In case you didn’t have enough news today.
https://wrestlingrumors.net/former-roh-world-champion-signs-wwe/
He’ll be going to NXT as you might have guessed. Word on the street as of late is that they’re thinking of doing an ROH stable in NXT. If that’s the case, Cole would be the perfect one to lead the talking.
https://wrestlingrumors.net/alberto-el-patron-stripped-gfw-world-title-still-suspended/
I’m kind of surprised but at the same time very glad. Until now, he had a (possibly paid) vacation and got to miss two house shows and no TV. That’s not exactly a punishment, but this feels like something different for a change. Well done GFW, as maybe ANYONE more interesting can be champion now.
Summerslam 2010
Date: August 15, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,178
Commentators: Matt Striker, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
Tonight’s show focuses on one idea: the Nexus Invasion. Back in February of 2010 ECW was replaced by a new competition show called NXT. Eight rookies tried to become the next WWE Superstar with Wade Barrett winning the competition. One night in June, these eight men invaded Raw and took over the arena to end the show. Over the next three months, these men, now called Nexus, terrorized the company and John Cena in particular. Tonight it’s Team WWE vs. Nexus in a Survivor Series elimination tag match. We also have Kane vs. Mysterio and Orton vs. Sheamus in the title matches. Let’s get to it.
The opening video is about how change can affect so many things, such as Nexus destroying everything in sight.
Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler
Dolph is defending and has Vickie with him. These two have fought a ridiculous number of times, even trumping Edge vs. Cena. Ziggler took the title nine days ago with Vickie’s assistance. Vickie’s EXCUSE ME is finally cut off by Kofi’s music. Kingston quickly takes him down and stomps away before clotheslining Dolph to the outside. A suicide dive totally misses though and Ziggler gets a breather.
Back in and the champion pounds away before getting two off a neckbreaker. We hit an early chinlock but Kofi is out of it in a few seconds. Instead Dolph sends him face first into the buckle for two before hitting a Hennig neck snap for two. Off to a reverse chinlock for a few moments until the jumping elbow drop gets two for Dolph.
We hit chinlock #4 but Kofi gets bored and goes off on the champion before hitting the Boom Drop. The middle rope cross body is rolled through, getting a two for Dolph as things speed up. A Fameasser puts Kofi down for two more but he pops up and clotheslines Dolph back down. The champion avoids Trouble in Paradise and hooks his sleeper but the Nexus runs in for the DQ.
Rating: D+. These two are capable of having far better matches if they don’t have to kill time until the run-in ending. Far too much of the match was spent in the chinlockery and it’s a rare bad opening match for Summerslam. Kofi continues his career path as Ziggler is about to start his climb to almost the top of the company.
Ziggler bails and Nexus destroys Kingston. Barrett talks about how Team WWE only has six men but the seventh doesn’t matter because Nexus is going to destroy them. This felt like the opening of Raw.
Jericho begs Mr. MITB and the US Champion the Miz to be on Team WWE. Edge is on the Miz’s other side eating a Slim Jim because Edge is awesome. Jericho says Miz doing this in LA could be bigger than Titanic or Avatar Miz doesn’t seem intersted.
Divas Title: Alicia Fox vs. Melina
Alicia is champion and the flavor of the month of the division. Melina has on a headdress that makes her look like a peacock. She looks….stupid. Melina takes forever taking off her furry boots before we’re finally ready to go. After they stare at each other for a good while Melina shoves her into the corner and then they stare at each other some more. The champion takes it to the mat with a headlock before Melina comes up with forearms. Off to a kind of Indian Deathlock with a curb stomp to Fox followed by a pair of knees to Fox’s ribs.
Some more forearms have Fox in trouble but Melina lands on her bad knee which cost her eight months off. The knee is good enough for Melina to superkick Fox, only to be sent shoulder first into the post. Back in and Fox goes after the arm because she’s not that bright. Melina realizes how stupid this is and makes her comeback with a kick to the ribs. A LOUD scream sets up a kick to the back and kind of a Diamond Cutter faceplant for the pin and the title.
Rating: D-. Both girls looked great but my dear merciful goodness Fox was embarrassing out there. When Jerry Lawler is making fun of you for having a lack of psychology, it’s a bad sign for your match. The Divas division hit a black hole after Trish and Lita left and this was a great example of how bad it was getting.
Post match Josh Matthews goes in to talk to Melina but here’s Laycool to interrupt. They’re the co-women’s champions here after literally tearing the belt in two. They try to take a picture with Melina but she kicks them both in the ribs. Layla trips Melina up though, allowing Michelle to clearly not make contact on a big boot. Fox tries to join in but gets beaten down as well. The titles would be unified next month.
Trace Adkins, Marlon Wayans and Michael Clarke Duncan are here.
We recap Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society. Mysterio had won a match against Punk, forcing him to shave his head. Punk wore a mask to hide it but Big Show ripped it off to humiliate him. Punk’s Society (Luke Gallows, Joey Mercury and Serena) got together and broke Big Show’s hand in a segment much funnier than it should have been due to Big Show’s face while being choked out.
Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society
Three on one handicap match. Punk has already grown his hair to a bit shorter than it is in 2013. We continue the awesome that is CM Punk as he wears a shirt saying “I Broke Big Show’s Hand”, which is a reference to Greg Valentine’s “I Broke Wahoo’s Leg” shirt from about thirty years ago. Show takes off his cast to reveal that the hand is fully healed and to freak Punk out a bit.
Mercury charges right into a chop and Gallows gets the same. The Society has to tag in and out here so Punk calls a conference on the apron. Gallows and Mercury jump Big Show and apparently tagging isn’t required here. Show easily throws away the lackeys and palms Mercury by the head, throwing him over the top and onto Gallows. Punk is the only one left now and a few shots to the back easily put him down. Show misses a chop and hits the steps, giving the Society an opening to go after the hand.
The Society pounds away with really basic stuff as we’re just waiting on the comeback. Punk charges into a back elbow and Show cleans house for a bit until Punk hits a high kick to slow him down. Some running knees in the corner stagger the giant before a double DDT from Punk and Mercury gets two. Punk goes nuts on the hand but Show picks him up on his shoulders. After dropping Punk over the top, the lackeys are destroyed again and Show chokeslams Mercury onto Gallows for a double pin.
Rating: D. Another dull match here as Big Show never once felt like he was in any kind of danger at all. That was the problem with this whole feud: Show treated Punk like an annoyance rather than an opponent. This would lead up to the destruction of Punk in a one on one match next month because Big Show needed that push right?
Kane is standing by Undertaker’s casket and talks about getting revenge on Rey Mysterio for attacking Undertaker. Raw World Champion Sheamus comes in and proposes an alliance but Kane wants no part of it. Kane says Sheamus has guts and they’ll be on the floor if he interrupts Kane again. Sheamus is still a heel here and is actually pretty awesome.
Speaking of awesome, here’s Miz to answer Jericho and Edge’s offer from earlier. Miz doesn’t care if the fans want him on the team or not because he’s the missing link in the WWE chain. Earlier today Cena admitted he was wrong about Miz and brags about Bret Hart begging him to be on the team on Raw.
Jericho gave Miz a Fozzy CD but Miz threw it away. Miz’s former partner John Morrison admitted Miz was the HBK of the team, Edge gave him Slim Jims and Truth wrote him a rap. Miz is the future and brags about how much bigger he is than everything else. He actually agrees to be on the team tonight but the fans aren’t allowed to do his catchphrase with him. Cole loses his mind over Miz’s announcement.
We recap Orton vs. Sheamus. There isn’t much to say here as Orton won a three way over Edge and Jericho on Raw to earn the shot. Sheamus won the title at Fatal Fourway with the unintentional assistance of Nexus. Sheamus has been hurting a lot of people lately and he claims Orton is the next victim.
Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton
Orton is challenging if that somehow wasn’t clear. This is during Orton’s bare arms phase which was always a strange look. Cole lets us know that if anyone interferes on Sheamus’ behalf, they’re suspended. If Orton loses, he gets no rematch. Sheamus shoves him into the corner and shouts in his face. It works so well that he does it again, earning him right hands to the face. Orton stomps Sheamus down into the corner and hits a hard clothesline to put him down again.
Orton drops him with another clothesline and a third to send the champion to the floor. The fourth straight clothesline sends Sheamus into the crowd but Orton has to go back inside before the ten count. Back in and Orton hits the circle stomp for two and a catapult into the bottom rope sends Sheamus outside again. The champion FINALLY gets a breather by sending Orton shoulder first into the steps. They’re doing the methodical build here which implies they have a lot of time.
Sheamus takes over with the power brawling via a knee to the ribs and a reverse chinlock. Back up and Orton counters a suplex but the Elevated DDT is countered into a backdrop to the floor. Sheamus rams Orton’s back into the barricade and the look on Orton’s face is great. Back in and a hard ax handle to the head gets two. This is surprisingly good stuff so far which leaves me with little to talk about.
Sheamus grabs something resembling a cross face chicken wing as is the case with most guys who come out of FCW. That’s one of the problems with one training area: you get a lot of the same spots from guys. Orton comes back with kicks to the ribs but another ax handle to the face takes him down. Back to the chicken wing and Sheamus channels his inner Jericho, telling the referee to ask him. Back up and Orton suplexes Sheamus down but can’t follow up.
They slug it out with Orton taking over. The fans are WAY into Randy here. A bad powerslam puts Sheamus down which Cole calls “A malignant growth of momentum.” Lay off the JR metaphors dude. A superplex gets two for Randy but he walks into the Irish Curse (note that at this point, the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) was called the Irish Curse. I’m using the more well known move: the Rock Bottom backbreaker) for two.
The Brogue Kick misses and Sheamus falls to the floor, only to be caught in the Elevated DDT as he comes back inside. The RKO is shoved off for two but Orton escapes the Irish Curse. Brogue Kick is only good for two which is a very rare sight to see. What isn’t a rare sight tonight is a bad finish, much like here as Sheamus gets himself disqualified for a chair shot.
Rating: B-. Bad finish to a good match here. Sheamus is getting better and better which makes you wonder why they book him so badly in present times. The guy is clearly talented but he hasn’t had to really work hard to beat a guy in months. This was a good match though and they clearly have chemistry together.
Post match Orton snaps and kicks Sheamus low before RKOing him onto the announce table. The fans want Miz but get a trailer for John Cena’s new movie instead.
We recap Kane vs. Mysterio. Kane won MITB and cashed in the same night to win the Smackdown Title over Rey. This was at the same time that someone had attacked Undertaker and left him in a “vegetative state” because we can’t say coma in WWE. Kane swore to find who did it but Mysterio accused Kane of doing it himself. Tonight is the rematch and somehow a way for Kane to prove his innocence.
Smackdown World Title: Kane vs. Rey Mysterio
Kane brings out a casket and I think you know where this is going. Kane hits a quick slam to start but Rey avoids an elbow drop. Rey tries to fire off some offense but Kane easily throws him around. The 619 is easily countered and Rey is sent to the floor. He slides back in and hits a quick baseball slide to get an advantage. Back in and Kane punches him off the top rope before ramming Rey back first into the post over and over.
Kane drops him ribs first over the top rope and slaps on a bearhug to keep things slow. Rey forearms out and dropkicks Kane in the chest, only to have Kane clothesline him down on a 619 attempt. Mysterio is sent chest first to the floor and kicked off a springboard to the floor. Kane follows him out but gets caught in a drop toehold into the barricade. Back in and a springboard headbutt to the chest gets two on Kane but he backbreakers Rey down again.
There’s a nice story going here of Rey speeding things up but Kane easily stopping him with power stuff. Power vs. speed is going to work almost every time and it helps that both guys are very talented. Kane bends Rey’s back over his knee before getting two off a side slam. Mysterio manages to break up the top rope clothesline but a rana attempt is easily blocked.
Now the clothesline misses and Mysterio counters another backbreaker into a tilt-a-whirl reverse DDT (here’s a good example of why Matt Striker is annoying. He calls it a Slop Drop, which is another name for a reverse DDT, but come on: does ANYONE think of the Godwinns when they see that move? Is there some Godwinn fan base out there that he’s trying to appeal to? It comes off like him trying to sound smart without adding anything at all). The seated senton puts Kane down and a spinning DDT gets two more.
A hard kick to the face gets the same but Mysterio dives into an uppercut. Kane opens up the casket to show that it’s empty but Rey sends Kane into the ropes. The 619 is caught and Rey is thrown into the casket but he kicks out of danger. Now the 619 connects but Kane gets the feet up on the springboard splash. Rey stops in mid jump though and gets two off a rollup, only to be chokeslammed to death for the pin.
Rating: C. This was about as good as this match could be. At the end of the day, it’s almost impossible to buy Mysterio as a physical threat to a guy the size of Kane. Yeah something like the 619 could stun him but it’s hard to believe anything but that or a rollup is going to get more than a one count. That’s not to say either guy is bad, but it’s the problem with a guy Mysterio’s size.
Post match Kane wants to make Rey pay for what he did to Undertaker. He promises to make Mysterio hurt for eternity and lays him out with two chokeslams and a tombstone. Kane goes to the casket and yep Undertaker is inside. HOW DID HE DO THAT I ASK YOU!!! Taker asks the half dead Rey what happened but Rey says no. The brothers go at it and Kane beats Taker down, I guess turning heel again and shocking no one. The idea is that Taker is still banged up and doesn’t have his full powers back yet.
Video on Axxess.
We recap Nexus vs. Team WWE. I think I’ve covered this well enough but it’s the first season of NXT coming to the main roster to try to take over the company. Over the last few months they’ve attacked various people and tonight it’s about revenge. Great Khali was originally on the team but was taken out by Nexus, leaving Team WWE with just six guys. Team WWE (also called Cena’s Army) is having a lot of problems with Jericho and Edge quitting over Cena’s leadership, only to come back later.
Nexus vs. Team WWE
Nexus: Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, Michael Tarver, David Otunga, Justin Gabriel, Skip Sheffield
Team WWE: John Cena, Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, Edge, R-Truth, John Morrison, ???
You should know most of the Nexus, though Sheffield later changed his name to Ryback. As for Team WWE, Miz isn’t the last man. He comes out but Cena stops him, because it needed to be someone who made his decision earlier. Instead it’s……DANIEL BRYAN! This requires a backstory. The night Nexus debuted, Bryan was a member of the team. However he got fired for choking ring announcer Justin Roberts with a necktie as it wasn’t PG. Tonight is Bryan’s return and he wasn’t a surprise at all. See, WWE.com actually spoiled the return by mistake, ruining it for anyone who saw the website before the match.
It’s a huge brawl to start and Cole RIPS into Bryan for the sake of Miz. Bryan starts with Young and a quick LeBell (YES) Lock makes it 7-6 in less than 45 seconds. Justin Gabriel is in next and gets to fight Chris Jericho for his troubles. Some kicks to the ribs allow for the tag to Truth as things speed up. A suplex into a Stunner is good for two but Gabriel comes back with a spin kick to the face. Off to Tarver who was about as worthless as you could ask for a man to be.
Tarver charges into a boot in the corner and it’s off to Morrison to clean house with some dropkicks. The Fying Chuck (Disaster Kick) sets up Starship Pain (split legged twisting moonsault) for the second elimination. The remaining five members of Nexus hit the floor for a meeting before everything falls apart. Sheffield gets the nod and easily throws Morrison around. A big powerslam puts Morrison down and some snap suplexes work on his back even more. Morrison tries a comeback but Gabriel kicks him in the back of the head, allowing Sheffield to hit a big clothesline for the elimination.
Truth comes in and another clothesline ties the match up maybe twenty seconds later. Jericho comes in but gets sent into the buckle, allowing for the tag off to Barrett. Otunga is in a few seconds later, before he got good in the ring. Now let that one sink in for a minute. Anyway back to Barrett to crank on his NXT mentor’s arms but Jericho gets a boot up in the corner. A clothesline puts both guys down and it’s a double tag to Slater and Hart.
Old Man Bret pounds away on Heath for a few moments and doesn’t look half bad doing it. It doesn’t have the same snap that it used to but Bret’s offense still looks good. He puts on the Sharpshooter but Wade slides in a chair. Bret lets go of the hold and cracks Sheffield over the back in self defense, drawing a DQ. There really wasn’t another way to get rid of him due to an inability to take bumps. Sheffield staggers to his feet and walks into a Codebreaker from Jericho followed by a spear from Edge to tie us up.
To recap it’s Cena, Jericho, Edge and Bryan vs. Gabriel, Barrett, Otunga, Slater. On paper, this should be pure domination. Gabriel is in to face Edge but after scoring some kicks to the chest, Justin walks into an Edge-O-Matic for two. A big spin kick puts Edge down and it’s off to Slater, whose shorter hair makes him look like an even bigger tool than he does today. Slater pulls Edge into the corner for the tag off to Barrett who hooks the chinlock. Edge quickly fights up and scores with a spinwheel kick but gets caught in a swinging neckbreaker.
Back to Otunga who is almost booed out of the building. A standing spinebuster is easily countered into Edge’s Impaler and there’s the tag off to Jericho. Has Cena even been in yet? The running bulldog sets up the Lionsault and the Walls are good for the submission from Otunga. Jericho immediately knocks Slater off the apron and into the announce table to take him down. Back in and the top rope back elbow has Heath reeling but Jericho almost runs into Cena, allowing Slater to hit his running sleeper drop to pin Chris.
Edge comes in to yell at Cena but Slater rams him into John for a rollup pin thirty seconds later. Edge lays out Cena and Jericho adds a few kicks to the ribs of his own. So we have Cena/Bryan vs. Slater/Gabriel/Barrett with Cena getting caught in the Nexus corner. Barrett comes in to pepper Cena with rights and lefts before it’s off to Justin to crank on the arm. Cena tries to fight back but walks into a side slam from Barrett for no cover. John comes back with a quick fisherman’s suplex but Slater breaks up the hot tag attempt.
Cena hits a hard clothesline to put Slater down and dives for the hot tag to Bryan. Daniel comes in with a quick German suplex on Slater as Striker calls for Cattle Mutilation, which means absolutely nothing to most WWE fans. Bryan backflips over Slater in the corner and hits the running clothesline before sending him to the floor for the FLYING HAIRLESS ANIMAL! Back in and Bryan hits the missile dropkick and counters a rollup into the LeBell Lock to get us down to two on two.
Bryan looks at Nexus but here’s Miz to blast him in the back with the MITB case, giving Barrett an easy pin. Gabriel hits a hard right hand in the corner to put Cena down but Cena comes back with his finishing sequence to take Gabriel down. He loads up the AA but Barrett makes a blind tag and breaks it up with a shot to the head.
Nexus stomps away on Cena in the corner and a big boot from Wade sends him to the floor. Gabriel and Barrett peel back the mats at ringside and a DDT on the concrete knocks Cena out cold. Back in and Gabriel misses the 450, allowing Cena to score a quick pin. Barrett comes in and gets caught in the STF out of nowhere for the final elimination 20 seconds later.
Rating: C+. The match was entertaining and never dragged, but the ending doesn’t hold up when you take it out of the moment. Now one thing that does need to be kept in mind is Cena wasn’t in the match until over twenty minutes after the start so he was hardly banged up until the very end. That DDT on the concrete is a bit too much to take though, as Cena goes from out cold to fine in less than a minute. I can’t quite buy that.
This also brings up to the problem with Nexus: they never really won anything. At the end of the day, Barrett was the only one to have any success for a long time and to this day he’s one of two of the seven here to do much of anything. You have Ryback doing pretty well, but the rest are all midcard to lower card guys who haven’t accomplished much. As of August 2013, Tarver is gone, Otunga and Young are lucky to have jobs, Slater is a comedy jobber and Gabriel is a Superstars mainstay. That’s what killed Nexus: at the end of the day, they were a bunch of jobbers who swarmed big names and nothing more.
Overall Rating: D. This is a pretty terrible show with only two matches being decent at all. The main event is pretty good but it’s absolutely nothing worth going out of your way to see. Nexus fizzled out so badly that their existence is really just a big footnote anymore. Bryan wound up being the big star out of all of them and he was literally on the team for one night only. Nexus would go on to do nothing but annoy fans over the next few months, even with new members and Punk as a leader. The show isn’t worth seeing and thankfully things would pick up next year.
Ratings Comparison
Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston
Original: C+
Redo: D+
Melina vs. Alicia Fox
Original: D
Redo: D-
Straight Edge Society vs. Big Show
Original: D+
Redo: D
Randy Orton vs. Sheamus
Original: D+
Redo: B-
Rey Mysterio vs. Kane
Original: C-
Redo: C
Team WWE vs. Nexus
Original: B+
Redo: C+
Overall Rating
Original: B
Redo: D
My goodness what was I thinking?
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Summerslam 2009
Date: August 23, 2009
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,129
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Josh Matthews
Not a lot has changed in the last year other than some names have risen up the card. Jeff Hardy is the Smackdown Champion and is defending tonight against the on fire CM Punk who is now a heel, bragging about how great he is due to being straightedge. We also have Orton vs. Cena #875 although only their second match here at Summerslam. It’s a decent looking card on paper so let’s get to it.
The opening video is set up like a movie theater, but DX takes it over by making shadow puppets on the screen. Shawn wins by putting up Abraham Lincoln. They finally break the projector but Shawn says he can fix it. He turns it into a DX highlight video but breaks the camera one more time.
Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler
Rey is defending after a long but awesome feud with Jericho. Ziggler pounds him down into the corner before getting two off a powerslam. Dolph throws him over his shoulders to the top but Rey bounces off with a moonsault press for two. Out to the floor and a cameraman is taken out via I think a hurricanrana. Back in and Ziggler catches (kind of) a rana off the top in a buckle bomb for two to take over.
We hit the chinlock before Dolph gets two off a side slam. The jumping elbow gets two and it’s back to the chinlock. Back up and Rey drop toeholds him into the corner before, only to have his head taken off by a clothesline for another near fall. A fireman’s carry gutbuster gets two and it’s back to the chinlock. Rey fights up again and hits a hard kick to the head for a near fall of his own. Dolph comes back with a dropkick to take down a flying Mysterio for two more as these covers are getting very hot.
Back up and Rey tries to roll up Ziggler’s body into a sunset flip but Ziggler falls onto him for two. A wicked clothesline gets two more for the challenger but Rey kicks him into 619 position, only to have Ziggler drop to the floor. Back in and the Fameasser gets two for Dolph but Rey gets the same off a sunset flip.
Rey hits a kind of tornado DDT for two more and an armdrag sets up the 619 but Ziggler avoids the springboard splash. Ziggler gets a quick near fall off the miss and the fans are split on who to cheer for. A kick to Rey’s head sends him to the apron so Ziggler loads up a top rope gutbuster, only to have Rey counter into a hurricanrana in mid air to retain the title.
Rating: B+. Excellent opener here with Ziggler being able to go move for move with one of the best high fliers of all time. It was clear that Dolph was going to be a big deal and this was a great example of why. Rey was on fire at this point but he would be derailed by a Wellness violation a few weeks later, forcing him to drop the title to John Morrison.
Jack Swagger and MVP are in the back. Swagger says his match with MVP tonight is a culture clash between the All American American and an ex-con. MVP is nothing but a stepping stone but MVP says he made some bad decisions. Tonight he’s teaching Swagger a lesson and the teacher is an MVP.
Jack Swagger vs. MVP
MVP jumps over Swagger in the corner and hits a quick clothesline for two to start. Swagger rolls to the floor to avoid the Ballin Elbow, only to be caught by a suicide dive. Back in and Swagger gets in some shots to the ribs to take over followed by a forearm to the back. MVP counters another shot with an elbow to the face, only to get caught in an abdominal stretch.
A hard clothesline puts MVP down for two and it’s off to a camel clutch. MVP stands up and breaks the hold with an electric chair for two. This is really basic stuff and the fans aren’t all that thrilled. Back up and MVP pops him in the jaw with a right hand, setting up the Ballin Elbow for two. A big boot in the corner sets up the Playmaker for the pin on Swagger.
Rating: D. The match wasn’t even that bad but it was very dull. Neither guy did anything special out there and it was about six minutes of boring, yet acceptable, wrestling. Swagger would go on to a world title the following year for reasons no one can quite fathom while MVP would do nothing of note for the rest of his WWE run.
Luke Perry is here.
Video on celebrities guest hosting Raw. Did we really have to relive this stupid idea?
Nancy O’Dell from Access Hollywood is here to talk about her ALS charity. No one cares. At all. She interviews Freddy Prinze Jr., one of the recent guest hosts. O’Dell sounds like any other celebrity who has never watched a wrestling show before.
Tag Titles: Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme
Jericho and Show (I can’t stand those combined names) are defending and the belts are unified at this point, meaning the champions have two belts apiece. Jericho says he and Show are the real celebrities here tonight and that’s about it. JTG (how is he still employed in 2013? Seriously, I want an answer to that) starts against Jericho and a nice flip neckbreaker gets two on Chris. A quick Walls attempt is countered and JTG hits a middle rope leg lariat for two.
Todd Grisham: “They bring the right kind of flava eh JR?” JR: “Flava? Like barbecue or cheddar?” Off to Big Show who knocks JTG into the corner and puts on a hard headlock. JTG gets up a pair of boots in the corner before bringing in the much bigger Shad Gaspard. Jericho charges in but gets caught in a gorilla press. The distraction is enough to let Show run Shad over to take control again. A hard chop in the corner puts Shad down and it’s back to the Canadian.
Shad gets in a jawbreaker but Jericho is smart enough to knock JTG to the floor before there’s a hot tag. Show puts on a full nelson but throws Gaspard down to bring Jericho back in. We hit the chinlock before Shad fights up and hits a powerslam to put both guys down. The hot tag brings in JTG but the fans don’t care at all. Everything breaks down and a clothesline sends Shad and Show to the floor. JTG is put in the Walls but makes the rope, only to be knocked out by Big Show to retain the titles.
Rating: C-. The match was ok but I don’t think anyone believed the titles were in jeopardy. Cryme Tyme was a fun team (on occasion) but most of the time they were jobbers to the stars. Jericho and Big Show at least gave the tag titles some fresh life for a few months so I can’t complain about them all that much. The match was standard stuff though.
Punk has a screenplay called the Jeff Hardy Story. In the movie, Jeff survives and beats Punk tonight in the TLC match. That’s as phony as everyone here in LA, where the only real person is Punk himself. Punk goes on a rant against America’s obsession with cool pop culture and says no one makes movies about him because he doesn’t support the Hollywood lifestyle. Punk is FEELING IT here.
Kane vs. Great Khali
Here’s a Wrestlemania rematch that no one was asking for. Kane is the heel here and has attacked Khali’s brother a few times before this. Khali shoves him into the corner to start and throws Kane out to the floor. Back in and Khali clotheslines him down but misses a legdrop, allowing Kane to hit a low dropkick for two. Both guys break up chokeslams and Khali takes over again.
He pounds Kane on the mat for two and hits a hard chop in the corner. Khali charges (and I use that word loosely) into a boot in the corner, allowing Kane to hit the top rope clothesline for two. We hit the chinlock before Khali makes a slow motion comeback and chops Kane down for two. Kane pulls Runjin Singh (Khali’s brother) in and the distraction lets Kane dropkick Khali’s knee. A bad looking DDT is enough for Kane to get the pin.
Rating: D-. Erg why do they keep doing these battles of the giants when they know they’re going to suck? Khali was getting so slow at this point and it was easy to see where the insults about his abilities were coming from. Kane would float around for most of the next year until he saved Undertaker and won the world title as a result.
Slash, Robert Patrick and Maria Menunos are here.
We recap DX vs. Legacy. Rhodes and DiBiase had been destroying HHH for months so he made a call to Shawn. HHH then had to get Shawn out of his job as a short order cook (don’t ask) and tonight is the big reunion match against Legacy.
Legacy vs. D-Generation X
DX comes in on a tank, trailing behind a bunch of soldiers on an Army jeep. Ok points for an AWESOME entrance. HHH starts with DiBiase as Ted fires off right hands in the corner. They have even less effect than you would expect so HHH suplexes him down and drops a knee for two. Off to Cody who walks into the high knee to the face from the Game and slaps Shawn as a result. Shawn gets the tag to a big pop but gets slapped again after running the ropes a bit.
Fed up, Shawn tackles Cody down but gets pounded in the face a few more times. Shawn comes back with a Thesz Press and right hands to another big reaction. The Band is tuned up but Cody bails to the floor and comes back in to a headlock. A belly to back suplex puts Shawn down and it’s off to DiBiase to keep up the punching motif. Ted slams him down to stay on Shawn’s back but Michaels gets a quick neckbreaker for a breather.
The hot tag brings in HHH to clean part of the house but Cody breaks up a Pedigree attempt. Everything breaks down and HHH backdrops Michaels over the top and onto Cody. Ted gets in a cheap shot on HHH to take over, meaning we’re in for a long one here. Legacy takes over o the Game in the corner and the double teaming begins. DiBiase hooks a long chinlock, but HHH keeps fighting to get to Shawn. See how easily that can be done? Instead of just laying on the mat until it was time for the comeback, HHH is constantly moving and trying to keep the fans alive. That’s such a lost art and it’s rather sad.
Anyway HHH suplexes out of the hold but Cody comes in with a DDT to stop the tag to Michaels. Off to a front facelock and of course this time HHH lays on the mat after I praised him for one of the few times after the year 2000. HHH powers out of the hold but DiBiase breaks up another hot tag. You know HHH isn’t going to stand for that for very long so he launches Ted over the top and out to the floor and finally makes the tag to Shawn.
House is really cleaned now with Shawn picking Rhodes apart. The atomic drop sets up the flying forearm but DiBiase breaks up the nipup attempt. Everything breaks down and HHH sends DiBiase into the stands as Cody goes up, only to miss a top rope elbow. Shawn loads up his own elbow but gets crotched down onto the buckle. He can still block a superplex though and now the elbow launches, only to hit Cody’s knee. Shouldn’t that hurt the leg a lot more than Shawn?
There’s no DiBiase to tag so Shawn gets up and puts on a Figure Four, only to have DiBiase make the save. HHH can’t hit a Pedigree as Cody takes him down and actually hits Cross Rhodes on Shawn for two. Now a Pedigree connects on Cody but DiBiase hits Dream Street (cobra clutch slam) on Shaw. HHH and Ted fight on the floor as both guys are down in the ring. Both guys get up at the same time and it’s Sweet Chin Music to knock Cody senseless for the collapsing pin from Shawn.
Rating: B+. Another excellent match here with all four guys working the tag team formula to perfection. Shawn continues to be able to time a comeback like no one ever could and HHH was clicking tonight. Legacy looked great and would actually beat DX in the next month’s match. I was surprised by how well the rookies looked here and DX actually had to sweat a bit here. I wouldn’t say they were in jeopardy but it wasn’t an easy win by any stretch.
ECW Title: Christian vs. William Regal
Christian is defending. Remember Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry going 32 seconds last week? This is a quarter of that as Christian grabs the Killswitch as Regal is taking his robe off for the pin to retain.
Post match Regal’s heavies Vladimir Kozlov and Ezekiel Jackson lay out Christian so Regal can put on the Regal Stretch.
Video on the Summerslam festivities in Los Angeles.
We recap Orton vs. Cena. Orton has dominated the year and Cena is the latest guy to try to take the title. Not much here but do these two really need a backstory?
Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton
Orton is defending. Cena takes him down with a front facelock but Orton counters into a hammerlock. Randy takes him into the corner and kicks at the ribs a bit, cuing a Cena comeback with rights and lefts. Orton comes back with an elbow to the face and his VERY slow stomping. This is the main criticism of Orton around this time: he wrestled in slow motion and it makes for very dull matches. The big knee drop to the chest gets two.
Cena comes back with some right hands but walks into the backbreaker for two. We hit the chinlock and the dueling chants begin. Cena finally powers up and initiates his finishing sequence. The Shuffle connects but Orton escapes the FU into the powerslam (NOT A SCOOP SLAM COLE, YOU STUPID STUPID MAN!) for two. Orton misses a knee drop but Cena’s shoulder block only hits air, sending him out to the floor. The Elevated DDT is good for two as Orton keeps things slow.
Cena gets in another shot and pops up top for the Fameasser, good for two. Orton grabs the ropes to block the FU and a double clothesline puts them both down. They slug it out with Cena taking over and speeding things up, but Orton shoves the referee for the LAME DQ. To be fair though it was the first fast paced thing he did all match.
Lillian, Rhodes Scholar that she is, calls Cena the new champion before saying Vince gave her word that the match restarts and if Orton gets DQ’d again he loses the title. This would be an entirely pointless bit that stopped the match cold. Back in and Orton takes over before whipping Cena into the steps. Orton slams him down and goes to get the title and walk out. We get the same announcement and the match continues again.
Back in and the STF, RKO and FU are all countered and Orton grabs a rollup with his feet on the ropes for the pin. As you might expect, we’re STILL not done as a second referee comes out and tells the first what happened. So on the third restart Cena puts on the STF but a “fan” runs in for a distraction, stopping things cold again. Cena walks around with his hands on his hips but Orton comes in and hits an RKO to retain the title. For real this time.
Rating: D. On top of the INSANE overbooking, the match was really boring with Orton being his usual slow self. These two would feud forever and trade the title back and forth. The matches would get better but people were sick of seeing them fight at the end. This match was a great example of how overthinking can screw up a match. Brett DiBiase was the fan but that was never acknowledged on TV and I don’t think it was ever addressed again.
We recap the main event. This is a pure culture clash with Jeff Hardy being the free spirit and Punk being the serious straightedge guy who lives a very strict life. Punk cashed in MITB against Hardy at Extreme Rules but Jeff won the title back two months later. This gets the music video treatment with a song featuring lyrics of “I don’t want to be like you.” Nice touch.
Smackdown World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. CM Punk
TLC match here. They fight over a lockup to start until Punk takes him into the corner for some knees to the chest. He stomps Hardy down and throws him to the floor before grabbing the first chair. A shot to the ribs and back allows Punk to go up but Hardy makes a quick save. Hardy stomps him down in the corner and hits the slingshot dropkick before going up. This time it’s Punk making the save but Hardy sends him into the ladder to put both guys down.
Back up and Hardy loads up Poetry in Motion but Punk drops him onto the open chair to take over. A series of ladder shots to the back have Hardy in big trouble. Punk sends him to the floor and hits a suicide dive but misses a chair shot. Hardy sends him into the post and gets in a chair shot to the elbow to take over. This is a slower paced match so far which is usually the best way to go about TLC matches. Now Poetry In Motion hits against the barricade and Punk is in trouble.
Hardy puts him on a table but Punk moves before Hardy can splash him through it, sending Hardy down in a big crash. We get another ladder in the ring as JR calls this a carcinogenic match. Punk goes up but Jeff literally jumps over him to go after it himself, only to get caught in an electric chair, only to counter that into a sunset bomb to put both guys down. The champion goes up first but Punk shoves him onto the corner in a SCARY landing with Jeff’s leg hitting the rope.
Punk says on him with a superplex onto the ladder in another cringe inducing landing. Somehow Jeff snaps off a quick Twist of Fate but the Swanton hits knees. Punk hits the running knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered by Hardy throwing Punk over the top and through a table. Jeff starts to climb but Punk is back up to dropkick Hardy off the ladder. They head outside with Punk’s knees being sent into the steps, allowing Hardy to go NUTS on Punk with a chair.
Hardy loads up a table next to the ring and this Punk in the head with part of the announce table and a monitor. A chair shot puts Punk down again as Hardy is in full control. Jeff sets up the big ladder and hits an INSANE Swanton Bomb through Punk through the announce table. That looked NUTS but the crash was great. Both guys are checked on as the stretcher is brought out. Hardy is taken out but Punk is crawling towards the ladder. Jeff gets off the stretcher and goes after Punk, only to be kicked off the ladder in another big crash, giving Punk the title.
Rating: A-. This was an excellent war with a great story being told: Punk played it safe while Hardy lived for the moment and lost the title as a result. The Swanton spot looked amazing and it was the last straw for Hardy as he just couldn’t keep getting up from all these crashes. Awesome match here and a great bit of storytelling.
Punk stands over Hardy with the title in the air and the lights go off. A gong strikes and the lights come up with Undertaker in Hardy’s place. He hits a huge chokeslam on Punk and poses on the stage to end the show.
Overall Rating: B. There’s some bad stuff on here but the good stuff far outweighs it. Its biggest problem is the Orton vs. Cena match which was slow and dull leading up to the STUPID ending. The other big matches delivered though and the opener is excellent. The show is worth watching, but pop in the Cena vs. Orton match from Breaking Point instead. Good show here that could have been a classic with a better Raw Title match.
Ratings Comparison
Dolph Ziggler vs. Rey Mysterio
Original: A-
Redo: B+
Jack Swagger vs. MVP
Original: C
Redo: D
Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme
Original: D+
Redo: C-
Kane vs. Great Khali
Original: D+
Redo: D-
D-Generation X vs. Legacy
Original: A
Redo: B+
William Regal vs. Christian
Original: N/A
Redo: N/A
John Cena vs. Randy Orton
Original: B-
Redo: D
CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy
Original: A
Redo: A-
Overall Rating
Original: A-
Redo: B
The Cena vs. Orton match carries or sinks this show depending on how you look at it.
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Apparently Angelina Love has been granted her release from GFW. I went to get the Tweet for a story about it on Wrestlingrumors and it turns out she’s blocked me. I’ve never spoken/Tweeted to her directly but apparently I must have said something about her that she didn’t care for. I think I’m honored in a way.
Smackdown
Date: March 13, 2003
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz
It’s a big night in Pittsburgh as the hometown boy Kurt Angle is defending the Smackdown World Title against former champion Brock Lesnar. WWE has hyped the heck out of having the Wrestlemania main event two and a half weeks early and that almost guarantees some kind of a screwy finish. Let’s get to it.
A fired up Lesnar arrived earlier in the day, as did a zombie-esque Angle, who is sporting a VERY black eye.
Opening sequence.
Team Angle vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman
Non-title. Kidman shoulders Charlie down to start and there’s an armdrag to Shelton for good measure. Rey gets in a headscissors for two and Shelton isn’t sure how to keep up with Mysterio’s speed. It’s off to Kidman as the Angle vs. Lesnar hype continues. Shelton avoids a charge in the corner and Kidman goes shoulder first into the corner so the champs can take over. Shelton and Charlie take turns on the arm before Benjamin does his jump over Charlie onto Kidman’s back (that really needs a name).
Kidman finally gets in a dropkick and brings in Mysterio to clean house. Rey tries a hurricanrana on Shelton, who shoves him away, right into a moonsault press for two on Haas. Everything breaks down and Kidman easily reverses Charlie’s powerbomb (as you might expect). Shelton is sent outside and the 619 hits Haas. Kidman adds the shooting star press but Shelton gets up for a save. Mysterio is cut off and it’s the superkick into the German suplex to put Kidman away.
Rating: C+. Good action between four talented people, but more importantly it was nice to see Haas and Benjamin FINALLY get a win. I have no idea what the mentality is behind putting titles on people and then have them lose over and over again. A win like this helps, but they need to retain in a big title defense or there’s not much of a point to keeping the belts on them.
Stephanie McMahon is on the phone when Brian Kendrick comes in with some flowers. This goes nowhere.
Jamie Noble went to the Playboy Mansion to yell about Torrie Wilson being in Playboy instead of Nidia. After some plugs for the Girls Gone Wild show, security takes him away.
Chuck Palumbo vs. Rikishi
Rikishi goes after the other Italians and walks into a superkick from Palumbo for an early two. A belly to belly gets the same and it’s time for the required interference from the Italians. Rikishi comes back with some right hands in the corner and the Italians get on the apron. Cue Los Guerreros to take care of them though, allowing Rikishi to hit the Rump Shaker for the pin.
Undertaker finds Nathan Jones in a dark room. Apparently you can’t get the prison out of the wrestler. Undertaker doesn’t care, as long as Jones is ready for Wrestlemania.
A-Train/Big Show vs. Funaki/Tajiri
Big Show BLASTS Funaki with a clothesline at the bell and adds a gorilla press. It’s off to A-Train as Show sits in on commentary. Some kicks stagger A-Train but he knees Tajiri in the ribs to cut that off in a hurry. A dropkick to the knee allows Funaki to hit a springboard dropkick but they can’t drop the big bald. Tajiri’s kick to the face puts A-Train down so Big Show comes back in with the chokeslam. A-Train’s Trainwreck ends Funaki.
Rating: D. Just a squash and unfortunately a good way to show how generic a power team Big Show and A-Train really are. These power battle matches rarely work and I have a bad feeling about what we might be in for at Wrestlemania. The fact that Jones isn’t being allowed to get in the ring suggests a lot of problems and that’s a really bad idea going into the biggest show of the year. As a side note, is there any reason Tajiri and Funaki aren’t a regular team? They’d be fine as a midcard tag act.
We look back at Lesnar beating Heyman last week.
Fans are split on who will win the title match tonight.
Dawn Marie is sad about not being in Playboy. Sean O’Haire comes up and says that she should show off her body tonight by flashing the audience.
Torrie Wilson unveils her Playboy cover by holding up the magazine.
Here’s Dawn to say she has a nice body. She unbuttons her shirt and flashes the announcers, with the top rope covering everything up. Tazz: “THAT’S WHY THEY CALL IT THE MELLON ARENA!”
John Cena talks about being a Viagra triple shot while Brock Lesnar is a limo biscuit.
Los Guerreros vs. Rhyno/Chris Benoit
The winners get Haas and Benjamin for the titles at Wrestlemania. The opening bell never rings as Chavo and Benoit fight over arm control. It’s off to Eddie and the fans seem appreciative of seeing these two together. Therefore it’s off to Rhyno before anything happens and a hard shove sends Eddie sprawling into the corner. For once Chavo actually does better as a snapmare into a basement dropkick has Rhyno in trouble.
Rhyno launches Eddie into the air for a crash to take over again though and it’s back to Benoit for a knee to the ribs. Benoit belly to backs Chavo for two but Eddie comes back in for a good looking dropkick. In a surprising move, Eddie calms Chavo down from getting too involved to prevent a potential DQ. It’s for Wrestlemania after all so that makes sense. Things settle down enough for Chavo to chinlock Benoit as the pace slows.
Tazz talks about dogs and cats for some reason as Chavo does one of the most obvious spot calls I’ve seen in years. Eddie’s slingshot hilo gets two and we hit the armbar. Chavo comes back in and charges straight into a Crossface but he’s too close to the ropes. Benoit rolls outside with him and it’s Eddie diving onto Benoit, followed by Rhyno running Eddie over as we take a break.
Chavo grabbing a Crossface on Benoit (and being pretty bad at it) but Rhyno tags Benoit’s boot to come in for the save. A belly to belly into a chinlock slows Chavo down but he’s right back up with a middle rope dropkick. It’s back to Eddie vs. Benoit with Guerrero winning a slugout and grabbing a hurricanrana. He takes a bit too much time slapping his chest though and Benoit catches him on top, only to get caught in a sunset bomb for two.
Rhyno throws Chavo outside and still manages to break up a small package on Benoit. Chavo comes back in but gets caught in the Crossface, onto to have Eddie break it up with a frog splash. There’s a Gore to Eddie but Chavo hurricanranas him out to the floor. That leaves Benoit to roll some German suplexes on Eddie, who pops right back up with Three Amigos. Benoit will have none of that though and reverses into the Crossface but Eddie gets his hand out, earning himself even more German suplexes….and here’s Team Angle for the no contest after twenty minutes.
Rating: B. They were really starting to roll when the stupid finish happened. If Haas and Benjamin were just going to run in and end the match that way, why did they wait that long to do so? Anyway, Rhyno has fit right back into this show and is a nice power addition to go with the high fliers and technicians. You know this is setting up a triple threat at Wrestlemania and while I’d rather have Benoit do something important on is own, at least he’s in a title match.
We look back at last week with Hulk Hogan and Vince McMahon agreeing to a fight at Wrestlemania. Well at least they were gentlemen about it. For some reason we also have to hear them go on about all their history together, because, again, fans care SO MUCH about lawsuits and wrestlers jumping ship seven years ago.
Stephanie tells Team Angle that they’ll be facing both teams at Wrestlemania.
We get a clip from 1984 of Vince introducing a clip of Hogan beating Iron Sheik for the title, which transitions into a Hogan video package, including several Hogan Wrestlemania moments. That’s it for the fun stuff as we now go to an interview from some DVD of Hogan talking about being the one out there doing all this stuff. Vince threw him the ball and Hogan ran with it. It’s capped off by a clip from 1992 of Vince and Hogan sitting together before Hogan’s “retirement” match where they shake hands and thank each other.
Vince makes us watch the final part two more times and says that’s the only time Hogan ever thanked him for anything. What an ingrate. They used to be the best of friends but then Hogan changed. That change hurt Vince’s family and business which cut him to the bone. That clip wasn’t Hogan saying thank you but rather SCREW YOU VINCE.
We hear about how horrible it was for Hogan to jump to WCW again and Vince reiterates that it’s a fight instead of a match. We go to an extreme closeup as Vince says that after Wrestlemania, he is going to be devastated because Hogan has forced him to kill one of his own creations. For that, he can never forgive Hogan.
Cole says the contract signing for Hogan vs. McMahon is next week in the historic Freedom Hall in Louisville, Kentucky. Freedom Hall is not historic Cole.
Here’s Matt Hardy, who has never locked his keys in his car and hates cleaning his carpet, to issue an open challenge to anyone under 220lbs, save for Mysterio of course.
Matt Hardy vs. Pittsburgh Penguin
Non-title and it’s Brian Kendrick under a mask with a carrot for a nose. Tazz: “So this guy can fly then?” The Penguin tries to speed things up to start and hits a dropkick. Sliced Bread #2 is broken up so it’s a headscissors out of the corner to send Hardy flying. The Ricochet gets two though and Matt stomps away on the back. A tilt-a-whirl slam gets two and there goes the mask, revealing Kendrick in not the best surprise. Kendrick gets two off a facebuster and something like a tornado DDT gets two more. Shannon offers a distraction but Kendrick is able to grab Sliced Bread anyway. That’s enough for Matt as he takes the countout.
Rating: D+. Not terrible and the surprise (as obvious as it was) wasn’t the worst idea in the world. Having Kendrick win via countout makes him look good, though I’m not sure how smart it is to do that to a champion right before the biggest show of the year. Just have him beat Shannon instead as it’s not like that means anything.
After a break, Rey praises Kendrick.
Long recap of Lesnar vs. Angle.
Wrestlemania Moment: Hogan vs. Andre. That works.
Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle
Angle is defending in his hometown. Kurt comes to the ring with his hood up and immediately drops to his knee in the corner with his face against the buckle. Brock jumps him from behind and fires off the shoulders to the back as the hood is still up. The F5 connects but Brock lets him up at two because that’s not Kurt. Cue Team Angle for a distraction so the real Kurt can switch with whoever was in the ring. Angle small packages Brock to retain in maybe 90 seconds.
Kurt bails so Brock hits the F5 into the post on the other Angle, who Tazz recognizes as Kurt’s brother Eric, to end the show. Basically Kurt’s neck was destroyed and he didn’t think he’d be able to do Wrestlemania. This match was going to be a quick title change but Angle opted for surgery after working Wrestlemania because Angle is, shall we say, freaking crazy.
Overall Rating: D. That ending felt straight out of WCW and really brings down the rest of the show. It’s all they were talking about for most of the night and that’s not how you want to wrap up one of the last shows of the year before Wrestlemania. On top of that, the Vince vs. Hogan stuff is getting old in a hurry and the rest of Smackdown’s stuff isn’t all that great. Bad show this week as the main event cuts the legs off what could have been a good, or at least ok, night.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Main Event
Date: August 10, 2017
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Corey Graves
The show heads north of the border this week and there are some options for this show. Monday’s Raw didn’t feature several names and since no one works twice around here, there’s a good chance we could be seeing some bigger names around here. Oh and Curt Hawkins. Never forget Hawkins. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Apollo Crews vs. Curt Hawkins
See, I told you there would be a Hawkins sighting. They pose at each other to start but Crews pops off a dropkick to take over. Hawkins is smart enough to choke on the ropes and grabs a belly to back suplex for two. A regular suplex gets two and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Crews hits a running kick to the face, followed by the enziguri and standing moonsault for two. Hawkins comes back with an enziguri of his own but what looks like a running right hand is countered into the Toss Powerbomb to give Crews the pin at 4:29.
Rating: D+. As usual, the best thing about a Hawkins match is his awesome entrance. It’s a shame that something so funny is being wasted on someone who is nothing but a jobber to the stars. Crews continues to be insanely athletic but he still needs charisma and a character, which is only going to be done so well by Titus International.
From Raw, part one.
We start fast this week as Miz and company are in the ring for MizTV. Miz is tired of being blindsided on his own show so he wants Jason Jordan out here right now. It’s Kurt Angle instead, who has his own guest for the show: Brock Lesnar. The place goes coconuts for Lesnar and Paul Heyman, but Miz cuts Paul off because this is his show. Miz talks about how it’s almost a guarantee that Lesnar is losing the title because all three challengers are going to gang up on Lesnar. And remember, if Brock loses, he’s gone for good. If Miz is a betting man, he’s picking one of the challengers to leave as champion.
It’s time for Heyman to talk and he gets straight to the point: “Do you and your wife ever role play?” Heyman loves the idea of role play so let’s have Miz play Roman Reigns, Bo Dallas play Samoa Joe and Curtis Axel play Braun Strowman. Now let’s preview Summerslam. Three F5’s later, Lesnar calmly leaves.
And the sequel.
Here’s Finn Balor for a chat. After some required TOO SWEET chanting, Balor talks about kicking Bray’s teeth down his neck last week. If there’s one thing Finn knows, it’s that you have to kick fear in the face….and here’s Wyatt to interrupt. Bray appears in the ring but Balor is on the top. They fight for a bit until Bray disappears, only to reappear on screen to say he enjoys Balor’s bravery.
Before the next match, we’re graced with a song from Elias about how horrible Canada is with all of its ugly citizens. Cue a well known Canadian for the save.
Elias vs. Kalisto
Kalisto says he wants to walk with Elias but settles for sending him outside for a hurricanrana off the apron. We take an early break and come back with Elias pulling Kalisto’s arm down onto the apron, earning them both a series of TEN counts. The arm goes into the apron again and it’s time for an armbar.
Kalisto reverses into a rollup for a quick breather but Elias kicks him in the shoulder again. A hammerlock belly to back suplex gets two and we hit the third armbar. An armdrag gets Kalisto out of trouble and he rolls over to kick Elias in the head, only to have the Salida Del Sol reversed into Drift Away for the pin at 10:02.
Rating: D-. It’s hard to find a really bad Main Event match but they pulled it off here. How in the world can you have a ten minute match with three armbars included? Elias is going to be used as something special in WWE though I still have no idea what that’s going to be. Kalisto is a good jobber to the stars, though I still have no idea why he beat Braun Strowman earlier in the year.
Quick look at Bayley’s injury.
Finally from Raw again.
Braun Strowman vs. Roman Reigns
Last Man Standing. Reigns meets him n the aisle but gets thrown from the floor into the ring. It’s too early for a Samoan drop as Strowman pounds Reigns down for an early five count. Reigns is sent outside and we take a break. Back with Strowman throwing the steps inside but Reigns slugs away for a breather. A pair of big boots stagger Strowman and a shot with the steps puts Strowman on a knee.
Reigns hits him in the face with the steps and Strowman goes down, allowing Reigns to hit him in the chest with the steps over and over. Back up at seven and Strowman blocks the Superman Punch by sending Reigns into the corner. That spinning Big Ending gives Braun a breather but Roman gets in a quick Superman Punch to put both guys down. Strowman is back up with a dropkick of all things but he misses a charge and hits the post, knocking him out to the floor.
Reigns gets in the apron dropkick and it’s table time. He takes too long with it though as Strowman clotheslines him down again and sets up the table in the ring. Again it takes too long though and Reigns hits a Samoan drop through the table, only to have Strowman roll outside to get on his feet. Reigns goes after him so Strowman LAUNCHES the timekeeper’s chair at him, knocking Reigns completely silly for nine. Great visual and if Strowman doesn’t win, I have no idea why he didn’t do it there.
They fight into the crowd and up to the announcers’ table with Reigns hitting another running dropkick. Strowman is up again and throws Roman into the screen. The announcers’ table is loaded up but Reigns gets to his feet for two Superman Punches. The spear is blocked with a big boot, only to have Reigns pop back up and hit the spear. Reigns pulls himself up….and Samoa Joe reaches out from the crowd to put Reigns in the Koquina Clutch. The THANK YOU JOE chant starts up and Strowman is up at nine for the win at 22:00.
Rating: B-. This got going once they brought the table in and I REALLY like that ending. Strowman wouldn’t have gotten up without the delay in the count thanks to Joe and Joe himself looks like the real winner, which makes sense considering he wasn’t even on the show so far. It’s not a classic or anything but the ending was the perfect call, outside of MAYBE a double knockout.
Overall Rating: D. Pretty weak show this time around and that’s not the biggest surprise in the world. MizTV was fun, the Last Man Standing match was brutal, the Balor segment was stupid and the original matches ranged from “we’ve seen this before” to a tribute to Chris Jericho’s ARMBAR list. This was one of the worst shows they’ve done in a good while and that’s hard to do for Main Event.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Summerslam 2008
Date: August 17, 2008
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 15,997
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker
For the first time in a few years, it feels like we’ve got a big card tonight. It’s a double main event with Undertaker vs. Edge inside the Cell and Cena vs. Batista for the first time ever. I remember being very fired up for this show when it first aired so hopefully it lives up to the hype after some very lackluster entries the last few years. Let’s get to it.
The theme this year is that this is the ultimate summer blockbuster. I’ve heard worse. This shifts into your standard opening video.
It’s another good song here with Ready to Roll by Jet Black Stare.
We run down the card because you might have ordered the show blind or something?
MVP vs. Jeff Hardy
Jeff is in the middle of the biggest story of his life, as he’s been chasing the world title all year. This resulted in one of the highest number of buys ever for the Rumble, yet he’s opening the show here in a midcard match. Makes sense in WWE world I guess. There isn’t much of a story here other than MVP has been messing with Jeff lately. Hardy starts with two right hands to send MVP to the floor and there’s a whip into the barricade. Back in and a slingshot legdrop gets two for Jeff and we hit the armbar.
MVP makes the ropes and the referee has to keep pulling Jeff out of the corner. Jeff eventually gets free and charges right into a snap belly to belly for two. MVP kicks him in the back and puts on something like a crucifix hold before rolling over into a camel clutch. Off to something like a side leg bar but MVP eventually lets it go. Jeff goes tot he apron but MVP knocks him out of the air to break up a springboard, getting two.
Jeff is put in the Tree of Woe so MVP picks him up and slams the top of his head into the mat. That’s a new one. MVP loads up something like a Gory Bomb but Jeff slips down the back and neckbreakers his way to freedom. The slingshot dropkick in the corner is countered by two feet to Hardy’s chest but Jeff avoids the Drive By kick in the corner. A sunset flip gets two for Jeff and the Whisper in the Wind puts MVP down again. Cue US Champion Shelton Benjamin to distract Hardy from the Swanton, allowing MVP to move. The Drive By kick is good for the pin on Jeff.
Rating: B-. Summerslam almost always has good openers and this is a good example. I never got into MVP like a lot of people did but this was a solid performance from him. Shelton had been involved with this feud as an accessory on Smackdown but it’s not exactly enough of a connection for the run-in here to work. Good match though.
Glamarella (Santino and Beth) is ready for their mixed tag winner take all match with Kofi and Mickie. Santino talks about the unibrow and how the tabloids love the new name for the two of them. Maria, Santino’s ex, is doing the interview so we get a stare down between the girls.
Intercontinental Title/Women’s Title: Glamarella vs. Mickie James/Kofi Kingston
Mickie and Kofi have both belts coming in but the winning team walks out with all the gold. Kofi is still relatively new here and has only won the IC Title once, as opposed to his 89 or so reigns now. The girls get things going with Beth easily overpowering James. Mickie comes back with some quick dropkicks for two before it’s off to Santino. James easily monkey flips him over before it’s off to Kofi for some of his usual stuff. The jumping punches in the corner have Santino on the floor where Beth yells at him.
Kingston loads up a charge but hangs on, only to send Santino jumping into Beth’s arms. Kofi pulls him back in but gets his neck snapped across the top rope for one. Beth beats on Kofi for a bit before bringing Santino back in for his basic offense. A suplex sets up a chinlock but Kofi fights up and butts heads with Santino, allowing for the double tags to the girls. Mickie cleans house and clotheslines Beth down before snapping off her hurricanrana on Beth. Kofi comes in and misses a charge like an idiot but the MickieDT puts Santino down. Beth decks Mickie and hits the Glam Slam for both titles.
Rating: D+. The match was nothing special and could have been on any given Raw. I don’t know of a better way they could have gotten the title on Santino though so you can’t fault the for trying. Kofi would begin his long float in the midcard which would last for the next several years other than a cup of coffee in the upper midcard. The girls looked good here but that’s about it.
Santino gets on Beth’s shoulders to celebrate.
Video on Shawn Michaels’ eye injury. He may not be able to continue wrestling due to the eye and for the first time he’s listening to his doctors. If they tell him it’s too bad, he’s walking away.
Here’s Shawn with his wife for the announcement. Shawn talks about how his doctors have re-evaluated his eye and it looks like he’s going to have to walk away. He remembers his first Summerslam and since then the fans have let him become the Heart Break Kid and Mr. Wrestlemania. He’s also the guy who screwed Bret Hart (wasn’t that Hebner?), the man who formed DX, the man who lost his smile and the man who retired Ric Flair. Now though he can be a full time husband and a full time father…..and here’s Jericho, the man who injured Shawn’s eye.
Jericho, currently an awesome heel rocking a suit, says that he’s not accepting this. Shawn isn’t leaving due to an eye injury on his own terms. He wants Shawn to admit that he’s walking away because of what Jericho did to him and nothing else. Shawn gets serious and says to get out of the ring but Jericho wants to hear that Shawn is leaving because of him. Shawn needs to admit it to his wife, his children, himself and to Jericho. All of Shawn’s accomplishments don’t matter because the epitaph of his career will be that he was forced to walk away because of Chris Jericho.
Shawn says he’ll admit it and tell his wife and kids what Jericho wants to hear on one condition: if Jericho goes home to his wife and kids and tells them that he never could be Shawn Michaels. BURN! Shawn goes to walk away but Jericho swings, only to hit Shawn’s wife, knocking her out cold. What a man that Shawn is, ducking when his wife was behind him. You know it’s on at Unforgiven now and the fans are eating this stuff up. This was the feud of the year in 2008 and there’s no arguing that.
ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Matt Hardy
Matt earned the title by doing something not important enough to explain to us. These two teamed up on ECW with Mark attacking his partner, injuring his ribs. Mark hits a quick forearm to the back but misses a charge, allowing Matt to hit the Twist of Fate, drawing in Henry’s manager Tony Atlas for the DQ 30 seconds in.
Jeff Hardy comes out to make the save and the Hardys suplex Henry.
We recap CM Punk vs. JBL. Punk cashed in the MITB case a few weeks ago on Raw to bring the World Heavyweight Championship to Raw. JBL bullied Punk and called him a footnote in wrestling. It’s a basic story but sometimes that’s the best idea, which is the case here.
Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield
Punk was basically a glorified midcarder at this point but his time would come. JBL shoves Punk into the corner to start and a hard shoulder puts the champion down. Punk comes back with a flying forearm to send him to the outside and a suicide dive fires the fans up even more. Back in and a high cross body gets a one count for Punk but another shoulder block puts him down. Punk tries to go up, only to be taken down by a middle rope fall away slam for two.
JBL goes after the back and we hit the bearhug. This is a basic big guy vs. little guy formula so far but again there’s nothing wrong with that at all. Punk fights out of it as the fans are getting rowdy. We stay on the back as JBL continues his basic power offense. Back to a side grip on Punk’s ribs on the mat before we go old school with an abdominal stretch. Punk fights out and hits the knee in the corner/bulldog combo but the ribs give out on the GTS attempt. JBL takes him back down and drops some elbows for two.
The clothesline misses and Punk starts firing off his strikes, hitting a high kick to the head for two. A springboard clothesline is countered into a powerslam for two and JBL yells at the referee a lot. Another clothesline attempt from JBL is countered with a leg lariat to put both guys down. They hit heads as JBL fell and Punk is busted open from the back of his head. Layfield blocks another knee/bulldog combo by putting Punk on the buckle for a belly to back superplex. There much be something really wrong because Punk pops up and hits a quick GTS to retain. Oh yeah there’s a BIG blood spot from where Punk was laying on the mat.
Rating: C+. This needed a few more minutes but with a legit cut that bad you have to go home in a hurry. Obviously Punk was going to win the entire time so it’s not like the ending was changed that badly. What we did get was good stuff with a basic story that is going to work time after time and did so here.
We recap HHH vs. Great Khali. Again not much to say here: HHH won the Smackdown Title and dominated for a few months until Khali was one of the few challengers he had left. Again it’s your basic hero vs. monster but the question coming in is can HHH Pedigree Khali. He tries for weeks leading up but never could pull it off.
Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali
The Game is defending. HHH is a very tall man in his own right and is probably a foot shorter than Khali. The champion pounds away but has to stick and move to not get killed. That doesn’t blow HHH’s skirt up though so he tries the Pedigree. Khali easily grabs HHH and hits his Punjabi Plunge (two handed chokeslam finisher) but doesn’t cover. Instead he loads up his Vice (head squeeze) but HHH kicks at the long legs to escape. A chop block puts Khali down and out to the floor where his manager Runjin Singh tries to calm him down.
HHH, ever the bright guy, charges at Khali again and is chopped down with ease. Back inside and Khali pounds away with some elbows in the corner to drop the champion. The fans tell Khali that he can’t wrestle as he puts one foot on HHH for a cover. Off to a nerve hold by the challenger followed by a slam and legdrop. Back to the nerve hold for a bit before HHH fights up and hits the facebuster. It doesn’t put Khali on the mat but it does tie him up in the ropes.
Khali will have none of this being in trouble though as he lifts up his boot to kick HHH down before freeing himself from the ropes. Back up and HHH tries the Pedigree again, only to be backdropped out to the floor. A hard chop puts HHH down again and as they come back in there’s the vice grip again. HHH almost breaks the hold but Khali gets it back on for a few more seconds. A charge misses the champion in the corner and he FINALLY hits the Pedigree to retain the title.
Rating: C+. This match, while slow, was a great example of psychology in a wrestling match. HHH knew that there was only one move he could use to hurt Khali and give him a chance for the win so it was the only thing he tried for most of the match. This was HHH working around someone and it worked quite well as HHH is a very talented wrestler, which unfortunately is often forgotten.
We recap Cena vs. Batista. Cena accidentally punched Batista in a tag match on Raw, triggering a brawl between the two. It became exactly what it should have been: a showdown between the two guys who had carried the company for the last three years. This was one of the few dream matches they had built up for years and belonged as a PPV main event. Cena said he had been wanting this match for six years because he just didn’t know if he could beat Batista.
John Cena vs. Batista
Batista shoves Cena back to start before grabbing a headlock. Cena comes back with a quick slam and Batista stops to take a breather. A big clothesline puts Cena down and a Jackhammer gets two. Cena comes right back with a suplex of his own for two but Batista puts him down with a side slam. A quick FU attempt is countered and Batista goes after the leg. Off to a Figure Four on Cena (just like Flair, he puts it on the wrong leg) who can’t power out so we get a rope grab instead for the break.
Back up immediately and Cena throws Batista to the floor in something resembling an FU before collapsing down. Back in again and Cena fires off the shoulder blocks and the ProtoBomb to set up the Shuffle. The FU is countered again and Batista kicks him in the face to put both guys down. Batista drives shoulders into the corner and catches him in the spinebuster to put Cena down. Cena backdrops out of the Batista Bomb and hits a DDT on the leg to set up the STFU. Batista FINALLY crawls over and gets a rope to shock Cena.
Batista gets up and escapes another FU to hook a rear naked choke of all things. Cena fights out of a hold as well, only to get caught by a spear for a VERY close two. They’re in full on main event mode here and it’s getting very awesome. Cena counters a powerslam into an FU but can’t follow up due to exhaustion. It’s finally good for two so Cena goes up with nowhere else to go.
Batista is up as well and they slug it out on top with Batista being knocked to the mat. Cena tries the Fameasser but gets caught in a Batista Bomb…..for two, plus a neck injury that required three months off (I seem to remember that happening earlier but WWE said it was here). Not that it matters as Batista goes into Animal Mode and ENDS Cena with a Batista Bomb for the pin.
Rating: A-. This is exactly what it was supposed to be: the two top guys in the company going to war with only one left standing. It’s a great fight in the vein of Rock vs. Austin from back in the day. Almost no complaints here and it felt like a major match on a major stage. What else can you ask for here?
The Cell is lowered.
We recap Edge vs. Undertaker. They fought for the world title at Wrestlemania with Taker winning the title (duh) before Edge’s wife Vickie Guerrero stripped him of the title for using the Hell’s Gate, which was declared illegal. Edge won the title in a TLC match and Taker left for a bit, but Edge got caught cheating with his wedding planner (Alicia Fox). Vickie reinstated Taker and set up the Cell match here tonight. Edge got Mick Foley to try to find out how to beat Undertaker in the Cell (even though Foley lost) and was told to bring back the Rated R Superstar inside of him. Edge beat up Foley and was back.
Edge vs. Undertaker
It takes two minutes and forty five seconds from Taker’s gong to him slamming the Cell door closed. Edge fires off right hands in the corner but walks into a big boot. We head outside the ring so Edge can be rammed into the steel. A series of headbutts puts Edge down and Taker whips him hard into the steps. Vickie and company (La Familia) is watching in the back.
Back inside now but with steps involved as well. The Snake Eyes drop Edge on the steps but he blocks the big boot and sends Taker into the steps instead. Edge hits a spear to a seated dead man but doesn’t go for a cover. Instead he grabs a table but stops to knock Taker out with the steps to the head. Edge gets another table but doesn’t slide either of them into the ring. The table is set up on the floor instead but Edge has to fight out of a chokeslam attempt instead of sending Taker through it.
Now it’s chair time with Edge dropping Taker again. Here’s a third table but the first one actually brought into the ring. Edge pulls out a ladder as TLCHIAC continues. Another chair shot puts Taker down as we have a ladder, a table and steps in the ring. Three of the four things are used as Edge puts Taker on the table and picks up the chair before climbing the ladder. He drives the dead man through the table in the same spot he used on Foley a few weeks ago. Nice touch.
It’s only good for two though so it’s time for a Conchairto, only to have Taker grab Edge by the throat. Edge breaks free but gets caught in a big right hand to put him back down. A bit boot sends Edge into the cage and Taker crushes his head with the steps for good measure. Edge posts Taker to get a breather and uses the steps as a launching pad to knock Taker through the Cell. Taker’s arm is bleeding a bit.
They fight at the announce table before Edge is sent into the barricade to put him down again. Taker misses a monitor shot to the head, allowing Edge to crack him in the head with it instead. In the big spot of the match, Edge runs the announce tables for a big spear to Undertaker, putting both guys down. Edge can’t follow up so Taker wins a slug out and they head back inside, drawing some moderate booing. Back in and a ladder to the face gives Edge control again and a chair shot gets two.
Taker counters the spear into a chokeslam for a close two and Taker is getting frustrated. The Last Ride is countered by a low blow and an Impaler gets two. Back up and Taker loads up the Last Ride again but wants it through the tables on the floor. Edge slips over the top and hits the spear for a very close two. Now the Last Ride connects but Edge gets out at two.
Taker loads up a tombstone off the steps but Edge counters into an Edge-O-Matic onto the steps for two. Now Edge loads up Old School but Taker crotches him down and chokeslams him through the tables on the floor. Back in and Undertaker spears Edge down and breaks a camera over his head. A Conchairto crushes Edge’s skull and the tombstone finally ends this.
Rating: A. THIS is how you blow off a feud. Edge was completely destroyed at the end here with Undertaker hitting every big move he had and Edge not kicking out of them at all. These two had some great action all year long and the Cell is the best way to blow the whole thing off. Having it as a TLC match inside the Cell was fine and it made for a great main event.
Taker leaves but Edge very slowly gets up. The big man goes back inside and sets up the ladder before lifting Edge onto it. Taker throws in another ladder and climbs up next to Edge so he can throw the Canadian down through the mat. He raises his arms up and lights the hole on fire to end the show in a corny moment.
Overall Rating: A-. This was pretty awesome all around. The opener was good, one match didn’t count, the title matches were both decent to good and the main events both rocked. You could say the tag match wasn’t very good but it’s less than six minutes long and Santino makes it entertaining enough. This is one of the better shows they’ve had in the series and it’s well worth checking out.
Ratings Comparison
MVP vs. Jeff Hardy
Original: B
Redo: B-
Kofi Kingston/Mickie James vs. Glamarella
Original: D
Redo: D+
Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry
Original: N/A
Redo: N/A
CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield
Original: B-
Redo: C+
Great Khali vs. HHH
Original: B+
Redo: C+
Batista vs. John Cena
Original: A
Redo: A-
Edge vs. Undertaker
Original: A-
Redo: A
Overall Rating
Original: A-
Redo: A-
Yep, it’s still great.
Here’s the original idea if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6
Smackdown
Date: September 30, 2005
Location: Laredo Entertainment Center, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz
Welcome back to the “I Have No Idea Why This Was Requested Corner”. This would be coming up on No Mercy 2005 so Eddie Guerrero is chasing Smackdown World Champion Batista. It’s also a pretty forgotten era for Smackdown but things would get shaken up in a hurry due to a horrible tragedy. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Cole gives us a quick travelogue about Laredo, which really isn’t how I expected this to start off.
JBL comes out for a tag match, wearing an inner tube, carrying a Mexican flag, wearing a sombrero and holding a burro on a leash. Naturally he speaks some Spanish and hopes that someone with a Green Card (“If you can find one.”) can translate. He stops to threaten a call to INS to clean out this arena before saying it’s not that he doesn’t like foreigners. We get some insults about Laredo but more importantly, he’s gone to see Mysterio’s family in Mexico.
Everything he’s carrying is from one of the relatives, including an inner tube that belong to 28 of Rey’s closest family members. Now it’s time to get serious though as JBL heads outside and points to the burro, which represents the mouths that people like him have to feed when people come to this country without being able to make a living. The other end of the burro reminds him of the rest of these people, because it makes him sick. There are some great Americans but none have as great of a name as his partner tonight.
John Bradshaw Layfield/Mr. Kennedy vs. Rey Mysterio/Hardcore Holly
Kennedy thinks the burro is Tony Chimmel and insults him as such. He also does his own entrance as we’re over ten minutes into this show and about eight of that has been spent on talking before the match starts. We’re ready to go after a break with Rey doing a Mexican hat dance around the sombrero. Kennedy tries to stand up for Mexican pride but gets legdropped for his efforts.
JBL hits Rey with the inner tube though and Kennedy gets in a cheap shot to take over. It’s off to JBL vs. Holly (He’s the best you can do?) with a suplex getting two on Bradshaw. The announcers start talking about Raw Homecoming this week, which would kick off the start of the Raw vs. Smackdown feud which would dominate the fall. JBL kicks Rey in the ribs though and the beating begins. The 619 is broken up and it’s time to choke with the Mexican flag.
Back in and the fall away slam sends Rey flying and we hit the bearhug, which isn’t something you expect to see from JBL. Kennedy eats the sitout bulldog though and the hot tag brings in Holly to….well about the reaction you would expect off a hot tag to Holly. A full nelson driver plants Kennedy and the dropkick puts JBL down. Kennedy is back up to snap Holly’s throat across the ropes though, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for the pin.
Rating: C. JBL’s promo before the match was great but there’s not much else to brag about on here. That was the case for him a lot of the time though as JBL could often talk his way into a big match but he rarely had the in-ring abilities to back it up, at least at this point. Holly continues to feel completely out of place here and is a great example of how you just can’t take a career lower midcarder, put him way above his pay grade and expect it to work. All I see is the guy who used to be Sparky Plugg or the guy who says he used to call himself the Super Heavyweight and had a bunch of unfunny hardcore matches. It just doesn’t work.
We look back at last week when Eddie Guerrero claimed food poisoning to get out of a tag match where he was to be Batista’s partner. Batista got him a prostate exam but Eddie came in with a frog splash to help beat MNM anyway.
Eddie is eating some Mexican food when Batista comes up. Guerrero promises that they’ll win the Tag Team Titles tonight but Batista takes the food away. Just looking out for his partner’s stomach you see.
Melina was on the phone in the parking lot earlier today when a motorcycle rode by. It was Christy Hemme as a biker (that works very, VERY well) and they get in a shouting match over Christy breaking Melina’s nail.
Melina vs. Christy Hemme
Melina has MNM with her. They lock up to start with Melina backing her up to the ropes for some mouth running. It’s off to an early armbar which keeps Christy in trouble for far longer than an armbar should. A neck snap across the ropes gets a pair of twos with Melina screeching a lot off the kickouts. Christy’s sunset flip out of the corner gets two and she’s all fired up. A kick to the ribs sets up a jackknife cover for two on Melina but Johnny Nitro trips Christy up to give Melina the pin.
Rating: D. This was ALL about showcasing Christy and there’s good reason for that. In addition to being insanely gorgeous and rocking the heck out of her outfits, she had some great charisma and could have been a big deal if she wasn’t so horrible in the ring. Melina was far more polished in the ring of course but she needed someone better to work with.
Melina keeps running her mouth post match so Christy elbows her, only to have MNM come in. The Snapshot is loaded up but the Legion of Doom (Animal and Heidenreich) come in for the save.
We look back at the Ortons holding a funeral for Undertaker’s career. Of course the real Undertaker was in the casket and the beating was on.
Bob Orton Jr. vs. Undertaker
Bob, a Hall of Famer, is only 55 here so this isn’t the biggest stretch in the world. He’s calling out Undertaker tonight because he knows Randy will do the real work at No Mercy. Some early jabs just seem to annoy Undertaker so it’s off to the floor for a breather. Undertaker stares him down so Orton asks for a time out, earning himself a beating in the corner.
The ref is bumped in a hurry though and we’re just waiting on Randy at this point. Orton hits one heck of a low blow (the old guys knew how to do those better than anyone) and here’s Randy to drop some knees. The beating heads to the floor but Undertaker kicks out of Randy’s neckbreaker at two. Randy comes back in but the RKO is countered, followed by a Tombstone to put Bob away (now that the referee has FINALLY come back to life).
Rating: D. Nothing to the match but it helped set up the handicap match at No Mercy. Bob was still able to go out there and look respectable, which is more than a lot of people his age could do. If nothing else Bob is basically a fancy lackey but that’s still a lot better than most people get.
We look at Bobby Lashley debuting last week and squashing Simon Dean.
Bobby Lashley vs. Russell Simpson
Lashley powers him around to start and drives a hard shoulder into the ribs in the corner. A charge misses though and Simpson starts in on the leg. It goes as well as you would expect as Lashley shrugs it off, tosses Russell into the corner and finishes with a Dominator. Squash.
Post match here’s Simon Dean to say Lashley impressed him last week. He offers Lashley a Simon System product to help him get ready for their rematch at No Mercy and Lashley isn’t sure what to think. As confused as he is, he’s able to drop the shake on the floor and stomp on it. What a jerk. Dean goes after him but gets a right hand blocked and a gorilla press out to the floor.
It’s time for Christian’s Peep Show and he’d like to talk about pinning US Champion Chris Benoit a few weeks back. He’s so good that he’s beaten up more people by mistake than Benoit has done on purpose. Cue Booker T. and Sharmell with the latter saying that Booker should be getting the shot at Benoit at No Mercy. Booker reminds Christian that he beat him last week but here’s the eternally worthless Orlando Jordan to interrupt.
See, he should be getting the rematch because Benoit has made fun of him ever since Benoit took the title from him at Summerslam (in about 24 seconds). Jordan brags about Benoit not being able to beat him in thirty seconds last week, which Booker says took him longer to say than it took Benoit to make Jordan tap. Those are fighting words so here’s the Mack Militant to make a triple threat match with Benoit watching and getting to pick his opponent.
Orlando Jordan vs. Booker T. vs. Christian
Joined in progress after a break with Booker cleaning house to start. Christian pulls him to the floor but gets sent into the barricade for his efforts. Jordan goes into the steps, leaving Christian to crank on Booker’s neck back inside. Booker fights to his feet and loads up a superplex, only to have Jordan come in to make it a Tower of Doom for two. A side kick sets up the Spinarooni but Christian avoids the ax kick. Booker loads up a catapult on Christian but gets rolled up to give Jordan the cheap pin.
Rating: D. Jordan is one of those guys who had no reason to be involved in anything significant as he’s just not good. He doesn’t have any special skills, a special look or any special abilities on the microphone. For some reason he was given a midcard push, even when there was no reason whatsoever for that to be the case.
Benoit immediately comes out and says he’s not sure who should get the shot. All three of them are good options but since he’s Benoit, he’ll fight all three of them at once. So yeah, this match really didn’t mean a thing.
Teddy Long and network representative Palmer Cannon (he’s a nobody) are talking about sending Smackdown talent to Monday’s Raw Homecoming. Vince McMahon comes in and asks about their plans for Monday’s show. Teddy lists off some names he has showing up but he doesn’t have a match picked yet. Cannon talks about nothing of note and Vince really doesn’t seem impressed.
Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Legion of Doom vs. Eddie Guerrero/Batista
Animal and Heidenreich are defending and for the life of me I have no idea why this team existed. Like…who in the world thought this needed to be done or that it was a good idea in the slightest? Batista gets one heck of a pop, as was always the case around this time. The bell rings and we go to a break less than fifteen seconds later. I’d love to see who finds that to be a good idea so I can throw sandwiches at them.
Eddie chases Heidenreich around until it’s off to Animal vs. THE Animal. Batista grabs a suplex to start but Animal is up for a standoff. Eddie tags himself in instead but gets punched in the jaw by the now legal Heidenreich. For some reason Eddie tries to kiss Heidenreich’s foot, which earns himself a trip to the corner for a slam from Animal. A side slam gives Heidenreich two as the fans are staying behind Eddie.
We hit a cobra clutch for a bit before Animal gets in a hard powerslam (THUD) for two. Eddie hurricanranas his way out of the Doomsday Device and it’s off to Batista. Everything breaks down and it’s a spinebuster to Heidenreich and the spear to Animal. A not great Batista Bomb gets two on Heidenreich but here’s MNM to go after Animal for the DQ.
Rating: D+. It’s still weird to see Animal teaming with that guy who may or may not have raped Michael Cole at one point. Heidenreich really wasn’t the best in the world but he had a certain odd charm to him. Unfortunately that didn’t translate to the ring, leaving Animal to do most of the work himself, which goes about as well as you would expect. Of course this was more about story building than the wrestling but thank goodness they didn’t change the titles.
Post match Eddie takes a chair away from Nitro but hits Batista by mistake. In classic Eddie, he throws the chair to Mercury and plays dead, earning Mercury a beating to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. Not terrible here but it’s not a good era for Smackdown. Undertaker was transitioning over to his part time status and having him fight Bob Orton isn’t the most thrilling time in the world. Of course none of this is going to matter in a month due to the Eddie tragedy but it was good to see him doing some of his best work just before he left us. It’s not the worst show in the world but there’s nothing to see here.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Lucha Underground
Date: August 9, 2017
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker
It’s time to set the final four in the Cueto Cup as we’ll be having the final two quarterfinal matches tonight. In addition to that though, we’re restarting the process of putting together the Gift of the Gods Title and that means it’s time to find some people to possess the medallions. Let’s get to it.
The opening video of course looks at the tournament so far, plus the Worldwide Underground getting a chance to win three medallions tonight.
Aztec Medallions: Rabbit Tribe vs. Worldwide Underground
The winners all get medallions of course. Before the Worldwide Underground comes out, the Rabbit Tribe (Paul London/Saltador/Mala Suerte) dance around Melissa Santos, who doesn’t seem to mind. Taya and Saltador start with the latter sliding between her legs and shoving her down by the back of her trunks. Ricky Mandel comes in and takes a hurricanrana, followed by a standing moonsault for two.
Taya charges into a clothesline but sends Suerte into the corner. All three members of the Tribe get in the corner for a Bronco Buster because we’ve somehow teleported back to the Attitude Era. Everything breaks down and the Underground is knocked out to the floor, leaving Mandel to get caught in a neckbreaker. London adds a shooting star for the pin and the medallions at 4:36.
Rating: D+. Not long enough to get anywhere but the Tribe’s oddness is starting to grow on me. I get that it’s the idea but for once it’s actually working. It’s also interesting to see the Underground lose as you would have guessed the three of them would make it to the seven way but a bit of a surprise can be a nice thing.
Post break, the Underground’s agent yells at the losing team and says they would be fired if not for Johnny Mundo’s intervention.
Cueto Cup Quarterfinals: Jeremiah Crane vs. Mil Muertes
Muertes jumps him in the aisle and the fight is on in a hurry. Muertes throws him through some boxes and we take a break with no bell. Back with Crane being thrown through a door as Striker says this is going to be a No DQ match. They fight in the balcony above the announcers’ area with Crane being thrown down to a lower balcony as this has been one sided so far. Crane fights back but gets sent into the post for his efforts, followed by going into the apron.
They finally get inside and I guess the match has already started as there’s no bell. Crane is quickly sent back outside and through some empty wooden chairs. Some chops have no effect on Muertes so Crane tries a lap around the ring, only to get cut in half by a spear. Muertes throws some chairs into the ring and a backbreaker puts Crane through them for two.
Crane gets all fired up and hits Muertes in the head with a chair over and over to get a breather. The chair is set over Muertes’ throat and Crane pounds it down with the other chair. Now it’s table time (duh) but Muertes spears him down instead. Muertes drops him face first onto the apron and it seems like it’s time to wrap things up.
Back in and another spear is countered with a guillotine choke but Muertes drops him down for the break. Muertes throws in a table but Crane puts him through it instead for a very close two. Jeremiah goes to the middle rope and dives right into the Flatliner to send Muertes to the semifinals at 10:15 (with the clock starting when they first got into the ring).
Rating: B-. Crane has gotten a huge rub from this tournament and it’s kind of sad to see him eliminated. Muertes is the right choice to go forward though as even though he’s not as dominant as he used to be, there’s always the chance that he could go on a tear and destroy everyone else to win the tournament.
Catrina kisses Crane, who seems to like it. That earns him a hard kick to the head and the villains leave.
An FBI agent comes to see Dario Cueto and says that the Order has chosen him to replace Councilman Delgado. The death seems to be news to Cueto but he’s a bit shaken by the agent’s presence. The agent says he’s a big Pentagon Dark fan but even his skin will burn when the war comes. All that matters is bringing the gods back to power.
Cueto Cup Quarterfinals: The Mack vs. Pentagon Dark
Texano goes right after him and gets two off a leg lariat. Pentagon knocks him outside though and nails a big running kick to the head. A Codebreaker with Pentagon hanging over the ropes gives Texano control again and he sends Pentagon hard into the barricade. Cue Famous B. and Brenda for a distraction, allowing Pentagon to hit back to back Sling Blades.
Texano kicks him down again though, only to charge into a Backstabber out of the corner. Something like an Indian Deathlock has Pentagon in trouble but he’s quickly in the ropes. Texano puts him in the Tree of Woe for a delayed dropkick, followed by a middle rope leg lariat for two. Famous B. tries to throw in a horseshoe but Pentagon takes it away and knocks Texano out for the easy pin at 6:08.
Rating: D+. The Famous B. stuff feels so out of place in the tournament, which is one of the biggest things Lucha Underground has ever done. B. is pure comedy (not exactly funny comedy that is) and that’s not what you should be having with one of the most serious characters in the company.
The semifinals are now set:
Pentagon Dark vs. Mil Muertes
Prince Puma vs. Fenix
Post match Pentagon loads up Texano’s arm but B. calls him out. That earns B. his second broken arm but Pentagon isn’t done. After leaving for a bit, Pentagon comes back to break Brenda’s arm to end the show.
Catrina is meeting Captain Vazquez, who she seems to know. Catrina says the gods don’t fear her and Vazquez talks about the gods using Cage’s gauntlet as a gateway. They both pull out their halves of the medallion and Vazquez says only one man in the Temple can take the gauntlet from Cage. He just so happens to answer to Catrina (Muertes’ name isn’t mentioned but it’s heavily implied), but she points out that without her half of the medallion, Vazquez will no longer be immortal. Catrina says the gods will learn to fear a thousand deaths and leave, after saying goodbye to her mother. Now that’s a twist.
Overall Rating: B-. This show did what it needed to do as we can see the end of the tournament from here. Things have really picked up and now that we have two great matches next week and then the big show, things should start getting back to the point that made this show such a hit. Throw in the storylines FINALLY picking up and this was one of the more entertaining shows they’ve done in a good, long while.
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