Summerslam Count-Up – 2013 (2014 Redo): What A Difference A Year Makes

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

This show was almost universally the Show of the Year for 2013 and I’ve been really interested in seeing how it holds up. There’s a double main event with Cena vs. Bryan for the World Title and Lesnar vs. Punk in Punk’s attempt to get revenge on Lesnar’s manager Paul Heyman for screwing him over back in July. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is making a rare defense here after Rob won a battle royal or something. Feeling out process to start with Dean saying bring it on. They trade hammerlocks until Rob nails a running shoulder and a kick to the jaw. Rob hammers away in the corner but runs into a boot to give Dean control. A neckbreaker gives Ambrose a two count and the fans are split on who they like best.

Dean hits the dropkick against the ropes and puts on a chinlock. Thankfully it doesn’t last long though and Rob comes back with a quick moonsault, only to walk into a clothesline for two. The bulldog driver is broken up by some more kicks to the face but Rollins and Reigns come out to break up the Five Star. This brings out Mark Henry and Big Show to even things up as we take a break.

Back with Dean dropping an elbow for two and putting on a cross face chicken wing of all things. Rob is sent outside and the four seconds have a standoff. Dean goes out to get Rob and winds up getting caught by the spinning kick to the back for two. A spinning legdrop gets the same for Van Dam but he walks into a spinebuster. Dean misses a middle rope elbow but a Shield distraction lets him get two off a rollup. Rolling Thunder sets up the Five Star but Reigns spears Van Dam for the DQ.

Rating: B-. Good match here but the ending didn’t work. What was the point of having Big Show and Henry out there if they’re just going to have Reigns come in with no resistance for a DQ? It really is amazing how far Van Dam has fallen in the last year as I wouldn’t expect him to have this kind of a match today if his life depended on it.

Miz, the host of the show, welcomes us to the evening and runs down the big matches. He would be kind of perfect for this role today too. Fandango and Summer Rae cut him off….and that’s it.

The opening video focuses o how awesome Los Angeles is as well as the double main events. The overblown voiceover really works.

Jojo from Total Divas sings the National Anthem.

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning an Inferno match but you win by pin or submission. It’s also Bray’s in ring debut. Kane hammers away in the corner to start and we get the old school idea of the flames going up whenever anyone hits the mat. Harper and Rowan keep getting closer to the ring but have to back away from the flames. Bray comes back with headbutts but can’t get Kane up for a suplex.

Kane gets sent into the corner for a running splash followed by the cross body to put him down. A bunch of right hands have Kane in more trouble but he comes back with a running clothesline in the corner. There’s the side slam to send the flames up even more, preventing the Family from sending Bray a kendo stick. Rowan tries a fire extinguisher but the flames don’t go out. Kane hits a pair of chokeslams and calls for a tombstone, only to have Rowan and Harper cover the flames and come to beat Kane down. The yet to be named Sister Abigail gives Bray the pin at 7:45.

Rating: D. This wasn’t so much bad as much as it was really stupid. Bray looks like a joke in his first match (though he would have FAR better performances in the future) and the flames are more of an annoyance than the focus of the match. The Family coming in didn’t work and makes the whole thing look ridiculous.

Post match Bray sits in his chair while the Family crushes Kane’s head with the steps. They carry Kane away which never went anywhere.

The expert panel (Booker T., Shawn Michaels and Vickie Guerrero) chat about what we just saw and make some main event predictions.

Earlier tonight Paul Heyman compared Punk vs. Lesnar to David vs. Goliath. He sees the battles ending a bit differently. Tonight’s match is now no DQ.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Sandow screwed over his friend Cody to become Mr. Money in the Bank and Rhodes is ticked off. On the way to the ring, Damien talks about famous teams and says there has always been a leader and a sidekick. Cody has recently shaved off his mustache and Cole tells us we can find out why he has done so on Friday on Youtube. Seriously.

Sandow charges at him to start and hammers away in the corner but Cody comes back with a backdrop to take over. The release gordbuster gets two for Cody but Damien hammers away on him in the corner and cranks on the arms. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two and we hit an old school Edgecator (kneeling Sharpshooter) to Cody.

That goes nowhere either as Rhodes fights up and hits a MuscleBuster of all things for two. A springboard missile dropkick sets up the Disaster Kick but Sandow comes back with a swinging neckbreaker. Cody nails a second attempt at the Disaster Kick for two but Cody misses a charge into the post. Again it doesn’t seem to matter as Cross Rhodes gets the pin on Sandow at 6:40.

Rating: D+. This could have been on any given Smackdown and really doesn’t mean anything. The idea was for Cody to eventually take the briefcase from Sandow but they dropped the whole idea and hooked Cody up with Goldust, which wound up being better for everyone involved. It didn’t last long but at least it was an idea. Sandow has fallen through the floor in a year and Cody is a completely different character.

Video on Christian’s career.

World Heavyweight Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Another match where both guys have completely changed course in a year. Christian is challenging after winning a triple threat a few weeks back. We’re ready to go after some big match intros and some gawking at Lillian in a gray dress. They lock up and head into the corner to start with the champion grabbing a headlock. Del Rio gets him to chase him around the ring but gets his throat snapped across the top rope.

Alberto breaks up a top rope hurricanrana and ties Christian in the Tree of Woe for some stomping. Back to the floor with Christian being sent into the barricade to start the arm work. A release flapjack and a kick to the head allows Del Rio to wrap the arm around the ropes. Christian sends him back outside and hits a big plancha to take the champion down, followed by a missile dropkick back inside.

The Canadian hammers away in the corner, ducks the running enziguri, and gets two off a top rope cross body. The Killswitch is countered into a Backstabber for two as Alberto is starting to get frustrated. There’s a jumping back elbow to the jaw from Christian but Del Rio counters a sunset flip out of the corner with a right hand.

Instead a top rope hurricanrana gets two for Christian and Del Rio is in trouble. It’s not enough trouble for him to get speared though as Del Rio dropkicks him in the face for a sweet counter. The low superkick gets two more for Alberto. He tries it again but gets rolled up for two. Christian finally hits the spear but injures his bad shoulder, setting up the cross armbreaker to retain Del Rio’s title at 12:28.

Rating: B. Good match here with both guys going back and forth until the logical and thought out ending. I love it when you have an old injury coming back from earlier in the match to tie into the ending, even though it’s not something you see often enough. It’s also nice to see a high level guy tapping out to a heel submission, which you see even less often.

Del Rio says he’s the Latino representative.

WWE loves the National Guard.

Video on Axxess from earlier today. Maria Menunos had a match and talks to Miz about how awesome that was. Fandango and Summer Rae interrupt with some more dancing, triggering a dance from Maria and Miz.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

This is the Total Divas match. You can add Natalya to the list of people who have fallen through the floor in a year. She has the Funkadactyls with her while Brie has Nikki and Eva Marie. I’m not sure who has the better backup here. Feeling out process to start with both girls doing their best choreographed spots. Brie slaps her in the face but has to head to the ropes to avoid a Sharpshooter attempt.

Natalya is sent to the floor and caught with a baseball slide to the back as a JBL chant starts up. Now it’s a Michael Cole chant, followed by the required Jerry version. Brie drops a leg and cranks on a chinlock as the fans want tables. Natalya fights up and puts on a quick Sharpshooter but Brie sends her into the corner. The other Divas get into it on the floor and we hit another chinlock from Brie. Back up and a sunset flip is countered into a Sharpshooter to make Brie tap at 4:19.

Rating: D-. Well that happened. It doesn’t hold up, the fans don’t care, and the whole thing is a waste of time. The girls didn’t even look all that great here as most of their outfits looked like they belonged in the 1950s. The fact that Total Divas didn’t get the Divas Title off of AJ continues to astound me.

Ryback harassed a catering guy earlier in the day.

We recap Lesnar vs. Punk. The idea is simple: both guys are Paul Heyman Guys, but then Punk started listening to the fans and asked Heyman to stop coming out for his matches. Heyman turned on him and cost Punk Money in the Bank, so Punk swore revenge. Brock Lesnar returned and laid out Punk, with Heyman eventually revealing that he asked Brock to come back and destroy Punk, despite swearing he didn’t.

Punk is out for revenge but has to go through Lesnar to get there. The title for the match was perfect: The Best vs. The Beast. I love the story behind this: yeah it’s about revenge, but it won’t be settled in a debate or by lawyers or something stupid like that. Instead, it’s going to be scheduled in a professional wrestling match, like every feud should be.

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

No DQ. Punk charges right at him but gets driven into the corner. Forearms to Brock’s head have no effect and he drives shoulders into the ribs. Punk tries some knees to the ribs but Brock literally tosses him across the ring. Brock stomps him down in the corner but Punk comes back with a hard knee to the jaw and a second one to send him out to the floor. A big suicide dive has the Beast down and Heyman is starting to freak out.

Punk gets some steps but Brock just rams them back into his face to take over again. He throws Punk onto his should but gets posted instead, allowing Punk to dive off the apron to drop Brock again. A clothesline off the announcers’ table nails Lesnar but Punk makes the mistake of going after Heyman, allowing Brock to blindside him. Brock picks him up again and LAUNCHES him over the announcers’ table. Then he throws him over the other table and stomps on the top of the table on top of Punk.

Back in and Punk goes after the legs but Brock just levels him with a clothesline. We hit the bearhug until Punk scores with forearms, only to take a hard knee to the ribs. It’s almost total dominace by Brock so far. Back to the bearhug but Punk elbows out of it again. Some kicks to the chest have Brock in trouble but he counters a high cross body into a fall away slam.

We hit the chinlock but Punk bites his ear to escape. More kicks have Brock in trouble and a top rope knee sends him sprawling across the ring. There’s a pair of running knees in the corner but Brock counters the third one into the F5. Punk escapes again and nails a high kick followed by the Macho Elbow (more like a splash) for a VERY close two. The fans are totally into this.

The GTS is countered into another F5 attempt but Punk escapes and nails another high kick. He tries the GTS again but gets caught in the Kimura. Somehow he counters that into a cross armbreaker but Brock rolls over into a choke. Punk counters THAT into a triangle choke, only to have Brock lift him for a powerbomb. That doesn’t break the hold either and it’s back to the triangle, but Brock lifts him into another powerbomb, this time with a running start. AMAZING sequence there and the fans give it the THIS IS AWESOME chant that it deserves.

Brock busts out Three Amigos of all things for two. Punk is half dead in the ring so Brock heads outside and gets a chair. He takes too long though and Punk dives onto the chair, driving it into Lesnar in a huge crash. Now it’s Punk wearing out Brock with the chair as they head back inside. Brock takes the chair away, only to get hit low before he can destroy Punk. Punk nails the Cactus Jack chair drop from the top for two as Heyman is pacing back and forth.

Punk just starts beating Brock with the chair but Heyman gets on the apron for a distraction. Lesnar lifts him for the F5 but Punk grabs Heyman for the block. He slips off Lesnar’s back and hits the GTS for a white hot near fall with Heyman making the save. After a quick chase, Punk charges into the F5 but counters AGAIN into a DDT for another two.

There’s the Anaconda Vice and Lesnar is in trouble, drawing Heyman in with the chair….but Punk gets up and steps on it. There’s a right hand for Heyman and a Vice of his own, but Punk is wide open for a chair shot from Lesnar. A bunch more chair shots sets up an F5 on the chair to give Brock the pin on Punk’s dead body at 29:07.
Rating: A+. I said this was Match of the Year last year and a second viewing affirms that view. This was AMAZING with some great David vs. Goliath stuff, a white hot counter sequence, and then two guys just beating the tar out of each other for ten minutes to end the match. Heyman making the save made sense, but it makes Punk look like the superhero that everyone thought he was. Totally awesome match here and Lesnar looks like the monster that he’s supposed to.

Oh and one more thing: SCREW YOU HHH FOR WASTING BROCK FOR A YEAR FOR YOUR STUPID EGO. Seriously, a year of this lost for that “trilogy” nonsense with HHH winning the big match on the biggest stage before letting Brock get his win back in a totally forgotten cage match. Lucky us.

Punk gets the well deserved standing ovation.

A fan gets splashed by Mark Henry for Summerslam tickets. He gets to sit in front of the announcers’ table for the next match.

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn vs. Big E. Langston/AJ Lee

Two feuds combined into one. The guys start with Ziggler nailing a fast dropkick for two on Big E. Langston comes right back with a belly to belly suplex and a spinning Warrior Splash for two of his own before we hit the abdominal stretch. Dolph quickly escapes and scores with another dropkick before it’s off to the girls. Kaitlyn throws her around but gets caught by a big kick to the face.

A back elbow gets two for Lee and she hooks a sleeper. AJ shouts a lot but gets caught with a shoulder block. Back to the guys and there are the ten elbow drops from Dolph. The Fameasser misses and Big E. hooks a tilt-a-while backbreaker for two. AJ takes out Kaitlyn with a Shining Wizard but Big E. hits the post. Kaitlyn spears AJ in half (I miss her selling the heck out of that move) as Big E. gets back up and runs over Dolph. The Big Ending doesn’t work though and the Zig Zag gives Dolph the pin at 5:46.

Rating: D+. I feel sorry for this match as it was a glorified TV match that had to go after a thirty minute masterpiece. These four feuded for a long time and it was getting boring by this time. AJ would hold the Divas Title for a ridiculous eight more months and Kaitlyn doesn’t even have a job anymore. Again, it’s amazing how much a year has changed.

Miz gets cut off by Fandango and Summer again, finally causing Miz to knock him out.

The expert panel makes their World Title match picks.

We recap Cena vs. Bryan. The idea here is simple: Bryan had been on a roll and Cena was allowed to pick his opponent for Summerslam. He summed it up in four words: “I select Daniel Bryan.” This was the start of Bryan being a B+ player as authority (not The Authority) figures started saying Bryan was just too small to be World Champion. HHH and Vince tried to turn him corporate but Bryan couldn’t bring himself to do it because it wasn’t who he was. The only person that seems to be supporting him is HHH, who is guest referee tonight.

At the same time they actually made it somewhat personal between Cena and Bryan as Daniel called Cena out for being a parody of a wrestler. Cena got very serious and said that he was a wrestler even if he wore bright t-shirts. He chose Bryan because he’s the best competition in the company right now and has earned the spot. Cena also has fluid the size of a baseball in his elbow at the moment and is going to be taking time off after the match.

WWE Title: Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and HHH is guest referee. Daniel wisely goes after the bad arm to start but gets taken down with a headlock. Back up and Cena isn’t sure what to make of Bryan and his technical abilities. John easily wins a test of strength but Bryan bridges off the mat. Cena jumps down on him but can’t break the bridge in a nice display of strength by the bearded one. A YES Lock attempt sends Cena out to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Cena uses the bad arm for a headlock before they hit the mat for the old Flair bridge up into a backslide from Bryan for two. It’s Bryan in control now but Cena blocks the surfboard with pure power. Daniel is sent to the apron and knocked into the announcers’ table with a hard shoulder. Cena is wrestling as the heel here by default as the power guy.

Bryan pops up and whips Cena into the steps but Cena sends him in as well. Fans to Cena: “YOU STILL SUCK!” Back in and Cena hammers away to get the upper hand but lets Bryan get up. A sitout powerbomb gets two for the champion and we hit the chinlock. Bryan is quickly back up with right hands as Jerry reminds us that HHH is guest referee. He hasn’t meant anything yet.

Bryan backflips over Cena out of the corner and nails the running clothesline. Here come the YES Kicks but the big one misses, allowing Cena to initiate his finishing sequence. The Shuffle gets two and Bryan nails the big kick to the head for the same. Bryan finally starts going after the arm by snapping it over his own shoulder and firing off kicks to the elbow. Cena tries a quick STF but Bryan mule kicks his way out. Now it’s Bryan putting Cena in the STF but he can’t crank on it as well.

Cena powers up but gets caught in Rolling Germans. Cena powers out of the third suplex and tries the AA, only to be reversed into the YES Lock. Bryan can’t quite get it on and Cena gets his head out of the grip to escape. That’s fine with Daniel who slaps on the guillotine choke. Again I had to hear Cole say HHH’s name to remember that he was the referee. Cena powers up again and drives Bryan into the buckle a few times before finally grabbing a rope for the break.

An AA connects out of nowhere for two and Cena is getting frustrated. He goes up top but Bryan breaks up the top rope Fameasser. A running dropkick has Cena reeling and Bryan superplexes him down, only to hook his feet on the ropes to stay up top. That’s kind of brilliant actually. The Swan Dive connects for two and Cena rolls outside. The FLYING GOAT is countered by a forearm to the face and the top rope Fameasser gets John another two count.

Cena goes up again but gets caught, only to try to slam Daniel down. Instead we get a TERRIFYING semi-botch as Cena almost piledrives him off the top. Thankfully Bryan’s neck is in one piece (for now) as Cena puts him in the STF. He pulls back too far though and Bryan slips out to apply the YES Lock. Cena is right next to the ropes for the break though and both guys are exhausted.

It’s Bryan up first with the running dropkicks but he tries one too many, allowing Cena to take his head off with a running clothesline. They slug it out again until both guys try flying shoulders and knock each other out again. Back up and they slap it out as the fans are even more into it now. Cena catches him charging and plants Bryan with a spinebuster. Allegedly Bryan countered with a DDT but it didn’t come off that well on camera.

It’s Daniel to his feet first and going up top, only to have Cena counter his high cross body into an AA. Daniel counters that into the small package for two, followed by a BIG kick to the head. He doesn’t cover, but instead debuts the running knee to the chest for the 100% clean pin over Cena (I believe the first since Rock at Wrestlemania) for the pin and the title at 31:07.

Rating: A+. Yep this worked too. This is a totally different style of main event match and it more than holds up a year later. There was a solid story in there of Bryan being as technical as he could be and Cena just muscling his way through it, only to have Bryan knee his head off for the pin. Excellent match, but somehow it’s the second best of the night and of the year.

Post match Cena is upset but hands Bryan the title and raises his hand with no violence.

Bryan celebrates for about three minutes….and here’s Mr. Money in the Bank Randy Orton. Bryan is ready for him, but not ready for HHH to spin him around for a Pedigree.

WWE Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Orton is champion in 8 seconds.

The new heel forces pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. This won Show of the Year and it’s easy to see why. The two main events are more than enough to make this awesome but you also have good stuff like Del Rio vs. Christian. Nothing was truly horrible here (the Divas match was just over four minutes so how much can it really hurt?) and two instant classics make this more than great and one of the best shows WWE ever put on.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original:
Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+
Redo: D

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C
Redo: D+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+
Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F
Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+
Redo: A+

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Kaitlyn/Dolph Ziggler

Original: C-
Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+
Redo: A+

Overall Rating:

Original: A-
Redo: A

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXIX (Redo): Twice In A Lifetime?

Wrestlemania XXIX
Date: April 7, 2013
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 80,676
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s hard to believe this show was almost a year ago. The main event is of course Rock vs. Cena II in the sequel that not a lot of people wanted to see. Other than that we have CM Punk challenging the Streak and HHH vs. Brock Lesnar in another sequel that not a lot of people wanted to see. I wasn’t too hot on this show live but Wrestlemania is always worth checking out. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett is defending. Miz backflips out of an early belly to back suplex attempt and gets two off a fast rollup. He tries to jump over Barrett in the corner though and gets kicked in the ribs to give the champion control. Barrett: “How awesome is he now?” Miz is laid on the top rope and a running knee to his ribs gets two. Barrett loads up his boot to the face with Miz in the ropes but Miz gets his own foot up instead.

The Reality Check gets two for Miz but both guys escape finishers. Winds of Change gets a close two for Wade but Miz ducks the Bull Hammer and hooks the Figure Four. Barrett is quickly into the ropes though and pops up with Wasteland for two. Miz picks the leg and takes Barrett to the mat for the Figure Four and the title out of nowhere.

Rating: C. This was perfectly fine as they wanted to fire the fans up before the show got started. It’s amazing how far these two have fallen in the last year as Miz is floundering even more and Barrett is a one note character. This result wouldn’t mean anything as Barrett got the title match the very next night.

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie talks about Hurricane Sandy hitting New Jersey back in October and destroying a lot of the Jersey Shore. But the people of New Jersey fought back and rose up along with New York because they’re unbreakable and unstoppable.

The opening video talks about moments that change the world forever and how they make time stand still.

I still like the female part of that I’m Coming Home song.

Sheamus/Randy Orton/Big Show vs. Shield

The three guys had been having issues with Shield for months now. At this point, Shield still hasn’t lost a six man tag and Big Show isn’t trustworthy but he’s a necessary ally. Basically everyone thought Orton was going to be the one to turn on his partners here though. Thankfully Shield doesn’t come from the top of the stadium this time. Reigns starts with Sheamus and they slug it out in the corner. The cameras are all over the place as they keep switching angles.

A running ax handle puts Reigns down and a clothesline is good for one. Orton comes in and drops a knee before hitting the Garvin Stomp. Rollins comes in but walks into a dropkick followed by ten right hands in the corner. The fans are WAY into this so far. Back to Sheamus who gets his knee dropkicked out, allowing Ambrose to come in for some fast stomping. The fans are even more into Ambrose but he walks into a powerslam for two. Sheamus goes to tag Orton but Big Show tags himself in instead.

Show rips the vest off Ambrose for the chop in the corner but Dean tries a chop of his own. That just makes Big Show mad so he hits ten straight chops. Dean dropkicks Big Show in the knee just like Sheamus got earlier and it’s back to Rollins who tries to keep Big Show down. Shield starts their fast tags as Cole says they’re like a swarm of hornets. Rollins hits some running knees to the head for two before it’s back to Reigns for a chinlock. Show suplexes his way to freedom but Rollins knocks Orton to the floor.

The giant backdrops Rollins from his knees and the hot tag brings in Sheamus. The Irishman rips the vest off of Rollins for the ten forearms. Ambrose gets a tag and is immediately caught in the ten forearms as well. There’s the rolling fireman’s carry to Ambrose and another one to Rollins who lands on Dean. Reigns pulls Sheamus outside though and the double teaming begins.

Orton is whipped into Rollins to put both guys down but Shield throws Rollins back inside. The Triple Bomb to Sheamus is broken up by a Big Show spear in a nice visual and everyone is down. Show reaches out for a tag but Orton takes it himself, ticking Big Show off. Randy loads up the RKO on Ambrose but has to catch a springboarding Rollins in an RKO. Reigns comes in with the spear though and puts Dean on top for the pin as Big Show watches from the apron.

Rating: C+. It’s amazing that Shield is actually still together a year later and have become even more dominant. I thought they would win the match coming into this and I’m glad the first loss wasn’t here at Wrestlemania. The match wasn’t bad but it didn’t have the time or the near falls that make most Shield matches awesome. Still though, good opener and Big Show was somewhat justified in his actions.

Big Show yells at Orton post match and knocks out both of his partners.

Music video on Rock vs. Cena II with the theme of legacy vs. redemption.

Snooki is here.

Mark Henry vs. Ryback

This is a simple idea: how big of a guy can Ryback Shell Shock? Henry also choked Ryback during a bench press challenge a few weeks earlier. Ryback was on fire a few months before this but has fallen through the floor in the time since. They stare each other down to start before Ryback wins an early slugout. Some clotheslines put Henry against the ropes but he runs Ryback over to a big pop. A powerslam gets two for Henry and we get a Sexual Chocolate chant.

Ryback can’t suplex him but Mark lifts Ryback up and places him on the apron for a ram into the buckle. Back in and Henry pounds on the spine before we hit the bearhug. Ryback is thrown outside but he dives back inside at two. The bearhug goes on again but Ryback fights out and drives Mark into the corner. There’s the Meat Hook and Ryback easily picks Mark up for the Shell Shock, drawing Ryback’s first pop of the match. Henry grabs the ropes though and falls onto Ryback for the pin.

Rating: D. Nothing but a slow power match here though the Shell Shock attempt looked good. The booking still doesn’t make sense to me as Henry would challenge Cena to a title match tomorrow night before Ryback closed the show by turning heel and getting the title shot on PPV. Why not have Ryback win here, have Henry answer the open challenge, and THEN have Ryback go after Cena, saying Henry almost beat Cena (he did) so imagine what Ryback could do. The whole thing was backwards. Anyway the match wasn’t great and they only kind of did the Shell Shock, which was the whole point of the thing.

Post match Henry goes back in to stomp on Ryback some more but the Big Guy fights back and Shell Shocks Henry. Again, why not have that be the ending?

The announcers play with the new WWE action figures. JBL beats up the Rey Mysterio toy in some nice continuity.

Video on the WWE partnering with the Special Olympics.

Some Special Olympians are here with Stephanie McMahon and Chris Christie.

Tag Team Titles: HELL NO vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston

This is Langston’s in ring debut and his team is challenging. AJ is with them as well and Dolph is Mr. Money in the Bank. Bryan’s beard is only a foot or so long here. We get a nice bit of continuity to start with Ziggler kissing AJ on the apron after the bell, allowing Bryan to kick him in the head for a close two. The YES Kicks have Ziggler in trouble but he dives to the corner after ducking the big one. Both power guys come in now and it’s Kane taking over with right hands to the face, only to be caught in a series of backbreakers.

Langston runs Kane over and it’s back to Ziggler who gets two off a dropkick. Dolph doesn’t stay in long as he tags Big E. back in, only to have him get caught by a running DDT. Now it’s already back to Ziggler who walks into a side slam. Kane misses the top rope clothesline but Ziggler almost entirely botches the Fameasser, meaning it’s only good for two. A hard clothesline drops Ziggler but Big E. breaks it up at the last second. Langston nails the Big Ending but Bryan takes him to the floor. AJ throws in the briefcase but misses the big show, allowing Kane to hit the chokeslam, setting up Bryan’s Swan Dive to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. This was more short than anything else. They seemed to be teasing leaving Ziggler fresh so he could cash in later which people were expecting like the birth of a child at this point. HELL NO was a good team and a good stepping stone for Bryan to the main event scene in the coming months.

Make-A-Wish video starring John Cena.

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

This is the dancing feud so Fandango has a full dance troupe with his original brunette dance partner, soon to be replaced by Summer Rae. It’s also Fandango’s in ring debut under this name. Fandango dances to start but is quickly taken down to the mat by Jericho. A hard slap sends the dancer to the floor before Jericho brings him back inside and hammers away in the corner. The fans are entirely behind the Canadian here.

Fandango jumps over him in the corner but walks into the Codebreaker to send him out to the floor. A hard baseball slide drops Fandango again and a BIG dive off the top knocks him to the floor. Back in and Jericho slaps him in the face but Fandango enziguris Jericho down to break up the springboard dropkick. Fandango stomps away before putting on a chinlock as Jericho’s forehead is cut open.

Jericho fights up and runs Fandango over with some shoulders before hitting a top rope dropkick. A Thesz Press of all things drops Fandango and there’s an enziguri to make up for earlier. Fandango sends him shoulder first into the post to take over again and the guillotine legdrop gets two.

Back up and Jericho counters a dropkick into a Walls attempt but Fandango kicks away. He goes up again but Jericho shakes the ropes to bring him down. A superplex is countered by a series of headbutts, only to have Jericho avoid another legdrop attempt. The Lionsault connects but Jericho tweaks his knee, allowing Fandango to small package him for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t bad for the most part and I’m not sure I can argue against it being the biggest upset in Wrestlemania history. Fandango may have wrestled as Johnny Curtis before but this was his debut as the character, making it a big deal to have him win here. Jericho has always been great at making people look good and that’s exactly what he did here.

We look back at the pre-show match with Miz winning the Intercontinental Title.

Another video on Rock vs. Cena, this time focusing on Rock and his fans. By this I mean fans saying Rock’s catchphrases.

We get a video of classic Wrestlemania moments set to the song playing in the Rocky Balboa vs. Apollo Creed fight in the first Rocky movie. This leads into a Sean Combs medley.

We recap Del Rio vs. Swagger. It’s a basic story: Del Rio is from Mexico and Swagger’s new manager Zeb Colter is very anti-foreigner. He’s as close to a white supremacist as you’ll get in modern WWE and rants about how evil foreigners are crippling America. The government won’t do anything about it so Jack Swagger will instead. He won the Elimination Chamber to earn the title shot here and has injured Ricardo’s ankle coming into the match.

Del Rio had turned face late last year and was on a roll as champion. He was suddenly a patriot who loved America but was also proud of being from Mexico. The character worked very well and his matches got about a hundred times better. Even I was digging Del Rio around this time while I’m not generally a good fan.

World Heavyweight Championship: Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger

After all that, Swagger doesn’t even get an entrance. AT WRESTLEMANIA. Colter goes into a rant about how horrible this country is because of how many other languages people speak now, including Chinese and Yiddish. However, Swagger will fix everything tonight by winning the World Heavyweight Championship. Del Rio wears an old school robe and after the big match intros we’re ready to go.

Del Rio quickly sends him to the floor and sends Swagger into the announcers’ table but gets trippled by Colter. Back inside and Jack sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. A quick rollup gets two for the champion but Jack drops him with a kick to the head. The Vader Bomb gets two but Del Rio counters Jack instead of having his knee wrapped around the post. Back in and Jack runs into a boot to the face before taking a few clotheslines to put the champion back in control.

Alberto stomps on Colter’s hand for good measure before the low superkick gets two. The armbreaker is countered into a kind of powerslam for a very close two as Jack is in control again. Jack takes out the knee and puts on the Patriot Lock but Alberto quickly kicks away. He misses the enziguri in the corner though and Jack stays up. Del Rio comes right back with a series of forearms in the corner and the Backstabber is good for two.

The champion hits a German suplex but takes his time following up. His cross armbreaker is countered into the gutwrench powerbomb to give Swagger a two count and there’s the Patriot Lock again. Alberto is almost to the ropes but Jack pulls him back into the middle. Instead Del Rio pulls him down into the armbreaker but Jack counters that into the Patriot Lock.

This time Alberto makes the ropes before countering another gutwrench suplex into a kick to the head. He limps into the corner enziguri for two as Colter puts Swagger’s leg on the ropes. Zeb goes even more evil by kicking Ricardo’s leg out to draw Del Rio outside, allowing Jack to send him into the barricade. Back in and Alberto grabs the armbreaker out of nowhere to retain the title. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: C+. This was getting good in the middle but they ran to the finish almost immediately. There’s a chemistry there and I’d love to see them do stuff on the mat and trade submissions for fifteen minutes. Instead it didn’t even get eleven and they cut off the technical stuff to go for the manager. That being said, it’s still a good match but it could have been great.

WWE supports the National Guard.

We recap Undertaker vs. CM Punk. As usual, Punk is trying to break the Streak but this time there’s an added caveat. Undertaker’s long term manager Paul Bearer recently passed away and Punk interrupted Undertaker’s tribute to him to promise to break the Streak. He even stole Bearer’s Urn and tossed it around like a football before dropping it on the concrete.

CM Punk vs. Undertaker

Living Colour plays Punk to the ring and Heyman is still at his side here. As always, Undertaker’s entrance is just freaking cool. Punk slaps him in the face to start and fires off forearms in the corner. Undertaker misses another big right hand and gets slapped in the face, so this time he just kicks Punk in the face. Punk is thrown out to the floor and into the timekeeper’s area where Undertaker nails him in the head again. The Dead Man loads up the announce table rams Punk into the post before being thrown back inside.

There’s a right hand to the head as the dueling chants begin. Taker drops the leg on the apron before driving his shoulder into Punk’s to set up Old School. Punk pulls him down off the top rope with an armdrag though and starts ramming elbows into Undertaker’s head. In something I can’t remember seeing from anyone else, Punk hits Old School to Undertaker. You can see how much he’s loving this and the facials are making it so much better.

Punk nails a Russian legsweep and cranks on Undertaker’s right arm. That goes nowhere as Undertaker puts him into the corner and hammers away but hits his own knee on a charge. A baseball slide puts Undertaker on the floor and Punk drops a top rope ax handle (with the finger poke of course). Back in and Punk gets two off a neckbreaker but Undertaker comes back with right hands. A high kick gets two for Punk as Heyman shouts about CM getting more and more momentum.

We hit the chinlock on the taller guy but Taker quickly fights up, only to charge into a boot to the face. Punk tries another Old School but crotches himself on the top rope. A big right hand puts Punk on the floor but Heyman gets on the apron to block the Taker Dive. The distraction lets Punk hit another neckbreaker for two. Punk nails the running knee in the corner followed by the Macho Elbow for another near fall. Taker escapes a GTS attempt and plants Punk with a chokeslam for two of his own.

A big series of right hands has Punk covering up in the corner and it’s the snake eyes and big boot combo but Punk leg lariats Undertaker down to block the boot. The dueling chants pick up again before Punk sends Taker back to the floor. An uppercut slows Punk down but he’s able to escape a Last Ride through the table. He kicks Undertaker in the head to set up the Macho Elbow onto the table, which doesn’t break. That always looks sick.

Both guys are down and Punk looks to have injured his leg. Punk is able to get back inside and we tease a countout until Undertaker dives back in at nine. Back in and Undertaker tries Hell’s Gate but can’t quite get it on. Punk flips over for two and hooks the Anaconda Vice. Undertaker’s shoulders stay down for two but he sits up and stares Punk in the eyes for a great counter.

The chokeslam is countered into the GTS but Taker bounces into the ropes and hits the Tombstone for a very close two. They slug it out but Punk’s shots have no effect. Taker loads up the chokeslam but Punk shoves the referee down. Heyman distracts Undertaker but Punk injures his knee by kicking Undertaker in the ribs. The Last Ride is countered by an urn shot for another close two. The GTS is countered into a Tombstone which is countered into a GTS which is countered into a Tombstone to make Undertaker 21-0.

Rating: B. I liked the match but it’s still not as good as it’s made out to be. The urn to the head into the Undertaker cover was done better at Wrestlemania X7 and I never bought Punk’s covers as serious threats. It’s still a good match and I was into it more than the match at Wrestlemania 27, but it’s still not Punk getting inches away from breaking the Streak like it’s been made out to be.

Undertaker picks up the Urn for a nice tribute to Bearer.

Ad for the Mick Foley DVD.

Video on Cena, focusing on redemption.

Michelle Beadle is here.

We recap HHH vs. Brock Lesnar. They started feuding the night after Extreme Rules 2012 when Lesnar broke HHH’s arm, setting up a match at Summerslam. Brock beat HHH by breaking his arm again and HHH thought about walking away. However, Lesnar attacked Vince and put him in the hospital. This fired up HHH enough to want a rematch here at Wrestlemania on the grandest stage of them all. Brock also broke Shawn Michaels’ arm and you know that’s too far for HHH.

It’s No DQ and if HHH loses he has to retire. This is of course completely different from the no holds barred match at Summerslam. From what I remember, a grand total of no one wanted to see a rematch but it’s HHH at Wrestlemania so you knew it had to happen. The stipulations dropped the interest even further.

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Shawn and Heyman are in the respective corners. As always, Brock looks nothing short of terrifying. HHH has powder all over himself as he comes out through a skull entrance. They slug it out to start and of course HHH gets the better of it. Remember when Brock just destroyed Cena and Big Show with right hands? Forget that, because they’re not HHH. A knee to the ribs finally puts Lesnar in control but they fall out to the floor. Lesnar is sent into the barricade and then into the announce table as HHH is dominating in the first minute.

Brock comes back with a chair but misses a swing and hits the steps. They head into the crowd with HHH clotheslining him back to ringside. Back in and HHH blocks the chair shot with a running knee before throwing Brock back to the floor. Brock goes head first into the steps but comes right back with an overhead belly to belly. There is a MASSIVE bruise on Brock’s left pectoral. Shawn is looking concerned as Brock suplexes HHH through the announce table and roars.

Another overhead belly to belly on to the remnants of the table have HHH reeling. Back in and Brock stomps away in the corner before charging into a boot. Not that it matters as he comes right back with a third belly to belly for two. HHH tries to elbow out of a German but gets thrown down again with ease. Another German gets two but HHH fires off right hands, only to be whipped over the corner and out to the floor.

Brock glares at Shawn long enough for HHH to come back with a big running clothesline. Another clothesline puts Brock in the timekeeper’s area and there’s a big chair shot to his back. Back in and Brock snaps off another German for two before knocking Shawn off the apron with a big right hand. Trips comes back again with a spinebuster because he’s capable of going move for move with Brock Lesnar. A Pedigree is countered into an F5 attempt but Brock lets go to avoid a superkick from Shawn. It’s Michaels taking the F5 instead, only to have Lesnar take the Pedigree for two.

The sledgehammer is brought in but Brock ducks the shot and takes a massive F5 for two. They head outside again with HHH being whipped hard into the steps. The steps bounce off HHH’s head before Brock throws them into the ring for some fun. Another shot with the steps is good for two as the fans aren’t really responding to a lot of these near falls. Even Heyman says that’s enough but HHH slaps Brock in the face.

A slugout (won by HHH of course) is countered into the Kimura but HHH drives him into the corner for the break. The same hold is countered the same way before Brock puts him on the middle rope to slap the hold on again. HHH lifts Brock into the air and puts him down with another spinebuster to break. Brock misses a charge into the post and HHH hits a hard low blow to put both guys down. HHH crushes the arm against the post with a chair as

Shawn is laid against the barricade with his head up watching. Another chair shot to the arm crushes it against the steps and HHH puts on a Kimura of his own. Heyman tries to interfere but walks into a superkick. Brock finally powers up and slams HHH down onto the steps for another break. HHH grabs the hold again and gets slammed down onto the steps one more time. There’s a third Kimura to Brock but he plants lifts HHH into the air, only to be countered into a DDT on the steps. A sledgehammer to the face sets up the Pedigree on the steps for the pin.

Rating: B. As mentioned earlier, the match was good but the interest just wasn’t there. The times when HHH was able to go punch for punch with Lesnar were just ridiculous but we live in HHH’s WWE anymore. At least he didn’t make Lesnar submit to an MMA hold and Lesnar got to break some stuff. The match is certainly entertaining and I can live with HHH winning at Wrestlemania, but they had to keep it going one more match as a result which was pure overkill.

Hall of Fame time. This year’s class includes Mick Foley, Trish Stratus, Bob Backlund, Booker T, Donald Trump and of course Bruno Sammartino.

Wrestlemania XXX is in New Orleans.

The new attendance record: 80,676.

WWE Championship: John Cena vs. The Rock

Twice in a lifetime. Rock is of course the crowd favorite and defending. After the big match intros we’re ready to go. Cena grabs a headlock to start as they have a lot of time to work with here. A hard shoulder puts Rock down before they do the exact same sequence with the roles reversed. Rock grabs a second headlock before throwing him down with a hiptoss. Cena bails for a bit before taking over with right hands and a hard whip into the corner.

The fans are entirely behind Rock here as he comes back with more right hands and a hard whip of his own. More mirroring of the other. Some shots to the chest have Cena in trouble but he comes back with a clothesline followed by a chinlock. Back up and a belly to belly gets two on Rock before we’re back in the hold again. Rock counters into a sleeper as the crowd is oddly quiet.

That goes nowhere so Rock grabs a Samoan drop to put both guys down again. Cena gets two off a fisherman’s suplex but misses the tackle. The STF doesn’t work either and Rock grabs his bad looking Sharpshooter. That goes nowhere as Cena powers out and initiates his finishing sequence, only to miss the Shuffle. A Rock Bottom is countered into a bad looking crossface (not the STF Cole you dolt) but Rock rolls out.

Now the Shuffle connects but the AA is countered into a spinebuster. The Elbow takes too long though and now the STF (JBL: “THERE is the STF Michael!”) goes on, only to have Rock power out of it. The Rock Bottom gets two and so does the AA, with the latter allegedly ripping Rock’s abdomen apart and giving him a hernia which means he’s probably never wrestling again because insurance companies don’t want to deal with that risk.

Cena misses the top rope Fameasser and now the Elbow connects for two. John rolls outside so Rock can recover a bit. Back in and Rock wins a slugout but tries a cross body which is of course easily caught. Cena looks bored catching him like that. The AA is countered into another Rock Bottom followed by more laying around. Rock tries the Elbow again complete with You Can’t See Me but he runs into the AA for two more. They slug it out yet again and Cena hits a Rock Bottom of his own for two.

John loads up the People’s Elbow just like last year but hangs onto the ropes when Rock gets up. The AA is countered into yet another Rock Bottom for yet another two. They counter finishers again until Rock nails a DDT to break the finisher streak at like 8. Back up and another Rock Bottom is countered into another AA to give Cena the title back.

Rating: B-. Now just to clarify, they did get in some finishers right? This was bordering on parody with all of those kickouts as they went from headlocks and shoulders to Rock Bottom/AA a go-go for the last ten minutes. It was entertaining for the most part but much like any other match, when you pound finishers into the ground like they, they stop meaning anything.

They say something we can’t hear and shake hands after the match. Cena leaves Rock alone in the ring and waits for him on the stage. They pose together to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The show is definitely entertaining and I shortchanged some stuff when I watched it live. My main criticism still holds up though: nothing felt big here. Even a year later, what is important here? Cena won the title, only to have Bryan charge up the ladder and become the real star after Cena feuded with Ryback for a few months. Lesnar and HHH had their real blowoff a month later. Punk vs. Undertaker was good but the real moment for Punk was at MITB.

Overall the show works well enough and is entertaining for a one off viewing, but it doesn’t feel like a big deal. The two main events are both rematches from the previous year and that isn’t the best idea for Wrestlemania. It didn’t help that the last three matches all had really obvious endings so it was more about just killing time rather than any intrigue. Still though, all three of those matches are at least good and there’s nothing really horrible so it’s definitely a solid show.

Ratings Comparison

The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Original: D+

Redo: C

Shield vs. Randy Orton/Sheamus/Big Show

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

Original: D

Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston vs. HELL NO

Original: C

Redo: D+

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

Original: D

Redo: C

Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. CM Punk

Original: B

Redo: B

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: B

John Cena vs. The Rock

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/07/wrestlemania-xxix-and-so-it-ends/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:




2013 Wrestling Observer Newsletter Awards Announced

Dave Meltzer’s WON Awards are out so it’s time to see how much he loves Japan this year. I’ll include my winners as well and my thoughts on his, though keep in mind I don’t watch puro and I’m only a casual MMA fan at best. Also before I start, I’m well aware that Meltzer’s readers vote on this, but if you believe the majority of them do anything but repeat what he says, you’re more delusional than I can help.

Wrestler of the Year – Hiroshi Tanahashi (John Cena/Daniel Bryan)

Everyone says it’s Bryan or Cena, Meltzer picks the top Japanese guy. Is anyone surprised by this?

Most Valuable MMA Fighter – Georges St. Pierre

I’ll take his word for it.

Most Outstanding Wrestler – Hiroshi Tanahashi

I’m still not sure how this is different from Wrestler of the Year

Best Box Office Draw – Georges St. Pierre

Next.

Feud of the Year – Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Kazuchika Okada (Rhodes Family vs. Authority)

I’ve heard good things about this feud but I saw their match from the January 4 show and wasn’t blown away.

Tag Team of the Year – Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns (Shield)

I lump tag teams and groups together so no arguments here.

Most Improved – Roman Reigns (Bo Dallas)

Reigns was a popular pick but he was more along the lines of “guy who gets more focus”. I get the pick though.

Best Interviews – Paul Heyman

Why don’t I do one of these? Heyman is fine.

Most Charismatic – Hiroshi Tanahashi

Just name the awards after him already.

Best Technical Wrestler – Daniel Bryan

Even though he mainly uses strikes now?

Best Brawler – Katsuyori Shibata

Yeah whatever.

Best Flying Wrestler – Kota Ibushi

I was impressed by what I saw of him so why not.

Most Underrated – Antonio Cesaro

I’m fine with that as he deserves a far bigger push.

Promotion of the Year – New Japan

I’m as shocked as you are.

Best Weekly TV Show – NXT

Amen.

Most Outstanding Fighter – Cain Velasquez

No argument there I suppose.

Match of the Year – Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Kazuchika Okada, April 7 (CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar)

Again, bow down to Japan.

Fight of the Year – Gilbert Melendez vs. Diego Sanchez

I heard good things so sure.

Rookie of the Year – Yohei Komatsu (Big E. Langston)

I’d love to know how many voters have seen more than one match from most of these guys. It would be an interesting result.

Non-Wrestler of the Year – Paul Heyman (Paul Heyman)

Yeah.

TV Announcer of the Year – William Regal

Fine again.

Major Wrestling Show of the Year – New Japan G-1 Day 4

Lather, rinse, repeat.

Best Maneuver of the Year – Okada’s Rainmaker

It’s a clothesline. Seriously, it’s a clothesline.

Best Booker – Jedo/Gedo, New Japan

Next.

Promoter of the Year – Dana White, UFC

Be careful. New Japan might not want to spoon after.

Gimmick of the Year – Wyatt Family

For the sheep mask alone.

Best Book – Mad Dogs, Midgets and Screwjobs – Pat LaParade and Bertrand Herbert

Never heard of it but it sounds interesting.

Best DVD – Jim Crocket Promotions: The Good Old Days

Heard of it, looks interesting.

Most Overrated – Randy Orton

So not only does Japan win, but it’s time to rip America.

Worst TV Announcer – Taz

Ok I’ll give him that one.

Worst Major Show – Battleground (Battleground)

Two in a row.

Most Disgusting Promotional Tactic – Exploiting Paul Bearer’s Death

I can get why people wouldn’t like it.

Worst TV Show – Impact

I’d go with Smackdown due to it not needing to exist but Impact was awful.

Worst match of the Year – 10 Diva tag, November 24 (Same)

No argument there.

Worst Feud – Big Show vs. Authority

No arguments there unless you want to go with the Divas, which I think I would have.

Worst Promotion – TNA

Again no arguments.

Worst Gimmick – Aces and 8’s

They were a gimmick still?

Interestingly enough, no ROH wins at all. As usual, New Japan is the amazing company that about 18 people in America actually while thousands claim they do and Meltzer continues to ignore WWE, which I’m sure has nothing to do with them firing him back in 1987. I mean, clearly Savage vs. Steamboat was only 4.25 stars, right Dave?

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Impact Wrestling – January 2, 2014: TNA Shows Some Fire

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 2, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

The main story tonight is the coronation of Magnus as the new world champion, which screams AJ Styles return. It’s clear that they’re setting up a unification match in the near future which should be interesting, even if the result has been spoiled by the latest news with Styles. Other than that we could see more of whatever Bully Ray was talking about last week when he promised to be more evil than ever. Let’s get to it.

Aries vs. Sabin for the X Title tonight.

Here’s Angle to open things up. He talks about 2013 being the worst year of his career which is why he declined the Hall of Fame induction. Angle promises to make up for it in 2014 but here’s Bobby Roode to interrupt. Bobby thinks Angle is going to announce his retirement because he knows he can’t beat Bobby Roode. If that’s the case, Roode wants Angle to admit that Roode is the better man face to face.

Kurt says he’s here to make it clear that he’ll dominate 2014. That’s why he wants one more match with Bobby, which sends Roode into fits of shouting WHAT. He turns Angle down because he has nothing left to prove to either Angle or the fans. Roode finally agrees to the match at Genesis, but if Angle loses, he can never go into the Hall of Fame. Angle agrees as long as the match can be in a steel cage. Roode shouts a lot more and says it’s on. They brawl again until referees and Spud come out to break it up. Spud gets shoved down so he says both guys can find a partner for a tag match tonight.

Dixie says she’s spent eleven years trying to find the perfect champion and she’ll find it tonight. She walks through a door and is given a note saying See You Tonight.

After a break, Spud is tasked with finding out who sent the note.

Gail Kim vs. Madison Rayne

This is part of the Open Challenge. Madison poses on the middle rope but dives off with a cross body to get us going. Gail gets stomped down in the corner but comes back with some mounted right hands. Madison armdrags her down but Tapa pulls Rayne out to the floor. Back in and Gail puts on a surfboard with a dragon sleeper to bend Madison in some very impressive directions.

Gail lets go of the hold and it’s a double clothesline to put both girls down. Eat Defeat is countered into a backslide for two before Madison goes to the middle rope, only to be slammed face first into the mat. Another Eat Defeat attempt is countered into a side roll by Madison for the pin at 5:08.

Rating: C-. The match was fine from a technical standpoint but there’s no emotion or interest in this division anymore. It’s just insert challenger here facing off with whoever the champion is that month with no significant story at all. Madison is a nice breath of air but it’s nothing that’s going to make things better long term.

Chris Sabin shushes Velvet Sky and threatens to leave her if she doesn’t do what he says tonight.

Angle gets Gunner to be his partner tonight when Storm comes up to say that’s interesting.

X-Division title: Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries

Aries is defending. Sabin hides in the corner to start until Aries takes over with a running dropkick. The Last Chancery has Sabin in early trouble but Aries lets go of the hold. Chris goes to the floor to yell at Velvet who says it’s not her match. Back in and Aries gets two off an elbow before busting out a stump puller of all things. A slingshot splash and Lionsault get two each for Aries but Sabin comes back with a belly to back suplex.

Aries gets caught in the Tree of Woe but does a situp to grab Sabin by the face and pull him down with a Diamond Cutter. Nice counter. Sabin bails to the floor and gets taken down with a double ax handle. Back in and Sabin tells Velvet to get on the apron as a distraction, allowing Chris to low blow Aries and grab a small package for the pin and the title at 5:45.

Rating: C+. This was fun while it lasted but it makes Aries’ title reign seem completely worthless. TNA is usually better about not changing titles back and forth at the drop of a hat so hopefully this doesn’t become a trend. I could however go for more of Velvet Sky in tight blue dresses.

Spud keeps looking for information about the note when he gets a call. No one is on the phone and Spud says he’s gotten four calls from that number. It’s a 678 area code, which Google says is the area code for Gainesville, Georgia.

Samuel Shaw vs. Norv Fernum

Shaw is in dress pants and a long sleeve shirt with black gloves. He escorts Christy to the floor and looks almost bored. A powerslam and Orton backbreaker have Fernum in trouble and a standing choke (imagine the start of a Rock Bottom but Shaw clasps his hands and chokes) gets the win for Shaw at 1:38.

James storm is going to show Angle why he made a mistake in picking Gunner. He opens a door and sees someone he’s been looking for.

Post break and of course Storm was talking to Roode. Storm says he hates Roode but needs to be his partner tonight to send a message. Roode says that’s not his problem and he doesn’t need Storm, just like always. Storm says he’ll be out there tonight one way or another.

Video on Magnus getting to the title.

James Storm/Bobby Roode vs. Gunner/Kurt Angle

Storm and Angle get things going with Kurt elbowing James in the face. Off to Roode vs. Gunner with Gunner going face first into the buckle. That seems to just make Gunner mad as he comes back with a slingshot suplex for two on Roode. Bobby comes back with a spinebuster but Storm tags himself in for some two counts and right hands to the head.

Beer Money hits the double suplex for a flashback as the old team starts getting their game together. Kurt has enough of standing on the apron and comes in to clean house with rolling Germans on Roode. There’s an overhead belly to belly on Storm followed by the ankle lock until Roode makes the save. Gunner picks Roode up in the Gun Rack but Storm Last Calls Gunner, allowing Roode to hit the Death Valley Driver for the pin at 6:40.

Rating: C+. Beer Money continues to have chemistry but I’m hoping this is a one off thing. Storm has been ready for a singles run for years now but they keep putting him into tag teams because that’s what he’s done before. The Gunner team was a step back for him and Beer Money would be an even bigger one. Both singles matches should rock though.

Spud accuses Sting of sending the note but Sting blows him off.

Here’s EC3 to brag about getting rid of Jeff Hardy. Even though Jeff is gone to write songs about the Creatures, EC3 tells Christy to introduce Jeff for a match. Naturally there’s no Jeff so Carter “wins” by forfeit. Carter counts to ten (“One, two, EC3”) but here’s Sting to interrupt. Sting calls Carter a dog who can’t do anything without his Aunt Dixie there to save him. Carter is just Dixie’s lap dog but Sting wants him to get off the leash and prove he’s a man. Ethan bails so Sting calls him a lap dog again. The fans agree with Sting’s nickname so Carter agrees to fight Sting at Genesis.

Joseph Park doesn’t remember turning into Abyss so it can’t be real. Eric Young has put him in a match with Bully Ray because Abyss wrestled Ray two years ago this week. Eric leaves and Ray comes up to say Park will be all alone tonight, just like Ray is now. Ray threatens to set Park on fire.

Joseph Park vs. Bully Ray

Ray stands in the corner in a hoodie, jeans and sunglasses. He looks up at Park and kicks him low for the DQ at 57 seconds. That was the only move of the match.

Post match Ray pulls out a bottle of lighter fluid and covers Park before pulling out a lighter. Mr. Anderson runs out for the save but Ray sprays him with fluid as well. There’s the lighter again but Ray turns it off and walks away.

It’s time for the coronation with Spud and Ethan in the ring in front of a throne, ferns and the Union Jack. Spud calls this bigger than the royal wedding and says Dixieland is a place where dreams come true. Ethan, the Master of Ceremonies, brags about how awesome he is and talks about how Magnus rules the world. He finally brings out Dixie who is booed out of the building. She talks about being on a plane to England and seeing a magazine article on AJ Styles. Then she saw a piece on Magnus who was a huge star in the United Kingdom and was all that (her words).

Here’s the champion in a nice suit with the title over his shoulder. Magnus: “This is your champion speaking. Please return your women to their full and upright positions.” Before Magnus goes anywhere he has to thank Dixie for everything she’s done for him over the years. Magnus knows that the fans expected Roode, Angle or even Hardy here but he proved everyone wrong. It wasn’t him that turned his back on the fans but rather the fans who turned on him. He’ll be world champion for a VERY long time but here’s Gunner with the briefcase as we go to our last break.

Back with Gunner saying he’s cashing in right now. Dixie says this isn’t happening but Gunner cleans house anyway. Magnus is the only one left standing but Spud gets in a cheap shot to take him down. Magnus loads up a belt shot but AJ Styles runs in through the crowd for the showdown. They hold up their belts and AJ lays his on the mat like a line in the sand. Magnus bails with Dixie and AJ says come get your intellectual property.

AJ isn’t here because Dixie wants him here but rather because Dixie screwed the people. He needed to come back here because Magnus is a farce. Magnus will never be a world champion until he beats THE world champion. If Magnus wants to be what he says he is, he’ll have to accept the challenge. The fans chant YOU’RE A PUPPET, taking away a lot of the intensity they’re going for here.

If Magnus doesn’t accept, he’ll always doubt himself as the champion. However, if AJ walks out those doors again, his offer goes with him. Magnus agrees to fight next week (instead of at Genesis for some reason) and tells Dixie if he doesn’t fight, he’s leaving too. Dixie says over her dead body but Magnus says give AJ a one night only contract. They shake hands and the match is official.

Overall Rating: B-. This wasn’t a perfect show tonight but they did a good job with what they had. The Bully Ray stuff has me intrigued and the AJ return can get them on to something new. Tonight was about the storytelling instead of the matches and there’s nothing wrong with that. We’re headed towards Genesis which has a stacked card that should be one of their better PPV shows in awhile. Good effort tonight, though I have very little faith that they can keep it up.

Results

Madison Rayne b. Gail Kim – Side roll

Chris Sabin b. Austin Aries – Small package

James Storm/Bobby Roode b. Kurt Angle/Gunner – Last Call to Gunner

Joseph Park b. Bully Ray via DQ when Ray kicked Park low

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of In Your House at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:




Mind Blown

I saw the ebook sale figures for December and they broke my record by a staggering 30%.  I have no words to describe how amazed I am at this and I can’t thank you enough.

If you haven’t checked out any of my stuff, here’s my Amazon page with everything I’ve released so far.  If you’re not in America, just enter any of the titles into your country’s Amazon.

 

The new book should be out in roughly 3 weeks.

 

KB




Happy New Year

Thanks to everyone for supporting me this year.  I’ll be around all year with more of my ramblings, including all of the Count-Ups (Royal Rumble double shot coming tomorrow), a new version of On This Day (also debuting tomorrow) and my first ever live report from Wrestlemania.

I hope the year goes as well for you as 2013 went for me.

KB

PS – Not Jay is officially not guilty of all charges and will not have to deal with security ever again.




On This Day: December 31, 2001 – Monday Night Raw: Closing Out The Year In Style

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 31, 2001
Hosts: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

There’s not much to say here because it’s a Best Of Show. I don’t know if this includes matches from Smackdown or not, but to the best of my knowledge there’s nothing new on here. Therefore I’ll be cutting and pasting anything from Raw and redoing anything from Smackdown, so don’t stop reading now and go on to the full thing. I’ll wait here while you do it. Let’s get to it.

Michael and Jerry are in an empty arena and complains about being here with Lawler. I think this is a three hours special.

It’s a top ten as selected by the fans. The matches on the show are clipped but I’ll be posting the full versions of them. I won’t be including backstories but check out the full reviews of the shows if you need them. Odds are you won’t though. In case you’re incredibly dense, all shows listed are the 2001 versions.

#10: Royal Rumble – IntercontinentalTitle: ChrisBenoitvs. ChrisJericho

I’ve always loved the prove me wrong line that Benoit had. It was perfect for him as it was short and sweet and correct. That’s all you need a lot of the time. Jericho has a bad shoulder here too to offer some psychology to the match. It helps here as your arms can help you climb a ladder so if nothing else it fits the flow of the match here which can often be the most important part of the match.

They bring the ladder in and somehow we get even more physical than we already were in this match. This was some of Jericho’s best in ring stuff around this time as he was clearly having a blast. See, the difference between WCW and WWF is that here, Benoit and Jericho are likely going to steal the show. They did it in WCW as well but there they would likely just do the same thing again until they jobbed to a 42 year old that didn’t need a push at all.

Here, Benoit would be a workhorse that got all kinds of praise and big matches while in less than a year Jericho would be world champion. Ah here we go. It’s ladder and other weapons time. After some stiff shots in the ring, Jericho goes to the floor and grabs a chair. Benoit launches a suicide dive at him but goes straight into the chair in a great looking spot. And see, Jericho SELLS THE SHOULDER. How hard is that for people to learn?

This turns into a game of top this as they come up with more and more ridiculous ways to hurt each other with the ladder. One of them is Benoit being tied into the ladder on the second rope and Jericho hooking a side Russian legsweep on him, bringing the ladder down with them. There’s stuff in here straight out of a Wile E. Coyote cartoon.

Benoit gives Jericho a belly to back suplex over the top rope. That’s cool looking if nothing else. Climbing back in, we have a fight up on the top of the ladder, which leads to the spot of the match. Jericho knocks Benoit backwards, and puts THE WALLS OF JERICHO on him on top of the ladder. To say this looks both incredible and painful is a total understatement. That just got this match a much higher grade.

Benoit goes off the ladder but has the energy to kick it over to save the title. This is great stuff here. Back on the mat, Jericho gets caught in the crossface and taps, but obviously this means nothing. There’s at least some psychology here as Benoit already has Jericho’s shoulder hurt so he works on it. That’s at least smart. Since there’s nothing else to do, Benoit is picked up and just thrown into the ladder.

Why not? Sometimes the best solution is just to beat the other person up with the ladder. It’s working here if nothing else. In yet another great visual, we go to the top for a suplex but Jericho is shoved off. Benoit goes for the swan dive, and the whole crowd just rises to their feet to watch in amazement at what they’re seeing. That’s how you know you’re doing a great job: the crowd responds to you.

We finally get one of the first dead spots of the match which is perfectly acceptable in this case as they’re half dead. This lasts all of four seconds though as Jericho comes back in with a chair and just wears out Benoit with it while he’s standing on the ladder. Benoit gets pushed off and bounces off the ropes, then the apron and then the floor, which is enough for Jericho to get the belt. DANG that was painful looking. The highlight package of this match doesn’t do it justice.

Rating: A. This was a freaking brutal fight. They beat the living crap out of each other here and are going to be hard to top. For some reason this match isn’t really remembered, and that was the case even before Benoit was deleted from history. These guys went at it like no other and beat the living tar out of each other. Go find a copy of this as it’s definitely worth it. Great brawling match with tons of brutal spots.

There’s some banter between Jerry and Cole during the spaces in between but it’s just filler talk so I won’t be mentioning it here.

#9: Wrestlemania – Undertakervs. HHH

Back then, HHH was a bigger star than he is now. He beat Austin, the king of the world, twice in one night the previous month. Taker was about 8 months into his biker gimmick and was a step behind what he used to be at though. However, this was his hometown and it’s Wrestlemania, although this is before the Streak became important.

Motorhead plays HHH to the ring and it is freaking awesome. They play the verse and chorus all the way through before we cut to a long shot of the arena and we see Triple H, Start Game flash on the screen, then a small object appears beneath it. Cut to a shot of HHH and then back to the arena. My goodness these stadiums are awesome. The live band is always cool as they play him through the long walk down the aisle.

 

HHH does a double water spit so you know this is an important show. The song ends and HHH paces back and forth. We hear gong strikes, and the lights go out. DEAD MAN WALKING. Instead of walking down the huge ramp, Taker drives his bike down instead in another famous shot. The cool thing here is it’s long enough that he can crank it up and gets the bike flying down the aisle. Taker jumps in the ring, rips the shirt off and we’re on.

Just as Taker is about to start the fight, JR mentions that he is 8-0, undefeated at Wrestlemania. Ladies and Gentlemen, the streak is born. That’s the first time that it’s mentioned on WWF television to my knowledge, but certainly the first time at Wrestlemania. The fight starts on the floor with Taker hammering away. Guess what Taker knocks HHH through. Go on, I want you to guess. It rhymes with French announce table. You guessed it. Twice in one night has to be a record.

 

They slug it out in the ring and the knee to the face gets HHH nowhere. BIG back drop puts HHH down. Powerslam gets two and a big clothesline takes down HHH. Old School is countered. Not sure how HHH knew it was coming. Might be that Taker shouted out OLD SCHOOL right before he went for it. Just a hunch mind you. The Game hammers away on Taker including a trio of elbows. That and a neckbreaker gets three straight two counts.

 

HHH goes after the ref and gets shoved back which gets a huge pop. My goodness this crowd is white hot. Six minutes in and HHH gets the sledgehammer. Referee takes it from him so HHH tries a Pedigree which is blocked into a catapult and the referee goes down. Chokeslam gets two because the referee was slow thanks to him getting bumped.

 

Taker, being the ticked off man that he is, beats the referee up because of this. The throw that Taker sends HHH to the floor with is either great selling or a real throw. We go into the crowd and actually wind up at the production tower which has been seen maybe twice in company history. This is what the cameras sit on in the arena and where the sound is adjusted etc. Quite simply if they screw up here, the PPV goes off the air.

HHH now has a problem. He’s trying to run from Taker, but the only way to run is to keep climbing the tower. HHH finds a chair up there though and lands about 10 sick chair shots to Taker. They’re in a tiny place so Taker is laid out and HHH just hits him wherever he can with the chair. Great visual on that. Taker gets up and catches HHH after the Game poses. The flashbulbs are going so crazy it’s hard to see them for a little bit.

 

He then chokeslams him off the tower. Now think about why this is cool. No one has ever seen them fight here before so it’s unknown. There’s no referee as Taker beat him up. Most importantly, we don’t see HHH land. What did he land on? That’s what makes this cool: the total mystery of it. Sadly, we see he landed on a big pad, but it still must have knocked him out a bit. If not, the elbow Taker drops on him does. What’s a good American Tough Guy to do now? He beats up the EMTs of course.

They fight back to the ring and the referee is still down. What the heck? He got kicked and elbowed, not shot in the forehead. Taker gets the hammer and a low blow to make him drop it a few seconds later. Heyman talking about how dangerous weapons are is either a rib by him or the best unintentional comedy I’ve heard in a long time. HHH gets a tombstone countered because he’s not the Undertaker, and Taker breaks out the Tombstone for maybe the first or second time in a year plus.

 

The crowd loves it, but still there’s no referee. In a sweet finish, Taker goes for the Last Ride but HHH picks up the hammer and nails him in the head with it. That somehow only gets two. Taker is bleeding and HHH sends him to the corner to rain down right hands. He pauses for a split second to yell at the crowd, and Taker reaches up and grabs him before stepping forward, lifting him into the air and drilling him with the Last Ride! He gets the pin as the crowd explodes.

Rating: A+. This is an outstanding match and would have main evented any other show of the year. The story was great, the fighting was off the charts, and you never knew who was going to win until the very end. Excellent job from both guys involved and probably the true forgotten classic in Wrestlemania history.

These are heavily clipped as the previous match ran about 20 minutes live and was less than ten here.

Flair wishes us a happy new year and gives us the top five shock moments of the new year:

5. ECW returns and joins with WCW to form the Alliance with Stephanie as co-owner. That’s still one of my favorite moments ever, partially because of how great Stephanie looked in that pink dress.

4. Booker T cost Austin the Undisputed Title match at Vengeance.

3. Drew Carey in the Rumble.

2. Undertaker turns heel and destroys JR, making him kiss Vince.

1. Ric Flair is the new co-owner.

No Shane as WCW owner? I’m sorry but no. This list is officially a failure.

Back to the the countdown.

#8: King of the Ring – ShaneMcMahonvs. KurtAngle

It should be noted that this is one of my favorite matches ever so I’ll be biased in it. Wait, they’re my reviews so I’m biased towards myself, so it’s fine. Angle throws his medals down on the way to the ring so you know this is serious. Again, JR says that after I typed it so I win again. Angle is just beating the tar out of Shane to start here. And just as I say that Shane starts throwing lefts and fights back.

With Shane on the floor, Angle gets on all fours and wants to go amateur, which is more popular that pro in certain areas other than wrestling. Naturally Angle easily gets out and beats on Shane even more. In a nice looking move, Angle hits a gutwrench but it’s overhead instead of to the side. It looked cool. Angle is just throwing Shane everywhere. It looks like a squash but don’t worry. It’ll get better. Shane has had three punches and an armdrag.

He offers Shane another amateur attempt but this time Shane just punts him in the ribs. That’s followed by a jumping back elbow making him awesome. On the floor now, Shane gets on the railing behind JR and Heyman and jumps over both them and the table to hit Kurt with a clothesline in a sweet spot. The guy was athletic and no one can ever argue that.

It’s certainly more entertaining than seeing Vince out there making a fool out of himself. And we have a kendo stick which Shane can swing really well. He actually breaks it over Angle’s back which has to feel awful. Shane uses armdrags on the floor to send Angle into the railing which is a nice spot. Shane goes for a cover and Angle bridges out of it. Think of the Matrix move.

Shane does the smart thing and just hits him in the stomach. Angle does this three times, showing off his stupidity. It’s weapons time now and Shane is dominating. Ankle lock by Shane and Kurt just kicks him in the face. Nothing wrong with that. We get a Sharpshooter attempt and Shane botches it but gets it eventually. It looks bad but it’s ok I guess. Granted almost no one gets it right so it’s fine.

Shane is just beating the heck out of Angle here. He puts a trash can on his stomach and goes to the top for a shooting star press which misses but looked solid. The fans get a hokey smoke chant going as they’re impressed here. We hit the floor again and Shane hits a suplex, which breaks Kurt’s tailbone. He’s legit hurt which makes the rest of the match even more impressive. His solution to Shane fighting back: slam Shane’s head into a wall. I like the simple ideas.

 

In the sickest bump you’ll see in years, Angle suplexes Shane over his head into one of the glass walls with KOR (what, no love for the?) on them. The problem is that it doesn’t break and Shane lands on his head which goes THUD. It sounded and looked SICK. Shane is more or less out of it.

Angle, ticked off that it didn’t work, picks him up and does it AGAIN, this time having it work, drawing another holy crap chant. Angle’s arm is bleeding. We’re under the stage now and Angle suplexes him again and AGAIN it doesn’t break. Shane is busted. Angle goes for another suplex and it doesn’t break. In essence, Shane is being thrown into a wall. Kurt is ticked and just picks him up and launches him through a glass wall.

Shane looks like he’s been beaten by an army and raped by a bear while being run over by a train. Angle is spent too. Everyone is just bleeding awfully. Angle gets an anvil case and puts Shane on it to wheel him back to the ring. That’s a good idea as he’s just dead weight at this point. We’re back in the ring and Angle covers Shane. For two. The place pops like a freaking teenage girl for that. We get a replay where we can see Kurt’s face and he looks like he wants to cry.

A low blow connects and Shane isn’t dead yet. He gets a trash can lid and just pops the heck out of Angle and hits an Olympic Slam for two. Both guys are just freaking spent. Shane gets catapulted into the corner where he just kind of collapses. Angle gets a board from somewhere and just beats Shane about the back and shoulder with it. There’s something awesome about that.

He sets it up on the copes and climbs to the top where he this the Olympic Slam from the top rope. I would say Shane lands in the middle of the ring with a thud, but as they said in Con Air, “the word ain’t land. It’s crash.” They show a bunch a replays and the slam looks cooler and cooler ever time. I mean Shane just explodes on the mat and it looks amazing. Shane’s best match ever by about 1000 miles. They carry him out and he’s just gone. The Slam off the top got the pin if that wasn’t clear.

Rating: A. This was just freaking brutal. It’s a great street fight where you never really believed Shane was completely out of it. That’s a great thing to be able to say, but Shane took the best beating I can recall anyone taking in a long time. Find a copy of this match as it’s right up there with any beating I’ve ever seen.

We get a video from the 9/11 show, with Lillian singing the Star Spangled Banner. They don’t show the whole song. Seriously? You clipped the national anthem two days after September 11? REALLY? Lillian hitting the high notes on this still gives me chills. That’s pretty awesome.

#7: Monday Night Raw – May 21, 2001 – Tag Titles: Steve Austin/HHH vs. Chris Benoit/Chris Jericho

 

Here we go. Austin vs. Jericho gets us going and one of the belts is laying in the ring. Austin takes over with pounding boots but Jericho snaps off a cross body for two. A top rope elbow to the head scores for Jericho and he works on Austin’s arm. HHH comes in and the Canadians take over. Benoit chops Austin HARD and then hits a snap suplex for no cover. There’s a superplex for two as HHH saves.

 

Jericho comes in to even things out but it lets the champions take over. Benoit is like screw that and pounds them back, hooking the Crossface on Austin. HHH comes in with a big chair shot to break it up but Benoit kicks out to a big pop. Benoit goes into the steps for no count as he kicks out before the one. Austin pounds away on him and it’s off to HHH who hooks a cheating abdominal stretch.

 

Make that a sleeper as Benoit is in big trouble. Benoit manages to fire off a suplex to put both guys down and an enziguri is good enough for the hot tag to Jericho….but the referee doesn’t see it. The fans don’t like that at all. Jericho goes off with Austin on the floor as HHH hits the Pedigree. There’s no referee though so Jericho goes up and takes HHH’s head off with a missile dropkick.

 

There’s your hot tag to Jericho and he takes on the now legal Austin and HHH at the same time. Thesz Press is countered into a spinebuster and then the Walls but HHH makes the save. That right there, that save, resulted in HHH tearing his quad off the bone and would put him out of action until January of 2002. You could see HHH’s leg just stop moving. His leg is dead weight now.

 

HHH is like screw this potentially career ending injury and goes to set up the announce table. HHH loads up the Pedigree but Jericho counters into the Walls on the table, and remember that HHH has a torn muscle. FREAKING OW MAN!!! Benoit hits the swan dive on Austin but there’s no referee. Stunner to Benoit gets two as Jericho pulls the referee out. Lionsault gets knees and HHH finds the sledgehammer from somewhere. The second Lionsault hits but the hammer hits Austin and Jericho gets the pin and the titles as the place erupts!

 

Rating: A+. WOW this match holds up really well. After Jericho gets that hot tag, this is full speed ahead the rest of the way. The energy in this is great as they did everything they could to keep the Canadians down but in the end, HHH messes up to end it. Notice one very important thing here: Jericho had Austin (presumably) beat with the Lionsault, so it’s not like they got dominated the entire time and won on a mistake by the other team. That’s huge and it makes Benoit/Jericho look far stronger as the new champions.

We’re four matches in and the lowest rating is an A. That’s insane and we’ve got a bunch of great matches to go.

Rikishi gives us the top five kisses of the year.

5. Regal kisses Vince to open Vince’s club.

4. Lita kisses Matt.

3. Rock makes Vince kiss Rikishi to “close” Vince’s club.

2. Rock kisses Trish. That looked like something from Hollywood and of course it went nowhere.

1. Angle gets his gold medals back out of Benoit’s tights and he kisses him. Angle is always great at comedy.

We get a look at things that are in movies that the WWF also has with a highlight package of each. We get music, romance, betrayal, revenge, toilet humor and old-fashioned fun which is pretty much a bunch of “funny” moments. This runs about five minutes in total and is actually pretty funny. There’s WAY too much stuff in it to list though.

We get a quick look back at Tough Enough with Maven and Nidia winning. If you don’t remember them, that shouldn’t surprise you at all. I did really like the theme song though. One of the male runners up is more famous as Josh Matthews.

#6: No Mercy – Torrie Wilson vs. Stacy Keibler

This is a lingerie match which means they wrestle in it. Let’s get this over with. I can’t stand these kind of matches. I mean, the girls look great but when I can see them in even less for free on the internet, what’s the point? Stacy has a riding crop or something and spanks Torrie and the referee. They “wrestle” for a bit and exchange a bunch of rollups. Torrie wins with a handspring elbow. This was worthless.

Ok so not everything was great. The girls looked hot though.

We get a video of Rock returning to the WWF and Rock Bottoming both Vince and Shane before joining the WWF.

#5: Survivor Series – TeamAlliancevs. TeamWWF

After literally ten minutes of introductions, we’re ready to go. Stephanie dancing to Booker’s music was either funny, hot, or just plain sad. I can’t decide. Immediately it’s Rock vs. Austin, which makes sense I suppose as they’re the real core of this feud. Before you get any other ideas, this isn’t WWF vs. Alliance. It’s a WWF angle, plain and simple. Both guys hit the Thesz Press and the F U elbow with Shane saving Austin despite him not particularly needing it.

Booker vs. Rock follows as we redo Summerslam from this year. Booker was the WCW Rock, complete with the catchphrase to open his song, the People’s Champion mantra, and the finishing move. And that is reason 384 why WCW failed. I need to make a list of that someday. Shane saves Booker this time, so at least that makes sense. WCW violence erupts as Jericho beats up Booker for a bit.

Ross and Heyman argue over who put ECW out of business which is amusing, mainly because according to storyline purposes it’s still in business but whatever. RVD gets a pop and a half. Jericho and Van Dam have a good little match here, as Jericho is wrestling his light weight style which is where I always thought he was best. Today he tends to use the heavyweight style which just doesn’t work that well for me. Jericho hooks the Walls on a counter and Heyman is PANICKING.

Shane of course makes the save though. After a double tag it’s Kane vs. Angle which is an interesting match to say the least. Angle was in between stages in his career here as he’s somewhere between All American good boy and rampaging psycho that knows more ways to hurt people that should be legal. He had recently made Kane tap and Angle Slammed Big Show, so obviously he was on a role at the moment.

Also, this was just after he and Austin had finished an awesome feud with Angle hitting levels of intensity in promo cutting that I didn’t know existed. Those two beat the living tar out of each other, throwing each other all over the place with suplex after suplex in something that was just plain awesome. And because this is pro wrestling they’re friends a month later. Just as I say this, Angle gets a sweet German on Kane. Shane saves Angle as that’s number four.

Now we’re up to Taker and Angle, which is nothing short of a classic most of the time except for when it’s not. Taker hits a sweet kick to Booker’s head to take him down, and of course Shane makes the save again. It makes sense if nothing else though, as he’s the guy with everything to lose. Taker goes for Old School as evidenced by shouting OLD SCHOOL! I really don’t get the point of him doing that. It’s not like he used a wristlock that often.

After Shane makes another save to save us from Booker and Taker’s slow section, Austin comes in. The fans are still way into him, which goes to show how popular he was. Austin vs. Taker really was an epic rivalry. It’s kind of reminiscent of Hogan and Andre when you think about it. You have the big vocal face of the company vs. the guy that’s great but stays in the background most of the time. It’s a simple story but it goes in depth once you look into it a bit.

After the second Old School in about three minutes, Shane…oh screw it you know what he does by now. Taker just starts punching the heck out of Angle which never gets old. Heyman finally does what everyone has wanted to do for years and asks JR what the deal is with his obsession with taking men to the woodshed. Ross has nothing to say as Big Show comes in for the first time, rocking that one piece swimsuit he used to wear.

Naturally he lasts about a minute as an Angle Slam, axe kick, 5 Star and a Shane elbow drop end him to make it 5-4. Can the forces of evil really overcome the forces of good? Dang if I know as there’s at least half an hour left in this match. In a funny moment after the pin, Shane is dancing around celebrating as Rock is waiting on him. The Alliance guys point it out to him and he slowly stops dancing before turning around and looking scared. That was great.

Rock’s punches seem to miss by about a mile to me, but maybe I’m missing something. After a Kane chokeslem, a Taker tombstone and a Lionsault, we’re tied up. Heyman as usual is priceless during this. Angle comes in now as we need a spatula for Shane. I love how Heyman is freaking despite the fact that Shane got the same treatment that Show got earlier. Also I love how he complains about how stupid Show is, despite him taking Show in as the ECW Champion in about five years.

It’s Angle vs. Jericho now in another match that has a natural rivalry that I’ll never get tired of watching. I’ve come to the conclusion that Booker is just flat out boring. He’s been in there about three times now and he’s just killed the momentum every single time. He’s slow and boring, which is a bad combination to consist of.

Ross points out the same thing I noticed earlier about how the WWF is mainly power, which makes sense as most of the Alliance guys are finesse or technical guys, which is either a very subtle and nice touch, or a complete coincidence. The WWF team beats up RVD, prompting Heyman to say he believes they’re trying to isolate him. Well thank you very much for that. I never would have noticed.

Booker and RVD are in at the same time with Kane, who naturally gets no help from his partners because, you know, that would be helpful. Van Dam had pinned Kane and Taker this past week, so he’s hot right now which is kind of a joke considering Kane is in there, but it wasn’t that funny. I need to work on my comedy more I think.

The Five Star (which is still the most amazing live move I’ve ever seen) hits but Kane grabs Van Dam by the throat, leading to Booker running in, which leads to the massive brawl that you knew was coming. During the fracas, Van Dam hits a kick from the top to eliminate Kane. In a cool moment, Taker has one member of the Alliance in each of the corners and keeps them there by running back and forth, clotheslining them all in order.

He does about eight clotheslines in a row before knocking Booker to the floor. Angle takes a Last Ride but Booker comes in with a chair. Taker knocks him down but walks into the Stunner. Angle is dragged over and despite not being legal, gets the pin. That takes us down to Rock and Jericho vs. Austin, Booker, RVD and Angle. Dang that’s a lot of gold between six guys. Booker kicks/knees the heck out of Rock.

Rock hits a DDT and covers Booker but it doesn’t work, which it shouldn’t have any way as Booker’s shoulder was about right inches off the mat. Booker is thrown into Angle, allowing him to be rolled up to make it 3-2. I like that actually, as it’s not something stupid and it actually makes sense for Booker to go out that way.

Rock hooks a cool move on Van Dam as RVD’s back was to the Great One and Rock more or less powerbombs him down, but does it with one arm so it’s like a roll up from the top which gets two. Jericho is finally back in and they nearly botch a spot, but Jericho makes a last second save to turn it into a swinging neckbreaker. That was nice. In a sequence that’s just flat out awesome due to what it means now.

Jericho avoids a split legged moonsault and hits the Breakdown for the pin on Van Dam, which looked awful because Van Dam dropped to a knee so the move got ZERO reaction. The reason it’s cool is Van Dam missed what is now Morrison’s finisher to get caught in Miz’s finisher. That’s awesome and one of the biggest reasons I love watching old wrestling. You get to see stuff like that which wouldn’t have meant a thing eight years ago but now is kind of cool, or at least it is to me.

Who would have guessed it would come down to the four guys that have been fighting on both sides? We have two fights going on at once, with Austin hitting a slingshot on Rock, who of course oversells by more or less throwing a flying headbutt into the post. Heyman says they can find a spot for Rock if nothing else for his t-shirt sales.

We move to Austin vs. Jericho which is a feud that could have been great but never happened, I guess due to a generation gap. I think I might see why now as they badly botch a spot and the bad attempt at a save just fails miserably.

Jericho and Angle are in there now and Jericho hooks the ankle lock as we continue to shame the history of Ken Shamrock, who would win the TNA World Title in about nine months. Actually it was the NWA World Title at the time, but it was exclusive to TNA so whatever. The heels take their time beating on Jericho which at least makes sense. It’s fairly slow and boring, but it’s working to an extent I suppose.

We get a double hot tag to give us Rock vs. Angle. Rock hits the awful belly to belly to set up the even worse Sharpshooter to which Angle shockingly taps. More on that later. Since Rock is a jerk, he won’t let go until Austin knocks him off. Heyman’s panicking is just great here. Jericho can’t get the Walls, but Austin does of all things, but they last about a second. Austin is bleeding, and of course it’s profusely since it’s PPV.

Since it hasn’t been mentioned all match, we suddenly remember that Austin might be jumping, despite Vince saying it was nonsense. Austin counters Jericho’s roll up into one of his own, and wouldn’t you know it, the final two are Rock and Austin. For the life of me, I NEVER would have seen this as the final two. Ok that’s a lie but whatever. As Austin and Rock are getting going, Jericho hits Rock with the Breakdown, which technically should be a DQ.

Actually it shouldn’t be since it’s his own team so never mind. Rock naturally kicks out. Jericho heads back to the ring but Taker comes out for the save. That’s a feud that sadly never happened. They just had their first match in September of this year. That’s saying a lot. If Rock ever sold any big spot properly I think I’d have a heart attack. I get the point in doing it, but it’s just way too much most of the time, at least in my eyes.

They fight to the floor and land in the most famous of all places. Rock lands some punches square in the shoulder of Austin which for some reason keep him down. Ross and Heyman are just laying into each other on commentary and it’s great. I have no issue with the announcers being biased in circumstances like this. Austin hooks a bad Sharpshooter because we have to have a Montreal reference at every major show in history.

Austin isn’t even leaning back on it so it just looks like Rock has his legs up. There’s no heat on the move at all from the crowd because it looks so awful and no one buys that Rock is in a lot of pain at all. A belt shot from Austin misses and it’s the third bad Sharpshooter of the night. Man is this some golden edition of the Montreal reference package or something? It’s a sad thing when Rock’s Sharpshooter is better than someone else’s but that’s the case here.

In a cool scene, Austin has the WWF belt and is holding onto it as he tries to get to the ropes. For once, Ross points something out and says being champion is Austin’s life and is the reason he won’t tap. That’s just wrong because it’s been made clear that champions won’t get fired, but at least Ross is trying. In a stupid thing, Austin gets the ropes but Rock pulls him away, so Hebner keeps checking for the submission. Yeah that makes a lot of sense.

On the second time though Earl makes him break it. What’s the point of that? Y am I wasting my time trying to figure this out? Since it’s Rock vs. Austin, Rock hits a Stunner, allegedly on the inventor of it, but I don’t see Mikey Whipwreck anywhere. Nick Patrick runs out to pull Hebner out to prevent the three as Heyman says he’s a licensed official.

For some reason the idea of taking the test for your refereeing license amuses me. What’s the test like? If you mess up more than three counts you don’t pass? Do you have to learn how many taps there are in a proper tap out? Ok it’s not as funny as I thought it was. Austin hits a Rock Bottom of his own but of course he kicks out. Austin beats up Patrick, because that’s just what he does.

Since it’s a major PPV, Hebner goes down. Rock takes another Stunner and amazingly only oversells a bit. There’s no referee though as I wonder why Vince doesn’t just call for the bell on his own. It’s his show, so it’s not like it would be mind blowing. Angle runs out and screws the Alliance by hitting Austin with the belt straight into the Rock Bottom for the perfectly timed conscious Hebner to end the Alliance. The crowd was electric over this.

Heyman is at a loss for words, which shows how huge of a moment this is. Ross screams that Heyman is out of work AGAIN, which is great. Fink’s announcement of the winning organization is absolutely perfect. Stephanie is crying badly as the WWF guys are celebrating. What I meant earlier was that Angle was apparently sent into the Alliance by Vince, and it turned out that Angle, not Austin, was the one that would turn all along.

This wound up ticking off Taker, setting up his heel turn and massive haircut. Oh look, it’s Vince to take credit for something that he played absolutely zero part in. It’s good to know that some things never change. The sight of Vince holding up his arms in triumph in a WCW town no less takes us out.

Rating: B. The two problems here are very obvious. First of all, there was zero chance that the WWF would lose. Second, it was beyond obvious that it would come down to Austin vs. Rock in their I guess 23rd PPV ending fight. The match itself is good if not very good, but there’s just no drama whatsoever, which they clearly tried to put in by having Jericho and Rock against four guys and then Jericho screwing Rock.

Even still though, the ending was never once in doubt. I get that it had to be that way, but they booked themselves into a huge corner here and it showed badly. I don’t think this could have been a classic, but it was about as good as it could have been.

To give you an idea of how much these matches are being clipped, that match ran roughly an hour counting entrances. Here’s it’s about eight minutes.

Trish gives us the top five slaps of the year.

5. Debra slaps Vince for saying she’s the exception for the behind every great man there’s a great woman saying.

4. Molly slaps Austin for calling her a bimbo.

3. Debra slaps Undertaker for being a jerk. She slaps him twice.

2. Trish slaps Vince to turn face at Wrestlemania.

1. Stephanie slaps Linda who apparently is weaker than a referee, being knocked out by a single slap.

Back to the matches.

#4: InVasion – HardcoreTitle: RobVanDamvs. JeffHardy

Why all the TNA on TNA violence? RVD’s outfit is tiger print of all things tonight. He looks like Tony the Tiger in spandex. This should be fun. Hardy isn’t a huge deal yet but he’s in the midcard. Van Dam is WAY over. Crowd is red hot for this as it was more or less the second featured match on the card. Hardy goes for his run the rail spot and Van Dam makes the stop by jumping up on it to stop him. Nice.

Into the crowd now. This is totally sloppy and totally a mess but since it’s a hardcore match, it’s working rather well actually. The crowd is helping it a lot also. Van Dam takes a bow which is a very nice touch. With Van Dam on the apron, Hardy slingshots over the ropes into a powerbomb to the floor. Sweet looking spot and it’s ladder time. This had to happen. In another sick spot, Hardy is on the top of the ladder, and I mean the big one, and is pushed off and crashes to the floor.

This was what gave us the “How do you learn to fall off a 20ft ladder” soundbyte. In another, say it with me, sick spot, Van Dam is crouched but jumps into the air for a Van Daminator that looked GREAT. It knocked Hardy through the hole into the stage to the floor. We’ve reached the part where it’s just them beating the living crap out of each other and the fan are flat out eating it up.

The belt is in the ring as Hardy gets a nice German Suplex. Jeff is bleeding a bit. Swanton misses. With Jeff down, Van Dam puts the belt on Hardy’s chest and hits the 5 Star for the pin. Fun match.

Rating: B+. This is a great example of a match where you have to consider what was going on out there. This wasn’t meant to be a mat clinic or anything. This was about high impact, high intensity over the top spots and that’s what the fans got. This was fun and the crowd loved it. Great match.

Rock is in the back on the phone and notices the camera. Apparently he’s hosting a top five segment but forgot he agreed to do it. It’s the top five put downs of the year but he abuses the guy holding the boom mic for a bit first. The guy is taller than Rock but he’s wearing a WCW shirt. Rock makes him remove it. Rock: “GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY PUT THE SHIRT BACK ON!”

5. Rock to Stephanie about how cheap of a sl** she is.

4. Edge to X-Pac: “1998 called and they’re sick of you too so come join us in 2001.”

3. Big Show imitates Positive DDP.

2. Jericho making fun of Stephanie’s breast implants. Jericho ripping Stephanie never gets old.

1. Rock rips Booker T for being stupid. Rock: “Teacher asks what’s 2+2. Booker T says THOMAS JEFFERSON SUCKA!”

#3: Wrestlemania – WWF World Heavyweight Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

This is made No DQ just before the match starts which is a surprise to everyone and it comes back to play a factor later. JR’s saying WHAT as soon as that’s announced made me laugh quite loudly. The glass shatters and the ovation is deafening. Austin is so over it’s amazing. He hits the first corner and the pop grows somehow. He turns around to cross the ring and it’s as if everything goes into slow motion. Austin climbs to the middle rope, throws two fingers into the air, and the flashbulbs go insane. It’s that moment that defines this whole show I think.

 

All of the other great matches all night long, from the wrestling classic to the ladders to the war we just saw, none of that means anything anymore and every single eye in the building is on this man right here. It’s the peak of Steve Austin’s popularity and it’s amazing to say the very least. JR’s commentary is absolutely perfect here. It’s that perfect voice that we all know, but the words simply couldn’t be better. He builds this match up to be as epic as it should be. The music ends, and we hear the sound of his opponent.

Rock comes out to an INCREDIBLY mixed reaction. He’s either being cheered all the way to heaven or being booed out of the building. Not sure which. He hits the corner, throws the belt over his shoulder with his arm raised in the air, and we get the staredown from one side of the ring to the other. The feeling is all there too. You can tell what you’re watching is absolutely epic and it feel just right.

 

The fight starts almost immediately with Austin jumping Rock as he gets off the ropes. Thesz Press takes down Rock seconds into it but Rock fights back with a swinging neckbreaker. Rock Bottom and Stunner both don’t connect and we hit the floor. Out into the crowd they go with neither guy keeping an advantage at all. Back to the ring now with Austin having a brief advantage.

 

Superplex gets two and Austin takes the turnbuckle pad off. Rock fights back to massive booing and a clothesline for two. Back out to the floor again and Austin gets a shot with the bell to take Rock down. Rock is sent onto the table which breaks on a delay so the camera misses it. This is so epic. These two are the biggest stars in the world and this is the biggest match of the year. What more can you ask for?

 

Austin hits a neckbreaker for two. Mudhole stomping commences but Rock comes flying out with a clothesline to huge boos. More slugging it out with Rock in control now. Rock grabs the bell and gets a shot to the head with it for two. Austin is busted open and Rock hammers away. Oh man he’s bleeding BAD. Back to the floor again and they fight it out even more.

 

Another important thing to note is Ross. Ross has been mostly reserved all night but now he’s pouring it on. This makes this look FAR more interesting and intense while at the same time not diminishing the other stuff. Austin gets a slingshot to send Rock into the post. Monitor to the head and Rock is down on the floor. THAT gets two.

 

Austin flips Rock off and gets caught in the Sharpshooter for his efforts. Rock is busted now too. Great throwback here to Mania 13 as Austin screams in the hold. Rock pulls him back to the middle and Austin is in big trouble. Finally there’s the rope. Now Austin throws it on Rock and the people are loving it. After it gets broken it goes on again and this time it’s a rope used to escape. HUGE booing when he gets there too.

 

The Million Freaking Dollar Dream goes on and the bloody Rock is in trouble. Rock pushes off the corner ala Bret vs. Austin at Survivor Series 96 but this time Austin kicks out. Little things like those make matches AWESOME. Rock gets a Stunner out of nowhere for two.

 

And now we set up the ending as Vince McMahon is here. Both guys get spinebusters but Rock’s sets up the People’s Elbow. Vince slides in and breaks that up though, shocking everyone. Rock chases Vince but runs into a Rock Bottom from Austin for two. Crowd is losing it on these kickouts. Stunner is blocked and there goes the referee again.

 

A low blow puts Rock down and Austin asks Vince for a chair. Vince cracks Rock with it as the crowd isn’t sure what to do. Vince puts the referee back in but THAT gets two. A Rock Bottom out of nowhere but Vince has the referee. Rock pulls Vince in but walks into another Stunner for ANOTHER two. Austin is all ticked off now and Vince hands him a chair, drilling Rock with it for two. Austin absolutely explodes, drilling Rock with the chair an insane 19 times and getting the academic pin for the title. Rock is DEAD.

 

Rating: A+. The repeated finishers and chair shots hurt this quite a bit, but the crowd, the commentary and the overall feeling push this to the sky easily. Epic feeling the whole match and the crowd was in the palm of their hands. Not great wrestling, but the crowd carries this to greatness.

Austin and Vince shake hands, ending the Attitude Era and also ending the superpower that WWE was and marking the beginning of the decline of the company. They share a beer and another Stunner to Rock ends this very long but incredible show.

Cole says three matches are from Wrestlemania. I’m 99% sure I know the two remaining matches now.

Debra has the top five food moments.

5. Jericho hits Stephanie with a pie.

4. Debra hits Austin with a cookie sheet. That was a great shot too.

3. MILK-A-MANIA!!!

2. Austin vs. Booker in the grocery store. That’s a favorite of mine.

1. Rock talks to Lillian about strudel. He asks her if she would like some and she’s gone, saying she’d love it more than anything. Rock asks for a little professionalism.

I was right about the first of the two matches.

 

#2: Wrestlemania – TagTitles: Edge/Christianvs. HardyBoysvs. DudleyBoys

This is yet another match with no story but it never needed one. These three teams all wanted to be the champions and this match was fairly obvious. The Dudleys come in as champions here. All four faces jump the Canadians to get us going here. The Dudleys hit a flapjack to Christian as the beating is on. The Hardys take down the Dudleys for awhile until Edge and Christian bring in a ladder.

 

Edge grabs a chair and he and Christian stand on Matt’s balls in the corner. A double drop toehold by the Canadians puts Jeff into the chair. Edge tries to get the belts but Jeff makes the save. The Hardys get a double baseball slide into a ladder into the Dudleys on the floor. Using a pair of ladders, Matt drops a leg and Jeff drops a splash on Christian at the same time. Nice move.

 

There goes Matt’s shirt and there go the girls. What’s Up to Edge And now it’s table time. Edge is laid out on one so Bubba picks up Jeff and powerbombs him right through Edge and in turn the table. On the floor now and the Dudleys stack up two tables on top of two more tables for the big spot later in the match. Paul talks about Big Daddy Dudley’s construction company in Dudleyville. Oh dear.

 

More ladders are brought in and in a spot that still makes me and the crowd breathe in, Bubba takes a ladder and just bashes Matt in the head with it. That has to hurt. All six guys go up at once and all six guys come crashing down almost at once with some hitting ropes, some hitting mat and some hitting ropes. Christian goes flying to the floor which looks AWESOME from the above the ring camera.

 

He sets up a table on the floor as Edge tries to go up. Spike Dudley who was injured by Edge and Christian’s friend Rhyno, comes out and takes down Edge and hits a Dudley Dog to Christian through the table. Jeff goes up but it’s Rhyno out now for the save. Gee I wonder who will come out to help out the Hardys. Rhyno destroys everyone and here’s Lita.

 

She stops Edge from going up but gets caught in a gorilla press by Rhyno. Spike saves her and it’s a Litarana for Rhyno. Spike hits Rhyno with a chair and he falls into a ladder, sending Edge down. Dudleyville (Doomsday) Device to Rhyno and he’s finally down. Lita takes her top off (looking incredibly good in a black bra) but walks into a 3D. Chair shots by the Canadians take out the Dudleys and Edge wants the big ladder.

 

Jeff gets the large ladder though and hits a Swanton onto Rhyno and Spike who are both on tables. Spike takes the whole thing and Rhyno’s table doesn’t even break. That was ALL Spike. The big ladder is in the ring now and set up in the middle of the ring. Christian and D-Von go up but Matt moves the ladder under them (with a shout of HERE WE GO first) and they’re stuck hanging there.

 

After both fall, Jeff walks across the top of the three other ladders (kind of as the third one falls) to get to the titles. The big ladder is in the corner and Jeff goes up a regular one. The ladder is moved by Bubba and since Jeff’s feet were on it, Jeff goes swinging in the opposite direction, right into a spear by Edge from the super ladder, which is not only Edge’s Wrestlemania moment, but the moment that made him a star.

 

Back after about 5 replays with Bubba and Matt going up the big ladder. Rhyno shoves the ladder over and they go crashing through the four tables that were set up at ringside earlier. D-Von and Christian go up but Rhyno gets beneath Christian and climbs up with Christian on his shoulders, giving him the needed assist to win the titles again. Incredible match all around to say the least.


Rating: A+. These guys nearly killed each other. You can see that it’s miles better than last year because they knew what they were doing to a greater extent. That spear from Edge more or less ended Christian’s usefulness in the WWF as Edge began to get the singles push from here on out.

 

Either way, this match is great as it’s a total spot fest but it is still better than all of the MITB matches that would follow in its footsteps. If you’re bored here, go get a blood injection. The crowd ate this up and it just clicks all around as they somehow top the other matches they had which are also greats.

We got a lot more of that match and with a lot of time left, if the #1 match is what I think it is, we can fit almost all of it in.

We get a highlight reel of Austin saying WHAT. That’s a pretty great catchphrase for how big it was in 2001.

I was right about #1 too.

#1: No Way Out – Steve Austin vs. HHH

First fall is a regular match, second is street fight, third is cage. MASSIVE pop for Austin, but the crowd has been white hot all night. I’m surprised that this is in the middle of the card but you know it’s going to get some time. Maybe they want to do this so the crowd isn’t spent at the end? Naturally it’s a slugfest to start. Mudhole is stomped 30 seconds in. Big old AUSTIN chant as he dominates early on.

Modified hot shot to take down Austin though as this is fast paced for the most part. Pedigree is blocked into a DDT on the arm which I need to learn the name of. We head to the floor as Austin works the arm. This is a regular match but Austin ramming HHH’s arm into a post about 6 times is perfectly fine? HHH can’t do the Pedigree because of his arm, which is SELLING! Simply shaking your arm is passable, but having it prevent you from doing your moves is SELLING.

Thesz Press and Austin is dominant so far. HHH gets his foot up when Austin is coming off the ropes, but for once Austin actually has his arms up to look like he’s doing a move. I hate when people just jump into it for the sake of jumping into it. Neckbreaker takes HHH down but it doesn’t do much due to the weak arm.

HHH goes after the knee which is Austin’s weak point as well. He goes for the leg into the post thing but Austin counters and HHH and the nose of doom hit the post. Back to the knee as HHH takes over with a figure four. Austin gets out and does a nice move where he gets HHH n the mat and beats on him with his leg. Cooler than it sounds. Thesz Press and the elbow get two.

Everyone counters everything and we slug it out. HHH gets a kick to the knee and goes to the middle rope. He jumps into the boot though and Austin hits the Stunner for the completely clean pinfall.

No rest period between falls and we’re right back at it again. It’s a street fight now and we hit the floor. Austin’s knee is ok I guess as he hits some suplexes on the floor. Monitor connects with HHH’s head and apparently it’s broken. Naturally we head into the crowd and it’s all Austin. Back in the ring and Austin destroys HHH Rock-Style with a chair.

After nearly murdering HHH we head back to the floor where Austin finds a 2×4 wrapped in barbed wire for no apparent reason. A low blows allows HHH to blast him in the face with it though and Austin is bleeding. HHH sets for the Pedigree on the table but Austin counters and sends him through the other table which EXPLODES. Awesome stuff so far if you can’t tell.

Back in the ring a bell shot (Austin brought it in earlier) gets two for HHH. This is a war with both guys hitting all these big shots out of desperation. Back to the neck with a neckbreaker onto the chair for two. Backdrop by Austin sends HHH free falling over the top. Cool looking drop. More weapons stuff on the floor but the intensity and selling is making it work.

You can barely hear Lawler here as his mic is messed up or something. HHH finds a sledgehammer and Lawler accuses JR for putting it there. Back in the ring again and a Stunner is blocked by a sledgehammer shot to Austin’s head. Pedigree follows that and thankfully that ties us up at 1-1. I would have rolled my eyes very heavily if Austin had kicked out of that.

The cage is lowered as we get a quick break. It’s been about 30 minutes so far and nothing but awesome. Austin is more or less dead and eats the cage again. HHH gets the barbed wire 2×4 and rips Austin’s face open a bit more with it. The sledgehammer and at least one chair are also in there with them. Make that two chairs, one of which saves Austin as he blasts HHH in the head with it.

HHH gets it in the face (I would have thought that would have been Stephanie but whatever) for a long time but gets a DDT out of desperation onto the chair but it only gets two. The crowd is a bit silent but it’s pretty clear that the fans know nothing is going to end without something huge. Austin comes back and goes OFF on HHH who just collapses face first out of the corner.

Game tries to bale but he Austin makes two saves, culminating with an old school slam off the top rope. Stunner is blocked but the Pedigree hits for TWO. The place erupts on the kickout and HHH is shocked. Another is blocked and HHH gets hit with a slingshot into the cage. Stunner hits and both guys are out. After the break Austin covers for two as this is awesome. HHH gets the hammer and Austin gets the 2×4. Both swing with everything they’ve got and connect, but HHH falls on Austin for the pin. I think I need a cigarette.

Rating: A+. Without question, this is awesome. Any of the three falls is great to say the least and the ending was perfect. Both guys are protected but not in a way that makes it look like they’re being protected. HHH got lucky and won it, as Lawler says that it’s not fair to say either guy really won. Just an absolute WAR with these two beating the living heck out of each other and making the crowd love every minute of it. With 40 minutes of these two beating each other to death, how is it not a perfect match?

Ten matches and absolutely nothing from Smackdown. Austin vs. Benoit can’t make the list? Well to be fair it was fan voted and I don’t think many people watched Smackdown back then.

Lawler and Cole wrap things up.

Overall Rating: A+. Look at the ratings I give this and tell me what you think I’m saying this is. A DVD of the full versions of these matches wouldn’t stay on the shelves long enough, although it would be roughly seven hours long if you included entrances. The impressive thing is they left off A TON of stuff. When three of the best ten matches are from Wrestlemania and they left some good stuff off that show too, you know it’s a great show. Anyway this is great and almost everything from 2001 is mentioned here. Check this show out, but have Youtube open to see the full versions of the matches.

2001 was a very important year for the WWF, but overall it’s looked back on as a year of lost opportunities. At the end of the day, Vince McMahon owned WCW and ECW and ran the biggest angle of all time inside of six months and botched it worse than anything has ever been botched. You could very easily call this the worst blunder in the history of wrestling and get very few arguments. That’s the legacy of 2001 and that’s a shame.

It’s a shame because as you can see here, there was some AMAZING wrestling in the year, possibly better than any other year. The whole feuds of Rock vs. Jericho, Benoit vs. Austin and Jericho vs. Austin are only touched on here and those matches alone were match of the year candidates. This was an excellent in ring year and you would have some great times going back and checking out these ten plus a lot more matches from the year. The problem is the blown chances overshadow that stuff and it brings the rest of the year down.

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On This Day: December 30, 2011 – Smackdown: Orton Takes A Little Trip

Smackdown
Date: December 30, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

It’s the final show of the year and we close things out with the Blue Guys. As long as it’s not Blue Meanie I’m cool with that. Anyway tonight we should get some advancement in the three way world title feud. I hope they don’t make Bryan look like a joke in this that can’t get in any offense and has to escape with whatever kind of win he can get. Those title reigns completely defeat the purpose of being a champion. Then again so does MITB in general but whatever. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about Barrett vs. Orton. Their match tonight is the main event and it’s falls count anywhere. I’m curious to see how this ends, which I’m sure you’ve heard about already.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is the number 2012, since I’ll be writing 2011 for at least two more weeks.

Here’s Booker coming out to do commentary. You know, his job. I wonder if he gets his pay docked for being late like this. He talks about how this has been a great year for him, starting with the Rumble and then joining the commentary booth. Then on Monday he beat Cody Rhodes and that’s all because of the fans. He goes for his catchphrase but here’s Cody to interrupt him.

Cody makes fun of local spots teams and the Indy 500 because that’s what heels do. No seriously, it’s a fine way to get the crowd booing you so why not do it? Rhodes talks about his year, ranging from being injured to beating Mysterio to winning the IC Title. Then he took a washed up announcer and pushed him to regain some of his former glory. Booker says that when he beat Cody on Monday, he wasn’t that washed up. If Cody respected the business, he’d be congratulating Booker right now.

The champ actually agrees and says that he doesn’t want to come off as some kind of bitter jerk because he’s better than that. He actually congratulates Booker and offers a handshake. Booker shakes it and gets in his face a bit but turns to leave. Cody says of course now this is all over. Booker isn’t sure what he means by that, but Cody says the fairy tale is over and Booker is nothing but a nostalgia act. If Booker keeps competing, his skills will be exposed as being gone. If he goes back to announcing, he’ll be exposed as an illiterate moron. In short, Booker is a joke.

Cue….Dustin Rhodes? He comes out to the Goldust music but he’s in a suit and no makeup. Dustin says he loves his brother very much but Cody is going about this all wrong. Booker is someone that Cody should respect because it was Booker that inspired Dustin to face his demons and make a comeback. Dustin gets the idea of building your own legacy, but don’t do it at Booker’s expense. Cody knows better than this.

Cody chuckles at this and says that as soon as Booker stopped teaming with him, Dustin fell back into those demons and then into utter obscurity. Booker gets in Cody’s face and asks for a third match with Cody since it’s one apiece at the moment. He wants to do it right now but Cody says we’ll do it next week. Booker says that next week it’ll be a celebration when he becomes the new Intercontinental Champion. Booker leaves and Cody beats Dustin down. Booker makes the save but Cody is long gone. Not a bad opening segment.

Tonight’s main event: it’s a tag team match!

Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal

If DiBiase is supposed to be this everyman now, shouldn’t he lose the I’m Rich theme song? They exchange quick control to start but Mahal keeps his, hitting a Vader Bomb knee drop for two. The crowd isn’t exactly thrilled by DiBiase vs. Legs Mahal here. Ted gets in a few shots to slow Mahal down but tweeks his knee coming off the top. A Downward Spiral (so fed up with that move) sets up the Camel Clutch and Dibiase surprisinly taps at 2:50. Didn’t see that one coming.

Teddy is talking about his New Year’s Eve party tomorrow night when Aksana comes in. More flirtations are made and Drew McIntyre comes in. He’s been signed back to Smackdown and Teddy is willing to forgive him. Drew isn’t going to get paid what he was getting earlier when his career has fallen apart. He gets Big Zeke tonight and if he doesn’t win, his job might be in jeopardy. Drew talks about the time he made Teddy beg for mercy and says that’s nothing compared to what he’ll do to Jackson.

Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn vs. Natalya/Tamina

Tamina looks better with straight hair. The lack of JTG helps a lot also. Tamina vs. Kaitlyn starts us off. The evil ones take over on Kaitlyn and beat her down. Something like a Michinoku Driver by Natalya does nothing here as Kaitlyn makes the tag about two seconds later. Alicia hits the axe kick on Nattie for the pin at 1:34. Why do they bother with these matches? I honestly don’t know.

Tamina beats up Natalya post match, including a Superfly Splash.

Don’t be a bully.

Raw ReBound eats up some time.

We get a standard recap of Show vs. Otunga on Monday with Henry coming in as well. Bryan made the save.

Speaking of Bryan, he’s in the back talking with AJ (who looks GREAT tonight in a black cut off top and jeans) about how he saved Big Show. Show comes up and asks to talk to Bryan alone. Show says that giants don’t really need to be saved. Teddy comes in and says that the tag match main event won’t be happening tonight as Otunga wants a rematch with Show. Henry will be in his corner. Bryan implies he’ll have Show’s back but doesn’t exactly say it.

Justin Gabriel vs. Hunico

I think there’s new music for Gabriel but I’m not 100% sure. Hunico comes out on a lowrider bicycle with his new bodyguard who used to be in FCW and is named Camacho here. I don’t remember his FCW name. Further investigations (as in I looked it up on Wikipedia) says that his name there is Donny Marlow and his dad is more famous as Meng or Haku.

Cole says he has a lot of knowledge about lowrider bicycles. Hunico gets sent to the floor and Gabriel misses a dive. Cole gives us the history of lowrider bikes and all I can think of is….why? There’s something about Eddie Munster mentioned in there. Justin misses a springboard something coming back in but hits a powerbomb style move to take over. Hunico breaks up the 450 and brings Gabriel down so that the Swanton can end this at 1:48. This was nothing and Camacho didn’t get involved at all.

Hunico/Camacho hit something like Cryme Tyme’s old finisher to leave Gabriel on the mat (Samoan Drop/neckbreaker combo).

Big Show vs. David Otunga

If nothing else we get the big knockout punch from last week which still looks great. Otunga has really long arms. Henry gets his own entrance. Show beats him down as Otunga tries to get in whatever offense he can. David bails to the floor where Henry gives him something resembling a pep talk. Back in a shoulder block puts Otunga down as does a corner splash. Henry gets on the apron to distract from the chokeslam and Otunga hits a chop block and DDT for two. Henry goes to get in the ring but Bryan pops up with a belt shot to stop him. The big punch knocks Otunga out cold at 3:24.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here and that’s about it. Bryan coming out didn’t really mean anything or add anything as it wasn’t like Show needed help. Also it doesn’t help that he looks like a mosquito who keeps running in and hitting people then running. Nothing to see here but Otunga can sell a punch really well.

Ezekiel Jackson vs. Drew McIntyre

Jackson has some hair now. We get Drew’s full entrance and I miss his song. Big Zeke controls with power for a few moments but Drew takes over pretty quickly. Jackson beats him down more and this match isn’t going to last long. A big boot by Drew gets two. Northern lights suplex gets two. Jackson backdrops him and the fans don’t care. Side slam gets two for the power man. Torture Rack is countered and Drew gets a boot up in the corner. It gets two even with his feet on the ropes. Drew argues with the ropes and Jackson rolls him up (with a big handful of tights) for the pin at 3:52.

Rating: D-. Terribly boring match here and I have no idea what the point of it was. Drew has fallen so far in the last year and a half that it’s almost scary. I don’t get the point in having Jackson use the tights but maybe it’ll be addressed in the future. Jackson is pretty worthless as he isn’t interesting at all and now he has to cheat to win matches over Drew Freaking McIntyre? Not a good match at all.

Video on Sheamus. I think they aired this months ago. I remember the rock version of Written In My Face.

Drew yells about the tights in the back and Teddy says he can’t stand losers. He’s a ticked off Peanut here. Old school fans will get that joke.

Here’s Sheamus for a little chat. “What’s the crack Indianapolis?” Is that an Irish thing? He wants to talk about the future and by that he means the Royal Rumble. The winner gets a title match at Wrestlemania. He doesn’t care who he eliminates because he’s going to win the Rumble. Cue Hornswoggle to get on my nerves. Horny is going to enter the Rumble as well because miracles like Bryan beating Big Show can happen. He says he’ll win (only saying his own name). Sheamus admires that and gives us some Irish folk lore or whatever you want to call it. He gets all mean but is only playing.

Cue Heath Slater who is a breath of air. I can’t stand Horny at all. Slater mentions guys like Bushwhacker Luke and the Brooklyn Brawler, who fall into the same category as Horny: the guy that says they’ll win and is a joke. Slater says he’s the greatest redhead on Smackdown and the only reason Horny won the battle royal was because Sheamus didn’t want to squash a leprechaun. Slater doesn’t have that problem though. Sheamus gets in his face and….sings Don’t Stop Believin. Ok then. Sheamus says he sees Slater as more of an R. Kelly kind of guy, because he believes he can fly, and there goes Slater. That was…yeah.

Sheamus vs. Heath Slater

Kind of awkward here as Sheamus was celebrating after throwing Slater out and we went to a break. Back and they’re having a match. Sheamus pounds him down and works on the arm and then throws Heath to the apron. Slater slaps him and that was very stupid, so here are ten forearms to the chest for his efforts. Sheamus keeps countering him but Slater drop toeholds him into the middle buckle. Slater gets him onto the mat and hooks a chinlock. The counter to that triggers Sheamus’ comeback which consists of forearms to the back, a top rope shoulder and the Brogue Kick for the pin at 4:45 shown.

Rating: D+. The Rumble is probably the best thing that could possibly happen to Sheamus at this point. He doesn’t have anything to do on Smackdown as it was looking like he was the next opponent for Henry but then Henry got hurt so they had to go to the Bryan reign. Since then he’s just been beating up random people without breaking a sweat, which can only get you so far.

Bryan is talking to Teddy when Show comes in. He’s getting annoyed at Bryan for always being there. Bryan wants a thank you for being there to bail Show out. They start growling at each other and we’re told that it’s Show vs. Bryan for the title next week. Show laughs a lot at that. Bryan says even if he loses, his reign lasted longer than 45 seconds.

Whoever they are, they’re still coming. I’m kind of curious about that but I’m expecting a letdown.

We hype the three big title matches spread over the next week of shows.

Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett

Falls count anywhere. Slugout to start and Orton hammers him into the corner. Out to the floor and Barrett goes into the steps for two. With Barrett’s head on the steps, a stomp gets two. Usually that would crack a skull but in wrestling it only gets two. That’s why I love this stuff. RKO is countered and Orton goes into the post as we take a break.

Back with them in the ring and Barrett hammering away. He hits that running boot to Orton as Orton is sitting on the middle rope which gets two on the floor. Big boot in the ring gets two and we hit the chinlock. Middle rope elbow gets the same. Back to the chinlock as this has been a lot more basic than I was expecting. Orton gets in the powerslam but Barrett escapes the elevated DDT by heading to the floor.

Orton throws him over the table and they go into the crowd. They go into the back and Orton goes through a table. Randy sends him into an anvil case as Barrett tries to escape down the hall. The referee went down earlier so he’s not here. They fight into an elevator and we actually cut to a security camera feed in the elevator.

They brawl out into what looks like a corporate area and a cameraman has to run to catch up to them. The camera goes through a door and we hear shouting and a crash. He catches up to them and Barrett is standing at the top of a flight of steps. Orton is laying at the bottom in a shape that probably isn’t that comfortable. The camera looks down at him as he can barely move and we go off the air.

Rating: C. Pretty boring main event for the most part but once they got to the wild brawl it wasn’t that bad. Word is Orton has a legit bad back so this is the angle that they’re going with to write him off TV for awhile. That’s fine and not having a pin works here because there’s no point in having a pin with that being the closing shot of the show. Not terrible and the ending did the job it was supposed to do.

Overall Rating: C. I wasn’t huge on this show. The point of it was to get Orton off TV for awhile and that worked out pretty well. Barrett looks great and we have a world title match set for next week. I’m honestly not sure what they’re going to do with Bryan as the way he won the title makes him look like a fluke and there’s a chance they’ll pull it off of him with a Show heel turn. Either way, not a horrible show but nothing at all worth going out of your way to see.

Results
Jinder Mahal b. Ted DiBiase – Camel Clutch
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn b. Natalya/Tamina – Axe Kick to Natalya
Hunico b. Justin Gabriel – Swanton Bomb
Big Show b. David Otunga – WMD
Drew McIntyre b. Ezekiel Jackson – Rollup
Sheamus b. Heath Slater – Brogue Kick
Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton went to a no contest

 

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2013 Awards: Wrestler of the Year

A quick one to close us out.There’s no real point to nominees here as this comes down to two people.

The winner is……..John Cena.

As well as Daniel Bryan.  At the end of the day I simply can’t pick one over the other so it’s a tie.  Let’s look at both guys.

First up we have Bryan, who got the rocket push of this generation over the course of the summer.  Bryan went from being in a very successful tag team to flying up the card, culminating in something that happens once a year at best: pinning John Cena 100% clean in the middle of the ring.  That flat out does not happen most o the time and it’s a huge deal.  After that Bryan won another world title and main evented several PPVs to close out the year.  That’s something that’s hard to top.

However, when you look at kayfabe accomplishments, Cena had a dominant year.  He won the Royal Rumble, he won the world title in the main event of Wrestlemania, he held world titles for over half the year, he main evented Summerslam and TLC plus brought the WHC its most prestige in years.  That’s a great year by anyone’s standards and a very good one for Cena.

 

I just can’t pick one guy over the other and they both deserve to be called the best wrestler of the year.  Now go ahead and call me biased.

 

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On This Day: December 28, 1997 – Starrcade 1997: How To Kill An Empire In Three Hours

Starrcade 1997
Date: December 28, 1997
Location: MCI Center, Washington, D.C.
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Dusty Rhodes, Mike Tenay

 

Tonight is WCW’s night. After a year and a half of being dominated by the NWO, tonight is the night that WCW stands up and says this is our company and you’re not taking us over. WCW has its warrior in Sting and there is no way that Hogan can stop him. Hogan has been running scared of Sting for months and tonight he’s out of places to hide. This is WCW’s night. Let’s get to it.

 

The opening video is rather awesome with Sting standing in the shadows as rain falls. He jumps off a wall and lands on a picture of Hogan. Sting picks up the bat and walks off, all while pictures of Hogan are superimposed over the screen. That’s a great visual.

 

There will be a drawing on who gets to be the referee for the main event.

 

Several WCW wrestlers are in the crowd, including Harlem Heat and the TV Champion Disco Inferno.

 

Apparently Kevin Nash isn’t here tonight. This was another big problem with the NWO: they didn’t like to lose. The original plan for Nash was to face the Giant and lose. Nash, not wanting to be pinned on PPV, decided to screw the fans out of one of the biggest matches on the show and not appear. He eventually appeared in the match at the next PPV where he was allowed to win.

 

In other words, he acted unprofessionally and screwed over the people and got his way anyway. These are the kind of things that would catch up to them in the long run. Officially Nash claimed that he had chest pains, but he’s had a tendency to have those many times over the years when he was about to lose a major match. Also considering his story has changed multiple times over the years, something tells me he wasn’t being honest. Imagine that coming from a wrestler.

 

Cruiserweight Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Dean Malenko

 

This is the culmination of a rather awesome three way feud between Malenko, Guerrero and Rey Mysterio which led to some excellent matches between the three of them. Eddie is defending here. They head to the mat to start where Eddie is good but Dean is great. Malenko takes over on the champion and fires off some right hands to the head to send Eddie back. A leg lariat gets two for Malenko and they trade control of a German suplex until Dean counters a rana into a HARD powerbomb for two.

 

Another powerbomb gets two for Dean and a snap powerslam gets the same. Eddie begs for mercy and runs to the floor for a breather. Back in and Guerrero hits a chop block on Dean’s knee to give the champion control. Dean knees his way out of a suplex and drops Guerrero stomach first over the top rope to slow him down again. A clothesline gets another two count on Eddie and it’s off to a chinlock. Make that a headscissors as the match slows down a lot.

 

Back up and Eddie backs off again before kissing Dean’s feet and begging for mercy. Dean wins a test of strength by taking Eddie’s hands to the mat so he can stomp on them. A dropkick to the face puts Guerrero down again before Dean counters a tornado DDT and drops Guerrero face first on the top turnbuckle for two. Eddie gets suplexed out to the apron but lands on his feet, allowing him to snap Dean’s neck on the ropes. The champion takes over with a slingshot ax handle onto Dean’s leg to put Malenko in trouble.

 

Guerrero wraps Dean’s knee around the post and dropkicks the steps into said knee in a nice show of aggression. Back in again and Guerrero cranks on the leg for a bit before hitting a bit powerbomb for two. Dean counters a hurricanrana attempt into a nice wheelbarrow suplex for two. A backbreaker puts Eddie down again but it hurts Dean’s knee in the process. Eddie takes him up top but gets shoved off the top as he tries a rana. Dean tries the Texas Cloverleaf (submission hold) but Eddie kicks the knee out to escape. Guerrero hits a missile dropkick into the knee to set up a Frog Splash to retain the title.

 

Rating: C+. Decent opener here but way below what you would expect from these two. The matches leading up to this one had been excellent but this came off as somewhat flat. It’s certainly not a bad match or anything, but given the expectations from the buildup, this was pretty disappointing.

 

Here’s Scott Hall with something to say. As is his custom, Hall asks the fans if they’re here to see the NWO or WCW. In this case it’s WCW but Hall would rather talk about the main event. He actually has a reason to as he gets a title shot at the winner at Uncensored. As for Nash, he isn’t here tonight so Giant is the winner. Giant comes out and says that he’s a patient man and one day Nash will be back. Hall goes after Giant but gets laid out with Kevin Nash’s powerbomb. Why they didn’t just have Hall replace Nash in a match here is beyond me.

 

Scott Norton/Vincent/Konnan vs. Ray Traylor/Steiner Brothers

 

The Steiners and Traylor had been going to war with the NWO for months so these three are just a random grouping of members for them to fight. There’s no Konnan in sight during the entrances so we’re going to start with a handicap match. Norton is a big strong guy who used to be world armwrestling champion. Vincent used to work for the WWF as Ted DiBiase’s bodyguard. The Steiners’ manager tonight? Ted DiBiase.

 

Since there’s no Konnan, here’s former world champion Randy Savage to take his place. Savage nearly gets in a fight with the WCW wrestlers in the audience on the way to the ring. For the sake of clarity in this match, Scott will only be used in reference to Scott Steiner. Savage starts with Scott with Randy being shoved back into the corner. A shoulder block puts Savage down but Norton hits Scott in the back to let Savage take over. Off to Vincent who is there to distract the referee while Savage chokes Scott.

 

Norton comes in for a power vs. power match with Scott, followed by a backbreaker to work on Scott’s back. Savage adds a double ax to the spine, only to have Scott come back with a double underhook powerbomb and a gorilla press slam. Everything breaks down and the NWO is cleared out. Back in and it’s Rick vs. Norton now which is a battle of the tough guys. Rick hits a quick suplex and a Steiner Line followed by a powerslam for two. Traylor, a former member of the NWO, comes in to pound away on Norton as well.

 

Vincent comes back in and walks into a spinebuster and a belly to back drop. Back to Scott for that wicked spinning belly to belly for no cover. Traylor comes in again as we have the rare heel in peril sequence. Rick puts on a chinlock while rubbing Vincent’s head for no apparent reason. Traylor comes back in but misses a splash, allowing for the tag off to Norton. After a big clothesline, it’s back to Vincent instead of Savage for no apparent reason.

 

To the shock of no one, Vincent is no match for Traylor and it’s hot tag to Rick. He cleans house and the Steiners hit their top rope DDT on Vincent, only to have Norton make the save. Scott hits the Frankensteiner off the top but this time Savage makes the save. Now it’s Savage in danger of being caught in the top rope Frankensteiner but Norton shoves Scott off the top, allowing Randy to drop the big elbow for the pin.

 

Rating: D+. Not a bad match or anything here, but why in the world would have have the NWO D team and Savage win this match? The Steiners are the world tag team champions and they’re losing in the second match on the biggest show of the year? This night is supposed to be all about WCW, not about the NWO winning a meaningless match that they don’t need.

 

Nick Patrick is officially announced as the referee for the main event. The problem with this is that Patrick is a former member of the NWO with a very sketchy record. Keep in mind that we’re wasting time on the biggest show of the year for this. Also, I wonder what the announcers are going to spend the next hour and a half talking about.

 

Bill Goldberg vs. Steve McMichael

 

Steve “Mongo” McMichael is a former Horseman and NFL player, but he’s absolutely terrible in the ring. Goldberg is still undefeated at this point and would become a much bigger deal after this show is over. This is happening because Goldberg stole McMichael’s Super Bowl ring and they’ve attacked each other a few times since. The brawl is on in the aisle to start but Mongo’s offense isn’t having much effect. Goldberg literally picks him up and carries Mongo into the ring like a rag doll.

 

Goldberg picks up a table at ringside as the bell rings and the actual match begins. Mongo suplexes him down for two but a big shoulder tackle takes Steve down for two. We head to the floor where the table is leaning against the post. They fight around the ring with Mongo taking over before heading back inside, only to have Goldberg punch Mongo as Steve dives off the top. Goldberg hooks a quick leg lock and is toying with Mongo at this point.

 

The spear (the setup for Goldberg’s finisher) hits for two and Goldberg loads up the table on the floor. He tries to slam Mongo over the top and through the table but the referee breaks it up. A dropkick of all things puts Mongo down and out to the floor and we have to be getting close to done. Mongo gets back up onto the apron, only to be punched through the table. Back in and the Jackhammer (suplex but instead Goldberg turns it over into a powerslam) ends Mongo.

 

Rating: D. This was terrible but Goldberg’s day was coming. It was clear that Mongo just wasn’t any good as a wrestler and thankfully in 1998 he would be pushed WAY down the card and rarely ever have a big match again. The match itself was slow and plodding, but Goldberg would be pushed to the moon very quickly after this.

 

Raven vs. Chris Benoit

 

Raven, a loner who has a collection of misfits called his Flock, comes out for his match against Chris Benoit but says he won’t wrestle tonight. Instead his top man Saturn does, which has been a recurring theme for Raven. To be fair to him and WCW though, Raven had a legit appendicitis and wasn’t medically cleared to wrestle. On the other hand, WCW knew this in advance and didn’t bother to announce that Raven couldn’t wrestle, thereby ripping off the fans with something they easily could have fixed. Anyway Benoit is a very tough wrestler with an excellent amateur skill set. Saturn can do a bit of everything.

 

Before the match, Benoit talks about seeing things for what they are in an attempt to speak like Raven. This doesn’t go well at all, but once they had their match it would be a classic. Apparently this is under Raven’s Rules, meaning anything goes. Saturn tries to jump Benoit but gets chopped down for his efforts. More chops hit Saturn’s chest in the corner and a jawbreaker gets Benoit out of a sleeper attempt. Benoit stomps away in the corner and invites Raven to get in the ring. Saturn catches Benoit’s arm during a chop attempt and hits a quick suplex to take over.

 

Chris comes right back with a dropkick to the knee but has to knock Raven to the floor instead of go after Saturn. Benoit whips Saturn into the barricade but Raven’s men Kidman and Sick Boy interfere to give Saturn control. Back in and Saturn puts on a chinlock before hitting a moonsault, only to injure himself in the process. A few knees to Benoit’s ribs put him down again but Benoit’s foot is in the ropes. Off to reverse chinlock by Saturn to stay on the ribs but he lets it go for no apparent reason.

 

A kind of brainbuster gets two on Benoit and it’s off to another chinlock. Benoit fights up and hooks a sunset flip for two before clotheslining Saturn down. Both guys are dazed now but it’s Benoit taking over as they get back up. Saturn grabs a quick falcon arrow (sitout slam) to put Benoit down, only to have Chris knock him off the top rope and to the floor.

 

Benoit takes it to the floor and puts on his Crippler Crossface (arm trap hold with a facelock) but the Flock makes the save. Benoit fights them and throws Saturn back in for the flying headbutt, only to have the Flock come in again. They’re quickly dispatched, but Raven himself comes in with the DDT to lay Benoit out. Saturn puts on his Rings of Saturn double armbar but Benoit is out cold, ending the match.

 

Rating: C+. This was getting good at the end but the decision here makes little sense. Benoit had been running through the Flock, so why have him lose to Saturn right before he’s supposed to face Raven? Benoit can’t beat the second in command so we’re supposed to want to see him fight the boss? That doesn’t make sense.

 

By the way: this is an eight match card and the heels are now 4/4.

 

Buff Bagwell vs. Lex Luger

 

Buff is of course Marcus Bagwell and now part of the NWO. This is I think the fourth match between these two in about a month with Bagwell cheating to win before. Bagwell of course stalls before the match begins because that’s what people with little talent do to draw heat. They lock up and go into the corner with no one being able to get an advantage. Buff starts pounding away in the corner but Lex comes back with right hands of his own. A press slam puts Bagwell down and a clothesline puts him on the floor.

 

Bagwell is ticked off and wants Vincent out here to help him. Apparently the power of a worthless man obsessed with his own career like Vincent is enough to inspire Bagwell as he pounds away on Lex. It doesn’t last long though as Luger pounds him down onto the floor and sends him into the barricade before nailing Vincent. The distraction lets Bagwell get in more of his array of right hands and forearms before stomping away in the corner. Bagwell pounds on Luger’s back and says hi to his mom Judy (future World Tag Team Champion. Please, don’t ask).

 

Luger gets in a back elbow but can’t follow up at all. Then again he took some forearms to the back so how good could be be right now? Bagwell puts on a chinlock for a bit before clotheslining Luger down for two. Back to the chinlock as this match is already going long. Luger tries to come back but a knee to the ribs puts him right back down. Now it’s a sleeper because this match hasn’t had enough rest holds. Lex finally fights up and suplexes him down so let’s lay around even more.

 

Luger pounds away and hits some clotheslines and atomic drops. Now Luger has to beat up Vincent before suplexing Bagwell down. Vincent is thrown off the top and clotheslined to the floor and Luger stomps away in the corner. The referee calls him off, allowing Bagwell to hit him in the back and into the referee. Luger puts Buff in the Torture Rack but there’s no referee to see Randy Savage make the save. Savage gets racked but here’s Scott Norton to hit Luger in the head with a chain and put Bagwell on top for the pin.

 

Rating: D. In case you’re keeping track, we’re about an hour and forty minutes into this show and the heels are still undefeated. I’m assuming the idea here was to make Bagwell look like he can beat a big name, but having him need three other guys and a weapon to do so isn’t going to accomplish that goal. This was really boring too and could have had five minutes cut out from it.

 

US Title: Curt Hennig vs. Diamond Dallas Page

 

Hennig is defending and had been feuding with Flair for months, but Flair is hurt so Page is subbing for him. Curt is also NWO of course. Apparently Page stole the physical belt last night on Saturday Night….and then gave it back before the match tonight. That sounds like an idea they had and then dropped. Page has bad ribs which he had for months on end. Hennig gets elbowed in the face a lot and knocked out to the floor for a breather.

 

Back in and Hennig wisely goes after the bad ribs before putting on a chinlock. Thankfully it doesn’t last long as Page counters into the much more interesting headlock. Curt fights up and is put right back into the hold as the match continues to go slowly. Back up and they head to the floor where Hennig snaps Page’s throat across the top rope to take over. Page also goes ribs first into the steps as Hennig is thinking with his attack here. They go back into the ring where Curt pounds on the ribs even more.

 

Page tries to fight back but charges into a boot in the corner and a clothesline takes him down. Off to a chinlock which must be left over from the Bagwell match. The fans start chanting boring as this hold drags on for over a minute. Page finally fights up and hits a jawbreaker to escape before punching Hennig out to the floor. A dive over the top puts Hennig down again and Page throws him into the crowd to continue the beating.

 

They head back inside where Hennig gets to do his reverse crotch against the post spot. The Diamond Cutter is blocked by a grab of the ropes though and Hennig gets two. A rollup gets two for Page but Hennig clotheslines him down for two. Hennig loads up his Hennigplex but Page counters into a Diamond Cutter. He totally botched the move though and it looks like an armbar. They both get back up and Page hits the Diamond Cutter out of nowhere for the US Title and the first win by a good guy of the night.

 

Rating: C-. This wasn’t great and the botched ending hurt it a bit. Still though, it’s nice to see the fans have something to cheer for, even though it took them nearly two hours to get there. To say the Diamond Cutter was a popular move is the understatement of the year, as the fans went nuts when he hit it. This was a pretty dull match until the Cutter hit.

 

Bret Hart comes out to be guest referee. There’s no pyro, there’s no big entrance, there’s nothing but generic music and Bret casually walking to the ring. The theory is that he’s in the NWO but that’s never been confirmed yet.

 

Eric Bischoff vs. Larry Zbyszko

 

This should have been Hall vs. Larry, as those two had been talking trash to each other for months. However, Larry only gets Hall if he beats Eric here tonight. If Eric wins, the NWO controls Nitro. Larry is in good shape here considering he’s 46 and hasn’t wrestled regularly in about five years. Bret checks them for weapons and we’re ready to go. Bischoff has the body of a 15 year old girl. He is however a black belt in karate so you can expect a lot of striking.

 

Bischoff hits a quick shot to Larry’s head and immediately celebrates. More strikes follow and Eric heads out to the floor for consultation with Hall. Back in and Larry hits some shots of his own and Eric is scared. Larry goes after him again and Eric hits a spin kick to the side of the head that knocks Larry down. That’s enough for Zbyszko and he charges at Eric and takes him down to the mat. Bret admonishes him for pulling Eric’s hair, so Larry puts on a sleeper and a headscissors, both of which are broken up for being chokes.

 

Off to a standing figure four but Eric quickly makes a rope. The damage is done though and Larry goes after the leg. Makes sense against a karate guy. Bret keeps Larry away from Eric and the announcers PANIC. Imagine that: a referee following the rules. Eric is sent into the steps and takes a brief walk around the ring. Back in and Bret blocks a right hand from Larry, allowing Eric to get in a kick to the head. Bischoff fires more kicks with Larry on the ropes, although Bret is fine with them.

 

Eric is starting to kick himself out though as the kicks are getting weaker and weaker each time. Now he fires rights and lefts in the corner as Larry is just covering up. Eric can barely move now and Larry shakes everything off. A suplex puts Bischoff down and Larry ties him in the Tree of Woe. Hall pulls something out of his pocket and loads it into Eric’s shoe, WITH BRET LOOKING RIGHT AT THEM. I mean, he knows what’s going on so why not LOOK THE OTHER WAY???

 

Anyway, Eric kicks him in the head with the loaded foot and the piece of metal goes flying. Bret isn’t supposed to see it, despite watching it fly through the air. Eric celebrates, so Bret hits both Bischoff and Hall before putting Hall in the Sharpshooter, which is Bret’s version of the Scorpion Deathlock. Larry chokes Eric for a bit and is declared the winner, presumably by DQ.

 

Rating: F. This was in the second to last spot on the biggest show of the year and featured the boss of the company who has no skill whatsoever in the ring. Larry did fine all things considered, but to waste this spot on this match and to waste BRET HART’s in ring debut on this match is absolutely ridiculous in every sense of the word.

 

And yet, it’s only going to get worse.

 

Before we get to the main event, I need to set the stage a bit more. This match is 18 months in the making at minimum. Hogan has been the biggest villain in the company the entire time and has been behind a ton of attacks, crooked endings, and every other possible evil thing you can do as a wrestler. He has basically held the world title hostage for the entire time and has gone completely against WCW. Tonight should be his punishment for those crimes. This match should be Hogan being taken to the gallows and executed for everything he’s done for the last year and a half.

 

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Hollywood Hogan

 

So how does Hogan come out after running scared of Sting for a year and a half? He struts to the ring, playing the belt like a guitar. He looks like he’s about to face Sick Boy instead of Sting for the world title. Hogan should have had people literally dragging him to the ring as he was trying everything he could to get out of the match. Have him offering money to the security, have him trying to run, have him doing ANYTHING but walking out with that big grin on his face.

 

After a year of repelling from the rafters, coming through the crowd, and at one point ziplining to the ring Sting…..calmly walks out. Oh wait there’s some lightning and a voiceover that we’ve heard before so it’s cool right? They stare each other down and as the bell rings, Hogan shoves him away. Sting slaps him so Hogan walks around the ring and is loudly booed as you would expect. Sting is pushed to the corner but comes out with a right hand and it’s pretty much all downhill from there.

 

We’re about two minutes into the match now and that’s literally all that’s happened. Hogan kicks him in the ribs and a single right hand sends Sting flying across the ring. Sting is pounded in the corner as Hogan gives a shout out to his son, Nasty Nick. A shot to the throat has Sting in trouble as the crowd is stunned. There’s a slam but Hogan misses three straight elbows. A dropkick puts Hogan on the floor and Sting just stands there looking down at Hollywood.

 

Back in and the fans are chanting boring. Hogan grabs a headlock before running Sting over like he’s not even there. Two more dropkicks send Hogan to the floor and again just stands there. Back inside again and Sting puts on a headlock to take Hogan down. We’re six minutes into this and the entire sequence of action has been punches, headlocks, a shoulder block and dropkicks. Goldberg and McMichael went less than six minutes and had a full match while Hogan and Sting have fit about a minute’s worth of action in the same amount of time.

 

Hogan shoves him off and lays Sting out with a clothesline. As in Sting is down on the mat for about 10 seconds off a clothesline. A suplex puts Sting down but he’s on his feet before Hogan is. That’s more like it. He does the crotch chop sign to Hogan and pounds Hogan into the corner….so Hogan calmly rakes the eyes to take over again. Hogan is toying with Sting so far and he does even more toying by throwing Sting to the floor. Sting is thrown into the timekeeper’s area and Hogan hits him in the neck with Sting’s trademark baseball bat.

 

Sting is choked with a t-shirt up against the railing, but he comes back by whipping Hogan into the barricade. As usual though, Sting misses the Stinger Splash into the steel and Hogan takes over seconds later. Sting is crotched on the barricade and dropped with a single right hand. I’ve seen Hogan have more trouble dropping jobbers. Back in and Hogan hits an atomic drop before choking away. We’re over ten minutes into this now and Hogan hasn’t been in significant trouble at all.

 

And now, it’s going to get even worse.

 

Hogan hits the big boot and the legdrop for the pin in a little over eleven minutes. Now, the announcers start talking about a fast count, but the count was about as fast as you would expect it to be, albeit maybe a hair faster. It’s far from what you would call a fast count when you’re talking about a crooked referee though. I’ve heard stories over the years about Hogan actually paying the referee to count at a normal speed to count properly instead of doing it fast, and if that’s the case then he did a decent job at it. The count was close enough that you could buy it either way, but it looked good enough.

 

On top of that, the far bigger problem with the fast count theory is that it doesn’t hold up when you look at the aftermath. The idea behind a fast count is that the guy would have been able to kick out had it been at normal speed. Sting NEVER MOVED. He doesn’t push off, he doesn’t sit up after the count, he doesn’t kick his legs. Sting is still laying on the mat a good ten seconds after the three count. Even with the fast count, Sting looks like he’s out cold so the count doesn’t even make a difference.

 

On top of THAT, Bret Hart is seen walking in front of the camera as Hogan is going down for the cover. Not a few seconds after the cover, not as Hogan is celebrating, but as Hogan is getting on top of Sting. That would mean that he came into the arena probably before Hogan even hit the big boot. Why was he out there? He’s there early enough to grab the timekeeper’s hand before he can strike the bell, which makes even less sense.

 

Back to the “action” as Bret grabs the mic and mumbles that “he’s not going to let it happen again.” He complains about the count being fast and decks Nick Patrick (who has the most amazing overblown fall ever, throwing his arms in the air and falling over like a tree). Hogan tries to leave (as Sting is just now getting up) but Bret throws him back in the ring.

 

Bret calls for the bell, Sting goes NUTS and hits a quick Stinger Splash. He tries for another but Hogan holds the ropes, pretty much stopping Sting’s momentum cold. The NWO runs in but Sting fights them off and hits another splash on Hogan. The Scorpion Deathlock goes on and Hogan gives up, allowing Bret to call for the bell and give Sting the title.

 

WCW comes out to celebrate, Sting shouts something in what sounds like Spanish (the last word was mamacita. A quick Google search says Sting said something like “revenge is sweet baby”) into the camera, end of show.

 

Rating: W. As in where in the world do I even start. First and foremost, the match absolutely sucked in case you couldn’t tell. Hogan was destroying Sting for over ten minutes and then pinned him clean(ish) in the middle of the ring. It’s completely against everything that the match was supposed to be and was horribly boring on top of that. This made Sting look like a complete joke and did little for anyone else besides Hogan.

 

Now for the second ending, which has even more holes in it. First and foremost, there’s one huge problem with what Bret did: what if you didn’t watch WWF? Simple question: what if you had no idea that this was a reference to what happened at Survivor Series a few weeks ago because you don’t watch that company’s programming? What was Bret not allowing to happen again? Granted you can only be confused by that if you understood what Bret said, which was mumbled pretty badly.

 

Second, Bret was hired as guest referee for one match, but he now has the authority to referee any match he wants all night long. The fans live weren’t told that, so they either had to put it together in about a minute and a half, or they were completely oblivious to what was going on. The whole idea was a stretch to put it mildly and it was made even worse by how badly it was executed.

 

Finally…..just why? I mean, aside from Hogan, who could have possibly thought this was a good idea? The answer I’ve heard from either Hogan or Bischoff in one of their books is that Sting had some substance abuse issues and was in no condition to be champion at this point. The problem with that theory is that Sting just wrestled a coherent enough match. He was pretty much a shell of his former self, but he was able to throw dropkicks, punches, the Stinger Splash and the Scorpion Deathlock. That’s really all he needed in this match, but apparently he wasn’t capable of doing those things, at least according to Hogan or Bischoff.

 

All in all, this match is the biggest disaster that I can ever remember for a major match. It was booked completely backwards, it did nothing that it was supposed to do, the ending was screwed up, and the fans were likely confused by at least one thing at the time. Sting may indeed have had a drug problem at the time, but if he’s even remotely capable of wrestling a passable match (which he clearly was), you give the fans this moment and worry about the rest later. It’s been over 15 years since this happened and I’m still amazed by how badly they screwed this up.

 

Overall Rating: F. That’s the only way to describe this show: a failure. WCW completely failed at what they were trying to do here and the show is a disaster. The best match is just slightly above average and that’s likely being generous. No good guy wins until nearly two hours into the show and the main reason to watch the show (which A LOT of people did) was completely fouled up.

 

This is everything that you can possibly do wrong on a major show rolled into one and multiplied several times over. There’s nothing truly good here and the aftershocks of this show crippled WCW for good. This was supposed to be the night that WCW was supposed to come back from everything that had gone wrong for them and take back their company. At the end of the day, they got back the US Title and that’s it. They already had Nitro and yeah they got back the world title. For now. That’s the other reason this show is so awful: at the end of the day, none of this mattered.

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