This is another big one and something more interesting than several of these. We’ve all seen some bad matches from WWE every single week and it’s always fun to go back and look at what might be the worst of them all. In case you might be a bit slow today, we’re looking at the worst matches of the year in WWE. As usual, these are in no particular order.

1. Brock Lesnar vs. Dean Ambrose – Wrestlemania XXXII

We’re hitting the ground running with a no holds barred street fight between two people who should have been able to beat the heck out of each other. That’s basically what was teased as we came into this match with various hardcore legends giving Ambrose weapons to use, such as a chainsaw and a barbed wire baseball bat. On paper, this had the potential to be one of the best fights of the year.

And it just wasn’t. Lesnar destroyed Ambrose for the majority of the match and unfortunately that was the trend for most of Lesnar’s matches over the year. Ambrose hung around for a good while and had a few hope spots but above all else this was just boring. The aforementioned weapons were brought in but not really used as the chainsaw didn’t work and the barbed wire bad shot missed (of course). One F5 later and Ambrose was done.

This was really just about being boring than bad and that’s not a good thing. The problem with Lesnar was the fact that almost no one was able to do anything to him and he would just disappear for months on end while the loser would be stuck doing nothing. Ambrose was treated like a jobber and then won the World Title a few months later. It’s hard to overlook Ambrose’s complete destruction here though and that’s not a good thing.

2. Carmella vs. Nikki Bella – Tables, Ladders and Chairs

If you want to see why so many people don’t like Bella, this is where you start. The story behind the match was Carmella calling Bella out for being a reality start with everything handed to her and whose whole relationship with John Cena was based on her fame. Instead of taking this as a bunch of insults like they really were, Bella basically said “Yeah, what’s your point?”

A No DQ match was set up and it all fell apart from there. Carmella worked on the knee for most of the match and then Bella just popped up like there was no injury, shrugged off everything Carmella did to her and won clean. In other words: let’s all praise Bella because she’s so amazing and interesting when she treats so many people like they’re beneath her and acts all serious because she’s famous or whatever WWE wants you to buy at this point.

Above all else though, the match wasn’t any good to go along with a horrible story. Carmella could be something special in the division going forward but this is another loss to Bella, who really doesn’t seem phased by all of the insults and rather true statements because she’s famous and therefore above any criticism. That’s not interesting and it’s even worse when the match was horrible.

3. Natalya vs. Charlotte – Payback

You know what’s a bad idea? Pushing a feud over and over long past the point where it stopped being interesting. You know what’s an even worse idea? Having the ending to a match tied back into the Montreal Screwjob, which has been brought up over and over again for years despite it being less interesting and more eye roll inducing every single time it comes up.

Yes, somehow in 2016, we got another Montreal Screwjob finish to a match and they made it even better by tying it into the idea of Charles Robinson being a huge fan of the Flair Family. It felt like a way to back out of a story without actually giving us anything logical or a good idea in general. Charlotte vs. Natalya wasn’t the best story in the world in the first place and then giving us a bad ending made things even worse.

This is a case where the booking brings what could have been a totally fine match down. It’s a stupid decision that feels like a way for WWE to chuckle at themselves and stretch their story out even longer because, for some reason, Sasha Banks wasn’t allowed to face Charlotte until later in the year so we were stuck with something like this. Lucky us indeed.

4. Shane McMahon vs. Undertaker – Wrestlemania XXXII

Let’s get this out of the way right now: McMahon was pretty clearly a replacement after names like Cena and Randy Orton were both left off the card due to injuries. Either of those two against Undertaker inside the Cell would seem like a much better main event level match but this was about as good as we were going to get. Based on that, this match deserves a little bit of a break.

However, that doesn’t make up for the fact that it was one of the worst executed matches I’ve seen WWE put together in a long time. First and foremost, I do not accept that McMahon can give Undertaker a real run for his money, including kicking out of a chokeslam and Last Ride as well as surviving Hell’s Gate. This is the same Undertaker who took Lesnar to the limit just a few months earlier but now he’s having issues with McMahon? Really?

Couple that with the THIRTY MINUTE run time (longer than Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels, Undertake vs. Mankind, Undertaker vs. Lesnar (either time) and Undertaker vs. Edge among other Cell matches) and there was almost no way this was going to work. The big dive, while entertaining, was also terrifying (assuming you ignore the crash pad underneath the table) and not enough to save the match. This should have been fifteen minutes long and a glorified squash rather than a competitive match that lasted twice as long. But hey, you have to fill that six hour run time somehow.

5. Dean Ambrose vs. Chris Jericho – Extreme Rules

Here’s a story about a potted plant named Mitch, who became the plot point of a feud between these two major stars. For some reason Ambrose was given his own talk show to replace the “Highlight Reel” and he brought Mitch in as a decoration. Jericho broke the plant over Ambrose’s head and a huge feud erupted, eventually setting up a cage with weapons match at “Extreme Rules 2016”.

What followed was a nearly thirty minute long match with the weapons barely being used and the plant (one of the weapons included) not being used AT ALL. If there has ever been a match that missed the point worse than this one, it hasn’t happened recently. The match was a watchable brawl at times but the big problem is it was supposed to be all about the violence rather than just some mild brawling.

In a word, this one missed. There’s more to a match than what you do between the bells. You also have to do the things that make sense instead of just doing something that you want to do. The whole point of this match should have been the plant (as ridiculous a premise as that is in the first place) but it wasn’t even touched, despite the fans waiting on it to be picked up at some point. I’m sure that has nothing to do with the fans not being all that into the match at times.

6. Triple H vs. Roman Reigns – Wrestlemania XXXII

This is a match that was doomed from the start. To begin with, the fans really weren’t interested in seeing Reigns in the main event of the biggest show of the year. Making it even worse was Triple H, whose feud with Reigns hadn’t been interesting either and really wasn’t doing anything to make the fans care that much more. On top of that, by the time the match began (counting the pre-show), “Wrestlemania XXXII” had run for about six and a half hours. Think about that for a minute and wonder how tired you would be.

It didn’t help that they then went on to have a twenty seven minute match (not counting Stephanie McMahon’s WAY too long intro with some weird Mad Max theme) which was built around working on the arm instead of the violence and anger that the match needed. It was all about standing around, waiting on the inevitable Reigns spear and pin that the fans were dying to boo. Not exactly main event caliber stuff there.

That’s the part that really brings this down: it was the main event of the biggest show of the year, making it probably the biggest match of the year by default. You can’t go with a match this dull with a bad story after all this horrible buildup and expect it to work in any way. This match was a disaster and neither of the two has really gotten over it in the nine months since it’s taken place.

7. Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar – Summerslam

Again, this one has to do with the stage. This wasn’t some nothing pay per view like “Battleground 2016” or “Fastlane 2016”. No, this was the second biggest show of the year and the main event should be a major deal instead of just some nothing match. The match was even hyped up over a month in advance with Orton being announced as Lesnar’s opponent a full pay per view in advance.

What wound up happening? A squash. Lesnar absolutely flattened Orton, defeating him in less than thirteen minutes with Orton managing a quick RKO and elevated DDT for his lone important offense. Other than that, Lesnar squashed him with a string of German suplexes and F5’s before beating Orton so badly that his head was busted open and the match had to be stopped.

That’s it. That’s how the main event of the second biggest show of the year ended. I don’t know if that bleeding was the planned ending or not but the build towards it certainly wasn’t the most interesting idea in the world. It was even more of Lesnar destroying someone with almost no recourse before walking away. Orton didn’t need to defeat Lesnar here but he should have at least given him a challenge, which wasn’t the case here.

All of these matches have something bad about them but only one of them had the honor of being the main event of the biggest show of the year and that’s enough to make it the worst match of the year. Aside from Reigns spearing Stephanie McMahon, there was nothing here that entertained me. It was a disaster up and down and there’s really no way around that.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 19, 2002
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Summerslam 2002 and there’s actually a big match set up here as the Rock isn’t defending the WWE World Title against HHH. The other question is what Brock Lesnar will be doing to mess with Rock tonight because the Brand Split doesn’t mean anything when we’re close to a major pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Undertaker to get things going. He’s never been one to make his political opinions public but he doesn’t take anything from anyone, just like America. Only in America can a man like him be himself because all he has to do is back it up with his fists. As you might expect, this turns into a rant on the Un-Americans and Test in particular. Sign: “Test Still Works Here?” Anyway, after more AMERICA IS AWESOME stuff, Test comes out on a motorcycle to Undertaker’s music. Test says Undertaker sucks so the fight is on. The Un-Americans run out but Booker T. and Goldust make the save. Booker sets up the six man.

Hardcore Title: Battle Royal

Tommy Dreamer, Johnny the Bull, Bradshaw, Spike Dudley, Crash Holly, Bubba Ray Dudley, Steven Richards, Jeff Hardy, Terri

Bischoff says the 24/7 Rule is done and this is a six minute match with the last person to get a pinfall being the champion. Dreamer is defending and Terri wisely runs away to start. Bradshaw gets in the Clothesline to pin Dreamer and we get a countdown clock for our convenience. The weapons are brought in and a kitchen sink shot to Bradshaw’s head gives Crash the title.

Like most hardcore matches there’s just nothing to talk about here as it’s just a bunch of weapons shots with nothing being built up anywhere. Crash tells Bubba to get the tables and of course goes through one. A kendo stick shot is enough to give Dreamer the title back. Bubba superplexes Tommy for two and everyone hits everyone else as time expires, giving Dreamer the title.

Rating: F. What am I supposed to say here? There’s almost no wrestling involved and it’s for a title no one cares about with Dreamer winding up leaving with the title anyway. The hardcore division died a long time ago and we’ve been stuck watching its dead body walking around for years now. Hopefully this wraps up soon.

Kane’s music hits and HIS PATH IS CHOSEN.

Stacy and Trish are catty to each other about various sexual escapades of the past. Bischoff comes in and says they’re here for sex appeal. Instead of a match, it’s going to be a bra and panties match in the mud.

Trish Stratus vs. Stacy Keibler

They’re in underwear and fighting in a mud pit. Trish is launched into the mud and Charles Robinson is pulled in with her. I’m not going to waste your time here so we’ll just skip to Trish winning off a rollup outside the pit.

Fink gets thrown into the mud as well.

Rock arrives and is given a package from Paul Heyman. After some Rogaine jokes and an introduction to the production woman who gives her the package (“How you doing? Dwayne Johnson. Good to meet you.”), Rock finds a bunch of pictures of a bloody Hulk Hogan as the mind games continue.

Here’s HHH with a clipboard for a chat. HHH isn’t going to fight Shawn at Summerslam until Michaels signs a release to prevent any legal liabilities. As for tonight though, Brock Lesnar needs to be paying attention to what happens to the Rock. Tonight’s match will be No DQ so Rock is getting softened up for Sunday. After that, HHH is coming for Lesnar and the title.

Chris Jericho of all people cuts this off (Where was he five minutes ago?) to say they have a lot in common. First of all, they both hate each other. Well at least there’s some continuity. As for Summerslam, they’re both fighting people WAY past their primes…and here’s Flair to attack Jericho with a trashcan.

Booker T./Goldust/Undertaker vs. Un-Americans

So it’s Texas vs. Canada. It’s a brawl on the floor until Christian and Undertaker start for a rather odd pairing. That switches over to the much more normal Christian vs. Booker and as you might expect, some Canadian cheating puts Booker in trouble. Christian rams him into the mat a few times before it’s back to Test for a chinlock. The pumphandle slam doesn’t work and a side kick puts Test down.

Goldust comes in and cleans house with the usual, including ten right hands to Christian in the corner. Of course that sets up Shattered Dreams with Undertaker running interference so the referee doesn’t see it. A clothesline puts Test on the floor and there’s the chokeslam to Storm. As the big guys fight outside, a Tag Team Title is brought in and Christian knocks Goldust silly for the pin.

Rating: C+. Not a bad match here actually though the ending was a bit messy. The other problem here of course is having Test vs. Undertaker which should be little more than a squash that doesn’t break five minutes. The Tag Team Title match should be fun though, especially if Booker and Goldust get to talk a bit more beforehand.

Video on Rock training, which is certainly for a match and not for a movie.

Bischoff gives Van Dam a pep talk when Big Show comes up to ask why he didn’t get the title shot. Van Dam: “Maybe because you’re a tool?” Show: “I’m a giant!” Van Dam: “Ok, you’re a giant tool.” Bischoff makes a match between them for later but doesn’t want Van Dam getting hurt. The title match is NOT on the line.

Flair says his announcement from three weeks ago is on hold because he’s ready for Jericho on Sunday. Cue Jericho to attack him with the trashcan again.

Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam fires off the kicks to start and knocks Big Show outside for even more of them because he doesn’t have much else to use on a giant. Show sends him into the steps and then throws the steps back inside. A chokeslam plants Van Dam and Show loads up the steps, only to have Bischoff send in Jamal and Rosey for the DQ.

Show is beaten down as you would expect.

Rock knows tonight is a No DQ match and sure HHH has beaten him before. He’s beaten HHH before too though, all the way back to when they were babies and HHH diaper was that censored wet. They were fighting back in the colonial days and the caveman days before that. That’s not exactly funny.

Anyway, Coach has a video tape from Paul Heyman, which Rock thinks is Heyman on a beach without anything on. For some reason he agrees to let it be shown and it’s a Lesnar highlight video. Rock agrees that Lesnar is great but the fact is very simple: Rock is walking out as champion. This was longer than a lot of Rock’s usual stuff but it was a good combination of comedy (albeit not funny comedy) and intense, which is the right balance.

HHH goes in to Bischoff’s office because Eric has received the fax from Shawn, who has agreed to wave the right to sue HHH. The match is officially unsanctioned and this takes WAY longer than it needs to.

Fozzy performs To Kill a Stranger with Lawler talking about how awesome they are the whole way through. After the song, Jericho rips on the Norfolk fans and offers to play another song, only to have a bloody Flair come in and clean house. Various guitars are broken and Summerslam is set up.

Rock is getting ready and ignores a phone call.

In the arena, Lesnar and Heyman arrive and of course it’s Paul calling Rock.

After a break, Bischoff has security guarding Heyman and Lesnar.

The Rock vs. HHH

Non-title, No DQ and for the last time ever. HHH tells Rock to just bring it and that means a bunch of right hands to the face. Rock knocks him over the top and a big clothesline in front of the additional security puts HHH down again. Back in and a cheap shot lets HHH take over and it’s time to start the slow offense. We hit the abdominal stretch as JR tries to make it seem like the most important hold in wrestling history. It doesn’t last all that long (shocking) so a double clothesline puts both guys down.

The spinebuster sets up the People’s Elbow but the bad ribs mean it’s a delayed two. HHH takes it back outside and sends Rock into the steps so it can be sledgehammer time. The referee gets decked (cue the no contest) but here’s Shawn to go after HHH. Brock takes Sweet Chin Music and goes out into the crowd. Rock gives chase and HHH brawls with Shawn to end the show.

Rating: C. Rock vs. HHH is always going to be worth a look even if they have the two angles being built up instead of really going anywhere. That’s not exactly surprising but given how this show has been all over the place, you kind of had to expect it. I’m not sold on having the same ticket buying idea two weeks in a row but at least they’re building something up.

Overall Rating: D+. Some of the wrestling helps a bit here but that first hour with the mud and the hardcore stuff was just a mess. Summerslam is getting stronger every day but it’s going to take a special performance to make the show into a good night. Rock vs. Lesnar and HHH vs. Shawn have my interest though and that’s the best thing that can happen with a big show like this.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: January 17, 2017
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

I know I say this every week but it’s a stacked show again with Alexa Bliss defending the Women’s Title against Becky Lynch in a cage match to prevent interference from La Luchadora. Other than that we have the King’s Court with Jerry Lawler and Shane McMahon opening the show with a major announcement. Let’s get to it.

Quick preview of tonight’s show.

Here’s Shane to get us going with his major announcement. He gets straight to the point: in four weeks, the Smackdown World Title will be defended inside the Elimination Chamber with the winner going on to “Wrestlemania XXXIII” for the big title defense. This brings out champion AJ Styles to say that Shane is ruining Smackdown. Styles threatens to take the title back to Japan instead of fighting inside the Chamber but Shane brings up the idea that Cena will tie Ric Flair’s record at the Rumble.

Cue Cena but Styles cuts him off because Cena doesn’t get to say anything when his brother in law hands him title shots. This brings out the Miz and Maryse with Miz saying this is his time to kick 2017 off as only he can. Miz makes fun of the normal things people make fun of AJ for (Cena: “Sounds like he’s trying to get to you AJ.”) so Styles says Miz probably wrestles with a limp. AJ: “We can ask Maryse about that.” Cena: “OOOOOOH!!!!” Cena gets them riled up enough to make the match happen next.

Back from a break with Shane running into Dean Ambrose, who wants in the Chamber. They’ll talk about that later though because Dean wants a new belt which doesn’t smell like cocoa butter. Shane can’t do that but he’ll give Dean the opponent he wants tonight: Randy Orton.

AJ Styles vs. The Miz

Non-title with Cena on commentary. They actually fight over a test of strength to start until AJ does the drop down into the dropkick so he can pose at Cena. A knee to the ribs cuts AJ off but he gets in a low Phenomenal Forearm. Maryse offers a distraction though and AJ gets kicked to the floor as we take a break. Back with Miz escaping the Styles Clash and hitting a snap DDT for two. Styles heads to the floor and gets into it with Cena, drawing the DQ at 10:45.

Rating: B-. This was good while it lasted and the ending was just about the only way they could go. You can almost guarantee that all three will be inside the Chamber and that’s a good thing. I’m not sure who comes out of the next three pay per views with the title but it could make for some interesting stories.

Cena lays both of them out and holds up the title.

Here’s Nikki Bella to call out Natalya, who is in the crowd for some reason. Natalya has something for us to see and goes back through the curtain to a conveniently placed merchandise stand. Natalya rants about how Nikki and Cena’s merchandise is next to each other. Why isn’t there a Natalya shirt there when there’s a Bret Hart shirt? It’s appropriate though because Nikki and Bret are going to die old and alone. Nikki FINALLY gets back there for the pull apart brawl.

Alexa Bliss is ready for the cage match.

Kurt Angle Hall of Fame video.

Dean Ambrose vs. Randy Orton

Non-title. Dean starts fast and slugs Orton down to the floor, giving us the big staredown from the middle rope. Back in and Ambrose headlocks him down, only to get draped ribs first across the top rope. The Wyatts suggest keeping it at Orton’s pace as he grabs a chinlock to keep things slow. Orton gets bored of the slow pace and sends Dean outside for a trip over the announcers’ table.

Back from a break with Ambrose fighting out of another chinlock and hitting a running forearm. Neither finisher can hit and the rebound lariat gets two for Dean. The elevated DDT is broken up so Dean can dive onto Harper but the distraction lets Orton get in the DDT. For reasons of storyline convenience, Harper gets on the apron and the distraction sets up the rollup pin on Orton at 13:42.

Rating: B. I’m looking forward to where this is going though I’m not sure who winds up turning out of all this. I can’t imagine Harper as a face no matter what but I’m not sure where that leaves Wyatt and Orton, as you would expect to see them fight at Wrestlemania. You can almost guarantee they’re both in the Chamber though and that’s a fine way to go.

Post match Orton and Harper go at it with Bray trying to break it up. Luke lunges at Orton again and Bray hits Harper in the face. Bray tells Orton to bring it on and the fans want the RKO. That goes nowhere though as Harper walks away while pointing at Orton.

Becky Lynch knows she’s never run from a fight and she knows who she is.

Here’s Jerry Lawler for the King’s Court. After saying he’s glad to be back, here’s Dolph Ziggler as his guest. Dolph doesn’t say anything as Lawler asks about the recent change in personality. Ziggler is one of Lawler’s favorites but the star is fading as much as the bleach in his hair. We see a clip of last week’s loss to Kalisto and Dolph’s subsequent attack with a chair. Ziggler still has nothing to say and starts to leave but Lawler wants to know what’s going on.

Dolph wants to know why Lawler agreed to do this and has his own footage. This clip is the series of elbow drops that might have caused Lawler’s heart attack back in September 2012. Ziggler says that was on purpose and if Lawler doesn’t stop with the questions, he’ll finish what he started. Lawler asks his last question: how does it feel to always be a loser? That earns him a superkick to the chest and JBL actually gets in the ring to check on Jerry. Ziggler turns down an offer to come back and fight Lawler.

Bray Wyatt says the entire Family is in the Royal Rumble. Next week though it’s Orton vs. Harper and no matter who wins, the Family will be stronger.

Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is challenging and this is inside a steel cage. They go at it to start with both of them climbing the cage at the same time. That goes nowhere so Bliss sends her into the steel a few times, only to have Becky drop her face first onto the top turnbuckle. We take a break and come back with Lynch in trouble as Alexa stomps her against the cage.

Bliss’ charge hits the steel though and Becky gets to the top, only to have a quick charge make the save. That goes badly for the champ as well though as Becky gets in a super Bexploder for a very close two. Becky goes for the door but here’s La Luchadora to block the way. A kick to the head sets up Bliss’ DDT for the pin to retain at 9:43.

Rating: B-. Not great here but at least we had a good match in the process. The ending was pretty easy to guess but it’s still really cool to see the women main event a show like it’s no big deal anymore. In years past, this would be near the biggest moment ever in women’s wrestling but instead it’s just something that happened.

Post match the beatdown continues until Becky fights back and unmasks La Luchadora as…..Mickie James. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Overall Rating: B-. I had a good time with this show even if it felt a little emptier than usual. Three matches isn’t exactly a high amount but the key thing here is how important everything seems. No matter what is going on at the time, that is all that matters right then and there. It could be Nikki and Natalya arguing or something over the World Title but it’s important and treated as such. That’s SUCH a big difference over Raw and it helps to no end.

Results

AJ Styles b. The Miz via DQ when John Cena interfered

Dean Ambrose b. Randy Orton – Rollup

Alexa Bliss b. Becky Lynch – DDT

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Royal Rumble 2005
Date: January 30, 2005
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz

It’s time for a new set of guys to take their place on top of the company and what better time to do that than at the Rumble? Other than the Rumble, we’ve got the final blowoff of Orton vs. HHH in a feud that still makes me shake my head to this day. Also it’s Big Show vs. JBL vs. Angle for the Smackdown Title in a match that sounds so uninteresting I’d rather watch last year’s show all over again. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is designed like a clock counting down in the Rumble. Cool idea there.

I almost forgot: this is the West Side Rumble, which is actually designed on a theme of West Side Story, as in gangs of Raw and Smackdown guys snapping their fingers and singing. Remember that THIS was considered the best idea and that someone received a paycheck for doing this. Let that sink in when you’re unemployed next time.

Edge vs. Shawn Michaels

Edge is mad that he didn’t get the title shot at Taboo Tuesday and is finally turning heel, which he would be for years to come. Edge jumps Shawn before Shawn can take off his vest, only to get sent back to the floor by Shawn. Back in and Shawn chops away in the corner but Edge comes back with a swinging neckbreaker to take over. Edge is embracing the evil here and pokes Shawn in the eye but it only ticks Shawn off, resulting in a Thesz Press by Shawn.

The Canadian is sent back to the floor but he catches Shawn in an Edge-O-Matic to take over again. A baseball slide keeps Shawn down and we head back inside. The fans are firmly behind Shawn here, which means the heel turn is working for Edge. Shawn tries a standing rana but gets caught in a powerbomb for two instead. Off to a rear naked choke from Edge which stays on for a good while.

As Shawn fights up, Edge slams him right back down to stop the comeback before doing Shawn’s pose. Shawn gets guillotined on the top but Edge jumps into a punch to the ribs for two. Shawn counters a belly to back suplex into a cross body for two but Edge clotheslines him right back down. We hit the chinlock again although for far less time here. Michaels comes back with an atomic drop and they mistime something pretty badly with Shawn waiting on one side of the ring while Edge stumbles around on the other side.

Anyway Shawn pounds away in the corner and grabs a rollup for two, prompting Edge to try to walk out. The imbecile of a referee holds Shawn back, allowing Edge to sneak up from behind and spear Shawn to the floor. Shawn finally crawls back in and Edge dances a bit. Edge tunes up the band and spears Shawn down for two more, sending Edge into a fit. He pulls his own hair out and does those awesome facials that only Edge can do.

With nothing else to try, Edge puts Shawn on top for a superplex, only to get knocked down for the flying elbow from Shawn. Sweet Chin Music is countered into an electric chair drop for two more and Edge is very frustrated. Edge rolls through a sunset flip into the Edgeucator (imagine a Sharpshooter but with Edge behind Shawn like an ankle lock) but Shawn makes the rope. After a small package gets two for Shawn, Edge reverses a rollup into one of his own and grabs the ropes for the cheap pin.

Rating: B-. Decent match here but at nearly 20 minutes it’s too long. I’m not sure if I like the ending or not either, as Edge cheating shows that he’s embracing the heel turn, but I don’t think cheating and then hitting a move like another spear would have been a bad choice either. Still though, solid way to further Edge’s turn and a very long opener, which isn’t a terrible idea.

Teddy and Eric banter about who is going to win. Apparently we’re doing the old school tumbler thing to draw numbers with. Flair and Eddie come in (Flair hits on Torrie of course) to draw and Flair is very happy with his number. Eddie is disappointed, so he picks Flair’s pocket and steals his number. See, THIS is the kind of stuff we need more of. It enforces Eddie’s character and is funny at the same time, unlike the stupid stuff we get today that doesn’t help anyone.

Heidenreich is panicking about caskets when Snitsky comes up. Heavy breathing ensues and Snitsky says he has an idea.

We recap Heidenreich vs. Undertaker. Basically Heidenreich wants to replace Undertaker is his chance in a casket match. Most people didn’t think much of Heidenreich and they would wind up being proven correct. He would be followed by Great Khali in the long line of strange guys to face Undertaker.

The casket is brought out.

Undertaker vs. Heidenreich

Taker grabs a headlock to start and pulls Heidenreich towards the casket but (Jon) Heidenreich runs away. That works so well that we do it again and Jon is terrified. Since that didn’t quite work, Taker hooks the leg with a half crab, causing Heidenreich to crawl towards the ropes in front of the casket. As we ignore the problem of crawling to the ropes, Jon bails to the floor to take the fight out there.

Heidenreich sends Taker into the casket and pounds his head into it, which apparently isn’t a problem for him. Back in and Heidenreich pounds away in the corner, only to get caught in a modified triangle choke. Taker pulls the hold down to the mat and Heidenreich is almost out, so here’s Snitsky to break up the hold. After a double suplex to Taker, the monsters start pulling him to the casket…..which has Kane inside.

Kane, who was feuding with Snitsky over Snitsky punting a plastic version of the baby that Kane’s wife Lita (just go with it) lost, destroys both guys and takes Snitsky into the crowd. Heidenreich starts shoving the casket away very slowly before slamming Taker into the steps. Heidenreich slides the casket into Taker, which looks rather stupid as Taker had nothing behind him to be crushed against but whatever.

Back in and Jon puts on a cobra clutch which chokes Taker out enough to get him into the casket. Well mostly in at least as Taker sticks an arm out and chokes away. With Heidenreich’s torso in the casket, Taker drops the apron legdrop in the spot of the match. Back in and Heidenreich is suddenly fine, pounding away on the Dead Man and hitting a Boss Man Slam for a cover. Taker chokes his way out of the casket and wins a slugout, followed by a bad running DDT. Chokeslam and tombstone hit and we’re done.

Rating: D. This just didn’t work. At the end of the day, Heidenreich just didn’t work at all and he never came close to it. This was supposed to be a preview of Snitsky/Heidenreich vs. Kane/Taker at Mania, but thankfully they went with Kane in MITB and Taker vs. Orton in a great match, whereas Snitsky and Heidenreich didn’t even make it onto the show.

Teddy yells at Eddie to get Flair’s number back. Evolution comes in and a beatdown nearly ensues. Eddie has to give the number back, and he throws in Flair’s wallet too. Batista is going to go draw for the Rumble but HHH wants to talk about the match with Orton. Tensions flare but Flair calms things down. I think I smell a showdown.

Christian is here to draw his number and he’s well pleased. Cena shows up and hits on Christy but Christian isn’t pleased. He says rapping isn’t hard and challenges Cena to a battle rap. Tomko won’t give Christian a beat so he has to go it alone. Christian actually rhymes a bit but can’t rhyme charisma. Cena makes gay jokes and isn’t nearly as funny as Christian.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Big Show vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

This match has a backstory that isn’t important enough to explain to us. Apparently Angle had a last man standing match with JBL but the winner is even less important than the backstory. JBL is defending. Angle bails to the floor to start so Show runs over JBL a few times. There’s the loud chop in the corner followed by a legdrop which finally draws Angle into the ring for a save.

Now it’s Kurt getting a big chop in the corner. Cole says that’s like getting hit in the chest with a skillet. My question continues to be: how does anyone know what that feels like? Is that what goes on at WWE headquarters when there aren’t any shows on? Show clotheslines both guys to the floor to a surprisingly big reaction. Angle tries a German on the floor which fails completely, so Show picks up the steps.

Show loads up the announce table and climbs the steps to chokeslam JBL through said table. Before he can though, Angle hits Show low and blasts him with a monitor, knocking Show through the table. Back inside and Angle puts JBL in an armbar followed by a keylock. Kurt rolls the Germans but walks into a big boot for two. Big Show gets back in and there’s a double clothesline and headbutts all around. He slams Angle onto JBL to a big reaction. When did Big Show get this popular? Both guys get crushed in the corner and another double clothesline puts both guys down.

Show loads up a double chokeslam but the other guys go High/Low to take Show down. Angle Germans JBL down and hits a bad Angle Slam which gives JBL two. There’s a chokeslam to JBL but he gets a foot on the rope. Out to the floor and Show spears JBL through the barricade in his signature spot, putting all three guys down.

Back in and Angle goes after Show with a chair but gets flapjacked face first onto the steel. Mark Jindrak and Luther Reigns, Angle’s lackeys, come out for the save as JBL’s Cabinet try to wake up the champion. Show beats up Jindrak and Reigns as Orlando Jordan puts JBL in the ring for the Clothesline to pin Angle to retain.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches I was expecting to suck but it wound up being pretty solid. Angle is going to be good no matter what he does and Show had some solid motivation out there for a change. JBL escaping with the title was a recurring theme for nearly a year until he ran into a buzzsaw called John Cena in a few months. Shockingly good match here.

Batista won’t sign Carlito’s petition to get rid of Teddy Long. Carlito loads up the apple, looks at Batista, and swallows. Funny bit.

Batista goes to draw his number and hears Bischoff bar Evolution from ringside for the next match. Big Dave seems very happy to tell HHH.

Long video recapping HHH vs. Orton. They hate each other, Orton was never supposed to get another shot, so tonight he gets another shot.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH is defending. This is when Orton was still young and a not quite plucky face. He punches Orton to the floor and gets two off a dropkick back inside. HHH pounds away in the corner but gets caught in Snake Eyes to stop him cold again. Orton tries the RKO again but gets dumped to the floor, which thankfully doesn’t break his shoulder again. HHH sends him into the steps and heads back in for some knees to Orton’s back.

The Game goes after the taped up knee and wraps it around the post because he can. HHH modifies the cannonball down onto the leg by dropping an elbow instead of sitting on it. After a quick attempt at a small package by Orton, HHH puts on a LONG Figure Four, lasting way longer than almost any other I can remember. Orton finally turns it over, sending HHH retreating to the floor.

Orton sends him over the announce table and pounds away before heading back in for his backbreaker. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Orton as does a regular one. The powerslam by Orton gets two as he doesn’t seem interested in selling the knee at all. HHH counters punching in the corner into an atomic drop to slow things down again. HHH goes up top for no apparent reason and gets armdragged down, allowing Orton to hit a top rope cross body (his old finisher) for two.

Orton counters a Pedigree attempt into a catapult but HHH counters the RKO for at least the third time before hitting the high knee for two. Randy is bleeding from the lip. The Pedigree is escaped again and Orton gets two off a clothesline. The champ rolls to the floor again and gets sent into the steps for trying to hide. Back in and Orton pounds away in the corner, only to miss a DDT attempt and possibly give himself a concussion.

The referee looks at Orton to stall even more, as I think they’re going for some big emotional moment where Orton fights through adversity. HHH charges at Orton and knocks out the referee at the same time. It’s hammer time but HHH misses his charge and hits the post. Back inside and Orton gets the hammer, only to have his head taken off by a clothesline. HHH throws away the hammer and hits the Pedigree to retain.

Rating: D+. As usual, these two do not work well together at all. This was one of their worse matches too, as Orton never seemed to have HHH even remotely in danger at all. At the end, HHH had Orton dead to rites for a long time and won clean (he never used the hammer) with a Pedigree. Orton’s face push was killed dead here so he had to turn heel and feud with the Undertaker soon after this. Not a good match and kind of headscratching booking.

Angle literally steals Nunzio’s number and spot in the Rumble.

Teddy tells JBL and company that Jibbles has to defend the title against Big Show in a barbed wire steel cage match at No Way Out.

Royal Rumble

Eddie Guerrero is #1 and Benoit is #2. Dang Benoit is on a run of bad luck in these things. I think we’ve got 90 second intervals again here. Feeling out process to start and they get into a technical standoff of course. Eddie hooks one of the few chinlocks in Rumble history until Daniel Puder, the winner of Tough Enough 4 (beating Mike MIZanin in the finals) is #3. He gets on the mic and says that he’ll be the first Tough Enough Champion to win the Rumble, drawing “are you serious” glares from Benoit and Eddie.

Benoit and Eddie fire off chops in the corner followed by a double suplex because they can. Eddie hits Three Amigos and Hardcore Holly is #4. Holly asks if he can have some fun with Puder and rips some skin off with chops in the corner. Benoit and Eddie get in some chops of their own before Holly kicks Puder low, hits the Alabama Slam, and throws him out. Hurricane is #5 as Guerrero and Benoit dump Holly.

Hurricane gets double teamed but Eddie tries a double cross, only to get chopped for his efforts. Hurricane hits a Blockbuster on Eddie but Benoit chops him down and whips him into Eddie for the elimination. Kenzo Suzuki (one of the most forgettable footnotes in wrestling history) is #6. Just like everyone else, Benoit and Eddie pound on him in the corner with chops and suplexes, but Benoit turns on Eddie ala earlier but only throws him to the apron.

Edge is #7 to a BIG pop. He beats on everyone in sight but gets clotheslined down by Benoit. Rey Mysterio is #8 and my goodness does Suzuki look out of place in there. Thankfully Rey headscissors him out about twenty seconds after entering, getting us down to an AWESOME tag match if they ever got around to doing it. Edge goes after Guerrero and here’s Shelton Benjamin, the current IC Champion and on pure fire at this point, at #9.

There isn’t a bad combination in the ring at the moment. Benoit tries to dump Rey but Eddie tries to put both of them out. Shelton can’t eliminate Edge so he walks into a headscissors from Rey instead. Here’s Booker at #10 to keep the talent level high. Question for discussion: who is the worst worker in the ring at the moment? Here’s Eric Bischoff to cheer on the Raw guys as Benoit puts Eddie in a Boston Crab.

Jericho is #11 to a BIG pop. Teddy Long comes out to cheer as well as various people beat on each other. Luther Reigns is #12 to stop the hot streak dead. With four Raw guys (Benoit, Edge, Jericho and Benjamin) and four Smackdown guys (Booker, Luther, Mysterio and Guerrero), it’s time for a showdown ala the West Side Rumble that the show is based on. That’s a cool idea in theory, but what happened to the “every man for himself” concept?

Muhammad Hassan is #13 and the match stops cold. Everyone surrounds Hassan and the group beatdown is on. The fans REALLY dig this, which says a lot about Hassan’s potential. He was going to win the world title over Batista in Washington DC at Summerslam, but real life issues got in his way. Hassan is out in less than a minute and here’s Orlando Jordan at #14. Tazz says we can compare Jordan to Benjamin. Other than a good look, talent, charisma or fan interest, they are indeed neck and neck.

Scotty 2 Hotty is #15 but Hassan jumps him in the aisle, keeping him from ever getting into the ring. Taker beat him down in the aisle in 2002 also so it’s not the best even for Mr. Hotty. The ring is getting too full now but most of the guys are talented enough that I can live with it. Charlie Haas is #16 and Luther is put out by Booker, as is Jordan. That clears things out a bit. Booker stops for a Spinarooni and charges into a low bridge from Eddie to get rid of him.

Renee Dupree is #17, giving us Benoit, Guerrero, Edge, Mysterio, Haas, Jericho, Benjamin and Dupree. The World’s Greatest Tag Team hits their Shelton jumps over Charlie spot to Renee but Shelton misses a splash in the corner and gets dumped by Edge. Simon Dean is #18 but he stops to do exercises on the floor before getting in. JR goes off on him in a funny bit. Eddie stops to look at him and Edge dumps Guerrero as a result.

Shawn is #19 and superkicks Simon out, doing some Hindu Squats to celebrate. Edge tries to corner Mysterio in a corner. JR: “Makes a lot of sense.” Shawn backdrops Charlie out and Kurt Angle is #20. He hits Angle Slams on everything in sight but tries the ankle lock on Shawn. Michaels rolls through and superkicks Angle out after less than 40 seconds. Coach is #21 and you can hear JR groan. He gets in a single shot on Benoit and runs to hide.

Edge tries to put Mysterio out and here’s Jindrak at #22. Angle comes back in and dumps Michaels before blasting him with the steps and putting him in the ankle lock. I’m thinking we need a masterpiece at Wrestlemania to settle this. Viscera is #23 and he pounds on everyone in sight. Paul London is #24 and nearly slides out of the ring from sliding in so far. Dupree takes him down but stops to dance, allowing Jericho to dump him.

London gets sent to the apron but slides back in as Cena (BIG pop) is #25. He gets in a shot on everyone and backdrops Viscera out. Cena and Benoit slug it out as Snitsky is #26. He’s still kind of a threat at this point and runs over everyone in sight. Londdon gets knocked to the apron again and hit with a HUGE clothesline for an even bigger backflip off the apron to the floor. That made a lot of highlight reels.

Snitsky and Cena stare each other down and John takes a big boot. Kane is #27 complete with pyro. Tazz: “WHY DO I HAVE TO SIT OVER HERE??? THIS IS NUTS!!!” Chokeslams all around as London is taken out on a stretcher. Jindrak goes out thanks to Kane and Coach of all people tries to avenge him. Batista is #28 and the pop that Cena got looks like a whimper. Snitsky is gone immediately and it’s time for a showdown with Kane. The crowd is WAY into Batista as he powerbombs Kane.

There goes Jericho thanks to Big Dave but Edge hangs on. Christian is #29 and he goes right after Cena. Cena is all like BRING IT ON and stomps Christian down in the corner. Rey hits a 619 on Kane and Cena FU’s the monster out. Flair is #30, giving us a final group of Benoit, Edge, Mysterio, Coach, Cena, Batsita, Christian and Flair. Not bad at all with one exception. Evolution teams up for a spinebuster on Coach for the elimination before doing the same to Christian.

Benoit chops away at Flair but walks into a spinebuster and the elimination by Ric. Flair goes for a toss out of Batista but gets glared at in response. Edge and Mysterio dropkick Batista down and Edge dumps Flair, getting us down to Edge, Mysterio, Cena and Batista. Edge spears Cena and Batista down but Mysterio avoids the one coming at him. There’s a 619 to the Canadian but a springboard legdrop misses and Edge spears Rey out. Edge charges at Cena and we’re down to Cena vs. Batista.

The fans REALLY like this (and they’re in red(ish) and blue to match their brands) and the staredown is on. Cena slaps away (clearly open handed) and tries the FU over the top but Batista blocks it. Dave loads up the Bomb but Cena fights out of it and they head to the ropes where both fall out, seemingly at the same time. Seriously, it’s so close you can’t fairly say one of them went out first.

We have a split decision, so here’s Vince to charge out, slide into the ring….and destroy his knees and rip both of his quadriceps at the exact same time. While Vince sits on the mat (and hopefully doesn’t seeing Batista dying laughing), both guys throw each other out and Vince restarts the match. Why this means we don’t start with Benoit and Guerrero again isn’t explained but it’s spinebuster and elimination for Batista, sending Big Dave to the main event of Wrestlemania.

Rating: A-. I don’t remember liking this as much the first time around but this was really good stuff. That segment in the first part with all the talent was reminiscent of the 1990 edition where there was a string of incredibly talented guys to start things off. Then things slowed down a bit, but once Cena hit the crowd, who was already red hot all night, got turned up to white levels and things went through the roof. Goofy ending (which wasn’t planned) aside, this was great stuff and a forgotten classic Rumble.

Overall Rating: B. This is a solid show overall with only the casket match being really bad. The Raw Title match isn’t terrible but it’s not worth watching either, especially with Orton’s lack of selling being horrible. Batista and Cena would of course go on to Wrestlemania to win both world titles and dominate the company for years to come, making this a truly game changing show. Good stuff here and certainly worth seeing.

Ratings Comparison

Edge vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B

Redo: B-

The Undertaker vs. Heidenreich

Original: D-

Redo: D

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Big Show vs. Kurt Angle

Original: B

Redo: C+

HHH vs. Randy Orton

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: B-

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

Like I said, I liked the Rumble a lot more this time around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/24/royal-rumble-count-up-2005-the-rise-of-the-new-generation/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 16, 2017
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

We’re less than two weeks away from the Royal Rumble and that means we’re getting closer and closer to finding out a lot of things for Wrestlemania season. The big story this week is the first announcement for the Hall of Fame and then probably finding out some more names for the Royal Rumble. Let’s get to it.

Martin Luther King Day video.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Roman Reigns to some of the loudest booing I’ve ever heard outside of a major city. Reigns can’t complain about getting beaten down when he’s outnumbered in a fight. He knows he lost the US Title but now he’s off to get the Universal Title at the Royal Rumble. Just in case you needed more proof that the US Title meant nothing on Roman. This brings out Paul Heyman who is almost immediately cut off by the GOLDBERG chants. Heyman gives us a spoiler for the Rumble but here are Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho to interrupt.

Jericho loves the idea of the Royal Rumble because no matter who wins, they’ll both wind up at Wrestlemania with both titles. Owens seems to agree but here’s Seth Rollins to cut them off. That means more promises of winning before Braun Strowman comes and stares Reigns down.

Strowman doesn’t say a word before Lesnar himself comes out. Sami Zayn runs in through the crowd and cleans house, including a Helluva Kick to put Braun outside. Brock throws everyone else down and is left alone with Sami, meaning it’s another German suplex for Zayn. Lesnar tells Braun to bring it on but Strowman drops to the floor, leaving Reigns to Superman Punch Brock. That earns him an F5 and Lesnar stands tall.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Rusev/Jinder Mahal

Enzo goes after Mahal to start but an elbow to the jaw takes him down. Mahal is sent outside and we take an early break. Back with Mahal dropping a knee on Enzo and Rusev grabbing a bearhug. Enzo slips out and the hot tag brings in Cass to clean house. Everything breaks down and the big boot to Mahal sets up the Bada Boom Shaka Laka for the pin at 8:35.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as is so often the case with Enzo and Cass matches. We need to get to the Rusev vs. Cass match, assuming we’re still getting it. Enzo being back in the ring really doesn’t do much for me and I’d be glad to have him stay outside full time while Cass does the work.

Ariya Daivari vs. Lince Dorado

Jack Gallagher is on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Lince getting in some strikes and the springboard Stunner for two. Dorado completely misses a high crossbody and a wind up lariat (Rainmaker) sets up a cobra clutch to make Lince tap at 2:18.

We look back at Undertaker announcing that he would be in the Royal Rumble.

Video on the UK Title Tournament.

Earlier today, Nia Jax attacked Sasha Banks during a knee injury evaluation.

Tag Team Titles: Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Anderson and Gallows

Cesaro and Sheamus are defending as this feud just keeps going. Anderson starts with Cesaro but Sheamus makes a quick blind tag as his partner hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. The champs start speeding things up until Cesaro misses a charge into the corner so Gallows can drop an elbow for two. It’s off to an armbar on Cesaro’s shoulder which has been taped up since he returned back in April. A slingshot shoulder brings Sheamus back in as things pick up all over again.

Everything breaks down with Gallows kicking Sheamus off the apron as we take a break. Back with Cesaro coming in off the hot tag as everything breaks down. The spinning elbow gets two on Anderson and Gallows’ boot to the face gets the same. Sheamus comes in and punches the referee by mistake, leaving no count off the Magic Killer. The fans think it’s awesome as another referee comes in to count the pin at 13:00.

Rating: B. I liked the match but the story is just doing nothing for me. There’s no reason for me to care about either of these teams and that makes for a really hard sit whenever these guys come out to the ring. It’s just not interesting as there’s no reason for them to be fighting other than “well, we don’t really have any other options.” I’m sure this sets up a Rumble rematch because that’s what we’re stuck with for a title feud.

And never mind as it’s a Dusty Finish as the champs are disqualified and retain the titles.

We look back at the opening segment. Tonight it’s a six man main tag with Reigns/Rollins/Zayn vs. Owens/Jericho/Strowman.

Tribute video to Jimmy Snuka.

Emmalina video.

Sami, Rollins and Reigns talk strategy. Zayn sticks his fist out for the Shield pose and the other two leave. Rollins’ eyes were hilarious.

Tony Nese vs. Rich Swann

Non-title and a 205 Live rematch. And no match as Neville comes in through the crowd and attacks Swann.

Post break Neville yells at an interviewer for not having enough respect and promises to beat Swann for the title at the Rumble.

Here’s New Day to talk about the Rumble. The royal rumblings say that it’s going to be foe vs. foe but Big E. thinks that if one of them wins the Rumble, they all win and go on to be in the main event of Wrestlemania. Cue Titus O’Neil and even the announcers are saying enough already. Titus thinks he could replace one of them and take their spot in the Rumble. That’s a no of course so Titus will just take it instead. Big E. agrees to put his spot on the line if Titus agrees to leave New Day alone for good.

Titus O’Neil vs. Big E.

Joined in progress with Big E. putting on an abdominal stretch. Titus comes back with a Dominator to set up a chinlock followed by his own abdominal stretch. The spanking is enough to tick Big E. off and he runs Titus down with ease. The Warrior Splash sets up the Big Ending for the pin at 4:56.

Rating: F. Now NEVER LET TITUS NEAR THEM AGAIN! Move on to ANYTHING else!

Jim Duggan talks about winning the first Royal Rumble.

Here’s Charlotte to discuss the winning strategy that has kept her undefeated on pay per view. By that she means laughing at the idea of Bayley beating her at the Royal Rumble. We see some pictures of Bayley as a kid meeting people like John Cena, Ivory, Rob Van Dam and Bret Hart from years ago.

Charlotte even has some poetry from what looks like middle school while Charlotte was training and getting scholarship offers. We even get a video of Bayley reading her essay on wanting to be a professional wrestler. Charlotte cuts the video and reads it herself until Bayley runs out to chase her off. Bayley calls this unnecessary so Charlotte says she’s just like the average fan.

If Charlotte wants to bring up all these stories, Bayley has a story for her. She didn’t have a father who could just make a phone call and get her into WWE. What she did have is a father who would spend everything he had to get her a ticket to every show in San Jose because that was all she ever wanted to do. Bayley even has a new poem for Charlotte: Roses are red, violets are blue, at Royal Rumble, I will defeat you.

Another look back at the opening sequence.

Strowman isn’t interested in talking strategy with his partners tonight.

Cedric Alexander vs. Brian Kendrick

They start fast with Cedric knocking him outside for a moonsault off the apron, only to get pulled down into a full nelson on the mat. Both guys take elbows to the face but it’s Cedric taking over off a springboard clothesline. Kendrick counters what looked like a belly to back suplex into the Captain’s hook as Alicia Fox runs out to play cheerleader. Cedric makes the ropes as we see Noam Dar watching from the back. The distraction lets Kendrick get in a baseball slide to the back before telling Fox to beat it toots. Back in and the Captain’s Hook is countered into the Lumbar Check for the pin on Brian at 4:42.

Rating: C. Cedric is one of the smoothest in ring performers going today and Kendrick..well he’s there too. I’m interested in this idea of the Alicia Fox being crazy story but that might just be because Fox is on my TV more often. Other than that though, this was your usual cruiserweight match, meaning it wasn’t the worst match in the world but it didn’t do much for me.

Cedric walks off with Fox in the ring.

We look at Nia attacking Banks again.

Nia laughs at the idea of Sasha being the Boss and loved seeing Sasha holding her knee in agony. The hype was over and the Boss was broken.

Fox doesn’t want to talk about it.

Kurt Angle is announced for the Hall of Fame. That’s LONG, LONG overdue.

Roman Reigns/Sami Zayn/Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho/Braun Strowman

It’s a brawl before the bell and Strowman throws Reigns over the top as we take a break. Back with the match joined in progress with Jericho coming in and taking a beating from Reigns and Zayn. Owens gets the tag and chinlocks Sami down, followed by an enziguri for two. The backsplash hits knees though and the diving tag brings in Reigns to clean house. Rollins and Jericho go at it on the floor, leaving Strowman to choke Reigns down for two.

Back from another break with Owens cutting Seth off so the beating on Reigns can continue. Owens’ chinlock is countered into a Samoan drop and the hot tag brings in Rollins. Everything breaks down again and it’s Sami and Seth with back to back dives. Rollins’ springboard knee to the face gets two on Jericho but Braun shrugs everything off. The trio gangs up on him though and Sami’s high crossbody gets two. The Helluva Kick is easily blocked though the powerslam wraps Zayn up at 14:22.

Rating: C+. Nice six man here and a good upgrade over some of the stuff on this show. Strowman getting another big pin is a smart move and it made for a good way to wrap up the night. There was enough action to make the match work and the ending was much better than having a champion get pinned.

Strowman takes Sami up to the announcers’ table but Seth comes up with a chair and Reigns adds a spear. The evil Canadians return from whatever hole they fell into and go for the table but Jericho takes a Pedigree on the stage. Owens cleans house with the chair and powerbombs Reigns through the table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it seems that they’re running out of ways to push the Royal Rumble over this many weeks. The show could have been much worse but stuff like New Day vs. Titus and the Tag Team Title feud (good match, boring feud) are dragging this show way down. The main event was better with someone exciting like Sami involved but it still wasn’t all that great.

Results

Enzo Amore/Big Cass b. Jinder Mahal/Rusev – Bada Boom Shaka Laka to Mahal

Ariya Daivari b. Lince Dorado – Cobra clutch

Anderson and Gallows b. Cesaro/Sheamus via DQ when Sheamus punched the referee

Big E. b. Titus O’Neil – Big Ending

Cedric Alexander b. Brian Kendrick – Lumbar Check

Braun Strowman/Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho b. Sami Zayn/Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns – Powerslam to Zayn

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2004
Date: January 25, 2004
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,289
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is the show where you can really see the next generation rising up. The main events other than the Rumble are Lesnar vs. Holly and HBK vs. HHH. Ok so maybe the next generation only comes up in the Rumble. Other than that we don’t have much going on here but this show is all about Benoit in the Rumble. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about Shawn vs. HHH because that’s what people are watching the ROYAL RUMBLE for right? The theme of the video is that things can change in the blink of an eye.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Evolution

Flair and Batista are defending here and this is a tables match. Coach is ticked off at the Dudleys for putting him through a table six nights ago on Raw, because if there’s one man you need to give a reason to be a heel, it’s COACH. Batista makes fun of the Eagles because he hasn’t broken through to the other side of the glass ceiling yet. The fight starts in the aisle as you would expect. This is one table to a finish, meaning only one guy has to go through to end it.

Bubba slides in a table but shoves it hard enough that it slides across the ring and hits Batista in the ribs on the other side of the floor. Flair gets double teamed to start and caught in a powerslam by D-Von. There’s a table set up in the ring but Batista moves it before Flair gets suplexed through it. D-Von hits a Cactus Clothesline on Batista as Flair chops Bubba against a table in the corner.

Big Dave comes back in with some clotheslines to clean house but misses a charge into the post. The belly to back neckbreaker from the Dudleys puts him down and it’s Flair getting double teamed again. According to JR, the Dudleys are the only team to win the (non-vacant) world tag team titles at the Rumble. Coach heads to the ring to distract the Dudleys and prevent a 3D to Flair. Flair saves Coach and Batista hits a spinebuster to put D-Von through a table to retain.

Rating: D. This match fell into the same trap that all bad tables matches fall into: the dull set of spots that fail until one works for the win. You rarely get something that gets around this through sheer carnage such as the match at the 2000 Rumble, but this was just terrible. I have no idea what they were going for here as the fans were disappointed and they only had four and a half minutes to get into it. Also: real smart WWE. This is the right way to start a show in Philadelphia: have some of the most famous ECW guys ever lose.

Cena raps about winning the Rumble when RVD comes in to steal the joke. Weed jokes are made. Josh Matthews looks like the king of all tools here.

There’s an empty seat for Mick Foley in the front row.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Rey is defending. This is during the Nidia is Blind phase which didn’t do anything for anyone. They speed things WAY up to start with Jamie avoiding the 619 and launching Rey into the air to take over. The champ gets draped over the top rope for two and a hard kick to the back gets the same.

Jamie hooks a chinlock which shifts into a seated abdominal stretch. Rey fights up and hits a dropkick and a springboard rana followed by the sitout bulldog for two. He springboards into a gutbuster from Noble for two though and momentum shifts again. Nidia accidentally grabs Noble’s foot, allowing Rey to hit the 619 and springboard legdrop…..for the pin? Huh?

Rating: D+. This was fast paced while it lasted, but those three words are the key: while it lasted. This barely broke three minutes which simply isn’t enough for a PPV title match. Unless I was missing it there was no sign of an injury or anything like that, but the match ends that fast. I have no idea what they were going for here but it didn’t work in any way at all. That’s a shame too because they were going well while it lasted.

Noble yells at Nidia post match.

We recap the battle of the Guerreros. Eddie was clearly the bigger star which was fine while they were champions, but once they lost the belts to the Bashams, Chavo blamed Eddie and turned on his uncle for losing his title. The Guerreros almost made up but they lost the rematch, after which Chavo let Eddie get double teamed by the Bashams. This was actually a pretty solid story despite how basic it was. Sometimes less is more. Oh and Kurt Angle was playing peacemaker and Chavo Guerrero Senior is in his son’s corner.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo bails to the floor before the bell and the fans are totally behind Eddie here. They fight over a lockup to start with no one being able to get an advantage. Chavo slaps Eddie in the face and now we’re ready to go. We hit the mat for a bit before Eddie starts snapping off chops in the corner. Chavo shoulders him down and we have a standoff. They chop it out again and Eddie goes to the eye like a true Guerrero.

Back to the mat with Eddie working on the arm before Chavo nips up and hooks a rana to send them both to the floor. Chavo sends Eddie into the announce table to finally take over and get some of the aggression going. Back in and they get into a kind of MMA style brawl on the mat until Eddie hooks a cross armbreaker of all things. That goes nowhere so Chavo suplexes Eddie down for two, followed by the Three Amigos. Eddie counters a tornado DDT and hits Three Amigos of his own. Chavo is down so Eddie goes up and hits the Frog Splash for the pin. ANOTHER quick ending tonight.

Rating: C+. This was way better than the other matches, but this felt like it was missing fifteen minutes or so. Three matches so far have combined to be about fifteen minutes long which is pretty lame for a modern PPV, even for the Rumble. This could have been a lot more, but the feud was completely done after tonight. Eddie would become #1 contender on the following Smackdown.

Eddie destroys Chavo post match in a pretty heelish display. Chavo gets busted open.

Ad for Mick Foley’s Greatest Hits and Misses. That’s the most entertaining part of the show so far.

Benoit likes his odds even though he’s #1 in the Rumble. Evolution comes up and says Orton is going to win the Rumble. Flair says Benoit may be great, but this is about Evolution tonight.

We recap Hardcore Holly vs. Lesnar. Brock broke Holly’s neck (legit) and Holly gets a world title shot out of it a year later. This is the textbook definition of the Rumble title shot where no one buys the champion as being in any danger whatsoever.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly jumps Lesnar in the aisle and sends him into the post because he wants to break Lesnar’s neck. We get a bell and Holly misses an elbow off the top to give Brock control. They head to the floor where Holly’s back is rammed into the apron and Lesnar hooks a reverse body vice back inside. That goes nowhere so Brock hits a Shell Shock for two and it’s right back to the hold.

We shift to a bearhug and then one of the most wicked overhead belly to belly suplexes you’ll ever see. Off to a kind of rear naked choke by Lesnar to keep things dull. Holly makes his comeback with the dropkick and hits the Alabama Slam but goes for a full nelson and revenge instead of the title. Holly hooks the hold and goes to the floor with it but has to break the count. The F5 hits a few seconds later to complete the inevitable.

Rating: D. This was Brock Lesnar defending the world title against Hardcore Holly on pay per view. If you can’t figure out why this got the rating it got, I can’t help you.

We recap HHH vs. HBK which is allegedly seven years in the making. I’m guessing THIS is supposed to be the FINAL blowoff to their feud instead of the classic in 2002.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

HHH is defending and this is a last man standing match. They chop it out to start and punch each other in the corner a lot. Shawn tries a backslide before realizing that makes no sense here, so it’s back to the chops. Michaels gets caught in a facebuster as things slow down a bit. A HARD whip into the corner has Shawn’s back in trouble and a backbreaker makes it even worse.

Out of nowhere Shawn takes out the leg and hooks a Figure Four, because where would we be without a Flair tribute? That gets a five count so Shawn hits a chop block for a four. HHH low bridges Shawn and we head to the floor for a bit. HHH loads up the announce table but Shawn blocks a Pedigree attempt. They slug it out on the table with HHH getting knocked to the floor, drawing a bunch of booing from the bloodthirsty Philadelphia fans.

Back in and Shawn counters a Pedigree with a backdrop to the floor but he injures his back in the process. Shawn tries a springboard cross body to the floor but crashes through the table instead as only he can. Instead of letting the now busted open Shawn get counted out, HHH throws him back in for the count, which reaches seven. The champ pounds Shawn down a few times for a few counts, most of which don’t get that far.

A fast spinebuster (literally, as Shawn was flying at HHH and it almost looked like a belly to belly instead of a spinebuster) gets about six. That’s the problem with most last man standing matches: it’s a big move then standing around for the count. That makes it very hard to get any kind of flow going to the match. HHH cracks Shawn in the back with a chair but Shawn gets up again. A Pedigree onto the chair is countered into a slingshot into the post, busting HHH open as well.

Now Shawn cracks HHH in the head with a chair, allowing HHH to do his weird “my head hurts and I’m not sure where I am” face. There’s the forearm followed by the nipup from Shawn, followed by an atomic drop and the top rope elbow. That gets about seven so Shawn tunes up the band, only to walk into a low blow to put both guys down. Shawn hooks a sleeper which eventually gets an eight count before walking into a DDT to put both guys down.

That gets a double eight count before we head to the corner. HHH tries a belly to back superplex but Shawn counters into a cross body for another double eight count. The Pedigree hits but it’s only good for a nine. Shawn pops up out of nowhere with some more Sweet Chin Music, putting both guys down for ten which keeps the title on HHH.

Rating: C-. The problem here is exactly what I said earlier: this was a lot of laying around. The last seven minutes or so had about five moves combined, as most of the match was “move, lay down, move, lay down, move, lay down.” The idea is supposed to be a ton of drama, but that didn’t happen here. Shawn would turn into a jerk in the next few weeks and insert himself in the Mania main event because of this ending.

Rumble video with a focus on Benoit.

The Fink is ready to start the Rumble but here’s Bischoff to run his mouth. He says that a Raw guy is going to win the Rumble because he’s respected as a GM. He runs down ECW, which brings out Heyman for a brawl. Cue Austin on his ATV to say that these two are both in violation of the law (he was called Sheriff Austin at this point) and wants to know who started it. Heyman and Bischoff: “HE DID!” Both guys get Stunners and the fans love it.

Goldberg, #30 in the Rumble, doesn’t get to talk because Lesnar comes in to interrupt him. Lesnar is called a coward, which will come into play later.

JR has to admit Foley is a coward because he isn’t here yet.

Royal Rumble

Benoit is #1 and the Intercontinental Champion Randy Orton is #2. Two minute intervals here again. They pound away on each other to start with Benoit taking him to the mat to stomp away. Mark Henry is #3 when he was a fat power guy with no direction at all. Allow me to be more specific: he’s still with Teddy Long. Benoit gets double teamed for awhile until Tajiri is #4. These intervals don’t seem to be two minutes or anywhere close to it.

The handspring elbow takes Orton down but Benoit rolls some Germans on Tajiri to take him down. Tajiri only gets two as I guess Benoit is conserving strength. Henry throws Orton to the apron but stops looking like an idiot. Bradshaw is #5 and he immediately clotheslines down everyone not named Benoit. Benoit takes offense to being left out and puts Bradshaw in the Crossface before pulling Bradshaw out. Eh he would get a nine month title reign stating in the summer so I feel no sympathy for him.

Rhyno is #6 as we’re flying through this so far. He goes after the two starters as Tajiri fires off kicks on Henry. Tajiri gets a half Tarantula on Henry but Henry gets Gored, knocking Tajiri out in the process. Benoit clotheslines Henry out and we’re down to three again. Matt Hardy is #7 and Benoit throws him to the apron almost immediately. In FAR less than two minutes, here’s Scott Steiner at #8. Oh dear it’s Scott Steiner at the Royal Rumble. This could be a disaster.

He starts firing off suplexes immediately but at least this time there are some t-bones to go with the belly to bellies. Benoit rolls some Germans on him as if to say THIS IS HOW YOU SUPLEX SOMEBODY. Things slow down a bit and here’s Matt Morgan at #9. He takes Benoit down with a Batista Bomb takes Benoit down and pounds away on Orton in the corner.

The Hurricane is #10 and comes in off the top with a cross body to Hardy. He goes after Morgan for no apparent reason and is thrown out in less than twenty seconds. Morgan throws Hardy to the apron again but can’t get him out. Booker T, complete with the stupid remix of his theme music with Booker singing, is #11. Booker immediately goes after Steiner in a revisiting of their WCW feud that no one was asking for.

Nothing of note happens until Kane is #12. This is after he buried Taker alive. For the first time. Steiner gets dumped by Booker during Kane’s entrance. Kane starts firing off chokeslams and other various power moves for which he is well known. The clock runs down at #13 and there go the lights. A gong goes off and Kane PANICS. Booker uses the distraction to dump Kane and here’s Spike Dudley at #13. He never makes it to the ring as Kane destroys him for setting off the gong.

Everyone tries to throw each other out while laying on the ropes until Rikishi is #14. Benoit dumps Rhyno to keep us at six people (Benoit, Orton, Rikishi, Booker, Morgan, Hardy) in the ring. Morgan gets a Stinkface and nothing else happens for a bit. Renee Dupree with the French Tickler is #15. In a surprising moment, Dupree actually knocks Matt out, only to be superkicked out by Rikishi a second later.

A-Train is #16 and goes right for Rikishi. Benoit avoids the yet to be named Carbon Footprint and dumps Morgan. I love that they’re keeping the ring from getting full. Orton dumps Rikishi and Booker as Shelton Benjamin is #17. Benoit dumps A-Train during his entrance and Orton dumps Shelton a few seconds later to get us back to two. Orton pounds on him a bit but they crack heads to put both guys down.

Lamont, the announcer for Ernest Miller (complete with the music that would go to Brodus Clay eight years later), runs out to introduce the Cat at #18. After some dancing (and singing by Tazz), Orton dumps him out. Miller would be released in like two weeks. Kurt Angle is #19 and he might be a bit harder to get out. He’s fighting for AMERICA here so the fans tell him he sucks.

Benoit and Angle destroy each other with chops and punches as only they can while Orton is content to chill in the corner. Rico, now in his Adrian Street phase, is #20. He fires off some kicks but lasts about as long as you would expect him to in a match with Orton, Angle and Benoit. The RKO takes care of Rico as Benoit rolls a ton of Germans on Angle. Test is #21…..and is nowhere in sight.

Orton RKO’s Angle and we cut to the back to see Test unconscious. Austin sees someone off camera and says they’re #21. The off camera man and presumable attacker: MICK FREAKING FOLEY! Orton, the guy who spat in Foley’s face and called him a coward, PANICS. The place goes nuts and Foley explodes on Orton, beating him half to death and hitting a Cactus Clothesline to put both of them out. This would lead to some AWESOME matches at Mania and Backlash which put Orton up to the world title in August.

Foley keeps beating on Orton as Christian is #22. Mick picks up the steps and BLASTS a security guy who tries to stop him. Orton comes back with two chair shots and fires back at Mick. They brawl up the ramp and Foley pulls out Socko, only to put it on Nunzio who comes in at #23. We haven’t seen anything of the match for awhile but I can live with that for a hot brawl like this. Orton kicks Foley low and runs as we go back to the ring.

Angle is getting double teamed as Nunzio is down on the floor. Big Show is #24 and apparently that’s Tazz’s pick. Thankfully he’s in the singlet and shorts again instead of the one piece swimsuit. Angle immediately goes after him but Show throws everyone around. Jericho is #25 as he’s in a weird phase of his career. He wasn’t a main event guy anymore but he had feuded with everyone in the midcard already so he just kind of hung around and filled in spots on the card.

All four guys go after Big Show (who has a head like a typewriter according to Tazz) but they can’t get him out. Charlie Haas is #26 but gets double teamed by Jericho and Christian. Currently we have Benoit, Angle, Jericho, Christian, Haas, Big Show and Nunzio who is on the floor. Jericho backdrops Christian out for the second year in a row as Billy Gunn is #27. Apparently this is a return for him. It’s Fameassers all around and then things slow down again.

John Cena is #28 and that pop is growing at an alarming rate. Show stares him down so Cena throws Nunzio in to kill some time. Nunzio goes after Show for some reason but Cena takes over for him to make it fair. RVD is #29 to a big pop of his own. It’s spin kicks all around until things settle down a bit. There’s an FU to Angle and Goldberg is #30. The final group: Benoit, Angle, Big Show, Jericho, Nunzio, Haas, Gunn, Cena, RVD and Goldberg. At least the ring didn’t fill up until the end so that’s not too bad.

Goldie spears a lot of people down to start before Nunzio jumps on his back like an idiot. Haas is put out and Nunzio takes a HUGE spear. Gunn is out as is Nunzio to get us down to seven. Goldberg loads up a Jackhammer on Show but Lesnar runs in with an F5 to break it up. Goldberg stares down Brock, allowing Angle to dump him out. All five remaining guys not named Big Show go after the one named Big Show but it still doesn’t work.

Everyone hits their finishers on Show instead with Cena (Show’s feud at the time) hitting the Shuffle instead of the FU, which I’m assuming they were saving for Mania. They try to dead lift Show and realize they screwed up by knocking a giant unconscious. Show shoves them all off and dumps Cena followed by Van Dam a few seconds later.

So it’s Big Show, Benoit, Angle and Jericho as the final four. Jericho gets sent to the apron twice and manages to hang on before bulldogging Show down. The Walls go on Show and he taps but Angle breaks the hold up for no apparent reason. Show chokeslams Benoit down but chokeslams Jericho even further, sending him to the floor to get us to three. A side slam puts Angle down and there’s another chokeslam to Benoit.

Show breaks up a German attempt from Angle but can’t block an Angle Slam. There’s a Slam to Benoit (it was a belly to back suplex but whatever) and the ankle lock to Show. Show taps again, but again it doesn’t mean anything. The big guy rolls through the hold and eliminates Angle in the process, getting us down to two.

Benoit dropkicks Show but knocks him back into the ring by mistake. A chokeslam is countered into the Crossface and Show taps again, but you know the drill by now. Show shrugs it off and picks Benoit up in a chokeslam. Benoit graps a front chancery though and pulls Show to the apron….then has him teetering on the ropes…..AND BENOIT WINS! The crowd kept getting louder as Benoit pulled further and further. Awesome sequence there.

Rating: A. There were some slow spots but this was ALL about Benoit and I can’t complain about that at all. The ending sequence here with all three submission guys making Show tap was a cool idea and different than the ending to any other Rumble. They didn’t throw a stupid curve here and made Benoit look like a star here, which is exactly what he was supposed to do. Great Rumble.

Overall Rating: B-. The Rumble is really REALLY good but the rest is horrible. Don’t watch the rest of the show, but if you’re a Benoit fan and can still sit through a long match of his, this is absolutely required viewing. Things would change a bit more the next year as two REALLY big names would be the stars of the Rumble, but that’s not for another year. For now, this was all about Benoit and he nailed it.

Ratings Comparison

Evolution vs. Dudley Boys

Original: C

Redo: D

Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Original: N/A

Redo: D+

Chavo Guerrero vs. Eddie Guerero

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Brock Lesnar vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: D-

Redo: D

HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Just as last time, the Rumble is the only thing worth seeing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/23/royal-rumble-count-up-2004-he-who-must-not-be-named/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

As much as wrestling is built on wrestling, what really matters the most are the moments that come to define wrestling. The little pieces of a match or a show are what will be put on highlight reels and designed to last forever. How many times have you heard about the Wrestlemania moment being what matters almost more than the match results themselves? Every year has a list of special things to see and today we’re looking at the moments of the year. As always, these are in no particular order.

1. New Day Breaks Demolition’s Record – Monday Night Raw – December 12

We’ll start with the most recent moment as one of the longest standing record title reigns came to an end. Originally set in 1989, Demolition had held the record for the longest Tag Team Title reign in WWE history (assuming you ignore the Women’s Tag Team Titles of the late 1980s) and it had seemed almost unapproachable. However, about halfway through the year, it became clear that New Day might actually have a shot at it.

New Day won the Tag Team Titles at “Summerslam 2015” and managed to hold onto them for over a year, putting them just a few months away from the record. With just a few weeks to go, New Day had one team after another thrown at them with a final triple threat match left between them and the record. New Day survived that title defense and then a second announced during the show, leaving them with the new record in a great show of emotion.

This is one of the moments that is more historic than anything else. The idea of someone breaking a record that was set the better part of thirty years ago seems almost unthinkable anymore but New Day managed to pull it off. The smiles on all three members’ faces showed you everything you needed to know about the moment and the team surviving was exactly what it needed to be.

2. AJ Styles Debuts – Royal Rumble

Since the debut of TNA in 2002, Styles was one of the biggest names to never work for WWE full time. Early in 2016, that changed forever as Styles debuted for the company as the #3 entrant in the Royal Rumble. This was the kind of thing that the Royal Rumble is made for and it became one of the best debuts ever in the history of the event.

Now that being said, WWE almost managed to screw this up. If you notice in the video, we don’t actually see Styles make his debut as the camera is locked in on Roman Reigns. You can hear the fans’ reactions but for the life of me I don’t know why we need to see Reigns at this point. Thankfully WWE released a slightly edited version of the video which shows the reason the crowd reacted.

Styles lasted nearly half an hour in the match but the bigger story here was the debut itself. This was one of the few dream signings left in the wrestling world and everyone knew what was coming as soon as Styles stepped through the curtain. The crowd knew what was coming and it helped that Styles wound up more than living up to the hype, but it was the entrance that really made it work in the first place.

3. Dean Ambrose Cashes in – Money in the Bank

dThis is one of those ideas that is done too often but when it works, it works to perfection. That’s what we had here as Ambrose became the second Money in the Bank winner ever to cash in on the same night (along with Kane in 2010). It was also a way to tie it back into the previous year when Seth Rollins defeated Ambrose at the exact same show, meaning Ambrose was finally back to even with his former Shield teammate.

The idea of someone cashing in on the same night that they win the Money in the Bank briefcase is something that is teased every single year but almost never winds up happening. Ambrose is the kind of crazy man who fits the idea of cashing in on the same day because you just can’t predict what someone like him is going to do.

The Shield is another important part to this story as Ambrose cashed in on Rollins, who had just won the title from Reigns. In other words, in the span of about five minutes, all three Shield members held the WWE World Title. That’s not bad for the same night and is something that is almost never going to be topped.

4. Goldberg Squashes Brock Lesnar – Survivor Series

Over a month has passed since this one happened and I’m still not sure what to think about it. Goldberg defeated Lesnar in less than ninety seconds, handing Lesnar his first pinfall loss in over three years. It was an old school Goldberg squash and I don’t think that’s what anyone expected. This is one of those things where there are going to be different opinions on it no matter what but it was certainly something that got people talking.

Lesnar had been the most dominant force in wrestling for a very long time and he just loses in less than a minute and a half. While some people could have seen Goldberg winning the match, the idea that the match would actually happen this way was borderline unthinkable. I remember it flashing in my mind as soon as the first spear hit but then it immediately left my head. By the time I knew what had happened, Goldberg’s music was playing again.

This is something that is a once in a generation idea but it certainly worked at the time. I’m almost sure we’ll see them fight again in a much longer match but there’s almost no way it’s going to live up to this one. I still don’t think it was the right call and would have had someone actually on the regular roster be the one to take down Goldberg but I will certainly never forget this one or how much I lost my mind as soon as the match ended.

5. Shane McMahon Returns – Monday Night Raw – February 22

Now this one is all shock value because everything after it was kind of a mess. McMahon hadn’t been seen since 2009 and he was one of the last names you would ever expect to actually show up again. Depending on who you believe, this was the replacement for an injured John Cena as McMahon would go on to face the Undertaker at “Wrestlemania XXXII”.

So in other words, we had not only a huge return but the returning star now has a big match set up. It’s a rare moment where the fans were somewhat worried about who might be coming through the curtain but no one expected it to actually be McMahon himself. Despite being in his mid-40s, the fans ate up the idea that he was back and standing up to his father for everyone else.

Watching all the WWE wrestling offered every single week often numbs you to surprises because either A, you’ve heard the rumors in advance or B, you can pretty much guess what’s going to happen. This was a rare instance where the necessity met the surprise and everything wound up working as well as it could have. That doesn’t happen often and it’s one of the best moments of the year.

6. Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte Main Event “Hell in a Cell 2016” – Hell in a Cell

This is one that really could have been a double entry as the fact that the women were even inside the Cell in the first place was historic enough. However, as soon as Rollins and Kevin Owens started their match, it was clear that we were in for something that had never been seen before in wrestling: women main eventing a major pay per view event.

As has been the case with so many of the milestones involved in the women’s revolution, this is something where you have to consider where things were just a few years ago. A few years back, it was reasonable to expect the women to get five minutes on a pay per view if they were lucky that month. The idea of the match being even remotely entertaining on top of that was just a bonus.

The match was immaterial compared to the fact that it was taking place though. What should have been a pretty nothing card wound up being something that had been built up for the last year plus and was finally being paid off by what was little more than a pipe dream beforehand. Banks and Charlotte are the first women to ever do something like this and hopefully they won’t be the last. It happened once though and that’s what makes it matter.

7. Shane McMahon’s Cell Dive – Wrestlemania XXXII

It’s rare to have a moment that works both as an homage to a more famous moment and as a moment all on its own. While a lot of people (myself certainly included) weren’t happy with Shane being on the show in such a high profile match, it’s safe to say that this made up for a little bit of it.

With nothing else working against the Undertaker (because Shane McMahon needed to get in offense on the Undertaker), Shane knocked him onto the announcers’ table, climbed the Cell, and dropped a huge elbow….which completely missed as Undertaker moved away. Ignoring what looked to be a crash pad underneath the table (thank goodness), this was one of the scariest bumps in years around WWE.

This was one of those moments that just worked based on what it was. He flew off the Cell and crashed through a table in a moment that doesn’t quite rival Foley but at least it was one heck of a memorable moment. Shane is always good for some excitement and that’s what we got here, assuming you can ignore the fact that this was what Undertaker was doing at Wrestlemania.

8. AJ Styles Wins the WWE Championship

One more AJ moment because this was his year. A few years back, who would have thought this could actually happen? Styles was stuck in TNA, clearly miles ahead of most of the roster but that pesky loyalty of his kept him from jumping to WWE and left him stuck there, dealing with whatever nonsense Dixie Carter approved that usually involved her being on TV in prominent positions.

Now flash forward to September when Styles beats Dean Ambrose and becomes the Smackdown World Champion, which is the title carrying the original WWE Championship lineage. That happened and it happened on a WWE pay per view. The fact that he debuted just a few months earlier and was rocketed up the card is amazing enough and, as expected, the match was great.

Styles is someone who had some very high expectations coming in to WWE and at least he lived up to so many of them. FINALLY seeing him reach this level in America was worth the wait and the fact that he’s been one of the best wrestlers in the world on the biggest stage makes things all the better.

For the first time this year, I’m really not sure which one to pick. Is it the moment that shocked almost everyone watching or the moment that is going to mean something in the history books? Honestly this is a very hard one to go for and I could see it going either way, which isn’t often the case.

However, there’s one thing that makes my decision for me: the feelings that came with the moment. Based on that, I have to go with Goldberg squashing Lesnar. That match had my head spinning for a good while after it was over and that doesn’t happen to me very often. It made me want to see what was happening next while leaving me a combination of excited and upset at the same time. It’s rare to have emotion like that in wrestling today and it makes all the difference in the world.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Lucha Underground
Date: January 4, 2017
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Matt Striker, Vampiro

We’re back to the promotion where Cage has a glove that gives him superpowers. Now, I don’t know about you but to me, that sounds FREAKING AWESOME. This show is starting to reach the point where they can do all kinds of things with the stories they have going on but the question is whether or not they can actually capitalize on those stories. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at the Battle of the Bulls, the Rabbit Tribe and Sexy Star vs. Mariposa (in theory Mariposa at least, or whoever is sending the spiders to Star).

Mil Muertes wants to know how Prince Puma is alive and Catrina blames Vampiro.

Catrina runs into Jeremiah Crane, who says he beat the man she loves (Mil) last week. She says that’s not who she loves and disappears.

Sexy Star vs. Mariposa

They waste no time and slug it out to start with Star getting the better of it and scoring with a hurricanrana to send Mariposa outside. That doesn’t go well for Star as Mariposa sends her into various hard objects, including the front of the announcers’ table. The fans are split here but switch to a holy excrement chant as Star goes into the table ten times.

Back in and the Butterfly Effect is broken up, followed by a sitout hiptoss of all things for two on Mariposa. A Samoan drop sets up a modified Indian Deathlock on Star with Mariposa kicking her in the head for a bonus. They head up top for a superplex, only to have Mariposa get shoved off, setting up a top rope double stomp to give Star the pin at 6:49.

Rating: C+. This is a match where I wanted to see more of it, which I can’t remember happening with Sexy Star. She’s much more interesting fighting people her size than someone who allows Striker to do that really, REALLY annoying “she’s just an underdog who won’t stop fighting” schtick. I liked that they just went with the violence here instead of trying to do a wrestling match, which doesn’t fit this setup.

Post match Marty Martinez comes out and chokeslams Mariposa. Striker: “WTF!” As in he says the letters.

The White Rabbit Tribe comes up to Mascarita Sagrada to tell him he’s their inspiration and god. Sagrada says no and calls them nuts.

Rabbit Tribe vs. Kobra Moon/Pindar/Vibora

The fans call Pindar Luchasaurus and Moon has Drago on a leash. Mala Suerte and Pindar get things going and it’s off to Saltador for a right hand to the jaw. Apparently Drago will be taking Moon’s place as I’m still not sure what’s going on with this story, nor do I care. Drago gets taken into the corner for some triple teaming from the Rabbits. That goes nowhere though as it’s off to Vibora, who easily cleans house and brings Pindar back in for a forearm to Paul London’s head. Everything breaks down and Drago gets to clean house though London scores with some superkicks on Vibora. That earns him a tombstone though and Drago adds a running boot to the face for the pin at 7:29.

Post match Drago is chained again, which seems to hypnotize him. Aerostar and Fenix come in for the save as Drago is released but he doesn’t seem to recognize them. They’re able to keep him from leaving with the villains.

Sexy Star comes in to see Mack who wants to win the title by himself tonight. Star is cool with that.

Dario comes in to see Mack and says tonight isn’t going to be for the title. Instead the winner gets to pick the stipulation for the title match down the line. Dang it I can’t stand that kind of booking.

The Mack vs. Johnny Mundo

Non-title because Lucha Underground is changing the way they’re booking. Feeling out process to start with Mack actually taking him down in a nice amateur move, only to be kicked low for his efforts. An enziguri staggers Mack and Johnny flips him off, earning himself a suplex on the floor.

The champ’s crawl under the ring allows him to knee Mack in the head against the barricade for a sick sounding crash. Mack actually comes back with a slam and People’s Elbow of all things for two. A nipup into a standing moonsault is good for another near fall on Mundo and an Alpha Bomb (slam into a powerbomb) draws in the Worldwide Underground. As you might expect, Mundo hits a low blow for the pin at 8:43.

Rating: C. I liked what we had going here but there’s only so much you can do without much time and in a match that really doesn’t matter too much. Mack continues to be very deceiving as he looks like someone very overweight but winds up being someone who can do moves far beyond what you would expect. Also, the heel wins here? You couldn’t just have Mack win via countout or DQ or something?

Mundo calls him fat and makes the match All Night Long.

Mil Muertes comes out and jumps Vampiro for saving Puma. Cue Puma for the save but Vampiro calls him off and takes the Flatliner to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was one of those shows designed to set stuff up for the future, which is fine for a placeholder and in Lucha Underground’s place, I can actually believe that it’s going to pay off down the line. Muertes vs. Dark Puma could be interesting and I’d like to see where it goes, though the Vampiro bit scares me somewhat. This wasn’t a great show but maybe it can lead somewhere great, which is a good sign.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Lucha Underground
Date: January 11, 2017
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

We’re in a weird place at the moment in Lucha Underground as things are taking forever to get anywhere, though at the same time CAGE HAS FREAKING SUPERPOWERS. It’s hard to say where these shows are going to go from week to week but that can make things that much more interesting. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Dragon Azteca Jr. wanting to go after Matanza, Cortez Castro coming back to the Temple under a mask, Texano getting mad at Famous B. and Johnny Mundo picking All Night Long for his match with the Mack.

Councilman Delgado is in Dario Cueto’s office to talk about Cage with the gauntlet. Dragon Azteca comes in and wants a death match with Matanza, which is granted for tonight.

Vampiro says he’s coming for Mil Muertes at some point in the future.

Texano vs. Joey Ryan

Joey puts the lollipop in his trunks and Texano isn’t sure what to think. To be fair neither am I. A shoulder and slingshot hilo get two on Joey and it’s time to head outside because almost every match is a brawl around here. The lollipop comes back out and ignore the small, curly hair stuck on it. Back in and a kick to the ribs sets up a chinlock on Texano as this is less one sided than you would expect.

Cue Famous B. and Brenda in cowboy gear to recruit Texano. A middle rope leg lariat gets two on Joey but he grabs a t-bone suplex. Joey’s superkick gets two and Texano looks shocked (and rightfully so). With Famous B. distracting Joey, Brenda slips Texano a horseshoe to knock Joey out for the pin at 7:04.

Rating: D+. Seriously? Texano now needs Famous B. to beat Joey Ryan? The guy who rubs oil on his chest is now a match for someone as good as Texano? I’m hoping Texano doesn’t turn heel and become another Famous B. lackey as he’s hardly the most interesting heel in the world.

Texano shoves B. down and high fives fans as he leaves.

Here’s Mundo for a chat but the fans shout him down in Spanish. You can call him whatever you want because you also have to call him champion. He came here when this place was an upstart and beat everyone put in front of him. The Worldwide Underground believed in him though and that brings him to Mack. After some standard big guy jokes, Johnny says Mack can’t last all night long. Cue Mack for the fight and he actually beats up the entire team to stand tall. Mack says the title will be his.

Cage vs. Veneno

That seems to be Castro under his mask. Veneno is wearing a spider style mask and Vampiro says the name means poison. A few kicks have Cage in trouble until a Screwdriver crushes Veneno for the pin at 1:23.

Cage leaves and Sexy Star comes out to yell at Veneno, likely due to the spider mask.

Prince Puma is hearing Vampiro’s voices in his head when Catrina comes in to say it’s not the same after you die. All Puma can see is blood and pain but it’s Mil’s. Catrina sees the same, but it’s Puma’s.

Matanza vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

Death match. Dragon fires off kicks to start as Vampiro goes on about bloody baseball bats. Matanza slugs him down though and throws in the first chair, which is of course pelted at Matanza’s head. The monster is knocked to the floor for a dive but he throws Dragon into the wall to take right back over. Dragon is carried up to the balcony but he grabs part of the ceiling and flips onto Matanza. In one heck of a scary looking spot, Dragon hurricanranas him down the steps (like TWO of them) but a chokeslam OFF THE BALCONY AND THROUGH A BIG BUNCH OF WOOD is good for an immediate stoppage at 6:34.

Rating: C+. That seems like a way to write Dragon off and while I’m not sure why they needed to do that, at least the match was fun while it lasted. You need to have Matanza be a monster for a bit and this is as good a way as anything else. Massacring jobbers is only going to get you so far and Matanza is WAY past that point already.

Rey Mysteiro comes back to go after Matanza and knocks him through Dario’s roof. Dario tells everyone to get out.

After the credits, Marty Martinez stalks Melissa Santos but Mariposa kidnaps him. She thinks he might be learning something but a slap to the face just makes him laugh.

Overall Rating: C+. This was an interesting enough show though as is often the case, it seems to be a way to set up for things later on instead of doing things that actually matter at the moment. It’s not a bad show but this forty week season is going on WAY too long and is really dragging the show down in the process.

Apparently this is a mid-season finale and the show will be back in the summer. That’s a very, very long time off and that’s not good.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Ring of Honor
Date: January 11, 2017
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Nigel McGuinness

We’re back to the regular schedule this week and that means the Decade of Excellence tournament continues. The winner gets a World Title shot at the 15^th Anniversary Show against new World Champion Adam Cole, who won the title for an unprecedented third time at Wrestle Kingdom 11. Let’s get to it.

We open with clips of Christopher Daniels defeating Mark Briscoe in the first tournament match.

Daniels talks about being around for the start of Ring of Honor. He’s been around for fifteen years because there is no expiration date on destiny. I’ve never been a big Daniels fan but I could really go for him winning the tournament and the title. He’s earned it with some excellent promos recently and it would be cool to see.

Opening sequence.

Decade of Excellence Tournament First Round: Jay Briscoe vs. BJ Whitmer

Unfortunately this means we get to hear about Kevin Sullivan, who is still at ringside. Whitmer pokes Jay in the eyes to start and chops him in the back of the head a few times. Jay’s running clothesline in the corner rocks Whitmer but they head outside where Punishment Martinez offers a distraction so BJ can take over.

Back from a break as I continue to loathe all things associated with this Sullivan story, save for Martinez of course. Whitmer runs into an elbow and it’s time for some snap punches. A suicide dive takes Whitmer into the barricade but Jay might have banged up his elbow. Whitmer seems to be enjoying the pain so Jay punches him a few more times, only to get caught in an exploder suplex for two. It’s time for the spike but Mark Briscoe comes out for the save, allowing the Jay Driller to score the pin at 9:57.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and the lack of Sullivan doing anything of note helped a lot. Briscoe advancing is a big deal as he’s still one of the top stars in the company and can be turned into a big dragon (albeit a friendly one) for someone to vanquish. It’s not bad and the right winner helped a lot.

Whitmer says everything ends with a sacrifice next week.

Silas Young/Beer City Bruiser vs. Alex Reynolds/Jon Silver

Silver actually suplexes Young for two to start until the massive Bruiser comes in with a clothesline to knock Reynolds into a German suplex for two. Bruiser adds a cannonball for two more on Alex but he avoids a charge and rolls over for the tag off to Silver. The much smaller Jon manages a suplex on the Bruiser in an impressive display of strength. A Codebreaker into a German suplex gets two on Young but he kicks Silver in the head. Bruiser adds a Banzai Drop and Young gets the pin at 4:50.

Rating: C. This was better than it had any right to be and that’s always a nice surprise. Silver and Reynolds are on a long list of names of smaller guys who don’t have much of a look but can put on an energetic enough match to get by. They need some more polishing (ok a LOT more polishing) but at least it was a good first performance.

Post match Young says he and Bruiser want another partner to go after the Six Man Tag Team Titles (oh yeah those exist). They call out Bull James and then beat him up for not being the guy. Ok then.

Kingdom vs. Cheeseburger/Will Ferrara/Joey Daddiego

Non-title. The Kingdom jumps them to start with Marseglia beating up all three at once until Daddiego gets in a fall away slam to put the champs on the floor. Back from a break with Ferrara getting stomped in the corner as the Kingdom continues to be difficult to tell apart because no one bothered to tell us anything about them.

O’Ryan spears Taven by mistake and the hot tag brings in Cheeseburger. Everything breaks down and the Kingdom starts firing off kicks, only to be taken down by the palm strikes. There are a bit too many members of the Kingdom though and a kick drops Cheeseburger so Taven can frog splash him for the pin at 7:53.

Rating: D+. Here’s the problem: Kelly said the Kingdom rules the six man division and I guess that’s true, assuming you can name more than three or four six man teams. There’s just NO need for these titles and it’s becoming more and more clear every single time they’re brought up. The Kingdom is fine enough but that doesn’t mean they’re in need of titles.

We look at Matt Hardy promising to come after the Young Bucks. I still love the fact that, at least so far, TNA doesn’t seem to be gaining anything at all from this match.

Here are the Young Bucks with something to say. Matt can barely talk because he’s been screaming for joy over their new contracts. They’re not spot monkeys and they won’t be deleted. The lights go out and a drone (not Vanguard I) flies in, earning itself a superkick.

Decade of Excellence Tournament First Round: Colt Cabana vs. Chris Sabin

Alex Shelley is on commentary. They fight over a wristlock to start until Chris kicks him in the chest and gets two off a high crossbody. What looked like a thumb to the eye allows Colt to send him outside and we go to a break. Back with Colt putting on a one armed camel clutch but missing a middle rope splash. Instead Chris gets in a missile dropkick to send him outside, setting up a running kick to the chest. Back in and Cabana scores off a hip attack but here are the Boys to fan Cabana a bit. The distraction lets Chris get a small package for the pin at 8:14.

Rating: C-. This was fine again though I’m not wild on Sabin, who was hardly beaten down, using a very heel style rollup to win a match. Neither guy seems to have even the slightest chance of winning the thing, which hopefully is being loaded up for a Daniels win, though Jay Lethal is also a possibility.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t the worst show in the world but it’s much more about setting up things for the future instead of being a major show this week. There weren’t a lot of big names involved this week and, save for a longer squash, most of it didn’t do anything for me. It’s still fine but that’s not really noteworthy.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6