Lucha Underground
Date: January 4, 2017
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Matt Striker, Vampiro

We’re back to the promotion where Cage has a glove that gives him superpowers. Now, I don’t know about you but to me, that sounds FREAKING AWESOME. This show is starting to reach the point where they can do all kinds of things with the stories they have going on but the question is whether or not they can actually capitalize on those stories. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at the Battle of the Bulls, the Rabbit Tribe and Sexy Star vs. Mariposa (in theory Mariposa at least, or whoever is sending the spiders to Star).

Mil Muertes wants to know how Prince Puma is alive and Catrina blames Vampiro.

Catrina runs into Jeremiah Crane, who says he beat the man she loves (Mil) last week. She says that’s not who she loves and disappears.

Sexy Star vs. Mariposa

They waste no time and slug it out to start with Star getting the better of it and scoring with a hurricanrana to send Mariposa outside. That doesn’t go well for Star as Mariposa sends her into various hard objects, including the front of the announcers’ table. The fans are split here but switch to a holy excrement chant as Star goes into the table ten times.

Back in and the Butterfly Effect is broken up, followed by a sitout hiptoss of all things for two on Mariposa. A Samoan drop sets up a modified Indian Deathlock on Star with Mariposa kicking her in the head for a bonus. They head up top for a superplex, only to have Mariposa get shoved off, setting up a top rope double stomp to give Star the pin at 6:49.

Rating: C+. This is a match where I wanted to see more of it, which I can’t remember happening with Sexy Star. She’s much more interesting fighting people her size than someone who allows Striker to do that really, REALLY annoying “she’s just an underdog who won’t stop fighting” schtick. I liked that they just went with the violence here instead of trying to do a wrestling match, which doesn’t fit this setup.

Post match Marty Martinez comes out and chokeslams Mariposa. Striker: “WTF!” As in he says the letters.

The White Rabbit Tribe comes up to Mascarita Sagrada to tell him he’s their inspiration and god. Sagrada says no and calls them nuts.

Rabbit Tribe vs. Kobra Moon/Pindar/Vibora

The fans call Pindar Luchasaurus and Moon has Drago on a leash. Mala Suerte and Pindar get things going and it’s off to Saltador for a right hand to the jaw. Apparently Drago will be taking Moon’s place as I’m still not sure what’s going on with this story, nor do I care. Drago gets taken into the corner for some triple teaming from the Rabbits. That goes nowhere though as it’s off to Vibora, who easily cleans house and brings Pindar back in for a forearm to Paul London’s head. Everything breaks down and Drago gets to clean house though London scores with some superkicks on Vibora. That earns him a tombstone though and Drago adds a running boot to the face for the pin at 7:29.

Post match Drago is chained again, which seems to hypnotize him. Aerostar and Fenix come in for the save as Drago is released but he doesn’t seem to recognize them. They’re able to keep him from leaving with the villains.

Sexy Star comes in to see Mack who wants to win the title by himself tonight. Star is cool with that.

Dario comes in to see Mack and says tonight isn’t going to be for the title. Instead the winner gets to pick the stipulation for the title match down the line. Dang it I can’t stand that kind of booking.

The Mack vs. Johnny Mundo

Non-title because Lucha Underground is changing the way they’re booking. Feeling out process to start with Mack actually taking him down in a nice amateur move, only to be kicked low for his efforts. An enziguri staggers Mack and Johnny flips him off, earning himself a suplex on the floor.

The champ’s crawl under the ring allows him to knee Mack in the head against the barricade for a sick sounding crash. Mack actually comes back with a slam and People’s Elbow of all things for two. A nipup into a standing moonsault is good for another near fall on Mundo and an Alpha Bomb (slam into a powerbomb) draws in the Worldwide Underground. As you might expect, Mundo hits a low blow for the pin at 8:43.

Rating: C. I liked what we had going here but there’s only so much you can do without much time and in a match that really doesn’t matter too much. Mack continues to be very deceiving as he looks like someone very overweight but winds up being someone who can do moves far beyond what you would expect. Also, the heel wins here? You couldn’t just have Mack win via countout or DQ or something?

Mundo calls him fat and makes the match All Night Long.

Mil Muertes comes out and jumps Vampiro for saving Puma. Cue Puma for the save but Vampiro calls him off and takes the Flatliner to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was one of those shows designed to set stuff up for the future, which is fine for a placeholder and in Lucha Underground’s place, I can actually believe that it’s going to pay off down the line. Muertes vs. Dark Puma could be interesting and I’d like to see where it goes, though the Vampiro bit scares me somewhat. This wasn’t a great show but maybe it can lead somewhere great, which is a good sign.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Lucha Underground
Date: January 11, 2017
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

We’re in a weird place at the moment in Lucha Underground as things are taking forever to get anywhere, though at the same time CAGE HAS FREAKING SUPERPOWERS. It’s hard to say where these shows are going to go from week to week but that can make things that much more interesting. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Dragon Azteca Jr. wanting to go after Matanza, Cortez Castro coming back to the Temple under a mask, Texano getting mad at Famous B. and Johnny Mundo picking All Night Long for his match with the Mack.

Councilman Delgado is in Dario Cueto’s office to talk about Cage with the gauntlet. Dragon Azteca comes in and wants a death match with Matanza, which is granted for tonight.

Vampiro says he’s coming for Mil Muertes at some point in the future.

Texano vs. Joey Ryan

Joey puts the lollipop in his trunks and Texano isn’t sure what to think. To be fair neither am I. A shoulder and slingshot hilo get two on Joey and it’s time to head outside because almost every match is a brawl around here. The lollipop comes back out and ignore the small, curly hair stuck on it. Back in and a kick to the ribs sets up a chinlock on Texano as this is less one sided than you would expect.

Cue Famous B. and Brenda in cowboy gear to recruit Texano. A middle rope leg lariat gets two on Joey but he grabs a t-bone suplex. Joey’s superkick gets two and Texano looks shocked (and rightfully so). With Famous B. distracting Joey, Brenda slips Texano a horseshoe to knock Joey out for the pin at 7:04.

Rating: D+. Seriously? Texano now needs Famous B. to beat Joey Ryan? The guy who rubs oil on his chest is now a match for someone as good as Texano? I’m hoping Texano doesn’t turn heel and become another Famous B. lackey as he’s hardly the most interesting heel in the world.

Texano shoves B. down and high fives fans as he leaves.

Here’s Mundo for a chat but the fans shout him down in Spanish. You can call him whatever you want because you also have to call him champion. He came here when this place was an upstart and beat everyone put in front of him. The Worldwide Underground believed in him though and that brings him to Mack. After some standard big guy jokes, Johnny says Mack can’t last all night long. Cue Mack for the fight and he actually beats up the entire team to stand tall. Mack says the title will be his.

Cage vs. Veneno

That seems to be Castro under his mask. Veneno is wearing a spider style mask and Vampiro says the name means poison. A few kicks have Cage in trouble until a Screwdriver crushes Veneno for the pin at 1:23.

Cage leaves and Sexy Star comes out to yell at Veneno, likely due to the spider mask.

Prince Puma is hearing Vampiro’s voices in his head when Catrina comes in to say it’s not the same after you die. All Puma can see is blood and pain but it’s Mil’s. Catrina sees the same, but it’s Puma’s.

Matanza vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

Death match. Dragon fires off kicks to start as Vampiro goes on about bloody baseball bats. Matanza slugs him down though and throws in the first chair, which is of course pelted at Matanza’s head. The monster is knocked to the floor for a dive but he throws Dragon into the wall to take right back over. Dragon is carried up to the balcony but he grabs part of the ceiling and flips onto Matanza. In one heck of a scary looking spot, Dragon hurricanranas him down the steps (like TWO of them) but a chokeslam OFF THE BALCONY AND THROUGH A BIG BUNCH OF WOOD is good for an immediate stoppage at 6:34.

Rating: C+. That seems like a way to write Dragon off and while I’m not sure why they needed to do that, at least the match was fun while it lasted. You need to have Matanza be a monster for a bit and this is as good a way as anything else. Massacring jobbers is only going to get you so far and Matanza is WAY past that point already.

Rey Mysteiro comes back to go after Matanza and knocks him through Dario’s roof. Dario tells everyone to get out.

After the credits, Marty Martinez stalks Melissa Santos but Mariposa kidnaps him. She thinks he might be learning something but a slap to the face just makes him laugh.

Overall Rating: C+. This was an interesting enough show though as is often the case, it seems to be a way to set up for things later on instead of doing things that actually matter at the moment. It’s not a bad show but this forty week season is going on WAY too long and is really dragging the show down in the process.

Apparently this is a mid-season finale and the show will be back in the summer. That’s a very, very long time off and that’s not good.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Ring of Honor
Date: January 11, 2017
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Nigel McGuinness

We’re back to the regular schedule this week and that means the Decade of Excellence tournament continues. The winner gets a World Title shot at the 15^th Anniversary Show against new World Champion Adam Cole, who won the title for an unprecedented third time at Wrestle Kingdom 11. Let’s get to it.

We open with clips of Christopher Daniels defeating Mark Briscoe in the first tournament match.

Daniels talks about being around for the start of Ring of Honor. He’s been around for fifteen years because there is no expiration date on destiny. I’ve never been a big Daniels fan but I could really go for him winning the tournament and the title. He’s earned it with some excellent promos recently and it would be cool to see.

Opening sequence.

Decade of Excellence Tournament First Round: Jay Briscoe vs. BJ Whitmer

Unfortunately this means we get to hear about Kevin Sullivan, who is still at ringside. Whitmer pokes Jay in the eyes to start and chops him in the back of the head a few times. Jay’s running clothesline in the corner rocks Whitmer but they head outside where Punishment Martinez offers a distraction so BJ can take over.

Back from a break as I continue to loathe all things associated with this Sullivan story, save for Martinez of course. Whitmer runs into an elbow and it’s time for some snap punches. A suicide dive takes Whitmer into the barricade but Jay might have banged up his elbow. Whitmer seems to be enjoying the pain so Jay punches him a few more times, only to get caught in an exploder suplex for two. It’s time for the spike but Mark Briscoe comes out for the save, allowing the Jay Driller to score the pin at 9:57.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and the lack of Sullivan doing anything of note helped a lot. Briscoe advancing is a big deal as he’s still one of the top stars in the company and can be turned into a big dragon (albeit a friendly one) for someone to vanquish. It’s not bad and the right winner helped a lot.

Whitmer says everything ends with a sacrifice next week.

Silas Young/Beer City Bruiser vs. Alex Reynolds/Jon Silver

Silver actually suplexes Young for two to start until the massive Bruiser comes in with a clothesline to knock Reynolds into a German suplex for two. Bruiser adds a cannonball for two more on Alex but he avoids a charge and rolls over for the tag off to Silver. The much smaller Jon manages a suplex on the Bruiser in an impressive display of strength. A Codebreaker into a German suplex gets two on Young but he kicks Silver in the head. Bruiser adds a Banzai Drop and Young gets the pin at 4:50.

Rating: C. This was better than it had any right to be and that’s always a nice surprise. Silver and Reynolds are on a long list of names of smaller guys who don’t have much of a look but can put on an energetic enough match to get by. They need some more polishing (ok a LOT more polishing) but at least it was a good first performance.

Post match Young says he and Bruiser want another partner to go after the Six Man Tag Team Titles (oh yeah those exist). They call out Bull James and then beat him up for not being the guy. Ok then.

Kingdom vs. Cheeseburger/Will Ferrara/Joey Daddiego

Non-title. The Kingdom jumps them to start with Marseglia beating up all three at once until Daddiego gets in a fall away slam to put the champs on the floor. Back from a break with Ferrara getting stomped in the corner as the Kingdom continues to be difficult to tell apart because no one bothered to tell us anything about them.

O’Ryan spears Taven by mistake and the hot tag brings in Cheeseburger. Everything breaks down and the Kingdom starts firing off kicks, only to be taken down by the palm strikes. There are a bit too many members of the Kingdom though and a kick drops Cheeseburger so Taven can frog splash him for the pin at 7:53.

Rating: D+. Here’s the problem: Kelly said the Kingdom rules the six man division and I guess that’s true, assuming you can name more than three or four six man teams. There’s just NO need for these titles and it’s becoming more and more clear every single time they’re brought up. The Kingdom is fine enough but that doesn’t mean they’re in need of titles.

We look at Matt Hardy promising to come after the Young Bucks. I still love the fact that, at least so far, TNA doesn’t seem to be gaining anything at all from this match.

Here are the Young Bucks with something to say. Matt can barely talk because he’s been screaming for joy over their new contracts. They’re not spot monkeys and they won’t be deleted. The lights go out and a drone (not Vanguard I) flies in, earning itself a superkick.

Decade of Excellence Tournament First Round: Colt Cabana vs. Chris Sabin

Alex Shelley is on commentary. They fight over a wristlock to start until Chris kicks him in the chest and gets two off a high crossbody. What looked like a thumb to the eye allows Colt to send him outside and we go to a break. Back with Colt putting on a one armed camel clutch but missing a middle rope splash. Instead Chris gets in a missile dropkick to send him outside, setting up a running kick to the chest. Back in and Cabana scores off a hip attack but here are the Boys to fan Cabana a bit. The distraction lets Chris get a small package for the pin at 8:14.

Rating: C-. This was fine again though I’m not wild on Sabin, who was hardly beaten down, using a very heel style rollup to win a match. Neither guy seems to have even the slightest chance of winning the thing, which hopefully is being loaded up for a Daniels win, though Jay Lethal is also a possibility.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t the worst show in the world but it’s much more about setting up things for the future instead of being a major show this week. There weren’t a lot of big names involved this week and, save for a longer squash, most of it didn’t do anything for me. It’s still fine but that’s not really noteworthy.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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WWE UK Tournament
Date: January 15, 2017
Location: Empress Ballroom, Blackpool, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Nigel McGuinness

We’re back with the second and final day of the tournament where we’re see the first champion crowned. The first day was more fun than I was expecting with some good action and a few personalities getting to stand out. I’m not sure who is getting the title but that makes it a lot more fun. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last night’s show. Seems appropriate.

Recap of Pete Dunne attacking Sam Gradwell along with their first round matches.

The second round has twenty minute time limits.

Quarterfinals: Pete Dunne vs. Sam Gradwell

Gradwell, with tape on his back after the attack from yesterday, goes right after him to start and clotheslines Dunne to the floor. That means a big suicide dive and Dunne is sprawled all over the place. A butterfly suplex on the ramp has Pete in more trouble as the story from last night has already done this match a lot of good. A missile dropkick drops Dunne but hurts Sam’s back as well.

The back is fine enough for a Michinoku Driver for two on Dunne as this is one sided so far. Pete rolls outside and takes a crossbody with the fans getting WAY into Gradwell. Back in and Dunne shoves him off the ropes for a big crash onto the apron, messing up the back all over again. Gradwell dives back in to beat the count but gets slammed into the corner to give Pete the pin at 4:50.

Rating: B-. This was all about the storytelling which is the most important thing you can get around here. The story with the back injury made things interesting and Pete came off as the real villain of the whole thing, which is a perfect role for him. I bought the idea that he wanted to win no matter what the cost and that gives him a character going forward.

Dunne says he was making a name for himself last night and that’s not controversial.

We look at Joseph Conners and Mark Andrews’ first round matches.

Quarterfinals: Joseph Conners vs. Mark Andrews

Andrews starts with some very fast rollups for two each but Conners elbows him in the face to cut off the offense. Joseph tries his own sunset flip, only to have Mark roll through and dropkick him down for two more. That sends Joseph outside but he avoids a moonsault off the apron and drop toeholds Andrews into the steps.

The fans are entirely behind Andrews and an enziguri staggers Joseph enough to give Mark a breather. Andrews sends him into the steps to even things up and there’s a cannonball off the barricade for good measure. Back in and Andrews’ standing moonsault hits knees and a slingshot Downward Spiral (cool) gives Conners two. Joseph takes too long putting Andrews on top though and a super hurricanrana brings him down. The Stunner out of a suplex (Stundog Millionaire) knocks Conners silly and the shooting star sends Andrews to the final four at 8:14.

Rating: C+. As much as I didn’t like Andrews in TNA, it’s rather amazing to see how much more interesting he is when he doesn’t have TNA holding him down. I mean, he’s not great or anything but he’s perfectly watchable, which is a HUGE improvement over being one of the least interesting guys I’ve seen in such a long time.

Wolfgang and Trent Seven first round recaps. Cole mistakenly says Seven beat Roy Johnson in the first round.

Fit Finlay is here.

Quarterfinals: Wolfgang vs. Trent Seven

They start slow for a change until Seven slaps him in the face. That earns him a suplex and they head outside to start the brawl. A moonsault off the barricade crushes Seven but Wolfgang bangs up his knee. A suicide dive drops Wolfgang again but he comes right back with a superplex to put both guys down.

The Seven Star Lariat is countered into Wasteland, only to have Wolfgang miss the moonsault. Another Seven Star actually connects for just two so Seven actually tries a super piledriver. Since there’s no way that’s happening, Wolfgang headbutts him down and hits the Howling (Swanton Bomb) for the pin and the big upset at 6:43.

Rating: C+. This was a better performance from Wolfgang than last night and I’m really surprised at the upset as Seven looked like a threat to win the whole thing. It’s a good match though the surprise that Seven went out that fast is pretty jarring. At least we had a surprise though and that’s a good thing.

Jordan (not George as Cole puts it) Devlin and Tyler Bate first round recaps.

Quarterfinals: Jordan Devlin vs. Tyler Bate

Bate tweaks his mustache instead of shaking hands, earning himself a forearm to the back of the head to start us off. That doesn’t last long as Devlin is knocked to the floor for a suicide dive, only to have Devlin start in on the arms. A monkey flip gets Bate out of trouble and a middle rope elbow to the jaw gets two. Devlin actually hits Bate in the face with the rope, only to miss a moonsault. The Tyler Driver 97 is countered with a hurricanrana but the second attempt sends Bate to the semifinals at 6:06.

Rating: C. Bate is very up and down but the time issues are causing problems on this show. There’s only so much that can be done in a six minute match, especially with people we have less than ten minutes of time with in the first place. Devlin going out this early is a surprise but at least the fans are responding to Bate and he has a great finisher.

I love the little wave that Bate does.

Here are the updated brackets:

Pete Dunne

Mark Andrews

Wolfgang

Tyler Bate

Video on the final four and how they want to win.

Robbie Brookside is here.

Semifinals: Pete Dunne vs. Mark Andrews

Dunne takes him straight to the mat and grabs a chinlock but a spinning armdrag sends Pete to the floor. That of course means a big flip dive as Andrews has shown me more in the last two matches than in his entire TNA run. As usual, I blame TNA. Pete bends the fingers back and goes for the stomp on the steps but Andrews snaps off a hurricanrana to take over again.

A standing 450 moonsault (GEEZ) gets two on Dunne and a springboard hurricanrana sends him outside again. Didn’t we just see this? Andrews’ latest dive is caught and dropped onto the apron, followed by a release suplex (the X Plex) onto the ramp. That’s still not enough to get a countout so Dunne stomps away on the head. Back in and yet another X Plex is countered into the Stundog Millionaire (that name is rapidly losing its charm).

Dunne has a counter of his own though as the shooting star is reversed into a rollup for a very close two. The pumphandle Downward Spiral (Bitter End) is broken up and the fifth or so X Plex is countered into the fourth or so hurricanrana for two. Another shooting star misses and ANOTHER FREAKING X PLEX sets up the Bitter End to send Dunne on at 10:45.

Rating: B-. This match is going to get high praise and I get why but DANG I was getting tired of that stupid X Plex in the second half of the match. I don’t like it when Lesnar does the same suplex over and over and Dunne is the same way. It’s still entertaining enough but this is going to be praised to death for one of the things that gets on my nerves more than anything else.

Cole and McGuinness talk about their media coverage over the last few days.

Semifinals: Wolfgang vs. Tyler Bate

They talk trash for the first minute plus until Bate is driven into the corner. That earns Wolfgang some hard shots to what might be a broken nose. Bate is too small to pick him up though and Wolfgang takes him down again. The middle rope moonsault misses again and Bate kicks him in the nose. You don’t kick a guy named Wolfgang in the face so he grabs a gorilla press into a powerslam (which the announcers say is like a Pop Up Powerbomb). The Howling is WAY off though and the Tyler Driver 97 ends Wolfgang at 6:00.

Rating: D+. Maybe it’s just overkill but I’m having some issues caring for either of these guys. Bate is small and young enough to make for an interesting character in this big underdog run and that’s all you can do with some of these characters. Bate vs. Dunne is a solid little story and I’m sure the match will be good. Watchable match here but the clock issues keep hurting things.

Wolfgang shakes hands post match and leaves, allowing Dunne to come out here and send Bate shoulder first into the post. Regal comes out to chase him off with Dunne PANICKING. At least there’s something for the finals.

Nigel, a good commentator, tells us that Dunne uses an arm hold. Above all else, that felt natural instead of like they were hammering it over our heads. Simple, yet effective.

Medics check on Bate who finally sits up. The shocked look on his face is a nice touch.

Here’s Neville for a match but first he’s got something to say. Neville gets a HUGE ovation but he talks about being forgotten by everyone, including the UK fans here in this tournament. Of course he wasn’t allowed to enter because otherwise it wouldn’t have been a contest. There isn’t a man in this kingdom or on this continent that deserves to be across the ring from him and of course that means theme music.

Neville vs. Tommy End

Feeling out process to start as we hear about End being trained by Kassius Ohno, who has been re-signed in the last few weeks. End snapmares him down and sits on the mat for an awkward staredown. Neville is sent outside for more strike exchanges with End coming out on the bad side for a change. We hit a chinlock back inside (it would be odd to do it outside) as we hear a voiceover talking about….there being no updates on Bate’s condition.

The running kick to the side of End’s head gets two but Neville dives into a kick to his own head. End gets in even more strikes and sends him outside for a middle rope moonsault. Cole: “Who says Tommy End can’t fly?” Uh, no one so far Cole. A spinning kick to the head (following a good fake) sets up a German suplex for two on Neville. End loads up something on the top but gets hurricanranaed back down, setting up the Red Arrow for the pin at 8:39.

Rating: C. Not bad here and Neville winning was the only possible outcome given that he has a pay per view title shot coming up. End was fine and I’m sure NXT will do a better job of building him up than a special like this. It’s a perfectly fine match and I’m digging heel Neville more and more every single week.

Bate has a separated AC joint but he’s fighting anyway.

Here’s Finn Balor (rocking the heck out of a suit) for a chat before the main event. Balor puts the tournament over and the fans decide that they deserve it. It’s time for the finals.

Well, it will be after we look at how both guys got to the title match.

UK Title: Pete Dunne vs. Tyler Bate

William Regal is in the ring with the belt and Bate is coming in with a very bad shoulder. A lockup doesn’t go anywhere to start so Dunne slaps him in the face, earning an ANGRY 19 year old stare. Bate’s wristlock doesn’t go anywhere so Dunne goes to the first armbar. Bate comes back with a dropkick to stagger Dunne and there go the fans with their chanting all over again.

It’s off to an ankle twist to slow Dunne down as Cole starts reading Tweets. They head outside with Tyler flat out winning a slugout, which is rather surprising. Back in again and Pete finally kicks him in the arm, only to get sent into the post for his efforts. A quick exploder sends Dunne flying but the shoulder is too gone for the Tyler Driver. The airplane spin (with three different rotations) gives Bate two but he gets caught in a triangle choke.

That doesn’t work either so Bate knocks him to the floor for a Fosbury Flop of all things. A 450 lands in a stomp (not clear if that was intentional) but Dunne kicks out again. The Bitter End is only good for two and the fans are WAY into this, as they should be. It’s off to the double wristlock (Kimura) with Dunne wrapped around Tyler’s body but Bate muscles him up into a brainbuster. They slug it out again and Tyler kicks him in the head, setting up the Tyler Driver for the pin and the title at 15:12.

Rating: A-. That might be a bit high but I got WAY more into this than I was expecting to. Bate winning is a nice choice and having him beat Dunne was as good of a story as they were going to be able to pull off. This was a much better match than I was expecting and this is the kind of match the tournament was needing to make it memorable. Great main event and Bate looked like a star despite his age.

HHH, Finlay, Regal and Balor present Bate with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this one a lot more than the previous night and it’s a good way to wrap the thing up. Given that the title isn’t likely to mean much in WWE, this was perfect for a two day event that really doesn’t mean much in the big picture. It leaves a door open for WWE in the UK and that’s really all they wanted so it’s hard to complain. I liked the matches well enough and some people made their names so it’s definitely a success.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2003
Date: January 19, 2003
Location: Fleet Center, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 15,338
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

To say a lot has changed in the last year is a huge understatement. We have the Brand Split now and there are two world titles. That brings us to the part of this show that is most remembered: the world title matches. We have HHH defending the Raw Title in one of the worst matches ever, followed by Angle defending the Smackdown Title in one of the best matches ever. Also Brock Lesnar is here and has taken Smackdown by storm. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about what you would expect it to be: thirty men wanting to go to Wrestlemania.

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

The loser is out of the Rumble. Big Show has Heyman with him, which I’m sure makes him the best wrestler EVER right? Show won the title from Lesnar at Survivor Series after Heyman turned on Brock in one of those matches where they were backed into a corner out of their own stupidity. Show shoves him around to start so Brock snaps off a belly to belly suplex to fire up the crowd.

There’s a second suplex and Show is in trouble early. Lesnar loads up a third but Show grabs him by the throat and shoves him to the floor. Show throws Lesnar around the ring which looks awesome when you consider Brock is a massive dude. Lesnar avoids a charge in the corner and hits a release German suplex for two.

A big boot slows Brock down and a side slam looks to set up the chokeslam. Brock kind of rolls through it into a two count, followed by another belly to belly. Heyman gets dragged in but Show saves him from an F5. The chokeslam gets two as Heyman is losing his mind. Show gets rammed into Heyman and the F5 sends Brock to the Rumble.

Rating: C+. As intricate as modern wrestling has become, there’s something to be said about having two big guys get out there and throw each other around for five minutes. The power displays here made the fans gasp which is the right idea. At the end of the day, wrestling is a spectacle and having larger than life characters doing larger than life things is a surefire idea. This wasn’t so much good as it was fun, which is the right choice for an opener.

Jericho says he’ll win the Rumble.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. William Regal/Lance Storm

Regal and Storm are defending and Regal is STILL doing the brass knuckles thing. Storm and Ray get things going with Lance working on the arm, only to get powered down with ease. Bubba hits one of his LOUD chops in the corner and takes Storm down with a kind of chokebomb. In something I’ve never seen him do otherwise, Bubba hooks a standing Figure Four. Actually I can’t think of anyone who has ever used that.

Off to D-Von for a dropkick (what’s gotten into the Dudleys tonight?) and here’s Regal to get slammed down immediately. The champs double team D-Von down and we get into the standard tag team formula. Storm takes D-Von to the mat and it’s off to Regal for a front facelock. Lance comes back in with a cravate into a sleeper as this continues to meander along.

D-Von rolls Storm away and makes the tag to Bubba who speeds things up. The guy has emotion if nothing else. A big running splash in the corner crushes both champions and a side slam gets two on Storm. The American hits a German on the Canadian for two, followed by a spear to the Englishman. The Bubba Bomb gets two on Lance and Regal takes What’s Up. A double flapjack (stupid fans: “3D!”) gets two on Storm and here’s Chief of Staff Sean Morely. Regal finds the brass knuckles but walks into the 3D. D-Von hits Storm with the knuckles for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This didn’t work for me. It felt like a Raw match that was trying to be a PPV match but never got near the hump they were trying to get over. The ending was stupid on top of that, as they had Regal beaten with the 3D, so why use the knuckles? Also it didn’t help that Bubba single handedly beat up the tag champions for about two minutes straight. Bad match.

Lawler on that match: “I’m as confused as a baby in a topless bar.” What is WITH the announcers and their similies/metaphors in this company?

Nathan Jones is coming. Oh geez.

We recap the Torrie vs. Dawn feud. This is one of those stories where you look at it in awe and wonder what they were thinking. Dawn Marie (a gorgeous Diva) fell in love with and married Torrie’s fifty something year old dad Al Wilson, then screwed him to death (literally) on their honeymoon. There was some lesbianism (as in kissing on screen and unfilmed other stuff) involved which was there to tease the audience and wasn’t bad at all. This is supposed to be a stepmother vs. stepdaughter match. Again, I have no idea what this was supposed to accomplish.

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

Dawn comes to the ring in a veil because she’s in mourning. Torrie gets blasted in the face to start before spearing Dawn down and things get sloppy. Marie tries an armbar because we need some wrestling in this I guess. Torrie gets beaten on for a bit until they collide and hit the mat. Dawn hits a springboard spinning clothesline for no cover, giving us the highlight of the match. Torrie hits a neckbreaker out of nowhere for the win.

Rating: D-. Anything with these two in those outfits can’t be considered a failure, but at the end of the day, there is no real defending this match in the slightest. It was HORRIBLE and the story was borderline insulting to my intelligence, but the girls looked good and I guess that was the whole point. Why not just have a regular match if you want to is beyond me, but it’s 2003 so what do you expect?

Stephanie seems to hit on some young guy in the back when Eric comes up to trade some weak trash talk. They’re both GM’s at this point. Stephanie has a bombshell for Smackdown which would wind up being Hogan. They argue over money or blood being more important and nothing goes anywhere. That young guy by the way? Randy Orton.

House show ads, including one for 7pm on a Monday night.

Sean O’Haire as the Devil’s Advocate promo. Sweet goodness this could have been HUGE.

Nathan Jones is STILL coming. Seriously did we need that twice in 30 minutes?

We recap HHH vs. Scott Steiner as I begin to take deep breaths. HHH was giving a promo about how awesome he was when Steiner interrupted and demanded a title shot. This led to a series of contests like pushups and bench presses which went nowhere. Note that Steiner hadn’t actually had a match in WWE up to this point. I wonder why.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Scott Steiner

HHH has red trunks on here for some reason. He mixed them up every now and then and rarely did the other colors work. Stick with basic black Game. Hebner brings them to the middle for instructions which is ultra rare stuff. Steiner wins an early slugout and pounds on the champion in the corner. A gorilla press sends HHH to the floor and Steiner pounds away with those weird looking overhand punches of his.

Steiner suplexes him back in for two and works on the back some more. An elbow to the face puts HHH down and there’s an appropriate Boston Crab. HHH powers out of it and hits the facebuster but Steiner no sells it. There’s a bear hug which is quickly broken but Steiner snaps off an overhead belly to belly (1) for two. Flair saves HHH from being put in the Steiner Recliner and Steiner charges into a boot in the corner to finally change the momentum.

We head to the floor again where Scott goes into the steps. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled with this so far but they’ve still got time to crank it up a bit. Flair chokes away with his jacket and HHH hits his second neckbreaker in about 30 seconds for two. Since we didn’t allido it properly the first time, Flair chokes away even more. A Pedigree attempt is countered into a slingshot into the buckle. Steiner looks like he’s going through labor.

An overhead suplex (2) puts HHH down and I kid you not: Steiner FALLS DOWN due to exhaustion. He’s clearly sucking wind and HHH didn’t touch him at all. Speaking of HHH, he counters a tombstone attempt into a….I think it was supposed to be the third neckbreaker in about 90 seconds but Steiner took it wrong, causing it to look like a cutter where he fell backwards instead of forwards. That gets two and the fans are starting to boo.

HHH is loudly calling spots to try to salvage this before he hits a vertical suplex. For no apparent reason he goes up and jumps into a belly to belly (3). Steiner can barely punch so he settles for some clotheslines. There’s an overhead belly to belly (4) and an overhead belly to belly (5) and an overhead belly to belly (6). The fans are openly booing Steiner now. His response? To hold HHH’s hair while HHH rams his own head into the buckles (seriously, Steiner clearly isn’t even pushing) and to hit a spinning belly to belly (7) for two and even more booing.

Steiner tries a butterfly powerbomb and literally falls backwards as he does it, causing HHH to land on Steiner’s knees. The fans groan at the sight of this so HHH goes up top to get superplexed down. He’s handing these spots to Steiner. THANKFULLY HHH tries to walk out but Steiner won’t have it, because WE HAVE TO KEEP GOING. Steiner blasts HHH with the belt to bust him open to try to get the fans to care but the match is long past salvageable at this point.

Back in and Steiner hits ANOTHER belly to belly (8), causing the fans to get MAD. They’re not annoyed, they’re not wanting a new champion, they want Steiner to get out of their ring now. HHH tries to get counted out but Steiner goes after him AGAIN. Back in and Steiner does the pushups to tick off the fans even more as Flair is BEGGING the referee to stop the match.

Now HHH throws the referee to the floor but HEBNER WON’T STOP IT. I mean he pulls his arm up to ring the bell but stops and says keep it going. Steiner hits the NINTH belly to belly suplex (9) of the match for two so HHH hits him low and grabs a fast rollup for two. HHH finally gives up and hits Steiner with the sledgehammer for the DQ.

Rating: H. As in HHH, who I feel sorry for here. Now everyone knows I’m no fan of the guy in 2003, but he was in a HORRIBLE situation here. HHH was trying to keep this a coherent match, but Steiner was beyond worthless here, causing the match to sink to levels far below what any other main event “talent” would be capable of. After about seven minutes (out of eighteen), Steiner stopped doing anything resembling trying to have a match and was just doing suplexes.

Remember that back stuff he did at the beginning? Completely forgotten. Did you see him try his finisher? Not even once. He somehow managed a belly to belly suplex every two minutes, despite being on defense for a good third of the match. This was absolutely horrible and quite possibly the worst world title match I can EVER remember, which is covering a lot of ground.

Post match, Steiner beats up HHH and Flair with the hammer, which gets SYMPATHY from the fans. HHH is getting SYMPATHY from a crowd. Think about that for a minute. And what’s worse: THEY HAD A REMATCH! Oh and there’s the Steiner Recliner to absolutely nothing positive from the crowd at all. Bischoff has to come get Steiner off HHH.

We cut to Cole and Tazz and even MICHAEL FREAKING COLE has a look on his face as if to say “WOW that was an abomination.”

We recap Benoit vs. Angle. Angle won the title from Big Show at Armageddon thanks to Lesnar before revealing that he hired Paul Heyman to be his new manager. Heyman said anyone could get a shot other than Brock Lesnar and brought in Team Angle (Haas and Benjamin) to protect Kurt during a knee injury. Benoit won a title shot over Big Show to set this up.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Team Angle is immediately ejected to make sure it’s one on one. Benoit grabs a headlock to start before trying the Sharpshooter to send Angle to the floor. Back in and Angle goes for the ankle but gets dropkicked away. Benoit grabs a kind up reverse Figure Four but Angle grabs the rope. This is all holds/counter holds so far. Benoit gets sent shoulder first into the post followed by an Angle suplex for two.

They chop it out with Benoit taking over and hitting a reverse clothesline to take Angle down. Angle drops Benoit across the top rope but gets guillotined down by the Canadian. They head to the apron with Benoit DDTing him down onto the side of the ring. The champion has a busted nose now. Back in and the Swan Dive misses but Benoit rolls out of the Angle Slam. There’s the Sharpshooter to Angle who eventually gets to a rope. A belly to back suplex gets two for Chris but Angle snaps off an overhead belly to belly (just one so far).

Back to the floor where Benoit gets dropped onto the barricade to further mess with his head. Off to a rear naked choke back inside so Kurt can overly loudly call some spots. Angle catches Benoit in another belly to belly followed by a belly to back for two. Back to the chinlock for a bit until a double clothesline puts both guys down. Benoit rolls some Germans but so does Angle. And people wonder why their necks were held together by tape.

Benoit gets the final German but Angle runs the ropes to hit the belly to belly off the top to put both guys down. That gets two but the Angle Slam is countered into the Crossface. Angle gets the rope, so Benoit shifts to an ankle lock. Angle reverses into one of his own and now Benoit is in trouble. Benoit goes to kick off but instead grabs another Crossface. Kurt counters into a rollup but Benoit put the Crossface on the other (right) arm this time. Angle stands up and hits the Angle Slam but can’t immediately cover.

Angle takes the straps down but another German attempt is countered into a rollup for two. They trade HARD Germans until Benoit hooks a release German to put both guys down. Before anyone asks, the difference between this and the previous match with the suplexes is how hard these are. Steiner looked like he was at a dance recital but here they look like they’re trying to kill one another. Not to mention there’s OTHER STUFF in between the suplexes.

Benoit hits the longest diving headbutt you’ll EVER see, but he can’t cover because of his head getting jarred like that. Angle counters the Crossface into a reverse powerbomb onto the buckle. The Angle Slam gets a VERY close two as the crowd is losing their minds. Back to the Crossface but Angle rolls through into the ankle lock. Benoit rolls over but can’t break the hold. He kicks Kurt off but Angle goes right back to the hold. Benoit keeps trying to kick him off but Angle hooks the grapevine and Benoit has to tap.

Rating: A+. That’s your match of the year right there people. Oh wait according to Meltzer there was some match in Japan that no one but him ever saw and that has to be better than this right? Anyway, these two DESTROYED each other with some absolutely amazing counters and awesome sequences out there while suplexing the tar out of each other. This both guy’s best match ever, and that’s saying A LOT.

Benoit gets a standing ovation, showing that he was ready to be world champion. Naturally that’s why he had to wait fifteen months to get the title, because the world was BEGGING for another Steiner match, the Nash feud with HHH, and the Goldberg run of doom. Ok Goldberg I can live with but the other two? Screw that.

Van Dam and Kane say they’ll knock each other out to win the Rumble.

Royal Rumble

The intervals are two minutes if you listen to Fink and 90 seconds if you listen to JR. There are fifteen Raw guys and fifteen Smackdown guys this year which would be the norm for a few years to come. Shawn gets #1 and Jericho gets #2, but it’s Christian playing the role of Jericho at the entrance, allowing Jericho to sneak in from behind and jump Shawn. Jericho hits Shawn low and starts the beat down before getting a chair to crack Shawn open.

Chris Nowitski is #3 and he’s perfectly fine with letting Jericho maul Shawn. Jericho easily dumps Shawn, setting up their classic at Wrestlemania. Nowitski isn’t in the ring yet. Rey Mysterio (still pretty new here) is #4 as things speed up a lot. A springboard dropkick and rana take Jericho down but Nowitski gets in as well….or not as he slid back out. Rey escapes a gorilla press and dropkicks Jericho into the ropes, only to get jumped by Nowitski.

Edge is #5 for a big pop. He would have been world champion by summer if he hadn’t hurt his neck. Jericho is sent into the post and Nowitski is knocked down, allowing the two good guys to pound away on each other while both miss finishers. A springboard rana by Rey is countered into a sitout powerbomb and Christian is #6. He hugs his brother but Edge spears him down out of common sense. Nowitski tries to dump Edge and Rey but gets caught by a “double” dropkick (read as Mysterio hit him but Edge completely missed and landed on Chris after he was already down).

The Bronco Buster hits Nowitski and Chavo is #7. He immediately takes Rey down but gets caught in a 619. Rey drops the dime on Chavo and hits a 619 on Christian. He tries a springboard rana on Christian but lands on Nowitski and takes him to the floor in the process. Jericho puts Mysterio out, leaving us with Jericho, Edge, Christian and Chavo at the moment. You can add Tajiri at #8 to that list.

Christian gets the tar kicked out of him and Chavo gets put in a spinning backbreaker. Not bad for the first twenty seconds for Tajiri. Bill DeMott is #9 and no one cares. At this point, he had been a Tough Enough trainer and his gimmick was that the rookies had ticked him off so much that he was basically a sociopath. I’ve heard of worse. Tommy Dreamer is #10 and he brings some toys with him.

There are too many people in the ring at the moment. Edge gets in some kendo stick shots on DeMott for an elimination. Christian and Jericho hit Dreamer with trashcan lids in a modified Conchairto for another elimination. Tajiri elbows both guys down but tries the Tarantula on Jericho and gets dumped as a result. B2, as in Bull Buchanan as Cena’s ex-lackey, is #11. Edge knocks out Chavo as the ring is thinning out nicely.

Jericho gets sent over the top but skins the cat and pulls out Edge and Christian in the process. Jericho is busted open but he’s left all alone in the ring. RVD is #12 and man alive do the fans love him. They slug it out for a bit with Van Dam hitting a slingshot to send Jericho to the apron but not out. Matt Hardy (who strongly dislikes mustard) is #13. The heels (as in those not named RVD) double team the good guy (as in those named RVD) but Jericho is too weak to do much and Matt kind of sucks so Van Dam takes them down.

There’s a Five Star to Jericho and Eddie is #14. He pounds away on Van Dam as well and hits a Frog Splash of his own, only to walk into a Twist of Fate from Matt. Jeff Hardy is #15 and Matt tries an alliance, only to get kicked in the gut. Jeff throws Matt to the apron but Matt’s MF’er Shannon Moore prevents the elimination. There’s the Twist of Fate to Matt but Shannon covers up Matt from the Swanton. Jeff just dives on both of them and Rosey of 3 Minute Warning is #16.

Absolutely nothing of note happens here so Test with Stacy is #17. He cleans house until John Cena is #18 with a rap for us. He manages to rhyme “Explain it to ya” with Wrestlemania so I’m impressed. He spends forever rapping until Van Dam throws him inside. The ring is way too full again. After Cena is in the ring for about eight seconds, Charlie Haas is #19. Van Dam and Jeff slug it out until Jeff goes up top like an IDIOT and gets shoved out. He would burn out and leave the company in about three months anyway.

Eddie walks the buckles and hits a rana on Jericho as Rikishi is #20, giving us Jericho, Van Dam, Matt, Eddie, Rosey, Test, Cena, Haas and Rikishi. Again that’s too many people. Rosey and Rikishi square off but nothing happens. Instead they team up and beat up Matt and Shannon because they can, until Rosey clotheslines the heck out of Rikishi. Jamal of 3 Minute Warning (you know him better as Umaga) is #21.

Rikishi superkicks Jamal down almost immediately and there’s a Stinkface for him. Kane is #22 and I think we have eleven people in there at the moment. He cleans as much house as you can clean with that many people in there before FINALLY putting someone out in the form of Rosey. Jericho gets thrown to the apron but hangs on. Shelton Benjamin is #23 and Team Angle starts taking over. Booker T is #24 and we DESPERATELY need someone to clear some guys out.

Booker immediately kicks Kane down and fires up a Spinarooni to a BIG pop. Eddie gets backdropped out and Booker pounds on Rikishi. A-Train (Albert/Tensai) is #25 and the hometown boy gets to beat up a lot of people in a hurry. Shawn Michaels runs in with a bandage on his head and goes after Jericho, causing Test to dump Jericho out. See, that way it’s legal.

Maven from Tough Enough (finally with actual trunks) is #26. He goes right for Kane like an idiot and gets punched in the face for his efforts. Goldust is #27 and he barely makes it 45 seconds before Haas and Benjamin put him out. Booker goes off on Haas in the corner but gets thrown out by Team Angle as well. He would get the world title shot at HHH as a consolation prize.

Big Dave Batista is #28 and you can hear the fans react to him. The first guy he hits? John Cena. It’s always cool to see the future in there like that. Test takes him down with a full nelson slam but Batista low bridges him for the elimination. Batista takes down Rikishi with a spinebuster before clotheslining him out. At least the ring is clearing out a bit. Brock Lesnar is #29 and is the odds on favorite to win this thing.

Brock immediately eliminates Team Angle by himself before F5ing Matt on top of them. A-Train hits a bicycle kick to take Batista down as Undertaker is #30 to a big ovation. The final grouping: Van Dam, Cena, Jamal, Kane, A-Train, Maven, Batista, Lesnar and Undertaker. Drop Maven and A-Train and that’s a pretty stacked field. To the shock of no one paying attention, Taker is returning here. There’s a 9 hour DVD of matches and moments where Undertaker returns easily.

Taker punches everyone and dumps Cena and Jamal with ease. Maven dropkicks Taker in the back and celebrates, earning himself a chokeslam. The elimination is academic. A-Train hits the chokebomb on Taker to finally slow him down as Kane chokeslams Lesnar. Kane and Van Dam, the Raw tag champions, start teaming up to beat people up but A-Train takes them both down. Van Dam saves Kane from a backbreaker and the champs double clothesline Albert out.

Kane tells Van Dam to let him pick Van Dam up and drop him on Batista, but Kane turns (not heel) on Van Dam to throw RVD out. We’re down to Lesnar, Undertaker, Kane and Batista which is awesome by today’s standards. Taker and Lesnar have a showdown but the other two guys break it up. Taker pounds away on Batista in a preview of the feud of the year in 2007.

A big spinebuster puts Taker down and Lesnar fights off the two Raw (Batista/Kane) guys. There’s an F5 for Kane and NOW we get Taker vs. Brock. They slug it out and after Taker says big boot, he hits a big boot to take Brock’s head off. The F5 is escaped but there’s a tombstone for Brock. A clothesline casually puts Batista out to get us down to three. Taker teases an alliance with Kane but dumps him as well. He has to knock away an invading Batista and Brock dumps Undertaker to go to Wrestlemania.

Rating: B-. Good but definitely not great Rumble here. You could see the next generation in the blocks but the problem is they were just that: the NEXT generation. Taker was the only possible winner here other than Brock and that’s a recipe for a bad Rumble. You need more than one candidate for the Rumble and as soon as Lesnar’s music hit, it was clear who was winning this.

Taker says go win the title but he wants the first shot. Brock says ok to end the show. Did we need that?

Overall Rating: C-. The problem with this show is that the excellent match on the card is brought down by the HORRENDOUS match just before it. The Rumble is good but it isn’t good enough to save an otherwise bad card. The show isn’t terrible, but it’s a sign of things to come for this year, especially with HHH on the Raw side. Not much to see here other than Benoit vs. Angle of course. HHH vs. Steiner is only worth seeing if you want to see a trainwreck.

Ratings Comparison

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: C+

Dudley Boys vs. William Regal/Lance Storm

Original: C

Redo: D

Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie

Original: DD

Redo: D-

Scott Steiner vs. HHH

Original: G-

Redo: H (As in HHH)

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Royal Rumble

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

I’m not sure what I was thinking the first time. The show just isn’t that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/22/royal-rumble-count-up-2003-best-match-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

http://wrestlingrumors.net/wwe-legend-passes-away-mere-weeks-murder-trial/

You kind of had to know this one was coming.  I don’t know what you think about his legal issues of late but he was a huge star and there’s no other way around it.

We’ll wrap it up with probably the most subjective of all the awards: worst wrestler of the year. Now this can have a few different definitions and the nominees encompass both. In this case it could be either the worst in ring performer or the person who serves the least important purpose. It’s very rare to have one person do both but maybe that’s the case here with the worst wrestler of the year. As usual, these are in no particular order.

1. Dolph Ziggler

This is one of the most controversial of all the possible options. Depending on whom you ask, Ziggler is either the most overrated wrestler of the year or the most underutilized wrestler of the year. My issue with him is very simple: he’s not going to win the big one and there’s no reason to think he will. Ziggler has spent years on the exact same story: he’s on a roll and needs that one big win to put it all together and become a star.

We got it again this year on multiple occasions, starting with the Ambrose feud over the Smackdown World Title and then again with Miz over the Intercontinental Title. Sure Ziggler eventually won that title, but it’s not like that really means anything for him as he’s held it multiple times before. It also doesn’t help that if you’ve seen one Ziggler match, you’re pretty much seen them all. He wrestles a very repetitive style and that gets old in a hurry.

Overall, Ziggler is a case where we’ve seen all this before and it’s not interesting enough to keep seeing it. His in ring work is passable but as soon as you hear that music, you know what you’re going to get. I can’t put into words how disappointed I was when Daniel Bryan was responding to Miz’s amazing promo from “Talking Smack” and our big reveal was Ziggler coming out to fight Miz instead. We’ve seen it so many times and there’s just no reason to see it again, especially as often as it happens.

2. Braun Strowman

Remember last year when Strowman was part of the Wyatt Family and basically acting as a more muscular lackey who was otherwise interchangeable with Erick Rowan? Well now he looks like he’s primed for a World Title run on “Monday Night Raw” and one heck of a big match at “Wrestlemania XXXIII”. That’s where people have issues with Strowman and I can’t say I disagree: he’s nowhere near seasoned enough for this spot.

Strowman only debuted back in December 2014 and is already near the top of the card having matches against World Champions. His offense consists of a bunch of power moves, none of which really offer anything beyond that of someone with about two years’ experience in the business. It’s rather hard to care about someone who is constantly doing the most basic power moves and little more.

Can you remember any single good match Strowman had in 2016? He had a few watchable ones but almost all of them were built around the other people who helped carry him through. Strowman is little more than a power guy who is in WAY over his head, which doesn’t make for the most logical or interesting push in the world. He’s passable enough at what he does but that doesn’t mean he’s ready to be on this stage.

3. Eva Marie

I was hesitant to put her on the list because I’m not sure if she even qualifies as a wrestler. In theory, to be a wrestler, you need to actually wrestle somewhere and I don’t know if wrestling on the occasional house show is enough of a qualification. At the end of the day, Eva Marie was given a spot on the roster because she comes off as stupid on a reality show and looks great in a swimsuit. That might have been enough a few years back, but now things have changed a bit.

Believe it or not, in today’s wrestling world you need to be able to wrestle a match instead of just looking good on the floor. I liked the idea that they were going with in Eva Marie’s case as it was clear she couldn’t be trusted to wrestle a match on live TV so they came up with one excuse after another (If nothing else it gave us the amazing over the top entrance.). However, at some point you need to be able to do something in the ring and it really doesn’t seem to be likely with Eva Marie.

She’s been on the roster for a few years now and after all that time with some of the people she’s been working with, you would think she would have gotten a little bit better. Somehow that’s not the case though as she continues to be little more than semi-competent in the ring. Why we need to sit through her matches when there are people like Charlotte and Sasha Banks on the roster, I don’t see why she’s necessary.

4. Carmella

This is a case where there were forces working against Carmella in the first place and by that I mean the Brand Split. Much like Strowman, Carmella hasn’t been in the ring for very long and she is in desperate need of more ring time. In theory she was going to be able to get that down in NXT but with the Brand Split, she was called up to the main roster WAY earlier than necessary.

The fact that she came out to crickets most of the time didn’t offer a good sign for her future and while the heel turn helped her, she was then stuck in a feud with Nikki Bella. Compare this to Alexa Bliss, who has only been wrestling for a few months fewer than Carmella but seems a few steps ahead of her at this point. Do you think that might have anything to do with working with Becky Lynch instead of Bella?

Carmella should still be down in NXT and there’s nothing wrong with that. The idea of NXT, for some people at least, is to be able to be built up into a wrestler instead of being thrust into a role you’re not ready for yet. Longtime fans of the NXT product could have told you that she wasn’t ready to be on the big stage, especially without Enzo Amore and Big Cass. However, this is the reality she’s stuck in and while she’s FAR from a lost cause, she’s still in over her head and it’s showing badly at times.

5. Brock Lesnar

Now we’re getting somewhere and again in depends on how you like your wrestlers. Lesnar is basically the annoying kid playing a video game who finds the one move that works and keeps using it over and over again because he knows no one is going to beat him. That might be entertaining in real life but it doesn’t make for the best professional wrestling matches.

However, I get the appeal of Lesnar in this case. It doesn’t make sense for him to do anything other than what works, but that really doesn’t make for entertaining wrestling a lot of the time. Lesnar just doing suplex after suplex might make sense for his character but ENOUGH ALREADY. I remember his time right after returning when he was doing more submission work and going after the arm and all that jazz. Why can’t we get more of that version of Lesnar?

It also doesn’t help that he keeps destroying everyone (not named Goldberg) in his path. Consider his matches with Ambrose and Orton, neither of whom got in much of any real offense on him. An RKO gave Orton a breather but that wasn’t enough to come close to finishing Lesnar off. The matches are boring squashes which could be made better by something as simple as two or three more moves. Why is that so hard to get?

6. Baron Corbin

We’re going to jump back a little bit here as Corbin is quite like Strowman. While Corbin has been wrestling for a bit longer, he’s never really learned how to do anything more than a short match. He’s got a good finishing move and won a battle royal but after that, he’s really just been beating up Kalisto and acted like a bully for a few months. Couple that with a pretty weak offense and you don’t have much to go on.

It also doesn’t help that he has a pretty generic character. Yeah his look is good with all the tattoos but the biker music and leather vest have been done to death. Sometimes it’s ok to come up with a slightly more interesting character (or even a character at all) before bringing someone up to the next level.

Corbin is another case where he could wind up meaning something eventually and there were some glimmers of good stuff near the end of the year but he’s still in WAY over his head for the most part. The problem is there really wasn’t much left for him to do down in NXT so they kind of had to bring him up to the main roster when they did. That doesn’t leave him with much but it does leave us with having to watch him struggle through so much of the year.

7. James Ellsworth

We just can’t get away from this guy. Ellsworth is someone who took WWE by drizzle in the latter half of the year and came very close to Eugene levels of overstaying his welcome. While the idea was to have him be little more than just a goon who can’t do anything more than throw an occasional superkick, the problem is he was just there week after week with multiple moments that should have wrapped him up.

Ellsworth came in and played a role, which is perfectly fine for him to do. Unfortunately there’s a point when that role is done and it’s time to move on. For some reason that only recently happened and now he’s with Carmella for reasons that aren’t entirely clear. That’s a much better level for him to take before he’s released (with his indy bookings going through the roof as a result, meaning it’s hardly a bad thing).

As I said at the beginning of this, the person considered the worst wrestler of the year could be someone who either didn’t have a role or was incapable of having a good match. Ellsworth’s character certainly falls into the latter category as his character prevents him from having any kind of strong wrestling. Maybe he can manage to do something at a lower level but I really didn’t need to see him do anything else near the main event after all that time we saw him there.

8. Shane McMahon

You had to know we were coming to this one eventually. McMahon’s problem is far more his booking than the in ring abilities but that’s still a major problem. When you consider his two matches this year (vs. the Undertaker at “Wrestlemania XXXIII” and in the big Survivor Series match at “Survivor Series 2016”) were on major stages and McMahon was treated as the biggest deal in either, it’s hard to argue that he was booked properly.

When McMahon came back to WWE, I lost my mind. It was one of the best surprises I ever could have imagined and I was even ok with him being on the “Wrestlemania XXXII” card due to all of the injuries. However, he completely lost me when he somehow lasted half an hour against Undertaker and whatever he had left went flying out the window when he was put on the Survivor Series roster. There was NO ONE else you could put in that spot? Like, no one at all?

McMahon is the kind of guy who is brought in for the sake of hyping up a crowd. For reasons that aren’t entirely clear, he’s been pushed as the greatest thing to ever happen to the roster. Despite not wrestling a match since 2009, he’s able to hang with people like Undertaker and the best that “Monday Night Raw” has to offer? In what world does that make sense? It’s certainly not this one and he’s one of the worst things around as a result.

As weird as it is to say, I think I have to go with Lesnar. It’s not so much that his abilities aren’t great but his matches come off as lazy booking. Instead of something competitive, it seems that we’re just there to see Lesnar squash someone a few times a month, only to get destroyed by Goldberg in a big surprise. There really isn’t someone miles ahead of the pack here but Lesnar is far enough ahead to take this one.

Royal Rumble 2002
Date: January 20, 2002
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 12,915
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is the first step to things falling downhill, as we’re a few months away from the Brand Split and things falling through the floor in quality. The main event tonight aside from the Rumble is Jericho defending his newly won Undisputed Title (which he won by beating the Rock and Steve Austin IN THE SAME NIGHT in case you didn’t know that) against Rock. HHH is back in the ring tonight also (he may have fought on Smackdown before this but I don’t think he did) so let’s get to it.

The opening video has clips of various Rumble wins in a photo album kind of theme. The theme for this year’s show is 30 Men, 1 Winner. I’ve heard worse ideas which we’ll get too very soon.

Tag Titles: Spike Dudley/Tazz vs. Dudley Boys

I LOVE Stacy as the Duchess of Dudleyville. I never remember her looking better. Anyway, Spike and Tazz are defending here in a reign that I don’t think anyone ever remembers. The Dudleys beat up Spike recently so he’s in a neck brace. The Dudleys attack to start and hit the belly to back neckbreaker on Tazz on the floor. It’s Bubba vs. Spike to start things off in a handicap match for all intents and purposes. Bubba rips the neck brace off and drops a big elbow.

Bubba shouts at Spike to get up as we get a very nice shot of Stacy. Tazz is back on the apron as D-Von hits a Hennig necksnap of all things. Bubba loads up a second brainbuster on Spike but gets countered into a Dudley Dog for no cover. The tag to Tazz is missed so Spike has to take a double flapjack instead. Spike avoids a headbutt from D-Von and makes the Dudleys clothesline each other. Hot tag brings in Tazz to clean house with suplexes. A big boot to Bubba’s head sets up a top rope cross body by Spike for two. Stacy interferes and gets put in the Tazmission. D-Von gets caught in the same hold and the champions retain.

Rating: D+. I have no idea what the point of this being on PPV was as it barely broke five minutes. Nothing with Stacy in the Dudley attire can be bad, but this came about as close as you can get. Actually scratch that as it wasn’t so much bad but just short. I have no idea why this wasn’t on Raw or something like that. Tazz would be retired very soon after this due to a horrible neck.

We immediately go to a recap of Regal vs. Edge which is based on Regal using brass knuckles over and over again. Edge got fed up with it and beat up a lot of people with a chair.

Edge has a chair with him tonight to counter the knuckles. Apparently he broke Regal’s nose recently.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. William Regal

Edge is defending. The referee checks Regal over and over again for knuckles and finds them in his trunks. Well you can’t say he didn’t do his job. The referee stupidly puts them on the ring post instead of like, giving them to someone to take to the back or something. Edge pounds away to start and chokes with his boot in the corner. He goes after Regal’s bad nose as Lawler claims conspiracy.

Regal comes back with a clothesline but Edge kicks him in the back to put both guys down. Being the British dude that he is, Regal suplexes Edge down for two. Make that four. Uh six. Yet somehow that isn’t three. Off to an arm trap chinlock followed by a hard forearm to put the champion down again. A double arm powerbomb hits Edge for two and they head to the apron. Edge busts out a DDT onto said apron, further injuring Regal’s nose.

Back in and they ram heads to put both guys down as the match continues to drag at a slow pace. Edge wins a slugout and takes Regal down with a spinwheel kick and a suplex for two. Regal suplexes him down as well, only for Edge to hit a big old clothesline for two more. The Regal Stretch goes on out of nowhere but Edge reverses into a terrible version of his own to no avail. A top rope spinwheel kick puts Regal down but he finds another set of brass knuckles. Instead of swinging them though, he pulls the referee in the way of Edge’s spear. Regal clocks Edge and wins the title.

Rating: D+. This didn’t click at all. Regal didn’t seem interested in selling at all and Edge wasn’t ready to carry a match by himself yet. He was getting to the point where he could but it would take a summer of feuding with Eddie to get him up to that point. Regal wouldn’t really do anything with the belt other than lose it to RVD. Nothing to see here.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

Jacqueline is referee for absolutely no apparent reason and Trish is defending. Jazz is basically being a bully and has injured Trish’s hand coming into this. Jazz jumps Trish to start but misses a splash, giving Trish two off a rollup. A modified hot shot slows the champ down again and a legdrop gets two. Jazz works on the bad hand for a bit but Jackie pulls them out of the ropes. Jackie of course makes it all about herself and won’t count a cover on Trish. Stratusfaction hits out of nowhere for two and Jazz is up a few seconds later, basically no selling it. Trish hits a bad looking running bulldog to retain.

Rating: D. It was short, it was sloppy, the ending was stupid and Jackie was in it. What other kind of grade do you expect here? Stratus was starting to get better but it would take another year and Lita before she got amazing. Jazz was a pretty stupid pick to bring over to WWE as no one remembered her and she didn’t have the looks to back up any lack of hype. Bad match here.

Flair says he’ll win.

We recap Vince vs. Flair. Flair debuted after Survivor Series as the new co-owner of the company and has driven Vince crazy since. This led up to a street fight tonight between the two of them tonight which isn’t as big a deal as they were shooting for I don’t think. The highlight of it was Vince dressing up as Flair and saying destroying lives turned him on.

Ric Flair vs. Vince McMahon

Remember this is a street fight. Vince shoves him down to start and struts, so Flair punches him down and struts as well. Flair wins a chop battle in the corner (duh) so Vince goes to the eyes to escape. There’s the Flair Flop followed by a Flair Flip in the corner as Vince is in full control. We head to the floor and get our first weapon shot, with Vince pounding on Ric with a metal Keep Off sign.

There’s a trashcan shot to the head and Flair is busted open. How thin must the skin on his forehead be? Anyway, Vince steals a camera from someone to take a picture of Flair’s cut before we head back inside. Since he’s a jerk, Vince starts working over the knee in (less skilled) Flair fashion. The leg is wrapped around the post and Vince puts on a Figure Four that Dusty Rhodes would be jealous of.

Flair turns the hold over and Vince IMMEDIATELY lets go of the hold. So not only is he better at it than some wrestlers, he’s also smart. Never let it be said that Vince doesn’t know what he’s doing. Vince bails to the floor and grabs a lead pipe that he used to bust Flair open in the build up to the match. Flair catches him coming in with a low blow and pounds away on the floor.

Vince takes a monitor shot to the head and in a weird spot, we see a replay on the monitor on the table as the live match goes on. Vince is busted open now and we head back inside. Scratch that as we go back outside immediately where Flair’s family takes pictures of Vince’s cut. Set it up earlier, pay it off later. Good move. Back in and Flair kicks him low again just because he can, cracks him in the head with the pipe and ends it with the Figure Four.

Rating: C+. At the end of the day, this match makes as much sense as almost anything you’ll see. Vince controlled at the beginning, but at the end of the day he’s a boss and Flair is a veteran wrestler and athlete. It makes sense for him to be able to shrug that off and destroy Vince with relative ease once he got the upper hand. On top of that we got some good blood and Vince getting hit in the balls so how can this not be entertaining?

Stephanie talks trash about everyone else in the Rumble and runs down Debra as well. Austin walks up and WHAT’s her away. Cole gets a bit of it too. This is when the bit was brand new and still kind of funny, as opposed to now when it ruins almost every serious promo.

No highlight package for the world title match? For those of you not around in 2002 (LUCKY!), Jericho won the title in December, beating Rock along the way. It makes sense for Rock to get the first shot, especially since they feuded over the end of the year.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho still has both titles because HHH wasn’t there to win the first Undisputed Title and get the new belt. Rock decks him immediately and the champ heads to the floor, only to run back in and get punched some more. Jericho misses a charge and hits the post but pulls off a hot shot out of nowhere to give himself a breather. They trade strikes in the corner before Jericho hits a spinwheel kick to Rocky’s arms for two.

A suplex gets two for Jericho and for some reason Rock’s left thumb is sticking out. The champ unhooks a buckle but can’t get the Walls. A missile dropkick gets two on Rock and it’s off to the chinlock. That goes on for a good while so Chris goes up again, only to get crotched and superplexed. A belly to belly suplex gets two for Rock but Jericho clotheslines him down and hits the Lionsault. Due to high reasons of arrogance, Jericho waits forever to cover and fights with the referee after getting two.

Another dropkick attempt by Jericho is caught in a Sharpshooter, but here’s Lance Storm for a distraction while Jericho taps. Christian comes in as well and is promptly punched out by Rock. Jericho hits a Rock Bottom on Rock for two and the frustration begins. The champ loads up a People’s Elbow but Rock nips up and sends Jericho out to the floor.

Both guys are rammed into both announce tables before Jericho’s Rock Bottom attempt is countered into an AWESOME looking Rock Bottom by Rock from one table through the other. That only gets two back inside before Jericho counters another Rock Bottom into the Liontamer (yes I said Liontamer instead of the Walls). Ok now it’s the Walls, which allows Rock to make the rope.

The jumping clothesline takes the referee down by mistake, allowing Jericho to blast Rock with the belt. Another referee slides in and gets two off that and Rock DDTs Jericho down. Rock covers….and Nick Patrick won’t count. There’s a Rock Bottom for his efforts and a People’s Elbow for Jericho but there’s no referee. Rock checks on Hebner, allowing Jericho to hit him low, send him into the Chekov’s Gun in the shape of an exposed turnbuckle. All that plus a rollup with his feet on the ropes is enough for Jericho to retain the title.

Rating: B. This took awhile to get going but once things picked up it turned into what you would expect from Rock vs. Jericho in a nearly 20 minute match. The overbooking worked here as Jericho needed something to boost him up to Rock’s level, which is what you’re supposed to do as a heel. Good stuff here and a very fine title match.

Shawn Michaels, in a really stupid looking Texas flag shirt, is at WWF New York. He picks Taker or Austin to win the Rumble.

Video on the Rumble. The main picks to win are Taker, HHH, Angle and Austin.

Royal Rumble

Rikishi and Goldust are #1 and #2 respectively and we’ve got two minute intervals. Goldie walks around Rikishi to start and gets punched in the face for his efforts. Rikishi knocks him around for a bit but can’t quite drop the big load on Goldie’s chest. A backdrop puts Goldust on the apron and Boss Man is #3, making it 2-1 against Rikishi. Goldust gets punched in the face but Boss Man pounds Rikishi into the corner. The heels explode after a long one minute partnership.

Bradshaw is #4 and hopefully he can pick things up a bit. He beats up everyone as Rikishi loads up the Stinkface on Boss Man. A superkick and a clothesline put Boss Man out and there’s a Samoan Drop to Bradshaw. Goldie pounds away on Bradshaw in the corner and gets powerbombed for his efforts. Lance Storm is #5 and absolutely nothing of note happens until Al Snow (on Tough Enough at this point) is #6. Bradshaw kills Storm with the Clothesline as the fans want Head.

Billy of Billy and Chuck is #7 and we’re still waiting on something to happen. The fans are still into this at least so it’s not a failure at this point. Storm and Snow fight to the apron with Snow superkicking Lance to an elimination. Billy dumps Bradshaw and Undertaker is finally #8 to pick things up a bit. A chokeslam kills Billy (the third in the series, not starring Uma Thurman) and another one puts out Goldust. Snow and Rikishi are dumped out and Billy follows them, leaving Undertaker alone to a big reaction. He’s evil here in case you’re not up on Taker history.

Matt Hardy is #9, which is interesting as Taker injured both Hardys and Lita. The redhead gets in along with Matt and helps him take the big man down via a low blow. Matt hits a Twist of Fate and stomps away but can’t get Taker out. Naturally Jeff Hardy is #10 because that’s how the TOTALLY RANDOM draw works in the Rumble.

Taker slugs down one of the best tag teams ever in just a few seconds, only to get caught in the Twist/Swanton combo. Again, why would you use moves that keep a giant on the mat? Not that it matters as Poetry in Motion is caught and Jeff is easily thrown out. The Last Ride kills Matt and he’s gone too, leaving Taker alone again. The clock during that segment was REALLY long too as they were roughly three minutes each to get the whole segment in.

Maven from Tough Enough is #11 but Lita is on the apron. Taker PUNCHES her down, drawing the Hardys back in. Taker dumps both of them again, but Maven dropkicks Undertaker in the back and eliminates him in arguably the biggest surprise elimination ever in the Rumble. The look on the Dead Man’s face is hilarious as he has absolutely no emotion at all. He calmly turns around, gets back in the ring, and mauls Maven, sending him through the ropes to the floor. A HUGE chair shot cracks Maven’s head and the beating continues until Scotty 2 Hotty is #12.

Taker punches Scotty down and throws Maven back in to eliminate him, which under old Rumble rules would count. The beating goes into the crowd as there’s nothing in the ring at the moment. Christian is #13 but has no one to fight because Scotty is still down. Instead we go to the back where Maven is rammed face first into a popcorn machine. Taker eats a handful of popcorn and finally leaves Maven alone.

Scotty gets in and walks into a DDT as DDP is #14. Nothing of note continues to happen until Scotty superkicks Page through the ropes to the floor and hits the Worm on Christian. Page sneaks back in and throws Scotty out as Chuck is #15. They all beat on each other for a bit with Christian and Chuck teaming up for a bit. Godfather, now the owner of an escort service in an attempt to salvage the gimmick, is #16 and brings out 12 good looking women with him. Page is eliminated off camera during this.

With Godfather in the ring after about 15 seconds due to dancing, Albert is #17. He’s the Hip Hop Hippo at this point and lasts about 45 seconds before being tossed by the villains. Godfather is dumped soon thereafter, and here’s Saturn at #18. Chuck and Perry slug it out as the fans cheer for the Ho’s leaving. Nothing happens again, until Austin is #19. Chuck is the first victim, getting stomped down in the corner. There goes Christian, Saturn gets a Stunner, Chuck is eliminated, Saturn is dumped, Christian gets thrown back in, Stunned and thrown out again, Chuck gets the same as Christian, and Austin takes a breather.

Val Venis is #20 (and also returning) and things go about as you would expect, although Val does get in some offense and survives until Test is #21. A double teaming lasts for a bit until Austin remembers who he’s fighting and dumps both guys in a few seconds. Austin does his watch bit when no one is in the ring with him. Notice the difference between the big stars and the regular guys: the big ones are CONSTANTLY trying to keep the audience entertained instead of letting them die.

Speaking of entertaining the crowd, HHH is #22. The entrance takes about a minute and a half, they stare at each other for about twenty more seconds, and the slugout only lasts for a few seconds until Hurricane is #23. Luckily for him, the legends knock each other down so Hurricane can tries a double chokeslam. The look on Austin’s face is hilarious as the two of them dump Hurricane with ease.

Austin and HHH chop each other in the corner until Faarooqq is #24 and lasts about that many seconds. Mr. Perfect makes a surprise return at #25 to a big surprise reaction from the audience. He looks a bit, shall we say, tipsy here. Perfect chills on the floor a bit as JR makes a mistake, saying Perfect debuted at the Rumble in 1993. In reality he was #4 in 1989. Austin and HHH double team Perfect to no avail so here’s Angle at #26, drawing the rare double chant of YOU SUCK WHAT.

HHH and Angle pair off as do the other two guys and the match slows down a bit. Kurt starts suplexing people but can’t dump HHH because Austin makes the save due to reasons of a big ego. Big Show is #27 in his one piece women’s swimsuit. Angle gets chokeslammed so Austin and HHH double team the big man to limited avail. HHH saves Angle, presumably because he wants Kurt’s help to get Show out. Makes sense I guess.

Show dominates everyone until Kane is #28. HHH gets chokeslammed so we can have our battle of the giants. Jerry: “They’re not getting any smaller are they JR?” Uh yeah Jerry, actually they are. They do the double chokeslam spot but Kane kicks Show low and picks him up, slamming him to the floor. AWESOME display of strength there, but Angle immediately dumps Kane to get us back down to four.

Van Dam is #29 and hits a Five Star on Angle who is down from something we didn’t see. Everyone but HHH gets kicked down so he hits a Pedigree to put Van Dam down. Booker T is #30, giving us a final group of Booker, RVD, Angle, Perfect, HHH and Austin. Booker throws out RVD without having to do anything else thanks to the Pedigree. We get a Spinarooni, followed by a Stunner and elimination to get us down to Austin, Angle, HHH and Perfect.

Austin hits a slingshot into the post on HHH who walks into an Angle Slam. Angle rolls some Germans on Austin and the C/Kurts try to dump Austin. Austin hits some HARD right hands to break that up but as he tries to dump Perfect, Angle runs up and dumps the Rattlesnake. Austin pulls Perfect to the floor but Kurt sends Austin into the steps to break it up. Steve still isn’t done as he comes back in with a chair for all three guys. Eh he’s Austin so he can get away with it.

Angle accidentally clothesline Hennig but doesn’t eliminate him. There’s the PerfectPlex (BIG pop for that) to Kurt but HHH dumps Perfect a second later. Angle and HHH stare each other down and the Game pounds away on him to take over. Kurt gets HHH to the apron but can’t get the win. HHH chokes away but charges into a backdrop, sending him to the apron. Kurt makes the classic mistake of not making sure the other guy is out and gets clotheslined to the floor, giving HHH the Rumble. For you trivia guys, this is the longest Rumble ever to date, even going 11 seconds longer than the 40 man version.

Rating: C+. This has some very bad spots in it but the rest of the stuff is solid all around. Once Austin gets in there things pick up a lot, but the 18 guys before him don’t do much. Taker’s elimination came too fast which hurt things here, as there was no one of note from #9 until Austin at #19. Still though, the good stuff here was good enough to check this out, but you might want to fast forward some parts of it.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a pretty good but certainly not great show. 2002 was a bad year for the company on Raw and things were clearly starting to look weak here. The main problem was the lack of elevation of anyone new to the main event in the year, as the main events for almost every PPV were people who had been there before. There’s nothing on here that’s required viewing but there’s also nothing terrible on here either. Check it out but don’t expect to be blown away.

Ratings Comparison

Spike Dudley/Tazz vs. Billy and Chuck

Original: C-

Redo: D+

William Regal vs. Edge

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

Original: D+

Redo: D

Ric Flair vs. Vince McMahon

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Chris Jericho vs. The Rock

Original: B+

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Yep, about the same for the most part here.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/21/royal-rumble-count-up-2002-game-on/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

205 Live
Date: January 10, 2017
Location: Raising Cane’s River Center Arena, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Corey Graves, Austin Aries

With less than three weeks before the Royal Rumble, it’s pretty clear that we’re getting Neville vs. Rich Swann for the title at the pay per view. All we’re waiting on now is the official announcement and there’s a good chance that it’s going to be set up here. We’ve also got the ongoing issues of Cedric Alexander vs. Noam Dar over Alicia Fox. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Dar vs. Alexander with Cedric coming this close to blaming Fox for his losses and Dar being all creepy as he tries to steal her.

Opening sequence.

Cedric Alexander vs. Noam Dar

It’s amazing how much good a story can help out a match like this. Well that and Alicia Fox being on camera too. Before the match, Dar says the kiss from Alicia last night didn’t deter him and he’ll have her soon enough. Feeling out process to start with both guys being a bit tentative until Cedric just punches him in the jaw.

Noam isn’t sure what to do so they head outside with Cedric firing off some chops. An elbow to the face makes Alicia very happy but Dar is smart enough to kick Alexander in the chest while he tries a Tajiri handspring. Dar works on the arm due to all the strikes he’s had to deal with so far. A cross arm choke keeps Cedric in trouble before Noam splashes the arm.

We hit another armbar for a bit until a hard elbow drops Dar. Cedric tries to go up but springboards into a Fujiwara armbar (on the wrong arm but nice try). The arm is crushed under the steps until Alicia gets in Dar’s way, allowing Cedric to hit one heck of a baseball slide. Now the springboard clothesline works a bit better and Cedric kicks him in the face for good measure. Alexander goes up top for a moonsault but Fox pulls Dar out of the way. As Alicia looks very confused, Dar knees Cedric in the face for the pin at 12:35.

Rating: B-. Well that was odd but in a good way. They’ve gotten me to the point where I want to see what’s going to happen with the story and I really didn’t expect that. Fox could be awesome as the woman who switches sides by turning on Alexander but I’m not sure if that’s where they’re going. That makes the story just a bit better, which is a surprising touch.

Fox slaps Dar and leaves with Cedric as she still looks confused.

Akira Tozawa is coming soon. That’s a good thing.

Brian Kendrick vs. Sean Maluta

Kendrick is annoyed at Tajiri for spraying the mist last week and promises to take it out on Maluta. Sean actually grabs some rollups for two and a basement dropkick puts Kendrick on the floor to set up a flip dive. Back in and Maluta is sent into the buckle so Kendrick can grab a cobra clutch. That doesn’t last long and Maluta gets in a reverse DDT but misses Rolling Thunder. A gordbuster and Shining Wizard give Maluta two more but his frog splash (because it’s always a frog splash, 450 or shooting star) hits knees. The Captain’s Hook makes Maluta tap at 4:43.

Rating: C+. Maluta continues to be someone with a lot of potential which hopefully he’ll get to build on someday. The idea of Kendrick being all cocky and almost losing because of it was the right call. Then again the idea of Kendrick in general tends to completely deflate me as he’s just not that interesting but such is life in WWE.

Alexander yells at Fox and breaks up with her. Fox gets all whiny and freaks out because no one breaks up with her. This is some combination of bad and amazing but I’m not sure which is better.

Here’s Jack Gallagher for his parley with Ariya Daivari. Gallagher lays down his umbrella (named William) and offers Daivari some tea or biscuits but Daivari wants to get to the point. Jack thinks his honor has been besmirched and asks for negotiations to begin. Daivari thinks Gallagher wants to surrender because people like Jack are always going to lose. Gallagher: “Pardon?”

Apparently Gallagher is fine with these negotiations not being peaceful so they agree to an I Forfeit match to wrap up their feud once and for all. Daivari signs but throws William, meaning the jacket comes off. Gallagher: “I hope the Queen isn’t watching.” The brawl is on until the referees come out to break it up.

Rich Swann vs. Tony Nese

Non-title. They start fast for a change with Swann flipping over Nese and dropkicking him out to the floor. Nese shows some intelligence by dropping Swann ribs first across the barricade to take over. A bodyscissors sets up a gutbuster for two and Nese squeezes the ribs again. Rich gets up and pops him in the face a few times before a hurricanrana gets two. Nese sticks to the game plan though with a legsweep and stomp to the ribs. Swann grabs a tiger bomb for two and the spinning kick to the head ends Nese at 7:32.

Rating: C. Swann needed a clean win like this and that’s a good sign going into the title match against Neville, which is all but guaranteed at this point. Nese is a good choice for a dragon to be slayed and that’s what we got here. It’s still not a good sign for his title reign when Neville is this hot as a heel but it’s been nice while it lasted.

Post match Neville comes out to challenge Swann, who insults Neville’s ears in response. Neville says he’s not getting in the ring with Swann unless it’s a Cruiserweight Title shot. Swann is fine with that and says name the time and place. That would be the Royal Rumble so Swann says it’s on to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The important thing about this show is the idea of actually setting something up for the future. It’s not just a bunch of random matches anymore as they’re advancing stories and making things a little more interesting than the old six man tags that dominated the early episodes. I’m not dreading the show anymore and I’m starting to look forward to seeing where some of this stuff goes, which is a very positive sign.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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WWE UK Tournament
Date: January 14, 2017
Location: Empress Ballroom, Blackpool, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Nigel McGuinness

This is an interesting one as the WWE is trying to break into the British market by holding a sixteen man tournament over the course of two days. The winner will be crowned the first ever WWE UK Champion with the possibility of further tournaments taking place in Asia and Mexico based on the success here. Let’s get to it.

Let’s get this out of the way: I don’t know most of these people and I’m basically going off what WWE tells me about them. I think I prefer it that way too.

All matches today will be first round matches so I won’t bother listing them as such.

We look at various WWE moments in the UK over the years, including Summerslam 1992 and Takeover: London.

HHH, sporting the biggest beard I’ve ever seen on him, comes to the stage to welcome us to the show. He talks about building empires and asks if we’re ready.

The arena looks very cool and actually feels grand for a change.

We look at the brackets.

Video on Trent Seven, complete with clips Progress Wrestling.

Video on H.C. Dyer, who seems to be a boxer/striker.

All first round matches have a fifteen minute time limit.

Trent Seven vs. H.C. Dyer

Trent likes his mustache and is a current Progress Wrestling Tag Team Champion (as mentioned by Cole which is very strange to hear). Dyer dropkicks him down and they head to the floor for some chops. Back in and Seven does a running chop of all things before a suplex gets two (with a feel of the mustache at the same time).

Dyer gets in a spinebuster for two of his own and that big right hand gets another delayed near fall. Something like a Blue Thunder Bomb gets two more as Nigel is taking issue with Dyer’s weak covers. So he’s the British Gorilla Monsoon. Back up and a spinning backfist sets up the Seven Star Lariat (Rainmaker) to put Dyer away at 7:28.

Rating: C. This was fine and you can tell they want to give Seven quite the push. Dyer has a good look but you could tell he was in trouble when the one move he talked about only got a near fall. The wrestling was fine, albeit a bit generic, which is going to be the case in a lot of these matches because there’s no story here other than the tournament.

Video on Danny Burch, who wrestled on NXT as a pretty tough jobber for a few years.

Video on Jordan Devlin, who is Finn Balor’s protege.

Balor is in the front row.

Danny Burch vs. Jordan Devlin

They trade arm holds to start with Burch pulling him out of the air by the leg (that’s a new one) but not following up on it. Nigel does not approve and Devlin takes over, meaning we might need to listen to Nigel some more. Burch gets pulled off the middle rope for two and it’s off to the chinlock. A pull of the back of the head puts Burch down as Devlin is certainly the heel here.

Devlin gets annoyed at the fans and rakes the eyes to keep Danny in check. Danny comes back with a middle rope dropkick but actually loses a slugout. One heck of a clothesline drops Jordan for two and we hit the Crossface to give Devlin a very scared look. A spinning head kick (think Trouble in Paradise) knocks Burch silly and cuts his head open. The referee counts to three at 8:48, even though Burch’s shoulder was up, which seems like a way to stop the match for the cut.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one as much and the somewhat botched ending didn’t do it any favors. Devlin didn’t feel like the most natural heel in the world and it was kind of hard to care about him. Burch felt more natural but that cut on the head looked rather nasty at the same time.

Devlin knocks him down again after the match and insists that was a clean win.

Video on Saxton Huxley, who is very intelligent.

Video on Sam Gradwell, who grew up with an alcoholic mom and all he cares about is what happens in the ring.

Saxton Huxley vs. Sam Gradwell

Technical sequence to start with Gradwell working on an armbar followed by a dropkick for two. A butterfly backbreaker puts Sam down as the fans are now singing about Huxley. Some shots to the face drop Huxley and a good looking top rope headbutt sends Gradwell on at 6:03.

Rating: C-. How in the world was that a six minute match? It felt like they had barely been out there for a minute and a half but the match was fine enough. Gradwell got my attention and that’s a good sign going forward. Good match here, though the crowd mostly spent the match mentioning how much Huxley looks like Jesus.

Dave Taylor is at ringside.

Video on Pete Dunne, who is known as the Bruiserweight. He describes himself as unique and enjoys hurting people.

Video on Roy Johnson, who is the most wavy guy in wrestling. If you don’t know what that is, we’re not talking about it. He’s a power guy.

Pete Dunne vs. Roy Johnson

Disclaimer: Johnson used to post on the same forums I run so I’m very biased in this one. Dunne takes him down and cranks on the fingers but a shoulder has no effect. Johnson dances at him and gets slapped in the face, only to get muscled up into a suplex. They head outside with Pete crushing the hand against the steps.

Back in and Dunne bends the arm back as he’s picking Johnson apart here. Dunne even takes off the glove and cranks on the hand some more. A flapjack and middle rope shoulder put Dunne down though and a Samoa drop gets two. Roy jumps into a stiff right hand for two followed by an enziguri for the same. Johnson gets in a Big Ending for two more but gets caught in a pumphandle flatliner to give Dunne the pin at 7:45.

Rating: B-. Good match here with Johnson surviving longer than it seemed he would have. It’s clear that Dunne is going to be a big deal in this tournament and the announcers made it clear that Johnson was in over his head here. Still though, solid match and Johnson did better than I was expecting.

Dunne won’t shake hands post match.

Video on Wolfgang, who has always wanted to be here. He’s the lone Scottish representative here.

Video on Tyson T-Bone who wants to fight and honor his gypsy heritage.

T-Bone talks about traveling the world earning a living with his fans and all that matters is who is up next.

Wolfgang vs. Tyson T-Bone

Tyson headbutts him during the introductions and the fight is on early. Wolfgang gets in a few shots of his own but a suplex and hard whip into the corner give Tyson a near fall. Tyson’s suplex is reversed into one from Wolfgang, followed by Wasteland. A middle rope moonsault gives Wolfgang two but Tyson posts him for an eight count on the floor. Back in and Wolfgang breaks up a superplex, setting up a Swanton Bomb for the pin at 6:18.

Rating: C-. Not great stuff here but the ending was quite the surprise. They had built Tyson up as a big star and then he just lost clean in the end. T-Bone wasn’t the most impressive guy in the world but he looked a bit more impressive than Wolfgang, who didn’t do much for me here. This wasn’t terrible but I’ve seen worse.

Wolfgang says the title is coming home with the big bad wolf.

Video on Joseph Conners, who is missing part of his ear due to a fight.

Video on James Drake who has wrestled people from all over the world and gotten paid to win. People will be talking about him when he wins.

Joseph Conners vs. James Drake

They lock up to start and actually go to the mat without breaking the hold. Drake goes after the missing ear before blasting Joseph with a clothesline. A double stomp out of the corner stops Drake as Cole keeps changing from Conners to Connor. Back in and Conners changes gears a bit by going after Drake’s ear. Not that it’s injured in the first place or anything but it seems to be working. After a chinlock goes nowhere, Drake unloads on him in the corner and gets two off an enziguri. Conners drives him into the corner and grabs a lifting delayed flatliner (Don’t Look Down) for the pin at 7:19.

Rating: C+. This was a bit weird as the ear thing kept going but at least the match was physical and ended with a bit of a surprise. It’s one of the better matches of the tournament so far and the announcers thought it would be the best. I’ve seen Conners before and I’ve liked what I’ve seen so far.

Video on Mark Andrews, who wants to prove Wales proud. You might know him as Mandrews in TNA.

Video on Dan Moloney, who is from a very dark place and shouldn’t say what he’s seen.

Mandrews has been an underdog his whole life but he’s willing to fight.

Dan Moloney vs. Mark Andrews

Moloney is only 19. Andrews starts early with the flips and scores with a basement dropkick into an armbar. Dan throws him into the air for a crash and near fall but Andrews stomps on the ribs to take over again. The fans seem to like Andrews who gets two off a standing moonsault. Dan tries something like an F5 but seems to slip up, only to hit a sitout F5 on the second attempt. A running kick to the face gets two but Andrews grabs a Stunner to put Dan down. The shooting star press advances Moloney at 5:45.

Rating: C-. I’ve never gotten the appeal of Andrews as there are just people better at the exact same style. Then again that might have been due to him being in TNA under the name of Mandrews, which has never sounded anything but dumb. He was a lot better here though and the high flying was a nice change of pace.

Video on Tucker, who is a technical wrestler.

Video on Tyler Bate, who is 19 and only cares about the 1-2-3.

Tucker vs. Tyler Bate

Feeling out process to start with both guys missing (not botching) a few moves early on. Bate offers a test of strength but just suckers Tucker in for a left hand to the jaw. Tucker comes right back with a middle rope elbow to the face but Bate grabs a headlock, picks up his own foot and puts it onto Tucker’s head. It’s off to a cravate for a good while until Tucker kicks him in the head, giving us an amusing look on Bate’s face.

Bate comes right back with a middle rope uppercut and another one stops Tucker’s suicide dive. A hurricanrana off the steps puts Bate down but we go very old school with an airplane spin (in both directions) on Tucker. The Super Duper Kick knocks Bate silly but also out to the floor, meaning it’s only good for two. Back up and a rolling kick to Tucker’s head sets up the Tyler Driver 97 to put Tucker away at 10:35.

Rating: B+. Match of the night here with Bate looking WAY better than a nineteen year old should. Tucker looked fine here as well and they had the best match so far, which isn’t what I was expecting here. Cole thinks Bate is the favorite for the tournament but that might be a bit of a stretch, which is Cole’s strong suit. At least this was entertaining though.

Here are the quarterfinal brackets:

Tyler Bate

Jordan Devlin

Trent Seven

Wolfgang

Mark Andrews

Joseph Conners

Pete Dunne

Sam Gradwell

Cole gives us a highlight package on the night.

Nigel and William Regal bring out the wrestlers who advanced to the second round. Dunne punches Gradwell in the face and gets yelled at to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this more than I was expecting to as I’m really not the target audience for something like this. The wrestling was mostly solid with nothing really bad and some names stood out above some others. It’s not a great show but I have enough fun with it and that’s all it needed to be. I’m looking forward to day two and I didn’t expect to be so we’ll call this a success.

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