Monday Night Raw – June 11, 2007 (Mr. McMahon Appreciation Night/2007 Draft): BOOM!

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 11, 2007
Location: Wachovia Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles

It’s time for a special three hour edition (like that has a future) as we have the annual Draft. This show will include all three brands, including ECW for a change. They have really hyped up the idea that ANYONE can be drafted to any show and that seems like they are primed for something interesting. These things can have quite the batch of surprises so maybe we can get that again this time. It’s also Mr. McMahon Appreciation Night, which I’m sure won’t go anywhere. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Vince McMahon reads us a prepared statement, saying that he is in full control of his mental faculties and tonight, you will hear uncensored comments on him from various people. Tonight will be the defining moment of his life.

Opening sequence.

All of the commentators welcome us to the show, saying that there will be interpromotional matches tonight, with the winning brand getting a Draft pick. I’ve heard worse ideas.

John Cena (Raw) vs. Edge (Smackdown)

Non-title. They lock up to start with Cena whipping him hard into the corner and getting one off a suplex. Edge is right back with a running forearm to the back of the head, followed by some shots to the jaw. A kick to the chest puts Cena on the apron and there’s a baseball slide to put him outside. Back in and Edge scores with a clothesline (JR: “Slobberknocker style.”) and a spinwheel kick gets two more.

Cena tries a quick FU but gets kicked in the face instead, setting up a chinlock as they’re certainly at a pretty fast pace early on. After powering up, Cena tries the STFU but Edge is straight into the ropes for another break. The Throwback has some more effect for Cena and now the real comeback is on. Edge misses what looked to be a spear and crashes out to the floor, where Cena loads up the super FU. Since that would cause quite the amount of damage, Edge rakes his eyes and dives in to beat the count for the win.

Rating: C. This was a televised version of a post show dark match they probably did about a hundred times, albeit with a countout instead of a DQ. They didn’t have much time to do anything here but there is nothing wrong with flying through a match when you have this kind of experience and chemistry with someone. It might not have been a classic, but it did what it needed to.

The Draft pick sends….Great Khali to Smackdown, meaning he has now been on all three brands since the beginning of the year. Cena smiles and Edge realizes he’s in trouble. Khali (with interpreter) comes to the stage and Edge panics.

We get a video on Vince McMahon’s introduction into wrestling (from the McMahon DVD, as will be the case with all of his clips tonight) and how he didn’t want people to know he owned the company for a long time. Other than a few quick notes, it wasn’t acknowledged very often on WWF TV until the late 90s.

Jesse Ventura says Vince hasn’t earned the title of Mr. just yet. This company is a dictatorship and Vince isn’t a benevolent dictator. Like the rest of them, Vince will fall one day.

Coach informs us that Vengeance will now be a Night Of Champions (we knew that already) and any former World Champion on the Raw roster at the end of the night can challenge for the WWE Title in the main event. Even if the WWE Title isn’t on Raw? Isn’t that kind of missing the point of the show?

CM Punk (ECW) vs. Carlito (Raw)

Punk knocks him down to start but Carlito manages to dropkick Punk out of the air to take over. A suplex and elbow stay on Punk’s bad ribs and it’s time to grab a bodyscissors. That’s broken up in a hurry and Punk grabs a bodyscissors to put him in trouble instead. The corner bulldog is broken up though and Carlito scores with the Backstabber to send Punk outside. Back in and Punk hits the GTS for the pin out of nowhere (it’s as sudden as it sounds).

Rating: C-. This came and went without much trouble as you can only get so far with a five minute match without that much drama. Punk isn’t going to lose to Carlito, as Carlito has fallen down pretty far in recent months. At the same time, Punk is rising up through the ranks and there was no reason to suggest he was in trouble here.

The Draft pick sends….the Boogeyman to ECW. That makes all the sense in the world actually. Joey: “Just what ECW needed: more freaks.”

Snoop Dogg likes Vince McMahon bringing in great wrestlers…who can beat Vince up.

Another McMahon clip looks at Vince tormenting various people over the years because he is a rather evil man.

Here is Mick Foley for a surprise chat. Normally he doesn’t like listening to Jonathan Coachman, but he heard something mentioned about former WWE Champions being allowed to take part in an open challenge match. Since he was rehired last year, he’s technically part of the Raw roster so he’ll be at Vengeance, assuming he isn’t drafted. As for Vince, he’s an arrogant, misogynistic and horrible person.

Sure Vince has money, but does he have any friends? Of course not! Foley reads off a list of people who won’t be participating tonight despite being asked: Hulk Hogan, HHH, Eric Bischoff, The Rock, Dick Ebersole, Shawn Michaels, Trish Stratus (Foley: “My unofficial fifth child.”) and Ted Turner, all because Vince isn’t worth their time. They don’t appreciate Vince, so should anyone else? The fans say no and Foley agrees, so have a nice day! My biggest take out of that: it’s weird to hear Foley talking about Hulk Hogan.

Umaga (Raw) vs. Balls Mahoney (ECW)

Samoan Spike in less than forty seconds.

The Draft pick sends…..King Booker to Raw. I had forgotten he was a thing. Booker, with Queen Sharmell, comes back to pose for a bit.

Steve-O from Jackass rhymes about Vince McMahon and seems to be a fan.

Bobby Lashley (Raw) vs. Chris Benoit (Smackdown)

Non-title. Lashley tries a spinebuster to start but Benoit grabs the arm and ties it up on the mat. The power can’t quite get Lashley out of trouble so Benoit gets up and chops away. That’s reversed so Lashley can kick away, which the fans don’t quite appreciate. A front facelock slows Benoit down but he is right back to strike away in the corner.

The snap suplex gets two on Lashley and an attempt at a Crossface gets quite the positive reaction. Lashley powers out of that and tries a gorilla press, which is countered into a Crossface (that’s good for a reaction). The rope is grabbed so Benoit takes him down again and grabs the Sharpshooter, which is broken up with straight power. Back up and Lashley tilt-a-whirls Benoit up into a running powerslam for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This is a match that could have been much better with more time and a better story, though what we got was a nice tease. Power vs. technical is a style that has worked for years and it worked well enough here. Not enough time to make it work here, but what we got worked out well enough.

The Draft pick sends….Chris Benoit to ECW. They could use someone like him.

Lashley and Benoit shake hands.

We recap the Draft picks so far.

Donald Trump doesn’t think much of Vince McMahon and talks about how awesome Wrestlemania was. Maybe he should have his own appreciation night.

Ashley Massaro joins us via satellite and thanks Vince for inventing the Diva Search. She does however bring up making Trish Stratus bark like a dog….so here are Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young to disrobe, get on all fours, and bark like dogs (complete with a dog house and food bowl). That’s one of those things that has been forgotten for all the right reasons.

Jimmy Snuka and Iron Sheik join us to thank Vince McMahon for everything he did, though Sheik goes into a rant about Donald Trump and racket ball.

MVP vs. Santino Marella

Non-title. MVP gutwrench suplexes him to start and a clothesline gets two. We hit the cravate to hold Santino in place for a bit, followed by an exchange of kicks to the ribs. Santino gets the worse of things and gets caught in the chinlock, only to fight up with the variety of offense you would expect from someone who has had about five minutes. A fireman’s carry face first drop gives MVP two and a running boot in the corner connects. The Playmaker finishes Santino in a hurry.

Rating: D+. This was little more than a squash, which might not be the best way to present the Intercontinental Title. Then again it does kind of make sense for Marella, who isn’t supposed to be the most polished star in the world. MVP is starting to come into his own and a win like this helps push him a bit further, though I’m not sure how much value Santino had in the first place.

The Draft pick sends….Torrie Wilson to Smackdown.

Bret Hart wants to punch Vince McMahon in the jaw. There’s a name you wouldn’t expect to see on the show and I can go with the surprise.

Miz (Smackdown) vs. Snitsky (ECW)

Snitsky throws him into the corner for the Tree of Woe to start as commentary wonders if Snitsky gets the concept of the Draft. A big boot finishes Miz in a hurry.

The Draft pick….actually goes to Smackdown, as Snitsky keeps stomping away and the decision is reversed.

The Draft pick sends…..Chris Masters to Smackdown. Dang that show is getting wrecked in this thing.

Bobby Heenan talks about everyone Vince has fired and tries to figure out what is up with that walk.

Here is Roddy Piper to introduce a bunch of embarrassing Vince McMahon clips. That’s what you bring in Roddy Piper to do?

Mark Cuban calls Vince McMahon a winner who is living the American dream.

Candice Michelle vs. Kristal

Kristal takes her down and kicks away at the legs but Candice snaps off a backbreaker. The Go Daddy dance gets two and there’s a triangle choke over the ropes to make things worse for Kristal. The spinwheel kick finishes Kristal in a hurry.

The Draft pick sends….Bobby Lashley to Raw. That’s a big one and you had to know Lashley was getting off of ECW one way or another.

Lashley comes out to pose but here is Coach to cut him off. Since Lashley is no longer on ECW, he can’t be the ECW World Champion. Lashley isn’t happy, but promises to be a champion again.

Bob Costas says he wanted to be a WWE broadcaster but Vince McMahon said no. We hear about their infamous interview together and Costas was glad to have a calmer person like Bobby Knight on next.

Jeff Hardy (Raw) vs. Elijah Burke (ECW) vs. Batista (Smackdown)

Burke bails straight to the floor to start but Hardy jumps him from behind. Back in and Batista fires off the shoulders to Hardy’s ribs in the corner, only to have Hardy slip out of the Batista Bomb. Hardy takes him down and hits the Swanton for a very early two with Burke making the save. Batista gets sent outside, leaving Hardy to hit Burke with the slingshot dropkick. Back in and Batista runs Hardy over, setting up the Batista Bomb to finish Burke.

Rating: C. This was more interesting than I would have expected and it was cool to see some people going at it that you wouldn’t usually see get together. If nothing else, it made me want to see Hardy vs. Batista, which somehow never happened in a singles match. You would think their paths would have crossed at some point somewhere over the years.

The Draft pick sends….Ric Flair to Smackdown. Flair could use the change of scenery.

John Cena was at a car race.

Captain Lou Albano talks about how great he is. Vince McMahon is ok too.

Here’s a recap of the Draft picks. There will also be a supplemental Draft on Wednesday.

Here is Dusty Rhodes to talk about Vince McMahon loving to say “perception is reality”. Dusty says that you might not like Vince, but look at the reality of what he has done. You have to respect him.

Gene Okerlund talks about Vince McMahon letting him become the new host of Tuesday Night Titans….while knowing it would be canceled. We also hear about a bunch of horrible things Vince has done, as Gene doesn’t seem to be a fan.

Battle Royal

Smackdown: Matt Hardy, William Regal, Chavo Guerrero, Mark Henry, Chris Masters,

ECW: Kevin Thorn, Matt Striker, Marcus Cor Von, Sandman, Tommy Dreamer

Raw: Johnny Nitro, Eugene, Kenny Dykstra, Randy Orton, Johnny Nitro

The winning brand gets two picks. It’s a brawl to start (as battle royals tend to do) and Striker is gone in a hurry. Sandman, Regal and Chavo are out as well, with Dreamer following them as the ring is clearing in a hurry. Thorn gets knocked out too and it’s time for Viscera and Henry to have the big showdown.

Henry can’t get him out but he can clothesline Viscera down, followed by the big elimination. We take a break and come back with Eugene and Dykstra gone to leave us with Henry, Cor Von, Orton, Nitro, Masters and Hardy. The Pounce is loaded up but Hardy low bridges Cor Von out to get rid of ECW.

Masters throws Nitro out but Hardy gets rid of him as well, leaving us with Henry, Hardy and Orton. Matt can’t get rid of Henry but it’s enough for Orton to come over and toss Henry out, leaving us with two. A Side Effect drops Orton but the backbreaker cuts Hardy down as well. Hardy is back with the middle rope elbow to the head but Orton tosses him out to give Raw the win anyway.

Rating: C-. You can only get so far with a battle royal where there are brands instead of individual winners, though they did a good job of having Orton get the win. It’s pretty clear that he is on his way to a huge showdown with John Cena so having him get a win here was a nice little boost. The rest of the match was your usual battle royal stuff, so it wasn’t quite the most thrilling part of the show.

The Draft picks send….Snitsky and Mr. Kennedy to Raw. One of those things is a little better than the others. I mean Snitsky for having no hair of course.

Here are the final Draft picks:

To Raw
King Booker w/Queen Sharmell
Bobby Lashley
Snitsky
Mr. Kennedy

To Smackdown
Great Khali
Torrie Wilson
Chris Masters
Ric Flair

To ECW
Boogeyman
Chris Benoit

Vince McMahon is in his office and seems a bit nuts.

Steve Austin laughs off the idea of Vince McMahon Appreciation Night and goes over some great moments of their rivalry. He doesn’t appreciate anything about Vince at all. Swearing ensues.

Since the rosters are now set (as we are already ignoring the supplemental draft), the main event of Vengeance will see Mick Foley, Bobby Lashley (still with the ECW World Title in the graphic), Randy Orton and King Booker challenging John Cena. That is some serious star power.

Here is Vince McMahon for the big closing. Vince, with his hand shaking, picks up the microphone and then drops it back down. Without saying anything, Vince slowly walks to the back, passing by the wrestlers (who are all standing in line for no logical reason). Coach pops in to say the limo is the other way so Vince turns around, passes more wrestlers, plus Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco, before heading outside.

Vince hesitates to get into the limo, gets inside….and it blows up as the door closes. The limo burns to end the show. And now we have a rather big/hot top story. I remember watching this live and thinking it would blow up as he looked at it like that. No idea why, but it’s the kind of thing that WWE would do.

Overall Rating: C+. It certainly wasn’t a boring show and a lot of things did happen, but it also wasn’t exactly great. This wasn’t the kind of show where you should have expected anything great in the way of wrestling, but what we got was good enough to carry the night. The shakeups needed to happen, though Smackdown is looking more and more like the dumping ground for wrestlers with nothing else to do on Raw.

Then there is the Vince stuff, and again the story feels rushed. The testimonials from the people might not have been great, but some people did say nice things about Vince. That being said, it does make sense that he would be crushed when he wasn’t in his right mind to begin with. The whodunit story is on though, and I’m sure it will reach a satisfying conclusion.

 

 

 

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Smackdown – June 8, 2007: What An Odd Duck

Smackdown
Date: June 8, 2007
Location: Amway Arena, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

One Night Stand has come and gone and not a lot has changed around here. Edge beat Batista to retain the World Title again and other than that….yeah that’s about it really. It wasn’t a major show, but now we need to get ready for Vengeance, which will be focused on the titles. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge to get things going. Before we get started, Edge calms the people down by saying that he’ll be in action tonight. Well at least he should, as Vickie Guerrero is making a double main event and he better be involved. As for the Cutting Edge though, he has a guest who requested to be on the show: Vince McMahon! Vince is still looking all shaken up so Edge asks how he is feeling. He quotes the 23rd Psalm before changing the ending to say that thou aren’t with me.

Edge brings up the Draft and how Smackdown needs to be shaken up. Vince looks like he is having severe stomach pains as Edge sucks up to him, even handing him the World Title. That’s too far for Vince, who gets up to say that Edge is no better than John Cena or Bobby Lashley. Vengeance will be his, so at Vengeance, Edge is defending the title against Batista. Vince: “Life sucks and then you die.” The match is a Do Or Die match, though we don’t actually get an explanation of what that means. Vince is still rather odd here and it’s kind of awesome, though it still feels like it came up really fast.

Boogeyman vs. Mark Henry

Little Boogeyman is here too. Henry headbutts Boogeyman to start but seems to stagger himself a bit. We’re already in the bearhug on Boogeyman but Henry lets go to beat up Little Boogeyman. The World’s Strongest Slam finishes for Henry in a hurry.

Post match Henry beats up Little Boogeyman, including a World’s Strongest Slam and a splash.

Vickie Guerrero announces our main events: Edge vs. Chris Benoit and Batista vs. MVP.

Post break, Kristal comes in to see Vickie Guerrero to praise her for her work so far. Teddy Long says Vickie wasn’t bad for her first time but here is Vince McMahon to be all nuts and say that Kristal is Long’s problem. She’s half his age! Vince leaves and Teddy isn’t happy.

Jamie Noble/Daivari/Chavo Guerrero vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Brian Kendrick/Paul London

Yang and Noble start us off as the Jung Dragons explode (or at least wrestle). Noble gets armdragged into an armbar before it’s off to London to twist the arm as well. Chavo comes in and gets armdragged as well as they’re certainly moving fast. A monkey flip allows the tag to Yang, who comes in off a high crossbody.

Daivari comes in and stomps Yang down, followed by Noble doing the same. The chinlock goes on for a bit before Chavo grabs a suplex for two. Yang finally kicks Noble away though and the hot tag brings in Kendrick to clean house. Noble gets in a cheap shot though and everything breaks down. Yang hits a springboard dive to the floor, leaving Chavo to get caught in an assisted Sliced Bread for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was the kind of fun six man tag you would expect with the champion taking the pin, as you would probably also expect. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a title as intentionally devalued as the Cruiserweight Title, but it would be nice if WWE did anything to try and make it seem valuable.

Edge vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and we’re told that Edge vs. Batista is on no matter what happens in the Draft. Feeling out process to start with Benoit working on an aggressive wristlock. An armdrag sends Edge into the corner so Benoit just stares at him. Benoit takes it to the mat again and grabs a chinlock, followed by an armbar. Back up and a hard whip into the corner gets two but Edge is in the ropes before the Crossface can go on. Edge has to fight his way out of a German suplex from the apron and we take a break.

Back with Benoit holding a cravate so Edge rakes the eyes to escape. Benoit sends him outside and hits a baseball slide into the barricade to put Edge right back in trouble. Edge is fine enough to whip him hard into the corner but Benoit headbutts his way out of a superplex attempt.

The Swan Dive misses though and Edge gets two. A big boot connects for the same and Edge works on the arm but Benoit scores with an enziguri. Benoit rolls the snap suplexes and then rolls the German suplexes for a bonus. The Swan Dive connects but Benoit can’t get the Crossface. Edge is back up for the spear but that gets countered into the Crossface, sending Edge to the rope. Back up and now the spear can connect to give Edge the pin.

Rating: B. This felt like a big time main event level match so well done at making something work. Sometimes you need to have two talented people wrestle a long match and that’s what we got here. These two have some great chemistry together and Benoit made Edge work hard to survive.

Ashley is getting her hair and makeup done when Jillian Hall comes up to say Ashley can’t look as good as she does. Jillian says if Ashley had talent, she wouldn’t have to interfere in other people’s matches. Ashley threatens violence if they wind up on the same show (tonight has no consequences apparently). A slap lets Jillian run away, with Ashley in pursuit.

Matt Hardy is signing something for charity when Vince McMahon comes up to ask how he is doing. Hardy talks about how brutal things have been for him lately but here is Ashley to knock Vince’s coffee onto him. This earns Matt a handicap match with Deuce N Domino. Matt leaves to get ready so Vince asks how Ashley is doing. She feels terrible but Vince laughs a lot and suspends her. Ashley breaks down in tears as Vince leaves.

Matt Hardy vs. Deuce N Domino

Non-title. The double stomping is on in a hurry but Matt manages to knock Domino outside. That leaves Deuce to kick Matt in the bad ribs for two and here’s Domino to clothesline Matt down again. Double stomping sends us to a break and we come back with Matt crotching Domino on top. A clothesline gets two on Deuce but Matt has to deal with the returning Domino. Matt can barely get up so Domino kicks him in the face for the pin.

Rating: C-. Matt tried to make this competitive but it was a match that didn’t need to go as long as it did. The Tag Team Champions shouldn’t have that much trouble beating up a banged up Matt Hardy, though it was nice to see him fighting back for a bit. There was a story of Matt fighting his way through the pain but just coming up short, so this could have been a lot worse.

MVP brags about how great he is and how he has everything these people don’t, including a title. He is straight up ballin and he’ll prove it to Batista tonight.

Commentary recaps Vince McMahon’s insanity.

MVP vs. Batista

Non-title. They start slowly with MVP getting in a quick shot and posing, earning himself a drive into the corner. MVP starts kicking at the leg and gets knocked down again as Batista is right back with a clothesline. We take a break and come back with MVP getting whipped hard into the corner. A suplex gives Batista two but he misses a charge in the corner so MVP can kick away.

MVP’s big running kick sends Batista outside and it’s a bunch of right hands back inside. The catapult sends Batista throat first into the bottom rope for two and there’s another kick to the head to send him outside. Back in again and MVP grabs a chinlock with a knee in the back, followed by some knees to the face. Somehow that’s enough to make Batista fight back, including the running clotheslines in the corner. The swinging Boss Man Slam connects but here is Edge to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was a bit of a surprise as they got some time to set up a good match. I was worried that they were going to have MVP take the pin here so well done on going with the good ending. Edge vs. Batista doesn’t quite need to go to a third match but that’s about all they can do at this point. Pretty good main event here, mainly due to not making any dumb decisions.

Post match Batista goes after Edge, who runs from the threat of a Batista Bomb to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Another fairly strong show here, though your taste in the latest Vince stuff may vary. Vince being so out of it after losing the ECW World Title is a way they can go, but it still feels really rushed. That being said, crazy Vince walking around tormenting people is something that can work out well and it’s adding some spice to what has otherwise been a pretty dull start to the summer.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – June 5, 2007: Good Timing Makes Bad Time

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 5, 2007
Location: Amway Arena, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with One Night Stand and some ECW things actually took place on the show. First and foremost, Bobby Lashley got the ECW World Title back from Vince McMahon, which should wrap their feud up for good. Other than that, Rob Van Dam seems to be out of action for the time being after Randy Orton beat the living daylights out of him. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Lashley winning the handicap match to get the title back.

Opening sequence.

Here is Vince McMahon, sitting in a rocking chair on a platform, with a rather annoyed glare on his face. Bobby Lashley comes out as Vince keeps rocking back and forth without doing much of anything.

Bobby Lashley vs. Tommy Dreamer/Sandman/Balls Mahoney

Non-title hardcore match. The trio grabs their weapons and start swinging to put Lashley on the floor. Back in and they do it again, followed by a third time for good measure. For some reason Dreamer thinks a suplex is a good idea and gets suplexed down for his efforts. Sandman and Mahoney drape Lashley over the top with Sandman dropping a leg to the back of the neck. Dreamer is back in for the baseball slide to the chair in the Tree of Woe. It’s table time (because of course) but Mahoney chairs Dreamer by mistake. That’s enough for Lashley to put Sandman through the table and spear Mahoney down for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can only get so much out of something like this as Lashley isn’t going to lose to three people so low on the totem pole. I guess this is the best punishment Vince can muster at the moment and while it wasn’t awful, it was spending a few minutes waiting around for Lashley to beat them up. Just find something better for Lashley to do already.

Post match, Lashley poses in front of Vince, who doesn’t move.

Kevin Thorn vs. Stevie Richards

Richards forearms away to start and sends Thorn outside. The dive off the apron is pulled out of the air though, allowing Thorn to drive him into the apron. Back in and the chinlock goes on until Richards fights up, only to be dropped face first onto the turnbuckle instead. Richards strikes away and sends Thorn throat first into the middle rope fir a change. A spinebuster cuts Richards off though and Original Sin is good for pin.

Rating: D. This was another boring one as Thorn isn’t all that interesting once he gets in the ring. The vampire deal is a cool idea but other than the finisher, he’s just another low level power guy. Richards was trying as always, but there wasn’t much anyone could do in these circumstances.

Extreme Expose, who mix it up this week by adding some dancing on the announcers’ table.

We look at Randy Orton injuring Rob Van Dam at One Night Stand, putting Van Dam on the shelf.

Elijah Burke/Marcus Cor Von vs. Major Brothers

Cor Von charges at them to start and the beating is on in a hurry. Brett starts working on the arm though and Brian comes in with a top rope ax handle. That doesn’t work so well so it’s off to Burke, who gets double hiptossed right back down. Cor Von isn’t having this though and comes back in to run both of them over.

A slam in the corner sets up Burke’s seated abdominal stretch, followed by Cor Von’s waistlock. Cor Von knees Brett in the ribs to cut off the comeback and Burke puts on a standing abdominal stretch. For some reason he lets that go though and knees Brett in the back, sending him over to the corner for the tag to Brian. The comeback doesn’t please Cor Von so he tags himself back in to hit the Pounce for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can definitely see something in the Major Brothers, as they feel like a team who know each other well. It also helps that they have gotten some TV time now and have a bit of familiarity with the fans. The New Breed is all but done at this point, but a win over the Majors isn’t going to hurt anyone at the moment.

We recap the opening match, including Vince McMahon almost looking like he was in a trance.

CM Punk vs. Matt Striker

Before the match, Striker promises to teach Punk a lesson to educate these people cheering for him. Punk leg lariats him down to start and a pair of kicks gets two more. Striker comes back with some suplexes and a slam, setting up the half crab. With that broken up, Striker hits a hanging swinging neckbreaker before going right back to the same hold. Punk escapes again and starts striking away, including the running knee in the corner. The bulldog sets up the GTS to give Punk the pin.

Rating: C-. There’s only so much you can get out of Striker, who much like Thorn, is a far better character that he is a wrestler. It also doesn’t help that Punk is one of the biggest stars on this show and isn’t losing to anyone but another big star. Striker put in the effort here, but it was only going to get him so far.

Overall Rating: D+. This was quite the lame duck show as we are less than a week away from the Draft so none of this really mattered all that much. Vince still being broken was the highlight, as he is still one of the best performers in the world. Things need to be shaken up around here so the Draft is coming at the right time, but it didn’t exactly make for a good show this week.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 4, 2007: Double Giants

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 4, 2007
Location: St. Pete Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with One Night Stand and on the way to the Draft, followed by Vengeance. That could make for an interesting few weeks, but I don’t think it’s going to make for a great time this week. This very well could be a lame duck show, which is not something WWE tends to do well. Let’s get to it.

Here is One Night Stand if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s John Cena to get things going. Cena listens to the mixed reaction and says this is what he loves about WWE. He thanks everyone who came to the show tonight, from the fat guy booing up there to the hot chick in the top two sizes too small (Cena: “THANK YOU FOR COMING TONIGHT!”). Cena thinks it’s a little bit louder this week though because after six weeks of getting beaten up, the 7’5 giant has been told FU.

It’s more of the same around here, because he thinks he’s in the clear and now they’re springing the Draft on him. He has been drafted before so this might be the last time he is in the ring as part of Raw. If that’s the case, then he’s going to take all of this in one more time and say THE CHAMP IS….being cut off by Vince McMahon, who is rather banged up.

Vince can barely stand up or talk but he thinks Cena is out here to embarrass him for no longer being a World Champion. That’s not going to happen because Vince isn’t going to bend, bow or break. His name is Vincent Kennedy….and Cena turns his back on him. Cena says he’s going to tell himself that Vince is just beat up and delusional. Vince tries to say his name again but Cena turns his back again, saying the only thing keeping Vince alive is his patience.

Cena tells Vince to get it out of his system because he is out of his frigging mind. Vince: “YOU’RE A LIAR!” He explains that he hasn’t lost a thing…except for a World Title. That’s what Cena is going to do tonight when he defends the title against Umaga and Great Khali. Cena looks crushed as Vince is nearly beaming. This was a weird segment as Vince went fully nuts almost overnight and Cena got fed up with him in a hurry. It feels like something that should have come after a few weeks, not a day after Vince lost the title.

Candice Michelle/Cryme Tyme vs. Johnny Nitro/Kenny Dykstra/Melina

Michelle is in full Cryme Tyme gear and Lawler isn’t sure what to think about this one. Dykstra is now carrying a mirror but Melina seems to get more use out of it. The women almost get in a fight before the bell but it’s JTG punching Dykstra in the face to start. Nitro gets in a shot so Dykstra can take over, allowing Nitro to flip JTG into the corner for two. The chinlock goes on for a bit but JTG fights up and brings in Shad to clean house. Everything breaks down and the G9 finishes Nitro.

Rating: D+. Pretty standard six person tag here, which seemed to be more about getting Candice in a different outfit. I’m glad to see Cryme Tyme getting another chance though as they definitely stand out and their push just stopped a few months ago. The division needs some fresh blood so maybe they can get another shot.

Maria likes the Intercontinental Title, because it’s shiny like her dress. Vince McMahon (still smiling weirdly) comes up and says he used to have one of those titles. Maria starts to say something but gets told to shut up. Santino says you can’t talk to a woman like that so Vince makes a title match right now. He throws in a slap to the face and tells Santino to “get” about ten times.

Intercontinental Title: Santino Marella vs. Chris Masters

Santino is defending and kicks at the leg to start. Masters grabs the rope to avoid a dropkick though and it’s time to talk about the Draft. A running leg shot to the back of the neck against the ropes vies Masters two and we hit the neck crank. That’s broken up and an STO gives Marella two. The Masterlock is blocked and Santino flips him over, setting up something close to an Oklahoma roll for the pin.

Rating: D+. These two have fought a few times now and I don’t know why there is no one else for Santino to face. The matches aren’t exactly good, but that is partially because every Masters match is about trying the Masterlock and nothing else. Nothing to see here, but at least they kept it short.

The Hardys are banged up when Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch come in to ask for a title shot, albeit when the Hardys are healthy. That’s cool with the Hardys, but Vince McMahon comes up, mocks them for being southern, and makes the title match for tonight. Cade and Murdoch don’t look happy with the news.

Vince keeps walking and runs into Ric Flair and Torrie Wilson. Torrie looks scared, so Vince says he can’t stand a degenerate hanging out with a woman half his age. For some reason, Torrie thinks it’s a good time to bring up the time Linda McMahon caught Vince with Torrie and his pants around his ankles. That earns Torrie a match with Carlito. Torrie leaves and Flair tells Vince to get over a single loss. Vince is sick of hearing the WOOing, but it makes Flair a legend, so he can face the Legend Killer Randy Orton. This was much more deranged crazy Vince and that’s a good thing.

Randy Orton vs. Ric Flair

Flair (in the weird black boots/red trunks combination) strikes away to start and unloads with right hands in the corner. Orton is back with a powerslam and loads up the RKO but we take a break. Back with Flair putting on the Figure Four but Orton makes the rope in a hurry. The backbreaker drops Flair and Orton gets in the circle stomp. Orton drops the knee but it bangs up his knee again so we hit the chinlock to let him rest it a bit. The comeback doesn’t last long as Flair walks into a dropkick.

We hit the chinlock again but this time Flair suplexes his way to freedom. Apparently Orton doesn’t like being suplexed so he punches Flair down in the corner, earning a poke to the eye. Orton hits a running corner clothesline to give us a Flair Flop but Flair is back up with an elbow to the face. A suplex drops Flair on the floor this time and JR quotes Foreigner to talk about how cold Orton is. Back in and Orton hits the Punt but Flair pulls himself up again…so the RKO can finish him off.

Rating: B-. If you want to get a villain over, there are few better choices that having him destroy Flair. Orton is feeling more and more like a predator every time he is in the ring as of late and adding another body to the list is going to make things even better. You can feel the huge match with Cena coming and they’re making Orton feel special on the way there.

Post match Orton loads up another Punk but the referee threatens him away.

Carlito vs. Torrie Wilson

Torrie has a bad leg so Carlito offers to let her walk away. Torrie tries and gets caught with the Backstabber for the pin in less than a minute. That’s all it needed to be.

Tag Team Titles: Hardys vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

The banged up Hardys are defending and we get a handshake to start. Matt and Cade go to the mat to start for an exchange of arm cranking. Cade elbows him in the face for two and it’s off to Murdoch to stay on the arm. Matt gets over for the tag to Jeff to pick up the pace, including Poetry In Motion with Cade having to make the save. Jeff dives over the top onto Murdoch but bangs up his knee in the process.

We take a break and come back with Cade slamming Matt down and dropping a knee to the back. The sitout spinebuster gives Cade two more and it’s Murdoch grabbing a waistlock. Somehow Matt twists that around and grabs a reverse DDT, allowing the tag off to Jeff, who can barely walk. Jeff cleans house anyway but gets caught going up top. Matt catches Cade with the Twist of Fate but Jeff misses the Swanton, allowing Cade to get the pin. Ignore Murdoch shoving Jeff’s foot off the rope.

Rating: C+. The ending leaves a door open for later if that’s where they want to go, but at least they finally changed the titles. There wasn’t much left for these guys to do and they have an out with the Hardys being injured. Cade and Murdoch getting another run with the belts is not a bad thing either, as the Hardys never felt like anything more than transitional champions.

Post match Matt asks if Cade saw the foot on the ropes….and the Hardys get laid out with belt shots to the face. As they should have.

Coach is in Vince McMahon’s office but Vince isn’t happy. Vince has an ominous feeling, but he also has an idea for next week. Coach seems to already know what that is and Vince tells him to go inform the people.

Post break here is Coach to say that next week will be the Draft, but also Vince McMahon Appreciation Night.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Umaga vs. Great Khali

Cena is defending and charges right into a clothesline from Khali. Umaga heads outside to grab a chair as Khali chokes Cena in the corner and kicks him to the floor. A hard whip sends Cena into the steps but Umaga throws the steps at Khali’s face (DANG) for a knockdown. Back in and Umaga blasts Cena with a clothesline of his own but Cena avoids a sitdown splash.

Umaga knocks him down again and hits a springboard sitdown splash to the chest. Another only lands on raised knees but Umaga is fine enough to plant Cena again. Khali comes back in though and we get the battle of the monsters for quite the visual. I’m not sure what quite, but quite.

They slug it out until Khali hits something resembling a spinning kick to the face and then elbows Cena as he tries to come back in. There’s the legdrop for two on Cena and the big chop follows but Umaga breaks up the double arm chokeslam. Khali loads up the chokeslam on Umaga but gets Samoan Spiked. Cena manages to knock Umaga outside and hit the FU on Khali to retain out of nowhere.

Rating: C. They did what they could here but this was all about having Cena survive against impossible odds. That’s kind of what Cena does every time, though you don’t often see Khali have steps thrown at his face. That alone was good enough to catch your attention and the rest of the match went as well as it could have gone given the circumstances.

Cena poses to end the show, though commentary knows that Vince is going to be angry.

Overall Rating: C. I liked the show well enough, even with how fast Vince went nuts over losing the title. It seemed like a vanity deal for him and now he’s acting like it meant more than the World Title did to HHH five years ago. The good thing is that tied the show together and what we got worked out fairly well. The show takes awhile to get going but it took off a lot more by the end. Now forget about almost all of that, because it’s time for the Draft.

 

 

 

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One Night Stand 2007 (2021 Redo): The Gimmick’s The Thing

One Night Stand 2007
Date: June 3, 2007
Location: Jacksonville Veterans Memorial, Jacksonville, Florida
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s what almost has to be the final cycle of Wrestlemania rematches and early summer stories. The build for this has not been great, which probably has a lot to do with it being a mere two weeks after Backlash. The card isn’t looking the best either, but maybe they can surprise me. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how everything is extreme rules for one night only, though in this case it means everything has its own stipulations. There’s a better name for the show in there somewhere.

Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam

This is a stretcher match and fallout from Orton attacking Van Dam and giving him a concussion, which was fallout from Orton attacking Shawn Michaels and giving him a concussion. Van Dam does the finger pointing and then kicks Orton in the face to start fast. Some more strikes keep Orton rocked early, including a running clothesline in the corner. A kick to the face sets up the spinning legdrop but Orton gets in a shot to the face to put Van Dam down, complete with bugged out eyes.

Van Dam is fine enough to kick Orton in the face but the jump to the top means a crash out to the floor. Orton slowly brings him back inside for the dropkick before slowly knocking Van Dam down a few times. The over the shoulder neckbreaker drops Van Dam but he falls off the stretcher. For some reason that wakes Van Dam up and he posts Orton down.

Now it’s Orton being laid on the stretcher for the spinning kick to the back. They head back inside with Van Dam hitting a clothesline but Rolling Thunder is reversed into the powerslam in a slick counter. Van Dam manages to toss him onto the stretcher again, but a big running flip dive over the top only hits floor in a nasty landing. Orton drops him onto the stretcher but Van Dam fights up and puts Orton on for the surprise win.

Rating: C. This was a bit of a weird match as Orton beat Van Dam up for a good while and then lost in the end, despite Van Dam looking destroyed more than once. Van Dam deserves some attention for his facials alone and there was a nice story being told. Maybe not a great match and I’m not sure on Orton winning, but they did something different enough here.

Post match Orton is right back up and beats Van Dam back to ringside. The Punt off the apron sets up the hanging DDT from the barricade, which ends Van Dam’s full time WWE career for the time being. Aside from some cameos, Van Dam would not be back until 2013.

Vince McMahon is worried about the street fight with Bobby Lashley but Shane McMahon says Umaga will take care of things. That helps, but Vince has a premonition of something bad happening to him.

Sandman/Tommy Dreamer/CM Punk vs. New Breed

Tables match, meaning we have tags. Dreamer and Cor Von go technical to start, including a butterfly suplex to put Dreamer down. Burke comes in but misses a charge in the corner, allowing the tag off to Sandman. That means a hiptoss before Punk comes in to a big reaction for some knees to Striker. Punk and Dreamer want some tables but Punk has to dive on Cor Von first.

Back in and Striker runs from Sandman and the kendo stick before Cor Von has to save him from the table. Burke hits a quick elbow to Punk’s bad ribs and it’s everyone inside to brawl again. We hit the parade of secondary finishers, including Cor Von Alpha Bombing Punk. Dreamer piledrives Burke and Punk superplexes Striker through Burke and the table for the win.

Rating: C-. This could have been any ECW On Sci Fi main event and that isn’t the worst place to be. The problem here was the time and the lack of any real story to the whole thing, as they just wildly brawled for the most part. Granted that’s what this probably should have been and now it is time to wrap up the New Breed as Punk can move on to something bigger.

Randy Orton comes up to see Edge and suggests that he’s coming for the World Heavyweight Title, if Edge beats Batista tonight and if he gets moved to Smackdown in the Draft. That’s quite the hypothetical and Edge doesn’t seem scared.

Raw Tag Team Titles: World’s Greatest Tag Team Team vs. Hardys

The Hardys are defending in a ladder match. It’s a fight to start with the Hardys knocking both of them down in a row. Since that doesn’t mean much in a ladder match, all four head outside and pick up a ladder of their own. The dueling is on until Haas gets crushed by ladders in the corner, setting up Poetry In Motion to Shelton to smash Haas again.

Haas is fine enough to get out and pull Jeff off the ladder but Matt is there to make the save. The Hardys go up at the same time (which is stupid), allowing Shelton to throw a ladder at them to bring them back down (I knew it was stupid). Jeff is sent face first into the ladder in the corner and Haas and Benjamin, apparently not learning, go up at the same time as well.

Matt breaks that up in a hurry but it’s time to set up ladder contraptions. That takes too long though and the Hardys send both of them back first into a ladder. Now it’s time to bring in the bigger ladders, because the ladder match checklist must be completed. One such ladder is bridged between the ring and the apron, with Benjamin being backdropped onto it in a hurry.

That’s not good enough so Jeff loads up something off the top but Haas belly to back superplexes him down. Haas leans Matt up against a ladder on the floor and Jeff gets t-boned. That doesn’t seem to bother Matt though as he shoves Haas and Benjamin down, the latter onto a ladder, setting up a Swanton to keep them down. Matt pulls the titles down to retain.

Rating: B. Like this wasn’t going to work. It’s a match I didn’t care to see but knew it was going to be good, which was absolutely what happened here. Sometimes you need to let people who are good at this kind of thing do their stuff and that was the case here. It was nothing that hadn’t been done before, but it was done well.

Great Khali promises to win.

Mark Henry vs. Kane

Lumberjack match and the lumberjacks get their own individual entrances. Henry powers him to the floor to start but Kane is back in to kick Henry in the face. That doesn’t bother Henry much either so Kane slugs him out to the floor and follows him out. This time Henry rams him into the post to start working on the back and hammers away in it inside. A test of strength doesn’t work well for Henry as Kane headbutts his way to freedom, only to get shouldered down.

Kane can’t pick Henry up and we hit the bearhug, with Henry eventually throwing him down. Henry gets tossed outside so Kane dives onto a bunch of people for the big crash. Back in and Kane hits the top rope clothesline to set up the chokeslam but the lumberjacks come in to beat him down. Since it’s No DQ, Henry grabs the bearhug again and Kane is out for the win.

Rating: D. The gimmick didn’t do the match any favors here and it felt rather forced in. I get that they had to do something to make this an extreme match but it was basically Henry hurting Kane’s back, some interference, and then Henry wins. That could have been done without the lumberjacks and that is never a good sign for any match.

The Hardys and the World’s Greatest Tag Team get in a fight backstage.

We recap Bobby Lashley vs. Vince McMahon for the ECW World Title. Lashley helped shave McMahon’s head at Wrestlemania so Vince swore revenge and eventually took the title with some help from Shane McMahon and Umaga. After screwing Lashley over a time or two, it is time for the final showdown in a street fight.

ECW World Title: Vince McMahon vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is challenging in a street fight and Shane McMahon/Umaga are here with Vince. Lashley wastes no time in diving over the top onto Umaga, who he grazes with his feet at best. Now it’s Shane getting beaten up and tossed onto Umaga at ringside, leaving Lashley to unload on Vince in the corner.

Umaga comes back in to miss a splash in the corner but Shane is back in with a DDT onto a chair. Vince clotheslines Lashley down and chokes in the corner before they head outside. More triple teaming ensues before heading back inside where Vince can hit a spear for two. Lashley pulls Vince in the way of Umaga’s splash though and the comeback is on.

Shane and Umaga are sent outside and Lashley unloads on Vince with a chair. The Dominator gets two with Umaga making the save, setting up a splash from the apron. Shane adds the top rope elbow through the announcers’ table and everyone is down again. That only gives Vince two back inside so Umaga hits the running hip attack in the corner. Shane misses Coast To Coast though and Lashley is back up with the spear to Vince to get the title back.

Rating: C. This was the fairly obvious way to go and there is nothing wrong with that. Sometimes you need to go in the logical way and this time around that meant Lashley running through the odds and getting the title back. Lashley is a monster, but now he needs something else to do, which unfortunately won’t involve Vince as the amazing ECW heel. Not a great match or a great brawl, but it did what it was supposed to do.

Post match Lashley hits another spear on Vince for a bonus.

Maria likes Santino Marella speaking Italian to her but she has to answer a question about the upcoming pudding match between Melina and Candice Michelle. As you might guess, her response features a lot of big words and scientific explanations about pudding. Candice pops up and asks for a kiss for luck. Maria obliges, so Santino says he loves America. Ron Simmons comes in for the catchphrase.

Melina vs. Candice Michelle

Non-title and they’re fighting in pudding. Candice shoves her down and they grapple around a lot, as you can probably guess how this is going. They fight on the floor a bit and Lawler can’t tell which is which, though he doesn’t seem to care. Melina licks some pudding off of her thumb and hits a DDT. Trash talking ensues, but Candice pulls her into a reverse chinlock for the tap (on pudding). Exactly what you would have expected.

Post match Maria comes in for an interview but gets pulled into the pudding. The referee is pulled in as well and Lawler is jealous.

We recap Edge vs. Batista for the Smackdown World Title. Edge cashed in Money in the Bank to take the title from Undertaker, then cheated to beat Batista at Judgment Day. Now it’s time for Batista to get his rematch inside a cage.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Edge

Edge is defending in a cage. Batista starts fast by taking him down and going up but it’s way too early for that. Edge tries to go up but gets pulled back down, earning himself a heck of a clothesline for two. A few shots to the face aren’t enough for Edge to get out as Lashley suplexes him down for two more.

Now it’s Batista going up, only to have his leg kicked out for the save. That’s enough to weaken Batista’s already damaged leg but he’s fine enough to catch Edge trying for the door. A superplex gives Batista two and they collide in the middle off a spear vs. running shoulder for the double knockdown. It’s Batista up first with a running clothesline and a swinging Boss Man Slam gets two.

A catapult sends Edge face first into the cage and Batista launches him face first in again. Somehow Edge manages a quick spear for two but Batista pulls him off the top for the same. The Batista Bomb is countered (with Edge’s thong sticking out) as Edge winds up on top. Batista follows him up but gets low blowed back down. Batista goes for the door but Edge climbs out to escape and retain.

Rating: C. That’s it? That felt like the setup for another false finish and then they just finished the match. It wasn’t terrible, but it seemed like they were missing the last five or so minutes. This should put Batista out of the title picture for the time being, though I’m not sure what that leaves for him to do at the moment. Edge can find someone new though, and he can do so after beating Batista pretty clean.

We recap John Cena vs. Great Khali. Cena retained the title at Judgment Day but Khali’s leg was underneath the ropes. That’s why tonight it’s a falls count anywhere match for the title, meaning the ropes can’t save Cena. The idea here is that Cena knows he’s facing a monster and might be in way over his head.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Great Khali

Cena is defending in a falls count anywhere match. Cena goes right after him to start but is quickly knocked down, including a bunch of stomping in the corner. There’s a slam to plant Cena but he gets in a shot of his own for a breather. Khali is right back up with a chop to the head to put Cena on the floor though and the foot on the chest gets two. A hard ram sends Cena head first through a monitor but another big chop is blocked.

Instead, Cena is tossed over the barricade but he manages a monitor shot of his own. The FU attempt is swatted away though and Khali punches him around. A missed charge (work with me here) misses for Khali and Cena hits him in the face with a boom camera for two. Cena gets him off the ground for the FU but some elbows to the face get Khali out of trouble again. They fight onto a crane, where Cena finally manages the FU off of said crane to retain the title.

Rating: C+. While certainly not a classic, they did this as well as they could have. What mattered here was they found the right way to hide Khali’s limitations and let Cena do the rest. The idea of setting up the FU for the whole match and then blowing it off in the end was the right call too and it was a well set up match. I’m not sure how much better they could have done this and the stipulation made the match better rather than just being tacked on.

Overall Rating: C. This was a show that focused almost entirely on the gimmicks and that was not a bad thing. The stories were either mostly done or not exactly exciting, so putting the emphasis on everything else they were doing was the right idea. It made for an easy show to watch, even if it didn’t feel all that important. We need to move on in a big way, but at least they had a fine enough show to wrap up this cycle.

 

 

 

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Smackdown – June 1, 2007: They’re Doing What They Can

Smackdown
Date: June 1, 2007
Location: John Labatt Centre, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the last Smackdown before One Night Stand but we also have to finish the build to Saturday Night’s Main Event, because the one thing that WWE needed at this point is more content. Last week saw Batista become the #1 contender again, meaning he gets a shot at Edge and the World Title in a cage on Sunday. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Chris Benoit/Matt Hardy vs. MVP/The Miz

The graphic says Mike Mizanin but commentary calls him the Miz. Benoit and MVP lock up to start with MVP getting pummeled into the corner. It’s off to Hardy for a back elbow and elbow drop for two so Miz comes in to get beaten up as well. A backbreaker gives Benoit two, followed by a snap suplex for the same. Miz sends Benoit into the corner though and rams him head first into the mat for two.

The Mizard of Oz gets two on Benoit, who suplexes his way out of trouble again. That’s enough for the tag to Hardy, who pulls Miz out of the corner into a sitout powerbomb for two of his own. Everything breaks down and the villains are cleared out as we take a break. Back with Miz hammering away and cutting off Matt’s comeback with a clothesline. MVP’s cheap shot from the apron keeps Matt in trouble and it’s time for a nerve hold to keep things slow.

The running boot to the face in the corner gets two more on Matt as the beating is on in full. Miz snaps Matt’s throat across the middle rope for two and the chinlock goes on. MVP comes back in but Matt finally gets up an elbow in the corner, setting up the running bulldog. The hot tag brings in Benoit to clean house but Miz kicks off the Sharpshooter attempt. That’s fine with Benoit, who settles for the Crossface and the tap as Matt dives onto MVP.

Rating: C+. This got some time and it makes a lot of sense to put Miz in there with some talented people. Miz needs ring time and a way to get built up, with a match like this working rather well. It’s a good sign that he was able to hold up his part of the match, as the new, serious version is working much faster than I would have expected.

Finlay gives Hornswoggle a pep talk for his match with Little Boogeyman, because that’s a thing.

Jillian Hall vs. Michelle McCool

Feeling out process to start with Michelle flipping out of an early headscissors. Michelle grabs a cradle, which is in no way a reason for her to twist and contort. Jillian sends her outside and chokes away inside as the fans are not exactly interested. We hit the backbreaker for a bit before Michelle comes back with a belly to belly for two. Jillian takes her down and hits the front flip legdrop for three near falls but here is Ashley Massaro for a distraction. That’s enough for Michelle to grab a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for the pin.

Rating: D+. This is a case where you have to consider the particulars. It wasn’t a very good match, but it felt like a match. They were doing actual moves and looking fairly competent at them, which is a lot better than a series of hair pulls and brawling. You can see the women coming a long way and that’s rather impressive.

Boogeyman fires up Little Boogeyman.

Little Boogeyman vs. Hornswoggle

Boogeyman is here too. JBL: “Koko B. Ware would look like Andre the Giant in this match.” Little Boogeyman spits worms into Hornswoggle’s hat to start and then knocks Hornswoggle down. The gyrating elbow gets two and it’s time to throw worms at Hornswoggle. That’s fine with Hornswoggle, who spits mist back at Little Boogeyman.

Cue Finlay from underneath the ring to throw Little Boogeyman back inside, setting up a brawl with Boogeyman. Hornswoggle dives off the apron to hammer on Boogeyman for a weird visual, leaving Finlay to Shillelagh Little Boogeyman. Hornswoggle debuts the Tadpole Splash for the pin to end a surprisingly wild match.

Mark Henry is going to hurt Kane tonight.

Raw Rebound.

Kane vs. Mark Henry

Kane kicks him to the floor so Henry comes back in for the drive into the corner. The clubbing forearms into the running powerslam plants Kane and there’s the running splash in the corner. Henry misses a splash though and Kane drops an elbow into a legdrop for two. Kane scores with the top rope clothesline but Henry bails to the floor at the threat of a chokeslam. That’s fine with Kane, who dropkicks him through the ropes, only to get caught in a bearhug. Henry drives him hard into the post and that’s enough for the countout.

Rating: C-. This was a way to keep Henry strong while also protecting Kane for a future rematch so they covered two ideas at once. Henry is being built up as a major force on Smackdown and a big win over Kane would go a long way to get him there. This was the first step on that path so not a bad start, even if the match wasn’t great.

Post match Kane sits up and chases Henry off.

Edge isn’t scared of Batista and is ready for him on the Cutting Edge later tonight.

Deuce N Domino aren’t worried about the Draft because they aren’t going into the army and getting buzzcuts. The interviewer explains it and the champs aren’t happy.

Tag Team Titles: Brian Kendrick/Paul London vs. William Regal/Dave Taylor vs. Deuce N Domino

Deuce N Domino are defending. Regal elbows Domino in the face to start and hands it off to Taylor to uppercut Domino down. London comes into headlock Taylor before shifting to the arm, with Kendrick coming in off the top to stay on it. Taylor uppercuts his way to freedom though and it’s off to Deuce via a blind tag. That’s fine with London, who armdrags Deuce down and hands it off to Kendrick in a hurry. Taylor punches him in the face to escape (as you do) but Kendrick crossbodies him over the top for the crash to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Kendrick and Deuce slowing things back down until Kendrick has to try to skin the cat. Domino breaks that up with a kick to the ribs though and the champs take over on Kendrick. Back in and Domino grabs a cobra clutch until Taylor tags himself back in. Kendrick is tossed outside in a crash but Regal is smart enough to throw him back inside to break up the countout.

We hit the chinlock back inside with Kendrick having to put a boot on the ropes for a break. An enziguri finally gives Kendrick a breather but Regal comes back in to wreck him with a half nelson suplex (that landing was nasty). The villains get in a fight of their own though and Kendrick gets over for the tag to London. House is cleaned in a hurry but Cherry hits London with her rollerskate so Domino can steal the pin to retain the title.

Rating: B-. This got time and was enough of a different kind of match to keep things feeling fresh. You don’t see triple threat tag matches very often around here so it was nice to have something different for a change. Deuce N Domino have established themselves as champions, though I’m not sure who they are supposed to face next, as depth isn’t really a priority for the tag division.

One Night Stand rundown, including Mark Henry vs. Kane in a lumberjack match.

Teddy Long congratulates Vickie Guerrero on coming up with the lumberjack match. Kristal is worried about being Drafted to another show, but Long would give up being GM to be with her. Vickie says she would run the show in his honor if he had to leave. She even lets the two of them leave early tonight and volunteers to run the show (all ten minutes left of it) for Teddy. Sure why not.

It’s time for the Cutting Edge and Edge wastes no time in bringing out Batista as his guest. Edge makes it clear that this is not going to get physical but he isn’t scared of Batista. Maybe Batista is the one intimidated….so he takes off his jacket. He’s just a bit hot, but Edge is looking a bit scared.

Batista talks about how Edge stole the title from Undertaker but Edge says he’s the champ. Batista: “Until One Night Stand.” Edge wishes him luck, so Batista does the same and slaps him in the face. Edge says he doesn’t need it so Batista says he does and slaps Edge again. We go back and forth with YES YOU DO/NO I DON’T plus some shoving. Edge says he isn’t scared, but Batista says he should be and punched Edge down to end the show. They’re doing what they can with almost no story here and it’s going as well as can be expected.

Overall Rating: C. This show took a different path from last week in that they were trying to build things up as well as they could while also giving us a good amount of in-ring action. What we got here was entertaining enough, though I’m really looking forward to getting past Sunday and on to something fresh. For now though, it a nice go home show for a not so great looking pay per view.

 

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – May 29, 2007: The Returning Guest Star

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: May 29, 2007
Location: John Labatt Centre, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the go home show for One Night Stand and this time around, the pay per view features a big ECW match as Bobby Lashley is challenging ECW World Champion Vince McMahon in a street fight. Other than that, Randy Orton has damaged Rob Van Dam so it might be time for some extreme gloating. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Randy Orton to say he knows he isn’t making a lot of friends around here. We see a clip of Orton taking out Rob Van Dam and giving him a concussion (with a heck of a sell job from Van Dam). Back in the arena, Orton says he doesn’t feel a bit wrong about any of that because it was in a sanctioned match.

Just like Shawn Michaels, Van Dam is coming back too soon and it’s going to be a stretcher match. Orton finds that as very appropriate but here is Tommy Dreamer to interrupt. Dreamer isn’t going to let Orton come out here and gloat because this is Dreamer’s house and Orton isn’t welcome. The challenge is on for tonight with Orton saying it’s on and promising to kill the legend of ECW tonight.

CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke

No DQ. Punk grabs a headlock to start and they go to the mat with Burke’s arm in trouble. The fans want tables but have to settle for Burke striking away in the corner. Back up and Punk kicks him in the face, followed by more kicks for two. A clothesline puts Burke on the floor and we take a break. Back with Burke working on a waistlock and then choking underneath the ropes.

Burke hits a slingshot elbow to the ribs in the corner, setting up a flapjack to stay on the bad ribs. A table is set up in the corner but Punk uses the delay to score with an enziguri for two. Punk hits the running knee in the corner but the bulldog is broken up. Back up and Punk kicks him in the head and the GTS is loaded up, only to have Marcus Cor Von come in for the save. The Pounce puts Punk through the table and Burke gets the pin.

Rating: C+. I know it’s a basic move, but my goodness there is something cool about watching Cor Von hit that Pounce. This was a lot of logical rib work until the ending, which played into the (or what is left of the) New Breed’s numbers game. Punk is protected and the New Breed looks like more of a threat for the pay per view tables match.

Vince McMahon joins us to mock Joey Styles’ and Tazz’s names, thinking they sound like a 12 year old boy and a gargoyle respectively. That’s not as bad as the name Loser though, which is enough for Vince to bring in Bobby Lashley. Vince thinks Lashley is awfully calm before Sunday, but Lashley says it’s because he has an easy match coming up. Lashley stays calm no matter how insulting Vince gets and eventually says Vince has never had to work for anything in his life.

THAT sets Vince off so he threatens Lashley some more, with Lashley not really worrying about anything. Granted Vince getting the show’s name wrong (“Last Night Stand”) probably doesn’t help. Lashley finally starts promising to win and calls Vince old as this is REALLY not Lashley’s strong suit. It’s an all time kind of not being intimidating and this kind of killed the interest I had in the match.

We look at Randy Orton injuring Rob Van Dam again.

Extreme Expose.

Kevin Thorn vs. Balls Mahoney

Thorn hammers away to start and fishhooks Mahoney to make it worst. A whip sends Mahoney shoulder first into the post, setting up Original Sin for the easy pin.

Matt Striker comes up to the Major Brothers in the back and, after suggesting that Rob Van Dam is….a tuskless elephant, brings up the Draft. It can change careers, but the Brothers talk about beating Striker in their first match. That’s enough for Striker, who issues the challenge for next week.

Randy Orton vs. Tommy Dreamer

Believe it or not, Dreamer is fighting for someone he cares about. Feeling out process to start, with Orton taking him down into a headlock. A dropkick puts Dreamer on the floor so Orton goes up top, only to get superplexed back down. Dreamer slugs away and gets two off a jackknife cover. There’s a sitout spinebuster for two on Orton, who is tied in the Tree of Woe for the running basement dropkick. Not that it matters as the RKO (Joey: “Out of nowhere! Out of nowhere!”) finishes Dreamer in a hurry.

Rating: C-. This was more angle advancement than a match, as Dreamer was there to get beaten up as they continue his path of destruction. That is not a bad thing as Dreamer can take some great beatings, but there is only so much you are going to get out of something like this. Granted they did it the right way by having the match stay short, so it could have been a lot worse.

Post match Orton hits another RKO, followed by the Punt. Cue Rob Van Dam in street clothes but Orton knocks him down again, giving us more concussed Van Dam to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It’s kind of weird to see ECW playing such a prominent role in a pay per view, even if it is the ECW pay per view (or at least it used to be). This built up three matches on the way to the pay per view and did a nice enough job, though the stories are kind of played out at this point. Passable show though and that’s what it needed to be for Sunday.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 28, 2007: Prom Monsters?

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 28, 2007
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 16,176
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the start of a big week in WWE as we have the three regular TV shows, plus a special Saturday Night’s Main Event and One Night Stand this weekend. That makes this show week the go home show for Sunday, which doesn’t need a lot more set up but maybe they have something good planned. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

It’s Memorial Day, so we get the tribute to the fallen soldiers, including Taps.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Candice Michelle, Mickie James, Maria, Jillian Hall, Layla, Brooke, Kelly Kelly, Michelle McCool, Kristal, Melina

Non-title and it’s a Bikini Beach Blast battle royal, meaning they’re all in bikinis with water guns and pool toys. Melina gets attacked (with the water guns and pool toys) to start and then the water balloons are brought out. Kelly seems to have to adjust her top as the fans want puppies. Kristal is thrown out (through the ropes, because over the top is too much for this kind of match) and there goes Brooke as we slow down for various “weapon” shots. There goes Maria and it’s time to weakly hit each other with pool noodles. Layla is tossed as Lawler says he can’t stand up at the moment.

McCool pours a bucket of water over Kelly, who seems to like it, and then tosses her out. Melina and Jillian go after Mickie and hit her with a water gun for the elimination. Jillian dumps Candice and we’re down to Jillian, Melina and McCool. The villains put McCool on the mat and stretch her by the limbs but she gets back up and clotheslines them down (JR: “Now that’ll knock the barbecue sauce right off of you!”). McCool throws Jillian out and hits a dropkick, but since Melina can’t fall through the ropes, she drops down and rolls out to give McCool the win.

Rating: D. I get it, but my goodness this stuff is cringe. This match actually got about six minutes so Lawler could lose his mind about a thousand times, which got as annoying as you would imagine. There are obvious reasons to put this stuff on TV but egads it does not exactly hold up well.

Here is Shane McMahon to announce that this is the unofficial start of summer. That put some excitement in the air and that is the case in WWE as well. In two weeks, we will be having the first ever tri-branded WWE Draft, featuring Raw, Smackdown and ECW. Any superstar, champion, legend and even leprechaun can be drafted to any show.

Change is inevitable, save for the case of Vince McMahon. At One Night Stand, Vince is going to beat Bobby Lashley, so tonight Shane is going to do the same, as Lashley teams with John Cena against Shane, Umaga and the Great Khali. Tonight, Lashley is finding out what they call Shane the Money. Dancing ensues.

Hardys/Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team/Johnny Nitro/Kenny Dykstra

Nitro and Cade start things off with Cade elbowing him in the face to take over early. It’s off to Matt to take Shelton into the corner so Jeff can come in for the first cover. A dropkick to the back of the seated Benjamin lets Matt come back in for the middle rope elbow as this is one sided so far. Haas comes in for a change and gets thrown into the corner for some elbows from Cade and Murdoch.

As JR suggests that the Hardys, as in the champions, are the real World’s Greatest Tag Team, Haas and Benjamin are sent outside for a huge dive from Murdoch to blow Lawler’s mind (Lawler: “IT WAS LIKE A FLYING COW!”). We take a break and come back with Jeff hitting the Whisper in the Wind to Dykstra but Benjamin gets in a kick to the head to take over. Dykstra hits a heck of a clothesline for two, setting up a backbreaker. Nitro adds a slingshot elbow and Matt has to come in for the save.

Benjamin kicks Jeff in the face for two and we hit the chinlock with a bodyscissors. It’s back to Haas for a belly to belly suplex and a chinlock as we hear that One Night Stand will be all extreme rules matches. Dykstra grabs his own chinlock and bites Jeff in the head for a bonus. That’s enough to get Jeff to jawbreak his way to freedom and the diving tag brings Matt back in. A double DDT (one regular, one reverse) plants Nitro and Dykstra as everything breaks down. The Twist of Fate into the Swanton finishes Dykstra as Lawler can’t believe Cade and Murdoch didn’t turn on the Hardys.

Rating: B-. This was one of those matches that helps move things forward while keeping things fresh. You have so many people in the match that you can have a few pairings you don’t usually get while also solidifying Cade and Murdoch’s face turn (or at least what feels like one for the time being). Good stuff here, which shouldn’t be a surprise given the talent involved.

Post match Benjamin says the Hardys didn’t pin he and Haas, so the challenge is on for One Night Stand. Matt says it’s on, and we’ll make it a ladder match, because of course they will.

Wrestlemania is coming to Orlando.

John Cena reiterates that he is not scared of the Great Khali and would say…..some weird noises to the Punjabi Frankenstein. That’s translated to Cena still not being afraid but he is neither deaf nor invincible. While he isn’t scared, he isn’t sure if he can do the impossible. Yes he made Khali tap, but there was doubt over whether he won or lost.

You can throw out the submissions at One Night Stand because Cena is going to have to put Great Khali on his shoulders and throw him down for the three seconds. Cena isn’t sure if he can do that but he takes great pride in silencing his critics. At One Night Stand, Cena can and he will. This was classic Cena, as he mocked Khali at first, then told the story of the match and brought the fired up promo.

Santino Marella is excited for the Draft and Maria laughs at his accent, which yes, is Italian. He asks if Maria is ok from the battle royal and they seem interested in each other. With Santino gone, Randy Orton pops up to talk about Rob Van Dam. It seems that Van Dam is not happy with Orton injuring Shawn Michaels, but that was one of the highlights of Orton’s career. He felt bad about injuring Shawn, but he won’t about hurting Van Dam.

Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam

They go with the grappling to start as Orton grabs a headlock and blocks a top wristlock attempt. An armdrag frustrates Orton and Van Dam uses his legs to grab a rollup for two. A monkey flip sends Orton flying and there’s a kick to the head. They head outside with Orton getting the better of a slugout, setting up the big dropkick off the top and into the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Orton working on the chinlock. Orton pulls him down by the hair to cut off a comeback attempt and it’s time for the circle stomp. Another chinlock is broken up again and Van Dam hits the springboard kick to the face for the double knockdown. Van Dam is up first and kicks him down again, setting up Rolling Thunder.

Orton’s poke to the eye just earns him a step over kick to the face but Van Dam is a little shaky as he goes up top. Van Dam kicks him off the apron but comes back in with the hanging DDT for two. The referee stops to check on Van Dam, who can’t get up to his feet and looks gone. The Punt connects and the referee calls the match as Van Dam is out of it.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of violent Orton that can make for some good stuff as he can be absolutely lethal when he is given the chance. Taking out Michaels and Van Dam in short succession is pretty impressive and should set him up for something else later. Having Van Dam’s facials make it seem like he had been hit in the head with a boulder made this even better.

Post match Orton hits the RKO to make it worse.

Ric Flair/Torrie Wilson vs. Carlito/Victoria

Leave it to Flair to wind up with Torrie out of the whole thing. Flair takes Carlito into the corner to start the chopping but it’s off to Victoria to slap Flair in the face. Lawler: “Lay it on her! She wants it!” Flair takes her down and tries the Figure Four, with Carlito having to make the save. It’s back to Carlito to stomp away at the head and leg, setting up the half crab. Victoria hits Carlito by mistake though and Torrie gets to come in and take over. An X Factor gets two with Carlito making the save. Carlito comes in, kisses Torrie, and hits the Backstabber for the pin (JR: “I KNOW IT’S LEGAL BUT I DON’T LIKE IT!”).

Rating: D+. This feud is running out of gas in a hurry as Carlito has yet to make me believe he is a real threat to Flair. They have fought each other a few times now and it has yet to be anything better than just ok. Both guys need to move on already, as Flair can find something better to do and Carlito can find a good haircut.

Shane McMahon has to break up an argument between Great Khali and Umaga. Shane: “Worst prom couple ever.” He tells them to take out John Cena and Bobby Lashley, but make sure he gets the pin.

One Night Stand/Saturday Night’s Main Event rundowns, edited off of Peacock due to Puddle of Mud.

It’s time for the Kiss Cam with Maria but Chris Masters interrupts. He wants Santino Marella to take the Masterlock Challenge. Masters threatens Maria so cue Marella for the brawl, which ends in the Masterlock. This has been a very Maria frequent show.

Shane McMahon/Umaga/Great Khali vs. John Cena/Bobby Lashley

Umaga sends Cena into the corner to start but misses a charge. Cena scores with the Throwback for a fast two but he gets thrown into the corner to start the hammering. There are the LET’S GO CENA/CENA SUCKS chants as Khali kicks Cena in the head. Shane comes in to stomp away and it’s Umaga getting in some right hands. The Samoan drop gives Umaga a delayed two and Khali drops a leg.

Now Shane is willing to stick around for the bodyscissors and shots to the back of Cena’s head to make things worse. That’s broken up with the ProtoBomb and it’s Lashley coming in to pick up the pace. Lashley runs Umaga over but can’t slam Khali as everything breaks down. The Samoan Spike puts Cena down on the floor and there’s the chokeslam to Lashley. Shane’s top rope elbow hits Lashley for the pin.

Rating: C. Just a quick way to bring in as many people as you can for the main event, which went well enough. Shane getting to gloat works well, as Lashley can shut up either Shane or Vince McMahon to even things up. The match was pretty immaterial, but it isn’t like losing to Umaga and Khali is a big defeat. Lashley didn’t do much until the end but it worked out fine.

Vince McMahon comes out to celebrate with the villains to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It was better than last week but not by much. This did a good enough job of making me want to see the Raw half of One Night Stand, as they are betting on the gimmicks and stipulations to make the show work. That’s about all you can do at this point in the cycle of feuds so at least they’re going with the smartest route possible.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 25, 2007: The Bridge Show

Smackdown
Date: May 25, 2007
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re done with Judgment Day and now we have less than two weeks to go before One Night Stand. Edge cheated to defeat Batista and retain the Smackdown World Title so we might be in for a rematch at the next pay per view. I’m not sure what else we’ll be getting but building to a low level pay per view can be rough. Let’s get to it.

Here is Judgment Day if you need a recap.

The opening video, set to Ozzy Osborne’s I Don’t Wanna Stop, looks at Edge becoming World Heavyweight Champion, and retaining against Batista on Sunday.

Here is Edge to get things going. Edge talks about the praise Batista vs. Undertaker has been receiving but where did it get them? Nowhere, other than leaving them vulnerable for the Ultimate Opportunist. Edge beat Undertaker and Batista 1-2-3 and here he is as the World Heavyweight Champion. This is the Rated R Era and it DOES NOT SUCK, despite what the fans say. Cue Teddy Long to announce a #1 contenders match for tonight, with Kane vs. Finlay vs. Mark Henry vs. Batista. Edge can go with that, but Teddy ups the ante by putting the title match inside a steel cage.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. William Regal/Dave Taylor

Hold on though as here are Deuce N Domino and Cherry to watch from their car. Taylor headlocks Kendrick down to start but gets monkey flipped for his effort. A dropkick puts Taylor on the floor but he counters a headscissors into a toss out to the floor. Regal comes in to fire off some knees to the face (simple yet effective), setting up the wishbone split. Kendrick manages to dodge a shot though and the hot tag brings in London to clean house. A spinwheel kick drops Regal but Domino shoves London off the top for the DQ.

Rating: C. London and Kendrick vs. Deuce N Domino needs to go far away but I’ll take this over half of a team vs. half of a team. Regal and Taylor are the kind of team who can always have a place on the roster as you can always use some brawlers. This was a perfectly fine match and that’s all they could hope for with so little time.

Post match the big brawl is on.

We look back at Randy Orton injuring Shawn Michaels at Judgment Day.

Hornswoggle has stolen the World Heavyweight Title and Edge is giving chase. They run into Finlay, who makes Hornswoggle give it back to Edge, for now.

Jillian Hall is singing in the ring when Boogeyman, with full entrance, comes out but she somehow doesn’t notice him until he’s in the ring. Jillian bails but Michelle McCool throws her back in for the worming.

Teddy Long officially makes Vickie Guerrero his assistant and she’s rather happy. Vickie leaves and Krystal offers to thank Teddy for his decision.

Matt Hardy vs. Miz

Feeling out process to start with JBL ranting about how evil the Guerreros are. Miz elbows his way out of a hammerlock and bends Matt’s neck around the rope. The cravate goes on and Hardy can’t even roll his way to freedom. An elbow drop misses but Miz is fine enough to pull him down by the hair for two more.

Matt fights up with forearms to the face but gets caught with the running corner clothesline for another near fall. The chinlock goes on so Matt fights up with right hands and the clothesline. Matt’s middle rope elbow gets two and the Side Effect is good for the same. A right hand sets up the Twist of Fate (which Miz takes like a swinging neckbreaker) for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a perfectly basic but nicely done match and I’ll absolutely take that. Above all else, Miz looked WAY more comfortable in there, even if Matt was probably walking him through every step. That’s why you put him in there with a veteran like Hardy. Well done here, and one of Miz’s most impressive performances, just because of how big a step forward it seemed to be.

Mark Henry is ready to hurt people and wants the World Title match at One Night Stand.

Here is MVP for his United States Championship celebration. In quite a few words, MVP says he told us so and now he’s right here as US Champion. Then he just flat out says “I told you so”. There is one thing missing from this celebration, so here is Chris Benoit to look really serious. MVP sticks out his hand and Benoit gives him a very firm shake but MVP goes into a bragging speech about beating Benoit two straight falls. Now he wants Benoit to raise his hand because he is better than Benoit on any given day. Instead it’s some rolling German suplexes to send MVP bailing.

We look at John Cena surviving against Great Khali at Judgment Day.

Maryse throws us to the Throw It On Me video.

Kane promises to win tonight.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title. Yang takes him into the corner to start but Chavo slips away for a standoff. They fight over arm control until Chavo takes him down, only to get reversed into a headlock. Back up and Chavo dropkicks the knee out and starts cranking away on the leg. Yang fights up but gets pulled down into a stretch muffler. Make that a half crab as Chavo is at least mixing things up a bit. Back up and Yang hits an enziguri to start the comeback in a hurry. Chavo manages to grab the Three Amigos but the frog splash is broken up. Yang gets knocked away so Chavo tries a sunset bomb, which is reversed into a hurricanrana for the pin.

Rating: C-. I don’t care. This is the same thing that WWE has done for the better part of ever with this title and it isn’t going to change a freaking thing. The champ loses to set up a title match where the title is retained and it is forgotten days later as we start the whole thing over again. Both guys are completely acceptable in the ring but this is the most tired and played out idea WWE has had in years.

Batista promises to win.

Batista vs. Mark Henry vs. Finlay vs. Kane

The winner gets a title shot against Edge, on commentary, at One Night Stand in a cage. It’s a brawl to start with Batista and Henry fighting on the floor as the other two stay inside. We take a break and come back with everyone in the ring again until Kane and Finlay head outside. That leaves Henry to hit a quick World’s Strongest Slam on Batista with Finlay making the same.

Kane goes up top for a clothesline to put Henry down and Batista’s top rope shoulder hits Henry as well. That’s still not enough to keep Henry down as he fights up and hammers on Kane. Batista drops Henry and spinebusters Kane but Henry is back up again. Finlay is back in and cleans house with the Shillelagh but Batista is fine enough to hit the Batista Bomb for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C+. Take four monsters (or at least a good brawler in Finlay’s case) and have them hit each other over and over again. That’s what we got here and it was a solid way to set up the rematch. Batista had to get around Henry and the Shillelagh, plus the always dangerous Kane to get back at Edge. It feels like he had to do something here and the match worked.

Batista stares down at Edge to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Much like Raw, this felt like a bridge between pay per views, neither of which was all that important in the first place. The wrestling was mostly ok at best and they set things up, but it isn’t like any of this felt important. They need to get done with One Night Stand so we can move on to something fresh, because this crop of stories is pretty much out of gas.

 

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – May 22, 2007: The Slower End

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: May 22, 2007
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

Things are staying interesting around here as we have the continuing issues between Bobby Lashley and ECW World Champion Vince McMahon. Their next showdown is set for One Night Stand, but we have a little time to cover before we get there. In addition, CM Punk is rising up through the ranks and seems ready to break through to the other side. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Snitsky vs. Tommy Dreamer

Snitsky powers him around to start and hits an elbow to the jaw in the corner. A hard toss sends Dreamer outside and he seems to have banged up his shoulder. Back in and the shoulder is sent into the post (THUD) and we hit a front facelock of all things. Snitsky misses a legdrop though and Dreamer grabs a DDT for two of his own. Dreamer goes up top but dives into a clothesline. The big boot finishes Dreamer in a hurry.

Rating: C-. This is all it needed to be as there was no reason to believe Snitsky was going to be in trouble against Dreamer. Snitsky is the local monster and having him beat down Dreamer is a good way to keep him moving up. At the same time though, there is only so much that you’re going to get out of a match like this. The result was fine, but it was a little dull to get there.

Post match Snitsky grabs a chair but Rob Van Dam makes the save with a Van Daminator.

We recap Bobby Lashley beating Vince McMahon and company at Judgment Day but not winning the title due to not pinning Vince.

Here is Extreme Expose to introduce the new music video for Timbaland’s Throw It On Me.

Kevin Thorn vs. Wyatt Laura

Ariel is gone with no explanation (commentary isn’t likely to mention someone being released) but Thorn unloads on Laura anyway. A running kick to the head sets up the Original Sin for the fast pin.

Elijah Burke is excited to team with Marcus Cor Von tonight because Cor Von can get it done. That’s different from Matt Striker, who better beat one of the Major Brothers tonight, or things will go bad. Cor Von also suggests Striker win.

Matt Striker vs. Brett Major

Brian (Curt Hawkins) Major is at ringside. Brett works on the arm to start but Striker quickly takes him down into a cravate. A sunset flip gives Brett two so Striker blasts him with a clothesline and the cravate goes on again. Brett comes back with a small package and Thesz press for two each, only to have Striker hit the Golden Rule. A rolling neckbreaker finishes Brett off.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t quite a squash but it also wasn’t the most interesting match. Striker is a good talker and has a punchable face, but that doesn’t mean I want to see him have matches. The Major Brothers have been a nice addition to the show and certainly seem a bit better than your usual run of jobbers.

We look at Bobby Lashley successfully running the gauntlet to earn an ECW World Title shot at One Night Stand.

Rob Van Dam/CM Punk vs. Marcus Cor Von/Elijah Burke

Punk has banged up ribs coming in, and the fans are very behind Van Dam. Cor Von shoulders Van Dam down with straight power to start and then does it again for a bonus. Back up and Van Dam hits a running clothesline so it’s off to Burke to hammer away. A rollup gets Van Dam out of trouble and it’s off to Punk for the springboard clothesline. We take a break and come back with Cor Von working on Van Dam’s knee.

Burke pulls on a leglock and drives a knee into Van Dam’s knee for two. Cor Von actually takes him down with a drop toehold and Burke rubs Van Dam face first into the mat. A kneebar keeps Van Dam in trouble until Cor Von hands it back to Burke, who gets enziguried. The hot tag brings in Punk, who cleans house on Burke. Cor Von comes in sans tag though and it’s the Pounce to Punk, which is enough for a DQ.

Rating: C. Kind of a dull tag match with a long stretch of the New Breed working on Van Dam’s knee. The ending was a good way to make Cor Von look like a monster but that wasn’t the most thrilling way to wrap things up. This felt like a way to stretch things out without actually doing anything, which is fine enough for a one off, but they’ll need to find a way to finish off New Breed sooner than later.

Post match Cor Von Pounces Van Dam as well, allowing the New Breed to stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t exactly the most thrilling show as you can tell nothing really matters until we get done with Lashley vs. Vince at One Night Stand. It was far from the worst show, but it was certainly dull, which is often worse. Just get us to the stuff that matters and then we can see where this show can really go in the future.

 

 

 

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