ECW On Sci Fi – March 4, 2008: They Need To Pull Over

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 4, 2008
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re still on the Road to Wrestlemania and somehow, again, we’re getting CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero for the latter’s ECW Title. This is setting a new standard for trying to squeeze every last drop out of an idea and there absolutely cannot be much left to wring out of the feud. Maybe tonight can wrap it up for good. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at the last month or so of CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero, because the feud is so long that you can trim it down like that.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Colin Delaney/Tommy Dreamer

Delaney and Dreamer are challenging after beating the champs in a non-title match last week. Dreamer and Miz start things off with Miz being taken down rather quickly. A Quebecers’ Cannonball hits Miz for two but he’s right back up to drive Delaney into the corner. Morrison comes in for the springboard spinning kick to the head but Delaney manages to kick him away.

The tag brings in Dreamer to a rather nothing reaction and a neckbreaker out of the corner for one on Morrison. The Texas Cloverleaf goes on but Miz makes the save, knocks Delaney to the floor and hammers Dreamer down. That’s too far for Delaney, who grabs a chair and cleans house for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Yeah this wasn’t much to see and that’s because there was no way the titles were going to change here. Delaney and Dreamer are some teacher/student deal and it is getting better over the weeks, but that doesn’t mean they were ready to become champions. Points for making someone new though, which has been lacking around here for a good bit.

Post match Dreamer looks stunned but also rather pleased with the violence. Ignore Delaney costing them the title shot.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Stevie Richards

Benjamin’s original Ain’t No Stopping Me Now music is gone, taking away one of the catchier themes from the era. Richards grabs a headlock to start but Benjamin pulls him out of the air for a shoulder breaker to take over. An armbar and them a figure four arm lock (Tazz’s words) keep Richards in trouble.

Benjamin elbows him in the face and grabs the same arm lock as things grind to another halt. Back up and Benjamin jumps to the top, only to miss a high crossbody. We get some weak SHELTON chants as Richards makes the comeback, including an enziguri for two. That’s too far for Benjamin, who hits the jumping Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as interesting as Benjamin working the arm for two minutes out of less than five was going to be. The new Benjamin is just so lame with the gold hair and the weaker music, but at least they’re pushing someone who still has some star power. Also, so much for Richards’ push, but I don’t know what kinds of legs it had in the first place.

Post match Benjamin promises to win Money In The Bank.

We recap the reveal of Maria’s Playboy cover.

Kofi Kingston and Kelly Kelly are admiring the Playboy cover, with Kingston saying she could be a Playboy cover girl. With that kind of creepy line out of the way, Layla comes in to yell at Kelly about Playboy wanting Layla instead. Catfighting ensues, likely over who could be a worse actress.

Kane vs. James Gibson

Before the match, Chuck Palumbo, who is facing Kane on Smackdown, rides to the ring on his motorcycle. Not that it matters as the chokeslam finishes Gibson in about thirty seconds.

Raw Rebound.

CM Punk talks about how Chavo Guerrero claims to be a warrior, but there is one Guerrero who is a warrior and it isn’t Chavo. Punk talks about the things he’s done to Chavo and promises to regain the title tonight.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero is defending. Feeling out process to start as Chavo takes him into the corner, only to get rolled up for a fast two. A hammerlock slam sets up an armbar from Punk, which is quickly reversed into a headlock. With that broken up, Punk tries a springboard but gets knocked out to the floor in a pretty nasty crash.

We take a break and come back with Chavo working on the leg, including a chop block to cut him down again. The leg is wrapped around the post and Chavo seems rather confident. We hit the leg crank but Punk manages to use the good leg to kick Chavo outside. Back in and Punk grabs an armbar, only to have Chavo pull him into a half crab. The rope is grabbed so Chavo plants him with a tornado DDT for two instead. Punk catches him going up but gets knocked back down, setting up the frog splash to retain the title.

Rating: C+. They’re done now right? Chavo has beaten Punk multiple times now and this one was completely clean so the feud is over. There is nothing left for these two to do with each other and it is time for both of them to move on. I’m not sure what that will mean for Chavo, but Punk is more than ready to move up to one of the other shows.

Overall Rating: C. This show is in need of a fresh tank of gas as they seem to be running on empty. Miz and Morrison vs. Delaney and Dreamer is the second biggest story on the show and that has the shelf life of some week old bread. Other than that, you have Benjamin minus the fun stuff and Kane warmed up for something on Smackdown. What does that leave for this show? Decent main event this week and nothing else.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – March 3, 2008: Are You Smarter Than A Snitsky?

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 3, 2008
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s finally Wrestlemania month and we are less than four weeks away from the show. The big story around here is the triple threat match between Raw World Champion Randy Orton and challengers HHH and John Cena. Other than that, we’re going to be seeing Big Show vs. a professional fighter, because wrestlers are…tap dancers or something. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Randy Orton, John Cena and HHH are in William Regal’s office and has a great idea: for the next three weeks, one of them will be in charge every week. Tonight it’s Cena, but Orton thinks they should have a pact that says the other two should get the night off every week. Cena has a better idea.

Opening sequence.

Big Show vs. Brandon Hill

This is billed as MMA (win by pin/submission/knockout), as Hill is a boxer and Floyd Mayweather Jr. is watching live from Las Vegas (I’m sure). We get the showdown, with Show towering over the rather small Hill, and in a rare production gaffe, you see the cameramen in the ring (I don’t know if that’s a choice for the match, but it feels WAY out of place in WWE). Hill runs away to start and then panics when Show grabs him by the trunks. Then the chokeslam finishes for Show fast.

Post match Show calls out Mayweather and promises to ruin him at Wrestlemania. Mayweather pops up on screen to yell about how he’ll break Show’s jaw. Oh and he’s coming to the show. Then Show tosses Hill over the top for a nasty landing.

Video on HHH.

Shawn Michaels/Ric Flair vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Flair and Murdoch start things off, with Flair sending him into the corner for some right hands. Shawn comes in for an awkward collision with Murdoch, allowing Cade to grab a belly to back suplex. An atomic drop/big boot combination gets two on Shawn but he gets a boot up to stop a diving Murdoch. It’s back to Flair to strike away, setting up the stereo Figure Fours for the stereo submissions.

Rating: C. Just a quick, nothing match here with Flair and Shawn getting to spend some time together with Wrestlemania on the way. We still have some more weeks for them to be nice to each other before they get personal, which still feels like a bit of a stretch. Cade and Murdoch’s fall continues, as they are now about as worthless as they could be. Because tag teams.

Post match Shawn says he doesn’t want to be the one who ends Flair’s career. He knows Flair is thinking “what makes Shawn think he’s that guy”, but it’s Wrestlemania and he’s Shawn Michaels. At Wrestlemania, Flair’s show is going to be stopped.

John Cena comes in to see William Regal and gets right to the point: tonight it’s Randy Orton vs. HHH, while Cena will face Mr. Kennedy. Oh and since Cena is in charge, Regal can leave the office.

Umaga vs. Super Crazy

William Regal is on commentary as Umaga wins with the Samoan Spike in less than 45 seconds.

Here is Chris Jericho for the return of the Highlight Reel. Jericho talks about how this is the talk show that inspired the others, such as Are You Smarter Than A Snitsky and Cooking With Goldberg. For now though, let’s get our guest out there: Jeff Hardy. Jericho shows us a clip of him beating Hardy last week to qualify for Money In The Bank, even though Hardy is already in there. Of course fans are expecting Hardy to steal the show, but this time Hardy talks about how important it is for him to win here. Then Hardy lays him out with the Twist of Fate.

Mr. Kennedy vs. John Cena

Kennedy’s headlock doesn’t do much to start as Cena is right back with a backdrop. We take a break about thirty seconds in (erg) and come back with Kennedy bailing to the floor, meaning the chase is on. Kennedy snaps him throat first across the top rope to take over, setting up a hard ram into the apron. Back in and Kennedy hits a neckbreaker onto the knee for two, followed by the cravate to stay on the neck. Cena powers out and hits the running clotheslines into the top rope Fameasser. The STFU finishes Kennedy off.

Rating: C+. They didn’t have much time here and that commercial was quite the waste of time. Cena gets some revenge to make up for the night where he was hurt in October so a thread is tied up. I’m not sure how many people were wanting it to be tied up, but getting Cena in the ring on Raw is often a good idea and having him win here without much drama over the winner worked fine.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring to emcee the unveiling of Maria’s Playboy cover. Maria and Candice Michelle come out, the cover is unveiled…and Santino Marella has censored it. Cue Santino to complain about Maria being in the magazine, Maria yells at him and Lawler clears him out. The real cover is revealed, Lawler is excited and that’s it. So why did they have the other version ready (a giant banner above the ring) when they were surprised that Santino had messed with the poster size one?

John Cena was at a NASCAR race.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Carlito vs. Cody Rhodes

Cody’s headlock doesn’t go very far to start but he does get two off a backslide. Back up and Carlito sends him into the corner for some shots to the face but the Backstabber misses. A middle rope spinning crossbody gives Cody two and a sunset flip is good for the same. Cody tries a victory roll but Carlito reverses into a backstabber for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was quick and to the point, with Carlito qualifying for a match he has no chance of winning. Cody isn’t going to win it either and is way too early in his career to be there either, so maybe just not having these two in a match for a spot would have been better. It’s good to get Cody in the ring, but Carlito means nothing at this point and that isn’t easy to hide.

We get a satellite interview with Floyd Mayweather Jr., who brags about how awesome he is and how he is ready to dominate WWE. He’s ready to break Big Show’s jaw and declares himself the real king, much to Lawler’s….well I’d assume annoyance, but Mayweather promises to turn the company into Money Mayweather Entertainment so we don’t get much of a reaction.

Mae Young is going into the Hall of Fame, meaning we get quite the entertaining video package.

Here is Finlay to confront JBL after Hornswoggle was attacked last week. For now though, here is Vince McMahon to interrupt, with Vince confirming that he is NOT Hornswoggle’s father, but Finlay certainly is. JBL isn’t here, but we do have him via satellite….from Hornswoggle’s hospital room. JBL says it’s fun to prey on the innocent and the challenge to face Finlay is thrown out for Wrestlemania. Then JBL turns out the lights and we hear Hornswoggle screaming. That was an intense scene and JBL is kind of perfect for it, but they rushed through it so fast that it didn’t have quite the impact.

HHH vs. Randy Orton

Non-title and John Cena is on commentary. Orton takes him into the corner to start and we get a clean….stare at each other. HHH does the same thing but punches Orton in the face, which fits him rather well. Some headlock takeovers from HHH are broken up by Orton’s headscissors as Cena talks about everything Orton did to his father.

Orton grabs the backbreaker as the fans are rather behind HHH. The circle stomping ensues until HHH is back up with the facebuster. They fight to the floor with HHH hammering away, setting up the spinebuster back inside. Orton bails to the floor and grabs the title so Cena breaks it up, only to have HHH knock both of them over. Cena comes in and jumps HHH for the DQ.

Rating: C. They didn’t have much time to do anything here and the match was more about sitting around waiting on Cena to do something to end things. That’s likely what we are going to be seeing for a few weeks to come and that is not the worst idea. The idea is to make fans want to see Wrestlemania and little teases like this could make that be the case.

Post match Cena gives HHH the FU but walks into the RKO so Orton can stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. You can definitely feel a similar style of build to Wrestlemania on Raw and Smackdown. The main event is the huge focal point with one other big match per show announced. This week saw JBL vs. Finlay all but set up and when you throw in Umaga vs. Batista and Money in the Bank, the core of the show is ready. This week’s show was just ok, but the build to Wrestlemania is what matters most and that is going rather well.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 29, 2008: When Great Khali Has Match Of The Night

Smackdown
Date: February 29, 2008
Location: Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona
Attendance: 5,200
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We are just over a month away from Wrestlemania XXIV and most of the top of the card is set. That means that the following weeks can be for a mixture of firming up the main events and building up the lower half of the card. That can include quite a few things and we’ll start this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at the Wrestlemania press conference.

Opening sequence.

Big Show vs. Joey Ryans/Jay Garland

Ryans is….well I think you can guess and this is Show’s first WWE match in over a year. We hear about Show wanting to be a boxer but not being able to get anyone to take his fights. Garland gets chokeslammed and Ryans gets punched in the corner. A right hand knocks Ryans silly for the easy pin.

Post match Show talks about how Floyd Mayweather Jr. may be facing Oscar de la Hoya in September. It’s just a rumor, and Show is here to stop that rumor. Show is going to break everything in Mayweather, including his spirit. There isn’t going to be a Mayweather vs. de la Hoya fight, but Show vs. de la Hoya is possible. That $20 million that Mayweather is getting for the Wrestlemania match (right) isn’t going to be enough for the pain he’ll be experiencing.

Deuce N Domino vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Yang and Domino get things going with Domino missing an elbow drop so Yang can grab a headlock. Moore comes in and gets hit in the face a few times before headscissoring Domino into the corner. Back up and Domino sends Moore HARD out to the floor (that was a scary landing), setting up something like a seated abdominal stretch back inside.

Commentary argues about old westerns and whether Asians can be rednecks (oh dear) as Domino pulls Moore down by the hair and knocks Yang off the apron. Not that it matters as the hot tag goes through a few seconds later, with Yang getting to clean a few rooms. The moonsault press misses though and Cherry pulls Moore off the apron. That leaves Yang to slip out of a belly to back suplex and now the moonsault press can connect for the pin on Deuce.

Rating: C. I’m glad to see Yang and Moore sticking around a bit longer, as they have been a rather nice little bright spot between here and ECW. I’m not sure what that is going to mean for them in the long term, but at least they are doing something for the time being. Deuce N Domino….yeah how long were you expecting a greaser gimmick to last? Maybe having them actually do something as champions might have helped.

Edge and Vickie Guerrero make honeymoon plans, with Edge thinking Canada. Vickie loves Canadians but the Edgeheads interrupt their romance. That’s ok with Edge, who sends Zack Ryder after Undertaker tonight.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Jamie Noble

Yes, AGAIN and Michelle McCool is here with Noble. Palumbo misses a charge into the corner and Noble strikes away before pulling on an armbar over the ropes. Back up and Palumbo dumps him to the floor without much effort but a McCool distraction breaks up whatever Palumbo has planned (probably some kind of wrestling move).

They head back inside with Palumbo hitting an overhead belly to belly superplex for two, leaving Palumbo stunned. Noble manages a Fujiwara armbar until the rope is grabbed, allowing Palumbo to hit a hard slam. An enziguri sends Palumbo into the corner for a Cannonball but he rakes Noble’s eyes across the top. The Overdrive finishes Noble off.

Rating: C. The more I watch these matches the more I believe WWE has just forgotten where they were going with the story but keep it going for lack of anything better for the two of them. Palumbo is still his old, not that interesting self and now Noble, who has been the good guy in the whole thing, is a loser. What else is there for these two to do? And it isn’t like McCool has gained anything either, making this quite the waste of time.

Vickie Guerrero is in the back with Teddy Long and Maryse, with the latter praising Vickie until Batista comes in. Batista has heard about this Raw vs. Smackdown challenge and wants to face Umaga. Maryse likes the idea (and maybe Batista) so Vickie sets the match.

Batista/Kane vs. MVP/Great Khali

Feels like they pressed the random button in Smackdown vs. Raw. Kane and Khali start things off with Khali pounding him into the corner. MVP comes in and gets backdropped, setting up the basement dropkick, which always feels weird from Kane. It’s off to Batista, who charges into an elbow in the corner.

Kane is right back in to big boot MVP down for two as commentary thinks we’ll be talking about the recent Elimination Chamber match for years to come. I wouldn’t get my hopes up on that one. The spinebuster plants MVP but Khali breaks up the Batista Bomb as we take an early break.

Back with Khali shoving Batista down and sending him outside without much trouble. Khali runs him over again back inside and actually covers for two, showing more mobility than usual. Batista gets over for the tag off to Kane to fire off on Khali in the corner. This lasts all of five seconds before Khali knocks him backwards. MVP comes in so Kane grabs him by the throat, earning a chop from Khali on the apron (makes sense).

The cravate doesn’t hold Kane down for very long as he powers up and slams MVP down for a breather. MVP cuts him off with a kick to the head though as this heat is getting some time. Kane finally knocks MVP down though and the hot tag brings in Batista to clean house. Everything breaks down and Khali chops Batista right back down, only to have the Vice Grip reversed into the spinebuster. MVP makes the save so Batista spears Khali down for the pin.

Rating: B-. This was a near shockingly good match as they worked the formula and got some time, making it into a match where I wanted to see how it ended. What mattered the most here though was MVP didn’t take the fall, which had me worried throughout. Khali has nothing going on at the moment and thankfully WWE realized he should be taking the pin.

Eve Torres comes out to introduce High Chief Peter Maivia and Rocky Johnson for the Hall of Fame, with the Rock inducting them. I get that she has to do something, but the Hall of Fame announcement (even one repeated from Raw) doesn’t feel exactly right for someone who has been around for all of a few months.

Jesse & Festus vs. Miz/John Morrison

Non-title but before the match, we get a clip from the Dirt Sheet with a completely genuine conversation between the teams, which makes Jesse & Festus sound a bit dumb. The bell rings and Festus jumps Miz and Morrison before sending the former into the corner for a running shot to the face.

A headbutt lets Jesse come in with a middle rope elbow and even knock Morrison off the apron. Miz gets smart by taking a breather on the floor and Jesse gets taken down back inside. That lasts all of a few seconds as an easy escape sets up the hot tag to Festus. House is cleaned and Festus sits on Morrison’s chest and grabs the fireman’s carry flapjack for the pin.

Rating: C. The champs lose again (after losing on ECW to Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney), which is far too common of a trope in WWE. At least Jesse and Festus are a bit better team, but it isn’t like they’re the next great thing. Other than the good looking flapjack, there wasn’t much to be seen here, especially after that rather awesome…Khali match?

Raw Rebound.

Big Daddy V vs. Balls Mahoney

Matt Striker is here with V. Mahoney gets beaten down to start and there’s the swinging Boss Man Slam. The corner splash and Samoan drop crush Mahoney….and there’s the Undertaker’s gong. The lights go out and Undertaker POWER WALKS to the ring (egads) to beat V outside. Mahoney gets chokeslammed too as it’s a no contest because DQ’s are passe or something.

Post match Undertaker says death waits for no man, so Edge needs to send his minion to Undertaker’s yard.

Undertaker vs. Zack Ryder

Edge and Curt Hawkins are here too. Ryder bails to the floor to start and a distraction lets him get in a few cheap shots. That earns Ryder a hard posting and there’s the kick to the side of the head. The beating continues back inside before Undertaker throws him over the top in a heap. Ryder tries to come in off the top but Hawkins has to save him from a chokeslam. Some right hands in the corner just annoy Undertaker so he throws Ryder into the corner to hammer away. Snake Eyes into the big boot set up the chokeslam and choke, which is enough to draw Edge in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. More or less a squash here for Undertaker and that’s all it needed to be. A heel like Edge has minions for a reason and Undertaker got to wreck one of them on the way to Wrestlemania. Ryder is nowhere near ready to be a challenge to Undertaker so this went as it should have gone. It doesn’t make it interesting, but it was logical.

Post match Undertaker is having none of this and beats up the Edgeheads, including the choke to Hawkins. Undertaker holds up the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Undertaker vs. Edge is starting to feel like a big deal and that is how a major Wrestlemania match should come off. The match got another hard push here and when you add in….Great Khali having the match of the night…..it was a pretty decent show. They need something else to build up aside from Edge vs. Undertaker, but they still have a few weeks to make that work.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – February 26, 2008: Blech Is Never A Good Description

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: February 26, 2008
Location: Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona
Attendance: 5,200
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re on the way to Wrestlemania and this week isn’t likely to have Ric Flair for a main event. Chavo Guerrero vs. CM Punk should be done for good but you never can tell with that feud. It feels like it could somehow keep going despite being long past its expiration date. If not Punk though, who else is supposed to go after the title? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kelly Kelly/Kofi Kingston vs. Santino Marella/Layla

The women start things off as Tazz talks about some 80s song. Actually we’ll switch to the men as Kelly has to bring in “Koko Kingston”. That’s fine with Kofi, who knocks Marella into the corner and hammers away. Back up and Santino gets in a cheap shot to take over and a clothesline allows for some posing.

Layla even gets in some hair pulling from the apron, allowing Santino to work on an armbar. For some reason Santino tags Layla in, which is as good as Kofi tagging Kelly. Some clotheslines drop Layla and Kelly hits a high crossbody for one as everything breaks down. Trouble In Paradise drops Santino and a Fameasser gives Kelly the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as good as Santino doing his lame offense to Kofi for a few minutes before the women came in for the finish was going to be. Santino is a fun character but he doesn’t exactly have the in-ring work to back it up in any way. Kofi continues to feel like someone WWE is protecting and that is a good sign for his future.

Bunnymania is coming at Wrestlemania.

Video on Maria’s Playboy shoot.

Stevie Richards vs. Mike Knox

Knox, ever the villain, goes for the throat to start and a hot shot cuts off a comeback attempt. The slow beating is on and Knox grabs a chinlock to stay on the throat. That’s switched into a choke so the fans start begging for the comeback. Richards comes up with a superkick but the StevieT is blocked. Instead Richards avoids a charge into the corner and now the StevieT is enough to finish Knox off.

Rating: D+. Do you know how fast someone with the limited offense of Knox is going to run out of throat based moves? Richards has a good story, but there is only so much that you can do with it week after week. Yeah he has a bad throat, but if that’s all you’re getting, how far is this supposed to go?

Tommy Dreamer tells Colin Delaney that he as a future as his injuries are starting to heal. Delaney asks if he can have his own theme music when he becomes a star. Dreamer glares at him.

Raw Rebound.

Commentary gets serious about the Vince McMahon/JBL/Hornswoggle/Finlay ordeal.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Tommy Dreamer/Colin Delaney

Non-title. Dreamer armdrags Morrison down to start but Delaney tags himself in (Dreamer: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”) and hits a dropkick. Morrison takes him down without much trouble though and it’s off to Miz to hammer away in the corner. The backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gives Morrison two and it’s back to Miz for a chinlock. Delaney fights up and Dreamer gets the tag to start the house cleaning. A reverse DDT plants Miz and Morrison is sent outside. Dreamer sends Miz into Delaney and the DDT is good for the pin.

Rating: C-. It might make sense in the story but Dreamer and Delaney just beat the Tag Team Champions completely clean. That’s not the best thing to see and while Miz and Morrison aren’t likely to drop the titles, it feels like a repeat of the Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore feud. Just stop having the champs get pinned.

Video on the Wrestlemania press conference, with the focus on Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Miz and John Morrison are yelling at each other when they’re told Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney are getting a Tag Team Title shot next week. They aren’t scared.

CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke vs. Shelton Benjamin

The winner gets an ECW Title shot against Chavo Guerrero, on commentary, next week. The fans are behind Punk as Benjamin kicks Burke to the floor. Chavo: “I would have ducked.” Benjamin knocks Punk down but Burke low bridges him outside to even things up a bit. Back in and Punk grabs a slightly scary flapjack on Burke but Benjamin comes in for the jumping Downward Spiral to drop Punk.

We take a break and come back with Benjamin sunset bombing Punk to the floor but getting dropkicked off the apron by Burke. The Outer Limits elbow gets two on Punk and the running crotch attack to the back of the next hits Benjamin as Burke is the only one left standing. Punk pulls Burke off the top, only to get caught with Benjamin’s dragon whip to cut him down as well. Burke knocks Benjamin out to the floor but Punk is back up with the GTS for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C+. They didn’t hide what they were going to do with the winner here and that isn’t the worst thing. That being said, I’m completely burned out on Punk vs. Chavo, but who else is there to go after the title? ECW is really weak on top faces right now and I don’t think I can see Stevie Richards getting a title shot. That leaves Punk, and that isn’t much to write home about at the moment.

Post match Guerrero gets in the ring for the staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Blech, what a weak show this was, with Kofi vs. Santino being one of the more interesting things going on. You can only get so much with this limited of a roster and no one else to challenge Chavo, so this was more a matter of time than anything else. The main event was fine, but I need more than Punk vs. Chavo 47 or whatever it is to pique my interest.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – February 25, 2008: Friendly Photo Op

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 25, 2008
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re still on the Road to Wrestlemania and now we have a new participant in the Raw World Title match. Last week, John Cena defeated Randy Orton in a non-title match to make the title match a triple threat match. Other than that, we’re setting up some Money in the Bank participants so now we get to see who else gets to join. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of John Cena beating Randy Orton last week to get into the Wrestlemania title match, only to have HHH lay them both out.

Orton, Cena and HHH are in the ring for what seems to be a photo opportunity, as moderated by William Regal. With the photo taken, each one gets to say something so we can know their thoughts heading into the match. Cena goes first and says he was raised that if you have a problem with someone, you say it to their face.

With that, he gets in HHH’s face and thanks him for not throwing out last week’s match, allowing Cena to go to Wrestlemania. He does have a problem with the Pedigree, but HHH says he wants Cena in the ring at Wrestlemania. HHH thinks a lot of the fans liked the Pedigree and Cena better get used to it, because at Wrestlemania, he’s getting another one. Cena remembers HHH tapping out at Wrestlemania, which is enough for HHH to take off his jacket.

The staredown is on but Orton says one thing is going to remain the same: he is still WWE Champion. The two of them have come after him but he still has the title. You might even say THE CHAMP IS HERE! Orton says the two of them can’t do anything about it, which is enough for the fight to be on. With Orton sent outside, HHH punches Cena down but Orton is back in with the RKO to both of them. Orton poses, leaves, then poses again. Good segment to get everyone in the ring and doing something in less than ten minutes.

Post break Orton is in the back when he runs into Mr. Kennedy. Since Wrestlemania is right around the corner, Kennedy has been thinking about winning Money In The Bank and cashing in that night, so Orton loses no matter what. Orton promises violence if Kennedy tries.

Carlito/Santino Marella vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Non-title and Maria is here with Carlito and Santino. Marella and Rhodes start things off with Rhodes slamming him down and dropping a knee. Rhodes gets sent into Carlito on the apron and Santino gets in a takedown. That’s enough for Carlito to come in and stomp away as Lawler is trying to get Maria to come sit next to him. A swinging neckbreaker drops Rhodes for two but he Russian legsweeps his way to freedom. Holly comes in to clean house as Lawler throws his crown at Maria to get her attention. The distraction lets Holly slam Marella off the top and hit the Alabama Slam for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well at least Lawler’s jabbering turned into a little something with the ending. I’m not sure why they didn’t just make this a title match for the sake of giving the champs a successful defense, especially when it’s Carlito/Marella. The match was short and to the point, which was mainly about Maria, who is higher profile than the four people in the match at the moment.

We recap Big Show agreeing to fight Floyd Mayweather Jr. last week.

We go to the Wrestlemania press conference, with Mayweather vs. Big Show confirmed for the show. Mayweather, standing on something, had a staredown with Show, who promised to explain pain.

William Regal is happy with the controversy and promises more of it when Mr. Kennedy and Randy Orton team up to face John Cena and HHH tonight. Chris Jericho comes in to mock Regal’s hair and offer him some tea (in a seven year old call back) before getting to the point: he wants in Money In The Bank. Regal is cool with that, but Jericho has to qualify against Jeff Hardy. Oh and it’s next. Cool with Jericho, but Regal’s shirt and tie aren’t.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title and Hardy is already qualified but doesn’t seem to lose anything if Jericho wins. Feeling out process to start with Jericho going after the arm so Hardy mule kicks his way to freedom. A high crossbody gives Jericho two and a suplex is good for the same. The enziguri is countered into a catapult over the top but they both dive back in for a standoff as we take a break.

Back with Jericho cranking on both arms and then punching Hardy down for two. They both try crossbodies and crash to give us a double knockdown. It’s Hardy up first to knock Jericho into the corner, where he avoids a bulldog to really take over. The fans are behind Jericho as he breaks up a Whisper In The Wind, which is broken up as well so Hardy’s second attempt works just fine.

Hardy loads up a hurricanrana but gets countered into the Walls, sending Hardy over to the rope. Jericho gets dropped again but is fine enough to avoid the Swanton. The Lionsault connects for two so Jericho tries the Walls again. With that broken up, Jericho grabs a rollup for the fast pin.

Rating: B-. These two having a good match is no surprise whatsoever and they had the time to make it work. I still don’t know why Hardy needed to take a fall here when he was already in the ladder match, but at least Jericho has something to do at Wrestlemania. You know, because he was stuck in the cold otherwise.

Here is Vince McMahon to discuss Hornswoggle’s beating last week. Vince says last week was a mistake, as Hornswoggle was beaten into oblivion by JBL. Therefore, he apologizes to Hornswoggle and wants JBL out here right now. A rather nervous looking JBL comes out and Vince demands an apology for taking it too far last week.

JBL apologizes….for not doing it sooner. See, he has it on good advice that Hornswoggle is NOT Vince’s son, but rather Finlay’s. Hornswoggle didn’t know, but Finlay knew the entire time and JBL has the documentation to prove it. Now JBL is going to make Finlay pay. Well that moved things forward fast, and it’s only a few months too late.

John Cena comes in to see HHH, who says to save the “we don’t like each other but we have to work together”. HHH wants to go out there and win because that is what he does best. Cena feels the same and tells HHH to watch his own back.

Umaga vs. DH Smith

Smith pounds away to start for a grand total of no avail. A splash, the running hip attack and the Samoan Spike finish Smith off in a hurry. Total squash.

We go to William Regal’s office where the Burchills are impressed with Umaga. Regal says he’s perfect, as he has received a challenge from Vickie Guerrero for a Raw vs. Smackdown showdown at Wrestlemania. Katie Lea thinks Paul would be better, but Regal needs to see more first. The Burchills go to leave, but Paul comes back to say Katie might like Regal.

Lance Cade vs. Shawn Michaels

Trevor Murdoch is here with Cade. They start fast with Cade hitting something like a Side Effect but Michaels gets up before Cade can hit anything else. Shawn misses the top rope elbow but manages to pull Cade into the Crossface. That’s enough for Murdoch to run in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. This felt like an excuse to get Shawn in the ring and that is probably leading somewhere with Ric Flair. Other than that, it is kind of sad to see Cade and Murdoch reduced to almost nothing. WWE doesn’t have many tag teams so why have one of them turn into such an unimportant pair?

Post match Shawn cleans house and has a bloody nose. Cue Ric Flair to interrupt (well kind of, as Shawn was just standing there) and Shawn immediately pays respect. Flair can’t believe what an honor it is to be the first active wrestler in the Hall of Fame. The one thing he wants to do to make it even better is to wrestle Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania.

Shawn brings up the “you lose, you’re done” stipulation and he doesn’t want to be the one to end Flair’s career. Flair doesn’t like Shawn’s tone because who says Flair would be losing? All of the respect that Shawn gave him last week means nothing if Shawn doesn’t give him this match. That’s enough for Shawn and he’s in. Well that didn’t take much of a push. They leave together and everything is cool.

Mike Adamle announces the next inductees into the Hall of Fame: High Chief Peter Maivia and Rocky Johnson. This would be in no way a gift to get the Rock to be happy with the company.

Lawler announces Bunnymania: Maria/Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina.

We get a behind the scenes look at Maria’s Playboy shoot.

John Cena/HHH vs. Mr. Kennedy/Randy Orton

Cena and HHH clear the ring to start and we take a break less than thirty seconds in. Back with HHH sending Kennedy into the corner and Cena coming in to do the same. HHH tags himself back in and throws a crotch chop at Cena, allowing Kennedy to get in a cheap shot. Orton comes in and stomps away before dropping a knee for two.

We hit the chinlock to keep HHH in trouble before Orton sends him out to the apron. HHH finally kicks Kennedy down but Orton is right there to block the hot tag to Cena. The RKO is blocked though and HHH calls into the tag off to Cena to clean house. Orton has to break up the FU on Kennedy so HHH takes Orton outside, leaving Kennedy to tap to the STFU.

Rating: C. Totally run of the mill main event style tag match but so much of it was during the break that there wasn’t much to be seen. You can only get so much out of a match that only had about eight minutes of TV time and there was no reason for anyone but Kennedy to take the fall. The triple threat match is looking good, but this wasn’t the best way to set it up.

Post match Cena and HHH have a staredown, allowing Kennedy to Mic Check Cena to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Well, the wrestling wasn’t great, but they have Wrestlemania in sight and a good portion of the card is either set or all but set. That being said, you can only get so much out of a show with almost nothing in the way of very good action. WWE needs to find a way to do both or the next month could get pretty rough in a hurry. For now though, this was just ok and that’s not the best way to get to Wrestlemania.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 22, 2008: Fix The Monster Problem

Smackdown
Date: February 22, 2008
Location: Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re done with No Way Out and Edge is still the World Champion, meaning he is set to defend the title against the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. That could be in for a long build and the question now is what else will be on the Wrestlemania card. They have some work to do to get it ready so let’s get to it.

Here is No Way Out if you need a recap.

We look at Undertaker winning the Elimination Chamber to become #1 contender.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and the Edgeheads to get things going. Edge brags about retaining the World Title at No Way Out because the three of them hurt Rey Mysterio last week in Chile. Now he is on to Wrestlemania to face the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, where Edge wants to cement his legacy by ending the Streak. Edge has his own Wrestlemania undefeated streak and something has to give. He goes against the impossible and succeeds, which is why he will succeed.

For fifteen years, everyone has asked who will finally defeat the Undertaker (eh, more like the last seven or eight) and he will not fall. This year it all ends because he is that man. Then the gong strikes and here is Undertaker to beat up the Edgeheads, who offer enough of a distraction for Edge to escape. Perfectly fine first segment for the feud.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Shelton powers him into the corner to start and drives some shoulders to the ribs. Yang fights out, only to get buckle bombed HARD into the corner. The chinlock goes on for a bit before a t-bone suplex cuts off Yang’s comeback. A backbreaker keeps Yang in trouble before Benjamin puts him up top. Yang shoves him away, only to have Benjamin jump up to the top for an overhead belly to belly superplex.

Another buckle bomb is countered with a hurricanrana and a spinning headscissors drops Benjamin again. The running spinwheel kick in the corner sets up a high crossbody for two on Benjamin, followed by a sunset flip out of the corner for the same. That’s enough for Benjamin, who avoids the moonsault press and hits the jumping Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C. Yang is a good example of someone who has been built up well enough to be a bit of a headache for Benjamin. There was no way Yang was going to get in a match like Money In The Bank, but at least they didn’t have the match be total dominance. This was a completely watchable match and that’s more than I was expecting.

Teddy Long runs into the returning Maryse, who says she hasn’t been around for a long time. She would like to ask him something….in his office.

Jesse And Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Festus headbutts Deuce down to start and it’s off to Jesse for a drop toehold. Jesse sends him outside but a Cherry distraction lets Domino get in a cheap shot. We hit the chinlock back inside (with Jesse looking like he is tapping) before Jesse is draped over the top for a forearm to the back from Domino. Back up and Festus adds a headbutt from the apron, allowing Jesse to hit his own headbutt. That’s enough for the hot tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. A Rocket Launcher finishes Domino.

Rating: C. Festus is a fun act, but you can only get so much out of the idea of Jesse does a regular match and then tags Festus to wreck things. That doesn’t have the longest shelf life and it is already starting to lose steam. Festus has something with the idea, but there is only so much that can be done with what is basically a one man team.

Raw Rebound.

Video on the South American tour.

Big Daddy V. vs. Shannon Moore

Matt Striker is here with V. Moore gets shoved down to start and his kicks just annoy V a bit more. The swinging Boss Man Slam plants Moore and V sends him flying again. A missed charge lets Moore kick away a few times until V runs him own. The really big elbow finishes Moore off.

Rating: D+. If WWE insists on pushing V as the monster over and over, he needs a win like this every so often. This was almost a total squash and Moore probably got in more than he should have. Moore getting crushed isn’t a bad thing, but V has lost so much that it has me wondering how many more times they can keep reheating him.

MVP vs. Batista

Non-title. During his entrance, we get an inset promo from MVP, saying Batista can’t beat him twice in a row. Batista drives him into the corner to start before going with a boot into MVP’s banged up back. MVP manages to send him face first into the buckle though and a forearm to the back of the head drops Batista for a change.

The running big boot to the side of the head knocks Batista off the apron and MVP hammers away back inside. We hit the chinlock so Batista fights up, only to get sent right back to the floor in a bit of a surprise. The front facelock goes on back inside, setting up a facebuster for two on Batista. That doesn’t last long though as Batista is back with three straight spinebusters and the Batista Bomb finishes fast.

Rating: C. Oh yeah MVP is in that bad place, as he is losing over and over again while still US Champion. In other words, WWE seems to think that he is bulletproof and that means he is going to lose more and more. Why Batista needed to beat him again isn’t the most clear concept, but I would bet on a reaction of “oh well” as they move on.

We get a medical update on Hornswoggle after he got beaten down so badly on Raw. Naturally we see the beatdown, which commentary describes as so horrible.

Great Khali vs. Kane

Kane slugs away to start and gets hit in the face for his efforts. Khali gets knocked back into the corner but a clothesline of his own puts Kane back down. The slugout continues with Kane hitting an uppercut but getting caught going up top. We hit the nerve hold and then the Vice Grip but Kane kicks off the corner and falls backwards for the pin.

Rating: D. It was a bunch of punches and chops before the fluke ending to keep Khali looking strong. Kane was trying here but what exactly is he supposed to do in a situation like this? Khali continues to be so limited in the ring, but much like Big Daddy V, it stops meaning anything when he loses over and over again.

Video on the Streak.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Matt Jackson

Yes that Matt Jackson and Palumbo runs him over with a clothesline to start. Jackson hits a dropkick as Michelle McCool is watching in the back. Palumbo knocks him to the floor for a fall away slam, followed by a clothesline back inside. The Full Throttle finishes Jackson fast.

Here is Rey Mysterio for an update on his health. Rey gets right to the point: he has a torn bicep and needs surgery. Unfortunately the surgery will take place this weekend, so he won’t be at Wrestlemania. If this is the last time that he is going to be in the ring for a long time, there is no better place to be than in San Diego.

Cue Vickie Guerrero to say she doesn’t care if Rey is hurt because he ruined her moment last week. We see Rey “accidentally” hitting Vickie with a springboard seated senton last week and Rey still isn’t very sorry. Vickie doesn’t want to hear it, but Rey has a match RIGHT NOW, injury or not.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title. Chavo charges at him to start and hammers away with Rey falling around the ring. Rey manages a hurricanrana but gets faceplanted to cut that off in a hurry. We take a break and come back with Chavo working on the arm. Rey even has to go to the ropes to escape, leaving Chavo to baseball slide him to the floor. Back in and Rey manages another headscissors, setting up the running seated senton off the apron.

Chavo catches Rey up top back inside, only to get knocked down to set up a top rope seated senton. The basement dropkick gets two more and the 619 has Chavo down. Rey’s arm won’t let him hit the springboard though, allowing Chavo to catch him on top. Three Amigos have Rey in trouble but he avoids the frog splash, allowing Rey to come back with a sunset flip for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Given Rey’s injury, this went about as well as it could have gone. That being said, it doesn’t say much when Chavo, the reigning ECW Champion, knew this was coming and was healthy but still lost anyway. WWE already hasn’t exactly made ECW look good and now it is even worse with this latest development as Rey is on the way out.

Post match Vickie says it’s her turn to hurt Rey….so here is Big Show to lay Rey out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Edge vs. Undertaker is going to be fine but they didn’t exactly do anything to start another feud here. Rey was written off due to his injury for the sake of crushing him in his hometown, but we knew he was already heading off for surgery. Throw in a bunch of pretty ok at best matches and there just wasn’t much worth seeing as we start the Road To Wrestlemania.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – February 19, 2008: They Don’t Need A Guest Star

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: February 19, 2008
Location: Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with No Way Out and on the way to Wrestlemania, which probably won’t mean much for ECW. Chavo Guerrero retained the ECW World Title by defeating CM Punk, again, and that means we need something else on the way to Orlando. I doubt we get that this week, but you have to start somewhere. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Ric Flair to get things going with an in-ring interview with Tazz. After the traditional sucking up, Tazz congratulates Flair on being the first inductee into the 2008 Hall Of Fame class. Flair says it’s an honor, but being the first active wrestler to be inducted may be the ultimate honor. He isn’t going to retire, but he knows that he has to retire after his next loss. That won’t be happening anytime soon though, so WOO!

Cue Elijah Burke to interrupt and say he was a Flair fan growing up. Vince McMahon told him to usher in the new generation and that is what he’s done, so give him four fingers. Cue Shelton Benjamin to interrupt the interrupter and congratulate Flair for always being the Gold Standard. At least he was though, because now Benjamin is in that spot. Flair doesn’t buy their sincerity and says no matter what they do, they’ll never equal sixteen World Titles. The fight is on until CM Punk runs in for the save.

Post break Burke and Benjamin aren’t happy. Armando Alejandro Estrada comes in to make the obvious tag match.

Kofi Kingston vs. Jason Riggs

Riggs’ headlock doesn’t last long as Kingston slips out and armdrags him into an armbar. Back up and Riggs grabs a slam into a chinlock, with Kofi fighting up for the double chop. The double legdrop sets up Trouble In Paradise to give Kofi the fast pin.

Post match Kofi says he’ll keep winning.

We look at Vince McMahon and JBL destroying Hornswoggle in a cage on Raw. Finlay carrying Hornswoggle out was a great visual.

Miz vs. Colin Delaney

John Morrison and Tommy Dreamer are here too. Miz mocks the heavily bandaged Delaney to start and knocks him into the corner for the running clothesline. Delaney gets in a few shots so Morrison offers a distraction. That’s enough to earn himself an ejection and Delaney grabs a rollup for two. Miz isn’t having this and Reality Checks him for the pin.

Post match Dreamer goes after Miz but the villains beat down both Dreamer and Delaney without much trouble.

We look at Maria beating Beth Phoenix to earn the right to be in Playboy.

Kelly Kelly is proud of Maria and would love to be in Playboy someday.

Stevie Richards vs. James Curtis

We get another clip of Stevie’s interview from a few weeks ago and it’s now the third time we’ve heard the same story. Curtis clotheslines him down and Richards grabs his throat. Said throat is gone after with a chinlock but Richards kicks him in the ribs a few times. A running splash in the corner sets up the StevieT to finish Curtis fast.

Raw Rebound.

CM Punk/Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin/Elijah Burke

Punk and Burke get things going as Joey explains that Flair’s career is NOT on the line because this is a tag match. At least that gives us a tiny bit more uncertainty about the winner. A slam drops Burke early and Flair comes in for the chops. Burke gets smart by poking him in the eye and Benjamin comes in, only for Flair to go up top for a DOUBLE SHOT TO THE VILLAINS and we take a break.

Back with Flair avoiding a charge in the corner and doing a Flair Flop into the corner for the tag to Punk (that was cute). House is cleaned but Benjamin shoves off a running bulldog attempt. The villains start working on the ribs, including Benjamin hitting a buckle bomb and almost powerbombing Punk out to the floor (that should have been a bigger deal). Back in and Punk escapes a powerbomb and hits a jumping enziguri, allowing the tag back to Flair. Everything breaks down and Benjamin kicks Flair’s leg out to break up a suplex. The Elijah Express misses though and Flair Figure Fours him for the win.

Rating: C. Completely basic match here with a grand total of almost nothing in the way of doubt about the result. Flair’s next loss is going to be a big deal and it isn’t happening to a pair of pretty midcard names on ECW. It’s nice to have Flair in a nothing match like this for a change though, and it isn’t like Burke losing hurts him in the slightest.

Overall Rating: C-. The show was watchable enough at best and that’s about all the praise I can give it. The biggest problem here is that it felt like a nothing show where they just got in and out without doing anything important. That doesn’t exactly get us onto the Road to Wrestlemania that well but at least they didn’t have anything to that badly. Uninteresting yes, but badly no.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – February 18, 2008: Target Acquired

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 18, 2008
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

No Way Out is out of the way and now we have a clear path to Wrestlemania XXIV in just over a month. It’s time to start the build and the good thing is you can probably see a few of the matches from here. As for this week, Vince McMahon gets to face Hornswoggle in a cage, because this story is still going. Let’s get to it.

Here is No Way Out if you need a recap.

Here is new #1 contender HHH to get things going. HHH talks about how happy he is, because last year he was getting ready to go watch Wrestlemania from a wheelchair backstage. Well now he is back where he belongs and he is going to become a 12 time World Champion, but here is (still WWE Champion) Randy Orton to interrupt. Orton says this title reign started with HHH, who he beat to become the champion. Four years ago, HHH was jealous of Orton because Orton was that much better.

Cue John Cena to interrupt as well because he wants to wait a cotton picking minute (Cena: “Yeah I went there.”). Cena accuses Orton of losing his way into Wrestlemania so tonight, let’s have a rematch for the title with the winner facing HHH. Orton appeals to HHH, who doesn’t really care who he faces at Wrestlemania.

Cue William Regal to say HHH is going to Wrestlemania no matter what, but tonight Orton will face Cena….in a non-title match. If Cena wins, he moves on to the main event of Wrestlemania in a triple threat match. HHH isn’t cool with that because he has already earned his shot, but Regal makes it more interesting: HHH can be guest referee for Orton vs. Cena. This was shorter than I would have expected to come up with something like that.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Jeff Hardy vs. Snitsky

Snitsky shoves him down without much trouble to start and there’s the boot choke in the corner. Hardy isn’t having that and sends him into the corner for the slingshot dropkick. A big boot puts Snitsky on the floor in a crash and we take a break. Back with Hardy caught in a bearhug and then getting shouldered down hard. Three elbows give Snitsky two and we hit a crossface choke (minus the arm trap).

Snitsky lets that go and misses a big leg, allowing Hardy to hit the Whisper in the Wind for two. The Twist of Fate is blocked and a big boot drops Hardy for two more. The pumphandle slam is loaded up but Hardy reverses into the Twist of Fate. That’s enough to set up the Swanton to send Hardy to Wrestlemania.

Rating: C+. A smaller hero vs. a monster is something that will always work and they had it going well here. That is all you need in a lot of cases and Hardy being one of the most popular stars in the company helps a lot. They had a perfectly fine story here and Hardy knows exactly how to do a match like this one. Nice job.

Mike Adamle brings out Shawn Michaels for a chat. Shawn gets right to the point: the greatest wrestler of all time and the man who inspired him to get into wrestling is going into the WWE Hall Of Fame. The fans give a WOO and we see the Ric Flair Hall of Fame video. Your mileage on Flair may vary, but I don’t think this is anything resembling a controversial pick.

Paul Burchill vs. Super Crazy

Katie Lea is here with Burchill (who gets a PAUL THE PIRATE chant) and we get an inset promo where they talk about how attractive the other is. Burchill strikes away to start and curb stomps Crazy for the very fast pin. Total dominance.

Randy Orton comes in to see HHH and hints at an alliance, but HHH says he’s only going to do things that favor him.

We look at Big Show returning last night to attack Rey Mysterio, with Floyd Mayweather Jr. making the save and breaking Show’s nose.

Here is Big Show for a chat. Show was asked to come out here and apologize for what happened last night. He will apologize, even though he thinks Mayweather should apologize. Show asks Mayweather to come out here in person, so cue Mayweather with about six other people behind him.

Mayweather says he has been a WWE fan for many years and he’s sorry things went that way last night. He was called out and had to retaliate. Show says he was just trying to get some publicity and apologizes. They shake hands and Mayweather leaves in peace….but Show says hang on a minute.

Show wants to get something off his chest: the only way Mayweather could hurt him was on his knees and he was STILL bigger than Mayweather. The truth is Show could take him out in two minutes and the challenge is on. Mayweather, and entourage, come back to the ring and sure let’s do it. The tease of a right hand makes Show back up but Mayweather leaves. I think I know where this is going.

Video on Money in the Bank.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Mr. Kennedy vs. Val Venis

Kennedy, with new music, sends Venis shoulder first into the post to start and goes after the arm on the mat. The armbar goes on as JR is smart enough to say that Venis is recently back from elbow surgery. Back up and the Mic Check sends Kennedy to Wrestlemania in a hurry.

Vince McMahon vs. Hornswoggle

In a cage. Finlay comes to the ring and wants to fight for Hornswoggle but is told to get out. Cue JBL to slam the cage door on the back of Finlay’s head and then handcuff him to the top rope. Vince pulls out a belt and whips Hornswoggle as Finlay can’t do anything. Vince leaves and JBL throws Hornswoggle into the cage.

Finlay tells JBL to beat him up instead but Hornswoggle gets kicked in the head. The fall away slam into the cage leaves Hornswoggle laying and even Vince says that’s enough as JBL leaves. This was more intense than I would have bet on, with commentary being silent making it better. No match of course.

Here are Santino Marella and Maria for a chat. We get a poll on if Maria should pose for Playboy, with 94% saying yes. I know it’s a popular concept, but maybe you should wait a bit after such a serious moment? Anyway Santino announces that Maria is posing but Beth cuts him off for a match that Maria didn’t seem to know what was coming. Hold on though as Santino reads the fine print: no Playboy unless Maria wins here!

Beth Phoenix vs. Maria

Non-title and Beth slams her down with ease to start. Cue the returning Candice Michelle for a distraction though and Maria grabs a rollup. There was no way to do this without pinning the unstoppable champion?

Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Non-title but if Cena wins, the Raw World Title match at Wrestlemania is a triple threat, also involving guest referee HHH. Cena backs him into the corner to start but Orton scores with an uppercut. A dropkick has Cena out on the apron and Orton knocks him into the announcers’ table as we take a break.

Back with Cena getting a boot up in the corner and dropping an elbow for a fast two. Orton is right back up and a hanging DDT gets two on Cena, followed by the snap powerslam for the same. The circle stomps set up a jumping knee to the head for two more and frustration is setting in.

We hit the chinlock so Cena is up fast, only to miss a charge into the corner as he still can’t keep anything going. Cena shrugs off a ran into the buckle and initiates the finishing sequence but Orton grabs the rope to block the FU. They head outside with Cena being sent into the steps but the RKO is countered into the STFU. The rope is grabbed so Cena yells at HHH, only to duck a cheap shot from Orton. A quick FU sends Cena to Wrestlemania.

Rating: C+. So there’s one of your Wrestlemania main events as you knew the ending to Orton vs. Cena last night was going to wind up going somewhere. Cena being added to the match does add something fresh to the whole thing, but this wasn’t exactly a classic. The match felt big, but another champion gets pinned, albeit with some shenanigans.

HHH Pedigrees both of them and poses with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I’ve got a feeling this is going to be the start of the Wrestlemania season trend, as there was very little here in the way of wrestling. Instead, this was ALL about setting up Wrestlemania in one form or another. I can go for that, as they don’t have very long before Wrestlemania and the rapid fire build has begun. Good enough stuff here, but it’s all about the future.

 

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No Way Out 2008 (2022 Redo): The Focus Shifts

No Way Out 2008
Date: February 17, 2008
Location: Thomas & Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 15,240
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re on the Road To Wrestlemania and in this case, WWE is embracing the more is more philosophy. We have a pair of Elimination Chamber matches with the winners going on to the World Title matches at Wrestlemania. In addition, we have John Cena vs. Randy Orton for the Raw World Title, which should feel quite big. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the Road To Wrestlemania going into a place that has no way out. We shift into a traditional Chamber video, as it continues to seem almost sentient given the descriptions.

We recap CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero for the ECW World Title. Guerrero cheated to beat Punk so Punk threw him in the Gulf of Mexico and is using his rematch here. As all great feuds go.

ECW World Title: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero is defending and slaps him in the face to start, earning himself a kick to the head. Punk gets sent outside and tripped face first onto the apron to put him in some early trouble. Back in and Chavo hits a suplex, thankfully without an Eddie reference. A bodyscissors (you don’t see that one very often) is countered into a catapult but Punk’s GTS is countered into a hurricanrana.

Punk kicks him into the head and goes into the Eddie Dance/Three Amigos, which is pretty soundly booed, even to the point of the crowd chanting for Chavo in a weird moment. Another kick puts Chavo on the floor so Punk puts him on top. The super hurricanrana is blocked though and a frog splash retains the title.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do much here but this feud needs to wrap up already. There is nothing left for these two to do to each other and this was a pretty clear ending. Chavo needs a fresh challenger and there is nothing left for Punk to do in ECW. Punk is going to be fine moving forward, but I’m not sure who can go after Chavo right now.

We look back at Rey Mysterio hitting a springboard seated senton on Vickie Guerrero this week on Smackdown.

Mysterio said it was an accident but he isn’t apologizing to Vickie. Oh and he has a torn bicep but is wrestling anyway. Floyd Mayweather Jr. comes in for a pep talk, though the fans don’t seem impressed.

The Chamber is lowered.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

Undertaker vs. Great Khali vs. Big Daddy V vs. MVP vs. Finlay vs. Batista

For the Smackdown World Title shot at Wrestlemania (and MVP’s US Title isn’t on the line) and inside the Elimination Chamber. Batista is in at #1 and Undertaker is in at #2 so they’re certainly starting big. They slug it out (duh) to start until Batista gets him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. That earns him a right hand over the ropes and it’s time to go fight on the steel. A face rake across the steel fires Batista up enough to knock Undertaker back inside, where Undertaker chokes in the corner. Undertaker stomps him down but an exchange of big boots gives us a double knockdown.

Big Daddy V is in at #3 to slam both of them down a few times. A headbutt knocks Undertaker out of the Chamber (that’s a new one) and he seems to be favoring his arm as a running splash against the wall crushes Undertaker back inside. Batista manages a spinebuster to V and Undertaker adds a DDT onto the Chamber to get rid of V (as pinfalls are now legal outside of the ring).

Great Khali is in at #4 and strikes away as the fans decide that the wrestler who is currently wrestling can’t wrestle. The chokebomb gets two on Undertaker and there’s the Vice Grip to Batista. With that broken up, Undertaker boots Batista in the face and chokes Khali out for the elimination. Undertaker rakes Batista against the cage until Finlay is in at #5. A missed big boot in the corner lets Finlay Celtic Cross Undertaker for two. Coach: “How is the Undertaker doing this?” Cole: “He’s the Undertaker.”

Finlay sends Undertaker into the cage wall for two but Undertaker knocks the other two down. MVP is in at #6….or at least he should be, as he stays in the pod. That’s not going to work for Undertaker, who drags him back in as Batista is up again. MVP uses a chain to knock down the monsters and Undertaker is busted open. Back up and Undertaker talks MVP to the top of the pod, where a super chokeslam brings him crashing back down. Finlay steals the pin to get rid of MVP and we’re down to three.

Undertaker misses a top rope elbow to Finlay though and here’s Hornswoggle to throw in a shillelagh. The shot to the head gets two on Batista but Undertaker is back up with a chokeslam onto the steel to Finlay for the elimination. Believe it or not, we come down to Batista vs. Undertaker for the title shot and they both have to pull themselves up. Batista is busted open as well and the big slugout is on with Batista hitting a quick Namesake Bomb for two.

For some reason Batista sees no problem with hammering down right hands in the corner, meaning the Last Ride gets two. Undertaker hammers away but gets clotheslined over the top and onto the steel. Batista follows as Undertaker seems to be favoring his arm so Batista tries a ram into the barricade. It’s just try because Undertaker blocks the contact and hits a Tombstone for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. There were two options here so this got a lot more interesting once they got rid of the people who were there to fill in spots. Big Daddy V. and Great Khali were never going to be any kind of a serious threat, but unfortunately the US Champion isn’t anything resembling a threat here. Undertaker vs. Batista was good enough, but they went smart by keeping that part short. Solid enough match here, though it could have used a third potential winner, if there is such a thing on Smackdown these days.

Edge wants the Edgeheads ready to help him with Rey Mysterio, but Teddy Long comes in to ban them from ringside for the title match.

Maria and Ashley are at the Playboy Mansion in an effort to get Maria to pose. I’m sure that is still up in the air at this point.

Ric Flair vs. Mr. Kennedy

Flair is coming in with a bad knee. Kennedy shoulders him down and mocks the strut so Flair hits a chop and shows him how it’s done. That’s enough for Kennedy to smarten up and go after the knee to take over. The half crab goes on and a rather swearing Flair makes the rope, meaning Kennedy puts on the Figure Four around the post. The regular Figure Four stays on the leg but the rope is grabbed again. Back up and a Regal Roll gives Kennedy two but Flair is back with some chop blocks. Flair gets the real Figure Four on and Kennedy taps rather quickly.

Rating: C-. That felt like it could have been on a house show and that is rarely a good sign on TV. Flair gets to keep going and I don’t know if there was much doubt about him losing at No Way Out. They had put together a pretty nice feud on the way here but then the match was just kind of there. I’m actually a bit disappointed for once and that’s not something I was expecting from this one.

Finlay is getting his back worked on when Vince McMahon comes in and promises violence to Hornswoggle tomorrow.

We recap Edge vs. Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title. Edge retained the title with help from Vickie Guerrero at the Royal Rumble so the rematch was set. Vickie was taken out on Smackdown, but it might not matter as Rey has a torn bicep, meaning this might not be so great.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Edge is defending and the Edgeheads are barred from ringside. Rey backs into the corner as Edge certainly knows about the bad arm. A hurricanrana sends Edge into the corner and Rey has to use left handed punches which has to be so awkward. Edge shrugs them off and takes Rey outside for a whip into the steps. Back in and Edge slowly hammers away before a headscissors sends him down for a crotching against the post. A left arm DDT gives Rey two and the 619 connects but the arm gives out. Rey’s springboard is speared out of the air to retain the title fast.

Rating: C. I can’t possibly put this one on them as Rey could barely do anything. They went just over five minutes and that was probably agony throughout. It’s better than no match and they did play into the arm injury to make sense. Rey is probably going to be gone for a long time but he certainly tried on his way out.

Post match Edge leaves and….here is the returning Big Show, for the first time in over a year. Show is glad to be back and says he’ll be a champion again on Raw, Smackdown or ECW. He’s been champion at all of those places and he’ll do it again, but he isn’t here to make guarantees. Since he’s been gone he’s lost 108lbs and now he is a lot meaner. To show this, he goes outside and grabs Rey by the throat while taunting Floyd Mayweather Jr. at ringside.

Mayweather jumps the barricade and gets inside, with security and his entourage right behind him. Show drops to his knee in front of Mayweather, who fires off some crazy fast punches to bust Show’s nose. Mayweather sprints off and Show gives chase, with Shane McMahon of all people having to calm him down. Show leaves, unfortunately not asking Shane “which way did he go”. So there’s your Wrestlemania celebrity match.

Mike Adamle throws us to the recap video for Randy Orton defending the Raw World Title against John Cena. Back in October, Cena got hurt and had to forfeit the title, which Orton somehow got twice in one night. Cena then returned at the Royal Rumble and won the whole thing, but is cashing in his title match here instead of at Wrestlemania (which apparently you can just do).

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Cena is challenging and we even get an old school weapons check. An early small package has Orton a bit nervous and Cena rolls him up for two more to make it worse. The fans are a bit split here as Orton knocks him down and starts the stomping. More stomping puts Cena down in the corner and the referee is actually asking if he wants to give up. Does he not get the whole Cena thing?

Cena hits a bulldog and drops an elbow for two but Orton cuts him off with a clothesline for the same. The fans are split again as Orton punches him out to the apron, only to get caught with the top rope Fameasser for two. The FU is countered into an uppercut (which looked like an RKO setup) and there’s the circle stomp. We hit the chinlock until Cena powers up and initiates the finishing sequence. Orton slips out of the FU again though and bails to the floor.

Back in and Orton grabs the backbreaker before avoiding another Cena top rope Fameasser. Instead Cena grabs the ProtoBomb into the STFU, with Orton having to bail to the ropes. That’s enough to send Orton bailing to the floor, where he grabs his knee and demands a countout. Cena won’t be having that and walks right into the RKO on the floor. Cena beats the count back in….so Orton hits the referee for the DQ escape.

Rating: B-. The ending was there to set up the rematch, as I don’t think anyone is going to buy that Cena’s big moment is coming at No Way Out. It seems ripe for the setup of another match, with Orton getting rather annoyed at his plan not working. The match was good as expected between these two, but the ending might as well have been a To Be Continued sign.

Post match Cena grabs the STFU to choke Orton out.

HHH and Shawn Michaels are going to be cool with each other no matter what happens in the Chamber.

HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Umaga vs. JBL vs. Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy

For the Raw World Title shot at Wrestlemania and Hardy’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. Jericho is in at #1 and Shawn is in at #2, which should make for a nice four minutes. Feeling out process to start before they go with the hard chops into a pinfall reversal sequence. Jericho cuts it off with a clothesline so Shawn hits one of his own. The top rope elbow only hits Jericho’s raised knees but manages to block the Walls. Back up and the collide, with Umaga coming in at #3.

A double clothesline takes both heroes down and Umaga makes it even worse with a double Samoan drop. Shawn gets kicked out onto the steel but Jericho avoids a middle rope headbutt. That lets Shawn go up for the top rope elbow to the back and Jericho grabs the logical Walls. Shawn adds a Crossface but it’s JBL in at #4 to break it up for whatever reason. Some kicks to the face (including Shawn’s bloody one) have the good guys in trouble and Umaga gets up to help JBL with the beatdown (a JBL/Umaga alliance seems odd as Umaga with money would be….weird).

HHH is in at #5 and goes after everyone not named Shawn. A DDT gets two on JBL and Umaga is sent head first (and HARD) into the pod. The Clothesline From JBL drops HHH but Jericho Codebreakers JBL for the pin. Hold on though as JBL grabs a chair and knocks Jericho/HHH/Umaga silly, with Jericho being busted open.

Jeff Hardy is in at #6 to complete the field and starts fast by mule kicking Umaga into the corner. A Whisper in the Wind drops HHH and Shawn but Umaga is back up to knock Hardy down. The swinging release Rock Bottom plants Jericho before hitting a SCARY running hip attack to drive him through the pod. Somehow Jericho isn’t in multiple pieces as it’s a superkick into a Codebreaker into a Pedigree into a Swanton off the top of the pod to Umaga for the pin.

Then Shawn superkicks Hardy to give Jericho the pin, only to have HHH Pedigree Shawn to get us down to Hardy vs. HHH. Hardy starts fast with a DDT onto the steel and a backdrop sends HHH back inside. The Swanton misses though and a Pedigree gets….two. Ok that was a surprise. HHH grabs a chair but has to counter a Twist of Fate. That’s enough to set up the Pedigree onto the chair to finish Hardy (and kill the crowd) for the Wrestlemania title shot.

Rating: B+. This was a good bit better than the first one as it had more violence, better action, more plausible winners (Shawn and Jericho weren’t winning, but they were more likely than MVP and Finlay) and a better pace. HHH winning isn’t a surprise, but dang Hardy was over here and that was a pretty bad loss. The fans going quiet after the pin didn’t help, but like HHH wasn’t going to get his big win at some point.

Overall Rating: B. Obviously this show was all about the Chambers and Orton vs. Cena, all of which worked pretty well. There isn’t much on the rest of the show, but you can see a lot of Wrestlemania from here so they got the important stuff right. This wasn’t a show built around a bunch of small stuff but rather three big things, which is quite the shift, especially so soon after the Royal Rumble. You can see Wrestlemania from here though and that is a good thing to see.

 

 

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Cyber Sunday 2008: Get Your Votes In

Cyber Sunday 2008
Date: October 26, 2008
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 7,981
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker, Todd Grisham

The major match is another step in the rise of Jeff Hardy, who has been chasing the World Title since back in January. This time he’s chasing HHH for the Smackdown World Title and has two out of three chances to get another shot as the options are Hardy, Vladimir Kozlov (a Russian monster) or both at the same time. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. ???

R-Truth – 59%
Festus – 25%
MVP – 15%

This is a special match that aired before the show on WWE.com. Shelton is defending and is now known as the Gold Standard, meaning he has gold hair and is really arrogant. Shelton goes after the arm to start but Truth flips over him in the corner and gets two off a leg lariat. The champ comes right back with a hot shot and running kick to the face before we hit the chinlock.

Truth fights up with right hands and clotheslines but takes too long going up, allowing Shelton to jump to the top because he’s an athletic freak. Benjamin gets shoved down so Truth can hit a missile dropkick for two. A quick Paydirt (jumping Downward Spiral) retains Shelton’s title at 3:23.

Rating: D+. This match existed so Truth could do his entrance and fire up the crowd so everything worked fine on that front. To be fair this was just a quick bonus match to get things going and WWE happened to air it on their website. Shelton was pretty much done as anything interesting as soon as he took on this Gold Standard deal because it was so one note and allowed him to keep being lazy and do nothing for the next year and a half before he left the company. Truth on the other hand is still in about the same spot eight years later. Not that there’s anything wrong with that as he’s still popular and employed.

The opening video is a bunch of wrestlers saying our votes don’t matter and no one cares. Then the wrestlers realize that these votes decide their future so tonight it’s all about the fans. Apparently it’s our pay per view. Then why did we have to pay for it?

Rey Mysterio vs. Kane

No Holds Barred – 39%
Falls Count Anywhere – 35%
Two Out Of Three Falls – 26%

Kane was back to being an evil monster and wanted to take Rey’s mask for reasons that weren’t exactly clear. Rey tries some fast offense early on but quickly resorts to weapons. This goes just as badly because someone nearly two feet shorter than Kane can’t do much with a stop sign, allowing Kane to kick him in the face. Well mask but you get the idea.

Kane lifts him up with one arm and rams him back first into the post for two back inside. We hit the trash talk as Kane berates Rey for hiding behind the mask. A legdrop gets two for Kane and he bends Rey’s back across his knee. It’s off to a nerve hold for a bit before we hit the backbreaker again. Rey rakes the eyes and scores with the sitout bulldog, followed by a quick enziguri.

That just earns him another boot to the face and now it’s time for a chair. Mysterio is fast enough to dropkick it back into Kane’s face, which Cole describes as “swashbuckling style.” The monster comes right back to knock Rey down, allowing him to go grab the steps. As expected, that just means Kane goes face first into the steps, setting up the springboard seated senton for two. A few chair shots set up the 619 and the springboard splash to give Rey the pin at 10:20.

Rating: D+. It was decent enough but the stipulation was barely used for the most part. This really just made Kane look more inept than monstrous, basically defeating the point of the feud. It’s also kind of an odd choice for an opener but the match wasn’t horrible and had some decent stuff from Rey. Overall though it feels flat and that’s not how you start a show.

There’s another Divas Halloween costume this year and we’ll be seeing the choices throughout the night, including Michelle McCool as a soldier, Katie Lea as a vampire (basically just her normal look with fangs), Lena Yada as a ninja and Candice Michelle as Marilyn Monroe.

Chris Jericho comes up to Legacy (Ted DiBiase Jr., Cody Rhodes and Manu (son of Afa), a group of second generation wrestlers) and says he loved the way they took out CM Punk. Jericho thinks they’re on the verge of greatness and suggests they take out Batista tonight. Cody tells him to do his dirty work himself.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. ???

Evan Bourne – 69%
Finlay – 25%
Mark Henry – 6%

Bourne is a high flier with a great looking shooting star press. Matt, in a rare position as the bigger man, runs Evan over a few times until Evan gets a good looking dropkick. Evan spins out of a test of strength to get two off a victory roll before reversing the Side Effect for the same result. Matt gets tired of this fast paced offense so he forearms Evan out to the floor to take over.

Back in and Bourne starts in on the arm for a change of pace. A standing shooting star press gets two on the champ and it’s right back to the arm. Hardy rolls outside for a breather and pretty easily breaks up an Asai Moonsault. Back in and Matt drops a middle rope elbow to the back for two, followed by a quickly broken abdominal stretch. Splash Mountain (Razor’s Edge into a powerbomb) is countered with a hurricanrana as the fans seem to be more behind Evan than Matt.

A pair of Side Effects gets two for Hardy but somehow Matt’s middle rope legdrop is countered by a spinwheel kick. Shouldn’t Matt have known that Evan was already up? Bourne gets two off a really fast moonsault press out of the corner as Todd says this has been going a hundred miles an hour since the opening bell. Someone needs to teach him the concept of speed. Matt grabs a rollup (and maybe some tights) for two but has to avoid the shooting star. The Twist of Fate retains Matt’s title at 11:04.

Rating: C. This picked up a lot after the halfway point but the first half with the arm work from Evan and Matt using power wasn’t the most exciting stuff. Matt never has been the best power guy/brawler so the match got better once he went back to his normal style. Bourne looked good here and would seem ready for a strong push but two days later he would dislocate his ankle and miss over four months.

Beth Phoenix is a gladiator, Jillian Hall is Batgirl, Maria is a bunny and Kelly Kelly is a sailor.

Here are the choices for the next tag match:

John Morrison/The Miz vs. Cryme Tyme – 38%
Legacy vs. Kofi Kingston/CM Punk – 35%
William Regal/Layla vs. Jamie Noble/Mickie James – 27%

John Morrison/The Miz vs. Cryme Tyme

This is a feud over who has the better internet show. The choice is a bit odd as Legacy vs. Punk/Kingston would have been for the Raw Tag Team Titles. Morrison and JTG get things going and take turns driving each other into the corner. Not exactly a thrilling start. JTG gets in a back elbow to the jaw for the first real offense before it’s off to Miz vs. Shad with the big man giving JTG something like a reverse Alabama Slam onto Miz for two.

It’s back to Morrison as the announcers talk about underwear. Miz and Morrison are both sent out to the floor before Shad throws JTG onto both of them for a cool power display. Back in and John drives Shad into the corner to take over on the knee. We hit a leg lock from Miz followed by a half crab from Morrison. Shad pretty easily kicks Miz away and makes the tag off to JTG.

Everything breaks down and JTG gets beaten down for a change as Miz questions the fans thinking he can’t wrestle. Miz hits a running corner clothesline for two and we hit the chinlock. JTG gets up and drops Miz long enough for the hot tag to Shad. Everything breaks down and Shad gets two off a spinebuster to Morrison. Miz kicks Shad in the knee though, setting up Morrison’s Midnight Drive (flip neckbreaker) for the pin at 10:22.

Rating: D+. This felt more like the opener with the match never really going anywhere after the first few minutes. Just like Mysterio vs. Kane, this started fast but never got off the ground. Maybe there wasn’t enough heat from two internet shows that most people didn’t watch to warrant a pay per view match. If only there was an option for some titles.

Tiffany is something like a nun, Brie Bella is Cleopatra, Natalya is a cop and Eve Torres is a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.

Jericho can’t get Great Khali’s help in the main event either.

Intercontinental Title: Santino Marella vs. ???

Marella is a goofy Italian who somehow landed Beth Phoenix, a good looking blonde in great shape. He’s also been talking about how he’s going to surpass Honky Tonk Man’s record for the longest Intercontinental Title reign, which included the Honk-A-Meter. Before the opponent is revealed, Santino insults various athletes who come to Phoenix and fade away. The list includes Shaquille O’Neal, who happens to be here. Here are the choices for his opponent:

Honky Tonk Man – 35%
Roddy Piper – 34%
Goldust – 31%

The word duh comes to mind though that’s WAY closer than I was expecting. Before the match, Honky Tonk Man says Santino could hold the title for ten years and it wouldn’t mean as much as his reign. Eh to be fair that’s probably not too far from the truth. A dance off ensues until Honky Tonk hits a few right hands and grabs a headlock, only to have Beth trip Honky Tonk for the DQ at 1:05.

Santino yells at Beth for a bit, followed by the other options coming out for the big beatdown and a lot of cheering.

Maryse is a French maid (of course), Layla is Princess Layla, Victoria is a banana (she has appeal) and Mickie James is Lara Croft.

We recap Undertaker vs. Big Show. Big Show knocked Undertaker out to prove that Undertaker was mortal and unable to take the big right hand. Undertaker came back and said he wasn’t done fighting yet so they’ll have another fight here.

Undertaker vs. Big Show

Last Man Standing – 49%
I Quit – 42%
Knockout Match – 9%

Smackdown General Manager Vickie Guerrero says I Quit won in a fairly inoffensive gaffe. They slug it out to start with Big Show knocking him over the top and out to the floor. Undertaker is thrown into the timekeeper’s area so he comes back with a chair to the head. Back in and Show easily runs Undertaker over before kicking him out to the floor. Show misses a chair shot though, allowing Undertaker to drive it into his throat for an eight count. Undertaker starts hammering away but gets clotheslined for his efforts.

Show just starts pounding on Undertaker’s ribs before trying a chokeslam, which is reversed into a DDT for nine. This of course begs the question of why he didn’t just immediately throw the KO Punch since he was easily pounding on the ribs. Show takes a turnbuckle pad off but gets sent into it himself (because duh) so they can head outside. Undertaker is whipped into the steps over and over before they stop fighting to load up the announcers’ tables.

A superkick (well moderately super) puts Undertaker over the barricade and a chokeslam sends him through the table for nine. Show yells at Undertaker for not quitting but Undertaker comes back with right hands. Another DDT plants Show inside but Old School is countered into a weak chokeslam for nine more. The KO Punch gets the same so Show caves Undertaker’s head in with a chair. Show leans down to talk some trash but gets pulled into the Hell’s Gate choke, knocking him out for the ten count at 19:23.

Rating: B-. This could have been a lot worse and the good ending drags it up a bit higher. You had to expect these two to have a low and plodding match but the idea of two big guys hitting each other a lot worked well enough. This was more of an old school Undertaker match and while he’s not exactly what he used to be, this was still good enough and better than I was expecting to have to sit through.

Raw General Manager Mike Adamle (a hopeless buffoon) won’t give Jericho leniency either. Jericho gets a message on his phone that seems to give him some hope.

It’s time for the Halloween costume results with all of the Divas being brought out. Mickie James wins and they don’t even bother with percentages. A big brawl breaks out with the good ones being left to pose.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match which is really more of a question of how badly will Hardy alone dominate the other options. Hardy and HHH have been feuding for a few months though they’re both still faces. Kozlov is just there despite most people not being interested.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. ???

Jeff Hardy – 57%
Jeff Hardy/Vladimir Kozlov – 38%
Vladimir Kozlov – 5%

Yeah that’s not a surprise with the Hardy options totaling 95% and even the triple threat was blown out by Jeff alone. They go with some basic wrestling to start as Jeff works on a hammerlock on the mat. An armdrag sets up an armbar but Jeff can’t hit the Twist of Fate. JR thinks Hardy’s green belt means money tonight. Now you’re just stretching dude. Jeff tries to get to the top but gets sent crashing back down to the floor.

HHH sends him shoulder first into the post and it’s time for an armbar. Jeff sweeps the legs and drops a legdrop between the champ’s legs for two but the slingshot dropkick is nicely countered into a spinebuster. We hit a crossface of all things to stay on Jeff’s shoulder until Hardy rolls backwards into a rollup for the break. They head outside with HHH being sent into the steps and Jeff nailing Poetry in Motion against the barricade.

Back in and a pair of Whispers in the Wind get two on the champ as the fans are getting more into this. The Twist of Fate is countered but Jeff reverses the Pedigree into a rollup for two in a hot sequence. Now the Twist connects for two and there’s a Swanton for no cover. A second one hits knees but Jeff knocks him outside, only to completely miss a plancha. HHH goes down anyway but HHH crotches him back inside, setting up the Pedigree to retain at 15:36.

Rating: B. These two had some strong chemistry together and it was clear that Hardy was getting closer and closer every single time. HHH getting the title again wasn’t the most popular idea but he was having great matches and giving Hardy a great rub in matches like this one. There’s also the idea that Hardy never covered after hitting the Swanton, meaning there was no way of knowing if he had the pin there or not. Good stuff here and another nail in Kozlov’s main event coffin.

We recap Batista vs. Chris Jericho. Batista became #1 contender last month at No Mercy by beating John Bradshaw Layfield and gets his chance to reclaim his title here. Jericho is on a roll with his holier/more intelligent than thou heel character but Batista is just a monster. There isn’t even a gimmick here with the fans getting to vote on a guest referee.

Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Batista

Steve Austin – 74%
Shawn Michaels – 22%
Randy Orton – 4%

Jericho is defending and the fans chant for Austin, much to the champ’s annoyance. For some reason Jericho decides to slap Batista in the face to start, earning himself some shoulders to the ribs in the corner. That means it’s time for a breather on the floor and a walk up the aisle but Austin says if he leaves he loses the title. I would picture Austin going up the aisle and throwing him back in but I guess Steve has mellowed a bit.

Back in and an elbow to the jaw followed by a suplex gives Batista a two count. Jericho tosses him outside for a breather and a baseball slide. Batista’s knee gets caught in the ropes so Jericho can have a target. A leglock sets up a chop block and it’s time to crank on the ankle. That’s switched over to a chinlock before Batista has to kick away a Walls of Jericho attempt.

Jericho charges into a boot to the face and Batista’s leg is fine enough for a powerslam. It bangs up his knee though and Jericho grabs the Walls which is quickly swapped for a half crab, guaranteeing that Batista doesn’t tap. Austin has to pull Jericho off when he Batista grabs the ropes, doing his first noteworthy thing in the last ten minutes. A Boss Man Slam (not a tilt-a-whirl side slam Cole) gets two on the champ but Jericho goes back to the knee to escape the Batista Bomb.

Batista misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post but he’s still able to break up a superplex attempt. A good looking top rope shoulder gets two on Jericho but it’s time for the ref bump with Batista running Austin over by mistake. The Codebreaker drops Batista so here’s Shawn Michaels (Jericho’s big rival) for a comically slow count (as in nearly fifteen seconds to get to two).

Batista spears Jericho but JBL comes out to beat up Shawn. Here’s Randy Orton to knock Austin down so Jericho can hit Batista in the head with the belt for two. Austin gets back up with a Stunner for Orton, leaving Batista to give Jericho a spinebuster and the Batista Bomb to win the title at 17:06.

Rating: B-. This was fine and even good at times but absolutely nothing worth getting excited over. Batista winning the title sent the fans home happy but it’s really early for Jericho to lose the title less than two months after he won it. To be fair though this was just a quick reign as Batista would drop the belt back to Jericho eight days later at the 800th episode of Monday Night Raw. The referee stuff was nice for a change after last year where Austin was absolutely nothing. It also helps that this stuff made sense instead of just being there as random violence.

Overall Rating: C+. The show was perfectly fine but it was clear that the voting gimmick had outlived its usefulness, hence why this was the final year. The wrestling was a slightly downgraded version of the previous year’s as the final three matches all worked but the stuff earlier in the show wasn’t as strong. I’ll take a decent show over a mess though and that’s about all there is here.

 

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