IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 1989
Date: January 15, 1989
Location: The Summit, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 19,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

We have arrived at Pay Per View for this one and just looking at the card you can tell things are…about the same actually. Again there are just four matches and a segment, although this one is an improvement. The matches not called the Rumble aren’t exactly jumping off the page at me, but looking at a few names in the Rumble it’s a massive improvement with guys like Hogan, Savage, Andre, and DiBiase in it.

The segment is also better as it’s a posedown between Ultimate Warrior and Rick Rude who were kind of feuding at the time. You can just tell that the show has a much higher production value and has had more time put into it which likely will mean a much better product. Granted that’s just on paper.

I wonder how the show itself would turn out. I wish there was a way I could find out. Oh. I guess I could just watch it. I think I’ll do that, and I might as well write about it too, so why don’t you come along? If I get hungry I can always eat your leg.

Our opening video is Vince listing off all of the participants in the match. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not because it keeps surprises from occurring which is one of the highlights of the match. I get what they’re going for here but at the same time it’s just a bit odd.

Jesse’s shirt has a big shark on it. That’s most odd. He and Gorilla run down the card and we’re ready to go.

A bunch of guys take WAY too long to say they’ll win.

Dino Bravo/Rougeaus vs. Hart Foundation/Jim Duggan

What is with the Rumble and 2/3 fall matches? This makes three in two years. Isn’t that a bit of overkill guys? This is really just about two feuds being lumped into one match which is fine. They say it’s international rules to justify the 2/3 falls which is fine, but the choice is just odd indeed. It’s not necessarily good or bad but just odd. The heels have Frenchie Martin and Jimmy Hart with them.

Monsoon says that the 2×4 is a mascot and not a foreign object. That’s just odd indeed. The Harts do this weird thing of taking Bret’s glasses off and make it a spectacle. I don’t remember them doing that ever before. We start with power vs. power in Bravo vs. Neidhart. They reference the weightlifting thing from last year which makes me want to rip my hair out. The USA chant goes up for an American and two Canadians (Neidhart has dual citizenship).

They’re going really slowly here and I’m not sure if I like that. They talk about Bret’s awesome in ring ability which is completely true. It’s good to know that they saw the talent that far back. Bret then takes the side suplex from Bravo and the elevated seated senton from the Rougeaus (both of their finishers) to make it 1-0 for the heels. Bret has to start the next fall as we are LIVE IN HOUSTON!

Gorilla once again botches the use of the term literally as no one is hanging from the rafters. I don’t know why but I will never stop marking out for the jumping reverse elbow from anyone. That move is just awesome. Once again Bravo does his stupid little dance before he makes a tag. I’ve never gotten what the deal was with that. Bret is still in there by the way. Again, it never ceases to amaze me when fans chant USA for two Canadian wrestlers.

Monsoon tries to cover for them by saying it’s for Duggan, but why chant for him when he’s not even in the match at the moment? Either way it’s just stupid. We hit a rest hold with Bret getting beaten on even more than usual in this match. Not sure why he’s been in there so long but it’s probably the best thing they could do. The Rougeaus do a switch and for the life of me I don’t get how people couldn’t tell them apart.

They look nothing alike. The abdominal stretch is hooked and Gorilla complains. Good thing that some things never change. FINALLY Bret tags out and Duggan is in. After a lot of double teaming Duggan pins one of the Rougeaus to tie us up at one. For some reason Hacksaw is over and by far and away the biggest star in this match. I don’t get that and never will.

The heels take over for a very short time as Bravo idiotically (at least he’s living up to his reputation) tries to ram Duggan’s head into the turnbuckle. The face comeback lasts all of a second though as Duggan is beaten on even more. After the luke warm tag to Bret, we have a big thing of calamity and Duggan pops Bravo with the board to let Bret pin him. I love faces getting away with everything they want to.

Rating: C+. Nothing bad at all here, but I just don’t get the 2/3 falls aspect. I mean really, why do that? Do these six guys need an extra ten minutes or so? I get that there’s a lot of time to fill and a ton of the roster is taken, but I don’t get it. To be fair though, the match was fine and there’s nothing to complain about from an in ring perspective. It wasn’t anything great but perfectly fine.

We see some people picking their numbers.

DiBiase doesn’t like his number but pulls in Slick and offers him a deal.

Luke and Butch both get theirs and trade them.

Honky hates his.

Bad News likes his.

Demolition and Jake are indifferent.

The Rockers wish each other good luck.

Super Posedown

This is more or less a body contest between Warrior and Rude. Well that’s more interesting than Bravo’s weightlifting I suppose. Warrior is IC Champion here. Monsoon says Warrior is pumped up all the time. Make your own steroids joke. Rude is rocking the mustache here. The first pose is the double bicep. Popular support wins this so take a guess as to who is going to win. This is really quite boring.

Jesse and Heenan try to make this seem legit which is helping things out a lot. We move to the abdominal pose for which Heenan has to oil up Rude. That’s just creepy to an extent. The third is just called most muscular. If nothing else they’re keeping this moving fast. That’s the best part about it unlike last year when it took 20 minutes. Also, this is actually in the ring. We go through the third pose and still no one cares. The fourth is a medley which takes up even more time.

Was there supposed to be a point to this? In a shocking development, Rude jumps Warrior and beats the tar out of him with an exercise bar. That was the whole point of this thing and it took too long. Again though, it was far better than the weightlifting thing last year. Warrior gets up and destroys all of the referees and suits that try to help him up and chases after Rude. This was all to set up Rude vs. Warrior at Mania.

Women’s Title: Rockin Robin vs. Judy Martin

Robin was this random chick they put the belt on and since she was the epitome of the bathroom break match, they kept the belt on her for over a year. It was retired in 1990 because no one cared and remained that way until Alundra Blayze came along and held it for about a year, then after about another year of various feuds and champions it was dropped (into the trashcan on Nitro) and didn’t come back until the Sable era.

She was just flat out boring, plain and simple, yet of course Vince stuck with her because no one really gave cared about women’s wrestling anyway and it was based on wrestling rather than athleticism or looks. Sherri, the woman that Robin took the title from, challenges the winner for a title shot. She wouldn’t win. Just after the start of the match she jumps on commentary. There’s something that even the commentators aren’t sure about but they think it was a DDT.

Again I want to know what the point of hooking the head on a slam is. I don’t recall any man other than Earthquake doing that. Sherri sounds like Michelangelo from TMNT 2. This is really short and a relief that Wikipedia has an error. They claim this is about sixteen minutes when it barely breaks five.

I thought this might have been clipped but I can’t find a single instance where it goes sixteen, so we’ll say that’s an error, which is a relief. Robin wins with a second rope cross body after faking one then getting the second. Robin’s music is really annoying.

Rating: C. I have to go with average here because other than the ending I don’t remember anything about this match. I know that doesn’t sound good, but the time in this match and everything in it are complete blanks to me. Nothing at all of note happened in it other than the ending, which was kind of cool as the fake out isn’t something that you see that often. I think I get why the division was dropped in about a year.

Sean Mooney is with Slick and the Twin Towers, Akeem and Big Boss Man. Akeem might be the funniest character in wrestling history. Slick denies the deal with DiBiase from earlier. Sean shows the footage of them talking about a deal earlier, which Slick tries to play off as something about a shoe shine. That was just odd.

Harley Race vs. Haku

A few notes about this match: first of all, it wasn’t on the home video release at first so quite a few of you have likely never seen it. It’s only been released on the Rumble Anthologies and the original broadcast plus online. Second, this is a one night only return for Race who got really badly hurt against Hogan and had to drop the crown. Haku took it but never beat Race, so Race is back to take his crown.

Before the match, Jesse is sitting on the throne and says he likes it. Thanks for that Jess. I’ve actually never seen this match all the way through so these will be my legit first thoughts on seeing this in its entirety. When I say not all the way through, I mean I’ve seen a few stills of it and never any actual video so here we go. Heenan manages both guys so he’s set no matter what. I’ve always liked the throne entrance the king got, but DANG that jobber needs a shirt.

He must weigh about 320 and he’s in just regular tights. That’s not right. Both guys come out to the same music and in a funny bit, Race is introduced as “The Former King, Harley Race!” That just sounds funny. Race, the king of the heels, jumps Haku early. Both guys have the regal purple on which is amusing as well. I think Race is somehow the face here, which just makes me feel dirty.

The tattoos on Race always looked odd to me as he seems too clean for them I guess you would say. This was a very rare thing here as we have heel vs. heel with Race being the less heelish guy. Race is just old here and is being asked to carry this because he’s the only one of the two that knows how to work a good match. Jesse says that he has to give the experience advantage to Race. Well DUH Jess. How can it be something that’s debatable?

One guy has wrestled longer than the other. It’s not really subjective. The fans are cheering Harley. This just isn’t right. They do one of the all time worst collision spots with Race going to the floor. It looked like they were in slow motion on that one. Heenan is his usual masterful self cheering for both guys at various times. This is called the Battle For the Crown because this is a match that was dying for extra billing.

Speaking of dying, Gorilla tries to say that the crowd is hushed in anticipation for the Rumble. You have to give it to Gorilla: he never gave up. Race gets a bad piledriver on the floor as it seems like this is in slow motion again. They’re just both so slow that it’s almost painful to watch. Race simply had no business being in a ring at this point and it wasn’t even his fault. He was just old and injured which certainly isn’t something you can pin on him.

He was broke due to a bad business thing (that wasn’t his fault) in Kansas City so he had to keep wrestling to pay the bills. He was good for stuff like this: putting over guys that can’t wrestle well enough on their own. I love how you can have a guy do some chops at an angle and all of a sudden he’s a martial arts master. Goodness that was a lot of A’s in a row. After Race dominates for a bit, he misses a punch and gets caught by what we would call Sweet Chin Music to get pinned.

Rating: C-. I feel sorry here because the wrestling and the in ring stuff isn’t actually that bad at all. The problem is that it feels like this is in slow motion like I’ve said a few times. That’s really the best way to put it. Race was just so old out there that I’m very glad he went to WCW and became a manager which was what he was far better suited for at this point.

He just was too old here and it was showing bad. Haku was someone that had to be carried and this was his night to be put over and while he wasn’t bad, he certainly wasn’t good. The match was bad but the wrestling was ok if that makes any sense at all.

More people say they’ll win.

Gene talks to Rude and Heenan about the pose down where Rude says he won. They bail quickly, I’m assuming afraid of the Warrior.

Royal Rumble

I’ll spare you from another rule explanation because I’m sure you know it and I already listed them off once. This year they point out the everyman for themselves rule though, which is a change from last year. That opens a big door though as it implies face vs. face and heel vs. heel. Number one is Ax of Demolition. The interval is set at two minutes again and this year they actually make it possible as the match goes over an hour, so sit back because this is going to be a long review.

Actually don’t sit back because you might not be able to see the screen. Sit in the middle I guess. Number two is Smash, so we have Demolition going at it to start us off. I love how random of a thing this is, and it’s happened at least one other time that I remember with the Steiners I think, and then the Hardys came in at 1 and 3 in 2001. They’re the tag team champions here, in the middle of their epic year and a half or so run.

To their credit they beat on each other. It just doesn’t look right though. This is like Bubba and D-Von fighting. They’re just not good at fighting on their own. There’s something about seeing partners fight that just doesn’t work. Matt and Jeff were complete failures in their feud, and I think a lot of it is people would rather have them be partners rather than opponents. They just didn’t click as opponents and that’s a shame.

Andre comes in at three and this is an historic moment, as Demolition immediately beat him to the ground with what looks like ease. Andre looks like Rey Mysterio getting beaten on like this which is something you’ll never hear again. Mr. Perfect is 4 which sucks because I wanted more Andre vs. Demolition. Think about this for a minute. Demolition did in about ten seconds what it took Hogan fifteen minutes to do. That’s insane.

No wonder those three plus Jake were the best Survivor Series team of all time. All three of them go after the Giant and Andre just shoves Smash out after Perfect distracts him a bit. Perfect is a very young guy here in the company and is rocking just regular tights. Being the Rhodes scholar that Axe is he goes after Perfect and gets beaten up by Andre for his trouble. Number five is the best possible advertisement for murdering something I’ve ever seen: Ronnie Garvin.

He is easily the most worthless wrestler this side of the Junkyard dog in wrestling history. How in the world did they ever decide to put him over RIC FLAIR for the world title? I just do not get that and never will. Everyone goes after Andre but he just sits on Axe, literally. Greg Valentine is in at six, hopefully willing to use a hammer to crush the cockroach known as Garvin.

We have four against one here with literally everyone that’s been in the match so far attacking Andre. Gorilla calls everyone that’s beating on Andre a star. That’s just amusing. ANDRE GETS RID OF GARVIN!!! I officially love this man. Get him a cow and a vineyard of wine right now!

Jake Roberts is seventh to a huge pop. He was probably the second third biggest face at the time as Warrior wasn’t quite there yet and Hogan and Savage were untouchable. Andre just chokes the life out of Jake in the corner which is sweet. That’s what I love about Andre: after being quadruple teamed he just grabs someone and chokes them. There’s something completely awesome about that.

He beats anyone that tries to stop him from beating on Jake. That’s just sweet. He’s protecting Jake so he can have the honor of hurting him. Ron Bass is here now as we get closer to reaching our jobber quota. Just after Bass comes in Andre throws Jake out. Bass is freshly bald thanks to a bad comedy angle with Beefcake. Andre is the white elephant in there at the moment as it’s really just about trying to get him out with various incredibly short term alliances.

That right there is why there needs to be at least one giant in every battle royal. They offer the main source of a story in one of these, because traditionally these matches are void of any kind of a story because it’s a complete free for all, which is fine because that’s the point.

Having someone like Andre in there for about fifteen to twenty minutes gives you a way to have something running through a large part of the match and hold it together, which is the main weakness of all battle royals not known as the Royal Rumble. The next guy in is HBK, who at this time is next to nothing. Perfect throws Axe out.

Shawn and Perfect go at it in what would eventually be one of the most overhyped feuds in wrestling history as the build was awesome but the match kind of sucked, which to be fair was what likely was inevitable. Perfect shows off his brains early by staying in after going over the top. Andre keeps choking people as that was the essence of his offense around this time. I really miss the old school stone looking Rumble logo. The thing was just cool looking.

Jesse says if he were in there he’d go to a neutral corner. Gorilla says if Jesse were in there he’d be out of there. And people wonder why Monsoon got some strange looks at times. After about a minute and a half of waiting, Butch of the Bushwackers gets us into double digits. As he’s coming to the ring, Jake runs back out with Damien and Andre eliminates himself. That’s a smart way to keep the feud hot, keep Andre looking credible and get rid of him to keep the match going.

The five jobbers lumber around the ring for a bit because there’s no big name in there for them to do anything with, which is the issue with a lot of these things. The timing is getting shorter and shorter here as Honky comes in at 11. Honky had recently lost the IC belt and was in desperate need of a reason to keep his job. He was worthless without the title so until they put him in Rhythm and Blues there was little for him to do.

Of the six guys in there, Shawn is the only face according to Gorilla in some slightly different words. Oh Butch is there too. Yep, Shawn is the only face in there worth anything. Tito balances things out a bit at 12 to a solid pop. I don’t get why he never got another big push. He was still great in the ring and was getting big reactions, but of course he was made a jobber to the stars for guys like Barbarian and Warlord.

Gorilla and Jesse discuss some theory about what is considered a good number as not a lot is going on at the moment. To be fair though the crowd is staying hot so there we are. Bad News comes in at 13 as he should have been a far bigger star than he was. Brown vs. Hogan could have been awesome if they had some guts and did it right. Honky is eliminated pretty fast to a decent pop. That’s a good sign if nothing else: he’s still getting reactions.

This has really slowed down a lot and we need some big names to come in and clear out some of these jobbers. Naturally the next guy in is Marty Jannetty, so if nothing else we have a tag team in there now. A double dropkick that was NOT stolen from the Rock N Roll Express (really, we promise we’ve never heard of those guys that we stole half our name from. Honest) takes out Bass to get us back down to seven people. I think Tito’s knee is hurt.

Thankfully Savage, the WWF Champion and on the brink of a heel turn for the ages, comes in to get the crowd WAY into this. He freaking mugs Bad News who he was having a short but very intense feud with. Arn Anderson comes out next as Savage knocks out Valentine. In the epitome of an IWC wet dream team, Anderson and Savage team up to eliminate Shawn. Dang that was just flat out odd to type. Tully Blanchard is in at 17 as this is slowing down again.

The Brainbusters beat the tar out of Jannetty and prove why they’re awesome. They dump him and heeeeeeere’s Hulk at possibly his lowest number ever: 18. I would have loved to have this be a legit draw and see him get like 4. Let’s see, how many people does Hogan get rid of to make him look like Superman. Perfect is the first victim as Hogan saves his handshake buddy Savage from him. He beats up the Brainbusters but doesn’t eliminate them, which allows them to get rid of Tito.

Since it’s gotten a bit crazy, for a recap we have Butch, Hogan, Anderson, Savage, Brown and Blanchard in at the moment. Amazingly, Butch has been in there about fifteen minutes which has to be his biggest accomplishment in the WWF. That’s actually quite surprising. At 19 we have the other Marching Moron who licked me at a house show once. Brown puts out Butch to keep us at six guys.

Anderson beats on Hogan which makes me flash back to Nitro just before the NWO showed up. Anderson beat him two weeks straight on Nitro which was a series I always liked. It gave Arn the spotlight that he never really got and definitely was qualified to have. In at 20 is the Hall of Famer Koko B. Ware. That just flat out doesn’t work no matter how many times you write it. How in the world is that thing in the HOF but Savage isn’t?

I don’t care how many times he had Stephanie, enshrine him already! Hogan dumps Koko to a pop. Even the fans didn’t like him. There goes Luke and Hogan’s total is at I think three. With three clotheslines inside of 30 seconds he adds both Brainbusters and the Warlord who sets the shortness record at 2 seconds. He stepped in and got a running clothesline to put him out.

To get the record to eight, Hogan runs over and puts out Brown and Savage, the later being by mistake. This would be a major point in the heel turn in about two weeks. Savage is TICKED! Liz comes down to try to straighten things out as Savage offers the handshake to fix things for now. Savage and Liz leave as Boss Man gets in.

He’s about 100lbs heavier than his traditional weight. This began another Rumble tradition of the one on one showdown. These two had been the big feud for a good while and the showdown hadn’t really come yet so this was a pretty big deal. Not surprisingly Boss Man takes over and Gorilla defends Hogan with the somewhat legitimate argument that Boss Man is fresh.

Hogan takes a decent piledriver and eventually gets back to even as the buzzer rings about three and a half minutes after Boss Man came out. And in a SHOCKING, yes SHOCKING I say, turn of events, it’s Boss Man’s partner Akeem. Now here’s something amusing to me where the bias towards the main event is as evident as ever.

Gorilla starts whining and complaining about how DiBiase must have had something to do with this because there’s no way that tag partners could have consecutive numbers and wind up in this position against Hogan. He’s completely backwards there. First of all, this is the third time in this Rumble where partners have come in back to back (Rockers and Brainbusters, which more or less gives away that this isn’t a random draw).

On top of that, how could DiBiase have known that Hogan would have been in there at this moment all by himself? If nothing else, this would prove that DiBiase had nothing to do with it as there is no reason for him to assume that Hogan would have A, been in there already when the Twin Towers came in, and B, that Hogan would be alone.

In order to do that, DiBiase would have had to find out what Hogan’s number was, and the only ways he could have done that would be to find out Hogan’s number directly from Hulk which is unlikely or to have found out all 29 other spots AND managed to spread enough deals around to make sure that Akeem and Boss Man had consecutive numbers after Hogan.

I’m supposed to believe that he managed to pull all this off in less than two hours with the help of just Virgil? Give us some credit there Gorilla. Granted I don’t think he put that much thought into what he said, but that’s the point of these reviews: to break down things like that and show how stupid some stories can be. In a quite anticlimactic moment, Hogan is hit with a double splash and thrown out. Really, that’s all there is to it.

That just came out of nowhere and all of a sudden the fact of how stupid that may have been kicks in. Tell me oh great and mighty Vince: why should I care about the rest of the match? Your top faces are all gone now with about ten entries to go. This wasn’t smart booking at all as they backed themselves into a corner for what is likely going to be a weak finish. Hogan of course pulls Boss Man to the floor and beats on him as Beefcake comes out. It’s a big tag team brawl minus the tagging.

Hogan says he’s going back in and the referees finally do their jobs and keep him from doing so. Hogan pulls Boss Man out AGAIN because this is all about him again, despite him not being world champion or even in the title picture. He and Boss Man fight to the back and they’re going to say Boss Man is out because Hogan pulled him over the ropes. In at 25 we have someone that might even be less useful than Garvin in the Red Rooster.

I finally got the joke/idea behind the name of his finisher the Five Arm. It’s one better than the forearm. Get it? That lowered my IQ a good bit. The announcers try to figure out who the final five guys will be and naturally they know them inside of 4 seconds. The two faces do the generic beating on the heel because that’s Rumble Theory 101. Gorilla actually agrees that Hogan cheated. I never thought I’d hear that.

Barbarian is in next to make what should be a completely one sided match. Barbarian, the genius that he is, beats up the faces and then goes after Akeem on his own. I love idiotic heels. Despite this being 1989, Big John Studd is somehow still a relic here. He goes straight for Akeem in what would become a running theme for the end of this match which I’ll get to in a minute. John is a face here on one last hurrah I guess you would call it.

Basically John keeps throwing people out of his way so it’s just him and Akeem, which can be translated into the guy that he can do the least with while still looking like he’s doing something. Hercules comes in at 28. Just like I thought it would, this has REALLY slowed down since Hogan left and it just doesn’t feel right at all. The next to last entrant is Rick Martel, the returned face who is just about to become a heel and a model.

The final guy is DiBiase to few people’s shock. If he was supposed to be the big heel, two things: one, he should win, and two he should go on to something big after this. At Mania 5 he had a throwaway match with Brutus. Studd is just a complete waste of time out there as he hasn’t actually beaten on anyone other than Akeem. The final eight, all in the ring, are DiBiase, Akeem, Studd, Martel, Red Rooster, Beefcake, Hercules and Barbarian. What a motley crew that is.

Rooster is finally gone and we’re at seven. Studd finally fights someone else in the Barbarian. I don’t believe it. DiBiase and Barbarian put out Beefcake and Hercules to bring us down to DiBiase, Barbarian, Studd, Akeem and Martel. Martel puts out Barbarian and then gets knocked out maybe four seconds later to get us down to three.

The heels double team Studd as I can’t wait for this to end. Akeem is put out after a mistake and we’re down to Studd and DiBiase. He offers money and Studd isn’t interested. After a few power moves, Studd causally throws DiBiase over for the most lackluster ending in the history of the Rumble. Virgil comes in and gets beaten up as well. Wow that was dumb.

Rating: C+. This is the first of its kind in a way so you have to take it with a grain of salt. They didn’t know what they were doing with the thirty man formula, but I just don’t get the point in having Studd win it. I suppose the issue was that they didn’t think it was a big deal yet so they gave it to a random guy like they did last year. That’s the only thing I can think of at least.

The match really suffers at the end though because once Hogan is gone, there’s just no drama or anything at all. Studd winning was almost obvious but not quite. Also, Akeem has been in the final three in both of the first two Rumbles. How insane is that? This was a big improvement over last year, but they still had a lot of bugs to work out. Not bad, but it would be massively improved in the coming years.

In the locker room, Savage goes on a rather long rant about how it was a misunderstanding, but you can see the heel just dying to get out. Liz says that it wasn’t a fight or anything like that. The Mania main event was coming and would be obvious today, but back then it was built up so well that it was shocking.

Gorilla and Jesse say some basic stuff before we get a highlight package to end it.

Overall Rating: C-. Average. That’s the only way to put this. There’s nothing at all here that is going to be considered great by any means, but nothing at all is really all that bad. You’re not going to see anything that rivals Steamboat vs. Savage but there’s nothing here that wouldn’t hold your attention for the most part. This is where the Rumble is still being fleshed out but you can see the elements there that made it such a great concept for a show.

It’s not great and it’s not bad, but a lot of work was needed. For once though you could clearly tell that they had the right idea though and things would be much better next year where they would really get it right. I’d say this show is worth seeing once maybe, but you won’t be missing anything if you don’t see it. If you catch it and have some time to kill you won’t think it was a waste of time but you won’t be thrilled either. Not bad, but nothing great at all.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

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IMG Credit: WWE

NXT UK
Date: December 26, 2019
Hosts: Nigel McGuinness, Tom Phillips

It’s the end of the year and that means we get to look back at some of the better things to go down in 2019. I wouldn’t have believed it when the year started but NXT UK has become one of the better wrestling shows on television and they could have some great offerings on a show like this. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

The hosts welcome us to the show and preview Takeover: Blackpool II.

From Takeover: Blackpool.

Women’s Title: Toni Storm vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is defending. Storm goes after her to start and starts firing off the forearms until a faceplant cuts her off. That’s fine with Storm who hammers away even more, setting up a suicide dive onto a bailing Ripley. They don’t head inside just yet though and Ripley kicks her back first into the barricade. Back in and Ripley stomps away as the loud fans continue to be split.

The bodyscissors stays on the weakened ribs and a delayed vertical suplex gets two. A pair of legdrops gives the champ two but the trash talking lets Storm headbutt her for a double knockdown. The slugout goes to Storm and she rolls some German suplexes but Storm Zero is countered. So is Riptide and they go into a pinfall reversal sequence for two each.

Ripley gets the standing Texas Cloverleaf but gets reversed into the hip attack in the corner. Storm gets frustrated at the kickout and gets caught with Riptide for two, giving us Ripley’s great stunned face. A headbutt lets Storm Zero connect for two and they’re both down again. Storm slugs away with forearms and another Storm Zero gives her the pin and the title at 14:49.

Rating: B-. Kind of a flat and out of nowhere finish as they didn’t really build off the near fall from the first Storm Zero. Storm winning the title so soon after Ripley won it for the first time is a bit of a surprise but you can’t go wrong with either of them as the champion. Tyler Bate winning the inaugural title and dropping it to Dunne has gone just fine and Storm is going to be perfectly fine with the title, as is Ripley without it.

Video on Toni Storm.

Video on Kay Lee Ray.

From Takeover: Cardiff.

Women’s Title: Kay Lee Ray vs. Toni Storm

Toni is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Ray bails straight to the floor so Storm dives onto her, setting up a big forearm to the face back inside. Ray knocks her right back down though and we hit a seated abdominal stretch. Toni goes off with shots to the face and a superkick to put Ray down. A running clothesline can’t set up Storm Zero so its’ a Code Red for two instead.

Now Storm Zero connects for two so Ray is right back with her own superkick. The Gory Bomb gives Ray her own two so they head up top. Neither can hit a super version of their finisher so Toni grabs a release German suplex for two more. Storm gets sent outside so Ray hits a top rope flip dive for a nasty landing, sending the referee down to check on them. Back in and the Gory Bomb onto the top rope sets up a regular Gory Bomb to give Ray the title at 9:58.

Rating: C. This felt sloppy and rushed, the latter of which is probably true due to it not getting that much time. Storm didn’t have a lot of life or fire here and it was causing some issues. Ray winning is a good thing as Storm had held the thing long enough but I was hoping it was in a better, or at least bigger feeling, match.

Video on Piper Niven.

Video on Travis Banks vs. Jordan Devlin.

We see the end of the Grizzled Young Veterans becoming the inaugural Tag Team Champions.

From Takeover: Cardiff.

Tag Team Titles: Flash Morgan Webster/Mark Andrews vs. Gallus vs. Grizzled Young Veterans

The Veterans (Zack Gibson and James Drake) are defending and it’s Andrews sunset flipping Gibson for two to start. Drake comes in for a double hiptoss into a standing moonsault/standing flip dive from Andrews and Webster. We settle down to Webster not being able to sunset flip Wolfgang so it’s a six man staredown. The champs are knocked to the floor and a hurricanrana/moonsault takes down Gibson and Coffey.

Back in and a moonsault press gets two on Gibson as the champs are in trouble. He’s right back up with a backbreaker on Webster on the floor with Drake slingshotting down into a forearm to Webster’s chest. Back in again and everything breaks down again with Andrews cleaning house, only to get jumped by Gallus. That means stereo flip dives from the Welsh guys to both other teams and the fans are rather pleased.

Back in and Andrews’ assisted 450 gets two on Gibson, only to have Gallus come back in to start cleaning house. A catapult into a Samoan drop gets two on Andrews but it’s a reverse hurricanrana/running knee strike (cool) for two on Wolfgang. Andrews is back up with a shooting star to take out Gallus and Gibson. As the fans again ask about Vince’s viewing habits, it’s Stundog Millionaire into a Swanton from Webster for two on Gibson. Helter Skelter into the 450 gets two on Andrews, with the crowd literally getting to their feet on the kickout.

The champs and the Welsh guys are all knocked down but it’s Gallus coming back in to clean house. Coffey hits his own big dive to take everyone out, followed by the enziguri into the powerslam for a delayed two on Andrews. Everyone gets back in and Gallus gets beaten down until Webster is catapulted into a Canadian Destroyer on Coffey. Gibson takes Wolfgang to the floor for an electric chair, with Drake adding the suicide clothesline for a Doomsday Device.

That means the big showdown between the champs and Andrews/Morgan with the Welsh guys getting the better of it. Webster hits a 630 on Drake with Gibson making the save. Andrews tries to dive on him but gets hit in the throat on the way down. Back in and Ticket to Mayhem hits Webster but Drake goes to deal with Gallus. That lets Andrews come in with Fall to Pieces to Gibson to give Webster the pin and the titles at 20:10.

Rating: B. This was WAY too long and felt like it just kept going and going. That being said, there were some very good near falls and some awesome near falls before the perfectly done feel good moment at the end. If you cut off five minutes, it’s even better, but the length held it back a lot. Andrews and Webster winning is completely the right call though and it felt like a special moment.

Video on Dave Mastiff.

Video on Dave Mastiff vs. Jordan Devlin in their Falls Count Anywhere match.

Devlin promises a bigger 2020 because he’s the MVP of 2019.

The announcers talk about Devlin.

Video on Ilja Dragunov vs. Cesaro.

We look at some of the rising stars.

From October 24.

Noam Dar vs. Trent Seven

They’ve been annoying each other for weeks. Dar’s towel says RIP STRONG STYLE. Dar jumps him on the floor during Seven’s long entrance and uses the towel to tie Seven to the post. That means a dropkick to drive the arm into the post as we’re still waiting on the opening bell. Seven gets in and insists that he can go so Dar charges at him, right into a hard lariat for two. A legdrop gives Seven two but Dar slips out of a Burning Hammer and snaps Seven’s bad arm across the top rope.

The arm is fine enough to snap off a Rock Bottom out of the corner but Dar kicks him off the top. The crash makes Seven scream in pain and a fisherman’s suplex gives Dar two. A snapmare into the ropes gives Dar two and it’s time to start stomping at the leg. With the fans chanting something about Alicia Fox, Dar grabs something like an STF with a bend of the fingers and a shout about how much he loves Pete Dunne.

Back up and Seven blocks a Tyler Driver 97 but gets his leg kicked out again. Something close to a snap dragon suplex sends Dar outside for a change and Seven nails the suicide dive. The spinning moonsault misses though (partially due to the knee being banged up) but Seven’s Michinoku Driver gets two instead. Dar is right back with the ankle lock, sending Seven rolling over to the rope.

They fight to the apron with Seven getting in a DDT to drop Dar on his head. That’s only good for two as well so Seven dedicates this one to Tyler, setting up the Seven Star Lariat for two more. Seven is fired up but Dar kicks the knee out and hits a top rope double stomp to the leg.

The ankle lock with the grapevine goes on so Seven has to flail a lot, eventually making it over to the rope. Dar grabs the towel before kicking Seven in the head, ala Pete Dunne, for two more. The trash talk goes on so Seven bends the finger back, gets in the punch to the face and hits the Birminghammer (if that’s not what Tom said, it should be) for the pin at 13:10.

Rating: B. Yeah that worked. This is the kind of match that Seven hasn’t had very often so giving him the fighting from behind win, which also tying in the stuff with the rest of British Strong Style, worked very well. Dar is very easy to dislike and it’s even better watching Seven literally hit him in the face and drop him on his head for the win. This felt like a definitive win and a statement win for Trent, which was exactly what he needed to do.

Video on Pete Dunne vs. Walter.

Video on Tyler Bate vs. Walter. That’s still my Match of the Year.

Joe Coffey is ready to take the title from Walter at Takeover.

One more Blackpool rundown wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B. This is the kind of show that works very well in this spot. Takeover is coming up soon and WWE needs to promote it as well as they can. Giving us a look at the show and looking at everything else while saying “here’s what you can expect” is a smart move and I liked this show rather well. Good stuff here from a very good promotion.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

You don’t see many of these but it’s cool that it still takes place.

Andrade beat Rey Mysterio to win the US Title. This is a surprise but not completely out of the blue as it’s the biggest house show of the year and Rey should be banged up after Monday’s beatdown. I can go for this and you can all but guarantee a rematch either on Raw or at the Royal Rumble.

Thoughts?

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 1988
Date: January 24, 1988
Location: Copps Coliseum, Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 18,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

So as I said, this is the first of the Rumbles and it aired on live TV instead of on Pay Per View. The battle royal tonight is twenty men instead of thirty and we also have three other matches on the card on top of that. We also get a bench press demonstration from Dino Bravo (just go with it) and the contract signing for Hogan vs. Andre II at the first live Main Event which would happen in twelve days. In a KB related story, I would happen in about ten days. Let’s get to it.

Vince does the intro over what I thought was Rude’s music. Oh it was Rude’s music. No wonder they sounded alike.

Rick Rude vs. Ricky Steamboat

This should work well with a career face vs. a career heel. That’s another thing you never get anymore: matches for the sake of having a match. You know what? It could work today too. For the sake of simplicity, Rick will only be used for Rude and Ricky will only be used for Steamboat. Rude pounds away to start but Steamboat fires off chops in retaliation. Rude throws him over the top because he’s still new at this WWF thing. Steamboat skins the cat back in and throws Rude to the floor.

Steamboat does Rude’s pose and Rude complains of a pull of the tights. Back in and Rude wants a test of strength and Dragon, ever the slow one, accepts. Down goes Ricky but he finally hits a knee to the hand to break the grip, followed by a wicked spin out to take Rude to the mat. Steamboat cranks on the arm and does so for a good while. The crowd is pretty much quiet here, so we can hear the individual shouts from fans which give Vince and Jesse something to talk about.

Rude escapes but Steamboat chops him right back down and armdrags him down as only Ricky can do. An elbow puts Ricky down for a bit and Rick pounds away some more. Steamboat comes back with chops and another armdrag into an armbar. More slugging out occurs with chops vs. punches dominating the action. In something you don’t often see, Steamboat seems to botch a spot, resulting in him backing into a knee from Rude and falling (intentionally) to the floor.

Rick sends Steamboat back first into the apron and slams him down as Steamboat is in trouble. There’s a camel clutch by Rude as he finally has a body part to work on. Steamboat taps but that wouldn’t mean anything else for about six years. The referee checks the arm and they make a BIG error as Ricky lets his arm fall three times before stopping it on the fourth drop. Jesse FREAKS as only he can but the match just keeps going. Gotta love that live TV thing right?

Anyway Steamboat stands up and drops Rude on his back to put both guys down. It’s Steamboat up first but a splash hits knees. Back to the chinlock but Ricky makes the ropes and sends Rude into the buckle ten times. A chop to the face gets two and we hit the mat for some technical stuff and a pinfall reversal sequence. By that I mean about five pin attempts each and the crowd is waking up now. Ricky suplexes Rude down but Rude pulls the referee in the way of the cross body. Rude puts on the over the shoulder backbreaker (his move before the Rude Awakening) but it’s a DQ win for Steamboat.

Rating: C. The main issue here was the length. This runs about eighteen minutes and a lame ending didn’t help things either. At least you had two talented guys in there to make the match work a bit better. Still though, cut about five minutes off of this one and it’s WAY better all of a sudden. Steamboat would be gone in just a few months.

It’s time for the bench press lift record attempt. Dino Bravo is doing the lifting (in wrestling gear) and Jesse is spotting. Frenchy Martin, Dino’s manager, is here too. Dino presses 415 to start but first demands complete and utter silence. The 415lbs are easily lifted ten times. We’re going for over 700 by the end so this may take awhile. Next up is 505, which I believe is what Yokozuna weighed when he debuted. That one only goes up eight times as we’re at six minutes spent on this so far.

This time it’s going to be 555. Great this is going to take even more time now. Dino stops to yell at the fans a bit first and now we’re going to the lifting. This one gets about seven reps as this continues to take time. Now it’s 595. They keep talking about a world record, even though there’s no official there to confirm this is happening or anything like that. Wait let’s yell at the fans some more before he lifts it three times. We’re at ten minutes now.

Jesse yells at McMahon a bit and Bravo takes forever to do 655. Gene doing the used car salesman selling of this segment helps a bit due to how over the top and ridiculous it is. Now they go for 715, but the record would be unofficial because the bar will have to be weighed later. We stop to yell at the fans of course first though and storms off. As Bravo goes to finish, Ventura reaches down and pulls the bar up. Yep, that’s the actual payoff of over fifteen minutes of this nonsense.

Women’s Tag Titles: Jumping Bomb Angels vs. Glamour Girls

These are real titles (held by the Glamour Girls at this point) which have perhaps the most confusing history ever, as the belts were literally bought and sold between two wrestling companies. Anyway, they’re here now and the Angels (Tateno and Yamazaki) beat the Glamour Girls (Judy Martin and Lelani Kai) in the finals of the Survivor Series match which basically set this up. This is also 2/3 falls.

I’m not entirely sure which is which on both teams but Vince doesn’t even know the names of the Angels at all until someone tells him later on. The Angels immediately charge at the Girls and hit stereo dropkicks to take over. For those of you unfamiliar with the Angels, basically imagine the Hardys before they became poster children for what drugs can do to you but with long hair and wearing one piece female swimsuits.

We start with Kai vs. Yamazaki (the one in pink. Got it) and a knee to the back from Martin gives the Girls control. Yamazaki Matrixes out of a cover and rolls Kai up for two. Off to Tateno for a kind of suplex out of a piledriver position for one. Jesse asks Vince the names of the Bomb Angels and Vince has NO idea. He suggests calling them pink and red. Yamazaki tries a cross body but it literally bounces off the shall we say rotund Martin.

Off to Kai again so Yamazaki knees her down before bring Tateno back in. Both Angels fire off forearms to take Kai down and there’s an Octopus Hold (a freaky kind of abdominal stretch from Japan) from Tateno. The Angels put on stereo figure fours before it gets down to just Tateno on Kai. There’s a legdrop between the legs ala Jeff Hardy but instead Tateno spreads her own legs to spread Kai’s into the splits as well.

Yamazaki hooks something like a Sharpshooter while being off to the side of Kai. That’s incredibly painful looking and I don’t think I’ve ever seen it otherwise. The Angels get in a tug of war over Kai with Martin losing the war. Martin makes a tag but it doesn’t count because her feet weren’t on the apron. There’s a rule you never see enforced. Not that it matters as there’s the regular tag anyway. Martin comes in and beats on Tateno a bit before hitting a falling backwards facedrop out of a powerbomb position for the first fall. Big Show called that the Alley Oop if it wasn’t clear.

Martin pounds on Tateno after the break but Tateno bridges out in the Matrix move from the mat. Martin misses a splash and there’s Yamazaki again. A middle rope clothesline puts Martin down for two as Vince knows the Angels’ names now. The Angels cause some heel miscommunication but Martin loads up the same move that won her the first fall. In a classic example of PSYCHOLOGY, Tateno rolls through it into a sunset flip for the second fall this time. See? She LEARNED over the course of the match. That shows thinking, which is psychology! It’s not that hard! She slipped a bit on the flip but I’ll forgive it this time.

The third fall begins with a double clothesline from the Angels for two on Kai but Lelani pounds away on her in retaliation. Off to Martin who blocks a fisherman’s suplex and escapes a backslide out of the corner. A slingshot sends Yamazaki into the wrong corner and double teaming gets two on her.

Off to Tateno who is thrown around even more than Yamazaki was. Tateno comes back with a pair of release atomic drops minus the knees and it’s off to Yamazaki for a top rope knee for two. A double underhook suplex gets two on Kai but a senton backsplash misses for Tateno. With Kai trying to get in, the Angels hit stereo missile dropkicks on Martin for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B. For the late 80s and women’s wrestling, this was off the charts. The Angels are every bit as good as any male cruiserweight not named Mysterio you’ll ever see and when they’re against people like the Girls, their skills are shown off even better. This was beyond state of the art for this time period and is still amazing today. Check these chicks out and you won’t be disappointed.

We recap Hogan vs. Andre at Wrestlemania by getting the opening minute or so which saw Hogan trying the slam and Andre getting a “controversial” two count. Andre wants a rematch and has been sold to DiBiase, who wants to buy the world title. Andre showed how evil he was by attacking Hogan on SNME and easily choking him down, setting up the rematch in about two weeks and a match which drew an INSANE 15 rating on LIVE national TV on NBC. Today Vince would lose his mind at a 5 on cable, so this was unthinkable back then.

Oh and now we get the contract signing between Andre and Hogan on tonight’s show for the match on February 5 in Indianapolis. DiBiase is here too as Jesse points out how stupid the fans are for cheering for a song called Real American here in Canada. Even Jack Tunney is here. For those of you unfamiliar, picture Johnny Ace if he wasn’t dripping with charisma.

Gene actually calls Andre Mr. Roussimoff here, which you NEVER hear on WWF TV. Andre won’t sit down and then he won’t sign. Hogan signs but Andre wants to read the whole thing first. One thing to note: Gene has probably said the date of the match about ten times. It’s so simple yet so effective. Andre signs and beats up Hogan for fun to end this after a LONG time.

Jesse and Vince talk about the Rumble and say that if you go over the top, it doesn’t matter where your feet touch because you’re out. I’m assuming that means you have to hit the floor but it’s not exactly clear.

Royal Rumble

Okerlund explains the rules and the intervals are every two minutes here. If you don’t know the Rumble rules, you have no business reading this. It’s a battle royal, people come in every two minutes, there are 20 people in it (this year only) last man standing wins. #1 is Bret Hart and #2 is Tito Santana, and wouldn’t you know it their tag teams are feuding right now. I mean what are the odds?

They slug it out to start with no one having any kind of advantage. Bret finally takes him down and heads towards the rope as Butch Reed comes in at #3. This is a different kind of Rumble as heels don’t fight heels and faces don’t fight faces yet. They just kind of work together as you would expect them to. Tito is almost thrown out by Reed but he escapes and beats on both heels for a bit.

It’s Neidhart in at #4 as not a ton is happening so far in this match. This leaves Santana more or less down 3-1 and everyone pounds away on him. The clock is pretty lenient so far as there’s no way they’re going two minutes between each of these entrants. We get some slow triple teaming and after a choke on the ropes, here’s Jake Roberts in at #5 to quickly toss out Reed. We’ve got Roberts/Santana vs. the Hart Foundation which is quite the tag match when you think about it.

The Harts get beaten down and then thrown into each other but Neidhart breaks up the DDT. Bret piledrives Santana down and Harley Race is in at #6. The crowd is staying way into this which is a good sign for the future. Things kind of slow down a bit as the faces and heels beat on each other for a little while. Here’s Jim Brunzell at #7 to make it a six man tag for all intents and purposes.

Roberts goes EVIL by pulling on Neidhart’s beard. Only Reed has been eliminated so far. The good guys are in control at the moment with Race almost being thrown out. Here’s Sam Houston, Jake’s real life half brother, coming in at #8 to beat on everyone in sight. Well every heel at least. The Harts finally get together and throw out Santana to get us down to six people in the ring.

After about 90 seconds, here’s Danny Davis at #9. To be fair he’s barely a jobber so it’s not like this is going to give the heels any significant advantage. Oh wait he’s fighting Sam Houston so yeah, the heels are in control. Race gets caught in the ropes and Jake keeps knocking him back and forth in a funny bit. Davis tries to kick Jake and gets his leg caught, followed by a suplex from Roberts.

Danny escapes a DDT as we get Boris Zhukov at #10, maybe 80 seconds after Davis came in. Things continue to go slow as we’re trying to build up to a regular battle royal. Race goes after Boris in the first instance of heel vs. heel in this match. Race and Hart double team Brunzell for a bit as this continues to be slow. Don Muraco comes out as #11 but Nikolai Volkoff follows him out, apparently thinking he’s #11. Now there’s a story you don’t see that often but which could work.

Brunzell puts out Zhukov and apparently Nikolai is going to be #12 in a few moments. After way too long of nothing happening, Nikolai is officially #12. Brunzell is put to the apron but gets back in just as Race is eliminated by Muraco. We’ve got eight in there at the moment, which would be Hart, Neidhart, Roberts, Brunzell, Houston, Davis, Muraco and Volkoff. Race won’t leave ringside so as Duggan comes out at #13, he beats Race up on the way. This would lead to one of those so ridiculous it’s hilarious moments at the Slammys.

Duggan goes right after Neidhart because HE wants to be the Jim in this match. The place is way into him too so the crowd reaction is good. After maybe a minute here’s Ron Bass at #14. Volkoff dumps Brunzell as Jake and Neidhart collide. The clock gets even shorter as B. Brian Blair is #15. There are way too many people in the ring now. Everyone fights everyone as Hillbilly Jim is #16, and the fourth person in this match named Jim. He also dumps out Jim Neidhart to empty the ring a tiny bit.

Dino Bravo is #17 as Bass dumps Houston. Back to slow motion mode with everyone pounding on people near the ropes without really doing much. Ultimate Warrior (doesn’t mean anything yet) is #18 and Bret is FINALLY put out by Don Muraco. I timed this next one, and the One Man Gang comes out at #19, 53 seconds after Warrior. They’re not even trying here. Gang immediately pounds on Roberts so Warrior jumps on the big man’s back. This is WAY before he would have been able to slam him anyway.

Gang dumps Blair and Roberts in about ten seconds, which is the best thing that could happen in this match. The Junkyard Dog is #20, giving us a final group of Davis, Volkoff, Muraco, Bass, Hillbilly Jim, Dino Bravo, Ultimate Warrior, Gang, Duggan and Dog. Hillbilly and Gang hammer on each other as Duggan puts Volkoff out. Gang tosses Hillbilly as Bravo and Davis double team Duggan. This ends badly for Davis as Duggan dumps him to a BIG pop.

Bravo and Gang dump the Warrior as we’re down to six pretty quickly. Bass jumps the Dog and tosses him to get us down to five. Muraco dumps Bass and we have a final four of Muraco, Gang, Duggan and Bravo. Gang splashes Duggan in the corner, leaving Muraco to have to fight off both guys. He even takes Frenchy Martin down with a dropkick, only to have Gang clothesline him out to get us down to three.

Jim gets double teamed for awhile and Bravo drops an elbow on him. The same clothesline sequence the heels tried earlier backfires and Bravo gets clotheslined out. Duggan pounds on Gang in a Mid-South reunion but a single shot from Gang takes him down. Gang beats on him next to the ropes, so Duggan low bridges him to win the first Royal Rumble.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where the words “well, they tried” come to mind. That’s the best way to put this match: they didn’t really know what they were doing yet, but they tried. The lack of star power hurt this one as only Duggan and maybe Dog were big names here. It wouldn’t be until next year when the star power came into this and it became a main event thing. Still though, it’s certainly not a bad match and they would get better as time went on.

We recap (see? It even happened back then) the contract signing from earlier tonight.

Hogan is in the arena (in jeans, which is a weird image for some reason) and says that he wants Andre. Standard hype interview for a big match but it’s Hogan in the late 80s so you know it’s awesome.

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Another 2/3 falls match here just to fill in the final part of the show. The Islanders have recently kidnapped Matilda and are recently back off suspension for returning the dog. Tama and Powers (It’s Haku/Tama vs. Jim Powers/Paul Roma) start things off and no one can get a real advantage in the early going. The Stallions beat on Tama a bit, with shots to the head for some reason, before it’s Haku in off the tag.

A cross body gets two for Roma and the Stallions work on the arm for awhile. Off to Tama who gets in like one shot before we cut to a camera angle from over the announcers shoulders. That’s a new one. Powers gets caught by a double headbutt and Haku hammers away on him some more. This continues to go nowhere so I think out of boredom it’s off to Roma vs. Tama.

Roma dropkicks Tama down but Haku low bridges Roma, sending him to the floor and injuring the knee. That’s good enough for a countout for the first fall and the Stallions take Roma to the dressing room to get his knee looked at. In other words, we need a reason to show the contract signing again and let Andre talk a bit. Just like Hogan, Andre doesn’t have much to say but it hypes up the Main Event.

Back to the match after the promo, the recap and a pair of breaks and it’s basically Powers in a handicap match now. You can see big gaps of seats where fans have left. For this one, I can’t say I blame them. Powers dropkicks him down and we hear about Giant-A-Mania from Jesse. Off to Tama who pounds away even more and kicks out of a small package at two. Tama’s jumping back elbow takes Powers down and it’s a little Samoan trash talk for good measure. Haku’s dropkick gets two and there’s a gutwrench suplex for two more.

It’s off to an abdominal stretch but Powers finally hiptosses out of it to get a breather. Haku misses a splash and things slow down again, but there’s no one for Powers to tag because of Roma’s knee injury. Roma finally tags himself in and Haku casually kicks the leg out to take over. Jesse wishes that was Vince’s knee because that’s the kind of guy he is. Tama puts on a half crab and the referee stops it.

Rating: D. This match is a victim of its spot on the card. The problem here is that everything else is done and this was the textbook definition of filler. It’s hard to care about something like this when there’s no story and no interest in this match, and on top of that it wasn’t even anything decent. This is one of those matches though where you can’t blame a lot of the problems on the wrestlers.

Jesse and Vince chat a bit about what we saw to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s one major thing to keep in mind about this show: it was on free TV. On PPV, this would have been bad, but to be fair they had no idea what they were going for here so anything good, which a lot of stuff on here was, was a surprise. This was a decent entry into the show, but they did WAY better next year when they had an idea what they were doing. Good first effort though.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 1988
Date: January 24, 1988
Location: Copps Coliseum, Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 18,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

Here we go with the first ever Rumble. This wasn’t actually on PPV but rather a special on USA, similar to Saturday Night’s Main Event in a way. The idea was invented by Pat Patterson, and that’s about all there is to say on that aspect of it. Since this was a TV special, it only has four matches on it, which to be fair is the same amount on the first Survivor Series. The Rumble here has twenty men in it, most of which are midcard guys.

There are two other things going on with this show other than the matches. First of all we have a contract signing for Hogan and Andre II, which took place two days after my birthday. Also, Dino Bravo is going to try to bench press 715lbs, which would be a world’s record. With all that said, let’s get to the first ever Royal Rumble, which certainly is a historic thing when you think about it.

Vince and Jesse talk about the show, which sounds ok at best, but that doesn’t really mean a lot.

Rick Rude vs. Ricky Steamboat

This was a great feud in WCW in about four years, but it never took off in the WWF for some reason. Ricky, not Rick mind you, would be gone very soon. He wanted time off to be with his newborn son, but it didn’t happen so he went to WCW and had some of the best matches of all time with Ric Flair. So Ricky and Rick are fighting here before Ricky leaves to go fight Ric. I’m glad we’ve got that cleared up.

Rude just got here recently, so there’s very little known about him. I’ll never get tired of seeing Steamboat skin the cat. It just looks awesome every single time. Ventura always seemed like he had a man crush on Rude, which was just funny to me. There’s really no point to this match other than just having a match for the sake of having a match, which isn’t something I agree with but it’s fine I suppose.

You have two great wrestlers so it means the match should be good. It’s classic 80s heel vs. face stuff, so what more do you want. That being said, this is fairly boring to start. It’s fine from a technical standpoint, but it’s a bit bland. Dragon’s armdrags help that out though, as I could watch him do those all day. Granted I’d be bored out of my mind doing so, but I could do it. Steamboat is really good at being able to keep the crowd into a very standard match.

That’s a talent that very few people ever could have, and Steamboat is one of the best ever at it. I mean, he’s working on the arm of Rude, which is some of the most standard stuff you can do and he’s making it interesting looking at least. He’s doing mainly arm work and the crowd is reacting to it. That’s all you can ask for. During this first part of the match we keep hearing a woman’s voice over and over again.

It’s not something that’s supposed to be there either. Jimmy Hart never managed Rude, at least not that I can remember, and Steamboat’s wife who occasionally came to the ring with him, so I have no clue who that is. However, once a camera swings around, we see that a woman has brought a bullhorn with her, more commonly known as a megaphone. Oh this is going to be a long match isn’t it?

And now this is just getting boring. It’s going on way too long here and Steamboat just botched taking an elbow BADLY. I mean it looked horrid, which isn’t something I can ever remember saying about him. I want to hurt that woman with the megaphone. Oh look, it’s ANOTHER armbar, but the fans are cheering it to an extent. At least there’s some psychology being used and he’s adding in more stuff to the arm to switch it up a bit. That’s nice to see.

Now if only the arm plays into the finish later on, we’ll have an actual story being told instead of just most of one which is what happens far more and far too often. Rude can’t pose because of the arm, and the woman thinks it’s just SO funny. The fans really do love Steamboat. They’re cheering wildly for simple punches and chops. That’s saying a lot. Rude goes to the really bad version of a camel clutch.

It’s the kind where he just sits on Steamboat’s back and puts his hands on his face which is supposed to be effective somehow. Thankfully that lasts about ten seconds. Oh never mind it’s back on. Dang I can’t stand cock teases like that. Steamboat slaps the mat which would be considered a tap out today, but obviously this is way too early for that. Rude really wasn’t that good at this time in his career.

He’s rather young and doesn’t have a lot of stuff in his arsenal and it’s rather boring. Somehow we’re discussing Vince putting his fingers up people’s nostrils. You can tell the announcers are rather bored at this point. This match is relying on rest holds such as this chin lock far too much. Yeah they’re actually still in it. At least with Steamboat he worked on the arm which makes sense.

It takes away the Rude Awakening and while you can argue that the clutch takes away Steamboat’s movement, it’s just boring looking. Ricky (again, not Rick but Ricky) mixed up his offense and used strikes and holds on the arm to at least keep it moving. That’s a major perk if nothing else. To their credit, the crowd has stayed rather hot the whole time. They really did love Steamboat. DANG that bridge was pretty from Dragon.

They speed it up all of a sudden and now it’s good. Steamboat goes up for the cross body but Rude pulls the referee in the way of it. I’m not sure if Rude was using the Rude Awakening yet, as he gets Steamboat up in an Argentinean Body Vice, which is where you put a guy on your shoulder and pull down. Jesse says Steamboat just got a Rude Awakening, so there’s your finisher name.

Rude would be with Heenan by the time Mania rolled around and would be somewhat better. He leaves celebrating but Vince gives away the DQ ending by mistake just before it happens. Nice going BOSS. Rude is a bit angry to say the least as we go to commercial. That’s just weird to say.

Rating: C+. This was something that didn’t need nearly twenty minutes. The problem was in all the rest holds and Rude simply wasn’t ready for a seventeen minute match yet. Steamboat didn’t help things with the arm work, but to be fair Rude forgot about it maybe two minutes after he was done. The crowd was into it, but it was just barely ok. The ending sucked too.

It’s time for the bench press attempt. Ventura talks about what we’re about to see while insulting Gene at the same time. Bravo, the Canadian, gets an interesting reception. We get a promo from his manager, Frenchy Martin. It’s in French naturally so I have no clue what he said and I can’t make fun of him. Since we only have four matches, we have time for a warm up of 415lbs first. Wait, Bravo wants it to be silent.

I’ll give you two guesses as to how that goes. He does the 415 ten times as we set up another 90 to make it 505 as Frenchy talks some more. There’s no angle or comedy angle or anything like that going on here. Bravo is just lifting weights. The fans, shockingly, are booing. He speeds this set up a bit by only doing eight reps of it. Gene is despately trying to make this seem epic and is failing completely.

We’re up to 555 now, and it’s just the same thing: Bravo wants the people to be quiet, he stalls, he lifts it, and more weight is added. What’s the point of this freaking thing? Gene is trying to do like a commentary thing here and it’s dull to no end. Bravo can’t do it because there’s too much noise. Ventura waists more time by saying be quiet and Gene asks for silence. Bravo does about six reps here (they should all be red) and again asks for silence.

This is just idiotic as we’re at about ten minutes. Yes, ten minutes is being wasted on this. Were there no jobbers available for people to squash? It’s 595 this time as Bravo hates noise. Wouldn’t the time here have been better spent in like, a match for Bravo? This is obviously supposed to be used to get him over but it’s not working. I’d assume it would work better with actual wrestling, but I don’t know enough about the finer points of the game I guess.

Again, the same formula is used but this time we have another French promo. He does three reps as Gene says how awesome Bravo is. Who really thought this would be a good idea? Remember there’s no Titantron or anything, so the people can see a spotlight on something, but for the most part they can’t see a stupid thing. We’re at 655 pounds now so at least we’re close to being done.

I love also how there’s no judge or official to determine that this would be a record or anything like that also. The booing is ridiculous now so Ventura and Bravo yell at McMahon, who allegedly was just a commentator at this time so that was odd. Hey he got 655 up! We’re over seventeen minutes now as Jesse says that this is unofficial because the bar will have to be weighed later. So wait, this might not count anyway? Give me a break guys.

This is beyond moronic and has been from the start, but supposed someone hit their head and thinks this is interesting. We don’t even get to know the results until later on? WOW and you people wonder why people popped so huge for Hogan and Savage. They were the only interesting things on these shows. Again: be quiet. He lays down but gets back up once again demanding silence. Oh come on now. He’s walking away now and Martin is trying to calm him down.

Jesse asks the people if they want to see a world record. Crowd: NO! Jesse ignores this of course. They waste a minute getting Bravo calmed down and we’re hopefully at the end of this. Jesse helps him do it by grabbing the bar. He would claim to have gotten it clean with Jesse saying he only put two pounds of finger pressure in it. This went on over twenty minutes, as in longer than the opening match. If anyone can explain the mindset of Vince for doing this, I’ll get you a ham sandwich.

Women’s Tag Titles: Jumping Bomb Angels vs. Glamour Girls

This is 2/3 falls. The Women’s Tag Titles did indeed exist. Much like he did with Moolah’s Title, Vince bought them from the NWA and gave them to the Glamour Girls who allegedly won them in Egypt. I think it was billed as a double main event and shown on a split screen with Patterson winning the Intercontinental Title in Rio. It happened blast it! Anyway, the Glamour Girls are old and annoying, but the Bomb Angles are freaking AWESOME.

At Survivor Series when they destroyed the Glamour Girls, Jesse said they were like watching Savage or Steamboat or Dynamite Kid and he couldn’t be more correct. I’ve made no secret of the fact that I’m not a fan of women’s wrestling, but I’ve been looking forward to this match as I’ve never seen it, so you’ll be getting a legitimate fresh review here from me.

More or less this is just housekeeping at this point, as everyone knows the Angels are winning here. I’m not going to try to spell the Angels’ last names properly time after time, but the Glamour Girls are Judy Martin and Lelani Kai. Only the Angels get entrances. These belts were defended maybe twice or so in the six and a half years they were around and no one noticed when they were retired.

These two are like Lita vs. Moolah or something like that. For the sake of simplicity, the Angels will be named Red and Pink based on their attire. All four are wearing what would be described as one piece swimsuits for attire which aren’t flattering at all. Jesse and Vince are arguing about weightlifting and Jesse implies that Vince has never lifted one. That’s another of those moments that are ironic given what we know now.

Vince doesn’t know the names of the Angels either. OH MY GOODNESS! Vince says for lack of anything better, let’s call one Pink and one Red. I called that first Vince! I don’t care if I wouldn’t be born for another ten days. That was MY idea. That’s either awesome or scary as I’m thinking the same way Vince does. The Angels are just flat out destroying the Glamour Girls here as they look about as worthless as Vince is on commentary.

Dang man at least know the names of your talent. His excuse is he doesn’t speak Japanese. What difference does that make? If I walk into an Italian restaurant I can order spaghetti and I don’t speak Italian. It’s a word and you match it with a color. How hard is that?

Pink using the split legged move that Jeff Hardy used a lot. The Angels remind me of the Hardys actually with their continuity. In a very cool spot, both have a leg of one of the Glamour Girls and pull on her as the other Girl pulls from the other side. The Angels win and the Glamour Girl that’s standing more or less winds up doing a headbutt onto her partner. It looked cool.

The Angels are embarrassing the champions at this point as the Girls more or less can only do bare bones level stuff while the Angels, although a bit sloppy at times, are all over the place with varieties of offense that look very great. Like I said they’re not perfect, but man they’re fun to watch. They’re not boring like most of the women wrestlers around this time period. It’s like the situation in the Winter Olympics a few years ago with the French judge.

One of the teams did a very basic routine perfectly and the other team did a ridiculously hard routine nearly perfectly. As far as execution goes here, the Glamour Girls are likely better, but they’re nowhere near the level the Angels are at here. Jimmy Hart rubbing one of the Glamour Girls’ calves to get the circulation back into it is funny stuff. Oh I almost forgot: the woman with the bullhorn has had it taken away or has been told to stop using it THANK GOODNESS!

The Girls win the first fall using a fairly cool looking move. Martin sets for a powerbomb but instead shoves Red over her head. Big Show used this for awhile which he called the Alley-Oop. We take a quick commercial break between falls and when we come back we ring the bell. I like that. All of a sudden Vince knows the name of the Pink Angel. Well thanks for getting it seven minutes into the match buddy.

She goes for the same finishing move again after a big brawl but Red gets a sunset flip out of it instead to tie us up. We hit another commercial and upon returning we run down the Andre/Hogan contract signing and the Rumble very quickly before the bell rings. I’m most impressed here as the announcers actually talk about the match once the bell rings instead of hyping up the bigger stuff later on.

That’s showing the girls respect which is something you rarely see in today’s product. When the Angels are on offense, this match is interesting. When the Girls are on offense, I want a sharp object to do bad things with. Ah there now it’s interesting again. The Angels hit a double dropkick from the top to win the belts in a cool looking finish. That was nice.

On replay, Jesse is proven correct as he claims that when the Angel went for the cover she hooked the arm of Martin, raising it off the mat so there shouldn’t have been a pin. Vince says that since the shoulder blade was down it counts. I don’t know what to say to that.

Rating: B-. I was expecting to be bored out of my mind here, but they carried this quite well in my eyes. It was fairly clear that these belts were a joke, but if nothing else they gave us something that we very rarely if ever get to see in this era, with that being a fast paced and well done women’s match. This was fun. It was sloppy, but fun.

We hit the recap button on Hogan vs. Andre which I’m sure you all know. In case you’re brand new to wrestling (if you are you’ve picked a most interesting place to start), Hogan and Andre had the biggest match of all time at Wrestlemania 3 in front of 93,173 people, with Hogan successfully defending the title. At one point very early in the match though, Hogan tried to slam Andre but his back gave out and Andre landed on him.

There was a lot of controversy to the count because Hogan literally couldn’t kick out and it looked like Andre had won in 15 seconds. That’s the driving force behind this rematch. McMahon says that he thinks the third mat slap was “the referee shoving himself up to signal that it was a two.” I get that Vince is the face commentator, but THAT’S the best he can come up with? No wonder he was on the verge of bankruptcy so often.

Anyway, DiBiase came into the picture and tried to buy the belt, but Hogan wasn’t interested. Since Hogan said no, DiBiase paid Andre to take out Hogan. DiBiase was so great on the mic and in general it’s terrifying. How did he not get a short run with it? Depending on if you want to believe it, there’s a story out there that says he was supposed to, but due to Honky Tonk Man throwing a monkey wrench into things, that never happened.

The full story of that is in my Mania 4 review if you’re interested, but in essence, the original plan called for DiBiase to hold the belt over the summer of 88, but it would have involved Savage beating Honky for the IC belt. He said no, so Savage got the world title four months ahead of schedule. Basically we recap the entire feud up to this point in a series of videos that take about seven minutes. This feels more like a show for people that are new to the company at this point, which is rather interesting.

After another commercial, we’re in the ring and for some reason they ring the bell for this. I guess it was to get attention, but it was still odd. Gene says what this is for and introduces Hogan for the contract signing for this match which will take place a week from Friday. It was taking place on a live show on NBC on a Friday night. Live TV was a very new idea back then and being on prime time during the week was unheard of.

You can tell it’s a very different wrestling world than it is now. Hogan is wearing jeans. That just looks odd. Jesse makes a great point that Hogan should be booed for coming out to Real American in Canada, but of course he’s worshipped even more. Gene mistakenly says that Andre weighs 425 which confuses Vince for a bit. Jack Tunney is here and gets a very mixed reaction (he was a big time promoter in Canada and had a lifetime job for selling to Vince.

This same deal was in place for Monsoon who owned the Puerto Rico territory of all places) as he should. Andre just looks awesome in his suit where you can see the suspenders holding up his pants. It sounds stupid but for Andre it looks sweet. Heenan has sold his contract for a million dollars and then later in I think 1989 bought it back for a hundred grand. That’s a very sweet deal when you think about it.

There’s a ton of mind games from Andre which has Hogan looking flat out scared. That’s something you hardly ever see. Hogan signs as DiBiase cuts a promo talking down to Hogan which is just awesome. Andre just stares at Hogan before signing which is rather intimidating. Andre signs and then beats up Hogan of course, because it wouldn’t be wrestling without it. This was a new idea so the cliché isn’t there yet, making it much cooler.

Buy Wrestlemania 4.

We talk about the Rumble, which sounds really weak. There’s not a lot of huge names in it, which kind of hurt things. Let’s do it.

Royal Rumble

Bret Hart is #1 and Tito Santana is 2, so if nothing else we’re guaranteed a solid opening. This was the hot feud for the tag belts at the time, so I’m quite shocked that these are the two opening guys. Bear with me on this, as I have no idea how this is going to go. And we’re off. Vince is complaining about Andre and DiBiase’s conduct, saying that if Andre wins the title it’ll be a dark time for the company. I agree.

Those 45 seconds were indeed a nightmare come to Stamford. Thankfully Jesse gets Vince talking about the match and mentions how ironic it is that these two are starting, which amuses me. Something I noticed here: Vince mentions that hopefully 3 will be one of Tito’s friends. This was a lot more of a standard battle royal as there’s no concept mentioned of every man for themselves.

The idea of say Neidhart throwing out Bret would be a split of the team instead of just a regular thing in a battle royal. That’s very interesting. 3 is Butch “I was supposed to be a Horsemen” Reed. Tito hits the forearm just as Butch comes in to make it one on one again. Jesse says that Reed is virtually rested. Why wouldn’t he be all rested? Also if you’ve been resting, doesn’t it imply you had been doing something before? Why am I examining this?

After about a minute and a half (the space between people always changed through the match. According to Wikipedia this match runs 33 minutes even. Now I’m bad at math, but with 19 different entrances considering that two start and two minutes between each, wouldn’t there be a minimum of 38 minutes, which would also assume that the last person out was eliminated more or less immediately and didn’t have to run to the ring) Neidhart is 4, making it three on one against Tito.

Naturally just before Jim gets in, Bret and Butch mess up a double team spot which I think was going to be called the Convenient Plot Twist of Doom, but I could be wrong. The Harts kind of steal Demolition’s finisher to beat on Santana a bit more. Vince finally points out the idea that Reed could double cross them, but naturally he doesn’t.

After about 75 seconds we have the fifth entrant of Jake Roberts who was rapidly becoming a huge name. He’s by far the biggest star in the match at this point and immediately eliminates Reed and then hammers on Neidhart. Jim would be his opponent at the infamous Heroes of Wrestling issue which I’m sure you’ve heard of.

Jake and Tito clean house for a bit as it will never cease to amaze me how a guy can get a beating that would put most people in a hospital and be up fresh and fighting just seconds later. The crowd is WAY into this. The DDT doesn’t hit and the heels are in control again. Bret hits a piledriver on Tito as number six is Harley Race who needed to retire about five years prior to this.

At seven we have Jim Brunzell as we’re in full on battle royal mode of very little happening. This is a white hot crowd which is helping the boredom a lot. All six guys try to get each other out in a big pile which is either very cool or very stupid. Sam Houston, Jake’s tiny and untalented brother in law is eighth. The commentary here has to be limited as it’s really just punching and kicking and a random attempt at an elimination that doesn’t do anything.

That’s the nature of the beast though as you have to fill in a lot of time out there. We have seven people in the ring right now which is far too high of a number. As I type that, the Harts throw out Tito. Danny Davis is ninth. He was a referee turned wrestler and about as effective as Santino. Sam Houston beats him up if that tells you anything. Race gets caught in the slingshot position which is where he sits on the middle rope and gets punched down but his feet save him and bring him back in.

I’ve always liked that one. More random punching follows. These fans REALLY want a DDT. Boris Zhukov is the tenth entrant and eighth currently in the ring. How are we already halfway done with this? He goes for Houston, which makes sense as he’s the tiny guy in the match, but it’s getting a bit repetitive. Race and Boris go at it, and the term every man for himself is first used on a Rumble broadcast. I love me some hot heel on heel action. It had to be said.

Davis tries to get rid of Sam Houston to become mayor of Jobber Town USA, or would it be Jobber Town Canada in the Horowitz province? We start the second half with Don Muraco (incorrectly called #10 by Vince) and Nikolai Volkoff who run down at the same time. Uh oh we have an uninteresting problem here. Muraco hits him and climbs in, making that whole segment completely pointless.

We have WAY too many people in there until Boris is eliminated to take us down to just eight in the ring. That’s still far too many people laying on the ropes and punching each other. I wonder if they ever get bored doing that for so long. Brunzell hits a sweet dropkick on Hart. That was nice. Apparently Nikolai will be 12th when we finally get to him.

After Vince mentions that he has the list of all twenty names, more or less ending any feeling of suspense at least for me, Nikolai comes in, again making the time where he stood at ringside completely pointless. Race does his traditional back flip bump to be eliminated which always looks good.

Jim Duggan comes out 13th to a MASSIVE pop. He and Roberts were likely the second and third biggest faces in the company at this point. He and Race have a short incident in the aisle which I guess is the setup for the hilarious fight they had at the Slammys. Find that show as it’s hilarious stuff all night long.

There are WAY too many people in there with I think nine at this point and for some reason they’re all on one side of the ring. That looks very odd indeed. Ron “Don’t Call Me Lance” Bass comes in and I promise that’s the last of my Chris Berman moments. I can’t stand that guy. I like the way Duggan punches. It just looks cool. The ring is too full but Brunzell being thrown out helps a bit.

Brian Blair is 15 to get us down to just five people to go. These fans sound like they’re heroin addicts given how much they want the DDT. After even more stalling and bad punching we have Hillbilly Jim at sixteen. He takes out Anvil in about four seconds to keep us at that ten person equilibrium. Dino Bravo gets us to 11 as number 17 which I think is a new record for most people in the match’s long standing twenty minute history.

That’s the problem here. Considering the whole match is thirty three minutes, Bravo should be coming in at thirty two I believe, yet we’ve got three more to be entered. Bass gets rid of the pest known as Sam Houston. The match becomes legal when some rookie that hasn’t done anything yet known as the Ultimate Warrior comes in. He’s a jobber killer at this point and barely even that high up.

Bret finally goes out as I guess he couldn’t stand to be in there with someone as bad as Warrior. He was in there twenty five minutes which is the record at the time. About forty seconds after Warrior comes in we have One Man Gang who would win the Slammy for Best Group. He knocks out Roberts and Blair in about a minute to finally start clearing the ring up a bit. The final man comes out after about a minute and it’s the Junkyard Dog. Well that’s pretty anticlimactic.

For the life of me I will never understand what was so great about this guy. He was supposed to be a big deal but I’ve always found him to be a complete waste of air. Anyway, this is the final field of about nine or ten so let’s do it. Yeah it’s ten. Vince shows off his brilliant wrestling mind by picking the Dog to win it. The 300lb Lithuanian Nikolai Volkoff is the first of the ten out thanks to Duggan.

Gang backdrops Jim out to take up to eight. Gang is also the I think fourth person that Jesse says this is his type of match. We get it: brawlers should do well in this. Davis gets clotheslined out to finish eighth. Gang and Bravo eliminate Warrior about five seconds later with relative ease. Dog is out a bit later to take us to five. Bass’ elimination takes us down to four.

I know that was just listing eliminations but they all came rather quickly with nothing at all between them. The final four are Gang, Bravo, Duggan and Muraco. The announcers pick the Gang for the win. Muraco beats up the Achilles enthusiasts while Duggan is down. Bravo holds Muraco up so Gang can clothesline him out, and naturally…it works. What? Of course it works.

Those are finely trained professionals. Did you expect them to make a mistake or something like that? They try the same spot on Duggan and it fails to take us to Gang and Duggan as the last two. Gang beats on Duggan on the ropes and charges at him, but Duggan of all things uses his head and pulls the rope down for the win.

Jesse is annoyed which is funny. We almost immediately go to commercial. One thing I really liked there was that there were no commercial breaks which would have messed up a lot of stuff for me. I’m glad they did it right.

Rating: C-. This match gets a pass, but it wasn’t that good. To be fair, it’s the very first one and they had no clue what they were doing, so given the information and knowledge they had, this was good. The roster wasn’t huge here as Hogan, Andre and DiBiase were the biggest stars in the company at the time, so there was only so much they could do, but it was certainly watchable. Next year they would iron out a lot of the kinks to improve it greatly, but for a first try this was fine.

We recap the real thing of the show by talking about Hogan and Andre. Hogan comes out again to talk about the title match on the fifth and says exactly what you would expect him to say. This was just window dressing.

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Yes we actually have another match on this show and oddly enough it’s also 2/3 falls. The Islanders had dognapped Matilda recently in a somewhat well known angle. In short, they stole the dog and then gave it back. It was a big deal at the time for no apparent reason. Vince plays Sherlock Holmes here which is idiotic sounding. Heenan is apparently in Barbados for no given reason. Tama and Jim Powers start.

Tama was a guy I’ve always liked but he never got anything going for him. Vince admits that he was bored out of him mind during the Bravo segment which is great. It’s always good to hear Vince admit the he screwed up. They more or less ignore the match for the beginning because the show is more or less over at this point. Vince says that Tama has a devastating leap.

He doesn’t say into a splash or anything like that, but just a devastating leap. Wait, so he has a painful jump? Is he a jump rope master or something? Does Heenan turn the ropes? The man that would somehow become a Horseman named Paul Roma gets a tag and then it’s his turn to get beaten up. Oh dear Roma hurt his knee. No one seems to care. He gets counted out to end the first fall.

We go to commercial and as we come back, the Stallions are in the back getting Roma’s knee looked at. As stupid as that sounds, we get another recap of the contract signing and while a match is going on, we go to Andre and DiBiase for a promo in the arena. That’s just painfully stupid looking.

The commercial is let’s say three minutes long. In three minutes a guy with a bad knee got to the back and DiBiase and the Giant got word to the production team that they wanted to say something and got to the stage in time? That’s a BIG stretch. Andre says exactly what you would expect him to say. He does use the term Giant-a-Mania which is kind of awesome.

After another commercial we’re back in the second fall. Roma’s knee is dead here but we keep going anyway. I’ll give them credit as that’s actually a rather creative way to get in a match and a promo in the final part of the show. It’s kind of plausible but not really. It’s close enough though. Naturally they talk about the promo. You have to give it to Vince: he managed to get a promo in so that he wouldn’t have to talk about this match very much at all.

I’ll give him credit for something up with good ideas like that. That’s not bad at all. Jesse says that the Hogan vs. Andre match will be bigger than the Indy 500. Vince says he’d like to see Jesse dragged behind an indy car. Dang that’s rather violent.

This is just rather generic stuff for the most part as Powers can’t tag out because his partner is hurt. He finally does and Roma is destroyed, giving up to a half crab pretty quickly. Jesse somewhat sarcastically calls it a valiant effort which is I guess his attempt at being nice?

Rating: C-. This booking made little sense as I don’t get why this went on last. It was pretty boring but it’s not bad. It’s standard 80s stuff but it’s little more than a squash. It closed the show on an odd note, but this was ok I guess.

Vince and Jesse recap the show for about three minutes with a very long talk about the Bravo thing. For the love of goodness it wasn’t a big deal! They desperately try to make it a big deal, but man it’s just a failure. They of course recap Hogan and Andre and in a funny close, Jesse goes through the information for the match time and location etc., which disgusts the marketing freak known as Vince. That’s just great.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s a major factor to remember when watching this show: it was completely free. As a pay per view, this would have been lower than an F. However, given that this was pretty much thrown together and was given away free, how much can you complain? You got four matches and six segments total.

The first match was ok I guess, the second was exciting, the third was a new gimmick which is always worth a look and the fourth…well I’m not sure why it was where it was but it’s not bad. The two segments were the epitome of hit and miss as the first was just a waste of time, but to be fair you could just change the channel for this one. The Hogan/Andre was nothing but a build up for next week which is also fine. The one thing I don’t get is where a lot of guys were.

I mean, there’s no IC Champion in Honky. There’s no Savage who would go on to win the world title at Mania. No Demolition who would win the tag titles. Beefcake wasn’t there either and he would get the title shot at Mania. Martel, the other tag champion wasn’t there.

It certainly would have helped the battle royal out, but I guess that’s neither here nor there. The show is fine all things considered, but it’s really more of a historical thing than a good thing. It’s not bad at all, but don’t expect a great show because it isn’t one.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

This is a special day for a lot of people, including me (as you can see).  Regardless of your how you feel about the religious side of the day, Christmas is about spending time with your friends and loved ones, whether it’s a little while or all day.  So take the day off (as you should be allowed to do and I’m sorry if you can’t) and just enjoy yourself with someone who means something to you.  Watch a Christmas movie, play some games, just chill in front of a nice fire and talk all day or whatever else you want to do.  Just spend some time together and if you can, think about what they mean to you because you don’t know when your last Christmas together might be.  It’s my first Christmas without my grandmother and I never would have guessed that last year.  Enjoy the time while you can, because this is a day you get once a year.

I’ll probably be taking the day off but if I don’t do anything new, I’ll throw up something from the vault.

Merry Christmas to all, and too all a good morning, afternoon and night,

KB

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 23, 2019
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Samoa Joe, Vic Joseph

We’re taped this week and that’s quite the good idea as there is no need to have the talent working so close to Christmas. That being said, one of the big ideas over the last two weeks has been to make Seth Rollins into a bigger heel, despite the show taking place in his home state. Tonight he gets a US Title shot because even though he beat Brock Lesnar twice this year and now has the AOP behind him, Brock doesn’t exist until we get closer to the Royal Rumble. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Kevin Owens to get things going. We see a video on Seth Rollins and the AOP joining forces to attack various people. Owens is ready to say something but Mojo Rawley cuts him off. Mojo wants an explanation for Owens Stunning him but Owens wants to start their No DQ match right now. That’s fine with Mojo.

Mojo Rawley vs. Kevin Owens

Owens runs him over to start and throws in a bunch of chairs. Back in and Mojo manages a fireman’s carry faceplant onto said chairs for two. The chairs are set up next to each other and Mojo actually slams him onto them for two more. Since being slammed onto opened chairs doesn’t really hurt, Owens hits a superkick into the Swanton for two of his own. A table is brought in and it’s a Stunner into the Pop Up Powerbomb through the table to finish Rawley at 6:30.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure what to think about this one. They were smart to keep it short because no one was going to buy Mojo as a threat to Owens, but it wasn’t interesting in the first place and the match was just an annoyance for Owens. The No DQ part was just a detail and a way to increase the violence, but it never got interesting or really close to it.

Post match, Owens calls out Rollins and the AOP for a fight. Post break here are Rollins and AOP with Rollins saying a lot of things without having a microphone. He offers a handshake but Owens superkicks him down. That means a beatdown from the AOP though and Rollins is back up for the Stomp. This sends Samoa Joe into a rant about how those aren’t men because they’re just thugs. Someone needs to strike first so you can tell one story.

Over the weekend, R-Truth was in New York City. After being told about the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree, Akira Tozawa rolled him up to win the 24/7 Title. That’s his reward for all of the great performances over the last few weeks?

Cedric Alexander vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley starts throwing him around to start but Cedric manages to roll away. The spinning back elbow rocks Lashley and a headscissors into a dropkick puts him on the floor. A moonsault off the apron drops Lashley again but hold on because Lana says whoa a lot. She gets in the ring and asks Cedric who he thinks he is. How dare he attack Lashley a week before they’re getting married? The invites are going out and Lashley needs to look great, so let’s have a classic Greco-Roman match.

Back from a break with the match continuing as usual, including Alexander kicking Lashley in the face from the apron. The fans chant for Rusev as the springboard Downward Spiral is broken up. A hard clothesline turns Alexander inside out and a neckbreaker gets two. Lashley hits a rather high in the air Downward Spiral for two more but Alexander gets in a dropkick.

The springboard clothesline connects and there’s the suicide dive for a bonus. The big running flip dive makes it even worse and the Neuralizer connects for two. Lashley is right back with the spinning Big Ending but the spear is cut off with a dropkick to the knee. Another springboard misses though and it’s the spinebuster into the spear to finish Alexander at 13:22.

Rating: C. This was your match that was extended to stretch the show out. The Lana/Lashley stuff is as painful television as you can find and I’m almost scared to see how bad the wedding is going to be next week. I would say at least it’s getting closer to a conclusion but there is no reason to believe that any such ending is coming. The match was back and forth but it ran long and the Lana announcement in the middle could have come before or after.

Rollins doesn’t get what Owens is trying to do.

Tozawa (in a 2K19 jacket because even WWE wrestlers don’t want to support the new game) runs into R-Truth again and they bump into someone, causing him to drop his food. The chase continues.

Zack Ryder vs. Drew McIntyre

They trade slaps to start and McIntyre pounds him down in the corner. Ryder sends him outside for a dropkick through the ropes, only to get blasted with a clothesline. Back in and the overhead belly to belly sends Ryder flying and the Claymore finishes Ryder at 2:09. That’s how it should have gone.

Post match Drew beats up Ryder and Curt Hawkins. McIntyre even handles their congratulations to him before saying 2020 is his year.

Here’s Becky Lynch for a chat. She’s a little more serious this time and talks about how things go better when she takes things into her own hands. This company has been trying to protect her but she needs to face Asuka next. Asuka is the only woman that Becky can’t beat so it’s time to collect on one last debt. Cue the Kabuki Warriors to say they are the champions. Asuka calls herself Asuka Two Belts and Becky shouts back in Japanese. The match doesn’t seem to be confirmed yet.

Aleister Black vs. Deonn Rusman

Black vs. Murphy II is set for next week. Leg sweep, jumping knee, Black Mass at 38 seconds.

Buddy Murphy vs. Joeasa

Jumping knee and Murphy’s Law (complete with Buddy pulling him up ala Black for Black Mass) finish Joeasa at 33 seconds.

Post match Black comes back in to hit Black Mass.

Rey Mysterio is ready for Seth Rollins tonight. It’s the first time they’ve ever met, but it’s going to be Rey vs. Seth/AOP. Rey is ready for the AOP to see Seth take the 619 and for him to leave still US Champion.

Tony Nese vs. Ricochet

Nese starts dodging with the flips so Ricochet shows off his own flips. A necksnap across the top rope sets up a bodyscissors to slow Ricochet down some more. Back up and Ricochet kicks him in the face but a springboard is broken up. Not that it matters as the superkick into the Recoil puts Nese away at 2:33. It was energetic while it lasted.

Akira Tozawa hides behind a Christmas tree but then runs away as soon as R-Truth shows up.

Charlotte vs. Chelsea Green

This is Green’s main roster debut and she does the Tessa Blanchard look over the shoulder pose in the ring. They lock up to start with Charlotte going after the arm to start, only to get taken down for a basement dropkick. The chinlock goes on for a bit but Charlotte fights up with the chops. A big boot drops Green and the Figure Eight is good for the tap at 4:06.

Rating: C-. Green looked good and intense but there was only so much you’re going to do with Charlotte. I can’t imagine this is anything more than just a one off match and that’s fine for something like this. They have to fill in the time with something so doing it this way is as good as anything else.

Santa Claus punches Tozawa and wins the title. He runs off so Truth and Tozawa are going to work together to get the title back.

Liv Morgan talks about being young, impressionable and anything but typical.

Randy Orton/Viking Raiders vs. OC

Fallout from last week’s main event. Ivar shoves Anderson into the corner to start and it’s off to Erik for a slam of his own. An Ivar knee gets two on Anderson and Erik slams Ivar onto him for two. Gallows comes in for a change of pace and kicks Erik in the head to put him on the floor. AJ gets in a cheap shot and it’s Erik in trouble for a change. The jumping knee gives AJ two and it’s Anderson grabbing the chinlock.

This one doesn’t last long though as Anderson goes with the spinebuster for two instead. Erik gets in a forearm to AJ though and the hot tag brings in Orton. Gallows doesn’t waste time in backdropping him to the floor though and Orton’s already banged up knee is hurt again. The big staredown on the floor takes us to a break and we come back with Gallows working on the knee some more.

Orton fights up and brings Erik back in for the tag so house can be cleaned. Ivar is in rather quickly for a side slam and basement crossbody. Erik drives Ivar into Anderson in the corner and the Viking Experience gets two with Gallows making a save. Orton comes back in off a blind tag as AJ sends the Vikings outside. The RKO is broken up so Anderson takes one instead. Gallows goes after the knee though and it’s the Phenomenal Forearm to put Orton away at 14:01.

Rating: C. This was a bit boring but it tied into last week and gives us a reason to see both matches again. I could go for more AJ vs. Orton as their match last week wasn’t too bad but the Vikings vs. the OC isn’t exactly thrilling. As long as the AOP is walking around, it’s hard to buy anyone else as a major threat to the titles. At least we had something to fill in some time here though, which was part of the point.

A sleigh race breaks out in New York before Santa runs away on foot again.

Erick Rowan has a present for the camera in his cage.

The Street Profits don’t know why they haven’t gotten their wedding invitations. They could go for the bachelor party though. On top of that, they aren’t sure what’s in Rowan’s cage.

Erick Rowan vs. ???

The jobber offers a candy cane before going after the cage. Rowan takes part of the covering off of the apron and drops him face first onto the exposed….canvas. A crossbody sets up the Iron Claw which sets up the Iron Claw for the pin at 2:21. Same as always.

Rowan gives the candy cane to whatever is in the cage.

R-Truth gets the title back so here’s Tozawa….but the referee is sick of this and goes home. They agree to a truce and to go find the Big Apple.

Here’s Rusev for a chat. Yeah he lost at TLC and he’s upset about it. He’s not upset about Lana and Lashley getting married though because it’s the greatest day of his life. Marrying Lana is the greatest punishment he can give Lashley and the wedding is on RUSEV DAY.

Rusev vs. No Way Jose

The Machka kick gives Rusev the pin at 36 seconds.

Post match Rusev busts out a Spinarooni and leaves with the Conga Line. Rusev even gets some kisses, sending him into more dancing.

Seth Rollins is going to win the US Title and establish dominance.

US Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Seth Rollins

Mysterio is defending and Rollins has the AOP. Side note: Rollins no longer has BEASTSLAYER on his Titantron (not sure how long it has been gone but it was there the night after Survivor Series). Good, as that had nothing to do with what he is doing at the moment and involved one feud that hasn’t been active since August. Rollins starts fast but Rey slips out of a suplex attempt. A discus forearm knocks Rey silly so he’s right back with a headscissors.

The 619 misses though and Rey is sent shoulder first into the post. He’s also thrown hard to the floor as we take a break. Back with Rey fighting out of an armbar and sending Rollins outside. That means a sliding sunset bomb into the barricade, setting up the springboard seated senton. A tornado DDT gives Rey two but Rollins scores with the buckle bomb and a low superkick for his own two. The Stomp misses though and Rey hits the 619, only to have the AOP interfere for the DQ at 9:53.

Rating: C+. This was the kind of action that you would expect from these two but the ending saves the big match for another date. It might be an annoying way to end the show but that was the right way to go here. Mysterio can fight Rollins another day, perhaps when he has some more backup. I could go for more and that’s what they were trying to get the fans to want.

Post match the beatdown is on and they go to the announcers’ table. Joe stays in his seat though and doesn’t like being told to move. If he gets up, it isn’t going to be to move. Joe gets up so Rollins gets in his face, meaning the jacket comes off. Rollins walks away but tells the AOP to finish him. The beatdown is on and Joe gets taken out as Rollins Stomps Rey. The AOP puts Joe through the table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I could go for more of these squash heavy shows. You can only get so far with the long matches as a lot of fans are going to get sick of the matches that feel like they’re going on forever. If nothing else, how many people are going to stick around because “oh well it’ll be something different in a minute”? It’s a change of pace and that’s what Raw has been needing for a long time. We also get some fresh blood on the show and maybe something can click. Not a great show, but the format made it feel a lot faster and that’s a good thing.

Results

Kevin Owens b. Mojo Rawley – Pop Up Powerbomb through a table

Bobby Lashley b. Cedric Alexander – Spear

Drew McIntyre b. Zack Ryder – Claymore

Aleister Black b. Deonn Rusman – Black Mass

Buddy Murphy b. Joeasa – Murphy’s Law

Ricochet b. Tony Nese – Recoil

Charlotte b. Chelsea Green – Figure Eight

OC b. Viking Raiders/Randy Orton – Phenomenal Forearm to Orton

Erick Rowan b. ??? – Iron Claw

Rusev b. No Way Jose – Machka Kick

Rey Mysterio b. Seth Rollins via DQ when AOP interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Ring of Honor Wrestling

Ring of Honor
Date: December 18, 2019
Location: Express Live, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Colt Cabana
Host: Ian Riccaboni

We’re at the end of the year now and that means things are going to be….well pretty much just a placeholder show. With Final Battle out of the way and the holidays upon us, this is going to be an unrelated show, which likely means a bunch of stuff from their multitude of Honor Club shows. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Everything tonight is from Unauthorized.

Clips of Jefe Cobbo/El Villainisto vs. Delirious/Mini Delirious with Mini Delirious taking the fall to get unmasked as Swoggle. Yeah Unauthorized wasn’t the most serious show. Colt Cabana: “It’s Little John Studd!”

Ian welcomes us to the show and explains the idea of Unauthorized: it’s a comedy show, though he doesn’t actually use those words.

Cheeseburger/Bouncers vs. Dalton Castle/Flip Gordon/Kenny King

That would be Cheeseburger/Double Cheeseburger/Triple Cheeseburger vs. Dalton White Castle/Burger Flip Gordon/Kenny Burger King to give you an idea of what we’re doing here. Gordon tags himself in to start with Beer City Bruiser, with the waistlock going as badly as you would expect. A big chop puts Gordon down and it’s time for the snap jabs into the toothless bite. Castle and King get the lack of teeth as well so it’s off to King vs. Cheeseburger (with the hat).

Some armdrags make Cheeseburger lose the hat so King takes bite out of the thing. Back up and Cheeseburger takes King’s leg out and climbs onto his back to bend the arm a bit. We take a break and come back with Cheeseburger in trouble and Castle drawing in Milonas so a lot of stomping can ensue. Gordon does the same thing to Bruiser and Milonas and it’s a triple stomp because the Bouncers aren’t that bright.

Actually the referee catches them and in the argument, Cheeseburger crawls through the legs and makes the tag to Milonas. Eh point for a clever idea. Gordon dives into a swinging sitout Boss Man Slam, setting up Bruiser’s middle rope splash for two. The Bouncers help Cheeseburger on a Canadian Destroyer to Gordon but a rope grab breaks it up. We get the big fight over the superplex until the Bouncers suplex all three of them at once.

King hits an Arabian press onto a bunch of people on the floor and it’s Cheeseburger, Bruiser and Cheeseburger fighting on the stage. Cheeseburger gets thrown onto the pile and Gordon teases a dive, only to flip off the crowd. Bruiser does the dive instead and it’s Cheeseburger hitting a palm strike on Castle, only to get rolled up by Gordon for the pin at 14:05.

Rating: C. Yeah this isn’t something that hasn’t been done better before, but doing this at a show like this is fine. It’s designed to be a comedy match and they weren’t hiding that, which helps a lot. This is something that’s ok to do when you’re in on the joke and that was the case here.

Clips of the ten man tag, which included Ian Riccaboni, a referee, a cameraman and Gary Jester teaming with Colt Cabana to win a glorified handicap match.

Brian Zane’s Top Five of the week looks at the best managers with Truth Martini at the top. Makes sense as there aren’t a lot of big managers to pick from around here.

TK O’Ryan comes out in street clothes and talks about being hurt by Vinny Marseglia and Matt Taven. They’re not his friends but he’s been associated with them for a long time. Last night Marseglia put an end to the team and he wasn’t brought in to the party. A few years ago, O’Ryan was brought in cold with no fanfare and two months later, he was a Six Man Tag Team Champion. He loves this company and there is a better way.

The last few weeks have been very difficult for the three of them but if you go back a few months, there is something he never told anyone in wrestling: he had a head injury and people started passing him by. He feels like a horse without a stable and he isn’t sure if he’ll ever wrestle again. It’s true that he hasn’t been the nicest guy but people can change. He has been receiving a bunch of messages from fans, who are the biggest supporters in the world and he’ll never forget that.

This may be his only chance to say thank you and that is what he wants to do right now. If he’s ever able to wrestle again, he’ll be back as a man that everyone can be proud of. This was clipped but it was a heck of an emotional speech and after having no feelings about O’Ryan ever, I want to see him come back. It sounded legitimate and that’s hard to take no matter who you are. Hopefully he gets better soon.

Clips from some Unauthorized matches.

Brian Johnson is tired of failing and promises to make 2020 a year of change.

Lifeblood vs. Dragon Lee/Rush

Mark Haskins/Tracy Williams for Lifeblood (Is there anyone left for the team?) and this is under Lucha Rules. Lee and Haskins start things off and go to the mat early on with Haskins not being able to get the full cross armbreaker. A standoff sends us to an early break and we come back to Rush coming in to face Williams. The missed flips begin until Rush dropkicks him out to the floor.

Haskins won’t let him down though, allowing Lee to hit his own dropkick. Everything breaks down and it’s Haskins vs. Lee, as the lack of tags makes sense. Haskins and Williams fire off knees to Lee’s chest and a double kick gets two. Haskins starts working on the arm in various painful ways, including a YES Lock. That’s switched into the Rings of Saturn, sending Lee’s leg onto the rope.

The slugout is on until Lee hits a hard dropkick, allowing the hot tag to Rush so everything can break down. Lee and Rush load up stereo dives but roll into double Tranquilo instead. Back from another break with Lee biting Williams’ ear and Rush coming in for a half crab. Lee grabs a leg of his own and we hit the posing hold. Haskins makes the save but gets sent outside, only to have Williams get kicked down again, requiring a second straight save. Williams fights back and kicks both of them to the floor, setting up a double Lifeblood dive to the floor.

Back in and Lee chops the heck out of both of them until the strikes get the better of him. A Death Valley Driver into a Samoan Driver/powerbomb combination gets two with Rush having to make the save. Williams hits an elevated DDT onto the top on Rush but Lee comes in with a top rope double stomp for the save. Lee brainbusters Haskins and jumps over the top to hurricanrana him off the apron. The Bull’s Horns hits Williams for the pin at 16:01.

Rating: B+. This was all action and I had a blast with it. Lee and Rush are two of the best around right now and you got a great example of the in-ring talent that they have around here. That’s where Ring of Honor keeps its reputation: when you strip away everything else, you get a heck of a match with four talented guys going out there and tearing the house down. I had a great time with this and it’s one of the best things Ring of Honor has done in a long time.

Overall Rating: B. I know it’s a special show and not something you can do every week but this was a lot of fun and the kind of show that they needed to do. Sometimes the solution to the problem, at least in the short term, is to have a fun wrestling show and that’s what we got here. The main event was a blast and worth your time, with the opener being entertaining as well. Good stuff all around here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 17, 2019
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

We’re about a month away from Hard To Kill and the top of the card is already set. I’m not sure how interested I am in Tessa Blanchard vs. Sami Callihan again but the Tag Team Title match sounds good. What matters most is that they have something to shoot for and that is more important than a lot of things. Like Acey Romero vs. Joey Ryan as Ryan’s Wrestler’s Court punishment. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Jordynne Grace vs. Tenille Dashwood

Dashwood still works here? She takes Grace down with a headscissors and then switches to a quickly broken armbar. They trade some standing switches until Dashwood’s crossbody is caught and muscled up into a suplex for two. Grace is sent to the apron and Dashwood gets in a kick to the face, plus a neckbreaker over the ropes for two.

The Tarantula goes on, setting up a reverse DDT for two more on Grace. That’s enough for Grace who busts the heck out of Dashwood’s spine for her own two, plus two more just in case. Dashwood fights out of the Grace Driver so Grace blasts her with a clothesline. Somehow Dashwood is right back up with the Taste of Tenille and a butterfly suplex for two more. Dashwood tries la majistral but Grace drops down onto her for the pin at 7:50.

Rating: C. They did some back and forth stuff here but I’m not sure how much Grace should be going up before the big title shot. Then again I’m not sure how much ODB needs to be in that title match and she’s there anyway. Dashwood has just stopped mattering over the last few months and I don’t see that getting much better.

Post match they shake hands but here’s Taya Valkyrie to jump Grace. Dashwood makes the save though and Taya is sent bailing.

Moose runs into Rhino and tells him that he could have given him some pointers against Rob Van Dam. Rhino decks him, likely setting up a match later tonight.

The North comes up to Willie Mack and actually doesn’t want a fight. Since Mack is hurt, they should let Rich Swann go off and be a singles star. Swann comes up to say tell them to get out of here before a fight breaks out.

The announcers preview the card.

TJP vs. Daga

Fallah Bahh is here with TJP and we get an early handshake. They go to the mat for an early standoff until it’s back to the mat for some grappling. TJP dropkicks him into the corner and we stop for some staring. Back up and Daga armdrags him into an armbar and then does it again for good measure. TJP is right back with his headscissors to spin Daga over but Daga spins out of another attempt and pulls TJP down by the arm.

They trade some flips to maintain arm control, trade rollup for two each, and miss stereo dropkicks as we take a break. Back with Daga hitting some shots in the corner but getting sent out to the floor in a hurry. The springboard slingshot dropkick rocks Daga again and the slingshot hilo gets two back inside. Daga’s headscissors sends TJP into the corner for a change and there’s a forearm to the back.

Daga runs down the ramp for a sunset flip into a double stomp to the chest for two and that means frustration time. TJP spins out of a tiger bomb but his bridging rollup is countered into a superkick. That’s fine with TJP, who hits a jumping spin kick to the face for another double knockdown.

They slug it out until TJP snaps off a hurricanrana into a cross armbreaker but Daga stacks him up for two. A double clothesline puts them both down again and the real frustration is setting in. Daga knocks him down and goes up, earning himself a superplex back down into the Detonation Kick. The kneebar sends Daga to the rope so TJP switches to an STF to make Daga tap at 16:39.

Rating: B-. This got some time and was quite the technical display. TJP can go with anyone and has put in one nice performance after another. I could go for either of them getting a nice push but for some reason I don’t exactly buy that as being the most likely case. At least we got a good match out of the whole thing though.

Post match the Desi Hit Squad runs in to beat down TJP and Bahh. Daga makes the save but Shera comes in to plant him with a chokeslam. Good thing we got to push the important guys.

Brian Cage runs into the very combined forces of Rob Van Dam and Katie Forbes. Rob isn’t worried about their match at Hard To Kill because he knows how to counter his own moves.

Here are Van Dam and Forbes for a chat. Katie introduces him and more kissing ensues. Rob isn’t sure why he’s getting so much attention as of late but he’ll take it while he gets it. After more Katie time, Rob says he’s taking a stand against everyone trying to steal all of his awesome moves. Cage is the biggest Van Dam mark of them all, so here he is in person. The fight is on with Cage getting the better of things until Katie gets in a low blow. Rob plants him with a middle rope Fameasser but won’t give the fans the Van Terminator. Instead he dropkicks the chair into Cage’s head and has some more of Katie.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Generation Me from Final Resolution 2010.

Susie runs into Rosemary, who warns him about James Mitchell, who comes in and gets Susie away from her. Havok comes in to choke Rosemary. The lights go all colorful and Rosemary disappears as Susie seems…..pleased?

Taya interrupts Madison Rayne and Kiera Hogan, who don’t seem pleased. They’re not friends because Taya is rather rude but she needs help. She asks them to help a Knockout in need but they don’t buy it. Maybe if they get a title shot after Hard To Kill? Taya thinks about it.

Ethan Page vs. Rich Swann

Page headlocks him to start so Swann shoves his way out and hits a good dropkick. Swann slugs away but Josh Alexander grabs his foot, allowing Page to get in a thumb to the eye. Page slugs away until Swann grabs a small package for two. That means a change of pace with some stomping in the corner instead of slugging, because Page is that versatile. A kick to the face keeps Swann down but he rolls forward into a clothesline to Page.

Swann gets two off a cartwheel splash but Alexander’s distraction breaks up the 450. Page’s Neutralizer gets two, only to have Swann come right back with some kicks to the head for his own two. Swann has to bail out of the 450 so Page hits a middle rope slam. The Swanton gives Page two but Swann is back with a kick to the face. He dives onto Alexander though, leaving Page to go after Mack. You don’t do that to Willie though and he chases Page back in and decks him for the DQ at 10:02.

Rating: C+. This was all about the mind games at the end and there is nothing wrong with that. Swann and Mack feel like almost guaranteed title winners so going with some doubt is a good idea. I could go for them winning the titles but I could also go with them fighting each other for months in a great feud.

Post match Swann isn’t happy with Willie.

Rhino and Moose get in another fight in the back.

Joey Ryan vs. Acey Romero

Johnny Swinger is on commentary and Joey starts fast with the baby oil down the trunks. Acey won’t touch it but does hurt his knee on an atomic drop. As the announcers talk about Joey killing territories, Acey crushes him with a crossbody and gets two off a spinebuster. They hit heads and Acey falls face first onto Ryan’s crotch, which brings Ryan back to life.

The lollipop goes into the referee’s mouth by mistake (I’m surprised it doesn’t give him superpowers) and it’s time for Acey to grab it. Swinger makes the save and has Acey grab his fanny pack, which has no such powers. Joey is right back up with the Flip and Sweet Tooth Music finishes Acey at 3:54.

Rating: F. Something about me not having fun or not getting wrestling. I think I’m to the point where I don’t need to rant about Joey anymore. He really does seem like a nice guy (including being nice to me on Twitter before) but this isn’t for me and that’s ok. I could go with not seeing it but I know there’s an audience for it. I’m just not part of it.

Tessa Blanchard isn’t worried about Sami Callihan exposing her. She’s going to take the title from the most vile champion the company has ever seen.

Michael Elgin takes Eddie Edwards’ trophy.

Ace Austin vs. Petey Williams

Non-title. Petey elbows him in the face to start and ducks a springboard kick to the face. A headscissors sends Ace into the corner, setting up the slingshot Codebreaker. The Sharpshooter attempt doesn’t work so Petey hits the slingshot hurricanrana to the floor. Ace is right back with a superkick from the apron and we take a break.

Back with Ace hitting a spinning kick to the head for two and then stopping to stare at the crowd. Ace can’t get the paper cut with the card so Petey snaps off a release German suplex. There’s the Russian legsweep but Ace’s Bang-a-Rama gets two. The Canadian Destroyer is blocked but so is Ace’s superplex. Petey powerbombs him instead but the Canadian Destroyer still can’t connect. Ace is right back with the Fold for the pin at 9:40.

Rating: C. That was one of Petey’s better matches in awhile and it was a good bit better than I was expecting. Ace winning wasn’t in doubt but they were both working and got a nice match out of it. I’m liking the Fold more each time I see it and while Ace’s character has changed a lot, I still like what I see out of him.

Post match, Ace dedicates the win to Trey Miguel’s mom. He even blows her a kiss.

Post break Trey Miguel gets in Ace’s face and one more line about Trey’s mom starts the fight. Reno Scum breaks it up.

Hard To Kill rundown.

Here’s Sami Callihan to “expose” Tessa. She’s a fake and a phony, just like everyone sitting here today. People are saying this is something about gender but Sami should be looked at as a hero for spitting in her face, just like he’d do to any man in the back. The fans cheer for Tessa but they have more in common with him. Tessa is the daughter of Tully Blanchard and was raised by Magnum TA.

Sami earned everything he has and became the face of the company by winning the World Title. His dad never got him a tryout so here’s a livid Tessa. Mad Man Fulton jumps her from behind though, meaning the beatdown is on. Ken Shamrock makes the save but Fulton goes after his bad ribs. Sami and Tessa fight to the back where they brawl in front of some fans. Sami punches one of them by mistake before sending Tessa face first into the production truck.

Tessa shrugs that off and they brawl on the sidewalk. Another ram into the truck rocks Tessa and Sami chokes her with some caution tape. Tessa gets in another shot though and they brawl down the sidewalk with Tessa diving out of the back of a truck. Sami chokes her down and Tessa goes after him until referees FINALLY break it up to end the show. This didn’t do much to make Tessa seem like she could hang in a fight with Sami, but the smoke and mirrors will help a lot at the pay per view.

Overall Rating: C+. They were all working hard here and we got a nice show as a result. As usual, it helps a lot to have a goal to move towards and they have that here. It makes things that much easier and you could see the show improving now that a lot of the card is either set or ready to be set. I’m digging most of the show, though there are a few elements I’d like dropped for good. That isn’t going to happen, but you can only hope. Anyway, good show this week and a positive sign as we head towards the pay per view.

Results

Jordynne Grace b. Tenille Dashwood – Rollup

TJP b. Daga – STF

Ethan Page b. Rich Swann via DQ when Willie Mack interfered

Joey Ryan b. Acey Romeo – Sweet Tooth Music

Ace Austin b. Petey Williams – Fold

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Major League Wrestling Fusion

Fusion #88
Date: December 14, 2019
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: AJ Kirsch, Rich Bocchini

It’s tournament time as MLW is dusting off the Opera Cup. Now you may not have heard of the Opera Cup but that could be because it hasn’t been around in about seventy years. Stu Hart was the most recent winner but Davey Boy Smith Jr. had possession of the trophy and is willing to put it up in this tournament. Tonight starts the opening round so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with Injustice in the ring ranting about something but their microphone gets cut. Apparently they’re mad about not being in the Opera Cup tournament, though they are alternates. They have a seat in the ring in protest but here’s King Mo, scheduled for the opening match, to interrupt. With Mo’s manager Dan Lambert on commentary, Mo is ready to fight here’s ACH to even things up a bit and I think you know where this is going.

ACH/King Mo vs. Injustice

It’s Jordan Oliver/Kotto Brazil for the team. Injustice jumps them from behind to start in a hurry but ACH sends Brazil into Oliver as we settle down into something a little more structured. Some dropkicks have Injustice in even more trouble and a double hiptoss to Brazil makes it even worse.

ACH comes back in but gets pulled to the floor so Injustice can take over for the first time. Oliver holds ACH in the corner, setting up Brazil’s running shot to the face. A front facelock cuts off ACH’s charge to the corner and things slow back down a bit. Brazil grabs a Sharpshooter to send ACH over to the ropes and it’s a hard clothesline to drop Oliver. The hot tag brings in Mo and it’s time to clean house in a hurry.

Brazil is smart enough to cut that off in a hurry with a hurricanrana into an enziguri from Oliver. Not that it matters though as Mo spears both of them at once as everything breaks down. ACH kicks away, including a basement dropkick to Brazil. A Stinger Splash/enziguri combination sets up a sitout gutwrench powerbomb to Brazil. Mo slaps on a kneebar to make Brazil tap at 10:35.

Rating: C. I’ve never been a fan of Mo but he has looked great so far in MLW, mainly because he is coming off as a mixed martial artist who is learning to wrestle rather than a mixed martial artist who is doing wrestling between fights. ACH looked good as well, but that’s always the case when he’s in the ring and not ranting about various things.

Here are the Opera Cup brackets:

Davey Boy Smith Jr.

Low Ki

Alex Hammerstone

Maxwell Jacob Friedman

Timothy Thatcher

Richard Holliday

Brian Pillman Jr.

TJP

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Konnan and Gino Medina had a meeting.

The Dynasty has some coffee but it’s GIFT TRAIN time! They are ready for the greatest Hanukkah SLASH Christmas ever. MJF has actually gotten Holliday the giant Air Pods and Holliday is in tears. They’re not connected to Blu-Tooth but Holliday has a present for MJF: Max Mini, as in a miniature version of MJF (not a mini luchador cameo alas). MJF isn’t pleased and has Hammerstone get rid of him. These guys are still gold together.

Video on the Opera Cup.

Opera Cup First Round: Timothy Thatcher vs. Richard Holliday

Holliday shoves him in the face to start and that’s just not a good idea as he’s quickly suplexed down. Thatcher starts pounding away but a suplex into a swinging neckbreaker (the 2008, because it’s a recession for Thatcher) gives Holliday a breather. Thatcher shrugs off some shots to the head though and grabs a half crab. That’s switched into an ankle lock so Holliday rolls him into the corner.

Some forearms to the chest rock Holliday again but he scores with a quick DDT. A backbreaker and spinebuster give Holliday two more and he’s getting frustrated. Thatcher grabs a spinning butterfly suplex for two of his own and he takes Holliday up. That means a spinning 2008 to drop Thatcher….but he pulls Holliday into a Fujiwara armbar for the fast tap at 10:03.

Rating: C+. This took some time to get going but what matters is Thatcher winning while Holliday also looked good. I know MJF has the talking abilities and Hammerstone looked great with all the power, but Holliday is a very polished performer of his own. I could go for more of him on his own, along with more Thatcher wins.

Salina de la Renta talks to Gino Medina as well.

Mance Warner wants a Prince of Darkness (blindfold) match with Jimmy Havoc. Fine, just END THIS already.

Zero Hour ad, featuring Jimmy Havoc vs. Mance Warner in a barbed wire match. So yeah we have at least two more matches.

The Von Erichs vent to their dad about Tom Lawlor. Kevin says he’s been there with a bunch of people turning on him over the years and it’s always about money. Go get revenge in the ring.

Josef Samael says Ikuro Kwon is on a special mission in Japan so Contra soldiers around the world are rising up.

The Strong Hearts are coming from OWE and want Contra. Remember when these people were supposed to be a big part of AEW?

Opera Cup First Round: TJP vs. Brian Pillman Jr.

Pillman works on the arm to start so TJP spins around a lot and grabs an anklescissors to take over. A headlock takeover works a bit better for Pillman, so TJP gets on his own shoulders….and crawls out to make Pillman look a little foolish. They both miss big kicks to the head and that means a standoff for some applause from the crowd.

A headscissors puts Pillman on the floor and a springboard slingshot dropkick knocks him silly. Back in and TJP starts some rapid fire kicks to the chest, setting up a Muta Lock to make it worse. That’s quickly countered into a chinlock so TJP lets go in a smart move. TJP slips out and cranks on the arm but Pillman grabs a powerslam for two of his own. A tornado DDT plants Pillman but TJP can’t follow up.

Air Pillman is broken up with a kick to the floor and the kneebar has Pillman in even more trouble. With Pillman getting too close to the ropes, TJP switches over to an STF but that’s broken up as well. Some kicks to the arm and ribs have Pillman rocked again so he comes back with a superkick. TJP grabs the Detonation Kick but Pillman ducks, setting up the Dire Promise for the pin at 13:24.

Rating: C+. That’s one of Pillman’s best singles matches to date, though some of that is likely due to being in there against TJP. What matters is the fact that he had the match he needed to have and it looked pretty good in the process. Pillman is still very young in his career and getting in ring time against quality competition like this is the best thing that he can do. The athleticism is there and if he can get everything else going for him, he’s going to be more than fine.

Overall Rating: B-. This is one of those matches where they set things up and just had some nice wrestling throughout. Yeah it helps when you have a tournament, but in addition to the wrestling, you also have various factions and groups lining up. Some of them seem interested in going after Contra too, which is the point of a show: going after the World Title. I know that sounds simple, but sometimes going simple is the best thing they can do. Nice show here, and one of the better they’ve had in some time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6