Monday Night Raw – January 4, 1999: My Favorite Moment Ever In Wrestling

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 4, 1999
Location: DCU Center, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 10,668
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is the second half of our double feature I guess you’d call it. I just got done posting the Fingerpoke of Doom show. This is the Raw from the same night which of course features Mankind winning his first world title. The rest of the show is more or less forgotten and since this is my favorite moment in the history of wrestling I just wanted to do this show. Let’s get to it.

A video about the career of HBK opens the show. He had recently been fired as Commissioner by Vince so this is kind of a goodbye thing. Vince yells to cut the video, so we cut to the arena to see the Corporation coming to the ring. There is a lot of talent in there to put it mildly. Oh and Test is there too. Vince talks about how Shawn humiliated his son and if anyone does that again, they have to deal with Vince.

A live shot of Shawn coming to the arena is shown on the screen, and there’s the music. Not sure what the point of the video was since he was there seconds later. He has the cavalry with him, and it’s DX. And by that, I mean the REAL DX: HHH, X-Pac, Chyna and the Outlaws. This team with Shawn is a weird visual but cool at the same time.

According to Shawn he’s still the Commissioner because the contract is iron clad and Vince said the Commissioner answered to no one, including Vince. Shawn says the only way he leaves is if he resigns, which more or less set up the Vince makes Shawn’s life a living nightmare angle. We see a clip of Vince drawing his number for the Rumble and he wanted #2. Shawn therefore grants his wish, setting up one of the worst Rumbles of all time. He also promises Vince a surprise for later in the night, which will drive him Stone Cold Crazy.

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

By the way, Cole is somehow more of an annoying douche here than he is now.Shamrock is the IC and a tag champion here but this is nontitle. Ken was in the ring for the opening segment but had a regular entrance for no apparent reason. It’s a striking contest to start with Blackman taking over. We hear about Billy Gunn feuding with Shamrock, more or less giving away the ending.

Dan Severn, in a neck brace, comes down. He used to be both UFC Champion and NWA Champion at the same time. It’s so weird hearing about UFC on WWF TV. His mustache on his own could probably win the IC Title. It’s that awesome. Dan and Shamrock were big rivals in UFC so there’s the reason. Shamrock hits his belly to belly which is more of a throw than anything else. Severn pops up on the apron and Billy Gunn runs down for a Fameasser to Shamrock, giving Blackman the pin. Predictable but fine.

Rating: N/A. Not about the match or anything as this was just for the angle. That’s perfectly fine and is a common practice in wrestling today still. Blackman was just boring to put it mildly, but he was trying at least. The Attitude Era was known for having a point to everything, and this had about three angles going at once, which is average for the time.

Gunn and Shamrock are fighting in the back.

Here comes Mankind for no apparent reason. He doesn’t have his far more famous music yet either. Foley beat up Shane last week apparently. Foley: “I swear that was the first time I’ve ever grabbed another man’s testicles.” He’s just awesome at this point with his promos as he’s a clueless putz that seems to find himself in the top feuds in the company but everyone loves him and he can back it up. It was just out there all the time, but it worked like a charm.

He wants a shot at the Rock and the Title at the Rumble. We get an I Love Lucy reference as he says that’s what the fans want. He corrects the fans by saying he’s not God but he’s good. Foley beat Rock at Rock Bottom but Vince changed the decision. Vince comes out and blames Foley for blaming the fans. He says Foley hasn’t paid his dues and no more title shots for him.

Vince makes HHH vs. Foley tonight with the winner getting a spot in the Rumble. We see a clip of Foley beating up Shane, and Shane is announced as the guest referee. I knew that before it was said. There was a hardon for guest refs around this time so it was pretty clear that was coming.

Chyna and her friend Sammy are here.

Mark Henry vs. Goldust

Henry is sexual chocolate here and wants Chyna. How weird is it that these two are still employed? Goldie is still a bit insane here unlike now when there is nothing special about his character in the slightest. Goldust goes to the legs because that’s what you do against every big man you ever fight. Just as always, it doesn’t work.

Henry more or less dominates, hitting a big elbow drop. A press slam drop ends Goldie’s comeback and here are Chyna and Sammy on the stage. This allows Goldust to hit Shattered Dreams, which is of course a DQ.

Rating: D. This was just a waste of time and did nothing but set up the angle that’s about to happen. Goldust didn’t really mean much at all and Henry was in this whole thing with Chyna. You got a lot more pointless matches like these at this time, but it was a far more angle heavy period of time.

Sammy and Chyna get in and Chyna has something to say. The other night with him was incredible, but she’s not enough woman for him. She introduces him to her friend Sammy. Chyna makes the inevitable offer, and Henry faints. I’m not sure if this ends tonight, but the payoff for this is BAD. Apparently it doesn’t but Sammy is a transvestite. Gotta love Russo!

Jesse Ventura is governor of Minnesota. That’s still insane. His line at the inauguration: “We shocked the world.” Amen. Also for you REALLY old school fans, Terry, Tyrell and Jade are here, more commonly known as his wife, son and daughter. Just in case you never got those references.

Dennis Knight (soon to be Mideon) is in a dungeon, chained to the ceiling with various metal objects hanging around and laying on the floor. Sure why not?

Godfather vs. Test

Test is in the Corporation, which would change later. He had just debuted recently before this as a hired gun. Ho Train hits and Test is in trouble. Val Venis comes out as Test hits a big boot. Godfather and Test fight on the floor and the referee just throws it out for no apparent reason. Val runs down and brawls with Test. This whole thing took like 2 minutes.

DX is talking.

Mankind vs. HHH

Winner goes to the Rumble. Shane is guest referee. HHH works on the arm as Cole is REALLY annoying already. This is going to be short. Foley hits a baseball slide to put HHH down. HHH gets a sunset flip but Foley grabs the ropes. Shane kicks his arm and makes a fast count to end it. Like I said it was short, as in like 2 minutes.

HHH apologizes but says business is business and a win is a win. To avoid thoughts of a heel turn he gives Shane a Pedigree before saying to Foley that Shane is all his. Mankind says this is something my high school coach taught me. He more or less puts Shane in an abdominal stretch while sitting down. Foley says he’ll break Shane’s shoulder if Vince and the Stooges, who have just come out (ok not in Patterson’s case but 2/3 isn’t bad), come any closer. He wants a title shot TONIGHT and makes Shane screams. Vince agrees but Foley wants No Disqualifications. It’s on, and Rock comes out to yell at Vince.

Slam of the Week is X-Pac getting kicked in the head by Bossman.

We recap what just happened.

Edge vs. DLo Brown

Edge has only been around about 6 months at this point and still comes through the crowd. I LOVED this guy back in the day and did for a long time. Brown and Henry have been having issues with PMS, so expect a run in here. No bell here as we just get going. Big plancha to the floor by Edge which has no effect for some reason.

Liger Bomb to Edge doesn’t get a cover as D’Lo has to play to the crowd. Very nice top rope cross body from Edge gets two. Here’s PMS as has been a theme tonight. Terri is pregnant but won’t say who the father is. D’lo accidentally knocks her to the floor and she holds her stomach. This would result in Brown being their slave more or less. I hated this stable, as did most people. The match just ends.

Rating: C+. This was a fun match as Brown was always solid in the ring and Edge was AWESOME when he debuted. This was a great pairing and I’d love to see them go at it again. And then we have to do a lost baby angle which was one of Russo’s favorites. It turned out that Terri was never pregnant of course.

Kane comes out with Shane, Bearer and the Stooges. He’s in the Corporation as well but doesn’t seem happy about it. Kane has a sign on his back for the Brisco Brothers’ Body Shop. Shane says this is a handicap match against the Stooges. Wait what?

Gerald Brisco/Pat Patterson vs. Kane

Vince comes out again and says this is because the Stooges were partially responsible for Shane getting hurt last week. Patterson tries to bribe Kane with what he has in his pocket: a cigarette and a condom. Would anyone else like to just watch Patterson go about his daily life? Chokeslam for Brisco. Patterson gets a chair but Kane sees him. Shane is in the ring with a mic and egging Kane on which is funny stuff. Kane PUNTS the chair off the mat and over the top. That was rather impressive looking actually. Kane grabs Shane by the throat but Vince says Kane will go back, meaning to an insane asylum. Not even a match.

Dennis Knight is still in the dungeon. The Acolytes come in and say “he’s ready for you.” Knight is more scared by this. The he is Undertaker and Knight would become Mideon in a FREAKY ceremony the next week.

Hardcore Title: A lSnow vs. Road Dogg

Snow is the challenger and wearing a shirt covered in “blood” from a bloodbath from the Brood. Snow hides behind the curtain and we fight on the stage. The Hardcore Title was actually a coveted title at this point and not a joke. It’s very violent very early as Snow is dominating. He hits a moonsault off the barricade but Road Dogg moves, sending Snow through a table.

Big old cookie sheet (why are those under wrestling rings or in arenas ever?) gets two. They head up the ramp and off to the side towards the back. Dogg goes up a set of steps and does a flying leap to take Snow down with a double axehandle. We’re in a supply closet now or something and various stupid things are used as weapons.

They find a cart of potted plants to throw at each other. This is more intense than it sounds. Snow gets a steel pole and does some nice spinning and flipping (there’s a proper term for it but I can’t think of it. Think of a drill team) with it before driving it into Roadie. They go outside into the snow. Keep in mind this is Massachusetts in early January so it’s FREEZING.

Snow gets put in a wheelbarrow or something and shoved into a wall. The referee can’t stand up in the snow which is kind of funny. A piledriver on a wooden pallet pins Snow so Road Dogg retains (Cole of course says he won the title because Michael Cole is a idiotic nitwit).

Rating: B. Keep in mind this was a hardcore match and not a regular match when thinking about that grade. This was actually quite good and worked rather well. Road Dogg was cleaning up his real life a lot around this time and got off of drugs and stopped drinking for the most part and his in ring work went WAY up as a result. The push was kind of a reward for it and he would get the IC Title in two months. This was one of the better Hardcore Title matches I remember actually.

Dennis Knight is thrown through a door.

The Corporation jumps Shawn and beats the living heck out of him, throwing him into the window of a car. That’s all in theory that is as the cameraman was knocked down and we heard glass breaking. When we come back Shawn is bloody and in the windshield.

WWF Title: Mankind vs. The Rock

This is No DQ remember. This is the match that Tony Schiavone gave the ending away to on their show, shifting the ratings for the night because of it. DX comes out to back up Foley, because they couldn’t go to the hospital with Shawn or help defend him right? Rock of course has the Corporation with him.

Rock jumps him immediately and knocks him to the floor. He won’t let the Corporation beat them up because he wants to do it himself. How noble of our heel champion. Foley does his first sick bump of the match as he goes knee first into the steps and flies over them in a painful looking shot. These two always had mad chemistry together, which is something that could be said about most guys with Rock actually.

Rock does commentary during the match, which always cracked me up. He talks a bit too much though so Foley takes over. Foley does a promo of his own and we cut to a shot of Vince and Shane, but we hear a bell ring. Foley is down and Rock has the bell. Subtle. Rock Bottom through a table and Foley is in trouble. This has all taken less than three minutes so I’m not leaving much out at all.

To play up the spontaneous nature here Rock is in street clothes, as in the kind you would work out in. Corporate Elbow (debuted 5 minutes from my house) hits for two as this is ALL Rock. Foley with a spinning neckbreaker out of nowhere to get both guys down. Bossman throws the belt in and a shot to the head (sounded SICK) gets two as well. Double arm DDT onto the belt and Rock is in big trouble.

There’s Mr. Socko as the crowd has lost it. Mandible Claw goes on but Shamrock pops Foley with a chair. Billy Gunn takes him down and the brawl begins. Everything goes crazy and CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin comes out and everyone loses it. He caves Rock’s head in with a chair and pulls Mick on top for the pin and the world title as the roof is blown off the arena.

Rating: A+. This was about a shocking moment and excitement and a feel good story and they NAILED it. This is very personal bias heavy, but they’re my reviews so who cares?

DX puts Foley on their shoulders as the Corporation carries Rock out. Cole gets in the famous line of “Mick Foley has achieved his dream and the dream of everyone else who has been told you can’t do it!” This is one of the best feel good moment in WWF history as Foley was considered one of the best to never be world champion as he worked as hard as anyone else but was never given a serious shot at it.

 

He got the shot tonight and he won the title. Road Dogg does the big announcement of Mankind being the new champion to a HUGE ovation. Foley dedicates the win to his kids and takes a lap around the ring with the belt to end the show. This is my favorite moment in wrestling history, bar none.

Overall Rating: B-. I hate to use that grade as the show is far from average given the ending but the rest of the show is pretty bad. The last half hour is great stuff though which pushes the rating higher.

 

There was a very clear and predictable pattern for everything that wasn’t the main event and it got annoying after awhile. The ending more than makes up for it though as this was just perfect all around. Great moment and 100% worth seeing. If you even remotely like Foley I defy you to not smile a bit while you watch this.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Survivor Series Count-Up 2012 Edition – 1999: This Show Is The Reason Rock Could Get Huge

Survivor Series 1999
Date: November 14, 1999
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 18,735
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a BIG show (pun intended) as a lot of stuff happens here. We’ve got a hall of famer debuting, a new world champion, and Austin getting run over by a car, putting him out of action for about a year. Everyone remembers it for the ending and the car stuff, so maybe there’s other good stuff in here too. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about the world title match tonight which they promoted knowing that it wasn’t going to happen. Stay classy WWF.

Team Godfather/D’Lo Brown vs. Team Dudley Boys

Godfather, D’Lo Brown, Headbangers

Dudley Boys, Acolytes

The Dudleys are brand new, having been around maybe a month or two. This is the debut of Brown as Godfather’s partner in pimping. The Headbangers are dressed as pimps as well which is pretty funny. Bubba still has a bad stutter here which was his whole gimmick for a few months. Godfather makes fun of him to even further tick the Dudleys off. The Acolytes are freshly out of the Corporate Ministry which has broken up and are just big tough guys now.

Bubba vs. Mosh (in afro) start things off. Bubba steals said afro but things speed up and the Dudleys are in trouble. A HARD clothesline takes Mosh down and it’s off to D-Von. The Dudleys were awesome at this point and were like nothing anyone had seen in years. Even their look was totally different and it worked very well. Off to Thrasher who has an afro held on with a chinstrap.

Bradshaw comes in and pounds away on Thrasher a bit before pounding him upside the head. Thrasher misses a corner charge and the Clothesline eliminates him quickly. Off to Mosh vs. Farrooq with the latter missing a charge in the corner but not being affected by it that badly. Back to D-Von as Jerry talks about wanting ho’s for Christmas. Mosh hits the running crotch attack to D-Von’s back but it’s off to Bubba via a blind tag and the 3D puts out Mosh, making it 4-2.

Brown comes in with a forearm to the head of Bubba and a legdrop for two. For absolutely no apparent reason, Bradshaw blasts Brown with the chair for a DQ, and does the same to Bubba as well, knocking him out cold. D-Von and Farrooq both want the pin and get in a fight over it, resulting in a double countout for a double elimination despite neither of them being legal. That would be the Dudleys’ first real feud.

Back in the ring Bubba gets two on Brown as it’s apparently 2-1 now. A suplex gets two for Bubba and it’s time for the bouncing punches from Ray. Brown comes back with a Sky High for two and loads up a top rope rana, only to get caught in a middle rope sitout powerbomb for two which looked awesome. A double clothesline puts both guys down and it’s hot tag to Godfather. The Ho Train sets up the Low Down for the final elimination.

Rating: C. I remember reading someone say that Godfather was the perfect opening act because you were guaranteed a good pop whenever he was out there. The more I see of him in matches like this, the more I agree with that statement. The guy wasn’t that great or anything, but the fans loved him and he was always a fun character that you didn’t have to take too seriously. That kind of fun character is a great choice for an opener and this was a fine opener here too.

Remember that future hall of famer debuting tonight? We get a video telling us how awesome his name is and how awesome his life has been so far. His name: Kurt Angle.

Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Stasiak

Stasiak is most famous for being an idiot in the Alliance and being the son of the most forgotten world champion ever in Stan Stasiak. Never heard of him? I think that proves my point. Angle has the Patriot’s old music which would become far more famous with its new owner. Angle immediately hits a fireman’s carry takeover and the boring chants start about fifteen seconds in.

They head to the mat with Angle hooking a hammerlock. The fans chant for the Redwings because someone actually wrestling in a wrestling match is an evil idea to fans in 1999. Stasiak comes back with a clothesline and a vertical suplex for two. Off to a chinlock which Kurt escapes pretty quickly. Angle comes back with a clothesline and goes to get the mic. He demands not to be booed because he’s the best in the world.

Back in and Kurt hits something like a dropkick but is put right back into the chinlock. The hold is broken again and Angle comes back with a powerslam for two. Stasiak hits a lay out F5 but misses a top rope cross body. The Olympic Slam gets the pin and starts the hottest rookie year ever in wrestling.

Rating: D+. For a debut, this wasn’t great. However, this would be the start of one of one of the best careers of all time. Angle being serious wasn’t the right choice for him and it wasn’t until he became a total goof that took himself WAY too seriously while being stupid at the same time that he became the awesome Kurt that we know and love. It helped that he could go with anyone in the ring too.

We get a clip from earlier on Heat where HHH called Austin and Rock to the ring in an attempted ambush but the combined forces of Road Dogg and X-Pac didn’t stop two of the biggest stars ever. He wasn’t quite the Cerebral Assassin yet.

Team Val Venis vs. Team British Bulldog

Val Venis, Mark Henry, Gangrel, Steve Blackman

British Bulldog, Mean Street Posse

Even JR says that Val’s team has nothing in common at all. The Posse is a group of three guys from Greenwich, Connecticut who wear sweater vests and never won a match that wasn’t a hardcore match that they won by mistake. I have no idea why this match exists but my guess is “we have no idea what else to do with these fifteen minutes.” Bulldog is European Champion here which is likely a title Val wants.

The captains start things off and after some quick offense from both, it’s off to Pete Gas (the Posse was Rodney, Pete Gas and Joey Abs). Pete is scared to death of having to actually wrestle so it’s back to Bulldog. Once Venis is down it’s off to Pete who hits a slingshot to send Val chest first into the buckle. A belly to back suplex gets two for Pete as Jerry asks where JR would get nice clothes in Oklahoma. JR: “Arkansas.” Off to Blackman for the only thing he could do: martial arts. A bicycle kick gets the quick elimination for Blackman.

Off to Rodney who has even less luck against Blackman, immediately getting taken down. Gangrel comes in who gets caught in a crucifix for two before Gangrel realizes he’s fighting Rodney. He pounds on the Posse dude, shrugs off a cheap shot from Joey, and plants Rodney with the implant DDT (Edgecution) for the elimination. Joey, by far the best of the three Posse members, comes in and gets to face Mark Henry. Joey actually hits a hot shot on Henry but crotches himself on the middle rope. Mark does about what you would expect him to and splashes him for the pin.

So it’s 4-1 now and Bulldog comes in to fight Henry. Mark runs Bulldog over with ease and it’s off to Gangrel. Gangrel goes up top and is immediately crotched and superplexed down to make it 3-1. Blackman is in next but he misses a middle rope headbutt. He argues with the referee and gets caught in a fisherman’s suplex to make it Henry/Val vs. Bulldog. Val gets to start but it’s quickly a double team. Jerry: “Hey what’s this?” JR: “Well it looks like Mark Henry and Val Venis double teaming the Bulldog King.” Val gets sent to the floor but Henry splashes Bulldog, allowing Val to come in off the top with the Money Shot for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was as worthless as it was advertised. The Posse is one of those groups that is funny in retrospect but at the time they were wasting PPV time when there had to have been better options for this spot. Venis would have been a bigger deal a year ago so I’m not quite sure why he was in this spot either. Little trivia note: this is the shortest four on four Survivor Series match ever, breaking the record set about 20 minutes ago.

Michael Cole walks in on the Divas locker room and has to rub oil on Ivory’s stomach. Next.

Fabulous Moolah/Mae Young/Tori/Debra vs. Ivory/Luna Vachon/Terri Runnels/Jacqueline

Thank goodness this isn’t an elimination match. For some reason Moolah and Mae were wrestling in 99 with Moolah even winning the Women’s Title at one point. Jerry’s face when Debra comes out is hilarious. Ivory is Women’s Champion at this point. Moolah jumps the champion in the aisle to start but gets shoved down for her efforts. We officially start with Tori vs. Jackie but Luna comes in for some double teaming.

Keep in mind that Tori is a wrestler in name only, Mae and Moolah combined to be over 150 years old, and Terri and Debra are there as eye candy. After less than two minutes, a double clothesline from the old chicks gives Moolah the pin on Ivory. This may have been the worst idea this side of the birth of a hand. This is what Raw is for people.

Moolah and Ivory “brawl” post match.

X-Pac lists off everything wrong with Kane and says he’ll win tonight. Short and simple here.

X-Pac vs. Kane

Pac turned on Kane when they were partners, starting a feud that went on for MONTHS. X-Pac eventually stole Kane’s girlfriend Tori as well, turning her into a smoking hot valet instead of a smoking hot bad wrestler. Earlier today, Tori and Kane said they don’t take what X-Pac has done personally. Kane has the awesome inverted tights colors tonight. Pac jumps Kane during the entrance and we start fast.

Kane no sells all of the shots to his head. I’ve always wondered if the mask is supposed to absorb the offense from the other guy. Kane chokes away and uppercuts Pac down for no cover. Kane goes up but Pac dropkicks him in the head on the way up in a nice counter. We head to the floor for a bit where Pac sends him into the post to take over. Kane comes back with an uppercut but gets kicked in the head to take him back down.

More kicking slows Kane down but the Bronco Buster is countered by a hand around the throat. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Pac down and there’s the top rope clothesline. There’s the chokeslam but Road Dogg comes in to break up the pin. Kane stalks the Dogg to the floor but walks into the X-Factor for two. The tombstone is loaded up but HHH comes in with the world title shot to the head to draw the DQ.

Rating: C+. I liked this a lot more than most matches that X-Pac had going on at this time. The problem was that Pac would win all of his matches against monsters and it would get more and more unrealistic every time. Here though Kane took a lot of offense from Pac but it didn’t really hurt him, which is what made this much better. The feud would go on WAY too long though.

Post match Kane gets beaten down until Tori comes out. Pac kicks Tori in the face and Kane snaps, sending DX “scattering like quail” according to JR.

The Rock says nothing because HHH shows up and they brawl.

Big Show vs. Mideon/Viscera/Big Boss Man/Prince Albert

This was supposed to be Big Show and Kaientai and Blue Meanie but Show beat them up so he could do this himself. This is during Boss Man vs. Big Show, which is based around Boss Man making fun of Show for having his dad die (kayfabe). It led to a bad moment at a “funeral” where Boss Man stole the coffin and dragged Show along the ground on top of the coffin with a car. Show chokes Albert to the floor and chokeslams Mideon for the pin in less than 20 seconds. Albert is gone 10 seconds later to a chokeslam, as is Big Visc. Boss Man is like screw this and walks out. Show wins in less than 90 seconds.

Austin is in the back but HHH comes up to attack him too. HHH runs away with Austin chasing after him. Austin winds up in a parking garage and is run over by a car which speeds away. This was the way that Austin was written off TV for the better part of a year to have major neck surgery. He had needed it forever but it wasn’t until now when the company could afford to let him off for that long.

The question would eventually be who ran him over, and it would eventually be revealed as Rikishi in one of the biggest WHAT WERE THEY THINKING moments ever. Test, Stephanie, Vince and eventually HHH show up to look at Austin with most of them being concerned. JR goes to see him as well. Vince accuses HHH and DX but they deny any involvement.

Intercontinental Title: Chyna vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho has only been around a few months and is challenging here. Chyna has Miss Kitty here who isn’t even hiding that she’s T&A here, coming out in a bikini and that’s it. Oh and boots. It’s a brawl to start and Kitty is shoved down because Jericho is a jerk. They head to the floor with Jericho’s knees going into the steps, but Chyna misses a dive off said steps to give the Canadian control.

Back in and Jericho gets hot shotted onto the ropes and put in the Tree of Woe. Chyna tries a German but Jericho kicks her low….with no effect because Chyna isn’t a guy. A standing rana takes Jericho down but he pops back up and clotheslines her to the floor. The springboard dive takes Chyna out again as JR talks about not being into the match due to what happened to Austin. For once this is an acceptable statement.

Jericho throws Chyna over the announce table and pours water over her head because Jericho is a jerk. Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Jericho as does a small package for Chyna. Chyna tries to make a comeback but Jericho bulldogs him down for two and a BIG face pop. A spinwheel kick puts Chyna down and Jericho is swaggering. A clothesline puts Chyna on the floor and Kitty gets kissed.

Chyna comes back with a spear and posts Jericho as the crowd noticeably gets quieter. Back in and Jericho hits a layout powerbomb for two and Jericho is getting frustrated. Lionsault misses and Chyna hits the springboard elbow and a DDT for two. With about two minutes left, Lawler mentions a stipulation that Jericho will get a sex change if he loses. Keep those priorities straight guys.

With the referee down, a belt shot to the head gets two for Chris but Chyna comes back with a Pedigree for two of her own. Jericho puts her in the Walls but Chyna finally makes the rope. The place boos the submission being broken. Jericho loads up a superplex but a Kitty distraction lets Chyna hit him low and a Pedigree (kind of) off the top gets the pin to retain the title.

Rating: B. This took a bit to get going but they hit a groove in that ending sequence. The most important thing here though was Jericho wrestled her like any other opponent rather than making a spectacle out of her being a woman. These two would stay at it for awhile until Chyna went nuts and eventually started wrestling women, which was the downfall of her career. Well that and being nuts and HHH breaking up with her, but that’s another story.

HHH comes in to see Shane, Stephanie and Test. He still denies having anything to do with it but wants to know if the match is now one on one. Shane says he’ll think of something. Note that Test is there with Shane.

Team Too Cool vs. Team Edge/Christian

Too Cool, The Hollys

Edge/Christian, Hardy Boys

This is just after the Hardys and the Canadians had the first tag team ladder match which would launch them into stardom soon after. Too Cool is still stupid here, as opposed to later on when they would be stupid and WAY over. The Hardys have Terri with them which wouldn’t last long. Edge and Scotty get things started as Jerry talks about Scotty’s pants. They chop it out in the corner before things speed up a bit and Edge spinwheel kicks him down.

Off to Crash vs. Matt with Matt getting two off a suplex. Crash gets crotched on the top and punched to the floor. Grandmaster sneaks up on Matt for a sunset bomb to the floor. We unleash the dives as everyone small enough to hits a big dive to take out everyone that was already on the floor with Jeff capping it off. Back in and Christian powerslams Crash for two. The Hollys hit a Hart Attack on Crash Christian for two of their own and Hardcore is in.

We’re promised an update on Austin at the end of this match because THIS MATCH of all things is more important than a guy being hit by a car. Off to Grandmaster whose bulldog is countered and he goes flying so far that he kicks the camera, giving us a cool visual. Off to Hardcore vs. Edge who starts spearing a lot of people. Grandmaster stops to dance and is immediately speared down. In the big melee, Hardcore rolls up Edge for the pin. Fifteen seconds later, Scotty hits a top rope DDT to eliminate Matt, making it 4-2.

Jeff and Scotty do a fast pinfall reversal sequence before Scotty hits the not yet popular Worm. A sitout powerbomb by Scotty with Grandmaster assisting gets two as does a middle rope missile dropkick from Sexay. Too Cool hits the second Hart Attack of the match which gets two on Jeff. Everything breaks down but the Hollys get in an argument. Terri gets on the apron for a distraction which lets Christian hit both of Too Cool low. Jeff hits a 450 on Scotty for the elimination.

So it’s Crash/Grandmaster/Hardcore Holly vs. Jeff and Christian. JR goes on a rant about Austin as Christian and Jeff try some Poetry in Motion, but Hardcore comes off the top with a missile dropkick in a SWEET looking counter. Grandmaster adds a guillotine legdrop for the elimination. Christian immediately hits a reverse DDT on Grandmaster to get us down to Christian vs. the Hollys.

JR continues to brood and want an update about Austin. Jerry needling him makes me chuckle as he’s awesome at being a jerk. Crash beats on Christian for a bit before it’s off to Hardcore again. Back to Crash who gets caught in the Unprettier/Killswitch for the pin. Christian tries a victory roll on Hardcore but Bob (Hardcore for you schmucks out there) falls on top for the final pin.

Rating: C+. The problem here was that the pairing that this should have been based around, Edge and Christian and the Hardys, were on the same team rather than getting to tear the house down against each other. The other two teams didn’t mean anything and the ending of this sucked. Once the Dudleys got involved with the brother teams, it was all gravy for almost two years.

Shane says that Vince is at the emergency room with Austin. Austin never lost consciousness but is still undergoing tests. Shane says there will be a triple threat tonight, but Austin won’t be in it. Test is there once again.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Mankind/Al Snow

The Outlaws are defending. Jerry accuses Billy of being the driver but Lawler doesn’t care at all. Mankind says Austin will get through this. Gunn and Mankind get things going with Billy getting two off a neckbreaker. We hit a sleeper like a minute in and then we look at the Head. JR and Jerry are arguing again as the guys in the ring go to th efloor, making them guys no longer in the ring.

Roadie accidentally hits Billy in the face and it’s off to Snow vs. Road Dogg. JR talks about Snow having his action figure pulled off the shelves at Wal-Mart because some stupid professor said that having a severed head included in a toy would send the wrong message to her kids about violence to women. This is going to be a quick sidebar.

First and foremost, it’s not a severed head. It’s a mannequin head and simply LOOKING AT THE FREAKING THING would tell you that. Second, if you’re concerned about what kind of impression a toy would give to your kids, either A, don’t buy it for them, or B, TELL THEM WHY YOU DON’T LIKE IT. Heaven forbid you have to tell your kid he can’t have something he wants because you deem it inappropriate. Third, and this is the part that I like best, Snow mentioned in a promo that clearly the stores care about their customers because they pulled the figure from the shelves, but the guns, bullets and knives are still on the shelves.

Anyway, now that the stupid people who can’t think before they run their mouths and have to decide how people should live their lives because apparently people aren’t smart enough to make decisions for themselves are out of the way, let’s get back to this dull match. Mankind pounds on Roadie in the corner and hits a running knee to the head. Snow pokes Road Dogg with a chair in the ribs which isn’t a DQ for some reason. Neither is the shot to Road Dogg’s back from Mankind.

Mankind hooks a reverse chinlock back in the ring followed by a lot of stomping in the corner from Al. Mankind gets two off a knee lift as things continue to go slowly. Snow hits his headbutts but Road Dogg fires off some lefts and a big right to take Snow down. Everything breaks down and the crowd is DEAD for this. They head to the floor with the Outlaws taking over.

Snow gets beaten on for awhile before clotheslining Roadie down and it’s not hot tag to Mankind. Mankind pounds away for a bit but gets caught by the Fameasser for two. Snow hits the Snow Plow on Road Dogg and here’s Socko. Both Outlaws get Clawed but they both hit Mankind low to escape. Snow hits Billy with Head to give Mankind a two count, followed quickly by the Outlaws hitting a spike piledriver on Mankind to retain.

Rating: D. This got better at the end but the twelve minutes before that were way too dull to be considered good at all. Mankind and Snow were there to fill in spots and while that’s ok, it doesn’t make for an interesting match. It didn’t help that the crowd was deader than Billy Gunn’s career for most of the match. Nothing to see here.

Since Vince is at the hospital, he won’t be refereeing the main event tonight.

We see Austin get run down again.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. HHH vs. ???

The third man is…..shockingly not Test but rather the Big Show. I mentioned Test over and over again tonight because every sign on the planet pointed to him being the guy but they went with Show instead. That’s not to say this is a horrible idea or that it doesn’t make sense because there were no clues or anything beforehand, but it was certainly a surprising pick.

Rock and HHH attack Show to start but to no avail. Show shoulder blocks them down but Rock breaks up a chokeslam on the Game. HHH is defending if that’s not clear. Rock and HHH team up to clothesline Show to the floor but Rock is quickly pulled to the floor. All three guys wind up on the floor with HHH getting dropped on the barricade. Back in and Show misses a splash in the corner and gets caught in a Russian legsweep for no cover.

The People’s Elbow gets one on Show as HHH saves. This is one fall to a finish in case you were wondering. HHH chokes Rock in the corner but Show gets back up and side slams Rock for two. Show kicks HHH to the floor and knocks the Game up the aisle. The fans don’t seem to be sure what to think of Show in this spot but they’re not bored. Rock charges up the aisle to clothesline Show down before going after HHH again.

HHH gets knocked through a production table and Rock is in control. Scratch that theory as Show comes in and beats the tar out of HHH, only to have Rock hit Show with a fire extinguisher. Rock and HHH start heading back to the ring but HHH suplexes him in the aisle. Show is back because the guy can’t be kept down. Show drops HHH on the announce table but Rock drills Show in the head with the bell. Rock and HHH hit a double suplex on Show through the table for the WHOA spot of the match.

Rock and HHH head into the crowd to brawl as this has been a wild fight for the majority of the match so far. Back to the ring and the referee gets clotheslined down by Rock by mistake. The Rock Bottom and Pedigree are both countered, the latter being countered into a catapult into the buckle. There’s the Rock Bottom but there’s no referee. Shane runs out in a referee’s shirt to count two.

Another Rock Bottom hits but Show pulls Shane out of the ring. Rock goes after Show on the floor which goes about as well as you would expect. Actually scratch that as you might expect Rock to beat Show up. Show puts him on the table and goes back into the ring to knock HHH down before going back to beat on Rock some more. Rock gets thrown into the steps and HHH has the belt, only for Shane to take it away. HHH Pedigrees Shane and they’re all back inside again. Here’s DX to go after Big Show and Rock but here’s Vince as well. He knocks HHH out with the belt and a chokeslam makes Show champion.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work that well for me at all. Show has no connection to the feud at all which hurts things a bit, but at the end of the day there was no real flow to the match at all. Show winning is a good pick as it gives some closure to the week for him where his dad died and all that, but his title reign wouldn’t work all that well due to him mainly feuding with Big Boss Man. Still though, decent moment but a bad match.

Show celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a very back and forth show as the stuff that was interesting was interesting (although not necessarily good) and the stuff that was bad and dull was VERY bad and dull. This show is much more about setting things up for the future, which is ok, but it doesn’t really do much for those of us watching this. Not really recommended, but there are some far worse shows out there.

Ratings Comparison

Team Godfather/D’Lo Brown vs. Team Dudley Boys

Original: B-

Redo: C

Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Stasiak

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Team Val Venis vs. Team British Bulldog

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Team Mae Young vs. Team Ivory

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Kane vs. X-Pac

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Big Show vs. Team Big Boss Man

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Chyna vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: B

Team Too Cool vs. Team Edge/Christian

Original: B

Redo: C+

New Age Outlaws vs. Al Snow/Mankind

Original: D+

Redo: D

Big Show vs. HHH vs. The Rock

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

I liked most of the matches better the first time and the overall rating was higher. Simple and easy, as usual.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/08/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1999-a-lot-happens-here/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




ECW on TNN – December 31, 1999: Not A Bad Show To End The Millennium With

ECW on TNN
Date: December 31, 1999
Location: Westchester County Center, White Plains, New York
Attendance: 2,800
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

It’s not often I get to say this but we close out the millennium with this. The main attraction tonight is Tanaka vs. Awesome in a rematch from last week for the title with Tanaka defending tonight. Other than that, we get to continue the seemingly never ending feud between Raven/Dreamer and the Impact Players. Let’s get to it.

The Impact Players (clearly in the same spot and clothes they were in last week) talk about how the savior needs to be reborn by January 9. We get a recap of the end of last week’s show.

Raven talks about being crucified for the sins of his past.

Theme song.

After Joey and Joel do their thing, here’s Mikey Whipwreck to open the show. This is his return to the company after being in WCW for a year. Before he can say anything, here are the Impact Players with something to say. The Players have a lot of money to give to Mikey if he’ll take somebody out, with the logic of he sold out once so why not again? The target is Raven so here’s Bird Boy.

Raven vs. Mikey Whipwreck

Mikey charges at Raven and hits a dropkick to the ribs before stomping away in the corner. A slingshot legdrop to the back of Raven’s head has Bird Boy in early trouble so Mikey goes to the floor. He grabs the mic and says he’s 26 and lives at home but he’s NOT a baby. Mikey puts Raven on a table and drops an elbow to drive him through said table as Raven is in trouble. There’s a big chair shot to the back and a Russian legsweep to send Raven’s back into the barricade.

That gets two in the ring as does a small package. Raven tries a backslide out of nowhere for two but Mikey kicks his head off with a dropkick for two. The drop toehold puts Mikey’s face into the chair but Raven is so spent that Mikey gets two before Raven can move. Raven gets all fired up and rubs a snot rag in Mikey’s face before hitting the DDT for the pin.

Rating: C. This is ECW style but it was an actual coherent match which is more than you can say for the vast majority of their stuff. Mikey is a guy that did a lot of stuff for the company back in the day but he never amounted to anything elsewhere. Raven getting to wrestle a match is very much a rarity anymore so it was a nice surprise.

Raven gets caught by a superkick to put him down post match and it’s a double beating from the Players until Dreamer runs out with a chair. Not that we see this as we’re seeing highlights from Tanaka vs. Awesome from last week.

Francine says Raven needs more help but Dreamer doesn’t care.

Tanaka is warming up.

Awesome is ready.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Super Crazy

This should be good. A quick tilt-a-whirl backbreaker takes Tajiri down but he comes back with the handspring elbow and things speed up. No one is interested in selling here and we wind up at a standoff. Tajiri drops to the floor, seemingly just so Crazy can hit a baseball slide and a moonsault press off the top to the floor. Joel does his Spanish schtick and we head back inside. Tajiri blocks a kick and fires off some of his own.

A HARD low dropkick to the head puts Crazy down and another….wakes him up enough to hit a springboard dropkicks and a moonsault. This is where most ECW matches lose me. Crazy pounds away in the corner but charges into a boot to send him to the outside. Tajiri hits a big old flip dive to take Crazy out again before sending him into the barricade. The Buzzsaw Kick puts Crazy down but there’s no cover for some reason.

There’s a full nelson which is countered into the spinning backbreaker hold that Tajiri used on occasion. Crazy completely no sells all of that and hits a powerbomb for two. Two thirds of the triple moonsaults hit before Tajiri crotches him and puts Crazy in the Tree of Woe for a baseball slide dropkick. Crazy tries a sunset flip but Tajiri kicks him in the head and a brainbuster finally gets Tajiri the pin.

Rating: C-. I love Tajiri but man alive these matches are annoying. The no selling from Crazy is ridiculous as he got kicked in the head and popped up for a big spot mere seconds later? THAT MAKES NO SENSE! How is that supposed to work? The high spots were good and Tajiri’s kicks were good as always, but other than that there wasn’t anything of note here at all.

Tanaka speaks Japanese.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka

No entrances for either guy and Tanaka is defending here. Awesome jumps Tanaka to start and hits a kind of overhead release belly to belly. Tanaka is sent to the floor and Awesome hits a big plancha to take him down. We get the first table set up on the floor but Tanaka breaks up the powerbomb through it. A top rope cross body to the floor takes out Awesome as does a running chair shot to the head.

They head into the crowd with Awesome running the champ over in the process. That goes nowhere so Awesome hits a slingshot splash back inside for two. Tanaka won’t stay down after three chair shots to the head. A fourth and fifth only keep him down for a bit and he dropkicks Awesome out of the air on an attempt at a top rope chair shot. Tanaka hits him with a chair and goes to the floor to get a second one, which he drives Awesome’s head into with a tornado DDT for two.

A top rope elbow with the chair gets two as well for the champion as we’re firmly into the “nothing will stop these guys” stage. Diamond Dust (flipping Stunner out of the corner) mostly misses and only gets two. Awesome hits a release German suplex and a chokebomb but he can’t cover. The running Awesome Bomb gets another two and it’s table time. An Awesome Bomb through the table is countered but the second attempt hits for just two.

Another table is set up but Tanaka gets up before Awesome can splash him. They head up to the top and Tanaka DDTs him through the table but he can’t cover. The Roaring Elbow only gets two and Tanaka is stunned. Diamond Dust is countered and Awesome hits a spinebuster and the Awesome Splash for two. They both head up top again and Awesome pulls off a sitout powerbomb off the top for the pin and the title. Sweet ending spot.

Rating: C. This was somewhat better than last week’s match but the idea of these two not being able to hurt each other at all gets a bit old after awhile. Awesome hitting that powerbomb out of the corner was pretty cool so at least they ended it with a big spot. Tanaka would never really do anything else in ECW again as he was just there and champion as part of a deal with FMW from Japan.

Post match Spike Dudley comes out and tries to beat up Awesome but he gets beaten down as well. Spike’s girlfriend/fan comes in to beat up Awesome’s manager but Awesome kills her with a clothesline. Spike gets put through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Questionable wrestling aside, this was probably the best show they’ve had in months. First and foremost, the show was better structured tonight with the top angle to open the show, then a midcard match and then the world title to close the show and set up the world title match at the PPV. It’s not a good show but it makes more sense and had less stupid stuff than the rest of the shows they’ve had lately.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




ECW on TNN – December 24, 1999: Hang On. This One Is Going By Fast.

ECW on TNN
Date: December 24, 1999
Location: Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 2,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

For once we’ve got a huge show here with Awesome defending the world title against Masato Tanaka. I remember hearing about this match back in 1999 and being furious that I had to go to my family’s Christmas party instead of being able to watch the title match. I got to see a few minutes here and there but I’ve never seen it all the way through. Let’s get to it.

Joel and Joey welcome us to the show until Cyrus interrupts them. Cyrus runs down Joel and Joel finally snaps back, saying there’s no ECW office to be fed up with him. Cyrus drops the bomb (I guess?) that he works for TNN, which freaks Joel out. We’re told that next week, Tanaka gets his shot. Judge Jeff Jones, Mike Awesome’s manager, comes out and says that if Spike Dudley wants a title shot, he needs to come and ask for it.

This brings out Spike as well as Awesome with the champion escaping the Acid Drop and laying out Spike with a huge clothesline. Awesome launches Spike over the top with Spike’s leg landing on the barricade. Tanaka “catches” him and then jumps the rail to fight Awesome right now. People from the back come out to break it up including Heyman, but Cyrus says let the match happen tonight. Heyman is cool with that and we have a main event for later.

Intro sequence.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka

This is joined in progress and Tanaka is in workout pants. Tanaka sends him to the floor and into the barricade followed by a chair to the head. These two were rivals in Japan with Tanaka being the guy that beat Awesome far more than anyone else. Awesome is defending and already beat Tanaka at two straight PPVs. They head into the crowd with the champion taking over.

That doesn’t seem to interest them that much so it’s time to head back to ringside. A top rope clothesline gets two for Awesome and the annoying fans already want tables. A sitout powerbomb gets two as well for Awesome and the fans get their wish. Tanaka takes a huge running Awesome Bomb off the apron through said table, as Wrestling Law #1 (if you set the table, you go through it) doesn’t apply in ECW.

We take a break and come back with the Awesome Splash getting two. Awesome brings in another table and about ten people are watching from the aisle. Tanaka escapes another powerbomb and hits a release German through the table followed by a tornado DDT onto a chair for two. A top rope elbow with a chair gets two for Tanaka as well. Awesome crushes Tanaka’s head with a chair but Tanaka gets up. Two more chairs to the head won’t put him down but a third finally does.

A running powerbomb gets two for Awesome as we’re firmly into the “what does it take to win this” mode. We take another break and come back with Tanaka hitting a tornado DDT off the top through a table for two. The fans are starting to lose it on these kickouts. Tanaka hits the Roaring Elbow (a discus elbow smash to the face) for the pin and the title out of nowhere.

Rating: C. This rating depends on how you look at it. It was exciting, but it was completely ridiculous. The biggest problem of all: Awesome can stand up through all of those huge moves with all of those weapons, but an elbow to the face is enough to knock him out? How exactly does that work? These matches are well received, and while they’re exciting, they destroy the limits of what it means to be realistic and that brings them down a lot.

Awesome puts the belt on Tanaka and then beats him up, followed by a powerbomb over the ropes and through a table on the floor.

Awesome is furious post break and goes after Cyrus, who blames Paulie.

Super Crazy vs. Ikuto Hidaka

Before the match, we cut to the back and see Corino, Jack Victory and Rhyno leaving a locker room after apparently destroying Axl Rotten and Balls Mahoney with a chair. It’s a feeling out process to start with with Crazy going to the floor. Back in and it’s time for gymnastics. They both avoid everything the other person throws before they both hit armdrags and nip up at the same time for a standoff.

Hidaka ducks a kick and a headscissors sends Crazy to the outside. A HUGE flip dive takes crazy out again and Hidaka is in control. Crazy whips him into the barricade and fires off some kicks before we head back inside. A springboard missile dropkick puts Hidaka down and a moonsault gets two for Crazy. Crazy hooks a surfboard and then a dragon sleeper to keep Hidaka in trouble.

Hidaka is sent to the floor again but comes back in with a springboard missile dropkick to the knee. There’s a leg lock but Hidaka lets it go way too fast. West Coast Pop gets two for Hidaka and he counters a powerbomb into a tornado DDT for two more. He goes up again but misses his flip attack, allowing Crazy to hit a sitout powerbomb for the pin. Why did referees in ECW count so fast?

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches that was exciting but it had nothing as far as storytelling or flow to it other than that 15 seconds of leg work that Hidaka did. I’ve never head of Hidaka other than him in ECW, which is odd as he had the high flying ability that indy companies love.

House show/merchandise ads.

Mike Awesome yells at Lou E. Dangerously who was literally a Heyman imitator. Lou: “I’m not him! LOOK! I HAVE HAIR!” Awesome yells at his manager for taking too much credit for Awesome’s success.

Tag Titles: Raven/Tommy Dreamer vs. Da Baldies

Before the match we get comments from the Impact Players who are ready for Guilty As Charged and their title shot. Storm: “Now put that in your Y2J and smoke it.” We come back to the arena to see the Players running in to beat down Raven while Dreamer is in the crowd for some reason. There’s no match here as the Players beat up Raven and cuff him up in a crucifixion position at the entrance. Raven gets caned and busted open as the Players pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is one of those shows that feels like it’s charging by as fast as it can and hopes that you can’t tell what’s on it but it hopes that you like the streaks of color you see. The two matches that actually happened were fast paced and entertaining, but they certainly weren’t good from a quality standpoint at all. We’ll have a rematch for the title next week anyway and guess what happens there.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




ECW on TNN – December 17, 1999: It Took Five Weeks But We’re Making Progress

ECW on TNN
Date: December 17, 1999
Location: Siegel Center, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re getting close to the end of the year and hopefully we actually have some development in the tag title feud. I remember something major that was coming next week but I think that was impromptu instead of something that was set up the week before. Then again that was on Christmas Eve so it’s not like building something up would have served a purpose anyway. Let’s get to it.

Joel and Joey welcome us from the announce position instead of in the ring as usual. We actually have a #1 contenders tag match tonight.

The Impact Players are ready for Candido and Rhyno tonight.

Opening sequence.

Nova and some guy are in the back when Chris Chetti comes in and says he’s coming back tonight. Nova says no way because of Chetti’s back isn’t healed yet. Chetti doesn’t want to wind up being way too hurt and he picked the other guy (apparently Kid Kash) to be the substitute partner. Chetti leaves and accuses both guys of checking him out as he leaves, but he can’t blame them because he can turn straight people gay. Ok then.

The Baldies issue an open challenge to anyone in the back.

DeVito vs. New Jack

This would be a bit more surprising if New Jack hadn’t already been announced as facing one of the Baldies tonight. Jack breaks a crutch over DeVito’s back to start followed by breaking a keyboard over his head. Joel: “I think he just swallowed an asterisk!” Something metal follows that upside DeVito’s head and the keyboard is placed between DeVito’s legs and crushed with a kendo stick. A top rope guitar shot gets the pin. Yes, they actually called this a wrestling match.

Post the alleged match New Jack pulls out a fork but before he can embrace his inner Abdullah, the other Baldies run in for the save. They staple New Jack’s ear and we go to a break.

Back with Da Baldies still in the ring and issuing another open challenge.

Mike Awesome vs. Grimes

Well that’s quite an answer. Grimes takes over to start with a top rope clothesline but Awesome pops back up. This isn’t for the title I don’t think. Awesome snaps off a German and clotheslines Grimes to the floor, giving us three more wrestling moves than in the whole New Jack thing. Awesome hits a big dive to take out Grimes on the floor. I have no idea if Awesome is a face or a heel but he’s wrestling like the former here.

A big chair shot to the back of Grimes keeps him in trouble but he reverses Awesome into the barricade. Awesome is like screw that and slams Grimes’ head into the concrete to take over again. It’s table time already and Grimes is powerbombed off the apron through said table, which is good for the pin back in the ring. Total squash.

Judge Jeff Jones (Awesome’s manager) says Awesome is the best giant in the world. Cue the giant killer Spike Dudley for the Acid Drop on the champion.

Danny Doring is in the shower and Elektra joins him. He pulls back the curtain but finds Roadkill instead. Francine comes in and Elektra pops in and complains about hearing Francine here. Elektra threatens Doring with castration. This went nowhere.

Joey is talking about the upcoming match when Joel pops up in a towel saying he wants more shower scenes.

Tom Marquez vs. Super Calo vs. Ikuto Hidaka

Hidaka gets sent to the floor by a double team, followed by Marquez turning on Calo almost immediately. Hidaka pops back in and takes out Calo but Marquez pounds him into the corner. A tornado DDT from Hidaka gets two on Marquez but Calo comes back in with a springboard missile dropkick. Hidaka dropkicks everyone down and here’s Sabu to beat up all three guys. Another too short to rate match.

All three guys are driven through the same table. Must be a budget cutback. Sabu vs. Van Dam for the TV Title is official for the PPV.

Buy our stuff!

Rhyno/Chris Candido vs. Impact Players

The winners get Raven and Dreamer at the PPV for the titles. Rhyno and Justin start things off and it’s power vs. speed. A wheelbarrow slam puts Justin on the floor and it’s off to Candido vs. Storm who have history of their own. Things get a lot more technical and Candido takes Storm down, followed by a middle rope legdrop. Storm ducks under a charging Candido to Chris into a superkick from Credible.

Jason slides in a chair because what would an ECW match be without one? Justin backdrops Candido onto the chair and drops a knee for no cover. Candido blocks what might have been a suplex and DDTs Justin onto the chair. Off to Rhyno and Justin gets double teamed. Justin gets a tag out of nowhere and Storm comes in with a springboard clothesline to Candido.

Rhyno kills him with a spinebuster for two and it’s back to Candido again for a delayed vertical suplex on Lance. Storm escapes but gets his head kicked off by an enziguri for two. There’s a superplex on Storm but the girls come in for a catfight. Justin canes Candido and Storm avoids a Gore, sending it into Candido by mistakes. Justin superkicks Candido down to get the title shot at Guilty As Charged.

Rating: C. Not terrible here as for the most part it was just a tag match instead of some big wild brawl. Also, we FINALLY advance the story instead of doing the same things over and over again which is a major perk. We have a title match to build to now which is all I’ve been wanting from this story. Well that and less Justin but you can’t get everything.

Candido and Rhyno get in an argument in the aisle while Storm says the Impact Players will win the titles. Storm talks down about Sandman and here’s Sandy himself. The entrance is sped up here and only takes about a minute and a half. The Players leave and Jason is left all alone. There’s a cane shot to his head and multiple more to his body. Jason is a decoy though and Sandman gets beaten down. Sandman gets in some offense but Rhyno comes back in and Gores him out of frustration.

Raven talks about needing to do the right thing because he can’t fight Dreamer again. Dreamer is too strong for him now and they need to take out the Impact Players at the PPV. He begs Dreamer to understand that but the camera pans back to show that he’s talking to Francine.

Overall Rating: C. Better show this week because the main story was actually advanced. Also whenever Mike Awesome goes out there and destroys whatever people he sees in his path it’s a good day. The shows have picked up since the world champion is around and since we’ve actually started building up to the PPV. That’s what’s been missing the last three or four weeks.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




ECW on TNN – December 10, 1999: We’re Running Around In Circles

ECW on TNN
Date: December 10, 1999
Location: The Tabernacle, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re slowly getting to Guilty As Charged but it’s still far enough away that we don’t need to talk about it yet. The main story here is still Raven vs. Dreamer because it worked in 95 so of course it’ll work now right? These shows are all over the place most of the time so there’s no way to know what’s coming here. Let’s get to it.

We open with Van Dam in the ring dedicating his title defense tonight to Sabu who is here but injured apparently. Sabu doesn’t like it and has to be held back. Van Dam calls Sabu the Sheik’s (Sabu’s legit uncle and trainer) second favorite wrestler.

We cut to the back where Raven is ramming his head against the wall but Dreamer comes in to stop him, saying they’re proud of Raven.

Theme song.

Joey and Joel are in the ring and after our opening limerick, we throw it to a recap of last week with Steve Corino going to a Limp Bizkit concert. Back in the arena we have Corino and Jack Victory in the ring. Corino bashes hardcore wrestling and hardcore music but praises the Backstreet Boys, N’Sync and Britney Spears. Corino goes on a rant about how bad music is and then complains about Dusty Rhodes……who happens to be in the crowd.

Corino rants about how everyone here is drunk and Dusty killed WCW. Dusty comes to the ring with a smile on his face and gets in Corino’s face. Corino calls himself the future of pro wrestling and says he never respected Dusty. Dusty elbows Steve and Victory in the head and drops the big elbow on Corino.

After some ads, Dusty is in the ring still. He takes a bow and that’s it.

We recap the Hardcore TV taping from earlier.

The Impact Players say they can both beat Sandman and don’t need any help.

Spike Dudley vs. Uganda

Acid Drop pins Uganda in almost less time than it takes me to type this sentence. Uganda isn’t Kamala in case you’re one of the many who think this. Basically he’s a Kamala imitator, as in he looks identical to him, wears the same attire, has the same paint, and wrestles just like him. Different guys though.

RVD (stoned even more than he usually is) says he was the star of his team with Sabu.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

Awesome (the champion) runs Scorpio over to start and Scorpio isn’t sure what to do. Scorpio knocks him to the ramp (the arena is strange as the aisle to the ring is on the level with the ring but the ring itself is in a kind of a pit) and hits a flip dive to take over, but back in the ring Awesome suplexes him to the floor. Scorpio is launched into the crowd and the champion dives over the barricade with a clothesline.

A chair to the back puts Scorpio back at ringside and a charge into the chair into Scorpio gets two back in the ring. Another tackle puts 2 Cold down and a clothesline knocks him inside out. This has been a total squash so far. Scorpio grabs a quick cradle for two and “hits” a superkick to set up a big top rope splash for two. A moonsault gets the same but Scorpio walks into a modified powerbomb for two.

Awesome hits a sweet release German suplex and it’s table time. It is ECW after all. Jazz, Scorpio’s manager, gets in and Scorpio has to save her from being powerbombed through the table. There’s another superkick to Awesome but Scorpio takes too much time to go up top and a HUGE powerbomb through the table kills 2 Cold dead to keep the title on Awesome.

Rating: C. I like both of these guys so I was a fan of this match before it started. This was when Scorpio was a shell of his old self when he was flying all over the place back in WCW in the early 90s. Good stuff here though as Awesome was moving around like Scorpio used to despite being bigger and taller than Scorpio ever was. Fun stuff.

Justin Credible is here to complain about Sandman having a Singapore Cane of his own. Apparently Jason, the Impact Players’ lackey, has stolen Sandman’s Cane.

Justin Credible vs. The Sandman

Sandman has what looks like a broom. After a break Sandman is going after the cane but gets caught by a baseball slide to send him into the barricade. Justin rams him into a chair in the ring but Sandman gets a shot in of his own and heads to the floor where he climbs a magically appearing ladder. He climbs the ladder and then climbs back down, making this another pointless ECW sequence.

Justin puts the ladder in the corner between the ropes and due to wrestling law #1, is sent into it himself, getting a two for Sandy. The ladder is placed on the top rope and Justin is launched into it for two. A slingshot legdrop onto the ladder onto Justin gets two again and it’s time for another table. The table is set in the corner but Credible grabs a sleeper out of nowhere. Speaking of out of nowhere, here’s Rhyno to Gore both guys through the table. The White Russian Leg Sweep would seem to get the pin but Lance Storm comes in and hits a missile dropkick on Sandman to drive a chair into his face and give Justin the pin.

Rating: D+. This is a great contrast of two kinds of matches. The world title match had a coherent story to it (mostly) and both guys were hitting almost everything they used. This was a lot messier with the weapons being the focus of the match instead of the wrestlers in the ring, which is almost never a good thing.

Post match Dreamer runs out to beat up Storm and we get a Dawn Marie vs. Francine catfight.

After a recap of the show, Dreamer yells at Raven who says he wasn’t going to help Sandman. Dreamer calls him Scotty to prove how serious he is.

Overall Rating: D+. This just wasn’t that good. Corino finally has an actual wrestler to feud with and the world title match wasn’t bad, but the focus is still completely on the tag title feud and I only have kind of an idea what’s going on. The Impact Players want the titles and Candido (not here tonight) and Rhyno want the titles and Dreamer hates Raven and Sandman is in there somewhere and Raven hates Sandman. Now one question: when are the belts going to be defended? That’s the main (of multiple) problems with this: there’s no match anywhere in sight so far. Not a horrible show but still messy.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Monday Night Raw – December 20, 1999: If You Don’t Like Stephanie And HHH, RUN AWAY VERY FAST!

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 20, 1999
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 12,063
Commentators: Jim Ross, Doc Hendrix

This is a Raw request which I don’t remember the reason for. We’re just past Armageddon 1999 and Big Show is world champion. We’re inching closer to the Rumble and I would have expected to do the January 3 show which is the one where HHH won the title from Show. I don’t remember anything specific about this show so let’s get to it.

HHH and Stephanie, who are currently in power, are in the back to open the show. The Mean Street Posse are around them. Stephanie was insanely hot at times back in the day. She says that tonight, they’re going to spread some holiday cheer around here. We’ll start with this.

Test vs. New Age Outlaws

Test jumps Billy during the entrance but Road Dogg jumps Test to take over. The Hardys/Edge/Christian are watching in the back. Roadie’s dropkick gets two on Test as the tall Canadian is in trouble. A double backdrop is countered into a double DDT from Test and the Outlaws are down. A big boot puts Billy down again as does a gutwrench powerbomb. The pumphandle to Roadie is broken up by a dropkick from Billy which gets two. Test’s nose mask is taken off and the Fameasser get the pin. This was about what you would expect it to be.

HHH and Stephanie are pleased. Edge/Christian and the Hardys come in because they’re tired of fighting each other. HHH says ok then, let’s have Edge/Matt vs. Jeff/Christian.

Post break the relatively new Kurt Angle comes in to see the bosses and HHH makes Angle vs. Viscera, which doesn’t please his wife.

Edge/Matt Hardy vs. Christian/Jeff Hardy

The Hardys come out together as do the Canadians. Edge and Matt jump the other guys to start before it’s Edge vs. Jeff to get us going officially. They head to the floor and Christian dives on Edge while Jeff slides back in and dives on Matt. Back in and Edge slams Jeff off the top while Matt hits a Razor’s Edge Bomb for two on Christian. Off to Matt vs. Jeff with the black haired one firmly in control.

Back to Edge with a snap suplex for two. The fans chant for Terri as Jeff finally gets the tag to Christian. He cleans house but hits Jeff out of instinct. In an interesting bit, everyone hits their finishers on their regular partners for two. Edge and Matt can’t quite hit Poetry in Motion, allowing Christian to hit the Unprettier on Matt followed by a 450 from Jeff for the pin.

Rating: C+. The match itself was fun but I’m not sure if the idea behind it was all that interesting. The fans weren’t all that into it because I think they just wanted to see these four have their usual awesome matches. Instead we got a pretty good match which wasn’t incredibly interesting. Still though, points for trying at least.

Moolah and Mae come in to see HHH and Stephanie. HHH makes jokes about their age before offering Mae some alcohol. He changes his mind though and says tonight there’s going to be a triple threat tag match: the Acolytes vs. the Dudleys vs. Moolah/Mae. Oh dear.

After a break here are HHH and Stephanie in the arena, apparently to give JR his Christmas gift. JR is brought into the ring and Stephanie yells at him for something in Entertainment Weekly where Vince and Rock were praised for making WWF so entertaining. HHH says he and Stephanie were the ones that made this place entertaining so let’s decorate the place accordingly. On the mini-trons next to the main screen, HHH and Stephanie’s pictures replace the Raw logo. Subtle.

Stephanie talks about how fun it was to slap JR last week but says this is going to feel even better. HHH gets behind JR as Stephanie shoves him down, sending JR to the mat. Cue Mankind who says he can’t stand anymore of this. You can tell he’s serious because he quotes Popeye. He tells HHH to pick on him instead of JR and says the McMahon-Helmsley Era kind of sucks.

Stephanie’s Santa hat gives Santa a bad name because Stephanie is a ho. Steph has to hold HHH back but HHH lets up. He says he has an idea but it takes him forever to get it out. Mankind will have a Boiler Room match tonight but it won’t be with HHH. Stephanie slaps Mankind and says Merry Christmas.

Kurt Angle vs. Viscera

This is during Kurt’s goofy period which was hilarious. Before the match he talks about the Three I’s: Intensity, integrity and intelligence. The goofy look on his face is great. Angle starts by trying to go behind Viscera but is easily bulldogged down. Viscera easily overpowers him and hits a Samoan Drop for no cover. Angle comes back with some dropkicks including one off the top. Steve Blackman, who has been having issues with Angle lately, comes out and blasts Viscera with a kendo stick for no apparent reason, allowing Kurt to hit the not yet named Angle Slam for the quick pin.

Stephanie thinks Angle is cute.

Moolah and Mae are ready.

So are the Dudleys.

The Acolytes are too.

Fabulous Moolah/Mae Young vs. Acolytes vs. Dudley Boys

The Dudleys are brand new and insane here while the Acolytes are big evil guys. D-Von tells the ladies the Dudley Commandments: Thou shall not steal, thou shall not kill, and thou shall not mess with the Dudleys. That was a good catchphrase back in the day. They rush the ring and beat the women down before the Acolytes get here. The Acolytes take their sweet time getting here before beating up the Dudleys. Moolah and Mae hit a held Bubba but he escapes and PUNCHES THEM IN THE FACE. Mae Young gets What’s Up for the pin. This was insane but perversely entertaining.

Mark Henry comes out for the save post match.

HHH gives Stephanie a present: a Santa Claus. That’s Mankind’s opponent tonight apparently. Oh dear.

Mankind vs. Santa Claus

This is in the boiler room. Mankind isn’t sure how his kids are going to handle this. The Posse shows up and jumps Mankind before he goes in and now the real fight begins. Mankind: “Did I just get beaten up by the Mean Street Posse???? That’s embarrassing!” Santa is in the boiler room and Mankind explains the rules to him but says Santa can walk out and win. Three more Santas run in and beat up Mankind but he fights them off with a trashcan.

There are two more Santas in front of the door but they’re pretty quickly dispatched. Oh those two are the Outlaws. There’s a cookie sheet in the boiler room for no apparent reason. Mankind sings some carols but another Santa pops up to hit Mankind with his sack. The final one is HHH. JR: “I’d know that nose anywhere.” Santa wins. File this one under “what are the writers on, because I want some of it.”

Al Snow wants a match with Rock and since it’s Christmas time, he gets it. This was during Snow’s odd heel period. Oh and it’s a Brahma Bull Rope match.

Intercontinental Title: Godfather vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending. The Ho’s look good tonight. Sweet goodness Godfather was over. Godfather goes off on Jericho to start and punches him down. This is pretty soon after Jericho debuted so he’s still a jerk. Jericho low bridges Godfather to send him to the floor followed by a springboard dropkick to send Godfather back to the floor again. An attempted powerbomb on the floor is countered and Godfather makes his comeback. He slams Jericho down and kicks him into the corner as Chyna comes down. With the Ho’s distracting the referee for no apparent reason, Chyna hits Godfather low so Jericho can retain. Another short match.

Terri and BB (a big chested chick) are told they’re in a Top Rope Topless Match. Basically it’s a match between two guys and when the respective guy is thrown over the top, his respective chick loses an article of clothing. The winning guy gets a shot at Jericho on Smackdown.

European Title: Val Venis vs. Hardcore Holly

Venis is defending and this is the topless thing. BB is with Val and Terri is with Holly. Apparently this isn’t for Val’s European Title so scratch the first part of the line. Before the match, Val compares women to Christmas trees: they’re pretty at first but they look great when he plugs it in. Apparently this is for the title. Ok then. HHH comes out to host this and get a better view.

Feeling out process to start but Val’s powerbomb is countered into a rana over the top, meaning both girls have to strip. They take the dresses off and we’re back to the men fighting. Holly hits the signature dropkick and sends Val over the top rope and eventually to the floor, making him the winner but not champion despite him being called the challenger more than once. As usual, since this was barely wrestling I’m not rating it.

Terri leaves and BB takes her top off but only HHH gets to see.

We get a clip from Smackdown with Rock costing Al Snow a match against Mankind due to some trickery.

Al Snow vs. The Rock

This is a Brahma Bullrope match, which means they’re tied up but it’s pin/submission to win. The place goes bonkers for Rock. Before the match, Rock says he has two choices. He can walk up the ramp and let Snow win, or he can beat Snow all over Houston. Rock starts beating Snow up before the rope is even tied up. They’re tied now and Snow is sent into the post and clotheslined down on the floor. Back inside and Snow gets a shot with the bell to the head of Rock for two.

Snow stomps on Rock as the fans are already chanting for Rock. For the life of me I don’t get why they would turn Snow heel. If there has ever been a guy who is just a bad fit as a heel, it’s Snow. Snow chokes with the rope and even tries to hang him. The announcers try to call this Rock’s signature match, even though this is one of only two or three I remember him being in.

A Samoan Drop gets two for Rock and here come the punches. Snow hits the referee low followed by a bell shot to Rock. Snow gets a chair but Rock counters into a DDT. Cue the Outlaws who are quickly dispatched. Rock loads up the Elbow but Road Dogg hits him with a chair, giving Snow a two count. Billy comes in with a Fameasser to Rock, giving Snow the unlikely pin.

Rating: D+. Considering this was a bullrope match and they were only attached for about 3 minutes, there wasn’t much in the way of the gimmick. I’m assuming the Outlaws came out because Rock is on HHH’s hit list but it’s not really clear. This wasn’t a horrible match but it was pretty overdone considering what they had to work with. The rope didn’t need to be a part of this at all.

The Posse spills stuff on Stephanie and HHH so they get a match tonight against two members of Too Cool.

Post break Tori comes in and yells about something so HHH gives Kane, Tori’s boyfriend, a world title match tonight. If he loses though, Tori has to spend the holidays with X-Pac, Kane’s current foe.

Too Cool/Rikishi vs. Mean Street Posse

For no apparent reason this is now a six man. Too Cool cleans house to start before we get down to Scotty vs. Pete (Pete Gas, Rodney and Joey Abs comprise the Posse). Some nefarious maneuvers get Scotty down, including a belly to back suplex. That gets two and it’s all downhill for the Posse from here. There’s the hot tag to Rikishi, right hand, Samoan Drop, Banzai Drop to Joey and we’re done. This was nothing.

It’s time to dance.

HHH and Stephanie talk about the main event.

WWF World Title: Kane vs. Big Show

Show is defending in case that wasn’t clear. This was when Show still had long hair and was relatively slim. HHH comes out to watch again. Kane fires away to start and hits a boot to the face. The champion comes back with a Russian legsweep for two. Stephanie is sitting on HHH’s lap in a recliner on the stage. Kane’s boot to the ribs is caught but he hits an enziguri to the face to send Show to the floor. A big clothesline off the top takes Show down but he picks Kane up and drops him on the barricade. That’s scary strength.

Show hits Kane in the back with a chair for a DQ but HHH says keep things going because it’s no DQ. Show loads up a chokeslam so Kane kicks him in the balls to escape. Kane gets thrown into the crowd for a countout but if you’re paying attention, you know what Stephanie says. HHH makes it falls count anywhere too. Kane gets launched into the barricade but comes back with a backdrop over the barricade and back to ringside for two.

They slug it out again and Show hits a belly to back suplex for a delayed two. Another slug out results in Kane being sent into the steps. Show picks up the steps but Kane dropkicks them back into Show’s face. Cue the Outlaws as Kane picks Show up for a slam, only to have to chase the Outlaws away from Tori. Show powerbombs Kane through the announce table to retain the title.

Rating: B. That’s probably high but this is by far and away the best Big Show vs. Kane match I’ve ever seen. Apparently the formula for these two to have a good wrestling match is to take the wrestling out. Battles of the giants are more fun when you have the two of them beating each other all over the place and having them break a lot of stuff. For a TV main event, this was very fun.

HHH and Stephanie gloat to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was around the time that the Attitude Era was starting to slow down a lot after 1999 was the high point of the insanity. You could see HHH vs. Rock on the horizon as the feud that sent this company to levels no one believed were possible, along with other big stars ready to go. The Radicalz would arrive in about a month for a bunch of new blood and things couldn’t be much better. This show though was going too fast for its own good but you could tell they were clearly trying which is more than you get a lot of the time anymore. Good show.

If you’re interested, I’ve done the Raw from the next week as well:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/02/18/monday-night-raw-december-27-1999-five-run-ins-two-chair-shots-and-a-ref-bump-in-a-six-minute-match/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




ECW on TNN – December 3, 1999: How Can ECW Afford A Guest Star?

ECW on TNN
Date: December 3, 1999
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,700
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

Another week, another ECW show. We’re somehow getting close to the end of this series, even though we’re barely a fourth of the way through it. The main story at the moment is Dreamer/Raven vs. the Impact Players and Raven getting beaten up even though he keeps doing the right thing. Other than that I’m sure we’ll have New Jack yelling about bald people again. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Raven’s history with Sandman who caned him last week.

Opening sequence.

After Joel and Joey do their thing, here are the Impact Players. Justin says he and Storm are the tag champions but Joey disagrees with them. Justin says guys like Candido and Rhyno take the bullets for the Impact Players, so here are the guys he mentioned plus Sunny in a great red dress. Candido says he’s responsible for the Players being here and Rhyno says screw talking and let’s fight. Dawn and Sunny have a Catfight as security breaks the guys up.

After a break, Steve Corino rants about Limp Bizkit being in concert in the next building because the music is driving him crazy. He’s going to go and yell at Bizkit. Even Jack Victory says he’s on his own in this one. Apparently this was in Illinois. Ok then.

Super Crazy vs. Ikuto Hidaka

For no apparent reason we cut to Sandman in the back where he complains about Raven and all the things Raven has done to him over the year. Back in the arena we actually get the start of the match this time. They trade hammerlocks to start Hidaka takes him to the mat and cranks on the knee, actually making Crazy limp. That’s a new one for him. We start a fast paced flip fest with neither guy being able to take over. It’s a double nip up and a standoff, drawing a round of applause.

Hidaka hits a hard kick and sends Crazy to the floor, followed by a springboard corkscrew dive as we take a break. Yes on ECW. Back with Hidada hitting a springboard tornado DDT for two. Crazy comes back with a springboard moonsault for two. Crazy fires away 20 punches in the corner but Hidaka kicks him in the arm (it was supposed to be the head) to take Crazy down for two. The Japanese guy hits a German on the Mexican for two. Hidaka’s tornado DDT is countered and Crazy kills him with a powerbomb. A moonsault gets the pin for the luchador.

Rating: C. This was the kind of match that was designed to fire up the crowd but it was nothing but a spot fest. Those kind of matches can be fun, but the lack of selling always gets on my nerves. This was way better than the previous week’s version of this though due to the lack of overbooking.

Corino is at a Limp Bizkit concert. He yells at some fans and apparently we’ll be seeing more later.

Raven says Sandman is just like Raven’s father: an abusive drunk.

Corino confronts lead singer Fred Durst. This goes on for awhile.

Cyrus talks to Jerry Lynn but Jerry won’t answer any questions about Tajiri.

Sandman vs. Raven

Dreamer is referee. They immediately (by that I mean after Sandman’s entrance and after a break) fight on the floor with Sandman sending Raven into various metal objects. Sandman puts a table up against the barricade and Raven is busted open already. As per the #1 law of wrestling though, Sandman goes through the table and both guys are down. They head inside along with two tables and two chairs.

Raven hits the drop toehold onto the chair as the fans chant for Sandman, making Bird Boy freak out. Sandy misses a slingshot dive through the table and both guys are down again. Off to a sleeper by Raven but Sandman drives both of them through another table with Raven getting the worst of it. Another table (#4 if you’re counting) is thrown in and Sandman fires off more punches.

There’s a table in two opposite corners now but Raven hits Sandman low to take over. Sandman comes back and puts Raven in front of a table before hitting a flip dive through it. Here are Candido and Rhyno who beat up everyone in sight. Both Dreamer and Sandman get Gored through tables but it only gets two for Raven.

Sandman DDTs Raven down and here’s Lori, Sandman’s ex wife who joined Raven’s cult back in the day. She hits Raven low but Francine comes out for a Catfight for DDTs Lori. Raven hits a DDT on Sandman and good grief the Impact Players come in for run in #7 or so. Justin canes Raven and the White Russian Legsweep gets the pin for Sandman.

Rating: D. As usual, we have an interesting idea going on here with Dreamer and Raven and Sandman, but the overbooking takes away anything they had going for it. Dreamer meant nothing at all here and for the life of me I’m not sure I know what’s going on in this feud. Do Dreamer and Raven ever defend the belts anymore?

We close on the Bizkit concert again, with Axl Rotten, Balls Mahoney and New Jack helping Fred Durst beat up Corino. You can’t understand a word being said in any of the promos so it doesn’t mean much anyway.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t as bad as the previous episode, but at the same time it was still a mess. With only two matches, it seems to me that there is a lot of time being wasted elsewhere. Now I get that stuff outside of matches can be good, but when you can’t understand a word being said by Corino or Durst, it doesn’t really make that big of a difference. Still though, I’d rather see that than New Jack (who didn’t go after the Baldies at all this week so I guess that was just forgotten about).

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




ECW on TNN – November 26, 1999: New York Subways Deserve Better Than This

ECW on TNN
Date: November 26, 1999
Location: Aragon Ballroom, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 3,912
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

It’s the day after Thanksgiving which means the Cowboys are probably on a losing streak. When may be a bit more surprising is that with this episode, I’ll be ¼ done with the entire series. Think about that for a minute. This show wasn’t even on the air for 60 episodes. The next PPV isn’t for a month and a half so we’ve got some time to fill. Let’s get to it.

After a very quick intro by Joel and Joey, here’s Jerry Lynn to open things up. Joey asks him if he’s in league with Tajiri and Jerry says that’s it for this interview and leaves.

Theme song.

Rhyno tells Candido that Candido needs to find him a warmup match or Candido will get the warmup beating. Sunny implies she’ll de-hornify Rhyno if he gives her ten minutes.

TV Title: CW Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam

During RVD’s entrance, we cut to New Jack in New York looking for the Baldies. New Jack flat out says he wants to rape Angel. We miss the opening of the match because of a merchandise plug. Anderson is in control to start with a headlock and left hand in the corner. Van Dam comes back with a sunset flip and spinwheel kick to take over. Another kick takes Anderson down and the cartwheel moonsault gets two. CW comes back with a superkick (WAY too popular of a move in ECW) for two and a neckbreaker for the same.

Anderson goes up but gets crotched. When has going to the top EVER gone well for someone named Anderson? Yes, they’re actually pushing him as Arn’s relative, which I hope has some tongue in cheek aspects to it here. They head to the floor with Van Dam putting him over the barricade and hitting the spinning leg to Anderson’s back. Back in and a spinebuster puts Van Dam down for two. That doesn’t seem to matter though as a few kicks put Anderson down and the Five Star retains the title.

Rating: C-. This was your normal TV Title match for Van Dam: he comes out, he gets the crowd fired up, he hits some kicks, he retains the title, the fans all say it’s way better than it really was. Anderson was supposed to be a big time heel in ECW but he never quite got anywhere with it, other than an I Quit match with Dreamer which again wasn’t as great as people make it out to be.

New Jack is still looking for the Baldies. He annoys the one person he finds on a NEW YORK CITY subway and that’s about it.

We come back to the arena and Sabu is fighting Van Dam.

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu

Why is Sabu out here? No reason given. Why are tag partners fighting? No reason given. Van Dam kicks Sabu down but gets crotched as he goes up. Sabu hits a springboard hurricanrana off the top for two. Fonzie slides in a chair which goes upside Van Dam’s head. The Triple Jump Moonsault mostly misses and we head to the floor. Van Dam dives into the crowd onto Sabu and we take a break.

Back with Van Dam on a table between the barricade and ring with Sabu diving off the top through it. Sabu slams him down in the ring…..and we take another break? Back with Sabu falling on the chair as he loads up another Triple Jump Moonsault which apparently hurt his knee. Van Dam goes after the knee and here are Candido and Rhyno to beat both guys up.

Van Dam and Sabu kick them down with chairs before Van Dam hits a flip dive over the top to take both guys out. Sabu tries a dive of his own but the knee gives out. Van Dam goes back in and works on the knee, hitting a Five Star onto the chair onto the knee. He puts on a bridging Indian Deathlock and Fonzie throws in the towel.

Rating: N/A. This is one of those matches where the match went long enough to get a rating, but there was so much other stuff going on that there is no way to fairly grade it. These two would have a title match at the PPV which Van Dam would win, but that begs the question of why give it away for free here? That’ll come up later on so we’ll get to it in a bit.

Little Guido vs. Super Crazy

Before we start what should be a good match, we go back to New Jack in the subway. He’s on the #6 train. Actually he’s in front of it so he’s already lying. Once again we miss the opening and come back to see Guido taking him to the mat. A cross armbreaker is broken up and we have a standoff. They both counter a few moves until Crazy tries a standing Lionsault but gets dropkicked out of the air.

Guido drops a knee to the face of Crazy but Crazy stops to go after Big Sal. After Crazy escapes Sal’s clutches, Guido misses a dive onto Crazy and Crazy hits an Asai Moonsault onto both of them. Back in and Guido hits a top rope Fameasser for two. The idea of selling doesn’t mean much in ECW. In a cool move, Crazy sets for a Lionsault but Guido pops up onto the ropes and hits a Russian Leg Sweep off the middle rope for two.

Crazy gets powerbombed out of the corner for two. Again the lack of selling is ridiculous. A tornado DDT puts Guido down for a delayed two. A top rope flip dive gets the same and it’s time to punch in the corner. Big Sal comes in and crushes the referee before getting ranaed by Crazy. Tajiri and Lynn come in for no apparent reason and beat up Crazy to give Guido the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t dull but it wasn’t any good. The problem here was that instead of a coherent match with any flow or psychology (or selling) to it, they were just hitting random moves on each other until the run-in which made no sense at the end. The annoying thing about ECW is that Crazy vs. Guido could be a good match but they have to overbook it so much that it loses whatever it could have going for it.

Lance Storm/Justin Credible/Rhyno vs. Tommy Dreamer/Raven/Sandman

Here’s a rematch of November to Remember’s main event, because why pay for it when you can get it for free here? Then again why would you pay for it in the first place? Back to New York and the Baldies were on another train and leave with no confrontation. Yep, that’s the payoff after all that build up. Before Sandman and Raven get here, Dreamer goes after Credible. It turns into a three on one beating and here’s Raven for the save. That goes badly for Bird Boy as Storm kicks him down. A chair is brought in and Storm goes face first into it, giving the tag champs (Dreamer and Raven) the advantage.

We have like six minutes of airtime left and Sandman hasn’t started his entrance yet. Dreamer gets double teamed by Rhyno and Storm in the ring while Credible beats on Raven on the floor. Here comes Sandman so the heels all stop what they’re doing. You know, because a guy staring at them is enough to make them stop beating on their opponents.

Sandman comes in and misses everyone before Storm superkicks him down. There’s no semblance of a match here at all as it’s just a big brawl. Dreamer piledrives Rhyno and Francine hits Storm low. Dawn does the same to Dreamer and we have a Catfight. Sandman hits the White Russian Leg Sweep on Justin for two. Raven loads up a DDT on Storm but Sandman hits his partner with the cane and Storm pins him.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t a match. It was a wild brawl with the occasional wrestling move thrown in. When you have a wrestling match for me to rate, let me know. Nothing to see here.

New Jack finds a Baldie but a single shot to the back from another one knocks him out.

Overall Rating: D. The problem with ECW on TNN is that it’s very obvious that there are only about three stories going on in the entire show. You have Sabu vs. Van Dam (with no reason given as to why they’re fighting), the Dreamer/Raven stuff, and the Baldies vs. New Jack. Other than that, there’s NOTHING going on here. If I don’t care about any of those stories, I have no reason to watch. The problem on top of that is that these stories aren’t fleshed out at all. Basically the people are fighting because they’re supposed to be fighting. That’s not good and it’s not working here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




History of Summerslam Count-Up – 1999: My Governor Can Beat Up Your Governor

Summerslam 1999
Date: August 22, 1999
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 17,130
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Well not much has changed since last year. Austin is still dominating the wrestling world, but he’d be injured very soon and get run over, leaving for a year. Tonight though, he’s facing the young stud known as HHH and Mankind in a triple threat for the belt. The only big change that’s happened is HHH and Rock have switched sides in the eternal struggle between heel and face.

Also, a lot of the Attitude Era favorites are here now, such as the APA, the hardcore title, the Big Show and Bully Gunn. Oh and Al Snow, but no one likes him. (Foley is my all time favorite. I couldn’t help it.) Angle has been there for about 4 months, Jericho has been there less than two weeks, debuting 13 days prior to this show, and Benoit and co. would show up at the end of January.

The big deal to this show is that there’s a special referee for the main event: the governor of the state of Minnesota, Jesse “The Body” Ventura!!!! This was huge at the time because he was in office at the time, so if nothing else it got a lot of mainstream publicity. Therefore, let’s get to this. Oh and one more thing: Smackdown would debut as a regular series four days after this.

We get a recap of guest referee history (coming soon to a history channel near YOU) which include Tyson and McMahon and McMahon Jr. HHH and Austin say they’ll beat up Jesse if they have to, but he says he has the power. Now we’re in the arena with a huge pyro show. Jesse is in the back with HHH and Chyna, saying that HHH has to follow the rules or he won’t be champion. We cut to Jericho from earlier today, waiting on someone. Harold Finkle comes running up and apologizes for being late.

IC/European Titles: D’Lo Brown vs. Jeff Jarrett

Yes, Brown has both titles. Jarrett comes out with Debra, who is in a bikini and a coat. He sends her back, much to the King’s dismay, but we see her with Brown who she accompanies to ringside instead. Ross tries to convince the people that the pop is for Brown and not Debra. Even I don’t buy that one Jimmy boy. They talk about Brown’s incredible weight loss as at one point he weighed over 400lbs, yet for this match he weighs in at about 250.

That really is not only impressive but should be applauded, if nothing else for the health aspect. Once again, the lady is the main focus of this match, or in this case her chest is. If her face wasn’t so unnatural looking, she’d be VERY hot instead of just having a huge chest. The match is short, yet interesting. We’re in the fast paced, more intense style that’s always fun. Here, Brown actually controls most of this, which isn’t something that you see very often actually.

Jarrett makes him look good, which is better because Jarrett would be gone within two months, heading back to WCW as a big name until they closed. Anyway, Debra gets on the apron, yet Jarrett grabs the guitar and yells at her. If he’s going to use the guitar and Debra is there, why not hit him while she has the referee? Anyway, Mark Henry runs out and helps Brown, only to nail him seconds later to give Jeff two titles. Debra wasn’t with Brown and it was a swerve, which is fine I guess. At least they didn’t’ try to make it something major.

Rating: B-. Solid opener here, with some nice intense stuff. Never been a fan of unified titles like this but I guess it’s ok. Debra was the big deal here, but unlike last year with Sable it was more subtle and it certainly wasn’t like having a big spotlight on her all night, which was a major plus. Not a great match, but good for an opener.

Edge and Christian say they’ll win the tag team turmoil match.

Tag Team Turmoil

I’ve always liked this idea. You have 6 teams. Two start and have a tag match. The losers are eliminated, and then the third team comes in. You keep going until there’s one team left. The winners get a tag title shot tomorrow night on Raw. Oh while Edge and Christian are coming out, JR is still upset about what Henry did, because D’lo was trying to help his career. My goodness what would he have been like had Brown not helped?

Anyway, we start with E/C and the New Brood, aka the Hardys, who are heels if you can believe that. The Dudleyz weren’t quite there yet, but very soon these three would start dominating the tag division as you already know. The match starts with a standard back and forth fast paced match. I’ll spare a lot of the details here as most of these are going to last about three minutes at most. It amazes me that you have these four guys and Matt is easily the least successful of them all.

Who would have believed that you have at least 13 world title reigns in there? That’s unbelievable. Anyway, we go to the floor and it gets insane. You can tell how much these four are loving this as they’re killing each other out there. When the Dudleys came in a few months or maybe even weeks, the ante would be upped even more, especially with the ladders becoming more prevalent. Anyway, Edge hits an electric chair followed by what I think is a diving elbow from Christian to eliminate the Hardys.

Out next are Mideon and Viscera. And here is where the match starts to become an issue with the time. This lasts all of two minutes so there’s not a lot I can say. It might be better for it to be short though, given the wrestling abilities or lack thereof in the new team out there. Big Daddy V is somehow more annoying here with that stupid looking yellow Mohawk of his.

He uses that spin kick which is one of his best ever, nearly hitting Edge in the shoulder. It looks impressive, but it never actually connects, at least not that I can remember. Other than that, this is exactly what you would expect. Christian gets beaten up, Edge comes in and they double team Vis before spearing Mideon for the pin, and we get team #4.

Ross is talking about how spent Edge and Christian must be. Why in the world would they be spent? They’ve been wrestling less than 10 minutes and they get about 45 seconds to rest between falls. To say they’re tired is just stupid. The next team is Droz and Prince Albert. I’ll spare you the jokes about piercings, but years later when I found out what the name meant, I wince every time I hear it.

Anyway, this is more or less a team that was just thrown together because there was nothing else to do with them, which can work just fine. The New Age Outlaws got together this way and it worked fine. Anyway, neither guy was anything special yet and for the most part, they never were period. In case you don’t know, Albert became the A-Train.

Sadly enough, Droz would be paralyzed within two months of this, never walking again for the rest of his life, at least since then. This one goes even shorter, with Edge hitting the Downward Spiral after about two minutes. This is the problem with matches like these: unless you let them go an hour, you make a lot of matches and teams just seem like wastes of time and filler.

The fifth team is the Acolytes, not yet the APA. APA was the team that lost the belts to X-Pac and Kane, the current champions, so this was their chance to get the belts back the next night on Raw. Anyway, they’re the big monsters here and one of my favorite teams at the time, at least until the Dudleyz came in a few weeks later to really breathe new life into the division, not that it really needed it at the time, but it didn’t hurt things at all really.

It’s weird to think that at the time, Simmons was by far and away the most successful of these four, yet in the end, he’ll be the least successful. They just beat the tar out of Edge before we go to a big brawl, with Christian taking over on Farooq. For no reason at all, the Hollies come down as the final team, despite not being in the match yet. I guess they just jumped too early? Anyway, Bradshaw, big clothesline, yeah.

Hollies and APA to end this, and this seems REALLY simple here. The bad team fight over who gets to beat up their opponent, which is something I’d just let them do. If they’re going to expend energy and hurt each other, why stop them? Bradshaw, the Einstein of this group, beats Hardcore up while he’s fighting with Crash.

They both do blind tags, leading to another fight. Simmons, the smart one, just lets them do it. Hardcore turns around and walks into a spinebuster for the pin. See how smart it is to just let them beat each other up? Post match, the Hollies go at it even more. Somehow they would become tag champions someday.

Rating: B-. This is a hard one to call, as it was really 5 matches in one, but there were a lot of squashes in there too. Edge and Christian were on display here, as it was obvious they were the best in the company at this point. Overall, this was fine, but it needed more time, which is saying something as it was almost 20 minutes as it was. These kinds of matches are cool in theory, but they have to be done just right. This one came close to doing that.

Show and Taker are just getting here. Yeah thanks for showing up on time.

We cut to a shot of Pepper, Al Snow’s Chihuahua. He says something about how Bossman promised to get both of them, which he eventually would.

Before the match, Road Dogg, who is billed as a big deal in the division despite winning the title only one time, He challenges the winner of the Hardcore title match for tomorrow night. The more I see of him, the more I really like him. He’s very solid in the ring, he’s great on the mic, the fans are into him, and he has a decent resume. Jericho interrupts him though, as a complete rookie at this point.

He hadn’t even been in the company two weeks at this point. Jericho is on an extension of the stage which is up in the air. This was when he was the king of the internet, kind of like Danielson is today. Everyone knew he had all kinds of talent but was being completely wasted in WCW. In a few months with Angle and Benoit being around, they would start tearing the house down every time they were in the ring together and really revolutionize the company as a whole.

You can tell they trusted Jericho a lot, as he debuted in an argument with the Rock. That’s saying a lot when you think about it. He insults Road Dogg as its clear WWF understood him FAR better than WCW did, putting him with two of the best talkers in the company immediately. He is just tearing Road Dogg apart here, as he has the entire crowd going nuts with insults. Roadie’s response: Why don’t you shut up, boy? Yeah, Jericho is light years ahead of him here.

If you can ever find it online, get a copy of Jericho and Foley’s promos together. It’s just them trading these amazing insults and one liners about each other as they both keep trying to top one another. It’s some of the funniest work I’ve ever seen.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Bossman

Roadie joins JR and Jerry for commentary for this match. He immediately threatens to punch Jerry for using the same lines over and over again, gaining cheers from half the audience. Bossman is champion by the way. They do something that’s pretty cool here, as they give Road Dogg a microphone and he follows them around the arena giving commentary. I really like his style as he sounds like a fan cracking jokes about the match as it goes.

He has a very smooth voice and he’s easy to listen to. It’s also a treat for the fans as they never get to hear anything when they’re in the arena. They go into the back and in a spot I shouldn’t laugh at, Bossman picks up Snow’s dog’s box and throws it and the dog across the floor. They fight towards a Pepsi case, which they knock over.

There was no Pepsi in it which is good because Pepsi sucks. This is actually cool as they go outside the arena and fight more. They go across the street which I’m assuming was closed off and fight on the patio of a bar. This is actually really cool when you think about it, but it easily could have gone bad had cops or something not been filled in on this and thought it was a legit bar fight.

Bossman hits him in the head with a yellow pages, which would hurt actually as those things are heavy, especially for a major city like Minneapolis and possibly St. Paul. They do a bunch of random brawling using a bunch of weapons. Snow with a moonsault off a bar. The funny part of this is I’m reviewing this on the night that IC, Norcal and D-Man got together at a bar.

For no reason at all, Road Dogg hits Bossman in the back with the nightstick, followed by Snow hitting Bossman with some pool balls, which allows Snow to pin him on a pool table. Snow runs back to the arena to check on his dog and for no apparent reason beats up Stevie Richards and Blue Meanie. In the process of this he steals a guy’s crutch, causing him to fall down.

Rating: B. This was a run of the mill hardcore match from this era, meaning it was fun. You have to grade some matches on a different kind of scale and this one of them. You can’t grade this like you would a Benoit/Angle match. For what it was, this was a fun match that worked.

Mankind and Ventura are talking. Ventura says that while Mankind is hardcore and Jess is fine with that, if Foley uses a weapon for the pin, Jesse won’t count it. This somehow turns into a political debate that I’d pay to hear.

There’s another Lion’s Den match tonight, but this one has weapons.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Tori

Now this isn’t the Torrie that hung out with Stacy. This is Tori that was just around for awhile, mainly hanging out with X-Pac. She never really did much and from what I remember was AWFUL in the ring. Looked hot though. JR apologizes in advance, knowing that it’s going to suck. They’ve been….I guess you’d call it feuding, but this is pre-Lita/Trish, meaning it’s horrible at best for the most part.

Apparently the dog wasn’t in the dog box when Bossman threw it. This makes no sense as he yelled into the cage before throwing it, but whatever. This was when Ivory was just done being Henry’s sex toy, meaning she was still quite hot as long as you didn’t see her full face. Tori is a women’s wrestler, so naturally she has a martial arts background. Here’s some examples of the epicness of this match: Ivory hits a legdrop. Tori literally does not move.

She doesn’t sell, she doesn’t react, she doesn’t do anything and it just looks bad. Ivory then shouts “get ready for the big swing.” Yes, she’s using a giant swing. The crowd is chanting Take It Off, so you get the idea. The finish…might be the worst I’ve ever seen. I’ve been a fan of wrestling for over 20 years, I’ve seen thousands of matches, and I honestly have no clue what this was supposed to be.

Tori goes for a sunset flip and botches it, leading to Ivory being back in control. That’s all fine and good. They botch it, with Ivory being pushed too far and being out of the pin. Immediately after this, they do the EXACT SAME SPOT, but this time instead of Ivory going down like she normally would, she just sits on Tori’s chest. Ivory then “covers” Tori, who’s shoulder is AT LEAST three inches off the mat, for the pin to retain.

The air was allegedly knocked out of her, but she’s up withing seconds and is just fine. Afterwards, for no apparent reason, Ivory throws her on her stomach and starts to unhook her top. While I’m not complaining…actually yes I am. This makes no sense at all other than to embarrass him I guess, but still what’s the point?

She gets it off but before she can fulfill her latent lesbian desires, Luna freaking Vachon, who I swear has been with the company forever, runs out for the save. It went nowhere as far as I can remember.

Rating: F. Oy this was bad. Tori is just flat out awful and while Ivory would become good, she wasn’t there yet. This was just terrible in any and all forms, with the ending being one of the worst I’ve ever seen. Terrible match to say the least.

Rock is with Michael Cole and embarrasses him, as it’s the best thing Cole did. Rock is just amazing here as he’s at his best, just before his hottest period, his summer long feud with HHH in 2000 over the title. For some reason tonight though, he’s against Billy Gunn, who is shown coming in with someone under a sheet.

We get a very different kind of video package, with Lawler and Ross doing prerecorded stuff which just sounds different. It’s odd to hear those two doing voiceover work. Anyway, basically both guy thinks they’re better with weapons than the other, so we have this to determine it.

Lion’s Den: Steve Blackman vs. Ken Shamrock

They start with Blackman pulling nunchucks from his tights which he swings very well. This is more or less a martial arts match in a cage with weapons. It’s actually cool to see two guys that can do this kind of stuff, but I don’t want to see the weapons in there. Seeing these two trying to choke each other out and kicking the heck out of each other would be fun based on the short bits that they do here. I think you can only win by KO or tapping.

We get a kendo stick brought in. So far the weapons use is limited, which makes this a lot better for me. Blackman was ok I guess, but he just bored me to tears a lot of the time. I hated his time as hardcore champion. Those sticks he would use just drove me insane. As I restart the video after typing that, he’s got the sticks. This fight is ok, but I’m still not sold on the weapons stuff. This is kind of like MMA I guess, but only parts of it.

It’s close to a hybrid I guess you could call it, and that’s just fine. This cage is really small actually. Blackman is dominating, but he keeps letting Shamrock get up and it’s just kind of pointless looking. Shamrock’s belly to bellies are just freaking sick looking. Shamrock kills Blackman with the kendo stick to knock him out and end this. Shamrock celebrates to end this segment.

Rating: B-. This is a very hard one to grade as I could see people loving it, liking it or hating it. I could certainly get the argument of there’s no point to having this on a wrestling show and there’s a certain amount of truth to that. However, there’s certainly wrestling in there, and while I’d prefer no weapons, this was fine I thought.

We get a recap of Shane attacking Test on Heat. This was a very cool angle that I always liked, which directly led to the McMahon-Helmsley Era the next year. Here’s the idea: Vince McMahon, back in the spring, had a stable called the Union, comprised of Test, Shamrock, Big Show and Mankind. They were there to simply help him fight off Taker and the Ministry. The reason you’ve never heard of them was they disbanded after literally a month.

Anyway, one night Stephanie was kidnapped and the Union rescued her. Due to this, Vince granted them all a favor of their choice. Most of them picked matches, but Test said he wanted a date with Stephanie. He got what he wanted, and they became an onscreen couple. Now you have to remember at this time, Test was something like John Morrison is now: young, cool looking, a tough guy, and looking like the next big thing.

Shane, being the big brother, decides that a wrestler isn’t good enough for his sister. Let the HHH jokes begin. Anyway, Stephanie yells at him to stay out, so he gets his friends, the Mean Street Posse, to help him fight Test. Naturally, he beats the tar out of all of them and gives them all injuries. Eventually we get to this: Shane vs. Test in a Love Her or Leave Her Greenwich Street Fight. The idea is simple: if Test wins, Shane stays out of their relationship. If Shane wins, they break up.

Street Fight: Shane McMahon vs. Test

The MSP comes out before we get started, all bandaged up etc. There just happens to be a couch waiting on them. Test has bad ribs btw. Within a minute they’re already out in the crowd. Naturally the Posse is already interfering, but Test throws Shane into them. Stephanie, pre implants, is watching in the back. There’s a mailbox next to the Posse, so of course they use it in the match. It’s more or less a standard street fight.

The crowd is way into Test here, so I’ve always wondered why he never took off. We go back to the ring and Shane busts out a freaking  corkscrew moonsault from the top. Every time he’s in the ring he does something impressive and this is no exception. It looks great to say the least. It missed, but it looked great. Test misses a boot and kicks the heck out of the referee. Shane hits the elbow through the table.

That’s the real battle here: who has the better top rope elbow drop? For some reason in a match where there are no rules, the referee has to be distracted. That’s just kind of pointless don’t you think? Back in, Test kicks out to a big pop. For the life of me I don’t get why they dropped his push. He seems to be really over, at least in this match. More or less this is a four on one match, but it’s three jobbers and a part time wrestler.

This really shouldn’t be too much of a challenge, but they’re making it work. The Stooges are here to make the save though, as you don’t mess with the Real Americans. They beat up 2 of the Posse, allowing Test to kick the 3rd in the head, then beat the tar out of Shane with a SWEET looking elbow for the pin. Stephanie runs out to celebrate.

Rating: B. This was a very good street fight. The Posse interfering makes perfect sense as Shane isn’t a polished wrestler and would need help to win. The crowd was WAY into this too. There were good weapons spots, big moves and a solid ending. In short, this was very good and very fun.

Anyway, moving on we have the recap of the tag title match, which is the new champions Kane and X-Pac vs. Big Show and Undertaker. Taker was probably the most evil in his entire career at this point, more or less being the devil. This was around the time that X-Pac was trying to humanize Kane, which never really worked. These kinds of matches are why X-Pac gets the reputation he gets.

Against guy his size he works really well and he’s a fun guy to watch. However, putting him in the ring with three guys whose smallest is the 6’10 328lb Undertaker just does not work at all. He looks out of place and you get into the area where it’s about his heart, which makes even less sense. Also, the X Factor was a horrible move.

It’s a facebuster for those of you unfamiliar with it. For someone his size he needs to be using the ropes for a big high impact move. Those two things changed, Waltman could have been a decent guy. Instead, he’s more or less universally hated, which I don’t think is fair.

Tag Titles: X-Pac/Kane vs. Big Show/Undertaker

The announcers are asking about whether or not the challengers can trust each other. Kane has a different outfit which is his old red and black but inverted. It looks fairly awesome. Taker’s music is just freaking SWEET around this time. For some reason this feels like a No Mercy match to me. I mean the N64 game that is. Not sure why that’s the case but it feels like one.

Basically, this is what you’d expect: faces clean house to start and it gets down to Pac vs. Taker, but the size gets the better of it until Kane comes in. They do a spot that I really like as Taker is about to chokeslam Pac through the table but Kane just pulls him in over the top rope. I think I’m getting where the NM aspect comes in. Kane would be the first player, saving his much weaker partner from the other two guys on Expert mode.

He hits a move, goes for a cover, and saves his partner. Eventually he starts to get beaten down though, as would be expected I suppose. Watching Taker and Kane fight is almost always fun. The history there just makes it fun. It’s odd to see Kane as the face, and there’s a joke there somewhere, vs. Taker as the heel. Just realized the flaw in my No Mercy analogy: Big Show wasn’t in it, and Taker was a biker.

Pac gets in and finally gets the beating that we all knew was coming. The main thing here of course is the heart of X-Pac which I think I’ve mentioned before. Anyway, Show beats on him for awhile but since he hasn’t had a twinkie (I’m sure Rhodes or DiBiase would do) in awhile, he goes to the resthold of doom. We get one of the moves I’ve always hated: the Bronco Buster. DAng can someone just shoot whoever made that move?

Pac kicks out of a Showstopper and Taker is TICKED. He tags himself in, punches the small one, and tombstones the living ehck out of him to get the tag titles. The belt looks small in Show’s hands.

Rating: D+. This just didn’t do it for me. I mean, I know the ending to about 95% of these matches, but a lot of them get me into it. This simply didn’t at all. It was just there and it wasn’t interesting, there was no drama, and it didn’t work. I think the issue here is you have three guys that combine to be over 1000 pounds, and then someone that barely clears 200.

The problem is that there’s far too much of a difference between the sizes and it just didn’t work for me. It would be the Rock N Sock Connection that would take the belts from these monsters in I think about three weeks.

Ventura gives his same speech to Austin.
Rock vs. Billy Gunn

There’s something about if Gunn wins Rock has to kiss up to him. This was a really weird period for Rock as he was over, but Austin was just way too big of a star for Rock to get that top spot. The neck surgery was coming, and Rock would be launched so far into the stratosphere that you couldn’t see him anymore. By the way, this is being written just after Night of Champions ended, so if there’s some anti-Hardy remarks in here, don’t be surprised.

Anyway, Rock was thrown into stupid feud after stupid feud, even being paired with Gangrel for all of a minute. That should speak volumes for how out there they were with him. Anyway, Gunn has a fat lady with him, saying if Rock loses he kisses her, not his, so the ending is pretty obvious already. There was no point to this feud but it filled Rock’s time I guess. Billy Gunn…..where do I begin? This guy was given so many pushes and he never could get it right.

Somehow, this was his most successful gimmick. They’re on the floor and Rock puts King’s crown on Gunn before punching him. Why has no one ever used that as a weapon? If a cookie sheet hurts, that has to have some force behind it. For some reason, Lawler starts going over the possible types of underwear that the fat lady could be wearing. Ross’ reactions are just funny here.

They do the standard near falls, with Rock taking the Fameasser, which for you young guys that don’t know, it’s what Cena does with the leg drop from the top, but Billy just got a running start. It always sucked though as he never got the leg in the right place. Eventually, the woman comes in and sets up in the corner, and you know what’s coming. Yes, Billy takes it which makes the woman smile. Rock is on fire here, drilling the Rock Bottom and the Elbow, as the fans are losing it.

Rating: B-. Seriously, the guy headlines Mania and this is the best they can do for him at the second biggest show of the year? That’s just kind of pathetic. Anyway, this was pretty bland, with no one thinking Rock would lose, but unlike in the Hardy/Punk match, they got the booking right! Ok I think I’m good now. Anyway, Rock wins, he looked good, he got the big pop, and his time was coming, but no one knew it yet.

Oh great. Now I get to recap the buildup for the main event. Sit back, because this might be the most complicated story outside of TNA in wrestling history. Ok, so one night, there was supposed to be a triple threat match to determine the #1 contender for Summerslam, but we didn’t know who the 3rd person was. We had HHH and Taker, but no third person. Commissioner HBK decided that the third person was Chyna.

Now, earlier in the night, someone had jumped Austin and hurt him. Austin shows up at the end of the show with a chair and kills HHH with it, implying he’s the one. It’s a hardcore match, so Austin throws Chyna onto HHH, making her the #1 contender. From what I remember reading, there was actually a debate going on about not only having Austin vs. Chyna, but actually GIVING HER THE TITLE.

Luckily, this lasted all of 9 seconds though as they came back to reality. Anyway, HHH is mad about this, as at the time he was completely obsessed with being the WWF Champion. It was one of the best builds for someone being desperate to be champion that I’ve ever seen. His theme music was My Time at the moment, so everything for him was about claiming his destiny as WWF Champion.

The next week, we got HHH vs. Chyna for the spot. For no reason that I can remember at all, Mankind runs out and hits HHH with the stairs, allowing Chyna to pin him. THEN the next week, Mankind says that he wants a piece of the Summerslam action, and due to the obvious sexual tension between he and Chyna (find this promo. I don’t ever recall laughing so hard at wrestling as the look on Chyna’s face is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.)

Anyway, Mankind wins, but THEN Shane returns to announce that right here and right now, we’re having a no holds barred match to determine the undisputed #1 contender for Summerslam. HBK and Shane are both referees. Mankind gets the Claw on HHH, but the Game lands a belly to back onto a chair and we get a double pin.

Note: in one of the funniest and stupidest things I’ve ever heard, during this package (pun coming), we hear every curse word I can think of that you can say on TV, yet they censor Chyna saying balls. This amazed me to no end.

WWF Title: Steve Austin vs. Mankind vs. HHH

Before the match, Jesse cuts a short but great promo, talking about how the media has said that he’s a disgrace to the office for being there. He says he’s proud he was a wrestler and he’s proud to be here tonight. That is just awesome. You have to stop and think for a second: at the time, Ventura was the governor of Minnesota. This wasn’t some American Idol guy or NBA impersonator.

This is a major politician, who was considered a dark horse candidate for the White House. Another person called a dark horse candidate in the past: President Obama. Just think about that. Imagine 4 years ago having Barack Obama refereeing the main event of Summerslam and clearly being excited about it and not just waving and looking like he’d rather pound a rusty spike into his face.

You can tell Jesse is having fun up there and wants to be there. That’s a nice thing to see. For the most part, people that are wrestlers are proud of it and it’s not just something you do and then don’t do. Oh apparently Foley is in this because HHH injured his knee with the hammer. We get the shots of the walk towards the entrance, which I’m not sure if I like or not. Nothing beats the shot of the fans when the music hits, and I don’t want to see the guys before that.

HHH was wearing some weird vest made of chain link around this time. I never got the point of that. Foley’s pop is actually very solid so you know he’s still over, which is odd as he would be retired in about 8 months. Austin’s pop is MASSIVE. Foley is very smart here, staying on the floor at first and letting Austin and HHH fight. That’s brilliant, and it’s coming from one of the craziest wrestlers of all time.

Austin and Mankind beat up HHH, so Mankind hugs him and offers a handshake. Right hands follow. It’s your standard wild brawl to start with HHH and Austin doing most of the work. Wow. Upon a bit of research, Austin is only 34 here. It’s hard to think that his career was mostly over at this point. Chyna interferes and low blows Mankind, so Jesse throws her out.

The cool thing about Ventura is that he was always a guy that wasn’t afraid of anyone, and as a Navy SEAL, you knew he was tough. He’s perfect for this and has to be the best guest ref I can think of. Mankind and HHH work together, which you’ll never hear again. This match is just kind of going with the motions so far and while it’s good, it’s not great. HHH sets for what might have been a figure four while Mankind drops a leg.

It’s Hogan and Flair vs. Austin. This partnership lasts all of 18 seconds and it ends with a Cactus clothesline before Mankind runs across the apron and flips onto HHH. Mankind is doing flippys. Maybe he does belong in TNA. HHH is working on Austin’s bad knees which makes sense. Austin and HHH go into the crowd as Foley follows. You know one day someone needs to land a piledriver on the floor.

We always get it teased but we never see it. MORE VIOLENCE DANG IT! Foley takes a good stunner. He just falls to the side, plain and simple. HHH breaks it up with a chair, and Jesse says he won’t count it. That’s just awesome on so many levels. Shane slides in to break up the fight between HHH and Jesse. The mouth on Jesse could rival Austin’s if my lip reading is working. Jesse throws Shane over the top as I’m loving this. This is just awesome.

He says that was for your old man you little bastard. Vince vs. Jesse NEEDS to happen. Who cares if they’re both senior citizens? Correction: Jesse is….58? WOW. I would have had him pushing social security. So….wow he was in his late 40s here? That explains a lot. Late 30s as well for the Mania stuff? I’m impressed. Mankind breaks up the pin on the stunner as we’re running very low on time.

HHH gets the pedigree, but Foley breaks it up and hits the double arm on Austin to win the title and shock the world. The fans are almost dead silent for about ten seconds, then go nuts as someone not named HHH is champion. HHH is just losing it in the corner as Jesse hands Foley the title. HHH lands about ten chair shots to the legs of Austin as he can’t believe he didn’t get the belt again.

He’d win the next night on Raw, with the rumor being that he was supposed to get it here, but Austin refused to job for him. That’s never been confirmed one way or the other though, and since this was the Attitude Era, it certainly could be wrong.

Rating: B+. This just didn’t have the main event feeling to it. Jesse definitely lived up to the hype here as he was about as good as you can get for a special guest referee. The match itself was good, but the ending was out of nowhere. It wasn’t bad or anything, but this was the definition of a swerve.

NO ONE saw this coming as the stars aligned for HHH on this night it seemed. Anyway, Foley winning was a nice surprise and kind of his last hurrah, saying that he still had it before the completely underrated feud with HHH started in about 2-3 months time.

Overall Rating: B-. This show was good, but just good. The matches are good enough, the main event was a twist, the fans were happy I suppose and there were some fun moments, but there’s no big spark to make it a great show. This would have been awesome as something like Judgment Day or No Way Out, but for Summerslam, it’s just a good show.

Mild recommendation, as it’s your traditional Attitude Era stuff: if you like this era you’ll love it and if you’re not a fan you’ll be very mildly entertained but get bored at some parts. It’s ok, but just barely.

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