Wrestlemania VIII
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

This was one of the names mentioned for a possible redo so I’ll throw it in as a bonus. On his podcast, Bruce Prichard mentioned this as one of the worst Wrestlemanias ever and I’m really not sure why. The show features a double main event with Ric Flair defending the WWF World Title against Randy Savage and Hulk Hogan’s possible retirement match against Sid Justice. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon gives us the big over the top introduction as only he can do. It only talks about the double main event but really, nothing else is worth talking about.

Gorilla and Bobby (with a VERY visible section of empty seats between their heads, which will be a recurring problem tonight) intro the show with Heenan looking for the pictures. Those would be promised “centerfolds” of Elizabeth, which Ric Flair has promised. More on this later.

Reba McIntyre singes the Star Spangled Banner. It’s odd to hear anything but America the Beautiful.

Tito Santana vs. Shawn Michaels

Tito is a bullfighter (it didn’t work then either) and Heenan says he’s McIntyre’s sister. Heenan: “That’s arriba McIntyre!” Shawn has Sherri with him and we get a cool shot from behind with Shawn looking up at the huge stadium. This is his first singles Wrestlemania so it’s quite the big moment for his career. Heenan thinks Shawn is a future Intercontinental Champion. He’s a few months early but he certainly can call things.

We get a long stretch of Sherri leaving and some trash talk before we actually do anything because stalling is a thing on stadium shows too. They start fast (once they start that is) with Tito getting two off a crossbody and headlocking him to the mat. Shawn gets sent outside in a heap and that means it’s time for the over the top selling. We hit the headlock again and MY GOODNESS there are some half empty sections very visible in the upper deck. If that happened today, the production staff would all be fired.

Tito pops him in the jaw and Sherri is panicking at the thought of Shawn’s face being damaged. It’s back to the headlock and Shawn can’t even throw him off with a lift into the air. Heenan swears that he’s won a match with a headlock and that someone even gave up during instructions.

Back up and Shawn finally throws him over the top for a huge crash to take over. A backbreaker keeps Tito in trouble as Sherri is taking her glove off for some reason. We hit the chinlock and even more of those empty sections are shown. There’s almost no angle you can show here that doesn’t display them and it’s really distracting. Tito fights up but charges into the superkick (not yet a finisher) and Heenan declares no more tacos tonight.

The Teardrop Suplex is broken up and Tito scores with his flying forearm (Heenan: “That’s the Flying Jalapeno!”) to send Shawn outside. Back in and Tito slugs away, allowing Shawn to do the overblown Wrestlemania selling for the first time. El Paso Del Muerte (jumping forearm to the back) sends Shawn to the floor and Tito tries a suplex, only to have Shawn grab the rope and fall on top for the pin at 10:38.

Rating: B-. Good opener here as Tito is one of those guys who is always good for a solid performance. Shawn’s star was clearly on the rise here (give someone Sherri if you need them to get a rocket attached to their back) and a win in a competitive match was a good start. Solid match here and that’s all it needed to be.

Gene Okerlund is on the platform and brings out the Legion of Doom for an interview, including manager Paul Ellering. Paul talks about the need to put the team together in the first place and now revenge has brought them back together. He’s not here to get rich but to get even. Animal talks about facing and defeating adversity and now it’s time to get revenge on everyone, including Jimmy Hart and Money Inc.

Hawk says they’re a runaway train and now, look who’s driving the train. Paul wraps it up by saying they’re going to earn their money the old fashioned way: beating people for it. They want the titles back and don’t care who they have to beat to get them back. Ellering was good for the team in the NWA but I have no idea why he was needed here. Or why he’s somehow back in WWE twenty six years later.

Jake Roberts isn’t bringing a snake back to the ring but he will recap his feud with Undertaker. He’s gone full evil to go after Ultimate Warrior but since Warrior left the company, Undertaker turned face on Jake, setting up the match. Jake trapped Undertaker’s hand in the casket on the Funeral Parlor and laid Bearer out with a DDT, followed by a chair shot to Undertaker. Evil Jake was awesome but this was a bit of a different kind of animal.

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

I love that pulling himself up from the corner thing that Jake does. Diamond Dallas Page borrowed it from him and it’s not all that surprising. Jake slugs away to start and reality sets in very quickly. A running right hand puts Undertaker on the floor but Jake gets pulled outside as well. The beating is on and the fans are WAY into a fired up Undertaker.

Back in and Jake’s right hands still don’t have much effect so Bobby starts making Munsters references. Better than the Addams Family at least. Undertaker starts choking but Jake grabs a quick DDT and you can feel the fans react. Then Undertaker sits up and it’s very clear that this is something different. Another DDT drops Undertaker again but this time Jake goes after Bearer….as Undertaker gets up again. That means a Tombstone on the floor and Jake is DEAD for the pin at 6:41.

Rating: D. This was around the time where the Undertaker would start to be the kind of attraction that the company wanted him to be. It’s clear that there’s something very different about him and beating a big name like Roberts was a great way to push him towards that goal. I mean, beating Hogan less than six months ago did it even more so but still, awesome booking here. This was Jake’s last match with the company until 1996 as he was turned down for Pat Patterson’s job and left as a result.

Roddy Piper and Bret Hart are in the back with Roddy talking about growing up together when Bret was a bit dumb. Apparently Mrs. Hart would make them sandwiches but Bret finally cuts him off. They’re supposed to have a nice contest for the Intercontinental Title but Bret wants to be serious. That’s fine with Roddy and the match is on. Bret lost the title due to wrestling with a high fever and Piper won it almost immediately. This is Bret’s big rematch and one of the most intriguing matches on the show.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Piper is defending. The first minute is spent with Piper taking off his kilt and some instructions from the referee. Never let it be said that Wrestlemania doesn’t know how to waste time. Piper armdrags him down to start as Monsoon actually analyzes the match, which isn’t something you get from most other announcers. Heenan’s idea: waffle the other guy with a tire iron.

Piper tries some amateur wrestling and is quickly sent outside in a huff. Back in and Piper spits at Bret and Heenan wants an apology right now. Bret wins a battle of the wristlocks and Piper can’t chop his way to freedom. Monsoon says thirty countries are watching the show live, lists off three of them, and then stops for a good fifteen seconds of silence. A running dropkick drops Piper but Bret comes up holding his shoulder. Heenan sees right through it (Bobby: “WHAT A GREAT MOVE!”) and Roddy is REALLY not happy.

Bret comes back with a running crossbody and they fall out to the floor at the same time. Piper is up first and holds the ropes for Bret but naturally gets in a cheap shot to take over. Well you know he’s the most natural heel ever so it’s not exactly a surprise. A bulldog gives Piper two and Bret is busted open (which he lied about, claiming that it was a hardway cut to save his job) somewhere in there.

Bret is fine enough to get two off a sunset flip and Heenan is begging for some more violence. A slugout goes to Piper so Bret hits a running forearm to knock him outside. Back in and a double clothesline puts them both down with Piper’s head landing on Bret. Heenan wants a count but Monsoon accurately says all four shoulders are down so there can’t be a pin. So much for the Brain.

Bret is up first with the Five Moves of Doom but Piper blocks the Sharpshooter. The middle rope elbow hits a raised boot and Piper has an opening. The referee gets bumped though and Bret is sent face first into the steps. Piper grabs the bell but can’t bring himself to do it (Heenan: “GIVE IT TO ME! I’LL HIT HIM!”), instead grabbing a sleeper. Bret climbs the corner and flips backwards onto Piper for the pin and the title at 13:52.

Rating: A-. This is the match that you point at when you need to prove that Piper can put on a good match when he’s given the chance. Bret winning the title back here was all that this should have been and the classic made it an even better moment. That ending would be used several times over the years and is rather famous in its own right, which is rather fitting when it comes from a classic wrestler like Bret. Great match here and another example of how talented both of them really are.

They shake hands to make it clear that Piper is still on the good side.

Heenan sends us to Atlanta, Georgia and the home of future WBF Bodystars Champion Lex Luger. Lex is his usual smug self and praises Bobby while calling Gorilla fat. Luger takes off his shirt to reveal a muscle shirt and Heenan is WAY too excited. He has some milk to wrap this up with Monsoon not exactly being impressed. Monsoon: “You found someone even more conceited than you are!”

The Mountie, the Nasty Boys and Repo Man are excited for the eight man tag.

Sgt. Slaughter, Jim Duggan, Virgil and Big Boss Man are excited for the eight man tag. Remember that Slaughter was main eventing the show last year.

Comedian Ray Combs is guest ring announcer for said eight man tag and of course he has some jokes. Since we can’t survey who will be good or evil (yeah you can), he’s asked 100 people (the gimmick of his Family Feud game show) about some of the people in the match. The Mountie is dumb like the Three Stooges, Repo Man is ugly and looks like a girl and the Nasty Boys are only successful because they’re lucky. With that he’s chased off and we’re ready to go.

The Mountie/Nasty Boys/Repo Man vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan/Big Boss Man/Virgil

The good guys clean house with elbows and clotheslines as Heenan plugs some WWF names being on Family Feud. So there’s your cross promotion. Hang on though: SHAWN MICHAELS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING! Monsoon: “WHO CARES?” Well Shawn might. Anyway we settle down to Sags vs. Duggan with Jim firing off some clotheslines. I mean, as much fire as Duggan is going to have.

Slaughter comes in for some clotheslines of his own to Knobbs before dropping to his knees for an elbow to the ribs. What an odd visual. It’s off to Boss Man for a wind up uppercut but he misses a splash on Repo Man. Repo jumps onto Boss Man’s back, shouts ONE MORE TIME, and jumps right into a low blow.

Virgil, with a broken nose, comes in and gets taken down without much effort. Even Heenan is running out of ways to make fun of the people in this match because Virgil is such a joke in the first place. Sags hits a pumphandle slam but Boss Man comes in with a spinebuster as everything breaks down. Some heel miscommunication sees Sags hit Knobbs to give Virgil the pin at 6:28.

Rating: D. Wrestlemania was different back then, which might be the biggest understatement of the wrestling year. This was a house show match to pop the crowd but here it served as a way to let them cool down a bit after the title change. At least it served a purpose, but it feels so out of place on here.

Flair and his executive consultant Mr. Perfect look at the blown up picture of Liz (we can’t see it of course) with Flair swearing it’s real. Ric talks about the bright lights and the big city where Savage will try to reclaim the biggest trophy of them all. After Savage takes the beating of his life, Savage can look up and see the pictures just like everyone else. Then Liz has one more shot at Space Mountain. Perfect: “Can I come along with you this time champ?”

Savage won’t grant interviews.

Since the company doesn’t feel the need to explain the story, the idea here is Flair claimed to have been with Liz before she met Savage. As Savage is completely crazy most days and even worse when it comes to her, this sent him into the rage of all rages and set up the angle after the match was made, which is always odd. Anyway, Flair has promised to show some rather private pictures of Liz, which have only been referenced about a hundred times in the first hour and ten minutes of the show.

WWF World Title: Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair

Flair is defending and wearing red, meaning he’s likely losing (Look it up. He almost never wins a big match when he’s wearing red.). Heenan instantly says that to be fair to Flair, you have to say that’s a great robe, giving Monsoon one of his best ever WILL YOU STOP’s. Savage jumps Flair in the aisle until Perfect drags him off the champ. Heenan sums things up very well: Savage wants to hurt Flair rather than win the title so things should be going fine for Flair (and Heenan, who was in full on Flair fanboy mode here).

Flair tries an atomic drop and gets his head taken off with a clothesline. A backdrop sends Savage to the floor with one of his trademark great bumps. Savage is already favoring his back so Flair stomps away as Heenan goes into one of the best, longest rants I’ve ever heard him give on Flair not losing. Flair gets two off a suplex (Heenan: “An eighty year old woman could have counted faster than Hebner!”) and the belly to back version is good for the same. A chop takes Savage right back down and Flair drops him back first onto the apron.

Another suplex gets another two as they’ve moved to a rather slow pace. Savage manages to get in a neckbreaker and Heenan needs a drink. The required slam off the top keeps Flair in trouble and Heenan is begging for Flair to do something. I know I’m talking about Heenan a lot in this match but he’s absolutely amazing here. The Flair Flip sends Ric to the top but he dives into a clothesline for two and Heenan….well I think you can figure this one out from here.

Savage sends him outside and hits an ax handle to drive Flair into the barricade. With Flair falling down, we get one of the most obvious blade jobs you’ll ever see (nearly getting him fired in the process). Back in and Savage hammers away with another ax handle getting two. The big elbow connects but Perfect pulls Savage out at two. Thank goodness that wasn’t a DQ or they might have burned the dome down.

Perfect gets dragged in and the referee gets bumped for a few seconds, allowing Perfect to throw Flair an object. That’s only good for two as well so Perfect nails Savage in the leg with a chair. Cue Liz with a host of suits (including Shane McMahon in one of his first on-screen appearances) trying to stop her. Flair goes into his usual leg work routine and the Figure Four goes on. Heenan: “SHOW ME THE PICTURES!”

Perfect grabs the hand so the referee kicks it away, allowing Savage to turn it over and break the hold. A small package gives Savage two (and a GREAT false near fall with the crowd gasping) but Flair goes back to the knee. Savage blocks a right hand though and a rollup (with trunks) gives Randy the title back at 17:58.

Rating: A. I got WAY into this match watching it back and was having a great time with everything. The crowd completely bought into Savage’s quest for revenge with the title just being a bonus prize. All the cheating was great stuff with Savage overcoming all odds, partially due to the inspiration from Liz. The match was even different from the usual stuff with Savage having long stretches of control, which you almost never see in a match like this. Really great stuff here and an underrated classic. If nothing else just listen to Heenan’s commentary.

Post match Heenan bails from the booth and Flair tries to kiss Liz. That earns him a bunch of slaps to the face as everything goes crazy. Perfect takes Savage down and Flair goes after the knee as all the suits are powerless to stop anything. Savage fights up and cleans house before finally being announced as the new champion.

Perfect claims a handful of trunks (accurate) and says that’s not how a macho man would act. Heenan comes in and says there’s nothing to worry about because it’s all on tape. Flair says tonight, a man is going to walk around Indianapolis claiming to be the real World’s Champion and to have the love of Liz. Perfect talks about Savage taking a shortcut, which Flair has NEVER done. Perfect: “Just like his old lady! A cheater!” Ric promises to get the title back and kiss Liz whenever he sees her.

Savage can barely walk and says this isn’t done. Today was just a piece of what Flair has coming to him because he hasn’t been beaten up properly. Flair has somehow made him even madder than he was so it doesn’t matter where it is, but Ric is getting the beating he deserves. Liz isn’t allowed to say if she’s been vindicated as Savage gives her the belt, saying it’s hers. Savage if Flairs though and this is just a piece. GREAT stuff here from Savage who can play the crazed man like few others (and I use the term “play” loosely).

We recap Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan. Hulk had been named #1 contender and Sid wasn’t happy. Therefore he turned on Hogan during a tag match and went on a major rampage, including destroying the Barber Shop set. That was enough to change Wrestlemania as Hogan wanted to fight Sid instead. Hogan has also teased that this might be his last match, which translates to “steroids are becoming a big issue and Hogan isn’t the cleanest looking guy in the world”.

Intermission keeps going with some members of Tatanka’s tribe dancing in the ring.

Rick Martel has some reservations about Tatanka because he’s still outside scalping tickets.

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

Yes this is on Wrestlemania as it’s just a different time. Martel knees him in the ribs to start as Heenan issues a statement on it being a matter of time until they get the title back. He lists off all of his jobs in the Flair organization with Monsoon only responding with “YOU’RE A LIAR!” Heenan offers to put em up and Monsoon laughs it off.

Tatanka elbows his way out of trouble and sends Martel shoulder first into the post. A choke takedown drops Tatanka as we’re still waiting on the announcers to acknowledge the match going on. Martel sends him hard to the floor as Monsoon says “Ric Flair” is giving a wrestling lesson right now. Rick heads up but gets crotched, setting up the comeback and a crossbody to pin Martel at 4:31.

Rating: D. Just a filler match here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Today it would be a quick comedy match or something so it’s hard to argue with something being in this spot on the card. Martel feels out of place here, though there’s nothing wrong with having a solid hand like him on the roster. You’re going to get least a watchable match out of him and this did its job, albeit not in the most entertaining way.

Tag Team Champions Money Inc. (Ted DiBiase and IRS with new manager Jimmy Hart) is ready to take care of the Natural Disasters. Hart jumped from the Disasters to Money Inc. and has told them all of the Disasters’ secrets. It’s not a bad idea and it’s not like it’s hard to boo Money Inc.

The Disasters (Earthquake and Typhoon) are ready for revenge and the titles.

Tag Team Titles: Money Inc. vs. Natural Disasters

Money Inc. is defending. IRS starts with Earthquake but bails in very short order as Heenan complains about all the noise here. Some hard shoves send DiBiase into the corner before the champs are rocked with some big clotheslines. After a meeting with Jimmy, it’s IRS getting his arm hammered by Earthquake.

Typhoon comes in for a hiptoss and it’s his turn to get tossed into the corner. Completely one sided so far as Gorilla keeps mocking Heenan over Flair’s loss. Typhoon finally misses a splash in the corner and it’s off to DiBiase. We get an awkward looking sequence where DiBiase doesn’t seem ready to low bridge Typhoon to the floor. No worries though as they do it again a few seconds later (erg) and this time Typhoon goes over.

A double clothesline (somehow to the back of the head as Typhoon can’t even run the ropes properly) sets up a front facelock as this is dying before my eyes. Back up and Typhoon gets in a clothesline for his own for the ice cold tag to Earthquake. Everything breaks down and DiBiase is clotheslined to the floor. Earthquake loads up the Earthquake but IRS is pulled to the floor and it’s an intentional countout to retain the titles at 8:37.

Rating: F. WOW this was terrible and the fans clearly didn’t care. Can you blame them though? Not only was it boring but on top of that it was full of botches and had a house shoe level finish. Just horrible stuff here and in the running for worst Wrestlemania match ever. That’s some rather elite company and I have no idea why they thought this was a good idea.

Brutus Beefcake is here to support Hulk Hogan because Hulkamania will live forever.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Oh come on GET TO THE MAIN EVENT ALREADY! Skinner jumps him from behind to start and hits a quick shoulder breaker. The reverse DDT gets two on Owen but he skins the cat and grabs an O’Connor Roll to pin Skinner at 1:08. Absolute filler.

Sid cuts off Gene Okerlund, calling him a short, bald headed little oaf. He’s going to destroy Hulkamania once and for all. We go to a sitdown interview with Hogan where he says he’s just not sure if this is his final match or not. Vince, conducting the interview, shakes his hand and thanks him for everything. Sid promises to destroy every Hulkamaniac because he rules the world.

Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan

Sid has Harvey Whippleman in his corner. Hogan gets the big entrance and the fans are as into it as they’ve been in a good while but Sid jumps him from behind. In one of the most underrated Hogan sequences ever, he does a mini Hulk Up, punches Sid to the floor, and clotheslines him off the apron to send Sid outside. You can feel the power of Hulkamania and my goodness it works so freaking well all over again.

We settle down to Sid choking and hammering in the corner but Hulk is right back with more right hands. The fans are ALL OVER this and Sid bails to the floor for a minute. Back in and we hit the test of strength with Hogan going down. As the fans all reconsider their place in life, Hogan fights up but gets knocked into the corner. Hogan is in trouble again and gets sent to the floor for some shots to the back from Harvey’s medical bag.

Sid grabs a nerve hold and it looks like Hogan is taking a nap. Sid’s powerbomb sets up Hogan’s fish out of water selling and it’s time for the Hulk Up. Heenan: “THEY’RE BOTH NUTS!” The big boot and a slam (not exactly impressive on Sid) set up the legdrop….for two, as the scheduled run-in was mistimed (on purpose, as the company decided to make Hogan look bad in case it was his last match). Instead Harvey comes in for the DQ at 12:37.

Rating: D-. I know the wrestling is pretty terrible but my goodness some of those Hogan comebacks felt like the old days. The fans helped this one a lot and the opening was just too much to call this a failure. It felt like a house show match and that’s completely unacceptable for a Wrestlemania main event, but at least it had some great moments.

Post match Papa Shango (the scheduled run-in) comes out for the double beatdown but the Ultimate Warrior makes his return after about eight months away for the save. A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is all over the place as it goes from very good to horrible all night long. The ending with Warrior returning is more than enough of a combination with the two great matches to make the show work though and really, some of the bad matches are short enough that they don’t mean much. It doesn’t mean much in the long term as this was a VERY weak time for the company, but better times were coming in the forms of Bret and Shawn. For one last hurrah for the old guard though, it worked as a fun show, albeit one that needed a very powerful fast forward button.

Ratings Comparison

Shawn Michaels vs. El Matador

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: B-

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

2018 Redo: A-

Mountie/Nasty Boys/Repo Man vs. Jim Duggan/Virgil/Sgt. Slaughter/Big Boss Man

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D

Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2018 Redo: A

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: D

Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D-

2018 Redo: F

Skinner vs. Owen Hart

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2018 Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2018 Redo: B-

Nothing really out of the norm there and I’ve liked the show every time.

Here’s the original review:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/15/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-8-hogan-who-needs-the-bald-man/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/17/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-viii-show-me-the-pictures/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania VIII
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

In addition to the new names, another major change here is the length. This show runs about fifty minutes shorter than the last three years and has nine matches compared to 12-14 at recent Wrestlemanias. It should take away a lot of the filler and time wasting, which have been among the biggest problems in most of the shows. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on the double main event and is much brighter and colorful than videos of years past.

Heenan is looking for the centerfolds of Elizabeth that Flair (who Heenan was advising at this point) had promised. Monsoon: “DON’T START!”

Reba McEntire singe America the Beautiful.

El Matador vs. Shawn Michaels

Matador is Tito Santana as a bullfighter, and he’s introduced as El Matador Tito Santana. Shawn broke up the Rockers at the end of 1991 and gone solo (while taking Sherri with him), turning into the Heartbreak Kid. That means we get Sexy Boy, as sung by Sherri, for the first time here. Gorilla and Heenan argue over Sherri’s looks as she spends the first minute taking off Shawn’s jacket. A quick high cross body gets two for Tito and he slaps on a headlock as Gorilla plugs a hotline.

Shawn bails from the threat of a right hand so Tito clotheslines him to the floor. Fan: “YOU GOT WHAT YOU DESERVED SHAWN!” Back in and a headlock slows things down as we get into the technical sequence. Santana gets a few near falls off the headlock and the crowd is already losing interest. A small package for two gets them back into it a bit and we’re right back to the headlock.

Shawn finally shoves him off and gets in a right hand to take over. We hit a chinlock for a bit until Tito elbows his way out, only to walk into a superkick (not yet a finisher). Shawn’s real finisher (a teardrop suplex, something like an Angle Slam) is broken up and Tito hits the flying forearm, followed by an atomic drop so Shawn can do his nutty bumping. Tito’s Paso Del Muerte (a forearm to the back of the head. Heenan: “Extra hot pace picante???”) sends Shawn to the floor so Santana tries to suplex him back in. Shawn grabs the top rope though and for some reason Santana falls over, giving Shawn the pin at 10:38.

Rating: C. This took its time and was starting to pick up near the end but they ran out of time. It could have been something special if you add another three minutes or so to the end and cut off about a minute of the headlocks. Still a good enough match but it spent too much time building and not enough time on the execution.

Gene brings out the Legion of Doom with their old manager Paul Ellering, a kind of maniacal genius. Ellering talks about how he’s back to bring the team back to their excellence. Animal promises revenge on Jimmy Hart for cheating them out of the Tag Team Titles and to get the belts back. Hawk says the team has been a runaway train with no one driving, but look who’s driving now.

Ellering wants to know if going up worth the coming down for the other teams. They earn everything they have the old fashioned way: they beat people up for it. They’re coming for the titles and don’t care who it is. This was just a lengthy way to say “we’re back and Ellering is here.” He hadn’t been in the WWF before so this is new to most fans. The team would be gone by the fall when Hawk went insane in England.

Jake Roberts talks about laying a trap for Undertaker at the Funeral Parlor (interview segment) where he trapped Undertaker’s hand in a coffin and beat the heck out of him with a chair. The key here is Jake hyping up the DDT as the one thing that can keep Undertaker down. Undertaker turned face by preventing Jake from hitting Elizabeth with a chair after Jake’s match with Randy Savage and this is about revenge for both guys.

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

Right hands have little effect, including a running right hand to put Undertaker over the top but he lands on his feet. Back in and more right hands actually stagger Undertaker as Heenan thinks he has two brilliant minds. Undertaker is tired of getting punched in the face so he grabs Jake by the throat. A big jumping clothesline wakes the crowd up a bit but Jake slips out of the tombstone and plants him with the DDT.

Jake gets up….and so does Undertaker. Heenan: “Oh my God he’s not human.” The short arm clothesline sets up an even better DDT but Jake goes after Bearer instead, allowing Undertaker to sit up again. A tombstone on the floor (with Jake’s head a good six inches from actually connecting) is enough for the academic pin at 6:41.

Rating: D+. They didn’t have a great match but it told the right story of Undertaker being unstoppable. No one kicked out of the DDT and the idea of someone getting up from two of them, especially after Jake promising that it would be enough to take him out, makes Undertaker look like an unstoppable monster and that’s the right idea. Jake was gone to WCW after this.

Roddy Piper, the Intercontinental Champion, jokingly talks about growing up with Bret Hart but Bret doesn’t want to have fun today. All he wants is the Intercontinental Title back but Piper doesn’t like his tone.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Hart lost the title to the Mountie in January when he was sick so Piper took the rematch at the Royal Rumble and won, setting up Bret’s rematch here. No contact for the first minute. They keep up the slow start with Piper armdragging him down. The champ rides him on the mat until Bret rolls him out to the floor. Piper is ticked off at being shown up so he slaps Bret in the face to make things serious.

Heenan and Monsoon start agreeing about strategy and their mutual panicking is funny stuff. A running dropkick puts Piper down but Bret hurts his shoulder on the landing. Heenan sees through the goldbricking and is thrilled when a healthy Bret small packages Piper for two.

A cross body puts both guys on the floor in a crash and Bret is busted open, which is a very rare thing to see in this era. It was so rare that he had to lie about being busted open hard way to avoid being fired. Back inside it’s Piper getting in a sucker punch to do a mid match heel turn. A bulldog gets two for Piper and Bret’s sunset flip gets the same. You can hear the fans getting into this more and more by the second. Piper hammers away until Bret forearms him to the floor.

Back in and a double clothesline puts both guys down and Heenan has no idea why there’s no count since Piper’s head is on Bret’s stomach. Good point actually. Roddy gets pulled off the top and it’s time for the Five Moves of Doom. The middle rope elbow lands right on Piper’s raised boot (that looked great and it was clear what Bret was going for instead of intentionally diving into the boot) but the referee gets bumped.

Piper sends him into the steps and grabs the ring bell. The fans don’t want to see Piper go full on evil though and Piper has second thoughts. Heenan: “GIVE IT TO ME! I’LL HIT HIM!” Piper doesn’t give in to the demons though and puts on a sleeper, only to have Bret climb the ropes and flip backwards onto him for the pin and the title at 13:50.

Rating: A-. This is a great match and pretty easily Piper’s best in the company, possibly even in his career. It’s also Piper’s first clean loss in the company as he was very protective about his statue. The match itself was a classic too with both guys matching each other step by step. It was a great idea to have Piper tease going full on heel but stopping himself, which would actually be brought back at a later Wrestlemania. This still holds up incredibly well and it’s an awesome match with both guys coming off looking great.

Post match Piper hands the title to Bret and remains on the good side.

Heenan has a major surprise by introducing the future World Bodybuilding Federation (yes that was a real thing) Champion: Lex Luger. Lex calls Gorilla fat, takes off his shirt to show off his muscles, and drinks some milk.

The Mountie, the Nasty Boys and the Repo Man (formerly Smash) are ready for their eight man tag.

Sgt. Slaughter, Big Boss Man, Jim Duggan and Virgil (with a broken nose) are ready too. These are your basic old school hype promos and work fine.

Sgt. Slaughter/Big Boss Man/Jim Duggan/Virgil vs. The Mountie/Repo Man/Nasty Boys

Neither team gets an entrance but we do have time for some jokes by guest ring announcer Ray Combs, the host of Family Feud. Combs has taken a survey of 100 people here today (the gimmick of Family Feud) and gotten some opinions of the villains. Apparently Mountie is dumb and does the work of three men: Larry, Curly and Moe. As for Repo Man, no one can call him two faced because if he had another face he would certainly be wearing it right now. Combs’ suggestion that the Nasty Boys are only successful due to luck is enough to get him chased to the floor and we’re ready to go.

House is cleaned to start but Heenan has a special announcement: Shawn Michaels has left the building! Monsoon: “WHO CARES???” Duggan and Sags get things going with Jim taking over via some clotheslines. It’s off to Slaughter vs. Knobbs and Slaughter, who has gone from bad to good and from main eventing last year to this, elbows him in the ribs. Boss Man misses a corner splash and it’s off to Repo who jumps into a low blow.

Virgil’s cross body gets two as Heenan thinks the protective mask makes Virgil look like a spotted owl. The bad guys take over until Mountie dives into a spinebuster from the illegal Boss Man. Some law enforcement. Everything breaks down and Sags removes Virgil’s mask, only to knock Knobbs out with it by mistake, giving Virgil the pin at 6:31. Minor note: Danny Davis was referee despite being banned for life plus ten years back in 1987.

Rating: D. Total mess here but that was kind of the point. This was a good example of how far you can fall in just a year as the Nasty Boys, Slaughter and Boss Man were all in title matches last year and now they’re just filling in spots in a multi-man match to make sure they’re all on the show.

Flair and manager Mr. Perfect (out of the ring due to a back injury) look at the centerfold of Elizabeth and say she’s as close to perfect as you can be. Flair says this is Elizabeth’s last chance at Space Mountain. Perfect: “Can I come with you?”

Savage isn’t giving interviews and Gene thinks it might be because he’s getting ready for his WWF World Title shot.

WWF World Title: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

Flair is defending and Heenan is practically worshiping him on commentary. Elizabeth is nowhere in sight and Savage is wrestling in full body attire instead of just tights. Savage goes after Flair in the aisle but Perfect pulls him off to draw away Savage’s attention. They get inside with Randy hammering away until Flair backdrops him over the top in a great looking crash.

Back in and a suplex gets two for the champ as Heenan wants to stand up for a better view. Heenan: “SHOW ME THE PICTURES! I WANT TO SEE IT ON THE BIG SCREEN!” That sounded dirty even by Heenan’s standards. Ric sends him to the floor and drives Savage’s back into the barricade, followed by another suplex for two more. A neckbreaker puts the champ down and a simple move like that freaks the fans out.

Flair goes up but Savage slams him down, even going to the bottom rope (you don’t see that very often) for some extra impact. Heenan is losing his mind as Savage gets two off a clothesline. The champ is knocked to the floor and the top rope ax handle drives him into the barricade, drawing blood (via an obvious blade job from Flair, earning him a lot of heat backstage). The Flair Flop on the floor leaves blood on the mats and Heenan is on the verge of tears.

Back in and another top rope ax handle gets two. There’s the elbow but Perfect comes in and pulls Savage off, which still isn’t a DQ. As the referee throws him out, Perfect throws Flair a foreign object (how did the referee not see that?) to knock Savage silly. It’s still only good for two and you can see the fans going crazy at every move. The referee yells at Flair, allowing Perfect to hit Savage in the knee with a chair.

Cue Elizabeth to come down despite a bunch of backstage people (including Shane McMahon) trying to hold her back. Flair starts in on the knee with a knee crusher and the Figure Four as the agents are still trying to get Elizabeth out of here. Perfect gets caught helping Ric though and the hold is broken. Savage’s small package gets two and Flair kicks at the leg even more, saying this one is for Elizabeth. Flair picks up the leg but Savage punches him in the face, knocking the champ into a rollup (with Savage grabbing the trunks) for the pin and the title at 18:01.

Rating: A. Oh yeah it’s awesome. This was more proof that a different style could work in the main event and title scene as this was as far away from the Hogan style than you could get. It’s an excellent match with Flair working over the knee as much as he could until Savage used the same tactics Flair used against him to win with all the heart carrying him to the finish. Great stuff here and well worth seeing.

Flair goes after Elizabeth again and kisses her, earning a slap in the face. Savage is right on top of him but Perfect gets in another shot at the leg to put the new champion down. Flair works him over a bit more until agents get the bad guys out of the ring, leaving Savage and Elizabeth to celebrate under the fireworks.

Perfect and Heenan rant about Savage stealing the trunks and argue over whether there’s anything to worry about. Flair is the only calm one (when will you ever see that again?) and claims that Savage is a false champion. Elizabeth is a Jezebel too. Flair and company are going to reassemble the team and dare Savage to do it again. Savage is going to be damaged goods just like his old lady. It was Savage out there taking shortcuts and Heenan freaks out over the trunks. This was a great delusional heel promo with the three of them ignoring every question from Mooney about all their cheating and only focusing on Savage.

Savage says he doesn’t care what anyone says because he has what makes Flair tick. That was just a piece of what he wants to do to Flair. Ric hasn’t been beaten up properly yet and it’s going to happen soon. These promos are excellent and make the feud even better, which is quite the task.

We’re in intermission now as we recap Sid vs. Hogan with Sid freaking out over Hogan getting the title shot at Wrestlemania. He has a point here as Hogan was eliminated from the Royal Rumble first and had no real claim to being #1 contender. Sid went full on psycho by destroying the injured Brutus Beefcake’s Barber Shop (ANOTHER interview segment which everyone seemed to have back then) with a chair. This is most memorable due to Sid winding up with shampoo all over his face and chest.

Some Lumbee Indians (from Tatanka’s tribe) are dancing in the ring.

Rick Martel thinks there might not be a match with Tatanka tonight because Tatanka is still outside scalping tickets. That joke hurt my soul.

Tatanka vs. Rick Martel

Tatanka is undefeated at this point and only debuted about two months ago. Heenan explains his stance on the Flair match and promises that the team will be back. Gorilla: “YOU’RE A LIAR!” Heenan: “You’re not going to get me upset!” Gorilla: “YOU’RE A LIAR!” Heenan: “PUT EM UP!” Tatanka sends Martel out to the floor and then into the post as the announcers argue over where the Lumbee Indians are from. Martel throws Tatanka to the floor and starts hammering away as this is already getting dull. Tatanka crotches him on the top and hits a quick cross body for the pin at 4:31.

Rating: D. This was just your cool down match after the big title change. Tatanka would settle in to a good midcard spot while Martel is in the same place that Snuka was in last year. Nothing to see here but it gave the crowd a chance to breathe so it’s kind of a necessary evil.

Money Inc. (Ted DiBiase and I.R.S., Irwin R. Schyster, formerly known as Mike Rotundo and now an evil accountant) are ready for the Natural Disasters (Earthquake and Typhoon, a fellow 400lb monster) because they have Jimmy Hart in their corner. Hart used to manage the Disasters so he knows all their secrets.

The Disasters are ready too.

Gorilla gives us the Hotline number. That’s very WCW of him.

Tag Team Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

I.R.S. runs away from Earthquake to start so it’s off to DiBiase after no contact. Gorilla needles Heenan about Flair’s loss as Earthquake shoves DiBiase around with ease. The champs bail to the floor until it’s back to I.R.S., who has as much luck as his partner did. Typhoon comes in and steps on I.R.S.’ tie to keep him from escaping.

DiBiase’s right hands work a bit better and Typhoon misses a charge to fall out to the floor. A double back elbow drops Typhoon and it’s off to a front facelock from I.R.S. Back to DiBiase for a double clothesline as Gorilla is running out of ways to bring up Flair’s loss. Earthquake gets the tag and the fans just do not care. I.R.S. gets crushed by Typhoon’s splash but DiBiase pulls him to the floor and they take the countout at 8:36.

Rating: F+. It was dull, it was longer than it needed to be, the fans were bored out of their minds, and this changes nothing. This felt like a house show match that somehow got onto the pay per view. Allegedly this was supposed to be the Legion of Doom getting the shot but Hawk wasn’t really capable of being sane at this point.

Brutus Beefcake is here to support Hogan.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Owen’s baggy purple pants with checkered suspenders deserve a mention. Skinner is an alligator wrestler from Florida who chews a lot of tobacco. Owen is in early trouble and a quick reverse DDT gives Skinner too. Not that it matters as Owen skins the cat and rolls Skinner up for the pin at 1:10. Now that’s a filler match.

Sid doesn’t want to hear from Gene, calling him a stupid fat little oaf. He’ll prove that he’s the master and the ruler of the world. Sid looks at a clip of Hogan saying he’s not sure if this is going to be his retirement match. If it is, Vince thanks him for the memories over the years. Sid doesn’t care about the memories and curses Hogan because he can.

Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan

Sid’s squirrely manager Dr. Harvey Wippleman (complete with a medical bag) handles Sid’s introduction. Sid tries to jump Hogan during the entrance but Hogan punches him down and clotheslines Sid out to the floor before the music even stops playing. Justice gets back inside for the staredown and a knee to the ribs has Hogan in trouble. Some more right hands send Sid outside again and the slow start continues.

We get the test of strength and Hogan goes down (he’s really kind of bad at these things), followed by a bad looking chokeslam. Sid poses instead of covering and starts hammering on the back to set up the powerbomb. We hit the nerve hold on Hogan and this match needs to die already.

The powerbomb gets two and it’s Hulk Up time. Hogan gets the slam and drops the leg….for two. This was supposed to be Papa Shango running in for the DQ but, depending on who you ask, Shango either missed his run-in or the company screwed Hogan over in case he was leaving. Wippleman comes in after the two instead and it’s a DQ at 12:26.

Rating: F. If this is the best Hogan can do, he needs to leave already. This was a horrible match with neither guy looking interested in trying anything out there. The ending makes it even worse and while you can’t blame the wrestlers for it, you can hold it against the match as a whole. Horrible match and one of the worst main events in the show’s history.

Hogan gets beaten down by both guys but the Ultimate Warrior returns from an eight month hiatus (read as firing) and makes the save. The traditional posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Much like last year, there’s some great stuff on the show but at the same time there’s a lot of stuff holding it back. The main event in particular this year was a disaster but Warrior’s return was a big surprise and a great moment. They’re starting to get the Wrestlemania formula down but there are still a lot of bugs they need to work out, including a lot of the worthless filler.

That being said, this show was by far and away easier to sit through than the previous years with about fifty minutes cut off. It gives things a better flow and stops spending so much time on unimportant stuff, such as a way too long celebrity segment. This was good enough, but still not a great show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania VIII
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re into another huge stadium here and the interesting thing is that Hogan, while in the final match, isn’t in the title scene at all. We’ve got a double main event here of Hogan vs. Sid in Hogan’s “retirement” match and the still pretty new Flair defending the world title against Randy Savage in a match built not only around the title but also Liz, which we’ll get into later. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how it’s a double main event. They’re not really going for the epic feeling here it seems.

Reba McIntyre sings the national anthem.

Tito Santana vs. Shawn Michaels

Tito is El Matador now and Shawn is freshly heel. Bobby says Reba is Tito’s sister: Arriba McIntyre. Say it out loud and you’ll get the joke. After taking forever to get Sherri to the floor, Tito gets a fast two off a cross body. They head to the mat for a headlock on Shawn which doesn’t last long. Michaels avoids a punch to the face but gets clotheslined out to the floor instead.

Back to the chinlock which doesn’t go anywhere this time either, so Shawn takes over in the corner. That also goes nowhere so Santana punches him in the face and takes it right back to the mat. Shawn finally comes back and pounds away even more, this time sending Tito out to the floor. A backbreaker gets two for Shawn and we hit the chinlock again, this time by the future world champion. Santana fights up but walks into the superkick for no cover.

The Backdrop Suplex (Shawn’s old finisher) is countered and there’s the flying forearm to send Shawn to the floor. Back in and a slingshot forearm puts Shawn down again as does a big atomic drop. Tito’s forearm to the back of the head sends Shawn to the outside again, only to have Sherri trip Tito up on a suplex attempt to give Michaels the pin.

Rating: C. This was ok but it was a lot of kicking and chinlocks for an opening match. Tito was good for giving you a guaranteed decent performance out there, so putting him against Shawn was a good move for the most part. The match wasn’t great or anything but it did a decent job at what it was supposed to do.

Gene is on the old school interview platform and calls out the Legion of Doom. With them however is their former manager Paul Ellering complete with the rolled up Wall Street Journal. Ellering talks about bringing the LOD together before talking about how this is the beginning of the end. They want the tag titles back but would never get them again. Hawk says they were a runaway train, but now look who’s driving it. They don’t care who the champions are, because they’re coming for the gold.

Jake Roberts says there’s no truth to the rumor of him bringing a snake to the ring. We get a clip of Jake slamming Taker’s hand in a coffin and laying out a helpless Paul Bearer.

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

A right hand to the face has no effect on Taker so Jake pounds away so more. Heenan is already freaking out about how Taker can’t be hurt as is his custom. Jake knocks him to the floor but Undertaker lands on his feet. Roberts is pulled to the floor as well and rammed into the post to give the dead man control. Heenan cracks jokes and says he thinks he has two brilliant minds. Gorilla: “I’m in big trouble.”

As Heenan talks about Bearer earning the Urn, Taker chokes away in the corner and pounds on Jake for a bit. An elbow drop keeps Jake down and there’s the jumping clothesline for good measure. Out of NOWHERE, Jake hits the DDT to put Taker down but he sits up a few seconds later and grabs Jake by the throat. A second DDT puts Taker down again but Jake goes after Bearer instead. There’s the sit up and Undertaker follows Jake outside, hitting a tombstone on the FLOOR to end Jake and make Undertaker 2-0.

Rating: C-. The problem with these early Wrestlemania matches for Undertaker is that they didn’t have a ton of story or drama to them. Jake was in his last match for the company here before he went to WCW for a cup of coffee, so he didn’t seem to be giving it his all out there. The kicking out of the DDTs was impressive as was the Tombstone, but that’s about it.

Piper and Bret are facing each other later tonight and Piper talks about growing up near the Hart Family. Some jokes are cracked and Bret doesn’t take too kindly to it. Things get testy when Bret wants the IC Title back. This is much more of a match of respect than hatred.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. Bret Hart

Piper is defending. There’s a story here actually: Bret was “sick” and lost the title to Mountie, only to have Piper win it about a day and a half later. This is Bret’s rematch. Heenan: “How would you handle Piper if you were Bret?” Gorilla: “I would use my speed advantage. You?” Heenan: “Waffle him with a tire iron.” Bret takes him down to start and Piper spits in his face, basically becoming the heel of the match early on.

They trade arm holds to start but Piper can’t escape Bret’s non-evil clutches. Once he finally frees himself, it’s a dropkick to put Roddy down instead. Bret might have hurt his shoulder in the process, but of course he’s goldbricking, which gives him a two count via a small package. Piper slaps him in the face so Bret cross bodies both guys to the outside. Back in and Piper gets in a cheap shot which apparently busts Bret open. This was a big deal actually as Bret claimed it was a legit cut but in reality he bladed and lied to prevent punishment and still make it look good. Smart guy that Hitman.

Roddy pounds away for awhile and is reverting to his old style far more than he has in years. Bret comes back with a sunset flip for two and the mat is getting bloody in a hurry. Piper punches him down for two but Bret comes back with a forearm to send the champion to the outside. Back in and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Piper’s head lands on Bret’s ribs which should be a count but the referee sits up instead. Roddy goes up but Bret is goldbricking again, allowing him to slam Piper face first into the mat.

A suplex gets two for Hart and it’s time for the FIVE MOVES OF DOOM. Piper blocks the Sharpshooter though, so Bret settles for the middle rope elbow. Roddy blocks that too though with a boot to the face and they slug it out again. There goes the referee and Piper clotheslines Bret to the outside. As they come back in, Roddy grabs the ring bell to complete the heel turn. He lifts it up to crush Bret, only to stop himself and put on a sleeper instead. That proves to be his downfall though as Bret climbs up the corner and falls back on Piper for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. This might be Piper’s best matches ever but even rarer is seeing him pinned in the WWF. Piper was VERY protective of his character, meaning that he was very rarely pinned. The match was great here and wound up being Piper’s last match in the company for several years. Really good stuff here as Bret is on the verge of shooting up the card to the world title in the fall.

Piper puts the title on Hart after thinking about clocking him with the belt.

We hear from WBF Bodybuilding Pro Lex Luger. He wouldn’t have a major appearance again until January of 1993. Again, who thought bodybuilding on PPV was a good idea? That would be Mr. XFL, Vince McMahon.

The Mountie, the Nasty Boys and the Repo Man laugh evily.

Duggan, Slaughter, Virgil and Boss Man respond with nothing of note to say.

Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter/Virgil/Big Boss Man vs. Nasty Boys/Moutnie/Repo Man

Just a collection of lower midcard guys getting a Wrestlemania payday here. Neither team gets an entrance. Instead, Ray Combs of Family Feud is guest ring announcer for this and cracks a few jokes about the heels pre-match. The good guys clean house to start and hit a quadruple clothesline to clear the ring. Heenan announces that Shawn Michaels has left the building. Gorilla sums up our responses: “WHO CARES???”

Anyway Duggan and Sags start things off and it’s Jim hitting a few clotheslines to take over. Off to Slaughter who gets poked in the eye, allowing for the tag to Knobs. Slaughter pounds away to take over before it’s off to Boss Man for a boot to the face. Brian avoids a charge into the corner and Boss Man’s splash misses Repo Man as well, giving the heels control for a bit. Repo crotches himself and Boss Man slugs him down for good measure.

Off to Virgil who seems to mess up almost anything where he jumps into the air. Duggan tries to come in to save his partner but it’s back to Sags to beat on Virgil even more. A pumphandle slam gets two on Virgil and it’s back to Mountie. Everything breaks down and in the melee the Nastys are rammed together, allowing Virgil to steal the pin.

Rating: D. As I said, this was nothing more than a way to throw a bunch of guys onto the show at the same time. This was a much better idea than having four matches eat up a few minutes each as it accomplishes the same goal here. They were out there as filler before the world title match and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.

Flair and Perfect smile over having a large centerfold of Miss Elizabeth. I can’t imagine how teasing this angle was for thirteen year old boys. They say Savage is losing tonight and that Liz is leaving with Flair.

Savage won’t give any interviews.

To recap the world title match, Flair claims that he had a relationship with Liz before she was married to Savage, so tonight Savage is out for revenge and the title. Flair had some doctored photos and that’s about it, so it was more about humiliation than anything else. It’s a great angle and would still work perfectly to this day if done right.

WWF World Title: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

There’s no Liz in sight to start and Savage comes to the ring last. Oh and Mr. Perfect is in Flair’s corner which will come into play later. Flair tries to walk up the aisle so Savage decks him from behind. Perfect makes a save by throwing Randy down as things are looking chaotic already. They get into the ring and Savage starts fast with some shots into the corner and punches down onto Flair’s head.

Heenan is at his most biased ever and his voice is almost cracking already. A clothesline puts Flair down and a back elbow gets two. Flair comes back with a big backdrop to put Savage out on the floor as the champion takes over. Flair rams Savage’s back into the apron and takes over with a few suplexes including a belly to back for two. Heenan wants to see the pictures and I can’t say I blame him.

A big chop puts Savage down for two and we head to the floor. Savage has his back rammed into the apron again and Flair suplexes him back into the ring for two more. Randy comes back with a single right hand and the place ERUPTS. A swinging neckbreaker puts Flair down but he pokes Savage in the eye to take him down. The champ goes up top, only to jump into a clothesline from Savage. Savage whips him into the corner and we get a Flair Flip to the apron where Ric runs up top, only to jump into another clothesline for two.

Savage hits his third clothesline in a roll to send Flair out to the floor. A top rope ax handle sends Flair into the barricade followed by a shot into the post. Flair is busted open and there’s the Flair Flop on the floor. A suplex puts Flair down on the floor again as Heenan is begging for the match to be stopped. Back in and Savage pounds away before hitting a top rope ax handle for two.

The top rope elbow hits but Perfect breaks up the pin. Thankfully the referee doesn’t call for the bell as Perfect throws something to Ric. The referee is bumped but it’s not that bad. A shot to the face with the object puts Randy down but it only gets two. The fans are losing their minds on these kickouts. Flair pounds away and is pulled away by the referee, allowing Perfect to blast him in the knee with a chair.

This brings out Liz who marches through some suits (one of which being worn by Shane McMahon) as Flair works over the leg. The knee crusher sets up the Figure Four (complete with interference from Perfect). Heenan: “SHOW ME THE PICTURES!” Randy turns the hold over but Flair breaks it quickly. Savage’s leg is done but he grabs a two count off a small package. Flair says this is for Liz as he stomps on the knee even more. He grabs Savage’s leg but Savage gets in a quick right hand and rolls Flair up (with a handful of trunks) for the pin and the title.

Rating: A. If you ever want a match based on the good guy overcoming insurmountable odds, this is pretty high up on the list. Savage came back from EVERYTHING and while Liz was there, she wasn’t a major factor at all. The match is a masterpiece with both guys looking great. Savage was in a career resurgence, despite being world champion only three years earlier. Anyway, great match here and it still holds up very well today.

Post match Flair tries to kiss Liz, triggering another brawl. Perfect helps take Savage down and lets Flair pound away for a bit. Referees finally break it up and Savage is announced as the new champion to a big roar.

Flair, Perfect and Heenan go on a huge rant against Savage with Flair saying that Savage is going to be lying about being champion and lying about having the love of Liz. They tell Savage to do it again and claim that Savage was a cheater which won’t work again.

Savage gives a rebuttal, saying that he’s going to go after Flair no matter where or when it is. He hands Liz the title and says that it’s hers. As for Flair, Savage is for him and it’s going to continue. I love these two promos and they still work very well.

We recap the Wrestlemania VII press conference where Hogan was announced as the #1 contender. Sid wasn’t happy but joined Hogan in a tag match on SNME. However he turned on Hogan and left him alone against Undertaker and Flair. Sid then destroyed Beefcake’s Barber Shop set and wound up with a bunch of shampoo on his face in an unintentionally hilarious scene. We also get a montage of Sid beating up jobbers and Virgil.

Rick Martel makes a stupid joke about Tatanka scalping tickets.

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

There are Indians at ringside chanting for Tatanka. This is about two months after Tatanka debuted on TV so you should be able to figure out what’s going to happen pretty quickly here. Tatanka start off hot as Heenan explaining that Flair did nothing wrong. Gorilla shouts that Heenan is a liar, so Heenan challenges him to a fight. Martel makes a quick comeback and sends Tatanka out to the floor. Back in and Bobby makes Indian jokes as Martel stomps away a bit more. Rick goes up and gets crotched, allowing Tatanka to pound away even more. Out of nowhere a cross body pins Martel.

Rating: D+. The match was ok but it was nothing more than a way to give the fans a breather. Like I said, no one knew Tatanka at this point due to how little time he had been on TV. Martel was in total jobber to the stars territory by this point and would be gone pretty soon. Nothing to remember here at all.

Money Inc. isn’t worried about the Natural Disasters because they’ve stolen the Disasters’ manager in the form of Jimmy Hart.

The Disasters say they’re ready and are after the titles and Jimmy Hart.

Tag Titles: Money Inc. vs. Natural Disasters

Money Inc. is defending and is comprised of Ted DiBiase and I.R.S. DiBiase and Earthquake start things off with the heels (Money Inc.) getting beaten down and the rich man being knocked to the floor. Off to Typhoon vs. I.R.S. For osme arm work by the big guy. Typhoon misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to DiBiase….who is immediately beaten down as well. Typhoon misses a splash against the ropes and falls over the top and out to the floor.

I.R.S. cranks on a front facelock for a bit as Ted hits an ax handle off the middle rope for two. A double clothesline puts both guys down as this match is DRAGGING. Everything breaks down and the challengers take over. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and there’s the big splash from Typhoon. Jimmy Hart pulls Irwin out to break up the Earthquake splash and the champions walk out to retain the titles.

Rating: D-. I have no idea what the point of this was. The match wasn’t entertaining, it wasn’t good, and the match didn’t accomplish anything. I’m guessing this was supposed to be filler between the other matches, but we already had one of those and that’s what we’re about to get next. Nothing to see here at all.

Brutus Beefcake supports Hogan.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Skinner catches him with the tobacco juice to the face to start and hits a shoulder breaker for no cover. Skinner’s reverse DDT gets two but Owen gets tired of selling and rolls him up for the pin. This was about a minute long.

Gene is with Sid and the tall man calls him a fat bald headed oaf. Sid guarantees this is Hogan’s last match, which triggers an interview with Hogan where he says he isn’t sure if he’s retiring or not. Sid doesn’t care.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

With the music still playing, Sid jumps Hogan but Hulk pounds back and knocks Sid to the apron. The music is still playing and Hogan hits a forearm to the chest and a clothesline to put Sid on the floor. AWESOME opening sequence here and it still works really well. Back in and they stare each other down but Hogan knocks Sid right back out to the floor. Back in again and Sid wants a test of strength.

Sid puts Hogan down but Hulk makes the big comeback to the delight of the crowd. Justice gets knocked into the corner but Sid’s manager Harvey Wippleman (totally unneeded here) distracts Hulk, allowing a chokeslam to put him down. Hulk gets knocked to the floor and hit with Wippleman’s bag, setting up a nerve hold by Sid.

Hogan fights up, only to get put right back down in a side slam. The powerbomb gets two and it’s Hulk Up time. Sid eats a few buckles and it’s big boot, slam, legdrop….TWO? This is assumed to be a screwjob by Sid but in reality, the scheduled run-in by someone we’ll name in a second was late so Sid had to kick out. Anyway there’s the DQ by Wippleman to end things.

Rating: D. Well that sucked. It’s about twelve minutes long and went nowhere at all due to the majority of the match being spent in a nerve hold. Well maybe not the majority but far longer than it should have been. Anyway, this was nothing of note and saving Sid was stupid due to him being gone in a few weeks due to failing a drug test. Nothing to see here, until after the match.

Post match, Papa Shango of all people (the guy who missed his cue) runs out and beats down Hogan along with Sid until the Ultimate Warrior makes a legitimately shocking return for the save. A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. You have two classics, a huge shocking return, and some other decent stuff in there. What else do you want from a Wrestlemania, especially in 1992. Good stuff here as the Hogan era is definitely coming to a close. He would somehow get another world title the next year and the main event here sucked, but things were moving beyond him and it was clear that things would survive. Good stuff here.

Ratings Comparison

Shawn Michaels vs. Tito Santana

Original: B-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Jake Roberts

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Original: A

Redo: B+

Big Boss Man/Virgil/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Repo Man/Nasty Boys/Mountie

Original: F

Redo: D

Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair

Original: A+

Redo: A

Tatanka vs. Rick Martel

Original: D

Redo: D+

Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

Original: D-

Redo: D-

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: D

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

It’s the same overall despite some of the main stuff being different. That’s interesting.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/15/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-8-hogan-who-needs-the-bald-man/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania 8
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosierdome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Star Spangled Banner: Reba McEntireThis was an interesting entry in the series as well. You could clearly see things beginning to change in the WWF at this point. Ric Flair had arrived and was the reigning WWF Champion, Hulk Hogan was talking about retirement, Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels were singles wrestlers, and a lot of the goofiness was gone. This show was billed as possibly Hogan’s farewell match which was a really strange thing to hear no matter who you were.

Hogan had been the face of the company for nearly ten years and the possibility of him leaving was a scary though. This show also was different in that it cut down the number of matches from 12-14 to 9, which cut out a lot of the mindless filler and gave more important matches more time. It was held under a dome, just like WM 3 and had a very large crowd.The WWF Title wasn’t on the line in the last match of the show but rather in the middle, which was another rarity. Anyway, on with the show! A running joke of the show is that Elizabeth allegedly dated Ric and posed for adult photographs for him which Flair promised to show. To the best of my knowledge, nothing ever came of this.

We open with Reba McEntire singing the National Anthem which is a nice thing to hear again. She is eventually helped out of the ring by Tito “El Matador” Santana.

Tito Santana vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is finally full heel after the legendary barber shop window incident. You can tell Heenan is rolling tonight as he gets in a great line almost immediately by saying he things Tito and Reba are siblings. “Sure. That’s Arriba McEntire.” I love listening to Heenan when he’s on his game and he certainly is here. We get the old school orgasm sounding music with Sherri “singing.”Shawn has challenged the winner of the IC Title match apparently. We waste some time as Sherri de-jackets Shawn. They imply there are some heel shenanigans coming. We get started and naturally it’s fast paced. A headlock keeps Tito in control and we have a special 900 number. There is some demon child shouting in an EVIL voice at Shawn and it’s kind of creepy.

Back in and Tito is dominating for the most part. We get a LONG headlock by Tito but they somehow keep it entertaining. That’s the difference between talented guys and generic guys: talented guys keep things moving even during things like these. They’re trying to get rollups and fight out of the hold and move around. They make it a contest which gives the fans something to keep their interest. That’s very important and separates the greats from the regulars.

Tito gets knocked over the top and is all dizzy headed. Where’s Jesse to say it’s because of a bad taco? Now Shawn hits the chinlock and has Tito in trouble. Tito gets up and walks into what would evolve into Sweet Chin Music. I guess here it’s Sour Jaw Humming? The Tear Drop Suplex, Shawn’s finisher, is blocked and the forearm connects to send Shawn to the floor.

Tito beats the tar out of him on the floor and gets a slingshot forearm/shoulder to have Shawn in real trouble. Shawn’s bumping like a madman because it’s Wrestlemania. The forearm hits and Shawn goes outside again. And then we get what has to be a botched ending as Tito goes to suplex him back in but Shawn falls on him for the pin. I guess Sherri was supposed to cheat but they messed it up somehow. That’s all I can come up with for that ending.

Rating: B-. Rather solid stuff here with both guys knowing exactly what to do out there. The scary thing is that Shawn would get about ten times better in about two or three years. This was fine for an opener and it worked well for what it was supposed to do. Good stuff from two good workers.

The Legion of Doom are tired of being off center. They bring back Paul Ellering. Who’s Paul Ellering you ask? That’s the same question most of the people have. What they fail to mention is Ellering was their manager during their hottest period in the NWA. Without knowing that, this interview makes little sense.

The Legion of Doom are tired of being off center. They bring back Paul Ellering. Who’s Paul Ellering you ask? That’s the same question most of the people have. What they fail to mention is Ellering was their manager during their hottest period in the NWA. Without knowing that, this interview makes little sense.

Jake Roberts isn’t afraid of the Undertaker. This feud goes back a long way actually. Roberts and Taker had both been heels and had crashed Savage’s and Liz’s wedding. Jake and Savage had a match, after which Jake was waiting backstage to hit Liz with a chair. Taker stopped this, turning face in the process.

Jake had been a guest on Taker’s show, The Funeral Parlor. He had locked Taker’s hand in a casket and DDTed Paul Bearer before attacking Taker with a chair. This did absolutely nothing though. Taker says Jake needs to be ready to meet his maker. It’s Jake’s last match as he would go to WCW and fight Sting for awhile in a totally forgotten feud.

Undertaker vs. Jake Roberts

Talk about a contrast between the previous match and this one. This likely isn’t going to be anything special at all to put it mildly. Bobby suggests Jake has a chance here. That’s so cute. We hit the floor almost immediately with Taker dominating. He’s the face here if I didn’t mention that.

Pure dominance here as we get Munsters and Addams Family references from Heenan, who feels like he has two brilliant minds on occasion. This match is meandering pretty badly here. DDT out of NOWHERE and the crowd is stunned. Could the Streak be over at one??? Taker sits up before Jake gets to his feet which is unthinkable.

Short arm clothesline and Taker is up again. Jake PLANTS him with another DDT and goes after Paul. Taker sits up again. If those had been KB DDTs he would have stayed down. Taker goes after Jake and a Tombstone on the floor ends Jake’s WWF run in emphatic style. The pin is of course academic.

Rating: D+. Nothing that great here but I’ve seen worse. They were still going for ways to make Taker look awesome as they had no idea what to do with him. They knew he was something special and he’s a former WWF Champion but at the same time, what do you do with him? It was a problem they had until a guy named Mankind showed up.

Brutus Beefcake is here for some reason.

We see a double interview with IC Champion Roddy Piper and challenger Bret Hart. Bret is serious and Roddy isn’t. This doesn’t sit well with Bret and we’re ready to go. There are peanut butter and jelly sandwiches mentioned, making me hungry.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Staredown to start as this should be awesome to put it mildly. Arm drag by Piper to start which surprises Bret to put it mildly. Bret does the same and down goes Piper. This is shaping up well. Gorilla gives his strategy for the match from both perspectives. Heenan: I’d nail them out back with a tire iron.

After some nice amateur stuff Piper spits at Bret to make sure everyone knows he’s the heel. Test of Strength which is odd to see from guys like this. Bret grabs the arm and Piper can’t fight out of it. Gorilla lists off some of the countries that are watching Mania which is always cool to hear.

Bret hurts his shoulder on an armdrag and of course was faking as Heenan predicted. It results in a small package for two and Piper is hot. Bret gets a cross body and we hit the floor. Back in and Hart adjusts his boot, allowing Piper to lay in an uppercut to be the definite heel in this. That’s certainly the right choice at least. STIFF punch to the face follows.

Bulldog puts Bret down and he’s in trouble. Bret is busted BAD which was an unauthorized blade job but Bret lied and said it was hardway to avoid a fine or suspension. Flair bladed later on and nearly got fired over it. Bret gets a sunset flip out of nowhere to break Piper’s momentum but it just ticks him off and the beating continues.

Heenan again suggests going to get a chair and blast Bret with it. Bret gets a forearm out of nowhere to send Piper to the floor as the demon child from the Shawn match is at it again, this time in the pink corner. Both guys go down and Piper’s head is on Bret’s stomach but it’s not classified as a cover for no apparent reason. Heenan counts anyway but it doesn’t count of course because that’s not the finish.

Piper goes up so Bret drags him down by the hair. FREAKING…..nah it wasn’t that bad. Snap suplex gets two. Bret unleashes the Five Moves of Doom but the Sharpshooter is blocked. Well of course it was as he didn’t go for the elbow yet. He tries it out of order and gets caught by a boot. They slug it out from their knees and Bret takes control again.

Down goes the referee as we set up the ending. Bret eats steps and it’s all Piper here. Piper grabs the bell but can’t bring himself to swing it, thus preserving his face status. Heenan: “USE THE BELL! HIT HIM! WAFFLE HIM WITH IT! GIVE IT TO ME I’LL HIT HIM WITH IT!” Piper opts for a sleeper instead but Bret climbs up the ropes and backflips onto Piper for the pin to regain the title.

Rating: A. This match is as solid as they come. There’s very little that I find wrong with it aside from possibly the ending. Piper not using the bell was perfect, but after that it’s like they were told they had to end it immediately, which to me wasn’t good. Aside from that brief moment though, this was an excellent match.

Piper gives Bret the belt post match.

Bobby Heenan has a surprise, and he introduces via satellite, Lex Luger. Lex is a totally arrogant bastard here and he does it perfectly. This takes far longer than it should have.

Duggan, Slaughter, Virgil and Bossman make generic insults to their opponents.

The Nasties, Repo Man and Mountie counter with even weaker promos.

Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter/Virgil/Big Bossman vs. Nasty Boys/Repo Man/The Mountie

Good night who picked these teams? It’s like a great melting pot of the undercard. This match is introduced by Ray Combs who was a popular game show host at the time. He makes some bad jokes at the expense of the heels. One decent line: “Repo Man was an unwanted child. His parents were hoping for a boy.”

My goodness how far have these guys fallen since last year? Nastys were tag champions, Mountie had been the IC Champion earlier that year, Bossman was in the IC Title match last year and Virgil had a fairly high profile match. Quadruple clothesline takes down everyone not named Repo Man. There are going to be WWF guys on Family Feud against World Bodybuilding guys.

Duggan vs. Sags starts us off officially. It’s a huge trainwreck of course with no real reason for anyone to be in there against anyone as none of these people were feuding at all. Everyone fights everyone for a little bit and nothing stands out whatsoever. Everything goes insane of course and the Nasties screw up, allowing Virgil to pin Knobbs.

Rating: F. No one cared and the match was a mess. This has to be a sold out crowd now with as much filler as we just saw. Awful match and at least it was short.

We recap Flair vs. Savage. Flair had arrived in November with the WCW Title, which is one of the most complicated stories in wrestling history so I’ll stay out of why he was allowed to have it, and claimed he was the REAL world champion. Due to him helping Taker beat Hogan for the WWF Title and the controversial way that Hogan won it back, the title was declared vacant. The winner of the 92 Rumble would be the new champion. Flair wins after Sid eliminated Hogan and Hogan pulls out Sid.

Flair and Perfect have a picture that is allegedly Liz from photos that she gave him before she met Macho. They had threatened to put these up on the big screen for everyone to see. This had been built up for months as the main feud in the company with neither one really having a clear advantage.

Flair had all these stories about he and Liz and some clearly doctored photos of the two, but nothing ever concrete. Macho Man won’t talk to Gene. However he will talk for a Coliseum Video exclusive. He says nothing of note.

This was supposed to be Hogan vs. Flair. Why that match never took place has never really been answered for sure, but the common answer is that the WWF started a real steroid policy and Hogan knew he was in trouble. After this show he took a near 8 month hiatus from the company, which even furthers that theory.

WWF World Title: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

What makes this match work even better is Heenan’s completely biased announcing. He doesn’t even pretend to be fair and it’s great. Savage jumps him in the aisle but Perfect makes the save. Totally personal feud here and even more proof that Hogan wasn’t needed to have a dramatic and great storyline for the world title. Savage no sells an atomic drop and hits a clothesline to take over.

Savage is even more insane here than usual if you can imagine that. Flair manages to backdrop Savage over the top to break his momentum though as Heenan cheers him on. There’s no Liz in sight at the moment. Flair chops away and Savage is in some trouble. Heenan is drooling over the thought of seeing the centerfolds of Liz that Flair promised.

Flair sends him to the floor and keeps working on the back. Total dominance here as Savage is sent back in. Savage gets a punch in and the fans pop huge just for that. A neckbreaker out of nowhere puts Flair down. Heenan needs a drink. He must have never been thirsty in WCW. Flair is slammed off the top with Savage stepping onto the bottom rope which isn’t something I’ve ever seen before.

Savage unleashes the clotheslines and even gets one as Flair is coming off the top for a long two. Heenan nearly had a heart attack off of that one. Savage sends him to the floor and hits the double axe to send Flair into the railing. He CLEARLY blades on camera which was a huge ordeal backstage as it wasn’t authorized at all and they nearly fired him over it. It’s a good one too.

Double axe off the top gets two. Crowd is WAY into this. The elbow hits but Perfect dives in for the save at the last possible second. Hebner doesn’t throw it out though and all three of the heels are furious. Perfect throws Flair an illegal object and Savage is knocked out cold….FOR TWO! The place erupts on the kickout and Heenan is beside himself.

Perfect grabs a chair and drills Savage in the knee (although it looked like he hit the knee that Savage isn’t holding) and the challenger is in trouble. Here comes Liz! A group of suits try to stop her, and one of them looks like a big dollar sign. As he’s coming down the aisle, he looks like money. You would be able to say HERE COMES THE MONEY. (It’s Shane McMahon if you have no idea what I’m going on aboug).

Flair goes after the knee like a shark smelling a big pile of Shark Chow and the Figure Four goes on. Like an IDIOT, Flair slaps Savage for not staying down. After literally being in the hold for over a minute Savage turns him over as Perfect cheats for the second time in the hold. Flair goes for a slam but Savage grabs a small package for two as the crowd is losing their collective mind.

Flair WOOs at Liz and hammers away even more. Knee Crusher (to the wrong leg) but Savage spins around and grabs a rollup with a handful of trunks (as we see Flair’s back AGAIN) to win the title again and blow the roof off. Post match Flair hits on Liz and she slaps the heck out of him. Perfect and Flair beat the tar out of Savage post match.

Rating: A+. I don’t love it as much as IC does, but this was amazing stuff. It went on forever and never got boring. The main big thing about this match is simple: there was a huge feud and title match, without Hulk Hogan. That hadn’t happened in almost 10 years and it proved that the WWF could live without him.

That being said, this is a totally underrated classic with both guys going insane and Savage fighting through impossible odds to win the title that he deserved. This was great stuff and of course it goes on halfway through the show as a world title change pales in comparison to Hogan vs. a monster right? Go watch this match as it’s awesome on a ton of levels.

Post match we get two of the best promos I’ve ever seen. You need to see these.

This feud was absolutely amazing on a ton of levels and the matches being great only pushed that further.

We see a clip from the Wrestlemania “press conference” where the #1 contender to the world title was named. Hogan was named the challenger and Sid was furious. He turned on Hogan in a tag match on SNME in a bad match where Hogan managed to beat Flair and Taker on his own afterwards.

Sid destroyed the Barber Shop set and got shampoo all over his face in a typically bad Sid bit. He destroyed a bunch of jobbers to bad 80s music apparently. And that of course transitions us to this.

Tatanka vs. Rick Martel

We get a pure filler here. Heenan’s commentary here is great as he’s trying to be deadly serious but any mention of Flair sets him off. Tatanka has Native Americans with him, despite no one caring at all. Martel just doesn’t care at all here and I can’t say I blame him at all.

If you ever want a textbook example of going through the motions, look right here. Neither care and while they’re not being lazy per se, there’s no story or spark in this match. It’s literally two guys performing moves on each other. Tatanka gets a roll up for the pin. I know that’s short but seriously, NOTHING happened here and there was no point to it being here.

Rating: D. They were kind of trying, but it kind of sucked. Nothing great here at all and just a filler after the title changing hands. Boring match and no one could have cared less. Well ok they probably could but it wouldn’t have been by much.

We see Money Inc. saying that they’re ready for the Natural Disasters. DiBiase is completely different than he was just a year ago, but it works just fine all the same.

The Natural Disasters are coming for the belts.

Tag Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

Heenan is still ticked and it’s still funny. Gorilla singes the praises of the challengers (the big fat guys) which more or less secures their loss here. Quake and IRS start but DiBiase comes in soon afterwards. The challengers overpower DiBiase who runs of course like a scared little girly man.

The big guys dominate as you would expect them to with Quake shoving DiBiase all over the place and then doing the same to IRS for awhile. Typhoon comes in and due to his high level of suck the champions beat him down pretty easily. This isn’t really going anywhere at all.

False hot tag to Earthquake gets us nowhere as we’re waiting to get to the ending so we can get to the “main event” because Hogan has to close out Mania right? Not much of a match going on here with a totally dead crowd. Finally we get the tag to Earthquake, the fat guys dominate and the champions leave to take the countout loss.

Rating: D-. Bad, bad match that no one wanted to see. The whole thing felt like it was weighed down by more weight than half of the Disasters weight multiplied by two. This went nowhere at all. The Disasters would get the titles eventually at a house show.

Brutus Beefcake reaffirms Hogan’s divineness.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

This might last 90 seconds. Skinner hits a reverse DDT that does nothing. Hart rolls him up using the ropes and pins him. This was nothing.

Rating: N/A. Nothing at all here and a waste of time that could have gone to a real match.

Want to join the WWF Fan Club? Actually it does look pretty sweet.

Sid Justice is just hilarious. Anyone that calls Gene a fat blubbering stupid oaf is nothing but sweet.

We see an interview with Hogan and Vince from a week ago as Hulk teases that he’s retiring soon. Sid isn’t pleased.

The point of this match is simple: Sid threw Hogan out of the Rumble and Hogan then pulled Sid out of the Rumble, giving Flair the belt. On a SNME, they teamed up to face Flair and Taker. Sid bailed on Hogan, who somehow still won the match. That brings us here. Hogan has talked about retiring, so this could be his last match. Sid jumps Hogan while his music is still playing. Hogan comes back to his music which is really pretty sweet.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

The match is about what you would expect from these two. Hogan jumps Sid to start and beats him up while the music is playing. We finally slow things down with Sid taking over using, you guessed it, power moves. It’s all either guy can do so that’s what they went with of course.

We go back and forth to start, Sid takes over for awhile, and then Hogan comes back. Test of Strength gets us nowhere. Sid lands a move that I don’t think anyone had seen before in the WWF. It’s like a slam while he’s choking him. I can’t think of a name to use for it though. Anyone have any ideas?

Sid pounds away on Hogan for a good while as you would expect him to. We head to the floor for a bit and nothing happens at all. Now we hit the EVIL nerve hold that doesn’t really do anything. Hogan has had that put on him by people far more useless than Sid though so this gets Sid nowhere at all. Sidewalk Slam gets Sid out of trouble.

Hogan kicks out of Sid’s powerbomb, which was also a very rare move at the time. Hogan makes his standard comeback leading to the boot and slam. Sid kicks out of the legdrop! Sid’s manager Harvey WHipleman interferes causing the DQ, when all of a sudden Papa freaking Shango comes out for the double team.

As they beat on him, for absolutely no good reason the Warrior returns for the first time since about June for the save. This was a legitimate shock as no one believed that he was coming back. It definitely worked though and is a great surprise to end Mania, but it set up no more contact between Hogan and Warrior as far as I can remember. Double pose down to end the show.

Rating: D. It’s Hogan at Mania so it’s at least watchable. The original ending was Hogan has Sid beaten and Shango breaks up the pin for the DQ, but Shango missed his cue. Sid wasn’t being a jerk when he kicked out. He simply didn’t have another option. The ending made little sense though. It led to Warrior vs. Shango (which I was at the blowoff match), yet why Shango attacked was never explained.

As for the match, this was pretty freaking bad. No one bought this as the real main event but it’s Hogan so he has to go on last. The Warrior returning was a great thing but at the end of the day it should have been overshadowed by Savage and the title change. I’m not surprised though. After all it is Hogan.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s certainly not bad, but it’s nothing epic. Why, in Hogan’s last match, wouldn’t he go over clean? The Warrior returning meant nothing at all either. However, the rest of the show has some absolute gems in it. Make sure you see the IC and World Title matches as both are classics.

This show led to Savage holding the title over the Summer yet rarely defending it. Flair would win it back in the Fall before dropping it to Bret Hart just under a year later. Shawn’s singles debut is obviously a big deal and the fillers go by quick. Of the 9 matches, 6 are pretty good if not great so this is an obvious recommendation

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 8, 2019
Location: Sam’s Town Hotel & Gambling Hall, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

I’m not sure what to expect this week as we have the latest round in the main event four way feud, which hasn’t been great so far but last week offered a bit of a twist with Johnny Impact injuring his neck. Other than that we have the in-ring debut of Scarlett Bordeaux, which screams screwy angle. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Preview/recap.

Opening sequence.

Rich Swann vs. Ethan Page

Non-title. Swann starts with his flip over Page and scores with a dropkick, only to get punched into the ropes. A reverse implant DDT gets two and a backbreaker makes things even worse for Swann. Page stops to pose again but it doesn’t seem to matter as he’s fine enough to stomp away in the corner.

A running flip neckbreaker gets Swann out of trouble and sets up the running flip dive to the floor. Swann’s frog splash (heck of a good one too) gets two but he gets crotched on top, setting up a Snowplow for two. They trade forearms, punches and kicks to the face until Swann hits a long string of them, setting up a Lethal Injection. The middle rope Phoenix splash finishes Page at 8:01.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of opener I can get behind. They didn’t stay out there too long but had enough time to put on an entertaining match with both guys getting to show off. Swann is becoming a bigger and bigger star around here and Page has put on consistently good matches for weeks now.

Post match here’s OVE to address Swann again. This is the night that Swann finally joins OVE because Swann has said that Sami Callihan is family. Swann puts on the shirt and the team poses, leaving Swann to lay the three of them out and bail in a scene that worked for Diamond Dallas Page in 1997 and works for Swann here.

LAX asks Konnan to get their rematch for the Tag Team Titles. Konnan says let him do his job and watch the Lucha Bros vs. the Rascalz.

The announcers recap last week’s injuries to Brian Cage and Johnny Impact.

The annoying interviewer tried to talk to Cage and got thrown out.

Ace Austin vs. Jake Atlas

Austin loves cards and maybe some slight of hand magic. Atlas’ wristlock doesn’t work to start and it’s Austin rolling forward with a legsweep and kick to the back. A bicycle kick gives Atlas one and Austin is right back with a double springboard kick to the face. Something like Murphy’s Law takes Austin down for two but he stomps Atlas down and hits a running Blockbuster (the Fold) for the pin at 3:29.

Rating: C-. Atlas got in a lot of offense here but Austin has the charisma and style to make him look like a star. I’ve seen him before and he’s got everything he needs to be a big deal. As usual it depends on how Impact handles him, which has been a hit or miss set of results over the years.

Johnny Impact, in a neck brace, and Taya Valkyrie join us via satellite for an interview with the annoying reporter (this guy has to be a rib on someone). Cage is getting his title shot no matter how bad Johnny’s neck is.

Reno Scum wants a rematch with KM and Fallah Bahh.

Here’s Alisha Edwards for a chat. Her contract expires at the end of this month and she has some decisions to make. She enjoys hitting people with kendo sticks but maybe it’s time to start a family. Cue the Desi Hit Squad with Rohit Raju saying it’s time for a woman to make some sense. Having a family is her job and women need to stay out of the ring. Alisha slaps Gama Singh and here’s Eddie Edwards to clean house with Kenny. The Squad beats him down but Eli Drake makes a rather slow save.

Cage isn’t happy with the reporter, who shows him a clip of something that gets on Cage’s nerves even worse.

Eddie thanks Eli but isn’t interested in going after the Tag Team Titles. Alisha says Eli is all Eddie has left so take what you can get. Eddie agrees to team up against the Desi Hit Squad next week. The one thing I get out of this: Alisha shouldn’t be talking.

GWN Flashback Moment of the Week: Jeremiah Snake (Sami Callihan) vs. Eddie Edwards from last year’s Impact vs. Lucha Underground show.

Moose and Killer Kross are happy with injuring Impact and Cage. They should both get title shots and if they don’t get them, it means more pain.

The Rascalz talk about getting superpowers from a robot. They talk about wearing masks and mock Moose’s pink sports coat.

Su Yung/Undead Maid of Honor/Allie vs. Rosemary/Jordynne Grace/Kiera Hogan

This is the Dark War (meaning it’s fought under a red light) for Allie’s soul and I’d assume anything goes here. James Mitchell is at ringside to make things all the more evil. It’s a brawl to start until we settle down to tagging, because that’s what you do in a War. Kiera throws Yung around to start and we get the Allie vs. Rosemary showdown. At least I think we do as I can barely see what’s going on here.

Grace comes in for a heck of a release German suplex on Allie to give Kiera two but Yung offers a distraction. That’s enough for Allie to snap off a cutter and we take a break. Back with Allie clotheslining Kiera down for two, followed by the slow stomping in the corner. Su grabs an armtrap choke on Kiera but it’s back to Allie, who gets kicked in the head. The hot tag brings in Rosemary for the big showdown and everything breaks down. Rosemary drops Allie and it’s the parade of secondary finishers. Yung mists the Maid by mistake and a spear gives Rosemary the pin on Yung at 11:54.

Rating: D+. This was a run of the mill six woman tag, which isn’t what you expect from a match billed as the Dark War. I was having more problems telling who was who in the whole thing and that made for a pretty disappointing story. To be fair though, that was the case with the entire story as Allie going evil was a complete disappointment from almost every side.

Post match Rosemary puts Allie on a leash and drags her away, launching a thousand fanfics in the process.

Glenn Gilbertti is still trying to figure out what he’s doing and Konnan sends him to yell at Don Callis. A fight is teased but it’s Killer Kross instead. The lights go out and screaming ensues.

Back from a break with Gilbertti hearing Vince Russo’s voices and looking for Callis. He thinks he finds Cody and the Young Bucks but is mistaken again. Scott D’Amore says Callis is on commentary because that’s his job. Gilbertti is NOT wanted for commentary but comes to the desk anyway.

Josh Matthews brings out Scarlett Bordeaux for her first match, though I’m not sure if the full body suit and heels are the best attire. The talent search made sense because those people were all falling over themselves so they weren’t going to be a success in the ring. Gilbertti was the biggest disaster though, which draws him into the ring for some yelling. Gilbertti: “You know what’s going to happen if you wrestle. You’re going to suck.” She slaps him in the face and a challenge is thrown out. Gilbertti tells her to spend a week cooking, but Scarlett promises to make him her b**** next week.

Rosemary tells Kiera and Jordynne to leave because she’ll take care of Allie from here. Kiera isn’t happy but Jordynne says she’s good now.

Tessa Blanchard is in a #1 contenders match next week and is willing to beat Grace if she has to. It’s all just punishment for taking out Gail Kim.

Rascalz vs. Lucha Bros

Non-title with Dezmond Xavier and Zachary Wentz for the Rascalz. Xavier and Fenix start things off and they circle each other for the first minute. A kick to the ribs has Fenix in some short lived trouble but the Bros start firing off the kicks, including a superkick to Wentz on the floor. Back in and the Codebreaker/top rope double stomp to the back combination sets up the wheelbarrow splash for two on Xavier.

Some right hands and elbows get Xavier out of trouble long enough for a tag off to Wentz and a handspring knee to the head hits Pentagon. Back up and Pentagon kicks Wentz’s leg out on the ropes but Xavier is right there with the big flip dive (launched by Wentz to make it even better) onto both Bros. Wentz’s Swanton into the Final Flash from Xavier gets two on Pentagon, leaving Fenix and Xavier to slug it out again. Pentagon is back up though and it’s a superkick into the Pentagon Driver to finish Wentz at 7:48.

Rating: B-. I could have gone for more of this and that’s a good way to end a show. The big thing here was the Rascalz hanging with the champs and looking good in a match they weren’t going to win. The Lucha Bros are going to have another match with LAX and then Rob Van Dam and Sabu (because reasons) so there wasn’t any doubt here. It was still fun while it lasted though as the Rascalz have become some of my favorites around here in a hurry.

The Bros go to the back where they run into Konnan. They ask him (in Spanish with subtitles and then English because wrestling reasons) to tell LAX not to mess with their masks because that’s not what men do. Konnan tries to calm things down and says LAX wants a rematch. That’s not happening because it’s too soon (fair) but Konnan says he’s not asking. Next time he sees the champs, they better have a date.

Overall Rating: C+. It was a good show overall with some nice wrestling including a strong main event, but there was no way around that Dark War being such a terrible result. You call it a war and don’t even have it hardcore? The storytelling worked well in spots and that’s where Impact does best. Nice show here as they keep moving forward in the right direction.

Results

Rich Swann b. Ethan Page – Phoenix splash

Ace Austin b. Jake Atlas – The Fold

Rosemary/Jordynne Grace/Kiera Hogan b. Su Yung/Undead Maid of Honor/Allie – Spear to Yung

Lucha Bros b. Rascalz – Pentagon Driver to Wentz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Ring of Honor
Date: March 6, 2019
Location: RP Funding Center, Lakeland, Florida
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Colt Cabana

Believe it or not, things have gotten very interesting in a hurry around here with a bunch of different things going on, most of which revolve around Jay Lethal and the World Title. Last week saw Lifeblood pick up a big win over Lethal’s collected team, meaning we’re probably coming up on something between Lifeblood and the unofficially named Plague. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

TV Champion Jeff Cobb is ready to defend against Silas Young. He’ll even give Young a Tour of the Islands.

TV Title: Silas Young vs. Jeff Cobb

Young is challenging and it’s certainly getting straight to the point. Cobb drives him into the corner for an early power display before taking him down amateur style. Young is smart enough to get to the ropes and we take an early break. Back with the two of them shaking hands with Young talking about a handshake. Of course that means a shot to the throat as Cobb is in trouble for the first time.

Cobb shoves him away without much effort and hits a standing moonsault for two. They head outside with Cobb being sent into the barricade, which is about all that seems to work on him. Back in and some shoulders to the ribs keep Cobb in trouble with a missed dropkick making things even worse. Cobb gets low bridged to the apron for a springboard clothesline as it’s all Young at the moment.

We take another break and come back with Cobb fighting out of a chinlock as ROH follows the WWE’s playbook. Young makes the mistake of talking trash though as Cobb comes back with forearms to the head. The backbreaker/clothesline cuts Cobb off for two and the hanging swinging suplex gets the same. That’s enough for Cobb to get fired up with shoulders in the corner and Young is rocked. Cobb’s swinging belly to back suplex drops Young and rolling German suplexes make things even worse. Young is done and the Tour of the Islands retains the title at 17:41.

Rating: B. They’ve got something with Cobb, as he’s kind of the ROH version of Brock Lesnar with a little less aggression and more of a laid back attitude. Young gave Cobb everything he could but got overwhelmed in the end because Cobb is just that good. It was a good story and Cobb looks even better than usual, making this a nice step forward for him and the title reign.

We look at a clip of the Briscoes and Villain Enterprises getting in a fight at a show in Texas, setting up a Tag Team Title match at the 17^th Anniversary Show.

Matt Taven rants about Jay Lethal being a fake World Champion. Tonight, he’s issuing an open challenge for his own World Title.

We look at Shane Taylor attacking Cobb, earning himself a title shot at the Anniversary Show.

We look at Mayu Iwatani winning the Women’s Title from Kelly Klein. Rematch, Anniversary Show.

Vinny Marseglia vs. Rush

Fallout from the Kingdom attacking Rush recently. It’s a brawl to start with Rush kneeing him in the face and flipping over Marseglia for a splash in the corner. Marseglia takes him down and hammers away before taking things outside as we go to a break. Back with Rush being sent into the barricade a few times, followed by the removal of the floor mats. A suplex on the floor doesn’t work so they head inside with the suplex working just fine in there.

Rush is right back up with a kick to the ribs and they go outside again with Marseglia being sent into the barricade this time. A chair is teased but the referee actually does his job for once and breaks it up. Back in and Rush kicks him in the face before hitting the Tranquilo pose. Marseglia is right back with a double underhook backbreaker for two but Rush suplexes him into the corner. That means a hard running dropkick to the face and Marseglia is done at 10:53.

Rating: C+. This was all it needed to be with Rush looking like a star who can beat up an established name. I’m liking him more and more every time I see him either here or elsewhere and that’s a great sign. He comes off as a big deal and if they keep pushing him, they could have something special on their hands.

We look back at Kenny King stealing a pin from Marty Scurll in Miami. They meet at the Anniversary Show.

Here’s Matt Taven with the Kingdom for an open challenge for his title. Before the challenger comes out, Taven goes on a rant about how Lethal is cosplaying as him and bragging about holding the World Title. This is an open challenge to anyone but Jay Lethal.

Fake World Title: Matt Taven vs. Jonathan Gresham

Taven is defending and the Kingdom is ejected. The beatdown is on early on with Gresham in trouble until he crushes Taven’s finger between his feet. A running knee to the elbow sets up an Octopus Hold but here’s the Kingdom for the DQ at 1:31. I mean, they don’t do anything before the bell rings, which is rather prejudiced of the referee.

Post match the beatdown is on until Lethal comes in for the save. The numbers get the better of him as well and it’s table time, only to have Lifeblood run in for the real save. The Kingdom leaves and Mark Haskins finds the fake World Title. Haskins hands it to Lethal and the ax and baseball bat have been forgotten as well. Lethal uses said bat and ax to destroy the title as Taven swears revenge. Good segment, as long as it doesn’t get replaced by the real title.

Overall Rating: B. Another good show here as they’ve been avoiding the less interesting talent and stories. If you do that long enough, those stories go away and the good stuff becomes the norm. They’re on a roll right now and that’s a good time to have with less than a month away from the biggest show in the company’s history. Now keep it up after that, which is the hard part.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania VII
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

In addition to the double main event, we have a match that is going to change wrestling going forward but no one knew it yet. This is a time of change for the company but it was still a very dark period at the moment. We’ll see a lot of the changes on this show, many of which will be better than others. Let’s get to it.

Unfortunately Jesse Ventura is gone from the company. Heenan is great but you can’t replace Jesse and Gorilla.

The opening video is just a quick look at Hogan vs. Slaughter.

Willie Nelson, complete with a replica WWF World Title belt, sings America the Beautiful.

Gorilla brings out Jim Duggan to do commentary on the first match. You know Duggan is happy to be on a show with a theme of Stars and Stripes.

The Rockers are ready for the opening match and aren’t worried about Bobby Heenan at ringside.

Rockers vs. Barbarian/Haku

So much for Heenan finding new members of the Family. Barbarian now has fur trunks, a fur cape and antlers, only one of which he wears during the match. I’ll let you figure out which of them that is. Shawn and Haku get things going with Shawn’s speed not working very well to start. Instead it’s a flying shoulder for two on Haku in a rare display of power from Shawn. Marty comes in to try some tandem offense but Barbarian runs them over with a double clothesline.

The Rockers come back with some dropkicks though and Heenan takes a break for a meeting. Back in and Barbarian uses the power to take over on Marty but Shawn helps his partner with a hurricanrana to take over. They try the same thing on Haku but this time the referee holds Shawn out, allowing Barbarian to come in and snap Marty’s throat across the top.

After another quick beating, Marty gets in a quick cross body for a breather. Barbarian breaks up the tag attempt though and it’s time for the bearhug. Marty fights out but dives off the middle rope and right into an awesome powerslam. He’s still able to roll away from a top rope headbutt though and there’s the tag to Shawn. Everything breaks down and a Marty missile dropkick sets up a Shawn high cross body to put Haku away at 10:33.

Rating: B. This is a perfect opening match as they were in and out of there fast enough but got in almost everything that they needed to do. The Rockers were awesome at this point and Haku/Barbarian were great foils for them with the power vs. speed dynamic. It holds up well and is still one of the better opening matches, especially considering it really doesn’t mean anything but still got the crowd fired up.

It’s already celebrity time as Gene is backstage with Regis Philbin, Alex Trebek and Marla Maples (Donald Trump’s girlfriend at the time). Regis talks about meeting some wrestlers for his talk show and he likes being a guest for a change. Earthquake scares him though. Gene: “Regis, you’re beautiful.” Marla doesn’t have anything of note to say and Alex makes the Jeopardy jokes you would expect him to make.

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Tornado, also known as Kerry Von Erich, is a huge star from Dallas who had more drug problems than should be humanly possible. He’s reaching the end of his very short shelf life already so this isn’t likely to work well. Bravo clotheslines Tornado to the floor before he can even get his robe off but Tornado comes back with a failed claw (his finishing hold) attempt. Tornado ducks some clotheslines but walks into the side suplex for two. A bad looking middle rope chop to the back has Tornado in more trouble but he catches Bravo in the claw, followed by the Tornado Punch (exactly what it sounds like) for the pin at 3:11.

Rating: D-. Not a good match here in the slightest with both guys looking sluggish and not really excited to be out there. This is another filler match, though these are starting to get fewer and further between, at least compared to a few years ago. In your depressing moment of the show, both of these two will be dead in less than two years.

Slick says his Warlord (now bald and without facepaint, making him look far more intimidating) is ready to fix the British Bulldog. The idea is that the Bulldog can’t escape the full nelson.

British Bulldog says he can powerslam the Warlord and his mascot Winston (a dog) says there’s no bull in this Bulldog. So Bulldog can speak canine. That’s quite the low level superpower.

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

This is the solo version of the Bulldog who is even bigger and stronger than he was before. Bulldog starts fast with some hard shoulders to send Warlord outside. Back in and Warlord drops backwards to break up the crucifix attempt as Heenan is already getting on Gorilla’s nerves.

We hit the required bearhug before Warlord opts to just pound Bulldog in the back with heavy forearms. A nice belly to belly nice dropkick to the chest (since when could he jump like that?) followed by a sunset flip for two. Warlord comes back with the full nelson but he can’t get the fingers locked. Just like Billy Jack Haynes four years ago, Bulldog breaks the incomplete hold, followed by a quick powerslam to pin Warlord at 8:11.

Rating: C-. Not terrible here as Warlord was fine as a dragon for Bulldog to slay. This is a good example of a match where they went step by step in a very basic idea but the execution was good enough to make what should have been a disaster into something totally watchable.

Jimmy Hart has his Nasty Boys (Brian Knobbs and Jerry Sags) ready to win the Tag Team Titles. The Nasty Boys were a hot act in WCW in late 1989 so of course the company didn’t bother to sign them to contracts and they were in the WWF in January.

The Hart Foundation say the Nasty Boys are already at the bottom and they’re going even lower.

Macaulay Culkin is here.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

The Harts are defending. Jimmy Hart is wearing a helmet for reasons that aren’t clear though it might be to protect himself from injury. Jerry and Bret start things off with Hart nailing a Thesz press and some right hands. So that’s where Austin learned it. It’s off to Knobbs vs. Neidhart with Jim going off with forearms to the chest in the corner. We hit the armbar for a bit before it’s off to Bret for right hands to Jerry’s head.

The Russian legsweep (not a neckbreaker Gorilla) sets up the middle rope elbow for two but Knobbs gets in a cheap shot from behind to take over. A hard whip sends Bret into the corner as the announcers debate the main event. Off to a reverse chinlock from Sags before Knobbs comes in for the same hold. Jerry comes in for another one as they’re switching in and out very quickly. Brian hooks his second version but Bret gets up and drops Knobbs onto his back for the break.

The referee doesn’t see the tag though and Bret’s punishment continues. Knobbs hits Sags by mistake though and NOW the tag counts. A quick powerslam gets two on Knobbs and everything breaks down. The Nasty Boys collide again and there’s the Hart Attack to Knobbs but Jimmy throws in the helmet, allowing Sags to knock cold, giving Knobbs the pin at 12:10.

Rating: C+. Simple idea here and a good way to get the titles on the Nasty Boys. They may not have been as polished as the Harts but they’re entertaining brawlers who can put on a good enough match to validate holding the titles. This was it for the Harts as they would amicably split (a rare thing in wrestling) and Bret would be in the singles ranks by the end of the summer.

We recap Rick Martel vs. Jake Roberts. Last year, Martel had sprayed the snake bag with cologne but hit Jake in the eye as well, blinding him for several months. Jake was still blind until the new year but he kept going after Martel. Tonight it’s a blindfold match with both guys wrestling under a hood.

Jake says a man has five senses but a snake has six: they always do it better in the dark. That’s a sense?

Rick Martel vs. Jake Roberts

As the hoods are being put on, Jake sticks his hand underneath his, allowing us to clearly see the hole allowing them to see. So much for the gimmick working here. They can’t find each other for the first minute but Martel trips over Jake. Some stuff on the mat goes nowhere so Martel loads up a backdrop, only to have Jake step to the side. There’s your proof that they can see in case the big hole in the hood wasn’t enough for you.

More “blind” searching ensues and they miss charges. Martel finds him for a slam but misses an elbow drop. We’re almost four minutes into this and there’s been about fifteen seconds of contact. The referee gets cornered in the corner but Martel realizes he’s got a shirt in his hands. Jake starts clapping his hands to get Martel’s attention before circling around to catch him. This gives us another ten seconds of contact as the fans want a DDT. I’d settle for a right hand at this point.

Martel finds the snake bag and backs away right into Jake….who still can’t get his hands on him. The bored Gorilla and Heenan do a not very funny bit where Heenan keeps repeating him until a shoulder knocks Jake to the floor. Heenan: “Excuse me for a second. MARTEL! HE’S ON THE FLOOR!” Rick gets a chair but hits the post by mistake while Jake is sitting in the ring. Roberts pulls him back in but Martel hits a quick backbreaker to set up the Boston crab. That goes nowhere so Jake grabs him for the DDT and the pin at 8:33.

Rating: F-. This is one of the worst matches in wrestling history, let alone just Wrestlemania. They stumbled around for eight minutes and had less than a minute of “action” in the whole thing. Martel never even cheated. There’s a dozen ways to make this work for a heel but they just did it straight (well as straight as you can do when you see Jake’s hand inside the match at the start) and wasted everyone’s time. Awful “match”.

Post match Jake destroys the cologne atomizer and puts Damien on Rick.

Maples is in Jimmy Hart’s team’s locker room for the Nasty Boys’ celebration. Calamity ensues so she throws it back to Gene, meaning Gorilla.

Jimmy Snuka vs. Undertaker

Here we go. Undertaker is completely different than anything else in the company at this point and probably ever as he plays the character perfectly, walking stoically to the ring while Paul Bearer has this disturbing look on his face. Snuka, now with a mustache and goatee, turns his back on Undertaker and gets beaten down, followed by Undertaker just ripping at his face. Jimmy goes to the apron but gets suplexed back inside. The fans are openly cheering for Undertaker here as Snuka’s offense has almost no effect. The tombstone makes Snuka victim #1 at 4:19.

Rating: D. The match was nothing to see and no one had any idea of what this would lead to. Undertaker was clearly a star from the second he walked through the curtain last year at Survivor Series though and he’s still going twenty five years later. Snuka was the designated victim here, which is the role he had been playing for years.

Notice what Heenan said when Undertaker won: “THAT’S JIMMY SUPERFLY SNUKA!” Yes, the same Snuka who has been living on his reputation for years now. That’s one of the most valuable things you can have on a roster. Snuka never has to win another match and his reputation makes beating him mean something. It’s job security for Snuka and a great way to put over someone young and new. Bad match, good booking.

We recap Savage vs. Warrior, which started over the WWF World Title and is now career vs. career.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Before we get going, Heenan spots Elizabeth in the crowd. I’m sure that’s just a coincidence. Bobby is drooling over Queen Sherri and Savage looks fired up. Warrior actually walks to the ring to really sell how serious this is for everyone. Warrior’s trunks have a picture of the WWF World Title on the back with the words “means more than this” wrapped around it. That’s a nice touch.

Savage gets thrown around to start and it’s time to chill on the floor for a second. Back in and Warrior lifts him up by the throat but he’s still keeping things slow paced. Sherri’s attempt at interference fails and Savage gets tied up in the ropes to continue the beating. Savage finally gets in some offense with a running clothesline as Gorilla compares their careers.

Warrior catches a high cross body in midair but just sets Savage down and slaps him in the face. With nothing else working, Savage throws in a chair but even that doesn’t work as Warrior throws him down again. More stomping has Savage in trouble as we cut to a concerned Elizabeth in the crowd. They’re still in first or second gear and this has been almost all Warrior so far. Savage finally gets smart by avoiding a charge in the corner, sending Warrior crashing down to the floor.

Sherri rakes his back so Warrior casually shoves her down but Savage sends him into the post. A backslide gets two for Savage and he freaks out even more than usual. Warrior runs the ropes and tries a flying shoulder…..while Savage is down on his hands and knees. He deserves to crash and burn as well as the sleeper from Randy. Back up and it’s a double clothesline. This has been a chess match so far and the fans are staying with them every second to make the atmosphere even better.

Sherri’s distraction keeps the referee from seeing a small package and Savage kicks out. Warrior’s shoulder hits the referee by mistake but Sherri comes off the top with a shoe to Savage’s face by mistake. Savage guillotines him across the top rope and drops the top rope elbow. That’s not enough as he goes up top for another one. Savage isn’t done yet as he drops THREE MORE ELBOWS….for two.

Warrior fights up again and hits three straight clotheslines followed by the gorilla press and splash…..for two. Warrior starts talking to his hands and asking if this is his destiny. Savage decks him from behind but his top rope ax handle sends him crashing into the barricade. Randy is out of it so Warrior (“NOW I KNOW!”) throws him back inside for a flying shoulder block, sending him out to the floor again. He does it two more times and Savage is DONE, allowing Warrior to put his foot on the chest for the pin at 20:50.

Rating: A. This was a war and Warrior’s best match by a thousand miles. The crowd hung with them every step of the way here and the drama was amazing. It’s a rare case where words don’t do a match justice and you just need to see it for yourselves. The action is great but it’s the atmosphere that carries the whole thing. This is more than worth seeing if you haven’t caught it before.

Post match Warrior leaves and Sherri explodes on Savage, blaming him for the loss and kicking him when he’s down. Elizabeth jumps the barricade and throws Sherri to the floor as Savage gets up. Savage gets up and turns around…..and is stunned. The referee tells Savage that Sherri was the one beating on him and he has no idea what to do.

Elizabeth opens her arms and Savage hugs her, finally reuniting with his true love who still loved him after he lost everything he had. Savage puts her on his shoulder like he would do in the old days as we see fans crying everywhere. Elizabeth holds the ropes open but he says not this time and holds them open for her for the first time ever, showing that he’s a changed man.

Savage takes one last bow before leaving with the only thing that matters to him. This is one of the most perfect moments to cap off one of the best long term stories the company has ever put together. Also of note: this wasn’t his full on face turn. Savage would do commentary for a few months and was still a heel for a long stretch.

It’s intermission so let’s go to……a debate on instant replay? This is a reference to the NFL debating the issue recently and I have no idea why this is here. Vince moderates the discussion between George Steinbrenner (New York Yankees owner) and Paul Maguire (NFL analyst) over Randy Savage interfering at the Royal Rumble.

Steinbrenner wants the referees fired if they take too much time to make a call and Maguire wants the guys to wrestle. Maguire insults Steinbrenner under his breath and we go to the replay to see if he really did it. The referee are the Bushwhackers (who else?) but they say it’s inconclusive and therefore the play stands. This really, really wasn’t funny and Heenan’s face in his hands sums up the whole thing.

After that, we have a five minute intermission, meaning we just sit around waiting for five minutes. Well it’s better than lame “comedy”.

Gorilla and Heenan preview the rest of the show.

Undertaker measures Regis for a coffin. Regis: “We’re dying out here.”

Demolition, now just Smash and Crush (replacement for Ax) and heels, tells Alex Trebek that only Mr. Fuji (their manager again) has all the answers.

Regis is with Genichiro Tenryu and Koji Kitao, who don’t speak English. He tries Toyota but they think he’s Kathy Lee Gifford.

Jake and Damien freak Trebek out. Damien will have to settle for the home version of Jeopardy. Heenan takes credit for setting the whole thing up.

Demolition vs. Tenryu/Kitao

This is part of a cross promotional deal with Tenryu’s SWS promotion. It’s a brawl to start with Smash and Crush pounding Kitao down to start. Crush drops a top rope ax handle to the ribs as the crowd really isn’t into this as they have no idea who the newcomers are. Heenan thinks Kitao’s first name is Fred as he clotheslines Smash down and makes the tag to Tenryu. Smash rolls away from a backwards top rope elbow and everything breaks down. Kitao breaks up the Decapitator and Tenryu powerbombs Smash for the pin at 4:16.

Rating: D-. The crowd was silent here and it’s really not had to see why. Demolition was WAY past their expiration date and this would be their last match as a team before it was off to the singles ranks. This didn’t work as a match though and the Japanese guys would be gone right after this, never to be seen again save for some one off Royal Rumble appearances for Tenryu.

Heenan leaves to manage Mr. Perfect in the next match and will be replaced by Lord Alfred Hayes.

Big Boss Man is ready to take the Intercontinental Title to complete his revenge on Heenan for insulting Boss Man’s mama. Can you blame him for being mad in that case? Boss Man has run through the entire Heenan Family and only Perfect is left. Again: simple, yet effective. Side note: it really is amazing to see how much weight Boss Man has lost in the last two years. He’s probably down 100lbs.

Heenan and Perfect call Boss Man Barney Fife and reference the Rodney King beatings, which had taken place just three weeks earlier.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Big Boss Man

Boss Man is challenging and knocks Perfect over the top rope with a single right hand. Back in and he swings Perfect around BY THE HAIR. Freaking ow man! Perfect avoids a charge in the corner but gets whipped so hard that he flips forward in a crash. Boss Man whips him with a belt (the referee is fine with this of course) but Perfect wraps the belt around his fist for a shot to the ribs.

We hit an abdominal stretch on the challenger and Heenan tells the timekeeper to ring the bell. The PerfectPlex is countered into a small package for two but a reverse Hennig neck snap (kind of a running Blockbuster) gets two. Perfect is nice enough to go up top for the dive into the raised boot that was clearly designed as a way for him to dive into a raised boot.

Boss Man crotches him against the post but Perfect whips him hard into the steps to take over again. Heenan gets in some cheap shots….and here’s Andre, who is moving better than he has in years. In the distraction, Perfect takes the turnbuckle pad off but Andre hits him in the head with the title belt. Boss Man makes a slow cover but here are Barbarian and Haku for the DQ at 10:14.

Rating: C+. To this day I have no idea why they didn’t change the title here. Boss Man running through the Heenan Family and winning the title should have written itself but they went with the DQ finish instead for some reason. Andre wouldn’t be back after this but it was nice to see him get to do something fun one last time.

Andre helps Boss Man clean house. Boss Man grabs Andre’s shoulders from behind and Andre looks like he wants to kill him.

Donald Trump, Chuck Norris, Lou Ferrigno (the reason Hulk Hogan got his name. They were on a talk show once and Hogan was said to be bigger than the actor who played the Incredible Hulk) and Henry Winkler (who once played a wrestler) are all here. Fonzie just made the show.

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Valentine did a really quick face turn to set this up, despite no one really wanting to see it in the first place. A quick powerslam puts Hammer down but he comes back with some chops in the corner. Heenan, back on commentary, is wondering how Andre could have been here. An elbow to the head staggers Earthquake and a middle rope chop actually puts him down. The Figure Four doesn’t work and it’s the Earthquake Splash for the pin at 3:17.

Rating: D. This is another match that could have been cut out to get the time down a little bit. Valentine is an old standard at Wrestlemania but that doesn’t mean he needs to be getting a match this late in the show in 1991. Earthquake has fallen down the card a bit but he’s still fine for a midcard act.

The Legion of Doom (I’m going to assume you’ve heard of them) blames Power and Glory for their lack of Tag Team Titles. After tonight, they’re going to be sour and gory.

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Power and Glory is Hercules and Paul Roma. Hawk clotheslines them down to start and Roma dives into a powerslam. The Doomsday Device puts Roma away in 59 seconds. Well that worked.

We recap Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase. Virgil FINALLY had enough of DiBiase treating him like garbage at the Royal Rumble. Roddy Piper, recently injured in a motorcycle accident, has been mentoring and coaching Virgil for the match.

Ted DiBiase vs. Virgil

Virgil dances around like a boxer to start and punches DiBiase to the floor. Back in and a clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor again but Virgil sends him back inside. They get in again and Virgil takes him to the mat as this is still in first gear. Gorilla and Heenan talk about this being the largest pay per view audience in history (right) as DiBiase chops away in the corner. A piledriver gets two for Ted and a pair of suplexes gets the same. DiBiase remembers that he used to be really evil and shoves Piper down but Piper uses the crutch to low bridge him to the floor to give Virgil a countout win at 7:37.

Rating: D+. This was more of a feel good moment than anything else but it fell really flat with the countout (DiBiase’s third match in a row to end in a countout) instead of DiBiase getting rolled up for a pin. Virgil would pretty much max out here as after this he didn’t have any character and just kind of floated around.

DiBiase beats Virgil down post match and Queen Sherri runs in to become Ted’s new manager. They do a number on Piper’s bad knee but Virgil gets the crutch to make the save. Virgil tells Piper to be a man and get up, just like Piper told him to do multiple times. It’s more bad execution of a good idea.

We look at Sgt. Slaughter and his boss General Adnan (longtime heel manager Sheik Adnan Al-Kaissie) burning a Hogan shirt.

Slaughter and Adnan say Hogan is playing by their rules. We look at Slaughter beating up Hogan and Jim Duggan with a chair as part of these new rules. He might just get himself counted out or disqualified to keep the title. They’ve been teasing this idea all night.

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Mountie is an evil Canadian mounted policeman played by Jacques Rougeau and managed by Jimmy Hart. Tito scores with an early atomic drop and a right hand but a Jimmy distraction lets Mountie get in his shock stick to Tito’s ribs for the pin at 1:20. Nothing but filler. Gorilla: “That will go in the record books as a victory for the Mountie but not for anyone who viewed it.”

Hogan says he has secret weapons to deal with Slaughter’s ground warfare. He isn’t pleased with Slaughter for beating him down and putting him in the camel clutch. Hogan isn’t the same man he was just a week ago but he’s doing it for AMERICA tonight.

Trebek is guest ring announcer, Maples is guest timekeeper and Regis is on commentary.

WWF World Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan is challenging and naturally comes out with the American flag. The champ stalls to start and is content to do so for the first minute and a half. A lockup takes them into the corner and neither can get an advantage. Hulk eventually shoves him down before grabbing a headlock. A shoulder sends Slaughter into the ropes for some of his great selling.

Adnan offers a distraction so Slaughter hits Hogan in the back with a chair for an attempt at a DQ. The referee is fine with the chair but Hogan doesn’t sell it anyway. Slaughter’s thumb to the eye works a bit better but he misses an elbow drop. A forearm to the head gets two for Hulk (how rare is it for him to get a near fall?) and he sends Slaughter chest first into the buckle. Hulk slingshots him into the post and it’s time for some right hands in the corner. This has been almost all Hogan so far.

Hogan actually goes to the middle rope but Slaughter punches him out of the air. That goes nowhere either so Hogan goes all the way to the top (!), only to get slammed right back down. Another chair shot is ignored by the referee so Slaughter chokes with a camera cable. Back in and Slaughter starts in on the back to set up the camel clutch.

First up though is a Boston crab but Hogan is all of three inches away from the ropes. A top rope stomp to the back (that looked dangerous) looks to pin Hogan but Adnan is on the apron for absolutely no logical reason. Try domestic help next time Sarge. There’s a chair to the head and Hulk is busted open, a rare thing at this point. The camel clutch goes on but Slaughter would rather cover him with the Iraqi flag. Of course you know this means war and it’s Hulk Up time. The legdrop gives Hulk the title back at 20:23, making him the first three time WWF World Champion.

Rating: C+. Aside from being the most obvious ending in the world, this was a fine Wrestlemania main event. Hogan winning made sense, even if the Gulf War had been over for about a month at this point. Slaughter was fine for a one off title reign as the turncoat worked well enough. Not a classic or anything but it did exactly what it was supposed to do.

A lot of posing and flag waving take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. If you cut out about forty five minutes of filler, this becomes a minor classic. The wrestling is actually quite good here with a fun opener, good title matches and a classic in the middle. There’s still too much filler though and it really drags down what is still a fun show. It also has a much more feel good tone to it and the show felt a lot lighter than the previous years. The wrestling helps carry this one and it’s actually a hidden semi-gem.

Ratings Comparison

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D-

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C-

Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

Original: C-

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C+

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Original: F

2013 Redo: F

2015 Redo: F-

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: A

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

Original: W (For What were they thinking)

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D-

Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: F+

2015 Redo: D

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C

2013 Redo: B-

Overall Rating: B-

I’ve always had a soft spot for this show.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/14/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-7-wrestlemania-goes-patriotic/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/16/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-vii-no-that-isnt-a-tear-in-my-eye/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania VII
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Memorial Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Gorilla Monsoon

Oh boy has a lot of stuff changed here. First of all, Jesse is gone from the company and is being replaced by a revolving door of replacements. Other than that we’ve got Sgt. Slaughter as an anti-American world champion who needs a REAL AMERICAN to save the title for the country. There’s also a retirement match here between Randy Savage and Ultimate Warrior, which might actually be better than Warrior’s title win last year. Oh and there’s this big guy in black that is making his Wrestlemania debut tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Hogan saving AMERICA, which is what the entire show is about. I believe the subtitle of this show is Stars and Stripes Forever, so if you can’t figure out what the ending is going to be, I can’t help you. Keep in mind that this was inspired by the Gulf War….which was already over but who cares about technicalities like that?

Willie Nelson sings America the Beautiful.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan is dressed like a drunk Uncle Sam and comes out for commentary for the opening match since Heenan is managing. He gives his thoughts on the main matches too.

The Rockers say they’ll beat the Heenan Family.

Haku/Barbarian vs. Rockers

Shawn and Haku get us going with Michaels trying to speed things up, only to be slammed into the corner. The second attempt at flying around works a bit better as a dropkick puts Haku down. The Rockers do some of their double teaming stuff but Barbie takes them down with a big double clothesline. Shawn and Marty double superkick him down though and the Heenan Family has to regroup a bit.

We get down to Marty vs. Barbarian again and speed takes over one more time. A sunset flip doesn’t work for Jannetty but Barbarian punches the mat. A rana takes Barbarian down and Marty pounds away for two. Off to Haku and a double headbutt puts Marty down again. Jannetty loads up another rana but the foreigners hit a double hot shot onto the top rope to really take over this time.

A gorilla press plants Jannetty and it’s time for more heel double teaming. Marty comes back with something like a cross body for two but the speed continues to get beaten down. By speed I mean the drug of the day for Jannetty of course. Back to Barbarian for a bearhug followed by a powerslam so wicked that the fans pop for it. The falling headbutt misses though and it’s hot tag time to Shawn. Things really do speed up now but Shawn gets kicked in the face to slow him down. That goes nowhere for the villains though and it’s a Michaels cross body off the top for the pin on Haku.

Rating: B. Just a fast paced tag team match here with power vs. speed. This is one of those formulas that works no matter how many times you do it as long as you have talented guys in there. The future Faces of Fear were fine as monsters for the Rockers to conquer and it set a good pace for the show here. Solid opening match.

Gene is with Marla Maples (not really famous), Alex Trebek and Regis Philbin, our celebrities for tonight. Regis is scared of Earthquake, Trebek tries to make Jeopardy jokes, and Marla is still not famous. Apparently she was married to Donald Trump. Ok then.

Dino Bravo vs. Texas Tornado

Von Erich popped into the company around Summerslam, won the IC Title from Perfect, lost it and was immediately a jobber to the stars until he went back to Texas. It’s a fast brawl to start but Bravo avoids the claw. Heenan is on commentary now. Von Erich runs into a boot in the corner and Dino takes over for a bit. The side suplex puts Tornado down for two and that’s about it for Bravo. A few seconds later it’s Claw and Tornado Punch for the pin on Bravo.

Rating: D. Nothing at all to see here and it’s a match that easily could have been cut. This was Bravo’s last televised match before he left the company for good a year or so later. Afterwords he would soon be murdered in an illegal cigarette smuggling operation in Canada. Now there’s a story that you can’t make up.

Warlord and Slick are ready for Davey Boy.

Bulldog talks to Winston (his new dog) and says there’s no bull in this bulldog.

Davey Boy Smith vs. Warlord

This is about whether or not Davey can break the full nelson. We start with our standard power stuff as they ram into each other a few times, only to have Bulldog knock Warlord out to the floor. A crucifix doesn’t work for Bulldog so Warlord drops some elbows for no cover. We hit the bearhug but Bulldog punches out, only to get caught in a hot shot to keep him on the mat.

A BIG belly to belly (kind of) puts Bulldog down but again Warlord won’t cover. We hit the chinlock until Bulldog fights up and hits a dropkick to send Warlord into the corner. Punches in said corner can’t drop Warlord but a cross body is finally enough to get him off his feet. Warlord counters a piledriver but Bulldog counters the counter into a sunset flip for two. Bulldog misses a charge into the corner and Warlord hooks the full nelson. It looks like all hope is lost but the fingers aren’t locked. Bulldog finally flips out of it and hooks the powerslam out of nowhere for the win.

Rating: C+. This would be filed under the category of “shocking the world” as it was actually a pretty solid match. Bulldog would get a lot better all of a sudden while Warlord would fall further down the card than he already was. This was way better than I was expecting and it turned into a pretty decent power match.

Jimmy Hart and hits Nasty Boys are ready to take the tag titles from the Harts.

The Harts say good luck cracking the Foundation.

Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

The Nastys got got hot in WCW in 1990, weren’t signed to contracts, and debuted in the WWF in late 1990/early 1991. They won a tag team battle royal for this shot they’re getting here. Jerry and Bret start things off and it’s a quick Thesz Press to take Sags down. Brian gets knocked off the apron by the Hitman and Sags gets tripped down to the mat. No Sharpshooter yet though as Bret stomps the midsection instead.

Off to Anvil who starts powering Knobs around and pounds away in the corner. After being knocked to the floor, Brian comes right back in and is immediately caught in an armbar. The Nastys double team Neidhart in their corner to FINALLY take over, but a mat slam is enough to let Neidhart tag Bret back in. Hart tries to fight off both of the Boys, only to get decked from behind by Knobs.

Bret is sent out to the floor where he may have hurt his knee. Back inside Jerry whips him into the corner as we hit the heat section of the match. Sags hooks a reverse chinlock before Knobs comes in to do exactly the same. Back to Jerry for a neckbreaker for two and Brian breaks up a hot tag attempt. Hart breaks up a reverse chinlock by Knobs and now it’s Jerry to break up another hot tag.

Brian misses a splash in the corner and Bret makes the tag but, say it with me, the referee doesn’t see it. We get heel miscommunication and NOW we get a tag to Anvil. Jim cleans house and hits a quick powerslam for two on Knobs as everything breaks down. Jimmy Hart gets decked by Bret and there’s a Hart Attack for Knobs. The referee tries to get Bret out and Sags decks Bret with Jimmy’s helmet, giving the Nastys the titles.

Rating: B-. Another solid tag match here as the division was getting very hot all of a sudden. The Harts would quietly split up after this with Bret moving into the IC Title picture soon thereafter. The Nastys would hold the titles over the summer before dropping them to the monsters known as the LOD at Summerslam.

Jimmy Hart’s near panic attack over winning the belts is hilarious stuff.

We recap Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel. Back in October, Roberts and Martel were on the Brother Love Show where Martel tried to spray his cologne on Damien’s bag, only to hit Jake’s eyes by mistake. Jake was basically blind for a few months, leading to the following blindfold match. These have never been good in the history of wrestling and I don’t expect it to be here.

Jake says snakes always do it better in the dark.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

In short, they’re both in hoods and neither guy can see. So the match starts and both guys point across the ring while trying to find where the other is. Martel gets down on the mat and crawls around, only to give us some stupid comedy spots with both guys tripping over the other. Rick tries a backdrop but Jake runs off to the side, showing that he can clearly see if you’re thinking about this.

They miss each other in the corner a few times until Martel finally grabs him for a slam, only to miss an elbow drop. Martel gets the referee in the corner, only to realize he’s grabbing a shirt. Jake uses the crowd for help by pointing and listening to the crowd cheer as he points at Martel. This continues on for awhile until Martel nearly grabs the snake bag.

The announcers continue a running joke where they can’t hear each other which isn’t funny. Jake gets knocked to the floor so Martel follows. He grabs a chair and pokes around with it but only hits the post. Back in and Martel takes Jake down and hooks the Boston Crab, only to have it broken quickly. Roberts grabs the DDT a second later for the pin.

Rating: F. This wasn’t wrestling. It was a stupid idea with both guys wandering around and making no contact for about seven and a half minutes before both guys hit their finishers. Thankfully this feud was done after this as I don’t think the fans could stand any more of it. Oh and on top of that, Martel didn’t cheat once by looking under the mask. Nice heel work there.

The Nasty Boys celebrate in the back and disgust Marla Maples.

Jimmy Snuka vs. The Undertaker

For those of you reading this now, we’re currently at 20-0 and it all begins here. Taker slugs him around and rams Snuka head first into the corner a few times. The big jumping clothesline takes Snuka down and there’s a quick smother by Taker. Jimmy charges into a knee in the corner and gets slammed down, only for an elbow drop to miss. Snuka chops away but misses a dive and falls to the floor. The Tombstone ends this a few seconds later.

Rating: D+. The match is just a squash but it’s far more historic than anything else. Undertaker would go on to become the true Mr. Wrestlemania, never losing a single match in the entirety of his career there up to the point this is being written (2013). Snuka would fade from view soon after this.

We recap Savage vs. Warrior. Savage attacked then WWF Champion Ultimate Warrior on Saturday Night’s Main Event because he wanted a title match. Queen Sherri then got on her knees in front of Warrior at the Rumble, only to be turned down again. Savage cost Warrior the title later in the night, setting up a career ending match here tonight.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Before the match, Heenan spots Miss Elizabeth sitting in the crowd. Warrior only walks to the ring with a coat on instead of his usual sprint to the ring. His trunks have the WWF Title belt on the back with the words “Means much more than this”. The fans HATE Savage here while Warrior gets some great pops. They lock up to start with Warrior easily shoving Randy down a few times. A shoulder does nothing for Savage so he heads to the outside.

Back in and a clothesline puts Savage down and there’s an overhand choke. An atomic drop has Savage in trouble again and there’s a big atomic drop for good measure. Sherri tries to interfere and is immediately knocked to the outside again. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Warrior pounds away as this is completely one sided so far. Savage finally comes back with a clothesline but he dives off the top into a slam position, but Warrior puts him down on his feet with no slam. Now THAT is a mind game.

Macho King goes to the floor and grabs a chair which is nothing more than a distraction so that he can jump Warrior. That goes as well as anything else has for him so far with Warrior pounding away at Savage’s head. Warrior stomps away in the corner as Heenan says you couldn’t sneak a midget into the building. Savage falls out of the corner to avoid a charge, sending Warrior out to the floor. Sherri adds a slap to the face and there’s the top rope ax handle.

Warrior gets posted and Sherri gets in a few more shots for good measure. We’re told that this is the largest PPV audience in the history of pay per view. Since there’s no way to know that for months, I don’t think this is the case. Warrior absorbs some slams and pops up to stare Savage down. A Sherri distraction doesn’t work at all and Warrior runs the ropes, only to be slammed face first down into the mat for two.

We hit the chinlock/sleeper for a bit before a double clothesline puts both guys down. Sherri tries to interfere again but the referee is taken down in the process. AGAIN the Queen interferes but accidentally takes Savage out by mistake. Warrior goes after her but gets caught in a rollup for two. Heenan is panicking over this stuff. Savage clotheslines him down and hits the flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, which gets a two count in total. To say Savage is in shock is the understatement of the year.

Warrior starts shaking the ropes and hits the war path around the ring before clotheslining Savage half to death. The gorilla press and splash only get two and Warrior talks to his hands, asking if it’s time for him to step aside. With Warrior on the apron, Savage decks him down to the floor as the crowd continues to be on the edges of their seats.

Savage loads up the ax handle to the barricade but Warrior hits him coming down, sending Randy crashing into the barricade. Back in and Savage can barely stand so Warrior hits two tackles to send Savage out to the floor both times. A third hits and Savage is DONE. Warrior puts his foot on the chest to end Savage’s career.

Rating: A. After watching both this and Wrestlemania 6 in about three days, there is zero question as to which is the better match. This was a pair of titans colliding and one man clearly was better. That’s one of the formulas that never fails if worked even mostly right and they NAILED IT here. This is by far and away Warrior’s best match ever, but the best part is yet to come.

Post match Sherri gets in the ring and beats the tar out of Savage who is defenseless and can’t see who it is. Elizabeth shocks everyone by jumping the guardrail and throwing Sherri to the floor in the only time I can ever remember her getting physical. Savage gets up and is SHOCKED to see Liz, who hadn’t been seen in about a year. Liz says it was Sherri attacking Savage who has no idea what to do.

Liz holds out her arms and after a few moments, Savage hugs her to one of the biggest ovations you will ever hear. Savage puts Liz on his shoulder before the go to leave. As is their custom, Liz holds the ropes for him but Savage says not this time, and holds the ropes open for her. Savage gets to take a bow in the middle of the ring and the fans are thrilled. This is the only, repeat ONLY, moment in wrestling that legitimately brings a tear to my eye every time I watch it. I think that’s the case for a lot of fans.

Regis Philbin is measured for a coffin by Undertaker. Regis: “We’re dying out here.”

Demolition is with Alex Trebek who annoys them with stupid Jeopardy talk. It’s Smash and Crush at this point, managed by Mr. Fuji again.

Regis talks to Tenryu and Kitao who are here for one night only. They don’t speak English so we get some racially insensitive attempts at communication.

Jake Roberts and Damien torment Trebek a bit. This is why intermission getting cut out was a good idea.

Demolition vs. Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao

Now this is one of those out of nowhere matches. Demolition is on their very last toes of their very last legs here as they’ve even got Mr. Fuji again. Tenryu is a Japanese legend and Kitao is a big time sumo guy who became a pro and didn’t do much. Kitao and Crush start things off but everything breaks down quickly. Fuji whacks Kitao in the back and Demolition takes over again. Gorilla asks what it takes to become a grand champion of sumo. Brain: “Being able to eat 1100 bowls of rice in an hour with a single chopstick.”

Crush slams Kitao down and it’s off to Smash. Kitao finally comes out of the corner with a clothesline and it’s off to Tenryu. He speeds things up in a hurry but misses a top rope back elbow. Crush hits a backbreaker to put Tenryu down but Kitao breaks up the Decapitator. He breaks it up again and Tenryu hits a fast enziguri and powerbomb for the pin on Smash.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here and I have no idea what the point of this match was. It’s the final match for Demolition and on top of that, THIS is how you use Tenryu, a legitimate Japanese legend? The match was less than five minutes long and this is the only time I know of that Tenryu appeared for the company in a regular match for nearly two years. My guess would be this is part of the working agreement with Tenryu’s SWS.

Boss Man says Heenan and his Family has nowhere else to hide tonight.

Mr. Perfect and Heenan say about what you would expect them to say about Big Boss Man.

Intercontinental Title: Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Perfect is defending. This is an interesting yet simple idea for a story: Heenan had insulted Boss Man’s mama so Boss Man swore revenge. He went after the Heenan Family and beat every single one of them until there was only Perfect left. Tonight is the final showdown. They spit at each other to start and Perfect slaps Boss Man like a schmuck. Boss Man hits him once to knock Perfect out to the floor and there’s a spin around BY THE HAIR. FREAKING OW MAN!

Boss Man speeds around the corner and hits a big clothesline to take Hennig down. Perfect gets tossed out to the floor and Boss Man is standing tall. Back in and Boss Man hits the running crotch attack to Perfect’s back and whips him with a belt for good measure. Perfect finally avoids a shot and takes Boss Man down with some kicks to the ribs. Off to a chinlock with a knee in the back followed by an abdominal stretch. There’s the Hennig neck snap for two and Mr. goes up, only to jump into a boot.

Perfect gets to do his reverse crotching into the post but as they go to the floor, Boss Man is whipped into the steps to take him down again. Since it was a Heenan distraction that caused the whip into the steps, here’s Andre the Giant to counter the weasel. Andre picks up the belt and takes way too long to get to his position, from which he whacks Perfect in the head to knock him out cold. Boss Man covers but Haku and Barbarian run in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This wasn’t great and I have no idea why they didn’t change the title. The story set it up to be a title change, but I guess they were hoping for something else besides this. What that was I have no idea as Boss Man would never come close to the title again. The match was decent enough all things considered though.

Boss Man and Andre clean house post match.

Donald Trump, Chuck Norris, Lou Ferrigno and Henry Winkler are here. Yep, the Fonz showed up at Wrestlemania.

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Valentine turned face a few months ago and this is his big match for the forces of good. We’re 20 seconds in and Valentine is getting powerslammed down for two. A splash misses in the corner and Valentine gets him down to one knee. Quake breaks the Figure Four twice, hits a big elbow and drops the Earthquake for the pin.

Rating: F+. Earthquake was pretty much done as a singles guy at this point but I’m assuming he got some shots at Hogan on house shows over the summer. Other than that though this was a filler match that didn’t need to be on the card at all. Nothing to see here but at least Quake looked dominant.

The LOD says Power and Glory will be sour and gory after the match.

Power and Glory vs. Legion of Doom

Hercules is sent to the floor and it’s a Doomsday Device to end Roma in less than a minute. They were clearly coming for the belts very soon.

We recap Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase. Basically Virgil spent years serving DiBiase and FINALLY snapped on him at the Royal Rumble, setting up this match tonight. Roddy Piper is Virgil’s mentor here too.

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Virgil gets one of the three big pops of his entire career here, with the first being when he finally hit DiBiase with the belt. The other will be in less than ten minutes. Virgil pounds away to start and sends Ted out to the floor. Back in and Ted hits a clothesline but an elbow misses a second later. DiBiase, the wrestler, easily takes Virgil down and hits a suplex for two. Things are REALLY slow now compared to just a few moments before. We head to the floor for a bit with DiBiase shoving down Piper, who was on crutches at this point. DiBiase talks some trash so Piper pulls the top rope down but the distraction is enough for a countout.

Rating: D. This was all story but it really should have been Virgil pinning DiBiase, even on a rollup. These two would continue to feud with Virgil actually taking the Million Dollar Title at Summerslam 1991. The problem with Virgil was that after the DiBiase feud, there was nothing for him to do at all. The match was really dull and didn’t have the payoff it needed at the end.

DiBiase puts Virgil in the Million Dollar Dream post match but Piper hits him with the crutch to break it up. Queen Sherri comes out to help with a beatdown of Piper, as she is now managing DiBiase. Referees come out to break it up until Virgil makes the save. Virgil tells Piper to get up, as Piper had told him over the last few months.

We get a clip of Slaughter and General Adnan burning a Hogan t-shirt.

Slaughter threatens to get himself disqualified to keep the title. We get a clip of Slaughter beating up Hogan and Duggan as Slaughter laughs evily.

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Tito chases him around to start and beats him up a bit, only to get caught in the ribs with Mountie’s shock stick, ending this in less than 90 seconds.

Hogan gives his prematch interview, talking about how much he loves AMERICA and how he’s got new weapons. We get a clip of Slaughter and Adnan beating Hogan down but he promises to do it for his country.

Here are the celebrities: Regis is on commentary, Marla Maples is the timekeeper and Alex Trebek is ring announcer.

WWF World Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan immediately chases Slaughter around the ring until Adnan is put on the floor. Feeling out process to start with both guys going into the corner. Hulk hooks a headlock to no avail but sends Slaughter backwards with a shoulder block. The champ hits one of the weakest chair shots you’ll ever see to Hogan’s back and pokes Hulk in the eye to finally take over. Hogan comes back with a clothesline and decks Adnan for fun too. A backdrop puts Slaughter down and Hulk sends him into the post.

Hogan hits a jumping knee to the back to send Slaughter into the corner and a slingshot sends Slaughter into the buckle again. Hogan gets in his ten punches in the corner for two but goes to the middle rope of all places, but Adnan breaks it up. Slaughter gets slammed down and Hulk drops a bunch of elbows. Now Hogan goes up top (!) but gets slammed to the mat and clotheslined to the floor. A better but still lame chair shot puts Hogan down again and it’s time to work on the back.

A backbreaker gets two for the champion and he stomps away on Hulk’s back. There’s a Boston Crab but Hulk is right next to the rope, making this pretty worthless. Another backbreaker gets two and it’s a third chair shot, this time to the head, gets two more. Hulk is cut over the eye. There’s Slaughter’s Camel Clutch but Hulk fights up, only to be rammed into the corner to send him right back down. Slaughter puts an Iraqi flag on Hogan and you know what’s coming now. A Hulk Up, big boot and leg drop later and AMERICA REIGNS AGAIN!

Rating: C. At the end of the day, if you didn’t know what was going to happen here then you’re either very young or have no idea how wrestling works. On top of the story, it’s Hogan in a match against a big man. What else could you possibly expect? Hogan winning is the 100% right decision and the match certainly isn’t bad. Slaughter was clearly a short term champion and there’s nothing wrong with that either. Decent stuff here and a feel good moment to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Oddly enough, this wasn’t too bad. There’s some lame stuff but for the most part it’s very short with only Jake vs. Martel being both bad and longer than five minutes. Other than that you get a very fun opener, a masterpiece in the retirement match, a feel good main event and some other solid stuff. If you shave off about half an hour of this, which could easily be done by dropping about three matches, this show goes WAY up in value. Still though, it’s worth checking out if you haven’t seen it in a long time.

Ratings Comparison

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Original: B

Redo: B

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Original: F

Redo: D

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Original: F

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+

Redo: A

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

Original: W (For What were they thinking)

Redo: D+

Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-

Redo: C

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Original: N/A

Redo: F+

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: C-

Redo: D

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Original: C+

Redo: C

Overall Rating

Original: C

Redo: B-

These things need to be different already.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/14/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-7-wrestlemania-goes-patriotic/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania 7
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan
America The Beautiful: Willie Nelson

Now this was a most interesting show and one that I’ve always liked for some reason. The theme for this show was Stars and Stripes in light of the Gulf War. At the Royal Rumble, Sergeant Slaughter had won the WWF Title with the help of the Macho Man by beating the Ultimate Warrior.

Slaughter was an Iraqi sympathizer and therefore, the epitome of evil at the time. It was clear that a Real American would have to rise up to confront him and take the title back. Fortunately, the WWF had the realest of all Real Americans in Mr. Hulk Hogan.

Your other big match was the previously mentioned Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage. These two would meet on this show in a career ending match. There’s also Mr. Perfect vs. Big Bossman for the IC belt and the Nasty Boys vs. The Harts for the tag belts.

We see the Rockers talking about how the Rockers are going to beat their opponents which is about the same interview that they did for their entire time in the WWF. This is close to the end of the Rockers’ run which mainly is because you can really see the star in Shawn begging to be let out.

The Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Due to Heenan managing the heels, we get Hacksaw Jim Duggan on commentary. Duggan is dressed like Uncle Sam which works fine for him. After running down the two main matches for a bit it’s time to set started. Shawn vs. Haku opens us up here. It’s your basic power vs. speed match to start which means it’s solid all things considered.

Everyone is in maybe 90 seconds in though and we get to an interesting part: the Rockers hit a double superkick to both guys, and the heels are up in maybe 4 seconds. In other words, Sweet Chin Music did nothing at all. Was it a technique thing that made them better later on? I’ve never gotten that. Off to Barbarian vs. Marty now which sounds painfully bad.

Sunset flip doesn’t work for Marty but Barbarian punches mat instead. The Rockers were rather awesome at this point which is always cool to see. Now we get to the majority of the match as Marty plays….well Marty, taking a BIG beating from the monsters. It amazes me how these guys could have the same formula so often and make it work so many times (and yes I know the Expresses did it first).

We get the bearhug as Marty is reeling. Granted it might be that he’s stoned or drunk but we have no evidence thereof. Granted it’s Marty so him being sober would be most odd indeed. Did Barbarian ever not have steady work? Marty manages to get free but misses a second rope cross body and is caught in a SLICK powerslam to crush him for no cover.

Barbarian misses a top rope headbutt though and amazingly his Samoan head is actually hurt. It does the needed job though as here comes Shawn off the hot tag. Shawn manages to fight off both guys for far longer than you would expect him to. A thumb in the eye doesn’t get Haku anywhere as Shawn gets a sunset flip for two.

Everyone comes in again and the Rockers wake up with double teams all around. They unleash the high stuff (remember it’s Marty out there) and a cross body from Shawn gets the win. Very fun match here and it worked rather well. Duggan leaves since Heenan is going to take over on commentary now.

Rating: B. This was the perfect opener. There’s not much of importance here and that works well. You don’t want your fans to get emotionally invested in the first match and get them worn out in the early going. This match was fun, fast paced, and not too serious. Perfect choice for the opener. On a side note, this makes Shawn 1-2 at WM.

We see Alex Trebek, Regis Philbin and some ugly woman who are the celebrities for WM 7. Seriously, Alex Trebek? Regis I can understand, but this is the best you can do, in Los Angeles? That can’t be a good thing. They really have nothing to say of note.

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

This should be interesting. Power vs. power here so it’s likely not going to be that good. Bravo uses the absolute worst atomic drop I’ve ever seen. He just drops Tornado and it’s very sad indeed. Bravo hits his finisher and no one really is surprised when Tornado kicks out.

This is one of those matches that is on there for the purposes of filling in the card and everyone knows it. Bravo is LONG past his point of usefulness and Von Erich just never clicked in this company past a hot debut period. This is nothing at all and it knows it’s nothing at all.

Tornado locks in his Claw Hold and after about ten seconds the announcers acknowledge it. He then hits the spinning punch of death to pin Bravo as there’s literally no commentary for about 10 more seconds. They really didn’t care and neither do I.

Rating: F. When Gorilla Monsoon, the man that likely cared as much about the WWF than anyone else has nothing to say, you know it sucks.

Slick and Warlord babble about beating up the British Bulldog

British Bulldog and his dog Winston say they can beat the Warlord. You know, if Davey hadn’t had that stupid mascot, he could have been legendary. Everything about him just screams GIVE ME THE TITLE! At least in this interview it does.

Warlord vs. British Bulldog

Warlord has that sweet half mask at this point. The Bulldog hails from Leeds. Just thought I’d throw that out there. Power vs. Power again here, but I’m not as worried as I was about the last one. Considering this is Stars and Stripes Wrestlemania, the Bulldog’s pops are insane. Heck those would be great pops anywhere.

He had the look, the talent, the moves, the fan support, everything he needed to be a mega star. What that never happened is beyond me, but I think it wore yellow and red. I’m really not wild on having back to back power vs. power matches but this is definitely an upgrade. Davey runs through Warlord to start us off here and sends him to the floor with some shoulder blocks.

Crucifix doesn’t work as Warlord counters into a Samoan Drop for no cover. Gorilla and Heenan are stealing the show. Heenan: “I was knighted by Queen Elizabeth you know.” Gorilla: “You keep this up I’ll have you crowned as well.” We get the loudest pop for a bearhug that I’ve EVER heard as this crowd is really quite hot. Total slugout here for the most part but it’s working.

Warlord gets a belly to belly out of nowhere to take Bulldog down and the crowd will not stop cheering. This is rather impressive. Warlord wastes time like the idiot that he is but for once it doesn’t cost him. On to the weakest chinlock I can remember in a very long time to waste some more time. Smith fights up and hits a VERY good dropkick to take over.

It amazes me how versatile he was at this time and wouldn’t get his big push for over a year and a half. Granted some of that was due to Flair showing up and changing the whole thing which can’t be blamed on Vince. Piledriver attempt by Davey is blocked into a backdrop into a sunset flip for two.

There’s the full nelson from Warlord out of nowhere and Davey is in trouble. He can’t lock in the fingers though so there’s a chance for escape for our hero. The fingers aren’t locked and Davey is able to bust out of it in a surprise which hadn’t been done before I don’t think. A second later, Davey picks Warlord up and walks around with him for a bit and DRILLS him with the powerslam to end it. This was a miracle.

Rating: B-. I liked it. Bulldog is completely carrying this match though and it’s clear who the top talent here is. By far and away Warlord’s best match ever and something that I probably have overrated. It’s awesome for some reason though and I think a lot of it is due to the crowd being WAY into this. Very fun match indeed.

Jimmy Hart and the most overrated tag team I’ve ever seen, the Nasty Boys, are going to take the tag titles by cracking the foundation. The Harts disagree. Neidhart is pretty good on the mic, but Hitman is clearly the star here. This was at the very end of their run as a tag team and Bret is like Shawn at this point: ready and just waiting to be told to go for it.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

For God knows why, Jimmy Hart is wearing a motorcycle helmet. Bret and Sags start us off here. Bret manages to beat up both guys on his own as you can see the singles push dripping and ready to come out. Anvil vs. Knobbs now. Who named these two guys? The Nasty Boys I mean. Anvil hammers away and Brian is in big trouble early on.

Both Harts have managed to clear the ring on their own which is always a cool thing to see. Back off to Bret again as it’s ALL Harts for about the first five minutes or so. Bret takes a clothesline though to send him to the floor. Anvil chases Jimmy and let’s talk about Hogan. To the shock of absolutely no one, Bret gets beaten on for the vast majority of the time he’s in, as is his custom.

Heenan tries to imitate Gorilla’s commentary when he gets all technical about body parts in a funny but too short bit. Sags gets a chinlock on Bret and cranks on it which gets him nowhere again. Knobbs plays Monkey See Monkey Do as he locks in the same move which gets him nowhere either.

Neckbreaker gets two for Sags as it’s so cute to see him try to wrestle out there. He REALLY likes that chinlock as we see it again. Now Knobbs try it again. They’ve probably spent 3-4 minutes on that freaking chinlock over and over again. We get the oldest and one of the best tag moves in the books as Anvil gets the tag but it isn’t seen.

Heel miscommunication sets up the REAL hot tag and Neidhart cleans house. The Harts were awesome as a team and it’s a shame they’re not credited more than they are. I know they’re considered great but you don’t hear them talked about much anymore, or at least not enough for my liking.

Everything breaks down one more time and it’s a Hart Attack for Knobbs. And there comes the infamous Megaphone as Anvil is getting rid of Sags. Knobbs gets the pin on Bret to steal the titles. Jimmy’s near orgasm where he rolls all over the ground and kicks his feet and kisses the title is pretty hilarious stuff.

Rating: C-. They were trying, but you can’t sell the Nastys going over the Harts to me no matter what. I think this was their last time teaming together as well as Bret went for singles competition after this. The Nastys held the titles over the Summer before losing them at Summerslam to the LOD in their first title reign. Not terrible but the Nastys have never done it for me at all.

We recap Roberts vs. Martel. Now this match is 90% backstory. Jake Roberts was on the Brother Love Show and for some reason that was never explained, Rick Martel came out and sprayed Jake’s bag with Arrogance, his cologne that he carried everywhere with him and when Jake went to stop him, Jake got hit in the eye with it, allegedly blinding him.

I’ve always assumed Jake had an injury or something because he was out nearly 8 months over this. He finally came back to feud with Martel, and this was the match in which he would get his revenge. To play up on the blindness, both men’s heads have hoods over them from which they allegedly couldn’t see. This was voted worst match of the year I believe and I think I know why.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Remember, neither guy can allegedly see here. Jake looks somewhat drunk here. Let the stupidity begin as the crowd has to tell them where the other guy is. No contact a minute in. Their feet touch a bit and Martel falls over Jake as we’re in a glorified comedy match. We get proof they can see as Martel sets for a backdrop and Jake runs around him. In a kayfabe sense, why would ANYONE do that?

They back into each other and then charge and miss each other. This is so painfully stupid I can’t imagine what the person that came up with it was on. Must have been a bondage enthusiast. Martel gets a slam as the biggest move of the first three and a half minutes then misses an elbow. Heenan starts repeating Monsoon in a funny bit.

Martel finds the referee twice in a row which gets him nowhere of course. Jake does a thing where he runs his finger around the ring and the crowd cheers when he points at Martel. Now he’s clapping. How are we five minutes into this already? Heenan: why doesn’t Martel peak? Gorilla: that’s cheating! Heenan: so what??? That’s an excellent point actually.

Apparently the snake now weighs 500lbs according to Heenan. The fans chant DDT. I think they want the pesticide to kill themselves. It must be a better treatment than having to watch this. Martel runs into the bag in the corner and we STILL have had a total of maybe 20 seconds of contact in over six minutes of the match. I can’t refer to it as wrestling or action as it has been neither.

Jake gets a headlock and is sent to the floor off a counter. Heenan: HEY MARTEL! HE’S ON THE FLOOR! Martel, like an idiot, goes to the floor and grabs a chair which he pokes around with. He swings the chair at a post and hurts his hand. They finally find each other, I think out of boredom. Boston Crab goes on and Jake is in trouble. Never mind as he kicks him off and gets the DDT to finally end this mess.

Rating: F. What they were thinking here I don’t have a clue, but this was just a terrible match. The fans were into it for some reason but for almost 10 minutes they do nothing but hunt for each other or land a punch or two here and there. Just a complete waste of time.

That woman from earlier is in the locker room as the Nastys celebrate. What is the point of this again?

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

And so it began. You know where this goes. No promos or anything as Taker was just squashing people at this point. We start with a LONG staredown and again no contact. Bearer is as freaky looking as ever. Taker drills Snuka and we’re finally getting going here. The jumping clothesline takes Snuka down and it’s one sided already.

Heenan tries to figure out the Urn which hasn’t been done in nearly 20 years so far but whatever. Gorilla says people with white coats and a net are coming after Bearer. That would be after his son actually but who’s counting? Snuka comes back with pure jobber offense that gets him a grand total of nowhere. He hotshots himself to the floor though and that should just about do it. Taker catches a springboard cross body and the Tombstone kills Jimmy with ease.

Rating: D+. This is mostly for historical significance as the match itself is nothing. It’s a squash and a fairly bad one at that. However, no one at the time knew what would come from this. Truly a piece of wrestling history and you have to wonder if anyone could have dreamed that this would be the first in a streak that got Taker what, three or four world titles at Mania? Remarkable.

We see a video package highlighting the events leading up to the Career Ending Match between Macho Man and Ultimate Warrior. Back when Warrior was champion, Macho Man wanted a title shot and he attacked Warrior to get one. Sherri, in one of the most sexually dripping promos of all time, literally gets on her knees and begs Warrior for a title shot. He says no.

At the 91 Rumble, Warrior defended against Sgt. Slaughter. Sherri came out and got Warrior to chase her, allowing Savage to beat him up. Warrior winds up coming back and almost winning, but here comes Sherri again. He reaches to grab her and Savage pops up and blasts him in the head with his scepter, allowing Slaughter to drop an elbow and pin him for the title. That brings us here.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

If WM 6 was Warrior’s greatest match, this is his second greatest. Before the match though, Bobby Heenan sees none other than Miss Elizabeth sitting in the front row. She hadn’t been seen in the WWF in nearly a year at this point so this was very surprising. Amazingly enough, Heenan can spot her from at least 50 yards away, when the camera can barely recognize her 10 feet away. You have to love kayfabe.

Warrior walks to the ring which freaks everyone out. I’ve seen this match a few dozen times and it still works every single time. This feels totally epic which is exactly the idea. Warrior has the belt on the back of his tights which he never would win again. Feeling out process to start as of course Warrior has the power advantage.

Warrior overpowers him to start and controls early on, much like Hogan did to Savage two years ago. In case I forgot this is a career ending match. How in the world did I forget to say that? Sherri comes in so Warrior throws Savage at her to send her back to the floor. We hit the floor where Savage tries to play mind games by throwing in a chair. That gets him nowhere.

All Warrior so far but it’s incredibly early so it means nothing at all. Savage finally gets Warrior to make a mistake and Warrior is sent to the floor. Sherri keeps interfering but thankfully they don’t throw the match out because of it. This is the largest PPV audience ever which is laughable to think they could know that halfway through the show but whatever.

Warrior cranks it up again and then does something very odd (I’m shocked too). With Savage down on one knee and with his head down, Warrior goes for a flying tackle which more or less looks like a flying headbutt because Savage is still down. It was just weird looking and I have no idea what he was thinking at all. Anyway it lets Savage take over.

Double clothesline puts both guys down though. And now we pause to look at Sherri’s rather nice figure. In a nice nod to Mania 3, Savage gets rolled up off a slam but there’s no referee due to Sherri. There goes said referee so it’s a free for all now. Sherri takes off the shoe and goes up but it hits Savage in the head by mistake.

Savage gets a rollup for two as Heenan says he can’t even talk anymore which Gorilla doesn’t even reply to. You can tell he’s into this. We now hit one of the more famous parts of the match as Savage goes up and hits FIVE elbow drops from the top when I think only Hogan and George Steele (yes that George Steele) had ever kicked out of one.

The reaction from Heenan to the kick out is absolutely excellent. Savage is SHOCKED. Warrior Hulks Up and hits four or five clotheslines to take Savage down. Gorilla Press and splash only get two though and now Warrior is SHOCKED. Warrior looks up into the sky to ask “his gods” about whether it’s his time to leave and he walks out.

Savage jumps him instead and brings him back and we go on. Warrior is draped across the barricade but Savage misses and is more or less dead on his feet. Warrior throws his body back in and hits a bunch of BIG shoulder blocks with Savage selling like no one else could, making himself look like a rag doll. He hits the floor three times and is just dead. Warrior puts his foot on the chest and is triumphant. That’s the basis for KB vs. Sabre for you OCW fans.

Rating: A+. Combining the post match stuff with the match, this is easily the best segment to date in Wrestlemania history and is easily one of the best of all time. It’s a shame it’s almost forgotten today due to Vince’s vendettas against both guys. This is an absolute classic and DEFINITELY the best Mania match in a very long time. I’d put it maybe in the top five Mania matches in the WWF Era and easily top ten ever at this show. Great match and absolutely worth seeing.

The real memory of this match comes afterwards though in what is likely considered the most emotional moment in WWF history. Savage is still out cold in the ring and Sherri comes in and freaks out on him, saying that he ended her career too. Both commentators are saying to give him a break and that no one else, not even Hogan could have taken this kind of a beating and survived.

Sherri starts to kick him with her high heels when Savage couldn’t hold off a toddler at this point. With her beating Savage up, Miss Elizabeth jumps the guard rail and for the first time ever, attacks someone by throwing Sherri out of the ring as the crowd is stunned to see her. Savage tries to get up but doesn’t know who was beating on him. He turns to see Liz and almost falls to the ground again in shock.

The referee tells him it was Sherri kicking him and he’s even more confused. Liz opens her arms and after a few moments Savage hugs her as the crowd absolutely loses it. Savage puts her on his shoulders and there is nothing but cheering and crying from the crowd. Heenan is beside himself at “this sickening display.”

Finally they’re ready to leave and in the ultimate display of his love, Savage refuses to let Liz hold the ropes open for him as she did for years and instead holds them open for her, truly showing he’s a changed man. This is probably the best emotional moment ever at this point and still holds up to this day. Incredible stuff and again, definitely something worth seeing.

We go from one of the most emotional moments in wrestling history to… a debate on instant replay. Yes you read that right. Vince McMahon acts on moderator (C.M. > Vince) between Paul McGuire and George Steinbrenner of all people as they argue over instant replay.

During the debate, McGuire calls Steinbrenner a butt head, leading to Vince to call on his instant replay “officials” to review it. As this continues to spiral into udder stupidity, the Bushwackers are the officials. They say that there’s inconclusive evidence, therefore the insult stands. Finally this ends and we go back to the arena. This was somehow stupider than it sounds.

Trebek talks to Demolition who scares him off.

Regis talks to…….GENICHIRO TENRYU????? He’s here with Kitao who isn’t anyone special but I’ve heard of him. They can’t understand Regis.

Trebek is scared of Jake.
Demolition vs. Tenryu/Kitao

I know who the two Japanese wrestlers are, but why in the heck are they on Wrestlemania? Demolition was little more than jobbers at this point. After they lost the titles to the Harts at Summerslam 90 Ax had left so this is Smash and Crush. They had also gotten Mr. Fuji back at this point.

Crush and Kitao start us off here. Kitao is a big old boy too. Fuji gets a cane shot in almost immediately as it looks like dominance from Demolition to start. Heenan makes Japanese jokes as this is mostly dominance. Somehow Kitao is named Fred. Tenryu comes in and avoids the Decapitator and hits a big powerbomb on Crush to…get the pin? WOW. This was Demolition’s last match too. Odd indeed.

Rating: W. As in what were they thinking here? I know that Tenryu is a Japanese legend, but no one knew who he was at Wrestlemania. The crowd is silent when Demolition lost. This wasn’t even a loss but rather a squash. This whole match made absolutely zero sense.

Big Bossman says he’s coming for Heenan after he gets the IC Title.

Heenan says he’s not afraid of Bossman.

Intercontinental Title: Big Bossman vs. Mr. Perfect

Bossman is insanely over at this point having been running around with Hogan all through the second half of the year. Heenan had been talking trash about Bossman’s mama, and you don’t talk bad about a Southern boy’s mother. Bossman went to war with the Heenan Family and the only person left was their top wrestler, Mr. Perfect.

Considering Bossman weighs more than Kane, the stuff he can do in the ring is mind blowing. He moves like someone Chavo’s size. All signs point to this being the changing of the title. Perfect throws the towel at Boss Man so Boss Man spits at Perfect. Perfect’s selling goes insane of course and it works great. Boss Man throws some GREAT punches.

I feel like I’m watching a match on fast forward. A charge misses though and we slow things WAY down all of a sudden. Boss Man pulls his belt out which is allegedly a foreign object but I’m not sure how. It would seem perfectly legal to me as he brought it in with him didn’t he? There’s the abdominal stretch as the belt didn’t get Boss Man very far at all.

There’s that neck snap from Perfect which is always fun to see. Perfectplex is blocked though but Boss Man can’t get anything going at all. Perfect gets a reverse neck snap which we would more or less call a Blockbuster today. He goes up but does the jump into the boot spot to set up Boss Man’s comeback.

Perfect gets the tar punched out of him which doesn’t take much as I don’t think there’s much tar in him for the most part. Boss Man rams into the steps though and Heenan gets some shots in. The crowd pops like a cherry though as here comes Andre. Heenan LOSES IT and Andre grabs the belt just because he wants to. He DRILLS Perfect with it but the Heenan Family runs in for the save before Boss Man can get the title. The overly large faces clear the ring. Odd finish.
Rating: C-. This again is historic as it’s Andre’s last WM appearance. It really is sad to see him in such physically bad shape. He would be dead in less than two years, just after the debut of Monday Night Raw, I believe the day of the third show. For the life of me I do not get why Boss Man didn’t get the title here as every single sign on the planet would have pointed to it. No clue what the reasoning was here though.

We see Bossman and Andre saying that the war with Heenan isn’t over. Actually it was.

The following people are here and talked to by Gene:

Lou Ferrigno (the Incredible Hulk)

Donald Trump

Chuck Norris

Henry Winkler (FONZIE!!!!!)

What an odd grouping indeed.
Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

This is about as close to nothing as you can get. Hammer gets in a few elbows and then goes down with ease to the Earthquake splash. It was a squash that somehow went three minutes but you get the idea. There was a powerslam thrown in there somewhere. Hammer did manage to get Quake down and go for the Figure Four but it went nowhere. Why in the world is Valentine a face anyway?

Rating: N/A. Very little here and to have someone as good as Valentine reach this point in his career is kind of sad. Total squash despite the fact that Earthquake was about to become a tag team guy with Tugboat.

The LOD want the belts from the Nastys and they’re going to make Power and Glory sour and gory.

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

This match lasts less than a minute as LOD destroy Hercules and Paul “I was a Horsemen blast it” Roma. Back to back squashes though? Really? Match ran 59 seconds somehow and the Doomsday Device ended it.

Rating: N/A. The only thing keeping this above failing is the LOD’s music. They were so over it’s not even funny.

We recap the events leading up to DiBiase and Virgil. Over the years, Virgil did every disgusting thing that DiBiase told him to do and finally he snapped. Roddy Piper began encouraging him and we get to this match. At the Rumble Virgil and DiBiase had been a team and Virgil got pinned. DiBiase blamed him and told him to wrap the belt around his waist, but Virgil hit him with it instead.

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

DiBiase rarely ever lost at this point so this was viewed as a squash. Virgil actually goes on for ten minutes. Roddy Piper is in his corner on crutches as he had recently been in a motorcycle wreck. Virgil tags DiBiase with punches to start which are about all he’s got. DiBiase hits the floor as he’s all frustrated now.

Back in the ring and DiBiase takes down Virgil with a clothesline to get control for a bit. The common idea here was that Virgil couldn’t wrestle but he had been trained and was a regular wrestler in the indies before he came to WWF and had at least two matches before this one in a WWF ring. DiBiase gets a Piledriver as Virgil is in trouble.

Beautiful gutwrench suplex gets two. DiBiase sends him to the floor and then yells at Piper. He kicks out the crutch from under his leg to send him down because he’s a bad man. Piper hooks the top rope and Piper hits the floor. More yelling and shoving of men on crutches ends this though as we have a countout with Virgil winning in a shock.

Rating: C-. This feud was years in the making and the emotion was there, but it was on way too late in the card and the people wanted to see Hogan. Having Virgil get the win was huge though.

Slaughter and General Adnan, a.k.a. the Iron Sheik, say that there’s a new set of rules, and there’s a chance he might accidentally get counted out or DQed tonight.

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

No point at all to this one but we’ll throw it in here to fill in some time. Tito runs Mountie around for a few seconds, Mountie can barely do anything, Jimmy slis him the shock stick and Mountie uses it on Santana and pins him. Absolutely no one cares and neither do I. Only significance is Santana continues to have been at every Wrestlemania thus far which I think only Hogan is the other person to do so.

Rating: N/A. Nothing special here as it was a pure filler.

We finally get to the recap for Hogan and Slaughter. The main idea is that Slaughter is threatening to lose on purpose so Hogan doesn’t win the title. Slaughter is an Iraqi sympathizer so the feud was based off Operation Desert Storm, or as it’s more commonly known, the Gulf War. Pay no attention to the fact that the war was already over by this point.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Hmm. I think I may have to bet on this Slaughter guy. It seems likely that he’s going to win it as I think this Hogan chap is overmatched. Is there any reason as to why Alex Trebek is the guest announcer here? I mean dude, IT’S ALEX TREBEK! Anyway, Hogan of course is absolutely insanely over but that pop would start to die off rather soon.

Regis is on commentary for this which is even weirder. Long feeling out process as they feel out each other’s power. Hogan sends him to the floor which gets him a few good shots in. Slaughter begs off back in the ring but gets an eye rake like the evil….American that he is. Yeah this was kind of a weird setup. Heenan keeps talking about some party he’s having on Prime Time Wrestling.

Slaughter in control now as Regis shows that he has zero business being a commentator on the main event of Mania, as he has nothing to say. That’s not his fault of course, but he is just kind of there. No one wants to come to Bobby’s party. That’s rather amusing indeed. Hogan takes over again and does more or less nothing special at all.

A knee to the back sends Slaughter into the buckle. A slingshot makes him completely miss the post but we’ll say it hit anyway. After a good long beating, Hogan shows how stupid he can be and goes up to the middle rope which doesn’t work. He more or less no sells the shot Slaughter gets on him and goes to the top? What the heck??? Adnan interferes and Hogan pulls a Flair in a funny spot.

Slaughter Cannon sends Hogan to the floor. He beats the tar out of Hogan with a chair on the floor which gets him somewhere for a change. The referee won’t count him out or DQ him though. Well that’s certainly nice of him isn’t it? Back in the ring now with Slaughter hooking a Boston Crab after pounding away for awhile on the back.

You know this hold would look a bit more realistic and painful if Hogan wasn’t just barely beneath the rope and that by moving maybe 8 inches up the hold would be broken. Granted that might just be me overthinking this. Slaughter works on the back forever and gets a chair shot to the head to bust open Hulk. Can we please just get to him breaking the camel clutch and getting the title back?

THANK YOU! Slaughter gets his UNBREAKABLE, yes UNBREAKABLE I SAY, hold on Hogan who of course, just like he did to the Sheik, breaks it. Slaughter gets him down again (to humble him perhaps?) and drapes the Iraqi flag over him because he is a very stupid man. Hogan kicks out and you can fill in the blanks yourself.

Rating: C+. Easily more about symbolism, but there was one major flaw: the war was already over when this match took place. It was like TNA in levels of being behind the times. This was a fairly decent match though and I thought it worked well enough for what it was supposed to do. The Hogan pop was starting to die off though and it would become much clearer in the future.

Overall Rating: C. This really isn’t one of the great Manias but it has one of the best moments of all time. The problem in this Mania is the mid card is just awful. The big midcard match ended in a DQ and was a way to get Andre on the show. There’s just nothing here and with Savage stealing the show from Hogan again, it hurts the show a bit.

The complete lack of drama in the main event doesn’t help things either as Slaughter spent all night talking about losing on purpose and you never once see that in the main event. It’s not a bad show, but it’s far from great. Watch it for the Savage and Hogan matches and if you just need to kill some time, the opener.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Fastlane 2019
Date: March 10, 2019
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Renee Young, Corey Graves

I’m not sure what to think of with this show as there’s only so much that can be done with a show that clearly serves as nothing more than a last stop on the way to Wrestlemania. There are some matches tonight that could go somewhere but a lot of what we’ll be seeing is going to be a stepping stone towards next month. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: New Day vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev

Lana is in Nakamura/Rusev’s corner and has her hair cut to its NXT length. It’s Big E./Xavier Woods for New Day here with Woods and Nakamura starting things off. Some whips into the corner don’t work for Nakamura as Woods snaps off a headscissors for an early two. A kick to the head drops Woods though and we take an early break.

Back with Rusev driving shoulders into Woods’ ribs in the corner and slapping on a bearhug. Nakamura comes back in for a front facelock as we go split screen to show Miz talking to his dad about bringing the titles home tonight. Shane McMahon comes in to say the same and the former champs are ready. Back to full screen with Woods getting away and making the hot tag to Big E. for some short form house cleaning. Nakamura’s guillotine choke slows things down but Big E. suplexes him away without much effort.

Nakamura snaps the throat across the ropes and gets two off a middle rope knee to the chest. Woods comes back in and gets kicked in the head, setting up a DDT to give Rusev two. A wheelbarrow suplex gets two and the sliding knee from Nakamura connects for the same. Woods rolls over for the tag to Big E. but Lana crotches Woods to break up UpUpDownDown.

The Machka Kick gets two on Big E. as Woods makes a diving save. Woods’ running flip dive onto both villains is countered into a double powerbomb for two back inside and Rusev is stunned. The Accolade goes on but Big E. going after Nakamura is enough for the break. It’s back t Big E. and now UpUpDownDown can connect for the pin at 13:18.

Rating: B. This was a downright good match that got more time than I was expecting to see. They had the chemistry rolling with Big E. and Woods, the weaker of the New Day combinations, more than hanging with two solid midcard stars. I’m not wild on Rusev taking the pin, but it’s the logical result here.

The Rey Mysterio vs. Andrade match has been removed from the Kickoff Show and added to the main show as part of a four way for the US Title, also involving Samoa Joe and R-Truth.

The opening video looks at everyone trying to get to Wrestlemania. That would be a more effective theme is the show wasn’t likely to have fifteen matches with more than half of them being multi-person matches.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Shane McMahon/The Miz

Shane and Miz are challenging after losing the titles last month with Miz’s dad in the front row. Shane kicks at Jimmy to start as Jey talks about Shane’s shoes. Jimmy gets knocked down into the corner and Miz comes in for some double stomps. A Hart Attack gets two on Jimmy as Graves keeps ripping on Miz’s dad. Jey comes in and Shane walks into a clothesline to put the champs in control.

The chinlock goes on for a good while until Shane fights up with a tornado DDT. That’s enough for the hot tag off to Miz, who cleans house to take over. Miz sends the Usos outside for a big dive off the top (you don’t see that very often) which gets some applause from Miz’s dad. Back in and Jimmy gets two off a Samoan drop with Shane making the save.

Shane gets knocked down and it’s the Skull Crushing Finale to Jey but the referee is checking on Shane, meaning it’s only a near fall. Jey sends Miz into the post but the Usos spend too much time yelling at Miz’s dad, allowing Miz to get two off a rollup. With Jimmy down in the corner, Shane goes up so Jey gets up on the other corner. Jey goes to dive at Miz but Shane dropkicks him out of the air for a good looking crash. Miz goes up for a splash which hits knees, allowing Jimmy to roll him up for the pin to retain at 14:09.

Rating: B-. It was an entertaining match with Miz trying harder than usual but there’s only so much you can do to get around the fact that this is designed to set up Miz vs. Shane at Wrestlemania. There are so many other teams who could have been used in this spot but for some reason we’re stuck watching these two do their thing about Miz and his dad. I’m not sure who is supposed to care about this story, but I don’t think too many people are.

Post match Miz and Shane shake hands and go over to Miz’s dad. Everything seems ok until Shane jumps Miz, because we’re getting face Miz vs. heel Shane at Wrestlemania. Shane even shoves Miz’s dad and uses his well known MMA skills for a triangle choke on Miz. The hold is finally let go and Miz’s dad comes over the barricade to check on him. I’m so glad we’re giving Shane McMahon this story instead of all the people sitting on the sidelines. You have people leaving because they can’t get a spot, and Shane is getting featured in the first half hour of a pay per view.

Bobby Lashley, Baron Corbin and Drew McIntyre are ready to break the Shield again.

Here’s Elias for a song. He makes fun of Miz, mocks Cleveland and mentions Lebron James….and that’s it.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Mandy Rose vs. Asuka

Asuka is defending after Mandy (with Sonya Deville in her corner) pinned her in a non-title match a few weeks back. Mandy grabs a headlock to start but gets caught in an ankle lock. That’s enough to bring Sonya up to the apron, allowing Mandy to knee Asuka in the face for a closer two than it should have been. The abdominal stretch goes on with Graves praising Mandy even more than usual, sending Phillips into obvious fits of laughter on commentary.

The hold is reversed into an Octopus Hold as Sonya randomly looks underneath the ring. Asuka goes with the strikes into a release German suplex for two. A sliding knee gets two more but the running hip attack misses, allowing Mandy to score with another jumping knee. Asuka knees her even harder so Sonya goes underneath the ring for a kendo stick. Mandy trips over the raised ring skirt though and Asuka scores with a kick to the head to retain at 6:38.

Rating: C. Mandy has gotten way better in a hurry and that’s a good sign for her future. Just looking at her, you would expect her to be nothing but eye candy, but she’s actually turned into someone worthwhile who can have a good match with a lot of people. This was WAY better than it had any right to be, though the ending was a big head scratch inducing.

Post match Mandy doesn’t want to hear from Sonya.

Earlier tonight, Kofi Kingston was told to go see the McMahons about the Smackdown World Title match. He’s still waiting outside when the rest of New Day comes up to say they need to go in now. Woods and Big E. give Vince a great speech about how Kofi has been waiting for eleven years and now it needs to be a triple threat. Vince makes it a triple threat with Kofi in the title match RIGHT NOW with New Day barred from ringside.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Kevin Owens

Bryan is defending. Actually hang on a second as Kofi has his entrance, but we’re told the match is taking place later tonight. Instead we get this.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Bar

The Bar doesn’t have to tag so the double teaming is on in a hurry. Kofi tries to fight back but is quickly taken down for a double leg crank. The beating heads to the floor but this time Kofi actually knocks Sheamus down on the apron. Cesaro catches him inside though and the powerbomb/top rope clothesline combination destroys Kofi again. The fans declare this boring as the Brogue Kick gets two with Cesaro pulling Kofi up. Cue New Day for the save but Rusev/Nakamura cut them off. The super White Noise finishes Kofi with feet on the chest at 5:08.

Rating: D. Pure angle advancement and that’s fine. There’s only so much you can get out of something like this and you can’t blame the wrestlers for not having a good match here. Kofi’s push towards the title like this feels a bit rushed though and it wouldn’t surprise me to see him lose again to set up the (hopeful) title change at Wrestlemania.

Sasha Banks and Bayley are ready to defend the titles against anyone and they’re ready for Nia Jax and Tamina tonight.

Elias sings again, this time about how Kofi and Miz looked like Cleveland Cavaliers.

We recap Shane turning on Miz. It was less than 45 minutes ago!

Shane has nothing to say.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet vs. Chad Gable/Bobby Roode

The Revival is defending so the challengers send them outside in all of two seconds. Roode and Gable join them on the floor, leaving Ricochet and Black to moonsault into their poses. We settle down to Gable waistlocking Ricochet down but getting thrown off for a break. Wilder tags himself in and it’s quickly off to Dawson for an assisted suplex. Gable tags himself in as well and gets two off his own suplex. The armbar doesn’t last long as Dawson comes in and drops Ricochet ribs first across the top rope.

Some elbows get two but Ricochet rolls forward for a dropkick to Dawson. That’s enough for a double tag to bring in Black and Roode with Aleister cleaning house. It’s too early for Black Mass as Roode sends the kick into Dawson and spinebusters Black for two. Everything breaks down and Gable German suplexes Dawson with Wilder coming off the top with a splash for the save.

Ricochet’s shooting star gets two with Roode making a save of his own. Everyone heads outside with Ricochet and Dawson being left on top. Ricochet hurricanranas him down, landing head first on the apron in the process. Thankfully he’s not dead and hits a running flip dive over the top onto Roode, with Gable tagging himself in as Ricochet is flying through the air (legal, believe it or not). It’s a bad idea though as the Shatter Machine finishes Gable to retain the titles at 10:47.

Rating: B. This was good stuff with another obvious winner, which will lead to Revival losing the non-title matches for weeks. It’s smart to have Roode/Gable take the fall (as they could have for weeks instead of Revival) as Black and Ricochet are still new and shouldn’t be getting pinned yet. It’s the best match of the night so far, though I’m not sure how strong of a compliment that is.

Post match the Revival goes after Black and Ricochet, earning a 630.

US Title: Samoa Joe vs. R-Truth vs. Andrade vs. Rey Mysterio

Bonus match with Joe defending. All three challengers go to the floor so Joe is right there with a suicide elbow to all three of them. Back inside and Joe headbutts Andrade down in the corner but Truth is back up to take over. Rey comes in to send Andrade and Truth down but Joe runs Rey over. A heck of a tornado DDT gives Rey two on Joe so Andrade takes Rey up top.

Truth makes a save and it’s a super hurricanrana to Andrade to give Truth two with Rey breaking it up with a slingshot legdrop. Rey dives at Joe and gets caught, only to have Andrade missile dropkick both of them. Andrade isn’t done as he hits two of Three Amigos, with Rey reversing the third into a small package for two. With Andrade on the floor, Rey hits a hurricanrana off the apron, leaving Zelina Vega to kick Truth in the head.

That means a fight with Carmella, so Joe Rock Bottoms Rey for two. Truth fights back and hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle on Joe but the ax kick misses. That means a whip into the post to get rid of Truth but Rey is there with the 619. Dropping the Dime misses though and Joe chokes Rey out to retain at 10:51.

Rating: B-. It’s not as good as their match on Smackdown but what we got here was good while it lasted. I was worried they would switch the title already so it’s a relief that Joe got to retain. It’s a positive sign that he might actually keep the title and stick around as champion for more than a few weeks.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Boss N Hug Connection vs. Tamina/Nia Jax

Beth Phoenix is on commentary. Bayley/Sasha Banks are defending and Graves is suggesting a split in the near future. Banks kicks Nia in the face to start and it’s off to Bayley so Nia throws Banks at her for a good visual. Tamina comes in to take over and the Samoans take turns beating on her in the corner.

A mini hot shot gets rid of Tamina though and it’s back to Banks to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down with Banks trying a suicide dive but getting pulled out of the air. Bayley dives onto the three of them before throwing Nia back in for a Meteora. The top rope elbow gets two with Tamina making the save, leaving Bayley to hurricanrana Nia for the pin to retain at 7:00.

Rating: D+. Well, they tried, and by they I mean Banks and Bayley. Nia and Tamina were as useless as ever here as big dragons who could barely move, as tends to be the case almost every time they’re out there. What in the world are you supposed to do with two monsters who can barely move? The champs need something better than this, but you can almost guarantee that Nia and Tamina will get another chance because they always do.

Post match the beatdown is on again until Beth gets up from commentary. Nia and Tamina beat her down until Natalya makes the save. The Samoans beat her down as well and stand tall. This is an exact summary of what is wrong with Nia: she’s a monster who loses a lot and then is right back the next week/night/two minutes later being a monster again. She lost a match FIVE MINUTES AGO and now we’re supposed to buy her as a monster. Graves asked “who is going to stop them”. Uh, BAYLEY AND SASHA PERHAPS???

This is what I mean when I say Nia needs to go away for a long time, but WWE insists on her being there. Oh and great: Natalya/Beth vs. Tamina/Nia is going to be on Wrestlemania now. A match that no one was asking for but we’re getting it anyway because that show isn’t going to be long enough already.

We recap Daniel Bryan vs. Kevin Owens. Kofi was originally supposed to get the shot but Vince got all evil and replaced him with Owens. Kevin has beaten Bryan in a tag match with a Stunner, though he feels like a filler challenger until Kofi gets the real shot.

Smackdown World Title: Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending….and this is still going to be a triple threat match.

Smackdown World Title: Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Mustafa Ali

Bryan, with Rowan in his corner, is defending and the fans are immediately there with the WE WANT KOFI chants. The bell rings and Bryan yells at the two of them, earning himself a double beatdown. Owens: “Save the planet somewhere else you idiot!” With Bryan down on the floor it’s Owens running Ali over with a shoulder. Bryan gets back in and starts with the kicks as the KOFI chants get even louder.

They all head outside with Owens Cannonballing them both against the barricade for two on Bryan. Ali comes back in and goes up top, where Bryan dropkicks him down into the barricade for a heck of a bump. That leaves Owens to take the kicks in the corner and it’s off to an armbar, drawing more KOFI chants. Bryan moonsaults over Owens out of the corner and hits the running clothesline but stops to kick Ali back outside.

The YES Kicks have Owens in more trouble as Ali comes back in for the rolling X Factor. Bryan runs him over again but Owens is up with the superkicks. Ali jumps on Owens’ back, only to be dropped down onto Bryan for a huge crash. It’s Bryan heading up top but having his Doomsday Device broken up and a super Spanish Fly plants him. Ali reverse hurricanranas Owens into position for the 054, which only hits mat. The Stunner gives Owens two on Ali and a Pop Up Powerbomb gets the same on Bryan.

Another powerbomb onto the apron is countered into a backdrop but Bryan’s running knee hit the post. Ali hits a 450 onto Bryan on the apron with Rowan making the save at two. Owens and Ali superkick the monster down but Ali’s dive is caught. Owens adds a big running flip dive but Bryan is right there with the running knee from the apron. Another running knee misses Bryan and Ali is right back with a middle rope tornado DDT to the floor.

Owens is back up to drop Ali again but Rowan sends Bryan inside and Owens through the timekeeper’s area. Back in and Bryan gets two as the fans get another chance to chant for Kofi. Bryan slaps Ali in the face while shouting YOU DON’T DESERVE TO BE HERE so Ali slaps back and goes up, only to dive into a knee to the face to retain Bryan’s title at 18:39.

Rating: B+. Distracting chants aside, this was a strong three way with the right winner (of the available options). The problem right now is WWE running basically the same story with Becky and Kofi and they’re risking the fans just not caring after being teased so many times. It works well enough if the title changes happen at Wrestlemania, but all these changes for the sake of changes and things happening during the shows are getting old.

Post match Rowan claw slams Ali.

We recap Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch. Becky was supposed to go to Wrestlemania but Vince said no and put Charlotte in the match instead. Then Stephanie decided to let Becky have another chance so if she wins tonight, she goes to Wrestlemania in a triple threat for the Raw Women’s Title.

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Becky limps to the ring on a crutch and also has a bad arm and bad ribs. She throws the crutch away and we’re ready to go with Charlotte easily taking things into the corner. Becky fights out of the corner with one right hand, only to have Charlotte say you’ll have to do more than that. A half crab wrecks the knee even more and Charlotte chop blocks the leg down.

Becky tries to fight back with a shot to the face but gets taken down with another chop block. Charlotte stays cocky and heads up top until Becky shoves her off and into the barricade for the big crash. Back in and the Becky gets the Disarm-Her, which is reversed into a Figure Eight….and here’s Ronda Rousey to hit Becky for the DQ to make it a triple threat at Wrestlemania at 8:43.

Rating: D. So the top face in the whole thing is beaten down again while the fresh heel runs in and attacks said face, thereby giving the fans what they want, while making sure Becky looks like a loser in the process. I’m sure we’ll hear from Stephanie about the whole thing though because this story is somehow her and her family. This is another match that could have been on Raw and no one would have noticed much of a difference.

Elias sings some more about how awful Cleveland is and says he’s done for the night. Lacey Evans comes out for her cameo and leaves as always. Randy Orton comes in with an RKO to Elias but walks into the Phenomenal Forearm from AJ Styles.

We recap the Shield vs. Baron Corbin/Bobby Lashley/Drew McIntyre. The Shield is back due to Roman Reigns being in remission. The other three are here because Shield needs targets.

Shield vs. Baron Corbin/Bobby Lashley/Drew McIntyre

Cole hypes up the idea of this being the last time for the Shield because Ambrose isn’t re-signing. The fight is on before the bell and the Shield clears the ring without much effort. Lashley takes Rollins into the corner to start and hands it off to Corbin, who gets taken into the middle buckle with a Downward Spiral. Ambrose comes in and fights McIntyre for a few moments before handing it back to Reigns, who doesn’t get much of a reaction.

McIntyre forearms him a few times before it’s quickly back to Rollins for a wishbone stretch. Corbin comes back in and takes over on Rollins, including the required chinlock. Seth fights up but gets cut off by McIntyre. That means a kick to the face and it’s back to Ambrose to take over. Dean sends McIntyre outside for a top rope elbow to the head but Lashley hits the spear. Ambrose barely beats the count back inside so Lashley plants him with a Downward Spiral for two.

A suplex and the rebound lariat to McIntyre are enough to bring in Reigns to wreck things. The apron dropkick to Corbin gets two as everything breaks down. Rollins and Ambrose hit stereo suicide dives onto McIntyre and Lashley, leaving Reigns’ big dive…to get cut off by Deep Six for two. Dean runs the announcers’ tables to take out Lashley, McIntyre and Rollins so Reigns and Corbin can slug it out.

Corbin chokeslams Reigns as the other four fight into the crowd by the Kickoff Show set. Reigns gets two off a sitout powerbomb as Rollins dives off a balcony to dive onto the other three. We get some miscommunication with Corbin trying his slide underneath the ropes and running through Reigns’ boot to the face like it didn’t make contact. A Superman Punch gets two as everyone is back to ringside.

End of Days hits Reigns with Rollins and Ambrose diving in for the save. Reigns almost gets TripleBombed through the announcers’ table but another save is made. A Stomp knocks Lashley silly and Reigns spears Corbin. There’s the TripleBomb to put McIntyre through the table and Corbin is left alone in the ring. One more TripleBomb finishes Corbin at 24:52.

Rating: B-. It was good, but egads the IT’S THE LAST TIME got obnoxious by the end. There was almost no doubt about how this was going and I don’t know how many people believe that it’s the last time for the team. At least Corbin took the fall instead of either of the other two, though it’s not like they had any chance between them. As usual, the Shield reunions weren’t great but that’s become the standard anymore.

Shield poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Yeah the show was watchable and even good at times, but I don’t remember a more annoying pay per view in a long time. The show is just now over and I don’t think I can remember one single thing here that felt like it mattered. There was good action, but nothing we haven’t seen done better before (in one case, earlier this week). WWE made it very clear that this show didn’t matter and that’s what we got here: a show that didn’t change anything and if you skipped it, you wouldn’t miss anything. I feel like I wasted my time tonight and that’s one of the worst feelings you can have coming out of a show.

Results

Usos b. Miz/Shane McMahon – Small package to Miz

Asuka b. Mandy Rose – Kick to the head

The Bar b. Kofi Kingston – Super White Noise

Revival b. Aleister Black/Ricochet and Bobby Roode/Chad Gable – Shatter Machine to Gable

Samoa Joe b. R-Truth, Andrade and Rey Mysterio – Koquina Clutch to Mysterio

Sasha Banks/Bayley b. Tamina/Nia Jax – Hurricanrana to Jax

Daniel Bryan b. Mustafa Ali and Kevin Owens – Knee to Ali

Becky Lynch b. Charlotte via DQ when Ronda Rousey interfered

Shield b. Baron Corbin/Drew McIntyre/Bobby Lashley – TripleBomb to Corbin

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6