Smackdown
Date: February 25, 2016
Location: Bankers Life Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

We’re getting close to Wrestlemania in a hurry and things are really starting to change. This past Monday saw the return of Shane McMahon and the announcement of his match against Undertaker of all people inside the Cell at the biggest show of the year. Other than that we have what seems like the face HHH vs. the heel Roman Reigns for the World Title coming up. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main event of Fastlane and the post match staredown with Reigns vs. HHH.

Here’s HHH for a rare Smackdown appearance to open things up. He gets things going by quoting some Rolling Stones with a little Sympathy for the Devil. HHH talks about how Monday left no doubt in Roman Reigns’ mind about what’s coming for him at Wrestlemania and we see a long clip of the attack on Reigns to end the show.

We see a picture of Reigns after his surgery, which HHH says is a man who has been humbled. You see HHH in a suit right now but make no mistake about it: he is the authority. Everyone wants to rebel and HHH has even been there himself but there’s no point to it. Instead you bow your head and you go to work to do your job. Either accept the authority or let your soul go to waste.

HHH has had to walk over a lot of people to get where he is. Reigns has the sweat part down and HHH knows Roman is good. He saw the blood on Monday, which just leaves the tears. HHH will save those for Wrestlemania when he humbles Roman once and for all because he’s the Game and that’s what he does as the Game, the Cerebral Assassin and the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. This didn’t fix everything but it’s the best promo these guys have done for their match so far.

League of Nations vs. Lucha Dragons/Neville/Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler and Barrett get things going with the King making his first actual in ring appearance in weeks. Everything breaks down less than a minute in with the Dragons diving on Del Rio and Rusev. Alberto kicks them both down as Ziggler DDT’s Barrett, only to get taken down by Sheamus and Rusev as we take a break.

Back with Del Rio giving Ziggler a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Rusev mocks Ziggler’s attempts to tag his partners before bringing Sheamus back in for a suplex. Ziggler comes back with a superkick (of course) and Lawler is suddenly a League fan. The hot tag brings in Neville to clean house with a running clothesline and a basement dropkick to Barrett before heading up top. Sheamus tries to make a save so Neville dives over him with a 450 for a near fall. The Dragons take out Rusev as Neville hits a Red Arrow on Barrett. Del Rio makes the save but eats a superkick, followed by the Brogue Kick to put Neville away at 8:22.

Rating: C+. I liked this because they didn’t bother stretching the match out for the sake of stretching it out. That’s something you see so often on Raw and it makes matches feel longer and longer every single week. This was just as long as it needed to be and didn’t feel like it was missing anything they would have done in a match five minutes longer. Good little match here and it’s nice to see Barrett back in the ring.

Kevin Owens talks about seeing Dean Ambrose take a beating on Monday and then come back to face Brock Lesnar again. It inspired him so much that Ambrose deserves an Intercontinental Title shot. However, Ambrose isn’t here tonight so that’s just too bad. There’s no one left for Owens to beat so he has the night off, which brings in Big Show. Owens makes some retirement jokes until Show grabs him by the shirt and threatens to KO KO.

D-Von Dudley vs. Jimmy Uso

Before the match, Bubba goes on his same rant about not being a nostalgia act because they’re the nine time WWE Tag Team Champions. D-Von promises that they’ll be doing whatever they have to do to prove that they’re the greatest tag team of all time whether you like it or not. Jimmy starts fast with a series of kicks before going up top. Bubba distracts the referee with a table though, allowing him to shove Jimmy off the top. D-Von gets a rollup for the pin at 53 seconds in a storyline segment.

Long recap of Shane McMahon returning on Monday.

Undertaker will be on Raw to address everything.

Chris Jericho talks to AJ Styles about being being partners and potentially Tag Team Champions. They need a third man for a six man tag against New Day later, so here’s Mark Henry to say he’d love to teach those three clowns a lesson.

Godfather Hall of Fame announcement.

Video of Ryback walking out on his partners on Monday, saying it was time for things to be about him.

Big Show vs. Kevin Owens

Non-title. Owens goes right after him to start and is promptly knocked into the corner. A shot to the throat puts Show down and the backsplash gets two. The near fall ticks Show off and he chops away in the corner, sending Owens out to the floor for a breather. Back in and a chokeslam sends Kevin right back to the floor. For some reason Show goes up, only to get crotched out to the floor for a countout at 3:05.

Rating: C. I liked this far better than I was expecting as they actually packed some good intensity into a short match. Show can work quite well in a role like this instead of being in main events over and over. It’s also nice to see Owens winning again instead of losing matches to schnooks like Dolph Ziggler.

Natalya vs. Becky Lynch

They shake hands to start and Natalya takes her down with a headlock. Becky fights up with a dropkick but she misses the spinning legdrop. A suplex sends Becky outside but here are Naomi and Tamina to lay Natalya out for the DQ at 1:58.

Sasha Banks runs out for the save and the villains are cleared out. Cue Charlotte to laugh about Becky vs. Sasha for the #1 contendership taking place on Monday. She’ll be in the front row and wishes both of them the best of luck.

R-Truth vs. Heath Slater

Before the match, Goldust comes out to stand in a neutral corner despite the GOLDEN TRUTH chants. They start with some basic stuff until Truth puts the brakes on and thrusts his hips. Some forearms give Truth the first advantage but Slater comes back with a running knee. Truth gets pulled to the mat by the hair, only to catch Slater with a jumping side kick to the head. Dallas offers a quick distraction but Goldust punches Slater into a backslide to give Truth the pin at 3:10.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here but I’m still hoping they don’t go with Golden Truth. There’s a better story with Truth rejecting him and Goldust not reacting well instead of “yeah sure let’s just be a team.” The segments have been fun but the story doesn’t do much for me if it’s the same thing Goldust did back in 2002.

Post match Truth still doesn’t want help but is a bit nicer about it.

Video on Brock and Ambrose from Raw.

New Day vs. Mark Henry/AJ Styles/Chris Jericho

Before the match, New Day rips on the League of Nations a bit more but then switches over to Y2AJ. As for tonight though, Kofi is stunned that Mark Henry still thinks he’s the World’s Strongest Man. They jump back to insulting Jericho and Styles, who will never be the WWE Tag Team Champions (dance time) because NEW DAY ROCKS.

Big E. shoulders Jericho down to start but it’s quickly off to Henry for a staredown. Some headbutts stagger Big E. and a shoulder puts him down. Henry clotheslines Woods and Kingston out to the floor and his partners add dives. The heroes dance (nice to see AJ getting to show some personality) and we take a break.

Back with Jericho chopping Woods to draw some screams. AJ hits a backbreaker and brings Jericho in again for the springboard dropkick. The distraction lets Big E. take over though as he drops Jericho face first onto the buckle for two. The Unicorn Stampede sets up some tromboning and we get a dance from Big E. Saxton: “When Big E. dances it looks like a penguin in a hula hoop contest.”

Kofi puts Jericho in a chinlock and avoids a dropkick to keep Chris in trouble. Big E.’s Warrior Splash and a Woods legdrop get two, followed by the abdominal stretch. The Big Ending doesn’t work though and Jericho makes the tag to Styles as everything speeds up. The moonsault into the reverse DDT (still botched a bit but it was closer this time) drops Woods and everything breaks down. Trouble in Paradise hits Henry but Jericho takes a bullet for AJ in a nice moment of friendship. AJ grabs the Calf Crusher to make Woods tap at 11:19.

Rating: C-. Standard six man Smackdown main event here but it was little more than a way to set up Jericho and Styles as a regular team. Henry could have been anyone else here and the story would have been the same. AJ and Jericho were the stars here and it’s pretty clear that we’re going to see the two of them getting a shot at the belts in Dallas.

Overall Rating: C-. This was far more about the video packages than anything else and you can almost guarantee that is the norm going into Wrestlemania season. The wrestling was nothing to see here but we got some decent storyline development. Above all else it’s nice to see the stories flow from Raw to Smackdown and then back to Raw instead of Raw, then Smackdown as bonus material before we get back to Monday. Not a good show or anything here but it got some stuff done.

Results

League of Nations b. Lucha Dragons/Neville/Dolph Ziggler – Brogue Kick to Neville

D-Von Dudley b. Jimmy Uso – Rollup

Kevin Owens b. Big Show via countout

Natalya b. Becky Lynch via DQ when Tamina and Naomi interfered

R-Truth b. Heath Slater – Backslide

AJ Styles/Chris Jericho/Mark Henry b. New Day – Calf Crusher to Woods

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

I’ve been asked to talk about Roman Reigns vs. HHH and the Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon/Undertaker stuff so here’s a column about both of them (in different sections) plus some other news that makes me shake my head.

http://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-road-work-to-be-done/

NXT
Date: February 24, 2016
Location: CFE Arena, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves

As has been the case recently, this is going to be about fallout from last week and the main event in particular. Last week, Samoa Joe and Sami Zayn went to a double pin in a match for the #1 contendership, meaning we don’t have a challenger for Finn Balor. Odds are that won’t be established tonight either but odds are we’ll get a fun show out of it anyway. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

American Alpha vs. Blake and Murphy

Gable and Murphy get things going with Chad easily taking him down into a leg lock. The good guys start in on the arm as Corey talks about Chad being able to dribble a bowling ball. Blake comes in and is quickly ridden down to the mat. Some rapid fire dropkicks (and a Ricky Morton reference) has the bad guys in trouble as Chad waits in the middle. A double dropkick puts Blake on the floor and we take a break.

Back with Jordan staying on the arm and Gable doing the same. You don’t often see the good guys in control this long. Blake’s slam doesn’t get him away from the armbar but the heels FINALLY get him into the corner to take over. We hit a chinlock on Gable for a bit before it’s back to Blake for forearms to the head.

A double arm crank keeps things slow and the heels keep pulling Gable away from the hot tag. You can only do that so many times before it stops working though and the hot tag brings in Jordan for the series of suplexes. Murphy’s dropkick is swatted away and the Grand Amplitude puts Blake away at 13:37. That’s a long match for a non-main event in NXT.

Rating: C+. Nice match here even though it was a glorified squash until the ending. American Alpha is clearly the real deal and ready to give the titles some much needed energy. Blake and Murphy on the other hand have smacked their heads against the glass ceiling and I’m really not sure where they’re supposed to go from here.

We look back at the ending to last week’s show.

Regal says we’ll be seeing Sami vs. Joe in a 2/3 falls match in two weeks. As for next week though, there’s a new talent debuting.

Elias Samson song.

Christopher Girard vs. Apollo Crews

Girard is indy star Biff Busick in his NXT debut. Crews punches him into the corner to start and scores with a quick dropkick. Busick comes back with a running European uppercut (From an indy wrestler? You don’t say.) and a chinlock, which he flips backwards to keep Crews in trouble. Another elbow to the face sets up another chinlock as this is starting to drag. Crews gets up with a spear and a running corner splash, followed by the toss into the helicopter bomb for the pin at 5:12.

Rating: D+. You shouldn’t need two extended chinlocks in a five minute match. Girard has a really good look and a lot of intensity but the offense isn’t exactly working so far. He seems similar to Tommaso Ciampa, which makes you wonder why they bothered signing two people who seem so much alike. Then again, you certainly can’t tell how a career is going to go based off one match and it wasn’t a disaster.

We look back at Carmella vs. Bayley from two weeks ago with Eva Marie and Nia Jax attacking until Asuka made the save.

Carmella and Bayley are ready for Eva and Nia tonight. They’re friends now but Carmella wants another shot at the title. Bayley isn’t worried about Asuka, even though she’s going to be a threat down the line.

Tommaso Ciampa vs. Bull Dempsey

Bull takes 40 seconds to get his shirt off and we get some jumping jacks before any contact. Ciampa wants a test of strength but is quickly run over, setting up a rolling backsplash from Bull. Back up and Ciampa easily drops him with some hard shots and he rips at Bull’s face. Ciampa starts cranking on the arm but misses a charge in the corner, allowing Bull to fire off the left hands. Not that it matters as a Fujiwara Armbar with Ciampa flipping over onto Bull’s back is good for the submission at 4:18.

Rating: D+. I’m pretty sure this is it for Dempsey in NXT and it’s not like he’s going to be that missed. He’s just a comedy jobber and you can put almost anyone into that spot. Ciampa was fine and it’s nice to see him win a match instead of put up a good fight and then lose in the end.

Joe says the announcement means Sami has to suffer twice and that’s just fine with him.

Sami sounds a bit nervous about the two out of three falls match but this is why he came back from the shoulder injury. He’s ready though because his goal is to be the first ever two time NXT Champion.

Carmella/Bayley vs. Nia Jax/Eva Marie

Carmella starts with some Thesz Presses and left hands to Eva, followed by a double suplex to give Bayley a quick two. That means it’s time for Nia to throw Bayley around and easily block a rollup attempt. Eva comes back in and is booed out of the arena, only to have Bayley take her down like the easy target that she is.

We take a break and come back with Carmella holding Eva in a headlock on the mat. Eva gets up and makes the tag off to Nia, who plants Carmella with a shoulder breaker. It’s back to Eva for her grunting based offense, including a choke in the corner. Something like a cobra clutch from Nia keeps the villains in control and she swings Carmella around with ease.

Nia misses a charge and falls out to the floor though, allowing the hot tag to Bayley. The running elbows in the corner have Eva in trouble (like, more trouble than her trying to work a match) but Nia breaks up the cover off the Bayley to Belly. Carmella comes back in for her leg crossface with Nia making another save. Jax drops three straight legs on Carmella, allowing Eva to get the pin at 11:34.

Rating: C-. Nothing to see here but I hope that doesn’t mean we’ll be seeing more of Nia and Eva as a one and a fourth headed monster. Carmella clearly wasn’t going anywhere near the title for a long time so having her take the fall here makes the most sense. Eva is still doing well in this heel role but the heat isn’t what it was before.

Regal and Balor are in the back with the boss talking about how Balor is approaching the longest reign in NXT Title history. Therefore, next week he’ll be facing Neville. No word on if that’s a title match or not.

Overall Rating: C. Not their strongest episode but it set up stuff for the next few weeks as well as helped to confirm a lot of what we’re likely to see down in Dallas. This was your usual breezy episode of NXT and it’s nice to not come into a show dreading how bad it might be on any given week.

Results

American Alpha b. Blake and Murphy – Grand Amplitude to Blake

Apollo Crews b. Christopher Girard – Helicopter Bomb

Tommaso Ciampa b. Bull Dempsey – Fujiwara Armbar

Eva Marie/Nia Jax b. Bayley/Carmella – Eva pinned Carmella after three legdrops from Jax

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Nitro #260
Date: October 2, 2000
Location: Cow Palace, San Francisco, California
Attendance: 2,666
Commentators: Mark Madden, Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone

Tonight is the night. After several months, if not years, of waiting we FINALLY get to see what the wrestling world has been waiting for: Mike Tenay is getting in the ring for a match. Yes indeed. Somehow, this is the point we’ve reached. We also might find out something about the fate of the World Title and Russo has a surprise for Goldberg on top of it, but Tenay is wrestling tonight. Let’s get to it.

On a side note, check out the attendance. Back in February 1998, the same arena did 12,620 for SuperBrawl VIII. Earlier in 2000, also at the Cow Palace, they drew 8,569 for SuperBrawl X. In six months they’ve lost about 6,000 fans and in two and a half years they’ve lost 10,000 fans. In two and a half years, 10,000 have decided that they don’t want to waste their money on WCW anymore.

That’s ignoring the fact that those were pay per views, meaning this show was likely cheaper. Also, less than 2,000 of these tickets were actually paid. If you want to see (arguably) the biggest reason why WCW died, there it is: people stopped coming to see it. If San Francisco, which wasn’t even a major city for them, has shed 10,000 paying fans in less than three years, how bad do you think it is around the country? On top of THAT, how bad do you think the arena is going to look with a minimum of 10,000 empty seats?

Here are the Filthy Animals with the Disqo Duck. After Konnan suggests that Disqo has been, ahem, enjoying one of the Duck’s holes, Konnan wants to hang the Duck above the ring and have a ladder match RIGHT NOW. Madden: “It’s duck season, not wabbit season.”

Konnan/Rey Mysterio vs. Boogie Knights

That would be Disqo/Alex Wright of course. The announcers sound terrified that they could possibly be called the Boogie Knights in a semi-funny bit. This is a ladder match with Wright springboarding in to take over, allowing Disqo to crush Konnan with the ladder in the corner. Rey comes in with a Thesz Press using the ladder and puts the Knights inside and underneath said ladder, setting up an Atomic Arabian Facebuster to crush both guys.

The double Nutcracker Suite keeps the Knights down and Rey flip dives over the top to take Alex out. A Last Dance allows Disqo to climb (Hudson: “A last chance for the duck snatch!”) but Rey takes him down with a sunset bomb. Konnan climbs up and gets the Duck for the win in less than five minutes.

Rating: D+. So the match is four and a half minutes, the Knights lose their first match, AND THEY WERE FIGHTING OVER A DUCK. What am I supposed to say to this? Madden making duck puns was the most entertaining thing in the match. As in him saying the Knights were “mallardjusted” and losing as a result. That’s your highlight here.

Post match the Knights beat the Animals down with the Duck.

David Flair brings in a man wearing a hood and bound by handcuffs. Tonight the man is going to confess, which presumably means he’s the father.

Russo, now out of his neck brace, says he’s not an athlete so he’s relinquishing the World Title. That means we’re getting a title match tonight between Jeff Jarrett and Scott Steiner for the vacant belt. As for Goldberg, he showed what a coward he was last week and he’s lucky that Russo didn’t file charges for assault. This brings Goldberg to the ring to call out Russo, who says he’s got plans. Hopefully those plans involve actually looking at the camera instead of being just a few inches off like he was in the promo.

Cue Russo in a Popemobile (with Borash driving) as Goldberg plows through security. Russo wants Goldberg to feel his pain so he’s got an idea. Starting tonight, Goldberg has to break his streak of 176-0 to get another shot at the World Title. If he loses once, he’s out of WCW. Goldberg goes after Borash and finds the keys but cue Meng to attack Goldberg with the Death Grip. Russo announces Meng as Goldberg’s first opponent for later tonight.

Now this is an idea I can get behind a bit more than most of Russo’s nonsense because there’s an actual plot. You can see where this should go over the next few months with a clear hero and villain. In other words, things are a bit calmer and in theory, Goldberg will get his hands on Russo at some point. Unfortunately that’s something so rare in WCW that it’s really hard to get behind it.

Russo says he’s leaving tonight so Mike Sanders is in charge. Sanders leaves the room and Russo tells Borash to keep an eye on Mike tonight.

Actor Chuck Zito is out for commentary.

Hardcore Title; Sgt. AWOL vs. Reno

The title is vacant coming in. AWOL knocks Reno out of the air with a trashcan to start and it’s already time for a chair. Reno comes back and goes after Zito for no apparent reason before pounding on AWOL even more. Cue Big Vito to cane Reno, allowing AWOL to chokeslam Reno through a table for the pin and the title.

Post match here’s Sanders to say that Reno is champion due to the interference.

The Cat has announced that Booker T. and Sting are the top two contenders instead of Jarrett and Steiner.

David has handcuffed the hooded guy to a dressing room rack. The hooded guy has some very large arms.

Here are Shane and Torrie to talk about being the real first couple of wrestling. Torrie wants to see Shane in action and it’s time for a match.

Shane Douglas vs. Mike Awesome

Shane takes him right into the corner to start but Mike takes the fight to the floor. Lex Luger, who wrestled a match on Thunder, is sitting in the crowd as a fan. Awesome loads up a table (three matches so far and we’ve had a ladder and back to back tables) and tries for the Awesome Bomb, only to have Torrie open her top to show off a skin colored swimsuit top. The distraction lets Shane grab the Franchiser for the pin.

Tygress goes after Torrie post match and Konnan has to run out to save her from Shane.

Jarrett and Steiner want Sanders to fix this thing with Booker and Sting. Nash and the Thrillers come in and don’t say much.

Nash tries to give Sanders a pep talk to go after the Cat.

Video on Meng.

Meng says (yes says) that Goldberg dies tonight. Apparently if he loses, he’s out of WCW too.

Sanders has fixed things somehow.

Meng vs. Goldberg

Slugout, Meng misses a kick, spear, Jackhammer, pin in less than 40 seconds.

Goldberg says that’s #1 but here’s Kronik to beat Goldberg down. High Times plants him and apparently some souls have been sold.

Sanders’ solution: Steiner/Sting vs. Booker/Jarrett with the winning team facing each other for the title later tonight.

David pours water on the hooded guy. You can see the same rope tattoo that Buff Bagwell has on his arm.

Jeff Jarrett/Booker T. vs. Sting/Scott Steiner

Sting and Jarrett get things going with Sting avoiding a monkey flip attempt and hitting Jeff in the chest. The running bulldog sets up the Stinger Splash but a poke to the eye breaks up the Scorpion. It’s off to Booker vs. Steiner with Scott bailing to the floor as we’re already stalling. Back in and Steiner pounds him down until Booker hits a quick kick to the face.

Now it’s off to Sting vs. Booker to make things a bit more interesting. Booker’s headlock is countered with a hiptoss before it’s Sting grabbing a headlock of his own. This is straight out of the totally average match they had at Spring Stampede but the announcers called it amazing anyway. Steiner low bridges Booker out to the floor, only to get beaten down by Jarrett as things get weird again.

Things settle back down with Steiner clotheslining Booker and dropping the elbow. Booker gets tied up in the Tree of Woe but pops out like a daisy from the snow, setting up a spinebuster on Scott. Jeff comes in to stay on Steiner (still odd to see), only to get caught in a spinning belly to belly. Scott rolls over and makes the hot tag off to Sting as everything breaks down. The announcers try to figure out who is legal as Booker ax kicks Steiner. The side kick hits the referee (because of course) and Jarrett guitars Sting for the pin and the title match later.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t the worst thing in the world as it had more time but the match was the usual brawling mess that they usually have. Above all else though, it’s clear that the wrestlers can go more than two minutes, which makes you wonder why they never do. My best guess: Vince Russo hates wrestling and has no idea how to make it actually work.

Cruiserweight Title: Elix Skipper vs. Mike Sanders

Skipper is ticked off that he has to face Sanders after Nash made fun of him last week (by calling Beetlejuice Elix). Skipper wants to fight Nash at the same time so here are all of the Thrillers. Nash has spent the last 45 minutes telling Beetlejuice that he’s sorry for calling him Skipper. We’re still not ready to go because Sanders has some rules. First of all, Team Canada is banned from ringside. Second, you have to win this match with a powerbomb. Third, let’s just make this a handicap match for fun.

Nash hits Elix in the head with a microphone and we’re ready to go. Sanders gets backdropped out of a powerbomb attempt and Elix kicks him in the head. Did I miss Team Canada turning face? Skipper covers for no count because there’s no powerbomb. That’s enough for Nash as he comes in and decks Skipper before talking about how these kids need to stop taking spots from the veterans.

As he’s talking, Elix goes to the top for a really long missile dropkick before hammering away on Nash. We look at Luger in the crowd again and miss Nash taking over again. Nash doesn’t like Skipper calling himself a Canadian so it’s a powerbomb to give Sanders the title. I’m not going to rate this due to how much of it was spent on miniature Nash promos but as usual it was an angle disguised as a match.

Goldberg tries to leave but Terry Taylor tells him that he has another match tonight.

Nash goes to take a shower when Team Canada jumps the Thrillers from behind. Lance Storm and Jim Duggan have the Thrillers cowering in all of ten seconds because that’s what WCW thinks of those guys.

Goldberg vs. Harris Brothers

A spear and a Jackhammer give Goldberg two pins in thirty seven seconds, as in two seconds faster than he beat Meng.

The Thrillers are begging Nash for help, even though the simple answer would seem to be BEAT THE CANADIANS TO A PULP BECAUSE THERE ARE ONLY TWO OF THEM RIGHT NOW.

The World Title match will now be a 49ers match. There will be a box at each corner with the belt in one of them. Whoever finds it is the champion. So the title is being decided in a scavenger hunt. Also note that the other three boxes will have weapons. Remember that.

David Flair brings out the guy in a hood. Flair slaps him in the head a few times and promises to embarrass him before removing the handcuffs. As expected, the guy immediately stands up and takes off the hood to reveal that it’s Buff Bagwell. The beating is quickly on and Buff scores with a Blockbuster before leaving.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Jeff Jarrett

The title is vacant coming in. Jarrett has no guitar and it’s actually really strange to not see it. They head outside to start with Jeff taking over. It’s already time for the first box and it’s…..a blowup doll. Yeah here we go. Booker comes back with a side slam and goes for another box which has a picture of Scott Hall. That’s actually used as a weapon as the picture is smashed over Jeff’s head, leaving him next to the doll.

Booker goes for a third box but Jeff sends him outside for a save. Jeff gets smart by hitting him in the head with a box but can’t get a piledriver. Instead Booker grabs one of his own onto the announcers’ table which doesn’t break in an always scary looking sight. That means it’s time to open the third box, which contains a glove.

There’s nothing special about the glove (it looks like one you might use while working in your yard) but the announcers declare it a coal miner’s glove, meaning it would be weighted. You know what? Well done by them for trying to make this even the slightest bit serious. Russo clearly isn’t going to give them anything to work with so it’s nice to see them trying to do it themselves.

Jeff takes Booker down and grabs the glove, though you have to wonder why he isn’t going after the only box left which must contain the title. A glove shot to the ribs allows Jarrett to pose before breaking another box over Booker’s head instead of going for the box. Booker pops back up for the save, only to eat a gloved shot to the jaw.

Jeff STILL won’t go up so it’s time for a sleeper. To be fair, Booker was up quickly after the shot to the jaw, which shows another problem of the match: the guys have been fighting over the glove like it means something but they can’t decide if it knocks the other guy out or not. Booker easily fights out of the sleeper and grabs one of his own, only to get suplexed down.

Back up and Jeff tries a top rope glove shot to the head but dives into a Bookend. Jeff makes another save but the Stroke is countered into the ax kick. ANOTHER save keeps us going and Booker’s ax kick hits the ropes. An electric chair out of the corner drops Booker but Jeff STILL WON’T CLIMB. Cue Beetlejuice of all people to hit Jeff low, allowing Booker to get the box down for the win and the title.

Rating: C. This one might require some explanation. Yeah the match sucked, yeah there was a severe lack of logic and yeah there were a ton of holes here, but I don’t put that on the wrestlers. It’s not their fault that they had fifteen minutes to spend on a ridiculous gimmick that the booker clearly wasn’t taking seriously. Maybe this could have gone better had five matches (out of an eight match show) combine to go ten minutes and they didn’t have to stall as long as they did before the ending involving a “celebrity”. This was horrible, but I’m not about to blame that on the guys who were asked to make something out of this disaster.

Post match Steiner comes out to hit Booker with a pipe and put Beetlejuice in the Recliner to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. So Goldberg runs through people to start a new segment (fine enough in theory but I have no reason to believe it works long term) and then the rest of the show is all downhill from there. There’s just way too much insanity at this point and it’s almost impossible to keep track of what’s going on out there. As usual you have gimmicks all over the place, illogical stories and ideas and the old guys being pushed instead of the new talent who could use a rub. The problem continues to be the same thing as always: Vince Russo doesn’t know how to book a wrestling show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

It’s two years old today.  It feels like it’s been around forever.

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 23, 2016
Location: Wembley Arena, London, England
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s another special show tonight as we have Lockdown, meaning everything is inside a steel cage, even if the feud might not have warranted that yet. The main event is Matt Hardy defending the World Title against Ethan Carter III in Carter’s rematch after the title was stolen away from him a few weeks back. Let’s get to it.

The opening video explains Lockdown and the main event.

Beer Money vs. Eric Young/Bram

In a cage, like all other matches tonight. They start fighting in the aisle with Storm hitting Bram in the head with a beer. The fight goes inside quickly enough but first up Bram gives Storm the Brighter Side of Suffering on the floor. That leaves Roode inside in a glorified handicap match with Roode down two to one. Bram is quickly taken down though, allowing Roode to hit a Blockbuster on Young. Storm climbs in over the top and sends Bram into the cage ten straight times to drop him off the top.

Beer Money starts cleaning house but Bram breaks up a double suplex on Young. Roode is fast enough to catapult Young into Bram for a top rope crotching, setting up a hurricanrana and a top rope splash for two. DWI is broken up and Eric suplexes Roode down. Last Call hits Young but Bram spinwheel kicks Storm to put everyone on the mat. It’s Beer Money up first with the double suplex on Young, setting up DWI for the pin on Bram at 8:30.

Rating: C. Hopefully this makes Bram and Young shut up for a bit though there’s no reason to assume that’s going to happen. Beer Money continues to be their usual solid selves though they’re really not doing anything other than going on a nostalgia run. The match was fine but I still have no desire to see Young and Bram as a team again.

Madison Rayne has been attacked because this is TNA and they only know about three angles for their female wrestlers.

Here’s Ethan to sit on the steps for a promo. He can’t wait to fight here in foggy old London town because Matt Hardy has tried to do whatever he can to mess with Ethan. Whether it’s having Tyrus interfere or cave Ethan’s head in with a chair, it’s just delaying the reality that Matt can’t beat him. However, speaking of being alone, Ethan needs to talk about Rockstar Spud.

After the Rockstar comes to the ring, Ethan talks about their history and admits that he was wrong. They slowly shake hands and Spud says he’ll always do what’s right. Spud isn’t scared of Matt or Tyrus because he’s Rockstar Spud and no one tells him what to do. This brings out Matt and company to say that everything belongs to him. The Matt Hardy Brand has absorbed the Impact Wrestling Brand and if Spud comes anywhere near the cage tonight, his life will be destroyed. Carter says bring it.

A British man (the unnamed Jimmy Havoc) says Rosemary was his before she was Crazzy Steve’s. They’re good for each other and he’s getting her back.

X-Division Title: Tigre Uno vs. Trevor Lee

Lee is defending and has Gregory Shane Helms in his corner. Tigre grabs a quick rollup to start before nailing Lee in the head to put him down. The champ comes right back with some choking on the bottom rope, followed by a release gutwrench suplex. A quick kick to the head staggers Lee and Tigre sends him into the cage a few times.

Uno gets two off a top rope legdrop between Lee’s legs before climbing up the cage. Lee’s save doesn’t work as Tigre kicks him down, only to dive down with a huge high cross body and an equally large crash. The delayed cover only gets two and Trevor gets up with a knee to the head. The fisherman’s buster retains Trevor’s title at 6:16. Josh: “Tigre just wanted to have that Lockdown moment.” Give me a break.

Rating: C-. You remember those first two times where Trevor beat Tigre with the fisherman’s buster? Well this one was inside a cage. Hopefully this lets us move on to something else as there’s really no point to this feud continuing. I’m assuming Helms either isn’t going to wrestle or will be facing Lee at some point in the future, either of which is only kind of interesting.

Maria runs into Gail Kim and talks about leading the Knockouts. Gail is REALLY QUITE SERIOUS and tells Maria to get in the ring if she wants to be a leader.

Havoc gives Rosemary something which he says will make her remember how they are together. Steve comes up and grabs it, resulting in them staring at each other.

Dollhouse vs. Gail Kim/Velvet Sky/???

Lethal Lockdown meaning WarGames with the fall not being allowed to take place until all six (in theory) are in. Gail and Jade start things off by trading hurricanranas and kicking each other off the cage walls. They collide in the middle and we take a break with no one new coming out yet. Back with Marti Bell joining after a “five minute” (read as over seven) period ends. Marti beats on Gail for a minute until Velvet Sky comes in to even things up. Velvet cleans house for another minute until Rebel completes the Dollhouse, meaning it’s time for weapons.

The Dollhouse starts beating up Velvet in the corner until the clock runs down again. Maria comes out to the apron but shakes her head and decides not to come in. Instead she locks the cage door, allowing Gail and Velvet to get beaten down. Velvet fights back by avoiding a charge in the corner and fighting back with a kendo stick. Gail gets a stick of her own and Rebel is pinballed between forearms and stick shots. Marti makes the save with a cookie sheet, only to have Gail hit Eat Defeat for two on Rebel. Jade’s package piledriver onto a chair puts Gail away at 14:50.

Rating: C. Well that happened. The Dollhouse and the Beautiful People will likely keep feuding because that’s how the Knockouts work. Gail will go on to be serious against anyone who comes into the division, even though nothing new ever comes from it. Maria could be interesting, but this was really just more long than good.

Kurt Angle gives Ethan a pep talk. It turns out that Ethan, who made Kurt’s life miserable, is a fan.

Decay video.

Here’s Kurt with something to say to the live crowd. He talks about having so many great matches in this country, including one last year where he won the TNA World Title. Lashley comes out to say the last year has been in his head, but he’s going to get revenge. He wants to have one more match with Kurt where they tear the roof off the house before he gets his revenge. The fans want Kurt to get the final win but Lashley knows he can win on Kurt’s best day. Kurt wants to go right now but Lashley walks away with a smile.

Eli Drake is in the ring and wants to talk about Odarg the Great. Grado was fired a few weeks back and now he’s running around with a mask and singlet on, trying to hide his identity. Cue Odarg, which Josh thinks is Grado spelled backwards and it’s time for a match.

Odarg the Great vs. Eli Drake

Josh complains about how everyone knows what’s going on and how they have to be stupid and sit through it. This coming from the man who called fans idiots for pointing out plot holes in TNA’s stories. Odarg can’t pull himself over the top so he pokes Eli in the face and goes for the door but Jesse Godderz holds it shut. The mask starts to come off so we pause a bit for Odarg to fix things. Drake slams him down and suplexes Odarg into the cage. It’s still too early to climb out though and Odarg brings him down with an electric chair.

Drake can’t crawl out so Jesse tries to help, only to have Mahabali Shera come out to take care of Jesse. The tug of war causes Drake’s trunks to come halfway down, meaning it’s time to censor stuff. Odarg hits a Cannonball in the corner and very slowly climbs over, allowing Drake to come up the cage. He grabs the mask but Odarg falls down and loses the mask for the win at 6:32.

Rating: D. I still like the story, though could they find a way to not have a guy with a Feast or Fired briefcase lose comedy matches? Grado continues to be one of the few really entertaining things around here right now, even though it might be due to how simple and stupid the story really is.

After his face appears on camera for at least fifteen seconds, Grado covers up and runs off, seemingly more worried about people seeing his bare chest.

Jimmy Havoc gets in Decay’s faces and calls himself hardcore. The beatdown ensues and Rosemary leaves his present (which looked like some kind of a mask) on top of him.

Eli Drake tells Billy Corrgan to have Grado (sans mask) thrown out and that’s exactly what the Harris Twins do.

Mike Bennett can’t believe that people think anything of Drew Galloway because he carries around a briefcase.

TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Hardy

Hardy is defending. Ethan draws a line on the mat and it’s time to slug it out. Matt’s chops don’t have much effect but Ethan’s splash hits the cage. It’s time for a chair with Matt getting in some good shots, only to have the Twist of Fate broken up as Matt is sent head first into the chair in the corner. Another Twist is broken up so Matt settles for the Side Effect and a two count.

The champ grabs a chain but walks into a TK3 (TKO) to give Ethan a chance. Tyrus blocks the way so Ethan flips him off, drawing the big man in. Ethan runs the ropes and has a free chance to get out but opts to clothesline Tyrus instead. A Big Ending drops Carter but he’s still able to reverse an attempt at being chained to the cage. Instead it’s Tyrus being chained up but Matt grabs a Twist of Fate for two.

Carter is back up in time to pull Matt off the cage to put both guys down. Matt is up first and hits a low blow, setting up a Twist of Fate with Ethan’s neck in a chair. Of course that’s not enough to finish it so Ethan kicks Matt low to even things up. A slow double crawl towards the door draws out Reby with a hammer but Spud comes out for the save. Then, in the swerve that isn’t a swerve, Spud slams the door on Carter’s head to turn heel and help Matt get out to retain at 11:39.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but it’s ANOTHER heel turn as Matt has to get another minion because he’s this iconic power or whatever line TNA is pushing this week. I do however like the fact that Spud didn’t just align with Carter again because Ethan turned. That’s some nice continuity, but sweet goodness I’m tired of these big heel turns when there are already about four faces on the roster as it is.

Post match Spud gives Carter a Conchairto on the chair to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I don’t remember the last time I was this uninterested in TNA. I don’t know if it’s Josh being more annoying than Matt Striker could ever hope to be, the constant waiting on Kurt’s retirement match, everyone turning heel or the fact that Matt Hardy is on top, but this show is getting harder and harder to sit through. It’s not that the quality is horrible but I’m having a lot of trouble getting into any of the stories.

Overall this show just wasn’t very interesting. They’re trying really hard to turn Matt into this top level heel and for the life of me I don’t get the appeal. Like, are they really that obsessed with doing Matt vs. Jeff at Slammiversary and/or Bound For Glory? We really need to see that match again in 2016? Not a great show here, but that’s just what happens in TNA these days because they don’t have a roster deep enough to pull this off these days.

Results

Beer Money b. Eric Young/Bram – DWI to Bram

Trevor Lee b. Tigre Uno – Fisherman’s buster

Dollhouse b. Gail Kim/Velvet Sky – Package piledriver onto a chair to Kim

Odarg the Great b. Eli Drake – Odarg escaped the cage

Matt Hardy b. Ethan Carter III – Hardy escaped the cage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 22, 2016
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s a big night for Raw as we’re done with Fastlane and have less than six weeks before the biggest night of the year. In addition to that we also have the presentation of the first ever Vincent J. McMahon Award and the fallout from Brock Lesnar attacking Dean Ambrose before the show started tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the triple threat main event from last night with Reigns pinning Ambrose to earn the title shot.

Opening sequence.

Cole tells us about Brock attacking Dean as he got to the arena earlier today and we see the video. Ambrose was put in a neck brace and driven away in an ambulance.

Vince McMahon comes out to present the Vincent J. McMahon Sr. Legacy of Excellence Award (which seems to be the same trophy that was give to Hornswoggle for winning a video game tournament a few years back). McMahon talks about his family’s history of presenting sports entertainment for over 100 years and how it was all about a legacy. That’s the kind of person we’re honoring tonight so Vince brings out the first recipient: Stephanie McMahon.

Stephanie comes out to a chorus of boos as Vince tries to tell her how much she deserves this award. She didn’t expect to win but she happens to have a speech prepared. Stephanie starts talking about how much of an honor this is but hoe she couldn’t do this without her husband…..and here’s SHANE MCMAHON of all people to interrupt. The place goes NUTS at this and actually does a big old YES chant for the white haired Shane. Vince asks for a hug or a handshake but Shane isn’t interested.

Shane seems genuinely choked up as he thanks the fans. It’s quickly off to the reason he’s here though: this Award, which Stephanie doesn’t deserve. Stephanie rips into him a bit but Shane says she really doesn’t know. Apparently Stephanie and HHH have been running this company into the ground, such as the stock price, the ratings and all of the injuries. Stephanie calls Shane a quitter so Shane asks if Vince wants to tell her. Years ago, Vince screwed up big time and Shane was there to save things.

Shane was able to take some time off but he never lost his place in line. The reason Stephanie has gotten this far is because Shane let it happen. Stephanie doesn’t buy this but Vince looks….somewhere between annoyed and terrified. Stephanie offers Shane a spot at Wrestlemania this year but Vince cuts her off to talk to his son. Vince asks her to leave but Shane says it’s all true because at the time it was best for business. She finally leaves but not before saying she’ll never forgive Shane for screwing this up.

Vince offers to give Shane another big check to make this go away but this isn’t about money. Every morning, Shane wakes up and is so glad to have his freedom. This is about legacy though because the McMahon Family with Shane’s children now the fifth generation. Shane finally gets to the point: he wants control of Monday Night Raw. Vince says it’s not that easy because the company is in a different place now. Shane wants to make sure that there’s a generation for the future.

That just ticks Vince off but he has an idea. He’ll give Shane what he wants if Shane has one match on one night. However, if Shane loses, he loses possession of anything he has over Vince’s head. The deal is on so Vince says something that has to be censored. Shane goes to leave but Vince stops him to name the specifics. Naturally the match is at Wrestlemania and the opponent is……the Undertaker, inside the Cell.

Neville/Lucha Dragons vs. New Day

Kalisto and Woods get things going and Xavier is sent to the floor as we take a break. Back with Kalisto coming in to work on Woods’ arm before it’s off to Big E. for a belly to belly on Neville. The Unicorn Stampede keeps Neville in trouble and Kofi nails a running boot to the face. Kofi’s dropkick keeps Neville down and Woods gets two as we take another break.

Back again with Big E. staying on Neville and standing on his wrist to keep Neville away from making the tag. Woods gets backdropped face first onto the steps, allowing Neville to kick Kofi away and make the tag off to Sin Cara. Everything breaks down and Cara hits a springboard back elbow to drop Kofi.

A standing Lionsault gets two on Kofi with Big E. making the save, only to get kicked to the floor for a Neville 450 from the apron. Woods does a springboard off Neville’s back onto Woods, leaving Kofi to avoid a Swanton Bomb, tear at Cara’s mask and hit Trouble in Paradise for the pin on Cara at 15:30.

Rating: C+. Fun match here, though it’s a bit overly long with the extra break not really adding anything. You had to know that was coming after the long opening segment though so there really wasn’t a big surprise. New Day certainly wasn’t face here and that’s probably better for them at this point. Let them drop the belts to someone (new hopefully) and then let them turn face after Wrestlemania.

Roman Reigns doesn’t have an update on Dean Ambrose but is ready for his one on one fight at Wrestlemania against HHH. That night, it’s all about his fist and his heart. Reigns likes his odds.

Here are Heyman and Lesnar with something to say. Heyman says this will be the main event of the evening even though Brock isn’t even in his wrestling gear. It doesn’t matter what Lesnar is doing because he’s the main event. Last night Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns got beaten up by Brock Lesnar. If the Undertaker tapped out to Brock Lesnar, Roman certainly was going to as well.

However, Dean Ambrose saved his buddy and turned a wrestling match into a street fight. This ticked off Brock Lesnar so earlier today, Brock attacked Dean as he arrived at the arena. After looking at the clip from earlier, Heyman says there is no shield that can protect Dean from Brock Lesnar. HHH and Roman Reigns can kid themselves all they want by saying they’re the main event when Brock is on the card. Brock needs a new Wrestlemania opponent so Heyman issues a warning to anyone in the locker room.

Go to the hospital tonight and visit Dean to ask what happens when you invoke the wrath of Brock Lesnar. They go to leave and of course, RIGHT ON TIME, here’s the ambulance with Dean inside. Cole: “What is going on?” Man you called the 1999 Royal Rumble. I’m thinking you should know this.

Dean rips the neck brace off as he crawls down the ramp towards the ring. Brock runs him over with a single shot and keeps walking to the back. Makes sense. Dean grabs a mic and says he’s indestructible, which Brock is going to find out the hard way. We get the challenge for Wrestlemania in a no holds barred street fight. Brock comes back to ringside for an F5 on the floor, which Heyman means is a yes.

Usos vs. Ascension

Before the match, here are the Dudley Boyz to interrupt. Bubba apologizes for what they did a few weeks back, even though they’re the most decorated team in wrestling history. Their legacy won’t be defined by a piece of furniture but rather by their accomplishments. That’s why you’ll never see a table again. Speaking of accomplishments, maybe the Usos’ daddy (Rikishi) should have spent more time around them instead of going all over the place.

That’s not much of an insult but it allows Ascension to jump them from behind to start. Konor kicks Jimmy in the face and Viktor drops a fist for two. Jey gets the hot tag a few seconds later as house is cleaned. Viktor dives into a double superkick and the Superfly Splash is good for the pin at 1:57.

Here’s Chris Jericho with something to say. He’s heard about AJ Styles for years and then last night he was defeated by Styles for the second time. He’d like AJ to come out and see him face to face. Cue Styles, who Jericho thanks for proving something last night. AJ has proven that he belongs here in the WWE and he has everything it takes to go to the top and become a champion. Jericho knows that AJ is phenomenal…..and here are the Social Outcasts.

Slater thinks this is pathetic but Bo finds it really beautiful. Slater: “Bo, I was being sarcastic.” Dallas: “Oh yeah. Me too.” The Outcasts don’t buy Y2AJ as a thing but Jericho tells Slater to shut up. They weren’t going to be a team but they’d be glad to if it means getting the Outcasts out of here.

Chris Jericho/AJ Styles vs. Heath Slater/Curtis Axel

This is joined in progress with AJ dropkicking Slater and hitting the basement forearm. Slater powers out of the Clash by sending Heath to the apron, only to have the other Outcasts interfere to take over. Axel stomps him down in the corner and it’s back to Slater for a chinlock. That goes nowhere and it’s the hot tag off to Jericho as everything breaks down. AJ springboard forearms onto Slater, leaving Jericho to make Axel tap to the Walls at 4:02.

Rating: C-. Maybe New Day vs. AJ/Jericho for the Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania? I’ve certainly heard worse ideas so why not get them on there and give AJ a quick title? I mean, it’s not like there’s a long line to get to the top of the tag division. If nothing else, Kofi vs. AJ could be quite the entertaining segment.

We recap the long opening segment.

HHH tells Stephanie to shake off what happened earlier. Stephanie gets to go tell Roman something to make herself feel better.

Post break Roman goes to check on Dean but Stephanie stops him to make Reigns vs. Sheamus for later. The League isn’t happy with the way Reigns is getting all this attention for Wrestlemania and it would be a shame if they hurt Reigns and took him out of Wrestlemania.

Goldust brings R-Truth a cake to make up for what happened last night. R-Truth doesn’t think much of it but the cake has yellow frosting on chocolate, just like them. Goldust knew Truth would turn him down and that’s exactly why they would be great partners. That fascinates Truth, but he’s not going to smash the cake in Goldust’s face. Actually he does just that, again much like a heel would. Goldust eats some of the cake.

Ryback/Big Show/Kane vs. Wyatt Family

Bray is swapped in for Strowman this time. Harper puts his mask on Byron before the match and for some reason Saxton can’t speak. This is joined in progress with Kane and Bray trading big shots before it’s off to Ryback vs. Harper. Ryback slugs away in the corner and brings in Kane, who eats a quick dropkick. JBL goes on about Hansen and Brody before Cole brings up JBL vs. Austin in a beer drinking contest at the first modern Saturday Night’s Main Event.

Ryback cross bodies Rowan and hits two running knees in the corner. A clothesline sends Rowan to the floor and we take a break. Back with Harper getting two off a Michinoku Driver before Rowan drops an elbow on Ryback. The missile dropkick puts Rowan down and a hot tag brings in Big Show to clean house. Rowan gets chokeslammed but Strowman low bridges Show to the floor. Harper kicks away at the face but his sleeper is broken up, allowing the hot tag to bring in Kane. Everything breaks down and Ryback walks out, leaving Bray to hit Sister Abigail for the pin on Kane at 12:27.

Rating: C-. So the big goal of that whole thing was to turn Ryback heel? Thank goodness they jobbed the Wyatts out for the sake of that because they couldn’t have done anything like this otherwise. It’s a nice enough story, but Ryback needs to not look like a loser who can’t win the big one before I’m going to care about him turning heel.

After a break, Ryback says he’s tired of being in tag teams because it’s about him. This isn’t anything personal with Big Show or Kane. He’s just tired of not getting the spotlight, especially after he won the match last night. It’s time to grab the brass ring and break the glass ceiling.

Sasha Banks vs. Naomi

It’s still a thing. Sasha works on the arm to start and blocks a backslide attempt, only to get kicked in the ribs. Tamina pulls Sasha to the floor and we take a break. Back with Naomi still in control until Becky Lynch comes out to deal with Tamina. A quick Bank Statement makes Naomi tap at 6:45. No rating due to the break in the middle but it was fine.

Post match, here’s Charlotte dressed like a Bella. Charlotte is still emotional after beating Brie Bella last night, even though there needs to be a #1 contender. She loves to see the two of them getting so close. “BECKY WATCH OUT!” Becky believes that Sasha is going to attack her and Charlotte laughs because it’s clear that they don’t trust each other. The next few weeks are going to be fun.

After another recap of the opening, Stephanie tells Vince that she refuses to work for Shane. Vince calls it a calculated risk and Stephanie seems a bit calmer.

We get the Godfather Hall of Fame announcement.

Roman Reigns vs. Sheamus

Sheamus goes after the arm that Brock had in the Kimura last night and Roman is in early trouble. Roman comes back with a headbutt and some right hands in the corner as the fans boo loudly. It’s back to a regular armbar until Roman fires off right hands to the head. A big clothesline puts Sheamus on the floor and one from the steps drops him again.

Rusev gets in a kick to the head though and we take a break. Back with both guys down and the League having been ejected. Roman sends him to the floor for another running clothesline before diving into the ring at seven. Cue HHH in fighting clothes and the fight is on so we’ll say the match is a DQ at 10:45.

Rating: D. These two really don’t have good matches together but that’s the perfect way for WWE to push them harder and harder every single time. Sheamus is right back where he belongs: as a midcarder who might win a title every now and then but is really just a guy that can be shuffled around as necessary.

A brawl breaks out as Sheamus has just disappeared. HHH hits him in the face/throat with the bell and then drives Reigns’ face into the table about 25 times. Reigns is badly busted open as the fans are LOUDLY cheering for HHH. A Pedigree onto the steps ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a show almost entirely built around storylines and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially when we’ve got less than six weeks before Wrestlemania. The Shane thing is big and sets up one of the main events, assuming that match actually takes place. I know Shane was awesome at one point, but it’s really a stretch to imagine him as a credible threat to Undertaker inside the Cell.

Other than that though, the wrestling was barely around tonight as everything was focused on getting to Wrestlemania in a hurry. The card is looking stronger now but they still have a long way to go to get out of the funk that Fastlane and its build put them in. Tonight was at least a big step in the right direction though.

Results

New Day b. Lucha Dragons/Neville – Trouble in Paradise to Cara

Usos b. Ascension – Superfly Splash to Viktor

Chris Jericho/AJ Styles b. Heath Slater/Curtis Axel – Walls of Jericho to Axel

Wyatt Family b. Kane/Big Show/Ryback – Sister Abigail to Kane

Sasha Banks b. Naomi – Bank Statement

Roman Reigns b. Sheamus via DQ when HHH interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

And I didn’t see this one coming.Shane McMahon just returned to open Raw.  It seems that only his hair has aged though.

And there’s a video.  In theory this is now a Wrestlemania match, meaning Bray vs. Brock could be off the books.

http://wrestlingrumors.net/brock-lesnar-attacks-dean-ambrose-in-parking-lot-before-tonights-monday-night-raw/

Also, how cool is it to see an actual angle that feels like it’s going on in real life?  Why can that only happen for Wrestlemania?

Fastlane 2016
Date: February 21, 2016
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the second pay per view of the year as we’re getting closer and closer to Wrestlemania. In this case we have a triple threat main event of Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the #1 contendership in what should be one heck of a fight. Any of the three could win and that’s what can make this even better. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Kalisto vs. Alberto Del Rio

Kalisto is defending and this is 2/3 falls. Del Rio goes right after the arm to start but Kalisto kicks away at the knees for a breather. JBL talks about how Goliath wins in real life as Kalisto hits the hurricanrana driver to set up a big dive out to the floor. Back in and Del Rio gets two off a snap suplex with Ranallo (only calling the pre-show) comparing this to a feud between rappers. Kalisto sends him into the post but Del Rio blasts him with a chair for the DQ, giving Kalisto the first fall at 4:05.

For some reason the second fall doesn’t being immediately so Del Rio whips him all around ringside as we take a break. Back with both guys in the ring and Del Rio demanding that the second fall begin. Well I mean Kalisto has only had about three and a half minutes to recover so maybe they should. Del Rio does a standing version of the double stomp in the corner for the pin at 7:35.

The third fall begins less than a minute after the second ends with Del Rio getting two off a clothesline. The full version of the top rope double stomp is countered with a hurricanrana though and Kalisto speeds things up with the corkscrew cross body. Another hurricanrana driver gets two and a running tornado DDT gets the same for the champion. Kalisto gets crotched on top and actually doesn’t counter the reverse superplex into the Salida Del Sol.

Instead Del Rio sends him out to the floor for another double stomp off the barricade. Kalisto dives back in to beat the count at nine and Del Rio is frustrated. He loads up ANOTHER top rope stomp (as in like the fifth one of the match) but Kalisto moves away. They go for what was supposed to be the Salida Del Sol but can’t quite get it, leaving Kalisto to send Del Rio into the buckle for a rollup pin at 14:30.

Rating: C-. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it felt like they were trying to showcase how many different ways Del Rio could do that one stupid move in a row. On top of that, Kalisto doesn’t even get to hit his big finishing move that made him a star in the first place and basically gets squashed until a fluke ending. I’m really not sure why this needed to be 2/3 falls and the match was a step down from their usually good stuff.

The opening video is the Eva Marie racecar theme with a focus on the main event.

Sasha Banks/Becky Lynch vs. Tamina/Naomi

Earlier today, Naomi said she and Tamina put the BAD in Team BAD. Never let her speak again. Becky tries to start but Sasha tags herself in, only to have Becky do the same thing a few seconds later. The quick legdrops nail Tamina with the spinning version getting two. Naomi comes in for her dancing kicks bug Becky throws Tamina down with a suplex and BAD gets dropped on the floor. Naomi comes back with something like a Stunner over the top rope to drop Becky. Unfortunately this means we have to hear the racecar sound effects on every replay which are already old.

Back in and Tamina clotheslines Lynch for two before it’s off to the chinlock. JBL: “Tamina could have been in the APA.” It’s off to Naomi for a legdrop and chinlock of her own before being sent back to the floor. Naomi pulls Sasha off the apron to break up a tag attempt, only to have Becky do some quick house cleaning and dive over for the hot tag to Sasha. It’s time for the knees all around until Naomi misses the double knees in the corner.

A backstabber sets up the Bank Statement but Tamina pulls Sasha out to the floor. Back in and the Rear View gets two, followed by Tamina’s superkick for the same with Becky breaking up the count. Sasha flips out of a double suplex and Becky comes in with a missile dropkick to both of them. The Bank Statement to Tamina and the Disarm-Her to Naomi are good for the double submission at 10:00.

Rating: C. This picked up a lot near the end but the first half was a lot of laying around in chinlocks and rest holds as we sat through Tamina and Naomi trying to have charisma. Naomi is one of those cases where you have to wonder what they were thinking. She’s incredibly athletic but for some reason they decide to make her a heel instead of focusing on all of her national abilities. Such is life in the Divas division.

We look back at the Intercontinental Title changing hands on Monday.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is defending and Dolph’s hair is…..odd. They fight up against the ropes to start and Ziggler eats a headbutt. Owens’ chinlock is countered into something like a rear naked choke as we hear again about Ziggler’s amateur background which he almost never uses. Back up and Ziggler throws him HARD into the buckle for an awkward looking landing. You can tell it’s awkward as they show four replays of the thing.

We hit the chinlock from the champion until Ziggler avoids a charge, sending Owens shoulder first into the post. The rapid fire elbow drops get two for Dolph and Owens crotches him on the ropes to break up the running DDT. The Cannonball gets two, causing the champion to yell at Cole for talking bad about him. Now the DDT connects for two and Dolph loads up a superplex, only to have Kevin reverse into that spinning fisherman’s superplex.

Both guys roll outside with Ziggler superkicking him down for a near ten count. Back in and they trade more superkicks with Owens having to kick out at two and a half. JBL: “We’re at a superkick party!” They go outside again with the apron powerbomb being countered into a hurricanrana to send Owens into the steps. Back in again and Ziggler tunes up the band (which apparently is paying homage to Shawn Michaels because everything has to be), only to nearly kick the referee, allowing the Pop Up Powerbomb to retain Owens’ title at 15:02.

Rating: B-. Just a longer version of any given match they’ve had on Raw in recent months (and by recent I mean several because these guys fight like once every few weeks) with the obvious and logical ending. They tried to pump up the idea of Ziggler in front of his hometown but even then people stopped caring a long time ago. Could it be because Ziggler has been the same guy for years now?

We recap the Wyatts being all evil and attacking the old guys, which of course includes that old rascal Ryback.

Wyatt Family vs. Kane/Big Show/Ryback

Bray is on the floor, sitting in Byron Saxton’s chair. Ryback and Rowan get things going with the bearded one missing a charge in the corner. It’s off to Big Show for the loud chops on Erick’s exposed chest with Ryback coming in again for some of his own. Rowan elbows Ryback down and the tag brings in Harper for a dropkick of all things.

We get the Strowman appearance as the announcers hit all of their standard lines about how big and strong he really is. Like, really, really strong. Braun throws Ryback around and brings Rowan back in, allowing Ryback to hit a quick suplex. The hot tag brings in Kane as Cole brings up the Wyatts abducting Kane a few months back. Yeah remember that? It’s still every bit as stupid. Kane cleans house for a bit until they get him down in the corner to start the slow motion exchanges.

Braun drops an elbow to the back of the head as we get a Bill Kazmeier name drop. A running boot misses in the corner and the hot tag brings in Ryback to clean house. Ryback slams Harper five times in a row (Cole: “This is incredible!” No Cole, it isn’t.) before powerslamming him for good measure. Everything breaks down and Strowman is sent to the floor with Harper being tossed on top of his partners. Show spears (kind of) Strowman and Ryback Meathooks Harper. A Shell Shock (really a Samoan Drop) is enough to pin Harper at 10:36.

Rating: C. What? No really, what? There was no reason to have the Wyatts lose here and you have a team of makeshift goons go over them here? For what? Well at least Ryback got the pin and Bray didn’t…..yeah this isn’t working for me. I mean, how in the world do you have the Wyatts lose here? I honestly do not get this and I really don’t want to imagine where they’re going next.

Roman Reigns talks about how everything changes tonight between himself and Ambrose. Dean comes in and says they’re both going to Wrestlemania but he’s tired of hitchhiking. Reigns: “I wouldn’t book that trip just yet.” Ambrose: “I already booked it! I got a great deal on Priceline!” Neither of them are worried about Lesnar either.

We recap Brie Bella vs. Charlotte, which is built around Daniel Bryan retiring and Charlotte mocking Brie for her husband having to quit. Brie pinned her in a non-title match to earn the shot tonight.

Divas Title: Brie Bella vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and throws Brie (wearing Bryan’s kick pads) down face first to start. That gets us the first mock YES chant of the match as Byron talks about Brie wanting to listen to the birds chirp, sending JBL into a hilarious rant about how stupid that sounds. Brie comes back with some forearms and an armdrag, allowing her to WOO and strut because this is really about Flair.

Charlotte sends her out to the floor for a few moments before Brie counters an Alabama Slam into a sunset flip for two. Back in and Charlotte cranks on both arms but Brie tries (and horribly fails) at a YES Lock attempt, eventually settling for a crucifix for two. A Backpack Stunner breaks up Brie’s sleeper and we hit a Figure Four Neck Lock into those rolling flips. JBL: “Maybe Charlotte is just tired of the birds chirping.”

The BRIE MODE running knee sets up a Nikki Bella forearm for two. Charlotte comes back with chops (because neither of them can do anything but tribute moves) but the Figure Eight is broken up. A dropkick knocks Charlotte outside, followed by a missile dropkick back inside. As is so often the case in a Flair match though, Brie comes up holding her knee.

That doesn’t stop her from firing off the YES Kicks (of course), followed by a Bella Buster for two. The Figure Eight is countered into the YES Lock but Brie swaps that for a half crab to prevent Ric from interfering. Charlotte finally kicks her off and a quick Figure Eight makes Brie tap at 12:14.

Rating: C+. The match was better than it had any right to be but amazingly enough, the combined forces of Daniel Bryan and Nikki Bella weren’t enough to make me care about Brie. That kind of shortcut booking rarely works for me, especially when you have someone like Brie who has been a loser and such a horrible in ring worker for so long. You can’t just forget about that kind of stuff, no matter which of her relatives are hurt. But at least Charlotte got pinned clean, which of course no one is going to remember.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho, which is basically Sami Zayn vs. Cesaro from NXT minus the 2/3 falls stipulation because Kalisto vs. Del Rio needed to go six or seven falls. They split the first two matches and AJ convinced Jericho to do it again here tonight. This is almost guaranteed to be one of the better matches on the card.

Jericho talks about how you’re only as good as your last match, which he promises to prove to AJ tonight.

AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho

Feeling out process to start and AJ has to fight out of an early Walls attempt. Jericho has to do the same to avoid the Calf Crusher, which starts the dueling chants. AJ drops a knee for two and it’s time to slug it out. A top rope ax handle drops AJ, who pops right back up with a dropkick. The chants start up again as the fans are definitely more into this than anything else all night.

They head outside with Jericho sending him hard into the barricade before slapping on a chinlock. JBL compares AJ coming over here to Kobashi or Hansen coming over from Japan in their primes. AJ fights up and sends Jericho to the floor, only to dive into a dropkick to the chest. Another chinlock doesn’t get Chris very far as AJ fights back and hits a running forearm to a seated Jericho.

They mess up the moonsault into the reverse DDT (to be fair that’s a really hard move to pull off) and Jericho scores with the enziguri for two. A Tesshocker (belly to back suplex into a faceplant) gets two more for AJ, only to have Jericho come back with a bulldog and Lionsault for another near fall. AJ comes back and tries the springboard forearm but Jericho springboards into the dropkick to break it up. The Pele stuns Jericho on the top and AJ loads up a super hurricanrana which is countered into the Walls.

AJ gets the break so Jericho throws him outside and puts him in the Walls on the floor. A Codebreaker brings AJ back in but he’s way too close to the ropes. AJ’s striking sequence is countered into a tiger bomb which is countered into the Styles Clash for a very close near fall. Now it’s back to the Calf Crusher and Jericho finally taps at 16:28.

Rating: B. Were you expecting anything else here? They’ve had good matches the previous two times and this worked as well, though I liked their Smackdown match a little bit better. Jericho tapping clean in the middle of the ring is the right ending because you can quickly build him up for whatever you want him to do at Wrestlemania while AJ can move on to a feud he might actually lose.

Post match Jericho does the false heel turn into the handshake.

Kickoff recap.

We look back at New Day dancing a lot on Smackdown.

It’s time for the Cutting Edge Peep Show (as hosted by Edge and Christian of course) with special guests the New Day. Edge plugs their new show (Christian: “Watch it. It’s awesome.”) but asks if we can be serious for a minute (Edge: “Lance Storm just got real mad.”) because it’s really nice to be here. This is where the first tag team ladder match took place and it’s where they received their very first standing ovation…..and here’s New Day.

They immediately ask who (WHO WHO WHO) cares about what Edge and Christian did back in the day. It’s time to be out with the old and in with the new, the New Day that is of course. Christian wants to talk about New Day’s history, which started with the power of positivity, which was brutal and lead to indifference. Edge: “I’ve never seen so much chocolate act so vanilla.” Then something happened even faster than Kofi dropped his fake Jamaican accent. Edge: “It’s like if we had a threesome with his Beyonce, you would be our love child.”

New Day is accused of ripping on local sports teams before doing just that. There’s nothing wrong with an old classic. Kofi doesn’t like the idea that New Day is called Edge and Christian ripoffs before going into a rant about how lame the current tag team division really is. Apparently the League of Nations doesn’t think much of New Day (and apparently WWE doesn’t think much of the League as they can’t get onto a show with six matches). Woods says New Day has already cooked the deal and now the League of Nations is hot garbage. Edge: “I’m starting to like you guys.”

This brings out the League with Sheamus agreeing that New Day does look stupid. Woods says they can’t get into a battle of fisticuffs because it’s a day of rest and they’re leaving. Edge: “But King Barrett hasn’t gotten to stare at anyone menacingly yet!” Del Rio brings up making Edge retire five years ago, though Edge thinks he’s accomplished more than Alberto in those five years. The Canadians leave and it’s time for New Day to dance in the aisle as Edge and Christian do one more plug. There were some funny lines here but this was even more filler on a show full of it already.

Here are the Social Outcasts with something to say. Bo gives us some safety tips on the Road to Wrestlemania before Rose calls the team a group of beautiful Priuses. Bo: “Can I be a Volvo? They have great safety ratings.” They go on for a bit until it’s time for an impromptu match.

R-Truth vs. Curtis Axel

Axel grabs a headlock to start but it’s time for Truth to dance and gyrate. Curtis gets in a shot and we get a victory lap, only to have Goldust come out to support Truth. Goldust trips Axel but then throws Rose inside for no logical reason, allowing Axel to grab a rollup for the pin at 2:15.

Post match Truth walks away again, as he should after that stupid move.

We recap the main event, which was made basically on a whim by Stephanie, which really doesn’t leave HHH with an easy match for Wrestlemania. They’ve teased some issues between Reigns and Ambrose and both guys want to fight Lesnar again. Lesnar has stared at HHH, at least when the champion had the time to appear on a show with the belt.

Roman Reigns vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar

Winner gets the title shot at Wrestlemania so we get some Big Match Intros. Brock drives Ambrose into the corner before throwing Reigns with the first suplex. A second German suplex sends Reigns flying but Dean comes back in with a missile dropkick to stagger Brock. Dean tries a German suplex on Brock but gets a hard glare and a belly to belly for his efforts.

Ambrose gets dropped on his head and it’s back to Suplex City for Reigns. The fourth German sets up an F5 with Ambrose making the save. Lesnar chuckles at Dean, who slaps Brock in the face. That earns Dean a series of knees to the ribs and a German of his own. The fans, who seem to like Ambrose, want to see more suplexes. The F5 is broken up by a spear to give Reigns two but he Superman Punches Brock to the floor. Reigns dives into an F5, only to have Dean hit Lesnar low to make the save.

A DoubleBomb through the table (good looking one too) puts Brock through the table, leaving Reigns and Ambrose to have a fight for the title shot. Dean’s bulldog gets two and we get the BOO/YAY slugout. The Rebound Lariat drops Reigns and Brock is almost to his feet. He feels like a boss in a video game at this point. Reigns and Ambrose are smart enough to go after Brock and drive him into the barricade to keep him in trouble.

That means it’s time for a second table and a second DoubleBomb. This time they bury Brock underneath the pieces of the table but Reigns punches Dean in the jaw, drawing even more booing. Back in and Dean dives into a Superman Punch but the spear is blocked with a knee. Dirty Deeds gets a very close two and Dean POINTS TO THE SIGN.

Another Dirty Deeds is countered as Reigns lifts Dean to his shoulders…..and Brock comes back in to German suplex both of them at the same time. Brock is spent though and Reigns nails a spear, only to get caught in the Kimura. Dean finally comes in with a series of chair shots to Brock’s back, followed by some more to Reigns. Roman pops up with a spear to Ambrose for the pin and the title shot at 16:47.

Rating: B. Where’s the last five minutes of this? They were starting in on something with the chair and then Reigns just speared Dean for the win. Brock was treated better here and looked like a star but I’m still mostly over the German suplexes. At least the Wyatts didn’t interfere, which is pretty much what most people (certainly myself included) figured would happen. Good match but the ending was really sudden.

Reigns gets a lot of pyro until HHH comes out for the staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The show had good action and the wrestling was much better than I was expecting but sweet goodness it felt long. So much of this stuff felt like it was being packed in because they NEEDED a pay per view this month. If nothing else, hopefully this teaches WWE (HA!) that airing matches over and over on TV before the pay per view isn’t a good booking method. Watchable show and even good at times but I’m never going to want to watch this again.

Results

Becky Lynch/Sasha Banks b. Naomi/Tamina – Bank Statement to Tamina

Kevin Owens b. Dolph Ziggler – Pop Up Powerbomb

Ryback/Big Show/Kane b. Wyatt Family – Shell Shock to Harper

Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Figure Eight

AJ Styles b. Chris Jericho – Calf Crusher

Roman Reigns b. Brock Lesnar and Dean Ambrose – Spear to Ambrose

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