IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 19, 2006
Location: Tingley Coliseum, Albuquerque, New Mexico
Attendance: 5,757
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Judgment Day and my goodness it’s a pretty sad world around here. World Champion Rey Mysterio is on a losing streak to various monsters and tonight he gets to face a mystery monster. Given that it’s MAY 19 and we’ve spent months on Kane talking about MAY 19 and his new movie comes out on MAY 19, I’m thinking the Great and Powerful Oz. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at JBL tormenting Mysterio and making it work, because Rey being World Champion is a pesky annoyance.

Opening sequence.

Here’s JBL in his limo to open things up. After declaring himself an American hero, he wants to acknowledge the heart of Rey Mysterio. See, Rey’s people have that machismo, which is Spanish for having more guts than brains. That’s what JBL had when he defeated Eddie Guerrero. Latinos have passion but passion doesn’t pay the bills. The fans chant for Rey, which JBL says they should do now because JBL is taking the title on Sunday. JUST LIKE HE DID FROM EDDIE GUERRERO! I’ve seen herds of cows that weren’t milked as much as Eddie.

MNM/Melina vs. Jillian Hall/Paul London/Brian Kendrick

The Fink is on commentary here and describes MNM/Melina as “the threesome that contains the WWE Tag Team Champions, MNM!” The brawl is on before the bell and we’re joined in progress after a break with Kendrick headlocking Nitro. A headlock takeover out of the corner puts Nitro down and it’s off to London to work on the arm. Mercury comes in to send London into the buckle so Kendrick comes back in to clean house.

Everything breaks down and Kendrick gets chop blocked to put him in trouble. Nitro comes in to tie up the leg and it’s back to Mercury to cannonball down on the leg. The leg twisting continues and it’s Mercury (who is incredibly sweaty) dropping an elbow on the leg to keep him in down. The breakdancing legdrop gives Nitro two (and allows Melina to scream), followed by a headscissors from Melina on the apron.

Kendrick kicks Mercury into the corner for the break though and the hot tag brings in Nitro to pick up the pace. Melina tags herself in for the catfight (and a BIG pop) until Mercury makes a save. Jillian comes in with a high crossbody (which the camera mostly misses, possibly intentionally) for the pin.

Rating: C-. I can always go for the idea of putting two feuds into a big tag match so this worked fine. They almost have to change the titles on Sunday after all of these losses, but I’ve also liked Melina vs. Jillian. No it isn’t setting the world on fire, but they’re both being intense and it comes off like they really don’t like each other. I’ll give points for trying and they’re giving it what they can so well done.

Clip of the Judgment Day press conference. The pay per view’s theme song is This Fire Burns so I keep expecting a CM Punk cameo.

Cole: “Who will be Rey Mysterio’s mystery opponent tonight?” This is followed by a See No Evil package. They never have been good with subtlety.

Video on Mark Henry injuring Kurt Angle.

Angle talks about meeting Mark Henry at the 1996 Olympics. That’s when Angle won the gold medal but Henry won…nothing. Henry has been angry ever since and tried to hurt Angle, but Kurt isn’t Batista and he’s still standing. On Sunday, Henry is learning that Angle is the best wrestler in the world.

Bobby Lashley vs. Jared Steel

Lashley knocks him into the ropes to start and hits a belly to belly suplex as the beating is on in a hurry. Some shoulders set up the gorilla press and there’s the delayed vertical suplex. The spear is good for the pin in a hurry.

Post match Lashley goes to sit on the King of the Ring throne but here are Booker T./Sharmell to interrupt. They walk by Lashley to go to the ring, which means Lashley can’t sit down for some reason.

Raw Rebound.

Gunner Scott/Chris Benoit vs. Booker T./Finlay

During the entrances, Finlay vs. Benoit is announced for Sunday. Scott and Booker lock up against the ropes to start with Booker not being thrilled at being driven into the corner. Some chops and a back elbow give Scott two but Booker thumbs him in the eye. Finlay comes in and Gunner manages to wrap his leg around the rope for a kick to said rope. You don’t do that to Finlay, who knocks him down and grabs a quickly broken chinlock.

It’s back to Booker, who hits his own chops in the corner. Scott gets two off a suplex but Booker kicks him back down for the same. The chinlock goes on and Scott seems to be bleeding from the nose or mouth. Scott manages to fight up and gets over for the hot tag to Benoit so house can be cleaned. Booker breaks up the Sharpshooter attempt so Benoit chops him as well and gets two off the German suplex. Everything breaks down and Scott gets knocked from the top to the floor in a big crash as we take a break.

Back with Scott still in trouble as Booker unloads on him against the ropes. A Russian legsweep gives Scott a breather though and the hot tag brings in Benoit to clean house. Finlay pulls Benoit to the floor for a ram into the steps though and it’s a Shillelagh shot to the ribs to make it worse.

Booker is smart enough to grab an abdominal stretch but Benoit is out in a hurry for the German suplex. It’s back to Scott for a middle rope dropkick with Finlay having to make a save. Everything breaks down again with Benoit and Finlay falling to the floor but here’s Lashley to sit on the throne. That’s enough of a distraction for Scott to grab a crucifix for the surprise pin.

Rating: B-. This was an intense match with everyone working hard. It might not have happened yet, but it’s nice to see them trying something with Scott. You can always go with trying someone new in a spot and maybe it will work out for him. The match was good too, with some back and forth action and Benoit and Finlay beating the heck out of each other. Having them do it again on their own on Sunday should be just fine.

Tatanka is now part of the Lakota Tribe and will debut next week. I can’t wait either.

Here’s Daivari to explain why Undertaker is scared of Great Khali. We see a video of Undertaker’s dominance over the years, only to have Khali destroy him with such ease. Back in the arena, Khali comes out to say “rest in peace.” At least that’s what commentary claims he said.

Mark Henry vs. Matt Hardy

This show loves its monsters. Hardy knocks him to the floor and drops an ax handle from the apron. A posting lets Hardy hit the middle rope legdrop for one, meaning it’s time for the destruction to begin. Henry forearms him in the back and grabs the bearhug but Hardy is out in a hurry. The Twist of Fate attempt is countered into a World’s Strongest Slam for the pin.

Post match Henry tells Angle to watch this and hits some splashes.

Another See No Evil video.

Vito and Guido are ready to go out again but here is Paul Burchill to say he saw Vito in a dress too. Guido doesn’t believe it.

Judgment Day rundown.

Rey Mysterio vs. ???

Non-title but before we find out who the opponent is, here’s JBL for commentary and a pre-match chat. After saying we’re in Albuquerque, North Mexico, JBL asks Rey if he knows what the date is. Rey: “May 19.” JBL:” YOU SAID IT NOT ME!” Cue Kane and we’re ready to go. Kane punches him down to start and the beating is on as Cole is losing his mind on commentary. Rey kicks at the legs but gets knocked out of the air as Cole goes on about JBL being sick.

A two arm chokeslam drops Rey again and Kane drops him face first onto the steps. JBL again talks about how the fans are chanting for Eddie instead of Rey, which really doesn’t do much good for Rey but that might be the least of his problems. Rey gets knocked down again but the lights go red.

Kane’s voice comes onto the loudspeaker to talk about how it’s May 19^th and it’s happening again. A 619 hits Kane but he’s right back with a chokeslam as the lights come back on. Kane goes to leave but JBL says Rey is the one who said May 19, earning himself a chokeslam to end the show. No finish to the match so things are looking up for Mysterio.

Rating: D. This was barely a match and wasn’t quite a shocking surprise. I’m sure it’s supposed to be all better when Rey retains over JBL, but JBL has been right on almost every point so far. The racist stuff is the only heel part about him (granted that’s a big part) though and otherwise, it’s really hard to cheer for Rey at this point, when he’s being presented as a face version of the heel who loses all the time but keeps pointing to the title like it makes everything ok.

Overall Rating: C-. That tag match in the middle helped but man alive that main event stuff is killing everything else on the show. The worst part is we’re probably going to see even more of it after Sunday as Rey beating JBL is the kind of thing that would make WWE think everything is equal. Not their worst show, but one match is all that’s keeping it afloat this week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 15, 2006
Location: United Spirit Arena, Lubbock, Texas
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Things are getting interesting around here as we have the mostly uncombined forces of John Cena, Shawn Michaels and HHH vs. Vince and Shane McMahon, plus the Spirit Squad. It’s certainly a different enough looking feud and I’m curious about how it is going to go. Throw in the new alliance of Edge/Mick Foley/Lita and things are actually getting good. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. HHH

Raw World Title/Intercontinental Title: John Cena/Rob Van Dam vs. Shelton Benjamin/HHH/Chris Masters

Cena and Van Dam are defending, there are no tags and one fall to a finish. It’s a brawl to start with Cena and HHH brawling on the floor while Van Dam hurricanranas Shelton. Van Dam hits a big running flip dive to take everyone out and we take a break. Back with Cena hitting a running shoulder into a powerslam but HHH sends him outside.

Shelton hits a spinwheel kick to send Cena over the barricade and it’s Van Dam getting triple teamed. HHH and Shelton get in an argument over the pin so Masters puts Van Dam in the Masterlock, which is the smartest thing he has ever done. That’s broken up so Van Dam spinwheel kicks Benjamin and Cena is back in for the running clotheslines.

There’s the Shuffle to Masters but Cena has to backdrop his way out of the Pedigree. Masters breaks up the STF on Benjamin but Rob comes back in with the Five Star. HHH gives Van Dam the Pedigree and there’s an FU to Masters. Another Pedigree takes Cena down but Shelton covers Van Dam for the Intercontinental Title just a second before HHH covers Cena for a nice annoyed visual from HHH.

Rating: C+. This was a complete action match and I liked the concept. There’s something fun about the complete insanity and having different options for people to win titles. Shelton getting the title back is a little annoying but Van Dam can move on with the briefcase, which is a lot more important anyway.

During the break, HHH wasn’t interested in commenting.

Here’s Trish Stratus, with the arm still in a sling, for a chat. She and Mickie James have some unfinished business so get down here right now. Mickie comes down and she’s ready to go but the blonde fan from last week jumps in. The fan chases Mickie off and Trish names her as Beth. The new woman shouts that Mickie is a psycho and Beth isn’t forgetting what Mickie did to her.

Clip from the See No Evil premiere with a bunch of wrestlers in attendance.

This week in wrestling history: Bruno Sammartino b. Buddy Rogers in 48 seconds to win the World Title. This isn’t on the Network for some reason.

Shane McMahon comes in to see HHH, who wants to know what that was. Apparently that was HHH’s title shot so now it’s time for HHH to return the favor. Shane mentions the main event, where he’ll be the guest referee. I’m not sure what that has to do with HHH but how else were they going to make that announcement?

Tag Team Titles: Spirit Squad vs. Goldust/Snitsky

The Squad (Johnny/Nicky) is defending. Johnny’s headlock doesn’t work so it’s off to Goldust for the jumping hip attack. Nicky comes in and gets his arm cranked a bit until the rest of the Squad trips Goldust down. The front facelock keeps Goldust in trouble and a clothesline gives Johnny two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Goldust fights up for the powerslam. The hot tag brings in Snitsky to clean house but it’s a springboard bulldog from Mikey to put him down and give Johnny the retaining pin.

Rating: D+. There was no drama and it was the usual shenanigans from the Squad. They’re exciting enough with the trampoline and all that jazz, but they work a lot better as the goons than as the team holding the titles. It was passable for a short enough match, but that’s about all you can give it here.

Here’s Mick Foley, who says it’s true: Melina was looking at him at Kane’s movie premiere (Foley: “YES!”). As for last week, it’s true that he attacked Tommy Dreamer and kissed Lita, the girlfriend of his sworn enemy, on the hand. He owes us an apology, so he does just that but since Tommy Dreamer can’t be here due to a bad reaction to a barbed wire baseball bat.

Instead, Foley has a special guest: TERRY FUNK, complete with a clip of the dumpster match from Wrestlemania XIV. Foley gives him a warm greeting but Terry says not so fast Cactus. Funk wants to know why Foley did what he did to Tommy Dreamer. Foley: “You don’t want to know.” Mick talks about the history he made with Edge at Wrestlemania but now you have ECW freaks coming in and trying to talk about hardcore.

There are three things Foley will defend with his life: the honor of his wife, the honor of his children and the honor of his legacy as a hardcore wrestling. Funk says Foley is ECW, which means he’s family. They have broken each others’ bones over the years and fought together, but Funk has always put his arm around Foley. Funk says Foley is like a son to him and they hug, with Foley seeming touched.

Foley says this is the first time they have been in a WWE ring together since 1998, but it wasn’t supposed to be that long. Back in 2003, Foley was honored in a ceremony on Raw with all of the hardcore legends….except Terry Funk. Foley asked where Funk was but was told that Terry was at home because he wanted too much money to be there. Funk gets serious and Foley tells him to shut his mouth.

Foley is going to get a phone call a few years from now, saying that Funk is gone and they want him at the funeral. He’ll come but it’s going to cost a lot of money to make Foley come to a dump like west Texas. Foley will cash in the frequent flier miles if he has to but he’ll there just so he can spit on Funk’s grave. Funk: “YOU GOT YOUR NERVE FOLEY! I’M GONNA JOHN WAYNE YOUR A**!”

Funk tells him to take his best shot and slaps him in the face over and over but Foley won’t fight back. Funk: “Hey Foley! If I had a head like yours, I’d have it circumcised!” That’s almost too far for Foley, so Funk says it again. Foley goes to leave so Funk says his wife is a wh***. Funk: “HEY FOLEY! HEY FOLEY! YOUR KIDS ARE B*******!” Funk says the WWE sucked and that’s enough to get Foley swinging but Funk punches him back. Cue Edge, who gets knocked into the corner as well but Lita gets in a low blow. A barbed wire bat shot puts Funk down and it’s Mr. Socko into the spear to leave Funk laying.

The Funk vs. Foley stuff was outstanding for more than a few reasons. First and foremost, it’s Terry Funk, who is someone where the more I see of him, the more in awe I am of him. He has been around forever but there is such a reputation there that you can’t help but respect him. On top of that, he is such an awesome promo that you believe every single thing he says.

Then there’s Foley, who is a legend in his own right but you can feel the respect that he has for Funk. It’s such a personal connection and that is the kind of thing that made Foley seem vulnerable. You can see both sides of this and why Foley is angry, but Funk is trying to patch things up and Foley is having none of it. Then Funk pushed every button the Foley told him would work and it all spilled out from there.

In other words, they set up the stakes, they gave it an emotional aspect and then it all played out as it should have. This was two great talkers doing what they know how to do and sucking the fans in the whole way. The history between them made this the kind of thing that was going to work for these two more than anyone else. This was excellent and I was pulled all the way into it at the beginning and never left.

Here’s Matt Striker to insult Texas for not being that smart. Oh and immigrants are bad.

Matt Striker vs. Eugene

Eugene has a big red cowboy hat and Striker cracks up a bit. After a run around the ring with the hat, Eugene gets caught in the corner and the beating begins. A cravate and some shouting has Eugene in trouble, followed by the right hands to the head. Striker calls him a moron, but then does the moronic thing of ramming him head first into the buckle. The comeback is on and it’s the big boot into the legdrop for two. Striker grabs a neckbreaker though and puts a knee on the back of Eugene’s neck before snapping him backwards onto the knee (Zack Ryder’s Zack Attack) for the pin in a hurry. This was fine.

Video on Kane as the movie press junket continues.

We look back at the double title match earlier.

Maria asks Carlito why he attacked Matt Striker and Eugene last week. Carlito ignores the question to hit on her but she likes the Spit Or Swallow shirt. I think you know where this is going and Carlito finds it cool.

Vince McMahon is trying to kiss Candice Michelle when an annoyed HHH comes in. Vince praises him a bit and hands him a sledgehammer to bash Shawn Michaels’ head in. Do that, and it’s a new era. Vince: “Go get em champ.”

Armando Alejandro Estrada introduces Umaga’s opponent. He is the toughest man in Texas, but Umaga (now officially dubbed the Samoan Bulldozer) isn’t from Texas.

Umaga vs. Chris Wellman

The running splash in the corner starts the destruction (Estrada: “I think that hurt.”) and it continues on the floor, complete with a choke toss off the steps for a good crash. Back in and it’s the corner headbutt into the running hip attack into the Samoan Spike for the easy pin. Another total squash.

Smackdown Rebound.

The Spirit Squad has a special cheer for Shane McMahon.

Third look at See No Evil.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kenny

Shane McMahon is guest referee and HHH, with sledgehammer, is in Kenny’s corner. Shawn wastes no time in knocking Kenny outside before hammering away in the corner back inside. Shane gets in a cheap shot so Kenny can hammer away but Shawn takes it to the floor. Some chops rock Kenny but Shane throws Shawn off the top to put him in trouble again. Kenny gets a quick DDT for a quicker two and a jumping back elbow to the face gets the same.

Shane takes off his belt, hands it to Kenny, and can’t help but yawn. The belt goes around Shawn’s throat and we hit the chinlock. Kenny holds Shawn up and Shane tells HHH to do it now. Shawn fights out and hits the flying forearm before taking the belt away to send Shane running.

The top rope elbow hits Kenny and it’s Sweet Chin Music to knock him silly. Shane is back to hit three straight backbreakers and hold Shawn up for HHH. The sledgehammer hits Shane by mistake and knows he screwed up. Cue Vince to wave medics down and hold Shane like he’s been shot. HHH apologizes and leaves to end the show as the match is a no contest.

Rating: D+. This was as good as it could have been as it was angle advancement rather than a match. There was no need for it to be anything else as the Spirit Squad isn’t going to go any higher or lower with or without a win. HHH screwing up and hitting Shane means Vince isn’t going to be happy and you can feel the momentum for the turn coming. They’re taking their time though, as they should. You can’t turn a huge villain like HHH face instantly so he should be taking his time. Oh and Shawn was here too.

Overall Rating: B-. The show was starting off rather well but then it hit a big bump halfway through. The Foley/Funk segment was very good and the opener was very energized, but then the main event and the squash matches didn’t exactly help things. Overall it’s a good show and I want to see where some of these things go, so they’re doing something right. Just get rid of the bad and they’ll have a hit on their hands.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 12, 2006
Location: ipayoneCenter, San Diego, California
Attendance: 11,700
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re on the way to Judgment Day and that means it’s going to be a bad night for Rey Mysterio. Last week he got destroyed by Mark Henry and tonight it’s probably going to be the Great Khali. But hey, at least he can beat JBL at the pay per view and that makes up for everything, right? Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Rey Mysterio becoming the underdog World Champion and getting destroyed by Mark Henry last week. Tonight it gets even worse with Great Khali.

Here’s John Bradshaw Layfield, who set up Mysterio’s battles with the giants, to get things going. He talks about how Rey is “a tough little Mexican fighter” and worries that Rey is going to take his innertube back to Mexico. The fans stop to chant for Eddie, who JBL agrees was great, but JBL was greater. Then he took the US Title from Chris Benoit and at Judgment Day he’s going to be the first ever double champion.

After that, he’ll offer Rey’s family a job. Dominik can shine his boots, Rey’s wife can do his dishes in a short little Latino dress, but Rey can sell drugs, get into prostitution or work a donkey show in Tijuana. Rey finally comes out to clear the ring in a hurry. JBL can say these things with some conviction, but dang the times have changed.

Super Crazy vs. Nunzio vs. Kid Kash

The winner gets Gregory Helms, on commentary, for the Cruiserweight Title at the pay per view. It’s a brawl to start with Crazy being sent outside and Nunzio being backdropped out after him. Everyone gets back in for an exchange of rollups for two each until Kash’s clothesline gets two on Nunzio. Kash kicks Nunzio off the top and hits his moonsault for two more with Crazy making the save. Crazy covers both of them for a near fall each and Nunzio makes his own save. Nunzio loads Crazy up in a Doomsday Device but Crazy victory rolls him for the pin as Kash misses the high crossbody.

Rating: C. It was fine enough action but there was no hiding how unimportant everything they were doing was here. The Cruiserweight Title hasn’t meant anything in years and you can see how far it is falling almost every week. Points for trying to do something and having an action packed match, but this was the popcorn/nacho portion of the show.

The returning Kurt Angle storms into Teddy Long’s office to demand a match with Mark Henry. Long says no because Angle isn’t cleared so Angle grabs him by the jacket. The match is on for the pay per view.

Gymini vs. Mike Wellington/Joey Ryan

The Gymini are Jesse and Jake, while Ryan (yes that Ryan) has belt loops on his trunks. Jake powers Wellington to the apron to start and hits a clothesline back inside. Ryan comes in and gets kicked in the head, followed by a double shoulder for a bonus. Some elbows to the back of the head set up a chinlock, with Jesse pulling the hair. Wellington gets slammed onto Ryan and a double toss into the air for a big crash finishes Ryan without much effort.

Rating: D+. There is something rather cathartic about seeing Joey Ryan getting beaten up. Total destruction here of course as WWE has almost always known how to push two big monsters like this. I’m not sure how far they can go from here, but they can do this match well enough, especially given how short it was.

Various wrestlers like the See No Evil premiere, with Kurt Angle having to hide behind Viscera.

We look at Finlay beating Chris Benoit to make the semifinals of the King of the Ring.

Here are Booker T. and Sharmell for a chat. Booker is upset that Kurt Angle was thrown out of the tournament because he was looking forward to the match. He doesn’t want a forfeit so Angle can come out and face him right now (Angle was escorted from the building after talking to Long). Booker even gives him a ten count, with a pause for one last beg at nine, before declaring himself the winner. The celebration is on, complete with spinning Sharmell around and a Spinarooni.

King of the Ring Semifinals: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

They fight over a lockup to start with Lashley eventually powering him into the corner. Lashley takes him down with an explosive single leg but Finlay is back up with a clothesline. The chinlock goes on for a good while before Lashley is back up with a big boot. A gorilla press gutbuster has Finlay in trouble and a running clothesline in the corner rocks him again.

Some forearms gets Finlay out of trouble though and he chokes with the ring skirt. The chinlock goes on again and a pull of the trunks takes Lashley down again. Cue Booker and Sharmell, with the former sitting on the throne to see Lashley get his knees up to stop a splash. Lashley gets caught in the ring skirt for another beating though and we take a break.

Back with Finlay working on an arm, with an elbow into the shoulder for a bonus. A running shoulder gives Finlay two but Lashley gets fired up and snap off the overhead belly to belly. The running powerslam connects but Finlay blocks the spear with a boot. Finlay throws in the chair and grabs the Shillelagh, the latter of which is taken away. The referee is dumb enough to get rid of it, allowing Finlay to get in a chair shot. Lashley shrugs it off and hits the spear for the pin.

Rating: C+. The chinlocks took something out of this but they made Lashley look like a monster and that’s the important part. Lashley is showing some different offense out there most weeks and that’s an encouraging sign for someone who could do three moves and get by on his look alone. Finlay continues to be a nice gem and they worked well together.

Post match Lashley tells Booker to get out of his chair before he gets thrown out.

Here are MNM for a chat. Johnny Nitro says they’re the hot team and the sexiest champions of the century. They don’t like Paul London and Brian Kendrick getting in their way, which is why they got three straight Snapshots last week. After we see a clip from last week, Melina talks about how those punks are just trying to get a rub from the champs. Cue Jillian Hall, who talks about beating up Melina at the makeup table. Melina says Jillian looked better with the growth on her face. The fight is almost on but here are London and Kendrick to pants the champs. Hall rips off Melina’s skirt too and the good guys run.

Mark Henry vs. Paul Burchill

We get the debut of Henry’s signature song. Henry clotheslines him down and hits a kick in the ribs as this is feeling squashish. Burchill is tossed outside in a heap (with one hand) and Henry throws him back inside for a bonus. There’s the running splash in the corner and a second one against the post has Burchill pretty much done. Back in and Henry hits two more splashes, grabs the mic to say Kurt Angle is getting the same thing. The World’s Strongest Slam is good for the pin.

Rating: D. This was little more than a way to keep Henry warm before his match with Angle. It was nothing we hadn’t seen before but there was only so much you can get out of this version of Henry. Also, so much for Burchill, but how long was a Pirates of the Caribbean tribute character going to last?

Tatanka is still becoming a Lakota warrior.

Big Vito says he and Nunzio are going out tonight. Nunzio needs to go get a shower but Orlando Jordan cuts him off, saying that he saw someone who looked a lot like Vito in drag in a club in London. Nunzio doesn’t buy it.

Judgment Day rundown.

Rey Mysterio vs. Great Khali

Rating: F. What do you even say here? This came off as more of Vince and WWE being annoyed at the fans for wanting something and punishing them for it after giving them what they asked for. They do this with so many of their titles and then wonder why it isn’t as important or why the fans are walking away. It made Mysterio, who could potentially draw some money, look like nothing and Khali isn’t likely to get a title shot anytime soon, but at least they advanced Mysterio vs. JBL, which I’m sure people will be flocking to pay for. I remember thinking this was stupid in 2006 and it is even worse now, which doesn’t surprise me.

Post match JBL gets in Rey’s face to talk about how he let everyone down. JBL has another opponent for next week. Tick tock. JBL shoves him to the floor to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Well that happened. This was not WWE’s finest hour as they don’t seem to have a clue about what they want to do here so the solution is to squash the World Champion on back to back weeks. It was a rough sit as this show doesn’t exactly have star power and they are going out of their way to damage the star power that they do have. Bad show here, and WWE isn’t helping itself.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 8, 2006
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 15,290
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

I’m not sure what the focus is going to be here as we had the big Joey Styles angle last week, along with what looks to be Shawn Michaels/HHH vs. the McMahons/the Spirit Squad. That could make for some interesting moments, as could Edge vs. Mick Foley in another hardcore match, which probably won’t be as good as Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of what seems to be the beginning of HHH vs. Vince McMahon, which might be putting HHH/Shawn Michaels vs. Vince N Pals. What could go wrong there?

Opening sequence.

Hey JR is back. That’s an improvement.

Here’s HHH for a chat. He isn’t out here to be a referee or fight with Vince McMahon. The only thing he wants to do is be the WWE Champion so John Cena needs to get out here right now. Cue Cena, to say HHH has ten championships. The New York Yankees have like twenty seven, but that doesn’t mean they get the easy pass to the World Series. Cena knows what HHH has done, but around here, what has he done lately? Actually who cars because we can have a title match right now. HHH is pleasantly surprised and says get a referee down here.

Instead he gets Vince, who says this isn’t happening right now. HHH says he knows Vince wanted Kenny to win the title, but that would just be going from a poser to a cheerleader. Cena says hang on because there’s nothing wrong with being a poser. He had some great poses after he pinned HHH and after he made HHH tap out. HHH says his favorite Cena pose was him being flat on his back after HHH knocked him out.

Cena looks ready to go so HHH appeals to Vince, but that’s Mr. McMahon to him. Vince is the boss, not his friend, but he’ll change his mind: HHH can have a title match, just not tonight. Instead, he has the rest of the night off, but Cena doesn’t. Instead, Cena can team up with Shawn Michaels against the Spirit Squad. Cena tells Vince what he can kiss but Vince says cut the mic. For right now, let’s have a four way for the Intercontinental Title.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Charlie Haas vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Masters

Van Dam is defending and has a quick staredown with Cena on the way to the ring. Before the match, Van Dam agrees with everything Joey Styles had to say and it was a gutsy move to say them. Instead of hearing RVD, Van Dam wants to hear ECW. Masters and Benjamin jump the other two to start and it’s a double shoulder to Haas. Rob comes back in and starts striking away, including the top rope kick to Masters. More kicks take down Haas and Benjamin and we take a break.

Back with Rob in trouble for a change and the fans ignoring his pro-ECW chanting wishes. Rolling Thunder hits Benjamin as Haas is sent outside, leaving Benjamin to suplex Van Dam. Haas comes back in for some dropkicks and another suplex gets two on Rob. Masters gets sent outside but Benjamin kicks Haas down for two of his own. Rob gets some fast twos on Shelton, who is right back with a backbreaker on the champ. Back up and Benjamin grabs a Samoan drop on Haas but gets clotheslined by Masters. There’s the Masterlock to Haas but Van Dam comes in with a top rope sunset flip to pin Masters and retain.

Rating: C. This didn’t have a ton of time when you took out the commercial but it was nice to see Van Dam overcome some odds to retain. Giving him win after win is going to make him seem like a much more viable challenger for the World Title when he gets the chance. Wins and losses do matter in something like this and I’m really not sure why that is so hard to figure out.

We look at See No Evil, with the production crew thinking Kane is a little out there.

The cast of See No Evil is here to say Kane really is evil. Cue Kane to choke one of them out. Neither of these two segments are on the Network.

Carlito vs. Matt Striker

Carlito wastes no time in hitting a dropkick but gets taken down with a backbreaker. Striker hammers away and we’re in the early chinlock. Some clotheslines get Carlito out of trouble and there’s the springboard back elbow. Cue Eugene to go after Striker for the fast DQ.

Post match Carlito beats up Striker and gives Eugene a Backstabber, as he should.

Edge vs. Mick Foley

Hardcore and Edge and Lita are dressed like they were at Wrestlemania. Before the match, Edge says in real life, the bad guys win so Foley can get out here and take his beating. Foley has his own barbed wire baseball bat and since they had the best hardcore match ever, whoever wins tonight is going to be the best hardcore wrestler in the world today. However, we can’t do that without having ECW included, which is why this match is being changed.

Edge vs. Mick Foley vs. Tommy Dreamer

Hardcore. Edge bails to the floor to start so Foley hits Dreamer in the back with a barbed wire bat. Foley hands it off to Edge for a shot to Dreamer’s face and the double beatdown is on, with Lita getting in for a bonus. Mr. Socko goes on and Edge adds a spear for a double pin on Dreamer.

Post match Foley kisses Lita’s hand and the three leave together.

Mickie James vs. Maria

Non-title and Maria has Trish Stratus, with her arm in a sling, in her corner. An early Trish distraction lets Maria grab a rollup for two but Mickie kicks her down. Some rather taunting shots to the face set up the MickieDT for the easy pin.

Post match Mickie stays on Maria so Trish comes in to stare her down. Mickie beats her down anyway, so here’s a blonde “fan” to jump Mickie until security breaks it up. Mickie screams that the woman ruins everything as the woman is arrested. I think we’ll be seeing the blonde woman again.

Umaga vs. Kevin Martenson/Tommy Wilson

Martenson is still floating around the indies today. The destruction is on in a hurry with Wilson being sent outside, leaving Martenson to be choke suplexed off the top. The Tree of Woe headbutt connects and there’s the running hip attack against the barricade. Wilson takes the Samoan Spike for the easy pin. Total devastation, as it should have been.

Kane vs. Big Show

They start with a fist bump and then actually go to the mat for the technical exchange (someone pull up the Twilight Zone theme). Show takes him down with a drop toehold and JR (JR: “Well cut off my legs and call me shorty.”) is more than a little surprised. Show picks him up for the takedown and Kane looks a little impressed.

They fight over a hammerlock until Show drop toeholds him down. Kane is back up with a hammerlock of his own before sending Show face first into the middle buckle. Then the red lights are back on and, with Kane’s old mask on the screen, Kane’s voice says it’s happening again on May 19. The lights come back up and Kane grabs a chair to unload on Show.

Rating: D+. Well they certainly did something different before getting to the stupid ending. I really can’t wait for the movie to come out so we can get on from this already, as it isn’t exactly much more than Kane hearing voices and saying the date over and over. It’s fine for a weird marketing campaign, but it gets annoying having it take over everything Kane does for the last few weeks.

The Spirit Squad fires itself up.

Spirit Squad vs. Shawn Michaels/John Cena

Non-title. Shawn and Kenny start things off with Kenny shouting about how Shawn cost him the title last week. That earns him some slaps to the face and it’s Cena coming in to face Nicky. They go to the mat with Nicky getting the better of it until Cena fights up with the running shoulders. The Squad bails to the floor and Kenny is tossed onto the rest of the team for the big crash as we take a break.

Back with Cena cleaning house but Johnny uses the distraction to hit a spinwheel kick for two. Cena is sent outside and it’s the trampoline clothesline to take him down again. They head back inside and Kenny gets to unload in the corner, followed by the jumping back elbow for two. We hit the neck crank for a bit before Cena misses a running crossbody. Nicky comes in for two off some right hands and we hit the sleeper.

A running knee to the head gets two and it’s right back to the neck crank. Cena fights up but gets caught by a cheap shot from the apron. The group beatdown sets up a suplex for two on Cena but Johnny misses a Swanton. The diving tag brings in Shawn to clean house, including the flying forearm into the nip up as everything breaks down. In the melee, Kenny gets in a title shot to Shawn for the quick pin.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t supposed to be anything great but they also made sure to get to the point. There is no shame in having two top stars losing to a group of five people with cheating involved so it worked as well as anything else they could do to keep the Squad looking like threats.

Post match Kenny decks the referee and steals his belt to whip Shawn. Cena fights back but walks into a Pedigree from HHH to end the show. Works for me for the pay per view level Raw main event.

Overall Rating: C+. They’re doing some things around here which make me curious to see more. The Edge/Foley stuff is a nice twist and hopefully means we get some evil Foley promos in the future. I’m also digging the HHH face turn as he really does need to do something fresh after so many years of being the big bad. That stuff is all working, but at the same time you have the Spirit Squad, Eugene/Matt Striker and the See No Evil campaign. The good is rather good, but the other end is dragging it down hard. Overall, good stuff though and I want to see where it’s going.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 5, 2006
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s time to start building towards the next Smackdown pay pr view as Backlash has come and gone. Therefore, it’s time for Rey Mysterio to continue looking like the weakest World Champion in history, which kind of defeats the purpose of making him the World Champion in the first place. It’s rather sad to see but that’s what you get around here sometimes. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event where Kurt Angle had Rey Mysterio in a lot of trouble until Mark Henry ran in for the DQ. Henry destroyed Angle after the match.

Opening sequence.

The fans chant for EDDIE, with JBL saying how it’s always either for EDDIE or JBL because no one cares about Rey. Anyway, there are always places for illegals to take out his garbage or clean his house. It’s the size of the fight in the dog. Rey asks if JBL is calling his people dogs. JBL: “You’re not a dog Rey. You’re a Mexican.” JBL goes on a rant about Rey living off of Eddie’s legacy so Rey says he’ll fight anyone, anytime. That works for JBL, so Rey can fight this man tonight. Cue Mark Henry, who just happened to be standing behind the curtain I guess. The staredown is on and I don’t see this going well. Again.

Booker T. vs. Gunner Scott

Rematch from three weeks ago where Scott scored a big upset. During the entrances, Cole announces that Booker is going to the King of the Ring finals because Kurt Angle has injured ribs and can’t compete. Booker runs him over to start and elbows his way out of a hammerlock attempt. Scott strikes his way out of the corner, only to get caught in a hot shot. We hit the chinlock but Scott fights up with more strikes. Some suplexes have Booker in trouble until he hits the hook kick to the face. A Sharmell distraction sets up the ax kick to give Booker the pin.

Rating: D+. This was a way to right the ship after Booker lost a few weeks back and doesn’t get the King of the Ring match. I’m not sure how much Booker needed the win, but at least he gets some momentum heading into a bigger match. Booker could make for a pretty good king, and the fact that he is talking about it more than anyone else would suggest he is a likely candidate.

Post match, Booker is proud of his win over Gunner somebody and promises to win the tournament. His subjects need to get used to bowing down.

Tag Team Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. MNM

Video on Tatanka entering a Lakota sweat lodge to be purified so he can become a warrior.

Great Khali and Daivari come in to see Teddy Long, who has a contract signed by Undertaker for a match at Judgment Day. Khali growls a bit.

King of the Ring First Round: Finlay vs. Chris Benoit

The winner gets Lashley in the semifinals. Finlay drives him into the corner to start but doesn’t get very far. Benoit gets it to the mat for a headlock and then switches to an armbar to counter Finlay’s counter. Finlay winds up mounting Benoit, who punches his way from the mat to get out. Back up and they go nose to nose until Finlay starts slugging away to knock Benoit into the corner.

That earns him a leg takedown with Benoit cranking on the leg. The hold sends Finlay over to the ropes for the break as the chess game continues. Benoit gets sent shoulder first into the post and it’s time to work on an armbar. Some shoulders are driven into Benoit’s shoulder so he sweeps the leg for a failed Sharpshooter attempt. The top of Benoit’s head has been busted open (not that badly) and he can’t get the Crossface t make things even worse.

The release German suplex works though and Finlay comes up holding his shoulder. It’s so banged up that he rolls outside and throws in some chairs as we take a break. Back with Benoit getting two more off a snap suplex but getting sent chest first into the buckle. We hit the chinlock until Benoit jawbreaks his way to freedom, only to get pulled down into another facelock.

Finlay sends him into the corner but misses a charge into the post. The rolling German suplexes set up a missed Swan Dive but Benoit ducks a Shillelagh shot. With the referee getting rid of the club, Finlay gets in a chair shot, setting up the Celtic Cross for the pin to advance.

Rating: B. This was a good example of a match with two guys beating the heck out of each other for a long time and it was rather entertaining. They kept Benoit looking strong in defeat and Finlay gets one of the biggest wins of his WWE tenure. Sometimes you need two people beating the fire out of each other until one of them is done and that’s what you got.

Gymini vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Funaki

Simon Dean fires the Gymini up before the bell. We’ll say Gymini #1 puts Funaki on the top rope to start and #2 pulls him down to the floor in a crash. Back in and #2 stomps in the corner and we hit the chinlock. There’s a butterfly suplex to drop Funaki again but this time he rolls over and brings in Scotty, who gets suplexed down in a hurry. The Crash Diet (kind of a double powerbomb) finishes Scotty in a hurry.

Rating: D+. Total squash here, but does beating up Scotty and Funaki really mean that much? You can only get so far off a match like this and it feels like the Gymini debuted months ago. It isn’t a hard gimmick to make work, but they’re managing to make two muscleheaded twins look like a big waste of time. That’s hard to do.

Video on See No Evil.

Bobby Lashley comes in to see Booker T., who is in a towel. They both promise violence.

Super Crazy vs. Kid Kash vs. Nunzio

The winner gets a title shot at the pay per view. They start with the rapid exchange of shots to the face until the Sicilian Slice gets two on Crazy. Kash and Nunzio are sent outside for the top rope Lionsault from Crazy….and here’s Great Khali to destroy them all for the no contest.

Khali destroys them all for a bonus feature.

Raw Rebound.

Judgment Day rundown, with Khali having accepted Undertaker’s challenge and Melina vs. Jillian Hall confirmed.

Rey Mysterio vs. Mark Henry

Non-title and JBL is on commentary. After the same video that opened the show, we’re ready to go. Rey starts dodging around to start but nearly gets caught after a chase around the ring. Back in and Henry slugs away, only to get knocked down in a hurry. JBL goes after Rey on the floor and gets sent over the announcers’ table.

Back in and Rey’s springboard is knocked out of the air, which JBL says is like Henry eating Rey like a $3.99 pizza buffet. Cole and JBL argue about whether underdogs or rich people built America as Henry runs Rey over. Some missed charges in the put Henry down and Rey reverses the World’s Strongest Slam. A dropkick to the back sets up the 619 but Henry pulls him out of the air for the World’s Strongest Slam and the pin.

Rating: D+. And so one of the lamest World Title reigns of all time gets to continue because WWE thinks this is what you’re supposed to do to make fans pay for a big show at the end of the month. If you don’t want Mysterio as the champion, just have him drop the title already, because this isn’t helping the title in the slightest. I guess Vince found it funny or something though and that’s all we’ve got.

Post match Henry drags him up to the stage and loads up a splash off the set but JBL runs up to say no. JBL promises him the first title shot when he beats Rey, because if Henry crushes him then there’s no title shot. With Rey still down, JBL makes Mysterio vs. Great Khali for next week in Rey’s hometown of San Diego.

Overall Rating: D. What a strange show. This was a bunch of pretty bad matches with one really good one stuck in the middle. That’s not enough to save the rest of it though and we get this kind of a show, which only left me wanting to get through the pay per view so we can move on to anything else.

So far JBL has humiliated Rey, pointed out that no one really likes him, or even chant for him for that matter. Then you have Rey ready to lose to Angle and then actually lose to Henry here. Imagine any other face World Champion ever being presented like that and see how fast you get a quick headache. Benoit vs. Finlay was good, but that was nowhere near enough to save us from the really bad main event angle.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 1, 2006
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler

Backlash has come and gone and that means things are going to be slowing down a little bit. There is no Raw pay per view in May so the next one is coming up in June with One Night Stand. The big story coming out of last night saw HHH pretty much turning face despite losing in the main event where John Cena retained the World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here is Backlash if you need a recap.

Vince McMahon brags about beating Shawn Michaels and God so tonight, he’s taking the night off. As for tonight, the Spirit Squad is in charge as the co-General Managers. The team comes in and says Kenny is going to face John Cena for the World Title, thanks to winning a Spirit Straw drawing. This is going to be a very loud night.

Opening sequence.

Torrie Wilson/Maria vs. Victoria/Mickie James

As per the Spirit Squad’s orders, they’re all in cheerleaders outfits. Mickie and Victoria jump them to start and it’s Torrie in early trouble. She manages a drop toehold to bring Victoria down though and it’s off to Maria to beat up both villains at once. Torrie gives Victoria a Stink Face and Maria hits a Bronco Buster on Mickie, which just annoys Victoria all over again. Mickie tries to suplex Maria back inside but here’s Trish to trip her up, giving Maria the fluke pin.

Spirit Squad vs. Eugene/Snitsky/Goldust

The unlikely trio is dubbed the Odd Squad. Goldust and Mikey (Why did they drop the gear that had their names?) start but it’s quickly off to Eugene to chop him in the head. Eugene misses a charge into the post as we see Candice Michelle sitting on Vince’s lap. Nicky comes in to beat on Eugene and get two and Johnny grabs a chinlock. Eugene fights up and hits a Rock Bottom on Mikey, allowing the hot tag to Snitsky. That means a big boot to Nicky so Johnny comes back in. Everything breaks down and the Johnny Go Round kick finishes Eugene.

Rating: D+. This was just a showcase win for the Spirit Squad and it worked out as well as could be expected. The Spirit Squad is good enough and that means they can get a little something out of a nothing match like this. If nothing else they didn’t bother with drama here because it would have been a pretty big waste of time.

During the break, Mickie James beat up Maria during the Kiss Cam.

Eugene is asked how it feels to lose, sending him into a far more coherent than usual talk about how he still has a job, unlike his Uncle Eric. Matt Striker jumps him with a dictionary.

This Week In Wrestling History: Vince McMahon and Shane McMahon beat Shawn Michaels and God at Backlash 2006.

The Spirit Squad comes in to see Shawn (with Big Show and Charlie Haas for a weird trio). Tonight, he can have the night off as a wrestler but he’s going to be the referee for Kane vs. Rob Conway. Oh and he has a special referee shirt with MAY 19 written all over.

We look back at Kane going nuts against Big Show last night. You remember: when we could hear his thoughts for some reason.

Kane vs. Rob Conway

Shawn Michaels is guest referee and Conway finds his plight rather funny. Therefore, Shawn jumps him and puts the MAY 19 shirt on him. Cue Kane and the destruction is on in a hurry. Kane hammers away as Shawn chills on the middle rope. Conway tries to escape over the barricade and is quickly pulled back by the somewhat partial referee. Shawn grabs a trashcan and just happens to look away when Kane hits Conway in the head. There’s the chokeslam and Kane leaves, only to have Shawn grab a mic and say May 19 a few times. That’s enough for Kane to comeback for a Tombstone to complete the destruction. This was funny.

Umaga vs. Rory Fox

Umaga smashes the guy and finishes with the usual in a hurry.

Candice Michelle is glad that Vince has healed his cold and asks for help with, and I quote, her labiagitis. A very banged up HHH comes in to interrupt and Vince offers him the special guest referee spot in the main event. That doesn’t quite work as HHH should just get the title shot but Vince isn’t sure. HHH sees it as punishment but if Kenny wins the title, he wants the first shot. Otherwise, HHH might not do it. Vince highly suggests that HHH be referee tonight because Vince remembers HHH calling him an old man. If HHH doesn’t do it, he won’t get another title shot until he’s an old man.

It’s time for the Cutting Edge, with Edge not being happy because he wasn’t pinned last night. Therefore, he still has a claim to the WWE Title. He’s used to it though, because his Wrestlemania match was ruined too. Yes he stole the show, but it was called by some ECW reject. Edge: “OH MY GOD Joey you suck.” With that out of the way, here’s Mick Foley as this week’s guest. Foley says he remembers the Wrestlemania match too and has spent the last month trying to find out what went wrong.

The more he watches it though, the more he realizes that nothing was wrong. He was more violent than ever and he was part of maybe the greatest hardcore match in wrestling history. On that one night, he was face to face with the toughest man in the WWE. Foley shakes his hand and the fans are really unsure about this one. Even though he lost the match, he got the defining Wrestlemania moment, just like Edge said he would. We see the end of the match with Edge looking traumatized after the spear into the flaming table. Foley: “THERE IT IS!”

Foley saw the look in Edge’s eyes, knowing that it was all downhill for him. Now Foley wants to go through this again right here tonight. Edge says he’s overcoming strep throat….but Foley is on. (Joey: “NEXT WEEK!”) He’s on crack that is because that isn’t happening. Just out of principle though, Edge will face Foley in any match he wants next week. Foley thinks the name Cutting Edge is appropriate, because next week, he’ll be cutting Edge with anything he can find. Save up that throat so you can scream for mercy. Oh and try to have a nice day. There was something odd about this and I think that’s the point.

Video on Backlash.

Here’s Chris Masters to say that last night’s loss to Carlito was a fluke. If Carlito tries that again, he’ll be spitting teeth instead of apples. Moving on though, Rob Van Dam may have won the Intercontinental Title but he can’t break the Masterlock. Cue Van Dam to take the challenge but here’s Shelton Benjamin to jump Van Dam as the hold goes on. Carlito runs in for the save with a chair so here’s Nicky to cheer a tag announcement.

Carlito/Rob Van Dam vs. Shelton Benjamin/Chris Masters

Joined in progress with Masters holding a chinlock and we cut to Vince and Candice canoodling. Back with Shelton holding his own chinlock as Joey has received a note at ringside. The Spirit Squad wants to see him in the back right now as Shelton gets two. So Lawler is on his own on commentary as Rob scores with a spinwheel kick on Masters.

The hot tag brings in Carlito as Lawler is actually managing to do play by play. Masters decks Carlito from behind and Shelton adds a kick to the head. Van Dam comes in with the top rope kick to the face and Carlito Backstabs Masters. A rollup with trunks gives Carlito the pin on Shelton.

Rating: C-. They got some action into a pretty short match, though I’m almost scared to see where the Styles deal is going. What we got was good enough and the Intercontinental Title picture is starting to get interesting. Van Dam tends to be the placeholder champion more than anything else so I’m not sure where this is going, but it could work well.

Smackdown Rebound.

The Spirit Squad shoves Joey onto a couch and says they want to hear more spirit from him. Otherwise, they’ll have Vince make him wear a cheerleader outfit for commentary next week. They want extra spirit when he announces that Kenny is the new WWE Champion.

Post break Joey returns to commentary and Lawler calls him a cheerleader. Lawler wants to hear the Kenny line but Joey doesn’t want to do this. ECW is mentioned, and Joey says if this was ECW, he wouldn’t be working with a hack like Lawler. Joey takes off his glasses and slaps Lawler, who calls him a little idiot and shoves him down. Styles walks off and then runs to the back. Well that made the show better. Joey being gone, not the angle.

Post another break, Lawler apologizes and asks Joey to come back out here and finish the show. Joey, sans glasses, comes out to the stage and says he isn’t coming back. Thanks to the magic of live TV, he is going to show the world why he was the uncensored loose cannon of commentary for seven years in ECW. Six months ago, WWE called him because they had humiliated and fired JR again.

From week one, he has gotten an ongoing lecture between wrestling and sports entertainment. He can’t say things like wrestler or wrestling because it’s sports entertainment with superstars. Styles is supposed to ignore the moves and holds to tell stories. Well that’s insulting to wrestlers who leave their families to ply their craft in that ring. That’s why he was pulled from Wrestlemania because he doesn’t sound like Jim Ross. Then he gets bumped from BACKLASH? He called live pay per views in ECW because he was good enough to do it on his own.

Joey is sick of sports entertainment and storytelling and bathroom humor. He’s also sick of Vince McMahon mocking God and making out with the Divas for his own amusement. Finally he’s sick of the fans who buy this garbage. He never needed this job or wanted this job so he quits. Lawler isn’t impressed and seems to be finishing on his own.

It was a nice speech, but at the end of the day, Joey is hardly some saint of commentary and I’ll be glad to have JR back. Yeah Joey can call a lot of moves. That would make him a heck of a radio announcer, but when I can see all of the moves as they happen, I don’t need to have someone calling every single one of them. That being said, a lot of the other things that he said was rather accurate, though there is no reason to believe that this is going to be some big game changer.

Todd Grisham joins commentary.

Raw World Title: Kenny vs. John Cena

Cena is defending, HHH is guest referee and the rest of the Spirit Squad is here. Cena isn’t looking thrilled here but he hammers Kenny into the ring and hits a delayed vertical suplex. The FU is loaded up but HHH punches him in the face (I can go with not wasting time with being subtle) and the Squad piles onto him outside. Back in and Kenny hammers on the wounded head from last night.

Cena is sent outside for another group beatdown, including a whip into the steps. That’s good for two, as is a jumping elbow to the face. Kenny does a You Can’t See Me neckbreaker, causing HHH to rather halfheartedly go does to cover again. That’s enough for Kenny, who shoves HHH and gets punched down. There’s the Pedigree and HHH tells the Spirit Squad to bring it.

They only get on the apron and that’s enough for HHH, who walks off. Cue Shawn Michaels in his own referee shirt but first he has to have the big dramatic staredown with HHH. Kenny hits the top rope legdrop so Shawn comes in to count two before stopping. Sweet Chin Music drops Kenny and it’s Cena and Shawn beating up the Squad. Shawn superkicks Mikey and feigns sleepwalking, leaving Cena to FU Kenny to retain.

Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here as this was a pretty easy way to end the show. There was no chance that Kenny was winning but they didn’t really waste time teasing that he would. The Shawn/HHH/Cena stuff is interesting as they’re swapping Shawn into Edge’s spot (yeah I’m stunned too) but at least we got something pretty fast paced which didn’t waste time before getting to the obvious finish.

Post match Shawn and Cena shake hands with Shawn throwing him the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was definitely the night off show after last night’s pay per view, but they set some stuff up for later. The part that worries me is setting up Joey Styles as the big angle, even if it isn’t going to be some top story. Angles involving people like commentators or referees rarely work because they aren’t the important parts of the show, but if it gets JR back, I’ll take it. Other than that, the show was a lot of short matches, though they should set up some important stuff later.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Backlash 2006
Date: April 30, 2006
Location: Rupp Arena, Lexington, Kentucky
Attendance: 14,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a very special show for me as I was in the audience live. It was the first pay per view I ever got to attend live and the only one I would see in person for about fourteen years. We have a two match show here with John Cena defending the World Title against HHH and Edge in a triple threat, plus Shawn Michaels/God vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon in a match that can’t possibly take place without a lot of cringing. Let’s get to it.

For a bonus, here’s the pre-show match from Sunday Night Heat.

Rob Conway vs. Goldust

Goldust does his crouch to start and the fans certainly seem to approve. A knee to the ribs sets up a running hip attack, which commentary finds hilarious. Conway’s clothesline gets two and we hit the chinlock. Back up and simultaneous crossbodies put both guys down for a bit and it’s time to slug it out. A neckbreaker gives Conway two but Goldust is back with some right hands. The chest rub right hands in the corner have Conway in more trouble and it’s the scoop powerslam to give Goldust the pin.

Rating: C-. The action wasn’t the point here and there is nothing wrong with that. They did what they were supposed to do by getting the crowd warmed up with some people they would have recognized (Conway was an OVW legend and the TV show aired in Lexington). Throw in Conway’s completely obnoxious music and it was easy to cheer for Goldust to beat him.

The opening video focuses on Vince McMahon’s war against Shawn Michaels, including the always awesome visual of Vince’s bloody smile from ringside at Wrestlemania XIX. The triple threat gets some attention as well, as they are the only two matches that matter.

At least they aren’t using the still wrong line of Rupp Arena being on the campus of the University of Kentucky.

Carlito vs. Chris Masters

Carlito slaps him in the face to start and gets choked with his own shirt as a result. A basement dropkick into a running faceplant gives Carlito two but Masters is back with a backdrop. Carlito slips out of a gorilla press and tries his own full nelson, which is broken up in a hurry. They head outside with Carlito hitting a dive and then hammering away back inside. That earns him a buckle bomb as the fans think that Masters suck, allowing JR to get in some always well deserved jabs at the University of Louisville.

We hit the neck crank for a bit, followed by an elbow to Carlito’s jaw and then into another neck crank. The comeback is cut off by a clothesline but Carlito slips out of the Masterlock attempt. A springboard elbow drops Masters and Carlito throws an apple at him for a distraction. Masters sends him into the corner again but the belly to back superplex is broken up. Carlito’s moonsault press gets two and he sends Masters into the corner. The Backstabber finishes Masters.

Rating: C+. Pretty much an above average Raw match here and that’s not the worst way to open a B pay per view. Masters even had a logical offense by softening up the neck while Carlito used the high flying to fight against the power game. It’s a good enough match and that’s all it needed to be in this spot.

Maria throws us to some fans giving their predictions earlier today. Lita comes in and says no one cares what Roscoe P. Coltrane thinks about the match (because Kentucky is full of country bumpk….carry on) and she is tired of keeping her mouth shut. Maria has heard otherwise about Lita’s mouth, so Lita offers to knock her out. Edge is winning tonight and they’ll have a private celebration because unlike these people, she actually gets some.

Ric Flair vs. Umaga

Armando Alejandro Estrada handles Umaga’s introduction. Flair jumps Umaga on the floor to start but gets taken into the corner for the right hands. A quick referee distraction lets Flair get in a low blow and then does it again for a bonus. Umaga doesn’t seem to mind and hits him in the throat for a knockdown.

Flair rolls to the floor and hits some rather hard chops before avoiding a charge into the post. Back in and Flair starts taking out the knee but it’s way too early for the Figure Four. The Tree of Woe headbutt sets up the running hip attack in the corner and Flair is in big trouble. Umaga’s middle rope headbutt sets up the Samoan Spike for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. This was almost a squash and that’s all it needed to be. The important thing here about Flair is that he knew he could pop right back up like it was nothing because he had been a made man for about fifteen years. That means he can put someone like Umaga over and have no real damage whatsoever, which is a rather valuable lesson to know.

Vince McMahon is flexing in the back when Shane McMahon comes in to say it isn’t a handicap match tonight. Shane needs to leave God to Vince because Vince can do anything God can. To demonstrate, Vince pours water on the floor and walks on it, then pulls out a fish and some bread. He doesn’t quite know the story but he looks to the ceiling and someone off screen throws in a bunch of fish. Vince sees this as a sign because it’s HOLY MACKEREL. Vince leaves and Shane drinks some water, which now looks a lot more purple. Shane: “Uh, dad?”

We recap Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James for Mickie’s Women’s Title. Mickie was obsessed with Trish and stalked her for months before winning the Women’s Title at Wrestlemania. Trish responded by dressing like Mickie and playing her own minds games. It’s time for the big rematch.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

Mickie is challenging and they’re dressed as themselves. Trish shrugs off a wristlock to start and busts out the Matrish into a headscissors. A kick to the head sends Mickie outside for the Thesz press off the apron into some right hands. Back in and Mickie hammers away in the corner but Trish gets sent over the top and out to the floor… and that’s a dislocated shoulder. Back in and Mickie hammers away, followed by some choking for the VERY sudden DQ. I’m not going to rate it as they had barely gotten started when the shoulder went out but it was looking good early on. Trish would be out for nearly two months.

Shawn Michaels says God is with him as he always is. Tonight is a handicap match though and the McMahons are being brought down to their knees again.

Intercontinental Title/Money In The Bank Briefcase: Shelton Benjamin vs. Rob Van Dam

Shelton’s title and Rob’s briefcase are both on the line and it’s winner take all. Commentary starts talking about the missing Mama Benjamin plus the time where Vince McMahon performed surgery on JR. Ross: “What great programming that was.” Shelton bounces around and armdrags Rob over, leaving Rob with a “so that’s how it is” look on his face. Rob’s rollup sets up his own armdrags and the threat of a spinning kick to the face sends Shelton bailing to the corner.

The fans want Mama (I was disappointed too) as Rob knocks him outside but Shelton comes back in with a knee to the face. Rob hits a spinwheel kick into some clotheslines so Shelton goes outside again. That means a slingshot dive but Shelton catches him on the way back in. A big running sunset bomb to the floor (THUD) drops Rob hard and we hit the chinlock back inside. Shelton grabs a backbreaker into another chinlock, followed by the reverse chinlock to mix it up a bit.

Some slams stay on the back and there’s another chinlock. It’s too early for the exploder, but Shelton reverses Rolling Thunder into a Samoan drop for two. The Five Star is broken up so it’s off to another chinlock (I think we get the point). Rob fights up with some kicks to the face and now Rolling Thunder connects for two more. There’s a split legged moonsault for another near fall but the Five Star misses as well.

Shelton hits a hard DDT for his own two so he grabs the briefcase, which draws Rob outside. A kick to the head cuts Rob off but he’s right back in with a hurricanrana. Rob gets shoved into the referee so Shelton grabs the briefcase. Van Dam takes it away though and it’s a Van Daminator into the Five Star to give Rob the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. The chinlocks got a bit annoying here but the result worked well. I liked the winner takes all deal as I couldn’t imagine Van Dam losing the briefcase so adding the potential that he could win the title helped boost things up a bit. Van Dam is getting some momentum built up at the moment and if they have him cash in a little faster than Edge, it could make for a heck of a title showdown.

We recap Kane vs. Big Show. They had been dominant Tag Team Champions but then lost them to the Spirit Squad. Soon thereafter, Kane became obsessed with anyone mentioning May 19 and eventually snapped when Big Show said it. Kane went for Show’s eye and drew a lot of blood, setting up this match so Show can try to beat some sense into him.

Big Show talks about how May 19 is the release date of Kane’s movie. So Kane has problems. So what? Big Show was in Waterboy but you didn’t see him running around beating people up. Show doesn’t know if Kane’s goldfish died or what, but tonight it’s eye for an eye.

Kane vs. Big Show

Kane jumps him at the bell so Show shoves him down to take over. They head outside for a second with Kane knocking him into the post on the way back in. A running corner clothesline rocks Show again and a regular version gets two. The armbar goes on for a bit and Kane hits him in the arm to break up a chokeslam attempt. Kane goes up for the top rope clothesline but gets caught in a fall away slam. The chokeslam is loaded up but Kane reverses into a pretty messy DDT (the camera work didn’t help things) for two.

Show knocks him down again and drops the leg for two as JR mentions that this hasn’t been the prettiest match. Show powerslams him down for two more but Kane big boots him to the floor. Then we get the red lights and Kane’s voice comes over the loudspeaker. He keeps saying May 19 and taunts Kane about not being able to control it. Kane keeps grabbing his head as the voice talks about how he knows what happened. Show grabs a chair and hits him in the head so he can walk away for the no contest.

Rating: D. It was a bad match until the ending and then it got even worse. This was a lot of the same plodding match you’ve seen these two have a dozen times before and it wasn’t any better this time around. Kane going insane to promote his movie wasn’t exactly groundbreaking stuff. It was entertaining breaking stuff though and that’s a pretty bad way to end a pay per view match, especially after such a blatant advertising campaign to promote the match.

Post match the lights are normal and the voice stops as Kane sits up and smiles.

Candice Michelle is coughing in Vince’s office because she has a chest cold. She wants Vince to give her a healing touch so he winds up on top of her and she screams a lot until Shane comes to get him. And we move on.

We recap Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels/God in a video we’ve seen in one version or another multiple times lately. Shawn told Vince to get over Montreal and grow up already so Vince declared war on him. Then Shawn beat him at Wrestlemania, so Vince said Shawn cheated by having God help him. Hence the tag match.

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels/God

This is going to hurt. Vince introduces the Hipster From Heaven and we get some harp music to go with a spotlight. Hold on though as Vince says that isn’t a WWE entrance so he wants God to get jiggy with it. The dance music is on but Vince tells the referee to check God for weapons. Vince doesn’t care if he has any weapons because it’s going to be a no holds barred match. Thankfully Shawn comes out before this gets even worse (to be fair, I had expected a guy with a big white beard so this could have been worse….maybe).

Before the match, Vince tells Shawn where he and God are going tonight so Shawn hits him in the face to start fast. Shawn sends Shane to the floor for the slingshot dive and beats him up the ramp to make it one on one. Shane slugs away on the ramp but gets backdropped onto the stage. Vince joins them but Shane gets sent into the big set. A crossbody drives Vince off the stage and through a table for the big crash. Shawn goes up the steps but gets blasted in the face by a Shane chair shot.

That’s enough to draw some blood, with JR proving he doesn’t understand the word literally by saying it’s “literally ear to ear”. They head back to ringside with Shawn going into the post and then the barricade, followed by a spinning DDT back inside. Now Vince is willing to make a tag, even though Vince needing a tag in a No Holds Barred match doesn’t make much sense for him. Shane throws Vince a trashcan for a shot to the head and it’s time for Vince to grab a mic.

Vince wants to know why God is walking out on the match, even declaring that God has left the building. Vince: “God has left the building!” In one of those visuals that is hard to fathom, Vince tries his own superkick but Shawn knocks it away and hits the running forearm. There’s the nip up and Shane accidentally caves Vince’s head in with a chair. Shawn knocks Shane down and hits the top rope elbow and JR is knocking the nicknames and monikers out as fast as he can.

There’s the superkick to Shane but Shawn would rather grab a pair of tables. Both McMahons are put on the tables and the fans want ladders. Shawn gives them what they want with the huge ladder but here’s the Spirit Squad so he has to dive on them instead. The Squad gets back up and jumps Shawn though, meaning the beatdown is on in a hurry. They move the tables and take the ladder down, meaning it’s a big Uppsa Daisy through the table to give the rather evil looking Vince the pin. JR: “That’s bull****!” Lawler: “It’s the father, the son and the holy Spirit Squad.” Eh point for a good line.

Rating: B-. This was about as logical as you could get, especially if they insist on keeping the feud going. At the end of the day, Shawn was probably on equal footing here at best after he beat the fire out of Vince at Wrestlemania, so stacking the deck was the only way to give it some drama. Shawn is going to need some help though and those crotch chops should give you a hint of where it’s going. This also flew by, which shows you how well they could play the smoke and mirrors given the almost twenty minutes that they had. The God stuff is going to offend some people (fair) but Vince being over the top is always worth a look.

Post match the Squad carries Vince and Shane out on their shoulders.

John Cena talks about how controversial he is and how there are different groups who want to see the three of them all come out as WWE Champion. There will be one voice at the end of the match though and that will be….Lilian Garcia, who will announce that Cena is still WWE Champion.

Here’s Matt Striker for Striker’s Classroom. Striker says he was not originally scheduled to be here (I wonder if he is filling in time after Trish got hut) but now we are seeing a miracle: an educated man in Kentucky! He lists off some things Kentucky is famous for, which does not include being well educated. Striker is here to be your teacher though and is here with one of the most educated people in the history of Kentucky.

Cue Eugene, which Striker says is proof that you shouldn’t marry your cousin. Striker hands Eugene some chalk and asks him to write his name on the chalk board. The camera goes onto Striker and we come back with a message on the board declaring Striker’s love for a bodily excrement. Striker complains about how the sentence is written as Eugene picks his nose. After ordering Eugene not to eat it, Striker gets Eugene’s nasal contents shoved into his mouth. There’s a Stunner to Striker to wrap things up.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Edge beat John Cena for the title at New Year’s Revolution but then lost it back at the Royal Rumble. Cena went on to defeat HHH at Wrestlemania, where Edge also stole the show against Mick Foley. Both Edge and Foley want title shots so let’s have a triple threat.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge vs. HHH

Cena is defending and Lita is here with Edge. With Edge heading outside to start, Cena and HHH slug it out with Cena getting the better of things. The release fisherman’s suplex gets two on HHH with Edge making the save and bailing straight back to the floor. HHH hits the jumping knee to the face for two and the slugout (with BOO/YAY crowd reactions) is back on. Edge gets up on the apron so the two of them bring him back in to keep the beating up. They all head outside when HHH and Cena compete to see who can ram Edge’s head into the announcers’ table harder.

HHH jumps Cena and takes Edge back inside, only to miss a charge in the corner. Cena pulls HHH off the apron though and goes up top for a splash onto Edge for two (that’s a new one). The Shuffle is loaded up but Lita low bridges Cena to the floor. HHH is back in with a facebuster and clothesline to Edge and the spinebuster gets two. Edge is right back with the Edge O Matic for his own near fall but HHH grabs the sleeper. Cena comes back to lift both of them up for the FU at the same time.

Edge slips out and spears Cena down, making him Samoan drop HHH in the process. HHH and Edge head outside with HHH being busted open off a posting. The Edgecution onto the announcers’ table knocks HHH silly, leaving Edge to hit a missile dropkick for two on Cena. Edge gets pulled into the STFU though and it’s HHH grabbing the hand to block the tap. A mic shot to the head knocks Cena silly to break thing sup and HHH CRACKS Edge with a chair to the head.

Back in and Cena grabs the STFU on HHH (note the booing) for two arm drops. HHH grabs the rope but gets pulled right back into the STFU. Edge goes up top so Cena lets go to break it up, with the ref getting bumped in the process. HHH breaks up the super FU with a powerbomb and everyone is down. That means it’s time for Lita to bring in a chair but HHH breaks it up with a spinebuster. The sledgehammer is whipped out but Edge cuts HHH down wit the spear. HHH hits Cena low to break up the FU, only to have Cena counter the Pedigree into a jackknife rollup to pin HHH and retain.

Rating: A. Oh yeah this was great and one of the more action packed main events you’ll see from around this time. They were all fired up and hitting on every level, with Cena getting the surprise win to wrap it up. It’s also WAY better on the broadcast than it was live, as you couldn’t get a good feeling for the level of blood and carnage. Great stuff here and worth seeing for sure.

Post match HHH sledgehammers both of them down and holds up the sledgehammer. One more crotch chop ends the show.

Overall Rating: B+. There might be some nostalgia on this one but dang it was a fun show to watch back. Of course there were bad moments but it was a two match show and the two matches delivered. I’m not sure what else you could ask for out of a B pay per view and they threw in a pretty good opener and a better Intercontinental Title match. This worked really well, but there was one problem.

Kentucky is one of those states with a rather ridiculous athletic commission (partially because of the deathmatch nonsense out of IWA-MS and it’s horrible boss who caused a lot of trouble) which REALLY didn’t like the blood, meaning WWE got about $50,000 in fines for the show (including things like Cena and Edge (yes Cena and Edge) not stopping the match when HHH bladed). Throw in that, depending on which reports you believe, HHH actually bled onto the commission’s representative and it should be no surprise that WWE was banned from holding televised events (if not events in general) in Kentucky for three years.

The commission has since been toned WAY down and now WWE is here at least once or twice a year for TV, but it was a rather long wait because of this show. Other than that though, it was a pretty good night all around and quite a nice memory for me that I’m never going to forget.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 28, 2006
Location: Wembley Arena, London, England
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s time for a huge main event in 2/3 of a Wrestlemania rematch. This time around we have Rey Mysterio defending the World Title against Kurt Angle, with JBL waiting on the winner. Other than that it’s time to continue the King of the Ring as we continue the lull before the next Smackdown only pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video is about Mysterio vs. Angle. Does it need to be anything else?

Opening sequence.

Here’s JBL, in a Rolls Royce, for a US Title defense and a chat. And yes he has an American flag in hand and an American flag jacket. Before the match, JBL brags about America and how much England needs them. If British Prime Minister Tony Blair is George W. Bush’s poodle, then every British person is America’s stepchild.

Therefore, tonight JBL is throwing them a bone by giving an Englishman a US Title shot. How tough can the challenger be though? After all, the British follow a queen, which has JBL on his knees in laughter. The fans chant for ENGLAND but JBL says an American is talking. He wants everyone to salute his jacket but his opponent cuts him off.

US Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. William Regal

Regal, in regular gear this week, is challenging and promises to show JBL what British people think of Americans. The beating is on in a hurry with Regal choking JBL with the jacket and firing off some shots to the face. The fans are all behind Regal and an uppercut puts JBL on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Regal kneeing away but getting punched in the face to cut things off. Regal is bleeding from the ear so JBL goes after it, followed by a sleeper. A belly to back gets Regal out of trouble but JBL kicks him in the face. JBL’s swinging neckbreaker and DDT combine for two but Regal is back with an exploder suplex for a heck of a reaction. Regal grabs the Regal Stretch but JBL gets two fingers on the rope. JBL goes more villain with a thumb to the eye and the Clothesline From JBL retains the title.

Rating: C+. This was a nice match as they didn’t bother with anything tricky and just had two guys hit each other for ten minutes. Regal fighting for his country and getting the huge face pops made for some weird visuals (not in a bad way) and it wouldn’t have been completely insane to see a fluke title change. You could tell Regal was fired up here and it helped a lot.

JBL’s goofy grin while he hugs the title makes it that much better.

Booker T. and Sharmell are ready for Booker’s match with Kurt Angle in the King of the Ring but he doesn’t like being asked about Angle vs. Mysterio. Gunner Scott comes in to remind Booker of the upset win a few weeks ago. Booker agrees to face Scott again….but not tonight because Booker has a chest cold and a sinus infection. He’ll find Scott an opponent who can sop him up like a biscuit.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt beats Rock to win his first WWF Title at No Mercy 2000.

Video on Tatanka’s path to become the new warrior of his Native American tribe. I can appreciate trying to make something out of someone, but Tatanka in 2006 wasn’t going to be the answer, especially with something like this.

MNM/Gregory Helms vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick/Super Crazy

It’s a brawl to start with the villains being sent outside for the big triple dive. Kendrick gets shoved off the top back inside though and Mercury takes over with some quick near falls. A backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gets two and Nitro adds his breakdancing legdrop for the same. Helms grabs the quickly broken abdominal stretch and Kendrick gets over for the hot tag to London. Everything breaks down and London rolls Helms up for the pin. Melina is stunned, though that might be due to Tony Chimmel using the high pitched SUPER for Super Crazy.

Rating: C. They got a lot of stuff into a sub four minute match and that’s perfectly fine. I’m not sure if Crazy is supposed to be the next challenger for Helms or if he was just someone put out there to fill in a spot, but this was all about MNM vs. London and Kendrick anyway. They kept this short and got to the point, which is all they needed to do.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Angle beats Austin at Unforgiven 2001.

Melina yells at MNM for losing and insults Jillian Hall for getting fired last week. She offers Hall a job doing her makeup and throws said makeup on her. The catfight is on with makeup being used in various ways.

Bobby Lashley wants to be King of the Ring because of what it has meant for everyone else. He really doesn’t need to be talking.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt beats Big Show at Armageddon 2004.

King of the Ring First Round: Mark Henry vs. Bobby Lashley

Henry shoves him around a few times to start and Lashley isn’t sure about this one. A headbutt puts Lashley down again and there’s a hard whip into the corner. Henry cuts off the comeback with a rather hard clothesline, with Cole telling us to go outside and run into our house to see what that feels like. Hopefully no one with a house boat follows that advice.

A backbreaker plants Lashley again but Henry misses a charge allowing the comeback to start. Lashley hits the clotheslines and the impressive slam but Henry powers out of the Dominator. Henry misses a charge and gets low bridged over the ropes to the floor, giving Lashley the countout win.

Rating: C-. That’s about as smart of a way to do this as they could have had, even if it looked like Henry slipped on a banana peel to end things. Henry is still a monster who shouldn’t be losing very often, so aside from not having him in the tournament, the only way to go was a countout or DQ. Lashley was thrown around a bit, but that slam felt like a pretty impressive moment.

Post match Henry beats Lashley up some more, including a splash against the post to bang up his ribs.

Rey Mysterio is asked about always being seen as an underdog. Tonight he is the underdog again but he knows he has to stay away from the ankle lock. He’ll give it his best but if he loses, it was well worth it. This has been the latest moment of WWE making sure you know Rey is in way over his head.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt beats Brock Lesnar and the Big Show to win the title at Vengeance 2003.

Booker T., complete with chest cold, is here with Sharmell to announce Gunner Scott’s opponent. After using some medicine, here we go.

Finlay vs. Gunner Scott

Booker and Sharmell sit in on commentary. Finlay headlocks him down to start and pulls on the arms with his boot on Gunner’s head. Back up and Gunner hits a dropkick tot he floor but the baseball slide gets caught in the ring skirt so the beating can be on. Scott fights back and hits an elbow to the face, followed by a belly to belly for two. They fight outside where Booker gets in a cheap shot, allowing Finlay to hit the Air Raid Crash for the pin.

Rating: D+. Scott feels like their latest attempt to make someone out of nothing and it’s too early to know if that is going to be a success. Booker having another injury/condition to keep him out of the ring is a bit of a stretch after he was just injured for so long, but his talking is making up for it. On top of that, it’s nice to see Finlay being featured again as he’s doing well in his role as the tough villain.

Post match the beatdown is on until Chris Benoit runs in for the save.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari for a chat. Daivari says that is it true: Great Khali has dominated the Undertaker and destroyed his spirit. Undertaker is afraid of Khali, who yells a lot to emphasize his point. Krystal runs away to wrap things up.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt wins a battle royal to become champion again.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is defending and commentary makes it clear that he is the underdog. Again. Angle drops to a knee as Rey circles him, meaning it’s an early takedown to put the champ down. An uppercut cuts Rey down again but he’s back up with right hands in the corner. That just earns Rey a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and a regular version gets two. Rey charges into a belly to belly to the floor and we take an early break.

Back with Rey caught in a chinlock with a bodyscissors. That’s broken up so Rey has to escape the Angle Slam and kick Angle in the head for a double knockdown. The 619 is blocked so Rey is right back with a sitout bulldog for two, allowing Cole to call Rey the underdog again. Another Angle Slam is countered into a DDT for two more but Angle runs the corner for a superplex.

Back up and Angle misses a charge hard into the post and falls out to the floor. That means Rey can hit a top rope Fameasser on the way back in for another near fall, but Angle flips him over with a release German suplex. The Angle Slam is countered for a third time and the 619 connects this time. Angle counters the West Coast Pop into the ankle lock but here’s Mark Henry to jump Angle for the DQ.

Rating: B-. They were having a good match and I can live with the DQ ending, but man alive this “Rey is such an underdog” is getting old in a hurry. What makes it even worse is that it comes after the last three months being about Eddie Guerrero, making Rey feel like a high school student who is in over his head in a bad 90s action comedy. Rey is an underdog, but there’s a difference between someone Barry Horowitz’s 1995 winning streak and one of the best cruiserweights of all time. As usual, WWE needs to lighten up on beating us over the head and I don’t think they’ll get that.

Post match Henry crushes Angle against the post and puts him on a table. The running splash from the apron destroys Kurt to end the show as Rey, again, is forgotten.

Overall Rating: C. As usual, the British shows are always a little off but there was only so much they could do without having anything to build towards at the moment. The next pay per view will start to come into focus soon and Angle vs. Mysterio did feel big, but they didn’t help themselves with making Rey seem like a loser who has gotten lucky. The show did go by very quickly though and nothing was bad, so it was hardly a difficult sit. Just get them something to focus on and we can move on to something a little better.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 24, 2006
Location: Wembley Arena, London, England
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

We’re overseas for a taped show this week as it’s the go home show for Backlash. With all of the handicap matches for the main event exhausted, I’m not sure what we’re going to be seeing here. Aside from a red phone booth and whatever else WWE associates with England of course. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon, mainly focusing on their Wrestlemania match and the ensuing fallout.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and Lita to get things going. Edge talks about being in a triple threat match at Backlash and one of the men he is facing is HHH. We see Edge pinning HHH last week in the handicap match, followed by a clip of Edge pinning John Cena at New Year’s Revolution. This should be simple enough for even the British fans to figure out: Edge is going to be leaving Backlash as WWE Champion.

That was rather impressive, but HHH was only focusing on sending Cena a message. On Sunday, he is focusing on the title and he will go through either of them to get back on the throne. Edge is sick of hearing about the eleventh title reign but wants to know why HHH is in the triple threat. He lost at Wrestlemania and has never beaten Edge, so Edge suggests that HHH likes to get on his knees in front of Vince.

That gives us the most obvious Lita joke of the year but HHH says he’ll bash Vince McMahon or his own grandmother in the head to be champion (dang Randy Orton stole that line from him all those years later). Cue John Cena to go after HHH as Edge and Lita bail. HHH is ready to go but here’s the Spirit Squad to interrupt. The let us know, through cheering form, that they will be facing the three of them tonight in a handicap match. HHH, Cena and Edge aren’t exactly thrilled.

Chris Masters/Matt Striker/Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito/Charlie Haas/Rob Van Dam

Carlito and Benjamin start things off but it’s quickly off to Van Dam, who gets pounded down in the corner. Van Dam kicks him out to the floor and the villains are cleared out in a hurry. Rob hits a big dive and we take an early break. Back with Van Dam in trouble as Masters pulls him off the ropes to set up a bearhug. Shelton comes in for the reverse chinlock as the LET’S GO ROB chant starts up. That sounds so out of place after the RVD chants became so well known.

Vince McMahon calls last week’s “acts of God” a bunch of coincidences and says he has fired the pyrotechnics director. Vince has it on good authority that God is on holiday this week so tonight, Shane McMahon will take care of Shawn Michaels. Shane says he’ll get back at Shawn tonight and he swears to God….pause for a look around….that Shawn will get what’s coming to him.

Coach is in the ring because it’s time for a bikini contest. We have Candice Michelle, Maria, Torrie Wilson and Victoria here and the fans seem to fancy Torrie (as you might have guessed). They disrobe, the fans cheer for Maria, Candice wins anyway. Candice’s prize is the chance to kiss Coach but here’s Viscera to threaten to do, ahem, things, to Coach. Instead he’s taking the prize, meaning he beats up Coach, kisses Candice, and leaves with her.

We see the same video that opened the show.

Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon

Vince is here to handle Shane’s introduction. Shane starts fast and is quickly sent over the top for a big crash. A cheap shot lets Shane get in a few knees and punches to the back before hammering away at the face instead. Shane even shows off a bit with a torture rack neckbreaker for two, only to miss a pretty good looking moonsault. Shawn wins a slugout and hits the forearm into the nip up, followed by the top rope elbow.

Vince breaks up Sweet Chin Music but gets beaten onto the announcers’ table for his efforts. Shane makes the save and helps Vince load up the announcers’ table. A monitor to the head sets up the big elbow through the table and Vince says he told Shawn so. Vince declares God a chicken who will abandon him on Sunday. The match is a no contest of course.

Rating: C. Pretty good for a Shane match as he just does his spots and doesn’t try to have anything resembling a traditional match. That’s all he should do and it worked out well enough. It wasn’t exactly good but Shawn can work with anyone and helped Shane through things here. They weren’t out there very long either and that helped hide a lot of the weaknesses.

We look back at Kane attacking Big Show.

We look at See No Evil, of course edited off the Network.

Backlash rundown.

Edge comes in to see Cena because they have to work together. Cena says Edge is a snake and if he tries anything, he’s going down quicker than Lita.

Post break, Edge and Lita seem to be scheming.

Umaga vs. Steve Lewington

Lewington would wind up having a cup of coffee on ECW as DJ Gabriel. Umaga wastes no time in kicking him to the floor before swinging Lewington into the steps. Back in and the running Tree of Woe headbutt sets up the running hip attack in the corner. The thumb to Lewington’s throat is good for the pin.

Post match here’s Umaga to slug away at Umaga, including a testicular claw before a right hand puts Umaga on the floor.

Lita comes up to see HHH and says she has smoothed it over with Cena. HHH hopes she’s still nice after he beats Edge on Sunday. Lita says if he does, she can hit him with his sledgehammer. She leaves, but HHH was hoping for advice on how to take on five guys at once. Dang some of these lines are brutal.

Flair vs. Umaga is set for Backlash.

Here’s Mickie James, dressed like herself and coming out to her own music. She’ll admit it: she got a little carried away after winning the Women’s Title. Yeah she dressed up like Trish and dyed her hair but now she knows who she is. She’s ready to beat Trish again on Sunday, but here is Trish in the full Mickie impression again. Trish keeps cutting her off and saying the same things Mickie is saying, setting up the fight. The Chick Kick sends Mickie out to the floor.

Edge/HHH/John Cena vs. Spirit Squad

HHH takes over on Mikey but Cena slaps his way in as well, much to HHH’s annoyance. Mikey uses a trampoline to springboard up and get in a shot on Cena, allowing Johnny to hit a spinning kick to Cena’s head. Cena is sent outside for the big group beatdown and it’s an assisted moonsault to give Mikey two back inside. Mikey grabs a chinlock before it’s off to Mitch for a flipping neckbreaker. After a rather odd crawl over to the ropes, Mitch brings Johnny back in to get punched in the face over and over.

Johnny takes Cena down again though and it’s back to Mikey, who gets powerslammed. Cena manages to beat up the Squad for just a bit before it’s HHH tagging himself back in to clean house. Kenny breaks up the Pedigree as everything breaks down. The FU to Johnny and the Pedigree to Mikey connect at the same time as Edge and Lita walk out. Cena and HHH slug it out as the match and show end.

Rating: D+. This was another example of a match that was there to advance a story with some wrestling going on at the same time. The biggest problem with the Spirit Squad (ok the second biggest) was on display here: other than Kenny, none of them stand out in any way and they’re just a bunch of pests who can beat people up because of their numbers advantage. That’s fine if you’re a little more intimidating, but a bunch of annoying guys beating people up is kind of a weird combination. And the whole cheerleaders thing makes it even worse.

Overall Rating: C-. These British shows are always a little off and this one did nothing to hide the fact that we are coming up on a two match show this Sunday. The triple threat is looking good and they have done a nice job of making you believe that anyone could win. The McMahons vs. Michaels stuff though is one of those things that is feeling very stupid in a hurry and that could make for a long, long Sunday. Still though, this is a formula that worked well enough on a larger scale at Wrestlemania so maybe it can work out here too.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 21, 2006
Location: Savvis Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 16,108
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

The King of the Ring is still rolling after last week’s opener, meaning we could be in for some good stuff going forward. Smackdown seems to be throwing out a bunch of more gimmicky stuff at the moment and I’m curious to see what else they have. There is something fun about seeing these characters that you might remember from years gone by making their debuts and we should be in for some bigger names and moments. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Booker T. and Sharmell are ready to win the tournament and Matt Hardy is up first.

Matt Hardy talks about everything he has gone through this year and will not die.

King of the Ring First Round: Booker T. vs. Matt Hardy

Sharmell is here with Booker. Feeling out process to start with Booker elbowing his way out of a hammerlock. Hardy is back with a running clothesline for two and we hit the headlock on the mat. That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex and some knees to the ribs have Matt in trouble as they seem to have a long time to use here. Matt is back with a swinging neckbreaker but the moonsault press misses.

We hit the chinlock but Matt is out in a hurry with the middle rope elbow to the back of the head. The comeback is cut off by Sharmell low bridging Hardy to the floor as we take a break. Back with Booker snapping off some suplexes for two but he takes too long going up and gets superplexed back down.

Matt still can’t get anything going as Booker kicks him down and grabs the chinlock again. Another comeback includes elbows and clotheslines for two but Booker kicks him in the face for two more. The Book End lets Booker hit the Spinarooni but the ax kick misses. Matt grabs the Side Effect for two but Sharmell offers a distraction so Booker can hit a low blow. Now the ax kick can finish Matt.

Rating: B-. This was better than I would have expected as they were hitting some big stuff and the fans were into what they were doing. It says a lot when I was a little surprised at some kickouts when I already knew who was winning here. Good match and one of Matt’s best in a long time now.

Post match Booker puts on the crown and does a Karate Kid pose.

In honor of JBL’s Championship Celebration tonight, here’s a look at JBL beating Eddie Guerrero for the World Title.

William Regal is in drag again and Paul Burchill thinks it’s hilarious. Tonight, they’re in a tag match but Regal doesn’t know about this because his chest is a bit too big. Burchill has a teddy bear costume for him but that’s too much for Regal. The shenanigans continue.

Joey Mercury vs. Paul London

Johnny Nitro, Melina and Brian Kendrick are here too. London hurricanranas him down to start and hammers away but a Nitro distraction lets Mercury shove him off the top. Back in and we hit the choking on the ropes. The waistlock goes on, followed by a northern lights suplex for two on London. Kendrick and Melina get up on the apron with Kendrick being knocked down, allowing Nitro to get in a slingshot elbow/backbreaker combination.

Rating: C. This wasn’t the most exciting thing in the world as it was fairly obvious where they were going the second last week’s match was announced. It’s an idea that WWE has used for years and while it works well enough, it isn’t exactly something that is going to draw in my interest.

Regal is now a bear, with Burchill adding a head, including lipstick. And yes it has a tail.

Last week, Kurt Angle snapped Randy Orton’s ankle. That’s how you write Orton off for a suspension due to “unprofessional conduct”.

Chris Benoit/Bobby Lashley vs. Finlay/Orlando Jordan

Lashley and Jordan start things off with Lashley driving him into the corner without much effort. Benoit comes in and tries the Crossface, sending Jordan scampering away. A Finlay distraction lets Jordan take him down by the arm. It’s off to Finlay to crank on said arm, plus drive some elbows down for a bonus.

Benoit’s arm goes into the post and it’s back to Jordan to pound on the arm some more. Benoit finally suplexes his way to freedom and the hot tag brings in Lashley to start cleaning house. The delayed vertical suplex gets two on Jordan and Benoit dives onto Finlay. There’s the spear to Jordan and the Dominator is good for the pin.

Rating: C-. This could have been a lot worse but there is one important detail here: it is the last time Orlando Jordan is going to be wrestling on Smackdown. I have no idea how in the world WWE thought he was going to be some star and thank goodness I’m glad that he is gone for good. He just isn’t that talented as a wrestler so maybe he can be….a guy who makes canned peaches.

Another Great JBL Moment: he throws immigrants across the border.

This Week In WWF History: Steve Austin crushed The Rock’s Lincoln. This was on Raw too.

Teddy Long makes Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio for the World Title next week.

Now Regal is in a chicken costume, with Burchill telling him not to get cocky. There is no tail on this one, but the hole is revealing….uh, yeah.

Funaki isn’t worried about Great Khali, who comes in to shout.

Funaki vs. Great Khali

Chop to the head, big boot and double arm chokeslam in less than a minute.

Now Regal is a gorilla, but Burchill has one more idea and we’ll see it in their match.

William Regal/Paul Burchill vs. Gymini

Simon Dean is here with the Gymini and Regal is….kind of rather British, but has feathers in his hat (which is over a curly black wig). Burchill and Jesse start things off with Burchill hammering away. Jesse gets in a shot of his own though and it’s off to Regal, who gets suplexed out of his wig. The chinlock goes on but Regal fights up and goes for the tag, only to have Burchill walk away. The Cross Trainer (double Regal Cutter) finishes Regal.

Another Great JBL Moment: beating Chris Benoit at Wrestlemania.

Miz tries to get in for the celebration but Palmer Cannon isn’t having that.

Raw Rebound.

We look back at Jillian Hall almost costing JBL the US Title last week.

It’s time for JBL’s Championship Celebration, hosted by Jillian Hall (who walks past the big inflated eagle). She leads out a marching band and here’s JBL in a (horned) Hummer limo as the balloons drop. JBL isn’t pleased though and yells that he is worthy of the New York Philharmonic and Jillian brought him a bunch of refugees from a Big Brother program. JBL: “Never trust a woman to think!” He makes fun of her over inflated balloons and fires her, telling Jillian to go lap dance her heart away.

JBL lists off some great Americans and declares himself an American hero. After all, he’s the real champion over Rey Mysterio. Now he wants the winner of Mysterio vs. Angle next week, so here’s Angle to interrupt. Angle lists off his own American Hero credentials but JBL doesn’t think so. Angle: “Well compared to me, you suck.”

JBL was never as good of a champion as Rey, who finally comes out to interrupt. The fans chant for Eddie and because JBL is a good heel, he points out that Rey can’t even get his own chant. JBL has already taken titles from Eddie Guerrero and Chris Benoit, so Rey can be the third amigo. One short/Spanish joke too many earns JBL a beating and Rey and Angle stare each other down to end the show. JBL is still a heck of a heel, but he’s right in pointing out how little fans seem to care about Rey himself. It doesn’t help that Rey feels like he’s in way over his head as champion too.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a weird one as the ending was a big celebration which only set up a title match between two people who have nothing to do with JBL at the moment. The rest of the show was your usual fare and they did a nice job of making Angle vs. Mysterio feel like an important match. It’s not exactly must see stuff, though they still have a few weeks to set things up before we get to the next pay per view.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6