NWA Powerrr – January 21, 2020: You Gotta Believe

IMG Credit: National Wrestling Alliance

Powerrr
Date: January 21, 2020
Location: GPB Studios, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Stu Bennett, Joe Galli

It’s the season finale, meaning the last show before Saturday’s Hard Times event. I’m not sure what that is going to mean, but apparently this week’s show is going to be an extended hour and a half edition. Hopefully they use the extra time in a good way, and around here I think they actually will. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap sets up Nick Aldis vs. Ricky Morton for the World Title tonight.

Into The Fire.

Here’s Robert Gibson for a chat. He’s so happy to have helped his friend and partner get a World Title shot. Now go get it.

Tasha Steelz vs. Thunder Rosa

Steelz grabs a headlock to start but gets snapmared down and kicked in the back of the head. Rosa kicks her in the corner and chokes a bit with the boot, setting up a quick dragon sleeper. A hangman’s neckbreaker keeps Steelz in trouble but she gets a boot up in the corner. Steelz gets dropkicked out of the air though and a sitout Emerald Flosion finishes for Rosa at 2:52. This was just a step above a squash.

Post match Rosa says if you want to know what Melina’s problem is with her, ask Melina.

Nick Aldis is coming to see Marty Scurll in Baltimore and wants the NWA to come out in force. The tickets are free too.

Here are Royce Isaacs and Mae Valentine for a chat. Royce talks about Strictly Business being on fire but it’s pointed out that he is on a personal losing streak. That doesn’t sit well with Royce, who says his stock is going up. Galli lists off all of Royce’s losses and points out that the losses started when Valentine debuted. That’s not cool with Valentine and we’re done.

Let Austin Idol teach you how to get heat!

TV Title Tournament Qualifier: Thom Latimer vs. Trevor Murdoch

Latimer stomps away to start in a hurry to put Murdoch on the floor early on. Murdoch gets sent face first into the apron and a rake to the back makes it even worse. Back in and Latimer hits a powerbomb for two but a missed charge in the corner lets Murdoch grab a rollup (with trunks) for the pin at 2:31. That was his only offense for the match.

We recap Melina vs. Allysin Kay. Melina is a star but Kay is the defending Women’s Champion so it’s classic vs. modern.

Melina and Kay are at the interview desk with Melina wanting to make amends. Kay isn’t convinced and tells her to spit it out so Melina tells her to f****** listen. Melina has an idea for a match and Kay is ready to go. Hold on though as it isn’t against Melina, because Kay has to face Thunder Rosa at the pay per view. For now though, it’s a No DQ match with Kay facing….someone.

Allysin Kay vs. Marti Belle

Non-title and No DQ. It’s a brawl to start with Marti hammering away in the corner but getting knocked outside in a hurry. They slug it out on the floor until Marti flapjacks her onto the steps. Kay can’t get a chair as Belle kicks her away and puts on something like a camel clutch with Kay’s neck through the chair. That’s broken up and Belle’s knee hits the chair so Kay can slug away and take the fight into the crowd. Back in and Kay hits the AK47 onto the chair for the pin at 4:48.

Rating: C-. It was short but intense with Kay getting to showcase herself a bit more than usual. It’s almost weird that the Women’s Champion gets so little exposure but a showdown with Melina is the best thing for everyone involved. Odds are Melina wins the title, as they could have someone take it from her for a big rub. Either way, not a bad match here, with Belle getting to shine a bit.

Video on Nick Aldis vs. Ricky Morton. It’s so weird to say that in 2020. Or ever for that matter.

Buy the VHS guide to spiritual….something.

Here are the Pope and Eddie Kingston for a chat. Pope isn’t to blame for last week’s loss because he’ll help you if he can. People have been asking what his endgame is but he is still looking for his Super Powers and his Horsemen, and then you’ll see where this is going. Kingston says last week’s match shouldn’t have happened but Pope pushed them a bit too hard. They needed their victory last week but they learn instead of lose.

Kyle Davis replaces Galli on commentary. Was this taped out of order or something?

Here’s Aron Stevens for a ka-ra-tae demonstration, brought to you by the Mongrobian Ka-Ra-Tae Association. He brings out the Question Mark, but insists that he is NOT a mark! First, we face Mongrobia and bow, followed by Mark demonstrating a few chops. Now it’s some strikes to a masked man, followed by an explanation of how to disarm a man with a gun (or a finger gun).

But what if someone is carrying, say, a spatula? As I long for a squeegee joke, Mark demonstrates how to steal mace and use it on your attacker. Now we see two attackers taken out at once, which is why Mongrobia doesn’t need a nuclear program. Mark is ready to break some Mongrobian oak, but Stevens wants to do it himself so he can earn his fourth degree black belt.

Stevens needs to breathe a bit….but one of the masked men hits him with the board and unmasks as…..Ricky Starks for a good payoff. Speaking of payoffs, if you want to know Mongrobian secrets like these, it’s just 99.99 a month to learn why Mongrobia has been a free nation for thousands of years. This was rather entertaining as these two continue to be some of the most entertaining people in the NWA.

Buy Tony Falk’s tire irons! And have a waffle while you’re at it!

Gauntlet Match

The winner is the final entrant in the TV Title tournament. This is basically an eight man Royal Rumble and you can be eliminated by pinfall, submission or being thrown over the top. CW Anderson is in at #1 and Caleb Konley is in at #2. Feeling out process to start with neither being able to get anywhere until Konley takes him down by the arm. That’s broken up and we’re at another standoff.

Jocephus is in at #3 and is eliminated in about six seconds. Anderson clotheslines Konley for two but gets caught in a sitout ProtoBomb into a half crab. Colt Cabana is in at #4 as the intervals are all over the place. Cabana beats both of them up in a hurry, including a reverse Rings of Saturn to Konley. Anderson breaks that up and stomps on Cabana as Dave Dawson is in at #5. Splashes abound and it’s turning into more of a regular battle royal. Everyone is knocked down and it’s Aron Stevens at #6.

Stevens gets in, looks around, goes to the floor and crawls underneath the ring, Cue Zicky Dice to say he’s undefeated everyone around here and won’t be wrestling here because he’s already qualified. With that out of the way, Sal Rinauro is in at #7 to clean some house until Dawson dropkicks him for two. Everyone gangs up on Dawson though and Konley’s moonsault gets rid of him to clear the ring a bit. Ken Anderson is in at #8, giving us a final field of CW Anderson, Konley, Cabana, Stevens (under the ring), Rinauro and Ken Anderson.

Ken gets to clean house, including the Mic Check to eliminate Rinauro. Cabana and Ken get together to take over, which means it’s another Mic Check to get rid of Konley. CW hits Ken with a spinebuster but it’s the Superman Pin to finish CW off. Cabana and Ken are ready to go at it but cue the Question Mark as Stevens gets back in. Mark Mongrobian Spikes Stevens by mistake though and Stevens is paralyzed, allowing Cabana and Ken to throw him out. A handshake lets Ken roll Cabana up for the win at 12:35.

Rating: C. This worked well enough, mainly due to the battle royal setup instead of just a regular gauntlet. Ken getting the win is a good way to go as he’s one of the bigger stars around here. I could go for he and Cabana having a feud as neither exactly has anything better to do. If nothing else, you can probably bet on Cabana costing Ken his tournament match and that’s fine.

Post match Ken shakes Cabana’s hand….but hits him low and grabs another Mic Check. That’s not it though as Cabana gets posted for the knockout.

Hard Times video.

Eli Drake and James Storm are here to see Ricky Morton win the World Title. Storm is a tag team wrestler because of Morton and tonight Morton is like Dale Earnhardt. We even get a prayer for Morton to win the World Title tonight. Drake is fired up too and this helped things a bit.

It’s time for the Hard Times Control Center.

The final two spots in the TV Title tournament will be Matt Cross and Ring of Honor’s Dan Maff.

Maff wanted to be on the list of great NWA TV Champions.

Flip Gordon is ready for Nick Aldis at Hard Times because Marty Scurll has made him a new man.

New stipulation on the main event: if Morton wins, he is defending at Hard Times. If Aldis wins, the Rock N Roll Express have to defend in a triple threat match against the Wild Cards and Eli Drake/James Storm.

One more thing: Aron Stevens defends the National Title against Scott Steiner. I think I need to see that one.

NWA World Title: Nick Aldis vs. Ricky Morton

Aldis is defending and Billy Corgan is on commentary to make it special. Robert Gibson and Strictly Business are all at ringside for a bonus. Hold on though as Corgan tells Bennett something. Bennett says everyone has to leave ringside so it can be one on one. Aldis bails to the floor to start and it’s over a minute before they lock up for the first time. That goes nowhere so they circle each other a bit and lock up again, giving us another standoff.

Morton works on a headlock and manages to get Aldis on the mat for a change. Back up and a chop sends Aldis into the corner so it’s time for Aldis to start hammering away. Aldis goes for the arm so Morton elbows him in the face as they’re keeping it in first (or maybe second) gear so far. Some right hands in the corner send Aldis to the floor again but he rakes the eyes to get a breather.

Morton gets posted and a hard whip sends him into the corner for a bonus. A headbutt puts Morton down but he punches Aldis out of the air. That just earns him another rake to the eyes but Morton slams him off the top (he did face Flair before). A hurricanrana sets up a Figure Four on Aldis but a rope is grabbed. Morton tries a small package so Aldis reverses into one of his own and grabs the tights for the pin at 11:00.

Rating: C+. I didn’t come into this exactly thrilled with the concept but by the end, I wanted to see Morton win the title. Maybe it would be just a nostalgia act, but that can be a lot of fun at times. Of course it wasn’t going to happen and wouldn’t have been a great idea, but they got me on board and that’s more than I would have expected.

We get a graphic from Villain Enterprises saying Hard Times are coming for Aldis.

We look at the Hard Times lineup one more time to end the show.

Roll Credits.

Overall Rating: C+. The point of this show was to make me want to see Hard Times more than I did coming in and that’s what they did. The show is looking pretty nice on paper and that’s more than I would have bet on coming in. Somehow the NWA is having an intriguing run as of late and I’m curious to see where it wins up. Just have a good Hard Times and we should be fine.

Results

Thunder Rosa b. Tasha Steelz – Sitout Emerald Flosion

Trevor Murdoch b. Thom Latimer – Rollup with trunks

Allysin Kay b. Marti Belle – AK47 onto a chair

Ken Anderson won a gauntlet match last eliminating Colt Cabana

Nick Aldis b. Ricky Morton – Small package with tights

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Best Of 2010s: News Story Of The Decade

IMG Credit: WWE

This is more of the big picture idea. Over the last ten years, there have been a lot of things that have changed the way wrestling works. Some of these are changes that will be felt for years to come and that is where things can get interesting. I always find this one more interesting than a lot of the other awards as it’s something completely different than so many others.

Honorable Mention

Everything That Went Wrong For Hulk Hogan – I know that we are literally decades past his time but anything that involves in to this degree is worthy of at least a mention.

Roman Reigns Health Issues – This might not have had the biggest long term implications, but any time that the World Champion announces that he has cancer, it’s a big deal.

Ultimate Warrior’s Death – I was in the arena for his final promo and drove home twelve hours the next day. That night I was ready to sleep for a few days, but then this news broke and I was in such shock that I was awake for hours. I’m still not sure how this happened and it’s almost impossible to fathom.

The WWE Goes Big (FOX TV Deal)

WWE has been the biggest wrestling promotion for a long time now and that means they are allowed to brag about a lot of things. However, one of the biggest things that they accomplished was managing to make it all the way up to network television, which really is something that deserves serious praise.

It’s one thing to be the top of the wrestling world but it’s another to be put into the top level of televised entertainment. WWE is on the same network as the NFL and various other major sporting events. That is the kind of thing that wrestling just does not do and WWE managed to do it. You can argue how well it is going or how much of a success it will be, but the fact that they got there is a new benchmark for wrestling and WWE can be very proud of it.

WWE In Saudi Arabia

Yeah I know these things aren’t all that popular but they are the reason WWE is going to be profitable for years to come no matter how many people are actually watching the regular shows. While all of the controversies around the shows do not help things very much, the money that WWE brings in from them is far too much for them to turn down and they aren’t likely to go anywhere anytime soon.

The shows bring in so much money and they are allowing WWE to do all kinds of things that they weren’t going to be able to do otherwise. This includes bringing back pyro and signing a bunch of people, which makes things a lot more interesting. I’m not entirely comfortable with the shows most of the time, but they are going to be a factor for a long time, like they or not.

CM Punk Walks Out

This is one of those things where it was a big deal at the time and then it got bigger and bigger over time. For years to come, it became a question of whether or not Punk would ever come back and, as far as in the ring goes, that has not been the case. I don’t know if he ever will wrestle again or not, but the way he left was one of the biggest deals in wrestling for a long time to come.

The fallout from Punk leaving though may have been even bigger, with everything from the Art of Wrestling interview (and EVERYTHING that brought with it) to the ensuing lawsuit to the Backstage return and all of the waiting in between. It was a story that spiraled out of control and it still hasn’t quite gotten back under control to this day. I’m not sure if it ever will and that’s quite the ordeal.

Daniel Bryan Retires And Then Unretires

From late 2013 until early 2014, no one was hotter than Daniel Bryan. He caught lightning in a bottle with the YES Movement and everything that came with it. Bryan had one of the greatest moments in the history of Wrestlemania with the Miracle On Bourbon Street, but then it all fell apart and just over a year later, he was out of the ring for good, with his retirement speech being one of the best ever.

But then he was eventually cleared, and no one believed it. After years of fighting to get back in the ring, Bryan managed to make it happen in one of the most unlikely comebacks of all time. The reason this is such a big deal is how many new doors it opens. Couple that with how much it reinforces the idea of Never Say Never and it is one of the stories that shows nothing in wrestling ever truly ends, and that’s a good thing.

Rise of NXT

Who would have seen this coming? Back in 2010, a new competition show called NXT debuted and it….was really not very good. The show replaced ECW and it was all downhill from there, with one bad idea after another and it went on for years. Eventually the show moved to WWE.com and Full Sail University, where names such as Michael McGillicutty and Derrick Bateman were the top stars for a good while.

Over the next several years, NXT evolved into one of the most celebrated and incredible wrestling promotions in the world, regularly showcasing the stars of tomorrow and often stealing the show every time they run a major event. NXT is no longer on a hot streak as they are a full on success, with the end of 2019 seeing them rise up to the same level as Raw and Smackdown. That’s a decades long story and one of the best that you could have seen.

AEW

This one snuck in at the end and it wouldn’t surprise me to see it be at the top of the list ten years from now. Impact Wrestling and Ring of Honor were around for the last ten years as well but neither came close to WWE at any point. AEW has come out swinging and while they are far from taking over anything, they have shown that WWE may be mortal in the eyes of the wrestling fans. That is the definition of a game changer and the question now is how far they can go.

What matters here is how much everything could change. We are now in a world where WWE is not the be all end all of major wrestling companies in the United States. That is something that could shake up wrestling in a way we have not seen in twenty years. I’m not sure where it is going to go and that is a very nice feeling I haven’t had in a long time.

The Women’s Revolution

You can’t call this a storyline or an angle because it has become a new way of life. The women’s division went from nothing, with women’s matches being lucky to get seven minutes even on pay per view, to main eventing Wrestlemania. That is one of those things where you would never believe it to be a possibility and then it happened. It was an exciting time and while you might not be a fan of what you’re seeing, it’s a genuinely major deal and something that is very cool to see.

What makes this so important is that it didn’t seem possible. The women’s division was little more than a way to kill some time and throw out some eye candy. The wrestlers had no personalities, no stories, and were mainly there to promote Total Divas. There were some steps forward here and there, but it wasn’t until 2015 (and thanks to NXT) that they were taken seriously. The genie can’t be put back into the bottle and that’s pretty newsworthy.

And now, for something that we have taken for granted for a long time now.

WWE Network

I’ve called this the greatest thing to ever happen to wrestling fans and I stick by that statement. Do you remember what it was like trying to find old wrestling before the Network came into play? You either had to tape it, know a place to find it illegally, or search YouTube for clips before WWE found out about it. Now, every Raw or Smackdown, pay per view, and material from all around the wrestling world is available at your fingertips for a cheap price.

The days of needing to pay $50 for a pay per view are gone and that is not changing back. You can watch Wrestlemania, NXT, Slamboree 1994 or an episode of Texas Championship Wrestling at the click of a button and do it completely legally. The wrestling world has been opened up in a way that has never been done before and it is the best thing to ever happen to wrestling fans.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Best Of 2010s: Spot Of The Decade

IMG Credit: WWE

There are things that everyone remembers and that is the case for a reason. Some of these are as memorable as you can get and they are going to be that way for a very long time. This is a time where the top of the list is quite good, though there might not be the biggest list of choices. That’s because the best ones are just that awesome, which is the case here.

Honorable Mention

Dance Off – WrestleCon SuperShow Ten Man Tag – YouTube it. YouTube the whole match actually.

Kurt Angle’s Moonsault Off The Cage – Lockdown 2010

Kurt Angle is not a well man. There is something wrong in his head that makes him do some crazy things and this was one of them. He was in the middle of a war with Mr. Anderson (in a near classic cage match) and went on top of the cage in a repeat of his famous spot against Chris Benoit. This one actually connected (albeit mainly on Anderson’s face) and Angle went on to win the thing.

The biggest thing I can take out of this is that Angle is insane. I know that sounds a little over the top but are you really convinced otherwise? Angle is out there on a lot of things and this is just another example, though sweet goodness if that wasn’t a memorable move and one of the best matches TNA has ever had. Check that one out in full, but you’ll remember this part best.

Shane McMahon’s Cell Dive – Wrestlemania XXXII

I was in the stadium for this one and I almost couldn’t watch it. Maybe it’s my fear of heights but sweet goodness this wasn’t something I wanted to see happen. It was actually scary, though once you see the crash pad and hear Cole shout “FOR THE LOVE OF MANKIND” it wasn’t quite as bad. They weren’t quite recreating a classic, but there’s something special when you can feel your heart in your throat for a second.

There’s something special about seeing Shane do something this insane and nearly destroying himself in the process. He knows how to get that kind of a reaction from the fans and a lot of that is due to how much the fans care about him. This was an incredible dive and while we found out that it was a bit safer later on, the moment before he dove was as terrified as I can remember being at a wrestling show, and that has to mean something.

Ricochet Tells Velveteen Dream To Show Him – NXT – May 30, 2018

Sometimes in wrestling, there are moments where all you can do is just look in awe because you don’t know what just happened. Those are the moments where you know what you’re watching is special and that is the case a lot of the time when Ricochet is in the ring. There’s something about him that you can’t take your eyes off of and that was the case with the coolest thing he’s ever done.

Velveteen Dream was saying that he could do anything Ricochet could, so Ricochet got a running start, flipped over the top rope and landed on his feet in front of Dream. It takes a lot to impress Dream and he was STUNNED, giving us an additional moment to make this so special. Ricochet wrestles like a superhero and that’s what we got here, with one of the coolest things I can remember seeing in a long time.

Randy Orton RKOs Evan Bourne Out Of The Air – Raw – July 12, 2010

As luck would have it, I was in the arena for this one too and sweet goodness I don’t know what I saw. It was one of those moments that was as perfectly timed as you could have had, almost to the level of Shawn superkicking Shelton. Evan Bourne ran down to jump Orton after a match and tried the shooting star press, only to have Orton catch him out of the air with an RKO.

The timing, the impact, the selling from Bourne (a huge part) came together to make Orton look like a killer. This is one of those things where you see it happen and still can’t believe what you saw because there should be no way someone can time this so well. It was absolutely perfect and something where you don’t believe it could happen until you see it, and then you still don’t believe it because THAT’S NOT NORMAL.

I think it’s safe to say I watch a lot of wrestling so it takes something to have me jump to my feet. This did it.

Undertaker Kicks Out – Wrestlemania XXVIII

The Streak is something that will never be replicated. How can you tell? Given that you all know exactly what I mean when I say the Streak and probably started a highlight reel in your head, there is no way anything can ever match it. That’s why it was a scary prospect when it felt like it was in danger, and I have never believed it was over more than I did inside the Cell.

After pushing him a little too far, guest referee Shawn Michaels superkicked Undertaker into a Pedigree from HHH, sending Cole into shouts of “STREAK’S OVER! STREAK’S OVER!” I believed it, the fans believed it, the commentators believed it….and it wasn’t over. Undertaker kicked out again because for one night of the year, he’s immortal.

This is greatest near fall I’ve ever seen and it came in a match that would have headlined almost any other Wrestlemania. This was the match of the night and had more than one of the best moments of the year (Undertaker stepping on the sledgehammer is great too), plus the spot of the decade.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Dark – January 21, 2020: Short And Steady

IMG Credit: WWE

Dark
Date: January 21, 2020
Location: Watsco Center, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Excalibur, Taz
Hosts: Tony Schiavone, Dasha Gonzalez

It’s another show from the Bash At The Beach special, though I’m not sure if this one counts or not. Dark has gotten a lot shorter in recent weeks and that’s a good thing. Keeping things short lets the show pack a bit more of a punch without wearing out its welcome. Now hopefully they keep it that way. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

The hosts welcome run down the card.

Big Swole vs. Diamante

Swole grabs the wristlock to start and rolls her up for a fast one. An exchange of rollups is good for an exchange of one counts and sets up an exchange of headlocks. Swole wins an exchange of shoulders and kicks Diamante in the face for the first real knockdown. Diamante knees her right back and chokes a bit, but can only hit two Amigos.

A lot of taunting the crowd doesn’t get Diamante very far so she German suplexes Swole into the corner for two instead. Frustration sets in so Diamante grabs….a pair of sandals? One of them is taken away but the second connects for a few shots, only to have Swole take it away. That means an abdominal stretch for some spanking with the sandal, much to the fans’ delight. Now even more annoyed, Diamante misses a bunch of kicks before getting headbutted away. Dirty Dancing finishes for Swole at 7:22.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one very well, but Swole is the kind of person that AEW needs. She isn’t well known but has an interesting story that people could get behind. Push her and see what she can do as she can back it up well enough in the ring. I don’t know if she’s going to be the next big thing, but they need a big thing for the future at some point so see what she might have.

Here’s where Dynamite is coming.

Strong Hearts vs. Jurassic Express

Jungle Boy headlocks T-Hawk to start but loses a battle of the shoulder blocks. The pace picks up a bit with Boy flipping him into a pair of kicks to the face. A chop knocks Boy back though, meaning it’s Stunt tagging himself in to face Lindaman. Stunt pumps himself up to try some shoulders, which go as well as you would expect. A slingshot sunset flip gets two on Lindaman but he avoids a leg lariat for a standoff.

It’s off to Cima for a running dropkick on Luchasaurus, which doesn’t have much effect. Luchasaurus cleans house and throws Boy at Cima for a Downward Spiral. Back to back springboard armdrags put T-Hawk and Cima on the floor and that means back to back suicide dives. Luchasaurus throws Stunt onto the two of them for a bonus and we settle down to Stunt pounding on Cima, only to get caught with a triple basement dropkick.

Something like an STF has Stunt in more trouble until a rope grab is good for the save. Stunt forearms away but runs into a sitout spinebuster for two, setting up an assisted double flip powerslam (Chikara fans would know it better as Ragnarok). Jungle Boy makes the save as everything breaks down.

The hot tag brings in Luchasaurus to start wrecking people, including slamming T-Hawk onto Cima. A standing moonsault gets two on Lindaman and it’s Boy’s lifted Downward Spiral for two. Luchasaurus gets to kick more people in the face and then tosses Lindaman into a sitout spinebuster (similar to the North’s finisher) to give Boy the pin at 10:51.

Rating: C+. I’m still not big on Stunt but this was a fun six man with Luchasaurus getting to show off and Boy continuing his good roll over the last few months. The Jurassic Express got off to a pretty slow start so it’s nice to see them getting back on their feet in the new year. Hopefully that continues, as Luchasaurus could go somewhere with or without the other two.

Tony and Dasha wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C. Well that was quick. This one didn’t even clock in at half an hour, which makes it more like the kind of show I was expecting when the show was announced. You don’t need all of the recaps and story building things around here (though the latter are nice bonuses on occasion) and going with a straight wrestling show is a good idea. Not a bad show here, but the length was the most surprising part, as the show has been cut by nearly forty five minutes in just a few weeks.

Results

Big Swole b. Diamante – Dirty Dancing

Jurassic Express b. Strong Hearts – Assisted sitout spinebuster to Lindaman

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2013 (2014 Redo): What’s Eating CM Punk?

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2013
Date: January 27, 2013
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 13,00
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This show was only a year ago and I can barely remember anything about it. Aside from the Rumble the big matches are the Rock challenging CM Punk for the WWE Title in the most obvious ending ever and Alberto Del Rio defending his newly won World Heavyweight Championship against Big Show in a last man standing match. Other than that we’ve only got HELL NO vs. the Rhodes Scholars to complete the card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro is defending. This is just after Flair passed the Figure Four to Miz, starting the worst period of his career. Miz grabs a headlock to start and gets two off an elbow to the jaw. The headlock takes Cesaro down to the mat but he fights up and grabs one of his own. Back up and Miz tries a leapfrog but gets caught in midair with a tikt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. The champion takes over and cranks on both of Miz’s arms before getting two off a Michinoku Driver.

A hard European uppercut sets up the gutwrench suplex for two and it’s back to the double arm. Back up again and Miz slips out of a slam and hooks the Reality Check for two. There’s the running clothesline in the corner and Miz goes up but hurts his knee on the top rope ax handle. Cesaro gets caught with his feet on the ropes, allowing Miz to get two off a rollup. Antonio misses a running knee in the corner but is still able to roll away from the Figure Four. Cesar takes him to the floor and rams Miz into the metal underneath the ring. Miz is out cold so Cesaro Neutralizes him for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. Miz just doesn’t work in a lot of these matches and the Figure Four doesn’t work in the slightest. Thankfully he wouldn’t be featured very prominently for awhile as there was just nothing to him for the most part. Cesaro still needs to get a push as he’s more talented and marketable than half the roster but instead we get people like Miz.

The opening video is about time passing and how no one has enough. This ties into Punk’s time as champion with Rock saying the reign ends tonight.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

Last man standing match, which is a rematch with the same stipulations from when Alberto won the title a few weeks ago. Del Rio turned the announce table on top of Big Show so Big Show turned it on top of him a few weeks later. Alberto is shown in the back and he runs into Bret Hart for no apparent reason whatsoever. Bret says Alberto reminds him of a Mexican version of himself. Alberto calls Bret a Canadian Del Rio and Ricardo gushes, earning him Bret’s sunglasses. What a bizarre cameo.

Some hard chops have Del Rio in early trouble and a slam gets a five count. Alberto chops away but jumps off the middle rope right into a chop to change control right back. The champion dropkicks the giant’s knee out but the low superkick actually knocks Big Show up from his knees to his feet. A hurricanrana and a seated senton put Big Show down and Alberto gets a breather. It’s amazing how much more intersting Del Rio is by doing this lucha stuff instead of his arm work. The arm stuff is good but this is such a nice change of pace.

Big Show blocks the armbreaker with one arm and slams Del Rio down, sending him outside. Del Rio gets back in as Big Show gets a chair but the champion dropkicks him in the ribs to knock it out of his hands. A series of chair shots (crowd: “SI! SI! SI!”) has Big Show down but Alberto dives into a chokeslam for an eight count. We head outside again with Del Rio getting chopped to the floor with ease. This is a very slow paced match so far.

A pair of low blows puts Big Show down in the aisle but he’s up at nine. Show hits something resembling a DDT on the floor before sending Del Rio into the set. He rips a piece of the set, resembling a light tube, and blasts Del Rio over the back. Since this is WWE there’s a table readily available and Big Show takes the champion on top of the set for a chokeslam through the table. The bump looked awesome but he’s again on his feet at nine.

The beating takes Del Rio back to the ring and Show loads up the WMD. Alberto sees it coming and rolls outside, only to have Big Show throw Ricardo around for fun. Big Show misses a charge through the barricade (clearly heavily padded) for five but a long series of chair shots has him down again. Del Rio crushes the arm between the steps and a chair, but Alberto follows up with a fire extinguisher blast to the face for no apparent reason. Back in and the armbreaker goes on, but Ricardo ups the ante by duct taping Big Show’s legs to the ropes. The giant can’t get up and Alberto retains the title.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t the worst match in the world but it was very slowly paced and the ending made Del Rio look more clever than tough. It also doesn’t help that the match was the same gimmick they did less than a month ago. Face Alberto was a nice guy but they cut the cord just six months after this. Not bad, but Del Rio winning the title here would have been much better.

Send Slim Jims to the military!

Ziggler isn’t worried about being in the Rumble and AJ threatens Matt Striker with Big E. Langston for implying Ziggler can’t win. Langston does one of the most mind blowing imitations of an annoying reporter while asking Ziggler for his thoughts on the main event. Dolph has little of note to say but no one was hearing him after Big E.’s bit anyway.

Cesaro says he’ll continue the streak of non-Americans winning the Rumble.

The Prime Time Players……WE’RE GETTING RUMBLE PROMOS!!!! Anyway they say anyone that thinks they’ll eliminate either of them is getting a penalty flag.

Orton says he’s perfect for the Rumble because it’s every man for himself.

Cena is ready for the Rumble because it means he can be champion again.

Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett says he’ll restore credability to the Rumble.

Sheamus says he won the Rumble last year and he’ll do it again tonight.

Ryback isn’t any catchphrase and he doesn’t eat Fruity Pebbles, but he’ll see food every 90 seconds. Feed him more.

We recap Miz vs. Cesaro on the pre-show.

Tag Titles: HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

The Scholars are challenging. Cody kicks Bryan in the ribs as Cole references Queen lyrics. Bryan spins out of a wristlock and the fans chant for Cody’s mustache. Cody’s leapfrog is countered into a surfboard and it’s off to Kane for a low dropkick and a two count. Rhodes scores with a dropkick of his own and drives Kane into the corner for the tag off to Sandow. Kane easily powers Sandow into the corner because, you know, he’s Damien Sandow and it’s off to Bryan for the YES Kicks.

JBL rants about Cole and Lawler hugging as Kane kicks Sandow in the face, knocking him out to the floor. The FLYING GOAT takes out the challengers but Cody low bridges Bryan to the floor to take over. Back in and a half crab has Daniel in trouble but he reverses into a small package to escape. Damien comes in again and drops an elbow for two before dropping the Wind-Up Elbow.

After some knees to the back it’s Cody in again but he charges into a boot in the corner. Sandow breaks up a hot tag attempt and Cody puts Bryan in an over the shoulder backbreaker. Daniel slides down to escape and makes the tag to Kane. Sandow is tossed around like a rag doll but a Cody distraction prevents the top rope clothesline. Kane grabs both guys by the throat and Bryan tags himself in. The Scholars double suplex Kane but Bryan shoves Cody into a chokeslam and Daniel YES Locks Sandow to retain.

Rating: C. Nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw around this time which means it was fine. The Scholars were a nice idea for a team but it was clear that they had no chance at this point given how low their individual stocks were. Kane and Bryan gelled perfectly well as a team and Bryan would get far bigger very soon.

Rumble By The Numbers which I’ve typed many times already.

HELL NO celebrates in the back when Vickie Guerrero comes up and gives them their Rumble numbers. Daniel shows Kane his but Kane won’t show Bryan.

We look at the Royal Rumble Fan Fest which is another name for Axxess. This included a tournament of NXT wrestlers for a spot in the Rumble, won by Bo Dallas.

Royal Rumble

Ziggler is #1 which he picked (the other option was #2) after winning a Beat the Clock Challenge on Raw. Dolph says he’ll win and doesn’t care who he faces first, bringing out a returning Chris Jericho at #2. This was a complete shock and the roof is blown off the building. Also remember that Ziggler beat Jericho to send him out of the company to give us some history. The clock is at 90 seconds between entrants this year.

Jericho is quickly sent to the apron but comes back with a top rope ax handle. Now it’s Dolph on the apron as the fans tell Jericho he still has it. When did Jericho ever come close to losing it? A superplex brings Ziggler back into the ring and Cody Rhodes is in at #3. Jericho hammers away on him but Ziggler gets in a cheap shot as the double teaming begins. Chris knocks Ziggler down and puts Cody in the Walls but Dolph makes the save.

Dolph catapults Jericho throat first into the bottom rope as Kofi Kingston is in at #4. Kofi immediately speeds things up and pounds away on Cody but can’t hit Ziggy with Trouble in Paradise. Ziggler is thrown to the apron and all four guys try to eliminate each other at the same time in the same spot. Santino Marella is #5 and he sends all four to the apron before loading up the Cobra. Everybody is back in and even though Santino takes Kofi down with the sock, it’s Cody backdropping Marella out.

Drew McIntyre of 3MB is #6 and gets to fight Kofi as everyone else takes a breather. Back up and it’s time to lay on the ropes while trying to eliminate people. Jericho is sent over the ropes but he keeps his feet off the ground and gets back in. Titus O’Neil is in at #7 to add some power, including taking Cody and Kofi down with a double clothesline. Cole finally tells us that the bark is a shout out to his fraternity from Florida. Thank you for explaining that to us after two years.

Jericho throws out McIntyre but can’t do the same to Ziggler as Goldust is #8. Cody gets ready for the showdown and the fans are WAY into this. They trade the kneeling uppercuts and Goldie stomps on Cody for a bit. The fans chant for Goldust and it’s David Otunga (remember him?) is in at #9. The announcers ignore the match to talk about the commentators being in the Rumble last year as people start to pair off.

Nothing much happens until Heath Slater is in at #10. That gives us Ziggler, Jericho, Rhodes, Kingston, O’Neil, Goldust, Otunga and Slater at the moment. Slater fires off right hands to Kofi as Jericho calls spots to Ziggler. Dolph gets stuck on the apron again and Sheamus is #11 to clear out some bodies. He destroys everyone with his usual stuff before sending Titus to the apron for the ten forearms. Otunga is thrown onto Titus to get rid of O’Neil before ten forearms and a Brogue Kick get rid of the lawyer. Tensai, still the Japanese lunkhead, is #12.

Everybody goes after Tensai to make a big cluster in the corner. That goes nowhere at all so Brodus Clay comes in at #13. We get a Tons of Funk preview before Goldust backdrops Cody to the apron, only to get pulled to the apron as well. Cody gets back in and sends Goldust into the post for the elimination and a lot of booing. Rey Mysterio is #14 to make the crowd happy again. Ziggler and Jericho get quick 619s and the top rope splash crushes Jericho. Things slow down a bit until we reach the halfway point with Darren Young at #15.

A bunch of guys join forces to dump Brodus and Kofi puts out Tensai a few seconds later. Now we get to the part that everybody was waiting on as Kofi is knocked off the apron, only to land on Tensai’s back. He jumps onto the announcers’ table as he tries to figure this out. Why he doesn’t just jump two feet to get onto the steps is beyond me. Bo Dallas is #16 as this is going on. Instead of the steps, Kofi gets JBL’s office chair and pogos his way back to the ring. Kingston pulls Darren out of the ring but gets caught with the Disaster Kick for the elimination before he can get back inside.

Godfather gives us the nostalgia pop at #17 and is dropkicked out by Ziggler four seconds later. He seems ok with that and leaves with his women. The whole point was the entrance anyway so I have no issue with that. Wade Barrett is in at #18 as the ring is getting too full. Everything slows down again and John Cena is #19 to clear out some tired people. Everybody gets ready for him so Cena comes a charging. John fights them all off and throws out Slater and Cody but can’t dump Jericho.

Damien Sandow is #20, giving us Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Mysterio, Dallas, Barrett, Cena and Sandow. Mysteiro and Barrett fight to the apron and a big forearm puts Rey out. Sheamus goes right after Wade as Jericho tries to put Cena in the Walls. Daniel Bryan is #21 and fires off kicks to Sandow. Now it’s Barrett getting the kicks as everyone else is down. Sheamus and Bryan try to put Jericho out but he slides back in under the ropes.

Antonio Cesaro is in at #22 and gets in a fight with Sheamus as the fans start the dueling Cena chants. Everybody is back up now and Great Khali is #23. It’s chops all around until things calm a bit. Kane comes in at #24 to fire things up again (get it?) but the ring is too full. It gets even worse with Zach Ryder coming in at #25 but HELL NO dumps Khali. Bryan dumps Kane but Cesaro dumps Bryan into Kane’s arms. Daniel: YES! Kane shouts no and drops Bryan for the elimination in a funny bit.

Randy Orton is #26 and it’s powerslams all around. Ziggler and Dallas get a double Elevated DDT and it’s an RKO for Ryder, followed by the elimination. Jinder Mahal gets lucky #27 as Cesaro lifts Cena up, only to be eliminated himself. Ziggler gets launched to the ropes but slides back in as Miz is #28. He gets in a fight with Cesaro in the aisle and limps into the ring to sell the ankle injury from earlier. Sheamus dumps Mahal and Sin Cara is #29.

Cara tries an enziguri on Ziggler which misses by four inches but Ziggler sells it anyway. Bo Dallas pulls Barrett out in an elimination that should have led further than it did. Miz sends Jericho to the apron as Barrett pulls Dallas out from the floor. Ryback is #30 to give us a final grouping of Ryback, Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Cena, Sandow, Orton, Miz and Sin Cara. Damien is out first and Sin Cara quickly follows. Miz tries to power Ryback out and is tossed as well to get us down to six. Jericho is somehow still alive and hits a Lionsault on Cena but the springboard dropkick doesn’t eliminate Sheamus.

Ziggler backdrops Jericho to the apron and superkicks him out (missed as well but he’s spent at this point) but walks into an RKO. There’s one for Cena as well and Sheamus gets the third. That leaves Ryback to fight Orton but the monster gets taken down with an Elevated DDT. Ryback fights off the RKO and clotheslines Randy out to get us down to four. Ziggler DDTs Cena down but a Brogue Kick puts Dolph on the floor.

It’s Sheamus, Ryback and Cena with Ryback getting double suplexed down. Cena and Sheamus make things serious by LOOKING AT THE SIGN. John takes over but Ryback runs him over with a clothesline. Sheamus escapes the Shell Shock, looks at the sign, and hits White Noise on Ryback. The Brogue Kick is countered with a backdrop to eliminate Sheamus and we’re down to two.

They LOOK AT THE SIGN and do their signature taunts before Ryback spinebusters Cena down. The Meathook is countered into the STF and Ryback passes out, leaving him as dead weight. Ryback fights out of the corner and Cena’s head into the mat. He loads up a powerslam but Cena slips out the back and shoves Ryback out for the win and title shot at Wrestlemania.

Rating: B. It’s a good but not great Rumble. That being said, there was almost no other option to win here, even though it set up the rematch that no one wanted to see. There’s certainly some good stuff in it and there were no down spots, but you would expect more big moments than we got here.

Coming Home ad for Wrestlemania. That still should have been Wrestlemania XXX.

We recap CM Punk vs. The Rock. It’s a basic story: Punk has been champion for 434 days and Rock is getting a title shot because he’s the Rock, which was kind of a lame reason, especially when the shot was announced six months ago. That began a countdown that made everything Punk did meaningless, because there was no way it would be anyone but Rock taking the belt from him here. Yeah Punk got in some shots on Rock before the match, but this was as much of a layup as you could get. Also if Shield or anyone interferes, Punk is stripped of the title.

Rock, after waiting for them to chant his name, says he isn’t worried about Shield, even though they busted up his lung recently. He goes on a rant about how many hard things he’s been through, but redeems himself a bit by talking about his mom getting cancer but beating it to be here tonight. Punk has said that the people don’t count but Rock says every single one of them count to him. He reaches his hand out to everyone that believes in the Rock so he can get their power, if you smell what he’s cooking.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Punk of course has Heyman with him. He charges right into the brawl and actually pounds Rock down into the corner. A quick Rock Bottom is countered but Punk is sent outside. Rock follows him outside and sends the champion into the barricade before loading up the announce table. Punk comes back with a shot to the ribs and puts the table back together in a great bit. Back in and Rock scores with more right hands to knock Punk to the floor again.

Punk is whipped into the barricade one more time but he gets a boot up to stop a charging Bull. He finishes fixing the announce table instead of following up on Rock before dropping Rock ribs first on the barricade. They head inside again for a body vice from CM followed by a knee to the ribs for two. Off to a freaky looking hold where Punk pins Rock’s shoulders down but pulls back on his head to crank on the shoulders and back.

More choking follows and a knee to the back has Rock on the apron, followed by a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Punk tries a top rope ax handle to take Rock down but injures his knee in the process. Rock scores with some kicks to the knee but the champion easily sends him out to the floor to stop the comeback. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline and reinjures the knee, giving Rock his opening.

A DDT gets one on Punk but he fights out of the Rock Bottom. The GTS is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but Punk counters into the Anaconda Vice in a nice sequence. Rock rolls over into a cradle, forcing Punk to let go of the hold. Back up and tries the Rock Bottom but Punk counters into a rollup for two, only to be countered into a low seated Sharpshooter. Punk is next to the rope so naturally he takes thirty seconds to get the break.

Rock takes him to the floor and loads up the announce table again. They fight on top but Rock counters a GTS attempt into what was supposed to be a Rock Bottom but was really more like the table collapsing with Rock’s arm around Punk’s chest. Rock comes up holding his knee and both guys make it back in at an eight count. Punk scores with a high kick but both guys are down.

Back up and Rock wins a slugout before scoring with the spinebuster. He loads up the People’s Elbow and there go the lights. Cole can see Shield pulling Rock to the floor and powerbombing him through the table. The lights come back up and Rock is laid out as the referee has no idea what’s going on. The announcers try to tell Mike Chioda what happened and Punk feigns innocence.

He throws Rock back in for the pin and celebrates but here’s Vince to say Punk is stripped of the title for the interference. Rock says no and to restart the match. The bell rings again and Punk stomps away as JBL threatens to put Cole through a table for playing cheerleader. The Macho Elbow gets two but the GTS is countered into a spinebuster, setting up the People’s Elbow to end Punk’s reign.

Rating: B. It’s another good match but it felt like they were dancing around for twenty three minutes before we got to the obvious ending. The Shield stuff was a decent fake out but it really didn’t need to be there. Rock winning was obvious though and that really put a ceiling on how high this was going to get.

Rock celebrates for about three minutes to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Yeah it’s a good show overall, but the major problem is obvious: there was no other possibly ending other than Rock vs. Cena at Wrestlemania 29 and almost everyone knew it. The show is definitely entetaining and actually really good at times, but it was so telegraphed up and down the card that it offers almost no excitement at all, even on the initial viewing. Still though, worth checking out if you have nothing else to do.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

Original: B

Redo: C-

HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

Original: C

Redo: C

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: B

The Rock vs. CM Punk

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

That original overall rating is too high for what I gave everything else. Also I think the original last man standing match rating is closer to the accurate one. It just didn’t hold up as well on a second viewing, but it was good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/27/royal-rumble-2013-by-the-book-and-still-awesome/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2013 (Original): I’m As Shocked As You Are

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2013
Date: January 27, 2013
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

As the tag line for the show says, FINALLY we’re here. The main events tonight are Punk defending against The Rock and of course the Rumble itself. The shows have been rather awesome lately so hopefully they can keep things going tonight. Hopefully things don’t change that much between tonight and Wrestlemania but odds are they will. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro is defending and this is mainly happening because of Ric Flair, as Flair was on Miz’s talk show and Cesaro interrupted. Flair “gave” Miz the Figure Four and apparently that’s Miz’s big weapon here tonight. A fast rollup gets one for Miz but Cesaro grabs a headlock to slow things down. Miz comes back with a back elbow for two and hooks a headlock on his own on the mat.

Miz hits the rope and charges into a kind of tilt-a-whirl powerslam to shift momentum again. Off to a bow and arrow hold by the champion which doesn’t last long. A sitout slam gets two for Cesaro and a European uppercut keeps Miz down. There’s the gutwrench suplex for two and Cesaro pounds away in the corner. Miz charges into a kind of Irish Curse for two and a jumping double stomp keeps him in trouble.

Cesaro hooks a double arm lock which is quickly broken, allowing Miz to hit the Reality Check for no cover. Miz pounds away in the corner and hits the running clothesline but the ax handle misses. He may have injured his knee on the landing. They trade rollups for two each and Miz goes after the knee. The Figure Four is easily blocked so Miz kicks him to the floor instead. Cesaro lures Miz in and sends him into a piece of metal under the ring, setting up the Neutralizer to retain at 7:40.

Rating: C-. This was your basic Raw match which is to say nothing special. Miz is floundering right now and this stupid Figure Four stuff is making it even worse. He needs a big moment to really hammer in the change but more than that he’s still the same guy he’s been for years. I actually like his in ring stuff, but he needs to stick with the Finale and be a bit nicer about things. It would help a lot.

On with the show!

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

Last man standing with Del Rio defending. After Big Show’s entrance, we cut to the back where Alberto and Ricardo are getting ready. Bret Hart of all people pops up and says that he’s proud of Alberto. Hart sees Del Rio as a Mexican Bret Hart while Del Rio sees Hart as a Canadian Del Rio. Ricardo says he’s a big fan so Bret gives him some sunglasses. I have no idea what the point of this cameo was but it wasn’t bad.

Show chops him into the corner to start and gets seven off a series of shows to the chest. He loads up that reverse powerbomb of his but gets caught in a hurricanrana to put him down. A top rope seated senton takes Big Show down again but the armbreaker is easily countered into something resembling a one armed Angle Slam.

Show heads to the floor to grab a chair but Alberto dropkicks the knee out and cracks the chair over Show’s back a few times. Then he pounds it into the ribs even more but another huge show is deflected and Show hits a chokeslam for an eight. Del Rio rolls to the floor where Show slams him down onto the floor. Alberto kicks him low and superkicks him to get a nine count.

The Big Bald kind of swats Alberto into the floor before throwing him into a piece of the set. Show misses a superkick into said piece of the set so he whacks Del Rio in the back with a light bulb that doesn’t break. Instead Big Show loads up a table in front of that piece of the set. Show climbs onto the set and pulls Del Rio up onto it with him with one arm. A hip toss/chokeslam through the table (it wasn’t a huge fall) gets nine and Show is ticked off. They head back to the ring but Del Rio heads to the floor to hide from the KO punch. Show follows him out and loads up the steps but can’t hit the champion.

Ricardo tries to jump Big Show but gets thrown into the barricade for his efforts. Show misses a spear and crashes through the barricade for a close nine count. Alberto hits a bunch of chair shots to the back and hits a kind of Conchairto on the shoulder using the steps. Then he sprays Show with a fire extinguisher as Show staggers back inside. Is that really going to keep him down? Back in and the cross armbreaker goes on as Ricardo uses duct tape to tie Show’s legs to the ropes ala Cena vs. Batista. Alberto lets go of the hold and wins the match at 17:00.

Rating: B. Good match here but not as fun or special as their first match. I don’t think most people thought Show was getting the title back here so they had a big mountain to get over. Still though, they did a good job of beating each other up here to set up a kind of goofy ending. I’m not wild on Del Rio having to use something clever to beat Show when he had already beaten him using force before. Still though, solid stuff here.

Striker is with Ziggler, AJ and Langston in the back. Ziggler is going to enter at #1 because he can. Matt says that’s hard to do (remember that Ziggler had to pick #1 or #2, and there’s such a HUGE difference between 1 and 2) so AJ gets in his face. Langston then cracks me up by going into an impersonation of a stereotypical nerdy news reporter asking Ziggler on his thoughts on his chances. Ziggler says he’ll win both titles at Mania. That was awesome by Langston. The others, not so much.

We get a medley of promos from people in the Rumble ala the old days.

Cesaro says he’ll win because he’s foreign.

Young and Titus do their thing.

Orton says he’s winning because he’s awesome.

Cena says what you would expect him to say.

Barrett says he’ll be the first Intercontinental Champion to win the Rumble.

Sheamus says he can win his second in a row because of the Brogue Kick.

Ryback says he isn’t a predator and he doesn’t eat Fruity Pebbles. Just feed him more. He might not be so hungry if he ate Fruity Pebbles.

Tag Titles: Rhodes Scholars vs. HELL NO

The Scholars are getting what is probably their 95th title shot in a few weeks. Bryan and Rhodes start things off with Cody having a leap frog countered into a surfboard. Off to Kane as JBL goes into a mini rant on Dr. Shelby. Kane fights out of the heel corner and slams the now legal Sandow. Bryan comes back in to fire off the kicks as JBL goes off about the hugging on Raw.

Kane kicks Sandow through the ropes and Cody is thrown on top of him. Bryan hits a suicide dive (JBL: “THE FLYING GOAT VEGAN!”) to take out both challengers and the fans seem fired up. Back in and Cody gets in a few shots to take over with a half Boston crab as the announcers talk about 1980s TV. Sandow comes in for the Wind-Up Elbow and some stomping for two. Cody comes back in and gets kicked in the face to take him down. Sandow blocks the hot tag though and brings Cody right back in.

Rhodes hooks an over the shoulder backbreaker for a bit but once the hold is released, Bryan hits a running DDT to take Cody down. Kane finally gets the tag (no reaction) and house is cleaned with Sandow taking a side slam for two. Kane loads up the top rope clothesline (JBL: “That’s a flying taker.”) but Sandow breaks it up. A kind of running swinging neckbreaker gets two for Damien but Cody comes in for a double suplex. Bryan makes a blind tag at the same time though and it’s a chokeslam for Cody and the NO Lock for Sandow for the tap out at 9:30.

Rating: C. Average tag match here, but the booking was pretty dull. To clarify, the Scholars lost every match leading up to the title match, then lost the title match? Well you can’t say one thing doesn’t lead to another I guess. Then again, I would have avoided having the Scholars lose EVERY SINGLE TIME they fought the champions but why would you want to add drama?

Rumble by the Numbers.

Vickie gives HELL NO their numbers for the Rumble. Kane sees Bryan’s and says interesting. Bryan wants to see Kane’s and jokes ensue. Ron Simmons unfortunately doesn’t show up.

We recap Fan Fest which had the NXT tournament.

Royal Rumble

This is earlier than I was expecting. 90 second intervals and Ziggler is #1. He says he’s going to be here at the beginning and at the end. Ziggler doesn’t care who #2 is so he doesn’t mind when……CHRIS JERICHO is #2??? Jericho has a big tattoo on his left arm now and if you remember correctly, Ziggler got Jericho fired last year. Ziggy throws him to the apron but Jericho comes back with a top rope forearm to the head. Jericho clotheslines him to the apron but Ziggler gets right back in. Cody Rhodes is #3 and the double teaming begins.

Ziggler gets knocked down and Cody is put in the Walls, only to be quickly broken up (or down?) by Dolph. Kofi is #4 and Dolph has to duck Trouble in Paradise. Cody and Jericho both try to dump Kofi to no avail and we enter into the lame brawling section. Santino is #5 and throws Cody and Jericho to the apron but no further. The Cobra takes Kofi down but Ziggler superkicks Santino out. The heels double team Kofi but can’t put him out.

Drew McIntyre is #6 and more heel alliances form. Jericho BARELY survives being thrown out by dangling until Titus O’Neal is #7. He picks up Kofi and does the Millions of Dollars dance before hitting him with a backbreaker. McIntyre is sent to the apron and kicked out by Jericho. Ziggler is sent upside down on the ropes but hangs on at the last second. The fans chant for Jericho as Goldust returns at #8.

Goldie goes right for Cody to a big pop and there’s the kneeling uppercut. Cody hangs on to avoid elimination as the fans cheer for Goldust. Otunga is #9 as the ring is getting too full. JBL goes into a weird series of insults to Lawler about how Cole kept beating him which goes nowhere. Heath Slater is #10 as we need someone to come in here and clean some people out. Jericho puts Ziggler onto the apron again but can’t get him out.

Sheamus is #11 and after a bunch of forearms he dumps Titus and Otunga. Slater tries to jump Sheamus resulting in a big heel beatdown. Tensai is #12, giving us Ziggler, Jericho, Rhodes, Slater, Goldust, Kofi, Sheamus and Tensai. Cole talks about Jake Roberts being the first person to eliminate someone in 1998 (you read that right) as people keep fighting by the ropes. Brodus Clay is #13 complete with the Funkadactyls who are rocking some shorts.

There are way too many guys in there at the moment as Goldust sends Rhodes to the apron. Cody pulls his brother to the apron and slides back in where he whips Goldust into the post to eliminate him. Cool sequence there. Rey Mysterio returns (kind of) at #14 in a weird looking low cut singlet. He hits a few 619s and the top rope splash on Jericho but has to fight off Rhodes.

Darren Young is #15 and joins a group of guys to eliminate Brodys. Kofi low bridges Tensai for an elimination. Ziggler knocks Kofi off the apron where he lands on Tensai’s back and is dropped onto the announce table. Kofi teases jumping off the announce table to the ring as the camera stops focusing on the match at all. He asks for JBL’s chair as Bo Dallas is #16. Kofi hops with the chair to get back to the apron and gets back in. Ok, last year it was a cool idea but this took like a minute to work which makes it WAY too much.

Kofi dumps Darren (who looked to injure his knee on the landing) but gets Disaster Kicked out by Cody. Godfather returns at #17 and is dropkicked out in two seconds by Ziggler. Gee I’m so glad they wasted this spot on him. We’ve got Ziggler, Jericho, Rhodes, Sheamus, Dallas, Mysterio, Slater and now Barrett at #18. Barrett and Jericho try to put Sheamus out but Mysterio breaks it up for no apparent reason.

Cody and Barrett are the only ones on their feet as Cena is #19. All of the heels stare him down and it’s a dog pile as he gets into the ring. There goes Slater (immediately checked on by referees) and Rhodes as well but Jericho blocks an AA attempt. Dallas goes after Cena so points to him for trying. Sandow is #20 and Rey tries to rana Barrett to the floor, only to get kicked to the floor. Sheamus goes after Barrett because that’s the law anymore.

Jericho busts out the Walls on Cena but can’t quite hook them. Now he gets them on as Daniel Bryan is #21. There are the kicks for Ziggler and some for Barrett as well. Daniel is the only one on his feet at the moment but he and Sheamus can’t put Jericho out. We get dueling Cena chants as Cesaro is #22. Nothing of note happens so Khali is #23. This is his 7th Rumble which is really surprising. WAY too many people in there again.

Ziggler hits a kind of stunner on Cena as Cesaro tries to put Sheamus out. Kane is #24 and sends Ziggler to the apron for about the 17th time. More people lay around until Zack Ryder is #25. There’s a Rough Ryder for Dolph and Kane dumps Khali. Bryan dumps Kane but Cesaro knocks Bryan right into Kane’s arms. Kane isn’t sure what to do but eventually he drops Bryan to the floor, more or less turning him heel for one night only.

Orton is #26 and fires off a bunch of clotheslines and a powerslam for Ziggler. Bo Dallas manages to stay in, only to be caught in a double Elevated DDT at the same time as Ziggler. Ryder eats and RKO and is gone. Jinder Mahal gets lucky #27 as we now have ten guys in there at once. Cena dumps Cesaro and slingshots Ziggler to the apron but can’t put him out. The Miz is #28 and gets in a fight with Cesaro in the aisle. Apparently Miz has a bad ankle from the pre show match and is limping a bit.

Sheamus knocks Mahal out and Miz hits the Reality Check on Cena. Sin Cara gets #29 and totally misses a kick to Ziggler’s head as he comes in. Sheamus puts Cena on the apron as Bo Dallas pulls Wade Barrett out in a big surprise. Miz and Jericho fight on the apron as Barrett pulls Dallas out of the match. There’s Dallas’ first feud I guess. The Bull Hammer lays Dallas out as well. Ryback gets #30, giving us WAY too many people for me to list at the moment.

Ryback dumps Sandow and Sin Cara and glares at Miz for trying to toss him. There goes Miz and we’re down to six: Jericho, Ziggler, Cena, Sheamus, Orton and Ryback. Jericho fires things up and dropkicks Sheamus to the apron but poses too much and gets superkicked out by Dolph. Orton and Sheamus go at it which is probably a title match at Mania. Ryback goes shoulder first into the post and walks into an RKO as does Cena. RKO to Sheamus and an Elevated DDT to Ryback but there’s no one on their feet to eliminate.

Ryback counters an RKO and clotheslines Orton out. The Brogue Kick knocks out Ziggler at roughly 50 minutes and we’re down to three. It’s Cena, Sheamus and Ryback left and Ryback gets double teamed. Now the two superheroes look at the sign and slug it out. Cena fires off his finishing sequence by Ryback breaks up the Shuffle with a Meathook. Sheamus escapes Shell Shock and hits White Noise on Ryback. The pale one loads up the Brogue Kick but gets dumped out by Ryback.

So we’re down to Cena vs. Ryback and after a catchphrase battle, Cena walks into a spinebuster. There’s the STF to Ryback and the bald one passes out. Cena tries to pick him up but Ryback is dead weight. Cena is fine with that though and sits Ryback on the top, only to get caught in a kind of Thesz Press off the top. Ryback puts him in a kind of powerslam position but Cena escapes and throws him out to win at 54:50.

Rating: C+. I’ve seen worse but this wasn’t the best Rumble or even close to it. The first part was pretty dull stuff after Jericho returned and after that it didn’t pick up for a good while. Cena winning was kind of predictable but that doesn’t mean it’s the wrong choice. I’m really not wild on him facing either Rock or Punk, but maybe he’ll go after the World Heavyweight Championship. Well not likely as that title doesn’t exist at Mania time but it was worth a try.

We recap Rock vs. Punk which means the Divas Title match got scrapped. That’s likely a good idea. Anyway you should know this by now: Punk doesn’t like Rock because he thinks Rock has too much handed to him while Rock got this shot because he won a match nine months ago. The main idea here is that Shield might interfere against Punk’s wishes but if they do, Rock gets the title.

Rock goes on a rant about not getting drafted into the NFL which turns into a longer rant about adversity and his mom having cancer. Oh she’s here tonight. That’s a relief. Anyway, Rock talks about Punk saying the fans don’t count but insists they do. He reaches out his hand ala Dusty Rhodes in Hard Times (look it up) and says tonight he and the fans are one. Good ending to an oddly started promo.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Shield attacked Rock on Monday so he has some bad ribs. Rock wins a fast slugout but can’t hit the Rock Bottom. Punk gets knocked to the floor but gets in a shot to Rocky to slow him up. The champ (Punk) loads up the Spanish announce table….and then puts it right back where he found it. Well at least Mama Punk taught him well. Rock sends Punk into the barricade so Heyman hits him in the back. Heyman: “MOMMY!” CM comes back and messes with the table again before we head back inside.

Punk hooks a bodyscissors to slow things down and knees Rock in the stomach for two. Off to something like the cousin of the Anaconda Vice before Rock comes back with some right hands. Punk will have none of that as he leg lariats Rock right back down. Rock gets draped over the top rope as we get a dueling catchphrase chant (Knees 2 Faces and Rock’s version of the same line).

Punk fires off a kick to send Rock to the floor but he might have hurt his knee in the process. He goes up top and hits a forearm to the head but hurts his knee again in the process. The suicide dive keeps Rock down as they seem to be in second gear or so here. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline so Rock goes after the bad knee for the first time. Both finishers are blocked as is the Sharpshooter but Punk counters into the Vice.

In a smart move, Rock rolls over into a cover so Punk has to leg go to escape. A DDT puts Punk down for no cover but Punk rolls through the Rock Bottom. Now the Sharpshooter is hooked but Punk finally makes a rope. Rock loads up the announce table but doesn’t set it back like Punk did. If nothing else, Punk wins the manners battle. Punk gets placed on the table but escapes with a kick to the face. A GTS is countered into the Rock Bottom but the table collapses underneath them. Rock is holding his knee but pulls off a Rock Bottom on the floor, presumably to buy some time.

That gets two back inside and Rock’s knee seems ok. That’s a good sign. Rock picks Punk up but gets caught by the high kick to put both guys down. A slugout goes to the Great One and there’s the flying clothesline to set up the spinebuster. Rock loads up the People’s Elbow….and there go the lights.

We can hear something happening at the announce table and flashes of light show the Shield. Rock is put through the announce table but the referee didn’t see it so the match doesn’t end. DOES VINCE NOT WATCH THESE SHOWS??? Punk is all like “oh dear what an unfortunate turn of events.” He insists he has nothing to do with the Shield and rolls Rock back in….for the pin at 21:30.

Rating: B. Good stuff here but they didn’t hit their stride until the middle of the match. The Shield stuff is pretty stupid if it stands as Vince isn’t stupid enough (kayfabe of course) to let it go. Rock looked like his usual self but this was nowhere near as good as Cena vs. Rock at Wrestlemania. It’s good, but it’s not great.

Thankfully Vince comes out and says not so fast my friend. He says that he saw the Shield so as Chairman he has to….be cut off by Rock. Rock says Vince doesn’t take the title from Punk because that’s what Rock is here for. He wants the match restarted and Vince says do it. Punk immediately stomps Rock down in the corner and hits the running knee. There’s the Macho Elbow for two more as the fans are getting into this. The GTS is escaped and there’s the People’s Elbow for the pin and the title at 26:47. There was only about two minutes of extra stuff so the old rating stays, but MAN that was a fast ending for Punk’s reign.

Overall Rating: A-. This was a pretty awesome show but the ending was kind of sketchy. Anyway, Rock vs. Cena II is set up, presumably with Punk getting his rematch next month. I’m not wild on the way Punk lost the title as it wasn’t even to the Rock Bottom. I mean, if he can spinebust Punk can’t he hit the Rock Bottom? Either way, good stuff here and I can’t say I’m complaining about Rock winning the title again. Very good but not excellent show here.

Results

Alberto Del Rio b. Big Show – Big Show couldn’t answer the ten count

HELL NO b. Rhodes Scholars – NO Lock

John Cena won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Ryback

The Rock b. CM Punk – People’s Elbow

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2012 (2013 Redo): Gotcha!

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2012
Date: January 29, 2012
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 18,121
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

We wrap things up here with last year’s show. The Rumble is back to the thirty entrant variety which is probably the best move all around. The odds on favorite is Jericho who returned very recently before this show. Other than that we’ve got Daniel Bryan defending his newly won world title against Big Show and Henry in a cage, along with Punk defending against Ziggler. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of course about going to Wrestlemania.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry

Bryan is champion and beat Show at TLC by cashing in his MITB case in 45 seconds. Show beat Henry at the same show and ran over Bryan’s girlfriend AJ on Raw to set all this up. This is one fall to a finish and it’s pin/submission/escape. Bryan immediately goes for the corner but Henry pulls him down and Show runs Bryan over for two. Show crushes Henry against the cage wall but has to stop to pull Bryan back inside. Bryan tries to run up again but Show catches him by the ankle and slams him back in.

Show loads up the WMD but hits the cage wall instead. The champion fires off some kicks but gets headbutted right back down. Bryan kicks the knee out even harder and fires off some kicks to Henry to keep the other monster down. He goes for the door but you know this isn’t ending that quickly. Henry makes the stop and demands that the referee CLOSE THAT DOOR. Show superkicks Henry down and it’s his turn to take over for awhile.

Bryan gets slammed down but Henry is back up again. A few punches put Show down because a dozen chair shots usually can’t, but a few punches can. Actually that’s a great way to keep Henry looking strong. The fans are cheering for Bryan as Henry and Show collide to put all three guys down. Show gets back up and clotheslines Bryan down a few times before superkicking him in the face. The chokeslam is countered and Bryan hits a tornado DDT on Show for two.

The LeBell (NO!) Lock is put on Show but Henry breaks it up in about a second. The WMD gets two on Henry but Bryan makes the save, which ticks Show off. Bryan SPRINTS up the cage but Show chases after him and grabs Bryan before he can get out. Bryan sits on the top of the cage and pounds away, only to be caught again. The champion is literally hanging from Show’s wrist before finally letting go and falling to the floor to retain the title.

Rating: D+. This really wasn’t all that great. At the end of the day, it was a lot of the same sequence over and over again with Show and Henry not having a ton of interaction at all. The ending didn’t look great either and I’m not sure why Show would just hold him out over the floor like that. This falls under the category of “…..really?” as it’s hard to buy Bryan keeping the belt here.

Long video on Cena and all the stuff he does for WWE. The man is insanely committed to that company.

Divas of Doom/Bella Twins vs. Eve Torres/Alicia Fox/Tamina/Kelly Kelly

The Divas of Doom are Beth and Natalya. Natalya and Tamina start things off and they collide a few times. Tamina slaps her in the face before chopping Nattie down for two. Off to Eve for that bouncing moonsault for two. Since that’s a pretty lame move, Natalya charges her into the corner and brings in Beth who blocks a rolling splash with knees to Eve’s back.

Off to let’s say Nikki for some basic stomps to the back and a quickly broken chinlock. Jerry is asked what he likes about the Bellas and he can’t even get an answer out. Not hot tag brings in Alicia who is immediately sent into the corner and chinlocked as well. Alicia finally counters by flipping Nikki forward and makes the actual hot tag to Kelly. There’s the screaming headscissors and a faceplant for two. Everything breaks down and almost everyone heads to the floor, where Kelly hits a HUGE dive to take everyone out. Back in and Beth SLAPS herself in to hit the Glam Slam on Kelly for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was your usual Divas match: they did their “sexy” spots, they had barely there outfits, Kelly screamed a lot, Beth beat up Kelly to end things. One interesting note from a year later: would they even be able to put together an eight Divas tag now? I’m thinking through the roster and I don’t know if I can name eight girls on the main shows right now.

We recap Ryder getting hurt at the hands of Kane. This was during the period where Ryder went from one of the hottest things in the company and US Champion to a rag doll that Kane destroyed over and over and over in the span of a few weeks until his push was completely destroyed. Eve blamed Cena for Ryder having his back broken for some reason.

Ryder is wheeled in and patronized by Johnny Ace (remember him?). Ace has a private room set up for Ryder but Eve comes up to yell at Ace first. Not much here but it’s setting up stuff later on tonight.

Kane vs. John Cena

This is when Kane had the welder’s mask look. Brawl to start with Kane beating Cena down into the corner as the fans are split on Johnny. A clothesline puts them both on the floor where Kane is sent knees first into the steps. Back in and Cena can’t hit the AA on Kane. That makes sense as after all, Kane is probably 175lbs lighter than Show who Cena throws around with near ease most of the time.

Kane kicks Cena down and gets two off an uppercut. A suplex gets the same and it’s off to a chinlock. Cena fights up and is sent into the buckle for his efforts followed by Kane’s stupid smother hold. John tries to counter into a Crossface but Kane comes out with a side slam. The idea here is that Cena can’t get anything going at all. The top rope clothesline takes Cena’s head off but Cena pops up and hits his shoulder block.

The Shuffle is countered by a grab of Cena’s throat and a big boot gets two. Cena blocks a superplex and hits the Shuffle off the top. That’s certainly a new one. The AA is countered by an elbow to the face and Kane kicks Cena out to the floor. Booker talks about how Cena is a good kid. I don’t think I ever recall Cena being called a kid since like 2004. Kane pounds on Cena in the aisle and that’s a double countout so we can do this match again next month.

Rating: D+. I know that’s a common theme tonight but it fits here again. These two didn’t work all that well together and the story was even worse. Then again, this was nothing more than giving Cena something to do for a few months until he could get ready for the biggest match of his career. This didn’t work for the most part.

The fight continues into the back where Kane finds a chair to lay to lay out Cena. To the shock of no one paying attention, Kane finds the door to Ryder’s private room and kicks the door in. Ryder is taken to the ring and tombstoned as Eve screams. Cena comes out to try to save Eve but gets chokeslammed by Kane who walks away. Ryder does a stretcher job, but somehow it would get even worse for him in the coming weeks.

BE A STAR!

Zack is wheeled out and Cena is booed for it. That’s the part of this story that never held up for me: why is this Cena’s responsibility? Ryder was the United States Champion. He should be able to defend himself.

We get a video on the Rock just like Cena got earlier. It’s shot in the back of Rock’s car and is more like a mini documentary. It focuses on how insane Rock’s life is and all of the stuff he does around the world.

Drew McIntyre vs. Brodus Clay

This is right after Brodus redebuted as the Funkasaurus so he was still a new character at this point. Brodus dances a lot, Drew punches him in the corner, Brodus headbutts him and hits the cross body (called WHAT THE FUNK) for the pin in about a minute.

Buy Slim Jims! For the troops!

We recap Punk vs. Ziggler who is challenging Punk on Ace’s behalf. This is during the “Ace is boring” phase where Punk made fun of him no matter what he did, so Ace helped Ziggler get a win over Punk to earn a title shot. Ace is also guest referee tonight just because. He’s openly admitted he’s going to screw Punk out of the title tonight, so HHH is going to evaluate his job status the next night on Raw, meaning Ace has to play nice.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler

Punk is defending and Ace is referee. Johnny Ace is John Laurinitis but that’s a hard name to spell. Before the match, Ace says he’ll be the outside referee. Ok then. Wait we’re still not ready to go as Ace throws Vickie out as well. We finally get going and Ziggler tries a quick Fameasser which is countered into a failed GTS attempt. Punk tells Dolph it was that close. They feel each other out a bit longer until Ziggler starts strutting.

Punk finally gets his hands on Ziggler and puts on an abdominal stretch, complete with a wrapped toe and slicking back his hair ala Ziggler. Dolph heads to the floor and gets taken out by a suicide dive but shoves Punk off the top rope once they get back inside. Ziggler drops about eight elbows in a row and a jumping version gets two. We hit the chinlock with Ziggler cranking on the head way more than necessary.

The champ starts firing off chops and strikes before getting caught in the sleeper. That goes nowhere but neither does Punk’s Anaconda Vice attempt. Back to the sleeper but Dolph can’t get it on all the way. Instead there’s a perfect dropkick for two on Punk but the Fameasser is countered into a helicopter bomb for two. A swinging neckbreaker by the champ puts Dolph into the corner where the knee/bulldog combination actually works.

The GTS is countered into a slingshot but Punk lands on the middle rope. He comes off with a spinning cross body but Ziggler rolls through for a near fall in a cool sequence. The high kick gets two for Punk as does the Macho Elbow, drawing a Randy Savage chant. The GTS is countered again and the referee goes down as per the requirement in a world title mach. Punk hooks the Vice but Ace is checking on the down referee. Then Punk gets a rollup and there’s STILL no referee.

Ace sends the referee back in as Punk loads up the GTS, but Ziggler’s legs knock Ace to the floor. Ace sees the pin but refuses to count because he thinks Punk did it on purpose. Ziggler counters another GTS attempt into the Fameasser for two before pounding away a bit. The champ comes back with a slingshot and the GTS gets a pin from both referees to retain the title.

Rating: B+. This took awhile to get going as we were all waiting on the Ace stuff. The feud would go on for weeks until Jericho finally showed up to give Punk someone with charisma to feud with. The near falls at the end were a lot better than Ace, but it occurs to me that this was pretty much the same match he had last year. Good stuff though.

Rumble by the Numbers:

30 Superstars

1 winner

31 Hall of Famers in the Rumble

21 main events those Hall of Famers have been in at Wrestlemania

695 entrants who have been eliminated

39 entrants eliminated by Michaels, a record (Kane is second at 35)

13 consecutive Rumbles for Kane

11 eliminations for Kane in 2001

194,107lbs that have been in the Rumble, or over 97 tons, or 430 Big Show

421,883 people who have attended the Rumble

62:12 Rey Mysterio spent in the Rumble in 2006, a record

3 wins for Austin

1 second that Santino lasted in 2009

2 women who have competed in the Rumble

1, the entrant that has produced the same amount of winners as #30 at two each

27, the entrant with more winners than any other at four

55 percent of winners that have won the title at Wrestlemania

Royal Rumble

The Miz is #1 and talks about how he’s going back to the main event of Wrestlemania this year. His former apprentice Alex Riley is #2 which isn’t really surprising given how RANDOM these draws are. I always liked Riley and he always got a good reaction, which is clearly why he doesn’t get on TV more. Riley pounds away to start and runs Miz over with a forearm but walks into a big boot. Maybe it’s the old school fan in me but I don’t like a 6’0 guy using a big boot. Miz talks trash and low bridges Riley out with ease.

R-Truth, Miz’s former partner, is #3. Truth fires off some kicks and avoids the Finale before hitting a kind of powerslam. Miz gets sent to the apron for the second time but Truth turns his back to watch Cody come out at #4. A quick Disaster Kick puts Truth down (Cole says it hits Miz because those two are so hard to tell apart) and Truth gets double teamed for awhile. He manages to send Cody to the apron but gets caught in the Reality Check as the clock seems to be speeding up.

Justin Gabriel is #5 and things speed WAY up. A big spinwheel kick puts Miz down before Cody goes nuts on Gabriel in the corner. Primo is #6 to keep things low key to start. Actually he speeds things up as well and hits a sweet headscissors out of the corner to take Gabriel down. Truth hits the spinning forearm on Cody, only to be dumped out by Miz a second later. Since he’s still crazy, Truth pulls Miz to the floor and lays him out on the outside.

Mick Foley is #7 to fire up the crowd a little bit. He dumps Primo almost immediately before getting beaten on by Cody. Foley looks really old and slow here but to be fair, he is in fact old and slow. In a HILARIOUS bit, Ricardo Rodriguez is #8 but comes out in an old banged up, rusted out rental car. He’s even got the Del Rio scarf to hide some of his hideous pale body. We get a HUGE Ricardo chant as Foley and Gabriel have no idea what to do here.

Ricardo takes Cody down and pounds away before proposing an alliance with Foley of all people. They actually do team up and toss Gabriel, allowing Ricardo to do a CM Punk knee slide. We keep the comedy going with Santino at #9 and Ricardo runs from the Cobra. Santino beats on Ricardo and literally rolls him around the ring before pulling his trunks up and tossing Rodriguez.

Now we get my favorite spot of the match as Santino puts on the Cobra and Mick puts on Socko and it’s TIME FOR A DUEL!!! Before they can collide though it’s Epico at #10 but he falls to the powers of the socks and is out almost immediately. The socks COLLIDE until Miz and Cody pop back in (neither was eliminated) and dump Santino. Miz gets Socko but Cody dumps Mick. Fun comedy bit here to give us a good first act to the match.

Kofi Kingston is #11 and hits a double springboard clothesline before hitting a double Boom Drop. In at #12 is Jerry Lawler (Cole: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING???”) and he causes Miz to hit Cody by mistake. Lawler speeds things up and hits the middle rope punch with the lowered strap, only to be put out by Cody. Ezekiel Jackson is #13 and gets to do the usual power moves on each guy while the others lay around.

Jinder Mahal is #14 and the fans start chanting USA, even though the only two Americans in this match are Rhodes and Miz. Great Khali comes in at #15 and Mahal panics. Everyone gets chops and Mahal is out in just a few seconds. Jackson tries to pound away and is put out almost immediately as well. Hunico is #16 on that stupid bicycle of his and hits a spinning cross body on Miz and his Angle Slam on Cody.

Khali chops Hunico down as the ring is staying relatively empty. Booker T is #17 to surprise Cole. You would think he would have noticed that the man sitting next to him for over two hours wasn’t wearing pants but he never was considered that bright. Now we get the spot of the match as Miz shoves Kofi to the floor but Kofi holds himself up by his hands. Miz shoves Kofi into a handstand but Kingston WALKS ON HIS HANDS ACROSS THE FLOOR TO THE STEPS to get back in. FREAKING AWESOME MAN!

Dolph Ziggler is #18 as the ring is starting to get full. Hacksaw Jim Duggan makes his annual return at #19 to pop the crowd huge. He cleans house for a bit and we get a DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER on Miz and Rhodes. Cody avoids a charge in the corner though and dumps Duggan in less than a minute. That’s the best idea at the end of the day. Miz and Cody team up to put out Booker and Khali at the same time.

We complete the trio with Michael Cole at #20. At the moment we’ve got Cole, Miz, Rhodes, Kingston, Hunico and Ziggler in the ring. Kharma returns at #21 in her only WWE match ever. She hits Cole so hard she knocks his headgear off so Cole eliminates himself. Well he gets to the apron where King and Booker eliminate him. Ziggler tells Kharma to get out so she DRILLS him. Kharma dumps Hunico but Ziggler sneaks up and eliminates her (Booker calls this doing the impossible. Not really Book.) to a ton of heat.

Sheamus is #22 to give us some A level star power. Well maybe B+ level. Things speed up with Sheamus destroying everyone and tossing Kofi out. There are the ten forearms in the ropes to Cody and ten to Miz as well. The Zig Zag is countered and Road Dogg is another surprise return at #23. He gets to clean house for a bit and earns a “you still got it” chant. In far less than 90 seconds, Jey Uso is #24.

Everyone pairs off until Jack Swagger is #25. After a few suplexes everything settles down into its usual brawling phase until Barrett is #26. He throws out Roadie and stomps away on a lot of people. David Otunga gets the lucky spot at #27 and poses a lot before he comes out. Not a lot happens so Orton comes in at #28 to pick things up a bit. Remember we’re in his hometown so everyone goes nuts.

Cody breaks up the RKO on Barrett so Randy hits the Elevated DDT on both Cody and Ziggler at the same time because he can. There’s an RKO to Barrett and he’s out. Chris Jericho, complete with a blackout of the arena, makes his return at #29. He’s still a face at this point and dumps Otunga to a good reaction. Big Show is #30 which was considered a letdown at the time. Dude, he was world champion a month ago. That’s hardly Darren Young coming out.

As Show comes in he pulls Swagger out from the floor, giving us a final grouping of Miz, Rhodes, Ziggler, Sheamus, Orton, Jericho and Big Show. That’s a pretty solid grouping. Show dumps Cody and Miz at the same time to get us down to five. Show tosses Ziggler as well to get us down to four. The big man cleans house but walks into an RKO, allowing Orton and Sheamus to pick him up and Randy clotheslines him out. Jericho dumps Orton immediately thereafter and we’re down to two.

The fans are entirely behind Jericho here so Sheamus runs him over a few times. Jericho’s bulldog is countered but Sheamus can’t throw him over the corner. Jericho charges into the Irish Curse but Sheamus can’t hit the High Cross. We get a great false finish with Jericho clotheslining Sheamus to the apron and then knocking him down to the point where Sheamus is hanging on by his leg. Sheamus comes back in with the slingshot shoulder but the Brogue Kick is countered into the Walls.

After the hold is broken Jericho gets knocked to the apron where he BARELY hangs on. They go to the top rope and both fall to the apron, meaning if they hit the floor they’re out. Both guys get back in and there’s the Codebreaker to Sheamus. Jericho gets Sheamus upside down but can’t get him out. A shot to the face ticks Sheamus off and he catches a Codebreaker attempt to put Jericho on the apron. The Brogue Kick sends Sheamus to Wrestlemania.

Rating: A-. This is one of those Rumbles that is great fun as you watch it live but it loses some steam on a second viewing. They spent a bit too much time on nostalgia and funny ideas here but they were still really good ideas. The ending with Sheamus and Jericho ROCKED and I have no idea why they never got to have a long PPV match. This is a really good Rumble but it never reaches that excellent level that some of them get to.

Sheamus celebrates a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The Rumble is a unique show as it has a way to save itself from a bad first half. That’s what happened here as the last two matches were certainly good enough to save it from the horrible first few matches. As usual the last two guys would both get world title shots with the winner getting the opening match instead of the real main event, but going on before Rock vs. Cena is hardly torture.

Ratings Comparison

Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Bella Twins/Divas of Doom vs. Alicia Fox/Kelly Kelly/Eve Torres/Tamina

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Kane vs. John Cena

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Brodus Clay vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B

Redo: B+

Royal Rumble

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

Just like last year, not much difference here.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/01/29/royal-rumble-2012/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2012 (Original): The Celtic Rumble

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2012
Date: January 29, 2012
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

The Road to Wrestlemania begins tonight, even with the Elimination Chamber being in a month and messing things up all over again. The even money is on either Jericho, Orton or Sheamus as the dark horse. This probably marks the only time that he’s ever been considered dark in his life but it’s a special occasion. Oh and there are two world title matches tonight too if you care about that sort of thing. Let’s get to it.

Now we’ve been promised a great main event here tonight. They wouldn’t lie to us. Not a wrestling company.

The opening video is your usual one for something like this: everyone saying they want to go to the Rumble.

Smackdown World Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Big Show vs. Mark Henry

It says a lot when the Smackdown main event is opening the show. It’s been like 2 years since they’ve gotten a main event. Anyway, Bryan is the champion in case the zombie apocalypse has occurred and you have no access to finding out who champion was and you’ve somehow found my flash drive. Henry legit injured his knee on Smackdown so it should be interesting to see if he does much tonight.

Pin, submission or escape to win. After some big match intros we’re ready to go. Bryan goes for a quick escape but the monsters pull him down. Show takes Henry down with a quick shoulder block and then splashes him against the cage. He does it again but I guess he’s not Bobby Lashley as the cage doesn’t break, even on the third attempt. Bryan tries to escape but Show makes the save.

Show takes over and throws Bryan into the cage. The big punch hits the cage and Bryan goes after….the leg. That works about as it does every time you go after a giant’s leg and Show rams him into various things. Bryan kicks him in the knee to take him down and then goes after Bryan. Danny calls for the door to be open but Henry goes for the save. Show kicks Henry in the face to take over again.

Bryan gets thrown into the cage a bunch of times and a hard slam puts him down. Henry comes back as we’re into the regular formula of one guy stays down while the others fight. Mark misses a charge into the cage and Show spears him which Bryan gets two off of. Bryan escapes a chokeslam and tries a LeBell Lock on Show but Henry makes the save. Henry loads up the Slam on Bryan but Show knocks him out with the punch for two as Bryan saves. Bryan goes to escape but Show grabs onto him. After holding on for awhile, Bryan falls down and escapes for the win at 9:13.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and hopefully it gets Bryan away from these monsters. There’s only so much he can do against guys this size without looking ridiculous. They laid around a lot in this but that’s the accepted formula in triple threats. By that I mean one person would stay down for way too long off a basic move but Henry needed the break given his knee. Not bad but it felt like a Smackdown main event instead of a PPV title match.

Bryan does his overblown celebration post match.

Elimination Chamber promo with Amazing Grace playing over Sheamus talking.

Cena video on his mainstream media appearances and international appeal. Basically filler.

Bella Twins/Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. Eve Torres/Tamina/Alicia Fox/Kelly Kelly

Title defenses? What are those? I didn’t know Beth was alive anymore. Tamina and Natalya start us off and thankfully it lasts longer than their match this past Friday. Off to Eve who I thought turned heel. Eve does her usual stupid dancing offense and it’s off to Beth. Off to a Bella who gets two and hooks a chinlock. Booker actually asks why Lawler likes the Bellas. Alicia comes in and beats on whichever Bella that is. Does it really even matter? Off to Eve and everyone goes outside where Kelly hits a big dive. Beth slaps her way in and the Glam Slam kills Kelly dead at 5:23.

Rating: D+. The dive was cool and this was one of the better Divas matches I can remember in awhile, but is there any point to this division anymore? That’s the first time I remember seeing Beth in forever and the match was an 8 person tag instead of something for the title. When’s the last time she defended it on TV? Based on what I can find, her last three defenses have been at TLC, Survivor Series and Vengeance.

Video on Ryder being injured.

Ryder is here in a back brace and says he’s here to watch Cena beat Kane up. He runs into Johnny Ace who has a personal room ready for Zack. Eve comes up to run her mouth on Ace and calls him vindictive, pompous and a word I couldn’t understand. Eve wheels him into the dressing room.

John Cena vs. Kane

Mostly booing for Cena here. Cena goes straight for Kane but is taken down quickly. The dueling chants begin and Cena fires off punches, knocking Kane to the floor. They brawl outside and Kane goes knee first into the steps. AA doesn’t work as Cena falls forward. Off to the chinlock and the match slows way down. Cena fights up and we get the boo/yay punch sequence. Uppercut by Kane gets two as does a suplex and it’s back to the chinlock.

Cena fights up and makes a comeback but Kane punches him right back down. A corner splash hits Cena but the second is countered by a drop toehold into the middle buckle. The idea is that Cena can’t really hurt Kane, as in the story to almost all of Kane’s matches. Cena counters the smother into a Crossface. Kane escapes and a side slam gets two for the masked man. The top rope clothesline puts Cena down and here comes the chokeslam. Cena ducks it and tries his shoulder blocks but Kane pops up. ProtoBomb looks to set up the Shuffle but Kane pops up and kicks him back down.

They go to the corner and Cena knocks him off. Cena hits a top rope Five Knuckle Shuffle and tries the AA but Kane escapes. Cena goes for the knee and tries the STF but gets kicked to the floor. Kane rams him into the apron and they fight up the ramp for the double countout. I forgot to time it but it ran roughly 15 minutes.

Rating: D+. Very slow match here and pretty boring. The idea that Cena can’t hurt Kane got boring quickly and the ending didn’t help things at all. I don’t really get where they’re going with this, but I’d assume it’s going towards something about Cena being evil but rising above it. Just dull for the most part and the same stuff done over and over again.

Cena rams something that looked like equipment into Kane and they go into the backstage area. Kane is sent into trashcans which doesn’t really stop him. The Big Fried Freak grabs a chair and pops Cena with it about four times. Wouldn’t you know it we’re right next to Ryder’s dressing room? Kane goes in and smothers Ryder into presumably death.

Kane comes back out with Ryder in the wheelchair. He wheels Ryder into the ring and here’s Eve to try to make the save. This goes about as well as you would think and Ryder gets tombstoned. Cena finally comes back to fight Kane but walks into a chokeslam. Kane leaves and Ryder gets taken out on a stretcher.

Don’t Be A Bully.

Same kind of video on Rock from earlier. He talks about his movie and this is just eating up time.

Drew McIntyre vs. Brodus Clay

Remember what I said about filler? Brodus dances and jiggles as Drew hits him. A headbutt to the chest puts Drew down and there’s the suplex. I know because Brodus said suplex right before he hit it. Splash in the corner and What The Funk ends this in 1:15.

We recap Punk vs. Ziggler. Punk has been screwed by Johnny Ace multiple times now and keeps calling him a failure and all those things. Ace has finally said that he’s going to screw Punk as he’s the guest referee. He’s being evaluated tomorrow night so the question is will he screw Punk because he’s got nothing to lose or will he play it fair?

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler

Johnny Ace is referee. Actually scratch that as he says he’ll be outside referee and there will be a regular one in the ring. We get big match intros as we should. Punk gets a nice reaction. Before the bell, Ace comes in and throws Vickie out. My goodness they’re actually following continuity! Punk won a match a few weeks ago that ensured Vickie wouldn’t be out here if you remember that.

Ziggler goes for a quick Fameasser and Punk goes for a quick GTS which both miss. Ace is texting already. They start with a nice sequence of counters and avoiding moves. This is going to be a chess match. Sunset flip gets two for the champ and he tries the Vice but Ziggy gets to the ropes. Punk takes it to the mat quickly and we go outside. Punk gets in a few shots and goes up top back in but Ziggler knocks him off for two. The champ is holding his neck.

Neckbreaker puts Punk down and Ziggler drops about ten elbows, finishing with a jumping elbow for a one count. Off to a chinlock for a few moments. Punk fights up and they slug it out. Ziggler grabs a sleeper which Punk reverses into an Anaconda attempt. Back to the sleeper but it’s not all the way on. Ziggler rolls off and a dropkick gets two. He tries a running Fameasser but gets caught in a helicopter bomb for two.

Punk fires off strikes and a swinging neckbreaker to put Dolph down. There are the knee and bulldog and Punk has the fire in his eyes. GTS is countered into a catapult but Punk lands on the middle rope. Ziggler rolls through a cross body for two with tights. Punk gets a running boot for a delayed two. This has been FAR better than any other match tonight. Punk slams him to set up the elbow but stops because it’s near Ace. He goes up anyway and the elbow gets two. It also draws a Randy Savage chant and a smile from me.

Another GTS attempt is countered by Ziggler and Punk is shoved into the referee. Ace tries to wake him up and Punk gets the Vice. Ziggler taps but there’s no referee because Ace is trying to revive him. Punk lets it go and yells at Ace. Ziggler rolls him up but Punk reverses into a rollup of his own. It would get three but there’s still no referee. John rolls the referee back in and keeps checking on him.

Punk finally shoves Ace and yells at him. Ziggler tries to jump him but gets caught in the GTS. Ace gets knocked down by Dolph’s feet and thinks Punk intentionally hit him. There’s STILL no referee to count the pin, but he’s on his knees now. Ace won’t count so Punk says the next GTS is for him. Punk loads up another GTS on Ziggler but Dolph counters into a Fameasser in a SWEET counter but it only gets two.

Ziggler is back into it now and he pounds away at Punk like there’s no tomorrow. The regular referee is back up now. Here comes the Zig Zag but Punk catches it into a slingshot. GTS hits but Ace comes in and….counts the pin along with the regular referee so that Punk wins at 14:42.

Rating: B. Not a classic or anything but it was by far the best match of the night and a great breath of air to this horrible show. Punk and Ziggler are just great together and in the match, everything made perfect sense. Ace didn’t see who hit him and that it was an accident so he was justifiably mad. He spent a lot of time with the referee but there never was any actual cheating.

Ace hands the referee the belt so Punk can take it. He applauds Punk as well.

Ad for WWE on Youtube which will have 9 original shows apparently. It debuts Wednesday.

Rumble by the Numbers promo.

Royal Rumble

Miz is #1 and he has the AWESOME white balloons to go through. Elimination Chamber is in three weeks. My goodness. Alex Riley is second in a nice twist. Miz takes him down in the corner and Booker is talking about royal jelly. Riley throws him to the apron but Miz lands on the apron. Riley charges like an idiot and is out before #3 comes in. Third is R-Truth and I’m so glad they’re not calling this random anymore. It would just be laughable.

Truth puts him on the apron as well but Miz gets back in. The Finale is escapes but the Little Jimmy is avoided. Truth tries….something that I think was suppsed to be a forward suplex but turned into a powerslam. Miz is thrown to the apron and Cody is #4. Cody hits a quick Beautiful Disaster and then teams up with Miz to work on Truth. Cody takes awhile working on Truth and is thrown to the apron but he hangs on.

Miz takes Truth down with a neckbreaker and Cody gets back in. #5 is Justin Gabriel and he goes up top to take the heels out with a cross body. Flying shoulder takers Miz down and a Blue Thunder Bomb does the same to Cody. The clock seems to be going very quickly. Miz is put down again by a spinwheel kick but Cody gets in a shot to slow Gabriel down. The feuds pair off with Justin and Cody trading chops.

Primo is #6 and unfortunately there’s no Rosa. He actually cleans house with clotheslines and martial arts. He takes all four guys down and never gets hit at all. A NICE headscissors puts Justin down and Cody misses Beautiful Disaster to Truth. The spinning forearm takes Cody down but Miz throws Truth out. Truth pulls Miz out and hits a Little Jimmy on the floor, but Miz went under the ropes so he’s not eliminated.

In at #7 is MICK FOLEY! He, ahem, “runs” to the ring and takes Primo down quickly. Officially there are 5 people in at the moment but Miz is on the floor. Primo charges and gets backdropped out and is eliminated by Mick. Cody jumps Foley as Justin takes a breather. There’s a Bang Bang knee in the corner. Double Arm DDT takes Cody down and Justin helps with the elimination attempt.

Alberto Del…..and never mind it’s Ricardo at #8. In a hilarious bit, he comes out in a rusted out 80s car with a Hefty bag covering a busted out window. He’s in the scarf and tights also. This is GREAT. Justin and Foley are stunned. There’s a Ricardo chant. He runs around for awhile and actually puts Justin out as Foley stands there. Santino is #9 as we’re in the comedy portion of the Rumble. Cody is still down in the corner and Miz is on the mat.

Ricardo comes right at Santino but runs from the Cobra being teased. Santino beats up Ricardo for a bit, gives him a wedgie, and tosses him. Foley and Santino are the only ones left and I kid you not: it’s Socko vs. the Cobra. They circle each other with their hand puppets on and this is hilarious. Epico is in at #10. Cobra, Socko, bye bye. The Cobra and Sock collide and it’s hilarious still.

Miz gets back in to fight Foley as Cody tosses Santino. Socko to Miz but Cody comes from behind to toss him. Miz and Cody are the only ones in now but Kofi comes in at #11 to keep them from fighting. Kofi does the running dive through the ropes into a clothesline to take Cody down. He speeds things way up and hits a springboard double clothesline and a double Boom Drop. Miz is thrown to the apron but Cody makes the save.

A dropkick from Cody puts Kofi down and the clock is already ticking again. In at #12 is….JERRY LAWLER!!! That was a nice surprise and he ducks a right hand from Miz. Both heels go down from right hands and dropkicks. A slam puts Miz down and Lawler drops the strap and hits the middle rope punch, but Cody puts him out with little effort. Still though that was a cool surprise.

It’s Kofi, Cody, Miz and now Big Zeke Jackson with new tights at #13. King is back on commentary and at least he lasted longer than he did in 1997 I believe. Zeke pounds on everyone but doesn’t try to eliminate anyone until Jinder Mahal comes in to bore us #14. Cole tries to make us care by talking about the color of his head wrap which isn’t a turban apparently. He takes forever to get in so Zeke beats on everyone for awhile. The fans chant USA, so I guess they don’t like Zeke and Kofi and are supporting Cody and Miz?

We hit the halfway point as Great Khali is #15. Jinder is a little nervous. I forgot he existed so I guess the Hall of Pain was effective. Khali chops everyone and Jinder is easily tossed after trying to fight back. Jackson goes after Khali but takes a chop of his own. A clothesline puts Jackson out. It’s Miz, Rhodes, Kingston and Khali in at the moment and we’ve had 11 eliminations and 15 entrants.

Cody is dropped onto the apron by Kofi. Here’s #16 in the form of Hunico on a tricked out lowrider bike. Camacho is with him but leaves. A nice spinning springboard cross body takes Kofi down and things speed up. He hits his modified Angle Slam on Cody but is quickly chopped down. We’re about 24 minutes in and already at #17, which is BOOKER T! Sorry but you have to shout when any old person is in these things. Internet policy don’t you know.

Booker hammers on everyone but Khali stares him down. Booker goes at him and is chopped down quickly. The ring is at its fullest so far I believe with six guys in it. Khali chops Rhodes in the corner and Miz throws Kofi to the apron. He skins the cat but Miz kicks him down. Kofi lands in a handstand and WALKS BACKWARDS ON HIS HANDS TO GET TO THE STEPS! That was INCREDIBLE!!!

Dolph Ziggler is in at #18 and goes after the guy that has easily just trumped the wall climb by Morrison. Not much happens until Jim Duggan is #19, getting one of the best reactions of the night. There are seven or eight in there at the moment: Duggan, Khali, Hunico, Rhodes, Miz, Kingston, Booker and Ziggler. So it’s 8 and we’ve had 19 entrants and 11 eliminations. Duggan gets in some shots but Rhodes puts him out with a clothesline to the back.

Khali, Ziggler and Cody team up to put out Booker but Khali goes out instead. #20 is….Michael Cole. There’s your gimmick for the Rumble. And he has the wrestling gear on. How does the screening process for these entrants go? We keep the camera on him for far too long as we now have Cole, Miz, Kofi, Cody, Hunico and Ziggler in now. Cody tries to put Ziggler out as Cole dances around. If JR is in this thing I’ll need a stiff drink. #21 is…..Kharma! Wow she’s back early but they’ve been playing up the whole only two women ever thing.

She goes right after Cole and runs him over so hard the headgear comes off. Cole jumps over the top rope to the apron as Booker and Lawler jump up to eliminate him. Ziggler goes after Kharma who plants her with the Implant Buster. She throws Hunico WAY up and out. Ziggler dumps her but that was awesome. Ok so we now have Ziggler, Cody, Miz and Kofi in there. Good to see the young guys getting their chance.

#22 is Sheamus and the place goes nuts. He’s in red now. House is cleaned with everyone but Kofi getting hit. Powerslam to Ziggler and one for Miz as well. He goes after Kofi as well as Cole gives us stats on the announcers. Sheamus dumps Kofi to get us down to three in the ring at the moment. There are the ten forearms to Cody and ten for Miz as well. #23 is the Road Dogg to very little reaction.

He hammers on everyone in sight and hits the three punches and dance. There’s the Shake Rattling Kneedrop which has a name that I don’t remember. Pumphandle slam takes Miz down and the fans chant You Still Got It. Jey Uso is #24 but Jimmy is in street clothes so it’ll just be one. He superkicks Miz as Vickie screams. The Umaga running hip shot hits Roadie and Ziggler is draped on the ropes. It’s Miz, Sheamus, Jey Uso, Road Dogg, Ziggler and Cody at the moment. We’ve had 18 eliminated and 24 entrants so far.

#25 is Jack Swagger. He and Ziggler hook up and it’s Barrett at #26 with new music. Barrett dumps Road Dogg and gets in a fight with Sheamus. #27, the lucky number, is David Otunga. Well so much for it being lucky this year. He takes forever to get to the ring as we have I think 8 people in there right now. Otunga legitimately won a case in court earlier this week so at least he has something to fall back on.

The ring is pretty full here as we wait on Orton to clear them out. There’s him, Jericho and one other spot that I can’t think of to go. There are eight in at the moment but I’ll wait until #30 gets in to recap them. #28 is Orton and the place goes banana. Orton runs people over and hits a Thesz Press on Barrett. He cleans house but Rhodes jumps him. Orton puts him in Elevated DDT position but has to fight Ziggler off. We get a double DDT instead. Ok then.

Orton tosses Uso then RKOs Barrett to toss him out. #29 is Chris Jericho so who’s #30. This could be very interesting. Jericho goes after everyone and tosses Otunga. We have Swagger, Sheamus, Jericho, Ziggler, Orton, Rhodes and Miz. Here’s #30 and it’s……Big Show. Well that’s kind of a letdown but it’s a good place for a giant. Sheamus throws Swagger out as Show gets in.

The final group: Orton, Sheamus, Jericho, Miz, Cody, Ziggler and Big Show. He puts out Miz and Cody on his own to get us down to five. There goes Ziggler to get us down to the final four. There’s plenty of time left as it’s only 10:37 and the show has been going on a little over 45 minutes. Everyone takes a corner and they all go after Big Show. He throws them off with ease but an RKO puts him down. Orton tosses Show by himself and Jericho tosses Orton.

It’s Sheamus vs. Jericho and they circle each other before going at it. This is kind of a surprising final pairing even though they were some of the early favorites. Jericho is in long tights too. Booker thinks Sheamus winning the Rumble would do something for his career. You can’t buy analysis like this people. Missile dropkick puts Sheamus down. Irish Curse looks to set up the Celtic Cross but Jericho escapes and puts Sheamus on the apron. Jericho kicks him down but Sheamus hooks the rope with his leg. He hits the slingshot to get back in and we keep going.

Sheamus puts Jericho into the apron but the Brogue Kick misses. Jericho gets back in and hooks the Walls of Jericho which Lawler questions the use of but it wore Sheamus down I guess. Jericho sets for a clothesline but Sheamus backdrops him to the apron. Chris hangs on and they go to the corner. Jericho has still gone over the top remember. Sheamus is knocked off and crotched so they’re both on the apron after having gone over the top. And they’re both back in so we continue. This final part has been good so far.

Codebreaker takes Sheamus down and Jericho tries to choke Sheamus over the top. For some reason he slaps Sheamus which is just freaking stupid. Jericho tries to fight back but the Codebreaker is countered and Sheamus sits him on the ropes. Jericho hangs on but Sheamus Brogue Kicks him down and wins the Rumble at 54:48.

Rating: B+. Very good Rumble with a great variety of comedy and wrestling to make it work. It felt somewhat formula based at times but everything in WWE does anymore. It was fun though and it seems that they’re pushing someone new (kind of) for a change which is the best you can ask for in these things.

Overall Rating: B-. Well the final two matches saved it but the first hour of so of this was AWFUL. That being said, the whole point of the show is the Rumble and that was great so I can’t complain about the overall show all that much. A good Rumble can save a show, and it plus the Raw Title match did here. Good show, but only because they have a nearly hour long match to cover up the first hour being awful.

Results
Daniel Bryan b. Mark Henry and Big Show – Bryan escaped the cage
Beth Phoenix/Bella Twins/Natalya b. Kelly Kelly/Alicia Fox/Tamina/Eve Torres – Glam Slam to Kelly
John Cena vs. Kane went to a double countout
Brodus Clay b. Drew McIntyre – What The Funk
CM Punk b. Dolph Ziggler – GTS
Sheamus won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Chris Jericho

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Ring of Honor TV – January 15, 2020: They’ve Lost That Wrestling Feeling

IMG Credit: Ring of Honor

Ring of Honor
Date: January 15, 2020
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Caprice Coleman, Ian Riccaboni
Hosts: Ian Riccaboni, Quinn McKay

We’re back after last week’s less than inspired show. The biggest problem with last week was they didn’t make me all that interested in seeing what happened to a lot of these people. That being said, it’s not like there were a lot of people included last week. It didn’t feel like a fallout show and I don’t see that continuing this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We look at Jonathan Gresham vs. Alex Shelley in a teacher vs. student match with Shelley winning. Tonight, it’s the rematch.

Quinn and Ian explain that Shelley beat Gresham in a teacher vs. student match and tonight it’s the rematch.

We get clips of Flip Gordon making Rey Horus tap out at Final Battle Fallout.

Brian Johnson still doesn’t want to study under PJ Black.

Crowbar vs. Eli Isom

Yes the WCW Crowbar and he has a woman and a large man with him. He doesn’t like the new generation so Isom says he’ll show what the new generation can do. Crowbar jumps him in the corner to start but gets suplexed out. Some shoulders give Crowbar one but Isom is right back up with a dropkick. The big man blocks the suicide dive though and the woman’s distraction lets Crowbar hit a running knee to the back. Crowbar hits a legdrop between the legs and we take a break.

Back with Crowbar sending him into the barricade and hitting a Vader Bomb off said barricade. They head inside again with Isom firing off some forearms and hitting a King Corbin Deep Six for the double knockdown. A bicycle kick knocks Crowbar off the apron and into the arms of the large man. That means a big suicide dive to take them both down as the fans are behind Isom again. Back in and Crowbar catches him on top with a super hurricanrana but walks into a hard clothesline. Isom brainbusters him for the pin at 9:34.

Rating: C-. The match was fine, but Crowbar??? Of all the people they could bring in for something like this, they picked Crowbar and let him have two people out there with him? It isn’t about the content, but rather the idea of having Crowbar around which makes ROH look low rent. Crowbar is the kind of guy who would be a midcard attraction on a low level indy show, not a company that is supposed to be one of the biggest in the country.

We look at Bully Ray chokeslamming Maria Manic through a table so we can get some ECW chants.

Ray talks about not liking Maria put Angelina Love through a table in his arena.

Cheeseburger/Ryan Nova vs. Soldiers of Savagery

Isom is still at ringside after the first match. It’s a brawl to start with Nova hitting a fast suicide dive on Khan. Moses gets kicked in the head but Khan pulls him down from the apron for a Rock Bottom. We settle down to Cheeseburger getting beaten up with forearms to the back and the chest, setting up the bearhug. Cheeseburger jawbreaks his way to freedom and it’s a diving tag to Nova so house can be cleaned. Nova kicks away and Cheeseburger gets in on it as well, only to have Moses hit a double clothesline to cut them down. A Snapshot finishes Nova at 5:06.

Rating: C. The Soldiers are a good enough team and ROH could use some monsters like them. That being said, they have barely been featured on TV since their debut and they don’t have anything resembling a story. The tag division could use a boost, but they’re not getting anywhere against heel champions at the moment. I’ll give them this though: they’ve made Cheeseburger watchable with the Squad stuff so well done.

We run down the Honor Reigns Supreme card.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Alex Shelley

Jay Lethal is here with Gresham. They fight over arm control to start and that’s an early standoff. Gresham spins him down and works on the leg on the mat but Shelley spins out for another standoff. Back up and Gresham misses a moonsault press as we take a break. We come back with Shelley Downward Spiraling him into the buckle to take over.

They run the ropes until Shelley’s leapfrog is pulled down by the leg with Shelley dropping a knee on said leg. A few rolls send us into a Figure Four on Shelley but he channels his inner Dunne and bends the fingers apart for the escape. Gresham takes him down by the knee again and we take a second break.

Back again with Gresham hitting a shinbreaker, only to have Shelley snap off an enziguri with the good leg. Shelley pulls himself up but loses a chop off, mainly thanks to another kick to the ribs. The same rollup that Shelley used to win the first match gets two and a superkick rocks Gresham again. They trade headlock takeovers into headscissors (kind of late in the match for that sequence) until Gresham stacks him up for the clean pin at 11:35.

Rating: C+. The technical stuff was good here but they didn’t do that well into going into the history between these two. It was treated like some big showdown match but instead it was just a nice, back and forth technical exchange. Gresham working the knee was fine, but there was very little to suggest that he was some new big time heel, especially one who had just won a title by cheating.

Post match Shelley shakes hands with the champs before leaving in peace to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Better show overall this week but you would still have no idea that they are a month removed from their biggest show of 2019. Maybe that’s due to the change in bookers with Marty Scurll taking over and that’s one thing, but egads it’s rather annoying waiting around on something interesting to happen. Or at least for them to air the interesting thing that happened. Not a bad show this week, but another one you don’t need to see.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Best Of 2010s: Non-Wrestler Of The Decade

IMG Credit: WWE

Ok this one isn’t going to be the biggest surprise. There isn’t much of a way around it but that’s the way these things go sometimes. Even though there are so many names in wrestling, there are some of them who are just better at some aspects than others. That isn’t always inside the ring, which is what we’re looking at today.

Honorable Mention

Vickie Guerrero: I know she wasn’t around long in the decade and could be annoying, but for someone who was hired as little more than a favor to her deceased husband, Vickie ran with her chance and deserves a mention.

Stephanie McMahon

I don’t like her, you probably don’t like her, she can be one of the most annoying people in all of wrestling, but she can also be REALLY good at what she does. Stephanie comes off as one of the most evil people in WWE and while a lot of people aren’t fans of hers (you might say that is true of me, at least a little bit), she knows exactly how to play her role and get the most out of it.

Stephanie is perfect in her role as the stuck up, untouchable owner of the company and can give one of the most condescending promos in wrestling today. She’s awesome at what she does and it makes the times where she gets what’s coming to her all that much better. Much like a lot of other fans, I want to see someone finally get one up on her. That’s good storytelling and while it isn’t exactly executed right, she can do it very, very well.

Dario Cueto

Roddy Piper had a great line that summed up the problem of being a wrestler breaking into mainstream entertainment: “When I was wrestling they said I was acting but when I was acting, they said I was just a wrestler.” That’s a rather insightful line and it’s why Lucha Underground made a brilliant move when they signed a regular actor to play the company’s boss.

Lucha Underground became a cult hit and Cueto was one of the biggest reasons why. He nailed every aspect of what he did at a level that was only beaten (maybe) by Vince McMahon himself and that is some elite company. There was such great joy in his eyes as he would do something horrible to set up his latest evil idea and his catchphrases worked very well. I loved watching this guy because he was so good at it, though he ruins the same role for almost anyone else because no one else can do it like him.

William Regal

This was the only person I considered for the top spot other than the winner. Regal is an outstanding example of someone who knows how to get things done in a hurry. Maybe it is just due to how well things are written in NXT, but seeing how fast he gets things done is a treat to watch. Regal has all of the respect in the world and it has paid off in spades here.

What makes Regal work is you know he is the law in NXT. He has been in charge for years now and unless he gets a promotion, there is no reason to have him leave. Regal is like the father who can bring good news, but when you push him too far, there is no stopping him no matter who you are. The best example of this you’ll find was at the United Kingdom Title Tournament in 2017 when Pete Dunne tried to make a name for himself by jumping the other competitors in between matches. Regal stormed out and stared Dunne down, sending Dunne running away. That’s power, and Regal has it in spade.

But yeah, who are we kidding?

Paul Heyman

This very well may be the biggest layup of both sets of awards. Heyman is not perfect by any means and has some failures to his name, but when he is on his game, there is no one better at what they do. His work with CM Punk was outstanding and another good example of why wrestlers wanted to be labeled as a Paul Heyman Guy. It’s quite the honor and Heyman has earned the accolade.

Oh yeah and then there’s the whole “he works with Brock Lesnar” deal. I don’t remember the last pairing that was better because Heyman never stops talking but who is going to go after him when he’s hiding behind Brock Lesnar? These promos are always well done and worthy of at least some praise, to the point where even though they are getting repetitive, they are still excellent. Heyman belongs at the top of this list and it was a pretty easy pick.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6