NXT
Date: April 17, 2013
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tony Dawson, William Regal

We’re kind of at a new starting point in NXT with the end of the Regal vs. Ohno feud last week. Granted that’s just in theory because a clean win rarely ends anything in WWE anymore. We also need a new challenger for Langston and the NXT Title. As for tonight though, we have Corey Graves vs. Seth Rollins in a rare singles match for a member of the Shield. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the segment last week which gave us Graves vs. Rollins.

Theme song.

Justin Gabriel vs. Leo Kruger

Their last match was really good so hopefully this one is too. Kruger hits a hard chop in the corner to start and runs Gabriel over with a few shoulder blocks. Off to an armbar by Gabriel which transitions into a top wristlock. Back up and Kruger puts him down with a spinebuster for two, giving us the required Arn Anderson reference. Kruger pounds on the chest for two more and cranks on Gabriel’s neck a bit. Justin comes back with a monkey flip and some solid kicks to the arm.

A BIG spin kick puts Leo down but Kruger breaks up a springboard attempt. Leo gets two off a clothesline but Gabriel grabs a Fujiwara Armbar of all things. Kruger gets to the rope and Justin is very frustrated. The 450 is broken up and Kruger pounds on the crotched Gabriel. A superplex is broken up but Justin’s sunset bomb is countered, followed by a double stomp from Leo. The seated armbar (called the GC3 now) makes Gabriel tap out at 7:12.

Rating: B. Just like last time these two had solid chemistry here. This was a solid back and forth match with two guys who know each other very well. I’m still not clear why they’re fighting other than Kruger being nuts, but the South African connection could easily be expanded upon if need be. Good match here.

Brodus Clay says don’t try this.

Next week it’s Clash of the Champions with the Divas, US (held by Cesaro here), NXT and Intercontinental Title being defended.

We get a video on what the NXT people did at Wrestlemania. The shot of Shield walking through the stadium to their match is pretty awesome. Langston being in a title match is a big moment for NXT as well.

Paige doesn’t buy Summer Rae’s excuse of having to turn off her curling iron. She wants a one on one match but doesn’t think Summer has the backbone to do it. Rae jumps Paige and accepts the challenge.

Baylee vs. Emma

Emma actually does her skin the cat entrance without falling and the fans seem impressed. Baylee hits a quick dropkick and pulls Emma back in from running away. Emma dances into a cover (literally) and gets two so Baylee puts on a neck crank. Back up and Emma dodges a charge into the buckle and hooks a Tarantula of all things. Emma hooks an Indian Deathlock with a bridge and a chinlock (Benoit used to use that move) for the submission at 3:10.

Rating: C-. Not a good match but the more I see of Emma the more I like her. She has a strange likeability to her and her looks don’t hurt anything. The dancing thing started off as stupid but it’s getting over in front of a college crowd like this one and there’s nothing wrong with that. Again, odds are her looks and the outfits she wears likely don’t hurt her popularity.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. Bray Wyatt

Yoshi jumps over Wyatt in the corner but Bray hits a hard running cross body for one. A splash in the corner sets up the dancing bit before the Downward Spiral ends Yoshi at 1:18.

Bray hits his finisher again post match, which is apparently called Sister Abigail. Wyatt says this was a message because he needs us to understand that no one is greater than he is. He’s the eater of worlds and he believes it’s time for the beast to open our eyes.

Corey Graves vs. Seth Rollins

This is a lumberjack match and Ambrose/Reigns apparently have taken the night off. Rollins immediately pounds him down to start and stomps him into the corner but Graves comes back with some rights of his own. Rollins bails to the apron but has to come back in to avoid the lumberjacks. Back in and Corey goes after Seth’s leg with a kick to the inner thigh and a knee crusher.

Seth gets in a shot to the throat and follows up with a corner splash. Another splash hits and Graves falls to the floor. We take a break and come back with Rollins hitting a jumping kick for two and hooking a body vice. Off to a reverse chinlock instead but the cheering of the lumberjacks fires Graves up enough to escape. Rollins misses something off the top and gets hit by a running knee to the chest.

A hard clothesline puts Rollins down and Corey wrenches the knee. Rollins is pulled off the top with a dragon screw legwhip and a gordbuster keeps him down again, but here are Reigns and Ambrose to ringside. Ambrose clotheslines Graves down as Reigns destroys the lumberjacks. The standing sliced bread by Rollins is good for the pin at 7:12 shown of 10:42.

Rating: C. Not great here but the Shield looked awesome at the end. As Regal said, there are twelve bodies down at ringside and two men caused it. The ending was the right idea as it keeps both guys looking strong and leaves you wondering if Graves can put Rollins down or not. In other words, it makes you want to come back for more.

Overall Rating: B. Let’s see. We had four matches with two of them being good to quite good, stuff set up for next week, Shield looking great to end the show, and a cool video on Wrestlemania. For an hour, that’s about as good as you’re going to get. This was also a good example of what I love about NXT: there’s no pressure watching this show. When you watch Raw or Smackdown, there’s this sense that everything is life or death and it gets tiring after awhile. With NXT, they present their stuff and that’s all there is to it. It’s much easier to sit through and it works very well.

Results

Leo Kruger b. Justin Gabriel – GC3

Emma b. Baylee – Bridging Indian Deathlock

Bray Wyatt b. Yoshi Tatsu – Sister Abigail

Seth Rollins b. Corey Graves – Standing Sliced Bread

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

TNA Weekly PPV #13
Date: September 18, 2002
Location: Tennessee State Fairgrounds Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Don West, Mike Tenay

Yes indeed I’m still doing these shows even though I haven’t done one since about Thanksgiving. I have no idea what’s going on at this point in TNA given how long it’s been, but apparently there’s a Gauntlet for the Gold (gauntlet match) for a shot at the tag titles and Ron Killings is defending the title against Jerry Lynn. Let’s get to it.

We open with Goldilocks explaining the rules for Gauntlet for the gold. Basically you have ten teams and two individual wrestlers start. Every minute another wrestler comes out and it’s over the top rope until we get down to two. Then their partners come out and it’s a tag match with the winners getting the belts. I’ve heard of worse ideas. Anyway Scott Hall pops up and says he has a surprise partner. It’s Sean Waltman who pops up for a second. Nice job on the surprise there people.

The announcers run down the card, including a celebrity boxing match. Oh jeez.

Earlier today Brian Lawler tries to jump Jeff Jarrett but Jeff fends him off with some luggage. Jarrett says that he never touched Lawler’s girlfriend April. Apparently April is playing Brian and Lawler can only trust Jeff. Ok then.

Cue Jarrett to the arena where he says he’s had it with Bob Armstrong and his masked man. Either Armstrong comes out now or Jeff is coming back there to get him. Jarrett goes to the back but is jumped by the Masked Bullet. They fight to the ring and Bullet does every single Road Dogg move there is and even says Oh You Didn’t Know into a mic. With Jeff down, Bullet pulls off his mask and it’s…..Road Dogg (called Brian James). Well that’s a bit anti-climactic.

Dogg says that he and Jarrett bailed on the WWF back in 1995 but then Dogg became part of DX. Apparently his name here is BG James with the G standing for “Get It, Got It, Good”. James is going to be in the Gauntlet for the Gold tonight and will find a partner somewhere. I guess Lawler vs. Jarrett is done now.

Jorge Estrada and Sonny Siaki say that it’s all about the Flying Elvises and not Sonny himself. Sonny talks about how we should support Jerry Lynn in the main event tonight, implying that he’s going to interfere.

AJ Styles vs. Kid Kash

Before the match AJ says that Sonny won’t be supporting Jerry Lynn tonight and it’s not over between himself and Jerry. AJ sounds even more like a hick here than he does now. Feeling out process to start with Styles taking over with an armbar. They head to the mat with AJ holding an armbar before Kash escapes a backslide. Both guys snap off some armdrags as we’re told that Low Ki returns next week. A Jericho springboard dropkick puts AJ on the floor and a slingshot rana keeps him down.

AJ gets back up and runs to the apron for a moonsault to take Kash down. Very fast paced stuff so far here. Back in and Styles takes Kash down with a sweet springboard dropkick for two. Kid hits the Bank Roll (kind of a Whisper in the Wind) for two and it’s off to a standing Boston Crab on Styles. That goes nowhere so Kash tries the Money Maker but gets backdropped out to the floor instead. AJ hits a sweet jumping DDT off the apron and both guys are down.

Back in and Kash sends AJ face first into the middle buckle before getting two off a German suplex. AJ comes back with his moonsault into (not really but close enough) the reverse DDT for two. Kash runs up the corner and hits a SWEET rana followed by a tornado DDT for two. AJ comes back with a dropkick to the knee and the always cool nipup into a rana of his own.

Discus lariat gets two on Kash as does a dropkick to the back of his head. AJ loads up another springboard dive but jumps into a dropkick to put both guys down. Kash tries a top rope splash but only his canvas. He manages to crotch AJ, but a top rope rana is countered into a Styles Clash off the middle rope for the academic pin.

Rating: B-. This was just a spotfest and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s not a good match as there have been far better versions of this before, but AJ looked good and that was the right idea here. AJ was rapidly gaining credibility and a win over a decent name like Kash was only going to help that.

Buff Bagwell says that he’s Marcus Bagwell again and wants another chance. BG James pops up and asks him to be his partner in the Gauntlet. Marcus accepts, and I think we’re supposed to buy this as the latest super team. You know, because Bagwell won like five WCW tag titles. Surely you remember his EPIC partnership with The Patriot right?

Here’s Dustin Diamond (Screech from Saved By the Bell) who says that after winning on Celebrity Boxing, he could come here to be a wrestler. This leads to an argument with Tiny the ring announcer and a boxing match is scheduled for later. Please make it short at least.

The Hotshots (Chase Stevens and Cassidy O’Reilly) say they’ve given up their spot in the Gauntlet because they want to earn it in a three way match. They leave and Disco Inferno pops up, looking for Brian Lawler.

Dustin Diamond vs. Tiny the Timekeeper

Boxing match, Tiny is a short fat guy, Dustin knocks him out in 35 seconds. Seriously, that’s it.

Hot Shots vs. Derek Wylde/Jimmy Rave vs. Ace Steele/CM Punk

Indeed, CM Punk was in TNA for a half a cup of coffee. The team who takes the fall here is out of the Gauntlet. Punk has blonde hair here which is a weird look for him. Stevens and Punk get things going and we get a gymnastics exhibition with both guys spinning around with little contact being made. Punk hits a kind of reverse powerbomb onto Steele’s knee with Ace coming in legally. Steele chops away on Chase (Stevens, along with his partner Cassidy O’Reilly) but a blind tag brings in Wylde. He tries to slingshot in, only to be powerbombed down by Chase as things speed up.

Off to Rave vs. O’Reilly with Jimmy getting caught by a slingshot splash. Cassidy likes to dance around a lot and shout at the fans. The Hot Shots hit stereo dropkicks to Rave’s head for two and a leg lariat from Chase puts Rave down. Back to Cassidy who slams Rave down but hits knees while trying a Lionsault. Jimmy tags in Punk who misses a springboard missile dropkick on Chase before having his head taken off by Cassidy.

Everything breaks down and the Hot Shots hit a nice superkick/German suplex combo on Wylde. Cassidy misses a twisting dive to the floor and it’s time to unleash the dives. Back in the ring, Steele puts Stevens in a Gory Special and drops down into a kind of Widow’s Peak to win the match and spot in the Gauntlet.

Rating: D-. Well that sucked. I know it’s blasphemy to say a Punk match sucked, but there’s no other way to put it. This was boring, sloppy and uneventful as none of the six guys were anything special in the slightest. I know Punk would get WAY better, but at this point he was nothing to see at all.

Harris and Storm are ready for the Gauntlet and Harris finally calls Storm buckaroo.

Here are Hall and Waltman with something to say. Hall reminisces about his time with the 1-2-3 Kid and the match they had on Raw in 1993. Waltman (Syxx-Pac here) says that he’s here to be a wrestler, not a sports entetainer. Ron Harris and Brian Lee try to interrupt but get beaten down by the stars.

Brian Lawler panics about his girlfriend missing and says it’s a life or death situation. Next.

Hermie Sadler is praised for being awesome in NASCAR and is invited to be here for the next match.

Bruce comes out to insult Sadler’s wife and calls out some chick from the crowd for a match.

Miss TNA: Bruce vs. ???

She doesn’t even get a name and is pinned by a powerbomb in like a minute. Did I mention they have no idea how to fill an hour and forty five minutes of PPV time at this point?

Sadler gives Bruce an atomic drop post match.

Jerry Lynn is ready for his one shot at greatness when Killings comes in and says Jerry has to kill him to beat him. This wasn’t bad actually.

Gauntlet for the Gold

There are twenty people (ten teams) in this with two individuals starting. It’s a Royal Rumble style match and when there are two people left, the partners return for a tag match for the vacant titles, which were vacated when AJ/Lynn had a double pin against Jarrett/Killings. Brian Lawler is #1 and James Storm is #2. Lawler crotches him on the ropes before the bell but Storm fires off right hands. Apparently Chris Harris is going to be #20.

Storm pounds away to start and a missile dropkick puts Brian down. With nothing else happening, here’s Jose Maximo at #3. Lawler gets double teamed in the corner for a bit before fighting both guys off. Derek Wyles is #4 but after some headscissors, Lawler throws him out. Joel is dumped too and we’re back to Storm vs. Lawler. Actually scratch that as Lawler eliminates his third guy in a row by sending Storm out. You know, because Brian Lawler is AWESOME.

Buff Bagwell is #5 and he comes in with middle fingers blazing. Oh wait he’s Marcus Bagwell here, despite looking and wrestling like he has for years. Bagwell hits a neckbreaker and pounds away in the corner until Kobain is #6. Lawler again gets to dominate some more talented people until Ace Steele is #7. There’s nothing of note to talk about here as it’s just standing around and slowly beating on each other in the corner with Lawler biting Bagwell’s head.

Jorge Estrada is #8 and gets chopped by Steele. The ring is getting too full now. Lawler hits Bagwell low in the corner and Brian Lee is #9. Hopefully he can throw some of these little men out. We don’t get that of course since that would help the match, so here’s Syxx-Pac at #10. Syxx cleans house and dumps Jose off a chop (yes a chop) before hitting the Bronco Buster on Marcus.

CM Punk (Steele’s partner) is #11 but Steele is thrown out before Punk makes it to the ring. We hear about how impressive it is that Lawler has lasted ELEVEN minutes as Jimmy Rave (Derrick Wylde) is #12. Punk hits a Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog on Rave as there are too many people out there. Ron Harris (Brian Lee) is #13 to give us our first full team. Their dominance is shown as they send Jorge to the apron, but the Karate Elvis (again, seriously) sunset flips Lee down to survive. The second attempt works though and Estrada is gone.

Punk and Rave are tossed by the big guys as well, meaning two full teams are eliminated. Syxx sends out Bagwell and Lawler (no fanfare, which is odd as the announcers have spent ten minutes worshipping the guy) as BG James (Marcus Bagwell) is #14. We get heel miscommunication between Lee and Harris but Road Dogg (blonde here for some reason) gets stomped down I the corner. Joel Maximo (Jose Maximo) is #15 and is out about two seconds later.

Syxx gets hit with a big double spinebuster but since Waltman is a GIANT KILLER he clotheslines both of them down at once. Since we haven’t seen enough of him tonight, here’s Brian Lawler AGAIN to throw out Syxx. Slash (Kobain) is #16 and BG James is triple teamed. Sonni Siaki (Jorge Estrada) is #17 and he goes after Slash to give James a breather.

Disco Inferno (Brian Lawler) is #18 as the match continues to drag. Scott Hall (Syxx Pac) is #19 and he pounds away on Lee. Ron Harris is dumped out and Chris Harris (James Storm) is #20, giving us a final grouping of Hall, Chris Harris, Siaki, Disco, James and Lee. The announcers aren’t sure if Slash was eliminated despite seeing him go over the top. Siaki is dumped and Disco gets caught between Hall and BG until Hall finally knocks him out. Hall and James square off but Lee jumps both guys for stereo eliminations, getting us down to Harris vs. Lee, meaning the battle royal is over.

Rating: D. This was long and dull with the partner thing going almost nowhere. Between that and the worship of Brian Lawler, this never went anywhere. The fast intervals helped, but so many of these people are unknown for the most part, which makes it hard to care about any of them. Also the two giants looked pitiful out there for the most part which didn’t do them any favors.

Tag Titles: James Storm/Chris Harris vs. Brian Lee/Ron Haris

Ron chokeslams James on the stage to start things off as a handicap match. Also here’s Jeff Jarrett to beat up BG James and take the focus off the title match. Lee kicks Chris in the face as AMW (are they even called that yet?) is in big trouble. Chris comes back for a bit but gets clotheslined down for two. West points out the problem here: too many people named James and Harris.

Storm finally gets back in and cleans house, only to get caught in a chokeslam/belly to back suplex combo for no cover. Ron pulls out a table for no apparent reason and lays Storm out on top of it. Lee loads up Chris in a chokeslam but gets rolled up (and into the ropes) to give AMW the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This was barely even a match with Chris getting beaten down for a few minutes and Storm being on the floor most of the time. The table thing was stupid and the ending was even worse as both guys were in the ropes for the fall and the referee counted it anyway. Nothing to see here, but at least the right team won.

BG James is bloody in the back to make sure the tag titles get no focus.

NWA World Title: Ron Killings vs. Jerry Lynn

If Lynn wins, he’s a Triple Crown Champion three months after the promotion started. Truth jumps him to start and elbows Lynn down before talking a lot of trash. Tenay thinks that whoever controls the match will win. This man is the PROFESSOR people. A headscissors puts Truth down and a backbreaker gets two for Jerry. Lynn hits what appeared to be a slingshot elbow to the groin in the corner but Truth pops up and throws him out to the floor.

The champion drops Jerry face first onto the announce table and Lynn is busted open. Back in and a kind of belly to back suplex gets two for Truth and he shows Jerry’s bloody face to the camera. Lynn comes back with his spinning sunset flip out of the corner for two but Truth does his backflip into a drop down into a side kick sequence. They head back to the floor with Truth ramming Jerry’s bloody head into the post and gouging at the cut.

Back in again and Truth puts on a modified surfboard but Lynn grabs the rope. The ax kick gets two for Truth but Jerry comes back with a spinning rollup for two of his own. Truth stays on offense as AJ Styles is at ringside. Now Kid Kash and the S.A.T. come down as well. Here are the Flying Elvises as the fans are ALL behind Lynn. Jerry makes a comeback with some clotheslines but the cradle piledriver is countered. Lynn reverses a suplex into a DDT for two but AJ breaks up the pin. The challenger goes up but Siaki shoves him down, allowing Truth to hit a Diamond Cutter for the pin to retain.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but the drama felt manufactured and the big moment feeling they were going for doesn’t work when the company debuted three months before this. The match wasn’t bad but Truth wasn’t the kind of guy you want working a match like this. The Siaki interference was as obvious as you can get as well.

BG James comes out to talk trash about Killings for no apparent reason. This brings out Jarrett because he has to end the show but Hall and Waltman make the save to close us out.

Overall Rating: D. This didn’t work at all for the most part. We had a mindless spot fest to start and then a pretty boring feature match for the tag titles. On top of that we have a just ok main event and WAY too much Brian Lawler. When you combine that with the stupid boxing and Bruce stuff, this wasn’t that entertaining. They need a story and they need it soon.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Some good stuff on this one.

DISC ONE:

Simplistic Yet Brilliant

Bret Hart vs. Hakushi
In Your House • May 14, 1995

Intercontinental Championship Match
Jeff Jarrett vs. Shawn Michaels
In Your House • July 23, 1995

Hey Yo

Intercontinental Championship Match
Razor Ramon vs. Dean Douglas
In Your House • October 22, 1995

Arkansas Hog Pen Match
Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Henry O. Godwinn
In Your House • December 17, 1995

A Sloppy Masterpiece?

WWE Championship Match
Bret Hart vs. British Bulldog
In Your House • December 17, 1995

DISC 2

Mankind vs. Undertaker, Buried Alive Match

Memories Flooding Back

No Holds Barred Match for the WWE Championship
Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel
In Your House: Good Friends, Better Enemies • April 28, 1996

WWE Championship Match
Shawn Michaels vs. Mankind
In Your House: Mind Games • September 22, 1996

That’s Why They Play The Game

Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley
In Your House: Buried Alive • October 20, 1996

Buried Alive Match
The Undertaker vs. Mankind
In Your House: Buried Alive • October 20, 1996

Crowning a New Champion

Four Corners Match for the Vacant WWE Championship
Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart vs. Vader vs. The Undertaker
In Your House: Final Four • February 16, 1997

DISC 3

Back in the Saddle

10-Man Tag Team Match
The Hart Foundation vs. Steve Austin, Ken Shamrock, Goldust & The Legion of Doom
In Your House: Canadian Stampede • July 6, 1997

Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker
Ground Zero: In Your House • September 7, 1997

A Slobberknocker

Non-Sanctioned 8-Man Tag Team Match
Stone Cold Steven Austin, Owen Hart, Cactus Jack & Chainsaw Charlie vs. HHH, The New Age Outlaws & Savio Vega
No Way Out of Texas: In Your House • February 15, 1998

WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Stone Cold Steve Austin & The Undertaker vs. Mankind & Kane
Fully Loaded: In Your House • July 26, 1998

Intercontinental Championship Match
Ken Shamrock vs. Mankind
Judgment Day: In Your House • October 18, 1998

Victory at All Costs

Last Man Standing Match for the WWE Championship
The Rock vs. Mankind
St. Valentine’s Day Massacre • February 14, 1999

A Trip Down Memory Lane

BLU-RAY EXCLUSIVES

Todd Pettengill Outtakes

In Your House Sweepstakes Winner

#1 Contenders Match
Bret Hart vs. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin
In Your House: Revenge of the ‘Taker • April 20, 1997

Match to crown first WWE Light Heavyweight Champion
Taka Michinoku vs. Brian Christopher
D-Generation X: In Your House • December 7, 1997

WWE Championship Match
Shawn Michaels vs. Ken Shamrock
D-Generation X: In Your House • December 7, 1997

D’Lo Brown vs. X-Pac
Fully Loaded: In Your House • July 26, 1998

Spring Stampede 1994
Date: April 17, 1994
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 12,200
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

Again, just trying to complete 1994. This is about one thing: Flair vs. Steamboat. One day I’ll get to their epic three match series and explain why they’re so freaking awesome. Anyway, Flair kept the belt at SuperBrawl and this is the match he gets as a result.  Other than that it’s exactly what you would expect from this era: bad feuds that no one cared at all about. Hogan would show up in three months and change everything. After that you would have old guys with less talent having bad feuds that no one cared about. Let’s get to it.

The intro tries to make this into a Western theme and no one cares. Oh dang this is the street fight match that I completely forgot about. That match is greatness wrapped up in a nice bread with sweetness sauce on it. Now I’m excited.

Aaron Neville, an R&B singer does the National Anthem. I’ve at least heard of him.

Johnny B. Badd vs. Diamond Dallas Page

He’s a sheriff in red tonight. Yep he looks like an idiot but he’s opening ANOTHER PPV. Is this a sick joke or something? The line of HE’S SO BAD always makes me laugh as I guarantee it’s not meant to sound the way I’m thinking about it. Page is still completely worthless here but whatever. Kimberly always looked great though. Page has money now and is rich so he gives Heenan a thing with his initials in diamonds on it so now he’s loved.

Page is in an armbar and needs to have his mouth washed out with soap apparently. Heenan and Tony get into a stupid argument about stomachs as you can tell they’re not that interested in this either. These two would feud for what felt like ever and it just never would end. This hasn’t been bad but it certainly hasn’t been that good either. Badd more or less botches a headscissors and then dives over the top to make up for it. The top rope sunset flip ends this.

Rating: C+. Not bad but not great. The fans were into Badd so that’s a fine choice for the opener. This was a pair that kept going at it for months and before Page finally lost the final match, Badd went to WWF and got laughed at on WCW TV.

Gene and Ventura talk about a few matches.

TV Title: Brian Pillman vs. Steven Regal

Pillman is a face now having split from Austin a little while ago. I can’t get over that that is Bill Dundee with Regal. They emphasize that this is a 15 minute match just to emphasize that this will end up in a draw. Pillman starts off fast to try to make this better. This should actually be an interesting match to be fair. We’re on the floor now and Pillman is freaking working the arm of Regal. It’s been all Pillman at this point.

Heenan’s mic messes up for a bit but is back now. Just as I’m about to say that Regal is in control again, Pillman gets a quick rollup for two. Regal is freaking SCARY good on the mat as we’re at five minutes. Regal is just stretching Pillman a million ways from Sunday. Why is it always Sunday? I’ve never gotten that one. For once the shot at the crowd makes sense here which is as rare as possible. Basically this is Regal just beating the living heck out of Pillman while Brian sells like a master.

We get down to five minutes to go and you can more or less call the rest of the match from that point on. Pillman busts out an enziguri of all things with about a minute to go. That came from nowhere. And the time runs out and the fans hate it. This was something they did a lot and the fans never liked it at all, much like I don’t here.

Rating: B-. This was Regal just putting on a freaking show out there and Pillman being the challenger of the week. Even still this was pretty good and it worked for what it was supposed to be. Regal was freaking amazing before he got so screwed up.

Sting says he’ll win.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Cactus Jack/Maxx Payne

This is a street fight with falls counting anywhere so call it a hardcore match. This match is more or less epic as they more or less kill each other for about 9 minutes. I’m fired up for this. They don’t even make it to the ring. Well at least Cactus and Brian don’t. How weird is it that Cactus was probably the more normal of those two men? Cactus hits Knobbs in the face with half of a pool cue which at least isn’t metal so it’s a bit more believable.

They have two referees here which is smart for a change. There’s nothing here but violence and they’re living it up out there with it. This is a freaking war with the cameras having issues keeping up with it. Now I know I have a reputation for hating these things, but a few things to keep in mind here. Number one, the stuff they’re using isn’t incredibly over the top. There are chairs, trash cans, a pool cue (a bit of a stretch but not really) and various things they find in the arena.

There aren’t scissors or screwdrivers etc. Second, this is the culmination of a big feud between these guys. Payne and Knobbs are fighting in a souvenir stand in case you were wondering. But yeah, this isn’t just a random brawl for the sake of having a random brawl. They had built this feud up for months but it kept ending in a DQ. The story makes sense to end like this.

Third, these guys can actually work decent matches without weapons. I’ve yet to see Sabu or New Jack do so. Finally, there aren’t any ridiculous spots here to suck the life out of it. There’s no scaffold or whatever. They’re beating the tar out of each other and you get the feeling that they want to kill each other. HOKEY SMOKE!

Foley was covering Jerry and Knobbs came from nowhere with a shovel (Jack’s trademark at the time so it makes sense) and just blasts the heck out of him with it. Sags takes the shovel and with Cactus on the ground, Sags crushes Cactus’ head with it kind of like a conchairto. Payne goes through a real table after it anyway, before it was a clichéd spot.

Rating: A-. This was freaking AWESOME. Like I said though, there were a lot of differences here that made the thing far better than your typical brawl. The main thing was the amount of brutal spots and the total lack of stopping. Watch this match as it’s just freaking awesome. This was brutal now but back then this was EPIC.

US Title: Great Muta vs. Steve Austin

Now here’s something you won’t see every day. It’s post 1989 so Muta is likely going to suck here. Austin is wearing black now and eve has a black vest on. He’s been talking more and even cursed a bit around this time. Keep in mind: HE WAS FIRED FOR HAVING NO POTENTIAL. We get the inevitable comparison of Sting and Muta which really was true. Also for you indy fans that think Danielson is so innovative: Muta was using the Cattle Mutilation when Danielson was about 7 years old.

Muta hooks an abdominal stretch which was one of his big moves actually. Austin was a rising star at this point and a win over Muta would be HUGE for him. It amazes me that Austin so much of a technical guy back in the day and how much of a different style he had in just three years. We get like our 5th mention of Aaron Neville. We get it the guy can sing.

Muta goes insane and scares Austin to death which is saying a lot. I’m in awe here as Austin is chain wrestling Muta to perfection. Make that 6 Neville references. DUDE, no one cares! Parker goes after Muta. That’s just freaking stupid. Muta is being dominated here which is awesome as it’s letting Austin look great.

After about five minutes of getting beaten down, he realizes he’s the Great Muta and this is 1994 and he’s wrestling Steve Austin so here’s the comeback…which lasts 8 seconds as Austin is dominating again. The crowd is ALL behind Muta mind you. Austin uses some messed up leg lock called the Hollywood and Vine. Oh dear. Muta wakes up and just goes insane to fire the crowd up.

The fans know their old school guys…and then they screw it all up by having Muta get disqualified for back dropping Austin over the ropes. I FREAKING HATE THAT RULE!!! The fans rightfully boo that out of the arena.

Rating: B. I freaking loved this thing. Muta made Austin look great here and for once was working himself to death out there at the end with the fans eating it up. Then WCW managed to screw up the entire match with that LAME ending. I hate WCW at times, I truly do.

Dustin says Texas > Tennessee.

WCW International Title: Sting vs. Rick Rude

Oh dear the International Title. This is the last remnant of the NWA. More or less the WCW Title and the NWA Title were the same thing as they were unified. Then in September of 1993 WCW left the NWA but due to a ridiculous legal battle, Ric Flair owned the big gold belt that the NWA had been using for about 7 years. Once they left, the NWA Title and the WCW Title were separate because the NWA sucked.

In other words, there were two titles. When the NWA was out of the picture, they just named it the WCW International Title. They unified them at a Clash of the Champions in like two months or so. Race comes down and says that Vader wants the winner of the match then tries to jump Sting which goes badly for him. This is one of Rude’s last matches actually as he would get injured in the rematch of this in Japan and never wrestle again.

They’re doing a mat based thing here which is odd but fine I guess. It’s weird to think that Rude would be gone so quickly from the ring. Rude hits his traditional chinlock because he’s required by law to do it or something like that. He gets a sleeper and has Sting more or less out and just lets go. Well no one ever said Rude was a genius or anything like that. Sting was so freaking over it’s scary.

He’s the Ultimate Warrior with talent and restraint. That’s a scary thought. Yep the referee goes down just as Sting gets the Scorpion. Race runs down to interfere again as does Vader. Bockwinkle, the commissioner, is at ringside during this. Race misses a chair shot and hits Rude for both the title change and the roof being blown off of the place. Sting was as over as free beer in a frat house here.

Rating: C+. Not a great match but the fans ate this up with a spoon. The big gold belt looks great on Sting too. These two had some good matches just like Warrior had with Rude but a bit better.

Steamboat says he’s ready.

Bunkhouse Buck vs. Dustin Rhodes

This is a bunkhouse match, meaning more or less it’s another street fight but with a Southern name. You’re supposed to wear street clothes to it or something. It was one of Dusty’s ideas so go with that. This is a very slow match and compared to what you had earlier, this isn’t nearly as impressive. There’s a piece of wood that they keep using which is annoying for some reason.

This is a bloodier fight and in some ways it’s better, but at the same time it’s far too slow to really be considered better than the first one tonight. After getting beaten on for a long time, Dustin makes his comeback. He was finally getting the hang of things around this time but it didn’t matter as Hogan came in and cleaned house.

He would be gone in about a year and be in WWF where he had by far the best run of his career. After the Colonel interferes, a shot with brass knuckles ends this with Buck getting the win. This was fun if nothing else.

Rating: B-. This was a fight but it was a different kind of fight. There was a lot of blood and by the end of it you could see that Dustin was very tired which was fine. If this was about 4 minutes shorter it was a lot better though.

The Boss vs. Vader

Rude is ticked that Vader and Race cost him the title. This was supposed to be Starrcade I think but obviously that never happened.Guess who the Boss is. Almost right off the bat, Vader takes a HARD whip into the railing. Like I’ve said before, Boss was perfect for this feud as he had the size and power to stand up to Vader but wasn’t big enough that Vader’s offense would make no sense against him. This is a freaking fight. All night long has been physical but it’s been reigned in which is a huge help to it and it’s making the thing work a lot better. Vader is bleeding from the eye. That can’t be a good thing at all.

They’re just punching the tar out of each other here and it’s AWESOME stuff. Boss throws a freaking DDT off the middle rope. I’m into this also if you can’t tell. There’s not a lot to say here as it’s just them beating the crap out of each other with STIFF shots. The Vader Bomb gets two but the Vadersault ends this.

I don’t think Boss ever pinned Vader even though they feuded all summer. Post match Boss goes nuts on Vader and Race with the nightstick. In the back Bockwinkle takes the stick and the cuffs away from him, leading to him becoming the Guardian Angel.

Rating: B. Again, this was far more of a fight than a match but it worked VERY well. The matches would get progressively worse, but the first ones were straight up fights. This worked fine although it could have been better. Just awesome fighting here which never gets old.

WCW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Ricky Steamboat

Oh like this needs an introduction. They fight over a bunch of wrestling holds which gets us nowhere. This is one of those matches that it’s hard to talk about because these two really do nothing but have classics. These are hard to make fun of or anything like that because they’re just awesome. The story here like I’ve said is that Steamboat just asked for a title shot and got one.

Flair was booking and realized there was no great wrestling match on the card so they went with it. There was more or less no chance that Flair was losing here but the match was going to be great no matter what, which is what makes feuds a lot of the time. The technical stuff here never gets old. They started off a lot of their matches like that but as always it was the ending and the middle that set the matches apart from each other.

Just keep in mind: this is the same Flair that was jobbing to Hogan time after time in just a few months. Why was he jobbing? Because Hogan can of course not wrestle for a year and a half and then come back and beat a guy like Flair that can do this and no one questions it. That makes sense right? They fight on the floor a bit and you can see Flair not being as facey as he had been in the recent months. Yes they were turning him heel AGAIN.

Anyway, we go back in the ring and Steamboat is in control. That lasts a few minutes and now Flair is in control. The great thing is that neither option really is better or worse than the other. That’s a rare thing but when it works it works really well. Steamboat hooks the figure four but Flair gets to the ropes. Steamboat is one of the few people that can get away with doing something like that. Finally Flair goes for the knee, and you know what’s coming.

The figure four goes on but Ricky manages to hold on. Keep that in mind as it comes into play later (yes, they use that thing known as psychology here. I know it’s foreign to a lot of people today but nearly 16 years ago all the hall of famers were doing it). Steamboat hooks the top rope suplex and Flair bounces. Both guys are out but it only gets two. The fans are popping for the big spots but other than that they’re quiet.

Not quiet in the when does this end so we can all go home way, but quiet in the this is great stuff way, which it is. Steamboat gets up and both guys look like they could go another 20 minutes or so. That’s freaking impressive. We go back to the double chickenwing which is what Steamboat beat Flair with at the Chi-Town Rumble which was match number one in the epic series.

However, the knee gives out and Steamboat collapses kind of into a Tiger suplex. Both guys’ shoulders are down (the ending to the 2nd match in the series: Clash of the Champions 6, 2/3 falls in a 55 minute classic, which ended with this but Steamboat got his shoulder up then and doesn’t now). Steamboat thinks he’s won the title but instead it’s a draw and Flair keeps the belt. The title was held up and a few days later they had a rematch on Saturday Night where Flair won clean.

Rating: A. In short, this is a match that simply can’t be messed up. They could have a match today and it would be decent. Somehow, this is nothing compared to their three others in the late 80s. Those are coming.

Overall Rating: A-. YES. This is what I’ve been looking for here. Today I’ve watched Beach Blast 93 and December to Dismember. This makes up for those by a long shot. There’s not really a bad match on here. All night long they were working hard and you can see that in the in ring work. This is a very good show and worth going out of your way to see, which isn’t something that can be said that often. AWESOME show and easily the best for WCW for a very long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Super J Cup 1994
Date: April 16, 1994
Location: Sumo Hall, Tokyo, Japan
Attendance: 11,500

This is another requested show from a long time ago. This is one of those shows that you hear a lot about but most people haven’t seen. It’s a Junior Heavyweight tournament held in New Japan Pro Wrestling and featuring some big names, including Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero before most people had ever heard of either of them. This was named show of the year by Meltzer, but 1994 wasn’t the best year for wrestling so it should be interesting to see what’s going on here. Let’s get to it.

After the opening video, we get all of the competitors introduced to us. Here are the brackets. Wild Pegasus and Great Sasuke have byes to the second round and will face the winners of the first and last matches respectively.

Wild Pegasus

Black Tiger

Taka Michinoku

Gedo

Dean Malenko

Shinjiro Otani

Super Delfin

Ricky Fuji

Negro Casas

Hayabusa

Jushin Thunder Liger

Masayoshi Motegi

El Samurai

Great Sasuke

Super J Cup First Round: Dean Malenko vs. Gedo

Gedo is more famous as half of a tag team with Jado. After a handshake they charge at each other and Dean dropkicks him to the floor. Back in and Gedo grabs the arm but Dean rolls out of it. This is very fast paced as you would expect it to be. Dean takes it to the mat and hooks a leg lock but Gedo counters into a kind of cross armbreaker. They trade arm control for awhile until Dean headscissors him into a standoff.

Gedo takes him down and puts Dean in a leg lock of his own, but Dean counters into the same arm hold that Gedo countered into earlier. Nice. It turns into an amateur mat battle with Dean working on the arm while Gedo tries to sit out. Gedo gets up and comes back with offense that looks like an American stereotype of Japanese wrestling. Dean takes him down into a chinlock which is quickly broken.

Malenko will have none of this being on defense thing so he goes all aggressive and rams Gedo into the corner and busts out a Jackhammer of all things (remember that this is in 1994) for two. Gedo takes him to the mat for a very modified STF. Dean makes the rope so they slug it out and collide. Gedo counters a tombstone into one of his own but misses the swan dive. Malenko rams him into the corner again and hits a top rope cross body for two, but Gedo catches him with a powerslam to advance. Dean’s shoulder looked to be up but it counted anyway.

Rating: B-. Good opener here and the crowd was getting into it. Since this is a Jr. Heavyweight tournament there’s going to be a lot of fast paced matches which makes things more interesting. Dean was still young here and full of fire, making this a solid performance from him. I haven’t seen much from Gedo but he doesn’t seem to be anything of note.

Super J Cup First Round: Super Delfin vs. Shinjiro Otani

Delfin has a title which I think is the UWF Super Welterweight Title. Otani rushes him to start and immediately takes Delfin down by the leg. He hooks a modified heel hook/ankle lock but Delfin grabs a rope. Ohtani stays on the leg but shifts to a headlock. Delfin pops up and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker as his knee is suddenly fine. Ohtani is like cool man and spin kicks Delfin’s head off, sending him to the floor.

Back in and Ohtani cannonballs down on the leg Flair style and hooks a half crab. Delfin escapes and finally sells the knee, only to get taken down into a scissors lock. That gets broken via rope as well and a Saito Suplex puts Ohtani down for two, as does a splash. Ohtani dropkicks him to the floor and hits a huge dive, buckling Delfin’s knee in the process. A springboard knee to the head gets two for Ohtani and it’s off to what can best be called a cross kneebreaker. Delfin makes the rope again and they head into the corner for a tornado DDT from Delfin. Delfin ties him up in a complex looking pinning combination for the win.

Rating: C+. The knee stuff drove me crazy here as Ohtani dismantled that knee but Delfin didn’t seem interested in selling it in any way at all. That’s one of the biggest annoyances I have in wrestling, as it’s disrespectful to the guy doing the work as well as looking ridiculous. Fun match for the Ohtani stuff, but he’s a guy I’ve always liked.

Super J Cup First Round: Taka Michinoku vs. Black Tiger

Taka looks very young here and is of course more famous for his WWF run. Black Tiger is Eddie Guerrero under a mask and WAY before he was famous in the US. The winner of this gets Wild Pegasus, more famous as Chris Benoit. Eddie is heel here and takes Taka down fast, hitting the slingshot hilo and a BIG powerbomb for two. Neckbreaker gets two for Eddie and it’s off to an abdominal stretch.

Eddie chops him down and puts on a Sharpshooter, which the announcers call a Scorpion. That’s quickly broken and they collide as this is almost too fast to call. Taka tries a clothesline but it only staggers Eddie, but Eddie’s takes Taka’s head off. Taka headscissors Eddie to the floor and moonsaults off the top back into the ring (Taka is alone in the ring and wasn’t going after Eddie) to pop the crowd.

Back in and Taka moonsaults moonsaults over Eddie so he can suplex him down. Eddie goes to the floor and Taka hits a HUGE dive to take both guys out. Back in again and Michinoku hits a German for two as well as a rana for the same. Another rana attempt is countered into another BIG powerbomb for two. Eddie hits a top rope splash (not the amphibian kind) for two. Taka powerbombs Guerrero down for two and hits a moonsault for the same. Another moonsault hits knees so Eddie hits his brainbuster for two. Eddie is all ticked off now so he KILLS Taka with a tornado DDT for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a very fun and fast paced match. Even though it was just a spotfest, sometimes there’s nothing wrong with that at all and it worked very well here. Eddie was on fire at this point and he would go to AAA soon where he would become a breakout star before heading to ECW and then WCW. Speaking of WCW, the music he left to sounded a lot like what would become the Nitro theme but it was too close to tell.

Super J Cup First Round: El Samurai vs. Masayoshi Motegi

Winner of this gets the Great Sasuke. Motegi has some title with him here as well which I think is the W*ING Junior Heavyweight Title. Motegi dropkicks Samurai down before the bell and knocks him to the floor for a suicide dive. With Samurai on the floor, Motegi loads up a dive but slips coming off the ropes for a laugh from the crowd. Back in and Samurai takes him to the mat and starts going amateur.

A fairly sloppy headscissors gets two for Samurai as does a side slam. Samurai hooks a Boston Crab which is countered into a pinfall reversal sequence for two for each guy. They stay on the mat for a bit until Motegi fights up, only to get tombstoned down immediately for two. Back up again and Samurai hits a kind of reverse suplex for two. Motegi hits a running elbow but gets sent to the floor quickly, with Samurai hitting a suicide dive of his own.

Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Samurai but Motegi takes him right down again with a modified powerbomb. Samurai gets put in a rolling surfboard followed by a dragon sleeper which doesn’t last long. Motegi tries what I think was supposed to be a headscissors but it landed more like a spinning cross body. That gets two and it’s time for Motegi to roll some Germans. Those get two and they trade German attempts. Samurai finally hits one for two, followed by a powerbomb to get the pin on Motegi and advance.

Rating: D+. This was by far the worst match of the night so far as there were a ton of botches. Samurai started with the mat stuff and then went with the flying offense and the latter didn’t work that well at all. The match was full of botches which really brought things down here. I’ve only heard of Samurai and I wasn’t all that impressed here.

Motegi cuts a promo post match but I have no idea what he’s saying.

Super J Cup First Round: Ricky Fuji vs. Negro Casas

Casas, a Mexican, dropkicks Fuji, a Japanese guy wearing a jacket that says Canada for some reason, down to start. They hit the mat with Fuji grabbing a quick headscissors, before being put in an STF to give Casas control. Casas throws on a headscissors of his own but Fuji comes back with a headlock. Back to their feet and Casas hits some kicks, only to be taken right back down by Fuji.

A quick dragon sleeper by Fuji is broken and a backsplash gets two for Casas. Fuji gets sent outside and taken down by a dive from Casas as things slow down. Back in and Fuji hits a top rope ax handle for two. Casas escapes a suplex and La Majistral gets two, as does a Saito Suplex. The middle rope backsplash from the middle rope misses for Casas and Fuji hits a Tiger Bomb to advance.

Rating: D+. Second pretty bad match in a row here. These two didn’t click at all for the most part and I’m not sure whose fault that was. Fuji is a guy I’ve heard of but I’d like to know what the deal with that Canada jacket was. This wasn’t the worst match I’ve ever seen, but there wasn’t much good to it at all.

Super J Cup First Round: Jushin Thunder Liger vs. Hayabusa

Liger is basically divine at this point. Hayabusa immediately kicks him in the head and sends him to the floor, followed by a big dive. Back in and Hayabusa hits a missile dropkick to put Liger down. After a quick chinlock from Hayabusa, he hits a slam and legdrop for two. Off to a leg lock on Liger but Hayabusa’s knee drop misses. Liger slaps on a figure four but Hayabusa grabs the rope.

Liger hits his palm strike to the face followed by a powerbomb for two. He stays on the knee of Hayabusa before killing him with a clothesline for two. Back to the knee but Hayabusa somehow hits an enziguri from his back to escape. Liger sends him into the corner and immediately follows in with a Rolling Liger Kick. Superplex gets two on Hayabusa.

Hayabusa coems back with a running dropkick for two as he’s getting fired up now. Another running kick to the face puts Liger down for two. A senton and top rope spinwheel kick get two as does a moonsault. Hayabusa tries a spinning rana off the top but only gets half of it, resulting in a two count.

Liger gets slammed down and Hayabusa COMPLETELY misses a Shooting Star (Liger’s signature move), with only his legs hitting Liger after Hayabusa had stopped moving at all. Thankfully Liger doesn’t sell it and hits the Liger Bomb for two. Liger loads up a superplex but gets knocked off. Hayabusa jumps into a powerbomb and a fisherman’s buster gets the pin to complete the second round with Liger advancing.

Rating: C-. Hayabusa was fun to watch but DANG did he miss some spots. He would eventually snap his neck like a twig and be forced to retire in 2001. Liger on the other hand is probably the most famous Japanese wrestler in America other than maybe Great Muta, so I think we know who the more successful one was. This would have been way better if Hayabusa didn’t botch stuff so badly.

We recap the first round, so here are the updated brackets:

Wild Pegasus

Black Tiger

Gedo

Super Delfin

Ricky Fuji

Jushin Thunder Liger

El Samurai

The Great Sasuke

Super J Cup Quarter-Finals: Super Delfin vs. Gedo

Delfin grabs the leg to start and tries a half crab but Gedo reverses into one of his own. That doesn’t work that well so Gedo chops him down and shouts a lot. Delfin pops up and chops Gedo down before shouting just like Gedo. Delfin speeds things up but Gedo dropkicks him down. Gedo dropkicks Delfin right back down, only to be sent to the floor for his efforts.

Back in and Delfin pounds away in the corner but gets atomic dropped out. Gedo hooks a quick chinlock but gets rammed into the buckle to break the hold. They chop it out and Delfin knocks him to the floor where he takes Gedo out with a big dive off the top. Back in and a victory roll gets a bad looking two for Delfin. By bad I mean the referee stopped counting because Gedo didn’t kick out in time.

Gedo knocks him down and a moonsault gets two. A crucifix gets two for Delfin and the referee did it AGAIN. Delfin hits a German for two followed by a top rope elbow for two. Tornado DDT looks to finish for Delfin, but Gedo rolls him up for the pin. This time the referee counted three even though Delfin’s shoulder looked to be up.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t working for me either. Again it wasn’t that bad, but it just wasn’t that good. The refereeing was horrible here as the guy was missing almost everything the entire time, or at least the second half of the match. Nothing much to see here but we have something up next that might be a bit better.

Super J Cup Quarter-Finals: Wild Pegasus vs. Black Tiger

In other words, Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero. Benoit takes him to the mat by the leg and cranks on it a bit but Eddie takes him down almost immediately as well. They fight over the leg and Eddie takes over before hitting a slingshot hilo for two. He hooks a kind of triangle choke on Benoit for a bit but Chris gets up again. Benoit grabs a reverse suplex and both guys are down again.

Benoit tries to suplex him to the floor but Eddie blocks it. That’s fine by Benoit who snaps off a German and follows it up by a knee to the ribs. Eddie gets draped over the top rope in a move Benoit often used. Bridging German gets two for Benoit and the fans seem pleased. A big powerbomb (popular move tonight) gets two for Chris as does a snap suplex. Benoit hooks on the same kind of choke that Eddie had on earlier to slow things down.

Back up and Benoit tries another knee to the ribs but Eddie hooks a rollup for two. A clothesline and German get two each for Guerrero and it’s camel clutch time. Eddie goes up (these holds don’t last nearly as long as they do in America) but misses a missile dropkick. Benoit grabs a test of strength grip and Eddie is in trouble.

Actually scratch that as Eddie runs the ropes while holding Benoit’s hand, slips, catches himself, and then hits a rana for two. Top rope rana gets two for Eddie as the fans are getting into this. Brainbuster looks to set up a tornado DDT from Eddie but Benoit shoves him off. Benoit loads up something on the top but Eddie shoves him off. Eddie dives at Benoit but gets caught in a powerslam/arm drag to the mat for the pin for Benoit.

Rating: B. Eddie vs. Benoit is a good match. Gee who would have seen that coming? This wasn’t a classic or anything and I remember two distinctly better matches that they’ve had in the past, but still you can’t go wrong with this pairing. Eddie was looking great here but Benoit was on fire and wasn’t going to lose here no matter what Guerrero threw at him.

Super J Cup Quarter-Finals: The Great Sasuke vs. El Samurai

This should be good. Sasuke is a legendary junior heavyweight and can fly with the best of them. After about 30 seconds of circling each other they lock up. Sasuke takes him to the mat and works over the leg but can’t get a half crab. Samurai hooks a hammerlock but gets caught in a leg lock on the mat. Samurai counters that into an attempted cross armbreaker but Sasuke is blocking most of it. Sasuke grabs the leg right back again but Samurai escapes into a standoff.

Now Samurai grabs Sasuke’s leg in a reversal of roles. Samurai takes him to the mat and ties up the legs before adding a butterfly lock on top of it. That looked awesome. Sasuke heads to the floor and is hurting all over. Back into the ring and Samurai hooks a stump puller. Sasuke grabs a rope and heads to the floor again to cool things off. Back in and Samurai takes him right back down in a headscissors with an armbar which appears to be a signature move for him.

Sasuke breaks that and sends Samurai to the floor. In a cool looking visual, all of the photographers run to Samurai so they can see Sasuke hit a cartwheel into a moonsault to the floor. Back in and Sasuke kicks Samurai’s head off for two. Samurai will have none of that though and puts Sasuke on the floor, followed by a huge flip dive to take out the Great one. Back in Samurai hits a German for two. The crowd is losing it more and more on each of these moves.

A flying headbutt gets two for Samurai and he’s getting frustrated. Sasuke snaps off a rana for two and goes up, but Samurai stops him. Samurai can’t slam him down though and gets caught in a sunset flip off the top for two. Back in the ring and Sasuke misses a spinwheel kick. Samurai powerbombs Sasuke down but it only gets two. Sasuke is getting fired up now and he rolls through a rana from Samurai for the pin.

Rating: B+. This was a very solid match all around with at least two distinct parts. They had the back and forth submission stuff to start and then they busted out the big spots and near falls, all of which were getting better and better each time. I can see why Sasuke is considered so great. Good stuff here and Samurai looked WAY better here than he did in the first match.

Sasuke says something that I can’t understand.

Super J Cup Quarter-Finals: Jushin Liger vs. Ricky Fuji

They fight for control to start and Fuji grabs a wristlock. Liger hits a monkey flip to escape and it’s a standoff. A test of strength goes badly for Fuji and it’s another standoff. Liger gets sent to the floor where Fuji hits a pescado and powerbomb to take over. Liger comes back with a kick to the chest and another to the head to take over. They head back to the floor and Liger drops a double stomp to the chest/stomach. FREAKING OW MAN!

Back inside and a rolling Liger Kick followed by a slam gets two. A release German puts Fuji down and Liger tries a superplex, only to have Fuji kind of fall on him for a cross body. Liger gets sent to the floor and Fuji hits a baseball slide. Back in and a release German gets two on Liger. Fuji goes up but gets shoved down and Liger hits a top rope rana for the pin to make the final four.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but Fuji was kind of a mess. At the end of the day though, it’s Jushin Thunder Liger in 1994 and it’s going to take someone awesome to beat him. Not a horrible match or anything here but Liger was in need of some better competition out there. That would come in the next match.

Remaining participants:

Wild Pegasus

Gedo

Jushin Liger

Great Sasuke

Fuji says something.

Super J Cup Semi-Finals: Gedo vs. Wild Pegasus

Neither guy can connect with anything flashy to start so they slap it out a bit. Benoit hits a neckbreaker for two followed by a middle rope legdrop for the same. Gedo hits a shoulder block and slaps on a double arm trap submission hold. Something like a piledriver gets two for Gedo and it’s chinlock time. That’s followed by another chinlock to mix things up. They get up and chop it out and you know Benoit is winning that.

Gedo dropkicks him to the floor and mostly misses a moonsault press to the outside. Powerslam and northern lights get two for Gedo but a falling headbutt (literally, he fell) misses Benoit. They both try Germans but Benoit settles for a bad powerbomb for two. A better version sets up a good falling headbutt from Benoit for the pin to send him to the finals.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but dang some of Gedo’s stuff wasn’t clicking at all. Benoit was never in any real trouble, which brought things down a bit. Still though, the match was pretty fast paced and entertaining which is the right idea. Gedo was just a stop on the road for Benoit and the match was too short to mean anything. Decent though.

Gedo talks.

Super J Cup Semi-Finals: The Great Sasuke vs. Jushin Thunder Liger

This is going to be awesome by definition. They fight for control to start and Sasuke gets him down by the leg. Liger rolls out and it’s a standoff. Jushin throws on a reverse surfboard but Sasuke grabs the arm to escape. He can’t get the armbreaker so they trade submissions for awhile until Liger hooks a kind of surfboard followed by the full on version. I still love that move. Liger cranks that up even more by keeping their legs up and hooking a dragon sleeper on top of it. FREAKING OW MAN!

Liger puts on a camel clutch and cranks on that sucker. The rolling Liger Kick hits and Sasuke is in big trouble. Liger kills him with a tombstone and throws on a crossface chickenwing to further punish Sasuke. Sasuke kind of falls out of that so Liger CRANKS on the arm with whatever evil ideas he can come up with. Yeah Liger is heel here. There’s the cross armbreaker to Sasuke whose arm looks like jelly. This is total dominance so far.

Liger suplexes him down again and Sasuke is barely moving. Jushin goes up but Sasuke dropkicks him out of the air, sending him out to the floor. Sasuke hits a SWEET Asai Moonsault to take Liger out. Liger gets sent into the post from the apron so Sasuke hits a GREAT Swanton Dive to a standing Liger to take him down again. Back in and Sasuke drops some knees, followed by a spinwheel kick for two.

Sasuke hits a piledriver to put Liger down for two and a big old powerbomb gets the same. Now it’s Liger that can barely move. Sasuke tombstones him down but the Swanton Bomb misses. Liger hits the running palm strike for two and he’s getting frustrated. LigerBomb gets two as does a top rope rana, but Liger poses too much and gets rolled up for two. A release German gets two for Liger as does his fisherman’s buster finisher.

Liger suplexes him over the top and out to the floor and hits a BIG dive. Back in and Liger is spent from trying so hard. Sasuke gets up to the apron behind Liger and tries a Hail Mary springboard….but he slips and falls flat on his face. Instead Sasuke hits a standing rana out of nowhere for the pin and a spot in the finals.

Rating: A. If that finish had hit, this would be a masterpiece. These guys were WORKING out there with Sasuke taking one of the worst beatings I’ve seen in years. Sasuke is a total freak with these high spots, flying all over the place and taking out everyone in sight. The botches hurt him a lot but this was awesome all the way through. Great stuff.

Super J Cup Finals: Wild Pegasus vs. Great Sasuke

They fight over arm control to start again and Sasuke spins and flips his way out of everything. The fans cheer for Sasuke which they’ve done all night so far. Benoit chops away in the corner but what might have been a Boston Crab is countered. Sasuke kicks him to the floor and Benoit takes a breather. Back in and Benoit takes him down with a triangle choke but Sasuke counters into a modified surfboard. Benoit pops up to a standoff and things reset.

Things speed up and Sasuke starts flying around, but Benoit takes his head off with a clothesline. The Canadian hits a German on the Japanese for two. Sasuke comes back with a spinwheel kick and a legdrop for two. They fight for arm control on the mat as all of the tournament participants are watching at ringside. Sasuke gets up and tries to jump around some more but Benoit runs him over with another clothesline.

Benoit drapes him over the top rope and hits a springboard elbow of all things to put Sasuke on the floor. Back in and Benoit can’t hit his dragon suplex. Ok scratch that as it gets two. Swan Dive gets two for Benoit as does a big powerbomb. Sasuke is amazing at selling this stuff too. Benoit channels his inner Hart and slaps on a Sharpshooter (remember this is 1994 and Bret is WWF Champion so it’s a big move at this time).

The hold gets released for no apparent reason so Benoit hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Benoit misses a dropkick and gets clotheslined down. He’ll have none of that though and snaps off a great German suplex for two. Dragon suplex is countered into a rollup for two and Sasuke kicks him to the floor. In a SWEET move, Sasuke cartwheels towards the ropes and hits a spinning backflip over the top to the floor to take Benoit out.

They head back inside and Sasuke hits a German of his own for two. A fisherman’s suplex gets two for Sasuke as well but his missile dropkick misses. Sasuke goes to the apron but he suplexes Benoit over the top in a near 360 to the floor. Benoit slides back in but then right back out for some reason. Sasuke is annoyed by Benoit not making a commitment so he hits a missile dropkick to the floor. Back in and Sasuke is limping. Gee I wonder why. Top rope moonsault gets two on Benoit and a BIG reaction from the crowd. Sasuke goes up again but Benoit stops him and hits a gutwrench suplex off the top for the pin and the championship.

Rating: A+. This got five stars from Meltzer and I can’t say I can argue. They beat the TAR out of each other and there weren’t any major mistakes or botches at all in this. Benoit would go on to bigger and better things, but DANG Sasuke looked great. He kept flying higher and higher but Benoit was finally able to take him down and a wrestling move beat him. Great story to a great match.

A big ceremony ends the show. Benoit won a championship in this which may or may not be the WWF Junior Heavyweight Championship. Liger, Sasuke and Gedo get trophies too.

Overall Rating: A. 1994 wasn’t the best year for the big companies so I have no argument against this being show of the year. It runs just under three hours and after about the first hour, the worst match is good. The first hour has nothing bad at all in it and the rest is pure gold. The last two matches are EXCELLENT and are both well seeing. This was a great surprise and it’s available in full on YouTube. Definitely check this one out if you like Cruiserweight wrestling as it’s great stuff.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon at:

It’s a lack of adapting.Last year, Cena vs. Lesnar was arguably the match of the year.  Why was it so awesome you ask?  It was because the match was DIFFERENT.  It was Brock Lesnar massacring Cena in a style that we hadn’t seen in years.  That was a fight rather than a match and the people bought into it in a big way.

Flash forward to Summerslam and Wrestlemania.  Yeah the matches between HHH and Lesnar were intense, but they were nothing we hadn’t seen before.  HHH treated Lesnar like any other monster with the same classic formula: monster hurts face, face loses first match, face comes back to win rematch.  The problem with that is Brock Lesnar is not just any other heel.  He’s a special attraction and capable of so much more, but instead he’s being used to make HHH look good.  Think about it: even if Lesnar DESTROYS HHH in the cage match at Extreme Rules, which match are people going to remember more?  That one or the match from Wrestlemania?

After Extreme Rules, Lesnar will have been back for 13 months.  12 of them will have been spent making the boss of the company look good.  That’s just bad booking all around.

Taboo Tuesday 2004
Date: October 19, 2004
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Well here we are. It’s Raw only here so of course HHH is world champion. His opponent tonight is one of the options: Benoit, Edge or HBK, with the losers getting a tag title shot. The other main event is Flair vs. Orton where it’s either a cage, submissions or falls count anywhere. Flair here goes 12 years between main eventing PPVs which is an impressive feat. Other than that this is a fairly weak time for the company as we’re waiting on Cena and Batista to break through the ceiling but that wouldn’t be for another 7 months or so. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the fans getting to pick things tonight and the wrestlers having next to no control of any of this. This should have always been a three hour Raw supershow instead of on PPV.

The arena is like EMPTY, with the upper half and even middle deck mostly tarped off.

Coach is MC tonight and we’re ready to go. We start with picking what the Divas will wear in the Fulfill Your Fantasy Battle Royal. They’re standing on a huge keyboard which is a nice touch. The options are nurses, French maids or schoolgirls.

Nurses – 17%
Maids – 30%
Schoolgirls – 53%

That’s for later though. The first match we’re going to see is for the IC Title. The winner gets Jericho and I’m not listing 15 people and 15 percentages. Ten of them are bottom of the card guys (Rodney Mack, Rosey etc). We’ll go with the top 3 instead. Coach lists off all 15 just to fill in time. Val Venis was supposed to be in this but was injured so Coach is in it instead.

Shelton Benjamin – 37%
Batista – 20%
Coach – 7%

According to Wiki, the next closest was Christian, but this was a total landslide.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Jericho

This was just after Shelton had come to Raw and beaten HHH in three matches but got hurt. This is his big return. Jericho gets backdropped over the top and might have hurt his back. He was in a big funk at this point as he had no direction whatsoever. He also had the medium length hair and it looked horrible. Running enziguri gets two and the Canadian takes over.

He works on the back as there’s not a lot of direction to this at all. The crowd being painfully small isn’t helping much either, but that could have something to do with the show being on a Tuesday night. Both guys work on the others’ back with Jericho hitting a backbreaker and Benjamin hitting a top rope suplex. I love the Dragon Whip. Lawler suggests that if the bookers had anything to do with it then this match may never have happened.

Lionsault misses but he actually crashes on it in a thing I’m not used to doing. Shelton hits a nice diving clothesline off the top but the Stinger Splash misses. This is getting better but the crowd doesn’t seem to care. Lionsault hits this time but of course it only gets two. Jericho goes up but jumps into the T-Bone to give Shelton the title. Ross and Lawler seem to be the most excited though. So much for that idea. Is there anyone Jericho won’t put over? Shelton would hold the title until June which is the longest title reign since Rock in 97.

Rating: B-. Pretty good match here as Jericho wasn’t prepared for Shelton so he had to do his usual stuff which didn’t work because Shelton knew what to prepare for. The crowd is pretty weak here and it’s not a good sign for the rest of the show. This was a good push for Shelton, even though nothing really ever came of it as he has more untapped potential than anyone in a long time.

Edge says he should get the shot because it’s fair.

Benoit says he’s tired of HHH and Evolution and he’ll stop them.

Shawn says he’ll give whatever he has left if picked.

Benoit – 28%
Shawn – 39%
Edge – 33%

They announce Shawn as the winner before they show the results. This means Edge and Benoit vs. La Resistance too.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz vs. Nidia vs. Gail Kim vs. Molly Holly vs. Victoria vs. Stacy Keibler

This is the schoolgirl battle royal and yes Trish is defending the title in a battle royal. She’s ticked and a heel here. Jazz isn’t someone I want to see dressed like this. Why can’t Lillian be in this? I’ve never been sure if Nidia is hot or not. Gail looks good too. She never meant a freaking thing after her debut though. Molly is growing her hair back after having it shaved at I think Mania. Victoria (Tara) looks great like this. Stacy is perfect for it with the legs.

It’s not over the top either. The crowd is more into this than the first match. Nidia’s top falls off and she gets knocked out. Jazz is hanging on to the bottom rope and Victoria accidentally hits her with a baseball slide to put her out. Gail is out. There isn’t much to say here at all. Stacy gets the biggest pop of the night for doing a Nash leg choke on Victoria.

This is mainly just a way for Lawler to freak over underwear shots. Molly and Trish get rid of Victoria, leaving the two of them and Stacy. This is boring as all goodness. Stacy is supposed to be the big face here and she makes a bit of a comeback but Molly puts her out easily. Trish is almost out earlier but holds on and sneaks up on Molly to put her out and retain.

Rating: D-. This was bad on all levels. I’ve never gotten the appeal of the schoolgirl thing and this was no exception. Nothing came from this at all but at least it was quick. It was boring as tar on top of that too so there we are. At least it’s over.

La Resistance says they don’t think it’s fair to have to fight a team they don’t know of until just now.

We recap Kane vs. Snitsky. The idea here is that Kane got his wife Lita pregnant and then he had a match with a guy named Snitsky who knocked Kane onto Lita and made her lose her baby. This is a weapon of choice match. The video also shows Kane in regular clothes, which is very weird. This also led to the it wasn’t my fault line from Kane.

The choices are chain, chair and pipe.

Lead Pipe – 29%
Chair – 30%
Chain – 41%

That’s very surprising as the pipe had been an important thing in the angle. Also….a chain?

Kane vs. Gene Snitsky

Lita comes down and the chain is huge. It’s something you could have a strap match with if it was a strap. Lita is here and is just gorgeous. When her hair was straight she looked epic. Kane has control here which makes me think this sounds like a game show or something. Snitsky takes over and beats the heck out of him with the chain.

This is the only thing that Snitsky ever really meant which isn’t saying much. It was an ok angle but at the same time it never really went much of anywhere. It’s amazing to think that Kane is the World Heavyweight Champion at the moment. I’m glad to be able to say that too. Ross says that Kane is fighting for air. I wonder if Lita told him to come but he was already there.

Kane makes his comeback but walks into a sideslam. He pulls a Taker and sits up which is one of his signature moves now too. Snitsky is dominating but Lawler says that it’s even for some reason. This is going WAY too long here as we’re already at about ten minutes and there’s no sign of it ending anytime soon. Gene, which is a great name for him for some reason, grabs a chair and hits Kane in the throat with it, somehow not getting disqualified.

Three straight shots to the neck/throat with it and Kane is just about dead. Snitsky actually Pillmanizes Kane’s neck and throat which is a spot you don’t see that often. He starts spitting up “blood” in a good visual and the referee calls it. Snitsky wants a pin anyway and makes the referee count it. How did this guy never get a monster push? Oh that’s right: HHH didn’t want to lose the world title.

Rating: D. WAY too long here as it ran nearly 15 minutes which is the second longest match of the night. The dominance looked great but at the same time this needed to be cut in half for it to be an actual good match. The time is the real problem here along with a lack of the chain. I think they expected the chair to win which explained the ending. Snitsky looked great though.

Kane does a long stretcher job to leave. I don’t think this really led anywhere. Snitsky jumps him afterwards.

Edge whines about getting a tag title shot which he’s held a ton of times.

Bischoff vs. his nephew Eugene is next with the loser having something done to them. We don’t find out the winner until after the match apparently.

Eric Bischoff vs. Eugene

Bischoff is Eugene’s uncle for your explanation. Eric uses the power of martial arts to start which makes sense to anyone who follows tournament karate, according to Tony Schiavone. He feigns injury and kicks Eugene in the head. It’s Hulk Up time and there’s an airplane spin. The big boot and legdrop ends this.

Rating: N/A. Good night Eugene was over at this point. Even I loved him.

Loser Wears a Dress 21%
Loser is the Winner’s Servant 20%
Loser is Shaved Bald 59%

Oh dear. This would be the end of Bischoff’s black hair. Coach tries to talk Eugene into accepting the servant thing for five minutes. And here’s Vince, apparently interested about something. Man Nick Dinsmore played that character to perfection. Vince says that the crowd has spoken so the shaving is happening.

Eugene does the cutting and Bischoff’s face is great. Coach gets put in the dress for no apparent reason. Vince tells him to take his shirt and pants off. I honestly wonder how many other men he’s said that too over the years. The mannequin the dress was on has balls. Vince: “Button that dress up! Don’t be a sl**!” Vince sees the gray roots of the hair and has a field day with it. He totally steals the show here and it’s great.

Raw Tag Titles: Chris Benoit/Edge vs. La Resistance

This is Conway and Grenier for you La Resistance fan out there. Grenier sings the Canadian national anthem in French to waste a ton of time. Benoit’s music finally kicks on to break up the “singing”. This is right around the time of Edge’s real heel turn and he was really getting good at it. He jumps Conway to start and there is no combination that the champions could use to have an advantage here.

I love that snap suplex from Benoit. That’s always so awesome looking. The crowd is, amazingly enough, dead for the most part here. Edge goes out in front of the barrier to argue with some fan that must have said something evil. I think he might not like Edge but I’m not entirely sure.

This crowd is DEAD. They aren’t moving at all and are barely making any noise at all. It’s like they’re working in front of a ghost town. Benoit has barely been in there at all but unless they pop like crazy for him, this match can more or less be considered a failure in the crowd’s eyes. Benoit comes in to about as great of a roar as the opposing team’s mascot would get.

King thinks the most important thing to the champions is to retain their titles. You can’t buy experience and analysis like that people! A depressing let’s go Benoit chant starts up and dies even faster. The referee doesn’t see the tag to Edge so it isn’t allowed. I love classic things like that. And there goes Edge as he leaves Benoit alone. Well alone with three other guys that is.

In the back Edge gets his bag and leaves. Back in the arena, Benoit hits a top rope suplex but can’t cover. Benoit reverses their finisher (Au Revoir) and shoves Grenier to the floor before locking in the Crossface on Conway for the tap out and the titles. Why look at this: champions that aren’t a real team that hate each other. NEW IDEAS RULE!

Rating: D+. This was like 17 minutes long and NOTHING happened. This was supposed to be big because of Benoit doing it on his own but when he’s on his own for like 3 minutes and the champions dominate for the rest of the time, it’s not a good match but rather just boring. This wasn’t good at all.

HHH is mad because he can’t have any strategy. He also doesn’t believe Shawn’s knee is really hurt. That made me smile as I typed it. We then get clips of Shawn’s knee being hurt last night. King thinks he’s faking.

We recap Christy vs. Carmella. The Christy is Christy Hemme and Camella was also in Playboy. They argue over what kind of “match” to have. The options are aerobics challenge, lingerie pillow fight and bra and panties. Also in the Diva Search that they were the finalists of were Michelle McCool and Maria plus two other girls that also made it to WWE.

Coach is still in his dress for this. Lingerie gets over half the vote. There are semi-see through screens for them to change in. Christy more or less strips and Carmella won’t get near the screen. They take forever and a day to get dressed and the whole thing is just stupid. GET ON WITH IT. They’ve spent like 8 minutes getting ready. Finally.

Christy vs. Carmella

Carmella has some plastic in her top in and Christy rips it out. The feathers get unleashed and this is just idiotic. They roll over top of each other and Christy gets a pin less than two minutes in. Move on now.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

This HAS to be good right? Remember that Shawn has a bad left knee. Lawler doesn’t think Shawn is hurt and Ross goes OFF on him, asking if Lawler can think about anything but puppies for one second and acknowledge that the man is hurt. HHH goes to the knee and takes complete control. It’s all HHH here as he just works the knee as much as he can.

We bust out the figure four and Shawn is in trouble. HHH even puts it on the right leg, as in the correct one since it’s Shawn’s left knee that is hurt. He begs the referee not to ring the bell and pulls him down when he tries to. Shawn FINALLY gets the ropes and his knee is pretty much destroyed. And of course Shawn can stand on the knee, but at least he’s not standing straight up. He’s selling it but not as well as he could have.

So of course Shawn uses atomic drops on the bad knee. I get that it hurts him, but how could he be able to stand up? This is what gets on my nerves when they use the HEART justification to explain this. It’s cool once in awhile but when the guy does it for like ten minutes it’s just idiotic. He gets a low blow and a DDT (which is more or less the generic big move for everyone) to set up a top rope elbow.

Yeah my head is hurting again. The fans get into the show for the first time in over two hours as Sweet Chin Music is set up. And here’s Batista for the interference but the kick connects! Edge pops up to spear Shawn and kick off their feud which ran until I think the Rumble. That gets the pin for the Game.

Rating: B. This was a good match, but the selling by Shawn was questionable here. It was like the more HHH beat on the knee the stronger it got, which makes absolutely no sense but whatever. This was solid as you would expect from these two, but seeing HHH use simple psychology (HBK has a bad knee, HHH goes after it the whole time) is a weird thing as these two usually hit 2-3 finishers each to end it. Good match, but nothing is going to save this card at this point.

Bischoff is mostly bald and isn’t happy about it.

We recap the night which takes up like 5 minutes because we have nothing but the main event left to go.

Flair says Orton will never be a legend until he beats him. Orton couldn’t get a title shot while HHH was champion. I kept telling people I wanted an Orton face run and now look where he is. Flair was showing signs of a face turn which never came.

The final vote is for the stipulation here.

Falls Count Anywhere – 20%
Submission – 12%
Steel Cage – 68%

Randy Orton vs. Ric Flair

It’s weird seeing Orton’s arms. Orton used right and left hands back then which is a cool sight actually. Not many people do that and the only other two that I can think of are Sting and Shawn, so if nothing else he’s in good company. Flair goes low a few minutes in and we hit the no rules part of this. Orton is busted and it’s fairly bad.

We talk about politics for some reason as it’s all Flair. Orton comes back and we see Flair’s trunks pulled down for no apparent reason. Is that a running joke in wrestling or something? Flair gets another low blow which is the smart thing to do here as it’s perfectly legal so why not do it? Flair is busted open too. While he’s up against the cage, Orton dropkicks him into it. That was different.

Orton hits a top rope cross body in a nice nod to Flair’s original Starrcade world title win. Flair tries to escape which doesn’t work. Brass knuckles to Orton gets two. Why is he hiding them in a no holds barred match? Instinct of a great heel if nothing else. The old dude gets a chair in the cage somehow but misses and RKO ends it. I love that move and it was awesome back then too as he didn’t jump as high so it was like a Diamond Cutter. They shake hands to end the show.

Rating: B-. Not bad but this was wasn’t anything that special. Flair was game here though and showed that he could still pull off a decent match when he had to. It’s saying something else that they gave him the main event spot. Orton was awesome at this point so of course they turned him heel and then sent him to Smackdown so he wouldn’t get too over. But remember, HHH NEVER played politics at all. Never. Not him. Nope.

Overall Rating: F+. Oh this was BAD. There was nothing at all worth watching on this and almost nothing worth even talking about. Shelton winning his first title could have been on Raw….much like the rest of this freaking show. This show just didn’t work as the angles went nowhere after this because it was more or less a bunch of one off matches. Terrible show and not even worth watching for the novelty.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Monday Night Raw\
Date: April 15, 2013
Location: BI-LO Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

After last week’s bizarre show with the most interesting crowd in years, we’re now in a far different kind of city in front of a far different kind of people. The main story is that Ryback turned on Cena last week to presumably set up a match for the title at Extreme Rules. Other than that we have Ziggler as the new world champion and Sheamus appearing to feud with Mark Henry. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Ryback turning on Cena from last week. Punk is also here tonight.

Randy Orton/Sheamus vs. Big Show

Sheamus starts and is immediately sent back into the corner. He tries to fight out of it but his headlock is countered by a belly to back suplex from Big Show. A hard chop sends Sheamus to the apron but he comes back with some shoulders to the ribs and the forearms to the chest. A top rope shoulder gets two for Sheamus but the Brogue Kick is easily blocked and Sheamus is sent to the floor. Back in and Show chops Sheamus’ chest half to death before getting two off the Final Cut.

Off to a quick nerve hold but Sheamus fights up, only to be caught in a side slam for two. Show loads up the Vader Bomb but Sheamus counters in an impressive looking electric chair. There’s the hot tag to Orton who pounds away with everything he’s got. A nice dropkick sends Show to the apron for the Elevated DDT. The RKO is countered but Sheamus breaks up the chokeslam with a Brogue Kick. RKO finishes Show at 6:10.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. Seriously I don’t know what else there is to say here. Big Show was at a disadvantage and got beat relatively cleanly. You would think that there was a feud for months between these guys but Orton and Sheamus had no animosity here and Big Show lost like it was no big deal, so I guess we’re just moving on.

We look at 3MB interrupting HHH but getting beaten up by Shield.

3MB says they’re calling out Shield.

Here’s 3MB to do just that but instead of Shield, they get Brock Lesnar for a big old beating of the band. Slater gets two nasty F5’s onto the barricade until Heyman comes out to call off the monster. Heyman says that Lesnar is ready for a fight and wants one with Triple H. At Wrestlemania, HHH knocked out Brock Lesnar which proves that HHH is a real man. Brock however doesn’t see things that way. Now the rivalry is 1-1, so we need a third match at Extreme Rules. Since it’s going to be extreme, we’ll make it an old fashioned steel cage match.

US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

Cesaro gets a mic and yodels all the way to the ring. Kofi gets a quick rollup and backslide for two each but misses a splash into the corner. A hard clothesline puts Kofi down and there’s the gutwrench suplex for two. Cesaro hooks a quick chinlock but Kofi comes back with some strikes of his own. The Boom Drop hits but Trouble in Paradise is ducked, allowing Cesaro to hit the big European uppercut for two. We take a break and come back with Cesaro pounding away with headbutts and punches in the corner.

Kofi comes back with the SOS for two and Trouble in Paradise sends Antonio to the floor. Back inside and Kofi gets two before going up top. His cross body is caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a VERY close two but Cesaro charges into a boot in the corner. Kofi tries a springboard cross body but gets caught in the Neutralizer position. They trade some VERY fast near falls until Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise for the pin and the title at 9:25.

Rating: B-. The early part was dull stuff but that pinfall reversal sequence was awesome. The problem here is simple though: we’ve seen this like five times now from Kofi. Kingston is good in the ring and will give you a solid performance every night, but he’s not going to do anything special with the belt, primarily because he’s not going to be given the opportunity to do so. Either way, decent match here.

Kofi says he brought the US Title back home.

We look at Ziggler cashing in last week to win the title. By that I mean they show us the entire match.

Here are Ziggler and company with something to say. Ziggler talks about how great a moment his win was last week but now he needs to top himself. He’s going to start by being better than anyone else ever and not caring about the fans booing him. You show off when you’re better than everyone else, but he backs it up every single night. Ziggler talks about the perks that come with being champion but here’s Del Rio to interrupt.

Del Rio says he’ll get his title back because he wants his rematch right now. Vickie comes out and says the match is starting RIGHT NOW. Alberto is barely able to walk here.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio

Before the bell rings, here are Swagger and Colter to interrupt. Colter says that it was because of Swagger that Ziggler won the title, so it should be Swagger getting the title show. Alberto decks Swagger but as he turns around to face Ziggler. Jack pulls Alberto to the floor and wraps the leg around the post. The Patriot Lock messes up the ankle even more so no match.

HELL NO vs. Prime Time Players

Next week it’s Bryan/Kane/Taker vs. Shield from London. Bryan and Titus start things off with the hard kicks to O’Neal’s chest for two. Young comes in and has some better luck, allowing him to take over on Bryan. Back to Titus for a fall away slam before it’s back to Young for a chinlock. Bryan fights up for the hot tag to Kane who cleans house and gets two off a side slam. The top rope clothesline gets two so it’s the chokeslam to set up the top rope headbutt for the pin at 3:32.

Rating: D+. This is one of those matches that I never need to see again. We get it: the champions can beat up the Players and can beat them in about four minutes no matter what disadvantage they may be at. I know this because I’ve seen it happen about eight times now. Nothing to see here other than the champions on TV as usual.

Ryback (not even in the arena) talks about how Wrestlemania was the greatest night of Cena’s career and the worst night of his own. Cena could only go down and Ryback could only go up. We get a clip of the beatdown last week and Ryback says he wasn’t going to wait at the bottom of the ladder anymore after everything he had been through. Ryback talks about Cena giving Ryback his title shot when he was injured.

It made Ryback feel like he belonged but a promise of friendship from Cena is just a guarantee to sit in the backseat. Ryback talks about how Cena left him alone as we see clips of Shield destroying him over the last few months. We see Cena eliminating Ryback to win the Rumble and then Cena leaving Ryback alone to fight Shield and give up the pinfall because Cena had his title shot at Wrestlemania already. Last week Ryback waited for Cena to mention him but it never came, so it’s time for Ryback to step out of Cena’s shadow.

R-Truth vs. Wade Barrett

Non-title here. Barrett pounds away to start but Truth comes back with a side kick to the face. Barrett shrugs it off and puts Truth on the top rope before pounding away on the chest. Off to a seated abdominal stretch before Truth fights up and hits some clotheslines. The ax kick misses but Little Jimmy hits for the pin at 3:02.

Rating: D. Not that this means anything because there’s a battle royal on Main Event for the #1 contendership. It also doesn’t help that one of Barrett’s finishing moves is basically the same thing as taking a Little Jimmy, so the ending was kind of confusing. Also, is there a point to Barrett having the title anymore? He’s lost twice in 8 days as champion now.

Teddy Long comes in to see Brad Maddox and Vickie Guerrero and suggests Swagger vs. Ziggler tonight. Apparently it’s happening later.

Great Khali/Santino Marella vs. Rhodes Scholars

The Scholars talk about being dwarfs on the shoulders of giants on the way to the ring. Sandow and Khali start things off with the giant hitting a loud chop in the corner. Off to Cody who wants and gets Santino. Rhodes takes over and pounds away before bringing in Damien for more of the same. There’s the Wind-Up Elbow for two but Santino makes his comeback with the usual. The Cobra takes down Sandow but Cody bails to the floor. Hornswoggle hits him in the ribs with a mini Cobra to no effect so Khali steps in for the save. During the distraction, Sandow rolls up Marella for the pin at 3:19.

Rating: D+. Just a quick little tag match here as we try to give the Scholars some credibility after losing for so many months on end. If nothing else their characters are still almost perfect, which is more than you can say about most people in the company today. Also, it’s REALLY nice to see some random teams like Santino and Khali. WWE has such a huge roster so it’s nice to see them use it once in awhile.

Jerry is in the ring and shows us a video of people Fandangoing around the world over the last week. This actually has become a popular trend at the moment. Fandango and his chick come out and dance for a bit before cutting Jerry off during the interview attempt. Fandango asks how Lawler’s hips feel.

He asks if some fans want to go Fandangoing but since this is South Carolina, most fans don’t seem interested. Before they can do it though, the fans have to pronounce his name correctly. He leads them in a pronunciation and the fans sing the song again. Fandango decides they can’t say his name so they can go Fandango themselves.

Cena says he’ll be in the ring if Ryback wants to come see him tonight.

Jack Swagger vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title again. Swagger pounds him into the corner to start so the champion slaps him. Dolph runs to the floor and jumps Swagger as he comes back in. A big boot puts Dolph down though and some knees in the corner have him in trouble. Dolph gets an elbow up in the corner and takes Swagger down with a neckbreaker for no cover. The Patriot Lock is escaped but Jack manages to crotch Ziggler on the top rope as we take a break.

Back with Swagger going shoulder first into the post and a small package getting two for Dolph. The running Vader Bomb hits the champion’s feet and Ziggler makes his comeback. A dropkick and the jumping DDT get two but the Fameasser is countered into a powerbomb position. Swagger drops Ziggler back onto the top rope and gets the quick pin at 9:57.

Rating: C. This match wasn’t half bad until the STUPID ending. I can’t stand this concept of making the champion lose to get someone into the title hunt. You know an easier way to do this? Have Swagger in control and have Del Rio come out for the DQ. Ziggler doesn’t get pinned, Swagger can claim he had the match won, and we get the same result. But hey, why do that when we can just job the champion who has the stigma of being a glorified jobber already?

Post match Alberto pops up and beats up Swagger, putting him in the armbreaker over the stage.

Mark Henry attacks Sheamus again in the back.

Here’s Punk with something to say. The fans chant for Punk in one of the few reactions of the night. Punk doesn’t say anything for a bit before saying he couldn’t enjoy his 434 days as champion because he was always looking around the corner. He wanted that next challenge and found it in the Rock. After that he went after the one that that could be bigger than the title he loved by going after the Streak at Wrestlemania. We get dueling Undertaker/CM Punk chants from the crowd as Punk looks sad. Punk hugs Heyman and walks away beneath the Titantron.

Booker is annoyed at Teddy in the back and makes Ziggler vs. Del Rio vs. Swagger in a triple threat,, presumably at Extreme Rules.

Kaitlyn vs. Nikki Bella

Kaitlyn shoves her around to start and then out to the floor. A baseball slide puts both Bellas down but Kaitlyn is sent into the apron a few times. Back in and Nikki stands on Kaitlyn’s hair as Jerry talks about one Bella being larger than the other. Off to a chinlock for a bit until Kaitlyn fights back with some shoulder blocks. The gutbuster hits but we get Twin Magic, allowing Brie to send Kaitlyn into the ropes for the pin at 5:09.

Rating: D-. The Bellas looked hot and that’s about it. The Twin Magic thing has been done so many times already, but now that one has a double D cup and the other is maybe ¼ of that makes it REALLY difficult to buy as a finish. Then again this is the same company that said Ax and Smash were impossible to tell apart so this is easier to believe.

Sheamus/Orton vs. Big Show/Henry on Smackdown. Should be good.

Here’s Cena to call out Ryback. The monster comes out a few seconds later and Cena says he isn’t shaking in his boots. He says he issued an open challenge last week to any WWE Superstar but instead of coming at him like a man, Ryback waited to come at him when his back was turned. For some reason we cut to the Shield in the back as Cena talks. Production glitch I’m assuming.

Anyway, Cena says that earlier tonight Ryback made us sit through a highlight reel of excuses. There shouldn’t be any excuses though because Ryback should be standing on his own feet. The things Ryback is lacking is something between his ears and something between his legs, not help from Cena. The champion gets ready to fight and they get in each others’ faces, but Ryback walks away. With Cena alone in the ring, here’s Shield. The announcers keep saying it’s 3-2 but Shield only goes after Cena. Ryback just watches as Cena is beaten down and hit with the TripleBomb. Shield stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Let’s see: World, Intercontinental and Divas Champions all get pinned, Fandango is WASTED, and we’re getting HHH vs. Lesnar III when no one even wanted to see a second one. This was one of those shows where there’s good stuff but the bad stuff makes you shake your head so much that you don’t even remember the good. I don’t know if this was some kind of bizarre punishment for last week or what, but it’s REALLY stupid on a lot of counts.

Results

Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Big Show – RKO

Kofi Kingston b. Antonio Cesaro – Trouble in Paradise

HELL NO b. Prime Time Players – Headbutt to Young

R-Truth b. Wade Barrett – Little Jimmy

Rhodes Scholars b. Santino Marella/Great Khali – Rollup to Marella

Jack Swagger b. Dolph Ziggler – Powerbomb into a jackknife

Nikki Bella b. Kaitlyn – Clothesline into the middle rope

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

The top five is perfect.  The rest…..uh yeah.

1. Roddy Piper
2. Ric Flair and the Four Horsemen
3. Mr. McMahon
4. Ted DiBiase
5. Hollywood Hogan
6. HHH
7. Superstar Billy Graham
8. Bobby Heenan
9. Gorgeous George
10. Jake Roberts
11. Rick Rude
12. JBL
13. The Fabulous Freebirds
14. The Original Sheik
15. Chris Jericho
16. Sherri Martel
17. Mr. Perfect
18. Killer Kowalski
19. Jim Cornette
20. Edge
21. Freddie Blassie
22. Undertaker
23. Sgt. Slaughter
24. Harley Race
25. Vader
26. Nick Bockwinkel
27. Paul Orndorff
28. Fabulous Moolah
29. Raven
30. Jerry Lawler
31. Kevin Sullivan
32. Randy Orton
33. Terry Funk
34. Abdullah the Butcher
35. Paul Heyman
36. Ivan Koloff
37. Ernie Ladd
38. CM Punk
39. Dudley Boyz
40. Don Muraco
41. Kane
42. Brock Lesnar
43. Eddie Guerrero
44. Eric Bischoff
45. Andre the Giant
46. Iron Sheik
47. Mark Henry
48. Vickie Guerrero
49. Randy Savage
50. Batista

Harley Race being 12 spots below JBL is laughable.  Also, where in the world are Jimmy Hart and Shawn Michaels?

Lockdown 2007
Date: April 15, 2007
Location: Family Arena, Saint Charles, Missouri
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

Back to TNA now for a show that apparently holds the record for highest PPV attendance. This is the usual deal where everything is in a cage. The main event is Lethal Lockdown, which is their version of WarGames. The teams tonight are Team Cage vs. Team Angle which is a feud that went on forever. Anyway let’s get to it.

The opening video is about prisons. Makes sense. It shifts into a video about how deadly the main event is.

Lethal, who is pretty freshly Black Machismo, as in he started it ten days earlier, says he’s going to win the title tonight.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Jay Lethal vs. Alex Shelley vs. Shark Boy

Sabin is champion and this is an Xscape match, as in first one out is the winner. They tried this a bunch of times but they screwed it up by having like ten people in it. Five is about perfect. Lethal has Nash with him. The cage is kind of different as it looks like the old cage with the squares in the walls, but they’re a lot smaller. I like it. And they have to tag. What exactly are the rules for this thing? That’s not worth letting us know, because we need to talk about the main event.

Dutt and Sabin start. If I remember right, it’s elimination rules and when you get down to the final two it’s escape only. Hey I’m right. Sabin and Shelley try to cheat but Sabin has to put the brakes on. Dutt does his flips but gets placed on the top rope. Sabin sets for a superplex but Shark Boy walks the ropes and tags himself in for a three man Tower of Doom.

Sharky vs. Shelley now and a neckbreaker gets two for the fish. Hurricanrana and a missile dropkick get two. Sabin and Shelley work together a bit more but Shark Boy easily takes care of both of them. To be fair the Guns weren’t a team in TNA yet but this would be their first date for lack of a better term. Sharky tries Diamond Dust but gets caught in a reverse DDT by Shelley. A double legdrop via the Guns take care of him and we’re down to four.

Lethal is in next to a big reaction. Lethal works over Alex but Sabin interferes again and Shelley hits a top rope jawbreaker to put Lethal down. Sabin goes over and blasts Dutt for no apparent reason. Not a nice guy. Sabin vs. Lethal now with Sabin firing off a rapid fire Garvin Stomp. The Guns hit some stuff that would become signature moves over the years. The fans love Shelley.

The Guns beat on Dutt as only they can. Off to Lethal and things speed up again. He fires off a ton of rights to Sabin but the Guns are too much for him. The sequence where they get Lethal on the mat with Shelley having him in a neckbreaker position so Sabin can hit a running dropkick gets two. Dutt tries a springboard double clothesline but slips off so he hits Shelley but the wrong side of him.

Dutt hits an Asai Moonsault press but the Guns are too much for him as Shelley hits a Stunner and crossface style hold. It’s a tag match now and the non-Guns have stereo submissions on. The ASCS Rush puts Lethal down and a wicked Cradle Shock gets rid of Dutt. Lethal hits Lethal Combinations on both guys and the top rope elbow gets us down to two. Now it’s just escape. Lethal takes over and they both climb. They get on the top and both climb down but Sabin gets a kick to knock him into the cage, allowing Chris to drop to the floor to retain.

Rating: B-. This was a very solid opener with the crowd getting way into the Guns. They would officially unite by the end of the month, starting off a multi-year run which is still technically going despite injuries. Lethal would get the title during the summer, holding it for a whopping two days! The Guns would somehow not win the tag titles until 2010.

Team Cage (world champion Christian Cage, Tomko, Steiner, AJ and Abyss) says they’ll win but Tomko and Abyss almost get into a fight. Christian points out that Team Angle arrived separately. They don’t like Jarrett, who is the last member of Team Angle. If any member of Team Cage gets the winning fall, they get a title shot. This turns into Steiner and Tomko arguing about Christmas.

We recap Roode vs. Young which is still going on. The idea is that Young signed a contract with Young after getting screwed by Miss Brooks. This would be probably the peak of Young’s popularity. Young talked about having a friend who would help him and Petey Williams started helping him. That’s not the friend, who would be revealed in a few weeks.

Petey Williams vs. Robert Roode

Roode is the rich dude still. Young is with Roode and gets yelled at before the match. Petey hammers away to start and controls early with speed and stomping. Springboard Codebreaker gets two. Williams does the Tree of Woe spot where he stands on Roode’s balls and sings O Canada. Roode manages to send him into the buckle to shift momentum and I remember why I never wanted to see him get a singles push.

Roode is just totally uninteresting at this point. If you think he’s boring now, today’s Roode has NOTHING on 07 Roode. A SICK clothesline puts Williams down and Eric is just kind of sitting there and doesn’t like what he’s seeing. Middle rope kneedrop gets two. Off to the chinlock. Petey makes a comeback and tries a crucifix for two but he eats cage to break that up. I don’t remember anyone else going into the cage all night until then.

Rock Bottom gets two. Brooks tries to send in a hockey stick but Young makes the save. Williams hits something that we miss as Brooks and Eric are fighting outside. Williams hits a rana back inside as the camera is from above the cage for some reason. The camera goes back to Young so AGAIN we miss whatever Petey uses for two. A dropkick doesn’t hit Roode but he goes into the corner anyway.

Despite that PAINFUL missing dropkick, Roode hits a spinebuster for two. The Canadian sitcom on the floor continues as Roode demands the hockey stick, but Petey hits a cool DDT for two. Now Petey asks for the stick and a few shots with it take Roode down. And Hebner intercepts it because we can’t have weapons in a cage or something. Rollup gets two for Williams. Destroyer is countered and the Payoff (PerfectPlex) ends this.

Rating: C. I kind of liked this actually. Young was wildly popular at this point which shows you how bad Roode was, considering even he couldn’t get over with Young out there. Roode was just so boring and uninteresting that he needed Beer Money or he would have had nothing else to do.

Roode shoves Young post match.

Angle goes to talk to Rhyno who isn’t happy. They have to change the order of entrance tonight. Rhyno doesn’t trust Jarrett but Joe REALLY doesn’t trust him, so Angle should go have this talk with Joe instead.

We recap Gail vs. Jackie. Does it really matter? There was something at Final Resolution, Jackie TALKED REALLY LOUDLY and since that’s the extent of what she does, there’s your story.

Jackie Moore vs. Gail Kim

Gail does look good in those little sky blue shorts. They start fighting on the ramp and Jackie takes over, sending Gail on top of the announce table. Gail gets water poured on her and they haven’t been in the cage yet even though the bell rang. Ok now they’re inside (with a nice view of Gail on the way in) and the fans do not seem to care. Gail goes to escape about 20 seconds after they’re in but Jackie continues to be annoying by making this continue.

Jackie takes over and I always wonder why she had a job. Either way, the American hits a German on the Canadian but Gail pops up anyway. They exchange worthless attempts to go up and Gail gets a sunset flip for one. I think Gail gets sent into the cage but it really wasn’t clear. Gail goes up and hits a dropkick and both of them are down. Kim gets up and goes for the door, resulting in a brawl on the apron with the door open. Gail slams it on Jackie’s face but stays in. Gail goes up and jumps off with a cross body (hitting Jackie square in the face. At least she couldn’t make Jackie any uglier) for the pin.

Rating: D. This was rather bad and not just because I can’t stand Jackie Moore. The cage slamming onto Jackie’s head did make me smile but anytime someone beats her up it’s a good thing. The cross body was bad looking, because that could have been a bad injury to either of them. Still though, bad match.

Bob Backlund, the referee for the next match, is insane and has long fingernails. He doesn’t say he’ll call it down the line.

Austin Starr vs. Senshi

No backstory to this, because I don’t think TNA can explain it either. This went on for awhile and there was something about Kevin Nash holding a tournament which turned into a talent show and the X-Division Title was involved somehow. It made no sense and I don’t think they knew what was going on with it. I say that about a lot of stories, but this was one of the stranger ones ever.

Starr is Austin Aries who is from TV Land. See what I mean by this story making no sense? Backlund tries to keep things civil and Senshi takes over with his high impact stuff. Senshi chops him a lot Starr takes over with a back rake and suplex for two. STO sets up the pendulum elbow for two. Powerbomb gets two and it’s off to a half crab. Some more back work eats up a minute or two.

Senshi comes back with kicks to take over. Starr gets backdropped into the cage and a Capo kick gets two. Austin takes over again because guys of this style don’t particularly care for selling. He hits a powerbomb kind of move out of the corner and uses the ropes for two. Backlund gets shoved into the ropes to crotch Senshi who was setting for the Warrior’s Way. 450 gets two. Starr shoves Backlund and Bob shoves him into a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C-. The match was fine, but I just don’t care about these guys. I have no idea what the point of it was and like I said, I doubt TNA did either. This was basically any match with these two in it that you would pick out of a pile. There were some decent spots, but it came and went and I don’t care. Just not my taste at all.

Joe yells about Angle not letting him know who the fifth man (Jarrett) was. Come find him if you want Kurt. The idea is no one trusts Jeff. He tells Jeff to please cross a line with him because Joe will kill him if he does.

We recap Storm vs. Harris. Storm broke a beer bottle over Harris’ eye so he might never be able to see again. The result: a blindfold match, probably because no one ever watched Wrestlemania 7.

Chris Harris vs. James Storm

They’re both under hoods so they can’t see. Now go have a cage match boys! The chant of Fire Russo starts up immediately. No contact in the first minute. Ninety seconds. Storm corners the referee at about a minute thirty five. Two minutes in and the literally pass with an inch between them. Two and a half and no contact at all. They touch at 2:37 but both miss punches so let’s try it again. Three minutes now and the fans say they want wrestling. They touch again at about 3:15 and Harris tries to go to the mat but that doesn’t work either so they stop again.

Bear in mind, when there’s no “action” going on, they’re just wandering around with their hands out trying to find each other. That’s it. That’s ALL that happens. Harris points to his head with an idea. Or is he saying put the bullet here because my career is over? Anyway he points around the ring and the crowd cheering tells him where to go. Four minutes in and Harris hits seven punches and they do it again.

They get some really basic offense in (as in a knee to the ribs is a high level move) and Harris punches Storm so hard the hood flies off. We get one of the loudest BORING chants I’ve ever heard as Storm slams him but Harris rolls away to avoid an elbow. This is literally almost spot for spot the same match as Roberts vs. Martel back in 1991. Storm’s hood comes off again (Hey Storm: you’re a heel. TAKE IT OFF AND CHEAT YOU IDIOT!) but that could be too interesting so it’s back to the crawling around.

Somehow Storm manages to hit a reverse tornado DDT for two. The crowd isn’t booing now. They’re just silent. Harris counters two more attempts at it and hits a cutter off the middle rope for two. That gets two and Storm tries to climb but Harris uses the crowd again to make a save. They fight on the top rope and Harris does something like a spear off the top for two. Harris loses his hood, hits a full nelson slam….and it gets two. Harris grabs the referee and tries a Sharpshooter on him for some reason. Storm FINALLY CHEATS, hitting the Last Call with the hood off for the pin.

Rating: S. As in Sacrifice. Watch their match at Sacrifice. It’s one of the best TNA matches I’ve ever seen whereas this was just horrible. The stipulation makes sense, but as usual it’s not something that they thought through. The match ran about ten minutes and probably eight and a half was them walking around. One of the worst matches ever, and that covers a lot. Meltzer said it was the worst match of the year and I can’t say I disagree.

Angle talks to Sting who isn’t thrilled with Jarrett either. Kurt checks to make sure they’re all on the same side and Sting says he’ll go with it, but he’ll take both of them out if Jarrett does something out of line.

Daniels does some creepy promo about his purpose or something like that. He has to sacrifice something or other.

Jerry Lynn vs. Christopher Daniels

Lynn jumps him as he comes in as I think this is old vs. new but they really aren’t that clear on it. Daniels gets beaten down quickly but hits a neck snap on the top to take over. Victory roll gets two for Lynn. A leg lariat puts Jerry down and the crowd is being all quiet again. To be fair they have to follow that nonsense from the previous match so it’s going to take a lot to get them back into anything.

Daniels grabs a cord from a camera to choke Jerry. The crowd is SILENT here. Tenay tries to pass it off as the fans are too confused by Daniels. Whatever makes you sleep better at night Mikey. Lynn starts a comeback and sends Daniels into the cage. Rana gets two. DDT gets the same. This match needs to end soon. Daniels backdrops him into the cage but Lynn gets a quick cradle piledriver attempt.

Release Rock Bottom looks to set up the BME but Lynn rolls out of the way. Facejam gets two. The crowd is trying to get into it but it’s really not happening. They both go up top and Daniels hits a Downward Spiral off the top. They exchange near falls and the fans suddenly think this is awesome. I’m not sure that’s what I’d say but whatever. They go up top again where Angels’ Wings and Cradle Piledriver attempts fail. Last Rites (Cross Rhodes) ends this back in the ring.

Rating: C. Yeah whatever. Anyone that has read one of my TNA reviews before knows I don’t care for Daniels and this is no exception. The match wasn’t bad but it was just a match. The lack of a story is really hurting things here because I don’t know why these two hate each other. That and the cage is getting old.

Team 3D says they’ll win their first titles in TNA. They have a WCW tag title and a WWF tag title each. It’s an electrified steel cage match against LAX. Bubba does the talking (of course) and says tonight they win their 20th tag titles.

Quick recap video for the tag title match. Basically it’s an electrified cage match because that’s how it is at the border. Konnan’s idea, not mine.

LAX says the violence goes up tonight. Konnan is in a wheelchair at this point.

Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. LAX

No Konnan to start. This gets big match intros as it’s basically the first of two main events. The lights are dimmed for this so it’s almost blue. Apparently the current going through the cage is only on in certain places at certain times. They don’t have to tag because when the cage is electrified, tagging is pretty stupid. Team 3D controls to start. This is a hard match to call because they’re moving around kind of strangely here, due to trying to avoid the cage. It’s not bad per se, but it’s not the most exciting thing in the world.

What’s Up hits and at least D-Von was very tentative about going up due to being next to the cage. LAX takes over and uses whatever cheating methods they can. D-Von is busted and Homicide’s hand touches the cage to give us the first electrocution in the match. I didn’t expect to have to write that. Hernandez is busted too. He goes up but D-Von manages to crotch him. Homicide is crotched as well and we get nearly stereo superplexes.

D-Von beats up Homicide, hitting a powerslam for two. Konnan has been wheeled out. Whoever wheeled him out beat down the outside referee and gave Konnan some rubber gloves. Hector Guerrero, the Spanish announcer, jumps that guy (we can’t see who he is) and stares down Konnan. Apparently the guy who wheeled Konnan out was trying to get the key to the door. Hector unlocked it and the door is open. It’s hard to tell what’s going on due to the light. Bubba yells at him to hand him an F’ing table.

The delay allows for LAX to get a quick takeover but Hernandez stops to yell at Hector, so Hector slams the door on his head. The double neckbreker gets two on SuperMex. Bubba Bomb gets two on Homicide. Samoan Drop gets two on D-Von. Top rope elbow gets the same. This has gotten a good deal better. HUGE layout powerbomb gets two on Homicide by Bubba.

We get the first big electrocution spot as Hernandez Border Tosses D-Von into the cage and he vibrates like a fish on a fish frying plate. He’s COVERED in blood, which would be more effective if you could see it. The fans aren’t that thrilled with this as they chant Fire Russo. A middle rope elbow gets two for Bubba. D-Von is apparently fine after the MASSIVE ELECTROCUTION as a Doomsday Device gets two.

The table gets loaded up and D-Von is placed onto it. Hernandez puts some rubber gloves on but takes forever to do it. He climbs to the top of the cage but since he took FOREVER, the splash through the table misses. Looked awesome though. The Dudleys take over on Homicide, throw him into the cage, botch a 3D off the cage and then hit the 3D for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. Yes it was bad, but it wasn’t THAT bad. I mean, if you compare this to the blindfold match it’s a masterpiece. The cage stuff was stupid and I’m really not sure what the point of the lights was. Maybe the cage sucked too much electricity out? Anyway, not a horrible match but it was probably way too much for the payoff they got out of it.

Angle yells at JB for suggesting that calling Jarrett was an act of desperation. Team 3D’s music is still playing because they almost immediately cut away. That’s a running thing in TNA: it’s like they’re always running behind schedule.

We recap Lethal Lockdown, which is WarGames which I’m not going to explain again. Basically it’s Christian as champion and Angle wants it. Whoever gets the fall here, wins the title shot I believe. Also Jarrett is there because Angle couldn’t find anyone else. He was totally evil before he left for a few months, but Angle vouches for him. Abyss isn’t sure if he wants to be on Christian’s team but he was basically forced to due to a threat of violence against his mother. No one thought Angle had 5 guys but Sting and Jarrett showed up to fill out the team. No one trusts Jarrett other than Angle though.

Harley Race will be keeping the key.

Team Christian vs. Team Angle

Christian Cage, Tomko, AJ Styles, Abyss, Scott Steiner
Kurt Angle, Sting, Jeff Jarrett, Samoa Joe, Rhyno

Two people start for five minutes, Team Cage gets the advantage for two minutes, after everyone is in the roof with weapons lowers, first fall wins and gets a shot at Christian at Sacrifice. AJ vs. Angle to start. AJ is still kind of an idiot at this point. He tries to take it to the mat but Angle is like boy please. Pretty much just feeling each other out so far to start. Angle goes into something made of steel and AJ stomps away. Off to the chinlock as they’re saving energy for later in the match. Kurt pops off an Angle Slam out of nowhere as the clock runs down.

Abyss is out second and Angle is in trouble. Shock Treatment to Angle and things go really slowly. Remember that there are two minute periods from now on. With really nothing happening in that period, here’s Rhyno who has to pose on the ramp before going to help his partner. He cleans house for awhile and hits a clothesline to take Abyss down. Angle is back up now so it’s a bit more balanced. Tomko comes out to make it 3-2.

The drug addict goes after the guy with alcoholic tendencies and the bearded one wins. Rhyno is busted. Joe comes in third. A lot of these periods are just coming and going with nothing interesting happening at all. Joe beats up Abyss while everyone else is kind of standing around. Down goes Tomko but AJ gets in a shot. MuscleBuster puts AJ down and Tomko takes Rolling Germans. Abyss gets caught in Joe’s Clutch as Steiner comes in to make it 4-3.

Just like the rest of the periods, he beats up all of the partners and hits what he calls the Frankensteiner on Rhyno. Other than that it’s all belly to belly suplexes. Sting comes in to tie it up. Death Drop to Abyss, Splash to Steiner, Splash to Abyss, Splash to Tomko/Styles. AJ tries to climb but Joe chases him, resulting in a SIX MAN TOWER OF DOOM. Ok that was awesome. Deathlock to Steiner but Tomko breaks it up. Christian is the final member of his team to make it 5-4.

Chops don’t work on Sting so Christian gets beaten down. Does no one watch Flair matches? Sting beats up Christian for a few moments and puts the Deathlock on him. Here’s Jarrett to fire off dropkicks for everyone and a Stroke for AJ. The roof is lowered. Everyone stands up and it’s a five on five brawl, rendering the first 21 minutes of this match totally useless.

Jarrett gets a bat but throws it to Sting. Rhyno gets a garbage can in the same method. Total dominance at this point by Team Angle. AJ gets the bat and clubs everyone not named Angle. AJ goes up through a hole in the roof to the top of the cage for some reason. Angle follows him up and Mitchell gives Abyss bags of tacks. Race pops Mitchell for his efforts and the crowd really doesn’t seem to care about this match.

Rhyno gores Tomko through the door as AJ and Angle try not to die by falling off the top of the cage. AJ cracks Angle in the head with a chair and Rhyno goes to the floor also. Steiner goes outside too and Joe dives onto Tomko. There are only four left in the cage. Abyss lays out the tacks but can’t chokeslam Sting and Jarrett at the same time.

Christian takes a double chokeslam from Sting and Jarrett which is a cool visual. Black Hole Slam to Jarrett but not onto the tacks. Angle knocks AJ off the cage onto the people outside the cage. SCARY stuff there. Abyss pours the other bag of tacks into the guitar and since he loaded it up, it goes over his head and Jarrett lets Sting get the pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. This was more or less every Lethal Lockdown match you’ll ever see: there are too many people in the ring, the periods don’t mean anything until the end, and the match is pretty dull until the last five minutes. Still though it’s fun and it does what it’s supposed to do, which is all you can really ask for.

Sting, Rhyno and Joe shake Jarrett’s hand but Angle walks away as the show ends.

Overall Rating: D. The show isn’t totally worthless and awful, but there’s a lot more bad than good on it. The worst two matches, the blindfold and electric matches, are by far the worst with the blindfold one being one of the worst I’ve ever seen. The pretty good main event doesn’t save it and by the time you’ve sat through two and a half hours of drek, the good opener is long forgotten. Not the worst show ever, but it’s certainly not worth watching.

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