KB’s Review: The Ballad of Emma
WWE at its finest.
NXT – November 1, 2017: Houston, We HaWARGAMES!
NXT
Date: November 1, 2017
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson
We’re less than three weeks away from Houston and by now a lot of the card can be figured out in advance. The big story from last week is the addition of the Authors of Pain to the main event mix, making things even bigger than they already were. The major match for Takeover hasn’t been announced yet but you know what’s coming. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Andrade Cien Almas will officially challenge Drew McIntyre at Takeover. Their contract signing is later tonight.
Taynara Conti vs. Nikki Cross
They’re not wasting time this week. Cross goes right after her and knocks Conti to the floor for some forearms to the chest. Back in and Conti uses the legs for some kicks to the arm, only to get dropped by a short arm clothesline. A Scorpion Death Drop sets up the swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker to give Cross the pin at 2:38. Energetic while it lasted but you knew Cross wasn’t losing this close to a title shot.
Mercedes Martinez blames her failures on Ember Moon.
Fabian Aichner vs. Johnny Gargano
Gargano takes him to the mat to start and grabs a rollup for an early two. A standing dropkick gets the same as Johnny is moving out there early on. Aichner sends him outside though and we take a break. Back with Johnny elbowing his way to freedom and scoring with a rolling kick to the face.
Aichner makes the mistake of sending Gargano to the apron and then charges into the slingshot spear for two more. The slingshot DDT doesn’t put Aichner away either so he grabs a heck of a powerbomb for two. Gargano is back up with a running kick in the corner but the Gargano Escape is countered into a rollup to give Aichner the clean pin at 9:14.
Rating: B-. Aichner gets a big win and a huge upset but the more interesting story here is Gargano, who is trying as hard as he can but still can’t win a bit match. That has the potential to be a heck of a setup for when Ciampa returns (which should be in the next few months) and I’m really curious to see where they go with that idea.
Aleister Black vs. Velveteen Dream is official for Takeover.
Earlier today the Street Profits were admiring Tino Sabbatelli and Riddick Moss’ very expensive car when Tino and Riddick showed up. Trash was talked but nothing gets physical.
It’s time for the contract signing. Drew comes out holding the contract but Andrade jumps him and signs the contract. Zelina hands Andrade her gum, which he uses to stick the contract to Drew.
Peyton Royce and Billie Kay are upset about Billie not being in the title match when Kairi Sane, with her pirate wheel, comes up to scare them.
Tag Team Titles: Sanity vs. Authors of Pain
Sanity is defending with Alexander Wolfe and Eric Young representing the team. There’s no Paul Ellering at ringside. Wolfe hammers away on Akam in the corner as Mauro talks about Wolfe starting “sports entertainment training” at thirteen. I get not calling it wrestling in a general sense but does ANYONE outside of Vince think that sounds natural or good? Just say training. Anyway Wolfe gets hammered down in the corner and the slow beating begins. We hit a chinlock and take an early break.
Back with Ra’zar holding Wolfe in a front facelock until a double clothesline allows the double tag to Young and Akam. Young cleans house in a hurry and gets two off the top rope elbow. Wolfe comes back in with a top rope clothesline but everything breaks down and the Authors hit the Super Collider. The Last Chapter takes Young down but the Undisputed Era runs in for the DQ at 10:28.
Rating: C+. This was getting good near the ending but you could feel the Undisputed Era interference coming (which isn’t a bad thing). The Authors have gotten their title rematch out of the way and that’s what matters most in all of this. Good main event, but bigger things coming after are more important.
Killian Dain runs in but gets taken down as well. Roderick Strong comes out and puts on the Era’s armband, only to lay them out a few seconds later. The Authors are back up and help Strong clear the ring. Cue William Regal to make the big announcement: a triple threat match at Takeover inside WARGAMES. The fans are stunned and the Takeover: Houston logo turns into Takeover: WarGames as a YES chant takes us out. Mauro: “Houston, we have a WarGames.”
Overall Rating: B. Well that worked. I knew the WarGames announcement was coming and I still got excited when they finally said it. They’re pushing a lot of stories at once here and I’m genuinely interested in how things are going to go in Houston. The Authors and Strong are the weakest of the trios and it’s still entirely conceivable to have them win. Good show this week and a lot of stuff was advanced.
Results
Nikki Cross b. Taynara Conti – Swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker
Fabian Aichner b. Johnny Gargano – Rollup
Authors of Pain b. Sanity via DQ when the Undisputed Era interfered
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Smackdown – October 31, 2017: Rusev Day is Strangerer Than Halloween
Smackdown
Date: October 31, 2017
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
This almost has to be better. After last night’s rather lackluster Raw, we’re continuing the build towards Survivor Series. This week we have a pair of Survivor Series qualifying matches as Shinsuke Nakamura faces Kevin Owens and Bobby Roode meets Dolph Ziggler in a 2/3 falls match. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Shane McMahon to open things up. He talks about how Smackdown has always been seen as the secondary show and the little brother to Raw. Then they went live and made the best of it with Daniel Bryan as General Manager, but they knew they had to do something to shake things up. That’s what caused them to invade Raw, because Smackdown has heart.
Shane talks about how Smackdown had to work harder than anyone else and thanks the roster and fans for everything they do. That brings Shane to last night when Daniel Bryan was attacked by Kane. It was a setup and Shane blames Stephanie McMahon and Kurt Angle. Survivor Series is coming and Shane is going to be the Smackdown team captain. Let’s get to some action though.
Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Bobby Roode vs. Dolph Ziggler
2/3 falls. Ziggler wastes no time in trying some rollups for two, only to have Roode take him down with a clothesline out of the corner. The Blockbuster gets two more and Roode scores with a knee to the ribs. Ziggler hits a quick superkick though and gets the first fall at 3:44. Back from a break with the score being tied up as Roode sunset flipped him for a pin during the break at approximately 7:05.
They slug it out until Roode scores with a spinebuster for two more. The running DDT (without much contact) gives Ziggler another near fall and both guys are down again. Dolph reverses the Glorious DDT into the Zig Zag for two and they hit the rollups with handfuls of tights. Roode finally reverses into the Glorious DDT for the final pin at 11:29.
Rating: C-. Ho, and may I add hum. This was every bit as uninteresting of a match as these two have had yet and that’s a really bad sign. Their feud isn’t interesting and the matches aren’t anything special but for some reason we needed to see them fight this many times. Not terrible here, but I’m very glad Roode is moving on to anything else.
Post match Roode says he’s ready to fight and the next two teammates need to have the same level of passion and competitiveness that the three of them already have.
New Day is in the back, dressed as Jimmy Hart (Woods), Akeem (Big E.) and Brother Love (Kofi) when Rusev and Aiden English come in. Woods speaks in the high pitched voice and Kofi talks about how much he LOVES candy. Rusev takes their candy bucket away and thinks the people giving them candy could be spies from Raw. Halloween is for dumb children and the only holiday that matters is Rusev Day. Rusev CRUSHES the candy and Big E. challenges him to a match later.
Becky Lynch gives Team Smackdown a pep talk and Ellsworth, still on a leash, barks like a dog. Lynch sprays him with water until Natalya comes in to say she should be the captain. They’re all the weak links on the team, though Charlotte seems to be the one that worries Natalya most.
Baron Corbin vs. Sin Cara
Non-title. Corbin goes for the mask to start and throws Cara outside. Cara saves his mask again and slides back inside to kick Corbin in the face. One heck of a forearm cuts off the comeback (Is it early enough for a comeback?) though and Corbin goes for the mask a third time. Cara gets all ticked off and sends Corbin outside for a beating. A spear to the back and more right hands to the head set up another spear over the announcers’ table. The referee throws it out at 2:59.
Cara throws a chair at Corbin, who bails into the crowd.
The Usos are ready to take care of Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose to show that they’re the A team of this B show. My goodness can we please stop with the brands suddenly hating each other stuff? Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin come in and say they get their title shot next week. Gable raps (work with me here) a bit about how they’re going to win the titles.
Here are the Singh Brothers to imitate Paul Heyman and introduce Jinder Mahal. Jinder comes out and says he’ll win at Survivor Series so that people will call him the Beastmaster.
AJ Styles vs. Samir Singh
Singh gets in a slap, only to be taken down and pummeled. The Styles Clash wraps it up at 36 seconds.
Post match Mahal beats AJ down by bending his back around the post, followed by some Khallases.
Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn are AGHAST at the idea of Shane McMahon being the captain. Oh and what kind of man like Randy Orton would use a low blow to win a match? Owens promises to win tonight and lead Smackdown to victory.
The Bludgeon Brothers are coming.
Here are Aiden English and Rusev with the former singing about how much he hates Halloween because IT’S RUSEV DAY!
Rusev vs. Big E.
Big E. is still dressed as Akeem and grabs an early abdominal stretch to have Rusev in trouble. Some stomping sets up the dancing but Rusev pulls E. arm first over the ropes. The same arm goes into the post (Graves: “HAPPY RUSEV DAY!”) and we take a break with Graves being rather pleased.
Back with Rusev working on the arm (at least Rusev Day sees you still being logical) until Big E. comes back with the belly to belly suplexes. The Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Rusev but English starts singing. Woods drowns him out with the trombone so Kofi chases him into the ring for a Big Ending. The distraction lets Rusev kick Big E. in the back of the head for the pin at 7:37.
Rating: D+. Just a match here though I’m glad they went with Rusev getting the win instead of going with the fun option. Throw in the fact that Big E. wrestled dressed like Akeem and things were even better. Of course ignore the fact that on HALLOWEEN, this is the only thing we’re doing, despite last night seeing a Halloween street fight. You know, on the night before Halloween.
Cara says he worked hard to get his mask and he’s not giving it up.
English and Rusev come into Shane’s office to get Rusev a spot on Team Smackdown. Shane is willing to give him a qualifying match against AJ Styles next week. Shane sings good luck.
It’s Fashion Files time and this week it’s Strangerer Things (I don’t watch Stranger Things so I’m going to miss most of the jokes/references here). This is subtitled Chapter Twenty: The Right Side Up. The bulletin board has a variety of tag teams posted and Fandango, who is dressed as a sheriff, feeds Eggos to someone in a tent. Tyler Breeze, in a pink dress and wig, comes in with a box of Uggos, making Fandango wonder who was in the tent. Viktor comes in to say it wasn’t him and the tent starts to shake. It’s Tye Dillinger, also in a dress, who says he’s not another eleven but rather a ten.
Konnor comes in dressed as some kind of a creature but says it’s just a costume. The lights go out and some Christmas lights appear around the picture of the Bludgeon Brothers. The lights flicker back on and the briefcase from a few weeks ago is back. This time though there’s a Saw like puppet, saying let the game begin.
Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Kevin Owens vs. Shinsuke Nakamura
Nakamura wastes no time in hammering away, knocking Owens to the floor with a hard shot. A whip sends Owens into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Owens pounding him down and grabbing a chinlock. A DDT gives Owens two and we hit the chinlock sequel. This version lasts a bit longer until Nakamura fires off kicks, including a big one to the head to really stagger Owens.
The knees in the corner have Owens in trouble but here’s Zayn for a distraction. It’s enough for Owens to reverse a superplex into the swinging fisherman’s superplex to put both guys down. The frog splash gives Owens two but here’s Randy Orton (with more hair than I’ve seen him have in years) to drop Sami onto the announcers’ table. The distraction lets Nakamura score with Kinshasa for the pin at 12:25.
Rating: C+. Like so many Nakamura matches, this was just him going through the motions and being someone who happens to be wrestling. There’s no fire to him and while this is a big win for his main roster career, it’s not exactly thrilling stuff. Then again, with a commercial in the middle and two people interfering, how good could it be?
Overall Rating: C. It’s kind of amazing how much easier it is to sit through this show than Raw. This felt like a show where they were getting ready for a big pay per view while Raw felt like some big calamity with a bunch of stories and styles put together. It’s not a great show or anything but it had a goal and moved towards it, making this FAR easier to sit through than the red counterpart.
Results
Bobby Roode b. Dolph Ziggler – Glorious DDT
Baron Corbin vs. Sin Cara went to a no contest when they both brawled on the floor
AJ Styles b. Samir Singh – Styles Clash
Rusev b. Big E. – Kick to the back of the head
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Kevin Owens – Kinshasa
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Monday Night Raw – October 30, 2017: No. Moving On.
Monday Night Raw
Date: October 30, 2017
Location: Royal Farms Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.
It’s time for the fallout show as we’re less than three weeks away from Survivor Series and Raw is reeling from Smackdown’s invasion last week. The interesting part is whether or not Smackdown will be back this week as it’s time to get ready for the real battle. Hopefully it’s as entertaining as last week. Let’s get to it.
We open with a long recap of last week’s invasion.
Opening sequence.
Kurt Angle is in the ring and the Raw roster is on the stage. Last week was taking friendly competition too far and that was a slap in the face of the people who work here every week. He put them in harm’s way and that will never happen again. Cue the returning Stephanie McMahon to talk about how Monday Night Raw will be celebrating twenty five years on January 22. The show is still going strong and that’s where she and Kurt come in. Angle has lead by example and has even earned her respect.
Stephanie pauses for the YOU STILL GOT IT but blames Angle for last week’s siege. It took twenty seconds to ruin Raw’s history and that’s all because of Angle falling for Shane’s lies. Stephanie goes on a rant about how Angle RUINED, yes RUINED, Raw’s legacy last week in one incompetent moment. Therefore, Angle better hope that he still has it because he’s going to be team captain at Survivor Series. If things don’t go the way she wants, he’s out as General Manager.
Post break Stephanie is leaving and Angle is very sorry. Stephanie mentions Mick Foley as another threat to Angle’s job. As Stephanie leaves, another limo comes up, containing the Miz. Angle isn’t happy with him being late so he’s defending the Intercontinental Title tonight. Miz wants to know who but Angle won’t tell him for being late. Of note: Bo Dallas was back.
Angle being all apologetic and scared here does nothing for him, but it certainly makes Stephanie look like the queen of the world. You know, BECAUSE WE HAVEN’T ESTABLISHED THAT ENOUGH IN THE LAST FIFTEEN YEARS!
Bayley vs. Alicia Fox
Fox comes out in an airline captain’s outfit (well, the female wrestling version) and says this is your captain speaking (eh kind of clever). She has business to tend to so we have a replacement.
Bayley vs. Nia Jax
Bayley charges right at her to start and basically bounces off of the monster, landing on the floor in a heap. Back with Nia holding a chinlock, followed by a pair of running splashes in the corner. What looked to be a Vader Bomb is broken up and Nia is dumped to the floor. Bayley dives off the apron with some right hands, followed by a kick to the face for two. We hit a guillotine choke but Nia shrugs it off without much effort. A spear and the legdrop end Bayley at 7:24.
Rating: D+. You know all those times that Nia has defeated Bayley before? This is the most recent one. The match was yet another destruction of Bayley, who will be the exact same character next week. That’s one of the biggest reasons characters from NXT don’t work in WWE: there’s no development. Bayley had that crisis of confidence over the summer, came back, changed nothing, and is right back where she was months ago. That’s poor writing and a lack of storytelling, which is why Bayley (along with so many others) isn’t interesting anymore.
Alicia picks Nia to be on the Raw team. Nia goes to leave but Samoa Joe of all people is back. Post break, Joe says he knows some people here missed him but he didn’t miss a single one of them. Therefore, when he’s beating the heck out of someone, he’ll be imagining it’s all of the people.
Samoa Joe vs. Apollo Crews
Joe wastes no time in chopping Crews in the corner and it’s not looking good early on. Crews fights back with a good looking dropkick and some right hands in the corner but Joe isn’t about to be suplexed. A kick in the corner drops Crews and Joe throws his gum at Titus O’Neil. Crews scores with an enziguri but the Toss Powerbomb is countered with a headlock takeover. The Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Crews and it’s the Koquina Clutch for the tap out at 3:39.
Rating: D. Samoa Joe gave Brock Lesnar all he could handle on pay per view but he broke a sweat against Crews on Raw? Joe is one of the best monsters on Raw and for some reason they won’t have him squash a jobber to the stars. This was WAY more competitive than it needed to be and it’s not like this company has much credibility when it comes to making new stars at the moment (but they can push Kane of course).
Post match Joe chokes Titus out as well.
Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Matt Hardy
Matt is challenging and wastes no time in trying a small package for two. A backslide gets the same and these early pinfall attempts are working at making Miz sweat a bit. Miz bails to the floor and we take a break. Back with Matt getting crotched on top and a neckbreaker out of the corner getting two. You can tell Miz is working here as his hair is hanging off the side of his head.
Miz puts him on the apron and gets two off a kick to the head. Back in and Miz hits the corner clothesline but the top rope ax handle is blocked. Instead Miz crotches himself in the corner to put both guys down. Matt gets two off a bulldog and drops his middle rope elbow to the back of the neck.
A regular middle rope elbow (that’s a new one) gets two, followed by the Side Effect for the same. Matt scores with a moonsault of all things for two more but Miz is right back with the YES Kicks. A Twist of Fate out of nowhere plants Miz but he rolls to the apron. Back up and Miz snaps him throat first across the ropes, setting up the Skull Crushing Finale to retain at 13:02.
Rating: B. This was much better than I was expecting and a lot of that is because of Matt knowing how to make you buy into his near falls. There’s no reason to really believe that Matt is going to end Miz’s long title reign here but they pulled off a good match. I’m not sure who is taking the title from Miz, but he’s less than two months away from the second most combined days as champion of all time so it’s not happening anytime soon. More than likely at least.
We recap the opening sequence, making sure to show how amazing Stephanie is, just in case you forgot in the last 40 minutes.
Alexa Bliss comes in to see Angle and mocks the idea of Mickie James being a serious contender. Angle isn’t cool with that and makes Bliss vs. James for the title in the main event.
Asuka vs. Stacie Cullen
A spinning backfist drops Cullen and it’s time for some hard knees to the face. Asuka kicks her in the head and the Asuka Lock is good for the submission at 1:42.
Angle grabs a walkie talkie and says the invasion is happening again. It turns out to just be Daniel Bryan and we take a break. Back with Angle yelling at Bryan for wanting to be here to finish the job. Bryan says no but Angle threatens to have the Raw roster destroy him right now. Angle promises to come to Smackdown and even things up.
Recap of Brock Lesnar answering Jinder Mahal’s challenge and Mahal’s response.
Bryan is still in Angle’s office for no apparent reason and sums up what happened in a phone call. The lights go out and we take a break. Back with Bryan in the dark ranting about the door being locked. He says something is wrong and Kane shows up to chokeslam him through a table (off camera of course).
Finn Balor vs. Cesaro
Balor takes him into the corner to start and shouts BAR. That’s still a stupid name so Balor headlocks him down instead. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets Cesaro out of trouble though and he uppercuts Finn into the corner. Balor sends him outside though and the running apron kick to the face drops Cesaro. Sheamus gets in a cheap shot though and we take a break.
Back with Cesaro hitting the pop up uppercut for two, followed by the apron superplex (that never gets old) for the same. We hit the Sharpshooter for a bit with Balor easily powering out. That means a Sling Blade into the corner dropkick, followed by Balor hitting a good looking running flip dive onto both guys. A top rope double stomp to the back gives Balor the pin at 11:28.
Rating: B-. At least Balor got something back after that pretty ridiculous loss to Kane last week. Hopefully he gets a nice run at the pay per view as he still needs to shake off the Bray Wyatt feud. Cesaro losing in a singles match doesn’t mean much as he’s not likely to be getting a singles push anytime soon.
Post match Kane comes out and Tombstones Balor on the stage. HE’S KANE! DOES ANYONE THINK HE NEEDS TO BE BUILT UP TO FACE STROWMAN? And at the expense of Finn Balor? Good grief is there anyone else you want to put Kane over?
Seth Rollins vs. Kane
I WAS KIDDING!!! Cesaro and Sheamus are still at ringside along with Ambrose. Rollins just looks better in the Shield gear. Seth’s early shots have little effect so he scores with some dropkicks through the ropes. The suicide dive is broken up though and Kane runs him over with a clothesline. Rollins hammers away in the corner and kicks at the knee, only to get dropped with an uppercut. You can’t say Kane’s offense is complicated yet it still works well. The side slam gives Kane two and we hit a chinlock.
Back up and an enziguri gets Seth out of trouble and the Blockbuster (still love that move) gets two. A suicide dive is blocked though and Rollins is down in a heap. Back in and Seth’s springboard….I think clothesline is shrugged off as Sheamus and Cesaro are stomping on Ambrose. Another springboard is countered into a chokeslam for the pin on Rolling at 5:42.
Rating: D+. The problem here is obvious: pushing Kane is fine but the idea of having Kane go over Rollins and Balor in back to back weeks for the sake of setting up Kane vs. Strowman is nonsense. Kane is one of the biggest stars ever and is a monster by definition. That’s not something which requires a lot of effort but for some reason we’re sacrificing far more valuable wrestlers for the sake of pushing the guy.
Post match Dean hits Dirty Deeds on Kane but Sheamus and Cesaro come in to help beat him down. Ambrose and Rollins both get Tombstoned, making it THREE former World Champions Kane has decimated in the span of ten minutes. Oh and one thing missing when the Shield was being beaten down: anyone chanting for Reigns to make the save. Isn’t that interesting?
We look at the opening sequence. Again.
Bryan is being stretchered out.
Miz and the Miztourage are ready to celebrate and go into their locker room. They find a bag of trash, which Miz interprets as Braun Strowman coming back. Terror ensues.
Post break Miz runs into Braun and asks him for help with Strowman. Kane says he’s on his own.
Recap of Strowman being destroyed at TLC.
Heath Slater/Rhyno vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows
This is a Trick or Street Fight, meaning the ring is surrounded by Halloween decorations. For costumes, we have Santa and Mrs. Claus vs. Chad 2 Bad/Tex Ferguson (from Southpaw Regional Wrestling) respectively. Slater is sent into a bucket of apples to start so Rhyno makes a save and puts pumpkins on their heads. Heath finds some candy corn kendo sticks but it takes too long to set up a table.
Anderson and Gallows beat Slater down, including shoving pumpkin filling in Slater’s face. Karl crotches himself on a skeleton though just go with it) and there’s a pie to the face. Slater makes the save with the kendo sticks but gets beaten down again. Anderson puts a pumpkin on his own head and Gallows does the same, blinding himself in the process. It takes too long though and Rhyno gets off a table, setting up a spinebuster to put Anderson through said table for the pin at 4:50.
Rating: F. No. Moving on.
Cesaro and Sheamus tell Miz that Strowman couldn’t possibly be back yet. They’re no team though. So is this supposed to be WWE’s version of a horror story? Just because it’s October? It was more effective when Reigns attempted to murder Strowman and it’s not exactly spooky, especially when Strowman is likely back this week or next. On a related note, is Kane getting this kind of a push because he’s a monster and it’s the Halloween season? If so, that’s rather dumb even by WWE’s limited standards.
Elias, with a new guitar, is in the ring for a song. He sings the Ballad of Jason Jordan, complete with shots of Jordan being hit with a guitar last week. Jordan comes out to clean house and breaks Elias’ new guitar.
Miz and the Miztourage go to leave but Angle cuts them off, saying they’re staying or else.
Here are Enzo Amore and Drew Gulak to mock Angle again. Kalisto isn’t getting the title back you see and Gulak is ready to help prove that. Gulak says Kalisto is S-O-F-T, which doesn’t sit well with Enzo.
Kalisto vs. Drew Gulak
Drew jumps him to start but charges into a boot in the corner. Kalisto’s middle rope corkscrew dive and the handspring enziguri sets up the hurricanrana driver. The springboard Salida Del Sol ends Gulak at 59 seconds.
Post match Enzo lays Kalisto out.
Miz is trying to find a way out.
Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Mickie James
James is challenging and scores early with a running kick to the chest. The hurricanrana out of the corner has Bliss reeling and a dropkick puts her outside. Back from a break with Bliss working on a neck crank before switching to a chinlock (totally different you see). Something like an STO gets two and Bliss stands on Mickie’s hair for good measure.
That’s enough to fire Mickie up but Bliss slams her off the top to take over again. An enziguri off the top lets Mickie score with the Thesz press for two. Some rollups are good for some two counts but Bliss punches her in the face for the pin to retain at 11:25. Seriously it was just a right hand.
Rating: D. Well that happened. This was a lot of chinlocking and not much else, which doesn’t make for a strong main event. I was hoping for something like Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks here but instead I got little more than a bad women’s match. James isn’t the most interesting challenger and losing to a right hand is about as low as you can go.
Miz and the Miztourage go to leave and, after cutting back to Bliss celebrating, get in the car, where of course there is a camera waiting. They pull off and are immediately stopped by a waiting garbage truck. Braun comes out of the garbage as we keep cutting to Miz and company in the vein of a bad horror movie.
Strowman poses (in clean clothes despite BEING IN A GARBAGE TRUCK FOR EIGHT DAYS) and chases them out of the limo. They head into the arena, where Bliss is still posing, where Strowman throws Dallas onto the stage. The Miztourage save Miz from going through the table so Strowman takes them to the ring for FIVE running powerslams. Axel goes through the announcers’ table to end the show.
Overall Rating: D-. This is a show where two good matches were powerless to save the show. I’m not even sure where to begin, but we’ll start with Stephanie. Yeah I know it’s her character and we know that’s what she does but come on: the legacy of Raw is destroyed? That’s what we’re taking out of last week’s show?
The same show that had Buzz Aldrin, Florence Henderson and that cowboy whose name I can’t remember as “guest stars”? The same show that had a Rosie O’Donnell vs. Donald Trump minis match? The same show that had Jim Ross’ unconscious head the against the back of Vince’s underwear before Vince, in a cowboy hat, skipped around the ring with his pants around his ankles? NONE OF THAT compares to last week? That’s what we’re supposed to buy as a top story?
Ignoring the Halloween street fight (On the night BEFORE the show THAT ACTUALLY AIRS ON FREAKING HALLOWEEN!), there’s the whole booking the show like a horror movie. Strowman looked like Michael Myers and Kane (who was originally based on Myers) it beating World Champions into the ground. The more I think about it, the more I think they really are pushing monsters like this for the sake of the season of the year, which is as dumb as you can get. Maybe Kane was supposed to be Wyatt, but I can’t imagine Wyatt getting this kind of a push no matter how much more sense it would have made.
On top of that, as of now, we’re not even getting the match that the finishing segment seems to be setting up. Based on what we saw, Strowman should be going after Miz and the Intercontinental Title. What are we getting instead? Strowman vs. Kane and Miz vs. Corbin. After Survivor Series, do you think Strowman is going to go after the title? Of course not, because he’ll want revenge or something like that. That’s fine once in awhile, but when is the last time you remember a feud being after the title? Let them build that thing up once in a while instead of always going for the personal stuff.
The problem here comes down to one simple thing: Kane and Stephanie McMahon came out as the dominant forces on this show. We have two weeks to go before Survivor Series and at the moment, we know one member of the Raw team. In theory people like Kane, Balor and Strowman will be included (it’s not like there are many other options) but none of this has focused on the pay per view.
All we hear about is how it’s Raw vs. Smackdown and champion vs. champion but that’s not enough. The titles aren’t on the line and I need a lot more than bragging rights to draw my interest. There’s nothing going on for this show and, other than Kane and Stephanie (and Strowman, to a lesser degree), there’s no reason to care about most of what’s coming up. Aside from the raid, all we have to go on is some graphics and a one off raid. Things could change, but this show was a disaster that turned me off on the pay per view.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
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Ring of Honor TV – October 25, 2017: I’m Not Really Laughing
Ring of Honor
Date: October 25, 2017
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Colt Cabana
I’m assuming it’s time to start the build towards Final Battle and aside from bringing in an outsider to challenge for the title, things seem to be heading towards Cody defending the World Title against Jay Lethal. I know there’s no story there yet but it’s not like there’s anything else to do. Let’s get to it.
We recap everyone wanting to challenge Kenny King for the TV Title. Tonight it’s a four way for the #1 contendership.
Opening sequence.
Marty Scurll vs. Jay White
Now this could be interesting. Marty grabs the ankle lock to start and takes White to the mat. Jay can’t shake off a front facelock but can manage to put Marty on the top. That means a bird pose and it’s a standoff. Back up and Jay takes him down with little effort, setting up a full Muta Lock.
Since that hold can’t last long, they hit a pinfall reversal sequence for some near falls. Ever the cheater, Marty gets caught putting his feet on the ropes. The referee gets in his face and the distraction lets Marty poke Jay in the eye. Back from a break with Marty hitting something like a reverse Angle Slam for two. It’s time to start in on the arm but Marty takes his time with a charge, earning him a chop.
White wastes no time in swinging away and grabs a suplex for two. A deadlift German suplex gets two more but Marty is back with something like an octopus hold. That goes nowhere so Marty switches into the standing chickenwing. White slips out and gets two off a rollup, only to have Marty throw him the umbrella. Since the referee is half blind, he grabs it as well to take it away from White. That allows Marty to hit a low blow, setting up a small package for the pin at 12:27.
Rating: B-. The ending didn’t work very well for me but these two are both favorites of mine. I’m hoping White doesn’t go back to Japan anytime soon as he’s one of the most consistent wrestlers on the roster. Scurll is someone who always seems to have potential but I’m not sure he’s going to be moving up to the next level anytime.
The Addiction is ready to take care of Jay Lethal Kushida whenever that match takes place.
Lethal is ready to deal with the Addiction because they don’t show Ring of Honor the respect it deserves.
Dawgs vs. Tempura Boyz
The Boyz charge in and start the fight in a hurry before snapping off some German suplexes to take Titus and Ferrara down. The bigger Dawgs are right back though with Sho being sent outside for a suicide dive. Rhett runs Yo down and we settle into a regular match. Will chokes Sho down and a dropkick gives Titus two as we take a break. Back with Rhett grabbing a quickly broken chinlock. Sho gets in a knee to the ribs and the hot tag brings in Yo to clean a few rooms of the house.
Some running knees in the corner (think Sasha Banks) give Yo two as everything breaks down. A superkick into a powerbomb backstabber gets two on Ferrara but Titus slugs the Boyz down with ease. The Boyz start firing off kicks to the head, followed by something like a Shining Wizard for two on Rhett. Ferrara blasts Sho with a wind up lariat and a gordbuster/top rope clothesline to the back (it’s kind of hard to describe) ends Yo at 10:20.
Rating: D+. Neither of these teams are doing anything for me and the fact that the Boyz are heading back to Japan doesn’t cause me any issues. They’ve never been interesting and the Dawgs don’t seem much better. I’m also not a fan of the “screw the tagging” formula and it was in full blast here. It wasn’t a miserable watch but this was almost everything I didn’t like about tag wrestling at once.
The Bullet Club talk about Cody’s contract and laugh hysterically.
Back from a break and they’re still laughing. That made this so much better in an odd way.
Mark Briscoe vs. Chuckie T. vs. Punishment Martinez vs. Shane Taylor
One fall to a finish for a future TV Title shot with Caprice Coleman on commentary. Thankfully there are tags here so it’s Chuckie vs. Martinez to start. A single chop has no effect on Martinez so it’s off to Mark instead. Briscoe hammers away with strikes and punches, only to get clotheslined inside out. Now Chuckle is willing to come back in, only to have his crossbody countered into a World’s Strongest Slam. Well that didn’t work.
Martinez stares Shane down but it’s a missile dropkick from Chuckie to take both of them down. Stereo dives take the monsters down again and we take a break. Back with Mark and Chuckie speeding things up, only to have Mark cut it off with some Red Neck Kung Fu poses. The monsters come in again and punch Chuckie down for daring to interfere. Mark is back up and kicks Shane into the corner, only to get destroyed by Martinez.
A release falcon arrow of all things (looked great) gets two but here’s Shane to clear out the ring again. Shane’s middle rope splash gets two on Chuckie and NOW we get the big showdown. The entirety of the fight: a double clothesline to put them both down and a pair of missed splashes. Back from a second break with Shane and Martinez slugging it out with Punishment getting the better of it until a headbutt staggers him into a corner.
The normal sized guys come back in with Chuckie hitting a sitout powerbomb for two on Mark. Martinez is back up though and it’s a springboard flip dive (geez) to take out everyone else. Back in and a hanging piledriver (think Orton’s DDT but with a piledriver instead) plants Shane, only to have Mark come in with a Death Valley Driver. The Froggy Bow gives Mark the pin and the title shot at 13:30.
Rating: C+. This was the kind of all over the place match that it should have been, which makes the tag match look a little more out of place. Mark winning the title shot is a great idea as him winning the TV Title later in the year while Jay has his match against Bully Ray at Final Battle is an interesting plan. Good enough match here and it did its job.
Post match Jay comes out and says Mark needs to be more loyal to the team. Mark is confused to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. This feels like the build to the last big set of TV before Final Battle, which is where the real stories will take place. Mark vs. Jay has potential, though we might be a long time away from that. The rest of the show wasn’t great, though the lack of star power didn’t do the show any favors. Good enough episode but nothing you need to see.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1996: The Austin Era Really Begins
Survivor Series 1996
Date: November 17, 1996
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,647
Commentators: Jim Ross, Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler
Free For All: Team Bart Gunn vs. Team Billy Gunn
Bart Gunn, Aldo Montoya, Bob Holly, Jesse James
Billy Gunn, Salvatore Sincere, Justin Bradshaw, The Sultan
Holly comes in with a bulldog as we see Aldo walk up the ramp opposite the cameras (an MSG standard). Sultan grabs a chinlock and we take a break to come back with Sultan slamming Bart on the floor so Sincere (a flamboyant yet still generic Italian) can baseball slide him in the face. Back in and Bart grabs a side slam to get rid of Sincere and tie the match up.
Bradshaw (who JR says is going to be something special) comes in and kicks the freshly tagged Holly in the face. We go to a split screen to see Austin running Dok Hendrix out of his dressing room and come back to Bradshaw hitting the Clothesline From an Undisclosed Location to eliminate Holly.
Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart/British Bulldog
Doug Furnas, Phillip Lafon, Henry Godwinn, Phineas Godwinn
Owen Hart, British Bulldog, Marty Jannetty, Leif Cassidy
Leif comes in to cover and the former powerlifter sends him flying on the kickout. The bad guys get smart with a blind tag and a springboard missile dropkick to wipe Furnas out in a great looking visual. JR goes into yet another rant about the referees not catching the heels cheating, which is a really weird complaint for a heel to have.
Paul Bearer insists he WILL NOT get into the cage and be hung above the ring. Mankind will crush Undertaker like the cockroaches he used to eat for dinner.
Undertaker vs. Mankind
Bearer is in an individual cage above the ring and if Undertaker wins, Bearer is his for five minutes. The entrance is an important one as Undertaker descends from the rafters and debuts the sleeveless leather attire that would become his signature look for the next several years. It marks the evolution of the original character to the newer, sleeker fighting machine that could hurt people at will.
Team Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Team Marc Mero
Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Crush
Marc Mero, The Stalker, Rocky Maivia, Jake Roberts
Rating: D. They accomplished the goal of giving Rocky a good rub to start (hence why you have goons like Crush around to take a fall like this) but this was WAY too long. You could probably cut out five to ten minutes here and do just about the same thing. Windham was worthless (as he was for most of the time after 1990 or so) and there were way too many stretches of boring non-action dragging it down.
Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart
Bret takes him down and stays on the arm with a hammerlock until a hard elbow to the jaw puts him down. Austin keeps slugging away until Bret pulls him into another armbar. Bret: “ASK HIM!” Did Jericho get that from Bret? Steve comes right back with a hot shot and starts choking on the bottom rope.
Faarooq/Vader/Razor Ramon/Diesel vs. Flash Funk/Savio Vega/Yokozuna/???
Jimmy almost runs over for the tag back to Vega, who hits maybe 10% of a spinwheel kick on Diesel. Faarooq rams him into the post and the Jackknife ends Vega to hopefully start wrapping this up. The Superfly Splash ends Ramon less than a minute later and then the remaining six come in for the big brawl, resulting in a massive DQ and no winner.
WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Sid
The threat of a powerbomb sends Shawn bailing to the outside and we have a breather. Back in and Shawn gets smart by going after the knee, including a Figure Four (actually done on the proper leg). The hold is turned over and Sid sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. Shawn goes right back to the knee and the fans boo him out of the Garden. Thankfully they catch on to the idea and Sid blasts Shawn to the floor with a clothesline.
Back in and Sid gets in a few kicks to the face, followed by a big backbreaker for two. We hit a cobra clutch of all things (Sid would use that occasionally and it always looked weird for someone his size) before a chokeslam drops the champ. Shawn hits his flying forearm and is loudly booed, though the nipup draws a high pitched pop.
Shawn checks on Jose as Sid poses to end the show.
Ratings Comparison
Team Jesse James vs. Team Billy Gunn
Original: N/A
2012 Redo: N/A
2016 Redo: C-
Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart/British Bulldog
Original: B-
2012 Redo: C+
2016 Redo: B
Undertaker vs. Mankind
Original: C+
2012 Redo: B
2016 Redo: B
Team Jerry Lawler vs. Team Jake Roberts
Original: D
2012 Redo: C+
2016 Redo: D
Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart
Original: A+
2012 Redo: A+
2016 Redo: A+
Team Vader vs. Team Yokozuna
Original: D-
2012 Redo: F
2016 Redo: F-
Shawn Michaels vs. Sycho Sid
Original: C-
2012 Redo: B
2016 Redo: B+
Overall Rating
Original: B-
2012 Redo: B+
2016 Redo: B
And the 2012 Redo:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/04/survivor-series-count-up-1996-thats-blue-chip-right-there/
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Survivor Series Count-Up – 1995: One of Those Good Ideas
Survivor Series 1995
Date: November 19, 1995
Location: USAir Arena, Landover, Maryland
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect, Jim Ross
Mr. Perfect is introduced as a surprise commentator.
BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs
BodyDonnas: Skip, Rad Radford, Tom Prichard, 1-2-3 Kid
Underdogs: Barry Horowitz, Hakushi, Marty Jannetty, Bob Holly
The idea here is people that care about their looks vs. jobbers. Horowitz scored one of the biggest upsets ever over Skip (Chris Candido, a fitness guru. He would later be joined by Prichard under the name Zip. Their manager was the famous one though: Sunny). Jannetty needs no introduction as a jobber.
The Kid is a mystery partner who is freshly heel here. By freshly I mean this is his first match as a heel. Razor comes out to go after the Kid who screwed him over on Raw on Monday. Raw is finally a big deal at this point too. Razor is Intercontinental Champion of course. Radford is Louis Spicolli in a grunge gimmick. Holly is a racecar driver and Hakushi is a Japanese wrestler with tattoos all over his torso.
Razor threw a fit in the back after the loss, throwing a monitor against the wall in the process.
Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze
Bertha Faye, Aja Kong, Tomoko Watanabe, Lioness Asuka
Alundra Blayze, Kyoko Inoue, Sakie Hasegawa, Chaparita Asari
Watanabe comes in but misses a dive. Blayze sends her to the floor and does hit her dive to take over. Hasegawa comes in and hits five rolling double underhook suplexes on Watanabe as Perfect makes sexist remarks. Watanabe hits a seated senton off the top for two as this selling thing is still an issue. Aja Kong, a total monster, comes in with no tag and is immediately kicked in the face and suplexed by Hasegawa. Another Rock Bottom suplex puts her down but Hasegawa jumps into a kick to the chest. Something like a belly to back suplex eliminates Hasegawa to make it 3-3.
Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Goldust
Royals vs. Dark Side
Royals: King Mabel, Jerry Lawler, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Isaac Yankem
Dark Side: Undertaker, Fatu, Henry Godwin, Savio Vega
Rating: D+. This whole match ran just under fifteen minutes and about two of those meant anything. Everything was waiting for Undertaker to come in and dominate, which he did quite well, but getting there was pretty dull stuff. This match is more fun for looking at what these people would become rather than what they are now. Undertaker would lose the mask soon enough thank goodness.
DiBiase and Cornette have a small argument before the next match. Shawn comes in and says chill.
Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna
Shawn Michaels, Ahmed Johnson, British Bulldog, Sycho Sid
Yokozuna, Owen Hart, Razor Ramon, Dean Douglas
Rating: C+. For a match with almost no point behind it and some wacky teams, this was pretty good stuff. The Shawn vs. Razor stuff was interesting as you knew they had chemistry but it was fun to see them without a gimmick. Ahmed looked good but not great here, which would be the right description of him for his entire run in the WWF. Fun match that was never tried again, which I can understand.
More Clinton stuff with Sunny sitting on his lap. Lucky guy.
Bret talks about his previous matches with Diesel, both of which rocked.
Perfect picks Bret, JR picks Diesel.
WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Diesel
Bret starts getting back to the apron but Diesel knocks him off, and for the first time ever, through the Spanish Announce Table. They head back inside and Diesel calls for the Jackknife but Bret falls onto his face from exhaustion. Diesel picks him up to try again but BRET IS GOLDBRICKING and rolls Diesel up for the title out of nowhere in a big surprise.
Ratings Comparison
BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs
Original: A-
Redo: B
Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze
Original: D
Redo: C+
Goldust vs. Bam Bam Bigelow
Original: C
Redo: F
Dark Side vs. Royals
Original: B-
Redo: D+
Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna
Original: C+
Redo: C+
Bret Hart vs. Diesel
Original: C+
Redo: A
Overall Rating
Original: B-
Redo: B
As close as the previous show was to being the same, this one is almost entirely different, yet it leads to a very similar overall rating. That’s a very interesting thing and one of my favorite things to see in doing this.
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6
Survivor Series Count-Up – 1994: Undertaker Isn’t Scared of Chuck Norris
Survivor Series 1994
Date: November 23, 1994
Location: Freeman Coliseum, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Gorilla Monsoon
We open with a clip from earlier today of the team captains giving their teams pep talks.
Gorilla and Vince are dressed as cowboys. Gorilla looks like he could almost pull the look off but Vince looks like a schnook.
Teamsters vs. Bad Guys
Teamsters: Diesel, Shawn Michaels, Owen Hart, Jim Neidhart, Jeff Jarrett
Bad Guys: Razor Ramon, 1-2-3 Kid, British Bulldog, Headshrinkers
Rating: C. This was all angle and not much wrestling. This was the big face turn for Diesel which would result in the World Title very soon after this. It was a face turn that made sense too as he was tired of Shawn telling him what to do and getting hurt as a result, so he gave up and went after Shawn. Ticked off giants are very fun, so the first few months of Diesel Power were fun stuff. It was the other eight or nine months that stopped being fun.
Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us
Royal Family: Jerry Lawler, Queasy, Sleazy, Cheesy
Clowns R Us: Doink, Dink, Wink, Pink
Jerry says he won the match and not the other ones. They celebrate anyway and Lawler keeps yelling, so they turn on him and the clowns join in for a six on one beatdown. The big payoff is Doink hitting Lawler with a pie. This ran nearly TWENTY MINUTES out of a two hour and forty minute show.
WWF World Title: Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart
Million Dollar Team vs. Guts And Glory
Million Dollar Team: Tatanka, King King Bundy, Bam Bam Bigelow, Heavenly Bodies
Guts and Glory: Lex Luger, Adam Bomb, Mabel, Smoking Gunns
A group beatdown on Lex follows the match. The Gunns and Bomb make the save.
Yokozuna vs. Undertaker
Ratings Comparison
Teamsters vs. Bad Guys
Original: C-
Redo: C
Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us
Original: G (as in below an F)
Redo: S
Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart
Original: A
Redo: A
Million Dollar Team vs. Guts and Glory
Original: C-
Redo: C
Undertaker vs. Yokozuna
Original: D+
Redo: D
Overall Rating
Original: C-
Redo: C-
That’s probably as close as any of these second looks are going to go.
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6
Smackdown – May 29, 2003: One Lies, the Other Punches
Smackdown
Date: May 29, 2003
Location: Pensacola Civic Center, Pensacola, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz
We open with a recap of the Vince vs. America shenanigans setting up tonight’s lie detector test.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Sable to introduce the first match, but only after a quick shout out to….Tazz?
Torrie Wilson vs. Nidia
They’re never following up on Torrie kissing Sable are they? Before we get going, Zack Gowen is shown in the crowd. Torrie shoves Jamie Noble off the apron and chops away at Nidia to start, earning herself a knee to the ribs. Nidia grabs a suplex for two as they’ve already done more wrestling than I was expecting.
A shot to the knee has Torrie in trouble and Jamie shouts at Nidia to stay on her. The knee is slammed onto the apron and wrapped around the rope for good measure. Back in and they do the roll over the referee spot so the referee poses on the ropes. Jamie trips Torrie though, allowing Nidia to grab a rollup with tights for the pin.
Rating: D. This was their best way to open the show? I know it’s mainly for the visuals and I’d rather go with this than more of Vince vs. Hogan but they didn’t have any other options here? At least they got it out of the way I guess, but this really isn’t the best way to set the show off on a good foot.
Post match Tazz punches Jamie out and Torrie rips off Nidia’s shorts. Sable throws water at Tazz and bails to end this head scratch inducing segment.
Vince is annoyed that his limo driver has to move the limo out of a handicap zone. He orders said driver to stay right there because this shouldn’t take long.
Stephanie McMahon tests out the lie detector.
Team Angle wants to regain their titles in preparation for Kurt Angle’s return next week.
Eddie Guerrero has Tajiri in Guerrero gear and thinks he can feel some Latino Heat. Tajiri has even stolen his first car! He can even speak English too (which may be a first).
Tag Team Titles: Eddie Guerrero/Tajiri vs. Team Angle
Eddie and Tajiri are defending. Tajiri gets sent outside early on and it’s a double beating until Eddie elbows his way to freedom. A pop up dropkick puts Shelton down and it’s off to Tajiri for those hard kicks. Again: it’s a very simple style of action but he does it well enough to make it work.
Tajiri grabs a sunset flip and rolls Shelton around the ring to really dizzy him up. A double kick to the head gives us a double knockdown though and we take a break. Back with Shelton kicking the knee out (two matches in a row with knee work) to take over. Charlie comes in for a modified Indian Deathlock before it’s back to Shelton for a leglock of his own.
Eddie finally breaks up a half crab but the distraction just lets Shelton come back in sans tag. A headscissors finally gets Tajiri out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Eddie for a monkey flip. House is cleaned in a hurry and it’s time to roll some suplexes. The frog splash crushes Charlie with Shelton making the save. A double DDT takes Team Angle down and it’s the not as hot tag to Tajiri for kicks using the good leg.
Charlie reverses a tornado DDT into a northern lights suplex for two with Eddie making another save. Tajiri superkicks Charlie down and Eddie dives off the top onto Shelton. The Haas of Pain has Tajiri in trouble and the bell rings….because Eddie rang it himself. As the referee yells at the timekeeper, Eddie misses a belt shot. Charlie grabs the belt so Eddie drops to the mat, drawing a phantom DQ to retain the titles.
Rating: B+. I was digging the heck out of this one and the screwy finish was the best way they could have gone as it gives them a reason for another match. Tajiri is an upgrade over Chavo and plays a great partner to Eddie. The tease of a submission at the end worked very well and Eddie was feeling it here, which makes for a nearly instant classic.
Zack Gowen talks about wanting to live his dream but being here as a fan to watch the lie detector test.
The lie detector is set up in the middle of the ring and here’s Vince. McMahon recaps the whole double contract situation and mocks Gowen, who will never be allowed to wrestle here if America fails the lie detector. Here’s America with Vince ordering that he be strapped into the chair. It’s a simple system: ding means true, buzz means no.
We get straight to the questions: he’s Mr. America, he’s in a wrestling ring in Pensacola, Florida and he’s employed by Smackdown. Vince demands the question but America would like a drink of water before answering if he’s Hulk Hogan or not. He says no and that comes up true as well. They ask him again and it’s still not what Vince wants to hear. Vince: “It’s Hogan, Hogan, Hogan, Hogan, Hogan!” America: “NO NO NO NO NO!” Machine: “DING DING DING DING DING!”
That means he officially passes the test and Vince freaks out. He agrees to take his own test but America is getting to ask the questions. Vince is apparently a horrible pervert, a disrespected businessman who doesn’t do things for any fans all over the world, enjoys himself with Torrie Wilson’s Playboy (including in the limo on the way to the arena) and fantasizes about Mae Young. Vince is unhooked and America punches him out. See, now this is the kind of goofy, over the top comedy bit that the story should have been about. It’s not great but I’ve seen far less entertaining bits. More of this, less of America having matches.
Post break, Vince blames Stephanie for the whole thing. Things will change next week.
Chris Benoit vs. Sean O’Haire
Sean walks way in front of Roddy Piper, looking like he wants nothing to do with his mentor. Some early shots to the ribs have Benoit down in the corner but he grabs a dragon screw legwhip for a breather. That’s fine with Sean who takes Benoit down again into a chinlock. Back up and a DDT gives Benoit a breather, followed by a German suplex for two. Piper grabs the leg and actually gets caught in the Crossface. Sean makes a save and grabs a rollup with tights for the pin.
Rating: D. That’s a nice win for O’Haire but he desperately needs to get away from Piper. The pairing isn’t all that interesting in the first place and now Piper isn’t adding anything in the slightest. At least he got a big win here though and wasn’t squashed until the ending, which is somehow an improvement.
We look back at Rey Mysterio defeating Crash and Shannon Moore to earn a Cruiserweight Title shot, which will take place next week.
An injured Rey says he’ll be Cruiserweight Champion next week. He’s all fired up but here’s Matt Hardy to jump him from behind with a low blow.
Kurt Angle is back next week.
Ultimo Dragon is coming.
Rikishi/Spanky vs. Basham Brothers
This would be Doug and Danny’s debut and I still have no idea which is which. Doug and Rikishi start things off with Bashman being sent over the top in short order. Rikishi keeps cleaning house and it’s off to Spanky for a running forearm in the corner. Thankfully the Bashams finally take over and start hammering away with their pretty generic style of offense. An enziguri allows the hot tag to Rikishi, who cleans house with superkicks. The Bashams take a double Stinkface and it’s back to Spanky. A charge into the corner is countered though and Doug rolls him up with Danny adding extra leverage for the pin.
Rating: F. This was more about pushing Rikishi than anything else. He cleaned house multiple times and hit his embarrassing signature move on the newcomers. The Bashams look like a pair of clowns who won on a fluke while Rikishi looks like a world beater. Terrible debut and the team is in trouble from the start.
Vince’s limo is towed and Gowen shows up to gloat. Who knew that regular fans had access to Vince’s limo?
Undertaker/Brock Lesnar vs. FBI
This is your main event people. Hang on a second though as this is a handicap match but Nunzio is in street clothes. He’s injured after last week so we have a replacement Italian.
Undertaker/Brock Lesnar vs. Chuck Palumbo/Johnny Stamboli/Big Show
Undertaker slugs Show down to start but it’s Palumbo stomping at Undertaker in the corner. That just earns him Old School so it can be off to Lesnar for the house cleaning. Brock shrugs off some double teaming and hands it back to Undertaker to work on Stamboli. The running DDT plants Stamboli again so it’s off to Show for the real showdown.
Brock comes in instead and takes a heck of a clothesline to the chest. It’s too early for a chokeslam but Brock has to beat up the Italians. The chokeslam gets two on Lesnar and it’s the Italians double teaming on the floor. Back in and the beating continues as Lesnar is selling too much for the FBI.
A clothesline takes Palumbo down and it’s a hot tag off to undertaker to dominate. Snake Eyes and the big boot drop Palumbo and there’s the dragon sleeper on Show. Nunzio’s save with a chair only annoys Undertaker so there’s a chokeslam. Palumbo breaks it up so it’s back to back for the Italians, only to have the chokeslam end Lesnar.
Rating: D+. So yeah, we’re actually heading towards Lesnar vs. Show again, just in case we didn’t get the point last time. They really need to elevate someone already as this isn’t getting anyone anywhere. Where does this leave Undertaker? Facing the Italians? That’s the best they’ve got? The match was fun while it lasted at least, but Show vs. Lesnar again does nothing for me.
Overall Rating: C+. The tag match more than carries this one and the lie detector segment was a lot better than I was expecting. Smackdown is in a better place than Raw at the moment as they have some pieces to put together but they don’t know the order yet. I’ll take that over thinking Kevin Nash is their best option any day.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/
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Comic Book Review: Invasion From Planet Wrestletopia #1
So in what might not be the biggest shock in the world, I’m a big comic book fan. I’ve had a folder at my local comic book store for over ten years now and at one point had several boxes full of books. Therefore, I was rather pleased when I was contacted by the writer of a wrestling themed comic book, asking if I would be interested in reviewing it. After a rather enthusiastic yes (as it was the first time anyone had done that), I received a few copies of the book a few days later. Let’s get to it.
The comic, entitled Invasion From Planet Wrestletopia, focuses on a former top star of the 1980s who one day declared himself the Galactic Wrestling Champion of the Universe. That’s all well and good, until a transmission of his statement gets to a planet of wrestlers. The aliens take it as a declaration of war and that’s quite a problem.
What surprised me the most here was this actually isn’t a comedy. You would think that a book like this one would be another story that makes a bunch of wrestling jokes and advances the plot in between all of the comedy material. That’s actually not the case here though as while there are some funny moments (and potential for several more), there is actually a somewhat sad story about a former star who is running out of chances and has fallen on hard times.
That’s really surprising but it’s surprising in a good way. I can’t count how many parodies of wrestling or forms of entertainment I’ve seen over the years that take shots at wrestling. You know most of the jokes you’re going to see before they start and that’s only going to take you so far.
However, look at something like GLOW. It’s a series that focuses on the drama and has wrestling as a means to get there. It’s a bit more direct here, but the wrestling is really just a detail. The story could have been about almost anything and you could have gotten to the same conclusion, which is why I could see this having more staying power than just a parody. You can only make jokes about wrestling for so long before it gets stale but a story that has potential like this is a much better way to go.
The other major perk here is you don’t have to like wrestling to understand this. There are a few uses of wrestling lingo but it’s nothing that the average person wouldn’t understand. You can easily understand the story they’re telling and it’s one that I’d like to see more of. Having a story that involves wrestling (albeit heavily) instead of a story specifically about wrestling is a good idea and the right path to take.
Overall, I was rather pleasantly surprised here and that’s always a great thing to see from a comic. I got the characters and ideas the writers were trying to push and the artwork is quite good. It’s a fun story and the ending leaves a lot of potential for more stuff from this concept. I’d check out another issue of this and it’s well worth checking out.
If you’d like to pick up the book or see more from the company that put it out, here’s all the information:
Website:
www.suspiciousbehaviorproductions.com
Amazon:
Comixology:
https://www.comixology.com/Invasion-from-Planet-Wrestletopia-1/digital-comic/56853
Preview of the comic on Tumblr:
Apple iBook:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/invasion-from-planet-wrestletopia/id1272011089?mt=11
Twitter @SBP_Comics and Facebook
Also, if anyone out there has something you’d like me to check out (movie, video, comic, book, etc.), hit me up at kbwrestlingreviews@hotmail.com. I’m always open to checking something out.