Smackdown – July 22, 2011 – One Long Street Fight

Smackdown
Date: July 22, 2011
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

Money in the Bank is over and the question is simple: can Christian make it through one whole show as world champion? He won the title from Orton in the first instance I can ever remember where the “if the champion gets disqualified he loses the title” stipulation actually worked. Also Daniel Bryan now has the MITB case so there’s always the chance of a cash in starting tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open the show with Orton sitting in a chair in the middle of the ring. His says his name is Randy Orton. I wonder if he loves to fight. Although there’s a lot going on in the WWE at the moment, this show isn’t going anywhere until his issue with Christian is settled. We get a clip of Orton destroying Christian post match and here’s the new champion.

Christian wants to know what unfinished business Orton is talking about. Orton says as long as Christian is breathing there’s unfinished business. Christian thinks the unfinished business is with the voices Orton has in his head. Orton says Christian has been hiding behind a team of lawyers but Christian says Orton simply broke the rules. Christian says that he’s been fighting incompetence for a long time now and also the unseen forces that keeps Randy on top. He’s beaten them all though and is now a two time world champion.

There won’t be a celebration tonight because nothing has changed over the last few months. He’s not going to talk to these people because they still treat him badly. Orton says these people are going to see him beat Christian tonight because he wants his rematch. Christian says no because rematches don’t grow on trees. Is he new here or something?

The champ says he’s going to leave and talk to his lawyers about the situation. Orton comes after him but here’s Teddy of course to break that up. Teddy says Orton will get his rematch but not tonight because he has Kane in a street fight. Orton needs to be the bigger man and that just doesn’t happen. He takes Christian down and hammers away for a bit until the referees pull him off. Christian gets in Teddy’s face but Teddy says get to the ring because Christian has a match with Big Zeke right now.

Ezekiel Jackson vs. Christian

Non-title here. Jackson comes out after a quick break. Christian immediately heads to the floor to hide for a bit. They get into the ring and no mention has been made yet of their ECW days. Total power game from Jackson to start us off and a long gorilla press slam puts the Canadian down. Jackson slams him again and sends him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Jackson slamming Christian into the announce table on the floor.

Christian ducks low and Jackson eats steps and the momentum shifts. That gets two back in the ring. Christian uses some basic stuff but Jackson gets a shot to the ribs and takes over one more time. Actually scratch that as Christian nails him in the ribs and stops the momentum. Booker says Christian can pull this off. He’s the world champion. Shouldn’t it be Jackson that can pull this off?

Off to a chinlock and it’s Jackson in trouble again. Jackson escapes with a Samoan Drop and starts firing off clotheslines. Christian avoids one but can’t hit the Killswitch. Here come the slams but Christian escapes and goes to the knee. Killswitch doesn’t work again and Jackson gets him on his shoulder. Jackson charges shoulder first into the post though and the Killswitch ends this at 6:39 shown of 10:09.

Rating: C. Match was fine but I really don’t get the need to have Jackson lose again. Isn’t there some non champion midcarder that could have done this? It’s not like Jackson should have beaten him but I don’t get the point in having him lose like that. Christian needed the clean win over someone though so that was fine for the most part.

Here’s Cole to bring out Daniel Bryan. Cole says it was a fluke win at MITB and Bryan says he doesn’t care what Cole says. Cole makes fun of Bryan for being all valiant but he knows Bryan is going to cash in like everyone else has: when the champion is down and out. Bryan doesn’t deserve to have that case. Bryan says Cole didn’t deserve to be in a featured match at Mania. No one deserves anything in this company and he’s earned his spot over the last 12 years.

He lists off some of his injuries such as a detached retina and not being able to hear out of his left ear due to being kicked in the head so much. However he won’t quit because he’s dreamed of being WWE Champion since he was a kid. The person who holds the case can cash it in whenever and wherever they want. Bryan however is going to cash it in at Wrestlemania. I’ll believe that when I see it. Heath Slater of all people comes out and calls Bryan a loser.

Heath Slater vs. Daniel Bryan

Slater starts off in trouble and has to escape the LeBell Lock by going to the floor. We take a break and come back with Bryan tossing him around with an armdrag. Bryan is now in the top of Booker’s Fave Five now. Slater throws on a headlock and takes over. Hard whip into the corner puts Bryan down. Bryan starts fighting back and the crowd is cheering so hard that they’re not even moving.

Booker says Slater has the same amount of charisma as a bowl full of turnips. Slater puts him down again as Cole keeps saying it was a fluke. Back to the chinlock as Booker and Cole get into their bickering again. Josh as usual gets us back to the match because he’s the responsible one. Bryan makes a comeback with a flying forearm and both guys are down. Daniel lowers his head and gets kicked in the face for his troubles.

Slater charges at him and goes crashing to the floor. Bryan hits a running kick from the apron and back inside we go. Missile dropkick gets two. Slater grabs a spinebuster for two. Pinfall reversal sequence gets some two counts for both guys. Bryan sets for what looks like a tornado DDT but goes into a guillotine choke instead for the tap at 7:25 shown of 10:55.

Rating: C+. Good match here as Bryan got to showcase himself pretty well. This is what he needs: matches where he can show off his skills and get the win at the end because since he lost the US Title he hasn’t done much. He’s gotten a little resurgence leading up to the MITB win so it’s not totally out of nowhere but he needs some resume building wins.

We recap Big Show vs. Henry at the PPV where Henry hurt Show’s leg post match.

Henry says the destruction will never end because the attack on Show gave him a pleasure. If it sounds like he’s talking about himself, it’s because he is. His words there, not mine.

We get the Vince/Cena/HHH video from Raw which eats up about ten minutes. Josh wouldn’t say Punk’s name leading into the segment.

Sheamus vs. Wade Barrett

Fallout from the MITB build here. The announcers touch on Cara being out due to the “injuries” he suffered in the ladder match. Sheamus hammers him down to start but Barrett gets his foot up in the corner to take over. Cole says Sheamus has a degree in computer technology and Barrett has one in marine biology. Never would have guessed those. Wade chokes Sheamus out on the top rope and then kicks pale boy to the floor.

That gets two back in the ring. Barrett has been dropped from the Fave Five. We get a Harvey Whippleman reference for no apparent reason. Sheamus grabs the Irish Curse for two. He pounds away even more like the brawler he is and they head to the floor. It turns into a slugout and neither guy can really get an advantage. They fight to the announce table and it’s a double countout at 4:29.

Rating: C+. I like big man brawls like these where they don’t really care about the pin and it’s about the fight. Neither guy could really lose here so the ending was the right idea. I’d like to see more of this but then again I like both guys. Either way, fun brawl that probably will lead to something more from them later.

They keep fighting post match and Barrett tries Wasteland, only to take the Brogue Kick to leave Sheamus standing tall.

Kane says he’s going to unleash his pain and misery tonight. Lately he’s been haunted and tonight he’s going to try to escape that. He’s been feeling too human lately and doesn’t like it at all. He uses the Devil’s Favorite Demon line for the first time in many months.

Randy Orton vs. Kane

This is a street fight. They have a ton of time left to do this also. Kane fires away to start and beats Orton down in the corner. Orton gets a boot up though and there’s the Thesz Press. Kane grabs him by the throat but Orton counters into a failed RKO attempt. Out to the floor we go They fight up the ramp and neither guy can get much of an extended advantage.

Orton rams Kane into the railing and finds a kendo stick. He’s getting all googly eyed and slides back in so he can bust out the elevated DDT. That fails completely and Orton is sent back over the top and out to the floor. Orton goes into the railing as we take a break. Back with Kane still in control and getting a two count. Orton low bridges Kane to send him to the floor but jumps into an uppercut.

Kane sets up the announce table but Orton escapes the chokeslam attempt. Orton climbs up onto the table to escape but it falls forward and Randy is holding his knee. He’s up again but he’s limping. Kane’s knees go into the steps in a wicked shot and Randy hammers away. Orton puts Kane’s leg on the step and stomps it into the steel and then slams the steps down onto it. We take another break and come back with Orton hammering away at the leg/ankle.

Kane fires off a big boot to take Orton down. He goes up but Orton avoids him and sends Kane’s shoulder into the post. Elevated DDT hits and it’s RKO time. That doesn’t work and Kane hits the side slam for two. Now the big clothesline hits and Kane calls for the chokeslam. Orton is like screw that and grabs an RKO out of nowhere for a VERY close two. Kane can’t get up so Orton sets up the Punt. The Big Bald pops up and hits a chokeslam for two.

We take an almost unprecedented third break as this match is going to get 20 minutes minimum. Back with Kane picking up a chair. He drills Orton four times with it and loads up a tombstone onto it. Randy escapes that and also escapes a chokeslam onto it. The RKO onto the chair ends this at 14:08 shown of 25:38 (remember that I assume 3:30 per break so the match could have been much shorter or even a bit longer).

Rating: B-. This was good but not great. For a TV match it took up a very long time which probably wasn’t a great idea. They never really hit a high gear but the match itself was fine. I do kind of question giving this so long and giving Barrett vs. Sheamus four minutes as you could have balanced this out a lot better. Still though, good stuff for a long match.

Post match Kane takes his glove off and shakes hands with Randy. I don’t ever remember seeing his right hand. Kane gets up after Orton leaves and the fans applaud him. Geez another turn for the Big Bald? Mark Henry comes out before Kane can leave though and he doesn’t look nice. Remember Kane has a very bad knee here and can barely stand. Kane fires off on him but Henry takes the knee out. Henry gets him down as I guess Kane’s new buddy Orton doesn’t need to help Kane. Kane gets the same treatment Show got at the PPV.

Overall Rating: B. This was an odd show at times as not a lot happened. You had some long matches and a lot of wrestling, but at the same time a lot of people weren’t here at all and weren’t mentioned. The main event is long and probably too long for what it was. The ending is kind of weird as Henry claims another victim, but it keeps Henry’s push going. Either way, good show but not a classic or anything.

Results

Christian b. Ezekiel Jackson – Killswitch

Daniel Bryan b. Heath Slater – Guillotine choke

Sheamus vs. Wade Barrett went to a double countout

Randy Orton b. Kane – RKO onto a chair




Impact Wrestling – July 21, 2011 – Four Knockout Brawls? Seriously?

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 21, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Sting is world champion again and it’s time to begin the road to Hardcore Justice and his match with Angle. It seems that they’re going to build towards the main event on the idea that Angle has never beaten Sting which isn’t true but it was long enough ago that I doubt many people remember it. Anyway, there’s also a BFG Series four way ladder match tonight so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week with the clowns and Sting winning the title thanks to Angle.

Here’s the new champ to open the show. He says hi to his mom and says that he’s back on track now, much to the chagrin of Hogan and Bischoff. He’s still insane here. Game on apparently. Sting says this is supposed to be the part of the promo where he’s supposed to talk about how we can do this the easy way or the hard way but he stops and says it’ll just be his way.

Sting says he’s insane and there’s a good feeling about it. The insane asylum is open now. He wants Hogan and Bischoff to come out and here’s a clown instead. It’s Angle and he takes off the mask to prove it. He gets in the ring and says he respects Sting because Sting is the champion. Even though Sting is trying to get the company back in the hands of Dixie Carter, Sting has what Angle wants.

Angle says that both of them are legends but only one can be champion. It has to be him because he’s given himself no other choice. Sting says that they have a dilemma here but Immortal, in the form of Anderson and Ray, cut them off. Ray mentions the obvious tag match and talks about using a bat on the ribs of Angle, like Angle did last week. Ray works hard on his abs and didn’t like a bat going into them. Anderson says he didn’t work so hard to get it all taken away from him like that. Sting has to deal with him tonight.

Bound For Glory standings:

Crimson 31

Gunner 21

D-Von 21

Matt Morgan 14

AJ Styles 14

James Storm 14

Rob Van Dam 14

Bully Ray 14

Scott Steiner 7

Bobby Roode 7

The Pope 0

Samoa Joe 0

Bound For Glory Series: Scott Steiner vs. Rob Van Dam

Steiner jumps him almost immediately and hits the overhead belly to belly to take over. Rob can’t get anything going and we hit a bow and arrow hold. Steiner looks like he has a new tattoo that looks like a chain around his neck. Rob gets out of the corner and this a nice superkick to put Scott down for a second. Out to the floor and RVD gets the spinning leg drop which needs a name.

Back inside and Steiner wants time out. Rob instead hits him in the face. Steiner gets a boot up in the corner and hits the spinning belly to belly. Now Rob gets a foot in Scott’s face to set up Rolling Thunder for two. Into the corner they go and Scott gets an elevated Downward Spiral for two as Rob gets his foot on the rope. Steiner Line sets up the pushups which the referee goes up and down with for some reason. Steiner yells at him for it and Rob rolls him up for the pin at 6:05.

Rating: C. Just a match here for the most part. Power vs. speed is my favorite match variety so this worked fine. Scott can be a decent bully when he wants to be. Van Dam does little more than signature moves anymore which is a bit of a problem but that comes with age I guess. Either way, nothing great but fine for what it was.

Mickie is here and wants to talk to Velvet. Here she is completely with the shaking entrance. Mickie talks about how she’s seen people going after Velvet and blame her for all kinds of stuff. That’s why Mickie is honored to give Velvet her first title shot tonight. They hug and here are Winter and Angelina. Love says that this is about competition so Velvet and Mickie should just go get a hotel room.

She finally has gotten what Winter has been trying to tell her: she’s a five time Women’s Champion and yet no one gives her the respect she deserves. This is old school Angelina here. She’ll get the title back no matter who wins tonight. Winter says she’ll win at Hardcore Justice and the title will be theirs. Night is about to fall according to the seasonal one.

Sarita and Rosita jump Tessmacher and Tara on their way to the ring. They have a tag match later.

Back and the beating is still going on. As least take the skirt off Tessmacher! Madison jumps in and it’s a big beatdown. Sarita has a face guard on which we’ll get the story on later.

We get comments from all four people in the ladder match tonight. Joe says he’s the best and he’s taking the opportunity he’s been given. Morgan says he doesn’t care who’s in there with him, he’s getting the ten points. Gunner says he’s destined to be a world champion. AJ says he’ll win because he’s Bound For Glory. Daniels comes in to talk to AJ and says not in front of the camera. The camera stays anyway and AJ isn’t happy with what Daniels says, then slams the door on the camera.

We get a video “shot on a cell phone” of a brawl last week between the same chicks where Sarita got her face hurt.

Knockouts Tag Titles: Sarita/Rosita vs. Miss Tessmacher/Tara

Tara and Tessmacher wait for the champs to come through the curtain to jump them. After a beating in the aisle there’s the bell. A double team sends Tara to the floor and Tessmacher hits a double clothesline. Hey, since there are four hot chicks in the ring, let’s show the old Spanish announce team! Tessmacher gets beaten down as we start the actual match here. There’s the required USA chant as Tessmacher takes Rosita down. Just not down enough for a tag.

Everything breaks down quickly as Hebner puts Tara out. More double teaming gets two on Tessmacher. Tara comes in again and throws Tessmacher to their own corner to guarantee a hot tag. Tara cleans house with some awkward looking punches. Widow’s Peak is set up forever but doesn’t hit Sarita because Madison runs in to break it up. Sarita rolls Tara up but only gets two. Tessmacher is thrown into Sarita and actually manages a Stratusfaction bulldog. Tara hits a chokebomb and Tessmacher gets a small package for stereo pins at 4:43 to give us new champs.

Rating: C-. Not like the title mean anything but having Tessmacher and Tara hug each other a lot is never a bad thing. Does anyone ever successfully defend the tag titles anymore? Either way, this was a bit better than most of their matches and it helps that Tessmacher has an actual finishing move now rather than the amplified Stinkface.

Bound For Glory Series: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Matt Morgan vs. Gunner

This is a ladder match and good for ten points. Gunner and AJ start on the floor. Morgan is in all white and here comes the ladder. Joe hits a baseball slide to take out Gunner and AJ. Now Morgan and Joe are fighting over the ladder so Gunner takes it in the face instead. AJ gets up to a huge pop and slams the ladder into I think Morgan’s hand. Morgan grabs a chokeslam but AJ backflips out of it.

Pele puts Morgan down in the corner but Gunner gets back in with a slingshot suplex to Styles. AJ sends him to the floor as the ladder hasn’t been unfolded yet. Morgan in control again and he throws AJ into the ladder. AJ walks up the ladder but jumps into a fallaway slam. Joe hits a senton backsplash and sets up the ladder. Gunner is back in to break it up though as the pacing in this is fast so far. Joe hits the ropes and dives onto Morgan.

Gunner goes up the ladder but AJ springboards onto said ladder and the slugout is on. Gunner goes down and Joe makes the save. Pele takes Joe down and AJ sets the ladder again. Gunner clears the ring again. Carbon Footprint kills Gunner dead though and Morgan wins at 5:00. Shortest ladder match ever perhaps?

Rating: B-. The length is what holds this back because the speed and pacing were great. Pretty fun little match overall but I hope it doesn’t turn into a bunch of gimmick matches added onto the Series to make it more exciting. It defeats the purpose of the gimmicks entirely, but having one every now and then is ok.

Eric Young is in some story trying to defend the TV Title. He wants to defend against C Lo Green but it’s D’Lo Brown. Brown says this is stupid and tries to leave. Young rolls him up and runs. Brown says Young better recognize.

X-Division Title: Brian Kendrick vs. Alex Shelley

They shake hands pre match. Kendrick misses a dropkick to start and Shelly rolls him up very quickly for two. Shelley keeps using weird rollup combinations which are kind of cool. They speed things up and Kendrick tries Sliced Bread #2 which they both use as their finisher. Neither can hit it so Shelley works on the ribs a bit. Surfboard goes on but it’s not the awesome lifting version.

Dive by Kendrick is blocked by a kick that might have connected but I’m not sure. Top rope cross body only gets two but he gets it three times. Only in wrestling is 2+2+2 not more than three. Shelley hammers off some forearms but Kendrick gets one of his own and a leg lariat to send Alex to the floor. The dive hits this time and Shelley is in trouble. Back in the ring a top rope splash misses and Shelley hits Sliced Bread on the apron. Both guys are down on the floor now. Shelley throws him back in but Austin Aries pops up and hits Shelley in the head with the X Title and Kendrick pins him at 5:30. Don’t think Kendrick saw it.

Rating: B-. Fun match while it lasted but again, GIVE A MATCH MORE THAN SIX MINUTES! These two were having a good match and I was getting into it but oh snap they’ve gone five whole minutes so it’s time to wrap things up! Unless your name is Sting, you’re not getting that much time and it’s getting old. Still though, fun while it lasted.

Kendrick isn’t happy with the interference by Aries.

Mexican America complains because that’s what they do. Here’s Beer Money for the staredown before Hardcore Justice. Storm says shut up and go cut his grass. Storm hypes up Roode as being awesome and says he (Storm) is a country boy (said in a bit more elaborate way). Beer Money is better and they’re going to beat the Mexicans for the people and for the Mexican legends. Storm says go mark your calendars because at the PPV, Beer Money is shutting them up. Roode says sorry about your luck to end this. Really liked this as it made me want to see them fight, which is the entire point of promos.

Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Velvet Sky

Winter and Angelina come out and jump Mickie before the match. Velvet comes out to help and it’s more like a tag match than a regular one. The nice girls beat down the evil ones but ODB and Jackie come through the crowd to beat down Mickie and Velvet. Dang it NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU. Traci Brooks of all people comes out for the save. It’s a big brawl and no match actually happens. The fans say let them fight and ODB loses a shoe somehow. ODB and Jackie beat up various men and that’s about it. Oh and cops take them away in cuffs.

Traci doesn’t like Jackie and ODB.

Bully Ray/Mr. Anderson vs. Sting/Kurt Angle

Ray cuts off Anderson’s entrance because it’s what the fans want to hear. Anderson does it anyway. We get big match intros to make sure that they don’t have enough time for a lot of wrestling here. Ray jumps Sting from behind to start and knocks him into Angle who goes to the floor. Off to Anderson who hammers away on Clown Boy. Sting plays Ricky Morton for awhile with Anderson going after his knees. Ray misses the backsplash of course and Sting brings in Kurt as Anderson is tagged also. House is cleaned and a Stinger Splash and Angle Slam end Anderson at 4:00. Well that was quick.

Rating: C-. It’s a main event tag match and in that regard it was fine, but dude, FOUR MINUTES for the main event? Is this 1997 all of a sudden? I know it’s just a quick thing to advance Sting vs. Angle and give them time together out there, but maybe they should have cut some of the other repetitive stuff from earlier so this could have had more time. Nothing to see here for the most part.

Sting asks Angle if he’s gone too far and leaves Angle in the ring to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked this one far more than I’ve liked most shows they’ve put on recently. It’s not perfect and is pretty far from it, but there’s definitely a structure there that makes this work. No Hogan and Bischoff helped this I think as they should be more of a feature attraction. There are definite holes in the show (FOUR Knockout brawls for instance) but they’re miles ahead of what they were doing a few weeks and months ago.

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Scott Steiner – Rollup

Miss Tessmacher/Tara b. Sarita/Rosita – Chokebomb to Sarita

Matt Morgan b. AJ Styles, Samoa Joe and Gunner – Morgan grabbed the contract

Brian Kendrick b. Alex Shelley – Kendrick pinned Shelly after Austin Aries hit Shelley with the belt

Kurt Angle/Sting b. Mr. Anderson/Bully Ray – Angle Slam to Anderson




The Vince Situation

What do you all think about it?

My thoughts:

As you all know, last night the WWE board of directors gave Vince a vote of no confidence, resulting in Vince being relieved of his duties to allow HHH to take over said job.  In short, this should be a very interesting story especially with the wild card aspect of Punk being out there somewhere as world champion.  I could see Punk coming back to aide a humbled Vince as a hired gun to help Vince come back into the leadership position.

As for HHH, that’s a very interesting aspect as well.  HHH as an on screen authority figure is a great touch, especially considering he can have a quick physical fight with someone if he has to.  Unlike Vince, it wouldn’t have to be a street fight every time so we could get some longer stuff.  I can live with that, especially since HHH can probably still bring it.  He’s also a very old school mind for the business, which is possibly what the company needs.  Should be very interesting indeed.

Your thoughts?




Monday Night Raw – July 18, 2011 – Why Do One Night Tournaments Suck So Hard? Oh and Vince is Fired.

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 18, 2011
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is a very different era for Raw as Punk is now world champion but has apparently left the company with the championship.  Also we have Alberto Del Rio as the Money in the Bank winner who didn’t cash in officially last night because the bell never rang.  This should be a very interesting show so let’s get to it.

Here’s Vince to open the show.  Nice to see them going straight into the big story.  Johnny Ace is with him.  Vince’s punk jacket isn’t quite as manly as something Bret would wear but most men aren’t Bret Hart.  The locker room is all watching on a monitor in the back.  The fans chant for Punk and Vince says he’ll never say that name again.  Punk is an ingrate apparently and walked out on the fans, the locker room and everyone that has ever been in this ring.

Vince says no one is bigger than the WWE and lists off a bunch of names.  There will be a new WWE Champion crowned tonight in an 8 man tournament.  Ziggler vs. Rey is one of the matches.  Swagger vs. Truth.  Kofi vs. Del Rio and Miz vs. Riley….again.  He addresses Cena not being in the match because Cena let everyone down last night.  Cena will face unmentioned consequences.  Vince promises we’ll always remember tonight so enjoy the show.

We talk about Cena tweeting that he’s been fired and if that’s hot it is, Cena is sorry to Rock.

WWE Championship Tournament Quarterfinals: The Miz vs. Alex Riley

 

Miz is limping but the fact that he’s out there is a great sign after how bad his knee looked.  Riley’s entrance and the bell are after the break.  Here we go and Riley goes after the bad knee which is rather smart.  He has psychology at least.  A kick to the knee puts Miz down and he works it over a bit.  Miz’s knee goes around the post and Riley gets two back in.  Riley’s shoulder goes into the post and here comes Miz.

Miz throws on a cravate to slow Riley down.  You have to win by pinfall or submission so there are no DQs or countouts.  Riley manages to ram Miz’s neck into his knee to take over.  Spinebuster gets two.  The inverted DDT and the Finale don’t work so Miz goes up.  He jumps into a really bad Texas Cloverleaf (called a Sharpshooter by Cole) but manages to get a rope.  Alex hammers away and Miz is staggering.  And never mind as Riley walks into the Skull Crushing Finale for the clean pin at 4:57.

Rating: C. Nice to see Miz get a clean win over Riley as he was starting to look far too weak.  A deep run in this tournament could help him a lot as this win did.  Pretty average match here but for a TV match in a tournament that needs to have relatively quick matches, this was perfectly fine.

Video on John Morrison who is coming back soon from his neck injury apparently.

WWE Championship Tournament Quarter-Finals: R-Truth vs. Jack Swagger

 

Swagger grabs a headlock to start us off.  Truth keeps talking to himself as they circle each other a bit more.  Apparently Big Show will be out for two months.  Truth gets a victory roll for two as Truth does his weird pelvic thrust dance.  Belly to belly gets two for Swagger.  Swagger beats on Truth a bit more before the Vader Bomb gets two.  Double chickenwing goes on Truth as the crowd doesn’t care.  Truth starts his comeback but misses the Axe kick.  It’s countered into the ankle lock but Truth counters into a rollup for the pin at 4:20.

Rating: C-. This was a weird one as the heel vs. heel dynamic was kind of all over the place.  Truth was moving around fast like a face would do but since both are heels it’s kind of hard to call.  Either way it wasn’t anything all that special but with just over four minutes and no feud to work off of, how good can you really get?

WWE Championship Tournament Quarter-Finals: Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston

 

Alberto is VERY fired up about being Mr. Money in the Bank.  He talks about trying to cash in last night but Punk ran away.  Alberto has a surprise and RICARDO IS BACK!  Why this is exciting is beyond me but you have to shout at a return!!!  The bell rings after a break and Del Rio gets a fast seated dropkick to the back of the head for two.  Alberto goes after the leg of Kofi which is a change of pace for him.

Kofi starts his jumping around and hits a back elbow to take Del Rio down.  Rock apparently has begged Vince not to fire Cena.  This match seems kind of rushed.  Del Rio is sent to the floor and Kofi hits a sweet dive to take Alberto down.  Kofi takes too long to come back in and gets caught by an enziguri for two.  Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last long at all.  Another kick gets two.

Elbow drop gets the same and we’re back to the chinlock.  Kofi starts his comeback and the crowd finally reacts.  Boom Drop is avoided though and Del Rio gets a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two.  Cross armbreaker is countered into a rollup for the pin out of nowhere at approximately 5:00.

Rating: C. Rather surprised by the pin here but Alberto losing makes things more interesting as far as surprise winners could go.  I didn’t like the match itself for the most part as it seemed kind of rushed but the ending helped it a bit.  Nice to see Kofi get an actual big win for once too.

Summerslam Recall is from 1992 where Bulldog beat Bret.

Kofi says he’s excited and tonight is a new opportunity.  That’s one down and two to go.

WWE Championship Tournament Quarter-Finals: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

 

Ziggler trabs him to start but Rey speeds things up to escape.  Rey is tossed to the floor and takes a nice flapjack to put him down again.  In the ring that gets two as does a big elbow drop.  Off to a stump puller which is an old school submission.  Dolph takes him down to the mat and has been in control for most of the match.  Splash in the corner misses though and Rey gets a quick two count.

Seated senton off the top hits but Ziggler gets a sunset flip.  They exchange some kicks, resulting in Dolph getting a two count.  Clothesline misses for Dolph and the sleeper is countered.  Rey counters into a 619 attempt but Dolph ducks and hits a reverse slam for two.  619 hits on the second attempt and a top rope splash pins the US Champion clean at 5:00.

Rating: C. Not bad again here but at the same time it was kind of boring again.  These five minute matches can only be so good because they have to fly through everything instead of letting a match build itself up.  That gets really annoying quickly and it certainly has in these four matches so far.  Still though not bad.

Jerry calls Punk the former champion.

Updated brackets:

Mysterio vs. R-Truth

Kofi vs. Miz

Vince is talking to Johnny Ace about the tournament.

Face Diva Team vs. Heel Diva Team

 

Like I’m listing off 12-14 Divas for a two minute match.  Beth vs. Rosa to start and they botch something badly.  Slingshot suplex hits and everything breaks down within about 15 seconds.  Glam Slam and we’re done at 1:02.  About as good as I was expecting.  Anything with Kelly in those tiny white shorts is never a bad thing though.

WWE Championship Tournament Semi-Finals: Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

 

Kofi immediately goes for the knee and Miz is having to fight through the issues.  Kofi does his reversal off the ropes with his hair.  They horribly botch a dropkick as Miz falls before it even hits.  Double stomp gets two for Kofi but he gets crotched soon after that.  Slingshot elbow gets two for Kofi but Miz rolls through a top rope cross body.  He hits more or less a Stunner to the knee and loads up Trouble in Paradise, only for Miz to head to the apron to escape.  Miz gets put into a rollup for two but gets a modified Snake Eyes and hits the Finale to end it at 3:45.  Miz is bleeding from the mouth a bit.

Rating: D+. Didn’t feel this one at all.  The quick endings are crippling this thing but having seven matches in two hours and all with clean endings is probably asking too much.  Not a horrible match I guess but at the same time this was way too rushed as they were trying to get too much in there.  As with almost all these matches, they would be better with more time.

Truth says he should be champion and there’s a conspiracy.  The Little Jimmys better close their eyes because the title is gonna get got.

Video on Andy from Tough Enough who grew up in a very bad neighborhood apparently, complete with a meth lab.

WWE Championship Tournament Semi-Finals: Rey Mysterio vs. R-Truth

 

Truth takes over to start and pounds Rey down, hitting a suplex for two.  They collide which of course goes badly for Rey, resulting in another two count.  Off to a front facelock by Truth and a knee to Rey’s ribs stops him again.  After a body scissors Rey gets some momentum, including a bad looking arm drag to put Truth on the floor.  Rey hits a suicide dive and we take a break.

Back with Truth holding a chinlock.  Apparently Rey tried two top rope moves during the break and was ½ with them.  Truth gets an extra spinny forearm for two.  619 attempt is countered by a forearm for two.  Back to the front facelock as it seems like both of them are spent.  Truth charges at Rey in the corner but goes into the middle buckle instead.  Rey still can’t keep any momentum going and Truth hits his suplex into the stunner for two.  Rey goes to the apron and hits a headscissors to set up the 619.  Top rope splash puts him into the finals at 12:48.

Rating: D+. Not a horrible match but there was WAY too much laying around.  This show is just draining and it’s the same problem as there always is in one night tournaments: the uniqueness of seeing each person goes away quickly because we’re going to see the finalists three times in one night which is just way too much.  Not bad but rather dull at times.

Rey stays in the ring for the main event which is next.

 

And before the bell here’s Vince in that pink jacket again.  Miz isn’t even out there yet.  Vince sounds like he calls it the WWF Title.  I’m pretty sure he did.  He has to hurry though because there’s something else he needs to do.  No title match?  Apparently not as Vince says this is bigger than Rey.  Sadly enough he doesn’t make the required joke.  Yep the match is postponed so no match here.

Vince reiterates that no one is bigger than the WWE, including John Cena.  There’s a CM Punk chant.  Vince talks about how this isn’t about his ego and how he did what was right from a business perspective.  This was a long term decision and in time, the fans will thank him.  Let’s get this over with apparently and here’s Cena.

Cena says he isn’t going to go through some big rant or tirade and he knows what’s coming.  He isn’t going to go through what Shawn Michaels went through.  Apparently this is about Montreal somehow and how Shawn had to go through the constant reminders of how he screwed Bret.  Cena doesn’t want to be remembered as the guy that screwed CM Punk.

Last night was about Vince wanting to keep his bubble intact because no one can embarrass Vince.  Vince needed a patsy but Cena wasn’t going to play ball that way.  Cena tells Punk that was a great match.  He wasn’t going to take the title that way because it would have made it look meaningless.  That’s true to an extent.  Cena says Vince now has about 8 months to find a new opponent for Rock.  Somehow he’s sure Vince can pull it off though so it doesn’t really matter.

Cena says that we should just get to it.  He says if Vince has to fire him here tonight, he’ll keep doing it on someone else’s TV show….Brother.  Hokey smoke we just got an actual Impact reference.  Cena starts to walk but Vince stops him.  And…….it’s time to play the game?  Here’s HHH of all people in a suit.  Vince is all happy to see him but HHH isn’t thrilled.

There was a board of directors meeting this morning and he says that twice for some reason.  The board is concerned about the current situation.  HHH wants to take this to the back so it doesn’t have to be in person.  The board however is about Vince.  It’s true that Vince built all this, but at the same time they’re worried about Vince’s “extremely questionable decisions” as of late.

HHH again offers to take this to the back but Vince says do it here.  The board has asked HHH to come here to tell Vince that there’s an injunction against him with a vote of no confidence.  Vince laughs it off but apparently the family agrees.  On top of that, the board has appointed someone to take over the day to day operations.  That would be……HHH apparently.  Cena IS NOT fired and HHH is about to cry.  Vince is officially relieved of his duties (HUGE pop for that) and HHH breaks down.  He loves “pop” and he’s sorry.  Vince stands in the middle of the ring and HHH walks out.  A thank you Vince chant ends this.

Overall Rating: C+. What a difference 15 minutes makes.  I had this all ready to go with a bad grade and then they spring this Vince is fired thing on me.  HHH as the new Mr. McMahon could work incredibly well as he’s someone we’re familiar with and he could even jump in the ring once in awhile.  I liked the ending a lot and I’m very interested in where this could go.  The first two hours were pretty awful but the ending is awesome stuff indeed.  Good ending to an otherwise bad show.

Results

The Miz b. Alex Riley – Skull Crushing Finale

R-Truth b. Jack Swagger – Rollup

Kofi Kingston b. Alberto Del Rio – Rollup

Rey Mysterio b. Dolph Ziggler – Top Rope Splash

Kelly Kelly/AJ/Kaitlyn/Gail Kim/Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres/Natalya b. Rosa Mendes/Tamina/Bella Twins/Maryse/Alicia Fox

The Miz b. Kofi Kingston – Skull Crushing Finale

Rey Mysterio b. R-Truth – Top Rope Splash




Money in the Bank 2011 – MITB Is…Well Money I guess

Money in the Bank 2011
Date: July 17, 2011
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Jerry Lawler

It’s Money in the Bank and I’m rather clueless as to who is going to win three of the four main matches.  The MITB matches themselves are total tossups and the Punk vs. Cena match could go a bunch of ways.  It’ll definitely be interesting and will set the stage for at least the next few months worth of shows, if nothing else due to the MITB cases, assuming one isn’t cashed in tonight.  Let’s get to it.

Opening video is of course mainly about Punk vs. Cena, which to be fair is by far and away the biggest match on the card.

Sin Cara vs. Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater vs. Sheamus vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Wade Barrett vs. Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

 

This is going to be a big insane match so it’s almost impossible to call what’s going on in these things.  I’m really not sure who to predict in this.  I went with Cody as a more or less random choice mainly out of a lack of anyone else.  Big mess to start as these really should only have six people in them.  Kane, Barrett and Sheamus clear the ring out and it’s a three way staredown.

The Europeans….wait Kane is from Spain.  Ok the two guys not named Kane go down and it’s ladder time already.  Bryan dropkicks Kane down as Slater and Gabriel team up a bit.  Cara, who is in white/gray here, gets taken down but the former tag partners fight already.  Slater goes for the ladder and is loudly booed.  Gabriel goes up but the ladder is way off center.  Bryan dropkicks him off but Cody goes up.

Kane sends Sheamus and Cody to the floor but Barrett stops the Big Bald.  Kane throws a ladder at Sheamus to take him down.  Slater vs. Kane and guess who wins that one.  Cara pops up out of nowhere to drill Kane and break up the clothesline.  Bryan hits a big dive and Gabriel does the same.  Sorry for all the play by play stuff but it’s all you can do in these things for the most part.

Cara is like screw you guys I’m the flier here and takes out Sheamus with a huge one.  He follows that up by kicking Bryan in the head and hitting the top rope C4 to take Bryan down.  Sin tries to go for the briefcase but can’t pick a ladder up and into the ring.  Barrett kicks his head off so it doesn’t matter.  They do the whole set up a ladder as a bridge from the ring to the table thing as is customary.

Cara avoids going through it though and Barrett clotheslines the post.  For some reason the masked guy goes in again without a ladder and gets his head kicked off by Sheamus.  Not a good night for the Mexican dude.  Cara gets powerbombed through the ladder to more or less kill him.  BIG pop for Sheamus for that one.  Sheamus is controlling almost everyone here as Cara is taken out on a stretcher.

Kane and Sheamus are in the ring and fighting over a ladder.  Scratch that as all three go to the floor.  Bryan, Kane and Cody are all in the ring with ladders now.  The small guys work together to take Kane down and there goes that partnership.  Cara is gone now, as in out of the entire arena via a stretcher.  Kane has the big ladder set up in the ring and everyone comes in.  Cody makes an attempt but all the small guys make a save.

The former Nexus triple teams Bryan and then the tag team tells Barrett to go ahead.  Barrett proves why British wrestlers are stupid as he goes up and is pulled down just a few seconds later.  Both of them go up but Rhodes shoves the ladder down.  Cross Rhodes takes someone down and it’s time for Barrett and Rhodes to fight over the ladder.  Cross Rhodes takes Barrett out but Sheamus makes the last second save.

There’s an Irish Curse and pasty goes up, only for Bryan to make the save.  Bryan rams him into the ladder a few times and goes up at the same time.  Sheamus and Kane combine for a Doomsday Device to END Bryan.  Kane and Sheamus are alone in the ring now.  Well other than a ladder but that doesn’t count I don’t think.  The big ladder is in the ring and a regular one is set up as a bridge against the middle buckle.

Kane escapes though and chokeslams various small people.  Big Bald goes up but Bryan makes ANOTHER save despite being legally deceased I believe.  Bryan goes up and almost gets the LeBell Lock on the ladder.  That would be awesome.  Bryan manages to knock Kane to the floor but Slater stops him.  Bryan saves AGAIN as he’s been insane so far tonight.

Slater goes up one more time but Barrett saves.  Time for Barrett vs. Sheamus which doesn’t sound all that appealing.  Thankfully they team up and stop Slater, using a ladder like a fork to stop Slater and shove him off the top.  That was cool.  Sheamus goes nuts and takes out a lot of people so he can climb.  Naturally he’s not that smart so he sets up another ladder on the top rope.

Sheamus is just beating people up at the moment and not really trying to go after it.  Even Booker is saying GO FOR IT.  Ok now he’s going up but Kane pops up from nowhere to stop him.  Sheamus has a bridge ladder beneath him.  He goes onto it but doesn’t break it.  FREAKING OW MAN!  Wasteland hits Kane and Gabriel climbs a ladder and hits 450 in the tightest space possible.  That was AWESOME.

Bryan and Cody go at it on the ladder as everyone but Barrett is down.  Wade comes up as Bryan tries to choke Cody out because he’s an idiot.  Cody goes down and Wade takes an elbow to knock him backwards a bit.  Bryan is alone up there and Wade is on the bridge.  Bryan kicks him down and WINS THE CASE!  Totally didn’t see that one coming.

Rating: A. I liked the storytelling aspect of this as Bryan was the MVP of this thing.  He made a ton of saves and certainly deserved to win it in the end.  The spots in this were great and Cara going out might have been due to prevent him from botching something major, which says a lot.  I’m not sure I can see Bryan winning a title but stranger things have happened.  GREAT match though.

Vince is here.  Hokey smoke that’s Johnny Ace with him.

Apparently Punk hasn’t signed yet but is in a meeting for a last second negotiation.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Brie Bella

 

Booker says he never dressed like his brother in Harlem Heat.  Is his memory failing or something?  No idea what you want me to say here.  They’re both hot, they’re both inept, the match is slightly longer than a regular match they have on Raw.  Kelly is champion in case you’re reading this like three years from now.  It’s a totally boring match and it’s a total food break for the crowd.  Oh and Eve is with Kelly at ringside here.  Crowd is dead here.  K2 ends this at like four minutes.  Total filler and it knows it.

 

Rating: D. What do you want me to say here?  This match was nothing but the girls looked good so I can’t call it a failure.  The division is horrible since Kharma got pregnant and Laycool went down at the same time.  Not a horrible match but just an extended Raw thing really.  It served its purpose though I guess.

 

Summerslam ad.  It’s in the summer you know.  Eh Divas in bikinis is never a bad thing.

We recap Henry vs. Show.  They’re both big, they’re both strong, they both hurt people.  Yeah that’s about it.

Mark Henry vs. Big Show

 

Henry is in blue here.  They slug it out to start and Show JUMPS at him with a shoulder block to take Mark down.  Out to the floor early and Show loads up a chokeslam through the table but Henry breaks it up.  Show shoves him over the steps and the bald one is in control.  Scratch that as Henry sends him into the steps and Show goes back in.  Henry goes for the knee with a chop block and Show is in trouble.

Boot to the head gets two.  Half crab goes on which makes sense for once.  Henry?  Psychology?  What’s in this lemonade I’m drinking?  Show grabs a rope and manages to kick Henry off which looked rather cool.  Splash/running clothesline hits Show in the corner and Henry is all angry and such.  Show GOES UP and hits a shoulder block off the middle rope but he hurts his knee again.

Both guys are down now and the count gets like three.  Show loads up the chokeslam but Henry kicks him in the knee to break it up.  World’s Strongest Slam but it only gets two.  Dang I would have thought that was the ending.  Another World’s Strongest Slam and a pair of splashes and Show is finally done.

Rating: C+. Call me crazy but I liked it.  They were going at it out there and more importantly than anything else, it was short.  That’s a very key thing to this match and it made things work a lot better overall.  Henry’s push probably won’t go anywhere (at least I hope not) but a win like this is perfectly fine.

Post match Henry Pillmanizes Show’s leg with a Vader Bomb.  Show goes out on a stretcher saying it’s broken to fill in some time.

Vince is saying this is a nightmare as Josh comes in to ask if Punk has re-signed.  He hasn’t apparently but Vince offered him a huge contract.  Vince talks for a bit and ultimately says if Punk leaves with the title, may God have mercy on Cena’s soul.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne vs. R-Truth vs. Alex Riley vs. The Miz vs. Rey Mysterio

 

Everyone grabs a mini ladder as they come into the ring.  Rey comes out last and gets almost ZERO reaction.  Everyone has a ladder and they surround Del Rio, beating him down rather easily.  Booker picks Evan Bourne which Lawler is surprised at.  Some of the guys are out of the ring now and Swagger is thrown out for the second time.  Truth and Miz have a stand off and duel a bit.

Swagger takes them both out because that’s just smart.  He sets up a ladder but Kofi and Bourne run in at the same time for an attempt to go up.  Now they team up and take out some heels.  Rey gets a rana to take Swagger to the floor again and Truth takes Kofi out.  Riley crotches him on a ladder and is the only one standing.  Miz comes in for the save but all the ladders are too short anyway so it’s not like it matters.

Riley dives over the top and takes out Swagger and Miz in a nice spot.  Truth dives over to take out all three of them.  Kofi and Rey do a double dive to take all of them out.  Bourne goes up and everyone gasps.  SHOOTING STAR PRESS ONTO ALL FIVE GUYS!!!  Bourne goes up a big ladder but Miz makes the save.  Bourne gets a hand on it but so does Miz.  Del Rio pops up and shoves it down as Miz may have hurt his knee.

He landed on it coming down and may have jammed it.  I think it’s worked but it doesn’t look right AT ALL.  This might be legit actually.  Miz is carried out but can’t seem to put any weight on the knee.  I think he might be actually hurt if the visual is any sign of it.  Truth and Del Rio are both climbed over (literally) by Rey and Bourne.  The faces hit stereo ranas to take out the heels.  That looked SWEET.

Swagger is all alone but Kofi is like screw that and jumps over him onto the ladder.  Swagger puts an ankle lock on him instead and Riley tries to steal the case but fails.  Rey vs. Truth at the moment with Rey taking a ladder to the ribs.  He climbs onto a ladder but falls onto it face first.  Kofi goes up and uses a ladder as a step down for a Boom Drop onto Truth.  Booker of course criticizes him for dancing too much.

This match is a lot more choreographed and you can tell it a lot.  Truth messes up a see-saw spot to Swagger.  Good thing Swagger was nice enough to sit there and let Truth do it again.  Rey and Riley slug it out on the ladder but Bourne and Del Rio get ladders of their own.  Down goes Alberto and Rey has his hand on it.  All seven guys are on ladders in what looks like a clothed orgy, which kind of defeats the purpose but you get the idea.

Down goes Del Rio and there goes Jack too.  Bourne is tossed but the other four are all there still.  Truth goes down and Kofi gets a swinging kick to knock Rey off.  He’s all alone but Swagger makes a last second stop.  They both fall and it looked VERY bad as Kofi’s knee landed on Swagger’s throat.  HERE’S MIZ!  He literally hops down the aisle on one leg but Rey stops (to huge booing).

Rey and Del Rio fight a bit but down goes Del Rio.  Never mind as he’s coming back up again.  Briefcase to Alberto’s head but Rey still can’t get it.  REY’S MASK IS OFF!  Everything falls down and Rey has to cover his face.  Alberto goes up as Rey is all terrified.  Alberto is all alone and it’s over.  Didn’t see that one coming.

Rating: B. Good, but nowhere near as good as the SD one.  The spots here were awesome to say the least but the sloppiness hurt it a good bit.  Miz coming back in was great and an awesome false finish.  Rey losing his mask was rather surprising and I’m seriously wondering how badly hurt Swagger is because that didn’t look like a planned fall at all.  Messy but fun, which is about par for the course in MITB to be honest.

You get a relatively clear shot of Rey’s face during the highlight package.

 

We recap Christian vs. Orton, which is more or less Christian can’t beat Orton and turned heel because his initial title loss to him was unfair.  If Orton gets disqualified or if there’s a “bad decision”, Orton loses the title.

Del Rio says he shouldn’t have had to win but this is his destiny.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

 

After some big match intros we’re ready to go.  Christian shows off some nice psychology as he throws a chair in immediately and tries to get Orton to snap.  The chair goes to the floor and Orton takes over with relative ease.  The crowd is totally behind Christian here.  Out to the floor with Orton in control but Christian takes over back inside.  These two have had some very good matches so this should be awesome.

They slug it out a bit with Christian mostly in control.  Orton grabs a rollup for two.  Killswitch doesn’t work and they clothesline each other to the floor.  Back in and Christian jumps over him and blocks an RKO.  Jackknife cover gets two for Randy.  There’s the Thesz Press as the fans aren’t pleased.  Elevated DDT doesn’t work but Christian tries his spinning dive out of the corner, only to jump into a dropkick to the ribs.

Christian takes over again as he’s done a lot in this match.  Top rope headbutt gets two.  Killswitch hits out of almost nowhere but Orton gets out at 2.999.  Even the crowd is into this now.  Christian loads up a spear but he hits the post instead.  Orton puts Christian in that over the shoulder backbreaker into the neckbreaker (LOVE that move) for two.  He sets for the Punt but Christian moves.  Randy settles for the powerslam instead.

There’s the elevated DDT and Christian is in trouble.  Christian spits in Orton’s face to tick him off and Orton goes off on him.  He breaks at three though so it’s not a DQ.  Orton kicks Christian low…and it’s a DQ!  CHRISTIAN WINS THE TITLE!!!  THAT STIPULATION ACTUALLY WORKED!!!

 

Rating: B-. Good match here but not as good as their usual stuff.  I can’t believe that ending actually worked either as I’ve never seen anything like it before.  Granted it’s probably so Bryan can come out and cash in but that is what it is.  Either way this was fine and they continue to have great matches together.

Orton destroys Christian post match, hitting a bunch of RKOs on the table while Teddy tries to calm him down.

Ok if Bryan doesn’t come down now, he’s an idiot.  Apparently he’s an idiot because he’s not here.

We recap Punk vs. Cena.  If you don’t know this, you’re an idiot.  Basically, Punk went on a massive rant against WWE and Cena in a worked shoot.  This is his last night with the company and Vince is involved too.  If Punk leaves with the title, Cena is fired.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

 

And here we go.  Punk has an epic reaction as he’s the hometown boy.  He even has a new shirt.  The crowd is rabid for Punk.  He sits in the ring and is a total face in the eyes of the crowd.  HUGE CM Punk chant goes up as we wait on Cena.  I seriously worry for Cena’s safety if he wins.  OH MAN that heat is ONS levels.  Punk goes out to be near the crowd for Cena’s entrance.  Total stoic Cena here as everything he does is booed out of the building.

They do big match intros and Punk is as over as free beer.  Here we go.  I’m so fired up for this it’s unreal.  TON of time for this too.  Punk grabs a headlock and the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants start up.  We actually do some chain wrestling and Cena is booed out of the building for a snap mare.  They do some obvious spot calling while Cena has a headlock.  Punk tries to fire off a spin kick but Cena ducks.

YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants start up and Punk points at himself and asks the fans if they mean him.  Punk almost gets an Anaconda Vice but Cena reverses into an armbar.  They’re working slow here but that’s perfectly fine given that they have over 45 minutes if need be.  Jerry tries to make Punk out to be the heel here and it’s just failing completely.  There’s the duel and it’s all CENA SUCKS rather quickly.

Even Cole is against Punk here.  Headlock goes on again as Cena has mostly controlled here, but we’re only like 5 minutes in.  Hip toss by Punk sets up a dropkick and Punk speeds things up a bit.  There’s a headlock of his own and Cena is down.  We reference Montreal because that’s just what we do here in WWE.  Punk does You Can’t See Me to Cena and they both try their finishers but it’s a stalemate.

HUGE CM Punk chant goes up which is par for the course tonight.  Punk goes for the knee and takes over again.  Cena fires back with the bulldog for two.  Off to a front facelock and Punk shakes his finger no.  I’ve never seen as many spots called in a single match.  Cena hits a clothesline and Punk might have lost a tooth.  Off to an arm trap chinlock which is close to a Crossface with Cena on his back.

Punk gets up and suplexes his way out of it for two.  Cena does a Bret Hart chest to the buckle bump which gets two.  All Punk at this point.  Cena gets something going and hits a release fisherman’s suplex for two.  AA is reversed again and Punk gets a quick DDT for two.  Triangle choke goes on Cena and we slow it down again.  It seems like they’re saving energy.  They’ve been at it nearly ten minutes and it’s 10:22 so that’s a very likely scenario.

Cena counters out of it but Punk throws him to the floor.  Punk teases going up but just climbs out instead.  The fans applaud Punk just for picking Cena up.  The fans chant for Colt Cabana and there’s a knee to the back of the neck of Cena while he’s hanging off the apron.  That gets two back in the ring.  Punk charges at Cena but his arm hits the post to buy Cena a few seconds.

And never mind as Punk hits a clothesline for two.  Back to the chinlock as this needs to go a long time since the rest holds are getting a bit boring.  There are actually some Cena chants and Punk comes off the middle rope with a spinning cross body.  Cena might have hurt his knee as he’s going to the apron a bit.  Punk goes after him but can’t suplex him back in.  Cena manages to suplex him to the floor and the fans clap for a bit.

I think the knee was a work as he’s not even holding it at the moment.  Oh wait yes he is.  That was more or less an FU off the apron.  Back in the ring that gets two as he’s rubbing the knee now.  He can stand on it and hits another release fisherman’s.  Elbow drop gets two.  Cena sets for what looks like a powerslam but flips Punk forward into a sitout slam for two.

It’s only 10:30 and they’ve been going at it over 15 minutes.  The knee looks fine.  It’s boo/yay time and the yays are winning it.  We go WAY old school with an abdominal stretch.  HE EVEN HOOKS THE LEG PROPERLY!  Punk hip tosses out of it and it’s a double clothesline to put them both down.  Cena up first and he initiates the ending sequence.  The Protobomb is reversed though and Punk gets the loudest reaction for a rollup you’ll ever here.

Protobomb hits this time but You Can’t See Me results in a kick to the head.  Suicide dive takes Cena down and the fans erupt again.  Punk high fives a fan while he’s still on the ground in a cool moment.  Punk misses a cross body and now he Can’t See Cena.  Five Knuckle Shuffle hits at about 20 minutes.  AA is countered and Punk uses his martial arts for two.

Punk is looking towards the entrance and smiles for no apparent reason.  GTS is loaded up but Cena counters into a gutwrench suplex for two.  Punk fights back with some knees to the jaw and a bulldog.  Springboard clothesline gets two and the fans are still totally into this.  The replay shows how sweet those knees were.  Out of nowhere Cena grabs the STF and Punk is in trouble!  Oh of course he makes the rope but it takes awhile for him to get there.

As Cena goes for Punk again he gets caught in the side of the head with a big old kick for two.  Cena rolls through a cross body but the AA is countered into the GTS but Cena grabs the leg and the STF is back on again!  Punk can’t make the ropes but Cena pulls him back to the middle again.  Cole says it’s a matter of time and he’s right.  It’ll just be multiple more minutes because Punk manages to counter from the mat into the Anaconda Vice.  SWEET!

Cena gets back up there’s the AA for TWO.  This is getting awesome as they used the slow build.  I’m glued to my screen which hasn’t happened since a few years ago with Taker vs. Shawn.  Top rope legdrop is countered via something like a powerbomb for two.  Punk almost Hulks Up and says it’s time to Go To Sleep.  He loads it up but Cena grabs the rope and clotheslines him on it.

The top rope legdrop hits this time but it only gets two.  These kickouts are incredible.  They’re not going to end the match but they’ve built it up so well and the audience being so into them is making up the difference.  Cena is getting his 19th wind and looks like he wants the AA.  It hits clean again and PUNK KICKS OUT.  Cena tries an AA off the middle rope but Punk fights out of it.

He manages to get a top rope hurricanrana but Cena goes to the corner to escape.  Corner knee sets up the GTS and Cole is scared to death.  The knee only hits the ribs and Cena manages to fall out of the ring instead of being in pinning position.  And here’s Vince with Johnny Ace.  The distraction lets Cena get the STF and Vince sends Johnny Ace to ring the bell.  Cena hits the floor and blasts Ace, saying he doesn’t want it that way.  Vince and Cena have a staredown in the aisle and Cena says it’s my way.  He charges back into the ring and there’s the GTS and PUNK WINS!

Rating: A+. Excellent match as I’m sure you got here as the whole thing came off as completely epic.  Cena almost had to lose here due to the sake of his own safety.  Vince screwing himself over is a great thing because that’s how it had to be.  Great stuff here and the show ending with Punk being as popular as anyone imaginable is excellent.  Awesome stuff here and an awesome show.

Vince jumps on commentary and says to kill the music.  He wants Alberto out here NOW to cash in.  Alberto runs out and Punk kicks him in the head almost immediately to take him down.  Punk goes into the crowd and that’s probably the safest place in the world for him.  The bell didn’t ring and Del Rio never cashed in officially.

Overall Rating: A. Well that was incredible.  From top to bottom this was great stuff and nothing was bad on it at all.  Even the Divas had looks going for them so you can’t complain there.  Great stuff overall and a shocking ending, which was exactly what this needed.  Zero complaints and it more than lived up to the hype.  Can’t wait for tomorrow now, which is the whole point of the show.  Loved it.

 

Results

Daniel Bryan won the Smackdown Money in the Bank Briefcase

Kelly Kelly b. Brie Bella – K2

Mark Henry b. Big Show – Splash

Alberto Del Rio won the Raw Money in the Bank Briefcase

Christian b. Randy Orton via DQ – Orton kicks Christian low

CM Punk b. John Cena – GTS




MITB Predictions

I’ll get used to putting these up eventually.

Anyway we have four major matches tomorrow night:

Raw MITB

SD MITB

Christian vs. Orton

Punk vs. Cena

Your thoughts?

As for mine:

I’m going to go with Cena retaining by pin, Rey as a total in the dark pick, Orton to retain and I guess Cody to win MITB.  I have very little confidence there though so that is what it is.

Thoughts?




Smackdown – July 15, 2011 – More Solid Stuff, As Always

Smackdown
Date: July 15, 2011
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

It’s the final show before Money in the Bank and everything is pretty much set in stone at this point.  The MITB match itself is a pretty open field but I’d look for Sheamus, Barrett or Rhodes to win it (what a limb I’m going out on with those picks).  Probably just some last minute pushes for the show here as expected.  Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy?  Mine is a bad internet connection.  And popcorn costing $7 at a theater.

Orton vs. Kane tonight.

DiBiase gets a shot at Jackson too.

Josh is in the ring and brings out the dude that hears voices in his head.  Orton says he won’t get disqualified and that he thinks this is a cheap attempt by Christian to try to steal the title.  Christian pops up on screen and says that clause was his lawyers’ idea.  He has a gift for Orton which is a portrait of Christian standing over Orton with the title.  Orton says that isn’t going to work to make him mad.

Christian starts talking about Orton’s family, namely Bob Orton Jr., who was only a glorified sidekick.  His dad is in the Hall of Fame in the wing with guys like Drew Carey and the other cheap jokes.  He’s in the HOF to keep Randy happy.  Orton says come say that to his face, which Christian says he’ll do once he wins the title on Sunday.  He calls Orton pathetic and Orton calls Christian a pathetic excuse for a man and a superstar.  After Sunday, Christian will be exposed as a flash in the pan that needed Edge to help him win the title for five days.  Simple segment but the emotion was there.

Video on Show vs. Henry which I think is the same one from Raw.  They face off tonight.  Not a match, just a face off.

Intercontinental Title: Ezekiel Jackson vs. Ted DiBiase

 

New ring announcer tonight who looks a bit better in a blue dress than Chimmel does.  DiBiase hits Jackson and that doesn’t go well for him.  Out to the floor as Booker rambles about his Fave Five as is his custom.  Jackson is rammed into the post which gets two in the ring.  Cody is watching and the referee, the former Nunzio, is really loud here.

DiBiase takes over and throws on a chinlock.  The following clothesline is countered by Jackson.  How has no one else ever countered that?  Apparently Ted has blown all of his money and it’s implied that it was on Maryse.  Here come the slams but DiBiase counters into a Dream Street attempt but Jackson shrugs it off and slams Ted again.  Rack doesn’t work but the second attempt does with the submission coming at 3:45.

Rating: C. See, this is what Jackson needs more of: wins where he gets in some trouble but eventually uses the power game to make his comeback and set up his finishing stuff.  Nothing fancy here and it worked just fine.  Also helps when he actually, you know, wins his matches instead of losing them.

Most of the MITB people are in matches later.

Ted is in the back and Cody says he’ll bag him if Ted loses again.

Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes

 

We get a quick recap video of this feud during the introductions.  It’s almost shot like its from the mind of a crazy person so it looks really cool.  Ok make that a long one.  Bryan hammers him into the corner to start us off and he escapes an Alabama Slam attempt.  LeBell Lock doesn’t work and Cole puts a bag on and imitates Booker.  Ok that was kind of funny.

Rhodes takes over for a bit but Bryan sends him to the floor and takes over with a dive.  We take a break and come back in the ring with Cody in control.  Cody throws on a half crab which doesn’t last long.  Like you can put a submission on Bryan.  Cody works over the ribs as the fans keep coming in and out of this one.  Booker gets asked about being in a MITB match and somehow he starts talking about Daniel Bryan.  Apparently it’s too brutal to talk about.  I give up.

Anyway it’s back to the half crab as the announcers totally ignore the match other than Josh when he can get a word in edgewise.  Bryan fires back with some forearms and a leg lariat/running kick for two.  Some light Cody chants start up.  Not we’re talking about Booker being a drum major.  Alabama Slam gets two and the commentary is really starting to get old.  Talk about MITB or ANYTHING of importance, but drop the bickering.

Cody tries Cross Rhodes but Bryan climbs the ropes to get behind Cody.  Bryan gets put on the top but kicks Cody away and manages to grab the LeBell Lock while on the ropes.  That gets broken up of course so Bryan settles for the missile dropkick for a long two.  Running dropkick in the corner puts Cody down again.  They both go up and Bryan gets crotched badly.  That positioning allows the Beautiful Disaster to end this at 7:29 shown of 10:59.

Rating: B. I liked this one a lot actually.  Cody can be really good when he gets some time and Bryan of course is capable of having a good match with anyone.  This has been a pretty solid mini feud and I’d like to see it get a title involved.  Good stuff here and a rather fun TV match indeed.

Teddy is on the phone talking about getting protection or something.  A referee comes in and Teddy tells him that if there’s any physicality in the Big Show/Mark Henry showdown, their PPV match is off.  The referee leaves and Teddy talks about gambling a lot.  This seems to be a running theme with him.  Kane comes in to thank Teddy for giving him a match with Orton as he requested.  Kane isn’t happy because he’s starting to feel human instead of like a monster.  Teddy says if it makes him feel any better, he’s scaring Teddy right now.  Kane says if Teddy was really scared, Teddy wouldn’t be able to tell him.

Jinder and Khali are in a photo shoot and Jinder isn’t happy with the photographer paying attention to Khali.  They both yell at him and that’s about it.

Christian is looking at Orton’s bus and there’s spray paint on the side talking about Christian being the uncrowned champion.  He says he’ll find out who did this.

Sheamus vs. Sin Cara

 

This should be interesting.  Wade Barrett is on commentary here.  The match starts after a break.  Cara takes over to start with his high flying stuff.  Barrett admits that the Corre was a disaster.  Sheamus can’t get anything going as Cara gets an armdrag out of the corner.  And let’s talk about the Fave Five because it’s been a full 4 minutes since we did.  Apparently Booker sees some of himself in Sheamus.  Uh….ok?

We talk about the drum major stuff as it’s kind of interesting to see how long they can go without actually talking about the match.  Barrett is talking about how he’s going to win as Sheamus gets a running knee lift while Cara is draped in the ropes.  Off to a cravate as we’re probably two minutes without talking about the match now.  Now let’s look at Booker and Barrett talking because the match isn’t important I guess.

Josh finally mentions Cara being grounded here, which apparently has NEVER happened to him before.  Honestly, is there something in the water in the announcers’ water cooler?  Cara sends him to the floor and Sheamus may have hurt his knee.  Back in Sheamus catches Cara in a dive and hits a fallaway slam for no cover.  He loads up the High Cross but Cara counters into a rana for the surprise pin at 6:00.

Rating: C+. Not a great match but by far and away Cara’s biggest win to date in WWE.  I’m rather surprised that they would have Sheamus lose here but it looked like a fluke win which is probably the best way to have it happen.  It doesn’t really hurt Sheamus as he had Cara beaten but took too much time to end him, which is good for both guys.

Barrett takes Sheamus down post match and hits Wasteland.  He looks weird in a collared shirt and slacks.

Christian is in the casino with a wallet.  Naturally it belongs to Orton and it’s time to gamble with the $1000 he finds in there.  He says Orton is going to need the money for anger management and his daughter’s college.  Christian puts it all on 1 in a game of roulette and loses it of course.  Christian says Orton’s luck just ran out.  I liked this as it was something outside of the ordinary which you hardly ever see anymore in promos.  Just having something different in the background makes it more interesting.

Time for the showdown which is just the two big guys talking.  Teddy moderates it for lack of a better term.  Henry isn’t going to come farther from the stage though because he can’t hold his temper well enough apparently.  They talk about pain and how it’s Show’s problem apparently.

Show says everyone has been waiting for Henry to wake up and Show finally did it.  Henry asks if Show thinks bigger is better.  Without waiting for an answer, he says stronger and meaner are better.  Both guys say the other has no idea what they’re capable of.  Teddy has to stop a fight and says we’ll see who wins Sunday.  I still don’t get the appeal of this feud.  Scratch that.  I get the appeal, but I just don’t care about Mark Henry at all.

Rosa Mendes vs. Kelly Kelly

 

Non title here.  I have absolutely no idea what to talk about here.  Match is over and there’s just nothing to say.  Kelly wins with the K2 at 1:49.  The majority of the match was spent talking about jobs Rosa has had.  Nothing else to say at all.  Oh and Alicia was at ringside and did nothing at all.

Johnny Curtis pulls an elephant out of a bag which is supposed to be a cat.  Apparently it’s the big elephant in the room.  They’re really running out of ideas aren’t they?

Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater

 

Both guys have their own music now.  Slater says he’s tired of being held back and that he’ll show he’s better tonight.  Nice technical stuff to start as they know each other really well.  The crowd doesn’t seem to care at all but you can’t have everything I guess.  Gabriel starts fighting back but can’t hit the 450.  Cole runs his mouth some more as Slater misses a moonsault.  The 450 hits and we’re done at 2:52.  Well Slater looks like nothing now.

Video on Punk vs. Cena, which is the same from NXT.

Randy Orton vs. Kane

 

For some reason I’ve wanted to see a proper feud between these two for years.  Just seems like it would be good.  Orton hammers away to start which doesn’t really work.  Christian is on the stage.  Kane hammers away as he is known to do.  The clothesline hits and he calls for the chokeslam about 75 seconds into this.  Orton counters with right hands but he can’t take Kane down.  He manages to get the powerslam and the elevated DDT.  RKO is countered and Orton sees Christian, allowing Kane to send him to the floor.  Christian throws a drink at Randy and runs into the crowd.  It’s enough for the count out at 2:58 though.

Orton chases after Christian and gets him near Kane and the beatdown is on.  Kane doesn’t like Christian though and chases him off.  Orton pops up and hits the RKO on Kane but Christian hits a spear and pounds on Randy.  Christian gets a chair but Orton gets it away from him as the Canadian runs.  Kane takes a chair shot.  Make that a lot of them.  Orton goes all bugged eyed on Christian to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. Good show but it was a step behind what the others have been recently.  That being said, they had some good matches and a story going throughout the show.  Also they had some nice build for the PPV so maybe it wasn’t all that bad of a show.  It’s not as good as some others they’ve done, but still for a go home show, this was really pretty good.

Results

Ezekiel Jackson b. Ted DiBiase – Torture Rack

Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan – Beautiful Disaster

Sin Cara b. Sheamus – Hurricanrana into a pin

Kelly Kelly b. Rosa Mendes – K2

Justin Gabriel b. Heath Slater – 450 Splash

Kane b. Randy Orton via countout




Impact Wrestling – July 14, 2011 – Clowns R Us?

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 14, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the first show post Destination X and most importantly it’s the Midsummer Nightmare.  The main event is Sting vs. Anderson for the title in Anderson’s first match I believe.  He’s also in Immortal now and since they have all the power, I’d bet a lot on Sting getting the title back since that’s what almost always happens: one side gets all the power including the title and then they lose it on the next show.  Let’s get to it.

We open with a Bully Ray narrated video about the whole Sting vs. Anderson feud and title match tonight.  Hogan comes out in a tuxedo along with Immortal.  There are various women with them too.  Even Abyss is in most of a tuxedo.  Everyone is in a tux here.  No Anderson though.  There’s a card table in the ring and Bischoff sends the girls away.  Eric says they’re here to gamble with some people’s careers, because they can according to Hulk.

Bischoff talks about the party that Anderson threw for himself a few weeks back that no one came to.  Tonight Immortal is making up for it though because Anderson is part of the family now.  The party tonight is in celebration of Anderson as the world champion.  Here comes the champ in a camouflage tuxedo.  When I woke up today, I really didn’t think I’d see one of those but I guess you never know what you’re going to see.

Hogan says he and Anderson haven’t seen things eye to eye forever for the most part.  However there’s always been the constant of them both wanting to be the best they could possibly be.  Hulk calls him champ and formally welcomes him into Immortal.  Anderson says this is a gamble to join Immortal but as long as Bischoff and Hogan live up to their promise of him being the top card in the deck, it’s a gamble he’s willing to take.

The lights go out and Sting is at the card table.  He says he heard someone say gamble and wanted to join in.  Eric accused Sting of being the cancer and that tonight Anderson gets rid of it.  Sting asks if Eric wants to bet on that because they have a poker table here.  Sting sees himself becoming champion tonight and kicking off his crusade of bringing the company back to Dixie Carter.  Didn’t he start that months ago?

Hogan threatens Sting with attacking him and says that Sting is leaving on a stretcher.  Sting freaks out and says no a lot.  Even Sting is starting to worry about himself.  Sting says Hogan is wrong about that because he has a lot of aces in the whole, such as the Network Ace.  He recalls that the Network told Hogan and Bischoff that they’re on a short leash with little room for error.  Apparently any shenanigans will bring about someone with a bigger bite than Sting’s.

Sting says he has a lot of magic bullet aces.  They’re magic because they’ll just appear.  He points to the rafters and there are four clowns up there.  Eric: “You’re a freak!”  Sting: “Why thank you Eric!”  Sting says he’s all in tonight (hasn’t he said that before?) and turns over the poker table before leaving.  We go to a break with Immortal being confused.

Bound For Glory Series Standings with 8 weeks to go:

Crimson 31

Gunner 21

Devon 21

Matt Morgan 14

AJ Styles 14

James Storm 14

Rob Van Dam 14

Bully Ray 14

Scott Steiner 7

D’Angelo Dinero 0

Bobby Roode 0

Samoa Joe 0

Bound For Glory Series: Samoa Joe vs. Bobby Roode vs. D’Angelo Dinero

 

No entrances other than the very ending of Joe’s music.  Joe jumps Roode to start us off and hammers him down in the corner.  Pope heads to the floor and Roode gets crushed in the corner.  Pope stays on the floor as Roode makes a comeback with the spinebuster.  His arm gives out though and Pope comes back in, hitting an STO for two.  With Joe down Pope takes over on Roode, working over the arm.

The fans are behind Bobby here.  Pope gets a DDT for two but Hebner looked like he counted REALLY slow on the three.  Middle rope fist gets two for Pope.  Joe finally starts getting back in but Pope knocks him right back.  DDE misses and Roode fires off some clotheslines.  Russian legsweep puts Pope down and Joe is knocked back to the floor again.  Blockbuster hits for a close two.

We finally get everyone in the ring at once and Roode gets a Perfectplex on Joe for two.  Joe gets the Clutch but we get the Austin vs. Hart at Survivor Series 96 ending as Roode climbs the ropes and goes backwards onto Joe for the pin at 5:55.  Roode was tapping just after the three.  Joe freaks out on the referee post match.

Rating: C+. Not bad here and the idea of keeping Joe out worked well enough I guess.  Not much of a match otherwise but for a six minute TV triple threat it was fine.  They didn’t go fully into the standard procedure for one of these matches which is a perk and it’s good to see one of them getting somewhere in this series.  Also you can probably expect Joe to just start ending people with submissions soon.

The Jarretts are here.

Hogan wants Sting eliminated tonight.  He’s talking to all of Immortal rather than just Anderson.  Eric implies staging an accident which Abyss kind of volunteers for.  Eric blasts Abyss for losing the X Title and says get this done someone.  Abyss leaves and the Jarretts are here.  They have presents for everyone but Hogan gets the AAA World Title.  No mention of the company name that I could hear.

Pope is with D-Von’s kids and D-Von says stay away from them.  The kids leave and D-Von yells at Pope.  Pope says they look up to him and D-Von calls him a con man.  D-Von calls Pope stupid for giving up the seven points.  Pope says if the kids turn their backs on D-Von, that’s not his fault and he leaves.

Highlight package from Destination X with highlights from every match.

Austin Aries vs. Shannon Moore

 

Shannon gets some arm drags very fast to start us off.  Apparently the X-Division has their own locker room.  Basic X-Division style match here which is fast paced with some nice speed stuff.  Aries can’t get control or deal with Moore’s speed but finally gets a forearm to the back.  Brainbuster is blocked and Aries mostly skins the cat back in through the top and middle ropes.

He gets dropkicked to the floor though and Moore hits a dive to take him down.  Something similar to a Whisper in the Wind gets two.  Aries grabs the Book of Dilligaf but gets it taken away.  He keeps the chain though and after knocking Moore out, a slingshot spinning splash ends this at 3:42.  Shelley runs out to yell at Aries post match.

Rating: C. Not bad and just a basic debut for Aries who needed a win to establish himself on the roster.  Things got a bit sloppy here but they fit in a lot of stuff in a short amount of time so it’s hard to complain.  Aries will likely get a lot more time soon and that’ll help him a lot, even though he’s rather skilled already.

Abyss wants his title back tonight.  He turns to leave and one of the clowns from earlier blasts him with a bat.

Shelley and Moore complain about Aries cheating.

Aries says he’s the best and that he doesn’t think he can be beaten.

Recap of Tara vs. Madison and their feud that has barely meant anything in like a month.  Both chicks talk about their match tonight and Tara has a gift for Madison but it’s for after the match.

The match is after a break.

Ad for Bound For Glory which will be in Philadelphia.

Steiner shows off for one of the girls from earlier and gets jumped by a clown as well.

Madison Rayne vs. Tara

 

Tara has the gift for Madison but it’s for after the match remember.  Madison wants Tara to lay down like before.  Tara takes over to start and hits her standing moonsault.  There’s the spinning side slam and this is looking like a squash.  No cover though and the Widow’s Peak is countered.  Tara gets sent to the apron and dropped face first onto it.  So much for the squash.  Tara is sent into the steps and Madison goes for the present.  And it’s a spider.  Madison screams at it and the distraction allows Tara to get up and hit the Widow’s Peak for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: D. Seriously, who cares?  This feud started what, last year?  Who in the world cares at this point about these two and whatever issue they have?  The Knockout Division is dying for capable wrestlers at this point and all we can get is Angelina Love being all creepy and these two talking about a spider?  Such a shame.  Nothing match here too which was all about setting up the spider thing.

Tara chases her off with the spider post match.

Angle is coming to the ring.

The Brits are mad at Mexican America.  Tonight they fight for the #1 contender spot.  About time Beer Money defended the belts.

Here’s Kurt, who says he has his title shot at Hardcore Justice.  He’d prefer to face Anderson due to their history together.  He remembers the cage match and thought there was some respect there, until Anderson joined Immortal.  Title match or not, Angle is coming for Anderson.  As for Sting, they have history also in the form of the Main Event Mafia and the empty arena match.  Angle has never beaten Sting before (yes he has) and that doesn’t sit well with him.  He’s leaving Hardcore Justice as the champion, and it’s real.

The Jarretts try to leave and a clown jumps Jeff in the car and takes him away with the bat to Jeff’s throat.

Mexican America vs. British Invasion

 

This is for the #1 contendership.  I wouldn’t have guessed this but Beer Money’s current reign is the longest reign in the history of the TNA tag titles.  The Mexicans say their usual stuff pre-match.  The Brits storm the ring and we’re ready to go.  Williams dives out of the ring onto Hernandez and it’s Magnus vs. Anarquia to start us off.  Off to Williams who gets caught by Hernandez off a blind tag.

Shoulder block sets up a backbreaker submission into a regular backbreaker for two.  Mexican America takes over as we talk about the clowns taking Immortal out.  More double teaming keeps Williams down but he manages to get a middle rope European uppercut to bring in Magnus.  Williams is bleeding a bit from his head.  Magnus takes over and beats up both guys.  Anarquia gets double teamed and a top rope elbow gets two for Magnus.  Their top rope European uppercut hits but Rosita comes out for the distraction, allowing Hernandez to drill Magnus and let Anarquia pin him at 6:43.

Rating: C. Just a tag match here and thankfully we finally have some challengers for Beer Money.  The girl coming out at the end worked fine as it was what the Brits were worried about in the first place.  Not bad, but just a tag match for the most part here.  Also it gives the Mexicans something to do.

Eric says it’s up to Gunner and Ray to take Sting down.  Gunner wants to go find the clowns and Sting instead of just waiting around.  Ray stays behind though.

Video of Kendrick winning the title on Sunday.

Kendrick defends next week.  Also Mickie defends against Velvet and there will be a four way ladder match in the BFG series.

Main event is next.

Gunner has a pipe and is looking for the clowns and here they come, pounding their bats on the ground like a revival of West Side Story.  They surround him and take him down with a shot to the knee.  The clowns beat him down and he’s outmatches.  They take their masks off band it’s Fourtune.  They say Ray is already taken care of.

TNA World Title: Mr. Anderson vs. Sting

 

Anderson has the mic in hand but doesn’t say anything this week.  Pretty slow start as they’re feeling each other out.  Sting gets a solid dropkick to send Anderson to the floor.  Back in Anderson can’t get a sunset flip so Sting punches him in the face.  Stinger Splash hits but a second one misses as Anderson dropkicks the knee.  Anderson works on the knee and tries the Scorpion on him.

That doesn’t last long and Anderson works on the leg a bit more.  There’s a half crab which is more like a half Liontamer.  Sting kicks him off and does a good job of selling the knee.  He manages to hit the Mic Check for a close two.  There’s your required ref bump and Sting gets the Scorpion which looks awful here.  Anderson taps but there’s no ref.  Here’s Bully Ray who Fourtune said was taken care of.

He hammers Sting and pulls out a chain.  The lights go out and there’s another clown in the ring.  He takes out Ray and looks at Anderson but the lights go out again.  When they come back Anderson is alone in the ring and the clown is on the ramp.  Sting pops up and the Death Drop gives Sting the title back at 9:11.

Rating: C+. I liked this actually.  It’s probably their best match ever which isn’t saying much given their pretty weak efforts a lot of the time.  The ending with the clown was kind of overbooked but they tried and made a decent effort out there.  Not sure what the point was in giving Anderson the title for a month but it’s whatever I guess.

Angle was the clown.  The reveal ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Well it was a bit down from previous weeks but this certainly was better than I was expecting.  I’m not a fan of a lot of the stories they have going on, but there was a nice pacing to the show and the stories make sense for the most part.  Nice to see Fourtune back into things as a unit again so it’s not Sting vs. the whole Immortal team.  Not a great show but it’s definitely not bad.  I’d call this a nice surprise.

Results

Bobby Roode b. Samoa Joe and D’Angelo Dinero – Roode pinned Joe while in the Koquina Clutch

Austin Aries b. Shannon Moore – Slingshot spinning splash

Tara b. Madison Rayne – Widow’s Peak

Mexican America b. British Invasion – Anarquia pinned Magnus after a forearm from Hernandez

Sting b. Mr. Anderson – Scorpion Death Drop




Monday Night Raw – July 11, 2011 – Punk vs. Vince. Table and Ice Cream Included.

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 11, 2011
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for MITB and things should be rather interesting here.  It’s probably going to be either Punk’s last or next to last Raw so the talking could be great.  With Vince being around now there’s a chance he might pop up too.  Also we’ll get some build for the MITB match itself.  The interesting thing though is that the guys just got back from Australia so they’re likely going to be tired from the flight.  Let’s get to it.

Here’s Punk to open the show with a bullhorn.  He also grabs a headset and says something to the producer on it that we can’t here.  Punk sits in the ring and asks if he has everyone’s attention now.  He says recapping is in order in case you didn’t watch, which he didn’t because he wasn’t on, so last week he was suspended for what he said a few weeks ago.  Punk sums it up by saying he gets in trouble for saying things that no one else has the balls to say.

He demonstrates the bullhorn in case the mic is cut off.  The fans are totally behind him here and there’s a loud CM PUNK chant.  He says he’s here because Vince wants to sign him to a very long and lucrative contract to WWE.  Oddly enough all he’s ever wanted is a microphone.  I think you can buy one for like 12 bucks at Wal-Mart dude.  Punk says he’s been doing what Vince has wanted to do for years: making the WWE relevant in the real world.

That has only happened twice apparently: when Punk talks and when someone dies (no names mentioned).  Everyone from ESPN to E is calling him for his story.  Punk finds it funny that only now is Vince begging him to stay.  If Vince had treated him like this for the last five years, there wouldn’t be so much ammo built up for him to use.  Punk wants a live contract negotiating tonight in which Vince might have to join Punk’s version of Vince’s old kissing club.

Cue Cena who says cut the music.  Punk thanks him for getting him a job back that he didn’t even want.  He says he’s going to change the look of the title when he wins it because it’s been far too ugly for far too long.  Punk points out that Cena isn’t going to be fire because he was once before and it lasted like a week.  Cena: “You done?”  Punk: “Probably not but would you like to say something?”

Cena says that Punk has been talking about how he’s walking out of Chicago with the title and there’s nothing that can stop him.  Cena is no pushover though and now let’s talk about the word wrestler.  People have said for years that Punk is great and that Cena is what the company thinks is great.  Everyone has said that Punk is great over the years and a lot of names are mentioned including Eddie and Angle.  We’ll see how great they both are on Sunday.  A GM E-Mail says Vince is on the way and Cena is in action next.

John Cena vs. David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty

 

Cena vs. McGillicutty to start and Cena treats the champions like the jobbers they are, sending him to the floor as we take a quick break.  Back with Cena in a chinlock, apparently due to interference from Otunga.  STF attempt doesn’t work and it’s off to Otunga.  The match is completely boring as the announcers rant about how important the title is.  You know, that belt that they made a second version of at the drop of a hat.

Cena takes Otunga down and it’s off to McGillicutty who gets dominated.  You Can’t See Me and there’s the Shuffle.  AA is broken up by Otunga and they hit an atomic drop/dropkick combination for two.  Superplex by McGillicutty is blocked and there’s the top rope Fameasser to set up the STF but Otunga makes the save again.  Well at least it hasn’t been total Cena dominance.  And never mind as the AA ends McGillicutty at 9:56.

Rating: C-. Pretty boring match here but then again the Nexus are very boring to put it mildly.  I really don’t mind the champions losing again because it’s not like they’ve been built up in the slightest anyway.  Not sure why the GM would give Cena a seemingly hard match like that but maybe Punk will get one too.

Video on Henry being all dominant and evil lately.

Vickie is coaching Dolph on how to talk to Vince tonight.  The US Title needs to be the premiere title apparently so Punk and Cena need to be fired.  Vickie imitates Vince before Drew pops up and imitates him.  Dolph makes fun of “Vince” and they all make fun of his breath.  Vickie snorts when she laughs and Vince pops up behind them (big pop).  Tonight they’ll be in a handicap match against Big Show.  They leave and Vince is asks for a message for the people.  He doesn’t want to talk to the people right now.

Kelly Kelly vs. Melina

 

The Bellas are on commentary.  Jerry gets on Cole for saying there’s a way to tell the Bellas apart which they say doesn’t exist.  Kelly is in trouble early but takes over, uses a Stinkface for no apparent reason and hits the K2 to retain at 1:45.  Total nothing match.

Post match the Bellas say Kelly is way to skinny and wears way too much makeup.  They beat her down and Eve comes out for the save.  The Bellas leave her laying.

Quick recap of Miz destroying Riley after losing to him last week.

Here’s Miz and there are ladders everywhere.  He climbs up to the top of one underneath the MITB case.  He knows what it means to win the case and be world champion.  He’s taken that path before and since he’s the future, he’ll do it again.  Miz says he’s used to being above everyone else because he’s the best.  Cue Swagger who points out that he’s won the case and the title before.  Miz: “If someone cashed in MITB and no one remembers it, did it really happen?”

Cue Bourne who says he’s tired of hearing about what they’ve done so he’s going to talk about what he’ll do Sunday.  Bourne gets a running start and slides into the ring feet first with no hands.  Here’s Kofi who says the exact same thing that everyone else in the match is going to come out and say.  He talks about Edge getting hurt in these matches or something like that.  Truth comes out and talks about beating Cena recently.  He’s afraid of heights too, and there better not be any spiders on the ladder because he’s afraid of them too.  If he opens that case and there’s a spider, the grits will hit the pan.

Here’s Riley because six promos about one match isn’t enough.  He comes out at a spring and Miz runs.  Here’s Alberto in a Mercedes.  He got rid of Rey and now has to do all this all over again.  Oh and something about destiny.  An E-Mail makes a six man that starts right now.

The Miz/Jack Swagger/R-Truth vs. Alex Riley/Evan Bourne/Kofi Kingston

 

No Alberto or Rey here.  Back with the match already in progress with Bourne vs. Swagger.  Off to Miz as Cole talks about how awesome Miz is.  Everyone beats down Bourne for a bit with Truth in the ring at the moment.  Bourne gets a knee to the face and it’s hot tag to Kofi.  He comes in off a springboard and starts jumping all over the place.  Boom Drop to Truth.  He loads up Trouble in Paradise but stops to hit Swagger.

There’s the springboard cross body to Truth but Miz saves.  Truth knocks him to the floor as we take a break.  Back with Kofi getting beaten down by Miz.  Off to Truth who gets a two count.  Kofi manages to get a double DDT to Truth and Swagger and tags Morrison.  He hits a bunch of stuff on Swagger and beats on Miz a bit because he can.  Everything breaks down and Riley hits the inverted DDT on Swagger for the pin at 10:45 total.

Rating: C. Just an average match here with nothing of note going on.  You get almost the same match every year and it’s really not all that interesting.  Not a bad match or anything but really just kind of there.  They need to go with six people in the match instead of 8 as there are just too many of them that way.  Not bad, but the same stuff we always see out of these.

Everyone hits their finishers post match until Alberto comes out and destroys everyone with the ladder, including throwing it at Miz’s arm.  Bourne was holding his ankle too.

We recap the ending of Raw last week with Vince and Cena talking about everything involving Punk.   If Cena loses at the PPV he’s fired.

McIntyre/Ziggler vs. Show up next.

Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler vs. Big Show

 

Show is all mad here.  Ziggler starts and looks at Show.  He tags out immediately so Show beats them both up.  Show dominates Drew as Ziggler hides.  Drew tries to leave and gets mauled by Show.  McIntyre gets thrown up the stage and it’s a countout at 2:00.

Show sets to chokeslam McIntyre off the stage but Henry comes out of nowhere and tackles both of them off the stage.  Henry goes flying also.  Drew just kind of disappears.

Henry doesn’t want help to the back.

We get a clip of Alberto destroying everyone earlier, setting up a long highlight video on MITB matches.

We run down the card for the PPV.

Punk and Vince are up next.

Vince comes out three times because the reaction isn’t strong enough for him.  No handshake for Cole.  He shakes hand with someone at ringside that is either famous or really lucky.  There’s a table and a red carpet in the ring.  He doesn’t want to negotiate in person but he’ll do it here.  He wants to get this over with so get out here.  Punk imitates Vince’s walk as is required by WWE law.

Vince’s chair falls down as he sits in it.  The contract has the provision for a Punk collector’s cup in it apparently.  Punk talks about how this contract proves that Vince has no faith in Cena.  Vince says he couldn’t live with himself if Punk somehow wins the title on Sunday.  He actually calls Punk Phil.  Punk doesn’t like the contract that’s made up so he had his lawyers make a new one.  Punk has already signed this one.

One of the provisions is he gets to push Vince.  Apparently Punk wants respect or he’s leaving with the title.  Apparently that wasn’t a provision.  The first is that he wants a jet.  As in a new one, not Vince’s because that one smells.  Punk wants his face on the Tron, the buckles, spoons, knives, forks, cups, everything.  HE WANTS THE ICE CREAM BARS BACK!!!  Punk is officially better than everyone.  That actually gets a HUGE reaction.

He wants CM Punk The Movie.  You can even call it the Chaperone II, although his will be funny and successful.  Oh and the main event of Wrestlemania will be Punk vs. whomever he’s against.  The last major perk is that he wants an apology for the suspension and for Vince being a huge hypocrite.  As far as the anti-bullying campaign goes, Vince is one of the biggest bullies Punk has ever met.  The fans are eating up every word Punk says.

Punk says his friends have worked here and they have been fired.  Vince says they deserved to be fired and Punk says that Vince is out of touch for firing people like Luke Gallows and Colt Cabana.  Vince doesn’t want to apologize so Punk throws the table over.  The fans want something that was either ice cream or wrestling.  Vince doesn’t care what the people want and Punk says that’s the point.

The fans want an apology right now and Vince actually says he’s sorry.  The fans chant for Colt Cabana as Vince picks up the contract to sign it.  Here’s Cena though who points out that even though the fans are cheering for him now, Punk is walking out on them Sunday.  Cena calls him a terrorist and says they’re both like kids.  Cena says he hates Vince too and makes stupid jokes.

Now we get to the awesome stuff.  Cena tells Punk that he’s lost sight of what got him here.  Punk talks about how at Wrestlemania 23 he was riding on the side of Cena’s car with a Tommy gun, saying that he promised himself that one day he would be in the ring with Cena instead of watching him.  Boston prides itself on being the underdog but now Cena is the WWE Champion and has become exactly what he hates.  Now he and Vince are the New York Yankees.  Cena drills him and Punk bails.  Apparently the man Vince shook hands with was Cena’s dad.

Punk sits on the stage and says that illustrates why he wants to leave.  He’s tired of all this and he’s leaving on Sunday.  Say goodbye to the WWE Title, say goodbye to John Cena and say goodbye to CM Punk.  He tears up the contract and does You Can’t See Me to end this.  The ending segment ran a bit too long and it hurt things.

Overall Rating: C+. Well the wrestling was pretty awful but the show got pushed very hard tonight.  The Raw side is built on two matches and those were pushed very hard indeed.  Anything else that happens at the PPV will be bonus material so it’s hard to complain about the lack of wrestling.  Ok no it isn’t but it’s more forgivable here.  Not a great show but for a go home show for this particular PPV, this was fine.

Results

John Cena b. David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty – AA to McGillicutty

Kelly Kelly b. Melina – K2

Evan Bourne/Alex Riley/Kofi Kingston b. The Miz/R-Truth/Jack Swagger – Inverted DDT to Swagger

Big Show vs. Dolph Ziggler/Drew McIntyre went to a double countout




Destination X 2011 – Well That Certainly Was All X Division

Destination X 2011
Date: July 10, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Jeremy Borash

It’s the X-Division show as the division that has gone from the focal point of the company is now relegated to a show that gets four weeks of buildup!  Anyway the main event is Daniels vs. AJ in a face vs. face respect match.  Daniels has had the seeds planted for a heel turn though so it’s a distinct possibility.  The six sided ring is back for tonight only and there are a lot of X-Division style matches.  Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how these guys have been around since the beginning and set a new standard in wrestling.  Abyss gives a voiceover about the Art of War and we get parts of Kendrick’s promo from Impact about how various religions view life and God.

Samoa Joe vs. Kazarian

 

Kaz goes straight at him at the bell and Joe is like dude no and chops away.  Kaz escapes the Clutch and Joe tries to fly, only to have Kaz move.  Joe doesn’t crash though and takes Kaz down on the floor.  Kaz tries to dive off the apron and Joe just steps to the side.  I love when he does that.  Back inside now and Joe hits an enziguri in the corner.  Kaz tries a springboard move and lands in an atomic drop.

Almost all Joe so far as he takes Kaz down again.  Headbutt by Joe hurts a lot more because he’s Samoan.  There’s a knee drop for two.  Joe puts him in Musclebuster position but chops him instead.  Kaz finally gets something of note with a springboard dropkick to put both guys down.  Joe hammers away but walks into a slam.  Yeah just a slam.  There’s that spinning legdrop that has a cool name that I can’t think of.

Slingshot DDT gets two for Kaz.  Joe goes up and Kaz gets an enziguri to stop him.  Kaz tries to load up the Flux Capacitor (C4) but they tumble out to the floor and Joe hits a suicide dive to take over again.  Back in and Joe hammers on the back a bit.  Kaz tries the Fade to Black but gets caught in a powerbomb for two.  Off to an STF by Joe which is transitioned into a Crossface which doesn’t work either.  Joe finally gets the choke and Kaz somehow makes the rope after being in the hold long enough to probably kill him.  Joe argues with the referee and Kaz rolls him up for the weak pin.

Rating: B-. This would have been higher with a better finish.  I mean it came out of nowhere and had zero heat.  I don’t know what Joe did to go on this losing streak and be pushed this far down the card but he must have done something akin to giving away Foley winning the title.  Anyway, good match up until the ending.  With another three minutes or so this could have been awesome.

We’re going to look back at AJ vs. Daniels throughout the years with the first one being from Unbreakable.  So I guess we’re skipping the 2-3 years of them feuding before that?

Daniels arrives.

Eric Young is at a convention of some sort and runs into Curry Man, Suicide and Sangriento signing autographs.  He wants a partner for tonight and Shark Boy shows up and will be his partner.  Curry Man can’t do it because he’s got a Fire Championship match tomorrow in Tokyo vs. Cody Deaner.  Oh dear.

Douglas Williams vs. Mark Haskins

 

Haskins is a British guy making his debut.  He looks like John Morrison mixed with someone far less interesting.  This is the open challenge.  Williams says the other Brits (minus his opponent) can leave.  He praises Haskins but says he’s in over his head here.  Williams is in trunks here which is kind of weird to see.  They start off fast with a pinfall reversal sequence and the overly annoying fans chant USA.

Nice technical stuff to start and Haskins sends him to the floor.  He follows him out and hammers away which doesn’t last long.  Williams takes over back inside and slaps him in the face.  Clothesline takes Haskins down again and Williams throws on an inverted Gory Special.  They slug it out with Williams taking over.  He can’t hit Rolling Chaos Theory and here comes Haskins.  Cutter gets two.

Williams goes up but jumps into a superkick.  Haskins goes up this time and then does it again.  I mean he comes off and goes back up again.  He tries a shooting star but totally misses, allowing Williams to get the rollup for the win.  Fans were REALLY not impressed there at the end with Haskins.  Williams shakes his hand post match.

Rating: C. Not bad but with all the hype Haskins got, this was pretty pedestrian.  Also not much of a match as far as an open challenge.  I’d have wanted to see more than that as far as star power but it wasn’t bad.  Just kind of there for the most part but I’ve seen far worse.  Haskins isn’t what he’s cracked up to be but he tried.

Austin Aries is with So Cal Val and says her outfit isn’t an outfit of the year candidate but he’ll give it about three and a half stars.  He talks to all the fans and all those watching on illegal streams, hoping they all choke.  Aries says he’s the best and everyone will find that out tonight.

Generation Me vs. Eric Young/Shark Boy

 

This is a bonus match.  I can never remember which Buck is which.  Eric and Shark Boy tag about five times before the match starts.  Ok so Jeremy is the blonde.  Got it.  Sharky stomps a mudhole in him early and hammers away in the corner.  There’s the Thesz Press and an elbow.  Eric comes in and beats on both guys a bit.  Off to Sharky who bites Max.  Yep it’s a comedy match.

Jeremy throws on a chinlock as Sharky is still ridiculously over.  Clothesline misses and Shark Boy gets a shot to the back of the head to put both guys down.  Young pulls his tights down to shift to trunks and gets the hot tag.  Gen Me takes over again and a bulldog gets two on Young.  Stunner by Shark Boy sets up a wheelbarrow suplex into a reverse neckbreaker by Young for the pin on Max.  Think Lethal’s Lethal Injection but with a wheelbarrow suplex.

Rating: C-. Just a comedy tag match to fill in some time.  I still hate what they’re doing with the midcard title as it’s being used as a comedy prop like Santino did to the IC Title a few years ago.  Not bad here but it’s really just a filler match and nothing all that great.  Shark Boy’s popularity is still strong though.

Clip of Daniels/Styles winning the tag titles.

Daniels and AJ are excited for the main event.

Zema Ion says he’ll win.

Same video on Ultimate X from Thursday.

The announcers talk for a bit to fill in time while the structure is put up.

Shannon Moore vs. Amazing Red vs. Alex Shelley vs. Robbie E

 

Ultimate X with the winner being #1 contender to the X Title.  Things start out quickly of course and Robbie makes a fast run for the X.  Red gets the always sweet double spin kick.  Robbie looks like he’s having a seizure or something.  Shelley and Red put Robbie on the floor before Shelley beats up Red a bit.  Shelley climbs on Moore’s shoulders but Robbie makes the stop.  Robbie is sitting in the corner and Moore is put in the Tree of Woe at the same time.

Shelley goes for the X but Red saves.  Robbie clears the ring but gets caught in the ring skirt and pummeled by Moore.  Moore and Shelley have a nice little sequence resulting in a moonsault off the stage by Moore to take Alex out.  Red is alone in the ring but Moore gets in quickly to stop him.  Shelley gets crotched and Red gets a shooting star off the shoulders of Moore in a cool spot.

Moore and Red collide so Robbie goes up now.  Red saves of course and fires off some kicks to hurt Robbie.  Robbie manages to throw Red over the top onto the other two guys to clear the ring other than himself again.  The fans are for Red here.  Robbie almost gets there but stops to fist pump, allowing Red to hit a springboard dropkick to take him down.  Moore goes up above the X and on top of the truss.  This is always scary.  I’m terrified of heights so this is really intense for me.

Moore lowers himself onto the X as Red is almost there.  Shelley is trying to catch up and Moore is down on the X now thank goodness.  Shelley kicks him down and casually wins this.  One of the fastest Ultimate X matches ever and I think that might not have been the planned finish.  Came out of nowhere with no spark at all.  Shelley looked like he was waiting on someone to stop him before he pulled it down..

Rating: C. That’s a low grade for Ultimate X, not in general.  Not much here as it was really paint by numbers out there.  I really think the ending didn’t happen as it was planned as things just kind of came to an end rather than with any kind of big spot.  Either way, not a bad match but just kind of bland, especially with no story and having an Ultimate X match for the sake of an Ultimate X match.

Clip of Daniels vs. AJ from Final Resolution 2009 which was good if I remember right.

Low Ki says he’s proven himself for his entire career and he’ll do it tonight for everyone ever told they’re too small etc.

We recap RVD vs. Jerry Lynn which is really just a respect match because they had a bunch of matches that I’ve never considered as great as most people claim they are.  This was supposed to be the main event of Hardcore Justice but Lynn hurt his back.

Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

 

They actually say ECW.  Eh not like anyone is watching so no lawyers will hear it.  Apparently Lynn and JB used to be roommates.  That’s not something I want to picture.  Lot of stalling to start as they circle each other.  Rob grabs a headlock to start and they use a sequence they used in every ECW match they had and built on it every next match.  As always it results in a standoff.

The fans are totally split here.  They speed things up and Lynn gets taken down by a legsweep for two.  Off to an armbar as we hear about Forever Hardcore, JB’s ECW documentary.  Rob misses a kick in the corner but hits a spinwheel kick to Lynn as Lynn goes up.  Superplex is blocked and Lynn tries a tornado DDT to the apron which doesn’t work.  Back in the ring with Rob still in control.

Both guys miss a ton of stuff (due to counters, not botches) and it’s another stalemate.  Rob gets a kick to send him to the floor and teases a dive but stays in the ring.  He holds the ropes open for Jerry and actually lets him back in.  There’s the ECW chant that is required.  Lynn takes a handshake and sends Van Dam to the railing, more or less turning heel mid match.

Lynn hits a running flip off the apron to take Rob out again.  That gets two back in the ring.  Jerry hammers away some more and we hit the chinlock.  German suplex puts Van Dam down again.  Clothesline gets two.  Rob fires back with a kick to the head and Rolling Thunder for two.  Another spin kick sends Lynn to the floor again.  Rob hits the spinning legdrop to Lynn while he’s on the railing.

Slingshot legdrop gets no cover and Rob goes up.  Lynn gets up and shoves Rob off the top and we’re back on the floor again.  Been there quite often in this match.  Just as I was thinking at least this match doesn’t have a bunch of weapons, Lynn grabs a chair.  Rob tries a leg sweep but Lynn hits a Fameasser onto the chair.  Rob is busted open and Lynn gets two off of it.

Rob tries a spinning sunset flip out of the corner (think Booker T) but Lynn throws him across the ring onto the chair for two.  Rob gets a Van Daminator and hits the Five Star out of nowhere for the pin.  Has he been taking lessons from Sting in how to finish a match out of nowhere?

Rating: C+. Not a bad match but the majority of it was just like any other match.  Lynn turning mid match is definitely a good thing because face vs. face gets very boring in a hurry.  I still don’t get the appeal of this pair but I kind of liked this one better than their ECW stuff because it wasn’t as sloppy.  Started slow but it was getting much better at the end.

Jack Evans quotes Eminem and says this is his chance.

Austin Aries vs. Low Ki vs. Zema Ion vs. Jack Evans

 

Christy of course messes up something, in this case Aries’ entrance.  We get some clips of their qualifying matches during each guy’s entrance.  Winner gets a contract of course.  No tagging here thank goodness.  Aries gets a quick two count on Ion as the fans chant “everybody.”  Aries and Low Ki (Kaval for the uneducated) square off and Evans starts flipping.

Spin kick by Evans gets two on Ion.  Low Ki takes over again and hammers on Evans in the corner.  Aries takes Low Ki down and uses some Hogan in late 90s offense for some reason.  He beats up everyone but takes a triple dropkick to send him down.  Evans starts flipping again and hits a dropsault to get two on Ion.  Ion gets his turn to be on offense and gets a bunch of two counts.

Aries takes Ion down and has another showdown with Low Ki.  After getting attacked they both throw submissions on the guys that jumped them.  They manage to yell insults at each other while they have the holds.  Ok that was cool.  With the others outside they argue again and chop it out.  Aries loads up the brainbuster but Low Ki escapes and gets a big kick to Aries’ back.  Evans and Ion are back in now and Ion gets a knee to Evans’ face for two.  Pendulum elbow gets two for Aries.

Ion clears the ring and takes over but Aries stops a dive.  Aries tries a suicide dive but Low Ki gets a fast kick up to send him flying backwards.  Evans comes in and flips a lot but spins around too much as Aries takes him down with a spinning forarm.  The fans chant sign them all.  Ion and Aries are the only ones up right now.  Aries gets a neckbreaker on the rope to put Ion down.  Low Ki gets a cartwheel into a kick to knock Aries off the top and also get two.

Evans blocks a Warrior’s Way to Aries with a rana, getting two.  He calls for the 630 but Ion breaks it up.  Ion hits the 450 on Low Ki but Aries makes the save.  Using the distraction, Evans fires off the 630 but eats knees.  Aries hammers on Evans and hits the brainbuster on Low Ki to win the contract.  Probably the best choice.

Rating: B. Can’t really complain here as this was what the X-Division was built on.  The fans got their flips and probably the best possible outcome here with Aries arguably being the best guy here.  I’d expect to see all of them again in the future which is probably the best thing, especially with how weak the division has been lately.  Fun match.

Aries asks Val if she’s surprised.  He takes the contract and leaves.

Abyss talks about the Art of War and how he’ll keep the title.  He implies he ate his missing teeth.

We recap Abyss vs. Kendrick.  Abyss took the title in an attempt to kill the division and Kendrick is fighting for the honor and tradition of it or something.

X-Division Title: Brian Kendrick vs. Abyss

 

Kendrick fires away at the legs to start and that gets him nowhere.  A cross body is totally no sold which is a cool visual.  Kendrick hammers away but none of it’s working.  Chokeslam is teased but Kendrick bites the fingers to escape.  Kendrick is sent to the floor as Abyss asks if this is it.  Fan: “Nobody likes you Abyss!”  Abyss keeps hammering back in the ring and stops to read a few pages.

Kendrick keeps kicking at the legs and that doesn’t work at all.  Instead Abyss hammers him down in the corner as this has more or less been one sided.  Time for more reading!  A right hand makes him drop the book and apparently that was enough to open him up.  Abyss is all ticked off and Kendrick is able to fight back, hitting a dropkick to send him to the floor.

Back in the ring and Kendrick gets a missile dropkick for two.  Sliced Bread is countered into Shock Treatment which gets two.  Ref is bumped in a really stupid looking spot.  Sliced Bread hits but there’s no referee.  Here’s Bischoff to solid heat.  He yells at Kendrick who decks him.  Immortal runs out and the beating is on.

The X guys run out and get tossed with ease.  They get Kendrick on his own and here are more X guys to fight Immortal.  They clear the ring as I REALLY hope the match doesn’t continue after this.  The ring is cleared out and a chokeslam is countered into a victory roll for Kendrick to win the title.  You know, because the referee didn’t notice FIFTEEN PEOPLE IN THE RING.  Confetti goes off but we’ve got another match to go because Brian Kendrick can’t win a main event match.

Rating: C. Match was pretty boring and despite one of the dumbest moments I’ve ever seen and that this match should have ended the show PERIOD, this was a solid feel good moment and absolutely had to happen on this show.  Otherwise this wouldn’t have made a bit of sense.  It worked though and while the match was boring, the ending worked, lack of common sense aside.

Video on AJ vs. Daniels which I’m sure you’ve gotten the point of in all the talking they’ve done already.

AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

 

Apparently the winner is best X-Division Wrestler EVER, despite AJ’s resume blowing Daniels’ away.  Christy does big match intros again.  Apparently these two named their kids after each other.  That’s borderline creepy.  The latest chant: “Wrestling. YAY!  Hulk Hogan.  Boo!”  Give me a break.  Lots of basic back and forth stuff to start with them knowing each other really well being the idea.

AJ works the arm a bit and they speed it up quickly.  Both guys work the arm and it comes down to another stalemate after about 5 minutes.  They shake hands and AJ puts another armbar on.  The fans are split again.  They speed things up and Daniels hits the floor.  They have a TON of time here so this is going to be a very slow build.  Daniels keeps trying to speed things up but AJ keeps going with the armbar.

They slowly start cranking things up as Daniels takes over.  He works AJ over for a good while but AJ sends him to the floor, adding in a plancha that looked almost like Delirious’ Shadows Over Hell.  Back inside now and AJ hammers away again.  AJ works on the arm AGAIN but at least is using a Fujiwara Armbar here.  Helps a lot when they mix things up.  Out to the apron and AJ counters into a suplex on the apron.

Daniels takes over on the floor.  Back in he chops away at the back and gets a neckbreaker for two.  Pinfall reversal sequence ends in AJ being caught in a Crossface.  Death Valley Driver gets two and Daniels is getting frustrated.  They chop it out and AJ hits an enziguri to put both guys down.  AJ slips off the top and crashes down, letting Daniels get two.  Daniels goes up but gets caught in a Torture Rack which AJ spins out into a powerbomb for two.

Bad Downward Spiral by Daniels sets up the Koji Clutch to AJ.  They’re getting tired here.  AJ makes the rope as this probably needs to end soon.  Daniels uses his variety of strikes but still can’t pin him.  The tape finally comes off Daniels’ arms which is good as it had been dangling for awhile.  AJ snap mares him off the top for two.  He can’t get Angel’s Wings or the Clash (AJ can’t that is) so Daniels hits an STO and release Rock Bottom but the BME eats boot.

Styles Clash out of nowhere gets two as this is nearly half an hour long now.  Angel’s Wings gets two and Daniels is ticked.  They fight to the corner but Daniels can’t hit the Angel’s Wings from up there.  AJ busts out the Spiral Tap but it doesn’t look as good as it usually does.  That’s enough for the pin though at nearly half an hour.

Rating: B. Another good match here but I don’t think it got as epic as they were hoping.  It was one of the longest matches I can ever remember in TNA but at the same time they got sloppy later on in it.  It was good, but I still think the title match should have closed the show.  I’ve never been a big fan of these matches but they’re usually pretty good.  Good choice to end the show, but it’s not like it means anything more than bragging rights.  Also this went too long and the fans were losing interest late in it.

Daniels won’t shake his hand post match.  Ok yes he will.  And that’s it.

Overall Rating: B. This is a very subjective grade and I won’t defend it that much because some people will love it, some will hate it and some will find it at every point in between.  The idea was an all X-Division PPV and they certainly did that.  However, the first probably hour or so was just average at best.  The three main matches delivered, but the match order didn’t work for me.

With the story coming in being Bischoff wanting to kill the X-Division, having the X-Division overcome him should have been the main event and closing scene of the show.  The fourway was good and what the X-Division is built upon.  The main event was good as well and even very good at times.  All around this show worked and was a great showcase of the X Division, but it’s not a blow away show like I think they were shooting for.

The main problem is that this isn’t a show that I would predict meaning much.  It’ll probably be referenced for a few weeks and some of the guys will say how they showed how awesome it was, and then the division will go right back to what it was: a title match thrown on here and there and an occasional bonus match on PPV as an opener.  That’s the nature of the beast though and it’s more or less reality.  That’s probably what hurts this the most, but there’s nothing that can be done about it.

Results

Kazarian b. Samoa Joe – Rollup

Douglas Williams b. Mark Haskins – Pin after a missed shooting star press

Eric Young/Shark Boy b. Generation Me – Wheelbarrow suplex into a neckbreaker to Max Buck

Alex Shelley b. Robbie E, Shannon Moore and Amazing Red – Shelley pulled down the X

Rob Van Dam b. Jerry Lynn – Five Star Frog Splash

Austin Aries b. Zema Ion, Jack Evans and Low Ki – Brainbuster to Low Ki

Brian Kendrick b. Abyss – Victory Roll

AJ Styles b. Christopher Daniels – Spiral Tap