Smackdown
Date: July 21, 2006
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and that means it is time to put the finishing touches on everything. The show is looking pretty good on paper and if they do everything else well tonight, we could be in for a nice pay per view. That’s in theory of course, as you never know around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Teddy Long is in the ring to open things up and gets straight to the point: Mark Henry is injured and has undergone knee surgery. Therefore he is of course out the #1 contenders match at the Great American Bash, so we have a replacement. Before Long can make the announcement, here’s Mr. Kennedy to interrupt. Long won’t let him have the mic but Kennedy has his own and challenges Batista for the pay per view. Cue Batista to tell Teddy to book the match (Teddy nods) because he needs someone to take out his six months of anger on. Kennedy offers a handshake but pulls it again and leaves. Quick and easy here.

Brian Kendrick vs. Kid Kash

They run the ropes to start with neither being able to hit anything until Kendrick armdrags him into an armbar. Kash gets smart by going after the knee and a running clothesline gets two. It’s back to the leg with even more kicks, followed by something like a reverse figure four to send Kendrick bailing to the ropes.

A snapmare sends Kendrick’s legs into the ropes to stay on the legs but Kendrick is back up with right hands and a clothesline. Jamie Noble offers a distraction but gets knocked down by mistake, allowing Kendrick to grab a rollup for two. The referee goes to yell at Paul London, allowing Noble to come in to help set up the Dead Level for the pin.

Rating: C. The leg work was a wise way to go and it made sense to have the champ lose here, but at the same time there is only so much to be gotten out of the singles matches for the Tag Team Champions. I’m not exactly buying the idea of the Pit Bulls winning the titles on Sunday, but at least they’re trying something to set it up.

Chavo Guerrero is in Teddy Long’s office when King Booker and Queen Sharmell come in. They don’t like being disrespected by Rey Mysterio and demand satisfaction in the form of a match tonight. Chavo doesn’t think much of this and tells Teddy to ignore them, but he’ll take it under advisement. That’s too much for Chavo, who storms off.

Post break, Rey accepts the match with Booker for tonight. Chavo doesn’t like this.

Michelle McCool/Kristal vs. Jillian Hall/Ashley

Jillian slams Kristal down to start and hits a cartwheel elbow as JBL goes into a rant about Jillian not taking the easy path to wealth. Michelle comes in and beats on Ashley as a lot of screaming ensues. It’s back to Kristal for a rollup but Jillian makes the save, ripping Kristal’s top off in the process. Ashley rolls her up for the fast pin as the point was obvious again here.

Great American Bash press conference video.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari to say that Undertaker will be destroyed in the Punjabi Prison. It won’t be for the first time either, as we see a clip of Khali mauling Undertaker at Judgment Day.

After looking at a clip of Finlay stealing the US Title from him last week, Bobby Lashley says he is ready to fight tonight.

US Title: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is challenging and they go straight to the brawling. Finlay gets powered down early on and claims an early elbow injury. Naturally he’s goldbricking and forearms Lashley down for two, causing the referee to chastise him a bit. One heck of an uppercut sends Lashley into the corner and a very hard clothesline puts him down. Finlay hammers away in the corner and a jumping seated senton sets up the chinlock.

Lashley fights up and they head outside with Finlay being sent head first into the apron. That earns Lashley a knee first whip into the steps though and it’s time to crank on the leg back inside (JBL: “It’s the Achilles Heel of a gigantic monster.”). Finlay cannonballs down onto the knee, ala Ric Flair, which Cole calls unorthodox for some reason. Lashley fights up again but here’s William Regal for a distraction.

The distraction lets Finlay pull out the Leprechaun, with Finlay tossing him at Lashley for some actual unique offense. The leglock goes on again but Lashley fights up with the variety of suplexes. That’s enough for the referee to check on Finlay, allowing Regal to get in some cheap shots. Regal throws Finlay a chair, which is kicked into his face, setting up the spear. Not that it matters though as Regal comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was about taking a couple of heavy hitters and letting them beat the heck out of each other for about fifteen minutes. It’s a good preview for Sunday’s triple threat title match also involving Regal, and I’m glad they didn’t do a surprise title change to give Lashley another two day reign. Finlay can get a lot out of being the champion and retaining here was the smart move.

Post match the beatdown is on with the Leprechaun getting in a shillelagh shot to keep Lashley down.

Here’s Miz to recap the Diva Search so far, all two weeks of the thing. Tonight’s contest is a Diva Dance Off so they all dance for thirty seconds. Some of them are a bit more skilled than others (Maryse just kind of walks around) and Milena wins. This was exactly as you would have expected.

Matt Hardy, Funaki and Tatanka are in the back when Sylvan comes in to pitch a Quebec vacation.

Super Crazy vs. Psicosis

Gregory Helms is on commentary as he will be defending the title at the Bash against an opponent to be determined. Psicosis takes over with an armdrag to start and stomps away but Crazy sends him into the corner for some stomping of his own. A reverse Boston crab has Crazy in trouble and Psicosis makes it even worse by turning it into a Rocking Horse. We go to a more conventional camel clutch but Crazy slips out and dropkicks him to the floor. Crazy hits a middle rope moonsault but walks into a spinwheel kick for two back inside. Not that it matters as Crazy grabs a crucifix for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Much like the Lashley vs. Finlay match, this was all about taking two people who are good at a certain style and allowing them to do their thing for a bit. I’m not sure how big of a surprise that Crazy winning was, but at least they got a few minutes to do their thing. Crazy vs. Helms at the Bash feels like a pre-show match, but it’s nice to see the title defended every now and then.

Post match Crazy and Helms shout at each other a lot.

Vito went shopping. Again.

Great American Bash rundown.

Rey Mysterio vs. King Booker

Non-title with Sharmell handling Booker’s entrance. Joined in progress with Booker taking him to the mat with a knuckle lock but Rey fights up and kicks at the leg (popular move tonight). A flying headscissors looks to set up the 619 but Rey knocks him outside instead, setting up the running seated senton off the apron.

Back in and Booker chops away, followed by an elbow to the face for two. A pair of clotheslines into a superkick gives Booker two and the armbar goes on. That doesn’t last long so Booker grabs a slingshot suplex for two more. The chinlock doesn’t stay on long either, meaning this time it’s a World’s Strongest Slam for another near fall on Rey.

Back up and Rey grabs the sitout bulldog and thanks to the referee checking on Sharmell, Rey baseball slides Booker for a low blow. Sharmell offers a distraction though and it’s a Book End for two as Rey puts his foot on the floor. Cue Chavo to trip Booker though and it’s the 619 into Dropping The Dime to put Booker away.

Rating: C. Kind of a boring match but you can tell that these are both people who can have a fine match almost in their sleep. I’m not wild on having the pay per view main event two days before the show, but it’s not like it is the focal point in the first place. Mysterio’s days are numbered and it seems obvious, especially with Guerrero running around on the floor like he was here. Fine main event, but still a weird way to go.

Overall Rating: C-. This show suffered from the same kind of problem that so many other go home shows face: the show is built up as well as it’s going to be, leaving this show as little more than a two hour filler episode. There was nothing of note added here, other than replacing the injured Henry, so while it was a perfectly watchable show, it was also a perfectly skippable show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: July 18, 2006
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

It’s time for another guest star, mainly because Kurt Angle is on hiatus and Rob Van Dam is suspended, leaving no one to challenge Big Show. This time around it’s the Undertaker, who seems like someone who could thrive in the hardcore stuff. Then again you never can really tell with this stuff so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with Kelly’s Expose and it’s the same as always, with Mike Knox interrupting. They head to the ring, with Knox saying what is about to happen is due to her.

Mike Knox vs. Sandman

Fallout from Sandman attacking Knox last week. Sandman busts himself open with the beer can so Knox jumps him from behind to start and takes things outside for the brawl. A whip into the barricade sets up some elbow drops to keep Sandman down and they head back inside. Sandman hits a bulldog to send Knox outside and it’s time for the cane. Naturally he hits Kelly by mistake, allowing Knox to hit a low blow for the fast pin.

Knox leaves the unconscious Kelly at ringside. The replay shows that Knox pulled Kelly in the way of the cane shot.

Shannon Moore is coming.

During the break, Kelly was stretchered out.

Here’s Paul Heyman, flanked by the riot guards, for a chat. Heyman says his children all have to drink the Kool Aid from the same glass. Last week he explained suspending Rob Van Dam to protect himself but now he hears confusion. Cue Tommy Dreamer to interrupt, with Heyman looking a bit confused.

Dreamer says he has been with Heyman since the beginning and now he wants an explanation of what Heyman is doing. Everyone is confused so what is going on? Heyman kisses Dreamer on the mouth and here’s Test to run Dreamer over with the big boot. The TKO leaves Dreamer laying, as Joey thinks Test might be working for Heyman. Maybe. It’s possible.

Balls Mahoney says with his name, you have to be extreme. He may be a bit nuts, but he likes things that way.

Sabu vs. Stevie Richards

Non-extreme rules (because that worked so well last time) rematch from Saturday Night’s Main Event (because that worked so well last time). The fans want tables but get a headlock from Sabu, who is driven into the corner for the break. Stevie stomps him down and puts on an armbar but that’s broken up in a hurry. A running leg lariat drops Richards for two and a tornado DDT plants him again. The camel clutch makes Richards tap.

Rating: D. I know you have to have these people on the show to make it feel like ECW (or at least in name only) but these guys feel so tacked on. The previous segment felt important, but Sandman felt like a pest for Knox to beat up and this felt like WWE saying “There. Happy now?”. They aren’t even hiding it that much anymore and the sooner they cut the cord, the better.

CM Punk talks about his background in various martial arts, which make him so much more of a dangerous wrestler. It’s almost weird to see him with the longer hair.

The vampire introduces the tarot card reader as Ariel, who shows us the death card and her bloody neck.

Video on Big Show’s path of destruction.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging and this feels so wrong. Show drives him into the corner and unloads with elbows so Undertaker evens things up with kicks to the ribs. The slugout gets the fans into things a bit so Show headbutts him down to cut them off. They trade big boots for a double knockdown and Show sends him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Undertaker hitting a Stunner over the top rope but getting kneed down for two. Undertaker’s own headbutt just hurts him again and Show takes it to the floor for a second time.

Undertaker is sent head first into the steps but he’s back with elbows to the face. Another headbutt takes Undertaker down back inside but this time he pulls Show into a kneebar. That’s broken up as well and Show pounds him down, only to charge into a boot in the corner. Old School is broken up though and it’s a superplex to give Show two….as Undertaker sits up. Undertaker’s chokeslam is broken up and there’s another headbutt. The cobra clutch is countered as well and now Old School can connect. Cue Great Khali to go after Undertaker, with Big Show joining in for the double countout.

Rating: C-. It was your run of the mill Undertaker vs. Big Show match and that’s your first big problem. These two work out well enough against each other but at the same time, it’s something that has been done so many times that it doesn’t exactly draw much interest. Undertaker down in ECW feels like one of the times he would challenge for the Intercontinental Title, as it almost feels like he got lost on the way to his real match.

Post match Undertaker isn’t having any of this and starts wildly swinging a chair, only to get beaten down again. A double chokeslam through the announcers’ table ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. This show really felt like they didn’t have any idea what they were doing and just threw a bunch of stuff together to fill in their allotted time. ECW really doesn’t serve much of a purpose and it isn’t getting much better, meaning I’m not sure where this show is going to go. Wherever it is, it needs to be an upgrade from here though, because things are getting rough.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 17, 2006
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Saturday Night’s Main Event and as a result, absolutely nothing has changed. Therefore, it’s time to get ready for Summerslam and John Cena challenging Edge for the Raw World Title seems to be a likely choice. That is the kind of match that deserves the big stage and hopefully that’s exactly what it gets. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

D-Generation X joins us with a special message: a video recapping them being mean to Vince McMahon over the last few weeks. It’s not much funnier in a big video package either.

Here’s DX, featuring hometown boy Shawn Michaels, for a chat. Actually we make that a discussion of which shirt they are supposed to be wearing tonight. HHH thought they were wearing the old one, available at the merchandise stands and WWEShop.com. Michaels thinks it’s the new one, which is also available at the merchandise stands and WWEShop.com, though he has to read his locations off his wrist. HHH: “Easy there Miz.”

With the important stuff out of the way, Shawn has heard that Vince McMahon is kind of mad at them but they aren’t sure why. HHH takes a quick poll of the audience about whether or not they should stop. HHH: “Now come on Shane. Uh, Shawn. It’s live TV give me a break.” Besides, there’s no way the people here, in Shawn’s hometown of San Antonio, Texas, would want to see DX face the McMahons in a tag match tonight.

The fans disagree so HHH thinks we should make the match. Cue the McMahons, with Vince calling DX a bunch of degenerate juvenile delinquents. Vince says tonight, we’ll have Shawn vs. Shane, which seems to take the latter by surprise. Shane didn’t like Shawn’s impression, because he DOES NOT dance around like a midget on crack. Tonight, instead of the Alamo, these people will remember Shane beating Shawn 1-2-3. The DX plugs are always worth a chuckle.

Carlito vs. Shelton Benjamin

The winner gets a future Intercontinental Title show (or Cruiserweight Title shot according to the introductions). Shelton headlocks him down to start and the armbar is on in a hurry. That’s reversed into an exchange of rollups for two each before Shelton kicks him in the face for two. The chinlock is on in a hurry and Shelton switches to right hands and choking like a villain should.

It’s off to a sleeper, which is broken up in a hurry so Carlito can hit a clothesline. A springboard back elbow gives Carlito two but the Backstabber is countered. Shelton grabs a cradle but can’t reach the rope. Instead, Carlito reverses into one of his own and successfully grabs the rope for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see in this one and the ending was hardly in doubt after Carlito beat Nitro in the mixed tag on Saturday. There was no need to do anything tricky here and going with Carlito as the next challenger makes as much sense as anyone else. You can always use some fresh stars so pushing someone as a new face is worth a shot.

We look back at John Cena beating Edge via DQ on Saturday, though he did put Edge through the announcers’ table to continue the feud.

Trish Stratus hits on Carlito, who declares that cool.

This Week In Wrestling History: The Brawl To End It All. Yeah that was pretty big.

Trish Stratus/Torrie Wilson vs. Mickie James/Victoria

Candice Michelle is guest referee for obvious reasons. Mickie drops Torrie in a hurry and Trish has to be held back to break up some interference. Victoria’s dancing moonsault takes too long to set up though and it’s off to Trish to take over. Victoria whips Mickie into the corner but misses Trish, only to have Mickie break up the Stratusphere. Candice doesn’t like the interference and throws Mickie outside, leaving Trish to hit Stratusfaction for the pin on Victoria. Short match with an obvious point.

Armando Alejandro Estrada isn’t worried about Umaga facing John Cena tonight. Umaga has no comment on the subject, though he does shout after Estrada hits his catchphrases.

Mick Foley joins us from WWE Studios and yes, this is the shirt he wore when he was interviewed by Katie Couric. For now though, Foley wants to talk about Ric Flair, who remembers beating Foley two straight falls at Vengeance. Foley remembers it as Flair being left bloody and broke, which was Foley’s plan all along. That’s why Flair is getting no rematch, as Foley has nothing left to prove.

Charlie Haas and Viscera are not explaining their actions against Lilian Garcia last week.

We recap the Diva Search Boot Camp from Smackdown.

Highlanders vs. Jared Steel/Russell Simpson

Steel and Simpson jump the Highlanders from behind and the fight is on in a hurry. That’s about it for the offense as Robbie headbutts Simpson down and it’s time for Fun With Kilts. The Scot Drop finishes Simpson in a hurry.

Post match the Highlanders challenge the Spirit Squad for the Tag Team Titles. Unlike the Squad, they have something beneath their kilts.

Post break, DX meets the Highlanders and tells them to go meet Vince in his office. Make yourselves at home, shout in his ear, and hug him a lot. More on this later I assume.

John Cena vs. Umaga

Armando Alejandro Estrada is here with Umaga but Cena jumps him in the corner before the bell. Umaga shrugs it off and sends Cena flying through the chalkboard as the bell rings. A piece of the board goes over Cena’s back and the beating is on in a hurry. Cena tries to fight back but a shot to the throat cuts him right back down. A knee to the chest keeps Cena in trouble and his quick STFU attempt doesn’t work.

Umaga runs him over with a clothesline and here are Edge and Lita to watch Cena being tied in the Tree of Woe. The running headbutt connects but the running hip attack only hits corner. Cena goes after Edge, earning him a whip into the steps from Umaga. The top rope splash misses though and Cena slugs away, even managing the ProtoBomb. There’s the Shuffle but Edge comes in, allowing Umaga to hit a superkick into the Samoan Spike for the pin.

Rating: C. They kept this moving and while Umaga won with some interference, he still beat Cena and that is quite the accomplishment for someone who has only been around for a few months. Cena vs. Edge will be the big showdown at Summerslam, but Umaga got a lot out of this win. They’re trying something new here and hopefully it works out well for everyone.

Vince comes into his office and throws the Highlanders out for eating his food. One of them gives him a spank on his way out, which makes Vince jump.

Randy Orton vs. Eugene

Eugene’s jacket still has the green paint from last week. Orton takes him down in a hurry as the HOGAN chants start up. Eugene gets in a shot of his own and mocks Orton’s pose, earning himself a heck of a clothesline. The backbreaker into the RKO finishes Eugene in a hurry.

Post match Orton tells Eugene to never take advantage of the McMahons again. He would never take advantage of Brooke Hogan like that, because she’s a very pretty girl. Orton likes that song About Us, but he would like to show us his favorite hit. We see Orton giving Hulk Hogan the RKO onto the back of a car on Saturday, which somehow confused Brooke. I mean I know the Hogans are gullible but come on now.

Back in the WWE Studios, Mick Foley gives Melina a shout out and talks about how impressive Ric Flair was in his hardcore match. Flair got extreme, so maybe next week he can wear a flannel shirt or drive a minivan! Foley sings a little Michael Jackson to say that Flair is out of his life but here’s Flair in the arena to interrupt. Flair is bandaged up and shows us a clip of his match with Big Show on ECW. Flair: “That would be an a** whooping and a half!”

Here’s Miz for the first elimination in the Diva Search. Amy is eliminated and we’re having a Diva Dance Off this week on Smackdown.

Vince is annoyed at DX, and Shane finding an “I HEART COCKS” sign on his back makes it worse. Shane’s sign says “ME TOO”.

Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon

HHH and Vince are at ringside. Joined in progress with Michaels sending Shane outside for an Asai moonsault and some right hands. Vince offers a distraction though and Shane scores with a Shawn forearm into the nip up (JR on Vince: “His boy Shane just won the pony.”). The top rope elbow connects and, after running around the ring, Shane tunes up the band.

The superkick is blocked though and Shawn punches him down. There’s the real forearm into the nip up (Shane’s was fake….somehow) and the elbow keeps Shane in trouble. Vince breaks up Sweet Chin Music so HHH chases him off. Cue the Spirit Squad to jump Shawn for the DQ.

Rating: C-. As is the case with most McMahon matches, keeping it short is a good idea. Shane mimicking Shawn was a good idea and the match could have been a lot worse under different circumstances. It’s good that Shane didn’t take the fall, but can DX ever break a real sweat in this feud?

Post match the Squad sends HHH into the steps and beats up Shawn. Shane loads up some chairs but HHH is back with the sledgehammer to clear the ring, because DX can’t look bad even when it’s six on one.

Overall Rating: D+. This show went by rather quickly but that doesn’t mean it went well. Cena vs. Umaga was interesting but the money match is against Edge. Then you have the DX vs. McMahons stuff and….yeah it’s starting to wear thin. There is a lot of juice left in the feud if they do it right, but that’s not what is going on. DX is running through the McMahons and/or their goons every week and that is taking away a lot of the interest in the feud. The rest of the show was your usual stuff, but they need to tweak that main event story in a hurry.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Saturday Night’s Main Event #33
Date: July 15, 2006
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 17,343
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for another special, which is really code for a commercial for the Great American Bash and ultimately Summerslam. These shows don’t mean much in the days of Raw and Smackdown, but there is something about that name that makes it feel special. It helps that the card is fairly stacked so hopefully it works out. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here are Hulk Hogan and his daughter Brooke (Lawler approves) to open things up. Brooke says it has always been her dream to be here with her dad. Hulk says thank goodness she looks like her mom and talks about being on the first ever Saturday Night’s Main Event. Cue Randy, with a rose, to interrupt. He says Hulk is the biggest legend anywhere and says Brooke is beautiful, even presenting her with the rose. Randy is a Hulkamaniac as well, so he would like to respectively challenge Hulk to a match at Summerslam. Hulk respectively accepts, but doesn’t seem to like how Randy is looking at Brooke. Short and to the point.

Video on Batista.

King Booker/Finlay/Mark Henry vs. Rey Mysterio/Bobby Lashley/Batista

Lashley sends Finlay into the corner to start and it’s a six man standoff as we take an early break. Back with Finlay slapping a chinlock on Rey before it’s quickly off to Booker. Various things start breaking down, allowing the Leprechaun to slip Finlay the shillelagh to deck Rey for two. Rey is fine enough to kick Henry down (oh dear) but the referee doesn’t see the hot tag to Batista. Booker comes in but Rey dives between their legs and NOW the hot tag brings in Batista. House is cleaned and it’s a 619 to Booker, setting up the Batista Bomb for the pin.

Rating: C-. And that’s going to be Henry’s last televised match for about ten months as Henry completely destroyed his knee (the patella was split completely in two) so forget about Batista’s big revenge. The injury shook things up a lot as you can only get so much out of the good guys being up 3-2, but they did what they could. They did what they could, and it could have been a lot worse.

Vince McMahon gives the Spirit Squad a pep talk but DX takes over the audio, turning it into Vince giving the team spanking instructions.

We see highlights of the first round of Diva Bull Riding from earlier today. Victoria and Michelle McCool made the finals.

Melina/Johnny Nitro vs. Carlito/Trish Stratus

The men start but Nitro tags Melina in, meaning Trish has to do the same (come in, not tag Melina). Nitro trips Trish down early on and Melina adds a thumb to the eye (JR: “You wouldn’t see Meredith Vieira doing something like that.”), setting up a double hair takedown. That bangs up Melina as well so it’s a double tag to the men as everything breaks down. The women fight to the floor and the Backstabber gives Carlito the fast pin. This was really rushed so it didn’t have the chance to go anywhere.

Earlier today, Kevin Von Erich got to make a quick appearance. Nothing wrong with the local legend.

Spirit Squad vs. D-Generation X

Non-title elimination tag and there is a cell on either side of the ring for eliminated members. Shawn says the following thrashing of five male cheerleaders is brought to you by DX, and if you’re not down with that, catchphrase. Shawn gets taken into the corner to start but he manages to grab the megaphone and clean some house. The Squad bails to the floor for a huddle, which HHH breaks up with an air horn. Back in and Shawn superkicks Mitch for the first elimination.

Back from a break with HHH getting rid of Johnny with a spinebuster. Shawn chases Kenny up to the stage, where Vince gets in a chair shot to put Shawn in trouble. They head back to the ring where Shawn suplexes his way out of a sleeper. It’s off to HHH to clean house, including another spinebuster. A double clothesline sets up the Pedigree to get rid of Nicky and it’s 2-2. The superkick gets rid of Mikey and it’s a top rope elbow, followed by Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree to complete the shutout.

Rating: D. You could say this about any match involving these two sides, but what were you expecting? It’s a pair of the best of all time against five goons. It’s almost a miracle that the Squad lasted this long and it isn’t hard to believe that Shawn and HHH could dispatch them this fast. There was no reason to believe this would be a competitive match and it wasn’t but it also wasn’t anything more than a DX workout session.

Post match Vince tries to unlock the cage but Shawn superkicks him inside with the rest of the Squad.

Video on Sabu.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari for a chat. Daivari talks about how awesome Khali is….and here are Big Show and Paul Heyman to interrupt. Show lists off his size and resume and says one day they’ll have to see who the real giant is. That’s for later though, as he wants to put Khali over tonight. He brings up the Punjabi Prison match but here’s Undertaker to interrupt. Undertaker goes after Khali and clotheslines him to the floor before going after Show. Khali gets back in and a double chokeslam leaves Undertaker laying.

Post break, Big Show says Undertaker can come face him on ECW if he has the guts.

Stevie Richards vs. Sabu

Extreme Rules. Sabu wastes no time in throwing a chair at Richards, setting up the Triple Jump Moonsault for two. Richards misses a charge in the corner and gets laid on a table, setting up the….flying something with a chair kind of in the same area to drive Richards through an already broken table for the pin. This was vintage WWECW: take away any story, feud, reason for these two for fighting and the character that made Richards work and have a match with weapons for the sake of having weapons, because that’s all ECW was about.

We get Brooke Hogan’s About Us music video.

Randy Orton is talking to Brooke Hogan in the parking lot but Hulk comes in to break that up. The Hogans go to leave but Orton runs back in with an RKO onto the trunk to leave Hulk laying.

Michelle McCool wins the Diva Bull Riding contest. Much like the Diva Search, it’s an excuse to have the Divas in various outfits doing various things that involve a lot of shaking.

Video on John Cena losing the Raw World Title to Rob Van Dam, who lost it to Edge, setting up tonight’s title match (which isn’t a triple threat for Van Dam’s title because Van Dam screwed up).

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

Edge is defending and has Lita with him. We get the Big Match Intros and Edge drops straight to the floor, only to have Cena cut him off in a hurry. Edge low bridges him to the floor though and we take an early break. Back with Edge hammering away in the corner and loading up a superplex, only to slip off the ropes and crash down hard. The referee makes sure they’re both alive and Edge gets two off a big boot. Cena pops up and initiates the finishing sequence but Lita pulls the referee out. The referee is down and Edge misses a spear, setting up the STFU. Lita slaps the referee to send him back inside to call the DQ.

Rating: D+. This was nothing with barely five minutes factoring out the commercial. The biggest problem was the time, which only gave them a chance for one memorable deal, which wound up being Edge nearly killing both of them (it was just a slip). They’re destined for the real match at Summerslam so for now, this worked out fine for the “we’re out of time but here’s what we promised” main event.

Cena celebrates but thankfully understands what the word DISQUALIFICATION means and immediately knows he didn’t win the title. That’s not cool with Cena, who hits a pretty good looking FU off the steps and through the announcers’ table.

Overall Rating: D. Completely skippable show here and you can see how unimportant this series has become. There is no need for some big special when you have the same thing done every Monday and Friday night. The wrestling wasn’t important, the Undertaker appearance was to set up a guest star spot on ECW and there was a bull riding contest for obvious reasons. Nothing to see here, and thankfully WWE/NBC seemed to understand that, as the next one wasn’t for almost a year.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: July 14, 2006
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are rapidly approaching the Great American Bash and now we have a main event. This time around it’s going to be King Booker challenging the weakest World Champion of modern times in Rey Mysterio. Other than that, Batista is back and that could shake things up a lot. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Batista returning and beating up Mark Henry last week.

Opening sequence.

Here are King Booker, Queen Sharmell and William Regal to get things going. Regal reads a proclamation from a scroll, saying that Booker is ready to take his rightful place. Dropping to a knee, Regal promises to destroy Mysterio tonight, all for the glory of Queen Sharmell. JBL: “She’s the queen goddess of HOT!” Booker promises to win the title and talks about Batista returning last week.

We see a clip of Batista destroying Henry, but at the same time, Booker jumped Mysterio in the back for the real beatdown. Booker promises to win the title but here’s Rey. Regal goes to the aisle so Rey can sneak in from the crowd to jump Booker. Perfectly fine opening segment to move forward on the title match.

Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy

Matt jumps him during the entrance and JBL is not pleased with the lack of the introduction. A belly to back suplex gives Matt two but Kennedy sends him shoulder first into the post. The arm is sent into the buckle for a bonus and Kennedy wraps it around the rope. We hit the armbar for a bit before Kennedy heads up top. That’s fine with Matt, who crotches him down and grabs a superplex.

The Side Effect gets two but the Twist of Fate is countered into a neckbreaker to give Kennedy two of his own. Kennedy tries his own Twist of Fate but Hardy reverses into the real thing, only to have Kennedy grab the rope. The cover takes a bit too long though and Hardy rolls him up for the fast pin.

Rating: C. It’s weird seeing Kennedy pinned and having Matt Hardy be the one to do it is all the more confusing. The match itself was average at best, putting it fairly high up on the Kennedy scale. Matt wasn’t great in the ring at this point but you could pencil him in for a pretty watchable match, which is what you got here.

Raw Rebound.

Michelle McCool and Kristal talk trash about Ashley, who pops up with Jillian Hall for the big catfight. JBL is rather pleased.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari on the stage for a chat. Daivari asks if Undertaker is scared of Khali since he didn’t even show up last week. If Undertaker is this phenom, show yourself. Then the gong sounds and Undertaker pops up in the ring, with Daivari insisting that Khali isn’t afraid. Undertaker shoots lightning at Daivari, who falls down while Khali doesn’t move. Daivari has to beg Khali to not go to the ring and eventually he backs up.

Paul London vs. Jamie Noble

Brian Kendrick and Kid Kash are at ringside as JBL talks about the Pit Bulls’ politics to start. Noble is aggressive early on and hammers away on the ropes. An elbow to the face puts Noble down but he grounds London and grabs a rear naked choke. London breaks it up with a ram into the corner and he starts to kick Noble down. A belly to belly sets up a dropkick to the back for two but Noble’s powerslam gets the same. Kash goes after Kendrick on the floor though and the chase lets Kash get in a cheap shot on London. The fireman’s carry gutbuster gives Noble the cheating pin.

Rating: C. These two are both very talented and it makes sense to put them in the ring together to draw some interest for the pay per view title match. Just don’t do the same thing with the partners swapped in and you’re onto something. We got the idea here so why waste time by doing the same thing again?

Miz is VERY excited about the Diva Search girls in their bikinis for Boot Camp.

Sylvan thinks the Diva Search girls are beautiful, but not as beautiful as Quebec. Come see it. JBL: “I’d rather go to Rwanda. I hate this guy.”

Here’s Teddy Long for the contract signing between Batista and Mark Henry. The match is taking place at the Great American Bash, but we’ll make it a little bigger: the winner gets the World Title shot at Summerslam. As for tonight though, if either of them touches the other, they forfeit the match.

Batista is out first and talks about how good it is to be back. Coming through that curtain is a natural high that he cannot explain and, while getting a little choked up, Batista talks about how much he loves being here. Last year was the best year of his life but then Mark Henry took it all away. The jacket comes off as Batista talks about sitting at home for six months while Henry dominated Smackdown. If Henry thinks last week was payback, he has no idea what is coming for him at the Great American Bash.

Now it’s Henry, with a bandage on his head, coming out to say that Batista must feel good about himself. That was the worst beating he ever received and all it took was the World Champion and Batista jumping him from behind. If it didn’t cost him the Summerslam match, Henry would detach Batista’s head right now. Teddy calms things down and they both sign. The table is turned over but Henry leaves without getting physical.

United States Title: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending and drives Finlay into the corner to start. That earns him a shot to the face and we hit the chinlock early on. That’s fine with Lashley, who is right back with a delayed vertical suplex as we take a break. Back with Finlay dropping him with a clothesline for two and sending Lashley shoulder first into the post. A drop toehold sets up the Crossface but Lashley fights up again.

Clotheslines and a belly to belly have Finlay bailing to the floor, where he throws a chair inside. With that not working, Finlay grabs the Shillelagh but Lashley hits a backdrop and tosses it up to the stage. They fight to the floor where Finlay misses a chair shot so the referee has to take them away. Cue the Leprechaun to throw Finlay another Shillelagh so he can knock Lashley cold for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. They had a pretty nice physical match here and there’s nothing wrong with putting the title on Finlay. Lashley already got a nice rub out of it and Finlay is tied into the show’s top heel. It wasn’t even a clean loss so Lashley gets to save fast. Good enough power brawl here and the title change is a fine switch.

Earlier today, Vito went shopping at the Mall of America.

Here’s Miz to introduce the Diva Search girls for Divas Boot Camp, as hosted by Sgt. Slaughter. It’s an obstacle course and the winner gets immunity.

Jen goes first and finishes in 42 seconds.

Layla, finishing with the splits gets 37 seconds.

Erica at 48 seconds.

Maryse at 41 seconds.

Milena, who loses her hat, at 49 seconds.

Rebecca, whose hair gets caught in the jump rope, at 49 seconds.

JT, who drops the jump rope, at 43 seconds.

Amy at 46 seconds.

Layla wins immunity, and more importantly, Sgt. Slaughter’s hat. I got that at a house show when I was a kid so I have to smile. This was exactly as advertised: good looking women in swimsuits running and jumping a lot. Throw in Move Along by All American Rejects as the song throughout and I’d call it a success.

Great American Bash rundown.

William Regal vs. Rey Mysterio

Non-title with King Booker and Sharmell on commentary. Joined in progress with Regal holding a chinlock as the EDDIE chants don’t work as well here. Regal elbows him in the face for three straight twos. Rey is back up with a headscissors out of the corner and a basement dropkick for two of his own. Sharmell offers a quick distraction though, allowing Regal to crotch Rey on top. Regal drops a knee and puts on a chinlock as those chants start up again.

Cole gets so annoyed at Booker that he stands up for a bit as Rey is sent to the apron. You don’t do that to Rey, who is right back with a springboard seated senton. Booker gets up for a distraction this time, allowing Rey to hit a baseball slide low blow in the corner. The split legged moonsault gets two and Rey knocks Booker off the apron. The 619 into the top rope splash finishes Regal.

Rating: C. Another run of the mill match but it’s nice to see Mysterio getting a win, even if it’s over someone not quite in the main event. This is why a villain has lackeys though, as Rey beating one of Regal’s associates is a fine way to set him up for the pay per view title match. The match was all about Rey overcoming the odds and it worked out well enough, with Rey FINALLY not looking like a loser.

Rey hits a 619 on Booker to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was completely acceptable throughout and it’s hard to complain about the Diva Search stuff, as you can see exactly what they are going for with the whole thing. At the same time, if that cuts down on the stupid stuff like Vito having fun out there, it’s not the worst replacement imaginable. The Bash isn’t looking like the best show ever, but there are enough things on the show that I want to see, so at least it’s feeling better than Vengeance.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: July 11, 2006
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re officially into a new era around here as Rob Van Dam has lost the ECW World Title to Big Show thanks to a screwy finish/the need to get the title off of him due to his arrest. Big Show already has his first challenger lined up too, as Ric Flair is this week’s guest star. This could go in a lot of ways so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Big Show winning the title last week when Paul Heyman turned on Rob Van Dam.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Heyman for an opening chat. Last week he made sure Van Dam lost the title and it’s all the fans’ fault. The people here are the reason he is no longer the champion and the reason why Van Dam has been suspended for thirty days. Heyman tried to convince Van Dam to calm down a bit and not defend the title so much, but the RVD chants drove him even further.

That drove Heyman to end it all and now he is a martyr. He sacrificed his friendship with Van Dam for these people and he will be your messiah. Heyman will lead his children to the promised land and you’re all coming with him. This felt rather forced, probably because that’s exactly what it was.

Post break, Tommy Dreamer runs into Heyman, now with armed riot guards. Heyman has no time to explain, because Dreamer’s match is next, despite the fact that he is in street clothes.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Test

Dreamer slugs away to start and it’s a Cactus Clothesline to take them to the floor. Back in and Test hits a running clothesline in the corner as the cockiness starts early. Dreamer gets the knee up in the corner though and grabs a neckbreaker. The DDT is countered into a full nelson slam but Test misses the top rope elbow. Dreamer manages to get him up in the Death Valley Driver but Test slips down and grabs a rollup (plus the rope) for the pin.

Rating: D+. I got what they were going for here but having Test win via rollup wasn’t exactly making Dreamer look like he was in serious trouble. Granted it’s Test so he isn’t the best choice to go with something even slightly complicated, but how hard is it to have Dreamer get in a little offense and then get squashed? Fine idea and poor execution, which could apply to a lot of things around here.

Candice Michelle gets dressed when Kelly comes in. Candice promises to take the dancing to the extreme and gets very close to Kelly’s face.

Ariel the Tarot Card Reader says the future holds blood and spits blood at the camera.

Kelly and Candice Michelle have their expose and of course here’s Mike Knox with the towel. This time Sandman pops up to cane Knox off the stage.

CM Punk says his tattoos tell a story, like DRUG FREE and HONOR. He’s fighting against the system.

Sabu vs. Justin Credible

This is under normal rules for reasons of general stupidity. Sabu takes him down to start so Justin heads outside to grab a table. That earns him a big running flip dive so Sabu sets up the (partially broken) table at ringside. Credible comes outside and is promptly put on the table for the Arabian Facebuster and the DQ. Well that was pointless.

Balls Mahoney says he’s always ready to fight.

Ric Flair says he’s coming for his 17^th World Title tonight but he also needs to talk about Mick Foley. If Foley wants to be a man, he can face Flair in a match of Foley’s choice. As for Show, Flair is coming for the title and will take advantage of any mistake Show makes.

Shannon Moore, now with spiked hair, tattoos and piercings, is coming.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Ric Flair

Show is defending and this is under Extreme Rules. They circle each other a bit until Show sends him into the corner with the straight power. Flair bails to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Flair being gorilla pressed and headbutted as the dominance is on early. Flair is already busted open and another headbutt makes it even worse. Show tosses him outside so it’s time to bring in the weapons but Show sends Flair back inside before they can be used.

A suplex drops Flair, who tells Show to bring it on anyway. That means another headbutt into a powerslam but Flair scores with some low blows. Some low kicks have Show down again and now it’s time for the weapons. Flair doesn’t waste time in going with the barbed wire baseball bat to gouge Show’s head open. Some trashcan and chair shots put Show down….for two, as he launches Flair off on the kickout. Now it’s thumbtacks time and some chair shots to the head knock Show into said tacks. That just angers Show, who hits a chokeslam and the cobra clutch backbreaker retains.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what to make of this one as people remember it as Flair being this big pin cushion, but that’s really just a quick burst. The match runs about thirteen and a half minutes and the violence doesn’t come into play until about eight or nine minutes in. Yeah Flair bleeds like a pig at the start but he does that when he goes to the grocery store. The barbed wire bat and tacks are a bit much, but they’re really not that big of a part of the match.

That being said, the match isn’t all that good as it’s Show squashing him, Flair getting in a few weapons shots, and then Show finishing him off. Bad match, but not as bad as people remember, especially when it ties into Flair wanting to go extreme with Foley, and perhaps finding out that he’s in over his head.

Post match Show throws him into the tacks. Flair is helped out and we get a THANK YOU FLAIR chant to end the show. This part, with Flair barely able to walk and being rather bloody is probably the reason this match is somewhat infamous, as he looks pretty bad.

Overall Rating: D+. This series is reaching the point of dead on arrival, as any spark that it had is long gone, with “Ric Flair Goes EXTREME” not being much of a calling card. The first problem is the main event stuff, which would be the upper midcard on Raw at its very best. That doesn’t exactly make me want to stick around, but it’s certainly better than EVERYTHING else, which feels as worthless as you can get. Test beating Tommy Dreamer, a vampire, and Sabu in a regular match. If that’s as good as they have here, they have more troubles than they can solve.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 10, 2006
Location: Tyson Events Center, Sioux City, Iowa
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Everything got shook up last week as Edge beat Rob Van Dam to win the Raw World Title. Other than that, it’s time to head towards Dallas for Saturday Night’s Main Event, which was scheduled to feature last week’s main event. Odds are something is going to change for that show, which is likely only going one way. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at last week’s title change.

John Cena vs. Shelton Benjamin

Edge and Lita are sitting at their own commentary table, as Edge is defending against Cena on Saturday in your new main event. Cena whips him into the corner to start but Shelton is back with a suplex. A snap suplex sets up a chinlock as Lawler is begging Edge and Lita for a live celebration. Back up and Cena misses a crossbody, meaning it’s right back to the chinlock.

That’s broken up with an electric chair so Cena goes up, only to have Edge offer a distraction. Shelton hits a great looking springboard enziguri to put Cena on the floor and we take a break. Back with Shelton holding another chinlock as Edge gets in his version of Dusty Rhodes’ “wined and dined with kings and queens” line as Cena makes the comeback. The FU is countered though and Shelton grabs a Samoan drop for two. The Stinger Splash misses though and it’s the STFU for the tap.

Rating: C. The chinlocks took some of the life out of this but Cena was looking good while it lasted. Shelton is a solid choice for an opponent here as he can have just enough credibility to give Cena a sweat but he’s still not going to be actually score the upset. Good opener here, with Edge and Lita rolling on commentary.

Post match Cena charges at Edge and the fight is on. Lita grabs Cena’s leg so Edge can hammer away and the Impaler into the spear leaves Cena laying. Edge and Lita say they’re heading to the hotel.

We look back at DX’s barbecue last week and the two of them torturing Vince McMahon.

Eugene mocks Vince and Shane McMahon over last week and shouts catchphrases at them. Vince thinks there should be a handicap match tonight, and guess who is facing the McMahons. Eugene: “Dr. Isaac Yankem?” Shane isn’t happy with Eugene’s lack of getting it.

Melina vs. Trish Stratus

Johnny Nitro is here with Melina. Trish chases her to the apron to start and it’s time to scream a lot. Melina bails underneath the ring and a Nitro distraction lets Melina get in a kick to the back of the head. We hit the chinlock for a bit with Trish fighting out of it, setting up the Stratusphere out of the corner. The spinning headscissors into a spinebuster gives Trish two and Melina is in trouble. Nitro offers a distraction though and Melina’s rollup with tights gets the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a match here and there is nothing wrong with that on the way to making Melina something. Trish vs. Melina isn’t exactly a major feud but the women’s division has been dying for fresh blood for a very, very long time now. Melina might not be the future, but they have to bring in someone else so points for doing anything.

Post match Carlito runs in to go after Nitro to build towards Saturday’s mixed tag.

Edge and Lita go to a hotel but their room isn’t ready yet. Time to hit the bar, albeit after Edge yells at the desk clerk.

Highlanders vs. Rob Conway/Matt Striker

Striker’s music interrupts the Highlanders’ pre-match chat so Striker can go nowhere with Rory. Conway comes in and gets beaten up in the corner, setting up the Battering Ram for two. Robbie scares Striker off the apron and there’s a double shoulder to drop Conway again. The Scot Drop is good for the fast pin.

Ric Flair is ready to tell the world the truth about Mick Foley.

Here’s Ric Flair to tell the world the truth about Mick Foley. Flair talks about Foley challenging him to a classic wrestling match at Vengeance and Flair beat him two straight falls. That was all the proof you need that Foley is a glorified stuntman….and here’s Foley on the screen to interrupt. Foley talks about how Flair talked out of the side of his a**, got rather drunk, hired a ghostwriter and slapped his name on a book to call himself an author. On the other hand, Foley wrote everything out on 760 pages of notebook paper and became a New York Times bestseller.

Foley wants to take us back to Munich, Germany in 1994 when Flair was Foley’s boss. That night, Foley got his head caught in the ropes, threw a punch, and dropped his ear. Someone took the ear back to Flair, who put it on ice and saw Foley finishing the match. Foley is the guy who ate peanut butter and jelly, drove 1000 miles round trip and slept in his car while learning to wrestle while Flair grabs men’s genitalia today and calls it wrestling. Foley: “Heading into Vengeance, I hadn’t been in fear of another man since I was an altar boy.”

Flair has talked about all these people who had beaten him up and all the pain and agony. They were going to go all night and all day and CAN YOU PLEASE GET A NEW CLICHE??? After Vengeance, that spot that Flair had in Foley’s mind was gone. Flair is a 16 time World Champion but Foley has his own titles. He’s the Hardcore Legend, a 3 time WWE Champion, a two time bestselling author, he’s been interviewed twice by Katie Couric and he’s a personal friend of Melina.

Whether Flair likes it or not, he gets no rematch because he’s out of Foley’s life. Flair: “Foley, will you quit crying about the past???” I’ll pause for the ironic laughter. Flair wants Foley right now in a hardcore match….and here’s Paul Heyman for one of the most bizarre standoffs I’ve ever seen. Flair has talked about how much garbage there is in ECW, but Heyman prefers to call it Extreme Entertainment.

Maybe Flair has not heard about it, but there is a new ECW World Champion and Heyman shows us some footage of the title change. Cue Big Show to say Flair is great but there is one thing he has never done: won the WWE, WCW and ECW World Titles. Maybe Flair can come do that too so the challenge is on for tomorrow night. Flair accepts and the title match is set, only to have a Heyman distraction set up the cobra clutch backbreaker to leave Flair laying.

There was a LOT to cover here. The Foley promo was the kind of thing you would expect from him when it’s time to get serious and the fire was there in his eyes. That kind of a story is hard to overcome and Foley was incredible as usual. Then there’s the Big Show challenging Flair and…..yeah it’s not helping ECW. It continues the trend of ECW needing guest stars and while it’s true, it doesn’t bode well for the show’s future. The biggest problem is it isn’t clear what ECW itself is, other than a place for Raw wrestlers to show up if there is nothing for them to do on Monday.

Vince and Shane are warming up with a baseball bat when Eugene comes in. Eugene can’t talk his way out of the match but they hand him a DX shirt….and then cover him with slime. Shane sends him into the wall and then shoves Eugene’s head into the toilet. Eugene is thrown out and Vince tosses the shirt with him.

During the break, Paul Heyman offered Candice Michelle a dance off against Kelly tomorrow, but she instead offers to dance with Kelly.

Viscera vs. Charlie Haas

Haas gets knocked into the corner to start and there’s the big chop to keeps him in trouble. Viscera stops to shout at Lilian Garcia and gets his throat snapped across the top rope. A kick to the back rocks Viscera but he charges into a swinging Boss Man Slam. The hip thrusting running splash misses….and Lilian tells them to start. She gets in the ring and says she just wants to be friends with both of them, but Haas pokes him in the eyes. The blind Viscera hits a Samoan drop on Lilian (because he’s now blind and dumb) and the match is stopped for medical treatment. Not enough to rate, but this was bad.

Post match, Viscera and Haas leave together because it seems to be a plan. Ok so maybe he isn’t so dumb.

Edge and Lita are a little intoxicated at the bar via a lot of mimosas.

Here’s the Miz to bring out the Diva Search finalists, though he stumbles through some material and has to read a number off of his wrist. We bring out the women and Miz says that’s why he got nervous. They all get twenty seconds to introduce themselves, with the first offering to be our sex kitten. Miz seems to approve of Maryse, who says she wants to be the next Fabulous Moolah, though the fans don’t seem to care.

Rebecca pulls something out of her boot and throws it all onto the rest of them. Most of them basically say they’re good looking, suck up to the crowd and say vote for them, showing the range of this group. Miz has a curve ball: this Friday will be the first challenge with Diva Boot Camp. He gets to say the information again and gets a lot close this time.

Jim Duggan yells at Shane McMahon for picking on Eugene and offers to beat some respect into him. Vince comes in to hit Duggan with a chair and the McMahons both give us a HOO.

Here’s Randy Orton to talk about how Hulk Hogan will be at Saturday Night’s Main Event. Hogan is a legend, and on Saturday he gets to meet the Legend Killer.

Randy Orton vs. Val Venis

RKO in 20 seconds.

Post match, Orton says he’s looking forward to meeting Hogan’s daughter Brooke too.

Edge and Lita are in their room when room service arrives. They need champagne and they want it in three minutes.

Smackdown rebound.

Saturday Night’s Main Event rundown.

Champagne arrives….but it’s disguised as John Cena, who beats the heck out of Edge. Cena sends him face first into the food (Cena: “The steak is actually pretty good.”) and lays him out with the title belt. Cena rings the dinner bell and leaves.

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. Eugene

The McMahons still have the slime on them and let’s make this No DQ for a bonus. Vince handles Eugene’s entrance, saying he is lean, mean, green and Eugene, who is still covered in slime. Cue the Spirit Squad to make it worse and Shane gets in a cheap shot as Vince heads to the apron with a mic for some live commentary. Shane punches Eugene down as Vince starts yelling about how no one is laughing now.

Eugene Hulks Up and hits the big boot, which draws in the Spirit Squad for the big beatdown. Shane loads up the big elbow through the announcers’ table but here’s DX to cut it off. Vince is glad to see them and wants the two of them to come to the middle of the ramp. Vince keeps looking above them and says NOW but nothing happens….so Eugene rolls Vince up for the pin.

Rating: D. Again, this was more about the angle than the wrestling itself and that’s perfectly fine. DX getting to mess with the McMahons again works, but it would be nice to have DX actually break a sweat for once. The main idea is fine, but at some point you need to make the heroes feel threatened. So far they have just been toying with the McMahons and the Spirit Squad and I don’t see that changing on Saturday.

DX is in hysterics on the stage and gives us the catchphrase to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was basically a big commercial for various things, ranging from the Diva Search to ECW to Saturday Night’s Main Event to the long term future with Summerslam (whenever they bring it up). That works out well, but the stuff in between is pretty horrible, with Viscera and Haas now seemingly becoming a team. Not a bad show, but it would be nice to not have so many things going on at once.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: July 7, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,993
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are coming up on the Great American Bash and that means we need to actually start building up the show. Last week’s show featured what felt like the end of Bobby Lashley vs. King Booker, which should free Booker up to challenge Rey Mysterio for the World Title. It’s not like there is anyone else in the main event scene at the moment. Oh and Batista is back after six months off. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video is all about Mark Henry injuring Batista, who is finally back tonight for revenge. Or maybe the Eggs Benedict.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Finlay, Simon Dean, William Regal, King Booker, Brian Kendrick, Paul London, Mr. Kennedy, Psicosis, Matt Hardy, Jamie Noble, Kid Kash, Scotty 2 Hotty, Funaki, Super Crazy

The winner gets a shot at Rey Mysterio at the Great American Bash. Booker and Regal come out last so JBL is on his feet with the hat over his heart. It’s a big brawl to start with everyone going to the brawling, including a rather heated fight between Crazy and Psicosis. JBL: “It looks like a border war. That’s why we need to build a wall.” Finlay dumps Crazy (JBL: “There went my hot dog vendor.”) with Psicosis following and the brawl starting again. Kash is tossed as we take a break.

Back with Kennedy breaking up the Worm with a clothesline. Noble, Dean, Funaki and Scotty are tossed out in a hurry with London and Kendrick going after Kennedy. Hardy gets in on it as well and Kennedy is out. We’re down to London, Kendrick, Finlay, Regal, Hardy and Booker so everyone pairs off.

London saves himself from Booker’s elimination attempt but Finlay gets rid of both London and Kendrick. Regal hits the Twist of Fate to Regal and dumps Finlay but Booker kicks him down. We’re down to Hardy, Regal and Booker so Hardy clotheslines both of them, only to have the double teaming put Hardy in trouble. Regal goes to eliminate Matt but Booker dumps both of them for the title shot.

Rating: D+. They got the winner right and that’s what matters the most here, but the rest of the match was pretty lame. You can only get so far with something like this, though Crazy and Psicosis deserve some praise for making the most out of their shot. They aren’t going to get many angles or even television time of their own so good for them for putting in that much effort.

Post match, Regal says ALL HAIL KING BOOKER and doesn’t even seem that annoyed.

Rey Mysterio doesn’t like what Mark Henry did to himself and Chavo Guerrero last week. He and Henry have unfinished business, but not he has to face King Booker at the Great American Bash. Every day he gets to bring home this title home is a great day, so at the Great American Bash, Booker is just one more away from a 619.

Here’s Sylvan, sending JBL into a rant about how much he can’t stand France. Sylvan invites us all to come to Quebec and maybe we can spend the summer there. JBL: “I’d rather spend it in h***.” Sylvan speaks some French and we see some shots of Montreal. JBL: “I’d rather have a root canal. This guy sucks.”

Miz pops up in the crowd and asks for a cheese steak before hyping up the rest of the show. He also confirms Batista vs. Mark Henry for the pay per view.

We look at some of Mark Henry’s path of rage, including injuring Chris Benoit.

We also look at some of Batista’s greatest triumphs, including beating JBL.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Super Crazy

Kennedy handles his own intro as usual but Crazy’s music cuts him off. That’s really not cool with Kennedy, who takes Crazy down as JBL calls Crazy a hot dog vendor again. After a trip to the floor with Crazy being sent into various things, Crazy is back in with some right hands. Kennedy drops him again though and hits a chinlock as JBL loses it over being named Jerk Of The Month in Smackdown Magazine.

The neck crank goes on and Kennedy gets annoyed at Crazy for daring to try a small package. Kennedy sends him face first into the mat and goes back to the neck cranking. The comeback is on again with some shots to the face and Crazy hits a slingshot dive. The Russian legsweep looks to set up the moonsault but here’s Psicosis for a distraction. Kennedy hits a Kenton Bomb for the pin.

Rating: C-. The amount of neck cranking makes me think this was a little longer than it needed to be but JBL’s rants were the best part. That tends to be the case, but at some point he is going to start taking away too much focus. The good thing is there isn’t much to be seen out of a Super Crazy vs. Mr. Kennedy match, as it isn’t like Kennedy can do much of note in the ring in the first place..

Kristal is yelling about Ashley but has to stop to interview Tatanka. He isn’t worried about facing Great Khali because he is facing his fears like a warrior. Tatanka looks to be about 71 years old here.

Video on the Caribbean tour.

Great Khali vs. Tatanka

The destruction ensues (with JBL making Indian vs. Indian jokes) so Daivari opens the casket, which is filled with white smoke. The screen goes wonky (of course) and Undertaker’s voice accepts the challenge.

Divas Search finalists video. Maryse being as fluent in English as she is after only speaking English for six months is very impressive.

Vito vs. Psicosis

We get a quick clip of Vito shopping for a purse in the Caribbean. Vito dances around to start and JBL (again) goes into a rant about Vito, including gay jokes about Cole. Psicosis tries to take him down to start so Vito strikes a pose, complete with the blurred out image. A suplex keeps the blurring up but Vito fights out of the corner as Cole explains that this is not about sexual orientation.

Hold on though as Vito stops for the Macarena (JBL: “THE MAN NEEDS A CHROMOSOME CHECK!” Psicosis is back with a reverse chinlock and another suplex but here’s Crazy for a distraction, setting up the dress over the head armbar to give Vito the win. JBL loses it again as only he can.

Rating: D. Again, ignoring all of the shenanigans, the match wasn’t very good in the first place. They were having a boring match which was only there for the sake of having Crazy come in at the end and that doesn’t make for the most thrilling use of five minutes. It also doesn’t help that Vito’s “he’s just having fun” deal is getting old in a hurry, but you had to know that was coming.

Booker promises to become World Champion and Regal toasts him with champagne.

Batista won the World Title at Wrestlemania.

Mark Henry injured Kurt Angle.

Pitbulls vs. Funaki/Scotty 2 Hotty

Noble jumps Funaki to start and a double clothesline gives Kash two. It’s back to Noble for some shots to the neck and choking on the apron. Kash plants Funaki for two and hammers away again as the aggression is working so far. Funaki avoids a charge though and the hot tag brings in Scotty to clean house. Everything breaks down and Noble hits a fireman’s carry gutbuster to drop Funaki. A spear/Russian legsweep combination gives Kash the pin.

Rating: C. The Pitbulls are a good example of a team of two guys who had nothing else going on and just needed a fresh repackaging. They aren’t doing anything that reinvents the wheel but you have two people who can work and get a new gimmick. Maybe it works and maybe it doesn’t, but at least they’re getting a chance and are making the most of it. That is something that could be used again and it could do a lot of good.

ECW Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown, with Bobby Lashley defending the US Title against Finlay and William Regal being announced.

Finlay and Regal agree that the title match is every man for himself but Finlay has to chase the Leprechaun away from Regal’s leg.

Gregory Helms vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title. During his entrance, Helms says Lashley is a Superman but Helms is the Kryptonite. Joined in progress after a break as commentary talks about how long Helms has held the Cruiserweight Title. Lashley hits a rather delayed vertical suplex for two, which JBL says he hasn’t seen since Rick Rude. Ok then. Helms gets in a few shots of his own and grabs a chinlock but Lashley powers up to his feet without much effort. Back up and Lashley charges into a boot in the corner but comes back with a powerslam for the pin. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: C-. Another match that didn’t have the time to build into anything and doesn’t exactly do much for Helms. No he shouldn’t be beating the US Champion, but maybe they shouldn’t be having Helms in this spot if he’s going to be beaten so decisively. Lashley winning is fine, but don’t have him beat another champion like that.

Mark Henry promises to make Batista’s comeback the shortest in history.

Miz is still very fired up about what we have been seeing, and introduces the returning Batista.

Here is Batista for his big return, with commentary staying silent so the moment can sink in. Batista doesn’t waste time in calling out Henry, threatening to come get him if Henry doesn’t come out. Cue Henry for the staredown in the aisle but he turns to go back, only to have Rey Mysterio jump him. Batista comes out and gets to Henry, who is sent hard into the steps. The steps go off of Henry’s head as JBL sounds scared of what we’re seeing. Referees come down but Batista is too busy beating on Henry with a chair to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This one really didn’t work out for the most part as the entire thing was built around Batista returning and King Booker becoming the new #1 contender. The good thing is that they have more of a direction now, but you should be able to see where things are going for the next few months. At the same time though, the wrestling was pretty worthless tonight, as we need to drag the worthless Mysterio Era to the end of its run and that could make the next few weeks a bit rough. That was the case here, and it wasn’t very good.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 3, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,993
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Then Rob Van Dam and Sabu got pulled over and the police found a bunch of drugs, meaning they had to be punished. This is quite the problem when you’re the WWE Champion and have a title defense coming up in a few weeks. Tonight will probably deal with the fallout so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s DX’s parody and their most recent humiliation of the McMahons.

DX arrives in the parking lot and is greeted by Jonathan Coachman and a bunch of security guards. Vince McMahon has barred them from appearing on the show tonight and Shawn Michaels wants to know what they’re supposed to do tonight. HHH has an idea and the team walks away. I have a bad feeling about this.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and Lita for an opening chat. Edge promises that he is going to own the summer and tomorrow night, he is getting his shot against Rob Van Dam. Then it’s on to Saturday Night’s Main Event where he will defend against Van Dam and John Cena. Those two are like the Philadelphia Phillies and the Philadelphia Eagles, with various insults ensuing. For tonight though, Lita is going to show Torrie Wilson what a cover girl is supposed to look like and Edge is in a triple threat tag team match.

Edge is about to announce his partner but here’s Cena to beat him up. Cue Van Dam, who has heard about how close he was to tapping out. He’s a fighting champion, so Cena can have a title shot tonight. Edge says that’s not fair because he would lose his title shot tomorrow night if Cena wins. That’s cool with Van Dam, so let’s do Saturday Night’s Main Event tonight with a triple threat title match. Edge promises that the next WWE Champion will be Rated R, but Van Dam says the next champion will be Rated RVD. Maybe he does need the suspension to clear his head a bit.

Vince McMahon arrives in the back with Coach greeting him. DX is indeed gone, much to Vince’s approval. The two of them walk inside….and DX drives up in a convertible with women in the back. Where did they get the car?

Batista is back this Friday.

Lita vs. Torrie Wilson

Lita suplexes her down for two to start and gets the same off a Russian legsweep. A knee to the back lets Lita mock her a bit so Torrie slaps her in the face. The comeback is on with some clotheslines but the referee takes the Stink Face by mistake. Lita DDTs her to end the annoyance.

Vince yells at Coach about making sure DX is gone. It feels like a ghost town around here and Vince wants to know what is going on.

Spirit Squad vs. Eugene/Jim Duggan/Viscera/Val Venis/Gene Snitsky

What a horrible assortment of losers, but at least they have the matching cheerleader uniforms. Nicky and Venis start things off and some cheap shots from the apron have Val in early trouble. A suplex allows Venis to make the tag off to Eugene but Johnny comes in off the blind tag to kick him down.

It’s off to Kenny for a jumping back elbow and Mitch comes in for the cover. The rotating beatdown ensues until Kenny misses a splash in the corner. The hot tag brings in Snitsky to clean house as everything breaks down. Duggan gets a rather strong reaction but is sent outside in a hurry. A top rope legdrop/Swanton combination finishes Snitsky.

Rating: D. There’s only so much you can get out of this but it’s the kind of thing that the Squad needed after so many bad losses. The menagerie of numskulls getting to lose to the Squad doesn’t have anything else going on so this wasn’t quite the devastating defeat. It’s going to give the Squad a bit of a push to their next loss to DX though so this is as good as it’s going to get for them at the moment.

We go back to the parking lot where DX is having a 4^th of July bash with Shawn working the grill and the women nearby. We get various hot dog jokes about McMahon and DX, but HHH sees Mr. Fuji over there. Shawn: “I LOVE MR. FUJI!” Shawn goes over to see him so HHH has some women come up and flash a WWE bus driver (with the camera not doing the best job of covering things up as the girls walk off). Shawn comes back and is disappointed by the lack of Mr. Fuji. As for the Spirit Squad, they can come out here and take their beating whenever they like.

Highlanders vs. Rob Conway/Matt Striker

Rory headbutts Striker down to start and hammers away in the corner, complete with putting his kilt over Striker’s face. Robbie come in for a Junkyard Dog style headbutt to Conway, who has to suplex his way to freedom. Striker is good without coming back in though, leaving Conway to take the Scot Drop (double fireman’s carry into a faceplant) for the pin. Short and inoffensive as a way to get the team’s feet wet.

Candice Michelle comes up to HHH as Shawn is off in the TV production truck. HHH seems to have some issues standing and then Candice has the same problem. Various issues ensue, complete with Candice shouting YES over and over. They both seem rather relieved and two women pop up from underneath the table. That’s rather risque for this era.

Post break, Shawn tells HHH to come into the control truck, with Candice and the other two girls going with them. There are cameras all over the arena and after having the women get to know one of the production guys over there, Shawn sits down and starts pushing buttons. The feed goes out but they’re still on the air.

Vince goes to the restroom and of course there is a camera in there, which of course WWE has access to. Vince gives commentary (Andre the Giant is mentioned) but Coach comes in to say that Vince is on camera (with Coach’s leg being moistened), freaking the boss out.

Post break here is Vince in the ring to talk about how humiliating last week is. DX is out there in the parking lot with their barbecue but now they are humiliating him and that’s too much. The mic cuts out and we get some noises, as Vince isn’t happy again.

Vince’s voice is suddenly very high pitched before going to the other direction, with Vince saying he sounds like Darth Vader. Then we get a picture of a rooster drawn on screen, with a word balloon saying “I LOVE COCKS”. HHH’s voice comes over the loud speaker and he says DX can humiliate him even further….so we see last week’s human waste drop again. Vince tells Coach to go deal with this so we see Shawn knocking Coach down with the door of the production truck.

The livid Vince makes DX vs. the Spirit Squad in an elimination tag. That sounds like a very bad idea and the laughter sound effects seem to agree. Then we get crickets instead of Vince’s music, which starts up a few seconds later….and is soon replaced by Stand Back. As funny as this kind of thing is going to get and was a long way around to set up a match that sounds like it should be a Raw main event.

Intercontinental Title: Johnny Nitro vs. Carlito

Nitro is defending and we get some extensive replays of Melina’s entrance. Carlito is taken into the corner to start and Nitro claims a poke to the eye before getting in a cheap shot. The dancing legdrop sets up the chinlock as Lawler talks about Melina’s maracas. Carlito fights up without much trouble with a clothesline and the springboard back elbow. The Backstabber connects but Melina comes in for the DQ.

Post match here’s Trish to start the catfight with Carlito standing back and watching. More replays, this time of Trish running to the ring and the brawl, ensue.

Paul Heyman isn’t sure about Rob Van Dam doing this but Van Dam believes in himself and ECW. Van Dam leaves and Heyman gives him that Brock Lesnar/Big Show Survivor Series 2002 look.

We meet the Diva Search finalists, including Maryse, Layla, Milena (Rosa Mendes) and various others.

Vince doesn’t care about Coach being banged up because he’s leaving and wants Coach to get the limo ready.

Umaga vs. Scott Wright

DX interrupts Armando Alejandro Estrada’s promo with a merchandise plug. Umaga would be a better enforcer for Vince than the Spirit Squad. The Samoan Spike finishes Wright in a little over a minute.

Post match, DX interrupts Estrada’s promo again, this time with various sound effects.

Vince gets in the limo….and a bunch of fireworks go off from it, complete with green smoke. After the driver pulls Vince, covered in smoke and green paint, DX pops up with American flags and sparklers. Happy Fourth of July.

This Week In Wrestling: the NWO debuts.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. He was inspired by the NWO video, but not as excited as he was by Brooke Hogan’s music video last week. That would be Hulk Hogan’s 18 year old daughter mind you. Hulk is going to pick Brooke’s date on an upcoming episode of Hogan Knows Best, and if Orton gets to be the pick, he’ll show Brooke why he’s a legend. Oh dear.

Edge says he’s going to win a title, unlike Philadelphia.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and Edge gets double teamed in the corner to start. Rob and Cena start taking turns, with Van Dam hitting a running spinwheel kick in the corner. Edge gets tossed outside and we take an early break. Back with Edge breaking up Van Dam’s superplex attempt on Cena, who crashes out to the floor. The cartwheel moonsault gives Van Dam two on Edge but Cena pulls Edge outside for a whip into the steps. Rob is right there with a dive onto Cena but Edge is back in to break up the FU on Van Dam.

Cena loads up Edge in a suplex until Van Dam takes both of them down. A double clothesline puts all three down and it’s a three way slugout from their knees. Rob is sent outside and Cena initiates the finishing sequence on Edge. The FU puts Edge on the floor so Lita brings in a chair, earning herself an FU of her own. Van Dam is back in with the Van Daminator to Cena but the Five Star misses. There’s the FU to Van Dam but Edge is in with a belt shot to Cena for the pin on Van Dam and the title.

Rating: B. They kept things moving here and the match was better than I would have bet on as a result. Above all else they weren’t out there too long with the match only running about eleven minutes. Edge winning is quite the big moment and it’s the first time the title has changed hands on Raw since 2001. Good match here, as Van Dam’s main event push loses a leg in a single night.

Cut to a STUNNED Cena fan for a great visual as Edge celebrates (with Lita still down) to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Aside from the main event, which I liked quite a bit, this was a one note show with the entire night being about DX vs. Vince. That doesn’t exactly make for the best night, though there were at least some funny jokes. It isn’t a good feud because DX feels like they’re toying with Vince and the Spirit Squad, but it hasn’t gone on long enough to completely overstay its welcome. This week used up a lot of that mileage though, as this was a pretty rough show.

As for the title change, I’m not sure how much longer Van Dam was going to be champion anyway, as his title reign seemed to be little more than a way to warm up the debuting ECW. I can’t imagine him making it all the way to Summerslam as champion so there is a good chance that the title change would have gone the same way at Saturday Night’s Main Event. Either way, Van Dam looks like a moron for screwing up the biggest push of his career and it’s pretty hard to feel sorry for him.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: June 30, 2006
Location: Roanoke Civic Center, Roanoke, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re done with Vengeance and that means we can officially start getting ready for the Great American Bash. I’m not sure what we should be expecting there, but somehow we have another King Booker vs. Bobby Lashley match, this time inside of a cage. They really like that match and I can kind of get why, but they might want to move on. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Mark Henry destroying Rey Mysterio until Chavo Guerrero made the save and caused Henry to get disqualified. Pain seems imminent.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Mark Henry to complain about Chavo Guerrero costing him the World Title. Henry has injured a lot of people, like Batista, Chris Benoit, Undertaker and Kurt Angle. Now it’s time to do the same thing to Chavo, who comes out to say Henry needs some anger management. Chavo thinks Henry is trying to goad him out of retirement, so Henry says he spits on the Guerrero name. If Eddie Guerrero was here, Henry would spit on him too. Chavo comes to the ring and gets destroyed, with Rey Mysterio’s save attempt completely failing as well. Henry destroys Rey even more and leaves with a big smile.

Cruiserweight Title: Gregory Helms vs. Super Crazy

Helms is defending. Crazy goes for the leg to start and Helms bails over to the ropes in a hurry. A missile dropkick sends Helms outside and the dive connects as well. Back in and Helms catches him on top with a neck snap across the rope to take over. A swinging neckbreaker gives Helms two and we hit the chinlock. Crazy’s comeback is countered with a backbreaker but he’s fine enough to knock Helms off the top. The second dropkick sets up a standing moonsault for two on Helms….and here’s Psicosis to jump Helms for the DQ to cost Crazy the title.

Rating: C. Crazy was showing some good fire here, as it almost seems like it’s a little bit easier to be taken seriously when you don’t come to the ring on a lawn mower. The match was a speedy and fairly competitive match, but the ending was the right way to go given what they did with the Mexicools.

Post match the brawling continues with Psicosis bailing.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell yell at Teddy Long about the cage match but it isn’t being changed. Booker compares himself to Gladiator and promises to end Lashley and it’s all going to be on Long’s bald head.

Batista is back next week.

Pit Bulls vs. Marty Garner/???

The Pit Bulls are Jamie Noble/Kid Kash with the collars and chains. They jump Garner and the other guy not worth naming to get things going in a hurry. The double teaming is on and some double stomping in the corner sets up a clothesline. We hit the neck crank on not Garner and it’s back to Kash to pound him down without much effort.

Garner manages to come in and is thrown off the top in a big crash. Another clothesline lets the Pit Bulls run them over again as JBL can’t get over Garner’s pants. A powerbomb/top rope clothesline finishes Garner, with JBL saying that we haven’t seen something like the Doomsday Device since the 1990s. Yeah I’d forget about the Heidenreich experiment too.

Rating: C-. Total squash, but the Pit Bulls were showing a lot of intensity. The problem is going to be their size, but if they can go like this it can work out. Also it helps when the Tag Team Champions weigh about 119lbs soaking wet. Good enough for what it was and now they get to see where they can go from here.

Divas Search video.

Ashley Massaro, last year’s winner, says the Diva Search is about having a good time. Look at all the doors it opens up. Kristal was in the top ten and look where she is now. Kristal: “I finished fourth b****!” And she’s gone, because this is how WWE writes conversations between women.

Bobby Lashley is ready for the cage match because Booker doesn’t know what he’s in for.

Finlay vs. Matt Hardy

This is a rematch from five months ago when Finlay beat the heck out of Hardy in his debut. The Leprechaun sneaks around during Hardy’s entrance but Hardy doesn’t see him. Finlay starts fast by blasting him with a clothesline for two but Hardy is back up with some right hands. An elbow to the face and an elbow drop give Hardy two, with Finlay claiming something in his eye. That doesn’t last long as Finlay gets a boot up in the corner, only to dive into a raised boot.

Finlay is fine enough to take him down into a chinlock as JBL goes on a rant about everything Hardy does other than trying to become a top star. The turnbuckle pad is ripped off but Hardy knocks him off the top and hits the legdrop. Hardy knocks Finlay outside but the Leprechaun pulls Finlay under the ring. The distraction lets Finlay take over as the Leprechaun throws JBL a can of Guinness. The shillelagh (dang I spelled that right) is brought in so the referee takes it away, allowing Finlay to drop Hardy onto the exposed buckle. That’s enough to set up the Celtic Cross for the easy pin.

Rating: C. They beat each other up well enough here and Finlay is becoming quite the solid midcard villain. Throw in the Leprechaun somehow actually working and I’m getting into seeing Finlay every week. Granted some of that might be due to JBL being such a huge Leprechaun fan and selling the heck out of it.

Clip of the Miz winning on Fear Factor.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Gunner Scott

Scott starts in on the arm but gets poked in the eye and sent into the ropes. Some elbows to the back give Kennedy two but another one misses, allowing Scott to send him into the buckle. Kennedy slams him down by the head though and the Kenton Bomb finishes Scott in a hurry.

Rating: D+. As usual, Kennedy is much better with the talking than the actual wrestling so it isn’t quite the dominant performance. The charisma is more than enough to carry him for a long way though and that’s all that matters. Scott has completely fallen apart though, and given that he wasn’t exactly a big star in the first place, I can’t say I’m overly surprised.

Post match Kennedy loads up the catchphrase but here are Great Khali and Daivari. Kennedy bails so Khali wrecks Scott and puts him in a body bad. Daivari asks where Undertaker is and challenges him to face Khali in a Punjabi Prison match at the Great American Bash. Khali strikes Undertaker’s pose as JBL sounds terrified of actually seeing the match.

Raw Rebound.

Miz hypes up tonight’s cage match.

Earlier today, Vito, in the dress, went dress shopping. A lack of hilarity ensued.

Vito vs. Simon Dean

Dean is freaked out at Vito’s shaved legs as JBL makes various references to Vito’s orientation. Vito hammers away on Dean but gets knocked down, revealing that he is wearing women’s underwear (which are blurred out). That’s enough to send JBL into a crazed rant about how he has wrestled everywhere and spent years getting to WWE and now he is watching a man in women’s clothes facing a fitness guru on a scooter.

Dean grabs a chinlock as JBL makes all kinds of jokes about Cole. That makes Cole say that at least the underwear matches the dress. JBL: “I want hazard pay.” Vito fights back with clotheslines and a suplex, into the top rope elbow. The dress goes over Dean’s head as Vito grabs the armbar for the tap.

Rating: D. What is there even to say about the Vito stuff? It’s as cheap heat as you can get and that works out well enough, but they can’t think that this has any kind of a shelf life. JBL’s insane rants are funny though, as he sounds completely indignant that he is actually seeing this stuff (I mean…..fair enough).

Sylvan thinks you would love the Montreal nightlife.

We recap Bobby Lashley vs. King Booker. They have fought a few times in the last month and traded wins, but Lashley is tired of dealing with Booker’s goons. Therefore, it’s in a cage tonight.

US Title: King Booker vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending in a cage. William Regal is here for the All Hail King Booker chants and JBL gushes over Queen Sharmell’s beauty. Lashley starts fast by driving shoulders to the ribs in the corner but Booker sends him face first into the cage. Finlay is out here as well as Booker hammers away with right hands and chops. A suplex out of the corner gets Lashley out of trouble and Booker gets sent into the cage.

The spinebuster plants Booker again but Finlay is waiting on Lashley as he tries to get out. The cage is slammed onto Lashley’s head but he’s fine enough to grab the leg and pull Booker back inside. We take a break and come back with Lashley being sent face first into the middle buckle, only to catch Booker’s escape attempt again. The Book End plants Lashley and the ax kick does it again but it’s still not enough to let Booker escape.

Lashley is back up with an elbow to the face for two so Booker goes after the heavily taped up legs. The Boston crab goes on so Lashley makes the rope (which is good for a break in a cage match because reasons), sending JBL into a rant about the USA losing to Ghana in the World Cup. Lashley is back up with a running powerslam but Regal and Finlay are waiting on the floor with chairs to block the escape. They go up top again with Lashley tossing him down and then escaping over the top to retain (I guess Regal and Finlay were off getting peanuts).

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one as it wasn’t much of a match in the first place and then Lashley just calmly won after slamming him off the top. They didn’t play up much drama in the whole thing and Booker only remembered the big knee bandages with a few minutes left. Their previous stuff was much better and I’m not sure what went wrong here. It wasn’t a disaster but quite disappointing given what they had built up.

Lashley drops Finlay and gets out to end the show.

Well almost end the show as we get one more video for Batista’s return next week.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty weak show overall as they have all but punted on Mysterio meaning anything with the title. He has been a lame duck since he won the thing and with Batista being back next week, things are only going to get worse. The rest of the show wasn’t exactly great and felt like a bunch of stuff thrown together instead of any kind of an eventful episode. It came off as several fresh/yet to be established named being thrown out there and that doesn’t make for the best night. But then everything changes with Batista getting back next week so it doesn’t matter all that much.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

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http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6