Lucha Underground – October 27, 2016: It’s A Soul In A Box
Lucha Underground Date: October 26, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker
The countdown to Aztec Warfare is on and that means things are about to pick up around here. The problem with this season so far has been the lack of any meaningful story but the entire roster contending for the title in one match should get us somewhere. If nothing else it would be nice to see something other than one random challenger a week. Let’s get to it.
This week’s opening recap looks at Texano vs. Cage, Johnny Mundo getting a Gift of the Gods Title shot and Ivelisse’s boyfriend Jeremiah. These things are a great refresher and a solid preview of things to come tonight.
Sexy Star comes into Dario Cueto’s office and demands her Lucha Underground Title shot next week. Dario admires her huevos but says she has to defend the Gift of the Gods Title against Johnny Mundo tonight. If Aerostar, Fenix or Drago interfere, they’re banned from the Temple forever.
Marty Martinez vs. Ivelisse
Marty smiles as Ivelisse forearms him in the face and a middle rope crossbody is turned into a powerslam. As the beating goes on, Vampiro says Marty weighs 300lbs. I know wrestling weights are gimmicked but that sounds insane. Mariposa gets in a few bites (thereby freaking Melissa Santos out) and Marty elbows Ivelisse in the face. A few strikes stagger Marty but Ivelisse’s guillotine choke actually brings him down. Well at least a little down until he knocks her silly with a spinebuster. A full nelson slam puts Ivelisse away at 4:20.
Rating: D+. Lucha Underground is normally pretty good with their intergender matches but in this case it was Marty destroying one of the best women in the promotion. Ivelisse never had a chance here and Marty, who isn’t much of a star in his own right, basically squashed her. What happened here?
Post match Jeremiah comes in and cleans house until it turns into a brawl, likely setting up a tag match. Jeremiah seems to apologize to Ivelisse for interfering but she’s not pleased.
The Rabbit Tribe, including Paul London, is coming soon.
Jeremiah is still apologizing and suggests he join the Temple. The idea of them fighting together seems to appeal to Ivelisse.
And now, let’s make things interesting. We go to the inside of Councilman Delgado’s limo when Dario gets in. Dario says someone’s ascension is complete (they might be talking about their boss but it’s not clear) and Delgado talks about needing a host body. It seems that the series between Texano and Cage will be for the right to be the host so Delgado hands Dario a box…..which I assume contains a soul? Now THIS is Lucha Underground!
Texano vs. Cage
This is match #3 in a best of five series with Cage up 2-0. Texano goes right after him (because he’s desperate) and a clothesline sends Cage outside. A whip into the eternally empty wooden chairs makes things even worse for Cage so he throws Texano right back. Texano pops back up as well and sunset bombs Cage over the top and back onto the floor.
Back in and the no selling continues with Cage throwing him down in a fall away slam. A top rope superplex puts both guys down in a heap and Cage is the first to cover for two. Cage’s pumphandle faceplant gets the same so Texano hits a middle rope leg lariat for his own near fall. This is a bunch of trading spots and that’s all it should be. A buckle bomb sets up an F5 on Texano and the kickout frustrates Cage even more. With Cage at his wits’ end, Texano grabs a small package for the pin at 7:45.
Rating: C+. I’m a big fan of that ending as they were beating the heck out of each other until one guy puts the brakes on and goes in a completely opposite direction for the pin. It’s good psychology and works almost every time. I’m sure we’ll see these two fight again but it’s nice to keep them from fighting on every single show. In other words, this isn’t Cesaro vs. Sheamus.
Dario is looking in the box (What could that possibly look like?) when Rey Mysterio comes in. Rey wants to face Chavo Guerrero in a Loser Leaves the Temple match. Dario agrees and says you have to put a dog down for its own good. Now anyone other than a wrestling face would see that something is up with a statement like that but Rey is cursed with being an idiot.
Gift of the Gods Title: Johnny Mundo vs. Sexy Star
Star is defending. It’s a change of pace this time as Star tries to stay away to start, only to get taken down into an amateur wrestling contest. This goes badly for the champ and Johnny kicking at the legs make it even worse. A botched looking neckbreaker puts Sexy down again and a running knee to the face gets two.
Johnny goes Backlund with a crossface chickenwing before putting Star on the top rope and elbowing her in the face. You don’t see that very often but it’s happened twice on this one show. Johnny tries a moonsault but lands on raised feet to FINALLY (ok they’re four minutes into the match) give Star an opening. Star goes with some weak looking right hands to the face and a failed monkey flip because YOU CAN’T MONKEY FLIP JOHNNY MUNDO! Yeah doesn’t have quite the same ring.
Mundo spears the referee by mistake and of course Star chokes Johnny out a few seconds later. Cue the Worldwide Underground to lift Star up so Johnny can charge at her, sending her flipping over and down to the mat (Chikara’s BDK used it as their finisher, Ragnarok). Another referee comes in as the Underground leaves (So he was watching the match to see the ref bump but not the interference?) to count two, meaning Johnny knocks him out too.
The Underground wraps a chair around Star’s neck but before they can Pillmanize her, it’s the Mack running in with a bunch of Stunners. Star chairs Mundo in the head for two and I can hear Vince Russo’s laughter in my head. Johnny misses the split legged moonsault but pulls out a pair of brass knuckles to knock Star out for the pin and the title at 11:43.
Rating: D. I know this is a promotion where the suspension of disbelief has to be stretched but the idea that the referees didn’t catch on to ANY of that cheating is too much for me to take. This was Sexy Star vs. the World (wide Underground) and it really didn’t work. Mundo cheating to win once or twice at the most would have been fine but this was two people interfering, a chair, two ref bumps and brass knuckles. There’s a line you can cross where it’s too much to take and this match jumped over it.
Prince Puma is working out when Vampiro comes in to say beating Mil Muertes was a great first step. Vampiro brings up Muertes killing Konnan, which Puma finds due to Vampiro’s hatred of Konnan. Puma seems to think about it to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t a strong episode on the wrestling side though we’re starting to get back on the right path with the storytelling, which is where Lucha Underground shines. You can tell there’s going to be some big stuff coming at the Aztec Warfare show and that’s a good sign going forward. This show wasn’t a good sign though and that’s quite the fall after last week’s strong outing.
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It’s another version looking at some smaller stories because I’d be wasting your time looking at Charlotte vs. Sasha again or complaining about Stephanie being annoying.
Monday Night Raw – May 27, 2002: That Looked Like It Hurt
Monday Night Raw Date: May 27, 2002
Location: Skyreach Centre, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Attendance: 9,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
Things are getting a bit more interesting around here but there’s a lot of bad still going on as well. Possibly above all else though, it seems that people like Eddie Guerrero and Rob Van Dam are moving up towards the top of the card, which is the most important thing that could happen at the moment. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
We open with a big deal as Chris Benoit makes his first appearance in nearly a year after neck surgery. JR: “To these fans, Chris Benoit is bigger than Wayne Gretzky in Edmonton.” I’m only a casual hockey fan but I’m pretty sure that’s WAY off. Benoit says he was drafted to Smackdown but there was no way he was missing being here in his hometown. Before Benoit can give his reason for being here, Eddie Guerrero cuts him off.
Eddie says he’s the only one with charisma and Latino Heat but he’s glad to see Benoit again. Since Chris has been gone, Eddie has won the Intercontinental Title and took out Steve Austin, which Benoit has never done. Benoit isn’t impressed with Eddie hitting Austin and then running but here’s Ric Flair to cut off a fight.
Flair accuses Benoit of causing this because he’s a typical Canadian. That’s the kind of basic heel insult that is always going to work no matter what. Flair asks if the fans want to see Benoit vs. Guerrero or Austin walking down the aisle tonight. Well too bad because Austin’s wife had a family emergency and can’t be here. Benoit isn’t wrestling either because he’s a Smackdown guy. Unless he’s got a ticket, get out of Ric’s ring. So a ticket lets you get in the ring. Good to know. Security takes Benoit away.
European Title/Women’s Title: William Regal/Molly Holly vs. Spike Dudley/Trish Stratus
They loved this double title match gimmick. Regal and Trish are defending and only one title can change hands. Spike goes right after Regal to start and mostly botches a top rope seated senton, which looked more like a Rough Ryder. A headscissors sends Regal over to the corner and it’s off to the women. That means some Canadian fire as Trish hammers away to keep the crowd fired up. It’s clear that WWE knows how to give the fans something special like having Benoit and Trish in the first two segments but they so rarely do it. Molly gets in some forearms of her own in the corner but a quick backslide retains Trish’s titles.
Rating: D. Well that happened. They did the right thing by not changing the titles here but sweet goodness the European Title is about as worthless of a belt as I can remember seeing. If Regal vs. Spike in a series of matches that peak at three minutes is the best they can do, the title can’t last much longer.
Molly hits Trish with Regal’s knuckles.
Steven Richards says Jazz is out with a knee injury but she’s recovering nicely. Jacqueline comes in to laugh at Steven for calling Jazz cute and cuddly. Steven thinks Jacqueline has a crush on her so she DDTs him on the floor for two. Shawn Stasiak and the Big Boss Man come in and brawl, leaving interviewer Terri to become champion. The reign lasts all of ten seconds as Steven rolls her up to get it back. You would think doing the same joke night after night would have gotten old over a year ago but you would be wrong.
The NWO is getting warmed up when Kevin Nash comes in. If Booker and X-Pac lose their match tonight, they’re off the team. Booker wants his old theme music back. Goldust is shown eavesdropping from a tub.
X-Pac/Booker T. vs. Hardy Boyz
If the NWO team loses, they’re out of the group, which would leave Big Show and Kevin Nash as the whole lineup. X-Pac kicks Matt in the face a few times to start but the middle rope legdrop gives Matt two. It’s off to Jeff vs. Booker with the latter taking the Whisper in the Wind. Matt clotheslines the NWO and everything breaks down with Jeff cleaning house. Booker gets in an ax kick but X-Pac makes the blind tag and hits the X Factor for the pin. For some reason Booker is annoyed, even though he was the one not paying attention.
Rating: D. This is a match that did in fact happen. Really there’s just nothing else that can be said about so many of these matches on Raw as there’s no time to go anywhere and we’re in and out in a few minutes. Booker being in the NWO is fine but the big deal is when he goes against them and turns into one heck of a face. He’s certainly got the in ring ability to back it up.
Paul Heyman tries to go into the trainer’s room to see Trish but runs into Bubba Ray. Bubba beats Heyman up and talks about wanting to do this for years.
Tommy Dreamer is in the ring and I hope this goes quick. He tries to get a bite of a fan’s hot dog but spills it on the floor. Dreamer eats it anyway because he’s gross and this is a really dumb story. Cue Undertaker to force Dreamer to drink tobacco juice (he likes it) and crushes his throat with a chair. For some reason, this takes over ten minutes.
Heyman gives Brock Lesnar a pep talk.
Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Brock Lesnar
Bubba tries a new strategy with Brock by hitting him right in the face just after the opening bell. Amazingly enough it doesn’t break Brock’s jaw and he sends Bubba flying, much to Heyman’s delight. After a quick trip to the floor, Bubba scores with the elbow to the head and a neckbreaker for two.
Bubba has to fight out of a bearhug (with Lesnar lifting him off the ground like he’s the Hurricane) but gets caught in an overhead belly to belly. A flapjack has Lesnar in trouble but the side slam only gets two. The Bubba Bomb should have the pin so Heyman offers a distraction. Lesnar splashes Heyman by mistake but the F5 finishes a few seconds later.
Rating: C-. It’s a good idea to have someone get in some offense on Lesnar but that’s too much selling for a monster who has only been around for a few months. Bubba is a good challenge for Lesnar but Brock needs to move up the ladder a little bit faster. That Hardys feud went on too long and this needs to go a lot faster. Entertaining little match though.
Raven of all people says Steve Austin is in pain and his reflection is always looking at him in a mirror. Austin’s reflection is that of a troubled, tormented soul but this is his destiny. That’s quite the odd cameo.
Bradshaw vs. Big Show
In theory, Show is out of the NWO if he loses here. JR says this won’t be pretty and I can’t say I disagree so hopefully it’s pretty short. Bradshaw goes smart by taking out Show’s legs and pounding away. The forearms to the back don’t have much effect as Show runs Bradshaw over without much effort. They slug it out and the Clothesline only puts Show on the ropes. A chokeslam ends Bradshaw in less than two minutes. I mean, I know Raw is dying for stars and everything and they had put some effort into Bradshaw but the right move has to be to have Big Show nearly squash him clean.
Booker doesn’t like X-Pac stealing his pin earlier. Goldust, in NWO paint, comes in to applaud. X-Pac accuses him of disrespecting the colors but Booker says it makes him look like a freaky Oreo cookie. Booker thinks it’s funny but X-Pac runs off to tell Nash what’s going on. They couldn’t make this team any more lame if their lives depended on it.
Al Snow and the Tough Enough finalists are at the World in New York and we have arm wrestling. Jake and Jackie win if you remember their names for some reason.
Rob Van Dam congratulates Terri for winning the Hardcore Title. He’ll win the Intercontinental Title later tonight because no one gets as high as RVD.
Howard Finkel arrives late and disappoints Coach by not being Steve Austin.
Crash Holly vs. Goldust
Crash gets two off a dropkick and cradle but the Curtain Call finishes him in a hurry.
Post match Nash comes out to go after Goldust but beats up Crash instead.
Flair tells Eddie to not worry about Austin interfering.
Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Eddie Guerrero
Eddie is defending and this is a ladder match. Van Dam goes straight to the kicks to start, including the spinning version from the apron. The pace changes as Eddie sends him face first into the ladder which doesn’t even fall over. JR thinks Van Dam isn’t the same after going into a ladder. I might wait more than ten seconds to make such a bold statement Jim. Eddie wraps the leg around the post (smart move) and cracks it with a chair (smarter move).
Van Dam, despite having a crushed knee, does his rolling monkey flip out of the corner. That earns Rob a hard powerbomb but he’s still able to dropkick a second ladder into Eddie’s face. Cue Benoit down the stands and of course he’s got a ticket. How he has one despite the show being announced as sold out isn’t clear but this is an old standard so we’ll just go with it.
Back from a break with Van Dam dropkicking the ladder out from under Eddie for a big crash. Rolling Thunder onto the ladder isn’t enough for Van Dam to get the belt as Eddie climbs up for a big sunset bomb to put both guys down in a heap. Eddie goes up so here’s a fan to shove the ladder over like an idiot.
Van Dam gets knocked down again, allowing Eddie to hit a hilo off the ladder for the latest in a string of big spots. For some reason Eddie puts a chair in the corner, allowing Rob to send him into the steel instead (as per wrestling rule #3). The split legged moonsault onto the ladder onto Eddie and it’s Van Dam’s turn to be exhausted.
A suplex into the standing ladder knocks Rob down again but he monkey flips Eddie into the ladder in the corner. They’re beating the heck out of each other here and every spot is awesome. Rolling Thunder onto the ladder onto Eddie sets up the Van Daminator….but Rob’s Five Star off the ladder doesn’t work as the ladder slips out from underneath him. For once Rob plays it smart by kicking Eddie to the floor and climbing up to get the belt.
Rating: A-. Well that worked. These guys beat each on each other with everything they could find and it never stopped being entertaining. This was about carnage and people doing things to hurt each other with two very talented people knocking it out of the park. Van Dam getting the title back is a good call and he can hold it until another big time heel takes it away. Like Brock perhaps.
Eddie goes after Rob again but here’s Austin for the big beatdown. Flair and Arn Anderson come in and get stomped down, only to have Benoit jump the railing and deck Austin. Eddie adds a frog splash to end the show.
Overall Rating: C-. This was a show in two parts and we’ll look at the good first. Austin/Van Dam vs. Guerrero/Benoit is as strong of a main event scene as you’re going to get on Raw at this point and there’s little to complain about there. Above all else, it’s not the NWO and that’s an upgrade for everyone.
That pretty much ends the good stuff (with Lesnar vs. Dudley being somewhere in the middle) as the rest was mostly dull, though not horrible. The NWO and lower card title stuff comes off like the writers just meeting requirements instead of doing anything worth their time, though to be fair those titles are both so worthless that it’s probably not worth getting annoyed over. This was the best show they’ve done in months and hopefully the start of an upward trend for them.
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NXT Date: October 26, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves
It’s the final night for the first round of the Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic. We’re also less than a month away from Takeover: Toronto and that means it’s time to start firming up a lot of the card. We already know a few of the matches so there won’t be many surprises but NXT is great at putting pepper on the steak. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic: DIY vs. Hoho Lun/Tian Bing
Bing is the recently signed Chinese wrestler Bin Wang. Ciampa and Bing get things going with Wang looking good as he runs Ciampa over to start. A PSYCHO KILLER chant breaks out but switches to a Johnny Wrestling version as Gargano comes in to kick Lun in the head. Hoho gets in a dropkick and brings Tian back in for some strikes to the chest. A chinlock doesn’t last long as Gargano kicks Bing’s head off and brings Ciampa right back in. Johnny tags himself back in though and cuts Lun in half with the spear through the ropes. The double strike puts Lun away at 4:15.
Rating: B-. Lun and Bing were just speed bumps on the way to DIY (I really hope that doesn’t catch on) vs. Revival III and that’s the kind of thing that makes this tournament awesome. Bing looked good here and certainly has some experience. I don’t know if he’s ready for a full NXT run but I’ve seen far worse.
Kota Ibushi and TJ Perkins are ready for their first round match. Perkins says if this was high school, the cool table would be Ibushi times five. Ibushi thinks his overall rating is a 99. I don’t understand what Ibushi just said. Can I get that translated to stars?
Recap of Samoa Joe vs. Shinsuke Nakamura.
Joe sees a scared man in Nakamura because he knows Joe could knock him out at any time. Nakamura knows the next NXT Champion is coming for him.
Aliyah vs. Billie Kay
Kay goes right after her to start and Aliyah’s early jawbreaker has almost no effect. A seated Blockbuster works a bit better though and an enziguri staggers Billie. Kay comes right back with a discus forearm but here’s Liv Morgan for a distraction, allowing Aliyah to grab a rollup for the pin at 1:48.
Post match the brawl is on and the Aussies leave both of them laying.
Tye Dillinger vs. Noah Potjes
Tye snapmares him down to start and that’s a ten. That’s not cool with Noah, who takes Tye into the corner for some kicks to the ribs. Tye turns it on and stomps Noah down, setting up the Tyebreaker for the pin at 1:38.
Post match, Tye says his opportunity is to get his hands on Bobby Roode, who jumps him from behind. The inverted DDT sends Tye head first into the stage.
TM61 is ready for their match with Austin Aries/Roderick Strong because they trust each other. They’re also mighty and the mighty don’t kneel.
Asuka vs. Thea Trinidad
Non-title. Asuka doesn’t waste time and starts kicking at the legs before stopping for a little dance. Thea makes the mistake of hitting Asuka with a forearm and the champ is ticked off. A kick to the chest is easily caught and a German suplex into a Fujiwara armbar makes Trinidad tap at 1:45.
William Regal comes out post match and says he’s found Asuka’s latest opponent: MICKIE JAMES! You can hear the fans gasp when she comes on screen to cut a fairly lame promo about coming to face the next star in the Women’s Revolution. Asuka is very pleased with this announcement. Mickie was a last minute replacement for Trish Stratus, who had to back out due to announcing she was pregnant, hence why Mickie wasn’t in the building.
Paul Ellering and the Authors of Pain think No Way Jose and Rich Swann will have fine futures in NXT but those futures will have to wait until after their destruction in the second round of the Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic. That match is next week.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Mustafa Ali/Lince Dorado vs. TJ Perkins/Kota Ibushi
The winners face Sanity in the second round. Perkins is announced as the Cruiserweight Champion but doesn’t have his belt for some reason. Dorado and Perkins kick us off and it’s time to flip around the ring without making much contact. A standoff gets us nowhere as Graves offers the following Michael Cole style gem: “Most of the teams that have been successful so far have been tag teams.”
Ibushi and Ali come in and the fans give Kota the kind of welcome you would expect. Ali is taken down in a test of strength but Kota can’t break his bridge. They trade some kicks to the face with Ibushi getting the better of it as we take a break. Back with Perkins rolling suplexes on Ali and grabbing the kneebar. As is custom though, the first kneebar only results in the grabbing of a rope.
Perkins heads outside and that means a big flip dive from Dorado. Back in and Ali gets two off a neckbreaker but a faceplant allows the tag off to Ibushi so things can speed up. A moonsault from Kota and a frog splash from TJ combine for two. TJ dropkicks Dorado into the ropes to set up the Wrecking Ball dropkick. The kneebar makes Ali tap at 11:39.
Rating: B. This is the kind of match that you don’t see on Raw because they have to cram in so much other stuff that there’s no time for the cruiserweights to do their thing. Well that and the Raw crowds don’t care for this stuff like the NXT fans do (just a different style of audience). Kota and Perkins are good for a dream team but I’m not sure they’re getting by Sanity.
Overall Rating: B. Of everything NXT does, this is my favorite kind of show: an hour of getting things done. This wrapped up the first round of the tournament, advanced some stories and set up some matches for next week. There’s no wasted time and everything goes so smoothly from one segment to the next. Good show here and Toronto is looking better every week.
Results
DIY b. Hoho Lun/Tian Bing – Superkick/running knee combination to Lun
Aliyah b. Billie Kay – Rollup
Tye Dillinger b. Noah Potjes – Tyebreaker
Asuka b. Thea Trinidad – Fujiwara armbar
Kota Ibushi/TJ Perkins b. Mustafa Ali/Lince Dorado – Kneebar to Ali
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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1991: It Still Makes Me Mad
Survivor Series 1991 Date: November 27, 1991
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan
This show marks a change of pace from the Survivor Series formula and it was for the better. The fans saw little to no reason to buy a pay per view with nothing on the line, so giving them a traditional main event to look forward to. The rest of the show follows the normal formula though, and thankfully there are no eggs here. Let’s get to it.
We open with a clip from Superstars with Savage being tied up in the ropes as Jake made the cobra bite Savage’s arm. Piper immediately ran down from the broadcast booth to try to help. Liz came out screaming as well. This is when Savage was a commentator and retired but looking for reinstatement.
The key thing is he had been scheduled to be on the PPV as a captain against Jake’s team, but because of this, both captains were pulled off the show with three days’ notice as mentioned above. The actual match between the two of them would be a week later on a different PPV called Tuesday in Texas, which was another $20. It felt like a total ripoff because that’s exactly what it was.
Anyway back on Superstars, Savage can’t stand up because of the snake bite but he keeps trying to fight Jake. They finally get Savage on a stretcher and start wheeling him away but he falls off. Now we get to the unintentional comedy. Savage falls off the stretcher and Vince is freaking out on commentary. The camera cuts to a crying child in the crowd and Vince loses it, audibly cracking up on air and trying to talk about “complete chaos” while clearly laughing.
We get the announcement from WWF President Jack Tunney that Savage and Roberts won’t be allowed to wrestle at Survivor Series. This is translated as “HAHA WE GOT YOUR MONEY ALREADY!”
Gorilla and Bobby talk for a bit.
Team Ric Flair vs. Team Roddy Piper
Ric Flair, Ted DiBiase, The Mountie, The Warlord
Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Virgil
It’s also back to the simple team names this year. Roddy was Flair’s first feud in the company and not only did you know the matches would be good, but the promos would be awesome too. Bret was feuding with Mountie over the Intercontinental Title, Smith was feuding with Warlord over who was stronger and Virgil was feuding with DiBiase because who else was he going to feud with?
Flair has the REAL World Title with him here, which is censored but if you know your titles, you can see a WWF Tag Team Title, which looks really weird if you’re in the arena (for clarification, the short version is Flair was NWA Champion, left the NWA, wasn’t paid back for the deposit he put down on the belt, brought it to the WWF, got sued, and couldn’t use the title in the angle they were doing anymore so they would substitute in another belt which was censored in storyline.)
Big reaction for Bret, who has finally split from Neidhart and is Intercontinental Champion as of Summerslam. DiBiase starts for his team against Piper, which is a pretty awesome match by itself. No managers are allowed at ringside this year but Sherri is there anyway. Flair sneaks in and blasts Piper in the back to give Ted an early advantage. Piper atomic drops Ted and Sherri comes in to choke him, which somehow isn’t a DQ. Piper kisses her and punches DiBiase to take over.
Sherri is sent to the back and Roddy brings in Smith. The good guys work over the arm of DiBiase with Virgil of all people getting the biggest pop. After all four go in they start going around again with all four getting in another set of shots on the arm. Bret stays in but misses a knee in the corner to put himself in trouble. They trade near falls before Bret takes Ted right back down by the arm.
DiBiase hiptosses him down and wisely tags in Flair. Bret starts with some of his favorite moves before tagging in Davey Boy to slingshot Flair into the corner. Piper wants in but Flair stops the tag. There’s the gorilla press to Flair and the tag to Piper, drawing a BIG pop from the crowd. Piper goes nuts with punches, knocking Flair to the floor for a Flair Flop.
Back inside and it’s off to Warlord who Piper wants to try a test of strength against. Piper is just playing though and brings in Smith for the big power match. Smith hits some shoulder blocks but misses a charge and it’s off to Mountie. Bret tags in and Mountie immediately hits the floor like a cowardly heel should. Instead here’s DiBiase who gets elbowed off the middle rope for two. Ted and Bret hit head to head and both guys are down.
Mountie is willing to get in there now but it’s back to Davey instead. Smith gorilla presses Mountie and pumps him about three times before slamming him down for no cover. Off to Flair who chops away at the Bulldog which doesn’t work at all. DiBiase and Flair try a double team but get double clotheslined instead. There’s the powerslam to Mountie but he’s not legal. Flair comes off the top with a shot to the back of Smith’s head for the pin and the elimination. Both guys were legal too so well done on keeping order.
Piper immediately charges in but Flair tags DiBiase back instead. Flair comes in to face a downed Piper but Ric is put in the Figure Four almost immediately. That goes nowhere so it’s off to Mountie vs. Virgil and Mountie can’t get a tag out from anyone. You know, because everyone is afraid of Virgil. Flair comes in and has zero luck so it’s DiBiase vs. Virgil again. Ted powerslams him down and it’s immediately back to the Warlord.
Virgil gets sent to the floor and Flair whips him into the steps, with Virgil doing an awful job of pretending to slam into them. The Warlord’s full nelson goes on but everything breaks down and Bret comes off the top to take out Warlord, giving the illegal Piper the pin to tie us up at 3-3. It’s Piper vs. DiBiase now before Virgil is quickly tagged in. Virgil slaps the Million Dollar Dream on DiBiase but Ted sends him into the buckle to escape.
Here’s Flair again with a belly to back suplex before it’s back to Mountie. Every remaining heel takes their shots on Virgil in what is likely the best possible option. Flair covers him for two and puts his feet on the ropes because that’s what Flair does. DiBiase comes in and ducks his head, only to get caught by a swinging neckbreaker. There’s the hot tag to Piper who no sells everything Flair throws at him. Everything breaks down and Flair is sent to the floor. That’s important because the referee disqualifies EVERYONE in the ring, but Flair was outside and is the sole survivor.
Rating: B. Gah this was going AWESOME until the pretty lame ending. Having Flair be the sole survivor is a smart move though as it makes the fans hate him even more. This was a GREAT setup though and was on pace to be a classic before the ending. To be fair though, at the pace they were going the match would have been an hour long if they were going to do a full version. Still though, what we got was very good.
Gene is on the platform and brings out Savage to talk about Jake, because we can’t have the match on this show so let’s talk about it instead. Savage talks about being bitten by the snake and being able to see and hear Liz crying, which is the worst thing Jake could do. He promises to be all over Jake like melted butter. Oh man stuff just got REAL. Liz comes out in what is presented as a bigger deal than it should be. As usual, she has nothing to say.
Gorilla thinks Tuesday in Texas may be on TV! I think he might be wrong here.
Team Mustafa vs. Team Slaughter
Colonel Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules
Sgt. Slaughter, Tito Santana, Jim Duggan, Texas Tornado
Skinner is an alligator wrestler from the Everglades and Berzerker is a crazy viking who tried to stab Undertaker with a sword. A lot of these guys are on their way out. Hercules would be in WCW by May, Tornado would job to the stars until leaving in July, as would Mustafa (Iron Sheik). The rest of the guys would do nothing of note for the rest of their time in the company.
Kerry looks high as a kite and almost falls off the apron getting into the ring. This is pretty recently after Slaughter’s face turn as he was a heel at Summerslam. This isn’t exactly the most talent laden match ever and the only feud is Slaughter vs. Mustafa due to their recent split.
Tito and Skinner start with Santana taking over with a headlock. There’s the flying forearm out of nowhere and Skinner hits the floor without a cover. Off to Berzerker vs. Tornado, which would work a lot better down in Dallas. Berzerker misses a dropkick and it’s off to Mustafa. After some very brief offense, Kerry tumbles to his corner and brings in Duggan to face Hercules, which took place in the first ever match at Survivor Series.
Duggan gets taken down by double and triple teaming and it’s off to Mustafa. He loads up his curled boots and does nothing with them. Duggan pounds away and backdrops Mustafa down before the hot tag to Slaughter. The big showdown is an atomic drop and a clothesline to Mustafa for the elimination.
Berzerker comes in with some clotheslines and a kick to Slaughter’s fat gut. A boot to Slaughter’s face puts him down and it’s off to Hercules for some two counts. Back to the viking who gets crotched on the top rope and kicked in the legs. Off to Duggan who clotheslines Berzerker to the floor, only to have Berzerker come back in for a backdrop back out to the floor. Tornado comes in and pounds away on him before it’s off to Hercules again.
Tito gets a blind tag and hits a forearm to the back of the head (El Paso Del Muerte) for the pin and the elimination. Skinner comes in as it’s 4-2. I don’t see this going well for Mustafa’s team. A blind tag brings in Slaughter who rolls up Skinner for the elimination. Slaughter whips Berzerker into Duggan’s clothesline for the elimination and the win.
Rating: F. The match was awful, it was never in doubt, and the biggest deal on the heel team was Skinner, who would get an Intercontinental Title shot soon after this. What a horrible match and one of the most worthless ones in the history of the show so far, which is covering quite a bit of ground. Nothing to see here at all.
Here’s Jake to plug Tuesday in Texas some more. To be fair, Jake saying “trust me” in that evil voice of his was amazing. Jake swears he didn’t know that the snake had venom in it still but making Liz cry excited him. God has told Jake that God doesn’t like Okerlund, so let’s blame everyone but Jake. I said he was awesome, not that he made sense. No reptiles are allowed at the match between Savage and Roberts. He wants to kiss Liz and that’s about it.
We recap Hogan vs. Undertaker. Flair confronted Hogan in the Funeral Parlor (Undertaker’s interview segment) and went off on him about hearing about Hogan for years. Now Flair is here and wants to know what Hogan is going to do about it. Hogan pulled off the shirt and Undertaker came out of a standing casket behind Hulk and hit him with the urn. Piper and Savage ran out of the broadcast booth with chairs but Undertaker literally swatted away Savage’s swing. Undertaker rips Hogan’s cross off ala Andre in 87 and leaves.
WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan
Undertaker is “undefeated” here, which means overseas tours and house shows don’t count because Tito Santana beat him in Spain and Warrior beat him on a bunch of house shows. Feeling out process to start with no one being able to get a real advantage. Undertaker shoulders Hogan and Hulk regroups a bit while Undertaker reaches to the urn. Back in and Undertaker chokes away in the corner in a shot you see in a lot of his video packages.
Bearer chokes Hogan a bit and Undertaker slams him. A big elbow misses and the place cheers loudly. Hulk pounds away but he can’t put him down. A slam doesn’t work, nor does an elbow to the head. Hogan clotheslines UNdertaker to the floor where the Dead Man lands on his feet and pulls Hogan outside. Back in and Undertaker chokes away some more and Bearer does the same. Undertaker starts smothering him as you can see the Hogan super fan, a guy who dressed up like Hulk (including yellow trunks) sitting in the front row and freaking out.
This hold goes on for a good while, which is just Undertaker having his hand on Hogan’s face and doing nothing else. By long I mean like two and a half minutes. When the whole match is only thirteen minutes, that’s quite the stretch. Hogan comes back with some shoulder blocks that don’t do much, only to haveUndertaker clothesline him down again. There’s the Tombstone but Hogan is up before a cover. He pounds away on Undertaker and knocks him down to one knee which is a very rare sight.
Hogan gets a good slam as Flair is on his way to the ring in his spiffy black and white robs. Hogan takes out Flair with a right hand and big boots Undertaker, only to have Bearer grab his leg. Undertaker loads up the Tombstone as Flair slides in a chair. The piledriver on the chair gives us a new champion and a decisive face pop for the Dead Man. Undertaker holding the title like it’s a coupon for a free coffee at a gas station is a nice touch.
Rating: D. Yeah this match completely sucked but we have a new champion and a reason to watch Flair vs. Hogan, which never happened for various reason. Hogan would beat Undertaker for the title at Tuesday in Texas six days later, but the title would be held up and decided in the Rumble, where Flair would win it and set up Wrestlemania. Bad match, but a BIG moment.
People come out to check on Hogan as Gorilla rips into Flair. Hogan takes a while to leave, likely to let the fans get over some of their shock.
Roddy is in the back and goes on a big rant against Tunney and Flair andUndertaker.
Flair and Perfect say they told us this would happen and now they’ve been proven right. Flair is the REAL World Champion now.
Intermission, which means we see a graphic for fifteen minutes.Seriously, there’s nothing other than a graphic and a countdown clock.
Gene recaps what’s happened so far in case someone ordered the PPV halfway through for some reason.
The Natural Disasters and IRS are ready for the Legion of Doom and Boss Man. That’s the main event. They’re not even hiding the ripping off of the fans anymore.
Legion of Doom and the Boss Man are ready too. Seriously there’s nothing else to say here. They say exactly what you would expect them to say and nothing else. Hawk gets ready to do the WHAT A RUSH line but as he loads it up, Sean interrupts him to say Gene is with Jack Tunney. Hawk gives him a look that would stop a tank and says his catchphrase, then lets Sean throw it to Gene.
Tunney announces Hogan vs. Undertaker II at Tuesday in Texas. He’ll be at ringside as well, driving the boredom levels shoot through the roof, if that’s even possible.
Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers
Nasty Boys, Beverly Brothers
Rockers, Bushwhackers
This is right before the Rockers split and they’re already having issues. This is regular rules, which means individual eliminations and not one loss means both team members are gone. Butch and Knobbs (Brian Knobbs of the Nasty Boys along with Jerry Sags) get things going as Gorilla and Bobby talk about Hogan vs. Undertaker II. Butch hits a running knee lift and it’s off to Luke. Luke and Butch take over on the Nasty Boys with a pair of double clotheslines.
The Beverly Brothers come in and do about as well as Knobbs and Sags with both Brothers taking a Battering Ram. The Rockers double dropkick the Nasty Boys and the good guys have cleared the ring. It’s Shawn vs. Beau Beverly (the other is Blake) now as the announcers debate which guy on either team is the brains. A backbreaker puts Shawn down and it’s back to Knobbs. Luke comes in and avoids a splash in the corner but whacks his arms too much, allowing Knobbs to hit a middle rope clothesline for the elimination.
Off to Shawn vs. Sags with Jerry suplexing him down. Gorilla talks about how tonight will culminate at Tuesday in Texas. Some annoying fan stands up and poses for the camera so the shots keep cutting away a lot. The Rockers work on Sags’ arm before it’s off to Blake. Gorilla somehow can’t tell the Rockers apart, even though they pretty much look nothing alike and have been together for years now.
A superkick puts Blake down but he comes back with knees in the corner. Marty comes off the middle rope and shoves the referee for no apparent reason. It doesn’t go anywhere so I guess it was a mistake. Off to Beau who doesn’t do much other than allow a tag to Butch who cleans house. The Beverlies double team him with a backdrop into a facejam for the pin and the elimination.
It’s Nasty Boys/Beverly Brothers vs. Rockers now with Marty coming in again. Marty monkey flips and hurricanranas Beau down for two as Heenan and Gorilla trade statements of excitement. An enziguri puts Beau down again and it’s off to an armbar. It’s also off to Shawn, who doesn’t do as well as you would expect against one of the Beverly Brothers. Off to Blake who jumps over Beau and lands on Shawn’s back in a move later used by the World’s Greatest Tag Team.
Out of nowhere Shawn grabs a backslide on Beau for the pin to make it 3-1. Sags is in next as Gorilla thinks Marty should reach further for a tag. Even though the Rockers would split less than a month later, it wasn’t clear yet who would have gotten the super push. The Nasty Boys head to the floor and Shawn clotheslines Sags off the apron and superkicks Knobbs down. Back in and Sags takes over again. Marty’s eyes are just gone and he looks awful.
Blake comes in again and gets kicked in the face, allowing for a falling tag to Marty. A big jumping back elbow takes Knobbs down and a snapmare gets two. Knobbs takes Jannetty down again and Heenan talks about Tuesday in Texas. Off to Sags with a powerslam and a belly to back suplex before it’s back to Knobbs. Marty gets his knees up to stop a middle rope splash and there’s the tag to Shawn. Everything breaks down and Marty swings Sags’ feet into Shawn’s face, resulting in Knobbs rolling Michaels up for the pin.
That leaves us with Marty vs. Blake and the Nastys. Shawn freaks out on him before he leaves too to even further tease the tension. Marty starts with Knobbs and hits a middle rope bulldog but Jerry takes him down almost immediately and knocks him to the floor. A powerslam from Blake puts Marty down and the Nastys head to the floor. Jannetty dives on both of them and slams Blake’s face into the mat. Marty hooks a terrible looking small package on Sags but Knobbs rolls them over to give Jerry the final eliminating pin.
Rating: D. Man alive this was a long match. That’s the problem the rest of this show has created: there’s nothing else worth watching for the rest of the night and now they’re just filling in time to say that you’re getting a PPV that means something, when really you need to see the sequel to get the full thing.
Gorilla and Bobby plug Tuesday in Texas again.
Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters
This is your main event people. Let that sink in for a minute. The LOD are the Tag Team Champions and IRS (Irwin R. Schyster, a tax auditor) and Boss Man are having a worthless midcard feud. Boss Man and IRS start things off with the tax man getting thrown all over the place. Off to Animal vs. Earthquake which wakes the crowd up a bit.
They collide and Animal’s cross body is caught in a backbreaker in an impressive display of strength from Earthquake. Back to IRS to face Hawk with the latter working on the arm. Typhoon gets the tag, only to have IRS thrown at him by Hawk. Off to Earthquake who carries Hawk to the heel corner. IRS and Boss Man come in again and it’s a briefcase shot to Boss Man’s head for the elimination.
It’s Typhoon vs. Animal now and the Disasters double team Animal in the corner. Earthquake suplexes him down as Monsoon talks about Bobo Brazil. IRS hits a top rope right hand for two and Typhoon puts on a bearhug. Animal escapes and hits a clothesline before tagging in Hawk. IRS misses a briefcase shot to the head and hits Typhoon by mistake, giving Hawk the easy pin.
Earthquake wants to fight IRS now but walks off with Typhoon instead, making it the LOD vs. IRS. Hawk powerslams IRS down but a charge goes shoulder first into the post. Hawk gets sent face first into the steps as we continue to fill time by having IRS look like he has a chance. We hit the chinlock as the announcers talk about Thanksgiving dinner. A not very hot tag brings in Animal who cleans whatever is left in the house. IRS tries to walk out but runs into Boss Man in the aisle. Back in and Hawk hits a top rope clothesline for the win.
Rating: D+. We go from Hogan vs. Andre II to this in five years? That should give you a good idea as to what you’ve got going on with this show. The match was nothing and there was no reason to get excited about it, because the whole reason the match was happening had been postponed to Tuesday. In Texas.
Hogan won’t talk to the cameras about what happened.
Gene is in the bowels of the building with Bearer and Undertaker. Hogan will rest in peace. In Texas. They look in a casket to end the show.
Overall Rating: D-. Let’s take a look at what we had on this show: a really good opener, a horrible second match, a bad yet historic third match, a bad fourth match, and a worthless fifth match. This is all interspersed with a bunch of commercials for Tuesday in Texas, which is possibly the biggest bait and switch in company history. This show made me mad because it’s a big flip off to the fans, and that’s not acceptable. Watch the opener and that’s about it.
Ratings Comparison
Team Flair vs. Team Piper
Original: A-
Redo: B
Team Slaughter vs. Team Mustafa
Original: F
Redo: F
Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan
Original: C-
Redo: D
Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers
Original: D
Redo: D
Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters
Original: D
Redo: D+
Overall Rating:
Original: D+
Redo: D-
A little worse this time, but the same problems still plague this show. Screw you Vince.
Survivor Series Count-Up – 1990: For Whom The Debuting Bell Tolls
Survivor Series 1990 Date: November 22, 1990
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper
This is a somewhat different show that in recent years as we have a main event of sorts. It was never tried again and that’s probably the best idea. It’s called the Grand Finale Match of Survival in which the survivors of each team meet in one final Survivor Series match. The winners get absolutely nothing, which continues to prove that these shows are pretty worthless. Let’s get to it.
Sean Mooney welcomes us to the show and talks about the Grand Finale. He’s standing in front of a giant egg which apparently is going to hatch because of the heat from the crowd. Nothing good can possibly come from this.
The nifty squares intro theme open things up again.
Gorilla and Piper chat about the show for a bit.
The Warriors vs. The Perfect Team
The Warriors: Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion of Doom
The Perfect Team: Mr. Perfect, Demolition
This is the three man version of Demolition, including Crush. Perfect is feuding with Tornado (Kerry Von Erich, the Intercontinental Champion) and the LOD is feuding with Demolition after the LOD cost them the titles. Warrior, the WWF World Champion, is there because he has nothing else to do save for a minor feud with Perfect. His team is in the back before the match and says they’ll win.
The name Warriors is appropriate as you have the Ultimate Warrior, the Modern Day Warrior (Von Erich’s nickname in WCCW) and the Road Warriors (the LOD’s NWA name). I’ll never understand why the LOD and Demolition never had a big proper match. Perfect immediately goes to the apron and lets part of Demolition start. It’s Animal vs. Smash first in major power battle. They get to the fight immediately with Animal taking him to the mat. Animal throws him into Hawk for a right hand and the other Warriors get in a shot as well.
Smash comes back with a powerslam for two and it’s off to Perfect. That doesn’t last long so here’s Smash again, and he walks right into a powerslam. Everything breaks down and the Warriors clear the ring. Tornado comes in to face Smash who is taking a beating in this so far. Off to Ax who has much better luck for about ten seconds. There’s the Claw from Tornado but for some reason Warrior gets the tag and hits a series of awkward looking shoulder blocks before finishing Ax with the splash.
Crush immediately comes in to jump Warrior and take over. Smash gets in a slam on Warrior and Crush drops a top rope knee for two. Perfect is freaking out in his trademark over the top style. Warrior gets up a boot in the corner and clotheslines Crush down. Off to Hawk who always looks like he could murder someone in the ring. Perfect tries him out and is immediately slammed down.
Hawk counters a reversal to send Perfect into the corner but his shoulder goes into the post HARD to give the evil ones the advantage. Demolition pounds away on him but Hawk punches right back. A big flying shoulder puts Smash down and Hawk doesn’t tag when he has the chance. The top rope clothesline kills Smash and everything breaks down. Hawk kicks the referee and somehow this disqualifies not only Hawk but also Animal, Smash and Crush. We’re down to Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado.
It’s going to be Warrior starting the handicap match but Perfect wants Tornado instead. Perfect immediately jumps him and is clotheslined out almost immediately after the jumping. Warrior bangs Perfect’s head into Heenan’s and sends Bobby into the front row. Tornado charges at Perfect and slams into the post to give Perfect the advantage for a bit. A buckle gets exposed somewhere in there and Tornado’s face goes into the steel, setting up the PerfectPlex to make it one on one.
Perfect tries the PerfectPlex again on Warrior which doesn’t work at all. Instead he hammers Warrior down and hits a great looking dropkick for two. Having Perfect run things out there for as long as possible is the best idea they’ve got. Warrior starts grabbing the ropes and shrugging off all the offense from Perfect. A shoulder block and the splash get the final pin for the Ultimate one.
Rating: D. This was probably the worst Survivor Series match so far in the four years they’ve been running this show. Not only was the match lopsided from the start, but half of the people in it were gone seven minutes in. Perfect never had a chance and Warrior had no reason to be in this match at all.
Ted DiBiase has a mystery partner for his match. Oh boy does he ever.
Million Dollar Team vs. Dream Team
Million Dollar Team: Ted DiBiase, Rhythm and Blues, ???
Dream Team: Dusty Rhodes, Koko B. Ware, Hart Foundation
Rhythm and Blues are Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine and they’ve been challenging the Hart Foundation for the Tag Team Titles. Dusty and DiBiase are feuding for obvious character reasons. Now we get to the legendary part of the match: the mystery partner. DiBiase gets on the mic and introduces for the first time ever…..THE UNDERTAKER. Who on earth would have imagined what this guy would become over the next twenty two years? Unreal indeed. The look on Undertaker’s face is eerie and he stands there like a zombie to make it even better. Undertaker has his own manager here in the form of Brother Love.
Quick sidebar: the Undertaker is probably the greatest example ever of someone being the only person that could pull off his character. Mark Calaway is PERFECT as the Undertaker with the look and the size and the dead looking eyes and the tattoos and everything like that. Before this he was just Mean Mark Callous in WCW and was a generic big villain. Sometimes it’s about finding what works and Undertaker has worked for a very long time. Also a bit of trivia: he debuted at a Superstars taping three days before this under the name Kane the Undertaker.
Undertaker and Bret start with the newcomer pounding the tar out of Bret. Well if you want to make someone look like a killer, call Bret Hart. Bret hits the ropes and charges at Undertaker, only to get caught by the throat and slammed down. It was more like a clothesline that Undertaker went to the mat with than the usual chokeslam here but he did have Bret by the throat.
Off to Neidhart who can’t move Undertaker in the slightest and gets slammed for trying. Jim looked TERRIFIED and tags out to Koko, who is too stupid to be afraid. Koko misses a charge and clotheslines himself on the top. The Tombstone (I believed named by Gorilla on the spot here) debuts but isn’t exactly the famous version yet, as Undertaker has both of Koko’s legs on one side of his head and covers with the folded arms but from the sides. It looked and sounded great though.
Bret comes in and hammers on Undertaker who just stares at him. Undertaker tags in Valentine and gives one of the most evil glares you’ll ever see at Bret. Off to Dusty who starts gyrating. They chop it out in the corner and it’s off to Neidhart. The Foundation take their turns working over Valentine’s arm but Greg gets a knee up in the corner. Off to Honky who is rapidly on his way out of the company. Bret makes a blind tag to Neidhart who sneaks in and powerslams Honky out.
DiBiase comes in to jump Neidhart but it’s quickly off to Dusty for the big showdown. Dusty tags out to Neidhart quickly but Virgil trips Jim up, allowing DiBiase to clothesline Neidhart for the pin. Here’s Bret again who pounds away on DiBiase and it’s back to Rhodes for more of the same. Back to Undertaker who gets some HEIGHT on a jumping stomp to the back of Dusty’s head.
Undertaker chokes Bret in the corner and somehow shows no emotion while at the same time looking angrier than any wrestler I’ve ever seen. Bret fights the now legal DiBiase out of the corner and it’s off to Dusty. Undertaker comes in, goes up, walks (a little way) down the rope with no one to hold onto, and hits a double ax to eliminate Dusty. Brother Love stomps on Dusty a bit so Dusty chases him off. Undertaker stalks Dusty to the back to get counted out, which is the only thing they could have done with him here.
Back in the ring Bret rolls up Valentine very quickly and it’s DiBiase vs. Hart. Bret pounds on DiBiase and atomic drops him to the floor, followed by a pescado to take Ted out again. DiBiase’s shoulder goes into the post and his head goes into the steps and they head back inside. They slug it out but DiBiase sends him chest first into the buckle to take over.
A quick backslide gets two for Hart and now it’s time for a classic: Bret trips over DiBiase and fakes a knee injury, resulting in a small package for two. Virgil interference messes up and another rollup gets two for Bret. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two for Hart but DiBiase rolls through a cross body for the pin.
Rating: C+. This is a very interesting match as you could see stars being made and stars going away. DiBiase clearly didn’t mean as much as he used to and would shift into a tag team run soon after this. Dusty would be gone in January as would Honky. On the other hand you can see the rise of Bret Hart on the horizon as the crowd was LOSING IT over those near falls at the end. Oh and the Undertaker. That’s kind of a big deal.
The Vipers (Jake Roberts’ team) are ready for Martel’s team. Why they’re in the shower I’m not sure.
The Vipers vs. The Visionaries
The Vipers: Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka
The Visionaries: Rick Martel, Warlord, Power and Glory
Power and Glory are Hercules and Paul Roma. This is built around Martel vs. Roberts, which is based on Martel blinding Jake with cologne and Jake not having full vision yet. This was a BIG feud which they screwed up with a horrible match at Wrestlemania VII. It wasn’t that the wrestling was bad, but that it was a blindfold match and they spent about 2 minutes in contact with each other.
Marty and Warlord start as Piper is singing I Am The Walrus. Warlord powers Marty around but misses a charge in the corner. Warlord is now out of his Powers of Pain phase and is now shiny and bald. Both Rockers try to outmaneuver him but it just results in bringing in Martel. Shawn handles him with ease and brings in Jake, causing Martel to scamper away.
It’s Roma instead and Jake picks him apart like he’s not even there. He works on Roma’s arm and brings in Snuka to keep it up, but the afro apparently weighs down Snuka’s brain to the point where he can’t maintain a wristlock. Off to Hercules who gets chopped down so it’s back to Warlord instead. Snuka tries his stuff but when that gets nowhere it’s off to Marty. Jannetty opts for speed but jumps into a great looking powerslam for the pin.
Off to Shawn whose leapfrog is caught but he hurricanranas Warlord down instead. Jake comes in and the fans wants a DDT. A bunch of clotheslines take Warlord down and it’s back to Shawn. Roma comes in with an elbow drop to the back of the head as Gorilla talks anatomy. Warlord comes in and backdrops Shawn before tagging out to Hercules. Martel comes in just as fast and drops a knee for two. Roma sends Shawn into the corner and Shawn of course sells it like he’s dead. Martel’s shoulder hits the post and here’s Snuka again.
A flying headbutt to the standing Martel gets two, but Rick grabs a small package for the pin out of nowhere. Jake comes in again and Martel immediately runs and brings in Hercules. Roberts is getting frustrated because he can’t get his hands on Martel, but he still manages a knee lift and a failed DDT attempt. Jake starts pounding away on Hercules but Martel clotheslines him down instead.
Roma comes in for some stomping but he misses a middle rope punch. There’s the hot tag to Shawn who suplexes Roma down and hits a middle rope elbow for two. Shawn does what he can but Hercules comes in off a blind tag and pounds away even more. Power and Glory hook up the Powerplex (superplex from Hercules immediately followed by a top rope splash from Roma) eliminates Shawn and it’s 4-1. It’s Hercules in first but Jake is in trouble. Warlord comes in with a bearhug but Jake escapes and DDTs him out of nowhere. Jake says screw it and gets the snake out. He chases Martel to the back for the countout loss.
Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to see here but other than Jake vs. Martel, there was nothing here at all. To the best of my knowledge, Warlord and Snuka never interacted before or after this so they were just tacked on. The Rockers and Power and Glory had fought at Summerslam but that’s about it. The Visionaries are the first ever team to survive intact.
The Hulkamaniacs are ready for the Natural Disasters. This is a continuation of Hogan vs. Earthquake, with Hulk’s team facing Earthquake and Jimmy Hart’s and Bobby Heenan’s cronies. Hogan says they can go get rid of Sadaam Hussein. Remember that this is during the Gulf War.
Hulkamaniacs: Hulk Hogan, Big Boss Man, Tugboat, Jim Duggan
There’s some actual drama here as Hogan hadn’t pinned Earthquake before this and the other guys balance out somewhat well. Boss Man and Bravo are the captains’ friends at the moment and the other four are really just filling in space. Tugboat is a big guy called the Sailing Superstar. You can’t get much lamer than that. Haku vs. Duggan start us off as the announcers talk about the Grand Finale. It’s such a different time when they automatically know who is going to be on what side. Today you would be waiting on the swerve. Duggan pounds away on Haku and a clothesline gets two.
Bravo and Barbarian come in to get some shots but it’s quickly off to Haku vs. Boss Man. Haku dropkicks him down for two but the Boss Man Slam eliminates Haku quick. Barbarian comes in next and Boss Man runs him over. Heenan gets taken off the apron and Boss Man punches Barbarian a bit before walking into a suplex. Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Duggan vs. Bravo. Scratch that as Earthquake makes a blind tag and crushes Duggan in the corner. Duggan keeps trying to knock Earthquake down but Jimmy low bridges him. Duggan brings the board in with him and hits Earthquake for the DQ.
It’s Hogan vs. Earthquake but Hulk beats up all three guys because he can. Hogan easily slams Earthquake and fires off ten punches in the corner. Earthquake comes back with a powerslam and tags in Bravo who stomps away, only to get small packaged for the pin. There’s the tag to Boss Man who hits his rapid fire punches in the corner. Boss Man goes up for a cross body and oh my goodness Earthquake caught him. That is SCARY power. Hogan shoves Boss Man on top of Earthquake for two but Barbarian kicks Boss Man in the back to put him down. An elbow from Earthquake eliminates Boss Man.
Hogan vs. Earthquake again and Hulk tries to drop the big guy. Hulk tries another slam but can’t get Earthquake up. The third attempt results in Earthquake falling on Hogan for two. Hulk avoids an elbow and there’s the tag to Tugboat, causing everyone to shout TOOOOT which sounds like booing.
Hogan pulls Earthquake to the floor and Earthquake and Tugboat get counted out. That leaves Hogan vs. Barbarian and things don’t look good for the Disasters. Barbarian goes after Hogan on the floor and doesn’t hit a piledriver well at all. It gets two and they clothesline each other. Barbarian hits the top rope clothesline, but it’s Hulk Up, legdrop and we’re done.
Rating: C-. This was a lot more fast paced and energetic than you would expect. The continued practice of just teasing the encounter that the match is based on is getting REALLY old though as I guess they want to preserve the house show draws, because who would want to see a feud continue after a single match right? My goodness have things changed in the last twenty years.
Hogan beats up Heenan post match and poses. Piper cheering for Hogan is just wrong.
Some fans talk and have little to say. Well one fan signs who he likes which is cool.
Here’s Savage with something to say. He’s still the King at this point which has been going on for awhile. Savage doesn’t have a match tonight and he doesn’t like not being recognized as the future WWF World Champion. He promises to take his title back from Warrior and talks about Sherri slapping The Ultimate Chicken a few times. There’s nothing of note here but it reinforced that they have issues. That’s something you never hear today: promos to just remind you that people don’t like each other.
Alliance vs. Mercenaries
Alliance: Nikolai Volkoff, Bushwhackers, Tito Santana
Mercenaries: Sgt. Slaughter, Boris Zhukov, Orient Express
This is during the Iraqi Sympathizer period for Slaughter and the idea here is military themed with the other four being a group of international wrestlers banding together to fight Slaughter and company. Before the match, Slaughter tells Gene about having a Thanksgiving dinner with the Mercenaries and not having to be inconvenienced by being in the desert. That’s better than being in the Army and eating K-Rations right? This was a pretty edgy angle at the time. Questionable but edgy. This interview is in the arena with the Mercenaries’ music playing. That must be a pretty dull period for the crowd.
The Bushwhackers torment Boris to start and the flying forearm from Tito eliminates him in about 20 seconds. Sato (half of the Orient Express, along with Tanaka) comes in and is accidentally superkicked by Tanaka. The Battering Ram puts out Sato and it’s 4-2 inside of two minutes. Tanaka comes in and the forearm from Tito makes it 4-1 in less than 2:15. Volkoff pounds on Slaughter with his usual stuff but gets punched in the face for his efforts as Slaughter takes over.
After a long beating, Slaughter eliminates Volkoff with an elbow. There were about three minutes of beating in between there but there was absolutely nothing of note to talk about. The Bushwhackers double team Sarge for a bit but Slaughter beats them down and gutbusts Luke for an elimination. A clothesline takes out Butch about 30 seconds later and it’s one on one.
Tito immediately dropkicks Slaughter into the post and things speed up with by far the two most talented guys in the match in there. Tito hits a top rope forearm for two and stomps away even faster. Piper is trying not to curse and Slaughter slams Santana’s head into the mat. A neckbreaker and backbreaker combine for two on Santana.
After some more beating, Tito gets a quick forearm attempt but hits the referee by mistake. The forearm hits the second time but General Adnan (Slaughter’s manager/boss) hits Santana with the flag and Slaughter puts on the Camel Clutch. The referee saw the flag though and it’s a DQ win for Tito.
Rating: D-. Well that…..happened I guess. They went through seven eliminations inside of eleven minutes and the match was awful. Basically this could have been Slaughter vs. either Volkoff or Santana and gotten the same payoff. I have no idea what they were going for here, but my guess is that they had nothing else to fill in fifteen minutes with (the show only runs two hours and twenty minutes and we’ve got something else to go before the main event).
DiBiase and the Visionaries say Warrior and Hogan (no mention of Santana) can’t work together. Sean says it’s going to be these five against Warrior and Hogan.
It’s time for the Egg Hatching. Gene talks about the fans being hot tonight and the egg starts to hatch. There’s no way around this: it’s the Gobbledygooker, a humanoid turkey who square dances to Turkey in the Straw with Gene Okerlund, does a bunch of flips and is played by the WAY too talented for this Hector Guerrero. The fans IMMEDIATELY start booing when it hatches, as there is absolutely no point to it. This was rumored to be anything from Undertaker to Flair (about a year early for him) to some Playboy Playmate. Total time spent on this: over seven minutes.
Hogan, Warrior and Santana are ready.
Hulk Hogan/Tito Santana/Ultimate Warrior vs. Ted DiBiase/Visionaries
Oddly enough, Hogan comes out before Tito. Tito and Warlord start and a forearm ends Warlord in less than 30 seconds. Roma immediately powerslams Tito and brings in DiBiase. My goodness a 20 minute Santana vs. DiBiase match would freaking rock. Tito misses another forearm and a hot shot gives DiBiase the pin.
Hogan comes in and beats the tar out of DiBiase for a bit before ducking his head too early. A kick to Hogan’s face slows him down and it’s off to Roma for a top rope forearm for two. Back to Hercules who pounds away on Hulk even more, followed by the same from DiBiase. The Powerplex hits Hogan…..and has basically no effect. Roma is immediately pinned by a clothesline and it’s 3-2.
Martel comes in to beat on Hogan but gets kicked in the face. Off to Warrior who fires off a bunch of kicks in the corner and backdrops Martel. Rick tries to hit him in the head and boy are you really that dumb? Hogan knocks Martel to the floor and Rick walks off for the countout. Hogan beats on DiBiase a bit and there’s the legdrop. Warrior beats Hercules with the splash about 40 seconds later to win.
Rating: D. What in the world was the point of this? I mean……am I watching a house show? These are the kind of matches you hear about at the end of shows to send the fans home happy, not to main event a PPV. It was clear that this show wasn’t needed and that something had to be done.
Posing ends the show.
Overall Rating: F. This show has some moments of ok, but can you imagine PAYING for this show? Undertaker debuts here but no one had any idea what that would mean. Nothing is changed at all, mainly because the company was afraid no one would want to see the house show matches after this.
This show runs two hours and eighteen minutes and nearly eight minutes of that are the Gobbledygooker. On top of that the main event runs about ten minutes in total counting entrances. You’re looking at about two hours for the non main event stuff and that’s ridiculous for a PPV. This is another show that doesn’t need to exist.
Smackdown – October 25, 2016: Just Like Rip and Randy
Smackdown Date: October 25, 2016
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga
It’s another big week as we have a pay per view rematch from Backlash with AJ Styles facing Dean Ambrose in a non-title match. If Ambrose wins, he gets a title shot at some point in the future. There’s a good chance James Ellsworth will get involved to possibly wrap up his story. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of last week’s AJ Styles vs. James Ellsworth title match with Ellsworth winning via DQ. After the match, Daniel Bryan made Styles vs. Dean Ambrose for this week.
Ambrose is in the back talking about his match with Styles. Ellsworth comes up and offers to help but Dean thinks it’s better for him to stay in the back.
Kane vs. Bray Wyatt
No DQ. They trade big uppercuts and clotheslines to start until Kane takes it outside and whips Bray into the steps. The chokeslam through the announcers’ table is loaded up but Luke Harper appears and gives Kane the discus lariat. Back from a break with Kane fighting out of a chinlock (I thought these guys were different.) and stopping a charge with a big boot. Harper saves his boss from the chokeslam and Bray’s release Rock Bottom gets two. Harper gets involved again so here’s Randy Orton……to RKO Kane and freak the heck out of Wyatt. Bray covers Kane for the pin at 10:37.
Rating: C-. This was much more of an angle than a match but again, the difference from Raw is this is interesting. I’m curious to see where this is going while most of the stuff on Monday comes and goes with little interest. My guess is Orton trying to get into Wyatt’s head instead of a heel turn, which works for me as I’ve always liked Orton vs. Kane matches.
Styles is ready to take care of Dean and warns Ellsworth to stay away. AJ also says Ellsworth looks like an action figure that melted in a microwave. That’s about as accurate as you’re going to get with him.
Becky Lynch makes her return from injury but is immediately cut off by Alexa Bliss. She accuses Becky of leaving out of fear of losing her precious title. The Cinderella story is ending soon and Bliss will get the title that she deserves. The fight is on but Bliss lays her out and grabs a conveniently placed can of spray paint. A yellow streak goes up the champ’s back and Bliss smirks as she leaves.
Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Ascension vs. Hype Bros
The winners are on the Survivor Series team along with Heath Slater and Rhyno, who were granted an automatic spot. Mojo, a former Green Bay Packer, is VERY popular here as he starts with Viktor. Ryder is quickly in for a dropkick to knock Konnor off the apron, only to have Ascension take over with some double teaming. Too much trash talking allows Ryder to get in a jawbreaker but a spinebuster stops a hot tag. A middle rope elbow misses though and the hot tag brings in Rawley for his corner splashes. Viktor misses a charge and the Hype Ryder sends the Bros to Survivor Series at 3:50.
Rating: C. Well were you really expecting anything else? Ascension might have won one tag match in a year (on Superstars in February over Fandango and Damien Sandow) so it’s kind of hard to buy that they’re going to win here, or anywhere for that matter. The Hype Bros are already more successful than I was expecting and that’s cool to see.
Orton says if you can’t beat them, join them.
Bryan is talking about the need for strong team captains when Natalya comes in. She’s been thinking about the Raw women’s team and thinks she should be captain. Daniel isn’t sure but makes Natalya’s match against Nikki Bella for the captain’s spot. However, the loser is off the team entirely.
Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Nikki Bella vs. Natalya
Nikki actually tries an Oklahoma roll to start but makes the mistake of going outside, allowing Nattie By Nature to get two. An abdominal stretch and some stomps to the ribs set up the Sharpshooter but Nikki dives over to the ropes. Natalya misses a legdrop and something like the Beautiful Disaster gets two. The surfboard goes on but Nikki powers out and grabs an STF (prepare to hear about her being a great submission wrestler) for the tap out at 6:07.
Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one but there’s really no way around Nikki being the captain. Natalya is just there while Bella has been one of the top stars in the division for a long time now. The STF is a nice change of pace for Nikki and she even added a little twist by hooking the foot and chin at the same time.
Carmella attacks Nikki after the match and gives her a Bella Buster.
Ambrose is ready to win because karma is a bad thing.
Here are Miz, Maryse and the Spirit Squad to talk about the Intercontinental Title. Miz feels sorry for the legends that fought to make the Intercontinental Title so important. As Miz talks about Pat Patterson, here comes Dolph Ziggler to say he wants to fight. The Squad is ready so Heath Slater and Rhyno come out to even the odds. Maryse gets in the way and insults are exchanged. Miz suggests that the Spirit Squad get a Tag Team Title shot but thinks Heath is too scared. Rhyno accepts for the team and we’re got a title match.
Tag Team Titles: Spirit Squad vs. Heath Slater/Rhyno
Miz and Ziggler are on commentary. Slater and Rhyno are defending and this is joined in progress with Slater caught in a chinlock. The comeback is cut off and we hit another chinlock to keep the champs in trouble. Slater fights up and dives over for the tag as everything breaks down. The commentators get in the expected argument and it’s Mikey being knocked off the apron onto Miz. A Gore to Kenny retains the titles at 4:03.
Rating: C-. This was fine and a basic tag match with Slater and Rhyno beating yet another team. I don’t think anyone really considers them to be great champions but they could have been a joke and are turning into perfectly acceptable champions. Also, by having them win matches like this one, it’s going to mean more when they lose the belts. It’s putting in effort early for a later payoff, which is a lost art in wrestling.
Hell in a Cell preview.
Ambrose is on the way to the ring when he runs into Ellsworth. Dean: “Didn’t I tell you to stay in the back and sulk?” James begs to be in Dean’s corner and Ambrose eventually relents, much to the audience’s delight.
AJ Styles vs. Dean Ambrose
Non-title with Ellsworth in the corner and a win makes Dean #1 contender. Ambrose starts fast and stomps away in the corner but AJ comes right back with some shots of his own. With a look towards Ellsworth, AJ scores with the slingshot dive to take us to a break. Back with Dean hitting the suicide dive and grabbing a Fujiwara armbar of all things. AJ rolls out but gets caught in a Texas cloverleaf, sending him crawling over to the ropes. Back up and they fight over a suplex off the apron, only to have AJ suplex him out to the floor for a crash.
We come back from another break with Dean fighting up and hitting the top rope standing elbow drop. AJ’s strike rush is countered into a swinging neckbreaker but he scores with the springboard into the reverse DDT. The Styles Clash is countered into a rollup for two and the rebound lariat drops both guys. AJ comes right back with the Calf Crusher but Dean grabs the champ’s head and slams it into the mat for a break.
The hold goes on again but the power of Ellsworth makes Dean crawl to the ropes, just like Randy saved Rip in No Holds Barred. That’s enough for AJ who takes James out with a baseball slide. The Pele looks to set up the Styles Clash but Dean backdrops AJ to the floor. Ellsworth superkicks Styles……and that’s a DQ at 19:57 with Dean nearly losing his mind.
Rating: B. Good match here and the ending makes sense. I’m not sure where this leads and you have to imagine that Ambrose will get a title shot somehow down the road anyway. Above all else, Ambrose can only blame himself as he invited Ellsworth to come out to ringside. It’s also a good way to protect both guys, which you also don’t see enough.
Overall Rating: B-. This felt like another NXT show with Smackdown banners. The wrestling wasn’t great at times but they advanced almost every story and treated them all like big deals. I’m curious to see where Orton and the Wyatts go, as well as finding out what’s next for AJ and Dean. I don’t get those feelings on Raw and that’s a big reason why Smackdown is better.
Results
Bray Wyatt b. Kane – Pin after an RKO from Randy Orton
Hype Bros b. Ascension – Hype Ryder to Viktor
Nikki Bella b. Natalya – STF
Heath Slater/Rhyno b. Spirit Squad – Gore to Kenny
AJ Styles b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when James Ellsworth interfered
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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989: The Wrestlemania Experiment
Survivor Series 1989 Date: November 23, 1989
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 15,294
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
While Warrior is busy fighting the Heenan Family and Andre the Giant in particular, Hulk Hogan is feuding with Ted DiBiase and DiBiase’s hand picked opponent: the monster Zeus. This would be one of the dumbest ideas that wrestling has ever produced for reasons that we’ll get to later. Let’s get to it.
We open with a video shot from a car going up to the arena, going through the doors, at the souvenir stands (12.99 for a shirt. Today that might get you a sleeve) and now it’s time for opening show promos.
Hogan is thankful for time with his family and to be the strongest force in the universe. And for his team.
DiBiase is glad he’s rich.
Jake likes his snake and the DDT.
Demolition is glad they don’t have to fight each other.
Savage is glad he’s the Macho King.
Duggan is proud to be an American.
Bravo is glad Earthquake is on his side.
Dusty is thankful for his polka dots.
Beefcake for cutting hair.
Martel for his looks.
Rude for his body.
Piper because he’s not Ricky Rude.
Genius for being the smartest man in the world.
Perfect for being his name.
The Bushwhackers for sardine stuffing.
Heenan for being surrounded by the Heenan Family.
Warrior should be thankful that Ritalin is soon to be available.
We run down the cards with those nifty squares showing each team member.
Dream Team vs. Enforcers
Dream Team: Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Tito Santana, Red Rooster
Enforcers: Big Boss Man, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man
This is mainly over Dusty vs. Boss Man in Dusty’s first big feud in the company. Dusty stole Boss Man’s nightstick hat which has ticked Boss Man off and rightfully so. The other major feud is Santana vs. Martel, as the two split at Wrestlemania V with Martel turning heel. Tito and Honky start things off and for the third straight year, Honky and Brutus are in the opening match on this show.
Tito takes over quickly but Honky gets in one kick before RUNNING over to make a tag to Martel. That’s quite the cowardly heel act. Rick dropkicks Tito down as Jesse talks about the now broken up Strike Force. Tito atomic drops Martel for two and everyone but Bad News gets in the ring at once. Nothing all that interesting happens but it’s cool to see. Brown not getting in is perfect for his character too. Off to the Boss Man who is immediately armdragged down by Tito.
Dusty comes in and pounds away as the fans go nuts. Chicago was a big NWA town so it’s easy to see why he’s popular. Brutus comes in to another pop but Boss Man takes him down with a few shots to the back. Honky comes in but misses a fist drop. Beefcake hammers away but Martel makes a blind tag and takes over on Brutus. Rooster comes in and the place goes quiet. When you can’t get a reaction in Chicago, things aren’t that good for you.
Martel hits some knees to the face and it’s off to Honky who dances a lot. Boss Man comes in and slugs it out with Rooster with the big man taking over with ease. Martel comes back in and drops some knees but gets rolled up for two. Back to Honky as Rooster is in trouble. The four man variations are already paying dividends as the match seems less crowded from the start and the guys can stay in the ring a little longer. Rooster and Honky collide and it’s a double tag to give us another battle of Strike Force.
Tito goes loco on Martel and beats him down, but Martel breaks the figure four. Santana tries an O’Connor Roll but Martel rolls through and grabs the trunks for the first elimination. Dusty comes in next and hits a dropkick (and a decent one) followed by the big elbow…for two? We must be in the WWF. Brutus comes in to work on the arm and stomp on Martel’s face when he tries a reverse monkey flip.
Rooster comes in and can’t seem to figure out what to do with a headlock. Martel gets impatient and takes him down with a backbreaker. Off to Boss Man who slaps on a bearhug. Gorilla keeps calling Brutus the team captain but the team is called the Dream Team and Dusty came out last. I for one believe Gorilla Monsoon at all costs. Rooster bites out of the hold and Boss Man tags Bad News…..who isn’t interested in coming in.
After Bad News gets pulled in he takes over because he’s fighting a freaking rooster. Just like last year though, Bad News accidentally gets hit by his partner and he walks out. Good to see some things never change. It’s three on three now and we have Boss Man vs. Brutus. After the Barber gets beaten on some more it’s off to Honky for a belly to back suplex. Out of nowhere Brutus hits a high knee to Honky for the fast pin, making it 3-2 (Brutus, Dusty and Rooster vs. Boss Man and Martel).
Martel immediately comes in and puts a chinlock on Brutus which doesn’t last long. The second version of the move does though as the match slows down a lot. A backbreaker puts Brutus down and he goes into the buckle a few times. Brutus grabs a sunset flip again out of nowhere to eliminate Martel and it’s 3-1. Brutus tags in Rooster to throw a bone to Boss Man and the Boss Man Slam gets the fast pin to make it 2-1.
Dusty is in next but it’s quickly off to Brutus for some knees to the chest. Back to Dusty as the good guys are using some intelligence with the fast tags. Boss Man gets whipped into the ropes and Dusty takes him down with a cross body, likely rupturing at least three of Boss Man’s vital organs in the process, for the final pin.
Rating: C+. Nothing special here but it was fine for an opener. The fans liked most of the good guys and other than Rooster, that was a solid set of heroes. The match wasn’t competitive or anything for the most part after the first five minutes but there was nothing particularly bad about it.
Boss Man destroys Dusty with the nightstick and cuffs him to the ropes to keep up the beating. Brutus makes the save with his clippers.
Boss Man brags about what he just did.
The King’s Court, led by King Randy Savage, is ready.
The 4x4s, Jim Duggan’s team, say the same thing but much louder.
4x4s vs. King’s Court
4x4s: Jim Duggan, Ronnie Garvin, Bret Hart, Hercules
King’s Court: Randy Savage, Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Greg Valentine
The 4x4s all jog to the ring with boards in their hands. This would be the second or third time that Bret was teased as a singles guy but it wouldn’t click for another year and a half. The major feud here is Savage vs. Duggan over the crown which Savage recently took from Duggan. Valentine and Garvin also have an issue but it’s nothing major. The board carriers clear the ring and stand in the ring for a while. It looks like we start with Garvin vs. Savage but Duggan chases Savage to the floor before it’s Hercules who actually starts for the 4x4s.
Hercules pounds away and slams Savage down, but right into the King’s corner and it’s off to Valentine. Greg gets atomic dropped and Bret gets tagged in. Bret works on the arm for a bit and it’s off to Duggan for some right hands. Garvin comes in and this feud continues to be lame. Garvin gets taken into the heel corner and it’s off to Bravo for some power.
Hercules comes back in to make it power vs. power with Hercules taking over. And never mind as Earthquake comes in, kills Hercules with a shot to the head and hits the Earthquake (running seated senton splash) for the elimination. Duggan comes in and collides with Earthquake (he’s still Canadian Earthquake here but that didn’t last long) but can’t do anything to him. Bret, being the smart guy that he is, sneaks up on Earthquake and school boys him so Duggan can take him down.
Off to Garvin who pounds away but Earthquake crushes him badly enough to make Garvin a pizza topping. Bravo comes in to pound away on Garvin, followed by Valentine doing the same. The Figure Four is countered and Garvin rolls Greg up for two. Savage drops a knee and it’s back to Bravo to work Garvin over a bit more. A backslide gets two for Ronnie and Savage comes in again very quickly.
Valentine comes back in even faster and they chop it out but Garvin makes a blind tag to Duggan for the three point clothesline to eliminate Valentine and tie things up. Bravo comes in again and is quickly followed by Savage and then Earthquake. Earthquake misses a big elbow and there’s the tag to Garvin. He beats on whomever he can and headbutts Bravo down. Here’s the Garvin Stomp (the circling stomp that Randy Orton uses in modern times) and he tries the Sharpshooter (Garvin used it before Bret) but Dino breaks it up.
NOW we get somewhere with a double tag to Savage vs. Hart. These two had an awesome match on Saturday Night’s Main Event a year or so before this but they never got to follow it up. Bret takes over with an atomic drop and goes for the legs but Savage dives away and tags in Bravo again. The middle rope elbow gets two for Bret and it’s back to Garvin who immediately walks into a side suplex to make it 3-2.
It’s Duggan vs. Earthquake again with Jim pounding away in the corner. Bret gets the tag and a double clothesline puts the big man down. Savage comes in and Bret is ready for a fight. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Duggan chokes away like the hero he is. Randy gets Bret down and misses a knee drop, allowing Hart to hit a backbreaker for two.
A small package gets two for Bret and Savage charges into a boot. Bret misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Bravo again. Dino puts on a bearhug because this match hasn’t dragged enough already. Off to Earthquake for some high powered choking followed by an elbow drop for two. The crowd popped a bit for the kickout which is more than can be said for most of this match.
Bret finally breaks free and tags Hacksaw in again so he can slam Savage. And never mind as Bret tags back in about 15 seconds later. Bravo works over the mostly beaten Bret and Hart misses a charge, going shoulder first into the post. A shoulder breaker sets up the Savage Elbow to make it 3-1.
It’s off to Earthquake to beat on Duggan in the corner but he misses a charge and everyone comes in. Duggan throws everyone into the corner into Earthquake and the Court all bails to the floor. Savage and Bravo get clotheslined down but Earthquake jumps Duggan to take him down. A big elbow gets two on Duggan and it’s back to Bravo. Duggan avoids a charging Savage but Sherri low bridges him and it eventually draws a countout.
Rating: D+. For the life of me I don’t get why Duggan didn’t get pinned here. The ending is rather lame and it doesn’t help a match that ran WAY too long anyway. You could easily cut ten minutes out of this and no one would have missed anything at all. The match was dull outside of the moments when Bret was in there, which is something we’ll touch on more later.
Duggan chases them off with the board.
The Million Dollar Team is ready for a Thanksgiving feast in the form of the Hulkamaniacs.
Dusty Rhodes is hurt badly.
The Genius reads a poem about Thanksgiving.
Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team
Hulkamaniacs: Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts
Million Dollar Team: Ted DiBiase, Zeus, Powers of Pain
Ok, so now I get to explain Zeus. Back in 1989, the WWF released a movie called No Holds Barred starring Hulk Hogan. The villain in the movie is named Zeus and you may notice he’s here. Zeus is played by an actor (not a wrestler mind you) named Tom Lister and the idea is that he’s living his character and is coming to beat Hogan up “in real life” because he lost in the movie. This would be like the guy who played Goldfinger trying to get revenge on Sean Connery. To make things even better, this was rumored to be the main event of Wrestlemania VI.
I’m sure you can see the problems mounting up already, with the main one being that Zeus doesn’t know how to wrestle. Other than that, there’s the fact that the movie barely broke even so a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story. A positive twist to this is that a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story, which probably kept the company from being laughed at more than they already were. Zeus wrestled like four matches ever, most of which were short or tag matches so he wasn’t in the ring long. WCW, the geniuses that they are, brought him back seven years later and put him in the main event of another PPV.
Anyway back to the match. The Million Dollar Team won’t let them get inside until Jake fires in the snake to chase them all away. Hogan and Demolition are the champions that you would expect them to be at this point. Zeus wants to fight Hogan one on one but their respective partners hold them both back. Jake starts with Zeus but the actor wants Hogan. They stare each other down and Hogan bounces off Zeus. Hogan pounds away but nothing hurts Zeus at all.
Instead Hulk finds the one weak spot on Zeus by raking the eyes. He slams Zeus down and amazingly enough, IT DOESN’T REALLY DO MUCH. Barbarian hits Hogan in the back of the head and Zeus twists Hogan’s neck around. He starts choking away and it’s a DQ for Zeus who is only pulled off by DiBiase and the promise of money. Just to clarify, we’re giving the Hulkamaniacs, an 80s dream team, a man advantage. Also why would DiBiase get Zeus off Hogan? Wouldn’t Hogan’s pain and agony make DiBiase happy?
It’s DiBiase vs. Hogan now and Hulk is in early trouble. DiBiase hammers away in the corner but Hulk gets a boot up to stop a charge and there’s the tag to Jake. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and it’s off to Ax who demolishes DiBiase with ease. Smash comes in and they both pound Ted down. Back to Hogan who helps Demolition with a triple team. Our hero everyone. Back to Ax with a clothesline but DiBiase elbows him down out of desperation.
Off to Warlord as these two teams are still feuding even a year later. Come to think of it there wasn’t much else in between for those guys either. The tag team division really has fallen far in just a year. A shoulder breaker puts Ax down but Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow. Back to Warlord but he gets clotheslined down almost immediately. Fuji trips Ax up and a basic elbow drop is enough to tie the score.
It’s Smash vs. Warlord now but it’s quickly off to Hogan. Hulk softens him up to bring in Jake, which Jesse calls a mismatch. That’s likely based on power but Jake is taller than Warlord. Off to Smash but Warlord pokes him in the eye to take over. Back to Barbarian whose big boot is caught but Smash misses the elbow. DiBiase comes back in to drop his falling punch for two.
It’s chinlock time with a knee in Smash’s back. DiBiase misses a middle rope back elbow of all things but Smash won’t tag for some reason. Barbarian makes a blind tag so the hot shot Smash hits on DiBiase doesn’t count and Barbarian takes his head off with a top rope clothesline for the pin. Jake comes in next but he can’t DDT Barbarian. Barbarian whips Jake into the corner with authority although I’m not sure who’s authority it was.
Back to Warlord as things slow down a lot due to exhaustion. Jake dives for a tag but DiBiase slaps Hogan to draw him in instead. DiBiase piledrives Jake but Roberts gets a foot on the ropes to Jesse’s annoyance. Barbarian misses a headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Barbarian. He cleans house and gets two on Barbarian off a big boot. A suplex gets the same and my goodness how rare is it to see Hogan get a two count? Hogan fights off both Powers of Pain but they catch him in a spike piledriver which is good for a DQ for both of them, making it Hogan/Roberts vs. DiBiase.
DiBiase drops knees on Hogan before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. That eventually gets two arm drops and Jake makes the save. That’s actually a nice touch as it makes the hold look stronger by needing a save instead of Hogan saving himself. Hogan finally breaks the hold and punches a jumping DiBiase. Hot tag brings in the Snake for some house cleaning. Jake drives in knees on DiBiase’s head as Hogan is dying in the corner.
Here’s Virgil to interfere and take the DDT. DiBiase drops a fist on Jake and puts his feet on the ropes to steal the pin. Ted pounds on Hogan who is still reeling from the long Million Dollar Dream. Off to a chinlock and Hogan taps, which wouldn’t mean a thing for years. Hogan breaks the hold but they clothesline each other. DiBiase belly to back suplexes him and it’s Hulk Up time. You know the rest and there’s the legdrop.
Rating: C. There’s one major problem with this match: the first four minutes of this match give away the ending almost immediately. How can you give Hogan, Roberts and Demolition a man advantage that fast? I’m not saying Hogan should have lost, but the Zeus stuff could have come later in the match and worked much better. Have Zeus stand on the apron most of the match and it would have worked fine. The fans finally reacted at the end though.
Savage and Zeus are ready for their tag team cage match on PPV two days after Christmas.
Hogan and Brutus do the same. They’re facing Savage and Zeus in case that wasn’t clear. Sherri shows up and throws powder in their faces so that Savage and Zeus can jump them.
Jesse and Gorilla talk about the tag match and Jesse mentions that there’s trouble in the Heenan Family, which is code for Arn Anderson about to go back to the NWA and Tully getting busted for cocaine.
The Rude Brood is ready for Roddy’s Rowdies. These promos are pretty much the same all around.
This one however isn’t. Roddy is talking to Gene when the Bushwhackers and Snuka come up and are all holding turkey legs. Roddy says after the match they can have lunch. Then they all scream about breaking big bones.
Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies
Rude Brood: Rick Rude, Fabulous Rougeau Brothers, Mr. Perfect
Roddy’s Rowdies: Roddy Piper, Bushwhackers, Jimmy Snuka
There’s no Heenan with Rude, which is part of the issues the Family is having. Luke (of the Bushwhackers along with partner Butch) and Perfect get things going but after a single slam it’s off to Butch who bites on Perfect’s thigh. Luke comes in and does the same and Snuka matches suit. Butch bites as well and it’s off to Snuka.
Jacques comes in as well and they stall a lot. Jacques poses so Snuka headbutts him down and follows up with a big chop. A slam puts Jacques down and it’s a Superfly Splash for a quick elimination. Rude comes in next and swivels his hips, only to get headbutted into a tag from Perfect. Rude accidentally low bridges Perfect so Snuka rams them together and the Brood is in trouble.
Off to Piper vs. Perfect and the Brood’s luck continues to go bad. Luke comes in and drops a knee before it’s off to Snuka for more shots to the head. Back to Luke for more biting and Butch beats on him a bit more. Piper comes in to face Raymond and for some reason Rougeau tries to slug it out with Piper. A superkick puts Piper down for two but he piledrives Raymond for the easy pin and it’s 4-2.
Perfect comes in with his neck snap for two and for the first time, Piper’s team is in trouble. Piper comes back with a slingshot to send Perfect into the post. Butch comes in for some basic stuff but it’s quickly back to Luke. Roddy is already back in for some rapid fire punches and now it’s Perfect in trouble. Back to Butch for more biting but he poses too long and Perfect rolls him up for the elimination.
Piper tries to steal a pin on a rollup to Perfect but it only gets two. Off to Snuka before Luke headbutts Perfect in the stomach. Rude makes a blind tag but jumps into a punch to the gut. Luke ducks his head and the Rude Awakening ties us up at two each. It’s Piper/Snuka vs. Rude/Perfect which is a heck of a midcard tag match.
Rude vs. Snuka starts the final four off and Rude swivels a bit more. Perfect comes in and taunts Piper, drawing him in so Snuka can get double teamed. Snuka finally gets in a shot to break Perfect’s momentum but Rude gets the tag before Piper can come in. Snuka grabs a quick small package for two before taking Perfect down with a flying headbutt. They hit head to head and both guys go down, followed by a double tag.
We finally get Piper vs. Rude which is the whole point of the match. Piper easily wins a slugout and backdrops Rude down. They fight to the floor and it’s a double countout, getting us down to Snuka vs. Perfect. Perfect hits a great looking dropkick to put Snuka on the floor. Back in and Snuka gets in a chop in the corner, followed by a cross body for two. The PerfectPlex out of nowhere gives Perfect the win.
Rating: C-. They did the right thing by having the tag teams get knocked out quickly because they didn’t mean anything in this at all. Other than that though there was nothing of note here. Piper and Rude were both counted out to make sure they stayed strong and Snuka didn’t mean anything at this point. Nothing to see here but it wasn’t bad or anything.
The Rude Brood celebrates and Rude says don’t worry about Heenan being gone.
The Ultimate Warriors are very fired up. Warrior’s topic of the night: organ donor cards.
Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family
Ultimate Warriors: Ultimate Warrior, Jim Neidhart, Rockers
Heenan Family: Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan
Andre can barely move and it’s sad to see. Neidhart and the Rockers start before anything happens and Jim is in trouble early. Here’s Warrior, the reigning Intercontinental Champion, without any music and a big clothesline puts Andre on the floor, which draws a countout because Andre was the only Heenan Family member in the ring when the bell rang. We’ve already got the same problem the Hogan match had.
Warrior and Haku get things started for all intents and purposes but it’s quickly off to Neidhart vs. Arn. Andre (in blue instead of black) yells incoherently at the Warrior as he leaves. It’s Haku vs. Jim now with Haku in control. A superkick puts Neidhart down and eliminates him like it’s a squash match. Off to Shawn to make Haku miss him and now it’s Jannetty’s turn.
Haku tries a double clothesline but only hits Shawn. He picks up Marty but Shawn dropkicks Marty down onto Haku for a near fall. Off to Arn who tries a double suplex with Haku on Jannetty, but Shawn catches his partner in a nice move. Double superkicks put the wrestlers on the other team down and it’s off to Marty vs. Haku. Warrior gets a tag in a few seconds later and Haku immediately goes for the eyes.
Haku backs Warrior into the corner and Heenan points to Arn for the tag in a funny bit. Arn immediately gets taken down and Marty hooks an armbar. Anderson brings Marty to the corner and tags in Heenan for a single punch before it’s back to Haku. Arn knees Marty in the back and Haku superkicks him down so Heenan can drop a knee on Jannetty for the pin. You could loudly hear them calling spots on that sequence for some reason.
Warrior comes in so here’s Anderson again and he’s quickly caught in a bearhug. Haku comes in and gets one as well. Off to Shawn who gets knocked to the floor with a few shots. Shawn moonsaults out of the corner over Arn and Anderson is in trouble. Warrior and Michaels both punch Anderson at the same time and Arn backs away from Warrior. A splash from Shawn gets two and it’s back to Haku.
That doesn’t last long either as a cross body eliminates Haku to get us down to Warrior/Shawn vs. Heenan/Anderson. Heenan tries to get in some cheap shots on Shawn which draws in Warrior. Why? Was he that afraid for Shawn’s safety? Arn dumps Shawn to the floor and Heenan goes up….and then regains his sanity and climbs back down. Arn keeps asking for help from Heenan because he’s getting tired so it’s finally back to Bobby, who runs at the first sign of trouble.
Shawn rams his head into the back of Arn’s head and both guys are down. They slug it out but Shawn walks into the spinebuster (called the Anderson Drop) for the elimination. Warrior fires off some shoulders but Arn ducks and sends him to the floor. Heenan goes up again but thinks better of it again.
Off to Heenan but Warrior quickly Hulks up so we see some more Anderson. Warrior fights him off as well and whips Arn into Heenan to knock Bobby to the floor. The gorilla press and splash get us down to one on one. Warrior sneaks up on Heenan and what do you think happens here? A shoulder block and splash take care of Bobby in short order.
Rating: C-. I think it was watching the whole show before this but this was another dull match. Warrior was never in any danger and I think everyone knew it. To be fair, this would have been better with Tully out there and you can’t fault the guys for that. Heenan being in there had to turn it into a comedy match and I can’t hold that against them. Still though, another dull match in a series of them tonight.
Warrior sprints up the aisle and clotheslines Heenan as he leaves to end the show.
Overall Rating: D. There are multiple problems associated with this show. First of all, nothing here is what you would call good. The matches are all ok at best and nothing beyond that. I guess the best match would be the opener, but even that was just ok. This was a really weak time in the company as they had Hogan but he had beaten everyone already so there’s nothing for him to do.
However there’s a bigger problem with Survivor Series overall. In short, what’s the point of any of this stuff? No stories are advanced here, other than the first match there was no clean fall between the people the feuding people, and there’s nothing to build off here. Look at Hogan. If you have Hogan lose in that match with DiBiase putting him to sleep after that much of a beating, you have a new opponent for him.
Instead, we have Hogan standing tall again which is nothing new at all. That’s the problem with the first few shows other than the first one. Survivor Series went nowhere and the appeal died very quickly. That wouldn’t change until 1991 so 1990 was somehow even more boring to sit through.
Ratings Comparison:
Dream Team vs. Enforcers
Original: B-
Redo: C+
King’s Court vs. 4x4s
Original: B+
Redo: D+
Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team
Original: D-
Redo: C
Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies
Original: D
Redo: C-
Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family
Original: C+
Redo: C-
Overall Rating
Original: D+
Redo: D
Bonus Match
Original: B-
Redo: B
I think the difference here is that with the original I didn’t like it at all but with the new one I got bored by it because it just keeps going and going.
Lucha Underground – October 19, 2016: It’s A Big Deal Again
Lucha Underground Date: October 19, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker
Things haven’t been great around here but this week will see Prince Puma facing Mil Muertes. If that’s not going to help things out around here, there’s nothing that’s going to. Other than that we’re likely seeing more in the never ending Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio feud. Let’s get to it.
The opening recap looks at Prince Puma’s rebirth, Killshot being stalked, the Worldwide Underground vs. Sexy Star and Dario’s Dial of Doom.
Vampiro goes up to Puma for some advice but the Prince wants nothing to do with him.
We open with Dario’s Dial of Doom for the Lucha Underground Title shot.
Lucha Underground Title: Matanza vs. Killshot
Killshot is challenging but has a bad back coming in. Matanza is smart enough to go after the ribs and throw Killshot down onto the back. Some backbreakers have Killshot in even more trouble and Matanza shrugs off anything Killshot throws at him. Killshot goes up and has to escape a super tombstone of all things. Instead it’s a superkick to crotch Matanza into an elevated DDT. The double stomp misses though and Wrath of the Gods retains the title at 4:08.
Rating: C. I kind of like the idea of Killshot winning one of these in a glorified squash. Matanza doesn’t always have to be vulnerable and Killshot’s back injury prevents this from killing Killshot’s credibility. He’s already got a story going and isn’t a main event name so let the big name beat him decisively while he can move on.
Post match a guy with more dog tags (Former Evolve Champion AR Fox.) comes in to see Killshot. After an awkward hug, the unnamed man kicks Killshot in the face and gives him a fisherman’s buster. With Killshot down, the guy throws the dog tags on him and says Killshot left him for dead. I’m digging this story and the matches should be awesome.
The Rabbit Tribe is still coming.
Drago vs. Fenix vs. Aerostar
This is for one of Dario’s unique opportunities and that could mean anything. If nothing else it should mean a sweet match. Speaking of sweet, Dario announces AZTEC WARFARE returning in four weeks. Matanza will be entering at #1 and the winner of this match will be entering at #20, though the losers are OUT. That certainly is a unique opportunity.
Fenix is on the apron to start as they’re actually having tags. Feeling out process to start until Aerostar is sent outside, meaning Fenix can legally come in. The tags are quickly forgotten (as they should be) and things speed way up in a hurry. Fenix gets slammed face first into the mat to bust him open, leaving Aerostar to kick Drago in the corner. That’s fine with Fenix who superkicks the heck out of Aerostar, setting off the streak of dives to the floor.
Back in and Aerostar gets two off a DDT with Drago making the save. Drago puts Aerostar on the apron and Fenix on the top, only to have the latter take him out with a high crossbody. Fenix grabs his standing Indian deathlock on Drago but gets caught in a Black Widow at the same time. I know they look cool but I’m not a fan of spots where they’re clearly working together. Fenix is sent outside and Drago grabs a running Blockbuster for the pin on Aerostar at 8:47.
Rating: B-. This is the kind of lucha match that the show has been lacking. Just have three people (who happen to be the Trios Champions) go out there and fly around for a bit so the crowd can have fun. It’s an idea that worked really well before and it’s working well now. Fenix and Aerostar being out of Aztec Warfare is interesting, even though Fenix would have been a dark horse contender.
Drago is in the back when Kobra Moon crawls up to him. She wants him to bring the title back to their tribe but he says he left years ago. Vinnie Massaro of all people comes up eating pizza and saying this is the men’s locker room.
Johnny Mundo comes in to Dario’s office and STILL demands to be Lucha Underground Champion. Mundo gives Dario most of $100,000 for a shot at the Gift of the Gods Title.
Mil Muertes vs. Prince Puma
Puma strikes away to start but the headscissors is broken up with a knee to the ribs. A springboard clothesline only gets Puma so far but he avoids a charge and hits two straight dives. That’s fine with Muertes who spears Puma in half and hits him with a wooden chair. For some reason Muertes stops to look at the stone though and Puma hits a huge dive off the balcony to take him down again. What a sweet looking spot. There’s nothing else that needs to be said there: he went up really high, dove off, and looked cool. Sometimes that’s all you need.
Back in and Mil snaps off a powerslam before forearming Puma out of a spinning kick. A painful looking swinging chokeslam gets two on Puma but a superkick sets up the 630 for the completely clean pin on Muertes at 8:50. I know Muertes has taken a backseat to Matanza in the last year or so but that’s still a big win.
Rating: B+. This is the kind of match I love seeing on Lucha Underground. It’s an old feud and they beat the heck out of each other with a bunch of big spots. Puma is someone who could be rocketed right back to the top of the card and this is the kind of win that could do that for him. The same is true of Muertes, who will get to rebound from this kind of a loss.
Rey Mysterio is talking to Chavo Guerrero Sr. about his respect for Chavo Jr. Sr. respects Rey as well.
Overall Rating: B. Now that’s more like it. This was an action packed show but more importantly they now have something to look forward with Aztec Warfare. That match is the kind of thing that feels unique to Lucha Underground, which is something they’ve been missing for a long time now. Then again, maybe it was the lack of Chavo as that’s always a good thing.
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Monday Night Raw – October 24, 2016: Who Needs Sunday and a Cell?
Monday Night Raw Date: October 24, 2016
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves
The Beast is back tonight as Brock Lesnar is here for his first comments about his upcoming match with Goldberg. In addition to that we have two big matches including Sheamus and Cesaro vs. New Day in a non-title match and Chris Jericho vs. Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens in a triple threat. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Jericho to open things up with some terrible news: tonight’s triple threat match has been canceled until further notice. The fans aren’t happy with that one but Jericho says it’s because SOMEONE HAS STOLEN THE LIST OF JERICHO. Fans: “NO! NO! NO!” Jericho isn’t leaving until the List is returned but here’s Owens to interrupt. Owens doesn’t care who has the List but he’ll help Jericho find it once they get rid of Rollins.
Jericho says there’s no triple threat match tonight but here’s Stephanie McMahon to interrupt. She explains the idea of the triple threat (because Stephanie thinks all fans are idiots) and here’s Rollins with the List. Jericho freaks out and Stephanie goes all screechy to say give it back.
Seth sees Stephanie mentioned as a stupid idiot but at the very bottom is Jericho’s former best friend, Kevin Owens. Rollins wants to start a new list about Owens, who has no idea how it is inside the Cell. He’ll also kick Owens’ teeth down his throat and break his face with a Pedigree so he can teach HHH and Stephanie a lesson (because that’s what really matters in this whole thing).
This segment showed how horribly uninteresting this whole thing is when Jericho isn’t talking. Owens barely got to say anything and Rollins wants to win the title to show up HHH and Stephanie. Some main event feud. Also, did Stephanie need to be here? Like at all? She came out, told Jericho to do the main event (which Owens had already done) and was insulted that she was on the list (like Owens a few seconds later).
Post break Stephanie tells Rollins to give the List back because the fans were promised a triple threat. Rollins vents about Stephanie’s real intentions and says the List is in the locker room.
Enzo Amore vs. Karl Anderson
Anderson and Gallows have cut off Enzo’s mic so he and the crowd do it with pure vocal power. Enzo fires off rights and lefts in the corner but dives into a spinebuster as we take an early break. Back with Enzo getting kicked in the face but stopping a charge in the corner. A rollup is broken up but Cass kicks Karl in the face to give Enzo the pin at 7:39.
Rating: D+. I almost had this whole match written from the opening bell because this was exactly what you would have expected these two to do. It’s fine to set up the tag match and thank goodness we didn’t hear any of Anderson and Gallows trying to be funny. Enzo and Cass need to win on Sunday as it’s not like Anderson and Gallows can go much further into the hole.
Rusev says he slept like a baby last night because he gets his hands on Roman Reigns inside the Cell this Sunday. Reigns has done a lot of horrible things but now it’s Rusev’s chance to crush him for good. Simple and to the point here, as it should be.
New Day vs. Cesaro/Sheamus
Non-title. Before the match, New Day praises Cesaro but says Sheamus shames us because no one wants to see him. Woods is the odd man out here, which is kind of surprising as they’re normally defending the titles. Cesaro’s backbreaker gets two on Kofi and a double back elbows shows that Cesaro and Sheamus can actually work together. New Day quickly gets it together and takes Sheamus into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede.
Back from a break with Kofi in trouble and taking the ten forearms to the chest. Cesaro misses a charge into the post and the hot tag brings in Big E. to deal with Sheamus. The Irish Curse gets two on Big E. and Cesaro’s vertical suplex gets the same. The Midnight Hour is broken up but Kofi is launched straight into the uppercut. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Big E. for the pin at 11:45.
Rating: C+. Let’s see. Yeah I’m checking here. Maybe….almost….nah I still don’t care about Sheamus and Cesaro. They’re still the same uninteresting pair that have been around since before Summerslam and still are little more than a rehash of the League of Nations having problems against New Day back in the spring. New Day needs to roll over them and give us the record in December. If you just have to give these two the belts after that then so be it but don’t mess with the year plus run for this stupid idea.
We look back at Goldberg’s return.
Jericho frantically looks for the List but runs into Titus O’Neil, the Shining Stars and Jinder Mahal, all of whom have something for him other than the List (Titus Brand, travel brochures and a breathing exercise).
Bayley vs. Dana Brooke
Bayley has a taped up shoulder after last week. Dana says not so fast because she doesn’t like the idea of last week’s win being called an upset. Tonight there’s going to be another match but this time it’s arm wrestling. Dana easily wins so Bayley offers to go left handed. Bayley starts to win and of course Dana decks her and turns the table over for the beatdown. A Bayley to Belly sends Dana running and thankfully cuts off the BORING chants. Can you blame the fans for not being impressed here?
Jericho is freaking out over the List when he runs into Stephanie, who isn’t interested in helping him. Stephanie lists off everything she has going on and says Jericho is in the match, List or not. Chris says no List and no match, ya dig? That’s not cool with the boss, who says Jericho wrestles or gets suspended.
Curtis Axel vs. Bo Dallas
Before the match, Axel does a really good speech about his Minnesota roots and being Curt Hennig’s son. Bo starts fast but the Roll of the Dice is countered into a PerfectPlex for two. I bought that for a second. A running forearm drops Curtis and we hit the chinlock. Axel fights out and hits the running neck snap for two and that’s it for his offense as Dallas grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:58. I’ve said Axel should be pushed as a face for years and this was more evidence that I’m right. It’s also more evidence that WWE gets way too much pleasure out of having people lose in their hometown.
Video on Rich Swann.
Jericho is about to leave when a guy comes up to say he saw the List. Chris finds…..Braun Strowman looking at it and asks for it back. Braun: “Say please.” Strowman doesn’t see Sami Zayn’s name on the List but gives it back anyway. Jericho says it’s on page four and since Braun touched his personal property, HE JUST MADE THE LIST!
Roman Reigns talks about being in the Cell, which Rusev hasn’t experienced. Reigns takes this personally and is ready to do anything to keep the title on Sunday.
We run down the card for Sunday’s show.
Golden Truth vs. Shining Stars
Mark Henry is with Golden Truth and Titus is with the Stars, which makes me feel a bit better about their earlier segment. It’s really nice to have them actually have a reason to be in the back instead of just showing up for a cameo. I love little things like that. Corey is reading a brochure as the Stars come out to the ring as he needs to get his mom a birthday gift.
Primo is dropped by Goldust to start but some double teaming puts him down. The snap powerslam puts Epico down and everything breaks down with Titus low bridging Truth to the floor. Henry shoves Titus into the ropes to crotch Epico, setting up a flapjack into Little Jimmy for the pin at 4:02.
Rating: D. Can someone take this show behind the barn and shoot it already? I’ll actually give this match a little credit: they’re trying to build something out of nothing and it could be a lot worse. I mean, there’s at least something there and a moderate attempt to be interesting. It’s not really working and the match feels like a nacho break but I’ll take what I can get.
Mick Foley is in the ring for the contract signing between Sasha Banks and Charlotte. They talk about how big of a moment this is going to be, only to have Foley go into his annual rant about how evil the Cell is. Charlotte calls Sasha an entitled second rate talent who will learn respect from the Queen this Sunday. Sasha is ready to crawl up the ramp broken and bloodied as long as she has the Women’s Title. They trade insults but Foley cuts them both off to say he’s their future. Dude if the Cell is going to turn them into 6’4 men with long beards, maybe we should cancel the match.
As expected, the fans chant for Foley, thereby completely missing the point of this segment. Foley met Charlotte as a child and his kids gave Sasha their signed photo of Eddie Guerrero. More insults and a double signing FINALLY wrap this up. Charlotte vs. Sasha in a major gimmick match is fine but no one, like NO ONE, buys that the match is going to be all violent and career threatening like Foley is pushing and that kills the idea.
Emmalina video.
Brian Kendrick vs. Rich Swann
TJ Perkins is on commentary. As Kendrick makes his entrance, we see clips of his run from seven to ten years ago. It’s very sad that the #1 contender to a title doesn’t even have enough video from his current run for a highlight reel. In case you didn’t know, Perkins runs down his history with Kendrick (Brian was his mentor) for the millionth or so time.
Swann flips over Brian and hits a good looking dropkick. A spinning dive to the floor takes Kendrick down and we head to a break. Back with Swann fighting out of a chinlock and snapping off a top rope hurricanrana. What looks like a victory roll is broken up but Swann slips out of the Captain’s Hook and grabs a cradle for the pin at 9:14.
Rating: C. So Swann, who looked a lot better here, pins the #1 contender for a title that has no heat going into a pay per view title match. I get that Swann is likely the next challenger but they’re ruining this division more week by week. I’ll spare you another list of problems and just say Swann looked good here and go on.
Owens promises violence on Sunday but he’s the only one coming back.
Braun Strowman vs. Sami Zayn
This has the potential to be good so let’s see how they can screw it up. Before the bell, Strowman says he wants competition but he doesn’t see that in front of him. Strowman shoves him away but Sami low bridges him to the floor. This goes badly for Sami as he dives at Braun, only to get thrown into the barricade. Strowman walks away and there’s no match.
Kendrick comes in to see Perkins and says the clock is ticking on his career. If TJ loses on Sunday, he’ll bounce back. If Brian loses, that’s it for feeding his family. TJ walks away.
Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman with something to say. Heyman does his usual schtick about how Lesnar will smash Goldberg, only to have the Goldberg chants cut him off. Heyman calls out the fan that started them and says they’re getting on Brock’s nerves. After their match, all of the chants in the world won’t be able to put Goldberg back together again. Suplexes are promised and the fans go back and forth with SUPLEX CITY/GOLDBERG chants. Heyman rips on them and the chant turns into GOLDBERG SUCKS…..to wrap this up. Ok then. There was NOTHING here and it didn’t need Brock at all.
Owens and Jericho have a meeting before the triple threat with Chris asking if their friendship means as much as the title. Kevin smiles it off and doesn’t really answer. Jericho says they’ll still be best friends no matter what but Kevin looks concerned.
Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens
Non-title. They play keep away to start until Owens gets kicked out to the floor. A Blockbuster gets two on Jericho but Owens pulls Seth outside. The champ is sent into the barricade but Jericho throws Seth into the crowd. Back in and Owens scores with a clothesline, only to have Rollins avoid the Cannonball. The Pedigree doesn’t work on either Canadian but the Lionsault hits Seth’s knees.
Owens saves his buddy from a Pedigree and it’s time for the double teaming. The handicap portion continues until Owens is low bridged to the floor. Jericho eats the low superkick and Rollins dives onto Kevin. Seth misses the frog splash and eats a Codebreaker for two. Owens comes back in and slaps Rollins a lot as the STUPID IDIOT chants kick in. Rollins escapes a double superplex and pins both guys at the same time with a double rollup at 10:00.
Rating: C+. The match was fun but it’s WAY too late in the night to really matter. Rollins pinning the champ is appropriate as Owens has been a huge afterthought in this entire story. That also makes four straight times that Rollins has pinned Jericho so you certainly can’t say he’s getting too many wins.
Post match Owens and Jericho destroy Rollins by sending him hard into the steps. We’re still not done though as Rollins runs up the ramp and dives at Owens, only to get beaten down again. Owens gives him the Apron Bomb and walks back up the ramp to get his title so some posing can end the show.
Overall Rating: D-. What a dog of a show this was. There was no effort here and their best idea was to say “Raw Exclusive Pay Per View” over and over as many times as they could. This was every lame idea they could come up with in three hours with almost no one really trying and the show feeling even longer than usual. The worst part is the show wasn’t even the worst. What it was was lacking energy and that’s as bad as it’s going to get. Horrible stuff here and little more than making me want to get to Survivor Series instead of caring about Sunday.
Results
Enzo Amore b. Karl Anderson – Rollup
Cesaro and Sheamus b. New Day – Brogue Kick to Big E.
Bo Dallas b. Curtis Axel – Rollup
Golden Truth b. Shining Stars – Flapjack into Little Jimmy to Epico
Rich Swann b. Brian Kendrick – Oklahoma Roll
Seth Rollins b. Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho – Double rollup
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