Wrestling Challenge
Date: November 1, 1986
Location: War Memorial, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

These shows continue to be easy watches and are making me want to see some of the live events where the feuds are blown off. That means they’re doing something right and I could go for seeing more of this stuff to see if they can keep it up in the short term. That’s tricky to do so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming this week.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Savage vs. Billy Jack Haynes

Savage, with Elizabeth, is defending and commentary points out how rare it is to a title match on TV, which is rather true. Haynes shrugs off a wristlock to start and grabs a headlock. That’s broken up and Savage sends him hard into the buckle for two. Haynes fights up and hits a clothesline, setting up the full nelson. Savage swings and hits the referee, who calls for the DQ and the bell at 4:55.

Rating: C. Not much to see here, with the biggest story being the crooked referee. That is something that could go rather big if done properly and they seem to be on their way. Haynes could have been just about anyone in the role as Savage could work well with everybody. It wasn’t much of a match, but at least it moved a bigger story forward.

Post match Davis clarifies that Hayes swung Savage into him so Savage wins. Monsoon: “IT WAS SNEAKY!”

We get a Wrestlers’ Rebuttal from Hulk Hogan, who knows the fans believe in him. Orndorff is the one in the wrong and the fans want Hogan to destroy him.

Islanders vs. Mike Sharpe/Terry Gibbs

Gibbs and Tama start things off with Tama knocking him down. The insert promo from the Dream Team talks about how the Islanders are supposed to play hockey. Everything breaks down and Sharpe takes over on Tama, with a double back elbow putting him down. It’s off to Haku to clean house, including planting Sharpe. A top rope splash gives Tama the pin at 2:55.

Davey Boy Smith introduces Matilda, who we’ve already met. Dynamite Kid comes in to say they’re ready for any team, including the Dream Team.

George Steele tried to order fast food but could only say EAT. Well yeah.

Nikolai Volkoff/Iron Sheik/Hercules Hernandez vs. Lanny Poffo/SD Jones/Corporal Kirschner

Slick is here with the villains. Poffo does not like the Soviet National Anthem and reads a poem about how we should chant USA. Jones hammers on Volkoff to start and hands it off to Poffo to pull on the arm. Slick talks about how Hercules is going to win the WWF Title as Kirschner comes in, only to get suplexed by Sheik. Hernandez grabs the backbreaker (torture rack) for the submission at 1:23. I would have bet on Jones taking the fall there.

The Killer Bees think they deserve a Tag Team Title shot. B. Brian Blair is excited about an upcoming youth amateur wrestling tournament in his hometown. Nothing wrong with that.

Hart Foundation vs. Pedro Morales/Tito Santana

Jimmy Hart is here with the Harts. Neidhart knees Santana in the ribs to start but Santana is back up with a quick dropkick. Jimmy trips Santana down and we get an insert promo from Jimmy talking about how he would NEVER use the megaphone to cheat. Morales comes in and gets caught in the wrong corner, allowing for some assisted choking. A backdrop gets Morales out of trouble and it’s off to Santana as everything breaks down. They all fight to the floor and it’s a double countout at 2:52. That’s a surprise for the Harts, who were quite the up and coming team.

We’re off to the Snake Pit with Jake Roberts saying this is a special week for him. He brings out quite the big deal guest with Roddy Piper, who gets to join the NEW Pit. Piper makes it clear that he doesn’t like either kind of snake (meaning Damien and/or Roberts) but Roberts wants him to touch Damien. With that not happening, Piper decks Roberts and leaves.

Rougeau Brothers vs. Tiger Chung Lee/Barry O

Raymond works on a top wristlock with O to start before they both miss elbow drops. Dino Bravo pops in to say he’s the only worthwhile Canadian wrestler and the Rougeaus make him sick to his stomach. Lee comes in to take over on Jacques as Heenan asks which Rougeau is in the ring. Monsoon: “That’s Jacques.” Heenan: “Who cares?” Raymond comes back in and Le Bombe de Rougeau finishes O at 1:55.

Jack Tunney announces that the company is officially looking into Danny Davis’ ability to referee.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Moondog Rex

Steamboat grabs a headlock to start but Rex powers up and sends him into the corner. A quick rollup out of said corner gives Steamboat the pin at 1:25. Well that was short.

The Dream Team want the Tag Team Titles back and do not like being compared to dogs. Valentine: “WE’RE THE DREAM TEAM! WE’VE GOT DOLLS MADE OF US!” Valentine goes on a rant about how the Bulldogs are going to have to deal with them and the titles are changing.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Roll those highlights.

Overall Rating: C+. There were some weird choices for the decisions on here but the talent alone made it work. This show had appearances or matches from Randy Savage, the British Bulldogs, the Hart Foundation, Ricky Steamboat, Roddy Piper, Ricky Steamboat and more. That is an absolute murderers row of talent and just seeing them do basic matches is a lot of fun in a short span. It might not have been a great show, but it was nice to see all of these people in one place.

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: October 25, 1986
Location: War Memorial, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re still going with a look back at this show, which makes for some very fun moments. It’s such a simpler time and yet the storylines are being advanced to make you want to see what happens at live events. I get why things have changed so much today, but it still makes for such easy to watch television. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming on the show.

Bob Orton/Don Muraco vs. Mike Kelly/Nick Kiniski

There’s quite a bit to unpack here actually. Muraco and Orton have Jimmy Hart and Mr. Fuji with them and Orton is in a kilt to mock Roddy Piper, along with coming to the ring to his theme song. Kiniski is the son of Gene, minus anything resembling the talent or interest. Kiniski gets taken into the corner and powered around by Orton, allowing Kelly to come in. Muraco (with an amazing beard) Tombstones Kelly for the pin at 2:11. Kelly would be a bit better when he changed his name to Shane Douglas.

We get a Wrestlers’ Rebuttal from Bobby Heenan and King Harley Race, with Heenan complaining about people not kneeling before royalty. And then the other wrestlers think they belong in the same ring as Race! What rudeness!

Hillbilly Jim vs. Al Navarro

Navarro bounces off of him to start and a hammerlock doesn’t seem to work much better. A big boot and the bearhug finish for Jim at 2:32, a lot of which was spent walking around before they got started.

As Jim leaves, he is given a picture of the new WWF Magazine with Miss Elizabeth, which he kisses. So he’s chosen death.

Jake Roberts says Ricky Steamboat beat him in a fluke and he’s not afraid of anyone. Bring on George Steele, Tito Santana or Koko B. Ware. If you bring Frankie B. Ware around his snake, Frankie B. Gone soon. Roberts isn’t afraid of anyone, and he wants the Intercontinental Title. Once you have that, you can face Hulk Hogan anytime you want. So why not just go after Hogan? Either way, he warns Randy Savage to be ready.

Butch Reed vs. Don Driggers

Slick handles Reed’s introduction and we get an insert promo from Junkyard Dog, who says there is nothing natural about the Natural. Reed shoves Driggers down to start and gets in the posing, which works so well that he does it again. Some forearms put Driggers down again and Reed plants him with a slam. The middle rope clothesline finishes for Reed at 2:41.

The Honky Tonk Man talks about being up for 48 hours and rocking all night. He’s ready to strut n stroll and rock n roll. And his favorite song is Great Balls Of Fire. This was a parody right? It has to be. I would say no one could be that stupid but….yeah.

The Machines tried to buy a compact car but asked about the price in yen. Why they’re in their wrestling gear isn’t clear. Of course they’re not quite able to fit into the car and hilarity…well is teased but it doesn’t ensue.

Dino Bravo vs. Sivi Afi

Bravo, with dark hair, is Johnny V.’s newest star. Bravo takes him down without much trouble and hits a clothesline. A hard chop puts Afi down for a knee to the head as the dominance is on. Afi misses a charge into the corner and a fairly nasty belly to back suplex finishes for Bravo at 2:38.

It’s time for the Snake Pit, with the Honky Tonk Man as the special guest. Roberts asks if he’s a strong and successful man like his mama wanted. Honky Tonk Man isn’t sure what Roberts would know what it means to make a mama happy. Roberts doesn’t see Honky Tonk’s name on any walls so has he ever been this close to a real man? That doesn’t work for Honky Tonk, who thinks anyone who plays with a snake is a sick human being. Honky Tonk isn’t scared of Roberts or the snake but leaves anyway.

Killer Bees vs. Moondog Spot/Jimmy Jack Funk

What a weird heel team. Heenan wants to know why the Bees are introduced in the masks, get their names announced, and then take the masks off. Monsoon brushes it off despite Heenan having a totally fair question. Blair works on Spot’s arm to start as we get an insert interview from Dave Hebner talking about how hard it is to be a referee, which doesn’t make Danny Davis look good.

It’s off to Brunzell, who gets slammed down by Funk as the villains actually take over. A middle rope fist drop gets two as Heenan insists he never makes excuses if his men lose a match. Brunzell’s jumping knee gets two as everything breaks down. An atomic drop/dropkick combination finishes Funk at 3:36.

Rating: C. Not bad here, with the Bees being yet another team added to the already awesome division. It says a lot when the Bees, who would be at the top of almost any tag division, are in the middle of the pack at this point. They’re good at what they do and this was the kind of match that helps them get established as a bigger deal.

Ricky Steamboat, in a sweet Saturday Night’s Main Event hat, says don’t do drugs.

Back in 1984, Kamala, with Freddie Blassie and Kim Chee (called Friday here), was on Tuesday Night Titans with Blassie talking about how brutal Kamala can be. Then Kamala was presented with a live chicken, sending Vince McMahon into quite the rant. Not on THIS show of course. They really couldn’t do something new here and needed to go back two years for such a clip?

Kamala vs. Tony Nando

Kamala, with the Wizard and Kim Chee, chops him down to start and chokes near the apron. A big boot sets up the splash for the pin on Nando at 1:25.

After the match, we see a photo from the previously mentioned Tuesday Night Titans with Kamala looking at the camera with feathers around his face.

Ricky Steamboat is ready for another round with Jake Roberts. When it comes to becoming a champion, just do as Hulk Hogan told you to do and say your prayers, take your vitamins and train hard. Steamboat would love to be the Intercontinental Champion because it makes you a top contender to the WWF Title. Elizabeth is mentioned but George Steele runs in to say Savage is USING Elizabeth. Steele worries about her and Steamboat is going to beat Savage. Maybe Steele will hurt Savage too!

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Roll the highlights.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this one more than the previous week, as it felt like it was starting to build to some bigger things. You can see wrestlers starting to talk about each other and that should make for a good slate of house shows down the line. That has me wondering what we’re going to see and these shows are the appetizers on the way to the more important stuff.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: October 18, 1986
Location: War Memorial, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re back to this after nearly two years away and while that should usually make for some slight confusion, it isn’t like there is much to remember around here. We are on the way to pretty much nothing right now, but there are enough feuds to keep things interesting. I’ve always liked this show so odds are I’ll have a good time with it again. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s who to expect on the show.

Koko B. Ware vs. Steve Lombardi

During his entrance, Ware talks about the importance of Frankie, who Heenan wants in a back of Shane N Bake. Lombardi tries a quick takedown and gets blocked, sending Monsoon and Heenan into a funny argument over Ware’s intelligence or lack thereof. Ware claps a lot and sends Lombardi shoulder first into the post. An elbow to the face sets up the Ghostbuster (brainbuster) to give Ware the pin at 2:38. The smash cut to a closeup of Frankie the bird’s face is quite jarring.

We go to Wrestlers’ Rebuttal, with Roddy Piper comparing Don Muraco and Bob Orton to various pests, such as flies and roaches. Muraco would need a surfboard the size of the Bismark to get him into the water and just hurting Piper’s knee isn’t going to get rid of him. Not much time here but Piper got in some good lines as usual.

We go to a spa where Paul Orndorff gets his hair and nails done, along with a shoe shine because he demands perfection. As you might guess, he isn’t overly polite, even as he’s having his sneakers shined. The ranting and raving goes on for quite awhile.

Paul Orndorff vs. Tony Parks

Bobby Heenan is with Orndorff, who has the stolen real American theme in one of my favorite angles that needs to be brought back. Johnny V joins in on commentary and likes Orndorff having the song because it’s just such a perfect fit. Orndorff starts fast with a suplex and stomps away. The beating goes to the floor before a clotheslines drops Parks back inside. The piledriver finishes (with a hand to the ear on the cover) for Orndorff at 1:25.

Tito Santana wants to see Roddy Piper against either Don Muraco or Bob Orton. After speaking some Spanish to his fans, Santana promises to keep coming after Randy Savage and the Intercontinental Title.

Dick Slater vs. Bob Bradley

Yeah it’s the Rebel Dick Slater, which went as well as you would expect. Especially in a northern state like New York. Slater takes him into the corner to start but possibly crooked referee Danny Davis breaks it up. We get an inset interview from Davis (as luck would have it), where he says he doesn’t care about all the letters fans are sending in to criticize his abilities. What do they know about refereeing? A small package gives Slater two and Bradley tries a crossbody, with Slater ducking to send Bradley flying over the top in a great visual. Slater suplexes him down and hits a top rope elbow to the head for the pin at 3:02.

Rating: C-. Slater just had nothing to make him stand out in this role. He’s usually good when he’s more of a crazy evil southern/country boy but here he’s just a generic good guy with a rebel flag jacket. It’s not interesting and there’s no way around it, which was on display here. It’s a bad sign when the most memorable moment is a jobber missing a crossbody and crashing to the floor, but it’s more interesting than anything Slater was doing.

The Rougeau Brothers are still undefeated and want the Tag Team Titles. Jacques throws in some French for some flavor. Apparently he said he’s glad to meet French speaking fans on the road because that’s their native language.

Dream Team vs. Rick Hunter/Jerry Allen

Johnny V is here with the Dream Team as Valentine slams Allen down to start. We get an insert interview from V about being friends with Bobby Heenan, just in case you needed his evilness confirmed. Beefcake comes in to shrug off Hunter’s forearms and hit a powerslam. An elbow sets up the Figure Four to finish Hunter at 2:39.

And now, the Snake Pit. Jake Roberts says this is his place at his time so welcome to the theater of the cruel but fair. The guest if Junkyard Dog, who isn’t interested in being around snakes. Roberts accuses him of being superstitious and they argue about a potential match. Dog says the only things anyone is going to make him do is stay Black and die. He’s still done with the snake and we’re done after a kind of weird argument.

Sika vs. Jose Luis Rivera

Sika has the Wizard with him and jumps Rivera to start fast. Some forearms to the back set up a chinlock as Wizard gets an insert promo about….a shark’s tooth? The chinlock goes on again but Rivera fights up. A dropkick has no effect though and a running headbutt gives Sika the win at 2:07.

We meet the British Bulldogs’ new mascot Matilda, with Bobby Heenan coming up to insult her. The Bulldogs threaten Heenan with the removal of his leg and he’s gone.

British Bulldogs vs. Rudy Diamond/Steve Regal

Non-title and as always, no not that Regal. I’m not sure why Diamond doesn’t get a name graphic. Some headbutts rock Regal to start and a snap suplex takes him down again. Diamond comes in and gets taken down just as fast, with Kid dropping a knee. The running powerslam connects but Regal makes the save. That earns him a fireman’s carry and Kid comes in with a headbutt off Regal’s back for the pin at 2:16. Total squash.

Slick talks about his newest signee, Butch Reed, who will be a great addition to his team. Nikolai Volkoff and the Iron Sheik come in to pose as well. They want the Tag Team Titles and more posing ensues.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

The usual highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: C-. Not one of their more thrilling shows this week, as the people featured were only so interesting. Granted it helps when the card is full of squashes as it allows more wrestlers to get on the show, but 45 minutes of such matches are only going to get you so far. The Orndorff and Piper stuff was good, but that shouldn’t be a surprise in the slightest. Still though, this stuff is such a breeze compared to everything else as it’s such a different style than modern wrestling, which makes it a great change of pace.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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The Big Event
Date: August 28, 1986
Location: Exhibition Stadium, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 61,470
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Johnny Valiant, Ernie Ladd

So in March 1987, Wrestlemania III completely redefined the idea of a major wrestling show. However, less than a year earlier, there was this show, which is often forgotten by comparison. It is headlined by a major showdown between Hulk Hogan and Paul Orndorff, which is an absolutely red hot feud. Let’s get to it.

Note that this is the Coliseum Video version of the show, which features a bunch of cuts to get it under two hours.

Gene Okerlund is in a helicopter over Toronto and we get some random short clips from the show. This is described as “the WWF and Hulkamania come to Toronto” in case you didn’t know what this was really about. We also hear about some of the card, which is always nice.

Funks vs. Killer Bees

Jimmy Hart is here with the Funks (Jimmy Jack/Hoss, the latter being better known as Dory Jr.). Hoss and Blair start things off with Blair taking over off some early slams. The Funks already need a breather on the floor before getting back inside for a double noggin knocker. Jack headlocks Brunzell and is promptly slammed down as well. Back in again and a crossbody gets two on Hoss before Blair cranks on the arm.

Hoss finally gets in an elbow and hands it back to Jack, who is taken into the wrong corner again. A sleeper has Jack in more trouble as Monsoon gets on Johnny V for cheering for the Funks. Hoss comes back in and sends Blair outside to FINALLY take over. Then the Bees do their mask deal and change spot, with Brunzell coming in for a clothesline to Hoss. Jack breaks up an abdominal stretch and the Bees switch again, with a small package finishing Jack at 6:43.

Rating: C. Nothing to see here, with the Bees’ cheating continuing to be a weird way to go. It’s a total heel move but for some reason it was supposed to be cheered. I’ve never gotten that as it never felt right. Just a basic opener, though the fans didn’t seem thrilled with seeing the Bees cheat multiple times to win.

Magnificent Muraco vs. King Tonga

Mr. Fuji is here with Muraco. We’re clipped into somewhere in the match with Tonga grabbing a hiptoss and a slam to send Muraco scurrying (yes scurrying) outside. We get a shot of a young fan as Muraco comes back in for some stalling. A dropkick sends Muraco outside again before Tonga starts in on the arm. Muraco’s monkey flip doesn’t work (Johnny: “Oopsie doopsie doo!”) and the arm cranking continues.

Fuji trips Tonga/Haku (as commentary keeps switching between the names) down to take over before Muraco sends him outside for a cane shot. Back in and we hit the nerve hold as we might as well be counting down to the time limit draw. About five arm drops don’t go anywhere so Tonga fights up and wins a strike off.

Muraco avoids a charge into the corner though and the leg is wrapped around the post. Back in and Muraco stays on the leg, setting up the Figure Four. With that broken up, Muraco goes up but gets slammed down. Tonga strikes away and hits a clothesline, followed by a high crossbody, only for time to expire at 11:24 shown of 20:00.

Rating: C-. It’s not exactly the most interesting match in the first place and I can’t imagine what it was like to have it go on almost twice at long. Throw in the fact that they were pretty clearly just filling time until the ending and it was even weaker. They did a nice job of hiding the clips, but it wasn’t an entertaining match in the first place.

Ted Arcidi vs. Tony Garea

Arcidi, a power guy, shoves Garea around without much trouble to start. Garea’s running shoulders don’t work as Arcidi is mainly just standing there. An elbow drops Garea but he kicks Arcidi in the face. The dropkick puts Arcidi down but he’s right back with a bearhug for the win at 2:40. Arcidi was horrible and this showed it even more.

Jimmy Hart has Adrian Adonis ready to face the Junkyard Dog and Hart is ready to get his revenge.

Adrian Adonis vs. Junkyard Dog

Jimmy Hart is here with Adonis, who jumps Dog before the bell. Dog fights back with the chain and Adonis is busted open for some headbutts to leave him rocked early. Adonis is headbutted to the floor, where another headbutt staggers him again. Dog headbutts him on the apron and then shoves the referee, allowing Hart to spray Dog in the face with the atomizer. A middle rope elbow gives Adonis two as I guess the bell did indeed ring off camera. Adonis knocks him outside where Hart jumps on the Dog, only for Dog to pull Adonis down. They slug it out on the floor and only Dog beats the count for the win at 4:12.

Rating: D. This didn’t work so well and that shouldn’t be the biggest surprise. Adonis was still able to bump rather well but there was only so much that he could do with someone as slow as Dog. This was mainly Dog doing headbutts and then getting beaten up until the finish. In other words, a pretty usual Dog match for the time.

Dick Slater vs. Iron Mike Sharpe

A hammerlock sends Sharpe outside, which makes sense as he doesn’t want that bad arm to get even worse. Back in and Slater sends him right back to the floor as Monsoon calls out Sharpe on having a VERY slow healing injury, with the brace being on for eight years. Monsoon: “Why doesn’t he take the brace off and let it heal?” Johnny: “I DON’T KNOW! WHY DON’T YOU TAKE HIM OUT TO DINNER TONIGHT AND ASK HIM???”

Back in again and Sharpe gets in a shot but we’re clipped to Slater fighting back. Slater knocks him into the corner, followed by a swinging neckbreaker. The elbow misses so Slater goes with a middle rope elbow into a jackknife rollup for the pin at 2:29 shown. Nothing to this one, again, though Johnny snapping on Monsoon was funny.

Bobby Heenan promises to get the masks off the Machines tonight. Oh and Paul Orndorff is going to win the WWF Title. He also hates the crowd calling him WEASEL.

Bobby Heenan/King Kong Bundy/Big John Studd vs. The Machines/Captain Lou Albano

Ah the Machines. This would be Big Machine (Blackjack Mulligan) and Super Machine (Bill Eadie, better known as Ax) with Giant Machine (guess) in their corner. Studd and Super start things off but it’s too early for Super to get in a slam, as Studd’s thing was no one could slam him. The fans chant about a WEASEL as Studd knocks Super down to take over. Back up and Super knocks Studd to the floor, where the Giant sends him back inside. Bundy comes in to face Big and a collision goes nowhere.

Big slugs away and avoids a charge in the corner before knocking Bundy down so Studd comes back in. Studd stomps Big down and NOW it’s off to Heenan, who goes after the mask. A single shot from Super cuts him off but it’s Big being taken back into the corner. Studd’s cheap shot from the apron cuts Big down for two so it’s back to Heenan, only for Albano to get the tag. Heenan backs up (as only he can) before Albano whips him upside down in the corner. Everything breaks down and the Giant comes in for the DQ at 7:48.

Rating: D+. This was the usual slow motion match from the Machines and Bundy/Studd, though Heenan was there to make it better. It’s not a good match or really anything close to it, but what matters is they got something out of the crowd. The Machines were the definition of goofy fun, but it would be nice if they had something to back it up in the ring.

Jake Roberts vs. Ricky Steamboat

Snake Pit Match, which basically means street fight. Roberts jumps him on the way in but Steamboat gets in a backdrop to send Roberts outside. That lets them get their entrance gear off before Steamboat chops away back inside. Steamboat starts in on the arm as Monsoon says that we were originally supposed to have a real snake and a real dragon in the corners but the whole safety thing prevented it.

The hammerlock keeps Roberts down as Johnny can’t remember the lake near the stadium. Steamboat chops him to the floor but Roberts takes over and drops some knees, with Steamboat hanging over the ring’s platform. Roberts takes too long to get a chair though and Steamboat takes it away for a hard shot of his own.

Back in and the top rope chop to the head gives Steamboat two as the fans are staying with this. The armbar goes on again but Roberts manages to whip him over the top for a big crash to the floor. A catapult sends Steamboat into the post and we’ve got some blood. Back in and Roberts hammers away, with the short arm clothesline putting Steamboat down. The DDT is blocked so Roberts grabs a backbreaker for two, only to pose too much, allowing Steamboat to get a sunset flip for the pin at 10:18.

Rating: B. Easily the match of the night here so far, with the fans being in there the whole time. Steamboat is someone who could make a comeback as well as anyone else and having him steal the win at the end was the perfect way to go. It was a good most, with Roberts feeling like he was out to hurt Steamboat, who was wrestling at a higher level and picked up the win in the end.

Billy Jack Haynes vs. Hercules

It’s a Wrestlemania preview, with Monsoon on commentary alone for some reason and clearly doing a voiceover later. Haynes grabs a headlock and they trade leapfrogs until Hercules knocks him down. We’re clipped to Hercules grabbing a bearhug but Haynes headclaps his way out. They collide for a double down before Haynes elbows him in the face. A backbreaker looks to set up the full nelson but Hercules throws him outside instead. Hercules suplexes him back in and gets two off a clothesline. Haynes comes back with a quick backslide for the pin at 6:08.

Rating: C-. It’s not bad, but at the same time there is only so much you can get out of these two having such similar styles. Their bigger match at Wrestlemania wasn’t that much better and it’s mainly due to the clash of styles. You rarely see two people with the same style having a good match and that was on display here.

Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Dream Team

Another Wrestlemania preview and commentary (including Johnny, the Dream Team’s manager) is back. The villains jump them to start but the Rougeaus come back with a slingshot sunset flip for two on Valentine. Jacques drops a knee on Valentine and we hit the abdominal stretch (yes Monsoon complains).

With that broken up, Beefcake comes in for a powerslam and his own two. Raymond gets taken into the corner for a middle rope shot to the head. Raymond gets in a crossbody for two and it’s back to Jacques for a double dropkick. An atomic drop cuts Jacques off (and gives him a rather high pitched scream) so Beefcake can take him into the corner. Everything breaks down and the Rougeaus ram them into each other, setting up the Cannonball for two. Valentine sends Jacques into the apron as we go to a wide shot to show the crowd.

Jacques gets rammed into the apron again before Beefcake hits a big backbreaker on Raymond. A suplex gives Beefcake two and Valentine grabs a bearhug, with a tag to Jacques not counting. Raymond gets whipped hard into the corner but Valentine misses the big elbow. The hot tag brings in Jacques to clean house, including a double dropkick as Johnny is losing his mind. Jacques misses his middle rope elbow so Valentine slaps on the Figure Four. Raymond makes the save as everything breaks down and a sunset flip pins Valentine at 14:55.

Rating: B-. Another good match here, with the extra time helping a bit. They built things up with the heat on both Rougeaus and Johnny going absolutely nuts on commentary helped a lot. It made for a good match as the glory days of the tag division were coming soon, with the Rougeaus being a forgotten part of the lineup.

Johnny has to be held back in the commentary booth. To make things even worse, Monsoon points out that the wrong Rougeau got the pin, which has Johnny’s eyes bugging out in a funny bit.

Harley Race vs. Pedro Morales

This would have been a fascinating match a mere ten years earlier. We’re joined in progress with Morales throwing those big lefts to send Race to the floor. Race trips him down and sends him over the timekeeper’s table. The falling headbutt hits Morales again and a posting makes it worse. Back in and Morales hits a suplex and gets two off a small package. A sunset flip out of the corner gives Morales two but Race rolls him up and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin at 3:23.

Rating: C. Morales was great in his day but it just wasn’t working at this point. You could see that it wasn’t there anymore, even in a short match like this one. Race was able to make anyone look better though and he pulled it off again here, at least as much as you could given the circumstances.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff

Orndorff, with Bobby Heenan, is challenging and has the stolen Real American theme music. Since Hogan uses the same thing, they just let the song keep playing for both entrances. Orndorff jumps him before the bell and they roll around on the mat as the crowd is on fire. Hogan hammers away but the referee PULLS HOGAN’S HAIR to get him away. Dang it why can’t Jesse Ventura be on commentary here?

Back up and Hogan knocks him to the floor so Orndorff pulls Hogan outside for an exchange of rams into the apron. They get back inside where Hogan drops an elbow and an atomic drop sends Heenan into the corner. We pause for Hogan to go after Heenan, which is enough of a distraction for Orndorff to catch Hogan coming back inside. A big clothesline sends Hogan to the floor and there’s a suplex to drop him again.

Hogan starts to get back in, which Monsoon calls “guts personified”. We’re just over four minutes into a match where Hogan has been in control for a good chunk. Monsoon has a low standard for “guts personified”. Some elbows to the chest have Hogan in trouble on the apron and a rather hard one sends him to the apron.

Back in and Hogan gets dropped again so he reaches out to the crowd in one of those things that will always work. Orndorff hits a top rope right hand to the jaw but the piledriver is broken up. That earns Hogan a bite to the face and a belly to back suplex triggers the Hulk Up. A jumping knee sends Orndorff into the referee in the corner and Hogan holds up Orndorff’s arm for a clotheslines (how Orndorff turned on him). Hogan loads up a piledriver, which draws in Heenan with a stool to the back of the head. The VERY delayed cover gets….nothing as the referee calls for the DQ at 11:07.

Rating: B-. Another perfectly acceptable match here, with the ending designed to set up the rematches, which was one of the best house show runs the company has ever seen. Orndorff was a great change of pace heel for Hogan, who was best known for fighting the monsters. It was more in the Roddy Piper mold and that was certainly something Hogan could do very well. Not a great match, but the fans were eating it up.

Post match Orndorff puts the belt on and then freaks out at the announcement (as the referee appears near death in the corner). Orndorff stomps away but Hogan fights up and cleans house.

Slow motion replays and the credits take us out.

Overall Rating: C. The good matches are strong enough to carry this one to another level, but it’s still only so strong of a show. The problem is the bad matches really drag things down, as you’re not going to get much out of the midcard stuff here. What matters the most here is the massive crowd, which really is worth a look. Not a great show, but if you’re wanting to see what the company was doing in an era that is often forgotten, it’s worth a quick look.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania II
Date: April 7, 1986
Locations: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, New York City, New York/Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, Illinois/Los Angeles Memorial Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,585 (New York), 9,000 (Chicago), 14,500 (Los Angeles), 40,085 (Total)
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Susan St. James (New York), Gene Okerlund, Gorilla Monsoon, Cathy Lee Crosby (Chicago), Lord Alfred Hayes, Jesse Ventura, Elvira (Los Angeles)

This is basically three miniature shows combined into one big card. Each city would have its live action and then they would get to watch the shows from the other cities. It’s not the best idea in the world but like I said, there’s only so much they can do with the position they’re in. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon is in New York to welcome us to the show and introduce Ray Charles to sing America the Beautiful. As would become the custom, various images of American landscapes, military and run of the mill citizens are superimposed over the performance. Charles does an amazing rendition of the song and the fans give him the ovation he deserves.

Gene Okerlund is in Chicago to talk about the battle royal. By talk about I mean he mentions it and then throws it to the next interview.

Roddy Piper is ready for his boxing match and has trainer Lou Duva (who trained names such as Lennox Lewis and Evander Holyfield) in his corner. Piper says he’ll quit everything from wrestling to tiddlywinks to dating girls if Mr. T. can knock him out. He won’t quite Bob Orton of course. However, even if Mr. T. knocks him out, he’ll never, and I quote, “shave his head like an Indian and paint himself black.”

The Magnificent Muraco vs. Paul Orndorff

Muraco is a heel technician who was a very good hand in the ring. This is fallout from last year as Orndorff took the fall in the main event and Piper has sent Muraco to get some revenge. They trade slams to start and the crowd is already white hot. Orndorff is nice enough to make a slant eyes gesture at Muraco’s manager Mr. Fuji. Orndorff takes him down again as Susan St. James (an actress) is staying with this on commentary but clearly has almost no idea who these people are.

Paul cranks on the arm and my goodness Muraco is sweating quite a bit. We hit a wristlock, which St. James calls an ancient Chinese technique. At least she sounds happy to be here so I can excuse some of here bad lines. Muraco gets in a right hand and they brawl to the floor for a double countout at 4:10. The fans loudly swear at the result.

Rating: D. This had no time to go anywhere and I have no idea who thought this was the right way to open a show. I mean, it’s Wrestlemania. It’s ok to actually have a fall here instead of trying to set something up for later. The match wasn’t even any good and that’s not how you want to set the tone for one of the biggest shows of the year.

Mr. T. says he’s fighting for his friend the Haiti Kid, whose hair was cut by Piper and Orton. Fink’s announcement of the double countout drowns out a lot of his words.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Savage vs. George Steele

Steele, a crazy bald man with an incredibly hairy torso, is challenging and is totally in love with Savage’s manager Elizabeth. Savage debuted last year and has taken the company by storm, including taking the Intercontinental Title from Tito Santana earlier in the year. Randy goes to the floor to start before running again from Steele’s waving arms. He runs again and we’re waiting on the first contact nearly a minute in.

Savage isn’t fast enough this time though and George bites his leg as the champion tries to get back inside. Back in and Steele looks at Elizabeth, allowing Savage to hit him in the back and get two off a high cross body. That’s not a move you often see from Savage. Steele throws him to the floor so the champ crawls under the ring and comes around to the other side for a knee to George’s back. That’s fine with George as he bites Savage’s arm and takes over again.

Randy bails to the floor and finds a bouquet of flowers but George shoves them in his face. This is a really uneven comedy match so far and it gets even worse as Steele goes to eat a turnbuckle but opts to shove the stuffing in Savage’s face instead. Steele goes after Elizabeth at ringside, allowing Randy to ax handle him off the apron. Back in and the top rope elbow gets…..two? That’s a very, very rare kickout but it doesn’t matter as Savage rolls him up and throws his feet on the ropes to retain at 7:08.

Rating: D-. What the heck was that? I know Steele had been feuding with Savage for a long time but this was the best they could do for a major match? Total disaster here with the comedy not working and Savage just coming back and grabbing a win at the end. Savage winning was the right idea, but you could have cut a lot of the goofiness out of this to make for a better, or at least less bad match.

George eats another turnbuckle and chases the referee off.

Big John Studd and NFL player Bill Fralic talk trash before the WWF vs. NFL battle royal in Chicago. The announcement of Savage retaining in New York drowns out the yelling.

McMahon and St. James talk about the next match.

George Wells vs. Jake Roberts

Roberts is another newcomer and this is the high point of Wells’ career. George grabs a quick backdrop to start and Jake can barely stand up. They head outside (notice Jake sliding out like a snake) for more punishment to Jake, followed by a nice flying shoulder from George (ex-pro football player) back inside. Wells knocks him into the ropes but opts not to cover. A good looking powerslam gets two on Jake but he comes back with a thumb to the eye. Jake slides to the floor and gets George to chase him back inside, setting up the DDT for the pin at 3:08.

Rating: D+. This is probably the best match of the night so far and it’s just a step above a regular TV match. Jake was clearly going to be something interesting long term but he was still establishing himself at this point. Well could have been any given warm body here and that’s still a normal spot to have on these early Wrestlemanias.

Jake wraps the snake around Wells post match, making Wells foam at the mouth.

We recap Mr. T. vs. Roddy Piper, which started up again after Mr. T. won a boxing match on Saturday Night’s Main Event. Piper wanted to fight him next but Bob Orton helped Piper beat him down instead.

Out in Los Angeles, Hulk Hogan is ready for King Kong Bundy in the cage because he doesn’t like people who take shortcuts. This show is all over the place so far.

We introduce the celebrities for the boxing match. Comedienne Joan Rivers is guest ring announcer and introduces NBA star Darryl Dawkins, singer Cab Calloway and Watergate participant G. Gordon Liddy. Herbert, a character in Burger King commercials at the time, is guest timekeeper. There are no words to describe the drop from Liberace, Billy Martin and Muhammad Ali to…..this.

Mr. T. vs. Roddy Piper

Boxing match. Piper has Lou Duva as his trainer and Mr. T. has Joe Frazier. They circle each other to start with Mr. T. hiding behind his gloves and bobbing away from Piper’s punches. The referee keeps having to break up their brawls against the ropes and not a lot has happened so far. Both guys get in a few quick flurries before the first round wraps up.

Round two begins with Mr. T. claiming that Piper has a bunch of grease on his face. Mr. T. gets him into the corner and hammers away as these are clearly fake punches since both guys would be dead otherwise. Piper gets in some heavy rights in the corner and actually knocks him down to a big cheer from the crowd. Even more bombs have Mr. T. in trouble as the round ends.

Between rounds, Orton throws water at Mr. T. in the corner because he’s a villain like that. Mr. T. starts the round well as he basically shoves Piper down into the corner with some punches thrown in as bonuses. Roddy is up at eight so they shove each other, followed by a big left that clearly barely made contact but knocks Piper all the way out to the floor anyway. Back up and the round ends with little else happening.

Piper throws his stool at Mr. T. to start round four and they stand there trading bombs for a bit. Piper starts getting the better of it including a huge right hand that knocks out Mr. T.’s mouthpiece. Mr. T. does the same as St. James wants this to stop. As do the fans now as they’re cheering for Piper. With nothing else working, Piper slams Mr. T. down and it’s a DQ because of course it is.

Rating: D+. As fake as the punches clearly were, this was actually pretty entertaining at times due to how hard they were hitting each other. On top of that, I’ll take this over Mr. T. trying to wrestle again because that could have been an even bigger disaster. This was your standard boxing match on a wrestling show and that’s all they could have done here.

Off to Chicago. The ring looks much smaller here.

Women’s Title: Fabulous Moolah vs. Velvet McIntyre

Moolah is defending. McIntyre is an Irish wrestler who was one of the more popular women in the division in the 80s. Moolah hair drags her around to start but McIntyre comes back with some one footed dropkicks. Velvet misses a middle rope splash though and Moolah gets the pin at 59 seconds. It’s not entirely clear why this ended so fast but Velvet’s top might have snapped on that landing. You can definitely see Velvet adjusting her top which looks very loose. She gets out of the ring very quickly as well.

Nikolai Volkoff vs. Corporal Kirchner

This is a flag match meaning the winner gets to wave his country’s flag. Kirchner is considered one of wrestling’s all time toughest guys and would wind up wrestling in Japan under the name Leatherface. Volkoff throws him to the floor to start and posts the Corporal before biting his forehead. Back in and Kirchner hammers away (with the ring being VERY loud for some reason, as it was back in the same arena at the Wrestling Classic) but the referee goes down. With the distraction, Volkoff’s manager Freddie Blassie throws in his cane, only to have Kirchner intercept it and knock Volkoff out for the pin at 1:35.

Gene Okerlund does the ring introductions for the battle royal. This match has its own celebrities with Clara Peller (starred in Wendy’s ads) as timekeeper and Chicago Bears legend Dick Butkus and Dallas Cowboy Too Tall Jones as guest referees.

Battle Royal

WWF: Pedro Morales, Tony Atlas, Ted Arcidi, Dan Spivey, Hillbilly Jim, King Tonga, Iron Sheik, B. Brian Blair, Jim Brunzell, John Studd, Bret Hart, Jim Neidhart, Bruno Sammartino, Andre the Giant

NFL: Jimbo Covert, Harvey Martin, Ernie Holmes, Bill Fralic, Russ Francis, William Perry

I’m not going to bother listing off who most of these wrestlers are because most of them aren’t going to mean a thing here. As you can see, the NFL players are a bit outnumbered. Ernie Ladd, former football star and future WWE Hall of Famer, joins commentary in a smart move. It’s a wild brawl to start as is often the case in a battle royal. Covert saves Perry from elimination but is put out along with King Tonga a few seconds later.

Francis thinks it’s a good idea to go after Andre and only barely slides back in from the apron. Bruno dumps Holmes out and it’s Andre vs. Studd to a nice reaction. Someone eliminates Brunzell and the ring is starting to clean out a bit. Perry tosses Atlas to a BIG pop and then goes to fight with Studd. Morales and Martin go out at the same time and nearly get in a fight at ringside.

Arcidi is put out and Spivey is gone a few seconds later. There go Hillbilly Jim and Blair, followed by Fralic a few seconds later. Sammartino throws out the Sheik and we’re down to Andre, Francis, Studd, Sammartino, Hart, Neidhart and Perry. Things can finally slow down after several minutes of just random eliminations. Studd tosses Bruno and actually puts Andre down in the corner.

Perry EXPLODES at the Hart Foundation and knocks them out to the apron. The fans are all excited but Perry charges into Studd’s elbow and gets hiptossed out. Perry offers a handshake but suckers Studd in by pulling him out to the floor to get the people going all over again. Francis tries to fight the Harts by himself but eats a headbutt from Andre. A double dropkick ties Andre up in the ropes and Francis is easily tossed out.

So it’s Andre, Neidhart and Hart and I don’t see this going well for the normal sized guys. Andre kicks both of them out of the corner, grabs Neidhart by the beard, kicks him in the face and puts him out. Bret tries to come in off the top and gets tossed out with ease to give Andre the win at 9:03.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here and they made no secret of the fact that Andre was the obvious winner. The football players were really just a novelty so you could have a battle royal without looking like it was an easy way to get people on the card. They kept this short and to the point which helps things out quite a bit. Perry got the crowd going and Andre winning was the right call so no one is hurt here.

Back in New York, Piper says Mr. T. and William Perry are both cheaters. Piper denies cheating by shoving the referee.

Covert says he got cheated when someone jumped him from behind.

Iron Sheik says he proved wrestling is tougher than football.

We recap the end of the battle royal.

Tag Team Titles: British Bulldogs vs. Dream Team

The Dream Team is Brutus Beefcake/Greg Valentine and are defending. The Bulldogs are Davey Boy Smith (also known as the British Bulldog) and Dynamite Kid, who are managed by Lou Albano and have Ozzy Osbourne in their corner for no apparent reason. Even Gorilla doesn’t seem to know why he’s out there. Smith and Valentine start things off with Davey cranking on the arm.

It’s quickly off to Dynamite as things speed up, including a big shoulder to knock Valentine into the corner. Greg comes back with a suplex but Smith comes in to scare Valentine out to the floor. Back in and Valentin gets in a headbutt to the ribs and tags out to Beefcake for the first time. Beefcake is quickly press slammed and it’s back to Dynamite for a hard clothesline.

Brutus finally drags Davey off to the corner and makes the tag off to Greg, who comes in off the top with a forearm to the back. That’s some good heel tag team work and it’s as successful as always. Dynamite comes in anyway though and it’s time for some hard forearms and shoulders in the corner. A backbreaker gets two on Valentine with Brutus having to make the save. It’s not often that you see a tag match stay even this long but this was before the Rock and Roll Express vs. Midnight Express had created the classic tag team formula.

Valentine comes back with a piledriver (where he picked him up for a traditional version but kneeled forward like a tombstone) for two but he crotches himself on the Kid’s knees. Everything breaks down and the powerslam plants Valentine for two. Davey misses a charge into the post though and the champs start in on the arm.

A hammerlock slam and a top rope elbow onto the shoulder have Davey in even more trouble and Valentine gets two off a shoulder breaker. For some reason he pulls Smith up at two and Okerlund thinks it’s going to come back and haunt him. As he says this, Dynamite gets on the middle rope and sticks his head out. Smith rams Valentine head first into the Kid’s head, knocking Dynamite down onto the floor but knocking Greg out cold for the pin and the titles at 12:03.

Rating: B. Match of the night by far here with Dynamite taking one heck of a bump to end the match. The Bulldogs were a great team and they definitely deserved the titles and they did it in a tag match that went completely against the common tag team formula. Unfortunately it felt like it was much more about a way to get Osbourne on screen, which is only going to get worse.

Albano and Osbourne celebrate as the Bulldogs remember what planet they’re on. Kid can’t talk or stand as he’s still recovering from having being knocked off the middle rope and down onto the floor with no one to catch him. That’s a scary bump and it’s no shock that his body gave out on him so soon after this.

Vince and Susan talk about the title change and preview the main event.

The Los Angeles announcers (Jesse Ventura, Elvira, Lord Alfred Hayes) preview their section of the card.

Hercules Hernandez vs. Ricky Steamboat

Hernandez is better known simply as Hercules and is a big power guy as you would expect. Hercules jumps him from behind to start but Ricky comes back with a big chop. It’s time for the armdrags from Steamboat and he cranks on an armbar as is so often his custom. Back up and an elbow to the jaw drops Hercules and it’s off to the arm again. Hercules finally realizes that his name is Hercules and clotheslines Ricky’s head off before driving some hard knees into the side of his head.

There’s a Stun Gun for no cover as Elvira is proving to be the most worthless commentator of all time as she just babbles about how she’s never seen anything like this before. Hercules returns the back elbow to the jaw and gorilla presses Ricky twice in a row. Ricky raises his knees to stop a top rope splash (way out of character for Hercules) and finishes with the high cross body at 7:34.

Rating: D+. This was a standard power vs. speed match which could have been worse but still wasn’t anything worth seeing. Hernandez was a one dimensional wrestler which made him a good foil for someone like Steamboat who could mix up his offense enough to figure out a way around the power. It’s a fine match but really nothing out of the ordinary.

Uncle Elmer vs. Adrian Adonis

Adonis is a flamboyant guy in a pink dress and make-up while Elmer is a 400+lb hillbilly. They’re not exactly going with the high brow ideas here. Elmer attacks to start and sends Adrian to the floor with a single forearm. Adrian rips the ring skirt off and manager Jimmy Hart is beside himself. Elmer pulls Adonis to the apron and starts ripping off the dress. You knew they were going here eventually. A big punch to Elmer’s chest puts him down and Adonis takes off the dress to reveal regular trunks. Elmer comes back with a corner splash but he misses a legdrop, allowing Adonis to drop a top rope headbutt/splash for the pin at 3:04.

Rating: F. This is the kind of stuff I can’t stand in wrestling. Adonis and Elmer are two of the most basic, stereotypical characters they could have put together and it looks stupid. This catered to the lowest common denominator and that’s never the kind of wrestling you want to have. It doesn’t help that the match was awful.

Adonis puts a bow on Elmer’s back.

Hogan is ready to step inside a cage with King Kong Bundy after Bundy damaged his ribs a few months ago. All Hogan wants is for Bobby Heenan to try to get involved.

Funk Brothers vs. Junkyard Dog/Tito Santana

The Funks are Terry/Hoss (better known as Dory Jr.) and they’re managed by Jimmy Hart. Dog and Hoss get things going but Terry is quickly dragged inside so Dog can slam both brothers. Things settle down to Tito vs. Terry but both Funks are quickly dropkicked out to the floor. Back in again and it’s Dog ramming Terry’s face into the buckle several times as this has been one sided so far. It’s off to Dory vs. Tito with the Funks finally taking over but Tito comes back with the flying forearm for two.

Terry sends him out to the floor for some stomps from Hart and Elvira rants about how Hart needs to be ejected, sounding like someone who has never watched wrestling in her life. Back in and Tito reverses a suplex into one of his own as Elvira wants some trunks ripped off. Terry misses a legdrop and it’s off to the Dog for more headbutts. House is cleaned and Terry gets backdropped over the top. Dog slams him onto a table and busts up Terry’s leg. Everything breaks down and Terry blasts Dog in the head with the megaphone for the pin at 11:43.

Rating: B-. Fun match here with the Funks working very well together against the always entertaining Tito and the always charismatic Dog. It seemed that they were setting the Funks up as a potential challenge to the Bulldogs but they wouldn’t be around long. This was a nice tag match though and one of the best things on the card.

The announcers have an awkward chat as the cage is assembled.

To fill in some more time, we see King Kong Bundy attacking Hogan on a Saturday Night’s Main Event and injuring the champ’s ribs to set this up. It’s really not much of a storyline and it was only set up about a month in advance. With the talent they had on the roster (Savage, Roberts and Piper), this really is a questionable opponent for Hogan.

The doctor has recommended that Hogan doesn’t wrestle. As his ribs are being taped, Hogan puts a 100lb dumbbell around his neck and does chin-ups.

Bobby Heenan talks about how important a day this is for him because he’s going to get to pack the World Title in Bundy’s suitcase tonight. Bundy promises to send Hogan to the hospital all over again.

In New York, Susan St. James picks Hogan.

Time for the celebrities. Los Angeles Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda is guest ring announcer, actor Ricky Schroder is timekeeper and Robert Conrad is outside referee, meaning he won’t be doing much of anything.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy

Hogan is defending inside a cage (the big blue one in one of its earliest, if not the earliest, appearances) of course. Big pop for the champ as you would expect. They slug it out to start with Hogan knocking him into the ropes and nailing the big boot early on. This has already gone on longer than Bundy’s match last year. Hogan fires off a forearm in the corner which I don’t think I’ve ever seen him use before.

Bundy can’t ram him into the cage so he FINALLY goes after the taped up ribs. He slams Hogan to the mat and steps on his head as we go to an overhead shot. Hulk has to dive across the ring to keep Bundy from getting out so Bundy rams him back first into the cage. There goes the tape and Elvira is happy about more clothes coming off. Bundy chokes with the tape. Elvira: “He can’t do that can he?” Ventura is clearly getting annoyed at having to explain basic concepts like “there are no rules” to her over and over.

Hogan comes back with more right hands and sends Bundy face first into the cage to bust him open. Bundy gets choked on the ropes but Hogan, ever the moron, falls backwards trying a slam. That’s still not enough though as Hogan chokes with the tape, only to eat the big splashes that busted up the ribs in the first place.

We get the Hogan “fish out of the water” shaking but he still gets over to save the title again. Hogan gets all fired up again and powerslams Bundy (that’s very rare as it’s almost always a regular slam) before kicking him out of the corner. Heenan’s save fails miserable and Hogan climbs down (Elvira: “All right he’s gonna win!”) to retain at 10:18.

Rating: D+. It’s not a good match and Elvira made it insufferable but Hogan vs. a monster in the 80s is as much of a layup as you’re going to find in these early years. Bundy might have been considered a bigger threat back in the day but this felt like any given house show loop and a match that these two probably had a few dozen times around the country.

Hogan beats up Heenan and poses to end the show as Vince wraps it up from New York.

Overall Rating: D. There’s no way around it: this is one of the worst Wrestlemanias of all time. That being said, I always give this one a bit of a pass as they had no idea what they had with Wrestlemania or even pay per view in general. This felt like a bunch of house shows clipped down and edited together into one big one and that’s not the most interesting thing in the world. Hogan vs. Bundy is a very run of the mill main event but some of the tag matches are entertaining enough. The match is far more dull and lame than bad, but that doesn’t make it something fun to watch.

Ratings Comparison

Paul Orndorff vs. Don Muraco

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

George Steele vs. Randy Savage

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D-

Jake Roberts vs. George Wells

Original: F

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

Roddy Piper vs. Mr. T.

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

Velvet McIntyre vs. Fabulous Moolah

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Corporal Kirschner vs. Nikolai Volkoff

Original: D-

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Battle Royal

Original: B

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

British Bulldog vs. Dream Team

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B

Rick Steamboat vs. Hercules Hernandez

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

Uncle Elmer vs. Adrian Adonis

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: D-

2015 Redo: F

Tito Santana/Junkyard Dog vs. Terry Funk/Hoss Funk

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B-

Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy

Original: B-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Wrestlemania II is….weird. Like, really weird.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/09/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-2-what-the-hell-were-they-thinking/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/11/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-ii-three-times-the-suck/

Remember to check out my new forum at steelcageforums.com and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestling Challenge
Date: October 11, 1986
Location: Wicomico Youth & Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’ll do one more of these for now as the big feature from last week saw Roddy Piper vs. Adrian Adonis kicked into high gear. Other than that, there isn’t much going on as far as a major feud, with Hulk Hogan being nowhere to be seen (save for endorsing Honky Tonk Man) and Bobby Heenan wanting competition. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick welcome from the hosts.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming on the show.

Randy Savage vs. Billy Jack Haynes

Non-title and we’re starting with the big match for a change. Savage hides behind Elizabeth when Hayes comes at him to start, prompting Gorilla to call Savage a mouse. We get an inset interview from Elizabeth about how nice Savage is but Savage interrupts and runs her off. Haynes starts fast and knocks him to the floor where Savage needs a breather.

Back in and Savage grabs the rope to avoid a dropkick, setting up the top rope ax handle. They trade big clotheslines (Heenan liked Savage’s better) and Haynes drops a middle rope fist. The full nelson goes on but the referee gets bumped (that’s rare in 1986). Cue referee Danny Davis to DQ Haynes at 4:22.

Rating: C. This was a better match than you usually get on here, but what else were you expecting with Savage involved? Haynes is someone who had a great look but wasn’t really able to back it up with anything else. He looked solid enough in defeat here, but this was about the evil and nothing more, which isn’t the worst idea given how random of a match they had.

Say it with me: Monsoon is livid.

Ricky Steamboat is always asks what makes him mad and the answer is wrestlers who claim to need managers. He has been doing this for eleven years and hasn’t needed any help keeping track of his career. The reality is wrestlers needing help at ringside. Steamboat goes on about how he doesn’t like Jake Roberts and the DDT….and gets cut off by the music mid-sentence.

Bob Orton Jr. and Don Muraco (in something resembling a Roddy Piper costume) show us a clip from last week with the two of them and Adrian Adonis beating the daylights out of Roddy Piper.

In some new footage, we see Piper, with his knee in a huge brace and limping on a baseball bat, promising to take care of those sons of b****** (and yes it’s uncensored) and destroy the Flower Shop. Piper does just that, falling down multiple times, and promises that the war has just begun.

Orton and Muraco are happy that Piper will be limping for the rest of his life and are ready to ruin the rest of him. Then he will know that Orton carried him and that Muraco demands an apology. Piper had that fire in him and there isn’t much more intimidating than that in wrestling.

The Machines speak some Japanese (they all happen to be car manufacturers) and list off some teams they would like to face. Ichiban.

Killer Bees vs. Butch Cooper/Barry O

Blair takes Cooper to the mat to start and, in their insert interview, promise confusion through the powers of the masks. Barry O (the O is for Orton and he has a nephew named Randy) comes in and gets his arm cranked a bit but Brunzell gets pulled out of the air so Cooper can get in a single shot. It’s already back to Blair who cleans house before Brunzell finishes Cooper with a dropkick at 2:35.

Harley Race talks about how he has been the King since before he won the crown. Hawk (yes Hawk) Hogan comes up short to him and that’s why everyone was there when he was crowned. Just keep feeding him people, because he wants to hurt people. Sweet goodness that voice is awesome.

Hart Foundation vs. Mario Mancini/Nick Kiniski

Bret takes Nick (son of Gene) up against the ropes to start and a sunset flip gets two. We get an insert promo from the Harts, as they don’t seem to agree about how much they get alone. Nick armdrags Neidhart down and it’s off to Mancino, who gets taken into the corner. Heenan thinks that, save for Studd and Bundy, the Harts will be the next Tag Team Champions (yep). The Hart Attack finishes Mancini at 1:58.

Post match Danny Davis leaves before the losers leave, which has Gorilla, say it with me, livid.

We go to the Snake Pit and Jake Roberts brings out…..Hulk Hogan. Well that escalated quickly. Hogan doesn’t think much of a single python when he has two 24 inch Pythons. Roberts isn’t impressed but Hogan talks about being on the positive side of things instead of the negative like Jake. Roberts asks if he would ever turn his back on a man that he’s afraid of. Hogan says no and walks off in a pretty awesome moment.

Tito Santana/Pedro Morales vs. Ken Glover/Steve Lombardi

Santana armbars Lombardi (who is quite the brawler….from Brooklyn) and we get a quick insert promo from Pedro, who puts over Santana in Spanish. Pedro comes in and backdrops Lombardi before it’s off to Glover, who gets backdropped as well. The beating continues as Gorilla asks about all the money Heenan owes people for slamming Big John Studd. Before Heenan can answer, the atomic drop finishes Glover at 2:21.

Moondog Spot vs. Toma

Toma jumps over him to start and fires off a chop but misses an elbow. We get an insert promo from Billy Graham in the desert as Spot comes back with a suplex. Toma makes another comeback but Moondog Rex comes in for the DQ at 1:23.

Post match Haku comes in for the big beatdown as I try to get my head around the idea of the Islanders as faces. Toma is named as the winner, and for some reason his name was spelled as “Toma” before and “Tama” (the more common way it was spelled) after.

The Wizard, with Sika, shouts about wanting to hurt people. He has also found Kamala, who is ready to reach the thirty third level of communication. Anyway, Sika is a complete throwback to the old Polynesian warriors and threatens Hulk Hogan.

Overall Rating: C+. Maybe it was the people who appeared or maybe it was the lack of Junkyard Dog but this was one of the more enjoyable Wrestling Challenges I’ve seen so far. The show flew by and had some entertaining stuff throughout. Throw in Piper losing his mind as he wants revenge and this was quite the entertaining 45 or so minutes.

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: October 4, 1986
Location: Wicomico Youth & Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Last week’s show was certainly eventful as we had a debut, a near debut and two future stars working as jobbers. There’s nothing on the horizon at the moment but that means we can get some more time spent building up house shows for the time being. That alone should be fun so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Gorilla Monsoon and Luscious Johnny V. (the latter not speaking, as usual) welcome us to the show.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming on the show.

Harley Race vs. Allen Martin

Bobby Heenan is here with Race, hence him not being on commentary to start. We get an insert interview, with Race saying everyone should be taking a knee to him. Powerslam, suplex, middle rope knee drop, fisherman’s suplex and Martin is done at 1:12.

The Machines are unhappy about the lack of sushi, geisha girls and fried rice in American hotels.

Rougeau Brothers vs. Bob Bradley/Steve Regale

The Rougeaus clean house to start and we get an insert promo from the Rougeaus in French. Bradley is sent hard into the corner and Regale gets the same treatment. Raymond adds some nice looking slams but Bradley gets in a shot of his own. Not that it matters as Bradley misses a top rope splash and Le Bombe de Rougeau finishes him at 2:42. The Rougeaus were energetic enough and the finish looked great.

Corporal Kirchner talks about how he has been coming up the ranks and would love to get in the Intercontinental Title hunt. He is used to fighting in the swamps and yeah Miss Elizabeth is a distraction at ringside. She doesn’t have the Intercontinental Title though and he won’t be focusing on her. Kirchner sounded nothing like I was expecting and didn’t exactly sound serious here.

We get a clip of the showdown between Piper’s Pit and the Flower Shop. Bob Orton Jr. is asked which show is better and says it’s the Flower Shop, hands down. Piper looks on from the next set over before coming over to call Adonis ugly. He even goes so far to take Orton’s (pink) cowboy hat and slaps Adonis on the chest. Adonis is so flustered he can’t speak and we pan over to Piper’s Pit, much to the fans’ delight.

Piper thinks Adonis looks ridiculous and brings out Don Muraco, who was hosting the Body Shop in Jesse Ventura’s absence. Muraco doesn’t know what show he’s on so here is Adonis to insult the Pit. Piper takes out Adonis’ bra and Muraco says this is a cartoon. Muraco says Adonis can do what he wants but Piper goes into a rant about how he doesn’t wants his kids seeing Adonis.

Orton and Adonis come over and Adonis breaks a flower pot over Piper’s head. The other two hold Piper down so Adonis can wreck his leg with a chair. The Pit is torn down and Piper is left laying. Adonis even smears lipstick all over Piper’s face and you can feel the heat from this one. It was going to be a huge deal and egads Piper’s responses should be incredible.

The Rebel Dick Slater (complete with confederate flag) talks about how he is awesome and wants a title shot. Oh and he doesn’t like Paul Orndorff either.

Dick Slater vs. Tiger Chung Lee

We get an insert promo from Slater, talking about how much he loves the south and promises attitude adjustments. Slater drives him up against the ropes and grabs a headlock but Lee goes to the throat. Some right hands set up a sleeper but Slater is out in about 1.2 seconds. Slater slugs away, hits a top rope shoulder, and finishes with a top rope elbow to the head for the pin at 2:54. Slater could not be more of a cliché if he tried and it really didn’t work.

We go to the Snake Pit, with Jake Roberts bringing out Slick and Butch Reed. This leads to a rant about how natural Reed is on all counts and Roberts can’t find a flaw in him. So, he’s natural. Got it.

WWF has figures made by LJN! Sweet goodness I remember those things.

WWF has thumb wrestlers! Sweet goodness I remember those things.

Dream Team vs. Jerry Allen/Don Hastings

Valentine and Allen start things off with Valentine actually getting slammed down. We get an insert promo from the Dream Team, talking about how great their manager Johnny V. is going to be on commentary. Beefcake comes in and gets beaten down as well but referee Danny Davis cuts Hastings off for no apparent reason. After a heck of a rant from Gorilla, Beefcake hits a heck of a backbreaker and Valentine gets the Figure Four for the win at 2:45. Not quite a squash, but the Davis stuff is the most interesting part.

Junkyard Dog vs. Jimmy Jack Funk

Dog’s insert promo isn’t overly impressed with Funk. Dog slams him down to start but Funk is back with some right hands to take over. Funk misses a dive though and the headbutts knock him silly. Back up and Dog slugs away in the corner and hits a running clothesline, followed by a head knocker of all things. Funk punches away and Dog does the same before grabbing an abdominal stretch of all things. With that broken up, Dog finally finishes him with the Thump at 4:39.

Rating: D-. This was TERRIBLE, as it was little more than a bunch of punching, which didn’t look great either. Dog had been around for a bit but this was a time where he clearly wasn’t trying and it looked sad in a way. Granted there was only so much to be done here, but this was a chore to sit through, which says a lot in a match that wasn’t even five minutes long.

Dog dances with a kid after the match.

Bobby Heenan’s hand is tired from signing so many contracts for Harley Race and Paul Orndorff. He wants to face Hulk Hogan and the Machines but knows they won’t sign. Big John Studd and King Kong Bundy come in, with Studd introducing the two of them, with Bundy being happy over how many people he has injured. They’re ready for anyone.

Here’s who will be around next week.

Overall Rating: D+. That feature match dragged this one down a good bit. Even with the good enough promos and the squash matches working, you’re only going to get so far when the biggest thing you do (at least in the ring) is that bad. That being said, the Piper vs. Adonis stuff, while silly on the surface, has the potential to be a major breakout feud and I’m already looking forward to Piper’s response. Good show with a horrible match bringing it down.

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 27, 1986
Location: Wicomico Youth & Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re back with more of what WWE has released of the show and that means we could be in for something fun. The wrestling isn’t exactly high quality on here but it’s one of those shows that is so easy to watch and it makes for some entertaining stuff. There isn’t anything big on the schedule for the time being but Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff is still going very strong. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Gorilla and Bobby (who doesn’t speak) welcome us to the show.

Opening sequence.

Commentary runs down everyone on the show this week.

Koko B. Ware vs. The Gladiator

Ware gets an insert promo before the match, introducing us to his new parrot Frankie. Gladiator’s headlock doesn’t last long and he misses a shoulder to make it worse. Back in and we get a criss cross until Koko stops to do the Bird. A hiptoss puts puts Gladiator down and it’s time to work on the wristlock. Ware wins a slugout, with Heenan not liking all of the punching. Gladiator walks into a neckbreaker and the Ghostbuster (brainbuster) finishes him off at 2:52. This was not the best from Ware and things looked quite sloppy at times.

It’s time for Wrestler’s Rebuttal, featuring Slick, Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Sheik talking about how they can’t stand people around here.

Paul Orndorff vs. Lucius Brown

Orndorff comes out to Real American (there’s an angle that needs to be brought back) and has Bobby Heenan with him. As usual, the fans drive Orndorff crazy with the PAULA chants Brown starts fast but a leapfrog is countered into a hot shot. Orndorff sends him outside for a crash, followed by a clothesline back inside. The piledriver finishes Brown at 2:03. That landing must have messed with him pretty badly, as about a year later he would come back calling himself Virgil and working for Ted DiBiase.

Ricky Steamboat talks about getting pushed too far by Jake Roberts and wanting revenge. Steamboat came here to push himself and win a championship, which he might do down the line, but then he ran into someone like Roberts who wanted to do the same. Now Roberts did it with a DDT on the concrete floor, but next time it’s going to be Roberts going down.

Honky Tonk Man vs. Terry Gibbs

This is Honky Tonk’s in-ring debut and as he hammers away, we get an insert promo from Hulk Hogan talking about how great Honky Tonk Man really is. Gibbs gets in an elbow to the chest but Honky Tonk slams him off the top. There’s the backdrop and Honky Tonk’s straps come down, setting up another slam (he likes those). The top rope fist drop finishes Gibbs at 2:35.

Lanny Poffo mocks his own new haircut and talks about how many fans are buying the signed Frisbees. For now though, he has a poem about something important in the Special Olympics. It’s about how important it is for kids to be able to get back in the game and my goodness that was actually rather nice.

Butch Reed vs. Mike Kelly

Reed, with Slick, is billed as Mr. Natural (later THE Natural) in what might as well be his debut (he had wrestled the day before on Superstars). In another insert promo, Reed talks about how he’ll soon be the natural champion. Reed shoves Kelly around to start and knees him in the ribs to make it worse. A forearm to the face lets Reed pose a bit before pulling him up off a suplex. Reed finishes him with a gutbuster at 2:42. Thankfully Kelly’s gut wasn’t busted too badly, as he would go on to become Shane Douglas.

We go to the Snake Pit with special guests the Hart Foundation. Jimmy Hart says they are bad seeds before Jim Neidhart talks about how the snake eats a rat or a chicken. But could it perhaps eat a Killer Bee? The Harts think it might be hungry for a Rougeau or a Bulldog, with Jake talking about how you have to be hungry for what you want. They are the men that your mother always warned you about, the nasty boys. They said quite a bit here but what matters is they didn’t overstay their welcome like so many talk shows today.

We go to the Isle of Samoa, where the Wizard shouts about how Sika’s ancestors did various evil things year a thousand years ago. Sika comes up eating a fish and the Wizard wants a return to the days of cannibalism. So Sika is a fish? Oh and Sika is going to eat Hulk Hogan. So Sika is Hulk Hogan? And a fish? Then they go into the jungle, where Sika eats some plants. So Sika is….I give up. Then they go to a fire as Wizard keeps talking about how evil Sika can be and Sika eats something else. This went on for a long time and they got the point across with the first of the three segments.

Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff vs. British Bulldogs

Non-title and Slick/Freddie Blassie are here with Sheik and Volkoff. After the Russian national anthem, we’re ready to go with Sheik driving Bulldog up against the ropes. It’s off to Volkoff to choke Dynamite in the air (with one hand for some rather impressive power) and then send him into Sheik’s raised boot. Dynamite suplexes his way to freedom though and it’s Bulldog coming back in for the suplexes. Bulldog tries another suplex but Slick sweeps the leg so Sheik lands on top for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: C. That’s quite a weird thing to see on one of these shows and it certainly came out of nowhere. The cheating protects the champs and likely sets up a series of house show title matches, but dang that is weird to see for 1986. At the same time, it’s kind of amazing how long Sheik and Volkoff were a team. They were together at Wrestlemania I and still together two years later at Wrestlemania III, which is a good while longer than I had realized.

Slick talks about buying half of Freddie Blassie’s contracts so he could be the first black manager. There are no wrestlers more talented than Iron Sheik, Nikolai Volkoff and Hercules Hernandez (not here). Volkoff talks about how much better things are now that Slick is here and Sheik calls Slick, and I quote, “a rare honest black man.”

The preview for next week and a highlight package take us out.

Overall Rating: C-. I know the wrestling isn’t very good and it doesn’t feel like anything of note happens around here, but sweet goodness it’s fun to get away from everything moving at a breakneck pace on modern shows. This is quick, to the point stuff and helps get the wrestlers over to make them seem more important. It’s such a fun show and I could go for a lot more of it, which will certainly be the case.

 

 

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WWF House Show
Date: June 27, 1986
Location: Boston Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 14,348
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund

Welcome to “I feel like watching some 80s wrestling”, as we have a house show from almost three months after Wrestlemania II. This is a bit of a strange time for the WWF, as Hulk Hogan is ruling the world and there are good feuds beneath him, but he is going to need a big challenger to come after the title. That might be taken care of tonight. Let’s get to it.

Gorilla and Gene welcome us to the show and run down the top of the card.

Based on cards I can find, this show is not in the same order that it aired, but I can’t imagine it makes that much of a difference.

Les Thornton/Tiger Chung Lee vs. US Express

Unfortunately this is the Dan Spivey version of the Express. Thornton and Rotundo start things off and Thornton drops him with a running shoulder. Rotundo pulls him down into a headscissors as Gene talks about a recent golf outing. With that broken up, it’s off to Spivey to headlock Lee over. Spivey grinds away a bit but Lee gets in a shot of his own, allowing Thornton to come back in. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Spivey powers up, only to get caught in a front facelock.

Commentary talks about some of the great teams at the moment, including Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff and George Steele/Junkyard Dog. I question commentary’s definition of “great” as Spivey gets taken down again. Lee comes in for a slam, only to get slammed off the top for his efforts. Rotundo comes in to finally pick up the pace, including a legdrop between Lee’s legs.

We lose the camera feed for a bit before coming back to Lee driving Rotundo into the corner so things can slow right back down. Thornton grabs a chinlock until Rotunda fights up, only to have Lee offer a distraction so the tag doesn’t count. Rotundo finally kicks him away and brings in Spivey for the house cleaning. A backdrop into a jumping elbow gets two but Lee gets dropkicked out to the floor. Back in and it’s Rotundo getting caught in the corner AGAIN as this match just won’t end. This beating doesn’t last as long as it’s back to Spivey for the bulldog to finish Thornton at 12:17.

Rating: D. Oh sweet goodness this was boring and I have no idea why it went on this long. It’s a match where you could cut the time in half and do the same thing that much better. The Spivey version of the Express didn’t work out very well and you could tell that the team was on the downside here. The action was slow and uninteresting and I was begging for it to end, making the last five minutes rather awful. Terrible choice for an opener.

Tony Atlas vs. Harley Race

Race has only been around here full time for about a month and a half now. They trade headlocks to start, with Atlas grinding him down to his knees. Back up and Race tries a headbutt but goes down to the power of racial stereotypes. We’re right back to the headlock but this time they fall outside, with Atlas being knocked over the barricade.

Atlas takes his sweet time coming back inside so Race suplexes him back in for two. Back up and Atlas grabs a suplex of his own, only to miss an elbow. Race puts him down with a swinging neckbreaker and drops some elbows. A dropkick gets Atlas out of trouble and a middle rope headbutt puts Race down again. The splash hits knees though and a sunset flip finishes for Race at 8:27.

Rating: C-. Well, it was better than the opener, at least partially because it was a bit shorter. Atlas came off as confused more than anything else, as he spent a lot of time standing around, allowing Race to either move or block it. Race is of course able to have a good match with just about anyone and he was holding it together until they finally just stopped.

King Tonga vs. Pete Doherty

Tonga is the future Haku/Meng and is currently owed $50,000 for slamming Big John Studd, which he does not seem likely to collect. Doherty is a local heel who was a bit of a mainstay around Boston and even did commentary on some of these shows. Tonga powers him around to start and Doherty is complaining about a non-existent hair pull.

Back up and Tonga kicks him away before glaring Doherty off for trying a ram into the buckle. Doherty has a breather on the floor before coming back inside to miss a charge in the corner. Tonga hammers away and hits a dropkick, followed by a superkick. A flying headbutt finishes Doherty at 4:20.

Rating: C. This was little more than a squash as Tonga ran over him and Doherty got in a grand total of nothing. That being said, that’s kind of the point of someone like Doherty, who was never going to be any kind of a threat to anyone. Tonga was at least a more interesting star and someone who moved around better than almost anyone else on the show so far, though that isn’t a high bar to clear.

Moondog Spot vs. Pedro Morales

They lock up as Gorilla talks about his matches with Bruno Sammartino here in the Garden. Morales starts fast with some backdrops and Spot needs a breather. We pause for Spot to yell at the fans before he grabs a not exactly cranked on headlock. Morales breaks that up without much effort and they stare at each other a bit more.

Spot gets in a shot of his own though and the chinlock goes on. Said chinlock is about as lazy as you can imagine but it stays on for a good while. Morales fights up and gets a sunset out of the corner for no count, allowing Spot to punch him in the face. Not that it matters as Morales small packages him for two, followed by an O’Connor roll for the pin on Spot at 7:27.

Rating: D. Is the WWF mad at Boston for some reason? There have been four matches so far and the best one has been ok at best. Morales is a legend and the fans are going to respond to him, but how interested can you get in a few punches and some rollups? Spot was even worse though, making this another lame match in a show long series of them so far.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Jake Roberts

Ok this HAS to be better. Steamboat chases him to the floor and the fight starts out there as they don’t quite like each other. They get back inside with Steamboat being sent inside but easily blocking a DDT attempt. With Roberts on the floor again, the referee almost hits Steamboat, with commentary NOT being happy with such an action.

Back in and Steamboat sends Roberts into the corner and is rather fired up. Roberts gets tied up in the ropes and hammered some more, only to break free and drop Steamboat with a hard right hand. A clothesline and a heck of a whip into the corner have Steamboat down and Roberts says hit him. Not one to be rude, Steamboat slugs away but gets punched down again as Roberts wants to box.

Steamboat is knocked through the ropes and barely hangs on from crashing out to the floor. Back in and Roberts grabs the sleeper, which he switches into a chinlock to avoid drowsiness. With Steamboat fighting up, Roberts slams him down and hammers away some more. The referee breaks that up as well and commentary still isn’t pleased.

It’s time for the snake but it takes too long, meaning Roberts has to try/miss a running knee lift. A neckbreaker drops Roberts again and Steamboat does it a second time for a bonus. Back up and Roberts hits the knee lift, sending Steamboat outside again. Roberts follows him out but gets posted and sent inside….as Steamboat is counted out at 13:28.

Rating: B. I’m not sure if it was the anger between the two of them or the fact that the show has been so dull until now but this was a rather good match. They were beating each other up and Roberts felt like he was tormenting Steamboat and trying to hurt him at the same time. On the other hand you have Steamboat getting ticked off and fighting back, which is something he does rather well in his own right. Rather strong stuff here, as most of their feud wound up being.

Post match Steamboat stays on him, even sending Roberts into the barricade to bust him open. Back in and the referee has to drag Steamboat off so Roberts can escape.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

Hogan is defending and Savage’s (with Miss Elizabeth) Intercontinental Title (which he isn’t carrying) isn’t on the line. Savage jumps Hogan from behind and gets in a belt shot to the back to start rather fast. The top rope ax handle has Hogan in more trouble but Liz gets up on the apron for some reason, allowing Hogan to pop up and start throwing the right hands.

Hogan even takes Savage’s sunglasses and hammers away while wearing stolen property. Savage is sent outside and rammed shoulder first into the post to keep him in trouble. Back in and Hogan drops him again as the fans are rather pleased with these happenings. Liz runs to the back for some reason as Hogan chokes Savage in the air to make it worse.

Hogan hits a suplex and Savage’s arm gets tied in the ropes. That’s fine with Hogan, who bites away (what a monster), only to get sent outside. Savage comes off the top with an ax handle to the floor, allowing Hogan to adjust his trunks a bit. Back in and Savage hits the top rope elbow (to no reaction from commentary) for two, as it’s Hulk Up time. All of the usual sets up the legdrop to retain the title at 7:13.

Rating: C+. Stolen property and attempted cannibalism aside, this wasn’t exactly a classic but Hogan vs. Savage is always worth a look. The most telling part though was the non-reaction to the top rope elbow, as the Intercontinental Champion hitting his finisher had almost no chance of beating Hogan. That’s how big Hogan was at this point and it was rather telling for what was going to be the reality of this feud for, well, ever.

Post match Adrian Adonis comes in to beat on Hogan, who fights off both villains (Adonis’ bra is exposed). Hogan even takes Adonis’ wig as the parade of thefts continues. A lot of posing ensues.

Moondog Rex vs. Billy Jack Haynes

They take their time before locking up, with Haynes grabbing a headlock to take over. Rex powers up and gets in a cheap shot in the corner, only to have the referee block another one so Haynes can take over (commentary still isn’t pleased). Haynes grabs a chinlock with a knee in the back (a rare sight from the good guy), which is broken up with a quick belly to back. A backbreaker stays on the back as Haynes starts staggering around. Rex grabs his own chinlock before missing his own elbow, allowing Haynes to slug away. A dropkick….I think misses Rex (now busted open a bit), but Haynes slaps on the full nelson for the win at 6:08.

Rating: C-. It was better than the other Moondog match, but there were a few parts there where they didn’t quite seem to be on the same page. Haynes was a decent power guy with a good full nelson but there is only so much that he could do. At least it was short, which is rarely a high compliment for any match and it isn’t here either.

King Kong Bundy vs. Junkyard Dog

Bundy bails from the threat of a chain because, you know, it’s a chain. Gorilla says we’re in for a classic, suggesting that he doesn’t know the definition of the word “classic”. They hit the stall button for over a minute before Bundy drives him into the corner for a clean break (though the referee yells at Dog for a bit). Bundy knocks him down but misses the elbow, allowing Dog to fire off the elbows to the head.

After a quick trip tot he floor, Bundy comes back in so he can win a slugout. The splash misses but so does Dog’s headbutt as we’re getting some trash thrown inside. Bundy takes him into the corner for a short form splash, plus a chain shot to the ribs as more trash is coming in. More choking ensues as the referee takes some trash to the head.

Dog slugs back, reaches for the missing chain, and then punches some more. Dog finally grabs the chain and Bundy bails, leaving the referee to yell at Dog again. The chain is put back in the corner and they lock up again. Bundy pulls the chain in but gets headbutted, leaving Dog to toss the referee with the chain for the DQ at 7:39.

Rating: D. Not only was it a bad match, but the fans completely gave up on it about halfway through. Throw in a bad ending (along with the trash) and this was just horrible. I’m not sure what was going on here but it really didn’t work in the slightest. It’s so strange to see the fans rebel against a match like that, though it’s kind of hard to argue against in this case.

Post match Dog beats up the referee again, including a Thump (powerslam). Commentary REALLY is not pleased here as the oddness continues.

Magnificent Muraco vs. Paul Orndorff

Rematch of the Wrestlemania II opener. Fuji goes over to say something the microphones can’t quite pick up on commentary as the referee gets some of the trash from the previous match out of the ring. They fight over a lockup and break it up against the ropes as this feels like they’re taking their time. Muraco shoves him away as we’re already over two minutes in.

Some knees to the head and ribs have Orndorff in trouble and a Hennig neck snap of all things makes it worse. Orndorff knocks him to the floor for a breather though and Muraco is perfectly fine with hitting the stall button again. Back in and Orndorff starts working on the arm as we hear about his football career. The arm cranking goes on for a bit as they might as well have the clock counting down to the time limit draw on one of the advertisement boards.

More trash comes in (and is kicked out much faster this time) as Orndorff keeps the armbar going. The arm cranking reaches about three straight minutes so Gene talks about people he met on a recent flight. Muraco FINALLY fights up and sends him into the corner, setting up….a nerve hold.

Back up and Muraco sends him into the corner again, setting up another nerve hold as you can hear the fans getting REALLY fed up. One piece of trash can be seen sailing in and almost hitting the camera as this is deserving all of the anger it gets. Orndorff fights up and hammers away, accidentally showing some life in this mess. A top rope elbow to the head and an elbow drop have Muraco in trouble and the slugout is on. Orndorff grabs a small package for two as the 20 minute time limit expires at 15:11.

Rating: F. Orndorff showed some fire at the end but this was two guys going out there and more or less taking the main event off after an already horrible show. This was terrible and made me want to see their already bad Wrestlemania match again, as they weren’t trying and made no secret whatsoever about it. Just dreadful

The referee says Orndorff wins and commentary goes off about how little sense that makes, even calling it a “miscarriage of justice” to show you how serious they really are.

Overall Rating: D-. When the third best match of the night is a King Tonga squash, you know you’re in serious trouble. Roberts vs. Steamboat was rather good and Hogan vs. Savage was fun enough, but that is the grand total of anything you might want to see on a show that runs almost two hours. The fans throwing so much trash into the ring that the referee can’t get rid of it fast enough tells you everything you need to know here, as this was one of the worst house shows I’ve ever seen and most of the people involved should have felt embarrassed by what they did out there. They won’t, but they should.

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 20, 1986
Location: Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Ernie Ladd, Johnny V

I’m not sure what to expect from this show and that is what makes the show so much fun. Instead of one big story, it’s more like they’re picking random wrestlers who have a little something going on at the moment and throw them into some squash matches. That’s how things worked in the Golden Era so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick host intro.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming this week.

Hart Foundation vs. Islanders

This is when the Islanders were still good guys and Jimmy hart is in the Harts’ corner. Of note: the graphics say this include “Hako” and “Brett” Hart. The Harts jump them to start and clear the ring until it’s Neidhart kneeing Tama in the ribs. There’s a bite to the face as Johnny V makes south Pacific jokes.

Something like a Demolition Decapitator drops Tama again as we get an insert promo from Jimmy Hart about how much better his team is than the Islanders. The referee doesn’t see the tag to Haku so everything breaks down, with the barricade being knocked down at ringside. Toma busts out a crazy dive over the top (In 1986!) and the referee throws it out at 2:39, which is a bit of a surprise.

Post match the Islanders clean house without much trouble.

This week’s Wrestler’s Rebuttal is from Adrian Adonis, who is ready for his debate with Roddy Piper in the coming weeks. The topic: who has the better talk show segment. So they’re talking about talking? This isn’t so much a rebuttal as much as a clip from Superstars.

Randy Savage vs. Tony Garea

Non-title and AGAIN Danny Davis messes up by distracting Garea. Not that it matters as Garea is right back with a crossbody for two and a sunset flip for the same. Back up and Savage knees him out to the floor, setting up the top rope ax handle. We get an insert promo from Billy Graham in the desert, where he says he’s coming back to hurt someone. Like Savage for example. Savage takes him back inside, hits the slam and drops the elbow for the pin at 2:26. Garea got in a bit there but then it was the Savage Show, meaning it was awesome.

Jake Roberts thinks Ricky Steamboat is stupid for coming after him after getting burned once before. And no, he didn’t get the Snake Pit by brown nosing, but because he has talent.

Machines vs. Tiger Chung Lee/Al Navarro/JJ Jackson

Oddly enough, Hayes doesn’t know Jackson’s name and has to ask him. Lou Albano is here with the Machines: Big Machine (Blackjack Mulligan), Super Machine (Ax from Demolition) and Giant Machine (I’ll let you figure it out). Lee and Big start things off as we get an insert promo from Bobby Heenan talking about how much smarter he is than Albano, who must have a machine for these machines. Jackson comes in and gets clotheslined by Super, who sends him into a right hand from Giant for the pin at 1:30. This team is hilarious in a way that would only work in wrestling.

Koko B. Ware, with music box blaring, gets Ken Resnick to dance with him. He is no stepping stone.

BUY WWF MAGAZINE!

BUY LJN ACTION FIGURES! No really, as those things are valuable today.

BUY WWF THUMB WRESTLERS! I think I had most of those.

Dream Team vs. Lanny Poffo/Dick Slater

That’s a heck of a random jobber team and oddly enough they get a full entrance while Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine are already in the ring. Poffo’s poem is about how Slater is a rebel from Dixie who will do his thing. Valentine slams Poffo to start as we get an insert promo from Mr. Fuji, who does NOT like Dixie. Slater comes in and elbows Valentine in the head for two.

That’s enough for Johnny V, the Dream Team’s manager, to bail on commentary and go take care of his team. A suplex gets two on Slater and a sunset flip gives him two on Valentine. Everything breaks down and Valentine snaps Poffo’s throat across the top rope so Beefcake can get the pin at 2:35. The V stuff made it a bit more interesting.

And now, the Snake Pit with Bobby Heenan and Paul Orndorff. Jake talks about fakers and Orndorff says Hulk Hogan wants to be him. The robe comes off so Orndorff can pose, with Heenan saying Orndorff’s thirst will only be quenched when he wins the WWF Title.

Sika vs. Rick Hunter

The Wizard is here with Sika. Hunter slugs away to start and gets choked down with no effect. Sika slaps him down and we get an insert interview from Honky Tonk Man, who is still on his way. Hunter tries to forearm his way out of trouble and gets choked into the corner. More choking ensues as the Wizard shouts at Sika, who finishes with the Samoan drop (with Sika more laying him down than dropping) for the pin at 3: 23.

Rating: D. When the Samoan drop isn’t looking great, there is only so much that you’re going to get out of a match. Sika was never much on his own but was quite great when he was part of the Wild Samoans. That being said, this was another weak match which got some time, partially due to Honky Tonk Man sucking any life out of the thing with his out of date good guy act.

Video on the Rougeau Brothers riding motorcycles and in a boat. Riveting.

Killer Bees vs. Terry Gibbs/Jack Foley

Ladd thinks the Bees have ants in their pants and Monsoon thinks the Dream Team is scared to put their “John Henry” on a contract with the Killer Bees. Brunzell and Gibbs trade wristlocks to start before it’s off to Blair. Gibbs misses a running elbow so Jack comes in, only to get fireman’s carried.

This lets Johnny get in another “Iwo Jima, out of ammo” line, which must have some other meaning. An atomic drop and jumping knee drop Jack and a double elbow does the same. The arm work continues as Ladd refers to the Dream Team as the “Dream Machine”. Johnny keeps talking about how ugly Foley is and a flying hip attack gives Blair the pin at 3:31.

Rating: D+. Another slow and nothing match, with commentary sounding WAY off being the main focus. There were all kinds of tag teams around this time and the Bees, while good, weren’t exactly going to stand out when the British Bulldogs and the Harts etc. were around. They were a big enough deal here and felt like something of stars. That being said, the Jack guy would get a bit better when he started going by something closer to his real name: Mick. Yeah I know it’s not much of a secret, but I need something to get me through these matches.

Bobby Heenan says Mr. Wonderfulmania is running wild and Paul Orndorff comes in to talk about how jealous Hogan is. Hogan can’t lift like him so he stole Real American and the t-shirt ripping. Heenan chants WONDERFUL to wrap things up.

Here’s who’s coming next week.

Cue that musical review!

Overall Rating: D+. Randy Savage can only give you so much on a show with almost nothing else. The Harts vs. the Islanders felt like it could have had potential but then nothing came of it due to time. The Machines are always good for a chuckle, but I need a little more than the rapid fire short matches with almost nothing worth seeing. Still though, this is about as straight up my alley as I can get so we’ll definitely be back.

 

 

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