseball slide, only to wind up on the floor for an Asai moonsault. Back in and Andrade tries Three Amigos but Carrillo reverses the third into one of his own. The top rope moonsault misses as well though and Andrade rolls him up into the corner. Andrade’s running knees in the corner get two and they stagger to their feet to slug it out. They go to the corner with Andrade getting in a shot to the face, only to have Carrillo snap off a super hurricanrana for two. Carrillo tries another hurricanrana but Andrade reverses into a sunset flip to retain at 14:31.

Rating: C. This never got into that next gear, though they got the winner right. Carrillo is someone who the fans haven’t taken to yet and really, I’m not sure what it’s going to take to make them care. There isn’t much to him as far as charisma goes and that’s not enough when you have people who can fly just as well if not better. Fine for a Kickoff Show match, but that’s all it needed to be.

The opening video is narrated by Steve Austin, who talks about how important the Royal Rumble is because it can send you to Wrestlemania. Always cool to see Austin used for something important.

Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin

Falls Count Anywhere. Reigns goes after Corbin’s throne carriers and the fight is on before they get in the ring. Corbin is sent into the post and Reigns hammers away inside. The Samoan drop is blocked though and Corbin gets in a right hand for a breather. Corbin heads outside but gets pulled back over the barricade so the fight can continue. Back in and Corbin hits Deep Six for two but Reigns is right back up.

They fight outside again and over the barricade, this time into the crowd for the walking around the stadium sequence. It’s back to ringside with Reigns being dropped onto the announcers’ table for two, followed by a chokeslam through another announcers’ table for the same. With Corbin being rather frustrated, it’s time to go back through the crowd for more punching.

Reigns hits a Samoan drop through an international announcers’ table and then does the same thing again for two. They go over to the tech area and here are Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode to jump Reigns (you knew that was coming). Ziggler busts out a chain but here are the Usos to even things up. We stay on this brawl for a good while with Roode and Ziggler getting the better of things….until Jimmy dives off a balcony to take them down. Corbin remembers he’s in the match and drops Jimmy onto a barricade.

Rating: D+. Completely bleh match with little drama and the pure fact that it was Reigns vs. Corbin for 20+ minutes. WWE seems to think that this is some epic feud and it’s just not, mainly because Reigns is a top star and Corbin isn’t a main event level heel. Hopefully this is it because there’s no need to continue it, which is why you can probably pencil them in for two more matches at least.

Kevin Owens talks to Samoa Joe about his success in Houston and thinks he can win tonight. Samoa Joe likes the idea of getting rid of Seth Rollins but he’ll go through Owens if he has to.

Cole offers condolences to the families of Kobe Bryan and everyone else involved in the helicopter crash.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals with Alexa Bliss in at #1 and Bianca Belair is in at #2. Belair wastes no time in hitting a running shoulder in the corner and takes Bliss to the middle rope for some forearms. A running headscissors is countered into a backbreaker to put Bliss down again and Mighty Molly of all people is in at #3 (and to the Hurricane’s music of course). She clotheslines Bliss and Belair down and a high crossbody does the same. Molly can’t get Belair out and it’s Nikki Cross in at #4.

Bliss and Cross get to clean some house but stop to hug, only to have Molly and Belair run them over. Belair gives Cross the KOD onto Bliss, who is right back up with a sunset bomb. A neckbreaker drops Molly and everyone is down until Lana is in at #5. Hold on though as she takes her sweet time getting the ring because she needs to talk about how great she is and how this is for her hot husband.

Lana finally gets to the ring and can’t eliminate Molly as Mercedes Martinez is in at #6. Martinez gets to clean house, including a butterfly suplex to Lana (in the Captain Marvel gear). It’s not enough to get rid of her though and it’s Liv Morgan in at #7 to eliminate Lana. For some reason Liv goes up so Lana shoves her off for an elimination, meaning the fight is on.

Dana Brooke is in at #13 and hits the Swanton on Mia. Belair tosses Candice and Bliss slaps Sane off the top for an elimination in a bit of an upset. Tamina is in at #14 to superkick Brooke and get in the brawl with Belair. A charge lets Belair backdrop Tamina out for Belair’s sixth elimination so far. Dakota Kai is in at #15 to get us to the halfway point and there’s the running kick to Brooke in the corner.

Bliss gets rid of Yim and it’s Chelsea Green in at #16 (to Summer Rae’s old NXT theme). Green dumps Kai but gets tossed by Bliss, followed by by Belair knocking out Brooke. Bliss knocks Belair down but Twisted Bliss hits knees. They both go over the top to the apron and Belair knocks her out to stand alone until….Charlotte is in at #17. Charlotte starts with the chops but Belair knocks her into the corner.

Naomi is in at #18 for a return and a big reaction. Charlotte and Naomi trade missed dropkicks and nip up for a staredown. They both go after Belair and it’s Beth Phoenix in at #19, sending Charlotte into a panic. Naomi gets sent to the apron but manages to springboard back in to take down Charlotte and Beth. Charlotte pairs off with Naomi as Beth tries to get rid of Belair and Toni Storm is in at #20, giving us Charlotte, Naomi, Phoenix, Belair and Storm.

Belair goes up top and Charlotte tosses her out, with the fans not being pleased. Kelly Kelly is in at #21 and hits her screaming headscissors on Storm. The Stinkface to Storm is Kelly having more fun as Beth goes nuts trying to get rid of Charlotte. Sarah Logan is in at #22 and Charlotte gets rid of her in a hurry. Kelly tries to dump Charlotte and gets knocked out a second later for her efforts.

Natalya is in at #23 for a bunch of discus lariats, followed by teaming up with Beth for a powerbomb to bring Charlotte out of the corner. Xia Li is in at #24 and starts with the rapid fire kicks as the back of Beth’s head is busted open. Zelina Vega is in at #25 and hurricanranas Beth, who probably shouldn’t be messed with given her head. Charlotte survives a three on one elimination attempt and Shotzi Blackheart is in at #26.

Naomi gets sent to the apron but runs down the steps and dives onto the barricade with her feet inches above the floor. She gets onto an announcers’ table and tries to figure it out as Carmella is in at #27. Carmella gets a very long headscissors on Natalya as Naomi goes to another table. The Glam Slam hits Charlotte as Naomi goes to the third table. Charlotte goes through the ropes to the floor to a big reaction as fans have some false hope. Tegan Nox is in at #28 and walks into a Glam Slam as Beth’s hair is almost half red from all of the blood.

Naomi FINALLY uses an announcers’ table cover to make it back to the ring as Baszler gets rid of Carmella, plus Storm who was put out somewhere in there. Naomi is back in and the missed Rear View lets Baszler get rid of her as well. Natalya and Beth get together for a Hart Attack on Baszler but Beth dumps Natalya in a surprise. Charlotte tries to dump Baszler and Beth but they both save themselves, meaning it’s a Charlotte vs. Baszler showdown. That’s broken up and Baszler gets rid of Phoenix but can’t toss Charlotte, who skins the cat and eliminates Baszler to win at 54:31.

Rating: B. A few weeks back, I picked Charlotte to win, no matter how illogical or annoying it might be because that’s what Charlotte does. I changed my mind to Baszler because that made more sense and now here we are, because WWE can’t help themselves with Charlotte. It’s such an anti-climactic ending because Charlotte has been in a major spot so many times that it doesn’t mean anything anymore. And now, more weeks of hearing how great Charlotte is, because we haven’t heard that recently enough.

Other than that, this was a very good Rumble with far better pacing than last year and the NXT women carrying the slack. Belair and Baszler looked like killers and I’m hoping Shayna is main roster bound. There’s nothing left for her to do in NXT and she looked awesome here. Even the Santina bit was funny for some comedy. This was a solid Rumble, despite the disappointing ending.

Post match, Charlotte says she knows some people aren’t happy with her winning but she’s the diamond and will win the title again.

Corbin says Reigns made a mockery of their match so tonight, he’s tossing Roman.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Lacey Evans

Lacey is challenging and her daughter is here. Bayley gets taken down early to start so she goes to the corner to try for a turnbuckle. That just earns her a sweep of the leg and a slingshot elbow, meaning it’s time to claim a knee injury. The obvious goldbricking is obvious and Bayley hits her with a forearm, setting up a top rope elbow for two on Evans. Bayley grabs a chinlock as we hear Lacey’s military resume. The hold stays on for a good while and Bayley mocks Evans for being a mother. That’s quite the odd insult.

Evans fights up and gets in a knee from the apron. A slingshot rollup gets two but Bayley mocks the salute, allowing Evans to dodge a middle rope crossbody. The slingshot dropkick hits Bayley (and Evans has to catch her foot on the rope to keep from falling). Bayley rolls to the floor and avoids a slingshot dive, drawing hisses from Lacey’s daughter. Back in and the Bayley to Belly is blocked but so is the double jump moonsault, with Bayley grabbing a rollup with trunks to retain at 9:23.

Rating: C-. I got a nice chuckle out of Lacey losing in front of her daughter because having a child is quite the stretch for a reason to cheer for her. Bayley retaining the title is a bit of a shaky decision, but I’d assume that we’re getting Charlotte vs. Bayley at Wrestlemania in one of those fresh matches that WWE loves. Kind of boring, but it was coming after a huge match and there wasn’t much they could do.

We recap the Fiend vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Fiend beat him at Survivor Series so Bryan brought back the YES Movement (and cut his hair) for one more shot. This time it’s a strap match so Fiend can’t run away.

Smackdown World Title: Fiend vs. Daniel Bryan

Fiend is defending and they’re strapped together at the wrist with pin or submission to win. More importantly though: NO RED LIGHTS! After the Big Match Intros, Bryan goes right at him in the corner with the kicks and right hands. Those just earn him a powerbomb though as Fiend doesn’t seem to mind the pain. It’s time to start the whipping and a headbutt rocks Bryan. A missed charge puts Fiend on the floor so Bryan tries a dive, only to get sent into the barricade.

Alternating YES Kicks and whips keep Fiend down and the big one connects. Fiend pops back up and asks for more so Bryan kicks him in the head again. The running knee is countered into Sister Abigail for two and Fiend looks confused. Bryan is back with a kick to the face but Fiend slaps on the Mandible Claw with Bryan on the top.

Bryan pulls him into a triangle but Fiend keeps the Claw on, only to get reversed into the LeBell Lock with the strap over the mouth. That’s broken up as well though and Fiend whips him some more. Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two and another running knee gets another two. Fiend pops up again and stares down at Bryan, who whips him with the strap. That just earns him the Claw, including a Claw slam, for the pin to retain at 17:28.

Rating: B. They beat each other up rather well, though the lack of drama on the near falls hurt a lot. What didn’t hurt a lot was the lack of the red light, which didn’t take away a lot of the monster effect but did take away a lot of the stupid. Fiend came off as in control here though, as he looked like he shrugged off everything Bryan threw at him and then won the match because he was done with the torture. Bryan can move on to something else now and Fiend can get ready for something at Wrestlemania. Good match, but not much drama.

Post match Fiend disappears and Bryan has to be helped out. He probably does need a break after this one.

Super Showdown is confirmed for Saudi Arabia on February 27.

We recap Asuka vs. Becky Lynch for the Raw Women’s Title. Asuka beat Lynch last year at the Royal Rumble, which was Becky’s last loss before she went on towards the main event of Wrestlemania. Lynch has been champion since and wants to avenge her loss.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

Asuka is challenging and has Kairi Sane with her. Becky avoids a dropkick to start and Asuka seems to be favoring her arm early on. Her feet are fine though as she kicks Lynch down to take over. Asuka throws her into the corner but charges into some elbows. A bulldog into a low dropkick gives the champ two and she hits a release front suplex off the apron.

Back in and the guillotine legdrop gives Becky two but Asuka slugs away. Something like a suplex into a sitdown drop gives Asuka two and they fight to the apron. That means a hip attack can send Becky into the post, but she’s right back with a middle rope Rock Bottom for two. Becky goes up again and mistimes a dive into a Codebreaker, only to go for the arm immediately after the kickout.

That’s broken up with a foot on the rope so Asuka unloads with kicks to the head. Becky has to grab the referee to prevent the referee stoppage so Asuka kicks her in the head for a very close near fall. A quick Disarm-Her attempt doesn’t work so Becky plants her for two instead. Becky goes for the arm again but the referee almost gets bumped. Asuka loads up the mist but Becky kicks her in the ribs, sending the mist into the arm. Now the Disarm-Her can go on to make Asuka tap at 16:32.

Rating: B. Another good match here as Becky gets the win over the one person she couldn’t beat. They beat each other up with Becky seeming desperate to finally beat Asuka, who was ruthless with her aggression. Asuka’s cheating coming back to cost her the match played into their story well too. This doesn’t leave her with many options, but she could wind up against Baszler or Ronda Rousey at Wrestlemania, either of which could be awesome. With the match out of the way, maybe WWE can remember that Asuka is already a champion.

The Street Profits aren’t sure who will win the Royal Rumble, with Dawkins humming various theme musics.

Bobby Lashley and Rusev are out of the Rumble after getting in a fight in the parking lot earlier today.

Booker T. joins commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals, Brock Lesnar is in at #1 and Elias is in at #2 (more bad luck as he was #1 last year). Elias talks about the gorilla in the ring and asks the fans to clap along for his new song, Sacrificial Lamb. Lesnar gets annoyed at the song and chases Elias (tripping a bit on the way out of the ring), meaning the match can start with Brock taking him down.

The first German suplex connects and Lesnar breaks the guitar over Elias’ back. That’s the first elimination so Brock gets a breather until Erick Rowan, with crate, is in at #3. Rowan blocks the German suplex and gets clotheslined out in about eight seconds. Robert Roode is in at #4, slugs away, gets clotheslined, F5, Brock stands alone. Brock poses with the title until John Morrison is in at #5 and it’s a belly to belly over the top in nine seconds.

Kofi Kingston is in at #6 and starts slugging away until Lesnar drives him into the corner. The first German suplex drops Kofi on his head and Brock starts smiling. The clock speeds WAY up so Rey Mysterio can come in at #7. Rey tries to run the ropes but gets sent into Kofi in the corner.

Ricochet is in at #15 and gets caught with a quick backbreaker. There’s a German suplex as Cole says he doesn’t want to hear about Lesnar not defending his title. In a non-title match. Drew McIntyre is in at #16 and gets in a staredown with Lesnar. Ricochet gets in a low blow from behind and McIntyre eliminates Lesnar to a nice reaction. McIntyre gets rid of Ricochet as well and Miz is in at #17.

Drew knocks Miz down and glares down at Lesnar, setting up the Claymore to get rid of Miz and stand alone. Lesnar and Heyman are still standing behind the barricade as AJ Styles is in at #18. Some early shots take AJ down but he pulls McIntyre down into the Calf Crusher. That’s broken up as well and Dolph Ziggler is in at #19.

Ziggler and AJ double team McIntyre until Ziggler punches AJ in the face. That means a suplex from McIntyre as Karl Anderson is in at #20, giving us McIntyre, Styles, Ziggler and Anderson. Everything settles down and it’s EDGE (THAT FREAKING LIAR!) at #21. Spears abound and we get an Edge vs. Styles showdown, capped off by another spear. King Corbin is in at #22 (YOU SHALL NOT BE ENTERTAINED!!!) and cleans house with Ziggler until Edge dumps AJ (who may have been favoring his wrist).

Reigns no sells McIntyre’s chops and it’s Kevin Owens at lucky #27. Cannonballs abound and there’s a Stunner to Reigns. Another one hits Orton and it’s Aleister Black in at #28. A jumping knee hits Owens and a running one drops Edge, followed by Black Mass to McIntyre. Samoa Joe is in at #29 and Black is waiting on him with the strikes.

Joe kicks him down, smiles at Owens, and starts the slugout again. Seth Rollins is in st #30 (sweet, no Velasquez), giving us Orton, Reigns, Owens, Black, McIntyre, Edge, Rollins and Joe. Rollins comes out with Buddy Murphy (who was scheduled to be in this) and the AOP so Joe and Owens roll outside to start the fight. Rollins and Murphy pull Edge outside before throwing Orton over the announcers’ table (not eliminated).

The Stomp hits Reigns and Rollins eliminates Black and Owens. The Koquina Clutch has Rollins in trouble but Murphy makes the save so Rollins can eliminate Joe as well. Owens, Black and Joe brawl to the back with Murphy/AOP, leaving us with Reigns, Rollins, Edge, Orton and McIntyre. Everyone surrounds Rollins so he tries to reunite with Reigns. That just earns him a Superman punch into an Orton powerslam into the Claymore so McIntyre can get the elimination.

Reigns hangs onto the bottom rope to stay alive and he pulls Edge to the apron with him. Edge gets knocked off and Reigns gets back in for the fight with McIntyre, who nails the Claymore. McIntyre tosses Reigns to win at 1:00:09 (Sally, I know you’re smiling. Don’t worry if you don’t get this reference.).

Rating: B+. The ending is what matters most here, as McIntyre has been ready to move up to the next level for the better part of ever now. They FINALLY pulled the trigger on him and while it is another step to win the World Title at Wrestlemania, this is a heck of a good sign for him and his future.

Then there’s the first half of the Rumble and your mileage is probably going to vary. I wasn’t wild on it, but it didn’t ruin the match for me. I didn’t need Lesnar to run through that many people, but at least the right person won in the end and we should be in for a big Wrestlemania showdown. It could have been a lot worse, and McIntyre winning warms the cockles of my heart (whatever cockles are).

Drew looks very emotional to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. It’s a good show and WAY better than last year’s (partially due to it being half an hour shorter) with Reigns vs. Corbin and Bayley vs. Evans not being great. Other than that, it’s a very solid show with two good Rumbles and one good winner. Becky vs. Asuka was awesome too and Bryan vs. Fiend was solid storytelling. Wrestlemania is feeling a lot more interesting than it was just a few days ago and that’s the best feeling you can have coming out of this show. Now just keep it up going into Tampa.

Results

Roman Reigns b. King Corbin – Spear

Charlotte won the Women’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Shayna Baszler

Bayley b. Lacey Evans – Rollup with trunks

Fiend b. Daniel Bryan – Mandible Claw

Becky Lynch b. Asuka – Disarm-Her

Drew McIntyre won the Men’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Roman Reigns

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2019
Date: January 27, 2019
Location: Chase Field, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

It’s the first of the Big Four pay per views and that means it’s time to really get going with the busiest season of the year. In this case that means a pair of Royal Rumble matches, which may or may not have the highest levels of drama. I’m not sure who we’ll be seeing tonight, but it could be interesting. Let’s get to it.

The stadium looks huge, though it doesn’t look full.

Kickoff Show: Bobby Roode/Chad Gable vs. Rezar/Scott Dawson

THIS NEEDED TO BE ADDED TO THE SHOW??? If Rezar and Dawson win, both of their teams get future title shots. Akam is injured at the moment in case this is even more confusing than it seems. As a bonus, the cameraman falls over while trying to get a closeup of Roode during his entrance. Roode and Dawson start things off with Scott getting caught in a wristlock. It’s back to Gable but Rezar comes in to hammer away with the heavy forearms.

With Gable properly beaten, Dawson comes in for a suplex, followed by a chinlock. That’s rather old school of him. Back up and they slug it out until a shove into the ropes sends Gable head first into Dawson, meaning a double knockdown. Rezar comes in but gets caught in the armbreaker over the ropes. Everything breaks down and Dawson runs into Rezar by mistake, setting up the moonsault/neckbreaker combination to finish Dawson at 6:55.

Rating: D+. Well that was a distinct waste of time. The match was added to the card as a bonus and the not exactly interesting champions defeated their makeshift challengers, as in the team they should beat, without much effort. So much for having the Revival get somewhere out of all their recent drama, at least for one night. You couldn’t possibly have Rezar lose here you see. He doesn’t have a partner at the moment, but it makes more sense to beat half of the Revival. Again.

Kickoff Show: US Title: Rusev vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Rusev is defending and goes straight with the corner shoulders to the ribs. A running clothesline puts Nakamura on the floor but he gets in a shot against the barricade to take over. Back in and some Bad Vibrations set up the running knee to the ribs as they’re doing just about the same match (at least the same pace) as before. The knees to the head don’t do too much damage to Rusev as he’s right back with the spinwheel kick for two.

Nakamura bails to the floor so Rusev loads up a suicide dive (!), which is cut off by a kick to the head. Well thank goodness for that. Nakamura fires off more kicks to the head for a near fall but Rusev ax handles him down. You don’t see that one very often, but you do see the Machka Kick, which makes it even worse.

Rusev gets caught in a triangle choke until a suplex finally gets him out of trouble. Nakamura kicks him down again so the referee checks on Rusev, allowing Nakamura to go after the turnbuckle pad. It’s Lana offering a distraction but she gets knocked off the apron and hurts her ankle. Rusev is distracted again, and this time a running knee to the back of the head gives Nakamura the title back at 10:15.

Rating: C. I’m so glad they gave Rusev the title so they could give it back to Nakamura to restart his nothing reign. That title is the kiss of death at the moment with no one getting anything out of it. It’s not like either of them being champion means anything more than the other, but this is kind of a confusing choice.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Buddy Murphy vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Kalisto vs. Hideo Itami

Murphy is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Everyone goes for rollups to start but can’t get anywhere so Tozawa puts Murphy in a Black Widow. Kalisto makes a save and snaps off a hurricanrana to send Murphy outside. Itami starts cleaning house and wins a strike off with Murphy, followed by knocking Kalisto outside.

Tozawa’s dive takes Murphy out but Kalisto gets back in to clean house, including monkey flipping Tozawa off the apron onto Murphy. This time it’s Tozawa heading back inside to take over, capped off by the suicide headbutt on Itami. Buddy is back up with the running flip dive to the floor onto all three. Kalisto is up first with a hurricanrana driver for two on Murphy as the all over the place offense continues.

Murphy powerbombs Kalisto out of the corner for the same with Tozawa having to make a save. The Salida Del Sol gets a VERY close two on Itami but Murphy takes over again. It’s Itami hitting an enziguri on Murphy so Tozawa and Kalisto break it up with stereo superkicks. Murphy is right back up and countering whatever Itami’s finisher is supposed to be, setting up Murphy’s Law to retain at 12:07.

Rating: C+. This was exactly what it was supposed to be with a bunch of spots and all kinds of entertainment going on. It didn’t need to be anything more than a fast paced spotfest and that’s what they did here. Murphy retaining is fine and I liked the match well enough. It also didn’t overstay its welcome, which is often a problem with a match like this. Good stuff here.

The opening video looks at what the Rumble means, both as a show and as a match itself. This includes some history of the match, meaning some comedy, which doesn’t really fit with the serious nature of the video.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Becky Lynch

Asuka is defending after taking the title from Becky in a triple threat match last month. Becky gets shoved down as there’s a rather loud high pitched noise. Back up and Asuka kicks the leg out but gets hip attacked out to the floor. Asuka misses the running kick off the apron and gets her own leg kicked out to put Becky in control for the first time. Back in and Becky sends her face first into the corner before stomping away for good measure. It’s too early for the arm but Asuka misses the running hip attack and gets caught in the ropes.

That’s fine though as it’s the Asuka Lock from the ropes for a few seconds. The missing continues though as Asuka goes shoulder first into the post, setting up a Disarm-Her in the ropes. Becky dives into a knee to the face though and the hip attack connects for two. The missile dropkick misses and Becky gets her own two off a bell to belly. Asuka is right back with most of an Asuka Lock, allowing Becky to roll to the ropes.

They fight to the apron and it’s a fisherman’s neckbreaker (I think) Asuka onto the floor for a huge (and scary looking) crash. They’re both alive and get back in for the slugout with Becky getting the better of it. Asuka gets caught in a super Bexploder for a very close two as the fans are getting way into these near falls.

Becky misses the middle rope legdrop though and gets pulled into the Disarm-Her, which is reversed into an Asuka Lock (on Asuka) for a pretty sweet sequence that you don’t see from the women. Asuka flips back for two and there’s the big kick to the head. Becky pulls her down into the Disarm-Her but this time it’s Asuka escaping. The full Asuka Lock goes on and Asuka flips forward into something close to Cattle Mutilation for the clean tap at 16:37.

Rating: B+. Very good match here with some crazy counters, though having Becky tap clean feels like a bad idea. I fully expect her to come back in and win the Rumble for the title shot, but this was a great example of WWE booking themselves into a corner. This could have been Charlotte losing instead and giving Asuka her win back from Wrestlemania, but instead they take something away from Becky before she’s likely winning later in the night, or at Elimination Chamber. Just seems unnecessary.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Shane McMahon/The Miz vs. The Bar

Shane and Miz are challenging in matching baseball jerseys. Shane takes Sheamus down at the bell because that’s what you do to a four time World Champion. We officially start with Cesaro vs. Miz as Miz can’t get a Skull Crushing Finale. The double teaming begins in the corner so it’s Shane running over for a quick save. Shane gets knocked off the apron (I think that’s enough to make Sheamus a five time World Champion) but he’s right back to save Miz from a powerbomb through the announcers’ table.

The big elbow is broken up so Shane hits a top rope clothesline on Sheamus instead. Cesaro uppercuts him in the face though and the double backbreaker gets two on Miz. Sheamus hits a middle rope knee to the chest for the same and it’s off to the ten forearms to the chest for a bonus. Miz fights out of a chinlock as this is somehow still going. The hot tag brings in Shane for the umping elbow to Sheamus and the horrible spinning DDT on Cesaro. Coast to Coast is broken up by Cesaro so Shane knocks him into the corner as well.

Since Shane can beat up one of the most successful tag teams of the modern era on his own. Thankfully Cesaro counters into the Swing, and it’s a LONG one with the fans giving him a quick standing ovation. Shane is fine of course and grabs what was supposed to be a triangle choke until Sheamus makes the save. Miz gets dropped on the floor and the spike White Noise, which pinned Seth Rollins last year, gets two. Miz breaks up the Brogue Kick so it takes out Cesaro instead, setting up Shane’s shooting star press for the pin and the titles at 13:23.

Rating: D. Not only was the match boring, but Shane McMahon just won a title in 2019. This is also the second stupid title loss for the Bar in less than a year after they lost to a ten year old at Wrestlemania. I’m sure they’ll get the titles back, but my goodness what is the point in this? To set up Shane vs. Miz at Wrestlemania? Is that what anyone wants to see?

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Sasha Banks. Rousey tried to be nice to Banks but Sasha got serious and promised to make Rousey tap. That was enough to set Rousey off and we have a fired up champ.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Sasha Banks

Rousey is defending. It’s way too early for the submissions so Rousey throws her into the corner and stops for some taunting. Rousey goes for Three Amigos but has to slip out of a Bank Statement attempt. Back up and Banks slaps her in the face, earning herself a kick to the ribs. They fight outside with Rousey punching the post, allowing Banks to hit a heck of a suicide dive. Things finally slow down a bit with Rousey grabbing a chinlock until Banks shoves her into the corner for some running knees.

An elbow to the face puts Banks down but she comes back up with some loud slaps to the back. The Rope walk sets up a Codebreaker to the bad arm and a running knee gets two. More running knees miss in the corner so Rousey tries Piper’s Pit, only to be reversed into a heck of an armbar on the bad arm. Rousey starts to roll out but gets pulled into the Bank Statement. It’s too close to the ropes though and now Piper’s Pit connects.

For some reason Rousey goes up top, earning herself a superplex for two. The armbar goes on again as you can’t say Banks isn’t focused. Rousey is all fired up and hits three straight judo throws by the arm. Banks sends her outside again though and Rousey’s arm is just hanging there. Another suicide dive is countered into the Beast Mode armbar on the floor to make Sasha tap, which didn’t make a ton of sense but looked awesome as you got the Death Stare.

Back in and Rousey unloads with right hands and a running knee of her own for two. Banks sends her arm first into the corner again though and it’s a double stomp onto the arm. The Backstabber is countered into an armbar attempt but another Piper’s Pit is countered into a crossbody for two. The Bank Statement can’t quite go on so it’s a Fujiwara armbar in the middle of the ring. Rousey rolls out of that as well and it’s a gutwrench suplex into Piper’s Pit for the pin at 13:48, though it looked like Rousey’s shoulders were down as well.

Rating: B+. I liked this even more than I was expecting to and it was a heck of a match. The arm stuff made sense and I’m glad they went with that instead of the back/ribs stuff that we’ve done a few times now. Banks looked more motivated than she has in years here and that’s not exactly surprising. As a bonus, Rousey was really showing off the athleticism here and made herself look even more talented than usual. Very good match and worth seeing.

Post match Rousey tries to show respect and gives her the Four Horsewomen sign but Banks isn’t having it and storms off.

Kickoff Show recap.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals. Beth Phoenix is out for commentary and it’s Lacey Evans in at #1 and gives a rather condescending promo about wanting to clean up the division. Natalya is in at #2, which is quite the letdown after that kind of a setup. Lacey flips away from Natalya to start but they both miss dropkicks at the same time. The nipup doesn’t quite work for Lacey and it’s a wristlock to keep her in trouble. A hurricanrana takes Natalya down though and it’s Mandy Rose in at #3.

Natalya is right back up and does the still ridiculous looking double Sharpshooter until Liv Morgan is in at #4….and is eliminated in about two seconds off a Natalya backdrop. Lacey turns on Mandy but stops to pull a napkin from her trunks and wipe down a bit before throwing it at the other two (make your own Priscilla Kelly jokes). Mickie James is in at #5 and kicks Natalya in the head. No one goes for an elimination until Ember Moon is in at #6 to a big reaction (complete with a CGI moon, making me want to play Major’s Mask). Moon gets in all the usual until Mandy catches her in the corner.

Billie Kay is in at #7 but says she’s staying outside until Peyton Royce is here. Smart move actually and perfectly legal. Nikki Cross is in at #8 and sprints to ringside where she beats up Kay. House is cleaned but Lacey manages to avoid getting thrown out. Kay is inside now as the ring is starting to get too full. Peyton Royce is in at #9 and helps Billie up to go after Nikki. Some double teaming keeps her in trouble but there’s no elimination as Tamina is in at #10.

We currently have Evans, Natalya, Rose, James, Moon, Kay, Cross, Royce and Tamina. Kay goes after Tamina and nearly gets thrown out, but instead Tamina goes after Cross and this the top rope splash. A superkick puts James out and it’s Xia Li (of the Mae Young Classic) in at #11. Some kicks to the head drop Tamina and even more put everyone else down. Xia stands tall as Sara Logan is in at #12. The IIconics get together and dumb Cross in a rather quick elimination.

Charlotte is in at #13 and you can tell things are getting serious. Li gets sent to the apron and booted out as the ring is suddenly a lot less full. Tamina scores with a superkick and it’s Kairi Sane in at #14. The IIconics seem to have been eliminated as Sane is having way too much fun with her telescope. Charlotte gets Tamina out and there’s the top rope forearm from Sane to Moon. Charlotte welcomes the chops from Sane, who moves on to knocking Logan down.

The Insane Elbow connects and Natalya knocks Logan out. Maria Kanellis is in at #15 to get us to halftime and hopefully write off some of the rumors about her leaving. A double bulldog has Charlotte and Moon down but for some reason Maria stops for a dance, allowing Charlotte to nail her with a spear. Naomi is in at #16 and hits a sitout jawbreaker on Rose, as you had to expect.

A suplex to the apron sets up a kick to the head and Mandy is out. Naomi takes her time on the apron though and gets powerbombed against the barricade, only to kick Mandy in the head and crawl up onto the barricade. The tightrope walk lets Naomi get around for a Kofi Kingston-esque dive to the steps (that was VERY impressive) but Mandy pulls her to the floor anyway. Charlotte kicks Evans out and it’s Candice LeRae in at #17 for another NXT surprise. A Black Widow has Ember in trouble but she comes back with a gutbuster to put Candice down.

Some headscissors let Kacy put some people down with one putting Fox onto the apron. Zelina Vega (as someone from Street Fighter) is in at #20, giving us Natalya, Moon, Charlotte, Sane, LeRae, Fox, Catanzaro and Vega. LeRae and Vega go at it as a followup from NXT and it’s Ruby Riott, flanked by Morgan and Logan, in at #21. The Squad pull people underneath the ropes to cause some chaos but do managed to eliminate Fox and LeRae as Vega is hiding underneath the ring.

Dana Brooke is in at #22 and hits a heck of a sitout powerbomb on Catanzaro. The Squad keeps pulling people outside without eliminating most of them as Io Shirai is in at #23. She beats up the Squad in short order and hits the moonsault to the floor (she was never in so it’s not an elimination).

Riott and Shirai fight to the apron and it’s Rhea Ripley in at #24. She throws Catanzaro to the floor but Catanzaro lands on her back, allowing her to backflip onto the barricade and then hand walk to the post, where she flips up and climbs back in. Ripley throws her out without much of a problem, but WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT AND WHY CAN SHE DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT???

Sonya Deville is in at #25 and Brooke is eliminated as Vega keeps watching…..and Hornswoggle pops out from underneath the ring skirt next to her. The chase is on and Vega goes inside where she’s eliminated in short order. Alexa Bliss makes her return at #26 and moonsaults into double knees to Moon’s chest. A sunset bomb plants Charlotte and it’s Sonya unloading on Bliss in the corner. Bliss gets rid of Sonya and it’s Bayley (to a pop) at #27.

That means the pace can pick up and it’s Riott and Ripley being tossed out. Lana is in at #28 and selling the ankle from earlier in the night. The fans are begging for Becky to come out and take her place as Lana has taken over a minute to get about a third of the way to the ring. Nia Jax is in at #29 and jumps Lana on the way to the ring so I think you know where this is going. Shirai moonsault onto Jax but gets thrown outside, landing hard onto her ankle. Jax throws Natalya out as well and it’s Carmella in at #30, giving us a final field of Charlotte, Bayley, Jax, Sane, Moon, Bliss and maybe Lana, who never got in the ring.

With Carmella taking Jax down, here’s Becky to appeal to Fit Finlay (I call international collusion!) to let her take Lana’s spot. Finlay agrees and we have the final field. We get straight to the Becky vs. Jax showdown and Becky unloads on her to a freaking roar. Bliss pulls Moon to the apron and it’s a leg trip to get rid of Moon after 53 minutes. Bayley gives Bliss a buckle bomb and that’s enough for the elimination.

That leaves us with Bayley, Nia, Carmella, Charlotte and Becky. Jax gets knocked through the ropes and Charlotte reverses a running headscissors from Carmella but cant’ get rid of her. A running big boot knocks Carmella out and Bayley sends Charlotte to the apron. Nia throws Bayley out (with Bayley clutching her knee on the landing) to get us down to three. Becky rolls to the floor and Charlotte fireman’s carries Nia….nowhere actually.

Nia goes over the top and Becky pulls her out, leaving us with Charlotte vs. Becky, much to the fans’ approval. Nia pulls Becky off the apron though and we’ve got a knee injury. Becky charges inside anyway and gets her leg taken out rather quickly. Charlotte cranks on the leg but Becky pops up and sends her to the apron. A running shot is enough to get rid of Charlotte to give Becky the win at 1:11:23.

Rating: B. I think I liked this one more than last year’s. The winner was the predictable (not a bad thing) and right call, but the bigger deal here was the lack of legends. It’s a good sign that the divisions have grown enough that they can have one of these without having so many people added to the match from years past. The NXT women were a nice touch and the match never felt like it was dragging.

I wouldn’t mind for it to be a little less messy though, as there were too many people on the floor at various times and a few too many spots of people saving themselves. That being said, Catanzaro is not human and that save was incredible, likely more impressive than most of Kofi’s. The Hornswoggle spot was hilarious too and I’m very relieved that he was used for that instead of a Rumble entry. Good match here, as the division looks a lot deeper this year.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. Daniel Bryan turned heel back in November and won the title from Styles via a low blow. AJ Styles has turned it up a few notches though and is now the REAL AJ Styles again. This should be a heck of a match if given time, but it’s almost 10:00 and we have two World Title matches and a Royal Rumble to go.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending. AJ starts fast and slugs away but gets sent hard into the post for a trip to the floor. The shoulder is sent into the post again and it’s off to a hammerlock. Bryan seems very pleased with AJ possibly having a bloody nose and hammers away on the mat some more.

AJ gets back up with a suplex and right hands of his own, only to get suplexed onto the back of his head. Bryan gets sent outside for some kicks to the face as this is severely dragging. Back in and they trade submission finishers with AJ CRANKING on the leg in a painful looking visual. The rope is grabbed and Bryan kicks him down again. They head up top with AJ flipping out of a belly to back superplex before grabbing the Calf Crusher.

That’s broken up again but AJ gets kicked out of the air on a springboard attempt. Bryan takes the Pele though and they’re both down. Cue Erick Rowan of all people as they get back up, only to have Bryan enziguri the referee by mistake. The Styles Clash hits Bryan, drawing in Rowan to chokeslam Styles. The referee revives to count the pin as Bryan retains at 24:18.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of a match that wasn’t exactly great and didn’t need to take place at this point. It’s nearly 10:30 and we’re going to be lucky to finish this show by midnight. They’re already doing a rematch from Bryan pinning him clean and it was just to set up Rowan as Bryan’s enforcer. This wasn’t the right place and it came at the wrong time. It’s not bad, but it didn’t need to go this way.

We look at the big brawl after last night’s Takeover, which set up a six man tag during halftime of the Super Bowl.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Brock Lesnar. It’s literally billed as David vs. Goliath, with the much smaller Balor earning the shot when Braun Strowman lost his shot after destroying Vince McMahon’s limo. Balor seems to be in over his head but wants to fight, as is his custom.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Finn Balor

Balor is defending and charges straight at Lesnar at the bell. A few more shots have him in trouble but he catches a charge with a belly to belly. Balor wisely rolls outside with Brock following, only to get sent ribs first into the announcers’ table. Back in and it’s more belly to bellies to put Balor in more trouble.

A clothesline turns Balor inside out but Lesnar’s ribs are still banged up. Lesnar goes to finish with the F5, which is reversed into a hard DDT. Balor stomps away at the ribs and gets in a jumping double stomp. They head outside with Balor nailing the running flip dive as Lesnar is in trouble. Back in and the Coup de Grace connects for two, but Brock slaps on the Kimura for the tap at 8:37.

Rating: C+. This was good while it lasted but it was way too short and there was no way it was going to be much more without the extra time. Balor was game and trying with Lesnar doing his usual very good selling, but with less time than a Raw main event, there wasn’t much they could do.

Post match Balor hits some more German suplexes and an F5.

Jerry Lawler and JBL come out for commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

Elias is in at #1 and let’s have a song. Before he can sing though, it’s Jeff Jarrett in at #2 for the big music off. Jeff does his catchphrases and they agree to a duet but Elias punches him in the face and a guitar shot is enough to get rid of Jarrett. Shinsuke Nakamura is in at #3 and goes straight at Elias in the corner. Elias pops up with a rope walk as Kurt Angle is in at #4. Suplexed abound and it’s Big E. in at #5. The Big Ending to Big E. doesn’t work and it’s a bunch of knees, including one in the corner to get rid of Angle. Johnny Gargano is in at #6 and it’s a running hurricanrana on Elias.

A not great looking tornado DDT drops Big E., followed by the slingshot spear to Elias (Johnny must not like him). Jinder Mahal is in at #7 and after a few knees, is eliminated by Gargano. The Singh Brothers aren’t done though as they get dragged in for a beatdown from Elias and Big E. Samoa Joe is in at #8 and gets a rather strong reaction. The sidestep avoids Gargano’s middle rope kick to the face and a rake to the eyes is enough to get rid of Big E.

Curt Hawkins is in at #9, hits a forearm to Joe’s back, and then bails to the floor. For some reason he comes back in, only to walk into the Koquina Clutch. Elias makes a save so Hawkins can bail to the floor for some hiding underneath the ring. It’s Seth Rollins in at #10, giving us Elias, Nakamura, Gargano, Joe, Hawkins (underneath the ring) and Rollins. Seth gets rid of Elias in a hurry and it’s Titus O’Neil in at #11, complete with stopping to make sure he doesn’t slide underneath the ring.

Instead he sees Hawkins and goes after him underneath the ring, only to charge after him and get tossed in a hurry. Joe dumps Hawkins though and it’s Kofi Kingston in at #12. Rollins runs Nakamura over with an elbow and the clock seems to be getting a little faster as Mustafa Ali is in at #13. That means a rolling X Factor to Joe and a COME ON to Nakamura. Shinsuke charges and that’s enough for an elimination.

Ali hits a tornado DDT on Gargano but he runs into the overhead belly to belly from Joe into the corner. Dean Ambrose is in at #14 and it’s time for the showdown with Rollins. Dean knocks Kofi to the floor but Kofi puts his feet on the apron and rolls over until he gets to the steps. Kofi comes back in with a top rope DDT to Ambrose but Dean is right back up with Dirty Deeds to Gargano. Johnny is out but Kofi hits Dean with Trouble in Paradise. No Way Jose is in at #15 and is out so fast that he might have broken Santino Marella’s record.

No worries though as he and the conga line dance straight to the back. JBL: “Does he realize that he was just eliminated from the Royal Rumble?” Drew McIntyre is in at #16 and headbutts Jose before wrecking some of the conga line. It’s a series of Claymore kicks, including a great one to Joe, to put everyone down. Kofi gets knocked over the top as Xavier Woods is in at #17. As Kofi is getting shoved to the floor, he sunset flips Woods with only one foot touching, allowing Woods to stand up and piggyback Kofi to the steps. Once inside, Drew clotheslines them both out in a funny bit.

Pete Dunne is in at #18 and goes straight after Ali. Joe can’t suplex him and it’s time to go after a bunch of fingers. Dunne suplexes Ali onto Joe and Andrade is in at #19. A spinning DDT plants Dunne as there is some crazy talent in there. Apollo Crews is in at #20, giving us Joe, Rollins, Ali, Ambrose, McIntyre, Dunne, Andrade and Crews. Things slow down and it’s Aleister Black in at #21. A huge kick drops Ali and another one eliminates Ambrose. Shelton Benjamin is in at #22 with Paydirt to Benjamin, followed by Ali dumping Joe.

Shelton is out as well and it’s Dolph Ziggler in at #28. Hardy is knocked out and Ziggler gets rid of McIntyre as a bonus. Randy Orton is in at #29 and gets to stare down Strowman but the RKO is easily blocked. The powerslam connects and Strowman puts Andrade in an electric chair, while Andrade superplexes Ali. Rey adds something close to a high crossbody for the big crash, followed by Strowman going shoulder first into the post, as is his custom. R-Truth is in at #30….and Nia Jax jumps him from behind?

Nia takes his place, giving us Mysterio, Andrade, Ziggler, Orton, Strowman (on the floor), Ali, Rollins (on the floor) and Jax. Nia dumps Ali out and gets to star Orton down. The RKO is blocked so Ziggler superkicks Nia into the 619 (JBL: “Rey don’t do that!”). An RKO takes Jax down and it’s Rey baseball sliding her out. There’s an RKO to get rid of Rey but Andrade throws Orton out. We’re down to Ziggler, Strowman, Rollins and Andrade with Ziggler and Andrade striking it out.

Strowman comes back in to run them both over as Rollins is getting back up. That means the running shoulder on the floor and Strowman throws him inside, where the triple teaming begins on the monster. Strowman pops back up to get rid of Andrade and knocks Ziggler out as well. Rollins puts Strowman on the apron but charge into a chokeslam. Not over the top, but a chokeslam nonetheless. They get back in and Rollins pulls him to the apron by the head ala Chris Benoit and Big Show. It’s not enough for an elimination so Rollins sends him into the post and adds a Stomp for the win at 57:34.

Rating: D. It’s really hard to hate a match that had that kind of stretch in the teens but my goodness they missed on the final batch. Nia Jax as #30 wasn’t interesting and isn’t exactly an upgrade over someone who can at least do some funny stuff. The rest of the match wasn’t much better, as a lot of spots were wasted on nothing entries like Hawkins, O’Neil and Mahal. Throw in a comedy legend here or there to spice things up a bit and this is a lot better.

There were some good points here, as they went with the logical and obvious winner (not a bad thing) in Rollins and showcased a lot of young guys. Other than Black I can’t imagine any of them sticking around on the main roster but it’s nice to see them get a chance against the big names. Just….be more interesting.

Overall Rating: D+. There were parts here that worked but my goodness the length crippled this show. You could have EASILY shed an hour and a half off of this thing by dropping the Smackdown Tag Team Title match, the Smackdown Women’s Title match, and the Smackdown World Title match. Make Asuka vs. Becky (which was awesome) a big TV match and put Styles vs. Bryan on in a similar spot. Just because you can put something on the card doesn’t mean you should and that’s the big lesson here. This was almost an hour longer than last year’s way too long show because WWE refuses to hit the brakes.

There are good parts to the show but it’s the overall presentation that is severely lacking. It’s the length, it’s the lack of any surprises in the Rumbles (again: not a bad idea, but certainly not a thrilling one), it’s the lack of interesting names in the Rumble and it’s spending way too much time on stuff that doesn’t need to be on the show. I was begging for this show to be over at the halfway point and it just kept dragging along. There is no excuse for any show, including Wrestlemania, to be starting at 5 and ending at nearly midnight. That’s the big problem here and there’s very little that the wrestlers can do about it.

Results

Asuka b. Becky Lynch – Asuka Lock

Shane McMahon/The Miz b. The Bar – Shooting star press to Cesaro

Ronda Rousey b. Sasha Banks – Piper’s Pit

Becky Lynch won the Women’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Charlotte

Daniel Bryan b. AJ Styles – Pin after a chokeslam from Erick Rowan

Brock Lesnar b. Finn Balor – Kimura

Seth Rollins won the Men’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Braun Strowman

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2018
Date: January 28, 2018
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,629
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

It’s hard to believe that a year has passed since this show as I can barely remember most of the card. This show features the first ever all women’s Royal Rumble, which really is quite the milestone. Now of course they had to bring in a bunch of legends/former wrestlers who aren’t legends but are called such to fill in the lineup, but there are worse things to do. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Kalisto/Gran Metalik/Lince Dorado vs. TJP/Jack Gallagher/Drew Gulak

They aren’t the Lucha House Party yet but they’re the Lucha House Party. As usual, the arena is still mostly empty because we need to be having a match an hour and a half before the show starts. Kalisto and Gulak start things off with a weak POWERPOINT chant annoying Drew. The announcers talk about the upcoming 205 Live General Manager as Kalisto twists the knee around into something like a reverse Figure Four. Gulak rolls out so it’s Metalik and Gallagher (in his suit of course) coming in instead.

A quick takedown sends Gallagher outside where he insists a fan not boo him. TJP comes in and that earns him a triple dab from the House Party. We settle down to TJP and Dorado exchanging wristlocks until Kalisto comes in for a headlock. The pace picks up again but this time it’s Gulak coming in and flying over the top to the floor. All three luchadors get on the top and it’s a triple moonsault to the floor to pop the dozens of fans in attendance.

Back from a break with TJP dropkicking Dorado out of the air so the heat segment can begin. Gallagher hits a surfboard double stomp on the knees and it’s off to a leg crank. Gulak stomps away and it’s back to TJP to look annoyed at Dorado for not staying down. Instead it’s Gallagher going to the middle rope and looking terrified, allowing Dorado to roll away. After a quick lecture, Gulak comes in as Metalik gets the hot tag to pick up the pace. The rope walk elbow gets two as everything breaks down. The double Golden Rewind sets up a big double dive from Metalik for two on Gulak. A quick Salida Del Sol finishes TJP at 13:13.

Rating: C. For the life of me I don’t get the point in having these matches this early. There’s no one there and while the action was fine, it’s not like there’s anyone to react to them. They had a nice match here though with the dives taking them wherever they wanted to go. 205 Live was still figuring out a bunch of things but the match worked well enough because people who can fly around are always going to be worth a look.

The crowd has filled in now.

Kickoff Show: Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson vs Revival

What a lack of a difference a year makes. Revival is fresh off getting beaten up by a bunch of legends Dawson chops at Anderson in the corner until a dropkick gets him out of trouble. Dawson makes a tag from the floor (not sure if you can do that) and the distraction lets him rake Gallows’ eyes, though it doesn’t really do much. The threat of a right hand sends Revival outside and we take a break. Back with Dawson snapping Anderson’s knee over the middle rope to give the Revival a target.

Anderson gets double teamed in the corner as the announcers ignore the match to talk about Brock Lesnar. The leglocking begins so Anderson kicks him square in the jaw for the break. That’s always going to work but it’s not enough to get the hot tag off to Gallows. Another kick away allows the tag to Gallows so the pace can pick up. House is cleaned but the Magic Killer is broken up as Anderson comes back in for some reason. Anderson is fine enough to hit a kick to the head in the corner, only to have a chop block finish Anderson at 9:14.

Rating: C. Another match that only served as filler for the sake of filling time, which is one of the most annoying things you can have. It’s a match that didn’t need to exist and only served to burn off a little more of the crowd’s energy before we get to the matches that actually matter. The match was fine, though just another match that didn’t serve much of a purpose.

Kickoff Show: US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Mojo Rawley

Open challenge it seems. Roode is defending, having won the title less than two weeks ago. Before the match, Roode talks about winning the title and being the Glorious One. Rawley plants him with a shoulder but Roode is right back with a hard clothesline. A Russian legsweep gets two but it’s way too early for a Glorious DDT. Instead Rawley sends him outside and into the barricade for two as we take a break. Back with Roode still in trouble as Rawley drives knees into the ribs.

We hit the chinlock until Roode belly to back suplexes his way to freedom. The Blockbuster is countered but Roode slips off and grabs a neckbreaker for two more. Now the Blockbuster gets two but the Glorious DDT is broken up again. A spinebuster gives Rawley two and he sends Roode shoulder first into the post. The running right hand is blocked with a boot though and the (not very) Glorious DDT retains the title at 7:37.

Rating: D+. I for one am very glad that we had to sit through this as well, with Roode barely breaking a sweat to retain the title in a match that was never in doubt. Roode isn’t exactly thrilling as a face but even worse is the fact that he got stuck with the US Title of Death, which has hurt just about everyone it’s touched for a long time now.

The opening video talks about the opportunity for all, both in the Royal Rumbles and in the triple threat. Thankfully the rest of the card gets some time as well, even if Brock Lesnar still looms over everyone.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Owens and Zayn are challenging in a handicap match as part of the Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon love/hate Owens/Zayn story which was more about Shane than anyone else. I miss Sami’s heel stuff as he really is someone you want to see get punched in the face. Owens lets Sami start but he tags right back out. It’s another tag a few seconds later as they’re clearly filling in time here. That’s not a complaint as there’s only so much that can be realistically done in a match like this.

AJ takes Owens down without much effort so Kevin slides to the floor and tags Sami in from the floor to a rather nice reaction. Sami headlocks AJ for little avail as Saxton GOES OFF on Graves in the most emotional outburst I’ve ever heard from him. A cheap shot lets Owens take over on AJ with a hard whip into the corner getting two. They head outside (Owens: “We’ll play outside!”) with AJ being whipped ribs first into the barricade.

Back in and Sami grabs a quickly broken chinlock, allowing AJ to come back up slugging away at Owens. A missed Cannonball in the corner bangs up Owens’ knee to put him down for a bit, allowing AJ to pull Sami off the top for a breather. Owens tries to come back in but can’t do much on the knee, meaning it’s back to Sami who charges into a boot in the corner.

The moonsault into the reverse DDT plants Sami but Owens is back up again. This time he throws AJ out of the corner but Styles catches Sami in a hurricanrana to send him outside. AJ grabs the Calf Crusher on Owens until Sami dives in for save. Owens, with his knee fine in a hurry, misses a charge into the post but is still able to superkick AJ into the Blue Thunder Bomb for a close two. Not exactly Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree in the Cell but not bad. Important note: Sami had pinned AJ with the Blue Thunder Bomb earlier in the week, so the move was suddenly a threat. The little things like that can go a long way.

AJ slips out of a superplex attempt and scores with the Phenomenal Forearm to Sami as Owens makes a save. Sami dives over to Owens for a tag and gets sent outside, leaving Owens’ Pop Up Powerbomb to be countered into a rollup to retain AJ’s title at 15:50. The replay shows that Sami might not have actually tagged, meaning AJ pinned the wrong man.

Rating: C+. This was only going to be so good as you can only make AJ be so much of an underdog before he wins. Owens and Zayn are a great heel act but they just lost almost clean to one guy. Yeah it’s AJ Styles, but that’s not exactly the best way to present them. It doesn’t help that it’s just part of a story involving Shane McMahon as a screwy boss, but you know we’re not escaping him anymore.

Wrestlemania ad. I forgot how sick I got of that song.

Sami and Kevin complain to Shane about what happened and he really doesn’t care.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin

Gable and Benjamin are challenging and this is 2/3 falls. Before the match, the Usos yell a lot about this being their house and how they’re going to win in the Uso Penitentiary. Shelton shoulders Jey down to start and Jey seems rather pleased. Gable comes in but a blind tag lets Jey come in and break up Rolling Chaos Theory. The challengers take a break on the floor before a chop block takes Jimmy’s knee out.

Shelton hits one of his own and it’s time to really work the knee over with a Robinsdale Crunch into a regular leglock. Some stereo running knees to the face drop Jimmy again and the charge continues to knock Jey off the apron as a bonus. Since WWE tends to do the same things over and over, the hot tag comes through a few seconds alter, allowing Jey to speed things up and hit a big dive to the floor.

Back in and a running hip attack in the corner looks to set up the Superfly Splash but Gable is up just in time. Some rollups get two as Shelton comes back in to load up a powerbomb. Chad has to dropkick Jimmy down instead though, leaving Shelton to powerbomb Jey into Jimmy instead. A good looking moonsault to the floor drops both Usos, though it’s not exactly enough to wake the fans up.

Rating: D+. The action wasn’t bad but what in the world was the point of the 2/3 falls stipulation? This was a watchable match but it wasn’t anything more than and the fans really didn’t care. I’m not sure what they were going for here and given that the whole show went over four hours, this really could have been cut to shave off nearly twenty minutes total.

Rumble By The Numbers. That never gets old.

Jerry Lawler comes out for commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals here, which has hit and miss results. Rusev is in at #1 and Finn Balor is in at #2. Aiden English does Rusev’s intro to a very, very strong reaction. You knew Philadelphia would be a Rusev Day town. Rusev wastes no time in trying to dumb Balor but has to take him down for an elbow instead. The running spinwheel kick cuts Balor off again and it’s Rhyno in at #3. Makes sense in the ECW Arena and I could go for Lawler making fun of ECW forever. Rhyno starts cleaning house and it’s already time for the ECW chants. Clotheslines abound until Rusev spinwheel kicks Rhyno down as well.

Baron Corbin is in at #4 because I couldn’t even avoid him back then. Corbin cleans a bit of the house and catches a charging Rhyno with Deep Six. That’s enough to toss Rhyno but Balor dumps Corbin a few seconds later to get us back to two. Corbin isn’t cool with that and pulls Balor to the floor (not eliminated) for a whip into the barricade. Rusev takes End of Days and everyone is down. Heath Slater is in at #5 and gets dropped on the ramp to put everyone down again.

Elias, with guitar of course, is in at #6 and since everyone is down, let’s have a song! See, now this makes some sense and is a proper way to fill in some time and keep things fresh. After a kick to Slater on the way down the ramp, Elias confirms that the people do indeed want to walk with Elias. You always have to make sure of course. The song is about spitting in the face of the Rocky Statue (TOO FAR!) but the countdown clock cuts him off and it’s Andrade Cien Almas (NXT Champion with Zelina Vega) in at #7. Now that’s a nice move and having it happen the night after he won a classic match makes it even better.

Almas wastes no time in hitting the running knees in the corner but the hammerlock DDT is broken up. Bray Wyatt is in at #8 and walks rather to the ring rather quickly. Before he gets in, he beats Slater up on the floor and sends him into the barricade, meaning Slater still hasn’t gotten in yet. Balor gets up and saves Elias from Sister Abigail but gets knocked down as it’s all Wyatt. Big E. is in at #9 but first, we need to have some pancakes. A single belly to belly drops Wyatt, only to have Rusev pop up with a superkick to Big E.

Tye Dillinger somehow gets #10 again….but hang on a second as Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens jumps him from behind so Sami can take his spot (while knocking Slater down again to continue the running gag). That gives us Rusev, Balor, Slater (on the floor), Elias, Almas, Wyatt, Big E. and Zayn. Nothing of note happens until Sheamus is in at #11 and he even throws Slater inside….and gets clotheslined out just as fast. Sheamus’ shocked face is rather good, though the fans aren’t happy when Wyatt eliminates Slater a few seconds later. Everyone is down again until Xavier Woods is in at #12 so 2/3 of New Day can start to clean house, thereby waking the crowd up a bit.

The fans get way into the countdown as Apollo Crews is in at #13, which should kill the crowd all over again. I’m not sure why they’re so quiet here but maybe they’re waiting for the big finish instead. Again not much happens and it’s Shinsuke Nakamura at #14 to fill up the ring even more. The fans are into Nakamura as he starts cleaning house, including the running knee in the corner to get rid of Zayn for old times’ sake.

Cesaro is in at #15 and gets to clean house as the fans get behind Rusev. They’re quite fickle in Philadelphia. Kofi Kingston is in at #16 and the New Day is at full strength. Apollo nearly gorilla presses Cesaro out but gets sent to the apron himself, allowing Cesaro to uppercut him out. Jinder Mahal is in at #17 because we’re just that lucky. Woods dropkicks him into the corner but gets knocked off the top for the elimination. We didn’t even get anything from the full New Day in the whole thing?

Mahal gets rid of Big E. as well and it’s Seth Rollins in at #18 to a nice reaction. Rollins monkey flips Cesaro out as at least they’re keeping the eliminations flowing. Mahal goes to dump Kofi but Woods is still on the floor, meaning Kofi can land on him instead of the floor. Big E. offers a plate of pancakes for the other foot and a nice case of hopping lets Kofi get back in, complete with Big E. and Woods launching him back in. Trouble in Paradise eliminates Mahal and it’s time to cover him in pancakes. With the celebration rolling, Almas hits Kofi with the hammerlock DDT to get rid of Kofi.

Woken Matt Hardy is in at #19 (King: “Oh brother.”) and he goes straight for Elias with the rams into the corner. Matt and Bray get together and eliminate Rusev, much to the fans’ annoyance. That’s it for the teamwork as they slug it out and then eliminate each other to really clear the ring a bit. John Cena is in at #20, giving us Balor, Elias, Almas, Nakamura, Rollins and Cena. The other five are waiting for Cena and stomp him down, because they’re rather smart. They don’t go for the elimination though, because their intelligence is short sighted.

Cena dumps Elias (because Cena always ruins Elias’ night) and the Hurricane is in at #21, much to Cena’s shock. The Hurri-chokeslam is easily countered into an AA to get rid of Hurricane, who is shocked as well. Aiden English is in at #22 but the fans would rather argue about Cena. Adam Cole, with bad ribs, is in at #23 and you know these fans are going to like him. Balor (hey he’s still in this) eliminates English and it’s Randy Orton in at #24. Cena shrugs off an RKO attempt so Almas takes it instead and gets thrown out as the amount of entrants stays at a nice pace.

Titus O’Neil is in at #25 but no one seems worried about him. At least they know their history. Titus does actually beat up Nakamura in the corner as Cena and Orton have their contractually obligated fight until Intercontinental Champion The Miz is in at #26. That means house can be cleaned, including the YES Kicks to Rollins and Cena. A Skull Crushing Finale keeps Cena down but Rollins superkicks Miz.

Rey Mysterio makes a surprise appearance at lucky #27, marking his first appearance with the company since the night after Wrestlemania XXX. The pace gets to pick up and Cole is eliminated off a headscissors. Miz eats a 619 and it’s Roman Reigns in at #28 to tick the fans off in a bad way. Almost everyone gets a right hand until it’s a showdown with Miz, who took Reigns’ Intercontinental Title on Raw earlier in the week.

Dolph Ziggler is in at #30 (Cole: “I thought he retired or something!” This was after Ziggler vacated the US Title and walked out without ever mentioning what he was doing. And now he’s right back, apparently saying that the US Title means nothing. Anyway the final group is Balor, Nakamura, Cena, Orton, Mysterio, Reigns, Goldust and Ziggler. Cena tries an AA on Ziggler, who flips out and lands on his leg, which probably should have counted as full on impact. Goldust scores with the snap powerslam but Ziggler easily puts him out with a superkick.

Some tuning up the band takes too long though and Ziggler is knocked to the apron so Balor can knock him out. They vacated the title to give Ziggler a two minute cameo. Well done indeed. We’re down to six and that’s a CRAZY deep field, with Nakamura being the least successful in WWE. Balor takes an AA and it’s a 619 to Reigns, followed by an RKO to Nakamura (Lawler: “COVER HIM! COVER HIM! Oh wait….”).

Reigns gets up with a Superman Punch to Orton for an elimination but it’s Mysterio with a double 619 to Reigns and Cena. Balor breaks up a springboard though and Mysterio is out to leave us with four. Everyone is down in a corner until it’s Cena vs. Nakamura and Reigns vs. Balor. Nakamura and Balor are knocked down so it’s a Reigns vs. Cena showdown but nothing happens before the other two are right back up. Nakamura’s running knee in the corner rocks Balor but he gets back in, only to get kicked square in the head.

Reigns is back up for a save this time and NOW we get Reigns vs. Cena for the big showdown. The slugout goes to Reigns but Balor gets up and starts firing off Sling Blades. Kinshasa is cut off with a running double stomp from Balor, only to have Cena pop up and throw Balor out to get us down to three. A Superman Punch puts Nakamura down but he’s right back up to kick Cena to the apron. Another knee sends Cena to the floor and we’re down to Nakamura vs. Reigns. I think you know who the fans are behind here.

They slug it out in the middle and it’s a Superman Punch to put Nakamura in trouble. Nakamura is sent to the apron but comes back with a triangle choke over the ropes. That’s rather stupid, though it’s also broken up with a powerbomb. The spear is cut off by a kick to the face and the middle rope knee to the face drops Reigns. Kinshasa gets blocked by a tackle to the face (called a spear) but the second attempt works just fine. Reigns is out on his feet and Nakamura tosses him out for the win at 1:05:29.

Rating: B-. This is one where you’re going to have to think about things for a bit. First and foremost, the winner is a fine choice. Nakamura hadn’t broken through yet and this is the kind of win that can help him do that (it didn’t, but it could have). Second, the last fifteen minutes or so with the final group was great stuff and full of drama as you could see anyone winning.

The problem is everything else, which isn’t terrible but it’s also not too great. The first part barely meant anything with just Balor being there from the beginning until the end. There were a few nice surprises and it doesn’t drag terribly or anything, but you really could skip about the first half hour and not miss much. It’s a completely watchable Rumble but it’s in the middle of the pack at best.

Post match Nakamura (or Shin as Cole keeps calling him because WWE likes to make Cole sound like an idiot) picks AJ Styles for Wrestlemania to really pop the crowd. Sounds awesome to me and for the most part, it was.

Next year’s Rumble is in Phoenix.

The bosses of the show trade bragging barbs. Watching a year later, I can’t believe how stupid these look now. WWE really thinks that we care about these stupid battling brand arguments. I have no idea why, but but that’s been their narrative for years. Stephanie says that no matter who wins the Women’s Royal Rumble, everyone will be surprised. That’s some nice foreshadowing.

We look at the KFC Colonel Sanders Rumble, with Ric Flair reenacting the 1992 Royal Rumble to win the whole thing. I still think this is some fever dream that they managed to record.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Jason Jordan/Seth Rollins

Jordan and Rollins are defending after winning the belts on Christmas night. It’s pretty clear that Jordan is filling in for the injured Dean Ambrose and that’s not a bad thing. Rollins and Cesaro start things off with Rolling taking over off a flying mare (you don’t see that one very often). It’s off to Sheamus but a quick Cesaro distraction prevents Jordan from coming in, meaning Rollins is driven back into the corner.

An enziguri gets Rollins a breather as the crowd is eerily silent. Cesaro breaks up the hot tag attempt to Jordan and sends him into the post, leaving Rollins to hit a suicide dive on both challengers. The medics are out checking on Jordan, though that might be making sure he doesn’t fall asleep. Cesaro grabs a chinlock, which is the last thing this match could possibly need. Rollins fights up and tries the springboard but gets clotheslined down by Cesaro.

A Demolition Decapitator and a double backbreaker give the Bar two each and Rollins is in big trouble. Sheamus misses a charge into the post though, giving Rollins a breather as Jordan is STILL down. Rollins gets the Blockbuster on Cesaro, followed by the Falcon Arrow for two. Super White Noise is broken up and Jordan is finally on the apron for a tag. He immediately grabs his head though and tags himself out. That’s fine with the Bar, as the spike White Noise gets the titles back at 12:50.

Rating: D. As you probably guessed, this was Jordan’s last “match”. I know he wasn’t the most thrilling guy in the world, but he was getting the hang of things until his neck just gave out on him and there was no coming back. At least he got a nice run and there’s a very real chance that he could get back in the ring one day. It’s not exactly fair to call the match bad….but it was really quite bad and the fans were just gone in a terrible way.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network.

We recap the Universal Title match. Brock Lesnar is a monster, two other monsters are challenging for his title, Braun Strowman is really strong and broke some stuff.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Lesnar is defending. Braun starts fast with running splashes in the corner and a running dropkick to Brock, followed by a knee to his head. Brock then UNLOADS on Strowman with right hands which look a lot like receipts from a former UFC Heavyweight Champion rather than working punches. Lesnar shouts something that sounds like SLOW DOWN as Kane gets back up. Brock grabs a chair which is knocked into his face, followed by a toss out to the floor.

Some shots with the steps put Lesnar and Kane down and it’s time for a pair of tables inside. With one set up in the corner, Strowman chokeslams Kane for two with Lesnar making the save. Three rolling German suplexes….don’t do much to Strowman, who powerslams Lesnar through a table for two. Kane shoulders Strowman through the other table in the corner but again, Strowman is right up. A German suplex sends Lesnar outside but he’s fine enough to hit an F5 to send Strowman through the announcers’ table.

With that not being enough, Lesnar turns the other announcers’ table onto Strowman, literally burying him. Another F5 sends Kane through the other announcers’ table, because we need three of them at ringside. Strowman is back up, because of course he is, and Lesnar isn’t sure what to do. Back in and Lesnar takes two powerslams, only to have Kane make the save with some chair shots to Strowman. Lesnar pops up, sends both of them into each other, and F5’s Kane onto the chair to retain at 11:00.

Rating: D. There were some good power spots in there but this match didn’t need to be on the card either. Lesnar won another match that didn’t do anything for him and then walked off with the title for two and a half months, which was the case for FAR too long. I get the idea of keeping Strowman warm but they’re taking way too long to get anywhere.

We recap the Women’s Royal Rumble. Stephanie McMahon announced that we needed one and everyone nodded along because that’s how WWE works.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals, Maria Menunos is guest ring announcer and Stephanie is on commentary. As she comes to the ring, the announcers are all over themselves to suck up to her, with lines like “she’s a trailblazer but would never admit it”. Alexa Bliss and Charlotte (reigning Women’s Champions) are sitting at ringside. Sasha Banks is in at #1 and pre-Man Becky Lynch is in at #2 for a feeling out process to start. Neither can grab a submission hold and it’s a double clothesline, allowing Sarah Logan to come in at #3 and pick the bones.

She goes after Becky first but stops to point at the sign, meaning Becky is staying in. A headbutt drops Banks so everyone stands around until it’s Mandy Rose in at #4. The near eliminations abound as Stephanie gets into full on “person having an unnatural conversation” mode with Corey, making her rather annoying in her own right. Lita is in at #5 (in a #timesup shirt) to really fire the fans up for the first time in awhile.

Sasha and Becky stare her down and we get the slugout, which is rather cool when you consider how much of an inspiration she and Trish Stratus were on the current generation. Stephanie talks about how she and Lita were close over the years….and actually mentions CHYNA, which I didn’t think was allowed. Well I guess it’s cool if you’re Stephanie. Mandy is sent to the apron and hits a knee to Lita, who eliminates her without much effort. Kairi Sane is in at #6 and it’s a double spear to Lynch and Banks.

The Insane Elbow hits Banks and there’s one to Becky as Tamina (all in white for some reason) is in at #7. Lita drops her with a DDT because Tamina isn’t very good, setting up Twists of Fate to Lynch and Banks. There’s the moonsault to both of them and Lita throws Tamina out. Becky gets rid of Lita a few seconds later and it’s Dana Brooke in at #8. She goes straight for Sane in the corner….and actually eliminates her in a pretty big upset. Torrie Wilson is in at #9 and we now have to pretend that she was anything more than eye candy because she wrestled fifteen years ago.

Logan dropkicks her down as a TORRIE WILSON chant begins. A backdrop and dropkick to the knee get rid of Dana and it’s Sonya Deville in at #10. That means a kick to the ribs to get rid of Torrie (yes she looked great, and that’s about the extent of her value here). Liv Morgan is in at #11 and we hear about how much she idolized Lita. That likely applies to almost everyone in the match, which is rather cool given that Lita was in the match.

Things settle down again and it’s Molly Holly in at #12 to a rather big reaction. She dumps Logan with ease and there’s the Molly Go Round to Banks. They both fall to the floor (not out) and it’s Lana in at #13. These people are just coming and going at this point with very little other than nostalgia holding things together. Lana takes Liv down with a rather impressive spear and it’s Michelle McCool in at #14.

The fans immediately chant for the Undertaker as Michelle dumps Sonya. Morgan is out as well and Michelle gets rid of Molly with ease. Lana gets back up and is dumped just as well. Becky and Sasha double team Michelle to little avail as Ruby Riott is in at #15. No one can get anywhere and it’s Vickie Guerrero (the obvious comedy spot) in at #16. A bunch of EXCUSE ME’s earn her an elimination and it’s Carmella in at #17, but Vickie blasts her with the Money in the Bank briefcase to leave her laying on the floor.

Natalya is in at #18 (Stephanie: “Here she comes.” Natalya gets “here she comes”?) but Carmella decks her on the floor before it’s time to start the strutting. The Bexploder puts her down though and everyone is on the mat for a breather. Kelly Kelly is in at #19 and opts for some kicks in the corner as Natalya eliminates Michelle.

It’s Naomi in at #20, giving us Sasha, Becky, Riott, Carmella, Natalya, Kelly Kelly and Naomi. A bunch of Rear Views clean house and a kick to the head drops Banks. Sasha gets sent outside (not out, again) but Becky doesn’t have the same luck as Riott gets rid of her. Jacqueline is in at #21 and goes after Kelly as very little is going on at the moment. Nia Jax is in at #22 and gets rid of Kelly and Jacqueline without much effort. Riott gets tossed as well so Naomi fires off kicks. Jax throws her onto the big pile but Naomi lands on the barricade.

As she tries to figure it out, the injured Ember Moon is in at #23 and slugs away with one arm. Naomi walks the barricade and gets to the timekeeper’s area where she steals Menunos’ chair to crawl over to the steps for the improbable save. Back in….and Nia dumps her with ease. With everyone else on the floor, Beth Phoenix is in at # 24 and it’s time for a showdown.

Beth avoids a charge in the corner but can’t get her up in the fireman’s carry. Another attempt works to a big reaction as Natalya gets back in. They can’t get rid of Nia as they knock her to the floor (enough already) instead. Natalya quickly turns on Beth and throws her out as Carmella comes back in. Having this many women on the floor is ridiculous as you can’t remember who is still in.

Asuka is in at #25 to strike away, setting up the big reunion fight with Ember. Moon is fine enough for a one armed Eclipse but Asuka throws her out a few seconds later. So much for that. Mickie James is in at #26 and grabs a neckbreaker on Natalya. A bunch of near eliminations go nowhere and it’s Nikki Bella in at lucky #27, to a strong pop because we live in a random and chaotic universe. There’s a springboard kick to the face to put Banks down and it’s a spear to Natalya. Nikki throws Carmella out but everyone jumps onto the superwoman known as Nikki until Brie Bella comes out of retirement to come in at #28.

That means it’s time for the YES chants and some horrible running knees. The Bellas get their big moment (because they haven’t had one in a few minutes) and Nia is knocked to the floor (say it with me: without being eliminated). Bayley is in at #29 and gets to clean house until Asuka kicks her in the head. Trish Stratus is in at #30, which is quite the moment, though it was always going to be her or Rousey. That gives us a final grouping of Banks, Natalya, Jax, Asuka, James, Nikki, Brie, Bayley and Trish.

After tackling Natalya, we get the Trish vs. Bellas showdown which I think only WWE believes matters. A double Stratusfaction drops the Bellas and it’s time for a real showdown with Trish vs. Mickie. The Stratusphere is blocked so Trish kicks her in the head for the elimination. Nia gets back in so the big beatdown is on with a couple of kicks sending her to the ropes. Everyone gets together for the elimination in a good moment. Sasha dumps Bayley in a bit of a stab in the back and it’s Natalya grabbing a Sharpshooter on Trish.

That’s broken up because it’s a worthless move here, allowing Trish to kick Natalya out to get us to five. Banks goes after Trish, who kicks her in the ribs and does Sasha’s dance (that works). That’s fine with Banks, who kicks Trish out but turns into Asuka. They decide to go for the Bellas but it winds up being all three going after Asuka in a smart move. Banks says she’s ready for Asuka and loads up the double knees in the corner, only to have the Bellas turn on her.

That leaves Asuka and the Bellas (plus probably fourteen women on the floor as you never can tell) with the former firing off kicks to both of them. Brie gets sent to the apron but Nikki cuts Asuka off with the Rack Attack 2.0. A forearm knocks Brie out though as the sisters fight again. Asuka hits the missile dropkick on Nikki but she’s right back with a kick to the face. They both wind up on the apron with Asuka kicking the leg out (barely) for the win at 58:57.

Rating: B-. I remember being confused about what to think of this one last year and that’s the case again here. The legends needed to be there to flesh out the match and while there were some other options (NXT), I can go with this for the sake of history. This was designed to be more of a history of women’s wrestling over the years and there’s nothing wrong with that. They did a great job of making me want to see who was next as it was a nice mixture of all those generations. Having the nice mixture worked well and the right person won, so it’s hard to complain all that much. Stephanie was fine, though rather unnecessary.

Post match Charlotte and Alexa get in the ring to hold up the titles….and here’s Ronda Rousey to a huge reaction because she’s a star that was rumored to be in Columbia for this show. We get the most awkward sign pointing of all time (there’s an art to it) but Asuka won’t shake her hand. A bunch of staring and then high fiving fans, plus a handshake with Stephanie ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. It wasn’t a very good show, but the two namesake matches delivered well enough and only the Universal Title match was really bad. The big story here was Ronda of course and that delivered (awkward pointing aside) so it’s hard to really call this anything but pretty good. The wrestling wasn’t great overall and, again, the show was way too long but the important stuff worked well and that’s how you get a nice show.

Ratings Comparison

Lucha House Party vs. TJP/Jack Gallagher/Drew Gulak

Original: C

Redo: C

Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson vs. Revival

Original: C

Redo: C

Bobby Roode vs. Mojo Rawley

Original: D

Redo: D+

Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: C+

Usos vs. Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Men’s Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: B-

Seth Rollins/Jason Jordan vs. The Bar

Original: C-

Redo: D

Brock Lesnar vs. Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Original: B-

Redo: D

Women’s Royal Rumble

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: C+

I don’t remember the last time I was that far off on so many matches. I mean….dang man.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/28/royal-rumble-2018-i-had-fun-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2018
Date: January 28, 2018
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Booker T.

The big night is finally here and for the first time ever we have two Royal Rumbles in one night. This time around we have a women’s version to go with the standard men’s version and that opens up the doors for a lot more surprise entrants. Of course it also opens the door for a lot more boring action if the last few Rumbles are any indication. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Drew Gulak/TJP/Jack Gallagher vs. Kalisto/Gran Metalik/Lince Dorado

Drew takes Kalisto down by the arm to start as the announcers talk about the upcoming 205 Live General Manager. That just earns a few chants from the crowd, which Gulak of course can’t stand. It’s off to Gallagher vs. Metalik with Gran working on the knee until Lince and TJP come in to complete each trio’s ring time.

The announcers discuss dabbing until the villains are all sent outside. The three masked men hit stereo moonsaults from the same turnbuckle (very cool) to the floor as we take a break. Back with TJP kicking Lince in the ribs and handing it off to Gulak, who drops Dorado’s partners off the apron. Now the announcers speculate on the next General Manager, which is much more focused than you would expect from these guys.

Jack cranks on Dorado’s leg as about half of the HUGE group of empty seats opposite the hard camera is filled in. But hey, at least we have a meaningless match going on an hour and a half before the rest show starts. Gallagher goes to the middle rope, pauses to listen to Gulak telling him not to jump, and then misses a dive anyway. The hot tag brings in Metalik for the rope walk into the dropkick to put Gulak down. The rope walk elbow works just as well for two as everything breaks down. Stereo dives take Gallagher and Gulak down, leaving the Salida Del Sol to finish TJP at 13:13.

Rating: C. Take any match between some combination of these guys that you might have seen on 205 Live and add five minutes to get this match. I’m not sure how that’s supposed to entice me to watch a pay per view but I’m sure WWE is smarter than I am on that front. Nothing special here, outside of that triple moonsault that is. This would have been fine as the only dark match but with two more, it could have been cut.

Kickoff Show: Revival vs. Anderson and Gallows

Rematch from Monday where Anderson and Gallows won, followed by the Revival getting destroyed by DX and Scott Hall. The Brian Pillman style trunks don’t really suit Revival but anything is better than Monday. Dawson gets sent outside to start for a breather before it’s Gallows tossing both of them around. Back from a break with Dawson working on Anderson’s knee with a string of elbow drops.

Wilder comes in to crank the knee even more but Anderson keeps kicking him away. Therefore, in a good tag team idea, Revival double teams him to keep the advantage. Now why is that so hard to figure out? Of course the hot tag goes through a few seconds later but at least they were trying. Everything breaks down and Gallows scores with a splash for two. Everything breaks down and the Magic Killer is broken up. Dawson sidesteps a charge to post Gallows and Dash’s chop block is good for the pin on Anderson at 9:11.

Rating: C. Well, it was better than Monday. I’m glad Revival won and now of course we’re likely to have the rubber match tomorrow night because WWE loves their trilogies. The leg stuff was fine here but the break in the middle didn’t do it many favors. At least the right team won though and that helps a lot.

Kickoff Show: Bobby Roode vs. ???

Roode is defending in an Open Challenge answered by….Mojo Rawley. The fans think Mojo sucks as he sends Roode into the corner and actually hammers him down as we take a break. Back with Mojo driving knees in the corner and grabbing a chinlock. Roode fights up and hits a running forearm, followed by a neckbreaker for two. There’s the Blockbuster but the Glorious DDT is countered into a spinebuster. Back up and another Glorious DDT is countered into a backdrop but the running punch is blocked. Instead it’s a regular DDT to retain the title at 7:37.

Rating: D. This could have been on any house show and that’s not good as the Kickoff Show main event. Roode doesn’t have a ton of challengers and a lot of that is due to how so few people were treated as important for the sake of Jinder Mahal. They need some kind of a feud going here and Rawley isn’t the kind of person to do that.

The opening video doesn’t say much out of the ordinary but it does a very good job of setting up the big matches while treating the Rumble win as a big deal. It’s very nice that they gave the match some shine for once because they haven’t exactly treated it like it matters up to this point.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn

AJ is defending in a handicap match. The challengers do have to tag and it’s Sami starting for the team. No contact and it’s off to Owens, who hangs on the ropes instead of going after the champ. Sami is already back in as there’s almost no contact in the first minute and a half. AJ wrestles Sami down but it’s already back to Owens, who takes AJ down, runs to the floor and tags Sami back in.

That means a drop down into a dropkick for Zayn as Byron and Graves have ANOTHER stupid argument that completely ignores the match. There’s a backdrop for two on AJ as the fans aren’t sure who to cheer for. Owens comes back in and unloads with right hands before sending AJ into the barricade. Almost all challengers so far. Owens gets in a double stomp and brings AJ into the corner for more right hands. An electric chair faceplant is good for two more and it’s off to the chinlock.

AJ fights up again and gets in a shot to Owens’ ankle, which was banged up on Smackdown in the first place. The Pele is enough to bring Sami back in but the Helluva Kick is blocked with a raised boot. Everything breaks down and Owens monkey flips Styles, who hurricanranas Zayn to the floor instead of crashing to the mat. The Calf Crusher has Owens ready to tap until Sami dives back in for the save.

Owens kicks AJ in the back of the head to knock him into the Blue Thunder Bomb, which of course only gets two (once in a lifetime you see). Another kick to the head puts Sami down this time and the springboard 450 is good for another near fall. They slug it out with AJ throwing Sami to the floor, only to eat a superkick from Owens. The Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into a rollup though and AJ retains (pinning the illegal man) at 16:08.

Rating: B. About what was expected here as there’s only so much you can do when the participants have been treated as background characters. I’m glad Bryan and Shane were left out but the match has been booked to make them the stars, meaning this is likely to continue. Some good action here, but it wasn’t the most thrilling match in the world.

Wrestlemania XXXIV ad.

Sami and Kevin ask Shane what he’s going to do. They can’t have another referee screw Owens out of another title. Shane says that yep, he did indeed see that. Nothing else is said.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Shelton Benjamin/Chad Gable

The Usos are defending and this is 2/3 falls after Gable pinned the wrong Uso a few weeks back. In other words, the same ending as the previous match, again showing the limited creative abilities of WWE. Gable can’t hit a German suplex on Jimmy to start so it’s some chops to the chest in the corner. A distraction lets Chad get in a chop block though and Jimmy is in trouble early on.

Benjamin drives knees into the bad knee as the challengers start cutting the ring off for an old NWA feel. Shelton stops to yell at the crowd though and it’s an enziguri to cut him off. The hot tag brings in Jey, who dives through the ropes to take out both challengers in a row. Back in and Gable gets two off a tiger suplex (I haven’t seen that one in years), followed by a powerbomb to send Jey into Jimmy.

Pay Dirt gives Shelton two and the bug eyed look on the kickout is funnier than it should be. It’s back to Gable who moonsaults onto both champions on the floor but Gable can’t pin the illegal Uso. That means a superkick into the Superfly Splash for two in a surprise near fall. The double Superfly Splash is broken up so Gable loads up Rolling Chaos Theory.

That’s broken up as well and four straight superkicks end Gable at 12:21. Gable and Benjamin beat the heck out of both champs to start the second fall. A rolling Liger Kick hits Jey and Chad goes up, leaving Shelton to get small packaged to retain the titles in two straight falls at 13:47.

Rating: B-. That was kind of a surprising ending but it’s not like it really matters. The Bludgeon Brothers (who have kind of disappeared in recent weeks) are pretty clearly the next challengers and it should be a fun match when we get to it. I’m not sure what happens to Benjamin and Gable at this point but they’ve proven to be a good team who deserve more time.

Rumble by the Numbers video.

Jerry Lawler joins commentary for the Rumble.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals this year. Rusev is #1 (with Aiden English singing him to the ring) and Finn Balor (in red here) is in at #2 to a very strong reaction. Balor gets sent to the apron early on but gets back in without too much effort. Rhyno is in at #3 and gets in a showdown with Rusev that doesn’t go much of anywhere. Balor is back up and it’s Baron Corbin in at #4 to quickly eliminate Rhyno.

Finn is right behind Corbin though and gets rid of him as well, sending Corbin into a rage. That means Balor is pulled to the floor for a whip into the barricade (shoulder first) and End of Days on the floor to Rusev. Heath Slater is in at #5 and gets run over on the ramp. Everyone is down and it’s Elias in at #6, playing the guitar (and kicking Slater in the head) on the way to the ring.

It’s time for a song about spitting in the Rocky statue’s face but the countdown clock cuts him off. NXT Champion Andrade Cien Almas is in at #7 (running Slater over again as we have a running joke) and a running elbow puts Elias into the corner. The running knees rock Elias again but the hammerlock DDT is broken up. A hard clothesline drops Almas and it’s Bray Wyatt in at #8.

Naturally Slater gets laid out again and there’s a release Rock Bottom to Elias. Balor comes back in to break up Sister Abigail (again, thank goodness). Big E. is in at #9 and gives Slater some pancakes instead of beating him up. Bray is waiting on him with Cole saying Bray has been so dominating since entering. IT’S BEEN LIKE TWO MINUTES!

Rusev is back in but can’t get rid of Almas. Tye Dillinger is in at #10 (again), giving us Balor, Rusev, Slater (still not in the ring), Elias, Almas, Wyatt, Big E. and Dillinger. Actually hang on a second as we cut to the back to see Dillinger getting beaten down by Owens and Zayn. Sami is taking his place and continues the tradition by jumping Slater.

Sheamus is in at #11 and throws Slater in….who immediately eliminates Sheamus (on his BIRTHDAY). Bray dumps Slater almost immediately and it’s Xavier Woods in at #12. Woods and Big E. double team Sami and a wheelbarrow slam into a splash hits Elias. Rusev can’t get rid of Big E. and it’s Apollo Crews in at #13. Apollo gets in a good looking jumping enziguri on Bray as Byron is now anti-Zayn as he tries to show a personality.

Balor escapes Sister Abigail and it’s Shinsuke Nakamura in at #14. Sami is waiting on him in a Takeover: Dallas flashback as the fans sing Nakamura’s song. There are WAY too many people in there and some eliminations are needed. Nakamura fires off some kicks and it’s Good Vibrations for Elias. The running knee in the corner gets rid of Sami and Cesaro is in at #15, giving us Balor, Rusev, Elias, Almas, Wyatt, Big E., Woods, Crews, Nakamura and Cesaro.

Uppercuts abound without much happening and it’s Kofi Kingston in at #16 to put New Day at full strength. Cesaro cuts him off with an uppercut but Crews gorilla presses Cesaro….to the apron at least but he gets back in. Instead a shot to the back gets rid of Crews to thin the ring out a bit. Jinder Mahal is in at #17 and goes after Woods, who dropkicks him into the corner. Woods is dumped a few seconds later though and Mahal gets rid of Big E. as well.

Seth Rollins is in at #18 (now with flames on his tights) and gets rid of Cesaro in short order. Mahal sends Kofi over the top but he lands on Xavier….and then on a plate of pancakes. Big E. and Woods launch him from the floor over the ropes and over Mahal, who gets caught with Trouble in Paradise for the elimination. As the rest of New Day throws pancakes at Mahal, Almas hits the hammerlock DDT and eliminates Kofi in a pretty big upset.

Matt Hardy is in at #19 for a standoff with Bray, which is broken up by Rusev. Bray and Matt actually start working together and get rid of Rusev (the fans are NOT pleased) before fighting each other. They eliminate each other and it’s John Cena at #20, giving us Balor, Elias, Almas, Nakamura, Rollins and Cena.

Everyone jumps Cena at the same time in a smart move but then let him up, allowing him to AA Elias out. The Hurricane of all people is in at #22 (which Cole calls a superhero persona which was a huge hit with kids years ago) and tries a chokeslam but gets tossed out by Cena. Hurricane lands on the pancakes, nearly slips, and then does his pose over and over again on the way to the back. Aiden English is in at #22 and goes after Rollins before switching to Balor.

Adam Cole (with taped ribs) from NXT is in at #23 to a very nice reaction. Balor kicks English off the ropes for an elimination and it’s Randy Orton in at #24. An RKO drops Almas and there he goes after a strong performance. Things settle down a bit and it’s Titus O’Neil in at #25. Cole gets sent to the apron but slides back in, leaving Titus to chop Nakamura in the corner. Miz is in at #26 and starts fast with the YES Kicks, followed by a Skull Crushing Finale on Cena.

Lucky #27 is the returning Rey Mysterio to get rid of Cole in a hurry. The Miz takes 619 and it’s Roman Reigns in at #28. You can feel the pain from the booing. Reigns goes after Miz and hits the jumping clothesline, followed by the clotheslines in the corner. Titus gets eliminated but the Miztourage saves Miz from the same fate. Rollins Curb Stomps Miz but gets into a showdown with Reigns. A DoubleBomb gets rid of Miz but Reigns turns on Rollins to get rid of him as well.

Goldust is in at #29 and hurts himself headbutting Reigns. Cena gets beaten up as well and it’s Dolph Ziggler (POP) in at #30, giving us a final group of Balor, Nakamura, Cena, Orton, Mysterio, Reigns, Goldust and Ziggler. Goldust is out in a hurry and Balor kicks Ziggler out, making him one of the most inconsequential #30s in recent memory. Rey, Cena and Orton get together in one corner, Nakamura and Balor are in another and Reigns is on his own (how appropriate).

Balor takes a quick AA followed by the 619 to Reigns. There’s an RKO to Nakamura but Cena blocks another attempt. A Superman Punch lets Reigns get rid of Orton and a double 619 hits Reigns and Cena (with Cena loudly talking to Reigns while they wait). Balor throws Mysterio out to get us down to four meaning everyone goes to a corner.

We get the big staredown as the fans are behind Nakamura. Cena throws a You Can’t See Me at Balor and hammers on Nakamura while Reigns beats on Balor. That gives us the big showdown as the fans think they both suck. No one throws a punch as Balor and Nakamura get back up, giving us a much better received showdown. The running knees in the corner put Balor on the apron but he kicks a charging Nakamura in the head. Another kick to the head rocks Balor but he scores with a basement dropkick.

Reigns and Cena are back up again with Cena charging into a Samoa drop. The Superman Punch is countered with a ProtoBomb but the Shuffle is broken up with a Sling Blade. Balor hits the shotgun dropkick on Reigns but Nakamura kicks Balor in the face. Balor’s standing double stomp cuts off Kinshasa and Cena tosses Balor to get us down to three. Reigns slips out of an AA and hits the Superman Punch on Cena. The spear is cut off by the AA and Nakamura puts Cena on the apron.

A running kick to the face gets rid of Cena and we’re down to Nakamura vs. Reigns. That means COME ON and Reigns does so with a Superman Punch. Reigns sends him to the apron but gets kicked in the head but Nakamura grabs a hanging triangle over the apron. A powerbomb brings Nakamura back in and they’re both down again.

It’s Reigns up first but the spear is cut off with a kick to the face. A middle rope knee to the face drops Reigns but Kinshasa is hit with a spear to put them both down again. Nakamura grabs the ropes to hang on and another running knee drops Roman, setting up the elimination to give Nakamura the win at 65:32.

Rating: A. Best Rumble in years, though that’s not exactly saying much. The important thing here was they went with a popular name to win the Rumble, which has been lacking in recent years. Nakamura winning really surprised me as I never thought they would actually do it but I’ll take what I can get.

They laid the match out nicely here as things took a little time to get going but the final ten to fifteen minutes were excellent with the final six all being solid options. I wasn’t dreading this one at all and it made the match that much better. This was a lot of fun and the way the Rumble should go, with one of the best endings in a long time. Great match.

The Smackdown bosses are celebrating in the back when Stephanie McMahon and Kurt Angle come in to say Raw will win later. Daniel and Shane (buddies again) don’t seem to care.

Post match Nakamura is asked who he wants to face at Wrestlemania. Fans: “PLEASE SAY STYLES!” Nakamura: “AJ STYLES!”

There was a Royal Rumble to determine the next Colonel Sanders with Ric Flair winning. He has the wrinkles for it.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Jason Jordan/Seth Rollins

Rollins and Jordan are defending with Seth and Sheamus starting things off. Seth gets driven into the corner with Cesaro offering a distraction to keep Jordan away from interfering. Jordan is ready for the hot tag but Cesaro pulls him down (I thought that was the heel turn) and posts him into near unconsciousness. Back in and Sheamus’ top rope clothesline gets two as the double beatdown is on, made especially worse by Seth’s long Rumble run.

Seth finally sends Sheamus into the post to get it back to even, followed by a Sling Blade and Blockbuster. Sheamus comes back in for the save but Rollins drops both of them for a double frog splash. As Seth gets up, Jordan is STILL sitting on the steps, leaving Sheamus to hit the Brogue Kick. The super White Noise gives us new champions at 13:03. Jordan was never in the match.

Rating: C-. This was an angle instead of a match and there’s nothing wrong with that. For some reason we seem to be waiting on Jordan vs. Rollins at Wrestlemania, even though that doesn’t quite blow my skirt up. The match was stuck in the cool down spot after the great Rumble and that was the right spot for it.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Basically you have three monsters fighting each other and breaking things to hurt each other, meaning it’s time to get violent.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Brock is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Strowman wastes no time in cleaning house, including a hard knee to Brock’s head. That’s fine with Brock who starts throwing punches, only to have Kane score with a chokeslam. Brock grabs a chair but Braun punches it away and drops everyone.

Shots with the steps clean house and it’s time for a pair of tables. Strowman chokeslams Kane for two with Brock making the save and it’s time for Suplex City. Braun pops up like a daisy and powerslams Brock through a table with Kane making the save this time. Kane is tossed away again (it’s almost like he’s completely unnecessary in this match until the ending) and it’s time for the announcers’ table.

Braun takes too long though and it’s an F5 to drive him through instead. Brock turns the other table over Braun (Corey: “I’m about to throw this German guy in front of me!”) and F5’s Kane through another. Braun gets up again and sends Brock into the steps, followed by the powerslam. Kane makes the save and sends Braun outside, setting up an F5 onto the chair to retain Brock’s title at 10:12.

Rating: B-. Well duh. The world knows that Braun is ready to be World Champion and should have been like six months ago but Vince McMahon and seemingly Vince McMahon alone wants to see Reigns take the title from Brock. Again, as has been the case many, many times: none of this is important because we’re just sitting around waiting on Reigns to take the title like we’ve been waiting for for nearly a year now. After that, I have no idea where they go and I’m not sure WWE does either. This was fun, but exactly as expected.

Trailer for Andre the Giant’s HBO documentary.

We get a video on the women’s Royal Rumble with a focus on the Revolution (and Stephanie of course) with everyone talking about how important this is.

Maria Menunos is guest ring announcer and Stephanie McMahon is guest commentator, with Cole reading off her resume (and saying Stephanie will tell you about her trailblazing). Alexa Bliss and Charlotte come out to watch at ringside.

Women’s Royal Rumble

Sasha Banks (in Wonder Woman gear) is in at #1 and Becky Lynch is in at #2 to give us a good start. Becky blocks an early elimination attempt and we talk about how nervous Stephanie is. The Bank Statement is broken up and it’s a double clothesline as Sarah Logan is in at #3. Logan clotheslines Becky down but Sasha makes a questionable save. Becky gets stomped down in the corner and it’s Mandy Rose in at #4. Mandy can’t get rid of Sasha and it’s LITA in at #5.

Sasha and Becky aren’t sure what to do so they opt with kicking her in the stomach. Mandy jumps Lita from behind and gets placed on the apron, followed by a hard shot for the first elimination. Kairi Sane is in at #6 and chops Lita into the corner as Cole talks about her “yacht persona”. She’s not Ashley Remington (bet you didn’t think I knew that one) because SHE’S A FREAKING PIRATE! Sane kicks Sasha down and drops the Insane Elbow, followed by another to Becky as Tamina is in at #7.

Lita starts hitting the Twists of Fate and hits a double moonsault onto Sasha and Becky (more like her falling backwards instead of any kind of jump but give her a break). That means the YOU STILL GOT IT chant before she eliminates Tamina, only to get dumped by Becky. That’s all this needed to be from Lita and it worked to perfection. Dana Brooke is in at #8 and actually dumps Kairi before stomping on Sasha in the corner.

Torrie Wilson is in at #9 (oh give me a break) and it’s time to prove why she wasn’t a wrestler. Logan dropkicks her down but Torrie pops up and eliminates Dana. Sonya Deville is in at #10, giving us Banks, Lynch, Logan, Wilson and Deville. Sonya starts firing off knees and gets rid of Torrie (thank goodness). Liv Morgan is in at #11 so the Squad can start getting together. No one is tossed though and it’s Molly Holly in at #12.

Molly gets rid of Logan and hits the Molly Go Round on Sasha. Lana is in at #13 and is immediately taken down by Morgan and Deville. She actually gets fired up and slaps her way to freedom as Michelle McCool is in at #14. That means an UNDERTAKER chant as she gets rid of Logan, Morgan and Holly. Sasha and Becky are down on the floor (not eliminated) as Michelle gets rid of Lana as well. With Michelle alone, Becky and Sasha get back in and it’s Ruby Riott at #15, giving us Michelle, Becky, Sasha and Ruby.

Vickie Guerrero is in at #16 and shouts EXCUSE ME over and over but everyone stares her down. She tries to bail and is tossed with ease (I guessed that as a comedy spot and it’s as perfect as I thought it would be). Carmella is in at #17 but Vickie takes the Money in the Bank briefcase to knock her silly. Natalya is in at #18 and throws her gear on Carmella, who pulls Natalya off the apron. That’s enough for Carmella to get in for some superkicks and it’s Kelly Kelly in at #19. Kelly fends off an early elimination as Natalya gets rid of McCool.

Naomi is in at #20, giving us Banks, Lynch, Riott, Carmella, Natalya, Kelly and Naomi at the moment. Becky goes up for some reason and gets dumped by Riott. Jacqueline is in at #21 and goes after Kelly. Nia Jax is in at #22, meaning it’s time to clear the ring. Jacqueline is out first, followed by Kelly with ease. Natalya is sent outside (through the ropes), leaving Nia to press Riott onto the top turnbuckle and then out to the floor. Naomi goes after Nia’s legs but tries a hurricanrana.

Nia knocks her off the apron but the pile catches her, allowing Naomi to land on the barricade. NXT Women’s Champion (with a bad arm) is in at #23 with a springboard kick to Nia’s face. Nia sends her flying as Naomi is walking across the barricade to steal Maria’s chair on wheels. She then crawls across the floor using her hands and the wheels on the chair….only to have Nia catch her coming back in and toss her out. I smiled at the irony. Beth Phoenix is in at #24 and this could be a lot of fun.

Phoenix is a lot closer to Nia’s size than I expected and manages a fireman’s carry but can’t eliminate Nia. Natalya’s help doesn’t work very well as they knock Nia through the ropes. That means a hug and of course Natalya turns on her and gets rid of Beth. Carmella (never eliminated) comes back in to jump Natalya from behind….and it’s Asuka at #25. There’s the hip attack to Carmella and it’s time for the showdown with Ember Moon.

Ember actually hits a one armed Eclipse but Asuka goes after the bad arm and gets rid of her. Sasha (also never eliminated) gets back in and it’s Mickie James in at #26. That goes nowhere and it’s Nikki Bella getting lucky #27 (well duh). That means the JOHN CENA SUCKS song but Carmella takes Nikki into the corner for the Staten Island Shuffle (not the Moon Walk Stephanie). Nikki powers her up though and a neck snap across the top rope gets rid of Carmella.

Brie Bella is in at #28 to save her sister from a big beatdown. The Bellas get their big moment (their latest one for those of you who have lost track) and knock Nia off the apron. A double suplex puts Natalya down and it’s Bayley in at #29. Asuka kicks Bayley in the head in short order but can’t get rid of her. It’s Trish Stratus in at #30 (not exactly shocking and that’s not a bad thing) to give us a final group of Sasha, Natalya, Nia, Asuka, Mickie, Nikki, Brie, Bayley and Trish.

Stratus gets to clean house and hits a double Stratusfaction before getting into a showdown with Mickie. James misses a charge and gets tossed, meaning it’s time for everyone to go after Nia. She shrugs them all off but the Bellas choke her on the ropes, allowing everyone else to join in and get rid of Nia. Sasha of course turns on Bayley for the elimination and we’re down to six.

Natalya puts Trish in the Sharpshooter for some reason and is broken up just as quickly. The Chick Kick eliminates Natalya but Trish mocks Sasha’s Boss pose, meaning the Stratusfaction is broken up to get rid of Stratus. Sasha turns around to meet Asuka but they decide to get rid of the Bellas….for all of three seconds until Sasha decks Asuka from behind. Sasha calls the Bellas off so she can beat on Asuka in the corner but the Twins dump her out as she tries the double knees.

So we’re down to the Bellas and Asuka and it’s time for the YES Kicks to both Twins (there’s a joke there that I’m not touching). Brie gets sent to the apron but Nikki decks Asuka, followed by the Rack Attack 2.0. Nikki decks Brie to get rid of her though and it’s down to two. Asuka is on the apron and hits a missile dropkick but Nikki’s spinning middle rope kick catches her in the face. Nikki puts her on the apron for the big forearm….which doesn’t end it. Instead Asuka grabs a headscissors to put Nikki on the apron but Asuka kicks kicks her in the leg for the elimination to win at 58:47.

Rating: B. I know a lot of people are going to be annoyed about the amount of legends (and the amount of botches) in there but my goodness what else were you expecting? The women’s division is about twenty people deep and I’d rather have people like McCool, Lita and Trish in there to give us either a good performance or appearances from people who are legitimate trailblazers (not McCool obviously but she did quite well). I was surprised by the lack of NXT names but what we got was fine, save for the Iconic Duo still not appearing.

The match itself was fine, albeit a bit predictable. You knew Asuka was the heavy favorite and really, it’s not like there were many other solid options. Aside from Jax, who really else was there? Banks or Lynch? Well maybe, but Asuka getting the title needs to be a big deal and one of those two can take the other title. Either way…..uh, back in a minute.

Oh and Stephanie’s commentary was annoying but acceptable. She didn’t need to be there and added nothing at all but she could have been worse. Sounded very much like a fan who wasn’t the most polished but it was fine.

Overall Rating: A-. I loved the heck out of this show as they made the Rumbles FUN. That’s been sorely, sorely lacking in recent years and they made up for it tonight. The Rumbles are interesting by definition but above all else, these matches were a good time as I kept waiting to see who was coming out next. I was actually worried about Reigns and Nikki winning so well done on some false drama. This did everything it needed to do, including setting up a major Wrestlemania match. I had a great time with this show and that’s what the Rumble is supposed to be. Well done all around and a great show.

Results

AJ Styles b. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens – Rollup to Owens

Usos b. Chad Gable/Jason Jordan – Small package to Benjamin

Shinsuke Nakamura won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Roman Reigns

The Bar b. Seth Rollins/Jason Jordan – Super White Noise to Rollins

Brock Lesnar b. Kane and Braun Strowman – F5 to Kane

Asuka won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Nikki Bella

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

It’s finally arrived. After what felt like a very long wait, we are ready to get on the Road to Wrestlemania. That means starting things off in Houston with the Royal Rumble, which feels both wide open and pretty clear about the winners. There are some odds on favorites but both feel like they are favored due to default more than anything else. I’m holding out hope for a surprise, but that hope might be false. Let’s get to it.

Shorty G. vs. Sheamus

We’ve waited for the better part of a year for Sheamus to come back and this is what he gets to do: make fun of someone for being short. Words can’t express how much I can’t stand this horrible gimmick for Gable, who deserves so much better (anyone would). The whole idea is built off one joke that probably only Vince McMahon himself finds funny, but Gable does seem willing to try and make it work.

That being said, Sheamus isn’t losing his first match back so Gable will try hard (as always) but still lose in the end. WWE does not see anything in Gable and while I can understand what they see in Sheamus, I can’t get my head around how they’ve set this up. I really hope this winds up on the Kickoff Show because it doesn’t feel like a match that needs to be on the main show at all.

SmackDown World Title: The Fiend(c) vs. Daniel Bryan

This is a strap match, which is kind of a weird choice for a gimmick. It fits their story well enough, but a cage match would make a lot more sense. I’m not sure what the point is in tying them together and whipping each other, as Fiend can survive a lot worse than pain. Bryan will be able to deliver some good visuals by letting out his aggression, but it still feels like an odd choice.

Of course I’m going with the Fiend here as there’s no logical reason to expect him to lose in this spot. Fiend seems destined to defend the title at WrestleMania in Tampa so winning here seems obvious. I’m not sure what Bryan is going to do next but he can take a few weeks off and come back to set up his WrestleMania program. Fiend wins here, after a pretty brutal match.

United States Title: Andrade(c) vs. Humberto Carrillo

They set this one up on Monday Night Raw and that’s not the biggest surprise in the world. Andrade took Carrillo out a few weeks ago and now it’s time to get revenge and the title. The fact that Andrade tried to take out Rey Mysterio made it even worse, but it’s nice to see two younger guys getting a spot like this.

I’ll take Andrade to retain, as he seems primed for a serious run for the title. Carrillo is someone who makes sense on paper but hasn’t exactly clicked with the audience yet. Someone with his skills is going to be around for a long time though and they should have a good match, but it isn’t going to include a title change. Andrade is too hot at the moment and Carrillo isn’t ready.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Asuka

This is the match that I’ve been looking forward to more than anything else on the roster. It was set up last year when Asuka made Lynch tap, which set her forward on her path to winning the Royal Rumble later in the night and then winning the Women’s Titles at WrestleMania 35. The loss is still in Lynch’s head though and that is driving her to want to face Asuka again.

I think Lynch wins here, but it’s after a war. Lynch is going into WrestleMania 36 for a heck of a showdown with someone (who we’ll find out tonight as well) and having her beat Asuka on the way there would be a great way to start. This could be an outstanding match and I could see an upset being possible, but the champ retains here, as she should.

Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin

This feud is still going and I’m really not sure I get why. Well ok I get why from WWE’s perspective, but the fans are the ones getting stuck with this boring story as WWE continues to try to make us care about Corbin. It’s Falls Count Anywhere so they can brawl around the stadium, which is a good bit better than trying to imagine them having another regular match.

Corbin wins here and, assuming Reigns can win the Royal Rumble, we get ANOTHER match out of them for the title shot in February. It’s the same idea that they had with Lynch last year and since WWE sees their wrestlers as the same all around, Corbin will win here, likely with the help of all of his cronies. I really don’t want to watch this but the faster we get done with this match, the faster both of them can get on to ANYTHING else.

SmackDown Women’s Title: Bayley(c) vs. Lacey Evans

I’m curious about this one as it could go either way. Bayley has been Women’s Champion for a good while now and WWE seems to like what they have with her during the heel run, but at the same time, Evans is the kind of person they have been trying to push for years now. This really could go either way and that’s a very nice feeling to have.

I’ll play it safe and pick Bayley to win, though other than Sasha Banks, I’m not sure who in the world she’s supposed to face at WrestleMania. The SmackDown women’s division isn’t exactly strong at the minute and Bayley could use a fresh challenge. I’m not exactly confident in this one and Evans could very easily walk away with the title, but I’ll take Bayley to retain.

Women’s Royal Rumble

This is your wide open Rumble as there are only five entrants announced as we come into the show. Out of those five, the only one who has a realistic chance to win is Charlotte, and I’m only kind of believing she could win. This is going to require some mixture of returning stars, NXT names and legends, which leaves the whole thing wide open.

I’m going with Shayna Baszler to debut and win, though I’m holding out hope for a Ronda Rousey return. Lynch vs. Rousey is the dream match that WWE would want at WrestleMania and one of the only logical ways they could go. Baszler is the other option and I’m hoping that’s the way they go, as she has certainly earned the chance. Then again the Survivor Series main event was kind of horrible and I don’t really need to see Baszler vs. Lynch again. Either way, Baszler wins here, save for Rousey returning.

Men’s Royal Rumble

I’m completely lost on this one. Brock Lesnar is starting the match at #1 and the question is who, if anyone, throws him out. There are a ton of wrestlers who are already announced for the match who could take him out, plus the possibility of Cain Velasquez returning (take me now) or a surprise Edge return (maybe but I’ll believe it when I see it). Then again there’s one name that seems to be a strong favorite.

As much as I don’t want to see it, I’ll take Reigns to win here so we can have his latest coronation at WrestleMania. I’m not sure why I’d want to see that, but Reigns vs. Fiend is the most likely choice they can have. Hopefully we get some nice surprises or that I’m completely wrong, as there are probably a dozen people who could get a rocket push out of this thing. They won’t, but they could and that gives me some nice false hope.

Overall Thoughts

The more I think about the two Rumble matches, the more confused I am. That’s the best thing that you can have happen, but I’m scared that we’ll get the easy way out and that’s the most annoying possibility. This year’s matches do feel wide open so maybe we can get a better show than last year. Then again, if it’s over six and a half hours counting the Kickoff Show, it isn’t going to matter how good things are.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Worlds Collide
Date: January 25, 2020
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Nigel McGuinness

It’s a big night in Texas, and not just because I finally remembered that the show isn’t called When Worlds Collide. This is NXT vs. NXT UK and the card is actually stacked, with a bunch of matches that could be awesome. If they live up to the hype, it’s a show of the year contender. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Mia Yim vs. Kay Lee Ray

Non-title. Mia knocks her into the corner to start and hits a Cannonball for two. Ray gets chopped against the ropes but Mia takes her down by the leg and gets two off a kick to the head. A faceplant gives Ray her own two and the chinlock goes on. Mia fights up and chops her way out of the corner so Ray superkicks her for two. The Swanton misses though and Yim scores with her own superkick.

The springboard DDT gives Yim two more and Ray gets hit with a suicide dive. Ray is right back up with a top rope flip dive of her own and they’re both down on the floor. Back in and Code Blue gets two but Ray is right back with Eat Defeat for her own near fall. It’s Yim’s turn now and a Batista Bomb give her two more. A Canadian Destroyer is good for the same but they go to a series of rollups. Yim gets two more but gets reversed, with Ray grabbing the rope for the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C+. It was good action and a fine finish, though I still can’t bring myself to care about Yim. She just isn’t interesting and there is nothing that she can do to fix that. Maybe she’ll catch fire later on but so far it has been a lot of dull stuff from here where they push her well but nothing clicks. Ray is better, though I’m still waiting on her to step up to another level.

The opening video features narration by Winston Churchill, talking about how we will fight everywhere over video of Imperium and the Undisputed Era. The rest of the card gets some attention as well, but the eight man tag is the focal point, as it should be.

The announcers welcome us to the show.

Finn Balor vs. Ilja Dragunov

Dragunov comes out to some near silence. Balor grabs a headlock to start and takes Dragunov down, only to get reversed with a headscissors. Dragunov starts slugging away but gets sent outside for a baseball slide through the ropes. Back in and Dragunov knocks him down, setting up a backsplash for two. The armbar is broken up as Balor makes the rope but he misses his apron enziguri.

Balor bails to the floor so Dragunov hits a crossbody from the apron. A top rope ax handle misses though and Balor stomps away, setting up an elbow for two back inside. Balor stomps away in the corner and the fans are VERY pleased. A running chop gets two and we hit the chinlock to keep Dragunov down. 1916 is countered into a suplex though and Dragunov hits a running knee in the corner.

Dragunov hits a bunch of knees to the chest and a big one to the face gets two. Balor is one step ahead of him though and hits the jumping double stomp to the ribs. They slug it out until Dragunov hits an enziguri. The Pele is caught but Balor is back with a Nightmare on Helm Street.

The Sling Blade looks to set up the John Woo dropkick but Dragunov grabs a bridging German suplex for two more. Dragunov’s discus lariat puts Balor on the floor for another crossbody. Back in and Balor is draped over the ropes for a missile dropkick to the side of the head. Balor’s nose is busted but he’s fine enough to get his knees up to block a backsplash. The John Woo dropkick sets up the Coup de Grace into the 1916 for the pin at 13:50.

Rating: B. The best sign of the match is that they overcame an apathetic crowd to start. The fans did not care about Dragunov and were cheering Balor throughout, but the important part here is that they got the fans caring. Dragunov isn’t ready to defeat someone like Balor so the loss isn’t a bad thing, but what matters is that he was competitive and they had a heck of a match. Really good opener.

The Broserweights and the Grizzled Young Veterans are in the front row. They’re told that the winners will receive a Tag Team Title shot at Takeover: Portland and Gibson isn’t pleased. He’s seen the Broserweights’ resume and there’s nothing there. The Veterans should win the tournament because they’re the best team in the world.

Matt Riddle talks about how they should be happy over the new prize for the winners. Dunne is stone faced, but Riddle says that’s his happy face. Dunne: “I’ll be blunt.” That makes Riddle VERY happy and we even have to pause for his mini celebration. Dunne promises to smoke the Veterans next week because it’s their trophy to win. Riddle came off like a star here.

Cruiserweight Title: Isaiah Scott vs. Jordan Devlin vs. Travis Banks vs. Angel Garza

One fall to a finish with Garza defending. The fans are behind Scott and all four grab hands to start. Garza asks for a pause so he can TAKE OFF HIS PANTS but it’s a triple suplex to cut him off. Devlin Rock Bottoms Scott and Banks and moonsaults onto both of them. Scott is back up with the rolling Downward Spiral on Banks, followed by the dropkick to Devlin. Devlin and Scott go outside so Garza hits the big flip dive, leaving Banks to hit a stomp from the apron.

Banks kicks at Scott’s chest back inside but Garza joins in, earning himself some Banks kicks as well. Scott kicks Garza into the corner but gets suplexed into a different corner as banks continues to dominate. Scott is sent into Garza in the corner and Banks hits a suicide dive on Devlin. Back in and Banks sends Devlin into the corner onto the other two. Devlin is back up with a crazy spinning tornado DDT on Scott and a Spanish Fly to Garza, only to have Banks dive in with a double stomp for the save.

They slug it out from their knees until Garza sends Banks into Devlin. That means GARZA CAN TAKE OFF HIS PANTS before catching Banks’ crossbody. Devlin can’t hit a hurricanrana on Garza, who holds them both up at once. Scott dives in with a double stomp to Devlin and everyone is down. The House Call to Garza is broken up by Devlin but Banks is back up with a Canadian Destroyer to plant Devlin and everyone is down.

Garza and Scott go up top but get pulled down with a double super Spanish Fly from Devlin. Banks is right back up with the Slice of Heaven into the Kiwi Crusher for two on Devlin to put everyone down again. Banks tries a headscissors out of the corner but Scott flips him forward into something like an Iconoclasm for two. Garza hits a reverse hurricanrana on Scott and the Wing Clipper connects, only to have Devlin headbutt him down. The Devlin Side finishes Scott for the pin and the title at 12:08. Devlin’s celebration is awesome as he looks like he just won the World Title in the main event of Wrestlemania.

Rating: B. I had this one wrong but I can go with this as the Cruiserweight Title doesn’t mean anything on NXT. Devlin has needed a big win for a long time now and that’s the right call here. He’s lost several big matches now so giving him a major win and a title is a good move, especially when there isn’t much for Garza to do with the title in NXT. If nothing else, this might put Devlin on 205 Live, though I’d get a chuckle out of him just never showing up there and having 205 Live pretend the show serves any purpose (like it does now).

Post match Devlin says he told you all and you should believe him. Never bet against the Ace.

Keith Lee, Mia Yim, Chelsea Green and Robert Stone are here.

We recap DIY vs. Moustache Mountain. There isn’t much of a story but they’re both the signature teams of their brands so it’s time to have a dream match.

DIY vs. Moustache Mountain

This could be good. Maybe. Possibly. Gargano and Bate start things off with Gargano taking him down for an armbar. A headlock keeps Bate down and he can’t power out of a front facelock. He can however flip out of a hurricanrana attempt and try the Tyler Driver 97, only to have Gargano slip out this time. Gargano misses the rolling kick to the head so Bate grabs his leg on an attempted kick to the ribs.

Bate is nice enough to put the foot down and it’s a double tag to Seven and Ciampa. They have a moustache off and then a pose down with Seven conceding the second round. Ciampa takes him t the mat but the flip over armbar is countered into a rollup for two. Bate comes back in and he’s willing to pose with Ciampa. We go old school with a test of strength and the taller Ciampa gets the better of things.

They flip over to the mat and bridge up at two each. Bate loads up Bop and Bang but gets hit in the face in a hurry. Ciampa knees Bate to the floor and Gargano superkicks Seven out with him. The Brits are sent over the announcers’ table and DIY have a seat on the apron. Back in and Gargano mocks Bate’s pose before kicking him in the back of the head for two. Ciampa elbows Bate down and we’re off to the chinlock.

Bate finally fights up and flips out so he can tag Seven in for the chops. A DDT drops Gargano and the powerbomb into the Seven Star Lariat gets two on Ciampa. Another lariat is blocked with a jumping knee to the face, which may have knocked out Seven’s tooth. Gargano is back in with a Downward Spiral/DDT combination, followed by the slingshot spear for two on Bate.

Willow’s Bell hits Seven and Gargano’s slingshot DDT gets two on Bate. Gargano and Seven fight to the floor and Ciampa knees Bate in the head. Project Ciampa and the Tyler Driver 97 are countered so Bate hits the rebound lariat instead. Now the Tyler Driver 97 can connect for two with Gargano making the save and kicking Ciampa into a rollup for another two on Bate. Everyone is down until Bate muscles Gargano up into a suplex.

The standing shooting star press gets two and it’s off to the airplane spin. That’s reversed into the Gargano Escape and it’s Ciampa coming in with the flip over armbar to Seven at the same time. Both are reversed into stereo airplane spins, setting up a belly to back suplex/clothesline combination for two on Gargano. Bate is knocked down in the middle so Seven has to save him from Meet In The Middle.

DIY tries it anyway but walk into Bop and Bang, setting up the Birminghammer for two on Ciampa. A double Birminghammer hits Ciampa so Bate goes up for Spiral Tap, with Ciampa pulling Seven into the path to steal his own near fall in a great spot. They slug it out with DIY getting the better of it and superkicking Bate out of the air. That leaves Seven to take Meet In The Middle for the pin at 22:54.

Rating: A-. The beginning felt like it was going to be a comedy match but then things got serious and they beat the fire out of each other for the next fifteen or so minutes. Moustache Mountain can hang with anyone, including DIY, but it only makes sense to have DIY go over here when they’re likely going after the Tag Team Titles over Wrestlemania weekend. Either way, incredible stuff here with no clear winner almost the entire way through.

Post match, respect is shown.

Mercedes Martinez and Dakota Kai are here….and Tegan Nox jumps Kai from behind. They fight to ringside until security breaks them up, much to the fans’ annoyance.

We recap Toni Storm. They’re old rivals with Storm having beaten her twice and now wanting a shot at the new champ. Storm leads the series 2-1 so Ripley wants to even things up and keep her title.

#1 contender Bianca Belair is here.

NXT Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Toni Storm

Ripley is defending. They fight over a lockup to start and the fans are split. That goes nowhere so Storm forearms away, only to get blasted with a chop. A staredown sets up some clotheslines from Ripley but she walks into a superkick in the corner. Storm suplexes her into the corner and Ripley needs a breather on the floor. With her neck seemingly ok, Storm grabs a suplex for two and it’s off to an STF variation. That’s broken up so Storm hits a DDT for two more.

The chinlock doesn’t last long but some shots to the back have Rhea in more trouble. They slug it out with Ripley getting the better of it and kicking her into the corner. The standing Cloverleaf goes on but Ripley can’t get it on in full because of her neck. Riptide is countered into a crossbody to give Storm two. Storm’s German suplex drops Ripley on her head for two more but they hit heads for a double knockdown. It’s Storm up first but she misses a frog splash, setting up Riptide for the pin to retain Rhea’s title at 10:09.

Rating: C. Well that was….short. I’m not sure if Ripley was actually banged up in there or not because that’s a pretty fast ending to what could have been a much longer match. What we got was nice enough and Ripley winning is the best way to go, but that was very short for what could have been a longer match. The fans weren’t exactly into it though and that disappoints me a good bit.

During the previous match, Johnny Gargano was doing an interview when Finn Balor jumped him. Tommaso Ciampa and Moustache Mountain made the save.

We recap Imperium vs. Undisputed Era. The Era jumped them at the end of Takeover: Blackpool II and then Imperium cost them their Dusty Classic match. They’re the big faction in both companies and it’s time for a showdown.

Undisputed Era vs. Imperium

The medics come in and take him to the floor so it’s Walter vs. Cole instead. Walter throws him down so Cole decides to slap him for some reason. The threat of the big chop sends Cole bailing into the corner but Walter gets knocked into the Era’s corner. Walter is right back up with a leapfrog over Strong into a big boot, meaning Aichner can come in to stand at attention. Cole saves Strong from a powerbomb and takes over on Barthel with some elbows to the head.

It’s O’Reilly unleashing the strikes in the corner and Strong blasts Barthel so hard in the jaw that it brings Walter in for a few seconds. There’s the slingshot hilo from Fish and Cole slaps on the chinlock. O’Reilly kicks Walter on the apron and Walter just glares at him. The distraction lets Barthel get in a Russian legsweep though and it’s Walter coming in, meaning O’Reilly hits the panic button. The strikes are countered into a German suplex but O’Reilly reverses the powerbomb into a guillotine.

Just to show off, Walter suplexes Strong and O’Reilly at the same time. Barthel elbows O’Reilly in the face for two and it’s Aichner putting on a chinlock. It’s back to Walter for a running seated senton and the LOUD chop takes the spirit out of O’Reilly’s eyes for two. The running double dropkick in the corner rocks O’Reilly again but he dives around Walter for the tag off to Strong. He chops it out with Walter and actually knocks him into the ropes for the running elbows.

That’s broken up with a single clothesline so Aichner comes in. A heck of a tiger bomb sets up the Strong Hold but Aichner is out in a hurry. White Noise gives Barthel two but Fish gets away and brings in Cole to pick up the pace. The Panama Sunrise is blocked so it’s a fireman’s carry neckbreaker for two on Barthel instead. Walter comes back in so everyone but Cole pounds him down at the same time.

The announcers’ table is loaded up but Walter fights them off and loads up another table. O’Reilly and Strong have to break up a powerbomb and it’s the Angle Slam to put Walter through the table in a huge crash. Back in and it’s an exchange of strikes to the face, including Cole superkicking Aichner out of the air. Cole hits the brainbuster onto the knee to Barthel for two and the running knee to the face gets the same. Aichner comes back in and gets kicked down in a hurry.

O’Reilly gets Barthel in a kneebar but a crawl makes the rope. The hold is still on so Aichner moonsaults in to break it up. Aichner gets beaten down on the floor but Walter is back on the apron. An enziguri allows the hot tag to Walter to wreck everything in sight. Cole hits a superkick but the Last Shot is broken up with the huge chop.

The powerbomb hits Strong and the frog splash crushes him but Cole breaks it up with the Last Shot. Aichner and Barthel break that up at two and everyone is down again. Everyone gets up for the staredown and the fight is on. Walter gets taken down by High/Low and Strong flip dives over the top onto Cole, O’Reilly and Barthel. Aichner follows that with a dive of his own but Fish’s moonsault misses Walter. The powerbomb finishes Fish at 29:53.

Rating: A. Even with one of the eight people out of the match, these guys put on a clinic with great drama throughout with the Era using a strategy of divide and conquer. The problem with that is they had no answer for Walter, who came back up and wrecked the place, which is how you should have presented him here. It’s going to take a monster to take the title from Walter and I’m not sure who that is right now. This was a showcase for everyone involved though and the match was great up and down. Hopefully Wolfe is ok though because that’s the most important thing.

A highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: A. The women’s match is the only thing on here that isn’t great and even that was completely watchable. This is one that actually lived up to the hype and that is hard to do given how good the show was looking on paper. It even added something to the future because NXT is smart enough to do something like that. This show flew by at about three hours total, making it an easy sit with some amazing matches. Check this one out for sure.

Results

Finn Balor b. Ilja Dragunov – 1916

Jordan Devlin b. Angel Garza, Isaiah Scott and Travis Banks – Devlin Side to Scott

DIY b. Moustache Mountain – Meet In The Middle to Seven

Rhea Ripley b. Toni Storm – Riptide

Imperium b. Undisputed Era – Powerbomb to Fish

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

These are the ones that stick in your mind forever because they’re what people remember more than anything else. Some of these can come at the end of a match, during a segment, backstage, or really anywhere in between. They might not mean much in the long run or they could change everything forever. Either way, they’re the things that people remember the most and that is the case as we enter a new decade.

Honorable Mention

Big E. Langston Faces The Shield – NXT – January 2, 2012 – This is a personal one for me. NXT Champion Seth Rollins was defending against Corey Graves when the Shield interfered. GM Dusty Rhodes sent out the locker room and they all got slaughtered as well. Watching at home, I said out loud “In a good promotion, this is where the monster would come out for a showdown.” As soon as I said it, Big E. came out and the Shield ran. I was hooked.

Sting Debuts – Survivor Series 2014 – Yes, that actually happened after all the years. It didn’t mean anything in the long run, but for an old WCW fan, this was magical.

Daniel Bryan Is Medically Cleared – Smackdown – March 20, 2018 – I never thought I would see the day but it actually happened. This was a feel good story as Bryan was FINALLY back in the ring where he belonged after three long years away. Good for him and he’s still going strong.

Women Main Event Wrestlemania – Wrestlemania XXXV – At Wrestlemania XXVI, the women’s match was a ten woman tag that ran 3:26. XXVII and XXIX didn’t have a women’s match. XXVIII had a women’s celebrity match. XXX was a big cluster match. We’ve come a long way and again, I never thought I would see something like this.

Austin, Rock and Hogan Together – Wrestlemania XXX – Yep.

Undertaker/HHH/Shawn Michaels Hug

This was arguably fifteen years in the making, as the three of them had had so many battles and wars over the years. The last four Wrestlemanias had offered some of the best matches in recent memory as the three legends left it all in the ring and nearly destroyed each other in one classic after another. The final blowoff in the Cell had the best near fall I’ve ever seen. It was a roller coaster the whole way through and it had to end with something special.

That’s exactly what it did too, as all three got together and hugged on the stage, signaling that the wars were over (until Australia and Saudi Arabia needed big matches of course). This would never happen at such a level again and it was amazing to get to watch these things unfold in front of our eyes. They were incredible performers at the top of their game and deserved every second of what they got.

Kofi Kingston Wins

One of the things you hear a lot about in wrestling is the journey that you have to take to get to the goal and that is how things were with Kofi Kingston. He debuted in 2006 and seemed incapable of having a bad match. However, he also never made it close to the main event scene and the idea of him being a World Champion seemed impossible. Then we came to the Elimination Chamber in 2019 and it wound up being Kofi vs. Daniel Bryan for the WWE Championship.

I don’t remember the last time that so many people snapped to attention so fast. Somehow this felt like something that could really happen and that’s what needed to happen. Kingston could actually do it and while he didn’t make it at the Elimination Chamber, he was suddenly a real threat to the title. That took us to Wrestlemania XXXV and he did it. Kofi Kingston actually did it and won the WWE Championship clean in the middle of the ring. It was a special moment and everyone knew it, because Kofi Kingston had earned every single thing that he was finally getting.

Becky Lynch Bleeds And Stands Tall

There are moments in wrestling where you can feel something is about to happen. When Hogan returned in 1984 to save Bob Backlund. When Austin Stunned McMahon. When Batista gave HHH the thumbs down. You can see the future before you and you know where things are going. The energy spikes and it doesn’t matter what happens next, because you know where it’s going.

That’s what happened on the November 12, 2018 Monday Night Raw when Becky Lynch led the Smackdown women in an invasion of Monday Night Raw. Lynch attacked Ronda Rousey in the locker room and then took the fight to the stage. A damaged Ronda came out but got taken down….as Nia Jax wildly swung and knocked Becky silly, breaking her nose and giving her a concussion in the process. Lynch wasn’t done and kept fighting, eventually being forced to flee into the crowd. The show ended with a bloody Becky posing near the top of the arena and a star was born. It was Becky’s time and everyone knew it, in case they didn’t before.

Daniel Bryan Wins

This one is similar to Kofi but I think it’s just a bit better. Kofi’s run had only taken place over the course of about six weeks while this one was over more than six months, with Bryan being screwed over by the Authority but never giving up (that’s kind of a trend with him) and eventually found his way to the main event of Wrestlemania XXX. Then the magic happened.

The main story here was a major villain, with the Authority constantly telling us that Bryan was never going to reach the top. That gave Bryan a reason to fight, and fight he did, all the way to the highest point that he could with an amazing performance that went beyond anything we could have expected. It felt like a changing of the guard in a feel good moment, which was exactly what they were shooting for. Well done indeed.

CM Punk Wins

There are times in wrestling where you say “That couldn’t happen….right?” That last word is where everything gets interesting, because all WWE has to do is go there and they have their fans right where they want them. That’s what they did going into Money In The Bank 2011, as CM Punk threatened to win the WWE Championship and leave the company with the title. That couldn’t happen…right?

Well that’s exactly what DID happen and it was one of the first times I can remember where I didn’t know what to expect. That’s an incredible feeling to have and it worked like a charm here. While it got brought down a lot by having Punk back two weeks later, it was a special moment and Punk blowing a kiss to Vince before leaving through the crowd is as good as it gets.

And now, as bad as it gets.

The Streak….Is Over

I’ve been a wrestling fan for over thirty years. During that time, a lot of things have come and gone and that is always going to be the case. When I was born, Hulk Hogan was the WWF Champion. Now, Hogan is recently back from being blackballed from the company and only gets to make the occasional legends appearance. For most of my life though, there were only a handful of constants. One of those was taken away at Wrestlemania XXX.

On that night, Brock Lesnar defeated the Undertaker, ending a Streak which began over 23 years earlier (on Undertaker’s birthday actually). It’s something I never thought I would see and I really did believe that there was a chance it would live forever. I was in the stadium that night and I could not stand up or speak. It was that kind of shock: they managed to shut me up, and that’s all the proof you need that this was one for the ages.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: August 25, 2005
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Summerslam has come and gone and that means a lot of things have wrapped up for good. First and foremost, Batista defeated JBL to retain the Smackdown World Title, which means we need a new #1 contender. Other than that, Rey Mysterio defeated Eddie Guerrero (again) to gain custody of his son, but I wouldn’t bet on the feud being done just yet. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Summerslam if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Summerslam, or at least the Smackdown side of it.

Here’s Cowboy Bob Orton to talk about how Randy Orton did exactly what he promised to do at Summerslam. This brings out Randy….and he’s having a match.

Randy Orton vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly is now the Alabama Slamma. Feeling out process to start as they shove each other around a bit with the fans being all over Randy. Orton is smart enough to get away from the threat of a chop as we’re still waiting to get into first gear. The threat of an Alabama Slam (or Slamma according to Cole) freaks Orton out again so they can stare at each other even more.

Holly cranks things up with a headlock takeover but Orton reverses into one of his own. Back up and another Alabama Slam attempt is countered so Holly takes him down with an STF. A suplex gives Holly two but Orton runs him over and drops the knee for his own near fall. The neck crank keeps Holly in trouble but he breaks up the superplex attempt.

Holly’s middle rope elbow hits (kind of) a raised boot so he goes right right hands instead. A full nelson slam gives Holly two and a top rope clothesline connects for the same. The Alabama Slam is loaded up so Bob gets on the apron for a distraction. The RKO doesn’t work though and Holly hits the great dropkick for two more. Since it didn’t work the first time, Bob grabs Holly’s leg and now the RKO can finish him off.

Rating: D. This wasn’t good with a weird opening that felt like they were on different planets at times. Then there’s the ending, which could have been done just fine off the initial distraction and didn’t need the second. It also doesn’t say much when you need the same help to beat both the Undertaker and Bob Holly. Summerslam was one thing but you really don’t need the same help for both.

Theodore Long comes into his office and finds a man in a suit that he doesn’t recognize. That would be Palmer Cannon, who works for the network. Which network? Not important here. Anyway, he’s here to help Smackdown continue to be successful in his time slot and to make sure the network’s opinion is represented. In two weeks, the show is moving to Friday nights and Cannon has a huge main event for the debut show. That would be Batista vs. JBL for the World Title, which suggests that Cannon isn’t very good at his job.

Here’s Christian for the Peep Show. Before we get to the business, Christian is ready to face the Mexicools anytime because he just finally got the smell out of his carpet. As for tonight though, here are his guests: Booker T. and Sharmell. Christian welcomes Mr. and Mrs. T. and starts explaining that Booker is a five time, five time….but Booker cuts him off because that’s his stuff. Therefore, Christian asks his first hard question: are they still on speaking terms?

We see a clip of the mixed tag last week with Jillian Hall tripping Sharmell to give Melina the pin. Christian calls Booker out for the non-wrestler wife losing, which puts him in contention for the Ike Turner/Tommy Lee Husband of the Year Award. Sharmell has to hold Booker back as Christian talks about all of Booker’s accomplishments. Granted he can’t think of any at the moment….so what has Booker exactly done lately? Sharmell: “That’s a pretty good question.”

Johnny Nitro vs. Heidenreich

Jillian Hall introduces MNM and brags about the team being on the cover of Smackdown Magazine. Animal, Mercury, Melina and Hall are at ringside. Heidenreich goes with the power to start, including a running knee to rock Nitro. The threat of a shot to the face puts Nitro on the floor and he has to run from Animal for a bonus. Back in and Nitro gets in a kick of his own for two and we hit the chinlock. Heidenreich fights up and hits a few clotheslines, setting up a side slam for two. Everyone gets on the apron at the same time and Mercury chairs Heidenreich in the knee for the DQ.

Raw Rebound.

Chris Benoit is proud of making Orlando Jordan tap out in 25.5 seconds and wants to see what else he can do that fast. We get a clock n the screen and see the whole match as Benoit tries to make a cup of coffee faster than he made Jordan tap out. Benoit wins again. Ok that’s really funny.

JBL yells at Jordan for losing so badly but ignore that because JBL needs him tonight. And make it longer than 25.5 seconds!

Christian/Booker T. vs. Mexicools

Juvy is the odd man out here. It’s a brawl to start with Booker and Christian taking over until we settle down to Christian faceplanting Crazy for an early two. Booker comes in to kick Psicosis in the chest but it’s back to Christian, who goes shoulder first into the post. Crazy’s middle rope missile dropkick gets two so Booker has to be held back from interfering.

Christian can’t fight away from everyone at once and walks into a spinwheel kick from Psicosis. The moonsault misses for Crazy though and it’s back to Booker for the house cleaning. Juvy offers a distraction so the double teaming can ensue. Sharmell tells Christian to get in there but he walks out instead, leaving Booker to take a double belly to back suplex to give Psicosis the pin.

Rating: D+. The Mexicools still aren’t interesting but at least they’re not beating big names clean. Booker vs. Christian is something we’ve done before and I’m not wild on seeing it again, but the Sharmell factor would suggest that a heel turn is coming for Booker. If nothing else, I could go for a Booker vs. Batista in a one off title match.

Post match, Sharmell yells at Booker some more. That’s kind of all she does isn’t it?

The Ortons brag about destroying the Undertaker and have even signed an Undertaker DVD. It’s going to be auctioned off on WWE.com and the proceeds will go towards Undertaker’s retirement, because he’s dead.

Cannon praises/recaps tonight’s show and wants more Orton on Smackdown. Long doesn’t think that’s the best idea because he has an announcement to make. Cannon stops him, because he wants to know first. That’s not happening because Cannon can find out when everyone else does….right now. Oh yeah Cannon is going to get old in a hurry.

Here’s Long in the ring to announce a lingerie pillow match. He has two women who he knows “can shake that Laffy Taffy” so here are the two newest Smackdown Divas: Stacy Keibler and Christy Hemme. They’re about to disrobe but here’s Cannon to say the network doesn’t want to see this. So yeah, he’s your new heel boss, because this show needed two authority figures.

Ken Kennedy vs. Funaki

Kennedy has been on Velocity before and now he’s making his Smackdown debut. He does his own ring announcing, insisting that Funaki speaks no English but is somehow the #1 announcer. Oh and he says his name twice, which is apparently brilliant. Funaki armdrags him down to start and works on a wristlock but gets sent outside. Kennedy tells everyone to clear out of the way….as he throws Funaki back inside. A splash hits raised knees though and Funaki scores with an enziguri. Kennedy crotches him on top though and finishes with the Green Bay Plunge. Not a blow away debut but you can feel his charisma to start.

Kennedy declares himself the winner. And that’s Mr. Kennedy.

Chris Benoit/Rey Mysterio/Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield/Orlando Jordan/Eddie Guerrero

Triple Summerslam rematch and the entrances take their sweet time. JBL, Eddie and Rey are very banged up (with Eddie’s arm and JBL’s ribs heavily taped) after Sunday. Benoit and Jordan start because that’s a great idea for the team. Jordan is quickly German suplexed into the corner and Benoit beats him to the floor for an early break. Back with Eddie hammering on Rey because he can’t let anything go.

A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Rey but he’s right back with the wheelbarrow bulldog. JBL comes in to stare at Rey before demanding Batista. That’s what he gets and the slugout is on, even though the interest was gone after their first match. Batista drives him into the corner for shoulders to the ribs and Benoit comes in to stomp away at them as well. A suplex gets two but Benoit is sent outside for a right hand from Jordan. That actually works for a change and Eddie takes over on Benoit inside.

The abdominal stretch stretches Benoit’s abdominals until Jordan comes in to grab the same hold. Benoit hiptosses his way out because Jordan is worthless and it’s back to JBL to hammer away. Jordan comes back in for two off a swinging neckbreaker and JBL comes in again before Jordan can screw anything up. Benoit avoids a charge though and hits an enziguri, allowing the hot tag to Batista. House is cleaned but Eddie breaks up the Batista Bomb to Jordan. Everything breaks down and a 619 into a German suplex into the Batista Bomb finishes Jordan.

Rating: C-. This felt like a post show dark match that got to appear on TV. That’s not a bad thing either as it’s something they can play safe without hurting anyone in the process. Jordan is there to take falls and that’s all he should be doing. Batista continues to look dominant as champion, but another match with JBL sounds as uninteresting as I can imagine at the moment.

Overall Rating: D-. Anything good that Smackdown had going for it before Summerslam has been wiped out now as this was a wreck of a show. There was almost nothing good in any sense and the idea of a heel authority figure, even if it seems to be there to mock UPN, makes my head hurt. It’s a stupid idea that has been played out for years and now we get to do it again as Smackdown channels ECW on TNN. Awful show here, with one bad match after another and a lot of uninteresting people getting television time. Hopefully it back to normal next week, because this was dreadful.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6