Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania X: One Of The Great Ones

Wrestlemania X
Date: March 20, 1994
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,065
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

Anyone that has read my stuff over the years knows that I believe Wrestlemania X7 to be the undisputed best show ever. This is one of the small handful of shows that I actually think about for awhile before saying X7 is better. On this show are two of the best matches of all time and two world title matches, all without Hogan. This show feels like a major show and it more than lives up to the hype. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from the first Wrestlemania. That still holds up to this day.

Little Richard and a choir sing America the Beautiful. The first version is just Richard but the choir kicks in on the second one, making for an awesome performance.

We recap Bret vs. Owen. Expect to hear the words “we recap” a lot tonight, because there is A LOT of backstory to this show. Back in mid to late 1993, Owen was getting annoyed at Bret getting all of the spotlight, but he went along with Bret and two more brothers on a Survivor Series team against Shawn Michaels and the Knights. The Knights were easily dispatched, but late in the match Owen was knocked into Bret, sending the elder brother (Bret) into the barricade. As his family went to check on him, Owen was rolled up and pinned, making him the only Hart to be eliminated.

This sent Owen into a tirade about how Bret was always hogging the spotlight. Owen challenged Bret to a match but Bret said no way. Instead, Bret offered to team up with Owen to win the tag titles, which was enough to appease Owen. At the Royal Rumble during the title shot, Bret injured his knee and refused to tag late in the match, causing the referee to stop the match due to the injury. Owen finally snapped and kicked Bret’s bad leg out from under him, fully turning heel in an awesome and totally justified moment.

Later in the night, Bret was in the Royal Rumble. He and Lex Luger were the last two men in the match and they both went out at the same time. No one could tell who hit the ground first, so they were declared co-winners. Therefore, both guys get title matches tonight. A coin toss was determined who would get the first shot at champion Yokozuna, which was won by Lex. Therefore, Lex gets a title shot first tonight, but Bret has to face suitable competition so he doesn’t get an unfair advantage in the later match. His opponent is his brother Owen (Luger would have faced Crush is Bret had won the toss). Got all that?

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

For reasons I’m not clear on, the Fink isn’t the announcer tonight. They lock up to start and Owen shoves Bret away, earning himself some celebrating. Bret takes him down to the mat but Owen escapes and celebrates again. Back to the mat for some amateur stuff but Owen grabs the rope. Owen tries to take it to the mat but Bret easily counters to send him out to the floor. Back in and Owen slaps him in the face to fire up his older brother.

More amateur stuff ensues and Owen gets to do his spinning counter to a wristlock, only to pull Bret down by the hair. Bret channels his inner Shawn and nips up before getting two off a rollup. Bret takes over with an armbar and a clothesline to send Owen out to the floor. Back in again and Bret slaps the blonde Hart before rolling him up for two. Bret hooks the armbar again before getting two off a crucifix. We’re about five minutes into this now and there is absolutely nothing to complain about. They get up again and Owen hits a sweet spinwheel kick to take over before stomping Bret to the floor.

Owen rams Bret back first into the post as the anger is starting to seep out. A backbreaker sets up a camel clutch back inside as Lawler is loving this. Owen yells at his brother in a great touch to the evilness. Bret breaks it pretty quickly but walks into a belly to belly suplex for two. A cross body by Owen is rolled through by Bret for two but Owen goes straight to the back again. Owen hits a German suplex for two and drops a leg on the back of Bret’s head for two more.

Bret tries to spin out of a suplex but gets caught in a tombstone. Owen goes up top but misses a swan dive, giving Bret the breather that he’s been needing. Bret starts firing back and gets two each off a clothesline and a Russian legsweep. There’s the backbreaker followed by the middle rope elbow for two more. It’s Sharpshooter time but Owen pops up and hits the enziguri to put Bret down.

Another Sharpshooter attempt is countered by Owen and a rollup gets two on Bret. This is very fast paced stuff. Owen heads to the floor and we get LUCHA BRET as he takes out his brother. He hurts his knee in the process though and Owen is very happy. Back inside and Owen goes for the leg, wrapping it around the post a few times because that’s what villains do. Off to an inverted Indian Deathlock by Owen but he lets it go before too long.

There’s a yet to be named dragon screw leg whip followed by a Figure Four (wrong leg of course) as Bret is in big trouble. Bret reverses and rolls into the ropes to break the hold but his knee is gone. An enziguri finally puts Owen down and buys big brother a breather. A headbutt puts Owen down again and there’s the chest first into the buckle bump for Owen. A bulldog gets two on Owen as does a sweet piledriver.

There’s a superplex for a delayed two as Jerry Lawler is freaking out. A sleeper is quickly broken up by a hidden low blow from Owen and it’s time for the Sharpshooter on Bret. The older Hart slaps the mat but it doesn’t mean anything yet. Bret reverses into a Sharpshooter of his own but Owen is right in front of the ropes. Owen charges into a boot in the corner so Bret loads up a rollup, but Owen counters into a cradle for the 100% clean pin.

Rating: A+. If there’s a better opening match anywhere, I’d love to see it. This was Owen’s coming out party and he looked excellent in doing it. Bret has no shame in losing here as he didn’t so much get beat as much as he got caught. This set up a great feud over the summer for the title between these two, but it never reached this level again. There was some DEEP psychology going on out there with Bret being hesitant to fight his brother and Owen using the advantage to catch Bret in a wrestling move, all on top of the leg injury. Excellent match and one of the best ever.

Owen says he told us all he could do it and he’s absolutely right.

We look at the Wrestlemania II battle royal.

Sy Sperling of the Hair Club for Men debuts a hairpiece for Fink. I’m thinking no on this one Howard.

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Bigelow runs over Doink to start with a clothesline and a dropkick to silence the crowd. A headbutt misses though and the Clown pounds away a bit. Bigelow misses an elbow drop and it’s off to Dink, meaning Luna has to come in as well. This is your usual “comedy” but Luna does hit a running hip attack in 619 position but Dink starts running around in circles. The small clown goes up top but misses a dive.

Vachon goes up but misses a BIG splash, allowing the big boys to come back in. Doink pounds away but is clotheslined to the floor with one shot. Dink annoys both heels but Doink comes back in, only to be sat on in a sunset flip attempt. A charges misses the big clown though and a jumping DDT puts Bigelow down. The Whoopee Cushion (top rope seated senton) completely misses and Dink is knocked to the floor. Doink tries a suplex but Bigelow falls on him for two. The top rope headbutt is enough to finish off the clowns.

Rating: D. This was bad but not completely terrible. Doink wasn’t doing his stupid comedy and thankfully Bigelow didn’t have to look all that stupid, which is the worst thing they could have done. The match wasn’t much but to be fair they needed something to give the crowd a breather after the awesome opener. This wasn’t horrible.

Bigelow tries to crush Dink but Doink makes the save.

A Bill Clinton impersonator is here. Somehow I.R.S. gets a spot in the presidential box.

Wrestlemania III was awesome!

Randy Savage vs. Crush

This is the result of a big heel turn by Crush where he cost Savage his broadcasting job. The idea was Yokozuna injured Crush but Savage didn’t come visit him, so Crush turned on him. This is a twist on the falls count anywhere match, but the deal is you have to pin someone out of the ring and the pinned guy has 60 seconds to make it back to the ring, making it more like a last man standing match actually. It’s also no holds barred.

Savage charges at Crush in the aisle but gets dropped on the barricade for a pin in about 40 seconds. Of course Savage makes it back in (despite some Fuji interference) but that’s a nice quick introduction to the concept. Savage is put in the Tree of Woe where Crush stomps away. Fuji hands Crush some salt but Randy knocks it into the evil one’s face. A top rope double ax has Crush in trouble and there’s the big elbow, but Savage has to send Crush to the floor before pinning him. Smart indeed. Crush beats the count after Fuji pours some water on his face.

Crush comes back with a kind of hot shot to send Savage to the floor, but Randy immediately comes back by sending Crush into the post. They fight into the crowd where Crush superkicks Savage’s head off. A piledriver doesn’t work on Savage so they fight into the back. Savage rams Crush into various metal objects and gets a pin, but instead of leaving he ties Crush’s feet up with a rope and hangs him upside down. It doesn’t quite work as Crush falls just after Savage leaves, but the clock was running the whole time and Savage wins.

Rating: C. Keeping in mind that this was 1994, this was pretty good. Sixty seconds was too long of an interval as it was too long before the guy was in danger. If they cut it doewn to about thirty, this would have been much better. Either way, not bad here and more proof that Savage was still a very valuable asset to Vince, but for whatever reason (not Stephanie), he was let go.

Fake Clinton says he’s a fan. I.R.S. congratulates him on raising taxes.

We see videos from Fan Fest, which was the forerunner to Axxess.

Savage celebrates with the fans. He also won a tournament for the world title at Wrestlemania IV.

Women’s Title: Lelani Kai vs. Alundra Blayze

Kai was at the first Wrestlemania if that tells you anything. Blayze is the new champion after the belt was resurrected for no apparent reason. Kai, a Hawaiian/something else hybrid, runs Blayze over but gets caught in a sunset flip a few seconds later for two. Lelani comes back with a chokebomb for no cover but a bad splash gets two.

The champ comes back with a hurricanrana before there was a name for such a thing in America. Either way it gets two and we head to the floor. That goes nowhere so Kai hits a butterfly suplex for two. Blayze comes back with some basic strikes and some hair drags for two each. Alundra hits her bridging German suplex to retain a few seconds later.

Rating: D. Was there a point to this? I didn’t think so either so let’s see what was stupid about it. First of all, the “division” had two regulars in it: Blayze and a Japanese monster named Bull Nakano. Based on that, it’s pretty clear why the division was done in just a few months, not to be mentioned again for about four years.

Roddy Piper sprayed a non-celebrity with a fire extinguisher at Mania V.

Tag Titles: Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

The Quebecers are defending and have Johnny Polo with them. About a year later, Polo would become Raven. The Men on a Mission are Mabel (Viscera) and perhaps the most worthless wrestler that I can think of at the moment, Mo. They were purple and gold and rap with their manager Oscar. That’s about it. Before the match, here’s some big chested blonde talk show host for Shawn to hit on. Burt Reynolds, pretty clearly bombed, shows up to steal her. From what I’ve heard, Reynolds was the biggest jerk on the planet backstage at this show.

The Quebecers are the Mountie and another Canadian who dress like Mounties. True story: the Royal Canadian Mounted Police yelled at the WWF and said they had to have their song (it might have been just the Mountie actually. Not that it matters) changed to say “We’re NOT the Mounties” because the RCMP was worried about people believing they were real corrupt Mounties. Wait why am I spending this much space on this match?

Anyway the champions jump the Men before the bell but 500lb+ Mabel runs them oveand brings in Mo. Since Mo is the most worthless wrestler I can think of at this moment, he’s easily beaten down and not many people care. Mo is sent to the floor and Pierre backdrops Jacques over the top and onto the worthless one. Back in and a double hot shot gets two on Mo. This is going nowhere.

Mo comes back with a forward roll attack but the tag isn’t seen. Wait yes it is and Mabel cleans house. The champions try a double suplex on the fat man but hurt their backs in the process. They try it again and actually get it to work as Polo celebrates. Pierre hits the Cannonball (assisted Swanton Bomb) for two and Mabel starts firing back. The Men hit their double splash but there’s no referee. END THIS NONSENSE ALREADY! Mabel splashes Pierre on the floor….and it’s a countout.

Rating: F+. There was no structure, there was no flow, Mo is worthless, Mabel is fat and worthless, the ending sucked, and there was entirely too little Johnny Polo. Was there ANYTHING good about this match? Oh wait the suplex was good. To give you an idea of how bad Men on a Mission were, they accidentally won the titles at a house show around this time as Mabel was too fat to get up on a cover and Jacques couldn’t kick out.

Wrestlemania VI had the Ultimate Challenge.

We do the “celebrities” for the first title match. Basically it’s the aforementioned talk show host and a member of New Kids on the Block. Seriously, that’s it. There’s a guest referee though: Mr. Perfect. Now remember last year when Luger knocked out Mr. Perfect? Well there was never any retribution for that…..but I’m sure it won’t mean anything here right?

WWF World Title: Lex Luger vs. Yokozuna

Yoko is defending of course and there’s also backstory to this. The idea here is that last 4th of July, Yokozuna held a bodyslam challenge on board the U.S.S. Intrepid. No one could slam him and the contest was closed, but a helicopter landed on the ship and out stepped Lex Luger. He hit a running forearm and slammed Yokozuna to get the biggest face turn in years. He then went around the country on a bus, begging for a title shot because he was MADE IN THE USA.

Anyway, he got the shot at Summerslam with the catch that it was his ONLY shot. Luger did indeed beat Yoko….by countout. Therefore he was frozen out of the title picture, unless he could win the Royal Rumble. We’ve already covered that though so here’s the first title match. Luger gets a bit intro with fireworks, but do you really think New York City is going to cheer him? Especially with BRET HART in the wings? You should know better than that.

Luger pounds away like any AMERICAN hero worth his (certainly not Japanese) salt. A big right hand sends Yoko out to the floor and there’s an ax handle to the back of the head. Luger busts out a freaking TOP ROPE CROSS BODY for two and a jumping elbow for the same. Since it’s early in the match, a slam completely fails and Yoko falls on top for two. Yoko rips a buckle pad off but we hit the nerve hold for a bit instead. Luger fights out of it but Yoko rams into him to stop any comeback.

Back to el nerve hold which has been running for about five minutes total now. Luger fights up but Fuji pulls the rope down to send him to the outside. Back in and BACK TO THE NERVE HOLD. After about 87 years Luger fights up and makes his comeback….only to be knocked down by a chop. Yoko tries to send Luger into Chekov’s buckle but gets sent into it himself of course.

Luger makes his REAL comeback and hits a clothesline to put Yoko down and there’s the “slam” (more like he picked up Yoko and dropped him). The forearm knocks Yoko out but Luger has to beat up Fuji and Cornette. Perfect won’t count so Luger shoves him…AND THAT’S A DQ! Holy screwjob! That’s clearly what the fans are chanting: screwjob, not some other word that starts with s and often comes after holy.

Rating: D+. It’s rare to see Luger as the star of a match but that’s certainly the case here. That nerve hold was RIDICULOUS as it was about 80% of the champion’s “offense”, although a case can be made that he was saving strength for later tonight which is understandable. This was a callback to something that most people didn’t remember, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t fair game. Unfortunately Perfect would injure his back again after this and not be able to payoff this feud. Either way, Luger is officially a choker in the WWF and was done as a world title contender after this.

Luger and Perfect yell at each in the back.

At Wrestlemania VII, Savage and Liz reunited. The moment given here is the Blindfold match but screw that.

Here’s Harvey Wippleman to yell at Fink for having a stupid hairpiece. They get in a shoving match but Adam Bomb comes out to scare Fink. This brings out….EARTHQUAKE?

Adam Bomb vs. Earthquake

This is barely a match as Quake hits his powerslam and the Earthquake gets the pin in less than 40 seconds. This is what you call “being way over time and needing to hurry up.” I’m shocked Earthquake had a job at this point.

Cornette goes on a rant against Lex Luger and cats while also calling Todd Pettingill “Petting Zoo” before yelling about Bret Hart. Then he talks about fish and Bret starting a feeding frenzy of sharks. I could listen to Cornette ramble while still staying on point for HOURS.

The Wrestlemania VIII moment is the Undertaker. Seriously, that’s it. No mention of his match, whether he won or lost, his opponent, or anything shown other than a closeup of him walking to the ring. Just the Undertaker.

Ready for some more backstory? Back in 1993, Shawn Michaels was Intercontinental Champion but failed a drug test. To this day Shawn says he didn’t do it but that’s beside the point. We needed a new champion so Ramon won a battle royal and then a match to win the title. Shawn came back with the original belt and said he never lost, so he was still the champion. The solution? Put both belts on a ladder and let them climb up to pull them down in a classic match that might be the match of the decade.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

Shawn has Diesel with him here. Diesel is told to leave but just doesn’t because that’s the kind of guy he is. Basic stuff to start with Shawn blocking a hip toss but getting chokeslammed instead. They hit the ropes to build some speed and Shawn hits a neckbreaker. Razor gets sent to the floor and there’s a clothesline from Diesel, earning him another ejection which actually works this time.

Anyway Shawn gets punched in the jaw and Razor takes over again. Shawn is knocked into the corner before a BIG clothesline puts him on the floor. Razor exposes the concrete but we head back inside before he can use it. The Razor’s Edge is loaded up but Shawn backdrops Ramon over the top and onto the concrete, possibly injuring an elbow. Shawn gets the ladder but Razor jacks his jaw to stop it. The ladder is slid inside but Shawn hits a baseball slide to knock it into Ramon’s ribs.

Back inside again and the ladder is rammed into Razor’s ribs both in the corner and on the mat. Shawn throws the ladder onto Razor’s back which looks SICK. He tosses it at Razor against the ropes and goes for a climb, only to have Razor pull Shawn’s tights down and give us a rather unpleasant (or pleasant depending on your preferences) view. Not that it matters as Shawn knocks him down and climbs again, this time hitting a pretty famous splash to crush Razor again.

Razor saves another climb by shoving the ladder over, sending Shawn onto the top rope. We get a camera shot from above the ring, showing both guys laid out on the mat. Cool shot. Back up and Michaels is whipped into the ladder in the corner, knocking him out to the floor. Razor rams the ladder into Shawn’s chest with his back against the post. If that’s not enough, Razor launches Shawn into the ladder against the apron to keep Michaels in agony.

Back in and Ramon BLASTS Shawn with the ladder to knock him to the outside again. Razor climbs up but Shawn dives off the top rope to knock him down. The ladder falls onto Shawn in the process to keep both guys on the mat. They both start to climb but the ladder is bent. Shawn is higher up but can’t hang in a slugout with Razor. Michaels gets punched down but the ladder gives way under Razor, sending him down.

Ramon climbs again but Shawn dropkicks the ladder which doesn’t topple over this time. In a smart move, Shawn pushes the ladder over onto Razor’s back to take control again. A big piledriver puts Razor down so Shawn goes to the corner. In another famous visual, Shawn rides the ladder down onto Razor, crushing him yet again. Since he’s a jerk though, Shawn puts the ladder over top of Razor, but Ramon gets up and knocks Shawn off the ladder. Michaels gets tangled in the ropes, allowing Razor to climb up to unify the titles.

Rating: A+. This is one of the matches that reignited the midcard scene after things had died down for a bit. It also paved the way for the insane style that would start to dominate about five years later. That being said, it’s still a freaking AWESOME match with some iconic spots such as the splash. It also started Shawn on the roll of a lifetime, as the next year he would be in the world title match at Wrestlemania then win the title the following year. This match is required viewing for fans.

I.R.S. and company argue in the back, so let’s just cancel a ten man tag. In other words, we’re running long and don’t have time. It happened on Raw the next night and no one remembers it.

Ted DiBiase tries to bribe Mr. President.

Wrestlemania IX’s moment is Fuji throwing salt in Bret’s eyes. We don’t see the pin for some reason though.

Videos on Bret and Yoko set up the main event.

Burt Reynolds is guest ring announcer and my goodness he makes Scott Hall look like a poster boy for AA. Oh and Jennie Garth from Beverly Hills 90210 is timekeeper. The guest referee: Roddy Piper (pause for the huge ovation) who may or may not hate Bret because of what happened at Mania 8. Nice touch.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Yoko is defending if you can’t tell. Burt is barely able to read lines off a card. Hart is STILL selling the leg from earlier, because that’s how awesome he is. Yoko jumps Bret to start and the fans are already fired up for this. Bret tries to fire back with some punches but Yoko stomps him down. Piper and Cornette get in an argument as Yoko blasts Hart. The splash misses though and Bret pounds away, only to hurt his head on a headbutt.

Hart actually manages to punch Yoko down and gets two off an ax handle to the back. The champion comes back with fat man offense and drops the big leg for two. A headbutt puts Bret on the floor but he gets back in at eight. Yoko misses a charge in the corner and there’s a bulldog out of the corner to put the big man down. That only gets two though, as does the middle rope elbow. Bret keeps limping and hits the Hart Attack clothesline for a delayed two.

The belly to belly puts Bret down but Yoko won’t cover for no apparent reason. Instead he loads up the Banzai Drop, only to fall victim to the powers of gravity. It knocks the wind out of the monster, allowing Hart to hook the leg for the pin and the title as the roof is blown off of Madison Square Garden for about the fifth time tonight.

Rating: B-. While it isn’t a classic, the fans were WAY into this and it’s a feel good moment to end the show. Bret was fighting a very different kind of match here rather than he did the previous year, as here he was taking it straight to Yoko instead of sticking and moving. Very solid match here all things considered and a great way to get the giant out of the title scene.

The locker room empties out to celebrate with Bret but Owen stands in the aisle and stares down his brother to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is one of those shows where the bad stuff is bad, but on the other hand the good stuff is absolutely outstanding. With two of the best matches of all time on one show it’s easily one of if not the strongest Wrestlemanias from an in ring perspective. On top of that, the show had long lasting impact as the company focus shifted to the smaller sized guys and longer matches. This was an excellent show but some of the bad stuff can be fast forwarded.

Ratings Comparison

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Original: F

Redo: D

Randy Savage vs. Crush

Original: C+

Redo: C

Alundra Blayze vs. Lelani Kai

Original: D-

Redo: D

Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

Original: F

Redo: F+

Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger

Original: F

Redo: D+

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A-

I was a bit too nice to the middle part of the show last time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/17/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-10-maybe-the-best-mania-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania IX: The Low Point

Wrestlemania IX
Date: April 4, 1993
Location: Caesar’s Palace, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 16,981
Commentators: Jim Ross, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

We’re into the Monday Night Raw era as things are definitely shifting to a new generation. The main event tonight is Bret Hart defending the title against the new monster known as Yokozuna. Other than that we’ve got Beefcake/Hogan challenging Money Inc. for the tag titles in a match that sounds odd when I type it for some reason. Let’s get to it.

Gorilla Monsoon is host this year, which means we need a new commentator. We’ll get to that in a bit, but first of all let’s acknowledge the theme of the show: the World’s Largest Toga Party. Yeah that’s not going to get stupid at all.

Jim Ross debuts on WWF TV for the first time ever in a surprise jump from the other company. Granted it was about a year or so since JR was last seen but it was still surprising.

Cesar and Cleopatra are introduced to the crowd.

Randy Savage comes out on a sedan with the vestal virgins. Bobby Heenan is brought out riding a camel backwards, which he claims was supposed to be the sedan. Funny bit here.

Intercontinental Title: Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is defending of course and has the debuting Luna Vachon behind him. Tatanka is still undefeated here and would be so until much later in the year. Shawn’s former manager, Sensational Sherri, comes down the aisle to stare at Shawn and presumably be in Tatanka’s corner. Tatanka takes Shawn down a few times to start and they fight over arm control. Shawn comes back with a headlock and climbs the ropes to roll Tatanka down with it for two.

The champion tries it again but gets caught in a belly to back suplex for two this time instead. Shawn goes up again but dives into an armdrag as things pick up a bit. There’s a Flair Flip in the corner and a big chop puts Shawn on the floor. Sherri and Luna get in a staredown and Luna licks the ring post. More chops keep Michaels on the floor as the fans are getting into this.

Back in again and Shawn comes off the top with a semi-botched sunset flip for two but Tatanka comes right back with an atomic drop. A DDT puts Shawn down again and Tatanka works on Shawn’s apparently bad shoulder. Shawn tries a clothesline like an idiot and hurts his own arm again. We hit another armbar but Michaels fights up, only to charge shoulder first into the post.

Back to the armbar followed by a shoulder breaker for no cover by the challenger. A top rope chop to the shoulder has Shawn in even more trouble but a second attempt jumps into the superkick. Since it’s 1993 though that doesn’t end anything so Shawn sends Tatanka out to the floor. The girls get in another staredown but Shawn hits a running clothesline off the apron to take Tatanka out again.

Instead of following up, Shawn yells at Sherri. Since he’s Shawn Michaels though, he still maintains control with a neckbreaker for two. A standing dropkick gets two for Shawn and it’s off to a chinlock. That goes nowhere so Shawn hits a modified victory roll out of the corner for two. The shoulder seems to be fine now. Tatanka counters another victory roll attempt into an electric chair to put both guys down. A very delayed cover gets two for the challenger and it’s time to go on the warpath.

Shawn gets caught in a cross body for two and a slingshot sends him face first into the post for two. The crowd is WAY into this match now. Tatanka’s Papoose To Go (Samoan Drop) is countered into a rollup for two for Shawn but he walks into a powerslam for two. Shawn sends him out to the floor and the fans chant for Sherri. Michaels dives off the apron but slams his head into the steps, knocking himself silly and causing a countout win for the racial stereotype.

Rating: B. If Tatanks wins clean here, it’s a near classic. This was a VERY solid opener with the fans getting completely into the near falls. The shoulder injury being forgotten ten minutes into it hurt things though as I can’t stand a plot point being introduced and then left completely alone. Also Tatanka should have won but it still makes for a fine opener.

Luna lays out Sherri while Tatanka celebrates not winning the title.

The Steiners are ready for the Headshrinkers.

Steiner Brothers vs. Headshrinkers

This should be solid stuff. The Shrinkers are Samu and Fatu (Rikishi) here. Historic moment: JR calls this match a slobberknocker, unleashing the term on the wrestling world. The Headshrinkers have Afa as their manager, which will be mentioned later. Scott and Fatu start things off and after being shoved by the Samoan, Scott easily takes him down by the legs. A big old Steiner Line flips Fatu inside out but the Headshrinkers take Scott into the corner to work him over.

The Steiners are sent to the floor so they both climb to the top and hit a double Steiner Line to take both Samoans out to the floor. We settle down to Scott vs. Fatu again but it’s quickly off to Rick. Apparently Luna has attacked Sherri at the first aid station. Samu pounds on Rick in the corner and hits a running clothesline, only to be taken down by a running forearm/clothesline. Samu goes face first into the post to absolutely no effect, because he’s Samoan you see.

Back to Scott but Afa gets on the apron for a distraction. Scott charges into a hot shot to send him out to the floor in a NASTY looking bump. Afa cracks his staff over Scott’s back which looked great and sounded even greater. Things settle down a bit and Fatu hits a backbreaker and middle rope headbutt for two on Scott. A spinning kick to the face takes Scott down again but Samu charges into a boot in the corner.

Fatu blocks the hot tag by knocking Scott to the floor where he gets sent face first into the post. In a sweet sequence, Scott tries to ram Fatu’s head into the mat but Fatu pops up and superkicks Scott right back down. A modified Demolition Decapitatior gets two on Scott and let’s hit that nerve hold. Scott fights up and they collide as is common in tag matches. Heenan keeps ripping on JR and Oklahoma as Ross has almost no idea what to make of this kind of sarcasm. That says a lot when he used to work with Jim Cornette.

Back to Samu who goes up top, only to miss a top rope splash. The hot tag brings in Rick but a double headbutt immediately puts him back down. Here’s your awesome spot of the match: Rick gets loaded up in a Doomsday Device position but when Samu dives at him with a cross body, Rick catches him in mid air and powerslams/belly to belly suplexes him off Fatu’s shoulders and down. AWESOME looking move and they hit it perfectly. Scott hits a belly to belly on Fatu but Samu hits a superkick to take him right back down. Out of NOWHERE Scott hits the Frankensteiner for the pin. Nice bump from a guy that big.

Rating: B. I liked this one as much as I liked the opener which is saying a lot. This probably should have kicked the show off as the spots were hitting better and the fans were popping a lot louder, but I can get why they went with a title match. I’m a Headshrinkers fan so seeing them hold their own against one of the best teams ever is a very fun sight. Good match here and that powerslam was great.

Strap yourselves in now people, because it’s ALL downhill from here.

We cut to the back where Doink has desecrated a statue of Julius Caesar. This is when Doink is still the evil clown which had a ton of potential, but they of course had to make him kid friendly because that’s how wrestling works. The idea here is that Doink has been using evil pranks on Crush, including beating him with a prosthetic arm.

Crush vs. Doink the Clown

This is during Crush-A-Mania when he was on the verge of getting the mega push to the stars which would never happen. Crush chases him around the ring to start and slams Doink on the floor before pounding Doink in the face a bit. Doink tries to punch back but Crush no sells everything. Back inside and Crush hits a neckbreaker for no cover. A neck snap over the top keeps Doink down as does a backbreaker. We’re three minutes in and it’s all Crush so far.

As Crush is hitting some Sheamus forearms on the apron, Doink hits a kind of Stunner on the top rope to take over. A few top rope forearms to the back of Crush’s head keeps us in clown control and a lame piledriver gets no cover. Doink actually slams him but goes up top and jumps into a boot to the jaw. A cross body attempt by the Clown doesn’t work as Crush hits a powerslam before clotheslining Doink to the floor.

Doink tries to crawl under the ring but gets hit with a gorilla press back in the ring. Crush puts on the head vice (finisher) but as Doink gets to the ropes, the referee is bumped. The vice goes on again but another Doink comes out from under the ring with the cast. He blasts Crush in the head with it and the original Doink gets the pin.

Rating: D+. This was basically a squash until Doink got in some not terrible offense. Again though, this was when Crush was about to get pushed to the moon, so he loses to Doink? The Clown character had a ton of potential, but instead of going with something interesting like the Joker, we got FUN Doink soon after this, because that’s interesting stuff right?

Japanese tourist jokes aren’t funny so here are a bunch of them.

Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund

This is right before Razor turned face and it’s clear why given how big the pop he gets here is. Backlund offers a handshake and gets a toothpick in the face instead. A LOUD Razor chant opens things up as Backlund is shoved into the corner. Ramon slams him down and stomps away as Savage brings up Lex Luger knocking Bret Hart out cold earlier today.

It comes up out of nowhere in the middle of this match because there’s no reason for this match to take place. Leave it to JR to bring it back to the match as Backlund makes his comeback. A butterfly suplex puts Razor down and there’s Backlund’s atomic drop. That gets no cover though, as Razor grabs a small package to pin the wrestler with a wrestling move.

Rating: D. This was a squash at a Wrestlemania in 1993. Razor would be turning face soon after this while Backlund did nothing at all for a LONG time until he went nuts and actually won the world title. Nothing to see here though and it was clear that the announcers didn’t care about the match at all.

We recap Money Inc. attacking Brutus Beefcake and injuring his face (again) on Raw. Hulk Hogan was watching and came back to save his little buddy. The champions (Money Inc.) says they’ll bankrupt Hogan and Beefcake. Oh and we hear about a black eye that Hogan has from working in the gym the previous night. I’ve heard a bunch of stories over that before, but the most common one I hear is Savage decking him in the eye because he thought Liz had cheated on him with Hogan. The other version (and possibly the real one) is that Hogan had an accident on a Jet-Ski.

Tag Titles: Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs

Jimmy Hart is with the challengers because of how the champions hurt Beefcake. Hogan and Beefcake clear the ring while the music is still playing as the match begins. The champions stall on the floor for awhile until we get down to Beefcake (in a red/yellow mask) vs. I.R.S. The tax dude immediately goes for the face and it’s off to DiBiase for more of the same. DiBiase hits a middle rope ax handle to the mask and injures himself in the process. Ted continues to act way dumber than he is by ramming the mask into the buckle. So why did the punches work earlier?

Beefcake rams DiBiase’s head into the buckle instead and in the match we should have gotten five years ago, it’s Hogan vs. DiBiase. Ten punches in the corner put Ted down so Hogan pounds on the mat a bit. Off to Beefcake for a slam before it’s back to hogan for more punching. DiBiase ducks low and is immediately punched in the face again. I.R.S. comes in again and is punched by both Maniacs. All challengers so far.

The champions try to walk out but Finkus Maximus (remember the Roman theme) says that if they leave, they lose the titles. They get back in and the fans are chanting for Hogan. Ted goes for the throat to finally take over and I.R.S. chokes away a bit from the floor. More choking by DiBiase ensues before he cranks it up with the Million Dollar Dream. Savage: “They’re hanging from the rafter! Well they would if they had rafters. They have columns here and they’re hanging from them!”

I.R.S. tries to interfere for some reason but it allows Beefcake to come in with his own sleeper and put DiBiase out to break the hold and buy Hogan a breather. Hogan pops up and the double tag brings in Schyster to face Beefcake. An atomic drop puts Ted on the floor but the tax dude gets in a shot to Beefcake’s back to take over. Dibiase comes back in and rips the mask off of Brutus’ face so the champions can work over the face.

Beefcake comes back with a double clothesline out of nowhere but instead of tagging he puts I.R.S. in the sleeper. Ted breaks it up but the referee is bumped in the process. Hogan comes in like a hero and hits both guys with the steel mask but there’s no referee. What else do you do in this situation? You have Jimmy Hart turn his jacket inside out so it has white and black stripes and have him count then CELEBRATE LIKE YOU WON THE FREAKING BELTS. Another referee comes out to explain to Hogan how stupid he is and give Money Inc. the win by DQ.

Rating: D+. The match was ok at best but the ending is so dumb that I can barely comprehend it. I mean…..HOW STUPID CAN HOGAN POSSIBLY BE??? The guy has been around for nearly ten years and he thinks that would actually work? The match was just ok as it was mainly choking and punching for the first half, which is decent but nothing mind blowing. Then the ending sucked the life out of my brain which is normal for Hogan a lot of the time.

Lots of posing ensues but then the Maniacs open Money Inc.’s briefcase. They find tax forms, cash, and a brick. Heenan: “Well you never know when you’re gonna need a brick.” Hogan gives the money away and Heenan is suddenly a huge fan.

Todd Petingill finds Natalie Cole (singer I think) and the owner of Caesar’s Palace who are as riveting as you would expect.

Mr. Perfect says he’s going to solve the Lex Luger puzzle.

Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect

That sounds pretty awesome on paper. Anyway, Luger is the Narcissist at this point and comes out with some women in bikinis with thongs, sending Heenan through the roof. Well over the top of the columns at least. Perfect gets a very solid pop here but he would be used sparingly until he left in the fall. They trade headlocks to start and Luger bails to the corner. Now they trade hammerlocks and Luger bails to the ropes again.

Perfect hits a dropkick to send Luger to the outside as the crowd is staying hot. Back in and Luger starts using the power but Perfect blocks a big boot attempt. There’s the Robinsdale Crunch on Luger’s knee and Perfect cranks on it a bit for fun. We head to the corner for some LOUD chops but Lex whips him into the corner a few times to take over. We head to the floor with Luger ramming the injured back into the apron, followed by a backbreaker in the ring for two.

Perfect fights out of the corner with right hands but Luger scoops his legs and puts his own feet on the ropes for two. Mr. comes back with a nice sunset flip for two but a quick sleeper attempt is broken up. Back up and they slug it out a bit more with Perfect hitting a backdrop to take over. A slingshot sends Luger into the buckle and a forearm to the head gets two. Perfect hits a clothesline and neckbreaker for two each, as does a kind of missile dropkick. Luger wins the fight over a backslide and even though Perfect gets his feet in the ropes, Luger gets the pin anyway.

Rating: C. Decent match here but it never hit the level they were capable of. That ending was actually designed to set up something at the NEXT Wrestlemania which was unheard of at this point in time. Anyway, decent match here but it’s a disappointment due to how good this could and should have been.

Luger knocks him out post match and leaves. Perfect finally staggers after him and the fight starts again, until Shawn Michaels helps beat up Perfect.

Savage yells at Heenan for supporting Luger too much.

Gorilla Monsoon talks about the remaining matches.

Giant Gonzalez vs. Undertaker

Gonzalez is a legit 7’7 and is working for Harvey Wippleman for revenge on Undertaker after Undertaker got rid of Kamala. Taker comes out in a chariot and carrying a vulture. Undertaker literally only comes up to Gonzalez’s chest. Some uppercuts stagger the Giant but he grabs Taker by the throat to stop him cold. Taker climbs to the second rope and grabs Gonzalez by the throat, only to get hit low to stop him again.

Old School staggers the Giant a bit but he comes back with a clothesline to take over. Taker is thrown across the ring and we get a standing chinlock by the monster. The famous one fights up but gets thrown to the outside with ease. Taker is sent into the steps and we head back inside. Gonzalez pounds away a bit more but Taker slugs away, knocking Gonzalez down to one knee. Wippleman throws in a rag, which apparently the announcers can smell a chemical on from twenty feet away in an outdoor arena with over 15,000 people in it. Apparently it’s ether or something, earning Taker a DQ win.

Rating: D-. Gonzalez was AWFUL which really hurt things a lot. The main issue Undertaker had at this point was no one had any idea what to do with him. They just had him fight monsters for years on end which you can only watch for so long. This story would be reused about 12 years later with Undertaker playing Undertaker, Daivari playing Wippleman and Great Khali playing Gonzalez.

Referees check on the unconscious Undertaker as Gonzalez chokeslams a referee. The fans chant for Hogan but a gong goes off and Taker staggers out to beat up the monster.

We recap Jim Duggan being destroyed by Yokozuna. The fat man did the same to Bret Hart as well, setting up this match. In the back, Hogan says he wants the first title shot against either Hart of the Jap. His words, not mine.

Todd Pettingill continues to annoy fans.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Bret is defending against Yoko who won the Royal Rumble. It wasn’t an automatic title shot yet but starting the following year it would be. Bret hits a quick dropkick and pounds away but a single shot knocks the champion away. A big tackle runs Bret over and sends him to the outside but he trips Yoko up to take him down. Bret pounds away but it doesn’t do a lot of damage. Yoko wins a battle of the clotheslines and a big old legdrop crushes the champ’s face.

Off to a nerve hold for a bit but Bret gets his feet up in the corner to block a charge. A middle rope bulldog puts the monster down for two which is a victory in and of itself. Yoko superkicks Bret down and it’s right back to the nerve hold. Bret fights up and makes his comeback, finally knocking Yoko down with a middle rope clothesline. A buckle pad is ripped off somewhere in there and Bret rams him face first into it. Yoko falls on his stomach and Bret gets the Sharpshooter, only to have Fuji throw salt in the champ’s face. That’s actually enough for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. Bret did what he could but there’s a limit to what you can get out of a big fat guy like this. The ending is pretty lame and the match lasted less than nine minutes. That just doesn’t fit for a Wrestlemania main event but thankfully the rematch the next year would get more time and would be MUCH better.

Hogan runs out to check out Hart, so Mr. Fuji issues a challenge to Hogan for a title match RIGHT NOW. Bret tells Hogan to go get him and the fight is on.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna

Fuji misses a salt through, clothesline, legdrop, new champion.

Hogan poses a lot to end the show. Yeah that’s how Wrestlemania ends: in 22 seconds.

Overall Rating: D. The opening matches are as good as you’ll find for two straight openers at Mania in a long time, but after that it’s ALL downhill. The ending here was just stupid. First off, pride or whatever, WHY WOULD YOU GIVE A FRESH HULK HOGAN A WORLD TITLE SHOT AFTER YOU JUST WON THE BELT??? On top of that, we had some stupid endings with the tag title match and the Undertaker match, making this even worse. The problem with this show is other than the openers, it isn’t entertaining. I’ve never liked this show and most people don’t either, which is easy to understand.

Ratings Comparison

Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B+

Redo: B

Steiner Brothers vs. Headshrinkers

Original: B+

Redo: B

Doink the Clown vs. Crush

Original: D

Redo: D+

Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund

Original: C-

Redo: D

Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez

Original: F+

Redo: D-

Yokozuna vs. Bret Hart

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Yokozuna vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: F+

Redo: D

I actually liked it better this time. Man alive I must have been in a bad mood for the first one.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/16/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-9-wrestlemania-goes-outside/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Thunder – October 18, 2000: The WCW Rumble

Thunder
Date: October 18, 2000
Location: Rod Laver Arena, Melbourne, Australia
Commentators: Stevie Ray, Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone

We’ll wrap up the Australian tour with one of wrestling’s best traditions: a battle royal for a future title shot. In this case it’s all for the #1 contendership with the title shot coming on the Nitro after Halloween Havoc. These overseas shows have been hit or miss so it should be interesting to see how this one goes. Let’s get to it.

We see Sam Greco working out like any martial arts wrestler (in theory) does. He’ll be interviewed later.

Rey Mysterio vs. Mike Sanders

Before the match, Sanders praises Nash and the Thrillers but makes sure not to swear in the process. I can get behind that theory. This is going to be a non-title match so here’s Cat to make it No DQ as well. You know, because Rey Mysterio can get so violent and this will in no way allow interference by any of Sanders’ cronies.

Cat sits in on commentary as Mysterio takes over to start, which is made even better when Sanders lays on the middle rope for a legdrop. As in he walked over there and got into position for the move with no provocation so Rey could drop a leg on him. A top rope splash gives Rey two and now let’s look at the announcers cracking each other up. Rey bulldogs him down as this is pretty much the last thing you want to do to a champion. Then again O’Haire and Jindrak have been treated like goons for weeks and still have the belts so maybe Sanders is on to something here.

The Bronco Buster connects but Rey gets crotched on the top. Shouldn’t that have a similar impact? Sanders yells at Cat for some reason, allowing Rey to come back with a guillotine legdrop for two. A victory roll a few seconds later is enough to put Sanders away. No idea why this needed to be No DQ.

Rating: D+. Some of Rey’s high spots were good but this did more harm than good. Why WCW feels the need to have their young champions lose over and over is beyond me but that’s what we’re going to be seeing for the time being because Heaven forbid someone actually get over around here.

Shane Douglas promises to win the battle royal tonight. I wouldn’t bet on that one chum.

Video on Kronik vs. Goldberg.

Kronik jumps Goldberg from behind, possibly taking him out of the battle royal later. Smart move if nothing else.

Shane Douglas vs. Big Vito

Vito sucks up to the fans and wants to get his hands on Reno. You might try Nevada instead of Australia then. They circle each other to start until Vito gives him an atomic drop for a comedic sell job. Another atomic drop takes us to the floor and Shane gets backdropped outside for good measure. Vito hits a quick suplex and drops a headbutt for one, followed by his always good looking top rope elbow for double that. That means it’s chain time but a shot to Vito’s head only sets up the Pittsburgh Plunge for two. Not that it matters as the Franchiser ends Vito a few seconds later.

Rating: D. This was what you would expect: take someone who was hot a few years back and put them over someone you’ve been pushing lately because of whatever reason they have at the moment. Oh and make sure that the guy challenging for the Hardcore Title soon after this loses as soon as weapons get involved.

Goldberg beats up Ron Harris for no apparent reason.

Mike Awesome and Crowbar are ready for the battle royal tonight.

Boogie Knights vs. Harris Twins

This could be….well it’s going to be something for sure. After the Knights do some catchphrases, only Don comes out for some reason. The actual team takes over with a nice missile dropkick but Wright charges into a Rock Bottom. Cue Ron for a sidewalk slam on Disco….and an elbow to the Duck. Disco gets dropped face first onto the mat to send him outside where he finds ANOTHER Duck. A Duck shot to Ron sets up a high cross body to give Disco the pin.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what the point of this one was but it really didn’t work. I get the Goldberg stuff earlier in the night but the Boogie Knights vs. one of the Harris Twins really isn’t the way to get the crowd into a show. The Knights are actually a decent team though and that’s all they need to be since they aren’t likely to get near the titles anytime soon.

Team Canada promises to end General Rection’s career at Halloween Havoc. An argument breaks out over who deserves the World Title shot.

Video on Steiner vs. Booker T.

Scott Steiner invites Pamela Paulshock to join him later tonight. At least he has good taste.

Elix Skipper comes out to run his mouth about how awesome he is until someone sneaks up on him.

Goldberg vs. Elix Skipper

A gorilla press into a World’s Strongest Slam sets up the two moves and we’re done in a little over a minutes.

Post match Goldberg says that’s 11-0 and he’s coming for Kronik. As usual I’ll remind you: other than YOU’RE NEXT, Goldberg shouldn’t be talking.

As he’s done for weeks now, Jeff Jarrett says Sting is soft.

Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner vs. Kidman/Konnan

Steiner throws Kidman around like the cruiserweight jobber he is now and we’re already on the signature stuff. The gorilla press sets up the push-ups, followed by a quick stomping in the corner. Kidman gets in a quick dropkick before Konnan comes in with the rolling clothesline. It’s off to Kidman vs. Jarrett with the Sky High planting Jeff for two, only to have Torrie come out and kidnap Tygress. The top rope Angle Slam sets up the Recliner to put Kidman away in a hurry.

Rating: D. So much for Kidman meaning much around here anymore. Why bother keeping him strong when you can have Steiner and Jarrett beat up the Filthy Animals for fun? This was your usual squashing of two midcarders who could go somewhere in WCW but instead they get beaten down for the sake of Jeff Jarrett and Scott Steiner, the latter of whom is already #1 contender.

Goldberg is still here.

Ric Flair arrives.

Booker and Sting want the Tag Team Titles. For reasons that aren’t clear, Booker is in the battle royal tonight.

It’s time for the interview with Sam Greco who is officially part of WCW. He’s ready to be aggressive in the ring and is already friends with Goldberg. Tony asks about being a martial artist like the Cat but Greco would rather focus on wrestling in the ring. Greco talks about being a Rocky movie with a Goldberg intensity. We wrap it up with Greco saying he’ll be bringing intensity to the table three or four times. From what I can find, Greco only wrestled three times with all three matches in Japan and the first being in November 2002.

The Thrillers sing a little Backstreet Boys. Sanders is told to make sure the team keeps the titles tonight.

Video on Jarrett vs. Sting.

Tag Team Titles: Booker T./Sting vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

Booker and Sting are challenging. Sting and O’Haire get things going with the champions taking over early on until Jindrak comes in to send Sting outside. In a ridiculous power display, the champs throw Sting over the top and back inside. For some reason Madden asks if the Funk Brothers are up and coming contenders. Sting elbows them both out of the corner and the hot tag brings in Booker to clean house. The ax and side kicks get two on Sean and it’s a double finisher, only to have Mike Sanders come in and jump the referee for the DQ. After the champions were knocked out in less than three minutes of course.

Sting and Booker pose as Tony says the fans deserved a better match than that. Well yeah.

This Week in WCW Motorsports was very bad as the car didn’t qualify for the race.

Kronik vs. Perfect Event

Clark doesn’t waste any time and dives off the apron to take Palumbo out, leaving Stasiak alone for a bit. The power guys beat on him like he’s the weak link of the Thrillers, which is the way the announcers are presenting him for whatever reason. I mean, ignore the team that loses all the time when you can make fun of Stasiak right? The full nelson slam causes Stasiak to kick Palumbo in the face, setting up High Times for the pin on Chuck.

Post match here’s Goldberg but he gets chaired down, followed by High Times.

Here’s Ric Flair to be interviewed by Mark Madden. Ric talks about the fans being amazing in the best country in the world because the women here are amazing. However, he’s here to bring his son home. Cue David in a white coat and Ric gets right to the point: they can have all the women they want for the next thirty days if he’ll come home. David says no so Ric leaves, causing Madden to yell at David, basically erasing all the times that he ripped on Ric months ago. With Mark yelling, David tries to give him a blood test.

Halloween Havoc video.

Countdown to Armageddon

This is basically a Royal Rumble allegedly with two minute intervals. Mike Sanders and the Cat start things off and yeah they’re not even trying to hide the fake randomness. They slug it out to start with Cat getting in an elbow and a kick because what else was he going to hit? Shawn Stasiak is in at #3 and it’s time for the run of the mill team beating on a single guy.

Chuck Palumbo is in at #4 and the intervals are more like thirty to forty seconds. The three on one beatdown continues until it’s Disco Inferno in at #5. Disco is smart enough to hang back while everyone beats on Cat until Alex Wright comes in at #6 because RANDOM. It’s rather amusing to hear Tony try to push this as a random draw which WWE was nice enough to drop years ago. Crowbar, minus the 70s stuff, is in at #7. Naturally this turns into a debate about whether or not it’s bad to work at a service station.

Ron Harris is in at #8 as these intervals are getting shorter and shorter. Don Harris is in at #9 as the ring is way too full. Jim Duggan is in at #10 as there’s barely time to write out who is entering before Penzer starts the next countdown. Duggan slugs away for a bit and it’s Lieutenant Loco in at #11. Kevin Nash is in at #12 and we take a break to come back with Nash just getting in the ring to get rid of Duggan, Loco, Sanders and Cat in just a few seconds. The Boogie Knights get rid of Crowbar but get dumped by Nash as David Flair is in at #13.

Perfect Event gets rid of the Harris Twins but get in a fight, allowing Stasiak to hit a horrible right hand to get rid of Palumbo. Stasiak jumps out to avoid facing Nash, who dumps David a few seconds later. Corporal Cajun is in at #14 and eliminated fifteen seconds later, leaving Nash alone. Kwee Wee is in at #15 and is eliminated even faster than Cajun. At least we don’t have to sit around in the meantime.

Rey Mysterio is in at #16 and actually puts Nash down with a springboard missile dropkick. Mysterio escapes a Jackknife and here’s Booker T., as in the World Champion in a match for the #1 contendership, in at #17. That goes nowhere so here’s Mike Awesome at #18. Sting is in at #19 as we’re getting some interesting names in there but the short intervals are making it really hard to care. Everyone goes after Nash, which Madden says is like an old kung fu movie. Nash gets dumped as Jeff Jarrett comes in at #20, though Scott Steiner comes in as well. We’ll call that #21.

Sting Cactus Clotheslines Jeff out for the double elimination (with Steiner leaving as well) and it’s Kidman in at #22. Awesome dumps Booker off camera (oh come on), leaving us with Awesome, Kidman and Mysterio. Lance Storm is in at #23 and nothing happens until Big Vito is in at #24. Sean O’Haire is in at #25 as the announcers can’t remember what number we’re on.

Mark Jindrak is in at #26 as they aren’t even hiding the random stuff here. Konnan is in at #27 as the mindless brawling continues. Kronik, as in both members, come in at #28 and Adams gets rid of Kidman in a hurry. Rey and Konnan go out as well, followed by Storm and Vito. The intervals have stopped and Adams hits the ugliest piledriver I’ve ever seen to thankfully not cripple Awesome.

That’s not enough to get rid of him though so here’s Goldberg, apparently not an entrant because he can’t get a title shot (but the WORLD CHAMPION can). Jindrak and O’Haire are put out and Clark quickly follows. Adams tries to bring in a chair but gets speared, setting up a double clothesline from Awesome and Goldberg to give Mike the win, thereby confusing the fans since Goldberg is still in the ring as Awesome is announced as the winner.

Rating: C. Some really questionable moments aside, this was actually pretty enjoyable. I kind of liked the hyper intervals as it kept the match from dragging because people like Jindrak, Loco and Kwee Wee certainly aren’t getting a title shot so why pretend they will? Awesome winning is a nice surprise, even though the 70s music playing to end the show really made it feel silly. It’s good to see someone fresh in the main event instead of having the same five or six guys get title shot after title shot. This was as good as it was going to be and they managed to avoid most of the stupid battle royal tropes so call it a nice surprise.

Overall Rating: D+. The big main event helped but the rest of the show still had so many of the same problems that regularly plague WCW. As is so often the case, the World Title is the only thing that matters, assuming you have any reason to care about it after all the damage it’s taken over the last year. Not a terrible show but still bad enough to fit the WCW mold to a tee.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Roadblock 2016: Are We There Yet?

Roadblock 2016
Date: March 12, 2016
Location: Ricoh Coliseum, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Byron Saxton

This is a special live show between Fastlane and Wrestlemania with a big main event in Dean Ambrose challenging HHH for the WWE World Title. It’s not often that the Wrestlemania main event could be changed this soon before the date of the show but stranger things have happened. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on the World Title match and pitches the idea that Dean is blocking the road to Wrestlemania. Well they never have been too subtle so why start now?

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. King Barrett/Sheamus

New Day is defending. Before the match, Woods says that when you look at them, you see hips that don’t lie, which of course means it’s time for a little dancing. They actually have a box of BootyO’s cereal and Big E. drops to his knees to speak like a child for some insults about the League. Unfortunately they couldn’t come up with any insults for Rusev so Big E. promises to eat his cereal to grow big and strong. That box actually looks real so well done for whoever made that.

Kofi headscissors Sheamus down to start and it’s already time for some posing. If New Day hasn’t turned face yet, they might not even need to at this point. Sheamus pulls Kofi out of the corner and brings Barrett in for his assortment of punches. Big E. comes in for his backbreaker and some dancing before the Unicorn Stampede takes off.

Winds of Change puts Kofi down and Sheamus adds the Irish Curse as the heels (well the stronger heels) take over. A top rope shoulder gets two for Sheamus and the fans tell Barrett that he can’t wrestle. Seriously? I know Barrett isn’t as sharp as he used to be but he’s getting the Khali chant now?

Kofi comes back with a dropkick and the hot tag brings in Big E. for a string of suplexes. Everything breaks down and Kofi cleans house, only to have Trouble in Paradise countered into the Cloverleaf. Barrett pulls Big E. off the apron but Kofi counters into a rollup for two. The SOS doesn’t get a count despite only existing to get near falls. Kofi goes up top but kind of crashes into Sheamus as he tries to dive over, giving us a bad looking botch. Barrett kicks Big E. in the head but Woods offers a distraction, allowing Kofi to get in a cheap shot so the Big Ending can put Barrett away at 8:38. Big E. seems to be favoring his arm.

Rating: C. Hopefully that’s it for this feud as I’m not really sure why they’re fighting other than New Day started talking about the League one day. New Day is going to be a great act as faces but I’m not sure what kind of a shelf life they’ll have before they’ll told how to be funny and outgoing and the act dies as a result. At least they’re on fire now and it’s fun to watch.

Paul Heyman talks about making Toronto the capital of Suplex City and promises that Bray will be conquered by the Beast.

We recap Y2AJ splitting and Jericho burning one of their shirts on Smackdown.

Here’s Jericho for his match but he has to insult the fans for cheering for AJ instead of him. Canadian fans are always behind the times eh? Jericho calls himself the greatest icon in the history of this country, drawing a WE WANT BRET chant. After telling the fans that they’ll never get Bret again, Jericho talks about being embarrassed to be Canadian. Moving away from Canada was the smartest thing he ever did because Canadian fans chant for the flavor of the month. That includes when they cheered for Jack Swagger when he beat Jericho for the World Title years ago. Jericho insults WE THE PEOPLE and it’s time for a match.

Chris Jericho vs. Jack Swagger

Jericho slaps him in the face to start and bails to the floor in a smart move. The chase doesn’t go well for Chris as Swagger catches him back inside and hammers away in the corner. The announcers run down Jericho’s career, talking about Baba and Tenryu in Japan because saying he’s a ten time Intercontinental Champion and main evented Wrestlemania would be going over most fans heads.

Jericho comes back by sending Swagger into the barricade for two and we hit the chinlock. Jack fights up and we get a CM PUNK chant for no logical reason. Some clotheslines have Jericho in trouble and the Vader Bomb gets two. Jericho can’t get the Walls so it’s the enziguri instead. The Codebreaker is broken up with a powerslam but the gutwrench powerbomb is countered into the Walls for the tap out at 7:55.

Rating: C+. Better match than I was expecting here as Swagger continues to be fine when he isn’t talking or trying to be anything bigger than a power guy who can do some submission stuff. This was fine for a way to keep Jericho’s awesome heel run going, but the fans still chanting for him after that heel promo isn’t the best sign.

JBL shouts YOU STILL GOT IT as Jericho goes up the ramp, making him even more annoying than usual.

We recap the NXT Tag Team Title match with Cole saying the Revival are the new Tag Team Champions. As in the Revival who won the belts nearly five months ago. The Revival thinks Enzo and Cass aren’t serious enough and took out Colin Cassady’s knee so the challengers are coming for revenge and the titles.

NXT Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady vs. Revival

Revival (Scott Dawson/Dash Wilder) are defending and the challengers have Carmella with them. Enzo and Dash get things going with Amore nailing a dropkick before it’s off to Cass for the big side slam. Wilder dives into a right hand to the ribs, followed by Cass picking up Enzo and throwing him at Dawson to keep control. They do the same thing again with Enzo flying over the top to take both of them out, drawing a loud NXT chant.

Back in and Dawson gets a blind tag to send Enzo shoulder first into the post, giving the champs a target. Dawson cranks on an armbar as JBL tries to say the Revival are a throwback to the late 90s tag teams. Add tag team history to the list of things JBL doesn’t know much about. Enzo gets sent into the buckle again and stomped in the Tree of Woe, only to do a situp to send Dawson into the post.

Cass comes in to clean house with a big boot and the East River Crossing to Wilder but the Rocket Launcher is broken up. Carmella slaps Dawson but the distraction lets the champs hit the Shatter Machine (picture a 3D into a Codebreaker) on the floor. Back in and Enzo hits a top rope DDT on Wilder and grabs a rollup for a close near fall on Dawson. The champs get back up though and a Shatter Machine out of the corner gets the pin on Amore at 10:15.

Rating: B+. Please send them up to the main roster already as it’s pretty clear that we’re not getting the title change anytime soon. Enzo and Cass are an awesome act but if they’re not getting the titles then there’s no point in keeping them down in NXT. It’s clear that they’re ready for the main roster so let them go and do the fun feud with New Day before they’re turned into the tag team Santino.

Earlier today, Natalya dedicated her match tonight to Bret Hart and thinks it could get her a step closer to the Divas Title. Charlotte came in and laughed at her but refused to put the title on the line. Natalya said Bret must have been right about the Flairs being cowards and Charlotte made it a title match, which I guess she can just do because contracts work in a weird way in WWE.

Divas Title: Charlotte vs. Natalya

Charlotte is defending. Natalya works on an arm to start but gets caught in a bodyscissors. They trade some holds on the amt with Natalya getting in a leg lock, followed by a surfboard. Back up and Charlotte pulls her to the floor for a crash and takes over with the stomps in the corner. Cole, who already used the term “Divas Wrestler” in this match, compares Charlotte to Mildred Burke. Did Matt Striker take over the commentary division this week?

The discus forearm is broken up and Charlotte starts in on the knee. There’s a chop block to make Natalya scream a lot but she’s still able to kick the champ out to the floor. Now the discus forearm connects and but Charlotte counters the Sharpshooter into the Figure Four. Natalya gets Charlotte under the ropes for a weird counter and Natural Selection gets two.

Charlotte goes up for something but gets countered into a Batista Bomb for a very close near fall. You could tell the fans bought into that one. The Figure Four is countered into the Sharpshooter but Ric helps pull Charlotte to the ropes. Natalya swings at Ric and gets rolled up with Charlotte’s feet on the ropes to retain at 13:35.

Rating: B. What is up with this show being so awesome? Natalya is one of those women that you can put in there with anyone and get a passable match but this felt like she was actually getting close to the title instead of just being there to put Charlotte over. I liked this one a lot more than I was expecting and that’s always a good thing.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Bray Wyatt, which is mainly over the Wyatt Family eliminating Brock from the Royal Rumble. Lesnar is out for revenge tonight.

Brock Lesnar vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray talks about all the people Brock has conquered but tonight there’s a deal with the devil, which has changed this match intro a handicap match.

Brock Lesnar vs. Bray Wyatt/Luke Harper

Heyman says that Brock is FIGHTING out of the conqueror’s corner for a cool sounding intro. Bray bails to the apron to start so Harper takes the first suplex, sending him out to the floor. Brock stares at Wyatt, allowing Harper to get back inside for a suicide dive. Two boots to the face stagger Brock and the discus clothesline gets a nearer fall than you would expect.

We hit a crossface but Brock gets to his feet and slips between Harper’s legs for a German suplex. Is there anything this guy can’t do? A superkick doesn’t do much so Brock throws him down with two more German suplexes. Harper gets tossed around even more as the fans keep count for Brock. The F5 puts Harper away at 4:01. Brock and Bray never made contact.

Rating: C. This was fine and they did a good job of protecting Bray here. Harper got in some strong looking offense too so everyone comes out looking fine. I’m not sure where they’re going with Bray vs. Brock but maybe they’ll head there in a few months instead of doing it at Payback or whatever they’re calling the show after Wrestlemania.

Sami Zayn vs. Stardust

Another bonus match. An early CODY chant gets on Stardust’s nerves as the announcers talk about the Missing Link for no logical reason. Sami grabs an armbar and some armdrags for a nice start. There go the OLE chants, which Cole calls an ode to Sami’s former persona, just in case you didn’t think Cole knew everything about wrestling ever. Stardust sends him back first into the apron to take over, setting up a cartwheel.

Some knees to the back followed by a waistlock have Sami in trouble and Stardust tries a reverse Boston crab (Colt Cabana’s Billy Goat’s Curse). A Matt Hardy Side Effect gets two on Sami and a top rope superplex is good for the same as this has been one sided for a long time. Sami pops back up with clotheslines and right hands in the corner before low bridging Stardust out to the floor. There’s the big flip dive over the ropes and the Blue Thunder Bomb gets two. Stardust comes right back with a Disaster Kick for the same but gets suplexed into the corner, setting up the Helluva Kick for the pin at 12:43.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one as much as some of the other matches tonight but it was still fun enough. The problem here was they were clearly setting up the comeback all match and then the back work didn’t go anywhere as Sami just popped up and did his big stuff. At least the right guy won though and a lot of Sami’s strength comes from when he’s beaten down and has to fight against all odds. Good enough stuff here though and that’s all it needed to be.

We recap HHH vs. Dean Ambrose which is all about Dean rebelling against the Authority and doing a much better job of it than Roman Reigns ever could.

WWE World Title: Dean Ambrose vs. HHH

Dean is challenging. Feeling out process to start as the announcers give out even more stats and figures (HHH hasn’t had a singles match since Wrestlemania XXXI or a title defense since 2009). Dean headlocks him down and some armdrags keep HHH in trouble. Back up and Ambrose lays across the top rope ala Shawn Michaels and HHH isn’t happy. The CM Punk chants start again and Dean grabs HHH’s nose as he armdrags the champ down a second time.

Thankfully the chants turn into the standard LET’S GO AMBROSE/HHH as Dean gets kneed in the ribs. They head outside with Dean getting in a clothesline before wrapping the leg around the post. HHH actually tries a Pedigree on the floor but gets his legs swept out, only to kick Dean into the steps to change momentum. HHH starts in on the back and puts on a Crossface, followed by a Rings of Saturn of all things.

JBL talks about the Toronto fans seeing their hero Whipper Billy Watson win back in 1956. A spinebuster gets two but Dean pops back up and gets the same off a bulldog. Dirty Deeds is broken up but the facebuster sets up a rebound lariat for two on the champ. I still don’t like the idea of someone taking a hard shot to the face and hitting an offensive move a second later. That never works for me.

HHH’s leg starts giving out on him again, allowing Dean to counter a Pedigree attempt into a Figure Four. Cole: “He’s going to tap HHH for the title!” Dean switches over to a Sharpshooter but HHH makes the ropes for the save. Dirty Deeds connects but Dean’s foot is under the ropes for a good false finish.

A hard whip sends HHH over the ropes and out to the floor, setting up the suicide dive. Dean hits the top rope elbow and even throws in a Suck It. HHH gets knocked onto the announcers’ table but avoids the elbow off the barricade for a huge crash. It’s only good for a nine count so HHH hits a quick Pedigree to retain at 24:33.

Rating: A-. Awesome match here and I’m sure that three count is going to be Dean’s consolation prize. There wasn’t much of a chance that they were going to change the title here but giving us the false hope was a nice feeling. HHH winning the match (mostly) clean is fine enough but I could go for Dean actually winning something big every now and then.

Overall Rating: A-. I had a great time with this show even though it doesn’t change much of anything. Sometimes all you need is a good night of wrestling and that’s what we had here. The worst thing all night was Stardust vs. Sami in a match that certainly wasn’t bad. This show worked out really well and hopefully will give WWE some of the positive momentum they’ve been lacking so much lately.

Results

New Day b. King Barrett/Sheamus – Big Ending to Barrett

Chris Jericho b. Jack Swagger – Walls of Jericho

Revival b. Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady – Shatter Machine to Amore

Charlotte b. Natalya – Rollup with feet on the ropes

Brock Lesnar b. Luke Harper/Bray Wyatt – F5 to Harper

Sami Zayn b. Stardust – Helluva Kick

HHH b. Dean Ambrose – Pedigree

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Attack on Wrestling Podcast #5

I’m back on Killjoy’s show as we discuss the week in wrestling and I ramble on about a lot of stuff, including the upcoming History of the Intercontinental Title book.

http://s63.podbean.com/pb/6ff0d2162b7d943d9aa099c200ac2e89/56e3c22d/data1/fs45/782911/uploads/AOW_5.mp3




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania VIII: That’s A Surprise

Wrestlemania VIII
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re into another huge stadium here and the interesting thing is that Hogan, while in the final match, isn’t in the title scene at all. We’ve got a double main event here of Hogan vs. Sid in Hogan’s “retirement” match and the still pretty new Flair defending the world title against Randy Savage in a match built not only around the title but also Liz, which we’ll get into later. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how it’s a double main event. They’re not really going for the epic feeling here it seems.

Reba McIntyre sings the national anthem.

Tito Santana vs. Shawn Michaels

Tito is El Matador now and Shawn is freshly heel. Bobby says Reba is Tito’s sister: Arriba McIntyre. Say it out loud and you’ll get the joke. After taking forever to get Sherri to the floor, Tito gets a fast two off a cross body. They head to the mat for a headlock on Shawn which doesn’t last long. Michaels avoids a punch to the face but gets clotheslined out to the floor instead.

Back to the chinlock which doesn’t go anywhere this time either, so Shawn takes over in the corner. That also goes nowhere so Santana punches him in the face and takes it right back to the mat. Shawn finally comes back and pounds away even more, this time sending Tito out to the floor. A backbreaker gets two for Shawn and we hit the chinlock again, this time by the future world champion. Santana fights up but walks into the superkick for no cover.

The Backdrop Suplex (Shawn’s old finisher) is countered and there’s the flying forearm to send Shawn to the floor. Back in and a slingshot forearm puts Shawn down again as does a big atomic drop. Tito’s forearm to the back of the head sends Shawn to the outside again, only to have Sherri trip Tito up on a suplex attempt to give Michaels the pin.

Rating: C. This was ok but it was a lot of kicking and chinlocks for an opening match. Tito was good for giving you a guaranteed decent performance out there, so putting him against Shawn was a good move for the most part. The match wasn’t great or anything but it did a decent job at what it was supposed to do.

Gene is on the old school interview platform and calls out the Legion of Doom. With them however is their former manager Paul Ellering complete with the rolled up Wall Street Journal. Ellering talks about bringing the LOD together before talking about how this is the beginning of the end. They want the tag titles back but would never get them again. Hawk says they were a runaway train, but now look who’s driving it. They don’t care who the champions are, because they’re coming for the gold.

Jake Roberts says there’s no truth to the rumor of him bringing a snake to the ring. We get a clip of Jake slamming Taker’s hand in a coffin and laying out a helpless Paul Bearer.

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

A right hand to the face has no effect on Taker so Jake pounds away so more. Heenan is already freaking out about how Taker can’t be hurt as is his custom. Jake knocks him to the floor but Undertaker lands on his feet. Roberts is pulled to the floor as well and rammed into the post to give the dead man control. Heenan cracks jokes and says he thinks he has two brilliant minds. Gorilla: “I’m in big trouble.”

As Heenan talks about Bearer earning the Urn, Taker chokes away in the corner and pounds on Jake for a bit. An elbow drop keeps Jake down and there’s the jumping clothesline for good measure. Out of NOWHERE, Jake hits the DDT to put Taker down but he sits up a few seconds later and grabs Jake by the throat. A second DDT puts Taker down again but Jake goes after Bearer instead. There’s the sit up and Undertaker follows Jake outside, hitting a tombstone on the FLOOR to end Jake and make Undertaker 2-0.

Rating: C-. The problem with these early Wrestlemania matches for Undertaker is that they didn’t have a ton of story or drama to them. Jake was in his last match for the company here before he went to WCW for a cup of coffee, so he didn’t seem to be giving it his all out there. The kicking out of the DDTs was impressive as was the Tombstone, but that’s about it.

Piper and Bret are facing each other later tonight and Piper talks about growing up near the Hart Family. Some jokes are cracked and Bret doesn’t take too kindly to it. Things get testy when Bret wants the IC Title back. This is much more of a match of respect than hatred.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. Bret Hart

Piper is defending. There’s a story here actually: Bret was “sick” and lost the title to Mountie, only to have Piper win it about a day and a half later. This is Bret’s rematch. Heenan: “How would you handle Piper if you were Bret?” Gorilla: “I would use my speed advantage. You?” Heenan: “Waffle him with a tire iron.” Bret takes him down to start and Piper spits in his face, basically becoming the heel of the match early on.

They trade arm holds to start but Piper can’t escape Bret’s non-evil clutches. Once he finally frees himself, it’s a dropkick to put Roddy down instead. Bret might have hurt his shoulder in the process, but of course he’s goldbricking, which gives him a two count via a small package. Piper slaps him in the face so Bret cross bodies both guys to the outside. Back in and Piper gets in a cheap shot which apparently busts Bret open. This was a big deal actually as Bret claimed it was a legit cut but in reality he bladed and lied to prevent punishment and still make it look good. Smart guy that Hitman.

Roddy pounds away for awhile and is reverting to his old style far more than he has in years. Bret comes back with a sunset flip for two and the mat is getting bloody in a hurry. Piper punches him down for two but Bret comes back with a forearm to send the champion to the outside. Back in and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Piper’s head lands on Bret’s ribs which should be a count but the referee sits up instead. Roddy goes up but Bret is goldbricking again, allowing him to slam Piper face first into the mat.

A suplex gets two for Hart and it’s time for the FIVE MOVES OF DOOM. Piper blocks the Sharpshooter though, so Bret settles for the middle rope elbow. Roddy blocks that too though with a boot to the face and they slug it out again. There goes the referee and Piper clotheslines Bret to the outside. As they come back in, Roddy grabs the ring bell to complete the heel turn. He lifts it up to crush Bret, only to stop himself and put on a sleeper instead. That proves to be his downfall though as Bret climbs up the corner and falls back on Piper for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. This might be Piper’s best matches ever but even rarer is seeing him pinned in the WWF. Piper was VERY protective of his character, meaning that he was very rarely pinned. The match was great here and wound up being Piper’s last match in the company for several years. Really good stuff here as Bret is on the verge of shooting up the card to the world title in the fall.

Piper puts the title on Hart after thinking about clocking him with the belt.

We hear from WBF Bodybuilding Pro Lex Luger. He wouldn’t have a major appearance again until January of 1993. Again, who thought bodybuilding on PPV was a good idea? That would be Mr. XFL, Vince McMahon.

The Mountie, the Nasty Boys and the Repo Man laugh evily.

Duggan, Slaughter, Virgil and Boss Man respond with nothing of note to say.

Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter/Virgil/Big Boss Man vs. Nasty Boys/Moutnie/Repo Man

Just a collection of lower midcard guys getting a Wrestlemania payday here. Neither team gets an entrance. Instead, Ray Combs of Family Feud is guest ring announcer for this and cracks a few jokes about the heels pre-match. The good guys clean house to start and hit a quadruple clothesline to clear the ring. Heenan announces that Shawn Michaels has left the building. Gorilla sums up our responses: “WHO CARES???”

Anyway Duggan and Sags start things off and it’s Jim hitting a few clotheslines to take over. Off to Slaughter who gets poked in the eye, allowing for the tag to Knobs. Slaughter pounds away to take over before it’s off to Boss Man for a boot to the face. Brian avoids a charge into the corner and Boss Man’s splash misses Repo Man as well, giving the heels control for a bit. Repo crotches himself and Boss Man slugs him down for good measure.

Off to Virgil who seems to mess up almost anything where he jumps into the air. Duggan tries to come in to save his partner but it’s back to Sags to beat on Virgil even more. A pumphandle slam gets two on Virgil and it’s back to Mountie. Everything breaks down and in the melee the Nastys are rammed together, allowing Virgil to steal the pin.

Rating: D. As I said, this was nothing more than a way to throw a bunch of guys onto the show at the same time. This was a much better idea than having four matches eat up a few minutes each as it accomplishes the same goal here. They were out there as filler before the world title match and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.

Flair and Perfect smile over having a large centerfold of Miss Elizabeth. I can’t imagine how teasing this angle was for thirteen year old boys. They say Savage is losing tonight and that Liz is leaving with Flair.

Savage won’t give any interviews.

To recap the world title match, Flair claims that he had a relationship with Liz before she was married to Savage, so tonight Savage is out for revenge and the title. Flair had some doctored photos and that’s about it, so it was more about humiliation than anything else. It’s a great angle and would still work perfectly to this day if done right.

WWF World Title: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

There’s no Liz in sight to start and Savage comes to the ring last. Oh and Mr. Perfect is in Flair’s corner which will come into play later. Flair tries to walk up the aisle so Savage decks him from behind. Perfect makes a save by throwing Randy down as things are looking chaotic already. They get into the ring and Savage starts fast with some shots into the corner and punches down onto Flair’s head.

Heenan is at his most biased ever and his voice is almost cracking already. A clothesline puts Flair down and a back elbow gets two. Flair comes back with a big backdrop to put Savage out on the floor as the champion takes over. Flair rams Savage’s back into the apron and takes over with a few suplexes including a belly to back for two. Heenan wants to see the pictures and I can’t say I blame him.

A big chop puts Savage down for two and we head to the floor. Savage has his back rammed into the apron again and Flair suplexes him back into the ring for two more. Randy comes back with a single right hand and the place ERUPTS. A swinging neckbreaker puts Flair down but he pokes Savage in the eye to take him down. The champ goes up top, only to jump into a clothesline from Savage. Savage whips him into the corner and we get a Flair Flip to the apron where Ric runs up top, only to jump into another clothesline for two.

Savage hits his third clothesline in a roll to send Flair out to the floor. A top rope ax handle sends Flair into the barricade followed by a shot into the post. Flair is busted open and there’s the Flair Flop on the floor. A suplex puts Flair down on the floor again as Heenan is begging for the match to be stopped. Back in and Savage pounds away before hitting a top rope ax handle for two.

The top rope elbow hits but Perfect breaks up the pin. Thankfully the referee doesn’t call for the bell as Perfect throws something to Ric. The referee is bumped but it’s not that bad. A shot to the face with the object puts Randy down but it only gets two. The fans are losing their minds on these kickouts. Flair pounds away and is pulled away by the referee, allowing Perfect to blast him in the knee with a chair.

This brings out Liz who marches through some suits (one of which being worn by Shane McMahon) as Flair works over the leg. The knee crusher sets up the Figure Four (complete with interference from Perfect). Heenan: “SHOW ME THE PICTURES!” Randy turns the hold over but Flair breaks it quickly. Savage’s leg is done but he grabs a two count off a small package. Flair says this is for Liz as he stomps on the knee even more. He grabs Savage’s leg but Savage gets in a quick right hand and rolls Flair up (with a handful of trunks) for the pin and the title.

Rating: A. If you ever want a match based on the good guy overcoming insurmountable odds, this is pretty high up on the list. Savage came back from EVERYTHING and while Liz was there, she wasn’t a major factor at all. The match is a masterpiece with both guys looking great. Savage was in a career resurgence, despite being world champion only three years earlier. Anyway, great match here and it still holds up very well today.

Post match Flair tries to kiss Liz, triggering another brawl. Perfect helps take Savage down and lets Flair pound away for a bit. Referees finally break it up and Savage is announced as the new champion to a big roar.

Flair, Perfect and Heenan go on a huge rant against Savage with Flair saying that Savage is going to be lying about being champion and lying about having the love of Liz. They tell Savage to do it again and claim that Savage was a cheater which won’t work again.

Savage gives a rebuttal, saying that he’s going to go after Flair no matter where or when it is. He hands Liz the title and says that it’s hers. As for Flair, Savage is for him and it’s going to continue. I love these two promos and they still work very well.

We recap the Wrestlemania VII press conference where Hogan was announced as the #1 contender. Sid wasn’t happy but joined Hogan in a tag match on SNME. However he turned on Hogan and left him alone against Undertaker and Flair. Sid then destroyed Beefcake’s Barber Shop set and wound up with a bunch of shampoo on his face in an unintentionally hilarious scene. We also get a montage of Sid beating up jobbers and Virgil.

Rick Martel makes a stupid joke about Tatanka scalping tickets.

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

There are Indians at ringside chanting for Tatanka. This is about two months after Tatanka debuted on TV so you should be able to figure out what’s going to happen pretty quickly here. Tatanka start off hot as Heenan explaining that Flair did nothing wrong. Gorilla shouts that Heenan is a liar, so Heenan challenges him to a fight. Martel makes a quick comeback and sends Tatanka out to the floor. Back in and Bobby makes Indian jokes as Martel stomps away a bit more. Rick goes up and gets crotched, allowing Tatanka to pound away even more. Out of nowhere a cross body pins Martel.

Rating: D+. The match was ok but it was nothing more than a way to give the fans a breather. Like I said, no one knew Tatanka at this point due to how little time he had been on TV. Martel was in total jobber to the stars territory by this point and would be gone pretty soon. Nothing to remember here at all.

Money Inc. isn’t worried about the Natural Disasters because they’ve stolen the Disasters’ manager in the form of Jimmy Hart.

The Disasters say they’re ready and are after the titles and Jimmy Hart.

Tag Titles: Money Inc. vs. Natural Disasters

Money Inc. is defending and is comprised of Ted DiBiase and I.R.S. DiBiase and Earthquake start things off with the heels (Money Inc.) getting beaten down and the rich man being knocked to the floor. Off to Typhoon vs. I.R.S. For osme arm work by the big guy. Typhoon misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to DiBiase….who is immediately beaten down as well. Typhoon misses a splash against the ropes and falls over the top and out to the floor.

I.R.S. cranks on a front facelock for a bit as Ted hits an ax handle off the middle rope for two. A double clothesline puts both guys down as this match is DRAGGING. Everything breaks down and the challengers take over. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and there’s the big splash from Typhoon. Jimmy Hart pulls Irwin out to break up the Earthquake splash and the champions walk out to retain the titles.

Rating: D-. I have no idea what the point of this was. The match wasn’t entertaining, it wasn’t good, and the match didn’t accomplish anything. I’m guessing this was supposed to be filler between the other matches, but we already had one of those and that’s what we’re about to get next. Nothing to see here at all.

Brutus Beefcake supports Hogan.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Skinner catches him with the tobacco juice to the face to start and hits a shoulder breaker for no cover. Skinner’s reverse DDT gets two but Owen gets tired of selling and rolls him up for the pin. This was about a minute long.

Gene is with Sid and the tall man calls him a fat bald headed oaf. Sid guarantees this is Hogan’s last match, which triggers an interview with Hogan where he says he isn’t sure if he’s retiring or not. Sid doesn’t care.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

With the music still playing, Sid jumps Hogan but Hulk pounds back and knocks Sid to the apron. The music is still playing and Hogan hits a forearm to the chest and a clothesline to put Sid on the floor. AWESOME opening sequence here and it still works really well. Back in and they stare each other down but Hogan knocks Sid right back out to the floor. Back in again and Sid wants a test of strength.

Sid puts Hogan down but Hulk makes the big comeback to the delight of the crowd. Justice gets knocked into the corner but Sid’s manager Harvey Wippleman (totally unneeded here) distracts Hulk, allowing a chokeslam to put him down. Hulk gets knocked to the floor and hit with Wippleman’s bag, setting up a nerve hold by Sid.

Hogan fights up, only to get put right back down in a side slam. The powerbomb gets two and it’s Hulk Up time. Sid eats a few buckles and it’s big boot, slam, legdrop….TWO? This is assumed to be a screwjob by Sid but in reality, the scheduled run-in by someone we’ll name in a second was late so Sid had to kick out. Anyway there’s the DQ by Wippleman to end things.

Rating: D. Well that sucked. It’s about twelve minutes long and went nowhere at all due to the majority of the match being spent in a nerve hold. Well maybe not the majority but far longer than it should have been. Anyway, this was nothing of note and saving Sid was stupid due to him being gone in a few weeks due to failing a drug test. Nothing to see here, until after the match.

Post match, Papa Shango of all people (the guy who missed his cue) runs out and beats down Hogan along with Sid until the Ultimate Warrior makes a legitimately shocking return for the save. A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. You have two classics, a huge shocking return, and some other decent stuff in there. What else do you want from a Wrestlemania, especially in 1992. Good stuff here as the Hogan era is definitely coming to a close. He would somehow get another world title the next year and the main event here sucked, but things were moving beyond him and it was clear that things would survive. Good stuff here.

Ratings Comparison

Shawn Michaels vs. Tito Santana

Original: B-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Jake Roberts

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Original: A

Redo: B+

Big Boss Man/Virgil/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Repo Man/Nasty Boys/Mountie

Original: F

Redo: D

Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair

Original: A+

Redo: A

Tatanka vs. Rick Martel

Original: D

Redo: D+

Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

Original: D-

Redo: D-

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: D

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

It’s the same overall despite some of the main stuff being different. That’s interesting.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/15/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-8-hogan-who-needs-the-bald-man/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Lucha Underground – March 9, 2016: A Dragon, Time Travel, And Royal Rumble 2015

Lucha Underground
Date: March 9, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Matt Striker, Vampiro

It’s a big night as Mil Muertes is defending his title tonight against Prince Puma and Pentagon Jr. at the same time. Whoever comes out of tonight’s main event with the title is likely going to face the winner of Aztec Warfare II which is only two weeks away. Things are starting to pick up around here and it’s getting more and more awesome every week. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on recent incidents, including: Marty the Moth and his sister torturing Sexy Star, who recruited the Mack for help, Taya Valkyrie’s debut and the World Title match.

Sexy Star is in the back when the Mack comes in to ask her to be in his corner tonight against the Moth. Star looks terrified so Mack gives her a pep talk. This is such a strange looking pairing but I’m kind of digging it.

Marty Martinez vs. The Mack

Mack goes right after Moth to start and fires off a quick backdrop as Striker talks about a garden of gratitude growing between Mack and Star. They’re friends Matt. Just say they’re friends. It’s worked for thousands of years and I assure you it’s going to work here. Moth sends him out to the floor and dances a bit as he takes his shirt off. A big dive takes Mack down again and Moth elbows him in the face for good measure.

Moth misses a top rope splash though and it’s time for a bunch of suplexes. Mack loads up something off the top but the lights go out and music starts playing. A woman in a moth costume comes out and scares Star while also distracting the Mack. Marty drops him again and hits a middle rope curb stomp for the pin at 3:27.

Rating: D+. As is so often the case, this was much more about the storyline development than the action itself. Marty is definitely more of a showman than an in ring performer and that worked well here, but the action was only as good as it could have been between two not great workers in three and a half minutes.

Post match Marty introduces his sister as Mariposa, who kicks Star in the face.

Johnny Mundo workout video.

Video on Fenix, who grew up poor in Mexico but continued to rise from the ashes until he made it here to Lucha Underground. He’s here to rise again and prove everyone wrong because myths become legends.

Dragon jumps Jack Evans but here’s PJ Black with nunchucks for a three way fight. Eventually they beat Drago down but Aerostar time travels in and helps Drago. Good to see them reference last season a bit more.

Cage vs. Johnny Mundo

No DQ. Actually never mind as Taya comes out instead, saying it’s her turn because Mundo already beat her.

Cage vs. Taya

Taya slaps him in the face to start so Cage takes her head off with a clothesline. Cage uses her for some curls before dropping her down in a heap. A rack neckbreaker gets two so Taya hits him low for a breather. Some running knees in the corner crush Cage as the announcers argue over how good Lance Storm (Taya’s trainer) was. Cage powerbombs her against the post and swears at the crowd a bit before dropping her with two more powerbombs.

It’s table time and Cage superplexes her from the corner in the ring over the top and off the apron for a great looking crash. Cue Mundo (it’s about time) to lay out Cage before pulling out a bunch of stuff, including a cinder block. As is so often the case though, this takes way too long and Cage gets up. Some beer bottles to the head have no effect so it’s Weapon X to put Taya away at 7:02.

Rating: C+. Now this was more like it as they stopped the whole “well we have to treat her nicely because she’s a woman.” Save for shots to the face, Taya took harder bumps here than most of the men take with that superplex being a high spot. Mundo vs. Cage is a good feud which I’m sure will be played off in Aztec Warfare.

Another Famous B. ad with him referring to himself as a recently retired underground fighter. We hear a testimonial from someone B. has made famous, which seems to translate from a loser to a good looking woman.

Ivelisse has gotten herself, Son of Havoc and Angelico a Trios Titles match next week but if they lose, they’re out of the company. An argument breaks out as I’m sure you expected.

Aztec Warfare is in two weeks.

Lucha Underground Title: Prince Puma vs. Pentagon Jr. vs. Mil Muertes

Muertes is defending and gets double teamed to start to more effect than I was expecting. The fans aren’t sure which challenger to get behind so Muertes powerbombs Puma to make their minds up for them. For some reason this means it’s time for a Philadelphia Flyers reference from Vampiro as Muertes sends Pentagon out to the floor. Ever the one to fight the odds, Puma dives into a tornado DDT to take Pentagon down again.

Muertes actually dives down onto Puma for his biggest spot to date before all three head into the crowd. Puma gets in a good looking hurricanrana but Muertes hits a running punch to the face to drop him again. A powerbomb drops Pentagon in the ring for two but he comes back with a Sling Blade to put the champ down on the floor, setting up a big dive over the top.

Puma isn’t going to be one upped so he dives onto both guys for a big crash. Pentagon runs back in to dive on Muertes, followed by Puma diving on him as well. The challengers go to fight in the crowd with Pentagon slamming Puma onto a platform, only to dive onto Muertes again. The champ gets all fired up so it’s Puma diving onto both guys with a shooting star out of the crowd. They actually head back to the ring so Puma can kick Pentagon in the head to set up the 630. Muertes comes in for a very last second (and possibly edited to fit) save.

A Randy Orton style powerslam gets two on Puma but Pentagon is right there to break up the Flatliner. Muertes gets dropped with a double superkick but Pentagon comes out of the corner with a Backstabber for two on Puma. Striker: “The shrapnel of flesh litters the battlefield!” Uh, right. Pentagon goes for Puma’s arm but Muertes spears him down for no logical reason. Another spear drops Puma and it’s a double Flatliner for a double pin at 12:10.

Rating: A-. This was straight out of the Royal Rumble 2015 with Cena vs. Rollins vs. Lesnar but with masks and a lot of dives. They did a great job here of making Muertes out to be someone special as it took two of the top singles stars to even slow him down. The ending made it even better with Muertes beating both of them at once, which should write both of these two off as challengers for now.

Catrina gives them a double lick of death but here’s Fenix to say he’s cashing in the Gift of the Gods Title next week for a shot at Muertes.

Overall Rating: B+. I got into this one more than most of the season so far and a lot of that is due to Muertes being in action. He’s one of the strongest stars on the show and you really feel like something special is happening when he’s out there. Above all else though they set up two big matches for next week before Aztec Warfare the next week. In other words, instead of all the potential they keep setting up, we’re actually seeing these matches and stories paying off. That’s the big change that this promotion needed and it’s much better as a result.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – March 10, 2016: The Old Smackdown Try

Smackdown
Date: March 10, 2016
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mauro Ranallo, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Roadblock and the big story for this week seems to be the main roster debut (well full time debut at least) of Sami Zayn. Tonight we’ll get to see Zayn and his longtime rival Kevin Owens together on MizTV, possibly to set up something between the two (or three) of them at Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Tonight it’s Dean Ambrose/Dolph Ziggler/Usos vs. the Wyatt Family.

MizTV gets things going this week with Miz showing us a clip of Zayn running out to save Neville from an Owens apron bomb. Sami comes out first and thankfully it’s still to that rocking Worlds Apart theme. There’s just something about that Sami Zayn entrance that makes me smile and you know it’s going to be something fun. The OLE chants cut Miz off to start but he eventually asks who Sami Zayn is.

Sami talks about doing this for fourteen years and being in NXT for the last few years but Miz cuts him off by actually yelling CUT. Miz wants to hear about Sami’s relationship with Kevin Owens. The story goes back thirteen years with both of them starting in Montreal. They’ve been linked together as friends, tag partners, opponents and enemies over the years and now they’re here as pure enemies. Sami isn’t sure how we got here but Owens delayed his main roster arrival with that shoulder injury.

That means it’s time for Owens to come out and Sami looks sad. Kevin says what he did to Sami back in NXT was what was best for his career. Sami was signed two years before Owens but Owens was on Raw a year before Sami, so who was wrong? What happened at the Royal Rumble was personal though because Owens was the victim there. Zayn gets right to the point: he’s here to stay and wants that Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania.

The fans want to see them fight right now but Owens isn’t so keen on the idea. Kevin doesn’t think Sami belongs in the same ring and goes to walk, only to run right into Neville. Owens has someone else to worry about because Neville thinks that Intercontinental Title would look fine around his waist. That means it’s time for Miz to say it’s his show and that he deserves a title shot of his own. Sami and Miz start going at it and we’re ready for a tag match after the break.

Sami Zayn/Neville vs. Kevin Owens/The Miz

Miz takes Sami down by the arm to start but Zayn spins up and grabs the arm to take over. It’s off to Neville for an arm wringer of his own until Miz drives him into the corner for the tag to Owens. The champ gets hurricanranaed down and we get Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens for the first time in WWE. That lasts all of three seconds though as Owens bails to the corner and it’s back to Miz for another armbar. That fits Owens as a coward very well so all is right so far.

Neville splashes Miz but gets low bridged to the floor as we take a break. Back with Owens taking Neville back into the corner for the tag off to Miz and some stomping. We hit the chinlock for a good while before the Reality Check gets a near fall. Owens demands a tag but has to settle for watching Neville send Miz out to the floor. The hot tag brings in Zayn for the running clotheslines and a tornado DDT for Miz. Now we get the tag to Owens….or at least we would if he didn’t walk out on the match. Miz takes the exploder suplex into the corner and the Helluva Kick gives Sami the pin at 11:44.

Rating: C+. That was fine and it’s cool to see Owens and Zayn go from the indies and make it all the way here, likely followed by a title match at Wrestlemania. Unfortunately it seems like we’re going to see them fighting with a bunch of other people because the idea of a singles match for the title has been long forgotten for whatever reason. These four would be fine but you can almost guarantee Ziggler and a few others being added. Hopefully there aren’t any ladders involved but that seems to be a Wrestlemania tradition these days.

Rock Wrestlemania video.

R-Truth goes to see Goldust in the bathroom but Goldust doesn’t need a helping hand. Goldust isn’t interested so Truth hands him toilet paper. It’s still no though.

Long recap of HHH and Dean from Monday.

Brie Bella vs. Summer Rae

Rematch from Raw with Lana sitting on the announcers’ table for commentary. Lana tells Saxton to shut up because she’s watching the match as Brie is taken to the floor and sent into the barricade. Back in and we hit the cobra clutch while Lana is asked for her definition of a true woman. Lana: “Look at me.” Brie comes back with a middle rope dropkick and the YES Kicks, followed by the YES Lock for the submission at 2:14.

Post match Brie shouts at Lana but goes to knee Summer instead, allowing Lana to give her a second Bella Buster.

Video on Shane McMahon’s in ring career. It’s the same one from Raw.

Here’s Chris Jericho, carrying a Y2AJ shirt over his shoulder, to explain his actions on Monday. The shirt is sat in front of a trashcan as Jericho asks if this is what he gets. The fans are booing him and choosing to cheer AJ Styles. Jericho did what he did on Monday because of those chants. They made him feel like a piece of trash that belongs in this can because he’s still the best in the world at what he does. Jericho lists off his accomplishments, including perhaps the most impressive: he hasn’t been hurt in seventeen years.

After all that though, the fans still chant for AJ Styles. Even after last Monday’s classic, the fans were still chanting for AJ. Jericho has delivered classic after classic in seventeen years and he can’t get a cheer. He’s seen it time after time: someone comes in and could be the best in the world but then they leave after three months because they’re not the real thing. AJ has been here for six weeks (that doesn’t seem possible) and the steam is still coming off his WWE coffee.

Jericho has seen this before and he’s going to be standing around laughing because AJ is going to be just another bust. The fans chant for AJ so Jericho holds up the shirt. Y2AJ was something special but the fans ruined it by chant for AJ. It’s all their fault so the shirt is set on fire because it’s all over for AJ. Lawler: “See this is symbolism Byron.” Jericho mocks the AJ Styles chants as the flames keep coming up. Really, really good stuff here and I’m wanting to see the match now. Well done.

Of note here, the spoilers said that AJ came out here but Ascension of all people cut him off so Jericho could escape. I was wondering how that would make sense on TV but they didn’t bother showing it.

Big Boss Man Hall of Fame video. Godfather continues to be the most out of place name in a class in years.

Lucha Dragons vs. King Barrett/Sheamus

Sheamus and Kalisto get things going with the big man offering some very rude applause. A hurricanrana puts Sheamus down and it’s off to Cara as the dropkicks get going. Lawler thinks it’s a matter of time because bigger is always better. The monkey flip into the splash sends Sheamus out to the floor and the Lucha Dragons dance gets on Lawler’s nerves. We see Ryback watching from the back as Sheamus punches Kalisto in the ribs to take over. Kalisto gets sent outside and we take a break.

Back with Barrett pounding on Kalisto in the corner before it’s off to a chinlock. Sheamus comes in with a running knee to the ribs and a powerslam. Lawler calls Kalisto a gamer but only means he plays video games like WWE2K16. I figured that’s where he was going but it made me chuckle anyway.

Kalisto avoids a charge in the corner to send Sheamus into the post and it’s hot tag to Cara. Everything speeds up and a springboard back elbow drops Barrett. Cara’s standing Lionsault drops Sheamus and a dive takes him out again. The Swanton is loaded up but Rusev shoves him off the top, setting up the Bull Hammer to give Barrett the pin at 10:43.

Rating: C. Well at least the champion didn’t get pinned. This is such a strange dynamic as you have the Dragons as a worthless team but Kalisto was white hot there for a little bit. However, much like so many other things, Alberto Del Rio has crippled whatever momentum he might have had. The matches were fine but Del Rio is such a heat killer. It also didn’t help that Kalisto got pinned in so many meaningless tag matches while he was champion because that’s how WWE rolls. They wouldn’t want him to get hot or something. I mean, he’s just the US Champion after all.

Ryback still thinks that two little men can’t beat two big men. The Dragons tried but not all men are created equal.

Last year’s main event is a Wrestlemania moment.

Very long recap of Vince and Shane from Raw.

The Usos talk about watching the Dudley Boyz twenty years ago as children but now they’re grown men who don’t respect them. Dolph Ziggler comes in and says he isn’t worried about the repercussions from insulting Stephanie on Monday. Random but ok. Dean joins them to say they’re ready for the Wyatts.

Wyatt Family vs. Dolph Ziggler/Usos/Dean Ambrose

Harper and Ambrose get things going with Luke clotheslining him down and stopping to pose. The good guys take him into the corner but the Usos’ wristlocks don’t quite work on someone as strong as Harper. Back with Harper stomping on Jey in the corner but another wristlock is enough to bring in Ziggler. That’s something WWE really needs to work on: so many people use the same basic moves like that wristlock or a kick to the thigh or a superkick. Mix that stuff up as I’m sure there are enough moves to go around.

Ziggler misses a Stinger Splash in the corner and it’s off to Bray for the real beating. Strowman comes in for a big forearm to the chest, setting up a chinlock from Harper. The Fameasser is countered into a powerbomb but Dolph rolls through into a sunset flip for two. The hot tag brings in Jey as things speed up, which unfortunately isn’t getting the crowd into the match.

A good looking superkick puts Rowan in the corner and we get stereo Umaga attacks followed by the double dives over the top. Jey’s Superfly Splash hits knees though and it’s off to Ambrose for the real hot tag. The standing elbow drop gets two on Erick and we hit the parade of secondary finishers. Ziggler can’t superkick Strowman down but Dean sidesteps a charge and gives Rowan Dirty Deeds for the pin at 13:14.

Rating: C+. This started slowly but picked up a lot near the end to help things out a lot. I don’t often notice this but the crowd really didn’t care here. Can you blame them though, as apparently they had four matches on the entire show? I’m a sucker for parades of finishers though and Dean getting the pin over someone not named Bray was the right finish.

Overall Rating: B. Four good to watchable (with the Divas) matches and some storyline advancement with Sami vs. Owens gives me all I need to see on a Thursday night. The best thing Smackdown can do is give a focus to the midcard acts instead of the World Title and McMahon stories and that’s what we got here. I liked the show a lot more than Raw, though I wonder how much of that is due to being able to fast forward through the recaps. There really shouldn’t be that many on a given Smackdown but the McMahons drive business around here, no matter how absurd the story is.

Results

Sami Zayn/Neville b. Kevin Owens/The Miz – Helluva Kick to Miz

Brie Bella b. Summer Rae – YES Lock

King Barrett/Sheamus b. Lucha Dragons – Bull Hammer to Cara

Dean Ambrose/Usos/Dolph Ziggler b. Wyatt Family – Dirty Deeds to Rowan

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: Roadblock Preview

Simple idea this week.

http://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-roadblock-preview/




NXT – March 9, 2016: The NXT Marathon

NXT
Date: March 9, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves

It’s a special show tonight as we’re back at Full Sail but also getting to find out who will be facing Finn Balor in Dallas for the NXT Title at Takeover. Sami Zayn and Samoa Joe both won a triple threat match but then drew in a singles match. Therefore tonight it’s a 2/3 falls match, though the result may have been spoiled with Sami appearing on Raw earlier this week. Let’s get to it.

Quick video on Joe vs. Zayn.

Opening sequence.

Here’s William Regal to get things going with a quick announcement: since Baron Corbin attacked Austin Aries last week, the two of them will be facing off at Takeover: Dallas. Simple and to the point again. He wraps it up by saying we’ll be getting a conclusive #1 contender tonight.

Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn

2/3 falls and we get big match intros. Joe teases a kick to the head to start before taking him down into an armbar. Sami reverses into a wristlock and rollup for two but Joe drives him into the corner. The referee actually stops to lecture them about wanting a clean break which suggests that they have a lot of time to work with here. Joe takes him back down with a hard headlock as the announcers actually keep up with the time frame by saying Joe had Monday off while Sami was on Raw.

The headlock eats up a lot of time until Sami reverses and armdrags Joe into an armbar. La Majistral gets two for Sami but Joe lights up his chest with a chop. Another armdrag sends Joe to the floor but he’s still smart enough to be out of the way before Sami can launch the dive. We take a break and come back with Joe kicking at Sami’s chest to take over. Joe grabs an arm trap chinlock for a bit, followed by a running boot to the face in the corner. The fans start to get behind Sami as we’re treated to his amazing selling.

Sami gets in a kick to the chest but charges into a belly to belly. More hard forearms to the head have Sami in trouble until he comes back with a hard clothesline in a rare power display. Joe’s corner enziguri gets two and a backsplash is good for the same. Sami can’t get a Koji Clutch so Joe plants him with a powerslam for two. Another break gets us past the twenty minute mark and we come back to see Joe hammering him down in the corner again.

Joe takes out the legs but gets sent to the floor, allowing Sami to get in a slingshot moonsault for the first really big spot. Back in and a high cross body gives Sami a rare near fall, only to have Joe turn him inside out with a clothesline. The corner Rock Bottom sets up the MuscleBuster to give Joe the first fall at 27:56.

We take another break and come back with Sami fighting out of another MuscleBuster attempt, only to have Joe ram him into the buckle a few times. Sami dropkicks him for a breather but the referee breaks it up because Joe is busted open. The distraction lets Joe go nuts with strikes to knock Sami across the ring. We get a kickout at two with some bonus yelling so Joe puts on a chinlock. Joe misses a knee drop and gets rolled up for two.

That’s about it for Sami right now as Joe sends him outside and drives Sami into the steps for a long nine count. An STO on the floor gives Joe another nine count and now it’s time for Sami’s comeback with forearms and a suplex which takes quite a bit of muscle. Joe rolls outside for Sami’s flip dive and a quick Koji Clutch ties us up at 38:37.

We take another break and come back with Sami getting two off a Blue Thunder Bomb but both guys are spent. Joe loads up what looked like a superplex but Sami sunset bombs him down for two. With Joe heading outside for a breather, Sami brings back the dive through the ropes into a tornado DDT for a long nine count. The Helluva Kick is countered into a powerbomb into a Boston crab into a crossface into a modified Rings of Saturn. Sami gets his foot on the ropes for the break as we hit 50:00.

Joe waits for Sami to get up and starts in with the strikes, including a hard set of kicks to the head. Sami is crumpled in a ball on the mat before popping to his feet. This time it’s Sami putting Joe in the Koquina Clutch but Joe rolls over and puts his foot on the ropes for the break, just like Sami did earlier. The exploder suplex into the corner sets up the Helluva Kick but Joe steps aside and grabs the real Koquina Clutch, making Sami pass out for the win at 54:08.

Rating: A. Well that worked. Seriously what else do you want me to say? Two guys just fought for nearly an hour and it was one great stretch after another. The only minor issue was Sami being on Raw earlier in the week to spoil this a bit but I think I can live with that one. Joe needed this one as he now has a big signature win on his record and looks on fire going into Dallas where things really could go either way. Great match here and a great way to spend an evening.

Overall Rating: A+. Here’s the thing that pushed this one over the top for me: before and during the match, the announcers talked about American Alpha, Carmella and Bayley being scheduled for tonight. Once we hit about forty minutes in, they said those things would have to be rescheduled. That’s something you so rarely get in wrestling today: the announcers acting like this is real.

It wasn’t a big main event that started with a few minutes left and happened to fit perfectly into their schedule. Instead, this match went on long enough that it changed what they had planned because this wasn’t what they expected. It breaks away from the perfect structure that you’re so often stuck with on most wrestling programming and that’s very refreshing for a change.

Results

Samoa Joe b. Sami Zayn – Koquina Clutch

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6