Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2010: Classic Show

Royal Rumble 2010
Date: January 31, 2010
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

First off, love that announcing trio. Having 6 guys was WAY too much for PPVs. I’m excited for this Rumble. Yes the title matches are easy to see, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be bad. Sometimes you need predictable matches and this is one of them. The matches look good on paper and the build was all there. The Rumble winner is pretty up in the air actually. That being said the show is starting so it’s time to shut up. Actually it isn’t but you get the point. Let’s get to it.

The video is what you would expect: a look back. Basic but well done as usual.

ECW Title: Ezekiel Jackson vs. Christian

They’ve built this up great as it finally feels like the night Christian is going down. I’m not so sure though. Jackson is a freaking scary man indeed. My stream is choppy so this is kind of like a fast moving slide show mixed with good audio. There goes Regal after a few minutes. Striker talks too fast at times. Cole sounds sick or something. We hit the formula based stuff which is likely the best way to do this.

Since Jackson is still limited in the ring, it’s probably best to have him be carried by the far more experienced and better Christian. We’re in our second chinlock of the match already. Seriously Striker: CALM DOWN! Christian hits the jumping reverse elbow making him awesome. And then he does those stupid claps to take that away. “Hmm, I have him down and I’ve walked around in a circle so he doesn’t know where he is.

I’ll clap since that doesn’t give him a tip at all.” Jackson hits a big clothesline and we get LARIOTO from Striker. Jackson is really limited. Like Monty Brown levels of limited. I love that slingshot kick that Christian does in the corner. Why should I care about who last won the title where? No one says a word and Striker says nothing? That’s very amusing. Sleeper time. And there’s the Killswitch out of freaking nowhere for the pin. What the heck was that???

Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill big man vs. little man and the more I think about it the more I like the ending. Christian couldn’t hang with Zeke going head to head so he stopped trying to and got a quick win. I actually like that one.

Cryme Tyme both want to be in the Rumble but only one spot is available. Apparently they’ve managed to trade Khali’s spot for a kiss from Tiffany. Apparently not. Gender stereotype humor fails and Khali imitates Urkel. Shad is almost able to look eye to eye with Khali. This is so stupid. Miz comes in and Teddy, who has no authority on this show, makes the US Title match.

Rhodes sucks up to Orton and throws Ted under the bus. I’d bet on the same thing happening later with Ted,

US Title: MVP vs. The Miz

Talk about two guys that have gone in completely opposite directions. Miz used to look like a joke and is now awesome and MVP used to look awesome and now is a borderline joke. Something tells me he’s winning tonight though. MVP was US Champion what, back in 2007 and he’s still in the same place how long later? There’s a big MIZ IS AWESOME chant. Or was it AWFUL? Either one is a good sign.

MVP is all over him to start which points to Miz hanging onto the belt. Ok, we get it: MVP hung out with some chick from The View. It means nothing at all. Ah there we go. Miz is back now. He’s grown more than anyone else I’ve ever seen in the past two years. We get it also: MVP used to be in prison. Let it die already. MVP is just a failure as a face. His character is designed to be a heel but we can’t have street wise heels that look like stereotypes of course.

Ok, so MVP hits a face crusher and literally 12 seconds later the Ballin Elbow hits. Are we supposed to believe that Miz isn’t going to get up in that amount of time? Seriously? There’s a Pounce from MVP and called so much by Striker. Oh, period. Wouldn’t want to forget that.

I actually don’t know who’s going to win here which is rare in matches like these but it’s a nice plus. And Miz hits a rollup as MVP is getting back in for the pin. And that’s what he needs: wins, even by fluke, that are clean. MVP attacks him after the match and is heavily booed. Please let that be a heel turn. Cole implies it’s not. Dang it.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all. The ending was great here as it literally came out of nowhere. Miz needs more wins like these but it gives him more and more credibility every time which is what his character needs at the moment. I haven’t seen them get a character’s development much better than his in a LONG time and I’m loving it.

Jericho and Show continue their bromance. R-Truth laughs at Jericho and says it’s every man for himself. It’s better than it sounds but it’s still dumb.

Orton is walking. Yes indeed he is. And there’s Ted to say he’s here for him. No Cody in sight though and I was right with my prediction.

Ad for Raw. I love that they feel the need to advertise a show that you likely would have had to see in order to buy this show.

Soldiers are here. Oh they’re from the National Guard.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

And the champion comes out first for no apparent reason. Sheamus is another character that has gotten a solid push from nowhere and I’m liking it. It’s working bette than Bradshaw’s when they did the same thing and I think that’s because there’s nothing of his past to compare it to. Bradshaw had nothing to go off of in the main event either but we had known him for years and he sucked. Orton gets a bit of a pop.

Please: give him a face title run. It could work. A heel vs. heel title match isn’t something I would have guessed on but it should be awesome. I’m pulling for the Irish dude just to prevent anything resembling Orton vs. HHH or Cena again. We get the big match intros too. Orton gets a straight up face pop. Sheamus gets heat but it’s mild. Still though, likely his best ever. It’s weird seeing Orton not being taller.

Sheamus is getting a bit of heat here. I like it. MASSIVE Randy chant. The fans Vince. LISTEN TO THEM. Yep, he’s wrestling life a face too. Sheamus is dominating here as he should. I’m glad they never went anywhere with the kick he gave Lawler. Orton goes for the knee which makes a lot of sense here. There has been talk of Sheamus holding the belt until Mania. I like it. We’ve begged for a new main event guy and we’ve gotten one.

Giving him a long reign is making him far more credible as a champion and main event player. It’s a brilliant move and I think it’s working. Orton STAYS ON THE KNEE! Oh blessed psychology how I love you! Sheamus works on the arm of all things. It’s different if nothing else. There’s the stupid boo/yay thing. Fans are more or less completely behind Orton which is something Vince needs to listen to.

Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge but his knee gives out. See what psychology can do for you? Orton hits that elevated DDT that is varying degrees of awesome. They’re trying so hard to have him be heel in this and it’s failing epically. The Punt, which again is more of a freaking place kick but what do I know. Vince started the XFL so obviously he’s smarter than I am. It misses of course because that never hits on PPV for some reason.

Oh wait forgot HIAC. There’s likely a reason for that one. Rhodes runs in and attacks Sheamus but the RKO hits, meaning Sheamus keeps the belt. YES! Came out of nowhere but whatever. The fans are calling for the RKO on Rhodes but they settle for a choke instead. Ted comes down and gets that beating he deserves. Grr and there goes the stream again! Orton more or less fires them, HOPEFULLY turning face. And Sheamus kicks Orton in the head and everyone leaves him there. Not bad at all.

Rating: B. I liked this a lot more than I should have. The psychology was all working here and it played into the match later on which is nice. The DQ ending kind of sucked as I would have preferred Sheamus to get a pin but this worked just fine I think. Legacy is FINALLY over though which is the far more important thing.

We recap Mickie vs. McCool which is by far the best build to a match I’ve seen in years. It’s even better than the Mark Henry vs. Viscera match. Short version: McCool and Layla were saying that Mickie was fat and it led to this. It’s a lot better than it sounds, trust me.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool

I’m actually pumped for this thing if you can believe that. Odds are it’s going to suck but whatever. The video had Beth in it which implies she’ll be here tonight. Sweet goodness change Michelle’s music. I freak can’t stand it. McCool cuts a bad promo before the match. Mickie isn’t here apparently?

And here’s Layla in the fat suit. This was stupid Friday but cute I guess and now…never mind as Mickie is here. And it’s a 20 second match as Mickie freaking murders her. Ok then. And they bring out food and poor it on the heels. Good to know.

Rating: N/A. Not sure if I like this or not. Mickie dominating is good as it ends this quickly, but it feels flat otherwise. I think I like it though. Yeah let’s go with that.

Ad for Elimination Chamber. Yeah nothing says SPECIAL gimmick match more than two in one night baby!

We recap Rey vs. Taker, which more or less is Rey won a contender’s match and then Batista is a whiny man. Something tells me that’s your ending because he has muscles and therefore he’s a good wrestler, at least in Vince’s eyes.

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio

They call this the biggest match in Rey’s career. Yep, far bigger than winning the title at Mania I’m sure. As bad as a champion that he is, that belt looks awesome on Taker’s waist. More big match intros which while they’re usually good, they kind of don’t work for Taker for some reason. This is likely to rock or suck with no real in between. This is like a wet dream for Vince: both guys are big faces so why wouldn’t this work?

Taker at 299 pounds sounds odd for some reason. Rey gets freaking launched to the floor but lands on his feet. Nice indeed. Taker has done maybe two moves and he’s put Rey on the floor twice. This is all Taker so far. Thankfully the 619 misses. Taker goes for the Tombstone but Rey uses the ancient Chinese principle of kicking his feet to get out of it. Taker of course messes up his knee because that’s all he can do in most matches anymore.

His hip is in a lot of legit pain at this point so it’s likely not a ton of acting. We get the Asai Moonsault for the Japanese fans out there. Taker’s chest looks the same as Michelle’s used to look like. I wonder if they got them done in the same place? They seem like they’re killing time, which screams BATISTA to me.

Surprisingly enough though it doesn’t come as Taker just more or less casually hits the Last Ride after countering a flippy. Where’s Norcal when I need him? Oh yeah at a bar with muscle guys.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t thrilled here at all. The only good thing was that there was a clean ending which was my main concern here. It’s two more old guys in the main event but at least they’re popular so that’s all I can ask for. Not awful, but underwhelming.

Shawn and Kane talk. HHH and Shawn talk. Greatness personified.

I freaking LOVE that video package about the numbers.

Royal Rumble

Dolph Ziggler is first and Evan Bourne is second. Ok then. And the Zig Zag hits a few minutes in. He pulls a Davey Boy Smith though and doesn’t make sure he goes over. The Shooting Star hits and Punk is third. With the roll he’s been on lately he needs a LONG run here. He starts off hot by throwing out both guys and has time to cut a promo. The heat is there, the look is there and the ability is there.

He has to job to the old guys though right? Number four is one of Cryme Tyme. Oh it’s JTG. Please….make it quick. Hey I got my wish! It lasted just a few seconds as we get our second promo of the night. I love Punk in case I didn’t make that clear. Fifth is Khali. Don’t you freaking put Punk out to this imbecile! You know they will though. Please, sacrifice Serena or something. I beg of you Vince, use your freaking brain.

Nope, Punk gets his head kickedin. Oh I get it: Khali is a “fun” character so that makes the idiocy ok. He gets the vice but it doesn’t last long enough and…Beth Phoenix is 6th? Well ok then. It’s different if nothing else. Beth gets picked up and placed on the apron where she kisses Khali before ELIMINATING HIM!! Punk hits her with the GTS after a brief skirmish. Didn’t see this coming. Seventh is Zach Ryder. This is odd indeed.

Beth is odd as we get some awesome music from Ryder. Punk tries to recruit Ryder and then hits him to MASSIVE face pops. He’s alone again as this is awesome. It’s another promo. Kane or Show will put him out soon enough. He says he’s better than whoever is next and you can smell the elimination coming from here. And it’s HHH. Bye Punk. Have fun in the belly of HHH’s ego. His intro takes the better part of ever so at least he’s consistent.

Hey Punk actually lasts until McIntyre is 9th. And HHH puts out Punk to get his ego up again. Yep, can’t have these young talented and over guys taking the place of guys like HHH. HHH is called the future of the company. That’s a scary thought. DiBiase is 10th. We’re 1/3 of the way through this. Oh great. Morrison is 11th. Nothing of note is happening at all. McIntyre takes Starship Pain and here’s HHH to take his head off anyway.

Kane is 12th, To recap it’s HHH, Kane, DiBiase, Morrison and McIntyre in there at the moment. The IC Title boys take a double chokeslam and it’s all Kane meaning he’ll be out soon or last a long time. And HHH saves DiBiase. Ok then. I guess the whole end your career thing is forgives. Cody Rhodes comes up on the monitor and Striker says it must be Rhodes. What would we do without you Matty? Legacy dominates…kind of. Morrison is acrobatic as all goodness.

Rhodes underrated in the ring. Striker says he’s the seed of the Dream. BAD FREAKING IMAGE MAN! Kane of course is moving and Cole can’t tell McIntyre and HHH apart. MVP is 14th. Miz jumps him in the aisle and blasts him with the belt. Know what would be nice now? A shot of the ring. Oh there it is. Morrison hits a SICK springboard spinkick to the head of McIntyre. MVP is taken out as I’m pretty sure HHH is going to win here.

My guess is Shawn vs. HHH somewhere down the line because of Shawn’s incessant ego. Carlito is 15th and apparently he’s interesting. Yeah that’s nosense if I’ve ever heard it. He hits a nice springboard reverse elbow to Legacy. That was nice. MVP will likely run in and attack Miz later. Nothing predictable at all there. HHH takes the Backstabber as do a lot of people. Holy crap he’s dominating. Sixteenth is Miz. Amazingly MVP doesn’t jump him. That’ll be next I guess.

The Skull Crushing Finale hits Carlito. The fans pop like a cherry pie for Miz vs. Morrison and here’s MVP to put himself and Miz out. Legacy has HHH in trouble and of course he doesn’t go out. Carlito hangs onto the rope and stays in. Number 17 is Matt Hardy to a huge pop. This crowd is awesome. To continue the trend he dominates and hits a bunch of people before Kane puts him out and Kane is out by HHH.

You really can see it coming. I hope I need glasses. Spinebusters all around. A hot crowd pops for him so that validates this I suppose. HBK is 18th and I think I feel a showdown of 1990 proportions coming. Rhodes and Carlito and DiBiase are gone. Ok we have Shawn, McIntyre, Morrison and HHH in there at the moment. Ok take out Morrison and the showdown is pretty clear.

Shawn has the second most eliminations in Rumble history apparently. Yep it’s showdown time and there’s the clock. It’ll be a jobber and…never mind it’s Cena. Vince the Survivor Series bombed with this main event so why wouldn’t this do it too? And of course he beats up DX. A double You Can’t See Me is booed to an extent. HHH stops an FU and takes a Pedigree AND HHH IS SUPERKICKED OUT OF THE FREAKING MATCH! I am STUNNED. TAKE THAT MELTZER!!!

Shelton is in now and I’m switching my bet to Cena. Shawn has put Shelton out like three years in a row or something. This is his eighth consecutive Rumble. Wow I wouldn’t have guessed that one. Cena ends Shawn’s streak and puts out Shelton. Holy Mania rematch Batman. Yoshi Tatsu is 21st. I like this guy for some reason. Of course Striker has a dumb name for him: the Poison Fist of the Pacific Rim. Cena dumps him in a few seconds and we’re back to Shawn and Cena.

Nothing overdone about that AT ALL is there? Ok Atlanta is allowed to do the WOOs. Big Show is 22nd. Show almost goes out but saves himself. Cena goes for an FU but it misses. Shawn has to skin the cat (what a name I tell you) because Chin Music misses. Mark Henry is 23rd. Well they’re having some big names in there at least. I still can’t get over HHH being out already. It’s a curveball if nothing else. Henry goes for a slam can can’t get it.

Why do I have a feeling he’s not the world’s strongest man? He gets the slam a bit later but then almost gets an FU. Masters is number 24. Have to have some jobbers I guess. He press slams Shawn and of course doesn’t throw him out. Instead he puts the Masterlock on Show and he gets tossed for it. Henry and Show go at it again as we have a clock. It’s R-Truth….AND HE PUTS OUT SHOW AND HENRY.

I guess there is a youth movement. It’s Truth, Cena and Michaels here. He shows his TNA connection by hitting Cena with the Stroke. The fans are chanting boring. This hasn’t been bad at all. Swagger is 26th as Norcal pops. This is his first Rumble. I wouldn’t have guessed that. Vader Bombs all around. NO! Stream went out! Never mind it’s back!

Kofi is 27th. There goes Truth. Jericho is 28th. Kofi put out Truth in case you were wondering. He follows that up by kicking the heck out of Shawn and then gets thrown by Cena. All three are down and here’s 29. HOLY CRAP IT’S EDGE! Ok it’s not really shocking but still cool moment. Oh yeah he’s a face. Just like he should be. Spears all around and we might not have a surefire winner now.

There goes Jericho and Edge is domination. Sweet the Edgecution is back! Fans are WAY into this. Shame Batista will be 30th. It would have made sense to just have it be Edge in at 30. Ok final four are Cena, Shawn, Batissta and Edge. Naturally Batista is dominating. Anyone of these guys could win. Edge spears him down and Cena FUs Edge so everyone is down. Shawn nips up to another great pop. That’s one of those moves that just plain works.

Shawn is dominating here and Striker screws up again by saying that Edge has had no vigor. Shawn is dominating here and this is exciting me. Cena gets kicked and si does Big Dave. Edge clotheslines Shawn to the apron and then gets superkicked back in. DAVE PUTS SHAWN OUT! The crowd just goes dead silent. That came from nowhere. This is wide freaking open at this point. WOW I haven’t heard a crowd die like that ever.

That…might not have been what was supposed to happen. He goes nuts an goes back in, beating up referees. Could this be a Shawn HEEL TURN??? I certainly freaking hope so. More referees come down as Shawn looks freaking crushed. Striker says this is heartbreaking (no pun intended I’m sure) as he says Shawn has never achieved this. If he means beating Taker he’s an idiot. He’s also never achieved a good buyrate but we’ll ignore that.

Ok so it’s Edge, Batista and Cena. Cena reverses the Batista Bomb and Batista reverses the FU and there goes Batista! This would suggest Edge winning but I’m not so sure. He sets for the spear with those great visuals of his and it misses of course. Cena goes for a clothesline and EDGE WINS IT! YEAH!

Take that people screaming this was going to be predicable! Love that ending, even though it’s the same thing they did with Cena but not as exciting/sweet. This is what we needed too: a FRESH face that is going to get some POPS. Great move all around and a great Rumble match.

Rating: A. Very solid Rumble here. Edge winning was a very pleasant shock and I liked it a lot. They had the star power in there tonight and no Santino or Duggan or jokes like that who are just going to waste time and spots. The formula works great when it clicks and this was no exception. I was bored until HHH got dumped but it wasn’t awful before that. Once he’s gone though, it’s straight through the roof. Very good Rumble and likely in the top five ever of them.

Overall Rating: A-. I was going back and forth between B- and C+. The whole show was indeed nothing great, but there was nothing that bad really. The right people won, for the most part they won clean, Orton is a face…I think, Shawn is snapping, Legacy is OVER, and Edge is back as a top level face.

This was a very good show and if you want to say it was predictable, let me know so I can laugh at you. Fun show and worth checking out, just don’t expect a classic. Edited: what the heck am I thinking? This show was great. A-.

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TLC 2011 Preview

It’s the end of the year and I’m really not looking forward to this.I’ve made no secret out of the fact that I think this show looks weak.  I thought it might be fun to compare last year’s card to this year’s.

 

IC Title: last year we had Ziggler vs. Swagger vs. Kofi in a three way ladder match which was rather entertaining and had a creative ending.  This year, it’s Cody defending against an announcer in a non-ladder match.  Advantage: 2010.

 

US Title: last year it was defended in a dark match.  This year it should be Ryder finally getting the title he’s chased for four months.  Advantage: 2011.

 

Divas: last year it was a tag team tables match, this year they’re not on the card.  Advantage: push.  Seriously, the Divas not being on the card is a GOOD thing in 2011.

 

Featured ladder match: last year it was Sheamus vs. Morrison in what I thought was the best match of the night.  This year it’s HHH vs. Nash in a match that SUCKED in 2003 and now it’s 8 years later.  Advantage: you do the math.

 

Featured tables match: last year it was Miz vs. Orton for the title.  This year it’s Orton vs. Barrett in a pretty well built grudge match.  Advantage: 2011.  That match last year sucked.

 

TLC Match: last year it was a fatal fourway with Kane defending against Edge, Del Rio and Mysterio in what I thoguht was a good match.  This year it’s a triple threat with practically no heat.  Advantage: 2010.

 

Featured chairs match: last year it was Cena vs. Barrett and a definitive ending to the Cena vs. Nexus feud.  This year it’s Show vs. Henry for the Smackdown Title.  Advantage: 2010, but not in a total runaway as Show vs. Henry has been a decent feud.

 

John Cena: last year, in the main event.  This year, not on the card.  Game, set and match – 2010.

 

I just don’t care about this show.  It hasn’t been built up that well at all and I’m not sure what the main event actually is.  You would assume the TLC match due to it being the namesake, but that wasn’t the case last year.  I REALLY don’t want HHH vs. Nash going on last due to black hole levels of suck.  The Raw Title could go last but I’m not interested in that match at all.  Show vs. Henry just isn’t a PPV ending match.  In short, there isn’t a big time match this year and that’s really hurting the show.

 

As for predictions, I’ll take Punk, Henry, HHH (but I have a hunch on Nash), Cody and Ryder.

 

Your thoughts/predictions?




No Surrender 2010 – The 2011 Show Is Tomorrow So Does It Hold Up?

No Surrender 2010
Date: September 5, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Taz, Mike Tenay

The main thing tonight is the semi-final matches in the world title tournament. They should be good but the rest of the card seems a bit lackluster. It’s not bad but I just don’t really care about what I’m seeing here. Dreamer vs. AJ on PPV? Really? This should be ok though as TNA PPVs can often surprise you. Let’s get to it.

We open with shots of the four guys in the semi-finals getting here earlier in the day. The video is your standard let’s hear from all four guys and get their opinions on the tournament. Nothing special at all but the idea works.

Tag Titles: Generation Me vs. Motor City Machine Guns

Ok so apparently London Brawling isn’t here so this is your replacement. Shelley and Jeremy start us off with some very nifty mat work. Shelley is in shorts here which is a weird look on him. Taz implies the challengers have an attitude now, which probably means a heel turn. Apparently Generation Me are Christian athletes. Nothing wrong with that, but interesting that this comes up just around the time they turn heel.

The fans call them the Bucks of course because they have to be smart right? Oh wait that’s the last name of Gen Me here right? It is as we prove again how stupid the name Generation Me is. Young Bucks is hardly a bad name. Shelley with a reverse Boston Crab into a surfboard. They’ve both been in there the whole time and just as I say that Sabin comes in.

We crank it up as Max hits an INSANE backflip into a Diamond Cutter. Neckbreaker on Shelly on the apron and Shelly may have a bad neck now. It turns into a gymnastics routine, which is always fun if nothing else. These are perfect choices for openers as they’re very exciting and gets the crowd going. I’d prefer them in the middle of the show though as they can breathe life into the show later if things start to drag.

The ring looks a bit smaller than usual here for some reason. Sabin gets the hot tag and it’s on again. Springboard Tornado DDT gets two. Cue R-Truth’s opening line as this is the part where we crank it up. Sabin and Max slug it out in the ring and another tornado DDT is blocked. Gen Me kick the heck out of Shelley and set up for More Bang For Your Buck. In a very innovative counter, Jeremy goes for a superkick but Shelley grabs it and throws the foot into Max’s head. Skull and Bones end it clean.

Rating: B. Solid opener as always between these two. They know how to just make things exciting and fire up the crowd, which is always a great thing to see in the opener. The Guns are without a doubt the best team in the world today and highlight the division about as well as anyone can. Very fast paced match that has me wanting to see the rest of the show.

Post match Gen Me jumps the Guns and beat up Shelley and continue the focus on his neck, including an elevated DDT to the floor. We get an X thrown up from the referee for dramatic effect. Nice to see them as heels for once. Shelley walks off with some help.

Taz and Mike welcome us to the show, 25 minutes in. They run down the main points of the card, which we’ve already bought.

X Division Title: Sabu vs. Douglas Williams

They say that this is the only singles title match tonight, which means the TV Title still isn’t on the line, which is a good thing. These X Factor things are again annoying. We get all these things already but we need a Powerpoint presentation to tell us them again? The Bombay, Michigan thing always makes me chuckle. Williams out moves Sabu to start as Sabu isn’t sure what to do here.

He’s one of those guys that can be decent in the ring but when he gets bad he gets really bad. It depends on how insane he goes I guess. We start on the mat a lot which is a nice change of pace. Slingshot legdrop is kind of a slingshot double boot as it sets up the one arm camel clutch. That name always makes me chuckle.

A table is set up at ringside but we get into the ring before it can be used. The fans of course aren’t happy about us sticking to actual wrestling. Taz talks about his rivalry with Sabu, which is a good thing. I’ve long since thought Lawler needs to remind fans that he used to be a wrestler and even a world champion. Most young fans probably don’t know that and it probably would give him credibility.

Sabu brings in a chair but does nothing with it again. Triple jump moonsault is just barely ok as it gets two. Loud Sabu chant which will be validation to keep him around according to Dixie. We hit the mat again and Williams uses some insane spinning chinlock. This hasn’t been great but it’s no trainwreck at all. Sabu goes No Mercy with a springboard back elbow. Williams kicks the chair into Sabu’s balls and gets a gutwrench suplex for two.

Sabu goes for a big assisted dive but can’t quite get it so he just jumps, and I use that word loosely, over the top. Williams is put on the table but Sabu goes through it instead. Was there a point to that being in the match at all? I mean what did that add at all? Hebner tries to get rid of the chair, allowing a belt shot to the head of Sabu to make Williams retain. Well at least he kept the belt.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad really. It’s no classic or anything, but this was much better than I was expecting. Sabu didn’t go completely insane and as usual, it was far better that way. Williams definitely should have won and thankfully he did. This was definitely a passable match and a nice surprise in a way.

Anderson says he’s going to preach tonight and gets the crowd to say they’re jerks. I hate that gimmick.

Madison Rayne vs. Velvet Skye

Madison in leather is something I could get used to. Tara interferes almost immediately as we get an early sex based chant. Dang I hate this crowd at times. Rayne goes for the head of Skye to start as this isn’t as good as expected. Knees to the crotch of Madison makes Taz wonder if that would hurt.

Are there any Knockouts other than the BP and Tara? If there are they never appear on TV. Tara goes for the helmet but Love makes the save. And then Velvet just gets a DDT to get the win. It was as abrupt as it sounds.

Rating: D. This just didn’t do it for me. It was on the exact level as a Divas match with very little wrestling but then again who cares about that when you have the looks? That was only half sarcasm mind you. The division has more or less died over this year and it didn’t get any better here. Pretty bad match.

Hardy, who looks a little blue, says tonight is for RVD. Well of course it is.

Abyss vs. Rhyno

This is falls count anywhere. Rhyno hits a nice dive to take out Abyss and we head to the back. They fight out near the amusement park as Taz is talking about a corndog. I haven’t had one of those in forever. Back into the Impact Zone as it’s your standard one punch knocks you three feet match here. The man beats goes into a trash can to give Abyss control.

The fans want Janice, once again proving how annoying they can be as they cheer the heel. Back on the floor again as Rhyno throws Abyss through part of the stage, where he is followed by Rhyno. The fans chant WE CAN’T SEE, which is true actually. We cut to Tenay and Taz, as I’m guessing Abyss needed a Twinkie break or something. And here comes Rhyno through the other side of the stage.

That gets two for Abyss so he rips apart the guard rail. Rhyno avoids it and hits a running clothesline because the Gore wasn’t appropriate there I guess? The fans chant for Rhyno, showing how fickle they are. Gore misses and a chokeslam onto a trash can gets two. He gets Janice but a Gore puts him down. Naturally it gets two, proving that the Stevie Kick is more powerful than the Gore. Black Hole Slam only gets two which is a surprise. Rhyno gores the guard rail and a Black Hole Slam ends it.

Rating: D+. Just a run of the mill weapons based match. Rhyno kicking out of the first Slam and Abyss doing the same with the Gore were nice surprises but they got no talking or reaction at all. This wasn’t horrible, but at the same time this just didn’t do much for me. Decent little weapons match, but the falls count anywhere portion was pretty pointless at the end of the day.

We recap Jarrett/Joe vs. Nash/Sting. I still don’t get the point of Joe being in this but whatever. This is one of the aspects of the THEY storyline, which isn’t a good thing as it needs to be toned down, but whatever. That and political storylines rarely work in wrestling, so let’s keep doing them right? This video is like 4 minutes long for no apparent reason.

Samoa Joe/Jeff Jarrett vs. Sting/Kevin Nash

Hogan isn’t here again, once again proving his worth to the company. Nash and Sting have the Wolfpack music going here. Sting and Joe start as we talk more about the vague references to things. Taz talks about the politics, which are RIVETING, yes RIVETING I say, to the casual fan that doesn’t get that meaning. Sting in a TNA shirt just looks weird. Joes takes down Nash with a big running jumping kick.

Nash comes in as we talk about how there is no Impact this week. Great to know that on a PPV rather than the TV show but whatever. Nash hits the side slam which is one of my favorite moves. And now we talk about politics and behind the scenes stuff, which makes my head hurt. I watch wrestling for wrestling, not a political drama. Stinger Splash and Jarrett is in trouble.

The crowd cheers for Sting, yet again not getting the point of being fans. Double clothesline and Sting and Jarrett both go down. Hot tag to Joe and the cleaning of house begins. Jarrett gets the bat and pops Sting a few times to a semi-heel (as heel as you can get in TNA that is) and the Clutch from Joe ends it as Sting is out.

Rating: D+. Not bad here but too short to mean much. The idea is that Jarrett shouldn’t have used the bat but did anyway due to insanity or something like that. It’s more overdoing an angle which is the last three months in a nutshell. Yet again a lack of answers which will lead to them just saying the same things over and over again.

We talk about AJ vs. Dreamer, which is the idea of EV 2.0 vs. Fourtune. The video really shows how messed up this feud is as most fans are likely to agree with Fourtune rather than the ECW guys. At least I do.

AJ Styles vs. Tommy Dreamer

I Quit rules. AJ hides behind the ramp to jump Dreamer as he comes through the curtain. Not a bad idea I guess. Shame that it doesn’t work though and we’re off and running. Styles shouts that Dreamer sucks while Dreamer chokes him. Dreamer gets a seated full nelson as he goes No Mercy as well. This has been more or less all Tommy so far, which gives me hope for AJ.

Styles takes over and goes for a figure four on the ramp, but Dreamer pops him with one of the lights that he rips off the ramp. Well that’s different. Crossface with….something across AJ’s mouth doesn’t quite work. Running clothesline while Dreamer is up against the ring. I don’t get how this is worthy of being an I Quit match already but whatever. There goes the padding on the floor which is old school heel stuff here.

Styles Clash on the concrete is blocked and AJ is in trouble after a shoulderbreaker. The fans cheer both guys. Can we get them a lesson in fandom? Semi-Pillmanizer to AJ’s arm and then Dreamer wraps the arm around the chair. AJ pulls a fork out of nowhere and goes for Dreamer’s face, resulting in another crossface. We head to the floor for a bit as Dreamer wraps AJ’s arm around the railing. AJ wraps Dreamer’s ankle around the railing because he’s a copycat. This of course doesn’t work either as we head back into the ring.

Figure four goes on but Dreamer rolls over. Figure Four on the post as I wonder what the post actually adds to it. AJ is kind of obsessed with that hold as he uses it for the third time in like 2 minutes. Dreamer finds the fork AJ had earlier but a Pele sends him to the floor. Suicide dive but AJ jumps into a kendo stick shot. Dreamer gets a crossface with the kendo stick around AJ”s eyes, but it breaks before he quits.

AJ gets another fork (has he been chilling with Abdullah lately?) and apparently stabs Dreamer in the eye with it. A thumb in the eye and a fish hook hold on the mouth makes Dreamer quit. The ending looked great as they continue to try to make AJ a heel no matter what they do. Shame he still gets cheered because HE WRESTLES LIKE A FACE.

Rating: C+. Very brutal and violent match, but again was there a point to having the stipulation there other than to have violence? I know they want it to be like ECW but do they want it to be that aspect of it? I wouldn’t think so, but then again I’m not TNA thank goodness. This was ok, but it just got a bit out there near the end.

Angle says he’ll win.

TNA World Title Tournament – Semi-Finals: Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Hardy

Pope vs. Anderson goes on last? Really? Ah wait make sure we get Dixie a quick cameo. The fans are split here, which makes sense in this match at least. Long feeling out process to start which implies a long match. SICK powerbomb from Angle off a reversal but no cover. The fans think this is awesome three minutes in after one big move. They’re improving I suppose.

Angle is dominating for the most part here but Hardy keeps getting out. It’s rare to see a mostly face vs. face match but that doesn’t mean it’s bad. Angle with a reverse bearhug, which more or less equals sitting on the mat with a waistlock on Hardy. Slingshot dropkick misses first but not the second time. The fans of course tell Hardy that he screwed up because Heaven forbid he makes ONE mistake.

Belly to belly from Kurt as he still can throw one of those. Hardy gets a Stunner and Diamond Cutter which is of course called a Twist of Fate. How awesome is that running suplex that Angle does once in awhile? Angle slam sets up the ankle lock but Hardy gets out. Here are the Rolling Germans.

Moonsault and Whisper in the Wind both miss (as in there was no contact on the latter but Angle sold it anyway for two) so we head to the floor. Very solid match so far as they’re doing a slow build pace which is usually a good thing I think. Swanton hits Angle while he is on the floor so everyone is dead. Nice spot, drawing a Jesus Christmas line from Taz. Dixie is concerned and she looks like Morticia Adams.

Back in the ring and they slug it out. Kurt wins, getting a German before an awkward looking Frog Splash for two. The fans think this is awesome and for once they might have a point. It’s pretty good at least. After even more back and forth stuff, Angle takes two Swantons and manages to kick out.

A third gets knees and there’s the Angle Slam for two. We head to the floor again which lasts for about 4 seconds. Sorry for all the play by play but this is a very good match so it’s hard to make jokes. Ankle lock goes on forever (as in like a minute and a half), but Jeff doesn’t tap. There’s the bell, and it’s a time limit draw. There was no countdown or a time limit announced at the start of the match or anything, but what difference should that make?

Crowd COMPLETELY turns on this and boos the heck out of it. Cue Bischoff to add five more minutes. His ankle is dead though so there you go. Ankle lock goes on again but Jeff shakes it off. Naturally he’s mostly fine now and starts the comeback. Solid stuff again here as Jeff takes over.

So much for that as Kurt hits an Angle Slam off the top for two. I would have bet on that as being the ending. Hardy somehow sends him to the floor and Angle BARELY gets back in to avoid a count out. O’Connor Roll gets two and there’s a double clothesline. No pin though after Angle gets two at the very end so FIVE MORE MINUTES!

Ok is there a reason they just didn’t have one big long match? Jeff’s ankle is more or less done but Angle rams into the post. Angle is busted open after hitting the steps on the floor (allegedly). You know because there aren’t any steps in the ring so they had to be on the floor. Wow that was a stretch for a joke.

Hardy more or less puts on a Walls of Jericho and the blood is pouring out of Kurt’s head. Kurt reverses into the ankle lock but Jeff is in the ropes. Apparently being in the ropes for about 5 seconds doesn’t count anymore as Angle pulls him back to the middle of the ring and puts the ankle lock on for about 30 seconds but no tap.

Bischoff wants someone to look at Kurt’s head. This is pretty clearly filler as we need to spend time. Eric declares the match a no contest due to the cut. You have got to be kidding me. Also, do they really think Anderson vs. Pope is going to be able to follow this?

Rating: A-. Match was GREAT, booking is idiotic. This is a way to set up a triple threat or something (because they’re an alternative to WWE right?) like that. This was a great in ring performance though and one of Jeff’s best matches ever. This would be an A+ if not for the constant stoppages and the flat out stupid booking, but that’s TNA for you I guess: you have something great so you overbook it as much as they can.

Pope does a pretty stupid interview about enemas.

TNA World Title Tournament – Semi Finals: Mr. Anderson vs. D’Angelo Dinero

Shouldn’t this be for the title? They start on the mat as I wonder why this is on last. I guess so they didn’t have that idiotic ending end the show? Pope works on Anderson’s shoulder which plays into their feud, so there’s some continuity. I have a little trouble taking a match seriously when the fans all chant Anderson’s catchphrase. Anderson can’t really use the arm at the moment which is some nice selling.

Anderson works on Pope’s shoulder as this is a very slow paced match. Pope blocks a top rope suplex and Anderson goes to the floor. This has been pretty good but the slow pace is hurting it a bit. We hit the near falls aspect of the match and it’s still entertaining. Mic Check is blocked so Anderson hits it 2 seconds later for two. Crowd is pretty much dead mind you. DDE misses and Pope jumps into the Mic Check to end it. Anderson advances to the finals to fight….uh someone. Big F Bomb by Anderson after the match.

Rating: B. Pretty good match here with nothing notably bad and a totally clean ending which is nice. The crowd was just DEAD after the previous match though which is a bad thing and it hurt the match a bit. This was good though and much better than I expected from these two.

Overall Rating: B. Pretty solid show I thought. Nothing is really horrible other than the booking in the Angle/Hardy match. The matches all worked and have been built up to an extent on Impact. The PPVs are usually far better than Impact and this was no exception. With a great match in the first semi-final and some good stuff for the rest of the show, how can you really complain here? Solid show and I liked it FAR more than I expected to.




History of Summerslam Count-Up – 2010 – A One Match Show, Almost Literally

Summerslam 2010
Date: August 15, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Matt Striker, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Well we’re back again for the *insert Summerfest joke here* show. This is the epitome of a one match show as EVERYTHING has been about the Nexus invasion. The theory is that Cena turns tonight but I’m not sold on it. Nexus more or less has to win tonight or the angle is worthless. I’m not sold on this card very well at all, but it’s starting now so let’s get to it.

The opening is of course all about Nexus, which makes sense. The arena and set look great as this really is a huge show.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston

Pretty clear that Dolph retains here. Vickie does her usual whining and catchphrase here just to be annoying. Nice pop for Kofi but nothing great. We’re in MALTA BABY! Kofi misses a dive to start and is in trouble early on. Apparently the tag titles either aren’t major titles or his win is forgotten into the Rocker Tag Title Book of History. King makes a joke about liking 11s or 12s. On a 1-10 scale you freaking perverts.

Dolph is mostly dominant here as he hooks a chinlock. Kofi can’t get the “controlled frenzy” going according to Cole. Does everything have to have a name now? Dolph gets two on a roll thru of a cross body. We get a Fameasser reference from Striker as it makes Kofi famous. Even Lawler chuckles at it. He’s more energetic tonight for some reason. Trouble in Paradise misses, which might be because OF THE MASSIVE CHANTING OF BOOM BOOM BOOM by Kofi.

Sleeper goes on….AND HERE THEY COME? Yes, Nexus hits the ring and beats them up before circling Kofi. The big beatdown follows as I have a bad feeling about where this show is going. Barrett says this is a preview of later tonight. Expect a Kofi run-in later. Nexus is united apparently.

Rating: C+. Not a bad match for what they had, but the ending is very strange. This wasn’t bad, but with no ending like this it really hurt things. I really do expect the Cena turn now for some reason, which is why it likely won’t happen. Anyway, this needed a finish to be good but even still it’s decent.

Jericho wants Miz on the team tonight and so does Edge. Edge eating a Slim Jim is epic for no reason at all. They say he could be a huge star but doesn’t say yes.

Alicia Fox vs. Melina

Well at least this should be short. Melina has a freaking headdress on and she looks like a freaking idiot. Fox is attractive with straight hair. Shame that’s not the case here. Melina is in the skin colored tights which are always weird looking. Melina is the hometown girl so she’s all awesome and such apparently. Yep this is boring. It’s not bad, but seriously does ANYONE care about this match?

Still waiting on something to happen here. Melina might have hurt her knee on a move from the ropes. Alicia of course does nothing about it. Nice superkick by Melina. This is just boring me to death but Melina’s gyrations are helping a bit. That girl could make a KILLING as a stripper. After FAR too long, Melina wins with more or less a weird snapmare. Apparently it’s called the Mind Trip. Ok then.

After the win, cue Laycool to annoy Melina. They say this is awesome and want to take a picture with “two champions” in it so hopefully this will lead to a unification thing soon. Brawl ensues and the worst kick every by Michelle misses by at least 8 inches. Laycool’s music continues to be awesome. Michelle does a knee into the tables to put down Melina for a good while.

Rating: D. This was pretty bad. The ending came out of nowhere but thankfully it ended a bad match. I’m very glad to see that there might be a unification soon, but will anyone care even after that? It’s definitely the right move but with people like Fox chasing it then the whole thing is in trouble. Not a good match.

After a quick recap of the SES vs. Show, we go to this.

Straightedge Society vs. Big Show

How appropriate to have this after that video package. It’s Mercury, Punk and Gallows. Show dominates Mercury and Gallows in about a minute to get us to Punk, who gets face cheers. Oh and Show’s hand is fine. Gallows and Mercury get back up and the 3-1 beatdown begins.

Show comes back of course as it occurs to me that Punk has the most hair of anyone out there. Punk goes for the springboard clothesline and gets caught by the throat. He kicks Show in the head which was cool looking. Cole calls a bulldog a DDT because he’s a stupid man. Punk does a bunch of strikes to the hand and it just ticks Show off. Punk gets knocked to the floor and leaves. Mercury gets chokeslammed and pinned while on top of Gallows. Here lies the SES.

Rating: D+. Pretty weak here as more or less we knew it was just going to be Show winning in the end due to his huge size advantage. This was an ok match and the ending advances the story, but dang man why do they have to crush the SES again? For once could they actually let something go on for more than a month without crippling it?

Kane talks to the casket and Sheamus of all people comes up, saying he’d like to borrow the casket to put Orton in. Kane says no. Sheamus says stay out of his way and Kane yells at him. Odd moment but cool potential.

And here’s Miz. The Raw title match is next so he has a reason to be here. He wants to know if he should be on the team. The fans cheer but he doesn’t care what they think. Allegedly Hart and Cena begged for him to be on the team. He talks about every person on the team and how they’ve all done things to get him on the team. Awesome promo but he wants the fans to admit it. After a HUGE delay, he says yes he’ll be on the team. Cole orgasms loudly.

We recap Orton vs. Sheamus, which isn’t much at all. Orton won a match and now he’s the number one contender. The hype for this has more or less not existed.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Orton is in purple and Sheamus is in green, making this just freaking weird looking. Sheamus powers him back to start which is odd since he’s kind of quietly powerful. Slow start here which should be a good sign but I’m not sure here. They tease a countout and Orton is dominating which is a weird formula for a match.

This is just boring as they’re going WAY too slow. Orton’s arm gets worked on and the elevated DDT is reversed into a backdrop. Sheamus is in control and not much is going on. He hits basic moves and covers. This is apparently the main event and it started about 5 minutes after 9. He gets technical with a drop toehold to put Orton down.

Sheamus likes to use a double axehandle which is kind of a cool move for him to use. More people should use it. When I say more I mean like one total. Sheamus at least works on the arm which is the right idea if nothing else. Orton gets the backbreaker as this is just DRAGGING. The boo/yay cheers start up for punching. Orton does his usual array of clotheslines as I fight off sleep due to this.

Middle rope suplex gets two for the guy with non-mayonnaise colored skin. Sheamus hits his backbreaker for two which of course Cole is surprised by when the kickout happens. Brogue Kick misses though and Sheamus hits the floor. There’s the DDT but the RKO is countered which surprised me. He shoved him off and it legit looks like he hit it from both angles. Clearly countered though which was cool.

High Cross and RKO are both countered but Orton walks into the Brogue Kick for two as the fans are into this now. That’s the issue with WWE Title matches: you don’t have to get into them for a long time and everyone knows it so for the first ten minutes no one cares. Sheamus gets a chair and shoves the referee out for the CHEAP DQ.

Rating: D+. Oh this was bad. The ending crippled the actually solid last 5 minutes or so as the rest of this was just flat out boring. The slow style of both guys crippled each other and the ending had me shaking my head at how freaking dumb it was. I don’t get this at all as if nothing else have Sheamus get the chair shot and win that way but dang man, this was freaking stupid.

Post match Orton snaps and hits the RKO on the table. Good for him. Table didn’t break so at least it looked good. Sheamus is announced as still champion which should make us wait for either HHH or Miz’s theme music. Naturally we get the Legendary trailer.

We recap the way overdone Rey vs. Kane issue, which comes down to one thing: how would Rey know who did it? This took almost five minutes.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Kane

Kane brings the casket with him. Striker even throws out a quick summary of the Taker/Kane childhood which you NEVER hear anymore. Kane goes right for him and gets kicked in the knee. They talk about the keys to victory and King says that Rey’s potential innocence should help him win. Uh, what? Striker thinks this is speed vs. power. You can’t buy commentary like this people!

Kane takes over and we slow it down again. He gets a baseball slide which is cool looking. Can you imagine Kane playing baseball? That’s just funny for some reason. 619 is blocked and Kane takes his head off with a clothesline. We’re clearly just filling in time until the finish. It’s been mostly Kane here and as soon as I say that Kane goes into the post. Rey hits a flying battering ram move but Kane takes over AGAIN with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, a cool move.

Cole likes to talk about people being in the box. Kane wants the referee to ASK HIM. He’s been chilling with Jericho I guess. Top rope rana is blocked and Rey’s knee might be hurt. Wait wasn’t his ankle hurt on Smackdown? Springboard Splash misses so Rey just kicks Kane in the head. Well that works if nothing else. After more uneventful stuff, the 619 is blocked and Rey gets thrown into the casket.

The casket is closed and you know Taker will be in it soon. Chokeslam is blocked and 619 hits. Rey gets two off a counter to a counter to the springboard splash as the end is clearly near. Chokeslam hits to retain THANK GOODNESS!

Rating: C-. Better than the last match as at least this had an ending. It was still boring but Kane winning clean is a nice perk. You know it’ll wind up being Kane vs. Taker but Kane getting a clean win like this is good for him because he flat out needs them for some credibility. Not horrible but I’ve seen worse.

Post match Kane says he’s going to put Rey in the casket and opens it, showing that it’s empty. Two chokeslams and a tombstone (sick one too) and of course Taker is in the casket. He goes for Rey and asks if he’s heard of an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth? Taker asks him why he did it but Rey insists it wasn’t him. Hand around throat and the throat slit sign but he turns to Kane. Kane breaks Taker’s grip and tombstones him, leaving him laying. These guys are on and off more than all the high school relationships in history. Yep Kane is the heel again.

Ad for Smackdown on Sci-Fi.

Clips of Summerslam Axxess which looks awesome.

Recap of Nexus vs. Cena’s Army. If you don’t know this by now, go read the Raw recaps since I’m sick of this story.

Nexus vs. R-Truth/Edge/Chris Jericho/Miz/John Cena/Bret Hart/John Morrison

Remember that this is elimination. This should go for a LONG time. New shirt for Cena. Miz comes out last and Cena has something to say. Cena has a replacement, and it’s DANIEL BRYAN. The really weird thing here is that there was an article up on WWE.com where it spoiled this half an hour before it happened. That’s very freaky and I can’t imagine the speech he got because of it.

Nexus vs. R-Truth/Edge/Chris Jericho/Daniel Bryan/John Cena/Bret Hart/John Morrison

BIG brawl to start as Cole runs down Bryan every second because he has to. The official starters are Bryan and Young. This should be quick. Hey I’m right as Bryan gets a crossface and Young is out in like 30 seconds. That evens things out since Hart is more or less worthless. Gabriel and Jericho are in now and don’t expect every tag to be mentioned since it’s going to be very fast paced.

Tarver comes in and throws a lot of punches. Morrison gets a nice pop as the hometown boy. Flash Kick and Starship Pain put Tarver down to make it 7-5. He landed on his back this time so we’ll call that a success. Barrett wants a huddle. Sheffield comes in and boxes with Morrison kind of as Nexus takes over. The fans want Bret as it’s all Sheffield. Morrison makes a comeback but walks into a kick by Gabriel and the clothesline from Sheffield to make it 6-5.

Sheffield hits Truth in like 30 seconds to tie it up. Jericho comes in and gets beaten down. Why do they keep calling them Team WWE? Nexus is in WWE officially right? Jericho vs. Barrett is an interesting match actually. Bret and Slater come in as Cena hasn’t been in yet, which is rather interesting. Bret does basic stuff and gets the Sharpshooter but there’s a chair in. Sheffield gets the tag and Bret pops him with the chair for reasons of basic stupidity. That’s the best way to get rid of him since he can’t take a power move due to his health so there isn’t another way to do it really.

As a recap it’s Cena/Edge/Jericho/Bryan vs. Sheffield/Barrett/Slater/Otunga/Gabriel. Sheffield gets up and walks into the Codebreaker. Spear ties us up at 4. Gabriel gets a SICK spin kick on Edge. The kick itself was just ok but the impact looked great. Barrett and Edge slow us down a bit. Edge gets a spinwheel kick which is one of his old moves. I haven’t seen him use that in forever.

Otunga comes in and is booed out of the building. Edge hits the Edgecution and gets a face pop for it. Not sure whether it’s for Edge or against Otunga but whatever. Edge gets the tag but STILL no Cena. This is certainly compelling. Lionsault hits and Striker says HE HIT IT! Jericho loses the Walls for a bit but Otunga eventually taps to get us to 4-3 Team Cena. Jericho is wrestling like Lionheart here and a BIG Y2J chant starts. I still want a Jericho face title run.

And he runs into Cena, resulting in Slater hitting his Zig Zag for the tie. Cena and Edge both want in and Edge yells while Bryan plays peacemaker. Slater runs Edge into Cena and rolls him up to get Jericho and Edge in less than a minute. Edge and Jericho beat up Cena before leaving. Jericho: YOU’RE A STUPID MAN! Cena/Bryan vs. Slater/Barrett/Gabriel. Cena is finally in now and gets his head kicked in.

Very good match so far as Nexus has looked STRONG. Cena can’t get anything going and Cole will not shut up about Bryan. Gabriel gets a DDT on Cena that looked good. Everyone beats on Cena and as I say that we get a double clothesline. Bryan comes in and cleans house, using a freaking big boot. Striker wants Cattle Mutilation. Where’s PETA when you need them?

Cena is down on the floor which makes me wonder where this is going. Cena as heel vs. Bryan as face? After a lot of GOOD stuff from Bryan he gets Slater to tap. And cue Miz with the briefcase to blast Bryan and make it 2-1 with Barrett/Gabriel vs. Cena. Cena is more or less dead though despite not being beaten down past anything overly special. He goes into the ending sequence though after a missed Gabriel splash in the corner.

FU doesn’t work as Gabriel makes the tag and Nexus takes over again. It’s a massive beatdown here as Cena has NOTHING. The two guys pull the mats on the floor back and Barrett hits a DDT on the exposed concrete. Gabriel gets tagged in and the 450 MISSES! Cena rolls up Gabriel and instantly gets the STFU on Barrett for the TAP AND THE WIN!

Rating: B+. This was very good. They booked it perfectly, including the ending. As I said in the LD, Cena moved, covered, did a drop toehold, laid on Barrett’s back and pulled. THAT’S IT. That’s how he beat them both. He wasn’t doing an FU to both guys after escaping their finishers and hitting 4 shoulder blocks each. He outmoved them and it worked fine. Nexus looked solid out there and the whole thing looked fine. This was a good match and well done. It certainly wasn’t bad and is nowhere near what people are making it out to be. I loved this and it made the show for the most part.

Overall Rating: B. This was a good show, but it’s a kind that would need a footnote. This is the definition of a one match show. I don’t mean one match is great and the rest suck. I mean this was built around one single match and nothing else on the card mattered at all. Other than the 7 on 7 match, what else was hyped at all?

Luckily, that match was very good and hit on all cylinders. The rest of the card is ok, but it could have been better. The Orton/Sheamus ending was just bad. Kane overpowering Taker is interesting as it actually gives us some intrigue. This was a good show overall, powered mainly by the main event’s success. Not worth seeing much other than the main, but that’s expected with a show like this.

So there you have it: The History of Summerslam. For 23 years the show has served as the second biggest show of the year and I’d say it hasn’t disappointed very often. There have been some bad ones, but there’s also been some great ones. It’s a great pairing to go with Mania as it’s about 4 months later and things have changed a decent amount in between.

Complete with the Survivor Series and the Rumble, you could almost see this as the beginning of the WWE year. Think about it. Of the four major shows, Mania is the end of the year, so this could be the beginning as Backlash is usually the epilogue with the Mania rematches. This is the first big show of the year, so it’s a big benchmark if you look at it that way. I’ll be back with Survivor Series starting around Halloween, so until then…..um….dang I need a catchphrase.

I’ll be back tomorrow with this year’s show hopefully as soon as it ends.  Thanks for reading.




NXT – June 1, 2010 – Back When The Seasons Actually Ended

NXT
Date: June 1, 2010
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

We come at last to the grand finale and the last episode of NXT that I haven’t reviewed yet.  I’m kind of excited for this as the ending of the first one had me very interested indeed.  Anyway, the finalists are Justin Gabriel, Wade Barrett and David Otunga.  Otunga is probably the weakest one but maybe I’m wrong.  Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the entire season which is always cool to see.  The first season of this show was actually pretty good.  This show is live for once.

Striker points out the previously eliminated rookies who are here tonight.  Here are the Pros as we’re filling in a lot of time here.  Now we bring out the finalists.  There will be two eliminations tonight and up first it’s a triple threat match!

Before that though we need to introduce some rookies for next season!  First up is Husky Harris who is a third generation star.  His pro is Cody Rhodes.  He isn’t Dashing yet.  Maybe just jogging lightly at this point.

Monday is Viewer’s Choice Raw.

Another Pro is John Morrison who has Eli Cottonwood who is kind of odd.

Justin Gabriel vs. Wade Barrett vs. David Otunga

 

We’ve got elimination rules here too just to make it awesome.  Finally we get going after 9000 announcements.  Barrett gets sent to the floor early as Otunga beats on Gabriel.  Wade back in now as Gabriel hits the floor.  We’re told that in the second season of NXT there will be a 50/50 split between the Pros and the fans which is important.  Otunga vs. Gabriel at the moment.

Really bad powerslam puts Gabriel down.  Barrett can’t stay in the ring here for too long which is kind of funny.  Gabriel puts Otunga down and gets the 450 but Wade pulls him out to get the pin on Otunga instead.  We take a break as we’re down to one on one.  Back with Gabriel breaking up an armbar on the mat.  Off to an abdominal stretch by Barrett.  He’s working on the ribs so that the 450 is less of a weapon.  Wouldn’t the knee be smarter then?

If nothing else this is a rematch from last week which is kind of good for some reason.  Gabriel gets some nice kicks and a cross body for two.  Wasteland is countered into a sunset flip for two.  Gabriel gets him down and it’s 450 time again.  SICK counter as Gabriel lands on the knees of Barrett.  That looked incredible.  Small package is academic for Barrett.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t bad at all from an in ring perspective, but the idea here was that Barrett looks good.  That’s exactly what was supposed to happen here and it worked perfectly well.  Fun match and it’s cool to see them all in the ring at once in straight competition.  This worked exactly like it was supposed to so I can’t complain.

The Pros are getting ready for the new Poll.

MVP introduces Percy Watson who likes to party.  I didn’t like the idea of Watson at first but he had insane charisma and was definitely someone that caught my attention which was very good.

Zach Ryder introduces Titus O’Neil who really wasn’t all that bad I didn’t think.

The rookies are in the ring so it’s time for the first elimination.  First though we’re going to hear the predictions of the eliminated rookies.  Tarver says himself.  Yeah he was a bit out there.  Bryan says Otunga can’t wrestle and Gabriel can’t talk so Barrett should win.  Sheffield says he doesn’t care.  Young says Barrett should win because he’s strong mentally and physically.  Slater says Barrett due to what he’s proven tonight.

Time for the poll.

1. Wade Barrett.  No shock at all.

2. David Otunga

3. Justin Gabriel

REALLY disagree here as Otunga had nothing but a celebrity wife going for him.  Gabriel had a very flashy finisher going for him which was something that would make me want to stop and see what that was.  He says he’ll be back like almost everyone else has said.  Matt says Justin is like him.  Oh dang he’s screwed.

Laycool have Kaval.  Let the internet explode.

Mark Henry has Lucky Cannon.  Henry is somehow the more talented one.  It sounded like Cole gave Lucky a first name which sounded like Jesson or Jason.

One last rookie showdown as both get 60 seconds to tell the other why they should be gone.  Otunga says Barrett is ugly.  He makes fun of Barrett’s physique so Wade does a mini-pec dance.  Basically Otunga says he’s more charismatic which is pretty much true.

Barrett says he’s ugly because he’s a fighter.  Barrett says Otunga has the IT factor because there’s nothing else that Otunga has going for him.  Wade was definitely more insulting here but made better points I think.  The final Pro’s Poll is next.

Kofi Kingston is a Pro and has Michael McGillicutty who was my favorite from last season.

It’s time for the announcement of the winner, but Miz has something to say.  He’ll be back as a Pro next week with his rookie Alex Riley.  Riley talks about how awesome he is for a bit.

We delay the vote again as the Pros get into an argument.  Regal thinks it’s over before the announcement and congratulates Jericho and Barrett.  He asks anyone to do something about it so Truth does his stupid dance.  Christian says sit down because he hasn’t won a match in a year.  Punk leaves.  Jericho tries to calm Regal down but says that Barrett is winning because of Jericho, not because of Barrett’s own talents.  Regal says he’s always like Jericho’s two moves.  This is hilarious stuff so Striker cuts us off.

Naturally Barrett wins as he certainly should have.  Otunga says he’s the real star and thinks he’s being Punk’d.  Barrett says he told you so which he did.  He warns the Pros that this is the beginning of a new era and talks about the Winds of Change.  Is Wade Barrett an Obama fan?

Overall Rating: B. This was a good way to close out the season.  The match was good and more importantly: the right man won.  Barrett dominated the entire season and other than Bryan has been the best since, which granted no one knew going into the show.  Anyway, this was a good finale and I remember enjoying it as I watched it live.  Good stuff indeed and this set up the following Monday, which was the Nexus.

So that’s the last of NXT.  We’re most of the way done with Season 4 as I’m writing this and the first season is still by far and away the best.  The talent was there, the intrigue was there, the challenges are far more interesting and the drama worked.  Also the poll was a nice touch.  Either way, this was good stuff and it worked better than anything else they’ve done yet.  Check these shows out as for the most part they’re rather entertaining.




Destination X 2010 – Now Featuring Bad Comedy

Destination X 2010
Date: March 21, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

So the focus is back on the X Division here as we have Ultimate X and a tag team ladder match to take a look at this time. I watched this show live and I liked what I saw for the most part. We have AJ vs. Abyss in the main event which if it’s anything like their cage match about 5 years ago it will be great. Anyway, let’s get to it.

The opening video is thankfully about the X Division with Daniels talking about how awesome he is. And now we’re done with that and talking about the rest of the card. Of course it’s over the top since this is a TNA video.

Kazarian vs. Brian Kendrick vs. Amazing Red vs. Christopher Daniels

Winner is #1 contender to the X Division Title. Oh and it’s a ladder match. This was when Daniels had some weird thing on where it wrapped around his neck and then down to his arms. It just looked weird. Make your own Antonio Banderas jokes. We get going and Kendrick hits the floor. Smart. Red launches himself of the ropes to hit everyone not named Kendrick. There’s your first ladder.

Everyone goes for the contract in a row but no one gets it. I love that STO Daniels does. Taz knowing the real name of it might be the only thing worth anything from him. The ladder has an ad for TNAwrestling.com. There’s something amusing about that. TNA gets the idea here at least: have a spot fest. That’s what a match like this is supposed to be and that’s what they’re giving us.

Red hits a SWEET hurricanrana to the floor. In a spot that I thought was stupid Kazarian has Red in position for the Flux Capactior on the ladder. The setup is like a Rock Bottom. His left arm is free. WHY DIDN’T HE GRAB THE PAPER??? He makes up for it a bit with a slingshot Fameasser to a ladder on Daniels. Nice. Kendrick gets his fingers slammed in a ladder. FREAKING OW!

Daniels and Kaz are the only ones left in there. And there’s Kendrick so never mind. Crowd is totally behind Kendrick here in case you’re wondering. That five clap sequence the audience does needs to freaking die. It truly does. In a nice spot, Red goes for a springboard something but jumps into a Diamond Cutter from Kazarian. I like it.

Ladder number two is in and Red and Daniels have a race. Kazarian does the Shelton Spider-Man spot to get onto the ladders and knocks Daniels off to win the stupid thing.

Rating: B+. It was a spot fest and that’s all it had to be. This was a great way to open the show and the match was solid. Even in a TNA crowd you have to get them fired up and what better way than this? Kaz will win the title soon and after this he deserves it. Fun match.

We talk about A.J. vs. Abyss for no apparent reason. I can’t get over this ring thing. It’s just idiotic to say the least. And here’s Ric Flair for no reason at all. Chelsea brings him out in a wheelchair. To the shock of no one, Flair is ticked off. I know some people love this, but it’s saddening to see him look like this much of a joke anymore.

He was so great and now he’s just a blithering old man. The ask your mother jokes are still kind of funny though. Seriously though, he’s just a crazy man that won’t let go of the past now.

We cut to Hogan and Abyss and Hogan likes him a lot. Shocking isn’t it? It continues to confuse me that he’s a former world champion here and all of a sudden he’s’ never accomplished anything. The ring is just stupid. Is it supposed to make him super powered or something? He looks like someone attacked him with ketchup and mustard. Bischoff comes in and he has limited hair now. If nothing else the jokes Abyss and Hogan make are kind of funny.

Knockouts Title: Tara vs. Daffney

Tara is just made of hotness. Apparently Daffney is the “challengemer”. Sure why not Tenay. The zombie hot thing is hit or miss for me with her. She does the splits for her entrance which is unique apparently. I guess if Melina is hurt that makes it unique. Tara goes straight for her and we’re off and running early. Tara’s shirt comes off and I start smiling. At least she didn’t do the dance for the moonsault this time.

It’s ok when she’s dominating but not when she’s ticked off. Tara busts out a Tarantula which at least fits really well. Daffney hooks a messed up submission hold which is unique. This is a bit sloppy but it’s very nice to see women having a match where it looks like they know what they’re doing and you have a legitimate flow to the match rather than just moving from spot to spot, most of which would be blown.

Daffney doesn’t get to wrestle much but she’s not bad when she does. Widow’s Peak ends it. Daffney steals the spider afterwards so the feud continues.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all here. It’s nothing great, but it was perfectly watchable. Daffney surprised me in there and Tara of course is dependable so that works out fine. I wish they didn’t do the spider thing as there’s no real point to continuing this since Tara got a clean pin but whatever.

Brutus Magnus is changing his name to just Magnus. This turns into a discussion of Frankenstein. Sure why not.

Global Title: Magnus vs. Rob Terry

Terry is getting the Goldberg push which is fine I guess. It keeps his matches short if nothing else. It never ceases to amaze me that people talk about what an alternative to WWE TNA is supposed to be and here we have a not incredibly talented musclehead guy getting a mega push. A spinebuster ends this in like a minute and a half.

Rating: N/A. The Goldberg push continues, which I can’t say I have many problems with. This was a total non-threat so that’s all fine and good.

We get a highlight package on Ultimate X with a bunch of people talking about how dangerous it is. We’ll ignore that none of them have ever been in one of these matches.

The Machine Guns talk about how great they are and say Generation Me need their Hardy Boys Starter Kit. That’s rather amusing and the crowd laughed hard at it.

Taz says he was looking at the structure earlier when he was hanging in the rafters. Do I even need to make fun of that?

Ultimate X: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Generation Me

You think this could be awesome? Yeah me too. Penzer messes up a bit on his opening line. Ok one is Max and one is Jeremy. I’ll never remember that but whatever. BIG pop for the Guns. Seriously, how have these two never been tag champions? This is Sabin’s 13th Ultimate X match out of 20 that have happened. That’s INSANE. The Guns immediately hit the corners which is rather stupid but whatever.

Don’t expect a ton of play by play or criticism over psychology here. It’s just not going to happen. In a painful looking spot, One of the Bucks gets their hair pulled around the structure. FREAKING OW MAN! Ok Max has the headband. Got it. I think we got a Team 3D chant in there. Why? What the freaking heck? Who cares as Shelley hits a sweet looking dive to shut the fans up.

There is little more fun to see than precision double teaming. That’s what the golden age of tag wrestling was predicated on and these guys bring that back. Jeremy is freaking entertaining. He hits a springboard modified X-Factor and immediately hits a moonsault to the floor. Sweetness. They do something smart and say no replays until the match is over. That’s a good idea.

Jeremy gets up on the X but Sabin makes the stop. Shelley actually tickles Jeremy to knock him down. Well whatever works I guess. The fans think this is awesome. Now if only they were paying to see it. Everyone goes on one part of the X and they all do the leg hook thing but everyone falls. Kick-o-rama begins and it’s sweet. The speed of these guys is epic.

In a SWEET spot, Max is in the Tree of Woe and Jeremy takes a belly to belly into him. And in a STUPID move, the Guns unhook Max. Seriously, why in the world would you do that? It makes NO sense. One guy is on the floor and the other is stuck in the corner. One guy plays guard and the other goes up. Whatever though as we got a cool double team out of it. Sabin and Jeremy go up but down comes Jeremy and the Guns win it!

Rating: A-. Just a sweet match here. Much like the TLC matches, this wasn’t about wrestling but about high flying spectacles which is just fine. These are designed to have the guys showcase themselves and that’s what they did here. Very fun match and worth finding a copy of for sure.

The highlight package is great of course.

We recap the Band vs. Nash and Young. Seriously, could they make Nash’s heel turn more obvious? I certainly don’t think so. Oddly enough Nash throws a left handed punch in the video. That’s rather odd.

Hall and Nash say they’re ready and use the term Wolfpack a lot. Is this a Hangover commercial? WOW that was weak. Hall is in passable shape here which is shocking. Waltman steals my Crosby and Stills joke so I hate him even more now.

Scott Hall/Sean Waltman vs. Kevin Nash/Eric Young

The heels get no music. Ok then. Waltman is named Syxx-Pac here but that’s just not being written. Hall has a partner yet he’s a lone wolf. Figure that one out. I mean why would he be channeling Barry Windham? There’s a sign all night that says PG Sucks. That line and theory just amuses me. The Survey says the fans want Hall and Waltman to have contracts.

Why does that not surprise me? Young is just billed from Canada. Is that the best they can do? Pac and Young start us out so Pac will be bearable here. He’s always been better against small guys. I just have no reason to believe he’s this giant killer that everyone swears he is. Hall comes in and does all his old stuff. Seriously I’m sitting here calling every move he’s going to do down to the second.

Young and Pac botch the heck out of a backdrop. Waltman hits a decent over the top rope dive. No Nash at all yet as they have the whole thing so telegraphed it’s pathetic. Seriously, this is boring simply because we know what’s coming. Waltman sprays paint in Young’s eyes. Yeah I’m sure the referee sees nothing odd about that at all since he was with Nash the whole time. Nash gets the tag and there it is.

Even Taz sounds bored with it. All three finishers hit and it’s over. They do the paint outline of Young on the mat which makes the whole thing look stupid. We even get the Wolfpack theme song minus the lyrics. We’ll ignore the Young push being crushed for three old guys that were a unit 12 years ago.

Rating: D. Seriously, this was so boring. There was no point to the match as it was all about the turn that we all knew was coming. When a TNA crowd sounds bored out of their mind, you know you screwed up something bad. Also, it was so much of a swerve that they had the Wolfpack music not only ready but remixed without the lyrics. That’s a REAL swerve.

Angle burns a picture of Anderson. Ok then.

X-Division Title: Shannon Moore vs. Doug Williams

So on a show where the X-Division is being highlighted, the X Title match is going on about halfway through the show? Sure why not. Why is Moore getting PPV time when Hardy and Van Dam and Pope and Sting aren’t again? Has Moore ever won anything? Also, why do we need both him and Jesse Neal? I seriously couldn’t tell them apart if I had to. Moore apparently reads from the book of DILLIGAF.

Wow that’s idiotic but at least it’s something minor. We get a Cravate so I’m happy. It’s a weird kind of side headlock that Chris Hero uses a lot in case you’re wondering. It looks like you’re setting for a snapmare but you never flip the guy over. Williams is a good striker if nothing else. The crowd finally wakes up a bit. Williams reaches under the ring and gets a brick which gets the win. There needs to be an official Under the Ring Checker.

Seriously, people just throw EVERYTHING under there. Moore is allegedly bleeding but it doesn’t look like much blood to me. Post match we get a semi-shoot promo from Williams where he whines about how the division isn’t about wrestling anymore but high fliers so he’s going to change that. He goes and steals a woman’s purse to put lipstick on Moore. Ok then. The fans chant for RVD and no one comes of course. I would argue Hogan and his booking are what’s wrong with the division but that’s just me.

Rating: D. Weak stuff here as not only did no one care but the match wasn’t that good. Seriously, what in the world is the appeal of Shannon Moore? I seriously don’t get it. He never wins anything, his look is stupid and he’s nothing special in the ring. Total filler match.

We recap Morgan and Hernandez vs. Beer Money. This was just after Beer Money turned heel on television while complaining about not being on television. I flat out do not like this angle at all as it’s making the tag titles look stupid kind of. If you insist on turning Morgn heel, at least wait awhile first.

Tag Titles: Matt Morgan/Hernandez vs. Beer Money

Sweet goodness have the champions fallen far. I like the opening of Beer Money’s theme song if nothing else. Dang that outline looks stupid. Morgan and Roode start us out. And so much for that as Hernandez is tagged in maybe 10 seconds into the match. How did they miss the boat with Hernandez?

So basically the champions can’t be hurt and the challengers have zero chance here. Ah ok that’s better as Hernandez gets beaten down. Hernandez holds Storm up in a suplex for about 25 seconds. That’s very scary. So basically Morgan is cocky and comes in when Hernandez has beaten the other guys down.

Morgan blocks a big dive from Hernandez and then the Supermex gets hit with an enziguri, Once he remembers to sell it, Roode goes way up in my eyes with a Blockbuster. I love that move. After more arguing, the size and power are too much and a modified Dominator ends this. Morgan kicks Hernandez afterwards.

Rating: D+. This was all angle and not much about the match at all. That’s ok I guess as it set up a bigger one the next night. This was ok but nothing great at all. Beer Money isn’t as good as people say they are but they’re ok. I still don’t like the champions being together but that’s neither here nor there I guess. Decent but I wanted it to end.

We recap Angle vs. Anderson and their game of pass the medal. The promos have been good but it’s been repetitive with the medal being the focus of the thing over and over again.

Mr. Anderson vs. Kurt Angle

We have 53 minutes left so this is going to be LONG. We start off slow which is odd as they’ve fought before but that’s fine. The crowd is clearly not as hot as they were during the ladder or Ultimate X match. That’s not particularly a good thing but to be fair it means they put on a good match earlier. Much like he did with Shane at KOTR 2001, Angle does the volunteering to let Anderson get a free hold on him.

Naturally, Angle wins here. Angle is outwrestling him here which is what you would expect of him obviously. Dang the bald one can throw a punch when he wants to. Anderson works on the arm but that doesn’t work very well. Ok maybe it does. It’s so hard to tell at times. This has slowed down a lot and it’s not helping much at all. If nothing else Angle can still do a decent belly to belly. Naturally the Angle Slam gets two.

When was the last time that actually worked? Mic Check and tights get two. Angle busts out a freaking frog splash and it wasn’t bad at all. There goes the referee as Anderson hits a belly to back suplex. Oh ok he spun about two inches so it’s an Angle Slam. Got it. Angle gets his medal back. Yeah I don’t care at this point either. He then does the same thing that he criticized Anderson for over the last few months.

Oh him being a face makes it ok though right? That’s the Hulk Hogan principle I believe. Ankle Lock ends it a few seconds later. Anderson was more or less worthless here. He was ok looking but this was very one sided. Anderson blasts the crowd afterwards. He says his name about ten times so this has to be a good promo right?

Rating: C-. Not bad, but really Anderson never had any real chance to win. Like I said, he looked ok but there was zero drama here. That’s never a good thing, especially in a long match like this. Either way, not bad or anything, just not that exciting.

We recap the Abyss/AJ match, which is perhaps the weakest main event I could think of. I mean really, did ANYONE buy Abyss possibly winning the title here? I never once did as they’re going to likely give it to Pope at Lockdown. Basically Hogan gave up his HOF ring and it’s made Abyss powerful or something. Oh and he chokeslammed Flair through the ramp.

AJ says he’s not afraid and Abyss is stupid.

Abyss says he has a ring and thanks Hogan. Remember: Abyss was nothing without Hogan. This goes on way too long and ends with Hogan catchphrases.

TNA World Title: A.J. Styles vs. Abyss

Seriously, the Hogan worship needs to END. This is idiotic to say the least. Oh look: let’s take someone not like Hogan at all and turn him into someone that does Hogan things. It’s just stupid. He’s a monster. Let him be a monster! Flair and Chelsea are here too. Even big match intros aren’t helping this much. Yeah the red and yellow spots on his shirt are just idiotic looking.

Abyss does something SMART and jumps AJ during the intros. That’s a good and simple idea that works. We’re on the ramp now and Flair goes after Abyss. Seriously, what is he going to do? Remember, he’s in a wheelchair. See this is what makes AJ’s heel turn stupid: he can work great matches ON HIS OWN. AJ is a great wrestler and was world champion. WHY WOULD HE NEED A MENTOR???

That’s never been explained I don’t think. He’s the best in the world. What can Flair help him do? Become the best on Venus too? I mean if you factor Flair completely out of this, it’s a solid match based on AJ’s abilities alone. I just do not see what Flair adds to this at all. The other issue: Styles’ offense is based on face style moves. Seriously, he fights like a face does with the high flying stuff and all the kicks.

That’s what makes little sense to me. AJ works on the leg which makes perfect sense at least. The springboard forearm is caught. I love how AJ is outside in position for a springboard and Taz says he thinks he’s going for a springboard. Wow indeed. Pele brings AJ back into control. Question: WHERE IN THE WORLD IS JOE??? Seriously, we haven’t heard about him in like 2 months now and everyone is just not talking about him?

That makes no sense but whatever. It’s TNA so there we are. AJ hits Spiral Tap. CAN’T YOU SEE HOW EVIL HE IS??? The fans chant for the move and I shake my head at how they messed this up. Black Hole Slam gets two with almost no heat. And Flair maces the referee. A belt shot puts AJ down but it’s HOGAN FOR THE SAVE BABY!!! He brings Hebner with him so there’s your new referee I guess.

AJ continues to fail as a heel as he hits a springboard 450 splash but Abyss GIMMICK INFRINGEMENTS UP! Abyss chokeslams him through the ring and Hebner throws the match out. So let me get this straight. Abyss just crushed AJ after Hardy beat AJ on Impact and Pope gets AJ at the next PPV. Why is AJ being bought as champion again? Flair gets mace from Hogan.

Yeah the old men wandered out here looking for the Country Kitchen Buffet and wind up in the ring. And we get the idiotic ending to the show as they mace and punch Wolfe who also ran down and he stumbles over Flair who is on all fours to fall into the hole in the ring. WOW. Hogan leads Abyss around the ring like a canine and that’s it.

Rating: C-. The match itself was good, but the ending is straight up stupid. Seriously, they did a comedy sketch to end the PPV. Also, if AJ is more or less dead, why isn’t Abyss champion? Why does that make it a no contest? The whole thing just made limited sense to me. Also, AJ wrestles like a face, period. There is no reason for him to act like a heel at all. The ending here is the main issue though.

That and the lack of drama to it. Not once in the buildup or in the match did I expect Abyss to win, period. I think Pope gets the title at Lockdown. So what if his hype is mostly gone now due to the long delay? Since when does a champion need people to care about him right? Anyway enough of a tangent. This was an ok match with a flat out stupid ending. Don’t do this again TNA.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a show in two parts. The first half or hour and a half or so is great stuff. The second half, as in everything after Ultimate X, is just weak. There is not a single match on there that got me going or was really that good. The crowd is noticeably weaker too and for a TNA crowd, that’s saying a lot. After this show, I realized the issue: nothing of note happened here.

No titles changed hands, a lot of the feuds are unresolved, we knew MCMG and Kazarian would be winning their matches and AJ looks weak. Tell me, what was settled here? If we’re supposed to wait for Lockdown to do that, why have this show at all? It’s not a bad show by any means. It’s just uneventful. There are two GREAT matches on it which is why this is a good show.

There are passable matches here, no doubt. But like I said, nothing definitive happened here. Anderson and Daffney are going to keep feuding with the respective faces, Abyss deserves another shot, and the tag champions still don’t get along. What came from this show? Oh wait: Nash joined the Band in the most predictable segment this year.

That’s the big thing from this show right? Again, what came out of this show at all, because I’m missing it. Check out the X Division gimmick matches, but other than that, you’ll miss nothing off this show at all.




Hardcore Justice – This Actually Wasn’t A Total Failure

Hardcore Justice
Date: August 8, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay

This is the second return to PPV for ECW as they try to squeeze the final drop of blood out of the stone that was ECW. I really am not looking forward to this as it was built around two matches and one of those was canceled. It’s RVD vs. Sabu tonight which needs to stay under 8 minutes or so. Other than that we know a lot of names and that’s about it. Let’s get to it.

Tazz is here and says this is going to be EXTREME and that this is going to be awesome no matter what people say. Yeah I’m sure.

FBI vs. Kid Kash/Simon Diamond/Swinger

It’s Tony, Tracy and Guido. Yeah because Kash was SO important to ECW. Sal is somehow even fatter if that’s possible. Smothers looks AWFUL. It’s Tony Luke now instead of Mamaluke. Guido looks about the same. The lights are all dark and there’s this weird blue tint to it. Guido and Kash start us off. They point out that they can’t say certain names or letters. WOW.

Simon is HUGE and even Tazz suggests different attire. He stops halfway through the match and cuts a promo to which he gets a LOUD Shut the F Up chant. He challenges them to a dance off. It’s somehow worse than it sounds. The non-FBI team breaks it up but Sal crushes them. Kash does a big dive to do something. Keep in mind we’re 20 minutes into this.

We get to a normal match now and it’s not bad. Seriously, we would have had to pay 45 dollars for this. Mamaluke is getting destroyed here and Diamond does something close to Three Amigos. Guido hits the Kiss of Death (Killswitch) to end it.

Rating: D. Once this got going it wasn’t bad but ten minutes of crap to get to the good stuff isn’t how this is supposed to go. This didn’t work at all for me though as three of these guys meant next to nothing at all in the original ECW. This was watchable I guess but the lighting and the other stuff just isn’t doing it so far.

The announcers talk about Sabu being in the main event.

We have a Where Are They Now series tonight. That’s not a good sign.

Tod Gordon says goodbye. He’s fat.

Pitbull #1 says hi.

Blue Meanie is on a TNA PPV. Literally that’s all they’re saying.

They do their intros and then they come back. Pitbull says show them hardcore. Meanie says thank you. None of them are here or anything.

AJ liked ECW.

Love liked ECW but only saw the end.

Snow yells at Head for possibly causing legal issues with the show. Richards comes in and this is his night apparently. Nova (Simon Dean) shows up in his BWO apparel. He talks about getting the band back together and this is painful to watch. A fake Blue Meanie comes in and we’re told that it doesn’t matter if it’s not really him. Good night.

Hey look it’s a match.

CW Anderson vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

You know, because these two have SUCH a history together. They keep calling it the original era because they can’t say ECW, even though they do anyway. Oh this is wrestling. Just to be clear I guess. Amazingly enough, there’s next to nothing to talk about here. Scorpio was great in his time, but he was old in 99 and he’s very old now. This is kind of back and forth and really isn’t bad for the most part. Spinebuster gets two and the Tumbleweed ends it.

Rating: C-. This was actually ok. They had a nice back and forth thing going here with a solid clash of styles going. I liked Anderson to an extent and I always liked Scorpio so this worked well for me. Somehow I have a feeling this is going to be the best match of the night. This wasn’t bad at all though and has me in a better mood.

Madison liked ECW too.

Matt Morgan got to go to a bar where ECW guys came to. They have to call it the Philadelphia promotion. This is sad.

Anderson says ECW was doing other stuff.

RVD and Fonzie say they wish they had a chance to fight Lynn again. RVD wants a replacement and picks Sabu. Fonzie says he’ll call it right down the middle.

PJ Polaco vs. Stevie Richards

Richards has the BWO with them despite not being Big Stevie Cool here. The fans chant Polaco’s name (Justin Credible which I’ll be referring to him as) and then Stevie Richards. The fans want blood and an hour (almost) into it we haven’t had any. Justin hits a jumping spinning DDT which was one of his signature moves back in the day at least.

The fake Meanie is one of the Phi Delta Slam guys if anyone remembers them. He’s a security guard at times too. The matches here aren’t completely awful but this comes off as so low rent that it just can’t be taken seriously. And remember, this is TNA’s PPV offering this month. It’s not like the real PPV is next week or anything. This is it for August.

And That’s Incredible ends….nothing as Nova jumps up. Stevie Kick ends this in something that would NEVER have happened in the original company. The lights go out and Sandman is here to no music at all. White Russian Leg Sweep and Justin is back up before like a second. Cane shots put him down again.

Rating: D+. Not too bad here but the booking was just bad. I know Justin is crap but he was world champion for five months in the old days while Stevie was billed as a clueless putz. This didn’t work that well but it could have been FAR worse. Keep in mind that these grades are on an adjusted scale here as most of these would be fails or worse.

Francine and her daughter are at home. She looks bad. Like really bad. She was hot back in the day and now this.

They pay tribute to the people that have died with a graphic and nothing more. No names, no faces, no anything.

Brother Runt vs. Al Snow vs. Rhyno

Runt is Spike Dudley of course and is nearly bald. This is elimination rules and better not break 8 minutes. Spike hits a dive that is ok after some basic stuff. He plays the role of the pinball of course and I still wonder what Snow has to do with this. Snow hits the trapping headbutts on Rhyno. TNA guys are watching in the back. Why they’re here is beyond me because they’re not wrestling.

Acid Drop to Rhyno is blocked and this needs to end fast. We’re on the floor again and you actually can’t see due to the lighting. The referee goes down and Head drills Rhyno. Spike does the Eddie chair thing by slamming the mat with it and throwing it to Rhyno. He and Snow do the same thing so they’re all down. Oh my head hurts. Acid Drop ends Snow and then the Gore ends the whole thing.

Rating: D. I like Snow but this was just bad. There’s a reason these guys retired: THEY AREN’T THAT GOOD ANYMORE. Rhyno is ok at best and he’s the biggest star by far in this. At least he won I suppose, but this was just random with no point at all. Well at least it’s over and wasn’t that long.

Foley is reading Hogan’s book and likes being the ref.

More guys talk about the company, including Sabin and Magnus.

Cajones/Axl Rotter vs. ???/???

Cajones is of course Balls Mahoney. He issues an open challenge and it’s JOEL GERTNER. Ok this is at least an improvement. I think I smell Team 3D. Yep I’m right and they’re in tye-dye. Thankfully Joel does a poem which is funny. He looks…bad. Like even worse than before. It’s a South Philadelphia Street Fight in Orlando according to Ray.

They go split screen here for the sake of torturing us even better. Ray shouts at him and calls him Balls because that’s ok I guess. We go into the crowd for fun. This is “hardcore” I guess with mainly just punching and random shots with weak weapons. We bring in some more traditional weapons back in the ring. The announcers are of course cracking up over everything here instead of selling it like a hardcore match.

Frying pan to the head of Balls. And Mahoney breaks out a toy lightsaber. And so does Bubba. I hate this show. I truly do. Axl botches a reverse DDT on Bubba and Nutcracker Suite to D-Von gets two. The fans want flaming tables. They get a chair duel instead. The referee tries a double clothesline on the team that isn’t the Dudleys. It fails, much like this match.

The Dudleys bring in a table and Gertner has lighter fluid. Balls goes through it, ending this mess.

Rating: D-. Flaming table is all that keeps this from failing. This whole show is a freaking joke and that’s being kind.

Team 3D says they’re the best in the world and cue The Gangstas. They beat the tar out of each other and then hug.

Raven talks about his past with Dreamer where they were kids together and Dreamer was a jock. Raven slept with a girl Tommy liked and then the girl left Raven for Dreamer. That was Beaulah in case you don’t know that somehow.

Jesse Neal liked the little that he saw of ECW.

Kaz wanted to be in ECW.

Joey Styles should be here but isn’t. Everyone talks about him. This is so stupid. They make it sound like he’s dead.

Raven vs. Tommy Dreamer

For no apparent reason, Foley is the referee. Beaulah is here and is still hot. The fans chant Uncle Scotty to complete this joke. They do the drop toehold spot and Dreamer gets beaten up in front of his kids. Dreamer might be the first guy to bleed tonight. It’s your usual stuff here with the beatdown that isn’t that great but the history makes it watchable. Raven is busted.

The signs are brought in as is the ladder. They do some decent stuff with that for two for Raven. Dreamer Driver gets no cover. We finally get to the barbed wire which is wrapped around Raven’s face. He taps but the BWO runs in to make sure it doesn’t count. This needs a Sandman run-in. Down goes Foley for no apparent reason. Raven Effect gets two. Or is it the Even Flow? Whatever.

Foley and Socko, which they can’t say, takes down Raven and that guy from earlier that we couldn’t recognize in the Blue Meanie skit runs down with a top rope leg drop for Dreamer. Allegedly his name is Lupus? Mandible Claw with wire to Raven of course doesn’t put him down and he cuffs Dreamer.

Beaulah comes in to stop the Rock/Foley ending in the Last Man Standing match which doesn’t work. Dreamer manages to DDT Raven while cuffed behind his back for two. Raven hits Dreamer in the knee with the chair and a DDT on it ends this. Yes, Dreamer jobbed to Raven in the final encounter. I am about to give up.

Rating: D. This started out as an ok brawl but just got insane. To be fair it was a pretty brutal match but the ending is just stupid. The problem is that this feud was perfectly finished in ECW and there was no need for this. Dreamer winning was the right way to go here so of course they didn’t do that. Not a horrible match, but it’s just showing how bad this idea was overall as this feud is one that didn’t need to continue.

The Gangstas hit on So Cal Val and make racial jokes. Borash is New Jack’s now.

We talk about Heyman and say stuff we’ve all heard before.

Sabu vs. Rob Van Dam

It’s 10:15 so hopefully we’re out before half past the hour. Other than that this is going to go WAY too long. Fonzie is in a yellow jacket and RVD comes out first. The fans say this is classic. Sabu is bald. They start out with a feeling out process because they know each other so well. Sabu does his point to the sky and RVD does his pointing. It would be nice if they actually did something.

In an interesting thing Fonzie sends a chair in but does it right down the middle. We hit the crowd for a bit as the chanting is just idiotic. Sabu botches….something and then the camel clutch is on. The bald guy doesn’t look half bad all things considered. With both guys down, Fonzie throws both of them a bottle of water. Both get tables as a result. Oh this isn’t going to end well.

Van Dam hits some slingshot legdrops and Fonzie tries to revive Sabu. Sabu hits a rana to send RVD into a chair in the middle of the ring. It looked totally fake but not bad at the same time. Clutch is on again for like 2 seconds. Triple Jump Moonsault is blocked by Van Dam and Sabu is bleeding from somewhere. Van Assassin hits (the one footed dropkick into the chair while the guy is crotched) and Sabu to the floor.

Ok so that lasts like a second and we’re back now. Morrison, watch an RVD match to see how you do the split legged moonsault, I beg of you. Rolling Thunder to the chair hits for two. Five Star ends it.

Rating: D+. While a mess, this is what it was supposed to be: a war. They beat each other up and it really isn’t as bad as anyone is saying it is. It’s bad, but this is what the match was supposed to be. There was no way it was going to be a classic, but this really wasn’t horrible. It held my attention for the most part and had some decent spots. For the ending to this show, this was bearable.

The locker room empties and we have a beer bash, which isn’t like that other show at all. The crowd chants F YOU VINCE and Dixie gets in the ring. Bubba takes her on a victory lap to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Let’s get the obvious out of the way first: this was bad. The wrestling was awful and there were really only two matches worth much at all. Luckily those were the two main matches and not the stuff no one remembers. This show is being called one of the worst of all time and from the view that this is the TNA offering this month, they’re right. From the perspective of using your intelligence, that’s not the case. Something that needs to be remembered here is the audience. This wasn’t for the casual wrestling fan. This was for the ECW fan and those people likely loved this. While the wrestling was bad, the booking was smart for the TNA fans as they get their PPV for FREE on Thursday. This was a way to get money out of the people that likely wouldn’t pay for a TNA show 90% of the time while still appeasing those that do. It’s a brilliant strategy from that perspective, but for casual TNA fans this was dreadful.

Another thing to keep in mind is that this was supposed to be like an ECW show. As great and fun as it was, in retrospect One Night Stand was more like a WWE show than an ECW show. This show had the realism of ECW far more than ONS did. This had the bad comedy and the random interference and the bad wrestling and the random matches. This was FAR more like ECW than the show five years ago was. Now that being said I’d still watch ONS over this a million times, but like I said earlier I’m not the target audience in the slightest. This wasn’t a good show, but it will likely be a successful one. It worked from that perspective and will be seen by ECW fans as a success, which is the whole idea. Don’t watch it or anything, but it’s not as bad as it’s made out to be, period.




ROH – Death Before Dishonor VIII

Death Before Dishonor VIII
Date: June 19, 2010
Location: Ted Reeve Arena, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Dave Prazak, Joe DeGrowski

This is a few months old but at the time I remember more or less hearing that it was the most awesome show EVER. Granted this is normal for ROH fans as they swear up and down that only they know what REAL wrestling is which normally makes me laugh. This one however continues to get praise so I figured I should check it out. The main event is Tyler Black vs. Davey Richards, who is claimed by most ROH fans to be the best in the world. I’ve seen some of his stuff and find him vastly overrated, but maybe I’m wrong. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Kings of Wrestling (Chris Hero and Claudio Castagnoli, the current ROH Tag Champions) yelling about the Briscoes and how they’ll pay for their actions. Standard stuff but they come off as faces here.

Cabana and Corino do the talking for Generico and Steen respectively.

Richards, who is TOWERED over by Black, says he wants the world title. Black says he’s keeping the belt.

This was a PPV broadcast on the internet which isn’t a bad idea.

We’re supposed to open with Cheech and Cloudy but here’s El Generico, who wants Steen NOW. Steve Corino comes out as Steen’s mouthpiece and says Steen will never wrestle in the opening match as he’s all about the main event. Generico still says NOW. Steen sprints past Corino and IT’S ON!

El Gernerico vs. Kevin Steen

Steen is a rather fat Canadian and is supposed to be the heel but we’re in Toronto so it’s kind of split. Big old dive over the top by Generico and he controls on the floor. Standard feud here: former tag partners and tag champions but an outsider gets in one of their ears and turns him heel, setting up the big grudge match. The dueling chants start up as they slug it out on the ropes.

All Generico here in the early going and as he hits a leg lariat the audio feed starts to break up a bit. Spinning rope walk DDT is countered very nicely into a back breaker by Steen and followed up by a senton in a nice combination. They slug it out a bit and of course Steen throws a superkick. What is with so many people in this company using a superkick? Loud F YOU STEEN chant which says a lot as a Canadian (ok so they’re both Canadian which that explains a lot) is getting heel heat in Canada.

Generico makes a quick comeback and hits a Generico Driver for two. It’s more of a midlevel move for him I think so it’s not as annoying to have him kick out of it so early in the match. Package piledriver (odds are if you’re reading an ROH review you know what these moves are. If not there’s a handy device called Youtube) attempt on the apron is blocked and Generico hits a tornado DDT to the floor.

The masked dude goes up top for a big old splash that gets two. Steen manages to go for the Sharpshooter but it’s blocked. Is there a quota of Sharpshooters every Canadian wrestler has to use in a year or something? Since this is an ROH match we trade STIFF looking strikes before both guys go down. I get the whole adrenaline argument, but how can a second superkick not put Generico down while the first one did when he’s taken more punishment in between? I’ve never gotten that.

Moonsault misses and the masked Canadian hooks the Sharpshooter to fill his quota. Generico goes for…something, but in a nice counter Steen hooks him into a Package Piledriver for two. That would have been awesome if I had known what it was supposed to be in the first place. Generico proceeds to kick the heck out of Steen and we go up where Steen finds a wrench to blast him in the head with. A brainbuster type move from the top ends it for Steen.

Rating: B-. Pretty solid match here but I kind of question the whole having a big grudge match this early on the card. Granted they addressed that at the beginning of the match so I can’t complain much there. This feud continued on so the ending makes sense here. This was an intense match so points for that. Nothing incredible but a solid choice for an opener I would think.

Some wrestlers are asked who is going to win the title match. Cornette won’t answer and Steen only talks about Generico. The money seems to be on Richards. Austin Aries predicts there will be a winner and that winner will be world champion. Whoever it is though will never be as good as he is. That’s a heel promo right there.

Up in Smoke vs. All Night Express

Up in Smoke is Cheech and Cloudy who I’ve heard a lot about but never seen. The All Night Express is Rhett Titus and Kenny King, who come of you might vaguely remember as Kenny from Tough Enough 2. Rhett Titus is like Rick Rude on crack but in a good way. They’re a comedy team but they’re rather good from the little I’ve seen out of them. King jumps Cloudy to start as they follow the Code of Honor by shaking hands.

Kind of a botch on a double armdrag as the heels are sent to the floor. Cheech backdrops Cloudy onto the heels to take them out. Back in the ring and they speed things up again but a nice double team move nearly kills Cloudy. Up In Smoke are both really small guys but wrestle kind of like the Guns do. The Briscoes might not be here for their match later. Austin Aries, the Express’ manager, pulls a Jericho and runs to the announcers shouting ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ME?

King can move out there. He was kind of memorable on Tough Enough but wasn’t really anything great. From what I’ve seen of him in ROH he’s gotten a good deal better. Rollup gets two on King. Up in Smoke pulls out something called Partly Cloudy with a Chance of Cheech. It doesn’t hit but that’s an awesome name. Kind of an eye roller but still great. A lot of double teaming here but it keeps getting broken up.

And now we get to the problem I have with a lot of wrestling companies today, including indys for the most part. The Express hits a SWEET powerbomb/springboard Blockbuster combo into a pin and Cheech kicks out of it. If you’re going to break out these huge moves then have them end the match. If they don’t get pins then yeah they’re big and flashy but they don’t actually end anything, which makes them look weak.

We get the awesomely named move from earlier which is a 619 from one and a dropkick to the back of the head from the other. And since we can’t have a double team move like that end it, King hits a spinning backbreaker onto his back (think Chris Harris’ Catatonic) but keeps Cloudy on his back, allowing Titus to go up and hit a knee drop onto Cloudy for the pin. Yeah the other move looked much better.

Rating: D+. Pretty much just a basic tag match here to get the Express on the show. It’s not bad but the breaking up of pins and constant double teaming from both teams took me out of the match too often. At times you need to just have one guy vs. one guy as it allows the double team moves to look more important and impactful. This wasn’t bad but it needed to be changed a lot to make it a truly good match.

Post match the Express talks about how awesome they are and how awesome Aries is, bringing him to the ring. Aries really is solid on the mic with basic heel stuff. Here’s Delirious for their match.

Delirious vs. Austin Aries

Delirious is in his insane red tonight. Aries tried to injure Delirious and hurt his throat, setting this up. Again, simple booking can work best at times. The Express gets thrown out for the sake of a match. Mist is shot out almost immediately and Aries is in trouble. Who came up with that thing in the first place? It’s such a staple anymore that if you had trademarked it you would make a fortune.

Chokebomb by Delirious which is a rather cool move actually. Aries is still blind about 3 minutes in. Aries goes for a brainbuster on the referee, I guess just not noticing the shirt there. He gets some water in his eyes and now we’re ready to go. Out on the floor and Aries sets Delirious up for the Savage/Steamboat axe handle spot that set up their Mania 3 match and was also used to put Delirious out. This one of course misses though as we need to brawl more.

Hot shot gets two for Aries as he takes over. Cobra Clutch suplex gets two for Delirious as he hits it out of nowhere. He starts his comeback and lands like 5 sentons to the back of Aries. Cobra Clutch is countered and Delirious goes to the floor. Aries goes for a suicide dive and faceplants into the wall in a SICK looking bump. And here’s the Express for the CHEAP DQ! This feud is still going on today so you get the idea here.

Rating: C+. This was ok but the ending crippled it. Delirious is certainly different than most guys but in the ring I’ve never quite gotten the appeal of Aries. He’s good but I’ve never found him to be great at all. This was a decent match but the ending hurt it badly. The idea was supposed to be for Delirious to get his revenge and to this day he still hasn’t. I get stretching an angle out but this is a bit much.

Fans are split on the world title match.

Gauntlet Match

This is a 6 man gauntlet where the winner gets a future title shot. The idea is two people start us off and have a match. Winner gets man #3 and so on until the last man is standing. We start with Tyson Dux vs. the TV Champion Eddie Edwards. Edwards is the partner of Davey Richards in the American Wolves. Feeling out process to start us off with some nice wrestling stuff.

They chop it out and Dux takes over. It’s pronounced Dukes if you’re curious for some odd reason. Not a lot going on here as they both want to conserve energy for later. Edwards as the TV Champion is used to having ten minute matches which is a nice little explanation for why he’s not used to going long times in the ring.

Edwards rolls through something into his half crab submission but Dux makes the ropes. Reverse chinlock goes on as Dux’s back is hurt. Dux runs into a pair of big boots as we get to the striking which just has to happen here. Release gordbuster and a snap DDT get 2 for Dux. Briscoes still aren’t here but a clothesline takes the head off of Dux. Edwards gets a Codebreaker from the middle rope into the half crab (called an Achilles Lock here because ROH has to be smarter than we are) but after getting to the ropes Dux gets a rollup out of nowhere for the SHOCKING upset.

Daivari of the Embassy is next and the overly muscular one goes after the leg. After a lot of leg work we get a decent figure four as Dux is in trouble. He slaps the mat but of course that’s not a tap because he’s trying to get the crowd into things right? And now his leg is ok once he gets out of the hold? Death Valley Driver, Dux’s finisher, hits but hey since we’re in ROH you have to have someone kick out of a finisher right (Yes I know everyone does it anymore)?

Nice neckbreaker by Dux but Prince Nana gets the foot of Daivari on the rope. And now it’s the Rude vs. Warrior at Mania 5 ending as Nana hooks the foot on a suplex and holds it down for the pin.

Colt Cabana vs. Daivari now which is a rematch from last night. A reverse Boston Crab literally ends this in less than a minute with Cabana getting the win.

Steve Corino comes in 5th and we get a reference to Bitter Friends Stiffer Enemies II which is a show I’ve actually reviewed. We get a Phil Brooks reference as a former associate of Cabana. He’s out of ROH now and got knocked out last night by Big Show in an idiotic match. Billy Goat’s Curse (the reverse Boston Crab) is hooked but we head to the floor.

Corino gets a fork from somewhere but it gets taken away. This allows a low blow to turn the tide and Steve takes over. He gets something and jabs it into Cabana’s eye and hits the Old School Expulsion. He goes for a running elbow and gets caught in a SLICK crucifix for the pin!

Roderick Strong, freshly heel, hits the ring and kicks the tar out of Cabana for two. I like Strong so this should go well. He has Truth Martini as his manager now who is rather annoying but you have to expect that in some managers. Strong kicks the heck out of him but Cabana hits a standing Lionsault for two. The camera is shaking here which is kind of annoying but acceptable given the level of this company. Strong’s knee is hurt so Martini runs in and drills Cabana in the head with his book for the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty solid stuff here and they managed to get the quick eliminations out of the way but at the end of the day a gauntlet match doesn’t usually work that well. This was one of the better ones I’ve seen but everyone pretty much knows whoever the last guy to come in is will be the winner which is why these kind of miss the mark more often than not. Also, there was no way a freshly heel Strong was going to lose. Pretty good wrestling makes it worth watching though.

This would be intermission time at the show. The Briscoes aren’t here yet still which likely isn’t legit. Ad for ROHwrestling.com as they just say it’s intermission. Since this isn’t the live broadcast I get a screen with the sponsor’s name instead.

Davey Richards talks about his family life. Black talks about working hard. It’s one of those interviews where they each talk about something and then you cut to the other guy who answers the same question. I like those as they’re very rapid fire. This goes on for a good while but it makes you want to see the match all the more which is the idea here.

We shift into a promo about Strong wanting the title and how that ties into Edwards vs. Black. It’s kind of odd seeing how much taller Black is than Edwards. Somehow Austin Aries is involved in this too. I really need to actually watch the show to get what’s going on.

We come back to the arena which is more or less empty due to intermission going on but Generico and Steen brawl to the ring out of nowhere. Cabana and Corino come out to make it a four person brawl with Generico winning for the most part before stealing a tie from someone to choke Steen. Nice little bonus here to fill in some time. The tie choking was kind of funny as I’m pretty sure this is after Justin Roberts.

Video airs on the Briscoe Brothers vs. the Kings of Wrestling. Hero got on the Briscoes’ dad and beat him up. This should be a solid match actually. Somehow we have just now hit the halfway point of this show.

Ad for Gofightlive who is airing the PPV. It’s an MMA ad which is weird to see on a wrestling show.

Same ask the fans video from earlier.

Long shot of the arena with the GFL logo on the screen while Missippi Queen plays in the background. And now we get another song as this intermission has now broken 20 minutes. Literally the last 4 minutes have been a logo with music playing and the fans sitting around bored. This is still better than Summerslam 91 where they had a graphic and a countdown clock up for FIFTEEN MINUTES.

Jim Cornette comes out to fill in some more time. Toronto and ROH are awesome don’t you know.

Pick Six Match: Christopher Daniels vs. Kenny Omega

For those of you unfamiliar with the Pick Six, it’s the ranking system for ROH. The idea is that there are six guys ranked 1-6 with Richards being #1 at the moment. Only they can challenge for the title (most of the time. You can win special matches like the gauntlet earlier too) and to get into the list you have to beat a guy on the list. Daniels is #2 and this match is for his spot. If Omega wins here he’s the new #2 and Daniels is #3, and whoever was #6 is off the list.

We start off on the match so I have a feeling this is going to be a long match, especially with an hour and a half to go with three matches left scheduled. We get the dueling chant to show how split the crowd is here. A nice counter to a Rock Bottom results in a standoff. Very even match so far with an emphasis on arm drags. The announcers point out that this isn’t about hatred which is rare to see in wrestling anymore.

Daniels works the neck and hooks a seated Tazmission and a suplex for two. Nice sequence of a slingshot moonsault into a crossface by the bald one. Omega comes back with chops as this isn’t incredibly great but it’s ok. Springboard missile dropkick by Omega doesn’t get a cover. And naturally 3 seconds later he’s in the Koji Clutch, which is a rather difficult looking neck submission which is broken by the ropes.

More neck work doesn’t end this either. Angel’s Wings are countered again as this match is kind of dragging. We slug it out even more and Daniels does the palm strike to the chest and the Rock Bottom sets up the BME which misses. Omega hits a finisher for two of course. I really am starting to hate that. Daniels hits Angel’s Wings, another finisher, and say it with me: it gets two.

Omega hits a double palm strike (Haduken) and it’s called a knockout blow. You know what happens so I’m not even going to validate it with a joke. The fans chant THIS IS WRESTLING. I’m not sure what’s wrong with them but it’s not what I think of when I think of wrestling. An STO sets up the Best Moonsault Ever which ends it.

Rating: B-. Ok. I get the idea of the strong style where you kick out of just about everything, but dude, doing it in every single match makes it look stupid. There’s a reason a move is considered a finisher: it’s supposed to FINISH a match. Back in the late 80s can you imagine a guy kicking out of Hogan’s legdrop? The world would have come to an end. In this match there were at least three finishers that were kicked out of. When that happens continuously it makes the moves look like they’re just big moves rather than devastating ones. I can’t stand that and ROH does it as much as almost any American company. Again, there’s a place for it but don’t do it all the time.

Daniels helps him up and shakes his hand which is always nice to see.

Tag Titles: Briscoe Brothers vs. Kings of Wrestling

This should be awesome. It’s kind of weird watching the Kings as they’re both about 6’5 which means they tower over the vast majority of the roster. Hero and Claudio cut promos saying they appreciate the Briscoes not being allowed to be here, so of course they hit the ring and it’s on. No DQ here which is a surprise I think. Big dive by one of the Brothers takes out the Kings. I’ve never been able to remember which is which so bear with me.

Why do they have to tag in and out? If you can’t get disqualified then what’s stopping them? Hero starts and it’s been one sided the whole way so far. Claudio is finally up in his corner after getting destroyed. The challengers get after Shane Hagadorn and I think you know this isn’t going to work. Claudio is busted open already. Someone that’s either a young boy or an adult woman shouts that Hero is a pussy. I hope it was a girl.

Everything breaks down early and Mark Briscoe is busted open pretty well. Ok now I can tell one from the other. Oh man Mark is busted BAD. The heels have taken over here and we get a gay chant against Hero. Nice double cross body and there’s the hot tag to Jay. He drives Hero’s head into the buckle about 25 times and now he’s busted open. O’Connor Roll gets two but Hagadorn pelts Jay with a chair to put him on the floor. Hagadorn is the Kings’ manager if I forgot to mention that earlier.

Jay is busted open too now. Hero ties Jay to the post with the tag rope Total bloodbath here but they said that at the previous show they had a long technical match so this is far more acceptable. Doomsday Device but with a European Uppercut gets two on Mark. The referee gets a knife from somewhere and cuts Jay free. A Roaring Elbow (Hero’s finisher) gets two.

Jay gets a freaking fire extinguisher of all things and the Kings are in trouble. Table is brought in as Claudio’s cut is more or less closed. The heels are thrown into the table but it doesn’t break. Double team neckbreaker/powerbomb gets no cover. Claudio counters a slam through the table but the Briscoes tackle him into it where his shoulder goes through the edge of it in a painful looking spot.

Doomsday Device to Shane and the Briscoes are standing tall. Hero pops up with his loaded elbow pad and drills Jay with it for TWO and a big pop. We get more gay slurs at Hero with people saying F YOU Hero. If he’s gay as you say you are, wouldn’t he enjoy that in theory? In an AWESOME looking finish, Castagnoli gets a giant swing and the pad is put on Hero’s foot which he kicks Jay in the head with for the pin.

Rating: B. This was supposed to be a big fight and that’s exactly what it was. All kinds of blood (Mark’s face was COVERED), very good violence, the SICK ending and the whole thing going nearly 20 minutes worked very well. They had a technical match already so this is the next logical step. I’m fine with violence like this when it fits the story, which it did here due to the Kings attacking their dad. Very fun match that was exactly what it was supposed to be.

Hey let’s see the same video interviewing the fans again. Amazingly enough their opinions are the same this time too.

ROH World Title: Davey Richards vs. Tyler Black

Jim Cornette is on commentary here so all is right with the world. VERY mixed reaction for Black while the fans all cheer Davey. No handshake here and there’s the bell to a big pop. Fans are behind Davey it seems. Screw that as we slap it out. No real advantage for awhile but Richards gets an awesome surfboard on, only to have it reversed into one by Black.

Total standoff about three minutes in. And now we make fun of HHH because he has no talent or anything like that right? One little thing here is that they refer to Black as the top man in the promotion rather than the top man in the industry. At least they know their place. Sweet dropkick by Black gets one. Cornette lists off the main event scene as Black gets caught by a dropkick to take him down.

Richards has lost a tooth so he kicks the stuffing out of Black to make up for it. We get a modified and PAINFUL looking version of Konnan’s Tequila Sunrise as Richards is in control. Black is all like BRING IT ON and slaps Richards. They slug it out and an enziguri takes Davey down. Cornette on commentary is a nice thing as he can be dramatic but can talk moves as well as anyone.

Tyler throws Davey to the floor and then adds a front flip and a springboard clothesline. He gets chants of YOU STILL SUCK, despite being cheered to no end when he was chasing the title. Joe says the fans will have to respect Black if he wins. That’s just amusing. Richards goes for a German off the top but Black flips out of it. Richards is happy anyway and walks into a big boot. Richards looks like an idiot here because, to quote Marvin the Martian: “Where’s the kaboom? There was supposed to be an Earth shattering kaboom!” Did he just not notice a lack of vibration or sound? Apparently he didn’t because he got kicked in the head.

Rubiks Cube (reverse Piledriver from the shoulders for like of a better term) gets two. Dueling chants of THIS IS AWESOME/YOU STILL SUCK. It turns into a slugout as Black can’t beat him or even get a near fall. Ok, why does no one grab Davey’s leg when he kicks the EXACT same way every time? Richards misses a front flip that puts him in about the third row. Cornette says Richards would walk across fire wearing gasoline underwear to be the best in the world. I’d love to see a show of nothing but Ross and Cornette trying to out metaphor each other.

Jim thinks this is what it was like in the gladiator days. I doubt they used as much spandex…or armdrags…..theme music either….and the fans would chant in Latin. I could probably come up with some more if I had to. Richards gets a shot to the knee and hooks a Texas Cloverleaf. Since that doesn’t work Black gets a suplex off the top and floats over into an F5 for two.

Phoenix Splash (moonsault into a 450) misses and Richards hooks an ankle lock. Screw you Ken Shamrock for making that to look like the best hold ever. Pinfall reversal sequence is always fun to see. We kick it out into a grapevined ankle lock like Angle uses. Richards suplexes both himself and Black over the top to the floor. Black goes into the crowd and Richards is down in the ring.

Hagadorn, Richards’ manager, comes down with a chair but Davey stops him, allowing Black to kick him in the face, knocking the chair into Richards’ face. They slug it out again on the apron and down they both go. Richards sprints back in to save the match as he gets in at about 19.5. Richards kicks out of another finisher, in this case God’s Last Gift which is a Fisherman’s Buster into a small package. Turnbuckle powerbomb sets up a superkick but hey, he only took two finishers so of course Richards can immediately counter into a Dragon Screw Leg Whip and a Cloverleaf.

Hey take a guess as to what we do now. If you guessed slug it out, HOW DID YOU KNOW? Davey takes a superkick and of course just snaps off a clothesline and takes over. Either Richards looks like he’s no selling or Black looks weak. Black’s turn to kick out of a finisher now. Davey gets caught in the buckles and a double stomp from the top gets two for Black.

Finisher #5 or so equals kick out for Richards of course. The fans chant YOU CAN’T BEAT HIM at Tyler so Black kicks him in the face again and another God’s Last Gift ends this kind of anti-climactically. Richards gets helped out of the ring but says now you’re a champion to Black. Black thanks him and we end the show.

Rating: B. This was entertaining, but there are some major flaws in it. Number one: the no selling. I don’t care if this is the ROH style. I don’t care about adrenaline or whatever. Taking back to back finishers and being fine literally 4 seconds later is STUPID. It makes Black look like a joke and it makes Richards look ridiculous. Answer this: if Richards can no sell a buckle bomb and kick with two minutes left in the match, why do the same moves end him 100 seconds later?

Black isn’t innocent here either as the leg work by Davey was completely forgotten 30 seconds later. Number two: Richards is supposed to be the best in the world? That’s a funny one. When 80% of your offense is kicking a guy in the chest over and over, I have an issue with calling you great. That’s my main issue with ROH: there is WAY too big of an emphasis on strikes. We get it: you can chop and kick and it looks like Japan. That isn’t wrestling, it’s a martial arts contest. People can chant this is awesome all they want but the match is flawed.

That being said, the match was indeed entertaining with Black doing everything he could to finish him but never being able to until the very end. However this goes back to what I said earlier about finishers: if you have to use the finisher 4 times to get the win, how is it still classified as a finisher? By that logic you could clothesline a guy 400 times and pin him. The match ended on a clothesline so that’s the finisher. I don’t get the whole best in the world aspect of Richards but he’s pretty good I guess. Black is solid but the psychology here brings it WAY down past what it’s built up to be. Still good though.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s a good show, but to call this the show of the year and give it eternal praise like it’s gotten for three months is absurd. The last two matches are definitely both good and the show as a whole is good, but there are some matches towards the beginning and middle that are just ok. The Daniels match is long and not incredibly entertaining. The gauntlet is ok at its very best. Delirious vs. Aries I don’t even remember and I watched it yesterday. The first two matches are decent but also forgettable. It’s a good show but at three and a half hours with seven matches it’s a far cry from best show of the year.




Extreme Rules 2010 – How Was This A Year Ago?

Extreme Rules 2010
Date: April 25, 2010
Location: 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Arena
Attendance: 12,278
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

Ok so here we are. Again this is hopefully going to be a live review so if it comes off as odd don’t be surprised. This show was plagued by a lack of Raw build up show due to the volcano in Iceland. Even still though, this is a minor PPV as it’s just a rehash of the Mania feuds. This is the show where everything is a gimmick match which is always at least cool in theory. The main event is Batista/Cena in a last man standing match. Let’s get to it.

Opening video more or less says that Extreme rules. Cute. Incredibly stupid, but cute. Rey/Punk gets a higher billing than Edge/Jericho. That’s rather odd. Standard video package that sums up everything. WWE is very user friendly. It’s easy to step into any show and get what’s going on. That’s a HUGE perk for attracting new fans.

Street Fight: HHH vs. Sheamus

WOW. This is the opener? I’m stunned actually. This has been a decent build up to a feud…and there’s no HHH. ICELAND ATTACKS AGAIN! We go to the back and Sheamus has jumped HHH. I like it. It gives things a feeling of you don’t know what’s coming which is a very nice touch to say the least. The pale one has a steel pipe and gets in a solid shot on HHH’s head. I guess this has officially started but I’m not sure. The referee calls for the medic and we go to the arena.

And Big Show and Miz are here. Ok then. These two aren’t scheduled but I’d bet on a tag title match. They’re not scheduled but they just happen to have their wrestling gear on. The jacket on Miz works in some weird way. Miz has risen so far so fast that it’s amazing. I think Bret is going to be here soon.

Oh apparently they’re moving that to tomorrow. They say they have a lack of competition and they’re praying for opponents. I smell Kane for some reason. Here’s Teddy Long. He makes ShowMiz vs. a team of his choosing. This is just for a title shot, not the titles. Got it. And the opponents are….not announced yet. I’m liking this live way of reviewing actually. Ah .

Tag Team Gauntlet

R-Truth and Morrison are opening us up here. This is the first of three teams. I know this is a rematch of Mania but come on now. Actually this works so I can’t complain that much. Cole says the fans are behind the face team. NO REALLY? It’s a bit better than the previous one at Mania, but not by much. Morrison screws up and gets disqualified by not letting Show out of the ropes when he has a triangle choke on. Ok then.

Team number two is MVP/Mark Henry. This is rather short but it works fine I guess. Without going into details, MVP gets punched and pinned.

Cue Hart Dynasty, Hart Attack, pin. Literally, that’s it.

Rating: N/A. Too much of a mess to really grade it as a regular match. Something like this was needed to flesh out the card though. It came off fine though.

Grisham tries to give us an update on HHH but Sheamus says he’ll have to forfeit or get a worse beating.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Remember if Punk loses his head is shaved. Punk NEEDS this. Rey is wearing a Skelator mask. Ok then. Punk hits that sweet powerslam of his. In a nice spot, Punk just throws Punk under the ropes so he crashes into the floor. Nicely done. Gallows has a bit of an Austin look going for him.

Decent match far and longer than their Mania one I think. Come on WWE don’t kill Punk off yet. He busts out a bow and arrow of all things. Nice. Striker tries to turn Cole and Lawler to Straightedge. I like it. Punk busts out a freaking Gory Special of all things. See? Even back then they had special moves. No Mercy stole from them! Punk is more or less dominating, which scares me to no end. Serena stops the 619 and she and Gallows get ejected.

Rey hits an Asai Moonsault to get right back into it. Crowd is red hot by the way. Rey gets a seated senton but Punk hits a dropkick to make the save. This is a storied rivalry already. No Striker. Just no. Punk hits his springboard clothesline and I can’t stand Rey anymore. Seriously, get over the whole overcoming the odds idea.

It’s just stupid anymore. GTS is countered into a rana for 2 and then punk kicks Rey’s head off. Solid match to put it mildly. Rey gets the freaking 619 and someone slides a chair into the ring. It’s a bald guy that slides under the ring. No clue who that was. He also drops Rey with something on the floor and Rey is out. GTS ends it. YES!

Rating: A-. VERY good match that had me wondering who would win up until the very end. Also, this is the way the match needed to end. Rey needed to lose here and Punk now has a credible win in this gimmick. That was a great match though. Love it and yes my Punk bias likely has a lot to do with it but still.

Strap Match: JTG vs. Shad Gaspar

It’s the four corners version here which I’m in the minority that actually prefers it that way. I just could not care less about this match. I truly couldn’t. JTG needs to win to regain credibility apparently. That would imply he had it to begin with, which is a straight up lie. Shad is dominating for the most part here. Yeah riveting.

Wow the crowd is SILENT for this. Who would have seen that coming? Shad just destroys JTG here and beats on him with the strap sans mercy. Shad gets his first three…and JTG does the same three. Not THIS finish again. Yep. JTG hits his finisher and dives for the 4th corner. Screw me running at least it’s over.

Rating: D-. And I like these kinds of matches. The crowd simply could not care less and it came off very clearly here. I mean NO ONE cared. Just boring here with two guys that have no heat on them at all. At least it’s over though.

HHH can’t fight tonight. Yeah I’ll buy that.

Orton vs. Swagger is next? Really? We hit the recap. You know the drill by now.

Smackdown World Title: Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger

Remember it’s Extreme Rules which I guess means no rules? Crowd loves them some Orton. Swagger controls early on as you would expect. I’m hoping they don’t make the switch tonight. Orton chasing the title for a few months would be nice. Also Swagger needs the credibility that the title gives him.

I love how more or less the announcers say Orton has nothing but the RKO. That’s not that nice. Swagger is dominating but Orton gets a belt shot to break that up. Ok then. Orton hits that same powerslam that Punk hit earlier. Swagger counters the elevated DDT too. Nicely done. It’s garbage can time.

SICK shots with it from Orton. Those were nice. Orton is going off now and it’s awesome. Orton does a stomp to Swagger’s head while he’s on the steps. Ow. The knee drop misses though and Swagger hits the floor. Naturally he gets caught in the elevated DDT though and it’s Orton setting for the RKO now. Hint: when he slaps the mat and shouts, it means RKO is coming.

Instead though he sets up a chair but the RKO onto it is countered. Well kind of it was. The look came off terribly but I get the concept. Gutwrench powerbomb hits and Swagger gets the pin. HUGE win there. That was all Swagger as he countered the RKO and got the pin. All Swagger there. Post match Orton gets the RKO to keep the tweener thing going.

Rating: B-. Not great but the booking was exactly right. This was a decent little match as Swagger is getting better and better in the ring. I liked it for what it was. No classic but not bad at all.

And here’s Sheamus. Ok then. And despite not being able to feel his hand, here comes HHH. Ok, if he wins here, I give up.

Street Fight: Sheamus vs. HHH

HHH of course controls to start things off which is bearable I guess. He hits the spinebuster but can’t get the Pedigree because of the arm being how hurt it is. Now this is more like it. He’s just ramming HHH into the barricade over and over again. I forgot this is a street fight. That’s not a good sign at all.

Striker and King are arguing like no other here and it’s coming off as great. Striker says he and Lawler have both wrestled hurt. That’s rather stupid. Striker wrestled for what, a year or so? Just seems ridiculous to compare the two of them. And of course HHH has the energy to use a DDT with his left arm.

HHH grabs a pipe and smacks HHH in the head with it. Naturally he kicks out. Sure why not? Apparently after a massive Irish man blasts you in the head with a steel pipe you can kick out via instinct. Sure why not? Celtic Cross is blocked. Apparently that’s called Pale Justice now. HHH gets a kendo stick and all of a sudden his arm is fine. That makes my head hurt. This has at least picked up a bit. Pump kick hits though. A second kick hits and it’s all Sheamus.

Naturally he lets HHH get up and the third and fourth kicks land to FINALLY end him. And remember kiddies: do not attempt making yourself look that strong without a licensed wife with connections. To be fair, the ending makes this a lot more bearable. Post match he fights off a cervical collar and tries to crawl off. He’s almost to the entrance when Sheamus hits ANOTHER kick to put him down again. Nice.

Rating: C-. The second half saved this match. The first half was borderline failure but the weapons helped it a lot. Sheamus winning is the right thing though, period. Yes HHH looked very strong, but to be fair he laid down at the end of the match and that’s what counts at the end of the day. Not terrible but more about the angle afterwards than the match.

Ad for Over the Limit. Oh dear.

Edge is getting ready.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Michelle McCool

This is an Extreme Makeover match. Michelle looks great of course. The music helps a lot here for her I think. There’s a table of makeup etc at ringside. Beth gets a semi-pop. Can someone shut Beth up? Please? Michelle is possibly the best women’s athlete ever? Really? That’s just pitiful.

Basically we’re just making fun of Vickie and using random weapons like hairspray and ironing boards. Beth counters the hairspray again and it’s one on one now. Vickie has a broom. Make your own jokes. Glam Slam ends it like it should have.

Rating: D. And that’s mainly due to Beth’s awesome cleavage in this one. This was a comedy match to put it nicely and it didn’t come off well to put it nicely. The girls looked hot, but having them use things like makeup and ironing boards? Really?

Ad for the Mania DVD.

Jericho does his usual great promo about how it ends tonight. He looks buff to say the least.

No recap actually.

Cage Match: Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Ah ok we got a quick recap after Edge’s intro. Makes more sense. Jericho stalls a lot to play himself some heel. Ah there we go now they’re both in. And we see Jericho’s tights pulled down. Didn’t need that one there. Jericho gets rammed into the cage. Striker: The metal militia bares its fangs.

Edge goes for the spear but misses entirely. That’s never a good thing. I love that springboard dropkick that Jericho busts out from time to time. Striker talks about footwork and Lawler just couldn’t care less. In a cool spot, Jericho hits a leg whip from the top into the Walls. Nicely done. Edge does the climb the ropes spot to get out which is a nice counter.

Jericho has the door open and knocks Edge to the middle of the ring. Then of course like an idiot he gets out of the cage and goes back in. Yeah he’s an idiot. Edge hits a fast spear for two. Codebreaker gets two and we fight on top of the cage for a bit. Edge gets crotched and Jericho gets out AGAIN but this time Edge stops him from falling.

We fight on top even more and Jericho comes back into the cage. And so does Edge. In a NICE spot, Edge is standing on the top rope and Jericho gets a running start, hits the other rope and into a Codebreaker so both guys are down. Nice. That only gets two for a pretty weak pop. Jericho goes for the top of the cage but Edge saves again.

He slams the door on Jericho’s ankle. That would freaking hurt. Edge spins the ankle around in a weird move. This is more psychological than anything else. Ok not really but there’s some of it in there. More ankle work. Edge hits a CRAP spear for the pin. Why does the announcer’s voice always crack when he’s saying superstar?

Rating: B. Good match here but not great. If nothing else, this gives Edge the definitive win here. That’s the biggest thing I think. It wasn’t great, but it did its purpose. Solid stuff, but nothing great though. Also, stop the stupid pinning in the cage. It’s just so idiotic. Two men enter, one man leaves. Not two men enter, one keeps the other down for three seconds.

We recap Cena vs. Batista. You know it by now.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Batista

We get the big match intros. Depending on the source you read, this might be Big Dave’s last match. We get some feeling out stuff and then Batista is like screw it I’m getting a chair. Naturally this doesn’t work. When did so many people start using the big boot? FU doesn’t hit and Cena is thrown into the post.

Batista goes for the knee because that strategy always works in these things right? He does that for a good while. Cena gets a reversal into the steps to get Cena back to about even. Batista busts out a freaking figure four. Well you can’t fault him for a lack of psychology. Cena goes into his sequence but Batista hits the floor.

FU onto the chair hits but it gets 8. Wow that’s odd to type. Spinebuster gets 8 for Big Dave. Cena goes thgrough a table and of course that’s not enough. Batista is looking for plundah, perhaps a bicycle, when a kid yells that he hates the Animal. The Animal feels the same way. Cena puts him through the announce table. You can kind of say this is a paint by numbers thing. It’s not but you could say it is. STFU goes on and Big Dave taps, but you can’t win that way.

He’s out but gets up at 9. Nice little throwback (I crack myself up) to Raw two weeks ago. With nothing else left, Cena crotches him on the post and busts out Duct Tape to tie his legs together. Since he isn’t standing, that’s good enough to retain. Or win the title according to the main page.

Rating: B. Solid match but nothing classic. Cena beats Batista again to end the feud and possibly end Batista. This was fine for what it was, which is something I think people need to keep in mind. They weren’t going for a classic showdown here. That was at Mania. This was the violence aspect of it and more about a definitive ending. You have to keep that in mind on matches like these as it’s a huge difference in style and goals.

Overall Rating: B. I thought this was solid. Not great, but solid. Again, you have to keep in mind what you’re looking at here. Just by the name alone, Extreme Rules, you know this isn’t a standard PPV. It was a gimmick show and there’s nothing wrong with that at all. There isn’t a truly bad match all show, with the strap match and I guess the Divas match being the low points.

However you have a surprise ending and hot women. What more do you need? As for the best part of this show, the youth movement continues. Swagger gets a HUGE win over Orton and did it on his own. He countered the RKO, he hit the Bomb, he got the pin. That’s all you need. Also, Punk got the win that the needed in a great match. All of a sudden, he has credibility and momentum all over again. That’s all you need again.

Oh and Sheamus beats the crap out of HHH. Overall, this show did a great job of closing a lot of doors and getting the rest of the ones opened that need to be opened. This was a successful show. I’ll go with that. Oh and one more thing: there was a feeling of you didn’t know what was coming due to the opening of the show. That’s a very important thing there and it worked very well.

Punk/Mysterio and the main event are worth seeing. Everything else is decent enough for a watch later on. This isn’t a great show, but in a few years it would be a great way to kill an afternoon when it’s raining. Good show.




Impact – October 14, 2010 – Bound For Glory Fallout

It’s been about six months since this show and I thought it would be interesting to look back and see how things have gone since then.

Impact
Date: October 14, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
Episode Title: THEY Have Arrived!!!

Well this is it. After four days of waiting we can finally get to the explanation from Jeff as to WHY he did what he did. This is something that is very important because you have the entire THEY angle riding on it. The importance of this show can’t be overblown as we begin the next chapter in TNA’s history.

The opening is likely to be about Jeff and THEY as well as set up the fairly obvious RVD vs. Jeff match, although I could see them postponing that one if need be. I’d also be interested in knowing how much actual wrestling we’ll have tonight but we’ll see. Let’s get to it.

We of course open with the recap of the ending of Bound For Glory.

Dixie’s attorney is here and as everyone thought we’re told that Dixie signed the contracts but they weren’t the ones she thought they were.

Hogan (still on crutches) and Bischoff are here to a MASSIVE pyro display. Of course Hogan is acting just like he did as a face. Tenay explains that Hogan and Bischoff now have the majority share of TNA….despite the fact that the attorney never said that.

Naturally Hogan gets a big face reaction with like two signs against him in the whole audience. Oh wait three fat chicks are booing. Well there’s a Hogan sucks chant so there’s something I suppose. Hogan wants Dixie here now. Apparently she promised him everything, much like Ted Turner did in 96. Hogan gets a text or something as he has his phone out and is messing with it.

Here we go: the explanation. It started with Abyss apparently and the Hall of Fame ring. Bischoff and Hogan knew why he randomly turned on Hogan. We bring him out and Hogan declares Abyss his son. THEY’RE HERE! Ok now that my pizzas are here we can get back. What did you think I meant by they?

None of the fans believed Abyss but they are now in control. The fans want RVD. Abyss follows them as Hogan and Bischoff’s soldier now. Hogan declares that Abyss with live forever and is now immortal. I think The Immortals might be the name. Eric brings out Jarrett. Wait was there an actual explanation in there for abyss? If there was I missed it.

Yeah this was no real surprise: he wanted control of his company back. I think that was the easiest of all to understand. And here’s FOURTUNE! Ok this just got good.

Flair talks to Hogan and says that Fourtune runs this company, not Hogan. LOUD Fourtune chant. One of them have to leave apparently. Hogan suggest him vs. Flair and it’s…..not on as they hug. Flair bows down to Hogan and it’s a massive Hogan orgy more or less. The explanation here makes sense though as Fourtune was mad at Dixie for bringing in EV. That actually makes sense. We get a reference to Flair’s five former ex wives and here comes Jeff!

No face paint here either. The fans think Jeff sold out. You can barely see the ropes with so many guys in there with him. He didn’t sell out but sold in. He blames the fans and doesn’t care about popularity. The fans drove him to this because he did everything with all those injuries for what?

And now it’s on to RVD. He’s the whole F’N reason Abyss took RVD out because RVD had to be gone for this to work. They are Immortal. Sting and Nash are watching in the back. Eric and Hogan offer them spots on the team. We go to a break 22 minutes into the show with them coming to the ring.

Security escorts Dixie….somewhere.

Nash and Sting come out and Sting is in street clothes which isn’t something you see that often. Tenay is already annoying. Eric says this is about money and all that jazz. Nash whispers to Sting and says this is perfect for him because it’s always been about money and him in his career. He’s gotten wiser though and quotes the Bible of all things, saying gray hair is a sign of wisdom. He’s passing on the money and if THEY want to run the company into the ground, they can do it without him. I’m surprised.

Sting says this isn’t what he came here for and says he’s here because he loves TNA. He’s shouting the whole time mind you. Sting points to Hogan, Bischoff and Flair (I think) and says this is a no win situation, turning them down. Allegedly both of these guys are leaving TNA with Nash being permanent and Sting possibly being permanent. Bischoff says they can come back anytime. Hogan’s music plays the segment to an end at 9:32.

We cut to the back where Sting and Nash leave but Pope isn’t happy with it. They offer him a place in the car out with them but he’s staying to fight the fight which they’re cool with. Dixie comes up to them and says they can’t leave her. Sting says what everyone thought: if she had listened this wouldn’t be happening. She says he was cryptic. Dixie, he sent crows down at the NWO to demand a title match one night. He’s a weird guy.

Hogan and Bischoff come up to Dixie and she slaps the heck out of Bischoff. She tells Hogan to look her in the eye and tell her he didn’t screw her. He says we’ll talk about this in HIS office as we go to another break.

In the office we have MORE talking. Bischoff smokes a cigar and Hogan flat out tells her that he screwed her out of the company. This is a big Hogan ego trip of course. Hogan and Bischoff both say this is their company. Hogan has had enough and so has Dixie. She tells her security guards to get rid of them but they work for Hogan too. Dixie’s husband SURGE gets knocked out and we take ANOTHER break.

Some hot chick in a BMW shows up. And we’re just not going to talk about this at all. Ok then. Ah ok it’s the Jersey Short chick.

Madison comes out with a referee as I’m guessing this is going to be about Tara. She yells about how Tara has HER title. She wants a match RIGHT NOW. Here’s Tara, looking GOOD. Madison says they had a deal and apparently we’re getting a match….at 9:50pm.

Knockouts Title: Tara vs. Madison Rayne

And Tara lays down so Madison can pin her. I kid you not.

Madison celebrates and here’s Mickie to talk some more. She wants a title shot RIGHT NOW but Madison sends Tara after her. Mickie sends her running and stares her down.

J-Woww from Jersey Shore comes in and talks to the Beautiful People. Apparently she’s an honorary BP tonight.

Back from break and they’re still looking for Cookie. This results in Eric Young freaking out about J-Woww. Jordan comes up and nothing of note happens.

And here’s Angle for MORE talking. No music, no intro, nothing like that. He talks about how he’s all banged up but wants to know why Hogan and Bischoff screwed him before he officially retires. Angle says what we all expected him to say: he didn’t win but he didn’t get pinned either. Cue Jarrett’s music and here he is.

Jarrett more or less calls bull on what Angle is saying. He takes a jab at Angle being an ex-husband (the real meaning being that Jarrett literally married Angle’s wife and not in kayfabe). Angle says he put TNA on the map. Uh, not quite Kurt. He says Jarrett held down everyone but couldn’t hold Angle down.

Kurt Angle, the man that held the tag titles, X-Division and World titles at the same time is talking about holding others down. Jarrett says taking Angle’s career meant more than destroying his life. Angle goes for him and the security guards take him down and handcuff him. The beatdown is on. Uh, Joe anyone?

TAZ of all people comes out of the broadcast booth and calls off Jarrett and says that he has a censored up (censored of course) neck. Old school Taz chant takes us to another break.

70 minutes in, 6 seconds of “wrestling.”

Joe talks (shocking isn’t it) about Jarrett on a tape from Monday, still in Daytona. He’s coming for Jarrett of course.

GOOD NIGHT  IT’S A MATCH! And it’s Abyss. Oh joy.

Abyss vs. Samoa Joe

Yeah they’re officially called Immortal. Well ok then. Joe beats the heck out of him first and beats him into the corner. Chokeslam takes him down and Joe is in trouble. He goes to get a chair but Joe hits a suicide dive into the chair which more or less didn’t hit Abyss’s head at all but he stays down anyway. Sure why not? Bell to the head and we’re done in two minutes. No rating. RVD comes down for the save.

Wait, why didn’t Joe come down and massacre Jeff like 5 minutes ago?

Hey look RVD wants to talk. It’s about Hardy which makes sense. Jeff pops up on the screen and says it was an illusion as he brought RVD as close to him as he could and then destroyed him. Well ok so he told Abyss to destroy him. Hardy says he’s the Anti-Christ of wrestling. WOW.

Bischoff comes out and says if RVD wants Hardy at Turning Point he has to beat Anderson tonight, winner gets the shot.

Back from a break Tessmacher is propositioned by Bischoff for “a meeting later at his place”. He snaps on her and calls her easy. Bischoff knows about Nash and Pope apparently. She’s fired from the Knockouts authority job and can either wrestle or leave. Anderson comes up and declares Bischoff a douchebag and squeezes his hand really hard saying that Bischoff won’t win this war.

D’Angeol Dinero vs. Fourtune

Yep it’s 1 vs. 5 here. Morgan and Flair aren’t in this. Total dominance here of course but it’s better than more talking I suppose. AJ misses the Pele and kicks Kaz which Pope gets two off of. DWI hits him and Kaz gets the pin. Another short match so no grade.

Ad for Turning Point where Angle is named specifically as being there. Nice one guys.

Here’s The Shore to get on my nerves and be booed out of the building. They point out that this is on at the same time as Jersey Shore because that’s how TNA works. Cue up the Beautiful People and J-Woww. Cookie and J-Woww argue as usual and Cookie says go back to the hole you came from. You know, the same one she’s from. Catfight, Shore bails. 15k for a minute long segment and an EY joke.

We recap things to kill time so we can run over into ReAction as always.

Mr. Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam

No mic time for Anderson here as he’s mad. The bell rings at about 11pm as we just HAD to have a commercial as RVD made his entrance. Make that 11:01. Naturally to see the main event of Impact you have to watch ReAction. So would that mean the winner got the win on Impact or ReAction? Winner gets Hardy at the PPV mind you.

Basic stuff to start as Van Dam hits a moonsault off the apron to kick Anderson in the head, which might have been how he injured his head and Impact is OVER! And now REACTION has started and we didn’t miss a thing and it serves no purpose but screw that who cares? If you want to see the Impact main event, don’t watch Impact!

After I have a psychotic episode over the stupidity of some of the things this company does, it’s still a boring match. Rolling Thunder is countered into a fireman’s carry and the split legged moonsault gets two. Five Star eats knees and both guys are down. And here’s Bischoff to screw us over. He tells the referee to come with him and here’s Hardy, holding his ribs with a chair.

Chair to RVD. Chair to Anderson. Pillmanizer on the arm of Anderson. Anderson curses a lot and rolls to the floor. That’s your ending by the way.

Rating: D+. Match was pretty weak due to the crowd knowing the ridiculous ending was coming. This match never really got off the ground or anything but it could have been worse. The guys knew the ending was coming and clearly didn’t get going until the very end as they were just going through the motions. Nothing bad really, but nothing particularly good.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a VERY subjective grade to put it mildly. This show can be looked at their get out of jail free card. It was the first show after their biggest show ever and a huge angle. The show as a stand alone show was atrocious. However, this was a show where a lot of talking was actually required.

The explanations that they gave needed to be done. I can understand that and I’m mostly ok with it. However there comes a point where you need some wrestling to get you through a show. Having the show revolve around one angle is fine and makes sense, but you really need some wrestling to go with it. As was said in the LD, even a 4 minute throw away match would have helped tremendously. One or two of those thrown in somewhere and this show goes WAY up.

As for doing what needed to be done tonight, they got a lot out of the way. Jarrett, Dixie, Hogan and Bischoff are all explained. Nash and Sting are written off TV, Pope has a new thing to do, Anderson’s loyalty is pretty clear and RVD and Joe will fight on their own. Hardy was explained but to say it felt rushed is an understatement. Abyss wasn’t explained at all but did we really need to hear about him? All you really get from that is the beginning of the story and we can live without that.

This show did explain some things and kind of got things going for the angle, but at the same time this is showing signs of turning into one massive soap opera much like the NWO angle. The problem with that is back then you had some amazing matches on the side to compliment the drama. You’re not getting that in the first week.

That being said, it’s the first week and I can understand a ton of talking here. However if this is now the status quo, there are REAL problems for this company. This was kind of a disappointment but to say it was horrible isn’t fair. They got through a lot tonight, but what scares me are the weeks to come. There has to be some wrestling out there, and I’m not seeing it here so far. I’m neither thrilled nor optimistic, but I’m also not convinced this is bad. Definitely interested in next week’s offering, but I’ll be less lenient on it to say the least.